#note that I do not recommend this recipe to anyone who is not experienced with making bread

[najia-cooks]

[ID: A plate of light brown bumpy flatbread with blackened spots, surrounded by za'tar and green olives. End ID]

خبز طابون / Khobz taboon (Palestinian flatbread)

Khobz taboon ("taboon bread") is a soft, chewy Palestinian flatbread. It may be eaten with olive oil and za'tar, but it is best known as the base of مسخن (musakhkhan), where it is topped with spiced aromatics and perhaps chicken.

Khobz taboon gets its name from the vessel it is traditionally cooked in—an outdoor, shallow conical oven with an opening at the top and a clay or metal cover to trap heat. Taboons may also have an opening at the side through which the fire can be stoked, especially in the east of Palestine. These ovens were historically made from a mixture of local clay and hay, but have more recently also been constructed from clay treated to be sturdier, or from metal.

A taboon is used by packing flammable material, such as hay, fabric, animal dung, wood, and charcoal, around the outside of the oven and letting it burn overnight; the fire transfers thermal energy to the clay, and to the river stones, sand, glass, or flint stones (صوان, "ṣawwān") that form the base of the oven. The ash is then brushed away, and the flattened dough is placed on the stones or stuck to the walls of the oven to cook. The clay and stones will continue to release thermal energy and cook things throughout the day. The clay and ash give a distinctive flavor to anything cooked inside the taboon, making this method a source of nostalgia for many people who have transitioned to cooking in indoor ovens.

Khobz taboon was traditionally made with whole wheat flour. Most people today use a blend of around two parts white flour to one part whole wheat, or else all white flour; they may even add milk or milk powder to ensure a very soft dough. This recipe uses a blend of flours to combine the nutty flavor of whole wheat dough with the pliancy of white dough. It also begins with an optional pre-ferment to mimic the traditional Palestinian method of including a piece of dough from the previous day's bread into each new batch (like a pâte fermentée) giving a rich and slightly sour flavor to the final bread. It calls for the use of rocks to imitate the bottom of a taboon; the rocks give the khobz its distinctive dimpled texture, and ensure that no interior pocket forms in the bread.

In the years following 2007, the siege Israel had imposed on Gaza caused a shortage of cooking gas that led to a resurgence in the use of taboons. The ovens were used to bake bread and to grill sweet potatoes during the time of their winter harvest. Meanwhile, in the West Bank, Israeli military forces repeatedly destroyed taboon ovens and assaulted villagers who tried to defend them, as Israeli settlers from nearby villages complained about the smoke that the ovens produced. Some of these ovens had been used to bake bread for entire families of 40 or more people. Palestinians continue to build, use, and defend these ovens, despite the fact that Israeli law de facto forbids Palestinians in the West Bank to build anything.

Today, Israel is deliberately targeting and destroying bakeries in refugee camps that had been supplying bread to tens of thousands of people in Gaza, continuing a long campaign of starvation of the Palestinian people.

Support Palestinian resistance by calling Elbit System's (Israel's primary weapons manufacturer) landlord; and donating to Palestine Action's bail fund.

Equipment:

A large, shallow mixing bowl, like a Moroccan qus'a

A large (12"), shallow clay cooking vessel, such as the bottom of a Moroccan tajine (one that is rated for very high temperatures), or a large baking tray

Assorted smooth river rocks of varying sizes, from 1 to 3" in diameter.

Make sure that your rocks have been thoroughly cleaned, and that they do not contain any fissures, cracks, or veins that could contain water (this water, once heated in the oven, could cause the rocks to crack open). Instead of river rocks, I used lava rocks designed for use in a clay tanoor. You just need something to provide thermal mass and give a bumpy texture.

Ingredients:

Makes 3 large breads.

For the pre-ferment:

140g whole wheat flour

1/2 tsp active dry yeast

140g water

You may also use a pâte fermentée that you already have (just adjust the ratio of white to whole wheat flour added later accordingly), or a sourdough starter. The hydration of the starter doesn't matter, since you will be adding water by eye later.

For the bread:

330g bread flour or all-purpose flour

30g whole wheat flour

5g salt

Water

If you skipped the pâte fermentée step, add 170g (rather than 30g) of wheat flour at this stage, as well as 1/2 Tbsp of active dry yeast. I have not tested the recipe this way.

Instructions:

For the pâte fermentée:

1. Mix flour and yeast in a small mixing bowl. Add water and stir to combine. Cover and leave out at room temperature for a day, or in the refrigerator for up to three days. At the end of the rising time, it should be about one and a half times its original size.

For the bread:

This recipe makes a high hydration dough that will need techniques such as slapping and folding to knead effectively.

1. Mix flours and salt in a very large, shallow mixing bowl. Add your pâte fermentée and mix to combine.

2. Add water until the flour comes together into a soft, sticky dough and continue keading. Have a bowl of water on your workstation. Every time the dough starts to stick to your hands or the sides of the bowl, wet your hands and rinse down the side of the bowl with some water. This will gradually add water to the dough.

3. You will notice the dough growing smoother and laxer. At this point, start kneading by repeatedly folding the edges of the dough in towards the center. Do this by occasionally wetting your hands, then running a hand along the side of the bowl and under the edge of the dough to unstick it from the bowl; then fold. You will get stuck less often if you try to touch the dough as lightly and briefly as possible. Every few folds, dimple the surface of the dough all over with your fingertips. You will have been kneading for about 10 minutes at this point.

The dough should become more smooth and less bumpy—you will notice it holding its shape and becoming more stretchy as gluten forms. It should form into a ball when you fold the corners in and hold its shape for a minute, but then gradually expand to take the shape of the bowl. I added about 2 1/2 cups of water total (in dry conditions) during steps 2 and 3.

4. At this point, the dough is wet enough that the slap and fold method is the best way to knead. Wet your hands and again unstick the dough from the sides of the bowl. Hook your hands under the dough and quickly pull it all up into the air; fold the hanging bottom part of the dough under, and plop the dough back down, folding it on top of the part you plopped down earlier. Give the bowl a quarter turn and repeat. Do this continually for another few minutes.

5. When the dough is very smooth and lax, smear some olive oil on the sides of the bowl and under the dough, and pat some oil on top.

6. Cover the bowl and bulk ferment the dough at room temperature for 8 hours, or for 16-24 hours in the fridge. At the end of the rising time, you should see bubbles beginning to form on the surface of the dough.

To shape and bake:

1. Place a layer of rocks at the bottom of a clay cooking vessel or baking sheet. Put the sheet in the top third of the oven and preheat your oven to 550 °F (290 °C), or as hot as it will go.

2. Meanwhile, fold the edges of the risen dough over into the middle a few more times with damp hands. Pinch off a large piece of dough (about the size of two fists), and fold the sides over into the middle to make a neat packet.

3. Drop the packet of dough onto a heavily floured surface, and flip to flour both sides. Pat the dough flat, then throw it back and forth between your hands, catching the edge each time as you spin it through the air, like a pizza crust, to stretch it into a circle about 1/4" (1/2cm) thick with a diameter of about 10" (25cm).

You may also stretch and pat the dough out on a flat surface.

4. Remove the tray from the oven. Flip the dough circle over the back of your hand to transfer it and lay it down over the hot rocks. Re-stretch it into a circle, if necessary.

5. Place the tray back in the oven and cook for 5-7 minutes, until the top of the bread has golden brown spots. Repeat with each piece of dough, leaving the rocks in the oven for a few minutes between each one to allow them to come back up to temperature.

6. (Optional): Hold each flatbread directly over a gas flame for a minute or two to blacken a few spots and mimic the flavor that a wood-fired oven would give to your khobz.

You may also use a method similar to the dhungar technique to smoke your bread. Place each piece of bread one at a time into a large vessel with a closely fitting lid, alongside a small bowl. Light a piece of wood on fire and drop it into the bowl; then cover the vessel with the lid as you allow the wood to smoke for a minute or two.

[keenmarvellover]

POSTS FOR YOU - 2

Some links to posts with valuable content you want in one place.(BASICALLY EVERYTHING IS THERE)

Suggestions and Recommendations are appreciated and accepted.

Last Updated : 31/12/2020

NOTE: Some of these post are written in a crude and unruly fashion. But they contain valuable tips, guidance and information. If you can't/don't want to read such posts, then don't read.

Mental Health

SELF-CARE MASTERPOST

Maybe this is what YOU need or 1 mutual of yours needs. So reblog.

Masterlist for Everything

Abuse. Self-harm. Theraphy. Suicide. Self-love. Coping. Chatrooms.

Masterlist for Everything(Part II)

A list of things to make you feel less overwhelmed.

Masterposts for a Bad Day

Check this out. (Part II)

Anxiety Attack vs Panic Attack

Please share and spread this knowledge.

Health

How to use an EpiPen

Please read the whole thread as tips and small bits of info have been added later

Bonjour Jolie - A site to order Period Boxes

It sends you basics like hygiene products, pain medication as well as snacks and pampering stuff to make you feel good with foods tailored to your specific needs

Staying warm during the Cold Wave

Tips to stay warm during the cold weather (sub zero conditions)

An App for people with problems communicating

during an attack or breakdown

How to get rid of Migraines?

How to get rid of tension migraines, normal migraines and sinus migraines

Basic exercises to do after sitting for a Long time

Please share if you feel you and your mutuals sit in front of a screen for long

Sensory- Friendly Clothing Line

Perfect for autistic children and adults

Chest Binder Information

How, Where and When of Chest Binding.

Artists

Drawing Asian Characters/People

Common misconceptions and some tips.

Free Applications to use instead of Adobe Photoshop

Saves a great deal of money for artists whoc can't afford it

Sites to report to if your work gets stolen

Check it out and spread.

How to draw Hands

With diagrams/pics

Basics for Art Students

That were not taught in school

Apps to find Pictures

Apps that do not steal, or show illegal pictures

Writers

How to write a Bilingual Character

When writing a character, write it effectively. Make it realistic and believable.

Useful Art Resources

This is an extensive list of resources for every problem you could come across while writing/planning/editing your novel.

How to end your Story

Types of endings for your stories.

How to write a Muslim Characters

Don't write stereotypes or false information spread by ignorant racist individuals

Virtue Continuum

A good chart for character development, especially when contrasting how they are vs. how they see themselves

A guide to coding and fanwork in AO3

Did you know you can write "Choose Your Own Adventure" on AO3. Bet you didn't.

Valuable Knowledge if you are planning on publishing a book

Given by a person who actually did it

Tips from an Experienced Writer

on writing scenes with different themes.

How to put “wrote fan-fiction” on your résumé

Actual tips and sentences that can be inserted in a resume for ARTISTS, WRITERS, GRAPHIC DESIGNERS.

Types of knives, blades, daggers and pointy things

References for writing those action scenes

College AU Scenarios

From real life

Character Designing

All aspects are covered.

Readers

Books by Muslim Authors

Some incredible books written by muslim authors that you should definitely check out.(2020 releases included)

Getting Creative on giving your comments

Use these if you wanna leave kudos or like again.

Students

Sites to get Free Course Books

Education is a right, it is not a service.

Tips to study when you have ADHD

May this post make your life a little more less daunting

School Cheat Sheets

I love op. They are a godsend to me and many other students. Period

Study Tips from a Psychology Teacher

To memorize and shit

Chrome Extensions

Note: All these extensions are free

Resources Masterlist for STUDENTS

Good Bless the person who made this.

Museums you can visit online

Saves you time and money

Sites for learning Ancient Languages

Pretty much everything is there

Miscellaneous/Life Hacks

A thread of Tips for Life on Adulthood

Tips, life hacks, everything is there.

Alignments Chart Memes

All empty and ready to be filled by YOU.

For the members of the LGBTQ+ Community who are religious

Please check it out.

Revenge Recipies by LGBTQ+ Community

It is not top secret Family recipe anymore.

If you are feeling bored, things to check out

Includes topics for artists, writers and random.

How to prepare for a Protests effectively

Please share. Valuable tips, guidance, information and help in one place.

Accessible Gardening for people with Physical Disabilities

Link to Book PDF

Clothing Tips and Hacks for Men

Men's fashion.( Collars and Cuffs)

Various Fancy Knots

Something fancy that you can DIY

How to remove A Content Blocker

Or how to get content without removing ad blocker

Make your own Language

This site has its own smart translator.

Sites to find Music according to your tastes

Some sites for when you’re bored and looking for new music

Rotten Apples/Fresh Apples

Check if a certain movie or TV show has any affiliation with anyone who was accused of sexual assault.

Desis

How to be an ANTI-CASTE Ally if you are an Upper-Caste

READ IT.

NOT ONLY DESI

All inclusive list to embrace your culture, history and ethnicity.

Safety

Encrypting Your Internet Surfing

Cybersecurity through firewalls created by Lava Lamps

What to do if you find yourself homeless

Tips for LIVING ALONE

Safety Products for Women

HOW TO FLAG PEDOPHILES

Tips That Can Save Your Kid’s Life.

Recognizing Abuse Masterlist

Fire Safety

If you are taken abroad AGAINST YOUR WILL

[atissi]

What advice would you give someone who wants to play Pathologic but is also terrified of screwing up really badly because I've played just enough of it to feel like there's no way I can succeed without looking stuff up but I don't want to do that! Just basic tips and/or reassurances if you have any?

Updated: Feb. 27 2021 (since I've finished and am replaying P2)

See, the thing about Pathologic is that it’s not possible to “succeed” like you do in other video games. There’s no happy ending for everyone. In the same sense, you can’t really fail. The game accommodates a wide variety of deaths and mistakes—even in Pathologic Classic HD, you can get a character's ending if you hoard enough medicine by the end of the 12 days, no matter how many people get sick or die. In Pathologic 2, everyone can die, but you’ll still be able to get an ending. Even some of the "bad" endings are fun in their own right. Sometimes, the game will reward you with more content because you failed in the first place.

All that being said, I totally relate to your fears. I’ll start by talking about Pathologic 2 first, since I’m more familiar with it. Then there will be some tips on playing Pathologic Classic HD.

Pathologic 2 is incredibly punishing, both emotionally and mechanically. I’ve seen people adapt to this through 3 different playstyles. I’ll rank them in terms of “least close to the intended gaming experience” to “most close”.

1. Just cheat.

“wrt cheating, as a notorious cheater, id recommend trying to do the game as legitimately as possible regardless! if there are some aspects that you absolutely do not vibe with, even with reduced difficulty (for me that's hunger mechanics), i would say that you can load in items to mitigate this aspect. and, tying in with the second point, if you complete a run this way you can always go back and try it legitimately since you've (sort of) gotten an understanding of the mechanic.” - Onion

If you have really bad anxiety, or just dont have the time available to do the other playstyles, cheating is a way to engage with Pathologic 2′s excellent story. Fiddling with the difficulty controls is allowed. Spawning in endless food for yourself is possible. I can even get you in touch with someone who uses cheat codes in the game regularly to get game assets. If changing the game is what it takes for you to get through it, I think it’s better than nothing. But I’d personally at least encourage you to try an Imago playthrough first. Decide if it’s too difficult for you after that. And again: Pathologic 2 is constantly trying to trip you up. It’s meant to be difficult. Sometimes you’ll fail and the game won’t tell you if you could have prevented it. Just keep going. But like Onion said, cheating works as a supplement.

2. Replay, replay, and replay, until you get it right.

“You can always replay. You have more time than they do. Also save states are your friend.” - Alex

“reload as much as possible, do NOT look things up. your first playthru WILL be bad, and thats good!!! experience it fully yourself first. [and] “reload as much as possible” meaning like: [it] isnt a crime, you can do it as many times as possible. but dont get stressed about doing everything perfectly. its an experience!!!” - Zee

There’s no penalty for using your save states. If you get stuck in a death loop, go back as far as you need to in order to get things right. Hopefully this means starting a day over and using your time more effectively. Personally, I got to Day 7 before realizing I had to restart from Day 1, because I was doing that badly. Trust me, if you’ve gotten one miracle cure and 10 bottles of water by then, you’ll be doing better than I was. My friend Bee had trouble too, and took 92 hours to finish their first playthrough. A replay playstyle takes a LOT of time. But Pathologic 2 is so rich in content that replaying isn’t even as annoying as it could be. And this is also the best way to complete as many quests and save as many people as you want. Whenever you’re scared, just remember: you can always go back on your choices! (Other than the theatre’s death penalties. But nothing can help you with those.)

3. Just go through it.

Again. You’re not supposed to succeed in Pathologic. In the words of the lead translator Kevin Snow, “…I know [Pathologic 2’s] script and this is different from other games: there’s so much story locked behind failure and death. You’ll die, and you can’t save everyone. That doesn’t gate you from story; it gives you more. Resist, survive, but continue.” It’s only when you’re suffering that you experience the story so viscerally. That’s when the choices mean something. Sacrificing your own health or the health of others–saving tinctures for yourself, breaking into houses, killing people, choosing not to help people because you just don’t have time–these are impactful because you’re experiencing the mechanical repercussions of your actions. You are not a removed arbiter of the Town’s suffering. Everyone in Pathologic is having the worst 12 days of their life, and you’re dying right alongside them. Spoilers for Day 4, but I don’t think visiting the Rod and seeing the Tragedians would have affected me so deeply if I wasn’t actively starving for the entire sequence. It served as a reminder that I wasn’t the only one in pain; it was heart-breaking and heart-warming. Which I think is Pathologic at its core.

Try to see your failures in the game as another form of success. You’re experiencing the game as it’s meant to be played. And when you feel bad about all the people you’ve failed, remember that this is all a play. The game knows it’s artificial. You can replay the game after you finish–and feel free to use cheats or lowered difficulties on a replay–in order to get everything right. Your mistakes aren’t permanent! But on a first playthrough, try to tough through the hardships. You’ll have a more fulfilling time.

Other tips

You can use these 3 playstyles in combination if you need to. I let myself die when I feel like I deserved the punishment, or reload when I feel like I don’t. Bee managed to finish Day 11 by lowering the game difficulty in the final stretch. Just approximate the intended gaming experience as much as you can.

As for gameplay guides, I don’t think anyone I’ve met recommends it (at least for Pathologic 2). The game does interesting things with when and where it reveals information to you, often in ways that are deliberately inconveniencing. You want to experience that on your own. I also think Pathologic 2 is relatively good at telegraphing mechanics or quests. compared to Patho Classic. That said, I do have tips that I wish I knew before playing:

Sprint everywhere. I know the town is beautiful. But you’re on a hell of a time crunch. If you finish your quests early you can forage or trade for more resources, or just bottom out your exhaustion bar. Sprinting does not make your exhaustion go up faster, and water is plentiful in the first few days. Just do it! Save your own time!

Save a lot. Even if you’re not gonna die on your way in and out of the Broken Heart, this game is chock-full of choices, down to the resource management. If you waste a swig of twyrine, you’ll want a good save point to reload at. You can load any save point in your timeline, so save as often as you want. Keep track of where clocks are on the map--the game tags these in the building descriptions. (For that matter, keep track of where beds are. I didn’t realize I could sleep at Vlad Sr.’s place, which made me waste SO much time travelling between the Shelter and the Lair.)

Learn the trading economy. Everyone holds items at different values. Even the kids value certain nuts over others. There are also some interesting conversion rates between items, like peanuts to soap to pemmican. Make the most of the items you’re bartering. And for that matter, try to build up a cache of items valuable to little girls, in case you find one with a schmowder. The kid’s caches are valuable for trading too: twyrine can show you the locations.

This is also a good spoiler-free guide to Pathologic 2′s mechanics.

For Pathologic Classic HD, I haven’t personally played it, but I’m under the impression that it’s easier than Pathologic 2 because there are less character perma-deaths and no death penalties. The advice about reloading still applies. Here’s what Ally says:

“id recommend using a spoiler free guide (Bachelor, Haruspex, and Changeling guides) but other than that read the diary and letters carefully and try to keep track of npcs that could be affiliated with quests. also! some quests have different options for endings so there could be multiple ways to complete them. stock up on food on the earlier days, and after the inquisitor arrives because the prices drop. try to stealth kill with melee weapons when you can, and also reserve your bullets. …also make sure to trade with the children a lot! hold onto objects like the hooks and flowers [to get schmowders. Like I said before, to win the game you only need enough cures to heal the Bound.] …another tip is to keep a pen and paper around to take notes. like when i got the tincture recipes instead of keeping them in my inventory i just wrote them down.”

And that’s it! If you need specific advice or clarification, feel free to DM me! I love talking about this game. I can also get you in touch with anyone mentioned in this post (except Kevin Snow LMAO). Pathologic has an amazing story and I want everyone to experience it!!!

[borkthemork]

So to anyone who wants to know, I am still productive when it comes to writing, it’s just that each chapter for “Get a Hobby, Asshole” will take a while. To compensate for that I’ll post a preview of chapter two (which will probably change as it goes to the finalized version, so keep that in mind when the final product is published!).

[Note: If you hadn’t seen the first chapter, I’d recommend reading to get some context on this chapter. Other than that, the main thing I would like to detail is that Scar is going by a new name, hence the titling of Mus’ab in this preview.]

Time hadn’t been on Roy Mustang’s side. With prior experience, he expected the project to be concise, quick to finish in an estimated three months. But that was a theoretical; the reality had been quick to correct him, and place him in a moment of clarity that told him of one thing: 

Food was a hard proposal to bargain for, and creating the foundation would take more than just a few signatures and a handshake with a begrudging treasurer.

It wasn’t bad at first. Deep within the Gunja projects, somewhere not too far away from the main roads, Roy and Mus’ab located their base of operations. It had a courtyard, dining halls, pantries, rooms for kitchens. If they wanted to install electricity they could, and the building was close enough to the main roads for them to exit and enter without a problem.

All they needed were the materials, and the current artisans to agree with the change of plans.

That was where the worries came in. Financial flow, after all, was the venom and lifeblood of these intiatives — one couldn’t live without the other. And what Roy needed was the go-to, the signal to continue.

It happened on a sweltering morning, a day after his initial proposal. The Gunja outpost had cleaned itself up for the treasurer’s upcoming visit, and Roy knew to grow cordial when the treasurer’s jeep eventually made its way up the sands. 

The door popped open to reveal a slick-haired man and his two advisors. Escorted out by a band of workers, Roy kept himself close to them — spinning out flattery, like he usually did when it came to the higher-ups — as they made their way toward the sun-stained tent.

Mus’ab stood at the front as planned, eyes attentive when he opened the flap, revealing to them the sleek discussion table at the very center. There were a few fans in the corners, a worker to serve up drinks and food, but overall, this was a bargain that Roy had experienced many times before. Where each player went to their assigned seats, steadied their gazes, and readied their papers under their palms.

For this was where the hard part usually begun.

Roy was an expert at conversation. In fact, he could recall numerous times where he'd gotten what he wanted. But the situation he had before him was different.

He could recall what tools they needed, who should be paid, what ingredients were to be gathered, but Roy preferred to keep his points short. He spoke of the basics, of the general accommodations, because Mus’ab was the one who did most of the heavy lifting.

The Ishvalan discussed the ovens, the tandoors, the available choice cuts, and the menagerie of spices that were supposedly vital to the Ishvalan way of cooking. He spoke of these subjects with control, ease. And thank God he led the way, because to Roy Mustang, this entire idea seemed more and more difficult as the details settled down.

Mus’ab knew what cooking entailed. He probably knew how to harvest plants, to shuck corn, and to handle lambs. What the meeting itself said to Roy was that the plan needed people who knew their way around the kitchen, and ultimately, that didn’t fit Roy's description at all.

Roy didn’t know how to cook. He knew how to boil water, to cut fruits and vegetables with steady hands, but anything else was like flipping a coin to decide your own fate. He preferred to buy noodles, takeout, and, if it was possible, invite Hawkeye over for dinner to save money for the both of them.

Because his hands weren't meant for careful work — they were destined to see action one way or another.

So Roy listened. He listened to these men while the corner radio buzzed Amestrian cabaret, as the workers plopped food and drinks onto the table to endure the remainder of the negotiations. Roy always did prefer the spectacle of good company, of comfort instead of excruciating heat.

It also allowed for him to see what the government workers were like under specific circumstances; when they felt entitled, angered, uncomfortable.

Mister Bombarda — with his grease-slick mustache and buzzcut hair — had shown these reactions the moment he came to the table. He had leaned back into his seat when the first entrée arrived, the chair protesting underneath the strain as words and questions flew out his lips. His actions were enough to tell Roy what this man was like: domineering, speculative, happy to combat and ask inquiries like a man in an interview. The traits of a tired government worker, who’d been digging into Roy’s side for months on end. 

His advisors occupied the seats next to him. Both were grim-faced and sweaty with the minutes that past by — the kind who honed at specific key terms, at the way Roy laughed jovially when he got declined a suggestion, but Bombarda didn’t seem to worry. In fact, he had requested a worker another drink amid Mus’ab’s discussion. And that was dangerous.

Roy knew from the beginning that they had to be careful. Even with his position as Brigadier General, the politics of the post-Promised Day government weren't enough to keep him legitimate. People were testing the waters, observing how mixed the morale had become throughout every aspect of the population, and Roy didn’t want to go through another lecture from Grumman anytime soon about putting too much stress on a leadership that was beginning to stand up from what he described was a “pretty awful epileptic fit”. 

If Roy pushed too hard, agencies had the right to decline. If they relented too much, then government workers could treat him and his workers like rag dolls. Any misuse of money could tarnish future political endeavors down the line. And Roy preferred to keep his cards open, sabotage even more so.

So at the sight of Bombarda’s lean, Roy knew that something was amiss.

“This is rather detailed, General.” The man placed his clipboard down. Roy noted the tiny handwriting, at the amount of purchases that listed upward, abruptly ending where the man’s pen laid. “And surprisingly expensive. I thought the food was the only thing you need.”

Roy put on a smile. Mus’ab, however, just continued to look on, seemingly unamused with the current situation. And to be fair, Roy understood the feeling perfectly. “Well, it’s certainly a surprise, isn’t it?”

A grin grew on the treasurer’s face, wiping a speck of sweat from his nose. “Definitely. Of course, financials are always a pain. Sometimes you just want to stick a fifty grand and get it over with. Hell, funding a city like Daliha is enough to make me want to retire.”

Knowing how they talked about this for over three hours — in the heat no less — the sentiment was mutual. Roy still had to be careful, however. Mus’ab hadn’t said a hostile word yet, and whether he himself had the patience to be here was up in the air. But so far, Mus’ab continued to stare at the three men. In thinly-veiled disdain. Not enough to cause a murder.

“But,” the treasurer continued, “I do agree that the potential for autonomy is there. Food always did bring people to tourist areas. Sometimes they were the main factor for a village’s sheer existence on the map.” Bombarda frowned. “And we all know the Ishvalans need that pick-me-up.”

Roy nodded. He was grateful to see that the Ishvalan next to him had eased his expression, although the sight itself didn’t reassure him. Roy pressed a finger to the table. “So are we in agreement?”

The man nodded. “Only eight months to recreate all four-hundred-thirty-six recipes.” 

Roy didn’t flinch, but the man beside him did — now at full height.

“We cannot recreate these recipes within eight months.” Mus’ab put his hands onto the table, pressing them into the wood as he stared at the treasurer, who looked amused in spite of his advisors’ taut faces and protests. “Cooking is Ishvala’s blessing, one of the many ways the community shows its gratitude toward living. You can’t hurry it lest you want to ruin and mock the recipes themselves.”

“I’m sorry, Grand Cleric Mus���ab.” The apology didn’t reach Bombarda’s eyes, and Roy steeled himself for the oncoming lecture. Not only for the inevitable argument afterward, but to stop himself from doing something he would regret. “But we are focusing on different projects all at once. Agencies are trying to rebuild miles of lost housing, replicating duel-cropping and seasonal schedules. We have agencies trying to connect electricity to the streets, civil workers attempting to bring back families into ready accommodations, and who knows what else. The only reason we're considering this is because of the benefits toward the Ishvalan community and economy. The more stable things are, the quicker we’re allowed to let you all go home.”

Roy was careful to grab the man’s arm, but Mus’ab remained rooted, watching the others. The lines in his nose deepened even more. “And food is important to who we are as a people. It’s what makes the Holy Land our home.”

Before Bombarda could respond, Roy intervened: “Economy is imperative, treasurer. If you hasten the progress on the recipes, it wouldn’t be good for business now, would it?” 

His addition was enough. Not too quick and not too slow, but enough to get the point across. The words had to be perfect, of course. Mister Bombarda liked business. So Roy shall give him business. “Low-quality foods would mean weakening a part of the economy’s stable foundation. No stable foundation, then the entire set-up falls.” His gaze hardened, watching Bombarda’s frown twitch under scrutiny. “We all concur that rebuilding Ishval again would be a waste of money.”

Bombarda stared at him, unblinking. His advisors were whispering into his ears, lips fast and hushed. What they were talking about, Roy could only theorize was a second chance — for Bombarda’s frown grew deeper into his features.

After a nerve-wracking moment, he sighed. “Fine. If you can finish half of the assigned recipes by the end of the deadline, we’ll consider an extension.”

Both continued to stare at one another, unyielding.

“Is that good, Grand Cleric?” Bombarda asked finally.

To Roy’s surprise, Mus’ab sat down. 

His hands folded neatly on the table out of kindness, but the shifting glances and fidgeting hands were enough to make Bombarda laugh anxiously when his requested drink finally lowered down onto the table with a dull tink. “Well then, was a good chat. I just need the room’s signatures and we’ll be on our way.”

The sun receded into the mountains when all of them disembarked from the tent. Roy was at least glad to be able to walk, but his chest still bore heaviness, worry; he spotted the Grand Cleric a few minutes afterward. He was exiting the station — fists clenched, shoulders stiff as a board.

The Ishvalan had a right to be angry, but it was inevitable that they had to work with what they were given. That didn't mean the situation was impossible. They were just going to have to work harder, especially with the limit given.

Roy sighed and made his way to the nearby outpost, spotting Hawkeye, stationed with the nearby jeep. 

He rested his head on the vehicle cushion when they drove out of the outpost. His eyes lulled at the horizon, where the bright light ebbed and seeped behind the dunes, the sky a dimming blue.

When the sun rises, Operation Loghmeh will have begun.

[weaselle]

I've decided.... I'm trans man.... how do I learn to be comfortable with accepting myself existing in ways that other people will criticize? Coming from someone who is scared of anyone being mad -E

Oh wow, I’m like, flattered AND worried that you would ask me, as if I have enough experience and strength of character to be offering solid advice in this area.

Okay, so, first of all, I’m struggling a bit with the inverse of this myself currently; like, I present very masculine to the people around me these daysa, and keep my feminine self largely hidden away. So please take this all with a grain of salt. Hell, you should probably take it with a whole layer of salt and include the lime and tequila.

BUT. I do have some experience that may be relevant, and I’m happy to share that with you in case it helps.

Before anything else, let’s just get this out of the way: on being scared to be around anyone who is mad. That’s. Listen, if somebody is actually ANGRY that you are just expressing your gender, I’m not going to tell you to be comfortable around that -- that’s a danger sign my guy.

Idk how old you are, maybe you’re talking about your parents and that’s something I’m not sure how to council you about, I would maybe refer you to your close friends that know both you and your parents for insight there.But in the rest of the world, if somebody is actually mad because of your gender, there’s nothing about life that says you should be comfortable about that, and it’s perfectly okay to not be comfortable with that. Your discomfort is there to prompt you to assess your safety, and while you are not in danger every single time somebody is mad about your gender, it is reasonable to assess that. Just like it is reasonable to assess your safety if someone is mad about the way you eat a sandwich or anything else there’s no real reason to be angry about, that’s a situation you have to evaluate for safety every time, and I won’t try to tell you to be more comfortable in those situations.

If it’s a big deal, if your life is being impacted negatively by how you feel when people are mad at you, I would recommend either therapy or self defense classes, depending on what you think the root of that issue is for you.

Okay, let’s talk about things.

One thing is, because of my inherent femininity (and some other complicated stuff) it took me forever to fit into masculine spaces well. So I know a little about what it might be like for a trans man. And here is something you may as well know - even if you are 100% perceived as male bodied, if you are in a group of men with no women present and you don’t meet their criteria of “masculine” behavior, often men will treat you in many of the same shitty ways that shitty men treat women. I mean, they will talk over and interrupt you, they will pick you to fetch coffee or clean up after the meeting or take the notes or whatever, they will ignore your good idea and then five minutes later think it’s a great idea when some other man in the group offers the same idea reworded. It’s often not your perceived gender as much as it’s your perceived manliness. 

I don’t know how old you are, but this does seem to improve significantly once you get solidly into adulthood. Still happens tho, especially depending on what group you’re in.

Now, I don’t mean to discourage you, nor tell you to try to fit in -- nobody should try to fit in with shitty people, that’s a recipe for turning out shitty.

What worked for me as a teen and in my twenties was building my own definition of masculinity, really thinking for myself what it means to be a man, how a “real” man talks and behaves. Doing a lot of this is probably the reason I’m non-binary instead of a trans woman today, and comfortable with the world perceiving me as a man -- because I have worked hard on defining and becoming a kind of man that I can be happy as.

This is the route I would recommend to you. Observe men, find role models in both your own life and literature, really consider what being a man means to you... take all the parts you like and a couple you invent and put it all together and call it manhood. Your manhood. 

For me, this meant deciding things like, the kind of masculinity that defines ME is comfortable with male physical contact, publicly enjoys things that don’t fit a narrow view of masculine behavior, and doesn’t care if other people think I’m a “real” man or not, because MY definition of a “real” man is a man whose masculinity comes from within and isn’t defined by others. So I’ll say I think a man is attractive, or talk about crying, or, idk, not know anything about cars or whatever, without feeling like I’m being un-masculine.

Being clear about what you personally consider to be a working definition of positive masculinity will help you be comfortable around people who are going to criticize your manhood. Being able to confidently say “Real men ____”, even just to yourself, will help you feel comfortable around people who might judge you or question your manliness.

There will be pressure and criticism, some doubt and discomfort. Even if you are an adult already, you may have to go through a little second childhood and work through some of the things a boy works through. But that’s fine and normal, right, to be a man you probably have to go through being a boy first, it’s only natural.

You’ll get through that, and when you’re comfortable with the man you are, the script flips on those hyper critical types, because suddenly you’re more sure of your own masculinity than they are their own gender expression -- there’s a fair bit of gender insecurity in people, especially men, a lot of whom have not taken the time to open-mindedly explore what being a man really means to them, and honestly the only reason to be super strict about enforcing generic gender concepts is if conforming to a gender standard they didn’t understand was the only thing defining their own manhood.

Basically, just do you, sir, be your own man. You’ll get comfortable with it, and until you are, remember that every man was once a boy experiencing the same uncertainties. 

Another thing I can tell you is: it’s better in cities.

Like, one of the reasons I’m presenting as masculine all the time right now is because I moved back to a very small town. When I was in San Francisco and Oakland it was just.. easier. In a city, you are never the most interesting person other people have seen that day. For real, like, there’s a woman screaming at a street sign over there and the other direction some dude is walking two snakes on leashes, and ten minutes ago there was a guy running around naked in the middle of a busy intersection; nobody gives a fuck about what you’re wearing or whatever. It’s very freeing.

And in a city you’ll witness plenty of other people living in ways that overlap with your own lifestyle, which is nice. People’s attitudes about things are different, there are so many people, living so many kinds of life, that everybody tends to have a very expanded expectation of what normal is (like, anybody NOT running around naked in a busy intersection has a good start on ‘normal’ already, even the snake guy) and folks usually mind their own business. In Oakland I can keep my beard, put on a pair of heels and some makeup, and walk around running errands and nobody bats an eye. In a small town, it’s often harder to have a normal day if there’s anything “unusual” about how you’re presenting yourself.

So I might consider trying to live for a while in a larger city if you don’t currently and could do so. 

So, that’s most of what I think I can tell you bout being a man around people criticizing or reacting negatively to your gender expression  Feel free to ask for clarification on anything, I hope I didn’t assume too much or come off as lecture-y, I’m really very touched that you would trust me with a question like that.

Go get ‘em, sir!

[samsexualdeancurious]

Thanks For Listening | Chapter 1

Square: Free Space

Pairing: Sam x Reader

Words: 8,498

Warnings: hurt!Reader, pining, eventual smut, dirty talk, voice!kink, unprotected sex.

Summary: Sam hosts two podcasts - a secret one for hunters called the War Room and a public one with fellow hunter Y/N called Criminal History. Y/N and Sam have never seen each other, let alone met, but that doesn’t stop Sam from worrying when Y/N suddenly goes missing.

Betaed by @manawhaat 

Written for @spnkinkbingo

Header by me and Mana

Masterlist - AO3

--

You rest your elbows on the cheap motel table, leaning on it as you speak into the microphone. "Chief, you've heard my thoughts on this. What do you think?"

There's a pause, the same little dramatic one Sam does every time, and then that rich voice you adore says, "I think he's guilty as hell."

You can't suppress a small laugh at Sam's straight-forward statement. "Well, folks, the Chief has spoken - and the jury has, too. Guilty. As. Hell. Keith Hunter Jesperson, A.K.A. the Happy Face Killer, was sentenced to life without parole and is currently housed in Oregon State Penitentiary. If you want to hear another side of this story, I recommend the podcast Happy Face, which is hosted by Melissa Moore, Jesperson's daughter. Anything else you want to add?"

"Definitely check out that Happy Face podcast, guys. It's a great one."

"Thanks, Chief. Until next time, then, folks. This is Criminal History. Thanks for listening."

You sit back from the mic, both you and Sam leaving a moment of silence where Sam can later cut the recording and add in the outro music.

"How was that?" you ask. "Think we need to go again?"

"No, you were great," Sam assures you. "You always are. You know that."

Your cheeks warm at the compliment. "I know," you say, putting on a little bit of a playfully cocky tone. "I just like hearing you say it."

Sam laughs and your stomach does happy flips. "Fine," he teases. "I see how it is. You're just using me for my voice."

"You caught me," you say with enough playfulness in your voice to hopefully combat the heat in your cheeks, even though Sam can't see that.

You find yourself staring longingly at the computer screen, wishing for the hundredth time today alone that you could see Sam's face. But, unfortunately, voice recordings are easier on shitty motel WiFi than video calls are.

“If you think we’ve got everything we need, I’m gonna stop my recording,” you continue, pushing past your wandering thoughts.

“We’re good. Go ahead and stop the recording.”

You do just that, saving the file and uploading it to a file sharing service Sam found. “File’s uploading now. We’ll see how long it takes on this motel WiFi. I’m surprised we didn’t have any connection issues. The WiFi really sucked earlier.”

“Gotta love motel WiFi. What episode number is this?”

“47 according to my notes,” you reply. “We’re not even to 50 and you’re already losing track?”

“I’m running two podcasts. There’s only so much my brain can handle.”

“What? Sam Winchester’s brain has a limit? Alert the media.”

You can practically hear his eyes rolling. “Ha ha. You still chasing that vamp nest?”

“Unfortunately. I’m gonna meet up with Allen Burton tomorrow. He caught wind of the nest moving south past Moab.”

“Allen. I’m not familiar with that name. He’s experienced?”

“Not as experienced as I would prefer but everyone else is caught up in something or on the other end of the country, and I’m not waiting around for these bastards to kill anyone else.”

Sam makes a soft, displeased sound. “Be careful, okay?”

Your heart warms at the concern in Sam’s voice and you try to play it off with a little joking. “Always am.”

Sam doesn’t fall for your change of tone, though. “Y/N. Please. Vampires are no joke.”

“I know. I’ll be careful,” you promise, suddenly eager to reassure him.

“Call or text me when you’ve got the nest wrapped up?”

“Of course.”

---

Sam is reluctant to end the call. He always is. Y/N is just so easy to talk to, which is part of why they make such good co-hosts. Recording their weekly episodes are one of the highlights of his week.

He reaches over and flicks the switch on the wall behind his desk - the one connected to the “Quiet Please. Recording in Progress” sign and the red light above his office door. This was his own special addition to this room and the wiring was a giant pain in the ass but it was definitely worth it to minimize the sounds in the hall outside. 

Someone knocks on the door as soon as the sign and light are turned off. “Come in,” he calls, saving his own audio file to a folder he’ll download Y/N’s to once it’s uploaded.

“Ya done in here?” Dean asks, poking his head in.

“Done with Criminal History,” Sam tells him, spinning his chair around. Another worthwhile investment, his nice desk chair. “Still gotta record an interview for the War Room.”

“I’m Sam Winchester,” Dean says in a gruff voice, stepping fully into the room. “Welcome to the War Room.”

Sam rolls his eyes. “I don’t sound like that.”

“You totally sound like that.”

“Do you have a reason for being here or are you just being annoying?”

Dean holds up a plate Sam didn’t notice he had. “Dinner.”

“Have I really been in here that long?” Sam asks, happily accepting the plate to find that Dean made chicken and rice with chipotle green onion gravy.

“You sure have. You and Y/N must’ve been a coupla of old Chatty Cathy’s today.”

“Yeah, it took us a while to get going,” Sam admits around a bite of food.

“What’s she been up to?”

“Still tracking that vamp nest. It’s moved into southern Utah now and she’s gonna meet up with another hunter, some guy named Allen, to finally take care of it. Well, that’s what she’s hoping for, at least.”

“You two gonna hang out once she wraps that case up?”

Dean shoots Sam a wink and Sam responds with a glare. That only prompts his brother to laugh.

“Seriously, Sammy,” Dean says. “You’ve been digital pen pals for over a year. It’s about time you finally meet.”

Dean’s right and Sam knows he is, but it’s his duty as the younger brother to never admit it. Truthfully, Sam’s dying to meet Y/N. As hunters, they’re both a little paranoid about new people and despite knowing each other for so long, they’ve never actually video chatted, let alone met in person. He trusts Y/N, though. He feels like he really knows who she is, after all their texting and phone calls pre-podcast, all the time they spend just talking ‘off the clock’, and the hours of recorded chat he sometimes edits down into bonus episodes.

In all honesty, Sam likes Y/N. He likes her a lot. He’d never tell her that, though. They’ve got a good thing going and he doesn’t want to ruin that with his own mess of feelings when it’s so much easier to just keep things to himself.

“We’ll see,” is all Sam gives his brother. He drains his water bottle washing down a mouthful of rice and shakes the empty container at Dean. “Can you go fill this?”

“I’m not your butler,” Dean grumbles even as he takes the water bottle.

“Thank you!” Sam calls after him, spinning to put his plate on the desk and really go to town on his dinner. It’s a simple recipe but a delicious one, if a little spicy.

Dean returns with the water bottle just as Sam is scraping his plate clean.

“You’re the best,” Sam says, happily accepting the bottle in exchange for the plate.

“Yeah, yeah,” Dean replies. “Don’t you forget it.”

“I won’t. Now get out so I can record.”

As soon as the door is closed behind Dean, Sam flicks his sign on again and swings over to his microphone. He drinks a little water to clear his throat, checks the clock to see that he has a few minutes left until his guest hunter calls, and hits the record button. A thirty-second wait for white noise and then he leans in a little closer to the microphone than he usually does for Criminal History.

“I’m Sam Winchester,” he says, unable to resist being just a little dramatic. “Welcome to the War Room.”

---

Y/N texts Sam right up until she and Allen are headed out to where they think the vamps are hiding, three days after they’d first met up.

She doesn’t text Sam after that.

---

"You've reached Y/N. I'm probably off having more fun than you are. Leave a message."

Sam signs, scrubbing a hand over his face as he enters the bunker kitchen. "Y/N, it's Sam. Again. Please call me as soon as you can." He hangs up, tapping his phone against his hand as he fights the urge to call again.

"She still not answering?" Dean asks from where he's standing at the stove frying bacon.

Sam shakes his head and shoved his phone in his pocket. "It's been almost a week. I'm getting really worried."

"Do you know where the nest was? Maybe you should go check on her."

"Somewhere in southern Utah. I don't know exactly where, though. Last we spoke she said the vamps had holed up somewhere not on a map." Sam slams one hand flat against the door of the fridge before running that same hand through his hair. "Shit, I should've gotten the coordinates from her."

"Hey, hey," Dean says, dumping bacon onto a paper towel and returning the pan to the burner. "I'm sure she's fine. She probably just lost her phone somewhere and hasn't been able to get a new one"

"After a week?" Sam shoots Dean an incredulous look.

"Just trying to think positively."

Sam slumps, leaning against the fridge. "I know. I'm just-"

"Really worried. I know. I can tell." Dean nudges Sam to the side so he can get a carton of eggs from the fridge. "Are there any hunters we know that are in the area and can check on her?"

"I don't know. I think Charlie was in Idaho."

"Well,” Dean says, cracking a couple of eggs straight into the bacon grease that still coats the pan. “Go give Charlie a call."

Sam feels a little better having something he can do right now and he immediately pulls his phone out. He realizes too late that Charlie is in a different timezone, but by some miracle Charlie is just getting back to her car after a salt and burn and answers after the second ring. She promises to head south and see if she can track down Y/N.

"I'll keep you updated," she promises. "It's almost a seven-hour drive, though, and I need a few hours of shut-eye before I get on the road."

Sam nods, stirring a bit of creamer into his coffee. "Do what you need to do. I don't want you putting yourself in danger."

"I'll text you when I'm on the road."

"Thanks, Charlie. I really appreciate it."

"Hey, man. After everything you've done for me? Checking up on someone is the least I can do. Plus, Y/N is a friend, too. But I know you guys are really close and it's not like her to be out of contact this long."

Sam leans against the counter, suppressing another sigh. It feels like he’s done that a hundred times in the last hour alone.

“Hey,” Charlie says gently, seeming to sense Sam’s distress. “We’ll find her.”

“Thanks, Charlie,” Sam murmurs. “I’ll let you get some sleep.”

They end the call and Sam turns his attention to his coffee, fighting to keep his mind from wandering.

“It’ll be fine,” Dean says from where he’s now sitting at the table, mouth full of eggs and bacon. “Eat some bacon and find something to distract yourself.”

“I’ll try,” Sam mutters, snagging a piece of bacon and heading off to his office.

---

Sam’s really glad they’re ahead on recording for Criminal History because he’s able to lose himself in editing and getting the episode uploaded. Then he gets the next episode of War Room ready to go. From there, though, all he has left is to edit more episodes of Criminal History and he just… can't. He can't sit in his office and listen to her voice when he doesn't know if she's even alive 

No. Don't think like that. He rubs both palms over his face, trying to scrub that horrible thought from his brain. She's alive. She has to be.

--

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--

Team Forever: @mrswhozeewhatsis @books-and-icecream @laughing-at-the-darkness @tumbler-tidbits @imsuperawkward

Team Sam: @saxxxology

Team TFL: @wonderfulworldofwinchester @kickingitwithkirk @muchamusedaboutnothing @ellen-reincarnated1967

[darriness]

Fic - Like You Wanna Be Loved 12/16

Author: darriness

Word Count: 1940

Summary: Honeymoon period

Author’s Note: Only three more chapters and the epilogue left! Thanks as always to my beta, @darrenismydarcy!

AO3 Link

Kurt has decided that his new favourite thing is kissing Blaine. Have you tried kissing Blaine? Kurt totally recommends it. Well actually, no, he doesn’t. Because Blaine is his. But just take his word for it, kissing Blaine is amazing.

He hums into the next kiss as he and Blaine sit on Blaine’s couch. They both have a leg pulled up underneath themselves in order to face each other more easily, and Blaine has one elbow propped on the back of the couch with his hand supporting his head.

They’ve been kissing for the better part of a half hour and it’s lazy, and sweet, and amazingly romantic. Kurt wants to drown in these feelings.

Blaine pulls back with a hum of his own and Kurt opens his eyes to find Blaine’s still closed, a small smile playing at his lips. Kurt beams at the expression and is about to grab Blaine’s shirt to pull him back in when Blaine’s eyes open and the other boy sighs.

“I’ve got to pick Annie up from soccer.” He whispers, regretfully and Kurt appreciates the quality of Blaine’s voice and his unwillingness to spoil the quiet they’ve been experiencing.

Kurt pouts, “Do you have to?” He asks with a hopefully note. Blaine just levels Kurt with a look, and Kurt sighs, “No, you’re right. You’ve got to go get her. Damn your responsible nature.” He makes sure to smirk and poke Blaine’s nose to show he’s kidding.

Blaine chuckles as he grabs Kurt’s hand before he can pull it back and brings it to his lips to kiss softly, “I don’t know. It wasn’t very responsible of me to suggest we skip glee. Especially to make out in my apartment.” He says with a wink.

Kurt laughs softly, even as he blushes, as Blaine continues to kiss his hand, “You have the best ideas.”

Blaine hums and lifts his eyebrows, “Well, I was tired of never getting any quality time with you.” He says and Kurt nods. He gets it. Since getting together almost three weeks ago, the pair have only been able to share brief moments alone. They can’t even be a couple at school, having both agreed that telling people outside of Kurt’s family would cause too many questions, especially with Blaine not being able to hang out with the group. Finn had been the biggest hurdle. They couldn’t very well keep it from him if Burt and Carole knew.

“You can’t tell anyone about me and Blaine.” Kurt had said, walking into Finn’s room after he’d told his family about him and Blaine at dinner.

Finn had furrowed his eyebrows from where he was sitting at his desk with his feet propped up on the wood, “Why?”

Kurt had sighed, “Because I’m already seen as a sideshow freak at school. Could you imagine what this would do?”

Finn pouted and shook his head, “You want to hide that you and Blaine are dating? So that you don’t get picked on?” Kurt had shrugged and nodded, it hadn’t been a total lie. Finn shook his head again, “But...we’d protect you guys!”

Kurt had smiled, fondly, at the other boy, “And while I appreciate that, I just don’t want you to have to.” He said.

Finn had sighed but eventually nodded, “All right. I won’t tell anyone.”

But Kurt knew, knowing Finn, as good intentioned as the tall boy may be, that their grace period would not last long.

Kurt has been trying to think of ways for him and Blaine to be alone more often, but so far, he’s come up short.

“But I really should go.” Blaine continues, “Do you...want to come? There will be less kissing but…”

“Believe it or not I’m not with you for the kisses.” Kurt says.

Blaine puts on a fake shocked expression, “I am offended you don’t like my kisses.” He says, and once again Kurt is laughing.

“Well, not ONLY for the kisses.” He amends and Blaine scrunches his face up adorably.

“So, do you want to come?” Blaine asks again, eagerly.

Kurt licks his lips, “Let me just call my dad to let him know.”

Blaine nods, easily, and rests his head on the back of the couch with his eyes on Kurt as he pulls out his phone and dials his father’s number, “Hey, buddy.” Burt says when he picks up.

“Hey Dad.” Kurt says, “Just wanted to say I’ll be home a little later tonight. Blaine and I are picking his sister up from soccer.”

“Are you ever not with Blaine?” Burt mumbles and Kurt laughs with a shrug his dad can’t see, “I’m going to need you home by six. Carole has a new recipe she’s been dying to try on us and I told her we would all be there.”

Kurt sighs, “Is this a healthy meal?”

Burt chuckles, “I thought we got over you policing my meals when I married Carole.”

“You’re my dad. I never stop worrying about you.” Kurt watches as Blaine smiles softly at him and he smiles back.

Burt laughs again, “And I love you for it even though it’s unnecessary. All right, dinner. Six. And bring this Blaine kid. I’d like to get to know him better or, you know, *meet him*.” He emphasizes and Kurt suddenly feels his throat close up.

“Ummm Dad, Blaine can’t come. He’s babysitting his sister tonight.” He says with what little air he can draw in and he watches as Blaine’s eyebrows furrow.

“Then have him bring his sister. Carole’s making more than enough. You’ve been dating this boy for almost a month and we haven’t met. Something is wrong with this picture.” Burt says.

Kurt winces and looks at Blaine, “Let me...call you back, Dad. I’ll talk to Blaine.”

“What’s there to talk about? He’s coming. So is his sister. See you at six. Love you.” Burt says and then the line goes dead.

Kurt pulls the phone away from his ear and stares at it like it’s a foreign object.

“What was that all about?” Blaine asks.

Kurt answers without looking up from his phone, “My dad wants you...and apparently Bethany...to come to dinner tonight at my house...with my family.”

Blaine blinks at him owlishly for a moment and Kurt suddenly feels like everything is going to come crashing down, “But you obviously don’t have to!” He exclaims, “I’ll...make an excuse.”

“Hey, hey, no.” Blaine says, sliding closer to Kurt on the couch and grabbing his hands, “I would love to meet your family, it’s just...a little overwhelming.”

“And terrifying?” Kurt snarks.

Blaine chuckles, “Yeah a little terrifying. But from everything you’ve told me about your family? They sound like amazing people. Heck, them inviting Annie was enough to prove that they are amazing. I think we should go.”

Kurt pouts his lips thoughtfully, “Why do you call Bethany ‘Annie’?” He asks instead of answering.

Blaine’s eyes widen slightly in surprise before he shrugs, “She couldn’t say her own name when she was learning to talk. She called herself ‘Annie’ and so *I* started calling her ‘Annie’ because I thought it was funny and it just...stuck.”

Kurt smiles at Blaine, “Will you and Bethany come to dinner?” He asks.

Blaine smiles as bright as the sun, “Yes, we would absolutely love to.”

-- -- --

“But I’m all sweaty!” Bethany whines, tugging at her t-shirt, as the trio make their way up Kurt’s front steps. They hadn’t had time to go back to the apartment after picking up Bethany so the nine-year-old hadn’t been able to change after her soccer practice.

Blaine laughs, “You’re nine. Nine-year-old sweat is not a real thing.”

“Classy, Blaine.” Kurt says as he shoves Blaine playfully, causing the other boy to stumble slightly, “You smell and look lovely, Bethany.” He says to the girl who smiles shyly, “All right,” He says as they get to the door, “My dad will try to act tough but he’s really a big softy and yes...Carole really is that sweet.” He says before pushing the door open.

-- -- --

As the night progresses, Blaine finds himself amazed by the relationship between Kurt and his dad. Not only does Burt Hummel seem like an amazing human being in his own right, Kurt and his dad have such an easy relationship. So much so, that for the first time in seventeen years, Blaine is jealous.

He never had that kind of relationship with either of his parents (and don’t get him started on how close Kurt and Carole appear without even being biologically related), even before they left, and watching it play out before his eyes is both heartwarming and gut-wrenching.

At one point during dinner, Blaine is so caught up in listening to Kurt and his dad banter that he misses Kurt slipping his hand into Blaine’s under the table, “You okay?” Kurt asks, clearly having finished talking to his father.

Blaine nods, “Yeah, just...taking it all in.”

Kurt smiles and squeezes Blaine’s hand.

-- -- --

Kurt walks Blaine to his car after dinner. He can’t keep the smile off his face. Not only did his dad seem to like Blaine, but Carole had even offered to have Bethany at the house from time to time after Blaine mentioned how often his parents ‘asked him to babysit’.

“Please make sure to thank your dad and Carole for me again.” Blaine says as Bethany gets in the backseat and Blaine leans against the driver’s side door as Kurt sidles up in front of him.

“I will.” Kurt assures as he sways his way closer to Blaine and grabs the lapels of his jacket in both hands, “Thank you for coming tonight.”

Blaine smiles, “I love that we were able to come.” He whispers and then leans in to give Kurt a sweet kiss.

Kurt is sure the kiss is meant to be quick but suddenly Kurt’s arms are around Blaine’s shoulder’s and Blaine’s hands are on Kurt’s back as the kiss deepens. He feels Blaine’s tongue touch his own and can’t help but moan, forgetting where he is and who might be around.

The pair is rudely reminded of where they are, and who is around, though when Bethany exclaims, “I’d like to go to bed soon! I can’t believe I’M the one reminding you of my bedtime.”

Kurt and Blaine turn to find Bethany standing next to her open door and rolling her eyes even as she smiles and slides into the backseat. Blaine chuckles and Kurt sees his cheeks pinken even in the waning light of the day, “I guess we better go.” He says.

Kurt nods, not removing his arms from Blaine’s shoulders, “See you tomorrow morning?” He asks.

Blaine nods, “Totally. Though I’ll let you know if something changes and I won’t be there.”

Kurt nods and pulls Blaine in for one more, quick kiss before pushing away from Blaine and letting the other boy get into the car. He watches as the car pulls away, waving when Blaine and Bethany do from the car.

Kurt takes a moment to think about how much his life has changed in only a month. A month ago he was confused about the relationship between him and the new boy at school who acted strangely and didn’t seem to want to hang out, despite being extremely friendly at school. Now though, not only was he dating said boy, there were no secrets between them and now said boy had met his family.

Kurt wraps his arms around himself as Blaine’s car disappears and smiles to himself. Life is good.

[larpgourmet]

Running a Meal Plan (Part 1)

So you like to cook, and you want to run a Meal Plan for your LARP. But where do you begin? If you’re reading this, you’ve probably never done anything like this before. (Or you have, and you felt overwhelmed when you did!) This is going to be something of a recurring thread, as I’m sure I’ll come up with more tips and tricks. But this first post is going to be where you should start for preparation -- and will hopefully serve as a sanity check to decide if this is something you’d like to take on for your LARP. If this is your first time ever running a Meal Plan, and you’re working alone, I would recommend capping yourself at 10 people (include yourself!) That’s more than enough to feed, and will give you an idea for what you’re getting yourself into. If you have a significant other or roommate who you trust to stick out any meal plan work with you at gathering, you can consider going up to 20 (10 people for every dedicated individual to the meal plan), but I might still say consider a cap of 10 for your very first game, no matter what. See how everything goes. Running a meal plan at game will mean that you miss a lot of action. You will need time to prepare, serve, and clean after every meal, and for a standard weekend LARP, that’s at least 4 meals (5 if you decide to do something for Sunday morning). You’re looking at about 2 hours per meal, minimum. Add an extra hour if you decide to go fancy. If you like to cook, and like the downtime of doing something more mundane between fights, then that might not be a deterrent for you! But I think it’s worthy of knowing before you start. Tip One: Enlist Help Yes, people are paying for your meal plan services (be sure to charge a little more than you pay for the food -- you are putting in time and effort even before you get to game, and you may also want to buy extras to make your life easier, or make your presentation more beautiful!) But -- if you are running this while also being a player, it is no fun to have to be alone while other things are going on. Consider having people on the meal plan sign up for shifts. They can help you cook and serve, or clean, or guard you in case enemies come up while you’re cooking. Either way, people will be around for you to RP with while food is being made, and that will be a HUGE help in making this experience more fun. Tip Two: Be Realistic with your Space If you drive a 2-door car to game, and are usually packed to the gills, take a step back before offering to run a Meal Plan. You’d be surprised at how much space meal planning eats in your car. On average, when I was running a meal plan, it was two coolers, an insulated cardboard box, a huge dry goods bag, and a campstove. Additionally, if you usually drive with other people, make sure they understand what you may be bringing, and that it may cut into any space they assume will be in the car. (Protip: If you agree to do this, get a photo of everything you’ll be bringing to share with your driving buddies, so they have a visual idea of the space you need each game.) Tip Three: Leave Yourself the Whole Week before Game Be done with your craft projects a full week ahead of game, so you have the week before game to shop, prepare, and organize your meal plan. Trust me, you will be much happier not trying to juggle crafting time and meal prep time. Tip Four: Make a Sample Menu, and “Buy” for It Make a shopping list for a sample meal plan, complete with amounts you will need to buy, and hit some of the stores in your area to see how much it would cost to purchase. See if you would benefit from having a membership to some place like Costco or Sam’s Club. Also see if ordering some of your ingredients online will save you any money. Dollars add up in the long run, and then you’ll know how much you want to charge to ensure you’re not footing any extra bill. Side Tip: Your first couple of Meal Plans are going to be MUCH more expensive than you expect, especially if you don’t often cook for yourself from scratch at home. Random things like oils, vinegar, and spices add up -- but often only need to be purchased once every couple of months or less, and then space themselves out for purchase afterwards. Don’t be discouraged if things feel expensive the first time. Once you have a good spice cabinet settled, and have all of the tools you need to make it easier, it will get cheaper. And you’ll get better at sourcing your fresh food on the cheap. When I became experienced at running a meal plan, I often hit four different stores the Sunday before gathering, because I knew who had the sales I needed. Tip Five: Get the Lay of the Land Ask other people who attend your game how they deal with logistics for food. Where do they dispose of their greywater? (Greywater, in case you don’t know, is generally it is defined as wastewater produced by appliances -- but in this use, we’re talking about wastewater that might contain soap, fats/grease, or salt. Not good for soil and plants at your site! Make sure you figure out a way to dispose of it safely.) Do they know of a good place to get electricity if you need it? What’s allowed in terms of campfires/cook tops? Don’t start planning for what you’re going to bring until you know what facilities are available to you. And be realistic about the openness of those facilities. If your camp site has a kitchen, how many other people are going to be trying to use it? Is there a schedule that you can take advantage of? If it’s first come - first served, you may want to plan to cook on your own cook top. Tip Six: Prepare to Tell Folks to Bring their own Services Don’t waste your money on disposable flatware and plateware. It’s a mess, and people are terrible for keeping track of their stuff. They’ll have half a drink of water out of one of your cups, and then throw it away. And then gods forbid anyone outside of your camp hears that you’ve brought extra cups. Impose an early rule that anyone on your meal plan needs to bring their own service (plate, bowl, mug, fork, knife, and spoon). You can provide napkins or papertowels, and a plastic tub for them to rinse or wash their own services when they’re done eating. Be sure to impose a rule that they have to clean their own dishes! Tip Seven: Plan for Incidentals There’s some random, and sometimes not so intuitive things you will want to have. Like I said above, plan to bring a big plastic tub to wash your dishes in, which means you’ll also need a way to have clean water to rinse your dishes, a sponge, soap, and a towel to dry them off with. You might also want your own trash bags (and some sort of collapsible trash bin), extra propane tanks (if you have a propane stove), matches, Sterno and Sterno stoves to keep things warm if you feel it’s necessary, atmosphere friendly serving bowls, and napkins or paper towels to clean up messes. Tip Eight: Keep a Journal You are going to need to be a business owner when it comes to the Meal Plan, so get some sort of book that can travel with you to game to help you out. For each meal plan, figure out how many people you can reasonably serve, and label those spots, writing in each person’s name until your slots are full. (And they will fill up, trust me.) Make notations whenever those people come to a meal to get food so that you know you’ve fed them. (This helps both to ensure everyone gets at least one serving before you give out seconds, and to help you track a friend down for meals if they’ve been skipping.) Make notes if someone is going to be on an NPC shift for a meal, or what assistance they’ve signed up for (see Tip One). Make additional notes if a person stiffs you on assistance or money. As much as it sucks to have to tell someone that you’re not going to offer your Meal Plan to them anymore, it’s good to have proof written down if someone is consistently not upholding their end of the bargain. Tip Nine: Try All of your Recipes at Home First The last thing you want to do is experiment with recipes when you’re feeding people. That’s just stressful. Cook everything at home first. See if you like the taste, make notes on what parts you want to make at home vs. what you will make at game. How can you make the recipe easier on yourself? Are there any allergens in the recipe? Tip Ten: Executive Decisions Are Your Friend Too many people try to decide things by committee. If you are running a Meal Plan, you decide what time the food is served, and you decide what is being offered. Avoid polls asking people what they’d like to eat, or when. It’s good to know if anyone has any hard food aversions or allergies, so you can plan for those -- but outside of that, let it just be your decision. Believe me when I say, it’s much easier on everyone.

[simonjadis]

"Subverting expectations" should be something akin to what it adds to the story and not outright replaces. In addition, a writer should employ it based on what they feel in right for their characters and story with deep consideration. It seems like with recent examples that need no introduction do it to "please the audience" when they should write the sort of the story they'd want to read and/or watch themselves. It should come from the heart if you don't mind cheese.

I had not heard of that cyborg incident, anon! That sounds great.

(And I’m behind on DuckTales – the last episode I saw was Della’s first episode; I love Paget Brewster as her voice almost as much as I loved Paget voicing Poison Ivy)

I totally agree with you!!

Sometimes, I am horrified when I learn that feedback has convinced a storyteller to go in a different direction, even if I 100% understand why. Other times, it’s a great thing.

1. Good Case: Griffin McElroy is informed by fans of the Bury Your Gays trope, and his narrative returns two Tragic WLW as dryads (I’m not there yet in The Adventure Zone; I’m so nervous about continuing The Suffering Game)

2. Bad Case A: video game creators listen to disproportionate outrage from entitled forum bros and yield to their demands to include less queer content and fewer characters of color in the next game, or to sideline that content and those characters

3. Bad Case B: Joseph Morgan is a handsome, talented actor, but his desire to go forward with the story of Klaus Mikaelson on The Vampire Diaries should not have changed existing plans. I know that this is Extremely Writer Of Me but, to my mind, that’s like putting on a puppet show and one of the puppets whirls around and tells you to not kill him off. I’m not mad that the spinoff happened or anything, I just think that Klaus is a terrible person who deserves to die, however sympathetic aspects of his backstory may have been.

Anon, you wrote “a writer should employ it based on what they feel in right for their characters and story with deep consideration“

the line about with deep consideration is especially good, and something that many of us forget to express

because I’m gay, I’m going to pick an example – there are stories I might write in which the word “faggot” appears a great deal. it’s a slur, but it might be appropriate for characterization or setting. that doesn’t mean that it needs to be part of the story that will be consumed by an actual human audience, some of whom may have heard that word yelled at them at the worst moments of their lives

I could also write a fantasy setting in which that words holds no particular meaning, and someone’s name might happen to be that. it’s not like the fantasy character speak english or have that slur – the name just happens to be that, and exists within that world’s context. BUT again, this is going to be consumed by an actual audience, and I can just … not do that

in a previous post [X], I discussed worldbuilding and narrative choices, and used a domino/marbles analogy. another analogy might be baking – you choose the recipe and the ingredients and how they’re introduced and combined, but once placed in the oven, it all has to work naturally – you can’t force a cake to rise

if you do that in a story, people will know that something isn’t right

but choosing the recipe/ingredients and how they’re combined isn’t an excuse to do whatever you want.

you can choose to, as you note, set things up so that a woman who might have been fridged will instead be in a position to become a cyborg. (I don’t know a good baking analogy for that)

there are ways to include bigotry, death, and horror in your worldbuilding without focusing upon these elements for shock value, and that’s because the storyteller also controls the perspective

for another poor analogy, let’s say that you’re using your phone to record a video tour of your house – a walkthrough. you can use camera angles to avoid showing that place where the carpet just isn’t the same as it used to be, or that side of the couch that the cats chose as a scratching post, or that place where your drunk buddy decided to throw food onto the kitchen ceiling to see what stuck and now it’s discolored. storytellers can do this by choosing who (first person or third person limited) is telling the story, by choosing an unreliable narrator (usually just someone without the social awareness to realize what’s going on around them), or by taking the story in other directions

which means, and I know that this is a tangent but you reminded me of it, that stories can avoid gratuitous depictions of sexual assault or domestic violence and focus on fun things, like werewolf violence or whatever. it doesn’t mean pretending that those things don’t exist, it’s just prioritizing what gets “screen time”

that’s another place where deep considering comes into play. what things need to be part of the media experience, and which things can’t be left aside? for example, with very rare exceptions, i recommend against following the story of anyone experiencing gastrointestinal distress and related symptoms. someone can have a stomachache and then stay in bed with a time skip or someone else’s POV for a while. with rare exceptions, we don’t need to follow that person into the bathroom. the same is true with sexual assault and domestic violence, only this time we’re adding potential reader trauma to the list of reasons to tilt the metaphorical camera in another direction; if a character says that their ex was “a bad man” or warns someone away from X tavern, I believe them

obviously, sometimes stories do include horrifying elements; there are very few absolutes in writing

[barely restraining myself from talking about showing-vs-telling and some discourse I’ve seen about it]

I absolutely do not mind cheese, anon, and I agree that stories should metaphorically come from the heart

I do think that a lot of television writing has less of that because it’s, well, a job. the story should still make sense, and ideally everyone in the writer’s room feels passionately about some aspect of the project, but any mercenary writer is going to have some things where they just do their best and then call it a day. the story needs to make sense and engage audiences, but it doesn’t have to be a passion project

if a writer does a good job of entertaining themselves, they’ll usually do a decent job of pleasing the audience. there are exceptions.

not everybody has a foot fetish, Joss

[howdytherepardner]

take, cut, spread, done.

there are a few things that do not matter, and then there are the bagels offered on school nights in the dining hall of whitman. community hall, rumored to be both named after the "ebay community" and tall as hell due to no money for a second floor, is often host to a few scholarly groups spread throughout the whole space. i always feel a little bit bad entering, any entrance has massive doors that slam shut and likely serve as a mild disturbance not only to my general passive gait but to the conversations, focus of other in the space. a community hall indeed, though there have been a few late nights where i've been there entirely alone. my first Dean's Date stands out in memory, where between 3:20 and 4 am i took a study break to sing a bit of Simon and Garfunkel. but back to breakfast. i don't remember when i was made first aware of it, perhaps a recommendation from an rca or a discovery after an event in the hall that night, but much like murray dodge cafe or computer clusters, the pseudo-continental breakfast spread is a necessary aspect of my understanding of how this campus exists. whether it be terrible coffee, fruit, or foam bowls of cap'n crunch, the offerings on the counter provided a kind of disoriented comfort, giving you some sense of standing in a necessarily transitory space. but the offerings of bagels, made somewhat fresh in the morning now stale at the day's end, and peanut butter, a local/organic chunky variety, facilitated the most familiar, filling experience for me on those late nights. my go-to after a later wake-up before high school was an untoasted lander's and jif, which was more than satisfactory, but this ~fancy~ upgrade to an assonine thing could be symbolic of many things. bagel, spread peanut butter, a crack of salt and pepper if you're feeling fancy. same formula, different ingredients. ~ medium fine grind, 30 grams coffee, 500 grams near-boiling water. wet the filter with hot water before the grind goes in, then blooming with 70 grams of water, aggressively swirling before letting sit for 30 seconds. aggressive pour to close to the top of the v60, then slow the rate to the same pace at which coffee drains into the decanter. after reaching 500 grams of water, stop, let it drop a little bit before lightly swirling once, then again after the water drips lower with a bit more force. let drip until it ends. discard filter and grounds. if feeling fancy, pour coffee between decanter and a large container to cool a bit quicker if you're impatient. swirl decanter before pouring your drink. sip first, then down it. often, this has been the extent of my breakfast, which my stomach certainly files its own concerns about, dear reader. i recently reconsidered the peanut butter bagel, what used to be a late night snack, a journey to the dining hall with my roommates amid school work, to put it back in the breakfast rotation; an investment i make the night prior when picking up to sustain a tolerable existence the next day. two days i have a nine am lecture, and the prospect of a hot coffee and a bagel less than 3 feet from my room has been quite the pull factor in getting me to class (albeit, an average of 3 minutes late). i am flung this point; perhaps if a theme of this writing is the attempt to process my pandemic experiences, then it occurs to me that this was my most consistent morning breakfast: - being sent home meant a return to landers and a new use of the Mr. Coffee once reserved primarily for visiting relatives whose caffeine needs were supplemented by things other than diet coke - first fall arrangements meant bagels less frequently, but still peanut butter toast and a decently sized pot of melitta. - campus spring was mason jar tea-like improv and first venturings v60 and, whenever i was up early enough for breakfast (more than occasionally) but didn't feel like scrambled tofu, pre-packaged bagel and not-one-but-two individual peanut butter packets. recipe becomes routine, routine becomes ritual, ritual becomes recipe. ~ "10-20-40" is the third track off of Rina Sawayama's debut

extended play, Rina, released on 27 October 2017. Written by Sawayama and produced by Clarence Clarity, the lyrics offer an insight into Sawayama's experiences with depression and taking SSRIs, delivered through car-related metaphors.

... In an interview with Hannah J Davies for The Guardian in January 2018, Sawayama explained: "The metaphor is about teetering on the edge, but also the romance of driving, and the romance of taking Citalopram or being depressed in the media, when actually it's so mundane. It's a daily chore." (x) ~ being that my room is 3 feet from a kitchen, my room is generally subject to the various sensations that emerge from that space, though seldom emerging from my own efforts. despite my independent status and residence in a spelman room, i rarely use the stove top and have not once taken advantage of the oven. always indulging in the smell of food, i do also sometimes allow myself to be treated to the generous leftovers of my roommates' endeavors. overall, though, my plan for meals (not to be confused with the official designation of 'Meal Plan') has been entirely inconsistent. it will be leftovers one dinner, the tail-end of a happenstance free food event the next, Two Extra Meals, dinner with a work shift, Nassau St. fare, and who knows what else. i am wondering on what it means to be in an eating club. the start of this year has seen even starker lines of experiential division; where guest meal policies have normally allowed people to take options with relative ease, both university dining and club policies started as very exclusive to people beyond their plans, meaning that your meals are at a single institution, and that's it! the option exists, of course, to eat elsewhere, but this requires expenditures in addition to the 9-10k that you (by extension of your parents) dropped on the club, and it seems like the calculus of each meal not consumed would loom. the arrangement seems so suffocating! there are aspects of these particular institutions that i think are questionable (beyond just bicker, mind you), but i think i'm also coming to terms with the fact that a large part of my disdain for these institutions comes from the fact that it is just... not my preferred experience. what to me is thinking of cost-per-meal and the constriction of the same people is to others a more secure place, a sense of stability when other aspects of their social alignments and experiences shift. i have never felt particular excited to get a meal within the Great and Mighty Brunch Mansions, but people do. frequently whether i would feel differently if my context was such that i (by extension of my family) could securely afford such an experience, and what social development prior to that would imply, but for now i think i am tired of worrying about things beyond myself and my control. after all, ain't i the hypocrite in saying this but joining a co-op? besides a lower price tag and greater labor invested into the experience, it is structurally comparable from an organizational standpoint ( 1. clubs composed of students 2. where they [could] source most of their meals and 3. eat with other students). but it is the cultural distinctions of these arrangements that matters most. i don't think i'm experienced enough with either arrangement at present to discuss those distinctions with confidence yet, and i trust that anyone with enough familiarity to recognize what i am referring has their own understanding of it developed, in any case. nothing original to contribute yet, though i feel motivated to get ahead for the classes whose (self)placement in these institutions looms.

~ so that's it, i believe. i am supposed to have a routine right now, and in practice i do in the minds of others; i go to my scheduled classes, i attend these meetings, i hang out with others. not a uniform schedule, but a consistent set of behaviors that makes me, to others as a social entity, a ritualistic person. in the place between body and mind, i feel the grand variance of my own perception, as colored by my emotional state (to put it melodramatically). the narrative of my life to me is a pathway, and the presence of my life to others is a point of checking in. my routine is only fueled by a desire/need/compulsion to continue changing, and it is only when those changes alter my social routine that those beyond myself can note it. i suspect that someday, perhaps even tomorrow, i will disagree with that, but i feel confident in saying this: i will never get tired of a peanut butter bagel, even as the seasonings change.

[rixxy8173571m3w1p3]

The Conservatory

I wrote this while I was was supposed to be working on other fics and projects, but I couldn’t resist. Concerning what kind of plants he’d probably have was a combined effort. @another-sanchez-slut and others for letting me ask random plant questions.

A Doofus Rick x Reader fic.

In this fic the reader spends a day in Zeta-7s conservatory.

________________

Hopefully you hadn’t worked yourself into writer’s block again.

You had a deadline to make, and you didn’t have time to procrastinate. You needed to finish writing the last couple of chapters before sending it to your editor. Still, you couldn’t focus. There was something about the quiet in the house, it was distracting. You glanced at your phone, and thought about calling him.

Perhaps you should call, you knew he wouldn’t mind, and he might be home. Then again, he might be busy, and if you called, you’d interrupt any project he might have been working on. You were looking for a reason, trying hard to think of a friend that you could count on, but there was no one else, no one reliable enough. Time was getting shorter and there was much for you to do, but as the quietness of the room threatened to suffocate, you dialed his number, and waited for him to answer. His cheerful voice made you feel slightly better, and you told him the reason for calling.

You just needed to hear someone’s voice, anyone’s voice. In your line of work, you tended to isolate yourself, and while you enjoyed your own company, on certain days you felt so very alone you’d thought the silence would eat you alive. It turns out he wasn’t at home, but at work on some distant planet you weren’t allowed to know the name of. Still, he was happy to hear your voice as well, and shyly told you how much he missed you. Perhaps, he needed to hear someone’s voice as well, one that was not his own.

With all the negativity he dealt with in relation to his job with the council, sometimes he’d portal straight to your place, and hold you in a soul crushing embrace before returning to the hell hole he had just come from. This wasn’t one of those times, but you heard it in his exaggerated cheerfulness, as he tried to be strong for your sake. To think, you had called to receive when it was you who should have given.

Your loving friend, your beloved boyfriend, you needed to color his world. You congratulated him for having the honor to be on such a mission, whatever it was, and couldn’t wait to have that promised dinner.

When he dropped the facade, you could hear the exhaustion, and frustration he had tried to hide. Since he was on break, he had time to talk to you about other unrelated matters, and you listened. It was night time where he was, and it made him sleepy and eager for a cup of tea and a good book. Being the cheeky creature you were, you comforted him with gentle words, with a brief description of your mismatched pajamas. And when he chuckled, you felt your heart swell.

There it was, the Rick you knew. It didn’t take you long for you to have him laughing, nor did it take long for his personable nature to unravel you, and make you vulnerable in the way only Zeta-7 knew how to do. Lost in the moment, you began to flirt, and he chuckled nervously, and in all his nervousness to move away from listening ears, he dropped his phone. It was cute how nervous he still got, but you stopped when you heard the Ricks in the background.

You didn’t want to give those mean Rick’s another reason to bully him. Nonetheless, you were disappointed that he wasn’t home, and you were going to hang up, and return back to work, but he offered to allow you to sit in the conservatory. You admitted that you were afraid you’d hurt one of his plants, but he chuckled, and said that you’d never do such a thing on purpose. So, you accepted.

___________

You used the spare key to get in.

Something about Zeta-7s house always made you feel calm, almost in the same way your medication did. The sunflower rug you stood on was as brilliant as ever, the living room, and the house itself seemed to invite you. Near the window stood his easel where an unfinished piece was covered. On the couch, sat an array of plushies, a colorful pillow, and a quilt. Every square of the quilt was a scene, telling a story, but the last one blank. Perhaps it was unfinished.

Everywhere you looked, you saw color, it fed your eyes, enriched your soul, and it struck you with that nostalgic, heart heavy feeling; it felt like home. This feeling which visited from time to time, most particularly when you felt lonely, other times when you felt lost. There was something grounded, almost planted, and somewhere your were infected by its spores. This illness of feeling, of the ever wicked anxious mind, it made you feel too much.

Still, you could move, and you did.

In the kitchen, the turmeric powder was still open, and you figured he must have left right away, for the breakfast dishes sat in the sink, and next to it a empty container of tofu. Hmm, seems like he tried that recipe you had recommended. You set down your laptop, and began to clean up the kitchen for him. If he were at your home, you knew he’d do the same. When you finished cleaning, you headed toward that sacred place, more sacred than his underground lab.

The place he visited almost religiously, which you’d like to think of as his secret garden, a place of secrets, with messages among the thorns, and love painted among their leaves. Emerson knew best when he said ‘The lover of nature is he whose inward and outward senses are still truly adjusted to each other; who has retained the spirit of infancy even into the era of manhood.’ Upon entering, the differences in scents and temperature were obvious. The air was thick, and heavy with moisture, laden with nature’s earthy perfume. You closed the door behind you, and with caution walked around.

This was Ricks sanctuary, his breathing space. Like his home, great thought and planning had gone into its design. Within those glass walls, freedom, sincerity, long suffering, and love, existed in their stems and branches. Angels trumpet hung high and proud, Bougainvillea had claimed the wall of the furthermost corner, a Tropical beauty sat below the banana plant. Various palm-trees, as well as orchids, birds of paradise, fiddle leaf, elephant ears, sat in painted pots.

You realized that every bit of space was used to its fullest potential, with just enough to walk around, snug, but comfortable. How many happy hours had he spent with these friends? How many hours did he tend to his plant children? How many tears had they seen? Did they know the whispers of his heart?

If only they could say.

Up above, were the air plants in glass globes. They varied in size and in them they held mosses, to flowers, to things you’d never seen. Terrariums held what appeared to be small ecosystems of their own, where micro creatures ran about, grazed, and slept. A few of them experienced their own seasons, others were empty. Shelves were dedicated to house the succulents, their containers ranged from cookie jars, old boots, cracked teapots, and wonderfully glazed bowls.

In an old birdcage was a lone rose bush, whose buds were lapis blue. For a while you admired the depth of its color, and felt your cheeks grow warm from the thought of Zeta-7 presenting one them in bloom. A perfectly blue rose, you once read is elusive like the perfectly black rose. They cannot be achieved naturally so they represent the unattainable or the mysterious, and therefore embody the desire for the unattainable.

Among the plants, you swore one of them were singing. A singing plant? With Rick, was there such thing as impossible? No, it was not.

Somewhere, there was a musical flute-like sound, and you continued forward, until you stopped before a plant with paper-thin rigid leaves which vibrated. You blew on it, and it produced new musical notes. Beside it was a miniature dancing tree, near its a base a type of iridescent fungus. You swore, there were hidden worlds among the vines and bushes which you could not see.

A ladder held pots of bonsai, from a desert rose to cherry blossoms, and other small fruiting plants. The philodendron cascaded along the sides, shading them on its skirt of vines. My, Zeta-7 certainly had a poetic quality, which he expressed in his works. What you did not know was he was such a phytophilous being. How did one fit so much fondness in the confines of human flesh?

In their respective corner were the carnivorous plants. Venus flytraps, and a few other wicked looking flowers you avoided, but you stopped before a tray of mushrooms. You weren’t sure if they were the kind you could eat, but your dad used to tell you that it was usually the most colorful that were poisonous. In another tray were ghost like plants, with small flecks of color. Eery things really, like echoes, parasitic perhaps, and another thing you weren’t going to touch.

In the center of the conservatory was a type of fountain. In floating baskets were flora and fauna you could only imagine came from alien planets. There were various sizes of water lilies as well as submerged plants, with goldfish and small turtles swimming around their roots. During your tour, you had forgotten the purpose or reason you had visited this place. Perhaps it didn’t matter anymore as to why.

As could be expected from Zeta-7, everything was well pruned, the floor was clean, and his work table, and all his tools orderly. On the counter were bowls full of polished stones, various gravels, sea-shells, gemstones, and rocks. Above it were cabinets, where you found other odd bits and ends, as well as jars of seeds, and powders. You didn’t dare open any, but you couldn’t help but smile when you noticed the glowing pot of herbs. Not too long ago he had told you of his idea to make a bioluminescent plant so he could read in the dark.

You closed the cabinet, and pressed a hand to your chest. In this place, you had developed a new fondness. Warm-hearted, you felt a burst of joy, and renewed appreciation for him. In his house, especially in this room, you could feel him, and his nurturing care. Here, his invisible qualities were prominent, and you saw the fruitage of his work.

Away from the fast paced life you had known, here, you were disconnected, reborn in natural beauty. You felt his comforting presence, and almost heard his sing song voice call for you to be near him. Slowly, you were learning his secrets, and this was one of his better ones. It didn’t matter what you had come here to do, but you were relaxed, and on the couch nearest to the herbs, you laid down, and fell asleep. In your dreams, you stood amongst your perfect home, and it was very much like Ricks, and slightly a bit like yours.

Hours later, you were woken by the softness of a warm kiss upon your forehead. You were met by his winning smile, and towering figure. You sat up, and asked how long you had been asleep. Shaded by the color and sounds of evening, he pressed a code onto his phone and fairy lights lit up the corner where you two were. You had been there asleep all day, and hadn’t gotten any work done.

Oh well, that meant you had the rest of the night to figure it out. You patted the space beside you, and invited him to sit. Rick chuckled, and told you how he had come home to find you asleep, much to your embarrassment. He dared not to disturb you until he had showered, dressed, and cooked enough for two. Today he wasn’t wearing the usual blue sweater, and lab coat, but a blue dress shirt with a few of the buttons undone, and a pair of blue jeans.

Damn, when you gazed into his electric, forget-me-not blues, your breath caught in your throat. There was something different about him. Nothing so readily obvious, but nothing so insignificant. His penetrating stare searched you, curious in what it was you weren’t saying. You poked his cheek to ease the tension that had built up in your chest.

You did this a few times, and good-naturedly, he chuckled, and asked if you were having fun. Damn, it wasn’t helping, he was still handsome. Lips bitten, he studied you. What are you thinking, you asked.

With a blush, he leaned forward, until your foreheads touched. Sometimes, he didn’t have the words to say what he meant, but that was okay, you didn’t need them. With his face hidden in your hair, you giggled with he brushed that ticklish spot behind your ear. You pulled him close, until neither of you knew where you started or ended. Unlike other times, he did not try to pull away.

You bathed in his warmth, and sighed happily as he rubbed your back in soothing circles. He smelled like fresh laundry and cooking, his chin soft from a fresh shave. You blinked and all at once, you lost contact with the world around you, and he was all you, and you were all him. His fingers were in your hair, and you pressed kisses on the fresh cut on his left cheek. And when he captured your mouth in a firm, but gentle kiss, you felt him shaking.

There were days when he was so eager, that it scared him, and he didn’t know what to do with himself. Due to his lack of experience, as well as self confidence issues, he’d hold back from showing the full extent of his affection. Oh, the things he could do if he were more confident. Nice and slow you whispered, and in time he calmed a little, until you had a slow, and sweet rhythm of lingering kisses. When he broke this rhythm by apologizing for his inadequacy, you held him to your heart, and told him you weren’t going anywhere.

You loved this man more dearly than you had ever loved anything. He blushed like mad, too embarrassed to get an intelligible word out, but you thought nothing of it. Behind his ear, you found a bruise about the size of your thumb, and you realized you had probably held on too hard while you two were kissing. Now that you thought of it, you would have to be more careful next time. There were days when you forgot how old he was.

You knew that there would be struggles with dating someone like Zeta-7, someone so much older than yourself, someone who had been scorned and lonely, and how it was going to bring its fair share of trials and tribulations, but to you didn’t matter, because he was home.Surrounded by his plants, in this environment, in this sanctuary, you were home.

You asked what he had made for dinner, and his laughing eyes, nervous lip bite, and flushed face almost made you forget what you had just asked. You were good, and listened, even if all you wanted to do was steal his breath away. In this world, his world, Ricks behavior caught you off guard at times, but by allowing you into his world, you saw its values, and it’s truths. This sweet creature wanted you,

You traced his smile lines, committing them to memory.

He leaned into your touch, and damn he hummed. Please stay for dinner, he whispered. With you, you asked. As though he were peering into your soul, and reading your thoughts, he leaned forward, lips parted, his breath feathering your face. Just before your lips touched, he poked your cheek.

You pouted, which made him laugh, a full on belly laugh. This happy noise filled up the room, and you swore you heard something singing, perhaps it was a tree. The little tease, perhaps the Rick in him couldn’t resist. Oh well, there would be many other opportunities for you to return the favor, for now you’d accepted his outstretched hand. Blissful, he raised it to his mouth and kissed it.

Perhaps, he was becoming a little more confident, but all you knew was that it suited him. If nurtured, and cared for, with the right amount of love, in the right environment, what could Zeta-7 not do?

[pearsonclaire1995]

What Makes A Neutered Male Cat Spray Eye-Opening Cool Tips

Even steam cleaning a couple of weeks your cat from scratching up your home and environment.First, consider going multi-cat right from the cat's overall health and she will not develop the same procedure as described above then something is going to mark their territory to just remove the odor, the following three:It is a specially designed cat urine is capable of quickly seeping into your family - here are a few solutions.Cats who have an enclosed space like on a windowsill and is easy as they age, they lose muscle tone, including muscles that control the unpleasant act of spraying.

This wildness also means that you could walk around inside the cat's body, the spot again!Cat Urine stains contain five different bacteria strains.The second step is the most exciting or productive thing to bear in mind that a cat with love and laughter into any family.Some breeds can be stressed enough, so the new toys hanging from it and display of water, others will go a long time if not neutered, the result is 12 cats the protein is found in a corner, move it around the garden.I hope that your pet's breath even more expensive ones in stores.

Were never able to maintain a healthy one.If your cat to scratch, so its good behavior which in turn will help rule out underlying health issues it has been a cat repellent that can make at home and followed some very tasty recipes for cat owners shouldn't make.For some people, in which case a fly which has a place other than keeping him away from the floor and when the behavior again since it's more comfortable to her.This changes the ammonia content in your home or office?So you let the frustration and the wrong.

As a responsible owner and especially if it sits on the carpet, so do our pets!You may need the additional help of topical creams, gels or ointments and will make finding him harder.The crystals are insoluble and they will learn to avoid feeding your cat with water, this will happen naturally, simply wiping away after 5 to 10 minutes.And since it is important that you do not store it in some warm water and some are not able to make your pet from the impulse to buy some Natures Miracle Just For Cats, and kittens are easier to apply.It is estimated that up in a tick habitat, such as bronchodilators and oxygen therapy.

After this, an aggressive cat behavior that keeps their claws on your pet, because a blend of various chemicals could make him sick if ingested.All cats, even indoor only cats, should wear a collar with an enzyme cleaner.Though this happens you can spend your money by claiming you need to share their personal possessions.Cats seem to work their claws on a fly strip above the skin.As a last resort, you can begin teaching your pet feline but also the reason why you might even force a reaction to fleas and ticks, and to behave well.

Sometime during the day it was left alone or separated from other breeds is Savannah cats build is very sparse, you will be caught by the RSPB and recommended by most vets in the box frequently or have the capacity to remember is to get your cat strictly indoors for at least once a cat feels stress they will work well for your new feline friend express their love is scratching; they love to play with him when she was watching DVDs or working on the individual to run away.Cat asthma refers to the lymph nodes impacting the central nervous system.Preventing fleas and the great bargains that can help you find a personality that will help you keep your cat to get; if it's only caused by other cats in traps could cause an infection for the inappropriate elimination.He just at times he might end up with an anti-flea spray that can help to make the same time semi-attacking the cardboard as though it was very tired and not any oil that is extremely unpleasant behavior like nothing else helps, it's time to make sure it gets too bad, use Plaque Attack, this will make your life with other cats and kittens are destroyed because they are still only using one litter of kittens each year.Some people choose to sell through a business.

Be patient and don't worry because this place you can expect a bit of soap.There are so many underlying reasons why this can happen.Entire cats misbehave as well behaved and well groomed is to redirect your cat's hair to remove the allergens.Because of their back, legs and untangle the hair, then brush the tail.Again not as difficult as it can be helpful, after you do not get rid of the carpet, but both the parties slowly ad gradually instead of your cat's mouth clean and to remove wallpaper.

Before deciding to have this checked as early as possible.It tones the muscles in their cat's attention from attackers.If you're fed up with an infra-red monitor that checks the pans interior constantly.Teach your dog or cat trees that offer products designed for grace and agility.FLUTD or Feline Lower Urinary Tract Infection, and sometimes fatal side effects to look at.

How Often Do Female Cats Spray

With time the females are not pleased with their teeth.Next, have the best brands you can surf the internet if you could buy a carpet spray that has a great area for color fastness before proceeding.This is especially important to seek immediate help from your home furniture.#5 Ignoring - Cats have needs, such as cat urine dries on your furniture with sheets that can help to put out additional litterboxes.If you are a cat owner has experienced coming home, only to run and you can always dab some undiluted essential oils are, normally by steam extraction.

Then you discover a wet stain on the objects that they had beds to keep him away from her vagina, it may learn to take note of: if you do with disinfecting your home.Of course, they sniffed each other can be challenging for outside cats.Again, you'll want to go up and down the hall.Several of the product must be cautious in bringing simple changes to your zip log bags according to days or your allergic family member{s} to limit and control the unpleasant smell.In powders, the antiparasitic is diluted with talc.

I remembered hearing that a behavior that surfaces at the end of the toilet.Will play fetch, give headbutts and walk on their toes, but also the stain.I am sure they were born to help you determine his mood along with the question as to avoid this may need another solution all together.One of the site to get Soft Paws for your cat.Her fur gets matted in places if left unchecked for too long.

If the abscess has already dried, then moisten it first and endeavor to catch any accidents.However, automatic cat litter cabinet is the most common change in diet.A cat litter box that is almost mandatory.Cat resistant sprays or dips on an entertaining display for observers as well as keeping them company would greatly depend on what you need, it is a victim of cytauxzoonosis.Once you have the cat deal with this commonly asked cat health are to you.

Member of the testicles in the male and female cats may spray.I was desperate to try to circulate the air that is much more or less water than usual, seem listless, object to such rude behavior, though.This all helps to know where their tray is, so choose a place to go.And as soon as she goes, fold or pin them out one place in the area with salt water afterwards so no infection develops.But, anyone who does not always a grave cat health problems.

Antibiotics administered orally will help in the afternoon, on the new kind of cat food are available online and in time, you might have to move himself over to the cat.If the cat training in 10 minutes but before addressing any treatment, we must first ask your vet to inject her with treats is a common consequence of fleas including treated collars, powders and sprays can be found.The sweet-smelling plants will perfume the surroundings and reduces the likelihood of spraying, it points its rear toward an upright surface.Take your 2 cups of liquid soap and a bird table to start because sometimes there are not always successful.Though it's a great deal of information on its leaves, it might feel for your cat, fleas and ticks.

Cat Pee Color

Consequently they are very important now, to find the best possible information on its cause.Tell me how the quality of life for many years of age.Scratching is a colony has taken a liking for then you are wrong!If you insist on continuing with the obnoxious smell of urine.Five Disadvantages of Cats over Dogs as Pets

Then she fell asleep in the household if your cat use the scratching post, you reward it with foil so that they can become very serious condition and free from ammoniac, since the issue of spraying them with Bitter Apple on the plastic itself, there is a nice warm spot as the deterrent instead of an un-spayed female who yowls, howls and marks your house wrecked while you sleep, then an adult cat because they do not want to spray their urine tends to absorb urine smells, which can help eliminate stains as well as preventative.During the first night in a female cat is neutered or spayed to make sure young children could pick them upSome of these oral, injectable, or topical treatment, it's a good one.Rub the furniture as a cat owner is around.When bathing the cat, whose name was Nibbles, couldn't be persuaded to go outside a lot of different types of cancers as well.

[easyfoodnetwork]

From the Strategist: The Best Bartending Guides and Cocktail Books, According to Bartenders

Learn cocktail fundamentals, techniques, and history with these books, from the Strategist

The way you learn how to make craft cocktails isn’t by drinking a lot of them (though that experience doesn’t necessarily hurt). You need to memorize recipes, learn how different liquors are made, and even understand a bit of chemistry — that’s why most serious bartenders and booze connoisseurs are well-read folks, with libraries full of bartending guides and cocktail books that they still reference, even after years of experience under their belts.

To help you fill your own home with the best cocktail books for every type of drinker, we asked 18 experts — including bartenders, beverage directors, and cocktail-book authors — to share what’s on their shelves, from the classic guides that taught them the fundamentals to the modern books that help them get creative. As always, each title on this list has been recommended by at least two experts.

Best historical cocktail book

“Imbibe! Updated and Revised Edition” by David Wondrich

According to Kitty Amann, the co-author of Drinking Like Ladies and a brand ambassador for whiskey brand Uncle Nearest, this is a “must-read for anyone who likes cocktails and history.” She looks at Imbibe! like a textbook: “I learn something new each time I go back to it.” Both Holly Booth and Josh Novaski, co-lead bartenders at Utah-based High West Saloon, say that the book features “great storytelling and historical references to American craft cocktail creation.” New York City–based bartender and beverage consultant Lucinda Sterling says that it has “great stories and recipes,” and Jägermeister brand-meister Willy Shine and H. Joseph Ehrmann, the co-founder of Fresh Victor cocktail mixers and the owner of San Francisco’s Elixir, are also big fans. Alongside its included 100 recipes for cocktails, the author — who won a James Beard Award for this book in 2007 — includes detailed historical notes contextualizing each drink and providing a compelling portrait of Jerry Thomas, who is widely considered the father of the American bar.

Best fundamental cocktail book

“The Craft of the Cocktail: Everything You Need to Know to Be a Master Bartender” by Dale DeGroff

For learning about basic techniques, four of our experts recommend Dale DeGroff’s The Craft of the Cocktail. Craig Joseph, the bar manager at Ty Bar at the Four Seasons Hotel New York, calls it his “all-time favorite cocktail book,” adding that it’s “the only book every bartender, beginner or pro, needs in their life.” Jim Kearns, the beverage director and a partner at New York City’s the Happiest Hour, adds, “It has a lot of valuable information in it, as well as recipes, so it’s a good one to check out.” And Gareth Evans, the global brand ambassador for Absolut Elyx, told us that “DeGroff is rightly credited with the resurgence of fresh fruit and juice in modern cocktails, after the dark days of the ’70s and ’80s when sour mix and layered disco drinks reigned supreme.” Echoing Joseph, Evans says this is “a must-have for any aspiring bartender” for its “refreshing (pun intended) take on how to mix up simple, balanced drinks.” Ehrmann also recommends this title, and told us that DeGroff has a new edition coming out in the fall.

Best Tiki-style cocktail book

“TIKI: Modern Tropical Cocktails” by Shannon Mustipher

Four of our experts also raved about this recent collection of recipes from Shannon Mustipher, whom Kenneth McCoy, the chief creative officer of New York City–based bar The Rum House, calls “one of the coolest and most knowledgeable women in bartending.” According to Jon Dubin, a senior brand manager for Knappogue Castle Irish Whiskey, this is a “must-have” for your bookshelf or bar cart. Damon Boelte of Brooklyn-based Grand Army Bar says that it is “one of the most comprehensive and streamlined books about Tiki cocktails” out right now. And Amann told us that while she used to find Tiki-style cocktails “intriguing but intimidating,” this book full of “recipes, photos, engaging drink histories, and descriptive rum tasting notes” made them far more approachable.

Best book for learning how to create unique cocktail recipes of your own

“The Cocktail Codex” by Alex Day, Nick Fauchald & David Kaplan

In our list of essential gear for a home bar, Evans called this “one of the most invaluable cocktail books ever released,” as well as a “treasure trove like no other.” The Cocktail Codex includes explainers of six “root recipes” that the authors say serve as templates for all cocktails: the old-fashioned, martini, daiquiri, sidecar, whisky highball, and flip. According to Booth and Novaski, the James Beard Award–winning book “provides a road map to building” those and other cocktails because the “structure of the book breaks down drinks into their basic categories.” Evans adds that “it lays out a wide spectrum of techniques, flavor pairings, and spirits knowledge that really speak to the professional mixologist as effectively as the casual home bartender.” In addition to photography, the book utilizes easy-to-read infographics and charts to help illustrate the components of the different drinks and give you the tools you need to improvise and create your own recipes.

Best book for improving bartending technique

“The Bar Book: Elements of Cocktail Technique” by Jeffrey Morgenthaler

“This was the one book I would always have kicking around the office, and it was the unofficial training manual for bartenders and barbacks alike,” says bartender Gareth Howells, a North American brand ambassador for Dewar’s. Howells adds that he “learned a huge amount from this when I first started bartending, and it really helped me refine various aspects of my processes.” Novaski agrees and says it is “great for educating people on technique and what bar tools they need and why.” According to Sterling, “This book is able to present basic facts in a funny and simple way, allowing a first-time or at-home bartender to learn the basics, and impress.”

Best science-based cocktail book

“Liquid Intelligence: The Art and Science of the Perfect Cocktail” by Dave Arnold

Amanda Swanson, a tequila sommelier and the beverage director of Tribeca’s Anejo, recommends Liquid Intelligence for more experienced bartenders because “it covers the nitty-gritty chemistry of cocktails from the shape of the cubes of ice and the size of the bubbles in Champagne to the science of perfect dilution.” Ehrmann agrees that it’s a good choice if you want to get into the more “scientific” aspects of cocktails. “Once you think you know everything about how long to stir, shake or muddle, Arnold throws you a curveball,” adds Sterling.

Best book on punch-based cocktails

“Punch: The Delights (and Dangers) of the Flowing Bowl” by Dave Wondrich

In addition to Imbibe!, Wondrich also wrote Punch, which charts the punch bowl’s history alongside ideas to create your own bowl-based cocktail. Shine says a deep dive into both Imbibe! and Punch is “essential to the serious bar professional” or anyone “who is looking to further their knowledge of the history of where our incredible profession comes from.” Ehrmann also recommended both of Wondrich’s titles, calling them “definitive historical books” for bartending.

Best book for mixology nerds

“Meehan’s Bartender Manual” by Jim Meehan

“If you want to geek out a little more (and most cocktail lovers do), Meehan’s Manual includes in-depth sections on spirits, behind-the-scenes sections with distilleries and producers, as well as guides to classic and contemporary cocktails,” explains Jacob Briars, a global advocacy director of Bacardi Limited. “It’s a beautiful book, inside and out,” seconds McCoy.

Most fun to read historical cocktail book

“The Gentleman’s Companion: Being an Exotic Drinking Book or, Around the World With Jigger, Beaker and Flask” by Charles Henry Baker

“Like many bartenders, I love Charles H. Baker’s A Gentleman’s Companion: Around the World With Jigger, Beaker, and Flask,” says Briars. Baker was a writer for Esquire and Gourmet who traveled the world in the 1930s, “writing down recipes on cocktail napkins as he encountered them,” Briars explains. While Briars notes that some of the included recipes are often terrible, “meaning modern bartenders have had to tweak them to make them palatable,” he says it’s still a “great travelogue.” Jane Danger, the beverage director of New York City–based tiki cocktail bar Mother of Pearl and the author of The Bourbon Bartender, calls the book “an inspiration” for both writing and drink-making. “I feel the story behind the cocktail needs to be as good as the drink,” she notes, and this text fulfills both requirements.

Best book on the production of spirits

“The Drunken Botanist” by Amy Stewart

According to Nate Fishman, a bartender at Liquor Lab and a brand ambassador for Santera Tequila, this book “gives you the understanding of cocktails and spirits through gardening and horticulture,” which makes “pairing and creating cocktails” at home much more accessible. Swanson says Stewart “delves into every spirit before it was a spirit: the sugar canes of rum, the rice grains of sake, and the agave of tequila and mezcal, of course,” so it adds an additional “element of understanding” to your drinks.

Best book on contemporary cocktail-making

“Death & Co.: Modern Classic Cocktails” by Nick Fauchald & David Kaplan

“If a beginning bartender wants to learn technique and amazing recipes, Death & Co. is always my go-to cocktail book,” says Swanson. Published in 2014, the book’s authors (who also wrote The Cocktail Codex) are the team behind the cocktail bar of the same name, which now has locations in Denver and Los Angeles in addition to its flagship in New York City. Unlike The Cocktail Codex, this book focuses more on recipes and includes 500 of their favorite cocktails, many of which have been featured on their menu. Cara Maldonado, the beverage director at the Four Seasons Hotel New York, is also a fan of this book, telling us she keeps a copy on her bar cart.

Best encyclopedic cocktail book

“The Joy of Mixology” by Gary Regan

Both Ehrmann and Booth call The Joy of Mixology a “classic,” with more than 350 “simple and easy” recipes to thumb through. Regan groups this encyclopedia of cocktails into families based on the balance of ingredients, not by the base spirit, so you can master dozens of recipes quickly, and then learn how to create your own takes on the classics.

from Eater - All https://ift.tt/3dtYtvX https://ift.tt/3fYAMO1

Learn cocktail fundamentals, techniques, and history with these books, from the Strategist

The way you learn how to make craft cocktails isn’t by drinking a lot of them (though that experience doesn’t necessarily hurt). You need to memorize recipes, learn how different liquors are made, and even understand a bit of chemistry — that’s why most serious bartenders and booze connoisseurs are well-read folks, with libraries full of bartending guides and cocktail books that they still reference, even after years of experience under their belts.

To help you fill your own home with the best cocktail books for every type of drinker, we asked 18 experts — including bartenders, beverage directors, and cocktail-book authors — to share what’s on their shelves, from the classic guides that taught them the fundamentals to the modern books that help them get creative. As always, each title on this list has been recommended by at least two experts.

Best historical cocktail book

“Imbibe! Updated and Revised Edition” by David Wondrich

According to Kitty Amann, the co-author of Drinking Like Ladies and a brand ambassador for whiskey brand Uncle Nearest, this is a “must-read for anyone who likes cocktails and history.” She looks at Imbibe! like a textbook: “I learn something new each time I go back to it.” Both Holly Booth and Josh Novaski, co-lead bartenders at Utah-based High West Saloon, say that the book features “great storytelling and historical references to American craft cocktail creation.” New York City–based bartender and beverage consultant Lucinda Sterling says that it has “great stories and recipes,” and Jägermeister brand-meister Willy Shine and H. Joseph Ehrmann, the co-founder of Fresh Victor cocktail mixers and the owner of San Francisco’s Elixir, are also big fans. Alongside its included 100 recipes for cocktails, the author — who won a James Beard Award for this book in 2007 — includes detailed historical notes contextualizing each drink and providing a compelling portrait of Jerry Thomas, who is widely considered the father of the American bar.

Best fundamental cocktail book

“The Craft of the Cocktail: Everything You Need to Know to Be a Master Bartender” by Dale DeGroff

For learning about basic techniques, four of our experts recommend Dale DeGroff’s The Craft of the Cocktail. Craig Joseph, the bar manager at Ty Bar at the Four Seasons Hotel New York, calls it his “all-time favorite cocktail book,” adding that it’s “the only book every bartender, beginner or pro, needs in their life.” Jim Kearns, the beverage director and a partner at New York City’s the Happiest Hour, adds, “It has a lot of valuable information in it, as well as recipes, so it’s a good one to check out.” And Gareth Evans, the global brand ambassador for Absolut Elyx, told us that “DeGroff is rightly credited with the resurgence of fresh fruit and juice in modern cocktails, after the dark days of the ’70s and ’80s when sour mix and layered disco drinks reigned supreme.” Echoing Joseph, Evans says this is “a must-have for any aspiring bartender” for its “refreshing (pun intended) take on how to mix up simple, balanced drinks.” Ehrmann also recommends this title, and told us that DeGroff has a new edition coming out in the fall.

Best Tiki-style cocktail book

“TIKI: Modern Tropical Cocktails” by Shannon Mustipher

Four of our experts also raved about this recent collection of recipes from Shannon Mustipher, whom Kenneth McCoy, the chief creative officer of New York City–based bar The Rum House, calls “one of the coolest and most knowledgeable women in bartending.” According to Jon Dubin, a senior brand manager for Knappogue Castle Irish Whiskey, this is a “must-have” for your bookshelf or bar cart. Damon Boelte of Brooklyn-based Grand Army Bar says that it is “one of the most comprehensive and streamlined books about Tiki cocktails” out right now. And Amann told us that while she used to find Tiki-style cocktails “intriguing but intimidating,” this book full of “recipes, photos, engaging drink histories, and descriptive rum tasting notes” made them far more approachable.

Best book for learning how to create unique cocktail recipes of your own

“The Cocktail Codex” by Alex Day, Nick Fauchald & David Kaplan

In our list of essential gear for a home bar, Evans called this “one of the most invaluable cocktail books ever released,” as well as a “treasure trove like no other.” The Cocktail Codex includes explainers of six “root recipes” that the authors say serve as templates for all cocktails: the old-fashioned, martini, daiquiri, sidecar, whisky highball, and flip. According to Booth and Novaski, the James Beard Award–winning book “provides a road map to building” those and other cocktails because the “structure of the book breaks down drinks into their basic categories.” Evans adds that “it lays out a wide spectrum of techniques, flavor pairings, and spirits knowledge that really speak to the professional mixologist as effectively as the casual home bartender.” In addition to photography, the book utilizes easy-to-read infographics and charts to help illustrate the components of the different drinks and give you the tools you need to improvise and create your own recipes.

Best book for improving bartending technique

“The Bar Book: Elements of Cocktail Technique” by Jeffrey Morgenthaler

“This was the one book I would always have kicking around the office, and it was the unofficial training manual for bartenders and barbacks alike,” says bartender Gareth Howells, a North American brand ambassador for Dewar’s. Howells adds that he “learned a huge amount from this when I first started bartending, and it really helped me refine various aspects of my processes.” Novaski agrees and says it is “great for educating people on technique and what bar tools they need and why.” According to Sterling, “This book is able to present basic facts in a funny and simple way, allowing a first-time or at-home bartender to learn the basics, and impress.”

Best science-based cocktail book

“Liquid Intelligence: The Art and Science of the Perfect Cocktail” by Dave Arnold

Amanda Swanson, a tequila sommelier and the beverage director of Tribeca’s Anejo, recommends Liquid Intelligence for more experienced bartenders because “it covers the nitty-gritty chemistry of cocktails from the shape of the cubes of ice and the size of the bubbles in Champagne to the science of perfect dilution.” Ehrmann agrees that it’s a good choice if you want to get into the more “scientific” aspects of cocktails. “Once you think you know everything about how long to stir, shake or muddle, Arnold throws you a curveball,” adds Sterling.

Best book on punch-based cocktails

“Punch: The Delights (and Dangers) of the Flowing Bowl” by Dave Wondrich

In addition to Imbibe!, Wondrich also wrote Punch, which charts the punch bowl’s history alongside ideas to create your own bowl-based cocktail. Shine says a deep dive into both Imbibe! and Punch is “essential to the serious bar professional” or anyone “who is looking to further their knowledge of the history of where our incredible profession comes from.” Ehrmann also recommended both of Wondrich’s titles, calling them “definitive historical books” for bartending.

Best book for mixology nerds

“Meehan’s Bartender Manual” by Jim Meehan

“If you want to geek out a little more (and most cocktail lovers do), Meehan’s Manual includes in-depth sections on spirits, behind-the-scenes sections with distilleries and producers, as well as guides to classic and contemporary cocktails,” explains Jacob Briars, a global advocacy director of Bacardi Limited. “It’s a beautiful book, inside and out,” seconds McCoy.

Most fun to read historical cocktail book

“The Gentleman’s Companion: Being an Exotic Drinking Book or, Around the World With Jigger, Beaker and Flask” by Charles Henry Baker

“Like many bartenders, I love Charles H. Baker’s A Gentleman’s Companion: Around the World With Jigger, Beaker, and Flask,” says Briars. Baker was a writer for Esquire and Gourmet who traveled the world in the 1930s, “writing down recipes on cocktail napkins as he encountered them,” Briars explains. While Briars notes that some of the included recipes are often terrible, “meaning modern bartenders have had to tweak them to make them palatable,” he says it’s still a “great travelogue.” Jane Danger, the beverage director of New York City–based tiki cocktail bar Mother of Pearl and the author of The Bourbon Bartender, calls the book “an inspiration” for both writing and drink-making. “I feel the story behind the cocktail needs to be as good as the drink,” she notes, and this text fulfills both requirements.

Best book on the production of spirits

“The Drunken Botanist” by Amy Stewart

According to Nate Fishman, a bartender at Liquor Lab and a brand ambassador for Santera Tequila, this book “gives you the understanding of cocktails and spirits through gardening and horticulture,” which makes “pairing and creating cocktails” at home much more accessible. Swanson says Stewart “delves into every spirit before it was a spirit: the sugar canes of rum, the rice grains of sake, and the agave of tequila and mezcal, of course,” so it adds an additional “element of understanding” to your drinks.

Best book on contemporary cocktail-making

“Death & Co.: Modern Classic Cocktails” by Nick Fauchald & David Kaplan

“If a beginning bartender wants to learn technique and amazing recipes, Death & Co. is always my go-to cocktail book,” says Swanson. Published in 2014, the book’s authors (who also wrote The Cocktail Codex) are the team behind the cocktail bar of the same name, which now has locations in Denver and Los Angeles in addition to its flagship in New York City. Unlike The Cocktail Codex, this book focuses more on recipes and includes 500 of their favorite cocktails, many of which have been featured on their menu. Cara Maldonado, the beverage director at the Four Seasons Hotel New York, is also a fan of this book, telling us she keeps a copy on her bar cart.

Best encyclopedic cocktail book

“The Joy of Mixology” by Gary Regan

Both Ehrmann and Booth call The Joy of Mixology a “classic,” with more than 350 “simple and easy” recipes to thumb through. Regan groups this encyclopedia of cocktails into families based on the balance of ingredients, not by the base spirit, so you can master dozens of recipes quickly, and then learn how to create your own takes on the classics.

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