#of letting kris name buddy

[evanture]

tried to make suselle fankids their names are [takes a deep breath] their names are buddy and holly.

[sofasoap]

Sofasoap's Call of Duty Fic Rec

Always wanted to make a list of my very subjective CoD fic rec list, and also I promised my good buddy @groguspicklejar ( famous author of Beloved series) a list of fic recs, let me list some of my beautiful mutual's and some amazing writers and artists so they can go binge read.

Edit : I'll keep adding artist/writers on as I go. When my brain cells is functioning.

@saltofmercury -Let's start off with the mother of my Mini MacTavish. The one who made me fell in love and hit the nail in the coffin for CoD fandom.

If you are into König, her " Break-in" series is a must read. check out her Soap fics too :) Masterlist

@floral-force - My bestie! delicious Simon/Ghost fics.

American Hospitality is my favourite. Or honeypot is guarantee making you crave for more :)

Check out their Mando fics too :)

@a-small-writer-in-a-big-world - You want slow burn? check out lovely Bear's "The Roommate Series". Wonderful progression of relationship between Simon and his room mate. Your Friendly Neighbor Soap and Shy reader, OH SO CUTE.

@deadbranch - Spy and Cold war style fics? You are in the right place. The killing moon and Dying sun series. Gut wrenching.

or check out the light hearted None Taken ( personal favourite!), threesome fics? Goth style Reader? Check out their MASTERLIST for full list of goodies.

@brewed-pangolin The president of "Soap Squad" club.

Fireside Whiskey - personal favourite. Soft and thoughtful Soap is just heaven. Kati's page is full of wonderful Soap deliciousness. check it out if you want some Soap fun.

@writeforfandoms  - Jen jen jen jen jen. Multifandom talent. AU Prodigy. But let's focus on the CoD here, Puppy Love - Price and puppy? can't go wrong with that. Born for Greatness and Howlin' For You Shifter!AU is my latest obsession here.

@random-thot-generator - Kris, The princess of Thotland and Thotlandia. Their latest work: A Patient Man - had me all hot and bothered. Sweet sweet Rudy. OH how can you be so sexy.

@jynxmirage, Jynx!!!! the one I blame for falling into Top Gun fandom. but that's not the point :P

Communication is Key - my current obsession :) Soft caring Price, oh give me this Captain price any day...

@as-is-above-so-below  - Oh Gezez, Simon X OC ( Freya ) fic The Captain is utterly brilliant. Angst, suspension, Thirst, smut... you name it, you get it.

@roosterr - my Fellow Nikolai fanatic, check out her "guardian angel"

series, action action action and of course, love story :)

@siilvan - another one of my fellow Nikolai fanatic, Aqua Regia

series , Nikolai the flirt, sexy flirt , complete with smut * smirk *

@homicidal-slvt - How can I forget the spark to my Lastochka series?

and one of my biggest supporter.

Check out their creative CoD Headcanons and full list of CoD works that will guarantee satisfaction.

@nrdmssgs - to round off my Nikolai fanatic club , and also brilliant artist, A heart full of pity series is one of my latest obsession featuring good old Nikolai.

@captainpriceslover - my crack fic inspo buddy ( miss you a lot!!!). the one gifted me ideas of Soap dispensers lol.

aiaigasa (相合傘) - featuring our TF141 sweet boy, Gaz, had my heart melting.

@starstruckmiraclekitty  - You want H/C and scenarios? * falling out of the bag * here is the place to go. :)

@random0lover - you want soft fluffy Soap? Hot Chocolate & Hoodies, you want angsty type of story? Open Wounds and War Paint

you get all with Kat!!!

@lethalchiralium , how can I forget Keri! ( I knew I forgot someone.. argh )

@namedlunagoddess - another 3Drender goddess. OH CHECK OUT HER Sowa Team fic if you are into Gromsko, its HOT SMUTTY DELICIOUS FIC.

The Happiness series, don’t let the title fool ya (well it does bring you happiness reading such talented writing) this story is like washing machine, throws your emotions all over the place, let you grip onto your chair, wanting more.

@mistydeyes so many awesome stories to choose from! My current favourite is "choose your flowers, carefully" Good old Gaz x reader story, and one of my favourite trope - childhood to lovers 🥺 please go check it out!

Now , Some brilliant artists:

@shkretart - This utterly utterly talented person, Price and Nikolai and Simon, will have your nose bleeding within 0.1 seconds.

@ave661 - out of this world 3Drenders always have my eyes popping out of the socket.

@nrdmssgs - mentioned once, should mention again, beautiful art :)

@wombywoo - TF141 boys in their dress uniform? YES PLEASE.

@loneghostwolf oh, another wonderful 3D render artist that bless us with wonderful food of the CoD boys

@hffhifjou - You want rugby boys? You get rugby boys :) and football. and all sort of deliciousness :)

@lululandd  - FROGGY CoD boys!!!!!!!! and wonderful fics too, please check THEM OUT MASTERLIST

I am sorry If I miss out anyone. after 13+ hours at work I am exhausted.

[mrchaosman]

The Angel VS The Demon

❤️: God, that day was tiring, I hope everything is nice and dandy-

(Suddenly, an green eye glows in the dark).

❤️: W...who's there?, show yourself.

????: OHHHH BOY, DO I EVEN HAVE A self TO SHOW ANYMORE?

HE EHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHAHAHAHAHAHAH.

How, DREADFUL of ME of introducing MESELF to YA.

(The eye getting closer, revealed to be a tall, black fured one-eyed darkner, he seem to wear a cowboy hat, a long green coat with a weird symbol on it).

HOWDY, I'M HARSHSI, THE SHERIFF OF THE SHADOWS.

AND YOU?, NEO BUDDY, WHAT'S THE NAME OF YOURS????!?!?!?.

❤️: ummm, I'm [insert the player's name] but, the people call me the Angel.

Harshsi: ANGEL, HUH?.

(Harshsi the heart symbol on Angel's Coat).

Harshsi:...

....

...You.

(Remembered AngelPlayer after His battle with them).

YOU,

YOU ARE THE ONE WHO FOUGHT ME...

YOU TOOK EVERYTHING AWAY FROM ME.

❤️: What do you mean I "took" everything from you?.

Harshsi: Ohhhhhhh, Ohhh I see NOWer.

Ha HA.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA

You, YOU DON'T REALISE anything, DO YOU?.

I'M KRISTAL'S HORNS, I was their ONE & ONLY friend.

TILL ONE DAY, this sorry excuse of a Church has ordered KRISTAL to Throw me OUT.

saying that I was a "DEMONIC INFLUENCE".

HEHEHEHEHEHEHE.

Then, I SPENT THE REST OF MY CHILDHOOD in the Dark~~~.

Away from my BROTHER

Have you EVER waited for what it looks like the eternity?.

HUH?.

Waiting the rest of the existence here, ALONE.

Days becomes weeks.

Weeks becomes Mouths.

Mouths becomes Years.

HEHEHEHEHEHEHEHHAHAHAHAHAHAH

HA HA AHAHAHAHAHEHEHE.

AND THE GODDAMN YEARS BECOMES AN ENTIRE DACETE.

I Lost ME since of self from that point.

My physical appearance slowly starts to get ROTTEN and ROTTEN with each passing day, GOT IT?.

I was wondering; how are my little brother are doing right now?

He might be scared?, FRIGHTENED, and possibly CONFUSED?.

when I was hoping that waiting is OVER.

And suddenly: my prayers has been answered by GOD.

A door has opened to ME.

A door to HEAVENS of the deepest pits of HELL.

A door to the desired FREEDOM.

A door to Y O U..

(Harshsi turn AngelPlayer into Green).

❤️: W-wait, we can solve this peacefully.

Harshsi: the AGE OF PEACEs is DIEd, as I died.

(He reloading his gun).

AND NOWWWWWWWW.

I Can BACK to be KRISTAL'S only FRIEND.

COME PALS, AREN'T YOU SUPPOSED TO FOLLOW THE RULES???!?!?!?.

But No matter how HARDER YOU TRIED

No matter HOW YOU WERE STRONGER.

Your CHOICES doesn't MATTER in this WORLD.

We are in a WORLD where we KILL OR BE KILLED.

Come on PAL, go CRY into the DARKER VOIDS AND YELLS: Susie, Ralsei, Kris, Noelle, Mom, and LET'S SEE WHAF GOOD DOES TO YOU.

(*i Called for Help)...

...

...

...

Harshsi: YET, NO ONE IS HERE.

That's a SHAME, ya KNOW????.

No one Has Came.

TO SEE ME TEAR YOUR BLOODY LIMBS, LIMB FROM LIMB .

Hahahahahahahahahahaahahahahaha.

(Angel Blocked Harshsi's attack).

💚: look, Dude, I'm Very sorry for you, and for everything that happened to you, but violence will never solve anything.

💚: I'm may have hurted a lot of people, but even if i did harmed them, I still gonna do the right thing.

💚: and I believe you can do the right thing too.

Just, put the gun down, and calm down, everything will be fine, I promise.

Harshsi (crying):...

...

I just... I just...

I Just wanted to see my brother back, I just wanted to have a friend.

Is that too much to ASK???.

...

(Harshsi change AngelPlayer to red again).

❤️: No, No, it isn't, well, ummm.

Ohh, I got it.

❤️: How about...

(I Hug Harshsi).

❤️: How about I be your friend?.

Harshsi: Really?, after all I did too you.

After I Tried to KILL you, you still want to MERCIFULLY ACT?.

❤️: I mean, Yeah, if you are OK with it?

(Harshsi hugged AngelPlayer back).

Harshsi m: YAYAYAYAYAYAYAY, I have a FRIEND, in sight me.

(A silent moment).

❤️: So ahhh.

❤️: Wanna mess around with Kris?.

Harshsi: Yeah why not?

Angel is by @marshiemonarch

Harshsi is by me

[mrsarcherofinfamy]

For his birthday ❤️

●Chuck Taylor x Reader●

Summary: Best Friends watch your son during your match. You see how good Chuck is with your son.

_________________________________________

"Kris please. Do you know anyone who can watch Blake during our match? I had to bring him along with me because my babysitter canceled last minute!"

I am holding onto Kris Statlander's arm while also holding my 3 year old son Blake and his bag begging her to help me.

"Ya know what? I have a group of guys that would help me anytime. Follow me!"

She grabs my hand and I follow next to her walking fast. She walks up to a locker room door and knocks.

"Who is it?!"

"It's Stat!"

"Oh come in."

The door opens and Trent lets us in. The guys start staring at me as I smile looking at them.

"Guys this is Y/N. Better known as (your wrestling name) and she needs someone to watch her son just during her match with me. Can you guys please watch him?"

"Please."

I look at them with puppy dog eyes. Chuck comes over and puts his arms out signaling for Blake to get in his arms. Blake pushes off of me and into Chuck's arms. I smile at him as he gets Blake comfy in his arms.

"Y/N right? From ROH?"

"Yeah I'm new. Kris suggested me to be her partner tonight to show off my skills to Tony."

I hand him Blake's bag as the other two men are staring at me. Kris grabs my arm and looks at the guys.

"We have to get going. See you afterwards."

"Thank you again!"

Kris drags me out of the room and out to gorilla.

_________________________________________

*Chuck's POV*

I sit down on the couch with Blake on my lap as Cassidy turns the TV on to watch Kris and Y/N's match. They are making their way to the ring and Blake points at the tv.

"Mommy!"

"Yeah that's mommy. Your mommy is beautiful dude."

"Chuck."

"What? I'm being serious. She is gorgeous."

Orange rolls his eyes at me and continues watching the TV. Blake watches Y/N wrestle and keeps clapping at the tv. I look at him smiling. He turns and looks at me.

"I hungry. Can get food?"

"Sure dude!"

I stand up holding him and walk out of the locker room heading to catering. I walk in with a few people in catering and walk over to the table.

"Whatcha want buddy?"

He points at some stuff he wants and I grab a plate putting some on it. I walk over to a table and set the plate down on the table than sit down on the chair with him on my lap. I help him eat when someone sits down at the table. I look up seeing MJF sitting across from me.

He points at Blake with his fork.

"Whose kid is that? I know it's not yours."

"This is Y/N's son."

Max starts choking on his food, takes a drink than looks at me.

"Wait... Y/N? The one tagging with Stat right now?"

"Yup."

"Oh crap."

I look at him confused but, he looks down continuing to eat his food ignoring me. I shake my head and help Blake keep eating his snacks.

_________________________________________

*Y/N POV*

Me and Kris are walking back to the Best Friends locker room with her arm around my neck.

"That was such a fun match! Thanks for being my partner Y/N!"

"Of course! Anytime!"

We walk into the locker room and I see that Chuck and Blake are missing.

"Ummm Cass, where is Chuck and Blake?"

"He went to catering because Blake was hungry."

"I'll see you guys later."

I run out of the locker room with Blake's bag and my bag. I walk into catering finding Blake sitting on Chuck's lap and Max sitting across from them. I walk up to Chuck setting the bags down next to the table not looking at Max.

"Hey guys! What are we eating?"

I pull the chair out next to Chuck and turn it to face them having my back to Max.

"Mommy!"

Blake puts his arms out and I take him from Chuck who is looking over at Max. I take a deep breath and look at Chuck with a smile pulling Blake's plate over to me.

"Chuck. Thank you for taking care of Blake for me. It means a lot. If there is anything I can do to repay you, let me know."

"Would you go on a date with me?"

"No she will not be."

I close my eyes hearing Max say that behind me and take a deep breath. I turn slightly looking at Max.

"I told you before to leave us alone. I am a grown woman. I can do whatever I want. And yes Chuck. We can go on a date."

"No you won't."

"Max."

"I am not letting you go on a date with him."

Max stands up looking at me and Blake. Chuck stands up looking at Max across the table.

"Why can't she go on a date with me, Max?"

"Because her and Blake are mine. That's my girlfriend. And that's my son."

I close my eyes taking a deep breath trying to talk calmly to Max so Blake doesn't freak out. Chuck is standing there with a shocked face.

"Max. I broke up with you because you decided to cheat on me. Three times. And yes this may be your son but when is the last time you saw him? Helped me out with him? Do you even know how old he is? You abandoned us because you didnt want us to ruin your career. Now look at us. I just had a great match on TV and Blake is being taken care of. Kris just introduced me to Chuck before my match and immediately Chuck got up, taking Blake, making sure he was taken care of. And that's why I will be going on a date with Chuck and not you."

Max looks at Chuck than at me, shakes his head and walks away. I look over at Chuck who has a big smile on his face as he sits back down.

"We can have a picnic and you can bring Blake! And than explain everything to me."

"That sounds like a perfect idea! Right Blake?"

Blake starts clapping his hands giggling. I smile and lean over trying to kiss Chuck's cheek. He turns his head and our lips collide in a romantic kiss. He pulls back looking at me and I smile looking back at him.

"I can't wait for that date."

"Me too."

[king-krisu]

JOKER OUT/KÄÄRIJÄ KINKTOBER PROMPT LIST

I'm so in love with kinktober and in case some writers are looking for inspo for certain prompts, here you go!

I'm gonna highlight the kinktober prompts in the suggestions so you can work out what prompt my ramblings can fit with lmao😮‍💨💀

Feel free to use any of these however you wish! Credits are nice but not necessary lol, just have at it:

JOKER OUT:

Kris should get his ass destroyed, it's not a want it's a need. Maybe something like Jan/Nace/Jure taking Kris from behind meanwhile Bojan chokes him and whispers some sweet nothing in his ear? We all saw how enthusiastically both of them were into the choking at Tavastia 🫵🏻😀

Nace getting tied up by Jan. Will not elaborate (Toys/Bondage)

Pretty, dolled up Bojan who get taken care of like the princess he is. Our model boy Kris can also be made pretty (Lingerie)

I'm so passionate about a Bojere sandwich with Jance, like Morbid said I need them to squash those boys like bugs (Threesome/Group)

Just someone please take care of Nace, okay? That man is not into pain just give him a good time 😔🫶🏻 (spoken like I know him lmao)

Sensory deprivation is pretty much always on a kinktober list, and maybe that could work with Kris? You know, stressed out lil man taken care of by whoever by shutting the outside world out? 🧍🏼‍♂️

Since exhibitionism is also usually on the lists, and we know that Bojan and Nace are gym buddies, maybe Nace could fuck some sense into Bojan in a gym locker room, barely hidden away? Preferably post-workout so they're sweaty 😀🫶🏻

Someone make Jance dp Bojan. Maybe spitroast him. Thanks. (Double penetration)

I mean "This guys is my puppy" Bojan would probably love some puppy/pet play

Perhaps Nace gets tired of one of the boys constantly coming up to him on stage asking for attention, and he gives them what they want and more? (Overstimulation)

Prev can also work as Nace getting tired and wanting good boys to wait (edging)

Bcs Jure and Nace met on tinder, I think anonymous sex works best for them (FOR THE LOVE OF CHRIST JURE CANNOT MEOW PLEASE)

KÄÄRIJÄ:

Bojan and Jere on the phone, with Bojan riding a pillow, pretending it's Jere's thigh or smth, and being desperate all the while Jere praises him over the phone? Yeah! :) (Phone sex/thigh riding)

Now obviously monsterfucking is very Käsh coded, either demon!Jere or Tommy, maybe vampires, maybe something else freaky in that gay forest in the ICIP mv?? Go wild

Y'all know I am a Nace/Jere enthusiast. I NEED a fic with Nace getting pissed off that Jere keeps forgetting his name etc, only to find out that it's just Jere's way of getting "Big big strong man" riled up. Maybe resulting in Nace then giving him more than he asked for. You can also include an annoyed boyfriend Jan here and make it dp lol (overstimulation/double penetration)

Now of course size queen Jere "any guys with big dicks here" Pöyhönen can work with any of the big boys, but especially Nace lolol (tho also that photo of Kris having to fold in half to meet Häärijä is also good inspo)

Edging would be funny with Tommy requiring Jere to stay quiet if we wants to cum lmao

I mean...... breeding with our mpreg king Jere works with anyone 🧍🏼‍♂️

I don't particularly care for the virginity tag BUT this could be used as a way for Jere to show Bojan a new kinkier side of sex like bondage, choking, roleplay etc?

Someone please put a ball gag on Jere good god he needs to shut the fuck up. You know he's a squirmy boy so tie him up too while you're at it

Speaking of shutting him up and even Jure also getting tired of his babbling, maybe Jure could shut Jere up by idk dragging him to the nearest supply closet and having his way with him just mere metres from the rest of the gang 😀 (exhibitionism)

Jere in lingerie!!!! Jere in pretty ruined makeup!!!!!!!! JERE IN A HARNESS!!!!!!

SOMEONE PLAY WITH JERE'S TITTIES. MAYBE THEY'RE PIERCED WHO KNOWS. Maybe Jere lets Bojan fuck his titties to give him atleast One (1) heterosexual fantasy in his life

Jere's strong af tongue pierced making Bojan go insane in whatever way you imagine 🫵🏻😎 maybe Tommy made him do it on a dare and he discovers it's a huge turn on for Bojan? :) maybe he eats him out and Bojan comes untouched WHO KNOWS THE WORLD IS YOUR OYSTER

Jere post-Tavastia (1 or 2) in a bathroom jerking off because whatever the fuck happened on stage was so hot and Bojan catches him? 🧎‍♂️ (masturbation/exhibitionism)

Okay that's all bye

[thesimquarter]

Some Unused Urbz (GBA) Dialogue

I was looking through the string table in the Urbz for GBA and noticed some dialogue that goes unused in the actual game and decided to catalogue it and share it because I just love things like this.

If you see an '@1', in the dialogue, that's just a placeholder for the player's name (or at least for all of THESE. Sometimes it's used for other things.)

As a side note, the dialogue for this game is pretty well-organized and all the characters have distinct enough voices (TS2GBA DO NOT INTERACT) that it's incredibly easy to figure out who said what. There's also a lot more unused strings, but I'm just focusing on the dialogue right now

First of all, all characters, not just those you can have as a roommate, have roommate acceptance dialogues. So, here are all the unused ones.

BAYOU BOO: Gosh, that's fine idea. Don't mind if I do. BERKELEY CLODD: Sure I'll move in with you. What a splendid way to meet a whole new set of clients. LINCOLN BROADSHEET: Sure, I'll live with you, buddy. But be warned: I stay up late. CRAWDAD CLEM: You know, It'd be real fun to share accommodations with you for a bit. Sure. EPHRAM EARL: To haunt your house with your permission, this I will do. PRITCHARD LOCKSLEY: Sure, so long as you help me memorize my lines. HARLAN KING: Of course I will. How wonderful! LOTTIE CASH: Okay! That'd be killer! We're going to have such an awesome time. LUTHOR L. BIGBUCKS: Sure, why not. It'll be just like college all over again. MAMBO LOA: I would gladly share accommodations with you. When do I move in? Now? MAXIMILLIAN MOORE: Sure, why not? So long as you don't mind the smell of bleach. OLDE SALTY: You're darn tooting! I'd be your roommate any day. CRYSTAL: Okay! I can't wait to redecorate your dumpy pad. POLLY NOMIAL: Yes. To maintain a domicile with you would be most enlightening. GIUSEPPI MEZZOALTO: Why not, right? It'll be loads of fun. I'm moving in today! ROXANNA MOXIE: Sure, why not? It'll be fun, you know? A real laugh. THERESA BULLHORN: Yes! I would love to share your life of glamour and fame. DARIUS: Heck yeah, dawg. We can kick it together. DADDY BIGBUCKS: You betcha! DET. DAN D. MANN: It's an interesting proposition. Hm… Consider it done! LILY GATES: An excellent plan! Your place is much closer to where I work! KRIS THISTLE: You want me to move in with you? After all I've done? Wow. You're great. GRAMMA HATTIE: What a grand idea. Your house will be a great place to hold meetings.

There is also an unused set of rep group-related dialogues. These ones most likely being used if you managed to get an exceedingly poor rep with your rep group.

DARIUS: Hey, @1. Check yourself before you wreck your Rep. The Streeties are getting sick of you hanging around. LUTHOR L. BIGBUCKS: Sorry to be the one to break this to you, @1, but the rest of the Richies think you're getting a tad uppity. Clean up your act or we'll boot you. POLLY NOMIAL: Our patience with your gradual assimilation into our social sphere is waning. Progress or be excommunicated from the Nerdies. ROXANNA MOXIE: A few words of advice @1. Shape up or ship out of our group. End of story.

These MAY not be unused, but I've never heard of anyone getting any of these messages, and, for the life of me, I could not get them to activate through my own twiddling. There exists no dialogue for actually kicking you out of the rep group. So even if this WAS used, it would just be an empty threat. (I mean… it's implied that it was your rep group that picked you up after you crash landed in Miniopolis, which is why you're apart of it despite not really knowing anyone.)

As a side note, when I was going through getting to -10 rep points with the Richies, after about -6, every time I lost a rep group point, Roxanna Moxie kept on giving my silver plaques. RICHIE silver plaques. Using the Artsie silver plaque dialogue. By the time I was done testing things out, I had five of them. Strange glitch?

So, the Urbz GBA, for whatever reason, doesn’t let us romance the elderly. That doesn't mean that there isn't flirting and kissing dialogue for the unromancable characters! The first dialogue is flirting, and the second one is refusing to accept a kiss.

EPHRAM EARL: A piece of human interest seems to be the loving way. EPHRAM EARL: I cannot kiss that which I cannot touch. HARLAN KING: Eh? Does that have a saucy secondary meaning I am not aware of? HARLAN KING: Ugh! No! Your breath smells like everything but fresh! OLDE SALTY: Arrr, you've cracked my barnacle encrusted heart! OLDE SALTY: I'll kiss no one! Not until you proves your devotion! DADDY BIGBUCKS: Hello there… do you mind if I buy you a small island? DADDY BIGBUCKS: Get away from me, you pest! I'd sooner kiss a sneezing dog. GRAMMA HATTIE: Stop it this instant. I know you're just trying to fool with an old woman's mind. GRAMMA HATTIE: Ack! Help! Help! Police! This boy is trying to inhale me!

Related, when a character accepts a hug or a kiss in-game, they don't say anything. However, there is actually unused dialogue for this event. Almost all of it is just "Aw!". However, there's a few exceptions.

BAYOU BOO: Aw! BAYOU BOO: Plant one right here, girl! BERKELEY CLODD: Come hither and embrace me, @1! BERKELEY CLODD: Ah! LINCOLN BROADSHEET: Come here, you! LINCOLN BROADSHEET: Oh! EPHRAM EARL: If arms were ribbons consider this my bow. EPHRAM EARL: Ah! EWAN WATAHMEE: Hugs are free, yes. But they are also round. EWAN WATAHMEE: Ah! PRITCHARD LOCKSLEY: It's so good to see you too! Let's do lunch. PRITCHARD LOCKSLEY: Ah! LOTTIE CASH: It's fun to be this close to me, huh? LOTTIE CASH: Oh! LUTHOR L. BIGBUCKS: Wrap your arms around me, baby. LUTHOR L. BIGBUCKS: Yeah! MAXIMILLIAN MOORE: You washed your hands before you hugged me, right? MAXIMILLIAN MOORE: Eek! CRYSTAL: Gee, thanks. You're sweet. CRYSTAL: Oh! OLDE SALTY: That's right, give poor Olde Salty a nice hug. OLDE SALTY: Yay! DADDY BIGBUCKS: Normally I don't let people touch me if they're not wearing an expensive coat. But for you'll I'll make an exception. DADDY BIGBUCKS: Normally I don't let people kiss me if they're not wearing fruity lip gloss. But for you'll I'll make an exception.

The first dialogue here is accepting a hug; the second is accepting a kiss. All characters not listed here just has "Aw!" as a response to both being kissed and hugged.

There seems to be a scrapped interaction, most likely called 'Talk about Pets.' from the subject of the replies and the fact that it was tucked between 'Talk about Ninjas' and 'Talk about Politics,' which would make the placement alphabetical. I wonder why it went unused!

Not every single character had a line for this. The following characters do not: Bayou Boo, Crawdad Clem, Ephram Earl, Ewan Watahmee Harlan King, Luthor L. Bigbucks, Mambo Loa, Misty Waters, Olde Salty, and Theresa Bullhorn. Some of these characters do have other lines that refer to owning a pet; they just don't have a dialogue here.

BERKELEY CLODD: I looked into buying a talented chimpanzee, but very few know how to pick pock- er, pick their nose. LINCOLN BROADSHEET: I have my pet rabbit to thank for my interest in journalism. Why? Well… isn't it obvious? PRITCHARD LOCKSLEY: I was so proud my pet lizard Harvey was cast as the lead in a new gladiator film. Sure he beat me for the role… but he was wonderful! LOTTIE CASH: I have a cute little pug named Paris. You don't think I'll get sued for that, do you? I hope not. MAXIMILLIAN MOORE: Sooner or later, every disease that pets get will jump to humans! The end is near! CRYSTAL: I totally want a pet dolphin so it can protect me from sharks. PHOEBE TWIDDLE: My mom was a cat lady and my dad was a dog guy, so I learned to love pets very early on. But I'll never forget the smell. POLLY NOMIAL: Your colorful colloquy is highly amusing. GIUSEPPI MEZZOALTO: If I tell you I like snakes, you'd better not make any jokes. Got it? ROXANNA MOXIE: Come by the carnival sometime! There are lots of needy animals there. SUE PIRNOVA: I'm not organized enough to take care of another creature. The best I can manage is feeding ants. DARIUS: I like goldfish. What? DADDY BIGBUCKS: Yuck! There is nothing worse that a sniveling, drooling, hairy servant who cannot follow orders. DET. DAN D. MANN: When people don't clean up after their pets, who do you think has to do it for them? Huh? I'm asking you because I don't know the answer. LILY GATES: Every time I buy a pet, I get so busy I forget to feed it. And then… well… I shouldn't own any pets. KRIS THISTLE: Don't remind me! My landlord doesn't allow pets, so when I moved here I was forced to sell my ferret. CANNONBALL COLEMAN: I owned a crow a few years ago. He made enough noise to scare ghosts away. I miss that old bird. GRAMMA HATTIE: I'm definitely a cat person. And a dog person. And a chicken person too. I'm really a pet person. DUSTY HOGG: I used to own a small python and a small dog. Now I just own a bigger python.

'Talk about Pets' does not show up in the list of interactions earlier in the string set.

Lincoln Broadsheet has some mission dialogue that, again, may not be unused, but I have never seen, and I have never seen anyone else talk about it.

YOU: Mister Broadsheet, would you help me write a thesis? LINCOLN BROADSHEET: Gosh, I would if I wasn't so busy. Tell you what I can do though: I'll let you use my computer to log in to my research database. That should give you some good ideas. LINCOLN BROADSHEET: Hey, have you heard the recent news? A local TV station is filming a new Reality Television Show. YOU: Interesting, but I don't watch much TV. LINCOLN BROADSHEET: Me neither, but don't let that stop you from going up to Paradise Island and signing up. If you do well I could write a big article about you. YOU: Are they still letting people sign up? LINCOLN BROADSHEET: I think so. Head up to Paradise Island and see for yourself. And if you do well Id love to write an article on you.

Note: I have been informed that the first two lines in this section actually can happen in-game!

It is also appears he would have given the player the Reality TV Show plotline.

And finally, ‘The Bad Ending.’

DADDY BIGBUCKS: People around here call me Daddy Bigbucks. If you like what you see in Miniopolis, it's a good bet I own it.

This is actually listed next to all the character introductions, so this would have been how Daddy Bigbucks introduced himself, if he were to actually introduce himself. There are placeholders for the other characters who don’t get to say a proper introduction as well (Kris Thistle, Det. Dan D. Mann, Crawdad Clem, Harlan King), but they’re just placeholders. No text of relevance.

[dispatchpodcast]

The twelfth episode is here!

In this episode, meet @tripleaxeldiaz (aka spinningincircles aka Lauren), hear all about her fic, and listen to Rachel almost forget to ask about Lauren's podcast!

Listen to a preview above, stream the full episode on Anchor.fm, or find it on platforms including Spotify, Apple Podcasts, Google Podcasts, and more.

See the show notes below for timestamps of when specific discussion takes place, and for links to Lauren, her works, and her recommendations for works by creators @elisela @extasiswings @letmetellyouaboutmyfeels @woodchoc-magnum @cinematicnomad @catdadeddie @buttercupbuck @nymika-arts and @tawaifeddiediaz

Show Notes:

Topics:

Welcome and guest intro (03:13)

How Lauren got into 9-1-1 (feat. starting with Lone Star) (05:38)

Favourite things about 9-1-1 (feat. the beauty of getting the Begins episodes) (19:58)

Favourite character (once again, bet you can't guess…) (26:22)

Favourite episode and scene (feat. being haunted by the shooting) (37:24)

Discussion of Lauren's writing and fic (44:15), focused on: maybe one day i’ll fly next to you (feat. can you believe Lauren has never ice skated?! & having a fic made into a fanfic book) (44:28); always golden in the sky series (feat. the productive procrastination of research) (1:40:51); when the dance is through, it’s me and you (feat. Rachel prematurely starting 6B spec chat) (2:17:48); and maybe then, I’ll fade away (and not have to face the facts) (feat. thank god for people on Tumblr who will help you find fic) (2:46:54)

What Lauren is working on (3:01:17)

Lauren's fandom history (feat. old fanfiction.net accounts you would rather forget…) (3:03:36)

Thoughts on Season 6 so far and predictions (3:15:17) (feat. Lauren is much older and wiser (despite being younger!) than Rachel)

Recommendations for creators and fanworks (3:29:17)

Lauren’s podcast (The Leading Lady Club) (3:32:20)

Goodbye and outro (3:33:54)

Referred to in episode:

Lauren's Tumblr and AO3

Fics discussed: maybe one day i’ll fly next to you; always golden in the sky series (all was golden when the day met the night and darling let me trace the lines); when the dance is through, it’s me and you; and maybe then, I’ll fade away (and not have to face the facts)

Other fics of Lauren's mentioned: his name on your heart; fool for you from the bottom of my soul; and subtle as a brick in the small of my back

incorrect buddie quote post that inspired Lauren's first buddie fic

Eli (elisela)

Oli (tsoanatural) and an example of the fic books

Meg (nymika-arts)

picture of all the 911 fic books that Rachel has together

Kris (hattalove), Kris' podcast ep, and Kris' fic book

Mads (letmetellyouaboutmyfeels)

Those Two Firefighters fic

my post asking seeking maybe then, I’ll fade away (and not have to face the facts)

Morgan (rewritetheending)

Nova (catdadeddie) and 911bts

The Leading Lady Club Podcast

Lauren's recommendations:

Eli (elisela)'s fic

Chapel (extasiswings)'s fic

Mads (letmetellyouaboutmyfeels)'s fic

Felicity (woodchoc-magnum)'s fic, including the you can tell everybody this is your song series

Kat (cinematicnomand)'s fic and edits and gifs, including the happy eddie diaz series

Nova (catdadeddie)'s edits and gifs and 911bts

Alicia (buttercupbuck)'s edits and gifs and fic, including in a week

Meg (nymika-arts)'s art, edits and gifs, and fic

Zee (tiawifeeddiediaz)'s fic and edits and gifs

Contact details:

Dispatch Tumblr: dispatchpodcast.tumblr.com Dispatch email: dispatcha911podcast@gmail.com Rachel's Tumblr: burnthatbridge.tumblr.com

Credit:

Intro and outro music by BrightestAvenue from Pixabay

[prodigaldaughteralice]

My raeda playlist is finally all put together! And because I'm a nutcase, I did an illustration for each track. For the rymin playlist, I tried to make them all go together smoothly, but for this one I decided to challenge myself to do each one in a different style! Here's some thumbnails:

Annotations and full illustrations under the jump :)

Luna-- Hayley Kiyoko; young Raine infatuated with Eda.

Luna, tell me, do you want me here right under you? Trying to follow every move Will you ever come down?

My Best Friend's Hot-- The Dollyrots; young Eda infatuated with Raine.

I'm gonna tell you that you're mean, 'cos you don't know You interrupt another dream, so out you go!

Clean-- Pale Waves; the young lovers.

You're the one girl that I just can't get enough of Maybe it's love, maybe it's a moment. You're the one drug that I don't want to get clean from, Is it too soon to say that I'm falling?

ICIMY-- Phoebe Ryan; Eda post-breakup. (Side note, I had never seen the official music video for this song before I put the playlist together for youtube so I only just found out the love interest in it is also a hot enby. Fate!)

Who do I call when I fall into something I can't escape? What am I supposed to do, what am I supposed to do In case I miss you?

Favourite Record-- Fall Out Boy; Raine post-breakup.

You were the song stuck in my head, every song that I'll ever love. Play it again, and again, and again, And you can get what you want, but it's never enough.

Favourite Year-- The Chicks; looking back on it with a little more distance and fondness.

You looked at me like no one else, But sometimes love just doesn't seem to conquer all.

To Noise Making (Sing!)-- Hozier; Eda hears Raine is teaching for the Bard Coven and misses when their music was free.

I couldn't name the feeling carried in that voice; Was it that, or just the act of making noise that brought you joy?

Best of All Possible Worlds-- Kris Kristofferson; Eda's life on her own (clashing with cops, making trouble)

That policeman said "Mister Cool, if you're not drunk then you're a fool." I said "if that's against the law, tell me why I never saw Nobody in that jail of yours who wasn't just as low-down poor as me?" ...well, that was when someone turned out the lights And I wound up in jail to spend the night...

Music Jail pt. 1-- They Might be Giants; Raine's life on their own (subtler forms of resistance.) Also note that Music Jail pts 1 and 2 are the same track but 2 doesn't suit Raine as well; just bear with me lol

Where you goin', buddy? Where you goin', buddy? Won't you come with me to music jail?

This Love-- Taylor Swift; reunion.

These hands had to let it go free, and This love came back to me.

I Wish I Was the Moon-- Neko Case; isolated from each other, both trying to make the world better.

Paralyzed and collared tight, No pills for what I fear. This is crazy, I wish I was the moon tonight.

The Long and Winding Road-- The Beatles; Raine realizes they can't keep her out of the loop anymore.

Anyway, you'll never know The many ways I've tried. But still, they lead me back...

Now You Know-- Anaïs Mitchell; together again, Eda thinks about her future, her kids, death, and Raine.

When I think about dying, I think about children, And when I think about children, I think about you.

Lowlife-- That Poppy; delighted to be together after it all.

And I get so lonely, I can't make it on my own, And I need to see you-- can you come to my chateau?

Always-- The Veronicas; they've been through a lot and there will always be difficulties, but it's okay.

My house, my house is yours, so you can take your coat off, And you can close the door, my love's not gonna run out.

Because the Night-- Patti Smith; lovers.

Love is an angel disguised as lust, Here in our bed until the morning comes.

Nothing Matters When We're Dancing-- The Magnetic Fields; Comfortable together.

Dance with me, my old friend, once before we go. Let's pretend this song won't end, and we never have to go home.

Our House-- Crosby, Stills, Nash, and Young; the whole rest of their lives gets to be together.

Staring at the fire for hours and hours While I listen to you play your love songs all night long for me Only for me...

[aeempress]

Apritello Express Evidences: Movie

First of all, I would like to note that the turtle movie is NOT a romantic movie. This film focuses on the family, on the development of the characters of Raph and Leo in the first place, hences all the attention to them. Most of the timing, scenario tricks are designed to HIGHLIGHT, to show it.

I would also like to emphasize that this is MY opinion, you can either agree or disagree with it. I will be glad to see your own in the comments below. And also - my deepest gratitude to @jazzymarie1006 for your support and messages. And Kris, of course (I love ya buddy) And now - after this preamble, I'd like start.

As it was revealed earlier, Apritello is not just a peering in the forehead, this pairing is not about imposing or shoved our dear buns into your face from the screen, as it was in the TMNT-12. I sincerely believe that there is a connection between A&D, and not a connection at the level of a brother and sister, but deeper and more tremulous, more tender and gentle than friendly or even best- friendly. Again - Apritello is served contextually, natively, through certain gestures and small phrases.

I adore this scene with all my heart, moreover, this scene repeats and IS evolving , changing in the course of the film.

Firstly: the composition of the scene itself is built so that the viewer sees the interaction of Donny and April, and not Donny and the family WITH April.

Donnie explains for his ways of dealing with anxiety, and their interaction here is pure gold. It's just cute, in addition, it feels like Donnie is explaining his reason to April. His gaze, his posture - everything here is so telling that I don't even need to add anything.

And if you doubt that Donnie's attention is really focused on April, look for yourself: the truth is born in comparison.

Donnie explains for his ways of dealing with anxiety, and their interaction here is pure gold. It's just cute, in addition, it feels like Donnie is explaining his reason to April. His gaze, his posture - everything here is so eager to speak that I don't even need to add anything.

And if you doubt that Donnie's attention is really focused on April, look for yourself: the truth is born in comparison.

But I WILL say: they are cute. Just cute. And moreover, as I said, these pokemons are also evolving.

(those faces tho)

(same vibe, same energy)

The connection between April and Donnie is felt much deeper than it was shown in the series:

 Such a great picture full of details. A bunch of references, hello there: a microwave oven (episode war and pizza, with a flying microwave oven, as well as a Splinter microwave - Donatello's creations; huge hammers - very often Don uses huge sledgehammers in battle, cute reference. Donnie's stomach, I believe, is a reference to the episode "Pizza puffs", on Tummytello himself.

But this whole list is important not only by nods in the direction of certain series. This whole brainstorm diagram is confirmation that April O'Neill has an incredible level of power in this family. I dare say that April is the only one in the family who has full access to Donatello's laboratory, to his developments and inventions. And this access was granted to her by Donnie himself for sure.

Let me clarify: Don is very scrupulous when it comes to his territory. Don's lab is his and only his space, so it was shown in the show. The brothers did not have access there, the laboratory itself is locked as a rule and has many degrees of protection. Given that April was aware of Donnie's nickname long before the brothers, it would not be at all surprising that April is aware of how to get into his lab.

Microwave, laser, black hole, acids, jackhammer… it's all 100% owned by the greatest turtle genius™.

Funny easter egg: Zettaflare is a powerful magic spell used by Donald Duck at a pivotal point in Kingdom Hearts III.  Donald is also the used form of the name Donatello in the family (from Leo and Mikey mostly).

An equally delicious scene: Splinter and April escape from the lair, and again - details.

(full access to all Donnie's stuff it is)

April does not contact Leonardo directly, who is in charge of the mission. We just don't get to see the moment that April can't get through to him, as it was with Leo:

Leo: Donnie, Mikey, anybody?

While Leo contacts to every turtle he could, April April contacts Don directly right away. Directly.

This is indicative on the one hand, and logical on the other. In a moment of panic, April calls Don directly, who will be able to come up with a way out that will be able to coordinate her, because he is usually aware of everything that is happening. Let's also add that April DOESN'T know what condition the guys and the operation are in. She DOESN'T know how they are divided, or if they are alive at all.

April: Donnie! Come in! They found us. Where should we go? Donnie?!

And - her face. Her face changes as soon as she cried his name, because Donnie was still able to get in touch. April is genuinely worried, and her experience becomes even deeper when Don describes the situation. She rushes there at the first call.

And can we talk about this whole situation?

Donnie keeps April's bat. It's not only nod to the show itself:

but also made me think about Commander O'Neil design.

Some points here: 

- April’s weapon is not a bat or gun. It’s bo-stuff. Pretty close to one before Hamato Nimpo's one and this one.

- April’s torso armour is built alike Donnie’s plastron. Unlike his brother’s, Don has smooth plastron without a “bump”. It makes sense: among the brothers Dee has the most  similar to human’s body. It will be perfect fit at April’s anatomy and protect her inners. 

- goggles. April wears a cat-like red glasses in present but in future her goggles are quite similar to Donnie’s one. It’s sad we didn’t gain Future Donatello’s design but i do believe he worn something like that. You see, his trade mark hasn’t change with years, I have strong doubts about Donnie changed hard in future. His gear hadn’t change since he was 12. It’s a statement. 

- her knee-pads is designed like Don’s.

From those details only it’s easy to say how strong their boundary was. April WANTS to remember Donnie, her gear is his legacy. 

Don, in turn, always keeps April's weapon with him, which is somewhat sentimental. In this way, I suppose, in his strange way, he protects her. Thus, the Apritello team has unlocked a new achievement: Partners in crimes Arms.

And well, they really are, because they even fight side by side:

The bat! Which magically appeared thanks to Don, because April threw the contents of her bag when she tried to fight off the Krang sister and she ain't have any from the beginning unless breaking out from the lair.

Both them fighting WITH each other and FOR each other is important. Usually April is more openly to her saving activities with Donnie while he seems to be total stranger to it.

I may assure you: it's nothing like that. April's coming to the rescue of booty one certain turtle, moreover April is quite... showing off. Like a knight in a shiny armour.

And Donnie feels secure about it. They both is a great team. April has an inconceivable energy plus rad, even mad and sick skills, Donnie works great with it.

Donnie: Is it late to join April?..

(Jeeez. Those vibes. I'm dead every time)

And thing I like the most - Donnie protects April, too. In his own specific way.

(April's pod was released first )

Yeah, he was checking on her. He did it immediately. Just sayin'. nothing to see here, right? (Said aeempress with not even a slightest hint on sarcasm).

Full circle, guys! FULL-GODDAMN-CIRCLE!

Oh. And this. My precious treasure. My guilty pleasure of sore eyes of mine.

I'm sorry, but Donnie, who is experiencing the tactile contact with someone for quite a long scene (7 seconds), and feels absolutely comfortable about it. And it's NOT MIKEY. This pose of April is a bit possessive, showing April's sympathy for Donnie. I'm clinging to this scene because it's a hug option for Apritello.

During the whole show, we saw their hugs only once, and then - in a rush of shared and very strong emotional stressful occasion. We didn't get them for the whole movie either, and here it's about Donatello's character. As it seems, Donnie has autistic features such as: flat voice, hyper-fixating at some of his areas such as math, engineering, tends to classify everything about himself and pushing others to get along with that (which fails). He's self-invested and more importantly - he has low empathy (emotional issues) and tactility issues.

He doesn't really like tactility (with the exception of Mikey and group interactions, most of that was initiated by him). Donnie is just not the type of turtle that handles it easily. The fact that he lets April rest her elbow and lean on is an indicator. The silently yelling one. On the other hand, just think: this is the most inconvenient for April. The softshell is much taller, besides, there is a battleshell on his shoulders, which also does not contribute to the comfort. However, April doesn't take her arm away even when Don gestures (it's even harder to hold her shoulder and elbow like that when someone moves).

Don is in a battleshell and will not take it off, because of vulnerability - he has suffered enough without a battleshell in the film. The second reason is his extremely high sensitivity to touch, which was as shown through out the film:

Donnie: uncomfortable... with - emotions -

The fact that Don is uncomfortable when someone hugs him spontaneously is also evidenced by Raph:

Raph: Don't worry, Donnie! It's NOT a HUG, IT'S RESCUE!

And Still we DO have indirect huggings:

(He hugs April twice without getting caught)

So - yeah. It's not many, but still - we've got something. Something - more than nothing, we should cherish that. Do hope to see their further developing and jou these two will bring in.

And some moments were not included into analysis but I adore 'em with all my heart

[eliaskahtri]

Hand Warmers || Elias & Marcus

TIMING: Current LOCATION: The Commons PARTIES: Elias (@eliaskahtri) & Marcus (@thenavysealkie) SUMMARY: Marcus runs into Elias during the frostbite festival and decides to confront him. They get deep. CONTENT WARNINGS: None

Today was one of the more exciting days that Marcus had experienced in a while, and this time it was a good kind of excitement. The town had set up their own little version of a Kris Kringle market and he was excited to check out all of the little stands that were set up. He had one of these that would come to town every year where he grew up and he was interested to see how different towns ran theirs. 

As he approached the market area, he could see plenty of people gathered around, all bundled up in their winter gear. Marcus had dressed warm as well, but he was already starting to feel the sting of the cold wind hitting his face. He decided to hit up a hot chocolate stand so he could warm up a bit. 

While scanning the different stands trying to find what he was looking for, a familiar face appeared in the crowd. One that had been ghosting him for the past two weeks. 

“Elias?” he said questioningly, trying not to break his line of sight on the man. He knew everyone had their reasons for ghosting others, but Marcus felt he had the right to know what Elias’s reason was. After all, they had become a bit closer than just running buddies at that point. 

“Elias!” he repeated again, not sure if the other man hadn’t heard him or if he was ignoring him on purpose. 

It had been his assistant’s idea to go out to the market. She needed to find Christmas gifts for her family, and decided that Elias needed to do something that wasn’t working for once in his life. Which… fair enough. He was standing in front of a puzzle stall. They made little intricate pieces that slotted together like cogs and gears. Of course, he had to have it. 

That’s when Elias heard a familiar voice. A voice he was rather keen on avoiding. Thanks very much. He pretended he didn’t hear Marcus, continuing with his transaction with the vendor. Then his name echoed out again. Shit, there was no getting out of this, was there? After taking the bag from the vendor, Elias finally turned around to face Marcus with an awkward smile. 

“Oh, hey!” He called out, making his way over to Marcus. “Sorry I didn’t get in contact. Life got…” he trailed off. How did he explain that his life had turned upside down? That his closest friend was leaving? That fae and werewolves and god knew what else was real? He had more than one late-night freak-out over it. “...weird.” He finally concluded. There was no other word to describe it other than weird. 

“Come to check out the festival?” He asked, not wanting to dwell on his hang-ups too much. “Naya, my assistant, dragged me out of the apartment.” He admitted. He wouldn’t have come here if it weren’t for her insistence. “Between person shit and work, I haven’t really had any time to breathe.” It was the truth, Elias realized. He worked himself too hard in all aspects of his life, and that’s how he kept ending up in these situations of severe burnout. 

While Marcus wasn’t sure if he really believed what Elias had to say, he decided the excuse was good enough for now. 

“I get it. Life has a habit of getting really weird really quick. Feels like it’s been doing that a lot lately, come to think of it.” 

He didn’t really feel like giving him the third degree. Just wanted to subtly let him know that that ghosting was very much not cool and then let him enjoy the rest of the festival. But now that he was here, actually speaking to him again, he found he didn’t want to end the conversation just yet.

“If it ever gets to be too much, you can talk to me. You know? Even if I have nothing else to offer in terms of help, I’ll always at least be a listening ear. And a voice of reason, if needed of course.” 

He listened to Elias recount how busy he’s been and could relate. It definitely wasn’t like he wasn’t going through his own shit. 

“It’s the holidays, busy time for everyone. I get how some things can slip through the cracks.” He had never been clingy. In fact, he often criticized previous lovers on their tendency to get way too close to him. Yet here was, almost wanting to demand Elias at least send him a “hey, can’t talk right now. Work shit” text. But he had never been like that and didn’t want to be. So instead he simply nodded his head after an awkward pause and said “Well…I should probably let you enjoy the rest of the festival, huh? Unless you wanted some company”. 

Everything in Elias screamed to let Marcus walk away. This was how he got into trouble, letting people get too close. But He’d let Regan in, which hadn’t gone too terribly. Weird, but not terrible. So, after a beat of silence, Elias deflated. Telling Marcus the entire truth would be too much. “I was a dick for not saying anything. I just freaked out.” He finally admitted as he stepped away from the booth, looking at Marcus. “I’m sorry, it was shitty of me.” His gaze held sincerity, but it was also nervous. As if being this honest with a person was a step too far for him. He was getting too close, and it scared him. That had gone wrong for him in the past.

Elias nodded his head for Marcus to follow him. “Honestly, I’ve been… learning a lot about people I wasn’t supposed ever to know. And it freaked me out. And I shut down for a while. I was going through the motions instead of actually interacting with the world.” Elias kept his head down, only looking at Marcus out of the corner of his eye. Was he sharing too much? Did Marcus regret ever talking to Elias in the first place? “Still, I should have said something. Again, it was shitty of me.” he reiterated as he played with the handles of the bag in his hand.

“If you wanted to, I don’t think I’d mind a little company.” He relented, a shy smile peaking onto Elias’s face. “I’ve never lived in a town with this much activity going on.” He admitted, standing up a bit straighter as if he’d lifted a load off his shoulders. With every step, he became more and more like his normal, chipper self. “Well, I guess I’ve never lived in a small town with this much going on. San Diego had plenty.”

Marcus was relieved to hear the honesty from Elias. He could relate about discovering things about people. He could also sympathize that his entire worldview was still recently turned completely on its head, so he may not be in the best headspace right now. 

“You’re good, man. I was just worried about you, that’s all. You’ve seemed more bothered recently, at least judging from what little I’ve seen of you. You know I’m still here if you need to talk, right? I mean I’ve gone through some shit of my own recently so I completely understand not being in a great headspace.” 

“San Diego is much warmer, and the town doesn’t actively try to kill you. But this town has its own charm you really can’t get anywhere else. Plenty going on, for sure, but at least you have time to meet people and make every event feel like a community driven thing.” He offered a warm smile. 

“Hey, I was just about to grab some hot chocolate, did you want some?”

Elias wanted to shrug it off, but something kept eating at him. Why wouldn’t Marcus tell him the truth of what he was? It was written all over his face, the storm clouds hidden behind his eyes. He clenched his jaw, then relaxed it. “I can handle the truth, you know.” He finally said. “I’ve found out quite a lot, and I’m still standing.” He really had to work on controlling what he said and when he said it. He had just blurted it out. “I mean, you said that you’re something else, but you didn’t want to overwhelm me.” Elias fiddled with the handle of the bag, staring down at it before deciding to be brave for once in his life and meet Marcus in the eyes. “And you can talk about what you’ve been through to me. Maybe we should… both stop hiding.” 

“Eh,” Elias responded. “I mean, San Diego is nice, don’t get me wrong.” He rubbed at the back of his neck. “I mean, it’s home. But it’s not… not home anymore, you know? I outgrew it.” In a moment of panic, Elias had moved away from California and changed his setting completely. “I don’t know, maybe there were killer creatures all over the place, I was just too blind to see it.”

Elias thought for a moment, something about an unmanned hot chocolate station seemed like a recipe for disaster. “The one that no one is watching the drinks? Where anyone could tamper with them, that hot chocolate?” Elias’s brows knitted together, followed by a shake of his head. “Are you sure that’s a good idea?”

Hearing Elias’s request, Marcus let out a heavy sigh. “You really like stirring up a hornet’s nest, don’t you? I feel like every time some revelation about reality hits you, you very decidedly do NOT handle it. But if you must know…” he trailed off, getting himself ready to tell him. It wasn’t as if selkies had a bad reputation or anything. But once Elias knew, Marcus would only be seen as something else; worst case scenario he’d be seen as a monster. He felt he risked losing Elias and yet…he knew that he deserved nothing but the truth after an entire life of being deceived. 

“You remember that day on the beach? When we first met? Didn’t exactly get off on the right foot. But we got to talking about a very specific brand of cryptids. Seal people, selkies if you will.” He took a brief pause, waiting to see a hint of recognition so he wouldn’t have to give Elias a crash course reminder of what selkies were. “Well anyway, the reason I knew so much is because I, sort of… am one. A seal person.” 

He didn’t wait to gauge Elias��s reaction, he almost couldn’t bear to look at the aftermath of him revealing his true identity. He swiftly turned to look at the unmanned hot chocolate station. Quickly trying to change subject he muttered out “Oh would you look at that. No oversight or anything. You’re right, bad move getting the hot chocolate.” He said letting out a nervous laugh.

Elias grinned as Marcus sighed on him, knowing that he was most likely going to get his way. “I do like it, it’s my favorite activity!” Elias exclaimed as he clapped his hands together, walking in stride with Marcus. There was something about discovering that everyone in this town seemed to be anything but human. It was in part exciting, but also terrifying. Elias’s life was becoming more of him accepting that everyone was probably lying to him about something than telling him the truth.

As Marcus brought up their first meeting, Elias squinted. Selkies? Oh. Oh. Recognition washed over Elias’s features as he froze in place. Marcus? Over six-foot tall hulking muscle Marcus? Turned into a seal? Elias should be afraid. He should think about the ramifications of being involved with someone who could turn into something else. But a seal? That’s it? A smile broke out over Elias’s features, leaving him more excited than horrified. For once, he was giddy to learn something new about someone. “Wait, that’s… “he trailed off, not wanting to say what he was thinking. Would Marcus take offense? “That’s really cute.” He finally said, gaze shifting side to side as if he were being caught doing something he shouldn’t.

“What kind of seal?” He immediately asked, excitement shining in Elias’s eyes. For once, he could take this information in without freaking out. He was starting to get it. To accept things. This was good. Marcus was a selkie. A seal person. “I hope you turn into a gray seal, those guys are adorable.”

Marcus was relieved that Elias had responded well, and couldn’t help but feel flattered at being called cute. Still, there was a certain brand of toughness liked to maintain, and Elias was certainly putting a damper on it. 

“Northern elephant seal. They’re native to the Pacific Coast, and they’re big. Like, really big. With these loud and mighty roars. In packs, they’ve been known to attack sharks.” He said, hoping that would make seals sound cooler to Elias.

“I’m glad you’re at least responding to that well. I can show you when we’re somewhere with a lot less witnesses. I still like to keep a low profile about it, you know?But anyway, I’d love to answer whatever questions you have for me.”

Upon learning the type of seal that Marcus said he was, Elias pulled out his phone and typed it into google to get a better look at it. Oh, that was… one hell of a seal. Elias tucked his phone away, disguising his disappointment at Marcus not being something cuter. He was really hoping for a small, cute little seal. As Marcus tried to make himself sound cooler, Elias couldn’t help but let out a soft laugh, patting the other on the shoulder. “I’m sure you’re very tough. If I need someone to beat up a shark, I’ll call you first.” 

Elias took a glance around at everyone, glad they were relatively isolated as they walked together. “Yeah I mean… I don’t think people take kindly to learning that there are people out there that can just shapeshift.” Elias waved his hands in the air as he spoke. “I don’t know what to ask.” Elias then admitted, unsure where to start. “So you just turn into a seal? What else can selkies do?” He decided to ask, brows furrowing at the idea that all Marcus could do was be a seal. Sounded… almost lame. 

“Why don’t you like fae?” He then found himself asking, recalling Marcus’s immediate distaste when Elias had told him that he had discovered fae were real. “There some kind of beef there?” 

In response to Elias’s comment, Marcus could only shake his head. 

“Plenty worse things in the water to worry about than sharks. But don’t worry, I can keep you safe from those too. Well…most of them anyway. And if I ever end up having another giant snake problem, I’ll be sure to call you first.” Marcus said, trying not to add on a perverted snake joke to the end of his comment. 

“A lot of shapeshifters tend not to lead with ‘Hey there! I’m not human, please feel free to either kill me or run away now!’. We have to build a certain level of trust before we show that kind of thing, you know? I mean some hide it for more nefarious purposes, wolf in sheep’s clothing type deal. But I hope by now you trust that that isn’t the case for me.” 

Now that Marcus thought about it, his ability did seem a little lame. But, wasn’t that true for all shapeshifters? Some people turned into wolves, reptiles, or bird-humanoid things. The whole point of being a shapeshifter was you shifted your shape. And yet, compared to other thing Elias had seen, it must seem so mundane in comparison.

“Sorry to underwhelm you. If it helps sweeten the pot, I can also swim really good, even when I’m in my regular human shape.” 

He heard Elias’s question about fae, and why Marcus was so distrusting of them. He led Elias away to a more secluded spot, wanting to make sure nobody would overhear this next part. 

“I have another…talent, you could call it. I can steal magic from other creatures. I store it in a pelt that I keep on me at all times. Long story short, I keep it hidden away if I can because a lot of folks have various reasons to want to steal it from me. The fae, as a whole, fall into that group. They would always play tricks and steal from people when I was growing up, and almost tricked me right out of my pelt several times. I always had to be on the lookout for losing something so important to me. Mind you, not all fae are bad, of course. Many are goodhearted. But, I don’t know, I guess it’s a bit of a mental block I’ve never really gotten over. Not being able to let my guard down in fear I’ll lose something so important to me again.” 

“If it’s a small enough creature with not enough powers behind it, I can probably take a whack at it,” Elias replied with a crooked smile. “Otherwise, I’m shit out of luck and running away faster than you.” He amended with a shrug of his shoulder, a mischievous glint in his eyes as he cast a glance over to Marcus. “If I ever find myself willingly swimming in open ocean waters, I’ll make sure you’re there with me. But don’t think I’ll do that willingly without clinging to you for dear life. Oceans… they’re scary.” Elias felt a shiver run through his body.

“Well maybe they should!” Elias replied with wide eyes and raised brows. “Would make my life a hell of a lot easier. It’s bad enough when people are just people, but add another layer of potential supernatural chaos creature? It really makes things a hell of a lot harder to digest.” He blinked, realizing he didn’t panic at finding out what Marcus was. “But I didn’t freak out this time, so I’ve got that going for me.” He said with a grin. “One foot in front of the other, I’m getting better at this.” 

“You didn’t underwhelm me,” Elias shot back, nudging Marcus with a chuckle. “It’s nice to know that not everyone can herald the coming of death.” He shivered again, thinking to Regan. It was a lot when people had far more power than expected. Just a seal shapeshifter was a breath of fresh air. “At least you’re not a wereseal.” He added with a smirk. “Wonder what that would entail…” He trailed off, now lost in thought of the idea of the wereseal.

“I worked at the Mushroom Circle.” Elias began to say, biting at his lower lip as he thought about what to say next. “Turns out, I was a plaything that they used to entertain themselves. I was a laughing stock. A court jester, if you will.” He rolled his eyes. “I’m starting to realize, as much as I want to know more about them, I’m in danger around them. I almost got killed because I was close to them.” He sighed, slumping back into the seat a little. “Again,” Elias echoed with a quirked brow. “So you’ve lost it before? What happens if you don’t have it?” 

“Don’t worry”, Marcus replied, “I’ll make sure you stay real close to me whenever we go swimming. I wouldn’t worry all that much though. The really scary stuff is farther out from shore than any normal human could swim out to.”

“It isn’t that simple…hard to be a truly open book in this world.” He knew all too well how that usually ended for somebody like him. Rejection was one thing, having a sizable portion of people suddenly wanting you dead was something else entirely. “True, you didn’t freak out. I guess considering everything else you’ve been faced with a seal man isn’t too far fetched for you. I’m also really grateful for the whole ‘no were-seal’ thing. I like having control over when I turn.” 

Marcus had a spark of recognition as he mentioned a harbinger of death. “Death? You…know a banshee, I’m assuming? It makes a lot of sense why you were so freaked out then. They can be a little intense. Not exactly the whimsical trickster persona you typically associate with fae. Never had a problem with one personally, though.” 

Marcus nodded, not seeming very surprised at Elias’s treatment. “That sounds more typical. They love taking the piss out of humans. You might have said or done something to make them single you out that badly though.” Marcus’s face suddenly went stony when Elias called out his mention of “again”. “Yeah…happened not too long ago. Part of why I ended up in this town in the first place actually. It was stolen, but not by a fae. From somebody who was very close to me, actually.” He looked down without saying anything for a while. Here he was trusting again, but why? He was so certain he could trust William, and that clearly didn’t pan out. Why would he think this guy, who he knew for way less time, could be trusted with information so important? If he knew what was good for him, he figured, he’d shut his mouth and walk away while he still could. 

“I’m sorry, here I go talking your ear off again. I didn’t mean to interrupt you. By all means, carry on with whatever you were doing before I got here” Marcus said quickly, picking his head back up and turning to walk away from Elias, intent on not looking back.

Trying not to roll his eyes, Elias simply smirked in response to Marcus’s words. He was a flirt, and Elias still wasn’t sure what he wanted. Sure, Marcus was attractive and nice, but Elias wasn’t sure what he wanted out of anything at this point. Oh, get a best friend? She’s a banshee. Meet a nice guy? He turns into a seal for fun! None of this was making sense and it was overwhelming for him. 

“So no seal on the full moon, got it. Unless it’s for fun, of course.” Elias spoke with a slow nod. His face fell as Marcus seemed shocked by the idea of Elias knowing a banshee. “Yeah, she’s trying really hard to go back to being strict about her duty.” He paused, then kicked at the ground beneath his foot. “She’s leaving for Ireland, going back to where she belongs.” Elias rolled his eyes. “Or so she claims.” 

Elias listened intently as Marcus told him his story, and frowned as he suddenly clammed up and began to walk away. His brows furrowed as he shot a hand out to stop him, but Marcus was already a step out of reach from it. For a moment, Elias let him keep walking. Did he dare tread into uncharted waters? Did he let himself take that small jump? He took a deep breath, then marched after him. “Hey, I’m sorry I made you bring up something you didn’t want to.” Elias called after him, placing a hand on his shoulder. “But if you want to talk, I’m here.” He let his hand fall with a frown. “You don’t have to go at whatever you’re going through alone. God knows I’m tired of going through everything alone.” 

Elias wasn’t sure what he was asking for in that moment, but he suspected it stretched further than just what Marcus was going through. Maybe he wasn’t afraid of being with someone. But Marcus, well, he barely knew him. And he turned into a fucking seal, of all things. But he knew if he crossed his line, he couldn’t run away from it. Not again. “So let’s not be alone.” He then said, trying to hold Marcus’s gaze. 

At Elias’s insistence that he stay, Marcus wasn’t really sure how to respond. He, of course, wanted to stay. But it all seemed so…reckless? Then again, forming any kind of personal connection came with its own degree of risk. 

“No…I’m sorry. You couldn’t have known it was a sore subject.” Marcus said before letting out a long exhale. “Essentially, who I thought was a normal person was another selkie. One who lost his pelt. We tend to get all sorts of fucked up if we don’t have access to our pelts for too long. In fact, it can kill us. So in the process of him getting close to me, he learned all of my weaknesses and vulnerabilities so he could use them against me. Strike at the perfect moment and then make off like a thief in the night. Literally.” 

He didn’t like sharing what had happened. In fact, other than the siren he met the night William died, nobody knew that this had happened to him. He felt like an idiot for letting it happen, and felt it made him sound far weaker than he’d like to let on. 

“I don’t want to go through everything alone either. I don’t think anybody should have to.” He then grabbed hold of Elias’s hand and said “I won’t go anywhere if you don’t. So the world’s a fucked up place, doesn’t mean we have to suffer through it all in isolation, right?”

Suffering alone was something that Elias had become accustomed to. He’d never had someone who was willing to stand by him when things got tough. But then there was Marcus, holding his hands and throwing everything Elias knew to be true out the window. He took in a breath, then nodded his head in reply. Right. 

They were in this together now, the two of them had each other. Elias had someone. And that someone was Marcus. It was overwhelming, but for once, it was in a good way. He knew where he stood and didn’t feel a need to define what it was. “No, I’m not…” he paused, remembering what had happened last time. “I’m not going to run away. Not again.” Elias gave a smile, then nodded his head. He was sure, this time. “I’m done running.”

[ralseinumberonebiggestsupporter]

HI EVERYONE HERE'S THE LONG ASS POST EXPLAINING MY LIGHTNER RALSEI AU

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so basically in this au ralsei isn't the prince of the dark, he's just some kid (part boss monster part shadow monster). i already explained how he ended up in the adoption center here. that's basically the premise 0_0

susie and him are close buddies because they were in the same adoption center and susie became protective over him because the other kids made fun of him. over time they became like siblings so they never managed to get adopted because they didn't want to go if they couldn't go together, and since they were very different species there weren't any parents who were able to take care of both. so eventually they just ran away and are now living in hometown.

they've been in hometown for two years (currently they're both 16) so they aren't that new............ they're not really friends with anyone but That's Subject To Change.

(they live in one of the apartments in the complex, the landlord let them stay because people just Didn't move to hometown anymore. they just help them clean and go grocery shopping for them (i still have to decide who the landlord is lol) in exchange for the house. also as soon as they got old enough they started doing little jobs (susie helps at 'sans, ralsei helps at the flower king) so they're "basically fine" (no they're not))

^ outdated, they got surprise adopted by sans 😈😈

susie really disliked kris at first because they had a happy loving family, but then learned that there's more to them... they're also a huge dweeb

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since ralsei isn't in the dark world anymore there's someone else in castle town, his name is earlis and he's made out of a heart shaped locket that kris lost as a kid. he's rude to anyone who isn't part of the prophecy and is hopelessly in love with kris (despite only knowing them for two days...) which kris finds a bit weird but. they still want to be friends. earlis especially hates ralsei because he's not even part of the prophecy, and yet kris treats him with basic respect and even finds his dark world powers cool?!?!? FOR SHAME!!!! susie's part of the prophecy so he doesn't necessarily dislike her, he just hates the people she associates with....

his character arc over the chapters would involve him learning to be less judgemental and overcome his Darkner Struggles. also he will be friends with everyone and become less of an asshole

in chapter two he makes rooms for everyone except ralsei, for whom he places a dog bed inside susie's room. one day he will give him a normal bed

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ABOUT THE DARK WORLD!!!!!!

ralsei's still a wizard of sorts, but he's more of an evil shadow man you know. he uses shadow magic which is useful for putting enemies to sleep in one way or another (spooooookyyyyyyy).. kris thinks it's cool. susie also thinks it's cool. everyone thinks it's cool except earlis.

earlis's magic is basic bard abilities, he has a heart shaped string instrument which he can use to heal or hypnotize ET CETERA ET CETERA

susie and kris don't change much lol

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CHAPTER ONE!!!!!! DA BEGINNING

sooz and rals go with lancer while earlis goes around with kris, acting like a shoujo protagonist ("omg kris you're giving the ribbon to me????? do you think i would look cuter.." "your defense is shit") and he encourages pacifism (just to make r & s sound like Brutal Evil Killars) despite being the world's biggest violence fan. he is a bit of a hypocrite

everything goes about as well as you can imagine but at some point susie and ralsei have a conversation about the whole sooz being overprotective thing. ralsei says he's not five anymore and can defend himself pretty well and susie apologizes for her behavior 💔😢 they firends. sbiblings

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CHAPTER TWO!!!!! SUSIE DELTARUNE BECOMES GAY GAY HOMOSEXUAL GAY

it's!!! normal cyber world stuff!!! but with two goat boys!!!!!!!

ralsei's popup ads are "humans 4 monsters in ur area" and he starts crying about how he thought it was a friend making site, "dragon blazers rom hack working 20XX" and he installs a virus on the popup, and "shadow wizard money gang"

earlis's popup ads are "how to make them fall for you qwikihow", "cool blue knight dating sim" and "learn to curse someone in ten easy steps". self explanatory

in ralsei's room in queen's castle he has pixelated kittens from his search "kittycat pixel gif", "minecrap cat gif", "pixel gif cat" etc... a poster of a goth band from "disintegration album streaming free", and a list of names taped to the wall from "names that start with ral" (hes trying 2 find his parents...)

earlis doesn't have a room. he becomes a butler 👻

for the ferris wheel / acid tunnel they split up like this

susie goes on da ferris with noelle

ralsei goes on da boat with kris (didn't want to ruin the moment for susie)

earlis gets stuck on berdly duty

sus and elle talk about normal girl stuff. ralsei and kris talk about being orphans. earlis rants to berdly about how much he deserves to be kris's babygirl and berdly thinks he's hallucinating. very nice and cool

blah blah the roaring is coming waaaaahhh they go have a sleepover at kris's. new fountain who dis

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that's basically it gamers... LIKE AND SUB

[dollarbin]

Dollar Bin #27:

Willie Nelson Sings Kristofferson

When I was eight years old my parents took me to see my first naked lady. Let me tell you all about it.

I grew up in LA but had no real relationship to Hollywood; yes, we'd take periodic trips to Universal Studios to ride through the one foot high Red Sea, see the Psycho house and climb on props from The Incredible Shrinking Woman, but Ricky Schroder didn't live on my block and my dad was a house painter.

My only connection to Hollywood and fame was my mom's famous cousin Kris, who we'd see once every other year or so. Kristofferson has never known me from Adam but, like me, he loved my mother and deeply loved my grandmother. He was also incredibly handsome, kind, deeply masculine and, by that point, stone cold sober. So of course he was my idol.

And so when Songwriter, Kris's totally forgettable buddy flick with Willie Nelson, came out in 84, I begged my parents to take me to see it. The movie was about writing, I argued, and I was going to be a writer when I grew up. I was eight years old and I was already full of crap; the movie is almost as dumb as I was:

Bizarrely, my parents agreed to take me, and next thing you know my mother was literally covering my eyes with her hands as Cousin Kris cavorted with a naked lady who clearly wasn't his wife and who had the world's biggest knockers. Happily, my mother's fingers are skinny, so I got an eyeful. The movie taught me absolutely nothing about writing, but I did start to wonder about naked ladies. They seemed pretty cool.

Still, I wondered just how Kris's lovely wife felt about him making such a movie. Every time I was around them, she was literally covered in their babies - there were way too many of them for me to begin identifying individual ages or names, especially as they all looked the same. Did she know, I worried, about the lady with the giant boobies? Would there marriage survive?

Well, it's 40 years later and I'm proud to report that they are still very happily married. Maybe she never bothered to watch Songwriter...

Thankfully Nelson and Kristofferson's relationship was not born on the movie lot, and based on the image on the back of Willie's 79 album Willie Nelson Sings Kristofferson and their time together in the Highwaymen, I sense that the relationship is a special one for both men.

In preparation for my discussion of the record, here's a warm-up, one-question, multiple choice, pop quiz on Nelson:

Question: How many studio albums has Nelson put out in his 61 year career?

54

38

565

100

Before you google the answer, let me provide a little perspective. Nelson and Bob Dylan both made their album debuts in 62; 6 years later Neil Young put out his first solo record. To date, Neil has 45 studio albums, or so, to his name, depending on how you count. Dylan, 40.

(Stephen Stills, as we all know, Sucks: in a career that's as long as Young's he's produced somewhere under 30 records or so, and that total generously includes all the C, S & N albums.)

Choice #1 in the above quiz makes sense. It would make Nelson slightly more productive than Neil and far more productive than Bob, and I can get my mind around that: Bob's production has slowed down considerably in the last 30 years, and Young's alternated between rushing things out half-baked (for example, everything he ever made with members of Willie's family in the Promise of the Real) or refusing to issue finished and impossibly great records for decades for no discernible reason (Homegrown, Chrome Dreams - you know, two of the best records of all time).

Choice #2, wherein Nelson spent less time in the studio than either Bob or Neil, could work too: Nelson is 4 years older than Dylan (Willie's 90!) and he didn't put out any records until his late 20's; plus he's always high, right? So maybe he's less prolific?

Choice #3 is included to make sure you're not a bot. If you are, Greetings, Machine. I hope you are enjoying my blog! Thank you for being 53 of my 59 followers. When you are done reading this please go attack some Russian servers or something, okay?

Choice #4 is nearly as wacko, right? How could Willie possibly have produced 1.64 albums a year, smoked all that supposed pot, evaded all those supposed taxes and made a terrible movie with Cousin Kris along the way? Can't be done, right?

Wrong. The correct answer is #4. Nelson has made an even 100 studio albums in his career. In 1982 alone he put out 4 records, 3 of which were issued in consecutive months. Holy Smoke, Willie!

Now I want to come right on out and say that I own, and have only heard, a fraction of those albums. I count 9 on my shelf at the moment and I'm no real authority on Willie. What's more, I've never been to Farm Aid, nor have I ever seen an Angel Flying Too Close to the Ground. I've never even smoked any of Nelson's herb and I'd decline it if offered. So, if you want to put me in a full Nelson in the comments and critique all the follows, be my guest.

But in the meantime I'm gonna act like I know a lot about Wet Willie and his impossible album total and argue that the sheer enormity of his output explains a few things about him generally and Sings Kristofferson in particular.

The album in question is alternatively workman-like, tossed off, intricate and sublime. I'm guessing he recorded it in a weekend of single takes after spending ten years singing the songs for his own pleasure. Let's dive into this Dollar Bin must-have.

To begin with, the hits are all here. Make a list of Kristofferson songs you know and they are probably all on the record.

Bobby McGee is given a country blues work up with an extended jam at the back end. Nelson rides the riff in baritone. The truth is that I've never heard a single version of this wonderful song that I really love other than Kris's own take: only he really understands how damn sad the story is. Roger Miller sings it like he's the gringo at the fiesta; Gordon Lightfoot gets the job done then moves on to songs of his own that mean much more to him; Janis Joplin rewrites it almost entirely, and while the result is classic, I have to remind myself that hers is the same song.

Much the same can be said for the album's Sunday Morning Coming Down. Nelson is thoughtful, takes the song to church and then the dance hall, and fills both spaces with stately grace.

I like playing Nelson's version of the song while putting together a nice weekend brunch for my family. There's plenty fresh hot coffee on hand for my wife and the egg sandwiches have avocado, swiss and homemade hollandaise. I pick out nice plates.

But the song is about beer for breakfast. And only Kristofferson really conveys just how much misery it contains:

And so I think that the real magic of Nelson's record lies in the songs Kristofferson got wrong on his own. Take You Show Me Yours (And I'll Show You Mine). Kris was pretty lost on alcohol when he blasted through his own version: there's a 4,000 member choir on hand along with a trashcan percussion section and too slick of a pianoman. All poor Kris can do is warble along.

But Willie uses the song to show off his pipes. And, oh, aren't they glorious!

And the album closes with something pretty extraordinary I think. Please Don't Tell Me How the Story Ends is a song Kris passed on to others in the late 60's. He didn't attempt a version of his own until the 3rd album he made with Rita Coollidge and that record is straight up boring. Their marriage was already over; the story had already ended.

But Nelson's version is startlingly perfect. Just sit with me a moment. Enjoy it, till it's over. And lean in for the second line of the second verse. I find the note Willie hits for "softer" to be one of the most surprising and sublime moments in my entire Dollar Bin.

I kind of imagine Nelson will live to 100 and put out another 25 records. But Cousin Kris will surely pass away in the coming days, months or years. So too will Bob and Neil. I honestly hate to think about it. Just like me, they are all flawed men, yes, but I believe they are important artists and their contributions have been, and will continue to be, deeply positive.

When the day comes and I hear of Kris's passing, I'll surely put on this record and think with appreciation of the really nice moments I was lucky to spend in his company as a kid. I'll think of his wonderful songwriting, and I'll think of the loving pride with which he stood beside my grandmother. I'll probably remember too how he granted me my first look at boobies.

And when Willie Nelson begins to sing in Please Don't Tell Me How... and describes so perfectly a last night spent together, I'll sit still and close my eyes, saying a little prayer in my own way.

That's how I want the story to end.

[loathemetc]

DELTARUNE THEORY: The Old Chair

Well folks this one is a doozy and we have a wealth of new ARG(??? YEAH!) content from this SPAMTON SWEEPSTAKES LIVE EVENT [(LIVE!)] and obviously I should be talking about all the Noelle lore so let’s talk about this fucking chair instead:

Yes, a chair. There are many hidden links on the Deltarune website right now, and https://deltarune.com/chair/ sends you to well. A chair. A small, blue chair with a sheet draped over it. Clicking on it makes a sound play as it disappears, leaving garbled bits of color and nothing else behind. Also you can randomly get jumpscared by a familiar pair of yellow and pink eyes, so there’s that. 

Does that sound like a lot to unpack already? Well too bad buckaroo there’s more stuffed into this suitcase than you can shake a stick at! The name of the tab when you open this page is “But what if it could...”, click the chair and it changes to “... get darker than dark?”.

Sound familiar?

Besides the obvious reference to the classic line about being dark, darker, yet darker, to me it brings to mind Seam’s warning. Maybe it’s not such a good idea to be in the dark world at night... That’s at least two darknesses, which is more than one.

But wait, why a chair? Well, we know the third chapter’s dark world takes place in Kris’s house, obviously, which coincidentally just so happens to feature a named chair character! How convenient!

Thank goodness this mystery is solved except oh wait that doesn’t really make any sense, does it? This chair we’re talking about seems awful ominous, unlike beloved old Chairiel, adored by the family, front and center of the Dreemurr household. No, I think we’re looking for a different chair.

But that doesn’t mean we’re not looking for Chairiel.

Yes, something fans noted as soon as Deltarune chapter 1 released was that the Chairiel moniker seemed to have been transferred from one chair to another. While Chairiel in Deltarune is Toriel’s living room seat, Chairiel in Undertale was originally a small... Blue... Chair. Huh.

Could it be the the original Chairiel is in storage in the Dreemurr household somewhere still, in this new world? Abandoned and replaced? Well geez, all this ominous atmosphere, talk of being tossed aside, garbled messes and direct connection to those pink and yellow eyes sure is reminding me of our pals Jevil and Spamton huh?

So what the hell am I saying, that Chairiel, the ORIGINAL Chairiel from Undertale, is going to be Chapter 3′s hidden boss, feeling betrayed and broken after Toriel got a more comfortable chair to watch TV in!? Uh. I guess? I mean, I said I was spitballing here. 

But why those Pink and Yellow eyes... That’s Spamton’s bit, and only cause he was copying Swatch, right? Well, he was attempting to impersonate the head butler, but maybe there’s a reason he got the colors of Swatch’s orange and yellow glasses wrong. After all, we have another unexplained buddy with the very same colored eyes, don’t we?

Yeah, still no clue what that thing was about. But I’m getting the feeling we’re going to. Although, considering that pink and yellow jumpscare on the chair page redirects you back to the main sweepstakes page, it may just be Spamton trying to keep your nose out of business it doesn’t belong in. But that’s my final thought for now.

The site is still updating with new material, so if a wrench gets thrown in any of this, don’t blame me for jumping the gun. I’ll try to keep an open mind.

ADDENDUM 1 - It should be noted that the noise that plays when the chair is clicked on is called “water.mp3″ and sounds VERY similar to areas of Waterfall in Undertale such as the trash zone. How am I supposed to tie that to any of this?? Hahaha I have no idea.

ADDENDUM 2 - Could the sheet on the chair be the Shadow Mantle? Could the water noise have something to do with the Old Song from the Sea, mentioned by Riverperson in Undertale and Onion-San in Deltarune? So many questions...

[mrchaosman]

(You find yourself in a......)

????: STOP.

STOP, STOP, §TOP.

(Suddenly, a strange game console appeared).

????: WHAT DO YOU THINK YOURSELF.

THIS PLACE IS MINE.

THIS ETERNAL DARK IS MINE.

EVERYTHING HERE IS M>NE.

AND ONE MORE THING;

WHO THE ACTUAL HELL ARE YOU.

...

KRIS, HUH?.

WELL, KRIS, THE NAME'S GAMEBOLL.

THE FASTEST THING ALIVE.

OR.... I WAS.

WHAT ARE YOU IN F0R, HUH?.

...

FOR

FOR NOTHING.

WELL.

I SUPPOSE I HAVE TO TEACH YOU SOMETHING CALLED "PRIVACY" IDIOT.

YOU THINK YOU ARE VERY SLICK, THEN LET'S HOW YOU GONNA DODGE THIS.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH.

(Battle start).

(Check).

GAMEBOLL 55 ATK, 44 DEF.

An old crazy game guy that want to "play" with you

Susie: Well, I guess that's what we got for-.

(Suddenly...).

Susie: Ouch, HEY YOU JERK, LOOK WHERE YOU RUNNING!.

(Gameboll returns to the Fun gang).

Gameboll: OR WHAT?.

Susie: oh, wow, I know the answer, KILLING YOU.

Gameboll: WELL..

(Gameboll change his face to Susie's).

Gameboll/"Susie" (Mockingly): HEY, LOOK AT ME, I'M A FATASS GIRL WITH A FATASS BOOTS AND A FATASS AX AND A FATASS EVERYTHING.

Susie: H-hey, The hell.

Stop that.

Ralsei: Umm, excuse me sir-.

Gameboll: WELL FOR YOU FLUFFY ONE, MY NAME IS GAMEBOLL.

G A M E B O L L.

HERE.

I SPELL IT FOR YOU.

Ralsei: Mr. Gameboll, I hate to annoy you but could you please-.

(Gameboll change his face to Ralsei's).

Gameboll/"Ralsei" (mockingly): OHHH YES, LET'S ALL PUT OUR DIFFERENCES ASIDE AND BECOME FRIENDS.

WALKING IN THE FIELDS OF LOVE AND FRIENDSHIP.

(Gameboll change his face back).

Gameboll: YOUR TYPE MAKES ME SICK.

AND WHAT ABOUT YOU?, KRIS.

(Gameboll change his face to Kris's).

...

...

......

(Gameboll change his face back).

Gameboll: YOU HAVE NO LIFE.

NO EMOTIONS, NO EXPRESSION, NOTHING AT ALL.

Susie: Ohh let me at him, I'm gonna erase this smile on your face or screen or whatever.

(Susie casted Rude Buster).

(Gameboll dodge it).

Susie: THE HELL.

Gameboll: ARE YOU TRYING TO ATTACK ME?.

I'M THE FASTEST THING ALIVE.

Ralsei: Sir, we don't want to fight, we just want-

Gameboll: NOOO.

NO WAY IN HELL YOU GONNA GET IT.

IF YOU WANT SOME REAL FIGHT.

THEN, LADIES AND GENTLEMEN.

(Gameboll's eyes became red).

YOU GOT ONE.

HEHEHEHEHEHAHAHAHAHAHA.

(Battle starts).

(Some time after the battle).

(*You can hear someone calling you).

Gameboll (Whispering): PSS, KRIS, HEY, OH YOU SAW ME...

.....

HA HA PERFECT.

NO, SORRY ABOUT WHAT HAPPENED EARLIER.

WELL, IT SOUND PRETTY WEIRD BUT... I NEED YOUR HELP.

WELL, YOU SEE THIS BIG, TALL TOWER THERE?

WELL, THERE IS SOMETHING INSIDE IT.

SOMETHING BELONG TO ME.

BUT HEY.

YOU CAN"T GO THERE...

UNLESS YOU HAVE ONE OF MIKE'S MEN'S ID.

BUT I HAVE A ONE.

I STOLE IT FROM ONE OF EM.

SO ALL YOU GOTTA DO; TAKE THE I.D CARD, SHOW IT TO THE SENTRY, GET TO THE TOP OF THE TOWER AND BRING ME THE G.CHEAT.

OK.

HERE IS THE ID CARD.

(*Gameboll gives you the I.D card).

Gameboll: I COUNT ON YOU, BUDDY.

AND THANK YOU FOR THAT.

(You returned to Gameboll with the G.Cheat.

Gameboll: OHHH DAMN, IT'S REALLY IT!!!.

GOOD JOB FRIEND.

NOW.

CAN YOU PLEASE GIVE IT TO ME?.

(You Give Gameboll the G.Cheat).

Gameboll: YES, YEAH.

IT'S MINE, AT LEAST.

OH AND FOR YOU KRIS.

I GOT AHHH, THIS, THIS STRANGE THING THAT I DIDN'T EXACTLY KNOW ABOUT IT.

YOU MAY TAKE IT AS A THANKS.

(You Got the strange Mentle).

Gameboll: SEE YA AROUND.

(Gameboll leaves).

(You entered the dark room, it's very dark here).

(*The power of Darkness shines Your way).

????: YOU THINK SO?

(Suddenly, kris got attacked by unseen force).

(Gameboll's faces displays in the darkness, with evil smile in his face).

Gameboll: HELLO KRIS.

WHAT'S THE PROBLEM?, BEEN ATTACKED BY ABSOLUTELY NOTHING??.

HEHEHAHAHAHAHA.

OH KRIS, IF YOU JUST KNOW HOW MUCH I'VE WAITED FOR THIS.

FINALLY, WITH THIS POWER.

I CAN FINALLY SEE THEIR FACE.

I LEAVE THIS GAME THAT WE ALL CALL IT A "WORLD".

HEHEHEHAHAHAHAHAHA.

OH, YOU ARE STRUGGLING, DON'T YOU.

WHAT YOU GIVEN ME WAS A CHEATING TOOL, YOUR GODDAMN BROTHER USE IT ONCE, AND AFTER THAT, I KNEW THAT I CAN WHATEVER I WANT WITH THIS POWER.

BUT HERE IS SOMETHING; IT'S NOT ENOUGH. THAT'S WHY I'M GONNA TAKE YOUR SOUL, KRIS.

I KNOW THAT YOU DON'T WANT IT.

YOU HATE IT TO THE CORE.

AFTER ALL, THIS WORLD IS A GAME, NOTHING REALLY HAPPENS.

THERE'S NO POINT OF SAVING AN NON-EXISTED WORLD

SO WHY DON'T YOU JUST.....

(Two hands appears from the void).

GIVE ME THAT DAMN SOUL ALREADY.

(Susie casted Rude Buster).

(But it rewinded).

(Susie and Ralsei barely dodged the attack).

Susie: damn that was close.

And you.

Leave them alone you damn idiot.

Gameboll: IDIOT, IDIOT.

THAT'S ALL COULD CALL ME?.

AN IDIOT.

WOW.

YOU GUYS ARE A HELLA DUMB.

BUT THERE IS ONE POSITIVE POINT IS THAT.

(The hands back again).

THAT'LL ENJOY TEAR THE LIVING HELL OUT OF YOU...

Ralsei: Wait, Gameboll stop.

HEHAHAHEHWHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHE.

(Gameboll attacks).

(The Shadow Mentle protect you and your friends).

(You green now).

Gameboll "ANGERED": GODDAMMIT.

Susie: ALRIGHT, FREAK, I'M DONE PLAYING AROUND.

Gameboll: ME EITHER.

(The light shines, revealing....).

OMEGA GAMEBOLL: BUT THIS ONE LAST GAME IS GONNA BE A BLAST.

HEHEHEHEHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH.

(Battle starts).

(Check: OMEGA GAMEBOLL 999 ATK 999 DEF, THE PRINCE OF THIS WORLD'S ULTIMATE DEATH).

[zoradementio]

Why The Vessel Is The Knight (at least I think)

Hey Every!!! It’s me!!! Every Buddy’s Favorite [Inactive Blog] and [Salesman Fanatic]!!!

With the third year anniversary of Deltarune Chapter 2/eighth year anniversary of Undertale having come and passed, I feel like we’re all a bit antsy about what will happen in the future chapters of Deltarune. (Basically the only reason I’m typing this out is I need to scream a little in the Deltarune void). One of the biggest mysteries thus far is the identity of the character only known as the Knight. While many of the candidates – like Kris, the Mayor, or Papyrus – are fairly convincing for the role, I personally am fully convinced it is one person in particular:

The Vessel.

And let me tell you why.

1. The Vessel never gets thrown away.

This bit of evidence is more of a situation of noticing an odd specificity in the code that may or may not actually be used and is just there to prevent the whole game crumbling. Lest we forget the thirteen exact same images of Jockington’s talksprite. Regardless.

I’m sure we’re all aware of the character creator at the beginning of the game and how in the end it all gets discarded, right? However, I assume fewer of us are aware that this isn’t entirely accurate. Others have found that the game actually saves the information of the Vessel. Particularly, the name of the Vessel is stored in the same area as the player’s name. Plus, if a player starts directly from Chapter 2, not only is the Vessel given the last name used in the data but it is also given every first choice in the character creator – with the exception of the gift which it’s given mind. It seems strange how, if the Vessel is supposed to be completely discarded, why the game would bother saving any of the choices made during the character creator. Hell, even just saving the name alone is strange enough.

The assumption here is that the game, for one reason or another, needs to pull up this information. This hints, then, that the Vessel will come into play at some point. But just this information does not immediately prove that the Vessel is going to be the Knight specifically. But this leads me to…

2. Determination

One of the few things we know about the dark fountains at this point is that they can only be opened when someone with enough Determination. Now, considering this is coming from Queen who typically Capitalizes Every Word In Her Sentences, it’s unclear if she’s just speaking about determination the emotion/feeling or capital D(termination) the actual substance. But considering how big of a role Determination had in Undertale and how Deltarune has done everything in its power to dance around using the word, it is not an unreasonable assumption that this is in fact the Determination that was present in Undertale.

With that being said, if it does require Determination to open the fountains, then it’s unlikely that a monster could open a dark fountain like Queen assumes. After all, we do know that Queen has information blind spots. She herself states “I’m Just A Computer LMAO I Don’t Know Everything”. Considering in the Deltarune universe Alphys is just a teacher and not a scientist, the substance known as Determination has not been discovered. And since that information then wouldn’t be public information, Queen wouldn’t be aware of the workings of Determination (considering most of Queen’s knowledge likely comes from public, online databases). 

Plus, we do have evidence that monsters are unable to handle Determination in Deltarune. Namely, the graveyard. In Undertale, it’s stated one of the side effects of Determination is that it allows for corpses to exist for extended periods of time. This is the explanation as to why monsters turn to dust upon death, as their lack of Determination prevents their body from keeping its form. And in Deltarune, when speaking with Father Alvin, he explains that monster burial rights involve sprinkling the dust of the deceased on an item of symbolic significance. This directly displays that Deltarune monsters also can’t keep a substantial corpse, and thus are unable to withstand substantial levels of Determination.

With all that being said, the need for Determination implies that only humans can (safely) open a dark fountain. And the only time we have seen a fountain being opened successfully was with Kris at the end of Chapter 2. Now, at this point this points to the idea of Kris being the Knight. However, I am very skeptical of this notion. Namely, the fact that it seems pretty early to drop such a big reveal that ‘the main character is actually the antagonist’. Plus, the save file that Kris makes between Chapters 1 and 2 shows that only fifteen minutes passed – which is a short period of time to make a dark fountain in a building that’s almost across town from their house, wolf down an entire pie, and then go back to bed with their soul returned to their body. And finally, when Toby Fox talked years back about an idea for an intro cutscene to Deltarune, he mentions how the final shot would be the Fun Gang running up to the Knight, which would cause some logistical issues if Kris is the Knight (unless the cutscene was meant to be symbolic).

So then, what other humans do we have? The Vessel, of course. After all, the Vessel is very specifically meant to be a human. So it is reasonable to assume that the Vessel is perfectly capable of doing anything a human would be able to do. And considering Kris takes out their soul to open the dark fountain and the Vessel is presumably a body without a soul, that leads into my third and final bit of evidence.

3. The Fountain’s Will and Mother 3

I’m sure we know how much the Earthbound/Mother series inspired Toby Fox’s games. With that being said, the Vessel turning out to be the Knight brings to mind similarities to the Masked Man in Mother 3. For those unaware of the plot of Mother 3, I’ll give a brief synopsis.

In Mother 3, for the seventh chapter of the game you play as Lucas. The goal is to go around the island to pull out seven needles keeping the Dark Dragon asleep. However, another person is also trying to pull the needles. This being the Masked Man – who you actually find out later is Lucas’ twin brother Claus brought to life as an unfeeling husk.

Now, the idea of the main antagonist being a husk of a human is an obvious parallel to the Vessel. Like I mentioned above, the Vessel is a body that – thus far – doesn’t have a soul. Plus, the idea of someone who was supposed to be a supposed ally and hero turning into the main opposing force to us is also similar. But there’s one more similarity to the Masked Man that the Knight seems to share, even without the idea that the Vessel is the Knight.

See, in Mother 3, it’s established that whoever pulls a needle imposes their heart – or will – onto the Dragon. If someone’s good, then the Dragon will be good. If someone’s evil, then the Dragon will in turn become evil. However, it’s noted that when the Masked Man pulls a needle, nothing is imposed. There is no will that the Masked Man has to speak of, so the Dragon doesn’t inherit any sort of intent either.

Meanwhile, in Deltarune, we are told multiple times that the dark fountains have a ‘will’ to them. It is this will that not only creates the Dark Worlds, but also is the purpose that the rulers of these Dark Worlds enact. There’s an odd thing about that fact, however. Namely, the fact that it seems that the person making the fountain has multiple ‘wills’. Or, more accurately, that whatever will is given to the fountains can be easily influenced after the fact, if it even exists at all. King and Queen both assume certain motives of the Knight. King thinks that the Knight wants to bring the Darkners out from obscurity while Queen thinks the Knight wants to spread dark fountains to create a glorious utopia free of boredom. It seems relatively unlikely that both motives of the Knight are true, especially with the actual consequences of opening too many dark fountains. But what’s even more interesting is that both of these wills are mostly just King and Queen projecting their own wants on the Knight.

This leads credence to the idea that either the Knight is multiple people with multiple motives or the Knight is someone who has no concrete motives which allows for the Darkners who rule their Dark Worlds to assume their own will upon them. The Vessel would be the best singular character to fulfill this quality, as they likely won’t have a will of their own to imprint upon the fountains.

But, of course, all of this is just a theory. I’m perfectly capable of being incorrect in all of this. Besides, if all this is true, then that could mean that ~it was actually Gaster who was the true villain, controlling the Vessel all along~ which I’m less stoked about. Anyway, if there’s anything I got wrong/misremembered do let me know.

[crystalelemental]

Datamine today, but other than OG Valerie getting an EX at Pokemas day, I dunno if there's anything else you're interested in.

There's SS Piers and SS Roxie, Ryuki is finally scoutable. For Eevee day, there's Penny, Eevee Kid NPC from Galar, and Elaine. Variety Eevee is getting a rerun alongside new Eevee variety units of Elio and Selene, High Score Fire event is gonna be at November. The banner for high score is SS Morty and SS May.

Eevee eggmons are interesting, they all have the field effect corresponding to their types, but I think they're all tech. Which means F2P Dark Zone and Ice Zone.

Grid expansion is OG Leaf, Champion Iris, and OG Grimsley. OG Leaf can finally buff crit with her trainer move! But I haven't looked at the other two. There's also SS Diantha and Anabel rerun.

There's also a new type of banner called Mix scout. It's described in the producer letter as a banner that can carry over the scout points but only with paid gems.

Lastly, Kalos VA is getting a rerun, there'll be upcoming chapter about the mysterious stone. Pokemas day's master fair rerun is Champion Serena, buddy moves got their names revised.

Sync grids: https://twitter.com/absolutelypm/status/1717793155897282671

Unit details: https://twitter.com/absolutelypm/status/1717779828307525935

Yeah it’s kind of a bummer of a month overall, but I’m not too upset by it. Roxie kinda rules, that kit is great and I kinda want it for Eevee Kris purposes. Penny I haven’t looked over but I’m definitely getting her because Paldea fan. The Valerie EX is my everything. Leaf got Crit Squad so it’s over. Champion Iris kinda got supremely fucked over, this is a terrible expansion. Glad they slightly buffed Grimsley but not enough to make him matter.

The Eevee eggs sound cool but only if Tech. Support eggmon with field effect is Bad. Selene and Elio finally got alts but this sure didn’t work in my favor, hoping for a better Espeon down the line. Elaine…kinda infuriated me. I hate Let’s Go, I think it’s the worst game by functionality, just absolutely miserable to experience, and wanted it to get nothing. Now that door’s open, so fuck me I guess. Couldn’t just stick with the good modern games, we had to backpedal into crap. Wonderful. Watch the kit be good so I’ll feel compelled to pull.

But nowhere near as mad as Mix Scout. Oh, paid gems but you can only pull a limited number of times? So we might not even hit pity unless we were pulling ahead of time. Wretched mechanic. I hope whoever made this dies one thousand deaths. And they had the fucking audacity to make it a Red alt. Disgusting.

Still reading up. More thoughts eventually. But yeah this month is super disappointing to me. Hopefully we’re back on Hisui next month.