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#oh and for some explanation of why he would think this: two of the main characters of the story are george & jenny‚ the latter of which i
czolgosz · 1 year
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the worst thing that ever happened to me was when i was explaining the plot of "the happy hypocrite" (an 1897 short story that's sort of an adaptation of the picture of dorian gray) to my sister and my father thought i was talking about "some demented potter fic" ☹️
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vm-haunts · 17 days
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Silly prompt idea for dead on main (that's the ship name for Danny and Jason, right?):
Justice league is hosting a charity Halloween party, so they have people in the league, and associates of league members fill out surveys on things to include and what scary things might get added to the haunted house portion. One of the questions is a generic "what is something that scares you?" Some answers are normal things you would expect from league members, like kryptonite or a particularly unnerving villain
Until you get to the bat family. Everyone other than Batman and Red Hood has put "Red Hood's boyfriend" and when asked why the responses are along the lines of
"he can CONSISTENTLY sneak up on me" -Damian and Cassandra
"he can mess up my tech with just a slip in his control of his powers" -Tim
"everyone else was doing it, so I thought it was a bit" -Dick, Duke, and Barbara
Oh that's gonna make Danny's day when he found out. Y'all think I'm spooky?! 🤯 I'm so flattered! Death goal of a ghost tbh, become the worst fear of the bats (that they'll publicly admit).
Then Batman and Red Hood put down 'Jack', and people are like, who's this a rogue? A new supervillain? While both of them are having in-laws flashbacks and shuddering, saying 'someone you don't wanna meet', and people are Concerned™
Also it could go two ways when people finally met Danny. Either they met him as Phantom and, oh he's the sweetest boy ever what do you mean the bats fears him? Or they met Danny Fenton and oh gods that boy sure is hitting every uncanny valley there is, no wonder.
Also also Danny's fear would definitely be 'siblings', and the bat clan all nods along like no explanation needed valid fear.
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rose-pearls · 9 months
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Ciao potresti fare Luke castellan x fem reader dove il lettore fa ingelosire Luke ? Grazie !
Hi! I loved this request so here it is! Hopefully you like it :))
I am also thinking of writing for Clarisse so if you have any request you can always send them!
Request: a Luke x reader where the reader makes Luke jealous
Main taglist: @avada-kedavra-bitch-187, @nyx2021, @thestarspangledcaptain, @kmc1989 (open for every fandom)
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The Camp had been plain chaos in the last few days, the reason for that was capture the flag. The infamous game had taken place yesterday and the blue team had once again won, with Annabeth as your leader. The girl was smart, but you also had the best swordman on her team.
Luke Castellan. You had fallen for the boy the moment you met him, but he never seemed to reciprocate the feelings. He was handsome, everyone with eyes could see that but he was also kind and sweet. He had helped you a lot when you arrived, feeling lost until your mother, Athena claimed you. After being claimed the two of you still talked a little bit but not as much.
“Oh, Luke you are so funny.”, you hear Claire say as she starts to giggle and curling a whisp of hair around her finger. The boy soaks up the attention of course, smirking back at her.
“I can see you glaring at her, maybe try to be more subtle,” you hear Annie say, making you look at her and let out a groan.
“I know, I really am an idiot, right? To believe that something could happen with him,” the younger girl looks conflicted at your words, but you shake your head.
“There you two are, I have been looking for you everywhere,” Percy says as he drops on the seat next to Annabeth, making the two of you looking at him with wide eyes.
“We are literally at a table in the middle of the camp, how hard can it be to find us?”, Annie asks him, and you can’t help but laugh quietly as the two of them start to bicker again, they really were like an old married couple.
You hear the same annoying giggle once again and try not to smash your potatoes even harder, but the jealousy seems to be reaching a boiling point. It was stupid to feel like this, particularly when nothing had happened between you and the Hermes boy. The girl was also a daughter from Aphrodite, she was stunning.
The clearing of a throat makes you look up and you find Annie and Percy looking at you with equally worried gazes.
“What?”, you can’t help but ask, feeling self-conscious at the stares.
“I think that you just mashed these potatoes even more then I thought was possible,” Annie says, and you look at your previously mashed potatoes who were now looking a bit liquid.
“Remind me to never be on your bad side,” Percy says, and you shake your head in response, a sigh leaving your lips.
“Sorry, I just had something on my mind,” you tell them, hoping that the two of them would drop the subject but you were in front of Annie and Percy, so it wasn’t going to happen.
“Is that something, the blond Aphrodite daughter hanging off Luke’s arm?”, Percy asks, and Annabeth slaps him with a glare making him look at her with wide eyes.
“It is. Don’t get me wrong I’m sure she is a great girl but yes, it is them on my mind and her giggling every five seconds,” you tell them, making the two of them looking at you in sympathy. 
“Why don’t you make him jealous?”, Percy asks, and both Annabeth and you turn to look at the boy with wide eyes.
“Wait what?”, you can’t help but ask, waiting for some more explanation.
“It doesn’t seem like Luke is really interested in the conversation they are having, but every time he sees you turn around, he flashes her a dazzling smile. So, play his game and show him that you can also flirt with other people,” Annabeth looks unhappy with Percy’s answer, but you can’t help but think it through, maybe it would show you if he could possibly be interested or not.
“You’re right,” you say suddenly, cutting off the two.
“Wait what?”
“Really?”, Percy can’t help but ask before a proud smile appears on his lips, making Annie scoff.
“You can’t really be entertaining his stupid idea!”, you say but you shrug your shoulders.
“I need to know if he is interested or not, otherwise I’ll turn crazy. This way I know and if he isn’t I can move on,” you tell her calmly while she looks at you with wide eyes.
“I can’t believe you are doing this,” she says, and you roll your eyes at her words.
“We can’t all have a Percy looking at us with puppy dog eyes,” you tell her with a wink, while the boy seems to wake up from his gazing, a scarlet brush coating his cheeks.
“Now, the only thing I need to find is the person to make Luke jealous with,” Annabeth sighs but a playful smirk is playing on her lips.
“I know one person that will drive him mad,” this makes both Percy, and you turn to look at her.
“Who?”, Percy and you ask at the same time.
“Max, from the Apollo cabin. They arrived at the same time and there has always been some kind of rivalry between the two of them,” the whispers as the three of you are huddled together to prevent someone overhearing. 
“Wait, isn’t that the guy who nearly beat Luke with the sword?”, Percy asks, and you try to remember the last time there was a contest.
“Keyword, nearly,” Annabeth says, still Luke’s number one supporter.
“That is perfect!”, you say and the two of them look at you with suspicious eyes.
“What do you mean?”, Percy asks after a moment.
“I’m going to ask Max for some pointers on my sword fighting, that way I can get close to him for a reason, and it is also something that will get Luke’s attention.”
“He will go crazy seeing Max giving you some directions,” Annabeth says, looking unsure but there is a sparkle of mischief in her eyes.
“Alright team let’s get this quest on the road,” Percy says excitedly, and you can’t help but laugh.
“Now you are going to Max and the both of us will make sure that Luke is watching!”, Percy tells you as he starts pushing you off your seat.
“Good luck!”, Annie yells and you glare at her as a few campers look at you.
You try to nervously put your shirt right and your hair a bit better before telling yourself that this was ridiculous and just marching towards Max.
“Max, hi,” the boy turns to look at you, he looks surprised but then again you never really talked.
“Hi, what brings you here?”, he asks kindly, and you let out a nervous laugh.
“You are probably going to think that I am crazy, but I need some tips on sword fighting? I’m not really the best with the sword and capture the flag is in a few weeks.”, you tell him, feeling suddenly incredible stupid.
The boy seems unsure for a moment before a charming smile comes up.
“Of course, I’ll try to help you in the best way I can. Although I must say I’m surprised that you didn’t asked Luke for some pointers,” you knew he was going to ask this, after all you had never really interacted with him.
“Well, he is quite busy, you know knew kids coming in, the Hermes cabin and then Claire,” you say and Max nods in understanding.
“Lucky for you I have all afternoon,” he says, suddenly closer than he had been before, making you look up into his dazzling blue eyes.
“Here’s your sword,” he whispers, and you clear your throat before taking it.
“Thank you!”, you say, trying to keep your voice normal but it comes out a little squeaky.
--
“This is even better than a movie,” Percy says while Groover nods in agreement.
“Athena girl has enough of the Hermes boy flirting with other girls, so she goes and take a chance on an Apollo boy. Will the Hermes boy realize what he is losing, or will she end up with the Apollo boy?”, Groover whispers and Percy snorts at the words, while Annabeth shakes her head, a smile on her lips.
“Well looks like we won’t have to wait too long how that will end.”, she says as she sees Luke marching, or stomping, towards the two teenagers who had been talking. She had seen Luke looking at her half-sister for some time now but as Max put his hands on her waist to put her in position it seemed too much for Luke.
“And there goes the Hermes boy!”, Percy whispers, the three of them looking with avid attention.
“What in the Gods name are you three watching like a television show? And is that popcorn?”, Clarisse says, for once not looking like she wants to murder them.
“We are watching that show,” Groover says while pointing at Luke arriving towards the two others.
“Oh shit, this is going to be good. Move your little asses I want front row to Max getting his ass beaten,” Clarisse says with a smirk, but not before stealing some popcorn.
“It is getting heated,” Annabeth says, feeling unsure for once at the decision she made of letting you go towards the Apollo boy.
“Luke tries to push him but no of course she gets between them.”, Clarisse says, looking disappointed that the Hermes boy hadn’t slapped the Apollo kid. 
Max tries to put his hand on your shoulder while speaking but before he can Luke brings you to his side, putting you behind him and glaring at the boy in front of him.
“Touch her again and this time I will cut your hand off,”, they hear Luke say in a warning tone making them all let out a collective gasp.
“Get him Castellan!”, Clarisse yells suddenly, making the three teenagers look into your direction.
“Shit he saw us, time to go!”, Percy yells and the four manage to scramble away before the Hermes boy can turn his frustration towards them.
--
“Luke, will you calm down please. He was just giving me pointers.”, she says for the second time, but he can’t find it himself to calm down.
The boy had his hands on her, and he can’t stop seeing his flirty smile and her shy one.
“Fine. I’ll leave you two then.”, he says, feeling so angry that he just wants to rip everything to shreds.
“Common, Luke,” he hears her say and silently he hopes that she is following him, and that she didn’t chose to stay with the idiot.
He feels her hand on his arm and stops as she lets out a sigh.
“Will you stop and talk for a moment?”, she says, and he takes a deep breath before turning around.
“Don’t you have a sword lesson to follow?”, he says, unable to hide the sarcasm at the words.
“I simply asked him because you were too busy flirting with Claire,” the name of the Aphrodite girl is said with a certain disdain, that Luke recognizes all too well from his own thoughts about Max.
“Are you jealous?”, the girl scoffs but Luke can’t help the wide smile that appears at her embarrassment.
“Like you weren’t just throwing a hissy fit over there for the whole camp,” she bites back and Luke chuckles in response, getting closer to her.
“I was jealous, I can openly admit that. Nearly wanted to rip his head from his body for barely touching your waist,” he admits, watching her eyes widen in surprise and with something else. 
“Fine, I was jealous about Claire and the attention you were giving her,” she says, looking like she wanted to say anything but that. Luke smiles as he gets even closer to her and brings his arm around her waist, making her look at him in surprise.
“I wasn’t interested in her, I just wanted to see how you reacted to me talking with her and I have to say it was quite the show,” the girl looks at him with wide eyes.
“You dick! I thought you were interested in her!”, she exclaims, and Luke can’t help but laugh at her words.
“How could I be interested in her when I have you in the back of my mind all the time,” he whispers, smelling her perfume as he got even closer to her.
“Good thing I haven’t been able to think about anyone else either,” she whispers back, and Luke can’t help but feel revived at the words.
“Max?”, he asks, wanting to make sure that she wasn’t just confused.
“It was a plan to make you jealous,” she whispers, her cheeks heating up in embarrassment and after a moment Luke realizes what she just said.
“You little minx, and I thought you were innocent!”, the words make her laugh as she curls her arms around his neck.
“I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have done that. Although it was fun to see you act all protective over me,” she whispers while biting her lip and Luke can’t help but look at her soft lips. 
“You drive me crazy darling,” he tells her before bringing her into a kiss, he holds her waist tightly and lets out a soft moan as she cards her fingers through his hair.
Unbeknownst to them five other campers are celebrating behind the trees.
“I told you this would work!”, Percy says, and Annabeth can’t help but agree.
“I thought he was going to rip my head off,” Max says, and the others snort in response.
“You were lucky she was there buddy,” Groover says while patting Max on the back.
“I don’t know about you guys but watching them kiss is not really my thing, let’s move out,” the others quickly agree at Annabeth’s words and leave their hiding place to go to the lake, leaving the two lovebirds alone.
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honeydazai · 1 year
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⁎ ˚ ˚୨୧⋆。˚ ⋆ ᴛᴏᴏ ᴇᴀɢᴇʀ ᴛᴏ ᴜɴᴅʀᴇꜱꜱ
feat.: Dazai, Chūya, Ranpo, Kunikida, Fukuzawa, Fyodor, Nikolai, Mushitarō, Jōno
content: f!reader, nsfw content, clothed sxx, degradation, teasing, dry humping, thigh riding, semi public sxx, cxm on clothing (don't mind the x.. perhaps it won't get labeled with a cxmmunity note then?)
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Whether you initiate making out with him in one of the storage rooms of the Agency or you're simply along for the ride really doesn't matter, given how DAZAI will tease you mercilessly anyway. His lips curl into a smug smile when you grind against his thigh, pressed flush against his body, head resting against his shoulder, and his taunting words are as sugary sweet as they're mercilessly cruel.
He urges you to continue, thigh muscles flexing underneath you and giving you a hard surface to grind again, and he chuckles when you cry out, all but aching for him to touch you instead, for slim fingers to slip underneath your skirt and into your panties. Unfortunately for you, he quite likes watching you get more and more desperate the longer you're unable to come by yourself.
“Having trouble, love? My, my, you're too cute when you whine like that. Why don't you try again, hm? I'm certain you'll be able to come if you just rut against me long enough.”
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Honestly, CHŪYA is not too fond of having actual sex while still dressed. It's fine for making out, exchanging hungry kisses, your hands wandering underneath his clothes as much as his are on your bare skin, but, in his opinion, that's when the next part should follow, which is tearing said clothing off each other. Still, he does understand why you'd be too impatient to wait and, this time, would prefer to just get to the main event; it is kind of hot that you're still dressed when he stretches you open on two fingers, some of your arousal dripping down onto your skirt.
He's so hard it's becoming painful with how tight his trousers suddenly seem and your heels dig into his shoulders, but he's not about to complain, not when you clench tightly around his fingers and whine for him to please just fuck you properly and, well, he doesn't think he'd have the patience to undress either of you right now. He's all throaty groans when he pushes his trousers only down far enough to get his dick out, immediately pushing into your tight heat, moaning in the process and, before he can spare your sharp heels any more thoughts, he's rasping out praises about how good you feel around him.
“God—, you're so damn tight, fuck. Hah, guess this was a good idea after all. Seeing you all fucked out in your everyday clothes is a cute look.”
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KUNIKIDA prefers to do things slowly and thoroughly, to have enough time to gently take you apart and build you back up, to make you come on his fingers before he actually fucks you — but, occasionally, he struggles when it comes to denying you. That's the only explanation he has as for why you're all but making out in the Agency's office, empty except for the two of you, with you pinned against his desk, wood digging into your lower back and lips meeting in a desperate kiss.
You can't really pretend to care about the mild discomfort, not when he moans so sweetly into the kiss as you press your palm against his dick, straining against the fabric of his trousers, and your lips curl into a smirk at his weakening protests about someone walking in and seeing you like this. The way his cock twitches at the idea certainly doesn't seem like he minds the thought.
“We need to be—, ah, quick about this, darling. Both of us would lose our jobs if someone caught us doing this, in the office no less. Oh—, that was good. Do that again, please—, ah, God. You are too irresistible.”
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RANPO is quite fond of it whenever the both of you get too impatient to actually undress and make out properly, instead settling on rutting against each other, his hard dick rubbing against your cunt even through the layers of your clothes, the pressure causing both of you to moan softly. It's a quick and effective way for you to get each other off, especially when the situation doesn't quite call for it; the restrooms in the police station, especially while he's waiting for Minoura to return and drive you to some crime scene, really isn't the best place to have actual sex, after all.
If you get too loud, he's quick to push two fingers between your lips and into your mouth, giving you something to busy yourself with while you grind against each other, panting and moaning. It wouldn't be a good look for the Agency if you were found making out while on the job, after all. Occasionally, when he doesn't want to do any work at all, he merely lets you sit on his lap in the office, you rutting down against his cock, whining that it's not enough — if you beg sweetly enough, he'll gladly help you out and slip his hand into your panties. Though it might take a while; you sound awfully cute when pleading, after all.
“Ah, I'm not sure whether you deserve my help yet, love. Why don't you beg me some more, hm? Perhaps I'll change my mind. We'll see. Just do your best for now, will you? I'm quite enjoying the show.”
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While JŌNO isn't opposed to the idea of thigh riding — not at all, even; go right ahead, he certainly won't stop you —, he's mean about it. His smirk stretches wide across his lips, as condescending as can be, as you try and pleasure yourself through grinding down against his leg, strong muscle firm underneath you. Occasionally, the angle is just right, the fabric of your panties rubbing against your throbbing clit, providing delicious friction, causing you to whine softly, back arched.
His voice drips with amusement as he calls you a slut, a needy whore even, his words all too cruel until your face feels hot with embarrassment, though it's not like you can stop — literally, because he's got his hands on your hips, moving your body for you, pulling you down against him in a steady rhythm. When you get too comfortable, he makes sure to bounce his thigh a little, relishing in the high-pitched cries you let out at the sudden change in angle.
“I have to admit, you're adorable. Really, I knew you were needy before, but that you're as insatiable as to rut against me like a bitch in heat — that's cute. How about this; if you manage to make yourself come in the next minute, I'll fuck you properly afterwards. If you don't, well; that'd be a shame. It'd seem like you're not grateful for my thigh, then.”
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Naturally, FUKUZAWA has quite a lot of patience; it's one of the many qualities that come with the job, whether he wanted it or not. Still, despite all that self-control, he occasionally just can't help but indulge you when you keep on whining about wanting him. His office, the door leading to it heavy, gives an illusion of privacy, at least, which is why he assumes it's not that bad, not quite as lewd as it could be, when you sink down on his dick, a soft moan falling from your lips as he bottoms out inside of you.
You've merely opened his yukata enough to get his cock out, your own skirt convenient, panties pushed to the side instead of pulled off fully; it's messy, but both of you are eager as you rise up on your knees, setting a steady rhythm of up and down, up and down, the head of his dick catching on your hole before it can slip out fully. The friction has both of you moaning, his raspy groans a contrast to your soft mewls, even as you try and stifle your noises in his shoulder — the Agency's walls are as thin as paper, after all.
“Quiet, dear. I don't wish for anyone but me to hear you like this. Those cute noises of yours are reserved for my ears only, understood? .. Good. Good girl. Keep that pace up, now. I'm close already. Come together with me.”
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FYODOR is a busy man, that much you're aware of. Still, you can't quite help but miss him, especially when he spends all day hauled up in his office — if you can even call the room that, dark and gloomy as it is, with merely the shine of many computer screens illuminating it —, working on things that are too important, on plans that are too big for you to fully grasp. Luckily, you're able to settle on a compromise, for when you merely need his touch — even though his legs are thin, his lap is quite comfortable when you cuddle up close to him — and for when you need him in other ways, too.
He doesn't mind it particularly much when you grind your hips down against skinny thighs, moaning softly and burying your head in his shoulder while he continues to work, the soft clacking noises of his keyboard a steady background noise you at least try and focus on. Occasionally, one hand of his moves to rest on the curve of your waist, gently caressing you before being taken away again and, even though the occasional friction against your clit when you catch a good angle feels heavenly, you doubt you'll be able to come like this — especially since the rule of you having to be lowkey about it and not disrupting his work had fallen from pale lips.
“Ah, ah — mind the movement, darling. I am certain you do not want me to accidentally press a random button; who knows what might happen, hm? Perhaps it would be a catastrophical event, triggered by your needy behaviour alone. Slow down, dear.”
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NIKOLAI is rather eager — really, can you blame him when you run around looking cute all day? He just wants to ruin you so badly; you absolutely can blame him, naturally, but you won't, given how he's awfully good at getting what he wants, and it's no surprise that, soon enough, you find yourself pinned to the wall in some hallway, his hips pushing against the curve of your ass, his dick pressing against you. He doesn't bother to stay quiet and encourages you to be as loud as you wish, too; so what if someone walks in on you? He certainly doesn't mind.
The dry humping has mewls and whines falling from your lips, with you trying hard to brace your hands on the wall in order not to be completely forced against it; Nikolai groans and moans into your ear, warm breath against your neck, your back arching in pleasure. Of course, he's not content just making out with you — the moment he's close, he's quick to open his trousers just a bit, enough so that he can come onto your lower back, successfully staining your clothes and giggling about how utterly ruined you look.
“Ah, ah, look at you, you're so cute, doll—, that's a nice view. A good look on you indeed, hm; perhaps I should mark you up like that more often, yes? Ah, I wonder what you'll do now; I'm afraid everyone will know just what we got up to. My, my, that's quite troublesome for you.”
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It's really not your fault that MUSHITARŌ is quite this handsome — so much, even, that you just can't wait until you're home —, though, with the way his eyes narrow at you when you grind your hips down against his thin thigh again, it's obvious he seems to disagree. Still, his cheeks are flushed a lovely pink colour and his hands settle on your hips when you whine softly, curling into him, cheek resting against his shoulder as you rut against him.
He's equally as eager as you are, yet hesitant to admit it, though there's no hiding the way his dick strains against his trousers. The sight of you getting yourself off using his thigh, sitting on his lap in a room that, for now, is empty yet with an unlocked door — God, someone could walk in at all times —, unfortunately gets to him, too; the moment you push your hand into his underwear and wrap it around his dick, he whimpers, the noise high-pitched, eyes squeezed shut, all previous complaints dying on his tongue and, while he pretends to scrunch his nose up at the wet stain your arousal left on his thigh, dripping into expensive fabric, his cock merely twitches again in your hand with mild interest.
“Ah—, I'm afraid my suit deserves a proper wash after this. How am I going to cover the stain up until we're home, hm? I'm not complaining—, stop mocking me. I do not sound like that. Naturally I enjoyed this, too — you must have noticed that much.”
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notes: SEASON 5!!!! EPISODE 1!!! TELL ME YOUR THOUGHTS!!!!! also i listened to dance the night away from the barbie movie while writing this. good song
requested?: yes!
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Text
Batfam x GN!Bat!Reader.
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Summary: Bruce had another kid in Arkham asylum that nobody knows about.
Warnings: Murder, Arkham asylum, Reader can see the dead, Bruce being a bad father, hallucinations, delusions
Yes, I know that a psychiatric visit wouldn't go like this, I also know that hallucinations don't normally work like this, but it's a fictional world with a bat inspired vigilante, use your imagination.
Part one
~☆~
"Bruce, what the fuck!" Tim had yelled as he ran into the Manor.
Dick had abandoned the thought of taking Damian and going to get both Tim and Jason. Even if they showed up at the asylum with proof that they were your adoptive siblings and half sibling, they would still have a slim chance of getting to meet you.
"Calm down, Matster Timothy.." Alfred had tried his best to make the tension die down. He himself only knew of you from the brief explanation Bruce gave him five years ago.
"Calm down?!"
"Listen, I mean I could go in there with my badge and get to at least meet them." Dick proposed, searching his brain for a way to meet you.
"Yeah, we all could with our reputations." Jason made himself known by talking about their vigilante personas. He was weirdly calm throughout this entire thing. "Why have you never mentioned them?" Oh, now they could see it. He was acting... he's seething.
"I-" Bruce thought of something to say. "When they were fourteen, their mother was murdered. I was asked to survey the scene, and they had told me about how they weren't even there-"
"Where is this going, father?" Damian interrupted.
"And then we looked inside one of M/N's journals. Y/N has a history of delusions that they fully believe."
"So you shut them out because of that?" Tim asked, genuinely trying to grasp ahold of what was going on.
"I know that they wouldn't want me in their life, M/N didn't, so why would Y/N?" Bruce sighed.
Jason opened his mouth to speak but was beat by Dick speaking first. "We're going up there. We are going to meet them!"
×
"So you're Y/N's family." Dr. Conley spoke. "Bruce Wayne... I would not have called that."
"Can we see Y/N or not?" Damian asked, boredom evident on his face.
Dr. Conley took in a breath before setting a file on the table in front of herself. "Y/N is plagued by hallucinatory delusions. They believe that they can see the dead."
"Can they? I mean, we have aliens roaming around." It was Dicks turn to speak.
"No, they can't. They claim that two of the "people" they see are named Alice and Mathew, old residents of the asylum." Dr. Conley sighed. "We've never had any residents named Alice and Mathew Hallows."
"Are those her friends?" Tim asked.
"Yes."
×
"Y/N, you have some visitors." Dr. Conley told you, a small smile tugging at her dark skin.
You got up from where you sat, silently gesturing both Alice and Mathew to follow you. Dr. Conley guided you out of the main building and into a sanctuary that you had never been in.
"I'm still in isolation." You told her, afraid that you would get in trouble for being out of your room.
"We've made an exception." She smiled again, now opening up a door for you. As you walked in, you immediately noticed the one face you hoped you'd never see. Bruce Wayne.
And his little ducklings all sitting with him.
Dr. Conley pulled out a chair for you to sit in, but you never noticed that. All you could focus on was Bruce avoiding eye contact.
"Y/N." She snapped you out of your daze, finally letting you sit down. All seven of you sat awkwardly, not muttering a single thing. The boys just gave you small smiles.
Just as Dick was about to say something you spoke.
"You think I killed her, don't you?"
The room remained silent, offering Bruce's avoidance on a silver plater. "I would never, I loved her."
"You don't know what it was like out there, I was hungry, and so was she...I was getting us food-" You cut yourself off as you began shouting. "and when I came back, she was....dead."
Tears had started to unwillingly fall from your eyes, something that Bruce noticed as he finally looked up at you. "And I'm not crazy." You whispered.
You noticed the weary looks that everyone around the room shared. "What?" You asked.
When none of them answered you turned to look at Dr. Conley, taking notice of her frown.
"Y/N.." She whispered, "There are no records of an Alice and Mathew Hallows."
"What?" You laughed.
"We've looked at computer documents and paper documents... they just aren't real."
You looked at everybody in the room, hoping to find a smile on one of their faces, signifying that this was all a joke.
You whipped your body around to face Alice and Mathew. The young man, whom you've grown to know very well, only looked at you with a sorry look, and Alice stared at Dr. Conley with wide eyes.
This couldn't be real. She was lying.
You quickly turned to look at Dr. Conley, before going back to look at Alice and Mathew. This time, Mathew was nowhere to be seen, seemingly having turned to air.
"Y/N, no, she's lying, I'm real!" Alice yelled, grabbing at her face to convince herself.
"I know, I know!" You tried to make her feel better, but the hysteria under your skin started to break free.
"No, I'm real!" She was crying now. "I'm real!"
You turned to look at everyone in the room, about to ask them for help, only to stop yourself when you noticed their wide eyes. You heard Alice's cries die down but never turned to face her again. You were sitting there just staring at the people around the room.
When you came back to your senses you tried to mutter out, "We need to he-" you paused, "-lp her?"
Alice was gone.
~☆~
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I know that people wanted a "holy shit you can see the dead" reaction, but I strive to suprise.
Also, I think I'm going to post a follow-up of this fic, just to see how Y/N's dealing with it and how their relationship with the batbros turns out.
I have another two part Asylum!bat!Reader in the works if you're interested.
Taglist:
@godknows-shetried @cookielovesbook-akie
@kinkmaster96 @sen-nes @bbnny
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moonferry · 3 months
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what type of movies the sdv marriage candidates would watch:
so this is just for funsies, but i decided to brainstorm what types of movies/shows all 12 marriage candidates would watch. there will be a mini-drabble assigned to each one, as a treat. sorry i got a little carried away with some of these. i hope you guys enjoy <3
bachelors:
harvey: he loves romcoms. there is literally no denying it.
i picture him on the farmhouse couch, wrapped in his favorite blanket with a mountain of tissues next to him. you walk in and take "your spot" next to him (which is basically as close to him as humanly possible, your head resting on his shoulder). he leans into your body to acknowledge you're there, but he's too invested in his movie. DEFINITELY a movie crier. "why can't she see that he's the perfect guy for her!!!" absolutely inconsolable during the parts where the love interests are fighting, but then when they finally get together he's like "i knew it!!!" harvey would have a variety of snacks, though most of them are things like apple slices with peanut butter and some assorted nuts. happy to share his opinions about the movie and even ask your input on the love interest(s). for example, if the main love interest has a current partner who is definitely not right for them, he'd be like, "so, you see that persons TOTALLY the wrong one for them, right?" he'd also "take notes" and use what hes learned from these movies to plan romantic dates for the two of you.
elliott: let's all be honest here. he also loves romcoms.
he and harvey have a "book-club" style meeting where they watch a movie and discuss it over tea/coffee. of course, he'd invite you, too. being the romantic - and writer - he is, he spends the entire movie critiquing things and going "oh, well, if i wrote it i'd do it this way-" you love him, even if he does talk over the movie. i also think he'd be the one to bring the most AMAZING array of snacks to a movie night - like full on 3 course meal with dessert. a bit overkill, but what else would you expect? elliott probably gets too invested in the storylines and - if its an ending he doesnt like - will write his "own version" with tweaks. yes, elliott is a part of fandom, sue me! he'd definitely show you the finished script and ask for your input. who knows? maybe elliott will direct his own movie one day - with you as the star, of course.
alex: if you guessed sports movies and gridball games... you'd be completely wrong. i think alex enjoys animated movies - it doesn't really matter the genre. alternatively, i also think he would enjoy westerns.
here me out: everyone always assumes he's like.. sport obsessed, and he is, but thats SOOO boring. i think he does enjoy watching sports, yes, but his favorite movie type is animated. im talking studio ghibli animation. he loves howl's moving castle and makes you watch it with him several times a week. honestly, you aren't entirely sure he doesn't have a crush on christian bale, but like, who could blame him? now for the westerns. from my own personal experience of visiting my grandparents, they watch westerns exclusively. i think living with george and evelyn would have introduced him to the western cowboy film genre and he would have instantly loved it. it's mainly a nostalgia thing - when alex was younger, he'd always sit on george's lap and watch the western movies with his grandfather. evelyn would be making cookies in the kitchen and then bring kid alex a heaping portion. whenever he watches a western now, he feels warm and safe. it reminds him of his childhood. of home.
shane: action comedy
i don't really think this would needs much explanation.. shane just enjoys a good action comedy movie. i think he'd laugh way too loudly. personally, i think he enjoys animated action comedies much more than live action ones (though he'll still watch those). i think his favorite would be kung fu panda, just because he sees himself as po in a way. i think he would supply ample snacks - though most so unhealthy and sugary that they'll make your teeth fall out. he's definitely the type to fall asleep during a movie, cheesy dust coating his fingers and his hands still in the bowl you two were sharing. you just shake your head and place a blanket over him. maybe you even fall asleep, too. that's all fun and games until you somehow knock the bowl off in your sleep and cheese balls spill all over your carpet flooring. oops. it's okay tho! 5 second rule. i also think shane is the type to walk into a room where a movie is playing while he was doing something (ie bringing you something, cleaning, etc), stand at the edge of the room with his arms crossed like he's "not interested", and spend 20 minutes watching before finally sitting down next to you.
sam: thriller movies
oh, sam. sammy sam samson. he's another tough one. theres so many good genres that i think he'd like, so hes sort of a chameleon. he's open to watch any and everything, but he LOVES thriller movies. more specifically, dystopian future thriller movies. he loves anything that's exciting. sorry sam fans, but i think he'd be the type to watch movies EXCLUSIVELY on his busted android phone. he'd also laugh loudly at parts and rewind to show you, but it's not like you can see through all the cracks so you're just like "oh, that's hilarious". sam loves sending you youtube compilations of "funny movie clips" and will be like "yoo, did you see that clip i sent you?" even though sam will watch anything, i think he absolutely despises war movies. even though he knows its just a movie, he can't help himself from imagining his father in that situation. war movies are a definite DO NOT WATCH for him. i think he would buy an entire large pizza for the two of you to share but.. im sorry, but you do NOT get any pizza. boy just eats the whole thing in 2 bites.
sebastian: historical movies
controversial, i know. but i feel like sebastian would love historical movies. growing up with demetrius as a step-father, sebastian always loved learning new things. historical movies allow him to continue to learn new things. now, i don't mean that he loves documentaries, i mean he loves historical FICTION movies. specifically, pirate movies. sebastian definitely is a laptop-only movie watcher. it doesn't matter if the tv is three feet from him, he will not watch something unless its on his laptop. i imagine him sitting on your shared bed, leaning back against the headboard with the laptop on his legs. he'd absolutely lose his mind if you joined him - even letting you hold the laptop, if you want. i think he would melt if you laid your head down on his chest and asked him questions about what he was watching - which he'd be happy to answer. he would definitely start playing with your hair if he seemed to be getting bored of his movie, or maybe he'd just do it without realizing.
bachelorettes:
emily: musicals!!
again, no real explanation needed. girlie loves to sing along - maybe even dance along - to the musical numbers. i think she is a musical theatre fanatic, though she really loves movie musicals. because broadway tickets are like so expensive, she prefers to stay home and watch them with you. she knows all the lyrics and has definitely watched them multiple times. during her favorite numbers, she'd pull you up from the couch and convince you to dance with her. you'd be having the time of your life - even if you didn't really know the lyrics. if you did, the two of you would be singing (well, screaming, really) along to every word.
leah: this one was a bit tough, but i think leah would like fantasy movies.
i really think she would enjoy the movie scenery more than the actual plot, though. like the beauty of the nature, you know? you two would be watching a movie where someone is going on a big, exciting quest and leah would be like "oh, gosh, look at those trees. the coloring is just spectacular." you don't mind, though, because she's right: these fantasy worlds always look so breath-takingly beautiful and it's hard not be captivated by them. i think she'd prefer the artistic aspect to the movies, especially if it's an animated fantasy movie. if it was animated, she'd be absolutely speechless and just in awe of how the animators drew something/someone. what she doesn't realize, though, is that you're looking at her the way she looks at the movie. she just looks so breath-taking and you can't help but smile every time she makes a comment about it. "this movie is so gorgeous" and you would think "but not as gorgeous as you."
maru: mysteries!!!
specifically murder mysteries or whodunit's. while she does love scientific documentaries as well, she also enjoys a good mystery movie. and when she watches them, she gets INVESTED. im talking making her own predictions and even asking you who you think the killer is. of course, she's always right. maybe she has some sort of "detective intuition"? you think it's adorable how she clings to your arm and rambles about her guesses. "how could you think it was THAT person? it's obviously this one!" can and will provide evidence on how she's right. makes you think and really dive deep into the movies. it's fun to watch them with her because it lets you view things in a different light than normal.
abigail: i think abby loves comedies.
yeah, everyone thinks she would like horror movies - and she does - but her favorite? comedies all the way. she loves a good laugh. the two of you have a movie theater date, making sure to get the extra large popcorn to share (but you wouldn't be mad if abby ate it all, since she usually does. but she looks cute with her face full of popcorn.) she laughs super loud and everyone else in the theater is .. glaring at you two. i think she would also have "full body" laugh reactions like she would smack the seat, smack her legs, just anything. she's having a good time tho. by the end of the date she is completely covered in popcorn (yes, it even managed to get in her hair, somehow) and you spend a few minutes picking each piece out.
haley: honestly? i think she enjoys horror movies. not because she's overly interested in the horror aspect, but because it gets her closer to you.
she would invite you over for a movie. of course, she would probably be scared out of her mind (or not, depending on the severity of the movie). regardless of if she was actually scared or not, i think she'd still find a reason to cuddle up next to you "for comfort" or "because she was scared". you don't mind, though, and you're happy to have her feel safe in your arms. eventually, she'd just stop trying to watch the movie all together and just cuddle up next to you.
penny: i think she would like dramas or melodramas.
penny, being calm and quiet herself, probably likes these genres of movies because she doesn't express very strong emotions herself. not that she doesn't feel them, she does!, she's just very soft spoken and doesn't like to speak her mind for fear of upsetting someone. when she watches these movies, she can relate to the characters and their experiences. it makes her feel.. calmer? in a way. i think she is the type to watch movies while in pajamas, probably before bed or at a sleep over type setting. she will defend her movie choices (not that you'd insult them, anyway). i also think she would be the type to bring "easy" snacks - peanuts and saltine crackers are her best friends. penny seems like the type to have a movie on in the background while doing something else (cleaning, trying new recipes, etc). if you two had a sleepover, she would definitely try to get you interested in her movie choice and list any possible actors you may know. even if it wasn't really "your thing", you'd still watch the movie because it makes penny happy.
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Dancing On My Own (Gambit X Reader, Part One)
Alrighty folks, this was meant to be a quick fluffy one shot that keeps getting longer and more angsty and has been sitting in my drafts for entirely too long now. Still very much a WIP that will be continued this week or next, PG13 for the time being with potential to take a turn for spicy down the line :)
A/N: Some quick background, the reader (Y/N in fic, described with she/her pronouns) is based off of an OC I tend to pull out pretty frequently. Half human, half angel, displaced from their home universe and dropped into this one (in which Lucifer, the tv show, is also cannon because why not maybe do a crossover down the line?). Gambit x Reader is the main ship we're sailing towards, but there's definitely some Logan x Reader if you squint. OH and last last thing, there's a party and I'm shamelessly linking the dress I had in mind for the reader here.
gif credit :) : @counterspelling
Dropping below a read more, don't be shy, come say hi when you're done reading! :)
“‘Stay for the summer!’ they said, ‘quiet and relaxing’ they said!” You throw the words you were told back at Jubilee who looks back at you completely unfazed as you continue untangling string lights to hang in the garden. 
“Honestly Y/N if you had stopped for two seconds to think about who was telling you that, you probably would’ve gone back to LA.” 
She was completely right, of course. You showed up to Xavier’s school not a mutant, not fully human either, and just looking for a place on the east coast to stay. Your uncle Lucifer made a few calls, found a friend willing to host a universe-displaced nephilim, and the rest was history. You might not be a mutant, but you were a partial human with powers you couldn’t always understand, and even other angels in this universe weren’t always able to help. Charles met and understood you quicker than anyone you’ve ever encountered in this universe or the next, so when you were asked to extend your stay and take on some guardian duties over the summer you were happy enough to agree. 
“Jean is the one who told you it would be relaxing, and Jean’s idea of relaxing is staying at a constant level 8 of activity.” 
“How is that not like the school year?” You rolled your eyes, dropping the lights. 
“Well during the school year she bounces between a 9 and 10, reserving 7s and 8s for the weekend. I can make you a diagram or something if you need it.” 
“I’m going to need a lot more than that by the time we’re done here.” 
“Maybe Gambit can help you with that?” Remy had sauntered over from the basketball court, at least that’s what you assumed given his current state of undress. 
“Unless you’re here to help decorate, I don’t think so handsome. If Jean catches us behind schedule the phoenix might make a reappearance…” You looked around and took a deep breath, realizing that other than the lights, everything looked pretty set. There was a reasonable sized clearing in the garden and Jean had hired a company to install a temporary dance floor. Chairs and tables were scattered around picnic style, and Jubilee had done an amazing job of setting up the bar despite being the only one unable to drink, legally.
“I think it’s actually just the lights,” Jubilee nodded to the messy pile at your feet, “And I think Gambit would be more help with that than me anyway, so?” 
“Go ahead,” you nodded smiling and she ran over to hug you, “And if you go to the mall, bring me back a pretzel!!!” You yelled after her knowing it was useless, she’d bring you a pretzel whether she heard you or not. 
“Avoiding me, chere?” Gambit eyed you with his usual flirtatious undertone that you couldn’t make heads or tails of. 
“In fact, I am. Grab that end?” You handed him the lights as he waited for an explanation, “Okay, I’m going to sit in the tree, I just need you to feed me the lights as we move. Ready?” You didn’t give him a chance to answer, disappearing and reappearing in the branch just above his head. 
Gambit stared back troubled and suspicious, so you nodded and gave him the sarcastic, albeit not entirely untrue, answer he was waiting for, “Oh Remy my attraction to you is just so strong and all consuming that I had to avoid you in order to get anything done at all. Every second I can’t throw myself at you is torture. Et cetera, et cetera, please start passing me the lights so I can go inside and shower.” 
He laughed and finally did as you said, “You know if you wanted ol’Gambit all you had to do was ask.” 
The two of you worked in a comfortable silence passing the lights through the trees. Just as you finished wrapping the last string, your footing slipped and you let out a quick yelp before bracing yourself for a fall that never came. 
“I never would have guessed angels could be so clumsy.” 
“If we weren’t you’d be short of a pickup line. Tell me honestly, how many times have you asked a lady if she fell from heaven?” Remy laughed and began walking away with you still in his arms. 
“Not as many as you think, chere. Are we about done out here?” 
You looked around and nodded, “Finally, yes. It was a good catch by the way, but I think I can walk on my own.” 
Placing you back on the ground, the two of you walked towards the mansion in another comfortable silence. Remy was probably tied with Jubilee as your closest friend in the school. You could remember the first day you arrived, how he couldn’t stop watching you. It wasn’t until later that same night, you were out in the garden and could still sense him watching you, that you decided to do something about it. You walked right up to him, introduced yourself, and asked him to kindly explain why he was staring at you like he’s seeing a ghost. 
It turned out the boy who grew up being told he was a demon had a lot of mixed feelings discovering angels and demons were not only real, but one of them was living under his roof. Remy felt a bit silly admitting it to you, but he owed you an honest answer when you confronted him so directly. And when he told you what people had said about him, what he suspected his own parents must have thought of him, your heart broke. You told him stories of all the demons and monsters you’ve encountered, and reassured him that he didn’t come close to fitting the bill.
“What’s on your mind, Remy?” There was quiet and then there was Quiet. You were still pretty new, but you knew well enough when something was bothering him.   
“Are you heading back?” You stopped short, and he stopped to face you. 
“Back where, Rem?” 
“Anywhere that’s not here.” He was facing you but he wouldn’t quite look at you, as if he didn’t actually want to hear the answer.
You took a deep breath, “The honest answer is that I don’t know. I don’t really feel like LA is where I belong, but I’m not a mutant or a gifted youngster either. I mean, I’m not even from this u-” 
“Okay, okay.” Gambit interrupted you with a hug, correctly sensing an impending panic attack from you, “Gambit just worried he won’t get to see you s’all.” 
You took a deep breath, sighing into the hug, “Well that’s really stupid.”  He pulled back to look at you, full of confusion. “It’s really stupid because if I were going anywhere you’d be the first person I tell, and because it takes me about 5 seconds flat to get anywhere. I’d be back before you even knew I was gone.”
You smiled wistfully and he returned it, “I’d know.” 
The two of you continued heading in and you finally felt brave enough to ask the question you’ve really been wanting to ask. 
“Well, I have to head up and start getting ready for tonight. What about you, getting ready for your date?” Of course, you weren’t sure he actually had one, but that was as direct as you could bring yourself to be. 
“Suppose I should be doing the same. Save Gambit a dance?” He kissed your hand and walked away, leaving you flustered and confused. You immediately pulled out your phone.
Y/N: okay so i said ‘gotta go get ready! what about you, getting ready for your date?’ and he said ‘suppose i should do the same’ what do we do with that??
JB: does he think you have a date?? 
Y/N: SHOULD i have a date??? 
JB: yeah, one of you should have asked the other out by now 
You dropped your phone on your bed, having finally made it to your room after a flurry of texts. Complicated feelings for your maybe best friend aside, it was still important to you to be slightly better than presentable tonight. 
Tonight was the first time all summer the adults of the mansion could relax and have a good time, and some non-residential mutants would also be joining the mix. You had never really been to anything so strictly social with the gang, and you didn’t take your invitation lightly. 
It wasn’t exactly formal, but Jubilee was able to confirm your suspicion that it wasn’t exactly casual either. You showered, taking more time than usual to exfoliate and moisturize, trying to pamper yourself into relaxing and getting excited for the night ahead, trying to ignore Remy’s words from earlier bouncing around your head. 
Two simple words that have had you in a tailspin since he said them so casually. ‘I’d know.’
The trouble maker in you wanted to test him on it, and you did a quick assessment of yourself to see if you could. Fresh out of the shower but mostly dressed, you were presentable. Should you take a quick trip overseas, hop over to France for some wine for tonight and back in a blink? You closed your eyes and heard a knock on your door just as you were about to take off. 
You opened your door more suspicious than you’d care to admit, suddenly paranoid that Gambit sniffed you out, but you were met with Jubilee instead, weighed down with garment and shopping bags from the mall. 
“You never answered me! I have your pretzel and you promised we’d do makeup together so-“ it was all the preamble she gave before forcing the pretzel on you and making herself at home in your room. 
“I was showering! And I really thought you were going to be gone longer?” 
“I just had to pick up some stuff I ordered for tonight, plus giving you and Gambit some time to flirt didn’t seem like a bad thing.” 
You rolled your eyes, “We have banter, definitely, but I’m not sure I’d call it flirting. He flirts with everyone.” 
“So you realize that what he does with you is different?” She turns it on you but you’ve heard it before. 
“Yes, different as in he’s not interested!” 
Jubilee made a sound of frustration before giving up and asking for help with contour. You dropped the subject and fell back into your usual routine, an easy friendship that reminded you more of sisters than friends. You showed up at the mansion looking for a place to stay while you visited old haunts, and you made a friend in Jubilee who was willing to venture into those places with you, even if it meant confronting ghosts.
“Lucky for you I think I found the perfect way to test his level of interest. You didn’t pick out what you’re wearing yet, did you?” 
“Well yeah, I was just going to wear-” You started motioning to the dress you picked for tonight, but Jubilee was moving and cutting you off before you even finished.
“Okay so scrap that, I grabbed something for you at the mall,” she reached for one of the garment bags she had laid across your bed, “and if this doesn’t get a reaction out of him, I’m at a loss. What do you think?”
She unzipped the bag and your eyebrows flew up so fast you wondered if they were still there. It was hot pink, sequined, and most noticeably, short and backless. You reached out to touch it and couldn’t deny how beautiful it was. Sure, the pink was a lot and it showed more skin than you were strictly comfortable with, but you couldn’t deny that the striped details of the sequins were gorgeous, or that the dress would hug and accentuate your curves…dangerously. 
“Now tell me what’s really going on because there’s no way you were able to afford this dress.” 
Jubilee snorted, “You got me, it comes with a letter.” She handed you a small envelope you promptly opened and started reading. 
‘Your young friend told me you planned to attend a party wearing some frumpy thing off a rack and that’s simply unacceptable for my niece, I have a reputation to uphold, Y/N ;) Don’t do anything I wouldn’t do! Sincerely, your Fairy DevilFather (p.s. TRY to have fun?)’
“Lucifer intervened to send me a dress?? How did you two even contact each other?” 
“I answered your phone once when he called while you were showering. We really hit it off, he actually sent me one too!” She excitedly pulled out another bag and showed you an equally gorgeous, albeit much more modest dress. Part of you wanted to argue, but another part of you realized how exciting this was for your friend and you weren’t about to let her down when she was waiting for you to join her excitement. 
“I think we might be best dressed tonight?” You smirked and she whooped, celebrating her victory. 
“Oh I’m ready, maybe everyone will finally accept the fact that I’m 20 and stop treating me like I’m still 15.” 
You knew it was a sore point for her, but you still smiled. The way all of the x-men treated Jubilee as their adopted child was something that endlessly warmed your heart, even if it frustrated your friend. The two of you took your time helping each other get your hair and makeup perfect before donning your dresses and leaving your bedroom, having already started to hear the arrival of a few guests and the slight murmur of conversation. 
You stopped just short of the stairs, turning to face Jubilee, “Don’t they say ‘fashionably late’ is a good thing?” Your anxiety was starting to get the best of you, wearing such a risque dress to attend a party with lots of new faces. 
“I think we’ve already reached fashionably late, babe, if we wait any longer they’ll think something is wrong.” You took a deep breath and started to make your way down the stairs. The mansion was empty, signalling that everyone else had already made their way out to the garden. 
The sun was just beginning to set when the two of you arrived to find the party already in full swing. Jean and Scott were dancing, Logan and Hank sharing a drink by the bar, and around 20 faces you had never seen interspersed with the rest of the team. You heard a low wolf whistle behind you and felt a hand on your lower back. 
“Breaking hearts tonight, chere?” Remy was on you before you could even turn to look at the sound. 
“If I’m lucky.” You shrugged. 
“Think I have enough of that for the both of us.” He winked and you tried and failed to suppress a snort that only made him grin wider. 
You turned to say something to Jubilee and your eyes narrowed when you realized the little traitor had run over to greet her friends, leaving you and Gambit alone. She looked your way and winked as you openly glared at her. 
“Well it looks like I’ve been ditched so I’ll need to borrow some of it.” You grimaced in the direction of the crowd, not needing to elaborate.  
“All yours, chere.” He offered you his arm and you accepted, making your way into the party and jumping right into a flurry of introductions, hugs and handshakes that Remy led you through, guiding you away when it was time to move on. 
It seemed innocent enough but you couldn’t stop focusing on the fact that Remy’s hands never left you. Whether it was an arm wrapped protectively around your waist or his hand on your exposed lower back, lazily tracing shapes you couldn’t make out, it was becoming increasingly distracting. He introduced you to Kurt and you only caught 30% of the conversation, too distracted by Remy’s hand tracing the curve of the dip at the back of your dress. You were relieved when Remy excused the two of you to go grab a drink.
“Admit it, not as bad as you thought.” Gambit smirked at you, leading you to a table where Logan and Jubilee were catching up. 
You rolled your eyes, “I never thought it would be bad, I just,” You took a deep breath, “I don’t know, I guess I was worried I wouldn’t fit in here, or that everyone would be wondering why I’m even here but too polite to say anything.” 
Logan and Jubilee both looked in your direction, hearing the tail end of your conversation that you didn’t bother hiding from them. Logan very openly looked you up and down before chuckling and taking a sip of what you suspected to be whiskey. 
“No one’s kicking you out of here looking like that, that’s for sure.” It was maybe the first time the wolverine had ever given you a compliment and you blushed. 
“You clean up rather nicely yourself, Logan.” 
“Then why are you spending all night with the cajun instead of talking to me?” You were surprised but did your best to cover it up, meanwhile Jubilee was fighting off a laugh herself by taking a sip of her drink.
“Because the cajun knows how a lady should be treated.” Gambit grumbled, leveling Logan with a look before departing briefly to get the both of you drinks.  
“Does he?” Logan asked you while you sat to join them, shooting him a quizzical look before he continued, “Know how to treat a lady?” 
“How much have you had, Logan?” You asked, eyeing his drink. 
“Not that much, darlin’. Answer the question.” If there was one thing you loved about Logan it was his lack of bullshit, and judging by the look on Jubilee’s face as she waited for your answer, right now it was probably her favorite thing about him too, 
“He’s been a perfect gentleman, but we’re just friends.” You tried to say it in a way that wouldn’t reveal how much that bothered you, but both of them knew better. Gambit returned a second later with your drinks and you only got two sips in before Logan insisted on a round of shots. 
One round turned into two, turned into three, turned into…you lost count. Jubilee was swaying happily in her seat, having convinced the two men to let her join in with half shots somewhere around round three. Everyone’s judgement was impaired by that point, but she made a great argument about drinking for the first at home where she’s safe or something else you couldn’t remember anymore in your happily inebriated state.
A song came on and you gasped, turning towards the dancefloor and excitedly announcing your love for the song. What it was called? You couldn’t remember if your life depended on it, but you needed to dance. You locked eyes with Remy who smiled but shifted his eyes away awkwardly, causing you to quickly deflate. 
“Have you even had a dance yet tonight, Y/N?” Logan asked you suspiciously. 
“Not yet.” You pouted, considering heading out on your own, dance partner be damned. 
“Knows how to treat a lady my ass.” Logan grumbled in Gambit’s direction, shooting a glare at him before getting up and begrudgingly but kindly offering you his hand. 
“Oh. my. GOD.” Jubilee squealed, far too gone to contain her excitement at the drama, as she would say.  
You beamed at Logan, accepting his hand and making a run for the dance floor, pulling him along behind you. 
“That crazy cajun might try to take my head off later for this.” Logan grumbled, settling his arms at your waist while you threw yours around his neck, getting closer than was strictly necessary so the two of you could continue your talk while dancing. Your eyes shifted over to where you just left your friends and you felt a stabbing pain in your chest when you looked for Remy just to see he had also made his way over to the dance floor, with Rogue. 
“I don’t think you have anything to worry about, Logan.” Your eyes were starting to tear up and you looked up trying to stop it as Logan became worried, turning to figure out what made you so upset. His eyes landed on Gambit and he growled, holding you a little closer as he actively tried to calm down. 
“I’ll kill him.” 
“You won’t.” You laughed, “He’s allowed to be with whoever he wants.”
“Yeah, but he’s not allowed to follow you around all night like a lovesick puppy just to ditch you when he catches another scent.” 
You smiled sadly, “He was being a good friend earlier, that’s it.” 
Logan pulled you closer and leaned down to whisper in your ear, “I watched his hands stray all over you, Y/N,” He touched your bare back to emphasize his point, “He’s not a friend, he’s a coward.” You couldn’t take it anymore and hugged Logan, hiding your face in his chest to let a few tears escape, hoping you would feel a bit better if you could get some of your distress out. 
“Might have to kill em for making you cry.” Logan grumbled and you laughed, smiling up at him despite yourself. 
“Believe it or not you’re helping enough like this.” The two of you continued dancing and Logan’s discomfort wasn’t wasted on you, but he’d be damned if he let the two of you leave that dance floor before Gambit and Rogue. He was making a point. 
The music began to slow down and Rogue and Gambit finally went their separate ways. You watched as Remy found Jubilee again and made their way back over to the table, you turned to Logan.
“Think we should head back?” He looked behind you and shook his head.
“We finally get a song that’s more my speed and you want to leave?” He shook his head no and pulled you closer, making you laugh and rest your head on his chest as the two of you swayed lazily. 
“Thank you, Logan. It’s not how I expected the night to go but I wouldn’t have gotten through it without you.” 
“Dancing with you looking like that isn’t exactly a punishment.” He snarked and you chuckled.
“Mind if I cut in?” You looked up to meet red eyes, Remy looking between you and Logan harshly before addressing you again more quietly, “Didn’t Gambit ask you to save him a dance?” 
You hesitated and Logan took that as his cue, “Bad timing cajun, Y/N just said she was getting dizzy, we’re heading back to the table.” Logan put his arm around you and lead you out of there, leaving Gambit to grumble and trail the two of you back. 
Jean had joined Jubilee to rest and eyed the three of you quizzically as you made your return.
“Y/N!! I found out that shots of vodka with cranberry juice is amazing, look!” She held out a shot for you and you grabbed it and threw it back before Logan and Remy could even finish their protests.
“Chere! Didn’t you say you were dizzy?” Gambit took the shot glass out of your hand, leading you to a chair. 
“From the dancing, Rem! I definitely haven’t had enough to drink yet.” 
Jubilee whooped and passed you another shot, clinking it to her own before you both threw them back. Jean looked at you even more confused and you tapped your temple with a wink, an agreed upon gesture inviting her to read your mind. 
“Rough night but I promise everything is okay, just need to drown my sorrows a little with you guys. Logan’s been doing his best.” 
You heard Jean’s response in your head, “Fair enough. I’ve been cutting Jubilee’s shots with a lot of cranberry juice. Seriously, a LOT.” 
You struggled to mask your laugh, “As I was saying, definitely not enough to drink, I’m gonna go-“ You stood and made your way to the bar on your own before anyone else could say anything, but you could feel a few sets of eyes watching you leave. 
Someone had been manning the bar, but as the night wore on and the guests dwindled, those of you remaining were left to fend for yourself. You assessed your options and reached for the gin, giving that a generous pour before adding sprite, a splash of cranberry juice, and a lime wedge before you can talk yourself out of it. 
“That looks amazing, can you make me one too?” Jubilee had appeared at your side and you smiled before making her a much more restrained version of yours. “Now I need you to tell me eeeeevery detail of you and Wolvie dancing I mean I neeeever-“ 
“To be clear,” you interrupted, sipping at your drink, “It was a pity save when it became painfully obvious Remy wasn’t going to ask.” 
“After spending literally all night following you around and basically growling at anyone that tried to get near you, what’s up with that??” She made a good point but you weren’t sure what she meant by that first part. 
“Pause, rewind, what are you talking about ‘basically growling’?” 
“You seriously didn’t realize how handsy he got with you when Kurt started getting friendly?” 
You realized you were drunk when you couldn’t stop the words from coming out of your mouth, “I was so distracted by him being handsy I didn’t even hear whatever Kurt was saying to make the connection.” 
Jubilee nearly spat her drink in your face and she started smacking you excitedly, “Can you please please go tell him that??” 
“But then he didn’t ask me to dance!! He pointedly looked away!!” 
“So Logan? What happened there?” You were starting to suspect your friend wasn’t nearly as inebriated as you thought, her tone sounding surprisingly sharp shifting gears. 
“I really don’t think there’s anything more than his mother-hen instincts going on there.” 
Her eyes rolled and she shrugged, “I’d agree if it was just one dance, but-“ 
“Again, pretty sure that was to save me from being zeroed in on Gambit’s dance with Rogue..” 
She didn’t have a response for that one and she simply clinked your drink before you both took generous sips, “Don’t tell Jean.” You whispered as you topped both of your glasses off before heading back to the group.
Jean had left to track down Scott who was mingling in the small groups that remained, some still dancing but most everyone else was doing the same as your small group. Jubilee bounced into the seat next to Logan and you drifted a beat too long before sitting next to Gambit. The silence that stretched between the two of you was no longer as comfortable as it was earlier, so you broke and piped up first. 
“I almost tested you earlier, you know.” 
“Almost?” Remy squinted at you, “Been testing me all night, chere.” 
You narrowed your eyes back but decided not to engage, continuing your thought instead, “When you said you’d know if I left?” His playful glare dropped and he waited on your next words, “Just a quick trip before the party but still, decided against it.” 
Remy chewed on what you were saying and not saying, wondering how the night had gotten so far away from him. Everything started out better than he expected, getting to show you around the party, not letting you too far out of sight in that dress, and then the hesitation. His own doubt sneaking in, reminding him that Y/N is quite literally an angel, he knew her place in the world, but his? He looked over at you waiting for a response and decided that didn’t matter right now.
“Still have sea legs or are you about ready for that dance, chere?” He didn’t leave you much room to answer, already standing with his arm extended. 
“You know I literally just sat back down, right?” He rolled his eyes at you, grabbing your hand and pulling you to your feet alongside him. Your night was clearly nowhere near over and you gave in, letting Remy lead you back onto the dance floor and into his arms. 
225 notes · View notes
thebiggerbear · 3 months
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i won't let you go
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Summary: When Jen breaks CJ's heart, though you hadn't planned on it, her loss quickly becomes your gain and so much more.
Pairing: CJ Braxton x Female!Reader
A/N: Did a free writing session recently and this happened. Not sure why but anytime I get to spend with this cute boy, I'm taking it. The Lovelines episode always bothered me. I completely understood why Jen did what she did but that whole episode was just brutal and then her apology/explanation in the end was very Jen, yes, but also kind of dismissive imho on just how heartbreaking it was and how horrifically she had treated him in that auditorium to try to avoid having to explain. I get it, CJ wasn't a main character, Jen was, but damn. So I guess this is kind of my response to that.
All unbeta'd.
Songs listened to while writing: More Than Words - Extreme; Style - Taylor Swift
Warnings: angst; implied sex; smut-lite; a smidgen of fluff
Word Count: 4300
Taglist: @avada-kedavra-bitch-187; @rieleatiel
CJ Braxton Taglist: @deans-spinster-witch; @birdiellie; @heartlessdelusions; @illicithallways; @nancymcl; @muhahaha303; @solacedthistest; @deansimpala; @foxyjwls007; @onlyangel-444
Jensen Taglist: @samanddeaninatrenchcoat; @deansbbyx
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When Jen publicly rebuffed him again, CJ’s jaw dropped and his eyes caught yours. You didn’t know what to do, what to think. And you could see he was feeling the same along with some humiliation and hurt. He quickly glanced away and moved off to the side, waiting to bring the mic to someone who might interrupt whatever this circus was with a question. Your heart went out to him. 
Why was Jen doing this? First, she had dropped him unceremoniously earlier, without any semblance of a warning or even an explanation. Then he had tried to talk to her before the show and she had avoided him, still not giving any sort of reason for why she called things off so suddenly. This couldn’t possibly be stress alone from hosting this event. If that was the case, how would she handle finals this year? Or when she and CJ argued? Or any other stressful event that might occur in her life?
CJ was at a loss and now he had tried to publicly corner her (possibly not the best strategy to be fair but you knew he was desperate) and she had brutally shut him down. It was humiliating, tough to watch, and beyond dismissive. So yeah, your heart broke for him.
The truth was, you had feelings for your friend and had for some time now. But when the two of you met at one of the frat parties on campus in the beginning of the year, CJ made it very clear to you and anyone who would listen, that he was not dating nor was he interested in hooking up with anyone. That had disappointed you more than you would ever be willing to admit, but you respected the very personal decision, one he had made before he ever met you. 
Then Jen appeared out of nowhere and he still hadn’t been interested despite the obvious liking she had taken to him. You couldn’t blame her since you were stuck in your own unrequited crush. Then her friend, Audrey, had happened and suddenly, CJ was ready to date again. He liked the chaotic blonde and wanted to pursue things, only to find out she had a boyfriend she didn’t tell him about and oh, by the way, she wasn’t interested in knowing anything more about him than she already did. Humbled from the experience as well as the fight he got into with said boyfriend, CJ stayed to himself and kept his head down afterwards. Then he started training Jen at The Stand and before anyone knew it, they were a couple. Something you found out from him the day after he had kissed her. It was like a sucker punch to the gut. His night with Audrey and his feelings after it had hurt enough. Now he was dating Jen Lindley? The girl he had turned down the first time he tried to kiss her the same night he hooked up with Audrey? It broke your heart, but you put a smile on your face and told him how happy you were for him. You were a supportive friend, right? So you did what you had to do, noticing the happy grin on his face in response to your congratulations, right before you made your excuses and left. 
And now, here you were, watching as he got his heart broken by the very girl that had somehow gotten him to consider serious dating (and drinking though you didn’t think that was a great idea) again. No, she wasn’t just breaking it; she was full on stomping on it, ripping it into pieces, and setting fire to it — all in front of a voracious audience. You were pretty sure the Colosseum in Rome had stopped being used over a thousand years ago, but people were still the same animal. The devastation you could see playing out in CJ’s expression when he looked over at you more than confirmed just how torn up he was inside, how embarrassed and hurt he really was. 
You saw him watching the scene on stage with rapt attention but then you panicked when you noticed him suddenly lifting the mic and getting ready to speak again once he was able to get a word in edgewise. Your body reacted before your mind could even make the decision. You jumped to your feet, quickly excused your way out of the row you were in, and hurried over to him. You pushed his arm down before he could utter a single word. He turned wide eyes on you and you shook your head, taking the mic from him and shutting it off. Thankfully, the crowd and everyone on stage were more invested in Joey and Eddie’s unfolding drama. “CJ, please don’t,” you begged.
“She’s got to tell me why.”
“I know.” You laid a reassuring hand on his upper arm. “But not right now. Later, when you two can talk privately.”
“But she won’t talk to me.”
“She will,” you assured him, though you had no way of knowing if that was true. “Just give her some time. And preferably not have that conversation in front of half the school,” you attempted to joke to take the sting out of the situation and soften your advice.
CJ glanced around before his eyes came to a stop on the stage again and he noticed Jen wasn’t even looking in his direction. His face fell and you moved your hand to his, taking it.
“Let’s get out of here,” you impulsively suggested. Anything to get that look of pain off of his face.
“I can’t. I’m supposed to stay until it’s over.”
You scanned the vicinity and found a young girl, possibly a freshman, standing a few feet away, watching the drama with everyone else. You tightened your grip on CJ’s hand and marched over to her. “Hey, do you think you could take over?” You asked. “It’s real simple. Anyone raises their hand, you just bring over the mic so they can ask their question.” 
“Uh, s-sure.” She actually seemed unsure but you didn’t care; your priority was your friend. You turned the mic back on and handed it to her before turning and getting CJ out of there, making sure he didn’t look back. 
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You checked your reflection in the mirror one last time before giving yourself a nod of approval and exiting the bathroom. You found CJ still in bed, sitting up against the headboard and channel surfing. His eyes suddenly snapped to you and a slow smile spread across his face. He gave you an appreciative whistle which made you roll your eyes as you pulled back the covers and got into bed next to him. “Stop that,” you playfully chided.
He immediately turned the TV off and tossed the remote somewhere, making you laugh. He dug his teeth into his bottom lip as he lifted the blanket and sheets to move closer to you and his gaze roamed over the silk negligee you were wearing. “You didn’t have to get all dressed up for me but wow, you are beautiful.”
“Uh huh,” you teased. “I know you just want to take this off as soon as possible.”
“True,” he admitted, kissing your bare shoulder. “But I also want to take my time taking it off.” He then placed a kiss on your jawline. 
“Well, you’ve got all weekend. Though we should probably include sustenance and a shower or two in there somewhere.” He snickered as he kissed your cheek. You really did have all weekend. You had booked the room for the next two days, not having to check out until Monday morning when you would need to make the drive back up to Boston. 
After the whole Loveline fundraiser fiasco, you had taken CJ to get some much needed coffee and let him vent out his frustration and his hurt over the pain Jen was causing him. 
“It just doesn’t make any sense. We were fine up until today. I don’t get what I did wrong.”
You had covered his hand with yours and brushed your thumb over his skin in reassuring strokes. “I’m sure you didn’t do anything wrong.”
“I was completely up front with her. About everything.” He licked his lips, lost in thought, before shame washed over his expression. “Maybe she’s still mad about the Audrey thing. Though I feel like she would have said something by now if that were the case. She seemed like she got past it. Or maybe it’s my past that’s the problem. I did tell her I bought some champagne for later tonight. Maybe she heard that and thought she was better off...” He gave a half-hearted shrug and stared down into his coffee. “This is exactly why I don’t do the dating thing,” he mumbled, his expression now even more troubled as he tiredly rubbed at his forehead. You knew he must be thinking back to the catalyst of him making that choice alongside the decision to immediately quit drinking.
“I’m sure it has nothing to do with that or your past,” you murmured. “Like you said, she already knew about everything before you two started dating. I’m sure it’s not that.”
His eyes met yours then. “How do you know? You barely know her, Y/N. How would you know what she’s thinking? I don’t even know what she’s thinking and she’s my girlfriend. Or was until this afternoon, anyway.”
You winced and glanced away, choosing to focus on the group of friends laughing loudly in the corner of the coffee shop you were seated in. You slowly pulled your hand away, grateful and disappointed at the same time that he didn’t seem to really care or notice. You wanted to be a good friend to him, you really did, but that hurt a little. You knew he was hurting as well and he wasn’t really mad at you. But you needed a second to gain your bearings. It wasn’t easy hearing the guy you had feelings for pine over someone else, someone who seemed intent on tossing him to the side for some odd reason and pushing him away.
“I’m sorry, Y/N. I didn’t mean that. I’m just…”
You turned to find him dropping his head into his arms on the table. He bumped his head against them a few times before sitting back up. “I just don’t understand why this happened. I thought what she and I had was good, solid. That we had gotten to a really good point. Guess I was wrong.”
You pressed your lips together, hating yourself for what you were about to do but knowing it was the right thing. “If this were me or someone calling into The Stand right now, what would you tell them?”
He glanced over at you, his brows furrowing as he thought it over. “To talk to them, find out what was really going on.” You gave him a look. “But I tried that. Twice.”
You tightened your grip on your coffee mug. “Once in a very public setting. Once before a big event that she was stressing about hosting. And didn’t you tell me that this is her first sort of real relationship in a long time or something like that?” You could see the realization dawning on his cute face while you worked to keep the sadness off of yours. “So maybe something happened, something that you have no idea about or something that doesn’t have anything to do with you. You said it yourself, you two were doing well, becoming solid. She wanted the same thing you wanted. Feelings don’t just change overnight.” You dropped your gaze to your coffee. “Trust me,” you finished quietly, hoping you managed to keep the bitterness from your tone. 
“Y/N.”
You looked up to find him watching you intently, concerned. Here he was, spiraling due to what happened to him and going through his own pain, but now he had immediately switched gears and was studying you with complete empathy for whatever you might be going through. It was just one of the many things you loved about him. Loved. That word had your eyes widening and you immediately straightened up and got to your feet. 
CJ’s brows furrowed, his concern increasing. “You okay?”
“Yeah. Yeah, of course. I just remembered I have this thing I need to… Yeah.” You slipped your jacket on and didn’t meet his eyes. “Look, talk to Jen. Not tonight, though. Sleep on it and then try again tomorrow. She might be more receptive to talking then. Okay?” You slipped two buttons into their corresponding holes and left the rest, anxious to get out of there. “I’ll be back at my dorm later. Call if you need anything.”
“Y/N, hold up a second. I just want to make sure you’re—”
“Gotta run,” you cut him off, stopping to kiss the top of his head…something you had never done before and you weren’t even sure why you were doing it now. Oh God, you had to get out of there. “Um, bye,” you called and hurried out of the shop. 
You didn’t make it far though before you were whipped around, coming face to face with a very confused yet pensive looking CJ. His eyes roamed over your face and he seemed to be considering something. You were about to ask him what he needed when realization suddenly dawned on his features followed by something that appeared to be determination. He gently cupped your cheeks and leaned in, brushing his lips against yours. 
You felt the kiss everywhere, like a shock of electricity that traveled through your body to light up every single inch of you from the top of your head to your fingertips and then right down to your toes. You were surprised you hadn’t collapsed to the ground; your knees literally felt weak. The flip feeling in your stomach that you usually got when he was near, when he laid an arm across your shoulders when you two would talk and laugh over whatever horror movie he had you watching next, it was back in full force. Your heart skipped a beat and giddiness had your lips forming into the beginning of a smile against his. You never wanted this to end.
But it did. CJ broke away and pulled back, staring into your eyes.
“Whoa,” you breathed, not even really meaning to say anything. You weren’t even sure how you were forming words at this point. Because if you had been able to think right then, that certainly wouldn’t have been your first choice of things to say in reaction to what just happened.
“Yeah,” he whispered, sounding just as awestruck as you did.  
“What do we do?” Why was your brain not cooperating and stopping any words that wanted to tumble out?
He grasped your chin between his thumb and forefinger, his eyes flicking back and forth between your mouth and you, before he leaned in again.
This time, you placed a hand on his chest, effectively stopping his progress. “I’m not going to be a rebound or something to pass the time with. You’re not going to use me to make Jen jealous or to make yourself feel better until you get over her.” It was official; your brain and mouth were in cahoots to betray you and completely embarrass you while they were at it. He had only kissed you once for crying out loud.
CJ nodded, staring into your eyes and his lips ghosting over yours, still frozen in the place you had stopped him. “Got it,” he murmured.
Your brain switched off then and you threaded your fingers in his hair before you lifted up on your toes and bridged the gap, kissing him as deeply as you dared. His arms encircled your waist and pulled you closer against his body, causing you to let out a tiny squeak against his mouth. A chuckle rumbled in his chest before he slotted his lips against yours more insistently, one of his hands also sneaking up into your hair and coming to rest behind your neck as he gently pushed you to meet him more fervently. 
You? You had died and gone to heaven. CJ, your longtime crush, the friend you had feelings for, was kissing you and that was all you needed to know right then. Everything else fell away and ceased to matter in the face of that fact. 
You had stayed true to your word; you didn’t allow yourself to become a rebound despite what followed that night. CJ had eventually talked to Jen and found out why she had broken up with him in the manner she had. Her grandmother had cancer, something she had found out the previous night, and she had a “freakout”. That was what CJ had called it when he told you. Jen had felt overwhelmed and scared and unable to handle anything that wasn’t related to her Grams. So she’d purposely pushed CJ away, something she now deeply regretted and apologized for. He more than understood why she did what she did and truthfully, so did you. 
You had bitten your lip to keep the tears at bay that you could feel trying to form. While you felt compassion for Jen and her grandmother, not even being able to imagine what they must be going through, you could feel your heart breaking even further in your chest. That night had been rough for him but it turned out to be an absolute magical one for you in the end. You should have known it would be short-lived. You knew he still had feelings for Jen, cared about her, they had dated for months — that wasn’t something that just switched off because of whatever had popped up between the two of you in the last few days.
CJ had covered your hand with his and squeezed, urging you to meet his eyes. When you did, he reached over and tenderly placed a strand of wayward hair behind your ear, giving you some semblance of a reassuring smile. “I told her I’d be there for her, whatever she needed. As a friend.”
Your brows furrowed in confusion. “But I thought…”
“You thought wrong,” he teased in a murmur before kissing you.
CJ had taken what you’d said to him seriously and though you two didn’t seem able to keep your hands off of each other, he let some time pass before he officially asked you out on a date. 
“Aren’t we doing this a little backwards?” You’d laughed, gasping into his mouth as his hand on the small of your back pushed your hips to meet his more fully. You had met in between classes at his dorm and he’d managed to convince you to be a little late to your next one, though he was completely in favor of you skipping it altogether. 
“Not yet. That’s next,” he panted, giving you a suggestive smirk. You couldn’t help but roll your eyes at his ridiculously bad (yet endearing) joke. He repeated the action from before and your teeth dug into your lip as your grip on his hair tightened. “I really want to do this right.”
“Mmm, you’re more than doing it right,” you moaned, closing your eyes and arching your neck when he pushed you down onto him a third time, making you feel everything.
“Look at me,” he urged you breathlessly. You forced your eyes open, immediately settling on his and seeing the earnestness there. “I want to make this official, if it’s also what you want.” You could see a little worry in his green gaze, a little wariness, as if he was waiting for you to drop the bomb that he wasn’t what you wanted after all. That now would be when you chose to turn and run in the other direction. Silly boy.
“After all of this time, these past few months of us sleeping together and spending time together, you still don’t know?”
You saw the worry grow and you felt him tensing underneath you, almost as if bracing for impact, literally. You silently resolved then that you would do everything you could to take away that whisper of fear and doubt of his own self-worth that you saw still existed, after Jen, after his past. You gave him a reassuring smile and placed your forehead onto his. “I love you, you silly boy,” you whispered.    
You watched as shock played out on his face before his eyes softened slightly and a hint of a shy smile formed on his lips. “Yeah?”
“Yeah,” you confirmed, tenderly kissing his nose. 
His smile grew. “What a strange coincidence because I was just thinking I kind of love you, too.”
You pulled back, arching a brow. “Kind of? Oh, I get it, it’s because we haven’t gotten to the backwards part yet, right? Should’ve known,” you teased. 
“Shut up,” he laughed, reaching up to frame your face with his hands and kissing you. “I do, okay? I love you, too.”
You beamed down at him. “Okay.”
He was the one arching a brow this time. “Okay?”
“Okay, I’ll go out on that date with you.”
“One I love you is all it took to get you to say yes?”
You shrugged. 
“Wow, we really are doing this backwards,” he chuckled. 
“Told you.” You shot him a cocky grin.
“And I believe I told you.” He mirrored your smirk and lifted you off of him, carefully tossing you back onto the bed. You broke into a fit of giggles as you bounced and he chuckled once more as his body covered yours, cutting off your laughter by kissing you deeply. It wasn’t too long after that that he kept his word, on both counts. 
Things were going well and you were both happy to have moved your friendship that had turned into something more into something great. CJ transferring to New York to continue his education had been difficult but it was a plan you had known about long before he ever kissed you that first time. 
While you would miss him and secretly worry that this might be the kiss of death in your relationship (everyone knew long distance relationships didn’t have the best track record), you were determined to support him and meet him halfway in this, sometimes literally. There had been a few romantic weekends spent in Connecticut and of course, he came to Boston to visit when he could and you traveled to Manhattan when you could. You made it work, as much as any couple was able to. It helped that you were on the same coast and within driving distance of each other.
So here you were, on one such visit to the boy you loved with all of your heart. You cupped his cheek and brought him in for a kiss. “Hi,” you whispered.
“Hi,” he murmured against your lips, a dopey smile settling onto his cute face. “I’ve missed you.” 
“Are you sure about that? You haven’t been seeing any girls from New York on the side, have you?” You couldn’t resist teasing him once more.
“No.” He pecked your lips. “They’ve got nothing on Boston girls.” 
“Damn straight,” you muttered as he kissed you again.
“Especially one girl from Boston in particular.”
“And who might that be?” You smiled when he placed a kiss to the corner of your mouth.
“Just some girl.” He gently urged you down onto your back and hovered over you, grinning. “You probably don’t know her.” You playfully swatted at his bare chest and he snickered, lowering down to brush his lips against your jawline. “You’re not dating any guys from Boston, are you?”
You gave it right back to him. “Nope, just one. You probably don’t know him, though. He’s incredibly good looking, smart, funny, very caring and empathetic, a real firecracker in the sack, brave…oh, and did I mention he’s super good looking?” You gave him a half-hearted shrug. “Eh, you probably don’t know him.”
He glared down at you playfully as you laughed and he pulled you closer, yanking you roughly underneath him and eliciting a tiny squeal from you. He lowered himself down, resting on his arms to keep from crushing you with his weight, and your legs automatically parted for him, coming up to cradle his hips. “A real firecracker in the sack, huh?”
“Mmm.” You dug your teeth into your bottom lip, smiling as you looked up at him. “Yeah,” you whispered.
His grin softened slightly and his hands tenderly brushed your hair out of your eyes. “I really have missed you,” he murmured. You could see he had; it was all right there in his gaze, in his expression. This long distance thing wasn’t easy for either of you, by any means, but he was more than worth it. He always had been and you made sure to let him know that in every way possible.
You reached up and affectionately ran your fingers through his hair. “I really missed you, too.”
CJ’s smile overtook his face and he leaned down, pressing his lips to yours. You drank of him deeply as you both began to make up for lost time, this boy who held your heart in the palm of his hand and had it pretty much from the moment you met. The same boy whose own heart had been entrusted to you, warily being handed to you in its cracked and fragile state which you then held together with your fingers until those fractures healed as best they could. You loved him and he loved you; you couldn’t ask for anything more.
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paracosmic-murdock · 3 months
Text
i still got love for you
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part four: i hope for you
pairing: francesca bridgerton x fem!reader
summary: leaving for bath out of the sudden was the hardest thing you had had to do, not particularly because you had left your parents and home behind, but because your friendship with francesca bridgerton was ripped away from you a sudden summer morning.
five years later, francesca arrived in bath for the season to practice pianoforte with her aunt winnie, and finally, you see her again after thinking you had forever lost her. how much you wanted for your love to live and beat still, how much you wanted for francesca to say so.
warnings/tags: sapphic francesca bridgerton, childhood friends to lovers, mutual pining, am i gay quiz but make it nineteenth century somehow, smut, minors dni, inspired by an emily dickinson intimate letter to susan hunington dickinson, song: seven (taylor swift)
word count: 3.7K
❁ part one | part two | part three | part five | part six
❁ mila's anthology (main masterlist)
“Susie, will you indeed come home next Saturday, and be my own again, and kiss me as you used to? I hope for you so much, and feel so eager for you, feel that I cannot wait, feel that now I must have you — that the expectation once more to see your face again makes me feel hot and feverish, and my heart beats so fast.” (Excerpt from Open me carefully: Emily Dickinson's intimate letters to Susan Hunington Dickinson by Emily Dickinson)
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“That is your favorite breakfast.”
You stopped playing with your fork and looked at him. “I am not hungry.”
He ate the last bite of his dish. “Oh, and why would that be? The last time you ate was for lunch yesterday and it was almost nothing.”
“I do not know. Perhaps I am tragically ill.”
“Clearly,” He scoffed sarcastically. “You miss her.”
“I don't miss anybody, Charles. I just feel unwell.” you stated.
“You, Sister, are a terrible liar.”
“And you, Brother, are delusional.”
He shook his head and stood up, putting the napkin you had embroidered on the table before storming off without any explanation.
You rolled your eyes, drinking your berry tea.
As much as you wanted to deny it, you were pensive because you missed Francesca.
You haven't seen her since dinner a couple of weeks ago, and you couldn't help but feel bad about it.
Three days after that evening, you went to her aunt's home but were told she was not there. You left a message for her: she was invited to join you for tea the next day or whenever she wanted to, for you would be at your home every day.
You canceled quite some plans just in case she went, but she never did. And you were devastated.
It was a lovely evening, and you thought everything went really well. Perhaps it was because you had called her darling. You felt it was proper at the moment, but now, not anymore. Now, in your mind, you have made her feel uncomfortable and lost her forever.
Charles’ mind was known for hardly being made up.
Dilemma was almost his second name, and it was no secret. Always a dilemma, and now wasn't the exception.
He hates to see you upset and hurting. You are his sister, and ever since you were born, he vowed to love you and protect you. And after your parents sent you away, it was his biggest purpose.
Right now, he had no choice but to tell Francesca Bridgerton, in front of him, the reason he was there.
Charles cleared his throat. “I suppose you have an idea as to why I am here.”
“Charles…”
“Frannie, did she do something wrong?”
“No, I just…” She sighed. “I have not been feeling very well lately, that is all.”
“Are you sure?” he questioned, not quite believing her.
“Yes.” She nodded.
“My sister has been punishing herself for your absence, and… it breaks me to see her like this,” he mentioned. Francesca felt her heart break at the thought of you hurting. “Why don't you come for lunch at our home? I shall have the cooks do something you like.”
“Uh, we were invited for lunch at the Maguire's home, I am sorry…” she lied.
Charles sighed. “When can we receive you, then?”
“I do not know.” she said, looking down to her hands.
He stood up. “I really hope you know she is hurting because of your absence. She did those five years, and she has these past weeks. She loves you, and I know you love her too. And no, not in a friendly manner.”
And, just like that, he left.
Francesca sighed and watched him leave, not able to decide what to do. To stop him. To ask him. To do anything.
In truth, the reason Francesca has not visited you in weeks is because she was scared of loving you. Not for being you, but for being a woman.
Her aunt Winnie had asked her if Lord Chadwick was courting her, but she didn't quite know what to say. She just said she did not know, but her aunt was convinced he was.
Understandably so, because no man would just invite a young lady to his home so many times if he didn't have any intention to court her. What she didn't know was that the one interested in her was you. Another lady.
After the implications regarding your brother, Francesca's aunt remarked how important it was for her to marry a gentleman, a good man, wealthy, and with title. The only one Francesca wanted was you.
You, you, you… No one else.
It pained her to know that her actions were affecting you, especially because the last thing she ever wanted was to make you feel bad. She loved you, and she knew that when you love somebody, you want that person to be happy.
But you could never feel fine or happy without Francesca. You couldn't deny that. Nor would she, especially now that you have reunited. And now that she knew that you loved her, too.
In all honesty, you calling her darling was unexpected and spooked her more than she was willing to admit. Maybe because it was a term of endearment and no one had used it on her before, or maybe because you used it, confirming she was your darling. Yours. Oh, how much Francesca longed to be yours.
So she thought about you during the lunch at Chadwick House she was invited to attend but wasn't intending to, during the afternoon she would've spent playing pianoforte instead, and during the evening she was supposed to get ready to sleep but didn't. Her aunt went to sleep, and she did quite the opposite, sneaking to the backyard to get you flowers, and leaving her home for the purpose of finding you.
Francesca did not particularly come up with a plan, so when she saw herself in front of the entrance to Chadwick House without a way to get in, she got worried. However, she didn't have to worry for much longer because Charles opened the door some minutes later.
“Charles!” She flinched and hid her hands behind her back as he suddenly appeared in front of her with a confused frown.
“Francesca?” He grinned. “What are you doing here?”
Francesca shook her head. “I- uh… I came to- nothing! I was just- I am going back.”
“Frannie, with all due respect,” Charles sighed, grabbing her forearm to stop her from leaving. “Shut up. My sister is in her chambers. Third floor, second door to the left.”
“Sorry,” She pouted. “I guess-”
“Lord save me! You two are driving me mad!” he exclaimed as he covered his face with his hands. “Get in there, Francesca, and don't you dare leave before resolving whatever it is that you two have going.”
With that, he left her there and got on the awaiting carriage she had failed to notice before.
Francesca sighed, walking inside the house and following your brother's directions until she reached your door.
She knocked, but received no answer, so she opened the door to find your room empty. Francesca guessed that, perhaps, you had gone out for a walk, so she went downstairs and ended up looking at you from afar.
You were sitting in the swing and looking at the night sky in utter silence, and she almost didn't dare to interrupt you. She, however, had a purpose for her visit and wouldn't let the courage she had gathered go to waste.
Francesca sat silently in the swing beside yours without saying a word.
“Charles, I told you to let me be.” you groaned, looking opposite from 'his' face.
She cleared her throat. “This is not Charles.”
You turned around abruptly to face her.
Dear God.
“Francesca-” you whispered, almost not believing it. “Are you truly here?”
“Yes, I am here,” She smiled, showing you the tulip of an unknown color in the dark. “But, firstly, this is for you.”
You smiled weakly.
At the silence, she spoke. “I, uh- I had to see you.”
“What for?”
“To apologize,” she replied and sighed, getting ready for the speech she had prepared the whole afternoon. “For not coming back after dinner. I… I was scared because you called me darling, and it made me realize that I might not be… alone in these feelings I find impossible to name. It felt real out of the sudden, and I was not prepared for it. I thought about them all those days and reached to a conclusion I was dreading: that I love you. Not like a girl who is fond of her childhood best friend or like a girl who has such dear affection for a sister, no; I love you like one loves the person that is to be their spouse, their love match. I know well enough that this is not something a woman is supposed to feel for another woman, but I do, and I have reasons to believe you do as well. Please, tell me I am not alone in this feeling, for I believe that love could never be as profound as mine for you were it not reciprocated.”
You grabbed the rope of her swing and pulled her close to you. “I love you, my darling. I love you so much that I fear the word love is not enough to grasp all that I feel for you. It is pathetic, the way your proximity makes my whole being combust in yearning; it is alluring, the way your eyes can heal all that chaos when they look into mine. Having you here with me, under the full moon and in a field of violets, is the utmost proof of how sacred this love is. How sacred we must treat it. Being yours is the ultimate purpose of my existence, and I would be beyond grateful to you if you allowed me to honor it by loving you devotedly and cherishing you adoringly.”
Francesca exhaled and hesitated for a single, intrusive second. She, right then and there, kissed your lips softly. There was doubt and insecurity, but you managed to wash it out by kissing her back with a passion she couldn't have even dreamt of.
“Would you like to stay for the night? It is far too late for you to return home by yourself and we do not have another carriage available. I fear Charles will not return until tomorrow.” you proposed, standing up and offering her your hand to do so, too.
Francesca nodded, now standing as well, and staring at your lips.
You smirked, closing the distance promptly.
You did not know how to kiss, but the two of you would certainly learn that night.
Of course there was an extra room, but there was no need for that. Despite the last sleepover being five years ago, there was still this feeling of comfort and intimacy shared between you and her.
“I know that sharing a bed has never been an issue for us,” you began. “But, if you wish, I could have the help bring another bed for you.”
“No!” she exclaimed, regretting the haste and reluctance of her answer. “I mean, no. It is not necessary, for your bed is big enough for the both of us.”
You nodded with a smile. “Would you like for me to get a maid to help you get ready to sleep? I might as well call-”
“No, There should be no need. We could help each other, is that not right?” she answered shyly. You were surprised to hear that, but thought nothing of it, ignoring the warmth taking over your body at the mere idea. “I- well, I- I did not mean it like… if you… if you want to. I do not have a problem. If you do, it is alright if you-”
“Yes, it is alright.” you agreed, approaching her and pointing to the bed with your head. “I had a maid bring a sleeping chemise for you… should you like for me to-?”
She nodded, undoing her coiffure before you got to her. “Yes, I should like for you to help me now.”
Francesca didn't know what was going on in herself. Her words seemed to come out before she could process them and her intentions were rather unclear even to herself.
Now, she was in front of you. Your hesitant hands trembled lightly as you started taking her dress off. Francesca let out a soft gasp when your fingers grazed her skin, noticing your closeness as she leaned closer to you, not creating contact just yet but desiring so, so very anxiously. You started undoing her corset slowly, trying to take in every second of proximity existent between you, the fervid hunger invading the moment.
Francesca let out a shaky breath, leaning toward you and, this time, she was actually resting her weight on you timidly. She whispered your name, almost silently enough for you to not hear.
But you always heard her.
Her head was resting on your shoulder, touching your cheek with her cheekbones. “I love you.”
You kissed her cheek gently and then went to her neck. You left slight bites on her skin and moaned as she pressed herself onto you slightly more.
“I love you, too,” you reminded her, and it felt as if it was the very first time you told her so. “I will never not.”
You kissed her shoulders and put your hands on her hips.
“I think we are…” you whimpered as she intertwined your hands with hers. “We are doing something we most likely should not.”
She exhaled with difficulty. “What would that be?”
“I saw them,” you began. “Anne and Petunia, my maids, they- I saw them doing this.”
“This?”
“Making love.”
Your answer left her in a place between confusion and oblivious understanding. She knew, but also she did not.
“What does it mean?”
“I went for a late night walk in the backyard and heard some noises,” you told her. “Chadwick House is not as big as the Devereaux Manor, so we do not need as much help, nor do we have enough room for more. Some of the help that stays at the house has to share a room, so my two lady maids do. I know where their room is, so, upon hearing the sounds, I peeked through the window in case something had happened. And I saw them… As soon as my shock subsided, I ran back to my chambers, but not without seeing them like we are now. They were kissing and touching each other, nude.”
Francesca frowned. “How do you know what it is called?”
“A few days later, I asked Charles about it, but I never said I had seen them. I told him I had heard it somewhere,” you answered. “He panicked and told me not to speak of such things ever again. Then, he said those are things men and women do after they marry, but that some men do it without marrying and that it was normal, but respectable ladies like me could not do so under any circumstance… So, naturally, I ended up asking Anna about it and blaming it on Charles. She said that it is called making love and that people do it to consummate their marriage. I told her that Charles said some men do, but that ladies like me cannot, so she explained to me that it is said that women lose their worth after doing that and must be valuable for deserving a marriage. Also, we could get pregnant when doing it with a man, but men do not have to worry about themselves being with child; I, then, asked if men did it with men or women with women, and she said it was possible but not well seen at all, so I should not do it unless I love and trust the woman, but that I must be careful and not tell a soul about it because it was a display of love, goodness, and intimacy that deserves to be cherished and not broken by society's discrimination. Anne also said that it is supposed to feel quite pleasurable. That is how I know.”
She nodded, taking a few seconds to think about it and analyze the situation.
“Can we… do that?” Francesca asked, some boldness whose origin she unfortunately ignored.
“Oh,” Your eyes met hers as she turned around. “Well, if you want to… I mean, I want to, but only if you do as well, uh… Do you want to?”
“Yes, I want to make love with you.” She smiled confidently.
“Are you sure?”
“I have never been more sure of anything in my life,” Francesca assured you, giving you a quick kiss on the lips. “Can I take off your gown?”
A soft exhale left your lips at the thought. “You can take all of me, my darling.”
Francesca smiled a little, pressing her forehead to yours. Your noses brushed each other's before you kissed.
And, when it happened, you could only describe it as mystical. With her, everything felt like magic.
You thought, more often than not, that you weren't built for this world. You weren't built for this society because you wanted nothing but her and to be able to dance with her at balls, to just say ‘this is my wife’ to everyone you met, to love her freely.
You weren't built for a society that kept you away from her.
You wanted to be with her like this always, to feel the tip of her fingers brush your skin and cause goosebumps, to stand naked before her and her before you, just like you were now.
“What are we supposed to do now?” she asked.
You shrugged. “Shall we find out?”
She chuckled nervously, feeling like the fire lighting up the room was actually inside of her. Francesca nodded, giving you the needed cue to end the distance between you two and kiss her.
It was hesitant at first. You didn't know what to do with your hands, so you just put her hair behind her ear, deepened the kiss, and then cupped her face. Meanwhile, Francesca freed your hair and rested her hands on your shoulders, not knowing what to do either.
She ended the kiss, looking at you with a glint of need in her shy hazel eyes. She sighed, all her fears leaving her body with that exhale. Her hands went to the back of your neck to pull you close and began kissing there, imitating what you were doing when you helped her undress.
You held her by her waist and her hands traveled your shoulders and her fingers drew burning, irregular shapes on your back. “This feels good.”
“It does.” She smiled against your skin.
In an attempt to get closer, you put your leg between hers and pulled her until your skin was on hers. Which also meant that you were close enough for your thigh to touch her core.
The moan she let out was almost delirious and the way her hips bucked in response caused her thigh to stumble upon you.
Your eyes met, both silently agreeing that what you just did felt, oh, so good.
Francesca swallowed hard and looked down as she bucked her hips to provoke the same feeling to both of you.
“God,” you moaned, holding her tightly against you and moving like she moved. “My bed.”
When you pulled apart to go to the bed, a strange emptiness took over you. It was not only emotional, as if missing each other a bit; it was physical, too. A warm and wet something was left on your thighs as a result of your pleasure, which came as a surprise because neither of you had any idea what any of what you were doing was, but you did know how good it felt.
Once you were finally sitting on your bed, you looked at each other as if asking for permission, but then you realized how absurd it was to ask, to wait, to hesitate, so you kissed, this time hungrily and intensely. The way you clumsily returned to your previous position gave away how much you needed each other.
You were so clumsy and careless, that this time it wasn't your thighs but your cores that met, and you cried out at how terribly delicious that contact felt.
“This… feels so…” Francesca began, not able to come up with the words that could describe how she was feeling, so she just kept moving with you and moaning your name loudly.
“Good?” you panted.
“Better than- than good,” she replied, her breath labored. “Great.”
Hearing her be vocal about this was unexpected to say the least. However, you found it exciting and hot. “How do you feel, Fran?” you encouraged her to speak, craving to hear her say things about this very wonderful moment.
“Great,” she replied, a strange pressure building inside her very being. “This- I like… this.”
You kissed her eagerly, harshly, to then ask. “Do you?”
“Yes…” She nodded, kissing you again as your hands traveled to her hips and then used the contact to guide her to be faster and pull her close enough to apply more pressure.
Francesca broke the kiss, her head falling back and giving you access to her neck. You sucked her skin, beginning to notice how she had some burning red spots on the places your mouth has been to before.
A desperate moan left your lips when a sensation started to form deep inside you, and she was feeling it, too. You could only describe it as if you were running from a great distance to a cliff, and everything you were doing in the earthly world made the inside you run faster and faster until you reached the edge. And there, Francesca was waiting for you to see how you slowed down for a second, only so she could hold your hand and jump with you.
In both the earthly and imaginary world, you moaned her name loudly as you fell off the edge of the cliff, or as you came with her.
She moaned and gasped, and hid her head against your neck to muffle the sounds she was making.
“Do not hold back,” you told her, feeling your orgasm last so very long. “I wish to hear you, please.”
Francesca obeyed you, pressing her forehead to yours and moaning your name against your lips.
It was so innocent, yet so sensual. It felt right, but, oh, so immoral. And carnal. And fascinating. Scandalous, beautiful, mystical, sinful.
You didn't stop until it was too much. Her embrace didn't end, and she wanted anything but.
“I love you.” you whispered, guiding her to lie on the bed with you.
She smiled. “I love you, too.”
“I am so happy that you still had love for me.” You kissed her softly.
“I will always have love for you.” Francesca replied.
You stared at each other in silence. Her hand was on your cheek, caressing it, and yours drew delicate patterns on the soft skin of her hips.
“Can we do this again?” Francesca asked.
You smiled. “Can we?”
“I should like that.”
“Me as well.”
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taglist: @swiftholic-13 @kenzieisgone @urmultifandomfan
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squidzillaa · 5 months
Text
Levi DID NOT reject Hange
An explanation and analysis 🦑
First things first, 5 key factors:
1. This scene is from Levi’s pov (another reason why he looks sad and upset, while saying his goal is to kill Zeke.)
2. This chapter parallels to Eren and Mikasa’s “What am I?” scene in chapter 123.
3. Wanting to live with another, is a common trope in AOT. (Isayama’s love language. 😉) 🏠
4. This is one of the most romantic scenes in AOT, I don’t know how this flew over SO many people’s heads?? 😂😂 It’s right in front of your face!
5. Isayama parallels chapter 126 to chapters 52 and 53. (These chapters contain some of the most important interactions between Levi and Hange):
“Right, Levi.?” (Hange knows what Levi meant. 👍🏻)
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“Right… …Levi?” (Does Hange know the answer here? 🤔 Guess… 😏)
Next, in both these chapters, they are being hunted:
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Chapter 52: Hange suggests, “Just for now.”
Chapter 126: Hange suggests, “But for now…”
Chapter 52: Levi states, “If we do nothing but run, then all we can do is get caught.” He knows if they stay, they’ll get caught and possibly stabbed.
Chapter 126: Levi questions, “If we keep running and hiding, what will that get us?” He knows the possible consequences of running away, so why does he ask anyway? 🤔😏:
Now, explanation:
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Levi was only “pretending” to be asleep, in order to hear Hange’s dream. If Levi Was meaning to reject Hange, he WOULD NOT have brought it back up and then avoid the question she asked (while blushing) which was, “Oh so you heard me?” He’s not going to admit that he heard her because he is a TSUNDERE and, like Isayama said, is awkward and clumsy when it comes to romance. ;)
Hange blushes, because she confessed her love to him thinking he was asleep. In the Japanese culture, asking someone to live with you is a way of proposing. IFKK. (If you have common sense 😉, you can recognize that her blush alone shows that she meant it romantically.)
The other main ships also include a similar situation of wanting to “live” with their love interest:
(Obvious one) Eren to Mikasa
Falco to Gabi
Annie to Armin
Hitch to Marlow
Ymir to Historia
Jean to Mikasa
Eren even brings this up in an interview ⬇️, straight up telling viewers that Hange’s line was a proposal and confession! (Another big factor: Eren and Hange parallel each other, just like how Mikasa and Levi do. That’s a BIG character plot point that a lot of fans don’t recognize or realize. Which in itself already tells you who the 2 main lovers of the story are. Cue “Call Your Name.” 👥)
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Levi could have interrupted her if he wanted to reject her proposal or could have straight up said “No we can’t”, “I can’t do that.”, “I don’t want that.” But he didn’t because he Wanted to live with her as well, and was probably imagining a life of just the two of them living in the forest. 💭🌲
He knows that Hange is already preparing to pull him around, so after Eren’s Rumbling announcement, that’s when he decides to get up and ask where Zeke is. He sits up because he wants her to come over to him so he can pop the question of “running and hiding.” Especially because he knows that Eren’s announcement will make Hange want to stop Eren asap. Levi needs to hurry and reask her question before they’re out of that forest and have to focus on their plans, rather than their feelings.
He asks where Zeke is to make her think he was asleep the whole time. (Buttt he blows his cover right away when he asks her what running away will achieve for the 2 of them. 😂)
Levi asking where Zeke is was NOT his first thought, because he was awake the WHOLE time. (Stop trying to make everything about Levi in connection to Erwin and his promise, this scene has nothing to do with him. 👾)
In this chapter, they both have a moment of doubt and confusion:
Hange wasn’t sure if she should continue her duties as Commander, because she’s unsure if they can stop Zeke and they’d be on the run for the rest of their lives.
Levi wasn’t sure if killing Zeke was worth it, because Zeke was willing to die.
Levi restates what Hange said, as a question, because he wanted to know if she Had a good enough reason to leave it all behind.
Levi doesn’t go against Hange’s ideas and encourage them often. Levi loves and trusts Hange SO MUCH, that he was willing to give up on his promise to Erwin and his comrade’s, if Hange had given him a good enough reason to stay. But of course he knows Hange can’t stay out of the action and that they have their promises and duties to achieve first. ☹️🤝🏻🌲 (Along with the guilt that would come with it.) To what ifs.. 🥂
In conclusion, Levi and Hange’s “freedom”, are each other. KAWWW 🦅
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(Looking at Their Freedom)
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charismaofobedience · 11 months
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what makes you think mikoto is good rep? specifically, what is it about double that convinces you?
Okay okay, it took me some time to perfectly articulate my thoughts on how MIkotos system isn't horrible rep and instead was tackled... Somewhat well? This was also written after me and another friend who's a system discussed this extensively and how our own situations lowkey match the situation Mikoto himself is facing. Under the cut because I did *not* expect this to get so long </3
To start it off with some debunking of things people have been mentioning as "oh but this proves he's not a system" (after Milgram itself confirmed them as one but oh well), the whole thing on how DID only appears during childhood isn't... Really the full truth? The most common thing to happen with DID is, instead, for someone to develop the conditions for it through their childhood, but the symptoms only start showing when older. I myself was a case of that and while it started around my 6 years, we only had our first split at 14. Mikotos just happen to be later. I personally also think that, during the phone call with his mom, there wouldn't just have a random baby crying noise for no reason. He probably developed it that early, but just didn't split until recently, however that's just my own reading and not anything confirmed.
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For the point of "but then, why don't the milgram rules work on John if he is indeed the killer? This proves it's Mikoto who killed", just look at irl court cases of systems. The one being judged will always be the host almost all the times, after all, he's the main one who fronts, and not whichever alter committed the murder. The host and body would be the one in jail etc in a real life prison, not the alter who committed it. Milgram is a perfect parallel to that, with Mikoto being restrained and the Es barrier working on him even if he didn't commit any murder while John, the alter and one who committed the crime, doesn't has any restraints or barrier that work on him. Because Mikoto is the host and core of their system, not John.
Second, some quick system terminology. I'll be using the terms host, protector/persecutor and dormancy on this, so for a quick understanding: Host means that, basically, that alter is the one who mainly fronts and takes care of things, may or may not be the core ("original" person), but at Mikotos case I'll assume he's both the core and the host. Protector is what the name implies, they're alters who have as their purpose to protect the system and body. Persecutors just so happen to be protectors who have more drastic means to do things and will inherently be harmful to the system in a way in another, they are not necessarily bad, and might instead just be misguided and think what they are doing is a solution for a issue and that by doing so they're protecting the system. Finally, dormancy is when an alter of a system... Well, goes into dormancy. They can't come to front anymore and will be "asleep" for some time or even forever depending on the conditions. A inclusion is also possible, where two alters (or more) will become one etc, but I don't think that will be the case for Mikoto.
So, as it's settled, Mikoto is the Host and Core of the system and Orekoto/John is the Protector/Persecutor of it. Let's get to the explanation now.
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Mikoto's split seemingly very much occurred due to the stress situation he had been feeling from his work. We have John welcoming him home twice through the mv and noticing that Mikoto isn't smiling or anything when coming home anymore and it isn't the only times judging by the "another day" mention. We can see on the second one he's either getting the subway to go home or go to work (probably the first one), but on the first time it's said we get to see Mikoto's phone and, specifically, messages coming through and through.
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All the texts are coming from his boss, and from the looks of it Mikoto works for a black company in Japan, so it's no wonder he's stressed and very clearly depressed there. Judging by the time Mikoto would be going back home at midnight and, at that time, he's texted by his boss that he needs to remake a whole product and correct mistakes from another thing for the next day of work, and with "next day" you can bet they mean "when i see you in around 10 hours". For now, this is the main reasoning and sustenance we have for "but why did he split?", aka, Mikoto was under a lot of stress on work and it lingered even when he was home to the point that, eventually, John split as himself and, as himself said, he's got Mikoto, and he could leave it all to him.
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By this point I like to think it was already John fronting to reply to the boss call. John got tired of Mikoto overworking himself to the brink of breaking down to appease to his boss and superiors and, wanting to help, came to front to "take it all on" in his own words. I think bringing MeMe up for Double discussion is extremely important because we have to remember that MeMe was visibly only from Mikoto's point of view while in Double we have John telling his own point of view. I don't think Mikoto is lying about not knowing he's a system etc, but instead that Mikoto thinks something is wrong, yes, that he knows whoever this person ruining his life is both not him and him at the same time (mirror scene), but isn't aware exactly that he's a system. John is portrayed as scary and evil and cruel etc in MeMe because that's what Mikoto assumes to be happening, Mikoto doesn't know whatever John is doing and what are his intentions, we knew since them Mikoto is the type of guy to take things happening to him lightly (joking about the milgram situation etc) because he may think he deserves it, and this extended to his work and personal life. Through MeMe we see Mikoto looking sad and not smiling anytime until we got to the ending in the headspace where he's sitting on the couch somewhat smiling, but not looking downright miserable like he is in double because Mikoto's main focus was that there is some scary guy there, not that his work life was putting him under so much strain to the point of splitting. Hell, his work life was never brought up until Double anyways, because Mikoto didn't think it was important and kept playing as if it was cool (even during the call with his mom in Double, as John showed us) and that he could handle it, meanwhile Double has John showing us just how miserable Mikoto looked after work and some situations that would happen on his day to day work, how he never went back home smiling etc. MeMe has a bigger focus on Mikoto, as a Host, not knowing that he's a system and how scary that can feel when you're fully unaware of why you're seemingly doing certain actions that you're not aware of when they're brought up to you, meanwhile Double focuses on his alter, John, telling us about his own motivations and the truth about Mikoto's daily life, showing us that whatever it is he did was to protect Mikoto because being a protector is his role in the system. Mikoto didn't take his issues seriously in MeMe, and in Double John gives us a glimpse on how bad it was. For Mikoto, all of his personal issues were coming from the fact that there was an Evil Scary Serial Killer guy around, while John tells us that nuh uh, it was capitalism all along and he'll protect Mikoto from that stress.
The voice drama also tracks some of these points, such as Es mentioning that Mikoto laughs whenever he's troubled and rarely gets angry or frustrated, ignoring problems, and Es mentioning that John acts more rationally, contrary to what he expected... After all, Es' only views of John came from MeMe as a mv, and then from John getting angry and frustrated as Es because, in the beginning, to John it all felt like people were trying to trouble and hurt Mikoto yet again. He was just doing his job as a protector.
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I've seen most people say that the "made me a scoundrel" refers to us, the viewers, but also... I feel it might also just be John talking with Mikoto himself. Mikoto saw John as a evil bad alter on MeMe as we just discussed, and from what we see here... Yes, John is violent and impulsive, but he's still a protector who did things with the goal of "I need to protect Mikoto" in mind. We didn't knew that through the entirety of MeMe because Mikoto himself didn't know, and John might be frustrated that the guilty verdict could have come only because Mikoto portrayed himself in such a way first and foremost. John asks him why he's crying because I'm fairly sure he isn't aware that Mikoto isn't aware of him either. The main issue at play here is the fact their system communication is horrible if not non existent. They can't communicate with each other properly for some reason even through writing etc, so there's no way for them to be certain of how the other feels. There's no way for Mikoto to know why John was doing all that. There's no way for Mikoto to know John was trying to protect and help him.
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John in the middle of Double even states that he doesn't know why he's there. So yes, most of us are all assuming it was all due to Mikoto's stress with work, but hell we could all be wrong because, again, Mikoto refuses to open up and actually talk about issues with anyone. "Come to know me as an honest man" is John asking for all of us and Es to go and know him as himself, as John the alter, and not the vision Mikoto had of him on MeMe and the entirety of trial one. Because yes, you can't change the violent nature of his, but we should at least come to know and understand that he is a protector and was simply trying his best to protect Mikoto from something (what? We don't know and can't be sure, but yet again, our best bet for now is his job). John is seemingly willing to open up more this trial, admitting he is indeed the one who committed the murder and asking Es to understand the situation they're being put under, with Mikoto feeling stressed and please forgive him, because Mikoto is not the one who committed the murders. I'm sure we will get more on their situation etc when the questions for Mikoto and Kotoko come, but for now we only have that.
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John simply wished to save and protect Mikoto, he himself doesn't know how it all ended like *this* (Mikoto as guilty and not innocent, running away from him on the train because, again, Mikoto isn't aware John is simply trying to help him). Having John asking us to forgive Mikoto many times through both the mv (first image of these 3) and voice drama (next screenshot) basically affirms his beliefs and wishes, that he wants us to guilt him, but not Mikoto. After all, if we get another guilty verdict? In his own words Mikoto will go into dormancy due to the stressful situations of having two guilty verdicts in a row, but if Mikoto gets a innocent this time around? Then, there will be less need for John to front... After all, if the situation becomes a bit more calming for them, then John's purpose of protecting Mikoto will be gone for some time... What we can't have, however, Is Mikoto going into dormancy and then forcing John as the new host, because John wouldn't know what to do by then. He was born to be a protector and his identity is intrinsically connected to this role, the duty of protecting Mikoto, for him, comes above him as his own person. With Mikoto's dormancy, John himself would lose his purpose and motive of existing.
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And even so, John apologizes at the end of the milgram, questioning even his own existence that "none of this wouldn't have happened if I wasn't even born". In John's eyes, he failed on his role of a protector by getting Mikoto into this situation. The protector guilt is shown so greatly on John that I did tear up a bit when first watching the Double mv and reading the lyrics. The fact they expanded away from the "scary evil alter" troupe that Mikoto made us belief in trial 1 into a protector/persecutor who feels guilt that his actions caused harm to the host? Into a protector with low empathy who cares more for the well being of their host than his own? Mikoto was neutral on the scale of "is this good system rep" for me initially because, again, Mikoto himself didn't know he was a system. Now we got more information on how things work thanks to John and, from the feelings of how scary finding out there's someone else besides you to the fear of realizing that the person who did whatever the hell it was wasn't you mentally, but it physically was you at the same time is terrifying. I think their writing was very well handled to cover the topics of fear and guilt from both sides. Mikoto is still a host who's unaware of the fact he's a system. John is a protector who feels like he failed on his role after getting Mikoto into this mess. Their communication, due to seemingly being a recent split, is non existent so they cant fully talk with each other to comprehend the other. To me, this is a perfect example of how it felt when I myself found out I wasn't a singlet. I don't think Mikoto's writing is perfect and has no flaws, not at all, but on the grander scale of things? Having this type of rep coming from a japanese song media franchise is great and almost unseen since it's mostly always used as a joke or for the scary evil alter trope alone. Milgram and the team could do some stuff better, sure, but from what we have right now? It's far from me of calling them "bad system representation". After all, just like John tells Mikoto, they're both doing their best.
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hiii i just found your blog, I LOVE HOW YOU WRITE, and if i can request like an angsty story about house and wilson with reader, and the reader has like some disease that'll kill her😭😭😭😭😭im just craving angst
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YOU ARE SO SWEET THANK YOU 💞💞 it's been awhile since I've written a good angst fic so this is perfect for me
Your Last Breath (Greg House x gn reader x James Wilson)
Warnings: talk of hospitals/medical procedures, reader has a mystery illness that kills them, they/them pronouns used a few times to refer to the reader in a gender neutral way, hurt/no comfort, heavy angst, main character death (spoiler: it's you)
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The doctors had been trying for months to figure out what was wrong with you. Months of invasive tests, months of going back and forth with possible explanations, months of being put on temporary treatments that seemed to work for a short while before you eventually succumbed to whatever was causing your problems again.
Everyone was stumped, and by everyone I truly do mean everyone. Not even House could figure out what was wrong, something that frustrated him to no end for multiple reasons. And by the time he was finally able to figure out what the cause was, it was already too late.
The disease had progressed too far along on its course for the doctors to be able to treat it properly. The best they could do was make you comfortable for the few weeks you had left to live.
Usually he liked having cases he couldn't crack, he liked figuring out the puzzle of what was bothering his patient, he liked being able to go to Cuddy and say "I told you so" when it ended up him being right and everyone else was wrong. But not this time.
This time all he wanted to do was curl up into a ball and die. If only. He'd gladly give up both of his legs if it meant you'd get better.
Meanwhile, the resident head of oncology wasn't taking the news very well, either. It was normal for House to shut himself away for extended periods of time, but not Wilson. He barely left his office anymore, not to check on his own patients, not to accept a request for a consult, nothing. In fact, the only time he ever did leave was to visit you.
Most nights were spent with either him or House at your side, checking your vitals and fetching whatever it was that you needed. You ended up having to beg the both of them to go home at some point, even if it was to just shower and change, but they still refused, choosing to stay at the hospital instead.
Occasionally one of the ducklings would stop by if either of them couldn't for some reason, whether that be due to another patient needing attention or because you finally convinced them to take a break for once.
Foreman was solemn, talking about arrangements that could possibly be made for your body after death if you hadn't decided already. Cameron was sympathetic, reassuring you that they'd make sure you wouldn't be in any pain during your last days on earth. Chase was playful, trying to take your mind off things by cracking a joke or two. And Cuddy was surprisingly very nurturing when she managed to make the time to check in on you.
The whole thing was very bittersweet. While you appreciated everyone caring so much about you, it hurt to know why they were doing it.
Your final day was surprisingly quiet, with no nurses stopping by to check on you every hour or so like they had been for the past couple of weeks where you'd been bedridden almost completely. You suspected someone had requested for that, so you could have a bit of peace in the last few hours you'd be alive for.
House stood at the foot of your bed, watching as you slept. He looked like he was about to say something when Wilson suddenly spoke up from the armchair beside your bed.
"Don't even think about it, House. You're not waking them up right now."
Despite Wilson's firm tone, House couldn't help but roll his eyes. "Oh, come on. It's not like it matters much, they're going to be dead soon anyway."
It took everything in the oncologist not to snap and strangle the man in front of him. The only thing that managed to stop him was the sound of you letting out a hacking cough as you woke up. Even with the oxygen machine, it had become increasingly more difficult for you to breathe.
"Guys, don't fight," you tried to make your tone stern as you lectured them, but your throat was dry and therefore made your voice weak and raspy when you spoke.
"Hey, hey, don't speak, it's alright," Wilson gently reassured you as he reached out to take one of your hands into his. Your skin felt clammy, but he didn't care.
House had a pained look in his eyes as he watched you, but he did his best to cover it up with his usual snark. "We were just talking about you. Trying to figure out who should get your stuff when you die."
Wilson gave him an evil look, but you simply laughed. At least, they thought you laughed. It was kind of hard to tell given how sick you were.
"You guys are funny."
If it were any other time, House would've beamed with pride and joy at being able to make you smile with one of his quips, but this time he just felt empty inside, knowing that it was possibly the last one you'd ever hear. He quietly observed as Wilson helped you drink some water out of a small paper cup, one hand helping you hold it up to your lips while the other rested on your shoulder.
"Thank you," was the only thing you managed to get out once you were done, your breathing stalling yet again when you tried to speak. The three of you knew it was getting close to when it was going to happen. The problem was that only one of you had accepted it, and it wasn't either one of the two doctors who were in the room.
"I love you guys," ended up being your final words, a bittersweet smile on your face and tears in your eyes as you took your last breath. You hoped they knew that you meant that. You hoped they knew that you didn't blame them.
And you hoped that your death helped to bring them closer together rather than tearing them apart. Maybe it was wishful thinking, but who really cared? It's not like you'd be around to witness it anyway.
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End notes: I rarely ever finish a request this early so please don't expect this to become a normal thing 😭 I just got really into writing this for some reason and once I started I just couldn't stop
Likes < reblogs | comments are greatly appreciated | requests are currently open
Main masterlist | House MD masterlist | wanna be added to my taglist?
🏷 taglist: @pigeonmama @caplanreblogsfics
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inuhalfdemon · 4 months
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Alastor was in his main room within the hotel. He had just hung up his jacket and was setting aside his bowtie when a golden-glowing portal formed beside his door, Lucifer stepping out.
Lucifer cleared his throat; his portal snapping closed behind him.
“Hey, Al…sorry for stopping by unannounced.” He paused. “Are those wards of yours still up and working?”
“Yes.” Alastor turned, glaring at him.
“Oh, good.”
“Wh-?”
Lucifer exploded into his winged-devil form; hurling himself at Alastor and painfully pinning him to the wall. Photo frames and a variety of décor fell and crashed to the floor.
“YOU FUCKING MADE A DEAL WITH CHARLIE!?” He roared into Alastor’s face.
“Wait! Just wait! Lucifer, let me explain!” Alastor struggled. Despite his height; Lucifer had leveraged himself at the end of a sofa that Alastor kept against that particular wall and he was finding it hard to find his footing with how high Lucifer had pinned him. His ears laid flat and his eyes were wide.
He hadn’t anticipated Lucifer finding out about his deal with Charlie so quickly nor had he properly considered the King’s response.
“EXPLAIN IT THEN!” Lucifer shoved against him and Alastor thought his chest might just cave in.
Air rushed from Alastor’s lungs and he wheezed; trying to gulp more in.
“I did it- I did it for the power!”
“HOW DOES THAT ANSWER MAKE THIS SITUATION ANY BETTER FOR YOU!?”
Lucifer’s grip on him sharply tightened; his eyes glowing and burning hotter.
“Careful, Luci….please…I’m not Lilith…you could actually kill me!”
“I JUST MIGHT…” Lucifer hissed; spitting into his face. “YOU THINK THAT I’D RAISE A HAND TO LILITH!? YOU THINK THAT SHE’D INVOKE MY WRATH TO SUCH AN EXTENT!?”
“No, no, no –“ Alastor was shaking now. “That’s not why I said it- I-“
“YOU’RE SUCH A FUCKING LITTLE COCK-“
“HEY!” Alastor shouted back at him then in deeply offended resentment.
“-ROACH” Lucifer finished.
“Oh, yeah….okay.”
Lucifer seethed at him and Alastor took a risk at furthering his explanation.
“Look, it was a very simple deal that I made with Charlie. A deal of favors. I made it because I had something to offer and the added power I get from making a deal like that – with someone like Charlie – it’s significant. It could prove to be beneficial to us when it comes time to defend the hotel.” Alastor reasoned. He withheld the points that: he did it as a small backhand at Lucifer - banking on that his continuing deal with Lilith protected him from any real consequential harm; and that it might be a very valuable get-out-jail-free card he could use in breaking one - or even two - of his chains at some point.
“VOID. IT.” Lucifer growled at him, deep and menacingly, emphasizing both words with precision.
“I can’t…you know I can’t!” Alastor told him, honestly. “My part of the deal is complete.”
“THEN ASK HER TO MAKE YOU A FUCKING SANDWICH.”
“A: That would be rather rude. B: It’s not quite that simple. It has to be a favor that only Charlie could provide for me; something only within her possession, power or ability that I can request from her and her only. She likely doesn’t even have anything like that yet!”
One favor at the time of my choosing where she harms no one…but, Alastor didn’t bother delving into those little details.
“WHAT A FUCKING-“ Lucifer shoved him again and then pushed away; letting him go.
Alastor slid to the floor; his feet catching him but his legs wobbled and buckled and he just went to the ground.
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Excerpt from my "No One Can Know..." radioapple fanfic
Taglist: @helluva-simper
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admiringlove · 1 year
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part one.
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[19:12] . . .
suna thinks he's lost his mind. or maybe, you've taken all his senses with you when you left that night. maybe he's slowly going crazy—sort of like the main character of that one show you love to watch. the schizophrenic lady slowly losing her senses but not understanding what's going on.
perhaps calling himself crazy would be an overstatement. but you had him confused and dazed, nonetheless.
he thinks he's done something wrong. but he doesn't know what it is. why else would you leave in the middle of the fucking night after the things you two had done together? he's sitting in the living room, one hand in his hair and phone in the other. he's texting osamu, telling him about your amorous endeavors from that night. it had been roughly two weeks since then. and if he was correct(and not borderline insane), you hated his guts.
he wasn't sure why, though. had he not performed well? when the two of you had done "it", did he not please you? what was the issue here? you didn't sound like you hated it, in fact, you sounded quite the opposite throughout.
his phone rings. it's osamu.
"hey-"
"you did what with [y/n]?!" suna has to move the phone away from his ears for that one. his eyebrows knot as he puts the call on speaker, not understanding why osamu of all people is having such an outburst. it's usually atsumu who's the annoying one with no sense of rationality.
"we um," rintarō's face flushes red. he even hides his face with his palms, even though his grey-haired best friend can't see him, "we had sex."
"oh my fuckin' god," the younger miya twin throws more profanities on the phone, but rintarō chooses to tune them out. but then osamu continues, "do ya even know what ya've done? are ya stupid? do ya have no common-fucking-sense? sunarin, for fuck's sake, how can ya be less emotionally intelligent than a fuckin' celery?"
"stop swearing at me, you jackass!" the middle-blocker picks up his phone, almost yelling into it. he then narrows his eyes, lips pursed as he asks, "what exactly did i do wrong?"
"ya do fuckin' realize," suna assumes what osamu's doing is taking a bite out of an apple between his sentences, "ya had a girlfriend a month ago. a pretty fuckin' serious one, at that."
"oh," suna's train of thought stops. oh, shit. fuck, fuck, fuck. what the hell had he done? oh my god.
"yeah, 'oh'. what the bloody hell were ya thinking?" osamu swears again. but this time, rintarō thinks he might've deserved it. all of it. you ignoring him, osamu swearing at him, that nagging feeling at the back of his throat. and that pang in his chest when you left with your things at four o'clock in the fucking morning.
"ya do realize, [y/n] prolly feels more like shit than you do. they haven't spoken to me or 'tsumu after that night. i thought they dropped off the face of the earth until akaashi-san said they were havin' some kinda crisis so they were busy. turns out [y/n] hasn't been showin' up for lectures either," osamu drones on for a few minutes. then it strikes suna. he hadn't even bothered to give you an explanation about why he broke up with his girlfriend.
or actually, she broke up with him. because of you. his mind wavers at the memories of that night where she called him to the local diner to tell him off. she even told everyone it was a mutual break-up and that it didn't work out. he was just glad she fell out of love with him before he accidentally broke her heart. she had every right to do what she did. he was a total, complete twat who didn't know what he was doing. he had hurt so many people, because in actuality, he was just as emotionally stupid as atsumu.
to be honest, even atsumu isn't this stupid. suna has to give that guy some credit.
"what do you even feel about [y/n], sunarin? do ya like them? or didja use them 'cause you were bored 'n wanted ta get yer dick wet?" the accusation makes the middle-blocker wince.
"jesus christ, give me some credit, dude. of course i like them. you know, i never told any of you this, but michi broke up with me because of [y/n]."
"wait, hold on, what? what the fuck?"
"yeah, um," suna hates admitting that he's wrong. gosh, he has to, though. he's done enough. he doesn't want to hurt you any longer, "apparently, i was in love with [y/n] all along and didn't know it."
"oh my god," osamu literally gives up. rintarō can hear his friend facepalm through the phone, "yer such a screwed up person, man. didja even bother telling them this?"
"about that-"
"ya didn't tell 'em. wow. what else could i expect from someone with the emotional range of a fuckin' goldfish? just cut the damn call, already. i got shit to do. and go tell [y/n] all of this or i'll break yer legs the next time i see ya." beep, beep, beep.
he actually ended the call himself. huh, suna thinks to himself. but then he tosses his phone into the pocket of his sweats, pulls on a hoodie, and leaves his apartment.
he's not coming back without making it up to you. no fucking way. all the while that he's driving to your place, he curses at himself for being such a complete and utter dunce. and when he finally stands outside your door, his hands are sweaty and shaking. he's never even been this nervous for a match.
he knocks thrice. dum, dum, dum. then twice, dum, dum. then once, dum.
this was how you guys had communicated in high school. when something went terribly wrong and you needed each other's company. three, two, one. slowly. this was how he'd knocked on the door of the broom closet after school when you were inside having a panic attack. it was how you'd knocked on his bedroom door after they'd lost the match to karasuno in second year.
"go away, rin," you croaked from the inside, "i don't wanna see you."
"'course you don't. i'm an asshole," he says, "but i know where the spare key is and i'll trespass on you if you don't open this door right now."
the door opens a mere second later. you stand there in an oversized tee and shorts, hair a complete mess and eyes glassy. your under-eyes had swollen up too. this was all... because of him?
"the fuck do you want now? more sex?" you ask crudely. he almost scoffs, but he's clearly in the wrong here. you were his best friend. you had the right to abuse him like this because he'd used you. hell, you should be saying more than things like this.
"i'm sorry," he tries to hold your hand, but you move away from him. he feels his heart crack and his throat close up, but he continues, "do you know why michi and i broke up?"
"oh god, " you scoff, "if this is why you're here. please leave."
"listen to me," he holds your shoulders. you visibly look agitated and angry. you have every right to, of course. but you have to hear this. he has to say this. he goes on, "michi left me. i didn't leave her but she left me. don't you want to know why?"
"let me guess, she got fed up with your piece-of-shit attitude?" you walk away, to the kitchen as you turn on the coffee-maker. he chases after you, grabbing you by your shoulders again. you almost push him off.
"because i love you, goddamnit!" he shakes you lightly, "do you understand? she wasn't you. she understood that from the very beginning! that's she why left me."
"oh," you blink slowly, drinking it in, "oh."
"'oh'? that's all you have to say?"
"oh please, rintarō," you roll your eyes, "i've been in love with you since freshman year of high-school and you didn't fucking notice. you are genuinely the most stupid person i have ever met. you know, atsumu knew from the very beginning. he's an idiot, sure, but he's actually really smart when he wants to. osamu knows too- why are you looking at me like i'm a terrorist or something?"
oh. what the heck?
"you were in love with me for five years and didn't even bother saying anything? even the fucking twins know? you do realize, this whole thing could've been avoided if you had just told me you liked me before i said okay to that date with michi a few months ago."
"hey, you don't get to come here and tell me i've done something wrong when you realized you were in love with me because michi, of all people, told you. you didn't have the balls to do that part on your own? instead, you come and sleep with me-"
"i thought that made it very clear that i liked you, come on-"
"absolutely not."
"not even a little bit?"
"no."
"oh come on," he nudges as you pour yourself coffee, "maybe a little?"
you smile. he mentally lets out a huge sigh.
"fuck you, yeah, maybe a little," you mutter. he wants to punch the air and kick it and jump around as if he's five-years-old again. because what the hell? he bickered with you and that's all it took to make you smile. holy shit, he thinks.
"go on a date with me," he slides his arms around your waist in the kitchen. you chuckle, holding back a laugh, "no."
"come on, please?" he whines into your ear, placing a chaste kiss on your shoulder, "just five minutes of your time next weekend. i promise it'll be worth it."
"five minutes?" you look back, an eyebrow raised, "you sure? i'll put a timer on my phone and everything."
"shut up," he tells you. then, you grin, "make me."
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notes: then they kiss, kiss, fell in love.
© all works belong to admiringlove on tumblr. plagiarism is strictly prohibited.
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shera-dnd · 8 months
Text
Alright I have eaten my mato peach and have gained the amazing power to do literary and thematic analysis of any piece of media, no matter how fucking stupid
and as the first activation of my ability, I'm turning it towards the stupid ecchi reverse slave harem manga, Mato Seihei no Slave (or Chained Soldier if you're not as much of a fucking weeb as I am) in order to prove that this is actually thematically consistent and surprisingly well written
(long pause as I let all my followers block me and leave)
but first to address the two shuuki in the room
WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU MEAN YOU'VE BEEN READING AN ECCHI SLAVE HAREM MANGA YOU FUCKING WEIRDO?
Look... LOOK! It's not what you think!
Okay so like a lot of anime and manga recently (primarily isekai) have been including slavery as a thing in their world building, and tho I'm not gonna claim that's the only thing it ever gets used for, it's quite clear that a lot of people are only using that as an excuse for kinky slave play BDSM
and then forget that that stuff comes with like... you know, the horrific implications of slavery as an institution
WELL GOOD NEWS! The author of this manga does not give a shit about disguising his femdom slave play kink as commentary on slavery, this is literally just a BDSM thing and it never pretends to be anything else
...besides, a woman has needs, okay?
WAIT SHOULDN'T THIS MANGA TRIGGER YOU? ISN'T YOUR TRIGGER THE LITERAL CENTRAL GIMMICK OF THIS?
YOU WOULD BE CORRECT! By all logical means I should not be able to read this manga without having the most viscerally negative response possible... except that I don't
I'm not gonna pretend that I know why or how this is working
But I read Monster Musume back in 2015 and it somehow helped me get over my fear of spiders, SO WHO KNOWS maybe niche ecchi manga are how I get over my mental blocks
I would rather it wasn't, but I'm having a hard time proving otherwise!
oh god we're already 400 words in and I have only just finished the preamble. Why am I like this?
Okay okay let us get started as I'll give a detailed explanation as to why Mato Seihei no Slave is about the bonds between people, the ways we bring out the best in each other, and what makes a good dom- ahem I mean leader... what makes a good leader
So for those who don't know the central conceit of this story is that this is a world where women get super powers and men get... to be stay at home husbands
Our protagonist is male wife supreme, Yuuki Wakura, whose main hobbies include cooking, cleaning, and day dreaming about one day becoming a hero
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unfortunately for our adorable little boy toy he immediately finds himself falling through a portal into actual literal hell (technically it's called Mato, but like it's just hell) where he's promptly attacked by several giant monsters
BUT GOOD NEWS FOR HIM! He's being saved by a hyper competent hot woman in a uniform (lesbians going "it should have been me!" count should be at 1 by now)
BAD NEWS FOR HIM! She's alone and soon they both get overwhelmed because she can't go full apeshit murder mode while protecting his soft boy ass
Thankfully there is a way for her to save him still, it just requires some collaboration from him
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("it should have been me!" count: 2)
And here we are at the main fucking gimmick. The reason why all the ecchi shit happens, the silly excuse for why this bad bitch decides to keep this guy at her side
Chains of Eternity: Slave
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Kyouka Uzen (the ultimate girl boss) can forge a contract with someone to bind them to her will as her slave. This will bring out their hidden potential and allow them to fight by her side, turning them into a super powerful killing machine at her command.
In exchange once the task is done she must give a reward to her slave based on the difficulty of the task and the slave's "latent desires"
So yeah, Kyouka doesn't get to decide what the reward is, Yuuki doesn't get to decide what the reward is, only Kyouka's magic can decide what the reward is. Which basically just means the author gets to insert whatever horny fuckery they want into this
Rewards vary from giving him head pats, offering him treats, giving him a back massage, kissing him, to...
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well this is a femdom series for a reason
(I think the "it should have been me!" count is at like a 4 or a 5 now)
and now I'm gonna analyze the ever loving shit out of that ability and how it is the crux to all the themes of the show and actually informs us on the nature of Kyouka's character
no, I'm not kidding
Okay so let me just break down what Slave does here from a kink point of view. It basically allows Kyouka and Yuuki to enter into a BDSM relationship where the dom always knows what the sub wants, while still being able to surprise the sub with her actions. She gets to constantly keep her sub beneath her, while also being magically required to reward him and give him aftercare once she's done
Those two have entered a ridiculously healthy BDSM relationship by forging a magical contract that lets them skip all the negotiation bits and go right to what the audience wants to see
(yeah it's gonna be impossible to track the "it should have been me!"s from this point on, so just try to keep your own count at home)
This is also the author's way of like having his cake and fucking it too
Because that way we can have Kyouka as the baddest bitch to ever live AND have her do embarrassing stuff with Yuuki without ever breaking character. In fact the loftier her goals and the more tragic her backstory the more reason she has to accept the reward mechanism as the price to pay for this power
It's also why Kyouka is easily the most developed and interesting character of the manga, to the point that Yuuki is more a supporting character to her arc
This brings us back to those three themes I mentioned waaaaay at the start
Starting with: "how we bring out the best in each other"
For starters it's quite obvious how that works with Yuuki. He wants to be a hero in a world where he should not be able to have super powers, and in comes Kyouka who gives him both the power and the purpose to achieve that goal
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But this also extends to literally everyone in Unit Seven and beyond
We have seen the ways in which Kyouka has helped all of her team mates grow stronger and overcome their past traumas, some times by the sheer confidence and kindness of her presence
Hell we see one of her team mates unlock a rage mode power up because someone said Kyouka was a bad leader
and there's even another team leader who straight up evolved her powers into a new stronger form just out of sheer love and respect for Kyouka
This culminates in the development of Lending. The ability to let others take Yuuki's chain and use him in combat
and like I'm not stupid, I'm not gonna pretend this isn't primarily an excuse to have different hot women give Yuuki rewards in ever hornier scenarios, with the added benefit of being able to design cooler monster forms for him
and I mean... those are some really cool monster forms
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But that's besides the point
The point is that this also pulls double duty by allowing Kyouka and Yuuki to constantly empower all of the people around them and help them through their character arcs
From helping people stand up to abusive family members, to allowing others to gain the confidence they need to grow, to just decking an asshole real hard in the face
And not once does Yuuki steal other's glory. The final confrontation and the catharsis is always delivered by the person who is being helped. Because lover boy here is the supporting character in his own story
This all leads neatly into another point: the bonds we have with others
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DAMN RIGHT MOTHERFUCKERS WE'RE GETTING CHAIN SYMBOLISM IN THIS BITCH!
Oh are we getting a message about how we're all links in the chain and the stronger each of us gets the stronger we all get? FUCK YEAH
Are we getting chains as a representation of a mutual bond of trust and respect, and get to see those bonds be used as a literal weapon to defeat a foe who is antithetical to that idea? ABSOLUTELY
TEAM WORK MAKES THE DREAM WORK, BABY!
But wait there's more! We got a character who can copy other people's skills and she also grows like crazy with each person she bonds with
We got teams of heroes besting villains who refuse to work with anyone
THAT'S THE SHONEN ANIME GOODNESS WE'RE HERE FOR!
(I mean this is technically seinen but who gives a shit, right?)
And that brings us finally to the third point, the series antagonists, and Kyouka's main goal
What makes a good leader?
So far we've focused on Kyouka and her ability, Slave, and how that allows her to help the people around her grow and encourages her to fight on the front line where she can be a shining example for all around her to follow
She treats everyone around her with trust and respect, even the boy who is literally her slave, and is by all metrics BEST GIRL!
Now all of that good shit doesn't mean much if we don't have anything to contrast and compare to
Enter Ren Yamashiro
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gonna give y'all a second to simp for a bit before I continue
done staring at her legs? good. Anyways here's why she's awful!
Ren is the commander of the Anti-Demon Corps and easily the strongest character in the setting by a wide margin
She's also self centered, corrupt, physically AND emotionally abusive, horrifically petty, and likes dogs in the exact same way Makima from Chainsaw Man likes dogs
This is, of course, perfectly translated into her special ability, because this author loves having abilities inform characters
So not only does she have some absurd broken power that she has the power of anime and buddha on her side, BUT the way it manifests is as kanji covering her eyes whenever she activates her skills
Quite literally making so all she can see is her own power and greatness
AND her main use of her powers is to fly around, so she can be ABOVE everyone else
This isn't fucking subtle, but it sure as fuck gets the point across
This is a trait that Ren shares with ALL the main villains of the series. Each and everyone of them is blinded by their own greatness and is constantly looking down on others
Ren is just the least subtle. I guess they had to compensate for the fact that she isn't an actual literal evil god
And so all of those are put in opposition to Kyouka, whose goal is to overthrow Ren, become the new commander, and destroy Mato for good
The woman whose power makes her dependent on others, but that allows her to bring out the best in everyone she meets
A power that grows stronger the more people she helps and the more people help her in return
Standing up against all these people who refuse to rely on anything besides their own strength
That is why Kyouka is the shining example of a good leader!
Now here we are 2k words into this (OH DEAR GOD WHY AM I LIKE THIS), so what was the point of this journey?
Is it me recommending this manga to people and claiming it's genuinely "peak fiction"? OH GOD NO
This thing has so many issues and literally all of them stem from the fact that this is an ecchi harem manga story first and foremost.
Titillation always comes first over anything else, several of the smaller side characters eventually devolve into just different flavors of wanting to dom Yuuki, and that's not even going into all the pet play stuff featuring Ren
This is an unashamedly horny manga with a very specific brand of kink in mind and when I started reading it that was legit all I wanted out of it
But then it refused to be JUST that. It had an interesting story, fun action scenes, compelling characters, and a surprising amount of thought put into its themes
It's not a manga I'd recommend to most people at all, and it requires a considerable amount of tolerance for some capital H Horny anime bullshit
But honestly? If you're cool with that and want a fun and a little unhinged story you can do way worse than this
So what else is left to say except
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IT SHOULD HAVE BEEN ME!!!!
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juniorfor2 · 2 months
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I cannot believe that Ryan Condal seems to be making ANOTHER character in the show his mouthpiece (and for some bullshit magic explanation). Jace would never say, “our Valyrian histories, meant to gild us in glory.” Where does that work with his character, where has his characterization developed to make us think he would say such a thing? Oh wait, it hasn’t. Also, there would have been plenty of Valyrians who couldn’t ride dragons, why would they lie?
I had heard that Ryan Condal didn’t believe that one needed dragon rider blood to ride a dragon, but I didn’t think they’d be shoving it in so soon like that. And I knew that he fundamentally misunderstood magic in ASOIAF, but did he really have to be so weird about it. And just throw out all the lore?
One thing a writer MUST understand when it comes to magic, is that it must be grounded. It cannot have rules that are thrown out at a moment’s convenience, it must have very clear lines that are not to be broken. If a crystal ball gives someone visions, it can’t then two books later give someone the powers of a god. How magic works in a universe must be clearly understood by anyone who cares to take even a small amount of time.
GRRM, even with so many characters and different types of magic on different continents that isn’t always clear, manages to understand this where C&H don’t. He generally picks a certain area, and out of that area only a certain few that have the genes may access certain powers. Otherwise, it must usually be asked with blood magic.
Only the First Men have warging blood, but not everyone has the actual power. The genes passed through a few of the Starks (Bran, Rickon), and is more prominent in the free folk (Orwell, unnamed others, referenced as a normal part of life). NO ONE ELSE GETS IT THOUGH. Not the Lannisters, or the Baratheons, or the Targaryens (excluding Bloodraven because of his mom). ONLY those with First Men blood have the potential to access this power.
Out of all the Valyrian houses, only 40 houses were able to ride dragons. This points to the genes being fairly exclusive, they aren’t just mutating all the time to produce the genes/magic to ride dragons. Now, out of the 3 houses that fled the Doom, only one has the most prominent genes to ride dragons. If House Targaryen or another dragon-riding house ever married with the main Velaryon or Celtigar line pre/post Doom, then they also have carriers and occasional riders (Addam). BUT ONCE AGAIN, NO ONE ELSE CAN ACCESS THIS POWER. It is a power established through blood.
If that rule, after now being established in both the First Men and the Valyrians, is broken, then none of the lore makes sense and any magic can happen. There’s no way to make predictions in ASOIAF, no way to understand who gets to do what. Hereditary magic cannot be written and tossed aside for fun or random whim (looking at you Nettles. I know your ambiguity is important, but we know you’re not non-Valyrian cause that breaks the rules).
All other magic accessed, typically through R’hllor or the once of Dany’s fire magic, must be through blood or death. The sentence “only death pays for life” works for this. Dany got her fire magic by sacrificing Drogo, her son, and Mirri to the fire. Lady Stoneheart comes back, and kills the Frey men. Stannis summons a shadow monster, and kills his own brother.
GRRM UNDERSTANDS how magic must work when created. He knows it must be grounded, and he doesn’t even include that much of it to ensure it doesn’t get out of hand. Ryan Condal, however, does not.
Ryan Condal, and any other writers, throw around magic when convenient. The Iron Throne is insinuated to cut whenever someone makes a mistake in ep1. It shouldn’t say anything, because Aegon created it to be an uncomfortable seat and getting cut would be fulfilling that very purpose, but they give credence to a myth that GRRM has already implied is false.
“Cursed? It’s a throne made of swords!”
The White Stag shouldn’t mean a thing, but for some reason now it represents the rIgHtFuL ruler. Is there no such thing as a god ordained ruler for animals? Correct, but ignore that I guess.
Somehow making people experience magical hallucinations (they are magic, yes, Condal said it) is just shoved in with no explanation. How is Alys doing this, why is she doing it. Even Melisandre and Thorros of Myr had an explanation for their magic and a reason for using it.
And now in s2 ep5, the magic is just erased? It’s such a wishy washy conversation that I don’t even know. Now, it doesn’t matter if you have dragon blood? Or it must be thick? These people don’t know how genes work, so what are they saying and how would they know? The dragonseeds are already established to have the blood/genes, so what’s the point of the saying anyways for the audience? And why would bastards be recorded? There’s no reason. Everyone who married out of the family died or their children married back into the main line so they’re out too. It’s just incoherent.
Writers, you cannot be so irresponsible with magic. You must establish your rules, you must stick to them (preferably just grab GRRM’s rules). You need to be better. Even if you disagree with some of the rules or change them, MAKE SURE YOU KNOW WHAT THEY ARE.
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