#oh my god this came out so sappy | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

tailsz · 10 months

Text

Bungo Stray dogs Boyfriend headcannons!

NSFW INCLUDED‼️‼️

Includes: Atsuhi, Dazai, Kunikida, Ranpo, Akutagawa, Chuuya, Fydor, Sigma, Nikolai.

A/N: we are going to ignore the fact that i haven’t updated in a month…

ANYWAYS ILL SEE WHAT FANDOM IS NEXT 😝😝

—————————————————————————————————————

Atsuhi!🐯

Oh he was definitely panicking when he came to terms that he liked you😓

If you so much as grazed any of your body parts onto him he will actually die

AND NGL HE WOULD AVOID YOU??? you were left dumbfounded 😒

Dazai had to be the one spilling the tea that atsuhi likes you because atsuhi REFUSED to confess (Dazai thought teasing him would help. IT DID NOT HELP.)

Oh my god and when y’all start dating he’s even more on edge for like the first couple of weeks, it honestly concerned you

BUT ONCE HE CALMED DOWN

he is the whole package of ‘Perfect Boyfriend!’ 💐

he will literally break his BACK for you, he wants to make sure you’re happy for the rest of your life<3

So if you’re a fellow member of the ADA, he would like discreetly HINT to the others and the president that he wants to take as many missions w/ u as possible (it was BARELY discreet but it worked 😍‼️)

Y’all have matching PJ’S 😋( it’s a white and orange tiger onesies 🤭)

he made you one of those friendship bracelets with each-others initials (he has yours, and you have his<:)

The first time he tried to make you breakfast in bed, he dropped it all on you and the bed ☠️

(HE IS SO CLUMSY LIKE DUDE???)

he always comes to you when he feels one of his PTSD attacks coming

(you cuddle him for like 1-2 hours)

you can never guarantee your safety anywhere, but with you, he feel safe 24/7 <3

HE ABSOLUTELY LOVES BINGING SAPPY ROMANCE SHOWS WITH U. ESPECIALLY LOVE TRIANGLES

Y’all always fighting with who the main girl is gonna end 😒 HE IS MOSTLY ALWAYS RIGHT TOO

y’all split paper work up! WHICH MAKES YALL SUPER PRODUCTIVE (y’all come in second to kunikida that man does NOT play 😓)

he loves holding your wrist insted of ur hand when walking (he’s autistic idk man)

NSFW!!

Oh boy he is a submissive top😓

Like he’s always trying to pleasure you sexually or not

BUT WHAT GETS HIM HELLA TURNED ON.

is when you dominated him and order him around while he’s doing so 👏

i want to say he’s pretty vanilla BUT HE IS NOT AGAINST USING TOYS.

this one time you convinced him to wear a toy in public 🤭

it actually gave him a heart attack when anyone would talk to him bc you would turn it out and let me tell u rn. HE IS LOUD.

while nobody else noticed.. DAZAI DID .N HE NEVER LET HIM LIVE IT DOWN.

dazai always brings THAT up when atsuhi refuses to do his paperwork 😓

he likes it when you sit on his face 🤭 he doesn’t need oxygen wdym

HE LOVES REVERSE COWGIRL

MY GOD DOES HE LOVE THIGH HIGHS‼️‼️

god the moment he sees you wearing them he’s BEGGING you to let him touch n taste you 🗣️

HE LEAVES SO MANY BITE MARKS ON YOUR THIGHS 🙏🙏🙏

he is absolutely into overstimulation

he TRIES to hide his kinks but like. HE IS SUCH A CLUTS AND A BAD LIAR 🔥

his aftercare is the best ! he brings u some sweets, cleans u up, and puts on a trashy movie to watch !

HE IS A THIGH MAN ‼️

—————————————————————————————————————

DAZAI‼️❤️‍🩹

oh jesus christ okay um.

for you to enter a relationship with osamu in his ADA era. YOU WOULDVE TO HAVE KNOWN HIS SINCE HIS DARK ERA.

We all know osamu is. a womanizer so THATS PART OF THE REASON

the main reason is because you 2 are traumatized teenagers who found comfort in eachother 😓

but anyways he asked u out in the most . RANDOM-EST WAYS EVER??

HE ASKED U OUT WHEN YALL GOT INTO THE ADA 😓

he asked u out in morse code. U WERE SCARED AT FIRST BC YOU THOUGHT YALL WE’RE BEING FOLLOWED (he grabbed ur hand and squeezed out morse code to clarify)

so u asked him to repeat it again and

you just stopped walking, and in morse code asked if he was being serious HE WAS‼️‼️

honestly. YALL ARE THAT COUPLE THAT CHECK PPL OUT?? YK WHAT I MEAN

like y’all could be walking and this fine ass man walks past y’all AND YOU BOTH TURN YOUR NECK TO LOOK

YALL GET SO SILLY WHEN YOU DO

a couple should never shame the fact that people are hot 😓

ERM U GOT HIM INTO SKIN CARE

well actually he just likes it bc he makes u do it for him 😒

U GUYS PLAY FIGHT A LOT , AS IN INSULTS NOT PHYSICALLY (y’all have to calm down the office bc they think y’all r being fr 😓)

oh em gee , date nights for y’all is just. Buying like 2 bottles of whiskey or vodka and drink it ALLL in your shared apartment ‼️

U CANNOT KEEP A SECRET FROM HIM ITS SO ANNOYING

u TRIED to make him a surprise birthday party BUT NOOOOO (asshole smh 😒)

after a certain point, he lets u help him change his bandages <3 for once in his life, he can put trust in someone like this :D

… YALL LISTEN TO THE WEEKEND RELIGIOUSLY ‼️‼️‼️‼️

NSFW!!

HE IS A DOMINANT SWITCH ‼️‼️

it doesn’t matter if he’s being the top it bottom. HE IS GOING TO BE IN CHARGE NO MATTER WHAT

he is SO MEAN

oh he will 100% humiliate and mock u during the whole thing

he has. LONG AND I MEAN LONGGGG ASS FINGERS. ( he likes to finger you before fucking you 🤭🤭)

CERTIFIED ORGASM DENIER⁉️

he will deny your orgasm because he can. NO REASON WHATSOEVER HE IS A JACKASS

HE LIKES MISSIONARY . he LOVES to see your fucked out face 😓

he is very much into public sex/ teasing

this one time when he actually came into a meeting, you being the genius you are.. started to rub his dick with your shoe under the table 😍🙏

you were so smug about the fact that after the meeting you left him alone

yea you weren’t so smug when he dragged you to a bathroom and fucked your brains out 😓

HE LIKES IT WHEN U PULL HIS HAIR

he isn’t that loud little grunts here in there but. HE WILL DO IT IN YOUR EAR🙏🙏

oh he leaves SO MANY HICKEYS ON UR NECK⁉️ u don’t have enough time to cover them so u just . HAVE TO SUCK IT UP N GO TO WORK LIKE THAT☹️

yosano gave u the side eye with a wink 😚

his aftercare is kinda. shit..

U HAVE TO DO IT 😓😓 but that’s ok ig knowing him this long, it’s not that surprising (he appreciates u doing it <3)

kunikida 👨‍🏫

ERM SO YOU LIKED HIM FIRST RIGHT

But the things is , you barely met his standards in his notebook HE DIDNT TELL U THAT BUT HE WAS A LITTLE CONFLICTED ON WHAT TO DO.

so he went to dazai …… DAZAI SET YALL UP ON A DATE BC HES THE BEST WINGMAN 💪

he honestly had a wonderful time on the date and said SCREW my notebook (for the first time in his life 😓)

he can and will switch from boyfriend to parent at you ☹️

like let’s say your life isn’t rlly great

HE WILL SWITCH IT UP FOR U SO ??? EFFECTIVELY???

he lets u braid his hair SOMETIMES 😒

you asked him one time if y’all could match nail colors (not acrylics they’re not the best for the job)

YALL ROCKED THAT PRETTY OCEAN BLUE NAIL COLOR FOR A MONTH ‼️‼️ 💅

after u taught him the basics of makeup, HE LOVES DOING YOURS

(he actually got better than u… ur a little salty..)

he liked it when u give him forehead kisses :D

he shames u for watching trashy TV BUT THE SECOND HE SEES 90 day marriage he BINGES IT WITH U (i forgot the actual name)

NSFW!!

ok let’s be for real.

this man is a dominant top 🙏

like in the battle feild, he likes being in control, when your on his bed, he likes being in control

when u act like a brat insted of punishing u by fucking u in whatever way (edging or spanking)

HE WILL REFUSED TO TOUCH U

like he’ll get u all hot (and wet) JUST for him not to touch u

him being taunted by a man child at work (dazai) he very much knows how to deal with them

he likes it when u pull on his pony tail 🤭🤭

he’s not THAT kinky however he does have a red rope under his bedddddd..

HE LOVES TITS MAN LIKE 😓😓

no matter how big, he will leave so many bite marks on them 🤭

he likes bending you over a desk/bed when he fucks you 😓

he is very sweet when fucking you, showering you in praises ‼️‼️

however he can last a very LONG time so get ready for that overstimulation !!

His aftercare is pretty standard! he runs a shower for the 2 of u so y’all can be all cute and sentimental <3

HE IS A TITS GUY (duh)‼️‼️‼️

—————————————————————

Ranpo🍩 (if ykyk)

OK SO YALLS CASE IS

you fell first, but he feel harder <3

Because cmon. U cannot keep a secret from this man for the life of you😒

like he deducted that you had feelings for him

and that got him thinking, but this thinking lasted for a while so HE KEPT ON THINKING ABOUT YOU

and at some point yosano asked if he was ok , and he was like “no… i’m in LOVE??? YUCK”

you feel in love with a man child 😓😓

he confessed to u… IN THE MIDDLE OF A MURDER CASE YALL WERE WORKING ON….

NOW ONTO THE ACTUAL RELATIONSHIP

you guys are so unserious YALL ANNOY THE SHIT OUT OF EVERYONE 😓😓 (y’all know when u need to be serious tho dw !)

u guys pull daily pranks of the agency NOT ON DAZAI THAT WHORE KNOWS 😒😒

he doodles on your hand when he’s hella bored 🤭

speaking of which !

you guys have a LOT of drawing contest 😋

DAWG YALL HIT UP THE CANDY STORE LIKE EVERY FRIDAY (you’re on ur way to be diabetic 😓😓)

HE IS A BLANKET HOGGER.

not only that he moves a lot while asleep WHICH U DO TOO

It’s a gamble to see who’ll wake up on the floor 🤷🏽‍♀️

shit talking is a must EVERY time y’all go out to eat ‼️‼️

YOU GUYS HAVE MATCHING BEANIES or whatever his hat is called (it was his idea 😋) u guys r so silly

SPEAKING OF SILLY…

y’all play roblox… U GUYS BULLY N SCAM LIL KIDS 😓😓 (ONLY UR ACC GOT BANNED BTW AND NOT HIS??? u were pissed 😒)

u gotta strap him down to drink water and eat at LEAST of fruits bc oh my god???

bro does not have the most healthiest diet but yk what thats ok be REAL

NSFW!!

he’s a dominant switch leaning more to bottoming..⁉️

and we ALL know why

U NEED TO PLEASE THE GREATEST DETECTIVE IN THE WORLD DUH 🙏

he makes u please him FIRST before he even THINKS on laying a finger on you

oh but he knows what buttons to push to fluster you, get you in the mood, and how to get you even more hot and bothered 🤭

he has collar for u <3

MIRROR SEX 😓 he wants to make sure YOU see how stupid u get 💅

oh y’all 100% have sex in public, not for the thrill because he knows y’all won’t get caught

NO BECAUSE THIS GUY IS CLINGY AND NEEDY AS HELL😓

his sex drive is pretty high so YOURE IN FOR IT ALL (well he’s in you 🏃🏽‍♀️)

he is. SO. GOOD WITH HIS TOUNGE.

he eats you out like 4 times a week AND WHEN HE DOES

He can AND WILL make u come more than 1 time

HE WILL HUMILIATE U <33

100% overstimulates you by making YOU pleasure him (giving head , riding etc)

y’all split aftercare because god forbid he pampers you 😒 (he will if he knows it bothers you <33)

yall have a bath bubble bath after with rubber duckies 😋

50/50 chance yall fuck again 😓

HE IS A THIGH MAN.

Akutagawa🌑

ok so..😦

you guys met around the same time when u both got recruited by dark era dazai 😓😓

meaning well, dazai also trained you 🧍🏽‍♀️

it took him a while to trust you bc well having a horrid childhood PLUS having a very psychotic man training u in the mafia does something to u!

u would take care of each others wounds when needed too..<3

he confessed a little after dazai left the mafia

he wrote u a very straight forward note to meet up somewhere because he’s taking u out 🤗

(ik sounds hella delulu but if aku rlly does loves u, i feel like he would have a soft spot for u and would have no shame to show it to u and ONLY u :D)

y’all stargazed that night and swore to have each others back (that’s his way of saying ily <3)

onto the actual relationship!

he would absolutely rather DIE than do PDA

y’all train together and he does NOT go easy on you 😓

regardless on how he asked u out, that does not mean he changed his personality

he can and WILL be a dick to u , but that’s ok bc u fight back that’s kinda y’all’s thing 💅

you guys get up really early in the morning so, before work, y’all go to the same breakfast place every single day :D

u got along with Gin, and that was something he was hoping for u

when u guys are alone walking to a destination of a mission, we will hold ur pinkie <3

y’all talk in morse code a lot, whether y’all blink or tap ! (it’s mostly to make sure the other is ok)

it’s painfully obvious that he cannot express his feelings when he’s feeling like shit , so he does lash at you

you however, manage the situation perfectly , you do not blame him because you and him KNOW what he’s been through

however you tell him every time that u are not at fault to the reason he’s upset.

he grumbles an apology, while u smile warmly:D

as an apology he’s, a LESSER pain in the ass <3

No nsfw for aku, i HC that he is asexual !

—————————————————————

CHUUYA🎃

ok ok so 🏃🏽‍♀️

when chuuya got recruited into the mafia, you were already a subordinate to Kouyou

(you had recently joined too!)

You wielded a katana that supported your ability to the max which is why u we’re out under kouyou!

when you first lay eyes on him , you were infatuated (he is so pretty..)

though he barely trusted the mafia at the time, so it took him a while to fully trust you

and boy when he did

he never left your side<3

as you guys went up the ranks, Mori thought it would be best to have u as chuuyas right hand woman when he became executive (after dazai left anyway)

meaning.. YALL SPENT HELLA TIME TOGETHER….

he honestly was in denial about his feelings towards because the thought of another potential betrayal, especially from you?

so it took a while to confess, to the point where kouyou noticed and they had MANY talks abt it

enough to get him confidence and or reassurance

he asked u out in the most romantic way possible ‼️‼️‼️

he first of all took u out to dinner (which was a regular occurrence so u thought nothing of it)

HE PULL OUT A BIG ASS BOQUET OF FLOWERS WHILE U WERE CHEWING ON UR FOOD N ASKED 😦😦

ANYWAYS MOVING ONTO THE ACTUAL RELATIONSHIP

he is so??? fucking amazing???

his love language is buying you EXPENSIVE SHIT😨😨 (u don’t complain)

he wont do PDA bc like.. he doesn’t wants y’all business be shown to everyone

HOWEVER HE WILL BE ALLLL OVER U IF HES JELOUS ☠️ (this applies when osamu was still in the mafia, he would get hella touchy w/ u to piss chuuya off)

u make him carry u using his ability ‼️‼️

MATCHING WATCHES 🤭

y’all have arguments every now and then bc y’all have a very short temper ☠️

(y’all still apologize to eachother tho 😋 UNLESS THE FIGHT GETS YALL HELLA PETTY ☠️☠️)

every single time y’all fight and his and your subordinates witness it all ??

they all think “This again?”

u like sleeping LITERALLY on top of him HE DOESNT REALLY APPRECIATE NOT BEING ABLE TO BREATHE 😍😍

he lets u do his hair a lot 🙏🙏

SELF CARE NIGHTS R A MUST

if u don’t do it , he WILL get u into it

NSFW!!

he is a dominant switch babes..

no matter if he’s the one receiving or giving? he is the one ordering you around

he is so into BDSM

ik this is like stereotypical of him BUT.

the idea of red wine lingerie on you will make him bust on the spot.

MIRROR SEX🏃🏽‍♀️‼️

he loves calling you his little slut 😝

HAIR PULLING

and HELLA BITTING 🤯 (get it cuz he’s a vampire ha ha ha!!! /j)

contrary to popular belief, i think he’s into the risk of public sex

this. ONE. TIME. he was fingering you while yall were in a meeting..

GOD KNOWS HOW MORI DIDNT NOTICE BECAUSE IF HE DID.☠️

but you know who did? KOUYOU. she gave y’all the nastiest side eye and was left flabbergasted (HER TWO KIDS ARE DOING SUCH INDECENT SHIT???)

he absolutely loves it when you initiate the foreplay

he will ALSO make you deep throat him 😣

… gun kink..? 😞

he likes licking you ??? he’s cat i swear

THIGH MAN OH MY GOD

he CANNOT keep his hands off them..

he does the thing where he’s driving and his free hand is on your thigh

that’s like how 99.9% car sex happenes btw!

AFTER CARE 10/10

he runs you a bath

HE DRESSES YOU UP

he SETTELES YOU IN BED?

treats you like a god damn princess ‼️‼️

—————————————————————

FYDOR 🐀

erm ok so first

you gotta be a little delusional ok

because i have a feeling that if it were cannon him.. he would only be with you for his own entertainment so…

WE ARE GOING TO BE DELUSIONAL AND PRETEND THATS NOT THE CASE 😍‼️‼️

ok so…

you got recruited to the DOA by nikolai because he just found you loosing control of your ability??? (real y/n moment ‼️‼️)

he thought you were silly enough SO HE DRAGGED U ALONG

He did get a scolding by fydor for bringing a random stranger to their HQ? (what even is their building called ☠️)

he thought since you were already there… to get a good read at you and found you fascinating to say the least

He saw a TINT of innocence with.. rage?? he absolutely loved it

but then.. the more he “hung out” with you.. he started feeling this weird thing in his chest every time you popped into his mind..

he immediately knew what it is was and

he started avoiding you

because love isn’t something he needs right now

bros trying to take over the world and purify it not.. this.

the more he thought about it , his mind came up with the excuse that .. maybe your love can empower him..

AND HE BAUGHT IT

he asked you out so straight forward???

like y’all were in the middle of drinking tea and he just said “Would you like to take my hand in a relationship?”

and you spat out your tea and he did NOT repeat himself 😒

ONTO THE ACTUAL BF HC…

just because he loves and would set the world on fire for you… he still has high standards for you as a member of the DOA

he also likes to challenge you intellectually so you could (not rlly BUT STILL) keep up with him!

it actually has helped you tho!

you guys have this little tradition of writting silly poems for eachother

it’s impossible to trick this man so.. you make him look for YOUR poems 😋 (the effort is there!)

he actually knows how to do makeup so he does yours on a regular basis! (it’s like between a casual goth look)

if you don’t have the same beliefs as him, he still appreciates the thought of you helping and supporting him

in one of his battles with the ADA, you were his trump card, dazai was left flabbergasted tbh

though he’s not high maintenance, he loves LOVES holding ur hand :D

y’all own a black kitty his name is Nova!

HES THE BEST CUDDLIER

oh my god he cannot stand when you give someone else attention

like he won’t say it outloud but like..

it lowkey pisses him off when you do

he can be a peace of shit to you

the thing that he likes tho is that u don’t let him walk over you ‼️

NSFW!!

2 words.

Dominant

bottom (maybe he’ll top u like once a month..)

HE AN ANEMIC MAN HE BARELY HAS THE ENERGY TO SURVIVE THE DAY.

but oh boy his personality…

erm! reverse cowgirl is his go to position..

HE MAKES U SUCK HIM OFF BEFORE ANYTHING THO..

honestly you have no problem with this

the sight of him whimpering under your touch MY GODDD 😝😝

he will absolutely never outright admit that you make him feel good 😒

THE ONCE IN A LIFETIMES WHERE HE TOPS YOU

it’s wild.

he doesn’t need to go rough on you because he has your body memorized like the back of his hand

he KNOWS what spots to abuse 😓

i honestly think he’s a tit guy

he knows that he loves the thought of you fucking him up BUT HE WANTS U TO TAKE INITIATIVE🤨

pick up context clues babes

his aftercare is actually pretty great but it doesn’t invole you getting out of bed just tons of cuddles and praises <3

—————————————————————

Nikolai 🤡

he would 100% prefer a high-maintenance partner to keep up with his silly doings yk?

so in this case.. sigma “recruited” you to the DOA (with fydors approval in advance)

YALL WERE IN SYNC ASAP⁉️⁉️

you guys play pranks on everyone except fydor bc he SUCKS smh…😒

HE JUMPSCARES U A LOT WITH HIS COAT☠️

at the start of y’all’s friendship he said “oh who said a guy and a girl can’t be the best of buds and nothing more!”

well..! that didn’t age well

y’all are the “You fell first but he feel harder”

i would like to say niko was oblivious to your feelings because everything you guys do are jokes…

he never thought anything you 2 did was serious

so.. apologies for the delay!

honestly it was fydor who told him

though he does not care of y’all’s love life.. niko was pushing his buttons that day and Fedya thought that was the best way to shut him up

and it worked

he was a lil flabbergasted 😦

when he REALLLYYY thought about it… he enjoyed the thought of you 2 being something more..

SO HE ASKED YOU OUT IN THE MOST NIKOLAI WAY :D

he gave you 2 bouquets of flowers 💐!!

though one was poisoned and you had to figure out which one wasn’t by a time limit… (YOU GOT IT LIKE A MINUTE BEFORE THO‼️)

and then he confessed and y’all lived happily ever after :D

…..

the day that fedya told niko that you liked him.. WAS THE REASON WHY FEDYA WANTS TO KHS.

if he thought that the 2 of u were annoying before?

JESUS CHRIST MULTIPLY IT BY 10☠️

he cannot go a day without physically holding you

whether it’s your hand , arm , leg thighs anything (he’s touch starved)

MATCHING OUTFITS R A MUST

he whines to fydor when he doesn’t pair y’all up for a mission

while fedya and dazai were in prison yall procrastinated on your current mission… YALL GOT IT DONE LAST MINUTE THO😓😓

Dawg leaves you no room in the bed he spreads out to much AND he’s a blanket hogger🤨

neither of you can cook

SO U MAKE SIGMA COOK FOR YOU😍‼️‼️

very rarely gets emotional with you, but when he does?

those are the moments you 2 are thankful you found eachother <3

NSFW!!

he’s very high maintenance so…

he’s a dominant top ‼️

public sex is something the 2 of you do on a daily basis

very VERY high sex drive

y’all’s first time you told him to go slow because you’ve never done anything like this b4 and he did..!

the second you told him to go a little faster..

DAWG HE WENT ALL OUT (at the time it lowkey hurt BUT I FELT SO GOOD??)

fedya gives y’all the nastiest look when y’all come out of the bathroom…

he loves sending you videos of his print 👏👏👏

he knows you love his hands so he fingers you a lot

speaking of which.. HE EDGES YOU ALOT

he does it for no reason what so ever like at all..

he thinks it’s funny ☹️

HE LIKES IT WHEN YOU ACT LIKE A BRAT 😍‼️‼️

like sex is a silly game between y’all

(he knows it’s game you can’t win)

honestly he has a size kink 🤷🏽‍♀️

AND AND wax play‼️‼️

he likes teasing you and then just leaving u alone for the rest of the day 😒😒

HE LOVES GRIPPING YOUR WAIST WHILE FUCKING U FROM BEHIND

erm his aftercare is average he cleans you up and bring you water and y’all fall asleep pretty quickly

honestly i think he’s a tit guy!

—————————————————————

SIGMA 🎶

erm ok so nikolai also recruited u here! (im so original!!)

for starters he already liked you sense of fashion

like a victorian era type 😜

he noticed how you always had your headphones in.. but when he talked to you.. you took them off

maybe he was reading too much into it but it made his heart flutter

you spent most of your time in his casino, so you give had tons of time to bond

he honestly enjoyed the times where you’d share headphones (he LOVESS your playlist)

honestly niko kept teasing him abt you and no matter how many times he tried to confess he couldn’t

well face to face anyway.. he wrote u a cute silly poem >w•

both of y’all’s love language is quality time

honestly fydor doesn’t exactly hate y’all together so that’s something!

late night walks is a daily routine yall do almost every day

he loves doing your makeup AND hair ‼️‼️‼️🫶

yall do eachothers nails all the time😋

OO EVERY FRIDAY IS A MOVIE NIGHT

every other day y’all go to this little coffee shop in the morning b4 dealing with a chaotic day

you are a night owl while she’s an early morning person

y’all take baths together all the time <33

y’all have the ENTIRE lego flower collection ‼️‼️

that’s literally the main reason nikolai is not allowed NEAR your shared appointment 😓😓

NSFW!!

cmon..

this man. WITH HIS SLUTTY WAIST.

is a submissive bottom 🤷🏽‍♀️

originally he thought “ofc im going to take the role of being on top because-“

the moment you practically pinned him .. you awoken something in him😨

HE LOVES LOVES LOVESSS being dominated so bad it’s concerning

he doesn’t HATE it when you take things slow.. but jesus christ when you go rough on him?

he nuts in the spot 🤷🏽‍♀️

he likes it when you pull on his hair ‼️

he’s into BDSM (it’s always the quiet ones)

he has a smile sex drive so honestly it’s up to you! he doesn’t mind tbh 🗣️

he loves it when you play music while y’all have sex 🎶🎶

erm nikolai can’t KNOCK A FUCKING DOOR SO HE JUST WALKED INTO YOUR HOME AND SAW YOU RIDING SIGMA.

he never ever let him live it down

this one time you made him wear a toy on his dick and though he will deny it..

it was one of the best days of his ENTIRE LIFE🤭🤭

he also likes the excitement of being blindfolded

his favorite place to have sex in is the living room IDK WHY🤨

mostly it’s you doing the aftercare which he rates a 5 stars! 🫶🫶

———————————

OKAY THATS IT!! again ik it’s been a month.. ILL TRY TO POST MORE FREQUENT!

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amourrs · 6 months

Note

so there’s this absolutely filthy thought that’s stuck in my head of miguel with standing missionary… oh to be fucked in the air like a doll… what can i say i love my men big n strong.

thanks for your request lovey!! — one where you and your boyfriend have a quickie in a public bathroom (established relationship, smut 18+, 0.8k)

Your back is pressed to the wall, hands scraping for purchase against it and coming up empty as your legs squeeze firmly around your boyfriend’s thighs. This is kind of disgusting, you think fleetingly, your head turning towards the closed toilet half a foot to your right. You quickly decide not to care about hygiene, though, not with six feet and nine inches of muscle and sex appeal hard and willing in front of you.

“Cariño,” Miguel pants into your mouth, hands coming up to circle your waist. You’re forced to turn back to him as your eyes begin to flutter closed. “Nuh uh- eyes open, honey. Gotta keep your attention on me or I’m gonna get jealous of a toilet and we can’t give Morales that kind of ammunition against me, not when he caught me stroking that cat last week.”

Your eyes snap open at once. “That cat has a name, Miguel, and it’s Monty—” A gasp cuts you off and it takes you a second to realise that it came from your own throat. Miguel’s hips snap into yours a second time as a smug smile saunters across his lips, twisting them into a condescending expression.

“Yeah, yeah. Don’t give a fuck what the cat was called, sweetheart. How could I when I have you right here? Fuck, you’re dripping for me, angel, gonna feel so good when you cum around my cock,” he groans, hands sliding down to cup your thighs as he massages them in his grip. Heat rises to your face and you promptly bury yourself in his neck, peppering kisses to the junction where it meets his jawline as he chuckles at you. “Don’t get all shy on me now, corazón. Actin’ like this wasn’t your idea in the first place,” Miguel teases, his voice cracking slightly as his cock drags against your velvety walls and you let out a broken moan.

“Shut up,” you whine, head still firmly planted against your boyfriend’s hot skin. “Didn’t— fuck— ask, did I?”

Something about the pettiness of your statement is far harder to take seriously when Miguel has your legs shaking around him and so he decides to let it slide, opting to laugh at you rather than torturing you further. “Okay, okay, mi— shit, squeezin’ me so tight. You close, honey? Gonna cum for me? God, please cum for me, you look so pretty when you do—” It’s not long before the huge man’s babbling has your head tilting back to hit the wall of the stall as your cunt clenches around him, your orgasm washing over you as Miguel’s thumb comes up to brush against your clit. You jolt slightly at the stimulation, whining at the slight pain that’s beginning to creep in as Miguel’s thrusts speed up. He’s pounding into you with no reprieve now, arm up above you as he clutches at the top of the stall’s wall to steady himself. “I know, mi vida, I know. I’m sorry, I’m so close, I swear— fuck— taking me so well, cariño, I’m gonna— shit”, he swears, pulling out at the last moment so that he can paint your thigh with his release. It’s so hot when his head slides back to moan as he cums and you have to resist the urge to bite him, instead deciding to whine as you turn on shaky legs to sit on top of the closed lid of the toilet. Miguel turns to you a second later, pulling toilet roll out of the dispenser to his left as he leans over and begins to clean himself off of the soft skin of your thigh, leaving a sweet kiss behind on the spot as he does so.

“So,” he starts as soon as you’re both fully dressed again, your breath finally beginning to return to your lungs. He’s bending down to retie your shoelace for you as he squares his shoulders and looks up into your eyes, an expression of pure, unadulterated (and rather sappy) love evident on his face. “I have a really important question to ask you, and it’s been on my mind for so long—”

You roll your eyes at him, incredulous. “Miguel O’Hara, I swear to God. If you dare propose to me in a public bathroom—”

Your boyfriend’s eyes widen in mock surprise and he rises to his feet. “Propose? To you? In a bathroom?! Mi vida, what are you on about? Clearly I was about to ask if you wanted falafel or sushi for dinner,” he rebukes, barely holding in a peal of laughter as it shakes his broadened shoulders.

“Oh, fuck off, O’Hara. Obviously I want sushi.”

Miguel grins at your irritated expression before leaning down to smear an affectionate kiss across your forehead. “Sushi it is then, cariño.”

#ask #pxgeturner #atsv #miguel o'hara #miguel o’hara smut #across the spiderverse #miguel o’hara x reader #across the spiderverse blurb #miguel o’hara blurb #miguel o’hara drabble #miguel o’hara x you #miguel o’hara x fem!reader #atsv movie #miguelohara

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bahrtofane · 3 months

Text

husband Jude headcannons

jude just really really enjoys married life

Word count - 2.3K+

Watch it - i got carried away sorry guys, proposal lore?? insanely sappy, even by my standards

—--

He's not a fan of you being known as his, rather he's your husband. Always correcting people during interviews and giving you the spotlight. Even when you shy away, not knowing where to look or what to say. He's always there, a gentle hand on your knee rubbing circles as he nods for you to continue.

Every red carpet he wants to match, doesn’t care how big or small the event is. Gotta be a way you two look look a pair

His fav is when you wear exactly the same thing so there’s no way to confuse anything for what it really is hehe

Bouncing around while you get ready together, helping you get your shoes on while he tries his best to stand still while you fix his tie

“Look okay?” he asks, head tilted

You rub his arm, “you look great.”

And he smiles wide, giving you pecks all over while you giggle, trying to shoo him away from you and closer to the door. your ride is waiting, but he doesn’t care. pouting for just one more kiss. please ?

All his socials turn into your personal fan page, a big fat married in every bio, ring and all

He has more posts about you then his actual job

His teammates poke fun at it, “when are you gonna post us huh?”

He just rolls his eyes,”when I marry you i’ll think about it”

And that’s that

You're the first he runs to post a match, greeting you with the silly hand shake you perfected years ago. You think you could do it in your sleep at this rate. You came up with it ages ago when you kissed him after practice, playing with his fingers till he came up with the idea, and you with the actual hand shake.

You're his biggest supporter, and him likewise. In every and anything you do, give him pompoms and he'd be your personal cheerleader at this point.

He just likes to have you at games. Waving obnoxiously while you tell him to pose. And he does, every time, sending hearts your way. He dedicates his goals your way. The kisses he would send the crowd in his youth now only go your way where you catch them like a teenager.

You see complications of it everywhere, he thinks it's endearing. He makes you watch them together on the living room tv while you grimace

“My face looks so weird there, oh my god.”

He flicks your arm, “you look great shush. Ha that was during el clasico, ah good times.”

You roll your eyes but snuggle up against him anyway.

One of your favorite past times btw, nothing he loves better than a lazy morning in with you in his arms while he hits snooze on every alarm.

He tries to cook, with his stupid kiss the chef apron he got just for you. but he will need help, which you gladly give. You end up eating on the couch, covered in pillows watching cheesy shows. You've watched keeping up with the kardashians too many times to count and he still laughs out loud every time.

Jude is soft and sweet when he's not forced into a picture perfect smile and self 24/7. He's a silly guy, always trying to make you laugh. Teasing is his love language by the way.

But he's still sweet, leaving notes around your house for you to find when he has to leave for away games. Hearts and smiley faces littering every inch of the paper. Some frowny faces when he knows he'll miss you extra.

He likes bringing you to family events and bragging about how cool you are, but everyone already loves you as is, he just likes to brag. Look at how cool the love of my life is everyone, I am sooo lucky you guys look look.

Jobe has rolled his eyes far too many times, but he's happy to see his brother so happy. Plus you guys threw a fantastic wedding. A win is a win.

When you can't be there he facetimes you every second he possibly can. Blowing kisses when he has to go.

“Judes been complaining all day I hope you know,” Aurélien pops his head into the screen.

You snort, “ hello to you too Aurélien.”

He gives you a wave before ruffling the top of Judes hair as he pouts, fixing it just how he likes again, “they just don't get it,” he sighs dramatically.

You laugh, “sure baby, sure.”

You make sure to keep up with the match the best you can, texting him live reactions, even if you know he won't see them till later. He likes them all the same.

Your name on his phone is a simple "mine" with a bunch of heart emojis, the contact pic is one of the two of you together on vacation, smiling with your faces squished together while laying in the sand

It makes him smile every time. he thinks you’re the cutest

He's a big fan of nicknames, weather its a version of your first name, or just a good ole fashion baby. He rarely uses your actual name. He called you something so insane like pooki bear in public once and you have yet to let him live it down.

"in a restaurant was crazy," you squint at him.

He only giggles, "but it was soo funny baby come on."

Speaking of restaurants, this guy loves a good date night

Gigdy as he comes down the hall in his pjs, grinning while showing you the new reservations, it’s your fav place !

Every anniversary he somehow finds a way to outdo himself, don't ask, because in truth he doesn't even know how he pulls it off, but anything for you. Anything.

Even if it means hunting down the stuffed animal you had as a kid and couldn't find after you lost it in your couch cushions. He finds it, after months and months of searching, making Jobe help him look, it comes in the mail and he has to get creative to get you out of the house and away from the mail the day it's supposed to come.

It gets neatly wrapped and placed on your shared bed the morning of, surrounded by a collection of other gifts, your favorite flowers, and a cheesy note that you always end up crying at.

The look on your face makes it all worth it, when you tackle him in a bone crushing hug, tumbling into the covers in a tangle of legs while you laugh in between sniffles, he loves you. Oh how he loves you

It's been a tradition to end the night with the very place he proposed, his home, now yours.

He doesnt think he could forget it even if he tried. It was a whirlwind of a day. Picture this:

He's lost all his black socks, his (and your) favorite body wash just spilled all over the shower, his hair looks awful ( he got a haircut that morning), his cologne isn't where he left it, and the private chef he hired isnt replying. All while you're not even awake yet.

He calls his mom because what else are you supposed to do when you're set to propose and everything is going wrong.

She only chuckles softly over the phone, “calm down jude, just breathe. You'll find your things, just take a breather and come back to things with a clear head okay?”

So he does. Sitting on his bed, towel still on, frowning. He chooses to instead pat himself dry, get dressed, and give himself a pep talk in the floor length mirror at the corner of his room.

Turns out his mom was right, things fix themself for the most part, his socks are stuck at the bottom of the dryer, his hair isn't as bad as he thought, he finds a better cologne in his collection, and a perfect body cream. It's gonna be a good day.

He finishes the last of the day of prep, getting fancy candles, a lighter, and greeting the decorator. Yes he hired a decorator.

It's nothing over the top, just little changes to make his home look a little softer, changing out the curtains, placing lace table cloth with details in your favorite color. The main event is his second living room that gets covered in an arch of your favorite flowers, gentle curling to just kiss the top of the new antique chandelier that will be holding the fancy candles too. He hopes you like it. He really really hopes you like it.

He's had this planned for ages, since the moment he first met you he thinks.

When you greet him with a silly good morning text he only grows oh so fond of you, excited to see you. He told you it was a fancy dinner at his place. A change of pace from the resurates. Both of you prefer a much more intimate night in then cameras shoved into your face while a hundred people all yell a hundred things while you're trying to chew your food.

So you get ready, dress up and make it for dinner. When you see the familiar face of the chef, Karlos, you give him a wave and get seated. Noticing the new table cloth but you don't say anything. You don't want to be wrong so early into the night.

Jude comes in, nervous as a school boy as he takes your hand for a quick peek, running around like a maniac back and forth. He looks nice, in a signature all black suit, and smelling amazing per usual.

Dinner is amazing, full of your favorite courses and Jude is jittery in his seat.

“You okay?”

He nods, a little too fast, “oh yeah. I am. Don't worry.”

You raise a brow but dont push, thanking Karlos for the amazing meal as he cleans up and heads out for the night.

Jude gets up, telling you to stay put while he'll be righttt back. Don't worry, remember!

He comes back, unable to meet your eyes while he gives you his hand. You take it, sliding out of your seat and following him down the hall. There's flower petals on the floor now, you look at him, but he looks anywhere but at you, chewing his cheek.

He leads you to the second living room, where the furniture has been cleared out. Replaced by a walkway of flowers and candles, leading up to where an arch of your favorite flowers hugs the curtain, new ones.

Gently pulled back to reveal the floor to ceiling windows that give way to his yard. And the most gorgeous sunset you have ever seen. A chandelier hangs above you, decorated with more flowers, and the most ornate candles and bulbs you have ever seen.

Your eyes begin to water before he even gets down on one knee, his lip wobbles, holding your hand the whole time as he confesses every little moment and reason for his love.

He loves you, he adores you. You're- youre everything. Truly and fully. You're the sunlight that kisses his skin, the stars he wishes to touch, to know, he yearns for you. Years to know you in your entirety, till he knows nothing else but you. For your name to only fully know his lips, for only he will fully know you. He sees no other, he knows no other. He wants- no needs, to give himself as he is.

You see him, see him as more than just Jude Belingham. You see what others can not, will not. You see him, you know him. You know him better than he knows himself most days. You've seen all there is to see, all that makes him who he is. You know his stupid sandwich order at the place you hate but keep going to because you know how much he loves it.

You sit in freezing weather for the full game just to make sure you don't miss a second of him. The first to congratulate him, the first to mourn with him, the first to sooth his aches and pains. You're the face he looks for in a crowd, you're the first person he calls when anything happens.

And you love him with such ferocity it amazes him.

You're full crying at this point, fat tears rolling down your cheeks till you can barely see him, and he finally gets down on one knee, fishing out a small velvet box from his inner pocket, opening it with shaky hands.

And he whispers, “will you marry me?”

You fall next to him, sobbing into his shoulder while you repeat yes over and over. He cries with you, till you're both laughing from pure joy.

Who better to spend the rest of your life with then the man who loves you so?

Telling his family is the best part. You have them over for what was supposed to be a quick lunch, turned dinner, and you break the news at dessert, showing off your ring while they all gasp.

They pile you into the biggest hug, smiles so wide they hurt and you laugh, you're going to get married! You think they just might be more excited than you are.

Wedding planning comes and goes both so fast and so slow. Youre so excited you can't wait, and yet every step of the way seems like it takes excruciatingly long.

Your wedding planner tries her best, bless her soul, but you want it to be completely and utterly perfect. Down to the types of chairs at the venue.

Jude lets you have your way for the most part, chiming in now and again, he trusts you fully. Knowing you're going to make it the best regardless.

Leading up to the big day you think you just might pass out from stress and never be seen again, but the almost year of planning pays off, and you're married!

The honeymoon is spent traveling all over while jude is wide-eyed, unable to believe he's married to you of all people.

The press catches on soon after, even if your wedding was small and intimate. News comes out one way or another.

Jude only responds with a picture of you two slow dancing among your family and friends, captioned, “all you need to know.” and he pins it to every social media page.

What a man huh?

#jude x reader #jude bellingham #jude x you #jude fluff #jude bellingham x reader #jude bellingham x you #jude x y/n #jude bellingham one shot #jude bellingham imagine #jude bellingham fanfic #jude bellingham fluff #football fanfic #bahr footy #footy fic #footballer fic

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st7rnsangels · 25 days

Text

— rumours put to rest. chris sturniolo | versus tour

sypnosis. with all the girls flirting and complimenting with y/n’s famous boyfriend, chris sturniolo, she begins to feel self conscious of if she actually deserves this mini-celebrity she caught herself, especially with their relationship being a secret. bf!chris realized this and decided to put the rumours to rest once and for all.

warnings. flangst? self-consciousness, crying / comfort, fem!reader, that’s really all.

a/n. not sure where this inspiration came from but i’m feeling sappy today. also first post!!!!! like and reblog to support your favourite writers<3333

“ the need to be the best before the need to rest .. “

this was it; the versus tour was finally here, and my boyfriend was going on stage in front of hundreds of people.

a lot of girls found him attractive, that i knew was inevitable. but i could never get rid of this sickly feeling.

while he was out there, being admired by all these pre-teen girls, i was sat inside the trailer watching through a live-camera.

i wanted to be out there. i wanted to be the one admiring him.. he is my boyfriend of six months, after all.

and don’t get me wrong — chris is an amazing boyfriend, and i couldn’t have asked for a better soulmate to be paired with, but i was sick of being a secret.

i knew staying secret was the better choice, both for him and for me. i didn’t like the spotlight, and i didn’t want to deal with the rude comments by jealous girls, and he simply wasn’t ready to reveal our relationship yet.

i understood it, all of it.

yet, i couldn’t help but feel horrible about the situation i put myself in.

i watched as the girl brought on stage to be on his team was a little overly touchy, grabbing his arm, talking to him.

it was all in good-heart, i knew that, yet.. i still felt that twinge of my heart at every touch or glance or words spoken between them, telling me that it should be me on that stage making him laugh under his breath.

it hurt. my heart hurt from the guilt and sadness of being remained a secret, and i didn’t like it. at all.

i quickly wiped the tear from my cheek as i tried to remain positive seeing my boyfriend happy, and smiling, but it was hard with the constant flow of tears from my eyes that just didn’t seem to stop.

shit. why am i crying?

a voice is spoken from my phone, “alright, guys, we have to get going, but thank you so much for coming, it was a blast tonight!” nick said in the mic, turning to his brothers to signify it was time to go.

“awwww!” the crowd erupts.

“thank you guys!” matt’s distant voice says to the mic as he grabs his jacket and moves toward the exit.

chris waves goodbye to his parter that was brought onto the stage, giving her a quick smile and waving to the crowd as he followed his brother.

fuck. why did that hurt so bad? it shouldn’t, really.

i shut my phone off, tossing it across the tiny tour bed, and curled into myself. i brushed my tears away, running fingers through my hair.

it was all lighthearted, that’s what i should be thinking.

but the girl he was with was so beautiful. the kind of beautiful that makes your breath stop and your head feel dizzy.

looking at myself in the mirror across from the bed, i sigh.

chris should be with that kind of girl: effortlessly pretty, good smile, bubbly personality.. yet, i was the opposite. he clicked with her, because that was his match — the same loudness, eagerness, excitement and energy, she should be his type of match.

before i can spiral into my thoughts any longer, the door to the tour bus opens.

“oh my god, i’m spent.” nick huffs, placing his wallet and phone on the small table and falling against the couch.

“tell me about it, all day travelling and then a three hour show? i’m exhausted.” matt says, dropping his keys and jacket against the kitchen counter.

realizing they had already made their way to the bus, i quickly wipe my tears.

“hey, y/n.” nick waves, and i peek my head out, flashing the best smile i could.

“hi, nick.” i say back, huffing at the small croack in my voice.

and then, there was chris.

i watch as he walks over to me, smile on his face as he grabs my cheeks and kisses my forehead. “hi, baby.” he says, pulling away to look at my face.

and when his eyes land on my puffy eyes, tear stained cheeks, his brows furrow.

“are you.. okay?” he whispers, quickly glancing to nick and matt who shrug their shoulders. he lets go of my face, tucking a piece of hair behind my ear.

“yeah, um, i’m — i’m fine.” i sniff, wiping my tears, “just missing home.”

his eyes run over my face, almost as if inspecting me.

he leans closer, whispering. “do you wanna go outside? so we can talk.”

i glance toward nick and matt, pretending not to be listening, yet they were horrible at hiding their curiosity.

looking back to chris, i nod. he gives me a smile, lending out his hand which i take. the warmth of his hand seeps into my palm, giving me almost instant comfort he seems to always be able to give me.

he leads me toward the door, making a silent, quick gesture and muttering for matt to move his ass, which he does.

and as soon as that door opens, and i take a step outside, i feel instantly calmed down. i realized now that i had spent basically the last twelve hours inside that trailer.

chris squeezes my hand as we walk down the road, listening to the soft sounds of the forest and buzzing streets of the city ahead of us.

and as we found a place against a wall, he sighs and stops, leaning against it.

“so.. what’s wrong?” he says, letting go of my hand, wiping a small tear that i hadn’t realized ran down my cheek.

“i dunno, i just —.. i think i’m overreacting, it’s nothing to really—“

“baby.” chris cuts my off, resting a hand on my cheek, “it’s just me,” he tucks my hair behind my ear, “talk to me.”

i bite my lip. ponder his words.

“that girl you were partnered with today on stage?” i offer.

“what about her?” he asks.

“it’s just.. i dunno.” i look to my hands, picking at my nails, “she was so beautiful. and funny, and outgoing..”

his brows furrow, “where are you going with this?”

my teeth sink back into my lip, “do you ever.. think about how different our lives are?

“i mean, i’m this college student, becoming a teacher, and you’re a celebrity.” i shrug my shoulders, “do you ever think about being with.. with someone more compatible?”

“wait, just—“

“that girl in there, she was just like you.” i chuckle, before sniffing, “loud, funny, all bubbly and smiley like that..”

“y/n—“

“and i’m just.. some book nerd.”

“Y/N.” chris says, placing two hands on my shoulders. “please, let me talk.

my lips form a tight line, my throat aching from a sob wanting to come from my throat.

“i love you.” he says in a breathy tone, “only you. i don’t care about how different our lives are; you’re the only girl i want.”

“you.. you love me?” i whisper.

a smile forms on his lips as he brushes a thumb across my cheek.

“of course i do, dummy.” he says, pulling me closer by a hand on my back clothed by his hoodie — his favourite hoodie.

“now, can you stop crying so i can kiss you?” he says, licking his lips, “‘been thinking about you the whole show.”

i giggle. “you’re such a loser.”

“only for you, baby.”

#chris sturniolo #sturniolo triplets x reader #sturniolo triplets #chris x reader #chris sturniolo x reader

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wholoveseggs · 4 months

Note

Hey, just an idea that would work really well, I think. Can you do a smut with a horribly jealous Elijah? They have a casual affair going because she has severe intimacy issues, but Elijah is deeply in love and needs her to realize that?

Strings

18+ ---- {Masterlist} {Tag-List}

You've denied what your heart wants for so long and Elijah is tired of waiting.

♡♡ Thanks for the request, I may have gotten a little carried away with this one ♡♡

6.2k words - Warnings: smut, lots of drinking / drunkenness, men being gross, white knight Elijah, dom!elijah (as dom as I can write it, I'm just a sappy romantic), rough(ish) sex, rim job (f!receiving), blood drinking, biting & hangovers.

{Moodboard->}

It was annoying, really, how good Elijah was in bed. You never thought you would be the kind of girl who would lose your mind over a simple touch, but you couldn't get enough. You had never felt this way, even after months of sex, and it was maddening.

You had started sleeping together on a whim, one night of drinking leading to a night of fun. It was just meant to be a one-time thing, but it became more frequent, and then more, until you found yourself spending more time with him than alone.

‘No strings attached’ you had said when you first started sleeping together, but as time went on, Elijah was getting more and more attached and so were you.

When you were underneath him, clinging to his strong shoulders, panting and moaning as he completely unraveled you, it was easy to forget that it was supposed to be casual. But then his gaze would lock onto yours, those dark intense eyes with so much love pouring out of them and you couldn't stand it.

You would close your eyes and look away, your heart beating so hard you thought it would explode. He would always pause for a second, then keep going.

This wasn't supposed to happen, this wasn't the deal, and you wanted him to stop, but at the same time you didn't. The look he gave you frightened you, it was like he was seeing inside your soul, seeing all the parts of you that you tried so hard to keep secret.

Elijah had never hidden the fact that he wanted more from you, but he had respected your boundaries. He hid how much it hurt him when you told him that you didn't want more, and you knew that, yet he kept going, because he couldn't stay away from you.

He would give you anything you asked for, and he would take anything you gave him, and he would never tell you that he was unhappy.

He was always so good to you.

Until you started seeing other people.

And then he wasn't so good.

Elijah heard the click of your boots before you even entered the compound. He'd been listening for them all morning, his ears trained to the sound, his heart lifting every time a woman with the right footfall walked in. Only when he'd heard you arrive would he relax his shoulders, his mind no longer consumed with the idea of you and another man together.

It was a new torture. Before, he had just wanted you. Now, he had you, and he knew that someone else was touching you, and that someone wasn't him.

"Beks! Beks! Oh my God, what a night!" You came bounding through the courtyard, you had a coffee in one hand and a fresh bouquet of flowers in the other. Still in the same clothes you left in last night, the only change was your makeup smudged, your hair a little messy.

Elijah watched you from the balcony above. You hadn't seen him yet. You were too busy gushing to Rebekah, who had been waiting eagerly for your return.

"What happened? I lost you after we did those shots with Klaus." Rebekah asked, taking the flowers and looking you over.

"Okay, you know that hot guy who was flirting with me at the bar? Well I went to some house party with him and a few of his friends," You said, sitting down next to Rebekah and taking a long sip of coffee. "So we were all drinking, and then we did some shots, and then a couple of lines, and then one thing led to another..."

You trailed off, grinning at her. She gave you a look, gesturing for you to go on.

Elijah tried his best not to listen, but he could help himself. He had never been able to resist the sound of your voice.

"So what happened?" She asked.

"Well, we ended up in the kitchen and he was fucking me against the counter," You said with a giggle.

"Was he any good?"

"Not really," You replied, taking a big gulp of coffee and rolling your eyes. "But the kitchen was real fancy, and there was a maid who saw us."

Rebekah laughed, shaking her head.

"That is classic, darling," She said, handing you back the flowers.

"Yeah, and then when I was on my way out in the morning I stole these right out of a vase," You said proudly, putting them down on the table next to you.

The sound of your giggles floated up to him. It was utterly infuriating, and at the same time, it was like a balm to his soul.

Elijah had never felt this way before.

Pure, untamed, jealousy.

He knew he shouldn't care, he knew he should be happy for you, but he couldn't stop thinking about you with other men. He couldn't stop wondering what it was like, what they were like. What did they say to you, did they make you laugh, did they touch you the way he did?

Did you want them, the way you wanted him?

And most importantly, why wasn't he enough?

"So are you going to see him again? Did he get your number?" Rebekah asked, breaking Elijah out of his dark thoughts.

"No, and yes. He wanted to go out again tonight," You replied.

"Are you going to say yes?"

"Maybe," You said, shrugging. "I'd prefer to go out with you guys, though. Maybe we could get Kol to come along."

"That would be lovely, maybe we could even convince Elijah to join," Rebekah said, smiling mischievously.

Elijah perked up at this and decided to make his presence known. He descended the stairs, trying to appear nonchalant, his usual charming self.

"Good morning, ladies," He said, his eyes fixed on you. You turned and smiled, and it made his heart skip a beat.

"Hey," You replied, grinning.

"We were just talking about going out tonight," Rebekah said, glancing between you.

"Oh? Where are you going?" Elijah asked.

"Not sure yet, wherever Beks wants," You replied. "But we were thinking that we could all go, you included."

Elijah tried not to react. He didn't want to go anywhere, not if you were going to bring one of your...paramours.

"Maybe," He said, keeping his tone light.

"Aw, come on, please?" You begged, flashing him those big, pretty eyes and batting your eyelashes.

"Yes, come with us," Rebekah joined in.

Elijah knew he would cave, like always. He couldn't say no to you, not when you looked at him like that.

"Fine," He agreed, and Rebekah and you cheered.

"It'll be fun, I promise," You said, and Elijah hoped so. He didn't think he could take much more of this.

Elijah found himself in the back of a car with his siblings. He had tried to stay home, to come up with an excuse, but Rebekah had dragged him out the door and into the car, saying that she didn't want him to sit at home and brood all night.

You were sitting in the passenger seat, talking animatedly to Rebekah. Klaus was driving, and Kol was on the phone with Davina, telling her all about the plans for the night.

"I can't believe we managed to get you out of the house without you wearing a suit," you teased, admiring his outfit. He had opted for a white shirt and black pants, his sleeves rolled up and his collar unbuttoned. He looked ridiculously good.

"I can dress casually, when I want to," He said, a slight smile playing on his lips.

"Maybe when you are going to bed," You replied, winking. He raised his eyebrows and smirked, the sight of it sending a rush of heat to your core.

"I'd be happy to show you, if you would like," He said, his voice deep and sexy.

The rest of the Mikaelsons didn't know about the affair you and Elijah were having. It was meant to be casual, you didn't want anything serious, and so the two of you were keeping it a secret. But they definitely suspected something was up, considering the flirting, the longing looks, and the time Klaus saw Elijah sneaking out of your room.

"Maybe later, if you're lucky," You shot back, giving him a wink.

He chuckled and shook his head, trying not to grin like an idiot. He was failing.

"Don't mind me, I'll just sit here and pretend I can't hear any of this," Kol interjected, looking up from his phone.

"Hush, brother," Elijah said, and Kol made a face, returning his attention to Davina.

You continued talking to Rebekah and Kol, trying to ignore the heat of Elijah's gaze on you.

When you arrived at the club, Kol immediately disappeared to go find Davina and Klaus was swarmed by women within seconds of entering the place.

You and Rebekah got drinks, and Elijah stayed close, trying not to stare at the way you moved your hips, the way your skin glowed in the dark, the way the tight dress you wore clung to your curves.

"Dance with me," You said, turning and holding out a hand. Elijah hesitated, his eyes roaming your body.

"I don't dance," He said.

"Liar," You accused, grabbing his hand and pulling him towards the crowd. He followed, letting you lead him.

Once you reached the dance floor, you started moving to the beat. Your hands rested on his chest, his arms wrapping around you, the two of you moving together. The way you felt around him was indescribable, and you never wanted to leave his embrace.

The music was loud, and the people were packed together. He could feel the warmth of your body, the softness of your skin, the way your breath hitched when he pulled you closer.

You leaned in close, your lips brushing against his ear, and he inhaled sharply.

"Come on, Elijah, have some fun," You purred.

"I'm having plenty of fun," He replied, his voice low and rough.

"Are you sure? You seem a little tense," You teased, your hand slipping under the bottom of his shirt, feeling his skin.

"I'm sure," He said, his hand resting on your waist.

You smiled, your eyes glittering with mischief.

"Let's go somewhere quieter, then," You suggested, pulling him away from the dance floor and towards a secluded corner.

"Is that a good idea?" He asked, his tone serious, but his eyes twinkling with amusement.

"Probably not," You replied, and he grinned.

You stopped, the two of you hidden by shadows, and Elijah pressed his lips to yours. You could taste the hint of whiskey, the faint scent of his cologne lingering on his skin.

He was so gentle, his hands cupping your cheeks as he kissed you slowly, his lips warm and soft against yours. You wanted something more aggressive from him, you tugged at his hair, trying to deepen the kiss, but he kept his pace slow, steady, torturous.

You pulled away, the alcohol coursing through your veins, your head spinning. You could hear your heartbeat thumping in your ears, feel his breath hot on your cheek.

He was gazing at you, his eyes dark and intense, and you felt a surge of fear and vulnerability that made you snap.

"Stop. Doing. That." You said, pulling away.

"What?"

"Looking at me like that," You replied.

"How am I looking at you?"

"Like...like..." You trailed off, unsure how to explain it. Like he was looking at you like he loved you, like he wanted you. It was unsettling.

"Like I love you? Because I do."

"Shut up," You muttered, avoiding his gaze.

He took your chin and forced you to look at him. His expression was serious, his gaze boring into yours.

"What do I have to do to convince you?" He said pressing you further into the wall, his body trapping yours.

"Do I have to fuck you so hard you never think about another man again?" He growled. "Is that what you want?"

You stared at him, unable to speak.

"Do you want me to tear off your clothes right here and now, and fuck you against the wall, where anyone could see us? Is that what it will take to convince you?" He said, his voice low and husky.

Your mouth opened, but no words came out.

He chuckled, and his lips were on yours, kissing you deeply, passionately, making your knees weak and your heart race. His hands were everywhere, pulling at your clothes, touching every inch of your skin.

"What do I have to do to make you mine and only mine?" He asked, his voice thick and raspy, his fingers gripping your hips and digging in.

You whimpered, trying to catch your breath. He was usually so reserved, so gentle and controlled. This was something else, this was him letting go, and it was overwhelming.

"Lijah-," You moaned, trying to form a coherent thought. "I need some air," You said, pushing him away.

He reluctantly let you go, watching you walk away with pain in his eyes.

You slipped through the crowd and towards the bar, ordering a drink and trying to compose yourself. You could still feel his body heat, his touch on your skin.

"Hey dollface," A voice came from behind you. It was a guy you'd met the night before. Flashes of the fancy kitchen returned to your mind, but you really didn't want to repeat what you'd done last night.

"Hey," You said, smiling politely. "I didn't expect to see you here."

"Yeah, me neither," He laughed. "Can I buy you a drink?"

"Thanks," You replied, finishing the one in your hand. "I'll have a whiskey,"

"Be right back," He winked, disappearing towards the bartender.

You waited for a few minutes before he came back with two glasses of whiskey.

"What are you doing tonight?” He said, giving you a flirty smile.

You gave him a coy smile, sipping your drink.

"Oh, I don't know. Whatever you're into," You said, watching his expression change.

You loved this, the chase, the anticipation of knowing what would happen next. It wasn't even necessarily about the sex, it was about being wanted. You loved to be touched, to be desired, to be looked at with awe and lust. It was easy for you, just a game that you liked to play, a way to make you feel special.

But Elijah was still on your mind, eating away at any enjoyment you should be getting out of this encounter. So you drank, more than you usually did, hoping the alcohol would help numb the feelings you had for him.

Unfortunately, it only made everything worse.

You didn't care about this guy, nor did you want to sleep with him again, you were just enjoying the attention. You needed to forget Elijah and focus on something else, anything.

The rest of the night became a blur, a messy, meaningless haze of alcohol and sounds and hands on your skin. You lost track of time, you stopped caring and you found yourself outside the club, being pulled towards his car, giggling and hiccupping the whole time.

"Come on, sugar, it'll be fun," He slurred, wrapping an arm around you. "Let's have another round at my place," He was trying to pull you into the backseat, and you were too drunk and dizzy to put up a fight.

"I don't know," you mumbled, trying to focus on his face but having a hard time keeping him in your line of vision. He flashed you a dopey smile, leaning in and giving you a sloppy kiss.

"My friieennds will be worried," you protested, trying to get him off you. He wasn't really listening, his attention focusing on groping your ass. You tried to get him to let go of you, pushing on his chest, but he didn't budge.

"I'm sory-" you slurred, "tis was bad idea,"

"Why?" He asked, confusion etched across his face.

"I'm farrrrr to drunk," you said, the words coming out slowly, "I shouldna had that fifth drink,"

"You're very cute when you're drunk," he chuckled, wrapping his arms around your waist.

"Shtop," you slurred, struggling to get out of his grasp.

You saw Elijah leaving the club with Klaus and tried to push the man off.

"My frriiieends areleaving,"

"Come on, they'll understand," he replied, tightening his grip on you.

You started to panic, the world was spinning, and you couldn't think straight. Elijah saw you and came over, the look on his face making it clear that he knew what was going on.

"Lijah-" you said, reaching for him.

The man backed off immediately when he saw Elijah, running his hand through his hair nervously.

"Are you okay?" Elijah asked, pulling you into his arms. You collapsed against his chest, breathing in his familiar scent.

"Too drunk," you slurred, your head lolling against his chest.

He picked you up bridal style, glaring at the man, who was shrinking into himself. He brought you to the car and sat you down in the back seat, he leaned over to fasten your seatbelt and you looked up at him, trying to focus on his face.

"I'm sorry, he jus-just wouldn't stop." You said, your words coming out slowly.

Elijah's demeanor completely changed when he saw how drunk you were. He could smell the alcohol on your breath, see the fog in your eyes.

"Klaus, watch her. I'll be right back," he said, before disappearing.

You tilted your head back, the whole car felt like it was spinning. Klaus was saying something you couldn't quite make out, the words muffled.

You sat in silence for a few minutes, until Elijah came back and got in the car. He had a grim look on his face and there was blood on his shirt.

"Lij-lijah," You whispered, reaching out for him as he sat next to you. "Please tell me you didn't killed him,"

Elijah didn't say a word, just wrapped his arm around you and pulled you close. You leaned into his embrace, resting your head on his shoulder.

"Thank you," You mumbled, your words slurring together.

He smiled slightly, holding you tightly.

You began to drift off to sleep, feeling safe in his arms. He stroked your hair, pressing a kiss to the top of your head.

Elijah was hurt that you ran away after his confession. He was the patient one, the one who always waited for you, always put you first. But he was tired of waiting. He couldn't pretend to not have feelings for you anymore, so he'd said something. Then you fled, too scared of commitment, too frightened of intimacy to stick around.

He'd hoped you would give him a chance, that you could learn to trust him and open your heart. But you had rejected him, again and again, and he was done waiting for you to change your mind.

When the car pulled up in front of the compound, you stumbled out, the alcohol making you unsteady on your feet. Your heels making it impossible to walk properly.

You took a tumble but Klaus caught you, wrapping an arm around your waist and helping you stay upright.

"I got her," Elijah said, his voice soft.

"I'm fiiiiinnnnneeee," You protested, trying to push them away, but you fell again and Elijah picked you up and carried you.

You wrapped your arms around his neck and rested your head on his shoulder, breathing in his scent.

"Always such a gentleman," You giggled, your face buried in his neck.

"Sometimes," He said, amusement clear in his voice.

"You look very nice tonight," you added, tugging at his hair.

He brought you to your room and set you on the bed, pulling off your heels and helping you under the blankets.

"Lijah I'm cold, will you come keep me warm?" You pouted, batting your eyelashes at him.

Elijah let out a long sigh, and climbed into bed with you, his arms wrapped around your waist.

You cuddled up to him, enjoying the feeling of his strong arms around you. You couldn't deny the feelings you had for him, but you were determined to push them away. You didn't deserve him, he was far too good for you.

"I'm sorry, Lijah," You whispered, you placed your thigh around his hips, wrapping yourself around him. You wanted him closer, you wanted to feel his skin against yours, feel his heartbeat against your chest. "I want you," you breathed, pressing your lips to his.

He didn't respond, just pulled his head back and stared at you. His gaze was intense, and you found yourself unable to look away, you felt like your heart was being cracked open, exposed.

"No, you don't, you're just drunk," He whispered, his breath hot on your cheek. You were confused, conflicted by the emotions you were feeling, the sensations his closeness provoked.

"Let me show you," You whispered, grabbing the lapels of his jacket, trying to kiss him again, but he pulled back, breaking your hold.

You whimpered, frustrated, as he carefully unwound your arms, freeing himself.

"I can't keep doing this," He said, his voice pained, "it's not fair to either of us. I'm done being the second choice. I'm done being the one you run to when you have nowhere else to go."

"That's not true-" You said, tears welling up in your eyes. You felt like your heart was breaking, shattering into a million pieces, but you couldn't let him know, you couldn't show how much you were hurting.

"Isn't it?" He asked, his tone calm, but there was a fury in his eyes, "I love you, but this isn't working. I'm done wasting my time waiting for you to pick me. I'm just...I'm done,"

You felt like he'd punched you in the gut, your heart was pounding, your stomach twisting in knots. You tried to think of a reply, but you couldn't find any words. You laid there in silence, unable to speak.

He looked at you for a moment, then nodded to himself, as if he'd made up his mind. He got out of bed and left without a word.

Your mind raced as you processed what had just happened.

You were overwhelmed, your emotions a hurricane in your mind. Everything was a mess. You could feel your heart rate rising, your body starting to shake, your breathing coming in shallow bursts. You closed your eyes, trying to calm yourself down, trying to relax, but the panic wouldn't go away.

Then it started, you were shaking uncontrollably, tears pouring down your face, and you couldn't stop crying. You rolled onto your side and curled into a ball, gripping your legs as tightly as possible, the tears flowing freely as you let out a strangled sob.

You cried yourself to sleep, Elijah's name on your lips.

The next morning, you woke up with a pounding headache and a mouthful of sand. Your whole body ached, and the sunlight streaming through the windows made your head throb.

You dragged yourself from the shower, then to the kitchen, in search of coffee like it was a life line.

"Morning, sunshine," Rebekah chirped, way too cheerful for how shitty you felt.

You just grunted in response, pouring yourself a cup of coffee and adding a splash of whiskey. "Can you turn me so I don't have to feel like shit," You asked, leaning against the counter.

Rebekah snorted, sipping her coffee.

"That's a terrible reason to become a vampire," She replied, raising an eyebrow.

"Well, it would save me from hangovers," You shot back, and she shook her head, amused.

"So, how was your night?" You asked, and she smirked, her eyes glinting with mischief.

"It was fantastic," She replied, and you chuckled, taking a long drink of your coffee.

"I'm glad someone had a good time," You said, and she gave you a sympathetic look.

"I thought you and Elijah were hitting it off?" She asked, and you sighed, shaking your head.

"It's complicated," You replied, not wanting to go into detail.

"It's not," she replied, her tone matter-of-fact. "You are just making it so,"

You glared at her, irritated.

"Look, I'm not trying to pry, but I've seen the way you two look at each other. You are both just being stubborn," She continued, and you huffed, rolling your eyes.

"Whatever, I don't want to talk about it," You replied, trying to change the subject.

"Love can be messy," She said, and you laughed, shaking your head.

"Yeah, that's why I don't do it," You replied, and she gave you a look, her brow furrowed.

"You love Elijah, it's not a dirty word," She said, and you scoffed.

"I do not," You protested, and she sighed, exasperated.

"Love isn't something you can opt out of," She replied, her voice soft. "Trust me I've tried,"

You were silent, unable to think of a retort.

"You are just scared, that's all," She continued, and you looked away, not wanting to meet her gaze.

"There's nothing wrong with that, but it's also no reason to run away," She added, her voice gentle.

"I'm not running, I'm living my best life," You replied, a hint of bitterness in your voice.

She just stared at you, her expression one of pity.

"Yeah, well, maybe your best life needs some changes," She said, finishing her coffee and standing up. "I'll see you later,"

You slunk into a chair, nursing your coffee and trying to ignore the gnawing feeling in your stomach.

You didn't even try to deny her accusations, the words dying in your throat. Because she was right, you were scared.

You found Elijah in his room, sitting on the window seat, reading. He looked up when you entered, a small smile on his face.

"How are you feeling? He asked.

"Like shit," You mumbled, shuffling your feet.

"Understandable," He replied, looking back down at his book.

You fidgeted with the hem of your dress, unable to meet his gaze.

"So, last night..." You started, trailing off.

He glanced at you, a curious look on his face.

"I'm sorry," You continued, looking down at your feet.

He put his book down and stood up, walking over to you. He kept his distance, but there was a familiar look in his eyes.

"Did you really mean it? When you said you didn't want this?" You asked, gesturing between the two of you.

"What would you have me do?" He asked, his expression unreadable.

You opened your mouth to say something, but nothing came out. You didn't know what to say, you didn't have the words to describe what you were feeling. So you did what you always did when things got tough, you shut down, closed yourself off and tried to run.

You turned away, ready to walk out, but Elijah grabbed your arm, stopping you. He pulled you close, his face inches from yours.

"Why do you keep pushing me away?" He asked, his voice soft.

You swallowed hard, your throat dry. You tried to think of something to say, something that would make him understand, but your mind was blank.

"Because... Because I'm scared," You said, your voice barely a whisper.

He lifted your chin up, his gaze searching yours.

"What are you afraid of?" He asked, and you let out a shaky breath.

"I'm afraid of losing you," You said, your voice breaking slightly. "I'm afraid that you'll break my heart,"

His eyes grew dark and he pushed you back against the wall. Your heart hammered in your chest, fear and desire surging through your body. His hands gripped your hips, his gaze hungry and dangerous. You saw his desire, his love, and for once, you didn't want to run from it.

You pushed against his chest, your breathing becoming shallow, but he didn't budge. He was firm, unyielding, just like his love for you.

His hands traveled up your body, pushing up your dress. He pulled it over your head and tossed it aside, leaving you exposed and vulnerable before him. He looked down at you, drinking in the sight, and you felt a rush of heat in your core. His gaze was almost too much to bear, but you held it, refusing to back down. He pressed his lips to yours, the kiss hungry and rough, and you moaned against his lips.

"I can't share you anymore," he whispered, his voice strained with effort, his nose buried in your neck.

"You don't have to," you mumbled, gasping when he sank his fangs into your neck. You gripped his shoulders, holding on for dear life.

"Good," he growled, withdrawing his fangs. His tongue lapped at your neck, sending a wave of pleasure through you.

"Mine," he said, a possessive edge to his voice.

You trembled under his touch, his kiss growing even more heated. He pinned your wrists above your head with one hand, the other gripping your waist, his fingers digging into your skin. He lifted your thigh, wrapping it around his hips and pressing your back against the wall.

"I'm going keep you in my bed until you understand," he growled, and you moaned, unable to think straight.

He ripped your panties off, tossing them aside before sinking two fingers into you. You arched your back, grinding against his hand, desperate for relief. He pressed his thumb against your clit, rubbing it in slow circles as his fingers pumped into you.

He watched you, a small smirk on his face, enjoying the way you came undone beneath him. Something in him had snapped, and he could not longer hold back his need for you to be his. He tried many times to show you how much he loves you, but you always ran away at the first sign of intimacy. Not this time though, he was going to break down every wall you'd built and claim you.

You were getting closer to the edge, your breathing labored as your pleasure built. Just as you were on the verge, he removed his fingers from you, denying you relief. You cried out, trying to grind against him, but he held you still. He loved seeing you like this, desperate and begging for him.

"Now you know how I feel," he whispered, and you gasped, his words sending a shockwave through you.

He chuckled softly, his breath warm against your neck. He wrapped his arms around your waist and flipped you around, slamming you against the wall, making the painting beside you rattling in its place.

He pressed himself into your back, his hand circling your throat, the other wandering freely. He ran his finger along the clasp of your bra, freeing your breasts from the lacy material.

His fingers traced your nipples, teasing them into stiff peaks, his lips on your neck. You whimpered as he rolled his hips against you, the bulge in his pants rubbing against your ass.

"I'm going to mark every inch of your perfect skin," He purred, his voice thick with desire. "So everyone knows you are mine,"

He nipped at your neck, his fangs threatening to break the surface again. You moaned, grinding against him, desperate for more. He chuckled, sucking at the spot on your neck, leaving a dark hickey behind.

He pulled you away from the wall and pushed you onto the bed, forcing you onto all fours. His hands gripped your hips, and he leaned forward, licking a strip down the length of your spine. You shivered, your whole body alive and sensitive to his touch. He slid his tongue between your cheeks, stopping to suck and lick at your tight little hole, sending wave after wave of pleasure through you.

You tried to sit up but he pushed you back down, his tongue spearing into your rear entrance. You moaned, squirming under him, your face flushed with desire. He inserted a finger into your pussy, and began to slowly fuck you.

It didn't take long for your thighs to start shaking, your muscles tensing as your orgasm approached. You bit your lip, trying to hold back, but it was futile. You let go with a low moan and suddenly yelped as he sunk his fangs into your ass cheek.

"Lijah!" You exclaimed, surprised.

This rough, wild side of him, so completely different from the gentle, refined man you knew, it scared and excited you. The way took control was the most erotic thing you've experienced in a long time.

He flipped you over and pressed you down onto the bed, straddling you. His pupils were blown wide, his lips stained red with blood, his breathing heavy. You tried to reach up and touch him, but he pinned your wrists down. You lay there, unable to move, completely at his mercy. You had never felt so safe and loved in your entire life.

He freed your wrists kissed them gently, a soothing gesture that contrasted with the roughness from earlier. His lips trailed down your arms, kissing, sucking, and nipping at your skin. You shuddered as his breath ghosted against your neck.

You tugged at his shirt, and he let you strip him of it, his bare skin warm and firm against your own. You ran your hands over his chest, relishing the feel of him.

He pulled off his pants, laying down beside you, your naked bodies intertwining. You stared up at him, a soft smile on your lips. He returned it, his gaze unguarded and gentle. He captured your lips in a sweet kiss, his hands stroking your face and hair.

"I'm sorry for being a fool," you said softly, your eyes glassy with tears.

"Shhh," he murmured, nuzzling your neck. "You have nothing to be sorry for,"

"I do," you insisted. "I love you, I've always loved you. I was just...I was just scared to admit it, to myself or anyone else."

You looked up at him, your expression vulnerable, your eyes pleading. He smiled softly and brushed his lips against yours, a gentle kiss, almost a question.

"Be mine, only mine," he whispered, his forehead resting against yours.

"Yes," you breathed, your heart hammering in your chest. "Always."

He parted your legs and slowly eased inside of you, a growl rumbling deep in his chest. He began moving his hips in a rhythmic motion, his fingers gripping the sheets.

You looked into his eyes, feeling whole. He was giving you such pleasure, and his love radiated from him, engulfing you. Everything behind his eyes, the trust and tenderness, the pain and loneliness, you saw all of it.

It made you feel like you were part of his inner world. He was baring his soul to you, letting you in and you were doing the same, letting him see beyond all of the walls and boundaries, right into the depths of your heart and spirit.

And the intensity of it all wasn't scary, it felt liberating, it felt right. His body was just a shell for his fire, for the overwhelming love he felt for you. You both weren't physical beings anymore, but something beyond. Like you are one entity, one flame, burning bright.

You couldn't really describe how you felt, but there was this sense of completion, like you've found something that had been missing all this time. You could see it in his eyes too, a weight had been lifted off his shoulders and he looked lighter somehow.

You two were making love, and you were both acutely aware of it. There was no mistaking this for anything less, even if you tried. Time seemed to stand still and the outside world fell away, leaving only the two of you. No past or future, just the present.

You didn't need to talk, there was no need for words. You could feel his thoughts, and you could feel him understand yours, the two of you harmonizing and flowing with each other in an endless, gentle rhythm.

This was what he wanted all this time, to show you what sex can really mean when it is shared between two souls, two hearts. Not just animalistic fucking, but pure love-making, a deeper level of intimacy. And you understood now, you were becoming one.

You didn't know how long you had been making love, it could have been hours, or maybe it was days. All you knew was that it was the best experience of your life.

He was being serious when he said he was going to keep you in his bed until you understood. And now you do, now you understand what it means to be loved by him. What it is like to be part of him, to share that connection, that bond.

Your bodies were covered with sweat, entangled as one, both of you out of breath. Every muscle was sore but you didn't care. You were drunk off his love.

"Can we stay like this forever?" You asked, your eyes half closed, exhaustion setting in.

"Yes," He whispered, caressing your cheek. "Because you are mine, all mine,"

"Yours," you said sleepily, snuggling into him.

This was just one night together, a small taste of what being with him was going to be like, and you knew you would never be the same again. He had destroyed your walls and torn down every boundary you had built around yourself.

He held your bleeding heart in his hands, and instead of crushing it, he gave you his own.

{Moodboard->}

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tarjapearce · 7 months

Note

I miss the soccer family, but I wanna have a fix about what happens during the birth of Rosie? :') I THINK THAT WOULD BE SO CUTE

Baby Rosie can't wait to meet her parents. Literally ~

As Rosie's pregnancy advanced, so did Miguel's eagerness when you reached the final stage of it. A couple of scares had him carrying you like a bride to the car and driving to the nearest hospital.

"She's such a troll already" you grumbled upon returning, tired, sore and so so sleepy.

"Maybe she's afraid the doctor will spank her too hard?" You giggled at his words.

His goofy attempts of lightening the mood always worked. He was a goof underneath an intimidating exterior. Your goof.

"At least we know she's excited to hear you" One of your hands took Miguel's to place it on your belly. His eyes twinkled upon seeing the fussing inside.

"She'll be a troublemaker." With a kiss on your cheek and a little belly rub, he resumed his task of getting home. Thankful that the lights were red to have that little moment with you.

Gabi was surprised to see you back, still pregnant.

"What happened, Mama?" she quickly fetched your slippers and helped you change shoes.

"Ay mi amor, your sister doesn't wanna come out yet."

"Pinche Rosie..."

Gabriella mumbled in a hushed tone, her potty mouth, thanks to Miguel, had been more prominent ever since she hit the thirteens.

"Where is the baby?" Asked the actual baby, Benjamin, while looking at you with his beautiful rusty brown and curious eyes.

"In the oven still, cariño"

"I thought it was on your belly?"

Miguel chuckled and helped to remove your coat.

"Alright, let Mama rest. Rosita will arrive when she feels like it. Are you hungry, mi vida?"

"Not really, but a hot cocoa would be great. God my back is killing me."

You whimpered as Miguel helped you to the couch, too exhausted to waddle over the bed, rubbing circles on your back.

----

That night had been hard, despite the doctors saying Rosie was fine, he couldn't help but think about you and your struggles on carrying his third child. Gabi had proven to be difficult enough, Benji had made an emotional mess out of you, but Rosie was definitely a challenge.

Big round belly nested between your thighs, your hands rubbed tiredly at the discomfort, trying to subdue it. An apologetic smile came to his lips as he kissed your temple. Conveying a fraction of his gratefulness towards you.

Little did you know that he was always marveling at your body and how this adapted so easy to pregnancy. The scientist in him was always observing and making mental notes on your cues to know when you were in pain and absolute discomfort. Right now, all he could do was to lay behind you and bask you in his body heat with a gentle hug.

He knew his temperature made wonders on your aching muscles, your lower back specially. Where the pressure accumulated. He also knew his children would be big, he was a big man after all, and having you go through such changes and pains just to carry his children, had turned in no other but the ultimate love proof from you.

You loved him. Not that you didn't show him, quite the opposite really. Sometimes his brain was too enraptured in seeing his children grow right before his eyes, that whenever you showered him in love it felt like experiencing it for the first time, despite thirteen years preceding you both.

You didn't know what had come over him that hugged you so gently, like holding the most beautiful thing a man could hold, and rubbed your belly softly. Admiring his part of the teamwork.

"Thank you." It came a soft whisper from his lips, "For going through this for us."

A lazy and sleepy smile stretched on your lips.

"You're so sappy I love it." You took his hands and kissed them, "You're the only man I'm willing to have children with. And the only man I'd ever got a baby fever with if I'm honest."

He chuckled in your neck, inhaling your scent.

"Oh really?"

"Yeah. And look at us now. Expecting our third."

His hands massaged your shoulders gently, easing a bit of the building up tension. Then they moved to your breast. It wasn't erotic, but soothing. Intimate even. Your hands drooped as he moved them towards your belly, rubbing from the lowest to the tip, feeling the occasional kicks and movements his daughter replied with at his ministrations.

"You gotta come out, Rosita." He mumbled while his hands kept busy. You had been slowly drifting off to sleep.

---

Contractions appeared every seven minutes, seven minutes you used to breath and whimper. Miguel never left your side, not that you let him anyways, your hand clenched with a vice like grip he whimpered subtly in pain.

"I'm sorry mi amor" You spoke in between breathless sobs. Raging hormones and the nerves always took over you, bus his encouraging words always ground you.

"Mi niña, mírame." He hushed as your temple and cheeks were doused with his kisses and affection.

"I love you. You'll do great ok? I'm here." Clammy hands looked to embrace him, "I've got you, mi reina."

The lump in his throat turned bigger as the doctor approached, ready to get Rosie out. It was time to push. A flurry of things came to his mind, what if the baby was too big?, What if something happened to you last minute? What if-

No. None of that was happening. You were fine, and the pushing was going as great and painful as it should be.

"Just a few more pushes, Mrs. O'Hara. The head is nearly out"

"I so wanna punch you right now" He chuckled and held your hand tightly as you breathed and prepared to push again.

"Eres un cabrón..." (You fucker) you half sobbed half chuckled before pushing.

"Así me amas, chula." (You love me anyways)

The last word came out as a choked whimper as you held to him a bit too strong. Pregnant women's strength always amazed him.

"Una más, corazón, ya casi sale" (One more, sweetheart. She's almost out.)

You took a small break, panting and gasping for air. Sweat etched to your skin, like some strands of hair on your forehead.

The loud and healthy wail of your baby echoed through the room. Rosie had arrived.

Nurses quickly cleaned her and cut the umbilical cord, weighed her down and gave her to you.

"Look at her, Miguel" tears were unavoidably shed. Seeing your baby, your little Rosie finally in your arms, instantly snuggling in your chest, as if seeking refuge from the outside.

"Mama's here, mi amor." You cooed as you rocked her. Miguel's heart gave an enthusiastic shimmy upon seeing his daughter, one of the many pieces of him, latching on your breast.

Silky, soft and dark curls perched ontop of her tiny head. Her skin was a lighter shade of his, cheeks however made honor to her name. Flushed, rosy and oh so ready to be squished and kissed.

He kissed the top of her head and then yours. Whispering sweet swords of gratefulness and a lot of thank yous

His family was finally complete.

#miguel o'hara #miguel o'hara x reader #miguel o'hara x you #atsv miguel #soccer family ⚽🕷️#gabi o'hara #benjamin o'hara #rosie o'hara #wife reader #miguel ohara x you #miguel o'hara fluff #atsv fluff

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yuutasprincess · 8 months

Text

Day 5: Ino Takuma

Word Count: 1.k Warnings: Pussy drunk Ino, super sappy I love him

The building before him hardly resembled what Takuma had anticipated, it’s clean and somewhat private. In front of him stood a blank wall, its sole feature being a solitary hole positioned at hip level. With a quick glance at his phone, Takuma composed one final message before tucking it away: ‘This is where you come?’ A faint vibration emanated from his pocket, but he paid it no heed as the sound of a closing door reached his ears.

‘I don't actually go there. Just messing with you!!Have fun!!!’ Accompanying the text were a series of laughing emojis and playful GIFs, all underscored by a mischievous selfie of Gojo, his hand obscuring a sly grin.

Sucking at his teeth he unbuckles his belt, heat flooding his cheeks as he eyes the hole, “I’m not sure... Uhm, I’ve never done this.” his cock is flaccid as he pulls himself out, embarrassment eats at him as he tries to just do what Gojo told him. Just stick your dick in the hole and let her take care of you. He can’t believe he came here.

Your voice isn't what he expected it to sound like, nothing is the way he assumed it’d be. “That's alright handsome, let me see you.” His blush travels down to his chest, body warm at the smooth tone of your voice resonating through the wall. Ino knows you’re just flirting with him; you can’t really see him but the way your words bounce around his head have his dick hardening.

Takuma half expected to be hunched over somewhere in a bathroom, cock shoved in a hole with the writing ‘insert here’ pointing down while a stranger sucked him off before he’d pay you and tear Gojo a new one for sending him there.

He’s thick, not the longest but his dick is so pretty, angled to the left with a long vein on the underside. You can tell he’s cute, the way he mutters under his breath when he pushes his hips into the wall has you biting back a teasing quip. Taking him into your mouth there's already an ache in your jaw, he’s heavy on your tongue and doesn’t taste unbearable like the other men who visit you. Ino’s moans quickly become your favorite sound, breathless and choked up as his forehead meets the wall.

With Takuma growing in your mouth you swallow around the bulbous head, breathing through your nose slowly you suck his cock until he's hitting your uvula and you're gagging. Throat tight and his dick warm between your tongue and the upper ridges of your mouth, “Ah- Shit, oh my god-” When you swallow again he whines, it’s candy in your ear and you tongue at his bulging veins until he’s pulling away from you.

Shying back to his side of the wall he awes at the way your saliva coats his cock, “I’m not sure- where do I? Um” He can’t even feel embarrassed anymore, his whole body on fire, “Can I cum in your mouth?” You laugh. And the sound is so sweet, it’s airy and has him flustered as he pushes his dick back into the hole.

Chewing at his lower lip, Ino cries at the way you kiss his tip, closes his eyes and imagines the most gorgeous women he’s ever seen cherishing his cock. He’s a romantic. Hands clawing at his sweatshirt when you trace his veins with your tongue, fingers wrapping around his base and pumping him softly. “You’re so big, so pent up.” Takuma can’t get over your voice, mouth dry as you squeeze him in your palm trying to make your fingers touch. “Such a pretty dick, maybe I’ll let you fuck me if you cum.”

Ino entertains the idea of knocking the wall down, he could. But if anyone ever found out how desperate he was for pussy he’d die. He just knows your cunt would feel as good if not better than your mouth. The way you take him inch by inch, tongue lapping under his head has him gripping his hair, scalp burning when you take him all the way into your throat and moan around his length.

When he cums it’s in thick ropes, hot in your mouth while you keep him still with a hand at his base and another fondling his balls, “Shit, shit- oh fuck, so good” His voice is whiny, cock still hard in your hold as you swallow his cum and kiss the long vein running up the bottom of his dick. Takumas hips ache, stomach flat against the wall as he humps the air while you move away. He hears something rip before your hands are back on him, condom between your lips as you slide it on him.

Takuma thinks he might seriously pass out when he feels you slide onto him, you’re so wet the stretch is welcome as he fills you. “I won’t last long, sorry.” Groaning into the wall he practically cries when you start to fuck yourself back into him, his own hips smashing into the wall and shaking it as he chases after your cunt.

Ino might seriously tear this wall down if it means he gets to feel your heat, he can barely hear you over his own panting. “Shit, you feel so good” He’s flattered, your praise making him cum as he stills himself and presses his lips tight to hide the whine trying to leave him. You're still using him as if the roles were reversed and he doesn’t dare pull away. Not even when the pleasure ebbs into pain, he lets you use him until you're clenching around him and pulling away with a wet pop.

Your voice is a whisper while he’s still starstruck, face pressed against the wall heaving and slurring his words trying to thank you, “I don't do this, ever. But I’m out in an hour if you want to really thank me.”

When Ino checks his phone again it’s with you on his lap in the back of his car, cock aching and leaking in your pussy as you sit still. You're putting your number in his contacts when you see the notification, “Smile handsome” With a hand holding his wet chin up you wink at the camera before sending it to whoever Gojo is with a plethora of smiling emojis and an “I did!!” that’ll be left on read for the rest of the night.

#I LOOOVE HIM #jjk smut #jjk x reader #jujutsu kaisen smut #Ino x reader #ino takuma x reader #kinktober

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hopelesslyromanticshark · 2 months

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Can i request a jason grace x reader who is a daughter and champion of posedion?? Like how he's the champion of hera and r is the champion of posdeion :3

✮⋆˙ will you be a champion with me?; jason grace x daughter of poseidon! reader blurb

content: jason grace x daughter of poseidon! reader blurb warning: none! author's note: i tweaked it just the slightest bit because something about them being the champions of their father's wives has me sappy.

you were poseidon's beloved daughter, but his wife's darling champion. amphitrite had taken a fondness to you from the moment you were born, unable to be mad at poseidon for his infidelity as it created such a sweet girl. she had no problems flaunting her affections towards you; every year for your birthday, stunning earrings made of shells or gold rings depicting waves finding their way to your doorstep. from the moment you were born to your last breath, you'd be amphitrite's champion.

similar, hera - juno, whatever - had staked a claim on one of her husband's children. jason grace, his roman son, had quickly become her champion as well. and, upon hearing this news, amphitrite sought out the queen of the gods, eager to discuss their champions. it wasn't so much of a bragging contest as it was a sharing of news, someone to talk about their beloved champions with.

"well, my darling boy is just soaring through the ranks at camp jupiter."

"did i mentions that my precious girl helped lead a war with her brother? oh, and naturally, they won."

okay, well, it was a little about the bragging. and the moment you and jason met, both of your memories wiped, standing in new rome, where you'd been living the last few weeks while jason has been trying to get there for months, hera and amphitrite held their breaths and each others hands. they silently begged aphrodite to be kind, to be gracious to their hearts.

"i'm jason grace," he introduced, holding his hand out.

"i'm y/n l/n," you replied, taking his hand into yours with a soft smile and giving it a firm shake.

and from that moment on, hera and amphitrite had their eyes on the pair. not so much during the battles or when others were around. but, when you and jason were alone, late at night or early in the morning, is when they watched most. the pair of champions would talk, bonding more and more as the seconds passed until it became an overflowing love, an unstoppable force that came to a head in the form of a kiss.

a kiss shared between two child of the big three, but more importantly a kiss shared between the champion of hera and the champion of amphitrite. a kiss that had the two goddesses jumping and squealing for joy up on mount olympus.

a kiss that was the start of something thundering and flowing. something beautiful.

#postcards from covey ౨ৎ #all my love ౨ৎ #pjo #hoo #heroes of olympus x reader #jason grace #jason grace x you #jason grace x reader #jason grace x y/n

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txmxkis · 4 months

Text

can't take my eyes off you

pairing. kuroo tetsurou x gn!reader

genre. fluff

wc. 1236........

warnings. HIGHLY self indulgent as usual, basically self ship coded but hopefully still entertaining and relatable, reader has confidence/self worth issues, sappy af, almost certainly has grammar mistakes

a/n. based on me hating being photographed irl. also why is writing so fun but so scary. TENSES ARE SO HARD

“tetsurou. if you take one more goddamn picture of me, i swear i’ll—"

the sound of his phone camera capturing a picture cuts you off mid sentence, followed immediately by your huff of frustration.

"you'll what, hmm? you don't scare me."

he flashed you a big cheesy grin, all the while still pointing the camera at you. you scowl at him, ready to risk it all and attempt a lunge at his phone in order to stop this madness.

you hated having your picture taken and he knew it, but for some reason he chose to ignore that fact, as if possessed by the need to piss you off. he could be really good at that when he wanted to be.

as soon as you initiated your plan of attack, your hand getting tantalizingly close to the offending device, he pulled it just out of reach. hopelessly, you flopped back onto the bed, groaning in frustration.

“why do you hate me."

“now now. would my camera roll be full of someone i hate?"

“if you were planning to kill me, yea. besides, i dont think having hideous pictures of me is exactly helping your argument.”

he just rolled his eyes in response.

you heard the shutter sound once more while your defenses were down. the last straw.

before he had time to react, you grabbed the nearest blanket and covered your head with it, holding on tightly so that he couldn't expose you to humiliation all over again. you probably had a better chance of ruining his plans by hiding than by trying to overpower him anyway.

“hey! get back here!"

his attempts to uncover you were met with shrieks of protest and a tightened clutch on the blanket. not to mention a few wild jabs of your limbs into the air, which if he hadn't so skillfully dodged, might have hurt just a little.

“fine. time for me to look through these and admire the fruits of my labor."

you cringed at the thought of how the pictures looked. how you looked. most of them were probably blurry anyways because of the thrashing that you were doing to escape the lense, thank god.

maybe you could persuade him to get rid of them. maybe you could sneak into his phone later and delete them yourself. maybe—

“you're beautiful, you know."

all thoughts of treachery came to a screeching halt. after sitting there with your mouth open in shock for a good few seconds, you shook your head, moving the blanket with it.

“nuh uh."

“yuh huh."

“nope."

“without doubt."

his tone of finality made you want to scream your throat sore, but instead you lay there quietly, silently disagreeing with him again.

it was relatively quiet for far too long after that, with quiet cackles drifting over from the other side of the bed being the only sound you could hear from underneath your shield. presumably brought on by pictures that were extra stupid. not to mention revolting.

your thoughts were spiralling right along with your mood now, eyes almost welling up with tears, but you stubbornly pushed them back. it seemed ridiculous to get this worked up over something that wasn't necessarily that serious. kuroo was just trying to be playful and you knew that. it was hard not to feel this way, though, especially when it came to something that was such a big insecurity.

he sighed loudly, snapping you out of your head momentarily.

“can you please come out from under there? i swear the camera's not open. i put the phone down and everything.”

“liar."

“am not! i just wanna see your pretty face with my own eyes now."

you grumbled a weak protest before relenting.

“fine. but i swear if you—"

“would you just hurry up already."

“oh my god, alright."

you slowly pulled the blanket from your face, and you could see that he was telling the truth. for now at least. he was lying there right next to you, already staring, as if straight into your soul. god, you wanted to shrivel up and disappear immediately.

“it's rude to stare, you know."

“don’t care."

you felt so awkward and exposed, and the only thought in your mind now was getting out of this conversation.

you started to try and untangle yourself from the blankets and get up out of the bed, only to feel your own arm being pulled out from under you. falling back next to kuroo, you covered your face and made a noise of frustration.

the first thing you saw after pulling your hands from your face again were those amber eyes still fixed on you, a slight grin on that smackable face.

“ummmm, hello? can I leave?"

he shrugged.

“you can do whatever you want."

you tried to sit up and leave again, only to be pulled right back down next to him a second time.

“i- what's happening right now?”

“good question. i changed my mind, you don't get to leave anymore.”

you masked your face with a deadpan expression, only because you were desperately trying to avoid giving him the satisfaction of seeing you crack a smile.

“are you serious right now?"

“as the plague."

at that, you couldn't help but snort.

“and why is it that you're trapping me here?"

“i decided that you have to lie here and listen to me tell you why you're amazing."

“yea, sure, whatever you say."

“i really can make you a list if you want. although i think it would take less time to make a list of reasons why i don't like you."

“i pick that one."

“ha! nice try. hmm, now let's see... you're endlessly stubborn. quiet and standoffish with most people.”

you raised an eyebrow. maybe this wouldn't be so difficult after all.

“though still kind to everyone who deserves it. alluring. determined. passionate even when it's hard. you care so much that it's scary sometimes. ”

you avoided eye contact. okay. at this point you were starting to feel far too exposed again.

"you try way too hard to keep people at arm's length, but if they're lucky enough to be loved by you, they're taken care of whenever, wherever. you're smart, even if you don't think it's true. stunning as well as irresistible.”

when he said that, he caressed your cheek while you basically became one with the mattress.

“and so independent that it feels like you don't need me around sometimes. but also soft and gentle and giving.”

his voice had dropped almost to a whisper when he spoke those last words. at this point, your face was nearly burning off. you were almost sure that he could feel the heat radiating from you.

“okay, okay—"

“and, oh yea, did i mention beautiful? enough to be my wallpaper."

he picked up his phone and flashed it at you, a slightly blurry picture from not twenty minutes before illuminating the screen. you could tell he was proud of himself from the smug grin stretched across his face.

“you're an ass."

“come onnnnn, you love me, admit it.“

right then, your chest swelled with affection for him, so much that it felt like you could suffocate. still, you paused just long enough for him to start acting offended, before smiling softly and speaking quietly.

“yea, i really do. thank you, tetsurou.”

thank you for reading! <3 — txmxkis

#kuroo x reader #kuroo tetsuro x reader #kuroo tetsurou x reader #kuroo fluff #haikyuu x reader #hq x reader #haikyuu fluff #hq fluff #haikyuu imagines #haikyuu drabbles #haikyuu scenarios #hq imagines #hq drabbles #hq scenarios #what up its ya boy with more self indulgent as fuck writing #i just want him to love me into loving myself yk #anyways happy valentine's day!!!#screams and runs away #[☂] — rini writes!

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ilovepedro · 9 months

Text

Yellow | joel miller x f!reader

Summary: You and Joel take a well-deserved vacation to the secluded countryside of Texas. Unbeknownst to you, Joel has a special surprise up his sleeve.

Word count: ~3.7k (oopsies)

Rating: 18+ Minors DNI

Warnings: no outbreak AU (Sarah is alive and well, but she isn’t in this), established relationship, smut like lots of it, oral (f receiving), fingering, unprotected PIV (wrap it up y’all), overstimulation, soft!joel (idc if he’s OOC, i love that big ol’ softie), so much fluff, hella petnames (baby, darlin, babydoll, honey), reader is female, but has no physical description. NO USE OF Y/N

A/N: this is my first time writing any sort of fanfiction with a developed brain lol. i’ve had this idea for a while since Joel’s been rotting my brain for the past year-ish. i'm also a big fan of Pablo Neruda and i was reading some of his poems while listening to my love song playlist so i was feeling sappy lol. this is based on one of my favorite love songs, Yellow by Coldplay. feel free to listen while you read! shoutout to @gracieheartsspedro for your kind words and for giving me the confidence boost to post 🩷 and thank you to all of y’all for being so sweet to me and welcoming me here with open arms <3

star banner by @benkeibear 🌟

Look at the stars

Look how they shine for you

And everything you do

Yeah, they were all yellow

“Dance with me, honey.” The strumming guitar intro to Yellow by Coldplay flutters through the speaker and invades the cool evening breeze as the sun sets. The moon and stars begin to peek through the cotton candy skies. Joel holds his hand out to you as the two of you unwind in the field behind the remote Texas lake house you two are staying at for the week. A long overdue vacation for the both of you, you’ve spent your last full day basking in the refreshing water of the lake, seeking relief from the brutal Texas summer sun.

You gladly take his hand, flashing him a saccharine smile as you intertwine your fingers with his. “Joel Miller, ever the charmer,” you say as he wraps an arm around your waist. He hides his face in the crook of your neck, bashful like a schoolboy. Your stomach flutters as he still manages to give you butterflies after 3 years of being with him. He quietly rasps the lyrics in your ear.

I came along

I wrote a song for you

He lifts his head up to meet your gaze, matching the saccharine look that adorns your face. His heart is so full, so overwhelmed with how much he loves you. You’ve turned him into a sap, but he wouldn’t change a thing. “You’re so damn beautiful, baby. ‘M almost the luckiest man in the world.” You quirk your brow, a curious smirk lacing your features. “Almost?”

And all the things you do

And it was called Yellow

He twirls you with a smile, eliciting a giggle from you. His chest blooms with warmth - a mixture of bliss and nerves. He twirls you one more time, your head thrown back as you let out a hearty laugh. Suddenly, he’s down on one knee holding the most beautiful ring before he loses his confidence to ask you the most important question of your lives. You turn back to him, a gasp escaping your lungs as tears well in your eyes.

So then I took my turn

Oh what a thing to have done

And it was all yellow

“Almost, darlin’, ‘cause you’ll make me the luckiest man in the world after this. You know me better than anyone, darlin’, so ya know ‘m no good at this type of stuff, but I hope you know that I’ll do anything for you, baby. I didn’t expect to find my other half that day we met. Was just tryna get my coffee and go ‘cause I didn’t wanna be late. But, god, you looked so damn cute in that pretty blue sweater. Most beautiful woman I’ve ever seen. So beautiful you distracted me and I spilled my coffee all over ya. ‘M glad I did though, ‘r else I wouldn’t’ve taken ya out to dinner to make it up to you. Ended up bein’ late anyway, but I’d be late everyday if it meant seein’ your pretty lil’ smile. You make me wanna be a better man ‘n I hope ‘m everything you could ever want ‘cause ‘s what you are to me. You're the best partner, best woman, best momma. You’re the best momma to Sarah, honey. Can’t thank ya enough for lovin’ her as your own. You make her, us, me, so goddamn happy, baby. I’d be a damn fool if I didn’t put a ring on your pretty little finger, honey. Shit, ‘m one for not doing this sooner. Thank you for lovin’ me and bein’ so patient with my stubborn ass. I know I ain’t easy to deal with. My knees are killin’ me though, baby, so I got a real important question for you: will you marry me, darlin’?”

Your skin, oh yeah your skin and bones

Turn into something beautiful

And you know, you know I love you so

You know I love you so

You’re smiling so hard your face hurts. Tears cascading down your face, which you don’t realize until you taste the salty water on your lips. “Yes, Joel,” you unintentionally whisper, Joel having knocked the air from your lungs. His smile grows wider. He gently slips the ring on your left ring finger. You lean down to kiss him, but he meets you halfway as he goes to stand. He cups your cheeks in his large, warm hands with your hands encompassing his. Pressing a deep kiss to one another’s lips, a kiss full of warmth, life, love - a promise of forever.

“Joel, baby,” you say as you pull away, hands still resting atop his while he delicately holds you. Your voice is wobbly as you’re still silently crying. You’re rendered speechless for the first time in your life. Your heart has never felt this full. You’ve never felt so alive, so complete. “I love you so much. I can’t even put it into words. You’re everything to me and more. I’d be honored to be your wife.” He smiles, tears gleam in his eyes. Joel Miller, the serious, gruff man, is in tears - because of you; a side only reserved for you.

I swam across

I jumped across for you

Oh, what a thing to do

‘Cause you were all yellow

“I meant every word, baby. Every word in that song ‘s true too. ‘S why it’s our song. The stars shine for you, but I think you’re prettier ‘an all the stars in the sky.” He pulls you in for another kiss, just as saccharine as the previous one. You’re both smiling into it. You hum as you pull away. “Baby, what’re you talking about you’re ‘no good at this type of stuff,’ Joel Miller, you’re a poet,” you laugh as you playfully question him. He throws his head back, a belly laugh escaping him. He smiles even bigger as he spots a twinkle in your eye. “Only for you, darlin’.” He moves his hands to your waist again, holding one of your hands in his as he leads you into a dance again. The big, cheesy smiles never leave your faces. Placing your free hand on his shoulder, the two of you sway to the music.

I drew a line, I drew a line for you

Oh, what a thing to do

And it was all yellow

“Forever,” you whisper as you press your nose against his while he sways you both side to side. “Forever,” he repeats. Another kiss is pressed to your lips, a hungrier one, a combination of love and lust. He releases your hand to cup the back of your head while he pulls you in by waist, bringing you closer. You throw your arms around his sturdy middle - the kiss deepens. He licks into your mouth, eliciting a soft moan from you. “Take me to bed, Joel,” you huskily whisper. “Anything for my wife.” You beam at his words. “Not your wife, honey.” “Yet, darlin’. Yet.”

The moon peeks through the window, casting a cool glow on the entire room. The crisp late night breeze ripples the curtains hanging on the window the two of you mindlessly left open as you devoured one another earlier in the evening.

You stir, groggy as you’re awoken by the familiar dull ache in between your legs. Feeling a heavy, but comforting weight on your torso, you turn gently so as to not wake him. Now facing him,Joel’s arm still holds you flushed against his chest.

It’s the middle of the night, the bedside clock flashes 3:30 in small fluorescent blue lights. Both of you spent, as the events of the day having wiped you two out. He slowly, but deliciously wrecked your cunt twice, once with his mouth and once with his cock, before you both drifted off to sleep. He’s still sleeping. He is so beautiful. I’m so lucky.

His plush lips slightly parted as he softly snores. His full lashes lightly kiss his cheeks. Brows pulled into his infamous furrow. You carefully brush the curve of his strong nose, which you rode into the midnight hour, with your left hand. The moonlight catches a glimpse of the ring he gave you just hours ago. A delicate gold band adorning a diamond, 2 smaller stones surrounding it.

Your skin, oh yeah, your skin and bones

Turn into something beautiful

And you know, for you, I’d bleed myself dry

For you, I’d bleed myself dry

Tears well in your eyes as you recall his proposal from the evening. Your heart overflows with content as you admire the man in front of you. You get to fall asleep and wake up like this for the rest of your lives. He is my forever. You softly caress his face, careful not to wake him. Alas, your attempt fails.

Joel begins to stir while you continue to caress his patchy beard as you internally dwell on the thought of being his for eternity. Stretching his taut tan muscles, groaning as he does so. “Ya watchin’ me sleep, babydoll? How long ya been awake?” A sleepy smile creeps onto his face.

“I’m just admiring my gorgeous fiancé’s face. And not very long, only about 5 minutes,” you sigh. His sleepy smile morphs into a toothy grin. “Oh really? I’m sure he can’t be nearly as gorgeous as mine. She’s the most beautiful woman in the world. Your fiancé is a lucky man, honey.” He leans in to press a sleepy kiss to your lips, the two of you smiling into it. It’s soft and sweet, lingering like honey sticking to your lips.

It’s true

Look how they shine for you

He moves his hand from your torso to the back of your head, grasping your hair, deepening the kiss. He pulls you closer, completely flushed against his bare chest. The dull ache in between your legs blooms with desire, transforming into a throbbing need. You moan as his hardening length presses against your exposed cunt. Neither of you bothered to dress before falling asleep.

The kiss grows sloppy as he licks into your mouth, teeth clashing together. You break apart gasping for air. “Joel,” you breathlessly moan as he kisses down your neck and shuffles the two of you so you’re pinned under him. He sucks onto that sensitive spot on your neck near your ear. The spot which he knows drives you crazy.

“Joel,” you moan louder this time. It comes out more desperate than you intended. “Be a good girl and use your words, baby.” He’s so fucking smug, he drives you insane. “Need you, baby. N-need you so bad, Joel,” you gasp as he makes his way down to your breasts.

He hums, sucking a nipple into your mouth as he gropes your other breast, rolling your nipple in between his calloused fingers. “F-fuck, baby. Feels, ah, s-so good,” you say as you arch your back, granting him even more access to your breasts. He moans at your praise, the vibration of it sending shockwaves down your spine to your weeping cunt. Kissing his way down your tummy and finally making his way to where you need him most. Your exposed cunt aches for him to do something - anything.

He hooks both your legs over his shoulders as he kneels off the edge of the bed. He presses soft kisses and nips to your thighs, actively avoiding your throbbing clit. His scruffy beard scratches your thighs, causing more arousal to pool at your sex. Every teasing kiss causes your clit to twitch. He sees it, you know he can, but he continues to act oblivious. You writhe under his touch, growing frustrated as your body yearns for some sort of relief.

“Joel, please, n-no more teas - hmph - teasing” you whine, clearly exasperated. He chuckles at your neediness. “So needy, babydoll. Already fucked your cunt twice last night ‘n you still want more?” “Yes, Joel,” you beg, desperate tears begin to pool in your eyes. “Always want more. Always want you,” you cry out. You quickly see something soften in his eyes, but it disappears just as fast. “Always want you too, darlin’. Don’t worry. I’ll take care of ya. Always do, don’t I?”

Before you could answer, he licks a stripe up your folds, his nose nudging at your clit. Gasping at the relief of finally feeling something, you involuntarily buck your hips up into his face. He places one of his large hands and pushes you back down, the pressure on your stomach causing a new pool of desire to drip from your pussy. You can’t control the moans leaving your lips as he flicks his tongue against your twitching clit. “Joel, f-fuck oh my god, Joel,” you cry out, tugging on his hair.

Your hair tugging elicits a moan from him, the rumble of it causing you to shiver. He eats you out like a starved man, as if he wasn’t doing this just barely 4 hours ago. “Joel, n-need more. P-please, baby.” Obliging your request, he inserts one finger deep inside your pussy, drawing out a high pitched moan from you. He could always reach places you never could, his fingers much larger and thicker than yours.

“Sweetest fuckin’ pussy in the world, baby. My favorite meal,” he says as he inserts another finger into you. Another mewl escapes your lips. He returns his tongue to your clit, relentlessly flicking it. He feels your walls begin to flutter around his fingers as he curls his fingers, hitting your g-spot.

“Right there, Joel! Oh, f-fuck yes, baby.” It sounds obscene as he slurps up your slick while pumping his thick fingers deep into your squelching pussy. You feel light as a feather as your orgasm approaches. “‘s it, baby. Cum for me. Can feel ya squeezing my fingers. Come on, babydoll. Make a mess on my fingers.” He sucks your clit into his mouth causing your orgasm to crash into you. Your eyes roll to the back of your head as you seize up under his hold, endless moans streaming from your lips.

Lapping at your pussy, he drinks up all of your cum, letting no drop go to waste. He pulls away, giving you a brief moment of relief. The pale moonlight shines onto him, as if he were some sort of deity from above. He is - he is your saving grace.

He pulls himself up and slots his hips between yours. He teases your wet folds by rubbing his hard, pulsating cock up and down against them, slathering himself in the fresh new wave of slick that runs down your weeping cunt. Pre-cum dribbles from his angry, red tip, smearing over your folds. Without warning, he shoves his cock deep into your pussy in one thrust, buried to the hilt.

“Oh fuck Joel! S-so fucking big, so, shit, so deep.” “You can take it, baby. Ya always do.” His pace is brutal, his thick cock brutally kissing your cervix with each thrust. He hikes your legs up, placing your ankles on his shoulders, practically bending you in half. You scream at the new position. You’re so loud, you’re thankful there are no neighbors around here. He’s always so deliciously deep, you’ll never get used to it.

He picks up the pace, your thighs begin to burn and your cunt still aches from being stuffed repeatedly. The line between pain and pleasure blurs, but you feel so damn good. Tears begin to fall from your eyes as you clamp down on him. The pornographic sounds of moans, pants, and your squelching cunt fill the room. You’re already so close as you had no time to come down from your first orgasm.

“Fuck, darlin’. Ya hear that? Hear how fuckin’ wet ya are for me? Feel so fuckin’ good. Can’t believe I get to have this tight little pussy for the rest of my life. ‘S mine. All mine. Can’t wait til, ah, til you’re my pretty little wife.” He groans, as you clench around him. His words spurring you on. “‘S yours, Joel. ‘M yours, all yours, baby,” you manage to slur out. He’s close, you can tell as his thrusts get sloppier. “Come on, baby, gimme another. Need to feel you soak my cock.”

He licks the pad of his thumb and swirls it on your clit. You tumble over the cliff and plummet into your second orgasm. His cock, his fingers, his words, him. It’s all too much. You feel him everywhere. Your vision flashes hot white. The burning coil in your belly snaps as you come undone. A guttural moan escapes from deep within your chest. “Oh fuck, Joel! I’m gonna, ah, ‘m cumming,” you squeal from under him with your eyes rolling back again. You’re cumming again, hard, soaking his cock just like he asked. “Atta girl, baby. Good girl,” he rasps as he fucks you through the waves of your second orgasm. You’re squeezing him so tight you nearly push him out.

His pace is still relentless, not giving you time to come down from your second high. Suddenly, you’re being flipped around as Joel rolls you over him. He lays on his back with you now on top. The new angle has him even deeper than before, if that’s even possible. His cock immediately hits your g-spot again. A choked cry falls from your lips while you try to brace yourself on his broad, sturdy chest.

“‘M close, baby. Fuck, ya feel so fuckin’ good. Cum for me one more time, baby.” His breath is ragged now. You’re a babbling mess as he continues to fuck up into you. “I got you, baby. Just gimme one more. Come on, be a good girl and gimme one last one, babydoll.” He’s fucking up into you hard and fast, his thrusts growing sloppier than ever as he nears his orgasm.

“Baby, I-I can’t,” you hiccup. “Yes, ya can, darlin’. You’re so close, can feel ya clenching ‘round me again. Let go, baby. I got you.” He sits up and pulls you closer, you’re completely flushed against his strong chest now. He wipes your stray tears, his tenderness sends you crashing into your third and final orgasm - one more orgasm than last night. He’s so rough, but so gentle with you at the same time.

A drawn out high-pitched moan escapes you once again, eyes squeezed shut while mewling his name as you clench around him. “Fuck, Joel!” Your soul disappears from your body, floating around somewhere along with your brain. Joel, Joel, Joel being the only thought in your head as his name repeatedly streams from your lips - like a prayer.

He grunts and fucks up into you with three more thrusts before he comes undone. A loud, guttural moan escapes from his lips. He’s babbling as he’s shooting his load into you. “Fuck! ‘S it, honey! Take it, baby, take it! Good girl, shit, fuck, Jesus Christ!” You feel his cum coat your walls as he fills you up. There’s so much cum, it’s dripping from your swollen, wrecked cunt. Joel buries his face in the crook of your neck as you both pant, grappling with reality as you both come down from your highs.

He places tender kisses on your shoulder. Both of you are sticky with salty sweat, the periwinkle moonlight beaming into the room now. You feel a soft kiss brush against your cheek, causing your eyes to flutter open.

“Hi,” he huskily whispers with a gentle smile. “Hi,” you say with a bashful grin, biting your bottom lip while you return back down to Earth. Staring at each other with the same hazy, fucked out gaze, he crashes his lips to yours, lazily kissing you. You taste yourself on his tongue as he languidly slips it into your mouth.

He sighs as you part to lift yourself off him, both of you hissing at the loss of one another. Worry laces his features as you settle on the bed beside him, laying down on his chest. His rapid heartbeat slowly returning to a steady thrum, grounding you back in the present. “You feel okay, baby? Didn’t hurt you, did I?” How on Earth you got so lucky, you’ll never know.

Your gaze softens once more, reaching out to caress his cheek. “I feel absolutely amazing, Joel. You could never hurt me, baby.” He gingerly kisses your palm. Steady breathing and comfortable silence fill the air - postcoital bliss settling amongst you two.

He toys with the ring on your finger as his strong arm rests on your torso, engrossing you in his embrace. “You’re gonna be my wife,” he says as he smiles at you, disbelief and contentment lacing his voice. Love filling his eyes to the brim, just like his heart. Tears well in your eyes once more as you fully drink him in. You’re so full of love and happiness, there is nowhere else for your emotions to go except flowing down your cheeks. Something that happens often as you feel things deeply within your heart. It’s one of the things he loves most about you. “Jus’ means you got lots ‘a love to give in that big ol’ heart ‘a yours, baby,” he once told you.

“I am. There’s nothing more I want in this world than to be your wife.” And that’s the real honest truth. Joel Miller loves hard - particularly you. His tenderness is only reserved for you and Sarah - his girls. You never expected to fall just as hard for him. You only ever heard of this type of love in romance novels; only dreamt of it. Somehow, he managed to tumble his way into your heart that day, literally, when he spilled his coffee on you that fateful morning. Before him, you never fathomed the thought of experiencing a love like this.

He has served you the world and more on a silver platter. His love is the warm sunshine that envelopes you on a beautiful spring day. It is the forest fire that roars higher when you fan the flames, engulfing you in his heart. Joel Miller is the color yellow, his love burning brighter than the stars in the sky. As you love him hard, he loves you harder. To be loved by him for eternity is the greatest gift anyone could ever receive. As long as you live, his love will never die, for you carry it in your heart, everywhere you go.

Look at the stars

Look how they shine for you

And all the things that you do

some moot tags: @nostalxgic @undrthelights @darkroastjoel @pedrospartner @ramblers-lets-get-ramblin @modernperplexity @mrsquill @breakfastatjoels @tinygarbage @sin-djarin @jenispunk 🩵

this was so fun to write! got a little sappy at the end, i told y’all i was in my feelings when i wrote this 🤣 i truly do love writing, i just get very in my head about everything. may or may not already be working on a meet-cute prequel for these two 🫣 hope y’all enjoyed this and thank y’all for reading! <3

#joel miller x reader #joel miller x f!reader #joel miller x female reader #joel miller #joel miller tlou #soft!joel miller #joel miller one shot #joel miller fluff #joel miller x you #joel miller smut #joel miller fanfiction #fic: yellow #one shot: yellow #yellow coldplay

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cinnamostar · 6 months

Text

02: home

part one.

pairing : minho x gn!reader

summary : “I have known you for thousands of lifetimes, and I don’t regret meeting you in a single one.”

wc : 7.3k

cw : childhood friends, arguing, angst, sadness, mentions of bullying + racism/xenophobia, best friends to lovers, fluff, sappiness, its so doooomed

a/n : pls read part one before this! i was in so much pain as i wrote this, so im sorry in advance, my dear reader. please let me know what you think! likes and reblogs appreciated

tags: @im-on-a-hellavator , @httpswilloww @atinyniki (its not letting me tag so i hope this works ;w;)

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Maybe that was a little too harsh, Minho thought to himself as he remembered your glassy eyes and the guilt that painted your face a depressing blue, the bashful glowing smile of yours he adored nowhere to be found. Oh, how his heart soared to the heavens when he saw you back at the pond you both once called home years later, the same vibrance you carried as a child seemed to have never left you even after so many years. How he missed seeing you smile so timidly, yet lovingly, at the tadpoles who swam underneath the pond's surface, how he missed seeing how breathtakingly beautiful you looked as the wind bellowed through your locks, and how he missed you.

It didn’t matter how many times the earth had rotated around the sun, it didn’t matter how long it had been, his heart could never let you go.

The instant he saw someone standing at the pond, his body and soul knew it was you, there was no way he’d ever mistake that nostalgic, comforting presence of yours as anyone else’s. The way the soft rays of the sun highlighted your features nearly made his heart skip out his chest, as if he just saw an angel standing before him; the cherub he once knew as a child had grown up.

How he hoped you’d finally come back home to him, how he desperately wished for years to relive the sweetest moments of his childhood, how he wished you were there for each and every milestone in life, and how he wished you two could finally make up for lost time. And while his heart yearned for you, the abandonment he felt in his childhood festered inside him, as if he had taken a swig of poison that sought to destroy the love and adoration he had for you in a bitter, resentful, rage. He couldn’t help it, the pain and misery he felt growing up had never truly left and your presence reawakened those wounds he never learned to heal. His heart stretched painfully in this twisted game of tug-of-war, unsure on whether he should feel thankful for your return or relent to the enmity that had rotted within him for god knows how long.

Yet, it was so easy to submit to the indignation he was feeling as it overpowered any sense of gratefulness, choosing to ignore the miracle of you being back as his mouth soured over the taste of resentment.

Had his prayers finally been answered? Has he finally wished you back into his life? I’m an idiot, he cringed as he began to regret his behavior. Maybe his anger wasn’t justified, maybe he should’ve met you with more grace. After all, you weren’t wrong, you were just a kid who knew no better. It wasn’t fair to him, but neither was his treatment to you after the fact. Ah. The guilt you must’ve felt over the years could not have been easy to manage on top of the stress of living in an entirely foreign country, as your tearful eyes showed him how much you had been agonizing over this. For so long, he had convinced himself you had forgotten him entirely, no longer cared for him as he mourned over you as if you had died, yet the years of the youth you both shared came rushing in like a tsunami the minute you both made eye contact. The overwhelming emotions of nostalgia and regret was a feeling only you two could ever understand, and my, was it complicated to choose how to feel with thousands of nameless emotions competing with one another.

The love Minho had for you never left, almost as if it laid dormant for years as it hoped for the day you two would meet again, the familiar butterflies of his childhood crush blossoming once again at the sight of you. Somehow, everything and nothing about you changed, it was something Minho didn’t have words to explain or couldn’t quite wrap his mind around. You were the Y/N he knew and doted on as a child, but you had grown into an astonishingly beautiful adult version of yourself and he found himself falling in love the instant his soul recognized you.

For so many years, Minho had tried his best to erase any memory of you, but his heart couldn’t deny the love it had for you and no matter how hard he tried, it was always you. Through the trials and tribulations of life, you were his safe haven, the very thought of you bringing a sense of peace and tranquility no other could, and during the lowest points of his life, his body always instinctually took him to the same pond as a refuge. He coveted you and your presence, yet the pond was the closest he could get to you and the feelings he had longed for.

Just maybe Minho was being unfair to you, he thought. After all, you both were just kids.

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Since your run in with Minho, you had been suffering with an overwhelming amount of guilt, carrying the weight of shame on your shoulders as you came face to face with him for the first time in years. Having to finally confront the pained and saddened expression he wore was something you could have never prepared for, and the very memory of it was enough to make you break down in tears.

You knew what you had done to Minho was extremely hurtful, and you couldn’t imagine what that must’ve felt like, no matter how hard you try. But knowing and witnessing it were two completely different things, and after seeing Minho’s watery eyes, you weren’t sure if you could ever forgive yourself. He was right, though. Maybe you shouldn’t have come back, maybe coming back was only reopening old wounds you both didn’t need to be dealing with all because of your selfish need to reconnect with your culture.

Though, after spending most of your life overseas, you were starting to feel like you didn’t belong in your home country anymore. You had lost touch with cultural traditions, basic etiquette, and even struggled to speak your native tongue as well. You still spoke like the eight year old that had moved away long ago, and it was becoming increasingly embarrassing as you compared yourself to everyone around you. You stuck out like a sore thumb and for the first time in your life, you began to realize you didn’t fit in anywhere. Not here, not in the states. You were too much of your ethnicity to be considered a proper American, and you were too American to be considered a true citizen of your country, despite spending the first eight years of your life here. Coming back home didn’t reaffirm your identity, but only left you more confused and questioning who you even were.

Minho was right, this was a mistake.

You so desperately craved a sense of belonging, and you became certain you weren't finding it here anymore, but you had to make it through the rest of your trip at the very least. You were just going to try to continue business as usual though, hoping you would not run into Minho again and would simply forgo the pond entirely. It should be simple enough, you thought. No one needed to know about your accidental meeting with Minho and you were sure he’d avoid you like the plague. It should be fine.

Well, that quickly changed as soon as your mom told you Minho’s mother invited your family to dinner at their house. The color from your face immediately drained as a cold sweat formed all over your body, your mother seemingly ecstatic at the news, “Oh, it will be just like old times! And you can finally see Minho after so long, isn’t that great, sweetheart?” she beamed, your father also nodding alongside her.

You cleared your throat as you forced a fake smile, “Yeah, that does sound great, mom. When are we going over?”

“Tonight! So make sure to be ready to walk over by seven, okay?”

Tonight? Oh, god, no, that was far too soon when you had just barely recovered from seeing Minho yesterday, and now tonight? Breathe, Y/N. Just one night, then you’ll never see him again, you ressaured yourself, trying to find a way to make this news manageable. You honestly should have seen this coming, your mom was also best friends with Minho’s mom, but for some reason that detail had escaped you.

Just one evening, just one dinner, then it would be all over, right?

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Dinner was going as well as it could have. Minho’s mother spent a great deal of effort preparing a feast for your family and she showered you with compliments as soon as you walked through the door, commenting how you had grown into such a lovely young adult.

Minho and you only exchanged an awkward hello, which didn’t raise any alarms in either of your parents as they somewhat expected this, especially considering how your friendship ended as children. Nonetheless, it did not stop the onslaught of questions each set of parents asked in attempts to catch up, nor did it stop them trying to force a conversation between you two.

“So, Y/N, how was university in the states? Did you like it there?” curiously inquired Minho’s father.

“Oh, it was great! Definitely got to meet some life long friends there and had lots of fun,” you politely responded, “I didn’t exactly live the typical all-american college experience, but it was still nice. Excited to start my new job once I get back though! I got a really good offer and the position I wanted.”

Minho’s mother gasped as she congratulated you, “That’s amazing! I remember your mother telling me how stressed you were about those interviews, but I’m glad you got it,” she then turned her head to Minho while giving him a slight nudge, “Minho also graduated, he got a job offer as well. Tell them about it, Minho.”

Minho awkwardly cleared his throat, “Uhm, yeah, I just got an offer with a bank here as an analyst, but I’m waiting to hear back from another company before negotiating.”

You nodded as he spoke, looking anywhere, but him as your parents also commended him, you weakly congratulating him as well. Wow, this felt painfully awkward, but somehow neither of your parents seemed to care too much about the tension between you two.

“How about a special someone, Y/N?” Minho’s dad asked, the question catching you by surprise. Your eyes landed on the boy who sat across from you, who looked just as surprised, but fully interested in your response.

“Ah, no, not right now… Kinda focused on myself for now,” you respond, a stiff smile on your face, feeling nervous under the sudden intensity of Minho’s gaze.

Your mother let out a chortle, finding your embarrassment endearing, “What about you, Minho? Any girlfriends?” she teased, wiggling her eyebrows as everyone else joined in laughing.

“Minho does have a girlfriend! It’s such a shame she couldn’t make it tonight, she was a lovely girl,” his mom piped, “Reminded me a bit of you, Y/N, if I’m being honest.”

You didn’t know why, but something inside you sank, an indescribable wave of disappointment washed over you at the words girlfriend. Of course he had one, he’s, well, an attractive, smart, man. Of course, but why were you so bothered by it? You haven’t spoken to him in years, you virtually had no relationship with him and only had remnants of the past to hold onto, yet your stomach began to twist and turn inside you, almost as if you were jealous? Ah, no, this is weird, this isn’t right. Maybe the food just isn’t sitting with you well, maybe you caught a stomach bug that just so happened to show its symptoms just in this moment.

The boy coughed, “We, uh… We broke up, that’s why she isn’t coming.”

Everyone stood in silence, not expecting that kind of news over dinner, both sets of parents shooting him an apologetic look, but for some reason, you felt relieved to hear that. The pit that was forming in your stomach suddenly vanished, as if Minho’s words just cured you of your ailment.

“What, you never told us!” Minho’s mother exclaimed.

“It was a few weeks ago, it happens. I’m fine, really.”

Maybe that explains the tired look in Minho’s eyes when you first saw him yesterday, maybe that explains the somber look he carried that day, and perhaps he went to the pond for a moment of peace, just as you did, except your very presence ruined it. There returned the familiar hand of guilt that rested its heavy hand on your shoulders, never giving you the chance to take a deep breath.

Beside that, dinner did move on relatively well as everyone took turns to catch up or reminisce on the olden days, all while gossiping about who was up to what. As dinner came to a close, both sets of parents decided it was best for you two to be left with washing the dishes alone in the house, as they moved to the patio area to chat amongst themselves.

Minho and you silently stood next to each other as he washed the dishes, handing them to you for them to dry with a rag, much as you two did while growing up. Although you two were much older, there was a comforting air that hung around you two that allowed you to relax the tension your body had been carrying over the dinner, humming a quiet tune as you dried each plate.

“You still hum while doing the dishes?” Minho asked, a small amused smile taking over his features.

You froze in place, not expecting him to willingly speak to you, much less take the time to ask you a question. “I guess I still do,” you replied lightly, afraid that the mere sound of your voice would somehow upset him.

A quiet lull returned after your response, neither of you knowing what to do or even say around another as guilt nibbled away at each of you, but for your own different reasons.

“I’m sorry.”

“I’m sorry”

You both turned to each other, eyes widened in surprise as you both rushed mumbled apologies to each other at the same exact time. Neither of you knew what to do in this unexpected situation, awkwardness filling both your eyes as you both struggled to stammer out a response.

“I… I’m sorry for never telling you I was leaving, I should’ve known bet-”

“No, no, we were both kids. Neither of us knew better. I’m sorry for being so… rude. I don’t know what got into me. I’m really sorry.”

“It’s okay,” you whispered anxiously, continuing to dry the glass cup in your hand, “It’s a lot to handle all at once. I don’t blame you one bit.”

“It really isn’t okay. We were both hurting in our own ways, I think we both did the best we could at the time,” he smiled reassuringly at you, the same one he had flashed you the first day he dragged you out to the forest to find the pond, a smile you had come to miss.

“Oh, and sorry about… your ex? Break ups suck…”

“It’s fine, I actually am glad we broke up… she was, well… it wasn’t great for either of us,” he mumbled, not willing to divulge any further, “Break ups suck? Sounds like you’ve had your fair share.”

You laugh lightly, “Unfortunately. Mine weren’t as peaceful as yours. You sound a lot happier than I was.”

“Well, you’ve always been a crybaby. Guess not much has changed about you, huh?” he mused, a teasing smirk forming on his face.

You rolled your eyes as you snorted, playfully nudging him with your hip, “Shut up. You’re still as annoying as I remember too.”

“I bet you missed it.”

“I did. A lot. Moving sucked.”

He handed you the last of the dishes to dry, deep in thought as he leaned his back against the kitchen counter, “Was it hard?”

You sighed as you put the last dish away, turning to him as you swallowed thickly, “I think I cried nearly every day for two years straight,” your gaze was stuck looking down at the floor as you fiddled with your fingers, “It was really hard. I didn’t have friends for a long time. No one understood me when I tried speaking English, and I didn’t understand the other kids a lot of the time, but I always knew they were laughing at me.”

Minho’s heart ached hearing how your voice slightly quivered as you recalled the memory, he could tell it was your first time ever saying any of it out loud. There was an icy sadness surrounding you as you spoke, yet no tears were to be found. Maybe you were good at hiding them, or maybe you had grown too tired to cry for your younger self at this point, but it didn’t take away from the scars the loneliness had left on your heart. “I’m sorry, Y/N. I should’ve been there for you.”

You shook your head, an exasperated laugh left you as a resigned smile took over your face, “It’s okay, it was years ago. I’ve learned to deal with it. Besides, I did end up making friends and I ended up learning how to speak English.”

Minho was amazed at your ability to force a cheerful expression while discussing something so traumatic, something he would have never expected you to be able to do. He couldn’t help but wonder what you had endured all these years on your own, wondering where the sensitive and delicate version of you he had once knew had gone, feeling angry that you had been hurt so much that your tenderness was forced to become a callous exterior.

The child he had once known was so fragile, he had to wear gloves when handling your porcelain heart, nervous his very own touch or breath could crack it if he wasn’t careful. Minho hated seeing you cry. He would defend you, fighting tooth and nail, like his life depended on it if anyone ever upset you, even going as far as angrily huffing and puffing at your parents if they ever raised their voice at you. And every time, he would comfort you right after in a gentle embrace until you calmed down, making sure to glare at anyone who tried to disturb your peace. How much did your little heart break over the years? Who was there to pick up the pieces and comfort you through those moments? Had you really dealt with it all by yourself? The thought alone made Minho’s heart writhe in despair, aching as he mourned this realization.

You reached out to grab Minho’s arm as you saw the downcast expression on his face, “Hey, it’s not your fault. I learned how to defend myself and I think I turned out pretty okay at the end of it,” you reassured before laughing, “Unless you think I’m lame now.”

Your laugh was enough to bring Minho out his incessant thoughts, a mischievous grin returning, “I never thought you were cool in the first place.”

“Minho!”

“Kidding, kidding. I’m just glad to have you back. I missed you lots.”

“I missed you too.”

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Over the past few days, you and Minho had become inseparable, spending nearly every minute of the day with one another, much like how you two did when you were children. For the first time in years, you finally felt that you belonged somewhere, no longer feeling out of place like you have since the day you moved away. It didn’t matter where you were, but as long as Minho was there, you felt like you were at home. He knew this too, he noticed the change from the first day he found you at the pond again to now. You were much more relaxed, as if all the worries in the world disappeared while you both were together, giggling over whatever stupid joke was made. You weren’t on edge as you were before, and the walls you had surrounded your heart with slowly crumbled away through his affections.

And even though over a decade has since passed since you two last spoke, it was as if time had paused since the moment you left, and only resumed from the day you both made up. Nothing has changed, except everything about the two of you changed. Your childhood friendship continued like it was nothing, playing like a song that had been paused, waiting to sing its tune, except you two were much older, more matured, and had experienced so much of life. Whatever you each went through shaped you into the adults you were today, yet the kids you each knew hid behind locked doors that only the two of you had accessed.

Yet, there was a more complicated matter that you had to address before it snowballed out of control. Your feelings. Love was never a word you and Minho shied away from, as you often told each other ‘I love you’ while growing up, it seemed natural during that time of childlike innocence. You knew you loved Minho, and you knew he loved you, but saying it as adults had an entirely implication and your feelings were indicating something much deeper than platonic love.

It was no secret that your childhood best friend had grown into a rather handsome man, and the childhood crush you once had on him was flourishing into something greater than just a crush. The smallest of gestures would send a frenzy of butterflies and warmth rushing throughout your veins, hoping to god Minho had not noticed just how much of an effect he was having on you.

If you two were walking through a crowded area, he’d grab your hand without hesitation as he led you through the swarms of people. If you had food stuck on the corner of your lips, he’d grab a napkin and wipe it off. If you saw a small trinket at the shopping mall you wanted, the very next day he’d come back with the item in hand, saying he bought it so you could remember to text or call him when you went back to the states. It was moments like those that felt so incredibly intimate to you, but part of you wasn’t sure if it could all be explained away by how comfortable you two were with one another.

And here you were again, sitting on the couch of Minho’s living room after he had begged you to watch a new scary movie with him, insisting this was to make up for the pre-teen years you both missed out on and that he would’ve forced you to watch one then. You tried to protest, saying that you guys weren’t kids anymore and there was no need for these ‘tests of bravery,’ yet you couldn’t resist the way he would pout and whine, begging you to do so for him just like he would as a child.

You were barely watching the movie, just peeking out from behind a blanket as Minho’s secure arm wrapped around your shoulders, your head laying on his chest as you cowered in fear over the pure suspense of the movie. Each time you’d flinch, you could feel a soft rumble come from Minho’s chest, doing his best to stifle a laugh and hide the fact that he was enjoying every moment of this.

“I fucking hate you,” you scowled, still recovering from the last jumpscare.

Minho giggled at your face, finding your attempt to look upset absolutely adorable, “No, you don’t,” reaching his other arm over you as he squeezed you into an affectionate embrace, “It’s not my fault you’re still a giant baby after all these years.”

You grumbled while doing your best to shove Minho off you, but there was no way you’d be able to overpower him. You’ve hugged Minho so many times throughout your life, but this time, it sent your heart racing so loud that you could hear it drumming in your own ears, silently praying that he couldn’t hear it too. Something about this hug felt different, especially when he kept you close in his arms, refusing to let you go as he snuggled into you. This trip was going to be the death of you.

Without fail, every time you jolted in your seat, Minho was quick to chuckle at each of your reactions and tighten his grip on you gently, not skipping a beat to plant a chaste kiss on your forehead while whispering to you that it was just a movie. If you were two kids, this would be something normal and innocent, but right now, it left you feeling like a flustered mess who was melting under the heat of his affection.

You were slowly feeling yourself short-circuit, your body starting to sweat from the heat of embarrassment that was washing over you. Surely, Minho would feel the amount of warmth emanating from you at this point, yet he seemed completely unbothered as his eyes were trained on the movie ahead of you. You were relieved that he seemed aloof to the distress you were experiencing, but also mildly insecure that he seemed so… relaxed despite the proximity you two shared. Maybe he had only seen this under the same childhood innocence and nothing more, maybe it was only you making a big fuss over this.

It was becoming too much for you to bear as you started to shift uncomfortably, slowly getting up while excusing yourself to the bathroom. Minho’s eyebrows furrowed with concern, “Are you okay?”

You nodded your head hastily as you made your way to the bathroom, “Uhm, yeah! Just not feeling well suddenly, not sure why. Just gonna splash some water on my face.”

He didn’t seem too convinced, he could sense there was something more to it, but decided to let it go. You raced to the bathroom, shutting the door behind you to finally catch a breath, shaking your hands as if you were trying to remove all the nervous energy out of you. Your face was hot to the touch, thankful for the cold water from the faucet as you splashed it onto your warm cheeks. You weren’t sure how much time had passed, but it was long enough for Minho to come knocking at the door, “Y/N? Is everything okay?”

You swung the door instantly, startling Minho as he backed up from the door, his eyebrows raised at your change in behavior, “What’s wrong? Don’t lie to me, I can tell something’s up.”

Minho’s eyes narrowed as he looked into yours, trying to search your eyes for an answer as you bit the inside of your cheek, your eyes entirely avoiding him, “It’s nothing, I’ll be fine-”

“Y/N.”

“I promise, I’m probably just overreacting, Minho. I’ll be fine.”

He stared down at you with his arms crossed, pursuing his lips as he watched the corners of your lips twitch, a telltale sign that you were lying, “Am I making you uncomfortable? Was the movie too much for you? You know you can tell me anything.”

You shook your head panickedly, “No, no, it’s nothing like that, I swear! Don’t worry about it.”

“Y/N.”

You gulped, you knew there was no way out of this. Minho knew you better than anyone else, he knew you weren’t randomly feeling ill over nothing, he knew it had nothing to do with the movie.

“I really don’t wanna talk about it, Minho. It’s okay.”

“Okay, we don’t have to talk about it, but can you at least tell me if it has anything to do with me?”

The stubbornness you found charming as a child was definitely an absolute pain in the ass as the adult man in front of you analyzed every microscopic detail you, trying his best to get to the bottom of what had you acting strangely. You couldn’t lie to him, no, he would know as soon as you opened your mouth it was a lie. Sure, you could tell him he was the cause of your unsettledness, but would that even go well? There were too many factors to consider, too much to think about and your long pause told Minho everything he needed to know.

He sighed, taking a step back as he started to make his way back to the living room, “It’s fine, I can tell. If this is too much, we can stop here. We can talk about it tomorrow morning.”

“N-no!”

The words flew out your mouth before you had the chance to even think. Oh, you were mentally cursing at yourself as Minho turned to you again, his face furrowed with confusion, “No?”

“I just… I mean, it’s just a lot, but it isn’t at the same time?” you sounded so unsure as you said it, which only caused Minho to tilt his head to the side as he tried to understand you.

“It’s too much, but it isn’t…” he mumbled to himself, his mind straining to figure out the riddles you were speaking, “I know I said we don’t have to talk about it, but you do realize you’re not making any sense, right?”

You forced a tight-lipped smile, inhaling sharply, “Uhm, yeah… It doesn’t make sense to me either.”

“You’re lying. You know exactly what you mean, you just don’t want to tell me.”

You winced at his bluntness, not really surprised at how direct he was being with you, “Do you not trust me anymore?”

His eyes glossed over with insecurity and worry as he asked that question, your heart dropping immediately, wanting nothing more than shoo those feelings away, “What? Of course I still trust you.”

“Then why can’t you tell me?”

“Because it’s complicated?”

“But why?”

“Why can’t you just drop it?” you raised your voice in frustration at his insistence, not willing to budge as he tried to pry his way into your mind.

“Well,” he hesitated, “The last time you hid something from me, you left. So forgive me for being a little scared.”

Your mouth dropped open at Minho’s statement, not expecting him to be so vulnerable with you out of nowhere, “I… Minho, I’m sorry,” you whispered tearfully, your stomach flipping onto itself as it digested the grief Minho had just voiced. You stepped towards him, reaching for his hands as you clasped them between yours, “I’m sorry, it’s just… I don’t really know if I should be saying this.”

“Trust me this time, please? I don’t want to be left in the dark again,” he pleaded, his mind reminding him of the day he waited for you as the amber sunset turned into the night sky.

Your hands started to tremble in his, your nerves taking over as you unexpectedly found yourself about to confess your feelings to a man who lived thousands miles from you, a man you had only started talking to a few days ago, a man who had somehow known you your entire life, despite missing so many crucial years together. Your breath hitched as the butterflies in your stomach got caught in your throat, your nerves signaling off as the electrifying feeling of adrenaline took over, “I, uh… I am really happy we’ve made up, I’m really happy to have rekindled our friendship with one another, and I’ve loved all the time we have spent with each other over the last few days, but…”

Trepidation ran through you, biting your lip for a brief moment as you hesitated to continue your sentence, “Maybe I’ve come to love it a little too much?” At this point, you were looking for every way possible to avoid saying your actual feelings, hoping Minho would connect the dots for you, but his face told you he had no idea what you meant. “Okay, you don’t have to tell me I’m still not making sense, I can see it in your face,” you sighed. He nodded, urging you to continue with patient eyes.

“I… like you?”

It was quiet, so quiet you swore both Minho and you could hear your heart thumping, your hands clamming up as you held his, terrified eyes examining his face for his reactions. He stilled for a moment, as if he was processing your words before breaking out into a grin, a hearty laugh escaping him.

“I already knew that.”

You froze in place, disbelief painting your face as you stared at him incredulously, “What?”

“Don’t tell me you’re also still clueless after all these years,” yet he took your silence as confirmation, shaking his head as he giggled, “Do you really think I was being overly affectionate with you for no reason?”

Your mouth dried up from nerves, stuttering over your reply, “I… Yes? I thought you were just… I don’t know, I thought you were just treating me the same way you did as when we were kids.”

“And do you know why I treated you like that growing up?” he questioned with a candied smile.

You blinked slowly, your head shaking cautiously as you tried to decipher his words, “Because… I don’t know? We were best friends.”

“Sure, that was part of it, but it was more like me having a giant crush on you.”

“...”

“... That means I still like you, if that wasn’t clear enough for you.”

There was no way this was real, this all had to be a dream, you just couldn’t believe your ears. Your childhood crush, the man that caused our feelings to go absolutely haywired in a matter of a few days, felt the same exact way for you this whole time and you just somehow missed it? No, no, this was certainly a dream, why on earth would he be into someone like you, someone who-

“Y/N,” he removed his hands from yours, resting them on top of your shoulders as he leaned down to come face to face with you, effectively waking you up from your reverie, “Let’s make up for lost time,” he whispered, his breath fanning on your lips, “Can I kiss you?”

You stared back with doe eyes, all your vocabulary escaping you as you gulped, nodding your head perhaps a little too excitedly. Minho’s smile only widened at your reaction, his rough hands traveling to cup your face with half-lidded eyes, his head leaning forward as his chapped lips closed the gap. His lips melded against yours, your hands grasping at his t-shirt as you felt your knees buckle under him, clinging onto him as if your life depended on it. You felt yourself weaken under his touch, becoming prisoner to his affection as the world around you quieted, much like the moment of silence that existed between the end of a performance and explosive applause of the audience. Everything stalled, as if the expanse of the universe took a pause and the supernovas’ violent bursts slowed to witness feverish kiss between you two. You were becoming lightheaded, pulling away from the dizzying kiss as your chests heaved in an attempt to catch your breath. Minho’s cheeks and ears burned a bright scarlet, a sweet smile grazing his features as his eyes brimmed with love and affection, softly whispering:

“I love you.”

“I love you too.”

｡ﾟ•┈୨♡୧┈• ｡ﾟ

Once again, the familiar, low, hum of mosquitos filled your ears as Minho’s firm hand led you down the same dirt trail you’ve traveled down hundreds of times, leaves brushing against the skin of your arms as you cautiously followed his grasp. Today, Minho told you he had one last surprise for you before you traveled back home, blindfolding you at the entrance of the forest as butterflies fluttered in your stomach, temporarily distracting you from the fact that this was your last day here before returning to the states, returning to your mundane life and leaving this mind numbing summer romance behind.

He slowed down his pace, signaling to you that you had arrived to your destination, his hands slipping out of yours as you felt his presence behind you, gently removing the blindfold as he softly whispered, “we’re here.”

As soon as the blindfold was off, your eyes blinked rapidly as they adjusted to the change of lighting, scanning the scene that stood ahead of them as Minho made his way into your vision, a saccharine smile beaming at you, “Do you like it?”

Like was an understatement as a grin broke out onto your face, your heart filling with an overwhelming amount of adoration as you took in the surprise Minho spent so long preparing for earlier this morning. There, beside the pond, laid a small plaid blanket with a picnic basket centered atop of it, a bouquet of your favorite flowers and a bottle of wine propped up against the basket. You gasped with delight as your heart softened, “Oh, Minho, I love it.”

His shoulders relaxed at your words, no longer feeling nervous as he grabbed your hand and guided you to the blanket, sitting down next to you as he gingerly laid out the food he prepared in front you. “I made you some of your favorites,” he added, gently opening the bottle of wine and pouring you a glass, “I hope its as good as it looks,” he laughed anxiously, handling you a small bento box with the a serving cutely prepared, the vegetables cut out into small hearts decorating the rice. You took a bite of the food as soon as you had the chance, a small moan escaping you due to how delicious it was, your eyes widening in surprise, not expecting it to be so flavorful, “Minho, this is so good, you made this?”

He proudly nodded, pride bubbling up within him as you complimented the meal he made for you, one where he spent an agonizing amount of time to make because it just had to be perfect for you, especially today of all days, a day he wanted to send you off with the happiest memories.

You both continued to enjoy the date Minho had put so much effort in, occasionally teasing one another or chuckling at whatever lame joke the other made, both of you trying to avoid the looming topic at hand, the inevitable ending of this summer love story that was doomed to last for only a few weeks.

“So…” Minho anxiously drawled, “You’re leaving tomorrow…”

You smiled weakly as you cleared your throat, “That I am.”

He pursed his lips, struggling to ask the question you both knew you needed to address, “So… what does it mean for us?”

A heavy sigh escaped you as the tension in the air thickened, both of you intently staring at one another, trying to decode what the other was thinking before speaking, “What do you want it to mean?”

“I asked you first,” he responded a little too fast for your liking, not willing to voice his thoughts without hearing yours first.

“Well, uhm…” you paused, debating with your mind and heart as you decided your next words, “I am going back to the states, back to my friends, back to my job, back to my life.”

“Right,” he mumbled with a crestfallen expression, “Your life is there, not here.”

“It is.”

“What about me?” he whispered in a quivered voice.

“Well, your life is here, my life is not here. I don’t really…” you took a deep breath, tears starting to prick your eyes, “I don’t know how we would work.”

He nodded tearfully, knowing he couldn’t deny the difficulty of managing a long distance relationship, especially one like this, “What if I moved with you? What if you moved back?”

You shook your head, your heart breaking at Minho’s attempts to find a solution, “Minho, you don’t even speak English, you wouldn’t be able to find a job there and use your degree-”

“I can learn! I promise, I’ll start studying-”

“Minho.”

He stopped mid-sentence, his stubbornness refusing to let him accept the reality you two had found yourselves in, “Minho, you already have a job offer here, your friends and family are here. You wouldn’t be happy in the states, it’s so hard living there as a foreigner.”

“I’d be happy anywhere as long as I’m with you,” he begged, praying you’d at least try to see the glimmer of hope he was trying to conjure up, “I don’t care where, as long as I’m with you, I’d be happy.”

You bit your lip as you tried to suppress a sob, “You know that’s not true, you know your happiness can’t be dependent on me alone.”

“You don’t want to come back here?”

“I… can’t, Minho. My life isn’t here anymore, it hasn’t been in years.”

Crystal tears fell from Minho’s eyes, his eyes no longer being able to meet yours as the your words crushed his soul, the love he felt for you expelling into his tears as he began to mourn your loss once more, sobbing much like he did all those years ago. Through hiccups, he blubbered “Please, Y/N. Please don’t leave me again.”

You squeezed your eyes shut as you sniffled, no longer being able to watch the man you love completely fall apart in front of you, cursing yourself for your cruel words that stabbed over and over again in his bleeding heart. “I’m so sorry, Minho. I don’t want this either, but what choice do we have? You and I both know our lives would never cross paths, we would never be able to come together.”

“We can try-”

“For what? To only cry years later to have this same exact conversation again?” you snapped, your frustrated tears and guilty conscience no longer being able to handle his pleading, it only wounding you more. You’ve already spent the past few weeks trying to scour for a possibility, a fragment of hope that showed you a timeline in which you two would be happy together, but it simply didn’t exist in this life, no matter how many times you flipped and turned the story. This wasn’t a movie, this wasn’t some romance novel where love would triumph it all, this was the bitter and harsh realities of life, and you hated it with all your heart.

You let out a despondent sigh as you lamented over the situation, your hands gingerly reaching out for Minho’s chin, forcing his teary-eyed face to look at yours, “Minho, I’m sorry, baby.”

He sniffled, his nose reddening as hot drops cascaded down his cheeks, “I’m sorry too.”

“I love you with everything in me, Minho, and I always will no matter where life takes us,” you murmured heartbrokenly, “I have known you for thousands of lifetimes, and I don’t regret meeting you in a single one.”

His hands reached out to hold yours, removing them from his face as he grasped them tightly, as if he was fearing you’d fade away if he loosened his grip, “I just wish we worked in this one,” he trembled.

“Me too, but…” you heaved, “Maybe in the next one, right? You’ll find me again?”

He laughed melancholily, “Always. I’d chase you to the very end of the universe if I had to.”

“Kiss me one more time? So I don’t forget?”

He smiled with anguished eyes, not hesitating to tilt his head as his lips captured yours once more, in one last, passionate kiss with all the devotion in the world, leaving the taste of your bittersweet love, one where only the two of you would know and understand.

You were leaving him again, but at least he got to say goodbye this time.

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bamsara · 1 year

Text

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH

Sorry I hope this isn't too sappy but I wanted to write a big thank you to everyone that came to stream last night and just abosultely obliterated me with kindness and support

For folks who weren't in stream: I had planned on setting up a commission thing on kofi to start tomarrow (today, now, but a day after this chaos event) to raise money to buy myself a christmas gift of a Switch, planned on clearing out a whole few days to try and earn money, but after figuring out to make a goal post thing on the KoFi page and on stream I decided to save from posting commission listings until I had a full day to sit down and stream it all since I had something else planned in the middle of the day

I did an art stream later in the day and let me tell you I was *floored* by kindness and people were just being so nice and im aughsdglhsdsdgsds. Not only did we meet the Kofi Goal, BUT THEY KEPT GOING. I'm scared to look at the total amount and I plan on refunding some folks when they're not looking because I feel so bad because tbh I haven't deserved or rightfully earned the amount of generosity given to me but I just wanted to say like, holy shit. Thank you? Thank you oh my goodness

I HAVE A SWITCH NOW. AND SOME GAMES. Animal Crossing and Monster Hunter: Rise to start. I've played Monster Hunter before so it's a love of mine but Animal Crossing is something Ive only gotten to play the free pocket camp phone version of, and watch videos of, so I'll have to learn the woes and wins of that game and I'm super excited!! And I'll be able to play online with people too holy shit

If you were in stream then you already know but if you werent or maybe tapped out early then I tried to caluclate and make a list of people who wanted doodles for what they donated, and the amount to my old commission list (sorry I haven't updated my examples in 2 years) and I plan on drawing doodles for the large donators and the folks who really just slammed me with love. I have some drawings to post already! If you see me drawing something on stream and finish it and not post it pls remind me because Im REALLY bad at that

Also I promised chat that I wouldn't open the Switch box until I did it with them so we can do that later tonight when I get fully home, but YEAH!

Anyway THANK YOU. I'm not the best with words but oh my god THANK YOU

#sara shush #pls ignore me yelling sldkghsdl #ok back to queueing up normal posts for people

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amica-aenigmata-naboo · 6 months

Text

Endlessly - Part 2

Astarion x plus size! Y/N - drabble - 3.1K WC

Masterlist

Warnings: fluff, like oh my god so much fluff, smut, intimacy, boundaries, Astarion being a consent king, sappy af, so much love its disgusting, I really am a slutty romantic writing this shit

Part 1

-----------------------

Astarion held your hand as you walked along the shore. He loved sunsets, as did you. You both stopped, watching as the sun slowly slipped behind the horizon. Baldur’s Gate could be seen off in the distance. He gave your cheek a quick peck before squeezing your hand.

“Can I try something?” you asked nervously but with a beaming smile on your face. It had been a few weeks since your discussion about intimacy and boundaries. He never pushed you, he never tried anything, he never forced you. You felt so lucky to have someone so understanding. With that understanding came want. You wanted him to feel you, to touch you. That awful voice in your head is ever present, but when you were with him, it’s like it all faded away.

“Of course darling.” he smiled at you, turning to face you. A curious and excited gleam rested in his scarlet eyes.

You stepped closer to him, pulling his hands to your hips. You sucked in a breath when his palms rested on you, he smoothed his thumbs over a few times in reassurance. You let his hands go, wrapping your arms around his neck. You pulled him closer, your bodies resting against one another.

Astarion could feel the slight tremble in your body when you pressed against each other. “Are you alright love? We can stop…” he wanted you to feel comfortable, and elated as he was to be holding you, none of that mattered if you didn’t completely want it.

You tightened your grip on him, nestling your head in the crook of his neck and closing your eyes as your breathed him in. He always smelt so good, he smelt like home. “I like this… just nervous…” you mumbled.

Astarion slowly tightened his grip on you, giving you ample time to stop him or pull away. He rested his head on top of yours, swaying you both back and forth slightly. “About what little love?” he asked.

You swallowed nervously, not wanting to sound dumb. “I just… you can feel my stomach against you…” you pulled away a bit, verbalizing the nasty thought made you want to put distance between the two of you.

Astarion pulled away too, his hands now just resting on your hips like before. “I didn’t even think of that… Are you alright? Do you want to stop?”

Why did he have to be so sweet? You smiled at him “No, I can’t let the thoughts win… did you… like it?” your fingers played with the curls at the base of his neck nervously.

Astarion smiled before kissing you gently. One hand coming to hold your face, the other pulling you back into him by your hip. You let out a little squeak, purely surprised - and admittedly a little turned on. He was so smooth, so intentional. There was no room to question his feelings towards you because he made them known. You let your hands fall from his neck. One holding his face, the other resting on his broad chest. He pulled away after a moment, both of you needing air. He leaned his forehead against yours.

“You are divine…” you whispered, thumb tracing his lower lip.

“You are mine…” he whispered back, kissing you briefly once more.

----------------------------------

Days passed and you couldn’t get the thought of how you felt on the beach with Astarion out of your mind. Everywhere he touched made you feel electrified. The nagging voice in your head was snuffed out when you talked to him, when he touched you. You wanted more, all you had to do was ask for it. But you didn’t know where to go from here. This was uncharted waters.

Astarion broke you out of your trance when he walked into your tent. “Are you alright my dear? You look troubled.” he sat down with you, holding your hand.

You smiled at him before looking back down. “I’m alright my love… I just… I’m confused, I suppose.” you sucked in a breath, collecting your thoughts. “On the beach, when you touched me… I felt so happy, so… excited. I want you to touch me again, I’m just not sure where. Or how. I haven’t done… anything super intimate with another before.” your cheeks were burning and you were on eggshells waiting for his response.

“I’m honored, my sweet. But we don’t have to immediately dive into things like sex. I was overjoyed to just hold you. Whatever you want, we can do.” Astarion kissed the back of your hand.

You took a breath before guiding his hand to your chest. You placed his palm flat over your heart, holding it there for a moment.

“Your hearts beating so fast…” he whispered.

“It does this whenever I’m with you…” you chuckled. You slowly moved his hand downwards so he was caressing your chest. Your heart was going so fast you feared it might stop. You pushed yourself up onto your knees. Astarion watched you with big eyes, anticipating your next move. You moved your legs apart and straddled him. His hands made their way to your hips. That familiar electricity spread across your skin when he touched you. You hovered over him not wanting to crush him.

“Sit.” he said.

Your eyes drooped with anxiety, “I don’t want to crush you.”

“Sit, pet.” his low seductive voice sending a shiver down your spine. You cautiously did as he asked. “Perfect.” he said darkly as he squeezed the flesh of your hips.

You kept your hands on top of his, gingerly moving them from your hips to your thighs. “Can I tell you something darling?”

You nodded, still trying to regulate your erratic heart.

“I’ve always loved your thighs. They're so plush, so soft. This right now is a dream come true.”

You let out a laugh, “You’re so sappy.”

Astarion smiled brightly, he shrugged before lifting a hand to your face “May I kiss you?”

You answered him by closing the space between you. The kiss started sweet and gentle but quickly turned into a heavy make out session. You moved his hands from your thigh and hip to rest them on your backside. He let out a moan that warmed a fire in your belly. He squeezed the supple flesh, swallowing the moan you let out. As delicious as this was, it had to end. Your legs started to hurt and you didn’t want this moment to escalate.

You pulled away, catching your breath so your chest would stop heaving. “Is it ok if we stop?”

“Of course my sweet, are you alright?” you could see panic building in his eyes.

“Positively heavenly.” you assured him, leaning your forehead against his for a moment before kissing him quickly and climbing off his lap. Your knees popped with relief. “Can I stay with you tonight?” You hadn't slept in each other's tents before. You would have thought you’d given him the world with his bright reaction.

“I would like nothing more, my precious.” He laid down, opening his arms to you.

-----------------------------

You sprinted to the front of camp as best you could. Orin had taken Astarion in the night, everyone else in camp went to save him. You had to remain, much to your objection, due to a horrifically broken ankle you managed to get yesterday after messing around with Karlach. As soon as Astarion’s eyes hit yours he limped over to you. You two engulfed each other in a tight hug. Your tears hit his neck and you let out a relieved sob.

“Are you ok?” you questioned, pulling back and running your eyes over him.

Astarion held your face in his hands before kissing your cheeks, “Fantastic, now that I’m with you.”

You let out a watery laugh, kissing his lips. There was so much love behind this kiss. The thought of losing each other seeping into it. “Let’s get you cleaned up.” you said.

He nodded, walking towards his tent. You quickly hugged your companions, thanking them each for saving him. When you opened Astarion’s tent he was shirtless, picking up a bucket to go fetch water for his bath. You took the bucket from him, shaking your head. He looked at you confused, but watched you anyway. You cast a spell, creating water and filling the tub up. You took a pouch from your pack that you left in his tent. Small glowing beads of iridescent orange rested inside it, you plucked out three and tossed them in the tub. The water sizzled, steam starting to rise from it. An herbal scent filled the tent. Astarion quirked an eyebrow at you.

“Day drops - from the eternal fire in Avernus. I’ve found they make a wonderful bath supplement.” you ran your fingers over the water, it was perfect. “I’ll leave you to it.” you said, blushing as Astarion undid the laces of his pants.

“You could stay… if you’d like…” he said, looking at you hopefully.

“Are you comfortable with that?”

Astarion smiled and nodded. After all this time and after telling you incessantly that you could touch him, see him. His heart never failed to stutter when you checked in with him. Nobody had ever been so caring, so gentle with him. He adored you, he loved you.

You picked up a sponge and a stool before walking back over to him. He settled in the small tub, letting his head fall back with a sigh. The water had a soft warm glow, shimmering slightly. What you neglected to tell him about the day drops is that they heal. They heal wounds, they heal illness, they heal heartache, they heal just about anything you could think of. They filled you with warmth, happiness, a feeling of completeness. You cleaned him up, gently scrubbing away the dried blood and dirt. His pale skin returned to its porcelain glory.

He watched you through half lidded, hazy eyes. “I love you.”

You stilled, leaning in to kiss him “I love you.” you said on his lips before kissing him again.

You dropped the sponge in the bucket, he was clean now he was just enjoying the water. You rested your head on the side of the tub, you watched him. He was so beautiful, so perfect. You reached out tracing over him. Starting at his face, then his neck, then his chest, then his stomach. You faltered when you reached his hips, not even fully realizing your arm was in the water and you were inching closer to a highly intimate place. You looked up, meeting Astarion’s eyes as they were already on yours.

“I’m sorry…” you said, flustered. You started to pull your hand away but Astarion caught your wrist. He brought it to his lips, kissing it softly and holding your hand.

“You’re alright darling. If you want me, you have me.” he kissed your wrist again before dropping your hand, letting you decide what happened next.

Your heart raced but you wanted to feel him so badly. You wanted to make him feel good. You dipped your hand back into the water, ghosting your hand over his hip bone before reaching between his legs and touching him where he wanted you most. You watched his face, pacing yourself based on how he responded to each tug, swipe, caress.

“You are… surprisingly good at this for somebody who hasn’t done it before.” he breathed out teasingly.

“I said I was a virgin, not a nun.” you joked back to him, picking up speed.

He leaned forward, pulling you into a kiss. It was romantic, not quite rough but not quite gentle either. It was longing. He kissed you until his breath picked up, moans spilling from him along with broken curses. You kissed him one last time before his hips jutted forwards and he let out a loud, strangled moan. You pleased him a bit more until his hand took yours.

“So…” you said with a blush across your face.

“Wonderful, little love, wonderful… could I return the favor?” he asked with curious eyes.

A nervous pit formed in your stomach but only for a moment, “I don’t think I’m ready for that yet…” you whispered before kissing his cheek.

He nodded, understanding completely. “When you are ready, know I will give you pleasure that would make the Gods jealous.” he winked at you.

You gulped, feeling that pit of fire in your belly reignite and trickle between your legs.

-------------------------------

Astarion pushed you against the door as soon as it shut. Your hands flew to his face, bringing him into a crushing kiss. He kissed you so deeply, it dizzied you. You had been teasing him all day, apparently he’d had enough.

“I want you but…” you looked down, sighing.

“What is it little love?” Astarion said sweetly.

“I don’t want to have to reciprocate… that sounds so selfish…” you cringed a bit.

“Darling that is perfectly fine, one shouldn’t give pleasure if all they want is reciprocation.” he kissed down your neck slowly, savoring you.

“I want you.” you said again, almost whining.

He nodded, kissing over your chest. He tugged at the hem of your pants before slipping his hand inside your small clothes. You gasped when he touched you, melting into him instinctually. You shuddered as he pleased you, touching you expertly. His other hand, running across your chest teasingly. He nipped at your neck playfully.

“Bite me.” you breathed out.

Astarion kissed over your pulsepoint before sinking his fangs into you. He took shallow gulps, wanting to drag this perfect moment out. You whined and shook when his fingers found your sweet spot, coming undone. He overstimulated you until you were a babbling mess. He attacked your neck and chest slowly kissing downwards. He noticed you tensed the closer he got to your stomach.

He brought himself back to your lips, “Relax… let me love you.”

You nodded, still reeling from the pleasure you just received. He kissed his way back down hungrily, tugging your small clothes all the way off before he put his mouth on your sex. You had never felt anything like this. So overwhelmed with pleasure that you couldn’t string a simple sentence together. His tongue moved over your sensitive spot making you jolt. He focused there until you came undone on his tongue.

“Gods you’re beautiful.” he said breathlessly. He climbed back up to you. You kissed him lightly, you felt so peaceful. You moved to the bed, legs shaking slightly. Astarion smiled proudly to himself.

-----------------------------

Cazador was gone. Finally, he was free. You rushed to him as he wept. Taking him in your arms, whispering reassurance and affirmations to himself. You kissed his cheeks when his cries turned into soft hiccups.

“It’s over. You’re free.” you kissed his lips quickly.

Astarion chased your lips, kissing you again. “I love you.” he whispered.

“Endlessly.” you smiled. “Let’s go home.” you helped him stand, holding him the whole way back to camp. You cleaned each other off, sharing few words. You didn’t want to overwhelm him, you let him come to you in order to give him space. You laid down first, ready for bed. Astarion joined you soon after. He pulled you close to him, hand on your hip moving to your ass. You chuckled lightly, throwing your leg over his waist, getting even closer to him. You kissed him deeply. He gripped you tight, wanting to get lost in you.

“You’ve had a long day… Are you sure you want to?” you asked when his lips encased your nipple.

“I’m free, this is exactly where I want to be.” he said, blowing cold air onto your nipple, watching as it perked before moving to the other to give it the same treatment.

“I want.. All of you.” you said quietly, feeling ready but nervous.

He stopped moving, looking up at you with lust filled eyes. “Are you sure?”

“Positive.” you shook your head as you let out a shaky breath.

His hands made their way under your shirt, pulling it off slowly. You crossed your arms over your chest and stomach, feeling overly exposed. He kissed your cheek slowly pulling your arms away as he laid you flat.

“Perfection.” he said as his hands ran over your sides, spreading tingles across your skin. He tugged your pants and small clothes off, leaving you bare.

“I feel unfairly exposed.” you laughed awkwardly.

“Come get what you want then.” he smirked.

You pulled him to you by his collar, ripping his shirt from him. You felt over him, savoring every ripple. You shoved his pants down the best you could, so focused on kissing him and feeling him. He kicked them off the rest of the way, his cock springing free. You could feel him against you. You whimpered as he teased you with his hand, getting you ready.

“If you want to stop, just say the word.” he said, rubbing himself against you.

You groaned at the friction, nodding incessantly. He moved inside you, going slowly so as to not hurt you. It felt… different. But not unwelcome. After a moment, he hit a spot inside you that made you quiver. He slowly began pumping in and out, hitting it over and over again.

“Faster.” you moaned out.

He did as you asked. His hand fondled your chest while his lips found purchase wherever they could. You felt so good you thought you might be dying, how else would a body feel this otherworldly? You kissed and nipped at his neck in between stringing curses together. Lava filled your veins, you felt a rush of euphoria. Everything started shaking, you let out moan after moan. Astarion came undone quickly after you. His pace was sloppy and waning. He kissed over you as he stilled.

His eyes met yours, “Are you alright?” he asked, kissing your cheek. He moved, picking up a rag from his nearby pack. He gently cleaned you up, careful not to stimulate your exhausted body anymore.

You sucked in a few more shallow breaths, “I walk amongst the gods with how heavenly I feel.” You kissed him when he came back to the bedroll, discarding the rag. He handed you his canteen, encouraging you to drink something. You pulled your pack to you, retrieving a pouch containing fruit, cheese, and jerky. You each fed each other, whispering amongst yourselves deep into the night.

“I love you.” you said as you felt yourself starting to drift off against his chest, the blanket warming you to the point of max comfort.

Astarion kissed your forehead, pulling you closer. “Endlessly, little love.”

-------------------------

Naboo's Note:

Ahhhhhhhhhh this was so fun to write!! Kinda challenging, didn't have a lot of motivation but wanted to give you guys part two before the weekend. I hop you all like it, its one of my longer pieces. Love you all, thank you for the support! Thanks for the likes, comments, reblogs, and requests!! Talk soon!! XOXOXOXO

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borathae · 2 years

Text

“Jungkook gets anxious sometimes. And when that happens, he needs your affection more than anything.”

Pairing: CEO!Jungkook x f.Reader

Warnings: anxious Kook, tears, he sucks on her boobs but it’s not even an ounce of sexual

Wordcount: 1.3k

a/n: I couldn’t get the concept of Kookie sucking on her boobs for comfort out of my head so here it is. This is pure comfort and fluff. Also this is very sappy, because I reread some of their chapters and got sappy af about how far they’ve come :( have fun besties ❤

Jungkook worked really late today. So late in fact, that you were already asleep when he came home. You often are with his schedule. You really hate those days. They leave him stressed, tired and sometimes even anxious. And there is no thing on earth you despise more than knowing that your Bunny had a bad day. You already hated it back when you still pretended that he was nothing more than business and you especially hate it these days as his loving wife. It makes you want to protect him from everything and everyone. You want to set the whole world on fire whenever he is feeling cold. You want to darken the sun whenever his eyes hurt because of it. And you would especially love to demolish his company whenever he had a bad day because of it. Truly, if anything or anyone bothered your Jungkookie in any kind of way, your desire for protective violence is raging.

So when a weak hand shakes you awake that night, followed by a little sniffle, you jolt up ready to fight the world. Not that one can see that you are, as your eyes open comically slowly in sleepiness. But you really are ready to fight the world.

Jungkook is barely visible in the darkness, only the weak shine of his nightlight illuminates him. He uses the light whenever you are sleeping already to find his way to bed and then apply lip balm and hand cream. Tonight it seems that he is using it to see you as well.

He is pouting. His eyes are puffy and wet from tears and his nose is runny too.

"What's wrong?" you ask him with a terribly croaky voice, courtesy to the deep sleep you previously had found yourself in.

"Anxiety attack", he gets out and whimpers, "I, I can’t get it to s-stop."

"I'm here, I’m right here", you are wide awake instantly, propping yourself up on your elbow to scoot closer and kiss his cheek, "I'm right here, Bunny. You’re safe now."

Jungkook nods his head, chasing your closeness with his trembling fingers twisting the front of your shirt. He’s safe now. Nothing can hurt him anymore because he has you to protect him now.

"I threw up", he confesses and sobs softly, "in, in t-the office. I, I had an attack and, and then I, I threw up b-because it, it was so strong. A-and now I, I can’t get it to, to stop."

"Oh no, I’m so sorry", you gasp, cradling him against your chest, "I fucking hate that you had to. This is the worst fucking feeling. Fuck, my Bunny", you hug him closer, burying your fingers in his hair, "I'm here now. Do you hear me? You’re not alone anymore."

"I really wanted to b-be in your arms, but you were in the exam so I, I didn’t call", he says, shivering like crazy.

"God no, my Bunny", you feel yourself tear up in guilt. Jungkook needed you and you weren’t there for him, "I'm so sorry. I feel so awful. Please call me next time. No matter where I am, you’ll always be the most important priority to me and I'll always come to help."

Jungkook sobs gratefully. He really needed that reassurance. He didn’t want to call you today, not because he thought that you would be angry, but because he didn’t want to disturb you. He wants you to be able to live your life and for you to be able to experience things like exams and college classes because you never got that when you were younger. And that’s why he didn’t call. Because he didn’t want to be the stupid reason why you had to miss out on such experiences.

But his anxiety has tortured him to the point where there was almost nothing left of him. And all Jungkook needed was to hear you reassure him that he will always have a shoulder to lean on with you. He needed to hear it. He never stopped believing it, but he still needed to hear it.

He feels better already now that he is resting in your arms and has your gentle touch soothing him. The painful lump in his throat is gone and those everlasting heart palpitations are calming down as well.

"I'm so sorry, my Bunny. I seriously feel awful", you whisper, kissing the shell of his ear softly.

Jungkook tilts his head up upon hearing the guilt in your voice and feeling the distinct sensation of your tears hitting his skin. Just as he had feared. You are crying, looking so guilty.

"It's not your fault. It’s okay", he whispers, "I love you so much."

"I love you too", you breathe, cupping his cheek, "I'll fight the fucking world to keep you safe" you add, running your thumb over his cheekbone.

Jungkook feels so unworthy of your love sometimes. It’s moments like these that make him feel like this. Moments where he realises that someone like you – someone who spent most of her life fighting for herself with no other person in mind – chooses to fight for him over and over and over again. You chose him. Chose him even if that meant stepping out of your comfort zone. Chose him even if that meant handing over some of your control to which you so obsessively clung to. You fucking chose him. As your family, partner and human for life. And Jungkook will never ever take that for granted.

"Please don’t fight it, you'll only hurt yourself", he whispers, making you laugh quietly.

"I'll be careful, promise."

Jungkook feels better now that he heard your laugh. His desire to flee from unknown danger ceases to exist and he doesn’t feel so broken anymore.

"I adore you so much", he whispers.

"I adore you too", you tell him, leaning down to kiss his cheek, "my Bunny."

Overwhelmed by his emotions, Jungkook seeks you out, nose brushing against your breasts and fingers traveling to your chest. He hopes that you will understand for he feels too weak to speak.

You rest back on your pillow. Knowing very well what his gesture means, you unbutton your shirt wordlessly. You open it until the button where he can comfortably reach your breasts.

"Thank you", he presses out and whimpers, cupping your right breast to guide your nipple to his lips. He whimpers again as he takes you inside, body growing limp in comfort and shivers finally stopping entirely.

Jungkook does this often when he needs true comfort. When his day was hard and his mental health was bad, all he truly needed was to be close to you. And on those really exhausting days, all that really helped was being able to suck on your breasts. He saw nothing sexual in the act during those moments and neither did you. It felt nurturing, comforting and safe. For both of you. For Jungkook because he was finally in your safe arms again and the gentle motion of sucking soothed him. And for you because you finally had the reassurance that your Jungkookie was safe and the warmth of his mouth relaxed you.

You never ended up having sex because of those moments. Not even once. This act, while perhaps sexual during other situations, was of the most intimate and vulnerable nature and leaves the both of you oh so much more connected. Jungkook also feels no ounce of anxiety when he can suck on your nipples. Whatever painful feelings kept him hostage before, they all instantly disappear the second he begins kissing and sucking your breasts.

Tonight is no different. Jungkook sucks on your breasts until he feels too sleepy to continue and you massage his scalp until your tired fingers stop working. Jungkook falls asleep just a little bit sooner than you. Reassured that he was finally at peace, you give in to the tiredness and fall asleep seconds later. And together you will forget about the world outside your windows, because all that truly matters was being in each other’s arms.

#jungkook fluff #jungkook angst #jungkook drabble #jungkook fanfic #jungkook x reader #jungkook x you #bts fluff #bts angst #bts drabble #bts fanfic #bts x reader #bts x you #bangtan fluff #bangtan angst #bangtan fanfic #bangtan drabble #bangtan x reader #bangtan x you #fanfic: aaol

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igotanidea · 1 year

Text

Lucky: Dick Grayson x reader

Requested as a part of my 1k celebration : Dick x adoration by @miraculous-panic/@gone-batty-fics

***

„Grayson! Stop creeping outside my office like a…. like a creep!” she yelled opening the door to the room and peeking outside, seeing her boyfriend talking to one of the office crew. Honestly, she wanted it to sound different, better, more humorously, but the poor choice of words just made it a bit unfortunate and she facepalmed herself mentally. Creep like a creep? Great job, Y/N. Great freaking job.

“Hello sunshine.” His gaze landed on her and he grinned that signature smile that made half of the ladies in the office swoon just because they were lucky enough to see it. Y/N however was unimpressed, as she crossed her arms and eyed him warningly. Maybe it was because she had that smile waiting for her home every day, after work. Or maybe because he was showing off, again. “Mind if I come in?”

“I’d rather you do, Dick. You make it impossible for the ladies to work. Shall I remind you, this is not a circus when you are a star of the show. This is a serious workplace.”

“I know.” he walked through the door, pecking her lips lightly, hand landing on her hip pulling her closer, on display for everyone and the unwanted audience made her blush.

It wasn’t normal for Dick to just swing by in the middle of the day and she wasn’t sure how to feel about it. On one hand it was nice to see him, on the other, she had reputation to uphold and couldn’t risk getting all sappy all over him. Not here. Even if all she wanted was to place him on her swivel chair, sit on his lap and kiss him breathless, letting his hands roam her body. God! This boy was truly gonna be the death of her.

It only took her a second to get those dirty thoughts out of her head. Since she was the COO of one of the biggest companies in Bludhaven, she learned how to control and conceal her emotions pretty well. No one would even notice that single blush and slightly glassy eyes. No one except Dick.

“You look a little red, baby. Don’t you think it’s a bit too hot in here? Who would have thought, right? On the 15th floor of the building?” he teased and almost as if he was reading her mind placed himself on the seat, legs spread wide.

“Richard!” she shrieked and closed the door, appalled by his behavior. “don’t you have somewhere else to be?”

“Where else would I be than with my beloved girlfriend? Come on, baby, you work so hard, how about we relax a bit.”

“I’m at work, Grayson. I know you don’t get since you truly are a trust fund baby, but some of us ….”

“Ouch, Y/N. That’s just cruel. Even for you.” he gasped grabbing his chest, faking pain “Right through my heart.”

“ Oh, please….” She rolled her eyes

“You know you got a nice office, baby. Wonder why I never came here before.” He spun around, eyes falling on different elements of the interior. “And what may that be?” something on her desk captured his attention. “A little Nightwing figure! Oh, how cute is that! But something is wrong with this one’s ass.”

“Dick….” She warned, rubbing her forehead “Please…..”

“Hm? What do you need baby?”

“I need you to leave. If my boss comes by and see me talking to you during work hours….”

“Oh, sweetheart.” Dick stood up and came closer to her, one hand back on her hip, the other grabbing her chin lightly and making her look up at him. Damn it, she had heels and he was still so freaking tall in comparison. “Old, good Elle would never hurt you.”

“You know my boss?!” her eyes grew wide, dozens of crazy scenarios running though her head. She was working here for a couple of years now, how was it possible that he never told her he was familiar with company’s CEO.

“Bruce does. Rumor has it they were involved, if you know what I mean. Small world, I guess. But hey” he raised his hands in defense “you made your way up by yourself, none of us interfered with that. Yes, I know you were thinking that.”

“Let’s just say I believe you. But she’s still my boss and wouldn’t be able to charm her.”

“What are we betting on?” he grinned.

“Dick, please….”

“I love it when you say it like that.”

“Will you just shut up!” she fumed turning around angrily, to hide the blush that was now creeping all over her face.

“Don’t be mad at me….” He pouted and hugged her from behind, close to his chest.

“Let go off me!” she struggled against his grip, finally breaking free. “Why can’t you understand? I’m at work, I got tone of things to do. And letting my inferiors speculate about what we do behind the closed door and ruining their opinion on me is definitely not one of them!”

“But baby….”

“Stop it, Richard, I’m serious. You act like a freaking child!” she hissed and only the sad look in his eyes made her realize that she might have gone overboard. She sighed deeply trying to calm herself down. “Dick. I promise I’ll be home earlier today. We can spend some time together.”

“Sure.” He nodded flatly “you’re right. I think I just need to go. See you later, Y/N. Hopefully you can live up to your promise and get back before I leave for the night patrol.”

He started walking towards the door, eyes fixed on the floor, passing her without another word or joke or …. Anything.

She should be mad. He came here, throwing innuendos left and right, disturbing her peace, invading her space that was strictly off limit, capturing attention, acting just like Bruce with his playboy attitude, leading her straight towards trouble. Really like a man child. And still believing she would just relent, melt into him in her own office (which she almost did), let him do whatever he wanted. That was a hard no and he deserved that.

So why was it that it made her feel guilty and sad?

“Miss Y/N?” one of her coworkers, who was still a student, peeked inside and the girl quickly raised her gaze, concealing the worry in her eyes with professionalism and composure.

“What is it Leah? Did you bring me the reports I asked for?”

“Yeah, yeah, sure. Got it right here, right on deadline. But….can I ask you something personal?”

“Sure, go ahead, feel free to” Y/N scoffed and threw her hands into the air “you’re just another person I have to remind today what it means to be at work.”

“Um…” Leah hesitated, sensing Y/N’s irritation and sarcasm dripping from her tone, but the curiosity was too big to contain it “how…. How is it to be with Mr.Grayson?”

“What?” Y/N was definitely taken by surprise by the question

“Please, forgive me, but he is just so handsome and cute and perfect in every way.”

“Perfect?”

“Yes….” Leah’s gaze became a bit blurry and Y/N didn’t like that at all. “Every time he comes by…..”

“What do you mean every time?! How many times before did it happen?! And why no one told me about it?”

“He asked us not to.” Leah squealed “he said he just needed to see you even from the distance. He said you had that spark in your eyes when you work, that irresistible glow and your energy is so alluring….”

“He said that outloud?!” oh, she was definitely going to kill her boyfriend. But it was just so …. cute….

“Mhm.”

“what else did he do?”

“He’s just so thoughtful and caring and gentle. He always ask me about my mother’s health….”

“Your mum’s sick?” Y/N eyes grew wide

“She’s diabetic….”

“I’m sorry Leah. Truly.”

“It’s fine. We’re holding on. But he’s just interested you know. Not only with me. Mr. Grayson also helped Sarah when she got in trouble with her boyfriend, Tom. Apparently that bastard was beating her up.”

“What?”

“Yeah. And you know, your guy just seems so different than any other I know. And he truly loves you, his every word, every glance she threw your direction when you didn’t know was just speaking for itself. …..And…

“What else?” Y/N gaze softened a bit upon looking at the young girl in front of her “come on, you’ve already said so much, might as well finish. Not a word you say will leave this office.”

“Um…. Jane and Carol were wondering whether he takes care of you …. In the bedroom, you know….” her voice broke “God! I’m so sorry, Ms. Y/L/N. I never should have said that. I’m just …. I don’t have any good experience with boys and I have no one to talk to about it and I’m just scared I will end up like Sarah and I don’t want that so I just….”

“Leah, Leah, hey….” Y/N grabbed her hand, worried about Leah’s mental state. “It’s all right. Calm down. I can’t say I appreciate you girls having such thoughts, but I get why you feel like that. You’re still young. Don’t pressure yourself. There are good men in the world. And there's the one that would treat you right. You will just know that.”

“Thanks….”

“I can’t believe I’m saying this and if you repeat it to anyone I will deny, but I like you, Leah. You…. you can come talk to me, I want you to know. You’re like one of the very few truly good people in this world and I don’t want you to get hurt. I’ll help you when you need, just …. Let’s keep it all professional, you are still my subordinate after all”

“Thank you, Miss Y/L/N! thank you, thank you, thank you! I’ve always looked up to you, since my first day. “ Leah jumped in joy and excitement “And you are truly lucky, miss Y/N. It’s hard to find someone like that

“Yeah….” Y/N repeated, the wheels in her mind turning. “I am. I am lucky.” Sudden realization hit her “I am lucky.” She stood up from her chair. “Leah?”

“Yes?”

“Get me HR on the phone.”

“Why?”

“I’m taking the rest of the day off. Some personal matters just came out. I need to take care of them immediately. Also…” she cleared her throat and fixed her jacket “I expect all of the statements and report I assigned to Sarah, Jane and Carol on my desk tomorrow morning. That should keep them busy enough to not talk about the matters they should not ever been interested in.”

“I’ll see you tomorrow then, Miss Y/N?”

“Indeed, Leah.” Y/N smiled at the younger girl.

***

“Dick?” she entered their shared apartment, throwing the bag onto the floor, discarding her shoes, almost tripping over her own legs and running into the living room. Thank god, he was there, splayed on the couch, mindlessly flipping through his iPhone.

“Y/N? Why are you home? What happened? Are you hurt, baby?” he stood up immediately, his first instinct upon seeing her was helping, taking care, making whatever was going on better.

“Oh, Dick” she sobbed and rushed towards him, jumping into his arms, legs wrapping around his waist, hands around his neck, bringing his face down to kiss him with everything she had in her.

“Not that I’m complaining, but why the sudden affection?” he grinned pulling away for air, even if she almost didn’t let him.

“I’m so sorry, baby” she sobbed in his arms “I’m so sorry….”

“For what?” Dick held her tighter, making sure she would not slip from his grip.

“I was so unfair to you. I was, well, in the lack of a better word, a bitch. I got so used to having you for myself I completely forgot that you are a treasure. And, as much as it pains me to say it, I had to be externally reminded of it. God, Dick, I love you, I love you, I love you so much. ….” She repeated frantically, kissing all over his face, on every place she could reach.

“Y/N, baby!” he laughed, enjoying and welcoming that sudden affection he didn’t get in a while “Baby, stop for a moment!” he cupped her cheek, his blue eyes meeting her e/c orbs and all that adoration he saw in them made him melt. “Let me tell you something. It’s important.”

“What….?” she shivered, fearing what words may come out of his mouth. Was he angry at her?

“I love you too. So much.” He pressed his lips onto her, dissipating all her worries. “How long do I have you?”

“I took the rest of the day off…” she trailed but Dick did not let her finish, when he threw her onto the bed.

“Let me make it worth your while.” He grinned leaning over her body.

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