#ok rant over...

[yemme]

No. No. No. You don't start The Trauma Code: Heroes on Call like this and then put me on a regular hospital time out... No. NO.

[floweypilled]

i have the fourth year redraw of something in a couple month s im getting impatient i wanna draw it already😭

[crumb-crumblet-s-crumbington]

"You and me, Ethan. Together we go save Rose, and then we can grind Miranda into paste!"

[iztea]

farmer aku can be something so personal,

[agoddamneddelight]

me posting a christmas themed fiddauthor comic in mid-may? more likely than you think

[theribbajack]

"Now, the vow will be honoured, and my Lord brother's soul will return."

Radahn stans keep winning, but I personally am in Miyazaki's walls rn

[cartoonjessie]

[vaguely-concerned]

thinking about how deeply lucanis' life has been defined by a lack of control of that life -- as he himself points out, even before the ossuary went and carved the headline out again with big bloody letters. of course he reacts badly to losing what little control he did manage to construct for himself even within those circumstances.

(namely: experience has taught him that things (caterina, loss, pain, love, all horribly and indelibly intermingled) will happen to him whether he wants them to or not and there's nothing he can do about that... but he gets to decide what's let in or out of his soul as it happens, even if he has to close it all down and deaden and numb himself out in the process. (even if that means he drifts further and further away from illario, who's been desperately reaching out and trying to keep hold of him until he finally gives up completely and tries to cut the bond all at once when lucanis doesn't seem to reach back anymore.) it's such rare well-observed freeze logic solidly constructed from the bottom up, I'm still so impressed with it.

the way illario seeks constant external means to cope with caterina's abuse and importance in his life -- he can't win her admiration or acceptance or warmth (or like. acknowledgement even, at times :') ), no matter what, so he goes out and finds those things in others and then disdains and dismisses it for how easily and falsely it's won from them. he plots, he conspires, he tries to beat her at her own game however clumsily, he tries. lucanis doesn't try things that way. he's not about 'how do I improve my situation' by nature, he's 'how can I stop this from getting worse'. he avoids, he internalizes, he hunkers down and makes himself nothing until the pain maybe ends. he's fundamentally not a plotter, he's a reacter. an expert assassin pantser, if you will, to illario's clear and stated exasperation fhsak. man I love them. illario says 'get us out of here!!! if you loved me as I love you you'd help me get us out of here before it kills us both', lucanis says 'there is no other place, there's nowhere to go, all we can do is endure. and if it kills us... well, that's just family. that's what love is (the way things are headed I'll die first anyway so it's fine I won't have to face losing you)', and they're equally baffled and hurt by each other's POV. but they're both right, and they're both wrong. there's no 'right' way to deal with caterina's treatment of them, or their situation. the house always wins, if you pardon the expression. house dellamorte still stands and that is what matters to caterina in the end more than anything.

it also fits so well b/c like... their core wounds are that illario is the least favourite and is constantly dismissed, so he has to prove to caterina again and again that he matters. not even that he's worth love or respect or warm regard, but that he's here at all and as such should be considered. he has to shout 'in case u forgot I EXIST!!' at the top of his lungs or else be rendered nothing within the family structure (and himself, because it's all about family, that's all that really matters. in some weird twisted way I think caterina openly declaring him before all the other crows to still be of house dellamorte -- and no one from house dellamorte kneels -- is kind of a victory for him, as much as it's also a furthering of a prison sentence and public humiliation. house dellamorte brainfuckery goes hard.). lucanis is the favourite, and it's the double-edged sword that he gets all the affection and attention but also all the control and impossible expectations. drowning under all of that constant stress and close evaluation, his brain whispers 'I don't exist' to try to escape, to hide and hold on to the deep parts of himself that are crucial to life but not part of the perfect grandson caterina demands of him as the price of her love.)

I think a lot about how what seems to disquiet lucanis the most post-ossuary (as it would anyone with that psychological makeup) is the dissolving of internal boundaries and control he's been relying on, which is part of what spite symbolizes. his anger and reactivity has seceded from the union to the point of personification as a little guy (a little guy he resents and fears for his unpredictability and invasions into regions of his psyche he wishes to stay frozen and barren, and yet cares about deeply, loves! and also constantly dismisses and frequently helplessly lets down unless he's helped to learn to do otherwise. does this remind you of another relationship in his life, perhaps. it makes me feel nuts to think about the illario/spite parallels thanks for asking), and now that little guy is out there running the show freely the moment he glances away or closes his eyes. literal nightmare scenario I feel for him so deeply. so much of his coping is predicated on being able to Not do or feel or want certain things, and that's out the window now, Spite has Opinions. Spite refuses to stay wisely in place even if that place is hell on the logic that if you move you could find yourself in a place that's even worse, somehow. Spite actually wants to experience the world, however fucked up and scarring the way he arrived here, not just endure it. Spite means he has to face that maybe illario wasn't wrong all those years, at the same time as having to admit and face what illario has done to him, and figure out what to do about any of it.

anyway. mary kirby ma'am that's some good fucking metaphor work. thank you, and sorry about all the shit that happened

[skullzy20]

Hold on everyone I'm gonna be sick thinking about this

The fact the Drifter doesn't even feel like they belong in the Origin System is honestly painful. The fact they feel like everyone likes the Operator more because it's originally their timeline, and they've just grown to already accept that. The fact they feel actually at home in the fucking year of 1999.

The fact they feel like they were essentially being used when being sent back to 1999, but they end up staying and feeling more at home in the year despite being sent there like an errand boy. Feeling at home in a place you've barely been in for too long compared to everywhere else you've been for the rest of your life? That must feel wild, y'know? And exciting, but also terrifying.

They just have never felt like they belonged anywhere, basically, but when being sent off on a mission by the Lotus they end up actually feeling like the place they ended up felt like home. People finally care about them, and even love them. Friendships were formed and maybe even a true and genuine heartfelt relationship. Sure, they're still surrounded by daily threats like the Scaldra and Techrot, but there's people who actively care about their well-being now.

Imagine it, no longer actually being alone for most of your life? Having people who worry about you, for the first time in who knows how many years? Getting genuine human (as 'human' as the protoframes get) interaction instead of being called around to do jobs? To simply just exist in such a place? It must feel like a huge breath of fresh air

It's so human and it's so real. You finally begin to heal from the trauma that's been a part of essentially most- if not all your life before arriving. It's such a stark contrast to how things are in the Origin System. I wouldn't want to leave either.

Yeah I like the 1999 update a normal amount (lying)

[spinaart]

hey leader!!!

[limesandcoconuts]

everyday i wish rtte had given astird and ruffnut the girlboss friendship they deserved rather than heather.

[angel-fruitcake]

what irritates me more than anything else is how there are people still denying the romantic nature of destiel. if you don't like it or don't ship it for any reason, okay! that's fine! that is a completely valid thing for you to do and i respect your choice!! but the second you start trying to tell me that it isn't canon, in the year of our lord 2025, that's when i snap. it has been well established by the fandom AND the cast and crew of supernatural that Destiel Is A Part Of The Canon Story. stop trying to take that away from us, we have been gaslit and traumatized enough for a fucking lifetime! no more! there's no law stating you have to ship something just bc it's canon! but for the love of god learn the difference between disliking something and denying it's existence!!

[magnus-the-maqnificent]

Alright rant time cause the internet is pissing me off.

Y'all need to tone down your Taylor hate. Especially all the people on tumblr. Y'all may have your "justified" reasons to hate her but to me it just looks like you're going full circle and ending up where all the anti-Taylor MAGAts are.

Those people booing her at the super bowl? They weren't booing because she's a "Climate criminal" or a billionaire or whatever, they were booing because she's a woman who dared to show her face on camera (which wasn't even her choice) at their prestigious male power event. And you are on their side.

I don't give a shit about why you dislike Taylor Swift. What I do care about is the 11 year old girls who were stabbed and killed for liking her.

Taylor will be fine, but it's her fans who will suffer the most if you keep normalizing the hate against her to such a dangerous level.

Seriously, keep that shit to yourself.

[frownyalfred]

to clarify for the new chapter of dead man’s party since I keep getting comments on it (and on the last chapter): yes Jason is Red Hood, so he works with strippers and respects them. yes, he grew up around working girls like that and is familiar with strippers/dancers/etc. AND, all those things can be true and he can still get flustered the first time his post-Pit ass sees a stripper clap their heels in his face and try to show him her G-string. being familiar with the game in theory doesn’t make you less susceptible to it!

the whole point of that fic is that he came back as badass Red Hood, but despite being bigger and grown up after the Pit, he still missed out on some important development emotionally. he shoots people but he gets flustered by the idea of a lap dance. yes! both can be true at the same time. and trying to pretend you’re not missing that chunk of development is what gets Jason into a lot of trouble in that fic. when he tries to play along and prove that he’s not missing it, and no one around him is any the wiser, he only ends up hurting himself.

[aerequets]

when I'm pissed at my groupmates so I start punctuating my texts