#omg my baby is smiling T.T

[fujoshigirl7]

H...he.....he smiled😭

[yoonpobs]

bad boy good thing xiv.

pairing: jeon jungkook x oc

genre: angst, smut, fluff, miscommunication (we hate her lol), pining

warnings: smut, jungkook is really an asshole, the angst hurts a lot tbh, unhealthy relationships (?)

words: 5, 690

summary: a series of drabbles where you're confused and jungkook's confusing

a/n:

hello!!!! we’re here at fourteen chapters omg ✨✨when i first started this series it was mostly self-indulgent and now there are people who actually enjoy reading it??🥺 it almost doesn’t seem real T.T 

thank you so much for the love and support!!! just so I don't give too much spoilers for this chap - I apologise to my fellow geminis for the potential slander 🤣 this is more of a self-drag lmaooo 

anyway, I hope you enjoy this chap!!!

“Ah. I’m getting allergies.” Yena sniffs, scrunching her nose.

You furrow your brows in concern, “Are you okay? Do you need any medicine?”

“It’s just the seasonal changes,” She brushes you off.

You nod in understanding, “I get it. My mom has horrible reactions towards pollen so—”

“I’m not allergic to flowers.” She blinks.

“Then what—?”

“It’s Gemini season. It’s like—literally the worst time of the year.” She blinks.

You gawk at her, taking a whole ten seconds to process her serious tone when she doesn’t waver under your scrutiny.

“I’m a Gemini,” You inform her slowly.

“I mean …” She shrugs all as you scowl at her, opting to throw the closest object you had, which was your favourite pen so you decide against it; simply shooting her the meanest glare you could possibly muster.

“Look, it’s not you,” She sighs, and you’re half-expecting her to finish with an it’s me to make you scoff, “It’s me.” And there you go. “I mean, it’s Gemini’s in general because they’re two-faced bitches who have the worst emotional attachment issues. Like they’re literally what the opposite of glue is. And they’re so over-analytical. How is it like psychoanalysing every person you meet only to hurt your own feelings and sulk about it?”

You blink.

“I mean it’s not you but if the shoe fits.” She says casually, plopping a grape into her mouth that you’re tempted to slap away.

“You’re so mean!” You pout indignantly.

She cackles, throwing her head back as you continue to sulk. You weren’t that bad. You just … you were risk-averse! You liked having the freedom to observe everyone and anyone and package them into tiny compartments in your head so you could understand them better. You weren’t … that Gemini.

“You’re so cute,” She coos pinching your cheeks. “No wonder Beef One and Beef Two like you so much.” She teases.

Your first reaction is to blush because you know who exactly she’s talking about, but you have more pressing matters, like—

“You have nicknames for them?” You ask, baffled.

“Hey, I wasn’t friends with many girls in high school. Don’t girls usually have nicknames for their crushes?” She says through a pout.

You stay expressionless as you try to gauge the level of seriousness you can extract from her tone.

You realise she’s dead serious.

“Yeah, but we’re in college,” You argue, scrunching your nose, “And sides’, it’s not like they’re strangers. We know them.”

She rolls her eyes, waving you off like you were the inconvenience here. Then she leans forward, her eyes twinkling as she takes a complete one-eighty that you try to adjust to.

“So … you Gemini hoe, what’s your plans?” She nudges you.

You raise a brow, “Did you just call me a—?”

“Plans, ___. Stay on track.” She scolds.

You sigh, still fond but you pretend to be annoyed. You really couldn’t get annoyed with Yena. After all, the more time you spend with her the more you realise how much life sucked before you had her in your life. You spent each moment learning more about her quirks and habits, her choice of words that made you giggle or laugh until you were crying.

And you realise that this is how she loves, a little rough but welcomed nonetheless.

“If you’re talking about my birthday then … not much. I’m probably stuck doing admin work for the college’s charity programme.” You shrug, stabbing a fork into your soiled salad.

Yena gapes at you, “Not much—excuse me? It’s your birthday! You’re turning twenty-five!” 

You look at her dryly, “I’ve been twenty-five since the year—”

She groans, “That’s not the same! You’re like—officially twenty-five. You’re literally hitting the mark for a quarter-life crisis. Isn’t that something to celebrate?” 

“Me going through an existential crisis at the end of my degree is not how I want to celebrate my birthday but okay,” You blink.

She rolls her eyes at your realism.

“That’s not the point. Point is, this is our first birthday together and I want it to be special.” She points out.

You snort, “What? Are we doubling my birthday as our monthsary or something?”

She shoves you with a brute force that has you snickering but she continues to pester you anyway.

“You’re so dumb. So smart, but so dumb,” She shakes her head, “You’re always studying or doing some form of work that requires the use of more than one brain cell. You deserve a break. Besides, you have two dudes to pick from on how you’d like to be wined and dined and—”

“Yena!” You whine.

“—it’ll be like an episode of the Bachelorette! But just with a super cool and smart best friend that’ll make the decision for you. It’s not your birthday. It’s ours.” She emphasises towards the end.

You stare at her for a long second, before the two of you are bursting into laughter at the absurdity of her statement. 

It was nice, just to laugh about things without having your heart feel so heavy. Even if it was a mild distraction, it was still wholly pleasant to be able to just talk about mindless things that didn’t require much mental gymnastics to navigate the conversation with.

“What are the two of you laughing about?” Taehyung and Jimin arrive at impeccable timing, sliding into the booth with their own packaged food. It’s very college-student-esque, a cute paper (because no plastic) container filled with an array of assortments.

“None of your XY chromosomes business.” Yena retorts.

Jimin blinks, “You are literally so hostile.”

“Then don’t give me a reason to be.” She sticks her tongue out petulantly.

You laugh, nudging her with your shoulder, “Be nice.”

Taehyung rolls his eyes but manages to keep a civil smile on his face. Always the more rational one between the two. 

“Anyway, Yena definitely isn’t going to answer me so, what’s up?” He turns to look at you.

You roll your eyes but it’s half-hearted, “She wants to celebrate my birthday like we’re on the Bachelorette.”

“Like you’re on the Bachelorette.” She corrects.

“Oh my God, our baby’s turning twenty-five!” Jimin coos at the reminder, pinching your cheeks as he coddles you. You scowl and weakly shove him away, even if you preen under the attention.

“I’m literally older than the both of you.” You huff.

Yena blinks, “There’s no way I’m the oldest person at this table.”

Taehyung furrows his brows, “Wait—how old are you?”

She sends him a scathing glare that has his arms raised up in defence.

“Jeez, okay. Don’t answer.”

“I’m going to answer because you told me not to.” She clips. “I’m twenty-seven.”

Jimin blinks, “No wonder you and Yoongi hyung are so alike.”

You almost miss it, but as Yena so eloquently pointed out, you were a sucker for psychoanalysing people (even if you didn’t want to admit it yet) that you notice the way she flushes ever so slightly as she scoffs.

“Him? How dare you compare me to that sorry excuse of a—!”

“Okay, everyone is beneath you. I’m sorry your highness.” Jimin rolls his eyes.

You make a note to ask her about it because you know for a fact that Yoongi ‘complains’ about Yena every hour he can. It’s almost as if he can’t go long enough without mentioning her.

You smile to yourself as you duck your head.

“Exactly,” She flips her hair over her shoulders before turning to face you. “Anyway, back to you—our baby.”

Taehyung nods, “Exactly, the baby.”

You scrunch your nose, “Don’t coddle me.”

He pats your head before cooing at you like he would to an actual baby, “But you’re just so cute. You’re too good for this shitty world. Too good for the likes of mere mortals like us.”

“Not me.” Yena blinks before gesturing to their bodies, “You.”

Jimin sticks his tongue out in retaliation as you sigh at their never-ending bickering.

Somehow … it felt right. You think it most of the times but you don’t know any other way to describe how it feels to be back with your friends, laughing, bickering and just appreciating their presence.

When you and Jungkook had your issues, it was like you made the conscious choice to avoid everyone and anyone as much as you could, and any interaction you had during that period was purely out of coincidences and not the intention. You remember actively avoiding Jimin and Taehyung because it felt too draining to pretend like you didn’t have a battle in your head. Even studying or spending time with Namjoon made you feel guilty, the thought of Jungkook lingering in your mind. Yena was there through it all, but even then you saw her as much as you did with any of your classmates you so happened to share a class with.

In fact, if it weren’t for Yena you’d probably have zero social interactions as a whole because she just knew. She somehow picked up on your internal conflicts but never outwardly shamed you or confronted you about it. All she did was be there for you, offering you her presence and you were grateful.

So, yeah. Things were better, but your heart was still at its core—confused. Your feelings for Jungkook didn’t disappear overnight and you knew that you were the one that asked for space.

You forgave him … you did, honestly. But there are things you can’t forget, and those are the things that you wished you could. The words he said in principle, was outright shitty. But the fact that it came from him only poked at every single one of your insecurities that you developed over the years.

You knew it wasn’t healthy to compare yourself to other women when they were living vastly different lives than you were, but it’s proven difficult when you’re forced to see these type of women every day, at college, in your community work or on the media. 

Believing Jungkook’s apparent feelings for you was harder because, well. Jungkook was Jungkook. He wasn’t just another guy, and despite his shortcomings, he had more merits than he’d let on and you knew that people saw that. It was also the fact that Jungkook had a charm that drew all types of people in. He was soft-spoken but passionate, and people loved a quiet achiever.

You … knew about the women. Way before Jennie and way before the thing between the two of you happened. Jimin and Taehyung would always update you about the new fling or girl he had tied to his hip just as he was in his final year in high school. You had to force a smile every single time they’d snicker and joke about how your Jungkook suddenly became a man overnight.

And you noticed the trend with the women he liked. They were … captivating. Beautiful wasn’t even enough to describe them because they looked like they could carry the world on their shoulders and spark immense change with just the movement of their lips. They were confident and charismatic, outgoing and just the right amount of flirty. You were anything but.

It sucked, majorly, because you spent years agonising over the fact that you were already coined with the older sister title in the group because of the way you acted—just a little more uptight than the average woman your age. You were quiet but loud in the right company; you didn’t like crowds, socialising or mingling around with people you didn’t know and based on your observations it seemed like that was the only thing that Jungkook’s been doing ever since he made it to senior year in high school, and even in the first years of college.

You don’t resent him, you think. You couldn’t blame him because you weren’t honest either. You consented, to all of the kisses and touches even if he hadn’t officially had sex with you. You wanted to, but you were terrified. Not at the prospect of penetration but at the prospect of not being enough and the fact that Jungkook was the only person you wanted to have sex with while he had options that were far more attractive and experienced than you were.

That’s why you needed time because at least you could get your shit together even if it was an uphill battle.

“Earth to ____?” Taehyung waves a hand in front of your face with a concerned expression.

You blink, snapping out of your daze as you offer a meek smile and an apology.

“We just asked you if you wanted a small get together at Tae’s and I’s place for your birthday?” Jimin asks.

“Really?” You beam. That was exactly what you preferred.

“Yeah, we know you don’t like clubs and stuff. Just a small and intimate gathering with all your best buds.” He grins.

You nod your head, but Yena beats you to a response.

“By best buds you mean the three friends she has, which is us and the two meatheads duelling for her affection.” She snorts.

You flush, “Y-Yena!”

Taehyung snickers at your embarrassment.

“It doesn’t help that both of them are literally the biggest dudes on the football team. It’s literally like watching King Kong and Godzilla getting into a fight for world domination.”

Jimin throws his back in laughter as you fold your arms across your chest at post at the way your friends are practically crying in laughter at the image. Jimin was clutching onto Taehyung for his dear life because if he didn’t then he’d fall off the chair.

“Stop,” You whine, “you guys are being mean.”

“Oh my God, you’re literally the only person on this earth that would take two people fighting for your attention as an offence.” Taehyung groans.

“I-It’s not that!” You deny exasperatedly, “I-It’s just … awkward …”

Jimin sighs with a small smile, patting your head.

“If it’s any consolation I think it’s offensive that Jungkook thinks he even has the right to breathe in—”

“Jimin!”

“Wow. It really is like King Kong and Godzilla.” Jimin whistles lowly, eyeing the scene before him with amusement lingering in his eyes.

“Do you think they’re gonna start slamming their chests soon or …?” Taehyung trails off in a whisper, leaning into Jimin so that the two other men wouldn’t notice.

“I can literally hear you.” You say dryly.

Jimin offers you a plastic smile, “You’re meant to hear us, babe. How about you try to tame them like Jane did with Tarzan?”

Jimin nearly shrieks when you shove him so fiercely that he topples over into Taehyung’s grasp as the second part of the duo only catches him in the process. 

You sigh, completely ignoring the way that Jimin’s muttering curses that were directed to you under his breath. Instead, you were transfixed on the scene before you—which specifically is Jungkook and Namjoon staring each other down through the mirror of the gym. You were lucky that it was just the five of you since Namjoon was able to use his captain privileges to book the gym because you had no idea how to explain the fact that two big-sized men were attempting to outdo each other in their circuit reps as if they were on a suicide mission.

“Listen, when I agreed to help you out with your sets I thought I was meant to help log it in for a report.” You exasperate, but the two men continue their manly lift-off as they huff and puff their exertion away.

“Trust me, you are helping. Being the motivation is more than—”

This time it’s Taehyung who faces your wrath as you thwack him upside the head. 

From where Jungkook and Namjoon were, Jungkook can only deliver death stares into the direction of his captain who returns it tenfold. He wasn’t even sure why they were doing this but something a flicked definitely switched in Jungkook when Namjoon (purposefully) revealed that you were helping out with something. At the gym. Supposedly alone.

Jungkook’s primitive side came out because the next thing Namjoon knew was that Jungkook managed to drag himself, and Jimin and Taehyung as a diversion. He still feels his chest swell with pride when recalling the scowl on Namjoon’s face when he entered the gym, all fake smiles and a pep in his step.

“____, could you help me spot?” Namjoon breathes, sitting up from whatever the hell he was doing with the barbell. You weren’t fixated with gym language and you weren’t even sure why he was asking you when there was an entire Jimin and Taehyung right next to you.

“Uh, okay sure—“

“Noona,” Jungkook calls.

You freeze.

“Jungkook … I thought we established that you don’t need to call me that anymore.” You raise an eyebrow.

You miss the obvious glare that Namjoon shoots his bitchass friend, as well as the snorts that leave Jimin and Taehyung’s mouth.

“Pay attention to me,” Jungkook pouts. Like, actually pouts. You somehow flush because he seemed so much like the younger version of Jungkook who used to always coddle you for attention.

“Okay but after I help—”

“Yeah. After she helps me.” Namjoon interjects, and you nearly jump at the way he’s suddenly behind you, more so—pressed against your back with his hands on your hips as he moves you aside to get to another piece of equipment.

Your breath hitches because while you weren’t exactly invested in Namjoon in the romantic sense, he was undeniably attractive and … big. You could salivate in private.

“Oh my God, do you see that?” Taehyung hisses in a hushed whisper.

“Hyung is petty,” Jimin gawks.

“This is Namjoon we’re talking about. Didn’t he steal all the umbrellas from your dorm because you ratted him out to the librarian when he broke a bookshelf?” Taehyung recalls.

Jimin pauses to retract his mind to that moment.

“He’s so petty and I’m living for it. Look at Kook’s face,” He snickers, nudging Taehyung with his shoulder.

Jungkook only can clench his jaw in return because he knew that you wouldn’t be a fan of him reaching out to strangle the shit out of Namjoon. But the older boy seems fine, if not pleased with how Jungkook’s fuming in his own spot.

“Let me just …” You cock a thumb to Namjoon, before releasing a breath of your own and going to help him with whatever he needed in the first place.

“Jimin can help him. I have a more pressing problem.” He complains.

You stop in your tracks before turning around, raising an eyebrow at Jungkook who finally sits up, still staring at you like you held all the solutions in the world.

“Literally wait for your turn,” Namjoon scowls.

“My arm hurts,” Jungkook says, raising his arm to show you. 

“I don’t … see anything?” You furrow your brows.

“Because my muscles hurt, Noona,” Jungkook emphasises with a flex of his bicep and you can feel yourself get hot in the way your eyes can’t stray away.

You’re momentarily distracted by the blatant display of muscle by Jungkook that you completely miss the way that Jimin and Taehyung are struggling to breathe because of how hard they’re stifling their laughter or the way that Namjoon is contemplating on throwing the nearest dumbbell into Jungkook’s direction.

You flush, “Okay, you know what? Wait here. Let me get the first aid kit.” You mumble, quickly scampering off to alleviate yourself from the situation.

The moment you leave the room, Namjoon takes two long strides until he reaches where Jungkook’s sat, before wrapping a hand around the arm that was supposedly hurt—and squeezes.

“Ow! What the fuck hyung?!” Jungkook shrieks.

“Don’t hyung me, you brat.” Namjoon seethes, “What the fuck is wrong with you?”

Jungkook gapes, while Jimin and Taehyung watch in amusement.

“Me?! What’s wrong with you?” Jungkook retorts, equally as agitated, “Oh, _____, help spot me! Woe is me! Like she wouldn’t get crushed under you, you meathead!” 

“Like you’re any better,” Namjoon snaps, “Oh, Noona, pay attention to me. My arm hurts. You might as well have asked her to change your fucking diapers at the rate you’re acting like a damn child.”

“You’re the one that started all of this!” Jungkook exasperates, “With all due respect hyung, I love you and you’re my captain but I really feel like smashing your head into the wall right now.”

“That’s it?” Namjoon scoffs, “Well I’ll do you one better and let you know that every time you breathe in my direction I feel like—”

“Oh my God will you two idiots shut the fuck up?” Taehyung interjects, snapping at the two boys who pause, staring up at him with wide eyes.

Even Jimin is surprised at Taehyung’s intervention, purely because he was the type that usually let shit slide or let other people put problematic individuals into place. He was the mediator, the diplomat—not usually the aggressor.

“Wha—”

“Another peep and I’m going to smother your body under the dumbbells and leave you here to rot and die.” Taehyung seethes, staring straight into Jungkook’s soul.

That shuts him up.

“Both of you are acting like goddamn children, and for what? To battle out your masculinity to see who gets ____’s attention first?” Taehyung exasperates.

Namjoon clears his throat, “We were just—”

“—acting like a bunch of barbarians who’s never seen civilisation?” Taehyung retorts dryly, “Yeah. Because that’s exactly what this looks like. The two of you are so petty and for what? You two are literally rubbing the last remaining brain cells you have with each other but nothing is coming out from it. Like—nothing. Do you think she’d give a shit which one of you can lift more reps? That means absolutely nothing! She’s already freaked the fuck out at the prospect of her childhood best friend being in love with her and now we have Big Tit Number One and Two battling it out like you’re in the Greek Olympics.”

Jungkook blinks, and Jimin is mildly impressed.

“So before she comes back and tends to Jungkook’s hurt muscle,” Taehyung sneers, eyes narrowing at a guilty-looking Jungkook, “Both of you better sort your shit out.”

Namjoon flushes, embarrassed at the prospect of being called out, all while Jungkook is avoiding eye contact at all costs.

“Oh my God, do you have a crush on each other or something? Apologise!” Taehyung gestures towards the two boys who awkwardly blink at each other, feeling much like reprimanded children.

It’s Namjoon who breaks the silence first, clearly the more mature one in the situation.

“Look … Jungkook,” He sighs, “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to … drag it out like this. I don’t mean it maliciously and you’re my friend and teammate, so I’d really hate if a girl got in the way.”

Jungkook nibbles on his lips, eyebrows still scrunched; and the irrational part of him tells him to ignore the apology. But with the way that Taehyung is glaring him down, with Jimin’s expectant gaze, he knows that he doesn’t have much of a choice.

“I’m sorry … too,” he winces at his own voice, “But just to let you know … I really …” He shuts his eyes, feeling his chest tighten when he tries to force the words out, “She isn’t just … a girl to me, hyung. I really, really like her. And—I know you like her too but … I fucked up and I really want to make things right and seeing you—”

Jungkook is flushing while he rambles on, fully aware that the rest of his friends are listening intently to him speaking his heart. But a hand rests itself on his shoulder, and when Jungkook opens his eyes he sees Namjoon offering him a gentle smile.

“I know,” He says, “I know I said I wouldn’t back off …” He trails off and Jungkook recalls the conversation he had with him in the very same gym just a few weeks back, “But I don’t think I can compete with a decade long love story.” 

Jungkook scoffs, though his ears are flushed.

“It’s really not—”

Namjoon waves him off, clasping a tight hand onto his back that tells him it’s okay, and whatever that was going on would get better. And Jungkook feels marginally better and allows himself to let out a sigh of release.

“So are the two of you gonna kiss or what?” Jimin asks in the midst of the silence.

Namjoon glares at the boy, “Don’t make me give you an extra ten laps.”

He backs down immediately, raising his hands up in defence. And at that moment, you return, all smiles and with a pant as you raise the first aid kit up.

“Your arm?” You smile sweetly, and Jungkook can only offer a weak on in return.

“Can I ask you something?” 

“Depends. Will I have to run from the government if I answer you honestly?” Yena ponders out loud.

You roll your eyes but shake your head anyway. The two of you were meant to be cooking dinner but you’ve surrendered yourself to Netflix and Yena’s witty live commentary on horrible films you were scrolling through an hour earlier. Though, your head wasn’t quite in it, to begin with; your thoughts drifting to other aspects, ones that you thought too hard for and didn’t necessarily know the answer to.

It was frustrating, the way that you wanted to have a solution for everything but overthought every single case that happens to pass by your mind. 

“No one’s hunting anyone down, your anarchist,” You say, “This is a little … personal.” 

You didn’t have any girl friends prior to Yena, and that was your first mistake. You weren’t the person that actively avoided having girl friends because you thought they were dramatic or overly emotional but purely because you never knew how to befriend women. It was weird—being a woman yet being muddled with your own sense of femininity that suppressed your ability to form meaningful friendships with your women peers.

Throughout most of your childhood and teenaged life, you only had Jimin, Taehyung and Jungkook. While they were more than enough to keep your memories cheerful and filled with laughter, there were more personal things that you couldn’t quite approach them with. They had each other to confide in their ‘manly’ discussions, small talk that you’d often flush at—but you couldn’t ask them the same things you wanted to.

You knew, that on a fundamental level that your personal things were just … things. It wasn’t that deep, nor did it require a PhD in Gender Studies to fully understand the nuance of periods or apparent ‘girl’ problems; you just needed to listen. But you were timid, and you got embarrassed super easily—so that never boded well whenever you’d want to approach them with a question of your own.

But now, you had Yena—debatably the most open and understanding person you’ve met in your life; and you owed it to yourself, and her—to be honest, to live yourself vicariously in your girl best friends eyes—and ask:

“How do you have sex?”

Granted, there was definitely a smoother way of peeling off the bandaid, but you supposed if you were going to be discussing this one way or another, you’d go big or go home.

“I’m sorry,” She coughs, “What?”

You blink.

“Sorry, I guess I should’ve asked if you were a virgin first …” You mumble.

Yena stares at you with a stupefied expression as she gapes at you.

“Hey, repeat after me: candy, tree and cat.” She grabs you by your shoulders.

“I’m not cerebrally compromised, Yena,” you say dryly.

“Repeat,” She glares.

You huff, shoving her hand off your shoulder.

“Candy, tree and cat. There, happy?” You huff.

She eyes you weirdly as you sigh. 

“Are you sure you’re okay?”

“Yes!” You exasperate, “So like … how? Do you just? Penetrate?”

Yena blinks one more time, her eyes trailing to the ceiling as she asks for a higher being to give her strength before she returns her gaze onto your figure.

“Babe, that is literally the unsexiest way to approach sex.” 

“Penetration?” You furrow your brows.

She scrunches her brows, “No.” She gestures to you, “That.”

You scowl.

“I don’t know how to approach sex! That’s why I’m asking you. I literally don’t know who else to approach. If I went to Jimin or Taehyung I’m pretty sure they’d just stare at me and cry. Namjoon is out of the picture because he’d likely approach sex textbook style and I don’t need that level of detail right now. I definitely can’t ask Jungkook because he’s the guy I wanna have sex with. So yeah. I’m here because you’re a woman and the only person I can have a full conversation with without losing my will to live.”

Yena gawks at you, jaw slack as you finish your ramble; ears flushed.

“… you …” She begins, wracking her brain for the words that seem to fail her, “… okay. You know what, the fact that you’re here and putting your big girl pants on and asking me this is a feat in itself so I’m going to just ignore the fact that you said you wanted to have sex with Jungkook.”

You flush, “I was word vomiting—”

“Ah,” She holds her hands up, levelling you with a knowing glare, “If you want honest, you be honest too.”

You slump in your seat, sighing as you nod your head defeatedly.

“Firstly, I’m not a virgin. I could never be a virgin.” Yena declares, “Granted, I’ve slept with three people and two of them were women. But the idiot I lost my virginity to was, unfortunately, of XY chromosomes so … I guess I can answer your questions.”

“I mean … I know how sex works but … approaching it …” You mutter.

“And sex isn’t this groundbreaking act that requires Einstein’s IQ to partake in. It’s both intimate and not, and that’s definitely a personal preference. You can know the semantics of how people have sex, for hets in this case, which is just the classic ol’ penetration method where the penis enters the—”

“Your point?” You exasperate.

“—okay, I got a little carried away. But really, sex isn’t … difficult. It’s scary, I’ll give you that. But you don’t go into your first time thinking you’ll be great at it. Hell, you won’t even like sex that much your first few times unless your partner is a sex demon or something.”

“I mean when Jungkook …” You shudder, “When he … I … you know, did things … it felt …” You fiddle with your fingers. Your ears were undoubtedly on fire, and you were so embarrassed saying these things out loud because it was just so awkward!

“Good? You know I’m not going to judge you for it,” she says pointedly, “That’s what friends are for, right?”

You flush, covering your face with your hands in embarrassment. You knew that Yena would never judge you for something as trivial and as unimportant as your sexual endeavours, but this was still a road you’ve yet to properly navigate yourself.

“I … came,” you wince at your breathy voice, “It felt good. And … he’s experienced, you know? I just don’t want to …”

Yena looks at you inquisitively.

“You don’t want to …?”

You sigh deeply, considering your next words with a soft murmur, “I don’t want to not live up to his expectations, you know?”

She frowns at you, “Jungkook’s made some mistakes but you said it yourself. He’s in love with you,” she says softly, “There’s no pressure to have sex with him just because it’s out in the open now, you know?”

You nibble on your lips.

“It’s … more than just that,” you tell her, “I told him I needed time, and really, I do. But it isn’t because I’m confused. I mean, kind of—but really it’s because I don’t want to walk into something and disappoint him … I’m just … scared.”

Yena holds your hand in hers while offering you a gentle smile.

“It’s valid that you’re scared. But there really isn’t anything that can come out of being scared right now. The two of you worked through an obstacle, and here you are creating another one that doesn’t quite exist yet. Trust me, when the time feels right, it does. And you’ll feel ready. Will you still be scared? Maybe. But it’ll feel like it’s meant to fit within your timeline.”

You nibble on your lips, “Is it bad that I’m overthinking this?” You wince.

Yena shrugs her shoulders, “Like everything else in your life?” She teases.

You whine, shoving at her shoulder playfully where all Yena does is snicker in response. You weren’t quite sure what you were expecting out of the conversation, even if it was vaguely about the ins and outs of sexual exploration. And she was right, you’ll always be afraid of something, whether it’ll benefit you or harm you because that’s what change does. It shifts your comfort zone into a space that may be unfamiliar but necessary.

You lean into Yena’s shoulder, and a wave of overwhelming emotion washes upon you when you look at her. You really didn’t know how you survived a time without Yena in your life. And as if she’s noticed your glassy gaze, she raises an eyebrow at you.

“What are you looking at?”

You grin at her, all teeth and gums on display as you hug onto her arm like a koala.

“I’m just really happy you’re in my life.” You sigh wistfully.

She pauses for one whole second before she snorts.

“Wow, talk about sex once and suddenly you’re in love with me?” She wiggles her eyebrows at you, “Tell Jeon and Kim that you’re mine now.”

You giggle, rolling your eyes.

“They’re not even competing in the same league as you are,” you assure her.

She smiles.

“So … does that mean I don’t need to get you a birthday gift?”

That earns a thwack on her shoulder.

[etherealeeknow]

chan really gave me anxiety from all the suspense. made me think hyunjin was gonna appear. then walked in wobbling like han jisung. only to reveal chanpool. i—

this man really knows how to put on a show AHHAHAHAH

no but imagine you're just sitting there in the living room when he's telling you his whole "deadpool special guest plan". he's rehearsing his "deadpool phrases" and you're just playfully judging him like "yknow im pretty sure deadpool isnt aussie. you're gonna need to do an american accent".

so he tries. but it's....the worst thing ever 😂😂 so you burst out laughing which makes him whine bcs "IM TRYING MY BEST HEREEEE T.T". so now you've got a sulking deadpool sitting on the floor with his legs outstretched and arms like a child in the middle of a tantrum WEARING A MUSCLE TEE bcs that's the only thing chan ever wears at home besides being shirtless.

you just stare at him and he's anticipating an apology or a few kisses so he's feel better but you just go "...yknow. your hair's sticking out from the back of the mask. maybe wear a hoodie to the live, yeah?" while trying to hold your laugh. and he gets even more whiny and hides his face in his hands.

"you're already hiding your face, genius. what's the mask gonna do?"

ok but how can this whole thing sound exactly like something chan and his s/o would do!!! 😭 i love it especially your last line skskdkdk.

and ig you’ve heard about the news today right? ryan sending chan his autographs and all. imagine chan lying in bed, smiling like an idiot and you’d be like, “look at you smiling so big. you know it’s all because of me. all my teasings yesterday got you an autograph and an official deadpool mask. you better pay me.” while plopping beside him. you expect him to ignore you because he’s too happy and head’s full with ryan, but no, he’d bearhug you and attack you with kissies. “i know! you’re the best. you’re chanpool’s best boy/girl and i love you so damn much!” — “oh? even more than ryan reynolds?” — “uh, don’t push your luck, baby.” alskdkdkd today it’s your time to sulk 😂

tmi tmi:

honestly i thought the guest was minhyuk ahahaha but then i read stays’ comments saying hyunjin hyunjin and i went like omg if it’s really him i’m gonna wail— but yeah we got deadpool-nim instead :D not that i’m complaining! he really made my night 🥺💞

[ikevamp-annalyne]

Hellooo!! I love your headcannons they are soo good CX. For a request headcannon, since its summer (omg its dying heat) can you do ikemen vampire suitor’s (like Mozart, Arthur, Arthur, Issac) reaction to MC wearing a modern bikini? I don’t think I’ve seen it requested before but it be interesting lol 🤧 and take your time on it you don’t need to rush it 😊

Hey there! Thank you for the request!!! TwT I am so damn sorry about the late ;; I am having a tough time personally speaking and I kinda don't have inspiration rn ;; so sorry for letting you all down T^T I hope you will like what I did so far-

Mozart:

"What are you doing, MC? What is that? You don't intend on going out like this, right?" He is shocked and blocks your room's door. "You're practically naked!" You smile while tapping his shoulder. "Mozart, this is a regular outfit in my time. It is called a bikini, a swimsuit. Showing this much at the beach or swimmimg pool is okay in my time." "Well, I am not okay with the others seeing you pretty like this!" He pouts and you find it adorable.

Leonardo:

"Wow, that's revealing, Cara Mia. What's that for?" You proceed to explain how women in your time wear these as swimsuit. He finds it very interesting and asks what do men wear. You tell him and with a grin, he removes all of his clothes, cut his panties into short size and then laughs. "Like these?" You are dying of laughter and kiss him before taking his hand and leading him to Comte's pool -he built one when you told him about pools in your time-

Arthur:

Shocking! He is shocked you dare walking in such revealing and short clothes when he should be the only one noticing. "Luv, why are you only wearing panties?" "Heh? These are not panties! It's a bikini! A modern swimsuit worn by women, mostly. In modern days, women can wear whatever the hell they want!" And he is left speechless at you walking in the mansion in this outrageously sexy thing. But he likes it, you know that.

Vincent:

Blushing baby angel finds you gorgeous and he actually wants to know more about fashion in modern days. He will try to paint some of these clothes you are talking about! You have fun introducing him to modern fashion and talk about how codes have changed -he really likes this, honestly- he will spend his time sketching you in your bikini and even paint you -Theo is happy he gets to witness his broer testing a new style-

Theodorus:

Paradox. He finds you stunning but he doesn't want anyone to see it. So he will get jealous and a tad too master-like. "There's no way someone else gets to see you like this!" "I am an independent woman and I do what the fuck I want, Theodorus!" Ouch. Calling his full name means you are furious. So he will apologise. But expect him to keep an eye on every resident and throw punches if they stare too much -except Vincent-

Isaac:

Blushing mess. At this point, you get worried about his well-being since he looks ready to explode. "Are you okay, Isaac?" "H-huh, yeah, I just, you just, you look magnificient-" you blush and hug him so tight he is on the verge of fainting -your almost naked body against him, you know...- he will protect you if other resident look too much but it means he is going to be teased non-stop... But he finds it worth it. He really likes modern fashion.

Jean:

Sweet darling baby angel, he will blush at first, then ask what is this, thing. You explain and he is very attentive. Even though it is far from his time fashion, he accepts it and will let you wear and do whatever you want. But he is always lending you his jacket to cover yourself after swimming -and hide your curves from some residents *cough*Arthot*cough*- and he will always be watching you from afar. In case you drown or need something.

I am so sorry for not doing all of them!!! T.T I will probably add them later on, if I find inspiration... I am again so sorry ;;

[astrhae]

tagged by the lovely @severelytinyeagle

1.Do you have a certain place at home for reading? my bed :)

2.Do you use bookmarks? no, the only paperback books i’ve read in the past three years are textbooks and they have no business touching my nice bookmarks aksldfksk

3.Can you stop reading or do you have to make it to the end of the chapter? i have to make it to the end of the BOOK. or the fic. :) these days, it’s mostly fics

4.Do you eat or drink while reading? i forget about whatever food/drink i brought after the third page :”)

5. Music or TV while reading? music! helps fill the stray parts of my mind so i can focus on the text without jumping around in my head

6.One book at a time or multiple? one book. although i have like twenty tabs of fic on my phone and even more ebooks i’ve read one page of but forgot to continue coz of life T.T

7.Reading at home or while out? everywhereeee, my parents have long since given up trying to figure out what i’m reading that keeps making me smile into my phone

8. Reading out loud or silently? silently, except when i’m memorising stuff

9.Do you read ahead or skip pages? listen my mind is incapable of not jumping around. i will skip paragraphs by accident and then get confused :/ and then scroll back up. sidenote: this is why i love non-linear narratives coz the story does the jumping around for my brain :D

10. Breaking the spine? e-books are a godsend, honestly, my city has no proper bookstore, so e-books it is. no risk of breaking the spine, but unfortunately, a risk of breaking my eyes x.x

11. Do you write in your books? i deface my textbooks with a lot of notes and doodles, but the paperback books i have??? no. my babies.

tagging whoever hasn’t been tagged before? i’m very bad at tagging but uhhh @maguna-stxrk @omg-just-peachy @ad1thi

[mawritesbnha]

THAT KISSING FOR BAKUGOU AND TODOROKI WAS SO SO SO CUTE AND IM DYING FROM HOW CUTE IT WAS AND I LOVE HOW YOU DESCRIBED TODOROKIS FACE AS OWLISH BECAUSE NOW I CANT UNSEE IT AND HONESTLY I LOVE IT AND THANK YOU FOR SHARING CAUSE I LOVE LOVED IT! Esp as someone who hasnt kissed before 😭😭 If you have time, and would like to, would you please consider doing the same request for Midoriya?? (i read your rules and saw you like Kaminari, Shinsou, and Monoma, so those too if you if you’d like please!)

Aaaaaahhh looove thank youu so much for your feedback it made me so happy T.T I really hope you’ll like this as much! I had fun writing it! Please don’t hesitate to give me your honest opinion!

(Thank you for reading my rules, might need to freshen them up a bit but yeah I love these boys )

Smoochies from Ma!

Izuku Midoriya

New at kissing:

broccoli boy is freaking out

will often mumbled incoherent things to himself to try and elaborate the best way to go about it (and some courage)

I think Deku really wants to kiss you and is gonna be really into kissing in general

not big open mouthed, all tongues out, sloppy and messy kinds of kisses

but sweet and tender little smoochies to show just how much he cherishes you

quick stolen pecks in public

and longer ones in private

does the cutest little noises and when he’s done kissing you he’s so red and so happy like a little puppy

uuughh it’s honestly the most adorable thing

but yeah before you get to that you’ll have to encourage one another to actually take that step

his anxiety is worse than yours so I guess it’d put you at ease?

but you know, if this goes on for too long, our dear zucchini baby is gonna get one of his surge of confidence and look at you with determination in his eyes before kissing you firmly but lovingly

he’s doing better than bakuboi sssshhhh

Already kissed someone:

still shy about it cause just because you kissed someone doesn’t mean you know how to kiss everyone

and he never kissed someone so important

but he feels like it’s his duty to take the lead and lift that weight off your shoulders

but honestly it looks like you’re doing him the biggest of honour and he asks so humbly like you’d be doing him a favour

gives you the feeling of being in charge without the responsabilities

and you trust him and his feelings for you so much, I don’t think you’d be all that stressed in the end

Denki Kaminari

New at kissing:

pikaboi isn’t gonna tell you that you’re his first

still clings to that smooth playboy style

you thought Izuku would be the one doing research on how to be a good kisser? WRONG, Denki did. Some thorough research he did.

sooooo many websites and forums…so many advices, not half of them actually helpful (cause there are no other advices than to just feel the moment, sorry dearies but you can’t prepare for your first kiss, listen to yourself and your partner, don’t overthink things, do what feels nice…okay maybe brush your teeth beforehand)

made a mental checklist

he’s got this

tries to do the old trick of asking you for a kiss on the cheek before turning his head at the last moment to get a kiss on his lips instead…

but his timing is bad and his movement too eager so you end up bumping heads

plays it cool by laughing it off before urgently going for a real kiss (before all his courage leaves him)

but forgets to slightly tilt his head to the side so your noses get in the way

at this point he’s a mess

it’s obvious he doesn’t know what he’s doing and omg do you hate him now? he’s so stupid

*cue you turning his pretty little head back to you and kissing him gently*

has the goofiest smile on his lips for the rest of his life the day

will definitely ask for another right away, probably going on about how you can’t resist him

Already kissed someone:

not as clumsy

still as goofy

Denki lives for kisses and can’t wait to kiss you

not much more to add here, you’ll still be a little anxious but his carefree attitude and his eagerness will sooth your nerves enough to take that step with him

also he’d slowly ease you into it by kissing you on your cheeks, forehead, nose, hands etc…

Hitoshi Shinsou

New at kissing:

aaaah physical affection with the purple kitty…

doesn’t want you to miss out on any ‘normal’ couple things

and he’s kinda curious about it as well

but he’s also really uncomfortable at the idea?

he isn’t used to that kind of proximity and as I’ve already mentioned once or twice, prolonged closeness and touch makes him restless

aaalsoo this poor baby is all about boundaries and consent, yours

overthinking things and worrying he’ll do something you won’t like

he isn’t worried about not being ‘good’ per se

really more about you feeling pressured and not having a good time and then kinda hating him because he’s a freak… (why am I so harsh on these boys? Scratch that, why are they so hard on themselves)

so yeah once again you’d have to get over your own angst and take the lead with this one

assure him of your trust and tell him how much you want it and he’ll finally comply

constantly on the lookout for your reactions and quick to adapt, Shinsou’s actually a pretty good kisser

Already kissed someone:

trust himself a bit more to not overstep or make you uncomfortable

will need less incentive from you before going for it

if you’ve been dating for a while and he sees you really want it, he might act a little smug about it

watch and learn Denki, Hitoshi knows how to be smooth

Neito Monoma

New at kissing:

I mean of course no one was foolish enough to get that close to judgy shit son

buuuuut he also knows how to be charming when he wants to sooo…

yeah you’re lost, you won’t be able to tell for sure whether you’re his first or not

and he won’t help

he might not outwardly lie about it but he’ll elude your questions

he’s not really self-conscious about it, a little bit sure, but he mostly loves messing with you

affectionately of course

it makes him feel important that you’d be so stressed about kissing him

so yeah sorry, not the best guy to ease your nerves

will face you, only a few inches separating you, but then wait for you to close the gap between your lips

smiling smugly

but if you look at his hands you’ll see that he’s holding them to hide the slight trembling

aawww he’s human

Already kissed someone:

ahh he’s a pain

forget about the trembling (unless he really loves you)

will basically act the same way

only he’ll tease you a lot more

whispering little things in your ear, making you both want to slap and kiss him

either way don’t worry he won’t make fun of you afterwards

he’ll just smile

a more genuine smile

[mingi-bubu]

Watch “Youth With You” with Me!

Episode 5 Part 1

- ook the episode highlights are making me go O.O; for the ladies so let’s see what happens eh?

- as always, Mr fruit is our lovely opening blueberry as Kun (I think) goes over how we can vote for our favorite trainees

- I so badly want to try the Fruit Milk Drink so if anyone knows how I can get that in the midwest states drop a line lmao

- also I know i’m posting this after but happy belated birthday Lisa!!!!  i’m very proud of you and all of the things you’ve achieved!

- was that girl holding a tinie Kun doll???  the legend jumped out

- her, not kun lakdjf;akldsjfakl

- whomst is this next to the lovely ella

- LISAAAAAA

- ELLA YOU LOOK FANTASTIC OH MY GOD

- Yoga Lin is so soft spoken but based on their responses i’m assuming he’s well known

- vegetable salad omg that is so cute

- YO!

- i’m v queer and kin, Lisa, and ella are severely testing my attention span rn T.T

- lmao i love that only ella and yoga and kun have to stay

- aaaaahhhhh leggo frahnm’s group!

- lol do y’all think that when ella mentioned the drink someone behind the camera where the girls were said “take a fucking sip babes”

-  all;dajd;lkf they’re me when i have to compliment someone

- yoga’s outfit pops tf off

- why does he have the same attitude as kun rn when talking to them alkdjfa;lkdsjfa

- wow this is  a plug.

- frhanm is that supportive group picker i want her to compliment me please

- oh i forgot to say what I'm eating!  it’s (not to sound too Pinoy) boy bawang chichacorn garlic flavored thank you

- anyway

- “we need to pass loveliness and warmth to others”  love that for them

- i think she would be a good leader ngl at least from her energies here

- this is so cute i love this little montage

- yan xia literally shut off her emotions so fast after losing the mic omg how incredible

- Zoe is so tinie!!!!

- so they really did call that group hickey, huh?

- this is very cute introductions i can’t wait to see the stage

- frhanm.  that’s it.  taht’s the comment

- omg that little peace sign scissors thing was adorable i loved it

- they look like a chorus of angels what the fukc

- wow i like when they’re all singing together their voices really mesh nicely

- Mr lin omg what a compliment wowowowoww

- HE DID THE HAND THING I TOLD YOU IT WAS ICONIC ELLA DID TOO 

- KUNNNNNN PLEASE DO IT

- HE’S SO BAD AT HAVING TO DO CUTE THINGS BABY BOYASLFIWEGFPOQIRWHG POQIUEHTR THAT WAS SO BAD I LOVE HIM WHAT A DORK

- frahnm really is like a leader already incredible

- that is an incredible distance between the last and second to last

- HOLY SNIPES IN THE HUNDREDS THAT QYUICK

- yessss we are impressed ma’am

- wow ok this is getting v emotional v quick?  i love that they have such strong bonds already

- i really like this group together

- love this montage of them!!  i hope in the future when ppl make those (un)helpful guides for the final nine that some of these gals are in that group !!!

- ok dance team time

- wow this looks like it’ll be an interesting and intense dance

- i love the worker alkdsfja;lkdsfj he looks so confused bitch meeee toooo

- I'm the two girls putting on makeup (k Lu looks so pretty and Xin is so iconic)

- Lisa looks so confused but i love her so its fine

- al;skdjfa;lkdsjf the hand binoculars

- is this where Lisa comes for blood please???

- please come for blood

- hhhoooop!  it’s not blood blood but there are some bruising

- and her lil squinty smile after!  I'm in love

- i forgot that kiki was the center aldkfja I'm sorry my love

- Lu is an inspiration wow 

- oh i like their outfits a lot

- their outfits and their confidence give me suju “shirt” w/the black and white outfits vibes

- space shuttle??  i love that for her

- kun is trying so hard to show that he’s not amused by this adlkas

- alksdjf;laksdjf bITCH KUN IS MAKING ME DIEEEEE

- jenny zeng has that effortless cool vibe on stage

- I AM LOOKING RESPECTFULLY

- this dance tho is very well executed i really like how they’ve made it their own

- the eye contact is a .  lot.

- i also really like the light staging in this as well

- I'm also them screaming thank you

- wow miss kiki with the kick to the camera i am.  looking.

- Lisa is so proud yay!

- rap Time rap time rap time!!!!!

- poor Mr jony j they poke so much fun at him aldjfaldksjf

- aaahh he looks so cool walking to meet the - and now he’s lost mee too sir

- ajdsfoiajdpofihaewoight i’’m so weak at everyone exposing themselves for who wanted to be there and who didnt

- alkdgj hahaha dad is speechless i cannnn’tttt

- i like the actual lyrics of their rap that they put together but it’s uh...obvious for some that they are not rappers

- nineone is staring intently

- AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MR JONY J I’M SCREAMING SWEETIE

- yes sir that is an accurate summary of what in fact did happen

- this is honestly the best part of the entire show right now is jony j struggling to explain this

- i really want them to perform well tho!!!  like even tho they didn’t want to be in the group and are not good at rapping i really want them to succeed

- i want to give everyone in that room some nice soup and bread bc i feel like they need some heartening foods after this

- nineone is literally like an exasperated mother alkdfja;lkdfja;lkdjf

- zhuzhentngs has been messaging with me during this and i have learned things about people and i am.   judging.

- oooh two days left i wonder how they’re doing

- AAAAHHHH IT’S ABOUT TO GO DOWN I AM EXCITEMENT

- “be excited properly” god what a mood

- i love the girl scout uniforms and name Shiny Girls

- sidenote to all of this but kun looks so good ddddayum

- oh their stage is so energetic!  its so cute i love this for them

- even if the actual rapping part of it doesn’t go well, i hope that they had fun

- this is a really fun song

- sa-wa-di-ka!

- she’s so cool ms. shaking please!!!!

- miss Ziyi du i love this for yuo

- ka-mo-ni-ka!!

- AAAHHHH THE LEGEND JUMPED OUT

- i’m really hyped for them i loved this a lot it was so cute!!!

- oh it’s good that jony j was proud especially after seeing how they started originally!!!

- i didn’t say it yet but bunny and shaking’s outfits are super cute

- shaking’s face alkdfja;kdlsfj i loved that she was like ‘bitch what the fuck?”

- wait what I'm confuxed

- it wasn’t who i thought

- whellp that goes to show how much and how well i pay attention aksdjf;alksdjf

- ok let’s see how “Fragments” goes.

- oh ok that’s the end of part one i didn’t haven't realize

[zpetra]

GP Helsinki Journal - Day 4 & 5

So, I am finally getting to this as well, it has been a while now but sorting through my pictures took me longer than I wanted and life didn’t exactly stop after Helsinki XD Please excuse.

After an incredible and tiring Saturday, I woke up after a few hours of sleep. While I had a generous window between arrival at stay and leaving the next day the excitement didn’t let me sleep. I woke up at 7 a.m, got ready, grabbed some left over sandwiches for breakfast and left to the arena shortly after 8 a.m. Since the first men’s group took the ice at 9 a.m and Keiji was in the group I had to make sure I was there on time. Luckily the line (at least when I joined) in front of the Ice Hall was fairly okay. Grabbed some water once inside and took my seat, greeting all the Japanese ladies once they arrived.

DAY 4 - Sunday

Group 1 practice - Keiji Tanaka

While I am sad he was not in the top to be in Group 2, I was also happy because now I could concentrate on him, without any further distractions (Mr. Hanyu).

I really like this costume on Keiji, he looked like a fairy-tale prince and while his practice did look wobbly here and there, especially his 3A, I was worried for him but I was rooting for him because he is a good skater and deserves good scores. I filmed his run-through and took more photos of him, he is really handsome, I have to say, also the ladies next to me said the same. So there is that. XD

Group 2 - when the TCC family walks in

Nothing can describe the sound of shutters of cameras going off when Yuzuru walks in but today he did walk in with Jun and boy.... I had an existential crisis who to film or take pictures from. I DIDN’T SIGN UP FOR THIS AMOUNT OF STRESS OKAY? I was so happy when I had both of them in frame XD

It was also incredible to watch how they navigate with the coaches, rarely did you see them standing by the boards or simply replaced each other once the other left and Brian and Ghislain had their attention on the current skater, not loosing a beat. Also I saw so much respect from Jun and Yuzu towards each other, making sure both get time to consult with their coaches, give them room on the ice. It reminded me of how Javi and Yuzu used to navigate around in the past. I had feels!!

At one point during the practice Jun choked on his water or spilled it and it ran down his chin, resulting in a giggle fest in our block, while my picture is blurry I can’t forget how embarrassed he looked and quickly made a run for it, I caught a glimpse of Brian holding back his own laughter. Jun is adorable, officially obsessed with him. Not like I wasn’t slightly biased towards him before but now, I am sold. SUPPORT THE BABE HE IS GOOD AND ADORABLE TOO!

I have to admit me filming Jun run-through was a disaster... I tried to film but also watch Yuzu and I may have lost Jun a few times, I don’t dare to re-watch the footage because WOW, I failed XD but I got a few nice shots of his jumps and I was overall happy with it, he looked good with a few mistakes and some butt-slides. I have pictures of some ice flakes on his booty, which he is trying to brush off. I APOLOGIZE. 

And than there is Yuzuru Hanyu. Just like the other days I was impressed, amazed and kept swooning. My view still couldn’t be quite beaten and god... I could write an essay of everything, it was overwhelming.

THE WAIST - that’s the comment, that is all I will say. It is ridiculous and every guy who sees it has to admit he looked good.

Filmed his free run-through again and it is scary how nearly identical it is to his actual program.

Watching Yuzu do his cool-down exercise is mesmerizing. Wow. I swear there is so much to see when he is on ice, he is so expressive both when he is disappointed with a jump, the ice conditions, really everything.

Men’s Free Skate Competition

Group 1

Oh boy, it was kind of heart-breaking as the guys were falling apart. Keiji fought hard but unfortunately... it didn’t look all too good for him to podium and my worry for Jun and Yuzu grew even more. Watching Keiji in the Kiss & Cry was so sad, I tried to be loud for him as much as possible because he FOUGHT. He did well!

Group 2

I never thought I would say this but it is INCREDIBLE AWKWARD TO WATCH HIS DEMONIC LIP SYNCING... Wow. I had second hand embarrassment but I am also a person who mouths along to music on public transportation so I could also relate. It was a weird feeling. Also Jun was so chill about it, he is probably over it, used to it. I was laughing so hard.

Mr. Hanyu came for murder while Jun looked like an adorable puppy and I was dying on the inside and outside.

BABY JUN DID SO WELL, HE DID SO WELL. I WAS SO PROUD OF HIM AND GIVEN HIS HIGHS SCORE I KNEW HE WOULD PODIUM; WHICH IN SO INCREDIBLE FOR SOMEONE WHO HAS BACK-TO-BACK GP ASSIGNMENTS ON DIFFERENT CONTINENTS!!! And it turned out he was having a cold and my respect and admiration flew out of the window! I regret not having had a plush for him, next time I will do better!

And soon it was going to be this guys turn... Origin hair *drools* I am sorry but living for it.

ORIGIN COSTUME IS LIFE! I swear to God, the pictures do not do it justice, they don’t but I am happy I got a fairly good costume reveal camera roll for myself - I posted it here  - BLING CITY

AND THAN MR. FUCKING HANYU SLAYED US ALL. I swear I was deaf for a moment, nor did I have voice afterwards. My fitness tracker yet again thought I was running, nope I was just that excited. I broke out in a sweat and was ready to take off my jacket because that Free was....

190.43 POINTS A NEW WORLD RECORD 297.12 COMBINED TOTAL ALSO A NEW WORLD RECORD

You do witness such incredible performances any day let alone in person. I was so damn happy I was close to tears. Followed by laughter because Yuzuru shook Pooh-san so hard in the K&C I thought he would lose his head. XD

I threw my pooh and managed to fling it into the general direction of the K&C and I hope I didn’t clonk the waiting coaches, have not seen footage so I guess I did alright? XD

I was ecstatic and so was everyone around me, the arena was shaking or at least it felt like so. Yuzuru Hanyu is incredible.

I felt a bid bad for Michal for skating after him because I felt the attention was not utterly on him but hey I was so happy I screamed for him like a madman, also he was AMAZING TOO. Group 2 slayed... aside from Boyang and Kolyada, those two had a bad day :(

THE VICTORY CEREMONY WAS SO CUTE! There is so much footage out there but it was adorable. Jun and Yuzu full on hug? Axel-ing onto the podium? Podium selfie? Michal switching to Japan because he had no flag but than got one from a fan and the crowd was so happy for him! GHISLAIN DROP THE SELFIE. The fact Jun kept his SCI flag? The way Yuzu happily shook his shoulders before his name was called. 

YUZURU HANYU MAKING THE SUN JEALOUS WITH HIS SMILE. FIRST TIME HE WON HIS FIRST GP ASSIGNMENT SINCE HE GOT TO SENIORS WITH 3 WR ON TOP. BOY!!!

My cheeks were hurting and just... I have to repeat but it was incredible. Truly.

I was high on adrenaline and the Gala was meant to follow. 

WTF WAS THAT GALA? I WAS DYING. IT WAS SO GOOD. The performances, naked Italians, Gaming performance feat the Russian male skaters? KEIJI!

FUCKING KEIJI TURNING UP THE CHARM AND MAKING EVERYONE SWOON. I am happy he did his smirk on the other side of the Kiss & Cry because I felt it from the distance and looking at the footage, HIS SMIRK AFTER!. He knew what he was doing that little shit. If I hear that song now all I see his Keiji charming everyone. Wow.

Helsinki gala was the best I have seen this season and I am not saying it because I was there! 

It all came down to Haru Yo Koi....

I am usually not an emotional person who cries but 3 tunes in and I couldn’t see shit. Even now as I am recalling, it is such an incredible program, the softness, the elegance the meaning behind it all, his soft smiles. I didn’t intend to film but ended up taking my phone out and while miss like 20 seconds from the beginning I think I did a pretty good recording of it, for myself to enjoy. I was fighting the tears and some did fall, me not being the only one. HYK is just...beauty. It’s pure beauty. 

And than during the Finale...>.> He does a LGC slide in the a fairy costume, runs his hand through his hair turning up the charm like Keiji did... wow, I felt attacked. XD I guess we also can’t have now a finale where this sunshine doesn’t get lifted. BUT HE WASN’T JUST LIFTED BY ONE BUT TWO IN A FREAKING MERMAID POSITION! OMG. HE WAS LIVING THE BEST TIME OF HIS LIFE AND I WAS LIVING FOR THAT! 

After the Gala I was hurrying away, somehow catching the first tram because it was late and I had to wake a few hours later to catch my plane back home. I ended up being so high on the excitement, I barely managed to catch like 2,5 hours of sleep. T.T It was worth it and I would do it again.

DAY 5 - Monday

Queue me dragging my ass out of bed after like 2,5 hours of sleep to finish packing, double checking I didn’t leave anything behind and leave to the train station. First train to the Airport leaving at 4:18am. I was so happy I ended up taking the day free because fuck I was done. Bought myself water and coffee , ignoring the horrendous price I had to pay for it... and off I went.

Security check-in was chill which I appreciated a lot, got a few souvenirs, had expensive breakfast and more coffee. Boarding started 10min before scheduled departure... guess which plane didn’t leave on time? ON ANOTHER NOTE: Nobuaki Tanaka the sport photographer who shoots at FAOI (is responsible for a gorgeous Yuzu x Javi picture) was on my plane! I tried not to stare too much LOL. Full plane, landing late somewhere in the middle of no-where. Rolling around for ages, followed by a long bus ride... train waiting time taking ages... It was like 11am I was home and I was dead. I wouldn’t have been able to go to work afterwards. 

Conclusion - Final thoughts:

IT WAS THE BEST WEEKEND OF MY ENTIRE LIFE AND BARELY ANYTHING WILL BE ABLE TO TOP THIS!!!!

I knew I will have an amazing time because I will see Yuzuru in person but I didn’t expect it all go down the way it did. Meeting so many lovely fans, the Japanese ladies giving International fans so many things, me too. Practicing my Japanese and happy it is actually any good. Watching Yuzu win his first GP assignment in a season, let alone 2 WR winning programs. Finding so many new amazing skaters I like now and want to support. It was truly amazing. Wort every single penny, lack of sleep, overflow of emotions. Best time.

Thank you to those who made it special, the members of our fangroup and people I have met in general. They all added to the experience. I know for sure that I will try to go to more events next season.

I guess all there is left to say... Until Europeans 2019 in Minsk. If anyone is going let me know! I am going to support Javi for his very last competition.

[florbexter]

My Dream the Series - Episode 3

Under the cut you can see my reactions while I watched Episode 3 My Dream the series. Please be aware that the following text will contain spoilers.

Episode 3

Part 1 - Part 2 - Part 3 - Part 4 

- Dear Runways Mum, if your son cries “Let me go” while he is in his room please tear the door down 

- She woke him up, thank god

- Dear Dream... I hate you, please go away

- The “I turn into a girl when I get wet” is still the funniest thing on this show

- Wait, so the guy in pink knows who he is, because he calls himself Elle, but the woman in pink takes the name Good gave her????

- Flashback Time

- Smitten Good is the cutest OMG

- Okay wow she totally lied about her name o.o

- Yay the boys

- Guide is such a nice friend T.T 

- XD Yim what kind of face is that haha 

- They think he had watched a porn before going to bed but don’t question the fact that Way dreamed of a man LOL bestest friends lmao

- GUIDE WANTS THE LINK!!! I am wheezing :D

- OMG Elle is going to eat the fish

- Wait.. why does Elle have another ring? I thought he gave him to Way?

- He tries Pizza for the first time, and of course he likes it - thats cute

- What kind of fancy ass school ist this?

- Oh no, he is meeting his dad in his dream... how sad T.T

- HIS DAD TURNS INTO DREAM!!! LIKE WHAT??? What kind of dream/non-dream stuff is this??

- ugh don’t call him crybaby, you are no longer a good presentation of Tuxedo Mask -.-

- another baby Way/grown-ass Dream scene... thats so weird and creepy, I just can’t

- YES! Tanai is here, and missed Guide again lol, gosh I love him on his motorcycle 

- “Right a boyfriend picking you up - wait till I have one???” EVERYONES GAY PEOPLE *yay*

- Question: why do they always leave the full drink and full plate? Please just don’t put food preps in front of them if they will not finish them :D 

- Guide tries so hard to please Yamai T-T

- Seeing your sibling in puplic and not pestering them??? NOT REALISTIC LOL

- TAKE THE DREAMCATCHER OFF

- Mum took the dreamcatcher off now little Runway cries and that kind of breaks my heart 

- Runway being lazy and always sleepy is a mood tbh

- OMG ELLE IN HIS CUTE TOP!!! What a look! I love it!

- Guide has the cutest smile

- Good is not a good liar lol

- soooo the ring is basically a cockblocker :D but good for Way to have something to protect him 

I am still very much confused about the Elle/Kafe situation, because apparantly they don’t really share the same mind? It’s more than just changing gender it seems. 

Guide is the cutest of them all and I love the Yim/Guide/Runway friendship. And Tanai my boy was his precious self, besides the weird way he wanted a kiss, as always Dream gets more creepy, but I assumed worse so... who cares about him lol. 

But nothing really happened in the ep. besides some shopping so hopefully the story will give us some answers in the next eps. 

[thatdamnokie]

today, i watched rocknrolla for the first time and kept a running tab of live commentary which can be found below the cut and is a stupid amount of ridiculous and will not make ANY sense unless you’ve also seen rocknrolla and like--have some vague memory of how the movie happens because this was all pretty much stream-of-consciousness or whatever.

yoooo i dig the opening song. okay. off to a good start.

for real thought the dark castle logo was hogwarts fml

is that… mark’s voice?

who is this muscular motherfucker?

LOOK AT THAT FUCKING BONG PIPE THING

that’s as tall as a toddler what the fuck

look at all these people in this movie!

THAT WAS MARK

mr. strong ladies and gentleman

… wait lenny looks super familiar, what else have i seen him in.

this all seems very complicated.

idris and gerard!

counselor’s cute too

why is everyone in this movie so fucking cute

WHERE ELSE HAVE I SEEN THIS GUY

every time mark speaks i jump

wait is that—gerard’s actual accent?

lenny, you are a terrifying dude.

and mark i want to ruffle your hair.

archie, that profile, sweet gracious.

… fuck he’s in the background and i just can’t stop looking at him.

this all sounds very, very complicated.

he calls him “len” omg

“do i look like a fucking immigrant” u h m

okay so pretty sure i don’t like lenny, they should just let archie be the leader

enter the russiannnsss

your sweater is dumb russian guy

i like his accent though

guys i don’t know enough about real estate hustling to be able to explain this to another person

aw sweet russian sweater man giving him his painting

… wait no camera man show me the painting

“whiskey is the new vodka” sure yuri whatever you say

lenny i can shoot whiskey better than you can you fucking bitch

dude you can’t hold your sauce can you?

archie

archie help him

fuck he is so handsome

that jawline

“famous archie smile” I WANNA SEE

dude you need to be nicer to people when whiskey makes you that sweaty?

… i’m sorry but i think i could outdrink arch’s boss???

bless whoever made mark narrator

yooooo stella!

i like her!

dude she looks boss as fuck

“i don’t feel like smiling”

dude a marriage of convenience where you don’t have regular sex sounds awful

“welcome to the—speeler?” did he say speeler?

tom!

some of the names in the opening credits didn’t look familiar but these faces do.

wait is gerard gay or was he making a joke?

that. accent. gracious.

just picture that growling in your ear. fuck, i want a british boyfriend guys. i mean it.

i like the color scheme of all this like everything’s—muted, but still classy?

okay i dig 1-2 and stella’s broship.

can you imagine just calling him twelve to save time

“just a black eye, nothing more.”

dude she has louboutins! or something like them! the ones with the red bottoms, i’m probably misspelling it.

hanging out at the country club. very classy.

arch, you’re all limbs.

… you’re also scary.

duuuuude he has a way of talking that just makes me nervous. like an undercurrent of a threat, things implied…

“in there like swimwear” i’m stealing that.

duuuuude lenny’s robe though?

i got office envy! look at that desk.

WHO FALLS BACKWARDS IN THEIR CHAIR

oh shit they took the painting

… that i still don’t know what it looks like, guys let me see it

len you are boned.

“and archie’s gonna have to go… to work.”

he is literally the tallest dude in every shot.

is he giving him slapping lessons rn.

… yes he is.

oh

oh

oh no

JESUS

ARCHIE

we do NOT HIT PEOPLE

gracious.

i’m torn because on one hand, that would probably really fucking hurt, his hands are probably as big as my fucking face

on the other hand—would i let mark strong slap me?

… maybe.

“but you keep the receipts because this ain’t the mafia”

idrisssss

fuck if he smiled at me like that i’d do whatever he said too

“everybody have fun tonight! <3” :D EVERYBODY WANG CHUNG TONIGHT

“now fuck off”

oh twelve

ugh all the style in this movie.

wardrobe goals.

i want that bag.

“… maybe.” bro you said that like you wanted the d, and i can’t say i blame you.

i like how yuri says london.

for a split second i thought that was tom holland???

ohhhhh what’s gonna happen now!

does everyone just like—drive mark around in these movies

OMG it’s the same money

this shit is hysterical

i want to mess his hair up. because if we were in public he’d probably hate it and tbh i’d be too scared to do it but maybe privately…

guys… i feel like i’d fit into the uk.

ohhhhh an INFORMANT

… oh that dude is cute!

oh that dude is CRAZY

oh, drugs, right. these are the drugs i do not do.

his name is TWELVE archie

see, he’s so good at being quietly threatening

his laugh is so… <3

i think ship stella and yuri—

oh FUCK i forgot she was married

he’s also gay as shit, yuri

dude she just got so sad…

“you devil”

oh duuuuuude

you want that v so bad and it is so obvious

they both have nice hands.

poor bob. :(

twelve you sweet scottish bastard.

OH

UHM

OKAY

that’s a twist.

twelve noooo

dude be cool

DUDE

DUDE THIS IS NOT HOW YOU HANDLE THIS

CALM DOWN

oh my god

duuuuude, twelve.

dude.

bob. bob honey i am so sorry.

is he crying? T.T

TWELVE DO SOMETHING

“no I’M FUCKING SORRY”

YEAH WELL YOU SHOULD BE

a—a poof?

is ‘poof’ a bad word?

guys i don’t know anything about british slang.

bob honey relax…

ohhhhh i’m not sure if that was a smart question to ask right that second.

archie, you’re so classy and wonderful and probably wouldn’t freak out on people like that. probably.

this van gentleman is so delightful ( i am so bad at names rn )

so his nickname is van gentleman.

TANK

there we go.

i like this broship.

in which arch continues to be all. fucking. leg.

OH SHIT

i was NOT PREPARED

“like most things american they’ve eaten the natives” i mean…

i really like his comparison of the crayfish and greed, but like… i also really want bbq now… (have you HAD bbq crayfish? shit’s delicious.)

also HOLY SHIT was not expecting them to be stuck on him like leeches? that’s terrifying.

archie has like—this hidden mercy about him… like he got a weird look on his face and i couldn’t tell if it had to do with the quid dude or putting the other guy back in with the crayfish.

it’s his STEPSON?

ohhhhh an american!

oh he is handsome.

mickey. <3

what else have i seen this rocker dude in…

“ladies of the pole”

mickey’s hat ftw

oh this fedora guy is cute.

JUNE

i love that name AND her bangs!

this movie was a phenomenal soundtrack

aaannnddd definitely thought that dude was masturbating for a second

wait is that the guy from the beginning?

LENNY

... wwwooooowwww

lenny is an ASSHOLE

LENNY

johnny, johnny honey you do not deserve this

why is this movie full of people who deserve better than they got???

LENNY don’t you DARE

that is NOT OKAY

FUCK YOU

gosh, kid, bless your heart…

SHOW ME THIS FUCKING PAINTING

there are so many different accents in this movie and all it’s doing is confirming the fact that i never left my “i want a boyfriend with a nice voice” phase

“guns nuns and cowboys” idk what this bonanza thing is but i’m in

johnny you are very scary and i’m sorry that your stepdad made you like this.

dude stop touching june?

“it’s tasty and exotic—a bit like your june.” lenny you’re disgusting.

that’s an intense line of questioning, lenny.

this fucking painting.

ARCHIE

STOP FUCKING WITH THE MICROPHONE

oh my god

i literally just want him to never stop talking

omg bob.

dude twelve looks piiiiiiissed.

i think… i missed a part of the plot.

guys i want to be a part of this world but i’m only able to say that because no one’s very asked me to like… torture someone.

or sleep with someone gross.

victor you handsome bastard.

russian is such a guttural language i love it

FUCK YOU LENNY

at least you’re getting better at shooting your whiskey? fucking asshole.

like i like him less and less because he’s just GROSS you guys

jk could still outdrink him.

if you touch archie lenny i will reach through his screen and rip your face off.

i really wouldn’t be threatening someone who could snap you in half but okay

who the hell is cookie?

COOKIE

you look like a one-many party

omg where are your pants

cookie

cookie i love you you disaster of a man

omg i want to be invited to one of these parties

like just let me relax in a corner with an old fashioned and a cute boy

OHHH THEY FUCKED

OH

OKAY

that explains a lot

dude bob that’s—okay but like they thought he was going to prison, that was just an accident

wait does archie know?

dude stella i want to be your friend so you can help me with my wardrobe

… twelve. twelve what are you doing.

stella looks so fucking unimpressed

YEAH BECAUSE SHE DOESN’T KNOW WHAT YOU’RE DOING

dude, stella, girl, i’m sorry

at least one of you can dance

oh bertie you gay as shit

stella why did you marry this man

i like this closed captioning thing they’re doing.

who. is. the. informant.

“and remember—i *am* dangerous.” yes you are baby.

bertie you are so awkward

bob. bobby no. D:

BOB

oh bertie don’t act like you didn’t like getting bossed around i saw it in your face

y’all he is fucking ENAMORED

i’d go see this guy live.

that bouncer wasn’t fucking around. one hit knockouts.

… john. johnny. what are you doing

JOHNNY DO NOT STAB THE BOUNCER

HE IS MAKING ME SO NERVOUS

HOLY SHIT

JOHNNY

ALL RIGHT COOL LET’S JUST SHANK THE BOUNCER

johnny you are batshit crazy

“fucking mutt” wait, what does that mean?

mumbles is a handsome man.

ohhhh this is an awkward conversation.

“made a pass.” right.

ohhhh. oh he knows.

twelve, dude, i’m sorry.

he looks so uncomfortable.

but hey like this means they didn’t fuck so that’s a thing?

boooob, sweetheart. <3

they’re all such good mixes of good and evil.

except lenny. fuck lenny.

ooooo that lady has pretty hair.

oh wait THAT’S cookie?

then who was pantsless homie?

this movie has such a big cast and i can keep track of like four people.

this club lounge place looks cool though.

he helped him get off the rock? that’s pretty rad.

p.s. this movie has a great soundtrack tbh.

all the same kiddos maybe just stick to weed and the occasional hallucinogens

say no to cocaine and crack

oh, johnny. :(

buddy.

holy SHIT this guy’s scars though!

DUDE

how many scars do these russian guys HAVE

… ADJNSJANSOAPSLKKJADSM

TRAIN

OKAY

WAIT NO TRUCK

JESUS

… more scars i guess?

… wait i wonder if archie has scars like that?

ohhhhh noooo yuri.

yuri did your friends die?

LENNY you’re racist and i do not like you.

oooohhhh why do i feel like so many bad things are gonna happen in the last part of this movie.

twelve you’re limping my baby who hurt you

… oh

OH

THAT is who hurt you

also i ship those two russian guys

i like how stella was apparently just watching the entire thing from a distance

and then has the audacity to critique him lmfao

holly shit right into a STOREFRONT

dude NONE of y’all are having a good day

this entire scene is fucking—something else

guns

knives

golf clubs

just

anything you can pick up and use as a weapon at all

WHAT THE FUCK

ARE THESE DUDES JUST INDESTRUCTIBLE

“ABANDON SHIP RUN FOR YOUR LIVES”

YEAH BITCH AGREED

OH SHIT COPS

BOB ARE YOU JUST GONNA WAVE LIKE THEY’RE YOUR BROS

THIS IS STRESSFUL

PARKOUR

bob you look like a puppy

and twelve looks like a zombie

and then there’s mumbles who just stole the coolest bike helmet i’ve ever seen

twelve, honey, you just can’t catch a break

dude russian guy is fucking RIPPED

kudos to who did the cinematography of this because it looks fucking cool

this is the slowest high-intensity chase i’ve ever seen

ripped and covered in blood. i dig it.

twelve you faker

oh hi ruskies

archie do you own any clothing that’s not black, grey or blue…?

fuck i love that jacket, but it’s so long it just makes him look even taller

LENNY

YOU NEED TO NOT BE SO FUCKING RACIST?

and get your hands off his testicles!

gracious.

everyone in this movie needs jesus.

johnny stop calling him pedro.

can…. can i see the painting please.

please.

guys.

this poor scottish guy.

yuri got cake.

johnny… sorta reminds me of freddie mercury in some of these shots? for like a few seconds at a time.

… okay so i’m full of dread between this monologue and what’s happening on the golf course.

lenny. buddy. you really got like. not do that. stop calling everyone immigrants

OH SHIT

GET HIM

GET HIM VICTOR

YOU GO BABY

this is a weird juxtaposition in terms of scenes though?

like

lenny getting his legs beat

and johnny’s super sad speech about the cigs

dude i can’t bring myself to feel bad for len.

wait where’s archie?

“and that is also why i cannot give that painting back.”

this is a set up for something really really bad.

and then they have moments where they act like dudes i know and i warm up to pete and johnny.

bobby stop fucking with that poor man. you’re gonna make him fall in love with you.

“i’m going back to bed.” “can i come?”

*smack* okay, that shit was funny.

johnny you need some chicken.

oh these motherfuckers.

… guys i wanna be a rocknrolla

lmao a protest

that flat looks disgusting.

dude you need to treat your bro better

ASJANSJASN

THEY TOOK THE PAINTING

CAN I SEE IT

LET ME SEE THIS FUCKING PAINTING

OH MY GOD THIS IS GREAT

if this movie ends without me seeing this fucking painting i’m going to kill someone

good man cookie.

TANK’S WATCHING P&P

COOKIE YOU DA REAL MVP

gerard’s laugh though

OH

… well then

like if she wasn’t so unhappy in her marriage i’d feel bad

THE INFORMANT YES TELL ME

… sydney shaw?

“where did he learn a word like pseudonym?”

awwww he likes her…

oh she likes him!

okay good because that sex didn’t look romantic at all.

“you’ve got very good taste mr. one-two.”

lenny fuck you.

you’re gonna be alive for like three more years, relax.

archie. <3 that protectiveness—even if it is for lenny.

aaannnnddd enter the russians.

what a clustfuck.

wait TWELVE

DAMNIT TWELVE

OPEN YOUR EYES

… oh you are FUCKED

ooosajdnaksdjnajsdna this is anxiety-inducing

y’all this is why drugs are bad

and then nice outside scene. birds chirping. looks like a lovely day.

oh shit ARCHIE WITH A GUN

there’s no way that twelve is still alive

what the FUCK

am i SEEING

dude archie, me too

omg ARCHIE HELP HIM

that SMILE

dude i’d laugh too

OH

OH SHIT

welp.

okay, we all figured archie was gonna kill people

put your FUCKING TONGUE BACK IN YOUR MOUTH

wait he SHOT TWELVE?

omg everything is happening at once.

wait, stella, what’d you do?

OMG

dude she looked FREAKED OUT

yuri… dude, what are you doing…?

UHM

WHAT

WAIT

WHAT IS HAPPENING

STELLA YOU LITERALLY FUCKED TWELVE LIKE A SECOND AGO

ohhhhhhhhhh

ohhhhhhh noooooo

ohhhhh NOOOOO

oh stella, honey you in danger girl

archie looks a thousand percent done and he’s been around this kid thirty seconds

wait archie was in prison?

this sydney shaw person put arch in prison…

duuuuuude younger!archie ;-;

“uncle arch” T.T

WHAT the fuck, lmao

just whipping out his gun, nbd

archie stop that. they’re babies.

johnny man you’ve—been fucked up for a while.

dude archie you look miserable.

ohhhh nobody died.

THANK YOU ARCHIE

GET HIM

i hate this entire family.

who all is about to die in this weird basement silent hill place.

… dude. johnny’s face though.

like i’ve felt like NO sympathy for lenny this entire time but i feel bad for johnny. :/

“a hot bath and a cold razor”

… dude

“because you’re poison john.”

o u c h

but like he is CRAZY

like

help i don’t know who to feel for

i feel for everyone

… except lenny

OH SHIT

WHAT THE FUCK

LENNY

JESUS

DUDE

HE IS GOING TO KILL HIS OWN STEPSON

what the fuck is happening.

YES THE INFORMANT

wait.

WAIT.

IT’S FUCKING LENNY????

OH MY GOD

“you are a VERY dirty bastard sydney.”

WHAT THE FUCK

WHAT

THE

FUCK

NO

STOP KILLING EVERYONE

I CANNOT DEAL WITH THIS

NO NO NO NO  NO NO NO

NO NO NO NO THIS ISN’T WHAT I WANTED

this is STRESSFUL

“put your hands up!”

*thud*

okay that was funny

THE BOYS!

oh, archie.

oooohhhhh… all this shit…

archie. fuck, you can hear the betrayal in his voice.

shit, this is sad.

“there is no spring without a winter. no life without death.”

… archie?

oh a time skip!

oh SHIT johnny got a GLO UP

“c’mon then give us a cuddle”

i’ll GLADLY you give you a cuddle

OH MY GOD THE PAINTING

SHOW ME

S H O W M E

… you literally put those russian guys in pieces, didn’t you archie.

you terrifying motherfucker.

GUYS I WANT TO BE IN THIS WORLD

FUCK YOU GO GET THEM JOHNNY

... wait was there supposed to be a sequel?

… WAIT

WAIT  NO

NO

YOU FUCKING SHOW ME THAT GOD DAMN PAINTING

oh my god.

fuck it.

fuck that.

nope.

like mid-credit scenes are the least y’all can do.

… wait is that tom and gerard just like fucking with each other, it might be, that’s sort of adorable.

dude that gay club looks like fun though.

i don’t dance because i’ll spill my drink but.

awwwww guys i could watch them dance forever, like, this shit is funny.

ohhhh i hope this means that archie becomes the new lenny. he’d be a much better lenny.

and now we sway to this groovy end credit music while i sit and seethe in hatred that i never saw the painting and i’m pissed about it. :))))))

… fuck.

welp, guess i’ll just have to write shit about how the fuck this dude falls in love with a cop then.

[feuqueerfire]

His - I Didn’t Mean To Fall In Love + His (The Movie) Live Blogging

The movie vs drama and prequel vs sequel thing about this series (?) was confusing to me but after a minute of researching, I think His: I Didn’t Mean To Fall In Love is a 5-episode drama that was released in 2019 and then His (the movie) was released in 2020, which is the sequel. 

I kinda read the summaries for them on MDL, so I have a vague idea of what it’s about. Hope my streak of actually liking the Japanese BLs I watch continues with these!

His - I Didn’t Mean To Fall In Love

Episode 1 (June 22)

This takes place in March 2006 and the Viki comments talking about how they were born like a few months or a year after like T.T aren’t you all children? But no, a 2007 baby is now 15. omg people born in 1980s and before also commenting :0 so cool. 

lmfao? Our guy is certainly not having a good day, first his dad leaves for 10 days for work as soon as he gets home, then he’s saddled with some guy’s (love interest lol) surfboard to look after, then he falls into the water, then gets slapped because a girl thinks he stole the surfboard T.T

lmfao the girl’s parents talking about how the dad snuck into the mom’s bed when he first stayed over at her house

I freaking like the girl and her mom’s banter and dynamic and how they don’t quite get each other

I keep calling her girl but her name is Chika

Shun and Chika standing side by side staring at Nagisa waxing the board lol

I don’t have much to say, it’s just so soft and sleepy even though like i have some thoughts (like Chika putting her plaque with her and Nagisa’s name over the plaque of Nagisa and his gf?!)

Ako is freaking cute

Nagisa’s pretty but I don’t really get why so many people like him. Though him coming to Shun to have him go surfing is cute

Episode 2 (June 22)

Lol slightly older girls seem to like Nagisa, his gf’s in university. Though I wonder how much older she is than him? She could just be 2 years older but also like 4 lol. She’s not wrong for wanting him to wear the jewelry she buy him or give her something for White Day though. He just seems freaking unfeeling but maybe that’s got to do with the fact that he maybe doesn’t like women

I like Chika and Shun’s friendship

lmfao Nagisa staring at Shun’s bare back while they’re changing out of their wetsuits but the obvious way he looked away when Shun caught him is hilarious

the flip phone lol

Nagisa’s so awkward T.T The way he gave Shun the keys to ride the bike and then ran away

alkdjf not Nagisa calling Chika’s phone and her being excited but he actually wants Shun, rip Chika

like... Nagisa’s gf isn’t wrong, he really isn’t treating her well (like just ignoring her calls) + bringing a friend to a serious conversation. She’s not being unreasonable. I hope they just break up right now.

Nagisa’s so ?? He’s so bad at communicating lol and freaking rude

aklsdfj D: Erectile disfunction at the hotel bomb dropped?! In front of Shun too T.T sooo awkward I’m dead

Chika stalking Nagisa & Shun and having Ako tag along with her lol

woah cute ass scene of them finding Nagisa’s keys. Nagisa was flustered but Shun kept smiling and looked sooo beautiful fr

The comments say that Nagisa’s using Shun’s shampoo but why would his shampoo even be there?

Woah it’s been clear Nagisa likes Shun this episode but it’s wild how much he’s like vibrating out of his skin with it. The way he’s sniffing Shun and trying to get closer to him while Shun’s sleeping. I thought Shun would like Nagisa, esp with the initial photos he took at the beach, but seems it’s the other way around

Episode 3 (June 22)

akl;sdfj Chika lying down in Shun’s makeshift bed and smelling it because she thinks that’s where Nasiga slept

T.T I knew they’d make Ako like Shun (he’s freaking nice to her, as he should be because she’s sooo cute) but I don’t want her to get hurtttt

Me hoping Chika and Ako would get together is fruitless lol I definitely would’ve heard if there were gay girls in this

Sometimes Shun bites his lower lip after laughing (Ep 2 after finding the key, here in 8:21) and it’s aksldfj beautiful, not awkward/cringe because it’s not meant to be like sexy

Nagisa accidentally drinking from Shun’s can (and Shun deciding not to tell him), Nagisa letting him borrow The Talented Mr. Ripley and asking to let him know what he thinks, Nagisa buying Shun absurd amounts of candy >.<

loll the mom thinking Chika likes Shun. The mom’s so cute and excited tho lmfao rip

Naurrr mom and dad discussing how Chika probably likes Shun right in front of Nagisa while Nagisa himself likes Shun as well and whole times Chika actually likes Nagisa. I’m liking these complicated love lines, especially if we put in Ako’s actual crush on Shun as well. 

Aak, Nagisa hearing Chika and Shun discussing Ako emailing him. rip Nagisa mans got hit with 2 of Shun’s possible love interests in the span of Minutes

alksdfj okay what a conversation. Nagisa mad/jealous -> Shun asks Nagisa what he thinks of Chika -> Nagisa: do you like her? -> Shun: sure -> Nagisa: She likes you too so congrats. -> Shun ?? tf she doesn’t like me, she likes you, she told me to keep it a secret. -> Nagisa: smug and relieved 

girl this legend of the monk and the boy ? O.O Nagisa sure chose a hell of a story to introduce the ~2 boys~ idea in Shun’s mind lol

Bro in certain angles Shun looks So Much like Win Metawin to me

Awww rip Nagisa. N: Would it gross you out if a boy liked you? S: Idk if it’d gross me out. I can’t even imagine it.

Bro those dumplings look so freaking good, I want

omg I love these parents. Mom was ready to have Chika driven over to stop Shun and Ako’s date so that she can win Shun back, I’m dead

Are... Ako and Shun playing a game or something on their date? Staring contest?

Naurr Nagisa suddenly kissing Chika just to forget about Shun. it’s not fair to her and she’s just gonna get hurt more in the future </3

Episode 4 (June 22)

oh lol Ako was just showing Shun how quickly she can cry because of her acting class

my mouth dropped open, no way Chika said “you should go out for dinner with someone or maybe try changing yourself a little” to her coworker guy who clearly likes her. I’ve decided I’m gonna be ignoring most age gaps in Japanese shows (after Nagisa’s older gf + lol currently waiting for Minato Shouji Coin Laundry) but other than that this guy seems freaking nerdy and earnest, that can be cute (esp in a show). Chika certainly doesn’t have to like him back or even like him as a person but that was so rude. Seems like she has similar traits to Nagisa’s ex herself 

these parents kill me actually lmfao their opinions on Nagisa (lol playboy) and them going to a love hotel ?!

nooo Nagisa randomly hearing some strangers’ casual homophobia among friends 

rip at least seeing Ako and Shun on their little date not date is cute but Nagisa and Chika’s is just rip because Chika’s being lead on and is gonna get her heart broken while Nagisa’s being an asshole leading her on but also is struggling with sexuality and also unrequited love based on gender (for now)

Crying, her parents got her condoms as a gift?! I think these parents are actually on Pete’s father from Dark Blue Kiss’s level and possibly even higher just based on how much screentime they get + their personalities + their caringness for their daughter and Shun and Nagisa

Ako is so beautiful

Shun and Ako in that acting class acting out their narrative in this story (A asks him to be her bf, S says sorry I like someone else) is interesting!

Nooo Ako crying because Shun’s leaving soon + also she realizes he doesn’t like her back

I like this random kid with all his playfulness and recorder at Nagisa and Shun’s part time job

dang Shun thanking Nagisa while outside his door and mans isn’t even in his room rip

Dude, this show has such interesting conversations and dynamics, the conversation between Nagisa and Chika’s coworker tree-lover guy was so good, esp with how they didn’t know who the other was

The sequences of events in this show are just so good? The Nagisa and Chika conversation where Nagisa’s like “Do you like Shun? It’s crazy to be worried about that isn’t it?” as Nagisa’s running off to see Shun and Nagisa’s like “It’s not crazy. As far as I’m concerned, it’s perfectly normal.”

1 more episode, I guess everything has to unravel now. Rip all the hurt 

Episode 5 (June 22)

Dang Nagisa fr is an asshole lol just does not give a fuck about Chika chasing after him and almost getting hit by a car

lol mom’s got it I think that Nagisa likes Shun

One of the best parts of this show is all the different characters and their interactions and conversations like right now Nagisa’s ex (she’s 3 years older apparently) and Chika are talking about Nagisa right now.

Yo this is actually so good because Nagisa’s ex doesn’t know that Chika knows and is “dating” Nagisa, so she’s just divulging all this information about him, including the fact that he probably likes the guy he brought to their last meeting (Shun - she picked up on it fast), and Chika has some realizations

rip does Nagisa my guy just not have Shun’s email or phone number lol Also Shun’s not leaving for 2 more days right? I guess Nagisa’s just not thinking straight 

The Viki comments sometimes piss me off because why are some people so mean about Chika for no reason, she has a right to be upset that the guy she likes who kissed her first + went on dates with her has liked someone else this whole time. It’d be one thing if she was being homophobic or trying to dictate how Nagisa should behave but she didn’t do that

Bro I love the mom’s breakup recovery advice letter, love Ako accompanying Chika to fulfill it, love the random garbage collector taking away the bone (representing Nagisa) in a box as trash (which he is - to them at least). This reminds me slightly of how after Sean rejected Name in Not Me, they showed us a scene of her crying to make us feel empathy but we didn’t know or care for the character enough for it to work (I was like oh no is she gonna turn bad?). This series did a more successful, charming version of that.

[About Nagisa liking Shun and Shun possibly liking him back] Chika: “So you mean we’re both part of the same tragedy?” Ako: “I’m not sure if this is a tragedy or a comedy.” Well it could certainly be romance if the two of you realized you like women and got together but that’s just wishful thinking and also wouldn’t be good to shove into the story right now. I’m just glad they’re such good friends to each other

Ako and Chika are both so freaking beautiful my gosh

Fuckk Nagisa talking about being gay and it’s just so much internalized homophobia :<

Aw he moved here because the rumours of him being gay spread at his old school

rip Nagisa talking about how he tried dating girls because he might end up liking them but couldn’t. Rip Chika’s heartbreak too

loll Ako’s camera had film, at least when she took photos of Nagisa. I wonder if she added it after her conversations with Shun or if there was film all along

Something about Nagisa discussing Shun with Chika and Shun discussing Nagisa with Ako is cute. The girls being like eyeeeee think you should tell him though they say it differently - Chika: >:(, Ako: ^.^

woah Nagisa’s the first person Shun likes

:0 nooo Shun deleted the photos he took of Nagisa at the beach on the first day

Chika’s disdain for guys is fucking funny

the confession happening in the last 2 minutes of the series ?! lmfao and the sequel movie starts with a fuckton of angst I believe?

Nagisa: Ever since the day I met you, I’ve liked you. Shun: It’s the opposite for me. The more time passes, the more I find myself liking you.

Bro cute, romantic, desperate ass hug at the end.

The best parts of it are: 

the parents, they rival and might win over Pete’s dad in terms of best BL parent(s), especially the mother. They weren’t the parents of either of the guys but they still cared for them + their daughter Chika and had personalities and were involved in their child’s life + was supportive of her. 

the characters in general because there are a handful but they’re all important and interact with each other and serve a purpose and it’s definitely one of the best uses of characters in a BL I’ve seen. 

Very different from most BLs in that although Shun and Nagisa have cute moments and plenty of interactions so that you can feel how Nagisa likes Shun, there are many scenes where they aren’t present at all and the story and characters are still being progressed. Usually when a show focuses on not the main couple, it’s on the secondary couple but this show is one cohesive unit where each person plays a part in moving this one story forward. Good choice since it’s such a short show. I thought Chika and her parents, Ako, Nagisa’s ex, Chika’s coworker were all freaking well-built characters and served their purpose well, I liked their interactions between each other (there were so many) and with Nagisa or Shun.

I don’t know if I’ll think about this show often and I wish they actually dated in the show for a bit. Also would’ve liked to see some more of Shun actually liking Nagisa, even if he doesn’t realize it. It’s weird that one of my criticisms is that I wish Shun was a bit more well-developed when I think all the side characters were really well developed for their roles and short runtime. 

Onto the movie tomorrow, can’t wait for the heartache.

Rating: 6.5/10

His The Movie

Okayyyy, time to start this I guess. I wonder if we’ll get any of their high school cuteness at the start or if we’re jumping straight into the angst because we also got 0 established relationship in the series. Also, I learned today that the actors in this are different than the series ones which makes sense since they’re almost a decade older but hmmm. Aside but I was looking at the poster for Kimi no Koto Dake Mite Itai and realized that the guy who played Nagisa is in that.

June 23

Bro what a fucking beginning. Cute, adorable, domestic, teasing waking up scene that ends with “Shun, let’s break up” and it was just a dream of the past. 

Bro this movie is so calming so far but it makes your heart ache. 

Cute ass child. 

The guy who plays Shun is still beautiful but I miss the original Shun from the series, some of his mannerisms were really attractive to me lol

Anyway, how are you supposed to react if your first love comes back to see you with his child and tells you about how he married and got divorced etc and his reason for coming is just... “Somehow I wanted to see you.” and says what you had in the past is so long ago

lmfao Shun having to witness Nagisa be a good father to his adorable girl and also now the rumour mill has started that maybe something’s going on between Shun and Nagisa, rip Shun he wants it to be true so bad

“When these things happen, try to enjoy the inconvenience rather than get upset.” That’s so interesting. Enjoy the inconvenience. The woman’s nice!

This slice of life thing where it’s just daily life + meeting people is actually so nice

Nagisa left his child with Shun without even telling him to go on some urgent business?! Bruh, Shun has no experience with kids, I’m dead. Also, flashback to Shun’s dad leaving so soon after Shun went to visit him in the series lol

Sora just leaving the store lmfao?

lmfao dying at their dinner being 15 million egg dishes

Shun learning to take care of Sora bit by bit T.T

Shun kept Nagisa’s letters and sweater </3

Nagisa’s so fucked up, mans is drunk and tryna kiss Shun rip. I guess his conversation with the people in Tokyo who kept talking about how Sora needs both a mother and a father (and not to be raised by 2 men lol) really got to him (but also he’s just a general asshole, even in the series, so)

Fucking crying at them making food and having a meal with the hunter old man and also each saying that the other turned them into a bookworm

this Christmas tree scene is so cute

Dang, Sora got taken away in a dang minute

This really reminds me of how Itou Akira marrying the girl and wanting to be normal and the conversation with their wife, though with the added child + cheating with men

Yeah, selfish is the word for both Akira and Nagisa but like... I mean... yeah. I forgive it each time because I’m more in awe of their courage to at least finally come out years later

I feel for Sora’s mother: she finds out her husband’s gay and never loved her, he literally takes their child somewhere else randomly, has to work and also take care of the kid now whereas I don’t think she has much experience raising Sora, is facing her mother’s disapproval, and now is battling custody. I hope she considers that while she could work fulltime and take care of a child with the use of like daycare and help from her mother, Sora’s dad has been taking care of her this whole time and should still be able to. Is shared custody not an option? It’d be good if they could come up with the best solution for the child (though idk how Sora’s education would go if they have shared custody since Nagisa’s gonna live at the countryside with Shun for the foreseeable future - maybe weekday vs weekends & holidays?)

So interesting to see all this divorce prep and custody battles in this BL, especially the discussion of how Nagisa’s gay relationship will affect it

“Because if I stay with Mama, I get in the way of her work” T.T Aw Sora

Misato confessing to Shun but probably understanding 2 minutes later that he’s with Nagisa lol

lmfao as soon as they started looking at each other with those eyes I was like whelp, hope you’re ready to explain everything to Sora and yep, there her little head is watching them make out. At least they hadn’t taken any articles of clothing off yet

Oh lol little child was so out of it with sleepiness, cute

D: oh no, Sora’s insisting upon seeing Nagisa and Shun kissing to her classmates really loudly in front of everybody. And that’s when Shun comes to pick her up aklsdfj

You know what, I need a break lol I don’t wanna watch Sora ask Shun if he’s kissing her dad in front of all the kids and elderly 

June 23

Okay, I’m gonna have lunch and just... watch it. It probably won’t even be too bad, I was just too anxious yesterday

As I expected, they didn’t show the reactions after Sora asked Shun in front of everybody. However, now Shun and Nagisa are talking about one of them leaving the town and </3. At least Nagisa’s like “yeah, I was only thinking about myself when I left you, when I missed you, and also when I came back.”

rip Shun’s flashback to having to deny being gay at a work party T.T

kind supportive old grandpa :)

NOOOO he’s died?

Aww sweet Sora, reassuring Shun 

I was gonna be like D: Shun, coming out at somebody’s funeral and making it about you?! (+ also omg sooo public) but I guess the old man might approve

Bro Shun’s speech is sooo awkward for me to watch bye but I’m glad everybody was nice

T.T Shun coming in wearing Nagisa’s old sweater from the beginning of the movie and saying “I want to spend my life with you... you, Sora-chan, and me.” 

naurrrr Misato started off so well but the lawyer using societal homophobia + leading questions to get her to mess up alksdfjaskdlfj >:(

Why isn’t the fact that Sora literally left her home and was at the police station under her mom’s care not being brought up at court?

omg screaming at the cuteness of the contrast of this time Nagisa finding Shun high-fiving Sora after cracking an egg with one hand

Bro yeah idk how these people are managing to do the witness stand like I’m sitting here and thinking “Oh Shun shouldn’t say that he lost sight, he should mention that Nagisa said he was Sora’s main caretaker, so Shun trusted him to know what’s good for her.” or smth but I would’ve 100% started crying

Sora’s so cute and innocent T.T 

Bro I’m like both mad at Sora’s mom because being drunk and neglecting a child so that they leave the house and get lost and ask for father at the police station is unacceptable but like... doing everything she wants to do (job + raise Sora alone) is very difficult, so I sympathize. Also like she’s being labeled as a “bad mom” because of how she little time she spent with Sora or the lack of chores she did and stuff but like she worked enough to provide for all 3 of them since Nagisa didn’t work. I think this means that she shouldn’t be getting custody but they’re so cruel toward her :(

Nooo Nagisa dumbass, don’t be unselfish nowwww (unless it’s a really good plan. I don’t actually know what a settlement is lol). I mean it’s true what he’s saying but the conclusion doesn’t have to be that he gives up custody?! 

Okay actually you know what... maybe Nagisa apologizing and acknowledging Rena’s sacrifices and proposing a settlement is beautiful actually

The fucking achy feeling of this movie is actually so aslkdfj Like Sora’s cute ass voice in this angsty ass conversation, followed by Nagisa just breaking down in Shun’s arms T.T

1h52 - 1 month later

I’m glad we get to see how hard doing everything is for Rena but at least Sora and her get a few smiles (and also I think Rena got advice from Nagisa in that call?)

omg T.T All 4 of them on an outing together, a little bit of Sora’s dream. + Rena sharing that she can’t ride a bike (a secret from Nagisa and Sora) to Shun is sooooo T.T

I don’t know what to feel now except like... empty? I T.T That was really good. I wish we got to see another scene or two of Nagisa and Shun living by themselves without Sora though and how her absence has affected them (Nagisa especially) and how they’ve dealt with it.

It also kinda didn’t feel like a sequel to the first one lol there were like of the barest hints but it all still makes sense without having watched the series.

Anyway, just... really good, really achy.

Like the slice of life aspect (in a different slice-of-life way than the first series) and just how slow it felt, the child (Sora was so freaking cute), the twinge of heartache in every scene. Just like the series, it also just had so many other things that aren’t just Nagisa and Shun together. 

This reminded me a bit of History 2: Right or Wrong with the child being a main character and there’s a wife he’s not with thing but this one dealt with divorce and custody. It’s also like the aftermath of Life: Love on the Line breakup and so it deals with it better since the whole movie focuses on just that. 

Rating: 7/10 (I’m still going between 6.5 vs 7 but honestly like why not 7? why not?)

Rating: 8/10 [Aug 20, 2022 Update: Increased by 0.5 stars when rerating my top BLs] [Oct 29, 2022 Update: Increased by 0.5 stars when rerating my top BLs]

Tiktoks: 

2019 series Nagisa and Shun

2020 first waking up scene -> 2019 sleeping on the floor

2019 and 2020 parallels and scenes

2019, 2022 parallels

Shun Alone Again edit

Nagisa and Shun - Mitski Once More To See You

Rena: He needed more than me

I destroy myself just for you

[violetsoju]

HI LIN MY LOVE I (JIN) HAVE BEEN SUMMONED!! thank you so much for being my secret santa (and for participating omg) and even though i knew, i still felt my heart skip a lil beat when i saw you post the fic AHHHH ok here is my [shortened] reaction below:

first of all I'M SO EXCITED THAT IT'S AN ATSUMU FIC... i don't think i talk ab him very often SO THIS IS MY FIRST TIME READING AN ATSUMU FIC THAT WAS WRITTEN FOR ME OMFG THANK YOU T_T (just pretend these are tags so i don't have to add transition words between thoughts LOOL)

#I LOVE THAT PLANNING THE FIRST DATE WAS A COLLABORATIVE MSBY EFFORT... THAT EVEN SAKUSA TOOK PART IN I'M SO HONORED #NOT BOKUTO BOWING AND CALLING U "MY LADY" AND SAYING TO JUST GRAB THE FINGERS PLEASEEEE IM ALREADY LAUGHING THIS IS SO SILLY #atsumu clasping his hands behind his back like an old man 😭 baby no 😭 at least he's self aware #SOMEONE SHRED ATSUMU INTO GARBAGE MIYA INSTEAD PLEASE I'M HOWLINGGGG I FEEL SO BAD FOR HIM

#it's really the way atsumu has to take a jab at other people even in his THOUGHTS about SMILING alkjcdc #NOT THE BLACK STAINS LIN I LITERALLY JUST SLAPPED MY HAND OVER MY MOUTH OH MY GOOODDDDD NOOOOO I'M CRINGING FOR HIM OH MY GKLAJSDNKALSJDC #HE'S SOOOO CHEESY I'M GONNA CRYYYY I'M GONNA CRY PLEASE #he's so sweet :(( i'm :(((((((( he even said to text him when you get home :((((( AUUUGGGHHH #MY GODDDD THE FOLLOW UP TEXTS AT THE END ARE SOOOO CUTE I'M ALCJACS I LITERALLY "AWWWWWEEEEE"D OUT LOUD I'M SOOO T_T T_T T_T

anyway thank you so much for the fic lin dearest i feel so warm and happy inside :( this was so refreshing to read and i'm so thankful for you!!!! i hope you had a lovely holiday and didn't have to experience black squid-ink teeth in your face<3 (but if it's atsumu's maybe it's ok... maybe)

jin my love!! pls tysm for hosting this wholesome event ♡ it was such fun to write this heheh. and the first atsumu fic written for you omg im honoured T.T

the tags ahdjsksk I LOVE THEM SM im laughing so hard at them T.T and im so so glad you picked up on bokuto's silly yet sweet actions and also the reference to ushi and kags <333 atsumu is really such a lovable character isn't he (in by lovable in clowning and making him suffer HAHA) im so so glad that this chaotic dork made you all warm and happy inside :3 and yes,,, black squid-ink teeth only with atsumu,,, or kuroo,,,,

[bbreactions]

Big Bang's Reactions to their wife being moody when she's pregnant

A/N:

Hello~

How are you doing in school/jobs? I hope you are okay and enjoying life ^^ I am currently obsessed with reading all the books I own so that might also be a reason why I haven’t posted in so long but I like this reaction very much and I hope so will you~

I have to sing tomorrow in front of all the class for a mark and I am so nervous. Please wish me luck bc I am dying from nervousness T.T

I love you~~ <3 <3 

[GIFs not mine]

T.O.P

You were in the living room sitting on the sofa confused about your feelings towards the turned off TV  Everything was very emotional since you were pregnant and your back hurt a lot so you tried to lay and sit a lot but you figured it wasn't the best solution. You were already in the 8th month and sometimes the pain was unbelievable. In this 8 months, you scared Seunghyun at least thrice a day. You knew he was on some meeting with his friends in  Incheon. You felt sick and called him.

"I-I... feel sick Tabi-"

"WHAT? CAN YOU WAIT UNTIL I GET HOME?!"

"I just feel sick...."

After that call, he rushed back home to find you half asleep on the bathroom floor where it was warm. You almost gave him a heart attack every time you called him but he was always ready to come home and comfort you. He realized that it is really hard to carry a child and he wanted to give you everything you wanted. If you wanted to buy two new dresses for the baby, he bought it and if you felt bloated, he told you how beautiful and cute you look with a belly of your future child. He always tried to be careful with his words but sometimes he slipped out and made you angry. It happened a lot when you were arguing about all the arts in the house. 

G-Dragon

It was a weekend and Jiyong had to fly to Japan for some emergency business with his clothing line. You were left alone in a big house which was still in process of decorating. You felt horrible alone and you kept sending him messages how awful you feel and how bored you are. The first few months were a real nightmare for you with all the morning sickness but now the baby could kick and sometimes really hard. You couldn't keep your emotions in and just cried whenever you felt like it. 

'I hate this world'

'OMG the baby just kicked'

'I feel so ugly'

Once he read the texts on his way to the hotel he called you and wanted you to describe exactly how it felt when the baby kicked and he was used to you crying now so he wasn't surprised when you started tearing up at the beginning of the first sentence. He smiled when he heard your voice and was happy you will have a baby even if that means to hear you complain, cry, eat, every day. He couldn't wait to come back home and feel your tummy to say hello to him.

Taeyang

Taeyang had a schedule on a popular variety show and he was very nervous because the plan was to take you with him to at least watch the show. Before you finally agreed to and watch him you felt sick and couldn't made up your mind if you should go with him or not. It was very uncomfortable for you to go but you still went and supported him. Through the show you had to go out and get some air and even cried because you thought he is doing such a great job. Just as you came back the MCs wanted to talk to you too and you came to sit next to Taeyang. Once you got home from the awesome show you started crying and laughing because you were happy that you could be on the show and sad that you won't be able to go back soon.

"But I like them! I want to go there with Daesung next time... Can I? I can't-" "Honey... You are not assistant for kpop idols. It was very beautiful what you said there tho..."

"ARE YOU SAYING I WON'T BE ON TV ANYMORE???"

He was really shocked sometimes when you went from sad to happy and then mad or angry again for some unknown reason to him. He thought it was adorable how needy were you sometimes for his help but he respected you for carrying your baby. He knew there will be a lot of situations he couldn't save just like that but when you felt down or you needed him he made sure he was there and cheered you up. He didn't go out so much anymore because you felt more comfortable at home and he loved being present every moment with you.

Daesung

You were on your way downstairs when you figured you have no idea if you were actually hungry. Sometimes you were so confused what you want that nobody knew how to help you with that. Daesung had to save most of this kind of situations and he tried really hard to massage you when your back hurt. So, here you were sitting on the stairs for half an hour before Daesung came down from the bedroom where he was reading a book. He was very confused about your answers most of the time and so were you.

"What are you sitting on the stairs for? It's cold sitting here."

"I'm waiting for food."

"What food? Did you order a pizza or something? Did you check in the fridge, I think there's pasta from today's lunch..."

"No."

Your answers were cold and he didn't really know why. He kept on asking you questions and when he realized it's one of the times that you are mad for no reason he kept on saying funny things and made funny faces to make you laugh. He didn't stop until you smiled and asked him to carry you downstairs because you were too tired. He agreed on carrying you if you would let him choose the name for the baby if it will be a girl. Since you knew it will be a boy, you accepted the deal.

Seungri

Seungri was thrilled to see you every day and see the baby growing inside of you which sounded a bit weird but he was just obsessed with the baby. The most of the time when he wasn't worried about his work, he called you and came to pick you up at work if you were still there. He wanted to buy a lot of things for the baby and was nervous to know if it's a boy or a girl. In the evening he caressed your tummy and sang songs to you and him/her. You felt annoyed and cold so you pushed his hand away and told him to leave you alone.

"Stop it. It's annoying."

"W-w-hat?? My LOVE is ANNOYING???"

"YES IT IS." then you angry went to the bedroom to cry because you yelled at him.

He was very offended but he knew you must have been uncomfortable or something that wasn't right which he expected and he knew it would be foolish to react like a child and make you even angrier. In these situations he first tried to cheer you up with food and if that didn't work, he did everything you told him to unless leave you alone until you fell asleep but since that was difficult the last couple months he was more tired then you and often fell asleep while caressing your tummy.

[aja154ever]

Bungou Stray Dogs Ideal OVA Spoilers

So first, my Japanese isn’t quite good enough for an anime/manga series like BSD because we know that this requires a higher level of Japanese. So I reread the manga translation by beloved @dazaiscans after watching to fully understand.

So the whole OVA basically goes after manga chapter 40 with a few minor differences. And that’s what I’ll only be pointing out here. If you prefer the whole story, you can just read the manga itself since it’s the same. 

Some have also been asking if it’s already uploaded somewhere, I’m not sure about that but I heard that it might get posted this weekend. The one I have is what I bought as I happen to be in Japan currently.

So you may want to wait for the video itself or if you don’t mind, spoilers are under the cut!

Surprisingly (I just noticed this now), Atsushi wasn’t actually in the manga so being the MC, Bones must’ve realized that he has to be in the OVA. So some of Dazai and Tanizaki scenes/lines were given to Atsushi.

“Keikaku doori da” - Kunikida actually uttered this famous line XD

Idk how that happened but Kunikida’s ringtone when Dazai called was Dazai’s voice which sounded like he’s getting strangled, asking him to answer the phone.

Aya has a Kansai accent (I didn’t know I haven’t read the raw manga) so that made it more difficult to understand the language

Kunikida initially called Aya, “Chibi” which ticked her off.

When Aya played that she was “harassed” by Kunikida, the people around them heard and as a result poor Kunikida earned bad words such as “hentai”

Chuuya’s first appearance: He’s sitting somewhere in the station and hears the explosion from Kunikida’s stun grenade. He says one word, “Nanda?” (What was that?)

Flashback scene: Rokuzou and Sasaki’s death, when Kunikida said that despite his struggles, people still die.

When Kunikida apologizes to Aya for not detonating the bomb on her, she replies, “I’m a warrior of justice.” Kunikida hugs her and says, “I won’t let you die alone.” (Ok this was so dramatically romantic lol like you’d want to cry like Aya then fall in love with Kunikida-kun)

Yosano throws Kunikida’s glasses back to him and he wears it then.

Chuuya’s scene after Katsura gets caught by the police: He appears upside down somewhere underground while reporting to Mori about the incident. “No, it’s nothing, Boss. Looks like it’s just some folly of someone who has a grudge against the agency.” When he ends the call, he continued to walk on the ceiling while saying, “I would’ve attacked even if it’s just Dazai’s stupidity. Tsk. I even looked forward to it. Well, in that situation nothing can be done.”

Aya punches Kunikida after getting rejected by him, which breaks his glasses.

OMG I didn’t understand most of what Fukuzawa and Taneda were talking about but basically it was about the agency’s future if something happens to the Director.

Then that segues to Dazai claiming that there is no other one who can be the next director but Kunikida.

And Kunikida wears his broken glasses as he walks into the light. <3

Other points and thoughts:

Trash Candy and Namae wo Yobu yo were used as OP and ED, respectively.

Kunikida’s sparkling smile is a treasure. Only Carlyle has made it happen. He’s such a fanboy i feel you so much

YOSANO IS QUEEN

This is my bias but I just want to praise my favorite voice actors’ acting: Kunikida’s Hosoya Yoshimasa, Dazai’s Miyano Mamoru. I just missed them voicing my beloved characters AAAAAHHHHH (I want to praise Chuuya’s Taniyama Kishou but he only had two scenes lol)

And sorry I’m such a trash I can talk about Soukoku for weeks from Chuuya’s 21-second appearance where he still managed to mention that Dazai bastard. And yes, let’s talk about how beautiful they are. T.T

But yeah, let us remember that this is Kunikida’s OVA and ofc I love this precious baby/dad

Screenshots here, here, and here.

[aomgdoughnut]

Pregnancy Test

Artist : Jay Park

After leave it a few minutes, I come back again to check the result.

"Omg how can this happen?" How will he reacts when he sees this? Will he accept it? Two bold red stripped lines perfectly formed on this pregnancy test. 

"Baby, are you home?" I open the door and found no one. She texts me to come home early because she has something to tell. But our house completely dark and I don't think she's home yet.

This is the fourth year of our relationship. Time sure flies so fast. It still feel like yesterday when I first meet her, our first date, first kiss and first night. Now she's already become a part of me, my life. Many friends ask when we will get married but both of us never even discuss about that. We're happy now and as long as we loved each other, there's nothing to worry.

"Hiks…hiks…" i heard sobbing sound from our room.  I open the door slowly, afraid the ghost will showing up in front of my eyes. 

"Baby?" (Y/N) sit in the end of the bed while crying hard hiding her face. She turns her face at me when I'm calling her but quickly hide her face again with her tiny palms.

"Baby what's wrong?" i don't know what happened but (Y/N) rarely cries for something minor. There must be something happened to her. As caring boyfriend, I try to calm her first without asking anything. I soothe her until she calm down.

“Jaebuuuuumm… whoaaaa…” She keeps crying while hug me tight. She doesn’t even allow me to wipe her tears.

“Yes baby. What’s wrong?” I patted her head lightly still try to calm her. She reaches something on the coffee table beside the bed and handed it to me. She gives me a little stick with two red strip on it.

“What is it baby? Pregnancy test?” She nodded her head slowly.

“Then what is this mean? This two red lines?”

“It… It means positive… I’m sorry…” She hangs her head low holding her tears. Okay, now I’m the one who confused. So (Y/N) is crying like this because she’s pregnant with my baby? Is she not happy with that? Am I happy? Can I take a responsibility as a dad of my child? This information is too much for me to take.

“Okay (Y/N), wait a minute. Give me some time to think about this okay? I’m sorry. Just give me a minute.”

 He let me go and close the door behind him. Am I too much? He doesn’t seem hate it but he doesn’t seem happy either. How should I wrap this up? He really believes this.

One hour ago.

Working is really tiring, especially today. How can I get trolled by my co-worker more than three times a day? I know today is April fool but they still successfully fooling me. Their expression when fooling me is really annoying. They seem extremely happy. Should I prank Jay too?

That’s when my wildest idea coming up. I bought pregnancy test and a red marker to fool him. It’s quite simple. I just have to make two strip line and acting in front of him.  I text him to come home early and he agrees.

10 minutes passed and Jay not coming back to bedroom yet. Is he leaving? It’s already pass 12 so the April fool prank should be ended. I give up and about to looking for him and apologize when the door opens. There’s Jay with his smile coming to me and held my hands.

“Baby, I’m sorry earlier.” He said and kisses my palms.

“No, I’m the one who’s sorry-“

“Sst… you don’t have to be sorry. I’ve think about this. I think the time has come. We should get married and raise our child together.” He hugs me tight after finish his words. I try to release from his hugs and want to explain everything.

“But Jay, the truth is-“

“I know baby. I’ve call mom and she sounds happy to hear that. She’ll take care of everything and you don’t have to worry about that.” He smiles from ear to ear. What should I do now? It became more complicated.

“Jay-“ Suddenly his phone ringing.

“Wait baby, it Simon hyung.” He takes the call and change it to speaker phone.

“Yes hyung?”

“WOW JAY REALLY?? I’M SO HAPPY TO HEAR THAT!!!” Loud scream from another line welcoming us.

“Hahaha yeah hyung. She just told me.” Wait. He already told his crew about this?! I snatch the phone from him and ended the call.

“How many people that you’ve tell within 10 minutes Jay??” I raise my voice without knowing.

“What? Why? Are you not happy?” He asks me with worry face. Okay now blame me to play this stupid prank on him.

“Jay, now listen to me. Today is the first day of April.”

“Yeah I know babe.” He still doesn’t get it.

“Have you ever heard about April fool?”

“April Fool?”

“Yeah, April fool.” His confused expression now changes into shock.

“Babe, please don’t tell me…”

“Yeah… Sorry.”

“But Baby, I’ve told Mom, Dad, PJ, Oscar and the crew that you’re pregnant and we’ll get married soon!”

“But you haven’t told Jehan?”

“Oh Jehan, yeah I kinda forget about him. But it’s not the problem now!!!”

“Just tell them you got pranked by me.” I pat his arm lightly and try to end this conversation when he yanks my arm to gain my attention back.

“No! They’ll tease me like a fool!”

“Then what would you do? I’m not pregnant Park Jaebum.” I release from his grip and ready to sleep but he yanks my arm again.

“Then let’s make it real.” He has serious expression now.

“What?!” He picks me up and throws me to the bed.

PS. I’m posting this late T.T sorry.

[supaliaxpress]

Goblin in Review: The Kisses

As specially requested by @mynameishassie​ Here’s a review/reaction of all the kisses between Shin and Eun-Tak in Goblin. Just to play around cause I have nothing better to do.

Gif Credit | Rating: Innocence = 10/10, Dirty = 0/10, Satisfaction = 4/10

Ahh... good ol’ memories. The very first kiss between Shin and Eun-Tak in episode 6... a kiss so pure, innocent, and naive that all the snowflakes started floating upwards. What is gravity? Apparently it doesn’t work in the presence of these two sweethearts. So what makes this kiss important being their first kiss? Well this kiss set the stage for Shin to start thinking about life instead of dying. This kiss was initiated by Eun-Tak not because she necessarily loved him at the time, but because she didn’t know the consequences of Shin’s sword and what love really encompasses. This kiss compared to their last kiss is totally different in terms of romance and their mutual feelings. Shin was still only learning what it meant to be in love and Eun-Tak was still only desiring love. This is seen in their body language as Eun-Tak was struggling to stay on her tiptoes to hesitantly peck him and Shin’s shoulders were completely slumped forwards in utter dumbstruck. A perfect way to get our silly couple rolling. Despite this kiss being not hot and sexy, I appreciate this kiss as I love Shin’s reaction to Eun-Tak kissing him... to think this supposedly “weak” and “defenseless” girl can easily make this 939 yo Goblin confused and break down his defenses. But I desperately needed more than this kiss.

Gif Credit | Rating: Sweetness = 10/10, Hotness = 2/10, Satisfaction = 7/10

Now this was a proper “first kiss” of them being an official couple; what better way than for Shin to redeem himself by initiating the kiss while Eun-Tak asked for it in episode 10. The setting was perfect for our silly couple: fun date in a tent while drinking soju, a kick-ass entertaining performance, and a sweet and happy kiss shared between the two. This kiss was literally the definition of happiness as their kiss even has it’s own Sun shining a random light of unknown origin. It was quite hot of Shin to grab her face so gently as he kissed her and then Eun-Tak stole another kiss right afterwards. This made me love Eun-Tak more as she’s not afraid to ask for kisses... I understand why, lol. Just look at who her boyfriend is. I do like this kiss a lot, as said by Eun-Tak herself, “It’s perfect.” It was the perfect kiss to show how they mutually love each other after coming to an agreement that they will both fight to be together as compared to episode 4′s kiss. I wasn’t expecting anything hotter or sexier since our couple finally got together after jumping the hurdle of Eun-Tak finding out the truth behind Shin’s sword. But still, I needed more! lmao

Gif Credit | Rating: Cuteness = 10/10, Crime = 0/10, Satisfaction = 6/10

The cute photo booth kiss. That’s all that really needs to be said about this kiss, lol. It was a cute and off-guard peck that Eun-Tak gave to Shin which left him flustered and giggling like a little girl. >.< The funny thing is that Eun-Tak had pure intentions while it left Shin thinking about (most likely) not so pure thoughts ... this girl can literally kill Shin on the spot whether she removes his sword or not, lmao. I just can’t get over how Shin caught himself using “tiny” and “small” in the same sentence! And then he proceeded to say he wants to come here every day, lmfao. This entire scene in episode 12 is adorable and especially how pure Eun-Tak’s intentions were to 1) get a picture with him and 2) give him an excuse to see his sister. Of course, it wasn’t enough to satisfy my fangirl desires and I was desperately hoping... praying... for a kiss that would exceed my expectations.

Gif Credit | Rating: Hotness = 10/10, Passion = 10/10, Satisfaction = 100/10 

Now we’re talking... this kiss swept me off my feet when Shin turned back to give her such a desperate, passionate, and engraving kiss before his imminent death. THIS WAS THE KISS WE WERE ALL WAITING FOR 13 EPISODES LATER!!! Just look at this beauty! Till this day... I love this kiss so damn much, it’s the kiss of the century. Just look at how Shin cupped her face as he kissed her with such a passion knowing that he might disappear forever. Look at Eun-Tak unable to say or do anything as she just closed her eyes in compliance... worried why he would suddenly kiss her like that. It was the perfect hot and passionate kiss to show how our couple loves each other and wants to be together. THEIR CHEMISTRY WAS OFF THE CHARTS! OMO! The only that that disappointed me about this kiss was how they DIDN’T FULLY CLOSE-UP FILM IT! Like why you gonna film a friggin hot kiss but not show us the whole thing close up??? Ugh... That was the good stuff there. >.> Despite my love for this kiss, I was praying that an even better kiss would happen once she was 29 yo. 

Gif Credit | Rating: Feels = 10/10, Longing = 10/10, Satisfaction = 10/10

This kiss was sooo good... a slightly melancholic kiss that was filled with feels as Shin immediately embraced a frantic Eun-Tak into a kiss as she finally remembered him. All I can say is that this kiss was so good from the angle it was filmed, from how it focused on Shin’s hand tightening on her, and to how both Eun-Tak and Shin’s eyes were filled with so much pain, sadness, and longing for each other. I started ballin like a baby cause they needed to be in each other’s arms and I was so happy when she finally remembered him! Ugh... To think this all happened in episode 15... T.T But this wasn’t the kiss I was waiting for... there was something else I needed to see from the episode 14 preview. 

Gif Credit | Rating: Lovey Dovey = 10/10, Rainbows & Unicorns = 10/10, Satisfaction = 8/10

Just another really lovey dovey peck between the two... oh wait... two pecks cause Shin wanted another one, lmao. I just love their height difference... *incoherent giggling* BUT I’M STILL WAITING FOR THE BEST KISS DAMNIT! DON’T FAIL ME GONG YOO!!! 

Drumroll.... 

Gifs Credit | Rating : Sexiness = _(꒪ཀ꒪」∠)_, Dirty thoughts = ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡° ), Satisfaction = ∞ w/ too much salt

What more can I say about how much I am absolutely obsessed with this long over-due sexy make out between these two? Just look at how Shin launched at her... but at the same time Shin is such a gentleman as he stopped to make sure she was okay with it.. OF COURSE she would reply back enthusiastically! BUT I DIED WHEN SHE JUMPED AND WRAPPED HER LEGS AROUND HIM! OMG! AND FOR THE LOVE OF ALL MAKE OUTS, when Shin started planting kisses on her face and she was smiling from enjoying his touch... that was the sexiest thing I’ve ever seen!!! BUT DAMNIT! WHO THE FUCK CUTS IN THE MIDDLE OF GONG YOO AND KIM GO EUN’S KISSES??? WHY WOULD YOU DEPRIVE US OF THESE TWO WONDERFULLY AMAZING KISSERS??? WHY COULDN’T YOU SHOW US THE WHOLE DAMN THING??? (╯°益°)╯彡┻━┻

Seriously, the only issue I have with this kiss is that they abruptly cut the kiss at the GOOD part. They could have gradually transitioned out of the scene instead of just cutting in the middle of the kiss; they had plenty of time to add 30 more seconds -- oh for goodness sakes, I would’ve been glad to see another hour. PLUS, WHY WOULD YOU NOT SHOW SOMETHING YOU TEASED US IN THE FUCKIN PREVIEW??? Two lovers who defied time, God, death, and were finally together would NOT just simply call it a night after sharing a passionate kiss on the couch AFTER staying together overnight in fuckin luxurious hotel (with probably a huge ass bed)... just saying. ┻━┻ ︵ヽ(`Д´)ﾉ︵ ┻━┻

And that’s all folks... I can’t really say that I’m completely satisfied since I love Shintak so much... It makes me sad that Gong Yoo and Kim Go Eun will probably never costar together again since it’s rare for people to costar together a second time. WHAT A SHAME! YOU HAVE TWO AMAZING KISSERS COSTAR TOGETHER AND THAT’S IT? Like I would have been okay if they didn’t show any skin... just some more steamy moments between the two because their love is so fuckin tragic that they deserve some more lovey dovey couple scenes. Ugh... just because I’m a salty grandma, friggin 15 age rating ruined it! At least the kisses got better and better and we got a few Gong Yoo certified kisses in Goblin. T.T 

“The kiss itself is immortal. It travels from lip to lip, century to century, from age to age. Men and women garner these kisses, offer them to others and then die in turn.” ~ Guy de Maupassant, The Complete Short Stories of Guy de Maupassant, Part One