#omg tomorrow ill get up at 10

[80pairsofcrocs]

baby scarab || 67

A/N : its finally done- and its a small filler for whats about to come!!

masterlist - marvel masterlist - series masterlist

A/N : omg you guys have been so mf patient, but you are finally being fed!!! i enjoy writing again and im back in my moon knight summer so HERE YA GO!!!

please enjoy, and don't be shy if you want to be in the taglist, just ask <3, sorry for the long wait

pairings : steven grant x (platonic)reader, marc spector x (platonic) reader, khonshu x (platonic)reader, jake lockley x (platonic)reader, casper hart(OC) x reader

TW : medicine (pills), spidey stuff, mentions of violence, language, small smut scene minors dni, kiss and make up type shit idk, let me know if i missed anything

~~~

you were next to jake on the couch, frenchie on the other side of you as you sob your heart out into jakes chest.

you were just angry at the situation, and the more you thought about what casper said the more it affected you.

jake rubbed your back while glaring at his phone, debating on calling the poor kid and cussing him out.

frenchie was kind of out of place- he has kids, but none above the age of 10.

he just kind of sat on the other side of you offering silent support.

after you calmed yourself down, jake looked down at you and sighed. "i'm so sorry, mi vida"

"it's fine.. i know he didn't mean it" you sniff a few times before wiping your nose of your sleeve. "i just don't know what to do"

"i have an idea" frenchie speaks up, making both you and jake look at him. "..you can just talk to him you know? get to the bottom of why he acted out?" he offers and you nod slowly.

"i think that's my best option.. thank you frenchie" you say, and frenchie smiles.

jake nods at the man and looks back to you. "feeling a little better?" you nod at his question.

"yeah.. just.... really hungry all of a sudden"

"you should really get some fluids in you, you cried too much" steven pipes up and you sigh.

"can i have some pop tarts and juice?" you ask and jake nods, so you get up to move to the kitchen.

after you leave the room, jake grabs his phone and hits casper's contact, waiting for him to pick up.

frenchie gives him a disapproving look as casper answers.

"hello-"

"you better apologize to my daughter, i mean it. she came home crying because of you" jake says as calm as he can.

it's silent for a moment. "i- i know, sir i- i feel terrible. i'm bringing her flowers and more pop tarts tomorrow"

jake sighs. "good.. listen.. i...... i know you're a good kid. just let her- us help you okay?" casper nods even though jake can't see him.

"okay.. i'll explain everything to her i promise"

"good. she'll see you at school tomorrow then"

"thank you, sir"

"my name is jake and you know it"

"right- sorry"

jake lets out a singular laugh. "goodbye for now, hart"

"okay.. bye jake-"

jake hangs up before casper could get the rest of his words out, coincidentally as you walk back into the room with your snack and your juice.

you sit back down in between frenchie and your dad, opening your package of pop tarts.

"do i have to go to school tomorrow?" you ask and jake nods, making you groan.

"i don't want to though- i- ill clean the house just let me stay-"

"no."

you glare at jake and eat your pop tarts, taking sips of your juice every now and then.

it was an uneventful rest of the night. you were talking frenchies ear off, though he didn't mind.

you reminded him of his first daughter, unable to ever shut her mouth.

he means that in the nicest way possible.

the next morning was hell though.

you basically fought all your dads while trying to convince them that you're sick, or dying so that you could stay home.

you were sadly out the door on time.

you clenched your fists in your pockets as you walked on the sidewalk, until you heard rushed footsteps behind you.

you turn around to see casper, with a box of pop tarts and a bouquet of your favorite flowers.

you unclench your fists as he stops in front of you, just staring at you.

"i.. i'm so sorry y/n.." he starts and you rush forward to hug him.

"i know.. it's okay" you assure him.

"but it's not- i took my anger out on you and that wasn't fair.. i should've just told you what was going on-"

"hey.. it's okay. you are doing the right thing" you let go of him to look him in the eye.

"i never stopped loving you, not even for a second. i- i was just so- so mad" he says.

you nod and smile gently at him. "we can talk about that later okay..? at my place?"

"can we uh.. actually go to mine. i don't want to leave allison and mom alone for too long"

"of course. i just have to call my dads after school" you nod at him and he sighs.

"i got these for you.." he holds up the flowers and the pop tarts.

you smile and hug him again. "thank you. you didn't have to do that"

"i wanted to. it's only fair" he responds and you let go of him to take the flowers.

"they're beautiful" you smell the flowers, taking your free hand and holding his.

"not as beautiful as you-"

"okay, let's get going" you laugh, dragging him along towards the direction of your school.

"but i was just saying-"

you cut him off by laughing, which makes him glare at you before raising an eyebrow, deciding to leave it alone.

~~~

it was already after school, and you were waiting for casper right outside your school while dialing your dads number.

"what do you want?" marc asks as soon as he answers and you scoff.

"hello to you too, dad" you start. "i was wondering if i could-"

"yeah, go ahead just be home before 10"

"why are you encouraging it? what if i wanted to bone him, would you still be okay with it?"

marc sighs. "just be home before 10. i love you"

"i love you too" you laugh before hanging up.

you wait a couple more minutes and the last few people come out of the school, your brows furrowing when you don't see casper.

you do see your math teacher though, so you approach her.

"uh- mrs. harper?" you tap on her shoulder and she turns around.

her long blonde hair swings behind her as she turns around. "oh, y/n, shouldn't you be heading home?"

"yes, but casper- did you see him in there? i've been waiting for him out here and he's not usually this late" you explain and she frowns.

"no, i'm sorry y/n. i haven't seen him, i would check inside, he could be talking to another teacher" she offers and you nod.

"thank you" you say and you rush inside as the teacher smiles to herself, seeing that chivalry wasn't completely dead.

you rush through the hallways, checking all the open classrooms, but not finding him.

that's when you hear a 'thud' come from the nearby boys bathroom.

you walk over and press your ear to the door, hearing muffled voices. you crack the door open, but don't look inside.

"casper..? is that you?" you ask into the air and you hear another voice.

"say anything, and you're dead" you recognized that voice. it was that ferret boy, and there was no doubt he was giving casper a hard time.

you roll your eyes and enter the boys bathroom, seeing that casper was on the floor, leaning against the wall while holding his arm.

and the ferret boy, he was standing a few feet away from where casper was, both looking over at you in shock.

"come on, this is pathetic" you say. "why can't you just leave him alone- he didn't do anything to you" you move to help casper up when the blonde blocks your path.

"well, now that i have both you freaks here, i think it'll save me some time" he cracks his knuckles and you narrow your eyes at him.

before he could do anything, you trip him over and pin him to the ground, keeping a knee on his back to keep him down.

it all went by so fast, and the blonde lets out a shaky breath. "wh-what the fuck is wrong with you?!" he yells.

you roll your eyes again and get off of him, helping casper up and rolling his sleeve up to see a large bruise on his arm.

the blonde gets up and brushes himself off. "you'll pay for that.." he rushes over again, and you push casper out of the way so you could stop the blonde from hurting him.

you catch his fist in your hand and twist it, causing him to wince.

you let go and back up a step, as if challenging him to do it again.

he just pants and reaches his arms out, and without thinking, you shoot a web out to stick his arms to the wall.

everything goes silent.

"shit.." casper whispers, grabbing onto your sleeve.

"you- you're her! you're arachnid!-" the blonde yells and you shush him.

"oh my god- no- this can't be happening-" you put your hands on your knees, hyperventilating.

casper puts a hand on your back. "please- jones-"

"..how do you know my actual name? i know you call me 'ferret' behind my back" he argues.

you scoff. "we've been going to school together since middle school-"

"and then you disappeared and became weird" he interrupts.

casper steps in front of you, glaring at jones. "she's not weird, it's just a mental illness- and it's not even an illness-"

"casper it's fine- just- jones please- you can't tell anyone.." you plead, feeling ultimately stupid for letting yourself slip up like that.

jones just scoffs. "i've just discovered your deepest darkest secret. you think ill just keep it to myself?" he asks sarcastically, trying to get him arm feee from the wall behind him.

you stare at casper uncomfortably, unsure of what to do.

"dude, this could get her arrested!" casper tries and jones just rolls his eyes.

"so?"

"so i wouldn't be able to help people anymore.. and my parents would be alone" you answer coldly.

"we have moon guy for that" jones replies and you shake your head.

"not to be self centered, but without me, 'moon guy' would go underground again" you respond and jones sighs.

"...i'll keep your secret. but it will cost you" he says and you roll your eyes.

"fine"

"i get inside information on your little rendezvous', and i want to know the whole deal with your 'dads'" he says and you tilt your head.

he wants to know about you? strange. but it's negotiable.

"alright.. deal-"

"uh, no." casper interrupts. "you are not-"

you take casper's arm and lead him a bit away from where jones was still stuck to the wall.

"casper i'm in no position to not take that deal.. you understand i've- i've killed people, right?" you say in a hushed voice and he sighs.

"i just don't want him taking advantage of you.." he admits and you take his hands in yours, squeezing them reassuringly.

"i know, cas. listen, i love you, but i have it handled" you give him a nervous smile and he sighs again.

"if you're sure.. and i love you too" he smiles back and you nod before turning back to jones.

you take the webs off of jones arm. "we have to leave.. there's a back entrance right outside, we can't let a teacher see us.." you lead the way, sneaking out of the bathroom, the two boys following you.

once outside, jones speaks up. "so.. do the webs come out of anywhere else?"

casper chokes on air. "dude-!"

you sigh. "no. every single person that knows has asked me that, and the answer is always a hard no" you answer.

"did you grow extra limbs?" jones asks, a bit out of character.

"interesting question, but no" you look to him for a split second, then you turn to casper who was on the other side of you, looking all jealous that another man was talking to you.

boo hoo, ghost.

you just silently held his hand while the three of you walked up to this gorgeous mansion.

"this is my home- i'll see you guys tomorrow!" jones uncharacteristically smiles and rushes inside his house.

you blink a few times and turn to casper "that was so weird.."

"yeah" he responds shortly and the two of you begin your walk to his house in a sort of tense silence.

~~~

you arrive at casper's house, and once you both go in grace looks to the door, visibly relieved to not see her husband.

casper goes over to grace, hugging her before you approach the two of them.

"grace.. i know it's not my place but we can help you.." you start and she smiles gently at you.

"i think i'm ready, as well as my children.. we will accept anything from you and your family" she says and you nod, also relieved.

"whatever you need, we can give you" you say to her, and she tears up a bit.

she smiles and rushes over to hug you tightly. "god bless you, y/n.." she whispers as you hug her back.

"i uhm- im going to take allison to the park.. we- we'll be back in an hour" she suddenly pulls away, going to allison's room.

"allison has been stressed lately, the park calms her down" casper explains to you, grabbing your hand and squeezing it.

grace comes back out with allison and her eyes light up when she sees you, rushing over to hug your legs before waving quickly and running out the door, leaving grace to also wave and catch up to allison.

"well i hope they have fun.." you sigh, taking off your shoes as casper does the same

"so... what should we do now?" casper asks as the two of you stare at each other awkwardly.

"maybe start packing essentials..?" you offer and he nods, both of you going to his room.

~~~

"come on- just stick your hand back there it's fine!"

"no! i don't want my hand to be icky-"

"it's not that bad"

"then you do it-"

"but i can't reach"

you and casper had been arguing about who was going to reach behind his dresser to unplug his lamp, the dresser in which was bolted into the floor as it came with the house.

"...you're openly admitting your arms are shorter than mine?" you ask, smirking as you hold your arm out, and taking casper's to compare arm length.

he scoffs and yank his arm away, rolling his eyes.

"do you think i'll need to pack my pillows and stuff?" he asks and you hum.

"i've seen the place before, you'll be all set.. but i would still bring it. it'll be your new home after all" you tell him carefully, in a gentle tone.

he looks to you, taking your hands in his. "y/n.. i'm scared" he confesses, his voice shaking.

your brows furrow as you two step closer, so that you could cradle his face in your hands.

"i know.. but you're so strong, cas. i know this is the only home you've ever known but.. i really think you and your family will benefit. just think about your mother- your absolute gem of a mom- she will have the freedom she deserves- we already have job interviews set up for her.. does she like libraries? or uh- coffee shops because i-"

casper puts a finger to your lips to pause your speaking.

"y/n i love you. so so much- you don't have to do this for us-"

"i want to, casper.. we want to" you assure him, smiling gently.

he smiles as well, visibly relaxing.

"now quit moping around, i want to see what you have hidden in the back of your closet" you let go of him to stumble through piles of utter junk while he protests.

"y/n, baby, sweetheart, please don't-"

you pick up an old record player, sitting in the corner of a shelf. "what's this..? you have records?" you ask, genuinely curious.

"a few..." he scratches the back of his head, helping you out of the closet and putting the record player on his empty nightstand.

he opens his top dresser drawer and pulls out a frank sinatra record, the album being 'nice n easy'.

"awww cute" you hug casper from behind as he carefully puts the record onto the record player, adjusting the needle as music starts playing quietly.

you recognized it as 'fools rush in', and that's when you start swaying along with the music, still having your arms wrapped around casper.

he chuckles airily and turns around in your arms, grabbing your wrists gently and putting one over his shoulder and holding the other.

"you're so sappy, love" you rest your cheek on casper's chest as you both slowly dance around his almost empty room.

"you're the one who started this, dear" he responds, and you purposely and proudly step on his foot, making him pinch your side.

after the small interaction, you go through quite a few songs, just enjoying swaying along with the music and being in each others presence.

you bring your head up to rest your forehead against casper's, closing your eyes.

casper leans forward, capturing his lips with yours, slowing the dancing even further as he moves his hands to your waist, and you move yours thrown sloppily around his neck to keep him close.

you feel bold and slide your tongue against casper's bottom lip, making him open his mouth slightly for you to lick up into his mouth.

it gets steamy pretty quickly, and before you know it, your shirt is halfway across the room, and your straddling casper's lap on his still made bed kissing and sucking at his neck.

casper lets his eyes close as he breathes out slowly and shakily, running his hands up and down your sides, fingers nearing your bra clip.

you tug at his shirt as he unclips your bra, both of you sitting up to take said items off, casper's hands finding your breasts, kneading them as he pinches your nipples between his thumb and forefinger.

you let out a breathy moan as he does so, lightly tracing casper's bare chest with your fingers, circling around the scars on his abdomen.

he notices your stare at the healed wound, taking your hand in his and looking up at you.

"hey.. we don't have to do this right now-" he starts but you cut him off by delivering a quick kiss to his lips.

"i want to- sorry i.. i got distracted for a second.." you apologize, cleaning your head. "i really, really want to do this-"

casper chuckles at your eagerness, flipping the two of you over so that your back is flat on the bed, casper already untying the band on his sweatpants.

you do the same with yours, and it leaves you both nearly bare to each other, only being covered by your lower undergarments.

casper takes the band on your panties gently with his fingers, slowly pulling them down along your legs.

you're both looking into each others eyes when me leans down to kiss you, instantly moaning and letting his tongue explore your mouth.

casper brings a hand down to your sex, circling your clit with his thumb while gently pushing his middle and forefinger through your wet folds, making you let out a shaky breath before moaning into casper's mouth.

you feel his hard on press into your thing, making you break the kiss. "wait- do you have a condom here?" you ask, and casper reaches into one of his packed bags right by the bed.

"of course i do, we're too broke to be teen parents"

you laugh before focusing more on the moment as casper rips the condoms package open before throwing it to the floor, sliding the condom onto his hardening cock.

unbeknownst to you, casper bit his tongue to prevent himself from finishing just by you touching him. 

you just blink down at him, smiling as he gently flips you both over, now having your back on the bed while casper hovers over you. he smiles back, positioning himself over you so that the tip of his cock was lined up with your entrance.

taking in a deep breath and holding it, casper cradles your face while starting to push into you. "breathe, y/n.." he reminds you.  

you feel your eyes roll back into your head as casper sinks fully into you, and you let out a lengthy moan while your arms wrap around his neck, nails digging into his shoulders. you both stay still while casper reminds you to breathe again, and you nod when you're ready for him to move.

casper slowly starts thrusting himself in and out of you, and if you were in a different headspace the noises of it would have bothered you. your nails dig almost impossibly deeper into caspers shoulders, and he leans down to start kissing your neck.

you lean your head further back, letting casper suck hickeys on every inch of you he could reach. your legs tighten around his waist as his thrusts get deeper and slower, hitting your sweet spot perfectly every time.

"cas- i.. i'm close-" you whine, leaning forward to hide your face in caspers neck, biting down on his shoulder as his breathe hits your ear.

casper lets out a lengthy moan into your ear, his thrusts becoming more erratic before he brings a hand down to start circling your clit again. you bite down harder on caspers shoulder as you moan, legs starting to shake violently before you feel yourself release.

your eyes close as you move your head away from caspers shoulder, laying it down on the pillow below you as you catch your breath.

casper finishes a few seconds after, almost collapsing on top of you while he softens inside of you. he brushes a few damp strands of hair from your face, planting a kiss on your cheek as he slowly moves off of you. a whine bubbles up from your throat at the feeling of him leaving you.

"come on, hon, let's get you cleaned up. i think there's still some towels in the bathroom" he tells you, lifting you to sit up and wrapping your shoulders in the blanket that was folded on his bed. he helps you stand and he wraps the blanket tighter around you as he leads you to the bathroom.

"thank you cas, i love you"

"i love you too, y/n/n"

~~~

you and casper had showered together, cleaning each other of any proof that you had done coitus. everything had been cleaned, and certain things had been thrown away as well.

you were now helping casper, grace, and allison unpack their things into their new house while jake and layla went to get the last of their belongings.

"how do you like your new room?" you ask allison, putting up the last poster for her. she smiles up at you before hugging your legs. you grin from ear to ear as you pat the top of her head. grace peaks into the room, eyes softening at the sight, her tense shoulders sinking into their more relaxed form.

"ms ha- grace- will you guys be alright here?" you ask and she instantly nods. "i've never felt safer.." she says with a smile.

you nod and allison lets go of you, letting you go to the front door ro get your shoes on. casper meets you there, handing you your jacket.

"i'll see you at school, cas" you say, putting your jacket on.

"of course, my love" he wraps his arms around your waist.

you snort and scrunch your nose a bit. "you're getting more corny by the second" you say out loud, wrapping your arms around his neck.

casper rests his forehead against yours. "anything for you, my darling honeybun-" 

"get off me"

"no- y/n- baby i'm sorry-"

"no, we are breaking up"

"..."

you press a small kiss to caspers cheek before opening their front door.

"i love you, see you tomorrow" you laugh, turning to leave.

casper laughs as well. "yeah, i love you too. dork" he mumbles to himself, knowing you could hear him.

you simply smile and begin your short journey home.

~~~

you unlock your door and go inside, expecting to see one of your dads and layla since they finishes helping with caspers family and their stuff a bit ago. yet, you didn't see or sense anyone.

and frenchie was gone as well..

odd.

that's when you felt it... the tingle, but it was sharper than usual.

and that's when khonshu and taweret appeared right in the middle of your living room.

~~~

A/N : cliffhanger. sorry not sorry. i truly love each and every one of you :)

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[lizzieislife94x]

Personal Trainer (e.o)

Lizzie needed a new personal trainer for endgame and you got the job

Lizzie x G!P reader

If you have a request drop me a message I do them right away 😇

Y/ns POV:

"Thats us done for today ladies you all done amazing ill see you next week" I say wiping my face as I finish teaching a group work out I need to take a breather my next client is due any minute I've been working with her for 2 months the one and only Elizabeth Olsen I couldn't believe when I got the job she's hilarious and always so nice and down to earth I'm snapped out of my thoughts as she walks over "good evening y/n" she says with a giggle

"ah miss Olsen good evening can you give me 2 minutes I need to run to the bathroom but I'll be back in no time" I laugh as she slaps my shoulder "omg gross y/n go hurry" she giggles as I go do a quick pee once I'm done I wash my hands and head back out to lizzie doing some stretches, I can't help but Stare at her ass fuck it's so perfect, no y/n snap out of it don't think like a sleazy man your better than that "oh your back I started to do some warm up stretches " she smiles looking at my eyeline fuck she caught me "ok let's get started let's do some warm ups 20 jumping Jack's let's go" I start doing them and lizzie follows my lead as she stands infront of me "9..10..11" I breath out fuck I should have wore tight shorts I can feel my dick swinging like there's no tomorrow "18..19...20" I stop and try to fix myself subtly, I need to change "great work lizzie I need to go change my shorts these are to baggy and annoying me " I lie "you can do some more jumping Jack's till I get back" as I turn to walk away she grabs my wrist "y/n I think you should keep them on I enjoy the view to much" I feel the heat rising to my face has she been checking out my dick, naughty girl "are you sure" I rub my neck and look at the floor

"yep it's one of my favourite parts about coming to train every week" she states with a sly smile "ok Olsen let's do some squats then lunges" after a 30 minute warm up and lots of well noticed attention on my dick I wipe my face and throw lizzie a clean towel "ok boxing gloves let's practice those right hooks " I get into position as lizzie goes to work she's improved a lot "well done lizzie you've came so far those hooks are lethal " I say genuinely proud of how far she's came "ok let's get you on the treadmill for 10 minutes to finish up" we head to the treadmill as she starts her run I sit and watch with my arms crossed fuck her ass bounces just right I feel a twitch in my Shorts no fuck no not here "um lizzie that was great for today ill see you next week I need to go to the bathroom have a great night" I say my goodbye and jog to the bathroom and head into a stall looking down at my dick "seriously dude looking at lizzies perfect ass jiggle and you wake up"

I mumble and hear a giggle from the other side of the door "glad I'm not the only one who looks" fuck its lizzie "shit I'm sorry lizzie" she just giggles "it's OK but can you come out here so I can talk to you and not a door" she says sweetly "I ahhh I can't right now lizzie I have a problem " I sigh leaning my head against the door "y/n you either open the door and come out or I come in" it sounds like she has a smirk I sigh in defeat and open the door as she comes in and locks it instantly looking down at my harden member "fuck" she almost moans out I can't help myself I hold her cheeks and crash my lips against hers pulling her flush against me in a heated kiss after a minute we break apart for air "I wanted to to do that for so long " she confesses running her hands down towards my dick i feel her pushing my shorts and boxers down and moan "if you don't want this just say" she whispers as she leans forward kissing my chest "I want this so fucking bad lizzie " she smirks and wraps her hand around my dick and starts to jack me off slowly "fuck you're so big baby, you're gonna wreck my pussy" she moans making me moan more I start to push her gym leggings down and cup her bare core, oh god she's soaking wet that is almost enough to make me bust "so fucking wet lizzie, is this all for me" I bite my lip and her hand works me faster and I insert my fingers into her dripping core "fuckk y/n all for you, shit that feels amazing"

I pick up my pace fingering her tight cunt, I slide my fingers out and suck them one by one locking eye contact and smirking "bend over princess " I state and she giggles bending over giving me the perfect view of her ass and pussy I get into position behind her and rub my member through her fold teasing her clit gently slapping it "fuck this is finally happening" she moans out as I slide my dick inside her slowly fuck she's so fucking tight and warm and dripping I need to compose myself or I'm gonna nut to quick, I slide in till all 8 inches disappear inside her "oh fuckkkkk y/n please fuck me" she whimpers I grip her hips and start to thrust slowly enjoying the feeling if her wrapped around my cock "mmh fuck so tight and wet lizzie, are you on the pill" I moan as I increase my thrusts snapping my hips back and forth "yes yes yesssss" she screams and I continue to thrust feeling lizzie cum all over my cock, I continue to thrust chasing my own high the sounds of her wet pussy being destroyed by cock is fucking glorious "fuckkk lizzie im" I breath out slamming in one final time shooting my load deep inside her waiting cunt as she cums around my dick again "gonna cum..." I breath out leaning forward kissing her back, I keep inside her for a minute before sliding out smirking at my cum dripping out of her cunt as she whimpers "fuck lizzie that was amazing" I say looking at her and we both giggle "now I think this work out should be added to our weekly work out " she says biting her lip "fuck definitely " i smirk watching her, after a few minutes we leave the bathroom and I walk her to her car "see you next week miss Olsen " I wink and walk back inside

AN: if you want anything message me requests I do them right away 😇word count is 1.3k hope you enjoy feedback welcome good or bad (i hope you guys enjoy these bc its 3am and ive been doing these for hours lmao its a lil more time consuming than i thought having to go over everything to highlight and bold everything that needs to be haha, show them some love please votes ect<3

[luthien-under-bough]

signature - Daemon Targaryen x Rhaenyra Targaryen

Not Rated, 1225 words, Text fic, Prompt Fic, Modern AU

Summary:

Daemon gets drunk on a boys' night out - and decides to demonstrate his love for Rhaenyra in a rather permanent way.

Written for the HotD Summer Snippets & Stories prompt event.

Prompt word: signature

Italics is Daemon Bold is Rhaenyra

friday, 3:45pm

do i have to go yes rather stay home with you im not staying home im going out with laena ;) you know what i mean brat oh stop, you’ll have fun plus laenor and the boys need an old man to show them how it’s done im having 3 drinks max then im coming home whatever you say, love and dont think ill forget that 'old' comment youll pay for that later oh im counting on it :) now get back to work!

friday, 6:00pm

how do i look? [ATTACHMENT: (1) IMAGE] oh fuck you are you SURE i cant convince you stay home?? 0:) have fun old man xx

friday, 7:14pm

im the only one here why is no one ever on time being early is very uncool im not early! im punctual! if youre on time youre early need to be at least 15 min late im rolling my eyes so hard right now oh heres laenor and harwin finally laenor is already pissed LOL laena says hi [ATTACHMENT: (1) IMAGE] tell laena she needs to teach her brother how to hold his liquor

friday, 8:10pm

this pub smells like piss and regret im too old for this shit loosen up baby take a couple shots cant even remember the last time i did a shot all the more reason to do one! youre a bad influence i learned from my uncle ;) your uncle sounds hot oh he is he does shots, too does he? mmhm cmon, ill send a pic of my tits if you do

friday, 8:16pm

[ATTACHMENT: (1) IMAGE] atta boy believe im owed a tit two, even patience!

friday, 8:21pm

[ATTACHMENT: (3) IMAGES] fuck now im hard prove it

friday, 8:25pm

[ATTACHMENT: (2) IMAGES] mm maybe i shouldve stayed home still time ditch laena say the word ill leave right now think i like the idea of u having a wank in a pub bathroom instead fucking tease yeah. what are you gonna do abt it? :) adding to the list of things to punish you for fair i deserve a firm spanking ;) youll get more than that

friday, 9:11pm

well?? did u cum? in the bloody bathroom stall? im not an animal rhaenyra tsk tsk wheres ur sense of adventure come here and ill show you wouldnt dream of crashing boys night what if i beg i do like when u beg so is that a yes...? have another drink ;) youll regret saying that when youre holding my hair back later

friday, 9:57pm

kept doing shots terrible idea think im drunk now thats the spirit! harwin wants to go to a strip club have a lapdance i like when u come home all riled up ;) dont need a lapdance for that can just look at that pic of your tits again flatterer its true. best tits in all of westeros what abt essos? dont be greedy :'(ok ok best tits in all of essos too. and sothoryos and ulthos while were at it thats more like it :)

friday, 10:46pm

see8ng naked women ujst mkes me miss you :(( aww <3 how drunk are you?? lmao im serous tour so beuatiful i miss you[MISSED CALL: ♡Daemon♡]

friday, 10:48pm

sry love too loud here were at karaoke im up next gonna sing You're So Vain is rhat about me i bet you think so ;)

friday, 11:53pm

awful quiet over there u still alive? YES yes sintbe a brat Have s durprise for you layer oh gods laena just dropped me off heading to bed xx naked??? of course probe it

saturday, 12:02am

[ATTACHMENT: (3) IMAGES] i lvoe toy youre so fuscking hot sexiedt woman on esrth goodnight&lt;3

saturday, 1:40am

[MISSED CALL: ♡Daemon♡]

saturday, 1:41am

[MISSED CALL: ♡Daemon♡]

saturday, 1:42am

[MISSED CALL: ♡Daemon♡]

saturday, 1:45am

[ATTACHMENT: (2) IMAGES] WHAT IS THAT DAEMON! OMG ??? i love you baby xxxx i love you somuh much oh my god hahahaah you are going to be SO MAD at yourself tomorrow

saturday, 12:04pm

"About time you woke up. Thought you were dead." Daemon squints, the light sending a blinding pulse of pain directly between his eyes. He can barely lift his head, but he can see just enough to know he somehow made it into his own bed. His head is swimming, his mouth tastes like an ashtray, and he can tell by the way the sheets rub against him that he's completely naked. Beside him, slightly blurred, is Rhaenyra, wearing an undeniably smug grin. "How did I—" "Harwin poured you out of a cab around three a.m."  Harwin. Right. Boys' night with Harwin and Laenor. "Fucking hells, I drank way too much," Daemon groans, shoving his face back into the pillows. "That's not all you did," Rhaenyra says cryptically. Daemon lifts his head, craning his neck to get another look at Rhaenyra. She's smiling broadly, pointing a finger vaguely in the direction of his back. That's when he's hit with a stinging surge of pain in his lower back. Oh shit. Oh fuck.  "Don't worry, love. I took a photo. The ones you sent me were rather blurry."  Rhaenyra holds up her phone, right in front of his face. He blinks a few times, praying that each one might resest his brain and reveal that he's just imagining it—but the tingling sensation tells him it's very much real. A tattoo, right about his ass, in large, curling script: Rhaenyra "Oh my god." "That's what I said," Rhaenyra says. Daemon groans. Pieces of the night return to him in flashes: doing that first shot, then another, then another. Several anothers later and they were at a strip club. Somewhere around their third bottle of Veuve Clicquot, Daemon became convinced that he simply must get a tattoo in honor of Rhaenyra. And Laenor and Harwin apparently did nothing to talk him out of it. "What I'd like to know," Rhaenyra says, unable to keep the giddiness from her voice. "Is where you got my signature from? It's a perfect likeness."  That memory returns to him, too. A fragmented image of him waving a dinner receipt around like a lunatic. He sighs loudly. "I had a receipt in my wallet. From when we went to that Dornish restaurant. You paid." Rhaenyra laughs wickedly. "Oh, I can only imagine what it would have looked like had you not had a reference on hand."  "I'm going to kill Harwin," Daemon mutters. Rhaenyra sinks down beside him, stroking him lightly along his spine, careful not to disturb his fresh ink.  "Oh, come now. I rather like it." Daemon turns his head to the side to narrow his gaze at her. "You do not." "I do!" she insists, her eyes sparkling. "It's sweet. You love me so much you're willing to permanently disfigure yourself. Quite romantic, honestly."  Daemon can't help but laugh. "Suppose I'll keep it, then." "Yes, you have to. How else will the whole world know that you're mine?" Daemon reaches out to cup Rhaenyra's face. His beautiful wife. He strokes her cheek, and her smile outshines any other thought or feeling rattling around in his head. "In that case, it's only fair..." he trails off, raising an eyebrow. "What?" "You'll just have to get one to match." 

[ao3 link]

*banner by wandanatromanova

[miniimapp]

Chat Room Pt. 2 - Aaron Z

Gen ;; Fluff - Story

Warnings ;; No ??

Proofread + Edited ;; You should know by now

Auth. Note ;; WELCOME TO DAY 22 OF THE 4*TOWN CHRISTMAS COUNTDOWN !!

This is one of many posts tonight, so please go check out the advent calendar pinned to my page for each day's post :DD

Enjoy !! <3

✄┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈«

not_interested: ok promise this is the last time I bother you tonight but omfg they have a drink WALL with all kinds of teas and coffees and other stuff..

not_interested: idk about you but that just screams fancy to me

not_interested: i would ask how tf you managed to afford that hotel room BUT YOU FORGOT TO MENTION YOURE RICH AND FAMOUS SO..

ringshooter: in my defence

ringshooter: when tf was i supposed to bring it up???

ringshooter: just out of nowhere oh btw i'm part of a famous boyband.. yh cus that wouldve gone well

not_interested: ok valid

not_interested: but still, some warning wouldve been v nice

ringshooter: yh alr ill remember that for next time shall i?? 🙄

not_interested: the sass on you today.. smh

ringshooter: its 2am..

not_interested: ..valid

ringshooter: id recommend sleep if you dont wanna be shattered in front of the boys tomorrow lmao

not_interested: and id do that if i wasnt currently obsessint over a hotel the room the size of my whole house basically

ringshooter: valid but not helpful rn

ringshooter: the funniest part is you weren't even in here for more than 5 mins..

ringshooter: go sleep

not_interested: omg fine dad

ringshooter: never again

not_interested: yh no i hated that too

not_interested: kinda just felt icky

ringshooter: sleep

not_interested: aye aye captain 🏴‍☠️

ringshooter: 😒

✄┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈«

Your phone slips out of your hand and onto the bed as you flop back onto the mattress. You close your eyes and feel a sappy smile worm its way across your face. Just earlier you'd been hanging out with ringshooter.. Z, sorry, after he'd gotten off of his flight and tomorrow.. well, today actually, you'll be meeting the boys™.

You've been spamming Z whenever you get mildly nervous.. which is every 2 seconds it seems. It's not like you can help it though, he just has that calming effect on you, some may find his blasé attitude careless but to you it's freeing.

As the minutes tick by and the early hours pass into what some may coin as reasonable you finally drift off to sleep, your slumber that is much too quickly ended by your dozens of alarms going off.

Look, no judgement, you've just been known to sleep through your alarms before so 10+ alarms confirms whether your dead to world or waking up on time.

With a groan you pat around your bedside table until your hand land on your phone and you turn of your alarm. You drag yourself up into a sitting position and go through all the other alarms set to follow and turn all of them off too. Somehow you'd only slept through 3 today, must be a miracle.

You quickly skim through your notifications, not-so-secretly hoping to see one from ringshooter Z

✄┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈«

ringshooter: the guys

ringshooter: read: t and tae

ringshooter: have decided we absolutely have to go bowling today

ringshooter: that alright with you???

✄┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈«

You smiled as you found the notification and opened up your chat; you read through every word before shooting back a text of your own

✄┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈«

not_interested: no problems with that

not_interested: i know a place that does some really good food as well

not_interested: btw we doing those like side bumper things or no ??

ringshooter: sounds good

ringshooter: just send me the location and we'll meet you there

ringshooter: robaire insists on using those side thingies (wtf are they called???) so yh we are

not_interested: sweetness

not_interested: sending location now

not_interested: see ya

ringshooter: 👍🏾

✄┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈«

You resist the urge to squeal and kick your legs like a a pre-teen in one of those rubbish coming of age movies.

Now that you know the plan and you have an incentive to get up and seize the day, you find it much less of a struggle to leave you bed so you can wash up, get dressed and have a bite to eat before you leave.

You decide to walk to the bowling alley because it's more environmentally friendly and, more importantly, you're too broke to get public transport.

It takes longer than you'd anticipated but once you're finally at the bowling alley you open up you chat with Z

✄┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈«

not_interested: im here, meet me outside

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It only takes a couple of second for your phone to light up with the notification of a new message from ringshooter.

✄┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈«

ringshooter: i can see you 👀

not_interested: okay weirdo get over here so i can beat your ass at bowling

ringshooter: i think you'll find im the one will be winning today lmao

not_interested: dream on loser

✄┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈«

You thank whatever higher being warned you of your online friend's celebrity status and his celebrity friends before this because as you watch them walk towards you, you find yourself growing more and more intimidated. It's so weird being the center of 5 objectively attractive men's attentions, how the fuck no one's died from skyrocketing blood pressure at their concerts you will never know.

With a quick mental cleanse you rid yourself of any thoughts of their celebrity-ness, they came here to hang out and be normal people and so help you God you will not ruin this for them!

A widening grin makes its way onto your face as lock eyes with Z, "Hey, tiny."

You immeditaly puff up at the nickname, "I am not tiny, you're just an obscenely tall motherfucker!"

"Our point exactly!" Two voices chorus from behind Z, the owner of the louder of the two voices, bounds over to you, "I'm T, that's Tae and you are going to be our new favourite."

Tae nods and practically skips over, "Just because we're not 7 fucking feet tall doesn't mean we're short, but some people seem to forget that due to being taller than Mount fucking Everest! Glad to finally meet someone who's simply correct."

T looks likes a broken bobblehead simply from the force of his nods, "Robaire's not even that much taller than us, maybe like a couple inches, so the short jokes are just low hanging fruit at this point, not a pun!"

You smile brightly at both of them, "Nice to meet you both, I have a feeling we'll become great allies!"

The other tall one, who, by process of elimination is probably Jesse, speaks up, "Okay, enough squabbling, how about we go inside before we get stared at even more."

Robaire nods, "Agreed, plus I would kill for a bowling alley slushie right now."

You eyes narrow as you turn to him, "What flavour?"

He looks at you in return, he's eyes narrowing as well, "The only correct flavour there is, the blue one."

You straighten up and nod approvingly before turning to Z, "Looks like I've found a better partner in crime, someone who knows their bowling alley slushies and doesn't choose the red one over the blue one."

T gasps dramatically making you laugh, "I can't believe you said the red one over the blue one, everyone knows you have to get blue because it changes your tongue to blue."

Z rolls his eyes, "Who cares about omgue colour if it doesn't taste as good as the red one."

This time you gasp dramatically, one of hands flying to forehead in shock, "I can't believe you just said that! The blue one is way better tasting than the red one!"

Jesse sighs, "You guys are worse than my kids."

Tae smiles dangerously, "You're only saying that because you secretly like the red one more."

T turned to Jesse with a look of betrayal plastered across his face, "Is it true? Have you truly gone to the dark side!?"

Jesse scoffs, "I'd hardly call liking the red one over the blue one going to the dark side."

T fake sobs into your shoulder, "He does! He's betrayed us!" You pat T on the arm comfortingly, "It's alright, just because they don't understand doesn't change the fact that most people prefer the blue one."

Robaire sniffs, "Betrayed by my very own friends, whatever did I do to deserve this heartbreak."

Z groans, "What the fuck is this, man.."

T stares at Tae accusingly, "So, are you team blue or team red?"

Tae smiles innocently and replies, "I hate slushies!"

He then skips off into the bowling place leaving the rest of the group in shock..

"WHAT!?"

..

"Do they have actual favours or are they just the blue one and the red one?"

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Hope you enjoyed !! <3

[todayisawthewhxlewxrld]

YEAH!! I've seen people have 0 asks posted, but have so much interaction on their actual account. Personally, I would LOVE to interact with my community. Yk if I could muster up the courage to actually post 💀

Honestly we should just switch, cause I used to be up 24/7, got like 3 hours of sleep and I'd be up bright and early just living life, twas the best

But now I fear that I sleep like an elderly man 😞 I take naps all the time, for several hours, then sleep around 9-10 pm, if my friends call max is about 1:30 am AND THEN I SLEEP UNTIL 3 IN THE AFTERNOON TO MAKE UP FOR IT?? It's crazy FR.

AND YOU'RE SO RIGHT, megumi isn't megumi without his persistent denies, it just fits him 🤞😋

No but seriously, I'm considering writing something and posting it but I'm TERRIFIED of criticism, and I am BALLS at writing 😭 Though I might post artwork, been storing for winter 😽

It's 15 mins after 9, and I am afraid that my friend will call me as soon as I answer this "hi" they sent.. 😣

Xoxo 👽 (Feeling the extra happiness, so I'm gonna quickly tell you how much I love how you wrote Megumi, like I love his angsty teen energy, and the sonic memes fit him so well 💀 You're BRILLIANTLY talented at fitting characters personalities. CAN'T WAIT FOR TOMORROW, SPELLBOUND MAKES ME EXCITED TO WAKE UP 😽)

that’s actually crazy omg… anons and asks r like what makes tumblr for me LMFAO i love interacting with ppl… i mean i guess i could slightly understand if ur getting like ur ask box flooded everyday but like NOTHING???? NONE OF THEM???

YOU SLEEP LIKE AN ELDERLY MAN KFMAOAOOA i used to sleep like that too don’t worry!! it happens to the best of us i fear…

NOOOO U SHOULD POST UR WRITING!!!! i’m also terrified of criticism and somehow i have.. gotten none in the time of been here?? idk i feel like i don’t see a lot of ppl get criticism here or if it is it’s not even about the writing it’s about like posting schedule and wanting them to post faster or smth…. ANYWAY U WONT KNOW UNLESS U TRY BUT REGARDLESS OF IF U DO OR DONT ILL SUPPORT U ! (heh is choso somewhere in ur art… cause if so sign me up…)

BYE thank god none of my friends like calling amen 🙏

THANK U SM BAE UR SO SWEET I WILL START CRYING AND DRY HEAVING RN STOP IT!!!!!

[mwahmichelle]

4.10.23

Dear Diary ❤︎

today was so nice, right until the end ✨

the morning was pretty chill. i went grocery shopping with my father and sister at 8 am, then had lessons till 3 pm. during one of my classes, i put the last of my gisou oil in my hair, and applied a clay face mask :) i love taking care of myself 🫶🏼

we did a lot of packing in the early afternoon. not much else happened until later on, when we went to the mall!!

first, we went to ladurée for some macarons. i had a bite of one of my mothers, but left mine for tomorrow))

next up was sephora!! the two things that i needed, i couldn’t get 😭 the drunk elephant babyfacial, and the tatcha cleansing oil 💔💔 my cleanser is finishing and they dont sell it in my city. what am i to do??? (im being dramatic, i have three other cleansers back home, and got one more today 💀) (mini haul below 🎀)

we also went to victoria’s secret 😽 i measured my bra size for the first time since i was 13 and it turns out im a 34C?!? im still in shock tbh. i got bra/undie set, a pj set, and a matching robe🫶🏼

we finished off the evening with a trip to the cinema. we watched The Creator and omg???? absolutely devastating. i have only good things to say about that movie. i rarely say that anything is a 10/10, but this… it definitely deserves it. honestly it was amazing i cried so much 😭

haul time!!

sephora:

- gisou hair oil, my love

- glow recipe serum cus i felt it caling to me 🤭

- the tatcha set to make up for the aforementioned cleanser

- dior hand cream (wanted chanel, but they were kinda rude so nvm)

- dior mascara. my sister wanted it but changed her mind, so i took it 😋

- the gucci lipstick i am so excited about. the case is so so so cute, and the colour is stunning on me 😻 (the lady at the gucci section gave me a gift 🥺💕)

victoria’s secret:

undie and bra not pictured cus 🤨🤨

excuse my awful photography, i was too lazy to take good photos (same with the ones above lmao)

the pjs match the robe!!! i had the same set when i was 13, im getting deja vu 🥺 i got an m cus old habits die hard 😭 oversize for the win ig 😵‍💫

that was my day todayyyy 😽😽 i had so much fun writing this all out and adding photos, tho i wish i had my real diary with me :( who knows, maybe ill keep doing it here ✨

its 1:30, so im off to bed

goodnight xoxo

[cora0rr3m]

Earlier this afternoon/morning (i dont remember), one of my mutuals suggested i share yall my iahb au!!! Its called the iahb coraverse au (obviously named after me)

Its basically just a combination of ALL of my iahb headcanons and i somehow made it into this story and to me it makes sense so lets go-

💥⚠️ A few TW’s: This will mention death, bullying and other possible triggering topics, please read with caution!!

(Keep in mind all of this is in my au and is not by ANY means canon, also might make another part to this post because its so long omg)

——————————-

Setting:

All of this takes place in England, the school, where sher lives and so on and so forth

The time and year sherwin studies at Newgate is in the same year the film was released, 2017. The time Sherwin goes to school is in September, (according to my research is the usual time where schools in England start, please correct me if your a fellow brit thx)

The time where Sher’s backstory took place is around 2015/2014

Basic Info:

Full name: Sherwin A. Aaronson

Age: 14

Bday: Feb 24 2004

Ethnicity: Half Scottish, Half American

Sexuality: Gay

Current residence: UK/England

Sherwin:

Backstory:

Sherwin’s parents are dead because of a very bad car accident that happened when he was around 10-11, the cause of the accident was because of a drunk driver who swerved up on them while they were headed to the airport to visit sher’s relatives in the US. (He is half Scottish Half American) And he still has major PTSD from it, and some scars on his back and some on his arms, legs and most of them are on his torso. Ever since the incident he hates highways and always paranoid of other cars. His aunt, Fiona Anderson, has been taking care of our ginger since then, she is very protective and caring for sherwin! She doesent know what to do without Sherwin, and the same for Sherwin.

Sherwin sadly also has trauma from being bullied all the time since the start of middle school. People from his old school bullied him for what he wears (more on that later), being weak and a “coward”, for his looks,, etc. It got SO bad to the point he has developed selective mutism, and of course he was always in the principal’s office because of this, he was blamed for stuff he didnt even do. And, of course auntie fiona got involved aswell, thats why she decoded to transfer sherwin to one of the prestigious schools in the city, Newgate Junior Highschool in hopes that he wont get bullied again but he still kinda does. But thankfully in Newgate he makes a few friends like Jonathan who stays by his side <3

Identity:

Sherwin is trans (ftm), and he kinda knew when he was around 9, he doesn’t know back then what being trans is, but all he knows is that he really didnt like being a “girl” doing “girl” stuff, he actually felt off and uncomfortable back then. He was bullied for what he wears, (like i said earlier), because he usually wears big hoodies, long pants and other clothes students considered to be “Boys’s clothes” that matches his identity. But despite ALL of that, auntie fiona happily accepted sherwin for who he was. Sherwin doesent realize, but thats all that really matters. <3

At the start he really didnt know what his sexuality was, but all he knew is that he kinda liked boys. (Spoiler alert: he does like boys by ALOT)

Personality:

According to a personality site sherwin is actually an INFP so ill say the same for coraverse sherwin.

Ok so, i might edit this tomorrow and add more stuff but rn im SOO sleepy, but please tell me your thoughts and opinions on my au!! Tysm

[omggitzflutterzx3]

hi tumblr! ^^ last night was crayyzayyy ives never done anything like that and im still alll weirddd O.o itz hard to even remembur what happened. we watched all the back to the future movies and we ate so much food and laughed so much and then. uhhhh OMG NO WAY. NO WAY THAT ACTAULY HAPPENED OMG. cant say that that is too embarrasing. omg omg. but anygays it was really fun and DRUGS feels so nice i have no anxiety or anything! we've just been sitting on the couch watching survivor all day and eating lots of snax lollll awesome sunday!! X3 today is also the last day before twilight gets back!!!! :O!!! she wont be back until late tomorrow night but that's still tomorrow and im gonna stay up super late to make sure im there to greet her when she gets home im so excited!!!! gonna be clinging to her for the whole week i miss her so much hehehehhee ^c^

everything is still supperr like foggy and stuff from last night but im feeling reallyy great and i should have more to say tomorrow lol! i have school acutally so maybe ill talk about that! thats all for this evening bye bye tumblr love you!! <3<3<3 ~Flutterz 05/12/10(˃ᆺ˂)

[salaciousslut]

You really wanna trust me to get you drunk princess?<3 And what can i say? i love tits and i know yours would feel nice in my hands<3 plus its not my fault when you had been talking about how sensitive they've been🫣 trust me ive thought about it a lot tonight 🥺 especially since im crossfaded

I think struggling just ties it all together<3 I wish I could feel you struggle under me rn🥺 i know you'd be so cute<3

You flatter me sweetheart<3 Im not that impressive yet🤭

Fish is literally god tier i could eat fish for the rest of my life and be happy, i also love beef but i could give it up if i had a supply of fresh fish

You're too cute sweetheart<3 i wish i could join you tomorrow i'd cut my own hair if it meant being able to join you<3

No anything thats hot limon flavored is so good, 10/10 selection imo. And i feel you with sauces, like it just adds to the flavor🤭also youre so valid!! Im not against it being warm but i do prefer pies and cobblers cold. So i can understand where youre voming from!

Please i would die to hear you be vocal cause of me🥺 ive been told that im good with my mouth so i'd love to hear what you think princess<3

hehe yes!!! you can do whatever u want with me!! plus u said u take care of ur friends, so i trust u!! also lemme come take care of u while ur crossed babe!!! or i can just give u a show! whatever u want

my tits are perfect for being held!! theyre the perfect size for each hand imo!! and just know babe, youll get good morning tits, good night tits, a few orgasm vids, maybe a lil fashion show every day if i could spoil u!!! hehe plus ill send u lil life update videos and stuff!! anything else u want? ill give it to u

me too!! plus struggling just means u get to overpower me hehe and i loveeeeee when people make me feel small!!

yes im a fish girl!! love it sm!! i also eat a lot of chicken too!! yum i love food hehe

omg 🥺🥺 stop flirting with me im blushing!!! i wanna see how good u first handedly and them snuggle up with u when im all fucked out

[xxfangz]

☆ ፧ 09/24/23 # SUNDAY, end of the weekend :(

tw's : none — all photos are mine :)

[ 1:29 pm ]

goood afternoon :) ! i woke up about an hour ago and showered, in a bit im going to go eat at waffle house!!!! then sometime today we're going grocery shopping and working on my room! im obsessed with 2014-2016 tumblr rn and i dont know why omg. BUT IM SO EXCITED TO DYE MY HAIR. i keep wanting to ask my dad when hes scheduling it but i have talked about dying my hair too much and hes slightly annoyed ٩( ᐛ )و

[ 2:40pm]

we just got back from waffle house it was sooo good! my dad said hes gonna work on my room some more :3

[ 4:54 pm ]

hes working on my room rn i think :) im having a slighhhtttt identity crisis lol 😭 by slight i mean a huge identity crisis its NOT FUN. so i may change a shit ton of things on this blog but the concept will stay the same. i dont think we're gonna dye my hair today but thats ok! im lookig for a secondary nickname or something

[ 6:27 pm ]

im fucking dizzy and nauseous, im drinking water but god damn. im in a shitty mood bc i feel lonely and im stressed as fuck. i wanna cry but ill get comforted and i dont want that right now. im tired and whatever. dad's still working on my room rn :) and i should be going to the store later.

[ 10:02 pm ]

i went to the store and got some dinner a bit ago. im probably going to go to bed soon! i didnt get that many photos today and i didnt write much today but thats alright! its part of the procress :) but ill probably write more tomorrow, since i have school and i get pretty bored there!

[ 12:12am ]

okay im not gonna add anything else to this post so im gonna end it here! im really emotionally drained and don't feel the best. ill be active a bit more tonight, but thats the end of today's entry!

GOODNIGHT / GOOD MORNING! HAVE A GOOD DAY AND A GOOD WEEK <3

[star2sworld]

Hey. Long time no see sorry lol.

Okay, let’s get right into it. School started yesterday.. I had a really bad first day of school. Found out the guy I had liked a lot in middle school (he bullied me & is the reason I have extreme body dysmorphia) is in my 8th period class. I found out in 3rd period and I was having really bad anxiety and was stressed out for the rest of the day. I ended up crying in a few classes because I couldn’t hold it back anymore. When I got to 8th he kept glancing at me but it wasn’t even bad. We didn’t have to Introduce us to the class so I’m thankful. I came home and cried for 2 hours thinking if I’m even worth loving. After a few hours I did my English work and we had to find a quote that described our true self and we had to explain why we think it’s powerful and as I was searching I came across lizard wiz and she reminded me who I am. So grateful I did bc after that I realized he bullied me a verryyy long time ago and it’s about time I moved on. Yes, it had a really big impact and it affected me heavily but he’s irrelevant. Haven’t spoke to him in years I can’t let him control my life anymore. I can’t be scared to see him bc we do go to the same school and we have the same lunch ha shocker. Yesterday at lunch I asked this girl if I can sit by her bc she was alone and then her friends came in a few mins and they literally ignored my entire existence so that was great lol. I felt so awkward I literally just journaled. I felt too anxious to even get food so I didn’t eat.

Day 2 ( today )

- today classes felt much much better. I love my 1st and 2nd. 3rd period is a bit boring but it’s not too bad. Fourth I have art and I luv art !! It’s a relaxing class. Then I have lunch… I decided to sit somewhere else today. I sat at a long table. One half was filled with guys but there was a bit of space left near the windows so I went and sat there. Then I turned around and put my leg in one of the chair ish things and a few mins later some group of guys started calling me from their table. “ hey lady “ “ ayo “ “ she doesn’t hear u she has headphones in “ … next minute I hear “ HE WANT UR NUMBER! “ I turned around back to my seat so quick lol. Idk who even wanted my number but they were Nepali and sophomores pretty sure. Don’t think they’re my type either lol. I went to go get lunch ALL BY MYSELF! I think that’s a lot of improvement compared to yesterday :) I ran into COMBINATION ( guy who bullied me & his friend I thought was so fine last year ) let’s call them double P’s combination Alr. I literally kept running into them at lunch it was acc awkatd every time they saw me they just looked down. Can’t tell if they find me ugly or attractive don’t know but I like lunch I like seeing them p #2 ( his friend ) lol then I had history and we reviewed imperialism , capitalism, & socialism. It was interesting lol. Us owns nothing in china while china owns hundred in the us. Then I went to English , i actually love my teacher. She’s so motherly I feel safe with her. She’s so nice and real 😭. I literally like all my teachers their funny and acc entertaining. THEN 8th period happened omg. We got assigned seats n I sit very far from P #1 (bully) thank god. I sit far back opposite side of him :))) when the teacher was showing his classroom n the poster behind me p looked right at me n I felt sooo awkward lol but it’s alright.

That’s about it. I had no homework tonight so yeah. It’s 10:30 I’m tired. I’m heading to bed just thought I’d write since I haven’t in a week ish. Ama is coming tomorrow so I’m happy and I might go to Erie on Friday :) I’m going to wake up at 4:50 am tmr so I can shower in the morning. Felt to lazy to shower tonight lol. Anyways, I’m happy this year I feel focused. My goal is all A’s & loving myself. My main goals. I also got catfished by a girl lol but ill talk about it tmr bc there’s a lot of things to unwrap. Anyways goodnight.

See you guys tomorrow ;))) hopefully tmr is a good day. Stay positive babes

[meismalis]

I’m getting major dental surgery and I’m scared as fuck, haha. I had a bad experience at the dentist last time where I had to get my right bottom wisdom tooth out and the molar next to it because it had grown in sideways and cracked the molar and instead of fixing the molar, I decided to just take it out with the wisdom and that molar barely fit in my mouth anyways as I have a small mouth, haha. So when I got that procedure done, I was scared one bit or anxious, I’ve had dental work before, cavities filled, a root canal on my left molar and my two front teeth, like 3/4 of them are fake 😂 (when I was like 10, I lifted up a patio chair expecting it to be heavy but it wasn’t and it smashed straight into my face and teeth and broke my two front teeth right off, so they like made the bottom like 3/4 of my front teeth and glued/Moulded them on to what was left)

So I had work done before, had plenty of local anesthesia needles…. Well. This time, the dentist gave me the needle and we waited a bit and he did the thing to test if I was numb, pushed on my gum in the area and like tapped on the top of the tooth, and my lips were numb, so we obviously thought we were good to go. So he took the scalpel type thing and pushed it down into the side of the tooth and under so he could like pop it up and out (they don’t actually use pliers 😂) and the MINUTE he did that, I felt the most intense searing pain I have EVER felt, my whole face and neck and like inner Jaw nerves and bones were on fire, deeeeeepp down pain. It was crazy and I my body started to shake. I reactively screamed bloody fucking murder and he stopped and was like what the fuck and I was like “I FUCKING FELT THAT OMG I FELT EVERYTHING” and he gave me another shot, then tried again slowly and I felt it, another shot, felt it, another shot, still felt it. So at this point, he gave me all of the anesthesia shots he could and he said “well, you’re gonna have to go to the other location in town tomorrow and try the nitrous oxide (laughing gas) because we don’t have any at this location.” It was the end of the business day and they were closing and so was the other Mount Pearl location and the thought of going home with the half popped out tooth in my mouth still and having to wait until tomorrow and come back and go through it all again, I was just like “no. Just do it. As quick as you can” and I bunkered down, held onto the chair with a fucking DEATH GRIP and prepared. He continued and got it out, with me nearly breaking the arms off of the chair and my legs kicking the bottom of the chair. It was FUCKED. and like, the wisdom tooth that came out of my head was HUUUUUUGE, even he was like “that is one of the biggest wisdom teeth I’ve ever seen, it’s up there.” and I was like 👍 yeah. great, doc, can I leave? I got up almost immediately because I just wanted to leave and I started to see black and fell back a bit and then regained my composure, almost fainting. I was white as a fucking ghost and shaking and I have a fairly high pain tolerance, at least in my opinion, and people have told me this before and so have a lot of medical professionals.

When I got home, my fiancé saw me and was like, “holy FUCK, you look like you’ve seen a ghost, are you okay?!? No seriously babe, you look deathly ill right now, are you okay?”

So, it’s safe to say, ever since then, I have been TERRIFIED OF THE DENTIST.

Anyways, fast forward a couple years and I started having really bad stomach issues, my anxiety and panic attacks got really bad during that time period which cause a lot of nausea, heartburn, acid reflux issues, and I got a stress ulcer. So, I started to throw up everything day, like 5 times, upwards to 10 times a day, and most of the time I was just throwing up pure stomach acid, and this went on for about 6 months. Approx 3 months in, I noticed I had a good few cavities and my teeth were really sensitive and felt really weak, I kind of ignored it for like 2 weeks cause IM TERRIFIED OF THE DENTIST NOW, and just started to brush my teeth even more than I already was, and approx 3 weeks later, the cavities got a lot bigger in just 3 weeks and I noticed some decay was starting with the cavities, so I made a dentist appt and he loooked and said that yeah, decay was starting to set in but also, all the enamel on my teeth was stripped away and they were very weak, he said I already had very weak teeth genetically (I get cavities easily, can break teeth easily, etc cause I was born was weak teeth and it’s genetic) but he said this happened quicker and accelerated because I WAS BRUSHING THE STOMACH ACID INTO MY TEETH APPARENTLY WHICH LIKE NEVER OCCURRED TO ME???? YOURE NOT SUPPOSED TO BRUSH YOUR TEETH RIGHT AWAY AFTER THROWING UP. He said, you’re supposed to rinse with warm water with salt and then wait like an hour and then brush your teeth normally, but I was brushing right after I threw up, every time, which remember, was like 5-10 times a day, just PUREEEE stomach acid.

So anyways, I got all the cavities filled and this was approx a year and a half ago, about a year ago, I noticed more cavities, got those filled and then about 2 months ago, I noticed my teeth were getting more sensitive again and then the cavities I got filled, they were expanding and I was getting more cavities AGAIN andI went to the dentist and he said yeah, your teeth are just really weak and that time you basically stripped all the enamel off and the stomach acid, you’re gonna have to deal with a lot of issues and cavities every year, you’ll probably need a few root canals and as you get older, it’s just gonna get worse because again, genetically weak teeth. & like, Ive always took care of my teeth and brushed them every morning when I get up and every night before bed and sometimes during the day, I floss, everything. I just have genetically very weak problem teeth and then the stomach acid thing realllly messed them up. So yeah, He noticed as well that my back back molars, the gum line was pulling away and he did an X-ray and my back molars THEY WERE DECAYING FROM THE INSIDE OUT, so basically on the inside, it’s just all soft, and there’s just an outer shell, which he said, eventually they would just break.

ANYWAYS. He said that I’m always gonna have issues, and we can go ahead and fill the cavities again and that we can do root canals on the back molars or we can just pull em and replace em, but he recommended the latter as root canals are expensive and I’ll have to get more again to maintain it like every 8ish years. He then said that actually, what he thinks is beneficial for me, because im always gonna have issues now no matter what, is to just extract all of my top teeth (those are the problem ones) and then my bottom molar teeth, and we would keep my bottom teeth besides the molars as they’re fine and the enamel wasn’t badly eroded on those and no cavities or issues, we’d just straighten em up a bit to match the new top teeth.

So yeah, extract all of my top teeth and then get implants. Well, it’s an implanted denture essentially. It’s not a removable denture and it doesn’t have the like roof of the mouth piece, it’s literally just the “strip” of teeth and what they do is they extract all of the top teeth and then when you’re healed, you get like 4 holes drilled into your gum, up into your bone and then they screw screws into the holes and then implanted denture, it screw holes, and it just screws into place and it’s permanent, they’re super strong, you can eat everything, you can talk normally with no issue , etc. they’re like veneers! & THEY LOOK SOOOOOOO GOOD. Apparently a lot of celebrities have that done too, lol, they have like like glued on veneers for a while but to do those, the teeth need to shaved down and like eventually, they end up getting the teeth removed and an implanted denture, and they have such beautiful, striking smiles and no one knows, haha.

My dentist made me feel better too saying like, you’d be surprised how many women your age actually do have implanted dentures as well, as it’s a common thing (well not COMMON but less rare than you think) that women have like calcium issues and issues with their teeth and then during pregnancy, there’s this disease that happens where the moms teeth just get so weak and so bad and decay and just get destroyed during pregnancy and they end up having to get dentures. So I feel better about that.

I could just get removable top dentures as well but I didn’t wanna do that and the dentist Recommended I didn’t either because of bone loss. When you extract a bunch of teeth, you get bone loss bc your jaw bone has nothing to hold on to anymore and nothing to “work for” and then they start to shrink, bc they aren’t being used. Like in older people you’ll see what’s called “denture face” sometimes, and obv I don’t want that, and because I’m young, bone loss will set in by the time I’m like 34 bc it takes like 7 years for it to full come in.

SO YEAH, that’s what I’m doing. I’m Excited to not have to deal with all the issues and dental work all the time, AND I’ll have an AMAZINNNGGG smile and AMAZINGGG teeth, but anyways, I am fucking terrified because of my last experience 😳 even though they said, we’re gonna make sure you’re numb, you’ll have the anesthesia shots and we’ll have laughing bad for you but I’m still scared :( like I was reading articles on anaesthesia and dental anesthetic, and how it just doesn’t work on some people and how it actually is a thing and like I don’t know if that was just one off thing or if I’m gonna experience that again and I am terrified, but you know I it needs to be done and once it is, I’ll feel so much better and again I’ll have a beautiful smile so….

OH ALSO LOL 😂 😂 another reason I went with a fully implanted denture instead of just a removable top denture is because I thought about giving head and blow jobs and was like, well that top mouth piece, that would probably like move around or like my denture would come loose or fall out when giving head no?!? & I actually asked the dentist LMAOOO and he was like, they’re usually pretty secure once in there and with bond but yeah it’s a possibility 😂

AND MY FIANCÉ LMAOOOO HE WAS LIKE “Omg no don’t get implants, you could give me a gummer, apparently they feel amazing “ 😳 😳 😳 😂 😂 😂 I was like LMAO WHATTT & he goes “you’d have to pop it back in immediately after though 😂

and that’s another thing, I don’t wanna like take it out to sleep or whatever and have my fiancé see me without top fucking teeth LMAO

Anyways yeah

[carcinized]

hello june skycourthouse youre literally the coolest ever you are just. just. hmm i am so happy we are friends <3 it is sunny and and the leaves are pretty colors ill send u some pictures later maybe and i think im home alone and the world is just so pretty and i think you are just. you're sunshiney <3 i am listening to the song good morning sunlight by i fight dragons do you know that one? it makes me think of u :D its so warm and pretty also i love it :DDD

how are you today! it's sunday! today we are putting the sun in sunday i suppose at least where i live. i am uhh putting off homework. oops. i started a new minecraft hardcore world yestrday!! i found a village and made a silly little starter house that is literally just a box and also found a shipwreck but i cant navigate the map that was in it :< i have. so much laundry to do >_< and im just very warm rn! in multiple ways :) i am wearing the coziest sweater its lovely :]

its october 16 which is so many of my friends' birthdays so i forgot about the red festival ummm. im gonna rewatch tubbos pov of the red festival i think </3 OH ive eben working on the benchtrio ghosthunting au a bit im excited for that and also my other main project (aka: stardust projects onto tommy and ranboo is well hes certainly There.) ive been like outlining whats gonna happen and its gonna be cool :) im giving u a bouquet of flowers or a potted plant or just literally a piece of grass i hope youre doing well <3 im not ready for the weather to get colder but i do love the pretty colors and . sweaters :]]

LAJDFJ i wrote this in the afternoon.... its 10 pm now.... PFFT. okay pressing send. i do just frequemntly forget to do that huh

love ya ollie :D

awww thats so sweet, it was super foggy the past 2 days here for the first time its been sooo nice <3 and no i do not know that song :O

YOOOO HARDCORE!!! i have never done a hardcore world i have far too much rage inside me i dont think i could take that sort of loss, BUT ITS OK UR SLAYING i have Also been putting off folding my laundry... it is just in a pile on my floor Oops. I Forgor (my room is the messiest place in the universe rn Its Fine)

BUT WOOOO YEAH IT IS :D the red festival my beloved <333 THATS SO COOL THO GHOSTHUNTING AU THE BEST AU IN THE WORLD!!!! i think itll be aweomse also Omg Grass... the other day i was outside doing (activity) with friends and there was some really soft grass and i wanted to eat it but then i remembereed we were at Gross Public Place and though it was soft someone had probably thrown up on it before so i should Not put it in my mouth and it was very sad for me, i like how grass tastes but alas that grass would have been germy so yes anyways i am appreciating your grass. also i cant wait for the cold weather except for actually its just about as cold as itll get here already only it still warms up to like 80F in the afternoon so we just suffer bc we cant dress right, but its ok bc the past two days like i said its been foggy so :D i just need it to start raining so we can Heat Our House lmao we need it to be wet enough outside to make a fire w/o lighting half the country on fire LOL

and its ok king i get it. i am heading to bed Also now i think this is a late response sorry i didnt see this, but goodnight sleep well i hope you have a great day tomorrow!! love u :] <33

[thatfuzzyfamiliarspace]

Why did I have to get ill today :( always on a fricking Sunday or even better yet… a bank holiday -_- so the chemist won’t even be open tomorrow. Tescos shuts in 20 mins so yeah. I can’t get my sachets that help. Why I don’t have 3 boxes at home at all times just incase is beyond me. I just don’t wanna waste our day today. He’s going home tomorrow for the whole day to play games. Which is fine but means today is our day. And i was having sucha good time with him all morning. I was super duper haps. But the stupid water infection ruined ittttt, I woke up like oh shit not this, but then when we acc got up I was fine ?? And ngl I’m confused why he wanted to fuck me in the morning after I said I was ill.. not complaining, coz he was right, I wanted it. I just didn’t think he’d wanna come near me. Then he’s posting on tumblr about eating pussy and oh my god that’s all I want rn. I want him to eat me out but while I’m like this ?! Doesn’t seem right. It’s unfair that he gets me so horny when I shouldn’t be !! I just wanna be better to so we can fuck around some more. If I’m not gonna have him tomorrow then I wanna make the most of today ! But I should probably take heed of what he said yesterday night. It’s not the only time he’ll be here. We’ll have more whole days to spend and chill together. I need to not get hung up on it. The situation couldn’t be helped. I just wanna be betterrrrr. I’m mostly annoyed coz the little time was going so so well and it just got halted coz of this. And HE put me in the mindset ?!

Idk how he knew the perfect timing. I was laying there, cum’ed out and just fucked generally. My head was in the ditzy way and she was fighting to come out but I was so out of it I could barely stay with it. Then he started stroking my nose, that was it. I had to control over it. I couldn’t even partially suppress it. The whole rest of the morning he took care of her. Cuddles, food, treats, games. He didn’t say a single thing wrong. Just wanted it to last longer. It’s exciting to see things going so well in that area. And what’s even more odd is I noticed he was my FP this morning. Before all of that. Before we fucked. Idk why but it shifted back and that’s defo made me happier.

I wonder how he felt about it. Bless him he kept asking if we was doing okay and enough. Is he comfortable with it ? Like just the actual fact of it ? (Omg be legit just asked again if it was alright !! He’s so cute) but yeah Ik I’ve given him some anx about it by having these standards and things not going so smoothly previously and again what I’ve said. But I just hope excluding all of that, the he generally is okay with that whole side to me. I’ve realised how not-normal it is when I told Alex about it. And I don’t think Jordan ever expected for me to have this part of me. Idk if he even knew fully before he asked me out. So I hope it’s not some late coming baggage he has to deal with. But then again (think logically Georgia) he wouldn’t be putting all this effort in if it was an issue would he ? He clearly wants to help and be apart of it. So I shouldn’t stress. I’m lucky to have him. Even with all the meh of being ill today I’m still super happy and overall sitting around an 8-9. The only reason I’m not a 10 is because of the pain and fear of not having anything sexual happen for the rest of the day. But today has been super good. Having him round like this just makes me so excited for us to get our own place. I’ve already started saving and kept that money in an inaccessible account so I can’t touch it for 2 years. But it’s what I want and I’m happy I’ve started working for it. I’m probably gonna but half of my pay increase into it too when I start my new job. I wanna surprise him in a few months or a year and say “look what I’ve been doing for us”. Gets me all excited and giddy thinking bout it !!

[wooahaes]

I kept wanting to message you again and again but aaah life keeps taking over >_< Anyway, as you might have guessed: it's layton anon here Did you manage to do your discussion board post or are you still on it? Hope it goes well<3 My essay is... uhm... yeah let's just say I'm working on it haha

OMG THE HAND HOLDING THING Y/N AND CHAN ARE LITERAL OTTERS THAT'S SO CUTE T-T (also istg UtS gives me so much cuddle envy I too want to sleep in a comfy cuddle pile)

same with jakob as a unit, he's just not it. But his quotes are superbe~ also yess the short, sassy quotes are so good fjdhfjh

I think you're really writing cheol so well. You found a good way to describe the dynamics between the members in general, it feels very on point to me. Sometimes it's super tiny things that make me go "oh!! that's so like them!!"

........... why did you have to say that about cheol always being in love with reader in every route why must you break my heart in this way (but also him putting her happiness first is so hfjshckejjhfj-- i' m fI nE)

reminds me i have to catch up with vernon and seungkwan's parts I'm so excited to read them!! I'll let you know when I did hehe~ Also I really get what you said about 10 wreckers at all times like. same. I'd say my biases are cheol and hao (tho chan has been dangerously close to join their circle one too many times hdjhfdj) but I literally love all of them sm T-T

i hope you're doing okay and are taking care of yourself! ily<3

hiii lovely <3 i hope things are going well for you tho!! sometimes life gets busy! no biggie, take care of urself <3 ur wellbeing comes first! also yeah ive got discussion board posts done hehe i have a paper due sunday but i think i'm gonna start working on it tomorrow unless we get confirmation that game nights gonna be tomorrow? good luck on the essay tho!!

god... mood tho i ALSO want a cuddle pile with ppl i love and trust. but yeah they're otters <3 he literally holds yn's hand all the time like. bestie just wants to hold a hand!! its for the comfort <3

i talked abt this with a friend btw abt jakob and felicia i think is who u get if u play as a guy? i never understood that. like im guessing its for romance stuff but if you can/will get both anyway??? why not give the player someone they'd realistically have as a butler/maid to watch after them???

aaa thank u!! the tiny things might literally just be me pulling from actual things they've said/done hehe but im glad i can capture things well!! i usually second guess myself sometimes but its reassuring to hear things like this :3 i love writing cheol tho. if i dont get whiny cheol in UtS at least somewhere tho i s2g ill delete /j

this only makes it worse but cheol is Not the only one who is always in love w reader in every route <3 like there's always at least two ppl who are in love w reader in every single route (cheol being one), maybe three. its all a matter of them all wanting to see yn happy instead of keeping them for themself <3

aaa thank u ill look forward to hearing ur thoughts then!! sorry in advance for seungkwan and all the fighting his has /j

i have started appreciating cheol a Lot more over this past year tbh? like i only got into svt last october-ish (whenever attacca dropped, i dont remember right offhand) and he wasnt rly high on my list. i just appreciate him and all he does for the group while also being like... the POUTIEST man sometimes. seungkwan doesnt say he loves him back and cheol is just like >:( carats would never treat me like this smh. get u a man who can do both.

hao truly is an artist and i can deeply appreciate that aspect of him even if he's not like. high on my list? like i love svt as a whole but i full yknow tht i love other members more (even if they arent my biases). i think i really appreciate how much of himself hao puts into what he does. he's so passionate about what he does. also hai cheng made me cry so ill never forgive him for tht /hj

(no but rly i did break down crying the first & only time i listened/watched the mv and i cannot bring myself to listen again bc i think i'll cry again if i do. beautiful song tho, i just do not want to cry lmao)

im doing fine! i had an eye appointment yesterday and had my eyes dilated so that was a bit of a pain to deal with, but im getting new glasses! my prescription has changed Slightly so thankfully no headaches or anything lol only thing fucking w me now is allergies since pollen is UP rn and i hate it </3 summer class is almost over tho!! im going to enjoy my less than a month of chilling lol i dont even have a proper final for this class, i just have to edit my papers and resubmit them <3

i hope you're doing well, though! take care of yourself <3 get ur essay done when u can!! i believe in u <3 its always lovely to hear from you!!

[meg2md]

Residency has been.... a rough start. Take starting on an off-service rotation, add living alone when your co-residents all have partners, and then the cherry on top.... GETTING COVID. Man. I'm so lonely. And de-conditioned. The light at the end of the tunnel is that I start labor and delivery next, although I have my first call shift before I start, so that will probably be.... a disaster/huge whopping learning experience.

COVID seriously f'd up my mental health. The flare in my depression has been UNREAL. Luckily my program has resources so I'm getting set up with a therapist, which is something I need to do today.

In the meantime I'm finishing up the OBGYN Intern Challenge from CREOGs Over Coffee to help me feel productive. As much as I in theory love sitting around reading and playing video games, it's hard to see all my friends being DOCTORS while I'm sitting on my ass at home alone, hahaha. Also, again, not even being on an OBGYN rotation and getting to do births and scopes and surgeries... it's so sad. But I'm finally getting over the anhedonia hump, so yeah, listening to CREOGs Over Coffee and doing 10 push-ups and 10 squats per episode finished to try and get my dilapidated body back into some semblance of shape (I am seriously SO out-of-breath just walking up my stairs, omg). And I was in decent shape before!!!

I worked on some one-handed knot tying last night, so that was good. I'll practice some more today, get set up with therapy, and make the million phone calls I've been putting off because I've been in a toxic cesspool of COVID-exacerbated mental illness. Lmao. I feel like a plague child. I finally go back to work tomorrow but I feel like I'm going to be testing aggressively positive for the rest of my life and no one's gonna want to spend time around me.

All in all, I'm happy with where I am, the start has just been hard. It truly can only go up from here though, so there's that??