#or more accurately not in the way they want her to be redeemed

[duke-daemon]

hazbin hotel redesigns wooooooooo

okay so. i'm gonna discuss my thoughts about them n shit, putting under a readmore bc it's gonna get long and rambley. sorry in advance for the shit formatting, i'm on mobile </3

just some general shit about how i would rewrite it. i think the premise of redeeming sinners is entertaining but is executed horribly. i also am a fan of the "heaven isn't great either" idea but again, executed horribly. i'd make the hierarchy of angels more accurate because it's cool as hell and i have autism about it. the characters from hell would swear still (albeit not as much), but the angels would outright refuse to swear or make vulgar jokes ever. this would be partially to further the gap between heaven and hell and make the differences more stark.

hell would also be more like dante's inferno (again because i think its cool). the ars goetia would get a full redesign and would be more prevalent in demonic society.

now for the characters!

---

VAGGIE VALTIEL:

starting off with vaggie, or Valtiel as i've renamed her because let's be honest her original name sucks. Valtiel (Val for short) was an aspiring power angel who wanted to be an exorcist. she looked up to lute and thought the idea of killing demons was really cool and badass. however when she actually was on the field for the first time she discovered how awful this actually was. she tried to help a few demons but lute figured it out and felled her right then and there. the rest of her story is relatively the same. personality wise she's more stoic and less prone to all-out aggression. she still get angry, sure, but it's in a quieter and more menacing way. you DO NOT want to fuck with Valtiel.

CHARLIE:

next up is charlie! i had two ideas for her. the first one (unsettling drawing) has her as a mannequin/doll type demon. lucifer and/or lilith was unable to conceive and as such they built a kid from scratch. she's overall similar to og charlie personality wise, very kind and cheerful despite her unsettling appearance. she struggles with empathy sometimes but really does mean well. her motive for rehabilitating sinners is so they get to see their family again. being able to see heaven from where they are in hell must make them sad, so she wants to help make them happy again!

the second idea for charlie has her as an angel. specifically i casted her as a dominion angel due to their reputation as holy judges. she was once a demon but has been rehabilitated and has risen into angelhood! she now wants to help her former kin do the same and redeem themselves in heaven's gaze. again, similar cheery personality, but a bit more prudish in this rendition

tangent time!

as a side tangent, valtiel and charlie would have a different relationship in this rewrite. their relationship felt shoehorned in in the original show, like it was just there for the hell of it. we didn't see much development between them and it just felt kinda bland. so in my rewrite, charlie and valtiel are amiable exes. they tried dating when valtiel first fell (when charlie was still a demon in the charlie-angel version) but realized their feelings for each other were much more platonic than romantic. they ended things off on good terms, deciding they were much better as friends. they are still besties to this day! later charlie ends up with emily (or 'ellie' as i plan to rename her)

back to the characters

Alastor:

note: i made alastor mixed-race, which could be seen as bad by some due to vivzie saying he's black. however, as many have pointed out, he has no ethnic features whatsoever and i honestly wouldn't be surprised if she said that just to get away with using voodoo symbols (a closed religion) in his imagery/design. like viv, i am incredibly white and have little to no knowledge of voodoo, and even if i did i would not use it for something like this anyways due to the stigma the religion already has and (again) it being a closed practice. as such i removed it from his concept altogether, but made him mixed race (white passing) because.. why not i guess, i forgor my actual reasoning

with that being said...

alastor is by far my favorite of the redesigns and i'm honestly tempted to turn him into a legally distinct oc. i imagine he's somewhat reserved, along the lines of norman bates albeit a bit more extroverted. during his life he was a serial killer with a day job as a radio announcer. he took pleasure in reporting about his own murders on the radio, but that is eventually what got him caught (ie accidentally letting slip info that wasn't released to the public). as a result he was sentenced to death. upon arriving in hell, he quickly rose through the ranks to borderline overlord status and is a feared presence by demons and sinners alike. why is he bothering to assist in the hotel project? who knows... his motives are a mystery, like the rest of what he does

(he isn't actually alastair crowley i just thought the naming convention was ironic. however he may have also dabbled with satanic magic in lifetime..)

Angel Dust:

TW: brief discussion of SA

this is definitely my second favorite redesign. i loooove insect themes and wanted to do more than just Extra Arms, so he now has fucked up legs and a lot of eyes too! story-wise, angel used to be a criminal mastermind, hated by both the mafia and the feds. he was a gentleman thief, arranging massive heists under the cover of night while also partaking in the occasional drag show. he ended up a cocaine addict later in life, which caused his work to become sloppier. eventually he was killed in a heist gone wrong, specifically shot by the police.

i'm not gonna go too in-depth on the SA part of his story, but he is hypersexual due to being assaulted in both his life and afterlife. it would be something he'd be working on in the rewrite. his reason for coming to the hotel in the first place may have even been for help with this trauma. underneath his sultry exterior is a broken guy who really just needs someone to care about him for who he really is and not for what his body can do.

LUTE:

so lute and adam are some of the characters i have the most gripes about. the biggest one being why viv chose adam as the leader of the exorcists in the first place. if she wants a biblical figure tied to demon killing, Archangel Michael is RIGHT THERE, aka the one destined to kill satan during the events of Revelations. if she wants the first human to die, that would be Abel, not Adam. and i kinda doubt abel would want to do the stuff that HH!adam has been doing. if she wants an angel related to torture, Dumah is her guy! an angel that rules over wicked souls and tortures sinners every day except sabbath. so many better options...

with that out of the way, Lute is still the lieutenant of the exorcist, who are a specially chosen group of powers sent to purge hell once a year. think navy seals. she's pretty much the same as in the show, albeit more muscular and visually different from other exorcists (seriously why do they all look exactly the same?????) she's a very repressed lesbian who hasn't had time to work on that due to her duties

i also redesigned the exorcist uniform/armor because those LED purge masks are fugly as hell and their clothes don't even look remotely like armor.

Adam + Final Thoughts

i did start a redesign of adam but got bored of it. regardless, i think he'd be the head of C.H.E.R.U.B. instead of the exorcists. he doesn't want his children to make the same mistakes he and eve did, so together they started C.H.E.R.U.B. to help lost souls stay out of hell

final thoughts uhhhh i'm tired. show sucks, it had so much potential but viv ruined it by being a shitty writer and an even shittier person. the designs are fine i guess but they all look exactly the same and are in desperate need of variety. the humor is dogshit, saying dick and balls and penis over and over and over again doesn't make it any funnier than the first three times you made that joke. anyways that's it, i hope you liked my inane ramblings. gonna go vanish for another forty years or so, adios

[toasterslime]

I have so many thoughts about Jon and Daisy’s s4 relationship. I know the fandom is very “look guys they’re besties” or “Jon deserves better Daisy is horrid” and like honestly,,, I don’t think either of those things are accurate. I’m not trying to say them being friends is healthy or even plausible it’s just a really fucking interesting dynamic to look at.

You take a man who’s turning into a monster who NOBODY believes can be redeemed (like… outwardly. He doesn’t know Martin even still cares about him) and the literal embodiment of an irredeemable monster whose hunger for the hunt made up everything she was… and you put them together. Jon saved her life. Jon saved her life after she tried to kill him, after he could know things about her that would probably make most people want to vomit. Why? Because if there’s hope for her, maybe there’s hope for him. And he doesn’t see his life as worth anything any more. When he went into that coffin he didn’t know if he was going to come back out. And Daisy knows this. On some level, Daisy doesn’t believe she deserves this second chance either. That’s why she doesn’t give into the hunger like Jon does. Because she literally believes she deserves to starve. But she thinks Jon *can* be redeemed. She recognizes that she was wrong to treat him like a monster. The person who wanted so badly to kill him recognizes this. And tries in her own way to support him and cheer him up. I think about that sometimes and foam at the mouth.

[theminecraftbee]

so, first, accountability statement: I plan on trying to finish the “zedaph steals a baby” fic by the end of the month and god is that one-line summary no longer accurate but we’re sticking to it, said here publicly so now I have to do it. obviously I also have recursive exchange and the writing I have for hotguy comics zine, but I am not SUPER worried about either of those time/inspiration-wise at the moment and also for Reasons I know it won’t be long until I have more free writing time after that, SO.

various items that are on my potential writing docket, I am curious which of these appeal most:

I dust off the supervillain support group au. two ways this could go: I chip away at the second arc of my original outline and acknowledge this will be like a 300k fic I’m not ready to feel “done” with or “ready to post” with for ages, or I re-work it into something a little more doable and less ambitious keeping the same premise (ren runs a support group for supervillains, doc pov as he starts to heal and redeem himself). this MAY honestly be a target for “if I don’t hate the first 50k on re-reading it and I can actually make my brain write the second arc, do a slower release schedule and then start releasing chapters before I’m done writing”? but this ALSO runs the risk of “I stopped writing it, which is often a sign I was having trouble writing it”.

pearl monster au, which has been cooking in my head for a long while. the basic premise is “one day, pearl, with no memory of how or why this happened, wakes up in a facility as a monster and must try to figure out how she got there, escape, and find her way home, even knowing she may be irrevocably changed”. now with bonus season 10 fish flavor to add to this creature design I’ve been iterating on in my head for forever! this one is ALSO an experiment for me in “can I write a fic where I can’t write dialogue for basically the entire first act”, which would be interesting to see from me, you know?

the related “bigb folklore au”, where after secret life bigb is woken up by Cat and Dog by the tracks of the King Snake, which bigb can recognize as the railroad track, and decides to journey down the railroad to see if he can figure out what the fuck is going on. I need to do video review of life series bigb for this one. this is my excuse to get Weird and Metaphorical and also assign everyone to various animals for no reason, along with using some very specific aesthetic I have wanted to use for some worldbuilding but hadn’t gotten around to yet in any of my stuff. man walks through the desert with animal, confronts train that might be the watchers, might be death, and might just be a train. also, realizes that “confront” is the operative word there and has to deal with that. you know how it is.

““office au””, in air quotes because it’s not REALLY what anyone going to an office au is looking for so much as an excuse to write weird horror. iskall, normal-ish software developer man in a boring office job who does game jams in his free time, goes to work one day to work in his boring downtown office on a payment system for a client. and then things, uh, Take A Turn. this would be a LITTLE me going “what if I wrote an au with a guy who works in tech but like, the boring side of tech I’m in. like, banks and consulting and manufacturing and shit. where you sit in meetings all day and tweak java 8 code even though that language is ten years out of date. but THEN. something exciting happens in the worst way possible.” I’m doing to iskall what I did to mumbo stuffed bird is what I’m saying. it’d be fun.

DO ANY OF THESE PARTICULARLY INTEREST ANYONE. your input will be valued. like 50% chance i get hit with a strong bolt of inspiration then IGNORE that input but it’ll be valued all the same,

[catastrophichues]

smth that like. i end up thinking abt a lot is the way vil is a character whose in-game experiences are really mirrored by a big chunk of the way fandom treats him.

vils beauty is smth that he’s been villainized for his entire life. he’s too beautiful, too gorgeous, and in the minds of many, that automatically equates to things like “mean/evil/cruel.” as if his beauty = villain

and that perception is one he struggles with. no one lets him play the role of hero bc a lot of the time, a hero is someone the audience roots for and relates to. but no one can “relate” to vil bc his beauty others him. neige has a beauty that is innocent but also attainable. that’s what makes him the perfect hero. for some reason, it’s almost unfathomable to most that someone beautiful who also cares about being beautiful could be smth other than a “mean girl” or a villain.

and the thing is, vil does care abt beauty! and that’s okay! valuing beauty is not inherently evil, and the way fanon (and when I say fanon, i obviously don’t mean everyone, there’s also a lot of ppl who see vil and actually understand the complexities of his character) twists that to “forcing his standard upon others” is honestly wrong. vil holds himself to such a high standard, but the “standard” he’s holding others too is being the best versions of themselves they could be.

his correcting epel on language usage is literally not smth sinister or classist. the EN translation didnt get the translation accurate. correcting epel was literally abt being aware that not many would be able to understand epel if he continued to speak in that dialect, and in other cases, seen as rude. he was preparing epel for future opportunities and circumstances. epels grandma literally switches her way of speaking when meeting the boys at Harveston, so it’s not smth that’s got zero precedent.

and in cases where vil is believed to be envious of others beauty it’s like—who doesn’t feel jealous at times? he mentions being a little jealous that silver does nothing with his hair and yet it’s so fine. that’s understandable! vil is someone who puts work in his beauty. he doesn’t just coast on what’s already there he exercises. he cut out mayo even tho he loved it bc he ended up breaking out. he holds himself to strict food regimens. he makes beauty products. so like-this envy? it’s healthy, he expresses it, and then he gifts silver self-made hair and skin products. bc his envy doesn’t manifest as wanting others to be less than him. it manifests as appreciation and wanting to see improvement. bc!! he’s a good person!!

ive seen fics and content where it’s like “he values beauty/his figure over the lives of others.” my dudes. this man literally sacrificed his youth and beauty to save idia/close the underworld. “Oh but he regretted it! and he got it back!” yeah he cried his heart out who WOULDN’T! and as for getting it back—learning a lesson or making sacrifices shouldn’t always hinge on like whether or not the character makes these sacrifices continues to suffer or whatever. like redemption (even tho he rlly doesn’t need to be redeemed) doesn’t only become valid if someone suffers or if suffering is constant.

vil gets relegated to roles like “the bitchy ex” or the “mean girl” or someone who is constantly cruel and vain and a bully when that’s literally the antithesis of what vil is.

so for that, i really really appreciate the content creators who write fic or make art where vil as a character is more than the villain he tries so hard not to be.

[cryptidghostgirl]

Hello hi- back to my shenanigans again (the one with the fake dating + lobby portal + frozen half the pentagram surely not an OC ahahah anonymous asker) - anyway- heres some MORE angst.

Reader's past lover- died waaay before reader back in their teens because readers mother found out about their not so heterosexual relationship and decided to shoot them both but only killed one- reader escaping and killing her mom in return (let’s name her Charlotte- with mane wolf features- so wolf+fox+deer features a combination! ) and barely moved on after meeting Alastor like years later, yet still haunted by Charlottes dead eyes reader saw when she woke up from some sleepy poison. Now Charlotte is in heaven and reader in hell alongside their radio-lover lover!

Yet somehow- maybe though a very uncanonical accurate meeting where angels go down to see the new hotel after hearing sinners can get redeemed Charlotte (not to be confused with Charlie) is one of said angels and suddenly all those waves of emotions come rushing back and reader can do nothing but stare.

but oh wait! Angels/Winner dont remember their past life so reader goes to her- and shes just “Oh hello! Whats your name? :3” (shes an angel and loves the stars and plants and everything nice can do no wrong) “I-… I guess you dont know me in this lifetime” (AND DOESNT TELL HER THEYVE MET BEFORE because what good would that bring?)

But alastor is also there lurking in the back. watching them- he knew someone was in readers life before him but reader never said more than that. Will readers feelings for Charlotte come back? Will reader stay to the infatuation of murderous acts that Alastor bought them? Will reader choose the pure love that might not spring again?

The infamous blizzard demon overlord! that never dropped their mask around others that always seemed to have the upper hand in any situation, the cold- charismatic- brutal and ruthless overlord- suddenly speechless at the reappearance of someone they used to know. How will everyone react?! “Sweet as a pea, but sharp as a knife- now shocked like the stars have fallen”

GAAAH MY BRAIN IS TOO BIG ANF FULL OF ANGST!!!!! Heres some kisses too: maybe next fic its me x you pookie 😘😘🥰🥰😘😘😘😘

A/N What a wild way to close off a request, I honestly got so much respect for that. I don't do OCs but for the sign off comment, I'll make an exception. Also I am assuming you want this as a part two to Frostbite because she's still a blizzard demon?? Apologies in advance if I got that wrong. Also,, not you quoting something else I've written in your request. That's crazy, thank you so much for the love.

Day Lilies (Alastor x Blizzard demon!Reader x Angel!OC)

Pairing: Alastor x Reader

Part One: Frostbite (Alastor x Reader)

Warnings: Homophobia (from other people and internalized) and murder. Smoking/cigarettes and angst. Always angst. I think that is it, please correct me if I am wrong.

Word Count: 2,969

Master Lists:

Master Lists 

Hazbin Hotel Master List 

Alastor Master List

Click here and leave a comment if you want to be added to any taglists or send me an ask about it.

The best thing about the Hazbin Hotel, according to some, was the fact that not one but two overlords who had found a home there. The Radio Demon and the Frost. Feared, revered, respected, and making an appearance for the first time in seven long years.

Without Alastor and Y/n's help, Charlie would not have been able to achieve all she had and she was eternally grateful to the pair, even if they were a tad confrontational and violent at times. Deeply in love, indebted to one another in a billion and five different ways, Alastor and Y/n had worked hard for their life in the underworld. As the angel stepped gently out of the portal, following her superior, Y/n felt the pressure of that life as it began to crash down around her.

When Charlie had struck the deal with Heaven to have an angel come down to the hotel to track its progress and assess if any of its inhabitants were worthy of redemption, Y/n had thought nothing of it. Sure, it was a bit irritating but if anything, the deal seemed ripe for entertainment and thats really all she and Alastor were after at the end of the day. She had figured the angel would be some low ranking nobody. She had thought it would be amusing, that they would torture the poor creature, that things would stay roughly the same. Never in her wildest dreams had the notion ever crossed Y/n's mind that the angel might be Charlotte.

Of course, Y/n had known Charlotte must be in Heaven. The girl had always been so kind, so good to her very core. It had just all seemed so far away and now, somehow, there she was, peeking timidly out from behind the seraphim's back.

Charlotte looked different, having taken on some animalistic, wolfish features since her death. Sharp ears sprouted from the untamed mess of her hair, fangs peeked their way out from the corners of her lips but Y/n was sure. It was Charlotte. It was all in the eyes.

"Welcome, Sera." Charlie politely began, taking a step forward.

Normally, such a show of self restraint from the young demon princess would have caused curiosity to spark a fire in Y/n's chest. Now, she just stood beside Angel as Charlie had requested, eyes wide and mind reeling.

"Is this who we will be working with?"

Sera looked at the shy wolf of a girl behind her and nodded her head, gesturing for the girl to step forward.

"Yes." she replied, her voice cold and haughty, "This is Charlotte, she has been with us for a while and we trust her judgment on matters such as this."

"Oh how funny!" Charlie brightly exclaimed, "My full name is Charlotte too but, I go by Charlie. Do you have a nickname you'd prefer?"

"Just Charlotte is fine." the angel softly replied and Y/n's breath caught in her throat.

The girls voice was honeysuckle, it was sticky sweet teen love.

"Why her?" Husk asked and Charlie shot him a glare, "She just seems a little..."

Sera laughed lightly, a caring smile sneaking on to her face.

"She's a little shy, but she is smart. Even when she was alive, she had an ability to read people, to see right through to the essence of their beings."

Charlotte blushed slightly at the compliment, turning away.

The southern sun beat down over head, long grass whipping at their legs as Charlotte, running, dragged Y/n to the center of the field.

"Lottie!" Y/n exclaimed, half laughing, "Where on earth are you taking me?"

Charlotte glanced back at her companion, a mischievous smirk painting her lips that sent bolts of red hot fire through to Y/n's fingertips.

"You'll see."

After a few more paces, they came to a panting halt. Charlotte turned to Y/n, placing a hand gently over the other girl's eyes. With a guiding hand, she lead the blinded girl to a spot a little ways off where she had snuck off to earlier and set up a picnic. There was fresh fruit, Georgia peaches from her family's own orchard, and home made lemonade. Slowly, Charlotte gifted Y/n with sight.

Y/n's mouth fell slightly open as she surveyed the scene before her. Sixteen and in love, she turned to Charlotte, taking both the girl's hands in her own.

"When... how..."

"I know things have been rough at home lately. I wanted to do something to make you smile."

"How did you know? I never..." Y/n cleared her throat, "I never said anything... I nev-"

"You didn't have to. I know you, love. You never have to say a word."

Alastor watched his lover silently from the other side of the group. Charlie had insisted they flank the guests, dragging Y/n away from his side just as the portal had opened. She didn't show it, not obviously, but he knew something was wrong. From the second the portal had opened and the angels had stepped through, she had gone tense, her eyes fixed on the one called Charlotte, the tips of her frostbite blackened fingers tapped against one another in wild thought.

"Well," Sera sighed, looking around at the ragtag group of sinners and demons, "I had best be on my way. I will be back in a few days to pick Charlotte up, please be kind to her over the course of her stay."

With those parting words and a reassuring pat on the angel's shoulder, Sera stepped back through the portal which closed behind her.

"Well," Charlie began brightly, clapping her hands together, "let's do introductions! I am Charlie Morningstar and I run the Hazbin Hotel with my girlfriend, Vaggie."

Vaggie sent Charlotte a wave which she timidly returned. With a deep breath, Charlotte stepped towards the line of sinners before her.

"Alastor." Alastor hummed, grabbing Charlottes hand and shaking it harshly, "A pleasure to be meeting you my dear, quite the pleasure."

It struck Charlie as a bit odd he said and did nothing else but, she made no mention of it. In her mind, Alastor was simply on his best behavior as requested. In reality, he was far too focused on the way a slight flurry of snow had begun to settle on Y/n's sharp shoulders.

"Nice to meet you too." Charlotte replied, extracting her hand from his grip and moving down the line.

Y/n's heart pounded wildly against her chest as Charlotte grew closer. Her tail twitched behind her, flicking back and forth gently, and her breaths grew slightly heavy. Although he noticed the odd behavior, it was impossible not to from his place beside her, Angel said nothing. At long last, Charlotte came to a stop before her.

"Disgusting!" Y/n's mother's voice rang out through the yard, "You are both complete and utter disgraces!"

They hadn't meant to be found out. As far as Y/n's mother had known, Y/n and Charlotte were best friends. Charlotte had come over to help Y/n with her chores, they had been doing laundry out in the yard when Charlotte had playfully flicked water towards her beloved. One thing had lead to another and before long, they had been wrapped up in one another, planting a singular, soft kiss on each other's lips. Y/n felt Charlotte's hand tighten around her own, she took a step forward.

"Don't you dare speak to her that way!" Y/n yelled back, anger burning brightly in her eyes and adrenaline shaking her limbs with wild courage, "Don't you dare!"

Her mother scoffed, crossing her arms over her chest.

"She is a bad influence on you! The devil sent to curse me!"

Y/n's mother stepped forward, grabbing Y/n and wrenching her from Charlotte's grip. Charlotte tugged at Y/n's mother's dress as she dragged her girlfriend harshly into the small house.

"Let her go!" Charlotte cried, "Stop it! We weren't doing anything wrong!"

With a harsh slap to her face, Charlotte was sent to the ground. Her mother threw Y/n through the door, the unfinished wood of the floor sending splinters deep into Y/n's knees as she struggled to get to her feet. Her head had hit the corner of the table in her fall, the world was spinning. Y/n's mother grabbed the shot gun from where it lay beside the door. Just as Y/n managed to stumble to her feet, holding her swaying body up with a hand on the table she had hit, her mother stepped outside and slammed the door behind her, locking it.

Y/n rushed over, trying desperately to wrench it open to no avail. The anger had turned to panic as she heard her mother cock the gun.

"What are you doing!" she heard Charlotte yell and Y/n rushed to the window.

From her vantage point, Y/n watched her mother train the gun on Charlotte who had her hands raised and was stumbling backwards.

"Run!" she yelled, banging her fists on the glass, "Lottie, run!"

"Please." Charlotte was pleading, tears wetting her cheeks, "I promise I wont ever come here again, I wont ever come near her again. Please!"

"Lottie!" Y/n yelled again.

With no regard for her own safety, Y/n punched the glass of the window. The pane shattered around her hand, puncturing her soft skin. Blood, hot and wet, ran down her arm as she pulled her hand back to her side.

"Yeah, you sure as hell wont!" Y/n's mother yelled, her voice thick and low with rage, "You'll be dead!"

Y/n flung her leg over the window sill, shards of glass digging into her as she pulled herself through the hole she had created.

"Lottie!" she yelled again, "Run!"

Her screams were drowned out by the sound of a gunshot. Charlotte held her hands to her stomach, blood pouring from between her fingers. Their eyes met.

"Lottie!"

"And you are?" Charlotte asked expectently.

Y/n shook her head slightly, pulling herself from the depths of her memories. Everyone was staring at her, she had no idea how long the angel had been standing before her. She cleared her throat.

Alastor didn't know what was going on but, whatever it was, he knew he didn't like it. Using his shadows, he appeared behind Y/n and placed a protective hand on the top of her head between her horns. Her hair was damp from freshly fallen snow and Charlotte gasped slightly in surprise at his appearance.

"My dear," he grinned, leaning down to Y/n's ear, "you're snowing."

"I..."

Y/n looked up, her cheeks flushing pink and the heart on the tip of her tail puffing up as she realized what he said.

"O-oh." she stuttered, brushing his hand from her head and the snow from her shoulders as she regained control of her powers again, "I'm sorry, I don't know what came over me."

The other members of the hotel watched in a mixture of shock and confusion. They had always known Y/n to be cold, to be harsh. They had always seen her devotion to the man behind her as infallible. No one had any idea what was going on but, the presence of the angel stopped them all in their tracks.

"It's quite all right, what's your name?" Charlotte asked again, her voice honey sweet.

Y/n took a deep breath, morphing her features into the closest thing to a kind smile she could muster.

"Y/n." she firmly replied, "I'm Y/n."

Her eyes scanned Charlotte's face intently as their hands made contact. She waited for the shock of recognition, for the tears her Lottie had always been so prone to. There was nothing.

"That's a very pretty name." Charlotte replied, "It sounds like it is from the same era as mine."

That raised some small hope in Y/n's chest. She took a step forward, bringing herself closer to the angel.

"Which is?"

"Oh, I don't know." Charlotte replied, her cheeks flushing pink with embarrassment, "Angels don't get to remember their lives on earth unless they are pretty high in the ranks. I've been told I was from Georgia though, that I died in the early 1900s."

Y/n froze, her breath trapped in her chest, a knife buried deep within her heart.

"Oh." she mumbled out in a broken whisper, "I guess you... you don't know me in this lifetime."

"What was that?" Charlotte asked, leaning in a bit.

Y/n shook her head, letting go of Charlotte's hand.

"Nothing. I... I need some fresh air, I think. If you would all excuse me."

It didn't take Alastor long to find Y/n once Charlie had let him return to his duties in favor of showing Charlotte around the hotel. She stood out in back of the hotel, her back pressed firmly against the wall and a cigarette crushed between her fingers. Shakily, she took a drag.

"What was that about?" Alastor asked, leaning up against the wall beside her and folding his arms across his chest.

"What was what about." Y/n cooly replied.

"Y/n, don't play dumb."

"I knew her back when we were alive, thats all."

"Is that all?" Alastor asked after a moment, "You seemed..."

He trailed off. Alastor was angry. He had always been the jealous type, protective to a fault. He could see how shaken up Y/n was however and so, running a finger over the ring he wore, Alastor took a deep breath.

"That angel, Charlotte..." her name lingered poisonously on his tongue, "it seemed there was something a lot more than just you knowing her."

"I picked these for you." Y/n bashfully stated, shoving a bouquet tied with a rough bit of twine towards the pretty girl beside her, "Here."

Tentatively, Charlotte took the bouquet from Y/n's hand. She held it gently, watching the way the breeze played with the petals.

"Georgia asters?" Charlotte hummed thoughtfully, "And yarrow?"

"My momma didn't used to be poor. She grew up in a rich family, gave it up when she married my dad. Her momma taught her floriography." Y/n's words came out in a big rush, they chased after one another in a breathless flurry of nerves, "It was big in the victorian era for fancy people, all about talking through flowers. She taught me asters symbolized wisdom, faith, and valor and that yarrow was for healing and... and love... besides, I know you like them. You're always staring at them when were out."

Charlotte looked over at Y/n who's cheeks were bright red. She smiled, her eyes shining.

"I love you too." she said, nudging Y/n gently with her elbow.

"Yeah, but..." Y/n sighed, running a hand through her messy hair, "I... god, Lottie! I don't just love you like a sister. Its... I understand if you don't wanna talk to me anymore I just couldn't... I couldn't keep it in anymore."

Y/n looked away, tears pressing hotly at the backs of her eyes. Charlotte's eyes went wide.

"I understand... I won't be mad... I just... I'll leave."

Charlotte's hand shot out, grabbing Y/n's wrist as she pushed herself from the fence they were leaning against. Slowly, Y/n turned to face her. Charlotte was blushing now too and looked away, still holding Y/n tightly.

"I don't..." she took a deep breath, "I don't love you like a sister either."

"It's wrong... it's so wrong... what would my mother say... what would your mother say, I-"

Charlotte cut Y/n off, standing on her toes to press a soft kiss to the slightly taller girl's lips. It was clumsy and foreign. Y/n trembled, her eyes fluttered shut.

"I don't care." Charlotte said, "I don't care."

"Yeah." Y/n sighed, taking a final drag from her cigarette before stamping it out beneath her heel, "Yeah."

"Do I have anything to worry about?" Alastor asked and Y/n's eyes met his.

He had known her long enough, he could see the conflict.

"She was my first love, Al." Y/n admitted, "We were girls together."

"You're my wife."

"It's different."

"Do I have anything to worry about?" Alastor asked again and Y/n looked back out at the sky.

"She doesn't remember me."

"But you remember her."

"But I remember her." Y/n confirmed, her voice cracking, "I couldn't forget if I tried. She haunts me, Al. She has always haunted me, since long before I even met you. Lottie died in my arms, Al. My mother killed her, shot her right in the stomach. I...."

Y/n trailed off into silence. It was more about her life before she had met him than she had ever revealed before. Alastor took a deep breath, conflicting emotions battling behind his eyes.

"What are you thinking about?"

He was trying to keep his cool, to save face. He was failing, anger and a secret fear ate away at the edges of his words.

"Day lilies."

"Day lilies?" Alastor repeated and Y/n nodded, meeting his eyes once again.

"A floriography thing again?"

Alastor knew of Y/n's interest in the symbolic properties of plants. It was one of the only things she ever spoke about concerning her mother and her shadowed past before that night in Mimzy's bar.

"Yes."

"What do they mean?" Alastor sighed, resigning himself to his fate because god, if Alastor knew anything he knew his fate was Y/n. She held his heart in the palms of her hands.

"Love for lovers. Love for mothers..."

"And?"

His heart pounded against his chest.

"And loss of memory."

----

TAGS:

the ones in red are ones I am not sure worked/having trouble linking.

@willowshadenox @i-love-jafar @elfyeet @reader3 @lazygirlfanfic0-0@kahlan170@wendyphan01203-blog @fairyv-ice @clarakainda @lunaramune @mcueveryday @luxky-aish @peterpankat @corvid007

[ilovemybishies87]

The Vacation from Hell - Chapter One

Inspired by @damntheyare's amazing fanart. I did end up changing a couple elements because I suck and did not realize who the cat and dog were supposed to be until after I had completed the chapter. Sorry, KeeKee and Razzle/Dazzle!

This will also be posted to AO3, along with all future chapters, once I have an account. Until then, enjoy!

*EDIT* Now posted to AO3!

Alastor wasn’t sure how he found himself in this situation. No, that wasn’t quite accurate. He had some semblance of an idea. The Princess of Hell was known for her harebrained projects, but none more harebrained than a hotel with the sole purpose of redeeming the lowliest of Hell’s sinners. It was ridiculous. Laughable!  

But between the song she had belted out to the idea itself, he considered himself sold. Of course, she had no experience running a hotel. That wasn’t so much a flaw as it was a feature. He could only imagine relishing her failure once the futility of her goal dawned on her. Until then he would bide his time in the shadows—a most fitting place, if he said so himself!—playing his self-assigned role as co-manager. 

There was only one, tiny problem: he had seriously underestimated how much the universe wanted to fuck him over. 

______________________________  

“I need to visit a hotel!” Charlie announced. 

The ragtag band of guests and staff were lounging in the common room a few days after Sir Pentious’s pitiful attack on the hotel. All except Niffty, who had made it her mission to clean the place from top to bottom. Vaggie and Angel Dust sat next to each other on the sofa, scrolling their phones. Husk stood behind the counter at the bar, finishing his inventory of liquors for the night.  

Alastor turned to Charlie standing on the opposite side of the room. Papers plastered the wall behind her, filled with all the ideas she hadn’t yet written off as futile. She seemed frozen in place while she waited for a response. 

Eventually Angel Dust pulled his gaze from his phone long enough to give her a brief glance and laughed. “You live in a hotel!” A pair of arms made a sweeping motion around them, emphasizing his point. “Why do you need to visit one?” 

Charlie shook her head. “I know that, Angel! I meant a thriving one!” she said, and her grin stretched wide. “One on Earth!” 

Alastor raised a brow at her declaration. This time her statement did not go unnoticed. Vaggie’s eyes widened to the size of saucers. Angel Dust’s phone dropped onto his lap as he stared at her, incredulous. Even Husk stopped in the middle of his count, ears turned in the group’s direction.   

“Hon,” said Vaggie, once the initial shock had worn off, “that sounds—” 

“Like the best idea ever? I know!” 

“Not what I was going to say,” Angel Dust muttered. He picked up his phone and started scrolling again. 

“Just consider it field research!” said Charlie as she crossed the room, hardly able to contain her excitement. “Only for a couple of days, of course. I can’t leave the hotel vacant for long, in case a guest decides to check in.” 

“But there are too many unknowns!” Vaggie said, throwing her hands in the air. “Have you ever been to Earth before? People don’t exactly look like they do here.” 

“I could wear a disguise!” 

Vaggie slapped a hand over her face. “Do you even know how to get there?” 

“Not exactly,” Charlie said after a moment, deflated. “But surely someone knows the way!” 

Alastor took the opportunity and made his way over to them. “Naturally!” His microphone materialized in his hand. “You needn’t worry about the where or the how, my dear. Nothing my magic can’t handle, not at all! I can get us there and back in a jiffy!” 

Charlie stared up at him, hands clasped together. Her eyes practically shone. “Really?” 

“Well,” he added, side eyeing Vaggie with a smirk, “maybe not all of us.” 

Vaggie put her arm between him and Charlie, shielding her from the Radio Demon. “No way! Even if I thought you knew how to get there—which I don’t—”  

“Well, I do.” 

“And you do your little voodoo, so you guys blend in—” 

“Not voodoo,” stated Alastor. 

Vaggie ignored him. “I would never trust you alone with Charlie!” 

Charlie looked between her and Alastor. “Vaggie, I don’t want to go without you either! But,” she said sheepishly, “he sort of has a point?” 

“Excuse me?!” Vaggie took a step back, eyebrows furrowed. 

“I'm just saying,” Charlie continued, wringing her hands, “I’m not thrilled leaving the hotel alone. But if someone stayed here . . . well, there’s no one I trust more than you.”   

Vaggie sighed. “I appreciate it,” she said. “I really do! Still, I don’t trust him.” She glared at Alastor’s grinning face. “What’s the catch? You trying to use this to get Charlie to make a deal? I won’t let that happen!” 

He couldn’t fault her for jumping to that conclusion. The thought certainly crossed his mind, albeit briefly. But the rewards far outweighed any inconveniences. A simple glamour would solve their . . . unconventional appearances. And while he didn’t particularly desire returning to Earth, the trip would be worth the despair the princess would face once she realized how much of a farce her little Hazbin Hotel truly was. 

“Shame,” Alastor said, and flicked his claws. “But perish the thought! Consider this a sub-clause to our original agreement.” 

“But why?” Vaggie demanded. “What’s in it for you?” 

“You remember—” 

She groaned. “Ugh . . .” 

“The entertainment!” they said in unison, Vaggie less enthusiastically. 

“Come on, Vaggie,” said Charlie. She placed her hands on the other woman’s shoulders. “We won’t be gone long. This trip is what the hotel needs for inspiration!” 

“I don’t know. You really think you’ll be fine?” Vaggie glanced at Alastor. “Alone. With him.” 

Charlie bit her lip. “It’s fine. Although,” she continued, hesitant, “I would feel a bit more comfortable with added company.” 

“Tsk! Very well.” Normally Alastor wouldn’t cave to requests, but he would allow her this small victory. “If you must, we can take Niffty and Husk.” 

Husk turned to the trio from his spot at the bar. “Who the fuck said I wanted to go?” 

“A trip!” said Niffty, seeming to materialize from nowhere. “Will there be bad boys?” 

“What about Angel Dust?” asked Vaggie, and pointed to the Spider Demon who remained silent during their entire exchange. 

Angel Dust shrugged and got up from the sofa. He headed off to the staircase, calling back to the group, “Meh, no thanks. I did my time, thank you very much!” 

“Then it’s settled!” Alastor wrapped his arm around Charlie, causing her to nearly tumble into him, while pointing his microphone to Husk, then Niffty. “The four of us will go to Earth to do a little ‘field research,’ as it were, while you”—he pointed to Vaggie next, who pushed the mic away— “stay with the hotel." 

“I didn’t fucking agree to this!” said Husk, throwing his towel down.  

Niffty ran up the stairs behind Angel Dust, laughing maniacally all the way. “How many knives should I bring?” 

Vaggie put her head in her hands. “This is a bad idea. . .” 

“Ohh, I can’t believe this is happening!” Charlie said, bouncing up and down. She took a deep breath and closed her eyes. “Oh, there’s so much to plan! How do we make reservations? Where do we stay? What should I pack?” She turned to Alastor, suddenly serious. “Do I need to bring sunscreen?” 

Alastor chuckled at her enthusiasm. “I’ll let you worry about those last two, my dear. Leave the rest to me! Everything will be ready by tomorrow morning.” 

______________________________ 

The transportation spell took him all night to complete. There were slight alterations for the trip that made casting easier said than done. Part of the blame, in this regard, lay with him. Alastor knew that as time passed in Hell, so too had it passed on Earth. And he had no intentions of going to the Earth of the present.  

He allowed himself a small shudder as he finalized the last bit of magic. If he was expending his precious energy he would take them to some place—some time—more civilized, more familiar. Perhaps he was tempting fate returning to his old stomping grounds. And sure, a hotel from times past might not be the most effective for Charlie’s particular goal. But considering the circumstances, she had no right to complain. 

After a short breakfast the other five residents gathered back in the common room. Vaggie seemed more annoyed than usual, arms crossed over her chest as she stood by Angel Dust, sleep still in his eyes. Charlie had several bags by her side, including one oversized pink rolling suitcase. A smaller black suitcase was next to Niffty, which if Alastor had to guess was filled with various sharp instruments. Even Husk, despite his protests, had packed a worn leather bag that clinked when he placed it on the ground.  

Alastor brought nothing; it wasn’t as if he couldn’t simply conjure what he needed. He did, however, end up forgoing his usual red blazer and shirt ensemble. The pants remained the same, but he decided a thinner white button-down and red waistcoat would be more manageable. Ironically, not even Hell could compare to the omnipresent heat—and humidity, oh the humidity!—of New Orleans. 

“Did I pack enough?” Charlie asked, for once not in her usual attire. She donned a more casual pair of thin pink sweats, topped with a sweatshirt a few shades darker, decorated with hearts. She tugged on the bright orange and green purse strapped across her shoulder. “I feel like I’m forgetting something.” 

Angel Dust eyed the bags around them. “It’s, what, two days? This should be good.” 

“Six, actually,” said Alastor.  

"WHAT?!" Vaggie shrieked. 

He gave a noncommittal shrug. “With the energy I'll be using transporting all of us, and bags, not to mention the glamours—” 

“What does that have to do with anything?”  

“You can’t possibly expect me to use my valuable resources for a couple of days, my dear,” Alastor said, not to Vaggie, but to Charlie, who was currently taking inventory of what she packed. “That shouldn’t be a problem, right?  It’ll give you more time to get the full ‘human hotel’ experience.” 

“Umm,” Charlie said. “It’s not exactly what I had in mind, but you have a point. With six days I’m sure to get the full hotel experience, and then some! I did have a question, though.” 

“I have many questions,” Vaggie interrupted with a raised hand. 

Alastor shook his head. “Manners! Charlie was first.” 

“You mentioned glamours. I assume for you, me, Niffty and Husk,” said Charlie, not missing a beat. “How do they look? I mean, how are we going to blend in on Earth?” 

“Why don’t I show you instead?” 

Summoning his radio mic, Alastor pointed to the ground. Intricate symbols glowed beneath Charlie’s feet, the physical manifestation of the spell. A mirror sprouted from beneath the floor in front of her and a wave of green light washed over her form. 

“Charlie!” Vaggie reached out. She turned to Alastor and pulled out her spear, pointing it at his face. “What did you do to her, you piece of—!” 

Alastor rolled his eyes. “Oh, relax.” He pushed the weapon away as the light faded revealing Charlie, no worse for the wear. He turned to the blonde-haired demon. “See for yourself!” 

The glamour for her had been simple enough. Her skin, including her black-stained lips, shifted from a porcelain white to a more human peach tone. Unfortunately, her most standout feature, her rose-red eyes, turned an inconspicuous shade of brown.  

Pity. Red suited her so much better.  

Her attire remained unchanged. Something about altering her clothing felt wrong, almost too intimate. He figured they could attain more period appropriate clothing once they arrived. 

Charlie leaned in close to the mirror, taking in her new form. “No one will suspect a thing!” She glanced behind, where Alastor stood watching. “What about you?” 

The same symbols appeared beneath his feet. He had struggled somewhat with his own appearance. Unlike Charlie, who—despite being Hellborn—more-or-less resembled a human, his own demon form was anything but. The claws, the teeth, the deer-like ears: they all had to go.  

He went back and forth on how close his glamour should be to his former life. In the end he went the simple route and replicated how he looked while alive. Dark brown hair replaced his usual striking red and black strands, the style short and unremarkable. His eyes were the same dark shade as his hair, but he allowed himself a pair of red sunglasses in its place.  

“What do you think, my dear?” He bowed ever so slightly. “Convincing enough?” 

Charlie’s eyes widened, but it was difficult for him to decipher her expression. She met his eyes but averted her gaze just as fast. “Yes. Is that . . . how you were when you were human?”  

“Yes, indeedy! The clothes, not so much.” 

Angel whistled low. “Wow, the strawberry pimp is not so . . . strawberry.” 

Vaggie shook her head, unimpressed. “What about Niffty and Husk?” she asked. “How are you having them blend in?” 

“Oh, I’m sure they’ll approve the forms I’ve chosen,” said Alastor with a smirk. 

Niffty nodded so quickly she nearly lost her balance. “Whatever you choose!” 

Husk grumbled a response that no one, not even Alastor, could understand. 

“Well, we’ve wasted enough time already!” the Radio Demon replied. “We really should be on our way!” 

“Wait—!” said Vaggie. 

Alastor tapped the ground three times with the end of the microphone. Four scarlet circles, inscribed with intricate scripts, appeared beneath his and Charlie’s feet, as well as everyone’s baggage. The circles appeared under Niffty and Husk as well, along with the same lime symbols as the glamour.  

“Do take good care of the place while we’re gone, you two!” Alastor called out as he faded from sight. “It would be a pity if there was nothing for Charlie to return to.” 

“I didn’t volunteer for nothing!” exclaimed Angel Dust. 

"I have every faith in you, Vaggie!” Charlie said, her voice taking a far-off tone as she also disappeared. “We’ll be back before you know it!” 

Vaggie turned to Charlie. “Please, be careful up there! And, whatever you do, don’t—” She tried grabbing her hand but found nothing. Whatever warnings she intended to pass along were never heard.  

As quiet as a breath, the group had disappeared. 

______________________________ 

They were definitely in New Orleans. Tiny balconies overlooked the street from the second floors of the buildings surrounding them. His clothes clung to his skin, soaking in every drop of moisture it could hold. Alastor could even make out the smell of spices of Cajun cuisine from a restaurant nearby.  

But something was wrong. 

An oppressive buzz of electrical energy surrounded him, threatening to overwhelm his own magic. He wasn’t unfamiliar with the hum of static in the air—he had been a radio show host, after all, and quite adept with the technology of his time—but it was nothing like this. Smog, as thick as Hell’s and almost as noxious, spewed from automobiles unlike the ones he remembered. There were more of them too, almost as many vehicles as there were people.  

Something had gone horribly wrong. 

Space was simple enough to traverse. Moving from one physical point to another was as easy as a snap of his fingers. Or, in this case, a few taps of his mic. Time, on the other hand, was much trickier. It wasn’t linear like one would imagine, but almost a gordian knot, twisting and turning into itself, with present, future and past all jumbled together until it was hard to distinguish between the three. 

Alastor found Charlie a few paces away, no worse for wear. The bags were neatly by her side. “You all right, my dear?” 

“I should’ve asked what weather to dress for before I started packing,” she said, fanning herself. Even with the thin material, she was clearly regretting her choice of outfit. She might be accustomed to the heat of Hell, but the humidity was something else. “At least our luggage made it. But what about Husk and Niffty? I don’t see them anywhere!” 

“Meow!” 

They looked down. A black cat with rather unusual ears for the average feline glared at them, at him more specifically. 

“Why, Husk, my good fellow!” Alastor said, partly to distract himself from his growing headache. “Why the long face?” 

“Oh my!” exclaimed Charlie. She knelt to pick him up. To Alastor’s surprise, she did not end up getting scratched. “What happened to Husk?!” 

Alastor waved dismissively. “Not to worry! This is simply the result of his glamour.” 

“Yip!” 

A small black and tan mutt nosed his shoe, tail wagging so fast it might fly off. Feathered ears perked at the sound of his voice. Alastor’s grin widened as he scooped up the animal and held it under one arm.  

“I knew I could count on you to stay close by, Niffty.”  

“Niffty!?” Charlie bit her lip, but he could see the corners of her mouth turn up, as if torn between disbelief and excitement. “I mean, I guess this disguises them.” An alarmed look crossed her face. “They won’t stay this way permanently, right?” 

“Of course not, my dear! Probably.” 

“Al!” 

“The spell will revoke once we return to Hell, glamours and all,” said Alastor, rubbing his fingers to his temples.  

During their exchange he caught a glimpse of some passersby taking notice of their group. Under normal circumstances he wouldn’t mind putting them in their place, but right now he was not in the mood. Between the drain on his magic and the unpleasant realization of when he was, he wanted nothing more than privacy. 

“We probably should get to our hotel to check in.” 

With Niffty still under his arm, Alastor grabbed Husk’s bag and placed it on top of the black luggage. He also managed to situate the extra bags Charlie packed—why did she have to pack so much?—onto the larger suitcase she had dragged with her. He regretted his decision to turn the two into animals. An extra pair of hands would’ve been welcome.  

“Well, my dear, ready to go? I would offer a hand, but—” 

“Oh, no! Don’t worry about it! We have our hands full with these two.” Charlie juggled Husk awkwardly as she reached for her luggage. “Lead the way!” 

He took a deep breath, strengthening his resolve.  

“Hey, Alastor.”  

The Radio Demon looked back. His grin nearly slipped from his face; his throbbing head momentarily forgotten. She was clearly struggling, suitcase veering off course. Husk had clawed into her sweatshirt and climbed his way up to perch on her shoulder. And yet she smiled, a smile brighter than the sun beating down on them.  

The shades covering his eyes were not enough to protect him.  

“This is unbelievable,” said Charlie. “You’re amazing!” 

She could not know. She could never know. That the great Radio Demon had made an error of this magnitude, of this caliber. She had to believe this was all part of his plan, for this trip she desired, that he foolishly granted. 

Alastor gritted his teeth and forced his grin even wider. 

This was going to be Hell on Earth. 

[paperbag34]

Hazbin Hotel roleswap au concept? maybe?

Got bored, started thinking about "What if Alastor found Vaggie instead of Charlie", snowballed a little from there.

_______________________

Edit: an expansion: How Deals Work

_______________________

What's swapped in this AU:

For now, only Alastor and Charlie.

Alastor remains largely unchanged. He's still the Radio Demon, the terrifying overlord with a meteoric rise to prominence after killing multiple century-old overlords and broadcasting their screams, then disappeared after a fight with the TV Demon, Vox.

But, now after seven years of. well. Radio silence (lol). His radio has begun broadcasting once more. And unexpectedly, what the voice on the radio speaks of is not the brutal murder of Overlords, but instead, a pet project of his. The Hazbin Hotel, an establishment accepting all, and under his protection, with its insane goal of redeeming sinners.

No one really knows what made the Radio Demon take on such an impossible, foolish task, thuogh speculation is abound. Vox, in particular, likes to ridicule Alastor on his shows to the point where it's a bit of a running gag for his viewers. No one knows anything, except that these days, the Radio Demon is often seen around a winged cat, and an odd, gray-skinned girl.

Charlie, on the other hand, is the Princess Of Hell. To the common sinner, not much is known about her. She's more of an abstract presence since her role has her with responsibilities that don't et her get out as much. What is known is that sometimes appears after an Extermination, you can catch a glimpse of the third-most powerful demon in Hell looking around the devastated circles, cataloging the destruction.

While it's unknown how much of Hell's ruling she actually does, most of the things she attaches her name to have to do with the Extermination, or more accurately, the aftermath. Ways for sinners to get back on their feet after the exterminators pop in and trash shit, for example. Most of the Overlords don't really like having to do this, but even the greatest detractor puts the programs in place with some level of competence, after how the last Overlord to disobey her rules was... Punished.

______________________________________________________________

So, why the change of heart? Why would Alastor suddenly decide to try to redeem sinners? In a word: Vaggie.

During that particular Extermination Day, Vaggie crawls in an alley, injured and in pain. Lute left her alive, but her eye will never grow back, and she left her torn-off wings to rot in a trashcan a few steps away. Leaning against a dumpster, she decides she needs to rest.

Normally, she'd be afraid of sinners finding her, but she knows from the few of her former colleagues that she's talked to that were trapped in Hell after the Extermination ended and had to be extracted, that Sinners actually have a bit of a grace period after an Extermination, where violence is at an all time low. (She doesn't know this, but this is actually a decree by the Princess of Hell).

As she begins to drift off, however, a shadow falls over her. In canon, this would be Charlie, deciding to help what she thinks is a demon lucky enough to escape the Extermination with only a missing eye for it.

Here, though, the responsibilities of the Princess keep Charlie in her office, working and unable to go see what's been happening with the devastation. Here, her eyes snap open as she senses the aura of an Overlord, and right before everything goes dark, she realizes with horror, that whoever this demon is, he knows she's an Exorcist.

_________

When she awakes, she's tied to a table, restrained by dark tentacles that radiate demonic power in a room lit by a single bulb. The demon from before walks in, introducing himself as Alastor, and he asks for her name.

Naturally, she ignores him, instead demanding to know what he wants. She considers threatening him that she could call Exorcists down to extract her, but she knows that she's considered a traitor, and it'd never work. For some reason, the demon acquesious, and he explains that he's curious what exactly managed to harm an Exorcist so badly.

As an Overlord, he's seen and even fought off Exorcists before, and he's seen what happens when a demon harms one. They get back up. Tear an limb off and they regenerate, punch a hole through their chest and they'll be down for a while, but it'll close and they'll keep going. Suffocate one and given time, they'll start to breathe again. Even the more thorough methods of disposal simply result in the Exorcist turning into golden light and reconstituting themself or flying back to Heaven.

So, four years into his "sabbatical", when he followed the scent of an unfamiliar type of blood to the sight of an Exorcist missing their wings and an eye, he was naturally very interested. Knowing what, exactly managed to permanently harm an Exorcist is invaluable knowledge for an Overlord, after all, even though he's on a sort of sabbatical.

He threatens torture if she doesn't tell him how to kill an angel, even proposing a Deal where he won't use the knowledge against her (as long as she doesn't attack him) if she tells him. It's his turn to be surprised, however, when she just laughs, rejecting his deal only to just tell him the answer: the only thing that can harm an angel permanently is angelic power. He couldn't kill her even if she wanted him to, and with the guilt she's feeling and the pain she's in, she actually kind of wants to die.

Alastor, after some prodding, gets her to spill her story, and sensing opportunity, offers another Deal; for her to work under him in exchange for his protection, or if not, she can just leave, and he'll let her go. Demons gain power from having Deals, after all, and having one with an Angel is far too tempting.

Vaggie, believing that this is the best option she has, and that she'd probably not have to do that much more than what she'd have to even if she struck out on her own, accepts the Deal.

_________

Two years later, the two have formed a sort of "friendship?"with each other. It helps that despite Alastor being Alastor, with all the cruelty that implies, since Alastor's basically decided to disappear from politics, he has no real need for any sort of "enforcer" role for Vaggie, and she's more of an assistant than anything. She's also friends with Husk, having bonded over the collective experience of Alastor having them in a Deal, though it is strained at times since Vaggie's Deal is so much more lenient while Alastor owns Husk's soul.

It also helps that Alastor did defend her during Extermination days whenever some Exorcists tried to attack them. He doesn't want to lose his Deal with an Angel, after all!

Eventually, the topic of what goes on in Heaven when they're not down in Hell exterminating demons comes up between Vaggie and Alastor. It's all well and good until Vaggie mentions a woman she knows, and how she talks about her beloved son, and Alastor freezes. That woman? It's his mother. After some talking, Alastor tells her that his only real regret to what he's done (being a serial killer) is that his mother would be heartbroken that he'd turned out like that.

The conversation eventually turns to if Alastor could do someting she'd be proud of now, and, well. He's in Hell, there's not much he can think of right now that'd have the large impact he would want it to have. And honestly, while it does eat at him, he's had decades to make his peace with the fact that his mother would be severely disappointed in him now.

But the idea of doing something that'd make his mother proud stays with him. And eventually, after a conversation with Vaggie he comes up with the idea of redeeming sinners.

And so, one year later, Alastor's radio comes back up, and sinners start hearing of the Hazbin Hotel.

[silly-litttle-writer]

I have feelings about Aegon and since we’re all waiting for season two I’m gonna rant for a bit.

…

I’d like to talk about Alicent in the Green trailer saying something along the lines of “do you understand how much has been sacrificed to get you on the throne?” to Aegon and how low key manipulative that line is.

She knows Aegon doesn’t care about the throne but he does care about being burdensome to his family and that’s why the line most likely weighs heavily on him, we don’t quite know how he reacts from it but from the little bit in the trailer the line does affect him.

This is Aegon having to literally be dragged to his own coronation! This is Aegon trying to flee to Essos to avoid a war over the throne he doesn’t want or feel he is worthy of and ALICENT HAS THE AUDACITY TO SAY THAT TO HIM?! HE DIDNT WANT THIS! HE ACTIVELY TRIED TO AVOID ALL OF IT BECAUSE HE HATED THE IDEA OF TAKING THE THRONE SO MUCH HE WAS WILLING TO GIVE UP BEING A PRINCE! HE DIDNT ASK FOR ANY OF IT AND YOU’RE GOING TO USE THAT TO EMOTIONALLY HURT HIM?! Like I’m grateful the show is showing that side of her cause that is book accurate Alicent but I hattttteeee how Aegon is treated in the show and by the fandom.

I hatttteee that certain characters are deemed sympathetic and oh no poor them (Viserys) while others are not graced with an ounce of sympathy or most importantly empathy (Aegon). Is Viserys entirely bad? No, I hate him but I do not believe he has no redeeming qualities. He loved Aemma and he unfortunately realized his greed for a son was less important far too late, after he killed his wife for a son, does he love Rhaenyra and (sometimes, it’s rare cause Viserys is a coward by nature) stand up for her? Yes, but he is far less sympathetic than CHILD (say whatever you want about adult Aegon but child Aegon deserves none of what he is given) Aegon in my mind I will take no criticism on that. Viserys actively created the toxic environment he is surrounded by, if he’s suffering it’s of his own making. Aegon was a child for a bit of this nonsense and had absolutely no control over what happened around him.

Aegon is the son VISERYS FORCED TO EXIST. He manipulated (softly which is why people like Viserys more than like Larys Strong for example) but he still MANIPULATED (show Alicent not book Alicent cause book Alicent is the one who seduces him and manipulates him) Alicent into marrying him at 15, forcing her to have his children as she can’t deny her husband AND THE LITERAL KING. He wanted a son so badly he carved his first wife up to try to save the son that was killing her, this failed and so he forced Alicent to give him that son and then ONCE AEGON IS NO LONGER CUTE OR EASY TO LOVE HE TOSSES HIM ASIDE. He becomes completely and utterly absent in Aegon’s life and that’s not even talking about how little he cares about Helaena, Aemond, or Daeron, Daeron who was literally shipped off to another part of the continent. He does not care for Aegon, he doesn’t guide him, does not instruct him and teach him the ways of the world. Instead Aegon is stuck with having to rely on Criston “I bash in people’s skulls cause I can’t control my anger and I can’t get over the girl I fucked ten years ago” Cole and Otto “I view women as literal incubators for sons” Hightower, alongside Alicent “I’m a hypocritical coward who will damn and literally terrorize any woman who tries to find a way to cheat the patriarchal society instead of using my power as Queen to make my children’s lives better than my own” Hightower. These same people teach and raise him. One, they teach him to not regulate or handle his emotions. Two, they frequently and repeatedly beat and verbally insult him for just saying I don’t want to challenge my sister for a throne that isn’t mine. Three, teaches him and enables the toxic and sexist mentality perpetrated by the society that they live in that women are things to use and abuse by men and that consent does not matter to him because he is not only a man but a prince and she has no real right to deny him.

Why do you think Aegon grows to be an abuser? Because he was never taught anything else. His bad behavior was enabled or even encouraged, with only slight punishment from the same woman who literally paid his victim hush money to not tell people that her son forced himself on her. She stands there telling the girl her son forced himself on that “I understand” and “It’s not your fault” and then LITERALLY PAYS HER HUSH MONEY TO SHUT UP ABOUT IT AND GIVES HER WESTEROSI BIRTH CONTROL! THEREFORE ENABLING AND ALLOWING THAT BEHAVIOR AND SHE ACTS LIKE SHE HAD NO PART TO PLAY IN WHY HER SON BECAME AN ABUSER!

He is exactly your son. He is the son you chose to raise. Aegon wasn’t born like this, YOU MADE HIM LIKE THIS AND THEN DESPISE AND CURSE HIM FOR IT. He never had a chance to be anything else, he was doomed from the start and that is why I empathize more with Aegon than Viserys. Do I feel bad that Aegon was slapped and called out for forcing himself on a girl? No, he should have been properly punished. He should have been punished for that kind of behavior a LONG time ago. But that’s exactly the problem, Alicent doesn’t punish him for this behavior and then gets upset when he continues doing it. You created the “monster” in front of you and then are shocked when he does monstrous things. You made your own bed and now you refuse to lie in it and instead choose to frequently and repeatedly abuse, terrorize, and antagonize those who refuse to participate (Rhaenyra) in the system that turned you into a victim and your son into an abuser.

[dramioneasks]

HP FESTS: The HP Soulmates Fest (Twitter)

The HP Soulmates Fest 2023:

Unavoidable Fate by BlueZeldana - E, WIP - Since his third year at Hogwarts, Draco Malfoy saw images of him and the same curly-haired girl every time he looked in his crystal ball. The leaves of his tea always formed the letter H and the stars told him the same fate each night. It took him years, but he finally accepted it. She was his soulmate and the only woman he wanted by his side.He only had one problem: Hermione Granger thought Divination was a fraud.

The Immortal Draco Malfoy by SaffronGin - M, WIP - With no memory of who he is, the man-with-no-name seeks to find what he has lost. In his wake, he leaves the bodies of the Dark Wizards that dared get in his way.A kind wizard, Harry Potter is accidentally saved, and takes it upon himself to redeem the bloody stranger, and to help him chase his past so he can have a decent future.However, the nameless wizard doesn't count on Harry Potter's wife to feel like a light in his neverending darkness.

By All Rights Mine by sundayviolet - E, WIP - When Voldemort survived at the Battle of Hogwarts years ago, the Order was forced to retreat and regroup. The secret to Voldemort’s demise lies within Malfoy Manor, but gaining access has proven impossible, until Hermione discovers a way past its wards: Conceive a Malfoy child. (WARNINGS: RAPE/NON-CON)

Reluctantly Yours by art_emissss - T, WIP - Granger,I'm sorry that it's me.D.M.Or: A story of two soulmates, told through a stack of letters found among personal belongings of Hermione Jean Granger.

The Otter and Her Dragon by nissasxnotes - T, WIP - Hermione Granger is always running from the things that scare her in her dreams - nightmares, more accurately. However, one night, she finds a dragon who makes her feel safe and protected. Throughout her life, she continues seeing the dragon on some of the most challenging days in her life. She is left wondering why the dragon shows up when he does and why she feels safe when the dragon is there.  - - - Draco Malfoy's life is perfect. He is a pureblood of the Sacred 28 and heir to the Malfoy legacy. There is nothing that could make him question his life. Until, one night, an otter appears in his dreams claiming he saved her. And then, the otter keeps appearing in his dreams. He can't figure out why, but feels like he he has to protect the otter from whatever is trying to hurt her.

misunderstandings and other problems by riddikulus_puff - M, one-shot - soulmate noun a person ideally suited to another as a close friend or romantic partner.-Hermione Granger had been searching high and low, behind closed doors and through open windows for the person that would be labelled as her soulmate. The person that could be labelled as her soulmate. She had tried almost everything. She ran tests on herself and secretly performed tests on others in search of finding her soulmate. The person she was destined to be with for the rest of her life. But, still couldn't find anyone that suited her. Ronald Weasley was a blank slate. The same was for Harry Potter and the other Weasley brothers that she had run the tests on. However, Hermione hadn't expected herself to get closer to Draco Malfoy through their work together at the Ministry of Magic. And even the tests she'd run said he wasn't her soulmate, but Crookshanks, her familiar, knew better than anyone who would be better suited for his Hermione Granger.

it's getting colder by aCanadianMuggle - M, WIP - Hermione has been researching soulmates since she found out hers had died before she had a chance to meet them. Harry, who's been working as an auror since graduation, has called her in as an expert to help Draco Malfoy track down a stolen sliver of his heart.

Kismet By Any Other Name by bastet_dreams - E, 4 chapters - Draco's curiosity sets him on a path of collision with none other than Hermione Granger 💫

Across the Void by oceanxpoppy - E, one-shot - It's been years and the war drags on. Within the chaos, Hermione and Draco have hidden away their relationship, kept their love a secret even from each other as they wait for the perfect moment that may never arrive.

My soulmate is who? by grangermalfoy07 - M, WIP - Two years after the war, Hermione and Pansy find tattoos on their body. Specifically soulmate tattoos. The problem? Their soulmates are who they least expect.

Loquacious by AccioMjolnir - T, one-shot - Every time Hermione Granger crosses paths with Draco Malfoy, the strangest thing keeps happening.They keep talking.

I’ll Keep it With Mine by hawthornandwine - M, WIP - Draco’s mark appears when he turns eighteen.He has been in Azkaban for a week, following an expedited trial led by the surviving elders of the Order, as both the Wizengamot and the ministry still scramble to pick up the pieces. No matter how dubious and biased the trial, the verdict is iron-clad and given the stamp of approval by the ministry. Draco has been sentenced to 20 years.When his mark appears, Draco’s heart sinks. He had hoped to be one of the luckier ones, the few Malfoys that lived a life without a mark and a destined mate. It doesn’t help that the initials on his wrist belong to the girl he’s been half in love with since age 11, since September 1st, 1991. That they belong to the girl he’d been forced to watch writhe and scream as she was tortured in his home.HJG. Hermione Jean Granger.

Where I end and you begin by Vofastudum - M, WIP - "She's been bitten. And the bond he has tried so hard to block from his consciousness forces itself alive.He can feel her heartbeat in his system. Much slower than it's supposed to be. He can sense her in every nerve. Feel every wound and bruise and broken bone.There’s no room for denial anymore; She's his soulmate. And she's dying."Hermione becomes a werewolf and Draco is her mate. If only she knew that.

The Beast of Wiltshire by Ridley_bean - E, one-shot - Something is lurking in the night and terrorizing Wiltshire.Can Theodore Nott, channeling the power of tennis legend Billie Jean King, solve the mystery and save the day? Can he simultaneously throw a fantastic party? Maybe do the party first and address the beast later.Will Pansy Pansy Parkinson find her match in an unfortunately ginger companion, or is she destined to start her late in life lesbian phase at the tender age of 26?And is that a rash on Blaise Zabini's groin, or is it just razor burn?Also, it appears a group of wizards cast a spell, and Hermione Granger may be Draco Malfoy's soulmate. If he believed in any of that nonsense.Welcome to the Summer of Love.

In Memory by sarsalvachester - T, one-shot - A few glimpses lucky witnesses got to see of their love.

and the red on my face is matching you by itsteryn - E, one-shot - He laughed. So harshly it almost brought tears to her eyes. “You think you’re dying, Granger? You know nothing about dying.”

Threads of Gold by CSIsui - G, WIP - He sees her now.Amidst the blood, smoke, and debris of war, there she was. In front of him. Again. He knew they would meet again. Regardless of how far apart they become, regardless of the distance between them. They will always come back to each other. Always.

Sun and Moon by pinkhairandbooks - M, one-shot - August 11, 1999 - Total Eclipse The first Total Solar Eclipse that Hermione experienced as the new Sun was the moment her life changed. She had recently said goodbye to her predecessor and knew that the Moon had done the same, so she was eager to meet the other half of her sky, imagining she was relatively young like herself and that they could become friends. She certainly did not expect to come face-to-face with him.When he saw her for the first time he was dazzled. When she saw him for the first time she felt as if a piece of her soul had returned to its proper place, although she did not even realize that it had shifted from the beginning.

In The Third Time by dorothymalfoy - T, one-shot - Three lives, three chances. Will our favourite couple finally manage to get their timing right?

This fest is ongoing.

[fantasygerard2000]

So, one of the lousy criticisms Wish gets is its use of too many references to movies that are better than it. This critique just feels heavily biased if i'm being honest. As much as I am fond of some of the older Disnsy movies, which are the reasons why I like Wish, I would exactly call them good. Youtuber Veridis Joe made a video discussing about how just because it's the first, doesn't mean that it's good.

Let's use an obvious example, Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs. Wish takes heavy inspiration from Snow White as it makes sense for their 100th movie to revisit their roots. The saying that Snow White is better than Wish is a lie because, is Snow White really better story and character wise?

That's the kicker with some of these older Disney movies. Just because they're "classics" doesn't mean they're free from criticisms. Hell, people are criticizing that Snow White and Aurora despite the being title characters don't get to do crap and are overshadowed by their own villains and sidekicks. Just because Snow White was the first doesn't mean it holds up. It aged like milk and the reason why people like it is because it invented the classical tropes we associate Disney, people like it because it's "traditionally animated". They care more about the decorations than the foundation.

That's the thing with nostalgia and why at some times, it's not good. People grew up with the old movies and that's why they heavily favored them over reboots and live action remakes. Disregarding the things that are improved because their automatic response to things that are different is to antagonize them. And this is especially problematic when some people actually misremembered the thing they are nostalgic for. The insistence the crybabies on Tiktok insist that Rapunzel should be played by a blonde white actress even though Rapunzel's natural hair color is brown, they they be acting stupid by forgetting wigs and special effecfs exists simply because of a fan casting.

Back on the topic of easter eggs. While some can be groan inducing, most of them are harmless and something that Disney fans can go find. That says something that some of these critics don't watch the movie and pay attention to what it wants to convey and rather list down the things they wanna be mad about, like the songs, the quirky main character, the goat's voice, the scrapped draft and the villain.

Speaking of which.

While Magnifico is the highlight of the movie after years of lacking antagonists and underwhelming twist villains, people are still complaining over him not being a complete villain because of his motivation.

The main gripe people have about him is that be seemed reasonable and that his switch from villain is "sudden", saying that the book is just there as lazy excuse to make him evil and redeemable. This, is media illiteracy. As much as I don't like to bill this to takes I don't like, it's an accurate description.

Magnifico's villainy is applicable to influencers and social media personalities. And considering the age where some of these "celebrities" are outed for being and doing shady things, it fits to a T. You don't know a person is toxic until you found out. And like with Amaya, you don't know if your spouse/partner really loves and cares for you you until you see what they can do to you once they have enough power and influence.

Going back to the topic of previous Disney movies being "superior" to Wish, there's one movie I like to bring up. Princess and the Frog.

Princess and the Frog has many similarities to Wish. After a period of several experimental 3D animated movies that were passable but forgettable, sorry Bolt and Robinsons fans, PatF returns to the old formula of 2D animated, musicals, villains and romance.

Tiana is a great character and her story about working hard to achieve her dreams is in line with Wish's themes. Facilier and Magnifico are even comparable as both men "cheat" their way to get to the top by using magic that isn't theres and suffering the consequences for it.

And like I said above about how classics aren't free from any criticism, PatF has its own problems, mostly about Disney's first black princess being a frog for most of its runtime, and the convoluted plot revolving around technicalities to break the spell. What holds PatF back are these issues and some people dismiss them because they are too focused on the 2D animation, romance, villains, which aren't bad tropes, aren't enough to save your movie. Same way how even if Wish was 2D animated and had a love interest, people will still crap on it because it's Disney in 2023/2024.

Oh contraire, if any of the classical and renaissance films are made and released today as they are, they wouldn't be praised today as they were back then.

[itsjustpoopeh]

and while i'm here at the library with the good wifi and a keyboard let me address something else to the toxic weirdasses trying to pretend it's ✨internalized misogyny✨ because "if tommy were a woman you would hate her yall hated all his other girlfriends"

hmm. no 💃🏽

let's go through the list of buck's girlfriends, which i personally disliked and why. you'll be surprised to find that i only hated one, and it had to do with the way kristen reidel butchered her character to make a self insert

Abby - i liked abby a lot. she was flawed and vulnerable and liked buck. she helped him mature and become a little more thoughtful, and i think let him figure out how much he wanted to be in a real relationship and have all those romantic experiences (hot air balloon date i'll always regret your premature murder). yeah she left him in an awful way and didn't bother to apologize and i hated her for THAT but during the relationship? nah fam i was rooting for those crazy kids

Ali - hell i REALLY liked Ali. smart, sassy, fun, also just liked buck and enjoyed his company. i didn't like her abrupt exit from the show but it's perfectly valid for someone to say "i can't handle the danger you're in and this won't end well for either of us if we try"

let's skip taylor and come back

natalia - i LIKED her at first. sure she was a little judgy about all his crazy ass shenanigans but uh... who tf wouldn't be? she wasn't judging him as a person, just being like "bruh wtf have you gotten yourself in to?" they didn't do a lot to flesh out her character because... well, see: kristen reidel and then this season tim had to dump her character bc she didn't want to come back (valid of her tbh)

aight and the TAYLOR of it all:

i liked taylor when she was introduced. i said it

or, to be more accurate, i enjoyed her character and what i thought the purpose of her character as a plot device was going to be

i will forever die on the hill that taylor kelly could have been an excellent recurring friendly antagonist. a ruthless, ambitious, snarky reporter, getting in bitch fights with eddie every time she shows up to horn in on the 118 for one of her investigations trying to climb the vicious corporate news ladder. getting in the way, occasionally helping out against her will, climbing buck like a tree in bar restrooms, then flouncing off until her next appearance. it would have been great

and then kristen reidel needed a self-insert, tried to redeem her with no actual work done on selling it, made her spineless, then turned her back into an awful unethical reporter when she needed to get rid of her, and worse, made her BORING AS FUCK doing it AND didn't accomplish any narrative purpose with it? nah fuck that shit.

and what i want you to notice is that NONE OF THAT HAS FUCK ALL TO DO WITH BUDDIE

godDAMN y'all are testing my nerves

[deathlessathanasia]

One has to wonder what is it about the marriage of Aphrodite and Hephaistos that lends itself so easily to sanitisation and romanticisation. Sure, it is not even comparable to the romanticisation and sanitisation of Hades and Persephone, but at least this second one has in its favour the fact that the relationship seems harmonious enough after its violent beginning, and that Persephone becomes her husband's equal with unparalleled authority over the Underworld. But Hephaistos and Aphrodite… What do we have there? An arranged marriage, a public infidelity scandal, a public humiliation, a separation (in the Odyssey Hephaistos demands that the gifts he gave to Zeus in exchange for Aphrodite's hand be returned to him,, in the Library of Apollodoros it is claimed that Hephaistos tried to rape Athena after he was deserted by Aphrodite, and Nonnos mentions their divorce as well), even an instance of the betrayed spouse taking revenge on their partner's affair child. If anything, it could be argued that these two have far more in common with Zeus and Hera than with Hades and Persephone. And yet…

In one of the retellings I've read recently, Aphrodite is portrayed as an entirely devoted and loving wife to Hephaistos; incidentally, Zeus and Hera are the only unhappily married couple in the pantheon. In another, Aphrodite and Hephaistos have a complicated but ultimately mutually loving marriage; she was married off to him without being asked, but she wanted it actually and even if she cheats on him, she loves him and wants him to pay attention to her. By contrast, Zeus and Hera's relationship is completely terrible; she only married him because he raped her, she hates him, and it very much looks like they are the only example of a loveless marriage among the gods. In another one, while Zeus and Hera are portrayed in a pretty mythologically accurate way with everything that entails, Aphrodite is once again the incredibly loving and devoted wife of Hephaistos and she even turns against all the other gods for his sake. And in yet another, Aphrodite does sleep around, but she is supportive and kind and loving to Hephaistos, whereas Zeus is an one-dimensional, evil bastard who is incredibly abusive towards Hera and nothing beyond that. And these are just a few examples, all from books I've read these few past weeks, but these kinds of interpretations are quite popular and commonly encountered in Greek myth-based stories. I could list so many titles, of both published books and retellings on the internet, where this spin on the myths is used, where some "problematic" relationships are made pretty and sweet and loving, while others are allowed to stay problematic or are deliberately made even worse.

But why are these interpretations so common? What is this all about? Is it the fact that Aphrodite is a woman, so it is easier to disregard her infidelity? Or that people find it very easy to sympathise with Hephaistos, so they like to imagine that his wife does actually desire and love him whereas Hera is a far less sympathetic character and people enjoy to portray Zeus in the most negative manner possible? Or is it the appeal of an unattractive man (obligatory note that Hephaistos is never called ugly in ancient Greek sources) being loved by the most beautiful woman? Is it a way to "redeem" Aphrodite, as if she needs such a thing and as if that's the way to do it? Is it all of that? Something else? I wish I knew. I wish I understood on what basis people decide which mythological relationships deserve to be whitewashed.

Currently, my theory is that generally it is all about the male characters involved; not really about the women or about the myths. That is to say, it is about whether or not people love the male characters. People generally love Hades, so they like to imagine that Persephone loves him too, that she went with him of her own accord, that she wanted him from the beginning. If it was about her rather than him, retellings wouldn't so frequently have her be sexually assaulted by other gods or men, wouldn't so frequently make her a nobody when she is at Demeter's side and entirely dependent on her husband for power and respect, wouldn't so frequently disrespect her relationship with her mother. If it was about the myth, they wouldn't so frequently remove the kidnapping. People generally dislike/hate Zeus, so of course he must be the worst™ and whatever. The idea that he raped Hera and she had no choice but to marry him (source?) is not as popular and frequently used in retellings as it is because it is just so well attested in the myths (it is really not), or because people care oh so much about Hera (she is among the most hated mythological figures), but because it reinforces the image of Zeus as the worst™. And since he is the worst™, of course he doesn't care for the one goddess whom he has chosen to stay married to forever regardless of all conflicts and betrayals. People generally love Hephaistos, so Aphrodite has to love him too, or she must be a villain if she does not. If it was about Aphrodite, not being faithful to her husband wouldn't be considered something that needs to be fixed. To be fair, maybe it is not so much about Hephaistos either, since he has other wives and this marriage is not an essential or central aspect of his mythology any more than it is for Aphrodite, yet all too often it is treated like it is.

[antianakin]

I honestly think deep down Shin wants to be a Jedi. She has the Padawan braid. She's asking questions about the Order. Baylan in his own quest for power or whatever else he's looking for in bringing back the Empire that murdered millions is not even giving her the true choice to be a Jedi or knock off Sith. I do want to know how she ended up his apprentice but I truly think once you Fall at all you're unable to be a true mentor, you just see the apprentice as a tool.

Wild to me possibly the only (not Master Huyang) character who's never met a real Jedi or been part of the order actually is interested in it. Tbh I want more of Reva and her breaking free from the Inquisitors and wouldn't mind Shin getting her own freedom arc as well. (We're back to Please Bring Reva Back)

I'm not sure I'd personally go so far as to say she WANTS to be a Jedi so much as that Shin is perhaps very CURIOUS about it. It's unclear just how much Baylan has actually shared with her about what being a Jedi was even like, what it would've meant, the kind of things they did, etc. And she seems young enough that she'd have grown up in a time when the Jedi were already destroyed and knowledge about them and their existence was being stamped out so much that it nearly reduced them to the stuff of legends. I don't think Shin knows enough about what the Jedi ARE in order to want to be one. She knows Baylan used to be one and that they are now gone, yes, and is clearly curious about what that means for Baylan and for her and their relationship, but I think that's likely about as far as it goes. And, ironically, that ignorance is potentially what allows her to be less negative about the Jedi than anybody else. She didn't know them well enough to create her own opinion, she can't be disappointed in them the way Baylan and Ahsoka seem to be, and isn't exposed to Huyang discussing "Jedi protocols" the way Sabine is. So instead of being disappointed or annoyed by anything Jedi, she's just... neutrally curious about it.

Baylan and Shin's dynamic had the potential to be really interesting, to really work as a foil for Anakin and Ahsoka (or a parallel, perhaps more accurately), and it just... never quite got there. There wasn't enough focus on who they were as people or what got them to where they are now and what either of them even wants out of life and this relationship. It could've been really interesting to look at another relationship where the mentor seems in control and like he's got good intentions but has also fallen to a desire for power and taken advantage of this child he's taken on as an apprentice and the impact this actually has on the apprentice in the long-term. But doing that would've required recognizing that Anakin wasn't actually always a good person, that Anakin was perhaps NOT actually that good of a master to Ahsoka, and that Anakin having already begun his descent into darkness when he took on Ahsoka has had long-term negative impacts on her. And this show was unwilling to do any of that. So there's really no way to make any kind of meaningful parallel with Baylan and Shin, which is too bad.

I definitely think that Shin asking about the Jedi and being abandoned by Baylan has potentially laid the beginnings of a "redemption arc" for her, but whether it'll actually be done at all well is very very questionable. I don't think they laid anywhere NEAR enough groundwork for their characters to make me give a shit about Shin being redeemed or to understand why she'd even WANT to put in that kind of work. I have no idea what Shin wants aside from a very generic idea of "power" which she seems to be bouncing around trying to find (training with Baylan, fighting for Thrawn, taking over the bandits). We'll see where that goes, I guess.

But Reva had INCREDIBLE set-up to continue following her journey. Reva basically HAD a "redemption arc" of sorts in the Kenobi show where we see some of the bad things she's done, we find out exactly why she did those things, we see her reach her goal and FAIL, and then we see her struggle through the aftermath of that failure until she makes the choice to stop and do better. There is so much beautiful set-up for Reva to go places from here, to see Reva not just find freedom, but to see Reva truly reclaim her identity as a JEDI. I'd LOVE to see Reva figure out how to be a Jedi again despite how little training she actually got. The only other character with as little training as Reva so far has been Grogu and Grogu chose to LEAVE the Jedi life behind in favor of being a Mandalorian. Kanan and Cal were both padawans already, but Reva? Reva was still an initiate, we don't even know if she ever had a gathering to make her own lightsaber. There's SO MUCH left open to explore with her and, with the right showrunner, such a beautiful story to tell about what it means to be a Jedi under these specific circumstances and how being a Jedi can save you from your own darkness.

I'd take a Reva follow-up story over a single more moment of Shin ANY DAY.

[spop-romanticizes-abuse]

I'm not a catra stan-stan and definitely not an apologist but I really like her character. Her redemption arc was botched and it's a shame because she had a really interesting character, and she had perspective on abuse that I'd never seen portrayed before.

I live in a relatively abusive home with (gross generalisation here) me as a scapegoat and my brother as the golden child. I'm not proud of it but i've been abusive like catra (even if not to this extent because ??????? She did reallyfucked up things ?????????). And seeing that on screen, it was freeing in a way, like staring in a really dark mirror, and it felt good to have a character to relate too in this aspect.

And then came the redemption arc 🤡 honestly Catra's point of view is not badly written from what I remember. Like trying your best to be a better person and stop being abusive, but the other person doing something that sets you off and falling back on those patterns on instincts ? I've been there, and it's somewhat nice to have the scene with mealog to relate to for example. Having to take responsibility for your actions and your reactions, but every sorry feels awful and has to be torn out of you because you feel guilty as fuck and you know apologies aren't gonna change anything, and you know there will be other instances when your abusive tendencies will take over despite your best efforts? It was freeing to see those sorts of moments on screen.

But adora shouldn't have forgiven her. The others shouldn't have forgiven her. Maybe they could be forgiven, but not trusted. It doesn't make sense, it's rushed, it's stupid, I hate it. Also catra stops feeling guilty really fucking early for what she's done, like ma'am show a bit more remorse you tried to kill her ? Stop complaining when frosta punches you in the face, it's explainable and you deserve it. In her redemption, she lashed at Adora once or twice, got told it's okay I forgive you please don't do it anymore and suddenly she was "fixed". That's not how it works and it sucks, it hurts, that's not how it works. We never saw a broken catra post redemption, and it lacked.

So, yeah. I'm pissed about her redemption arc, and it's a shame because i really wanted to see it work.

(I didn't even mention catradora because that's not the point but the amatonormativity of it all? You're broken but your true love's kiss has fixed you so it's okay)

this is exactly how i feel too! i didn't start off hating catra because she was a really compelling villain and a scarily accurate version of an abuse victim who started adopting those abusive tendencies themselves. i didn't relate to her entirely but i could definitely relate to some aspects of her, especially her anger that sometimes got best of her.

but it feels like the creators forgot that she was supposed to be redeemed and kept making her do the most heinous things with no remorse, only to remember in s5 that she needs to be redeemed, and shoving a hasty redemption arc where she ultimately does not change at all.

i don't think even catra's perspective was that good because she only changed for adora. she didn't redeem herself because she knew what she was doing was wrong or because she regretted taking part in the war. she did it because she wanted adora back and also because she was of no use to horde prime.

and after getting saved by adora, catra honestly does not try much to actually correct her mistakes. she keeps lashing out at adora and abusing her, she's snarky with the other princesses and keeps falling back into her old habits. and no one ever calls her out for it. healing is not linear, sure, but there should have been someone who would keep catra in check and call her out when she starts acting shitty again.

but no, the only instance of her trying that we got was when she admitted that she was working on her anger issues, and then immediately proceeded to guilt trip adora by saying that adora was giving her a hard time.

catra really had a lot of potential but it's a shame the creators valued a rushed toxic romance more than actual character development and good storytelling.

[thebestofoneshots]

okok so i just wanted to compliment ur writing in a way i haven’t seen others compliment it and it’s smth that i never see in any literature ever w fem MCs especially fan fiction. i love the way u give the MC a personality and life of her own. i like that’s he can stand up for herself and has hopes and passions that don’t just correlate with the men in the series. this is insane for fan fiction ESPECIALLY cuz it’s x reader. i don’t think u understand how much i appreciate it and it’s one of the reasons i most look forward to ur chapters. she’s not just some dumb silly, small, boy-crazy, and perfect mc and i love that!! teen girls are so complex and u right that so well. anyway love ya 🤍🤍

Aww darling this is so sweet!

And let me tell you, (this is most def gonna be a small rant) I feel like reader-insert fics have a really bad reputation, and I know there are factions of the internet that absolutely despise them but I have to say some of the best fanfiction I've ever read, have been reader inserts.

So, while I do know there are some bad ones (I've seen them and read them), I also think the genre has the potential for greatness. I mean, just think about it, it's kind of like playing a videogame in which you get to choose the character you're playing as, customizing and all that. But nobody goes around criticizing video games where you get to basically self-insert into the narrative, do they? (I mean I suppose they do but that's because people like criticizing stuff)

If Dante did it, why can't we?

Either way, what I mean to say is that I'm trying to be one of those incredibly good writers I've encountered who basically redeem the genre by being single-handedly incredible. Writers like @wkemeup @kquil @embrassemoi @maiden-of-asgard @lokisgoodgirl @lokischambermaid @pseudonymmcwriter @matchavellichor @buckyskorpion @myfictionaldreams and many many more writers out there that time after time deliver incredibly amazing content, that never ceases to amaze me!

I'm starting a Defense Club for Reader fics, who wants to join in?

Also... I'm so glad you guys don't think MC is "miss perfect", because she might be talented but she's also dumb and stubborn as fuck and weaving that into the narrative has been so much fun! I didn't want a Jane Doe, I wanted a strong female character with actual fucking flaws and character growth because I want and need to see her struggle and improve. The whole "she's magically talented thing" does not vibe with me. Even if she is a little bit gifted, but then again, she has to be if she wants to keep up with the marauders.

i love the way u give the MC a personality and life of her own. i like that’s he can stand up for herself and has hopes and passions that don’t just correlate with the men in the series.

Ugh this! So happy this is the impression it's giving because since the start, I tried to have the series pass the Bechdel Test because I want to accurately represent women in the story. And while yes, they are teens and of course, they're thinking about dating, they also have their own issues. And while this is the story of how Vixen, Sirius and Remus end up in a throuple, it is also the story of how Vixen ends up in Hogwarts and deals with her new life there, and that aspect of the story is just as interesting to me as the relationship drama.

Either way, I want to thank you for your nice comments, I've had one hell of a week and this most definitely made me feel a lot better. lysm.

Read Gilded Constellations

[bigblueoctoling]

So, Side Order

Thoughts and theories below. I'll be getting into Everything.

I think Side Order sets off with a very bad first impression, but the story shortly develops. Side Order's biggest fault is simply in placing the Finale at the end of the first run; Of course one naturally should assume that more content would come after beating your first run, since this was very obviously marketed as a roguelike, but a roguelike generally shouldn't present completing your first run as completing the game. Any contemporary roguelike like Hades or Isaac will also have the credits after the first run, but the conclusion given is typically that Your Job Is Not Over. The way Side Order does it is as if Isaac's first ending was The Beast. I can't really blame people for mistakenly believing that the "Story" was over after that.

I also have to mention that I LOVE the Final Final Phase with collecting All Of The Color Swatches, but it really really cheapens how cool of a moment it is for Eight when the FINAL ATTACK is just... Pearl doing the killer wail a second time. Like, could you really not come up with ANYTHING else? I like Pearl's killer wail, it's cool, but it just felt like Eight got completely robbed of a moment.

With those two things out of the way I can safely say that Side Order was overall very good. It was kind of a rollercoaster for me, initially.

For a lot of it, I was really irked at how generic the whole Evil AI Story was, but it really develops as time goes on without really outright spelling things out for you.

I was deeply worried when I got Octavio's palette; one of my biggest fears for Splatoon currently is the idea of them trying to redeem Octavio, who is blatantly just a war tyrant who grooms child soldiers. That's not me reading too deeply into subtext, that's just what the text is. But as you keep going through it it becomes pretty clear- Marina in particular is the one who's phrasing everything like it's Really Not So Bad.

One of Side Order's major themes is Marina repressing trauma.

Smollusk is never really given an outright explanation on their origin, but I think it's fairly clear if you pay attention to how Smollusk acts- Smollusk is, in part, a manifestation of the "weakness" in Marina's subconscious Order used to infiltrate her mind. As far as evidence goes, it's pretty clear with how Smollusk swoons over Pearl- but additionally, I feel a lot of their notes from clearing palettes are relevant to this. In particular, in relation to the theme of Marina's repressed thoughts, there's Sheldon's info- The fact that they outright condemn Sheldon for taking "two young, impressionable children who've known him since they were babies and raised them to inherit his legacy", and "drill a love for weapons into them" seems to outright be a condemnation of Octavio's treatment of Octarians, while also skirting around directly condemning Octavio of such due to repressing what she went through.

In addition to that, I feel Acht's presence is a key part of this theme as well- it is extremely in character for someone as empathetic as Marina to downplay something she herself went through, especially in the context of being around someone who went through something much worse, with Acht's sanitization. Marina consistently refers to it as her Job, and Octavio as her Boss, while Acht will outright describe it accurately as conscription.

There's also the aspect of the other octarians- namely, the concept of Octarians who "didn't want things to change". At first, the concept reviled me- but I came to realize that this wasn't really about blaming Marina for leaving- after all, this wasn't an active desire of the Octarians involved, this was a shared subconscious feeling. It's less that Marina "abandoned the Octarian Military", but rather, that the people left behind felt abandoned by Marina's leaving. They surely wouldn't actively express this, but... it left an impact all the same.

Most clearly this is expressed by Acht. With the final notes unlocked from Eight's palette, I feel like it paints a very clear picture- Acht cared deeply for Marina. After Marina left... Acht fell into a complete depressive spiral. They used music to fill the void left by her absence, eventually to the point that they were willing to let themselves be sanitized. I feel like a lot of people are kind of distracted by the idea of Acht's irritation of Pearl and Marina's flirting being funny to realize that their discomfort is coming from the fact that Acht had very Heavy feelings for Marina. Acht, possibly more than anyone else, represents the idea of wanting things to stay the same back then. The ultimate conclusion being that Acht moves on from everything, accepts the change, but is happy to be able to be here, in the better future Marina created by making the risk to change everything.

I honestly feel like this is the intended story, but at the same time, that it's going to go over a lot of peoples' heads. But it really paints a very dynamic plotline that I think they handled masterfully.

For context for people who don't know me, to put it bluntly, I kin Acht and Eight pretty fucking hard. I can't say enough how thankful I am that Acht is written largely how I've always envisioned her. I wrote a fairly extensive fic myself on how I imagined sanitization worked, and the way Acht made their way to the surface, and how Marina worked to cure their sanitization. Suffice to say, while my interpretation was different, I'm deeply, deeply pleased that the canonical direction was largely similar to my own, in that Marina would absolutely be way too empathetic to not try to rescue the sanitized octarians from the NILS statue. And for what it's worth, I'm kind of glad, albeit mostly as a writer and less as a player, that they left a lot of the details open-ended, so I have MOUNTAINS of material to work with in writing another, more accurate fic. I'm also very happy that Eight is very heavily relevant! Acht is characterized perfectly. Very emotionally reserved, but has a lot of feelings hidden behind that wall.

As for Eight and Acht, let's talk about them, because I feel they are very intentionally linked, beyond the similarity of their names. It stands out very heavily that Eight's palette is here, but Acht's is simply missing. The idea that Acht's palette was simply already configured doesn't quite track to me- it feels more like an excuse Marina cooked up to keep Acht from worrying. I came to a realization of a theory shortly after completing the game that I was mortified at being true, because it was a worst-case-scenario I thought of shortly after Acht's reveal, which is:

Acht is Eight.

This upset me a lot because, well, I kin both of them- I have a lot of self-perceptions tied to each of them. If they're both the same character, to put it bluntly, it feels like I'm basically having one of them get forcibly removed. Some people get confused when I say this upsets me, but simply put, it just doesn't gel with my brain.

The most upsetting thing is how many holes in the plot it seems to fill in perfectly.

Eight, Marina, and Pearl were the only ones who initially entered the spire. Why was Acht already there, 'physically', as opposed to everyone else who merely got their soul sucked in through the sea cucumber phone?

Where even is Acht, physically? They're presumably still in the NILS statue, since it's pretty heavily implied that the memverse is what made Acht in control over their body.

Why doesn't Acht have a palette, even if it was already somehow automatically complete? Pearl and Marina just sort of have theirs with them. Why doesn't Acht?

Why is Eight's palette so huge and fucked up?

Why does Eight's palette unlock notes from Acht?

Why do we not actually see Acht physically in the real world? On the news, rather than just showing the three standing together, they show Pearl and Marina standing next to the old album art of Acht.

Why do we not get much of any feedback to explain if Eight gets their memories back?

Upsettingly, it even kind of goes to explain why Nintendo would give Acht they/them pronouns- as happy as I am for Acht to just be nonbinary, the explanation that Acht is Eight would explain why Nintendo would do that.

Most upsettingly, it seemed like nothing really hard countered this evidence- Eight and Acht look completely different, but that's kind of a nebulous hurdle to get over when everything else seems to line up so perfectly.

...However, thankfully, I came to learn that, of all things, TABLETURF BATTLE would save me from this theory being real. Acht is real, physically. Logically it doesn't track that Acht would exist physically after Eight, since, you know, you're definitely playing as Eight in Octo Expansion, so I think it's safe to say that this theory is a non-starter. Huge relief to me.

That being said, I still feel like this theory has legs- it certainly would make a very good super depressing fic where Acht has to come to grips with the fact that they don't exist anymore, but I'm not in the business of making that kind of fic.

On the other hand, I do think the fact that so many things line up does imply a lot about Acht and Eight, if not strictly canonically speaking. I think it's very possible for it to be something like:

Eight is a clone of Acht.

This, for the most part, explains the plot holes listed above, and explains the weird green goo that we initially find Eight in. It also adds more fun to work with for writing the two. We get a lot of language like "Who am I?" with Eight in particular, and giving Eight an identity crisis on top of everything else sounds fun. It also explains the visual discrepancies, a clone can look different from the host, but clones sharing souls tracks. I'm keeping this headcanon.

I also just think the color swatch system, and the design for Dramatic Days in Orderland as a whole, are very Neat and very Cute and line up with my autism very very very well. It makes me very deeply happy how autism-coded Marina is in this, and frankly, this being her solution to curing sanitized octarians is even more indulgent to my own interests than my own self-indulgent fan fic was. I cannot WAIT to write more and think about Marina's silly virtual worlds. Especially with how power-trip-y this one is; the fact that she envisions herself as the final boss is really a lot of food for thought.

As a whole, all of Side Order is an enormous amount of food for thought. This is EXACTLY what Splatoon 3 has been missing- fodder for theorycrafting and fanfic-writing and so forth. The world of Splatoon 3 has felt so stagnant and all of this is an enormous breath of fresh air that makes me excited for the future of the series.

In closing:

Smollusk is a product of the subconscious of those who worked on the game.

Acht loved Marina but lacked the self-esteem to express it to Marina. Marina left and Acht took it pretty hard, but they're okay now.

Eight is a clone of Acht and they share one huge fucked up broken soul. Whoops!