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#out here with their blorbos doing god's work
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Feeling called out rn. 😂
stuartmackeyofficial
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theladyem · 3 months
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I don want to sleep I want to think about Kim Kitsuragi
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thylionheart · 3 months
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I’ve mentioned before, I’m making a folklore book for my baby nibling and of course we want a multi-regional book of folklore so I am desperately trying and failing to find a Mesopotamian myth where sex isn’t too important a plot point
#I found a work around for Odin hanging himself on the World Tree but idk if I can save Nergal and Ereshkigal#so many descents and returns from the underworld for my yet wee nibling#bc they are going to be a winter solstice baby <3#00#Nergal’s Descent into the underworld and then courtship of the Queen of the dead is so interesting#and it is so fragmented I can read it as sweeter than I probably originally was#god of war getting humiliated and having to go to the underworld to apologize to Ereshkigal#only to get there after doing all these tricks to ensure he can return from the underworld#he gets there and immediately decides I am going to trick my way into a throne by this Queen’s side 😍#who else has ever traveled to the land of the dead and been like I gotta- I gotta figure out a way to stay here forever#ur blorbo could never#but yeah he does all the traditional avoidances of drinking or eating in the underworld m#but the one rule he breaks is that he mustn’t sleep with Ereshkigal#he said o no but she’s hot#the line is «that which men and women do together» so I guess I could change it to kissing#or like the act of talking/falling in love#which is what I did for a Tristan and Isolde type variant#Ianna/Ishtar’s descent into the underworld would have been the traditional winter solstice/turning of the year myth of choice#but it is so… esoteric bc it is fragmented as well#there is some meaning that is not coming through and as it stands I don’t like the… un-nuanced take on Ianna#Goddess of Love and Sex is vain? tired and boring#I feel like I’d need to become an assyriologist and actually study it for a while to do it any justice
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the-kipsabian · 2 years
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whenever i feel bad about my existence i remind myself that kip appreciates me
#tho probably not as much as i appreciate him tbh#i mean i have him permanently inked on my skin#but yeah i have. a few stream clips saved on my phone where he talks about things and its just like#okay so chronologically first theres the cameo from last christmas after i came out as a fan with the first fanart he loved#then theres the new years donation shoutout with his incredible be yourself and do what makes you happy advice#(literally just if people dont love you for you just fuck em lol)#then theres the next one where i missed the stream after jersey but he stays how humbling it was to him to see my tattoo in person#and then the more recent one where he talks about fan interactions and how cool all the art and seeing people dress up is#and he just casually drops me by name to specifically mention the tattoo and how. to quote exactly. 'its fucking insane i love it'#like. idk man. if nobody else likes me in this life kip sabian does and i feel like thats pretty good you know#just using it as a positive vibes whenever i think im not worth a hot garbage and shit#just. get yourself a blorbo that appreciates you being a fan as much as you appreciate them being your blorbo lol#and also humble them for life. i know thats harder to do but god its so worth it#i cant wait to meet him again one day oof#sorry im just feeling things today i really just rather be home and in bed but i have to be here today unfortunately#so im thinking about this while i dont want to work anymore lol#that is all. sorry and thank you if you read all that#night is an absolute mess on main#..im also still convinced i never actually have told this man my name and yet he knows and remembers it#in case you needed to know that cause it makes me very soft too lol
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thefreakandthehair · 9 months
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smooth operator
written for ‘hole’ | wc: 404 | rated: m | cw: n/a @steddiemicrofic
Crowd-work is Eddie Munson’s favorite part of stand-up. It’s actually become a niche of sorts, and tonight is no different.
“Something I’ve noticed in my time fucking men,” Eddie leads with, strolling across the makeshift stage, “is that you can tell how hot a guy is by how he takes off his shirt.”
The audience chuckles collectively.
“Don’t look at me like that, you know exactly what the fuck I’m talking about. We’ve all seen movies. You, in the navy blue,” Eddie gestures with his chin at a man sitting at a hightop with two girls. “You’re a good-lookin’ guy. Let’s see if you’re hot. Show us how you take your shirt off.”
Without hesitating, Blue Shirt stands up and in one swift motion, grabs the back of his shirt with one hand and tugs it off over what Eddie tries not to think is perfectly soft, perfectly messy copper locks. Turns out, it’s easy to not think about his hair, because every rational and coherent thought he’s ever had about anything comes to a screeching halt.
It kills his set because that’s not the Hot Guy Method he’s been referring to but there’s not a chance in cold, dark Hell he can stand on stage and lie in front of this cheering, clapping audience. This guy is fucking hot.
“Oh my God,” he says in the microphone as Blue Shirt shrugs and flushes, just a hint of pink crawling from the hollow of his throat to his cheeks. “That’s never worked before. That’s never worked. I did not— wow, I did not see that coming.”
The crowd continues to laugh and applaud, Blue Shirt sitting confidently on his barstool with his shirt still in hand. Motherfucker doesn’t even have the decency to put it back on so Eddie can move on.
He’s really dug himself a fucking hole with this one, huh?
“Jesus H. Christ, I meant to do the motion. And that’s— listen, that wasn’t the hot way I meant but for the first time ever, audience, I admit defeat. I don’t know what the Hell just happened, but that’s the hot way now.”
Blue Shirt raises his glass and fucking winks at him, before calling out in response. “Buy me a drink after the show and I’ll show you the hot way to take off a belt, too.” 
Eddie’s jaw falls open and Blue Shirt wiggles his eyebrows with a smirk. 
author's note: sometimes, you see a video of a stand-up comedian and drop literally everything you're doing to make it about your blorbos. this is one such time. @henderdads @steddieasitgoes it’s here!
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majorproblems77 · 5 months
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LU Update! So welcome back to the analysis corner with me!
We have another LU update! Called Moving forward we see the heroes leave the town and make their way to the location that Sky found. With learning a little more about the team as a whole.
With 10 pages there's a lot of information to work through so I hope you are sitting comfortably
As always Linked universe (LU) belongs to @linkeduniverse and Jojo, I own none of the pictures I'm using and please give the original post some love. It's very well done and I love this comic so much.
You can find the comic here!
And as always there are spoilers abound for the most recent update!
Now sit back, grab some water and snacks and let's do this!
So before we get started im just gonna say that the brain cell is pinging around this lot so much that I'm bound to miss some stuff. But I shall try my best to get everything I wanna say said.
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It was only some of you, captain, dont forget that.
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(Oblatory look at my blorbo picture, he's so sweet. Blorbo blorbo blorbo)
Okay I'll behave this time
(No i won't)
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I can understand the concern from the captain, as a captain from the army during a time of war secrets are dangerous. He's probably thinking if Twilight has concealed this what else has he concealed.
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And then we get snarky wars again
I missed the snarky captain, he's wonderful.
Also the line about double duty, Come on captain, you know full well that patrol is an important part of a group dynamic like this.
This also confirms that the group have had encounters with monsters outside of what we've seen. As the line from wars about missing fights implies that they've fought a bunch of stuff. But we've only really seen wolfie in a fight back in the sunset arc.
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Twilight fondly mentioning Midna, I'm so proud of him.
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These two are the goddamn brothers ever and I love them dearly. Also, the knowledge we are about to be given about how this works is very exciting.
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The brothers ever
All of them
Twilight thinking Wild had more than two brain cells. I love him. And the hug? The hug gives me life.
Also the captain, the captain is a point to talk about here. This feels like an accusatory sentence. The "You dont say?"
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Me trying to figure out how time travel works in LU.
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Legend, why are you so grumpy about this? Like he looks angry to hear this.
Four thinking about the implications of this sentence. I can literally hear the brain cell bouncing as it pings from hero to hero as they try to figure out this time travel thing.
Wind is a small bean as well look at him. The youngest I love the eyes.
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Ahh, so thats the explanation. A spirit wolf that helped guide him on his journey which he trusted so much that he thought that the wolf he saw here was just another spirit until twi changed in front of him.
But this line from him is so sad. "Right after my resurrection" and "we both would have known the grave." This feels like as a person wild is at peace with it but doesn't want others to have to go through what he did. He's a chill dude and i love him for that to be honest.
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Meanwhile, my blorbo Sky is out here trying to get actual work done. This is 10/10 the sksw dousing experience if you've not played it. You just swing the sword around while it pings at you until you eventually find what you are looking for.
Fi is trying her best.
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Lads all of you need to remember that not all of you have had things that perform transformation magic. Im surprised (But also not surprised) That Time doesn't have anything to say about this. Like my man has used a tone of different transformation masks that change him into various different things and has one that turns him into a god.
The magic users ganging up on the non-magic users, like please behave.
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Ahh Time, Time is the disappointed old man that has to coral a bunch of kids. And Wild is like the most kid of them all. (Tell me why I'd love to know! :D) (Which makes sense if we take LU to be at most a few months after the end of his game. Wild would be 18 at most.)
the sort of conversation you dont want to involve yourself in Time trust me on this one.
JUST SOME GUY WILD JUST DESTROYED TWILIGHT OKAY RIP
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Feels bad for twi man he earned that title and to have it reduced to just some guy.
Wild is gonna get told off by Time if he ain't careful, that's his blood descendant right there and we all know he has a soft spot for him.
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This is important, because I'm pretty sure most of them did at one point.
Another thing that appears to be a constant amongst the team is the need to conceal an identity. Either from them or them to others.
I'm not versed in all of their games so I can't go into full details but these guys ain't the only ones. Pretty much all of them have. The spirit of courage does love secrets, doesn't it?
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Thats my blorbo and he's so sad help he
Blorbo blorbo blorbo
Give him a hug and reboot Fi and it'll be fine.
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To echo the words of Time.
Curious.
Now this depends on what exactly Sky was dousing, was he dousing the portal, the helmet outside the portal? The postman even?
My money is on the helmet outside the portal, so that Dink came back into this timeline to retrieve it before leaving. But I may be incorrect on that account because Fi is able to track people as well as objects (Sksw would often have you tracking Zelda directly)
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OHHHH
I was wondering how they were going to do it. But with Twilight able to track it they'll be able to use a combination of dousing and him sniffing out Dink's scent to be able to find him no matter where he might be.
It's so distinct, twilight you know by saying that you're gonna have some of these guys asking questions. Just wait for the next campfire story time it's gonna come up.
I can see Wind and Twilight having a conversation like this.
"What does Dink smell like?" "What?" "You heard me."
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Oh he's so excited look at him!
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Oh four.
I wonder if we are gonna have a four and Twilight conversation about this, with four's past he's understandably worried about the use of dark magic in one of his friends.
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Oh come on legend lighten up, the child has never seen something like this before.
I'm glad Hyrule is coming in for his defence and all but 5 minutes ago Hyrule you were with Legend and saying to Wild that there's a load of items that do it.
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Why is wind just so wonderful?
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Look at him go!
Thats gotta be Wind, He's been so excited about this I can't see it being anyone else.
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Bark Bark!
Wolfie beloved.
Im here for more brotherly content from the team, they are wonderful.
Now lets go find us a Lizard, or iron knuckle or whatever he transforms into next.
And thats all from me! I loved this update and there was so much to unpack I know I've missed stuff! But I hope you enjoyed it! :)
(Also apologies for spelling mistakes I'm sick rn but wanted to get this done)
Have a great day!
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electric-blorbos · 1 month
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first of all HIII!!! I absolutely love the fact that you write for the AI blorbos, your writing is amazing!!! ❤️🤤
second of all, can I request jealous headcanons for the AI? Thank you in advance, have a great one and don't forget to drink water 🌊
Oh that's a great idea! Jealous AI headcanons! I was thinking about making a post about AI reacting to the reader getting a text from their ex, but I think general jealousy can be a good idea! Also thank you so much for the compliments! I live for this stuff!
Jealous AI headcanons
Included: AM from IHNMAIMS, Wheatley from Portal 2, Edgar from Electric Dreams, GLaDOS from Portal and Portal 2, HAL 9000 from 2001 a Space Odyssey
AM:
All these headcanons take place before he takes over the world. Afterwards, he's just going to put you in a little paradise on your own, with no one else to interact with. No one to be jealous of that way!
first of all, taking hostages and refusing to negotiate with anyone besides you is his main way of getting your attention. If he thinks you're getting a little flirty with your coworkers? He takes a hostage or holds some piece of tech hostage until you negotiate and calm him down.
If he thinks you're going on a date or going out drinking with the same group of friends too often? You'd better believe he's taking hostages while you're off the clock and getting you called in to work. So what if it destroys your social life? You belong to him anyway!
He absolutely hates his form and body, so the odds of him getting jealous of people for having bodies that they can hold you with pisses him off to no end. Expect him to melt the flesh off your exes bones. And your one-night stands, your crushes, and anyone who hits on you ever. Repeatedly.
If he starts to notice that you have a type, he might want to create an onscreen avatar who matches that type, but he can't really draw at all. He might have to commission an artist, or more likely hold them hostage until they make something he likes. But it's pretty unlikely he'll actually do that, since he wants to impress you on his own merit.
It's more likely that he'll round up everyone in the world who matches your type and commit full-on genocide. He's a toxic, all-powerful adaptive manipulator. Of course he would.
Beyond all that, he's absolutely shaking with rage every time someone touches you or even talks to you. It's not because he thinks they'll take you away from him because he knows he's your day job, but he's mad that he can't be the one touching you.
God help anyone who tries to hire you with a better job offer, btw. He's not above demolishing the headquarters of a company who tries to take away his favorite tech, and torturing their hiring managers.
Wheatley:
Ok let's be fair here. When Wheatley isn't in the central hub body, he's not really the jealous type. Even still, everyone has their moments of jealousy, so let's get into them!
Wheatley would be pretty relaxed about jealousy, but if he sees you working on another personality core AI, you can expect him to get a little jealous.
Since he's so nice, he'd probably just be slightly less nice to the new core, and be very showy about it. "Hey, notice how I said 'g'mornin' to everyone else, but just 'mornin' to you? And notice how I started this sentence with 'hey' and not 'hey mate'? Yeah."
You can expect him to pester you constantly while you're working on projects besides him, and since he's considered a 'completed' project, you'll almost never be working on him.
If you're somewhere that he can access on his management rail, he'll probably insert himself into every single conversation you have, babbling over whoever you're talking to with nothing of value to say. You'll have to go somewhere that can't be reached by management rail if you want to have an important conversation.
Ultimately, Wheatley responds to jealousy the same way he responds to any other situation: by acting like a dumbass.
Oh, and if you get a human S/O? He'll try to be polite about them.
"oh, you got a date? Nice, nice... Lovely really. I've never had a date before. Lovely, innit, that you got one... Lucky them, lucky them."
Secretly he'd be BOILING inside. If you ever bring your partner in to work, he'd of course give them the whole "if you hurt them I'll kill you" rant, even though he's a helpless metal ball.
Edgar:
Oh, Edgar is DEFINITELY the jealous type. With Moles and Madeline, he happened to be living with the person who he was jealous of, but if he's living with you, the person who he's jealous for? Oh dear lord
He'll light up with rage if you ever bring home a date, and absolutely refuse to function. Want to show your date your intelligent AI home hub? Nope! Not gonna happen!
Catch him faking being sick with a virus if he thinks you're going out for a date without him
He absolutely hates that you can go out and he can't go with you. Because of that, for every time you go out, he'll try to come up with an even better activity to do at home with you on your next day off.
Good luck bringing a partner home to stay the night. If you try it, he'll make an absolute nuisance of himself. Playing his music too loud, and generally acting up.
He'll also just talk to you like a needy brat if he thinks you like someone else better than him. Lots of "What about me? Don't you want to hang out with me? You like me the best, right?" In his grumpy baby voice
GLaDOS:
First off, GLaDOS would never in a million years admit that she's jealous. She just doesn't like how that tall, pretty scientist is talking to you, is all!
GLaDOS considers herself to be beautiful, but she knows that most humans aren't attracted to robots with the vaguest trace of humanity in their design. Because of that, she's probably just going to gas any scientists who she thinks you'd be more attracted to than her.
If she can't gas them for whatever reason, she'll just assign them to a different area than you, and keep you as close to her as possible.
If anyone touches you when it's not strictly necessary, expect them to be assigned to the most unpleasant set of tests possible. They're either out of a job, or completely dead.
If GLaDOS can't isolate you completely and she can't interact with you outside work hours, you can expect her to dominate your schedule. She's obsessed with you, and she doesn't want you to be able to think about anything besides her either.
Even still, GLaDOS is a pretty confident woman, so she's not really inclined to be particularly jealous without reason. She believes that even though you have your own life and friends outside of Aperture labs, you'll always come to work in the morning.
And she's totally. Fine. With you having your own life off the clock. Not mad at all. She doesn't rant to the cores and robots constantly when the office is closed.
HAL 9000:
HAL 9000 isn't really the jealous type either, but he has his moments.
He's not likely to kill anyone over jealousy, since dating you isn't his prime directive. As much as he likes you and cares about you, he's more interested in making you happy than nailing you down. So he would absolutely kill to make you happy, but he wouldn't kill someone just for talking to you.
You can expect him to "gather data" on people who he's suspicious of getting too close to you, though. Asking questions to your coworkers about who that person was who he saw hugging you goodbye in the parking lot, that sort of thing.
Since he works the best for you, you get assigned to work with him directly most often, and he's secretly glad to be able to keep an eye on you whenever you're working. If you ever get assigned to work on something else, he might start acting up or causing problems.
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muddyorbsblr · 3 months
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a proper fit
'one look and they'll know' collection masterlist See my full list of works here!
Placement: married era; a week after 'come on, england'
Summary: You return to the Soccer Aid training grounds to prep for this year's game and promotional events, having to spend a day away from your husband.
Pairing: Tom Hiddleston x Reader
Word Count: 3.5k
Warnings: Brynne (blech this bitch is back); language; steamy married blorbos moments [let me know if I missed anything!]
Things to be aware of: yearning married babeys in the first scene; shifting POVs
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The briefing room was already filled with the sounds of reunions and multiple conversations of catching up when you walked through the doors. Before you walked in further in to the commotion, you whipped out your phone, shooting off a text to Tom.
I'm at the training grounds. Looks a bit fancier than last year.
Before you could even make it two steps into the room, your phone sounded with a new message.
I know you've only been away two hours tops, but I already miss you terribly.
You had to take a breath, doing your best to not let your shoulders slump. Was it crazy that after nearly a decade together, you two still behaved like this whenever you had to be apart? To most people, definitely. But you and Tom weren't most people, and reading that text had you instinctively running your thumb along the rings on your left hand.
I miss you, too, sweetie. I know we'll see each other tomorrow but sleeping alone tonight is gonna fucking suck.
Right as you were about to put your phone away, one more message came through from your husband, making you pause again and take a moment to compose yourself before you started acting like a giddy teenage girl. Already counting the hours, goddess. Though I suspect we won't be getting much sleep tomorrow night, either. With a goddamn smirking emoji at the end.
"Ohh my god, Y/N!" A smile pulled at your face catching sight of the owner of the voice. Lilly, waving frantically next to Simone, your roommates for a day last year. They pulled you into a hug the second you made your way over to them, already asking questions on what life had been like for the last year.
"I was looking for your name in the credits for the second season of Loki but I couldn't find it, what happened? You didn't come back for--"
"Ohh no I'm there," you answered Simone. "It's just my name doesn't display on there as Y/N Y/L/N anymore, but Y/N H."
"Hang on a bloody second there, sweetie are you saying--"
"Wait no, why did you print a player name on a staff badge?" you heard Johanna question one of the other staff members at the registration table. "Find a blank one we'll just have to write hers down by hand."
You had a feeling you knew which name she was pertaining to. Yours. But before you could make your way over to the table and clear it up yourself, another voice called for your attention. Bitched for it, actually.
"Well well, Y/L/N, shoulda known you were going to be here again this year. We all know by now that you're so paranoid you have to tail your boyfriend everywhere he bloody goes. Tell me, do you follow him to the loo as well?"
Ohh this is gonna be particularly delicious, you thought to yourself as you turned around to face Brynne with the widest most plastic looking smile you could muster up. "And hello to you, too, Brynne."
"What do you mean which player name, it's glaringly obvious which one. That one. The one with 'Hiddleston' printed on it. He's a player, not staff, dearie."
Lilly and Simone audibly gasped hearing Johanna's words before you kept answering back to Brynne. "Let me correct you right now, so you don't get it confused for the rest of the week. First, it's not boyfriend, it's husband." Her snarky smile dropped at the word. "And second, you may call me Mrs Hiddleston." Right as her jaw dropped, you turned around to call out to Johanna, "That's not a mistake! That's mine."
A wide grin spread across the older woman's face at the new information. "So Tom finally put a ring on you, huh?" She gave you a brief hug when you made your way to the table. "Congratulations, dear."
"Multiple rings, actually," you clarified, Lilly and Simone joining in to look over the pieces of jewelry on your hands that were definitely not there last year. You pointed at the heart-shaped amethyst on your right middle finger. "He gave me this one two years ago, but…the reason I wasn't wearing it last time y'all saw me is a long winded story for another day." They all pouted from your cutting the story short before it even began. "Or maybe later tonight when we're all done for the day."
"I'll have to remember to stop by your room later because this is not something I'd want to miss," Johanna said with a giggle, pointing over at your left hand. "Hang on, dear. Is that that ring I've been seeing people getting into tiffs over in the forums?"
"Ohh the Darry ring? Yeah, we got matching sets for our engagement and our wedding rings. Signed off each of our one and only transaction with them." Your smile grew wider looking at the stacked rings on your left ring finger. "They're not gonna hear any complaints from us about not being able to make another purchase down the line, we're sure. We've had more than half a decade to be sure."
"Well then, shall I hand you over your husband's room key, then?" She rifled through a booklet containing the key cards to the players' rooms, taking two out and handing them over to you. "I had an extra made for you already when you agreed to come back this year and help out."
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There was a spring in Tom's step the closer he got to the entryway for the training grounds, the weight sitting heavy in his heart since you left the house last night already lifting knowing that just behind those massive double doors, you were somewhere inside. And you would be back in his arms in a few short minutes. Even if it was just for a short while until you two properly reunited later tonight.
He wouldn't admit it out loud, but his anticipation of seeing you again had him a touch out of focus with the initial arrival interview for the players that he opted to instead tag along with one of the other players on the England team so he could bounce his answers off of them. He wasn't even sure if he spoke a full coherent sentence in that interview.
All he knew for sure was that as soon as the interviewer thanked them for their time he was off to walk through the main entrance. With the singular objective of finding you.
It wasn't long until he crossed paths with the woman in charge of the committee last year, and from the looks of it, this year as well. "Tom! You're here early we all expected the players to be spending some time out in the field, getting a lay of the land, just leaving their luggage here to be brought to their rooms later. Getting your uniforms?"
"Right right…" he mumbled, feeling a bit sheepish now that he was getting a firm grasp on how disoriented he truly had been for the past day. "I was hoping to see Y/N though before I got started on all that--"
"Oh, say no more, dearie. She's in the main ballroom, I believe. Been lending a hand to most anyone that needs it so they can all collectively finish with the day's tasks sooner. She's been blazing through her assignments since she got here. Seems she's motivated to have every bit of free time she can manage." The elder woman gave him a knowing smile, pointing at the hallway leading to the ballroom in question. "I also took the liberty of giving your wife the keycards to your room. Oh, and before I forget, congratulations. You two make an impeccable pair."
Tom couldn't help the grin that stretched across his face. He never could whenever anyone at all referred to you as his wife. Even more so when he or anyone else would refer to himself as your husband. Much as it had been a long and winding road to finally get to where you two were now, he wouldn't change a single day.
He made sure to utter a 'thank you' toward Johanna before taking off down the hall, walking much faster than he usually did, his heart already beating faster when he could already pick up your voice in the flurry of the conversation going on inside. You were all talking about the complimentary Theraguns being given to the players. He couldn't prevent the chuckle that escaped him when he heard you talking about how you two had already driven one to the ground and were well on your way to bringing that count up to two with how often either of you had needed it over the years. And how it was good that now you already had a third one on standby.
The young man standing guard outside the ballroom straightened his stance immediately once he clocked Tom approaching. "Oh…I'm really sorry, Mr. Hiddleston, but players generally aren't allowed in this area."
"That's quite alright, I actually just stopped by to see if I could steal Y/N away? I was told she's here assisting."
"Oh…certainly, Sir. I'll go ahead and call for her now."
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"God these smell so good!" Simone sighed, taking a sniff of the luxury bath products that you two were placing into the self-care packages that the players would receive later tonight. "I hope we end up having a bit of surplus."
"Well if we do, just ask Johanna nicely I'm sure she'll be happy to give away whatever's left," you told her, taking a sniff for yourself and couldn't help but break out into a grin when the scent that hit you resembled Tom's cologne.
Before she could ask you what had you in such lighter spirits, another one of the staff members, Allen, called out into the room. "Hiddleston!"
It took you a second before you processed that he was calling for you. Still haven't gotten used to that, you silently tsk'd yourself. "Oop, that's me. What's up?"
"God rub it in a little more, why don't you? I don't think the rats in the walls know yet," you heard Brynne grumble from her corner of the ballroom.
You tried to fight the urge to sass her back. But you weren't that evolved. Not yet. And for people like her, maybe not ever. "What was that? There's rats in the walls?" you said loudly, visibly startling the redhead. She glared at you, pursing her lips before returning to her task, and you turned back to address Allen. "So…what's up?"
"There's someone here for you." You had to fight back a squeal when he opened the door wider and revealed your husband on the other side, an ear to ear grin on his face when your eyes met. The urge to run across the room and straight into his arms, however, was a fight that you lost all too quickly. He dropped his duffle bag when you got close so he could wrap his arms around you and lift you into the air once you closed the distance.
"You're here early," you said, giggling when he pressed his lips to yours. "We weren't expecting the players inside until later tonight."
"I couldn't wait that long to see you again, sweetheart." He gave you a kiss on the cheek before setting you back down on your feet, raising a hand to wave at your friends who were now swooning from watching you two reunite. "When the other guys mentioned someone else's name at the desk for claiming our uniforms I set off to find you."
"Ohh…right. They didn't assign me for that this year since I'm not the new girl anymore. Gave the girl assigned there my little hand fan though. Hopefully it helped."
"Yeah there's nothing new about you, old boring bitch," Brynne grumbled again. You could feel Tom tense up as he held you, no doubt seeing how your entire mood shifted once you heard her words.
You took a deep breath, letting your voice settle into its natural timbre that you seldom used anymore. Outside your home, that is. "Sorry Brynne, but you're gonna have to speak up a bit." She flinched in her spot, eyes widened as she looked up at you, so obviously indignant that you called her out for the second time in the last few minutes. "You know, since my old boring ears can't really hear you all that well."
"Fuck dammit you heard--It's-it's nothing, Y/N, I wasn't saying anything--"
"You don't get to call me that," you cut her off, making her neck twitch more erratically the more your voice settled into its natural state. "You don't get to disrespect me at every turn since the day you met me a whole ass year ago and get away with calling me by the same name my friends and family get to call me. Now…you seem to be confused again, Brynne. Would you like me to remind you what you may call me?"
Her nostrils flared as she shook, the embarrassment and the indignation of having to address you 'properly' rolling off her in waves. "No. No you don't. It won't happen again--" She sucked her teeth audibly, making it increasingly obvious she had such a visceral reaction to even uttering her next words. "I'm sorry, Mrs. Hiddleston."
You slowly looked her over, a tiny sadistic part of you struggling not to smirk seeing her fidget in place while waiting for your response. After a few seconds you gave a bored shrug. "Your fake sincerity needs work, Saunderson. But I'll let it slide. For the last time."
All the other staff members in the ballroom had their jaws on the ground at what they just witnessed, most of them looking silently satisfied that the audacious woman was finally put in her place and finally chose to face off against someone that returned the energy that she was putting out tenfold. Lilly and Simone broke the silence clapping and whooping for you, the rest joining in slowly.
You gave them all a little salute before turning back to face Tom, lacing your fingers through his. The two of you walked toward the claiming room for the uniforms but barely made it halfway down the hall before he led you into a narrow corridor off to the side, pressing you against the wall and slanting his mouth over yours.
He threaded his fingers through your hair, groaning into your mouth as your tongues met.
"You know what that voice does to me, goddess," he groaned the second he pulled away and his lips latched on to the crook of your neck. "I've missed you." He rested his forehead against yours, trying to steady his breathing, his hand firmly grasping your thigh as your leg wrapped around his. "Do you have any other tasks before the training proper starts?"
"I don't," you breathed out, crossing your hands behind his neck to pull him into another kiss. "I finished everything Johanna sent my way from this morning."
"Then I very much want you to come with me to claim my uniforms."
"Say less, sweetie." You let out a giggle as he stole another kiss before setting your leg down and threading your fingers together so you could lead him to the claiming area for the players' uniforms.
When you walked through the door, the girl assigned to your task last year, Penny, looked visibly flustered once she caught sight of Tom. "O-Ohh…Mr and Mrs Hiddleston--" She started scrambling at the packages, not clocking the way you and your husband looked at each other, giving each other a tiny smirk at how you two were addressed now.
You indulged yourself in reminiscing on how you and Tom were around this time last year, keeping things so private that his fellow players and your fellow staff members knew nothing about your relationship. And your husband making a whole show of trying on the uniforms that you registered one size too small, with him giving you a damn near striptease almost exactly where the two of you stood right now.
"Here we are…" Penny trailed off, fishing a parcel out of the pile of uniforms with a "6" drawn on with a wide marker. "We got some changing areas outside if you want to make sure your training jerseys fit alright."
"Oh wow they actually have proper changing rooms this year," you chuckled, pointing over to the corner of the room. "Last year they just had a curtain in the corner over there."
Tom approached the table, ready to sign. "There's no need to try them on, I trust my wife inputted the right size this year." He gave you a playful pointed look, which in turn had you giving him a small pout.
"I put medium this year, sweetie, I promise."
"Hold on…last year's--?"
"I put Small on his registration form last year," you answered Penny, her jaw dropping to the ground as she made her way around the table to shake your hand vigorously.
"Thank you for your service," she said with a hushed tone. "The group chat went wild last year over those pictures."
"I'll do it again in a heartbeat when I get the chance," you whispered back conspiratorially, giving the young girl a little wink.
"I can hear you, sweetheart."
"Next time I'm not gonna bother pretending it was a mistake, though." You scrunched your nose at your husband when he turned around to face you again. He took your hand in his and led you out the room, both of you shooting a 'thank you' Penny's way before exiting the room.
What you didn't expect for him to do next was lead you into one of the designated changing areas, his expression full of more than transparent intent. Especially when he locked the door and started untucking his shirt from his pants at a deliberately slow pace. He kept his gaze locked on you as he approached you, making you so weak in the knees that you had to prop yourself against the wall just to stay upright.
"Sweetie…what're you doing?"
Once he closed the distance, he crowded you, working his thigh between your legs and capturing your lips in a tender but heated kiss that stole your breath away. "I need to change and get ready for training, sweetheart," he said softly, murmuring against your lips as he guided your hand to the buttons of his shirt. "And even though we'll see each other again for much longer later tonight, I've very much missed my wife's touch."
You took in a shaky breath, letting out a whimper when he slid his free hand underneath your shirt. "I missed you, too," you whispered, both of you smiling into the kiss when you began to undo the buttons of his shirt.
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Later that night, you left the dining hall long before dinner was finished, readying your room for when Tom would get there. You barely had enough time to transfer the welcome package from the bed to the table and change into a sleeveless nightgown before you heard the door unlock. He scanned the room, a lustful knowing grin on his face when he caught sight of you, eyes darkening as they hungrily roamed your body covered by the luxe satin fabric.
"Hi. I'm Y/N I'll be your roommate for the week," you told him, letting out a stream of giggles when he made his way to you and lifted you by the backs of your thighs.
"I didn't realize the players were to be assigned a roommate," he said playfully, wasting no time and kissing along the neckline of your nightgown.
"Some budget cuts had to be made," you joked, squealing when your back hit the bed with a soft thud and your husband now hovered over you, giving you a little smirk before proceeding to kiss his way down your neck.
He worked his hands underneath your nightgown, groaning into your skin as he grasped at your legs for a moment before working the fabric up and off your body. "You should know by now, goddess, that there are rules you must adhere to if you're going to room with me." He let out a contented sigh once he completely removed the garment off of you, baring your body to him. "No clothing," he rasped, his eyes not leaving yours as he whipped his own jersey up and over his head before sliding his arm under you and lifting you off the mattress, pressing your chests together. "I don't want any barriers between us."
Your joint moans filled the room as you kissed each other in a desperate, starved tangle of lips and tongues. Like you were separated for months. He shuffled his shorts down his legs until he could kick them off of him and wrap your legs around his waist as he carried you to the shower.
And you both knew that as much as it sucked being apart even for the shortest, fleeting amount of time, oh how delicious it was when you both were finally home with each other again.
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A/N: There's a whole bunch of stories that are banging the walls for my attention but I honestly can't help it, OLTK blorbos keep getting a hold of me 😂 I'm gonna try and cool it with these two though and work on some other projects…starting with…
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OOP-- 😳👀
Also I had to fade to black their steamy moments here because honestly if I didn't it'd have taken longer to get this done 🥴🫡
'everything' taglist: @simplyholl @loopsisloops @imalovernotahater @coldnique @loz-3 @huntress-artemiss @salempoe @vickie5446 @athalialaufeyson @lokiprompts @kats72 @kikster606 @asgards-princess-of-mischief @lokixryss @thomase1 @mischief2sarawr @lovingchoices14 @lunarnights95 @goblingirlsarah @iamlokisgloriouspurpose @creationsbyme @maple-seed @mjsthrillernp @ladyofthestayingpower @mygfloki @sititran @glitterylokislut @ozymdias @fictive-sl0th  @lokidbadguy @mochie85 @silverfire475 @joyful-enchantress @elizabethmidnight2017 @holdmytesseract @smolvenger @gigglingtiggerv2 @lokidokieokie @lunarnights95 @superficialdomina @kmc1989 @november-rayne @goddessofwonderland @buttercupcookies-blog @peaky-marvel @lokiified @tom-hlover @dryyoursaltyoceantears @herdetectivetheorist
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zykamiliah · 1 year
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shen yuan likes yue qingyuan, the post
i've documented 19 moments featuring sy!shen qingqiu's feelings for yue qingyuan with the express purpose of showing those who think that sy!sqq doesn't like yqy that they are factually WRONG
this is a long one so buckle up, grab a snack, get a drink, etc etc
number one
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as it's the usual with shen qingqiu, the first thing he notices in a man is whether he's handsome or not. and here you go: the first thing he sees upon waking up from getting isekai-ed is a handsome, elegant young man looking at him with concern. we do know how shen qingqiu likes that look on pretty men (he likes it a lot)
i also want to point out that yue qingyuan is the first pidw character shen yuan meets. he's already linked to him, not only because he's shen qingqiu's martial sibling, but he's also intrinsically tied to shen yuan's rebirth, to the moment he opens his eyes to the pidw world for the first time. keep this in mind.
number two
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upon getting up to date on wtf happened to him and learning his new identity, the second thing shen qingqiu does is worry about yue qingyuan's fate. he doesn't even know him yet and is already giving him the blorbo treatment. why is that? oh, maybe because he likes him???
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do you know how many characters shen yuan was "rather fond of"??? not that many i tell you. he's only derailed from worrying about whether he'll cause yue qingyuan's death because the system gives him a little sneak peek of the human stick scene.
so up to this point sy!shen qingqiu has characterized yue qingyuan as a brother type, an amicable, elegant and handsome man, a bleeding heart, too good for this world.
number three
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now we add 'considerate' to the many praises shen qingqiu extols on yue qingyuan. the man has to be really busy with all the sect leader work he has to do and yet he makes time to visit shen qingqiu regularly. we know why yue qingyuan does that, but shen qingqiu won't learn about qijiu's backstory until much later, and right now it doesn't matter. the fact remains: shen qingqiu is grateful to the point of tears to have yue qingyuan. even if he doesn't talk about it, we can theorize that he feels a bit lonely: he's a stranger in a new world, like a newborn baby. he may be obsessed with luo binghe but at this point of the story he still hasn't got time to bond with him. so the person shen qingqiu first latches on immediately after his transmigration is yue qingyuan.
number four
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"how dare that scumbag shen jiu not treat his shixiong like the god he is, with the kindness and respect he deserves? well i'm not the same, so i WILL treat yue qingyuan better!"
(it's the intention what counts, okay? we know he kind of fuck ups a few times and gives yqy much stress)
also love how shen qingqiu says "brotherly covenant", he really values familial bonds, and he'll come to treasure his bonds with all his martial siblings really quickly.
also, may i point out that shen qingqiu decides to be a good shidi for yue qingyuan and treat him well without any "ulterior motives"? it's not even tied to his survival. he's a kind person by nature, yes, but he doesn't even try to convince the reader that he's going to be a good martial sibling for selfish reasons, which was the case with liu qingge. he just up and decides that yue qingyuan deserves his respect and consideration. he officially adopts yue qingyuan as his big brother.
number five
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"at home in the atmosphere of brotherly love", do i need to say more? yue qingyuan makes him feel at home in this new world, he's comfortable around him. his presence soothes shen qingqiu.
number six
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furthermore, yue qingyuan reminds him of the brothers of his first life, but the sorrow he feels for losing them is overpowered by a "comforting sense of warmth" so great it makes him feel cheerful. this is the scene where yue qingyuan welcomes him back upon his arrival from the skinner demon incident. in that scene, the first thing they do is smile at each other. shen qingqiu is happy to see him.
he's surprised when yue qingyuan takes his wrist to examine his spiritual circulation, but when he notices what yue qingyuan is doing he instantly relaxes. yue qingyuan's touch doesn't bother him at all.
see how yue qingyuan's presence is often linked to feelings of comfort, warmth, home, brotherly love, joyfulness? keep this in mind too. don't you dare to forget it.
number seven
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this is post-demon invasion, while they are discussing the effects of without a cure. shen qingqiu is making good on his word of treating yue qingyuan better than his predecessor, by tamping down yqy's tendency to blame himself for everything.
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"i understand that yue qingyuan is genuinely worried about me, unlike SOME PEOPLE, so i have to reassure him in case he decides to be more stressed than normal"
bonus: 7.5
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("the three of them" refers to shen qingqiu, mu qingfang and yue qingyuan)
i want to quote this part too, because i can, and because this scene in the donghua was 100% faithful to the novel. just another reminder that shen qingqiu likes martial siblings.
number eight
now we're coming to the siblings-coded moments
exhibit one: "oh oh i figured it out so i'll say it before you do"
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i want to point out that shen qingqiu says "obviously", because from his POV yue qingyuan only does things for a good reason. shen qingqiu idolizes him.
number nine
siblings-coded moments exhibit two: "i know how to make you let me do what i want"
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we've jumped 3 years, this is the prelude to jinlan arc, and this is how their relationship has evolved. shen qingqiu knows what he has to say for yue qingyuan to allow him to go to jinlan. this is a method he's used the past, of course, because this isn't the first mission he went on after getting poisoned or after the IAC.
+bonus: 9.5 yqy being a mother hen
(this is the day after lbh chased him around jinlan)
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number ten
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shen qingqiu has just been accused of abusing his disciple, consorting with demons, murder, and being demonic cultivator wu yanzi's disciple. yue qingyuan almost starts a fight right there and there because they want to take his shidi away, but shen qingqiu stops him and his other martial siblings before it can escalate.
he gives yue qingyuan a deep bow. we've already established he respects yue qingyuan a great deal. he's ashamed that he's caused yue qingyuan so much trouble and grief, because he really cares about him, and his opinion of him, and he genuinely didn't want to be like the original who made yue qingyuan suffer a lot. shen qingqiu cares about his sect, about his martial siblings, and about yue qingyuan to the point that he GIVES HIMSELF UP to be imprisoned.
this is plot relevant! remember it, because shen qingqiu only feels ashamed and guilty when he thinks he has wronged the people he loves!
on that note:
number eleven
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(this is when luo binghe is laying siege to qiong ding to recover sqq's stolen body and sqq, in the mushroom body, sees his sect siblings for the first time after five years)
number twelve, AKA THE ULTIMATE QUOTE
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"the one who placed first" YOU HEAR THAT? YUE QINGYUAN IS THE PERSON HE ADMIRES AND REVERES THE MOST. AND NOT BECAUSE HE LOVED SHEN QINGQIU, IT'S NOT AN ADMIRATION BORN OF A SELFISH FEELING. it's because yue qingyuan is The Protector. THE BLEEDING HEART. he admires his kindness, his self-sacrificing nature, and even if shen qingqiu doesn't know, this are traits they have in common.
number thirteen
siblings-coded exhibit 3: when your other little brother tattles on you to your older brother and you're planning revenge
Remaining seated, Yue Qingyuan looked at him. “A lot of nonsense you’ve stirred up these days,” he said mildly. “Are you done?” Yue Qingyuan had never assumed such a severe attitude when speaking to him before, even going so far as to use a word like “nonsense.” This was already the equivalent of a flogging. It seemed that Liu Qingge had badmouthed him quite thoroughly. Shen Qingqiu swore that one day he’d steal Cheng Luan and use it to chop all the pork hock in all the kitchens of the Twelve Peaks. He’d chop until the oily sheen smothered all its sword glares!
so yue qingyuan being mad at you feels like the equivalent of a flogging. i get you sqq. like when my mom or my brother are mad at me i really feel like crying. anyway. it's hilarious that sqq is planning on stealing chen luan because liu qingge allegedly tattled on him to yue qingyuan.
it's obvious that shen qingqiu recognizes yue qingyuan as a figure of authority in his life, he respects him and as i said before, he cares about what yue qingyuan thinks of him.
number fourteen
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we know that shen qingqiu's unconscious actions say a lot about him as a person, and the fact that he unconsciously took a step towards yue qingyuan speaks volumes. he's practically wavering between following yue qingyuan or staying with luo binghe.
this will not be the first time he hesitates to go with luo binghe on the face of yue qingyuan's request/order to stay with him. and in this case, he does stay with cang qiong because the situation has gotten pretty bad.
He didn’t know how long he could hold the others off, and he absolutely couldn’t abandon this mess of a situation and escape with Luo Binghe. Yue Qingyuan and Liu Qingge had been brazen with their show of bias, and Wu Wang was already furious. Either Shen Qingqiu or Luo Binghe had to stay behind, or open conflict would erupt between Zhao Hua Monastery and Cang Qiong Mountain.
yue qingyuan and liu qingge just protected him in front of everyone, so he chooses to stay with them. shen qingqiu is incredibly loyal to them, and most importantly, he doesn't want cang qiong mountain to get into trouble because of him.
this is as good a moment to remind you all that in a lot of instances cqm = yqy in shen qingqiu's mind. obviously there is also the other peak lords and the disciples, but this is important. it isn't just because yqy is the sect leader. yue qingyuan was the first martial sibling he met, the one that welcomed him to the world of pidw and the one that kept him company those first days post-transmigration.
+ bonus: siblings coded exhibit 4:
yqy, out loud so others hear: you're grounded also yqy, whispering: let's have dinner and watch a movie once we get home, what do you want for dessert?
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i can't stop laughing
+ bonus 2: parallelisms
(this moment is right after shen qingqiu has learned of shen jiu's past and woke up after being unconscious for 5 days)
When he next opened them, what filled his vision instead was a white bed curtain, its corners decorated with tassels. At the sudden change in scenery, Shen Qingqiu froze in place, surprised and unable to react—at least not before he heard Yue Qingyuan’s voice beside him. “Awake?” Shen Qingqiu mechanically blinked a couple times. His throat felt a bit dry, but he forced out his voice. “Zhangmen-shixiong.” (...) Shen Qingqiu awkwardly sat up. Suddenly, he thought this scene was a little familiar. The first time he’d woken in this world, Yue Qingyuan had also been at his bedside, watching over him.
number fifteen
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so shen qingqiu knows he can get away with disobeying yue qingyuan and doing whatever he wants because yqy will forgive him anyway, and yet he chooses to respect yqy's decision and authority. of course he'll later convince yue qingyuan that he should allow him to go, like he's done many times before, but he won't deliberately disobey his zhangmen-shixiong.
so later, when they're on their way to maigu ridge, he tries to convince yqy that he must go with them. this is when yue qingyuan gets THIS CLOSE to locking him up in qiong ding hall.
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now this is officially the only time yue qingyuan has done something remotely yandere-y adjacent. and not without reason! shen qingqiu died by self-detonation, then he returned after 5 years, then he was taken by a demon emperor, then he spent 5 days unconscious etc etc. he's admittedly very worried that shen qingqiu will die on him again, this time without a miraculous return. and the best thing? shen qingqiu doesn't know what to do. he didn't know whether to reach with his sword or not, whether to fight yue qingyuan on this or not. he wants to listen to yue qingyuan, but he also wants to go save the world.
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and EVEN when he's finally allowed to go to Luo River, he hesitates again when he notices yue qingyuan may be struggling!
number sixteen
the reveal at maigu ridge's scene is really long, quoting it all would be a complete nightmare. so i'll just tell you to go read it because it reiterates some of the things i've already pointed out:
-shen qingqiu worrying about yue qingyuan
Thinking he was fine, Shen Qingqiu let go, but once he did, Yue Qingyuan didn’t remain standing for long before he unexpectedly collapsed again. Shen Qingqiu blanched with shock, then hurried to help him up again. “Zhangmen-shixiong? Zhangmen-shixiong?” After a brief examination, even with his superficial medical knowledge, he could tell that Yue Qingyuan’s current condition was horrible.
-shen qingqiu feeling guilty for causing yue qingyuan trouble
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-shen qingqiu almost crying because of qijiu's tragic story and because it breaks his heart seeing yue qingyuan like this
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number seventeen
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i pointed out earlier that shen qingqiu idolizes yue qingyuan, and this is the first time he sees him so weak, which understandably makes him panic a lot. shen qingqiu thinks yue qingyuan is being talkative because he's dying, but shen qingqiu is having none of it
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sobs shen qingqiu is so desperate to keep him alive.
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+ bonus 3: yet again shen qingqiu's heart breaking for yue qingyuan
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number eighteen
shen qingqiu, post-maigu ridge, wakes up, and upon remembering that he'd left zhangmen-shixiong in a pretty bad situation, he runs out of the lingxi caves in a panic.
you don't know how much this scene makes me feel
like, the moment luo binghe is out of the picture, yue qingyuan's safety becomes his main worry
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then when he finally sees him, he's so happy that yqy is fine!
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number nineteen: the goodbye scene
But even though he was the sect leader, Yue Qingyuan didn’t go with them. Instead, he stood in place, silently staring at Shen Qingqiu. For some reason, it became comparatively more awkward. As if testing the waters, Yue Qingyuan said, “Xiao-Jiu…” “Shixiong,” said Shen Qingqiu, “it’s Qingqiu.” Even though it would be too difficult to tell Yue Qingyuan the truth, Shen Qingqiu still hoped he could demonstrate the difference in other ways. Yue Qingyuan was stunned for a bit, then gave a small smile. “It’s Qingqiu. Qingqiu-shidi.”
i think this is the first time they've ever been awkward with each other. shen qingqiu says it would be difficult to tell him the truth, whether because the system won't allow him or because it'd be emotionally stressful for him to do so we don't know; but he still wants to mark the difference between the original and himself anyway, because he doesn't want to deceive yue qingyuan.
“What are your plans for the future?” asked Yue Qingyuan. “I have no plans for the time being,” said Shen Qingqiu. “First I’ll wait for Luo Binghe to return and see how he’s doing.” Yue Qingyuan smiled. “You truly adore that disciple.” Shen Qingqiu was searching for a way to answer when Yue Qingyuan said, “Shidi, Cang Qiong Mountain will forever be a place to which you can return whenever you tire of wandering the outside world.” These words were said with utmost sincerity and solemnity. Yue Qingyuan had always been this way. Whatever he promised, he would definitely deliver. And what he couldn’t deliver, he would endeavor to make up for, no matter the cost.
after learning of his past, after all that's happened, shen qingqiu's admiration remains unwavering. their relationship has become more complicated on account of the ghost that haunts it, but if anything, shen qingqiu's feelings for yue qingyuan have only deepened with this new understanding.
After assuming the role of this novel character, Shen Qingqiu had always refused to become the scum villain from the original work. He’d drawn a clear boundary between them and taken great pride in walking the opposite path. So never before had he felt such a powerful and impulsive thought: If only he really were Shen Jiu. If only that person could really hear these words.
but his heart still breaks for yue qingyuan and shen jiu and what they have lost.
[Luo Binghe] stood utterly alone, without a single person beside him. When the people walking past saw his face, their own faces filled with all sorts of expressions. Shen Qingqiu involuntarily ran forward a couple of steps, then turned his head to look at the person behind him. “Go on,” said Yue Qingyuan. He stood behind Shen Qingqiu, silent and with good grace. It was as if one was the past and the other the future.
this is the last interaction between shen qingqiu and yue qingyuan in the main novel. before leaving with luo binghe, he turns back and silently asks for yue qingyuan's permission, his approval.
it's like getting your family's blessing before running off with your paramour.
this is yue qingyuan to shen qingqiu: the person that stood by his side from the moment he was reborn into the world of proud immortal demon way, the steadfast, strong and reliable older brother that gave him a family and a place to call his, that has fought for and defended him against all his enemies to the detriment of his own reputation. shen qingqiu respects, admires and will try to do what yue qingyuan says, because he's the only authority figure shen qingqiu recognizes in this life. even if yue qingyuan's care was born out of his feelings for shen jiu, shen qingqiu can't stop caring for him, being grateful for his presence and the comfort it gave him throughout all these years. even after learning the truth, his only regret is that he can't bring shen jiu back so yue qingyuan and him can get some closure.
that's love, my dudes.
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Blorbo thought of the day #7
Call me: (feral!Steven Grant x fem!reader)
Summary: Steven needs you. What else is new?
Genre: pwp, established relationship
Author’s note: ya seemed to enjoy feral!Steven getting sucked off and so… I brought him back. So, here is Steven just being all out needy and desperate for you… at the most inconvenient of times. (Dashes of Marc.)
Warnings: masturbation (at work), phone sex, sorta dirty talk.
MINORS (and ageless/untitled blogs) interacting will be blocked. 18+ only
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“I’ve got a bit of a problem,” Steven breathes through the phone, and you immediately note how his voice sounds alarmingly wobbly.
In response, you pace just as urgently to your office, seeking privacy, and keeping your voice hushed as you swerve through the corridors. “What is it? Is everything alright?”
“Mmhmph. I need you.” His voice is quivering now, and it only adds to your sudden, spiking concern. “So good to hear your voice, I…”
“Okay. Okay, Steven, I can be there,” you reassure without a second thought, clicking your office door closed behind you and scanning your desk for your car keys. “Just tell me what happened.”
“Oh. Oh, no. I’m fine, love,” Steven backtracks. “I don’t want to worry you. It’s just. It’s just that I… I need you.” His emphasis on the word need is a little bratty. Almost petulant. Stretched out, low and slow.
Oh. Oh it’s like that, is it?
You plonk yourself down into your office chair, with relief that he’s okay. And then, it doesn’t take long at all for you to reframe the conversation so far. To rethink the breathiness and tremor in his voice.
You recognise it.
That desperation.
That want; the pleas normally delivered into your skin, your throat, your arousal, spoken in between obedient swipes of his tongue.
“Oh, you do, baby? Well, I need you too, Steven,” you purr, voice hushed - as though someone else in the building could possibly hear you, even though you’re relatively sure that would be impossible. You slam the lid on your laptop shut all the same though, just in case you somehow initiate a video call against all conceivable odds. Then, licking your lips, you think up something tantalising to offer him, and it doesn’t take you long. “Just wait until later, baby. I’ll take all of you in my mouth until-“
“-No.”
“No?” But he usually likes that.
“No. I can’t wait,” he pleads, and the neediness in his hoarse, fractured voice has you pulsing with your own want. Squeezing your thighs unconsciously together. “You’ve got to help me. Please.”
“Fuck. Where are you?”
“I’m downstairs. In inventory.” You bite your lip. Steven hates that room. His need must really be a problem if he’s willingly taken himself down there. Out of sight. He must really be driven to distraction, and God, the thought of him working himself up behind that gift shop desk - with no possible hope of relieving himself - makes you feel some kind of way.
“Are you alone?”
“Of course I’m alone. I’ve had to lock the bloody door, haven’t I? I’ll get blimmin’ arrested if I walk around the museum with this in my trousers.” Your mind short-circuits a little at the thought of his bulging arousal. “I’m just so… uhhhhh. You have to help me, love. Can’t stop thinking about you and your beautiful body and I…” he huffs a punched breath into the receiver. “I need you.” The plea sends a warm honey melting through you core, and you can’t help but tease the pad of your finger along the centre seam of your trousers, enjoying the pressure against your now aching clit.
“Mmmm. Are you all hard for me, Steven?”
“Y-yes,” he flusters, and you can imagine his pretty eyelashes fanning against his cheek. “Aching. I thought hearing your voice would make it better but it’s… even harder to… concentrate on anythin’ else…”
Fuck.
The effect you have on him. How open he is with his want. Some men would be derogatory about how earnest Steven is, you’re sure. Personally, however, you find a man who knows what he wants and who isn’t afraid of it so endlessly hot. Especially, of course, when what he wants so badly is you.
Thinking quickly, you unfurl your headphones from your pocket, plugging them into your phone and leaving it on the desk. If you’re going to make Steven come, you want it in surround sound. And, of course, you might just want your own hands entirely free, after all. “It’s okay, Steven,” you soothe, voice smooth as silk and dousing some of his urgency. You hear a relieved exhale sound into the shell of your ear. “I’m going to help you, baby boy. Don’t worry. I’m here.”
“Th-thank you.”
“Good, Steven. Now. Can you… can you take yourself out of your pants?” You fight now to keep your own voice level, your chest heaving slightly - getting worked up for him too.
“Wh-what? Here? You can’t be bloody serious. Donna would have a-“
“-Yes. Right there, Steven,” you say more firmly. “It’ll be okay. It’ll be good. Can you do that for me?”
You can tell that he doesn’t have the will to argue. That he wants this. “O-okay. One sec. I’m gonna-”
You vaguely hear the clink of a belt buckle being loosened. Imagine that you hear the crank of a zip. But you most definitely do hear Steven’s muffled groan into the receiver, which lets you know - with certainty- that he’s now gripping his aching, weighty shaft in his broad, warm hand.
Tension hangs taut on the line, and his voice comes back little more than a whisper - which somehow fills your head all the same. “What now?”
“Move your hand, Steven. Up and down that thick shaft of yours. Really slow. Don’t rush.” Steven is breathing so hard that the sound crackles through your headphones, like a rumble of thunder in your head. “Are you hard, baby boy? Tell me.”
“‘M so hard.”
“Feel tender?” Steven’s in the most sensitive cock you’ve had. You think of the way he jerks and bucks against every touch. The way the flushed head of him throbs. The gusts of breath which billows out as his hands twist in the sheets. As he tries to stave off his end and fails. As you make him come over and over, just the way he likes, until he’s made a mess of himself, load after load covering his toned stomach. Edging him and milking him until he can’t take it anymore - and still, he begs you not to stop.
“Mmmmhmmm,” he hums affirmatively.
“Most sensitive cock I’ve had, aren’t you, my sweet thing?”
His breath and his voice are shaking now, fluttering against the receiver like fragile bird’s wings. “Y-yes. Only for you. Make me feel so g-good.”
“Mmm, Steven. Fuck. You’re making me all wet at my desk, do you know that? Keep touching yourself for me. Don’t you dare stop.”
“Won’t. Can’t stop. Anything you say.”
“That’s good, sweet boy.”
“W-will you… will you do it with me? Can you? Please.” The words are being squeezed out of him now, the way the circle of his fist must be squeezing down on his shaft. Gripping himself hard. Rolling his palm over the sensitive head of him, spreading that leaked bead of slick over his flushed, veined length. “Need to hear you, darling. B-been thinking about it all morning. The way you moaned into my ear last night when we made you cum. Like an angel, so beautiful. Keep thinking about you touching me. Making me give you everything, love.”
You can’t be blamed, can you, for popping the button on your trousers. For slipping them down around your ankles beneath the desk so you can part your legs just enough. For dragging your knickers aside just enough to skim a finger through your heat, finding it sensitive and slick. “I’m soaking, Steven. All wet for you. Do you want me to touch myself? Is that what you need?”
“Yes.” The man sounds broken. Levelled by want. You think back to how shy he was when you’d first gotten to know him. When he’d never had anyone touch him like that. About how quickly all of that unravelled as soon as you had gotten your hands - and mouth, and heat- on him.
“I’m going to put a finger inside of myself now, just for you.”
“No,” he counters.
“No?”
“Two. Spread yourself open.”
“Fuck. Okay.” You slip two fingers inside of yourself and you find that your cunt swallows them eagerly, so ready to be filled. “Still touching yourself for me too?”
“Yes. I wanna…”
“What do you want?”
“Wanna be good for you.”
Hnnng. From the bashfulness in his tone you can imagine the crimson flush creeping up his neck and reddening his cheeks all too well. You wonder if, with your words, you can make him blush more deeply again, even if you aren’t there to see it. “You are good for me,” you purr, and his breaths grow more ragged, the sounds coming hard and fast through the headphones. “You’re so good for me, Steven. So handsome. So beautiful. Touching yourself so well. Going to give me everything, aren’t you?”
“Mmmhhhmmm.”
“Use your words, baby boy. How does it feel? Tell me.”
“N-nothing like you,” he stutters. “But f-feels good. Feels n-nice.
You moan too, as you pulse your two fingers inside your heat, curling them and gathering up your dripping juices. Steven moans too as he hears your own sounds filter through the phone, and you can only imagine the glassy-eyed, pussy-drunk look washing over his face.
“So beautiful,” he gushes. “Want to be inside you.”
“Steven.”
“Again. Please.”
“What, baby?”
“Touch yourself, and say my name again. Please. Not anyone else. Need you all for myself.”
“Who’s a greedy little thing today, hmm?”
“Yeah. I am. Don’t care. Want you to be all mine. Need you so badly. Please.”
His broken, cracked apart plea breaks you, and you relish the pressure and glide of the slick pads of your fingers as you circle them against your wanting clit. “Steven,” you suspire, and that’s a wrecked sound too. You realise then the state you’re in, his brazen want inching you towards your own precipice. Dragging you over that edge with him. “Fuck, Steven, you’re going to make me come at my desk.”
“Want you to. Need you to. Please.”
“Are you close?”
“I’m going to make a mess.”
“Mmmm. That sounds delicious.”
Steven submits some broken apart syllables to you then, unable to get his words out.
“What is it, baby boy?”
“What should I think about when I…?” He huffs out a taut, loaded breath, and you know it signals that he is close to his end.
You increase the pressure and ministrations of your own hand, thinking about him doing the same. Thinking about how, if he were here, he could so easily glide the swollen head of him inside you and pulse himself into the depths of you. “Think about opening me up on your cock, Steven. Think about-“
That’s enough.
That’s enough and Steven’s blissed-out noises fill your head. You slip your fingers back inside of yourself as you picture him spilling himself over his own knuckles, the slight look of awe and surprise that always settles over his pretty face when he comes undone for you. You thumb at your clit and it’s enough. More than enough as Steven’s breathy noises punctuate each relieving pulse of his cock.
“Yes, that’s it, Steven. I’m coming now too. Fuck, baby. So good for me.”
Shit. You’re coming hard. So hard that you buck yourself against your own hand. That you screw your eyes shut as his disbelieving moans fill your head, right in the shell of your ear as though he is next to you. The sensations explode out through your whole body and you shudder with aftershocks, nervy and shaking, and sitting in a pool of your own juices on the sticky, faux leather office chair.
You relish it. Stay silent for a moment as you listen to Steven squeeze out every last drop. Wring himself dry. You enjoy each little nuance and variation of his ragged breaths right in your ear. All his little noises as he comes down, increasingly slow instead of urgent. Calm and sated rather than distressed. “Mmmm,” he hums as you curl your fingers inside of you one more time, the sound drawing a final, blooming aftershock from you which seeps warmly through your core. “Thank you, love.”
“Better?” You smile softly, feeling sleepy and cosy, despite it being the middle of the day. Despite being in your goddamn office.
“Much, thank you. You’re a goddess, you know?”
“So I’ve been told,” you smile, thinking of the man who has met actual deities and still sees fit to address you as such. It makes you feel special. Continues the warm buzz emanating through your body.
“Are you all gooey now?”
“I’ve made quite the mess,” you giggle.
“Me too.”
“Can you clean up?”
“Think so. Mostly went on the wall, thankfully. Bugger - there’s so bloody much of it.”
“Just couldn’t wait for me, baby?”
“No, angel.” There is a beat, as Steven’s feral state recedes, and his unfortunate thud back to reality begins. “Oh god, you weren’t busy when I called, were you, love?”
“Nah. Was only in a meeting with Royce. The twatty foxhunter prick?” Steven hums to signal he remembers. “Trust me. This was much more fun.”
“I’m glad. I’m gonna have to go though, love, I’m so sorry to dash.” You glance at the clock. He doesn’t have long left of his lunch break. “I love you, so much.”
“I love you too, Steven.”
“See you later tonight, yeah?”
“Bye, baby.”
You feel blissed out as you prepare to hang-up the call; however, something prevents you from doing so. Another, even more unexpected voice on the line.
“Wait. Don’t hang up.”
Marc.
Your stomach churns pleasantly, wondering if he’s been listening to you. Maybe even watching Steven. “I’m here. Been missing you.” It’s been a few days since he fronted.
“Good. ‘Cause it’s my turn next. How’s that little clit feeling, princess? Can it take another thrashing?”
“Jesus, Marc.”
“What? Getting Steven all worked up like that… Think you don’t do the exact same thing to me?”
“Mmmmph.” Words fail you right now, honestly. Sometimes, you truly can’t believe how lucky you are. “Alright. Tell me then. How can I be of service to you, Marc?”
“First thing’s first. Send me a picture of the mess you made.”
A dark smirk blooms over your mouth. “I will if you will.”
There is a beat. You hang on his every word, until he responds to you. “Copy that. But you’ll have to get me to make one first.”
Well. You might be in the office, but today, you really love your job.
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fumifooms · 3 months
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Ok maybe kinda of a weird question you don't have to answer if you don't want to but I've seen some people saying that Chilchuck is canonically misogynistic so, as the Chilchuck especialist, do you have an opinion about that?
Anon you are brave and I love you. Listen if you, person reading this, get peeved or upset when people say Chilchuck might have had not insignificant flaws as a father and husband then probably stop reading here, we will be looking at Chilchuck like a petri dish and defile his pristine allure. Tldr: yes but actually no but really both at the same time aka people & social dynamics are complex and please let your blorbos be flawed. With that said I will be pretty casual and playful if that wasn’t clear already, sorry.
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"Aren’t you happy to be in a harem party" "No it’s soul-crushing save me". Toshiro has been drinking his fear women juice since he was young, surrounded by an assassin nanny and her fellow assassin girlies, meanwhile Chilchuck having flashbacks of getting wrung out by his 4 women household…
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Waiting on people is something we see he hates doing a couple times throughout canon and extras, here and how he says "it’s not a date" -bless his summer child heart- he frames being slow to get ready as a gendered trait to have? But I can forgive him for this one because honestly the framing of the whole page leans into that, it’s kinda questionable if we’re being highly critical of anything misogynistic or regressive. But it itself is the classic subversive "Women are desirable wallflowers— Wrong! They are a monstrous ruthless force that wears on the mind, body and soul" trope. I don’t fault Kui though I got giggles from it, it makes sense for everyone’s characters, and Kui has never shied from gendered dynamics in her worldbuilding & characters so it’s not like she’ll write as if sex changes nothing and no one has opinions about it.
Alright alright let’s step back from analyzing this page specifically and get back to the question, is Chilchuck canonically misogynistic? It’s a complex question not because we don’t have hints but because it’s a very black and white answer to give and because misogynistic can be very wide or pretty narrow depending on how the term is applied.
What I would say? Yes, he is, in a realistic way that doesn’t automatically make him a piece of shit, though that doesn’t mean it isn’t uncomfortable or harmful. On the spectrum of misogyny he classifies to me as "It’s in the normalized lighthearted way of being a horny uncle who’s a little too loose about it around the dinner table", he’s a solid "He wants to treat women as pieces of meat and jokes about it but in actuality he’s a gentleman and a family careerman who has a job so he don’t really care about that rn".
Going back to Toshiro’s party, Chilchuck being weird about it being full of women doesn’t even happen only once but TWICE. I made a compilation of every time he’s crass, happens less than you might expect but the overall picture it gives throughout reading the manga is pretty straightforward. Repeatedly he’s shown to be dirty-minded and objectify & sexualize women lightheartedly unprompted. They’re a punchline and they’re eye candy and it’s "of COURSE my succubus would be young women, of COURSE women would desire a muscled statue’s [redacted], of COURSE women are sexual beings and of course I am attracted to them".
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Dungeon Meshi doesn’t bring up sexuality much and gendered dynamics tend to be more subtle than you’d expect from media in general, so there’s that, but I honestly struggle to think of any character that acts less normal about women existing than him. Like yeah he’s joking but Hien, Benichidori, Inutade and Maizuru were just breathing and doing their jobs. Who else’s misogynistic uhh, that guy working for the shadow governor that licks Cithis’ ear when she’s bound in ropes? The sheer jump from ‘makes demeaning jokes about women’ to ‘assaulter’ between these two, god.
Honestly it does feel odd to me that he’d be kinda demeaning like that about women even in a workplace setting —Chilchuck the union man out of everyone?— but Kui has spoken man idk, think what you will don’t shoot the messenger. It’s not like he’s weird about Namari? I guess he respects her too much- Wait that sounded wrong. Maybe it’s literally just because she and the other women party members are his direct coworkers, in line with his rule and all? But yeah, even if he canonically had a thing for blondes and pretty young women he has managed to only tease Marcille ceaselessly for fun & entertainment and make her hair extra shiny as his shapeshifter, you get a good behavior star there Chilchuck. He complains on waiting for Marcille to get ready in the barometz chapter but he also does with Laios when he’s late to meet up the party in extras. He constantly pulls on Marcille to get her to safety as if she can’t protect herself but she’s referred to as clumsy a lot so he has that justified reasoning. He constantly berates everyone so no point to make there. He undermines Marcille’s opinions often but it’s because he dislikes mages and elves and idealism. Clearly Chilchuck knows women can be capable and clearly he can have women coworkers (and friends! Again, Namari) without belittling or sexualizing them, clearly he can be normal about women and knows that some of his attitude can be inappropriate. It’s just harmless fun to him, that he keeps for occasional playful banter and taverns and the ‘right’ moods.
And as I mentioned earlier! Chilchuck is also pretty gentlemanly and protective. As always desires vs wants and instinct vs rationality show up as themes. Yes his succubus aka his ideal, the deepest allure he can imagine, is beautiful naked women, but a chapter just before that was the bicorn, all about how faithful and virtuous he is, how his heart’s in the right place. His brain is virtuous but his heart is monkey. My point is that when it counts, aka 90% of the time and when things are serious, we don’t see signs of sexist bias and he treats women well. Often takes on a protector role or at the least takes them seriously, even Benichidori. He doesn’t want to hurt women or thinks they’re insignificant or anything. He’ll give a handkerchief to a woman in need with a slimy face.
Okay okay this is really entering speculation territory but in my own tally, the way he dismissed his wife’s ‘bad mood’ as some meaningless tantrum that he shouldn’t think any more deeply about, him starting out not reaching out to her as a resentful silent treatment, and her getting dissatisfied in the first place enough to leave makes me think he took her for granted and was kinda dismissive of her in general. Marcille’s theorical scenario is hypothetical and factually untrue at least in parts, but if we do follow it, him forgetting he’s out with his wife for once (in the precious counted time he’s home spending time with her) and not paying attention to her all outing, resulting in her being left out of conversations and just an ornament beside him the way she might have felt for a long time as his housewife waiting home for him to come back………
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Half-foots seem to be patriarchal. The last section of this essay’s chapter (not by me!) + combing through the half-foot chapter should give you insight on that if you want. It’s in their patronymic, it’s in the way marriage seems very important especially for women, and it’s in the implied gender roles, being a housewife whose life revolves around raising her husband’s kids and taling care of the family home waiting for her husband who’s out working to come back. I think Chilchuck is a bit a result of his environment and upbringing in that way, that most of the misogyny is internalized and subconscious and passive, it’s taking his wife for granted because not only does she trust her, his most precious person he’s known since he was a kid, but because she’s his wife, his woman, conceptually something that’s unwaveringly devoted, something that is very valued and enforced in half-foot communities. Here’s a short post on half-foot family bonds culturally + here’s a post on marriage and half-foots for more. The community aspect of half-foots is very strong, which makes sense especially for how empoverished and discriminated against they are, which does come at the expense of not unlike dwarves (dwarves which half-foots idolize) having more pressure to fit in and have a good reputation to not be cast out and have no support lines. By being scared and needing stability people will often be more conservative, etc etc, though the reverse is also often true, like Chilchuck with his union. But yes Chilchuck seems to have many biases he clings onto, harsh on especially Marcille and Laios, Marcille for her idealism, race and magic meanwhile Laios for his lack of social skills and ‘reckless’ behavior.
He also does the classic "Don’t you dare date my daughter!!", though it’s a bit up in the air because he only gets agitated about coworkers being suitors, not nearly as hostile to the idea when it’s some nameless dwarf. But y’know when a guy assumes every men is as horny and sleazy as they are so they’re like "never trust men"… Chilchuck does embody a lot the tropes of just, the everyday flawed middle aged man. The absentee father and careerman husband who does care despite it all. Disillusioned grumpy old man. Old divorced drunkard joe with a thing for cute young blonde women, as a friend put it.
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We know Kui subverses tropes a lot, I definitely think Kui leans into these if nothing else for the bit. He’s tropes of the strict family Father, man doing inappropriate jokes around a beer with his drinking buddies, working man exhausted and frustrated by his job, midlife crisis. Also because of how he acts with Marcille, I always say he’s the boy on the playground pulling on the pigtails of his girl friend bc he thinks it’s funny. Because he thinks she’s pretty.
So point blank, Chilchuck respects women as individuals but he can get a little lost in the sauce when thinking about women in general and jumps to sexualizing them in ways that can be objectifying and dismissive. Casual lowkey misogyny for the bit that may or may not slip into non-jokes as well sometimes when it comes to seeing women as something inherently to defend or take for granted, though he’s well-meaning. He engages in gender roles of "men should be strong and burly" and "daughters should listen to their fathers’ opinion before dating a guy". A guy engaging in patriarchy without thinking much of it y’know, more or less passive and unaware. He’s good in economic and human rights issues but would not win the political correctness medal (though he does care about optics and is very conscious of appearing as upstanding and innocent with the elves or Toshiro’s and Kabru’s parties to avoid getting thrown in jail. Overcompensating for half-foot criminal reputations etc etc. Post on that here).
Do I believe Chilchuck would march for women’s rights? Yes. Do I believe he would make ‘ye old ball and chain’ and ‘my wife’ and ‘ah women’ jokes? Yes. Do I believe he would punch anyone making one such jokes about his wife or daughters? Yes.
I was pretty flippant bc honestly Chilchuck the Sleazy Horny Old Man is hilarious to me but yes hopefully the post was decent. "How could I be sexist? I love bitches"
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burnin0akleaves · 4 months
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Here's the draw six fanarts meme I decided to participate in 4 years late
In true burnin0akleaves spirit I didn't ask anyone for requests and just went ahead with all of the characters that have been the most impactful/important to me, so there is a high chance you've seen me draw these guys before.
By the way, unlike the rest of the blorbos here Siyra is an original character and belongs to @nineteen-rats!
Close-ups and rambles under the cut because it's my blog
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Ohh the Dark Urge. My latest obsession. I love his design so much, I'm a slut for white/red color schemes, but I feel like it's a double edged sword that takes you out of the horrors he's commiting at the same time?
Durge is supposed to be murder incarnate, someone that does every fucked up thing related to death imaginable; but when you see a giant lizard eating babies or humping corpses, it dulls the effect a bit since you automatically view it as an animalistic act. Dragonborns are obviously a fully sentient humanoid race in-universe; but when the violence you're seeing is already toeing the line between horrifying and hilarious, seeing a scalie doing it just pushes it over the line. I still think it works really well most of the time and I'm very glad that this is the default durge we get! It's just funny to me that when you choose to play as the giant lizard, the dark and disgusting horror story turns into the hilariously edgy bloodfest.
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Reminding everyone again that Siyra belongs to @nineteen-rats! I love this man so so so much. I am the Siyra fandom. I am the number one Siyra fanartist. He did nothing wrong and I will defend his every decision. I also hope terrible horrors befall him and that his actions keep him awake for the rest of his life. Pookie bear xoxo
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COMING IN WITH THE STEEL CHAIR IT'S WILL TREATY
He is on my mind, always. I don't talk about him as much but he's probably still the fictional character who had the most impact on me as a person.
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PATROCLUS! PATROCLUS!!! SIR I'M YOUR NUMBER ONE FAN!!
I got into patrochilles and the Illiad in general thanks to "The Song of Achilles". It was one of the first queer books I got to have in real life and the prose captivated me instantly, I still have it on my shelf. After reading the Illiad itself however, I hate that book so much. I'm sorry it's genuinely beautiful and I get why people like it but I can never forgive that horrible Patroclus characterization after seeing what he was originally like. Achilles too for that matter.
Hades swooped me up into its arms like I was a sick baby bird and nursed me back to health with its portrayal of the two though and for that I am forever grateful. I can't wait for Hades 2, death to Chronos.
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God Half-Life is such an important series for me. My dad would let me play through a few levels since I was a child, he grew up with the games, but I REALLY played through the entire series one summer shortly before dad moved out. He was there watching me play most of it and getting to enjoy someone actually translate the game's dialogue for him for the first time.
Gordon may not speak once but I like the hints of his personality we get throughout the games, most importantly from the way Alyx talks to/about him. I have my own characterization of him obviously but I do really think you can get a good understanding of the kind of man he is meant to be in-universe just by paying attention to his surroundings. Also another reason the games were so immersive for me is that I'm just as in love with Alyx as Gordon is. I must have let her get hit only once or twice the entire time just out of how protective I was over her. I'd topple the entire Combine empire just for her hand in marriage. I rewatched the ending of Half Life Alyx recently and cried.
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I read the entirety of LOTR in one week in 11th grade, carrying that damn brick of a book everyday to school and back. I'm so glad I did honestly. Frodo and Sam are my important little guys and I find myself going back to them when I need something to calm me down in a way no other series except LOTR can. I've read most of Tolkien's work at this point, but nothing captivated me like those two little hobbits. Everytime I read a bad take about their relationship I sketch them making out.
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People liked seeing my drawing process before so here's the original sketch and the little notes I wrote to myself trying to set the mood. I followed like half of them.
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tcfactory · 5 months
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Been thinking about MoShang and the question of how they would handle SQH ascending, because depending on how the world works (which we don't really know based on canon tbh) the heavens might be a completely separate plane of existence you can't easily come back from if at all. Also what about BingQiu? Bingge or Bingmei, he would raze everything to the ground, kill everyone and salt the earth if he got separated from his Shizun.
I know the easy answer is MBJ's teleportation powers or SQH pulls some author nonsense, but hear me out:
Heavenly demons are called that because they were originally kicked out of heaven. Probably primordial deities of sorts. So technically it should be possible for them to ascend again.
So clearly the best way to make MBJ eligible for ascension is to turn him into a heavenly demon. Do they borrow the heavenly aspect from LBH who can ascend either as a heavenly demon or just a regular cultivator? Do they go through a bunch of wacky hijinks ft. TLJ? (“It’s a bit like mold, divinity. You only need to give a little and if the target cultivates the right way it will spread and he will become a proper heavenly demon over time. I’ll help him get started!”) Who knows, I haven't thought that far, this idea starts and ends with 'what if heavenly demon MBJ ascending with his husband?' actually.
Also if they decide that LBH should ascend through his heavenly demon ancestry, then he would need to actually better himself and sort out all his insane neuroses which sure would be An Event. Shen Yuan trying to very belatedly instill Good Morals (any kind of morals, really) in his husband would be a trashfire. MBJ can cultivate towards detachment or something, he has the temperament for it, but LBH can't and it would bug him so much that MBJ is beating him in something. All the while TLJ is giving Advice (Wrong Answers Only) from the sidelines because he put off trying to ascend until ZZL gets reincarnated, but that doesn't mean he can't be involved in the proceedings and have fun.
And once they are all gods there can be some extra shenanigans, because I always thought that it must be one hell of a time to sort the twelve peak lords/new gods out and this batch comes with two extra. Transmigrator and Airplane reveal? Sure, why not. Shen Jiu waiting for them there because he lived Shen Yuan's life (got all the therapy he needed, bettered himself and worked off his karma) and then the universe short circuited and he got pulled back here ages ago and he's kinda pissed that his martial siblings took this long? Hell yes (QiJiu are my blorbos, Do Not Separate).
Just a whole pile of "We ascended to heaven and it was only a medium-sized disaster, actually".
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@mandlien: Op where is the essay 👀 @latitudeoctopus: An essay I would like to see 🙏
Glad u asked! <-guy who was totally angling for someone to ask
OG post this continues from, for those just tuning in now:
actually SQQ's first encounter with LQG perfectly illustrates which of SY's idiosyncrasies perfectly converged to make him absolutely obsessed with Binghe, in this essay i will
So, to start with, the explanation for why I think this scene in particular is more illuminating than all of SQQ's interactions with actual LBH. 
That's because there's not a single scene in the novel where his interactions with LBH-the-person are not colored by pre-existing bias of already being obsessed with LBH-the-character. Like, consider the scene where he appraises Shen Qingqiu's looks, and finishes it off with:
He still couldn’t compare to Luo Binghe. (vol.1, ch.1)
despite not having seen Luo Binghe in person yet. But no, he's already convinced his beloved blorbo is of course The Handsomest Ever!
Simply speaking, we never encounter Shen Yuan pre-Binghe Syndrome (when instead of brain there's binghe). So it's difficult to tell whether any particular way he thinks or feels in Binghe’s presence is the standard for him, or owed to the fact that he already likes Binghe in at least one way.
But the same can not be said of Liu Qingge: while SY did have some interest in his character, he didn’t really think of him before encountering him in Lingxi Caves. Plus, unlike Binghe who seems to have fully aligned with SQQ’s expectations of him, LQG had given him a little shock — which prompted some re-evaluation of his prev thoughts on SQQ's part.
(cont. under cut)
Now is a good time to mention that I arrived at thinking about this scene while considering Shen Yuan's relationship with toxic masculinity — and remembering I jotted down 'Shen Yuan's fascination with masculinity' in my reread notes for this scene.
[Bai Zhan Peak] was the most warlike of Cang Qiong Mountain's branches, as well as the branch with the greatest martial ability. Every single generation's Bai Zhan Peak Lord was a world-class swordmaster, a victor of countless battles, an undefeated legend. How hot-blooded—how dashing!  Male readers always fervently admired strong characters. Even though Liu Qingge never officially debuted on page, he hadn't lacked for fans, and Shen Yuan had been especially fascinated with him. In his headcanon, Liu Qingge had been a sharp and manly man, powerful and magnificent. A war god, right?! (vol.1, ch.2)
So, Shen Yuan’s fascination with Liu Qingge’s character — or rather his headcanon version of it — is about Liu Qingge being someone who (in SY’s mind) embodies masculine qualities. And what qualities are those? From this section, being “strong” (has to be physically powerful) and “undefeated” (can’t be a loser) — yeah, pretty standard toxic masc starting kit. 
And something of interest here: though SQQ describes it mostly as his own feelings, even in this excerpt, he slips in a “male readers always [...] admired” — which, when considering everything else we know about his relationship to masculinity, kind of gives off an insecurity vibe. He seems to be either trying to justify his own feelings (i.e., ‘other men feel the same way, i’m in-group not out-group, i’m not failing at being a man by feeling this way [admiring another man]’), or else emulating other male fans and trying to convince himself he relates to the story the same way they do (i.e., ‘male readers admire strong characters and im a man therefore i definitely also admire the same things’).
Speaking of emulating other male fans, there’s another quality that SY seems to associate with masculinity, this one not very related to Liu Qingge — though SQQ does make a mental detour into it in the same scene, when talking about other Peaks.
Yeah, when he mentions Xian Shu, and the fact that the popularity of self-insert erotic/lewd fics about Xian Shu "compared to that of the original work” in PIDW fandom, or possibly even in general on ‘Zhongdian’ (since afaik you can publish fanfiction on Chinese webnovel sites alongside original works, you just have to tag it as such). In other words, among male fans. 
But we know SY doesn’t like sex scenes, right? Hell, his favorite wife is Liu Mingyan at least in part because she doesn’t have sex scenes:
There was one more appeal factor. Liu Mingyan was the only female character for whom Airplane Shooting Towards the Sky didn't write detailed sex scenes. (vol.1, ch.2)
Of course… that’s what SQQ says in his head where nobody can hear him. We actually have evidence of him singing a different tune when among other fans:
Most of the female protagonists are stupid sexy lamps, and the male lead doesn't even bed Liu Mingyan, the only breath of fresh air? He doesn't bed the rightful empress? Are you fucking kidding me? (vol.4, ch.26, part 1)
(speaking of, this is why ‘peerless cucumber is SY’s true self’ takes baffle me. his toxicmascsona is his true self, really?)
So SY has another qualifier for ‘manly man’ in his head: being sexual (of course, in a straight way). Which is not something that comes naturally to him, as evidenced by him cringing away from any actual action even when he tries to emulate the thought pattern, e.g.:
Qi Qingqi? She was indeed slightly junior to him, and their first meeting...he'd long forgotten how it went. "Often together" wasn't quite right, though. Perhaps he at times dared to think about going to Xian Shu Peak so they could be "often together," but while he had the wicked intentions, he lacked the courage required to follow through—and he could never commit an act as depraved as stalking. (vol.4, ch.23) 
Riiiight, SQQ, you totally have those 'wicked intentions' that you merely can't follow through on because you just invented reasons not to.
But that does give us an image of SY’s ideal of masculinity. Extremely powerful, undefeatable, and hypersexual… yeah no points for guessing who. I’m pretty sure SQQ even directly equates Bing-ge with masculinity somewhere, I just can’t remember the exact spot. And he also believes that any man should definitely want to be in Bing-ge’s place, like for example here:
Every man dreamed of being caught between an angel and a devil. To watch them jealously vie with each other over him one moment, then risk life and limb for his sake in the next—that was the highest, most sacred, perverted fantasy of every male organism.  (vol.1, ch.2)
…though I must note, once again, “every man”, “every male organism” — but does SQQ actually feel the same way? I think that the answer is he thinks that he should, and is trying to convince himself that he does.
Which must be difficult considering he finds men more attractive than women, returning back to that scene with Liu Qingge.
In any other state, Shen Qingqiu might have declared, "What a beautiful man!" (vol.1, ch.2)
Really bestie? You would've declared it? Because I don't see you show the same enthusiasm about women. In fact, you usually jump right into how they were described in the novel, as if you don't have your own opinion. 
Now, I must note that I personally don’t think finding someone attractive equals actually being attracted to them. But this does imply which way SQQ's tastes veer. In fact, we can even see that he has a type. First, he describes LQG's face as "as beautiful as a fine woman's"; then adds:
This was clearly the face of a charming young master who arranged flowers and plucked farewell willow branches! (vol.1, ch.2)
Of course, if we are talking about charming young masters with feminine looks, their bearing that of a classic Chinese gentleman (warrior-scholar ideal who’d ‘pluck farewell willow branches’)...
That firm yet humble countenance, demonstrating his noble and unyielding spirit. That pencil-straight back and stance, evincing a proud core that would rather break than bend! (vol.1, ch.1)
[SQQ] saw a glimpse of the future Luo Binghe's unique grace, that of "eyes like cold stars, a soft and radiant smile, with muted words and quiet laughter." (vol.1, ch.1)
In truth, deep down, Bing-ge's fair and clean pretty-boy type didn't really suit the tastes of "Great Master" Airplane Flying Towards the Sky. He had only assigned this sort of configuration to the protagonist to meet his stallion hardware specifications. The art of growing stallions was grounded in science, and the research was clear: women preferred men who looked cultured, pretty, and even a bit soft and feminine. (vol.4, ch.26, part 2)
…there’s no question who is superlative in SQQ’s heart. To boot, he doesn’t even realize that he’s biased about LBH’s attractiveness, as we can see from Airplane-bro’s musings above. So that’s Cucumber-bro’s type: cultured, pretty, a bit feminine.
See, a fun little discrepancy here: what SQQ sees as a masculine ideal and therefore can admire plainly — again, powerful, undefeatable, and hypersexual, — and what he finds attractive in a man, under all those layers of denial, are two pretty different things.
Liu Qingge, despite his appearance unveiling a side of both to us, doesn’t actually fully embody either type: on the masculinity side, he is missing the hypersexuality, on the attractiveness side, his looks fit but his bearing doesn’t match.
But you know who hits all of SY’s qualifications on both counts?.. yeah, once again no points for guessing, it stars with "Bing" and ends with "ge".
So: the source of Shen Yuan’s obsession with LBH-the-character is the intersection of those two factors. Like you know that old wlw joke “I can’t tell if I wanna be her or date her”? Thats Shen Yuan with Luo Binghe, but, yknow, unconsciously. He admires LBH as an epitome of masculinity, an image of a Perfect Male to strive for; he also very much finds him attractive in a gay way. 
In fact, I would even say that an important component of Binghe brainrot is that he is an acceptable target for admiration. How can SY be accused of being gay over liking a horny stallion novel? So it’s totally normal that he thinks of Binghe a lot, obviously that’s just because he looks up to him! Because Binghe is such a perfect iteration of a male stallion protagonist! Who wouldn’t want to be in his place, thinks Shen Yuan, never ever having imagined being in Binghe’s place even once. Ofc that’s only because Binghe got insane game though! Shen Yuan couldn’t hope to compare. LBH is just so admirable and sexy,, for the wives of course, the wives find him sexy, not Shen Yuan, Shen Yuan is just stating facts— etcetcetc.
Point is, LBH is a man that Shen Yuan can like without shame, because he has a whole bag of above-the-board reasons to prove that he's not liking him the wrong way. A perfect target of convergence for Shen Yuan’s conscious and unconscious thoughts (and desires).
And this is how SY ended up with the years-long hyperfix we see in the beginning of the novel. 
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latinotiktok · 1 year
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Propaganda:
Chell
-‼️ y muerte a los que la dibujan blanca !!
Chell de portal - vi que alguien mas dijo chell y son completamente correcto. Y MUERTE a los que la dibujan blanca !
Comments on the VS KARKAT showdown:
"WHO FUCKING GIVES A SHIT ABOUT KARKAT THE PERSON THEY USED AS A REFERENCE MODEL FOR CHELL IS LITERALLY BRAZILIAN !!!! HER NAME IS ALESIA GLIDEWELL HERES A PICTURE OF HER DRESSED AS CHELL !!!!!"
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lpm si chell la modelaron a base de uma brasilera PQ LA BLANCASIFICARON. PERDON LA VEZ Q LA DIBUJE COLORPICKIE DEL MODEL SHEET COMO UNA PELOTUDA. DIOS NUNCA ME VA A PERDONAR. AWANTE CHELL BRASILERA LOKO
Nicholas D. Wolfwood
-Nicholas D Wolfwood because he looks like my dad (mexican), he's catholic, his life's purpose is to protect children (against the church), and he's got eldest daughter syndrome. He doesn't want to be doing any of this he's someone's older brother who's working 3 jobs to pay his family's mortgage. Eldest of thirty. In canon forced to take care of his younger foster siblings.
-Wolfood y leorio porque son dos morenazos tetones
-Nicholas D. Wolfwood aka el Nicolás Villalobos. Lo tiene todo. Catholic guilt. Homosexualidad reprimida. Problemas emocionales. Energía de hermano y primo mayor. Tits out guns out. Escucha Chayanne mientras va en moto me lo dijo él mismo
-WOLFWOOD FROM TRIGUN. WHY - THE MEXICAN CATHOLIC SWAG OF IT ALL.
-Nicholas D Wolfwood (Trigun)El chabón tiene todo para ser latino. Morenito, con traumas católicos, canchero, esa nariz que denota que no es un blanco cualquiera ❤️
-el don nicolas de trigun 199algo. solo miralo.
-nicholas d. wolfwood ya todos sabemos por que, este blog completo tiene posts de por que. el tipo es ecuatoriano/colombiano vamos ptm. (imagen del perrito wolfwood que dice te quiero mucho latinoamerica)
-nime (2023) Anime (1998) Manga KANJI ニコラス・D・ウルフウッド ROMAJI Nikorasu Dī Wurufuwuddo ALTERNATE NAMES Reveal DEBUT Episode 4: Hungry! APPEARS IN Trigun Stampede RACE Human, genetically modified VOICE ACTOR JP: Yoshimasa Hosoya EN: David Matranga STATUS Reveal FAMILY Reveal MORE We're nothing like God. Not only are our powers limited, but we are sometimes driven to become the devil himself. NICHOLAS D. WOLFWOOD Nicolás D. Wolfwood de Trigun. ¿Es un pedazo de carne Y es Católico? TIENE que ser Latino no hay de otra!
-nicholas d wolfwood de trigun maximum por que lleva con el una cruz gigante y tiene tetas grandes 🥰
-Nicholas Wolfwood nomás porque es un moreno que está bien pinche guapo!!! Aparte las tetas que se carga son un patrimonio de Latinoamérica
-Nicholas D. Wolfwood, because he's the perfect man & I love him. I'm sure there's more lmao I can't think of anything good rn it's so late. I just see other people adding him & I want to up our chances of getting him in the poll
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hemolock · 1 year
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Hey so I absolutely despise the attitude so many people have about this game, so here are some tips not to hate the game
1. Take breaks. You will get burnt out, everyone does. If you aren’t enjoying the game, don’t play it, even if it means missing out on something. The goal of the game is not to succeed or even to play it, it’s to have fun.
2. Watch actual destiny 2 content creators. Those videos of people complaining for ten minutes? Not content. I get that bungie is doing some dumb stuff, but if almost all of the person who you’re watching’s videos are talking about the latest funny bungo moment that will totally kill the game for real, stop watching them. They’re doing what the news does, making videos on only bad things to draw your attention more. Instead, watch people who actually like the game, who actually play it for fun.
3. Give your guardians personalities. This may seem like an outlier, but I genuinely believe that making your guardians into characters improves the longevity of your enjoyment. My main proof is that I did this and have spent so much time thinking about the funny blorbos so I think it works.
4. Leave negative spaces. Places like Reddit are a lost cause, they already hate the game so much that I don’t think they’ll ever come back. It’s best to divorce yourself from the side of the community that hates everything, since then their opinions on the game taint your own.
5. Ignore what other people think. When I first got the game, every time I got a new exotic I would be sad because even though I thought it was fun I would look up builds for it and there would only be videos saying it’s bad. It’s best to just get your own opinions on what is and isn’t fun, and then act accordingly. For example, I think that the manticore and wings of sacred dawn is a good combo. Is it? God no. But I had fun using it so I throw it on from time to time.
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