#people act like she went around like actually killing her friends when in script that's just not how it is.

[anothermonikan]

Monika being normal when she doesn't have the power of gods is a large sense-make.

It is!! I think, a lot of the ddlc fandom has a problem where they've flanderised the characters down to their most extreme states and forgot what they actually are like. in the actual game. So there are people out there who write and characterise Monika as if she's always some yandere who's obsessed with the player character who has no morality and will kill anyone who gets in her way. yknow she's not even like that in the actual game either, people just saw that act 3 Monika was kind of yandere-tropey and forgot everything about her actual character and made her yandere girl 300. Monika could have done worse. sorry I'm being a Monika apologist I do have monikan in my blog name. Monika is literally just some dorky high-school girl who was given god powers and told her world wasn't real and that part of her character doesn't go away when she has the revelation, why would it not be present when she doesn't have god powers? I have lots to say about Monika. Thanks for the ask!

[justforbooks]

‘Chandler Bing,” wrote Matthew Perry in his puckish, self-mocking memoir, “changed the way that America spoke”. The actor’s bold words were true – but only up to a point. Yes, there was a period in the late 1990s when people overemphasised the verb to comic effect: “Could that be any more annoying?” But that was really more of a verbal tic. The Matthew Perry/Chandler Bing paradox was that he demanded not to be taken seriously, and in doing so, became the ego ideal of generation X, which is a pretty serious job. So even though he had – no question – the best lines in Friends, he was never what he would have been in an earlier era: the sidekick.

So much of the plot structure rested on Chandler being the second string: the maladroit loser to Joey’s lothario, the joker skating beneath Ross’s romantic gravity. He was never intended as the leading man. He and Monica were never story-arced to get married. The One With Ross’s Wedding: Part 2 was meant to just be a one-night stand. Friends co-creator Marta Kauffman said years later: “We thought it was going to be funny, then we were going to get rid of it.” In the event, they actually had to stop taping because people in the delighted audience were screaming.

Of course Chandler was the romantic lead. His was the spirit of the age: self-deprecating, metrosexual, all ironic distance, no ambition. It had a gravitational pull. It’s the classic stuff of romance, the Emma plot: the guy who creeps up on you, because, duh, he’s everything. Except Chandler did that to his own creators. Incidentally, he’s a way better character before he gets together with Monica. And he’s a way better character when he hates his job. The unfolding of adulthood was like kicking two legs off a stool. Gen X is a shadow of itself when it grows up.

Perry always said how much like his character he was, to the extent that when he auditioned for the role, he went completely off script and just started delivering more material: he wrote 10 jokes for every episode, and reliably got two in. His particulars were telling: an only child whose parents divorced when he was one. His real-life dad was an alcoholic, later recovered, an actor, but small-time. His mother was press aide to Pierre Trudeau, the Canadian prime minister. Before Perry developed acting ambitions he was an obsessive tennis player, nationally ranked in Canada by the age of 14. He discovered drinking around the same time and was, he wrote, “a broken human being” by 15, when he moved to Hollywood.

The great mystery of Friends is why none of its players made much cinematic impact beyond its enormous influence – and this was truer of Perry than of anyone. He turned in completely fine performances in unremarkable films: Fools Rush In, Almost Heroes, The Ron Clark Story. He co-created and co-wrote the TV series Mr Sunshine in the early 2010s, but it lasted only a year before low ratings killed it. It is possible that the residuals model sapped everyone’s ambition: Warner makes a billion dollars a year from syndication reruns, of which the cast get 2% each. That’s $20m (£16.5m) apiece.

More important but harder to quantify was the cultural effect of Friends: people really fell for those characters, hard. All six of the actors had the world at their feet, but nobody really wanted to see them step out of role – because it broke the spell. It is impossible to overstate how seriously we all took it, when Jennifer Aniston married Brad Pitt. It was as if Rachel herself had achieved the unthinkable, a Little Mermaid move where she crashed out of the ocean and brought the fairytale into real life.

Perry’s romantic history was, of course, chequered, which is to say, eventful, but nothing lasted. The details of his relationship with Julia Roberts are so 1990s, it is unreal: he wooed her by fax (yes, kids, this was a thing). And Perry dumped Roberts to avoid getting dumped himself, he said later, relaying deliciously: “I can’t begin to describe the look of confusion on her face.” It was a move that had all the logic of Chandler Bing himself.

Back then, we would have called Perry a commitment-phobe, but what he actually was was a drug addict. The story of his dependency is told through his changing appearance in the passing seasons of the show: “heavier” when he was drinking, thin when he was on drugs, thin with a goatee when he was on a lot of drugs. The rest of the cast protected him when he was too gone to deliver his lines, and tried to intervene many times, having guessed at only a tiny fraction of his substance abuse.

It is incredible, really, how long he survived, plausibly playing this character who may have started life so similarly to Perry himself, but diverged in one critical way: like all the Friends characters, his was almost impossibly clean-living. It never really made sense, all the high jinks they got up to, powered only by coffee. It was very much generation X, the US edition: such a show in the UK would have had at least one very heavy drinker, and Central Perk would have been a pub. Perry was its guilty secret, the One Who Wasn’t Really Very Like His Character at All Any More, and he was powerfully aware of that.

That 2022 memoir, called Friends, Lovers and the Big Terrible Thing, concluded with a thankful utterance that was no less credible for being obligatory in a recovering addict: “At this point in my life,” he wrote, “the words of gratitude pour out of me because I should be dead, and yet somehow, I am not.”

Perry’s entire adult life was plagued by addiction. Telling his story in numbers, he estimated that he had been in twice-weekly therapy for 30 years, checked into rehab 15 times, and attended more than 6,000 AA meetings. He had numerous other health crises, including a perforated colon in 2019 that put him in a two-week coma. “So full of shit it nearly killed me,” he said of the event.

But in a pre-opioid world, he would have just got clean, eventually. Maybe he wouldn’t have made old bones, but he wouldn’t have died this young, not at 54. He should have had a longer sunset. His death feels tragically discordant – an unjust end to a life lived in the service of the punchline.

Daily inspiration. Discover more photos at Just for Books…?

[theoddcatlady]

Blood On Set

Being an actor isn’t easy. I’d like to act full time but right now working the night shift at my local Wal-Mart is what pays… part of the bills. I got three roommates to afford my apartment, we all bond on the impossible dream of catching our big break in the MCU.

Frankly I was through the moon when I finally got called back to do some work as one of the main characters in an indie film. Up until then, all my ‘acting’ skill was as an extra or a dead body and I was dying to actually show what I could do, you know? I wasn’t gonna get paid well but this could’ve been a stepping stone to greater things.

Shooting was to take place over two weeks. I was to play Seth Taylor, childhood friend to the main character who always wanted something a little more but never had the nerve. Plotline was basic, college girl was being stalked by an unknown figure who may or may not be supernatural, turns out it’s a group of satanists who need to sacrifice her on the new moon to achieve their sinister goals.

The night before shooting began all of us actors had drinks together. It was great getting to know each other. The star of the show was Abby, and I don’t really believe in love at first sight… but I believe in instant chemistry. And I knew off the bat Abby and I were compatible. She had this spark, this love for life and for acting. She’d already gotten a few small roles, even a guest role on a TV show as the victim of the week. I never felt so immediately comfortable around someone else.

Got to meet a few other people too, Geoffrey, who was going to be Abby’s boyfriend/first victim of the movie. He had one of those big laughs that could get a bit grating after a while, but he was nice enough. Liberty, who was going to be Abby’s best gal friend, she had such a morbid sense of humor and had us laughing all night. Ricky, CJ, Garrett, all gonna be various cult members, and Colin, the cult leader. I wasn’t really sure about the casting of Colin, he seemed so quiet, but I realized quite quickly when he stood up why he was cast- dude was nearly seven feet tall. I’m fucking five foot four, I had to crane my neck up to see his face.

Our director/writer/producer was Duncan Turner. He seemed pretty nice, a bit nervous, but nice. Clearly had a boner for Abby, he couldn’t tell her no to anything. I tried to tell him I was a trans man, he seemed to be trying to avoid the subject, then Abby brings up the idea of working that into my character’s backstory and he immediately grabbed his copy of the script to start scribbling in new lines.

Yeah, it was clear this was his first movie, but frankly I didn’t care. This was the first time I had a role with more than two lines. I was pumped.

First two days of shooting went off perfectly. Despite my initial doubts about Colin, he came right into the role of the disturbing cult leader Damion. And although the script was a little cliché, a little ridiculous, it was still fun.

It was fun. Until things got… weird. And by weird I mean someone got killed.

It was day three. We mostly used Duncan’s old college as a set, and we were filming the scene where Abby’s character Nancy is being chased around a theater all set up for a college production of The Phantom of the Opera. What was meant to happen was I was supposed to trip CJ and we were supposed to run off while he was stunned.

What happened was, I tripped CJ, I heard the sound of something cracking, and I looked up just in time for a giant fucking spotlight to come crashing down. CJ opened his eyes just in time for it to squash his head like a grape. Blood and head gore exploded everywhere, covering me, Abby, and the set around us.

I threw up. Duncan screamed bloody murder. Abby just stared at CJ’s twitching body.

Yeah, holy shit. I’ve never seen a dead body outside of a funeral before and uh… yeah, had a lot to talk about with my therapist that week.

It was just an accident, of course. No one was up there. Something was a little loose, and CJ was just in the wrong place at the wrong time. That was our third take of that scene, I was declared not responsible for CJ’s death. And uh, we marched on with filming.

Yeah, it’s cold, and I probably should’ve jumped ship then. But we only had so much time we were allowed to film at the college and Duncan invested a lot of his own money into this movie. Not to mention if I did leave, I’d forfeit my paycheck. We managed to reshoot the scene with Garrett and at the parking lot instead. Granted, Garrett nearly got hit by a goddamn car because some dumb bitch was driving drunk instead of taking an Uber, but he dodged it last second.

I should’ve known the shoot was cursed though. Like nothing as bad as CJ happened until the last day, but things were always off. Garrett kept showing up drunk and ended up breaking his ankle. Thankfully he’d already shot all his scenes but Jesus Christ dude, it’s still work. Ricky just stopped showing up, fucked off to god knows where. Geoffrey cut his arm really bad during his murder scene and it got infected. One of our dude extras got a little creepy with Liberty and she ended up breaking his nose. I could go on. Not to mention I started having some really fucked up nightmares.

I’d always struggled with nightmares. My combo of meds make my dreams super fucking vivid, but this was different. I swore I was really there when I dreamed that Garrett’s feet were getting sawed off. Or when worms and maggots started crawling out of Geoffrey’s cut arm, silencing his screams when they all filled his mouth and choked him to death. Just. Really fucked up shit.

I spent a lot of time with Abby to distract me from all the weird shit going on. We’d have drinks at her place, we’d talk everything from our acting dreams to the name of our favorite Neopet when we were kids. God, I could’ve talked about anything with her. I felt so safe and comfortable around her.

Maybe I should’ve picked up quicker that nearly all our male extras bailed. Or just didn’t turn up. There was something very wrong with this shoot and it’s on me that I didn’t realize something was wrong.

Last day. Last shoot. Final scene. Seth was going to save Nancy from being sacrificed by Damion, and we’d kill him together. It was originally going to be shot in Duncan’s basement, but the morning of I got a text, saying Abby was going to pick me up and that things had changed.

She arrived about an hour from sundown, already in costume judging by the fake blood all over her t-shirt. I jumped in the car and asked what was up.

“Colin has a better basement, more space for camera junk and stuff. Duncan was totally cool with it and will meet us there. Apparently it’ll be a one take deal, so you think you can do it?”

I gave a double thumbs up. Abby smiled, my heart melted, and she offered me a bottle of water. So my throat wouldn’t be dry during shoots.

I didn’t realize I was drugged until I was almost asleep, and of course by then it was too late.

I woke up tied to a chair, some sort of cloth stuffed in my mouth to gag me. The room was completely dark and smelled like rotting meat. In front of me, I saw Duncan laying on the floor, his head was bleeding but I heard him groan. I wondered why the hell he wasn’t getting up but then I saw the pools of blood around his hands and feet.

He’d been nailed to the goddamn floor.

When Abby walked into sight it hit me like a sledgehammer that the blood on her shirt probably wasn’t fake.

She waved her hand and candles all around the room lit up. I would’ve screamed if I could’ve, but all I could do was stare in horror at the bodies nailed to all the walls. Garrett, Ricky, CJ’s headless body, all the other extras that stopped showing up, other guys I didn’t recognize. All of them were dead with their chests ripped open.

Abby came beside me and tested the ropes on my wrists to make sure they were secure. “You comfortable? They aren’t too tight or anything?” She asked.

I stared at her, I couldn’t believe this was happening. Abby nodded before removing the gag. “Right, sorry. Can’t talk while gagged.”

I swallowed all the spit in my mouth before I said, “Why are you doing this?”

“Because he needs it. Otherwise he’ll die. And I won’t let my boyfriend die. You’re just here so you have an alibi, so it’s not pinned on you. Cuz I really like you, Logan. And I’m sorry you have to witness this, but if it gets too much, just close your eyes. I had to at first too.”

I was going to ask why the hell her ‘boyfriend’ needed something when I realized something was hanging from the ceiling that was not another body.

It crawled down one of the walls, its unnaturally long limbs jointed in three different places. It had six arms and four legs, and was naked. Each of its pale fingers ended in an inch long claw. It was the most inhuman thing I have ever seen.

But its head was human, even if its neck was almost two feet long. Colin’s head. Colin’s head was on this thing’s body, and as it looked up at me I swear its eyes looked hungry. Abby patted its shoulder and shook her head. “Leave him alone, babe. He’s my friend,” She said.

Colin looked at her before bobbing its head up and down and it scrambled over to the awakening Duncan.

“Wha… what’s going on…” Duncan’s eyes fluttered open as Colin’s head hovered above his own. His face went white. “Oh- oh my god, what the f-”

One of Colin’s limbs shot forward and its claws unzipped Duncan’s chest like a winter jacket, his guts spilling out everywhere. Duncan’s scream will never leave me. Colin’s mouth opened, revealing a mouthful of janky sharp teeth before he bit into Duncan’s guts, I think I saw him pull out an intestine before I listened to Abby and closed my eyes.

Duncan didn’t scream for much longer, but the chewing and swallowing sounds were impossible to block out. When it was all quiet, I finally opened my eyes. Duncan’s torso was hollowed out, his eyes staring lifelessly at the ceiling.

Colin looked normal again, just your average guy. Abby patted his back, kissed his gore covered cheek, and he walked upstairs. She looked at me and I had to ask one more thing:

“What the hell are you two?”

Abby laughed quietly.

“I’m a witch. And as for Colin… he’s… unknown.”

With that, she walked upstairs and out of my life.

The cops came soon enough, I guess Duncan’s screams carried enough, or maybe Abby called them. I was taken to the hospital and thankfully I was just considered a victim that these two crazy motherfuckers hadn’t gotten around to. There was twelve bodies in that basement.

Maybe Abby cursed the shoot herself, maybe it was just never meant to go right. Either way, Abby and Colin are gone, and I don’t think I’ll ever see them again. If I’m quiet for too long I swear I can hear that chewing echoing in my ears.

I did get paid though. Dunno by who considering how very not alive Duncan is, but I just got the money wired into my account today.

I guess Abby didn’t want my time wasted on what probably would’ve been an okay movie, had not most of the cast got murdered and eaten by her boyfriend.

[fisherrprince]

HEY. HEY PLEASE ELABORATE ON BLAINE IN SPRAWL. HEY

so imagine something for me

Imagine a REALLY big robot, like many many skyscrapers tall, on a desert planet, very very old and grown over, but alive, and it has water and electricity for you for free so long as you keep it alive and happy. You build your society around it and keeping it alive because it is not that hard to do, it just needs someone to pilot it, so someone goes and pilots it (and that door stays shut for two hundred and forty seven years, and we all pretend we’re not worried about that because the electricity still runs), and you get water and crops going (in the desert!) and power and a livable house.

Two hundred and forty seven years later, the power shuts down.

The pilot is dead (you bury her and someone grave-robs years later and she hasn’t rotted at all). The big robot needs another, it can't run without someone in the driver's seat. But it doesn’t want some random guy. It wants its pilot back. It nearly kills the person you send to take that position temporarily because it understands how to work with Its pilot, Its friend, not him. It doesn't understand. You need its pilot.

You cannot perform necromancy, but you can cheat to survive. Thousands of years later society still runs on this infinite renewable energy robo-god, but we have figured out that in order for it to run, the pilot must be willing to give up the rest of their life. The pilot must be capable of handling the neural load of a million-ton synthetic system. And! Most importantly! The pilot must act exactly according to script.

That’s not great PR. Let’s only publicize the noble parts, okay? You could make a religion out of this. You do. It becomes tangled when they realize you can use it to justify some things.

You are now Brain. You’re in the program that trains pilots with your friends, you’ve been a disciple for at least ten of your eighteen years, and you are very good at what you all do! You’re proud of yourself. Even if you don’t become Candidate, the pilot, even if you don’t make it there since there’s only one of those every few hundred years, you’re on track to becoming a Foreteller, one of the actual leaders of society (Candidacy is an important, but ultimately figurehead, position. Pilots don’t legislate, really). You all go through the graduation process to the next class up and receive chips that will allow you to converse directly with the big robot — the Divine, let’s call it by Its title.

And then everyone else in your class seems to hear something you don’t.

Let’s get this clear; you can hear when It says “stop”. You can hear when your trainer says stop. But you don’t have to stop, when you hear it. Your friends will stop when commanded. Something went wrong, with you.

This whole agency and self-determination thing sends you into a spiral and you are determined to keep the fact that you’re 100% your own person to your darn self as long as possible.

(Your friends are fine. They’re not mindless, that’s cruel. Remember: a pilot is a person, but a person acting according to a script. Foretellers, which you will be if you’re lucky, are people acting according to their wills. You are playing dangerous games).

You have to leave. You have to leave a place there is no leaving because everyone chose to be here, everyone knows what’s happening, everyone is fine with it. You have to leave a place where the only way to leave at this point in your journey is to die. You should have left last week. You didn’t know last week.

You, however, are very, very smart. You are a clever, lucky, stubborn brat.

You leave.

It’s a long story. It involves convincing your friends to come with you without getting the deity or your trainers involved. It involves a loooooot of secrecy and quite a bit of learning code, surprisingly. You need to make your friends hear what you hear, which means making their chips work like yours. But you leave, in a mech you had one of your friends hijack for you (he’s useful, even if he’s a little spacey these days, he’s a class above you and having deity in your head 24/7 is a little disorienting, you imagine, and suddenly hanging up the phone a bit more so).

And then you crash.

:/

There’s other cities, aside from yours, that don’t appreciate a military vehicle flying straight into them. You were going to leave the planet, but escaping the sights of a very large robot is very hard, even if you left while it was asleep. It’s not anyone’s fault, it almost worked. So you crash, angry at yourself, and your friends are gone, and you will die, but.

But.

The one who finds you wants what you have. What he wants, he says, is to let everyone hear what you do. What he wants is to carry out what is basically revenge on your behalf. (What he wants is to show the world you had been following a false god. That you don’t need to do any of this, really, he knows the truth, he can show you, you can show everyone. You are dying though. You don’t stick around for the details). All you have to do is give up the thing in your head.

You have yourself a deal. You die. You haunt.

[immaturityofthomasastruc]

Gabriel Agreste: Interesting Villain, Horrible Character (400 Follower Special)

I'm honestly surprised more people didn't want me to talk about Gabriel, especially with how often I rag on how horrible of a person he is. But, three character analysis posts later, and we're going to talk about why the main villain of Miraculous Ladybug is a real letdown.

Gabriel Needs to give the Whining a Rest

The interesting thing is one of the few things I actually liked in Season 3 was Hawkmoth. His plans actually made sense (for the most part), and by playing the long game, he managed to turn Chloe against Ladybug and deprived her of several key allies. Granted, Season 4 immediately undid the latter, but I was still impressed by his strategy.

Generally, one of the better aspects of Gabriel as a character was just how over the top he was as Hawkmoth. Keith Silverstein is clearly giving it his all with his performance, and he is just so enjoyable to watch as a cartoonish supervillain.

And therein lies the first major problem with Gabriel as a character. While he is fun to watch as a simple supervillain, the show tries to give him more depth and unintentionally makes him worse.

In Season 2, when it was revealed that Gabriel was Hawkmoth, many fans speculated on what he needed the Miraculous for, until the Queen Bee Trilogy showed it was to save his possibly dead wife, Emilie. The idea of that is so the show can give more depth to its main villain, and I think it's an interesting idea in concept. After all, the road to Hell is paved with good intentions.

The problem is just how radically different Gabriel is normally compared to how he is as Hawkmoth. He always goes on about how he's “doing this for Emilie”, but it's hard to really sympathize with him when you consider he constantly gives evil monologues and evil laughs, really getting into the supervillain role. And let's not forget all of the “I'm going to wear Ladybug's skin as a suit” faces he loves to make.

Clearly this man is the picture of mental stability.

Gabriel's motivation for being Hawkmoth when compared to what he actually does as Hawkmoth is shady enough, but the thing is that the writers clearly want the audience to at least feel a little bad for him. They want to make the audience sympathize with him despite the way he acts with or without the mask. Without Miraculous Ladybug, he is routinely putting innocent lives in danger and never once shows regret for his actions. All he talks about is how “he's doing this for Emilie”, or that “he'll get their Miraculous soon”. There's no real reason to feel bad for him other than “because the script says so”.

Let's compare Gabriel to Malcolm Merlyn from Arrow. His big plan in the first season of the show is to create a machine that will cause an earthquake to destroy a crime-infested portion of Starling City, claiming to be trying to help everyone, but it's clear he is only doing it out of revenge for his wife getting killed by a criminal from that part of the city. In addition, throughout that season and future seasons, he always makes sure his plans lead to him benefiting in some way, showing he isn't just some noble man trying to achieve his goals with a less than noble method.

If we got some moments that showed that what Gabriel was doing was selfish, it would make him a more complex villain. But we don't get anything like that. What do we get instead? Well...

I Could Really Care Less About Emilie Agreste

We have known Gabriel's motivation has been to save his wife for a little over two years at this point, but at the same time, it's hard to believe that motivation because of how underdeveloped Emilie is as a character.

There have been a total of two lines in the entirety of the show that explain what happened to Emilie, and they're both vague as hell. One of them was from “Feast” that implied Emilie used the broken Peacock Miraculous.

Adrien: My mom used to have dizzy spells… just like Nathalie.

And the other that outright tells the audience what's happening to her in a clip show that most people will skip.

Nathalie: As I've watched Emilie falling deeper into an endless sleep, my sadness for her has deepened, too

That is literally all we get for an explanation, and nothing else. We have no idea of what she's like as a person or what her relationship with her family was like other than Gabriel and Adrien saying they miss her. Other than the way the narrative says she's important to Gabriel and Adrien, we don't really have a reason to care about her as a character. There have also been some lines that imply she went along with Gabriel's questionable parenting techniques, like how he was apparently only homeschooled as a kid (Origins) and never had a birthday party growing up (The Bubbler), so how do we even know if she's a good person? In fact, why not set up this question as a mystery to make the audience wonder if Gabriel has another reason to bring Emilie back?

It ultimately turns Emilie into a plot device and not a character that Gabriel and Adrien only bring up to make the audience feel bad for them, and meant to justify Gabriel's actions by saying that he's “doing this for his family”.

But hey, if he's doing this all for his family, surely Gabriel's redeeming traits come from his relationship with Adrien, right? Right?

As a Parent, Gabriel is Far From the Best

I've talked about this briefly before, but parenting in Miraculous Ladybug is written in such a black and white way, even by the standards of this show. Parents are portrayed in one of two ways. They're either amazing people who love and support their children unconditionally, or they're awful people who treat their own children like trash. And much like a lot of things in this show, there are times where the latter is treated like the former.

There are so many times where the narrative insists on making you see Gabriel as a troubled, but wellmeaning person who tries his best to be a good parent to Adrien, but it is far from the truth.

I'm not going to beat around the bush. Gabriel is a terrible parent. Like, he is awful at being a parent in so many ways, even before you find out he's Hawkmoth. In his first appearance, “The Bubbler”, he delegates getting Adrien a birthday present to Nathalie, his assistant. He literally can't be bothered to take time out of his schedule to get his own son a present for his birthday. And as the show goes on, he becomes more controlling and forbids Adrien from going out with his friends in other episodes (Captain Hardrock, Silencer). While this could be used to show Gabriel getting worse, it's never acknowledged in-universe, with Adrien continually defending his father essentially keeping him on house arrest.

“But IOTA!” You might say. “Gabriel has made efforts to bond with his son in some episodes.” While that might be true, most of those come right after his Akumas have almost gotten Adrien killed. He only hugged Adrien and made an attempt to learn more about him after Simon Says invaded their home, he only decided to watch that movie Emilie was in with Adrien after Gorizilla nearly dropped him off a building, and he only hugged Adrien again in public after he was turned into a gold statue by Style Queen.

In fact, let's talk about how Gabriel acts in the Queen Bee Trilogy. He actually decides to quit being Hawkmoth, but it's not because he realizes all the damage he's caused. Instead, he gave up because his “magnum opus”, a stronger than usual Akuma that only got the advantage on Ladybug ironically because of dumb luck, failed. Sure, he says he can't keep putting his son in danger, but he rarely ever acknowledges that he does so in the first place. When Riposte wanted to fight Adrien, Hawkmoth did nothing to stop her other than giving her a stern warning earlier on and nothing else. Where was this attitude earlier?

Hell, even then, he immediately goes back to being Hawkmoth as soon as he sees an opportunity, not even a day after his “mAgNuM oPuS” blew up in his face (because I guess Scarletmoth was just Plan B). If he made such a big deal about caring for his son, why didn't he try harder to spend time with him? Has he ever had doubts about what he's doing before? If Chloe didn't show up as Queen Bee, was he going to follow through on his promise and try to be a better father to Adrien instead of trying to get Ladybug and Cat Noir's Miraculous?

And yeah, the whole irony is that Gabriel is doing this for his family when he is unknowingly fighting his own son, which could lead to some interesting drama if done right. The idea of how Gabriel would react to his son being Cat Noir could really lead to some internal struggles for him to go through. But then we got “Cat Blanc”, which shows just how terrible of a character Gabriel is.

In an alternate timeline where he found out his son was Cat Noir, what does Gabriel do? Does he try to steal Adrien's Miraculous while he's sleeping? Does he reconsider his actions or realize he was endangering Adrien's life?

NOPE! He just decides to akumatize him all while emotionally tormenting him, before causing the end of the world.

This is honestly one of the most appalling things I've ever seen in any TV show, because it's basically an abusive father ordering his son to listen to him all while referencing his (kind of) dead mother to back up his point. And rather than use this to show how despicable Gabriel is, the episode decides to blame Marinette for this happening. Yes, according to the show, her present to Adrien caused several events to happen which caused Cat Blanc, but this logic makes no sense. It's like blaming the JFK assassination on the man who sold a gun to Lee Harvey Oswald, instead of, you know, Lee Harvey Oswald.

Not only was this episode yet another excuse to blame Marinette for something that wasn't her fault, it leads into the biggest problem I have with Gabriel as a character.

Sympathize with Gabriel? Surely, You Jest

After everything I've gone over regarding Gabriel as a character, after all the awful things I've talked about, are you really surprised that I don't feel bad for him at all?

Gabriel is just an awful character and a despicable human being, but the show just keeps wanting me to feel bad for him. It's just so hard to when you consider everything he's done has made him anything but sympathetic. I'm just saying, it's kind of hard to feel bad for someone who tries to start World War III with the only justification being “i'M dOiNg It FoR mY fAmIlY”, especially when he treats his family like crap.

The writers go out of their way to show how horrible Gabriel is as Hawkmoth/Shadowmoth, but they think because they throw in a few moments where he looks conflicted, we'll immediately feel bad for him. What makes so many people interested in seeing Chloe become a better person is that they can tell she's the victim of a troubled upbringing, and know that because she's only a teenager, she still has room to grow as a person, represented by having more honest moments of vulnerability. Gabriel is a grown man who once caused the apocalypse because of how terrible of a parent he is, and has even fewer sympathetic moments than Chloe does. Which one of these two is supposedly irredeemable? The answer may surprise you.

But the frustrating thing is that this kind of villain could have worked. Instead of making him this mustache-twirling psychopath, show how much Gabriel regrets what he has to do, but keeps pushing onward despite all the lives he's risking if it means that he can save his wife. Instead of making Gabriel like Lex Luthor, make him like Mr. Freeze, who is basic a better written version of him.

But as it stands, there's a good reason why Gabriel gets little to no respect as a character in the Miraculous Ladybug fandom, as a villain, or as a father.

[zi-i-think]

Practicing

Pairing: Jade West x fem!reader

Rating: SFW

Word Count: 1800+

Warnings: mention of drugs

Request: no

AN: I know I’m still not done with requests, but I just really wanted to get in a Jade West oneshot. I don’t think Jade is out of character all that much, but I’d love feed back.

          Things sucked. Like. They royally sucked.

         When Beck and Jade broke up for the second time, it felt like a dark, ominous was looming over the group of talented teens. No one needed to be a genius to realize that both Jade and Beck with miserable. Not just because they were no longer together, but the breakup was emotionally draining.

         And despite it all, y/n couldn’t help but feel a little bit hopeful. She and Jade had been friends since middle school when Jade pushed a boy off his seat because he was bullying Y/n. They were pretty different. Actually very different personality-wise. Y/n was what Jade described as a hippie fairy. Which contrasted Jade’s vampire personality completely. 

         But there were just enough similarities to keep them together. Their hatred for the patriarchy. Interests in a feel-good green herb. They both started practicing Wicca together. And they were killer on the mic.

         It was a fine balance. 

         And over the years, Y/n couldn’t help but fall for the girl. Snarling personality and all. 

         She still recalls when Jade and Beck started dated. How at first she just thought she was annoyed at how Jade didn’t spend as much time with her but later realized that she was indeed feeling jealous.

         She knew it was terrible to be glad they’re no longer together, but she couldn’t help it.

         The first thing she saw when she approached her locker was the dark clothed girl waiting for her; standing cooly against the wall of lockers.

         “Morning.” Y/n greeted her with a smile. Jade hummed her greeting in response, waiting for her friend to get her things from the locker. “How you doing?” Jade sent her a glare, knowing that Y/n what trying to get her to talk about the breakup.Y/n mumbled a “nevermind” and closed the locker.

         “Do you have plans later?” Jade grumbled as the two started to walk to Sicowitz’s class.

         “Uh, yeah. I’m finishing up my script for my play.”

         “The one about the girl who turns into a dragon and then the prince who’s supposed to save her kills her on accident.”

         “That’s the one,” Y/n finger-gunner. “I’m trying to figure out how to make the finally really pull at the heartstrings.”

         “Make it gruesome,”

         “I’ll make a note of it.” 

         The class was already about to start by the time they entered and most people were engaged in their own conversations. Y/n saw Jade and Beck make eye contact. The same longing look on their faces. But stubbornness kept either of them from saying anything.

         “Hey, uh do you want to come over? Help me with the play?” Y/n asked, getting Jade’s attention again.

         “Sure. It’s not like I have any plans.” Jade shrugged before taking a seat upfront.

         Y/n smiled and took the seat next to her friend. A nervous feeling in the pit of her stomach grew as she already started to expect her friend’s arrival.

         “Good day, class!” The eccentric teacher barged into the room. “Your a pack or wolves engaged in a dance party!” He announced, prompting the teans to get up from their seats and act out the prompt.

         Knock Knock Knock

         The front door of Y/n’s house sounded. With a furrowed brow and her hair still wet, the girl opened the door revealing Jade with two coffees

         “You’re early,” Y/n stated the obvious.

         “Only cause I got bored. Now you want your coffee or not?” The dark haired girl outstretched her arm to hand her the tall cup.

         Y/n smiled appreciativly, taking the cup and stepping to the side.

         “Alright. So what does your play need?” Jade asked, already getting down to business. She walked straight to the living room and plopped herself on the blanketed couch.

         “Well, uh. It's mainly the last scene. Where the dragon turns back into a maiden and the prince realizes what he's done.” Y/n described, sitting next to Jade and grabbing the laptop from the coffee table.

         “Ah, so it’s angsty.” Jade smiles and leaned closer to Y/n to get a look at the document with the script.

         “Yeah.” Y/n’s voice cracked as she tried to compose herself over her friends close proximity. “So, I was thinking that once he realizes his mistake, he holds her close. I want him to have a monologue. Describing how he'd never get the chance to talk to her, see her, you know typical human relationship things.”

         “Alright so what's the problem?” Jade asked, not seeing why Y/n needed her there. Not that she was mad, she loved being around her. And truthfully, she missed hanging out and not having Beck in the back of her mind.

         “It just feels like it's missing something. You know.” Y/n said with a tinge of frustration in her voice. “Like. There's something that isn't making the plot complete enough for him to have that monologue. He loves her, but it doesn't feel like he does enough.”

         Without warning, Jade took the laptop from her lap.

         “I’ll read it.” she grumbled. “You go dry your hair or something.”

         “Good idea.” Y/n agreed, leaving the couch and beading back to her bathroom.

         “And order a pizza!” She heard Jade shout.

         It didn’t take long for Y/n to dry her hair and put the pizza order in. And by the time she got back into the living room, Jade was finished with reading over the script. Instead, she was now holding her new pair of scissors and examining the blades.

         “Figure anything out?” Y/n asked, getting the girl’s attention.

         “Yeah.” Jade put down the scissors and turned her body to face Y/n as she came in and sat down. “Your characters don’t kiss.”

         Y/n month dropped and she bit her bottom lip awkwardly.

         “Well, I was thinking about putting one in, but I thought it would be better if there weren’t one. Think about the symbolism behind it. Without the action, it’s expressing how the two never truly experienced being together.” She explained.

         Jade hummed and nodded as if she were understanding.

         “That’s stupid.” she said. Somehow both calmly and aggressively. Y/n furrowed her brow and tilted her head. Asking without words for Jade to go on. “Y/n the script is good, the storyline is paced well, blah blah blah. But the only thing that isn't good is the way you're presenting that they are in love. You want the audience to be heartbroken for the guy, show them that he loved her.”

         “Okay, so, where do you recommend it goes?” Y/n asked, grabbing the laptop and scrolling through.

         “Obvious. Scene 4, during the confession, I think after she falls from the tree.” Jade said. Y/n quickly went there and read it over, thinking about how to go about it.

         “You don't think it's a little fast?” Y/n asked, twisting her face as unsureness creeped into her mind.

         “Course not. You've already presented their infatuation for each other, and after that scene their relationship is already escalating more quickly. If anything it makes more sense.”

         She was right. Y/n knew it. But she couldn't shake the fact that having this discussion with Jade felt unreal. Perhaps because Y/n was crushing on her, but also because while Jade was very knowledgeable in entertainment, relationships were more of a ‘on the surface’ knowledge.

         Typing quickly the placement of the kiss, Y/n let out a heavy breath.

         “And it’s in.” She announced mainly for herself.

         “Good.” Jade nodded, now smirking at her friend. “You wanna see how it flows with the scene?”

         Y/n kept scrolling down the document to the ending, avoiding looking at the vampiresque girl.

         “Uh, ” She cleared her throat to avoid cracking her voice. “What do you mean?”

         “Well do the scene, me and you. As then you can make the final choice on whether you like it or not.” Jade explained casually.

         “Yeah, okay. We can do that.”

         Despite sounding calm and nonchalant on the outside, Y/n was screaming on the inside. Surely Jade wasn't actually intending on kissing her right? They’d work up to it and then stop, right? No kiss?

         “Cool, I'll be the guy and do you have it all memorized?” Jade started, grabbing the laptop and placing it on her lap.

         “Yep, it's all in my noggin.” Y/n knocked on her head awkwardly, receiving a disapproving look from Jade.

         “I’ll start at the beginning of the confession.” The dark haired girl announced, reading the lines. Then she looked up, right into Y/n’s eyes. “Tell me, Ayleth, do you feel what I feel.”

         “Why, I'm not quite sure what you mean, my prince.” Y/n continued, swallowing her nervousness.

         “When you look into my eyes, do you as well feel that fire? The one raging inside of your heart and coursing through you. Making you think illogically, wanting nothing more than to be consumed completely by you.”

         “One shouldn't think illogically. One must think about their duties, their-”

“That wasn't the question.” Jade acted, her usual roughness and anger dropped as she said her lines. “Do you love me?”

         “I suppose it would be unwise to try to divert the conversation.”

         “Most unwise. Especially to your prince.”

         “Well. Yes. I believe I do.”

         There was silence between the two. This was where the kiss was written. In the quiet, they both seemed to be questioning whether they would actually kiss or not. They both leaned in, slowly but surely. Y/n’s heart sped up and she wondered whether Jade was feeling the same. No, of course not. It's part of the scene. She's just acting, obviously.

         The inches between them soon turned to fractions of an inch. And their lips were so close to meeting.

         Knock knock knock.

         They were interrupted by the door. “Y/n pulled away immediately.

         “Pizza. I’ll get it.” She chuckled nervously and got up.

         “They can wait.” Jade said instead. She grabbed Y/n’s wrist and pulled her back down on the couch.

         Before Y/n knew it, Jade placed a firm kiss on Y/n’s lips. Though shocked, Y/n quickly reciprocated the kiss. Jade placed her hand on Y/n’s cheek, while the other girl’s hand went to Jade’s waist. By now, Y/n’s heartbeat was going a million miles per minute and both girls forgot about the person waiting at the door.

         Until they knocked again.

         “Give us a minute!” Jade shouted angrily before turning back to her, uh friend? Y/n was giggling at her rage over small things like that. Jade noticed not only that her dark blue lipstick had smudged onto Y/n’s face, but that she also had a deep red blush that covered her face almost completely.

         “Should we practice again?” Jade asked instead of bring it up. And when Y/n nodded, she didn’t waste another second to lean in again, kissing her with more depth than the one before.

[beepboop358]

My Byler theories/predictions for S4

Since s4 is already confirmed to not be the last season, I don’t think Byler will officially get together in s4. I do think that we are definitely going to get a large amount of Byler’s development in s4 though, we just aren’t at the finish line yet. Since Byler has been being developed all through each of the seasons, I think the writers are playing the long game with Mike and Will. I really appreciate a queer romance that is so well developped, especially in something so popular! I think the season will end on a note where it’s understood what Mike has been struggling with, It’s made known that Will is gay, and that Mike has feelings for Will, and Will has feelings for Mike.

My predictions/theories for Byler in s4:

Mike might be acting a little off at school and Dustin is going to notice his odd behavior and ask what’s up

I think Mike will be getting in trouble at school and at home (based on whenever he doesn’t have Will/El around he does stupid things - like graffitti the bathroom wall, plagiarize essays, curse at adults, etc.) I don’t know if Mike knows about Eddie dealing drugs, but he might and he might get drugs from Eddie and do them to cope with everything he is struggling with. His parents might ground him for doing drugs, and forbid him from going to visit the Byers, and then we could get our runaway smalltown boy montage! LOL

Lonnie might come to visit the Byers in California for Will’s birthday. He will probably show up because he thinks they have money now, or he wants to sue Starcourt like he wanted to sue the quarry in s1. Mike will also be there visiting for Will’s birthday. Lonnie will mock Will and make fun of him like he always did, but he will also hate Mike. Lonnie will definitely notice Will and Mike’s dynamics and he will definitely comment about it. He might even call them homophobic slurs like we know he used to do with Will when he was younger. Lonnie will probably make Will cry and Mike upset. Lonnie might possibly “out” him and Mike before they are out and confirm it themselves. Some of the movies on the stranger writers twitter for s4 also hint at this, as well as having the baseball references. There are also hints to Will’s birthday throughout the show: The rainbow happy birthday mug seen in the crazy together scene, the “sorry i forgot your birthday card” in Will’s room from Lonnie, and Joyce’s speech in the shed discussing Will’s 8th birthday and his “rainbow ship”. Jonathan also mentions how Lonnie made him kill a rabbit on his 10th birthday and he cried for a week after, just more hints that if Lonnie shows up for Will’s bday, it’s gonna be bad.

Mike might get Will a watch for his birthday. This would reference the clocks being central to the s4 plot, and “not wanting things to change/turning back the clock” in Hopper’s letter

Will is being homophobically bullied at his new school again, possibly references to Will having HIV/AIDS because the height of the epidemic was in the 80’s and it was very stigmatized

Mike will call Will more than he will call El. Will might be slightly surprised by this, El’s frequent calling will annoy Mike and he might turn off his walkie talkie. (basically the reverse of what Mike said would happen in the s3 ending mileven scene)

Mike and Will will be in the same location for most of the season, like s2. They will not leave each other’s sides for the majority of the time they are together.

S4 Group Predictions:

- El, Will, Mike trio together with Jonathan and Argyle. (we will get some obvious tension between El, Will, and Mike, and Mike will hate Argyle at first)

- Robin, Steve, Erica, Max, Dustin, Lucas, Vickie, Eddie, Nancy

- Joyce, Murray, etc?

- Hopper and the other Russians (Dimitri, etc)

The rift between Mike and El will continue to grow.

When Mike comes to visit, she will notice he seems much more interested in Will.

El will ask why the bullies call Will those things (queer/fairy/gay/homo, probably f slurs too), what it means and if he really is “a queer”.

I don’t know if Will is going to come out to El. They have never interacted before, and I doubt Will trusts her or really likes her much mainly, because of Mike. Unless they get super close during the time not portrayed on screen between s3 and s4, or by being all each other has in California, I don’t know if  he will come out to El. I could see this going either way depending on how their friendship develops. I definitely do not think Will is going to tell El he likes Mike, even if he does confide in her he is gay. I think she will find out eventually but in some other way, probably just from Mike’s behavior towards Will.

El will eventually realize she doesn’t actually love Mike and let go of the ‘romance’ aspect of their bond, but still highly value him as a friend.

Mike might be called homophobic slurs at school as well. Mike will definitely be teased (regardless of his sexuality) because he is in the hellfire club and since satanic panic is sweeping the town, people look at D&D as if it is a satanic game, and he will be teased because of that.

Based on the leaked bts pics, I have a theory a cheerleader, or someone else, might show interest in Mike.  Mike will not reciprocate and she will call him out for it asking why he doesn't like her because “any other guy at this school would” or something like that, maybe even ask “what are you gay or something”. It would certainly be good for Mike’s narrative but idk if it will happen.

Will may confide in Jonathan about his feelings for Mike and the things the bullies say to him at school. Jonathan will be supportive of Will, as will Joyce. I think he will also try to protect Will from Lonnie and they will both defend Will to Lonnie.

I think we need a scene of Mike with his Mom telling him to follow his heart, like who you like, etc. because life is too short to waste it being miserable or something like that. This could be inspired by Mike’s parents seperating, but idk. This could also encourage Mike to initiate more romantic things with Will.

I would love to get a scene of Will confronting Mike for “Joining another party”, after Will said he wouldn’t.

Will and Mike need to discuss what was said in their fight.

I think since Mike's been holding in a lot of turmoil and struggling with his sexuality for so long we might get a small breakdown scene from him, of him telling Will he’s really sorry for how he treated him last summer, and for all the things he said to Will. Mike will profusely apologize and also hint at how he’s confused and been dealing with a lot.

I think Mike will be the first one to break down and confess he has feelings for Will and has been struggling with coming to terms with his sexuality.

Once Will has confirmation Mike is also struggling with his sexuality, Will might come out to him. I would love for him to reference the fight being like “You were right. I don’t like girls.” (from @itsonlystrange ‘s 4x07 byler script it’s so good!) I don't know if Will will confess he likes Mike to his face or not. I don't think it's likely given how shy Will is and how afraid he is of Mike not reciprocating, but who knows.

Mike may initiate a kiss between him and Will - towards the end of the season probably (eyewitness parallel - explained in my byler proof google slides)

I think Mike and Will might write letters to each other, with some love-y connotations. There is a lot of evidence for this in the canon comics of them writing notes to each other, and that cryptic tweet from stranger writers twitter with a blocked out message and the date Will went missing saying it wasn’t about a couple or hopper. Maybe byler related? This tweet may not be a letter but it might be. The most popular theories are that the message is to Will, “love mike”, which I love. https://twitter.com/strangerwriters/status/1184945905973153792?lang=en

Will has a new haircut (bts pics) and Mike will gush over it. Maybe some gay-panicking too hopefully

I think El will be either physically or at least emotionally distant the entire season from the other kids (again following the pattern of even and odd seasons) El needs some personal development this season, since she didn’t get any in s3.

El might confront Mike and ask if he is gay and if he likes Will, which could be El’s motivation to go off on a journey of her own to learn more about her own life. I don’t think it will be a huge fight, but El might make some references to him always lying to her. I think Mike might just kind of try to talk his way out of it at first, but he will eventually break. This might be a two part discussion and Mike doesn’t admit she is right until later. I don’t think it makes sense for El to be heartbroken (explained in my byler proof slides), just slightly annoyed. This is based off of the movie Tootsie which they borrowed the “gift” idea from in s3 already. In the movie, the girlfriend then after receiving the gift asks “Michael” if he is gay.

I really think eventually El will realize it’s okay because she doesn’t love him romantically either, and once she realizes that her own personal development can really begin.

I think we will see a noticeable change in Mike’s demeanor. I think Mike will mainly just be trying to hide that he is gay now. He joined the hellfire club so we know he’s playing d&d again meaning he is reverting back to his true self, not the weird act he put on in s3 trying to be straight and change himself. He is still struggling, but he knows he likes Will. Regardless that doesn’t mean he is going to be super clear about how he feels. He is going to be extremely afraid of opening up and then getting hurt by Will. He will probably do some of his usual ‘lead Will on and then shut it down’ thing. And I really want Will to call him out on this. This could also lead to Mike breaking down in front of Will and confessing. I think we are going to get a lot of 'Mike gay panicking' moments, he's going to be extremely afraid of being found out/suspected.

Byler things I really want to happen that we may get because they would have narrative significance:

I really want flashbacks to those 3 months of summer between the starcourt explosion and the Byers moving, of moments between Mike and Will when they hang out alone together, with some obvious romantic tension. Like where they are super playful and almost kiss, or they are kind of touchy, or something in the realm of that. I think we need a flashback of something that explains Will’s flirty nature at the very end of s3 with Mike, because he doesn't normally act like that. I want noticeable “is something going on with them?” vibes. This could also happen during the thanksgiving/christmas flashbacks.

I hope we get flashbacks of Mike going to the Byers for Thanksgiving, and the Byers coming back to Hawkins for Christmas. Preferably of some Mike and Will moments that hint at Mike’s confusion or how he feels “so alone” without Will, maybe with some “crazy together” references too! I’d also love some tension between the 3 of them, maybe this is when El starts to get suspicious of Mike liking Will.

Hopefully we get some shots of Mike biking past the byers old house and going to look at castle byers and reminiscing.

I’d love to get a flashback of Mike the day the Byers moved away, of him crying or being upset, alone in his room/basement while looking at Will’s drawings or pictures of Will and him together. Mainly to confirm for people that Mike was upset about Will moving, not as much El.

This one does not seem super probable, but it is a very popular theory. Idk if it’s possible because of location logistics, but if they spend enough time together, I’d love for Mike to get to know Robin better, and Will too. Maybe once everyone comes together at the end of the season, she will notice their dynamics and could help guide and inspire them to be themselves. Hey maybe thats for s5 :) But I do think it’s a possibility that Mike may work at the video store with Steve and Robin, and she will pick up on Mike’s behavior and understand, whether she communicates that to him or not.

[ninyard]

Heeey what do you think was that made Kevin finally leave the nest?

I wrote like a 2k word fic-of-an-answer to this one my friend but I wasn’t vibing with it! So I’m starting again. But same thing as the last draft of this answer; I think about Kevin leaving the nest ALL THE TIME

~

(“Keep mouthing off like a pair of fucking frogs.” Riko spat in English to them both. When Jean shut the door, “Do you think you’re better than I am?”

“Your ego will kill you someday.” He looked Riko in the eye. “I think you care too much about other people’s success to make yourself look better. You’re building your Court,” Kevin swallowed hard, still trying to hold his head up, gravity failing him as he started to tremble. “But you think it’s just guaranteed you’ll be on it.”)

~

Mandatory CW for The Breaking Of A Hand and Kevin Has Nothing To Live For. See also: the foxes are foxes and their lives are Fucked Up (suicide mention, overdose mention, panic attacks & drug use)

Okay.

Let’s. Talk. About. Kevin.

Idk if I’m allowed to say that Kevin is an underrated character. I really don’t think I am. But if I was allowed to say that I WOULD. I am so very passionate about Kevin I would absolutely die for him and he’s not even real. So let’s talk about his hand.

Can you even begin to imagine what was going through Kevin’s head that night? It looked like practice, then The Master talking about potential, then Riko is mad, then pain and blood and how do I get out of here? Then is it worth it if my life is over?

I think there probably was a minute where Kevin sat alone, covered in his own blood, just thinking there was no point in being alive anymore. His playing hand didn’t really look like a hand anymore, his life and reputation and everything he had worked for just pumping out of his hand and staining his shirt. He didn’t remember passing out but when he came to Riko was gone, and his body was running on fumes trying to keep the pain from overwhelming his system. He probably threw up, all over the locker room, his blood trickling through the tiles, the echo of his own screams ringing through his ears like a non-stop siren. He probably couldn’t really see properly for a little bit and he probably couldn’t move for a while, either. Riko was a foot shorter than him, but he made up for that difference by channeling every ounce of anger and jealousy he felt for Kevin into his feet to stomp the shit out of Kevin’s hand until he knew he would never play again. Jean found Kevin not long later, maybe a couple minutes, or an hour. Kevin begged him to get Riko out of his room. Jean wrapped Kevin’s hand up as best he could, and promised him to deal with it as long as Kevin was there when he got back. Jean had figured he was a flight risk, and knew if Kevin left, Riko’s French personal punching bag would come in handy to take out all his egotistical frustration on. Kevin promised he’d be there when Jean came back. Jean came back to his jacket and wallet missing, a tiny scrap of paper left on the bed, an almost illegible ‘sorry’ scrawled across it. He burned it in the bathroom sink before Riko could find it.

So Kevin’s in his car, and he’s driving. He doesn’t know where yet, and man, is he a hazard. Twice on his journey he nearly knocked out behind the wheel, his head bobbing as the pain begged his body to sleep. He probably had to pull over a couple times to be sick, or to have a panic attack, or both. I know he went through the stages of grief on that drive to Virginia. He probably turned on his radio at some point and laughed, how ridiculous he looked, how dangerous it was to be driving one handed. It took him double the amount of time it would normally have because he just. Had to keep stopping. There’s no way he made that journey in a solid drive.

But also I think he probably didn’t have a plan before he was driving. He knew the Southeastern district were holding the Christmas banquet that night, but that was a secondary thought. His first worry was getting out of the nest. His second worry was whether he was going to kill himself or not. The reason he didn’t just do it? David. The thing that pulled Kevin back off that metaphorical ledge was Coach David Wymack. The only other people who knew about his moms letter were Tetsuji, Jean and Riko. Kevin knew well that none of them would be calling up to break the news to Wymack if he died, and David would grow old and die without ever having known that Kevin Day was his son. David was the reason he was risking everything on busy streets and highways and whatever roads he drove too fast or too slow on.

So, he’s in Virginia without a plan. He doesn’t know what hotel David’s in, if he’s even still in Virginia, if the foxes even bothered to show up. So he looks at as many hotels as he could find. He narrows down the list by looking at the ones he knew the Class I teams frequented, and he called the all pretending to be David, looking for his rooms number. After the fifth call he found it.

Think about Kevin’s anxiety in the elevator, hand throbbing, not profusely bleeding anymore, but every minute that passes is a percentage off the chances he has at keeping his hand and playing again. His heart is racing, his head heavy, every fibre in his being screaming.

David calls out a “Hold your fucking horses, give me a minute!” when Kevin knocks on his door a second time after his first knock received no answer. David opens the door with Abby just behind him, and his face falls so quickly it could’ve hit the floor.

“Kevin.” He looks him up and down, not yet noticing the t-shirt covered in blood he had wrapped around his hand. “Kevin Day. Mind telling me what the fuck you’re doing here?”

Abby pushes past him to unwrap Kevin’s hand. It must be some nurses instinct, to be instantly drawn to looking for an injury on a person. Kevin pulled it back as gently as he could, looking up and down the hall before asking so quietly it almost couldn’t be heard. “Can I come in?”

David makes small talk with Kevin as he shuts the hotel door behind him. What would he say? What could he possibly say to superstar Kevin Day, who he’d only officially met as a baby, when his mother was alive and he wasn’t destined for Court? He probably tried to make meaningless, awkward small talk until Abby shut him up to ask Kevin what happened. He just started to cry. Small whimpers into chesty, heaving, heavy cries, his body teetering on the edge of a panic attack. David had seen his foxes in bad ways before. He’d seen one of his kids convulsing on a stretcher after an accidental overdose, or a fox who’d choked on their own vomit after an intentional one. He’d seen his foxes in their worst moments, panic attacks and withdrawals, anger and sadness, pulling their hair out and on the brink of death. Something about this was the same but different. When Seth first overdosed on the team it was a cry for help, or when Janie admitted herself to the psych ward for a week, it was because she wanted to try. When Damien asked for a second, and third, and fourth chance David gave it to him because that was what Foxes deserved. It took him a moment of watching Kevin heave, snot and spit running down his chin, his hair falling over his face, his body shaking with anxiety, to remember that Kevin wasn’t a fox. Kevin was a Raven, and by god, that was so much worse.

I think we all know that Abby cares for her foxes like she’s their mother, but Kevin is just different. Abby had been seeing David long enough to know how much Kayleigh Day had really meant to him, and how much it hurt to watch Kevin do her proud. Now Kevin was sitting in front of her, his hand practically lifeless, his heart pouring out of every place it could. She tried not to look at David’s face as he paced the room, watching her patch up Kevin’s hand as best she could. Kevin only started to calm down when she handed him a bottle of Diazepam and some water.

And then Kevin whispers that Riko did it. David almost didn’t hear him. He nearly asked for him to repeat it until it hit him. Riko did it. Riko smashed the hand of his number two so badly it would take a long time for him to play again, if he even wanted to. Abby sent him a deathly glare when he mumbled to himself; “I’ll kill that little jumped up piece of shit”.

The rest is history; Kevin passes out not long after, David carries him to the bus, and they drive to the stadium to pick up the foxes. Kevin sleeps the rest of the way until the sun is starting to rise and they’re back in South Carolina. Kevin doesn’t stop crying on and off again for a couple days, and Abby had to hold him back from escaping more than once. After watching his anxiety consume him, and when he told her none of the Ravens were allowed to be medicated in any manner, she got him a script for some quick-acting anxiety meds for him to keep. It took him a week of energy-sapping panic attacks before she could convince him to actually take them as he needed them.

David took out a loan five days after Kevin had arrived into his care. He called Edgar Allan on the sixth, and the seventh, and the eighth day. By the ninth day Kevin was released from the grips of Ravens. By the tenth day they had started the process of making Kevin Day a fox. I suppose it’s for the best Riko fucked up his hand so badly, isn’t it? At least it gave him the ability to fit into the eligibility criteria for being a Fox. Welcome to the club, Kevin Day, and prepare to be gravely disappointed.

[tbmaybank]

New To Town (6)

(Gif credit to whoever made it; I’m sorry I’m not sure who it was)

Warnings: mention of abuse; court case.

A/n: there will be one more part to this! I hope you all have enjoyed so far!

Part 5

——————————————————————————

The few weeks leading up to the trial were a blur. But now the day was basically here, court starts at 9am tomorrow morning. I’m currently sitting in lawyers office, as she tries to prepare me for when I’m called to the stand to give my statement.

“Now, the defense is going to try anything they can to rile you up. They’ll ask you questions to try to make you think it’s your fault, which it’s not. Are you prepared for that?” The lawyer asks.

“Yes, I think so.” I replied, wishing I didn’t have to do this. Which, I guess I technically don’t have too, but they told me that it does help the chances of a guilty verdict.

We spend the next hour going over my story, starting at the beginning of our relationship, and everything that led up to this incident. We run through possible questions I’ll be asked.

“This boyfriend of yours… JJ, correct?” I nod. “They are going to ask about him, I can almost guarantee that.” I kind of figured that. They were having him come to the stand too, since he’s the one who found us that day. “There was nothing going on with him before you left Scott, correct?”

“No, I didn’t meet him until after I moved out.”

“Good… good. They’d definitely try to use that as ammo.”

Eventually, we were finished for the day. As prepared as we can get, as she put it. She went to the door of her office, and told Sarah I was ready. Sarah has been helping out as much as she can, whenever JJ wasn’t able to, she was right there. I could never thank her enough. When you have a broken leg, and a broken arm, getting around becomes pretty tough. Can’t walk, obviously, and crutches are out of the question. So until I’m healed up, I’m in a wheelchair. That I can’t even work by myself, cause like I said; broken arm.

“How do you feel about tomorrow?” She asks once we’re in the car.

I shrug, “I think, that no matter what we say or do, he’s gonna get out of this.” This was the first time I’ve admitted this fear out loud.

Sarah nods slowly, understanding why I would think that. “It’s a fear of mine too, y/n. But I hope we’re wrong. He deserves to rot in there for what he did.”

We pull up to the Chateau, and John B comes over to help get me inside. He’s been letting me stay here since the incident, the stairs leading up to my apartment just being a major hassle.

“JJ should be here any minute,” he says. “How did it go today?”

“In the words of the lawyer, we’re ‘as prepared as we can be.’” I tell him as he helps me get situated on the couch. He nods in return, and then pulls out a blunt.

“Want something to ease your pain a little?” He asks, wiggling his eyebrows.

“God, yes.”

JJ gets there when we’re about halfway through smoking. “Hey baby.” He says, leaning down to kiss me. He takes the blunt from me and takes a couple hits. “You feel ready for tomorrow?” He asks as he sits down.

“I don’t wanna think about it. I just wanna enjoy tonight.”

And so we don’t talk about it. We spend the night laughing all together. While tomorrow didn’t completely leave any of our minds, we pushed it as far back as we could.

————————

*The Next Morning*

If I wasn’t stuck in this chair, I would be pacing the hallways at the courthouse right now. But I can’t. So instead I’m sitting here, tapping the food I can move repeatedly on the floor, trying to slow my breathing down. JJ takes my hand, giving it a small squeeze.

“Baby, it’s gonna be okay. You don’t even have to look at him in there. I’ll be sitting in the front row. Just look at me.” I nod, thanking him. “By the end of this, he’ll be in jail for a very long time.”

“J,” I say while sighing, “I really don’t think he’s going to be.”

He looks confused. “Why do you say that? He almost killed you, y/n. They’re not just gonna let him walk.”

“He’s loaded, J. You know people like him don’t ever actually get in trouble.”

He looks at me for a second, like he’s trying to find something to say.

“Y/n? We’re ready for you.” The lawyer interrupted before he could find the words to say.

JJ wheels me into the courtroom, and up to the stand. Thankfully they had one I could just wheel up too, and didn’t need to try to get into a different chair. He gives my hand another quick squeeze before going to sit. I’m trying hard not to let my gaze fall onto Scott. I can’t let him get into my head. Not again. Ever again.

I almost feel like I’m on auto pilot as I answer the questions thrown at me. Feels like I’m reading from a memorized script as I tell the story on how we got here. These are the questions from the prosecutors side though, these are the ones I rehearsed over and over with the lawyer. But when it comes time for the defense attorneys questions, I’m scared. I have no idea what they’re gonna ask me.

“Miss y/l/n, you said the defendant came into your apartment uninvited, correct?”

“Yes.”

“He tells us that you opened the door for him, though. Is this true.”

“I opened the door expecting my friend, not him.”

“He also states that you slapped him. Is this also true?”

I hesitate for a second for a second while answering this one, “y- yes. But-“

“And was hitting him something you did often before you left originally?”

“No. This was the first time.”

Why are they focusing so much on one slap, when I’m sitting here with broken bones? I think to myself. Eventually he does move onto a new subject. JJ.

“You told the defendant that you had a boyfriend. Was this a relationship that started while you were still living in the defendants home?”

“No.”

“But you did start this relationship up fairly quickly after leaving, correct?”

“About 2 months.”

“And the defendant, he just wanted you to come home, is that what he told you when he came to your house?”

“Yes, and I refused.”

“I see,” the lawyer says, turning to face the jury now. “I think it’s clear what happened. Our defendant here, never wanted to harm y/n. He wanted his fiancé, the woman he loved, to come home. And she chose a man she barely knew over him. This was, at most, a mistake made by a man with a broken heart.”

I turn to look at JJ after he says this. I can feel the anger rising up in me. It’s okay, he mouths to me. No. No it’s not okay.

“He didn’t love me.” I couldn’t stop myself from saying into the mic, getting the attention back from the attorney. “He loved controlling me. He took joy in making me feel pain, in every way he could. You don’t hurt someone, especially to the point of this,” gesturing to my casts, “if you love them. You don’t almost kill someone by beating them, if you love them.”

The lawyer smirks, and looks to the judge. “No further questions, your honor.”

JJ comes to wheel me back, and then it’s his turn to take the stand. Luckily they don’t hammer him as much. They ask him what happened, what exactly he saw when he when he walked in the apartment that day. What happened between him walking in and the cops arriving.

Eventually, they were done questioning him. The jury was sent to discuss a verdict. JJ brings me outside of the courthouse while we wait to be called back in to hear what they decide. The rest of the Pogues are waiting out there for us, and all of them give us hugs when we come out.

“I brought you guys some food, thought you might be hungry. Sarah said neither of you ate much this morning.” Kie says, handing us a bag of takeout from The Wreck.

“Thank you, Kie. You’re too sweet.” I say to her, taking the bag.

I start eating while JJ fills them in on everything that happened. I try to join in and act normal, but I just can’t. I just keep replaying what that lawyer said to the jury. Scott was not heartbroken. And he didn’t make a mistake. I just really hope I’m wrong, and he actually doesn’t get to walk.

After a little bit, the rest of the group goes back to the chateau to give me and JJ some time alone together.

“You know, even if he doesn’t go to jail we’re gonna keep you safe, right? You’ll still never see him again.” JJ says as he takes my hand in his.

I nod, “I know, I just don’t want him doing this to someone else.”

“I don’t either. I know you don’t feel confident about this but I do.”

I give him a smile. “You really are amazing, you know that?”

“Y/n? JJ?” We head, making us turn our heads, “it’s time.” Instantly my hands start getting shaky. JJ kisses the top of my head before wheeling me back in. We stay in the back of the room, and I say it’s because of my chair, but in reality I just don’t want him to be able to see me. I know I should be listening to what’s being said in the room right now, but I can’t focus. JJ has his arm draped around my shoulder, and I brought my hand up to grab his.

The man standing in the jury section finally grabs my attention as he says 4 little words.

“Guilty on all charges.”

[orionshounds]

I’ve been knee deep in dsmp lore streams and I just want to ramble about it

Dream smp lore is so good, it’s so good!!! Not only is the story itself just fascinating, but how it’s presented so uniquely through the medium of minecraft of all things is just so cool. One of my favorite parts of the lore is seeing how everyone on the smp has their own “style” they present it in, and watching them find the way they find the most enjoyment in is so cool. Literally no two streamer’s lore stream quite like each others and it’s just incredible! It just speaks to the flexibility of roleplay as an artistic medium and really shows everyone’s individual personalities. 

Wilbur was dramatic as hell and wrote eloquent speeches. He started a drug operation under the guise as a country, and it lead to a revolution in which he was able to explore the spiral of a man who loses control of everything he had built. And after his arc and he wanted a break from the server? He created ghostbur, an amnesic comic relief with just enough touch of tragedy that he is still able to make heartbreaking monologues when he wants to.

Tommy is able to run around with his friends and cause as much chaos to his heart’s extent, but there is so much more than meets the eye. He is incredibly social and isn’t afraid to start conflict with a lot of people, bringing them into the roleplay. He doesn’t back down from storytelling either. His character goes through terrible situations and he fully explores the trauma that comes from those experiences. His character goes against the “stereotypical” trauma I see alot in media; instead of being shy or scared he’s reactionary, he’s angry, he’s violent, he’s depressed. I’m actually really impressed with the heavy subject matter this 17 year old teen has managed to portray (I’ve connected with it quite personally at certain points), while still being able to keep the light hearted fun that’s so intrinsic to his personality. 

Tubbo isn’t really interested in serious lore as much. Even in dire moments he tells jokes and just has fun. So, in his recent lore, he just streams as normal while putting mysterious writing on screen that he doesn’t acknowledge or have to explain, which I think is just a genius work around for him to participate in lore. He still has his dedicated lore streams sometimes, and when he is in the acting zone he has some of the most powerful moments out of everyone on the server.

Ranboo, while having stake in the greater smp lore, is much more character focused. He presents his lore through long monologues and fucking heart-wrenching voice acting. He loves working in themes of horror and causing a specific feeling in the viewer. So he chooses specific music as a themes for events/characters and creates visual queues in his overlays to draw out that desired reaction. He also values improve a LOT, if something unexpected comes up he just runs with it and he has made huge changes to his lore as early as 30 min before a stream.

Technoblade, while arguably one of the most powerful people on the server, prefers a more light-hearted yet dramatic approach to lore. When Dream was at his house looking for Tommy, Techno had no problem joking around and making fun of him for being homeless. He tore down an entire nation on the server and had so much fun doing it! He’s more of an antagonist than a true villain in my opinion. And lets not forget how dedicated he is to the game, he’s cracked at the craft. He spends hours grinding and creating farms on the smp, for amazing pay offs (his several vault reveals, the withers, etc), most of which weren’t even on stream!

Karl Jacobs is extremely social, so he created Tales from the smp as a way to involve TONS of people in lore while exploring the past and future of the server (it was also a way for viewers who weren’t that well versed in dsmp lore to join and not have to worry about it!). And through this premise, he took the opportunity to develop his own character on the smp; making an incredibly tragic story of a time traveler trying to save his home while slowly loosing his memories. Not to mention the beautifully shot cutscenes of the Inbetween and the Other Side. He includes so many people behind the scenes as well, collabing with other members on lore, hiring building teams and people to make intros and credit scenes, and promoting fanart and fansongs from the community!

Quackity explores his lore through heavily scripted events and amazingly shot cut scenes. While the way he expresses his lore comes at the cost of improv, the payoff of the visuals and story is well worth it! The shots he makes of the smp is downright gorgeous, no to mention he’s the first person to include irl footage in his lore (not counting facecams)! He’s not afraid of thoroughly examining his own character, being one of the only people I can think of that shows us “past events” leading up to something that has already happened.

Badboyhalo, Antfrost, Ponk, Skeppy, Captain Puffy, Punz, Awesamdude, Hannahxxrose all work together on shared lore and the payoff is amazing! By introducing the Egg, a constant antagonistic force that constantly pulls on character’s relationships with each other, everyone is able to stream together to battle for or against the egg! There’s also plenty of room for people to do individual lore that's more intimate to their respective character. They spend hours changing vines, putting up posters, slowly shaping the smp in a way that makes it exciting to watch streams to see just what has changed everyday. Because there’s so many people necessary to tell the egg’s story, it does comes at the cost of time (the egg has been around FOREVER). However, they all work together super hard and I just admire their commitment to the story they’re trying to tell!

And Sam! He has several different “Modes” his character is in (and an entirely separate character, Sam Nook) that he gets to explore lore with. He’s a terrifying warden, he’s a money motivated businessman, he’s a conflicted lover, he’s a traumatized victim of the egg, and just so much more. Through having so many different “roles” in the rp he gets to explore relationships and plotlines with a whole array of people. Not to mention he’s absolutely cracked at redstone and has some of the most impressive builds on the server.

And Puffy! So much of her lore is calling into question the morality of the server and really makes you step back and think critically about the characters. Her character also has, in my opinion, one of the most interesting relationships with Dream, the main antagonist of the entire server, which is just fascinating to watch unfold. Not to mention she’s one of the first people to start exploring the backstory of her character!

George doesn’t exactly do lore. In fact he’s slept through so much of it it’s become a meme. And you know what? That mad man took that and ran with it. He explains his absence in the story by having his character literally being asleep through it, creating mystery where there used to just be an absence. He’s able to goof off with his friends and have borderline nonsensical streams, then at the end sucker punch the audience emotionally by “waking up” and have the viewers question just what was real and what wasn’t?

The smp has the freedom for people who want more independent lore to be able to explore their character’s that way as well!

Hbomb, Connereatspants, and Purpled don’t have a lot of lore on the smp, generally only coming on to have fun with everyone, but when they do have their moments it unfolds in very interesting ways!

Sapnap, Eret, and Schlatt maybe aren’t as active as some other people, but when they are on they actively participate in lore and have lasting impacts on the story (Ex: Eret’s betrayal, Sapnap’s visit to dream in the prison, Schlatt becoming president).

Philza mostly does his own thing, improving the server or making some bomb ass builds. He has incredibly devastating roles in lore (killing wilbur, blowing up L’manberg for the final time, starting the syndicate with Techno), but he also has quieter moments that speak to the depth his character has, such as fishing with fundy or reminiscing about his dead son and how it went so wrong. Like Techno, he doesn’t like to take lore completely seriously, often laughing no matter what’s happening or teasing chat after something big goes down, but his character is solid with a lot of potential for future lore.

Foolish has only started on his character and its already super interesting. The hints at his dark past as a “god of death” and his current conflict with the egg are intriguing as fuck. Not to mention the MASSIVE builds he does for everyone, helping to progress their lore as well.

Fundy has a lot of freedom with his character to participate however much he wants in lore. While generally he’s a trickster who loves to prank people he has enough tragedy build into his backstory he’s able to break the viewer’s heart with a flip of a switch. Not to mention his recent, almost surreal, stream that explored his character’s disturbing dreams that may or may not predict the future.

Niki is very character driven, exploring her character's grief of losing her best friend and her anger of being ignored in the very country she helped create. She has incredibly emotional moments, and even though she’s on her own building an underground city she still participates in other lore via teaming with jack manifold or the syndicate.

Jack Manifold’s lore is VERY character focused, and while he’s described his story as a “B plot that occasionally intersects with the main plot”, the story he tells is still fascinating. Being pushed aside not taken seriously his whole life, his character develops into a fun cartoony-esque villain who begs to be taken seriously, that has the depth of a truly conflicted person who is torn between wanting revenge on everyone who’s done him wrong and just wanting a friend.

Last but not least, the man himself, Dream. The most fascinating thing about his lore is that absolutely none of it is from his pov. All we know about his character is only from what we see from everyone else’s povs, and in his case it leads to a very intimidating villain! Not to mention, mans owns the damn server and yet has made himself the main antagonist! He is the only character I consider a “true villain” on the smp. His voice acting and writing is downright sinister. I could write a fucking essay on how his character’s obsession with power has led him to the point he thinks himself an unstoppable god

Everyone on this server is stunning and I love all of them!!!!!

[bonesandquills]

Two Sides (Darkiplier x Reader, Part One)

Warning: Angsty fluff. I took waaaay to many liberties with this story, but I hope you guys like it.

No specific gender, I think. If you see something that changes that please let me know and I'll fix it!

You had been living in the manor for quite a while now. How you got there was a matter up for debate, but debate among the inhabitants of this place usually ended with an injury and some blood. You assumed you had wandered in, but you didn't quite remember...

In any case, that didn't matter. You were as much a part of this place as Dark, Wilford, Yancy, or any of the others were. They accepted you like family, some more than others. Mark, the tall dashing owner of the manor, was the most warm and welcoming. He was referred to as 'Actor' by most of the others, and they seemed to keep out of his way. You didn't quite understand why, he seemed kind. A little egotistical, but he was always looking after you, asking how you were feeling or if you wanted anything.

You didn't ever quite understand the reason for this place, or the sort of work that Mark and the other egos did. You knew that they never strayed far from the manor.

You were on pretty good terms with just about everyone except Dark, with whom you had no terms at all. He was aloof, cold, haughty, and went out of his way to avoid contact with everyone unless it was absolutely necessary. When he spoke, his tone was quiet and melancholy, devoid of most emotion. You knew he wasn't human, most of the people here weren't. Still, he seemed odder than the rest. Maybe it was his red and blue aura that flared up when he was angry. Maybe it was his sense of always being a few seconds ahead of himself, as if he was reading a script and remembering what to say next. Maybe it was.... it could've been anything, really.

You knew, subconsciously, that he was a villain. That's what Mark had told you.

"Darling," he had said, using his favorite name for you. "I need to speak to you about something important."

You had looked at him curiously, waiting for him to continue.

"I want you to stay away from Darkiplier. He's dangerous. He's nothing but a villain, and that's all he'll ever be. He'll try to take you, try to manipulate you, and I don't want to see that happen to you."

Sure, Dark had a temper, but you'd never seen him do anything inherently evil. Still, you supposed Mark knew him best and you trusted Mark. You didn't go out of your way to avoid him, but you didn't try to seek him out either. He didn't really seem to like you either, so it all worked out.

Until... it didn't.

You started to notice things, things you would have let pass by a few times, but they continued to happen, and finally you had to admit something was wrong. Mark had been acting... wrong. He said everything as if it were a memorized line, but sometimes he would slip up. After one of these, he'd disappear into his room and refuse to speak to anyone, even you. This made you feel hurt, and alone, and you started spending more time in the Manor's library.

What had happened to your sweet, lovable Mark? Why did he now does add much time as he could away from you? Why could he now not meet your eyes?

With these thoughts running through your head, you didn't quite watch where you were going when you stepped out of the library, and crashed into someone very cold.

You stumbled back, close to losing your balance, but were stopped by a chilled hand grasping your upper arm.

"Are all humans so clumsy?" Dark said in his quiet, rumbling tone. "Or is it just you?"

You looked up at him and scowled. With Dark, you are never sure if he was teasing or actually just an asshole.

"I'm not clumsy, you ran into me."

He gave a small minuscule tilt of his head. "No. You crashed into me because you," He brushed past you into the library. "Were simply not watching where you were going."

You scowled and walked off.

Later, you ran into him in the hallway. Not literally this time, just a simple chance encounter. You made fun of the disorganized bundle of papers in his arms and he replied with some snarky remark. You grinned and parted ways.

And so this continued. You would find him in the library, or wandering the corridors, or simply sitting in the garden, all things that you liked to do. Slowly, but surely, your conversations with him became longer, further than just exchanging pleasantries. You grew to find yourself thinking about him when he wasn't around, not in any romantic sense, but just that he was someone new to talk to. You made a more conscious effort to find him, to engage in conversation.

Slowly, eventually, after many months of tentative acquaintanceship, he began to do the same. He would join you in the library, or simply accompany you on one of your walks outside the manor. He couldn't stay away long, but what time he could he spent with you.

The reason he gave, always, was that he was bored. He had nothing else to do, so he might as well spend it with you, pathetic mortal that you were. But you knew him better than to accept that as his reason.

Everyone else in the Manor was terrified of him. Not that you quite blamed them, he made quite a daunting figure. Still, you didn't mind his outward appearance, and he found that... fascinating. Comforting, perhaps.

Maybe, for all his cold resentment towards anything living, Dark just wanted someone to talk to.

"Are you even listening?"

You snapped out of your thoughtful stupor. You were walking next to Dark through the Manor gardens, and had gazed off while he was talking.

"Sorry, Dark, I wasn't paying attention."

"Obviously. So what's on your mind?"

You paused. "Nothing important."

"You, dear, are a terrible liar," He said nonchalantly. "And I hate liars. Try again."

You gave a short laugh. "I was just thinking about Mark."

You paused as you saw him tense, his eyes darkening slightly. When he saw you watching the look disappeared as soon as it came.

"Oh? And... what about him?"

"Has he been seeming... off, to you?"

You thought you heard him scoff, but maybe you were imagining it. "No, I hadn't noticed."

"Oh... well, we used to be sort of a thing, you know? I was really close, and now I think something's happened. He just seems like he's uninterested and he spends a lot of time just avoiding me. You work with him, has he said anything?"

You looked at him expectantly, but he only sneered.

"Me, work with him? Only because I have to."

You raised an eyebrow, confused. "What do you mean?"

"You must have noticed. I can't go far from the Manor."

You nodded. "Yes, you're connected to it. Mark said something about your death-"

Dark turned to you. "And how exactly did he tell you I died? What extravagant lie did he make up for you this time, hm?"

You furrowed your brow, surprised by this sudden outburst. "Mark.... Mark wouldn't lie to me. He would never."

Dark's black eyes bore into yours, but there was no malice there, not any that was directed to you at least. "Of course he wouldn't. So what did he tell you."

You gathered your thoughts, growing more doubtful by the moment. "He.... he said that you got shot. That you make William angry and he shot you."

He looked at you. "Anything else?"

"No, he said that you were brought back by the Manor."

Dark sighed and rubbed his head. "Another one..."

You did a double take. "What do you mean, 'another one'?"

"Another romantic partner, another lie, another story."

"Another... partner?"

Dark gave you a grin that seemed more sinister than reassuring. He started walking again, in his wide-paced stance and his hands behind his back. You didn't follow, thinking that this was one of his signals, meaning he didn't want to talk anymore. At least until he paused and spoke without turning his head. "Are you coming?"

You hurried after him.

"Everything you know about Mark is a lie," he said bluntly, without giving you any time to react or interrupt. "You are not the first person he has brought to this place, not the first one he has charmed with his lies." He took a deep breath. "This place is far, far older than you believe, and so are all of us. We all died several years ago."

You nodded. So far, you followed.

"We, however, were not the cause. Mark may paint himself the hero, but he is far from that." As he spoke his words grew lower and more laced with ringing static. "He killed all of us."

"But.... Wilford's not dead?"

"Yes, he is. As dead as all of us, but it didn't happen here. That's not important."

"Long ago, Mark married a woman named Celine. He was entirely devoted to her. He gave her everything. But she betrayed him, and cheated on him with his best friend, his brother. Wilford."

You felt your heart pang. Having been cheated on before, you knew how that felt.

Dark continued. "The betrayal sent him mad. He decided to get his revenge on everyone, even those who had nothing to do with it."

"What do you mean by that?"

He growled lowly. "Have you heard talk of a man named Damien?"

You nodded silently.

"He was Celine's brother. He was the Mayor of this town, before the world came crashing down around us. He didn't have anything to do with Celine and her cheating, but Mark directed all of his wrath... at him. His second brother."

"He sought to make himself the hero of the story, his broken mind not being able to comprehend the terrible things that he was doing. In his thinking, he was doing right, and we were the villains. He faked his own death, and one by one took the rest of us."

He didn't want to seem to go into detail, and you weren't going to push him. There would be time for that later, and you didn't think that this was the right state to be pushing Dark into.

"I was... forced, into this body. I share it with three other souls. I was given the anger, the means, to be the villain. So..." He spread his hands in a 'what you see' gesture. "Here I am. The villain."

Your head was spinning and everything seemed loud. "So... why did Mark bring me here?"

Dark smirked. "Don't you know? Ever hero needs a damsel in distress."

"Distress? I'm not in distress."

With these words, Dark held his head. He mumbled something under his breath, something you couldn't make out. When he looked up, any trace of the kindness or softness you had previously seen in him was gone. He gripped your wrist almost painfully, and dragged you close to him.

"Are you so sure about that, darling dear?"

[nutty1005]

Exclusive Visit of 72 Hours! Full Record of “A Dream Like A Dream” Behind the Scenes

Original Article: https://mp.weixin.qq.com/s/yI4arm9P9nJwE3RMSUW-5Q Original Author: 杨晋亚 Translator’s note: The original author is part of Yuli Studio, this article is published in Yuli Studio’s Weixin Official Account on 23 Apr 2021 as a part of “Behind the Screens” Volume 640.

On 22 Apr, “A Dream Like A Dream” Wuhan Charity show was still in the midst, countless related topics were already on Weibo Hot Search.

This is probably the hottest play on the internet till date.

A big intellectual property that lasted for 21 years, and now with the addition of the hottest celebrity, debuted for the first time as a Charity Show in honor of the heroes of the pandemic last year, “A Dream Like A Dream” contained stories on stage and backstage.

Before the official start of the play, Yuli Studio walked into the backstage of “A Dream Like A Dream”, and entered the dream in advance.

“A Dream Like A Dream”

Celebrity Cast

On 19 Apr noon, 15 minutes before the first full dress rehearsal for “A Dream Like A Dream”, there were not much audiences, they were all in the lotus pond seats.

Overall producer Wang Keran was suddenly notified that there was someone recording secretly, he immediately called the executive producer Da Shan to check, who had already expressed multiple times that audiences were not the take pictures. Wang Keran face turned gloomy, loudly accused Da Shan of incompetency, stood up, “Trusted friends who are currently seated, I hope that everyone would protect the actors, stop filming.”

Afterwards Wang Keran told us, his anger then was actually “for show”, that situation needed him to make a stand, scold Da Shan so as to alert everyone else, “I needed to kill two birds with one stone, control the scene, protect the actors.”

Xu Qing, Xiao Zhan, Zhang Liang, Huang Lu… the addition of many celebrity actors, caused the interest in “A Dream Like A Dream” to increase.

Protecting his actors, was something that Wang Keran always did ever since he built this group.

Yanghua Theatre and Baoli Theatrical Center collaborated and did some massive and intricate work, in order to ensure that protection project was as per usual, “The theaters put in a lot, the meager profits that this project is giving them, can’t completely cover their massive investment.”

Wang Keran also helped to block countless signature and photograph requests for Xiao Zhan, his good friend had came from afar to Wuhan just for a photograph with Xiao Zhan, but Wang Keran did not agree, “I promised a clean creative environment for my actors.”

The “A Dream Like A Dream” group tried their best to give all the actors an equal, harmonious creative environment, and in here, there is no celebrity actor Xiao Zhan, only Patient No. 5 B.

In the backstage of the Wuhan Qintai Theatre, the plaque on the door of Xiao Zhan’s resting room was not labelled “Xiao Zhan”, but “No. 5”.

Director Chen Limei and Zhang Rui said that the group did not treat Xiao Zhan specially as a celebrity; Actress Huang Lu, who portrayed the role Jiang Hong, had the most scenes with Xiao Zhan, she said that everyone was just actors.

Privately, Xiao Zhan would treat Huang Lu fruits, as well as recommend good motives to her, Huang Lu said, working with Xiao Zhan was not much different from working with other partners, the only difference was that there were suddenly a lot of Xiao Zhan fans leaving messages on her Weibo, most of them were messages of encouragement and support.

“A Dream Like A Dream” , Xiao Zhan, Huang Lu

During the very initial rehearsals, the director closed Huang Lu and Xiao Zhan into a small practice room, in order to cultivate tacit understanding.

“When we were rehearsing the French portion of the play, I knew he was from Chongqing, I would suddenly use French translated to Wuhan dialect to talk to him, what d’ya wanna eat what d’ya wanna eat, and then he would suddenly reply me in Chongqing dialect.”

Huang Lu remembered, when Xiao Zhan entered the group, he had already memorized all of his lines, the tacit understanding between them were built up within 3 or 4 days, and on the details of the performance, they would also inspire each other.

For example, the biggest reaction from the audience in the Wuhan show was the scene in the Parisian apartment, actually contained Xiao Zhan’s designs, when they spoke the lines “Monday Wednesday Friday Tuesday Thursday Saturday and Sunday”, Xiao Zhan suggested that the two of them would lean their heads on each other, so as to give a better effect.

When the two of them were conversing in comedic Japanese scene, there were traces of the old version of the play, but there were new creativity as well, “Pikachu” was from the old version, whereas “sleeping” was an idea that Xiao Zhan came up with.

“A Dream Like A Dream”, Xiao Zhan, Huang Lu

The duration for “A Dream Like A Dream” was long, the lines voluminous, there was once during rehearsal, one of the actors had a sudden breakage and his lines became more and more scattered, voice lower and lower, that day Director Chen Limei gave him a stern talking to, but in the director’s memory, this problem never occurred to Xiao Zhan.

“Xiao Zhan was very serious, we could all feel that, every night after he went back, he definitely thought through his scenes once more, so that he would not make this kind of mistake.”

Xiao Zhan expressed that his familiarity with the lines had gone to the state that he could say it “whenever”, he was more focused on the “current feeling and the chemistry with his partners.”

Xiao Zhan was very strict with his own expectations, on the 19th after the first full dress rehearsal, there were many audiences who gave his performance good reviews, but he said, “I’m not quite satisfied with today, it wasn’t as good as yesterday.” Although the audiences did not spot any problems with the lines from the scene ”Monday Wednesday Friday Tuesday Thursday Saturday and Sunday”, but after the performance ended, Xiao Zhan himself felt that there were some slight flaws.

“A Dream Like A Dream”, Xiao Zhan

The lotus pond seats in “A Dream Like A Dream” to Xiao Zhan was a challenge, it made it easy for him to lose concentration, and once you had lost it, it would be easy for the scene to scatter, he described, “the feeling in concerts is that you need to interact simultaneously, plays to me meant that I need to make myself lonely”, so he needed to make sure he could ignore the audiences.

Wang Keran invited theater critics to view the play for the 19th’s full dress rehearsal, after the upper half ended, they were exclaiming in praise of Xiao Zhan’s acting, Wang Keran also proudly recommended this newly found actor to people around him: “He had a different layer of creativity process, the first day we’ve finished the script, he surprised me onstage the second day, it was green but came with a lot of accurate instincts. He constructed the character to be intricate and abundant, but yet layered, not just emotional scenes, everyone could burst into emotions, but he was intricate, lively and entertaining, he conveyed the soul of the character, his sense of pace was this good.”

“A Dream Like A Dream” Performance Stage

The story of “A Dream Like A Dream” and Xiao Zhan had to begin with the Cao Yu 110 Anniversary Special Event last year.

In 2019, Wang Keran heard of Xiao Zhan’s name, but he quickly forgot about it. “Then I was in Wuxi, there was a large excited crowd of people, said that the hottest actor, Xiao Zhan, was in there.”

Until 2020, a psychiatrist friend told Wang Keran, to take note of this actor Xiao Zhan.

“Before then I was an older person, I’ve always picked actors above 35, but after the psychiatrist finished talking, I started subconsciously noticing this person, and then I found out that this person was really interesting.

How interesting? There were a lot of people attacking him, I thought I’d understand what these attacks were, I found out that these people were a contradiction of the most realistic things and most hypocritical things, this era’s idols were different from 5 years ago, they are now placed on a pedestal as a symbol, as something to be fought over or stepped upon. Via Xiao Zhan I noticed the new pulse in the development of society, understood this movement, art should be something that is most compatible with the times, my personal view on plays is just like this, plays should be the current drama action of this moment, and the emotional relationship of the people here and now.”

“A Dream Like A Dream”, Xiao Zhan

The commemoration event for Cao Yu, Wang Keran needed to find a young guest who could have a conversation with Wan Fang, a colleague suggested Xiao Zhan, Wang Keran suddenly realized, this was perfect, “The complexity on Xiao Zhan would fully represent the complexity of plays.”

The first time he met Xiao Zhan, Wang Keran captured the mysterious sense of fate behind his back, but yet he also gave a sense of youthful obtrusiveness, gentle and warm. Wang Keran gave Xiao Zhan a list of books and asked him to go back and read, after which Xiao Zhan finished the books in a few days, even wrote some 10 over questions to Wan Fang, the questions were simple but deep, and moved Wang Keran.

On the Cao Yu Commemoration Event, Wang Keran studied Xiao Zhan, and found that his sense of stage was fantastic, and immediately invited him to join “A Dream Like A Dream”.

To Wang Keran, the similarity between Xiao Zhan and Patient No. 5 was that they were both trapped in the uncertainties of fate.

Xiao Zhan’s portrayal of Patient No. 5 gave Wang Keran a pleasant surprise, as to whether he would continue as Patient No. 5 after this year’s shows, they had not spoken about it, but Wang Keran felt that “A Dream Like A Dream” already gave Xiao Zhan some rewards, “I feel that via this play, he can prove that he is a good actor, I feel that ‘A Dream Like A Dream’ gave him a power.”

“A Dream Like A Dream”, Xiao Zhan

Entering the Dream Again

Not only Xiao Zhan was a new addition, the Yanghua version of “A Dream Like A Dream” had almost a brand new cast.

Zhang Liang and Yanghua had collaborated for 2 plays, they were old friends; Huang Lu was recommended by Xu Qing, she was also the only actress that was confirmed without meeting Wang Keran.

Director Zhang Rui was in-charged of arranging actors, but because of the pandemic, the Taiwanese actress who was supposed to play the role of the wife could not arrive, another actress had to take on this role. “A Dream Like A Dream” had a total of 31 actors and actresses, many times one would take on multiple roles, any adjustment of actors would have big ramifications.

Zhang Rui created many versions of the casting chart, “This casting chart was an intricate process, move an actor, we might need to reallocate every scene, whether they could make the scene in time, whether they were suitable, reasonable, I’m so frustrated my hair’s dropping.”

Starting from 2013 when “A Dream Like A Dream” premiered in Mainland China, Director Chen Limei and Zhang Rui grew with this play for 9 years. Chen Lipai previously also handled the role of Stage Executive, Zhang Rui was with the crew everyday, there were the two who were most familiar with “A Dream Like A Dream”.

In their memory, the first rehearsal for 2013 lasted 3+ months, after which if there were not much changes with the actors, repeat rehearsals would last 1 week. Some years they had to change an actor, but yet they did not give sufficient rehearsal time and almost drove the actor insane, “Because the crowd actor had to act as multiple roles, the management of every role was complex, he needed to remember his position, his clothes, and he had to depend on himself, there would be no one backstage to inform him, he had to take care of himself.”

“A Dream Like A Dream”

This year, more than half of the cast was changed, theoretically they needed one and a half months, but to gather 31 actors to rehearse at the same time was not easy, the group merely squeezed out 17 days for practice time.

Practice time started officially from 9 Mar, the group settled in Hebei Tangshan, the time was tight, the mission was heavy.

Lai Shengchuan, who was faraway in Taiwan, gave instructions via video conferencing to the actors, to help answer their questions. Wang Keran, Chen Limei and Zhang Rui handled the task of direction.

Wang Keran mainly handled the mini classes to the new actors to the group, every actor had different classes to attend.

Huang Lu was a movie actress, her method for lines was to say to herself, but “A Dream Like A Dream” was to say them to 1200 audiences, Wang Keran gave her a training method, “He made me rehearse only with Xiao Zhan, each of us would stand at the furthest corner, but we must be able to hear each other’s lines, that is we needed to get used to speaking loudly, I felt that this method was actually quite crucial.”

“A Dream Like A Dream”, Xiao Zhan and Huang Lu during practice

When he first entered the group, Zhang Liang was tortured by the role of the Baron for 3 days, he totally could not find the sensation, Wang Keran gave him 3 days of progressive classes. The first class was to control the micro expressions and movements, “For example, the first day I reached Tianxian Court, he requested that when I did gestures, my hands could not be higher than my chest, when we normally spoke my palm would face up, but he said that the Baron could not have a moment where his palm was facing up, his palm would forever be facing down.”

The second class was culture class, discussing European culture, politics and artistic background, so as to understand the motives behind Baron’s actions. “Baron would not let Xianglan draw abstract art, made her start from still life, it actually had political connotations. Classical realism represented calm and control, whereas abstraction and symbolism, etc, developed from the lowest of the masses, represented the destruction to order, Baron hoped from the bottom of his heart that Xianglan would live with him, if you liked something he didn’t like, that represented betrayal to Baron, that’s where the cracks in their relationship started.”

Chen Limei and Zhang Rui understood every detail of “A Dream Like A Dream”, when the actors gave any small questions, they would immediately solve them.

For example, how to swiftly get into positions, what to wear after changing out, both directors could immediately give the correct answer, “We found that this time round that one of the new actors was slow in moving, he would say he could not make it, I would say you definitely could make it, you tell me why you couldn’t make it, I would know where you did wrong. He said it was very dark and he couldn’t find his bag, and he needed to take the gun from 2nd floor to the 1st floor, I said there’s another prop gun downstairs, you don’t have to carry it down, he said he didn’t know. We actually spoke to him after observing him for a few days, because we knew that the 2nd floor was very dark, we definitely had to ensure the safety of our actors first.”

“A Dream Like A Dream”, Xu Qing, Xiao Zhan, Zhang Liang, Huang Lu, Lan Nan, etc.

The time left for the directors was not much, rehearsal, costume, positions, etc, all had to be done simultaneously, the volume of “A Dream Like A Dream” was supposed to be large, there were pressures on progress, the experience for the whole group was basically demonic scheduling.

For example, for 22 Apr Charity Show, the schedule for the actors that day was like this —

10:30 to 11:30 Actors and actresses would set of from their hotels to the theater for make up and costume; 12:30 Lunch; 12:30 Microphone testing; 13:10 Warm up; 13:30 Audience entry; 14:00 Start of Charity Show.

After nearly 8 hours of performance, when the actors were having their media session it was already 30 minutes past midnight.

Everyday they worked for around 12 hours, that would be the normal hours for the group for the month, during practice they did not wear their make up and costume, but they still had to set out by 12:00, practice starts 13:00, 17:00 was dinner, 18:00 was practice again, and they end at 22:00.

“This time round we really went for it, we didn’t work this hard previously, because we changed very few people then, we could probably get to the practice at 2pm,” Chen Limei said.

“A Dream Like A Dream”, actors practicing

The tight rehearsal schedule was a challenge physically to the actors, as they practiced day and night everyday, even Huang Lu felt lost once.

“Because we would be acting the same thing everyday, everyday when you went in, it was day, but when you left, it was night, that period of time I really craved a normal life. There was once we were video conferencing with Teacher Lai, I just said that after this play, I suddenly feel that plays, movies weren’t that important, what’s important was our real life, I especially wanted to experience communicating with people, the feeling of being with family, friends and loved ones.

When you filmed dramas, you would still be outside, after you knock off you could be in touch with a more realistic life. When I was in the same play group as Zhang Ruoyun, we practiced in Beijing, everyday we practiced for around 3 hours, we could still meet friends in the afternoon and night, but this play was concentrated practice, when we left it would already be midnight.”

“A Dream Like A Dream”, Xu Qing and Huang Lu during practice

Wang Keran could foresee, that actors would experience this type of lethargy, so the arrangement from the very beginning was that after the 17 days of practice, the group would briefly rest for a period of time, until a week before the Wuhan Show, where he would recall them.

This method of working was not easily seen in plays, but to actors, this was a good time to rest and digest.

“The first day we returned, Keran said that was the best time I’ve acted with Xiao Zhan,” Huang Lu said. “Perhaps in-between I had time to digest, get in touch with real life, and had a new understanding.”

In comparison with “A Dream Like A Dream” from 8 years ago, besides the changes in actors, this year’s Yanghua version also shortened the script by around 15 minutes or so, without affecting the foundation of the script.

The adjustment was mainly on the pace of the actors. For example, at the end of the upper half, the housekeeper of the castle would talk about the past of Baron and Gu Xianglan, it used to use a slow and narrative tone, Wang Keran felt that it was not right, “This type of expression seemed to cause Grandpa, who just arrived at Shanghai, to seem unfamiliar with his surroundings, but in fact, Grandpa was very familiar with the castle, he could have returned frequently, like the feeling of a tour guide,” so he adjusted the tone and pace, and made the play richer and more layered.

“A Dream Like A Dream”, Xu Qing, Zhang Liang, Lan Nan

Every improvement in detail, came from written notes from everyday.

When rehearsing, both directors would sit in the middle of the lotus pond, with a small table, and a faint table lamp, the actors would be acting while the directors discover problems and mark it in the script, or write furiously on white paper, after the end of a day’s rehearsal, the paper would be littered with over 200 to 300 notes.

After the rehearsal ends, actors would sit together in the lotus pond and listen to the directors reading the notes one by one, every actor would record down their respective portions.

Xiao Zhan’s phone memo was full of everyday’s notes, for example there were around 10 notes for 19 Apr, Xiao Zhan’s note taking method was simple and concise, note down the scene, or a point, with the remarks of watch out for emotion or pace.

In Zhang Liang’s memory, with regards to his notes, there were up to 20 notes a day, but later on as the problems lessened, the notes also reduced.

Director Chen Limei said, some actors would be confused, why were there always 200 to 300 new notes everyday during the note session, did that mean that they had not improved, but actually everyone was getting better on the basis that they were already getting better.

“A Dream Like A Dream”, the directors at the rehearsal

There was a process in practicing, at the start you might not have memorized all the lines, that note would be about lines, when the lines passed, it could have been about wrong position or movement, at the last part when the acting was getting better, I might notice intricate details such as costume, hairstyle, which you needed to notice carefully. Every stage had its own set of problems discovered, only when you walked from Step 1 to Step 2 that I can see the problems of the current step, otherwise my focus would not be that.”

For example, on the last day before the official show, the note for Xiao Zhan became “the singing before the curtain call, stand slightly westwards” this type of small details.

After experiencing the full dress rehearsal of 18, 19 and 20 Apr, the last day of rehearsal became “note rehearsal”, that is to repeatedly rehearse based on the problems in the notes so as to affirm the scenes that could easily cause issues, including the group scene at Tianxian Court, the scenes between Baron and Young Xianglan, etc. For Xiao Zhan and Huang Lu, the scene they rehearsed was the propless scene around the staircase, which needed to take note of the eye contact as they two of them went up and down the stairs, entering by pushing the door.

After the premiere on 22nd ended, the notes continued, so as to have new improvements for the consecutive shows.

“A Dream Like A Dream”, Xu Qing, Zhang Liang, etc.

Idealism

After the full dress rehearsal ended on 19 Apr, all of the actors gathered backstage, surrounding the directors, quietly standing, it seemed like a special ceremony.

For the new actors who joined this year, this was their first time witnessing this ceremony, but to the actors who had been with “A Dream Like A Dream” before, this had already became a habit.

Director Chen Limei introduced that this ending ceremony was called “Echo”, it was a habit from Lai Shengchuan — a habit that existed since the first premiere in 2013, “When we finish a show, and gain the applause from our audiences, as well as new empathy for our roles, we must return this feelings out, give them to more people, you can imagine that there was a large crowd of people, we would send out these blessings and share them.”

After “A Dream Like A Dream” came to Mainland China, it had always been well acclaimed, it used to show in Beijing and another specific city. Starting the 9 Cities Tour, especially adding the Wuhan Charity Show, was also a form of “Echo”, to share this play with even more audiences.

“A Dream Like A Dream”, Wuhan Charity Show inside view

2 years ago, in Chongqing Theatre, Wang Keran came up with the idea to get more people to understand theater, experience theater. He started conceptualizing the 9th Anniversary 9 Cities Tour for “A Dream Like A Dream”.

When they heard of this plan, Chen Limei and Zhang Rui thought it was an impossible wish.

“Because ‘A Dream Like A Dream’ was such a large play, we would actually lose money by doing a tour. Such a big group, there’s about 130 people in the group, so many people’s living expenditures, including putting up the set for each location, it takes a week to put it up, only for a few shows.

Until the start of last year, Keran told us that we would still do it, I said we really had to do it? How could we do this in the pandemic? Last year he said that we could definitely do it the next year. This might had to do with his view of life, he would do what he set out to do, just like then when he did his first play, he sold 4 houses.”

In comparison with previous “A Dream Like A Dream”, the investment of this tour was obviously bigger. More touring cities meant that there was more costs with transfer of set, when they rehearsed in Tangshan it was not as good as Beijing, all the actors had to be in Tangshan with their living expenditures.

On the other hand, the seats in the theaters were fixed, there’s a ceiling to the ticket prices, in the face that it was not profitable, Wang Keran included a not-for-sale charity show, “The cost is too high, after completing the charity show, we basically have no profits for this stop,” Wang Keran said.

“A Dream Like A Dream”, Xu Qing and Xiao Zhan during rehearsal

Early last year during the pandemic period, Wang Keran already thought of doing a charity show in Wuhan.

Then, he spoke on the phone with the person in-charge of the theater, and asked about the situation in Wuhan, “He had always stuck to Wuhan, and told me that if you really cared about us, then you should bring your best show over, I asked which one did you mean? He said ‘A Dream Like A Dream’. I just felt that if ‘A Dream Like A Dream’ did not come, it would not fully express our special respect for Wuhan, and we would do a charity show, free.”

The actors had the same idealism.

Wang Keran said, theater would definitely be tough, the rehearsal time was long, and while they would perform for 3 days in every stop, they had to allocate 1 week for practice, a popular artist’s time would be calculated in days, but they were willing to allocate their schedule for the play.

Sun Zhongyi, who played roles such as the old housekeeper and professor, was one of the core actors for Yanghua Theatre, he was given the rare opportunity for a lead role in a movie, it was very important to him, but the schedule collided with one of the shows for “A Dream Like A Dream”, and for the play, he gave up this rare opportunity.

“A Dream Like A Dream”, actors rehearsing.

Plays do not earn as much as dramas and movies, no matter how popular the celebrity is, the profits from plays will never match up with the value of the drama, an actor’s rehearsal fee for “A Dream Like A Dream” is 100RMB a day, but all of the actors cooperated seriously.

Huang Lu said, sometimes we would joke that we “missed money making opportunities”, but everyone felt that this was especially fine, it was rare that we had a whole year to focus on doing one thing, the period where we practiced in Tangshan was very much like return to school.

“Everyone basically didn’t come here for money,” Huang Lu said, she viewed “A Dream Like A Dream” as a rare opportunity, it was a training for acting, also like a chance for self improvement.

After the “A Dream Like A Dream” Wuhan Charity Show ended, Huang Lu came to the front lobby for a photo.

Every actor gave their best performance.

Newly added actress for Young Gu Xianglan, Ge Xinyi, worked hard to match her senior; seasoned actress Feng Xianzhen controlled her character with grace and power, all 3 Gu Xianglan had an overall soul; Zhang Liang performed a Baron who was different from Jin Shijie’s version, but it was still accurate and layered; Fu Xing as the representative of the original group, became the foundation, their steady and down-to-earth performance assisted every new actor in building up their steady and accurate system of performance.

After performing for 9 years, Xu Qing had already embodied the blood and soul of Gu Xianglan, she also followed the progress of the group, and participated in all of the practices. Wang Keran expressed his thanks to Xu Qing once in Tangshan, “I say I really thank you for appearing in the practice, because your every practice would always accurately complete every detail, even if it was the most basic practice, you always put your heart to it, never held back, completely constructing the character.”

Xu Qing constantly improved her performance, frequently discussing how to handle every word with Wang Keran, for example after Baron had his car accident, Gu Xianglan would run up hurriedly to the police to say “I saw your incompetence” that kind of transition scenes, she would repeatedly try different expressions, after 9 years of “A Dream Like A Dream”, she is still pondering over it repeatedly, searching for the best method to handle every detail.

“A Dream Like A Dream”, Xu Qing and Zhang Liang during rehearsal.

During the rehearsal in Wuhan, Yuli Studio also witnessed how Xu Qing gave all of her emotions in every rehearsal, especially the important scene where Gu Xianglan took off her Cheongsam and walked through the lotus pond in sleeping garments, everytime Xu Qing finished that performance, her eyes would be filled with tears.

Xu Qing told Wang Keran one sentence later, and hoped that he would share that with the new actors, “Just tell them this point, 1 minute onstage, 9 years of effort offstage.”

Theater people always had this persistence in idealism and passion for the stage, with so much interest in “A Dream Like A Dream” this time round, Wang Keran hoped that with this play, more audiences would understand plays and love plays.

He especially prepared a live broadcast after the charity show ended, so that people beyond that 1200 audiences could see “A Dream Like A Dream”, hear the words from the actors’ hearts, he hoped that the other actors besides Xu Qing and Xiao Zhan would also be noticed.

“I know that the rules of news broadcast, if it wasn’t live broadcast, you would definitely cut away the people who weren’t important, right, but I hoped that everybody could see everyone’s effort. Xu Qing, Xiao Zhan, they were also very happy to have this method, I think that this is also a faith in collaboration equality built upon plays for them.”

“A Dream Like A Dream” would continue to tour 9 cities, Wang Keran hoped that through this play, it would encourage more youths to enter theaters, “I had this thought a long time ago, I just needed to find the right opportunity. For all of our lives we had hoped that plays would have more influence, could have more people entering theaters, if this worked out, then actors and actresses such as Xu Qing, Xiao Zhan, Zhang Liang etc, would have great contribution.”

[sage-nebula]

I started typing up a post on my opinions of the characters in Neo TWEWY, but when I got to Neku's segment it got so long that I realized it needed to be its own post. So if you want me to elaborate on how I feel they did my favorite boy dirty, head below the cut.

First of all, to get it out of the way: his English voice is absolutely atrocious. Given that he has the same voice actor here as he did in the original, I really don’t know what went wrong. Was Mr Corti mentally checked out and only doing this for the paycheck? Was the voice director high on cough syrup on the days Corti was in the office? Who the heck knows, but it’s bad. Not only is Neku’s voice way too deep (he was fifteen in the first game, he’d already been through puberty, his voice shouldn’t have broken again, it’s not like Beat’s did!), but there was pretty much 0 acting to be found. The closest we got to an actual performance is when Neku yelled Beat’s name a couple times during the chaos that went down at the end of Week 3. That was it. Otherwise, it sounded like Corti was just reading his lines with zero surrounding context and zero effort into actually acting them rather than just reading them while either half asleep or bored out of his skull. It’s supremely disappointing and an honest disrespect to the character. Again, I don’t know if this was because of the voice direction or what, but whatever it was, I hated hearing Neku actually talk and that kills me considering he was my favorite of the main cast in the original game.

Which brings me to the bigger issue, which is his characterization. Neo!Neku has zero personality. I’ve said this on multiple posts, and I’ll say it again. He has no personality. It’s gone. I think that when Coco shot him at the end of “A New Day” she not only killed his physical body, but also any semblance of personality he once had, and honestly it kills me because, again, he was my favorite of the original cast.

To elaborate:

Over the course of the original game, Neku goes from a closed off, snarky, trauma-ridden jerkass to a more open, snarky, loyal friend and defender of those who need it. By the end of Week 3 Neku is open to meeting new people (though he’s not completely open either; as he tells Joshua in his ending monologue, it’s still hard for him, but he’s trying), he’s more patient with those around him, he sees more value in the people and the world around him and he’s learning to open himself up and actually enjoy the moment, rather than just saying he does. Moreover, whereas he was fully ready to kill in order to escape the Game at the start (thank god for Hanekoma stepping in), by the end he breaks down crying over . . . well, everything, but in that exact moment it was because Joshua was hinging Neku’s own life on Neku’s ability to pull the trigger on Joshua, and he couldn’t. Neku underwent remarkable change over the course of the original game and I would never, not even once, say that I’d want Neku in Neo to be characterized how he was at the start of (or even in the middle of) the original game.

However.

There is no semblance of Neku, period, in the character that we get in Neo. The closest that we get to any kind of snarky humor from him is when he asks Beat if Beat died again, and that’s why he’s in the UG. Despite being fiercely loyal to his friends (and despite knowing that Minamimoto is a shady bitch out for himself first and foremost), he says with a smile that Minamimoto has ~changed~ or is ~trying to~ despite having absolutely no evidence of that whatsoever, and walking in on Minamimoto literally trying to murder Beat. He’s BFFs with Coco despite the fact that Coco killed him, purely because her motivations were good, and he chastises Beat for not trusting her even though Beat witnessed that murder and has had to live with it for the past three years. Many of his voice clips don’t sound like him (“well done,” for example, just sounds too proper for him, it doesn’t sound like the way he talks; “nice one” or “good job” would be more appropriate), he’s perfectly fine and not awkward at all with everyone calling him a legend, he seems to have no issue whatsoever with the fact that he’s been trapped in Shinjuku’s UG (or in-between the UG and the RG) for the past three years, and overall it feels a whole lot less like Neku-as-a-character and more like Neku-as-an-exposition-mentor. Like he wasn’t here to be himself, he was here because a.) it was expected because this was the sequel, and b.) he’s the closest to Hanekoma they could get, even though he’s not acting like Hanekoma either.

Here’s the thing.

Yes, it’s expected that Neku would have matured even more by the time this game rolls around than he had by the end of Week 3. It’s expected that, much like Beat, Neku has grown up and changed as a result of that maturation as well. However . . .

1.) Beat is still noticeably Beat despite his maturation, and

2.) Neku didn’t get to grow up in the same way that Beat did, by virtue of being dead and stuck in hell for the past three years.

Neku’s life for the past four years has basically been a rollercoaster of trauma. First, his friend dies on his way to meet Neku, which Neku blames himself for (and I’m pretty sure this takes place about a year before the original game, though I could be wrong on that). Then, while he’s still struggling with processing his grief, he’s murdered by Joshua and put into the Reapers’ Game. He has to go through three extremely difficult weeks with his life on the line, during which he learns to process his previous trauma in a healthier way while getting a bunch of fresh new trauma dropped on his plate. He escapes that Game with his new friends, but then less than a year later he is murdered again, and this time he’s locked in a hellspace where Shinjuku used to be, and not only that, but he is trapped there with his murderer, who is not sorry at all that she killed him and instead believes that it was the right thing to do despite the fact that Shinjuku has already undergone the Inversion and Neku is just stuck there now with the thoughts of the nonexistent swirling through his head. Presumably his powers, which were already incredibly powerful, grow exponentially during this time as a result of the space he’s in, but that’s not really the point. The point is, Neku went through a trauma conga line with no time to really breathe or process any of it, and while I can believe that he came to trust Coco enough so that they could both get out of Shinjuku, I can’t believe that going through all that trauma without any chance to live a normal, happy life would produce a smiling mentor figure who’s just here to blithely exposit without any real emotion, or any of his trademark snarky humor. It’s not realistic maturation, especially because maturation isn’t supposed to stamp out aspects of your personality that make you, you. Just as Beat is able to still recognizably be Beat while also being more mature, Neku should have been recognizably Neku, and he isn’t. If you were handed the script with all the names blacked out, you would never be able to tell his lines were his. And honestly, that absolutely crushes me, especially since I was so excited for him to come back since I love him so incredibly much.

Honestly, I’m tempted to rewrite that last portion of the game so that Neku acts more like himself—so that we can actually hear him instead of this bland exposition fairy they put in his place. But whether I do that or not, just know that I found Neku to be incredibly disappointing, and I think he deserved better on just about every front. The only really good thing about him was his design, and the fact that he still did the fingers-to-temples gesture when he reached out to the minds of Shibuya during the end segment. (I was literally chanting, “do the thing, do the thing!” so I was very happy when he did, in fact, do the thing.) And considering how important he is as a character in this series, that was just . . . so incredibly disappointing.

[didsomeonesaydaddydraco]

It’s just a bad day... » Tom Felton imagine

Request: yes! @lindsayfosselman93

Word count: 2,037

Pairing: Tom Felton x reader

Note: I just hope you guys will like this. xx

“Hey, Y/N” my coworker called after me, just as I was about to leave my office “A couple of us are heading out to grab a drink or two at Casey’s. Do you want to join us?”

I looked at my phone to check the time. It was a Friday afternoon, and our boss said we could leave an hour earlier than usual, knowing that we had a very though week behind us, and all of us deserved a little rest after all. 

“Yeah, sure” I smiled at her and grabbed my bag from my desk “But I’m driving, so no alcohol for me today”

“Alright” she linked her arm with mine and dragged me with her, talking about how hot her new intern was. I liked Beth. She was my mentor when I first started at the PR agency, and helped me with everything I needed. She was very open minded, and loved to ask me about England, and she really enjoyed listening to me, mostly because of my British accent. She found it fascinating “So, how’s your boo?”

I laughed at her nickname for my fiancé. They had met before, and a love-hate friendship was immediately formed between them. Beth hated that I skipped a lot of end of the week pub hopping with them to go home to Tom, but loved to hear everything about our travelling stories and the romantic things he had done just to make me happy. And Tom hated that Beth would show up at our home unannounced, and babbled about her terrible dating life, and how much she already wanted to be married. These occasions usually turned into a sleepover, because she had too much wine, and wasn’t able to drive back home. But at the same time he loved the idea of me having a good friend at work. And I knew, that deep inside, he would have helped her if she needed it. 

“He’s working on a new movie, so he is quite busy” I smiled at her and opened my car “He was up pretty late last night just to learn his lines” I frowned at the memory. He came to bed almost at the same time I had to wake up to get ready for work. He looked quite annoyed and even sad. I was thinking about him, hoping he was in a better mood and slept enough. I hated how much he pushed himself sometimes. He wanted his act to be perfect, to give his best to the project he was working on and satisfy not just his fans, but himself as well. He tended to be hard on himself. 

The pub was quite crowded when we arrived. We weren’t the only people in Los Angeles, who wanted to kick back a bit at the end of the week. Group of friends were playing billiard or were just chatting over a table with beers and wine glasses in their hands. Here and there were couples, maybe on a date. I smiled at a few familiar faces from either work, or at those who were frequent guests at Casey’s and sometimes joined us for a drinking game or just to chat. 

“So guess who’s being a baby and won’t drink today with us?” I rolled my eyes at Beth’s childish behaviour, but I couldn't hide my smile “Nah, just joking. Y/N’s only being a responsible adult here, and is actually driving”

We sat down to our usual table where some of our coworkers were already seated and were sipping on their first drink. I ordered myself a virgin Cosmopolitan and listened to one of our new intern’s story about how one of his professors was caught with his TA. I was sipping on my drink when my phone lit up in front of me. Because of the bad service in the pub, I didn’t get the notifications right away, so I didn’t see Tom’s messages.

“Baby? What time are you coming home?” 

“Are you alright? I thought you were coming home earlier..”

“Y/N???”

“Babe, I need you. I’m having a very bad day…”

I quickly texted him back that I was only out with a couple of friends from work but I was just leaving. I was worried. Tom wasn’t the double texting or multiple texting type of guy. He only acted like this, if it was important or he wasn’t feeling well. 

“Sorry guys, as much as I love to hang out with you, I really need to leave” I stood up and said my final goodbyes to them, not giving them a chance to ask me about my sudden leave-taking. Before I left to go home, I stopped by a grocery store to buy the ingredients for Tom’s favourite comfort food. 

I could see Willow’s cute face at the window when I pulled up to the driveway. She was jumping up and down when she saw me getting out of the car and walking up to the front door. I swear that dog was half a dog, half a kangaroo. 

“Love, I’m home” I called for Tom when I stepped in the hall and kicked off my high heels, which were killing my feet all day. I went to the kitchen and put down the grocery bags, before I kneeled down to pat Willow and give her a few kisses “Where’s Daddy? Can you show me?”

“Woof” she probably had no idea what I was asking her, but the fact that she hardly left Tom’s side came to my benefit, because she ran to Tom’s office. I followed her there, and of course he was there. He was laying on his sofa, the script for his new movie on his chest. The wrinkles of the pages told me he was close to tear the whole thing up and throw it away. He was asleep, but the frown from being frustrated was still on his face. 

“My love” I sat at the very edge of the sofa and pushed his hair out of his face softly “I’m home” I kissed his forehead and caressed his cheek carefully. I didn’t want to scare him.

“Hey” he murmured and pulled me on to his chest. His hands hold me close and Tom buried his face in my neck. I planted plenty of small kisses into his hair and hold him just as tight “I’m having the worst day of my life”

I laughed at him a bit. He could be a little bit overdramatic, when things weren’t going the way he planned. “Mind telling me why it is such a bad day?”

And he did. He told me that because of the lack of sleep he has been having caused him to wake up with a terrible headache this morning, and no matter how much he tried and practised, it seemed like he couldn’t memorise his lines. And when he finally gave up on learning those, he wanted to interact with his fans, but came across with a lot of hate, which led him to ask himself, if he really was good enough of an actor. 

I listened to him. Sinking in every single word that left his mouth, and played with his hair the whole time to keep him calm, and to show him I was now there for him, and was ready to do anything just to make him feel better. He was feeling very down, and it made me sad how his self-esteem shrunk down because of what some mean people and the media was writing about him, without knowing him at all. 

“Darling” I said softly “Did you really have a bad day or did you have 20 minutes where you let your thought run undisciplined which led you to a bad vibe that you let carry you away?”

“What do you mean?” He looked at me confused.

“I let you think about this” I kissed his neck softly, which made him laugh a tiny bit. I knew how ticklish his neck was, and loved and hated it at the same time, when I blow on it or kissed it. It was good to hear his laugh. It was so contagious. So to make him laugh again, I started to kiss it rapidly and blow on it, while I caressed the back of his neck with my fingertips to tickle him even more. 

“Stop, please” he laughed loudly and tried to push me away “C’mon darling, I’m going to pee myself at the age of 33 if you don’t stop” he begged me but never let go of me. I looked at him and kissed his lips with everything I had. I wanted this man to know how much I loved him. I wanted to show him that no matter what those people out there say about him. They didn’t know who Tom Andew Felton really was. They were cowards, using the power of social media. I pity them. How miserable their life must have been that the only thing that made them feel better or happy was hating on someone they didn’t even know personally?

“I’ll let you to think about what I just said” I stood up from him “Meanwhile you do your homework, I’ll make dinner. Come downstair when you are ready. Alright?”

“I love you” his voice was smooth. I adored how he said those words. They were pure, honest and filled with love and lust. I left him alone. I knew he needed it. He had to go through his whole day in a different point of view. He had to think if it was really worth it. Letting hate and a rough day ruin his good mood. Before I started on dinner, I changed into one of his tie dye hoodies and let my hair out of the ponytail. 

Tom came downstair just at the right time. I already sat the table, and was getting the food out of the oven when he came up behind me, and sneaked his arms around my waist, kissing the side of my neck lovingly. 

“You made casseroles” I could tell by his voice that he was smiling “It smells delicious” he sniffed into my hair “You smell delicious too” he playfully bit on my shoulder and squeezed my waist.

“Someone’s in a better mood” I sing sang and put the tray down on the table. 

“Yeah” he nodded and sat down “Thank you. I really need that to see the whole thing in a different view. Sometimes I tend to let my bad mood to take over my mind and I act unrealistically”

I placed my hand on his and gave him a reassuring smile. During dinner, he told me about how his day was, apart from the bad part. Tom told me how happy he was when Oliver Phelps texted him and asked if he wanted to be on their podcast the next week, and how they already made plans about a golf marathon as soon as it was possible for him to take off a few days from shooting. He even mentioned a few days trip to somewhere nice, just him, Willow and I, because we both had been very busy with our own jobs. He felt like we couldn’t spend enough quality time together, and we really needed it. I just looked at him, and adored the man sitting in front of me. At our dinner table, in our home. All these years together, and it still amazed me, that he chose me to be by his side for the rest of his life. He was honestly the most beautiful man I had ever met and I was more than ready to make him the happiest as possible. 

“I really can’t wait for you to put me in my place and treat me just like you did today for the rest of our lives” Tom hugged me from behind when we were getting ready to go to sleep. He played with my ring on my finger and smiled at me throughout the reflection of the mirror on my vanity table “Mrs. Y/N Felton. It still sound perfect to me.”

[ruffboijuliaburnsides]

13 + Jaskier/Yen/Geralt?

for this AU meme

13. co-stars au

OK so they're on Broadway. Doesn't matter what show - it's a musical tho. Probably some show that doesn't exist, but MAYBE RENT? (don't judge me it was formative to my queer awakening okay?)

Yeah let's just say RENT

Yen's best known for her work on the West End but she's friends with the director (I'm gonna say Fringilla) so she agreed to come do this revival or w/e on Broadway. Musical fandom assumed she was going to be playing Maureen, but she actually snagged Mimi and once that fact gets out everyone is like "I mean she's amazing, but iunno..." But she is unbearably hot in the Out Tonight sequence and basically just kills it (no pun intended). Once the boots start getting around, everybody's like "ok we take it back, perfect casting".

Jaskier is not particularly well-known outside of like. DEEP musical fandom, but his fanbase is rabid. He has a band and has mostly been in workshop productions in California and Chicago, and has been deeply frustrated to not get to follow the shows that succeed to NYC. It's not that he's not good it's that the right show hasn't found him yet. He gets cast as Mark and plays that boy SO queer. He basically declared at the first rehearsal that he wanted to play Mark like he was properly bisexual and Fringilla's like "Fuck yes we will make a show that is so goddamn queer--"

Geralt is a hollywood actor. No one's aware he can even sing, but he actually has a really glorious voice. Fringilla got him for name recognition to try to get extra butts in seats, but especially after seeing him interact with Jaskier and Yen she is just like "oh my god the sexual tension is palpable, their chemistry is perfect, this show is going to be AMAZING". He's got broody down like a MOFO but manages to bring real depth and nuance to Roger's temper and broodiness rather than just I AM SAD AND VOLATILE BECAUSE AIDS AND DEAD GIRLFRIEND.

All of them have personal rules about dating within cast and crew for an ongoing production (Yen: absolutely not, Geralt: maybe but definitely not anyone I work closely with, Jaskier: only with stage crew or orchestra not anyone I have to be on stage with) and so when they all develop crushes on each other throughout rehearsals and previews, it amps the sexual tension up to 11 between their characters. Which gives a fucking FANTASTIC air of unresolved longing between Mark and Roger that drives the shippers WILD, while a scattering of Mark/Mimi shippers have zeroed in on every tiny moment they share, usually in the back of a scene when the focus is on other people.

Isn't it great to be acting? HAHAHA THIS IS TOTALLY JUST ACTING.

Geralt and Yen end up fucking a couple of times before their run ends. Jaskier manages to make it through by sleeping with the stage director and every single member of the band, just to distract himself. Once Geralt's limited run is over, he and Yen start dating, but they end up discussing how they both are super into Jaskier, and on the day of Yen's last performance she snogs him onstage at some point towards the end of LVB. She'd warned the band and the rest of the cast, so there was what SEEMED like a scripted pause when she did it and Jaskier was dazed for like a full 3 seconds before continuing on.

The fandom went INSANE. Especially when someone caught him and Geralt snogging in the alley behind the theater after the show.

[hamiltonimagines]

Best Partner I Could Ask For

Pairing: Daveed x Reader

Request: “something sweet with Daveed. Like we're in a movie together?” - @hj-creates

Word Count: 1.7k

“So how’re you feeling? You nervous” Daveed asked me.

Daveed and I were about to be on the Ellen DeGeneres show to promote a new movie that we both starred in.

Over the course of filming, Daveed and I become really close. He was a really good friend, and that was important when you were working long days together.

“Yeah, I’m good. Just a little nervous. This is my first time on a talk show” I told him. “You are going to kill it and I’ll be right there with you” he said, giving my hand a reassuring squeeze.

Then, I heard Ellen announce “Please welcome Y/N and Daveed”. The audience started to cheer and applaud. Daveed gave me a smile, before we walked out.

We walked around the corner and waved at the audience as we walked to the couch. We got to the couch and Daveed motioned for me to go in front of him.

I walked in front of him and gave Ellen a hug. Then I stepped back and she gave Daveed a hug. Then, we all sat down.

“Hi Y/N, Daveed, how are you guys?” She asked. “We’re doing good, thank you for having us” Daveed said, knowing I was a little nervous. “Yes of course. So, you both are in a new movie called See You at Lucy’s. What is it about?” Ellen asked.

“Well I play a woman named Lucy who owns her own diner. She lives in a small town and she meets this rich business man, who happens to be passing through the town. His name is Eric, and he is played by the wonderful Daveed Diggs. And they both meet and they fall in love” I explained. “Oh that’s really sweet. So what was it like working together on this movie?” Ellen asked.

“Y/N was an absolute wonder to work with. If you haven’t seen any of her work, you need to go watch it right now. She is seriously one of the most talented actresses I know” Daveed complimented. The audience awed and I looked over at Daveed and smiled at him.

“He’s being too kind, not only is Daveed such a good actor. He’s just a really good person, we worked really early mornings and late nights on this movie. There is no one I would rather have around. Anytime that I was getting tired or frustrated, he was always there to make me laugh. He was seriously the best partner I could ask for” I elaborated. Daveed put his arm around my shoulders and pulled me in for a short side hug.

“Alright, so now on to the more juicy questions. The people want to know, are you dating?” Ellen asked. I froze up, I wasn’t prepared for this kind of question. I totally had a crush on Daveed, I could feel my cheeks heat up. I hoped Ellen wouldn’t notice my panicked expression though.

“What people Ellen?” Daveed asked, skillfully dodging the question. “Everybody, now stop avoiding the question” she replied and the whole audience cheered.

“We are not dating” Daveed answered, simply. It was the truth. “What about you Y/N? Do you agree?” She asked me, hoping that I would slip up.

“No, Daveed’s right. We are definitely not dating. Why do you all want us to be dating?” I asked the audience, giggling to myself. “Well maybe because of this photoshoot” Ellen said, and then a photo came up on the screen. We both turned around to look at it and we both froze in our seats.

A few months ago, Daveed and I had to do this photoshoot as promo for the movie. One of the scenes in the movie, was us hanging out at Daveed’s characters pool. So we had to take some photos in the pool, that they were going to use for some of the movie posters.

We had just taken a bunch of funny and goofy photos. We had one where I was sitting on Daveed’s shoulders in the pool. There a few of us both jumping into the pool. “Alright, we need a romantic one now” our director had told us.

“What do you want us to do?” I asked our director. “How about you both hold each other and pretend like you’re leaning in to kiss?” Our director suggested. We both gave the director a thumbs up.

“Alright come here love” Daveed jokingly said, opening his arms to me. He wrapped his arms around my waist, while we were standing in the pool. I placed by hands on his shoulders. We both leaned in slightly.

It wasn’t hard to pretend like I was in love with him, I had had a crush on Daveed since we met at the auditions.

“This looks awkward, how about you actually kiss and we’ll take the photos as you’re leaning in. It’ll look more realistic” our director told us. We both nodded and I took a deep breath. “It’s okay, it’s just me” Daveed said, making me giggle.

We both leaned in and slowly connected our lips. We hadn’t done any of our kiss scenes for the movie, so this was our first kiss. It felt magical, I tried to ignore the fact that there was a whole camera crew watching.

Daveed cupped my face and kissed me. I could feel him smile as we kissed.

Then we pulled away and we both had cheesy grins on our faces. I was about to say something to him, when our director yelled out “Okay, we got the shot. You guys can go dry off”.

I was majorly disappointed, I was hoping to get to kiss him again. I figured we would talk about it, but we never did.

Now, looking at the photo that Ellen had, clearly our director had decided to take a photo while we were kissing, as opposed to as we leaned in.

“Care to explain?” Ellen asked us. “That was a shot for the movie posters” Daveed said, trying to act nonchalant. “Really? You seem to be enjoying yourself, you have a big ole smile on your face in this picture” Ellen said, smirking.

“It’s because we’re professional actors” I lied and the audience started laughing. “Keep telling yourselves that. So what was each of your favorite moments from shooting this movie?” Ellen asked us. I was so glad that she changed the subject.

“My favorite was definitely Y/N’s birthday. She didn’t want anyone to know that it was her birthday, but we all found out anyway. And we all decided to prank her. So I was acting out a scene with her and I went completely off of the script. She was so confused and we had our director in on the prank. Y/N was trying to go along with it, and it was hilarious” Daveed said, chuckling to himself.

“That was so embarrassing. My favorite wasn't from the actual shooting of the movie. But Daveed and I started this tradition where every Friday night, after filming, we’d go to Daveed’s trailer and watch a movie” I said. “Oh yeah, watch a movie” Ellen said, doing air quotes when she said “watch a movie”.

The audience started to laugh again. “No” I said, embarrassed. “To be fair, we did actually watch movies” Daveed clarified. “I don’t believe you. Look at her face, she can’t even keep a straight face” Ellen said.

I felt so embarrassed. I buried my face in Daveed’s chest and he put his arm around my shoulders. I could feel his body shake as he laughed. “She’s got something to hide” Ellen said.

“No I don’t, I swear” I said, pleading with the audience to believe me. “We’ll see if the people believe you. Thank you guys for being on the show today. We’ll be right back with our next guest” Ellen said, doing an intro to the commercial break. The crew started to fix everything so it was ready for the next guest.

Daveed and I both stood up and gave Ellen hugs again. “You guys can tell me, are you guys actually dating?” She asked, now that our microphones weren’t on. “No, we’re not. Sorry to disappoint” Daveed said, laughing. “Well thanks for coming, I’ll see you guys soon” Ellen told us. We both said goodbye and walked backstage.

We got back to our dressing room and sat down on the couch. “Hey can we talk about something?” I asked Daveed, nervously. “Yeah of course, what’s wrong? You seem nervous” he said, placing a hand on my thigh to calm me down. “The kiss” I said, simply.

“Are you worried about the picture? I know we thought it was supposed to just be us leaning in, but I think it works good for the poster” he explained. “No, I mean I agree. It’s just...that’s not what I wanted to talk about” I said. “Well what do you want to talk about?” He asked me.

“We kissed” I said, not knowing how to put it into words. “Yes we did, I remember” he said, chuckling. “We never talked about it” I said, uncomfortably. “Well we’re talking about it now, so what do you want to discuss?” He asked.

Daveed was such a good guy and he always knew how to make me feel comfortable.

“Daveed, I like you. I don’t how else to tell you. But we kissed and I was about to tell you, that day in the pool and then the director said we were done. And we never even got to talk about it. I thought the kiss was pretty special, but I feel like you didn’t have that same reaction. And once we’re done with promo, I still want to hang out. I don’t want to just never talk again, after this movie is out. You’re an amazing person and I don’t want to lose you” I told him.

“It was special” Daveed said, sincerely. He cupped my face and leaned it and connected our lips. It was slow and sweet. He tasted like spearmint. We pulled away and Daveed interlaced our fingers. “I promise that you will never lose me” he said, sweetly.

“Wait, so you like me too?” I asked, still in shock. “I thought the kiss gave that away, but yes Y/N, I am head over heels for you” he said, smiling.

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