#phoenix!Merlin

[merlintintintin]

wright ANYTHING agency? 🤔

[ic3dior]

is there a completely unrealistic au where the flyboys filmed parts of topgun and the daggers find the tapes and watch them because I would eat that up

[starrstruck-xx]

not sure if everyone has seen this

[atmospheral]

marineford behind-the-scenes 3/? - warlords edition + bonus shanks 🎬 part 1 // part 2

[buttercreampuff]

Uhhh... I was sick and I had access to the incorrect quote generator soo....

Hangman: Wait, if baby oil dissolves condoms, what does it do to babies?

Bob: Believe it or not, babies and condoms are made of different materials.

Phoenix: It’s like rock paper scissors. Baby oil defeats condom, baby defeats baby oil, condom defeats baby.

Rooster: Rock also defeats baby.

Rooster: Phoenix, I screwed up, big time.

Phoenix: Rooster, given your daily life experiences, you’re gonna have to be more specific.

Phoenix: Smart is attractive. Educate me on something I don't know!

Bob: The mouth of a jellyfish is also an anus.

Phoenix: Stop.

Hangman: What are you talking about Bob? You love it here!

Bob: I'm not sure I do, I think I've just developed Stockholm syndrome.

Bob: Ha! Don't you know the trappers trap can trap the trapper?

Bob: I must be losing it, I'm quoting Hangman.

Hangman: Why are you like this??

Rooster: I used too much "No More Tears" shampoo as a kid and I haven't felt a single emotion since.

Hangman: How stupid do you think I am?!

Bob: You really want an honest answer to that?

Rooster: I hate to disagree with you, but-

Phoenix: Please, you love to disagree with me. Its your favorite thing to do.

Rooster: I’m so jetlagged I can’t even regrender my chorf.

*Everyone stares at Rooster*

Rooster: I don’t even know what I was trying to say.

Hangman, at Starbucks: Can I get a venti vanilla latte with um, seven espresso shots.

Bob, in line behind them: Jesus Christ, just do cocaine.

Maverick: Everybody shut up, I'm thinking.

Iceman, patting them on the back: Well, don’t think too hard. I wouldn’t want you to hurt yourself.

Hangman: Talk dirty to me, baby~

Rooster: The dishes.

Hangman: Wh-

Rooster: They’ve been there for 4 days and it’s your turn to wash them. You still haven’t cleaned them and I have asked you to do so several times.

Rooster: How would you like your pancakes?

Phoenix: Plain.

Maverick: With sprinkles!

Iceman: Chocolate chips.

Hangman: Potatoes.

*Phoenix, Maverick, and Iceman look at Hangman*

Hangman: What? They're good.

Maverick, dramatically: They called me a fool.

Iceman, sick of Maverick's shit: They weren’t wrong.

Maverick: And I’d love to be sorry for that, but we all know I’ve done much, much worse.

Maverick: In alcohol’s defense, I’ve done some pretty dumb shit while completely sober too.

Rooster: I don’t want to talk about it.

Iceman: Good, I don’t wanna hear about it.

Maverick: What are your adjectives?

Iceman: …You mean my pronouns?

Maverick: No, I know what your pronouns are! What are your adjectives?

Iceman: …I dunno. What are yours?

Maverick: Noisy and chaotic!

Iceman: I’ve never had something go from making no sense to making complete sense so quickly.

Goose, answering the phone: Hello?

Maverick: It’s Maverick.

Goose: What did they do this time?

Maverick: No, it’s me, Maverick. It’s actually me.

Goose: What did you do this time?

Rooster: I don’t want to talk about it.

Iceman: Good, I don’t wanna hear about it.

Goose: What do you have?

Maverick: A KNIFE!

Goose: NO!

Iceman: I'm a nice person, but I'm about to start throwing rocks at people.

Maverick: And if you have any suggestions, please put them in the suggestion box.

Coyote : That’s a trash can.

Phoenix, writing in their diary with a glitter gel pen: I'm losing my sense of humanity. Nothing matters. God is dead. There's blood on my hands.

Phoenix: Do you ever want to talk about your emotions, Rooster?

Rooster: No.

Bob: I do!

Phoenix: I know, Bob.

Bob: I’m sad.

Phoenix: I know, Bob. <br>

*In a group chat*

Bob: A pegan just flew into my window.

Maverick: Pegan?

Phoenix: A what?

Halo: Ah yes, my favourite bird, Pegan.

Fanboy: I thought you said penguin for a second, LMAO!

Halo: Just a normal day with flying penguins crashing into my window.

Fanboy: You have pigeons flying into your window? Can't relate, I have penguins flying into my window.

Bob: I literally just made a typo-

Rooster: Can you PLEASE peer pressure me into doing my project?

Coyote : Do it or you're straight.

Rooster: I said peer pressure, NOT THREATEN!

Payback: Rooster, I need some advice.

Rooster: You need advice from ME?

Payback: Yeah, frightening, isn't it?

Bob: Due to personal reasons, I will be fucking sinking to the bottom of the ocean in a large metal box.

Payback: Did Phoenix say 'I love you' and you said 'Thanks'?

Bob: THE REASONS ARE PERSONAL–

Rooster: If we don’t get out of this alive… If we’re both about to die… I love you, Hangman!

*Neither of them die*

Hangman: …

Rooster: …

Hangman: So do you wanna talk about somethi-

Rooster: No thank you.

Payback (brainstorming ideas for pranking Halo): How much could a serial killer mask possibly cost?

Maverick: Well it’s hard to find a high-quality one made out of leather or silicone, but if you did find a good one like that it’d be a couple thousands of dollars. I can try to hook you up with one but I don’t know if I’d be very successful.

Payback: Huh, that’s pretty interesting actually- Wait, how the hell do you know that?

Maverick: …I am very passionate about Halloween, Payback.

Maverick: I got an idea!

Iceman: Does it involve breaking the law?

Maverick: By now don’t you think that’s a given?

Iceman: I was just trying to be optimistic.

Maverick: Don’t bother.

Goose: Your problem is that you’ve got no common sense.

Maverick: I’ve got plenty of common sense!

Maverick: I just choose to ignore it.

Iceman: Your lover doesn't have the mental strength to caramelize onions.

Slider: Your lover thinks it takes 5-10 minutes to caramelize onions.

Maverick: Who's fucking caramelizing onions? Have you sociopaths forgotten that apples exist?

Goose: Do you think caramelizing onions is putting caramel on onions.

Maverick: Is it just me or is instant ramen even better uncooked?

Slider: It’s just you.

Maverick: When I get murdered, can you make sure I become an unsolved case?

Iceman: wHat?

Maverick: I want to be on Buzzfeed Unsolved.

Iceman: Can we go back to the part when you said "when I get murdered"?

Goose: So, everyone, what does a story NEED?

Slider: A character!

Iceman: A setting!

Maverick, a gleam in their eyes, in a near-whisper: REVENGE.

Goose: Good morning!

Slider: Bold statement.

Goose: We'll talk about this later.

Maverick: Fine, I won’t be listening.

Goose: I think Slider is in trouble.

Maverick: Alright. Struggling to give a fuck, if I’m honest.

Store Worker: Would a “Slider” please come to the front desk?

Slider, arriving at the desk: Hello, is there a problem?

Store Worker, pointing to Ice and Mav: I believe they belong to you?

Ice and Mav, simultaneously: We got lost.

Slider: I didn’t even bring you guys here with me—

Mav: When do I get my own gun?

Slider: I wouldn’t trust you with my kid’s lightsaber.

Mav: Do I sound smart, or am I smart?

Slider: You sound unbearable, to be perfectly honest.

Mav: Wow, it sure smells like wrong dog in here!

Merlin: Oh buddy...

Mav, already sobbing: ASK.

Mav: What's your greatest fear?

Goose: Being forgotten.

Mav: ...

Mav: Damn, that's deep.

Mav: Mine is the Kool Aid man, but I feel kinda stupid about it now...

Merlin: Sometimes, I don’t realize an event was traumatic until I tell it as a funny story and notice everyone is staring at me weird.

Maverick: Everyone, calm down! We're grown-ups, let's deal with this like adults!

Halo: So, we're just going to wing it and hope for the best?

Maverick: Obviously. Now, Rooster, pass the shovel.

Maverick: Rooster, you’re in charge!

Phoenix: Rooster, can we start a fire?

Bob: Hangman, we tried things your way.

Hangman: No, we didn't.

Bob: I did it in my head and it didn't work.

Rooster, proudly: I slept.

Bob: Is that so much of a rare thing that you have to say it?

Maverick to Rooster: Turn that frown upside-down!

*a little while later*

Maverick: What are you doing?

Rooster, trying to do a handstand: You told me to “turn that frown upside-down” but it’s not working .

Maverick, to the squad: And remember, if I get harsh with you it is only because you’re doing it all wrong.

Phoenix: Why are you looking at me through a fork?

Rooster: I'm pretending you're in jail.

Phoenix: Why?

Rooster: It's spiritually healing.

Maverick, in a room with Halo, Coyote, and Payback: It’s calm in here.

Maverick: It scares me…

*before goose dies btw*

Iceman: What would Goose think?

Maverick: Ok, that’s an interesting thought, but hear me out: what if… we ran an experiment where we spent the rest of our lives finding out what happened if we never told them?

*Maverick and Iceman are texting*

Maverick: Who are you? Someone changed the names in my phone.

Iceman: What did they change my name to?

Maverick: Chosen One.

Iceman: Don’t change it back.

Maverick: BUT WHO ARE YOU?!?!

Iceman: I’m the chosen one.

[longlivechips]

Arthur in The Eye of the Phoenix: This is my quest to do alone. Get that Merlin ALONE

Merlin: lol our quest you mean also is it ok if I bring my boyfriend?

[cynthia39100]

Merlin rewatch -- S3E8: The Eye of the Phoenix

Arthur's pretty chill in this episode I feel.

There’s the scene at the bridge:

The first thing he did when he spotted Grettir was putting away his sword, and he remained respectful throughout the conversation. In contrast Gwaine raised his sword instantly.

(tbf, it could be that Gwaine was with Merlin so he was in protection mode, while Arthur was roaming around alone with a fantastical questy mindset).

Such a dork <3. Just took words in their literal meanings lol.

It's just a comical beat, but it also showed how not tense and not on guard Arthur was, facing this mysterious figure who was guarding the supposedly magical land.

He even got this nice, gentle smile when Grettir came to shake hands!

When Grettir mentioned magic, while Arthur rejected the idea, he didn't jump up and down at the word, only calmly expressed his disagreement. "I don't condone the use of magic.” Then Grettir talked about different realm, different rule, and Arthur seemed to really take in those words. He still wouldn't seek help from magic, I don’t think, bit the information was at the back of his mind for him to utilise should the need arise.

He even thanked Grettir like a good boy he was~

When Grettir disappeared into thin air -- a blatant occurrence of magic, Arthur just looked and shrugged and kept going 😂It seemed like Arthur just accepted it as a thing in this place that he was going in and it wasn't his business. I really like his kind of taking things in stride without thinking too much or making a fuss. Maybe it’s for the benefit of the quest, or that’s just how he was when left alone/free of princely duty.

In other scenes too:

Arthur did caution Gwaine but it wasn't at all harsh, just a gentle nudge. He didn’t shout “He’s the King!” like some previous instances, just that it’s his father and yes he knew his father was wrong but he’d appreciate if the insult happens away from his earshot.

When Merlin was hiccuping non-stop and seemingly not understanding the meaning of "alone and unaided", while Arthur was preparing a serious possibly-deadly quest, Arthur was quite patient too. He was annoyed but he did explain to Merlin with proper words instead of throwing things or yelling. An accomplishment eh lol.

The only time he was not chill was when Merlin got to him in the Perilous Land, but it's Merlin, and his most important quest as a prince was interrupted (sort of disqualified too), I think he's allowed to be a bit of a prat xd

[S3E8] [other episodes]

[inalandofsadclowns]

They're gossiping about Arthur like a man's respective bff and his significant other, except not in the casting that the show intended.

Look at Gwen's expressions -- that is some solid best friend energy. She can't wait to make fun of Arthur to his face. She tried to ridicule him with Merlin first, but boyfriends do take each other too seriously sometimes.

And Merlin... Well, Merlin is going to annoy Arthur about it later, but before that, he needs an outlet to express his eternal worry and admiration about Arthur, lest he wants him to find out about the feelings. Can't let that happen.

Still, gotta defend hubbie's honor.

... Nevermind.

[roguefankc]

It's Flu Season! And because Maverick would be the biggest baby if he got sick...

(Penny, Wolfman, Slider, Merlin, and Hollywood run though the front door of Iceman and Maverick house, with Iceman tiredly sitting on the couch in the living room)

Wolfman: Ice?! what's wrong?! We all got your message that you needed help!

Iceman: It's awful! The whole house is sick! First Hangman came down with the flu, then Phoenix, then Rooster, then Payback, and then all the rest of the Dagger Squad! I was running a sick ward all weekend!

Merlin:...wait, why isn't Maverick helping you?

Iceman (flatly): Because then came Monday...

(Maverick comes out in his bathrobe, hair tousled, pale, clammy, and half-asleep and in his hands a bottle of pills)

Maverick (whining): Ice, honey? Can you open the aspirin for me?

---

(The whole 80s Top Gun team and Penny stay to help Iceman run the house and take care of Maverick and the Dagger Squad)

(Maverick is in bed, weakly ringing a bell)

Maverick (ringing the bell): Slider...

Slider (in the next room helping Coyote): Give me a minute.

Maverick (ringing the bell): Slider...

Slider (in the next room): I said I'm coming!

Maverick (ringing the bell): Slider...

(Slider rushes into Maverick's bedroom in a panic): What?! What?! What?!

Maverick (weakly): My pillow needs poofing.

Slider (eye twitching):...Mitchell, I don't think you want to put a pillow in my hands right now.

---

(Maverick is in bed, whining and gasping for breath)

Maverick (weakly): I'm dying, Hollywood. I'm giving up the ghost. Every cell in my being is crying out in anguish. It was a good life while it lasted, but this is it. Hello, Grim Reaper.

Hollywood (with a bottle of cough syrup and a spoon in his hands): Cut the bullshit. The medicine doesn't taste that bad.

Maverick (weakly):...Goose? Dad? Carol? Is that you?

---

(Maverick is in his bathrobe, still sick, and in Iceman's home office while Iceman is frantically typing away on his keyboard)

Maverick: Ice, sweetie? Can you heat up some chicken soup for me?

Iceman (stressed): Mav, sorry but I'm really busy right now! I need to approve this contract in twenty minutes! Can't you just fend for yourself?

Maverick (whining): But I'm sick, honey...

Iceman: Mav, for fuck's sake, we're not talking brain surgery! All you have to do is open a stupid can and dump it in a pot!

(Maverick disappears into the kitchen and then come back a minute later. In his hands is a pot, and in the pot is a can of chicken soup. The can is open but the contents of the soup are still inside the can)

Maverick: Now what?

Iceman:...now, we talk brain surgery.

---

(Maverick stumbles in the kitchen where Penny, Wolfman, and Merlin are making soup and orange juice for all the Dagger Squad)

Maverick: Is it time for my aspirin yet?

Wolfman: No, Mitchell.

Maverick: But my throat hurts...

Merlin: Maverick, go back to bed. It hasn't been four hours yet.

Maverick: But my head hurts! My joints hurt! My eyes hurt! My body hurts! (in a baby voice) My itty bitty widdle pinkies hurt!

(Penny sighs and opens the aspirin bottle)

Maverick (smirks): I knew I'd win with that one.

Penny: These aren't for you.

(Penny gives two pills to herself, Merlin, and Wolfman and they all gulp them down immediately)

---

(BONUS)

(Cyclone is back at headquarters in his office, feet on his desk with a small glass of bourbon)

Cyclone (smiling): What a peaceful, quiet day.

[miles-wrightworth]

okayokayokay

please tell me someone here knows the show Merlin and also knows Ace Attorney.

the au crossover is actually perfect

Arthur - Miles Merlin - Phoenix Morgana - Franziska Gwen - Maya Uther - Manfred Gaius - Mia

like oh my god it works so well and i ship merthur so nrmt and franmaya up in here

[none-ofthisnonsense]

Rewatching The Eye of the Phoenix:

Gwen and Merlin are besties and I love that.

Gaius!!

Merlin. Merlin no

[merthurglompfest]

Title: A Warlock's Tears By: Funkie_Moon Gift for: Phoenix Reborn (Artemystic) Rating: General Medium: Digital Art Warning(s): No Archive Warnings Apply Summary: Fill for Merthur Glompfest 2025   AO3 Link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/63792505/chapters/163571110

[neverleaveyourwingman]

I did a thing ✌🏻

[spectre79]

[dont-let-me-eat-pears]

arthur's adamance about undertaking his quest to the perilous lands Alone when he's never had a problem bringing merlin along literally everywhere else before

[longlivechips]

One thing I always find funny about BBC Merlin is that while Merlin loves Arthur, him being there makes anything 20x harder for Merlin.

By himself Merlin just does a little ✨ and his enemies are dead

When Arthur is there Merlin has to wait for him to get knocked out before just fixing the problem instantly