#platonic intimacy

[antikosm]

Aro/Ace Terms Masterlist

Please let me know if I forgot anything

NOTE: There is a distinct difference between someone's personal orientation versus how they feel about sexuality/romanticism as a whole. Someone who's sex/romance repulsed may be in favour of open sexual/romantic expression or even vice versa (shoutout to @sowearecleariamhere for informing me of this!)

Types of attraction

Sexual - I wanna have sex with that

Romantic - I want to date that

Sensual - I want to hug that

Platonic - I want to be friends with that

Platonic crushes do exist. They are called “squishes”. You go through the same process of having a romantic or sexual crush but instead of landing them in bed, you’re on the floor at 2am with pizza rolls, Shrek in the background, talking about eldritch monstrosities (or whatever your shared interest is)

Aesthetic - that looks so heckin’ cool/pretty I love it

Intellectual - the desire to engage with another in an intellectual manner, i.e. having a conversation, picking their brain, and finding out how they think

Terms describing degree of attraction

Aromantic - lack of romantic attraction

Asexual - lack of sexual attraction

Aplatonic - lack of platonic attraction

Aroace - lack of both sexual and romantic attraction

Demi - attraction only forms once a strong emotional bond has been formed

Grey/gray - rarely/seldom experiences attraction

Allosexual - someone who experiences sexual attraction

I think I’ve also heard/seen it referred to as ‘arosexual’ but that’s honestly a bit confusing

Alloromantic - someone who experiences romantic attraction

I personally shorten both of those to “allo” (pronounced ‘aloe’)

Apothiosexual - sex-repulsed

Apothioromantic - romance-repulsed

Apothiaroace - often shortened to just ‘apothi’. In addition to being aroace, apothis are repulsed by romantic/sexual scenes, items, displays, etc. to varying degrees

Sex-neutral and sex-positive/favourable aces exist as well

Not all of us have the same level of comfort with sexual and romantic activities so please check. I mean that applies to everyone anyway, but please check and don’t assume that just because someone is aro/ace, that doesn’t mean they are sex/romance repulsed

Queerplatonic - Queerplatonic typically refers to a relationship that bends the lines between a romantic relationship and a non-romantic relationship. A queerplatonic relationship (QPR) often goes beyond what is socially acceptable for a platonic relationship but does not fit the typical notion of a romantic relationship.

Alterous attraction - a type of emotional attraction to someone that isn’t entirely romantic or platonic.

Chastity - actively refraining from sexual activities. This is NOT part of the ace/aro spectrum, though it is a common assumption when someone says they are ace/aro. Thankfully we’re getting a bit more representation in media now so it’s not as common of an assumption as it used to be, but it’s still there, especially in those communities.

An absolute FANTASTIC addition by @heyftinally in case anyone doesn't see the repost

Gonna expand on sex favorable/neutral/repulsed, since this is a masterlist after all: - Sex favorable - regardless of your sexual orientation, you personally want to engage in sexual activity with someone (significant other, one night stand, friends with benefits, etc) - Sex neutral - if you're with someone who wants to engage in sexual activities then you may or may not, depending on a variety of factors, but you have no strong inclinations for or against engaging in sex itself as an activity. Basically it's "alright" Sex repulsed/averse - the idea of personally engaging in sexual activities makes you want to hurl/cry/claw your skin off/spontaneously combust. If someone suggested doing sexual activities together, you would probably vehemently say "No!" before they even finished the question. You would rather do anything else - Sex positive - refers to your attitudes about sex in general. Regardless of where you fall in the above three terms, you recognize that other people want to, and should have the freedom and right to, engage in consensual sexual activities, even if you personally don't like or want those activities. Essentially shorthand for "I respect the right of other adults to have gay sex, have gender-weird sex, have sex with multiple people in and out of monogamous relationships/marriages, and have weird, wild, freaky kinky sex, so long as all participants and consenting adults". You can still personally want zero sex for yourself or think a particular kink is weird/ick, but you can, in tumblr speak, be normal about consenting adults doing consenting adult stuff - Sex negative - conservative purity culture, basically. You think nobody should have sex ever, or at least not until marriage, and when they do it should only be the "right" or "good" kind, as arbitrarily decided by you/society/some collective. You think badly of, look down on, and may even treat badly anyone who doesn't have the "right" kind of sex in your opinion. You are not normal about consenting adults doing consenting adult activities (even though they don't involve you in any way)

A wonderful addition from @overlord-of-chaos Sex aversion is not the same thing as sex repulsed.

If you are sex adverse, you personally have no desire to partake in any of those actions but seeing or knowing other people partake in that doesn't bother you.

Sex repulsion is when you can't stand doing it yourself, seeing/hearing about/knowing that others partake in it, or even just the idea of it.

Microlabels/Terms describing flavour of attraction

Note: -sexual is used for many of these so we don't have to deal with duplicates confusing things. All of these prefixes can be used with -romantic, -sexual, -platonic, and I imagine -alterous as well

Abrosexual - orientation fluctuates between a variety of orientations

Aceflux - similar to abrosexual, but orientation is contained to asexual spectrum

Acespike - someone who is asexual but may experience intense, brief, and random bouts of sexual attraction

Aegosexual - disconnect between oneself and the target of arousal

Amicusromantic/sexual - only experiences romantic attraction to those who they have formed a platonic relationship with (subset of demi)

Angled aroace - the same as oriented, but for those who are demi, grey, flux, etc.

Anthrosexual - someone who is attracted to humans and alterhumans regardless of gender identity/expression

Bellussexual - has interest in the aesthetic/aspects/certain sexual actions, but does not experience sexual attraction or want a sexual relationship

Caedsexual - previously allo, but now ace due to past trauma

Cupiosexual - wanting a sexual relationship but not experiencing sexual attraction

Finsexual/gynesexual - attraction to femininity

Fraysexual - opposite of demi. Attraction dissipates once an emotional connection has been formed

Linsexual - attraction to androgyny

Lithosexual - experiencing sexual attraction but not wanting it to be reciprocated

Loveless Romantic/Lovelessromantic - those who cannot feel love or feel disconnected from love but can feel romantic attraction/don't feel disconnected from the concept of romance

Minsexual/androsexual - attraction to masculinity

Orchid - the opposite of cupio; experiences ____ attraction but has no desire for a relationship of that type

Placiosexual - not wanting to be on the receiving end of sexual activities but wishing to perform them on others

Quiosexual - unable to distinguish between sexual attraction and other forms of attraction

Qui(r)oromantic - inability to distinguish between platonic and romantic attraction

Reciprosexual - not experiencing sexual attraction towards someone until you discover they experience sexual attraction towards you

Requiessexual - similar to caedsexual, but rather than trauma, ace identity originates from a state of emotional exhaustion, usually from a past sexual experience

Oriented aroace -  an aromantic asexual (aroace) individual who experiences a form of tertiary attraction, that they feel is significant enough to warrant a place alongside their aroace orientation. (i.e. gay aroace, bi aroace)

Angled aroace - someone who is on the aroace spectrum (grey, demi, fray, etc) who experiences a type of attraction significant enough to stand alongside their aroace orientation

Examples of mixed orientations

Heteroromantic asexual biplatonic

Poly greyromantic pansexual

Apothi abroplatonic

Placiosexual aromantic finplatonic

Aroace cupioplatonic

Pan lithioromantic

Fraysexual biromantic aplatonic

You can get WAY more specific than what these cover, but just to give a general idea

Amatonormativity

Amatonormativity is the assumption that all human beings pursue love or romance, especially by means of a monogamous long-term relationship. The term was coined by Elizabeth Brake, in her book Minimizing Marriage: Marriage, Morality, and the Law (2011).

[demonscantgothere]

Platonic soulmates, platonic co-parenting, platonic big spoons and little spoons snuggling under the same blanket. Platonic intimacy is so important.

[rummels]

weight on my shoulders

relationships: platonic Reader & Chan & Changbin word count: ~2300 warnings: none tags: fluff, platonic intimacy, gender neutral reader summary: You're in a weird and uncomfortable headspace, your friends and flatmates Chan and Changbin help you with lots of soft affection and understanding.

read on ao3

You quietly plod into the living room, your feet hidden in thick fluffy socks causing you to sneak up to the couch unnoticed. Your frame is completely concealed by an oversized hoodie that reaches down to the middle of your thighs, tickling the back of your bare legs a bit when you stop a short distance away. You’re not sure if you like the feeling, it feels a bit like tiny zips of static prickle against your skin where the fabric brushes against you just the tiniest bit. It causes you to frown, huffing a tiny breath out of your nose. Everything feels a bit…off. The figure sitting on the couch hadn’t noticed you until now, engrossed in some TV show or movie, but the quiet noise makes the man look over to you.

“Hey,” Chan says softly, a warm smile tugging on his lips.

“I didn’t even notice you coming in. You wanna join me?”

He pats the space next to him in invitation, raising his eyebrows slightly in question and rearranging his position a bit so his legs are not stretched out across the couch. You tilt your head in a curious gesture and nod slightly, shuffling over and plomping yourself into the newly vacated spot, immediately leaning into Chan’s side. It’s not uncommon for you to seek out physical contact with your best friend and flatmate, the both of you sharing and enjoying skinship in a very loving yet platonic way.

It’s quiet for several minutes, Chan again taken in by whatever is shown on TV. You couldn’t care less, your brain going both zero and a thousand miles per minute, leaving you feeling a little overwhelmed and disoriented, not really knowing what to do with yourself while thoughts zip around in your head without you really being able to grab onto a single one of them. Chan’s hand unconsciously wanders across the back of the couch to you, his fingertips starting to slowly comb through the hair at your neck. You let out a low hum and close your eyes. This is nice. Somehow grounding. Just the tiniest bit, you push your head against the touch to encourage it and let Chan know to not stop his ministrations. He looks over to you again.

“Are you okay?” He looks a bit concerned. Usually you’re much more talkative, especially after a long day at work, wanting to share whatever annoyed or excited you that day or simply let out your annoyance about some frustrating project or other. Your brain rambles at you from the moment you wake up and simply letting your thoughts out and sharing them is often very relaxing to you, especially when you don’t have to be worried about being written off as an annoying chatterbox. Which you never have to worry about with Chan. Never had to, actually. So your continued silence is definitely raising some worries in your attentive friend.

You look at him, obviously giving the answer some thought before you scrunch your nose up and nod-shake your head in a definitely a little weird display of uncertainty. Immediately, Chan tunes in on you more, his whole body angling towards you a bit more while he studies your face.

“Did something happen?”

You shake your head no.

“Are you having a bad day?”

You shake your head again.

“Hm…are you getting sick?”

Again, a definite no, you shake your head.

“So simply a bad day maybe?”

You begin to negate that too when he hastily adds “You know that would be okay too, yeah? You can have a bad day without any reason and it’s still okay and valid. Some days are just fucked.”

A small grin sneaks onto your face, knowing he is about to quote one of those silly motivational Tiktoks you both send each other sometimes. He grins back, relieved at seeing your reaction.

“And there’s no way to unfuck them. Try again tomorrow,” he says and can’t stop himself from giggling a bit before ruffling your hair affectionately. You clear your throat, it feeling a bit scratchy after actually being silent for quite some time – you hadn’t even consciously realized that until now.

“Don’t worry, I’m not feeling bad, I’m just –“ You try to find the right words, frowning a bit, “-off? I don’t know,” you trail off, hoping he might understand. You yourself are not even able to understand it but Chan is smart, he gets people. And maybe he understands. Even if not, you know you don’t have to worry, he will simply accept it and will not try to force something out of you just for the sake of his own peace of mind.

You are proven right when he softly nods his head, his eyes deep in thought until he snaps back to you and gifts you one of his blinding smiles. “Come here, babygirl,” he says while pulling you over and manhandling you into a cuddling position against his side, halfway in his lap, his hands again finding themselves in your hair again. You make a little squawking noise at the pet name but your weird aversion to speaking right now is definitely not helping your protest. Factor in that Chan knows how much you actually secretly like the term of endearment? You’ve got no ground to stand on. The voices in your head have just started to discuss if this is something to be happy or disgruntled about when you feel his fingernails scratch against your scalp and you think you could start purring like a fucking cat any second now. Fuck this. There’s no snark left in you right now to defend yourself and you actually start to feel a tiny bit more like yourself so why bother?

Chan goes back to watching his show while holding you against himself, switching between softly combing through your hair with his fingers and giving you head scritches. You feel weirdly small, which seems a bit ridiculous to you considering you’re actually exactly the same height as him and also not exactly small in any other way. But it’s so nice, you melt more and more into him, your eyes drifting shut every now and then until your weird brain swirls manage to drag you up again.

By the time the front door opens and closes again, it has turned dark outside and Chan perks up, looking over the back of the couch towards the hallway.

“YA!” A shout echoes through the apartment, announcing the arrival of Changbin as he throws his backpack somewhere into the hallway.

You flinch at the sudden noise, also moving your head a bit but Chan suddenly has a rather firm grip in your hair and keeps you in place. Eyes widening, you feel like your pulse is suddenly going down in a very relaxing way. What the hell? The effect is too nice to fight against though, so you decide to go with it and stay where you are. Maybe Chan really does know best. Your own brain definitely doesn’t feel like it’s able to deal with any responsibilities and decisions right now.

“Tone it down, Binnie.” Chan’s voice vibrates against the side of your face. Huh, when did you slide all the way over to rest your face against his chest? You instinctively try to perk up again in surprise, you’ve also started to develop a bit of crick in the upper part of your back from the position you were in. This time Chan lets you but keeps his hand at the back of your neck which you are weirdly thankful for. Changbin chooses that moment to stick his head into the room and, seeing the two of you cuddled up on the couch, wiggles his eyebrows in a suggestive manner while smirking like the little gremlin he sometimes tends to be.

“You’re trying to win them over while I’m not home? Unfair business, Christopher,” he playfully scolds Chan and again you manage to smile. Yay, an emotion!

The two of them like to put up a whole charade of pretending to heroically and dramatically trying to win your heart over, each trying to ‘win’ against the other. All three of you are very much aware of the fact that this is all a game. You love them both to bits, would probably gladly cut off your own hand for them if the situation demanded it. But you’re also all very safe in the knowledge that nothing sexual would ever come into your relationship. Between you preaching about open and honest communication, Chan’s will to provide and care and give love and Changbin’s absolute lack of any kind of shame or reservations when it comes to feelings and affection, the three of you have created a very nurturing and loving environment in your shared apartment.

Chan’s chuckle is audible next to you before he speaks. “No wooing today, I’m just trying to cuddle y/n’s brain into submission because we’re feeling a bit weird today,” he explains, his thumb rubbing small circles into the soft skin under your ear while his hand lays on your neck.

“Oh no, do we have a scrambled brain today?” Changbin sits down next to you on the couch and leans closer, peering into your face like it may just give him all the answers on its own. You nod and pull a frowny face.

“They don’t like to talk right now.” Chan lets you out of his arms as you reach over for Changbin, going to lean your forehead against his big shoulder. But he reaches down and cups your face in his hands, holding it and looking at you while obviously thinking something over.

“Can I try something?” he ends up asking. “It might help but you need to tell me if you feel uncomfortable with it today, you know I will not be mad if you do, right?”

Having no clue which brilliant idea he has cooked up underneath those fluffy curls, you nod your head in agreement. You don’t need to worry, that much you definitely know.

Changbin hurries to shoo Chan off the couch and pushes you down with sure hands until you’re fully laying down. You only manage to look up at him for a couple of seconds before he is once again pulling and pushing at you until you end up on your stomach. He also tugs at your hoodie a bit until it doesn’t form any big creases against your body anymore and then you feel a warm hand at the small of your back.

“I will lay down on top of you now, is that okay?”, he asks softly and you feel a flutter of excitement in your chest. Yes. That would be perfect actually. Suddenly the fact that he’s not already settled on top of you seems almost cruel to you and you wiggle around a bit, nodding your head in clear agreement and permission.

He can’t help but poke your butt – of course he can’t – before crawling over you and then slowly letting all of his weight push down against you. You let out a small grunt of contentment, the air getting pushed out of your lungs and you feel like your bones turn into liquid. Perfect. This is exactly what you needed. Like putting on 3D glasses in the cinema, two separate yet connected, overlayered parts of yourself seem to finally slot together and begin to form a coherent version of yourself again. Changbin moves around a tiny bit still, finding the perfect spot and position to rest in while you turn your head to the side, peering into the dimly lit living room, your eyelids fluttering a bit.

Chan moves into your field of vision and crouches down to be at eye level with you. He’s got his signature ‘proud loving parent’ smile on and usually you would tease him for it – to hide how much you absolutely love get looked at like that – but right now it’s perfect for your mushy brain. He reaches out and tugs a bit on your hood.

“Would you like to put that on?”

You feel even less like talking right now, your body and mind almost like molasses. It’s a sweet, heady feeling and you smile, blinking slowly once and hoping he understands. He cocks his head to the side and raises an amused eyebrow.

“Is that a yes?”

You give a slow long blink again, probably smiling like an idiot. He chuckles and reaches over, slipping your hood over your head and arranging it in a way that makes you peek out of it like a little ferret out of its den. The fact that they know you so well, aware that you like to have your hearing muffled sometimes, feeling safe inside your hoodie, makes you so happy that you give another slow blink while contently scrunching up your nose with a smile. Chan boops it with his finger and stands up.

“You okay down there?”, you hear Changbin checking in from somewhere on top of you and you give a tiny wiggle so as to not accidentally throw him off of you but still answer his question ….somehow.

“Perfect. Just let me know when I should get up again, please don’t just yeet me off when it gets to be too much, alright?”

You wiggle again, completely settling in now and closing your eyes. Your head is not quiet, it never is when you’re awake. But right now there’s only a soft song buzzing in the back of your mind – you probably heard it somewhere on your way home – while you think about the new movie that’s running in the cinemas and you wanted to go to with both Chan and Changbin, your mind switching over to remember the time you all went to Changbin’s problematic cousin’s birthday party last month to crash it as a fake throuple, nearly sending the whole conservative side of his family into a collapse. Also there’s this brownie recipe Felix shared with you, maybe you’re gonna try that out tomorrow…

[catsinplatoniclove]

fucking love cuddling. 10/10 activity. being in their arms feels like safety and comfort

[thatnerdyqueer]

ok so I know that the terms lovequeer, loveloose, and lovepunk all refer less to an 'orientation' as such, but a way of viewing the concept of 'love'.

For example, you could have a romantic partner, but choose to prioritise or at least equate platonic relationships with an equivalent or higher level of commitment.

With that said. I have never seen any alloromantic people using these terms! So, humour me, and vote

[whumpster-dumpster]

Caretaker helping Whumpee bathe (platonic) will always hit my soft spot

Saaaame 🥺

[ily-no-romo]

Friendship is so fucking wild bro like you just have these people you love and they love you back and then when you feel shitty you can just tell them that and if you ask for hugs someone will probably give you one and it’s ok to spend time together doing nothing or just like existing in each other’s lives while completing tasks and errands, and sometimes they’ll ask how you’re doing while hanging out and you can say you are so happy and love them so much but you can also say you feel kind of shitty cause life sucks but it’s less shitty when you’re with them and they’re fine with that because they know what you mean and understand that sometimes feeling less shitty is your equivalent of achievable happiness in the moment and holy shit I just love my friends so much I love spending time with them

[keicordelle]

Sometimes, all you need is a friend

[iamthecomet]

Hey hi I've been thinking about the ghouls (Rain most likely, and either Dew or Mountain) and sharing a shower just for platonic intimacy and taking care of each other 🥺

Here's everyone's daily dose of extra soft Dew/Rain. Because I love them.

It's become an after-show ritual. Rain refuses to shower at the venues. Citing a myriad of reasons starting with the water smells bad and ending with it makes my skin feel weird. And Dew does the same, only his reasons are more the water pressure sucks and why would I want to shower with all of you? Rain presses himself to Dew as soon as they're back on the bus. He smells like sweat and the venue, rubbery, plasticine in a way that makes Dew's nose twitch. Dew can't be much better. He can feel the film of sweat drying on his body, stiff and sticky. He can smell the cigarette and stale beer scene clinging to his jacket. Rain doesn't seem to care though, he just nuzzles closer, resting his head on Dew's boney shoulder, nuzzling his nose into Dew's hair and neck. "Clingy," Dew whispers as he tips his head to the side to rest his cheek against Rain's temple. Rain only hums in response.

Dew feels his exhaustion in his bones. The adrenaline of the show trickles from his body with every minute that passes. He's spent the last six weeks exhausted, it's nothing new. Touring is not conducive to being rested. He's surviving on too much caffeine and nicotine and a few hours of sleep in whatever lumpy hotel bed he's shoved toward. Dew wishes he was like Swiss, able to fall asleep anywhere. Even now, Swiss is curled up into the side of his seat, his head smushed up against the window, pillowed by the hood of his sweatshirt--asleep, mouth open, drool gathering in the corner. They've only been on the road for five minutes. Instead, Dew has trouble sleeping through the night in his own bed. Never mind hotel beds that are somehow always wrong. Too hard. Too soft. They all feel like they've been crafted out of rocks and feathers. He laces his fingers with Rain, pulls their joined hands onto his thigh, rubbing his calloused thumb over the space between Rain's thumb and forefinger. It's a short drive to the hotel. Dew untangles himself from Rain as soon as the bus stops moving, he shoulders his overnight bag and is the first one off of the bus. It's a sticky, humid, summer night. It makes his skin itch. He leads the way into the hotel and waits, impatiently by the elevator for Copia to get their keys. Copia has a system for how he rooms the ghouls together. Dew imagines that it's the product of some behavioral spreadsheet that Sister crafted up. It doesn't matter. It's rare that they actually follow it, hopping between rooms like musical chairs--treating their floor of the hotel the same way they do the Abbey. Doors open half of the night to the chagrin of any other unlucky hotel guests. Dew is always paired with Aether. Rain's always with Mountain. Swiss gets paired up with Cumulus. Sunshine with Cirrus. Each agent of chaos paired with someone who Sister thinks is supposed to keep them in line. It rarely works. Mountain and Dew trade keycards as soon as Copia hands them out. Rain seals himself back to Dew's side as soon as they get back in the elevator. Dew slides his hand up into the sweat-damp curls on the back of Rain's head. He scratches his nails against his scalp. "You smell," Dew says. "Better than you." Rain counters, digging his nose into the juncture between Dew's neck and shoulder and inhaling sharply. By the time they reach their floor, Dew's holding onto his human glamor with white knuckles. His skin feels too tight, his joints ache. He drops the glamor as soon as the door snicks shut behind them. Sighing bodily as the weight of it lifts off of him. Rain's already making a b-line for the shower, his own glamor fading. Tail uncoiling as he strips his jeans off. Dew follows him, pulling his shirt over his head, trying, and failing, to keep it from catching on his horns. Rain's already in the shower when Dew gets there. Steam filling the comedically small bathroom. Dew strips down the rest of the way and slips into the shower with Rain.

They're lucky they're both small. Mountain and Aether are definitely not going to fit in one of these showers together. As it is, when Dew turns to let the water spray on his back, he rubs up against Rain. Rain's already purring, back pressed against the cool tile, eyes closed as water that isn't quite hot enough for Dew rains down on them. Dew taps the knob up a few notches and Rain hisses at he temperature spike but doesn't complain. His tail curls around Dew's leg, the broad spade of it resting against the side of his knee. "Can I wash your hair?" Rain asks, hands already trailing up Dew's back. Dew nods. The hotel shampoo smells like chemicals. Whatever flowers it's meant to smell like don't actually exist in nature. Dew wrinkles his nose at it, but still groans when Rain sinks his fingers into the hair at the crown of Dew's head. Scratching, rubbing. Dew tips his head back just enough to keep soap from running into his eyes. He closes them. He feels every muscle in his body relax one by one as Rain shuffles him a little to rinse his hair. Rain works conditioner into the ends methodically. Dew doesn't let many people do this--they never get it right. But Rain has mastered the technique, and Dew is all too happy to let him. When it's Rain's turn, he has to crouch a little so Dew can reach. Digging his fingers into Rain's scalp until the water ghoul gasps and sighs and his knees go a little soft. Dew runs his fingers through Rain's curls as he rinses his hair, untangling small knots and rubbing slow circles over the base of his skull until Rain is knocking his hands away. "You're going to put me to sleep if you don't stop." "Good." "You really want to drag me to the bed?" Rain turns his head, raising a dark eyebrow at Dew. Dew shakes his head. "Who said anything about that? If you fall asleep here, you're staying here. I'm not going to complain about having the bed to myself." "Liar," Rain says, shifting them again so he can pull Dew's back flush to his front, pressing his face against Dew's hair. He kisses the side of one of his horns fondly. Dew doesn't argue. There's no point. Rain grabs the bar of soap and smoothes it over Dew's back, pressing his thumbs into Dew's constantly tense shoulder blades as he does. "You'd miss me," Rain presses. "Yeah," Dew agrees, "I would."

[gwaindrifter]

Let's try this again, because poor wording on my part cause the last poll to spiral out of control.

I'm not looking for what you find acceptable morally or your personal level; I know it's fine to have sex with your friends platonicly if that's what you're into. I'm asking what is the level that the general masses would find acceptable without raising an eyebrow.

And you know what, if I feel up to it I might even compare the results with the poll I had that got misconstrued.

[hidefdoritos]

I know the way my roommate breathes.

I do not know her favorite color,

or her favorite song,

or her favorite sibling.

I know that she adores noodles,

that a good sunset makes her giddy,

and that she loves sweaters.

She doesn't know what to do when I cry.

I can recognize the way she clears her throat from across a crowded room.

I know that she prefers soft lighting,

and asymmetry,

and Thieves' essential oil.

I don't quite know the self that she's grown into.

I know that she thinks she's a crybaby.

I do not know where she wants to live,

when she learned to play the piano,

or why she is so distant.

She spends all the time with her boyfriend now.

I know her bookshelf

and her handwriting, which looks just like her voice,

and her hairstyles (always incredible).

I do not know if he's looked at rings yet.

I know from her face whether she'll talk or not when she comes home,

from her eyes whether the day has been good or bad,

and from her brows whether she is at peace or distressed.

I know how she sniffs when she cries.

I know she is often distressed these days,

and that it's not about her boyfriend,

or her family,

or her studies.

I do not know how to help her.

But I do know that she loves soup,

and I know her favorite pens,

and I know the way she breathes.

[dwarfman403-blog]

I said:

“Thanks for being my friend”

What I actually meant was:

“Thanks for not running the other way when you saw how much of a complete wreck I am on the daily, and when you realized that my story will ultimately end in an absurdly tragic way”

[aspecbuddie]

the scenes in station 19 where the whole team lie down together, practically on top of each other, during emotional moments, are some of my all time favourite scenes in tv and I am still sobbing about the new one we got last night

[anthemiswrites]

golden

sometimes you get a glimpse of sixteen

nostalgia visits and settles in the carpet

your friends are home for the holidays

and someone's holding the torch

the air gets fuzzy and the honey whiskey burns

but you're surrounded by laughter and gold

everyone is smiling and you're back

you're home

finally home

[rummels]

안아줄게요 (Hug Me)

relationships: platonic Seungmin & Everyone (with a little more focus on Seungmin & Minho) word count: ~2300 warnings: none tags: fluff, platonic intimacy, cuddles summary: Unbeknownst to most, Seungmin turns into the biggest cuddler of all of them as soon as he falls asleep and another person is close by. Minho finds out he's been sorely missing out on Seungmin cuddles and makes sure to remedy that.

read on ao3

Everyone knows that Seungmin isn’t the biggest fan of skinship. He doesn’t dislike it per se. He just rarely initiates it or seeks out one of his friends for a hug or a cuddle like some of the others do. When Changbin grabs him to hold him in a body lock from behind while they’re on stage or at the airport, or Felix shifts over on the couch to cuddle up to his side for a while, laying his head on his shoulder, he lets them, enjoying the closeness but not minding when it is over again. That’s the way most people read him and how he wants to be seen, how he actually sees himself. It is also not incorrect. But it’s not the whole picture either.

Unbeknownst to most, Seungmin turns into the biggest cuddler of all of them as soon as he falls asleep and another person is close by. In full octopus mode, he will scoot over until he can grab onto the other inhabitant of his bed, wrapping his arms and legs around them and snuggle as close as possible. He will not let go until he starts to wake up, at which point he just flops over to be by himself again until he’s really awake.

His bandmates are aware of this and will sometimes even use this knowledge to charge up on Seungmin cuddles by purposefully rooming with him when they have to stay at a hotel with double beds again. While napping on the mattresses they sometimes get provided with backstage during concerts or shows, it happens only when Seungmin’s really stressed out and tired. The others always make sure he’s got a cuddle buddy then because it seems like it actually helps him calm down and rest better. But it is not a thing that is openly talked about, especially not with Seungmin himself. By the time he’s awake again, he’s always long since detached himself from whoever was next to him and he never says anything about it. No one is actually sure if he’s even aware of this behavior. But they don’t dare to address it either, worrying that it will make him uncomfortable or feel shy about it and then will try to avoid them. As it is, everyone’s happy – including Seungming -, and every once in a while, one of them gets to be lucky and get cuddled by him. It’s always been like this and it’s just one of those many little things about their group that makes the friendship feel special.

But apparently, one of them has been sorely missing out on all of this.

Chan, Felix and Jeongin are hanging out on the couch in the living room, Felix playing on his phone while the other two are watching a movie, when the sound of the apartment door announces the arrival of someone coming home. Not ten seconds later, Minho walks into the living room. He steers directly to the couch and folds himself bodily over the back of it, effectively faceplanting into the couch cushions right between Chan and Felix, letting out a tiny groan.

Almost automatically, Chan’s hand wanders over to affectionately ruffle his hair a bit, not taking his eyes off the TV screen.

“Rough day?” he inquires.

“Hhhhgh….” Minho once again groans into the cushions before turning his head to the side so he’s able to talk. “I actually wanted to spend the afternoon working a bit on the new choreography but Seungmin came over and made me go through some of our lines. Apparently he’s a bit worried about this one bridge part and –,” here he actually lifts his head up a bit to peek up at Chan. “Hyung, no matter where we end up one day. We can not let Seungmin be a vocal teacher. He’s a fucking genius but damn. He’s got expectations.”

Felix looks up from his phone, huffing an amused breath out of his nose. “Aw, was he mean to Hyung?” 

Minho glares over to him. “I didn’t say that. But he’s definitely demanding and not very patient at times, okay? He’s got this idea in his head and it’s brilliant but I’m not as good of a singer as he is and-” he gets cut off by Jeongin yeeting a cushion across the couch, smacking him right in the face and effectively shutting him up.

“No negative comparing and downtalking of skills,” the youngest dutifully recites one of their basic rules.

Minho splutters. “I wasn’t downtalking, I was actually pointing out how good he is,” he starts but gets interrupted by Felix.

“You were downtalking yourself and also definitely comparing. Stop it. You’re a wonderful singer and if you need a peptalk about that I can gladly do that or-,” he grins a bit diabolically, “ – I could write Jisung about it and he’s gonna take over the job.”

Felix cocks his head to the side, his smile now deceivingly innocent. They all know that Jisung would have a field day if he caught wind of Minho talking badly about his own singing skills and they’d never hear the end of it for days.

Even though Minho never actually gives Felix the tissue treatment – honestly, who could? -, Chan quickly intervenes to prevent possible trouble.

“Felix is right. Give yourself some slack. You’re under a lot of pressure lately but I know everything’s gonna work out alright. If you want, I can talk to Minnie for you, I know that when it comes to vocals he can sometimes be a handful.”

Jeongin sniggers at that. “More like an armful. While he’s asleep at least,” he comments quietly, causing both Chan and Felix to also chuckle and nod in agreement.

When no one seems to want to elaborate on that comment, Minho pushes himself up on his forearms and looks across Felix’ legs over to Jeongin. “What?”

His eyes still trained on the screen, Jeongin shakes his head, still smiling affectionately. “Oh you know how he gets when he’s asleep, he’s all cuddly and soft.” While talking, he briefly glances over to Minho but stops in his movement back to the screen when he sees Minho’s thoroughly confused face.

“When he…you know…I mean he gets very clingy and uses whoever’s close by as a life-sized teddy bear?” It sounds more and more like a question the longer Jeongin talks, Minho’s confused face making him momentarily question his past experiences with sleepy Seungmin.

“Yes, he’s so cute when he falls asleep and then just grabs onto you for cuddling. I always love when that happens,” Felix chimes in. “When he’s awake I never get enough Seungmin skinship.”

“I got to share with him last month when we were in Japan. He really is sweet when he sleeps.” Chan looks down to Minho now. “You…have you never slept with Seungmin in the same bed?”

Minho is about to give an answer when a loud slap to his butt makes him jolt upright and swirl around, his fist raised, but Jisung has already wisely retreated across the room onto the other side of the couch, a big grin on his face.

“Whoopsie!” he cackles and holds his hands up placatingly. “What did I miss?”

Minho scowls but lowers his arm again. He will probably take his revenge later and conveys as much with a glare Jisung will definitely be able to understand.

“We were just talking about sleepy Seungmin,” Felix explains.

Jisung immediately lightens up. “Ooh! He’s such a koala bear, just last week he –“

“Wait, wait, wait, hold up,” Minho interrupts him. “Are you all in on a joke I’m somehow missing or are you seriously telling me that our Kim Seungmin is a hugger in bed?” He looks genuinely confused.

Chan cranes his neck to look back at him standing behind the couch and smiles. “I can’t believe you’ve actually been missing out on this. Seungmin gives Felix a run for his money as soon as he falls asleep, yes.”

Minho looks at his friends, contemplating for a moment if they’re really being serious, before crossing his arms and letting out a small huff. “Ok. I call dibs on sharing the next double bed hotel room with Seungmin then. If he’s okay with that of course.”

And so it was decided.

As it turns out, Seungmin actually is okay with sharing a room and a bed with Minho the next time they all haggle about who gets which room at the place they’re staying at.

By the time he’s settled into bed, Minho is more than a little curious about what’s gonna happen. But he’s got his professional poker face on when Seungmin comes out of the bathroom and slips underneath the covers on his side of the bed.

“Good night, Hyung,” he says as he turns off his bedside lamp and immediately settles in for the night, not even playing on his phone.

“Good night, Seungmin-ah.”

Minho glances over to him. It’s been an exhausting day of travel for all of them and so it’s no surprise when Seungmin’s breath evens out after just a couple of minutes, going deeper with sleep. Peering through the darkness of the room, Minho can barely make out his phone and his diary he had been writing in earlier, laying on his friend’s bedside table.

Seungmin fell asleep with his back turned to Minho, his blanket pulled up all the way to the tip of his nose. After just some minutes though, he suddenly begins to grow a bit restless, and Minho almost holds his breath as he gets to witness Seungmin wiggling and scooting his way across the mattress over the course of the next couple of minutes until he’s arrived on the other side of the bed. Minho’s side. Where Minho is waiting with bated breath, feeling abnormally excited. He’s laying on his back, making sure to be in a position he can actually comfortably fall asleep in. Against his shoulder, Seungmins huffs out a tiny breath in his sleep before nuzzling his face against him. Minho is not a person to easily coo at others but oh my god.

A hand suddenly scoots out from underneath Seungmin’s blanket and before Minho can blink twice, there’s an arm draping itself over his torso, closely followed by a leg twining with his. The movements are slow and though with a clear goal, not very deliberate. Seungmin definitely seems to be fast asleep and yet knows exactly what he wants. ‘How fitting, actually,’ Minho finds himself thinking. Seungmin scoots a bit closer still and after some more shuffling around, settles against Minho’s side with a content sigh.

Minho can’t help but stare down at him. He’s not sure he’s ever seen the other boy so relaxed before. Jeongin had described him as soft and Minho now understands exactly what he meant by that. He’s free to look at him without having to worry about if that quick brain is already cooking up a sassy remark. Often described as a little menace, Seungmin is not usually the one to be called sweet or soft. But right now, his mouth is closed into a little pout, his breath puffing softly against Minho’s sleeping shirt. Behind his eyelids, his eyes seem to shift around every now and then but his whole body is completely relaxed and at ease, only his shoulders moving a bit with each breath. Minho can’t help the big dopey smile on his own face. He sometimes gets labelled as the mum of the group – and he doesn’t mind that at all – and right now he actually feels so much affection for the second youngest, he has to consciously hold back from poking Seungmin’s nose or ruffling through his hair or something. He suddenly has a thought that actually makes him giggle quietly into the silence of the room. Usually, he has these urges when it comes to his cats. When they’re so cute that he just needs to bother them. But he will not do that now. Instead, he finally also closes his eyes and shimmies down a bit, getting even more comfortable and easily sinking into a restful sleep himself.

The next day, as he sits next to Felix in the car, the blond boy gently bumps his shoulder against Minho’s and smiles over to him. “Had a good night’s sleep?” he asks, his eyes clearly elaborating on that question. Immediately, Jisung perks up in the front seat and turns around to stare at Minho curiously, too. Minho just smiles softly and nods. “Oh yes, definitely.” He hesitates for a second before deciding to also add: “Very comfortable beds they had there.”

There’s a sudden snort from behind him from Seungmin and a finger poking at his neck through the head rest. “You were also very comfortable, Hyung. I’ve always thought your shoulder would be more boney.” And then proceeds to not elaborate on that at all.

In the front, Jisung stares at Seungmin with big, dumbfounded eyes, the car in complete silence for just a couple of seconds before Felix, Jisung, Hyunjin and Chan all start talking at the same time. “You know you’re a cuddler?” “Do you do it on purpose??” “I can’t believe I thought you didn’t know, oh my god I’m so embarrassed.” “Were you actually already awake when I woke up that one morning-“

They talk all over each other while Jeongin and Changbin start laughing and Minho grins, too, even though the tips of his ears have turned a bit red at the thought of Seungmin actually giving him a fucking review on his own snuggliness or whatever that was.

Seungming himself simply smiles his quiet smile, the little loved menace.

[warpedlegacywrites]

Happy Friday! From the platonic intimacy prompts - sender suddenly hugs the receiver for Theresa and whoever among her inner circle might be most surprised by a hug!

Happy @dadrunkwriting! This ended up being super cute, so thank you for this! Theresa explains hugs to Cole, though not in so many words.

“Inquisitor.”  “Hello Cole.” Theresa is hardly surprised anymore when the spirit makes his sudden appearances, merely considers herself grateful that he’s learned not to do so during inopportune moments. The last time he popped in on Bull and Dorian, she’d been saddled for days with his endless questions about aspects of her friends’ sex lives that were, frankly, none of her business.  This time, the only thing he’s interrupting is her nightly ritual of reading the day’s reports. And that’s a task she’s always more than happy to be distracted from. So it’s without malice or annoyance that she glances up from the letters in her lap to meet his questioning eyes.  “How can someone be starved of touch?”  Ah. “You’ve been listening to my thoughts again, have you?” “You said I could.”  She smiles at the wary defensiveness in his voice, as though he expects her to retract her permission at any moment. “That I did. Don’t worry, you’ve done nothing wrong.”  Truthfully, she considered it good practice for herself, to remember to clear her mind before sleep. It didn’t prevent all her nightmares, but it did help her sleep longer and deeper. And she had more motivation to have a clear mind if she knew someone was listening in. And when Cole still managed to slip through, well, better her to answer probing questions than her other companions.  “We mortals are social creatures,” she explains for his benefit. “If we go too long without physical contact with others, our bodies begin to miss it just as much as our hearts.”  “I understand, I think.” He tilts his head to look down at his palms, brushing his fingers over one with a thoughtful frown. “You become demons. But you stay yourselves.”  Theresa blinks, then smiles. “Yes, it’s a bit like that. Everyone will react differently, and it will take longer for some than others. Some may never feel it, or will feel it less. And some…”  “Some feel it more.” He looks up, glassy eyes seeing through her. “You don’t let yourself feel it, because you’re afraid of missing it too much. Afraid it will matter more than the light that burns you.”  Theresa grits her teeth and blinks back tears, forcing a smile. A face comes to mind, the one she’d been picturing while reading his words, when Cole had interrupted her. She’s holding his words in her lap still. Blunt and honest script, to match his language.  “Golden words, golden eyes, golden hair,” Cole intones. “He shines, and you’re afraid to dull him.”  “Yes,” she whispers, harsher than intended.  “Why is it in your heart?” he asks, and in her confusion, her heartache is temporarily forgotten.  “Why is what in my heart?”  “The ache. If you’re starved, shouldn’t it be in your stomach?” He lays a hand over his own stomach, frowning down at it as though it will explain things for him.  Theresa laughs. A sudden surge of affection pulls her to her feet, and in a flash she’s wrapped her arms around Cole’s shoulders and hugging him fiercely. He makes a surprised exclamation, and she releases him, just in case. But he’s not upset. In fact, he’s smiling.  “Is that what you miss?” he asks, almost shyly.  “Yes.”  “I think I understand better, now.”  She returns his smile. “I’m happy to help.”  “Me too.”