#please others add on because this is something i haven't seen before i'm very excited

[gonzo-rella]

Headcanons: Being Married To Old Man Ray Stantz

MASTERLIST | AO3 | KO-FI

Relationship(s): old man!Ray Stantz x gn!also old!reader (romantic)

Warnings: Possibly inaccurate science words, because I'm a simpleton. (Let me know if I need to add any)

(A/N: Here's my first Ghostbusters thing! I've got a few other Ghostbusters fics in the works, mostly Ray-based reader-inserts because I'm in love with him, but I've also got a Phoebe-centric character study in the works that's based on part of her storyline in Frozen Empire. By the way, I loved Frozen Empire! I've already seen it three times, and it's such a joy. I'll try to catch it a couple more times at least before it leaves cinemas. Anyway, I haven't included any explicit spoilers for Frozen Empire in this, so you're safe to read this if you haven't seen it yet. I'd love to write more old man Ray Stantz fics, especially something involving Phoebe. I'm really excited to write for Ghostbusters, so feel free to send in requests! I've only seen the movies, but I plan on watching the Real Ghostbusters at some point soon. Also, even though I took my mum to see Frozen Empire the other day, I still don't have anyone to talk to about this movie, so please feel free to talk to me about it!)

It’s evident that, even after all of these years, Ray is still madly in love with you.

The adoration with which he looks at you is clear as day.

Venkman has always loved to tease you both about how sickly sweet your relationship is.

He will make fake gagging when either of you are affectionate to one another when he’s around.

(He won’t admit it, but he actually finds your relationship to be kind of cute)

It’s not like either of you are overly lovey-dovey, especially now.

Ray’s naturally a very passionate and expressive guy, but he’s rarely mushy.

Still, you show one another how much you care.

I have this idea that your silent way of saying ‘I love you’ to each other is holding the other’s hand, stroking their knuckles with your thumb and smiling at them.

It just seems so cute to have this thing that you’ve been doing for your whole relationship.

Ray knows you like the back of his hand, and you know him just the same.

It’s almost scary how well you know one another.

I can imagine that there’s been a time that someone’s asked one of you a question, and the other has been able to answer it with ease.

I love the idea of Ray being with someone who’s not a scientific mind like himself.

So, if you’re not as knowledgeable about the supernatural as Ray, you’ll still have picked up on plenty of information against your will, and Ray will always be impressed with and proud of you when you manage to regurgitate or understand his ‘science-y word salad’ (as you have referred to it).

He will also find it very attractive when you talk supernatural or science to him, but he tries not to make it obvious.

His eyes still light up like he’s a kid on Christmas when he explains supernatural stuff to you or tells you about a new psychically charged item he’s bought, and you find it so endearing.

Also, I can imagine him practically forcing you to listen to Podcast’s podcast when he discovers it, and you both end up getting really into it.

As devoted as he still is to his work and his supernatural endeavours, spending time with you is his greatest priority.

He might miss being an active Ghostbuster, but the silver lining of it is that he gets more time with you than he ever used to.

Even if you both used to be Ghostbusters, it’s nice to spend time together that doesn’t involve being covered in ghost slime and shouting over nuclear accelerators.

If you’ve not got anything else to do, I think it’d be sweet if you kept him company in his store.

Phoebe and Trevor are your honorary grandkids and you and Ray are beyond proud of them, especially Phoebe, who you’re closest to of the two of them.

Phoebe will always remind the both of you of Egon, so whenever she does something particularly Egon-like, you will exchange a knowing glance, and when she’s gone you’ll end up reminiscing about your old friend.

If Phoebe or the other Spenglers ever want to hear about Egon, you’re both more than happy to talk to them about him.

Even in his golden years, Ray is still the same sweet, passionate, excitable man you married all those years ago.

Sure, the regular excitement that came with Ghostbusting is long behind you both, but you both cherish this quieter time together just as much.

[davidmariottecomics]

Save Your Work!

Hello, friends! 

This week is going to be very quick because, not to get ahead of myself, but next week is likely going to be pretty long. I didn't mean to time things out so there'd be a long one right after I'm done with work for the year and most people are off for that final week, but that's how things worked out. And the week after that, the last weekend of the year, I'm going to do a Best of 2023 round-up. 

But, in my brief update this week, I wanted to talk about some very straightforward best practices. 

I turned on my computer this morning and was shocked to find that I was *turning on* my computer this morning. One way or another, it had shut down since the last time I used it. Maybe it was Becca or a planned restart or something, but however it happened, my computer was off. And as any artist should know... you neeeeeeeeeeeed to make sure your stuff is saved again and again. You see, I was working on my holiday gift guide that I'm building for my Patreon when the computer shut off and I lost a whole spread and some change. All of it. The images, the hyperlinks, the text--both in terms of what I wrote and the font choices I made--everything. It shouldn't be terrible, but it'll add at least an extra hour on as I have to rebuild all of that. So, if you ever work on anything that would benefit from being saved, make sure you do!

The other best practice I want to emphasize today is something I say a lot. If you'd like to work in comics professionally, please make it easier on yourself and any potential collaborators/hiring folks, by making your web presence clear and accessible. Something I've slowly been working on over the past few weeks is going through my Twitter as I get ready to delete it before the end of the year and looking to make sure I have contact information from anyone I'm interested in not losing. I'm looking for emails, or agents, or websites. And the more varied the information, the better. Because I'm trying to incorporate that into my existing digital rolodex, whenever possible, while emails (for talent or their agents) are the things that are most helpful, I am looking to add your website info so I can quickly pop to it before emailing you and make sure you're who I think you are and your style is what I think it is. As much as possible, when I look through info I got from old like Visible Women sheets and the like, I'm looking for people who aren't just including their handle on one social because those can change, or who aren't just linking to an Instagram or Twitter account with "DM me" because while I know some people work best in DMs, for legal paperwork and the like, an email is so much more helpful. 

Lastly, and this should go without saying, but this is a post about common sense practices, be kind to folks. I don't know why this seems so counter-intuitive to certain people, but if you're openly hostile toward your peers, they don't want to work with you. It's a self-fulfilling prophecy of ostracization. It literally can't be said enough. Comics as an industry is doing just fine and differentiation in the medium in both format and talent is only a good thing. 

Alright. More next week! 

What I enjoyed this week: Dungeons & Daddies (Podcast), Reverse 1999 (Video Game), Nancy (Comic), Lego Masters (TV show), Out There Screaming: An Anthology of New Black Horror (Short story collection), Yu-Gi-Oh: Duel Links (Video Game), Dandadan (Manga), Godzilla: Minus One (Movie), Godzilla Raids Again (Movie), Cunk on Earth (TV show), I'm a Virgo (TV show), Clyde Fans by Seth (Comic), getting and making some really exciting 2023 news. There's some amazing stuff to come! 

New Releases this week (12/13/2023): Sonic the Hedgehog: Winter Jam (Editor)

Final Order Cutoff next week (12/18/2023):  Godzilla Valentine's Day Special (Editor) If you haven't seen it, I put together a little explainer on what exactly a "Final Order Cutoff" is and why it matters! And if you found this helpful and have a platform where you think people should know, those explainers are watermarked and good to share! 

New Releases next week (12/20/2023): Godzilla: The War for Humanity #3 (Editor) Godzilla Rivals: Jet Jaguar vs. Megalon (Editor)

Announcements: If there is one blog this year that you should not miss, it's next week's. Big news to come. 

The Cartoonist Cooperative is still doing E-Sim cards for Gaza. You can donate a digital sim card so that residents can get access to the internet and have more functional phones and, in exchange, get some comics or a drawing or whatever else is available from the many participating artists. Additionally, the CC is hosting their mini-comic awards! It's a cool way to maybe get your mini-comic recognized and make some scratch! 

You can also give more directly. If you don't have money, and I get it, you can call or fax or email or show up at the offices of your representatives. Keep your eyes open for actions too, whether they're another general strike like what happened last Monday or demonstrations and marches in your area. Given the nature of the things, they often come together fairly quickly, so do exercise your due diligence. Also, of course, being informed and just giving your time to Palestinian writers is incredibly valuable. Whether that is journalists on the ground--who are being murdered at extraordinary rates--or reading Fiyah's Palestine Solidarity issue or anything from Verso's solidarity reading list, having and sharing that knowledge is significant. 

Becca just did their Art vs. Artist post for 2023. They did a lot of really cool work this year! They also posed a spicy art version. And as if it could not be said enough, while we've got some things brewing (and now on a schedule), you should reach out if you'd like to work on comics with them! I think we're both looking to do more next year! You can find their gallery on their website and also, y'know, maybe pick up a few things for belated gifts while you're there! 

If you aren't a Patreon backer yet, well, like I said above, I've been working on something pretty cool. I'm building a holiday gift guide. It won't probably be out with a lot of shopping time for Christmas in particular, but I thought it'd be a fun way to showcase some of what I've been learning more generally about design and how to make comics and zines and stuff. I'm really proud of it and it'll be exclusive to $10+ backers for December and then will be made public in a couple months. Also at that $10+ tier, there's stuff like a tour of my workspace, an adults-only podcast pilot that Becca and I recorded called "Abandoning the Premise" (short sample here), a review of root beers is also coming up quick, old D&D campaigns I ran, and more! Another goal of mine for next year is to grow my Patreon and also have it start making some money to fund more comics ventures for myself. 

Pic of the Week: I teased it last week, but the Winter Jam team did a Winter Jam-piece! Our fabulous leader, Iasmin Omar Ata, got Reggie Graham, Adam Bryce Thomas, Abigail Oz, Shawn Lee, and me to put together a happy holidays card from the Winter Jam cast! I did the thought balloon Froggy because even when Big is holding "Froggy", he can't stop thinking about that frog! 

[yumeasmrscript]

[ASMR script] [A4A] Whenever you're too scared to eat, we can eat together

Tags: [TW: Eating disorder] [Emetophobia] [Partner Speaker] [Anxiety] [Skipping meals] [Comfort] [One bite at a time] [You will be okay!] [Loving relationship]

Author's note: Hi everyone! First thing first: this script is written as A4A, but feel free to edit it to fit as M4F, F4M, F4F, M4M, etc. English is not my first language, you can also edit a few things here and there to make things sound less "weird" if there's the need. You are also free to edit/add/remove sfx of your choice! You are allowed to monetize, just please credit me <3

More notes you can just skip: So, this script is very specific and kinda personal. The phobia of throwing up is a nasty fear to deal with, and sometimes it can lead to serious health issues because when you're too scared of the idea of feeling sick, you stop eating as a way of avoiding the (often very very vary small, close to impossible actually) chance of throwing up. I didn't know there were so many people with this phobia, and I haven't seen many scripts related to this topic, because often the not-eating problem is related other form of anxiety/issues. So, I decided to make one related to this phobia, and hopefully it will help those who could have struggled eating for this very reason! Remember you are not alone in this, and that if it feels too much to handle, you can seek help through therapy (and take it from me, it can be better. It will get better!)

Summary (for listener): Your loved one comes home after work and wants to take you out for dinner but you're not that hungry, plus you have some leftovers. The problem is: they saw you skipping breakfast and the same leftovers were supposed to be your lunch. They realize now you have been skipping meals, so you tell them about your phobia of throwing up and, as a consequence, your fear of eating.

[Action/things happening] *Moods* Emphasis on a specific word

_________________________

[Door opening and closing]

Honey, I'm home! What a day... Today it was much more chaotic than usual there.

[Removing coat]

Hi there sweetie, let me give you a hug [pause] ...and some kisses [Kisses here] What were you watching?

Just the boring news? Ooh, I see, you were waiting for a show to start. Mind if I sit next to you, so we can get bored at the news together, while we wait for it? [another Kiss]

[Sitting on the couch]

*Relaxed* Aaah, bless whoever invented the couch… [Kisses, caresses] ...It feels so weird coming home and finding you waiting for me, you know? In a good way, of course. Knowing you will be here when I return, it's fuel to get through the day. It's not even two weeks since we moved in together, but I feel like I already got addicted to this feeling [chuckle]. I can’t help but look forward to the moment we can just relax and cuddle.

[Chuckle] You too? ...Aww, yes, that's the smile that keeps me going. How was your day, sweetheart?

Tough day at work for you too huh?

*Excited* Oooh, but you have some gossip? I can't wait to hear all about it! You know I’m always in for the tea. Hey, you know what? Since we're both coming from a draining working day, why don't we just go somewhere nice for dinner? 'Cause... now that I think about it, we still didn't get the chance to go out for dinner since we moved in together. And even before, it feels like ages since last time! I can't even remember when it was. So… yeah, what do you think? Dinner's on me, of course!

*Slightly disappointed* Hm? Why not? I mean, it's not like we have to, but... not having to cook and clean afterwards sounds like a good deal to me when we're both tired, don’t you think?

*Gentle* You're too tired from work to go out? Well... I guess, we can stay at home for tonight, then. Hmm, what about just ordering delivery? I mean, same thing but we can chill here, watching something that’s, hopefully, not the news... cuddling a little bit, relax... how does it sound, honey?

*Confused*You're... not that hungry? Uhm, yes, I can order something for myself but... what if you get hungry later?

*Lighting up the mood* Hey, don't expect me to give you half of mine if you change your mind! You know that you are my favorite person and I love you more than anyone, but food is… well, food. [Laugh] I’m joking, I'm joking. Kind of. [Chuckle] In all honesty though, I wouldn't mind sharing, but... listen, why don't you just order something anyway? So that if you get hungry later you still have something to eat, and if you don't... you have something for tomorrow's lunch anyway.

*Confused* Huh? What do you mean there's no need?

The... leftovers? Wait a moment, we still have leftovers from yesterday’s dinner? I thought… I thought you had it for lunch?

You didn't? So... you ate something else at work?

*Mockingly* Oooh, wait, I know what happened. Let me guess: you forgot to bring them with you and you had to buy a crappy and expensive sandwich at your workplace, didn't you? [Chuckle] That would clearly explain everything.

*Confused again* No? What did you get then? I didn't know there were other options to sandwiches there...

Okay,"Something", but what exactly?

*Slightly concerned and confused* Hey, what's wrong? What's with that expression? Is there something botheri-

Huh? Water? You mean... you want to drink water now, or...

Oh, you had... water... at work? For lunch?! I mean... wait, wait a moment, let me get this straight:

Yesterday evening you weren't hungry because you told me you had "something" at work before coming home, and I assumed it was one of those crappy, sad, sandwiches, so you skipped dinner because of that. This morning you said you only wanted your herbal tea. At lunch you had "water" and now you want to skip dinner too?

*Worried* Just... just be honest with me. When exactly was the last time you actually ate something? Like, a meal?

*Assertive* No, no, look at me. And Water doesn't count. Tea doesn't either. When was it?

*More worried* What- what do you mean you don't remember?! Okay, okay, let's make it easier: when was the last time you ate anything? A cookie? Fruit? A… dunno, protein bar?

*Frustrated, but trying to be calm* No, I'm not- of course I'm not angry, I'm just worried! As far as I know, the last time I actually saw you eat something was three days ago when you had half of an apple for breakfast! I... I was sure you were eating at your workplace most of the time, so I didn't really think much about it, but... oh goodness, please, tell me you had something since then. Anything really. Tell me you're not starving right now.

*Concerned, but more calm* Okay, so... yesterday, at lunch time, you ate kinda two spoons of peanuts, more or less. And... is that it? Nothing else?

*More gentle* No, don't apologize! I'm... not angry, really. I just... don't understand. Are you feeling under the weather or something and I didn't realize it? Or, I don't know, there's something worrying you to the point you don't feel like eating?

Whatever the reason is, why didn't you tell me? You know I'm here for you, just like you have always been here for me when I needed it. *Sweet* You have always supported me whenever I felt sad, angry, worried... You know that we are a team, right? So, please honey, tell me what's wrong.

*Frustrated again, less gentle* No, it's not "fine"! Not eating anything aside from a few grams of peanuts one day, half of an apple another one, it's not "fine" at all! I... for goodness sake, I don't want to be inappropriate but... how much weight did you lose?

It's not like I didn’t notice you felt… thinner whenever I hugged you, but... I just didn't think it was that serious, and I didn’t want to be intrusive. I didn't think you were skipping meals and avoiding food almost every day, I... I just...

*Sad* Sigh, I swear I'm not angry honey, really, I'm only really worried. I… don’t want anything bad to happen to you, I care so much about you! Please, just… tell me why, let me understand.

You are... scared? Eating gives you anxiety? But... why? Is it for your body? *Still worried, but more gentle and reassuring* Because I assure you that there's nothing wrong with your body. You are the most wonderful and attractive person I know, and I love everything about you, really. Your mind, your soul, and your body too. And I don’t care how and if your body changes, I’ll still love you for who you are.

...Okay, so it's not for that. Then... what is it? Hey, look at me. You can talk to me about anything.

*Frustrated/concerned* No, it's not dumb! No reason is a dumb reason if it makes you starve sweetie. I'm not here to judge, I just want to understand better.

So...You are afraid to... throw up? Wait, but... why would you throw up? You are healthy, the food you eat is good too, there's no stomach bug around… I don’t understand, and--

Oh, I’m sorry, just… Hey, ssh, don't cry, it's okay... I didn't know you had this kind of fear... [kiss] and I didn't know it was tormenting you this much. I’m so sorry honey…

*Comforting* Yes, I bet it’s frustrating… you’re actually really hungry, huh? But you’re too scared to eat because of the idea that could get you sick.

It... does explain a few things though. Like the fact that you avoid alcohol, or you refuse to eat anything beyond their expiration date even though it still tastes good. Or also that time when you canceled a meeting with your friend after you discovered they had a stomach bug. Sigh, I'm really sorry for being so blind, I'm connecting the dots just now. I just... wish you had told me sooner. Come here, let me hug you. I don’t want you to feel uncomfortable. I told you already: we are a team. If you struggle with something, I’ll struggle with you until we find a way to overcome it, together. All right?

Good, honey. [Kiss]

So... how do you usually deal with it?

Okay, so... you only eat as little as possible when you feel too hungry to resist? Well... yes, in some way, the fact that your stomach is empty could be some sort of reassurance for you when you are afraid of throwing up. But you do realize you can't go on like this, right? You're losing weight, and it's not going to stop if you keep eating like this. Or rather, “non-eating��� like this.

*Relieved* Sigh, I’m glad it’s not always like this, and this is just the worse it can get. In fact, now that I think about it, when we started dating I don’t remember you avoiding eating this much. I mean, yes, we usually ate at home and when we ate outside you always got something light.

It was more problematic before meeting me? I’m happy to know that you were able to deal with it in the past, at least for a while. So… is it just a relapse? Or maybe what you tried before wasn’t enough?

I see… Okay, so, hear me out. You already did it once anyway, and... I’m sure it’s hard. Because, when you are scared of… I don’t know, a dog maybe? Or a spider? You can run away, and the problem ends there. But… [sad chuckle] you’re right, you can’t run away from you stomach. It’s always there and… you have to learn to live with it.

Oh, honey, I figured. I’m sure you love food, and it’s frustrating for you too having to give up what you love because of your phobia. I’m sure you’re telling the truth, because when we talk about your favorite food, I can see the light in your eyes, but it… vanishes after a few seconds, because you probably think something like “I won’t be able to eat it anyway”. It is difficult, but, the good news is… you can do this. You can eat, and 99,99% of the time you will be more than fine. Look at me: I don’t even remember the last time I felt sick. And what about you? You told me the last time you threw up was years ago. The chance of throwing up are close to zero when you don’t have any health issues and, trust me, if you had any serious health issues, you probably would have felt sick even without eating. So...

*Calm* Okay, First thing first, take a deep breath with me, so you can relax.

[Deep breath]

*Gentle* Good, now, let’s wipe those tears away… And… let’s do this: I’ll find a way to eat the leftovers tomorrow for lunch myself. I’m sure they’ll still be good. Tonight we’re getting a delivery of your favorite food instead, and...

Hey, honey, don’t say “no” right away. Try to change your thinking from “I can’t eat it” to “I am able to eat it. I can eat it. And I enjoy eating, because it’s my favorite food”. Remember that your body knows what it needs to be done, and when you give fuel to your body, there’s a very, very little chance that your body will send it back. Anxiety doesn’t help the hunger, I know, but trust me: you will be okay. Would I ever lie to you?

No, exactly. So: we’re getting a delivery of your favorite food...

Okay, you’re nodding now, good. Then, you just take one bite.

Yes, just one. And I’ll get just one bite too.

Then, we wait let’s say… 60 seconds. In the meantime you can take deep breaths, drink a sip of water, or just… watch tv with me. Then, we take another bite. Slowly, chewing as much as possible, and then another pause. You can also hold my hand during all of this whenever you feel the anxiety coming, ‘cause I’ll be with you for each bite.

We’ll keep eating just one bite at a time, until you feel relaxed enough to eat a little bit on your own, or until you feel satisfied.

And, when we’re done, we can drink something warm that will help your digestion. Not that it really needs any help, because your body can do anything on its own, but it will be helpful for your brain. Because knowing it will help your digestion, it will make you relax a little bit. And, if you relax too, that will truly help even more. Okay? Do you want to try this with me? I won’t force you eat anything you don’t want, and we’ll stop when you will say so. I’m sure you will do your best, because that’s one of the many reasons why I admire you.

*Relieved* Good. [Kiss]

Mh-mh, I’m glad you will talk to your doctor about it. Remember that you are not alone in this, and if you need help of any kind when you need to eat, I’ll be here for you. I’m… just glad you told me before it was too late. [Kiss] I just want you to feel calm and serene whenever and whatever you eat. If you already found a way to do it in the past, I’m sure you will do it again.

And when you least expect it, I’m sure you will find the joy in eating once again. Until then… I’ll be with you, for each step of the way.

You’re welcome, sweetheart… [Kiss] I love you too.

[shadesofmauve]

2022 Writing Wrap Up

Total words published: 149, 266. All but 947 of them published three days ago.

Additional words written: Oh, hell, your guess is as good as mine. I've got Perpetual Soup documents simmering over here, I take bits from them and add to them all the time. Like, google is crashing rather than admit that the Epic Scrap Yard doc has been around and perpetually changing since 2011. I know I had 4000 words on the next chapter before the clock struck midnight on the 31st; I can't remember how much I added to @swaps55' fav upcoming arc (aka Kai Leng's Worst Mistake Ever) or the Vortex of Tears, but I know it was something.

Grand total of words: 149,266++! Only not, because I didn't write all those; many were first published years ago, and even the re-writes represent about three years of work. So who the hell knows.

Fandoms: Mass Effect, of course. I've also added small amounts to an original novel idea, but mostly world-building notes.

Highest everything (raw kudos, hits comments): Of all time? It's always A Star to Steer Her By for hits, kudos, and bookmarks. I'm pleased to see Sunset and Evening Star beats it for subscriptions, though!

Highest kudos-to-hits ratio: Okay, I don't think this is fair. People come re-read aStSHB, but they can only leave kudos once. Like, far and AWAY the biggest k:h ratio is for Copilots, which is a tear-jerker short fic I gave to @musanocturnis in a holiday exchange because I'm a horrible friend. It only has 45 hits total, but people who go "I know, I want to CRY!" and click on it are apparently getting what they signed up for.

New things I tried: Um. Hrm. @swaps55, what did I try that was new? :P I wanna say there's something in the Emotional Cascade Failure chapter, but it wasn't so much new as hard. There's a lot of emotional stuff in SaES that's very much putting myself in situations I have no experience with — which is always part of writing, and is new every time.

Fic I spent the most time on: Sunset and Evening Star, no question.

Fic I spent the least time on: Shipmates, my lil' exploration of how Joker and Kaidan met.

Favorite thing I wrote: I like a LOT of what I wrote this year, which is an awesome feeling! I get giggly-excited over some space combat sections that haven't seen the light of day yet, and about anything with Alejandro. I'm very pleased with coming up with the Poss'm acronym. And Joker and Kaidan's ridiculous N7 Craft Hour conversation cracks me up more than it should, for sure.

Favorite thing I read: I've done way, way more writing than reading of fic, but it's got to be one of the scenes with the Yang Gang from @swaps55' Cantata. I just love their whole dynamic. The needlepoint wall sends me, and I'm going to work a reference to it in somewhere. I also really liked Wish I May, Wish I Might by @spaced0lphin, who's out there single-handedly providing every possible form of content for the Shoker fandom including a frickin' game mod. (Which I haven't yet played for the same reason I haven't read the Tiger By My Side rewrite, @spaced0lphin — keeping my own story clear while I'm neck deep in it, and not having time :( — but the original TBMS was my fav Shoker long fic, back in the day, so...)

Writing Goals for 2023: PUBLISH NEW CHAPTERS! We're lookin' good, just gotta keep going.

New works: Just Shipmates, I think. Though my main fic is so damn long I sort of feel like the new chapters count. That'd be A Bunk on the Normandy, Emotional Cascade Failure, and Possum, most of Trust, then the new chapter Shipmates (which is different than the short fic, titles are just hard, okay). There's other new stuff through-out, but those are almost 100% new.

Tagging: @writes-in-space, @spaced0lphin, @virusq

[alex-and-coffee]

So. I need to get my thoughts out on the last Doctor Who special. I've seen posts with takes that I very much disagree with and didn't want to derail them with my thoughts, so here we are.

(Also. These are my personal thoughts and so they are going to be very self centered. That said, I am open to discussion if you wanna add your two cents.)

(Also also. This became an ESSAY lmao I had more to say than I thought so I'm putting in a read more so it doesn't completely take up your dash haha)

I will first say that I do agree that not mentioning Martha and Yaz weird. They were important to the Doctor and I can't think of a reason why they weren't mentioned among the others. Also, the ending to The Giggle wasn't great. It was anticlimactic, rushed, and made the Toymaster seem like he wasn't an actual threat? It felt more like someone was pulling his strings tbh. There are probably more things I could say about it but this post isn't about my criticisms of the episodes.

Another quick note, I like the bi-regeneration. My interpretation is 15 is the regeneration of 14 after he's lived his life, but instead of regenerating at the end of 14's life, he's regenerating early because of the Toymaker.

To start with the first thing that has me ruffled is that, to me, Ncuti shone in the role as the Doctor. He was charismatic, joyful and fun - we're getting something different and exciting. We got time with him before his first official episode and that made me very excited for his run as the Doctor (I will add that after seeing the trailer that I am worried about the Christmas special because goblins eating babies? Antisemitism anyone?).

This episode was the happy ending for 14 and the exciting beginning for 15. I don't understand where the complaints of 15 being undercut or being overshadowed by 14. To me it functioned as a soft reset - we got 14 settling down with the Mott-Noble-Temple family to rest and heal from his trauma while 15 goes and starts his adventures without all the baggage of 9-14's runs. Healing isn't linear either, and he still has that history so it can be referenced to and can come up later, but 15 is truly happy ("fixed" - though I hate that they phrased it that way) in a way that he hasn't been in NuWho (I haven't seen classic Who so I can't say anything about it). People don't change until the pain of not changing outweighs the pain of staying the same. If we didn't see that change happen in the Doctor, then I wouldn't have bought a transition from Jodi's Doctor (who represses absolutely everything) to Ncuti's Doctor, who's been magically "fixed".

I've seen several posts about how 14 regressed on 13's happiness and made the Doctor sad again, which. I would say misinterprets 13 in a pretty fundamental way. Her smile and happiness is a mask 13 hides behind. She's hurting and bottles all of it up to shove out of sight in the hopes that if she ignores it it will go away. She's running away just as much as her previous regenerations, which is shown in the way that she doesn't share anything personal about herself. She doesn't talk about her history with anyone she travels with, she even brushes her hurt off when Jack, who has been with her through some of her shit, asks if she's ok. (This. might not be the best point bc it feels like Jack excepts her to be ok, and 13 does have people pleasing tendencies, but still. They're friends and he does care about her. I think getting thrown into prison to break her out demonstrates this point.) Even when the fam corner her and ask if she's ok, it never continues into a productive conversation - either she deflects or it gets awkward fast because they don't know how to reply to what she's said and it never goes anywhere. She's such a repressed mess I don't know how anyone interprets her as genuinely happy. (Just to note before anyone thinks I'm hating, I do love 13. She's pretty high up on my list of favourite Doctors.)

Now (the main reason why I wanted to make this post), to explain why I think Donna is kind of the perfect person for the Doctor to go to to stop and rest and heal. (Disclaimer - 10 and Donna are my favourites. While I love them a whole lot, I am trying to be fair when I think about this. Please keep that in mind.)

Of the NuWho companions, after crossing off the people that are dead, not on this Earth/universe, and left of their own volition; you are left with Donna and Yaz.

(I'm struggling to keep things kind of concise, so I'm going to make a list that is hopefully comprehensive.)

I'm going to start with Yaz, and I do like her, but I'm gonna outline why I don't think she would be a good option.

Yaz is young. She's in her early 20's, and as someone who is also in their early 20s, I'm gonna straight up say that helping someone rest and recover through lifetimes (multiple!) of trauma is not something Yaz is going to be equipped to handle.

Yaz has only just started her life. She's driven and loves the adventures she's had with the Doctor, so much so that she stayed with the Doctor after everyone else left. Yaz would get as restless as the Doctor, resulting in either more adventures or resentment.

Yaz is in love with her. We get the scenes where the Doctor says she would but can't, and in them Yaz looks heartbroken. If the circumstances were different then maybe they could have, but they're not so they can't. Yaz needs time to heal her heartbreak, which she can't really do if the Doctor is still around (and whether or not the Doctor is 13, they're still the Doctor and would still be difficult for Yaz. Also difficult for the Doctor bc she did love Yaz but her fear and trauma was unfortunately too much for her to risk it).

Just to repeat, I think Yaz should have been mentioned in the episode. It doesn't make sense for someone who the Doctor has explicitly stated they loved not to be mentioned.

And here are the reasons why I think Donna was the good choice.

Donna and the Doctor make each other better during their run together. Donna reminds him that he can do good, even if the impact is small. The Doctor shows her that she matters, and is brilliant.

Although he doesn't know it at the time, the Doctor is given an opportunity to save Donna and return her memories, undoing one of the things he has massive guilt over.

Donna is someone who has settled down. She has a house, a husband, a kid. She knows what it's like to go a bit crazy being stuck in one place (even if not for the same reasons). She has the ability and experience to help the Doctor through it. She is also someone who will enforce his rest and healing while knowing what it's like to want to be doing something.

Donna also comes with an added support system because her family is pretty close knit, with a particular spotlight on Wilf ('I'd be proud to have you as a father', anyone?).

This so pretty long and if you're still here then thanks for reading! Mainly I wrote it to put my thoughts out there so I don't explode. If you have any thoughts about this and are gonna be nice about it, then feel free to add to this post :)

[bunnywifegames]

♡◦◦ Bunny's First Impressions: Sun Haven ◦◦♡

Sooooo I started playing Sun Haven and I have a lot of thoughts!! They're majority good because it is a really nice game and I'm having a lot of fun, and I am nowhere near done with the game I only just started. I thought that I would ramble a bit about my thoughts for anyone that was considering the game or just anyone that might have been curious!

Disclaimer: This is by no means a full blown review of the game considering I have only played for a couple days and therefor haven't really experienced much that the game has to offer. This is also not meant to sway anyone one way or another, rather just give some insight to some things and just ramble about my experience. I'm merely just a person who likes video games and likes to talk about them!

Introductions and Initial Thoughts

First things first, this game is BEAUTIFUL! It really is a nice looking game with a lot of aesthetically pleasing things about it that I find just wonderful. If you're like me, someone who enjoys pixel art games than this is right up your alley. Not to mention the designs are just very fantasy feeling for those that really like that sort of thing, like me. It's got similar mechanics and such to Stardew Valley and Harvest Moon, which it is obviously inspired by. And it does that well, in my opinion.

Not to mention the characters that I've seen so far are wonderful, and they seem to have some depth. I'm still getting through story stuff so I can't give you much there, but I am very interested! There seems to be a good bit of romanceable characters that are interesting, and give a lot of excitement to want to play multiple times over not just for them, but for the character creation as well!

Replay value is something I look in a game, and I genuinely believe this game will do that. It can be a bit dialogue heavy so far, but I don't see that being an issue for me, seeing as I'm used to that sort of thing. Plus, I can tell the care that went into the story so far, which goes a long way to me personally.

Character Creation

This is in its own separate thing, because I have a lot to say. From what I saw early on before I bought the game, it looked like there was a lot to offer in the way of character creation. I figured I would be there for a while, and believe me, I was! There were a lot of options that I had to weigh, and like I said above, I am nowhere near finished! I'm sure that there is a lot of options to unlock later on, which will open even more options for me to choose from to customize my character.

As far as inclusivity, there were definitely options for different hair textures and skin tones, however I felt like there could have been more. It's not my place to say whether or not it was good or not, but I can definitely tell you that there is a few! It seems like a fine base, but I know that from what I've seen from others comments, it's definitely not enough.

There is a few things that did disappoint me, considering these small personal things that no way hinder gameplay in any aspect. I felt like there were more options for some things and less for others, which was a little disappointing considering I went down the list of all different options that you could pick. For example, I was heavily looking forward to the option of the Amari, considering that it looked like I could live out my furry dreams. But I felt like it was a little lacking, especially in the fact that there weren't that many options other than dogs and cats, with a few reptiles (that didn't really have anything to be honest).

And given the fact that there was a bunny witch to romance, I was very shocked that there wasn't a bunny! I also felt as if there were less fun options for the dogs than there were cats, not to mention there weren't any fun fox or wolf stuff either. Again, this is all personal and in no way should be taken as anything other than that. I am only one person, and I do not speak for everyone! You can't add everything, but it just felt like considering the array of options, someone would end up out of luck with their pick.

Inventory Management and Crafting

This is its whole separate section bc I have a lot to say on the matter. First off, I love that you're not struggling with inventory space in the beginning! You don't have to worry about upgrading right off the bat and not having any room, and chests are relatively easy to get. However as I'm in early game, I'm running into a problem of having too many chests bc they feel kind of light to me. But again that could very well just be personal preference!

The one thing I am finding issue with is mainly just how many crafting machines there are, and how it seems to be incohesive and confusing. As someone who is disabled, it can be very overwhelming and difficult with lots of options. This is true for every game like this with crafting, however i'm finding that with all of the different crafting machines you need for things, it's hard to keep track. And it's often cluttered.

Half of my land is already taken up by all the machines I need, not to mention that it's confusing which can be made with which one. That's where the wiki is pretty much essential, and I know that kind of thing is not everyone's cup of tea. Having to consult a wiki for everything can be pretty extensively, though I don't mind it much. It's only frustrating when I realized that some things you'd expect to craft with one machine, you will need a whole new one for it instead.

While there's nothing wrong with the options, it can be really hard for someone with ADHD who's brain doesn't process that kind of thing very well. And again, this is just my experience, so that will be very different from others. Just a little thing that I feel like could have been condensed, but I absolutely enjoy the array of options that we have!

Gameplay

Like I said before, it's very similar to games like Stardew Valley and Harvest Moon in a lot of the gameplay aspects. There are an array of tools that you use to tend to your farm, as well as magic for whenever you're in combat! I'm very excited to delve deeper into the magic, and since I'm very early game I don't have a lot to say on that quite yet. However, it looks like a lot of fun!

One complaint that I've seen from these games is how the time seems to go by quickly or too slow, and they have included an option to adjust the way time flows in the game, which is very awesome. It's a great accessibility feature, and I have adjusted the settings myself to meet my own personal needs! And the game feels like it flows perfectly, and I don't ever feel rushed. In fact, I find myself going to bed a little early in game due to the fact that I have time set to go a little slower than I'm used to!

Not to mention the fact that, unlike a lot of these games, there is an autosave feature! You don't have to worry about having to run to bed and waste an entire day, because you need to save the game and shut off for the day. That was one of the biggest things that excited me about this, as well as my next point: Skill Trees!!!

I was so excited to see a massive array of skill trees to unlock, and while I can see it can be overwhelming for some, it gives me an excuse to keep playing and doing everything the game has to offer. There are so many different sets of skills to unlock more fun things, and this is where you'll get a lot of your upgrades to make your playing much faster and efficient. There are also a lot of other fun additions that they bring to your gameplay that I'm so excited to see in the future while I play.

Conclusion

There are so many things I didn't touch on, and this is only the surface of what the game has. I'm not really a game reviewer, just someone that loves video games and finds rambling about them fun! Please take this post with a grain of salt, and if this game sounds like something you'd enjoy, I would recommend it! Just be prepared to be thrown in for a loop for how many options they have for items, characters, and more! There is so much to this game, and am I excited to see what it has to offer!!

[somensfw-blue]

I was about to skeeps but horny brain?! At fhis hour?! Omgosh. Lmanbur knowing you haven't been eaten out before so when he does its like the mf is sending you STRAIGHT to heaven (in the good way) i feel like lmanbur isnt a very hard dom (just keeping ur hips still and waatever) but hes very lenient, letting you buck and roll your hips onto his face. And when you cum or are about to, he hums, just for the extra pleasure with the vibrations. Woof. - 🐩

a/n: :D i got carried away again. afab reader. i wanted to include beard but... the reader was about to cum when i remembered and at that point it was too late to add it /hj

warnings: none! just some good ol' soft oral. l'manbur is in his own little heaven

"can i eat you out?" he was shirtless, laying with his head on your chest, both of you curled up on the couch. and he asked the question as if asking if you wanted fries with your burger. you gawped down at him, cheeks heating.

you would be lying if you said that you hadn't thought about it, lying further if you hadn't thought about wil eating you out. but you'd never asked, not wanting to push. and had never told him that you hadn't ever been eaten out. but... he was asking...

"i've never um..." he shifted to meet your ryes

"never what?" he was asking to have you say it both because he didn't want to assume, and because he liked making you say what you wanted or needed in sex (both because consent, and he adored the way you got shy before saying something like "i want you to fuck me until i'm crying and stupid")

"i've never been eaten out." even though he pretty much knew you were going to say, his eyes still widened a little with surprise. then a smirk emerged

"so~" he dragged out the latter syllable "can i?" there was a glint of sheer excitement in with the lust that filled his eyes as he moved off of you, sitting next to your thighs

"yes please?" your tone didn't lilt up at the end because you were unsure as to whether you wanted him to eat you out because gods you did. it was more because you didn't like the way you were saying yes, thought you could have done it better

his hands ran up and down your thighs as you fidgeted with your fingers before moving one of your legs to the other side of him. he leaned down to give you a kiss, before sucking a hickey onto your neck, then pressing kisses down your clothed torso (you were wearing one of his white undershirts, one that had a hole burnt into it from a drugvan mishap) before he was kissing above the elastic of your underwear

"thank you for letting me do this, love." his words were soft against your skin "thank you for trusting me with this."

your hips wriggled and you let out a tiny, breathed moan as his fingers dragged down your thighs, taking your underwear with them.

it wasn't the first time that wilbur had seen your bare pussy, not by a long shot. but there was something about how you were still wearing a shirt - his shirt - and he was still fully clothed that had you wanting to hide yourself like you had all those years ago when you first started sleeping together.

"always so pretty. can't wait to taste" you hummed out a whine at his words, and wilbur moved you and himself so his face was positioned squarely in front of your cunt.

with one finger, he swiped up your hole, collecting some of your slick. that finger5 was quickly placed into his mouth with a moan, a sound that had your eyes fluttering.

two fingers slowly collected up more slick, then began rubbing circles on your clit, small moans and whimpers becoming more frequent. wilbur kept one hand on your hip - thumb rubbing circles on the bare skin - keeping your hips relatively pinned.

"is it still okay for me to do this?" a kiss to your thigh (right on a bruise you had gotten from walking into the corner of the dining table) as he asked for assurance

"yeah. please." the added please on your half was just you being used to begging him, but for wilbur, it was more than you giving consent, it was asking him. which was much more important.

with one more kiss, he slowly lowered his mouth, a lick all the way up from your dripping pussy to your clit, collecting slick with a gentle and grateful moan. and your voice cracked as you whined.

he began slow, trying to figure out what you did and didn't like (you liked all of it, but some caused your thighs to tense on either side of his head, and that was what he aimed for), working out how to make you feel euphoria with his mouth. your hands quickly threaded into his curls, pushing some back from his eyes but mostly there to give you purchase

"more, please wilbur. want more. need more." wilbur's pace quickened, beginning to suck on your clit between licks and swirls of his tongue. the hand that wasn't holding you down moved forward, and he pushed one finger into your cunt and moaned, purposefully creating a vibration that had you tugging his hair and your head lolling back

he was taking his time, even as he sped up, enjoying the feeling of your thighs on either side of his head (enjoying was an understatement. if he was being completely honest, he would happily live the rest of his life between your legs, and when he died his heaven would have him right there again) and the different pitch of moan when he sucked, or when the tip of his tongue would dip into you beside his fingers (you don't remember when a second was added, but the feeling was delicious)

you whined as wilbur slid his fingers out but the whine broke into a moan as his tongue pushed in as far as he could, taking to thrusting with it instead of his fingers. the moans you let out were pure sin, slightly muffled to wilbur as your thighs tightened around his head. your hips rolled and pushed closer to his mouth, hands pushing him closer again.

wilbur's fingers dug into your thighs, not to hold you down, just to hold, and your felt his nails bite into the skin. a loud moan and wilbur replied in turn against your pussy

as the coil tightened, and your thighs began to twitch and your moans started breaking in the way that wilbur knew meant you were close to cumming, he began to hum between moans. the bastard was humming his own goddamn national anthem. you gave his hair a tight tug to show your amusement to his choice of song, and he laughed before continuing to hum.

you couldn't bring yourself to protest further though, as the vibrations were right against your clit, alongside his tongue rolling it, and three fingers stretching and curling within you

your heels dug into his back and your thighs tightened again as that coil snapped, head thrown back with a load moan. wilbur's fingers and tongue never stopped, helping your orgasm last as long as he could, until finally your thighs loosened, twitching as he gave almost kitten licks

wilbur pulled his fingers out and sat up, and your heavy eyes looked at him, watching as he sucked the three fingers that were inside of you, a reflective film - a mix of your slick and cum - all over his mouth and chin and nose. when he pulled his fingers out with a 'pop' and began wiping his face with a thumb, he smiled down at you with nothing short of adoration in his eyes.

"feel good?" you sat up and lazily swatted at his arm

"fucking amazing." you glanced down at his crotch (bastard was wearing grey sweatpants, which had a small dark spot in the front now, along with what looked like an almost painful hard-on) "your turn?" quickly, he shook his head, giving you a quick peck on the lips before guiding you back to laying down

"oh no no. i want to do that again. almost made me cum in my pants."

yes i'm saying l'manbur wants to cum in his pants but i'm also saying that he wants to eat you out again. also him cumming in his pants from eating you out is hot

[hanemiso]

Operation: Dairy For Dazai

>>>a dazai osamu x reader<<<

request: "omg i love your post about Dazai and his possibility of having lactose intolerance hahaha, i wish you could do a fanfic out from that"

a/n: um this is such a great idea??? this was so much fun to write omg i hope y'all like it! also i know dazai doesn't necessarily drink coffee with milk and sugar/creamer, but for the sake of the story he does! also sorry if the gif looks weird, i couldn't find his weird little run anywhere else.

synopsis: no one has seen dazai drink milk or consume dairy of any kind...it's up to the agency to figure out if dazai is lactose intoleralnt or not!

warnings: one swear word, dazai not being able to handle dairy

"hey atsushi, you ever notice that dazai doesn't consume dairy?"

"what do you mean, y/n?" atsushi asks, glancing up at you from the computer.

"think about it. have you ever seen dazai drink milk? eat cheese? buy ice cream?" you press on, raising your brows.

atsushi takes a second to think before responding with, "now that you mention it, no i haven't...why are you asking anyway?"

"i think dazai is lactose intolerant."

you now have atsushi's full attention as he rolls closer to your desk and furrows his brows. he looks around the room for the brunette you're talking about before turning back to you, "you think so? i don't know...maybe it's like a dietary thing."

you deadpan, "you really think the man who goes out of his way to try new attempts at committing suicide--the one who came into the office with a hallucinogenic mushroom from a random mountain--is concerned with his own nutrition?"

atsushi goes silent and nods his head in agreement.

"come on, atsushi. i mean, why would that be the one thing out of his entire diet that he'd choose to cut out?"

"that's true, i've seen the kinds of things he eats...but why is this something you're interested in?"

"because, atsushi, the thought of THE dazai osamu even having one slight weakness--and the fact that it very well may be dairy, of all things-- is amusing. you don't find it interesting? that he can survive things like bullet wounds and getting kidnapped without any problem, but a glass of milk could completely ruin him?"

atsushi was beginning to take interest in what you were talking about. you had a point, he couldn't deny that. they don't know much about dazai and his life as it is. just as it began clicking in his brain, kunikida walks over to your desk to tell you both to get back to work. at the sound of his footsteps, you turn towards him and before he can say anything at all, you ask him the same question as atsushi. kunikida has a smiliar reaction and response to atsushi, which just adds to the curiosity of dazai's possible dairy problem.

"i don't pay attention to that idiot's diet anyway, nor do i care." he says matter-of-factly.

anyone could tell that kunikida was slightly interested, just by the way he was continuing to linger by your desk as you continued talking about it with atsushi. soon enough, tanizaki had joined the conversation; then ranpo and kenji, and soon everyone in the agency other than fukuzawa. everyone was huddled around your desk, sharing memories of dazai's lack of dairy consumption. it was then decided that this theory of dazai being lactose intolerant would be put to the test when dazai returned to the office.

ranpo had come up with the idea, it wasn't too elaborate but a simple plan that could trick even the likes of dazai into drinking a glass of milk. during the discussion of dazai's dietary habits, it was also brought to everyone's attention by kunikida that it seems dazai doesn't have a high spice tolerance either. with that in mind, the plan was for the agency to have a joint dinner tonight, with curry on the menu tonight; spicy curry to be exact. dazai always flirts with you in the office, so it was your job to distract him by indulging in his pick-up lines and such. once he takes a bite and realizes it's too spicy for him, he'd try to find water to alleviate the pain, but coincidentally there is no water in sight. because of this, he'd be forced to drink the glass of milk you hand him. of course, if this didn't work, for dessert you'd give him a cup of coffee with milk and sugar (he uses non-dairy creamer in his coffee anyway).

you and kyouka set up a table to put the bowls of curry on, while atsushi and kunikida began bringing in the curry. tanizaki, naomi, and ranpo were in charge of getting the desserts to really sell the image of a nice gathering. kenji and yosano were in charge of tinkering with the water pipes to close off any possibility of access to water. this task was treated with such care, as any mission brought into the agency would be. each and every one of you were interested in learning about this side of dazai; are you going the extra mile for such a minuscule detail of someone's life? yes, but will it be amusing to find out the truth? also yes.

soon enough, dazai is spotted out the window. the truth is about to be revealed, and you are all nervous but excited.

"remember guys, act natural! operation: dairy for dazai starts now!" you exclaim quietly.

you can hear everyone take a deep breath and begin "talking" amongst themselves as dazai walks in. he stops in his tracks as he eyes the table holding all the bowls of curry and widens his eyes in surprise.

"oh? what's this?" he asks, gesturing to the table.

"y/n suggested having dinner in the agency tonight, so we got some curry and desserts." atsushi explains.

"have a bowl, dazai-kun." you smile at him as you hand him the bowl of spicy curry.

"ah, you're too nice, my belladonna!" he exclaims and grabs the bowl.

so far so good, you think.

you can feel the tension in the room as everyone waits for dazai to take a bite. the conversations carry on amongst people, but no one was truly paying attention to what was being said. the gazes of each member of the agency shifted to dazai as he raised the spoon up to his mouth. you could hear the sound of everyone in the room holding their breaths, even kunikida was sweating.

once the spoon had been placed in his mouth, everyone froze in place. you and atsushi tried to pretend to not be paying much attention to dazai, but it was so hard not to when all of a sudden he stopped chewing. you both slowly turn your head towards him and see his eyes go wide once again. he hurries to the nearest trashcan and spits out the spoonful, quickly turning and looking for a cup of water on the table.

"w-what's wrong, dazai-san?" atsushi asks, also sweating.

"h-hot! spicy curry! atsushi-kun, i need water! please!" dazai exclaims.

you run to the table and pretend to look for a cup of water before grabbing the glass of milk and hurrying towards dazai.

"sorry dazai-kun, i couldn't find any water, but i heard milk helps with the pain!" you hold out the glass of milk.

it feels like time stops as dazai sits there, breathing shallows breaths in attempts to stop the fire in his mouth, and contemplating whether he wants to try his luck with continuing to gasp for air or drinking the milk. he hates suffering, after all. in his mind, all that matters at this moment is extinguishing the flames dancing on his tongue. he grabs the glass, just as planned, and drinks a couple big gulps. everyone is now turned to him, asking if he's okay.

"i'm...fine." he says between pants.

now it was only a matter of time. the dinner continued as normal, but dazai wasn't as social as usual. he sat down with you and atsushi as you continued to talk about different missions.

"oh yeah, dazai-kun, do you remember--" you turn to look at him but realize he's staring at the ground intently as sweat beads on his face, "dazai?"

he blinks once and tries regaining his composure as he looks up at you with his usual smile, "yes, belladonna?"

"are you feeling alright?" you ask with concern laced in your voice.

"of course i am!" dazai tries to reply cheerily, but his bright tone is cut off by a rumbling in his stomach that makes his face twist.

he tries replacing his expression with a smile again, but it looks more pained as another low rumble emits from his body. at this point, everyone in the office is stealing glances. he looks back at the ground as his eyes widen yet again, and only two words are uttered before he takes off running to the bathroom:

"oh shit."

everyone stares at the door, processing what just happened. it was so silent, the only sound you could hear was dazai's rapid footsteps echoing down the hall.

"i knew it." you smirk a bit to yourself.

but your feeling of victory is brief as the horrid smell invades your nostrils. your poor co-workers get assaulted by the same stench, and you all are forced to evacuate.

operation: dairy for dazai was a success, but at what cost?

------------------------------------------

BONUS: how chuuya found out about dazai's lactose intolerance

chuuya was the only person who knew of dazai's problem with dairy, but the way he found out was purely accidental and scarred him.

the event took place when they were 17, and they were both stopping for a drink at a local cafe after a mission. the mission wasn't too bad, but it was early in the morning and chuuya wanted coffee. dazai told him it would stunt his already lacking growth, so chuuya wasn't in the greatest mood; he never was around dazai.

"i wanna sit down so you can order for me!" dazai claps his hands together.

"hey! i don't wan-" chuuya begins to protest but dazai cuts him off while walking away.

"you know what i like!"

chuuya grumbles in annoyance as he heads to the counter and orders two drinks. in his fit of anger, he accidentally ordered two coffees with milk and sugar, but failed to notice as he brought the cups to the table dazai sat at. he narrows his eyes as he sets the cup down in front of dazai and sits across from him. chuuya stares out the window to try and tune out dazai when he hears dazai ask him something quietly.

"is there...milk in this?"

chuuya scoffs and replies, "what's wrong, can't handle a bit of milk?"

he was obviously joking, but the sound that emits from dazai's body in response makes him realize it was no joke. dazai quickly stands and runs to the bathroom while chuuya sits there in disbelief, but with the hope that the rest of the day won't be ruined because of it.

that was wishful thinking though, as they frequently had to stop at public restrooms on their way home and chuuya had to deal with the rancid odor that followed dazai as closely as his own shadow.

taglist: @justmycupoftea93 @loveliestmolly @darlingimawitch @b-i-t-t-i-e-s @browneyespinkhair @silverstar22x @stupidfrogfreak @anotakugardener @jhopesstickeredcarrier @joyfulartisanstudentlamp @spacedoutcoffeebeans @puddingowo66 @kaeyapng @beomluvrr @imobsessedwithskkanditshows

[rowyn-writes]

A Mother's Love Part Two

Warnings: Pregnancy, fluff, major angst, implications of depression

Pairings: Dean x Wife!Reader

Characters: Dean, Jack, Sam, Reader, Cas (Mentioned only)

Word count: 3k

You sat on the couch of your childhood home, staring blankly at the T.V. Your knees were pulled up to your chin as you had your arms wrapped around your legs. It had been three weeks since you left the bunker, and you felt empty inside.

Your mother sat beside you, a cup of tea and honey in her hand and a concerned look on her face. "Darling, you have to eat something. I know you haven't been feeling well, but you still need to stay healthy." You didn't respond to her as she set the cup of tea in your hands.

Everything felt numb. It was like you didn't feel any emotions at all. The world felt dull. Like all color had been stripped and it left you in darkness.

"Sweetheart, what happened?" She asked softly. Even though you had been with your parents for almost a month now, you had never fully discussed what happened with Dean.

"Mom, please-"

"No, Y/N." She put her foot down. "You call me one day, clearly upset saying that you and Jack were going to stay here for a while. You get here and you don't look like the daughter that I knew. You've changed."

You scoffed at your mother's words. "I'm getting a divorce, of course I've changed."

She sucked in a breath of air. "Y/N. What happened?" You gave your mother a brief rundown of what happened with you, Dean and Jack. "Oh, honey." She sympathized. "I am so sorry. You know that you and Jack are welcomed to stay as long as you like. I know your father is excited to have a grandchild."

Your heart skipped a beat as you looked up to your mother. "What?"

"Jack, of course." She explained. "Look at them. Your dad's so happy. It's about time you give us a grandson."

"Lord knows you couldn't count on Chris for that." You rolled your eyes. "He can't keep a girl to save his life." Your smile began to fade slightly as your stomach did flips. Your mom noticed your green complexion and ran to grab a trash can. It was nearly too late as you felt your dinner from last night coming back up. She held your hair back as you did so, calling for your dad to get a wet washcloth.

You felt a cold cloth across your forehead, cooling your body. "Mom!" Jack said worriedly. "Are you okay?.

"She's okay, kiddo." Your dad assured him. "She's just not feeling too well." He mumbled skeptically.

You sat back against the couch, holding the rag to your head. "Jack," Your mom called. "Why don't you and I go make some cookies?"

Jack smiled at the idea, looking to you for approval. "You don't have to ask me, sweetheart. Go have fun."

You mother dipped down to whisper something unintelligible in your dad's ear before going to the kitchen.

"Y/N," He shook his head. "Why didn't you tell us sooner?"

"Because I don't want it to be real." You muttered. "I don't want to think about the last thing that Dean said to me or the look on his face. I want to wake up and for this whole thing to be a dream. But I know it's not. I won't wake up next to him tomorrow and I don't get to tell him how much I love him." You chocked on a sob, covering you mouth with your hand so Jack wouldn't hear.

"Oh, my sweet girl." Your dad said softly, pulling you into his side. "I am so sorry, my darlin'." You rested your head on his shoulder as tears slipped down your cheeks. "That's not it, though. Is it? There's something else."

"Papa, I think I'm pregnant." You confessed. "I'm late and I've been sick all week."

"Have you taken a test yet?" He asked. You shook your head. "Okay, I'll tell you what. I'll go by the drug store and get a couple of tests, just to be sure, and I'll grab you some food on the way home. How does that sound?"

"Great." You said with a small smile. He kissed the top of your head before grabbing the keys and heading out of the house.

---

Five.

Five tests that had come back positive. Each one that you looked at made your heart sink more and more. "Oh god." You whimpered. "Damnit."

"What does it say, sweetie?" Your mother questioned from the other side of the door. You slowly opened it up and showed her the positive pregnancy test.

"Are they all positive?" You nodded.

"What am I gonna do?"

"I think you should call Dean-"

"No." You said firmly. "I'm not calling Dean. He made it very obvious that he didn't want anything to do with me anymore."

"Y/N," Your mother spoke firmly. "I'm not justifying what Dean said or did in the moment, however, he was just as hurt as you were because you were leaving with Jack and you didn't know how long you would be gone. I really think you should call him. I think he would want to know you're pregnant with his baby."

You sighed at her words. You knew she had a point. She was your mother, she's always right. "What if he doesn't care?" You whispered. "What if he hears my voice and hands up on me?"

"Then that's his loss, honey." She cooed. "The least you can do is try."

---

MEANWHILE, AT THE BUNKER;

"Dean." Sam shook his brother. "Dean. C'mon dude, wake up."

Dean groaned as his eyes peeled open. "What?" He grumbled.

"You've been sleeping in here all night." Sam said, crossing his arms. "You should probably get some rest in your own bed, or at the very least, the couch. And charge your phone while you're at it, it's dead."

Dean stretched add he looked at the empty whiskey bottle set on the table and the picture of your wedding day beside it. It had been a rough few weeks since you had left. "You know I can't go sleep in that damn bed." He growled.

"Dean, I offered to switch rooms with you-"

"I don't want to switch rooms!" He snapped. "I want my wife back."

Sam frowned as he looked at his brother. He looked awful. He hasn't shaven in weeks, his hair's a mess, and there were dark circles under his eyes.

"Why don't you call her, Dean?"

"Because, after what I said, she'll never take me back. I was too harsh on her. Plus my phone is broken."

"One, you have ten phones, and two, yeah, you were a complete ass." Sam agreed. "You should have seen her when she left here. I had never seen anyone so. . . Broken before. You know they sparkle she had in her eyes?" Dean nodded. "It was gone. Her entire face seemed dull, almost like she had aged ten years."

Dean put his head in his hands, feeling defeated. "What have I done?"

"I don't know, but you had better make it right."

---

"Still no answer?" Your father asked. You had called Dean three times now and still no answer.

"Nope. Not a sound."

"I'm sorry honey," Your mother sympathized, rubbing your back. It's that anything we can do?"

"Yeah," You nodded. "I need space. I need to spend more time with Jack before the baby comes. I just want to know what it's like to be a mother."

"Of course." Your dad agreed. "Take the keys to the cabin in Colorado. I know that's a lot of good memories there and no pesky neighbors to worry about "

"Thanks, dad." You smiled. "We'll be outta here soon."

"You don't have to leave in a rush, kiddo. You know that we love having you here."

"I know."

---

"Why are we going to your parents cabin in Colorado?" Jack asked curiously as he peered out the window.

"Uh," You bit your lip as you tried to come up with a suitable lie to tell Jack. You hated how much you were lying to Jack lately, but you knew that he wouldn't understand the things that you were going through. "I just wanted to show you the place and stay up there for a little while. It's nice and quiet, you'll love it. It's cold up there and it's snowy in the winter. I used to go sledding all the time when I was younger and then my parents would call me in for hot chocolate and a movie. We can do that together. How does that sound, Jack?"

"It sounds great, Mom!" He smiled goofily. Every time he called you 'Mom,' your heart melted. You loved that Jack felt so comfortable around you to call you his mother. You knew that you would never be able to replace Kelly, and you would never want to, but you did want to make him feel safe and loved. You wanted Jack to know what a mother's love feels like. Jack blamed himself for the death of his mother, and you understood his grief, but you had told him time and time again that it wasn't his fault. Kelly wanted to go through with the pregnancy and refused to listen to anyone else's opinions on the matter. You just wished he understood that.

You felt a tear roll down your cheek, quickly wiping it away. "What's wrong, Mom?" Jack questioned. "Is it about Dean?"

You glanced over at Jack in surprise. "Why would you say that?"

"Well, Sam and Dean aren't here, and Dean hasn't called you to check up on you since we left. I know that whenever you go on a hunt by yourself, Dean calls you everyday to make sure you're okay."

You sighed heavily as you looked at the road in front of you. "Dean and I are. . . Going through a tough time right now. That's why I wanted to get away for a while. And I didn't want to go by myself, so that's why I wanted you to come with me."

"Are we ever going back to the bunker?"

"I don't know. . . It's a difficult situation, Jack. Right now, I don't think that I will be going back home anytime soon. But if you want to go back, I'll take you back. I don't want to make you do anything you don't want to do."

"I want to stay with you." He said firmly. "But I also want you to be happy. You don't look happy anymore. You don't smile or laugh the way you used to. You sit on the couch watching reruns of Friends, and I've heard you crying at night. Sometimes I think you forget that I don't sleep very much."

You said nothing in response, knowing that Jack was right. You wanted to call Dean one more time, but you knew it was fruitless. He wasn't going to answer. But you did have Sam. When you finally arrived at the cabin, you sent Jack to unpack while you dialed Sam's number. After three rings, he finally picked up.

"Hello, Y/N? Are you okay? How's Jack?" He asked in one breath.

"Hey, Sammy. I'm fine, and so is Jack. I just wanted to call and make sure that you haven't gotten killed by anything."

"Nope, we're still alive." He gave a small chuckle. "How are you, Y/N, really? Don't lie to me, because I know when you're lying."

"I miss him." You sniffed. "Being away from him hurts me." Your voice cracked, forcing you to clear your throat. "We've been married for five years. And I know that to the average person that doesn't seem like a long time, but we're hunters, Sam. You know how hard it is to stay in a relationship in our line of work. I've been in love with him for half my life, and now, for us to be in this situation, it sucks, Sam. I can't think of any other word to describe it. It really fucking sucks."

Sam was quiet for a moment as he listened to you cry. "I'm sorry this is happening, Y/N. I never thought that this would happen to you and Dean. But I've known Dean my whole life, and I've known you since we were twenty, so I think that I'm entitled to make a judgement on this." You let out a small laugh. "You two have been in love longer than you've been together, but both of you have been to dumb to realize it. You argue like cats and dogs because you're so certain about what you believe in. You're both so passionate about things that you never let up. And now that you're finally together, you have been so happy. Dean has never felt this way about anyone that he's been with, male or female. He loves you so much, Y/N, that it kills him. You have both come too far to for things to end like this. I'm going to tell you the exact same thing I told Dean; fix this."

"I want to, Sammy, I just don't know how."

"Stop hiding, for one. You can't fix something when you're hundreds of miles away." You groaned as you felt a wave of nausea was over you. "Y/N?" You quickly made your way to the bathroom. "Y/N? What's going on? Are you okay?"

You leaned against the wall once you were done throwing up. "Yeah, yeah, Sam, I'm okay."

"What was that about, then?" Sam questioned. When you didn't answer, he began putting the pieces together himself. "You're pregnant."

"SHH!" You hissed. "Don't say that!"

"Why not? Because you don't want Dean to know?" He spoke coldly.

"Sam, please, don't say anything."

"How long have you known, Y/N? And how long do you plan on keeping this from Dean?"

You sighed as you pinched the bridge of your nose. "I've known for a couple of days, okay? And I don't know when or how I'm going to tell Dean. He made it very clear that he didn't want anything to do with me the last time we talked. Besides, I tried to call him and he didn't answer my calls, so don't try to pin me off as the bad guy here."

"When did you try to call him?" The hard edge in Sam's voice disappeared.

"Three days ago, when I found out I was pregnant."

You could hear Sam let out a small laugh. "Three days ago I came in the kitchen to find Dean passed out on the table, hung over as hell and holding on to the picture of your wedding day. And beside him was his broken phone. His main phone, which I'm assuming is the one that you called?"

"Yeah. . ." You said meekly.

"Hang up and call his second phone. Please, will you do that for me?"

"Yes," You nodded, even though you knew he couldn't see you.

"I love you, Y/N/N."

"I love you too, Sammy." You sighed as you hung up the phone. You were terrified to call Dean. You hadn't spoken to him since that night all those weeks ago. You were still hurt, and you knew that Dean was hurting as well, and all you wanted was to hear his voice. You took a deep breath as you dialed his second phone number.

It rang five times before going to voicemail, making your heart sink. Not a minute later, the number called back. "Hello?"

"Y/N." Dean's voice said gruffly. "Sam told me you were going to call."

"Did. . . Did he tell you anything else?" You asked.

"Just that I needed to talk to you. What's going on?"

"I miss you," You confessed. You needed to tell Dean everything, and that included telling him how you felt. "I hate the way things ended between us, and I know that it wasn't solely on you or me. But I love you, Dean, and I will never stop loving you. And I know it's unfair I left and this is how I'm trying to get you back; over the phone. I would much rather be doing this in person. But I love you, Dean, and I always will. No matter what you say or do, I love you."

You could hear Dean struggling to breathe correctly. "Where are you?"

"My parents cabin, wh-"

"I'll be tomorrow morning." And with that, he hung up.

---

You paced back and forth in the living room, biting your nails. Dean didn't say what time he was going to be here, but he just said that he would be here in the morning. You had stayed up all night thinking about him. About the way his hair fell into his face after a shower, and how he always smelled like whiskey and firewood. The way his eyes would crinkle at the edges whenever he laughed, really laughed. But your favorite thing was when you had just finished a hunt, and you would go to lie down in bed, Dean would pull you close to him and whisper how much he loves you.

A sharp knock at the door snapped you out of your trance. "Who is it, Mom?" Jack asked, peering around the corner.

"Why don't you come see, kiddo." You wiped your sweaty palms on your jeans before opening the door to reveal Sam and Dean. "Hi," You smiled. Sam was the first to come inside and hug you. He grinned as he pulled away, ruffling your hair.

"Why don't I take Jack into town for a little bit while you guys work this out?" He suggested.

"Yeah, yeah, that sounds good. Jack, go put on your shoes, you're going into town with Sam for a little while." Jack beamed at your works, hurriedly putting his shoes on a following Sam out the door.

"Hi," You said once more after Sam and Jack were gone. Dean didn't say a word as he hugged you tightly. You melted into his touch, feeling comfort in his embrace. The familiar smell of whiskey and firewood filled your nostrils. You closed your eyes to savor this moment. "I missed you."

"I missed you too."

.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

taglist:

@vicariouslythruspn @mimaria420 @fofisstilinski @daphnen21 @katwed @anunstablefangirl @desimarie12 @alderpine @rebeccaitsnotwhatyouthink @akshi8278

Also, yes, there will be a part 3

[all-about-seggs]

Unraveling Desires :

Rating - 18+, Mature

Pairing - Gojo Satoru x female reader

Word count - 1.4k

Warning's - Smut, vaginal sex, cunnilingus, fingering, Virgin!reader, Female reader, I wanted to add a bit of corruption kink but I don't think I did a good job. Satoru is being a gentle dom.

Your room was quite except for the wet smacking of Satoru's lips against yours. With just a few more seconds left before you start to feel breathless, he would notice for sure but won't stop, loving to push your limits as much as he can and today was no exception.

His hands kept roaming around your clothed thighs in soft circular motions as if to make you feel more at ease, though you both knew it was having the opposite effect. Usually you stopped him before his hands made any contact with your bare skin but you had already decided even before inviting him to your place, that you were ready to take the next step. It's quite the feat actually, how you controlled yourself all this time.

Every movement his big mascular hands made, every bob of his Adam's apple when you two had your lunch dates, every kiss from his soft pink lips was irresistible and undeniably sexy. And the worst part? He knew what he was doing to you and was ruthless in his ministrations.

" Hooooo~ ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) what are you thinking y/n chan?" he cooed, keeping his tone light and teasing, to make you blush.

You wanted to do a lot more than kissing from the start but the fact that you had zero experience along with your boyfriend's cocky nature made it difficult for you to openly admit your thirst for him.

"...... Hmmm y/n, you're not go stop me today?" Satoru's question brought you back to reality before your mind could continue with its fantasy.

This was it. He gave you the perfect chance to decide what would happen tonight. Regardless of his love for pushing your buttons he respected your decisions and would ask for you after every heavy makeout session, whether you wanted to continue or not.

The answer was clear to you this time,

" I don't want you to stop", you muttered, stifly looking him in the eye. A sultry look would've been better but it's hard to muster up the courage for that when you're face to face with Satoru's beautiful azure eyes. The blindfold he usually dons, long discarded on the floor.

Something about having his eyes on you makes you feel completely naked even with all the cloths you have on. He doesn't miss a single chance when it comes to making you squirm. A few seconds pass before he finally grabs the hem of your t-shirt,

" You wanna do this naked right?" Satoru asks again, smirking from ear to ear. He just wants to make you as desperate as possible, begging for his touch, to pump his already over inflated ego, as the self proclaimed honoured one, it's only natural his little sweetness would want to bare herself to him and only him .

He pulls the garment off as soon as you give a shy nod, throwing it on the floor, he swiftly worms his way to your bra while kissing up your neck. He takes your outfit apart piece after piece untill there is nothing left to hide. He props himself up on his knees to admire your naked body splayed out beneath him.

Its nothing short of embarrassing for you, to be stared at like this but you'd be a hypocrite if you said you didn't liked having all of your boyfriend's attention.

" What a pretty body you have my sweet, all untouched, now why don't you be a good girl and tell me all the dirty thoughts you think you've hidden from me, hmmm?", Lowering himself to rest his face on your chest he continues in a hushed voice,

"Oh and keep them unfiltered.... I'd rather your first time be to your liking....... Don't worry about being unreasonable, cuz I can make anything happen", there was arrogance in his tone, as always.

" I just wanted to do this with you, for a long time, and I feel like we've both waited enough so please....just touch me.." you said, desperation clear in your voice and Satoru finally gives in, moving towards your breast, he takes your left nipple in his mouth, licking the soft bud untill it hardens, his other hand roaming to your hips.

" Say, Y/n..... Have you touched your self before?", Pulling his mouth from your boob with a pop, he asks, leaving you a little stunned.

"Ngh- n-no.... I haven't", as soon as those words slip from your mouth his eyes light up, giving them an otherworldly glow.

"I see, so this is gonna be the first time you cum then....." His voice grows distant and soon he's in between your thighs. He gently parts your legs, staring intently at your core.

" No need to be embarrassed sugar, I'm gonna make you feel good", his reassuring words were oddly arousing, keeping both his hands on your inner thighs, he latches his mouth on your pussy giving your slit a long, smooth lick.

Your moans are inevitable at this point as he keeps his focus on your clit, altering between sucking on it and licking your tight virgin hole. He makes sure you feel all the slick gathering in your pussy as he slurps on it like a man starved and soon the only voices in the room are of your stifled moans and his obscene way you eating you out.

Moving one hand to your folds, he slides one slick covered finger into your tiny cunt, another new sensation along with the one his tongue is creating is too much to bear as you let out coarse moan,

Lifting his cum smeared face, Satoru's blue eyes stare at your face through his disheveled bangs, you look so cute, your pathetic attempts to bite back the sounds of pleasure, moist eyes and your face that looks like it's going to explode if he doesn't make you cum, it's all so pure. He can't help the sadism that's building up inside him, his need to tease you more growing with every second.

" Don't hold back y/n~ I want to hear how good I'm giving it to you and I want you to tell me when you cum okay?♡", his voice is so sweet you'd think he's talking to a toddler. His head dives back to your folds as soon as you uncover your mouth and the next thing you know, a throbbing sensation is taking hold your your nether region.

" Sa- Satoru.... Im fe- feeling it......", You choke out a few words of warning before he adds another finger in your hole, taking his long, thick fingers in and out untill you start to stretch by his ministrations.

You're first orgasm was overwhelming, making you clench your thighs and pussy around him, moving your hips against his face until you come down from your high.

You're panting with your eyes closed and mouth open as Satoru pulls himself up, wiping his face with the back of his hand he states down at you, looking all blissed out with such a lewd look on your face that nobody but him has ever seen. It makes his cock twitch with excitement.

" I hope this wasn't all you wanted, because we have a lot more to do~ "

You open your eyes to see your boyfriend already half naked in front of you, he smoothly takes off his pants and underwear, his hard cock laid out in front of you for the first time. You wanted to stare, hell, you are staring, it looks just as pretty as the rest of him, intimidating too because of its size.

" Are you ready y/n?, Because it's time I get my fill of you as well, so relax for me", kneeling in between your thighs again, he strokes himself a few more times before lining himself in front of your entrance.

You give a reassuring nod before he slowly eases himself into you with a low groan, the stretch is painful and long as he bottoms out. Seeing your face twisting in pain he stops and waits for you to adjust to his size.

" How are you doing my love?" He asks, his tone an octave lower, sounds even more tempting when he's speaking right into your ear,

"Yeah..... Its okay", you look up at him and he feels himself twitching inside you, he's also been very patient so as to not rush you. Never objecting when you asked him to stop whenever you had your makeout sessions. You trusted him with yourself, that's why it was easier to tell him your desires.

" Please make me feel good".

[moonlightflower21]

just like magic

a/n: angsty fluffy. normal raph. there may be mistakes and it may be hard to follow through lol. but i hope you enjoy ❤

"y/n!! wait, please wait!!" the call of raph desperately trying to reach you fell on deaf ears as you angrily walked into the public so he couldn't come close.

it was so hard to decipher what you were feeling. betrayal, anger, sadness, embarrassment, pain. sometimes it felt like you couldn't even catch a break. he had been acting so suspicious and you couldn't help but recall what your best friend had said earlier, that when a boyfriend stop texting and calling back they were sleeping around.

he couldn't.... could he?

that one girl, amber, from the chief vincent crew had been crushing on him forever. you learnt that raph and her had a small fling years ago, before he ever met you. but other than that, you didn't know much else other than the fact that she absolutely hated your guts. the feeling was mutual of course but she never failed to make any small digs at you whenever you were together.

so when she came out of his room wearing nothing but lingerie, it wasn't an understatement to say your heart felt it had been stomped on the floor. leo, mikey and donnie were all out with their significant others so they couldn't even provide any help or shed any light on why she was in your boyfriend room

the reason as to why you came around was because you thought of surprising him, considering you hadn't even seen him for the last two weeks. he seemed to vanish for hours on end and while you didn't want to jump to any conclusions, you just had to talk to him. but seeing her come out of his room that he let no one in felt like a punch to the gut.

"when will you ever learn? first loves outshine any other" amber cackled in your face, swaying her hips as she left the lair. you couldn't even speak scared you would start crying on the spot. and the last thing you wanted was to give her the satisfaction.

you entered the room but aside her horrible perfume stinking the air, raph was nowhere to be seen. hell his bed looked empty. untouched. and yet his window was open, so perhaps he escaped? the more reasonable part of you disagreed vehemently, he wouldn't do this shit. and you couldn't trust that woman, she was out to drive you both apart

but this wasn't excusable either. the air felt constricting here, walls falling in closer so you left. angry tears on the brink of falling, the excited evening you had planned obliterated in small pieces.

---

the small bench in the park was empty and you sat, trying to reel in those thoughts but they proved to be a challenge.

"y/n please listen to me, i can explain everything i swear" you rolled your eyes but stood up. hearing his part would at least put your mind at ease and those burning questions could finally be answered.

"you get one chance raphael. let's go to my place, i don't want other people listening in" you look into his pleading eyes, turning the corner and walking home with him eagerly following you close.

raph entered your room, thankful for the heat that flooded his system. he didn't realise how long he was outside and how cold he was until he bagn to shake slightly. he turned his attention to you as you shrugged odd your jacket, brows raised at him.

"no more secrets, raph. no more lies otherwise we're done" you snapped, crossing your arms over your chest. he nodded, ready to answer the oncoming slaught of questions that had been scorching holes in your chest.

"who is amber? and do you still have any feelings towards her??" your voice trembled a little at the end of that sentence, hoping her put your mind at ease. his jaw seem to clench slightly at the memory of her which brought some amusement.

"she's someone i thought i was in love wit'. 17 years old me didn't know shit at the time. after a while, i knew whatever we had was just infatuation. it was never gonna work out. she wanted a relationship while i was looking for something small. but that's in my past. i don't have any love towards her anymore. she was just a silly crush"

"she was your crush? doesn't seem like it" "she was. ya can't be mad at that because you've also crushed on guys before i came but that's a good thing! because they led us closer to each other and look at us" he holds your hand, his thumb gently rubbing over your knuckles which was something he usually did to reduce your stress. and against your will, you could feel those familiar butterflies invade your lower belly.

"but why was she in your room? looking very cosy in there, i might add" your jaw clenched tightly, glaring at the floor in order to contain your anger.

"she what?? y/n i promise i had no idea why amber was even in my room. i wasn't even there. in fact, i'm barely ever there most days" he rubbed the back of his neck, hesitating the last part.

"why?" your brow lifts and he sighs, grimacing.

"well... i... uh... got a job" he chuckles awkwardly, expecting you to burst in laughter. but you just seemed to have a confused look, intrigued at his comment.

"a job?" you ask and he nods, fidgeting with the end of his shorts.

"yeah... in construction. splinter thought it would be good anger management. i started doing it to also pay back for the necklace... that ya don't seem ta wear anymore" he narrowed his amber eyes around your neck and true to his word, you had taken it off. your hand touches your chest, feeling only the bare skin instead. the only reason you had taken it off was because he just kept being so secretive around you. and you didn't know who to trust.

"so that explains the extra muscles on your arms" you ponder and he laughs, flexing his bicep.

"they got us liftin heavy stuff" he rolls his shoulders, aching from last night. "i'm sorry for not saying anything about it. i didn't want to be laughed at" he chuckles but there's no humour in his voice, just nervousness which is rare for raph to ever have.

"you'd think i'd laugh at you?? i'm the last person to judge and i think it's a good thing for you. it's healthy to let your anger out in this way, i'm proud of you. but you have to stop with these secrets, they're only driving a wedge between us" your hand is gently placed on his knee which he appreciates, with you he never feels pressured to say things. you let him take his time which he's never found in other partners before.

"i know i just didn't want ta disappoint ya, i'm not a millionaire and i'm not the greatest looking guy either. i just wanted ya ta be happy at somethin-" "raph, you could never disappoint me. i don't care about money or fame, i just want you to be as serious about us, i just want to be there for you. but i can't do that if you keep pushing me away, hiding these things from me" you sigh your previous anger melting into sadness and relief.

"m'sorry princess, i do care about us. there's just things that i have trouble saying. but i promise i never mean to intentionally hurt ya" he cradles your hand, his gaze on the floor in deep thought. your head gingerly leans against his arms and his finger places comforting circles around your knuckles.

"where is yer friend? aren't ya supposed ta go out tonight?" raph remembered, looking around the room.

"yeah she's supposed to come soon but i haven't confirmed anything" you lean back on the bed watching his amber eyes narrow mischievously. in the way you grew to adore.

"so what i'm hearing is, we have time?" he smirked but you gently nudge his chest, shaking your head with an amused smile.

"i'm still annoyed at you" you chuckle when he smiles softly, his eyes shining under your lights. he leans closer to you, simply just wanting to be in your embrace.

"and i'll spend every moment making it up ta ya. let's just cuddle, i've missed ya"

[mimisempai]

I am here to ask you something special

Summary:

Sam wants to do things the right way. He visits an old friend to talk about his relationship with Bucky and ask for his blessing

or

5 times where Sam asks old Steve for his blessing and one time where he realizes he never needed it.

Notes:

Many people talk about Steve as if he were dead, but I imagine him living a peaceful life in a cottage with his sweetheart. Sam and Bucky still in contact with him, one way or another.

🌈 Happy Pride month ! 🌈

To celebrate, 1 day, 1 story.

Be ready for smiles, laugh, fluff, tooth rotthing fluff, positive vibes and a lot of love!

https://archiveofourown.org/works/32006143

2265 words - Rating G

Sam hesitated a bit before reaching for the small gate that led to the entrance of a small cottage surrounded by trees.

When he decided to open it, a voice said, "I thought you wouldn't come in."

Sam looked up and his gaze went to the source of the voice.

He moved forward a little, and hidden behind a flowering bush, he saw Steve, a book in his hand, sitting in a rocking chair.

"Sam, it's so good to see you! " he said with a smile that not even the years had been able to change.

He got up quietly and came over to meet Sam.

"Steve, you look great."

"No need to spare me, you can add I look great for my age. Come on in. So what brings you here my friend? We... uh I don't get many visitors, so I'm a little surprised."

Sam, who had noticed the slip of the tongue, didn't insist and followed him into a small, pleasantly arranged living room. They took seats in two armchairs.

"So Sam? How are you? How is it carrying the shield?"

"I'm fine, and as you know yourself, not always easy. But I think I'm doing okay."

Steve smiled softly and said, "You are, and I never doubted it, though I hear you don't care what Steve Rogers wants." he winked.

"I see Bucky couldn't help but open his mouth."

Steve chuckled, "He even made a point of saying it to my face, full of arrogance with his stubborn tone, 'You know what Steve, Sam's right, we don't care what you want.' and you were right. I'm glad you found your way, although as Bucky explained to me, we had no right to ask you to do something like that without knowing the consequences. I owe you an apology too Sam."

Sam, touched, didn't immediately know what to say. It moved him more than he thought to hear Steve's apology and the fact that apparently Bucky had defended him so passionately. It further confirmed why he had come to see his old friend today.

"So Sam, you still haven't told me, to what do I owe the pleasure of your visit?"

Sam fidgeted a little, he had thought it would be a formality, but now that he was here he realized it was harder than he had anticipated.

"Um...so here goes...you know Bucky and I are together...-" he began in a hesitant tone.

He was interrupted by a burst of laughter from Steve.

"I think I was the first to know. It was super early in the morning and I remember us...I was having breakfast when I got this facetime call from Bucky, talking all excited about a cookout, about 'Uncle Bucky' and in the midst of all this information, I managed to figure out that you two were a couple."

Steve looked at him with a fond smile.

Sam remembered what Steve was talking about like it was yesterday.

They had held a cookout on the harbor, and Bucky had come with a cake. Sam remembered how his nephews, family and friends welcomed him as if he were family. The way Bucky's face lit up when he saw Sam.

He especially remembered the end of the day, they were side by side in front of the lake and Sam had turned to Bucky and just said, "let's go home."

He had seen several emotions run over Bucky's face, shock, surprise, realization and finally a nameless joy.

He had whispered in a voice clouded with emotion, "Yes, let's go home."

And they had gone home, Sam's arm around Bucky's shoulders.

There had been no passionate kiss, no grand declarations in that moment, but like Bucky, Sam considered that from that day forward they were together.

"Sam?"

Steve's voice snapped him out of his reverie.

"Yes, excuse me."

"No worries Sam, believe me I understand you."

Sam coughed, then resumed, "Yeah, so I was saying, Bucky and I are together and things are going pretty well and-"

"According to Bucky, things are going more than pretty well." replied Steve with a cheeky smile. "He told me about the two of you taking a house together. If that's the case, then things are going better than well between you, right?" Steve asked him playfully.

It was true that, contrary to what the beginning of their relationship suggested, everything went smoothly.After fighting with each other and Sam choosing to become Captain America, they realized that the most important thing for them was to talk and listen to each other, and this allowed them to deflect most of the conflicts that would arise. Sam had learned to lean on Bucky and Bucky had learned to listen to Sam, and the balance between them was natural.

So living together had been a very obvious step.

He still remembered Bucky's joy when he had taken him in front of their new house, surprising him. But what had moved both men the most was the sign nailed to the door, obviously made by children's hands. It read: " Sam, Bucky and Alpine's house. "

The cohabitation was really going smoothly, it was easy to live with Bucky. They had adapted well to each other.

Sam smiled fondly, thinking back on all the little things that made up their daily routine.

Bucky was caring and Sam hadn't expected that. Bucky recorded every detail about him, all his quirks, his likes, everything-

"Sam? I lost you again."

You're going to think I'm an idiot by now," Sam replied with an embarrassed chuckle as he scratched the back of his head.

"I actually find it kind of refreshing, it's been so long for me, but I remember the thrill of the early months." said Steve with an understanding look.

"With her?" asked Sam, pointing to the wedding ring with his chin.

"Sort of." replied Steve with a mysterious smile.

"Always so evasive my friend." teased Sam.

"And so?" asked Steve.

"I see..." Sam didn't insist, "So I was saying, we're together and it's going very well. Bucky's even adjusted very well to Delacroix."

"Yes it seems to me he told me about working on a boat with your sister I believe?" asked Steve, looking interested.

"When he first came to Delacroix, he had brought me my new armor, and he stayed to help me repair the boat of our family business that Sarah, my sister, runs. And when he moved here permanently, he offered to help on his own. He fit in perfectly and the people of Delacroix respect him."

Sam thought of Carlos, who kept singing Bucky's praises. Bucky had taken a liking to the old man and often Sam would find them sharing a beer on the boat deck when he returned from a mission.

"You know Sam, it doesn't surprise me, Buck has always been a friendly and helpful guy. I'm glad to know that he's been able to get back to some semblance of a normal life despite the years Hydra took from him.I'm glad to know that he knows something other than fighting."

Sam saw emotion pass over Steve's face.

Of course he had seen that Bucky was fully acclimated to life in Delacroix and he was not unhappy about that. He knew that if he needed him, the White Wolf would be there in a heartbeat and ready to help, but he was glad to know that he had a life outside the battlefield.

"Yeah, sometimes I feel like he's lived in Delacroix longer than I have, and I was born there so that's saying something. So, yes, we live happily together in Delacroix, and he's kind of part of the family."

Steve chuckled, "Haha yes, Uncle Bucky. I really wish I could have seen his face when he was called that."

"You would have seen mine," Sam retorted, "I was the most surprised."

"Pleasantly surprised I hope." asked Steve, with a slight frown, gauging Sam.

"Yes yes, don't get on your high horse, Steve the mother hen. My nephews don't have much of a male presence in their lives except for me, that's why they adopted Bucky immediately, and needless to say, the reverse is true. Besides, he's become a legend among the younger generation, you understand, the bionic arm and all, even my wings can't compete."

Steve laughs as he imagines Bucky surrounded by kids.

"Wait, let me show you!"

Sam picked up his phone and after a few seconds, he showed Steve the screen.

The older man couldn't hold back a small tear at the picture of Bucky lifting children with his arm, while others laughed around him. But what touched him the most was Bucky's own laughter.

As Sam put his cell phone back in his pocket, Steve wiped away his tears as he apologized, "Well, that's just the way it is, as we get older we get more emotional, and to see my best friend this happy, makes me incredibly pleased, thank you for showing me this Sam."

"You're welcome."

Sam cleared his throat before continuing, "So here's the thing Steve, I came today, because Bucky is an extremely important person, hell he's the most important person in my life.  I never thought I would find someone who knows me and understands me so well and who I don't have to be strong with all the time.I told you he's part of my family, but I would like him to be part of it in a more official way, and since you're all the family he has left as I know he thinks of you as his brother, although sometimes you act more like his mother, so I-"

Steve, laughing at Sam's last sentence, interrupted him with a wave of his hand.

Once he calmed down, he began to speak, "Sam, I think I understand what you came for. And I want you to know that nothing makes me happier than to give you my blessing, but you didn't have to ask for it. From the first day Bucky told me about you two, you have had this blessing. You are an exceptional person, and I am extremely happy that my two best friends have found each other. Having found happiness with the person I love, I know how precious that is. Not everyone gets a second chance like we did... like I did. So be happy, both of you. You both deserve it."

He clasped Sam's hand and put his other hand over their joined hands, just like the day he had passed the shield to him.

Once again Sam's gaze was drawn to the ring on Steve's finger.

"You still don't want to tell me about her?" asked Sam.

Letting go of Sam's hand, Steve said simply, "No..." Steve paused for a moment before continuing, "This story belongs to him and me."

Sam abruptly raised his head, but seeing that Steve had resumed his mysterious air, he simply nodded.

"I understand. I'm glad you found happiness then."

He stood up and headed for the door, "Don't walk me out I know the way. Just wish me luck."

"You don't need luck. I'm sure he'll say yes." replied Steve with a wink.

"Goodbye Steve."

Then he closed the door behind him.

As he was about to open the gate, his phone vibrated.

He picked it up, there was a message, "On your left."

He looked over his left shoulder, and saw Steve in the darkness of the window, but he wasn't alone and had his arm around the shoulders of a familiar figure. Sam tried to make out the features of the smaller man, but couldn't. He simply smiled and went on his way.

**********

A few days later, at Delacroix, lying with his head in Bucky's lap, Sam watched him squirm to try to take a picture of his right hand with his phone.

He straightened up and asked, "What are you trying to do?"

"I want to send a picture to Steve, of this," Bucky said, waving the hand that had been sporting the engagement ring in front of Sam's nose.

Sam smiled with fondness, picked up the phone and took Bucky's hand. He captured a photo of their joined hands, the engagement ring in full view.

Then kissing Bucky's hand, he handed the phone back to him.

Bucky typed a few words and sent the message.

Several hundred miles from Delacroix, in a small cottage, reading, Steve picked up his phone, which had just vibrated.

On the screen were the words, "Buddy, you'll never guess who is going to tie himself down."

Followed by a photo of a hand adorned with what could only be an engagement ring, joined to another hand, undoubtedly Sam's.

"So that's it, Sam proposed?" said a voice behind Steve.

"And Bucky said yes." replied Steve as arms wrapped around him from behind and a kiss was placed on his head.

He set the phone down beside him and turned to put his hands around the waist of the man behind him.

He sighed softly in happiness as he said, "I hope they are as happy as we are Tony."

"I'm sure they will be, my love." the man whispered as he kissed his head again. Then he let go of him and came to sit next to Steve.

Tony leaned against Steve who put his arm around him.

Then Steve picked up his book and continued to read aloud, "Perfection is achieved, not when there is nothing more to add, but when there is nothing left to take away."

__________

Not beta'd I hope you enjoyed it 🥰

Quote at the end : Wind, Sand and Stars - Antoine de Saint-Exupéry

[hookedonapirate]

Trick or Treat

A/N: It feels so great to post again. I've been in a writing slump for several weeks now, so I wanted to write something short and sweet to get the writing juices flowing. Thank you @hollyethecurious for your ideas for the premise and @darkcolinodonorgasm for Killian’s costume!

Rated: Teen and up for mature language

“Well, that’s disturbing.” Emma grimaces at the zombie gnome with gnarly teeth, reaching out with dirt and blood covered hands like he's coming out of the ground to get them. Even though it's not real, the graphics are enough to give a kid nightmares.

 “That’s so cool, Mommy!”

 Well, any kid who’s not her seven-year-old son that is. Henry runs down the sidewalk, his oversized hat falling off his head. He’s a ball of energy most days, but tonight, he’s extra energetic, and he hasn’t even had any candy yet.

 “Kid, your hat!” She follows after him, picking up his hat from the winding walkway which is lined with jack-o'-lanterns on each side. But as she passes each one, she’s surprised when she realizes these aren’t just typical jack-o'-lanterns with a mouth, nose and eyes carved into them. No, these are intricately crafted jack-o'-lanterns. One is carved into a haunted house, one is a graveyard full of ghosts, another looks like a skull from afar, but up close, it appears to be carved into long stem mushrooms and grass. Her favorite is the pumpkin carving that mimics a scene from the Nightmare Before Christmas. 

 Like seriously, who has time to carve out all these pumpkins? And why weren’t the Jack-o'-lanterns on display as she had seen at the Night of 1,000 Jack-o'-lanterns at the Chicago Botanic Garden? Whoever carved these has some ridiculous artistic talent. They are also way too into Halloween, because their yard is all decked out. There are games set up on tables in the yard, skeletons and ghosts hanging from the trees and tombstone yard signs all over. 

 As she walks up the steps to the house, fake fog sweeps around her feet, the porch is covered in fake cobwebs with large spiders and the porch railing is lined with decorated jars, “potions”, skulls and other Halloween themed knickknacks. She laughs at the potion bottle labeled, “love potion.” When she reaches the door, which is wide open, a group of kids in cute costumes gathered around waiting for treats, she’s expecting the three looney witches from Hocus Pocus to emerge from the house. 

 When a man in a black top hat, tailcoat and a cane appears through the door with a bowl full of candy, she realizes how wrong she is. 

 Boy, is she wrong.

 Holy shit, he’s gorgeous. His skin looks ghostly white from the makeup on his face and he's wearing a brown curly mustache, but those vivid blue eyes are so very blue, even in the dark and under the hat he’s wearing. She’s afraid those eyes will set her on fire when he looks at her.

 “Trick or treat!” the children chorus. 

 Emma can’t take her eyes off the man as he excitedly hands out candy.

 “I love your costume, lassie,” he compliments a little girl who's wearing an Elsa costume.

 He has an accent? Holy hell.

 The little girl frowns, clearly not understanding what he meant by lassie. “I’m not a dog, I’m Elsa.”

 He chuckles, dropping a candy bar into her pumpkin bucket. “My apologies, Elsa. Please don’t blast me with ice.”

 “Thank you, mister,” she says cheerfully before scurrying down the steps to meet her parents at the end of the walkway. 

 “Trick or treat!”

 The man looks toward the small voice, seeing Henry approaching him. He grins big and wide, which makes him look much creepier than he already looks in his costume. Creepy, but sexy. “Well, hi there. Captain Hook, I presume?”

 Henry nods his head and opens his Halloween sack, using his plastic hook to hold one of the straps.

 “Very nice costume, lad. My favorite one so far.”

 “Thank you. I made it,” Emma boasts with a smile as she steps behind her son, placing the hat on his head. She’s not normally one to brag, but then again bragging doesn’t normally afford her the opportunity to talk to ridiculously handsome strangers.

 The man looks up, and when his eyes finally connect with hers, he completely steals her breath. She was wrong. His smoldering blue eyes don’t set her on fire, but they do make her melt.

 And his heavy stare makes her skin tingle.

 “You made this lovely costume?”

 She waves her hand nonchalantly. “It was easy. Just took a red, long-sleeved shirt, some ribbon and slapped some red felt and white feathers on a straw hat and voila.”

 “Very impressive, lass.” He glances at her shirt briefly before returning his eyes to hers. “Did you also make your costume?” he asks, his eyes dancing with mirth. He must have been referring to her red leather jacket and white t-shirt that reads, “This IS my Halloween costume.”

 Emma laughs. “No, I bought it on Amazon.” 

 “Wow, Mom, check this out! Full-size candy bars!” Henry shouts excitedly when the stranger deposits the candy bar into his sack.

 Emma tears her eyes from this man’s mesmerizing blue ones to see the full-size Snickers bar Henry’s holding out to show her. “Huh, people actually do give out full-size candy bars.” She looks up at the man. “I’m impressed. Let me guess, you also carved those pumpkins, too?” she asks, pointing to the pumpkins in his yard.

 He nods with a small smile. “I did. You’d be amazed by what I can do with these hands,” he says smugly.

 Emma wants to roll her eyes, but she can’t deny she very much wishes to find out exactly what he can do with those hands. Instead, she flashes a sarcastic smirk. “So who are you supposed to be, Jack the Ripper?” 

 He chuckles. “Not quite. I’m a gentleman from the Victorian Era. A devilishly handsome gentleman, may I add.”

 She cocks a brow, laughter bubbling in her throat. “If by a  devilishly handsome gentleman, you mean creepy.”

 He sets down the candy bowl and surprises her when he takes her hand in his and lowers his head, murmuring softly as he looks up at her. “The name’s Killian Jones. And it just so happens, I’m always a gentleman. Not just on Halloween.” His touch sears her skin, then he presses his lips to the back of her hand and it feels like electrical currents are surging through her. Her breath catches, and she’s worried he will notice. Judging by the smirk spreading across her skin, he definitely noticed.

 Emma turns her head, looking for her son, whom she spots in the yard playing games with the other kids, their parents supervising them. “I should get back to my son.”

 This man actually pouts as he releases her hand. And it’s freaking adorable. “I told you my name and yet you haven't told me yours?”

 She bites her bottom lip, contemplating whether she should or not. But then again, what’s the harm? It is a small town, so they’ll probably end up running into each other again at some point. “It’s Emma.”

 He grins, making her heart melt. “Nice to meet you, Emma.”

 “Likewise.” 

 He scratches behind his ear, which makes him look less creepy and even more adorable. “I’ve never seen you before. Are you new in town?”

 “I’m from Chicago.”

 “Well, love, welcome to Storybrooke.”

  Oh. Now he’s calling her love? Can this man get any sexier? Jesus Christ. “Thank you.” She gives him a shy smile and turns to head down the steps.

 “Wait. Before you go, I have a treat for you, too.” 

 She spins around, arching her brow. “Oh, that’s okay. Henry will share some of his candy with me.”

 He chuckles and shakes his head. “This treat is not for kids.”

 Emma gulps. “What kind of treat did you have in mind?” Something salty? Her mind definitely did not go into the gutter there. Okay, it totally did. 

 He heads inside, then returns not a moment later with a caramel apple. 

 “A caramel apple?” She almost sounds disappointed. But she’s definitely not.

 “Aye, but not just any caramel apple. It’s an adult caramel apple. So make sure you don’t share this with your lad.”

 She eyes it suspiciously. “It’s not laced with love potion, is it?”

 He chuckles and leans closer, whispering in her ear. “No. But it is laced with cannabis-infused butter.”

 Emma smirks as she takes the caramel apple. “Wow, you really go all out on Halloween, don’t you?”

 He shrugs. “You should come back around Christmas.”

 “Oh God, you’re not one of those people who goes completely crazy with the Christmas lights and the decorations and Santa and his reindeer on the roof, are you?”

 He shrugs again, donning a smirk. “Guess you’ll have to wait and find out.”

 “Is that an invitation?” Because she's definitely not thinking about inviting him to get high and engage in hot, sweaty sex with her. Not at all.  

 “Perhaps. Do you and your son enjoy hot cocoa and watching Christmas movies in front of a cozy fireplace?”

 She eyes the caramel apple and then glances up at him. “Does Santa enjoy adult cookies with his milk?”

 His grin widens, making her heartbeat skyrocket out of her chest. “Aye, then it’s a date.”

 Emma rolls her eyes, a smile tugging at her lips. “Not a date.” She doesn’t like the idea of waiting until Christmas to see him again, though.

 His face clouds with guilt. Sorry, love, I just didn't see a wedding ring on your finger so I assumed-”

 “I'm not married,” she clarifies, her cheeks flushing because of the fact that he was curious enough to check her hand for a ring. “Nor do I have a boyfriend. I'm single.” Very single. She's never been so glad to be single before.

 He sighs in relief, which gives her the courage to say what's on her mind and to thankfully change the subject.

 “You know, adult cookies aren’t just for Christmas...”

 He cocks his brow, and good Lord, she really needs him to stop doing that, because it’s doing things to her breathing and her heart. “No? What other special occasions are they for?”

 She shrugs. “Like a Saturday night, say next week when my parents are taking Henry for the weekend.”

 His eyes flash with something she can only describe as excitement. Or anticipation, maybe? “But still not a date, right?”

 She shakes her head. “Nope, just two adults enjoying their adult cookies.” 

 He laughs. “Okay, I’ll bring the apple cider.”

 “Sounds like a date,” she says accidentally when she had meant to say Sounds like a plan. But she doesn't even bother correcting herself as her cheeks warm with blush. She backs away and manages to rip her eyes from him to turn around and head down the steps. She finds Henry playing a game with the kids and takes his hand, telling him it’s getting late. He leaves with a groan but doesn't make a fuss. 

 As they leave the yard, Emma turns around, getting one last glimpse of the devilishly handsome Victorian gentleman. He winks and smiles at her, making her heart stutter, and she blushes and walks away as she leaves with her son.

  She had doubts when she moved to this small town to start over, but the warm feeling in her chest is telling her perhaps coming to Storybrooke wasn't a bad idea after all.

Tagging a few people who might be interested in reading:

@kmomof4 @teamhook @ilovemesomekillianjones @onceuponaprincessworld @artistic-writer @nikkiemms @snowbellewells @donteattheappleshook @itsfabianadocarmo​ @searchingwardrobes​ @melly326​

[itsadamcole]

graduation day pt.2

fem!reader x finn balor

It’s been two months since reader graduated college. Her and Finn’s new relationship is going strong. She’s applied for a position as teacher’s assistant at the college she graduated from so she has a reason to continue living nearby to be with Finn. The two decide to keep their relationship on the down low since he is her former professor. She finds out that it’s not easy to keep a relationship on the down low, especially when she finds out the teacher she is assisting is the woman that has had a thing for Finn for the longest time .... “you are so fucking hot when you’re jealous”

word count: 3.6k+

warnings: a former teacher/former student relationship, angst, smut

— here’s part 2 of “graduation day” that probably no one wanted. enjoy —

masterlist || part 1 | part 3 | part 4 | part 5 ||request an imagine here

~ 18+ content below - read at your own risk ~

You’re getting ready for your first day of work when your phone begins to ring. You see that “finn ♡” has popped up. You answer right away.

“Look who it is,” you say, smiling as you brush out your Y/H/C hair before tying the natural waves up in a high ponytail. “I was just thinking about you.”

Your new boyfriend laughs over the phone and says, “I can only imagine what was goin’ through that pretty little head of yours. Anyway, have ya found out who ya are assigned to assist?”

As Finn talks through the phone, you put on your outfit for the day. When he’s done speaking, you say, “Not yet. I report to the English department head.” I did request to be put in the English department so there’s more of a chance that I’ll be put with you.”

The outfit you’re wearing today consists of a simple short sleeved black dress with converse black and white sneakers.

Finn says, “Well, stop my my office when ya get assigned. Maybe I can tell ya a little about the teacher ya were assigned to so ya know what to expect.”

You add some light makeup to your look as you say, “I will. I have to get to the school so I’ll see you in a bit.”

“Alright,” Finn says. “See ya in a bit.”

The two of you say your goodbyes. You gather your things, including phone, wallet, and little backpack in case you’re assigned to grade something.

It’s 7:30 in the morning. You woke up an hour ago to shower and get dressed. You don’t have to be at school until eight but you want to grab coffee from Dunkin.

You get into your car, throwing your things in the back.

The past two months have been anything but ordinary for you. Since graduation day, you and Finn have been attached at the hip. You're always at his place or he's over at yours. The new relationship between the two of you has needed some getting used to.

He convinced you to stay nearby by getting a job as teacher's assistant. You're getting paid a decent amount too because it's a private college. It was this or go home to New York, which would be over a thousand miles away. You were not interested in leaving Finn this soon. So you applied for the job.

Once you got hired, Finn told you that he wanted to keep the new romance between the two of you a secret. You immediately agreed. Finn's well known among the teachers and students and you had some friends in the grade below you. It wouldn't look good if it came out that you and Finn were in a relationship.

He's your former professor. You're his former student. You only graduated almost three months ago.

There's also an almost seventeen year age difference between you and Finn. You turn 23 in a few months and Finn is 39. Neither you or Finn care about the age gap. It just wouldn't look very good for either of you if the relationship between the two of you was public.

You think about the past two almost three months in the short ride to Dunkin. You go through drive-thru to get your coffee and two donuts.

A medium mocha iced coffee with some cream, sugar, and some extra mocha to make it a little more sweet. You get two glazed donuts to eat on the way to school.

You and Finn both embraced the change of relationship. You went from teacher and student to lovers. Some would find it weird, especially with the age gap, but it never bothered you or him. Finn definitely still moves like he’s in his 20s and not about to hit is 40s.

When you arrive at school, you remember the last time you were here. You pulled up almost three months ago to confess your feelings to your teacher before proceeding to sleep with him in his office. It was the best sex of your life. The few times you've had sex since have been good, but nothing compared to what happened in the office on graduation day.

You pull into a spot in the teacher's parking lot. You park in the back of the lot. Once parked, you reach back and grab your things out of the backseat before getting out of the car. You secure the backpack on your shoulders before walking toward the English building, half drank iced coffee in hand.

The campus has teachers and students roaming around. It's almost eight in the morning. You're sure a few classes have begun by now.

You take the elevator to the fourth floor, walking down the hallway. You pass Finn's office, which is only a few doors down from the head of the English department.

Once you're outside the department head's door, you knock four times then wait.

An older man, probably late 50s or early 60s, answers the door. He's dressed very professional.

"Ah, Miss L/N," he says. "I've been expecting you. Please, come in."

You give him a kind smile before walking into the larger office. You're not surprised it's a big office. He is the department head.

The name plate on his door said "Dr. Dennis Hart PhD. Head of English Department". You sit across from Dr. Hart at his desk.

Dr. Hart says, "It's always wonderful to see former students getting a job here at the school. You did phenomenal in your English classes over the last four years so this department is lucky to have you."

You give a little laugh and say, "I'm just giving back to the school that gave me an amazing college experience. It's good to be back."

The older man smiles and says, "Now. The teacher I've assigned you to is Miss Veronica Rodriguez. She's a wonderful teacher and has been teaching here for five years. She teaches 407 English to seniors and her classroom is right below us, next to Mr. Balor's classroom. I saw you had him last year for English."

You nod and say, "I did. How is Mr. Balor? He was one of my favorite teachers and I never got to say goodbye and thank you to him."

When you and Finn agreed to keep your relationship on the down low, you both also agreed to act like you haven't seen each other since graduation day to throw off any suspicions.

Dr. Hart says, "He's been good. Very excited to be coming back for his tenth year of teaching."

"Ten years, wow," you say, almost shocked. Almost. "That's a long time. I didn't even think he was old enough to be teaching ten years."

The older gentlemen laughs and says, "He's older than you probably thought. Alright, class begins in about fifteen minutes so head on down and introduce yourself to Miss Rodriguez before class begins."

You nod and thank Dr. Hart before leaving the room. You walk down the hallway, checking to make sure no one is behind you before you slip into Finn's now open office. He sits at his desk.

"Hey," Finn says, facial expression brightening when he sees you. "How'd it go? Who ya assisting for the semester?"

You sit across from Finn at his desk and say, "Veronica Rodriguez. You know anything about her?"

Finn blinks at you before he says, "She's been up my butt for years. She's had a thing for me since she started teaching here and it's not a secret either. It's also not a secret that I've been rejecting her over and over again. She's a good teacher. She just needs to leave me alone."

You raise your eyebrows and say, "Wow. Well, don't worry. I'll do everything I can to keep her away from you."

He smiles and you look at the time. Ten minutes before class. You stand up and say, "Well, I've got to go to class. Are we meeting up for lunch here?"

Finn nods and says, "Of course. I'll see ya then."

You smile and lean over the desk, pressing a very light kiss to Finn's lips before leaving the room.

You head downstairs, walking to the classroom.

When you reach your destination, you knock on the door before opening it.

Miss Rodriguez is a younger woman. She's probably early or mid 30s and she's beautiful.

She looks at you and says, "You must be Y/N L/N. Dennis told me I'd be getting a teacher's assistant this semester and he told me you were a former student."

You nod and say, "That's me, and yes I am. I graduated in May." It's now mid-August.

Miss Rodriguez says, "Well, it's nice to meet you. You can call me Veronica or Ver, whichever you like. You don't need to be formal with me since we're co-workers."

You give her a nice smile. She seems like a very nice person. She tells you the schedule of her classes. Two classes on Monday and Thursdays. One class on Tuesdays, three on Wednesdays, none on Friday, and a late night class on Saturday. The only very early classes are on Monday and Thursday at 8:20 in the morning.

As students start trickling in, Veronica says, "I teach seniors who aren't very awake this early. This can be a little tricky sometimes but you'll get the hang of it. When I'm out sick or visiting family, I'd like you to come in and just assign some work then you can dismiss the class."

You nod.

Right as Veronica begins class, you look over at the doorway to see Finn standing there. You try not to have a reaction as Veronica notices. "Mr. Balor," she says. "Nice to see you. How was your summer?"

Finn says, "Eventful." You have to cover your smile. "How was your summer, Ver."

"A little less eventful," she says. "I stayed in most of the time, reading books. Um, why didn't you return my calls?"

You raise your eyebrows a bit and Finn glances at you before he says, "Like I said, my summer was very eventful. I apologize."

Veronica says, "Well maybe we can just skip over the phone calls and you can take me out to dinner."

Jealousy hits you like a truck. You want to say something but you know you can't. All you can do is bite your lip to stay quiet.

Finn gives a breathy laugh and he says, "After class we'll talk. Oh, and Y/N?" You look at him. "Nice to see that ya keep gnawing on that lip of yours. I'd stop doing that before ya cut it open."

He said that to you on graduation day. Your face heats up a little bit and let your lip snap back into place.

The door to the classroom closes and class begins.

***

After class ends, you make your way up to Finn's office. He's still in class so you sit in the spiny chair behind his desk.

Several minutes pass before you hear his voice outside. Not only his voice but Veronica's too. You hide under Finn's desk as the two walk into the room.

"... didn't tell me no in front of my students," Veronica is saying. "I'm thankful for that."

Finn says, "I've told ya no many times. I'm not interested in ya, Ver. You're a nice woman, and I'd even say attractive, but I'm not interested."

Veronica is quiet before she says, "Is it because of a wife? Or a girlfriend? Because I don't care about that, Finny. You know this"

"Get out of my office, Ver," Finn sighs, clearly annoyed. "Now."

You hear someone leave and peek out to see only Finn in the room. He looks over and sees you peeking out from over the desk.

He says, "Ya can come out, Y/N."

Slowly, you make your way out from under the desk and walk up to Finn. "I don't like how she can openly flirt with you," you say, pouting.

Finn's hands intertwine with yours and he says, "I'm all yours, my princess."

You pout some more and say, "It's not fair, Finn."

He says, "Relax, Y/N. I have no interest in her whatsoever. It's only you." He presses light kisses to your cheek and you look at Finn. His light kisses make their way to your neck, making you sigh.

"We are not doing this in your office again," you gasp as Finn grips your thighs right under your butt.

He smiles against your neck and says, “I never said we would, love.”

You giggle and say, “Come by my place when you get off work and we can do that there.”

Finn says, “I’ll definitely be there at four then.” You smile and nod before pecking his lips.

“I should head down to the classroom to make sure everything’s okay,” you say. “I’ll come back at lunch.”

He nods and says, “I’ll see ya in a few hours. Maybe I’ll come check on ya to make sure ya are okay.”

You smile and say, “If you hear yelling coming from my classroom then you should come running because I might be about to kill Veronica.”

Finn laughs and says, “Don’t kill her, Y/N. Please.”

You peck Finn’s lips before leaving the classroom.

Veronica dumps a little work for you to do. Just to make sure that everyone did the in-class assignment and to mark people who didn’t.

Noon hits and you go to the cafeteria to grab your lunch. You are in line when someone comes up behind you. You glance behind you to see Finn.

“Y/N,” he says. “Good to see ya again. How was your summer?”

You nod and say, “Good. Very eventful. How was yours, Mr. Balor?”

Finn says, “Also eventful. How about ya come by my office and have lunch with me so we can catch up?”

As you grab your lunch, you nod and say, “That sounds good.”

Finn laughs softly as the two of you grab your lunch. You pay and Finn pays before the two of you head to the office.

You walk into the office and Finn closes the door behind you. You sigh and sit at Finn’s desk. You begin to eat and Finn says, “I can’t wait for this day to be over.”

“I agree,” you say, swallowing the bite of your veggie burger.

The door opens and Veronica walks in. She says, “We usually have lunch together, Finny.” She sounds like a child and it annoys you.

Finn has a look on his face and he says, “We had lunch together one time, Ver.”

Veronica says, “It’s a little inappropriate to have lunch with a former student.”

“We’re catching up,” Finn says. “And she works in the department now. She’s a co-worker now.”

You look back at Veronica and you say, “You know what’s actually inappropriate? Begging someone to go out with you when said someone isn’t interested.”

Finn’s eyes widen and Veronica says, “Excuse me. That’s no way to speak to me. I can have your job.”

You smirk and say, “Go ahead. Try to take my job, but imagine what would happen if I went to your superior and told them that you harass Mr. Balor here.”

Veronica says, “Dr. Hart spoke so highly of you and you are not what I expected.”

“Yeah, well, I can tell that Mr. Balor is tired of your shit and he’s too nice to say anything about it so I will,” you say, turning in your seat to face Veronica. “I’m telling you now because he won’t. Back off of him.”

She looks taken aback by my comment. Her jaw is almost to the floor and Finn’s hiding a smile behind his hands.

Veronica says, “Keep speaking to me in that matter and I’ll make your life hell for the semester.”

A comeback immediately comes into your head as you say, “It’s already hell because I’m assigned to you.”

Veronica has a pissed off look on her face and she says, “Whatever.” She leaves the office and you look at Finn. He’s looking right at you.

“Ya are so fucking hot when you’re jealous and telling someone off,” he says.

You giggle and say, “Relax Finny Boy. A few more hours then you can do whatever you want to me.”

“Oh, I plan on doing whatever I want to ya,” he says, smirking at me.

***

You get back to your apartment at 3:30. Finn won’t be here for a half hour so you decide to get into something a little sexier than this plain black dress.

You put on a white lacy bodysuit. The whole thing is a little bit see through and the neck dips down low, exposing your cleavage. You keep your hair up and lay across the bed, laying on your side and facing the door.

Finn has a key. You gave him the extra key you had so he can walk into the apartment whenever he wants to. He’s only scared you once and he learned his lesson.

At four on the dot, the front door to your apartment opens and you hear Finn call, “Y/N?”

“Bedroom,” you call back.

The door is open and several seconds later, Finn appears in the doorway. His neatly tied tie now hangs draped over his neck and the first few buttons on his shirt are now unbuttoned.

His eyes darken with lust when he sees what you’re wearing.

“Like something you see, Finn?” you tease.

He nods and he keeps staring at you. You get off the bed and you walk up to Finn.

You hook your fingers in the belt hooks of Finn’s pants and look up at him. You say, “You’re mine, Finn. All mine.”

Finn echos, “All yours, my love.”

You smirk and say, “Good. Now fuck me until I can’t walk.”

That’s all Finn needs to hear before he picks you up by your thighs and walks you over to the bed. His lips are on your neck as he walks over to your bed. You gasp and giggle.

He drops you on your back on the bed and kicks off his shoes while starting to unbutton his pants.

You bite your lip gently as Finn undresses himself in front of you. Your eyes trace every muscle on his body.

Finn’s down to his boxers when he crawls on top of you, hovering over you between your legs. His lips crash to yours and they move harshly. You move your hips so your crotch rubs against Finn’s bulge. He lets out a low groan into the kiss then pins your hips to the bed. “I don’t think so, love,” he says, pulling away from the rough kiss. Ya told me to fuck ya until ya can’t walk so no teasing.”

You pout as Finn gets on his knees between your legs. His fingers hook onto the straps of your lingerie and he pulls the piece down until your naked as the day you were born.

Finn smirks as he admires your body. His hands roam a bit and you smile, watching his hands. They dip below your waist and his fingers run through your folds. You gasp as Finn pushes two fingers into you.

“Oh, Finn,” you sigh. He moves his fingers hard into you, scissoring you open. Your gasps and moans fill the room. You grab onto the silky bedsheets.

Finn move his fingers in and out of you roughly and quickly for a few moments before he pulls them out. You whine and look at Finn.

“Patience, my love,” he says, pulling off his boxers so his erect member is free. You reach out for it and Finn pins your wrists to the bed.

Finn leans down and says in your ear, “Tonight’s about ya, love. I’m gonna make sure ya know that I belong to ya and ya only.”

As soon as he’s done talking, he pushes himself into you. You moan softly and you put your hand on Finn’s biceps. As he begins to thrust into you, you dig your fingers into Finn’s arm.

Finn’s hands are on either side of your head, propping himself up. Your legs are wrapped securely around Finn’s waist as he moves hard and deep into you. His forehead rests on yours.

He moves roughly but almost in a careful way. He’s never moved like this before.

You slide your hands to Finn’s cheeks as he moves. You kiss his lips slowly, moaning as his thrusts get faster.

After a second, you roll and straddle Finn’s waist. You lower yourself onto his member and move your hips. His hands are on your waist, helping you move your hips.

“I’m yours,” Finn moans. “All yours, Y/N.”

You echo, “All mine.” You ride Finn like you never have before. You move like he moved. Roughly but carefully.

Finn sighs, “Come with me, princess.”

You nod and Finn counts down from three. Both of you come together, like the first time the two of you had sex in Finn’s office. You moan and cry out as you release around Finn. He groans as he releases his seed into you.

You roll off Finn and lay beside Finn.

As you both lay on the bed beside each other, you say, “That felt different but a good different.”

He laughs softly and says, “It did. It felt really good. I loved it.”

“And I love you,” you suddenly blurt out. You quickly cover your mouth and look at Finn.

The Irishman smiles and he leans over, kissing your neck softly. He mumbles by your ear, “I love ya too.”

[cherry-gemz]

The City by The Bay: Part II

Summary: Fates push you and a handsome and known stranger into each other's paths. His chilvary and good looks make you take a leap into his world and more.

Chapter Summary: You and Keanu get to know each other better.

Word Count: 2100 +/-

Pairing: Keanu Reeves x Y/N (F!Reader)

Rating: PG, fluff

A/N: First time taking a try on a Keanu fic, be nice, please! This little ficlet will have more chapters, hope you enjoy.

Who might be interested: @whiskeyslullabye​ @marissat1998 @aestheticallywinchester​ @fookingbitch​

Last chapter recap:

"Yeah...just around the corner. Did you...did you want to hang out for a bit? I mean, I didn't know if you were headed somewhere before I spilled your drink. What am I thinking? Of course you were off somewhere…"

"Are you always like this?" You giggle as you turn to head to the hall. 

"Like what?" 

"Nevermind, I'll be right back," you reply coyly. "And...I didn't have any plans today...I'd love to hang out."

"Really? Cool," Keanu responds and a grin appears on his face. 

"Yeah, I can't stay very long, however. I have a meeting with a client for lunch," you reply and he looks deflated. 

"Yeah, okay...well..hmmm," he says lost in thought. 

You feel stupid, you can't believe he wants to hang out with you and you're choosing work. You're really kicking yourself for even mentioning it. This opportunity will never happen again. 

"Well, I tell you what," he pipes. "I still owe you a cup of coffee. I happen to make the most amazing cappuccino. How about I start off with that?"

"Sure, that sounds lovely," you smile and his expression changes in a light-heartedness. 

"Great. Great, Y/N, head over to the kitchen after you change your shirt and we can get to know one another better."

You beam and head to the immaculate restroom. It’s very contemporary and the natural light from the ceiling windows are pretty to look at. As you unbutton your blouse you look at yourself in the mirror: you have a goofy grin and you can’t believe in you’re in Keanu’s house. Let alone, changing your shirt and going to hang out with him a bit. This is all surreal. 

You grasp his shirt and give it a sniff, clean. And you quickly put it over your head and leave the room with your blouse and book in your hand. As you turn the corner, you see him fiddling about and admire the open floor planned kitchen. You run your hand across the white, granite counters as he ushers you to have a seat at one of the barstools where you place your bag, the book he offered, and blouse down.

He claps his hands and rubs them as a cheshire cat grin appears on his face. 

"Okay, be ready to be blown away at these magic hands," he waggles his brows and holds out his large hands as you stifle a giggle. 

You'd watch interviews of him and he always seemed so genuine, and while he still does, there's a more childlike, goofiness that melts your heart a little more. You try not fall so quickly, but he really is quite loveable and easy to be around. Much different from the men you're accustomed to in the city. Their grittiness and quick paced talk tends to exhaust you. You're more in your element with one on one, in an intimate setting like today. It's ideal. 

Keanu grins and turns steadfast to the counter by the fridge and beelines to the espresso machine. He grabs a new bottle of water from the upper cabinets and places it in the boiler of the machine. You sit taller and try to peer over. You're never really that fancy with your coffee and it's usually due to the nature of your work and how quickly you need that caffeine fix, but you appreciate the art and look forward to his recipe. 

He continues his task at hand and opens a canister that's unmarked and pours two shots of ground espresso into the portafilter. He turns to you, to make sure you're watching as he plays along as if he's a magician and you're watching his act. 

"Secret recipe," he beams.

"What is it?" You ask inquisitively. 

He holds up his index finger and shakes it, "Na uh. If I gave that away, we could no longer be friends."

"Oh, we're friends are we?" You flirt and he blushes. You got him to blush!

He holds out the tamper he pulled out of the side drawer and presses the coffee three times to ensure it's packed tightly. 

He then places the portafilter into the espresso machine's group head and locks it in place by turning it to the right.

He continues his stride and places the tiny, white cup under the head for about 30 seconds. 

"Voilá!" He exclaims and you clap. He grabs a carton of cream from the fridge and you give him a puzzling look. Even as a chef, you're quite aware of the complexities of cream, so you're curious if this is part of the plan. He pours the cream into a small metal pitcher and inserts the steam wand. 

"Ah! Almost forgot…" he smacks his forehead with his free hand and goes to the cupboard and pulls out a jar. You notice it's sugar and he pinches a good handful in the metal pitcher and continues.

As the milk foams, he starts to pour it atop the cappuccino and walks over to give you the cup. 

"Mmmm, smells amazing. Thank you," you graciously accept the cup and take a sip. An explosion of the dark, roasted bean excited your taste buds. It's most likely hands down the best you've had. 

"Omigosh, Keanu. This is beyond good. I don't think I can ever go back to normal coffee again!" 

"Aw shucks, you'll give me a complex now," he teases. 

"Well if you ever decide to quit acting, I say you'd make a hell of a living doing that. Why, my bookstore would have lines out the door to see Keanu Reeves make them a cappuccino!"

He laughs heartily, "That would be a sight wouldn't it? Ah that's fantastic." 

You bring the cup to your nose as you try to make out the ingredients. You can tell there's a hint of spice and earth, and you take a guess of what he has mixed with the grounds. 

"Is there cocoa powder?" You look directly at him and he bites his lip.

"What are you doing?" He asks and shakes his index finger at you playfully and walks over to you. 

"Trying to figure out this recipe. You don't go tell a chef that it's a secret and expect them to not figure it out. I saw you toss in some sugar for the cream. And even noticed you use cream instead of milk. But I think it's cocoa...maybe even a hint of cinnamon?"

"What are you? Some super chef-dectective?" 

He dabs the frothy cream from your cup and places it on the tip of your nose, making you giggle. He licks his finger off and gives a sly smile.

"Maybe I have a profitable future ahead of me?" You lightly rub off the cream and gaze into his eyes.

"I think so Y/N, I think so." He shyly turns his eyes away and taps the side of the cup as if he's pondering a thought.

"So tell me," you gain confidence in speaking with him. "If you can make such a delicious cappuccino like this one, why were you at Saint Frank's?"

"Hah," he replies as he turns to start his own cup. "Flattery will get you everywhere."

You smile in-between another sip and notice he's flirting back.

"Well?" 

You prod and arch your brow as he leans his back against the counter. His black  shirt hugs his biceps as he crosses his arms, and the blue jeans he pairs it with fit him perfectly. His medium length hair seems to always get in his face, but it's endearing and he swipes away some strands. He's handsome without any effort and you slightly blush as your mind wanders about how his lips would feel against yours. 

"Honestly, I went out for a ride and needed to clear my head. I found myself just being pulled in that general direction and decided I needed a cup of joe," he says as he pours the cream for himself. 

"I guess it was you pulling me in or something,” he adds.

"So then what, it's like fate that we happened to be at the same place at that exact moment? And you happened to bump into me and make me spill my drink, therefore resulting in me jumping on your motorcycle with you. And then visit the home of a mega movie star and try the most fantastic cappuccino?" You laugh and he tilts his head earnestly. 

"What, you don't believe in fate, Y/N?"

"Not exactly," you reply. 

"Why not?" He walks over and sits next to you on the other barstool. 

"I mean, if it wasn't me, it'd be some other woman you'd be inviting over instead."

"No…" he replies as he takes a sip of his drink. "No, I don't think I would."

You both sit in silence for a minute, you sigh and then turn to look outside at the view. 

"I'm sorry, Y/N if I've seen to offend you. I can drive you back if you'd wish…" his voice softens and you can tell you hurt him a little. 

"What? No, Keanu. I'm...I'm sorry," you place your hand on his. His knuckles are worn and rough. He looks down at your hand and a small smile appears. 

"I...I want to be here, really I do. I guess I'm trying to make sense of it all. You're Keanu Reeves. And I'm just me. Why do you want to know me for?"

“Why wouldn’t I want to get to know you, Y/N? I am very glad we met. You're funny and kind... I'd like to get to know you further. Let alone, you're beautiful."

You blush and look away, he's not coming on strong, but could he be sending you signals that he's into you? Did you die and just find yourself in limbo with the angel before you?

"Do you want to go for a drive before I take you back?" He asks as you both notice you haven't lifted your hand on his. You quickly remove it and place it in your lap. 

"Sure, but this time please wear a helmet. I was worried sick thinking if something terrible might happen." 

He softly chuckles, "Of course, I have many in my garage to choose from. Curious though, is it because you care about me, Y/N?"

"Oh believe me, more than you know," you quickly cover your hands over your mouth as you realize what you've said. 

He kicks his lips and tries to brush it off. 

"I'm sorry," you apologize. "I really should use my filter from time to time."

"No need for apologies. Your truthfulness is refreshing."

"Well I have a lot of that. Probably more than I should. I bet you find in your line of work it's difficult to find people you can trust."

"Yeah, I definitely have a close knit of friends through the years. Do you have family here?"

"Yes, born and reared in the Bay," you say with confidence. "I went to culinary school in New York for a minute, however. But there's something about this city that's magical."

"So you believe in magic, but not fate?"

You laugh, "Okay, you got me there."

He finishes off his cappuccino and motions to ask if you're finished, which you nod and hand him your cup. He walks over to the sink and rinses out the cups. It's fascinating to watch him do mundane things like wash dishes. 

"I am beginning to enjoy the city. There is much richness to it and the landmarks are beautiful. I will be honest though, I haven't had much time to explore like I usually like to do when I'm on location." 

He places the cups back in the cupboard and dries his hands with a cream colored terry cloth. 

"You did mention you had a project up here. Mind if I ask what?"

His eyes light up as if he were a kid on Christmas Day expecting all the joys of the morning. 

"Oh well it's not for a movie. I'm not filming yet...least as far as I know. My agent, Meredith keeps me up on that."

"If not a movie, then…?"

"A book," he replies. 

"You're not giving me much here, buddy," you laugh as he joins you. 

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry. I...it's just something dear to me that I've been working on and haven't really announced anything yet."

"Look, I get it. Don't worry, no pressure, you reply as you start to get up.

"Well it's not that," he gestures a stopping signal with his hand. "I... I really don't know what it's about it. I'm collaborating with a friend of mine, a photographer. And we are in the early stages, that's all."

"Oh well it sounds great," you say enthusiastically. 

"Yeah...I feel good y'know? I feel like I'm doing something different and that I can connect to people on a different level."

"Keanu...the influencer," you say as you raise your hands up in the air as if an imaginary marquee is right before your eyes. 

"Haha, I wouldn't go that far. But, I'll have to keep you posted." 

"Yeah, that would be great," you cringe. Great. Everything is great. Why are you being such a spaz?

He doesn't notice, but he gets quiet again and you don't know what to do next. Silence sometimes makes you feel awkward and now throw in the ridiculously nice and dreamy man in front of you and you're a ball of nerves.

He seems relaxed, however. In tune with himself and surroundings. 

He smiles and holds out his hand, "C'mon. Let's get going on that ride. I'll take you to one of my favorite spots in the house besides the library...the garage. Oh, and don't forget your book."

You nod as you place it in your bag and accept his hand and hope to never let go.

[babieyangyang10]

violent ends (chapter 4)

(chapter 4)

series masterlist

genre: hunger games!au

pairing: huang renjun x oc, na jaemin x oc

warnings: mentions of prostitution, language, violent deaths, fighting, angst, fluff, + possible nsfw.

previous | next

"So, each of the districts get their own floors. Since you're from two, you get the second floor." Doyoung explains as we step out of the elevator.

As we walk into the apartment, I stare in awe at the glamorous quarters.  There are many giant glass columns and a random display of silver trees and rocks.

"Here is the living room and your rooms are over here. How about you freshen up for dinner?" suggests Doyoung. 

In my room, I am met by a bed with a silky, soft comforter. I make my way into the spacious bathroom and hop into the shower. Inside, there was a panel with hundreds of buttons that regulated water temperature, pressure, and even provided massaging sponges.

After finishing, a heater dried my hair and body completely. I pressed another button and a box began sending electrical currents through my scalp, instantly untangling my hair.

Returning the bedroom in comfortable clothes, I see a strange-looking remote on the bed-side table. Intrigued, I begin pressing random buttons. As a result, the window showcasing the lights and building of the Capitol changes into different sceneries.

First, there was a city street filled with cheerful families walking together. After pressing a different button, a dry and deserted desert appeared on the screen.

Switching it once again, a scene showing several mountains peaking through behind a forest of trees. I felt a pulling-feeling in my chest. My throat also feeling slightly choked-up.

During the holidays, every year Taeyong would take me into the mountains of our district. He would pretend to be my knight in shining armor, while I was the princess in distress.  He'd never tell anyone, but sometimes it was even the other way around.

It's also where he taught me how to hunt and find my own food. How to determine between what is the good food and what is the not so very good food.

It was the only time I remember us ever truly being kids. Not soldiers, just a thirteen and seven year old exploring the big, exciting world together.

Then everything went to shit after Taeyong went to the games.  That year, the Gamemakers had chosen a forest for the terrain. However, it was filled with dangerous wild dogs, wolves, and spiders. The spiders had enhanced speed and were extremely venomous. However, the wild dogs were capable of changing their form and copying the voices of the tributes.

Because of this, the entire Career pack was slaughtered alive. Taeyong was the only one who managed to escape. Wounded and without supplies, a twelve year old boy from District 11 named Dong Sicheng had found and formed a alliance with him. Sicheng had shared all of his supplies and even nursed him back to health.

On the last day, they were approached by the last remaining tribute. Taeyong, spotted him and fired an arrow straight into his heart. As he turned around to check on Sicheng, he was met with the boy clutching a harpoon, longed deep in his chest.

Dong Sicheng slowly died in Taeyong's arms.

After the cannon went off, the Captitol announced over the speakers that Lee Taeyong of District 2 was the winner of the 64th Hunger Games.

No longer did he take me to the mountains. Honestly, we never did anything together. Since then, the closest I ever got to be to him was the one time when the rest of my family stood by him during his stop in District 2 during his press tour.

I've always wondered how he felt. Wondered if  he blames himself for what happened. However, I never wanted to intrude. It's not like I ever got the opportunity to ask him, anyways.

However, since I'm going in the games soon. I hope to eventually work up the courage to sit down and have a real talk with him. The real Taeyong, not the victor or mentor he acts like in front of everyone else.

I opened the door to see Doyoung, Renjun, and Taeyong sitting at the dining room table.

Once I sat down in the acid-green chair, Taeyong began talking, "The plan for tomorrow is the same for the both of you. You go to group training. Spend time practicing something your weakest at. Swing a mace. Throw a spear. Tie a decent knot. It doesn't really matter, just save showing off for the private session with the Gamemakers. Are we clear?"

Renjun and I both nod our heads at him.

"Well, have the two of you gotten to know any of the other tributes yet?" pries an interested Doyoung.

"I haven't. Although, Athena seems to be checking out the competition, already."  Renjun answers, nonchalantly.

"Wonderful!" Doyoung innocently chimed, "It's never too early to start considering possible alliances. Are you going to ask anyone to join the two of you?"

"Oh, we're not-" Renjun and I said at the same time. We're laughing as if he's said the funniest joke in the world.

"We've always maintained our own completely different strategies. Renjun prefers to be the predator. There's no doubt in my mind that if he does want to work with others, it'll end up being an alliance with the other Careers. " Renjun just silently nods in agreement.

"And what about you?" asked Doyoung.

"Let's just say I prefer not to walk around with a huge target on my head. I want to team up with someone well-liked, so we can get resources through sponsors." I explained.

"Like Na Jaemin?" sneers Renjun.

"You know people have been calling him the Prince of Panem. He's made quite the impression, already." Doyoung chimes, "And he's not the only one. People have been raving about you, Athena. They've even started calling you, the Golden Girl."

"That's good." Taeyong quietly adds to the conversion, "If you keep this up you'll get lots of sponsors."

Doyoung suddenly blurts, "In fact, most people think Jaemin and you would make a good couple."

At this remark, Taeyong drops his knife loudly on the table, while Renjun chokes on his drink. My mouth begins opening and closing like a fish, struggling to come up with a reply.

"We're done for tonight. You two should go to bed now." Taeyong orders, not hiding his agitation.

Quickly, we all return to our rooms. I crash on my bed and stare up at ceiling.

Jaemin and I as a couple?

Where did they even dream up that possibility from? I mean, we only had one barely two-minute conversation. People really do amaze me sometimes.

My thoughts are broken by a barely-there knock at my door. I groan and force myself off the bed.

I roll my eyes, before opening the door and saying, "Renjun, would you kindly please fuck off?"

However, the person standing there was definitely not Renjun. I tilt my chin up to see no other than Lee Taeyong, towering over me.

"Oh, sorry." I frown, embarrassed.

"Can I come in?" He politely asks me.

I step to the side and allow him inside. Once he's fully in, I closed the door behind him.

"Finally decided to talk to me, huh?"

He just stays silent, just letting me say whatever I please.

"You know, I thought you'd at least be happy for me. I mean, you of all people should know that this is the best thing that could ever happen to me." The emotions I've been holding in for the past 10 years are finally coming to the surface.

Taeyong looks at me with pity, "Athena, there are some things you don't know. Things that the school or our parents never taught us."

"What are you even talking about?" I pressure.

"After the games, you couldn't see me for a reason." He took a heavy breath, "Sometimes, if a victor is considered desirable, the president gives them as a reward or allows people to buy them for money. It’s not just me either, the same thing happened to Finnick Odair a year later."

"What do you mean, 'buy'?" I swallow.

"For sex."

It’s quiet.

"I was given no choice. He said that he would kill both of our parents and even you if I didn't obey." His eyes begin tearing up, "Athena, you don't know how much I wanted to come see you and teach you things."

"Taeyong." I whimper.

I felt sick to my stomach. How could they do that to him? He was just a thirteen year old kid. Even worse, how could I let myself hate and be jealous of him, when all along he was the reason I was still even living?

"I know I'm a horrible brother, but please listen to me when I say the Capitol uses everyone, including you. You have been taught that this, the games, are normal and something to be proud of. You haven't even seen how horrible it is for the lower districts. They can barely make it through one day without starving. They have basically nothing, while the Capitol is feeding off them."

Anger rises up in me. I look around at all the expensive things in the room. Think about the large amount of fancy food I've consumed while in the Capitol. I'm furious, because I've been lied to and tricked. Furious for Taeyong and all the others the Capitol has taken advantage of.

I jump into my brothers arms and completely break down. "I'm so sorry. I didn't mean what I said Taeyong. It was stupid. I'm stupid."

"It's okay. You didn’t know." He shushes, while holding me.

“Listen to me. If you-“ he corrects himself, “When you win this thing, I’m not going to let him do anything to you, okay?”

“Taeyong, can I tell you something? I’ve just never got the chance to.” I ask.

He nods.

“What happened to Sicheng wasn’t your fault. You understand that, right?”

He painfully looks down at the floor, before slowly nodding.

“I’m serious, Taeyong. It’s not your fault.”

By the time he looks up, I am able to clearly see him. Underneath the years of pain, hidden away was a vulnerable boy. The tears come falling down his cheeks.

We spend the rest of the night talking about our past, telling stories. Both laughing and crying together.

My brother and I.