#please this angst-craving writer heart of mine | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

stardustfarm · 2 years

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this has nothing to do with stardew valley oops 😅

But this is sorta a call-out to check the tumblr rp community interest in a plot I’ve been craving to write.

Firstly, I’m requesting for someone to join a jcink forum rp to write this out. It is 18+, some of the more disturbing topics banned so it’s a pretty safe space, and I myself am 30 so I’m kinda looking for someone close to my age. Let’s say 25+ at least.

The genre is alternate universe Harry Potter, & just as a disclaimer: I do not support, endorse, or really even think of jkr. Her transphobic views are unspeakably damaging and indefensible. I started RP in this genre almost a decade ago and so it holds a unique place in my heart. I consider the community I’m in as a safe space that has ripped this world back to be used by any and all as they wish to; not just in the way this horrendous person meant for us to consume it.

With that said, here’s a few less serious things of note:

- site has no word count,

- two versions of a character app, neither very long & one offering a free form section to get creative with if you wanted

- very lax activity rules; it requires one post a month to be considered active

- since I’m requesting a professor character, I want to note that there are no requirements to hold classes. you’re free to if you want, but yeah it’s not required

I consider myself an intermediate-adv writer. I can write anywhere from 2 - 10 paragraphs depending on what’s going on. I adore headcanons, sharing Pinterest boards (& creating them for ships), and just generally gushing over our characters.

I’d like to chat a little one on one before I get to sharing the link to the forum, so we can test our chemistry since we’ll be writing a romance and er, tbh, I’ve had this plot burning a hole in my back pocket for literally years and I’ve only gotten to the very beginnings a few times. I’m really searching and hoping for someone who’ll be as engaged and willing to write this plot as I am, so before reaching out to me please do consider if you’ll have time for this.

At the very least, I just really, really would love to get far enough into the story that I could feel comfortable letting it go and putting it to rest finally if we don’t get to see it through… ^^’

That said I am an understanding and patient partner. My personal life can get very busy between a big family and rather social friends, so I totally get when life pulls you away from the rp. I’d just appreciate honest communication- If you get tired of the plot or bored or just can’t continue it because of reasons you DONT need to explain to me, I 100% will understand and will not hold it against you. I get it. No stress. And no expectations to come back to it, so trust that I will never bother or pester for anything.

Jesus I didn’t mean to write so much, sorry!

The Basic Details: slow burn, reunited old flames; mutual pining, lots of fluff w/ a dash of angst. Age range 32-35, I’m looking for a female writer to create a blonde female witch to pair up with my wizard. Suggested fc is Sarah Gadon, but any blonde could work as long as it isn’t Tswift.

If that summary caught your interest & you’re okay with joining a forum rp for it, please continue to the read more to get a more in-depth description.

So it’s essentially a case of right person, wrong time, and the intention behind it is for them to end up together again after growing up, apart. They aren’t first loves or anything, but they are certainly as close to soulmates as anyone can get.

Sharing traits such as being perfectionists, bookish, having strong moral compasses, craving order and routine, they are wholly harmonious with the occasional bumps to keep things from reading too perfect. They met in an Apothecary - the requested female character working there and mine visiting often to purchase ingredients for work as he was under a potioneering apprenticeship after graduating from Hogwarts.

Mine is 35, and I was requesting an age as close to that as possible (if not the same) just to help keep timelines pretty close. If they’re the same age I could see them running in different circles at Hogwarts to keep them from being too close, as I’d like the beginnings of their bond to really start until their late teens, early 20s after meeting in that Apothecary. She could also have graduated from another European school, and just ended up working in this apothecary!

I’d like to keep a fair bit of it open so there’s totally room for more places where the characters diverge, but in essence my character has always sought out a peaceful, humble life, while the requested character came from some struggle or hardship and simply wanted to contribute to the world in some way.

In keeping with that, I was thinking she sought out a career that was either dangerous, such as Auror/Hit Witch, or possibly culturally impacting like a Curse-Breaker. To be honest I personally am leaning to requesting Auror/Hit Witch, but it is open!

Something happened to her in the course of her career that made her leave it. Maybe an injury, the loss of a colleague, maybe she found herself in some kind of trouble and being placed on nonnegotiable leave herself. Or, maybe it was just harder to enact change/contribute in the way a hopeful twenty-something had originally wanted and she just… got lost. Needed a break. Whatever the source, she’s ended up at Hogwarts to teach where she meets up with my character again.

& from there I just imagined my character being as smitten as when they first met, but he’s… hesitant. They hadn’t been in contact. Has no idea if she’s with someone or like, if she’d ever be into him again. I’m such a sucker for fluff so I was hoping she’d be equally as smitten in return but for the same or similar reasons, there’s a lot of hesitancy.

It is mutual pining to the max. There’s lots we can discuss as far as conflict / angst.

The classes available for claiming are pretty slim, I won’t lie. There’s been an influx of new people so, stuffs gotten taken. But Herbology is still free to claim, and I assume if she worked at an apothecary, she also has a passion for potion brewing they maybe comes from, or doubles as a love of plants and gardening.

I look forward to connecting with anyone! Let’s write something super cute and self indulgent 😅

#rp #harry potter rp #alternate universe Harry Potter rp #rp buddy search #jcink roleplay #25+ rp #mutual pining #romance rp

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luversgirl · 3 years

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MY OBX REC LIST

( ☾ = angst, ☆ = head-canon, ❀ = fluff, ✧ = smut )

rafe cameron

— mr. ghost face ✧ ( so mf funny )

— craving ✧ ( no words 😶 )

— ab riding ✧ ( oh. my. god. part 2, OH . MY. GOD )

— always been there ( series )

— manic ☾ ( love this )

— father figure ( i would die for this series. )

— eyeliner ☾ ❀

— love language ❀

— good luck charm ☾ ❀ ( qb!rafe >>> )

— honey ✧ ( series, rafe being a sub? yes please )

— euro trip ( series feat topper boi )

— broken mirror ❀ ( ma heart, it hurts )

— the aftermath ✧ ( definition of me: whore for threesomes )

— rafey ❀ ☾ ( my heart omg )

— I want you to ❀

— qb!rafe teaching you how to play football ❀ ( aww )

— dazed ✧ ( *walks to church* )

— won’t give up ☾ ( damn daniel part 2 )

— unexpected ✧ ( oh my lordy lord )

jj maybank

— not perfect ☾ ( series )

— kick his ass ❀ ( i cant omg my heart part 2 )

— last year ☾

— sorry ✧

— bad day ❀ ☾ ( crying rn )

— wonder what she thinks of me ✧ ☾

— stains ☾ ( my heart = 💔 part 2 )

— the project ❀

— take a seat, princess ✧

— oh baby ☾

— tears ☾ ❀ ( the end omg )

— the challenges of having sex in a dorm room ✧

— forever? always ❀ ☾ ( ma heart, ma soul )

— pornhub ❀ ✧

— i thought i lost you ☾ ( ahhh )

— bellyache ☾ ( part two )

— cuts and bruises ❀

— shark bait ☾ ❀ ( chomp chomp )

— hot and bothered ✧

— touch starved ❀ ( i want this ahhhhh )

sarah cameron

— beach moments ✧

— dear diary ❀ ( so muck fluff my heart is gonna explode )

— take my breath ✧ ( feat jj )

— choose ☾ ❀ ( the end omg )

— experimental love ✧

— truth or dare ❀ ( jj was so funny lmao )

— that's my girlfriend ❀

— first time ✧ ( I’m a slut 4 sarah idk if u noticed )

— cruel summer ☾ ❀

— mine ☾ ✧

pope heyward

— cuddles ❀

— playing both sides ✧ ( feat rafe )

— better things to come ❀ ( awe )

— imagine ✧ ( their works >>> )

— grand gesture ❀ ( i want this so bad omg )

— lesson 1 don’t eat out your best friends girlfriend ✧

— in your room ❀

— nothing compares ☾

— enough for you ☾ ( sad we lost pope then we got rafe 😼 )

— popes secret ☾ ❀

— soft fingering ✧

barry

— salvation in the form of your grace ☾ ( sobbinggg )

— soft ❀ ( awe )

— dating barry headcanon ✧ ❀ ☆

— jealousy ✧

— a proposal ❀

— barry x hippie!reader ❀ ☆ ( shitting tears rn )

— nsfw alphabet ✧ ☆

— peach ✧ ( feat rafe of course )

— fucked around ❀ ( i can’t i can’t omg )

john b

— have mercy ✧

— where were you in the morning ❀ ( theirs more parts )

— i’m a what? ❀ ☾ ( i luv this sm )

— meeting the mother ❀

— flying high ❀ ( went on my first fight a in aug, feel u john b )

— drive in movie ✧ ( luv this song )

— red handed ✧ ( feat jj, so mf hot omggg )

— safe haven ☾ ❀

— our secret ❀ ☾ ( i hate luke 🔪🔪🔪 )

— always knew ☾ ❀

— off his mind ☾ ( ugh the angsttt )

— hold me ( content warning//sa )

— miles and miles ☾ ❀ ( so mf cute )

— rich and sad ✧ ☾

— if you ever want to be in love ❀ ( the call ahhhhh )

— morning ✧ ( i hope them walls are thicker then they look )

kiara

— mercy ✧ ( feat ms sarah cameron ovi )

— girls need love ❀ ( the fluff ahhhhh )

— surfing lessons with kiara ❀ ( my heart omg )

— girlfriend ✧ ❀

— two of the same ❀ ( yall i- )

— can’t handle it ✧ ( feat sarah )

— kiss the girl ❀ ( so mf cute )

— wish i was sarah ☾ ❀ ( ugh the angst part 2 )

notes: omg tumbler got mad there’s 100 links oops imma probably make another one lol anyway go read the fics by all these amazingly talented writers!!!

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dizzydancingdreamer · 4 years

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“So that’s how you want to play this, love?" | The Mikaelson Boys

Hey My Lovelies! I hope all is well today! I received a request ages ago from @activist-af to do something like this, as you will read below. I honestly aimed to fit the movie night theme in there but it was swallowed up pretty fast! I only meant for this fic to be 3000 or so words but, as it always seems to do, it got away from me.I truly hope that you enjoy this, you've given me an unwavering amount of support these past few months while I was battling a major bout of depression and writers block. I can't repay all the kindness and love you've given me but I hope this is a start! Much love darling! And much love to all of you lovelies! Please have a fantastic evening for me! <3

Please read before continuing: I usually wouldn't write this much before my story but I wanted to add this: this story is my first full blown smut. I'm honestly not sure how well it will go over but I tried to make it as loving and healing as I could. I take my writing very seriously. I know sex for many is a touchy subject, and that truly pains me. I sincerely hope every single one of you reading this feels all the love and saftey I tried to incorporate into this peace. I wish you an eternity of love and healing. Be safe my loves!

Request: "Could u do a mikaelson boys x reader? Any plot really, but I’d very much love it if it was a bit more Kol focused. there’s just such a lack of content for all three of them and I love your writing so much. If u need any plot point ideas maybe a movie night kinda thing? I really hold him a bit higher than the other boys. Or something similar to the fic with the Klaus + Eli being injured? Fluffy ending please, smut is fantastic too 🖤"

Description: Y/n is upset that the boys won't let her come on their mission with them, feeling isolated and useless. Kol is supposed to stay behind and watch out for her however things get heated after she tells him off.

Pairing: The Mikaelson Boys x Fem!Reader, mainly Kol and Elijah

Warnings: THIS IS AN 18+ ONLY FIC!!! This is a full blown smut, I honestly do not know how it happened, probably 4000/5000 words are pure sex scenes, also there's a bit of fighting/angst at the beginning of the first scene but it doesn't last

Word count: 5343 (I'm so sorry)

Tags: ANGST, SMUT (full on), FLUFF

(Pics aren't mine but the moodboard is :) )

“I really don’t see why you guys are leaving me behind, again,” you run an agitated hand through your hair, huffing indignantly at the two boys in front of you.

Yes, boys. Not men. If they aren't going to treat you like the full grown woman you are then no way in hell are you going to give them any validation either. Even in your head.

“It’s too dangerous,” Elijah’s chocolate eyes are stern, his hands clenching at his sides, “I can’t risk the witches doing anything to you as a way to get to us. You’re too important.”

Your chest warms slightly at his words but it isn’t enough to break down your resolve. Three hundred years under your belt; they’re going to need to do better than that if they want to keep you away. There are only so many times you can stay away from a fight, only so many times you can watch them come home hurt knowing that if you had gone with them then maybe you could have prevented it. You’re a family and you’re tired of feeling like you aren’t pulling your weight.

You narrow your eyes at the tall boy, still not man, trying to peer through all the red you’re seeing, “I’m not a child, Elijah.”

He stares right back, not backing down, his face cut like marble, unwavering. Beautiful but harsh. Stone. He wears a white shirt, the first button popped and the sleeves rolled to his forearms. His veins are prominent and tempting. Elijah means business. You swallow the lump in your throat, pushing away the heat growing in your stomach.

“Love, trust me, we know you aren't a child. Any other time I would gladly rip you upstairs and prove it. Right now, though, I agree with him. You’re staying here,” Klaus’ softer voice pulls your attention from your staring match with the eldest Mikaelson.

He has a leather jacket on, the material clinging tight to his arms, ready to burst. He’s smiling but it doesn’t reach his crystal eyes. He folds his arms neatly in front of him. He’s not going to budge either.

You scoff at him, shaking your head, “I want to come, Klaus. I need to.”

A new voice joins the three of you in the foyer, “I can make that happen, darling, but you’ve got to stay home with me if you want that.”

You don't even need to turn around to hear the smirk on Kol’s voice but you do anyway, meeting the youngest Mikaelson face to face. He has a grin on his lips, one that, in any other situation, would have you weak in the knees. He has a sweatshirt on and a pair of sleep shorts. He’s on babysitting duty, he doesn’t need anything else. You only roll your eyes at him before facing Elijah once more.

“I’m part of this family, too, you know. It should be my choice,” you have to will your voice not to crack, keeping your tone as low and as steady as you can, “I’m not useless, Elijah, as much as you’d obviously disagree.”

You rub your hands over your bare arms, fending off a sudden chill. You feel like there’s ice coursing through your veins. A traitorous tear tracks down your cheek but you make no move to get it. Elijah’s hardened face softens when he notices.

“Baby, come on,” he reaches to grab you but you step back, not allowing him to touch you.

He can’t do that, make the decisions for you. Maybe if you were still human it would be called for but now it’s not. Sure, you aren't a millennium like they are but you’re not a piece of glass either. You’re strong, whether they want to acknowledge it or not.

“Don’t, Elijah,” you back away further, your cheeks drenched but your eyes fierce, “I’ll see you guys in a few days. Be safe.”

You turn and walk away, ignoring all three brothers as they call out to you, heading up to your room before any of them decide to follow you. You close the door, not slamming it but not exactly shutting it gently either. You can hear Elijah sigh from the front hall and you know he’s tugging on his hair. Klaus swears, his frustrated voice floating up to your ears. More tears fall but you brush them away angrily, lifting a pillow from your bed and screaming into it. No doubt they can hear it but, right now, you couldn't care less. The front door shuts and your heart plummets.

You sit on the edge of your bed, gripping your dark comforter tightly. Usually you like being the one they take care of. You like being held, how small they make you feel. Right now, though, it’s too much.

A soft knock draws your attention to the door, Kol’s careful voice cutting through the wood, “darling?”

“Leave me alone, Kol,” you try your best to make your words harsh but you only sound tired.

“Not likely, love,” he presses, “you know I can go all night, now it’s up to you what that means.”

Your cheeks flush and, as if he can see you through the door, he chuckles. The sound echos through your chest, stirring the remains of anger and frustration and mixing them with something hot and untamed. You pull the door open, coming face to face with the smirking Mikaelson.

“Sorry you landed with babysitting duty, Kol, but I’ve kept myself alive for three hundred years now and I’m pretty sure I can handle two more days on my own. Why don’t you go help Elijah and Klaus, yeah? Seeing as you are the only three who can actually do any good. I’m clearly not strong enough to do anything so I’ll just sit here and look pretty and do absolutely nothing at all because I’m useless. Okay?”

With that you close the door in his face. Well, you try to but he wedges his body in the way so you can’t shut him out. Whatever smile had previously been on his face is long gone and in its place sits a deep frown. His brown eyes ice over slightly and he stands taller than he did mere seconds ago. You can feel a switch in the atmosphere and suddenly you’re face to face. You honestly can’t tell which one of you is more pissed off.

“So that’s how you want to play this, love,” he pushes closer to you, “you want to get angry, yeah? Alright darling, I can do that.”

You open your mouth to protest but before any profanities can fly out his lips are on yours, fierce and strong. He uses his foot to kick the door closed, slamming it into place. It’s done merely for effect. No one is home but the two of you. He spins you around aggressively, pushing you roughly against the hardwood. His teeth sink into your bottom lip, no doubt drawing blood. As if on cue a copper taste fills your mouth, drowning your senses in red. This time, though, the anger is mixed with a wicked kind of lust.

Your hands find his hair without your permission, tugging harshly at the roots. He groans into your mouth, a sound that makes you want to slap him across the face and wrap your legs around him all the same. His hand snakes around your waist, squeezing your hip with a fervour that will no doubt leave bruises that will take longer than usual to heal. He pushes against you, every single part of him rock hard.

“God fucking damnit, Kol,” his lips find your throat with painful ease, sucking the sensitive skin into his mouth in a way thats just this side of painful over pleasurable.

Right now, though, you crave every bit of pain that Kol lays on you. In a sick way you’re proving that you can take it. That you’re strong enough to do the things that they do. Another flash of red floods your vision when you think of the other two Mikaelson's who refused to let you help. You drag one of your hands down Kol’s back, scratching hard enough for him hiss against your neck.

He jerks away from you quickly, only long enough to rip the sweatshirt over his head before he attacks your neck again. He sinks his teeth in at the same moment he rips your tank top in half, lulling you into that sweet mixture of pleasure and pain, hate and lust once more. His shoulders are deliciously toned under your searching fingers and this time when you drag your nails down his back you know you draw blood. Serves him right anyway.

“Fuck, baby,” he wraps a hand around both of your wrists, pinning your hands above your head, “that kinda hurt.”

You want to claw the smirk off of his face. Or kiss it. You can’t quite decide. His other hand is slowly sliding up your back, inching towards the clasp of your bra. His eyes burn into yours, the inferno behind them nothing less than intense. Your heartbeat pounds in your ears so loud it’s almost hypnotic when combined with the tantalizing draw of his hand. It lulls you into a false sense of security, your eyelids heavy in anticipation. He stops moving when his fingers are about to undo the hooks.

He pushes his hips closer to yours, locking you between his body and the door. His stomach is hot against yours and cut like marble. Your fingers itch to feel every bump and dip with agonizing intricacy. Every inch of your skin is alight, every hair raised waiting for anything to happen. You can feel every breath he takes as if it’s your own, your covered breasts just barely grazing him with each rise and fall of his chest. It’s delicious torture.

“Before we go any further here, I need to know what you want. Do you want some quick fuck that’s going to leave you more angry when it’s done?” He rolls his hips against yours, sending sparks flying through your body at the first real touch you’ve had tonight, “or do you want me to make love to you like you know I can. And make all these terrible feelings go away. It’s your choice, darling?”

His words tangle and knot in the pit of your stomach, weaving through the white hot hatred that had been building in your stomach until it explodes. They hit you right at the source like missiles aimed with the utmost precision to destroy every bit of anger left in you. Tears prickle at the edge of your vision, your senses overloaded from the sudden loss of your fury. All that’s left in its wake is this gut wrenching feeling of not being good enough. It’s the original problem and he just effortlessly broke through to it.

“I,” you tug your bruised lip between your teeth, if only to keep it still, “make it go away, Kol. Please.”

“That’s all I want to do, darling.”

He releases your wrists, opting instead to haul your body into his arms and slamming his lips against yours once more. You waste no time running your freed fingers down his sculpted chest, admiring the way his muscles tense as he holds you up. You push yourself as close to his body as you can get, wrapping your legs around his taught stomach and clinging on for dear life. He kisses you slowly, as if drawing all the negative energy out of your body with his lips.

He walks the two of you backwards towards your bed, sitting on the edge, leaving you straddling his hips in the most delicious way. You push your hips to bring you closer together, wanting to feel every part of him that you can. He meets every movement with his own energy, wrapping an arm around you back to keep you pressed against him. Your body is warming up once more in his arms.

He pulls his lips from yours reluctantly, his hand snaking back to the clasp on your back, “this needs to go.”

You shiver at the light touch of his fingertips on your spine, arching with the click of the hooks coming undone. He pulls the lace from your chest slowly, his thumbs grazing down your arms, memorizing every inch of skin he can get his hands on. His eyes meet yours again and he drops the fabric on the ground next to your bed. His hands, now resting on your hips, trail fire up your stomach as they trace their way over your ribs.

“Kol, please,” you wrap your arms around his shoulders, reveling in the warmth of his chest so close to your own, “I need you.”

There’s a glint in his eye again but this time you don’t want to slap him. No this time you want him to do heavenly things to every part of you. You want him to take the last remains of this awful feeling and snuff it out with his mouth. His hands finally crest the remainder of your ribcage, his thumbs teasing the underside of your breasts with tantalizingly careful circles. Tears sting your vision again from all the pent up energy inside of you.

“What shall I do, darling,” his thumbs draw along the sides of your breasts, stoking the untameable fire in the pit of your stomach once more, “tell me how you want me to touch you.”

His fingers dance closer to their target, each stroke driving your brain further into it’s Kol induced frenzy. All you can see, all you can hear, all you can smell is the boy in front of you.

“Kol,” his name falls from your lips in a desperate moan, “please just do something, god.”

He chuckles, a sound that flows like honey and wraps around every inch of you like silk. His eyes sear into your own, daring you to break his stare but you don’t. You can’t

“Well I could do this.”

His thumbs roll over your hardened nipples, as if to punctuate his words, and you see stars. You don’t even try to stop the moans that tumble from your lips, turning to clay in his hands. You give him free reign to mould your body in any way he desires, as long as hands never leave your skin. He pinches each bud between his fingers gently, pulling more praises from deep within you. His eyes never leave your face, drinking in each expression with unashamed greed.

“Or maybe I could do this.”

You know what’s coming when he leans forward, It’s quite clear what his intentions are. However, what you aren’t expecting is for the first gentle nip to send you so violently crashing over the edge that you have to squeeze your thighs around him to avoid falling off the bed. He doesn’t stop when you cry out and you don't want him to. Every swirl of his tongue around your nipple sends you spiraling further into the sweet oblivion he’s created just for you. He rocks his hips against yours while his mouth assaults you, pressing the delicious hardness against you while you fall apart.

He detaches his lips from your lips when you start to come down from your high, kissing his way up your sternum, over your collar bone, before settling on your throat.

“So beautiful darling,” he pulls your skin into his mouth as if he didn't just get enough just moments ago, “so damn beautiful.”

You press down on his hard length again, pulling a groan from deep within his chest, “I want all of you, Kol. Please.”

That's all the encouragement he needs to flip the two of you over and lay you on your back. He kneels between your legs, hooking his thumbs in your plaid sleep shorts and pulling them off much faster than he had down with your bra. He’s more than warmed up now, something that excites you to no end. You’re left laying in a pair of black lace panties that match the bra on your floor.

Kol’s eyes go dark at the sight, a growl that hardens your nipples again rumbling through the air. He leans down, pressing a kiss to the inside of your thigh before pulling the lace off of you once more and adding it to the growing pile of clothes. He kisses the junction of your thigh next, sending electricity rippling through your body. It restarts the heat once more and the familiar wildfire rips through your abdomen. You’re not sure if you’ll be able to stand many more orgasms if each one is to be like the first.

“Please just make love to me, Kol, I need to feel you.”

He lifts his head from your thighs, a sight that you will never grow tired of, and his eyes set ablaze, “I was made for nothing more.”

Your heart flutters rapidly in your chest, a warmth spreading like butter over your bones. He kicks his own shorts and boxers off quickly, moving back up your body to rest between your legs. You drink in the heat radiating off his body, allowing it to soothe the remaining ache leftover from your small throw down. His one hand slips under your head, lacing through your hair gently. The other reaches between you, lining himself up against your opening. The slightest touch of him against you is enough to have you mewling his name already.

He teases you slightly, taking his sweet time before pushing in. The first thrust is pure magic, filling you in the way that only Kol can. Each of you boys feel different. Kol lights every one of your nerves on fire with his slow movements. He makes you feel every deliberate movement. He makes you know that every circle of his hips, every time he joins you together is done to perfection exactly how he intends. Kol makes you aware of your entire body and just how much control he has over it.

He pulls back slowly before thrusting back inside of you hard enough to rock your bed into the wall. You clench around him without warning, pulling your name from his lips with mouthwatering ease and sending small shocks through your lower half.

“Christ, baby,” he rocks his hips deeper into yours, burying himself all the way inside you, “how are you so close again already.”

You giggle quietly from underneath him, wrapping your legs around his hips and rolling your own to meet his thrusts. Your hands glide over his shoulders, soothing the scratches you left earlier. You draw his face to your own, pulling his lips down to graze yours. You want him to feel every word you say.

“Don’t play coy, you know exactly what you’re doing,” the end of your sentence is blurred with unrelenting moans.

His hand grabs your leg, pushing your knee to your chest before pushing you into the mattress with a world altering thrust, “you’re right darling, I just like to hear you say it.”

He closes the gap between your lips with another shattering push, your walls clenching harder than before around him again. You swallow each moan that slips from his mouth and into yours. His nutmeg scent clings to you and you know it will take days to scrub him off of you, not that you want to. You could very well spend the next century wrapped up in Kol in every single way possible.

He picks up the pace, slamming into you with controlled ease. Your hands lace through his hair, keeping him as close to you as possible. Your senses are overwhelmingly heightened, allowing you to feel every damned inch of him. You’re in serious danger of falling apart. The fiery ball in your stomach is at its peak once more. When he pulls your lip between his teeth, and you taste the crimson, it explodes.

This time you don't just see stars, you see the sun and the moon and every planet in the solar system. He continues to move in and out of you, drawing out the intensity of your orgasm as he rides his own out. You cling to him with everything you have, refusing to breathe anything but Kol. Everything in this moment is about him and the way he makes you feel. Nothing else matters anymore. Perhaps nothing even mattered before. All there is, all there has ever been, is this one moment.

When you finally land back on earth, he slowly pulls out of you, giving you one last taste of electricity before drawing you to lay on his chest. Your ears ring from the energy you just exerted at Kol’s mercy, your skin deliciously sticky against his own. You're completely and undeniably spent.

You don’t realize that you’re crying until you go to speak, “Kol.”

You feel the sharp inhale he takes rather than hear it. Before you can blink the fresh wave of tears away he’s flipped you around, laying between your legs again and propped up on his elbows. His face is pure concern, his eyebrows creased together in a way that makes you want to smooth every harsh line away. It makes you cry that much harder.

“Darling, talk to me,” he runs a soothing hand down your thigh, pulling you close to him, “what’s wrong baby?”

The tears pour faster at the gentle tone in his voice, drawing an answer to the surface before you even process what you’re saying, “Do they think I’m useless? Do you?”

Your voice is shattered, all the emotions from today coming together in yet another crescendo. You can hear your blood rushing through your ears, drowning out the sounds around you. It’s probably the reason you miss the footsteps pounding up the stairs. You can feel Kol’s soft caresses but just barely. The only thing registering in your mind is the feeling of being completely and utterly weak. Why do they keep you around if you can’t even hold your own?

“God’s no, never. Not even a little bit,” just as Kol speaks, the door opens.

Well, the door slams open, hitting the wall with a crack that echoes through the large house. Kol isn’t startled. He should be but he doesn’t even flinch at the bang. You, on the other hand, tense underneath him, the pounding in your ears still as intense as before. A woodsy scent flows through the now open doorway, pine mingling with your already nutty skin. The pieces start clicking together, albeit at a slower pace than you like.

You’re almost certain you know who’s in the doorway but you look anyway to make sure, “Elijah.”

His name is a whisper and it gets lost under Elijah's own words, his dark eyes searing into yours, “Kol, do you mind giving us a moment?”

Kol glances down at you, a small smile playing on his lips. You plead with him to stay but this is Kol, he’s your hell-raiser. He places a soft kiss on your forehead before he stands, still completely naked, and walks out of the room.

He pauses on the other side of the door, settling a hand on his brother’s shoulder, “careful brother, she scratches.”

Elijah shuts the door when he leaves, much gentler than he had been when opening. Your boys, always the ones for theatrics. He leans against the frame, folding his arms over his chest. You stand from the bed, trying to meet his height but failing. You wipe your eyes with the back of your hand but it doesn’t do much to clear the droplets. He tracks your every movement with a fire raging behind his chocolate eyes. You’re painfully aware of how much of your skin is on display for him; that is, all of it.

“What,” you pause when your voice cracks, stealing a moment to compose yourself, “what are you doing here? You’re supposed to be off saving the day.”

He pushes off the door, taking a few steps towards you. You can see he's fighting back a lot of primal instincts. He's as affected by your lack of clothes as you are. His eyes shift rapidly between his usual brown and a deeper coal colour. Despite the situation, you can’t help the heat seeping from between your thighs. He stops a few feet in front of you. There’s no way he can’t smell you right now.

“I was needed elsewhere,” his eyes dip down momentarily, his jaw clenching, “by someone infinitely more important.”

You watch him squeeze his fists together, forcing his eyes to remain on yours. The determination in them is unwavering and fierce. He takes another step towards you.

“It seemed important a few hours ago,” you drop your eyes to your feet, breaking his stare.

He grabs your chin, forcing you to keep looking at him and, in turn, igniting your body, “I assure you it was not nearly as important as making sure that you’re ok.”

Your throat tightens, aching with the promise of even more tears. You wish you could just stop. You’re not afraid to cry but usually you can control it. Right now you can’t. Everything has been building, every little insecurity has pooled, and today was the chip in the damn needed to make the whole thing collapse. It’s too much.

“I’m not,” you wrap your arms tight around yourself, gripping your arms with bruising strength to try and hold back the tremors, “ I am not okay Eli. I feel so helpless. Everytime you come home bleeding and exhausted and where am I?” You run a trembling hand through your mussed hair, yanking at the roots, “Here. Always just here, useless, letting you and Klaus and Kol take it all for me. Am I really that weak? That I’m just extra collateral damage to worry about? What is it, Elijah?”

The words pour from you, each one making him flinch like he’s being hit by an invisible enemy. Every syllable is a bullet to his chest. His body tenses further, his eyes no longer holding any trace of their usual warm brown. Instead they're pitch black, the veins under his eyes a deep plum. The veins in his arms pop as well, his fists iron tight. He curses under his breath when you finish. His voice is gravelly and scrapes the deepest pit of your soul.

He takes a deep breath, closing his eyes for a moment. When he opens them again, whatever resolve he had been clinging to snaps. He pulls you towards him, wrapping his strong hands around your hips and lifting you against him, giving you a second to wrap your bare legs around his clothed hips.

“Elijah, what are you doing?” You cling to his chest, trying to avoid tumbling out of his arms when he begins walking you towards your bed once more.

He doesn't answer your question, laying you down against your ruffled comforter, “You aren’t collateral damage, baby.”

His voice is the lowest you’ve ever heard it, emanating from somewhere deep inside him. He opens the first few buttons of his shirt, pulling it up and over his head before making it even halfway down his chest. He drops it, much like he Kol had not long before, next to your bed. Kicking off his shoes, he kneels on the bed, coming to rest between your thighs. The heat emanating from you is now a furnace and it in no way goes unnoticed by him. His dark eyes swim across your naked body, drinking in every inch.

“Eli-” whatever you’re going to say is obliterated when he leans down and attaches his lips to the crook of your thigh, dangerously close to being exactly where you need him.

“You aren't weak,” he moves to your other thigh, nipping at the delicate skin and pulling unintelligible murmurs from your throat.

He kisses his way to your center, the anticipation growing like a knot in your stomach, begging to be unraveled once more. Even in the midst of falling apart you can’t get enough of these men. He lays a soft kiss against you, offering you the slightest glimpse of what you know his mouth can do. In the exact same way you had with Kol earlier, every part of you craves Elijah.

Your body arches willingly to meet the first swipe of his tongue, his name falling from your lips like a praise, “you aren't a burden to me, you beautiful creature.”

You cry out as he works his mouth expertly against you, his words humming ecstasy into your skin, melting away any trace of doubt in your mind. His arms wrap around your thighs, bringing you as close to his face as he can get you. The sight of him completely engulfed in your heat is almost enough alone to send you tumbling right there and then over the edge.

“You mean more to me than anything else on this fucking earth,” his dark eyes meet yours as he works you dangerously close to breaking before letting up once more, “and if I have to spend every hour for the next hundred years worshipping you to prove it then consider it done.”

He lowers his mouth against you harder, sucking your electrified warmth with renewed vigour. Your hands seek out his hair, tugging him against you and raising your hips to meet every pass of his tongue. The smell of pine trees and sex envelope you, brining you the closest yet to the kind of high only Elijah can draw from you. In this moment you’re nothing more than entirely his.

“I cannot lose you, baby,” he slips a few of his fingers inside you, “please let me protect you. I need to. Please.”

He curls his fingers just as the last syllable rolls off his tongue and into your core, shattering you into a million tiny pieces. Your hands fist his hair as your body clenches around his hand, pulling a delectable groan from his lips. Your third orgasm almost puts you to sleep on the spot, each of your muscles completely exhausted. Elijah watches you come undone the entire way through, nothing less than reverent awe locked on his face.

He wastes no time pulling your spent body into his arms, wrapping you as close to him as he can manage. You bury yourself against his neck, admiring how even the most unassuming parts of him have an undue amount of strength. He truly is your warrior.

“Eli,” you yawn into his chest, basking in the warmth of his skin, “I can protect myself.”

He tightens his arms around you, “I know you can, baby, but you shouldn't need to. I’ve been searching my entire life for a meaning. A thousand years of trying to be honorable. Then I found you and, all of a sudden, it all makes sense. All the searching and fighting and pain finally has a purpose: to protect you. Let me take it for you. Please.”

You’re speechless, there isn’t anything else to it. His words hit you with immense power, sinking into your skin and settling around your bones. You’re his, all of theirs, to watch over. You really didn't know he felt this strongly. You’ve always had to defend yourself. Perhaps you just aren't used to someone else being so willing to take on that task. Someone begging to take it.

He stands suddenly, with you still in his arms, and walks out of your room, starting down the hall. The faintest sound of rushing water fills your ears, lulling you into a welcome daze.

“Where are we going, Eli?” You have yet to open your eyes, stuck in the soft between being awake and falling asleep.

He kisses your forehead, resting his head on yours, “Niklaus said he wanted to take a bath, my love.”

#the originals #the vampire diaries #tvd #to #kol mikaelson #kol mikaelson x reader #the originals imagine #the vampire diaries imagine #elijah mikaelson #elijah mikaelson x reader #klaus mikaelson x reader #klaus mikaelson imagine #klaus mikaelson #elijah mikaelson smut #kol mikaelson smut #smut

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jawritter · 4 years

Text

My Best Friend..

Request: hi I have dean x reader request! the reader and dean are friends with benefits but recently she’s just been down in the dumps and just wants some platonic affection and not sex. as the writer you can do what u want but could you add Dean playing with the reader's hair? I have a weakness for it lol thanks!

Warnings: Smut, unprotected sex, unrequited/requited feelings, Language, angst, fluff, that’s about it.

Pairing: Dean x Reader

Word Count: 2401

A/N: As always all mistakes are mine! Please don’t copy my work! Feedback is golden! Hope you enjoy this one!

Want more? Check out my Masterlist!

**MASTERLIST**

Dean's lips crashed into yours as soon as you crossed the threshold of your room back in the bunker. Hands roaming your body as he backs you to your bed. His lips left little marks along the way as he trailed his way down your collar bone, grinding his impressive erections against your core as he presses his body to yours, holding you to the mattress that he'd just laid you down on.

Little moans and soft breaths filling the room as he rips your underwear to the side, to be wired up and full of adrenaline to even properly remove your clothing. He'd gotten your pants off, but lost patients after that.

One hand leaves your body as he roughly rips his belt open and shoves his pants and boxers down to his knees.

"Fuck Y/N. need you," he grunted against your neck as he rutted his already leaking tip against your waiting core.

Your body accepts him like he belonged there, just like it had done so many times before. Dean didn't give you much time before he sat his brutal pace, driving you both very quickly toward the edge. The sounds of moans and his name fill the room as he pounds himself into you over and over again until his pace starts to falter.

"Fuck Y/N, cum with me, baby girl," he gritted out as he snaked his hand between your bodies, finding your swollen bundle of nerves with ease, and rubbing harsh circles as he continued to pound into you at a matching pace; winding the coil tighter and tighter in your belly, as he brought you up higher and higher with him.

With one more thrust of his hips, you were both tumbling over the edge together. Your hands flew to his shoulders as you try and ground yourself, your orgasm is so strong that you saw stars. Dean slowly pumped himself in you, working you both through it until you both had regained control of your bodies, leaving you both a panting, sweating mess, and a pile of human limbs on top of the bed.

Just like he always does after a hunt, Dean gets up slowly after pulling out of you, fixing his clothes, and buckling his belt. He turned and looks at you before he walked out of the door, giving you a tight-lipped smile as he made his way to the kitchen to find whatever he would be drinking tonight. You had returned his smile, hiding the fact that inside your heart was breaking.

Dean and yourself had been, "friends with benefits,'' so to speak ever since you moved into the bunker. You'd known the Winchesters for years before ever moving into the bunker, having grown up in the life. You remember them even when you were all just teenagers. When your father died last year Dean had offered to come live and hunt with them, safety in numbers, and you accepted because you were lost. You had nowhere else to go. It was the logical thing to do.

It wasn't so bad at first. When either of you needed a stress release, or just needed to scratch that itch, as they say, you turned to each other. You trusted each other. It worked out just fine when it all started. Dean needed to blow off some steam, and you needed Dean.

As time when on, and no matter how hard you tried to stop it, or deny it, or even fight it, you had developed feelings for the tall hunter. Now it was too late. He had your heart whether he knew it or not. The problem was, this was all you ever got from Dean. He wasn't a very affectionate sort of person. He did what he came to do, then left, that was just his way. Sometimes you felt like to him you were no more than an easy lay, and that's why he kept you around.

Let's be honest.

You'd never be able to keep up with the boys as far as strength and ability when it came to hunting. They were Winchesters. They were the best. All you seemed to be good for is a traveling fuck buddy for Dean. At least that's what it felt like to you anyway.

Getting up you made your way to the shower, wiping at your face harshly. Dean would never feel the same way you felt about him. Still, that didn't stop the want, or the need to be close to him in more ways than just sex. Intimacy wasn't always about sex, and you craved more of him.

You don't know exactly when this depressed and down feeling started, but God you wished it would go away.

------------------------------------------

Two weeks went by as they usually do, and you still weren't able to shake that feeling. That hole in your chest, that loneliness. Dean hadn't tried to come into you again. Tonight though you knew he would because you were currently sitting in the back of the impala, having left the last hunt you just finished with the boys and headed back to Lebanon. Dean was all knotted up, you could see it in the way he held his broad shoulders as he drove. His eyes would shift back and forth from the rearview mirror to stare at you to the road. He didn't have to even say anything, you knew what he wanted, you just didn't know if this time you could do that for him.

You had felt so low, that you knew if you let yourself go there again, you'd never pick yourself up off the floor. The problem was you just didn't know how to tell him. Dean was your best friend, you didn't want to lose that at all. Even if you'd never be more than friends you needed him, just like he needed you. He was your crutch, and you were his. There was no way around it.

When the impala finally pulled into the bunker, and you all got out and threw your duffle bags over your shoulders. You made your way straight for your room, locking the door behind you, changing into one of Dean's oversized shirts that fit you more like a dress than a shirt, you crawled into your bed and covered yourself up.

You knew that Dean would just pick the lock. There were really no points in locks on doors when it came to living with hunters, it was just pointless. Still, it would slow him down, and hopefully deter him, maybe he'd think you were just asleep.

You lay there for no more than 30 minutes before you heard him try to open the door. When he saw it was locked he didn't even bother to knock. You could hear the distinct sounds of the lock being picked and the door swinging open. You laid there as still as possible as you felt the bed dip, and the covers pull back, letting you know Dean was sliding himself in behind you. He immediately starts to run his fingers up your thigh, burying his face in your neck as he kissed and nipped at the flesh there, not being at all shy about his intentions with the erection that was currently pressing against your ass.

"Y/N, Baby, I know you're not asleep," he whispers against the shell of your ear.

You didn't say anything. just rolled tighter into the covers and pressed him away with your hand. Dean sat there stiff as aboard, confused by your rejection. You had never once told him no before.

Reaching over Dean turns on the bedside lamp so that he could see you, checking to make sure you're not injured, and he didn't know about it. That was the only reason he could formulate at that moment that said you wouldn't want to be with him. He was more than a little hurt and looking for some sort of justification for your rejections.

Finally letting out a deep sigh you roll over and are met with a pair of very hurt looking green eyes staring back at you.

"Did I do something I don't know about?" Dean asked you, his voice tense, stress set deep in his shoulders.

The man thrived off of blaming himself for everything and you knew that. So you knew that you were going to have to talk this out with him, as much as you'd rather not.

"No Dean, you didn't do anything wrong, it's me. I'm just not in a good headspace right now," you tell him, rolling back over to face the wall.

Dean didn't leave like you were hoping that he would. Instead, he pulled himself closer to you in almost a spooning position, something he'd never done before.

"We all get down like that sometimes Y/N, this life is hard, but you don't need to push the people that care about you away, let me help you. Tell me what to do and I'll do it, but don't reject me and shut me out," Dean said, waiting for you to say something.

He didn't want to overstep his bounds, and he was still feeling the sting of being told no, so you knew he wasn't going to let this go easy.

You both just sat there in silence for a moment, neither of you saying anything. Dean was giving you some time to put your thoughts together. He could almost see the wheels turning in your head.

"Dean, I want you to answer me honestly about something. No matter how bad you think it might hurt my feelings or whatever," you said, turning to find him staring at you, concern etched deep in his features.

"Okay."

"Am I more to you than just an easy lay?"

The question seemed to throw him for a moment. All the things that he was expecting to come out of your mouth, that definitely wasn't one of them. He blinked at you a few seconds before realization sat in, and his features softened.

"Is that what you think? Y/N no, I don't see you that way at all. You're my best friend, you're the one that I share everything with. I have feelings for you that go deeper than that even. You know I'm not good with words, and I'm not really good at showing things, I never meant to make you feel like that. I've opened myself up to you more than I think I ever have with anyone. I need you baby, your not just an easy lay,"

Dean reached over and grabbed your hand in his, making little circles with his thumb, it was a small gesture, but even then it made your heart swell.

This is what you needed from him, closeness, intimacy. Not just sex.

"Every time you come in here and we have sex you just leave like I'm nothing. When we're not having sex you act like I'm a piece of furniture. You barely even acknowledge me. Dean If all this is ever going to be between us is an easy lay when you need to blow off some steam I don't know if we can keep doing this."

What you said seemed to have hit Dean hard, but so did the realization of what he'd been doing to you. Dean never was one for words, he never got it right, he always screwed it up getting it out. So he did the only thing he knew to do in that moment to keep you, because losing you was more than he could even fathom. He loved you and losing you would tear him apart.

Reaching over Dean grabbed your face and crashed his lips into yours. Kissing you slowly, tenderly, his tongue exploring your mouth in a way he never had, more care and love was placed in that one kiss than any you'd ever had in your life. By the time he released your face your world was a little fuzzy.

"Y/N, I love you, you are everything to me, I kept my distance because I don't want to freak you out, and make you run away from me. I thought all you wanted was a friend with benefits thing, but if you want more I'm all in for that too."

Laying down on his back Dean pulled your down with him. You slipped your head into the junction of his shoulder and neck, nuzzling down to fit your bodies perfectly together. like you were made for each other. Dean wrapped his arms tightly around you, half rolling onto his side caging you against him.

His body was warm against yours, you felt more safe and secure than you ever had in your life. This is it, this is what you were missing. Dean started to card his fingers through your hair, placing little kisses at random to your lips. Nothing was expected. Nothing was being pushed. He wasn't in a hurry. In fact it didn't look like he was going anywhere. He seemed perfectly content just to be, and that meant more to you than anything you had ever had in your life.

“I love you too, Dean, I always have,” you told him, your eyes are getting heavy. Exhaustion of all the emotions hit you all at once.

“I know Sweetheart, sleep, I’m not going anywhere,” he said, placing a soft kiss to your lips before settling back into his spot, playing with your hair, letting you nuzzle your face into him. You breathe in his scent deeply, letting it envelop you, and wash away all that hurt that you felt, leaving just him, your best friend, your rock, your comfort.

After about an hour while you were dozing asleep tangled up in his arms Dean was still playing with your hair, even though you had fallen into an easy sleep long ago. Dean laid there with his mind on things a hunter really shouldn't be thinking about. A home, a family, an apple pie life.

He wasn't dumb enough to ever dream that it would actually happen that way, but what you didn't know was that if he ever did get out of this life or he died in it, he wanted to do it right here, with his best friend. If he never got to do all those things normal people got to do, that was fine, he'd expected that a long time ago; but whatever he did get to do, as long as it was with you... Well... That was more than enough...

Tag List:

@deanwanddamons @imabitch4jensen @rvgrsbrns @bi-danvers0 @onethirstyunicorn @i-love-superhero @akshi8278 @alanegaming @magssteenkamp

#dean winchester #dean winchester fanfic #dean winchester fanfiction #dean winchester one shot #dean winchester smut #dean winchester x reader #dean winchester x you #dean x reader #dean x you #spn #spn smut #spn fanfiction #spn fic #spn one shot #jensen ackles #jawritter

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bbaronpiper · 4 years

Text

Moment of weakness pt.2

Hi guys! part 2 is here. I just wanted to say thank you all so so much for all the feedbacks, support, likes and reblogs for the previous part. It made my heart swell with joy. love you all! I hope you enjoy reading this as much as I did writing it. Please know that I tried to tone down the angst on this part. but failed. haha sorry, I’m a sucker for angst stories.

Anyway, heres part 1 if you haven’t read it yet.

Warnings: lots and lots of angst, cheating, swearing, use of drugs and writings of an amateur wanna-be writer.

GIF not mine ctto.

Arón x reader

Arón’s P.O.V

Loud music was blasting through the speakers as the crowd go crazy. Night out with the boys was always fun. And it is. But not for me at least not tonight. Guilt was drowning me. I was lost in my thoughts when I heard Miguel’s voice.

“Do you love her?” Miguel asked me out of nowhere. But I answered immediately. It was a no brainer question. “Si, I love her with everything in me” I said wholeheartedly.

“Who?” He raised an eyebrow. “Hermano, I never mentioned a name. Who were you thinking?” he said with a straight face. He knew about my unfaithfulness. Oh boy how he wanted to beat the shit out of me when he found out I was cheating on Y/N. I begged him not to say a word saying I should be the one to tell her. And I was really planning to. I just don’t know how.

“Y/N, of course. She’s my girlfriend” I meant it. I was really thinking of her when I answered Miguel’s question.

“Then why are you doing this to her?” Miguel pushed as if I wasn’t on the verge of a mental breakdown yet.

He had me speechless. This fucker. It felt like as if a truck on full speed ran over me, shift gear to reverse and ran me over and over again. “No more” I whispered to answer Miguel’s question.

It was supposed to be a one-time thing. A moment of weakness. The other woman, she, who-shall-not-be-named and I met on set. She was our make-up artist. Damn, Y/N even met her once when she visited me. There was no excuse to what I did or why I did it but that supposed to be a one-time thing became a bad habit. 4 months. I’ve been fucking her for four months and I swore every damn time that it was the last one. That we’ll stop. But I craved for her. Stupid.

But that’s over now. Tomorrow, I swear I will end it once and for all. I can’t do this to Y/N anymore. I love her too much. Fuck. I even bought her a ring. I want to spend the rest of my life with her, make up for all the mistakes I’ve done.

Sometimes, part of me just wanted to pretend I did nothing wrong, go on with life and not tell Y/N. I am scared as hell but she deserved better. I knew what the consequences might be but I owe her the truth. My hands are shaking I couldn’t even insert the fucking key on my door’s keyhole. “Joder!” I sigh frustrated.

Once I got in our apartment. All things went to shit. Everything was a blur. The next thing I knew, I was on the floor wishing a truck really just ran me over.

I lost her. Puta mierda. I lost her.

---

Hours turned to days, turned to weeks, turned to months. I don’t even know what the date today is. All I know is that I want to numb the pain. And what better way to do that than to turn to alcohol and drugs. I felt my body getting weaker everyday but I don’t give a fuck. What else am I gonna lose? Oh, that’s right. Nothing! Oh god, I don’t even know where she is right now. I tried to call her. I tried to look for her but nobody knows where she is. I really tried.

So here I am sitting on my bathroom floor drowning in sorrow, high as fuck. I feel awful but that doesn’t compare to the hurt I felt when she told me she was done with me. I keep on hearing her voice inside my head. I see her every damn time I close my eyes. Memories flooded in my brain. The way she looked at me with anger in her eyes. The pain and disappointment in her voice as she told me she knew for months. She’s been suffering alone for months. But I was too selfish to see it. If I just loved her properly maybe I would still have her.

I miss the warmth of her body. Her soft lips against mine. The way our bodies perfectly fit together when we’re making love. How she would always make my days better. She’s my rock, my everything, she kept me sane. I wished I realized this sooner before I hurt her as badly as I did.

Everything is spinning, my head hurts like a bitch.

---

Y/N’s P.O.V

You swore you’ll never be back here but you need to get the rest of your things. It’s been a month and a half in hell. You don’t know what to expect. Maybe he’s with her. You thought. Maybe he asked her to move in with him by now. But you couldn’t care less. It’s none of your business now. All you have to do was to grab your things as fast as you could and fly out the window.

You open the front door and slowly walked in like a thief, careful not to be seen nor heard. You went straight to the room you used to share with Arón. You felt a sting on your heart. You missed this. As you were grabbing your bags, you heard a small sound coming in the bathroom.

Fuck! He’s home. You panicked.

You don’t know what’s gotten into you but you felt like you have to check the bathroom and so you did.

As you entered, you saw him sitting on the cold hard floor with his back leaning on the wall for support. He had his eyes closed and looking so pale as the night you left him. It scared you for a while thinking he’s passed out or even dead. Until he stirred a little. You let out a sigh of relief.

You felt bad for him. Yes, he broke you, but still, you loved him once in your life and seeing him like this still had an impact on you. So, you kneeled in front of him. Held his face trying to get his eyes to open. “Hey, Arón?” you nervously said.

“No, no, no, god, no, por favor, no… Detener, hazlo parar.” (…stop, make it stop) he whispered. Eyes still shut closed.

You were confused. ‘til you looked around and saw empty bottles of alcohol. And what the fuck is that? Is that joint? And Pills? Oh, god. He mixed all of this? You thought to yourself. That’s when it clicked you. He thought he was hallucinating.

You got up to get a towel. You soaked it with cold water and wipe Arón’s face with it gently. Memories of you with him starts to creep in and you swore you wanted to run away. But you stayed.

“Arón” you tried speaking to him again. Shaking him a little. That’s when his eyes opened.

“Y/N,” he whispered. You barely heard him, he looked straight at you. “Bebé? Is it really yo.. are you really here?” he said as he reached out for you for confirmation that you really are there.

“Yes, I’m here. what did you do? What’s all this? How are you feeling?” you asked all those questions. Sounding more concern than you should be. As if you were still his girlfriend.

He just shrugged as tears start building up on his tired eyes. It took a while for him to answer “I missed you bebesita”

“I told you not to call me that” oh no, the anger you had inside you starts to resurface.

“I’m sorry. I’m so sorry for what I did. I-I.. just missed you s-so much. Duele mucho.” (it hurts so bad) He said. Finding it difficult to speak. Shutting his eyes again. Wincing in pain. Not because he felt like shit because of drugs and alcohol but because he felt your anger towards him.

“C’mon, let’s get you to bed so you can rest. I’ll make you some soup” trying to hold back tears. He will never see me shed a tear for him ever again. you thought.

You helped him up. Lead him to bed and when he lied down, he murmured “Gracias” as you wiped his face and torso with the towel you still have on hand. Gulping a little when you saw his bare torso. god! he’s beautiful. You snapped out of it and pull the covers up to cover him. Not today satan! You thought to yourself.

You look at his sleeping form for a few seconds. Indulging his appearance: his pouty lips that you oh so loved, his mini tattoos, his moles, his shaved head with his little curls starting to grow back, for one last time. As you wished this was really the last time you had to see him. You wanted to move on. You needed to move on. But as you turn around, he grabbed you by the wrist.

“Stay. Lay down with me. Por favor… at least just until I fall asleep” He begged looking at you. You can hear the pain and tiredness in his voice.

You just stood there dumbfounded not knowing what to do. “Please” you heard him repeat himself. That’s when you finally gave in. took off your shoes and got under the covers with him. Fucking satan’s not done yet. He got me this time.

You were laying on your back when he turned to you and put his head on your shoulder and wrapped an arm around you. And you let him. You let him. It felt like it was killing you over again but at the same time it brought you sanctuary. You don’t even know how that’s possible. But you missed this. You missed him.

Both of you were enjoying the moment in silence until he spoke softly “Y/N, I’m really sorry for all the pain I’ve caused you… if I could just turn back time you know I wou…” you cut him off.

“Shut up, Arón” your chin starts to quiver as you felt fresh tears starting to form. “Please. Stop it. I can’t...” you were the one begging now.

He obeyed you. Not a single word fell out of his lips. His breathing was steady and you could hear his soft snores signaling he’s already asleep. You carefully got out of bed. Then headed to the get the rest of the bags you came here for. You had already prepared them that dreadful night. And just as you were about to turn the doorknob to leave. You heard him speak in his sleep.

“She’s not worth it, Bebé”

And just like that. all the tears you held all day, burst. You covered your mouth with your hand and hurried yourself to get out of that room and closed the door. You slide down on it as you felt your legs got weaker while you cried your heart out. Fuck you satan, that one hurt like a bitch.

Oh, how the tables have turned. Now, you were the one on the floor, weeping.

-----

Note: That’s it guys! I was torn between a happy ending or this one. But since I’m an angsty biatch, I went for this one. And I’m not really sure if we are supposed to forgive someone who broke us like this. Anyway, before we get personal here, I want to thank ya’ll again for reading.

Also, I’m considering on making this a trilogy. Oorrr it’s better just to leave it like this. What do you think? Feel free to drop suggestions. Ciao! <3

---

UPDATE! READ PART 3 HERE

#aron piper #aron piper imagine #aron piper x you #aron piper fancfiction #elite #angst #aron piper imagines #aron piper x reader #ander muñoz

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wangxianfics · 4 years

Note

helloooo! have you read any fics where either of them are put in an arranged marriage to someone else but of course, end up with each other anyways? Thank you in advance, and I love your blog so much, it helps my hunt for more wangxian almost on a daily basis❤️💙

Hello nonny!

Here’s a “Non-Wangxian Arranged Marriage” masterpost with Wangxian as the endgame ship.

Please, read the tags to know between who the arranged marriage is. Also read the notes carefully as some of the fics are not purely Wangxian so that’s a heads up for everybody!

Burning Bridges by Keysmashed (12+K, Explicit)

(Arranged Marriage between WWX & LXC, Misunderstandings, Pining, Love Confessions, Emotional Sex) @keysmash

For many years, Wei Wuxian had been in love with Lan Wangji, craving what little attention he could get from the stoic young man. Dismissals and rejections never mattered until one last push made him believe he was never going to earn Lan Wangji's affection.

When a letter from Gusu arrived in Yunmeng asking for Wei Wuxian's hand in marriage for the First Jade of Lan, a broken-hearted Wei Wuxian accepted the proposal in hope of forgetting his first love.

*** WangXian Arranged Marriage AU, with a twist.

@keysmash

Almost, Almost Mine by minttcm (1+K, General)

(Arranged Marriage between WWX & LXC, Angst With a Happy Ending)

Lan Wangji does not know why it irks him so. Because the ring on his brother's finger was just too damn shiny and the preparations were too damn grand and his fiancé, oh heavens, his fiancé. He was too amazing for Lan Wangji's own good.

Brash and loud yet so tentative and calculating. His name was Wei Wuxian and he almost wishes his brazen behaviour would one day become his undoing.

But he is running out of days, as the wedding strikes near and he can tell that they don't love each other as much as he could love Wei Wuxian and yet nobody says a damn word.

Caught staring at his brother's betrothed on the dinner table, Wei Wuxian just had to notice. Wangji doesn't know why he smiles so coyly even then when he whispers such shameless, scandalous words.

"Staring at me? My, Wangji if only you were your brother."

It was just all too cruel. And he was too. -

Wei Wuxian is set to marry Lan Xichen and Lan Wangji finds himself more displeased than he'd care to admit.

the trophy boys from here to if and when by ThunderstormsandMemories (4+K, Teen)

(Arranged Marriage between WWX & NHS, Canon Divergence, Crack Treated Seriously)

in which Nie Huaisang and Wei Wuxian get friend-married for political reasons (but mostly to mess with people)

OR, “Probably just how amazing you are, and how jealous they are of you and your wonderful marriage,” Nie Huaisang said, patting Wei Wuxian’s cheek lovingly, because what was the point in being married to your best friend, partially for political reasons and partially to piss off stuffy people like Sect Leader Yao, if you weren’t going to be as obnoxious as possible just because you could get away with it.

Three Worlds, One Life by limedumplr (10K, Teen)

(Arranged Marriage between WWX & WQ, Angels & Demons, Pining, Fairytale AU)

Out of all the celestials, it figured that Wei Wuxian would lose his celestial robe to a human.

When news of this disaster spread, everyone in heaven talked. How could a god lose their robe?

But no one particularly cared that the miscreant Lesser God Wei Wuxian was missing. It was only natural that someone with no regard for the rules would get duped by a human. After a few months, heaven seemed to move on from this development.

Lan Wangji could not move on.

Rebound Betrothal by mondengel (1+K, Not Rated)

(Arranged Marriage between LWJ & JYL, Angst, Fluff, Humor)

Jiang Fengmian takes the opportunity of a broken betrothal to strengthen ties with Gusu Lan.

@mondengel

Necessary Alliances by lonesomewriter (3+K, General)

(Arranged Marriage between LWJ & JYL, Slight Angst)

After an arranged marriage is set with the Jiang and Lan families, Wei Wuxian steps in as a bride to save his sister from being forced into a loveless marriage.

@lonesome-writer

Neatly Arranged by thunderwear (46K, Teen)

(Arranged Marriage between LWJ & JYL, Hurt & Comfort, Pining)

Betrothed. Lan Wangji was six the first time he heard that word. He wasn’t quite sure what it meant, but his mother didn’t seem to like it, so he decided that he didn’t like it either.

Betrothed by lil_apple (13+K, General)

(Arranged Marriage between WWX & one of the Lan bros, A/B/O, Alpha!LWJ, Omega!WWX, Meet Cute)

Wei WuXian is in Gusu, not only to study but also to be courted by the Lan brothers and to choose one and get engaged. OR Where I keep the initial plot of Mo Dao Zu Shi intact but insert a bit of extra romance and protective Lan Wangji.

Locked Away by SilverPenGoldLetters (5+K, Not Rated)

(Arranged Marriage between LWJ & OFC, Post-Canon, Love Confessions)

“Which one of the Two Jades of Lan is getting married?” He tried to keep his voice calm, but it just came out cold and emotionless. He gritted his teeth, willing to regulate his breathing that was steadily becoming irregular and shallow.

“Ha … Hang … Hanguang-Jun …”

Two Months Married by mondengel (2K, Teen)

(Arranged Marriage between LWJ & OFC, Angst, Adultry, Divorce)

Lan Wangji was married to a fine woman of the Lan clan when a flute warbled out the song of his heart.

(LWJ is married to an OFC before WWX comes back.) @mondengel

The light of you will stay by Lakritzwolf (Mature, 46+K, WIP)

(Arranged marriage between LWJ & OFC, Angst, Hurt & Comfort, Implied Het Sex because Pregnancy, OFC, Original Child Character)

Lan Wangji lost everything, and has only himself to blame. What remains are the memories, and a little boy who Lan Wangji swears will never forget how to smile. He wouldn’t have fought, if it weren’t for him. He wouldn’t have tried to hold on, if not for the silent promise he made in the darkest moment of his life.

As much as he wants to be with Wei Ying again, his promise keeps him bound here.

After flogging, repenting, and seclusion, Lan Wangji faces the next ordeal, also designed to bring him back onto the right path: to give the Lan Clan legitimate heirs. He sees no point in resisting, and resumes his duty to sect and family with the same stoic acceptance that brought him through everything else.

He hopes that one day, kinder fates may reunite them again, and that Wei Ying will be able to forgive him. And until that day, he treasures the memories of a smile that is forever lost to him.

(LWJ is married to an OFC and also has a child with her.)

Marry Him, Not Me by Wuxian_Biscuit (8K, Mature)

(Arranged marriage between LWJ & JC, Royalty AU, Pining, Secret Relationship, Courting Rituals)

To bolster alliances, Prince Jiang Cheng has been arranged to marry Prince Lan Wangji. However, Jiang Cheng only has eyes for his already engaged older brother, Lan Xichen, and Lan Wangji for Jiang Cheng's knight and guard, Wei Wuxian.

@wuxian-biscuit

Unexpected by nanodayolo (68+K, Teen)

(Arranged marriage between LWJ & MXY, Princess and the Pauper AU, Impersonation, On the Run)

When the Lanling Jin sect runs into financial trouble, a marriage between the third son of LanlingJin, Mo Xuanyu, and the Second Jade of Lan, Lan Wangji is arranged. But before the two can even meet, Mo Xuanyu is kidnapped.

Wei Wuxian has to pretend to be Mo Xuanyu, all while spending time with Lan Wangji, while Mo Xuanyu tries to find his way back home with the help of the street smart Xue Yang.

None of them could have possibly foreseen the outcome.

#Anonymous #nonwangxianarrangedmarriage #arrangedmarriage #endgamewangxian #ask #masterpost

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sweetonmylove · 5 years

Text

The “Our Bromance Is Outta This World” KiriBaku AU Fic Rec List

So... I've lost count of how many fic rec lists I've put out now, but the reasons remain the same as when I first started. I just love finding THAT fic that makes me happy, makes me smile, makes life seem a little better, and I wanna share the shit outta them! I love sharing my admiration of the beautiful writers who have used their time and talent (for free), because after all, they are just as passionate as we are about the ships we choose to partake in. I would like to genuinely thank the 500+ individuals who have chosen to allow me to come across their feed with our mutual love and adoration of all things Kirishima Eijirou and Bakugou Katsuki related. To show my appreciation, here, please take this rec list and read to your hearts' content, just as I have <3 If AU’s aren’t quite your thing, please feel free to glance at past lists and look for the upcoming Random list!

In The Dark of The Night *E* ~ Arxaris (In Progress/8? Ch.)

Gladiator Kirishima, Emperor Bakugou, Aged-Up, Blood & Violence, Strangers to Lovers, Light Dom/Sub, Top Kiri, Bottom Baku

The one where Arx blows our minds with a gentle giant gladiator Kiri and a lusting Emperor Bakugou. Dudes, the fight scene is just whoa, and you can never go wrong with reading anything from this brilliant writer.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/20067655/chapters/47526529

It Will Find You Here *E* ~ Arxaris (8 ch.)

Aged-Up, Strangers to Lovers, No Quirks, Backpacker Bakugou, AirBnB Host Kirishima, Hurt/Comfort, Top Kiri, Bottom Bakugou, Panic Attacks, Praise Kink, Possessive Kirishima

Yes, I've rec'd this before, I know. Buuut have you read it yet?? If not, I highly recommend this for anyone who enjoys our boys in other settings with a steamy/angsty plot, great characterization, and a bonus chapter to end it all. Am I biased because it's Arx' work? No, I legitimately fell in love with this fic because it's so fresh and one of a kind.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/18848662

(Love Is) An Open Door *T* ~EnchantedEmmeline (12 Ch. and fucking worth it)

Modern Setting, No quirks, Aged-Up, Café Owner Bakugou, Firefighter Kiri, Barely there angst, Humor (Oh my god, so much), Fluff, Bakusquad members

If you want to laugh your ass off and fall in love with these two idiots all over, then this is a MUST read! I personally could not put this down. Bakugou gets drunk and winds up unknowingly trespassing into Kiri's apartment… Kiri winds up fawning over a sock that was left by Bakugou… hilarity, fluff, amazing characterization, I just-please read this!!

https://archiveofourown.org/works/15978500

At The Beginning (With You) *T* ~ EnchantedEmmeline (Part 2 of the above fic)

Modern Setting, No quirks, Aged-Up, Wedding, Humor, Fluff

This fic picks up shortly after (Love Is) An Open Door, to conclude the fluff and humor that is my cup of tea.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/16153397

Everglow *M* ~ Maplefudge ( In Progress 5/20 Ch.)

Fantasy, Freeform, Worldbuilding, Dragon Kirishima, Soulmates, Beautiful artwork by Se7en!!!

Speaking of re-rec'ing... have you started this journey with Maple yet? If not, I highly suggest you do! Maple is another incredible writer that just has some of the fluffiest, sweetest, greatest fics out there. If Dragons aren't your thing, she has many many other fics that you should check out! Maple is AMAZING and she took my Krbk fanfic virginity!

https://archiveofourown.org/works/19422127/chapters/46221091

Achromatopsia *T* ~ PurplePersnickety

Soulmates, Fluff, Pining, Mutual Pining

In which the true colors of the world appear when you touch your soulmate for the first time

https://archiveofourown.org/works/17832155

Top Of The List *T* ~ PurplePersnickety

Pro-Heroes, Roomates (Oh My God), Mutual Pining, Fluff, Getting Together, First Kiss

The one where Bakugou lists his favorite things. Super fluffy and sweet <3

https://archiveofourown.org/works/18469453

Manly Man Falls for Manliest Man *T* ~ Afuzzyowl (In Progress/9? Ch.)

Modern Setting, Aged-Up, Slice of Life, Developing Relationship, Pining, Actor Bakugou, Salaryman Kirishima, Kiri has a huge gay crush on Bakugou-what else is new?

Or the one where Kirishima meets his favorite actor Bakugou by chance encounter and real feels start to develop (for both of them)

https://archiveofourown.org/works/18310007

Mine *E* ~ Alienqueen42 for candy_cadet

Aged-Up, Pro-Heroes, Smut, Drinking, Jealousy, Est. Relationship, Use of the word slut, Rough sex

Where Bakugou gets hit on and Kirishima is jealous

https://archiveofourown.org/works/18200363

Welcome Home *T* ~ empyreansunflower

Aged-Up, Pro-Heroes, Long distance relationship, Est. Relationship, Marriage Proposal

Bakugou waits at the airport to welcome Kirishima back home

https://archiveofourown.org/works/18098600

Broken Bridges *E* ~ DeathBelle (14 Ch.)

Aged-Up, Pro-Heroes, Pining, They haven't spoken in 2 yrs., Very Minor Character Death, Sexual Content, Happy Ending

Kirishima moves back to Japan after working abroad for two years and he finds out that old feelings die hard.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/14888358

Obvious *T* ~ AmethystUnarmed

Aged-Up, Pro-Heroes, Secret Relationship?, Kidnapping, Minor quirk torture, Mild Hurt/Comfort, Angry Bakugou, Protective Bakugou

Everyone had suspicions that Kirishima and Bakugou were in a relationship but nothing concrete… until Red Riot is captured

https://archiveofourown.org/works/17606090

Done With Having Dreams (The Thing That I Believe) *T* ~Futurehearts

Aged-Up, Pro-Heroes, Est. Relationship, New Years Eve, Marriage Proposal

Fluffy goodness with a proposal!!

https://archiveofourown.org/works/17374442

Still Here *T* ~ IcyHotHeart

Aged-Up, Pro-Heroes, Angst w/a Happy ending

Kirishima takes a position in America and Bakugou is left waiting for him back home… Bakugou does not want to give up hope that the only man he had ever loved will return to him. Super super sweet ending and I promise, it is a happy one.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/20086867

Linger *E* ~ NightBronze

No quirks, Bar/Pub, Aged-Up, Strangers to Lovers, Bartender Kiri, Drummer Bakugou, Pining Kiri, Bathroom Sex, Getting to know each other, Implied Getting Together, Dirty talk, Top Kiri, Bottom Bakugou, Fluffy Ending

https://archiveofourown.org/works/15590841

Jealous (It's My Right To Be Hellish) *E* ~ Sheila_thetank

Aged-Up, Jealous Bakugou, Possessive Bakugou, Eventual Sex, Getting Together

Where Bakugou gets jealous of anyone talking to HIS Kirishima and things are sorted out

https://archiveofourown.org/works/18903370

Sweet Dreams Are Made of This *E* ~ Sheila_thetank

Aged-Up, Sharing A Bed, Friends to Lovers, First Time, Dirty Talk, Praise Kink

https://archiveofourown.org/works/17187371

Here Comes The Bride *E* ~ Obsessed_As_A_Coping_Mechanism (6? Ch.)

Supernatural AU, Vampire Kirishima, Bartender Bakugou, Blood, Biting, Self Injury, Mentions of Suicide Attempt because becoming a vampire takes a catalyst, Fluff, Angst, Smut, Includes Art from TheHappySunflower88

Shows as a work in progress, but it feels completed. This is a wonderful piece of work guys, and if you're into vampires and the like, you should check it out

https://archiveofourown.org/works/16462376

Red Riot Otaku *M* ~ Bryan

Aged-Up, Pro-Heroes, Obsession, Mutual Pining, Mutually Requited Love, Realization, Implied Sexual Content, Pillow Talk, Getting Together, Fluff & Humor, Includes Art from TheHappySunflower88

Basically Bakugou collects anything and everything Red Riot related and his secret obsession is discovered *gasps*

https://archiveofourown.org/works/17531618

King of The Kitchen *T* ~ Confuse_The_Queer

Restaurant AU, Strangers to Lovers, Getting Together, Chef Bakugou, First Kiss

https://archiveofourown.org/works/18091583

And My Heart Went Boom *T* ~ Slumber

College/University AU, Mechanic Kirishima, Motorcycle owner Kirishima, Bakugou crushes HARD, Pure Fluff

https://archiveofourown.org/works/12957423

Mission Accomplished *NR* ~ SoftWhispers_ColdGoodbyes

Aged-Up, Pro-Heroes, Tooth Rotting Fluff, Fluff w/o Plot, Idiots in Love, Warm & Fuzzy Feelings

Short and sweet~ The boys open their own agency together, but it doesn't feel quite complete yet, at least to Bakugou

https://archiveofourown.org/works/19428121

So Take My Hand… *G* ~ Pirateofhearts (Speightbrigade)

Est. Relationship, Perfectionist Bakugou, Marriage Proposal, Tooth Rotting Fluff

Bakugou proposes to Kirishima.. And it's so sweeet and soffft <3

https://archiveofourown.org/works/20100010

Role Model *G* ~ Claus_Lucas for Silver_Sterling

Aged-Up, Pro-Heroes, Est. Relationship

The boys return to Yuuei to discuss being Pro-Heroes with the new class 1-A Students. This is just tender and beautiful. A student asks Kirishima if it's manly for a man to love another man

https://archiveofourown.org/works/19782532

It Don't Bite- YES IT DO *T* ~ Wholesomeworm

No Quirks, Coffee Shops & Cafes, Dog Obedience school, Dog Trainer Kirishima, Bakugou crushes hard, Super fluffy and sweet, humor

Kiri trains dogs and Bakugou is stuck taking in his mom's dog for training

https://archiveofourown.org/works/19929556

As always, please be kind and share your love with the incredible authors who poured themselves into these works. Kudos are fantastic and shouting out your love & adoration literally feeds our beloved writers' souls… which in turn, helps inspire more of the tremendous fics we all crave!! Do yourselves a favor and read these, relish in the phenomenal creations , and *PLEASE REBLOG* (even if you've read these), as someone out there might not have and these writers deserve ALL the attention they can get!!

@arxaris @maplefudge @icyhotheartwritings

#kiribaku fic rec list #fic recs #ao3 kiribaku #kiribaku #Kirishima Eijirou #bakugou katsuki #kiribaku ao3 fanfic rec list #fanfic rec list

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pxjiminsi · 4 years

Text

Prettiest Smile

Chapter 2 from the Series : Before you go

Synopsis: Wanting to escape the unending criticism from your peers and parents about your life choices, you flew to L.A to figure out your life. On the same flight, you encounter an early debut, full of dreams, Bangtan Sonyeondan. Not knowing that that encounter will change your life forever.

Pairing: Jimin x reader, Taehyung x reader, Jin x OC, OT5 x reader platonic love

Fic Type: Slice of life au

Word count: 1.6k

Genre: slice of life, fluff, mild smut, and a healthy amount of angst

Warning: few cuss words

A/n: Hi! This will be my first BTS Au in tumblr, I’ll be also uploading my old works here! Friendly comments and criticism from my fellow writers and readers as I want to improve my writing further on. I hope you enjoy my series.

Updates are every week, or as fast as I can!!

“We have the whole house to ourselves for the week, so feel at home!” Soo Yun exclaimed as she threw you a water bottle from the kitchen, dehydrated from that 45-minute drive from LAX to her home. “We have so much to catch up on, how’re your parents? Thank God they let you go on this trip huh? How’s Jae? You’re already what? A year in a relationship?” Her questions were non-stop and as much as you missed her after so long, you’re not that excited to answer all those questions as the main reason you went to L.A is to get away from them and your life in Korea as far as possible.

“They’re all great.” holding a tight grip on your bag and with a smile on your face to avoid answering her bombarding question of how your life has gone downhill since you entered University. “I’m jet-lagged and I’d like to take a nap before we go out for lunch, can you show me where I'd stay?” “It’s upstairs, first door on your left! I’m going to take a shower, but call me if you need anything.” Soo Yun said as you disappeared carrying your luggage up the stairs. You plop in your bed sighing, finally realizing that you’re going to start your new life in this foreign country and no one’s going to help you but yourself. You doze off wondering when your life will begin.

“Y/n, y/n!” Soo Yun nudged until you half-opened your eyes “Your phone’s ringing non-stop! How can you sleep through that noise?” Still disoriented, you answer your phone “Hi please tell me you have my bag” You get confused if you’re still dreaming and wonder why someone is looking for their bag when you’re asleep the whole time. “Hello?? My group went back to the airport because I think we switched luggage. Mine’s in neon pink, please tell me you have it?” You almost fell out of bed and rushed to see the tag on your bag, “Kim Seokjin?” you whispered out of confusion. “Yes, that’s me, and you’re y/n, right? Can we meet to exchange luggage? We can meet somewhere public, I'm not a bad person, I promise I just need to get my stuff back” you can hear his desperation in his tone, but he snickered when he heard you groaning your brains to your pillow from your stupidity back in the airport.

“Yes, of course, I need my stuff back too. We can meet at Shake shack in Hollywood blvd. I’ll be there in 30 mins.” impulsively suggesting as you’ve been craving burgers since you saw shake shack on your way here and Soo Yun’s planning to get lunch anyway. Hearing this Kim Seokjin’s angelic voice, maybe it’s safe to meet him. “What will you be wearing?” he asked, but you bet he didn’t think his question through “I mean of course to recognize you, I didn't mean anything bad with that, I'm sorry” he panics. How cute. “I don’t think it matters because of our matching bright neon pink bags, we might go blind if we see each other” you sarcastically said, being equally embarrassed with your bright luggage. You heard his laugh and you immediately softened. “Okay, see you in 30 mins.”

You run to the bathroom to wash your puffy face from your 2-hour nap, put light make-up on, and brush your hair. “Wow, first day in L.A and I'm going to get kidnapped… by a man who loves neon pink” questioning his taste while putting on your oversized black denim jacket with your white crop top and high-waisted shorts. First of all, you didn’t have a say when your parents bought that luggage in a sale at the mall and that’s the only luggage you have big enough to bring almost all your life away from Korea. “Soo Yun, I’m ready, let's go.”

It's been 10 minutes since you and Soo Yun arrived at shake shack, almost wanting to switch restaurants for their unbelievably overpriced burgers and fries. You glance at your friend and she seems to not be bothered by it. Maybe after 5 years of being in the states, capitalism will take over you. Succumbing to your growling tummy, you order the cheapest burger and fries meal. You devour your fries like there is no tomorrow while you almost choke on your coke at the sight of Park Jimin entering the restaurant together with Jeongguk and their friend whom you’re not familiar with, dragging your bag.

Jeongguk saw you and pointed in your direction. Your heart almost dropped at the sight of Jimin, thinking that you had seen the last of him in that plane and you’d just see him reach his dreams on television. A huge smile appeared on his face when he saw you, almost sprinting to get to your table with Jeongguk behind him. “It’s only been a few hours you missed me that much huh?” He looks at you then proceeds to wave his hands to the roaming eyes of his friend. The fact that you’re happy to see him again was written all across your face, but you tried your best not to show it as it may stir feelings inside you and confuse Soo Yun. She’s already baffled at why you’re already friends with people, good-looking people you may add, you mismatched bags with. You gave her an I’ll explain it to you later look as she nodded bewildered and continued with her food.

“Jin-hyung, I found the culprit.” Pointing at you while seating at the empty seat in front. Seeing that you made this man who looks like an angel, by the way, struggle with your luggage made you feel sheepish. “Finally we meet. I'm sorry for the hassle I have caused you. I’m Kim Seokjin” He brushed his hair up while catching his breath. “No, I'm sorry, I should've paid attention that I took the wrong bag at the airport.” you try to avoid Jimin’s stare as you pull your luggage to your side switching with Jin’s “I’m y/n and my friend, Soo Yin” you both held your hands as he reached for them to shake.

“What’s in that bag anyway? It’s so heavy.” Jeongguk asked, taking a fry in your tray and popping it in his mouth. You falter at his question, uh my whole life in Korea is in that bag and I don’t intend on coming back if I can. “Just a lot of clothes.” You shrugged focusing on the cars passing by outside. Jimin sensed that Jeongguk’s question made you uncomfortable. “Let’s go now, everyone’s waiting in the car” he gets up as Jin and Jeongguk said and waved goodbye to you and Soo Yin. “Good luck with your training, I’ll make sure to watch your videos on the internet” Soo Yin stood up waving at Jin and Jeongguk looking so mesmerized by the two. They waved back for the last time before disappearing outside. “Can I talk to you for a sec?” Jimin held his hand but you just nodded overlooking his help and signed at your friend that you’ll just be gone for a minute.

“I didn’t know I'd get the chance to see you again,” he said almost whispering. You’re not looking at him so you can’t tell, but you can hear the nervousness in his voice “Well, I think you knew we’d see each other again because you didn’t tell Jin that we knew each other and that I got his bag by mistake.” calling his bullshit as you take a peek seeing a smirk forming in his lips knowing he’s enjoying this. “Okay, okay” he held both of his hands up surrendering to you, slightly laughing. “But this feels like fate, don't you think so? I would very much like to have your number. I’d get it from your suitcase or Jin-hyung but it doesn’t feel very gentlemanly if I did that without your permission.” You look up to him this time. Giving you a glimpse of his sincerity and timidity you didn’t see before.

You debate to yourself whether to give in because it’s him. For the first time in a very long time, your heart fluttered again. You laughed again. You didn’t sleep tired from crying. For the first time, someone listened to you without pity. You felt like yourself again. He made all that happen in just a few hours. You began to ponder if you do believe in fate. Is this what fate feels like?

Thinking about all the possibilities, but you already had an answer in your mind.

“No, I have a boyfriend back home.” What you said is true, but why does your heart feel like it’s breaking. You see the way his face twitches, feeling guilty if he feels like you lead him on. “Oh, I didn’t know, I’m sorry.” sounding like a wounded puppy, you endure the temptation to pull him closer and hug him after hearing his tone. “I have to go, they’re waiting for me in the car.” For the first time, it’s him avoiding your eyes. He turned around and started to walk. You don’t say anything. You don’t have to, you just stare at his back wondering if you made the right decision. He stopped walking and turned to meet your gaze “You know, your boyfriend is very lucky to have you. Please support us in the future” He smiles the prettiest of smiles, then he’s gone.

#Before you go #jimin imagine #JIMIN SMUT #jimin angst #kim namjoon #kim seokjin #min yoongi #jung hoseok #park jimin #Kim Taehyung #Jeon Jungkook #BTS #Namjoon #Seokjin #Yoongi #Hoseok #Jimin #Taehyung #bts imagines

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noodlecupcakeswritings · 4 years

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With A Heavy Heart - Chapter 1 (A Kylo RenxCora fic)

The long awaited sequel to A Call to the Light. Cora and Ben's relationship is non existent after Ben murdered his father but with Cora being pregnant, Bens trying his hardest to make things work. It's not as easy as he would have liked.

I'm so sorry this took me forever to write, but with how bad TLJ was it really put me off writing this for a while. Needless to say theres gonna be some big differences in this fic. Please leave comments, kudos and reblogs if you like it. It really helps me out as a writer, lemme know if you wanna be on the taglist as well :)

Warnings: Language, Violence, Angst, Physical abuse

Chapter 1

Kylo’s P.O.V

Another day of silence from Cora. We’d barely spoken since I’d unburdened myself from one parent. And that had been four months ago. Some days we didn’t even see each other due to how busy The Supreme Leader kept me. Her belly had begun to swell noticeably, we wouldn’t be able to hide her pregnancy for much longer. If she was still suffering from discomfort or morning sickness, I had no idea, she kept it all so secretive. I wanted to be there for her, I wanted to help but I couldn’t force her to accept my help. I wanted us to be happy again, for us to look forward to starting a family. Even if the thought of being a father terrified me.

I was finally freed of my duties for the day and returned to our room. Cora was preparing for bed, her nightgown stretching awkwardly over her stomach. It was obvious it was starting to get too small now. She didnt even spare me a glance as she folded her clothes neatly by the foot of the bed. I offered her my hand to help her up, but she ignored it, using the bed to stand herself up. I sighed, her stubbornness was growing more frustrating. She manoeuvred past me to the bathroom so she could clean her teeth. I followed after her like a lost puppy, craving communication and affection from her. “Cora would you please talk to me,” I snapped. She spat the toothpaste out before standing back up straight, she glanced at me in the mirror.

Cora turned in my direction but again side stepped past me without a word. This time I wasn’t going to accept her silence. I grabbed her wrist, stopping her from leaving the room. She froze, her free hand instinctively going to her swollen belly as if to protect our child. I swallowed hard, it hurt to know she feared I’d hurt her or our unborn child. I wanted to let her go so she wouldn’t fear me, but I wanted her to communicate with me more. “Please,” I pleaded. I loosened my grip on her wrist a little, she could slip free easily if she wanted. My hand around her wrist was the most contact we’d had in months. And yet it felt…violent. I felt guilty being so rough with her. Perhaps I really did break everything I touched. Finally she turned to me, but I noticed how she couldn’t quite look me in the eye. She pulled her wrist free from my grip.

“What do you want to talk about?” She asked, her tone filled with sarcasm. I didn’t think I’d get this far and now I had no idea what to say. She stood there, getting more irritated at every second that passed. I had to think of something fast before I lost my only chance. “Are you okay? You and the baby?” I asked. Her irritation faded but she was still tense and on edge, still defensive. “We’re fine,” she answered. I could tell from her body language that she was done. She was going to drop the conversation there and go to bed. I had to keep this going. “Your sure? There's nothing I can help with?” I asked. “Oh you’ve done enough,” Cora spat.

I sighed, now it was my turn to want to walk away. I knew exactly what she meant by that. Killing my father hadn't been easy but it’s not like I could take it back now. I took a step to head out of the bathroom, but Cora put her hand out to block my path. “You wanted to talk, why are you trying to walk away?” Cora asked. I took a step away from her, trying to keep calm. I didn’t want to argue with her, it wouldn’t be good for the baby. I wanted to keep her as stress free as possible. “You don’t want to talk about how you murdered your own father, our child's only grandfather,” she snapped. “No, I don’t. I wanted to talk about you and the baby,” I explained calmly. “This is a conversation we need to have whether you like it or not.”

I shook my head, “no, not right now. We can talk about it later when your less...at risk.” “At risk? Of what? Losing the baby from stress. You’ve done a great job at keeping me stress free so far. The father of my child murdered his own father, he also nearly got himself killed in the process. He's also trapped me here on enemy territory where everyone here wants to see me and my child dead, including your dear supreme leader.” “You’re not trapped here,” I insisted. “I’m not? So you'd let me go if I asked you too?” I stayed silent, she knew the answer to that, and I hated that she was right about this. Cora smirked and crossed her arms over her chest as she realised this.

“So you’d take my child away from me, halfway across the galaxy away from its father where you could turn them against me?” I asked. “You’d do that yourself.” “What’s that meant to mean?” “That eventually it would see you how everyone else sees you, how I now see you. A monster.” I felt a wave of conflicting emotions from her words. I needed to leave before I did or said something I would regret later. Cora’s eyes had filled with tears at this point as if this were hard for her. “So what? Your saying you don’t love me anymore?” I asked, afraid of her answer. “There’s nothing left of Ben Solo to love. I never should have come back for you.”

I pinned her against the bathroom wall, my hands against her shoulders. She whimpered, her hands going to her swollen belly once more to protect the child inside. My anger had gotten the best of me once more, I could see the fear in Cora's eyes, and I hated myself for it. But it was too late to take it back. I let go of her, taking a few steps back to put some distance between us. Cora remained where she was, afraid anything she might do or say could set me off. Tears rolled down her cheeks, but she made no sound to voice her anguish. “I'm...I'm sorry,” I murmured

I reached out, trying to take her hand in mine, to plead with her to take it back but she stepped out of reach. She retreated into the bedroom, signalling the end of the conversation. I swallowed hard, there was nothing I could say or do to make this situation better. I knew I should admit defeat now before I hurt myself more. Could she not sense how the action of killing my father had broken me even more? I regretted it, I couldn’t stop thinking about it. I should have left with him, left everything behind so that I could be happy. Cora and I would have been happy together, happy to start a family together.

If I could take it all back I could. But it was too late for that. perhaps it was too late for Cora and I as well. Perhaps she was right. I exited the bathroom, glancing at her as I headed for the door. She was in bed, turning off the lights. I left our room, giving her the space she likely wanted. I’d sleep somewhere else for the time being. I needed to stop my rage getting the better of me, I didn't want things to become worse.

Taglist: @sweetfictionalworld, @belathora, @sarahlee8793, @cltex84, @momobaby227, @jana-banana-fana, @xxstarwalker, @siobhanlovesfilm, @dark-night-sky-99

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fyrapartnersearch · 4 years

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Seeking Literate and Dedicated Partners!

Hello, you can call me Doe! I’m in my 20s, a small business owner, and a proud cat mom. I write multiple paragraphs/novella style (200-500+ words). I love to write detailed descriptions and delve into a character’s head/emotions as well as surroundings. I compare it to writing a novel together. I understand if the scene doesn’t have alot going on and therefore requires less like rapid fire. I adore having long, thoughtful replies where we truly immerse ourselves in the world. I’m hoping to find a partner whose as enthusiastic and passionate about the plot and writing as I am. When I get invested in a story, it’s 100% dedication. Getting a reply is the highlight of my day. I’m a big fan of romance and using face claims. I’m the type to make pinterest boards, spam you with gifs, headcanons, and send you songs that remind me of our characters and/or ship. I’ll get excited if we come up with future plot ideas, or if our characters are being cute or angsty and I can yell about it in the chat. Last but not least I only do MxF (with myself in the female role) and don’t double, but I’m more than happy to write side characters of either gender to help move the story along. I’d highly prefer female authors writing male characters. Male authors, please stop contacting me. I’ve been burned too many times. If you persist, I’ll ignore your message. Sorry! Desperately Searching For - 21+ partners - For you to have an excellent grasp of grammar, punctuation, spelling, and capitalization. Both in character and out of character. (Literate to advanced writers only, please. I’m not looking for newbies). - Plot before smut. While mature themes will be in my plots, and are even encouraged, there needs to be a good chemistry between our characters. I like to have a good mix of plot and tastefully written smut, along with doses of angst and fluff. - For you to write as an older male (40s+/50s+). I’m a sucker for the gruff and tough men who secretly have a soft heart. I also love those grumpy, hypermasculine men being intimidated by darling, soft yet commanding, and pretty women. - The more description, the better! I’m looking for someone who can write as much as me (2 to 4 paragraphs or more) and really bring the story to life. I lose interest if I’m the only one that’s invested/enthusiastic or coming up with plot ideas. Quality writing makes my heart happy, as does world building together. - The use of real life face claims and joining me in the wonderful world of ship/character development is an added bonus that makes me even happier, but it’s not requirement. (I won’t use anime faces, only realistic art if you’re uncomfortable with real life) If you’ve made it this far, thank you! You won’t be disappointed in writing with me. I tend to be online daily and while I’d like it if you were too, I understand that real life things comes first. Please let me know if you’re going to be inactive, I’m in this for the long term. If you suddenly stop replying ic and ooc, I’ll drop the story after 2 weeks to a month. Below are genres and pairings I love. Feel free to combine as many as you’d like and I’m sure we can come up with something great! Current cravings are in bold. One thing I don’t do is slice of life. I write to escape reality, not return to it XD Genres: - anything mafia related - crimes in remote locations - small towns and supernatural happenings - post apocalyptic/dystopia - supernatural/modern fantasy (A/B/O, werewolves, shapeshifters, monster x hunter) - southern/mid western gothic - murder mystery (small town or big city) - modern/dark fairy tale retellings - sci-fi (star wars inspired / tetraphilia (alien x human) - cyberpunk/retro-futuristic - little coastal towns or little towns in the mountains - emotionally charged/dark and gritty - superpowers/gifted - unresolved sexual tension/slow burn - mythology (modern / hades x persephone) - redemption - pacific northwest - suburban gothic - luring to the other side - reincarnation/multiple universes - western inspired + modern day (such as longmire) Pairings: - age gaps (older man x younger woman. youngest I write is mid 20s) - enemies to lovers/villain x heroine - cop x criminal - doctor x patient - friends turned lovers/pining - grumpy x sunshine - the broken man x the woman that becomes his light - fbi agents/cop partners - dark hearted man melting for the innocent woman - friend x best friend’s older sibling - boss x employee - neighbors - firefighter/cop x victim - mentor x mentee - hurt/comfort - height differences - pet names (sweetheart, baby girl, kid, kiddo) - lady and the tramp esque/class difference - creature x human - ex-con x anyone - bodyguard x assignment - widow/er falling in love again - biker x civilian - rancher/mountain man x city girl - affair - hitman x target - serial killer x fbi agent - soul mates - experienced x inexperienced - local x vacationer - injured/scarred warrior washed out from their former glory x royal/heir-to-be - friend x best friend/boyfriend’s father - daughter in law x father in law - park ranger x camper - bounty hunter x bounty Tropes/Themes: the papa wolf/hot dads, cultured badass, jerk with a heart of gold. ladykiller in love, mountain man, mysterious protector, southern gentleman, tall, dark, and handsome, knight in sour armor, red string of fate, villain takes an interest, porcelain to ivory to steel tiny women and big men, the monster being treated gently for the first time in his life, two characters forced into positions where they have no choice but to reconcile their differences and grow together/trust each other, forbidden relationships Fandoms: (I don’t write canons) Star Wars, X Files, Haven, Fringe, Stranger Things, Heroes, The Wolf Among Us, Mercy Thompson Series, True Blood, Marvel, The OA, Disney (personified), His Dark Materials, Beastars, Horizon Zero Dawn, The Last of Us Plot Ideas: - Human Man x Gifted Woman / stranger things inspired - Hitman x Civilian / modern supernatural + human x werewolf - I almost never ask this as it feels self-indulgent but I finished the Last of Us 2 and have a mighty need to write against Joel with an original character of mine. I just love him so much. Last but not least, I have a list of kinks if anyone’s interested. I use email and discord to write. I’d also be open to joining a jcink site! Contact me at [email protected] or Doe#3347 on discord. Please be detailed when you message me, let me know why you chose to contact me. Seeing only “hey do you wanna rp?” is a guaranteed way to turn me off. Look forward to hearing from you!

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luckyukhei · 6 years

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Brooke’s Birthday Special!

Today ( or the day this will be posted ) is my 16th birthday! I wanted to show some of my favorite writers some love for the occasion! These writers works have done the following:

inspired me

had me reading their whole series in one night

helped me forget my problems with the story

all of the above

I am so proud of how great they are doing and I want to recognize them and my favorite works of theirs. I want to talk about a few things so yeah! I’m sure these people don’t particularly need a shout out from me but, they definitely deserve recognition. Summaries are in italics! Comments on the series/work are in bold. Let’s get started hoes.

If you got a

@spookyhyuckie : from what I now personally Leyla is such a beautiful person inside and out. She works really hard and I’m really proud of her.

La Vie En Rose: La Vie follows flower shop worker Y/N, her mutual crush on bookstore worker Jungwoo, and her best friend’s hard work on trying to get them together. La Vie was such a cute and soft story. Definitely a story for someone craving tons of fluff with a few dashes of angst. It was super cute and how I met one of my best friends. It’s great for a romantic! latest masterlist link

Stoned: Stoned is about Y/N falling in love with a stoner! Haechan and vice versa. Although he doesn’t seem too appealing when he cures his munchies at her dinner. Stoned is really funny and I loved it. I’ve seen a lot when it comes to stoners and as someone who’s sober versus some of my friends, I found it pretty relatable. masterlist link

@whitelalin / @jenoptimist : She is the sweetest thing and is so under fucking rated and I will fight over that

Mused: Mused is about an up and coming band that Y/N’s best friend really stans. Well, Y/N may or may not become the band manager. She also may or may not be falling with band member Taeyong. This text series is so underrated. It is definitely a favorite of mine. There aren’t really many text series with Taeyong x reader and it’s some good shit.

@softjenohours : she is an amazing writer and a really hard worker oml

Money Talk: Rich boy Jaemin needs a job and daughter of the owner of a bookstore needs employees. Y/N can’t help but, give the rich boy a hand to hold. Okay, look. There are a l o t of Jaemin text series but, the amount of raw emotion and the comparison between a good person and a toxic one along with the showing on how to deal with it makes this particular one stand out.

@wowlele : she’s got a bunch of NCT related works and she was so nice to me when I let her know about my special. She’s really great.

The Mystery Begins: Chenle believes he’s never going to find his soulmate and when he finally does the weird shit that happens in the town needs be investigated by the Scooby Doo Gang Dream Team I really love what she has for this so far and I think it has so much potential! I hope she comes back to it soon!!

@camcamlovesbangchan : Cam is so supportive. Becoming friends with her has made such an incredible in pact on me. She has so much untapped writing potential and I can’t wait for a full-length series. She doesn’t have a specific series for you to binge so I’m just gonna give you her

@trouvaeh / @fangwoo : She's a big ol sweet heart and I can't help but fangirl she likes my stuff and includes me oml.

You; Me; We’re Contradictory: Y/N is a bad bitch that has the voice of an angel and even though the cigarette smell threatens to ruin Renjun’s reputation. Seems like a part of Renjun is falling for her bad girl charm. Both of these have a whole heap of potential! I’m ready to see more of this! Hopefully, we will.

Muse and the Blues: Y/N should know taking pictures of people without consent is illegal but, if illegal means a cute boy getting her number lock her up. So what I said for the first one still applies here. Also? Yuta? My mans?

@wereseoyoung she’s unbelievably funny and smart oml.

Starstruck: Yuta is a soccer player that happily agreed to help his former college but, he would be a lot more helpful if he stopped flirting with the team manager. This made me fall in love with Yuta even more ahhh.

Sunrise: Moon Y/N is the sweetest ball of sunshine it’s hard not to realize you smile when you see her. Johnny is no exception to that but, in more than in a platonic little sister way. Can Johnny stop being a pussy and ask her out? The world may never know. Honestly, the night I read this I was rolling around in my bed and giggling! It’s super romantic and sweet and I love a good Johnny fic.

Prima: Y/N is the daughter of the best ballerina to ever grace her college campus and everyone expects Y/N to follow in her footsteps. But, Y/N’s feet don’t seem to fit and there this really cute guy that dances too. He’s a Ten out of ten. The character development in this one is textbook but, amazing oml.

@hobiwonka / @2seoksolostan : She's very helpful and has helped me with ideas for Close To Heaven Closer to Hell. She has so many great stories and you need to read all of them. Seriously there will be a quiz

@guksthighs : You want some thicc ass stories? And cool af aus? Definitely the place. She's amazing at aus and such a nice person. She's a hard worker and definitely deserves a lot of praise.

@hazelhours she’s so awesome?? And like she makes her schedule. She updates when SHE wants to and honestly, we support an independent queen.

Spiked Out: Volleyball player, Y/N, joins the newly co-ed volleyball team but, something in Yukhei makes him dislike her presence. Lucas is so mean in this one and it makes me sad because Lucas is the love of my life buttttttt it’s amazing! The sudden switch of emotion gave me whiplash but, it was great.

@cappletini is based in the Marvel fandom and I've known her for years. She has amazing ideas and stories so if you're in the mood for some angsty super heroes that's definitely where you should go..

@w1nko

Naive: Johnny has had a crush on Y/N for a while but, as everyone seems to have established, Johnny is a pussy boy so, when he recruits his friend Jaehyun for help. Jaehyun is seemingly the next victim of Y/N’s unintentional heart stealing. I am so excited about this love triangle oml.

@jjkscafe

Empty Apartment: Twitch Streamer Jungkook is in need of a new roommate that is not dead and will actually pay rent, unlike Stanley. But, when Y/N notices the weird things going on she makes Jungkook help her with the mystery. So there isn’t anything romantic but, it makes up for it with the best crackheadedness I think I’ve ever read. Remember kids ghosts love gin.

@pjmlog she doesn't have very many up but, oh goodness she is so good and deserves a lot more recognition. She has a bunch of potentials and I'm so ready for it to shine.

@violetvelvvets

Red Lips: Y/N is a really good makeup artist they may have ended up flipping burgers if her model friend, Taeyong didn’t hook her up with a fresh new model named, Jung Jaehyun. Give me more please and thank you. There have been about 5 parts and they’re pretty good!

@mangodoyoung

Puzzle: Jaemin is deeply infatuated with Y/N’s best friend and although Y/N has a massive crush on him she just can’t help but, assist him in winning her best friend over. This one frustrated me due to the small little things that could’ve been fixed if the cOMMUNICATED AHHH but, it did that in an amazing way.

@taechubs

The Labyrinth: Jimin Park ending up on Y/N’s doorstep bloody and needing of help would unravel threads of connections not only to each other but, also to Jimin’s place in the mafia. This fic sparked my love for gang aus again and it was amazing. There are 50 parts and I read most of them in one night!

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jinterlude · 6 years

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Two Faced (Ch.3)

➵ Pairing(s): Gang!Jungkook x Female!OC & Gang!Mark Lee x Female!OC x Gang!Seokjin

➵ Genre(s): College!AU, Mafia/Gang!AU, Angst, Romance, Friendship, Humor, Love Triangle & Slight-Fluff

➵ Warning(s): None for this chapter

➵ Words: 4.2K

➵ Co-writer: @softjeon

➵ Summary: Two girls. Two gangs. One craved absolute control over the city of Seoul. While, the other simply craved sleep and good grades. Now, what do these two ladies have in common? Simple. They have nothing in common—or so they think. Everyone knows the saying, “never judge a book by its cover”, so maybe there is something more to these two than meets the eye…especially when one of them is suddenly thrown into the underground life. Loyalties will be tested. Romance will blossom. Yup. Sounds like an average college day…

« Previously | Next Time »

Chapter 3 - One Step Closer

Sowon stared at the woman, who currently clutched her arm. She raised her brow, wondering what should her next course of action be. She could try and convince Sumin to release her as that there's nothing in the world that could harm her or she could simply take her worried roomie with her.

Yeah…

Right now. The latter looked better as it required little to no effort on her part.

“Oh, yes you can…,“ Sowon simply stated and put her hand onto Sumin’s arm, caressing her sweetly before her hold tightened and then tried to push the younger girl off her. But it was no use. The younger woman was really determined to not let go and let her roommate run into any more trouble.

“You’re going to get hurt!” Sumin exclaimed in a panicked tone, “Let’s just call the security! I can’t let you get into trouble…” Sowon turned to look over her shoulder, as she sighed loudly. How sweet of her roommate to think she would run headless into danger.

“Oh, sweet sunshine,” Sowon patted her friends head, who still had her arms wrapped around Sowon’s body tight to keep her from going further. “Well, then…there’s only one way, right?” She stated with a cheeky smile, making Sumin loosen her hold as she looked up the older.

Did she really think she would give up that easily? Pretending to go back inside, Sumin finally let go of her completely and just when the younger turned a little Sowon took the chance and quickly wrapped one arm around her waist. The other shot up to her mouth, just like she had done a couple of minutes ago.

“Then you have to come with me,” Sowon pulled the other girl with her, chuckling at Sumin’s attempts to escape her grip. It was quite the act to pull the girl out of the window and without falling off the short ledge. It took all of Sowon’s strength to keep Sumin’s balance and bring her over to where you could easily walk on the roof and where it definitely was safer as well. Only then she’d let go of the younger one.

Running towards the edge, Sowon let the wind blow through her hair as she closed her eyes. That’s what freedom felt like. Rolling her shoulders back, Sowon’s whole demeanor suddenly changed. She felt stronger. Fierce. The night was her companion again.

“Are you coming or nah?” She smirked at her roommate who had her arms flung around herself, shivering in her cute, fluffy looking pajama.

Short whines left the poor girl’s lips. The night air caused shiver after shiver as nothing but the thin fabric from her pajamas provided her warmth. Sumin rubbed her arms, hoping that the fast friction would create enough heat to make her body stop shuddering.

Her innocent stare remained on her roommate. Correct. It remained on the stranger as Sumin no longer recognized the older woman that had this mischievous smirk painted on her face. No longer was she this lazy, rude, obnoxious person that she called her roomie. No. Now, in front of her eyes, was Sowon. This confident, scheming, seductress that had anyone and everyone eating out of the palm of her hand. Sumin observed how the seven fellas behaved around Sowon. It was they were merely her followers, and she was their queen. Their leader.

Interesting…

“So, are you coming or not?!” shouted Sowon again, pulling Sumin out of her thoughts and totally ignoring the fact that people were sound asleep.

Sumin’s lips pursed as a few groans could be heard. Her eyes practically became slits. Maybe Sowon was still this rude person. She apparently had no regard to the fact that it was currently almost three o’clock in the fucking morning.

The conflicted woman contemplated the idea of going after her. Someone had to keep an eye on Sowon.

“Okay, fine! I’m coming with you, but only because I just want to make sure what has got you sneaking out at odd hours of the night, and is apparently making you neglect your academics!” yelled Sumin, slowly taking a step on the roof tiles. She just had to have a small fear of heights…

Sowon shook her head with an amused grin. Her poor little sunshine.

“Just take it one step at a time. Seeing how you’re only wearing those bunny slippers, I don’t want you falling to your death.” She advised as walked towards the drain pipe with little to no difficulties. Sowon then positioned one foot against the edge of the roof while the other lowered itself and rested against the wall. She slowly lowered her body, making sure that her hands were secure against the pipe before lowering the foot, that rested against the ledge. With a deep breath, Sowon slid down the pipe; the speed fueled the adrenaline rush that pumped throughout her veins. She continued to slide until her feet landed on the grass.

Sumin looked completely flabbergasted as she watched Sowon disappear. Wait...did Sowon say she could fall to her death?!

Great...if her fear of heights weren’t already horrific, her kind roommate just had to paint that “lovely” image into her head.

With a deep breath and few whines, Sumin slowly walked towards the drain pipe, thanking the stars that the school had rather sturdy pipes. Her entire body trembled the more she walked towards the ledge. She could honestly feel her legs ready to give out on her.

“Just don’t look down!” exclaimed Sowon, giving her roomie a boost confidence.

Sumin whined once more, “Thanks for the advice!”

The scared girl crouched down and practically tip-toed towards the pipe. She peeked her head over the ledge, and while the dorm had only three floors, the distance between the her and the ground seemed ginormous.

The rate of her heart sped up to the point that she felt like she ran a marathon. Her breathing became sporadic. Both her fingers and legs trembled in fear. “Okay...you got this...just don’t think about it…” Sumin mumbled to herself as she slowly positioned herself to slide down as well, “Oh...I’m gonna die…”

Meanwhile, with Sowon, she honestly couldn’t help but worry for her little sunshine. Part of her feels bad for forcing Sumin into coming along, but at the same time, it was her own damn fault for being a caring roomie.

“Should one of us catch her in case she falls?” Sowon heard Taehyung ask.

Sowon hummed in response, debating if they could afford having someone, with a broken leg, arm, and/or wrist, tag along.

“Yeah...I guess…,” She then turned her attention towards her members, “Any one of you would like to volunteer?” She asked, smiling a little too sweetly.

Seokjin was the first to raise his hand, “I’ll go save the princess.”

Sowon watched the broad-shouldered man step away from his motorbike and towards the building, holding out his arms. She rolled her eyes in annoyance, but still couldn't help but think that the two would make a cute pair. Somehow. Maybe. Like, “if Seokjin wasn't part of the underground life” maybe, but deep down she knew that wouldn't happen. The eldest member of her little mischievous gang had expressed plenty of times that he'd never want to leave the lifestyle. Knowing that, Sowon would never allow Seokjin to corrupt someone as pure as Sumin—never.

“C’mon princess, I got you,” Seokjin mumbled to Sumin, who was busy trying to slide down the pipe, while whining desperately.

How did Sowon do it so naturally? The second she was in reach for Seokjin, his hand held her on her thighs to stabilize her—or maybe her butt—but he was just trying to help her, right? As soon as Sumin was closer, he wrapped his arm around the waist of the tinier woman and helped her until she could feel the earth beneath her feet again. Sumin didn’t have much time to let her gaze wander over the seven men, who each stood next to a motorbike, when Sowon was already walking up to her again. Who were those people? She really needed to keep an eye on her roommate. What if she was involved with something bad? She couldn’t let this happen.

Chuckling at how confused her cute innocent little roomie was being, Sowon told Sumin to stop thinking so much as it would cause permanent wrinkles on her face. Sowon then pushed a helmet into Sumin’s hands with a blinding smile. Seriously! How could this woman still look so badass and beautiful? Once again Sumin had been baffled by Sowon and her sudden persona change.

“You can take mine,” The leader said and turned around again, before she gracefully placed herself right behind Jungkook on his motorbike. Laying her head on his shoulder, she took in the familiar smell of his cologne. Her arms wrapped around the man’s waist, as Jungkook let the engine of his motorbike roar loudly once, as a sign for everyone to get ready.

“Wait...is she driving without a helmet?” Sumin mumbled already getting dragged away by the arm, as she looked up at Seokjin. “Don’t worry, Jungkook would never let anything happen to her,” The older chuckled and placed the helmet on Sumin’s head, securing it tightly, “Now come on...we still got shit to do! Hop on!”

Sumin stared at the street bike; fear glazed over them. They weren’t being serious, right? There was no way in Hell that she would ever get on the one thing that could kill her.

Uh-huh.

Nope.

Not gonna happen.

“You do know that those things have the highest rate of accidents and deaths, right?” She shook her head firmly, “I’m not suicidal enough to want to get on one.” She stated, crossing her arms over her chest.

Seokjin chuckled softly. She’s too cute right now.

“Relax, princess. You’re knight-in-shining-armor will keep you safe.” He said with genuine smile, wrapping a warm arm around her shoulders.

A short groan escaped her lips. Not because of the aspect of her going on a death vehicle, but because Seokjin’s sudden bold action. No guy had ever held her this close.

Sumin remained quiet for a few more seconds. She honestly had to make her decision quickly. One, because she had eight pair of eyes staring at her, and two, because the weight of the motorcycle helmet took a toll on Sumin, and she could no longer keep her head steady.

Yeah...she needed to work out…

“Promise, you won’t let anything happen to me.” Sumin mumbled as she walked over to Seokjin’s street bike and hooked one foot over, now straddling the bike.

Seokjin scoffed softly yet had this interesting smirk plastered on his face.

“I promise. I won’t let anything happen to you.” He declared as he got on his bike. He put on his helmet and then roared the engine, accidentally startling Sumin. She knew street bikes were loud but not this loud.

Sowon eyed the “couple” with a keen interest. The way Seokjin said, “I promise. I won’t let anything happen to you...”, piqued her curiosity. Maybe he won’t corrupt her.

Maybe…

“Alright, let’s go!” The gang leader shouted before Jungkook took off. Followed by Namjoon and Hoseok. Then, Yoongi, Jimin, and Taehyung. Seokjin and Sumin were the last to drive off.

Now, the question was...where were they heading off to?

When they stopped at the first stoplight, Sowon reached and placed her hands on Jungkook’s back, feeling the strong muscles of his shoulders. He adjusted himself, in his seat, a little as she snuggled back into her and turned his head slightly back, “You think this is a good idea to take her with us, babe?”

But Sowon only shrugged her shoulders as an answer, while she winked at the younger girl who was frantically holding onto Seokjin’s waist. Sowon couldn’t help but laugh.

Jungkook geared the bike up again as they headed down the road, a little over the speed limit but they weren’t out to get any attention from the police tonight. Jungkook could feel Sowon’s grip move from his waist up to his chest as she laid her hands upon his pecs. She gently moved them, massing them with her fingers. Jungkook released an unheard moaned slightly into his helmet, the vibration of the bike aiding in his rise in passion. Sowon leaned into his back, pushing herself more into him, enjoying feeling his warmth and strength.

Sumin’s eyes were fixated on the pair for a while, then her eyes flickered over to the other boys, who were chasing each other mindlessly. Seriously—where the fuck did she stumble into and also… hadn’t they already taken this turn? Were they driving in circles? To make her confused? Well, it worked. Sumin was totally lost. Maybe it was because she had her eyes closed from time to time—but she wouldn’t admit that if someone would have asked.

Only minutes later, they pulled up a hill, and Sumin gawked as they drove up a long driveway that lead up to a huge house. Wait…a mansion.

Jungkook pulled up to the front door. He offered his arm, as Sowon exited the bike. He easily snug his arm around her waist, walking up to the main door, followed by the other five boys. Only Seokjin was still outside.

“Let’s go, sunshine,” He grabbed her hand as if it was nothing and pulled her along and into the luxurious house. It was like she entered a whole other world and with that…she was faced with a whole new Sowon.

“Thank you, baby,” Sowon said with a smile when Jungkook reached around her waist to put the holster back around. Finally, she had her gun back. She couldn’t carry it around in college, right? Jungkook took the opportunity to place a chaste kiss on her lips and Sowon took out the gun, letting it click once.

Sumin eyed Sowon with an interesting gleam. Her eyebrow perked up as she continued to observe her roommate mess with the gun. The way the older lady handled the weapon, it was if she had used it countless of times.

“I know that look, and to answer your question, Sowon knows everything there is to know about guns.” Sumin heard Seokjin say as he appeared by her side, wrapping a comforting arm around her shoulders. Sumin started to think that he liked having such a close contact with her.

The innocent girl furrowed brows; confusion ever so visible on her face.

“What do you mean by that?” She questioned, directing her attention at Sowon and Jungkook, who seemed to be inches away from engaging in an intense makeout session.

Just as Seokjin was about to unveil Sowon's true identity, the two of them heard the confident leader's shouts.

“Sumin, what did I say about messing with the dude that has a tiny dick! Get your cute ass over here, so I can give you a tour!”

This frustrated fueled growl emitted from his lips while Sumin couldn't help but flash a sympathetic smile at the embarrassed man.

“I'm going to kill her in her sleep…” He muttered as he led Sumin towards the mansion.

Sowon smiled sweetly at the two as they walked up the pathway.

“Took you long enough,” She turned to look at Sumin, “Now, my pretty little sunshine, welcome to my home.” Sowon said as she turned around and opened the double doors, unveiling this bright aura that practically blinded Sumin.

The moment her mind registered the rather extravagant chandelier, Sumin's jaw nearly dropped to the floor.

Sowon chuckled at her roommate’s response, “Close your mouth or else flies will get in there, babe.”

Sumin’s instantly slammed her mouth shut. Her eyes ever so wide as the rest of the fellas, minus Jungkook and Seokjin, brushed past. The smiles, that painted their faces, were so bright. Anyone could tell how ecstatic they were to be back home after months of doing recon work and other gang related activities.

“When was the last time you guys were here?” asked the curious young lady, turning her head towards the remaining three.

Seokjin raised his brow as he and Jungkook took the time to count the days since they last slept in their own bed.

Sowon laughed lightly at the elder and her boyfriend. The serious look on their faces were priceless.

“To speed things up, it has been maybe a few months since we were last here. Me being in college and all. While, the boys were doing what they do best.” She explained before taking Jungkook’s hand and pulling him inside the mansion.

Both Sumin and Seokjin watched the couple go inside before following suit. Seokjin wrapped an arm around her shoulders, though, he secretly wanted to wrap it around her petite waist.

He then guided her inside the house as he softly told the innocent one, between her and Sowon, to just go with the flow when it came to his leader.

“I’ve been meaning to ask…I overheard you and the others call Sowon, “leader”. Why is that?” Sumin suddenly asked, finally releasing the curiosity that had been building up since she had saw Sowon do that drastic change.

Seokjin hummed in response, shrugging off his leather jacket. How should he answer her without giving too much away.

“Uh…” He began, trying to figure out the perfect combination of words, “Well, she’s the only girl in our group, so we thought it would be polite to make her the leader.” He lied flawlessly, “Plus, she has this charismatic side to her and can easily control a bunch of hormonal men, so that’s a bonus.” He added playfully before taking Sumin’s hand, causing the poor girl to tense slightly, and guiding her to the living room.

Sumin’s thoughts were racing in her mind, as she was trying to take it all in. She maybe once or twice pinched herself just to make sure she wasn’t having any weird dreams right now but that she in fact, stood in a luxurious mansion with her pajamas still on.

“This is our cozy living room, you can find one upstairs as well, though we kind of use it as a movie theater kind of thing,” Sowon said nonchalantly, before she continued her tiny house tour with her roommate, “There’s a pool outside that you can use anytime, though if I were you I would try the Jacuzzi it’s way more fun. Over there is the kitchen, two bathrooms right there and every room upstairs has its own.” Sowon walked ahead, pulling Sumin along on her wrist as the leader followed one of the boys until they stood in front of a wall.

Sumin furrowed her brows. Why did they all stare at the wall? And why… oh, the second Yoongi had typed in something on his little tablet, a door opened that you could have barely see.

“This is the panic room,” Sowon giggled, “But don’t fret..! It’s has another use for us.” She finished.

Walking in, she let go of Sumin’s wrist and followed the boys. There was a big room, weapons decorating the wall, some kind of computer system that Sumin couldn’t quite figure out but apparently Yoongi did—because he was already typing away. Her mouth stood open as she turned in the room, stumbling a little. Seokjin’s arms wrapped around her securely, as he pushed her down onto a chair, “You better sit.”

“So, what’s up? Why the sudden intervention?” Sowon asked, settling onto Jungkook’s lap and looking at the boys. Her heart was racing. A smile formed at her lips when Yoongi finally spoke the words, “We know where NCT is…”

“Fucking finally,” Sowon exclaimed, “So, when, where, and how━give me all the details!” Yoongi nodded at Hoseok, who quickly turned to get out a folder with all the information they had gathered.

NCT was a fairly new gang, who had quickly risen from the underground taking to take over every part of Seoul. The south part was Sowon’s territory. She owned it. Every club, every drug deal and everything illegal was happening on her watch. It all lead back to her and the gang. Everything had been great until NCT had been attacking them at the harbor, destroying and taking away some of the drugs that originally were owned by Sowon’s gang. She would have taken them all down already, if there wasn’t one problem. NCT was really good at hiding, especially with making sure their own leader stayed safe. Yet no one was as good as Sowon. A wicked smile fixated itself on her lips, as she licked them slowly. Now she knew where they were. She only needed a bait. Something to lure in the boss of NCT.

Suddenly all eyes turned towards Sumin.

Too busy glancing around, taking note of everything her eyed landed on, Sumin failed to notice the billions of eyes focusing on her. She puffed out her cheeks as she continued to stare at anything and everything until her eyes finally made contact with everyone else.

A look of confusion appeared on her innocent face. Questions swarmed her beautiful mind.

Soon, a nervous chuckle escaped her lips as Sumin tried her hardest to avoid making eye contact again.

Fun little fact, Sumin hated attention unless it was for school related activities. Anything outside of academics, she’d rather remain invisible. Why? Well, less attention meant that she could maintain her unbreakable focus. Having that focus meant that she’d excel in her school work. Doing great in her academics meant a higher chance of her being admitted into the more prestigious schools that had a wonderful law program.

Moments of silence continued to pass by. Sumin, wanting the attention to stop, and Sowon, maintaining direct eye contact with her boys. It was if her intense stare explained why it would be a brilliant idea to have Sumin be the bait.

“Seriously, it’s foolproof,” Sowon began, whispering roughly, “NCT doesn’t know what she looks like, and if Seokjin here could easily be smitten with how innocent she is, think about how their invisible leader would react.” She finished, smirking devilishly.

Seokjin sighed loudly; this unspeakable, foreign rage filled his entire body. He couldn’t quite understand why, but the thought of someone else looking and touching his innocent little angel irked him to not end━and Sowon instantly noticed.

“Problem, Jinnie?” She asked sweetly, though, the fellas knew what that tone meant. It meant that the elder member better say, “no”, and keep his fucking mouth shut. The only time they would all immediately submit to her.

Seokjin scoffed, rolling his eyes, as he resumed watching Sumin as if he was her guardian━her protector.

“Great.” Sowon said shortly, maintaining the sweetest and brightest smile ever to be seen. She then stood up and shouted, “Oh, Sumin!”

Sumin stopped looking at this painting of the Eiffel Tower and directed her attention on to her roommate.

“Yeah?” She questioned, wondering what Sowon could possibly want.

“Guess what! We are going to go out clubbing this weekend to celebrate you sneaking out of the room!” Sowon lied flawlessly as she stood up from Jungkook’s lap and placed a friendly hand on both of Sumin’s shoulders.

Sumin frowned, “Why does that warrant a celebration? If anything, I should be punished…”

Sowon playfully winked at her, “Well, if you want…” She pulled the younger female closer, “I can always punish you, my sweet sunshine.” She whispered seductively, fighting the laughter that brewed within her.

Sumin groaned, feeling incredibly uncomfortable, “Yeah. No, thank you.” She said, unknowingly pleasing Sowon.

Sowon smiled, nodding, as she thought, “Good. She might be able to resist the leader of NCT if he were to try and charm her.”

Then, the brightest smile etched itself on her face as she practically smothered Sumin with her embrace. The way she held her shy roommate looked as if Sowon was one tiny shove away from landing on top of Sumin’s body, causing the two of them to fall over.

“Good answer!” Sowon shouted happily as Sumin tried to wiggle her way out of Sowon’s bone crushing grasp. Letting go of Sumin, Sowon held onto her shoulders to look at her roommate once more. “Yep, this will work,” The leader mumbled, as she turned her head to the boys, “We all know they love innocence...right, Jinnie?”

The other nodded, his jaw locked. Yeah, he didn’t like this idea at all.

“Good,” Sowon happily and let go of her roommate, “Jin, will you be so nice and take care of Sumin for me. Show her a room and then you can start training her a little tomorrow. You wouldn’t want her to be completely defenseless, right?”

Sumin’s eyes widened at Sowon’s words. Defenseless? Training? The girl hastily turned around, her gaze wandering over the guns again, then some knives and all kind of other weapons. The thoughts running wild. She was watching the boys, how they were focused on something in front of them. Papers strewn all over the table. A hand on her shoulder made her jerk out of her stupor. Her eyes locked with Seokjin’s who looked at her with a sweet smile.

“Who is Sowon?” Sumin stuttered, her voice barely audible.

A/N: Hi everyone! What do you guys think of this update? Do you guys think that Sumin is slowly piecing everything together? I think so lol she is one smart cookie!

Don’t forget to leave a comment/like/reblog/and an ask in mine or Jey’s inbox! We love hearing your thoughts!

- Kim

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irmcpar · 6 years

Text

Sober

Word Count: 1837

Characters: Jensen, Danneel, Jared(mentioned), Misha(mentioned), JJ, (writers/producers/creators of SPN mentioned) unnamed!daughter!reader

Warnings: substance abuse, depression, suicidal thoughts, ANGST, angst, ANGst, just lots of angst. Please read with caution if you are sensitive to any of the previous warnings!

A/N: (If you or anyone you know is struggling with substance abuse issues, call 1-800-662-4357 {US}) (Based on the song Sober by Demi Lovato)

It’s been four years. It’s been four years, five months, and two weeks since my last hit of cocaine and last sip of alcohol. I was 14 when I met Taylor. She was the girl everyone wanted to fuck or fuck up. She didn’t care what others thought about her. I, on the other hand, worried about everything other people thought.

My dad was going into the tenth season of his show on the CW. He was a successful actor who made a mistake with his girlfriend 18 years ago. My birth-mother left us after she gave birth to me because she wasn’t “ready for a family”. In other words, she would have rather spent her time doing drugs in back allies with random guys than have a family. My dad was so broken after that.

He kept auditioning for things, taking whatever job he could to financially support us both. I was only five at the time he booked Supernatural. He brought me with him on his first day on set because the babysitter canceled last minute. It was only a table read so he was hoping to find a quiet place for me to wait for him to finish up. However, Andrew, Robert, and Eric took a liking to me instantly and insisted I was in the room and “watch her daddy hard at work”. So that’s what the next five years of my life were like. We still lived in LA but that changed when I had to start school. We moved back to Dallas where Aunt Kenzie and Uncle Josh lived with Grandma and Grandpa. I stayed with them when Dad had to film in Vancouver.

When I turned seven, Dad finally said I could go to Summer camp! With me out of the house for the next month and a half, he went back to LA during his Summer hiatus and booked a role in the independent movie, Ten Inch Hero. I was worried about him. He didn’t take breaks anymore. Last year he spent his Summer hiatus working on My Bloody Valentine 3D, which he hasn’t yet let me see. I was afraid he was worrying too much about money. Worrying too much about not being able to provide for me. He was doing an amazing job. He was only thinking like this because both of us were living on just one income thanks to my birth-mother leaving us.

I was afraid he wouldn’t have peace of mind. I was afraid he wouldn’t find love again. That is until he met Danneel. She was such an amazing influence on him and myself. She bought me my first dress when I was eight and taught me how to braid my own hair. She made my dad so happy. She brought out the secret smile he only used when I was around. I was a little jealous at first at how she was getting more and more of his time but Dad talked to me when he felt I was pulling away.

My birth-mother apparently had a mental illness that ran in her family and Jensen was always afraid I may eventually start to experience a few symptoms. And I did. Being the daughter of an actor was not easy. Going into high school without many friends, I jumped on the soonest possible person willing to become friends. My mom never thought Taylor was a good influence. She didn’t like it when Jensen was gone and she had to deal with a hormonal and rebellious teenage girl and a newborn all by herself. She never forced herself into my life but I happily welcomed her as my mom since the first time I slipped when I asked her for a juice box when I was nine.

I would sneak off in the middle of the night when Taylor was having a party and everyone who was anyone would be there. She showed me the ropes when it came to smoking weed or mixing a little bit of each bottle of alcohol my parents had in the cabinet so they wouldn’t notice. She taught me everything I knew but even when I’d be high on something and/or drunk off my ass, I’d still feel lonely. Still feel empty. Shit, is this what it’s like to be depressed? To feel like you have no one?

I don't know, I don't know, I don't know, I don't know why I do it every, every, every time It's only when I'm lonely Sometimes I just wanna cave and I don't wanna fight I try and I try and I try and I try and I try Just hold me, I'm lonely

A year later, I got into some trouble with my parents. I came home way past my curfew. They didn’t know I just sniffed a bunch of cocaine and was high as fuck. My dad yelled and sent me to my room but Danneel could sense something was up. I stumbled my way up the stairs to my room. We moved to Austin after JJ was born last year so I’m still not use this new house and accidentally walked into her room and plopped down on a small couch placed in the corner of the nursery.

I reached down and searched for the secret bottle I kept stashed away in my bed frame. When I couldn't find it, I started screaming. My parents came running in and while I was hysteric, JJ started crying, making the whole situation worse. My dad calmed me down and I told him everything. Everything. I just gave up and let out everything I’ve been going through. I didn’t know what else to do. My dad cried that night holding me. He was holding the both of us together.

Momma, I'm so sorry I'm not sober anymore And daddy, please forgive me for the drinks spilled on the floor To the ones who never left me, we've been down this road before I'm so sorry, I'm not sober anymore

That was four years ago. Now I’m 18 and finishing high school with a 3.8 GPA. Full-ride to Texas Tech’s psych program. I was going to help people. Help adolescents who battle substance abuse and depression. I used my dad’s conventions and connections as a platform to help people like me out there. Misha and I’ve been working together to raise funds for organizations that already do this and knowing that I’ve helped people makes it so much better.

But I fucked up. I forgot to pack my antidepressants and haven’t been taking them all week. I needed a hit. Needed the buzz. Needed to feel alive again. I never hurt myself when I felt like this. I only craved the drug. Only craved the taste of alcohol. I wasn’t going to tell Dad, or Misha, or Jared how I felt. It would only disappoint them.

I felt lonely again even though I knew somewhere deep down, I had a family waiting with open arms for me to fall back onto them when I needed it. But my mind was clouded. I needed it. I needed it bad.

And I'm sorry for the fans I lost Who watched me fall again I wanna be a role model, but I'm only human

When my Dad fell asleep in the adjacent hotel bed, I got out of mine and searched in the mini-bar for something strong enough. I realized it would later show up on my dad’s bill for the hotel so instead, I snuck outside in search of something. Knowing how difficult it would be to find coke at this hour, I went to the closest convenience store for some hard liquor.

I was walking back and I saw this shady looking guy speed-walking on the side of the street. He passed me something when he passed me. I didn’t know what it was but another man walked up to me and asked which way the man went. I pointed in his direction and he thanked me. ‘That was weird’ I thought. I opened my hand and saw a small plastic bag filled with 1 gram of white powder. I knew it was cocaine. I was frozen. It was like some higher power heard my prayer and graced me with some coke. I closed my hand and looked around, seeing if the interaction was witnessed by anyone. I walked back into the hotel and straight towards the lobby bathroom. I took a dollar and rolled it up. Used my credit card to move the white powder on the bathroom counter into a straight line. I snorted the whole things in one, swift motion. Cleaned up the evidence and made my way back to our room.

Once I got to the room, I relished this feeling I haven’t had in four years. It was fucking great. I reached in my pocket for the room key. Not there. Maybe my other pocket. Shit. Shit fuck. What was I going to do? Drink. That's what. I remembered I went out to buy some liquor and pulled out the bottle from the brown bag and slid down the wall next to the door. I stayed up all night long. Talking to myself about how amazing it feels to be back.

The next morning, when my dad woke up, he panicked when he didn’t find me in my bed or the bathroom. He called my phone, hoping I went out for some breakfast. He hears my phone’s ringtone from outside the door and nearly rips it off its hinges. He didn’t know how to feel when he saw my body slumped over with a mostly empty bottle of Jameson's spilled on the floor.

He sighed and sat next to my figure, gently prying the bottle from my hands. He tilted my head up to see a bit of white powder under my nose. “Jesus, Sweetheart,” he sighed pulling my body into his arms. Dad always held me when I was feeling down. It was his way of pulling me out of this dark hole that has consumed my life. It was at that moment he didn’t feel me breathing. “Sweetheart?” He asked with a pang of fear in his voice. “Shit. HELP!” He yelled.

He continued to yell until hotel security came and called 911. He continued to yell as they loaded your body into the ambulance. He continued to yell in the hospital, holding your hand as your heart stopped forever.

I'm not sober anymore I'm sorry that I'm here again I promise I'll get help It wasn't my intention I'm sorry to myself

#supernatural-bellawinchester #supernatural #jensen ackles #jensen ackles x daughter #daughter!reader #jensen x reader angst #dean x reader angst #spn x reader angst #addiction #substance abuse #alcohol #cocaine #sober #sober demi lovato #angst

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