Laudna.
Back to the place where she died.
Back to the place where she has been brought back. Twice.
Still healing from that. Still not over how not too long ago she killed a man in cold blood because she lost control. Because of betrayal. Darkness. Hunger.
A little kid touched her chest and felt so much hatred that she had to run away, scared. A hatred that laudna did not put there, that is not her own but that she’s been made to carry.
Delilah. Imogen’s promise.
Ashton. Her friend. The one that’s as visually broken as her. The one that’s always got it. The one that’s enabled her behavior in the past. Comforted her. Betrayed her. Hurt Fearne. Almost didn’t make it through. Reckless. Stupid. Woke up something within her, something bad.
The shard. Delilah. Hunger. Fear. She’s gonna hurt someone again. Her old hut. Coldness.
“Sometimes you have to walk from whence you came to appreciate how far you’ve come.”
The woods. Her friends running after her again. Guilt. Shame.
Ashton’s doll.
Imogen, the one she loves, the one that gave her a reason to live, the one that has never shied away from her, that has loved her through it all. She took off the circlet that kept her away from Laudna’s thoughts– thoughts that once were musical, that truly were the first reason that drove them together– immediately told her that she was disgusted by what she now found within her, the recent state of presence of the woman that lives there. That haunts her. Her abuser, driving Imogen away.
Laudna’s not sure which of her wants or feelings are actually hers anymore.
Laudna dreams about a normal life. Sometimes. All the time..
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idk guys but i think "black lady making a parody campaign of an overrated kid's book written by a transmisogynist where they mock the original book and its writer at every given venue and it barely feels like the original" is not nearly equatable to "white guy making a joke about an asian trans woman having a dick in her intro, immediately calling attention to it by laughing at his own joke, and not developing that poor trans woman as anything more than a mildly antagonistic force/love interest for another trans person"
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I can't believe y'all almost made me pay to go watch po*r th*ngs in theater without telling me that the whole thing revolves around a hardcore born sexy yesterday trope with a side dish of pseudo necrophilia where a woman with the brain of a litteral foetus who don't have periods or body hair (but do have boobs!) find joy and freedom by having a lot of sex with a bunch of men, shoving a apple up her vagina for some reason and joining a brothel (but it's a cool socialist brothel and all the girls looove being there, don't worry guys), all of that written and directed by two men, I'm never gonna trust you guys after this one lmao
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if ursa has a million fans, then i am one of them. if ursa has ten fans, then i am one of them. if ursa has only one fan then that is me. if ursa has no fans, then that means i am no longer on earth. if the world is against ursa, then i am against the world 😔
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ok imma just pop off about one of my dnd ocs...
the way that maizakeen is heading for a break down has me Screaming
she had the Horrors (voices of the dead/dark thoughts and strange magic) dropped on her at age fucking twelve....she overcompensated with intense optimism and kindness to beat it all back (also training relentlessly to control her magic so she could help herself and others)
she grew up so privileged and sheltered that is was working, life was good in her little bubble.... and then it shattered when her grandfather died and further more when she went out into the world
session after session she is seeing how bleak the greater world is and it is fracturing her hold on her literal inner demons ever so slowly
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fucking beats me dude, how people manage to create shit out of thin air, work themselves up into a frenzy of rage over it, and then end up making that your business.
I don’t get you straight people
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there's this woman in the train who is clearly at her freaking limit with her son who keeps wailing and she's resorting to name calling and you know insults cause she's clearly past tired rn
but then there's this other woman who started to talk about her Own son like 'my son is 25 now' and the woman with the child is like. not having it. she does not give a shit about this woman's immature manchild son
this is surreal she's talking right over her. i don't know what to do here
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god willing this will not be the start of me sincerely sharing Opinions on tumblr dot com but the thing about Kindness and Empathy being paraded as easy breezy & effortless by some is that those posts are often written by very young people who have age-limited experience with the diversity of thought & expression that exists. knowing "there are people out there who think radically differently from me" =/= collaborating with those people in total sincerity and with unwavering compassion.
empathy is a skill i always always have to practice not only because i've had to sit in front of people who genuinely, sincerely hate women as a class of people because of specific lived experiences, and i still had to (and had to want to!) give them therapy, and had to work to the best of my knowledge and creativity to help them break isolation and make friends and not kill themselves, because i don't get to decide, actually, whether or not they deserve to live in misery and die alone - and anyway, building relationships can dismantle prejudices for some people -
but also because the more conversations i have (the number only ever increasing, as you get older), the more likely i am to hear a completely batshit take like, "all victims of intimate partner violence have borderline personality disorders, otherwise they wouldn't stay with their abusers," which i heard this evening. and i would humbly posit that any decent person would need to have a really, really deep well of patience to not promptly smack the person saying that with some sort of rolled newspaper, or perhaps a door.
it is easy to say things or set intentions or wtv when you have little to no chance of encountering situations where those intentions will be challenged. don't expect sainthood from yourself or others. all of it's hard. just try your best!
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