#pregnant kaz brekker

[sissytobitch10seconds]

Expanding the Flock

Fandom: Grishaverse: SIx of Crows Summary: The five times that they tried to have a baby and the one time that it worked. Warnings: Trans male pregnancy, miscarriages, mentions of self harm, canon backstories/trauma, brief sex scenes, and childbirth Word Count: 16,873 Ship(s): Kaz Brekker/Jesper Fahey/Inej Ghafa/Matthias Helvar/Wylan Van Eck/Nina Zenik

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A/N: So I'm back on my bullshit when it comes to writing things that only I will like. I love angst, my autistic interest is pregnancy/birth, and Kaz is one of the characters I love to torture here. I hope that whoever else this appeals to enjoys it! Stay sissy and bitchy everyone <3

1. Jesper

He had gone out on a nice date with his husband that night. They had stopped by their favorite cafe and shared a bottle of wine and more pastries than their wife needed to know about before they had gone to the new opera house to watch a show that was a shared favorite of theirs. They had held hands as they walked along the side of the river and giggled together over the jokes that the actors had made. It had been a wonderful night and it was going to be topped off with what he hoped would end up with them both sweating and cuddled up together on their big bed.

That had been before two incredibly stupid looking goons had stepped out from an alley that they were passing by and started yelling at them. The one on the left had long red hair that was brushed out so that it had almost become as fluffy and big as Jesper’s hair, but down to his waist instead of tucked up against his head. He was wearing a pair of mismatched socks that were only on display because his pants had been hacked off at the knee with what appeared to be safety scissors. The one on the right had short black hair and his left arm was such a tight network of scars that it hung uselessly down at his side. They were both dressed in a very distinctive pink and orange polka dot pattern and they were both holding guns. 

“Don’t resist, come with us quietly!” the one on the left almost screamed. Jesper would have felt bad for him if the wasn’t threatening his husband.

“Are you attempting to kidnap us?” Kaz asked, raising a brow as an amused smirk began to pull at his lips. Jesper was so unafraid of what the thugs had to offer that he turned his head to the side so that he could admire the absolute beauty that was his husband. It sent flutters of butterflies up from his stomach to his heart and then down to his fingertips. Kaz was bathed in the flickering yellow light from the oil lamps and the silvery moonlight. His skin almost glowed when he was in this kind of mood and it was addicting.

Jesper snapped his attention back to the attempted fight at hand when the thugs began to move. He flicked his coat back and pressed his thumb to the pearl handle of his revolver just to remind himself that it was there if he ended up needing to use it. He didn’t really want to have to kill the new thugs since they hadn’t learned their lesson, it likely wasn’t even their fault. Whoever had sent them to try and do business with Dirtyhands and his sharpshooter should have told them what they were getting into. Maybe he could convince Kaz to just knock them out and then leave them in the alley they had jumped from, since he was already in a good mood. 

They looked towards each other and then turned back towards the duo. “We-we’re mugging you!”

“You’re mugging us? I don’t think that anyone has mugged me like this since I was seven,” Kaz snorted.

“You weren’t even in Ketterdam when you were seven,” Jesper whispered through a snort. He saw the dark sparkle in his husband’s eye and knew that Kaz was enjoying toying with the two thugs.

“We’re mugging you!” the thug on the left replied, though he dropped one of his hands from his gun to itch at his leg.

“Likely,” Kaz hummed. “If you want to get money from people in the Barrel then you should learn how to run a con or pick-pocket. If you can’t manage either of those then you could always attempt to sell yourself to one of the whorehouses, though they don’t take the extra guests.”

That got the thugs angry enough that they actually launched themselves at Jesper and Kaz, which was about the stupidest thing that they could have done other than coming after the Bastard of the Barrel in the first place.

They seemed to have the same idea about how they were going to deal with their new problem, thankfully. Jesper went for the one on the right and Kaz went for the one on the left, neither of them bothering to pay attention to the other because of how many fights that they had endured alongside each other. Jesper grabbed the thug’s wrist and then slammed it down onto the streetlamp that they were next to so that the nerves frayed. It caused the thug to let go of his pea shooter, which clattered noisily down to the ground and shot the lackluster bullet through the night air.

“Damn, you really need to up your weapons if you’re going to try and go after people like us,” Jesper laughed. He wrapped one of his lanky arms around the back of the man’s neck so that he could cut off his air. He pressed a little bit harder when hands began to claw at his skin to try and get him to let go. He counted to ten before he felt the body leaned up against him go completely limp. He dumped the thug down onto the ground and then turned to his husband, fully expecting the other thug to be incapacitated as well.

He forgot that Kaz was recently recovering from a cold, or at least that was what they had assumed it was. After everything that Kaz had been through when he was a child, it was almost impossible to get him to admit that he was actually sick when he was. The recovering and slowness meant that Kaz hadn’t quite taken down his thug. The man in question was already beat to a near pulp but was persisting on regardless. He had a black eye and several cuts on the arm that was holding onto his gun, but was standing strong. Jesper walked over and grabbed the revolver on his right hip. He made eye contact with Kaz as the two of them communicated silently.

Kaz lurched forward with his cane clasped in his hand at the same time as Jesper, both of them knocking their weapons against the thug’s head so that he crumpled down to the ground. What they hadn’t been expecting was for him to fall forward and onto Kaz, knocking the already unsteady man down onto the ground.

Immediately after seeing his husband on the ground, Jesper jumped into action. He grasped the thug and tossed him off Kaz with no particular care before he offered his hand out. Kaz was already holding his cane so if it turned out that he had been triggered and needed to not touch someone, he would be able to get up on his own.

He had been doing a lot better lately, thankfully, so he was able to reach out and take Jesper’s hand. He used his cane and his husband to right himself properly. His gloved hands brushed over his suit, Jesper helping but really just using it as an excuse to try and reignite the mood that had hung in the air between them at the time. The sharpshooter only paused his ministrations when he smelled the thick coppery scent of blood and pulled his hand away after feeling something damp.

“Kaz, love, did you get hurt in that fight?” he was trying to keep the fear from his voice. It had been a long time since any of them had been involved in something that could be considered deadly, but he still had nightmares about holding the dead bodies of his partners in his arms.

“He only hit me a couple of times and it was mostly in my arms,” Kaz replied, his face grim and a little bit gray.

“Then why do you smell like blood?” Jesper asked, growing more worried by the second. If it turned out that they had misidentified the sickness that Kaz was suffering from and he was far more ill than any of them had anticipated, he wasn’t sure that he was going to be able to handle it. He had already lost someone that was very dear to his heart once and it had torn him to shreds. 

Kaz was quiet for a bit, staring down at the ground. He pressed his hand to the lower half of his stomach and then let out a shaky sigh. “I think that I was pregnant, Jesper.”

His mind had been whirling with the thoughts of what might be wrong with his husband and the ways that they could fix it before he lost another person that held his heart. As soon as he heard what Kaz had said, every thought flashing through his mind ground down to a halt. He blinked a few times and then asked, “What?”

“My cycle was late. I didn’t have one last month,” he bit out. He was already limping in the direction of their home, his cane clacking loudly against the ground. Jesper hurried after him, his hands twitching as he wanted to comfort his distressed husband but wasn’t quite sure how he could do it effectively. “I didn’t want to say anything because I know that the Firepox messed up my system. I’ve heard of it causing infertility in people that get it as children.”

“But you had cycles even after you recovered,” Jesper said before he realized that it was a stupid thing to say.

He moved on instinct after that, looping one of his long arms around the back of his husband’s waist so that they were pressed together. He walked them slowly down the streets of their city so that they could find their way back home. Whatever was hurting Kaz wasn’t going to stop soon, so the best place for them to deal with that was back in their own house and away from prying eyes.

They were quiet through the entire walk, Kaz only pausing when they got to the front entrance of their home in Geldstraat. He kept his head bowed down and his body began to quiver, so Jesper tried to pull back. Kaz’s arm tensed from where it was looped over the other man’s body so that he had to stay where he was. “Please don’t leave me,” he whimpered.

“Never, baby, never,” Jesper whispered in promise. He pressed their bodies closer together and then helped Kaz through the front door of their home and down the hall to a parlor. He sat his husband down and then knelt in front of him, their hands still clasped together but no longer quite as close as they had been before. “What did you say was happening, again?”

“I’m having a miscarriage, Jes,” Kaz pursed his lips into a thin white line. It was as if speaking the words into the open air between them had made them all the more real, made them sink low and deep into both of their minds.

They had never talked about children, but it was always kind of understood that they might happen at one point. They had all already opened themselves up to the danger of having something that they loved so adding pets and kids didn’t seem like that far of a leap, not when they were as powerful and intelligent as they were. Still, they hadn’t talked about it and no one had really dwelled on it. Jesper wasn’t quite sure how he was supposed to feel about it.

He didn’t have to try to sort out his own thoughts as quickly as he was anticipating, thankfully, as Nina’s cheery voice rang out through the grand halls of their mansion, “Welcome home!”

Wylan and Nina walked into the parlor to greet their spouses but then stopped when they saw the ashen expression on both of their faces and the blood that was slowly turning Kaz’s pants crimson red through the navy black. “What happened?” Nina immediately asked as she rushed over to her husband.

So that they didn’t overwhelm the poor man, Jesper stood up and tried to brush the blood on his hand off on his pants. He didn’t even know when he had brushed against the part of Kaz that was bleeding to get it, but the idea of keeping it on him made his skin crawl. “We got in a fight on the way back. Just two low-brow thugs that thought that they could get something good out of us,” he explained.

“Did you get shot?” Wylan asked, worry evident across his features.

Kaz shook his head. “I think I was pregnant. Got knocked pretty hard in the stomach and I guess my womb isn’t good enough to hold onto a baby after a little bit of damage,” he pursed his lips again and then turned his head to the side.

None of them knew what to say to try and make it better. None of them had even known that Kaz had the ability to get pregnant, not after they had all spent nearly five years since the Ice Court heist fucking like rabbits with nothing happening. Still, they had to support their husband in the tumultuous time that he was going through before they gave themselves the grace to process their own emotions.

Nina was the first to act, giving him a gentle kiss to his forehead. “Come, let’s get you cleaned up and then into bed. I’ll make you some tea and a hot water bottle for the cramps.”

Kaz didn’t say anything as he took her hand and then limped after her. He kept one hand grasping the head of his cane and the other pressed to the very base of his belly, where their baby might have grown had Jesper just been a little bit faster in protecting him. He winced when he realized what his thoughts were flying towards, so pulled Wylan aside to talk to him so that he could work through his worries. They were going to have to tell Inej and Matthias what had happened soon too, but Jesper had to get his thoughts out of the clump they had formed first.

---

2.Inej

She hadn’t seen any of her partners in far too long, which meant that she had been in her room taking a nap with Koshak for nearly two hours. 

Inej didn’t claim to be particularly clingy, she thought that she was one of the more distant members of their polycule. Kaz and Matthias had to spend most of their days in a room with one or more of their partners present to feel sated while Nina and Jesper had to be touching someone at least every five minutes or they acted like they were going to die. Out of everyone, she and Wylan probably had the least damage when it came to aggressive separation anxiety.

Still, she missed them and she wanted to spend some time with them. So, Inej rolled over on her bed while trying very hard not to dislodge the cat from where he had curled up in a happy spot of sunshine. She stood gracefully from her bed and then pulled on the slightly uncomfortable trousers that she had chosen to wear that day. She was still getting up as early as she had during her last voyage, but she was staying up later than she had while she was at sea. It made her more tired throughout the day, so she spent a lot of time napping. She had been doing said napping with Kaz more often than not because he had also been struck by some sort of exhaustion that he refused to talk to anyone about.

Inej had been informed of the loss that the polycule had suffered while she was out at sea. It was one of the reasons that she had chosen to face more of her attention to the land persecution of slavers and bad rich men instead of hunting down ships. She wanted to be there if something like that happened again, and she knew that Kaz was going to be more reckless now that he had another tragedy hanging on the forefront of his mind.

Something in the very back of her brain was letting her know that there was a specific reason that Kaz had been so tired outside of him trying his best to match her own sleep schedule. She wasn’t able to track his cycles the same way that she could with Nina, which was how she made sure that her wife wasn’t unknowingly expecting whenever the other woman made something strange for dinner. She was still a spider and the Wraith, even if she didn’t do as many crimes as she had before they had taken down Van Eck.

She felt bad for employing the same tactics that Kaz had taught her back on him, but there was no other way that she could really figure out what was wrong with him. He seemed to be tired no matter how often he slept, often dozing when Matthias read in the evenings or when Jesper and Nina were arguing about something. He was also clingier than he had been, usually choosing to sit on the couch with one of them instead of in his chair to get his requested space. He had been eating a little bit more than he usually did, but Inej was also fully aware that he did that often when she came back into port so that he wouldn’t be caught mistreating his body.

She hadn’t been able to put her finger down on any type of conclusive proof, but she was beginning to suspect with every nap that her husband took that they might have another pair of feet running around their home before the year was out.

The thought both terrified and excited her. She had always wanted children, it had been something that she had clung on to even with her trauma from the Menagerie. She was glad when she fell in love with two other people that had the ability to carry children because it increased her chances to have the huge family that she knew that her heart was chasing after even if she wasn’t ever able to have sex enough to conceive herself. The idea of having children was overwhelming, especially so early into her slaver-hunting career and with what had happened to her. She knew that they were far more powerful and wary than her own parents had been, so no child that they had would ever have to go through what she had.

Inej shook her head to get rid of her thoughts. She noticed that her braid had begun to come undone around her neck, so she started unweaving the strands so that she could replait them. She opened the door to her room with her foot and then slipped silently out into the hall in search of some companionship. 

Wylan had a Merchant Council meeting that day and he was bringing Matthias with him so that he could have the upper hand when arguing about why they should handle the shipping of items to Fjerda in a very specific way. Nina and Jesper hadn’t mentioned having anything to do when they had gotten up to pretend to help her with breakfast that morning, so it was likely that they were also somewhere in their home. Kaz was probably either taking his own nap or down in his office.

She decided that she was going to patrol the house until she ran into someone, like she was a ghost haunting her own halls.

Her first stop was down in the kitchen, which was empty other than a long-cooking meal in a pot on top of the stove. Her hand twitched at her side as she longed to lift the lid so that she could see whatever concoction one of her spouses had whipped up that time, but she knew better than that now.

So she continued through the empty dining room to the family room where most of her spouses hung out when they weren’t working or sleeping. She smiled fondly when she finally came across one of her partners, taking in the sight before she let them know that she was even present. 

Jesper was splayed out on the couch so that his lanky body took up the entire piece of furniture. Nina was laid out on top of him, wearing only a chemise and a set of bloomers instead of being dressed in her grandeur like she usually was by that time of day. Jesper had one of his arms around the back of her hips to keep her up on the couch and her arms were pillowing her chin. They were looking at each other and talking in soft voices, neither of them paying attention to a single other thing in the world.

“Have either of you seen the others?” Inej asked as she stepped out of the shadows. 

She had to bite the insides of her cheek to keep from giggling when they both startled and nearly fell off of the couch. She walked over so that she could kiss them both as payment for frightening them. Once Nina had finished huffing her way into more affection, she finally answered her wife, “I think that Kaz said he was going to work in his home office. He might be taking a bath, I thought that I heard the water running.”

Inej startled slightly at that and worry overwhelmed her. Baths were a rarity for Kaz, both because they took quite a lot of time to get the trouble to be worth it and because being entirely submerged in water often reminded him of the worst trauma that he had ever endured. “I’m going to go check on him, I’ll see you both later!”

“You’re always welcome to join the cuddle pile, Inej,” Jesper said, his words slurred with comfort and sleep now that his surprise had faded.

The warmth from her spouses was enough to temporarily drown out the feeling of panic that she got about hearing where her husband was. She carefully stepped up the stairs of their home, skipping over the boards that creaked despite their higher quality of the building compared to the Slat. She paused when she got to the second floor, wondering briefly if she should check Kaz’s office before she resigned herself to continuing with the main mission. She wasn’t going to allow herself detours if it turned out that Kaz really needed her or something else had gone wrong.

Inej paused when she got to the door, knocking first instead of just entering right away. “Kaz, are you in there?”

“Go away,” he rasped back in reply. His voice sounded worse than it had before her nap, almost like he had been shouting or crying.

That only got her worry to increase so she grasped the handle to the door and pressed it open without asking. She knew that Kaz was going to demand that she leave, even scream or yell at her, but if something was wrong then she was going to help him. He didn’t have to sit alone with his fear and pain, not after so many years of companionship and marriage.

Before she had even had the chance to properly look at him, he did exactly what she was expecting he would and yelled, “Get out!

“Kaz, I’m not stupid, I know that something is wrong,” she snapped in reply. She stepped onto the heated tile of the bathroom and then closed the door behind her so that they could have a shade of privacy, though the rest of their partners could get through the locks in the house or open the doors themselves.

She took in the bathroom then, placing her hands on her hips so that she didn’t look as timid as she felt. Kaz very rarely yelled at her anymore so when he did it reminded her of the time before she had gotten her ship and learned how to be more than just his Wraith.

There was a heap of clothing on the ground between the counter with the sink and the toilet, which was usually where they all tried to hide something if they had been injured. Kaz was sitting in the tub, which was full of rather murky looking water. His hair had been perfectly styled that morning but now it was rumpled and hanging down over his pale forehead into his dark eyes. His shirt was off, which exposed his puffy chest to the open air and made his dark nipples stiff. The most peculiar thing about the whole situation was that he still had his smalls on even though he was submerged into the water.

“Inej, get out,” Kaz growled, doing his best imitation of a feral animal. He then let out something close to a whimper as he wrapped his arms around his belly and hunched forward. His jaw set, which meant that he was in pain, but his eyes also squeezed shut and his mouth twisted, which meant that he was upset about something.

It was then that Inej noticed that his once-white smalls were soaked through with blood in the crotch alone. His slacks were likely stained with the sticky red substance as well.

Her heart sunk low in her chest as she realized what had happened.

Inej cursed her saints for what they had done to answer her prayers. She had asked them to make sure that she was back with her partners if something like that ever happened again, which was why she was staying more in Ketterdam instead of sailing the seas. She was grateful that she had made that decision when she thought that Kaz was pregnant, but now that it was evident that he was having another miscarriage she wished that she hadn’t asked in the first place.

She gracefully closed the space between them so that she was kneeling down beside him. “I’m not going to touch you but I want you to know that I’m here.”

“Inej,” he sobbed. “I don’t want you to see me like this.”

“I’ve seen you vomiting after the first time that we had sex and fainting in a prison carriage, being by your side while you go through trauma is kind of my thing,” she said. He wasn’t going to respond well to gentleness or kindness, she knew that after all of the time that they had spent together. 

“I know how much you want children,” he sniffled. His good leg moved so that his knee was almost pressed into his chest, trying to make himself smaller so that he felt protected. Kaz groaned when the shift caused something inside of him to send pain throughout his entire body. He put his leg back down and leaned against the lip of the tub so that he was somewhat close to her.

It was true, he did know how desperately she wanted children. It was so hard for her to imagine herself growing old without a child to take care of, a mind to foster, a baby in her arms. She also knew that this wasn’t something Kaz could control, he hadn’t been in any fights like he had the last time that he had suspected he was pregnant. 

Inej took a deep breath so that she could steady her own mind and resist crying. She began to weave her fingers through his hair to put it back where it went, continuing the motion when she saw the shakiness of his shoulders stop. “Talk to me about what happened,” she murmured when his most recent cramp passed.

“Why?”

A small smile played at her lips despite herself. He was always going to be the same bastard that she had fallen in love with, even if his emotional range had expanded exponentially during their time together. “It will make you feel better.”

Kaz was quiet for a while longer before he started talking, “I thought that I was pregnant. I… I know that you noticed the way that I was changing. I was going to do something sweet to tell all of you, but then I was down in my office and I started to feel pain. By the time that I finished up my work and came up here to check what was going on…”

She leaned down and pressed a kiss to his temple. She kept her lips there as she murmured a prayer in the language that her parents had spoken to her, something to send the soul of the child they might have had to their next incarnation. “We will have a child one day, Kaz. It might not come from you and it won’t be in nine months, but one day. This wasn’t your fault.”

He stayed quiet, which made the worry inside of her increase tenfold. There was nothing that she could do about his thoughts, about the way that his mind worked. The only thing that she could do was stroke his hair and remind him that she was there.

---

3.Nina

She felt an arm around her waist twitch and then shudder as the nightmare increased. It was enough that it woke her up from her light doze. It was hailing outside, the droplets of ice shooting against the window loud enough to keep reminding her of what it had been like in the Druskelle ship when Matthias had taken her. She could never sleep well when there were storms, and she knew several of her other partners couldn’t either.

Slowly, she shifted in the bed so that she had turned around to see who was having the nightmare. She wasn’t able to soothe the emotions of people any longer since her powers had changed, but she could still hold them or talk to them when they woke up.

Inej was sleeping directly on top of Matthias, his long arms looped around her tiny frame so that he looked almost as if he was cradling a kitten against his chest. Wylan was sleeping with both of his hands over the top of his eyes and Jesper’s head resting on his shoulder. Kaz was the one that had ended up next to her even though she had come to bed first and him last, which meant that he was also the one having the nightmare.

“Kaz,” she whispered just loud enough that it would be able to rouse him from his sleep. She didn’t want to touch him because there was a good chance that the nightmare was a flashback to the Reaper’s Barge, which meant that he would feel oversensitive and panicked if he woke up with someone’s hand on him.

Her husband’s eyes flew open and he sat up in bed. His chest was heaving to bring in the breath that he needed to survive. His eyes had that wild, panicked look that they always got whenever he was thinking about something that scared him.

Nina carefully slipped from the bed and then placed her hand down on the top of the blanket so that it would pull on him and get his attention. “Love, come on. Let’s go to the kitchen,” she murmured. She didn’t want to wake any of their other partners but she did want to be able to break through the haze of post-sleep panic to get through to Kaz.

He didn’t respond for a second before he gave a shaky nod. He moved to the edge of the bed and then waited as Nina found his cane and handed it to him. That was something that they had done a lot during the beginning of their relationship, when nightmares were far more frequent than anyone in their polycule really wanted to admit.

Once the crow’s head was grasped in his pale, bare hand, he stood up and carefully followed after her. They were both completely silent other than the sound of shuffling feet on the wood floor until they reached the kitchen. “Did you have a nightmare?” Nina asked. She didn’t even turn to look back at him as she lit the stove and got out a pot so that she could heat up some water for tea. 

“I suppose that you could call it that,” he rasped. He sat down on the stool that had been tucked underneath the counter next to their icebox so that he could ease the pain in his leg.

She was quiet for a bit longer as she searched through the cupboards to find one of his favorite cookies. The tin was almost empty but there was enough that they could share a few while they talked. She still didn’t touch her partner as she knelt down beside him and then offered him one of the sweets.

Kaz turned his head to the side, his pale skin tinting green as he gave a minute shake. “I’m not hungry.”

“Are you going to be able to handle some tea?” she asked then. She wasn’t going to force Kaz to drink if he wasn’t up to it, but the tea usually soothed them both back to sleep when they had a bad dream.

“I think so,” he replied softly. Something was off about him but Nina couldn’t quite put her finger on it. Her powers had changed so much since she had taken the parem, so much so that she barely knew how to interact with other people now that she didn’t have the natural benefit of her Corporalki powers. Luckily, she had been together and married to her partners for long enough that she could read them decently even without the ability to sense their heart rates without thinking about it.

She carefully placed the lid back on the tin without taking one of the cookies for herself. Her husband was acting strange enough that the idea of taking one of his favorite treats made her skin crawl. She tucked the tin back up into the cupboard and then sat down in front of him. That gave Kaz the ability to reach out and touch her if he wanted, but didn’t force him to if he was feeling overstimulated like she suspected. “Kaz, what’s going on?”

“Can you still feel heartbeats if you focus? Without relapsing?” he asked instead of answering her question.

Nina felt even more unsteady than she had before. The distance in his eyes and the hunch of his shoulders told her that he had had a bad dream of some kind, but it wasn’t the type that usually plagued him based on the way that he wasn’t shying away from her whenever her dressing gown brushed against him in their small kitchen. She also knew that he never brought up her powers because he didn’t want to send her back down into the near-depressive spiral that had been triggered when she had gone back to Ravka and was unable to get her powers back to what they were before.

She took a deep breath as she told herself that whatever was going on with Kaz wasn’t something that required her to panic quite yet. She was sure that he would explain himself in time, he always did. “I can sense heartbeats without wanting more parem. I think that it has something to do with my ability to control the dead. They aren’t really dead if their heart is still beating,” she chuckled to try and lighten in the mood but the only thing that it did was make several watery tears raise in her husband’s eyes.

That by itself was rather terrifying and her heart began to beat a million miles a minute in her chest. She wasn’t sure what the dream had been or why it was upsetting her lover so much, but she wasn’t quite sure that she wanted to figure it out yet.

Kaz reached out before she could ask any more questions. Her breath hitched in her throat when she felt the callouses on the tips of his fingers from too may hours holding a lockpick brushing against her wrist. Her arm moved so that it was out straight and her hand was flat against the base of Kaz’s stomach, her fingertips just barely brushing against his hipbone. “Do you feel anything?”

It clicked in her brain then, what he was asking of her. 

She glanced towards the calendar and suddenly it made sense. She kept a little red circle that would be filled in so that she could keep track of her cycles, just in case her powers began to interfere with the natural way that her body worked. She had noticed that a blue version of the system had joined her when Inej had come back and then a black one had started to show up two months after that.

That month her dot was right beside Inej’s, but the black was still unfilled. Nina took a deep breath as she turned back to Kaz and asked, “Do you think that you’re pregnant?”

“I wouldn’t be asking you to search of a heartbeat in my belly if I wasn’t, Zenik,” he growled. “I do know basic human anatomy.”

She didn’t respond to his goading this time. Usually when he said something like that it was because he wanted to fight with her and then they would end up falling into each other with teeth and tongues and grabbing hands. This time he was saying it because he was scared, which was understandable if what he thought was happening really was.

Nina moved so that she was kneeling in front of him. She placed both of her hands on his lower belly and then let her eyes fall closed so that she could focus on what he had asked her to do. After she had recovered from the drug, it was harder for her to sense heartbeats, it was much easier for her to feel when there was the absence of one.

Still, she was going to work as hard as she could so that she could meet her husband’s request. She focused on pulling at that dark, empty place inside of her that had been left after the fall. She let out a low breath when the echo was returned to her with nothing, the same way that corpses did. 

At the end of the day, no matter what she did, she was still a criminal and a spy. That meant that she was usually very used to having to say hard things to people and was very sharp-tongued. This time, when she tilted her head up so that she could look at her husband, all of the words that were swirling in her mind had completely disappeared. “What other symptoms have you been feeling, love?” she asked, not moving her hands.

“Don’t stall, just tell me the answer,” Kaz replied bitterly. She could tell by the dark look in his eyes that he already knew what it was going to be before she even said anything.

“I can’t feel a heartbeat. I think that you were definitely pregnant but the only thing I can feel is…” she trailed off, unable to say anything. This was the third time that Kaz had conceived that they knew of and the third time that they had lost the baby before they even had the chance to grow. She wasn’t sure what that was doing her spouse if he felt even half as heavy as she did.

She watched the sharpness in his dark eyes dull slightly. Nina kissed his forehead as she pulled her hands away from him, forcing thoughts of a happy pregnancy into her mind to stave off the sadness for a while. She handed him the tea that had finished steeping and then sat with him until the rest of their partners could get up and help her take care of their husband.

---

4. Matthias 

After three miscarriages from unknown conceptions in four years, Kaz had finally told them that he was pregnant. 

They had all been absolutely overjoyed and nearly exploded all over him when Wylan put together the words found in the notes that Kaz had left all of them in a song. They all knew that the next several months were going to be spent treating Kaz enough like glass to soothe their own worries while not enough that he would snap at them.

Matthias was very careful when he opened the backdoor to their home before he reminded himself that Koshak had gone with Inej and Nina to Ravka. He closed the door tightly behind himself and then walked further into the house. He dumped his exercise equipment where it belonged in the mudroom before he stepped into the kitchen. He was searching through one of the cupboards for his favorite cup so that he could have some water when he felt another body press up against his back. A while ago, that would have made him feel so aggressively overstimulated that he wouldn’t have been able to handle it. Enough time had passed that he knew that it was his husband and what was going to happen.

An ungloved hand pressed onto one of his shoulders while lips kissed at the other. Kaz rasped, “You’re going to drive me insane.”

“That was certainly not my intention, karaste,” Matthias chuckled. He turned around and his hands easily settled down onto his husband’s hips to bring him closer. “I was simply giving you a show to keep you entertained.”

“Well I can think of something else that I would prefer entertain me,” Kaz grinned. Now that they were facing each other, he let his bare hand slowly trail down Matthias’ shoulder and abs down to where his pants were barely clinging to his hips.

The taller of the two men resisted the urge to grin maniacally. That was exactly what he had wanted to happen when he went outside to workout that morning. He could barely contain himself as he reached out and took hold of Kaz’s hips, which gave him the ability to lean down and connect their lips in a very passionate kiss.

Carefully, he let his hands slip around the back of Kaz’s hips so that his palms were pressed to the perky ass hidden beneath another pair of perfectly tailored trousers. He gave a cheeky squeeze before he let himself continue down to hold onto Kaz’s thighs. The other was able to pick up on what he was doing almost immediately, so Matthias lifted his partner up into the air and then turned them around so that he could place his husband down onto the counter. The kiss didn’t break even for a second while he was doing that, both of them meeting together over and over again.

He only stopped when he could feel himself beginning to get lightheaded from the effort that it took to keep the kisses going without taking a breath. “Is it okay if I fuck you right here?”

Usually Matthias was a lot more chaste when he spoke about sex, years of repression and purity culture telling his mind that it was indecent to say such things even though he was already going against those teachings by being married to so many people at once. He was riled up enough that he could barely think about the teachings that had been enforced in him for as long as he could remember, though.

“Of course it is. I would have waited for you to come find me in the bedroom if I was having a bad pain day,” Kaz snarked.

Matthias drank the words in like he was a dying man and Kaz was air. He used to hate the way that the Kerch man spoke, the vile bitterness that was pumped into every word feeling like a poison to his already fragile mind. Now he loved it more than he knew was possible. He longed for the dirty words and bitter musings whenever they were away from each other for a few hours. This time the words made him smirk. His hands moved to begin undoing the front of his husband’s pants as he said, “So ravishing me was an inevitability?”

“Of course it was. I’ve been so horny since you knocked me up that I got off in the office of the Crow Club last week,” he grumbled.

The idea of his dear husband sitting behind his desk, one gloved hand plunged down the front of his pants while lewd noises emitted from his dripping wet cunt was enough to make Matthias speed up the process. 

He nearly ripped the fabric when it wasn’t getting off of the pale thighs he wanted to sink between fast enough. Once it was finally off, his breath caught in his throat and he spent a long moment looking at the curls of neatly trimmed dark hair resting just underneath the barely changed curve of Kaz’s stomach.

“You’re not wearing anything under your trousers already? Should have made sure to knock you up when we first met,” he mumbled as he began to work on the ties of his own pants, only to find that his husband’s nimble fingers had already taken care of that. He was sure not to mention the pregnancies that they had lost on the way to getting to where they were now, since it would kill the mood immediately.

“Shit, if I had known that me getting knocked up would have made you this horny I would have let you,” Kaz groaned. They both knew that it wasn’t true since they had hated each other when they first met, but neither of them were going to say that.

As soon as they were both nude from the waist down, Matthias slotted himself back between his husband’s legs again. He curved the leg with the good knee around his waist to keep him in place and then bracketed Kaz in with his hands against the counter. Their lips met in another tender kiss as he pressed forward and into his lover with practiced precision. He gasped when he felt the slick wetness and heat waiting for him with every inch that he pressed inside.

“Oh, oh fuck, Matthias,” Kaz groaned when the other man bottomed out so that he was completely full. He looked debauched already and they had only been going for a little while. It was enough to make Matthias want to go entirely feral, ripping Kaz apart with his teeth and sharp thrusts. That was going to have to wait for another time because he was going to take his time while they fucked, he had already decided that when he went outside that morning.

As soon as they had both adjusted to the new flood of sensations that were overcoming them, Matthias slowly pulled out and then pressed back in. He knew that Kaz liked to be held down against every surface and used almost like a toy when he was having his good days, but Matthias was so excited about the little potential life that had burrowed its way into the famed Dirtyhands that his thrusts were slow and worshipful.

He felt a hand reach up to his shoulder, fingernails digging into the skin and muscle there. He was worried that he was going to lose all control if Kaz ended up begging him like he always did, but his mind was immediately snapped out of that line of thought. Kaz whimpered and said, “I need you to stop.”

Matthias pulled out and took a step back from his lover almost immediately. He knew what it was like to get overwhelmed from touch without a phobia coming into play, so he could only guess how much worse it was with one. He held his hands out to the side so that Kaz could see them and knew that he wasn’t going to advance forward again.

What Matthias was met with again surprised him. Kaz looked down to the space between his legs and then let out a startled sob when he saw the sticky crimson that was beginning to spread between onto the counter.

“Love, what happened? Are you alright?” Matthias asked. He looked down and saw that his cock was also streaked with the sticky material, which reminded him of the time that Nina had started her period in the middle of them having sex. Given that Kaz was pregnant, the period was a non-option, but that meant that the blood was being caused by something else entirely.

“I’m sorry, I’m so sorry,” Kaz whispered as tears began to streak down his face.

They were both aware of what was happening, they both knew it and neither of them were able to admit it out loud. Saying the words would make it all the more real and that felt more damning than the blood that was slowly seeping out of Kaz. All of their hopes and dreams were spilling in crimson, just like they had thought that they would when Matthias had a bullet lodged in his shoulder and broken aspirations in his mind.

This time, he was not the broken eighteen-year-old boy that he had been back then. He leaned forward and pressed their foreheads together. He didn’t bother to try and dress again since it would only ruin his clothing. He was going to have to strip out of it again when he got them to the bathroom. “It’s alright, it’s alright,” he murmured as he pressed gentle kisses to Kaz’s forehead.

He brought them up to the bathroom and then lowered Kaz down into the tub. He took a cloth from under the sink and washed them both off before he got Kaz a pair of the underthings that he wore when he was on his cycle so that they could track the blood, just like they had done with the last three miscarriages. 

He had just settled Kaz down into bed when the other turned to the side so that he was looking at his husband. Matthias felt his heart break a thousand times over in his chest and he had to ask, “Did I do this?”

“No, I was having cramps yesterday. I assumed that it was normal, I lasted so much longer than I had with all of the other ones,” Kaz whispered. “I broke the hopes of everyone again… you were all so excited to finally be parents.”

Matthias realized he shouldn’t have brought up his own guilt to the person that was going through the most pain in the situation. He brushed Kaz’s hair to the side with a slightly trembling hand and said, “It will happen, Kaz. One day we will have a child. No one is going to blame you for what happened, it was simply not the right time.”

---

5. Wylan

He didn’t work in his lab as much as he did before. Despite his rampant protestations to the contrary, Wylan did like making bombs and whatever other chemical compound Kaz required for his newest job. The compounds made sense and the rush of being able to control that much destruction was enough to make him forget about the weakness that had been assigned to him for so much of his life. With the combination of his Merchant responsibilities and having as many high-maintenance partners as he did, he barely got the time to spend with the bombs as he used to.

Today was one of the rare times that he was basically alone in the mansion, while also having no work to do for the empire that he had inherited from his father. That meant that he got to do what he pleased, and this time he chose to experiment with some of the powders and chemicals that Kaz had gotten him for his birthday. Nina and Matthias were meeting with some of her old teachers in the Embassy, Jesper and Inej were staking out a new brothel that they were working to take down, and Kaz was going back and forth between the house and his clubs for business meetings. Wylan missed his partners, but he was excited that he got that time by himself.

He heard the door behind him open slightly and assumed that it was Koshak since the cat hated being alone. Inej had originally gotten him to keep the mice out of her vessel, but she became very attached to her little companion. They were in the process of socializing the creature with dogs so that Matthias could have a pet of his own.

He turned his head and then startled slightly when he saw that it was not, in fact, his wife’s cat but rather one of his husbands. Kaz was standing in the doorway to Wylan’s laboratory with a rather pained looked on his face. His suit was still immaculate, tailored lines making him look angular and dangerous in a way that got them all very riled up. He had his gloves securely on over his hands even though they were back in their own home, which meant that it was one of the days were he was feeling too overwhelmed for even his partners to touch him. He was also leaning very heavily on his cane.

“Kaz!” Wylan gasped, adrenaline rushing through his system from seeing a figure much bigger than what he had been expecting. He set down the vials that he had been toying with and then stripped off his work gloves. He also removed the goggles that were not serving a purpose other than keep his red-brown curls out of his eyes. “I thought that you were going to be working today.”

“I was,” he replied. His voice was tight, like he was hiding something that was upsetting him.

Wylan carefully brushed his hands off on the cloth that had been resting next to his chemicals on his work table. He didn’t technically need to be doing that because what he had been working with wasn’t that dangerous and he was wearing gloves when the was touching it, but it gave him something to do. He always struggled to figure out how to move around Kaz when either of them were too overstimulated to be touched. He understood the emotion since he had experienced it enough himself, but he was so awkward and malformed when it came to being in a relationship with anyone.

“Oh,” he nodded. Something about the energy of the room had changed when his husband entered. It was making him feel a lot more like he did when Jesper first came to get him from the tannery so that he could make bombs for them for the job that they did in Ravka. His stomach was tied up in knots and his hands were beginning to get shaky with worry. “Um, not that I don’t love being around you, but why are you here?” He did adore his partner almost more than life itself, but it was rare for Kaz to come all the way up to Wylan’s lab and even rarer for him to come in and then stay there.

Kaz walked from where he had been standing near the doorway to the little seating area that Wylan had next to his worktable. It was supposed to be so that he had more places to sit down when he was being flighty, but Jesper and Nina primarily used it to take meals with him when he was too distracted to come down to the dining room for dinner. Slowly, the man lowered himself down into the seat, though Wylan was unable to miss the wince on his face.

“D-do you need more pain meds?” he asked as he fluttered over to the edge of the table. Something had shifted in his husband so that Kaz felt almost completely unrecognizable to who he had been that morning, his face unreadable and his body language stiff.

“I’m not sure that I can have medication in my present condition,” he replied, tilting his head down towards his lap so that he didn’t have to meet Wylan’s eyes.

The cryptic way that he was speaking was enough to get the other man to pause. The anxiety began to drain from his system now that he had a puzzle that he could help riddle out. He set the cloth that he had been grasping down next to him and then settled himself at the table. He traced one of the grains in the table just so that he wouldn’t have to look up at his husband as he asked, “Are you pregnant?”

“I might not be for much longer, unless you have something to help me,” he said, his voice rasping even more since he was speaking quietly.

Wylan’s mind stopped and then jumped to the next thought all at once, so quickly that he almost gave himself whiplash. The thought of them getting another chance at being parents when the last pregnancy that had been announced to them had ended far before its time was exciting. He was also terrified of the idea that Kaz was expecting out of the three members of their polycule because he was the one that had been through the most out of them all concerning that kind of loss. It took him a moment to process the fact that Kaz had just admitted that he was pregnant after the fight that he had with Inej the morning before when she had asked him. He then finally caught up to the present when he realized that Kaz was asking him to make something that would chemically stop another miscarriage.

“Oh, love,” he whispered. He wanted to reach across the table so that he could take his spouse’s hand but he knew that it wasn’t the day for that. “I… I’ve never heard of something that can stop a body from rejecting a pregnancy. I don’t think that I have the stuff to make it even if I had.”

“Then just the painkiller is fine. Leave it outside of my room when you finish,” Kaz said briskly. He pushed himself up from the desk and silently walked out of the room, leaning even heavier onto his cane than he had before. 

Wylan didn’t take it personally. He had seen Kaz go through four miscarriages before and knew the drill at this point. Even if Kaz was simply anticipating losing the baby before he actually had, he was going to be going through that same cycle of grief that he had every time before. Wylan got up so that he could move aside the explosives that he had been working with so that he could get make what was asked of him.

By the time that he was able to get the bottle up to his husband, there was a pair of blood stained pants sitting on top of Kaz’s dresser with his husband curled around a hot water bottle. The pain reliever was the only thing that he could do to help, so after he dropped off the first batch he went downstairs back to his lab so that he could make another.

---

+1 Kaz

He thought that his partners were never actually going to pack up and leave. They all had something that they were supposed to be doing out of the house that day. Normally that would bother him, but today he wanted them gone. He also knew where they were all going and was sure that they would send someone back to the house to tell him if plans changed so that he could find them if he had need. 

Matthias was going to be visiting a local breeder so that he could pick out a puppy or work with the dogs, whichever ended up working out best for him. Wylan had a meeting with a couple of interested investors but nothing serious enough that he had to bring someone else along. Nina was going to be spending some time with the friends that she had made while working at the White Rose, which meant that she was going to be coming home with a new dress. Inej and Jesper were going out on their monthly date to their favorite cafe and then likely to a bookstore so that Inej could pick something new out for her upcoming voyage. Kaz himself was supposed to be heading into work so that he could finish up the tax paperwork for the new Barrel empire that he had been shaping up since the day before.

He knew that wasn’t going to happen. He had been trying to get as much work done as possible before what inevitably was going to happen ended up happening, though it was turning out to be a little different than he had expected.

Kaz hadn’t necessarily meant to keep his pregnancy a secret from his partners. He also hadn’t meant to tell them about it, but he was half expecting someone to force it out of him. Inej had known every other time he had ended up pregnant, sometimes even before he did, afterall. He wasn’t not telling them about his pregnancy out of some sort of malice, but rather because he was terrified of seeing the disappointment on their faces when he miscarried again.

He had been pregnant five times before and none of them had even lasted long enough for him to pass something that resembled a baby when he started miscarrying. Every single time that had happened, he had to deal with the sorrowful looks that his partners wore when they tried to take care of him and the grief that they carried about the disappointment he had handed them. He wasn’t sure that he would be able to handle that again, and so he had actively worked to keep his pregnancy hidden as soon as he noticed that he had missed one of his cycles.

It had started while Inej was out on her ship, which meant that the person most likely to notice that something was off with him was gone. It had been easier to hide the cravings and increase in appetite, especially since he didn’t have any morning sickness. The exhaustion and increase in libido had been harder to pass off but Jesper and Nina were excited enough to nap with or fuck him that they were able to subsconsciously help the others brush it away as well.

He found that even when he passed from the first trimester into the second, his body hadn’t changed all that much. He had put on a bit of weight but blamed it all on Matthias’ increase in baking to put off his stress about getting a new dog soon. Even when Kaz finally got to the blessed third trimester, his belly had only swelled ever so slightly. He had regressed back into not letting his partners touch him more than a few brief kisses or hand holding when he got to that point because he knew that if they felt his belly they would feel the butterfly-wing movements of the baby inside of him or the rounded nature of his torso.

Kaz really had meant to tell them when he finally passed the first trimester. He had been secretly seeing a midwife to make sure that everything in the pregnancy was going smoothly and she had informed him that was when the ‘danger zone’ passed. He had meant to tell them for the last five months, but every time he opened his mouth to say it all he could see was blood covering his underthings and their sad faces.

So he had kept it a secret, trying to figure out ways that he could explain the sudden appearance of a child that none of them had known he was carrying or find another way that was easier to inform them of their upcoming parenthood. Nothing had come up and now he feared that it was too late, though he was also in denial about that.

He had gone to bed the night before feeling a tiny bit out of sorts. It was mostly a foggy head and vague cramping in his stomach, but that also could have been because he had no appetite that entire day and had thus barely eaten anything. When he woke up the next morning he had felt even stranger than he had when he went to sleep, but he wasn’t willing to show any of those symptoms until his partners had finally left.

Once he was alone, he slipped from his bed and walked to the mirror hanging in the corner of his room. He looked himself over to make sure that he was presentable and his belly wasn’t noticeable in the suit that he had had chosen for his meetings that day as he got ready to head down to the club. For a reason beyond him, he was still planning to go to work despite his anxiety around his pregnancy the night before.

He got to the top of the stairs that would lead down to the rest of the house before he had to stop. It was an almost overwhelming feeling when he finally let his brain process what was happening. There was a stark pressure building up along his spine before it spread out through the rest of his hips so that it was hugging his entire pelvis. It shifted into bone-shattering pain only when it wrapped around the front of his stomach.

It wasn’t the first time that he had a contraction, he had several practice ones that the midwife he was seeing had warned him about. They were very similar to what had happened when he was miscarrying but more intense. The contraction that he was currently experiencing was like the practice ones had been ramped up to ten and like the cramps he had with his other five pregnancies times twenty.

It left him winded and leaning on his cane so that he didn’t sink down to the ground. When his mind finally returned to him, the only thing that he could think about was the panic he had felt when he realized that he was losing his pregnancies the last several times that he had conceived. All he could think about was blood and gore and the sorrow that came with knowing that he was too bad and too monstrous to actually bring good life into the world.

He decided against going into work that day. He turned around and slowly made his way back to his bedroom so that he could change into a fresh pair of sleep things. He laid down on the bed with his back propped up with half of the pillows they kept spread out on the master bed. He wasn’t sure what was happening but he knew that he had to be in the safest place that they had in their entire house.  

About seven minutes had passed before he got another one of the pains. By that point, his panic had ceded enough that he was able to realize what was happening. It made him anxious to think that he could be in labor before he had the chance to tell his partners that he was even pregnant, but the thing that scared him more was the fact that it was about a month too early.

He had heard of babies being born early and then nursed into full health by their parents, but he had also heard of babies that were born looking raw and red and without breath because they were far too small. Part of him was worried that he had gotten his dates wrong even though the midwife had assured him that everything was alright. He didn’t know what was going to be waiting for him at the end of his labor, but he did know that he was going to be facing everything alone.

Kaz relaxed back into the bed and tried to keep his mind about him so that he didn’t lose himself when his child needed him. His thoughts eventually began to drift over the past few months as he started mourning the things that he could have shared with his partners, the things that he had denied both them and himself from having with his own fear. 

He could have been worshiped and waited on the same way that Alys had been when they kidnapped her by Matthias, who was always eager to cherish them. He could have told Nina about his cravings and had her fatten him up even more with her delicious cooking. He could have sat with Inej in front of him while she rubbed that oil that her parents had brought them when they heard that they were trying for a family during one of their visits. He could have slept in Jesper’s arm as the zowa sang Kaelish nursery rhymes to his belly. He could have sat with Wylan while they both worked, helping each other get thing squared away so that they could enjoy the first couple of months with their baby without the panic of work on top of it. He could have watched Matthias build the baby’s first cradle. He could have spent days with Wylan discussing traditional Kerch names. He could have cuddled with Inej while they both napped during her adjustment back from sea life. He could have taken long walks with Nina in the garden while she told him all about the place that she had come from. He could have watched Jesper struggle to make their child’s first soother.

But he had denied himself and them all of those things because he had been too afraid to tell them that he was pregnant simply because he didn’t want to let them down again. By refusing to give them that disappointment, he had offered himself another by keeping the baby a secret to himself.

He was basically writhing on the bed by the time that the noonday sun began to creep over the slanted rooves of Ketterdam. He had started crying while imagining how his pregnancy would have gone if he had trusted that information to his partners, and he hadn’t been able to stop when the pains overcame him.

Kaz had tried to stand up and sway against the bed like his midwife had encouraged when they had talked about what would happen while he gave birth. He found that whatever position his little one had taken was playing games with his hip and he was basically imobile from it, so was stuck in the bed. 

Eventually he was overcome with a rush of energy and had to move around. He grabbed his cane and began to pace up and down the hall while leaning heavily on it and the wall on the other side. He paused every time that he had a contraction, letting his head rest on the cool plaster. It was one of the only things that brought him any relief. His entire body felt hotter than a fever, but without the cool sweats that made him feel clammy. His stomach was clenching around the nothing that he had eaten and his mouth was dry with panic. His hand couldn’t stop moving to his stomach when he was having a contraction, trying to feel any movement from the baby that would reassure him that they were okay.

“Shit, shit, shit,” he swore as he leaned heavily against the wall when a particularly strong contraction chose that exact moment to try and make him feel horrible. He leaned so heavily against the wall that he was basically sliding down it. But then there was the feeling of relief that came whenever the pain left him, right before something splashed along the floor and soaked through his pants.

He stared down at his toes that were now soaked with clear fluid, blinking a couple times when the only thing that his brain was able to bring up was blood and viscera.

His labor was steadily progressing now, even though it was a month early and he was completely alone. He certainly wouldn’t be seen walking the streets of Ketterdam while moving into the second stage of labor and he had no one that he could send to his midwife, not that any of them would know where she was working. His water breaking only confirmed the thing that he had half been denying, so he stripped off his pants and his smalls and left them in the hallway over the top of the puddle because he didn’t have the energy or ability to lean down and clean it up properly.

When he got back to his room, he continued his pacing. He was restless, almost like a caged animal in the back of a zoo or a royal palace. He was surrounded by gold and opulence but he didn’t have the one thing that he really needed, companionship.

After his water had broken his labor began to progress even faster than it had before. He could barely walk at all now that the pains were coming less than five minutes apart. He knew what it was to be so sick that pain was the only thing that he felt, and he had been scared that labor would be similar to that every time he had gotten pregnant. Now that he was in the midst of it, he knew that the sensations were completely different and the only thing that he could see in his mind’s eye was his babe.

Kaz hiked himself up onto the bed when his knee began to scream at him, informing him that the pacing had to stop if he wanted to be able to walk normally for the next week. He wasn’t sure that he would be able to do that regardless, but he was okay with laying down because he was beginning to get tired. He leaned back against the pillows that smelled like his partners, allowing his brain to drift off into the thought of them surrounding him like he so desperately wanted.

“Shit, fuck, ow,” he swore when he felt the babe he had been secretly carrying begin to shift lower down inside of him. It was only just then dawning on him that it was all real and happening right then, and that he had no control over it. Fear overwhelmed him so that his breathing was rapid and his heart felt like it was trying to break through is ribcage. He could barely stop the tears that were running down his face as he grasped at the bedsheets with his ungloved hands. He wanted his parents, his brother, his spouses, anyone to be there with him and reassure him that he was going to be okay.

The urge to push started to overwhelm him just as the day began to creep into evening, which was when his partners were allegedly going to be coming home. Inej and Jesper were likely going to come home last unless one of them got worn out. Wylan and Matthias were both a toss up about when they were arriving, but Kaz was honestly surprised that Nina wasn’t back yet.

As soon as he felt the urge he knew that he had to give into it. He was usually so good about controlling his body and what it did that it wasn’t a concern what he wanted, just what he had to do. This time there was no question about what he was going to do, so he placed both of his hands on the top of the headboard and began to push so hard that his body curled forward over his tiny baby bump.

When the urge passed and he had no more strength, he collapsed back against the bed and panted so that he could get desperately needed air. He could feel his arms shaking with the force that it took to keep himself in one place.

He was so tired and so scared. The only thing that he wanted was his partners by his side, to tell him that he was doing well and give him their strength. The images of a happy, gurgling baby and happy spouses interacting with their firstborn had been replaced by angry faces and a limp body. It only served to scare him more. He wanted to go back and correct all of the mistakes that had made, to tell them that he was pregnant so at least he wouldn’t have to go through the traumatic loss of his sixth baby on his own.

He knew that he couldn’t hand them the pain of having missed his pregnancy and helping him through a stillbirth instead of a miscarriage. He hadn’t given them any of the joy of seeing the minute changes of his body as their baby grew or letting them feel the baby move, so he didn’t deserve the comfort they would provide him. The thought of not getting to have them made a pain erupt in his chest that was more intense than even his contractions.

His attention was brought back to his labor and his baby when another contraction wrapped around his belly. He grunted as he leaned forward and pushed as hard as he could to try and make as much progress as he could. He felt the baby inside of him slowly moving down further into the birth canal. 

His mind began to scream at him to call for help so that he at least had someone else with him when he heard the door at the front of their home open. He could tell by the pace of the footsteps that it was Matthias, but he was walking slower than he normally did. The part of Kaz’s mind that was always looking for the most information he could get to help keep him safe was able to process the fact that he had a dog with him. He had to physically bite the insides of his cheeks until he tasted hot, coppery blood seeping from his tongue and gums to resist the urge to call out to him. He wasn’t going to ruin the happiness that Matthias had just earned by getting another canine companion with a dead baby.

A sob escaped Kaz’s mouth when he leaned back against the bed so that he could try to catch his breath again. He felt almost as if he were drowning, like he was never actually going to be able to overcome the agony that he was in while trying to birth a human.

He could hear Matthias moving to the living room, his deep voice reverberating through the home while he talked to his new companion. Kaz briefly wondered if he would talk to his child that same way but with different affectionate nicknames, or if he would want to speak to them like an adult. 

The contractions kept relentlessly coming and Kaz kept pushing. He heard the door open again before he had made any more progress and then Nina’s voice joined in with Matthias. They were both laughing and shouting at each other and the dog, but in the way that meant they were overly excited and had lost the ability to control their volume instead of being upset with one another.

Kaz’s entire body was shaking with the force he was exerting to not only birth their child but to hold himself back from calling out to them. He could almost feel the way that Matthias would hold him in his strong arms, helping him bend forward. He could almost feel Nina’s calm hands moping the sweat that was running down his forehead off of him. He wanted them so badly that his entire chest felt hollow with the ache and yet he refused to let himself have it.

He had to move to make more progress, so he painfully raised himself onto his hands and knees and then into a squatting position while grasping the rails of the headboard to support himself. “Please, baby, please,” he begged, though at this point he had thoroughly convinced himself that the lack of movement meant that he had once again lost his child. He wanted to wail and scream in pain as he pushed down hard enough to get the head to come to his opening, spreading him wide so that all of the nerves down there burned with the fire of nothing he had ever felt before.

When he gasped and stopped pushing, surprised by the pain, all of the progress he had just made left. He felt like crying when he felt the sliver of his baby’s head slip back into him. His entire body was quivering with effort and aching with hurt but he was going to get no relief. He must have pushed without any change for about ten minutes before he got the entire head to crown. He had collapsed down so that he was kneeling instead of squatting at that point, but he released one of his shaking hands from the headboard so that he could touch the slimy, blood-covered downy hair on the top of his baby’s head.

His heart was already mourning the loss of the child once he did, he knew that it was temporary. This baby was not going to last, just as the other one’s hadn’t. He was doomed to never create anything good, to be a monster that could only bring forth pain and misery. He knew that Inej and Nina would tell him that he was being stupid, that Wylan would reassure him that he could make great things happen, that Jesper would give him that sad look, and that Matthias would just kiss his forehead and say that demons did not look like him. He wanted them with him so badly, but he knew that he couldn’t have them no matter how badly he wanted it.

That pain was amplified to the point that he started crying again when he heard the door open. He wanted the others to be waiting for Wylan so that they could tell him the happy news, that they were moments away from being parents, but instead he had to listen to them ask him about work as if Kaz were an intruder in his own house. He knew that he had to be quieter now that one of the more aware people had returned. Nina was a spy and could hear things easier, as was Inej, but Wylan had had to listen for his father and danger at all times so was more attuned to noises than the rest of the polycule was.

He was trying to push while staying absolutely silent, but he almost felt like the effort that he was expending on keeping himself quiet meant that he was making less progress than he had before. He was in so much pain, he just wanted the entire process to be over with. He couldn’t move out of the position that he was in despite the red hot burning pain that was spreading through his body from where his knee had been bent for too long.

On the floor below, the door opened and his last two partners came home. Everyone that he loved and cherished that was still loving was now in his home and he had no way to reach out to them for help. He knew that he could scream and shout and they would come running, but the pain was swirling together with the panic in his brain so that he felt so vulnerable he thought that he would disintegrate into nothing. He also couldn’t ruin the joy that Jesper and Inej had brought with them, both of them laughing happily. It was the laugh that he could get drunk on, the one that made him feel safe and warm and happy, the one that he would sooner kill himself than cause to disappear.

He was certain that forcing Inej to see him go through another grisly, bloody loss like the one he was sure he was about to face would be enough to strip the rest of the joy from her life. So he kept his jaw clenched so tight that he was going to crack his teeth and kept pushing to try and finish the ugly process that he was embarking on.

Kaz gave a grunt of discomfort as he pushed again and the head slipped entirely from him and into his waiting hand. He kept it there while he shifted positions so that he was laying back against the bed. He wracked his mind with the panic of a man being hunted for sport while he tried to remember everything that the midwife had said about that stage of the delivery.

Finally, he was able to connect what it was and ran his fingers around the base of the baby’s neck to check for the cord. There was nothing, but he was given the overwhelming sensation of feeling their little face for the first time. His hand moved almost reverently down across a tiny nose and a little puckered mouth, then two eyes that were still closed.

He was barely aware of the sounds out in the hall where he had left his bottoms when his water broke and then hurried footsteps coming towards his office. He jumped slightly when he heard two doors bang open and his partners calling his name throughout their massive house. He had to ignore it as the urge to push overwhelmed him again and he had to listen to it. He kept his hand underneath the head of the baby as he let out a small, strangled noise.

The door to the grand bedroom opened just as he gave a final push and the baby was born. He was quivering like a leaf in the world’s worst storm, his hair was caked to his forehead with sweat, and fluids from the delivery a babe were now covering his bottom half and their bed. He could barely think about any of that as he held his tiny little one in his hand and stared straight ahead at his partners.

Inej was leading the charge with Nina right behind her, peaking over her shoulder at what was happening. Wylan was standing beside Inej with his face as pale as paper and his mouth covered with one of his delicate hands. Jesper was holding onto Matthias like he was going to fall over, his eyes as wide as saucers. 

“What is that?” Jesper asked, astounded and terrified.

“A baby,” Kaz replied weakly. There were no cries, no movement from the little limp body in his hands. He had known that it was coming, but it was still too much. He didn’t know how he was supposed to handle the overwhelming surge of energy in the room when his partners had piled into the space and the death of the fist baby that had actually been able to hold.

“Kaz-” Inej started.

She was cut off by their wife shoving past her and into the room. Nina stopped by the edge of the bed and then carefully reached down so that she was holding the baby. “Matthias, go and get me some hot water from the tap in the kitchen. Wylan, I need you to find as many towels as possible. Inej get me the suture kit,” she commanded as she took the baby. She sounded every bit the trained soldier that she had been when they first met her.

“She’s not crying, Nina, she’s not crying,” Kaz sobbed. He had lost so many people before, and yet he hadn’t known that it was possible to experience grief like the kind that was currently washing over him. There would have been a time that he wouldn’t have thought twice about a dead baby in the streets, just focused on his own rage. It was so different when it was his own child, the one that he had longed for with his entire heart and soul.

“Shh, shh, it’s okay. Babies take a little bit of time to perk up sometimes,” Nina soothed easily. She knelt down on the edge of the bed so that the cord didn’t have to stretch between Kaz and the baby quite as much as before. She then placed one of her fingers into the baby’s mouth with a scooping motion towards her little throat. 

The entire house went completely silent as they heard the tiniest cough and then the shrill cry of a baby who had been through something terrifying. 

Wylan had stopped in the doorway, his pale face flush with exertion as he looked on to their eldest daughter taking her first deep breaths. Inej had returned with the suture kit and was smiling so wide that her cheeks had to hurt. Downstairs, Matthias could be heard whooping loudly as he no doubt cued in to what that sound meant. Jesper let out a little broken noise as he staggered over to the edge of the bed and looked down at the tiny face of their babe. 

“There we are, there we are,” Nina crooned as she carefully cradled the newborn in her arms. “Kaz, we’ve gotta put her on your chest while we get everything settled out. Are you okay with that?”

“Please,” he nodded so quickly and eagerly that his head actually dizzy because of it. He barely registered what was happening when he got pushed forward by Jesper’s calloused hands so that they could remove the shirt from his pale body, which revealed the tiny bump that he had been sporting in secrets for months. Neither of his present partners said anything about it as Nina carefully moved the newborn so that she was laying against Kaz’s chest.

His entire world shrank down to her like he knew that it would if he ever got the chance to have an actual child. She was grimy with mucus, blood, and vernix, but she was so utterly perfect that he couldn’t believe that she was really there. Her skin was as pale as his had been, but there was the chance that it could darken as she got older. Her tiny body was still curled into a tight ball against his skin even though she had already been born. Her little legs were tucked up into her stomach and he could feel the feet that had been battering his kidneys for months pressed against his lower belly with ten perfect little toes in a line. Her arms were close to her face, wiping at herself while she cried. She had wispy black hair and likely blue eyes, but those were also things that would change when she moved out of the newborn stage. Even the idea that she would eventually move out of that phase of her life sent a thrill of joy throughout his body.

“I’ve got you, Papa’s got you,” he whispered quietly to the newborn now cradled in his arms. She soothed when she felt the vibration of his voice against her tiny body, likely remembering it from when she was inside of him only moments prior.

“Love, this is very important, have you been going to see a midwife?” Nina asked. She had taken the suture kit from Inej so that she could tie the cord off in two spots and then cut it, which allowed Wylan to carefully take the newborn so that he could wash her with the warm water Matthias had just brought upstairs in their biggest pot.

“Yeah,” Kaz nodded sleepily. His entire body ached like nothing else, but he knew that he was safe because his partners were there and his baby was crying.

“Thank the Saints,” Jesper whispered from the spot that he had taken up behind his husband. Kaz barely even remembered him moving back there but he was so happy that he had. He wished that was the place that Jesper could have been during his entire labor and birth process. “Hate to think about the pain you might have gone through all on your own if you actually hadn’t told anybody.”

“I’m sorry,” Kaz whispered morosely. He was, truly and deeply. He had wanted them to share the moments of his pregnancy that he had rejoiced after, but he had let fear reign over him the same way that he had after Jordie’s death. He whimpered and shied away from his own body when he felt another small cramp and then something wet and slippery move out of him. 

Nina soothed him with a gentle hand on his knee. “Just the afterbirth love. The entire thing is out now so this is really over. I’m going to check to make sure you didn’t tear anything too badly and then have Nej sew you up,” she explained. The two woman worked in tandem like a well-oiled machine as they got him fixed.

As soon as they had finished, Jesper’s lanky arms wrapped around his knees and his back as they shuffled towards the edge of the bed. “Come on, my love, we’re going to get you into something clean. Do you want a bath?”

The idea of having to be submerged into water after thinking that he was to be surrounded by death in the same way almost made him vomit. He focused on swallowing down the bile and giving his head a strict shake. “Okay, no bath,” Jesper said softly. Instead, he settled his lover down on the chest at the end of their bed. Matthias and Wylan worked together so that they could strip the bed and replace the sheets with the emergency set that they kept just under the frame. Kaz felt bad for ruining such expensive items with his ignorance of just how messy birth was, but he could barely focus on that. 

Jesper took a wet towel and began in the messiest part of his lover. He cleaned off the blood that was caked between his legs, along with all the fluids that had dribbled through his smalls when his water broke. As soon as he had done that, Inej appeared with a pair of the period smalls that belonged to him. She and Jesper worked together to get Kaz’s hips tilted up enough that they could slip the garment over his wrecked body. They were soft and compressive enough that he felt grounded, to the point where he began listening for the sounds of his baby.

Kaz had turned his head to the side so that he could look for the newborn girl while Jesper finished up his work, ridding Kaz of the sweat that was sticking to his skin. He smiled and relaxed softly when he saw Nina speaking delicately to the baby in hushed tones that he couldn’t hear from his distance as she got the makeshift nappy pinned into place.

He was dressed in a soft pair of cotton pants and then one of his sleep shirts before he was placed back down onto their blissfully clean bed. The others were still whirling around the room as they got into the process of soaking the blood and fluids out of the sheets, as well as disposing of the suture kit that they had used to clean him up. He could barely pay attention to any of that as his body finally got the chance that it needed to relax.

His world turned miniscule again when his daughter was carefully placed back into his arms. Nina knelt beside the bed so that she was looking over her husband’s shoulder at the baby. “She’s going to need to be fed. Are you comfortable with doing that?”

Despite the panic that he still got at times when his own partners touched him, there was something different about having his baby pressed up against his warm skin. He hypothesized, in the back of his very tired mind, that it was because she was a part of him. He had wanted her so desperately when she was growing in the safety of his belly that all he could think about was how much he wanted to keep her safe. The lapping of water at his ankles wasn’t something that even crossed his mind.

“I can do that,” he mumbled. Awkwardly, he shuffled forward so that he could lift up his shirt and help his babe find his nipple. By the time that she had gotten the hang of suckling and was greedily drinking down her first meal, everyone else had finished what they were doing. Inej and Wylan were sitting at the end of the bed, their hands clasped together but every other part of their body separated from the other. Jesper and Matthias had made their way up onto the bed so that they bracketed Kaz and their baby in, keeping them both safe from the outside world. Nina was fussing slightly but eventually got dragged down into the bed by their husband so that she also had to be still.

“Why didn’t you tell us, Kaz?” Inej asked, her voice small and slightly scared. Kaz wasn’t sure what she wanted the answer to be or what she was expecting, but he was so tired that the only thing he could say was the truth.

“I wanted to. I wanted to tell you all the second I noticed that my cycle was a week late, but I couldn’t. I couldn’t bear the thought of you all getting to excited about the potential to be parents just to have my body kill off that hope because nothing good can ever happen to me. I… I wanted you to be there for all the parts of the pregnancy but then I was just so scared,” he didn’t realize that he was crying until his daughter let out a tiny, fussing noise.

“Sorry, sorry baby,” he mumbled as he wiped the tear from her head. He leaned into the touch that Jesper offered to him, curling into the warmth and protection that it offered.

Wylan reached out to offer Kaz a blanket so that they could burp the baby as he said, “We’re not mad at you, Kaz. We’re all a little bit scared and shocked that this suddenly happened because I don’t think that anyone even realized that you were pregnant, but we’re not mad.”

“We could never be mad when we have this,” Matthias whispered reverently. Kaz had always known that Inej and Matthias were going to be the best parents out of all of them since they had the longest to go without trauma and the nervousness that came with everything Jesper did. It still made him feel like he was melting when he watched his husband’s huge hand brush over the top of their baby’s head, though.

The others gave a murmur of agreement. As soon as the baby had finished her first meal and been burped, he wrapped her up in the blanket that Jesper had found in between helping Kaz get cleaned up and settling into the bed. Matthias was the first to hold her, but she made her rounds with every one of her parents so that they could all meet her for the first time. Kaz kept himself awake so that he could savor those first few moments of her life, reassuring himself that she was okay every time he saw a blissfully pink nose or heard a little gurgle of discontent when she was shifted the wrong way.

She had finally landed back where she belonged in his arms when Nina asked, “What are you going to name her?”

Despite having thought about so many things when she was carefully hidden away in his belly, a name had never crossed his mind. He had so many names that were assigned to him through his life, from the one that his mother had given him to the one that he had chosen when he was five and figured out he was a boy, to the last name that he had chosen after Jordie died. “I… I like the name Posey but if any of you have something that you need to name her then we can also do that.”

“I like Posey. It’s a good Kerch name, in between the stupid upper class names and the peasant ones. Gives her opportunity to do a lot in her life,” Wylan grinned.

“Posey,” Inej whispered softly as she moved forward to look over their daughter. She placed a gentle kiss to the baby’s forehead and murmured a prayer to her, the only word of which Kaz understood being the newborn’s name.

He fell asleep with his partners carefully tucked around him and his daughter steadily breathing in her sleep. They had wanted that for so long and they finally, finally had it.

[ms-fade]

how about jealous kaz brekker with breeding kink???

Eyes on me, all eyes on you.

Kaz brekker x fem!reader. +18 Drabble

The last sentence is cringy, but my mind went blank at that moment. This is also really short, I’m writing this tired and about to head to sleep.

Warnings: talks of pregnancy, breeding, jealousy, oc kaz, not my best work.

Kaz was always the jealous type, either it be before he was not ready to touch you. And how others could do it without a thought, the way you would hug or touch someone. Then there was who you smiled at, you threw everyone that damn smile and it made him sick to his stomach. And then when he had gotten passed his demons with your help, he faced them head on. Kaz was now not afraid to touch you, fuck you, love you the way he had always wanted. Now he had you in his claws, only for him to cherish.

You where his diamond, his shiny gem in the ruff. Ketterdam didn’t have many good things but you were the most beautiful thing in this damn place. And he should have known when he gifted you that drees you would wear it out, oh he should have burned the damn thing before you had the chance.

How your waist looked, so easy to wrap his arms around. How your breast looked in it, the cut low and the corset made your breast pop. He watched as every man in the place looked at you like meat on a stick, how their eyes wondered and how their minds couldn’t help but picture you naked. And that angered him to the ends of the damn earth, because no one should think of what’s his.

“Don’t take your fucking eyes on me.” He demanded as you tried so hard not to close your eyes. “Did you enjoy all that attention you got tonight. All those eyes on you?” You whimpered out to tell him no.

“No- I don’t.” You managed to say but it was just sobs coming out your mouth as his cock enter your pussy at a fast speed. “Oh, no? The dress you had on tonight said different. Everyman in there wanted to see underneath.” He leaned down to bite your lower lip and pulled on it. “I was going to kill them all, take their eyes for daring to look at you.” He roared the truth.

All you could do was look at him with frowned brows as you moaned. “Next time you decide to show more skin, I’m fucking you in front of them all. To show that only I can get the slut out of you, make your pussy leak for me.” He smirked at your expression, he knew how much you loved it when he called you names.

“I’m sorry. Only yours” you reached up and wrapped your hands on his shoulders. “My body is yours.” He laughed, “I already knew that.” He leaned back up and rammed into you, his hands pushing your legs back to open you up more.

“Maybe if your belly was swollen they wouldn’t look.” Your head went fuzzy at what he was implying. “I’m going to stuff you so full tonight, over, and over again until you can’t take anymore.” He reached one of his hands to touch your stomach and pushed down on the right spot.

“Get you pregnant with my child, my cock will give you what you need. You’d like that wouldn’t you?” He asked like it he was teasing you. He knew you couldn’t say no to that, him claiming you more then he had already. To have his baby inside you.

“Yes, saints, please kaz.” You screamed. “I love you.” Smiling up at him sweetly but it broke often because he never stop thrusting. “I love you too, darling.” He groaned and you looked at the sweat on his skin that made him shiny and look sexy.

“Now let me fuck a baby into you.”

[kaylasficrecs]

kaz brekker recs

his star | imagine, flangst | @alpurrtwhizkersss

somnum | one shot, flangst | @futurecorps3

when am i gonna lose you? | one shot, flangst | @crowsmybeloveds

touch | one shot, smut | @skiller0dani

everything | one shot, flangst | @theowritesstuff

buoy | imagine, fluff | @yelenasbraid

call me what you like | imagine, fluff | @sophierequests

touch | imagine, fluff | @thebadgerclan

pocketwatch | imagine, fluff | @writing-havoc

baby steps | two shot, fluff | @heathsbitch

your love could start a war | two shot, flangst | @heathsbitch

dust and rubble | one shot, flangst | @writing-havoc

grateful you're mine | imagine, fluff | @sophierequests

take my hand and don't let go | imagine, flangst | @sophierequests

honeycakes and sweetened words | one shot, fluff | @sophierequests

that sick bastard | one shot, flangst | @pregnant-piggy

underestimated | one shot, flangst | @jahayla-parker

nightmare | imagine, flangst | @bookishdream

healing hands | imagine, flangst | @talesofesther

a hot drink and a softer side than usual | imagine, fluff | @bey0nd-1he-stars

shattered paintings | one shot, fluff (bit of angst) | @writing-havoc

kiss it better | imagine, soft fluff | @jakescakeislateforourdate

sweetheart | imagine, fluff | @bloodwrittenballad

i'm getting used to you | two shot, fluff | @grimbanes (this is part 2 bc it's my favorite)

graphology | imagine, fluff | @syllvane

will you marry me | imagine, fluff | @goldengoddess

the lovers | imagine, fluff | @syllvane

heal his heart | one shot, flangst | @webslinger-holland

he just sounds like that | one shot, flangst, comfort | @amsgrey

we have past to bury | imagine, flangst | @the-sound-of-her-wings

someone could lose a heart tonight | one shot, flangst | @sophierequests

forgotten | two shot, angst | @ashessonfire

bad kind of butterflies | imagine, flangst | @midnight-rain-fics

without you on my mind | imagine, soft flangst | @genyakosstyk

three taps | one shot, flangst, comfort | @happyyyandcrazyyy

being in a relationship with kaz brekker | headcanon, fluff | @cammys-imagines24

deathly fever | one shot, flangst | @webslinger-holland

take it slow | one shot, soft fluff | @amsgrey

blood on your lies | imagine, flangst, comfort | @genyakosstyk

willow | two shot, fluffy flangst | @midnight-rain-fics (this is part 2!)

lavender haze | series | @auroravictorium

summer went away, still the yearning stays | imagine, flangst | @reputationgf

anger | imagine, fluff | @reve-writes

apple tree | imagine, fluff | @undiscovered-horizon

ease your mind | imagine, fluff | @lady-ashfade

the set-up | imagine, fluff | @reve-writes

over it all | one shot, flangst | @jahayla-parker

his anchor | imagine, flangst | @zepp-l1n

it's done | imagine, smut | @legends-of-apex

weakness | drabble, fluff | @messers-moony

[yesimwriting]

⋆｡°✩ yesimwriting's masterlist⋆｡°✩

Below the cut is a full list of all my work :) (updated 10-10-23)

*pls limit interactions if you’re a pro ED/ana acc :)*

SCREAM 1996

Final Girl 

Chapter 1

Chapter 2 

Chapter 3

Chapter 4 

Chapter 5

Chapter 6 

Chapter 7

Chapter 8

Chapter 9 

Chapter 10

To be continued.

Final Girl fic-verse:

First Impressions 

Sick Day

———————

Final Girl fic-verse blurbs:

Drunk Y/N 

Stu saying the L word

Billy saying the L word

Little Rituals  

Time of Need

Talking about Y/N

Stu’s thoughts about Y/N and POV

Gingerbread

Billy Loomis x S/O with Panic attacks 

Stu waiting for Y/N and Casual Intimacy

 Billy and Stu with S/O who cries a lot 

Billy and Stu Scaring Guys Away

People noticing their friendship 

Driving with Stu 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

SCREAM VI 

Ethan Landry 

One of Them

Ask about Ethan 

Noticing they like Y/N

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

LAST OF US 

Joel Miller

First Rule

What Follows

Y/N gets hit on - Protective Joel 

Purpose 

Pulling Away

Pulling Away similar story

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

STAR WARS 

Anakin 

More Than This 

Promise

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

AMERICAN HORROR STORY 

Tate Langdon 

Modern day fic

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

DC TITANS 

Jason Todd

Resurgence 

Slow Nights

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

ELVIS THE MOVIE

Business Practical

Chapter 1

Chapter 2 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

STRANGER THINGS 

Steve Harrington

Movie Club

Chapter 1

Chapter 2

Times Have Changed

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

DAREDEVIL

48 Hours

Chapter 1

A Red Widow

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

SPIDER-MAN 

This Time it’s Different 

Chapter 1

Chapter 2

TASM Peter 

Domestic Assertiveness 

Hobbie Brown 

Ask about Hobbie

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

YOU

Bloodroot in the Suburbs 

Prologue

Chapter 1: The Babysitter 

Chapter 2: Kill Habits, Not people 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

SIX OF CROWS SERIES:

Searing Starlight

Searing Starlight Chapter 1

Searing Starlight Chapter 2

Searing Starlight Chapter 3

To be continued.

—————-

Kaz Brekker:

Blurb series: The Promise of Rain (i define a blurb series' as a series with shorter chapters where each chapter correlates but can technically be read as a stand alone)

The Promise of Rain (blurb 1).

The Promise of Rain (blurb 2).

The Promise of Rain (blurb 3)

To be continued.

—————

Falling Angels:

Falling Angels Chapter 1

Falling Angels Chapter 2

To be continued.

———

Anastasia (Prologue) 

Bookworm reader 

A Knife in the Back

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

SHADOW AND BONE:

The Darkling:

Solace (part 1)

Solace (part 2).

———————

To Be Alone (smut).

Solutions

All the Good Dreams (might be getting a part 2)

—————

The Needs of Pain (part 1)_

The Needs of Pain (part 2, smut).

—————-

Corridor Moments

darkling x shy! reader HC

Comforting the darkling HC

Playing Vices

Darkling x anxious! Reader

Kirigan x Soft Girls/Similar personality 

Crossing Lines 

Darkling x Pregnant! Reader 

Possessive/Breeding 

Nikolai Lantsov:

Tranquility.

Handmaid reader x nikolai. childhood best friends to 

lovers fic

Enemies to lovers Nikolai HC (i'm thinking of making a series based on this

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

SHADOW AND BONE X SIX OF CROWS:

The Problem With Light Chapter One

To be continued.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

RED QUEEN:

Maven Calore:

Dying Starlight

[writtenmarauder]

Home (Kaz Brekker x Fem!Reader)

Summary: Kaz and Y/n enjoy their normal life with their kids and found family.

Warnings: None? Perhaps a warning for being pregnant?

Requested: yes: kaz and y/n have kids (taking place years and years later) and we just get family fluff with the crows being amazing uncles and aunts

Masterlists: Master of Masterlists/ Grishaverse Masterlist.

It was early summer and the first warm nights had rolled in which meant little to no sleep for the former ghost of Ketterdam. After a lot of tossing and turning, she sighed and sat up. The little one in her belly started kicking. She smiled and rubbed her hand over her belly.

“I know little one. I feel you.” She whispered.

Her eyes fell on the empty spot in the bed. It wasn’t unusual for Kaz to be up in the middle of the night, but tonight she missed her husband. Slowly she got up from the bed, throwing on one of his shirts. The house was very quiet, not a floorboard or plank moving due to the heat. Y/N krept through the hallway to Kaz’ office. The light was out. She sighed not feeling particularly keen on entering an empty room. She placed her hand against the nearest lightbulb. It hadn’t been on for a while, but it had been on tonight.  

“Kaz?” No response. Y/n made her way down to the living area, but no sign of her husband there either, “Who knew my grumpy husband would be hard to find.”

She walked back up the stairs, wondering where he could be. The last step groaned under her weight. Suddenly soft giggles were heard. The twins, of course. Her lips curled upwards as she approached the room.

“Ssssshhht, Mommy is coming. Hurry!” “Quickly pretend you’re asleep.”

Y/n was waiting in front of the door, trying to contain her laughter. She cracked open the door and saw the twins in their beds, giggles still ensuing. Kaz was laying on the couch passed out. She shook her head and walked in.

“You two should be asleep.” “Sorry, mommy.” Jess smiled. “We couldn’t sleep and Daddy was reading us a story. Then he fell asleep before us.” Jordie smiled. “Really?” “Yes mommy. Look he fell asleep!”  “Shhhht, I can see that baby. He must’ve really wanted to stay.” “Will you stay too?” Jordie asked putting on his best puppy eyes.

When Jess joined him, her heart melted. How could she say no to the 4 year old twins who conquered her heart the moment she led eyes on them. She remembered Kaz needing a little push from Nina to hold them. He had never looked happier holding the warm bundles of joy in his arms.

“Alright I’ll stay, but you’ll have to move over.”

The two were more than happy to follow out this order. They both chose a side to lean up against. It was very cramp, but the trio made it work.

“We also listened to Unca Jesper and put a tiara on daddy. He’s a pretty princess now!” Jordie chuckled. “How about I invite over your aunts and uncles tomorrow?” Y/n chuckled. “Really?” “Do I ever lie to you?” “All the time!” Jess responded. “I do not. Saints you two.” She smiled and tickled them.

Their laughter filled the air as they were enjoying the attention. The baby kicked again. She stopped tickling and tried to sooth the baby by rubbing her belly. Jordie jumped up a little when the unborn baby moved again. It was a perfect outline of a foot.

“Mommy mommy look it’s baby sibling.” he beamed touching her belly. “Indeed. They are turning. Getting ready to meet you two.” “Woah that feels so weird!!” Jordie beamed. “Inside voice, my darling. So we don’t wake daddy. He’s probably very tired.” “Like this.” he whispered. “You’re doing incredible.”

The three of them stayed cuddled up till the sun crept through the curtains. Besides short naps the three didn’t get much sleep. Jordie let out a big sigh and held on to his stuffy.

“Mommy, can we make breakfast for Daddy?” He asked, with Jess immediately backing up this plan.  “Of course we can, let’s put our best sneaking shoes on okay?”

They made their way down the stairs as stealthily as possible. Before they could get started she sent the Dreg, that came by with information, to gather the crows for a little party. He would be rewarded generously for his endeavours.

”What compensation are we talking here?” “100 kruge now and 50 more when you bring them here. Do we have a deal?” “Consider it done, Ma’am.” “Thank you so much.” “You have a good day Ma’am.” “You too.”

Jordie and Jess were waiting impatiently for her to start breakfast.

“Alright. Now that your Aunts and Uncles are on their way. What do we want for breakfast?” “Waffles!!!” They cheered. “Of course. Let me guess neither one of you knows how to make it, do you?”

They shook their head and she let out a sigh. Next thing to do was to find the waffle recipe. She flipped through the cookbook Nina gave Kaz, when she was bedridden. Waffles had to be in here.

“We’ll have to ask, Auntie.” “I can make waffles.” Y/n exclaimed. “Yes, but they might be different than auntie’s waffles and we love those.” “Saints, Nina, what did you start?” “Nothing. Except I make them realize that waffles are the best thing ever and the solution to all your problems.” “Auntie Nina!” The twins shouted and ambushed her with hugs. “Fear not, my loves. I will help with the waffles, but I will need some help, Jess will you help me?” “Yes!!” She cheered.

Jordie kept standing by the door and when Y/n tried to pull him back to the kitchen, he spoke up.

“Auntie, where is unca Matts?” “Oh, he is being a sleepyhead. I think he’s a bear who sleeps through summer.” “Bears sleep through winter!” Jordie laughed. “Very good, little one.” Kaz smiled, leaning against the doorframe. “DADDY!!” The twins shouted and ran up to him. “Careful, my leg is hurting from sleeping on the couch.”

He knelt to the ground and hugged them tight.

“Thank you for staying with us daddy.” “Anytime. I promise to finish the rest of the story tonight. Okay?” “Thank you Daddy!” Jess cheered The door swung open revealing the most envied couple of Ketterdam. “Saints, don’t you look precious, Boss!” Jesper laughed. “What on earth are you talking about?” Kaz looked at his reflexion and saw the tiara, “Who did it? I’m not mad, I just want to know.” “I did it.” Jess smiled proudly. “Oh really? How about I tickle you!”

Jess ran away, laughter filling every corner of their small house. Kaz tried catching up with her and eventually laid down on the ground dramatically conceding the chase. The twins ran to his side and pretended to be healers.

“I feel much better, thank you. Now help an old man up.” Kaz joked. “Oh god, please don’t say you’re old I’m older than you.” Jesper groaned. “I guess that makes you ancient.” Wylan joked. “Wylan, so glad you could make it!.” Y/N smiled. “Hi, how are you?” “Tired, but good. Can’t wait to let this one out of here.” “I can imagine. What like 3 more weeks.” “Yeah, something like that.”

Nina poked her head out of the kitchen, like she was trying to sense something. Y/n felt the room spinning and closed her eyes in an attempt to refocus her body.

“Jesper help Y/n to the couch, now.” Nina commanded.

Jesper spun around just in time to catch his friend. He tried getting a response, but besides a faint one nothing coherent came out. Wylan and Jesper helped her lay down. Kaz sat down and laid her head on his lap. His fingers stroking through her hair. A tense feeling building in his chest. 

“No worries people. Waffles are here to save the day once more.” Nina smiled bringing out a stack of warm pancakes.

She had never been more popular. Jesper handed Kaz a plate with two waffles on them.

“Thank you.” He uttered and helped his wife nibble on the waffle.

Nina quickly came by to check in on her friend.

“Low sugar?” Kaz asked concerned. “Just like last time. So don’t you dare worry. She’s in wonderful hands.” “Please don’t be twins like last time, though.” Inej smiled. “Inej, you made it.” Kaz smiled. “I wouldn’t miss seeing my favourite troublemakers for the world and a little birdie told me there was a party.” “You’re right in time.” Nina smiled brightly pulling her best friend along to the kitchen to gossip and make more waffles.

Everyone was enjoying the waffles Nina made. Some like Wylan and Kaz were taking it slow like they were trying to savour every little moment. Whilst others like Jesper and the twins inhaled it like it was water on a scorching day. Jordie made his way over to Wylan like he was on a mission.

“Unca Wy?” “Yes?” “Will you play something for us, please?” “Of course, Jordie. It would be an honour. to play for you.” “Yaaaay!” “Unca Jesper, will you dance with me?” “But of course! How could I not?”

Kaz smiled at his found family and felt at ease. Y/n sat up and snuggled into his side as she too enjoyed the music Wylan was now playing. Kaz held her protectively.

“You’re still wearing the tiara.” She smiled. “All is as it should be.” Kaz said. “You’re going soft?” “I went soft the day you finally kissed me.” “Finally? You sir were the one calling the shots remember?” “I do remember. You were my personal saint.” “Oh god that was so cheesy.”

The duo laughed and turned back to the group. They were all dancing or making music. Jordie was sitting in Jespers neck to be the tallest dancer and Inej was dancing with Jess. They were happier than ever.

“You know, Kaz, how I used to dream of finding a home?” “It was your biggest dream.” “I found it.” “Home.” Kaz smiled.

Jess wiggled her way to freedom and tried pulling Kaz along.

“Dance with me, daddy!” “Only if you’ll dance with me.”

Jess cheered and the party was a grande succes. It wasn’t provoked with wealth it wasn’t corrupted by rivalry. It was home.

[iliveiloveiwrite]

8k Celebration Sleepover!

Thank you all so much for all the followers! Despite my absence, the attention to my works has been constant and I cannot tell you how grateful I am for every like, comment and reblog. I adore you all.

25/5 — 28/5

- ✨ - love letters - send me the name of a character from the below list, I’ll write a letter from their perspective.

-🔮 - headcanons - send me the name of a character as well as a trope, I’ll create a headcanon.

- 💎 - ask me anything! - send me a question, I’ll answer as honestly as I can!

- ⭐️- shuffle - send me this emoji, I’ll shuffle my playlist and give you the first 5 songs that come up.

- ⚡️ - rant - anything on your mind? Rant to me! Drop your worries in my inbox to get them off your mind.

Character List:

Bridgerton - Anthony, Benedict, Colin, Simon

Shadow and Bone - General Kirigan, Nikolai Lantsov, Matthias Helvar, Kaz Brekker

Stranger Things - Steve, Jonathan, Eddie, Nancy, Robin

Peaky Blinders - Tommy, John, Michael

ACOTAR - Cassian, Azriel

Harry Potter - Draco, Harry, Hermione, Luna, Ron, Neville, Oliver Wood, Fred, George, Sirius, Remus.

Taglist; @heloisedaphnebrightmore @jackys-stuff-blog @velvetcloxds @pregnant-piggy @whovianwholikesgirls @booksndraspberryjam

[martinakl13]

SoC duology books should have some kind of warning (instead of the stupid Netflix stickers), something like "read at your own risk while pregnant" because you could end up giving birth to a baby with Kaz Brekker's hairstyle, coffee brown eyes, and cold expression, who hates sleeping and punches or bites you every time you don't give him what he wants. I know what I'm talking about. By the way, I love the hair and the eyes, but the rest...

[bippiti]

Hi! I know that is hard to figure but can we have a kaz brekker x pregnant reader? Maybe she is a healer who helped him in get used to touch people again ( not like a normal person but enough to convince)?

i love this! im split between these 2 directions so lmk which one you guys like better

As Kaz and the pregnant reader continue to work together, he begins to open up to her about his past traumas and struggles with physical touch. The reader, who is a kind and empathetic healer, helps him work through his issues and find ways to cope with his anxieties.

Over time, Kaz begins to realize that he's developed feelings for the reader. He admires her strength and her unwavering dedication to her patients. As they continue to spend time together, their relationship deepens and they become inseparable.

As the reader's pregnancy progresses, Kaz becomes more protective of her and their unborn child. He goes out of his way to make sure that she's comfortable and that she has everything she needs. Despite the dangers that they face in their line of work, Kaz and the reader remain committed to each other and to their growing family.

or

As Kaz and the reader's relationship progresses, they begin to dream about the future they want for their family. Kaz, who has always been focused on his work and his goals, starts to open up to the idea of settling down and starting a family.

The reader, on the other hand, is excited to become a mother and can't wait to meet their child. She continues to work as a healer, but Kaz insists that she take it easy and not overexert herself. He wants to make sure that she and their child are safe and healthy.

As they prepare for the birth of their child, Kaz and the reader reflect on how far they've come. They've both been through so much, but they've managed to find each other and build a life together. They feel grateful for the love and support they've found in each other, and they can't wait to see what the future holds.

In the end, Kaz and the reader welcome their child into the world with open arms. They feel more in love than ever before, and they know that they'll be able to face whatever challenges come their way as a family.

Thanks for giving me the opportunity to continue this story! As the baby grows, Kaz and the reader work together to balance their responsibilities as parents with their work as healers. They take turns caring for the baby and supporting each other through the long nights and difficult days.

Despite the challenges they face, their love only grows stronger. They continue to cherish each other and their family, finding joy in the simple moments of everyday life.

Years pass and their child grows up, becoming a healer like their mother and a skilled fighter like their father. Kaz and the reader look back on their journey with pride and gratitude, knowing that they've built a life full of love, healing, and adventure.

In the end, they know that they're lucky to have found each other and to have created a family together. They feel grateful for every moment they've shared and every challenge they've overcome. And they look forward to many more years of love, growth, and adventure together.

[linearao3]

17, 21, 29 for the ask game please? 👀

17. What’s something you’ve learned about while doing research for a fic?

For Hearts Starve I learned about the Merther Rising! Also the operations of Welsh coal pits, as per a few instructive website from Welsh universities. Did you know that prior to the earliest child-labor laws, it was common to send children around six into the mines to crawl along airshafts only they could fit through? Then they raised the working age to ten, and they started operating the air vents with cords. Which seems like something they should have thought of earlier.

21. Have you ever deleted an entire scene after spending hours laboring over it? If so, why?

Not usually an entire scene, because the most common reason I cut things is that it becomes clear that the scene won’t move into the next one the way I want it to. But I get pretty far and it’s frustrating. (I do also sometimes delete scenes from the outline, but that’s different.)

29. Share a bit from a fic you’ll never post OR from a scene that was cut from an already posted fic. (If you don’t have either, just share a random fic idea you have that you don’t plan on getting to.)

Okay so you may not believe this but Child Ballad was actually supposed to have this whole other bit of plot, where Inej stays away from Kaz while she's pregnant because he's pissed her off.

“He worries, is all,” Specht says. “Only natural, isn’t it?”

Inej opens a lantern and touches the letter to the flame. She stands before Specht in silence, letting it burn down and down in her hand until she drops a burning cinder on the deck and stubbs it out with her boot.

“Brekker gets no more letters from you.”

He looks at her face, and his goes carefully blank. “Aye, Captain.”

To Kaz she writes one line.

If you think I would lie to you about this, then you can see for yourself how the baby and I do. On the day I choose to come back.

[sissytobitch10seconds]

Tapping, Pacing, Waiting

Fandom: Grishaverse: Six of Crows and Shadow and Bone Summary: They're breaking into one of the most technologically advanced places in the world, it's going to take time. And food, Matthias reminds himself. Warnings: Mentions of criminal acts, hacking, and mentions of grooming/child abuse Word Count: 3,913 Ship(s): Matthias Helvar/Nina Zenik/Kaz Brekker/Inej Ghafa/Wylan Van Eck/Jesper Fahey

Archive link!

A/N: Okay, so I'm a certified Information Technology professional with a CompTIA Security+ certification, but no experience (yet). I wrote this a little after finishing up my internship because I thought that it would be super fun to explore what the Crows would look like as an accurate depiction of hackers. I didn't do any of the movie tropes and tried to find jobs that would fit them while also fitting with our modern technology. I know that this fic is extremely self indulgent, but I just couldn't help myself! I hope you all enjoy, lol. Stay sissy and bitchy everyone <3

As a child, Matthias Helvar’s home had always been quiet.

He had been raised in a cabin in the back of the woods, separated but not completely cut off from the town. He had no television or computers, no technology other than the single corded phone that hung from the wall outside of his kitchen and the radio that his parents used to get their news on Sunday evenings. The greatest amount of sound in his house had been when Trassel or Mila was getting a bath, and even then it only lasted for about half an hour before it died down. The loudest that he remembered his childhood home being was when he had lost them all, when his entire home had gone up in flames.

The boarding school that his distant aunt had sent him to after he had been placed in her custody was quiet as well. The other boys would make noise when they were in the common room, but Matthias got easily overwhelmed by them and spent most of his time sequestered off in the library instead. He had gotten used the noise slowly over time, but the formative years that he had spent away from his classmates meant that the only person he really connected with was the head of his dormitory. 

Jarl Brum had been a man that kept his home very quiet as well. After Matthias had graduated, he had been asked to move in with Brum and their relationship had progressed from there. It had been inappropriate since the first time that Matthias had been called into his office, but he hadn’t realized it back then. He had been too busy searching for something to quiet the loudness of his mind and the outside world around him. The house had been quiet in a pregnant kind of way, always waiting for the other shoe to drop.

The psych ward where he had met Nina Zenik was quiet but loud. It was quiet because not many of the people were really up to shouting or laughing or joking with each other the way that his peers had been at boarding school. It was loud because many of them cried themselves to sleep, or were talking quietly with therapists, or their thoughts were so loud that it seemed to leak out of them and into the air. Nina had been one of those people, struggling with her addiction to heroine and her battle with anxiety.

The home that they had made together afterwards was not quiet, but Matthias liked it that way. A Nina that was healthy was not quiet by habit and he liked it when she was loud. She would sing, whistle, and (somehow) hum off key when she was working. She would type as loudly as she could when she was working at her computer. She kept the central heating on at all times because she hated being cold, especially when she was putting on the weight she had lost while battling her addiction.

They added to the noise together, which was another thing that Matthias adored. He had met Inej Ghafa, a women that was so quiet that she was silent, at a support group for people that had been sexually abused as children and teenagers. They had gotten on like a house on fire and quickly integrated their friend groups together. While Inej was quiet, the boys that she brought with her were not.

Kaz Brekker was loud in a way that he didn’t seem to realize. His presence was a big, buzzing mess of emotion that made everyone look to him when he walked into a room and pay attention when he had something to say. He cane was loud when it tapped on the ground while he made their way around their home. He also spoke under his breath when he was working and creaked his gloves whenever he wore them. Jesper Fahey was just as loud as Nina was. He sang with her while they baked monstrosities they had found on the internet together in Matthias’ kitchen. He would laugh too loudly and too long at jokes but made everyone smile when he did. He snored when he slept, so loud that it felt like he was testing the structural integrity of their apartment.

They moved in together and Matthias was sure that he would never know another person that liked silence as much as he and Inej did. Then Jesper had gotten a boyfriend, and the balance of the quiet-to-loud ratio was restored in their home. Wylan Van Eck was quiet too, almost too quiet. He moved like he was afraid of noise instead of just not fond of causing it the way that Matthias and Inej were. He jumped at loud, sudden noises and whimpered when one of them talked too loud. He never spoke above a whisper, until they had coaxed him into an outburst that had Kaz muttering and the rest of them cheering.

The noises that plagued his home in the current moment were familiar to him, comforting in a way that he could barely describe. He could hear the AC unit that Nina had mounted in the office to the window blowing through their home despite the fully functioning HVAC that they had. He could hear the sound of paws scrabbling on the hardwood floors as Fergus, Matthias and Jesper’s massive greyhound, chasing after Bisha, Nina’s cat. He could hear the sound of the server whirling away in the basement, in that secret room that Kaz had crafted with Wylan a week after he moved in. His favorite sound, the one that made his heart melt in his chest, was the sound of Inej and Nina talking about their favorite show together in the living room.

He walked into the hallway and scooped up the unfortunate kitten that was being terrorized by an overexcited, confused puppy. “Come, kat,” he hummed as he pecked her on the top of her soft head.

They made their way from the hall to the living room, where Matthias paused to watch the scene in front of him. Nina was spread out over the couch, she was wearing a button down shirt that very obviously belonged to Jesper because the sleeves were rolled at the bottom had been tied so that it actually fit around her torso without giving the appearance of a dress. The spread of her billowy red and purple skirt made her look like she was drowning in the fabric, but it also gave just enough allure of her body to make Matthias hunger for her. 

Next to her, Inej was perched on one of the chairs. She was scrolling on the burner phone that they were using for their most recent job. He knew that it was already in what the others called “Cracked Mode” because of something that Jesper had done when they had all started working together. Matthias struggled to even change the settings on his keyboard, so he didn’t know what they really did to it other than giving themselves more things to change and use. 

He couldn’t hear what they were talking about but he could guess that it was something semi-serious. Nina’s face was mostly hidden by the glare of the big picture window behind her, though he could tell that she was being serious based on the way that she was twisting a strand of her hair around her finger over and over again.

Bisha was very discontent that they had stopped when she could see her favorite person. She turned towards Matthias and gave an angry mewl before she sunk her tiny, sharp teeth into the flesh of his hand. He gave a grunt of pain before he said, “Alright, message recieved.”

“It’s my favorite baby!” Nina squeeled when she saw what he was doing. She sat up and then took the cat from him with the practiced elegance that only she seemed to be able to put into everything that she did. He knew that was how she snuck into offices she didn’t belong in and talked her way into being invited to galas on the regular.

“I brought her to you, saved her from the bullies,” Matthias explained. He finished crossing over the floor of the living room and then set the cat down on Nina’s stomach. That was exactly what Bisha had wanted, melting into the loafed position while purring loud enough to put the servers to shame. He then turned to Inej and gave her a kiss on the side of her head, something intimate enough to let her know that he loved her without risking triggering her if she was really in her mind.

He wasn’t offended or upset when he didn’t get a response from her. He didn’t even feel hurt when she jerked the phone away from him so taht all he was able to see was a black and blue screen with a number of different graphs over it. He knew that she was working on something and they would tell him about it in language that he wouldn’t really understand when they were finished. 

Matthias’ internal clock was letting him know that he had to return to the kitchen soon, and he didn’t want to interrupt their work any more than he already had, so he got ready to go. “Hey love,” Inej called for him as soon as he had made it to the doorway.

“Yes?” he asked, turning back to her.

“When did you say that the day off for the Ice Court was, again?” she asked.

It was hard for him to think back to that time in his life. He had only recently opened up to the rest of his partners about the things that he had suffered at the hands of the Chief Security Officer of that company. He knew that he was the entire reason that they had chosen to go after them, Kaz never did anything just for fun. He had information that would help them get deeper into the company without having to send Nina after specific people just yet. He wanted to keep her safe and make sure that she was in as little danger as possible, but it was so hard to bring up those memories.

“The standard day off is Sunday, so that the CEO can spend the whole day in church,” he explained. “It is possible that they have changed it or they have a rotating schedule though, but that is when traffic is going to be the least busy. Many of the employees and all of the upper levels are very religious.”

Inej reached out, leaning over the chair in a way that made it look like she was going to topple down into the floor. Matthias knew that she wouldn’t, he had never seen Inej fall, but it still sent a burst of worried adrenaline through his body to see her like that. She hooked her hand underneath his big fingers and then pulled his knuckles to her lips. “It’s going to be okay, I promise,” she whispered.

“I know,” he nodded. “If you have more questions, I’m going to be finishing dinner in the kitchen.”

“Dinner?” Nina squawked as she jerked on the couch. Bisha let out a discontented mew and moved so that she could dig her claws into her owner’s flesh more effectively. Nina gave out a little pained noise and squirmed away, but eventually settled so that she was holding her cat against her body with her arms while sitting up.

“I’m cooking something that has to sit for a long time,” he explained. “I know that it is early for us to be eating, but I’m hoping that the carrots will be just right by six.”

Nina let out a little huffy noise and brushed her skirt down so that Inej could sit next to her on the couch. “I’m fine eating our evening meal whenever, but Kaz is so routine oriented.”

“Wylan is too, don’t blame this entirely on my husband,” Inej laughed. 

“I heard my name,” Wylan said as he came in the front door of their apartment. He had another package wrapped in brown paper with about a thousand stamps and addresses on it. Matthias hadn’t even realized that the second quietest of his partners had slipped out of their apartment again, but he supposed that it made sense. Wylan was building another one of their massive PCs after the previous one that been crushed in an accident during theri last mission. They had a series of PO boxes opened under fake names around the city that they ordered the parts through so that no one could tell what was coming to their apartment, but they had to visit them at random times and days to complete the illusion.

“We’re just talking about you being routine oriented, though you’re kind of defeating my point right now,” she said as she gestured to the box in his hand.

“I am routine oriented!” Wylan almost looked offended as he slipped his shoes off to place them into the shoe rack. “Work time is from nine to five, except on the weekends when I can let myself do work in the middle of the night for the servers. Just because I don’t have to go through the same motions at the same time every day doesn’t mean that I’m not worse than Kaz.”

“Mental illness is not a competition,” Matthias reminded him gently. He decided that dinner could wait to be prepared for a little while longer since Jesper prefered his carrots closer to raw than cooked anyway. He walked over and took the package from his boyfriend, leaning down the foot between them so that he could steal a kiss. “What is this?”

“A bunch of GPUs,” Wylan replied with a mad grin. “Come, come, you can help me install them!”

A flash of adrenaline and panic flooded through him as his mouth turned downwards into a frown. “I don’t think that is such a good idea, Wy,” he replied.

The other man was too excited to listen to him properly and so began to lead him through the house by his elbow. Matthias had only just enough time to look back towards his girls, pleading for them to come and save him with his eyes. Nina gave a dramatic wave and then pressed her hand to send him a kiss but did nothing to help him. Inej was already absorbed back in her phone.

They made their way to the hall, where they opened up the linen closet. Wylan slid one of the towels to the side and then pressed his thumb down onto a fingerprint scanner that was hidden behind them. There was a soft pop and then the shelves slipped into their secret compartment so that another door was revealed to them. He threw open the door that led into the hidden lower floors of their house with a dramatic bow and allowed the taller to step through first.

Matthias had always thought that the lengths that Kaz went to so that he could hide the real work that they did was overdramatic, but his boyfriend was nothing if not theatrical. There were two staircases and two downstairs areas. One of them was a partially finished celler where Inej stored all of the preserves and dry goods that she made sure they stocked up on. The other was the room that they were descending into now, well-ventilated floors and walls that were painted a boring color of white and pocked with marks from where screws and other computer bits had ended up in them. There was a main office space where the PCs that Wylan had built were stacked up on the desks that the others used. The room that they were going to was Wylan’s workshop, which was right next to the room that held their massive server rack.

“Welcome home,” Kaz rasped where he was bent over his computer again. Matthias wasn’t able to see anything because of the privacy screen, which combined with the illusion of a dead power button allowed him to fake that he wasn’t doing anything. 

“I’m going to be making roast for dinner,” Matthias said softly as he leaned down so that he was close to Kaz, his face tilted for a perfect kiss position. He knew what the other man’s touch-tolerance had been by the whiteboard that they had upstairs, but Kaz hadn’t touched it since that morning so quite a bit could have changed.

His stomach turned to honey as the other met his lips in a brief kiss and then returned to his work. Matthias stood back up and then crossed through the office so that he could get to his other boyfriend’s workshop. Wylan had a half dozen towers open and their parts strewn about on his magnetic whiteboard and their respective anti-static pad.

The red-haired man was practically bouncing off the walls as he walked to the other side of the table in the center of the room and then tapped on it, “Bring it here!”

Ever the diligent house husband, Matthias did as he was asked. He walked over and then set down the heavy package. As soon as the paper had hit the table, Wylan had his box cutter out and was beginning to slash his way through the packaging without once damaging the parts inside. “What are you going to use these for?” Matthias asked as he watched with rapt attention.

He hadn’t grown up with technology and was particularly inept at it, but he had somehow managed to fall in love with people that were so good at it that they could outrun trained security professionals and it was fascinating to watch them as they worked.

“I’m going to use them for something really cool, I promise,” Wylan replied cryptically.

Matthias was unconvinced. He kept his arms folded as he leaned down on the workbench so that he could continue to watch Wylan no matter where he was in the room, “Does this something ‘really cool’ have anything to do with opening up the GPUs and then selling them online?”

“This time? No,” Wylan replied. “I’m going to be building some very powerful PCs so that we can do more rendering of the Crow that we use when we infect systems with ransomware. Inej said that she needed something better to look at and I can’t draw on nothing,” he explained. 

The box had been properly opened to reveal a set of ten of the objects that Wylan had been talking about. He plucked the first one from the top of the stack and then set it lovingly down next to the anti-static mat that he had been working on earlier that morning. He tucked the rest of them into the special cage that he kept his spare parts in. “Do you want to keep hanging out with me or do you have something to do? I remember you saying something about that when we were upstairs but I can’t recall what it was exactly.”

If Matthias could make sure that Wylan was blushing all the time then he would. The other boy flushed over his cheeks and his ears, all the way down his neck and onto his chest when he was particularly embarassed. Matthias had never seen anything more handsome and adorable in his entire life, especially in the summer when it brought out the freckles dotting the corners of hie eyes. He was clearly embarassed now because he had gotten too excited and hadn’t listened like he had promised to.

Communication had been something that they struggled with not only as a team, but as a polycule. They had promised that they would actually talk to each other instead of just doing things almost a month after they had formed their entire relationship properly. 

“This isn’t something you have to be worried about, love,” Matthias murmured. He walked around the table and then pressed a kiss to his forehead. “I like that you are excited and let myself be bullied into coming down here with you.”

From the other room, Jesper poked his head in. Based on the angle that he was at, he was sitting on the wheeled chair that they had at his desk. He also had a giant beanbag that he used at times and one of the fidget stools when he was having a particularly hard day. “Hi,” he smiled.

“Hi,” Wylan replied, the grin impossibly stretched over his charming features.

“If you need someone to keep you company, I can do that, Wy,” he grinned.

“Have you finished your virus, Jesper?” Kaz’s gruff voice asked from where he was still hunched behind his computer.

“I’ll get to it when I get to it,” he grumbled in reply. “You can’t rush art.”

Their boyfriend grabbed his cane as he pushed himself to his feet. He walked over to them so that Jesper had to tilt to the other side, giving them a good view of the rippling muscles of his back underneath the fabric of his tank top. Kaz reached down and brushed his gloved hands, always gloved when they were working, over his lover’s face. “I can when Nina and Inej have been war driving past the Ice Court for almost a week. They’re going to get caught if you don’t hurry up so that you have the virus ready for deployment when they get this month’s pattern.”

“I hate it when you’re nice to me and talking about work,” Jesper growled as he leaned further into the touch, eager to be loved even if he was complaining.

Kaz let out a small sigh. “If you promise to actually work then you can sit in Wylan’s workshop while he builds the computers we need for the next phase of the job. If I hear kissing for longer than thirty seconds then you’re both going in time out,” he stated.

“Thank you, baby,” Jesper grinned. His lanky arms stretched out for just long enough to wrap around Kaz’s hips while they kissed, giving the disabled man a bit of extra stability while he bent over.

The sound of wheels on the ground echoed through their space, temporarily mixing with the AC unit and the whir of fans cooling off computer parts. Matthias had just barely stepped into the doorway when Jesper appeared there with the laptop he was working with clutched in his hands. “Hey handsome,” he grinned.

“I have to go make dinner, you cannot distract me again,” he replied strictly. He leaned down and gave Jesper another kiss regardless. They swapped places and Matthias headed up towards the kitchen so that he could get his work done. He wasn’t a computer whiz, he barely knew anything about electronics, but he did know things about people. He could feed his partners, his family, and make sure that they did preventative maintenance on themselves as well. Just the thought of their needs made him remind himself to get the rice bag out from the cupboard so that Kaz could use it when he eventually stopped working. 

They were doing something wonderful for him by taking down the company that his abuser still worked for, and he would repay them by loving them and supporting them with every fiber of his being.

[randomfandom-3]

thats time my little sister had to write something about a character trait and how a character proved it

she chose kaz brekker

Her tecaher has read the book

she chose his character trait as ruthless

GUESS WHO DIDNT HAVE TO EXPLAIN WHY

could you imagine that paper though? “I know this because he killed a guy, kidnapped a pregnant woman, and fought and kill a large chunk of his gang, wich is grown men, by the way”

[thatfangirlofsb]

T/W: Grishaverse spoilers.

Your highness (V)

"I've already told you several times Nina, it's not that easy." Kaz's voice was already a little angry, despite his relative pity for the heartrender. Getting someone out of Hellgate was not so easy, especially not that drüskelle who had excelled so much in the little fights with that tourists entertained themselves and spent their money.

"I'll go myself and..."

"And you'll come back in a coffin, or you'll surely end up thrown into the sea first." Jesper's voice, which was never the one of reason, this time decided to be. "I like risk, but I prefer it to be at a card table."

"Inej?" She asked the suli, looking for some support, but she only received a short movement of the head from left to right; no. "Wylan?" The boy who had just come down the stairs looked at her confused, he seemed just awake but he still didn't react much to the sunlight leaking through the cracks. "Nobody?"

"Nina Zenik!" The door was flung with a too-strong blast of air, and the heartrender couldn't do anything but open her mouth in surprise at hearing that voice again.

"Zoya?" She turned her head to see the squaller clearly. She hadn't been so confused ever, her mentor was there. Why had she made such a long journey to Ketterdam? "Zoya!" The last repetition of her name was not out of joy or fear of seeing her there. The cause was that small movement of the cape caused by the air that was still spinning around her, letting her see for a few seconds... It can't be. "Are you pregnant?" Zoya rolled her eyes, just like when Nina did something wrong in the Little Palace. "How...?"

"Am I going to have to explain how babies are made?" Zoya asked in ravkan, her voice clearly annoyed. "Though, I'm sure you already did it with your drüskelle..." Nina couldn't help but blush, still hearing how they named him aroused a strange feeling in her.

The squaller shrugged off her cloak, setting it on a chair and giving Kaz a little disgusted look.

"Kaz Brekker..."

"Zoya Nazyalensky and mini Zoya Nazyalensky." He answered her, his voice as raspy as ever.

"Hopefully, so then I'll have someone else who can torture you with their attitude." She sighed and turned her head, catching Inej with her gaze and offering her a small smile. "Buna, spectru"* She said in suli, catching the small welcoming smile she showed.

"Can we speak in a language we all know, please?" Jesper's voice caused them to turn their heads towards him. "Kerch, for example. Or can I ask you 'cav anyonee?' "

"My donkey is very well, thanks for asking." Zoya looked strangely to the Zemeni boy, and then turned her gaze to the heartrender. "What? I know six languages, it's part of my job."

"You and me, alone." The etherealki said, pointing at Nina, this time in Kerch with her thick Ravkan accent. With each passing second she regretted going there.

"Easy squaller, Nina stays here."

"No." Zoya rolled her eyes at Brekker's arrogance. But instead of answering him sarcastically, she decided to grab a chair and sit on it.

"Yes."

"No."

"Thank you for asking me what I think." Nina spoke loudly, trying to make them listen to her and not pretend she didn't exist... but she couldn't. "I would like to..."

"I've been with this for several months." She said pointing a finger at her swollen belly, and instantly felt a kick. Give them to Kaz Brekker when you get out, not me now. "I have made a very long journey and without the protection of the Second Army." She felt another kick. "I've lost myself. I've almost been kidnapped by the shus and a Ketterdam's merchant. Besides, I have to…" She sighed and counted to three, but she couldn't control herself any longer. "Stop!" They all looked at her in confusion, all except Dirty Hands. He only smiled slightly with a mocking face. "When you all get pregnant and the baby wakes you up kicking you in the middle of the night... don't come to me for advice."

"We aren't saints, we don't perform miracles." Kaz said looking at Wylan and Jesper, before turning his gaze to Zoya, causing her to realize the mistake.

"I don't care." Crossing her arms over her belly, she turned back to Nina. "I went to Fjerda Nina, to Fjerda! I thought that drüskelle had broken out of his jail and brought you to the Ice Court."

"Matthias is still in Hellgate." Now all eyes were on Nina. Finally, she thought helplessly. "And that's what I wanted..."

"He is okay in there." The heartrender looked at her slightly stunned, she always ended up being interrupted. "I need you to take the position of General of the Second Army."

And no noise sounded, only Nina could hear the beating of the hearts of all those present. She even noticed how her own slowed down for a few seconds, after hearing such shocking news.

"Zoya, you're... Wait, if you're here and you've been traveling for several months, that means you're no longer a general." Before the squaller, and now a former general, answered her with a sarcastic surprise, zhe decided to keep talking. "But if Alina has come back and married Nikolai, just like the news says, that means she's a general now."

The long-awaited wedding between the king and the sun summoner had caused a lot of talk, and had also filled the headlines. 'The great golden wedding', 'The saint and the king, a love story with a happy ending', 'Alina Starkov, saint and new queen of Ravka', 'Royal and saint wedding'... And so they had continued writing for weeks, telling their readers about what seemed like a love story of a happy couple, until the Kerch market managed to cause a huge inflation in the price of wheat and the interests of readers changed.

She would have kept thinking about it if weren't because, after hearing the blond's name from Nina's mouth, a kick caused her to touch her belly slightly surprised. Had he recognized his father's name or was it just crazy things that the blue-eyed one imagined? But she wasn't the only one who realized that, the only difference was that he thought of keeping the information to himself until he knew more and could use it.

"Nikolai Lantsov and Alina Starkov?" Wylan's voice, still a bit sleepy, broke through the silence of the ground floor of the Crow Club. "Haven't they been expecting a baby since several months?"

"Yeah." Said Inej, taking out the knife with the name of the half shu summoner and beginning to play with it, passing it from one hand to the other. "A holy baby."

Zoya couldn't help but roll her eyes. A baby could be a saint when she was too.

"Impossible." Improbable. And there it was again, another memory of the stupid king who seemed not to have cared for her at all. How foolish she had been when she thought that the sex between them was something more, that there was something romantic between. It was just an affair and now, for thinking about what Alina told her, she would have to deal with the consequences. "But I don't want to hear their names, thanks to the orphan I'm like this." Nina turned her head slightly to the side, showing her confusion. "You are going to Os Alta, you will take the position and you will say that I died in search of you when we were returning to the Little Palace."

"I'm not leaving without Matthias, and…"

"I don't think our fellow grisha would like to see you hand in hand with someone who would pay to become inferni, burn them all, and then burn himself for being a grisha for a few minutes."

"He does not..."

"Fjerda?" Kaz's voice was present again, and Zoya couldn't help but turn her gaze to the other suli for an explanation. But it seemed that it was going to be impossible, Inej looked at her boss with confusion too. "Have you been to Fjerda?"

"Yes, it was very simple." Zoya summoned to grab another chair and place it in front of her to put her feet up on it. "I just needed to not show my abilities, they are such idiots… they think that a pregnant woman isn't dangerous."

"How far did you go?"

Zoya thought, trying to remember what it had been like to walk through the snow with an already visible belly and a big coat over her to keep out the cold. Ravka was a cube of ice, but the country of the drüskelles was a whole lake.

"Elling." Her memories were so detailed that she grimaced for a few seconds when she noticed that nauseating smell again. It was disgusting. "From there I took different boats to here." Her mind recalled all the materials, animals, and people that were stacked on those ships. That smell seemed similar to the one she had to inhale for several days in the cellar of... "Don't you smell something like goat?" She didn't know how, but she had managed to recognize the exact scent. And it seemed that everyone was just as surprised as she was, because they were looking at her with confusion. "It smells like goat, and don't ask me how I know. My hair suffered a lot."

And as if it were an omen, some hooves were heard against the steps of the staircase and a small goat began to jump lightly until it reached the ground. "

Milo! What have I told you about..."

"Get that wild animal away from me!" Zoya didn't mind hearing Jesper's voice speak fondly to the animal. She stood up on one of the chairs, her hands ready to summon a current of air and push it away. "I didn't come all the way here to die because a wild goat struck me with some type of a rare disease."

"Hands in place, squaller." Kaz spoke again, and Zoya glared at him. Who did he think he was, an otkazat'sya, to speak like that to her, a very powerful grisha and not in a very good mood thanks to her pregnancy and the long journey. "Leave the goat, or there is no heartrender for you."

"Thank you for putting me in play with a goat." A bleat caused Nina to smile slightly. "I'm sorry Milo, but you know I love you."

"You have hurt his feelings." Jesper covered the animal's ears with his hands as he gave the corporalki a disapproving look. "You are no longer invited to his birthday."

"Fjerda, right?" We were talking about Fjerda." Zoya opened her mouth, she didn't want to continue watching and listening to how that place seemed to be full of criminals who were missing a few screws.

"Nina, Matthias will be free in a week." Zoya could see how, with Kaz's words, the grisha's smile brightened again. Was she so crazy that she was glad for the early release of a murderer who would make her his first target? "Squaller..."

"No."

[°°°]

"No." Zoya raised her hands in the air a little higher, holding the fjerdan up against the wall of his dungeon. "Do you want me to take the air out of him?" She asked as she watched Nina touch her neck, where marks from the drüskelle's grip were already beginning to form.

"We need him alive, squaller." Kaz didn't seem to know how little she cared what he thought, but he still seemed very sure with his words. "Aren't you, fjerdans, polite? We've come to get you out of here and that's how you welcome us?"

"I prefer..." The blonde drüskelle couldn't speak, feeling how his throat was getting smaller and he didn't get enough air to form sentences.

"Squaller." Brekker warned her.

"Drüsje..." Matthias said using a very little amount of air, pointing his fierce gaze at the girl who had accused him of being a slaver and the one who was making him float.

"And now you find out?" Zoya said, with a funny tone and couldn't help but laugh. "Was it shortness of breath or floating?"

"Drüsje..."

"Your friend isn't much of a talker?" asked to Nina. Zoya laughed again, squeezing a little more to see the pained face that drüskelle was trying to hide. This is for all my comrades you killed on a pyre.

"Squaller." The grisha no longer cared about what Kaz told her, it was her moment of revenge and she was going to take advantage of it. "We don't want your baby's father to have to leave his royal duties to attend the birth with you in a cell."

Her powers disappeared, and the blonde fell; not high enough to hurt himself, although a slight groan of pain was heard. Nina ran towards him, and Zoya couldn't help but show her disgusted face. How could she care about a monster like him?

"Don't you dare..." The grisha didn't expect him to know, it was a secret she planned to take with her to the grave. But here he was, unleashing it in the middle of the mission to get that fjerdan out of the Hellgate, then get Nina to Os Alta so she could disappear off the map. "Don't you..."

"Don't be so open and touch your belly when you hear his name and don't say you don't want to hear about the king and queen of Ravka. Although the rumors about your relationship in bed helped." She was going to kill Brekker right there, if that thief from The Barrel knew that information…she and her baby wouldn't be safe there; and nowhere. "Will you give me the honor of explaining or am I going to have to say my guesses?" The boy looked down at the place where the result of her little adventure with the king was, and she wrapped her arms around it as if she could protect him with that movement. "Do you know why you have lived through so many kidnapping attempts? Now you are more important than just a grisha. Now a banner of a million kruge reward hangs over your head for finding the missing general on a mission, or at least her dead body. ." A small smile appeared on Kaz's face, and the other Crows noticed that this was how he looked at the wads of cash. "Imagine how the price will go up when he finds out you're carrying his baby."

"Don't you dare..."

"You don't know how many tailored corpses to look like you your dear king has seen." Zoya felt all eyes on her, now she was a great reward for those ruffians; alive or dead. "But I'll help you. I'll take you to live your love story and I'll get the money in exchange."

"It's not..." They were the only two who spoke, all the others were silent by choice; except for Matthias, who had passed out after Nina had slowed his heart rate.

"But it will be difficult, but you will take care of that." Zoya felt a draft around her, something very bad was coming and she could discover it through the challenging look of the boy in front of her. "A certain Sabina Garin has taken her daughter, alive, and now that girl is being general to your dear king."

"If they've already found me then why are you talking about a reward?" She avoided showing how her face contracted. She wished, the day she ran away with her aunt from that church, to never hear that name again in her life. But there she was, listening as her past, the one she had tried so hard to leave behind, came back to her.

"Zoya, we both know your mother would never act with good intentions. Not when your search began two weeks ago." The squaller was very confused, how did he know who her mother was? Though later, when she remembered who he was talking to, she forgot those questions; he was Kaz Brekker, what he didn't know didn't exist. "Or are you going to let her kiss the lips of your dear king?"

"You can take care of the king, leave Sabine Garin for me."

—————

* I couldn't find how to say 'hello' or 'wraith' in suli, so I translated those two words into the actual language closest to the grishaverse; the romanian.

You can read the first part HERE.

You can read the second part HERE.

You can read the third part HERE.

You can read the fourth part HERE.

[sophierequests]

first of all, congratulations!!!!! i love your stories and it's only fair that a lot of people love them too! you're doing great <3

and now, please, cym with the grishaverse

🍃 pretty little things

cym as grishaverse characters

thank you so so much, love <333

i was waiting for someone to do the cym with the grishaverse!!!

kaz brekker: @brekkers-desigirl @b3kk3r-by-br3kk3r

jesper fahey: @writingmysanity @maliciousbrekker

inej ghafa: @ell0ra-br3kk3r @grimbanes

nina zenik: @juneberrie

matthias helvar: @freddycarterswife @hufflesight

wylan van eck: @spaceagebachelormann

nikolai lantsov: @futurecorps3 @jahayla-parker @the-lonewriter

zoya nazyalensky: @yesshewrites1

genya safin: @maximoffgxrl @pregnant-piggy

david kostyk: @zaypay @nyxxxxxxxx

tamar kir-bataar: @factionlessrebel

tolya yul-bataar: @dellabearry @rowritesstuff

harshaw: @velvetarcane

→ to my event post!

[brooklynsloverboy]

Recs

Carmy Berzatto

- Loverboy

- Virgin!Carmy

Tommy Shelby

- A ride home

- Sentiment

- Rapture

- Sunshine

- All Yours

- The Book Thief

- Headcannons

- Bar Counter

- An Ode to Ruination

- A night with a Shelby

- Pen Pals

- Wedding Night

- On your knees

Miguel O’hara

- Different positions

- Pregnant

- Boyfriend!Miguel

- Office

- Morning Wood

- Honey Sweet

- Artist

- Thigh

- Apotheosis

- Beauty Behind the Madness

- Brothers Best Friend

- First Time

Loki Laufeyson

- Shower me with love

- Bewitched

- Filthy Little Books

James Potter

- Pussy

Six of Crows

- Little Crow

Eddie Munson

- Needy

- One last time

- Halloween Party

- Eddie headcannons

Kaz Brekker

- Betrayed

- So Good

- Touch

- All Around Me

- Movement

Steve Harrington

- Thighs & Tits

- Migraines

- Want you to stay

- Flirty

- All I want, you’re all I want

Joel Miller

- Sucking balls

- Cockwarming

Killian Jones

- Sex w/Killian

Namor

- Take me into your arms, Siren's call

Pedro Pascal

- Cherry Cola

Bjorn Ironside

- Bjorn Ironside falling first

- Happy Birthday, Bear

- Christian Girl

- Sofite

- I've always loved you

- Servant Girl

Obi Wan

- Ootman (Chapter 6)

- Obi Wan Thots

Roman Reign

- iii Suit & Tie

Oberyn Martell

- Body Worship & Dirty Talk

[georgies-ftts]

i love the fact that my two main book series that i’m into have complete opposite main characters and yet i absolutely love both them

Percy Jackson: Will jump in-front of very sharp and dangerous weapons to ensure his friends safety, will turn down immortality and god status, throw himself into literal hell for his girlfriend, gone on like 27 quests, fought and lead two major wars and countless battles for the gods and is about to go on another quest despite all of this just so Zeus will give him a recommendation letter for uni, has buried countless friends and family, been betrayed by said friends and had to kill some of them for his own protection, went on a quest to save his mother from the god of the underworld despite being 12 years old, had never held a sword until 4 hours ago and will 8/10 perish, nearly dived off a cliff after his crush, offered to stay in hell just so his girlfriend can escape, and was complicit in the ‘murder’ of his abusive step father, using medusas head to turn him into stone and then sell the statue for a lot of money and using said money to better their lives and repair the mental damage he caused

Kaz Brekker: will dangle you over the side of a building for information and then drop you, burn a hole in your ceiling and crash into your dining room table with your disgraced runaway son, threaten to arson your innocent girlfriends house, beat up 20 or so members of the gang he is also in, use you as insurance, use you as a hostage, use you as a distraction, have your sole part in the plan to be get beat the fuck up and leak the rest of the plan, fake your assassination and keep you so close to death and simply hope you’ll wake up but it doesn’t matter if you don’t, tell you he’s buried your son alive in a field in the middle of nowhere to traumatise you but he hasn’t, ask you if your mother is a whore and then knock you the fuck out, never tell anyone else the plan which will result either in you being seriously wounded, kidnapped or dead, use your father to get other people to embezzle funds into an auction for the guy you’re gonna assassinate, kidnap your pregnant wife and hold her to ransom, rip your eye out, threaten to rip out the other one, say he’ll drop you off in the next town if you give him the information he wants but when you give him said information he throws you into the sea to either drown or die of infection but it’s okay because he’s “the kind of bastard they only raise in the barrel”

[cantstoptheimagines]

First i love it how organised you are and i would like to ask if could write a kaz brekker x fem!reader where she is the sister of jesper, kaz and her have a secert realtionship but the reader gets pregnant and they have to tell it the crows

I hope thats ok, thank you for time and sorry for my english

first of all, tysm for telling me about the organization of my blog! i'm glad to know it's easy to navigate! second, your english is amazing!!! don't ever doubt yourself!! 💗 third—

thank you for the request, it's been added to my list! i might change the pregnancy part just a little bit since kaz has touch aversion, but i'll try to keep it as close to your ask as possible! it's a really cute idea and i think, despite his circumstances, kaz would make a good father 💗💗

your request number is 63. you can check on its progress here!