#probably won’t arrive until after christmas

[chaos-husband]

Guess who remembered he has vectors to make from who knows how long ago while his laptop is busy exploding!?! ME!!!!11!1!!!aa!

[gretagerwigsmuse]

rocketman: part i - it's just my job five days a week

Summary: in which lieutenant commander bradshaw is on a three month special detachment in the pacific and the holidays have never felt lonelier for either of you. it's just three months, it'll be fine, right?

OR you and bradley write each other 159 emails

Pairing: Rooster x Fem!Reader 11.8k

Warnings: 18+, explicit language, suggestive dialogue, bradley needs to remember this is a government email server...(okay yes, i am perfectly aware that our esteemed lieutenant commander would probably get kicked out of the navy for some of these emails…that being said, i also don’t particularly care! we’re playing fast and loose with the time stamps too because i may be smart, but math has never been a strong suit of mine!) enjoy the companion playlist! rest of the series can be found here!

12/17 @ 6:19am

I miss you already and I haven’t even left the parking lot. I’m still in my car typing this after having stayed for probably far too long watching your C-40 take off (like people were staring at me I was there so long)(and, yes, I looked up the name of the plane). Pete asked me if I wanted to get breakfast with him, but I said no. Felt too lost. Plus, I need to get ready for work. We’re going to get dinner on Wednesday before I head up to Berkeley Thursday morning, though!

Hope you have a safe transport and settle onboard quickly. I left you something in your duffle bag (yes, it’s safe to open around other people…head out of the gutter, Bradshaw).

Love you and stay safe, x

12/18 @ 5:46pm 

Just dropped off the gifts at the Junior League for Caroline’s adopt a child thing. She was completely in her element (they gave her a clipboard and a bullhorn!), though she did say we went wayyy too over the top. But little Carter asked for all that stuff! We couldn’t just not get it all for him? She also appreciated your wrapping skills, very impressed with the bows and tight corners. I met a couple of her friends there, which was nice and they invited me to stay for drinks (the prosecco was flowing…), but I wanted to head home. 

I miss you so much already, it feels weird not going over to your place after work and making dinner and prepping lunch together - and it’s only been two days. I know you’re on a comms blackout for the next couple days, so I’m just gonna keep sending these so you’ll have a bunch to read all at once.

All my love, x

12/19 @ 11:48am

My brother and Lauren decided to come out here for Christmas after all! My dad was so excited when he called me, but I think Mary’s a little less enthused. Feels like shit knowing we were the backup option for them. Apparently, Lauren’s mom is sick and the whole house is in disarray (not hard in that family…) so my dad is paying for them to fly in from New York tomorrow. I think it’ll be nice, we’ll almost have a full set (baring you, of course, my darling rocketman), so the house won’t be as lonely. Do you think we’ll get to talk on Christmas or Christmas Eve? You should be getting a package soon (‘twas preemptively sent!) and are under strict orders not to open it until Christmas Eve, buddy!

Going to dinner with Pete tonight, I’ll let you know how it goes. Amelia’s coming with us, but I don’t know about Penny? I hope they like the gifts we got them. I’m going to stop by your place, do a once over, and make sure the tree is ready for Pete to take, etc. before I leave on Thursday.

Love you and talk soon! x

12/20 @ 7:03am

House looked good! In my seat on the plane. If my morals were shakier, I would 1000% have taken Max up on his offer to fly me up to Berkeley. But alas! Climate change is real and private jets account for 20x as many carbon emissions as commercial planes, so I am up at the ass-crack of dawn for this 7:15am flight. I’ll message you when I land, love you!

12/20 @ 9:04am

Just landed - easy flight. Now to find my dad in arrivals…

Love you, talk when you get the chance! x

12/23 @ 4:45am

Hey sweetheart! Back online and all settled in. I’m bunking with Payback and we actually have a pretty decent layout. He graciously offered to give me the bottom bunk, due to my ‘geriatric status.’ Honestly, I’m just glad I don’t have to sleep in the bunk room with the ensigns and rest of the crew. I forgot how noisy it is being on an aircraft carrier, which makes Payback’s snoring surprisingly pleasant. I’m glad he and Bob are with me. The rest of this squadron’s from Lemoore and Bob knows some of them. It’s interesting seeing him and Payback fly together, but they mesh really well.

Glad Mav is there to keep an eye on you. 

Okay, I had way too much fun picking out all those presents, so I really hope Carter loves them too. And please tell me you have a picture of Caroline yelling into the bullhorn? I can truly think of nothing scarier than Caroline Calloway ordering the young women of San Diego county around like Santa’s chief elf. And speaking of gifts, I loved my pictures. The one from the Christmas party is my favorite, did Fanboy take it? I saw him running around with his Pentax. When the hell did you have time to print it? I’ve got it hanging up in my bunk so I can see it every night. 

I still don’t understand why you don’t fly into Oakland instead of SFO? Like I get it, you’re not a Spirit or SW girl, but kid….it’s an hour and forty minute flight? Live a little. And I think it’ll be nice having your brother and Lauren around for Christmas. How many people do you think it’ll be? I always loved seeing Christmas Eves with large families in movies and stuff, all the chaos and whatnot? But it’s just gonna be you five Christmas Day? I’ve heard rumblings that I might be first in line for a Facetime on Christmas Eve, so save some time for me too, kid. I’ll let you know for sure in a couple days. 

Okay, think we’re all caught up now. Talk soon and love you so much,

Your Bradley

12/23 @ 9:08am

Bubs! I read your email four times since I woke up, I can’t stop smiling. I’m glad you’re all settled in - Payback’s snoring and ageism aside haha. How’s the food? Do you want earplugs? A sleep mask? Are earplugs allowed for sleeping? What if you need to get up right away and you can’t hear? I could send you a white noise machine? Or is there a fear of hacking with that? I should’ve done more research on this before you left. Tell me if you need anything, I’ll send it out express! Oh, I’m just so happy to hear from you. Keep me posted!

Lots of love, x

12/23 @ 8:53pm

You and me, hot date tomorrow night at 11:45pst - don’t be late. (And look cute.)

Your Bradley

12/23 @ 8:55pm

I’ll be there 😉 Love you, x

12/25 @ 9:56am

Bradley Bradshaw you absolute sneak! How on Earth did you pull a Christmas miracle off!?! Mary said she had no clue, so I’m extremely impressed you got my dad to keep that secret!? I was totally not expecting another present from you? The cooking lessons and apron were more than enough - to say nothing about moving in together!?! I love the bracelet so much, you have no idea. I started crying when I opened it! Mary took a video, which I’m sure she’ll send you. God, Bradley? You didn’t have to do that! It’s perfect, it’s like we’re locked together. I’m gonna wear it everyday. Please email me later if you get the chance! 

(Also, Lauren looked really jealous 😉 my brother was sweating)

Love you and Merry Christmas Rocketman! x

12/25 @ 11:38am

Ummm, not sure what you’re talking about, kid? That sounds like something Santa would do? Probably heard about how good you’ve been this year? x

12/25 @ 11:40am

Thank you, I love it so much and wish I could give you the biggest hug and kiss right now. I’ll have an extra slice of babka for you tonight, talk soon and Merry Christmas, Bradley! Love you x

12/27 @ 4:49am

I miss sleeping next to you. Whenever I can’t sleep, I think about the way you looked at me in the living room after our Christmas party. You looked so happy and I hate that I have to leave you for all our firsts. First Christmas, first New Year’s, first Valentine’s Day. And god, sweetheart, you’re so fucking gorgeous it makes me want to lose my mind sometimes. Always thinking about you, Bradley 

12/27 @ 8:38am

I miss sleeping next to you, too (especially since your body is like a furnace and you hold me close when I get cold). And I know you being away during the holidays is hard, but look at it this way - we’ll just have our firsts next year. Next year will be our first Christmas, first New Year’s, first Valentine’s Day together, not an ocean apart. We have all the time in the world, rocketman. Love you today and every day x

12/29 @ 6:02pm

There’s already so many things I’m dying to tell you and stories about the squadron we’re teaming up with, but the Navy will have my ass if I give away too many details so I’m just going to leave it at this: are we sure Max doesn’t have a twin on another continent? Take that as you will. What’re your plans for New Year’s? Your Bradley

12/30 @ 9:20am

Sorry for the delayed response! A minor issue with my brother and my dad that I won’t bore you with had the whole house in a tizzy. Thankfully, he and Lauren are gone even though my dad still won’t tell me what the issue was? Anyway! God, I wish I could hear more about Max’s twin? I am honestly kind of scared about knowing there’s a Max doppelgänger in the Navy (jokes!). For New Year’s, I’m going to this party with Mary and dad in the city, it’s at this fancy venue and I have a cute black dress! It’s very different for me and I wish you were here to see it! I’ll have to wear it again. Message me when it’s the New Year your time! Love you! x

01/01 @ 12:09am

Happy New Year, sweetheart! They had a little party for the officers - we even got cake and Bob snuck me and Payback seconds somehow. It’s always the quiet ones you gotta look out for. You absolutely need to send me pictures of you in that dress, I can’t wait to see it on you in person someday. Hope you have a great time with your dad and Mary, give them my best. Love you and again Happy New Year! 

Your Bradley

01/01 @ 12:01am

Happy New Year, Bradley!!! You got cake!! You broke some rules! I approve! Milk them for all the cake they’re worth! I’ll send some pics of the three of us and one just for you big boy 😉 Talk soon and love you so so much! x

01/01 @ 10:59am

Had a late start! Here are the pics from last night! Try and sneak some more cake xx

[mary_and_dad_being_annoying.jpg]

[me.jpg]

01/02 @ 6:12am

You know you labeled the pictures wrong…luckily no one was behind me…

01/02 @ 9:04am

Who? Me? I would NEVER! (Just trying to keep you on your toes.) Hope the flying is going well and you’re staying safe, B! Love you!

01/03 @ 8:00pm

Yeah, it’s going well. It’s so different flying on the open ocean after so long? Last time was in September when I went to Hong Kong. The desert is cool, don’t get me wrong, but seeing the clouds and the water together is unreal. The pink and purple clouds remind me of you (sorry, that was lame). You still gotta let me take you up, kid. I’ve heard Mav is trying to convince you, but you gotta let me be the one. Can’t trust just anyone with my girl. Love B

01/04 @ 10:13am

Bradley…he’s practically your father, I’m pretty sure you can trust him to take me up in a plane, you silly boy. Not that I’m saying you won’t be my first…but come on! And it’s not lame. I like that the pink and purple clouds remind you of me. Every time I see a plane I send a little call out for your safety. Gotta keep you safe, rocketman! Talk soon and love you! x

01/06 @ 4:45pm

My parents just dropped me off at the airport and no matter how many times I leave them, I always cry. I think the only time I didn’t cry when I left their house was when you were with me over Thanksgiving. You always make it better, bubs.

They’re coming down in a couple weeks to help me start packing, anything in the house you wouldn’t want them to see while dropping off boxes? I can still bring my old bed, etc for the guest room, right?

All my love, x

01/06 @ 9:58pm

I think I get that, having you around this time makes it different. I’ve never had anyone to really write to while I’ve been away before. Sure, I talked to my grandparents when they were still around and my aunts and uncles, Nat, Ice, and a couple others, but not like this. And I don’t ever want to not feel like this again. 

I’m an open book, kid. Ain’t got nothing to hide. And yeah, anything like that feel free to bring with you for the guest room or office. It was the bed, nightstands, and dresser and then your couch for the office, yeah? We can get new bedding and pillows for it if you want? I’m on comms blackout for a couple days, so message me whenever you want so I can read them all when we’re back online.

Your Bradley

01/06 @ 10:07pm

Perfect! Love you and stay safe, rocketman.

01/06 @ 10:09pm

Love you too, kid.

01/09 @ 6:11pm

Bradley, I don’t mean to alarm you, but there was a raccoon in your garage! Scratch that, a FAMILY of raccoons!??! I’m sure Mr Harrington was ready to call the cops when he heard my scream. They’re so cute, but also terrifying at the same time? So, I called Pete and he came right over, a true knight in shining armor! Amelia and I did a THOROUGH sweep of the house to make sure they were relegated to the garage. Pete got them out safe and sound with a random tennis racket and your 4 iron, but somebody’s coming tomorrow to check on how they got in there. And I know they aren’t hurting anyone, but I just don’t want there to be any issues later on? (The babies were actually so cute and reminded me of my cat growing up, Porter.) Anyway! Enough drama for tonight, I hope that gets a laugh out of you - talk soon!

Love you! x

01/10 @ 8:05am

Well, the exterminator got here around 7:30 and sprayed all this stuff and blocked the hole in the crawl space of the garage. He showed me pictures and let me tell you, there was quite the nest up there. These raccoons were living large over the holidays. 

01/12 @ 5:21pm

Okay! I’m in the parking lot, waiting for my first cooking class to start. Is it weird I’m a little nervous? I hope everyone else’s skill level is similar, I don’t like feeling behind. I brought my new apron, ironed it and everything. I feel a little like Ina Garten, isn’t she just divine? Okay, okay, I’m going in now! I’ll let you know how it goes! Thanks again for getting me these xx

01/12 @ 7:03pm

I feel so tired? Like my hand cramped a little bit? We started off the class with knife skills, which we’re going to do every week and then made this “simple” egg dish, which was NOT simple and I overcooked the egg. Ina would be so disappointed. Alas! Onto next week. Love you!

01/15 @ 9:12pm

Bradley you’re not going to BELIEVE what just happened on Succession. My heart is POUNDING? Do you think if I called and asked really nicely the Navy would get an HBO subscription for everyone? That is what I would like my tax dollars to go towards. Can you get me a direct line to someone in charge please? Love you!

01/16 @ 7:47am

Not to worry my little Barefoot Contessa, I have returned back to civilization (ie the internet), though am dismayed to have missed this mind blowing Succession episode? Has Perry Mason started back up again or will we be able to watch that together? 

Bob and I were in the gym earlier and he almost dropped a dumbbell on my foot, I swear my life flashed before my eyes. But I had a new PR on the bench press today, up to 285 pounds. Glad the cooking lesson went well though! What’s the class makeup like? x Bradley 

01/16 @ 9:04am

I’m glad you’re back online and safe! Perry Mason has not started yet, though I’m still certain you’re the only person under the age of 55 that watches it (I guess I should say we’re the only people under the age of 55 that watch it, but whatever). You’ve also missed a couple Top Chef episodes, but we can always binge this season later. 

There’s about 12 of us in the class and it’s pretty evenly split? Though there’s tragically this really annoying couple who were at the station next to me. I hope we get to change next week, I don’t think I can watch them feed each other food another week. 

And I’m still waiting for that direct line to the Navy, Bradshaw! Love you! x

01/1 6 @ 6:59pm

Wait, wait, how did I miss there? There was a WHAT in my garage? A raccoon? Multiple raccoons? We need to get a dog or a cat or something. x Bradley 

01/18 @ 7:02am

Bradley!! I know we talked about a trip once you got home (provided you still feel up for it with the transition and all), what if we went here? I was talking about our tentative plans with my dad and Mary before I went back to San Diego and they went to Punta Mita this past fall and LOVED it! What do you think? Love you!

01/18 @ 6:03pm

Holy shit! That looks absolutely amazing, yes I’d love to go! Can we afford that though? It looks expensive? xBradley

01/18 @ 6:05pm

YAY!! Ahh, I’m so excited you have no idea! I want to hug and kiss you so bad right now! We can fly for free since I have a bunch of AA points (thank you pwc) and then I have like a million Amex points, so it’s not full price!! 

01/18 @ 6:12pm

When you say ‘like a million’ do you actually mean a million or?

01/18 @ 6:14pm

Yes! I’ve had this card for like 15 years! My whole family does the pooling on it! It’s a drop in the bucket, promise! Plus, I always use my other card for work and that has a whole bunch of Bonvoy points on it, too. We could stay at one of those? I think there’s a St Regis next door?

01/18 @ 6:22pm

Sweetheart, I want to go, I just don’t want you to waste all those points on this. 

01/18 @ 6:26pm

What if we go for 6 nights instead of 9? Maybe no plunge pool? Or we could pay cash instead? And then I could get 6x the points from paying that way? So, really….the points just keep accumulating, we’ve got to use them sometime! The points can pay for the flights and the hotel and then we can split the room charges and incidentals 50:50?

Will you think about it? You don’t have to give me an answer right away and we can always pick another hotel? But if we want to go someplace in late March/early April, I think we should book soon with spring break and all? Not that I imagine many coeds will be staying at the Four Seasons, but you never know…

01/18 @ 6:33pm

You gotta send me a ppt on all this points stuff, you know math stresses me out. And no, I don’t think many coeds will be staying at the Four Seasons, kid. 

01/18 @ 6:37pm

Can I send you a dossier with everything!?! Even if you say no to that I’m doing it anyway ;) just promise me you’ll think about it, please? I’ll do whatever you want, Bradley <3

01/18 @ 6:40pm

Yes, please send the dossier my way henceforth, Moneypenny. 

And you’ll do whatever I want, huh? Might have to send you a dossier of my own now…

(But yes, I promise I’ll seriously consider everything. I just don’t want you to feel like you have to spend all this money to make me happy. I’d say we’d both be happy camping out on the beach, but I think that might be a security issue down there, plus neither of us like camping - anyway, you know what I mean.)

01/18 @ 6:43pm

Lieutenant Commander Bradshaw!! Is this a dossier for my eyes only? What will M say!? I’ll send you mine if you send me yours?

(But seriously, thank you! I’ll send you more specifics tomorrow - like pricing and whatnot - and you can take a couple days to think it over. And thank you for clarifying the camping thing, I was worried for a second there.)

I love you so much rocketman and we’ll talk (email) tomorrow 

x Moneypenny 

01/18 @ 6:46pm

I’d say ‘sleep tight,’ but that’s a given considering you haven’t been fucked in a couple weeks. 

(Perfect, I genuinely am really excited about it, just want to make sure it works out for us both.)

Love you so much, kid 

Your Bradley

01/18 @ 6:58pm

Bradley Bradshaw!! You did not just say that over a government email server! 

Imissyourcocksobadlyit’sdrivingmeinsane

01/18 @ 7:01pm

Couldn’t help it. Plus, we both know it’s true. 

01/18 @ 7:04pm

Oh, shut up. Shut me up

01/18 @ 11:43pm

I’m sorry if I came off too strong about planning earlier, I might’ve gotten a little carried away and been a little too eager about planning something five days after you’re home from a three month detachment. If at any time before you come home or even right after you come home you don’t feel up to the trip, please please please tell me. I want to do something nice for you and give you a chance to truly relax, but I’d hate for it to come at a price. So, just let me know, okay? Say the word and we’ll push it, alright? I don’t exactly know what you’re going through, but tell me if it’s ever too much. I’ll always be here, promise. Love you x

[dossier_for_your_eyes_only.ppt]

01/19 @ 8:29am

Kid, no. I promise I’ll tell you. You know I love how excited you get planning things. I think I like it so much because you take care of it all. Sure, you ask for my opinion and what I want, but I just have to tell you one thing, one idea and you take care of it. 

Funny though, isn’t it? How it’s totally opposite in the other side of our relationship? You tell me one thing, one idea and I take care of all of it? Bet it’s hard for you not having someone around to do that for you? Maybe next time we Facetime we can talk more about that? x B

01/19 @ 10:11am

Luckily, I have a very creative imagination, Lieutenant Commander Bradshaw. 

See right now, I’m in my office, sitting at my desk, feeling so overwhelmed. It almost hurts how overwhelmed and frustrated I am. And you bust down the door, hair windswept like you’d flown to Del Mar, and you have that slutty flight suit on and I don’t even mind that you’re sweaty and gross. You smell absolutely divine and I rake my hands through your hair as you eat me out underneath my glass desk. I get a conference call, but you don’t stop the entire time. You like how squirmy and fussy I get, I can’t focus on the deliverable I’m working on for the client. You like that I can’t control myself, that I squeeze my thighs around your head. Eventually, you can’t take it anymore, your cock is aching so badly, and you need to fuck me on top of my desk. You’re so strong it almost breaks. You fuck me so good everyone in the office can hear me crying out for you. 

(actually, I’m on the couch, watching college football, but it’s more fun to imagine you fucking me in my office - see, creative imagination! Make sure you get a quiet room for that Facetime...)

Love x

01/19 @ 7:29pm

You think you’re funny, huh? You have any more of those thoughts, feel free to send them my way. ‘m taking out that picture you gave me for Christmas right now. How you taking care of yourself? My imagination isn’t as creative as yours. B

01/19 @ 7:40pm

Guess you’ll have to wait for our next Facetime…

x

01/20 @ 4:24pm

Your dad and Mary write me emails, you know. They aren’t as good correspondents as you are (for how could they possibly be, my dear?), but they check in about once a week or so. Mary sends me some of the articles she gives her students and talks about the show she’s watching with your dad. Your dad mainly talks about you. It makes me wish my parents were still around to do this stuff with me. Just checking in and writing emails and bragging about me to my girlfriend? How was yesterday’s class?

Your Bradley

01/20 @ 5:39m

I didn’t know they wrote you that often and I’m beyond embarrassed that my dad talks about me that much? But come on, Bradley…you have someone who does that, too? He’s about 5’8” (on a good day), looks great in a leather jacket, and just spent about two hours last weekend cleaning your gutters and telling me about how you won your high school’s debate scholarship?? Like how could you not tell me that? It’s literally one of the hottest things I’ve heard about you!

Class was good! They taught us a trick to cut onions without crying and one of the other girls complimented my apron! We’re doing meats next week, cutting, marinating, cooking, etc. and I’m excited!

01/20 @ 5:42pm

Oh gee, I bet it’s just awful for you to have Mav around all the time. Knight in shining armor…

01/20 @ 5:48pm

He’s not a bother! And it’s not all the time! We’re actually going to get lunch together on Saturday! It’s this new place on the water.

01/20 @ 5:50pm

Sounds like a cute little date! You’ll have to tell me how he is. Love you so much B

01/20 @ 5:55pm

I’ll keep ya posted, bubs! Love you!

01/22 @ 10:01am

Breaking news, kid. Your esteemed, naval aviator boyfriend is going to be on 60 Minutes at the end of February. Totally came out of left field, but I couldn’t say anything until they finished filming. It’s about the Navy in the Pacific and “the lost art of shipbuilding.” They even rigged up a camera on my plane and everything, it was so cool. I’ve been dying to tell you, but again couldn’t say anything until it was official. I probably won’t be on it long since they interviewed the Admiral and Pac Fleet Commander for most of it, but yeah, Payback and Bob and I will be on with my girl Norah. I made sure I had enough sunscreen on so I was camera ready at all times. Love you B

01/22 @ 10:09am

YOU’RE FUCKING SHITTING ME????? Oh my god, Bradley! That’s amazing! Margie even ran into my office to see what made me shriek! I am TOTALLY having a viewing party! Oh my god, how do you think it went? Did they get your good side? What about hair and makeup? I know you get helmet hair, bubs. 

Seriously, so so excited and proud of you, Bradley! I’m going to make my dad and Mary come down for it! She doesn’t teach on Mondays, so this is perfect for them to stay over Sunday night! But now don’t go letting all that fame get to your head, Lieutenant Commander Bradshaw 😉 Love you so much x

01/24 @ 12:17pm

Rocketman - 

I was sitting at my desk earlier and listening to some music before my 12:30 meeting and Elton John’s Rocket Man popped up on my shuffle. Obviously, as you are my rocketman, I always think of you whenever I hear it, but today the lyrics really scratched that special part of my brain, so I did a deep dive into the song’s origins. 

Please note, I’m including this time in my billable hours to the client (re. you). My findings are as follows:

Bernie Taupin was inspired by a Ray Bradbury story written in 1951 titled ‘The Rocket Man’ - not drugs as the urban legend states! Drugs! Imagine!

Bradbury’s ‘The Rocket Man’ was first published in Maclean’s, a weekly Canadian magazine, before it was published in the short story collection ‘The Illustrated Man’ that same year

‘The Illustrated Man’ later was made into a film, though ‘The Rocket Man’ story was notably absent

Some of more popular and renowned stories from the collection include ‘The Veldt’ and ‘The Long Rain,’ the latter of which is commonly read in high school honors English

Was client in honors English? Please confirm in follow up correspondence

Client has mentioned extensive library resources at disposal - perhaps he can check this collection out on his next visit? But for now, an executive summary has been provided:

With space travel more commonplace in society, Doug’s father, an astronaut, is sent on frequent, three- month journeys into space

Despite missing his dad, Doug also longs to be a Rocket Man, though his mother frequently prevails on Doug to beg his father to stay on Earth and be with the family

“What’s it like, out in space?” Mother shot me a frightened glance. It was too late. Dad stood there for a full half minute trying to find an answer, then he shrugged.“It’s the best thing in a lifetime of best things.” Then he caught himself. “Oh, it’s really nothing at all. Routine. You wouldn’t like it.” He looked at me, apprehensively. “But you always go back.” “Habit.”

The father finds that his work is ruining his life, but the draw of the stars is too great: "You don’t know what it is. Every time I’m out there I think, if I ever get back to Earth I’ll stay there; I’ll never go out again. But I got out, and I guess I’ll always go out.”

Even while on vacation with the family, having Thanksgiving dinner, or sitting on the back porch, the father’s eyes are always on the sky…

Doug’s father begs him to not be like him, to not be a rocket man, but what happens when his father goes on one last journey to the stars?

Through much reflection, I have decided that ‘The Rocket Man’ was written about you - and your mom and your dad and me and on and on until there is no longer a need for Rocket Men - or the rocket man simply stops and breaks the cycle

You are both the Rocket Man and the little boy, forever waiting for his father to come home from space

The allure of flying, of being a ‘rocket man,’ is both too great and too sad for you to ignore

None of this is to say the rocket man is selfish, no. He simply cannot resist the temptation. He knows nothing other than the thrill and peace of being amongst the stars

And his mother shielding Doug from the sun at the end is like your mom asking Mav to pull your papers, she does it to save him, but it cannot keep him from becoming his father

Needless to say - I had to postpone my 12:30 meeting until tomorrow as my eyes were far too puffy and any word I tried to say felt like cotton in my mouth.

I miss you and I love you - your ‘Lilly’  

01/24 @ 8:22pm

Fuck - I love you so much. My clever girl.

01/24 @ 8:28pm

I pour my heart out to you and that’s all you have to say, rocketman? ‘Fuck - I love you so much’

(of course, I also love you so much, my clever boy.)

01/24 @ 8:30pm

Darling - it’s going to take me a little longer to come up with any commentary you deem appropriate, so for the sake of time, yes. I gotta read this story in full. I’ll be at the library at my earliest convenience. ‘The client’ will send an annotated copy with his notes henceforth.

01/24 @ 8:32pm

Of course, sweet boy. Goodnight, I love you so much. x

01/25 @ 11:44am

As promised, my darling girl. Love you.

[b.bradshaw_the rocket man_final paper.pdf]

01/25 @ 7:14pm

Oh Bradley! I love you so much, rocketman. Yes, I couldn’t have said it better. Yours x

01/26 @ 10:39am

Bradley! They’re sending me to London in February for two weeks! I even get a swanky corporate apartment for the stay. I wish you could come with me - even if it was just for a long weekend? We could go to all my favorite restaurants and afternoon tea and for walks in all the parks. One day it’ll work out! 

But tragedy of all tragedies! I just realized I’m going to miss a couple cooking lessons when I’m in London! I already emailed the instructor before today’s class and she said there’s other classes throughout the week that are behind us, so I can make it up with them! Ahhh I’m so excited! Talk soon, love you!

01/26 @ 11:13pm

I didn’t realize how nervous I was about the trip until I went to bed tonight. It’ll be my first trip abroad since I got my promotion in November. Plus, it’s a completely different client than my last trip abroad and I’ve only met one person on this new London team before. Sometimes I go into these meetings and still feel like a little kid? I’m always the youngest person in the room and normally the only woman and on one hand, that’s cool? But sometimes I feel like someone’s daughter instead of their colleague? Like these guys are my dad’s age? And they’re actually supposed to listen to what I have to say about their company? Do you ever feel like that? Like you don’t really belong, despite knowing you’ve earned your place? I wish you were beside me right now. My bed feels way too big tonight. Love you.

01/27 @ 7:48am

Sweetheart! I am so unbelievably proud of you! That’s amazing! You gotta celebrate, go out to dinner with Caro and Darcy, maybe even Nat! I know you’ve been working so hard these last couple of weeks, you absolutely deserve this. I can’t say I know exactly what you’re going through, but yes. I have absolutely felt like I haven’t belonged or deserved something despite having ‘checked off all the boxes.’ I felt that way when I got promoted to LC and when I got that award in October. Everytime I see it on my uniform, I feel a bit like a faker? Like do I really deserve this? But then I remember the way you smiled at me when I got back to my seat that night and how proud of me you were and I think maybe I do deserve it? Plus, I also think of how goddamn gorgeous you looked all fucked out later that night. 

And please note, I would happily slip into bed alongside you, especially since my bed feels way too small tonight. Love you, Bradley

01/27 @ 10:56am

Thank you for earlier. I don’t know, sometimes I just feel like I’m just too soft for all of this? Like I’m always trying to prove something to everyone and I get a little lost. Tell me something good? x

01/27 @ 7:01pm

How about this? Every time I go up in the sky and see the way the sun hits the clouds, I think of you. I’ve never wanted to be with someone as much as I want to be with you. I love you so much, kid

Your Bradley 

01/27 @ 7:06pm

Sometimes I can’t believe we love each other this much, it feels like a dream  x

01/27 @ 7:11pm

I can. Your Bradley 

01/30 @ 7:08am

i slept in one of your shirts last night. it doesn’t smell like you anymore, but it feels like you: soft and safe and warm x

01/30 @ 7:23am

Well I spray my pillowcase with your perfume whenever I miss you so I guess we’re even

Your Bradley

ps - can you send me another bottle?

01/30 @ 7:34am

You’re already out? What sort of illicit behavior are you engaging in with that perfume bottle? 

01/30 @ 10:33pm

I burrow my face in my pillow so I can smell it while I fist my cock, why? What’d you have in mind?

01/30 @ 10:37pm

How does that work though? Like genuinely? Do you jack off with Rueben in the top bunk? Or wait till he’s in the gym? I’ve been curious about this for a while now. What about the showers? Is it like an open floor plan thing? Or are there stalls? Is there a Zillow listing for this aircraft carrier?

01/30 @ 10:41pm

Now why would I ruin the mystery? 

01/30 @ 10:43pm

Bradley!!!!

01/30 @ 10:44pm

Atta girl, that’s the spirit! Love you 

02/02 @ 6:30pm

I am so sick of going to the gym. It seems like it’s all Payback and I do lately. We got this new workout regime that’s been killing me - don’t say it’s because I’m old. Though, I have been using my Theragun. Payback does my back if I do his in return. It was only awkward the first time he turned it on too hard and yelped (please tell everyone that). 

02/02 @ 6:46pm

Oh, so you and Rueben Theragun each other, huh? Say more Lieutenant Commander!

02/04 @ 2:45pm

Going to Pete and Penny’s in a bit to watch the Super Bowl! Max is at the game, apparently his golf buddy Jimmy G hooked him up, though he neglected to bring me or Caroline. I feel like you would’ve been his first choice, so take that as a compliment I suppose. Do you guys do anything onboard for it? I have $350 on the 49ers winning by 3. Have a lovely day my darling boy x

02/04 @ 9:30pm

Guess who’s as snug as a bug on a rug in her bed AND $1400 dollars richer? That would be me! When you get home we’re going to Juniper and Ivy, my treat, bubs! x

02/06 @ 4:57am

Awww sweetheart are you gonna sugar mama me again? 

02/06 @ 7:03am

You do know the only reason you’re getting away with that is because there’s an ocean between us, right? 

02/06 @ 6:00pm

Sorry, couldn’t resist! Love you! B

02/06 @ 6:10pm

You’re lucky I love you so much. x

02/08 @ 9:58pm

Can you imagine if I was gone for 20 years?

02/08 @ 10:11pm

Bradley that’s not funny 

02/08 @ 10:13pm

It’s not supposed to be. I’m reading the Odyssey and it got me thinking. 

02/08 @ 10:16pm

Bradley I love you something awful, but you are such an old man sometimes. 

Are you going through some sort of midlife crisis reading the Odyssey while you’re at sea?? Is the Old Man and the Sea next?

(ps i love the thought of you reading in your bunk in your spare time and being so struck by something composed thousands of years ago that you have to email me)

02/08 @ 10:20pm

They wait 20 years to get back to each other - practically half their lives. They miss so many things and barely knew each other before he left, but they’re still so - I don’t even know? They’re just so intent on getting back to the other in Odysseus’s case? While Penelope makes sure there’s something for him to come back to? And I must’ve read this stanza ten times before I had to email you: 

"...the gods cast me upon Ogygia, Calypso's island, home of the dangerous sea nymph with glossy braids, and the goddess took me in in all her kindness, welcomed me warmly, cherished me, even vowed to make me immortal, ageless, all my days - but she never won the heart inside me, never" 

And I know it’s not a perfect comparison or parallel, but I read that last bit and I couldn’t help but think of you? And how you’re the one who won my heart and it’s always going to be that way. Whether I see you in twenty seconds or twenty years.

02/08 @ 10:23pm

You’d come home to me whether it took twenty seconds or twenty years. You’d come home to me and I’d know you anywhere. I love you so much. 

02/08 @ 10:58pm

“Now help me, please, to get back home, and quickly! I miss my family. I have been gone so long it hurts.” 

Your Bradley

02/09 @ 7:03pm

At the airport for London! Taking off! And I may or may not have used points to upgrade to a Club World seat…but like? It’s a nonstop flight, so it’s okay, right? Work’s already paying for business class? It’s points from my work card? It’ll be fine, right?

I had to take an ativan in the lounge. I just hate that I still get so nervous whenever I fly long distance? I fly all the time, I shouldn’t be like this? You know, one time, I pretended you were flying my plane. I know it’s kind of dumb and silly and a completely different type of plane, but it made me feel better because you’d never let anything happen to me. 

Anyway, we’re book buddies!! I went to the bookstore a couple days ago and got a copy! I read the Odyssey back in high school, but forgot so much. I was reading in the lounge and this part made me think of you:

“...this lovely house, my marriage home, so full of wealth and life, which I suppose I will remember even in my dreams.”

I’ll text you when I land my darling boy, love you x

02/10 @ 6:02am

You gotta squeeze every last bit of your per diem out of pwc. You’ve been working way too hard lately. Fuck it, on the way home just put the upgrade on your work card or put it on mine. Have a safe (rest of your) flight - maybe one day you’ll let me take you up. Love Bradley 

02/10 @ 10:08am

Just landed and on my way to the office (already…)

I thought of you as I read and stared out the window on the plane. I could pretend I’m flying towards you, rather than further away. I can’t imagine how you feel doing this everyday, but I imagine it’s like feeling limitless, like everything is in front of you, there for the taking. Maybe, just maybe, I’ll let you take me up one day. 

I’ll keep you posted on how everything’s going if you do the same. All my love x

02/12 @ 5:49am

How’s it going, kid? They working you too hard? You’re in London! Try to enjoy it, you deserve it. One of the guys I’m with gave me a restaurant recommendation for you, said the drinks were amazing, his wife loved it. Do something fun while you’re there! And send me some pictures dammit!

Love you, 

Bradley 

02/12 @ 8:22am

Bradley! It’s been so so crazy here! I feel like I haven’t stopped since I landed. My ‘flat’ is so cute and right by the client’s offices, so it’s an easy commute. I feel so professional taking the Tube places too! It’s one thing I’d like us to have in San Diego as opposed to all the traffic. Also, it’s CHILLY here and I’m so glad I dug my big coat out of storage. I’ll try and check the restaurant out this weekend, I’m gonna sneak in a trip to the Tate, too. I’ve always wanted to see the Turners. Talk soon and love you bunches! x 

02/14 @ 9:54am

Bradley Bradshaw! You absolute SAP! HOW!?! Did you conspire with my dad again? Thank you for the flowers! I’m going to have the biggest smile on my face all day. I love you and hope this is the first of a lifetime of Valentine’s Days together. Always x 

02/14 @ 7:33pm

Happy Valentine’s Day to you too, kid. I’m not gonna lie, I gave your dad very specific instructions for the bouquet (I was going to ask Max, but he’d probably swap it for something ugly and cheap and keep the change…kidding (not)), so I’m glad they turned out well. It was a very big day on board today: we got special red heart cookies for the holiday. The mood was infectious, I can still taste the sprinkles. Maybe you could cook for me on our next Facetime? Have you learned anything good in class lately? It doesn’t have to be fancy, just wanna see you (and maybe also live vicariously through whatever you’re making).  

02/14 @ 7:33pm

Bradley! I think I can swing that for you, when do you think our next call will be? 

02/16 @ 3:18pm

Kid, you spoil me. This package is amazing, I don’t know where to start (just kidding it’s with the Cadbury chocolate and the Sudocrem as my burnt shoulders thank you), but everything is wonderful, thank you. I love hearing about London and seeing the pictures you sent last time. But I do have one complaint…you’re not in any of the pictures, kid, and that’s truly egregious. (Think we won’t be able to Facetime for a while, I gave Payback my slot the other day.)

02/16 @ 3:23pm

That’s not true! I’m in the one in front of the Tate!

02/16 @ 3:25pm

Yeah, but I can’t see you under all those layers! Just want to see your face. It’s been way too long since our last Facetime.

02/16 @ 9:52pm

As requested, Lieutenant Commander. I had one of the girls in the London office take this at dinner tonight. She really did wonders with the lighting and even managed to get my sidecar in the pic! x Love you

02/17 @ 6:55am

You look pretty. New dress? B

02/17 @ 7:17am

Maybe…it was on sale, couldn’t resist. But you’re gonna hate me because all of my clothes are very much not going to fit in your closet. Also, I bought you a new jacket and some socks. x

02/17 @ 7:20am

Ehhh I’m not too worried about the closet thing. But if you keep buying me clothes we might have a problem.

02/17 @ 7:24am

It’s so cute though!! You’re going to look so handsome in it! I got the green one for you!

02/17 @ 7:29am

Okay, admittedly a very nice jacket, thank you. But you are aware that we live in San Diego…

02/17 @ 7:31am

I am aware of that fact, LC Bradshaw. You can wear it when we visit my parents. Hell, I had to get my coat out of my storage closet for this trip. 

02/17 @ 6:53pm

Sighhhhh you raise a good point. Alright, alright, thank you for the jacket and socks my darling girl. What’d you have for dinner last night? We had chicken with these absolutely awful biscuits, tasted like saw dust, my stomach was growling for some more of that Cadbury chocolate (yes, Payback and I ate all of it already, though it was mainly Payback) for hours afterward. 

02/17 @ 6:59pm

Oh my sweet boy! Who do I need to call about your meal plan? Give me the number and I’ll call the Navy up right now. And I had scallops with truffle risotto. It was delicious. Wanted to lick the bowl clean. Love you bubs x

02/19 @ 10:22pm

Bubs, I cannot eat another meal out. I feel like I’m going to burst. I’ve gone to so many work dinners and lunches even before coming here, it almost makes me feel like a glutton. 

I miss you and your cooking (though I’ll have you know that my skills were vastly improving before my trip abroad!) and you standing behind me at the counter while I try to perfectly cut peppers. Sometimes I do it wrong on purpose so you’ll put your arms around me and I can feel the rumble of your voice. Would we call that weaponized incompetence? You better be ready for some Michelin Star meals when you get home, buddy. I just can’t wait to be home with you and roll over next to you in the morning and to tell you to stop snoring and that the battery in the smoke detector needs to be changed. I can’t wait to be home with you and make a life with you. I’m going to be really sappy now, but let me have this because I was reading this poem the other day and thought of you. 

“I am supposed to be touched. I can’t wait to find the person who will come into the kitchen just to smell my neck and get behind me and hug me and breathe me in and make me turn around and make me kiss his face and put my hands in his hair even with my soapy dishwater drips. I am a lovely woman. Who will come into my kitchen and be hungry for me?” (x)

Only a month until you’re home with me, I hope you’re hungry. 

All my love x

02/20 @ 4:50am

It’s only weaponized incompetence if the other person minds. I, however, do not mind. I loved that quote you sent me, going to be thinking about that one for a long time. I hate to tell you this, but I’m gonna be offline for a couple days. I hate that it’s at the end of your trip, but please please message me when you’re leaving/taking off and again when you land, you know I worry. Love you and am so unbelievably proud of you, kid! You killed it in London. Your Bradley

02/20 @ 7:03am

That’s okay, I totally understand. I’ll give you all the details on our next Facetime. In the meantime, I message you when I leave. Stay safe and love you, Bradley! x

02/23 @ 3:45pm

Taking off soon! I got an upgrade again, thankfully! And I made sure to put your new coat in my carry on - I don’t trust British Airways not to lose it! Taking an ativan again so hopefully I’ll sleep the entire flight - love you and talk soon!

02/24 @ 10:33pm

Just landed, slept through….90% of the flight! Apparently, there was bad turbulence, so probably for the best. Now, I know you would never have me deal with that my darling rocketman! Talk later - love you! x

02/25 @ 7:09pm

Feels kind of weird being back? I can’t quite get back into my routine. I’m not sure if it’s jet lag or something else? Feeling a little lost? x

02/26 @ 7:55pm

Bradley!!! You were so good, I’m so so proud of you! Max had everyone over at his place for us to watch you! We have quite the party here including my parents, Pete, Penny and Amelia, Natasha, Mickey and Cielo, Caroline, and Darcy. I’ll have to tell you about the parents meeting later. I wish you had been here for it, they took to each other like bees to honey. 

You looked tragically handsome, I practically had to hold back a moan when you were standing on the flight deck talking to Norah O’Donnell (is she as nice in person as she is on TV?). God, I want to ravish you, you sounded so fucking smart. You know like half the country is going to be in love with you now, right? I’ve got to get back to everyone, Max ordered dinner for us afterwards, but I had to email you as soon as you finished!

Just wanted to let you know how proud of you I am and how much I love you x

02/27 @ 5:09am

Thanks, kid. Sorry it took me a bit to respond, things have been getting a bit crazy, you know, now that I’m a celebrity and all? We’re winding down this training, so the next couple weeks are gonna be full of debriefs and paperwork, which means I should have a more stable schedule. Love you B

02/28 @ 11:48pm

Sometimes I wonder if you were here what would you do? Hold me? Love me? I never feel small except when I’m in your arms. x

02/29 @ 11:48pm

Some nights in bed, if I try really hard, I can imagine I’m laying down next to you. And it makes everything just a little easier. Bradley

03/01 @ 12:56am

I haven’t taken anything besides my fingers in months. You’re going to stretch me out so well when you get home. 

03/01 @ 7:19pm

And I’m gonna mark your ass pink for that comment. I can’t believe you sent that in the middle of the day. You getting yourself off at work? Dirty girl. 

03/01 @ 9:41pm

Never feels as good as when you do it. 

03/01 @ 10:01pm

And my hands pale in comparison to your pretty little cunt. You know that first time we slept together you were so fucking tight, I knew you hadn’t had a good fuck in ages. It gonna be like that again when I come home?

03/01 @ 10:05pm

Where are you going to have me first?

03/01 @ 10:06pm

In our bed, in our house, after you make me dinner in our kitchen. 

03/01 @ 10:09pm

Just over two weeks now, I can’t wait to see you. x

03/03 @ 5:55am

How you holding up, kid? You doing a little better this week work wise? Try and log off around 5 if you can. Don’t want you getting all worn down on me. 

They had us doing these war games yesterday that made me think of you. You would’ve walked circles around some of these other guys I swear. Think I can get a Facetime for us in a couple days? Probably will be our last one before I come home. Love you, B

03/03 @ 7:12am

Bradley! That's the best news I’ve had in ages! I can’t wait to see you! Definitely felt a little lost after coming back from London, but I hope my rut will be over soon? Tying things up with a client is always so lengthy and tedious. 

War games! ‘Would you like to play a game?’ I’d ask if you won, but no one ever wins in the art of war 😉Love you!

03/05 @ 8:54pm

So, here’s a new one. My mom called? She’s going to be stateside and wants to get lunch tomorrow. Could’ve done with a bit more warning, but apparently, she has a layover in San Diego on her way to New York to see my brother? I didn’t even know she was going to see him? I don’t even know if I want to see her? It’s funny, I can already tell you exactly how it’ll play out:

We’ll go to lunch at some sort of vegan restaurant, probably Donna Jean

She’ll make me pay

She’ll try to get me to use some sort of herb to promote weight loss since I’m looking a bit “pudgy” around the face

Though she’ll forget to ask about you, she’ll tell me about her latest string of failed relationships with bartenders and surf instructors in Canggu. Or is it Ubud? I genuinely don’t remember, she started in Ubud, but honestly my knowledge of Balinese geography is rudimentary at best 

She’ll ask how ‘that woman’ is doing as if Mary is just the woman my dad is seeing, not the woman who raised me and my brother

And finally, she’ll ask for money though betting is still open as to what for!

So, what do you say? Wanna put a wager on it? Your terms.

Love you! x

03/06 @ 6:30am

$100 she orders the caesar and makes you pay. I’m not even going to entertain the third parlay, pretty girl. Oddly feeling like she’s got a winner on her hands so yes she’ll talk about her new paramour. Does she really call Mary ‘that woman?’ And yes, without a question, she will ask you for money.

Your move my gorgeous girl,

Bradley

03/06 @ 7:49pm

I really wish you were here right now. She doesn’t even know me, but she somehow always manages to make me feel small. 

Caesar - no croutons 

I paid

Pudgy and frumpy, but she was hawking shakes not herbs

Failed relationship? No, she’s actually GETTING MARRIED

She did not ask about you much other than to say I need to watch my figure for you (see bullet point no. 3)

Mary was called ‘that woman’ six times before I stopped counting

She asked for money as a wedding present 

So, you didn’t get them all, but not a bad showing. Love you. Talk tomorrow on Facetime. x

03/07 @ 6:09am

God kid, I’m so sorry. She doesn’t know what she’s missing. Actually, I don’t even think she deserves to know what she’s missing. Did you talk to your dad or Mary about it? I know we’re talking later, but I just wanted you to have a message from me before you start your day. What’re you wearing to the office tomorrow? Have you worn that polka dot dress with the bow lately? You know it’s one of my favorites and that I always love unwrapping it when you get home from the office. 

Can’t wait to see you tonight. All my love, Bradley

03/07 @ 9:55am

The dress doesn’t fit. My mom was right, I shouldn’t have gotten the french toast.

I’m planning on talking to dad and Mary later today before you and I have our Facetime. I know they’ll make me feel better, much like you have my darling boy, but it still feels pretty crummy. Especially since I’m sure she’s going to have wonderful time in New York with my brother 🙄 and I’ll have to hear all about it next time I talk to him. 

And I’m not sure if I’ve unpacked that dress yet! I’ll have to do some digging. Talk soon! x

03/10 @ 3:26am

We had a little baby. He was always giggling and laughing and we were making silly faces and he looked so small in your arms, Bradley. So small and little and he was ours. And then I turned around and he was toddling around the house and we were chasing him and his little legs were moving so quickly and we all wound up on the couch in a tangle of limbs, giggling under the blankets as we tickled him and he called you daddy. 

It wasn’t our house - or what will be our house, I guess? Instead of the leather couch you have, it was white and big and wide and the three of us could easily fit on it, snuggled together. 

And I could feel your arms around me, rocking me back and forth. I could feel you humming in my ear and kissing my neck and telling me you loved me. I could feel it. I could feel you. I could feel him and you. And it was nice and I felt warm and safe and cherished and loved. Because I felt so much love for this little boy in my arms - the perfect mix of me and you. Everything felt right and perfect. 

Except when I rolled over in bed to tell you about it, I realized I was alone in my bed, in my apartment, and not in the house that we shared or with the little boy that looked so much like you and I haven’t felt so empty and sad since I can’t remember when. 

And I just miss you so much, Bradley. I know I can come across as glib and unfeeling sometimes and like this doesn’t affect me as much. But it does and sometimes I feel like my heart is going to burst because I’ve never felt like this for anyone else before? It’s never been so easy for me to love someone and let them love me to the point that I always want to be beside them. And I know with your job - and mine - that can’t always happen, but god Bradley I wish you were here right now so you could hold me and tell me you loved me because I just want to feel your arms around me and know you’re real. I want to tell you about the little boy - the perfect mix of me and you. 

I love you rocketman x

03/11 @ 12:49pm

I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have said anything. I realize that’s a lot to drop on you, especially since we can’t talk in person. I guess I’ve just never missed a person more in my life and seeing that future showed me what we could have when you come home. God, Bradley I want you to come home so badly. I want you to stay here with me forever and never leave and to have that cute little boy who was the perfect mix of me and you and to have you here in my arms every night. And I know it’s selfish of me to ask or even make you think about it, but I want you right here - in twenty seconds, not twenty years. 

How did your hop go today? x

03/11 @ 7:03pm

I have dreams like that, too. I’ll be little, but still older than I was when my dad died and we’ll be at the beach, running around, and he’ll pick me up and spin me around like I’m flying on an airplane. 

But then it’ll be me and my kid, running around and I’ll pick them up and spin them around like they’re flying on an airplane. Sometimes it’s a girl, sometimes a little boy. But I always just can feel and tell that I love them and I’d do anything for them. 

And I used to hate waking up alone after I had them and I’d feel empty and sad and like I had the feeling that they should still be there? Except now I have you and I know it doesn’t just have to be a dream?

Sorry it took me so long to reply. Today was hectic and I didn’t get to check my email until later. But if I checked it earlier, my day would’ve been a lot easier on my heart. 

All my love,

Your Bradley

03/12 @ 7:11pm

How do you always know exactly what to say? I’m sorry for springing that all on you, know it wasn’t exactly a quick/easy message, but I love that you knew exactly what I meant. My day’s always a lot easier on my heart when I hear from you, too. Love you x

03/13 @ 10:17pm

i miss having you around to take care of me. and telling me what to do and what to wear for you and how you want me and where you want me and when you want me and and and. and how good i feel around you as you come, how you take what’s yours. how i need you to take control and tell me what i need because i’m too much of a dumb slut to figure it out on my own. i need you so much bradley. and it’s so hard because i’m trying to take care of myself like you do and imagine what you’d do if you were with me right now. but i’m so frustrated since no one takes care of me like you do. i feel so empty. nothing stretches me out like you do, nothing makes me feel as small as you do, nothing makes me flush like the sound of your voice against my neck as i come, nothing soothes the ache inside me like you do. need you to call me good girl, pretty girl, sweet girl, anything as long as it’s yours. 

i need you i need you i need you i need you bradley bradley bradley bradley

3/13 @ 10:39pm

Awwww sweetheart, did you get yourself all worked up over me? It’s okay, I know it’s hard for you all by yourself. Must’ve been real bad for you to risk this getting flagged, huh? Poor thing, don’t worry, I’ll take care of you. 

Want you to pretend I’m next to you, leaning over you as you lay down and touch yourself. Say yes Bradley, more Bradley. Bradley, Bradley, Bradley. Good girl. 

Want you naked under the covers, no frilly little pajama set or anything. No, I want your cum to stain the sheets and then for you to have to clean up in the morning, all embarrassed because you did this. You made yourself like this because you can’t control yourself without me around. All that cum being wasted. Nobody around to lick it off your pussy. So what doesn’t get on the sheets, you have to taste. Good girl. 

Want you to use your fingers - only your fingers, I’ll know if you use anything else. Start with your breasts. Think of how perfectly they fit in my hands and how yours aren’t quite the same. They aren’t as big. Aren’t as strong. Play with your nipples, drag your nails across the soft skin on the underside of your breasts.

Want you to sigh my name as you slide your hands down your stomach towards your pretty little pussy. Have you shaved? Gotten a wax? You know how I like it, want it just like that when I get home. Pretend it’s my fingers sliding into your cunt. A few touches and you’re already clenching on air and I’m not even around. 

In and out, in and out. Circle your clit with your thumb. Add another finger, then another. You rocking your hips yet? I know you’re soaked. I know you want more. Three fingers can’t stretch you out nearly as much as you need. But I don’t know if you can handle anything else without me around. And I know you would never disagree with me, right? Because you’re my good girl and good girls do what they’re told. 

Don’t hesitate to get loud. You’re in our house, in our bed, you can be as loud as you want. Bet you’re getting close, huh? Try and last a little longer, can you hear yourself and how wet you are? Are you shaking yet? I know you’re close. Go ahead, speed up your fingers, just the way I do. It’s okay, you can come. Know you’re gonna get sleepy soon, wish I could sleep inside you, nice and tight.

Now say thank you Bradley. Good girl. 

03/14 @ 5:49pm

Thank you, Bradley. Thank you for taking care of me last night 

You like chicken piccata, right?

03/14 @ 7:33pm

Yeah, kid, I like chicken piccata. 

03/14 @ 7:39pm

Okay, that’s good. I’m going to make it when you come home. I ran it by my cooking instructor. Ina’s recipe of course. 

(I’ve read your email seven times since you sent it. I’ve thought about it constantly. I want you to take me softly and slowly that first time. But after that? I can’t wait to let go and float. Love you so much x)

03/15 @ 6:09am

You’re the boss. Good thing I’ll be home soon, you’re gonna run out of material. As is, I had to type that last one with one hand. 

Love you,

B

03/15 @ 7:21am

I’ll be good till you get home, promise. 

Have a good day, do you think we’ll get to talk much from now till Friday? Love you x

03/15 @ 7:24am

I’ll hold you to it. 

I don’t think so, might be able to send one out before leaving the boat. Better make it a good one. 

All my love

Your Bradley 

03/15 @ 7:25am

You got it! Love you bubs 

03/18 @ 11:08pm

Kid - there’s this lyric that keeps running through my head: ‘and I want you right here.’ I want you beside me - today, tomorrow, all my days. I want you right here, beside me forever. In twenty seconds, not twenty years. See you tomorrow.

All my love,

Your Bradley

03/18 @ 11:11pm

See you tomorrow, rocketman. I’ll be the one in blue.

Love you x

a/n: thanks for reading! i'll be back with part ii and part iii (hopefully not in...4 months). i had so much fun writing these and getting to explore a different format and side to their relationship! thanks to alexa @sometimesanalice, kylie @ofstoriesandstardust, cass @notroosterbradshaw, elle @dissonannce, nik @cherrycola27, and loren @heartsofminds for all the support!

[starry-hughes]

carried away

quinn hughes x tkachuk sister!reader

warnings: hints at smut but not actual smut

summary: after years of knowing one another, quinn and you finally find love at your brother’s wedding

navigation

Quinn Hughes was a figure in your life for years. You practically grew up with him. He was teammates with your brother, Brady, who was only a year older than you. Both of your brothers were amazing hockey players and Quinn was as well. You didn’t get to attend school with Brady or Quinn, Brady had moved away to go play with the NTDP team. Matthew had done the same.

With two older brothers in the NHL and being the daughter of a former NHL player, it was easy to say that you had enough hockey boys in your life. But every summer, you find yourself surrounded by them. Your summers were spent at the lake house owned by the Hughes family. Your parents always visited after the school year ended, you and your sister in tow. Sometimes, Taryn opted out due to her having her own plans and friends for the summer.

That’s when you met Quinn. Both of you probably wanted to ignore what awkward and cringey look you two sported at the time. Quinn never looked at you as more than Brady’s younger sister.

As time went along and you grew up, Quinn would see photos of you on social media, maybe you’d be at a game once in a while or at dinner afterwards. But every photo he saw of you, you just got more beautiful. And every dinner he sat across the table from you, he couldn’t help but look at you as you laughed at something one of your brothers said or did.

There was one time, last year, December 2022, after Brady and Emma had been engaged, when you had gone to see Matthew play against Vancouver. You didn’t know what came over you, but you had texted Quinn. Quinn was not used to random texts from you. It was mainly birthday texts or random pictures that popped up in a Snapchat memory.

“I’m in Vancouver for the game, dinner tonight?”

Before responding to your text, Quinn thought about it. He was never one to have an attraction to a friend’s sister. But he had to admit that you were beautiful. You were no longer just Brady’s younger sister. You were just you.

He agreed to dinner and after the game, which ended in a loss, he asked if Matthew was joining. “He declined to join,” you informed Quinn. Matthew was busy celebrating the win against the Canucks. Plus, you were practically traveling with the team for the week, you had seen enough of Matthew.

It was an awkward dinner at first and then it came to a normal conversation, chatting about how things had been and how you were doing. The conversation fell to the wedding. “I think Emma is going to ask Taryn and I to be in the wedding at Christmas,” you took a swig of your glass of wine.

“Brady already asked me to be in it,” Quinn almost bragged. “Well at least we can be hopeful to be paired up to walk down the aisle. At least I know you won’t let me trip.”

-

Quinn didn’t really hear from you again until the week of the wedding. Your parents were high strung, trying to make sure Brady had the perfect wedding. Matthew and you had been passing a bottle of vodka between the two of you all night when Quinn arrived with his family.

“Matthew, (Y/N), always lovely to see you!” Ellen and Jim Hughes greeted. “How drunk are you?” Quinn leaned over and asked. “I had to deal with the wedding stress somehow,” you laughed.

“And you aren’t even the bride,” Quinn teased.

“Not this time,” you mumbled.

The next coming days were a blur. At the rehearsal dinner, you were paired with Quinn. “Make sure my sister doesn’t fall Hughes!” Matthew warned, slightly overprotective as Quinn held out his arm for you. You couldn’t help but stifle your laughter as Quinn tensed up for a second but relaxed when you leaned over to whisper to him.

“Don’t pay attention to him, he won’t do anything unless he catches us kissing or something.”

At the rehearsal dinner, Taryn got to make her speech. Brady had asked Matthew and you to do one tomorrow at the actual wedding. Throughout the whole rehearsal dinner, all you could do was stare at Quinn. Maybe it was the wine.

The next day was the actual wedding and you didn’t see much of Quinn. The girls were talking in the bridal party area as everyone got their hair done. “What about you (Y/N)? Anyone special in your life?” Emma’s cousin asked.

Your face felt hot. “No, not really.”

Quinn almost froze when he saw you for the first time right before the wedding started. “You look, uh, beautiful,” he stuttered out. “Thanks Quinn, you clean up nice too.” You adjusted his boutonniere to be straighter.

After the ceremony, you were dragged over to the open bar by Josh Norris. He was talking to you about needing to get breakfast with you tomorrow, saying he missed you. You didn’t allow yourself to get too drunk until after your speech.

After your speech, your face was warm and red. The open bar at the wedding was being used to your advantage. Your wine glass never seemed to become empty. You were tired of talking to your parents or family members. Brady was too enamored by Emma to come to talk to you, you couldn’t blame him though. It was his wedding and your non sister-in-law looked beautiful. You ended up at Table 8, visiting with the boys. “Wanna go on a walk Quinn? I need fresh air.” you asked lowly.

Quinn walked you outside, his arm looped in yours. You had been drinking wine most of the night. Maybe it was the alcohol talking or maybe it was feelings that had never come to light after years of knowing one another.

The two of you paused, looking out at the night sky where the ceremony had been held. Quinn looked over at you as you spoke softly about the day. His eyes flickered down to your lips. “Quinn, you okay?” you whispered. You wanted him to kiss you badly.

“We should go back before I do something Brady kills me for,” Quinn whispered, lips hovering above yours.

“What he doesn’t know won’t kill him,” you spoke softly.

-

A knock on Quinn’s door woke him up. Most of the family and wedding party were all staying in the same hotel. Quinn scrambled out of bed, glad that he at least had boxers on. He was barely awake when he cracked open the door.

Matthew stood there. “Sorry to wake you, have you seen (Y/N)? Brady and Emma leave in an hour and my parents want some send off from us.”

“I haven’t seen her since last night, sorry,” Quinn said tiredly. “It’s cool, I’ll check with Josh, I think they said something about getting breakfast together last night.”

Quinn shut the door and took a deep breath. You had woken up at the first knock but didn’t make a movement when your older brother was at the door. As soon as you heard the door lock shut, you threw the blankets off of your head.

You wore Quinn’s dress shirt as a nightgown. Your hair was no longer neat and your bridesmaid dress was draped on the back of the chair in the room. Your shoes were kicked off in minutes last night but you were nervous about getting the dress ruined so Quinn had stopped his actions last night to drape the dress on the back of the chair instead of crumbled on the ground, before returning to you in bed.

“Do you think he knew I was in here?”

[thestoryofusstan]

All I Want For Christmas Is You

part i

pairing: harry styles x fan!singer!reader

summary: harry shows up at your show twice. you're more excited the first time.

warnings: some cursing, some angst, nothing else really!

“happy christmas to you as well,” you answered.

you expected it to be awkward, stiff, forced — anything, really. anything but so alarmingly easy to talk to the same man you obsessed over for years.

i mean, your head was screaming and your insides were turning but on the outside, it was easy.

and the last thing — the last, the very, very last — thing you expected him to do was tug you over to the legendary anne twist and gemma styles.

“y/n, this is m’mum, anne, and m’sister gemma,” he introduced.

you gave what you hoped wasn’t (but knew was) an awkward smile and waved, “hi.”

gemma just threw herself up from the seat and hugged you, “it’s so good to meet you!”

she said that as if you’d known harry for more than fifteen minutes.

or, he’d known you. you knew at the very least of him for 8 years now.

“you too!” you responded, because it felt like the proper reaction.

anne pulled you into a hug as well, albeit far more calm than gemma.

“you did lovely, dear. you have a very nice voice.”

“thank you,” you blushed, even more so when you felt a ring-clad hand rest on your lower back.

“i’m gonna steal her away now. just thought i’d introduce you all.”

you honestly can’t remember what on earth you were so worried about. harry was easy to talk to, and he actually seemed interested in what you were saying. he payed for every little fruity drink you ordered.

and he ordered you so many — you ordered them, he tried to cut you off numerous times but you always swatted him away — that you said probably the stupidest thing ever when your friends mentioned heading out soon.

“d’you wanna come with us? we’ll probably go to jen’s and get blackout drunk,” you laugh.

and you… oh. well, you were just so cute when you asked. wide eyes, dilated pupils from three too many fruity drinks, and a hopeful smile that bordered on just a little anxious, that.. well, really, how could he say no?

“you are already well on your way to blackout drunk,” he teased.

“hey!” you smacked his arm, causing him to laugh and put his hands up in surrender. “and.. i mean, i suppose i can hang around for a bit,” he shrugged. “no harm, right?”

oh, how wrong he was. there was harm in it. so much, in fact. the two of you spent the whole night cuddled up together on jen’s couch until he noticed you falling asleep on him.

he excused the both of you and drove you home, which was a task in and of itself because you were so tired and drunk you didn’t understand what he was asking when he asked what your address was.

and then, when the two of you arrived, he made a comment about how unsafe the area was and how he felt bad leaving you in the house alone. made you promise to lock your doors all the time, and made another comment you almost didn’t catch.

“jus’ gonna have t’find you a better place. this won’t do, pet.”

and you, really, were just expecting his presence in your life to be a one and done thing. but it wasn’t. you woke up the next morning to a text from an unknown number.

Unknown

Had to go home to Mum and Gem, or else I’d have stayed with you in case you got sick. There’s Advil and water on your nightstand. Text me when you’re up. Happy Christmas, again.

H xx

and if you weren’t borderline obsessed with him before, you were now.

the two of you saw each other at least once a week after that. you went to his birthday party and everything. then, on valentines day, he asked you on a date. the two of you went on dates for all of february until he finally asked you to be his girlfriend.

and you said yes. so, you were his girlfriend.

he stayed true to his comment. he bought you a place in the heart of london. a very luxurious, expensive flat. went to all of your gigs like the supportive, doting boyfriend he is.

or.. was.

you dated until june. when he all of a sudden texted you some utter bullshit about ‘not being able to do this anymore’ and cut all contact. blocked your number and on all social medias— although, he didn’t block the secret fan accounts you never told him about which is the only way you knew a crumb of what was going on in his life.

you chose to not go to tabloids for that. they never told the truth, anyway.

the one thing he didn’t stop, though, was paying your rent. you almost wanted to buy your own place and abandon this one to spite him. but how could you?

he left you with the damn dog, too.

oh, that’s right.

the two of you adopted a small beagle in march, right after you moved in. named it sunflower, because he called you sunflower.

(he also found it hilarious that whenever he’d call ‘sunflower’, both of you would appear).

you didn’t even have the heart to rip down all the photos of the two of you throughout the apartment.

they just sat there, collecting dust.

when christmas rolled around again, it was safe to say you were heartbroken at best, depressed at worst.

you moped all day, even when you and your friends opened presents in your apartment.

“so… y/n..” jen spoke as you all were eating dinner.

“hm?” you hummed back.

“did you see what harry did?”

everyone froze.

harry was a sore subject, even six months after the break up.

you cleared your throat, going back to cutting your steal, “uh.. no. no, i didn’t. what?”

“he dropped an album called fine line—“

“oh, good for him, i guess,” you shrug.

“uh.. he.. he dropped it on your.. birthd.. day..” she let out slowly.

you dropped your utensils. “he did what now?”

“.. i’m sorry, i shouldn’t have said anything—“

“he left me— i woke up one morning, and he was just gone and all i get is some stupid fucking text about how he can’t do this anymore, and he pulls this shit? no. no, i’m— absolutely fucking not—“

“that’s.. not.. it,” she winced.

“what? what else could he have possibly done?”

“there’s a song on the album. uh.. called.. sunflower..”

you stood up from the table and stormed to your room, slamming the door.

when you woke up, it was the next day.

and you had a text.

cuntface (harry)

I got your voicemail… baby, I am so sorry. I should’ve asked about the song, and the album. Dropping it on your birthday was uncalled for. I’m sorry. I should’ve reached out. I shouldn’t have even left.

sent at 8:57pm

Baby, come on. Please answer. I’m sorry. Are you alright?

sent at 11:22pm

that motherfucker left you in the dust without a second though, and he had the nerve to act concerned about you? what the hell did you even say in the voicemail?

you tapped a few buttons on your phone until finding said voicemail. you hit play.

“you have a lot of nerve, you know that, harry? you fucking leave me with no other reason besides ‘i can’t do this anymore’.. like.. what kind of fucking excuse is that? and you left me with our fucking dog! our dog! that you named after what you called me! which, by-the-fucking way is a fucking song on this apparent new album of yours that you dropped on my birthday like i was the problem in our relationship! fuck you, harry. fuck you for everything. i-.. god, i can’t even say i hate you, because.. i don’t. i don’t fucking hate you, and i hate that i don’t hate you because i should. i should fucking hate you so much, but i don’t. i’m still in love with you and it’s so fucking pathetic. and that’s your fault. so fuck you, harry. fuck you. you’re not the only one who can write songs.”

you furrowed your brows at the last sentence you said in the voicemail. you didn’t write a song about him, did you?

and then you glanced at your nightstand, and your songbook was thrown open. a whole song written out on a page you are very sure was blank before.

you grab the book, examining the now tear-stained pages before reading the song title.

i should hate you.

well, that’s fitting.

on new years eve, you had a show at the same bar you met harry at. and at the very end of your set, you performed the song you wrote about him.

“so, uh.. i’ve played here before, actually. last christmas, and uh.. i met this.. this guy. huge crush on him, all that shit. we talked for a while, dated for a few months, got a dog together and then he.. just.. kinda left? and didn’t reach out for six months until i cussed him out in a voicemail, where i basically said i was still in love with him!” you laugh awkwardly.

the audience laughs, too.

“so, uh.. yeah. and then after that i was just, like.. i should hate him, so why don’t i? and.. that’s what this song is. this called i should hate you.”

you backed away from the mic slightly as you started strumming and the audience clapped.

“last night i spiraled alone in the kitchen. making pretend that the furniture listened. wasn’t the best of my mental conditions, but i tried thinking of you without any forgiveness.. because i was the one who would stay up and call you. and i’d drive to your house for the shit that you went through.”

driving to his house anytime the press did something to upset him. calling him when he was miles away and it was three in the morning, and you had a shift at the coffee shop at six.

“and i wasted my breath when i tried to console you, didn’t i?”

anytime she’d comfort him about the horrible things tabloids said, he’d reject it.

“‘cause we didn’t happen the way we were supposed to.”

in your head, you were happily together and nothing ever went wrong in june. he was in the audience tonight cheering you on, smiling at you when you made eye contact. that’s how it should.

“i know that i should hate you. i know that i should hate you. pulled the knife out my back, it was right where you left it.”

trying to console you after your voicemail, months too late.

“but you aimed kinda perfect, i’ll give you the credit.”

you opened up to him and it felt like he used that against you when he left like that. he knew exactly how to make it hurt to the point it was unbearable.

“i just drank something strong to try to forget, but it wasn’t right. no, you’re not even here, but you’re doing my head in. i know that i should hate you. i know that i should hate you. i know that i should hate you. ooh, ooh. i should hate you, i feel stupid like i almost crashed my car driving home to talk about you at my table in the dark.”

you did do that. you went to one of your spots in london (a little book store that was rarely busy) and afterwards, you sped home so fast you almost crashed. you just needed to talk about him, but nobody was home. because he left.

“all i ever think about is where the hell you even are.”

you always wondered where he was, how he was doing, if he hurt the way you did. if he felt it right in his chest the way you did.

“and i swear to god i’d kill you if i loved you less hard.”

you’d kill him if you didn’t love him. you’d hate him if you weren’t still in love with him.

“after all of this time, i still get disappointed.”

after the voicemail, you expected him to show up at your door and fix everything. he didn’t. of course, he didn’t. because, even if he still payed for the house, it wasn’t his home anymore. it was just yours.

“bet you’re doing alright, and you don’t even know it.”

from the bits and pieces you managed to see of his life, he was living it up. while you cried.

“how it’s all ‘cause of you that my standards are broken.”

before, you’d been like every other girl. saying your standards were high, because your standards were harry styles. it just so happened to be that he was the one to lower those standards.

“i would bend back to you if you left the door open..”

if he came back, you’d come running.

“i know that i should hate you. i know that i should hate you. i know that i should hate you. ooh, ooh. i know that i should hate you. i know that i should hate you. i know that i should hate you. ooh, ooh.”

with the last note, you bowed. and then left the stage as everyone cheered.

you planned on just leaving. but something in you wanted a drink before hopping in the uber. so you ran up to the bar.

“a shirley temple, please,” you asked.

the bartender nodded and you sat in silence (save for the usual noise of the bar) until—

“y/n.”

a familiar voice. too familiar. it made you freeze.

your name from his lips was a statement. not a question, this time.

you finally turned, your eyes meeting familiar green ones.

“.. harry.”

deja fucking vu.

“i am so—“

“here’s your shirley temple to go, ma’am.”

you have never been more grateful for a drink. you turned and thanked the bartender quietly, grabbing the drink before speeding off.

“wh— y/n!”

you kept walking until you were halfway down the street and he grabbed your arm, forcing you to turn around.

“don’t. don’t do this, don’t run away from me— from us—“

“you ran away from us first, harry! i was all in! i was ready for whatever, and you just up and left like it meant nothing— like i meant nothing! do you know how that felt? do you even have an idea of what the felt like?”

he didn’t say anything.

“i didn’t think so.”

“please, baby— sunflower, i jus’ wanna talk.”

“i have nothing to say to you, harry.”

a/n: … hahahaha!

[harlowcomehome]

Wrapping your room:

A/N: I’ve been seeing this prank on tiktok where people wrap someone’s entire bedroom in wrapping paper. I thought it would be cute to do to Jack. Happy holidays! 🤭

You were sitting on the couch wrapping some of Jack's gifts when Hazel suddenly came running into the living room.

“Mommy, I have an idea!” She was holding her iPad close to her, hiding something from you with a giggle.

“Yeah?” You smirked as you continued to wrap the gift in front of you.

“Do we have more wrapping paper somewhere?” Hazel looked over your shoulder at the multiple rolls beside you.

“What are you up to little lady?” You looked up, finally giving her your full attention.

“I saw this video online” She handed you her iPad and you began watching.

The person in the video wrapped the entire room in wrapping paper as a prank. The person's bed, pillows, walls, and everything in the room was completely wrapped in Christmas wrapping paper.

“Daddy won’t be back until tomorrow so I was thinking we could do that to the bedroom” she giggled as you handed her the iPad back.

“We could do our bedroom, but I’d have to stay in the guest room until tomorrow” You laughed, knowing it would be a lot of work but funny nonetheless.

“Do you think he will think it’s funny or be upset?“ She was starting to second-guess her plan.

“Hell definitely think it’s funny. I’m sure your Uncle Clay would too, I can ask him to help!”

“ I don’t want you to have to sleep in the guestroom. We can do daddies studio?” Hazel suggested earning an “absolutely not” from you.

“You’re right, Daddy would probably be mad, and throw another man-trum” she laughed, slapping a hand over her mouth as she repeated something she had heard you say.

Jade shuffled into the living room, she had her blanket draped around her shoulders and stuffed cardinal in her hands.

“Sissy! Look!” Hazel showed her the video on her iPad, but Jade was too sleepy to care.

You opened up an app on your phone, motioning for the girls to sit beside you, as you lightly patted the couch cushion.

“Both of you pick four rolls each.” You knew you needed to buy some bows for the girls to stick on as well as make a mental note of it.

You finished wrapping Jack's gifts as the girls sat beside you giggling over the idea.

“So excited” Jade giggled as she mumbled to herself.

Once you had placed the order for the wrapping paper and bows you organized the bedroom before calling Clay and letting him know the plan.

“Hazel thought of this?” He laughed on the other line.

“Sure did.”

“This is definitely something Jack would’ve done to me as a kid. Now it’s karma!” he belly laughed before letting you know he’d be over soon.

When the order arrived with all the supplies, you sent a quick text to Clay. The girls were in the living room eager to start the prank.

The two of them followed you into the bedroom as you set everything down.

Hazel knew how to wrap gifts however Jade did not.

“Jadey baby, you’re on bow duty.” You handed her a bag of miscellaneous colored metallic bows.

“When mommy and I are done wrapping something you can put a bow on top!” Hazel continued and Jade nodded.

Clay showed up with lunch about thirty minutes after you had started, letting the girls have a break.

“Uncle Clay!” Hazel and Jade ran over to him practically knocking him down.

“Is that for us?” Hazel asked wide-eyed as she noticed her stomach starting to growl.

“Two personal pizzas for my little queens” he laughed handing the boxes to Hazel.

“Thank you Uncle” both girls giggled as they skipped off to the kitchen table.

“Thanks for that” you smiled, wiping the sweat from your forehead with your forearm.

“I got you something too” he handed you a bag. “Let me take over from here, go eat!”

You thanked him and went to sit with the girls at the kitchen table, smiling as the two of them giggled and got along.

Your phone began to ring, showing Jack's contact ID. You stood up from the table and walked into the bedroom to signal to Clay not to say anything.

“Hi, handsome!”

“Hi beautiful” he rasped, you could tell he was exhausted by his tone.

“How’s it going?”

“Good, good. I was calling to let you know we wrapped up early and I’ll be home tonight instead of tomorrow. I’m on my way to the airport now.”

You were silent, eyes wide as you started to panic.

“Sweetheart?”

“That’s great babe! Let me know when you’re boarding. I have to go, Jade got into something. I love you!” you felt bad for lying but shoved your phone into your jeans as you ran into the bedroom.

“We have to hurry, he’ll be home tonight as in… a few hours.”

“Fu- fudge” Clay smiled as his nieces stood in the doorway.

The four of you worked quickly to finish the other half of the bedroom, barely finishing as Jack had sent you his Uber details.

You softly shut the door making sure Olive was still in the living room and Lucky was asleep in his dog bed.

“Are you staying to watch Daddy's reaction?” Hazel giggled as her Uncle started to look for his car keys.

“Yeah! Stay” you smirked knowing Jack was already around the corner.

The door began to unlock and Jack immediately knew something was up by the look on Clay's face.

“Hi baby” You walked over to him and kissed him before the girls started to tug on him.

“Daddy. We got you a BIG present!” Jade giggled, earning a glare from her older sister.

Jack peered at you through narrowed eyes as you tried to hide a laugh, looking over to his brother as he shared the same expression.

Jack looked around the living room suspiciously, making everyone laugh.

“Lucky? What’s going on buddy?” He picked up the family dog and noticed your shared bedroom door was wrapped, looking over the pink gingerbread house design.

“Why is that wrapped?” He pointed as he walked forward and into the bedroom.

Clay was recording the entire thing behind you as he followed all of you into the room.

Jack placed Lucky on the ground, earning giggles from everyone behind him when he stood there in shock.

“What the- even the pillows?” He couldn’t control his laughter, doubling over as the girls ran over to him and tackled him the rest of the way to the ground.

“Do you like it? I did the bows!” Jade giggled as Jack sat down on the floor admiring the room.

“I love the bows bug” he reassured her.

“What about the room?” Hazel watched her dad’s expressions.

“Yeah Hazey! I love it. I’m loving the dedication that’s for sure” he shook his head looking over to you and Clay who continued to laugh in the corner, Clay still recording.

“Even my shoes?” Jack noticed his shoes that were at the end of the bed had been wrapped.

“Nice touch” you whispered to Clay.

“Now we have to unwrap it all!” Hazel ran over to the bed, ripping the paper dramatically as Jade mirrored her.

“That’s always the best part” Jack smirked as he stood up and started ripping paper off of things.

“Come on! You two have to help” he motioned for you and Clay to join in on the fun.

Jack tickled your side as you walked over to him, “I hope I get to unwrap you later” he whispered in a raspy tone.

“We do have a babysitter” You looked over to Clay who was distracted and helping the girls.

“That’s true. We do” he agreed with a smirk.

[watchmegetobsessed]

MIDNIGHT CRUSH

A/N: another year full of fanfics behind is!! it's crazy how fast 2022 has passed by, thank you for being here all year, thank you for reading my works, for all the messages and kind words!! hope to see many of you next year on this hell site haha!

WORD COUNT: 3.6k

SUMMARY: Harry has had a crush on Sarah's sister for a long time and this year, at the NYE party he can finally shoot his shot, because she's freshly single.

MASTERLIST | SUPPORT ME!

“So, what should I bring for the party?” Harry asks as he, Sarah and Mitch enter the couple’s home following their Christmas lunch together that Harry invited them out for.

“Just yourself,” Sarah smiles.

“Booze,” Mitch says at the same time, making his friend laugh.

“Got it. And who is coming?”

The three of them walk into the kitchen as Sarah grabs a bottle of wine from the fridge to pour them all a drink. Harry climbs to a stool by the kitchen island and mumbles a thank you when she hands him his glass.

“Mostly the same people we always invite,” Mitch shrugs. “Oh, and Sarah’s sister.”

Harry almost chokes on the wine, the pair exchanging an amused look, because they expected him to react like this.

“Y-Your sister is coming? Y/N?”

“Yeah,” Sarah nods smiling. “You know, she was planning to stay home, but I can’t let her celebrate alone, not after the year she had.”

“Why? What happened?”

“Oh, you don’t know?” Sarah smirks, knowing well Harry most likely has no idea what happened to you just a few months ago. “She broke up with her boyfriend.”

“Y/N is single?” Harry’s eyes are basically popping out of his head before he tries to control his face and rephrase his reaction. “I mean, what happened with them? I thought they were doing fine.”

“The dude was an ass,” Mitch speaks up, leaning against the counter. “We don’t have proof, but I’m pretty sure he cheated on her.”

“What?!”

“Yeah, well, it wasn’t working either, so she broke up with him in… what, like October? I don’t remember,” Sarah shrugs.

“Oh, wow. They’ve been together for a long time, right?”

“Three years,” Mitch nods.

“She’s been pretty bummed, so I want to get her out of her little cave,” Sarah smiles, taking a sip from her drink.

“So she’ll be at the party,” Harry hums.

“Yeah. You two got along well, didn’t you?”

“Uh, yeah, you could… say that.”

That is an understatement and all three of them knows. To be exact, Harry fell in love with you probably the moment he laid his eyes on you at Sarah’s birthday party last year, but you were happily dating Matthew who couldn’t come to the party because of a work trip. You and Harry hit it off right away and you were inseparable the whole time, he felt like as if it wasn’t the very first time he met you, like you were good friends since forever.

Finding out that you were in a long term relationship was like a slap across his face, but he tried his best to mask his disappointment. Every time the two of you saw each other he forced himself to keep a distance, but always failed and ended up falling for you even harder. He could feel his heart breaking every time you went home to your boyfriend and he knew he should forget about you, but it was easier said than done.

But now you’re single and he’ll be seeing you again and for the first time, he won’t have to be ashamed to be pining after you.

“Just make sure you don’t drool when she arrives,” Mitch teases him, to which Harry just rolls his eyes.

He was already excited about the party, but now it feels like a second Christmas, he counts down the days until the last one of the year finally arrives. He tries to busy himself during the day and not get ready at one pm for the party that starts at seven. He watches movies, cleans the kitchen, scribble down new lyrics, but nothing keeps him occupied long enough to stop him from thinking about seeing you again.

He even stalks you online, something he never does, but this time he just cannot stop himself. Though your Instagram account doesn’t give away much. Just a handful of pictures, from the past few years, only two of them were taken exclusively of you, one at a sandy beach and another one from two Christmases away, looking cozy under the tree with all the gifts around you. There are a few with Sarah and Mitch, some photos of hills, forests and lakes, Harry remembers you told him how much you like going on hikes and exploring new places.

The last post was six months ago, four hands holding drinks meeting in the air, one single wine glass emoji as the caption.

Harry wonders if you had more posts up with your ex, photos where you kiss, where he is hugging you from behind, photos that would definitely turn him into a jealous little gremlin in an instant.

It’s past three when he finally gives up and gets ready. He takes a steamy shower, even attempts to style his hair before spending an obscene amount of time in his closet, trying to find the best outfit for the occasion.

By four he is fully clothed and ready to leave the house, even though he still has hours. He feels like a total fool, roaming around the house, pretending like his pants doesn’t feel like they are on fire.

It’s past five when his phone rings, Sarah’s smiley face appearing on the screen.

“Hey, you’re driving over, right?” she asks when he answers the call.

“Yeah. Do you need me to pick something up on my way?”

“Yes, well, not something, but someone. Y/N’s car broke down, do you think you could…”

“YES!”

“…give her a ride?” she finished chuckling at his enthusiastic response.

“Sorry,” he huffs out a laugh. “I can totally pick her up.”

“Great, you’re a lifesaver. I’ll text you her address, you think you could be there at six thirty?”

“Sure, absolutely!”

“Alright, see you two soon then.”

He fights the urge to jump around the living room like a kid. A minute later his phone chimes and as he opens the message from Sarah, he stares down at the address with never ending excitement. There’s something oddly intimate in knowing where you live, up until moments ago the two of you only existed at parties and Sarah and Mitch’s wedding with lots of people around you, but now he’ll have a glimpse of the home that’s just yours.

He has a fleeting idea of getting you flowers on his way, but that would be just way too much, this isn’t a date, though he wishes it was. He’s just picking you up to drive you to the party you both will be attending.

Parking down in front of a cozy looking townhouse he gives himself a peptalk before getting out of the car and walking up to the front door. He hears the bell ring through the house as he waits for you, a pair of high-heeled feet approaching the door in a hurry and when it flies open, Harry forgets to breathe and blink.

Because there you are, in a stunning, elegant black dress, your hair pinned up, your makeup appears natural, but he notices how glowy your skin is and you gift him with a bright smile upon seeing him on your doormat.

“Hi!” you greet him.

“Hi,” he smiles, finally putting his lungs to work.

“Let me just grab my coat and then we can leave.”

He nods as you reach to the side, taking a simple black coat off the hanger and when he sees you struggle to put it on he’s quick to help it onto your shoulders.

“Thank you, you’re such a gentleman,” you chuckle softly, grabbing your purse from the side table before stepping out and locking the door. Harry can feel himself blush, even the tip of his ears are getting hot at your simple compliment.

“You look wonderful, by the way.”

“Thank you, you cleaned up nice too,” you smile as the two of you walk back to his car. “Thank you so much for the ride, I really should buy a new car already, but it’s my first car, I’m too sentimental to get rid of it,” you sigh, buckling yourself up as Harry starts the car.

“So it’s an old friend, huh?”

“You could say that.”

The ride to Sarah and Mitch’s place is filled with comfortable small talk, catching up about what happened since the last time you saw each other, but Harry makes sure to avoid asking you about your ex. He’s not sure how you stand with that situation and the last thing he wants to do is to upset you.

Every time you laugh at something he says it feels like a victory and he just wants to hear that sound every day. He wishes his friends lived farther away so he could spend more time with you alone, but eventually you arrive to your sister’s home and the bubble pops.

“Hi sis!” you hug Sarah lovingly when you walk in, the two hosts greeting you warmly.

“So glad you’re here,” she pats your back, exchanging a knowing look.

Harry is snatched away from your side just moments after his arrival and this one time he wishes he wasn’t such a good company among his friends. But he keeps an eye on your at all times, he sees you mingling, sipping on your drink and every time you laugh at something jealousy tightens his chest.

“Dude, you promised not to drool,” Mitch teases him when he catches Harry staring at you once again.

“Fuck off,” he huffs, taking a sip from his drink.

“Just go talk to her.”

“I’m trying not to be a weirdo,” he sighs, making his friend laugh. “And I don’t want to be pushy, I don’t know if she’s over her ex already.”

“Mm, don’t be a pussy,” Mitch teases him before walking away.

Harry loses track of you for just five minutes while he uses the bathroom and when he returns you’re nowhere to be found. At first he just keeps looking, hoping you’d show up somewhere, but you never come.

“Hey, have you seen your sister?” Harry asks when he finds Sarah in the kitchen, refilling the chips bowl.

“I think I last saw her going upstairs,” she shrugs.

He lurks through the guests and makes his way upstairs, not too discreetly looking for you in every room he passes by, until he finally finds you in one of the guest bedrooms. You’re sitting on the edge of the bed your heels has been kicked off and you’re staring out the window, lost in your thoughts.

“Hey, where did you go?” he softly asks, walking over and sitting next to you.

“Ah, I just… it became a little too crowded for me,” you shrug shyly. “Wanted to have a break from the chit-chatting.”

“Do you want me to leave?” he asks, feeling like he is bothering you with his presence.

“Oh, no! That’s not what I meant,” she chuckles, her hand brushing against his knee for a second, the tiny gesture etching into his memory forever instantly. “I just lost my energy for small talk, but it’s not like that with you. I’m trying to recharge, but I wish I brought some booze with me.”

“I’ll get us something,” he offers. “I mean, if you still don’t mind having me here with you.”

“Won’t you be missed down there?” you look up at him curiously as he stands from the bed.

“They’ll survive without me,” he shrugs smiling.

“Then I would love to have your company.”

God, those words are like honey dripping from your perfect lips. He quickly makes his way down, hunting for a bottle of alcohol the two of you can share. He finds a bottle of champagne, snatches two glasses and dodges every attempt to drag him into a conversation as he returns upstairs, excitement filling his chest to have some more alone time with you.

“Oh, great!” you beam when you see him holding up the bottle and handing you a glass he pours you a drink, the fills his glass as well before the two of you settle back on the bed. “Mm, this will numb me well,” you let out a tired sigh. “Maybe I shouldn’t have come.”

“Why? You seemed like you were having a good time.”

“I’m good at masking,” you huff out a bitter laugh. “It’s just so frustrating…”

“What is?”

“Am I so boring that all people want to talk about is my exboyfriend?” you ask, surprising Harry with bringing him up. He also can’t help a tiny frown.

“Not at all,” he shakes his head, taking a sip from his drink.

“Then why did I have to dodge questions about him like a million times the past two hours? Like… I’m a person outside of Matthew, hello!”

Harry’s unsure what to say. If you asked he would tell off every single person downstairs who made you feel like this.

You look at him with a tiny smile.

“Thanks for not bringing him up.”

“I…” he starts. I’ve had my selfish reasons, he wants to say, but swallows the words. “Just wanted you to have a good time,” he ends up saying.

The champagne bottle starts to empty out and the two of you are having a private party of your own, having a blast away from all the guests. Sprawled out on the bouncy mattress you talk and laugh and play silly little games as the clock is ticking towards midnight and the new year.

You’re definitely feeling dizzy, not drunk, but the champagne has loosened you up enough to be a giggling mess. Harry is sitting with his back against the headboard while you’re lounging across the bed, your legs tangled with his.

“Ah, I missed this,” you let out a pleased sigh.

“Missed what?”

“Having fun,” you huff out a laugh. “It’s been a bitter few months.”

“We can hang out more,” Harry suggests, his hands reaching out, gently massaging your calf. He’s been fighting the urge for a while, but he feels like you’re comfortable in your little bubble enough to allow this physical contact. You don’t move away, even let a tiny moan slip through your lips at the pressure of his touch and pride fills his chest.

“Be careful, I might end up at your doorstep every single day,” you joke.

“Feel free to do so,” he replies, fully meaning his words.

Your head rolls to the side to look at him, a soft smile stretched across your face as you blink at him lazily.

“Wouldn’t want to bother you.”

“Impossible.”

“What about when you’d want to be with a woman? Go on dates?”

“I don’t do that,” he shrugs.

“I don’t believe you,” you grin at him. “There’s no way you’re not dating supermodels and movie stars…”

“Oh, but I’m not,” he chuckles, his eyes fixated on his hands working on your calves.

“Come on! You gotta have a crush on some insanely gorgeous woman!” you tease him more, but

“It’s you,” he blurts it out, his honesty surprising the both of you. “I have a crush on you,” he then adds.

His eyes shyly move up to meet your gaze, but your face is too blank to read anything off of it as you blink back at him, lips slightly parted. A minute passes by and he starts to regret that he couldn’t hold his tongue. You then push yourself up into a sitting position, eyes still glued to his face.

“Really?” is all you say when you finally break the silence.

“I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have just blurted it out.”

“No, it’s… I just…” It’s hard to find the right words and Harry is patient with you, but a knock is heard on the door and he almost curses out whoever is on the other side.

“Hello? Are you guys in here?” Sarah’s head pops in before the rest of her body follows, taking in the sight of the two of you on the bed. “Hey, ten minutes until midnight. Are you guys joining us?”

“Yeah,” you nod, sounding breathless and Harry can feel himself deflating. The moment is gone, you know he is into you, but your reaction wasn’t quite what he was expecting.

He watches you climb off the bed and is sure you’ll just walk out with your sister, leaving him behind, but when you put your heels back on you turn to him with a warm smile.

“Come on, we can’t miss the countdown.”

He’s stunned at your friendly behavior, but he just nods and follows you, the three of you returning to the rest of the guests downstairs. The party is buzzing, everyone is excited to greet the new year, but Harry can only care about you. Both of you get a flute of champagne and standing in the corner of the room, you’re a bit awkwardly wait for the countdown to start.

Then the last ten seconds arrive and Harry’s mind is racing more than ever. Where do you stand? Did he ruin everything? You won’t even want to be friends with him? After all the pining, is this really how he had to admit his feelings to you?

He hates how quiet you are next to him, how he has no idea what you wanted to say before Sarah arrived and he would kill to read your mind.

“Ten! Nine! Eight! Seven!...”

He bites the inside of his cheeks, nervously switching his weight from one leg to the other, staring ahead of him.

“Six! Five! Four!”

He can faintly hear you take a deep breath and from the corner of his eyes he can see you turn towards him. Your gazes meet and his heart is brutally hammering in his chest when your eyes flicker down to his lips for a split second.

“Three! Two! One! Happy New Year!”

There’s a heartbeat of hesitation in you before you splurge forward and press your lips against his, only to pull back almost immediately, afraid that you did something wrong. But Harry is quick to silence your worries when his hand grabs the back of your neck and he pulls you back in for a lot longer and more passionate kiss that the previous one.

He grins against your lips when he hears someone cheer on the two of you, judging from the voice it’s Mitch, but Harry doesn’t bother to check, he’s way too busy kissing you over and over again. He never even plans to stop, but you shriek out a laugh when he accidentally spills some of his champagne on you while trying to wrap his arms around your waist, coordinating with the flute in his hand.

“Oh shit, I’m sorry,” he gasps, placing the glass to the nearest surface instantly before he could pour more on you.

“It’s okay,” you chuckle, wiping the fabric with your hand on your hip.

“I got a little… carried away,” he breathes out with a smirk, but you just shake your head grinning up at him, your gaze lacing together with his once more and before you could even think about your actions, you push closer to him and kiss him. You simply can’t stop, you need to be touching and kissing him as if you could die if you took even just a step away from him.

For the rest of the evening the two of you turn into giddy teenagers. Not wanting to be rude you stay downstairs with the rest of the guest, mingling feels easies for Harry with you by his side. He keeps a hand on the small of your back at all times and every time your eyes meet, he can’t help but steal a quick kiss.

It’s past three in the morning when you leave your sister’s home and Harry drives you back home. The ride is silent, but it’s comfortable, the moments you shared tonight speak for you.

“Can I call you tomor—erm, later today?” Harry chuckles when he realizes it’s already the next day.

“Absolutely,” you smile and you both move towards each other at the same time, lips meeting over the console before you get out of his car. You wave at him from the front door, watching him drive away with the cheesiest, most lovesick smile on your face.

Though Harry is still buzzing from the events of the night when he goes to bed, it doesn’t take long for him to fall asleep. It’s been a long and memorable day, he needs to recharge before jumping into the new exciting year.

He has just put on the coffee to brew when his phone starts buzzing on the kitchen counter. He rubs his eyes before snatching it and checking the screen, an unknown number flashing on the screen.

“Hello?” he answers hesitantly.

“It’s me.” He recognizes your voice in an instant, eyes popping wide open and he didn’t even need the caffeine.

“Hi!” he breathes out, trying his best not to sound too excited, though he fails, because he hears your chuckle on the other end of the line.

“I’m glad you’re up, Sarah said you might sleep in late when I asked for your number.”

“I just woke up, actually.”

“Good. You can let me in then.”

“What…” he gapes and then hears the doorbell ring.

He drops the phone to the counter without even ending the call as he sprints to the door in his slippers, almost tripping on his way before he flings the front door open just to find you on his doormat.

“Well, I told you I would just show up at your place every day,” you chuckle. “Do you want to spend the first day of the year together?” you ask, noticeably nervous about his reaction, but he melts at your presence and he takes your hand before pulling you in.

“Wouldn’t want to spend it with anyone else.”

Thank you for reading, please like and reblog if you enjoyed and buy me a coffee if you want to support me!

[lives-in-midgard]

🎄Christmas proposal

Pairing: Steve Rogers x reader

Summary: Steve asks you a very special and life changing question on Christmas day.

Word Count: 1135

A/N: Thank you for sending me this sweet request! When I saw this prompt I immediately had to think of this request, so I thought why not combinate them. I really hope you like how this turned out! 💗

Divider made by @saradika.

Prompt 20: "I can't imagine life without you."

(prompt from @buckys-wintersoldier )

Masterlist | Fluffcember Masterlist

It’s Christmas morning and you woke up in your boyfriend’s embrace. Steve had his arm wrapped around you while you had your head on his chest. You’ve been a couple for a few years now and moved in together a few months ago. You had been through a lot together and were finally living a more peaceful life since Steve decided to stop going on missions as often as he used to. You love Christmas and will be heading to the compound later to celebrate with the Avengers.

“Good morning sweetheart.” Steve whispered and placed a kiss on your forehead. You smiled, looked up and placed your hand on his cheek to give him a kiss.

“Good morning, babe.” You said, laying your head back on his chest. You cuddled for a while and Steve rubbed your back.

“We should get going soon.” Steve said and you looked up at him.

“Just five more minutes, please.” He chuckled, but then smiled softly.

“Okay, but then we really have to go. I don’t want to be late on the compound.”

“We won’t be late. We still have a lot of time left.” You assured him and cuddled for a few more minutes until you both decided to really get up now. After you got ready and went back to the bedroom. You saw Steve standing in front of the mirror. He mumbled something to himself and looked nervous. When he heard you, he immediately stopped and pretended to fix his hair. You moved closer to him and hugged him from behind. When he turned around, you kissed him.

“I love you so much sweetheart.” Steve said after he the kiss and you smiled at him.

“Aww Steve, I love you too.” You took his hand and walked into the kitchen. Steve and you prepared breakfast together. You could tell that something was bothering him. He’s been looking kind of strange the last few days. Sometimes he was so lost in thought that he didn’t hear anything said to him. You thought it was probably because it was a stressful time and maybe he was nervous about today. Steve hadn’t eaten much, and you were starting to worry about him.

“Stevie is everything okay?” You asked while putting the plates in the dishwasher.

“Of course, honey.” He smiled at you and gave you a kiss on the cheek.

“Okay, but you know that you can tell me if something bothers you, right?”

“Of course, I know that.” Steve confirmed and pulled you into a hug. A few minutes later, the two of you decided to get dressed for the Christmas party on the compound. You put on the beautiful dress you bought a while ago and Steve put on a suit.

As you drove, Steve turned on the radio and you started singing along. Steve looked over at you smiling and you smiled back. When you arrived on the compound, Steve opened the door for you. With one hand he carried the bag with the gifts for the others and with the other he held your hand. You opened the door to the living room and saw all the Avengers gathered. There were Christmas decorations everywhere and Christmas carols were playing in the background. You placed the presents at the Christmas tree and then greeted them. You all talked, laughed and had fun together.

After dinner it was time for the presents. You all stood around the tree and gave gifts one by one. For most of them, you and Steve had a gift together. As Tony handed Peter his gift, you noticed Steve getting nervous next to you. You took his hand in yours and he smiled at you.

“Why are you so nervous, honey?” You asked him. Steve looked away for a second and then answered you.

“I’m actually a little nervous about how you’ll react to my gift.” He confessed and you chuckled.

“Oh Steve, you don’t have to be nervous, I will probably love it, like always.” Steve smiled and started to blush. He still looked nervous, so you decided to kiss him.

“Hey lovebirds, now it’s your time for the presents.” Tony interrupted you and Steve. Looking over at the others you could see Bucky winking at Steve and the others were all smiling and looking curious to see your gifts for each other. Because Steve was nervous, you thought of giving him your present first.

“Let me start with mine.” You said and walked to the tree to get your gift. You grabbed the small gift and then gave it to Steve. He had a big smile on his face when he opened it.

“Wow, I love this.” Steve said when he saw your present.

“I’m glad you like it, but now it’s time for yours, honey.” You didn’t really understand what was happening until Steve suddenly knelt on the floor. Steve smiled when he pulled a small box out of his suit. Your hand wandered to cover your mouth. You couldn’t believe what he was up to.

“Y/n. You are the love of my live, I can’t imagine life without you and I don’t know where I would be without you now. Will you marry me?” Steve finished and you could see the nervousness in him again.

“OMG yes, of course I will.” You blurred happily as a few tears of joy streamed down your face. Steve put the ring on your finger, and you looked at it for a second and then back at your boyfriend, or should I now say fiancé.

“I love you so much, Steve.”

“And I love you.” Steve cupped your face and gave you a long, passionate kiss. When you broke the kiss and smiled at each other, you could hear the other Avengers clapping and cheering in the background. You turned around and saw how happy they all were. You turned back to Steve and hugged him. You were so happy with Steve and the Avengers as your friends.

It’s been a few months since Steve proposed to you. You loved it when you were somewhere and could call Steve your fiancé, but that will change on this wonderful day. Because after this day, you could call him your husband.

All the people you love were there, including the Avengers, your family, a few friends and of course your husband. You still couldn’t really believe it until you walked down the aisle, saw all your loved ones and then saw Steve standing there. A tear rolled down your face, but you were smiling. You both said your vows and you were finally able to kiss your husband. You can’t wait to spend your life with Steve by your side.

Taglist:

@marvelogic | @rogersbarber | @eviebuggg | @nicoline1998enilocin | @nekoannie-chan | @kandis-mom | @sergeantbarnessdoll | @noellez-best-life23 | @buckskemp | @whiskeytangofoxtrot555 | @cutedisneygrl @mrs-bucky-barnes-73 | @mrsbuckybarnes1917

[cariantha]

A Solid Strategy

Book: Open Heart, Book 2 Pairing: Dr. Ethan Ramsey x F!MC (Dr. Sawyer Brooks) Rating: General Warning: None Category: Rewrite; Angsty Fluff Word count: 1.1K Summary: Ethan loses his temper after Sawyer makes an impulsive decision.

“Sawyer!”

Ethan’s deep booming cry reverberated off the walls of the expansive atrium.  

She grabbed Lamar’s wrist just before he jumped off the narrow ledge. The confused man dangled precariously over the atrium as patients and staff watched in horror below.

Just as Sawyer’s feet lifted from the floor, Ethan slammed his body against hers, pinning her against the railing.

A strong arm wrapped around her waist, holding on for dear life, while another reached over the railing to grab Lamar’s flailing free hand. 

“I’m okay,” she promised with her feet once again planted firmly to the ground. “I’ve got this side. Let’s pull him up.” 

Together, they hauled their patient to safety and gently restrained him until additional help arrived. 

The scene was under control not long after. Lamar had been escorted back to his room by a couple of interns and hospital security. 

“Are you hurt?” Ethan asked, scanning Sawyer up and down.

She rubbed her abdomen where she had been crushed between him and the railing. “I’ll probably have some bruises tomorrow, but otherwise, I’m fine.”

“Are you sure?”

She nodded. 

“Then arrange the test and check in with Mrs. Stevenson to see if she has any questions about the procedure.”

He had already spun on his heel and started walking away before she could even say "Okay."

<><><><><><><><><><>

A while later, Sawyer tracked her boss down to his private office. With the door ajar, she peered inside.

Ethan sat at his desk, seemingly in deep thought as he stared at a picture of his late friend Dolores. The framed photograph that Sawyer gifted him last Christmas.

“There you are,” she greeted. “Anesthesiology is short-staffed today, so we won’t be able to do Lamar’s spinal tap until tomorr-”

Sawyer jumped in surprise when Ethan stood and slammed his hands on the desk, cutting her off.

“Don’t you ever pull a stunt like that again. Do I make myself clear, Dr. Brooks?” he admonished.

The adrenaline rush had worn off. His neck turned crimson with fury as the feelings that had been suppressed by his body’s natural fight-or-flight response now bubbled to the surface. 

“W-What? I…,” she stammered, caught off guard by his severe tone and the use of her last name. “I-I’m sorry. I…I didn’t think. I just reacted.” 

“No, you didn’t. You didn’t think at all. A man that size could have easily pulled you over that railing with him. He nearly did!” 

“Ethan, I-”

He motioned for her to stop talking. “I don’t want to hear your excuses. You’re lucky I don’t write you up for demonstrating reckless behavior and poor judgment.”

“He would have died! I had to do something,” she argued, cheeks burning hot with indignation.

“Your job is to save lives with medicine. You were not hired to be a goddamn superhero.”

“He wasn’t in his right mind, Ethan. I wasn’t going to let him hurt himself. And I wasn’t going to let that poor woman watch the man she loves fall to his death.”

Her words only enraged him further. “But you would let me watch you,” he thought to himself. 

Ethan hung his head low and took a couple deep breaths to control his temper before speaking again. 

“It would have been a terrible and unfortunate circumstance if Mr. Stevenson had hurt himself, but it would have been much worse if I…,” he cleared his throat, correcting his course, “...if we had unnecessarily lost two lives.”

Sawyer silently processed his words, having caught his slip. 

The way she looked at him, it felt as though she was daring him to say what he really meant. And it infuriated him. 

Too proud to admit his feelings and determined to keep their relationship professional, he hid behind his condemnation.

“You’re done for the day. Go home. I’ll find someone to take over your cases,” he barked.

Fighting back tears of frustration, Sawyer nodded and walked away.

She was only halfway down the hall when she stopped in her tracks. Looking back toward the now closed office door, she replayed their interaction in her mind. Though his words were cutting, and his temperament harsh, Sawyer suddenly felt bad for him. She had seen this side of Ethan before. This was the lashing out of a man who was afraid of losing someone he cared about.

A moment later, the door to his office opened and closed. 

Ethan stood with his back to the door, staring out the window. 

“I thought I told you to go home,” he growled, seeing her reflection in the glass.

Sawyer approached him cautiously but confidently, refusing to be cowed by his anger.

He turned to face her, prepared for the impending clash. An accusation of insubordination readied on the tip of his tongue.

She stopped within arms reach. With soft eyes she met his scrutinizing ones, and she waited until he discerned there was no fight to be had. Then lunging forward, Sawyer wrapped her arms around his torso.

He remained rigid, arms hanging at his sides.

Resting her chin on his shoulder, she apologized softly in his ear. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to scare you. If the roles were reversed, I’d feel the same way about you.” 

After a few seconds, she swatted him between the shoulder blades. “Stop being a jerk and hug me back.”

Ethan finally surrendered. He folded his arms around her and rested his head against the side of hers. 

Exhaling a deep, shaky breath, he released his remaining tension. 

“I owe you an apology,” he began, still holding her tight. “Though I stand by the sentiment, I am sorry for losing my temper.”

Sawyer placed a tender kiss on his jacketed shoulder. “Thank you.”

After a long, indulgent embrace, he pulled back and sighed.

“Christ, Rookie. How do you always seem to find trouble? How can I ever let you out of my sight?”

“Uh-oh. You’re on to me,” she winked. 

“I am somewhat serious. Have you forgotten when I found you turning blue behind the nurses’ station? Or your ethics trial?”

“Pft,” she waved him off. 

“Have you already forgotten when you nearly broke your neck at the Stevenson’s yesterday? And now we get to add being dragged over the balcony to that heart-stopping list.”

“Well…,” she shrugged her shoulders, “I did end up in your arms each of those times. So my evil plan must be working.”

With an endearing smile, she squeezed his hand and turned for the door. 

“Where are you going?”

“You ordered me to go home. If I leave now I might still catch the 3:30 train. And don’t worry, I’ll try not to get mugged or pushed onto the tracks,” she teased.

“Don’t even joke about that,” he warned with a shake of his head. “Give me a minute,” he instructed, pocketing his wallet and keys. “I’ll drive you home.” 

“See? It's a solid strategy.”

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[theoddcatlady]

My Brothers and Sisters Lived in a Secret Room

Growing up, I knew that my family’s arrangement wasn’t normal. As I got older, I even had an inkling that it might be wrong. But it was all I knew, and I won’t let myself feel guilty for not doing anything about it for as long as I did.

I was the only biological child of my mom and dad, I found albums stacked away in a corner of the attic. The beginnings of baby books. A picture of an ultrasound, sometimes even a happy card announcing ‘It’s a boy!’ or ‘It’s a girl!’ in blue and pink lettering. Mine was the only one who had pictures of a squishy faced infant with tangled red hair and fat lil cheeks.

My first sibling arrived when I was about four. I’d made the horrible mistake of asking Santa for a baby brother when I sat on his lap. My mother burst into tears when she heard me and I knew I’d done something horrible. When we got home, mom told daddy about it and he told me to go play in my room while they talked about it. I knew that it wouldn’t be right to ask Santa for that again.

Next week on Christmas Day though, I woke up to hear a baby cry.

I ran downstairs to the Christmas tree only to find nothing there. I was confused until I heard a cry again. I followed the sound to the basement, where the most beautiful sight met my eyes.

My daddy had built a secret room behind the bookcase. My old toys I’d grown out of were scattered on the floor, the crib repainted to look brand new. My mom sat in the rocking chair, smiling so brightly as she cuddled a baby wrapped in blue blankets.

I couldn’t breathe. It felt like a dream as I walked up to them, peering to look at his face. His face was all red from crying and a fat tear rolled down his cheek as bleary blue eyes looked back at me.

I probably almost cried. My dad came up behind me and planted a kiss on the top of my head.

“Merry Christmas, Ella.”

They let me name him Robin. I can’t tell you why I picked that name, maybe watching Batman cartoons with my dad every Saturday morning had an effect on me. But Robin was the biggest secret I had to keep. I couldn’t tell all my friends at school I had a brother. If I told anyone, my dad told me that Robin would have to go away, and I didn’t want Robin to go away.

Every day after kindergarten I’d sneak downstairs and just talk with him. Once he stopped crying all the time he was a real sweetie. I’d cradle him so carefully and talk to him about my day. I was so, so happy. I didn’t think I could be any more happy.

Until I got a baby sister. My mom named her Caroline, I just called her Carol. Carol had thick dark curls and the softest skin. I loved her just as much as I loved Robin.

I got five more siblings over the years. Robin, Carol, Andrew, Andrea, Ivy, Ronnie, and Isaac. So many cute little babies. Ivy had a bit of a colic and Ronnie constantly had ear infections, but they were all little dears… well, except Isaac.

Isaac was the oddball out of the kids. He was the only little sibling that wasn’t a baby when he arrived. I was about eight when we got him. I remember my dad come back super late and hearing him walking into the basement. His shadow looked like he was carrying something and I felt a spark of joy in my chest. I knew this meant I’d have a new brother or sister come morning.

I went into the basement the moment I woke up, expecting to see my mom feeding my new sibling a bottle or for him to be kicking his lil feet while relaxing in his crib. I was shocked when I walked into the nursery and found a little boy my age, with a gag in his mouth and handcuffed to his bed.

Confused, I walked over and peeled off the gag. “Are you okay?” I asked.

The boy immediately screamed, straining against his handcuff as he attempted to struggle free. Judging by the bruises and bleeding around his wrist, he’d already tried this. Instead of trying to help him up, I tackled him, slapping my hand over his mouth. “Shut up! You’re gonna wake up our brothers and sisters!” I hissed.

My new brother responded by biting my hand. Hard.

I wailed as I ran back upstairs to my parents. My dad went downstairs to deal with my brother while my mom took extra good care to wash clean my hand and bandage it up. She explained that Isaac was troubled. It would take him time to adjust to his new home, I just had to work really hard to be a good sister.

But I was never to undo his handcuff and I was never, ever to let myself get too close. He was dangerous.

I did my best to stay out of arm’s length of Isaac. My dad had to build another room to put him in, one that was below the staircase. He wasn’t safe to keep around the babies.

I did try to befriend Isaac. For that first month or two all he’d do is lunge at me and spit or just scream in my face.

When he did start talking, it was the things I didn’t want to hear.

“My name isn’t Isaac, you know.”

I nearly jumped out of my skin when I heard him speak that first time. He was quiet that day, only giving me a sullen glare. I’d decided to leave when he finally spoke up, his voice raspy from all the screaming he did.

“It’s Kevin.” He turned around to face me. “I want my real mom and dad.”

I shook my head. “But my mom and dad are now yours too,” I said. I was such a selfless child, I figured, being so willing to share my parents.

Isaac just shook his head. “No. I don’t want them. I want mine. Your dad came into my bedroom and stole me.”

“You’re a liar.” I stuck my tongue out at him. “I hate you.”

Isaac shrugged. “Just ask him. I bet he killed my mommy and daddy so they wouldn’t look for me, either,” He said.

I stormed out, slamming his door a bit hard. But what Isaac said got to me. I couldn’t stop thinking about it, even when my dad came to tuck me in and kiss me goodnight. I even almost asked him. But I couldn’t make myself face the truth.

I barely got any sleep for a week. Every time I closed my eyes all I saw was Isaac, all alone under the stairs. Thinking about his real mom and dad.

I still didn’t do anything until I overheard my mom and dad talking about getting rid of Isaac.

It was late, probably close to midnight. I still couldn’t sleep so I was going to my parent’s room to ask for something to drink when I heard them talking.

“I told you, Isaac is too old. He’s too far gone. We can’t help him,” I heard my mom.

“Give it some more time, we can still help him!” My dad sounded so desperate, so… so sad.

“I’m sorry. But this was your rule, and breaking it was never going to end well. I’ll… I’ll take care of it myself tomorrow. Take Ella out while I handle Isaac. We’ll just tell her he ran away.”

Even at my young age I knew something really bad was going to happen to Isaac. And even if I hated him, I couldn’t let that happen.

I found the key to the handcuffs, ran into the basement and ripped open the door. Isaac, no, Kevin jolted up in bed. “What’s wrong?” He asked.

I didn’t say anything, I just slid the key into the lock and freed him. Kevin gaped as he pulled his hand free. “… But why?” He asked.

“We need to go to the cops. Come on, hurry!”

I took Kevin’s hand and we snuck out the back. I held onto his hand when we ran down the street, and I kept holding on when we finally came across a cop car. Of course, seeing these tiny tykes at that time of night got his attention.

I told him everything. About the children behind the bookcase, what I heard my mother plotting. All of it.

My life was turned upside down after that. All these children my parents had taken. Just little babies that were taken from their cribs in the middle of the night, the parents awaking to find their child was gone.

Kevin was right, he was the only one whose parents had been killed. Their throats had been cut open. My dad claimed that by the time he’d gotten there Kevin’s parents were already dead, but that really didn’t hold up in court. My mom swallowed a bottle of pills before she could be tried and my dad was sentenced to life in prison.

The last time I saw him, he just patted my shoulder and told me it wasn’t my fault how this all turned out.

He hung himself that night in his jail cell.

Now I was an orphan just like Kevin.

I went into the system, which was just as shitty as it sounds. I’ve literally done everything from sleeping on the floor to showering with my clothes on because I didn’t feel safe. I bounced from house to house until a great aunt crawled out of the woodwork to save me. She really didn’t do much other than clothe and feed me but that’s all I needed. By then I was fourteen, I could basically take care of myself.

The last thing she did for me was make sure I got my childhood home back. I know it’s fucked up, considering what went down there, but my heart ached whenever I passed it. No one ever bought it. The yard was unkempt, windows gathered dust and paint began to peel. But my aunt, penny pincher that she was her whole life, had saved enough to give me all I needed to scoop it off the market.

I’ve spent the last month cleaning up the place. It’s actually starting to look like a home, and it was only two nights ago that I stumbled across those old albums I told you about.

There was another one though, for all the kids my parents abducted. It was hidden behind a fake panel in the wall, I only found it because I accidentally kicked the damn thing. I contemplated just leaving it there. A part of my past I didn’t need to dig up.

But I went through it anyway… and there was so much I actually didn’t remember.

I didn’t remember that Robin’s eyes glowed ultraviolet in the dark. I didn’t remember that Andrew and Andrea never slept. I didn’t remember how Carol sprouted a mouth full of needle like teeth and had leathery wings jutting from her back. I didn’t remember that Ivy had patches of pale blue scales breaking up her otherwise dark skin. I didn’t remember that Ronnie’s ears came to a slender point and that he had a second set of near transparent eyelids. Kevin seemed normal, maybe, but now I’m not so sure. When I think of his hands, I remember how each fingertip ended in a sharp, bone claw.

I’ve not slept since then. I’ve stayed up to research those kids, my little brothers and sisters. In the news footage they looked normal enough… almost. If you squint you could almost see Ivy’s scales or Ronnie’s ears not looking right. But then you blink and they just look like normal little kids.

I’ve dug up their fates. They all went back to their families. But all their families are now all dead and have been for a while. Ivy’s family drowned, that much I confirmed. I think Ronnie’s dad just never woke up. The others I’m still researching.

And Kevin? His foster parents had their throats cut out one night. He’s never been seen since.

[daisynik7]

A Stitch Ahead

Pairing: Mitsuya x Original Female Character

Rating: Mature

Word Count: ~4.4k

cw: explicit language, switching POVs (2nd and 3rd person)

Summary: Mitsuya is asked to create jackets for the newly appointed captains, to which he reluctantly agrees. When the deadline arrives and he still hasn’t finished, he enlists your aid to help him complete his task. The same day, the two of you make dinner together for his sisters, leaving Mitsuya with a lasting impression.

Author's Note: I hope you enjoy this chapter! Thanks so much for all those who have read this so far, I truly appreciate all the support on this little series! It may take me a while to put out chapters since I am simultaneously working on requests for my event, so I appreciate your patience with this! Likes, reblogs, and/or comments are always appreciated! Would love to hear what you think so far! 

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The next three weeks go smoothly for Mitsuya. He’s continuing to do well in his classes, and he manages to keep up with his sewing projects. Fridays, he meets with Shimizu after school until dinnertime, then he drops her off to his house to watch his sisters for the night while he hangs out with his friends. He can’t remember the last time he had spare time like this, even if it is only for a few hours a night. Since the beginning of this arrangement, he’s been able to catch up with Draken, Takemitchy, Hakkai and his little sister, Yuhuza. With everyone busy with their own priorities, it’s nice to reconnect. Mikey remains to be seen. 

A month after Hanma and Kisaki are appointed captains, Mitsuya is tasked to make new jackets for them. He holds the phone to his ear, glaring at his shoes with Draken’s voice ringing in his ears. “Just do it, Mitsuya. Mikey’s orders.” 

“But for those two assholes?” he questions, kicking a pebble on the ground. He stands outside one of the courtyards at school, on his lunch break. Naturally, he’s reluctant to concede to this request, considering how pissed off he still is by the two traitors. The memory is fresh in his mind, fighting Taiju, head of The Black Dragons and Hakkai’s older brother, in the chapel on Christmas Day. Mitsuya probably wouldn’t have been whacked in the skull by a metal pipe if Kisaki and Hanma didn’t betray the plan that Takemitchy devised. And while he’s dealt with his dose of treason, like with Peh-Yan attacking Draken in retaliation for Pah-Chin’s arrest, he managed to forgive, forget, and move on. Though something about those two rub him the wrong way. 

That being said, Mitsuya trusts Mikey. He’s never been one to question their leader’s decisions, always complying to whatever he suggests. So, he agrees, especially when Draken reiterates, “Mikey’s orders. I’m not going to repeat myself. Make the damn jackets.”

“Fine,” he relents. Maybe he’ll hide a few loose threads in there to be spiteful. 

“By the way, we won’t be able to host dinner Friday. Emma and I are going to her grandpa’s, so I’ll meet you at the shrine.”

“Okay, sounds good. Maybe I’ll see if Takemitchy wants to hang out.”

“Probably not. Him and Hina are going out for a date night or whatever. I overheard Emma talking to her the other day.”

He sighs, leaning his head against the wall of the building. “I guess I can eat with my sisters then.”

“Doesn’t your classmate watch them on Fridays? Maybe she can cook for you.” There’s a boisterous drilling sound in the background on Draken’s end, and Mitsuya is reminded that he’s talking to him during work hours at the car shop.  

A little louder, he replies, “Yeah, maybe.”

“You never told me, but is she hot?” Draken asks, his cocky smirk audible through all the noise. 

“Don’t you have a pregnant girlfriend at home?”

“It’s not for me, asshole. It’s for you. When’s the last time you hooked up? And sneaking Jasmine into your house doesn’t count.”

“I thought we agreed to never mention that again,” He blushes over the memory that occurred a year ago. He was set up on a date with one of Emma’s friends, and it was going fine up until his mom called him to come home and watch his sisters because of a last-minute scheduling change. Not wanting to waste the opportunity to get some much-needed action, he brought her home with him, making Luna and Mana swear not to snitch. Either way, it didn’t lead to much since the mood was killed; turns out, Jasmine isn’t a fan of children, so even his very adorable sisters turned her off completely. 

“Sorry, it slipped,” Draken laughs. “My point is it sounds like this girl has been helping you out recently. Maybe she can help you with something else if you catch my drift.”

He shakes his head at this ridiculous conversation, unsure why he’s entertaining it to begin with. “I don’t think of her in that way. She’s really sweet, sure. But we’re just classmates.”

“Is she ugly?”

“No! She’s not ugly at all. She’s actually kind of cute,” he trails off, picturing Shimizu’s warm smile and kind eyes, gazing at him carefully, always in awe of his sewing abilities during their lessons inside the home economics room. It makes him feel special, like what he’s saying means something, even if it is just instructions on how to stitch a new patch or mend a tear. 

“Have you made a move yet?”

“I’m not going to make a move on her.”

“Why not?”

Mitsuya is getting annoyed by his friend’s persistence. “It’s not like that. I’m teaching her to sew, and she’s helping me watch the girls. That’s it. Anyways, I gotta go.” He has a few more minutes until his next class, but he’d rather not prolong this discussion any further. 

“I’ll ask Emma if she has any more friends to set you up with. Not Jasmine of course – ” He hangs up before hearing the rest of Draken’s sentence.  

Friday arrives, and with homework piling on, Mitsuya realizes that he’s behind on schedule. Tonight is another Toman meeting; afterwards, the captains will get together at a local diner to discuss more important matters. There, Mikey will present Hanma and Kisaki their new jackets. That is, if Mitsuya can finish them. Immediately after class, he rushes to the home economics room, resuming where he left off on Hanma’s. He hasn’t touched Kisaki’s yet. It’s not difficult for him; the problem is, he needs more time, or maybe an extra set of hands. 

“Hey, Mitsuya.” Shimizu’s voice is soft behind him. He turns to face her, realizing this is the blessing he needs today. 

“Shimizu!” he greets, more enthusiastic than usual. 

She giggles, clearly surprised by the energetic reaction. “Are you okay?”

There’s an odd pang in his chest hearing her laugh. He ignores it, swiveling in his seat to display the jacket to her. “I’m actually in a pinch right now, and I think you can help me out. If you’re willing.” She sits beside him, studying the clothing, waiting for him to elaborate. 

“I’m trying to finish the rest of these by tonight, but I don’t have time unless I get your help. There’s another jacket in my bag,” he points to his backpack resting on top of one of the desks. “I haven’t touched it at all. I was hoping maybe you can finish the one I started while I work on the other.” They’ve had lessons each week for the past month, so he’s confident that she knows the basics enough to complete his work. It also helps that these are for people he doesn’t like, so if it’s a sloppy, he won’t mind. 

She hesitates, staring at the garment in his hands. “Are you sure I can do this?”

He smiles, passing it to her. “Absolutely. It’ll be good practice. It doesn’t have to be perfect.”

She takes it, eyeing it nervously, nodding to herself for reassurance. “Okay, where should I start?”

~~~

At first glance, it seems more advanced than your current skill level. After all, you’ve only had four lessons with Mitsuya without doing anything on your own. With his low, gentle voice guiding you through it, you find yourself weaving through the fabric easily, with only a few sloppy stitches here and there. 

“Oh, shoot,” you mutter, leaning towards him to show him your blunder. “I left a big gap there.”

He waves it off. “Barely noticeable. Besides, we don’t like the guy this jacket is going to, so it’s okay.”

You raise a brow at him, curious. “We?”

“Well, me and a few of my friends. This guy is a total asshole.”

You brush your fingers along the embroidered characters stitched on the back of the jacket, mouthing the name it spells out. Tokyo Manji Gang. Without thinking, you blurt out, “Is it scary?”

“Is what scary?” he asks, not looking up from his work. 

Deciding it’s too late to back down, you add, “Being in a gang.”

He pauses this time, still focused on the fabric, contemplating his answer. After a beat, he says, “Sometimes. I don’t like fighting unless I have to.”

“When do you have to?” You’re not sure how much you’re crossing the line, but your curiosity gets the best of you.

“When I have to protect someone I care about.” He glances at you with a small smile on his face. “I’m actually a pacifist.”

You grin at him, nudging his knee with yours. “A pacifist in a gang. How ironic.”

“Hey, we don’t fight all the time! We mostly ride our bikes and have fun.” He keeps himself near you, bare skin of your knee poking out from your skirt brushing against his pant leg. It’s not uncomfortable; in fact, you relish the delicate touch. “We’re not as scary as everyone thinks we are.”

“I’m beginning to realize that.” Heat rushes into your cheeks, suddenly aware of the intimacy in this moment. You draw your leg back, pretending to focus on the jacket again. “Anyways, hopefully your friend won’t notice this.”

“He won’t. Like I said, it’s barely noticeable. And besides, he’s not my friend.”

You don’t mention it any further, too shy to pry him for more details, chalking it up to gang matters that you shouldn’t involve yourself with. After an hour more of idle chitchat and stitching, your jacket is complete, while Mitsuya’s is more than halfway finished. When it’s time for them to head home for dinner and babysitting duties, he stuffs both garments into his bag, grabbing his helmet from the cupboard. “Ready? I can finish the rest at home before my meeting.”

You nod, cradling the helmet he gave you weeks ago. There’s a sticker you placed on it the other day, one of a cartoon hamburger with a winky face. Turning it to show him, you say, “I hope you don’t mind.”

He smiles, leaning in closer to inspect it. “Not at all. I’m glad you’re customizing it. It’s yours now, anyways.” His eyes twinkle at you, genuinely meaning the kind words he’s saying. It’s enough to put a flutter in your belly.

You’ve gotten used to riding with him now. Adrenaline courses through your veins whenever he’s cruising through the streets, but you’re more relaxed with your arms around him, holding him snug for stability. Despite his intimidating status as a gang member, he’s done nothing to put you in danger. In fact, Mitsuya makes you feel safe, and you admire him for that. 

Admiration. That’s all it is. Right? 

You’re happily greeted by Mana and Luna at the door, who watch you slip out of your shoes, immediately grabbing you once you’re done to lead you into their bedroom. “Let’s play dress up!”

“Hey girls, let her breathe. We just got here.”

“We want to model the new costumes you made for us!” Mana whines, stomping her feet. 

Realization hits you. “Oh! Those are the ones you were showing me the other week, right?”

He rubs the nape of his neck, embarrassed. “Yeah, I finally finished them.”

“Let’s go!” Luna exclaims, dragging you further down the hallway. 

Mitsuya follows behind, laughing. “Guess you’re their plaything now.”

“I guess so.” They pull you into their room, Luna shutting the door ajar, enough to peek at her brother through the crack.

“I’m going to finish my work if you need me,” he mentions through the small opening. “Please don’t let them torture you for too long.”

“Hey! This is fun! Now shoo!” the older of the two sisters demands, waving him off. “Girls only!” You can hear him chuckle as he walks away into the living room. 

They try on their new outfits, courtesy of their big brother, twirling in their dresses, skirts poofy and sparkly with glittery fabric. Mitsuya did an amazing job with these; he had mentioned before that this is for an upcoming princess-themed party his sisters are planning to attend. They complete their ensemble with plastic tiaras sitting pretty on their heads. You play with them for a while, acting like a wicked witch bent on stealing their precious crowns for whatever reason. Eventually, he returns, pushing the door slightly open to ask, “Are you ladies hungry?”

His sisters jump up, arms flailing in the air. “Yes!” they exclaim, pulling you up from the bed, leading you out of their room and back into the kitchen. 

“Did you finish the jacket?” 

“Yup!” he answers, giving you a thumbs up.

“And you’re not eating with your friends tonight?” You try not to sound excited.

“Nah, they’re busy, so I’ve got some time.”

You smile to yourself, secretly elated to have this opportunity to spend more time with him. You’ve been curious about where he sneaks off to before his big Friday night meetings. He’s mentioned names like Draken and Takemitchy, and you have no context on who these people are. His sisters seem to be familiar with his friends, but you’re embarrassed to ask them about it, not wanting to come off nosy. You want to learn more about his life, about him. 

“Can we please have fancy ramen tonight?” Mana peers up at you with puppy-dog eyes, making it impossible to refuse. 

“Don’t feel pressured to do this,” Mitsuya tells you, shooting a glare at his sister. “Mana, it’s rude to make demands like that.”

“I said please!” she whines. 

You open the pantry to retrieve the proper ingredients. “I really don’t mind. It’s easy and nothing special.”

He stands next to you, grinning. “It is, though. My sisters won’t stop raving about it.”

“You should teach Taka how to make it!” Luna suggests, retrieving paper and crayons so they can draw while you cook. 

“Yeah, I’ve been wanting to learn. Show me your ways, Master,” he teases, bowing to you. 

Chuckling, you pass him the can of Spam. “I guess the roles are reversed this time.”

“There’s a lot we can both learn from each other, don’t you agree?” He cracks it open, tapping it out onto a cutting board. “So, how should I cut this?”

He dices the meat into bite-sized pieces, per your instructions, then pours it onto a pan to crisp the edges. Meanwhile, you slice the green onions and place the eggs in a pot of boiling water, explaining exactly how you get them to be perfectly soft-boiled. It’s nothing extraordinary, like you told him earlier, but he watches you carefully, nodding along as if he’s retaining every single detail in his head. That’s what you admire about him. He treats something so simple, so ordinary, as if it’s special.  

When your timer sets off, you place the eggs into an ice bath, letting them chill for a few minutes before peeling them. Mitsuya remains beside you, hovering over the pot with the noodles and broth simmering. “Already smells amazing, can’t wait to eat this. I’ve been craving ramen for a while now.”

You decide to pose the question that’s been on your mind, hoping it comes off nonchalant. “What do you usually eat on Friday nights?” 

“Draken’s been cooking recently, so it’s whatever his girlfriend is in the mood for that day. Last week it was chicken katsu.” he answers, stirring the soup. He turns the dial, shutting off the burner. “I think it’s done.”

You arrange all your cooked and prepped ingredients on the countertop, passing him a bowl. “Is Draken also part of your gang?”

He pours broth into it, carefully handing it to you. “Yeah, but we go way back before Toman. We’ve been friends since we were kids. We even have matching tattoos.”

“Tattoos?” 

“Yeah. Want to see?” He runs his fingers through the hair on the right side of his head, showing off the ink etched on his scalp. “It’s hard to see with my hair in the way, but it’s a dragon tattoo. Draken caught me spray painting this on a wall when we were kids. He offered his beef bento in exchange for it. A month later, we saw each other again and we both happened to get the same tattoo without either of us knowing. We’ve been the Twin Dragons ever since.” 

You garnish the assembled ramen with green onions and a sprinkle of sesame seeds. “That’s amazing. I can’t believe you designed that, too. There’s nothing you can’t do.”

“It’s a dragon. Nothing special, really.” He scratches the back of his neck, blushing. 

You set the food down in front of Luna, who thanks you happily, waiting for it to cool down. “It is, though,” you say, repeating his comment from earlier. “And the story behind it is special too. Draken seems like a good friend.”

“He is. He’s a great guy.” He starts on the second, adding, “And he’s going to be dad soon. His girlfriend is pregnant.”

“Wow! That’s exciting, congratulations to them.”

He chuckles, on the third now as you finish the second and present it to Mana, who claps. “Yeah. I still can’t believe it. They’re going to have a little baby in this crazy world.” He trails off, a sudden shift in his demeanor, almost like he’s sad. 

“Aren’t you happy for them?”

“Of course I am. I just…I don’t know. Draken’s had a rough life, ever since he was a kid. A couple years ago, he went into cardiac arrest after being stabbed almost to death. He finally has a chance at a normal life, and I don’t want to see him lose that. Part of me believes leaving Toman is his best bet to prevent that from happening.”

You empty whatever is left into both bowls for you and Mitsuya. With all the dishes in the sink and the two sisters already slurping on their noodles, you slide him his serving. “Would you ever leave?”

He doesn’t answer right away, contemplating your question. “I don’t think I have a good enough reason to.”

You’re tempted to keep this conversation going, but you start feeling guilty for prying so much into his life. A life that you’ll never understand, no matter how hard you try. So instead, you ask, “Ready to eat?”

He nods, smiling at his ramen. “Definitely.”

You join the two girls around the table, rubbing your palms together, excited to dive in. Luna and Mana are already halfway through their food, lips glossy with the broth they’ve been slurping. Mitsuya takes a big bite, eyes lighting up once it hits his tongue. “Wow!”

“It’s good, right Taka?”

“Open your egg! Open your egg!” Mana demands, excited to see it. 

He grins at his sisters, holding it out to show them the perfectly runny yolk dripping from the spoon into the soup, resulting in a round of applause. He faces you, expression warm and bright. “We make a good team, don’t we?”

Your chest swells with pride, and an odd sensation you’re unfamiliar with. All you can do is nod, smiling back at him, focusing on your meal to ignore the heat creeping into your cheeks and the flutters twisting in your belly. 

~~~

The four bowls on the table are licked completely clean, not a trace of meat or garnish left. Mitsuya checks his phone for the first time in what seems like a while, too busy enjoying the moment with his sisters and Shimizu, sharing childhood stories about the shenanigans they all got up to as siblings. When he sees that it’s almost nine, he curses, causing Luna and Mana to scold him, “Taka! No swearing!”

“I need to go. I’m going to be late.” He looks at Shimizu, guilty that he’s leaving her to clean the mess they made in the kitchen. “I’m so sorry. Leave it and I’ll get to it later tonight. I promise.”

“It’s fine,” she reassures him. “It’s just a few dishes. Don’t worry about it.”

“Thank you, Shimizu. Seriously. This was really great.” Before he dawdles even longer, he puts on his Toman uniform, grabbing his backpack with the two jackets they finished earlier. He sprints out the door, hopping onto his bike to speed his way to the Shrine.

Draken sits on the steps, greeting him with a smirk. “You’re late. Lucky for you, so is Mikey.”

“Sorry. I got caught up with something,” Mitsuya explains, wiping sweat off his forehead.

The two of them head up the stairs, chatting idly with the others until Mikey finally shows up, beginning the meeting. There’s plenty of topics that are discussed, including Kisaki’s and Hanma’s efforts to infiltrate the rival Leviathan gang. However, Mitsuya is only half paying attention; his mind keeps going back to the dinner he had with his sisters and Shimizu. 

He doesn’t remember the last time he hung out with someone that wasn’t his family or a member of Toman. In fact, he doesn’t have any friends outside of that. For the first time, Mitsuya felt like himself. Not big brother Taka or Second Division Captain of the Tokyo Manji Gang. He was Takashi Mitsuya, eighteen-year-old student who sews, occasionally cooks, enjoys eating, and happens to be in a gang. 

Admitting his fear about Draken was a huge weight off his shoulders. He’s thankful to his new friend for giving him the outlet to confess what he could never to anyone else. Would anyone else understand him? Is he the only one who has these hints of doubts about the future? Mitsuya has never considered a future outside of Toman. He figured he’d grow old wearing the jacket or die protecting it, whichever comes first. Could he have a life outside of the gang? Sure, he’s dreamt of it before. Pursuing a career as a designer. Watching his sisters grow up into independent, strong women. His mom marrying a nice man who would give her the life she deserves. And maybe, just maybe, he could follow in Draken’s footsteps and create a little family of his own with someone he loves. 

It's a possible future for his sisters and mother. There’s nothing stopping them from that. But for him? Could he ever leave the gang behind? Does he want to do that? Toman is also his family. How could he turn his back on his brothers?

He snaps out of his reverie when the meeting is over and Draken pats him on the shoulder. “Man, what’s with you today? Your head is in the clouds.”

Mitsuya punches his arm lightly. “Just tired, I guess.”

“Oh right, Hanma’s and Kisaki’s jackets. I’m assuming you finished?”

“I did, thanks to Shimizu,” he replies, smiling. 

“Ah, so she has a name,” he teases, nudging him as they walk down towards their bikes. “And now she’s helping you sew. What else can she do for you?”

“I told you, it’s not like that. She’s a good person, so don’t talk about her like that.” He shrugs his friend off, oddly defensive.

Draken cackles. “Oh shit, my bad. I didn’t mean to offend your woman.”

Before he can give him a harder punch, Hanma sneaks up on them, voice as sleazy as it usually is. “What’s this? Little Taka has a woman?”

Mitsuya does his best to ignore him, actually upset now that this asshole is butting into their private conversation. If only Draken didn’t have such a big mouth.

“C’mon, don’t be shy. Tell us all about her,” he says, a creepy smirk on his lips. 

Draken interferes, stepping between them. “I was teasing him. It’s nothing.” 

Hanma shrugs, hands in his pockets. “Fine. Keep your little secrets. I guess I’ll just have to find out who Shimizu is myself.” He laughs, walking away as Mitsuya and Draken slow their pace, staring at him, concerned.

~~~

It’s almost midnight when you’re awoken by the sound of keys jingling at the front door. You fell asleep on the couch after putting the girls to bed about an hour ago, watching a familiar show on the lowest volume with all the lights off. You rouse awake, sitting up to meet Mitsuya’s gaze as he stands by the couch, waving at you. “Hey. Ready to go home?” Minutes later, still not fully awake, you’re riding behind him on his motorbike, clinging to his waist. He remains quiet; he must be tired from his meeting. 

He pulls up to your driveway, stopping the ignition so you can hop off. “Thank you for the ride,” you say, pulling the helmet off your head. “And thank you for helping me cook. That was fun.”

He nods, eyes averted towards the ground. “Yeah, it was.”

With nothing else to comment, you turn on your heel to head inside. Before you can, you feel him grip your wrist gently, his touch radiating up your arms and throughout your entire body. 

“Shimizu.” His voice is soft; you like the way your name sounds coming from his mouth, maybe a little too much. 

“Yes?”

He opens his mouth, then closes it again, struggling for the right words. Eventually, he utters, “Have a good night.” 

He lets go, starting the engine, leaving you to stand in the driveway, alone and confused.  

[tennessoui]

for the prompt

“You always this quiet?”

for KUWKS? ♥️♥️♥️ love you

hello !! and welcome to the return of KUWSK! this is more of a teasing 1k because i think i'm going to try and put this ficlet as an expanded chapter up on ao3 soon! this takes place a few weeks after chapter 9, the ficlet where they get engaged

(1k)

(Early December, Five Years, a Few Months, and a Few Weeks after the Skywalkers Move In)

There is a very loud bang, followed by a very loud crash. Anakin stirs awake with a grumble, comforted only by the fact that he can hear his fiancé do the same on the other side of the bed.

“Your turn,” he mutters, turning over onto his side.

“S not,” Obi-Wan replies, and the mattress shifts slightly as he turns over himself—conveniently taking half the covers back and winding them around his own body as if it’s not late December and fucking frigid. “Yours.”

Anakin swats at him ineffectively, barely grazing his back. His eyes slit open to read the blurry digital number of the alarm clock on his nightstand. It’s five in the morning. “Get up,” he mumbles, reaching back again to push at his fiancé. “Investigate.”

“I cannae find my glasses,” the asshole says, even though Anakin knows he hasn’t even tried to look for them. “‘M blind without them, you know that.”

There’s another loud sound. Something has definitely fallen. It’s December 17th, much too early for Santa. “What if it’s your father arriving early for Christmas?” Anakin asks, rubbing his face against his pillow. “You know if I have to talk with your father before at least three cups of coffee, it’s going to end in tears.”

“Don’t care,” Obi-Wan murmurs, shifting more. He’s probably curling into a nice little ball of sleepy warmth right now, the fucker. “Go make nice with your father in law.”

“Not married yet,” Anakin reminds him. “‘S your turn to make nice with him.”

“Mm,” his fiancé says, which could mean anything. “But what if it’s a home intruder?”

“Your house,” Anakin points out, trying to steal back some of the covers. He’s starting to shiver. “‘Sides you have all those scary looking tattoos. Intimidating.”

“Mm,” his favorite bastard says. “But you fucked me so well last night that I couldn’t possibly walk, let alone defend the castle.” The word castle is split in two by a yawn. “Wouldn’t be very intimidating to a burglar if I can’t walk without a limp, he’d laugh me out of house and home.”

Anakin kicks at him, but the older man doesn’t even acknowledge his act of almost-marital abuse. He’s quite sure they’re both fully awake at this point, which makes him want to push Obi-Wan out of bed because it’s his fucking turn and it’s very cold and he’s stolen all the blankets.

As if somehow sensing exactly how close Anakin is to unspeakable violence, Obi-Wan rolls over and ghosts a hand down his back before allowing his fingers to simply rest against his spine. “Anakin love,” Obi-Wan mumbles, inching forward until he’s pressed against Anakin’s back. “Won’t you go make sure no one has broken into our house or hurt our children? I would, but you’ve rendered me so terribly incapable of walking after we made love last night.”

Anakin is going to marry an absolute dick. He pushes himself up into a sitting position and glares over his shoulder at his asshole of a fiancé. “That’s not always going to work, you know,” Anakin says waspishly as he forces himself to swing his legs off the mattress, glaring over his shoulder.

Obi-Wan’s eyes are closed as he stretches out more into the warmth of the bed, a sleepy, self-satisfied smile curling the edges of his lips.

“See if I let you bottom next time,” Anakin mutters as he pulls on a pair of joggers over his briefs. No need to give either a potential burglar or Qui-Gon Jinn an accidental eye full.

“Mm,” Obi-Wan says, rolling into Anakin’s warm spot like a goddamn cat that got the fucking cream. “I look forward to it.”

Anakin grumbles and keeps grumbling, especially when he hits his shin on his bedside table trying to find his shoes.

Obi-Wan shushes him and turns over.

“I’m going to murder you if the burglar doesn’t get to it first,” Anakin hisses in a low voice. 

Obi-Wan begins to snore.

Of all the assholes in the world, Anakin had to go and fall in love with the smarmiest, which is really just his luck.

But he is in love with him, so he tries to be quiet as he exits the bedroom and crosses the long hall from the master bedroom to the living room. 

There’s light spilling out from the kitchen into the dining room, casting flickering shadows on the back of the couch.

Two very, very familiar voices echo through the empty space now that the bedroom door isn’t blocking the noise. Anakin pinches the bridge of his nose and counts to ten. He’d almost have preferred Obi-Wan’s father. At least he can yell at Qui-Gon Jinn without feeling bad.

He rounds the couch and walks through the empty dining room, suddenly incredibly grateful he’d put on joggers.

In the artificial light of the kitchen mixed with the pre-dawn light, his children are fighting over a metal bowl filled almost to the brim with some sort of sticky, white, amorphous blob monster in early stages of propagation. 

“Give it,” Leia snaps, fingers curling into the mixture itself. “You’re too short!”

“You’re just as short!” Luke snarls back, face red and covered with flour. “Stop it!”

“You stop it!”

“No! It was my idea!”

“No, it wasn’t!”

“Yes it was!”

The metal mixing bowl clangs against the wooden cabinet as the twins swing it around. 

Anakin leans against the doorway of the kitchen and observes his little angels in their natural habitat.

“Luke! Let go!” Leia cries, and Luke shouts back, wordless with rage.

“So,” Anakin says in his sternest voice, even as he remains leant against the doorway, ankles crossed. At the sound of his voice, both little faces whip towards him, expressions frozen in guilty terror. A bit of sarcasm slips into his tone, though he’s sure it goes over his nine year olds’ heads. He cocks his eyebrow just like Obi-Wan does. “You always this quiet?” 

[purplerose244]

Winners

Hi @master-of-reblog! I was your secret santa for this year, this is my present for you! Merry Christmas! 🎅🎅🎅

Thanks @kokosnuss-jaguar for organizing the event once again! 😍

It is a little fic based on an AU, basically Lloyd ends up at Kai and Nya's door when little and he grows up to be their brother (this implies him not knowing who his dad is, Wu keeps it a secret because of freaking course and Garmadon does to in order to give him a peaceful existence). I love this trio's bond so much, I was so glad to see you like them as well! 💚💙💓

Well then, enjoy!

Nya could barely take this. Seeing this little tornado of a kid lightening up at the decorations of the fair, his cheeks still red from the cold and the eyes filled with stars, she genuinely thought she was going to collapse. It was almost unsettling how quickly he changed attitude the moment they arrived, to the point she wondered if this was the first time he had ever been to this kind of place.

Who could have known, given that for what they knew Lloyd was an orphan?

“Look at the little menace showing some sort of humanity.” Kai looked irritated, but Nya could see the tenderness in his eyebrows. “So much for the theory of being the spawn of a demon.”

“Kai!”

“You can’t tell me that wouldn’t have explained it!” There he was again. Perhaps putting up crazy theories about Lloyd’s origins helped him cope with their unstable situation. “He has red eyes, he’s insanely loud when he complains, and have you seen what he did to my comic books?!”

Nya snickered – who needed school when you could make collages at home?

“You mean what we did…”

Kai gasped so loud he almost caught Lloyd’s attention – almost, there were candies over there.

“You traitor! How dare you side with the enemy brother??” He rubbed her head strongly, making her laugh again. This hothead could pretend he didn’t like Lloyd as much as he wanted, he was the one that started calling him ‘brother’ first. “I won’t let this betrayal distract me, though! With the winter fair of Ignacia coming along, there is only one place worthy of my attention!” Kai marched forward, taking Lloyd’s hand out of reflex the moment the blondie looked ready to jump on the candy booth. “And it is… right here!”

From how run-down this stand was, it really stood out in comparison with the colorful and sophisticated booths all around.

It was probably the oldest looking shooting gallery to ever exist, one Nya remembered being there… since mom and dad were there. When they came to the fair for the first time since they disappeared, she broke down in tears. It was easier this time, even if not painless.

The same old man was waiting for them, grinning from one ear to the other when he recognized the same foolish kid with spiky hair proudly walking his way.

“The Smiths! What a surprise!” Sure, what a surprise seeing the same kid on the same day of every year. “Oh, and you got another one now?” He looked at Lloyd, who immediately hid behind Nya – cute cute cute cute. “Well then, here to try your skills once more, boy?”

“You bet! And this time, that thing is coming home with me!” He pointed at the biggest teddy bear of the stand, almost as tall as Lloyd. That had been the goal for as long as either of them could remember, perhaps from when she was born. “Mrs. Grumbmiller finally gave us allowance for today, I am ready to try until I die!” Somehow it always seemed likely and unlikely with Kai.

Indeed, that mean lady had finally decided that they were real kids that needed to do real things, although it was possible she gave up out of exhaustion after the latest prank week – to say that Lloyd had been a wonderful addition was an understatement.

The old man grinned again that massive curve, providing the little red balls to hit the piles of cups. Kai took one, aiming with confidence, and threw it.

Missed by a mile.

“Ah, so close!” So, it began. Nya was young but not too much to not realize the kind of scam shooting galleries were, especially with a clearly very mischievous owner of the booth. “It brushed it! I saw it!” With that being said, the scam made sense only when the person was close to hitting the target. It was genuinely embarrassing seeing her brother basically aiming at the stand of donuts behind. “No! Come on! Alright, give me three more!” To his credit, he never accused the game or something other than his skills. To his discredit, man he was bad at this.

Nya sighed, looking around for the daily distraction while her brother made a fool of himself. He was so adamant at winning that thing, she really didn’t understand why he was so fixated. She blamed his ego and how much he wanted that boost, but at least he was too busy to check on her while she tried something cute from the stand – big brother energy was massive in those times.

Before she could even move, Lloyd pulled her skirt to get her attention. His big eyes were batting innocently, in contrast with those unsettling red orbs.

“Kai winner?”

Nya snickered.

“I don’t think so, buddy.”

“Then why Kai try?”

She wanted to poke fun on the matter, to her own amusement and to see Lloyd broke down in adorable giggles, but her eyes were still on her brother. His eyes were fixed, his smile radiant, as he almost hit someone passing by. Despite their family falling apart, he was still the same.

She smiled, half-hugging Lloyd, deciding she could watch this massacre for a bit longer.

“He’s just Kai, you’ll realize it soon enough.”

***

Déjà-vu.

It had been years since they had been together at the fair. Since then, their family had expanded quite a lot, his brother was now a ninja and his sister a samurai. Even so, when Lloyd stepped onto the fields of Ignacia for the local winter fair, he felt it extremely familiar.

Especially for the way Kai was aiming at the gallery once again.

“How about we do something else?” Nya, the ever so rational, pointed at a long line of booths with ornaments. “To change the routine, you know?”

“Nope, this is a mission.”

“Not even the blacksmith booth? We can poke fun at easy mistakes!”

“Tempting, but no. This is the year.” Kai raised his fist to the sky, as to make a statement of some sort. To think that this guy had defeated an evil warlord and was on its way to take care of a population of snake-like people… “This time, I will get the price I’ve been longing for! I’ve been trained so hard for this, I will not let destiny dictate his actions!” This had to be the effect of being a part of a team of hero. Speeches.

Lloyd didn’t necessarily mind this novelty, the other guys were fun, especially to prank. When Nya was taken by Lord Garmadon he didn’t think this was going to be the outcome once Kai came back from the rescue mission, but having more brothers was cool. It was cool.

Although, in all of this, the blonde was kind of… there.

Nya gave him a soft elbow, grinning.

“Do you think he’s gonna realize that the game is rigged this time?”

Lloyd smiled back.

“I think he should be able to hit the target now, so maybe? I wonder if he’ll give up once the jig is up.” They both new, in their hearts, it was not likely. Lloyd looked at the ground, his tiny legs almost tripping on a little stone. “Nya?” His sister hummed. “It’s been a while and I grew up a few inches since last time, you know…” She was already furrowing her eyebrows, but he ignored it and continued. “Can I also have a mech suit??” He closed his eyes and opened them in the best puppy eyes he could muster.

His sister gave him a stone-cold glare. She used to swoon all the time, but with the years she realized when he used his powers for bad or good. This time was bad, from her point of view.

“You’re not putting yourself in danger like that!”

“But Nya! There are serpentines all over the place! I need protection!”

“Then get to training! Ask sensei Wu, I’m sure he would be happy to train you!” Lloyd couldn’t hold back a shiver, Nya let out a snort. “You really don’t like him, do you? He’s really kind and wise, you know? You only have to learn from him.”

It was true and, ideally, Lloyd knew he could have trained with a master of martial arts whenever he wanted to. Yet he couldn’t bring himself to, Wu had something weird about him, he seemed a bit reserved around him. It wasn’t apparent, but the blonde was almost sure that sometimes the old master stared at him with a far look, like he was trying to understand something. Lloyd was not looking forward to whatever that was, he didn’t want to stick around the man when he found out.

Even so, the old master was being a huge help and he was training his siblings, so he wasn’t going to accuse him of anything. He simply shrugged, focusing elsewhere.

Like Kai groaning out loud. He really did improve physically, he had started the game in a jiffy.

“Come on! Why??” He stared at the balls like they were going to reveal some massive secret if he glared long enough. The old man, even older now, was chuckling almost evilly. “Well, if you think I’m giving up now, think again! I’m a powerful warrior now!” Quite curious that the ‘ninja never quit’ chant was so unequivocally him. Perhaps he was born to be a ninja.

Nya sighed, crossing her arms.

“Well, I guess this feels like home more than anything. Too bad the guys couldn’t come.” Apparently, there were fairs at their homes as well in this period, while Zane had decided to tag along with sensei Wu. “We should bring them along sometimes.”

Lloyd’s heart shivered for a moment. He shrugged again.

“I guess. But then… wouldn’t it be not our thing anymore?” He immediately went silent after that. He liked the other ninja, but it also felt like he was being left behind.

If he couldn’t fight, what was he good for?

“Oh. Right.” Nya smiled, pulling him in a little hug, like she always did. “Then maybe we keep this for ourselves, and bring the guys to the summer festival? Besides, Jay would have too much fun making fun of Kai like this.” As on cue their brother screamed again, a small ember detaching from his forehead like it was sweat. Their team joker would have totally had the time of his life, and it was too easy like that.

Lloyd let out a breath he didn’t know he was holding, looking at his courageous brother, and his confident sister. They were getting stronger, braver, they were moving forward. He didn’t want them to get too great for him to get close to.

Could he become a part of their new adventure, in some way?

***

Today was personal, like it had been every single year. Yet for once, Kai didn’t feel elated by the prospect of the challenge, he felt a rush of anxiety and need.

He had to win this time. There were no other options.

“Hey, slow down! We’re right behind you!” He could hear the steps behind him, and the comparison to a year ago almost made him tear up. Instead of steady steps and lighter ones, there were two pair of confident sounds following him. “Yes, we know where you’re headed, but why not slow down for once? It’s a celebration after all!”

Nya wasn’t wrong. They had defeated the Overlord, the world was saved. Wu’s brother had been saved, disappearing right after with a mysterious glare, but they could celebrate nonetheless.

Kai wanted to, he really did. But not before doing what he had to.

“I will rest once I get what I’ve been after for years, and now that we’re Ninjago’s saviors, I have proof that nothing can stop me!” He beamed when he saw the same shooting gallery with the same run down sign and the same grinning old man. “It happens today!”

He felt a sigh behind his back, and he shivered a little. It had been a while since the Tomorrow’s Tea incident, but a part of him was not used to it. Lloyd sounded old. Too old.

“Yeah, I heard it before.” He sounded grown-up. Too grown-up.

“We both did, and I’m starting to wonder if this is not about showing off like usual.” Nya walked in front of him, giving him a look. “You’ve been obsessed with winning that teddy bear for years now, what’s with that? Is this really just to prove yourself?” Her eyes got sharper with time, she could get whatever she wanted with her skills. She grew up too, just like that.

Kai breathed, feeling the weight of that promise going up to get out. He felt stupid about it, like he finally realized that if it mattered only to him, then perhaps it didn’t matter at all.

He was a ninja, now. But he was a brother, first.

“It… it was for you, at the beginning.” He confessed at last, making Nya widen her eyes. “When we were kids. I wasn’t too sure how to deal with a baby, but you liked toys, so I wanted to give it to you. Then mom and dad… left.” He winced at the pain in his heart, but he ignored it. “You were so sad, I wanted to cheer you up in some way. Then Lloyd came around and joined the family.” His little brother blinked. “Again, kids were never my specialty, so I wanted to welcome him in some way. Things got hectic after that, you guys were always into messed and I didn’t know how to solve them.” He rubbed his neck. “I wanted to make you happy.” He blushed. So embarrassing.

He barely had the time to register his shame when Nya launched herself into a hug, followed immediately by Lloyd. Kai’s throat felt heavy. How many times did he risk losing them lately? How many more in the future? All without him achieving something this simple?

Lloyd grinned tearfully at him.

“You’re such a dummy.” Oh, this brat. Kai was so ready to retort with a comment about his hair or something. “You saved me from a volcano, what else do you wanna do for me?” He decided not to.

He was the master of fire now, yet that heat was impossible to forget.

“And you came to rescue me when Lord Garmadon took me, did you forget about that already?” Nya snickered, like seeing her being taken away hadn’t been Kai’s worst memory. Yet she was here now. They were both here. Because of him? “You’ve taken care of us, just like we took care of you. We all got each other, always, so why do you think you need to prove anything?” She was giving him the look. The one of judgement, whenever she proved to be smarter.

She usually was, so was Lloyd. His siblings were strong and smart, and he genuinely was appalled with how much meaning they gave to his life. Maybe he was overthinking this, maybe this little game truly didn’t matter, but whenever he looked at them like this the pride got him to the point of urging him to do something, anything, to make them happy.

Kai sighed at the extremely determined eyes in front of him. They were relentless, as he himself usually was, it was interesting being on the receiving end.

“I know it’s no big deal, but I still wanted to win that…”

“I’m pretty sure you can buy a cheaper version in any shop at Ninjago City.” Nya crossed her arms. She wasn’t wrong, although it was still a bit weird getting used to the big city. “Besides, should you really keep giving money to a business based on a scam?”

The master of fire blinked. Several times.

“A what?”

“Really, Kai?” Lloyd snickered, shaking his head. “That game is rigged, those cups are never gonna fall by normal means. You’re telling me you never knew this?”

Shame. Embarrassment. Humiliation.

How was he supposed to know something like this?? Sure, when he was young the old man was particularly delighted whenever he missed a shot, sure, when he got better the cups were exceptionally hard to hit, sure, there were laughs behind every mistake of his like it was all a premeditated game, sure, he had never actually got a single cup down from that forsaken shelf, sure, the old man might have had a case full of tools in the back of his booth for whatever reason given how old this whole establishment was and…

… oh. He was so happy the guys were not here.

Although Lloyd was laughing so hard he probably did it for them too.

Nya giggled as well, grabbing his arm and pulling him away, under the very humorous eyes of the old man at that same chair, wearing that same toothless grin in his direction. He must have had a blast these years, seeing that challenge failing again and again.

Kai pouted.

“He shouldn’t make fun of a fire ninja.”

“It’s a bit hard showing that off when you don’t have a fire weapon.” Lloyd shrugged. “That man is annoying, but we can’t exactly do much about it.”

That felt like a defeat, which he did not like. But when his little brother held his other arm, and the three of them found themselves just enjoying the winter fair of their beloved Ignacia, Kai managed to forget about that humiliation for just a moment. He didn’t need to prove anything, it was a hard lesson to learn. Luckily, he had people to repeat it for him until it stuck.

***

The old man missed making fun of the Smith kid.

It had been a couple of years now, in which while Ninjago City got hit by the worst possible, he managed to keep himself safe and sound in the pacific Ignacia. Perhaps that bunch of brats got the worst of the disasters, which would have been quite the hit for him – mostly regarding his profit, as the brunette one was his best stupid client. There were voices about whatever was going on out there, between snakes, ghosts and even ninja.

A bunch of stories, if you asked him. Like heroes were a thing. Ninjago was simply too strong of a land to die like that, he was sure of it. There was no other reason.

When he saw him, he thought he was mistaken. Nope, not with that hair.

“Looks like something came back, at last! I thought you got devoured by those fake snakes!” He laughed like mad, glad to be able to bring some money back to his pocket. “Ready for the challenge once again? You’re fired up yet?”

His sister groaned, the other brother as well. What did he say?

His best client grinned, grabbing a ball.

“As a matter of fact…” It took a second. The ball caught fire, it was thrown, and all three piles were destroyed in an instant. “… I am.”

The old man felt his jaw dislocating.

“Wow, you didn’t even have to come up with some sort of fire pun on your own.” The blondie raised an eyebrow, like magic did not happen right in front of his eyes. “I can’t believe we made our way here from the monastery just for you to actually do this, we told you that you don’t have to- ah.” The brunette took one of the plushies at the booth, a green one with a flowery hat, and handed it to his brother. “… thanks, Kai.” He looked a bit flushed, likely a bit embarrassed by the exchange. It would have been wholesome was not for the fire.

The sister got handed a blue teddy bear with a little jacket, she hugged it in a child-like giggle.

“Alright, these are cute, maybe Ninjago City wouldn’t make them better.”

Then the guy, Kai, took the biggest one at the stand, the one he had been eyeing since he was a kid. It had a big red bow on the neck. He grinned.

“As I said, you’re coming with me.” He placed it on his shoulders, like it was a kid. He waved at the old man. “I win this time! Told you!” He smiled victoriously. He didn’t seem as naïve now. What did he go through after all this time? “See you next year!”

They turned around, walking together towards who knew where, and the old man found himself thinking of this moment. Was this it? Was he never going to see them again?

Then the fire made sense, their attires, the stories. He realized who he had seen grown up until now.

He laughed, once again, like always with these kids.

“I’ll have a better challenge ready! Just you wait!”

[roxineedstosleep]

Jason and Food

Then, for some reason I started to think a bit. And even more so after I saw a post talking about it.

We know that Jason lived on the streets for a long time growing up. He probably didn't even have money to eat anything in a bag; which meant he went to sleep without eating at all or finding a way to fill his stomach with something; anything.

Then Bruce arrives, who picks him up and takes him to the mansion.

Where Alfred, justifiably horrified at what the lack of food on the streets did to Jason, decides to feed him until he's stuffed; like a turkey being fed for Christmas.

Sure enough, Jason regains his health and weight, grows up a bit and now always has food with him. He knows that at the Mansion he will never go hungry or lack food; Dick, Alfred and Bruce have taught him that. 

Bruce already had snacks for Dick inside his Batman suit, but with Jason he doubled the snack pockets and began placing undeserving snacks inside the frequent surveillance points. Just so Jason would always have access to food.

Only for Jason. They were Jason’s snackss. Only his.

But, unfortunately, it doesn't mean he's not possessive of his food.

As if it's a reflex action from the streets he could never let go of.

Everyone in the mansion knows that Jason and his food are not to be touched. And if you eat it by mistake, because there are always tuppers and tuppers of leftovers in the fridge, you must replace it immediately. He won't say anything, nothing rude or aggressive, but ultimately you get blacklisted when he sees that you did something with his food.

Several League of Assassins adepts learned that the hard way when they ate his food. Thalia so far jokes about it, claiming that the thirst for the common good can be powerful, but the thirst for revenge for food can be more so.

Damian, being the youngest of the brothers and also being one of the first Jason met, is one of the few who can have the audacity to eat from his plate without asking. Just because he is a child, and children should not feel the pain in their stomachs when they are hungry.

Jason must be the first to offer the food, he must be the first to offer you a bite or he himself must give you a bite of HIS food, so that he is the first one to give you the go-ahead to take a bite. And well, therefore, he is also the first to ask if he can have a bite.

And that's why Jason goes to several food programs for the needy or forces all crime bosses to donate food on a weekly basis to food banks and shelters and orphanages. He doesn't want any child to suffer what he suffered. No one deserves to have that fear of not being able to eat.

[notkeepittogether]

Talking about Making Space

i dubbed this a concept album when i made it, but i think i misunderstood the definition at the time. i’d written a handful of songs during the year, which i had intended to release as an EP or an album, but most of the demos i had remained unfinished, even by december.

all of these songs are about my time in san francisco, over my birthday & also the christmas period in 2021. the plan was to go for my birthday, meet up with my friends, and have a silly time together. you may remember the great resurgence of covid cases that occurred in november/december of that year, which definitely plays a part in this. but keep in mind i had booked my flight in june.

admittedly, it was a stupid idea to plan a meetup with internet friends you made during lockdown, only a matter of months after said lockdown measures had been slightly relaxed. it was june and i’d figured things would be much better with the rate that things seemed to be improving and opening back up again. i had managed to avoid catching the dreaded illness up until that point, and i’d confidently gone in to take my fit-to-fly covid test two days before. but the night before my flight, my mum took a test of her own amidst coming down with what seemed to be a heavy cold, and when she called for me up the stairs with a panicked voice, i knew exactly what she was going to tell me.

i was faced with a tough decision. i hadn’t yet received the results of my fit-to-fly test but i realised i was potentially about to receive what i deemed would be earth-shattering news. i went to my dad’s place to spend the night and hopefully avoid catching the virus (if i hadn’t caught it already), mere hours before my flight. i told my friends that there was a chance i wouldn’t be able to make it, but even if my test was negative, there was still a chance that i had caught it and was still in the incubation stages.

we decided as a group that if the test was negative, it was probably better to just risk it and go anyway, rather than waste all the money i had already spent on getting there and staying there. so when the test came back negative, i went.

as you can probably guess from all this buildup, two days into the trip i developed my first covid symptom, and two days after that, i tested positive. i wasn’t the only one, though. we hadn’t thought in depth about what would happen if we weren’t able to get the negative tests we needed to get home. we had to extend the trip to accommodate for the ten day isolation period and to also let enough time pass by that we could produce negative tests again. this meant having to relocate to a smaller airbnb where we’d stay for christmas. what ensued during this period of isolation was what you might expect from four ill, stir-crazy, homesick people who had to spend christmas in a place with one bedroom in it. i won’t go into detail about what exactly happened, though - that’s what the album is for.

the album is the aftermath. the impact of this trip was still fresh in my mind and on my body as i had flown home on december 29th with seemingly worse symptoms than i’d had when i was actually sick with the virus. a delayed reaction (and probably a result of not sleeping for 36 hours on the journey home) with my lungs has flared up my asthma at the worst it had ever been. i was basically bedridden for the two weeks following my arrival home. i was feeling a lot of things, too. i had so many regrets - things i hadn’t said or done while with the people i was convinced i’d probably never see again, things i had said or done that i felt i had no control over at the time while my brain was at mercy to sickness and discomfort, making the decision to go while knowing the risks and bringing everyone down with me.

EDIT: we were also drunk for a lot of the time. i think that’s worth mentioning.

now, almost two years later, i don’t regret anything. (well, maybe some things.)

1. Making Space

this one’s very blatant in its lyricism. we, or at least i, was going completely stir crazy in this airbnb that had one bedroom in it. i was hating myself pretty intensely both during and after all of this had happened. i was rejecting the affection of all of my friends.

2. The Art of Texting

the year preceding this trip hadn’t been easy. i found myself seeking comfort in my friends who were willing to let me completely lean on them, so long as i let them do the same with me. this resulted in some unhealthy codependency that, despite the implications, i still look back on somewhat positively. how do you convey your deepest feelings to someone when all you can do is text or call them? (miscommunicate).

3. Understand (All the Best)

i came home feeling like i was broken. i had strong feelings, but they felt like the wrong feelings, and i regretted not letting myself get fully comfortable around the only people i’d ever been comfortable with.

4. Dunes

i believe it was on boxing day that i had finally had enough of being indoors. a friend and i went on a long walk down a nearby beach, at night, where we shared airpods (until they died) and listened to music out of a phone speaker (until it died) while walking up and down and climbing some of the sand dunes that had formed. it was the most peaceful i felt the entire time i was there.

the image for the album art was taken on this walk.

5. Are We Alright?

mainly focused on the aftermath of this trip - i had a lot i needed to fix once i got home. guilt was not enough. i was unthinkably cold. i had to wear gloves in my room.

6. New Year

written about the year of 2021 as a whole, and what i went through with my friends. i used this song as a general outlet for my deep desire to repair a friendship that i’d fucked up. i think it helped.

7. Bad at Talking

every single friendship i had was in a state of disrepair after this trip. i wasn’t entirely sure what everyone thought of me after meeting me in person for the first time and then immediately seeing me at my worst.

8. Late Again

i was feeling inadequate as a long distance friend, and also inadequate to fulfil life’s basic expectations of me. i wish i remembered the exact intentions i had as i was writing this. but the stuff about missing my train and being thirty minutes late to class actually happened.

9. Twin Beds

on my last night in san francisco, my friend and i shared a twin hotel room. it was the first time in a week that i had my own bed to sleep on. he floated the idea of sharing a bed and i thought it was both funny and outrageous.

i flew home the next morning, but two of my friends were hit with an endless stream of complications. one had such extreme delays due to weather that he missed his layover and had to spend an extra night away from home. the other found out that canada’s covid policies were different to that of the us and uk. they had to spend an extra two weeks(?) in san francisco, by themselves. i felt bad about how relieved i was to be at home while they still had not made it. part of me, now, wished i had stayed.

10. All the Best / Goodnight

reading these lyrics back, i’m transported back into the toxic mindset i was stuck in for a while after i returned home. i was struggling with a lot of self hatred, for a whole plethora of reasons, and i spent a lot of time wishing nobody knew me or thought of me at all now that i was painfully aware that people knew me and were thinking of me.

i still write songs about this experience today. i need to stop, but honestly it somewhat shaped me into the person i am now, unlocking desires and urges i didn’t know i had.

[anotheruserwithnoname]

Victoria - 4 years on

Today (May 12) marks the fourth anniversary of the first UK broadcast of the 3rd season (and possibly series) finale of Jenna Coleman’s Victoria in 2019. It’s amazing it’s been so long!

Of course Jenna has gone on to other work. As the season was finishing up on ITV, she was co-starring in a West End revival of All My Sons. A few months later she’d be in Thailand shooting The Serpent. Then of course C19 arrived (hard to believe, less than a year after Victoria aired!), and after a pause Jenna ended up in The Sandman, Klokkenluider, and other projects.

Is Victoria finished? Wikipedia’s page has it as cancelled, citing a statement by ITV dated from 2021 that there were no plans for a 4th season. I recall one article saying further production was unlikely due to C19 (which would technically put Victoria in the same company as GLOW and a few other series ended due to the pandemic, even though most other shows continued production). Daisy Goodwin, the show’s producer and writer, posted on Instagram sometime in 2019 that she’d written scripts for Series 4. And, of course, Series 3 (spoiler alert) ended on a cliffhanger.

There’s still hope that the show might return, perhaps as a one-off special. Yes, Jenna and Tom Hughes are no longer a couple - but there’s certainly precedent for exes to continue working together in TV and film, so that’s not necessarily a barrier. There’s certainly no time limit involved - Jenna could return to the role later in life quite easily (much as Judi Dench has done); in real life, Albert didn’t die for real until a decade or so after the events covered in Series 3.

But the fact remains Jenna has moved on. Maybe not into something ongoing (even Sandman S2 might only entail another one-off story, she won’t in in every episode, and The War Rooms is looking to be the TV equivalent of vaporware), but being tied to a TV series might have prevented her from taking on things like Jackdaw or the Lemons play - or whatever she might be doing next. She probably has no burning need or desire to return to Victoria (maybe not to the same degree she appears to be disinterested in reprising Clara Oswald), other than maybe the fact the series leaves viewers hanging so it’ll always remain a bit of “unfinished business” in that regard.

Her co-stars have also moved on. Nell Hudson is now a novelist; Margaret Clunie has been doing mostly independent films; Tom has been in several TV series and movies over the last couple of years.

But what we did get were 3 seasons (plus a Christmas special) of surprisingly light-hearted romantic drama, Vicbourne, Vicbert (I forgot the ship name), Jenna in nearly every scene, plus some great co-stars including Margaret and Nell, Rufus Sewell, and of course fellow Doctor Who-franchise veterans Tommy Knight and Eve Myles and, lest we forget, Diana Rigg also popped in for a visit when she wasn’t poisoning Joffrey Baratheon! LOL! I miss the show but am thankful we got what we got!

[oddree13]

Restless Year - Chapter 8

(Part 1) (Part 2) (Part 3) (Part 4)

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(Read on AO3)

Chapter 8 - Dreams

December 1989

Chicago is cold. It’s not like this is a revelation to Eddie, but the difference in the way Indiana feels in December and the way the Windy City is pummeling him is stark. He reluctantly traded his combat boots for what Steve calls ‘bean boots’ and if it wasn’t for his feet being so damn warm he’d be cursing Steve for giving him prep clothes.

He’s been anticipating the shop being a bit nightmarish in the run-up to the holidays, but the stream of customers is almost never-ending and the stock is running low. It got to the point that Eddie started calling other managers in the area to see how they were faring, and whether or not they could make tentative agreements to send customers hunting for particular finds to each other. 

Walking past the counter where Ezra is explaining to a mother why getting her thirteen-year-old a Frank Zappa album is a bad idea, he’s stopped by Jamie who is holding the phone up for him. “Eddie, someone named Max is calling? I asked for a last name and she audibly rolled her eyes.”

“Right, put her on hold and I’ll take it in the back. S’one of my kids,” he explains. The amount of adopted kids Eddie has is a running joke in the shop. All the staff know Dustin, but over the months, different calls have come in from the rest of the party, some of them asking for Eddie by name while others have straight up asked for Dad. It led to the staff comparing notes and swapping names until Eddie just put a group photo on his desk. 

“Red I assume the world is burning because you’re calling me instead of Steve. What’s up?”

“Has anyone ever told you that you’re dramatic? Like, have a normal phone conversation. Not everything is a campaign,” she quips and Eddie knows that she’s probably about to start a conversation she’d been avoiding for a bit.

“Fine, fine. Let me start over. Smash Records, Eddie Munson, manager speaking! Hello, Maxine, to what do I owe the pleasure!”

“I hope that causes you to get a rash. That sounded so plastic, ugh.” Max’s distaste is obvious and Eddie can picture her screwed-up face perfectly. “Look I’m calling because I’m coming to stay with you and Steve the day after Christmas until school starts up again. I already bought my bus ticket.”

It’s moments like this Eddie semi-regrets Steve’s open invitation to the kids. Steve probably thought they’d ask ahead of time, whereas Eddie knew better. Eddie knows Max must be telling not asking for a reason, so he lets it go. A quick glance at his calendar shows that Wayne will be gone by then, so they’ll have space. 

“Sounds like a good time. I could use a hand at the shop. Any particular reason you’re coming to crash with us instead of staying with Lucas or El? Or do you just miss us that much?”

“I’ve never been to Chicago and I’ve got the time off, so I figured why not?”

Why Eddie expected a straight answer, he’ll never know. He assumes it has something to do with not wanting to be around her mother for longer than she needs to and escaping the looks of concern she’ll get if she lingers around Hawkins. But those are assumptions Steve will have to suss out when she arrives. 

“I’ll let Steve know tonight and one of us will get you from the station on the 26th. And if you play your cards right I’ll let you have a recommendation space on the staff shelf.”

“Your shop would be lucky to display my choices, so really I’m doing you a favor,” she counters and Eddie can’t help but chuckle in amusement.

“Well, I’ve got to get back to work but can’t wait to see you Red.”

“Thanks, Eddie...and tell Steve thanks too.”

Before Eddie can say bye the line cuts and he likes to think his own children won’t be so ill-mannered. “Ugh, that sounded like Steve...”

Over dinner that night Eddie lets Steve know about Max’s plan and her delivery of it. 

“Of course, she just up and bought a ticket. Do you actually think she’d ask and chance us saying no? That’s not how Max operates.”

“I dunno, that seems more like a Mike move than a Max one, is all,” Eddie thinks, twirling his spaghetti around his fork. 

“Ah, see, there is the difference. Mike would just up and buy a ticket to come stay with us because he feels entitled to do it. He wouldn’t actually come to see both of us, just you and the city. But Max? Max bought a ticket and just told us to lessen the chance of rejection. Because for all the bravado Mayfield has, she’s still the kid who’d rather sit on your steps listening to you play guitar than go home. I’m just happy we can still be that for her.”

Eddie stopped eating midway through Steve’s analysis and just looks at his mate with fondness. For all of Steve’s complaints about how much the kids of their pack irritate him, it’s times like this that demonstrate his love. It really shows just how much effort Steve has put in over the years to make himself a safe haven for the kids. 

“You know, I really ought to make a mom out of you already with how well you do with them.” Eddie enjoys the blush that creeps up Steve’s neck at the suggestion and glances over to the bedroom. 

“I’m not stopping you Eds.”

*

There are too many yentas in this deli. Sure he got a few stares at his old place in South Bend, but these stares are making Eddie think it's time to suck it up and learn how to cook his own brisket. Steve put in the order a few weeks ago but is currently in bed wiped out from finals swallowing tums, so Eddie offered to make the trek out with Wayne.

He’s leaning against the back wall waiting for his order to come out while Wayne mutters about having braved the L. “I still don’t know why we couldn’t have just taken your car,” he grumbles, looking a little worse for wear. 

“Wayne, you served in Vietnam, but public transit is where you draw the line?” The resounding silence gives him all the answers he needs. 

“So how's married life treatin’ ya?” Wayne asks after some time, and Eddie can’t help but smile. 

“It’s good. Not a lot has changed, which I think is for the better. Had a bit of a rough patch a few months ago but turns out we just needed to get our heads out of our asses.”

Wayne nods. “It’s good that you can admit you were wrong. I remember you had trouble doing that growing up.”

“Who says I was in the wrong?” The quirked brow from Wayne makes Eddie tsk. “I really don’t appreciate that he’s become your favorite nephew you know? Stevie can do no wrong in your eyes now that you know he’s nothing like his father.”

“Oh no, I’m sure your boy can do plenty wrong. But it takes a particular kind of person to light a fire under your ass and get you moving. Now, look at you. Living on your own, running a fine store. Next thing you know you’ll be calling me to tell me you’re going to be a dad.” Wayne chuckles a bit at the last part, and Eddie scuffs the floor with his boot. 

“I mean would that be so far-fetched?”

“You got something to tell me?”

Eddie shakes his head and feels Wayne’s gaze on him. Their heart-to-hearts are infrequent. Their relationship is built between the lines of their words and usually, that’s fine with Eddie. It’s just, right now he needs  a little bit more. 

“I don’t think it’d be that far-fetched. You’re not your old man Eddie, if that’s what you need to hear. My brother only made two good decisions in his life. Marrying your mom and having you. You might have his name but you ain’t him at all.” Wayne claps his shoulder and pulls Eddie to his side for a hug.

“Harrington! Order for Harrington!” 

Eddie moves from Wayne’s embrace and goes to grab their order when he sees Wayne head towards the door. 

“Where are you going?”

“To get a cab. I’m not chancing that brisket to the train.”

*

They had one day between visits. It was the twenty-fifth and the shop was closed like most other places in Chicago, which lent itself to a lazy morning. 

A year ago getting Eddie out of bed was like pulling teeth, but now the alpha finds himself up first most mornings for work. The upside to his new sleep schedule is on days like this he can just stay in bed and admire Steve. His mate is still sleeping, hugging a pillow to his chest. The t-shirt he wore to bed is one of Eddie’s older Anthrax shirts, threadbare with a few holes, but Steve refuses to let Eddie toss it. For as much as his mate doesn’t nest, he hoards Eddie’s old band shirts like a dragon with a treasure. 

Rolling over, Eddie presses against Steve’s back, burying his nose in his hair. Ever since their bonding, Steve’s scent has morphed. It’s richer, almost spiced, and Eddie can’t get enough. He wonders if he also smells like this but he can’t tell. It’s a question for awake Steve. Right now he’s enjoying the sleepy Steve who is turning over to press into Eddie’s chest on instinct. After the night Steve flinched away from him, Eddie appreciates everytime Steve seeks him out. Today is no exception. 

Eddie plays with Steve’s hair and traces his hand down his back, just basking in the morning light until he notices flurries falling outside the window. Watching the snowflakes dance in the wind, Eddie wonders if Hawkins is getting snow. El runs around outside every time it does and he hopes that she’s waking up to that Christmas morning. ‘They deserve the chance to be kids’ he thinks and it sounds an awful lot like Steve. 

He watches the snowfall until Steve’s lips start to kiss his neck, nipping gently at Eddie’s faux-mark. The moment the tattoo finished healing, Steve found any excuse he could to touch it, be it with his fingers, lips, teeth, or what have you. The bond has brought out Steve’s possessive side and Eddie can’t help but indulge it like right now. 

“Making sure it’s still there baby?” he whispers, scratching at the nape of Steve’s neck. His question just earns him a nod as Steve’s affection trails up his jaw until they’re kissing. Eddie turns into Steve’s embrace and trades lazy kisses with him. The softness of the morning makes Eddie want to go back in time and slap his past self for thinking he would never have this. That his own self-doubt almost kept him from having Steve Harrington in his bed every morning and every night. Because waking up to this feeling beats any high Eddie has ever had. 

When the sunlight becomes too bright for them to ignore the morning, Eddie makes the first move to roll out of bed. “Breakfast? I’ll make it.”

“That means I’m getting pancakes because that is the only thing you can somehow make.” Steve’s face is fond as he looks over at Eddie, and he’ll take the teasing. 

“Yes, I am offering flour pancakes because we have enough potato ones in the freezer to last the rest of winter.”

“Will you ever let that go,” Steve groans, and Eddie dives back onto the bed to tackle Steve, pulling his reddening face away from the pillow he’s trying to bury it in.

“Absolutely not. I’ve never seen someone so determined to get latkes right. They’re potatoes, Steve. Hash browns.”

“I see how it is. You don’t appreciate my trial and error process. And to think next year I was going to start attempting to braise brisket. I should just stick to my waspy recipes.”

That threat makes Eddie start kissing Steve’s face all over as he begs for forgiveness. “I never said anything. In fact, thank you for taking this so seriously and I look forward to you perfecting your brisket recipe. Now let me cook for you. Do you want coffee?”

Steve’s face scrunches at the offer. “No, I don’t think I could stomach it this morning. Besides, I’ll -” 

Steve stops mid-sentence and Eddie follows his gaze to see Steve looking out the window. “It’s snowing.” The statement is so simple but Eddie sort of likes proof that Steve’s been so wrapped up in their world that he hadn’t noticed the one going on outside. 

“I wonder if it’s snowing in Hawkins. El would love it,” Steve voices, and Eddie can’t help but laugh in agreement. 

“She really would.”