#reflection • what if i told you the world wouldn't end if you started showing what's under your skin?

[libbystcwart]

tag drop!

[codacheetah]

Tell me your opinions on the stuff. Any stuff.

Grins. Smiles, even

I'm using you as an excuse to infodump my theory about the Island because I've had no in to do that, and my theory is pure opinion. Anyways:

THE ISLAND IS STUCK IN THE FUCKING FUTURE

(SCARE CHORD)

Hi so you might ask me. What the fuck do you mean by that. Well. Let's start with what we know about the Island, the King, and Wish Craft. (long ass post under cut. sorry)

The Island was redacted from the perception of outside world, via Wish Craft.

Wish Craft has the power to enable Time Craft. We see this primarily through Siffrin's timeloops, but also through the King's powers.

One of the King's powers is to show the saviors a "vision of the future."

...And this same attack is deflected back at the King by Mirabelle in ACT 5, in which the King is able to see the Island before being frozen in time.

...So. The King's "vision of the future." We're never told explicitly what this vision is. All we know is that it's apparently powerful enough to wipe the party in one hit, hearing it from a distance hurts your head, and that whatever Siffrin (and Loop) saw, they don't seem to actually be able to describe it. Even the King himself doesn't know what his vision entails.

We don't know whether the party all sees the same thing when struck by the vision, and Adrienne's answer to the question about it in the Reddit AMA is. vague? It's not a "no," and the specific wording makes me think the answer might be yes. But that's me reading into it.

Now. What do we know about the Island's redaction? The Island was affected by the wish recently, as in "like a decade ago" recently. We know that nobody in Vaugarde or the rest of the world is capable of thinking about the Island, anything closely tied to the Island's culture, or people on the Island for very long. When they do recall these things, they slip right out of reach. Particularly, the consequence for trying to think about the Island (or, more specifically, break the wish that forces the Island out of perception) is significant pain, localized in the head.

And that said pain is enough to become lethal, if pressed hard enough.

From here forward I'm running with the assumption that the King's "vision of the future" is not personalized to any individual, and is unchanging throughout the course of the whole story. Now. Remember the end of ACT 5, where the King gets hit with the deflected "vision of the future", and instead of dying, he recalls the Island and gets frozen in time? Very odd, yeah? Why wouldn't the King just die like everyone else does? He even does take 9999 damage when trying to say its name, like Siffrin does, and like the party does when they're hit by the attack.

Well. We know that he has a "true wish" that the ability to freeze Vaugarde in time grants. I don't think it's at all a stretch to guess that the King's "true wish" is to be able to remember the Island. My personal guess is that the King (and Siffrin) brought this "true wish" into effect via the "SAY ITS NAME" sequence- he even tries three times, a significant number in wishing.

The King (and Siffrin's) wish breaks, because it can't be fulfilled in this moment without breaking the wish to prevent the Island from being thought about. However. Consider the conditions at the end of ACT 5- the King sees the vision of the future reflected back to him, and what he sees is the Island. He remembers the Island, fulfilling his own wish, and is frozen in time. I consider this a compromise between his wish and the one binding the Island- the King gets to remember the Island, but nobody alive is able to think about it, because he's frozen in time; it's like the Universe is correcting itself (I WILL GET BACK TO THIS). The wish of all of Vaugarde to defeat the King is fulfilled, since he is no longer a threat, and Siffrin's wish wraps itself up soon after.

MY POINT BEING. The King's attack is a vision of the future. This "future" is of the Island, in some uncorrupted state. The saviors see it when he attacks them, and he sees it when it is deflected back to him.

The logical next question is "okay, so the Island exists in the future, but how do you know time shenanigans are even related to the Island?"

Recall a very odd series of interactions throughout the game, in which you try to interact with a piece of equipment that you already own.

The game rewinds slightly, before the item disappears, as the Universe corrects itself.

This is awfully similar to two particular events: looping back without seeing the death screen, and talking to the Daydreaming One about her sister. The latter is more interesting to me for the purposes of this theory.

In both instances, something is misaligned within the Universe (an item existing in two places, someone remembering something they're not supposed to) and it is corrected through some sort of rewind. Also compare the dialogue above to when you try to give Mirabelle the Stylish Bow when you already own it.

The world glitches, but Siffrin defuses the situation before the Universe has to intervene. Omitted from the screenshot is the fact that Mirabelle's portraits switch to happy from "catastrophically anxious" with no transition after Siffrin shows her where the bow is. Important to note is that when Mirabelle tries to recall receiving the bow, her head hurts, much like how trying to break the Island wish causes a headache.

The Universe leads you away from perception, and you can only follow.

My theory that I keep circling around is that through Wish Craft, the Island has been displaced temporally. The denizens of the Island, as well as the Island itself, still exist, but they are in the future. The Island is still loaded into the world, like how equipment is before you try to interact with it, and the Island cannot leave this quantum state, because it never actually went anywhere. The magnitude of the redaction event is so severe with the Island, because it is so much larger as an entity than a sword or a bow. There are of course things I don't really have pieced together, like why somebody would wish the Island into the future, how far into the future it is, or why equipment behaves this way. But it's the only Island theory I've seen that I have some level of confidence in, so I might as well lay out my cards for it.

[nevernonline]

✧.* change my mind; kmg

you were an enigma. mingyu knew you to be not afraid of anything, except for falling in love.

✩ pairing: mingyu x afab! reader

✩ genre/s: fwb! to lovers, fluff,

✩ word count: 2.0k

✩ warning/s: mentions of partying, swearing, suggestive themes, oral, punches, mingyu takes a tumble, kissing, reader has breasts, mingyu is down bad.

✩ notes/s: inspired by she's not afraid by one direction, lolol. enjoy! ☘️

Mingyu just couldn’t figure you out, for the first time in two years of knowing you he saw fear in your eyes all because he whispered three little words to you. 

He had heard all of your childhood and teenage crazy stories about making fake ids, bungee jumping, traveling all around the world during your gap year. He knows you can watch scary movies and often fall asleep to serial killer documentaries, but why wouldn’t you let him love you? 

The first time he said it, he was just protecting you or so he thought from an ex-boyfriend who showed up to the party you were attending, trying to pick a fight and begging you to take him back. Mingyu showed up to your side without a shadow of a doubt he would scare the boy away, but you just punched your ex square in the face as he called you a bitch and walked off like nothing had happened. 

After the punch you just rode in the car back to your house without saying a word. He was holding your now bruised hand softly resting a bottle of cold water across your knuckles. 

When you made it back inside your adrenaline kicked in and you started to strip Mingyu of his clothes all the way down to his black boxer-briefs below. He was basically an outlet for you to get out your rage over your shitty ex-boyfriend, but he didn’t mind being used by you. 

Maybe he said it at the wrong moment? A girl going down on you isn’t exactly the time to tell her that you’re in love with her. He thought maybe you didn’t hear him or misunderstood because you were focused on satisfying the craving of having him be putty in your hands, so he never brought it up again. Well, except when he finished all over your pretty face. 

The second time he said it, it was a cold winter day. You both decided it would be a good idea to go snowboarding. You were taking Mingyu up the ski lift for his first pass down the mountain, your eyes were filled with sparkles from the reflection of the snow, he couldn’t forget how pretty it made you look. Your pink nose and rosy cheeks were just begging for him to plant kisses on. 

You told Mingyu to go to the far left trail, the easiest and to not turn before the big pine tree, but he was so distracted by looking at you he did exactly the opposite of what you said and took a swerve right onto the black diamond.

 You ended up going the right way, watching his body attempt to swerve over the bumps and fresh powdered ground through the trees. Until you couldn’t see him anymore. A panic suddenly waved over both of you not being able to help him if something went wrong in the woods. The train was much quicker down the hill and the small skinny weaving through trees made him vulnerable if he fell to being hit by other boarders or skiers. 

You finally hit the bottom and clicked your board off trekking back up the hill by foot. 

Nearly halfway down you spotted a bright yellow and black coat huddled to the side of the tree brush and ran over to him. He seemed okay, but was clearly shaken up by almost getting hit by other riders. 

“Oh my god. You’re such an idiot, I thought you were hurt. Did you not hear my instructions” 

“I did, but I was distracted watching you on the lift so I forgot.” 

“Mingyu, you dumbass. I wouldn't have forgiven myself if something happened to you.” 

Your fingers touched the small cut on his cheek probably from his goggles or a loose branch. You brought your arms so tightly around his shoulders that he whimpered because of his now sore body. 

After picking up his gear that had been scattered around from his fall, you helped him back onto his feet and insisted that you bring him home to have a warm bath and clean up his new wound. 

Sitting in the bathtub, bruises scattered all the way around his tanned skin, he watched you set up a movie on your computer. You were surprisingly caring, he didn’t think you had a side to you like this. 

The both of you sat in his candle lit bathroom, him in the hot water of his tub and you in his tee shirt on his marbled floor, both sipping glasses of red wine, just enjoying the scenes playing out in front of you. 

Suddenly his hands came onto your shoulders, rubbing them in motions that relaxed your tense muscles. 

“You look cold, come in.” 

“No, you’re too tall for two people to fit in your bathtub, Gyu.” 

“You’re small enough to fit, come on.” 

“Okay, don’t look.” 

“I’ve seen you naked before.” 

“Just, please don’t look, for some reason getting into the tub infront of you is embarrassing me.” 

“Okay, I won't.” 

With his hands now placed over his eyes, he felt your legs slide against his, and felt you tap against his side with your feet, telling him it’s fine now. 

“No, not like that. Turn around, back towards me.” 

“Mingyu, this is silly, I'm comfortable.” 

“Do it or I’ll make you.” 

“Oh my god fine, cover your eyes.” 

Your butt slid back into the hot water, now resting between his legs. You could feel your cheeks starting to hear up as you rest your bare back against his chest. 

“Better?” 

“Mhm, much better.” 

Mingyu’s hands came up and grabbed your hair, wrapping it up in the claw clip you had resting on the floor and began massaging your neck once more, placing soft kisses on your shoulders. Mingyu now slid his long fingers over your nipples, making your head rest back against him and letting out a soft moan from your lips. 

“Thank you for taking care of me today, it means a lot to me.” 

“Well it’s sort of my fault you got hurt isn’t it?” 

“No, not at all actually. I shouldn’t have let myself get distracted by how pretty you are.” 

“Shut up.” 

“Not happening, pretty girls have to be told every once and a while they’re pretty.” 

“Okay, what about pretty boys?” 

“Mhm, they deserve it too.” 

“Well then, I think you’re very pretty.” 

“Thank you, I love hearing you say that.” 

Time passed that night between being sweet in the tub to now huddling in front of Mingyu’s fireplace, still wrapped in each other's arms, clinging to his warmth. 

“Are you ready for bed, y/n?” 

You were already asleep in his arms, suddenly those same arms were picking you up off the floor and placing you under his warm covers, sliding in next to you. 

With a kiss on your forehead, you woke up still half in your slumber and placed a longer kiss on his lips. 

“Goodnight, pretty Gyu.” 

Mingyu couldn’t contain his smile as he looked at your eyes closed while resting on his pillow. 

“Goodnight, pretty girl. I love you.” 

Mingyu couldn’t help himself from realizing he was saying the thing he wanted so badly in the worst moments, but maybe it was a sign he was saving himself from being hurt if you didn’t love him back. 

After the night you had over a week ago where he muttered those words the second time he  made a promise to himself that the next time he said it, it would be worth it. 

Mingyu knew tonight was to tell you properly, you were on your way to celebrate a mutual friend's birthday. 

He pulled up to your house, letting himself inside. He found you standing in your bra and underwear in front of your closet contemplating what to wear. The theme was black and red, you had a little black dress, a red low cut tank top, and a pair of black cargo pants laid out on your bed, weighing the options. 

“Holy shit. You scared the fuck out of me.” 

Mingyu tried to hold in his laughter as he rested his butt on the side of your bed, holding up the red top and black pants, similar to the outfit he was sporting. 

“Wear this, it’s nice. And you always complain when you wear dresses.” 

“You’re right, but what shoes do I wear? Black heels, sneakers, or boots?” 

“I like the boots I bought you last year, they’d look pretty under the jeans. And you can be closer to my lips when you get drunk and try to kiss me later. Easier access.” 

“Shut up, you’re so gross. I do not do that.” 

“Well, your clingy drunk ass says otherwise.” 

You ripped the red shirt from his hands and pulled it over your head swiftly as you took your bra off from under it and shimmied into your black pants. 

“Okay, well let’s bet. I’ll wear my sneakers, if I try to kiss you and complain that you’re too tall I’ll reward you with whatever you want” 

“Alright, but prepare to be crushed.” 

Hours passed by at the party, as your buzz grew stronger like your desire to have your red lipstick stained all over Mingyu. He was off talking to some girl at the bar, trying to order you drinks. You were sitting all the way across the room at your table watching her as she rubbed her pink fingernails up and down his arm, while he just smiled. 

Was he trying to make you jealous on purpose so you’d come over and kiss him? Did he even care that this girl was flirting with him because he was there with you? Who knows what he’s thinking. Before he departed she placed a small kiss on his cheek and handed him a napkin, probably with her number on it. 

“Who the fuck was she?” 

Your jealousy brought a small smile on Mingyu’s lips as he slid onto the black vinyl of the booth back next to you, hitting your knees with his. 

“Jealous?” 

“No, just answer the question. She got her ugly pink lipgloss on your cheek.” 

The lip stain that was supposed to be from you, the green monster of your jealousy weighing over you now as you brought your thumb to the spot she kissed him and wiped it away a little aggressively. 

“Not sure, she gave me her number though.” 

He flashed the napkin in front of your face, making you even more angry. 

“Call her, I’m going home okay?” 

“No, why are you leaving? I don’t want to call her I was just fucking with you.” 

“Will you stop then?” 

“Of course, just tell me what's up with you tonight? You’re acting weird, girls do that all the time, you’ve never cared before in fact most of the time you think it’s funny. I thought you knew I didn’t want any of them, so it didn’t bother you?” 

“Well it is bothering me now, she was touching you and she kissed you. Most girls just hand it and go on their way, but this was like right in my face? Does she not see us here together?” 

“Maybe? But, we’re not together like that are we? I’ve told you many times I love you and you always ignore me.” 

“I don’t know? I do love you, okay? I love you, Mingyu. I’m also terrified of loving you, because if I fucking lose you I’m not going to be okay. If I have to sit around and watch girls have their hands on you forever like that I just am not sure if I’ll be able to handle myself.” 

“You love me?” 

“Yes, you big dumb idiot. Can’t you fucking tell?” 

“No, but it’s nice to hear you finally say it.” 

“Can we leave now please? I think I need to show you how much I love you at home.” 

“I like the sound of that.” 

Mingyu took you home, back to the place where he first realized he loved you and let you prove it to him all night.

[ashwhowrites]

Rockstar! Eddie Munson x Reader, so what if he met reader at some concert and they ended up hooking up, then Reader got pregnant and she told Eddie (like idk, maybe she saw him somewhere, or he gave her his number?) so he was scared at first but then he tried to help her in everything she needed, after some months they started dating, and then they had a girl, and Eddie was like full on dad mode? (I imagine like Eddie being scared about it, bc he liked Reader but they kind of "hate" each other, but it's bc they don't know each other very well, and also I imagine him talking with Wayne, and Wayne being like don't be scared, you're gonna be a great dad, or something like that?) Idk if this made sense, but I hope it does!

I hope this is what you wanted and you enjoy it. Thank you for requesting 🫶🏻

Eddie couldn't help but let the tears run down his face when Y/N handed over their baby girl. Y/N was exhausted, sweat in her hair but Eddie thought she looked as beautiful as the day he met her. She closed her eyes for much-needed rest, leaving Eddie alone with his thoughts and a tiny baby in his arms.

He rocked the baby gently, remembering all the mini-lessons Wayne gave him throughout Y/N's pregnancy. He prepared for this day for the last 9 months, yet he felt like he was in over his head. But he focused on the way his heart exploded with so much love for the two girls in front of him. The very two girls who changed his life for the better and showed him what falling in love was like.

As Eddie listened to the little cries of his daughter, he couldn't help but reflect on everything that got him to this exact spot.

~~~

The adrenaline ran through his veins as he raced off the stage, his shirt glued to his chest with sweat, and the screams echoing in his ears.

Eddie headed straight to the nearest bar and drank until he barely remembered a thing. Some sweet voice in his ear, a soft pair of lips on his, and hands removing his clothes. It was all a blur, he woke up alone but the taste of her was on his tongue.

He went to sleep every night trying to rack his brain to remember her, even a tiny glimpse. He swore he felt her touch still and her scent lingered on the shirt he wore that night.

But Eddie was used to one-night stands so he figured she'd be another figure he fell asleep with but wouldn't wake up to see again.

And boy was he wrong.

~

He felt like he was going to throw up. A beautiful girl, who he learned was Y/N, sat across from him with a sick expression. A number called and called him over and over, it was driving him insane so he finally picked up. He did not expect a girl on the other line to say she was pregnant with his baby.

Sadly, he had to take precautions with his level of fame. He knew getting blacked out drunk with random women was a dangerous game, he just thought he was smart enough to not have consequences.

"How...we sure...proof it's mine?" Eddie squeaked out. The confident man, who held all the charisma in his smirk, was not across from her. The big rockstar who loved the spotlight seemed frozen and scared. His eyes didn't know where to look, so he looked everywhere. His fingers were pressing into his palm, and she guessed he would leave marks on his nails.

"Yes, I know it's yours. And look I know you have this whole touring the world and being a rockstar. I've been a fan of you for years so I know this is a dream you waited forever for, and since we aren't in a relationship and it was a one-night stand, it's your choice if you want to be involved or not. You have my number, use it if you want." She said, she slid over a small ultrasound picture and left the small diner.

Eddie's eyes locked on the photo and he couldn't breathe. The tiny blob made his heart race with anxiety and his stomach twisted in so many knots. If he was terrified of the tiny thing in that picture, he couldn't imagine having a whole baby.

He was torn. In so many ways it would be easier to act like it didn't happen. To continue the tour and never think about it again. She allowed him to run, but yet he didn't want to run away from her. She haunted his memory and he tried for months to figure out who that girl was that he remembered feeling. And now that he saw her, he wanted to see her face again and again.

He found himself trusting her. Not doubting her an inch. His manager told him to demand a DNA test of some sort before Eddie "ruined" his career, but her eyes were honest. He felt like he already knew her and knew she'd always be true to him. She wanted him to have his dream still, but it wasn't fair to pick a dream with a time limit over a child's life....his child's life.

~

Whenever Eddie was stuck in life, he flew to Hawkins and knocked on that tiny trailer. No matter how many times Eddie begged Wayne to let him pay for a big home, Wayne refused. He loved his life in his small trailer.

Eddie told Wayne everything, embarrassed as Wayne gave him that disapproving look when Eddie told him about all the one-night stands.

"And now she's pregnant. It's up to me to be involved or not. " Eddie said, biting his nails as he watched Wayne for an answer.

"And?" Wayne asked, his arms crossed as he eyed the nervous boy.

"And what?"

"What are you telling me for? Don't you tell me that you want me to tell you what to do, boy?" Wayne said, Eddie has been scolded by Wayne many times in his life, and somehow this felt scarier.

Eddie gulped but nodded his head in defeat. "I don't know what to do. I have no idea how to be a dad. I don't know how to take care of myself. I'm irresponsible and don't even have a solid place to live since I planned to be on the road. I don't have anything good to offer her or this child."

"Get over here," Wayne grunted, he uncrossed his arms.

"Are you going to hit me?" Eddie asked, slowly moving towards him.

"No." With the green light, Eddie walked over, he opened his arms thinking Wayne was going to offer a comforting hug. But instead, he got a smack to the back of his head.

"YOU SAID YOU WEREN'T GOING TO HIT!" Eddie yelled, rubbing the sore spot on the back of his head.

"Of course, I'm gonna knock some sense into you, kid! You don't know how to be a dad because you don't have the experience. No one knows how to be a parent until they learn. They have classes and books, and I'll help you. I wasn't a dad until you came along, and I'm proud of who you became. I started with no idea what to do but I made it work. You are going to do the same. Unlike you, she doesn't get the option to run away. And you are not letting her do this alone. Understood?" Wayne demanded.

"Understood."

~~~

Y/N was very shocked when Eddie called and asked to talk. She figured he'd take the opportunity to run and never looked back.

But as her stomach grew, so did her feelings for Eddie. He was the sweetest boy she ever met. He was terrified, but he held it together for her. Whenever she read another birthing book and felt like she was going to panic, he was right there.

When she hit around 5 months, she confessed her complicated feelings towards Eddie. To her surprise, he felt the same. All that time planning for their baby brought them closer together and they understood they'd have a connection to each other that they wouldn't experience with someone else.

Their first kiss, not drunk, was something they both would remember. It wasn't at a huge romantic place with candles everywhere. It was in their own home, in the nursery as Eddie put together the little crib. They were so overwhelmed with the emotion of having a family together and Eddie couldn't wait. He desired to kiss her since the diner and he felt fireworks in his stomach when he first placed his lips on hers.

After a few months passed and she was weeks away from giving birth, Eddie ended his tour early. He made sure he never left her side. Even though their relationship was freshly new, he moved in with her. He wanted to be there all the time for her and their baby. He knew he was in love with her, and he didn't plan to let her go anyway. So why wait?

Wayne was proud, and damn excited to be a grandpa. He turned Eddie's old room into a nursery and begged to babysit whenever it was needed. Wayne fell in love with Y/N within seconds of meeting her. He understood why Eddie was so sure about her.

Eddie read all the books and did all the classes, which meant he might have been too involved.

"Can you sit fine? I can help you." Eddie said through the bathroom door. A loud sigh left Y/N's lips.

"Edward, I told you for the last three hours that I can pee by myself!"

~

"Book says you shouldn't be on your feet this long. Why don't you sit." Eddie said as he quickly through the groceries into the cart.

"Sit where? It's a grocery store." Y/N laughed, having no issues walking through the store.

"Here," Eddie said as he took off his jacket and placed it on the dirty floor.

"Eddie, ew! And I'm not sitting on the floor. There's no way I'll get back up."

~

"Did you cook with the safe foods? Do you have the list of things she can't eat?" Eddie asked as Wayne brought over three plates.

"Edward" both Wayne and Y/N groaned

~

"Lady! You need to move faster. You are holding up the line!" A man groaned as Y/N tried to keep her composure.

"There's a line in front of me! I can't go anywhere, asshole!"

"I hope your bastard of a child doesn't get that kind of lip." The man laughed like his joke was funny. She could feel Eddie tensing as he joined the line next to her. He arrived at the wrong time...or the right time?

Before she could react, Eddie came swinging. His right knuckle cracked against the man's nose. The man dropped to the floor in a groan.

"Don't talk to her like that and don't ever speak about my child like that," Eddie growled.

~

And when it came the day her water broke, he felt more prepared than ever. He held her hand and tried not to flinch as she squeezed it until she cracked his bones. He drove as fast and safely as he could to the hospital. His brain couldn't wrap around the thought that his daughter was hours from being born.

This was finally it

He was going to be a dad

~~

"And now I'm your dad and I'm going to love you more than anything in this world. Your mom is amazing and I can't wait to watch you grow up to be just like her." Eddie whispered, the baby falling asleep to his story as he continued to rock her.

He looked up to see Y/N fast asleep, and he couldn't help but feel a strong amount of love for the two sleeping beauties that were now always going to be part of his life.

Tags!

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[berryless]

As much as Astarion likes to pretend he's better than everyone, the truth is—when the performance ends, and the curtains draw to a close, he stays on the stage alone and forgotten, unworthy of attention when he isn't a spectacle. That's why his little theater is open for everyone around the clock. Every act, every movement, every phrase, although deftly improvised, is part of the show.

Everything to prevent the crowd from discovering the truth.

Everything to fool himself into forgetting said truth himself.

That outside of the spotlight, away from the little stage of his, when he looks in someone's eyes, Astarion doesn't see himself reflected in them. They look at him, but also past him, through him, like he's nothing but an empty space, a person-shaped hole in the fabric of the world that someone forgot to mend.

And because this happens oh so every often this thought is no longer a fear of his, not something he can doubt, but a simple fact.

They don't see him. They don't know him.

They don't care to.

Admittedly, this makes it easier to stomach luring them back to Cazador. Because of course a performance of century would require a fee. Nothing in this world is free. Certainly not his services.

And he is but a humble baitman, a shining lantern attracting moths to leap into the flames of eternal damnation.

A tool.

And as a tool he does what he's told to do unless he wants to end up discarded and broken like others disobedient useless tools were.

But then Tav sees him. And it's frightening.

Because suddenly after the show is over, after the curtains are drawn, after everything falls back to silence, and he returns to being in nothingness, he isn't truly alone on this stage anymore.

She's here, sitting quietly, looking at him in a contemplation, thinking who knows what—Astarion certainly doesn't. And her presence alone is forcing him to put back his stage costume and perform off clock, asking in jest if she happened to lost herself in his eyes, because it certainly wouldn't be the first for this to happen, he does have pretty eyes (or so he's been told enough to regurgitate the sentiment appropriately).

Tav laughs, "As a matter of fact, you do. But…" Her voice trails off, and that uncomfortable stare returns. She looks at him, lost in thoughts as she gathers her words, and a wave of goosebumps runs up Astarions arms when it comes to him she actually sees him.

Wants to see him.

Through him—in a different, completely foreign way, not skipping past his existence, but uncovering it and studying its insides. His insides.

The notion makes him nauseous.

His fingers start to tremble, and Astarion hides them in his fists.

He never knew that being perceived might be so frightening.

He's far more comfortable with everything being the usual way, for people withdrawing when the performance ends, for them seeing past him, but not him, because if they judge his mask, his persona, his act—that's a critique of his presentation. His work, if you will. His craft.

Not of Astarion himself.

And as it shockingly turns out, he might not like receiving judgment on something that he, an actor, an author, a man behind the stage is.

"You have far more than just those beautiful eyes of yours, aren't you?"

He laughs on cue, desperate to turn this exchange into one he has with his audience, "My, what gave me away? My luscious locks, perhaps? Or would that be my lustful lips? I received rave reviews on my use of them. Would you like to try for yourself?"

Tav smiles. She looks at him openly, without blushing, without twitching, neither sultry nor loathing, accepting his words like an act that they are.

Astarion can barely keep his flirtatious mask without it cracking.

"As tempting as this offer is, afraid I've to restrain myself," she sighs, the tone of her voice aligning to his. She's also performing her part, and he knows that with certainty. "My compact size does not allow me thread deep waters without caution."

And your waters, Astarion, run very deep indeed.

She doesn't say this out loud, but he can infer the meaning from other places.

"Oh, come on, I'm hardly deeper than a puddle," he quips back. "You'll be perfectly fine sloshing through. As long as you don't mind being messy."

"Will I?"

He's still unable to see his reflection, but the feeling of being seen doesn't go away. She looks at him, through him, but not past him, right into his skull, right into his soul, and a part of him wants to curl himself in a ball to hide from this deep penetrating stare of hers.

Thankfully, Tav turns away before he's forced to do that. Or gouge out her wise all-knowing eyes, completely ill-fit for someone oh-so-young.

"Goodnight, Astarion."

He doesn't ask for a goodnight sip this time, just says something fitting without thinking much about it.

The feeling of her gaze lingers, it crawls under his skin, making all his hairs stand on end.

He doesn't like it.

And yet the shudder runs through him from just a fleeting picture of those eyes prying him open and reading through him with same acute attention that's reserved exclusively for her books. A frightened one, yes. But simultaneously full of excitement.

He does not like it.

Not one bit.

Not at all.

[jmdbjk]

Stuck With U

Ok my brain unglitched.

This song, "Stuck With U" was released in 2020. A male/female duet. I'm not an Ariana or Justin Beiber fan and I can promise you I've never paid attention to this song. When I watched, completely mesmerized, as Jimin flowed through this dance choreography, I had no idea this was a 2020 song. I wasn't even paying attention to it, he had me hypnotized.

But nothing is a coincidence with Jimin.

Earlier today, I was talking to my bestie and said that today's #ThisIsJimin clip was 2019 Jimin, only older and wiser.

And then to realize this is a 2020 song...

He went back to rediscover himself at a time when he felt he had the world in his hands.

Lyrics as he begins laying face down:

I'm stuck with you, stuck with you, stuck with you, baby

Perhaps self-reflection, the thrumming of the fingers in contemplation, waking up, his hand comes to life and starts reaching out beyond his prone self, tapping his knee to activate it.

There's nowhere we need to be No, no, no I'ma get to know you better Kinda hope we're here forever There's nobody on these streets If you told me that the world's ending Ain't no other way that I could spend it

He has no choice, doesn't matter what's going on around him, he has to let his art come to life. So he awakens it bit by bit, pulling each piece back to him.

Oh, oh, oh, oh Got all this time in my hands Might as well cancel our plans (yeah) I could stay here forever

A surge of movement and motivation as he revels in his happy place:

So lock the door And throw out the key Can't fight this no more It's just you and me

Summoning all the parts of his essence to come back to him and then he embraces them to himself (the joy on his face!!!):

And there's nothing I, nothing I, I can do I'm stuck with you, stuck with you, stuck with you So go ahead and drive me insane

Reaching out and pulling his hands back to his body as if capturing piece by piece and bringing his essence back to his soul and making his heart beat fully.

Baby, run your mouth I still wouldn't change being stuck with you Stuck with you, stuck with you I'm stuck with you, stuck with you, stuck with you

Finally reaching above his head and pulling his fist back to his chest and laying down in relief, arms open, face to the sky.

It's an expression of rediscovering dance as the center of who he is. Rediscovering, re-embracing himself through dance.

He is constantly wanting to show us different sides of himself and there was a point in time (2019-2020) when he was mid-thought and everything had to stop.

He is now pulled all of that back to him. I'm so excited for him and whatever he is about to show us in his new work, whenever that may be.

Anyway... sometimes I think too much. It's just Jimin being Jimin. I'LL TAKE IT AND LOVE IT!

[pookietv]

the not-so-useless hotline | george clarke

this has been rotting in my drafts for a while but it was a req so i hope you enjoy! may be a little sucky, sorry about that :)

dedicated to both the nonnie who requested and the nonnie who was adorable to me in dms so!!!!

to be honest, you didn't even really know what you had become well known for.

you started on youtube, ended up singing and modelling and vlogging and god knows what else, and you were a little bit of a mystery to the world.

but, nonetheless you had become adored by the internet, and eventually dragged on a podcast by max, who you had met on a brand trip and had grown to quite like, even if you had only seen him a handful of times.

so when you showed up to a little office with worn out computers and a smile on max's face, it did make you giggle to be on the set that you had seen him, and george, who even though you had seen him a lot online, you admittedly knew next to nothing about.

"y/n! hello, welcome!" you were invited in by who you assumed was a manager, who helped you get microphoned up, staying quiet whilst you listened to max and george speak and introduce the podcast whilst you waited on the sidelines for being introduced.

so when you heard the, "okay, send her up for the interview!" and you sat opposite them, your cheeks were a little red from laughing as it felt strange to be sat opposite them in such a corporate setting, even if was all a big joke.

"welcome y/n to your interview at the useless hotline! i'm max, this is george, very important interview today," max joked, and you nodded a little more, laughing and repeating, "very important, yes."

"yeah, i'm so glad to be here, i really need this job!" you joked back, allowing yourself to have a moment looking at george, being your first proper time meeting him. he was quite attractive, put together nicely.

"well, we have very high standards here, although max doesn't reflect that too well," george joked back, and you nodded in a teasingly solemn look.

"well, every company has it's stinker, and i suppose here it's max," you smiled, and max rolled his eyes.

"you bitch! haven't even introduced yourself and you're already mocking me," max grinned.

"oh, sorry, i introduce myself and then mock you?" you teased back.

after being made to make max and george extremely potent alcoholic drinks, and introducing yourself, with a little gossip about music and max's social life, eventually you get questions thrown your way.

"well, we figured we need to talk to you about your dating life, 'cause that's where our clickbait will be," george joked.

"literally! everyone knows you as some maneating mysterious woman going on dates all the time, and we're nosy," max teased, and you rolled your eyes in response.

"i'm not a maneater! jesus, you leave a bad impression max! i would just say i am very picky, that's all. y'know, high standards." you hummed a little as you drank your drink with a small grin.

"oh, come on, you know yourself there has been a cast of rotating rumours of people that the internet thought you might be dating," max urged, and you shrugged a little. "plus, when we went on that bar thing on the latest brand trip you told me about a few of them, so there must be some drama there!" he joked a little more.

"men are just very disappointing creatures, you know? there just hasn't really been one where i've been like, yeah, this person is fun to be around and i would like to be around them a lot of the time, so i'm still single!" i explained with a giggle.

"george is literally always saying something of a similar tune, he is kind of just a picky man," max joked a little, and i grinned and raised my eyebrows at george.

"picky, hm? i suppose i'm a little picky, but i don't think that's necessarily bad, i just think i would love to hold out for someone who is really for me, you know?" i asked him curiously.

"i wouldn't even say i'm picky, i just think... there's a kind of thing, where i'll, you know, find someone where i'm just like, yeah, this feels right," george explained, and i nodded.

"so do you have like.. a type?" max asked me, "george's type always seems to be women who don't like him back." max teased.

"there have definitely been some stinkers in the past but... i mean, i wouldn't even say i have a type, really. i like funny people, and i'd like someone that's taller then me... um, i guess i like facial hair but that's not a dealbreaker if not," i laughed a little awkwardly with a shrug of my shoulders.

"well, i'd say you'd like george but he is exceptionally not funny," max grinned to himself and i rolled my eyes in a giggly way, watching george turn to max.

"because you're just so witty yourself, max,"

the podcast continued, with topics only getting more intrusive and unhinged as we continued, before we got to the point where we were answering asks, and one came up asking george on a date as a plus one to a wedding.

"fuck you! see, everyone comes on the podcast and thirsts over george, but what if you had asked me? i would actually have shown up, how about that!" max huffed whilst george tried not to laugh.

"what, people try and hit on george through the podcast?" you asked, laughing myself.

"yeah, they do, his name is max balegde," george joked.

"they're really scraping the bottom of the barrel if they want george," max grinned, before looking at me, "do you get a lot of the whole randomers asking you out thing? seeing as you're so thirsted over on the internet?"

"i mean, i suppose so, but i don't read too many of them, they just stay in the requests bit of my messages so i don't pay them too much attention," you giggled slightly, shrugging, "though, i do appreciate the compliments, sometimes if i'm just having a really crap day i'll just look through edits of myself. is that narcissistic? maybe it is, but it does make you feel good,"

"max was begging people to make edits of him on one of the podcast episodes so i'm sure you're not too bad," george grinned to you, and you tittered a little at his answer, grinning back at him.

george was pretty attractive, actually.

it had been about a week since the episode of you on the useless hotline had come out: and to say you had been bombarded would be an understatement.

from shipping fan edits to insane tweets, there seemed to be a common theme, the theory that you were dating george.

he had texted you a little, talking about when the podcast was going to come out, and asking you if you had any plans over the weekend, mainly casual talk as he told you funny stories about his roommates, arthur and chris, and occasionally sending you photos of himself pulling faces.

liked by max_balegde, georgeclarkeey and 12,039 others

yourusername: my roommate tried to push me out of a window (but i made her take cute pictures so)

miaxmon: shut up i did not push you!

↳ yourusername: @/miaxmon whatever you say PUSHER

userone: since WHEN did she live with mia ???

↳ yourusername: since she begged me to live with her bc im awesome and sexy and she couldn't live without me (but actually for about six months!)

georgeclarkeey: she should have finished the job

↳ yourusername: smh silly george if she pushed me out the window then who else would the internet ship you with???

↳ georgeclarkeey: someone tolerable hopefully

↳ yourusername: i can see why you got stood up now

you have a new message from @/georgeclarkeey!

georgeclarkeey: now that was just cruel and uncalled for

yourusername: it was honesty which girl would show up for a date with you ???

georgeclarkeey: you hopefully

yourusername: you what???

georgeclarkeey: would you show up on a date with me?

yourusername: only if you said sorry for wanting mia to finish me off and that i am the best :)

georgeclarkeey: i just audibly sighed

georgeclarkeey: you are the best and i am sorry for saying i wanted mia to finish the job

georgeclarkeey: happy?

yourusername: absolutely

yourusername: so, a date?

georgeclarkeey: i was thinking a really tall building with loads of open windows. thoughts?

yourusername: you're sooooo funny george

georgeclarkeey: i know i know i'm hilarious

georgeclarkeey: i was actually thinking we could go to flight club and play darts

yourusername: i will beat you SO bad

georgeclarkeey: can't wait :)

yourusername: anyway, i thought you were really picky about who you go on dates with?

georgeclarkeey: i usually am

georgeclarkeey: i guess you just feel right

yourusername: are you this soppy with all your dates?

georgeclarkeey: well they usually don't show up so you'll be the first, obviously

georgeclarkeey: anyway i thought you were picky as well?

yourusername: okay shut up now george :)

[zentraex]

Remember: English grammar is a lot different than German grammar. I apologize for any mistakes.

Trigger warnings: yandere, kinda forced relationship

Pairings: Yandere! Bakugou x f! Reader

False Hopes

It was a typical autumn day. The green leaves have changed color: yellow, orange, red and dry brittle brown. One by one, they leave the tree, leaving it naked and bare. The sun starts to disappear behind the horizon, behind the thickening clouds, showing the world its last rays of sunshine for the slowly ending day. 

She also says goodbye to the couple, who are enjoying a date at the young man's house. 

"I have to admit, I'm surprised. When you told me to come, I didn't expect anything like this. Especially not from you," she says, a sly grin on her lips. 

He copies her grin as he speaks, "It wouldn't be a surprise if you could have guessed it."

"True, True," she says and sits down. The covered table is bursting with romance. Romance that she only knows from books. 

Who would have thought that she would be one of the lucky ones to get such a dream come true?

"Do you like it?" he asks, his eyes reflecting a hint of nervousness. Hers are sparkling, looking directly into his, seeing right through him.

"Who knows?" she teases him. However, he can see right through them as well and reads the actual answer from her eyes.  

His heart beats faster, drops of sweat run down his forehead, and his foot hurriedly taps the ground. His gaze drifts to his plate. Each time, she triggers these overwhelming feelings in him.

From the first time he saw her, the first time he spoke to her, and the first time he touched her. 

At first, he hated this attraction and these new feelings, but now he finds himself thirsting for more and more of it... demanding.

He wants more, needs more.

Not seeing her makes him starve.

His gaze wanders back to her.

Ba-dum

Ba-dum

Ba-dum

Should he dare? 

She feels the same, why should she object to that?

The sun has now been swallowed up by grey clouds. A light drizzle patters against the window.

"Bakugou..."

"Huh?"

"What are we to each other?"

He raises an eyebrow, leans back, and crosses his arms. 

"What do you mean?"

"Well, what's our relationship status? We always do so much together and I feel like there's more to it than just friendship."

Oh.

Friendship?

He laughs. 

"Friendship? You saw us as friends?"

Her gaze becomes uncertain, her smile fades. 

"All the dates, this here... Did you really think I would do this for simple friends?"

"No, but-"

He gets up abruptly, interrupting her.

In the meantime, the rain has become stronger and the heavy drops clank loudly against the window.

"You're my girlfriend, of course," he says, walking up to her. 

Her body tenses as he stands directly in front of her seated form. He looks terrifying, gives her a feeling of...

Fear.

Fear? From Bakugou? Her crush? 

Her heart beats faster, drops of sweat run down her forehead, and her foot hurriedly taps the ground. Her gaze drifts to her plate. 

Ba-dum

Ba-dum

Ba-dum

The food is cold. 

"Look at me!" he says, his voice deep, vibrating with anger and disappointment. She flinches, looks at him slowly. He sees her fear.

"You're my girlfriend," he repeats. "Whether you like it or not." 

Her mouth opens.

...

But nothing comes out of it.

His hand moves in her direction. She leans away, falls, but supports herself in time. 

With trembling legs, she stands up and both stare at each other. 

BA-DUM

BA-DUM

 BA-DUM It's instinct that she runs away. She didn't even think about it. From the living room into the narrow hallway. 

He follows her, slowly.

She grasps the door handle and pushes it down. 

There is lightning, then thunder. Outside, there is a strong storm. 

Yes, things like her dreams only exist in books. 

[delulu4anime]

Pairings: Illumi x fem!reader

Word count: 5.2k+

Warnings: Breeding (Lol it’s Illumi, it would be against the law not to add a breeding kink), mating press, PIV, slow burn, brief mentions of death (Illumi eventually shows you his crazy side), time skips. Please let me know if I missed anything.

A/N: MINORS DO NOT INTERACT FOR THE LOVE OF HADES. I started rewatching hunter x hunter and I forgot how much I adore Illumi. This man has me on my knees so quickly even tho he is TOXIC. Stayed up till 8 am writing this story about this sexy bug eyed man cause he deserves it. Yet another fan fiction where I listened to a song and went oh shit it’s this character. Not proof read. Enjoy!

Currently listening to: In the Middle of the night by Ellen Duhé- “I’m getting what is mine, you gon get yours.”

•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

You took a deep breath as you stared at your reflection in the bathroom mirror. The bags under your eyes indicated that you had gone a few days with little to no sleep. You couldn't remember the last time you got a good nights rest especially with the impending occasion coming up. There was a light knock at the door and with the turn of the knob your door was opened. Your mother cheerfully walked into the bathroom all dressed up for tonight's dinner. Your eyes drifted to your room which had been disturbed with the evening sunlight pouring, curtains you could've sworn were closed before you dragged yourself in here.

"Darling you really should open those curtains more often. It feels like a morgue every time I come in here," She huffed out.

Ah, so she took it upon herself to open them.

"I brought the necklace I wore on the night of my engagement dinner." She said turning her attention to the dark blue velvet box, setting it gently on the counter.

She quickly frowned upon seeing the state you were in.

"Why haven't you gotten ready yet? You don't look at all delighted; you know how important this dinner is tonight! We've waited twenty years for-"

"I know mother." You quickly said trying to save yourself from the lecture that would no doubt make your family late to the dinner if she rambled on.

You met her strict gaze in the mirror and mumbled an apology as you tucked a strand of hair behind your ear. Her face softened as she walked over to you; her hands finding their way to your shoulders.

"Please try to understand this will make both our families stronger. You were practically raised as a Zoldyck, but we need it to be official." Your mother said as you looked at her reflection in the mirror.

"I grew and trained with Milluki," You said as you shrugged her hands off your shoulders. "Shouldn't I be marrying him instead? I know nothing about Illumi."

You watched in the reflection the way your mother rolled her eyes clearly displeased with your response.

"You are well aware of our agreement that the eldest daughter goes to the eldest Zoldyck son. Honestly darling you act as if this is the end of the world? Your father and I knew nothing about one another and we turned out just fine. Now please get ready, we wouldn't want to keep your husband to be waiting anymore than he already has!" She exclaimed as she made her way out of the bathroom.

You knew that your parents had an arranged marriage like their parents before them. You've lost count of the times your mother would tell you stories about how your father wasn't who she chose to marry but that didn't mean that he didn't eventually become the love of her life. They built an entire life together which lead to the successful artillery business they ran and you. You knew the ties your family had with the Zoldyck's had been strictly business but now that you were of age it meant that bond would be taken from business to family. No matter what your parents told you this was nothing but another business deal to you.

You hadn't always dreaded being married to the oldest of the famous assassins. In fact you recall on several occasions Milluki teasing you for getting lost in thought and scribbling Illumi's name over and over again when you should've been studying up on jobs you'd taken on. However, despite training day and night with Milluki for years you had only laid your eyes on Illumi twice. You were around nine years old when you saw him for the first time. You and Milluki were were practicing ren when Illumi came home from a successful training mission at Heaven's Arena.

You couldn't take your eyes off the way he moved so effortlessly; you punched Milluki for teasing you for staring at his brother for longer than needed. The second time you finally came face to face with Illumi at the age of thirteen. You had learned you were a transmitter with your speciality being in poisons. Although you had successful learned how to use nen Silva knew you had a long way to go before you'd be able to use it flawlessly. He wanted to teach you the important lesson on when to back down from an opponent where success wasn't guaranteed.

You knew Illumi was stronger than you and Milluki combined but you refused to let him believe you were weak. After all you had been training day and night with all the toxins you could get your hands on. You cringed at the memory of Illumi looking down at your defeated body, you groaned as you held onto your side only to look up to meet his emotionless eyes.

"This is all you've been able to accomplish? You are the weakest out of us all. You won't be much use to me when we marry. Train harder or I'll kill you." He said flatly as you watched him turn to walk away not missing the way your heart skipped a beat.

You made a promise to yourself then to get stronger even though you didn't have much of a choice. Not only would you be a disgrace to your family but you'd pay for it with your life. Now at the age of twenty it had been seven years since you had seen Illumi and you dreaded it. You didn't trust your mind or your body around him; all logically thinking out the window when he was near. Although you'd gotten stronger and the training you completed with Mulluki had paid off part of you felt you'd never be enough for Illumi.

Not smart enough.

Not strong enough.

Not pretty enough.

You rolled your eyes knowing you were stalling at this point because this engagement was going to happen whether you liked it or not. And with that you started to get ready for the dinner with your future husband and family in law. Once you showered you wrapped a towel around yourself, walking back to your mirror to quickly do your makeup and hair. You carefully put on your black octavia dress, making sure not to ruin your work. You opened the box your mother had left behind and ran your fingertips over the smooth texture of the pearls. You removed the necklace and put it on yourself. The cool pearls making contact with your warm skin caused you to shiver.

Here goes nothing.

The flight to Kukuroo Mountain was about an hour long; you stared out the window as your parent's reminded you to be on your best behavior as if you were a child. You knew what the Zoldyck's expected of you so you chose to nod every once in a while as if you are paying attention, to give your parents the peace of mind. Before you knew it you had arrived to the testing gate and passed through it with ease. You reached your hand out to pet Mike as he bent down to receive your affection. You and your parents made your way up to the butlers quarters where they escorted you to the Zoldyck mansion. The memories seemed to flood back once you set foot inside. From all the times you ran up and down the halls playing hide and seek with Killua to nagging Milluki to get out of his room for once and train with you. You couldn't help but genuinely smile as you passed by the many portraits of the Zolydck family on the way to the banquet hall. Your parents pointing out the few paintings you were in when you were younger, voicing their joy about how tonight would officially make you apart of the family. As tradition you were seated at the end of the elegant dinning table; you ran your fingertips over the fine wood as you looked to see those around you. Your parents sat to the left of you while the Zoldyck's sat at the right. You sheepishly waved at Milluki who scoffed at you and looked else where. You couldn't help but pout at your childhood friend. Silvia took notice and leaned closer to you.

"He envy's Illumi." He said.

You paused for a moment then looked back at Milluki with wide eyes. Jealous of Illumi? For being engaged to you? You shook your head at the thought of the hidden feelings Milluki had for you.

"He shouldn't." You mumble as you look over to the empty seat next to you.

"Of all the day's to be late!" Kikyo hissed.

The butlers began bringing out courses of the meal out. You were able to start eating when you felt a presence causing you to look to your left towards a door leading into the banquet hall. That's when you saw him. You felt yourself exhale a shaky breath as he made his way over to you. His hair was much longer than the last time you had seen him, he'd gotten taller, and more toned. Yet his dark eyes remained the same and they watched you just as closely.

"Y/n." Illumi spoke as he took his place next to you.

You were at a lost for words as Kikyo chimed in.

"You're late! You left your bride to be waiting!" She exclaimed only to cause Silva to raise his hand to calm his wife down.

Silvia suddenly rose from his seat and cleared his throat. He had prepared a speech about the agreement of a proposal to the two oldest of each family. Illumi stood at one point as his father continued on; he grabbed your hand which caught you off guard. You felt Illumi's cold fingertips slowly slide a sliver band on to your ring finger. You gazed up at Illumi as he held on to your hand a little longer before letting go and returning to his seat. You were going to officially be a Zoldyck. The rest of the evening was filled with your parents talking with the Zoldyck's about planning the wedding and future business deals. But once your mother uttered the word grandchild you couldn't help but start choking on the glass of water you had been drinking. Everyone turned their gaze to you as you coughed; Illumi wrapped his arms around you and helped you stand.

"Excuse us." He said as you both walked out of the banquet hall.

You managed to calm yourself down once you were away from the judgmental stare your parents were giving you.

"I'm fine Illumi," You said as you realized you were still walking so closely to one another. "Really I am. We can go back." You said as you broke out of Illumi’s grasp.

"Would you not like to take a walk with me?" He suddenly said.

"Sure." You finally said after hesitating for a moment.

You walked in silence down the hall and out a door that led you into the courtyard. You took a deep breath of fresh air and slowly exhaled. You looked up at the night sky that glistened with millions of stars. You both stayed silent as the creatures of dusk seemed to come to life; chirping and croaking around you.

"May I ask you something?" Illumi finally said.

"Of course." You said.

"Are you uncomfortable around me?" He asked which made you look over at him.

"Well," You hesitated as you started to fiddle with your ring. "It's been seven years since the last time I saw you Illumi. We haven't spoke much these past few years and you just slide a ring on my finger just an hour ago signifying that we are to be married."

He looked over at you and cocked his head to the side.

"It isn't a surprise to you is it? We've been arranged to get married since you were born." He said plainly as if he were talking about the weather or what he had for breakfast.

"I guess what I'm trying to say is that it all happened so fast," You bite your lip knowing you couldn't hold back what you had been wanting to say since you saw him this evening "It's nice to see you again Illumi."

He hummed and stepped closer to you; his fingertips brushing a piece of hair behind your ear.

"You've grown up." He said, rubbing his hand lightly against your cheek. "You're quite beautiful and not nearly as annoying as you used to be."

You groaned and pushed his hand away from you as if he was nuisance yet your face heating up said otherwise.

"Way to ruin the moment." You huffed out.

"I can tell you've gotten stronger as well." He said and you nodded your head.

"I've been training hard. There's no shortage of poisonous plants to learn from." You said.

Silence fell between you again yet this time it wasn't uncomfortable. You felt yourself relax as the tension slowly slip away.

"You're more sure of yourself now." He said abruptly.

You paused to think back to all the long training sessions you endured, the painful limits you pushed your body to, and the long nights you'd longed to see Illumi and prove to him that you weren't the weakest.

"I just want to be a good wife for you." You said. "This may be an arranged marriage but I hope along the way you can see me as more than a business deal."

You watch as Illumi picked up your left hand and place a soft kiss onto the silver ring he had placed on your hand earlier. His warm lips were a significant contrast to his cold fingers that held onto your hand. You let go of a breath you didn't even know you were holding watching how gentle he was being with you.

"I've waited for so long to see this ring on your finger. You'll make a fine wife." Illumi said softly.

••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

It had been a month since the engagement became official and you felt like it was all just a fever dream. You hadn't seen Illumi since the night of the dinner and you couldn't help that sinking feeling that had followed you for so many years; was he distancing himself from you again? You couldn't even get your mind off things because the mother's on both sides insisted that the wedding happen immediately. Which also meant your mother forbidding you for taking on any jobs to help with planning; the lack of work and his absence caused your mind to stir. You were in your old room at the Zoldyck mansion, gazing at your reflection as a few maids fixed the long train of the dress your mother surprised you with. You nervously played with the ring on your finger as your eyes traveled to the intricate pattern in the lace, there was something so familiar about the dress but you couldn't exactly pin point what. Your eyes traveled to the tall window that was in the corner of the room where your mother and Kikyo sat at a small table drinking tea. The same table you sat at countless nights looking out into the courtyard yearning for Illumi to come home to you. The maids stepped to the side as you turned to face them, you placing your arms behind your back. You watched as your mother's eyes watered as she stood from her chair and made her way to you.

"What do you think my dear?" Kikyo smiling before taking a sip of her tea.

"It's beautiful." You say as you brought your hands to your sides to run your fingertips over the fabric.

"This use to be my dress,' Your mother said as she grabbed hold of your hands. "And it fits you wonderfully!"

You turned to look at yourself in the mirror once again feeling like a fool for not recognize the dress immediately. Your mother had shown you endless photos of her wedding day and the dress was the focal point of every photo.

"This means so much to me. Thank you mother." You said and smiled at her reflection in the mirror.

"I have a gift for you too my dear." Kikyo said as she made her way over to you.

You turned to see her holding a beautiful silver necklace with a small blue gem dangling from the center. You leaned down as Kikyo placed it around your neck.

"I wore this on my wedding day. A good luck charge from your mother and I." She said as she stood back with your mother to admire you.

You ran your finger tips over the necklace and smiled.

"This is perfect. Thank you both." You said.

The next few hours were spent sitting at the table listening to the two women bicker on who to invite to the wedding of the century they called it. You rolled your eyes and looked over to your door as you watched Milluki walk down the hall looking down at his phone. You excused yourself from the table which was useless because they were both stuck in their own world of wedding planning. You quickly made your way out of the room and chased after Milluki down the hall.

"Hey Luki wait up!" You shouted after him which only caused him to turn around quickly. The irritated look you knew all too well.

"I said stop calling me that stupid nickname." He sneered as he looked down at his phone once again.

You couldn't help but giggle as you followed him into his room. You leaned against the doorway as you watched him walk over to his desk; your eyes widening at the amount of computers that were turned on, each with something different flashing on each screen.

"So what have you been up to?" You ask as you walked over as you looked over at his figurine collection.

"Killua is asking for a favor," He grumbled as he looked up to one of his monitors. "He needs a copy of Greed Island."

"The rare video game?" You questioned as you looked over his shoulder to the screen which caused him to chuckle.

"Papa always said you were too smart for your own good." He said as he looked over his shoulder.

"Smarter than you for sure." You teased.

"Shut up!' He yelled as he turned back to his computer typing away vigorously.

The only thing that filled the room was Milluki's fingertips against his keyboard as he looked into getting more information on the legendary Greed Island for his younger brother. You had wondered what Killua had been up to since leaving to go take the hunter exam; you hadn't been around when he lashed out Milluki and Kiyko but you couldn't help the chuckle you let out when you found out. Being under the same pressure from your families it was inevitable for you and Killua to become close.

"You don't seem too thrilled to be getting married." Milluki suddenly said bringing you out of your thoughts.

"What makes you say that?" You say flatly.

"Your eyes don't light up the same way they use to when anyone mentioned Illumi." He replied, looking between two monitors.

"It's just a lot to take in," You sigh out. "I went from being a kid learning how to become an assassin like the Zoldyck's to becoming an actually Zoldyck by marriage.   It's hard being in love with someone sees this as nothing more than a business deal"

Milluki stopped typing to turn to face you again; that irritated looking back in his face.

"You really are stupid aren't you? He may have never said it when you were around but he's made several remarks about you to me. It sickening how he only seems to care about his jobs and you." He turned his chair completely around.

You couldn't help but laugh at the confession, searching in his eyes for the truth. Your smile faded as he stared right back at you and you knew that look all too well.

"Now get out cause I have work to do." He said as he turned back to his work and dismissed you with a wave of his hand.

You hesitated only for a moment then walked out of his room; you turned and looked to see Milluki talking on his phone to Killua if you had to guess.

"Thank you Luki." You whisper to yourself and with that you took your leave.

Before you knew it the evening turned into night fall and Kikyo was pleading for you to stay, trying to reassure you that Illumi would be back soon. You agreed thinking back to what Milluki had said earlier. After saying your goodbyes to your mother you returned to your room to find the maids making your bed and bringing a few of your belongings you had left here when you traveled between your home and the Zoldyck's. You thanked the maids as they bowed and left the room. You let out a long sigh as you threw yourself onto the bed as you listened to the clock on the wall tick away the minutes wondering when Illumi would be home; your hand brushed over the fabric of your t-shirt around your stomach as the butterflies seemed to dance around gleefully. Here you were again waiting and yearning for Illumi; aching for his gaze, his touch, and his words to overwhelming your senses. You sat up quickly at the idea of a game; a game that you dominated when you played with Milluki. Assassin 101: tracking and locating your target. If Illumi wanted you as much as Milluki said he did then prove it. Game on.

••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

You sighed, rubbing the soreness out of you neck, and clocked out for the day. It had been a year since you left everything behind to test Illumi; what better way to prove his worth than a game of hide and seek. If he successfully found you then Milluki was right and you'd happily go through with the wedding, if he didn't seek you out then you had a fresh start to live your life free of the expectations of everyone. You had gotten an office job which was quite an adjustment from what you had been trained to do originally. However, doing work as an assassin didn't require long hours behind a desk staring at a monitor.

You lost count of how many times you had to stay overtime to finish a team project. It was finally Friday which meant your coworkers attempting to get you to go out to a local bar but you yet again declined their invite and opted for a another night in with dinner from the convenient store. Your heels clicked against the concrete, a breeze hit your skin causing you to shiver. You walked faster, holding onto your paper bag tightly and cursing yourself for forgetting your sweater back at the office. Luckily the convince store wasn't a far walk from the apartment.

Going into hiding meant getting a new identity and with a new life meant new struggles; applying for jobs and apartments with no credit or job history under the new identity proved to be a challenge but you came out victorious in the end. You walked up the flight of steps to your apartment; you smiled and greeted your elderly neighbor as you put your keys in the lock. You promised to go visit her soon to keep her company while she ate dinner and watched her weekly tv drama. You walked in as you told her goodnight, closing the door behind you with your foot, and reached over to turn on the lamp that sat on a side table. You tossed your keys along with your heels haphazardly on the table and floor.

You walked through your small living room that connected to your kitchen. You set your bag on the counter and putting your food to the side. You suddenly froze in place as an uneasy feeling came over you; you could recognize that blood lust from anywhere. You slowly turned to Illumi standing in your living room playing with one of his many nen needles in his hand. His lips slowly curved into a smile that you had never seen grace his face before.

"So this is where you've been hiding all this time," He said as he started to walk over to where you were. "I'll give you credit this is just inconspicuous enough to make it hard to track you. Not to mention using zetsu to conceal your presence." He chuckled to himself.

You braced yourself against the counter as he stood in front of you. He grabbed your face with one hand as he lightly pressed his needle against your throat with the other.

"You actually found me?" You asked dumbfounded which only made him scoff. He actually came looking for you, and you welcomed the butterflies that swarmed in your stomach.

"Do you know how many people I had to kill just to see you again?" He asked as he leaned in close enough for your lips to graze one another's.

"It took you long enough." You breathed as you looked into his eyes.

He cocked his head to the side as if he was confused but you could tell by the rest of his body language that this little hunt excited him. He removed his nen needle from your neck and took a step back. Silence fell between you both as the tension grew. You could have sworn Illumi could hear your heart beating out of your chest from where he stood. Here he was after a year of being apart and better yet he sought you out. Without thinking you grabbed onto Illumi and crashed your lips against his. He immediately moved his hands to your hips, his grip would leave bruises no doubt but you didn't care. Without breaking the kiss he lifted you onto the counter, his hands leaving your waist for a brief moment to wondered up to your blouse; he ripped it open effortlessly as the buttons flew off hitting the counter beside you or the floor. He started to kiss his way down your jaw to your neck causing you to sigh. You felt his hands slowly move back to your waist, pushing your skirt up, as he started to place open mouth kisses on your neck. You let out a soft moan as he found your sweet spot close to your ear.

"Drove me crazy looking for you." He breathed into your ear. "Hiding what was promised to me since birth."

"Needed proof you were serious about this. About us." You softly said as your fingers found their way to his hair.

"Proof? You needed proof that you're one of the only things that's been on my mind for years," he huffed out. "You and this." He said as he pulled your damp panties to the side and easily slid two fingers into your cunt.

He moved his fingers in and out of you agonizingly slow; you hated the way he teased you.

"Please Illumi." You whimpered out as he chuckled pulling his fingers out of you.

He stepped back to look at you, eyes darkening at you disheveled form. You hair in disarray, your blouse ruined just enough to show off that lace bra, and your skirt bunched up around your hips. He watched your chest rise and fall as you pant . This was what he had chased after. This is what he wanted, no needed. This was his wife. He smirked as he turned on his heel and made his way to your couch. Your eyes followed the way he gracefully sat down and spread his legs; he lifted his hand and motioned for you to come to him. You quickly got off the counter and made your way over to him but before you could touch him he stopped you.

"Strip." He said plainly.

You kept your eyes on him as you removed everything one by one till you stood in front of him naked. You wished you were embarrassed about being completely nude with eyes looking you up and down; his eyes looking at you like you were his prey. He leaned back into the couch and you stood in between his legs. He patted his lap and you couldn't help but let your eyes wonder to his crotch. His facial expression read as if he disinterested yet his cock straining against his pants said otherwise. You climbed on top of his lap and placed your hands on his shoulders. You felt his cold hands run over your sides and down to your hips once more giving a light squeeze; he chuckled at the gasp you let out. His hands moved away from your hips briefly as his hands made quick work of freeing his aching cock. You lifted your hips as he lined himself up to your entrance. You slowly lowered yourself down onto him, both letting out a moan as he bottomed out. His large hands moved back to your hips as you started to move up and down against him. You soon found your rhythm, closing your eyes taking in the feeling of his cock; he leaned up placing soft kisses against your neck.

"Fuck Illumi I've wanted this for so long." You moaned out.

Suddenly you were flipped onto your back as his hands moved under your thighs and pushed them to your chest. Without hesitating he started to pound into your pussy with hard, deep thrust. You let out a loud moan as your eyes rolled to the back; your hands grabbing onto the fabric of the couch to steady yourself.

"This is finally mine. All mine.' Illumi huffed out as he watched the way his cock bullied your pussy. "Isn't that right?"

"Yes." You managed to moan out as you felt yourself already nearing your climax.

"Going to give me the next Zoldyck heir like the good little wife you are." He said which caused your eyes to shoot open.

You watched as he moved one of his hands against your stomach putting pressure causing both of you to moan in sync.

"You're going to make me a father aren't you?" He said and you frantically nodded your head to cock drunk to object.

"Yes Illumi, please." You begged. "Want to be your good little wife."

You felt his fingertips travel to your clit and rub harsh circles as his hips continued on his brutal pace. You threw your head back and moaned Illumi's name as you reached your climax.

"What a good girl you are." Illumi cooed as his eyes traveled to the white ring around his cock.

With a few more sloppy thrust Illumi finished inside of you as you both panted. He pulled out of you and watched his cum slowly seeping out; he ran his slender fingertips along your slit just to shove his fingers inside you to keep it all inside.

"I'm taking you back home tonight. We are to be married tomorrow. We've kept each other waiting too long." He flatly said which caused you to laugh.

"Anything for my soon to be husband." You hummed.

[your-local-hollow-lover]

Nesting urges

Summary: After a talk with Nel about nesting instincts, you decide you'll make one for Grimmjow.

Fluff/reader has powers/gender-neutral reader

Hollows nest. The fact blew your mind the second it registered. But thinking about it calmly, it was tremendously funny. You couldn't picture someone like Grimmjow gathering small branches and crystals around Hueco Mundo without cracking up.

"But he's a cat, isn't he? So, what if he gathers yarn-like materials?" you put in excitedly as you walked through the white desert beside her. 

Nel chuckled. "It doesn't work that way. Besides, there's not much here that we can use."

She lowered her gaze, and you felt a pang of guilt. Nel was so easy to be around that you often forgot what she was. 

"What do you er- use? I mean, usually."

"It's different for each of us. Some low-ranked hollows make their nest by spitting a mix of bones, branches, and gastric juices. They gather everything together to make colonies with multiple tunnels." She said, trying to ignore the memory of Nnoitra annihilating one of those.

"What about the Espadas?" 

"The instinct remains, but we were lucky to evolve. I never heard of an Espada who nested."

"Because it would look weak, I presume?" you ventured.

Nel seemed to ponder, after which she explained that nesting in a place full of many potential threats wasn't exactly comfortable.

The Espadas were supposed to have a sense of companionship. Or so she heard Aizen say. However, given the times that Nnoitra tried to fight her, not to mention what he and Szayel did to her, Nel never thought about doing such a thing in Las Noches. And you guessed no other Espada either. 

"It must be awful to crave something you can't have."

"We're used to it."

"You shouldn't be," you whispered, but Nel didn't hear you.  She was busy waving to Pesche and Dondochaca, who eagerly greeted her back in the distance.

***-

Making a nest for Grimmjow could be the best way to give another step in your relationship with him, yet, at the same time, giving him something so personal could end abysmally wrong. The idea roamed your skull for days before you decided to give in.

According to Nel, the first thing on the list was to find a small place. You had the perfect one: a wardrobe spacious enough to fit him. Step two was decorations: You placed multiple layers of sheets, blankets, and quilts aside from a couple of jackets you stole from him. It wound up comfy enough to nap there. 

After all the hard work, you only needed to find the right way of presenting your gift to him.

***-

Grimmjow slammed the door open. His gaze darted across the room. Empty. He moved to check the next with a huff. Where the hell were you? The dead head outside Las Noches wouldn't last forever. 

Grimmjow didn't know when bringing you trophies of his hunts started to be a habit, but it didn't matter. Now he enjoyed bragging about his strength before you too much to consider stopping.

It seemed like yesterday when Aizen told him he was to guard you: a human with an ability to create untraceable portals between dimensions, typically by using mirrors or other reflecting surfaces as windows to see or pass through. A truly magnificent power to spy on his enemies, Aizen said. A pain in the ass, Grimmjow thought.  

The times he had to threaten you to refrain from escaping were too many to count. Despite that, you never matched his violent energy, nor did you return any of his insults. You were stupidly chill all the time; Obsessed with showing him cool things about the world of the living, and as it never failed to entertain him, Grimmjow wound up guiding you through the best parts of Hueco Mundo in return. Time flew when you were around, and Grimmjow felt something close to enjoyment in your company.

But fuck, even if now he didn't despise you, your power was still a pain in the ass. 

***-

You gasped at the familiar spiritual pressure approaching. Grimmjow was supposed to be out, hunting far deep into the desert. You shut the small door just when he kicked the room door open.

" 'The hell are you doing here?" he shot with a beyond annoyed tone.

"I- um, I was about to-”

"Who told you you could come back to the human world?" he interrupted.

"Come on. Aizen's not around anymore. I’m- free to come and go as I please,” you said while shrugging, smiling light-heartedly.

Grimmjow gazed down at you for a split second before turning his head. He chuffed. "So what if you are? You still need to open your damn mouth to give me a heads up." 

“Alright, I’ll keep it in mind,” you eased. 

He grimaced. "Move, we're going back."

He didn’t wait for a response. Grimmjow grabbed your wrist as he began pulling you forward. He didn't like it when you spent time in the human world. It could give you stupid ideas, like never returning to Hueco Mundo. 

“No, wait! I want to show you something!” 

Grimmjow was not  in the best mood for human stuff. His battle prize must have vanished. He wanted nothing more than to go back and bury himself deep in the sand. 

“I said we’re going back.” 

It didn’t matter how much you twisted, his grip was too strong to resist. Your feet slipped on the floor as he dragged you.

“Please, I made something for you.”

Grimmjow didn’t falter. 

“If you let me show you, I promise I’ll quit asking favors for a while!” 

He stopped. Grimmjow glanced at you over his shoulder. 

“I promise,” you reiterated.

"Fine," he said before letting go of you. Grimmjow stuffed his hands inside his pockets. He leaned his back over the wall. "Make it quick."

You nodded, turning to open the closet door. Grimmjow froze when the scent hit his nose. His gaze went crazy, darting from one spot to the other. What the hell did you do?

“I found out that this is important to hollows. I know I’m always giving you human stuff you don’t want, so I thought now I could try giving you a hollow thing. You don’t have to use it if you don’t want to.”

Damn, even when it was painfully evident that you were missing a fucking screw, you always managed to give him this revolting mix of unwanted feelings. It irked him.

You observed his reaction closely. A part of you expected wrath. At some point, you pictured a cruel scene where he destroyed it as the worst scenario. Yet, Grimmjow tensed. You resolved maybe it was too personal of a subject for you to be standing there watching. 

“Anyway. I’ll pack some things so we can go back.”

You only left the room for half a minute. When you came back, your stunned gaze froze over the scene: Grimmjow's body spread across the small nest you made for him, tummy showing, arms crossed under his head as one of his legs rested over the other one's knee.

"What are you looking at?" Grimmjow asked, his eyes stuck on the wardrobe's top. 

You grinned. "Nothing. Hmm, does this mean you like it?"

He scoffed. 

"This means I'm not giving you a reason to ask for weird shit for a while. So you better keep your word." Grimmjow stated. His face, however, entirely betrayed his words: his eyes were hooded as he breathed slowly. There was no trace of frowns.

You held your smile with a softened gaze. "I will. Hey, I have to run a couple of errands. We can return to Hueco Mundo when I'm done-" 

"No. It'll be a pain in the ass if I have to go looking for you again. Come," he pointed beside him. 

It took you aback. "To lay with you? I thought it'd be better if you had some privacy."

"Fuck that. I don't need it. If you make me do ridiculous shit, you won't be spared from having to partake. That way we'll be even, so shut up and come here."

Your heart throbbed. You had shared space before but never like this. Perhaps it was that Grimmjow wasn't comfortable having his corner in a place where it smelled so much like you. Or maybe this was just the hollow way of asking for cuddles.

Be that as it may, the prospect of sharing the nest with him made you tingle. 

 “Alright, since you ordered it,” you muttered.

Grimmjow pressed his back against the wall to make room next to him. You settled there, leaning your head hesitantly over his shoulder. His Hierro was down. You nuzzled into him, and he let you. The more he did this with you, the easier it turned to let his guard down, as stupid as it sounded.

Grimmjow brushed his mouth on your hair before taking a deep breath. You moved to meet his gaze. Deep, intense, filled with something you couldn’t place. Your fingertips moved to grace the scar over his chest, gently tracing it down near his tummy hole. He hooked your hand harshly.

"Watch it," he warned.

"I know. I won't stick my hand in, don't worry."

"Good, cuz' it'll get swallowed away."

"What?! Really?" 

The idea of your hand disappearing inside him startled you enough to try pushing him off you. Grimmjow let out a short, loud laugh. You gaped, frowning.

"Fuck you," 

Grimmjow settled his head comfortably over your head, nestling close to you, ignoring the part of him screaming he shouldn't be giving in to these weird pleasing sensations. To hell with that. This was what he wanted and what he wanted, he would take.

"Yeah, fuck you too."

[angelsdean]

DEAN Well, whatever. Something turned him into a monster. And you know if you woulda taken out the other one there'd be one less to worry about. SAM I'm sorry, all right? I hesitated, Dean, it was a kid! DEAN No, it was an "it". Not the best time for a bleeding heart, Sam.

Once again, random line at the start of the episode that on the surface level paints Dean as overly-callous, isn't actually abt the person they're talking about and is instead abt Dean's own internal turmoil over what John told Dean before he died, as is the thread throughout this entire episode (and the season at large) which will be made explicit by the end of the ep (and into the next) when dean finally reveals what John told him he'd have to do.

For weeks (months? -- how long has it been at this point) Dean has been grappling with the knowledge of what John wants him to do. He's trying to reconcile with it, trying to understand a world where he could follow through with John's request and actually kill Sam. We know from 2x03 Bloodlust that Dean's already started questioning John's brand of monster ethics. It's Dean, not Sam, at the end of that episode who reflects on the case and how that applies to their lives and their job and it's Dean who wonders how many monsters didn't actually deserve to die. Sam just sweeps it under the rug and gives John the benefit of the doubt, saying he was doing "the best he could," while Dean feels torn up about the whole thing. What John taught them is no longer enough, not when he's got Sam's life in his hands. Not when he has to determine when his own brother is past the point of saving. And the parallel storyline with Gordon and his sister shows us that Dean wouldn't be able to do the same.

Now, in 2x09, we see he's still grappling with this issue. When it comes to monster ethics on this show, it can get dicey. Both brothers flip-flop a lot, depending on the situation, sometimes they fall back on what John taught them, but they both also have their own separate codes they follow. John's brand of monster ethics was very much = a monster is a monster is a monster and shoot first ask questions later. Dean's brand of monster ethics is: a monster is someone (can even be human!) who preys on and kills innocent people. Sam generally I think believes this too, but! he is prone to sympathizing or not sympathizing with certain monsters depending on how he personally relates to them. Max in 1x14 got his full sympathy because Sam related to him and saw him as a victim, whereas Simon in 2x05 gets very little sympathy from Sam despite also being one of the Special Children because Sam is already convinced that he's the "bad guy."

Anyways, point is, while Dean does "shoot first" in the scene they're discussing above, he does it because he sees the man harming his wife. Hurting an innocent person = monster. He's also grappling with the Sam and John stuff. He's questioning his father's ethics but also wondering at what point will Sam stop being his brother if he were to "go darkside." So he's working out these feelings by talking about other people. "It was an 'it'. Not time for a bleeding heart" is more about him telling himself that, in my opinion. It's him trying to convince himself to not let his heart get in the way of his job. Because Dean cares so much. Because Dean is often thee bleeding heart being forced into impossible situations by the narrative. He's always letting himself be vulnerable to hurt and loss. And he knows IF it ever gets to the point where Sam is the thing that's hurting people, he'll still struggle to kill him. So he's telling himself now, letting John's "wisdom" speak through him, to not let his heart get in the way.

But we know, we know it's just words. Because later in this episode when they all think Sam is infected, he can't go through with it. Would rather die himself (and right the "wrong" of him even being alive in the first place) along with Sam than kill his own brother.

[purgatorygrl]

Analysis of why Sun Bleached Flies by Ethel Cain is so Arthur Morgan coded

Okaay so, this is an attempted analysis of the song Sun Bleached Flies by Ethel Cain and how for me it is so Arthur Morgan coded. It is also partly my interpretation of Arthur's story. I have not analyzed the whole song I have only put the paragraphs that I think are related to his story. I really recommend listening to the whole Preacher's Daughter album, specifically this song!!! It's quite a spiritual journey (there are also other songs on this album that are very Arthur coded but maybe I will do another analysis another time)

Sun bleached flies sitting in the windowsill

Waiting for the day they escape

They talk all about that money and how their babies are always changing

While they're breathing in the poison of the paint

For me this paragraph reflects how Arthur has been trapped in the band his whole life, waiting for the day they get the money that Dutch promises and can go with Mary to live the life he wants. Dutch is always talking about all the money they are going to get, all the plans he has and all the great things they will achieve over and over again but that never comes true. He always has to listen to Dutch talk and talk, always listening to him and never being able to contradict him, always nodding and obeying.

However, everything is getting worse and worse and little by little he sees how everything is falling apart around him and how he is further and further away from escaping.

What I wouldn't give to be in Church this Sunday

Listening to the choir, so heartfelt, all singing

God loves you, but not enough to save you

So, baby girl, good luck taking care of yourself

So I said fine, 'cause that's how my daddy raised me

God, this phrase... if you change God for Dutch you have everything, EVERYTHING. Dutch loves you but not enough to save you. Dutch loves his children, the whole gang, but at the end of the day, when things start to get bad, when he loses control, when he doesn't get what he wants, when people doubt him, he chooses someone else over his son, over his family and betrays them. And he betrays Arthur, he lets him die, he doesn't save him, he doesn't help him, he leaves him completely alone on the brink of death. And in the end Arthur is alone again, like when he was a child, like when his mother and father died. Alone, physically and emotionally.

If they strike once then you just hit 'em twice as hard

But in the end, if I bend under the weight that they gave me

Then this heart would break and fall as twice as far

Arthur knows that he has to fight, he has to fight now for what he wants to do, he is not going to let himself be defeated and he wants to try to leave this world having left the people he loves tools to continue their lives and try to be happy. So Arthur fights, fights until he can't anymore until all the weight of his life falls on him.

We all know how it goes

The more it hurts, the less it shows

I think that Arthur has carried many traumas and fears inside him all his life that few people know about, things that hurt him a lot that terrify him like the death of Eliza and Isaac. Everyone in the camp sees Arthur as a tough guy, the one who protects them, someone who doesn't hesitate to shoot or hit. I think a lot of people see him as someone without feelings or remorse but in reality he is drowning in fear and trauma, he just doesn't let it show.

And I spend my life watching it go by from the sidelines

And God, I've tried, but I think it's about time I put up a fight

He has ALWAYS listened to everything Dutch told him, he has always followed him, faithfully, he hasn't doubted him, he always had faith in him. Until it was impossible not to doubt him, until he realized that he didn't have time and that the little time he had he wanted to use to do what he wanted, what he knew he had to do. The fact that Arthur got tuberculosis is not only an important element since it is what kills him, but it is also the trigger for the beginning of the change in the world he knows and the fight between the person he was and the person he wanted to be.

But I always knew that in the end no one was coming to save me

So I just prayed and I keep praying and praying and praying

If it's meant to be then it will be

So I met him there and told him I believe

Singing if it's meant to be then it'll be

I forgive it all as it comes back to me (back to me)

He was meant to die and he knew it. He knew there wasn't much else to do. No one came to look for him on that hill as he died, he was there alone, wishing he had made other choices, wishing he had lived the life he wanted deep down, praying and praying but mostly fighting.

The chorus is an angelic part of the song, really. It's the fact that in the end everything he's been doing all his life will come back to him somehow, everything has a consequence and he tries to fix that, but in the end he doesn't have enough time to be able to fix it and in the end it all comes back to him and he pays for his "sins".

I'm still praying for that house in Nebraska

By the highway, out on the edge of town

Dancing with the windows open

I can't let go when something's broken

It's all I know and it's all I want now

And in the end, when he was dying, he still wanted that house with Mary, that dream of having a family that he never had, he wanted to be with her, to sort out his life and be able to run away and live a life of peace and happiness with those he loved the most, to stop being the man he had to be and become the one he wanted. But even though he always had the windows open to leave, to escape, he didn't do it, because it was all he had and it was all he knew.

[pencil-peach]

Thinking about Guel Jeturk (Pt 1)

He is such a cool character. He's such a genuine piece of shit and at the start of the show I really thought, even if he did change, that I wouldn't like him, but by the time the show ended I genuinely wanted for his happiness as much as every other character.

So I just wanna talk about him I guess

Cringe analysis under the cut awooo awooOOoooOooo

I think it's important that Guel starts off the show as just an actual shithead. He's just the misogynist bully archetype at its core and he treats Miorine like property and everyone else like they're beneath him, but it's also important to understand the context of that behavior too.

Guel has basically everything. Money, Prestige, Power, Respect. Everything has essentially been handed to him on a silver platter, and as long as he continues to win duels (the only thing he is actually, GENUINELY good at) that won't change. And with that comes an insane amount of pride and arrogance. He expects things to go his way because, for basically his entire life, that's just how things have always been. In the business world that he's been surrounded by, the strong always win out over the weak.

But with Suletta, all of the pride and respect that comes with his title and status is utterly and completely meaningless to her.

And he tries his classic shtick of listing out all of his titles on her, because in the world he lives in, that alone is what makes him worthy of either fear or respect.

But it doesn't work on Suletta, because the world of the Benerit Group is not the real world, the one she lives in. She repeatedly looks past all of his flashy titles and admonishes and judges him for his BEHAVIOR, the true merit of his character.

When she agrees to duel him, Guel sees it as putting an ignorant girl in her place. And why would he believe otherwise? He's always been on top at Asticassia, and this is no different. Dueling is the one thing that he KNOWS he's good at. It's the one skill that is definably his, that he truly earned through his own hard work. It's why he get so upset and defensive when Suletta looks down on him.

But the important thing here is that he LOSES to Suletta. BADLY.

And the lesson Guel is forced to learn from this loss is that every single thing he latched onto in his life, everything that he decided makes him worthy of respect and admiration, is not only immaterial, but, more importantly, conditional.

His pride and status, his role as heir of the Jeturk Company, and, most damning of all, his father's love, was based entirely on whether or not he was the current Holder at Asticassia.

Because he lost one duel, (the FIRST duel he had ever lost, mind you) a duel to a Gundam that, based on what we know, was quite literally unwinnable, Guel's father slaps him across the face and yells at him.

Before the rematch, when Guel is told that the Darilbalde is piloted by an AI, his father slaps him across the face AGAIN and tells him straight up that his feelings do not matter if he's not the Holder.

Which is why the scene where Suletta defends him from Secelia's taunts and explains her motto is so important

Everyone in Guel's life at this point, even his own father, looks down upon and mocks him for losing the duel. But Suletta isn't. She just tells him that even though he lost, he still deserves praise for not running away.

This is probably the first time in his life anyone has ever just told him that. That it's okay that he lost. That it's enough that he just tried.

Quick aside, but this moment here, when Suletta is talking about how much her mother means to her, and Guel holds his hand up to the cheek his father slaps him across hasn't, and will probably never, leave my brain.

But Suletta's words don't reflect Guel's reality. And the fact that he lost means even more is being taken from him, including his ability to even duel.

During the rematch, the Darilbalde doesn't even respond to his input. He, like Miorine, is having all of his decisions made for him, because without the title of holder, he's utterly powerless.

And the truly tragic thing here is that, once Guel smashes the AI and begins fighting on his own, he starts doing much better than when the AI was fighting and his father was cheating for him. He was genuinely a match for Permet 1 Aerial. But it's too late.

Maybe this is just me, but I always got the impression that if Guel was able to fight this battle on his own from the start, it would have been much more even, and he might have even won. But he didn't. He lost, again. And because of this, things are going to get much worse for him, really damn fast.

[taichoushadow]

Reflection | Yoo Taeyang (M)

A/N: a happy birthday to my sweet @yootaesowl 🤎 I hope this birthday present will end the day on a sweet, hot note for you as you deserve nothing but the love that's written below. Because you're that hot.

Summary: mirrors weren't you best friend. And they were never gonna be but there was one person that wasn't gonna hold back on showing you how beautiful and hot you are and that mirrors are nothing but lies projected by society's image that have been printed into people's minds.

Taeyang x plus size!reader

Wordcount: 4.9 K

Warnings: 18 +, sex, penetration, p in v, cum, unprotected sex, lies about beauty, truth about beauty. Do not read when under 18.

Mirrors. You despised them and avoided them at any cost you could. You didn't want to bring yourself down at the false image it portrayed. It's what you told yourself everytime you saw your own reflection. You knew the thoughts that swam through your mind whenever you glanced at yourself were lies that you told yourself, lies the world fed you since you were a child.

Gulping, you smoothed down the shirt you put on for the gala night Taeyang and you were invited to. A celebration for the start of what was surely to become a successful musical, with Taeyang playing the villain you knew it was a matter of time before he would be on stage even more than usual. You were happy for him, seeing the big smile on his face whenever he told you about the practices, animatically telling all about it. He even invited you to come watch some practices but you declined, wanting to witness it at the premier, seeing how it all came together. He smiled, kissed you but made you promise to come with him to the premiere. You scoffed at that, playfully offended that he would think you wouldn't come with him. You were his date after all, who else would, so you told him. With a loud laugh, he kissed you again and patted your hair. "Yes ma'am."

But now that the moment was here, having to stand on that red carpet leading to the musicals première, you felt your breath getting stuck in your throat, felt like your stomach was doing somersaults as you smoothed down your shirt once again, not liking how it sat on your body.

The pants suddenly felt a size to small while it looked to fall perfectly when you tried it on weeks before. Frustrated tears burned your eyes and you tried to blink them away, not wanting to fall in that mindset right before the big event but how could you ignore it when the thought of pictures being taken with you standing next to Taeyang.

You could already see the headlines, see the tweets being posted like you were nothing but a mere object to them that didn't have feelings. and so with a loud shout, you pulled off your shirt with maddening force, throwing it on the floor before giving it a good kick, as if that could help take away your self hatred. This time the tears were rolling down your cheeks, your whole body being filled with frustration and dejection that you couldn't have the confidence you so desperately wanted.

Taeyang who was getting you and himself something to eat before leaving, heard the commotion and decided to take a peak to see if everything was okay but his heart sank at the sight before him. You looked defeated, so small as you just stood there with tears streaming down your face.

Being left speechless, his mouth opened and closed as if he couldn't choose the words he wanted to say. ''y/n, what's wrong?'' He managed to ask you atlast, stepping closer to take a hold of your arm but you shook his hand off, not wanting to be touched right now.

''Why do you like me?'' Taking deep breaths to steady your breathing, you looked up at him, needing him to answer truthfully. ''Why are you with me?''

You could see the confusion and hurt flashing across his eyes, eyebrows scrunched together in confusion as he began to stutter, maybe not a good start as he was the one who now saw how your shoulders fell in defeat.

More tears pooled into your eyes, your sight getting blurry as more and more thoughts of self hatred started to dance across your vision, like they were mocking you, as if they were laughing at you. The thoughts you've had before getting to know Taeyang, proving you right.

''Dove, no!'' He hurriedly took a step forward, grabbing a hold of your arms again and pulling you right into his chest, one arm folding over your waist and keeping you caged into his embrace by holding the back of your neck. ''No, no. no.'' Taeyang was terrified to be honest, feeling his heart beating in his throat, shaking his head in denial while squeezing you tighter and tighter as you tried to wriggle yourself out of his grasp.

''y/n...'' That was all he could manage to say at this moment as he felt your whole body shaking with the heartbreaking sobs you let out. ''I'm left speechless. I wish I could tell you all the words to let you believe how beautiful and kind you are but-'' He cut himself off, letting his hand wander down your body and pushing you closer through his hand on your spine. ''- words are merely words.''

Pulling you away, he cups your tearstained cheek, wiping the tears under your eye away with a sad smile. ''Tell me what's wrong, dove.'' Taeyang sees the sadness pooling into your eyes, you look defeated, you look so tired and small that it breaks his own heart. Leading you to the bed, he helps you to sit down and tucks your head on his shoulder.

''I'm sorry.''

''No, don't apologize.'' He quickly shushes you by placing a kiss on your cheek, his hand smoothing down your hair. ''You don't have to go if you don't want to. I don't mind at all, you know that.'' You could tell he was not touching the subject yet, you knew he would want you to start and tell him what was bothering you but the way he said he wouldn't mind if you stayed at home bothered you even more and played right into the false selfimage you've projected. Didn't he wanted to be seen with you?

The silence that came from you, made him understand how his words actually sounded like once he thought them over and mentally slapped himself at the choice of words.

''Ah, shit. y/n that's not what I meant. I- '' Taeyang was right, he knew he was. Words were merely words and they were so easy to say without having to do anything for it. As a singer, you would think he would have a way with words but he - a true dancer afterall - showed his emotions with his body. The movements telling more of a story than any words ever would and that's when he realized, he would be better off showing you how amazing, and wonderfully made you actually are.

With a deep breath, he held onto your face, eyes flickering over your features as you just silently watched him. What you weren't expecting though was him lowering you down on the mattress, him shaking his head at your confused gaze. ''You trust me?''

Ofcourse, you trust him. You've shown all that you are to him. Baring yourself to him in anyway. What kind of question was that? ''Ofcourse, Taeyang..'' He didn't let you finish though. ''Then let me.'' With a nod, you watch the man standing above you, curious as what his next move is going to be.

Taeyang felt his stomach burning at the sight beneath him. You laying on your back with nothing but pants and a bra on and he could feel his cock reacting at the sight and he knew it would be a mattter of when, where he would actually start to think with his dick. He couldn't help it, that's just what you did to him.

You were irresistable, really. Just watching you cook, watching you make his coffee and how you would prance around the house with nothing but short shorts on and sports bra drove him crazy most of the time and always managed to cage you between the wall and his chest, having you crying out his name.

Licking his lips, he crouched down infront of you to run his hands up your clothed legs and grabbed the hem of your trousers, pulling them down without any thougths. If these clothes made you feel like you were not worthy enough, than those absolutely needed to go and he was determined to never see them again. ''There.'' He chuckled, flinging the pants right out your line of sight. ''That's much better isn't it?'' You couldn't help but to giggle too, seeing how he grinned right up at you from the floor, you being propped up on your elbows to soak in his attention on you. You hummed at that, breathing out that it was much, much better.

''However-'' Taeyang circled his fingers right beneath the flesh of your thighs. ''-there are still some fabrics constricting your freedom, don't you agree?'' He toyed with the hem of your panties, letting his fingers glide over the band from side to side. ''Will you let me help you?'' Rising from his position on the floor, he was now hovering above you and you took in a breath when you felt him dipping past the cloth and the only thing you could tell him was. ''Yes, yes, ofcourse.''

With a smirk, he didn't waste any time and pulled off your underwear, throwing it behind him before his hands gripped onto your thighs and positioned your legs just how he liked it; feet propped up onto the bed, knees bend and your pussy on full display for his eyes only.

The gush of cold air made you whimper and even more excited than you already were. The intense gaze Taeyang had you locked onto him. You felt his hand slide down to your pussy and you gasped when he played with your wet lips, sliding up and down with slow movements, as if he was painting a picture with the slick you were presenting him.

He did find you just as beautiful as a painting. Taeyang knew you would laugh if he told you, but you were even more beautiful than all those women that've been painted over the centuries. He wish he could capture this in one, the sight of your heavily breathing chest going up and down, the anticipation in your eyes that told him he was the only one you'd bare yourself to.

You on the other hand found your fingers in his hair, pulling him down to press your lips to his, murmuring that it was okay, that you needed him, he didn't let those words go to waste and you gasped into his mouth when you felt him sink two of his finger past your entrance.

''Ah..Tae.''

Taeyang hums, gripping your chin to throw your head further back to attach his lips onto the exposed skin of yout throat. You felt your cheeks getting warmer not only because of the pit of your pleasure growing more and more with his fingers moving inside of you, but the way he spoke to you, the way his lips trailed a path full of praises down your body. From your throat to your stomach, his hand slipping beneath the fabric of your bra that you totally forgot was still on and you whined at the feeling of it digging into your skin as you tugged on his hair to tell him to take it off.

And who was he to deny you from it, slipping his fingers out to pull the final piece that was hiding you from the pure Goddess that you are and immediately cupped your bare breasts that he loved to hold at any moment if he could while signig praises of how ethereal you looked to him.

You were looking at the ceiling, taking in every sensation that Taeyang brought with his lips and his hands that were gripping, sliding and moving all over your body like a home that he made himself so familiar with.

Taeyang was feeling his cock growing harder and harder in the constriction of his pants and he started rut his hips on the bed between your legs, moaning out your name while slipping your nipple between his lips what shakes him awake with the thought that he could have something else rolling between his teeth and he doesn't let any grass grow over that thought and moves his lips down south, resting his knees back on the carpet to come face to face with your glinstening pussy.

He groans at the sight, the scent of your arousal creates an even more need to show you how much you drive him crazy by simply existing.

'You on the other hand are going insane for a whole different reason and that's seeing your man fully clothed with a wicked grin plastered on his face as if he is ready to devour his favourite meal after a long day of practicing. And if Taeyang could read your mind, he would have agreed because that's exactly how he is feeling and somehow the tightness of his pants makes it feel like he is driving home right into you. But this time, today, in this moment it was all for you.

A dance he would dance every single day to show you that you are nothing but a gorgeous human being. That no one else compared to you and so he found his way between your legs again, spreading your thighs even more for better access and he happily took his first bite by sinking his teeth in the flesh of your thigh and hums with satisfaction before finally finding home with his tongue licking up his favourite taste in the universe, moaning loudly to let you know this is where he belongs.

You were nothing but a mess on the bed, breathing heavily while tying to keep your legs open, for him to have the room to work on his beautiful canvas as he likes to call it. But your body was starting to shake, feeling the heat of the fire spreading through your body as he tongue worked wonders, teasinly playing with your sensitive bud while he sank his fingers back into your craving hole and it made you feel so hot in so many ways that you completely forgot about the insecurity that was trying to break you down.

Now it was Taeyang's turn to break you down, molding you exactly in how he pictures you. A canvas that only he could shape into anything he wanted and he always would remember you that he was the one and only that knew how to work the art.

''Why is it that you taste so good, y/n. If I could drink this any day-'' The slurping sound did have you giggling, slapping his shoulder in a playful matter and he snickered, looking up at you and proudly showing off his shiny lips covered in your arousal, to you in a gorgeous smile. ''Never get enough.''

Going back in, he slowly pulled out his fingers only to replace them with his tongue while circling your clit with his thumb that had you closing your legs at the sudden spike of pleasure, but Taeyang presses your legs right back open, not having any of it and eats you further out without any bother pushing you over the edge more and more.

Your body is withering, your hands finding a life line with the sheets scrunched between your hands as you feel yourself falling over the edge when he loudly groans, the vibrations flowing through your body and you come right on his tongue.

Taeyang keeps you grounded on the bed with his arm thrown over your stomach, waiting out your spasms and slowly licking through your folds, careful not to overstimulate you.

Once you come down from your high, you stare at the ceiling, focused on the lamp hanging above you but Taeyang happily takes that attention right back to him when his face pops up in your vision, his hand wiping the cum of his chin with this 'stupid' smirk that he loves showing you right after. It's become routine at this point and you happily throw your arms around his neck, pulling him into a loving kiss. He happily obliged, opening his mouth to let you in, sharing the taste of you that brings him just as much pleasure as it does for you.

"You okay?" Taeyang wraps his hand around yours, kissing your fingers before grabbing onto a pillow, lifting your head and places the pillow right beneath, wanting you to be comfortable.

"Okay?" You ask him in disbelief. "More than, that was.." You can't even get your thoughts together, still feeling the high soaring through you and you hear him chuckle. "Than my mission is almost complete."

Letting go of your hand, he starts to work on his pants, with quite a hurry as he feels like he is unable to breathe with how his cock is literally begging him to let it breathe. To bring him home to where he belongs.

You swat his hands away, wanting to do it for him and he whines for you to do it quickly, he needs to feel you wrapped around his cock.

"I don't want to wait any longer, please." You gasped when he gripped your wrists and push you down onto the bed, pulling his shirt over his head while he pinned his gaze onto yours, daring you to move. He couldn't wait, he just couldn't and shimmied out of his pants, underwear quickly discarded and he let out a long grunt from satisfaction. He felt like he could breathe just a little better but naturally, only you could bring him that relief.

You always took him in when he undressed himself before you. His movements really were one of a kind, even when he wasn't dancing, he just moved around like he was and you could never get enough of it.

Crawling onto the bed, he wrapped your legs around his waist, getting you and himself comfortable and after he confirmed you were, he took ahold of his cock, spreading the precum over the skin before lining himself up at your entrance. You lifted your back just a little and the change of movement had the tip slipping right past your lips and you both moaned at the feeling, Taeyang getting the hint and sliding himself right past your walls, bringing it home atlast.

His lips trembled, toes curling when the warmth of your walls welcomed him in without any resistance and didn't care how loud the sound of his moan was, all he could focus on was how you gasped loudly, mouth falling open the moment he sank right into you.

"Feels good?" Taeyang was already panting, dropping his face in the crook of your neck and pulled his hips back only to slip back in. The slow drag of his cock going in and out, left you grasping onto his back, matching his movements with your own.

''Aren't you sounding so pretty f'me?'' Taeyang relished unto the sounds you let out everytime his hips bucked against yours and whined when he drew back. ''Being such a pretty girl, aren't you, dove?'' The nickname slipped out, coming so naturally to him, it turned you on even more, there was nothing on your mind at this point, besides your man and his cock driving into you.

Sitting up, Taeyang slid his hands from your legs to your waist, arching your hips to slide in just that deeper and you let out a yelp once he hit your spot. ''I can't hear you.'' Your eyes were closed, your fingers desperately trying to hold onto something, your nails digging into his wrists as you mewled with tears streaming down your face.

Now these tears were something he absolutely loved to see on you. Looking all so pretty for him with nothing on and his cock thrusting in and out of you as your walls clamped down onto him.

''Are you my pretty girl?'' He asked you again, fingers gripping your chin as he needed you to look at him, needed to see the pleasure he was giving you written all over your face. Your body was speaking for itself, throwing itself to him and giving him all the handles he needed to pleasure you.

"Fuck, Taeyang." You weren't hearing him, your legs slipping from his waist as you felt the fire in your stomach growing more and more for the second time that day but he wasn't gonna let you have it just like that. Not when you weren't answering him and did what he knew would get your attention - He slipped out.

Now this had your eyes flying open in an instant, wrapping your legs back around his waist, hoping it would stop him but ofcourse you knew it wouldn't work and you whined, hands grasping his shoulder, clawing onto them to bring him closer.

He didn't budge though, eventhough his cock was twitching at the loss of your warmth, eventhough he wanted nothing more than to give you what you wanted, he wasn't going to until you agreed you were his pretty girl. That the thoughts that actually brought you in this moment were nothing but false images you had of yourself.

"I said are you my pretty girl?" the tone of his voice did let you know there was no discussing, no avoiding an answer. He wasn't gonna give you what you craved until you answered him.

His eyes were steadfast gazing into yours, not wavering and you felt his grip on your legs tightening. No bullshitting, no stuttering that's what he needed to hear from you.

"I am." It was soft, barely noticeable and you could tell he wasn't satisfied with that. A scoff was heard from him, teeth were scraping his lips and he leaned down, nose brushing against eachother as he breathed onto your lips. "No good enough, darling."

Taeyang knew this was gonna happen so he came up with a second plan to have you admit you were his pretty, gorgeous girl. His hand reached between his legs, his leaking cock resting in his palm and he started to flick his tip against your clit, your body reacted, your vocals agreeing that you were a foolish one for denying your man.

"What was that? Couldn't quite hear you, y/n."

Your walls were clenching around nothing, throbbing - no begging for intrusion, it all felt like you were walking on a humid summer day, the slick of the hot weather sticking to you, bounding you to give in.

It was not like that was the only answer you could give him, he wasn't demanding you to say the right words that he longed to hear from you. Because he knew that you knew that you were his one and only pretty girl. That he saw beauty whenever he looked at you and that no one could take that away from you and him.

"Come on." Taeyang pressed his lips on your jaw, eyebrows scrunched together in concentration not to blow his load. He wasn't only teasing you - oh how he was torturing himself here too - he didn't want to end this on a high when you would slip back in the false mindset you've had after all of this.

"I am your pretty girl, Tyang... Just please!" More tears were making their way down your cheeks, body on fire, walls begging to be fucked at this point and your heart hammering in your chest like it was protesting against your mind, that she was the one you needed to listen to.

Taeyang was the one who made a home out of your heart after all.

Your sweaty palms cupped his cheeks as you brought your feet higher, settling them down on his back and digged your heels into his skin. Your body was telling him to get on moving, while you maintained eye contact as he finally slipped back in.

The both of you moaned out in satisfaction, yielding your bodies to pleasure without any thoughts lingering back in both minds.

Release.

Release was now the mission Taeyang set himself up upon. The release of all the tension and mistrust you've been putting on your body. You were gorgeous, you were breathtaking and just right how he loved you.

It didn't matter what size you were, beauty and love wasn't only stored in certain type of bodies. Love came in all shapes and all sizes, in all different conditions and he would be damned if he wasn't gonna let you know how fucking beautiful you were.

Propping himself up on his elbows, he started to thrust faster, his hand finding yours to squeeze as he shivered and felt his stomach dipping in the pleasure that was getting tighter and tighter with the way your walls were squeezing him for all he had.

"You're so good to me, so so good." His breath hitched in his throat, letting out quiet 'ah, ah' as his cock burned, ready to paint your walls in his favoutire colour.

And you, you loved how vocal he got when he got closer and closer to his release, his quiet breathes that got louder and louder and the way he started to babble, losing his words, fully immerged in the pleasure you were providing him.

"Only you know how to get me going, I am your pretty girl, Tyang. Only yours."

"fuck, yes. My pretty, pretty girl. Fuck.. Where do you want me, gorgeous?" Eventhough his mind was set on shooting his load right into you, perhaps that's not what you wanted and he managed to squeeze that out his mouth while he was trying to stay afloat.

His question had you clenching around him, the fact he asked you even after all the times he did come inside of you, he never forgot to ask although he and you both knew you wanted nothing but feel his sperm filling you up.

"Inside, inside - please." You practically begged him and your answer had him rolling his eyes back as he crashed his lips against yours.

A few more thrusts was that it took before your thighs started to shake and your orgasm washed over you, Taeyang not far behind, his whole body shivering as he shoot his release right where you needed him with a loud, beautiful moan.

Your body was milking him for all he had, and you gasped when you still felt him releasing inside of you and chuckled out of surprise.

"Wow.."

"Yeah..."

Rolling off you, he laid down beside you and breathed heavily, his dick still twitching after his release and he pulled you against him, needing to feel your body pressed against his. "You could say that again." Taeyang laughed out of disbelief and mere happiness as he looked over at you.

You were glowing, eyes sparkling in the late afternoon sun that was shining through the window. Last time he checked it just turned 1 when he walked up to the room to check on you.

"So, feeling pretty?" Taeyang smirked at you, raising an eyebrow to dare you to deny it. With a playful roll of your eyes, you hiked your leg over his and let the silence linger a little longer before answering him.

"I am feeling full, actually."

You were trying not to burst out in laughter at the way his jaw fell and how his ears were turning red but how could you not when he was everything you've dreamed of, you were just so happy you could love him like this, tease him whenever, your heart ready to burst from the happiness you were feeling.

He softly slapped your thigh, quickly messaging your muscles after, knowing it was probably gonna hurt after a couple of hours with the way he had you pressed against the matress and how he kept your legs locked around his waist, which reminded him.

"There is a premiere tonight.." This was what it all started, so he was a bit hesitant to bring it up now but he had to ask. He wouldn't be upset if you decided you didn't want to go, but he wasn't gonna lie either. He hoped you would go with him.

"Hmm." You hummed, smoothing down his hair that was wet with sweat as you thought about his question.

You knew that's how life was. There was always going to be something in this society that would make you feel less worthy than others, there were good days and sometimes there were days where you felt like crying but with Taeyang by your side (knowing that some people would tell you that a man shouldn't be the one to make you feel like you were worthy of love) you did feel beautiful, you did feel like you were capable of being loved for simply being who you were. And there was nothing wrong with that. Love is a basic necessity for a human after all. What is the world without love?

"There is a premiere indeed." Placing a kiss on his cheek, and one on his nose and the final one on his lips, you were more than ready to walk that red carpet with him. "That I would love to go to with you."

You could see his face lighting up more and he surprised you by rolling back ontop of you and you slapped his back, shaking your head with laugher. "We have to get ourselves ready if we want to be there, Tyang! Plus, I don't think I want to walk the red carpet with cum drying between my thighs no matter how much I love it."

And with that, Taeyang peeled you from the bed and guided you to the shower where he might have shown you again how hot you were to him.

[kunikinnie]

Hii ive never done this before but um do you think you could do a poe x fem reader and she like puts a few small braids and like butterfly clips in his hair and she asks him to braid her hair, but he doesnt really know how to braid but he doesnt want to let her down and tried his best? Only if you have time tho :)

~Amethyst

a/n: this is so cute ugh I hope you don't mind me doing a drabble for it! this was supposed to be finished on his bday but anyway-

notes: established relationship, reader is female

It was an intrusive thought that he should never have entertained. Had he not, then the conniving gods wouldn't have heard his wish and they might have saved you both from this agonizing torture.

"Are you okay, sweetie?"

How different imagining doing this for you and actually doing it was! You've showed him how, you've shown him even more videos how, but his brain and his trembling fingers must have had their connection severed long before this tribulation.

"I can do it, dear." He said it with such confidence that he almost fooled himself.

His reflection on the mirror, on the other hand, indicated otherwise. The intensity of his expression contradicted the legion of tiny butterfly clips at the ends of the miniature braids you made. Now that his messy bangs were out of the way, the slightest contortion of his features, especially his gray eyes, were more noticeable than ever.

Perhaps you shouldn't have asked him to do this for you if it only served to stress him out this much. Steam might have radiated from his head at this point. You would've told him to stop if he wanted to, but it seemed that he was so hell-bent on fulfilling your request that any word you told him did not penetrate his mind at all.

His effort deserved all the accolades in the world, you thought, and now you couldn't suppress a smile from creeping onto your face.

"I-I'm almost... done..."

By some act of mercy, your lover did manage to finish braiding your hair. It was far from what he was used to seeing on you - shame on him, really - and he began to apologize profusely the moment he let go of your soft strands.

He wholly expected a sigh of disappointment from you; instead, he was met with a light chuckle.

"It's not that bad for a first-timer," you sweetly said as you turned to face him. "Thank you, love. It means a lot."

His face began to flush crimson at your words. The moment he started stammering nonsense again, your amused smile grew wider. Now there's the adorable Poe you knew and loved - especially better now given his current hairstyle.

You planted a soft kiss on his cheek, ending his incoherent rambling. "Thanks again. Maybe you should practice more, if you'd like?"

"I-I'd rather we don't subject ourselves to this anymore..."

"Alright, alright. Sorry for the trouble."

The key takeaway was, he believed, that creating such physical expressions of beauty were, unfortunately, beyond his own. He'd leave those things to you as he was perfectly content capturing your beauty in words.

[puppiesandnightlock]

Link: My Blood (super sons week day five)

Summary:

Damian reflects on the use of the nickname "dami" and jon tells him abt some new words he learned in arabic.

also known as some angsty shit that started out rlly sweet but ended with a possible dead damian??

The first time that Jon had called Damian “Dami”, he had instantly recoiled, with a stubborn response of “Don’t call me that.” 

After all, how could he know what it meant to him?

Nevertheless, he persisted. His brothers had taken to calling him what they assumed was only a shortened version of his name, as well as his father on rare occasions.

After a particularly hard battle, Jon had said it with such reverence, he nearly believed him when he did, although he was quick to snap back at him. 

A few similar altercations like that, and Jon had stopped, changing it to various other little nicknames, somehow only ringing it out in the most dire of situations, when emotions ran high.

It sent a pang to Damian’s heart, because although he wouldn't admit it, he missed hearing the word from his lips.

And if he were to die, that would be the last thing he wanted to hear.

“NO! No, Damian, stay with me. Stay with me, bud, just a little longer..” Jon’s face was streaked with tears, and Damian reached a bloodstained hand from where he was laying, his head on Jon's lap.

“Isn’t it funny?” He said suddenly, the world going dizzy.

The sky behind Jon was an orange-purple hue, the battlefield littered with bodies and metal pieces, and battered heroes stubling together, trying to find each other.

“What’s funny, D?” 

“You all call me Dami. and here I am, covered in my blood. ”

“Damian, Damian, please don’t-” Jon choked out, looking anywhere but Damian’s stomach, where an alien spear had pierced through the kevlar of his suit.

His hand cupped Jon’s face, bringing him back towards him. 

“Hey. Hey, look at me. It’s okay. You can let go. I’ll be okay, I promise.”

A heartbroken laugh sounded from the younger boy as he looked down at him, brushing the matted hair from his emerald eyes.

How he would miss them..

“Oh, Dami…”

“I’ll be okay, Jon. You know why? Because I'll have you with me wherever I go.” He gave a smile, the broken domino on his face sliding down.

Jon held him, desperately praying for a miracle, for at least a Bat to show up to see Damian should the worst happen.

His eyes grew heavy, and he let a smile grace his lips. “You know to tell them I love them, right?”

“Dami, stop, you're not going to die, you’re not!”

The younger boy pleaded with him, the pain in his face something that hurt Damian more than the gaping hole in his stomach.

“Call it a nap, then. Will you talk to me? I want to see you smile.”

A wobbly grin spread across his features, and his hand ran through the bleeding boy’s hair as he began to talk.

“I was so confused, why you were always so mad when I called you Dami, why you always told me to stop. I remembered you did speak arabic a lot, and so i looked it up. I found how much it must have meant to you, so I switched it up. I used it only when I wanted you to know I meant it. 

“You are my blood, my heart, my soul. You’re a part of me, a teammate, my partner. I found a few more terms like that. Hayati was my favorite. That describes who you are to me, Dami. You’re my life, my light…my whole world. I love you so much/”

His eyes shut, and the world went dark, He floated off in his mind, to wherever this would take him, with the reminisce of the words Jon had left him with. 

I love you. I love you, I love you, I love you. My life.

Hayati.

A/N:

DAMIAN NUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU

okay, you choose, did he die or was he saved????? personally i would have gone with death lmao yes i did cry a lil writing this thats how u know its good lol

i may be persuaded to put up a poll on who wants him to die and who wants him to live and write a sequel on whichever is most popular O.o

if u read it and feel the need to screm at me for doing this, go ahead id love to c it lmao

for @super-sons-week-2023