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msgexymunson · 4 months

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One Slow Blink Part 2

Second part right here due to Tumblr restrictions

Description: As a nurse, you want to help people, as many as you can. But, with the insane things that have been going on in Hawkins, and the crazed look in Dustin's eyes when he stumbles into the ER covered in blood with an impossible tale to tell, it makes you wonder; how much are you prepared to give?

Warnings: NSFW, Minors DNI, *Here there be monsters! Honestly, there's straight up monster fucking in this so if you're not into that do not read*, AFAB sub nurse reader x dom monster Eddie, kinda Alpha/Omega without them knowing it, injury descriptions, S4 does happen and Eddie lives but he be a monster, hand job, fem oral receiving, male oral receiving, consensual predator/prey dynamic, fingering, very rough sex, biting/marking, unprotected p in v, knotting.

A/N: This has come from yet another deranged dream of mine. I imagine Eddie looking kinda like a mix between the Beast from the original Beauty and the Beast, and the dog/kangaroo guys from Tank Girl, but with a longer snout. If you don't know, that's a dirty mix between a lion, a bear, a wolf and maybe a little of Venom's tongue (because I am a whore.)

22k words for both parts, I know, mental, but it's worth it ;)

Masterlist Part 1

You must have fallen asleep like that, as once your eyes open it looks to be almost night, the sun dipping past the horizon. The light slipping past your makeshift curtain is a deep red. You ache all over, especially your shoulder, but it doesn't stop you from smiling.

At some point he must have pulled you on top of him, both arms circling you possessively, holding you to his chest like a child's doll. His member has slipped out of you; you can feel the stickiness of his release coating the sensitive flesh of your inner thighs.

Breathing changes as he stirs beneath you, opening his eyes in a squint.

“Hey you.”

He murmurs a soft sound from his chest, licking your cheek with his long tongue.

“Ew! Eddie, you've got dog breath.”

“Charrrming.”

You laugh, hitting his chest playfully, shifting above him so you're straddling him.

“We better get cleaned up, I've got to get to the hospital in a few hours.”

Eddie whines, grabbing your hips as you try to stand, pushing your wet heat against his twitching bulge.

“Eddie…”

You breathe out in a warning, but it sounds too needy. He's not listening, rubbing you back and forth over his swelling length.

“Eddie I don't think I can take another round, you were- oh fuck-”

The sentence falters as he catches your clit, setting a thousand butterflies loose in your tummy.

“I’ll… be gentle.”

You hiccup a little laugh, staring down at him with a raised brow.

“I don't think you can.”

“Forrr you… I can.”

You reach out to stroke his fuzzy cheek and he nuzzles into the touch. The affection he shows from that simple gesture has you relenting, guiding his member into you, slipping in easily, his previous sticky release helping its journey.

Sitting back and allowing yourself to revel in the beautiful stretch, you experience that familiar wash of relief, a calm caressing your very soul. Eddie seems to feel it too, letting out a long breath as his shoulders lose tension.

“This feels right,” you confess, hand running down his chest, “like, like-”

His gravelly purr interrupts your spill words, reverberating through your ribcage.

“Like you… werrre made forrr me, sweet-hearrrt.”

It's much slower this time, more of a languid grinding as you both move against each other, that undercurrent of need more of a smouldering heat, rather than the unquenchable fire from earlier. Eddie pants as he watches you, tongue hanging from the side of his mouth as you reach your precipice, your eyebrows knotting and body shuddering around him.

Falling against his form, entirely spent, skin glowing with sweat, you hold onto him as he chases his own release. True to his word, he's much more gentle, gripping your hips and moving you to meet his shallow thrusts. You see his snout scrunch when he's on the brink, just before he pulls you off of him and holds you to his torso. You can feel his cock pumping out his orgasm against your stomach, glueing the pair of you together.

“Eddie, you didn't need to-”

“Last time we werrre… stuck togetherrr, for half hourrr.”

You giggle, astonished at his words.

“Really? Damn, I must have fell asleep.”

“You did. Couldn't move. Was… nice.”

Reaching up to play with the fur on his cheek, you think about what he just said.

“You know, I think that's knotting. You know, like d-”

“If you say… dogs…” He warns, winding a finger in your hair and tugging gently.

“Fine. Canines.”

He grabs you, holding you in place as he slathers your face with his tongue, drooling all over you.

“Eddie! Yuck, stop, stop!”

“Thought I was… dog. This is what dogs do… rrrright?”

You squeal loudly trying to extricate yourself from his hold.

“OK, OK! You're not a dog! Stop!”

He finally relents and you get up, unpeeling from the sticky skin and matted fur of his stomach.

“Right, I'm gonna have a shower before you start humping my leg.”

He snaps his teeth at you playfully as you leave. When you're standing in front of the bathroom mirror, you see why your shoulder hurts so much. There's teeth marks in it; pinpricks of broken skin tinged with blood. They aren't deep, but the redness around them looks like it's going to leave a hell of a bruise. For some reason, you're not mad. The opposite in fact. It feels like a claim. You are his, and this is so the world can see.

Once you're clean and relatively dry, you go into the living area to find some food, throwing on one of Eddie's new t-shirts. It may as well be a dress, the hem kissing your mid thigh.

Something doesn't feel right though. Suddenly there's a rolling in the pit of your stomach, a sense of impending doom. The light streaming through the partially boarded windows is still an ominous red. Risking a look, you peer out of the slats and see the sky.

It's flashing red and blue, as if there's an enormous thunderstorm boiling the heavens, but there's no sound. It looks unnatural, colouring the landscape around in the same foreboding hues. You feel hot, and sick.

Eddie barrels into the room with a towel still around his waist, tackling you to the ground.

“Eddie, whats-”

“Stay low… some-thing coming… smells wrrrong.”

You whisper as quietly as you can.

“What can you smell?”

He takes a moment, snuffling at the air with his eyes closed.

“Outside… woods, dirrrt. Frrriends, coming. And… can't ex-plain in worrrds. Sticky… chem-i-cal… pulsing… grrey blue. Wrrrong.”

You suppose that's what you get for asking a question about something you can't possibly understand, what with the stark differences in your senses. You try a different tact.

“Have you… smelled it before?”

“Differrrent… but, similarrrr… to up-side-down.”

There's the shoe that you were waiting to drop. Now the feeling in your gut made sense.

“Eddie, you said… friends were coming?”

“Harrrrrington… and Henderrrrson forrr surrre… smell the damn hairrsprrray.”

In spite of the situation, you giggle. He flashes his teeth, dropping his guard for just an instant.

There's a powerful knock at the door that makes you jump. Eddie leaps up and flings it open with such force that it slams into the wooden wall sending dust flying.

You just about make out the figure of a girl with a shaved head and a bloody nose who thrusts an outstretched hand toward Eddie. Dustin's voice rings out behind her.

“Elle no!”

There's a strange force, like a gust of wind with no air that buffets around Eddie's snarling form. You feel it pulling you, ripping you backwards as you roll across the floorboards. Eddie seems unaffected, not moving from his spot.

“Eleven, stop! You think monsters wear pink towels??”

The girl looks baffled and turns to where Dustin is running forward, waving his arms wildly. Steve is following quickly behind. They both look battered and bruised. As Steve comes into focus you see his entire front is covered in blood.

Instincts kicking in, you shoulder past Eddie and run toward him.

“Steve, what happened!”

“It's alright it's not my blood. Eleven, this is Eddie.”

Ah, Eleven. It makes more sense now. The powers, the shaved head.

“Who- is she?”

Eleven stares at you with a confused expression. You introduce yourself, and explain what you think you are.

“...I'm, er, Eddie's girlfriend.”

Eleven's eyes widen but she doesn't say anything. Dustin, however, can't possibly stop the words spilling from his mouth.

“Girlfriend?? Seriously? But-”

“Henderson, focus! That's not important right now!”

“I was just asking, Steve!”

“Well don't we have other stuff we need to-”

“Hey!”

Shocked, you realise the shout came from you.

“Everyone, just calm down and get inside so we can talk, OK?”

Your words seem to cut through all arguments as everybody makes it inside, standing and looking at you for direction. Attempting to keep the authoritative air you've managed to concoct, you order them to sit down whilst you and Eddie get dressed.

When you're no longer feeling so exposed, you come back into the living room holding Eddie's hand.

“Right now, Steve, you first. What the fucks going on?”

He weirdly looks at Eleven first, who gives a curt nod.

“Right, right, so, it's a little-”

Dustin cuts in.

“-Vecna's back from the Upside Down with his Demogorgons and bats and stuff and they're taking over Hawkins and we need Eddie Dog to help defeat him!”

Stumbling back a little stunned, your wide eyes search his vainly for the sign of some prank. There is none.

“So… you're saying there's monsters in Hawkins??”

Steve responds calmly, juxtaposing Dustin’s trembling form.

“ ‘fraid so. Nance and Hopper and everyone else are holed up in the library. Everyone left in the town’s there. Well, everyone who's not dead or ran away.”

“Wait, so Hopper’s alive??”

“Yes! He was captured by evil Russians but Mrs Byers got him back and-”

“Alright, alright,” you hold your palms up to Dustin, “what does Eddie have to do with this?”

“Listen, Henderson's got this theory that Eddie's… powers… came out so he can stop Vecna.”

“But that's absurd, he was bitten!” You turn to Eddie but he looks just as shocked as you.

“Yeah but, we've seen a lot of people today who've been bitten by something. No one else changed.”

“Exactly,” Dustin says, grinning, “Eddie's got super strength now, he's all healed, I bet he's got other powers.”

Eleven starts talking unexpectedly.

“I tried to throw him. He did not move.”

“See!? He's a superhero.”

“So, wait, Eleven can't throw him,” you begin, “but that doesn't mean she can't throw stuff at him. What's to stop Vecna throwing a car or something?”

Everyone looks at Eleven.

Wordlessly, she focuses on a lamp that sits on a side table. To your astonishment, it begins to float in the air, then hurls itself at Eddie with remarkable force. Then the strangest thing happens. It hovers a few inches from Eddie as if stopped by an invisible barrier, then falls to the floor uselessly.

Silence. You break it, voice splitting as it goes high pitched with worry.

“Right, but that doesn't mean Vecna can't hurt him, just because Eleven can't, right? Right??”

Eddie's the one to respond, holding your hands in one bearish paw.

“Sweet-hearrrt, they'rrre rrright… I can help… I should help… need to prrotect the Shirrre… prrrotect you.”

“But-but-” Tears well in your eyes as you stare back at him.

“I need to… otherrrrwise… I am… this… is all a waste.”

You nod, but pull your hands from his and walk into the bedroom, shutting the door behind you. The pain is too much to bear. It does make sense, if you were being rational, but right now you aren't rational. Nothing about this is rational. You've just found the love of your life and you might lose him to this stupid fight.

Fuck. You love him.

It's finally clear. The feeling in your stomach, the draw you have toward him, the fire in your veins, in your heart. You barely know him, but you love him.

And now that might get ripped away because of some damn fight that shouldn't have had anything to do with him in the first place.

You perch on the bed, head in your hands as tears leak down your cheeks. There's no fight in you to stop them, grieving for something that hasn't happened yet but seems inevitable. There's whispering in the other room, plans being made, but it all sounds like it's underwater, drowned by the power of your tears.

After a while, Eddie opens the door and shuffles in the room, sitting down on the bed next to you. He slowly starts to explain the plan to you, how Will can sense when Vecna or the monsters are near, how Elle will help clear a path, how he has the strength to defeat him, since Vecna's powers are all he has. He doesn't have the speed or strength that Eddie does.

There's a loaded quiet when he's finished. You're angry, wiping away stray tears fiercely from your face, but you're not angry at him. You're angry at the situation, at Vecna, at the Upside Down. Angry at the powers that seem to be pulling you apart.

“Fine. But I'm coming with you.”

“No,” he snarls, pulling his arm around you, “they need… heal-ers. You… can help.”

“But what if- what if you get hurt?”

“Won't.”

“Promise?”

Staring up whilst you are brimming with tears, he cups your face, looking back at you with soulful eyes.

“I'll do… everrry-thing I can.”

“No!” You shout, tears falling once again as your face heats up, “you can't say that, they say that in the hospital and people die!”

Wringing your hands, flipping them over and over each other in your lap, you barely notice Eddie falling to the floor in front of you.

Then his burly arms are circling you, his maw pushed into your abdomen, inhaling you deeply, sweetly. It stops your incessant fidgeting, fingers resting in his long locks. They wind into his hair, twisting through to massage his scalp as he purrs into the flesh of your stomach.

“Eddie, if you love me you'll come back to me. Do-do you love me, Eddie?”

He looks up at you, deep chestnut eyes searching your face.

One slow blink.

There's a soft knock at the door and Dustin opens it.

“We have to go soon. Are you ready Eddie Dog?”

Eddie growls low in his throat, swivelling to face him on all fours, hackles raised. Dustin immediately attempts to backtrack, arm raised to try and protect his face.

“I mean, I didn't mean- it's from the demogorgon, you know, demodogs, Eddie Dog, I did think DemoEddie but Dog-”

Eddie pounces, pinning Dustin to the ground. Dustin's eyes scrunch shut as he screams, voice breaking in terror.

“Shit shit shiiiiiiiiiit!!!”

You giggle inanely as Eddie licks Dustin's face wetly. He bounds off him and shoots a wink at you, before lending Dustin a hand and dragging him to his feet.

“I am not… a dog.”

Dustin is laughing in relief, nerves racking through it.

“No you're not, I'm sorry I'm sorry-”

Steve appears in the doorway.

“Guys, get in here.”

All mockery forgotten, you make your way into the living space in silence.

“Steve, what's going on?”

“That's just it. Listen.”

You all stop, ears working in overdrive as you all try to hear what he hears. Breaking the quiet spell that had drifted over everyone, you speak.

“I can't hear anything.”

“Exactly. Don't you get it? All over town, all through the woods, there's been these things. Demogorgons, bats, horrible things. But here, there's nothing.”

“Eddie, you smell anything?”

Eddie closes his eyes, snout wiggling in effort as he opens his preternatural senses. His voice rumbles out in its usual gravelly purr.

“That scent… it's herrre, it's on them… up-side-down smell… therrres nothing close by… except a few deerrr.”

Steve holds a hand up, stage whispering to you.

“He can smell that?”

“Yes… and hearrr acrrross rrrooms.”

“Sorry big guy, I just- that's awesome.”

Dustin is beaming, staring at Eddie like he's a superhero. Steve continues, making sure he's looking at Eddie, you notice, keeping him in the conversation.

“So, if those things aren't nearby… maybe, maybe they're afraid of him? Hate to say it but I'm starting to agree with Dustin. Maybe you're supposed to be like this Munson.”

Sighing in acceptance, you turn to Eddie.

“Fine. If you think you can help you should go. Don't let me stop you. But you have to come back to me.”

He gives you a slow blink, and you nod, accepting fate. Then you move into action, grabbing the partially used trauma kit, along with anything else you think might be helpful. Everyone else is doing the same, as if they were waiting for your approval.

Pretty soon you're being bundled into what appears to be a stolen pick up truck with Eddie sitting in the back, as you race back into town.

If you could call it town anymore.

Your mind rolls to every post apocalyptic movie you've ever seen, but none of them compare to it happening in front of your eyes. Crumbling buildings that you recognise send spears of hurt through your heart. Over there, the gas station where you bought your first underage beers, now a smoking wreckage. On your left, the drug store where you used to pick up your mom's prescription, cracked and half buried in rubble.

A cloud of chattering sound passes quickly overhead; you hear Eddie growling low as batlike creatures wing their way to another destination, seemingly unbothered by your presence. It's either that, or they don't want to tangle with your boyfriend. You pray that it's the latter.

Steve takes a sharp left turn and you fling to the side in your seat.

“I thought we were heading to the library, isn't it that way?”

“Yep, if you wanna cross a gorge. The roads opened so wide that nothing can get through.”

The enormity of the situation is sinking into you, winding around your spine, fear clasping you in its unwanted clutches.

Ignore it. Don't recognise it. Turn your back on it. There's people that need your help.

Steve pulls up a few yards away from the library, and you clench your jaw, telling your tears to fuck right off. Now is not the time for tears.

You and Dustin jump out of the truck, and he rushes to the library to bring everyone who needs to be part of this final stand. A final stand that doesn't involve you. A final stand that has the love of your life sitting front and centre.

Running around to the back of the truck you grab Eddie's head firmly in both your hands.

“You- you remember what I said? You need to come back to me, you hear me? ‘Cause if you don't I'll kill you myself. Get it Eddie? You do this and you come back to me!!”

Eddie holds your hands in his enormous paws, enveloping your soft flesh instantly. Nuzzling his snout against your cheek, he breathes in your ear.

“I'll come back… to what's mmine.”

You press fierce hot kisses to the soft fur of his face, over and over, until he pulls you from him, holding your hands away.

“You love me Eddie. I know you do.”

One slow blink.

In an instant, he's gone, quieter than snow. Falling to the floor, you hold your head in your hands, crushed by the barbarity of the situation.

You didn't say it. You didn't tell him you love him too. Saying it out loud would make it more real. Saying it out loud would make the pain worse if you lose him.

Soft fingers pry at you, leading you onward, inside. In a daze you follow, feet on autopilot as you clutch the trauma bag in front of you like a shield.

Inside is a bustle of activity, a hive of ants that all have a purpose and none of them involve you. You're guided gently down onto a seat and the insects run about, fetching food, water, bandages. It all seems to be happening outside of you, following a rhythm that you can't hear.

“Hey, hey!” One of the swarm seems to be addressing you. Tilting your head, you look towards them. It's an older woman; half her face is concealed by a makeshift eyepatch.

“You're a doctor, right? We need someone over here now!”

Instincts take over. Legs rising of their own accord, they march over to a camp bed that's been set up. Another woman lays there, breaths shallow and humanising. There's an enormous gash in her side.

“OK OK, I can help, just don't move too much, I'll try and stop the bleeding.”

Then the next person. And then, the next person.

Mind floating into a subconscious haze, your memories take over. That situation before at the hospital, the textbook you once studied, a hypothetical conversation with a doctor. You take it, all at once, power beyond what should be possible, but you do it.

You do it for him.

Minutes pass into hours unseen as you tear through every available useful item, every strip of gauze from your bag, until it happens.

A pain so profound that grips your shoulder and your heart hard enough for you to look around for the shotgun. It emanates out of the bitemark, pulsing into your veins with alarming force.

“He's hurt.”

Collapsing to the side, you hold a firm hand to your own heart, as if you could will it to slow. Legs give out from under you, your rear landing on the hard surface behind. For a minute you sit, unable to move, unable to think, wondering why everyone around seems so controlled. Don't they realise your entire universe is shattering into splinters before their very eyes?

There's a hand shaking you by the arm, someone asking if you're OK. They lift you, place you in a seat, and keep asking, and asking. Your tongue feels heavy, unable to form words to explain the hurt you're feeling. This deep hurt is rooted into your bone marrow; heavy, hard and cold.

There's a familiar face in front of you, a round childish face with curling boyish locks and a worried expression. Dustin.

“Hey, you there? Can ya hear me?”

Nodding wordlessly, you point to your chest, directly over your heart, eyes wincing in pain.

“Did you get hurt?”

You shake your head, and manage one word.

“Eddie.”

Before Dustin can respond, Nancy runs in, face covered in grime and dark blood, panting for breath.

“They… did it… Hoppers here with Eleven. The gates are closed. But, Eddie-”

Hearing his name you rush back into your body.

“Where is he?”

“Steve and Jonathan are taking him back to the cabin. He's unconscious. He’s… in a bad way, but he's alive.”

He's alive.

“I need to get to him. Dustin, grab any bandages you can find. Nancy, you got a car?”

She nods and leads you outside. The sky has quietened, no longer flashing in supernatural colours. Looking upward, you can almost believe this is a normal night in Hawkins. Taking in the streets, the truth is far from it.

Three monstrous things lay on the sidewalk, covered in some slimy substance and splattered in unnatural blood. Their skin has a blue grey sheen to it, and their limbs are twisted awkwardly. Their heads seem to have been split open, but then you realise it's just one gigantic mouth, unfurling like a gristly lily. The fleshy petals are lined with dozens of tiny sharp teeth.

You press a toe to one of them nervously. Its head lulls to one side, utterly lifeless.

“Hey I got the band- Holy shit!!”

Dustin's voice cracks mid sentence, then he sighs in relief when he realises the monsters are dead. Nancy calls at you both to hurry and you bundle into the car as she races through the cracked, ruined streets of Hawkins.

The gas station, the shops, town hall, it's all unimportant. What matters is getting to Eddie. You need to save him.

Suddenly a heavy feeling in your chest lifts, but not in comfort. It's as if someone's tugged a weighted blanket off of you, exposing your vulnerability for the world to see. Eddie's presence, once a firm hold coddling your heart, is reduced to a whisper of a thought. Gossamer threads tie you instead of lead ropes that you hadn't even realised were there until they were nearly gone.

“Nancy, we need to hurry, he's almost gone!”

She doesn't question how you know, just presses her foot to the accelerator and bombs through Hawkins and onto the familiar country road. She gets as near as the woods will allow, until you're yanking the door open and continuing on shaky legs, feet pounding at the bracken and tears streaming from the corners of your eyes.

A singular thought races through your mind with each footfall. Save him. Save him. Like a heartbeat.

The cabin starts to appear out of the darkness, the lights inside a beacon of hope. As you reach the front door it flies open, Steve standing in the frame.

His hair is sticking out in every direction; part of it is plastered to his forehead with blood. A bat with nails in it is hanging limply at his side and his clothes are torn. There's gashes in his front, as if gigantic claws had swiped at him. Previously you would have stopped, gaping at his wounds in horror and done anything you could to help, but after everything you've seen tonight they seem almost trivial.

“Is he here?”

Steve takes a deep breath in, swinging the bat at his side as if on instinct.

“He's here, I guess. He was awesome, then- he wasn't him, in the end. He's not said a word after Vecna, then when Mrs- well, he passed out. Just, be careful.”

You nod and shoulder your way through, past a long haired guy with the intense expression who you assume is Jonathan, and into the bedroom.

It's a familiar scene, so much so that it borders on comfort. He's strapped down to the bed, a belt wrapped around his feral maw. His breaths are shallow and wet sounding. A snarling whistle of a snore escapes on each exhale.

His wounds are deep, much deeper than before. There's blood pooling at his side from a gaping wound, it looks like one of those bastard monsters took a bite out of him. That seems the worst damage, that and a bite on his shoulder that almost mirrors your own. You'd laugh at the irony if you weren't so upset. On top of that, there are so many scrapes and claw marks and bruises that it makes your heart ache.

“One of you, come in here and help me.”

Steve appears in the door frame, bat held high as if Eddie were about to pounce.

“Steve, put the bat down. I need your help cleaning these wounds.”

He lowers his arm and moves nearer to you, but doesn't let the bat go.

“I don't think you get it. When Vecna- when he realised he couldn't hurt him, those demogorgons got him. He fought three of them at once and then he… well, he tore Vecna in half. Since then he's not… he was a beast. Tried to attack me and Hopper, until Mrs Byers whacked him over the head, knocked him out cold. I'm not sure he's Eddie, anymore.”

There's a tug at your heart, a spindly web like thread that pulls you to your love.

“He's weak, but he's there. I know it. Help me clean these wounds and bind them before he bleeds out.”

The two of you work in silence, Steve flinching when Eddie stirs, but he doesn't wake up. When the hole in his side is padded with gauze and tightly bound with bandages, you work on the rest. There's just so many injuries, it's a wonder he's still alive and hasn't bled out yet.

When it's done, with Eddie patched and bandaged as well as you know how, you collapse onto the floor, hands on your knees. All you can do is wait for him to wake up. That's if he wakes up. If he wakes up as him, and not some mindless beast.

“Listen, you've done what you can. You're awesome, really.”

Steve's hand grasps yours on top of your knee.

“If he's gonna come back for anyone, he'll come back for you.”

The smile he flashes melts your heart as he gets up to leave. A second later, he returns with a musty blanket and a worn cushion. You take them gratefully and get comfortable on the floor, hoping against hope that your love wakes up.

********************

A roaring growl shatters through your nerves and startles you awake, rocketing through your senses before you have a chance to think. Hot breath blows across your face, messing your hair and making you blink in its turbulence.

Eddie's on all fours on top of you, crouched low and teeth bared, bindings in tatters all about you. The belt is gone from his jaw; you can only assume he managed to break it with sheer force. A dribble of slobber hangs from his maw; for some reason it's all you can focus on. It wobbles in your vision, as you scramble for some way to get through to him.

He barks roughly, snapping his teeth barely an inch from your face.

“N-now, you listen to me, Eddie!”

Your voice squeaks, belying the stern demeanour you're attempting to convey. He growls low, crouching even further over you, giving you an undeniable urge to flee. You can't, not with Eddie on top of you. Not just that, you know deep within your bones that if you attempt to escape, you're dead.

It suddenly dawns on you that it doesn't matter. You could just throw yourself out there and be eaten. Sure, it'd be painful, but since he's hovering right over your jugular it'd probably be quick. Living without him seems far worse. Or, you might just succeed, and live.

There's no time for hesitation and pleasantries. So, you grasp the fur around his maw and clutch it desperately, fingers winding into his pelt. His eyes widen, jaw closing slightly, and you take the opportunity to pull his head closer. Your forehead sits flush with his, searching his eyes for any sign of the Eddie you know.

“Eddie Munson, you listen to me! You know who I am! Can't you smell it? My smell, your smell? You're mine, and I'm yours. You promised you'd come back to me! So do it, come the fuck back to me or I swear I'll kill you myself!”

Releasing one hand, you pull your t-shirt over your shoulder and show him the mark he left you.

“You see this? You know what this is? Remember, Eddie!”

There's a flicker in his hard gaze, a flash of something that just might be your Eddie. Pressing his snout to the mark, he inhales deeply. Then, he's pressing his jaw to yours, nuzzling your neck with his nose. Moving your head to meet his affection, you rub your faces against each other. The tension in the room dissipates as you finally start to see the human behind the beast.

As he pulls his face away, you stare deep in his eyes.

‘I love you Eddie Munson. I knew you'd come back. You had to, because you love me too. Right?”

One slow blink.

Then, he's falling to the floor on his side, seemingly exhausted with the strain. There's no way you'll be able to get him back into the bed, so you throw your blanket around you both and snuggle into his warm pelt before you fall asleep in his arms.

When you finally wake up, he's still asleep breathing heavily through his nose. The breaths sound much better than before, a stark difference from the heavy, wet sound he was making previously.

Every joint hurts from sleeping on the wooden floor. You stretch in place, click your elbows, and glance back down at Eddie.

Even a few hours seems to have helped Eddie with his recovery. The small grazes you didn't bother to cover up are completely healed; just tiny fine lines of scars are all that's left, like the inking of a delicate pen.

You try to stand up but Eddie's heavy paw is resting on your hip, keeping your back flush to his torso.

“Eddie,” you whisper, half ashamed to disturb him, “I need to move, my back hurts.”

One chestnut eye blinks roughly at you then opens, shrivelling from the light pouring through your ad hoc curtains. He's not said a word yet, a fact that is eating your insides up with worry, but you don't mention it.

He pushes himself off of the floor, managing to stand shakily before flopping to the bed. Even this small movement has him exhausted beyond what should be possible.

“Eddie, do you want me to get you something to eat? You know, to help the healing?”

Those soulful deep eyes bore into you, stretching time for just a moment. Then he blinks deliberately at you, twice.

“No? So, what can I do?”

Wordlessly, he holds his arms out. You crawl into his embrace as he clutches you to his chest tightly, as if he's scared you'll run away. You couldn't though. Not now, not ever.

********************

After a few hours, he's breathing deeply, and you risk moving to the living space. Once you enter you see Steve and Jonathan there. Nancy climbs out of an armchair and makes her way towards the group, diplomatically standing exactly between them.

“We didn't want to disturb. How's he doing?”

Nancy's soft voice breaks the quiet and you allow her a small smile.

“Great. I mean, he's healing like crazy, seems to be something he can do, and he remembers me for sure. He's not spoken yet, but give him time.”

She beams at you, then flashes a thousand watt smile at Steve. Shaking her head slightly, apparently at her own actions, she grabs Jonathan's hand and gives it a squeeze. You don't miss the slight frown that flickers on Steve's face, or the little wanton appraising look he gives Jonathan. It's funny, viewing something from an outsider's perspective. They're the perfect little threesone and they don't seem to even know it.

There's a stirring noise from the bedroom and you run immediately toward it. Eddie's sitting up in bed; it looks like he's trying to inspect the hole in his side with clumsy fingers.

“Hey, it's OK Eddie, don't touch it. I'm gonna look after you, alright?”

A flicker of relief passes across his face and he settles down into the mattress, placated.

You inspect the wound; his recovery is remarkable but there's still a way to go before it's healed. By rights he shouldn't be breathing at all.

“It looks good, it'll take a while to heal completely but I think you're gonna be alright.”

A large hand reaches tentatively to your face and cups it, shaking slightly with the effort. His face scrunches, an internal pain crossing it that seems too much to bear. Then, words emerge.

“...love… you.”

Instantly welling with tears, you cup his hand in your own.

“I love you too Eddie. Now sleep, you need to rest. I'll bring you some water, and some food in a while to get your strength back up.”

He blinks slowly at you, then settles his head back into the mattress, palm dropping from your cheek almost instantly as he falls asleep. You take the cushion from the floor and anchor his head up, slipping it underneath so he doesn't strain his neck.

Staring at him for a moment looking so peaceful makes your eyes well. Wiping furiously at your face, you disperse the tears and turn towards the doorway.

“You alright?”

Steve's standing there, thankfully no longer holding a bat. You nod and walk out of the room with him, after a final glance at Eddie's sleeping form.

********************

Now the danger has passed, the rest of them leave to go get some much needed sleep. The snippets you've been told about the battle for Hawkins sounded bloody and taxing, they all need to recuperate.

When Eddie starts eating you breathe another sigh of relief. It's a good sign. He seems to be having trouble again with picking things up and using words but it's getting better by the hour.

Collecting a bucket from outside, you fill it with warm water and grab some soap and a washcloth from the bathroom, then take it to the bedroom. Eddie's sitting up in bed, having just finished a whole chicken. He's licking juices from his furred fingers when you walk in.

“Hey, that good? Want any more?”

“Good… forrr now.”

You smile at him and waddle over with the heavy bucket. Placing it on the ground with a heavy thud, you soak the cloth and add some soap to it.

“What… doing?”

“Oh, well you've got too many bandages on for me to clean you in the tub, so I thought I'd wash you in here, if that's alright.”

Flashing his teeth in the epitome of a wolfish grin, he purrs out a response as he whips off the blanket covering him.

“Hot nurrrse…. Giving me… sponge bath? Yess please!”

You roll your eyes but you're smiling as you do it, and help him wriggle out of his sweatpants. He's naked, cock already kicking up with your proximity.

“This isn't about that, Eddie!”

“-Orry.”

“And don't just drop your s'es to be cute, I know you can say them!”

He gently grasps your hand in his and you melt just a little.

You start cleaning him as best as you can, tenderly mopping in between the bandages, taking care to remove as much of the crusted blood and grime as possible.

As you work, you feel his furred finger curl under your chin, guiding you to look at him.

“Eddie?”

“You… rrreally carrrre about… mme, don't you?”

Trying to move out of his grip shyly, he holds your chin firmly waiting for your reply.

“I mean, yes, of course. I told you Eddie, I love you.”

Damp fingers twine in his thick burly hand. His eyes are on you but seeing through you, deep in thought. You squeeze his fingers in encouragement.

“What's on your mind, Eddie?”

He huffs a laugh, shaking his head.

“It's stu-pid… I just thought… when it all ended… when gate closed… I'd go back… be norrrmal.”

Emotion floods those brandy hued eyes, you force a lump in your throat to go away.

“Eddie, you've never been normal,” you say, smiling at him, whilst he growls a little chuckle in his throat, “but that's not a bad thing. You're different Eddie. You've always been different. You're odd, and funny, and intense. I love you, and not in spite of those things. Because of them. Because you're you.”

Eddie roughly rubs a hand over his eyes to disguise the tears.

“Love you… what the fuck… did I do… to deserrrve you.”

“Don't know, but it must have been pretty awesome.”

You smile as you finish cleaning him, drying him off as best as you can, and let him get more rest. It seems each time he naps his healing quickens exponentially, so you encouraged as many as you could.

It was late evening by the time you saw him again. You had fallen asleep on the couch in front of the TV, curled up wearing Eddie's black t-shirt and nothing else, with a cushion between your knees for comfort.

There was warm pressure just on the inside of your thigh, a heaviness that for some reason made you feel safe.

Cracking one eye open, you see Eddie is sitting on the floor facing you, his furred cheek resting on your leg. His snout is just breaching the hem of the t-shirt, dangerously close to your heat.

“Eddie, what are you doing?”

He takes a deep breath in and your cheeks flood with embarrassment.

“I miss-ed you… miss-ed this.”

“We can't, like, do anything Eddie, not until you're healed.”

Lifting his head up, he points wordlessly to his side. The bandage has been removed. Amazingly, it's knotted scar tissue; a few tufts of fur are growing on it already. In a few days you'd be surprised if you could even tell the near life threatening blow had even happened.

“Wow, thats- fuck, that's incredible. You're amazing!”

He makes a little satisfied noise at the praise and sits up, towering over you on the sofa.

“So… arrre we good? Forrr… a little game?”

Tilting your head, you mockingly appraise him, looking him up and down and checking each knot of scars.

“Well… seems I can give you the all clear. What did you have in mind?”

Opening his maw, he flicks his tongue over his teeth, and stares at you hungrily.

“I've got… an i-dea.”

He stands up and pulls you to your feet, reminding you again of the sheer size of him, and wordlessly leads you to the back door.

When you're outside, the lack of noise really strikes you. There's not a sound in the woods. An eerie quiet washes over you, making each breath, each heartbeat all the louder. The air is crisp, but not freezing. It nips at your bare legs, trailing goosebumps up your thighs. You look up at the sky; a beautiful array of shining stars fill it, and the moon provides a little light so you can make out the dark shadow of trees about you. It's ethereal and beautiful.

“It's really pretty Eddie, but what's this got to do with a game?”

He stands just behind you, firmly grabbing you by your hips as he bends to speak in your ear.

“We'rrre tied… in ourrr little chases… thought we could…”

“Out here? In the dark? Eddie what if theres-”

“Nothings herrre… animals fled frrrom the monsterrrs… can smell. It's just you… and mme.”

The thought sends a little shiver down your spine, pins and needles rushing from the base of your neck.

“You like the… i-dea. Can tell.”

You curse your own body for betraying you, but he's absolutely right. You're already wet just thinking about it and it's starting to dampen your thighs. A heat floods through you, making you forget about the cold.

“OK… say I'm interested, what are the rules?”

“Two minutes head starrrt… then, when I catch you…” He playfully licks the shell of your ear, “I can do… whateverrr I want.”

“Within reason?” You say, voice already shaking.

“Within… rrreason.”

“Five minutes.”

“Thrrrree.”

“Done.”

Immediately you tear away from his grasp and run, giving him no time to think about it. The forest floor is surprisingly soft under your bare feet, a carpet of pine needles allowing you to run comfortably, unhindered.

Your ears are occupied by the sound of your own beating heart. It's pumping wildly in your chest, pure adrenaline coursing through your veins, making each decision. You zig zag, double back a little, and turn in a circle, to try and throw him off the scent. A part of you wishes there was a river nearby to help confuse the trail further. Then again, most of you is glad there isn't. It's not like you don't want to be caught.

A fallen branch makes you trip and you sprawl unseen in the dark. The rush is still there, but you try to be more careful and take a little time looking for anything on the ground that could harm you. Squinting in the dark, you make out a huge stone in front of you which could have seriously injured you. Skirting around it, there's a copse of close together trees to one side. Then, there's an alrighty roar.

He sounds so close, you must have made less progress than you thought. Dashing for the trees, you enter a little circle of pines and press your back against one panting for breath. You can hear him now. It sounds like he's galloping through the forest on all fours, crashing through branches and twigs like a hot knife through butter.

You daren’t move, you daren’t breathe. This close there's no chance he won't hear you. Thighs clenching so hard you're in danger of losing blood flow, you feel your slick covering them, nearly slipping apart because of it. It's uncanny; you don't know why your body seems to have this visceral reaction to his presence, but really you don't need to know. All you know is that this feels so right, so natural for you, that it's accepted without hesitation.

The absence of noise is what makes you jump. One minute there's crashing and breaking branches; the next, silence. You grip onto the rough bark, fingers white knuckling in fervent anticipation.

You hear him then, soft footfalls crunching and sniffing noises. Keeping your back pressed firmly against the tree trunk, you try to breathe as quietly as you can. Each second that goes by feels like it stretches on for an eternity, as you hear him get closer and closer… and then walk past behind you. Breath leaving you in a gasp, you relax your muscles slightly.

Until he's directly in front of you, completely naked, the sheer weight of him pressed up against you as he pins both your arms by your sides. His cock is throbbing against your stomach, huge and painfully hard. Bending his head to your level, his snout nudges your ear.

“I win… you’rrre mmine.”

He nips at your neck, his sharp teeth breaking the skin. Pain blossoms out from the mark, but it's followed by a wave of pleasure that sends another wash of wetness out of you.

Eddie growls so deeply that you shiver, and suddenly your world is shooting upward as he grasps you firmly by the ass and lifts you up, your t-shirt riding up to your chest. The hard bark of the tree is pressing into your naked skin as he holds you there like a play thing, claws digging in your flesh. His tongue laps through your folds, tasting you with such ferocity that it makes you moan wantonly, your nails scraping into his scalp, hanging on for dear life.

Cloying heat is surrounding you, suffocating you. You pull the shirt over your head and toss it in a vain attempt to get some relief but it's no use. Eddie's tongue is buried inside your tight cunt, a dizzying tornado that's making your head spin, but you need more.

“Fuck- please Eddie, I-I need- oh God- I need you inside me.”

He lifts your back off of the tree, then slams your spine against the rough wood, expelling all breath from your lungs. He's shaking his head back and forth, long snout rubbing over your clit. A hard no, but it's setting fireworks off inside you all the same. He lets up for a moment, just one, rumbling out words so close to your pussy you feel the warm air of his breath and the vibration of it on your clit.

“You want me… so bad… then fuckin’ cum. Now.”

His thumb breaching your weeping sex is a complete surprise. It's just so thick; moving inside you with such animalistic intensity that you're clenching and coming with an obscene scream directed at the heavens. You crumble to ash and dust within his very clutches, the smouldering fire flaming bright and burning all of you, inside and out.

There's no time to recover, to breathe. He slides you down the tree trunk and onto his waiting member, forcing it inside with barely any warning. Tears spring from the corners of your eyes as he forcibly lifts you by your hips and slams you back down, over and over, his powerful thrusts pulling whimpers out of you. You're just so full, his swollen length pulsing inside, throbbing you to ecstasy.

The strings tighten inside you, firming the pressure in your belly, which suddenly snaps, dissolving into an intense wave of pleasure that gushes from your hole and threatens to push him out due to its violence. He shudders with you, holding you close and grinding into you, helping you ride it out with almost gentle movements that bely the ferality he displayed only moments ago. Your foreheads touch softly, breaths in tandem.

For a second you think he's finished. You couldn't be further from the truth. His voice is strained, as if he's trying to keep it under control.

“You… do that… again.”

Before you can blink his knuckles are dragging harshly over your clit, back and forth, sending a shiver through your spine on each rough pass.

“Eddie- oh holy- oh fuuuck!”

You're barely able to speak, to think. Sentences fail to form, in fact your bordering on drooling at the way he's fucking you dumb. In moments you're clenching around him, walls fluttering uncontrollably as you sob out another release, muscles contracting involuntarily and quivering all over your body. After a while, you realise you're weeping, tears streaming with no barriers to stop them.

It still doesn't stop Eddie and his violent conquest over your form. He seems intent on owning you, ruining you, taking every last ounce of pleasure out of you to leave you a shattered blubbering mess. It's as if he needs to get his pain and anguish out; it's pouring from him and into each movement of his hips.

“Again.”

Sobs are bubbling out of your mouth, wet and round, spit gathering at the corners.

“Eddie, I- I can't-”

“Again!”

Then he's pinching your clit hard between thumb and forefinger, as his teeth nip at your breast. The overbearing pain and the zealous pleasure are too much. Shamefully, you release yet again, slick running down your legs and onto the forest floor in a sticky web.

It's only then that he holds you close, hard arms snaking around your back as your legs shake wildly either side of his hips. His bearish hands grasp you tightly as he throbs his own messy climax deep inside you, roaring loudly, pulsing and pulsing until you've milked him dry. Even then he remains, hard and swollen, locked in and unable to separate.

His touch is far more gentle now, lifting you by the hips as if you are to be cherished and placing your back softly to the pine needle covered ground. He hovers over you, almost in fear of breaking you, one rough hand stroking at the delicate skin of your cheek. Staring into his eyes, you see the shame harbouring within them.

Before he can speak, you're grasping his furred cheeks and holding his gaze.

“Eddie, it's OK, honestly. I mean, it was a little rough… but fuck me… that was amazing. You're amazing.”

He nuzzles into you, deeply breathing in your smell as he cuddles you in the softest embrace.

“-Orry.”

“You trying to be cute with me again, Eddie Munson?”

Your stern words just earn you another squeeze, a slightly tighter hold from his firm arms. For a while you lay there, feeling the other's heartbeat and listening to nothing but the wind between the trees.

It takes a bit, but the knot finally subsides and you are able to extricate yourselves from its hold. As soon as Eddie's comforting arms are no longer around you, you start to shiver massively.

“Need.. get you home… climb on.”

He's on all fours, crouching low in front of you like a tamed lion.

“You've got to be fucking kidding me.”

There's a soft rumble in his throat that almost sounds like laughter.

“Get on… beforrrre you frrreeze.”

You can't really argue with that.

Hesitating with your knee up high, you're trying to work out where you need to be. You've never ridden a… a wolf? A lion? A monster? Briefly, you think you've never ridden an Eddie, but you blush profusely when you remember that's simply not true.

Finally deciding on swinging your leg over near his waist at the thinnest part of him, you settle into the soft fur. He swings a paw up and grasps your hand, leading it toward the longer hair down his spine.

“Might want… to hold on… sweet-hearrrt.”

You twine your fingers delicately into the thicker part of his pelt. That is, until he starts running on all fours through the trees. You grip tightly when you feel the sudden rush of speed, fingers losing blood as you hold on in fear of crashing to the floor.

Once the initial shock is over, it's electrifying; a thrilling, hedonistic mix of riding a horse and a motorcycle at once. The wind whips through your hair and stings your uncovered skin, making you feel oh so alive. The constant push and pull of powerful muscles beneath you make you realise just how strong Eddie is. It suddenly dawns on you that no matter how rough he's been with you, he's holding back. If he showed you half his power you doubt you'd live to tell the tale. That stark realisation has you falling for him all over again.

It's that power that seems to flow up from him and through you. You feel like some sort of heathen queen, riding through the forest on your monstrous steed, naked as the day you were born. Wild, savage, and formidable.

Too soon, your impromptu ride is over as he lopes toward the lights of the cabin, eventually coming to a stop. Sliding off of his mighty form, you land on both feet practically buzzing with excitement, caring not a jot for the fact that you were still naked.

“Eddie, that was incredible! We need to do that again, like, every night. Fuck, I'm shaking!”

You beam at him, glowing inside and out.

“If anyone else… said that… I'd bite them. But… it's you. I'll be you’rrre… steed.”

“You just want me to ride you again.”

In the short time you've been together, you've gotten used to the subtle signs in his face, in the looks in his eyes, enough to be able to read him. You don't need any of those though, not when his usual whiskey eyes are blackened with desire.

“You… not done?”

Grinning profusely, you open the back door and beckon him with your finger.

“Nope.”

“You… animal.”

You laugh; a messy, loud, belly laugh at the pure irony of the situation.

Walking into the bedroom, you watch him follow you in. There's pine needles stuck in his fur, and mud crusted into his hands and feet. The very air surrounding him is of forests; of damp and bark and moonlight.

All it's doing is stirring up your insides further. Right now, this heathen queen needs her monster king.

“Lay down.”

He huffs lowly, towering over your tiny form.

“You… telling mme… what to do?”

“Yes. I am. You got a problem?”

You push lightly at his chest, making him collapse mockingly onto the bed, face twisted in taunting pain, as if you had caused him serious harm.

“Don't… hurrrrt mme, prrrincess.”

“I wasn't going to… hurt you, exactly.”

You straddle his body, backwards, mouth hovering near his already firm length as your ass swings tantalisingly just out of reach of his drooling maw.

“Now…. Sweet-hearrrrt, fuuuck… so unfairrr…”

You can feel the breath expelling from his mouth, the way the sweep of his tongue creates air that is failing to make it between your folds. It makes your cunt throb from the lack of attention, still puffy and drooling from your encounter in the woods.

You lick a firm stripe from his heavy balls to the tip of his engorged purple member, watching it shiver with the affection. There's a salty, brutish taste to him, mixed with the sweet, feminine tang of you, that makes you want to lick him over and over. Rolling the tip of his weighty length into your mouth, you roll it around with your tongue, licking any trace of you and him together away, to be stored in your memories forever.

“Sweet-hearrrt… please!”

He's panting, each short breath firing bursts of air at your cunt. You don't let up, not yet, suckling at his tip, pressing firm kisses to the slit on the tip. He's growling and whining, muscles twitching all over.

There's no way you can take more than a third of his threatening member into your mouth, but you do what you can, stroking firmly with both hands what you cannot take. Spit dribbles out of your mouth and down to your fisted palms, wetting the rest of his length with soaked, messy need.

He roars, lion-like behind you, fingers pressing further bruises into your soft flesh. You don't let up, you can't. You need to make him tremble beneath you; to feel those controlling muscles fold under the feel of your mouth.

The thrust up into your wet lips has you gagging around his length, gargling and spluttering around his thick head. You can't chide him for it, not since the movement sets your insides ablaze with need.

He curls as hard as his spine will allow; the tip of his tongue ghosting over your slick heat. Quivering, you let up on your assault with your mouth, and twist so you can face him. Whines and whimpers expel from his throat as his thick fingers wind around your waist. Before they can contort into growls and snarls, you sink down onto his slippery cock, all the way to the hilt, as if he were the perfect sword to your tight sheath.

“Lay back and relax… There's a good boy.”

Instead of taking control, he gives it to you. A whine, high pitched and needy, rolls out of his mouth.

Bending down, with him still flush inside you, you press your pretty lips against his slathered maw. Open mouthed kisses are pressed onto his jaw, tongue sneaking in and feeling his pointed fangs delicately. He licks purposely into your mouth, dancing against your tensed muscle.

Grinding hard into him, his solid weapon presses harshly against your g spot, stars forming in the corners of your eyes. He sits up so he can lace his thick arms around you, as if he needed to be even closer somehow. Responding in kind, you position your legs around him, holding tight as he thrusts up into you.

Sweat is glistening, dripping down your spine at the proximity of his boiling hot body. Your fingers wind into the thicker fur on his spine as he rocks into you, feeling him in your very core.

Suddenly he's grasping your hips, about to pull you off him. Whining, you shake your head, forcing yourself back down.

“I'mm gonna-”

“I know, please, I need to feel it, fill me up, please!”

Those words are all it takes for Eddie, pushing him over that precipice, free falling into ecstasy. You join him, plummeting into your own release as the feel of his knot consumes you.

For a while you hold each other, the only clue that time had failed to stop being your panting breaths. Your head is snuggled into the soft coat of his neck, his chin resting on the top of your head. As his hardness finally begins to subside you still remain, the sanctitude of the moment ongoing. It feels as if it will be an ongoing memory to play on a loop in the back of your mind, forever.

********************

The following two weeks flew by in a hum buzz of activity. You're pulling shift after shift at the hospital and helping out at the emergency shelter when you can. The town is pulling together, trying to heal and coming to terms with what will forever be a little bit broken.

Eddie's mood has been in a shifting, unstable state since the night he defeated Vecna. The nightmares were the worst part of it; on more than one occasion you've had to physically hit him to get him to wake up and stop thrashing in panic on the bed. You try to soothe with words, soft touches and kindness. It's helping, but you know he's got a long way to go.

Being busy has helped. He and Hopper have come to form an odd friendship. To his credit, Hopper never treated Eddie any different despite his appearance. In fact, he said he's one of ‘Hawkins’ finest upstanding citizens’, since he can't go out and cause trouble. It's not like he can be the town's weed supplier, after all.

Eddie needed something to do. Hopper understood that deeply, he explained, from his own past traumas and grief. So, he started towing cars to the cabin, getting Eddie to fix them up and send them back as an impromptu mechanic. Fixing things and earning a little money have certainly improved his mood. When he wasn't doing that he was working on the cabin which was starting to feel like home.

You're on your way there right now. After the conversation you had with Hopper this morning, a huge smile is glued to your face.

Approaching your home, you see Eddie outside working on a car. When he sees you he bounds over, grabbing the two enormous suitcases you've been struggling with and lifting them with ease.

“What's all… this?”

“Take them inside, I've got some news.”

He does as you ask, depositing them on the floor before he holds you close, snout breathing in your scent at the crook of your neck.

“Eddie, I spoke with Hopper. He's agreed to give us the cabin for nothing. I just gave away my apartment, so I can stay here with you.”

Eddie barks with delight, picking you up and spinning you around. You giggle, holding onto his shoulders. He presses his maw to your tummy, breathing you in.

When he puts you down on the floor, there's a queer look in his eye.

“Eddie, something wrong?”

Shaking his head, he falls to his knees so he can look you in the eyes as he holds both your hands in one enormous paw.

“Not wrrrong… differrrrent. We'll need the cabin, forrr all of us.”

You tilt your head, confused.

“What do you mean? There's only me and you.”

Staring at you as if to gauge your reaction, he presses one bearish hand to your stomach reverently. The hint isn't lost on you, eyes widening in disbelief.

“Eddie, are you saying that you think I'm… pregnant?”

One slow blink.

Legs wobbling, you sit on the floor in front of him.

“I'm on birth control, I mean, surely I can't be… are you sure?”

Eddie taps his nose.

“I'm sure. Is it… a prrroblemm?”

Searching your thoughts you realise it isn't. It really isn't. There's nothing you want more than to spend your life with him, to have a family, no matter what that looks like.

“No, not at all. It's a little… fast, but I want this.”

Holding your cheek with his rough hand, he makes sure you keep your eyes trained on him.

“Are you surrre? What… if it's…”

He gestures to himself, in all his monstrous glory. Cupping his hand on your face, you shake your head.

“I don't care if we have a baby, or a-a cub, or a pup, as long as it's yours and mine.”

He holds you then, softly and close as you twine your fingers into his thick pelt.

A life lies before you, one that you couldn't have possibly predicted. A fairytale life; one where the monster gets the girl, and gets the happily ever after.

Taglist (if you want to be added/removed please PM me)

@liminalpebble @eddies-puppet @rip-quizilla @micheledawn1975 @vanilla-demon @millercontracting @roanniom @josephquinnsfreckles @leelei1980 @mrsjellymunson @usedtobecooler @eddiesprincess86 @ali-r3n

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sinkdownbeneath · 8 months

Text

“Fine By Me.”

Pairing - Daryl Dixon x Trans Masc Reader

Warnings - Talk of drug use, illness, needles, identity, possible transphobia.

Setting - S4 Prison

Summary - Daryl thinks you’re doing drugs, but ends up learning something new about you.

Type - Fluff

A/N: this is my first published fic!! i have briefly proofread, and i’m pretty happy with it. hope you enjoy :)

You sat on the edge of the bed in your cell, positioning the needle over your thigh, gripping at your flesh trying to gauge where to inject yourself. your palms were sweaty and you couldn’t get a good grip on the syringe, with Hershel in Block A, treating the prison flu, you had nobody to do this for you. Hershel had told you the week prior that he would be going to take care of the sick, and he took extra steps in showing you how to inject your medication, but this was the first time you had tried on your own, it was proving difficult.

You took a breath and widened your eyes, grabbing your skin and moving your face closer, trying to get the needle in the perfect spot before you pushed it in, ‘just do it, idiot’ you thought to yourself.

You heard a scoff and jumped, looking up with a surprised expression, Daryl stood at your door, holding the curtain you had put up against the frame.

“Didn’t take you for a fuckin’ junkie.” He said, a scowl across his face.

“What? No! I-“ you began,

“I don’ wanna hear it.” Daryl said, starting to turn away and leave.

“Daryl!” you jump towards him, grabbing his shoulder and spinning him around, he looked taken aback, offended, you weren’t sure, but before he could do or say anything, you grabbed his arm and yanked him into your cell, peering your head around the curtain to check nobody else was witness.

You held the syringe in front of his face, waving it as you annunciated “This is not heroin,” in a whisper-shout.

He looked puzzled and almost like he was challenging you, as if he was asking ‘oh yeah? what is it then?’.

“I am not a junkie, this is my medication! Now if you would give me a hand with sticking it in my thigh I would be grateful.”

You spoke to him in such a way he stood speechless for a moment, like he was a child who just got an angry finger waved in his face for his attitude.

“Well?” You ask, impatiently.

He flushed red for a moment and sheepishly nodded, taking the syringe from your hand, you sat back down and rolled your trouser leg back up, exposing the piercing site, jab marks from the previous weeks lingering.

Daryl sat beside you, needle in hand, inspecting it, and just as you thought he was about to stick you with it, he hesitated.

“Just lemme see whatever you put in here, I don’t wanna be responsible for nothin’.”

It was your turn to hesitate, you scoffed and looked at him, gauging whether he meant it or not, whether he really needed to see why you were secretly medicating yourself every week, when his expression didn’t falter, you reached into the box under your bed, and pulled out the small vial containing your lifeline.

You placed it into his hand, avoiding all eye contact, this man was the one you worried about telling, he wasn’t as loud as Merle was about his opinions, but they were brothers, they were hicks, surely they had their opinion in common?

He rolled the vial in his palm, exposed the small text written on the label, and brought it up to his eye. The bottle read ‘TESTOSTERONE’ in a bold font. Daryl studied it before peering over the bottle and into your eyes, he looked at you almost knowingly, his eyes told you that it was okay, you were okay.

This was the softest look Daryl had ever given you, he had just said so much more with his eyes than you had ever heard from his mouth, it meant a lot.

He gave the bottle back to you, and took the syringe between his teeth, using one hand to move your trouser leg up, and the other to grip a chunk of your flesh, rolling it between the tips of his fingers until the chunk felt right, he took his hand from your trousers and retrieved the needle from his mouth, poking it into you, and pressing down on the plunger at a slow pace.

You watched him, how he nibbled on his lip and furrowed his brow in concentration, how gently he treated you, you watched as he handled you with such care, you looked so deeply into him that you didn’t even realise he had removed the needle. The sudden sound it made when he tossed it onto the table next to your bed startled you awake from your trance, and you found yourself staring at the side of Daryl’s face, his cheeks flushed and his eyes darting to all places other than your eyes.

“Sorry.” You said, he nodded.

“Thank you for doing that.”

“S’alright.”

The silence was so loud.

“How did you learn to do that?” You asked, breaking the silence so suddenly you caught yourself off guard.

“Do wha’?” he questioned, raising a brow and looking at you through his fringe,

“Inject, it seemed like you knew what to do.”

He nibbled on his lower lip again, looking around the room, as if he was trying to find the words.

“My Mama,” he replied, “before the fire, before everythin’, she was sick, I had to give her her medicine sometimes, she was in a lot of pain, kept her in bed all day, smokin’, readin’ her magazines, Merle took care of her when he wasn’t at Dad’s, but sometimes I had ta.”

He kept his eyes on the ground before timidly looking toward you, you looked at eachother for a moment, before you wrapped your arms around his shoulders, hugging him tight, you were telling him it was okay, you were thanking him for not freaking out over you being trans. You were very private about your identity before the world fell, and you thought you would have to be the same now, you had told Hershel very reluctantly, but he told you that God loved you, and that he accepted you, and now Daryl knew, and he treated you with more care and understanding than before. You thought maybe your family, your new, found family, would be okay with it too.

Daryl wrapped his arms around you, and squeezed before pulling away from the hug and standing up by the door.

“Gotta go, Rick needs help with the fence.” he told you, punctuating his sentence with a half smile.

“Okay.”

He turned away and lifted the curtain.

“Daryl?”

“Mm?” He hummed.

“Thank you, I thought-“ You began,

“I know what it’s like. Feelin’ like you don’t belong. What you’re doin’, who you are, is fine by me.”

#daryl dixon #the walking dead #daryl dixon x reader #daryl dixon x male reader #daryl dixon x trans reader #daryl dixon x trans masc reader #twd daryl #twd fic #daryl dixon fic #daryl dixon fanfiction #i love daryl dixon #norman reedus #the walking dead fic #transmasc #daryl dixon fluff

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bugs1nmybrain · 2 months

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Shigaraki's Psychological Conditions Headcanons - (a long ass post)

So, I'll preface this by saying I am NOT a psychiatrist and am not qualified to diagnose shit. I do however have a history of personal mental health disorders and am going to school for mental health work. This is mostly just for theory sake. My word is not absolute

Let's begin

warnings: mental illness as title suggests, not proofread and probably has typos

Antisocial Personality Disorder / Conduct Disorder

This one sort of goes without saying cuz duh he's a villain or whatever. I want to specify that in terms of Antisocial Personality, he likely is a sociopath, NOT a psychopath

I hear people call him a psychopath all the time and it's infuriating because people throw around labels without understanding what they mean. Psychopaths are more cunning and charming, and very manipulative. This isn't to say that Tomura is none of those things. Psychopath, however, applies to people like All For One. Almost diplomatic and very persuasive.

Tomura is a sociopath because he's known for recklessness and abrasive behavior. Psychopaths often pretend to have feelings, but for sociopaths aggression is a key emotion that's visibly displayed. They are also able to feel remorse in some cases, and I run this back to Shigaraki because he spent years in what was implied to be repressed guilt regarding the death of his family. Tomura admits it himself in his flashbacks, but ultimately decides to let go of that guilt (that he still fucking feels and is in DENIAL but that's another post). Hence, his forgiving nature toward his mother and sister when he's dreaming during surgery.

Even after Tomura let that burden go, he has no desire to be cool and collected, he just fucks around and finds out. Overall, though, he disregards people's lives and doesn't have remorse for what he's done because he throws his trauma and desires over it as a bandaid. He does show care and consideration to people in the League, though.

The conduct disorder part of it is self-explanatory. He's a violent criminal, lol.

Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD)

Duh.

Trauma is pretty much all Tomura has known. I won't reiterate his backstory, but being physically abused and rejected as a child, the murder of his family, being blatantly ignored by people on the streets, and AFO's upbringing? That's a lot

His PTSD is so dehibilitating that it took hold of his body language and behavior. Before the end of s5, Tomura was rigid and hunched over. In the MHA video games, he's also seen as very restless and moving his body around (until s4 era in One's Justice 2). I'll attach a video below.

He's also just very irritable and easily set off at the reminders of his trauma and rejection. "I HATE YOU" is a key example, as up to that point Tomura had been improving his rash behavior, but he's very unsettled by his past and continues to be now.

Obsessive Compulsive Disorder

His case of OCD is connected to his trauma and emotions. You'll find that a lot of his conditions feed into one another. For him, he has a variant of dermatillomania (often known as the skin picking disorder). For him, that is in the form of scratching rather than picking. But he does it compulsively and without thought, and he does it in attempts to self soothe. I believe he does it occasionally as a self injurious behavior, resulting in itching himself rather than lashing out. He even just does it when he's only moderately anxious or irritated.

Depression

While we don't see Shigaraki slumped in bed or feeling sad in the ways we see in many cases of depression, his "I hate everything" mentality puts him here. Actually, it's safe to say he experiences anhedonia, which is the lack of enjoyment in anything. He seems to somewhat enjoy video games, but his bio states "nothing" as his likes. I'm inclined to believe he feels no personal joy or happiness, and tries to attain that through murderous rage. Never works tho, does it Tomura?

Bipolar Disorder and Unspecified Psychotic Disorder

This one might stir some debates, but I do genuinely think he has a mood disorder. I don't want to feed into stigma that bipolar and psychotic people are "evil," because I myself have these conditions, so maybe I'm projecting lmao. He's definitely not medicated, and so I'd say his case is Bipolar Type 1. This type is characterized by intense manic symptoms, though depressive symptoms can be severe, too.

Tomura has manic tendencies, and he's impacted by mania in that he seems to get spontaneous motivation, but he also will stay stagnant for some time. I saw this as the case when Spinner literally went at Shiggy for putting the League in a complacent stage, but he's done this before, such as when he was in a slump about Stain. When his motivation surges, though, he goes above and beyond and doesn't put extensive thought into it. He just lunges into his desires in pursuit of satisfaction. He also has delusions of grandoisity to some degree and has a moment where he treats himself as invincible. He fought Gigantomachia for almost two months, and kept fucking going at him. Surely, he could've asked the doctor to call him off, but Tomura wanted that power so bad. Tomura also went into his surgery without asking many questions about it. He makes very impulsive decisions, even after people insist that he "matured." He also gets flicked into motivation like a snap of a finger, and proceeds to be lead mostly by endorphins and gratification.

When Tomura experiences what he perceives as a "positive" emotion, it overtakes him. He becomes pretty much engrossed in his bodily sensations. Through maniacal laughter and taunting language that's charged in a hate induced fuel. When Shigaraki has "voila" moments, he has a surge in neuroactivity and gets into aggressive mood stages, but I guess that could apply to most of the villains. I saw this when Deku told him the difference between him and Stain, and Tomura had a surge in manic-like bliss and drive.

I'm not sure if Tomura hearing the voices of his family before his epiphany was just intrusive thoughts, but I thought they may have been auditory hallucinations. Tomura admits to hearing things that aren't there and seeing visual hallucinations, too. Evidenced by:

I hate how the dub translated this into "when you're this tired" as a broad statement. The manga gives this more personal association to Shigaraki, and he says that it happens when he's sleepy, and doesn't specify if it's only when he's extremely sleep deprived or just tired. Also, him staying up for days on end and smiling his ass off reeks of mania. He has delusional sprinkles in his thinking process, but they're not of bizarre nature, and are usually tied to his trauma. At this point in the manga he's very psychotic, though. That has a lot to do with him being fueled with adrenaline and also just breaking out of AFO's control.

I think he is either bipolar type 1 with psychotic features or has a mild case of schizoaffective disorder. Probably the first one, but I'm not sure.

ADHD (Attention Deficit Hyperactive Disorder)

This one is more of a gut feeling for me, but I see Tomura as being easily distracted and aloof to his surroundings at times. He's fidgety and does shit on whim.

Also, look at his room.

I'm not saying that everyone with ADHD has a messy room, but from what I can see, he goes from one task, drops it entirely without picking up, and goes to the next. Some could argue that Tomura simply doesn't care, and that's true, but he's at least got some decency to put the shit in trash bags. Trash bags that he HASN'T EVEN TAKEN OUT. I think he gets too caught up in the shit he's focused on that it slips his mind to do simple things like that.

He has spontaneous interests from what I can tell from the many books and toys he has that seem to have gone untouched for some time. He also hyperfixates, and I don't mean interest wise. I mean that when he's dwelling on something, it doesn't leave his mind for DAYS, until he gets some gratification. All Might in s1 and Stain s2 for example.

In conclusion, this boy has a grocery list of conditions, but I love Tomura. I love my beautiful prince with a disorder, and he is so dear to me.

I'm open to discussions about this, but please keep them respectful.

#shiggy #shigaraki tomura #shigaraki tomura headcanons #shigaraki headcanons #tomura shigaraki #shigaraki x reader #shimura tenko

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spacexseven · 1 year

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tunaaaaa I've been reading ur Childe Thing sooo much that I've been thinking of I Love Amy aus nonstop. its a problem. in honor of bsd s4 im gonna rapid fire a couple out for the Bsd Boys!

lets talk dazai. I feel like this could go a lot of ways with him. like, if its ada dazai, you probably don't really get the sense that something is kinda off with him until you're a bit too deep to back out. he seemed so sweet when you first met- fuckin weird, but sweet! no harm in trying to help him win over a crush, right? for pm dazai, you obviously know hes fucked in the head the second you meet him, so you agree to help him out of a fear of what he might do to you if you dont rather than a sense of altruism. either way, its kinda hard to notice him getting a little overly-attached to you just cuz of how naturally obnoxious and clingy he is. even if he starts to escalate you might not get it cuz hes pretty fast and loose about LITERALLY kidnapping you and tying you up in his apartment/mafia holding cell right off the bat (gets very pouty about you "ignoring" him). doesnt help that hes so out of touch with his own emotions he probably doesn't even know he has a thing for you for a whiiile. trust me tho, being nice to him and taking care of him when hes sick or injured WILL wear him down. you'll only kind of get it when you try to give him some new pointers on his crush and he seems to just get? annoyed? mutters something about you talking about someone else while you're SUPPOSED to pay attention to HIM. or when he keeps being weirdly affectionate with you in full view of X when hed usually forget you exist as soon as he sees them. or you woke up chained to a chair (again) but this time hes perched in your lap and scolding you about avoiding your "boyfriend" before shoving his lips against yours. couldve been any of these occasions really.

cant BELIEVE I didn't think of gogol the first time I talked about this this is almost EXACTLY what yes doing to sigma rn. when this fuckin 6'2 clown terrorist traps you against a wall and starts questioning about why you were talking to "his darling", you are 10000% sure you're gonna die. almost gives you whiplash how fast his tone changes once you convince him you have NO interest. all smiles all of the sudden, picks u up under the armpits like a cat to right ur posture and pats you on the head, declaring that you will be his magicians assistant for a while! you do not have a say in this, if you'd like to keep your skin. while you feel bad about aiding and abetting this stalking case, you get the sense that hes. not ever gonna actually make a move. kinda just Wants To Stalk. goes on about how he cant let himself be tied down like that (whatever that means). he does talk about just murdering his darling a lot but you've managed to convince him that thats unnecessary baggage connecting them to him so hopefully that keeps him sated until his goldfish-esque attention span finally moves him onto a new target. and it does! the problem is that its you. I think that once he realizes he likes you, he's just gonna vanish. poof gone. hes had a lot of fleeting obsessions with ill-fated darlings before, but youre something new. hes never actually gotten to know someone before! ugh. hes caged by his feelings for you, but the despair hed feel from killing you would be a cage all its own! frustrating!!!!! maybe if he just leaves and never thinks about you ever again this'll just go away like all of his other crushes. doesnt work. expect him back in a month, snuggling into your neck and babbling inane about having missed you. he tied you up again so youre just gonna have to let him do that. its fine youre used to this with him.

really wanted to do this with chuuya and fyodor too but im scared of them being OOC help me.

- 🩹

omg so this turned out to be Very Long :O quick context for any1 who is unfamiliar w i love amy—it's a webtoon (highly recommend btw) where the yandere character starts to fall for her 'target/rival' instead of her initial love interest. for more info + the childe version, check out this post.

cw: yandere characters (dazai, fyodor, nikolai), stalking, kidnapping, imprisonment, obsessive behavior, threats of violence to reader. (this whole post came off a little silly instead of serious But mind the cws anyway!)

this is best read with a male reader (to keep it consistent w i love amy) but there's no pronouns used or descriptions for reader, so do as you like. also, reader makes morally questionable decisions :>

(pm) dazai is to be avoided at all costs. that was the rule you put down for yourself after witnessing one of his very public threats to some poor pedestrian who had bumped into him. the dramatic coat, the blank expression, the natural ease with which he handled the weapon in his hand—everything about him was just...alarming.

however, despite all your efforts, he's obstructed your path home with a deadly glare and a hand in his pocket.

according to dazai, he did not appreciate your recent conversation with X, (as he claimed, they were too popular to spare most people more than a few friendly greetings—so why were you having a full-fledged conversation with them?) who were you, even, to get in his way? you sputter out some excuse, some explanation as to why he misunderstood the situation and it was all just work-related, and fortunately, he seems convinced, at least enough to relax his hold on you and shift the blaring malice in his stance to something less frightening.

obviously, you couldn't refuse when he offers you what he calls a mutually beneficial proposition. you help him get closer to X, and he won't kill you! win-win, don't you think?

the thing about dazai, you soon learn, is that despite the murderous energy he gives off, he's painfully annoying, more so than frightening. it almost feels like you're dealing with an obnoxious child, with how he's constantly whining and tugging at your sleeve and complaining about how useless you're being.

and it also makes you wonder if he's ever really had a friend, because he's got some strange expectations for you. he's all too possessive, too paranoid, and expects you to be perfectly fine with it. you consider telling him that he's not supposed to hold you hostage every time he thinks you're spending "too much time with someone else", but after the 4th attempt, you've understood that there was no getting to him. at least he stopped with the threats to your other friends (well, he promised you that he'd stop), and that seemed like the only thing he was willing to compromise on. he doesn't ease up on the breaking-into-your-room-to-visit-you stunt, either, especially when you're "ignoring him". despite all that, maybe out of some form of pity, you still help him out. you drop off food when he's sick and try to explain that imprisonment is not the key to a healthy relationship. you hang out with him even if you're terrified of all the mafioso you come across when you visit the hq with him, and after all of it, you're mostly convinced that he wasn't going to kill you anytime soon. in fact, the two of you seemed to be building an unusual friendship.

but when he comes to visit you one day when you're sick and actually knocks on the door and texts you beforehand, you tell him that this would be the best way to approach X if he ever hears that they're sick. though you're expecting some excitement, or some self-satisfaction for improving a little, instead of looking excited, dazai looks frustrated. for the first time, he looks genuinely...upset. and when he asks you why you can't appreciate that he was looking out for you and not X, you're left at a loss for words. you're not sure if this was a sign that he was starting to learn not to cross your boundaries or a warning that he was beginning to like you a little too much

and things only get stranger. he becomes more observant, asks you more questions about yourself rather than X, and even starts holding your hand in full view of X. when you mention that X was really looking forward to a new movie coming out and that he should try to ask them out, he gets upset by your suggestion, grumbling about you paying more attention to X and only caring about them instead of asking him if he wants to see the movie with them. so, unsure of how to respond, you echo his question. he beams at you and happily declares that he only wants to watch the movie with you.

somewhere along the line, it happened that dazai himself started to realize just how much he liked you, and he spirals out of control. the already overwhelming physical contact turns more intimate, with dazai holding your hand at every possible moment, pressing himself as close to you as humanely possible without squeezing the air out of you, and sitting on your lap whenever the opportunity presents itself. he stops responding to anything that isn't an endearing pet name and introduces himself as your boyfriend. X seems to be eradicated from his mind, as well as anyone that wasn't you, though it feels as though you're the only one that has a problem with this change. dazai takes to it naturally, seamlessly inserting himself into your life.

"what's wrong?" dazai's sprawled across your lap with the biggest grin on his face, the remote in your hand long ripped away by him, "come give your boyfriend a kiss~"

you've...heard of fyodor. it was more overhearing whispers shared between people, but the mention of his name seemed to intrigue everyone who heard it. you've heard that he was a mysterious man who walked into the city one day and never left, and you've heard that he was the owner of an expensive casino. you've even heard that he had a tendency to stand on top of rooftops at night, but you've heard tons of variations and rumors. one statement, however, rang true in everyone's ears.

fyodor dostoevsky was taken with X.

that was putting it lightly—obsession was exactly what it was. though X was clearly unaware of what was being said, because, as they assured you one day while you walked out with them, fyodor was just a friend! and he was a very interesting guy, with some strong beliefs. he wasn't some criminal mastermind! all he did was keep to himself. and that, as they confidently declared, wasn't a crime.

but you had reason to not believe X, after all, it wasn't them at the receiving end of a laser focused gaze and a creepy smile. (it scared you so much that you ran home and ordered a burglar-proof lock for your door the same night) and it also wasn't them who sat down across from you while you were having your breakfast in the café nearby. anyone would have been better than who it was.

"hello," fyodor waves a fork at you, his fingers positioned gracefully on the silver cutlery (and of course, you think bitterly, he was evil and beautiful. just your luck), "i hope you can spare me a few minutes."

he wasn't asking, but you melted at his soft tone. for all people loved to talk about him, why hadn't they mentioned how hard it was to take your eyes off him? awkwardly, you take another bite of your food, nodding at him.

he asks you about X, though it's more of an interrogation disguised as casual conversation. he easily waves around his fork, smiles at you with an unnerving expression, and stares at you a little too long. by the end of it, your food is finished and his fork is placed neatly back onto the table and you've sustained no injuries. better yet, he finally seems to have (reluctantly) removed your name from his hit list.

what you weren't expecting was for him to start seeking you out. you get strange looks when fyodor waits outside your workplace with an umbrella—your umbrella—leaving you with no choice but to walk with him unless you wanted to get home soaked. he lists off X's habit and asks you to add on to his list, ignoring your reply of "that's just creepy". he tells you that he wants to respect X's privacy by not using cameras to spy on them so will you answer him or should he use the cameras? and what else could you do then?

at the very least, he didn't seem serious about attempting to kidnap or imprison X. he seemed fascinated by them, if anything. like he was...studying them. being with him wasn't as bad as you'd though, no matter how much you hated to admit it, despite the foundation of this friendship was built on how amusing he found X. if he was in a particularly good mood, he'd even offer to help you out with your struggles in the pursuit of love. his ideas, however, were all sure to land you behind bars with a retraining order to boot. when you voiced your opinion to him, he only smiled and told you that he knew a thing or two about breaking out of a prison cell, much like he was recalling upon a fond memory.

the only good thing about this strange arrangement was that fyodor was really nice to look at. there was something mesmerizing about his every action, even the slight quirk of his lips or the way his hair fell on his forehead. the ease with which he slipped on his hat (which, by the way, what was with all his not-weather-appropriate clothing? was he not sweating?), and the commanding air around him. so while he spoke seriously about X and his distaste for most of the human population, you tuned him out and focused on admiring his pretty eyes and how his lips wrapped around his fork and—ugh, you were starting to sound as creepy as him. but honestly, you had a feeling he already knew that you found him attractive. fyodor was far too good at reading people, far too perceptive to let something as obvious as your attraction to him slip.

your mistake was foolishly believing that you'd be safe as long as you didn't act on those feelings.

it felt strange, however, when he started reaching your usual table first, having already asked for your go-to meal and watching with thinly veiled delight as you stared down at the hot plate. and it's your coworkers now that get stared at, your friends who get the silent threat of a fork pressed against smooth skin, and you that everyone whispers that fyodor dostoevsky is taken with.

the meaning behind his increasingly strange behaviour doesn't really hit you, not until you've bumped into X again, who you haven't seen around in a while.

"i see that you and fyodor are becoming good friends now," they grin, "i'm almost jealous of how quickly you warmed up to him."

long fingers reach to caress your cheek before a perfectly poised hand places itself on your shoulder. fyodor's unmistakable voice replies in your stead.

"we're friends? is that what you've heard?" fyodor dips his head down to lock eyes with yours, "why don't you correct them about that, darling?"

you should have trusted sigma when he told you that nikolai gogol was bad news. as he clarified, so bad that, coincidentally, the ministry of justice hq was moved away at least by two states when nikolai came to visit.

but how were you to know that he was in love with one of your acquaintances? and how were you to know that his idea of love was this frightening? just when you were making your way back after a lukewarm conversation about work with X, you were slammed up against the wall by a person with a top hat and a coat and an honestly terrifying expression. then nikolai, as he later introduced himself, started grilling you with questions, ruthlessly asking about why you were with X and why did they smile at you and where does your family live, after which he happily told you about his many previous experiences with torture and how he would love to show you.

you're not sure what convinced him to let you go, whether it was your trembling legs or your teary promises that you had no interest in X in that way, but here you were now—alive, terrified, and offered the position of 'magician's assistant' (though the magician himself refused to tell you why the position was open for so long) and all it took to land the increasingly strange job was to talk to X and listen to nikolai threaten to torture you in graphic detail.

(among all the crazy people you had seen around here—that so-called 'world's best detective' who snatched your bag of candy right from your hands, that other person who started doing push-ups in the middle of the road, and someone giggling holding a bag of lemons by the port—you thought that nikolai definitely fit right in. not that you were going to tell him that)

while the position wasn't exactly what you wanted, nor were you too keen on spending more time around nikolai, something about the glint in his uncovered eye and the hand gripping your shoulder told you that you really wouldn't want to reject his offer. contrary to what you may have assumed, assisting nikolai only meant becoming a partner to his criminal activity, which revolved around stalking X, talking to them to find out all the information nikolai can't get by stalking them, and stalking them even more to find out any more details that neither of you could get. (you've considered helping out as much as you can, leaving hints in the form of obscure drawings of nikolai and danger symbols, but later, when you catch sight of X waving to him, you realize the message did not come across the way you intended it to)

fortunately for them, (and for you. at least now, you won't be behind bars for assisting in abduction) nikolai seems to have no interest whatsoever in pursuing them any further. sure, he keeps books filled with information about X, and buys their favorite drink alongside his order, but he doesn't seem to want to do anything more.

while you could care less about why he does whatever he's doing, already chalking it all up to the fact that he was off his rockers, nikolai decides to enlighten you all the same. when he excitedly rambles on and on about freedom and feelings and why X must now die, you pretend to listen, never actually telling him that nothing he said made any sense to you. still, after insisting that he won't be very free behind bars either and that if he really didn't want to be tied down by his feelings, he should actually distance himself from them instead, it appeared that you finally got him to understand, and he hesitantly agreed to listen.

for the most part, everything is great after that. your life returns to normal, with no top hat wearing, cane wielding magician in the vicinity, and no more having to invade someone's privacy. and it was great! really! even if it was a little bit boring without nikolai's spontaneous plans (maybe that time in the amusement park was pretty fun, even if the only reason you had to go was because X was going there with someone else, much to nikolai's horror). there was something both unsettling and addictive about the crazy adventures nikolai swept you on, though it was for the best that he disappeared.

but then nikolai came back…acting a little odd.

his clinginess and a sudden desire for physical affection set off alarms in your head, though he acted like this was perfectly normal. at first, you told yourself that this must be some new jealousy plot—maybe he got this idea from a tv show he watched over his 'break', but he hadn't asked you if you wanted to be part of this ploy (not that he ever did, really).

and your suspicions only grew when he refused to let up on the act, holding onto you as if his life depended on it. his trips with you became increasingly frightening, and his grip on you increasingly tighter. he takes his new position by your side, not at all focused on X anymore, and instead observes you with the same look that was fixated on X not too long ago.

it only hits you that you've become his new target when you find yourself tied up to a chair, with him seated right in front of you with his face up to yours. the exact scenario you convinced him not to put X through.

"your advice sucks, by the way," he pouts, "i tried staying away but i couldn't stop thinking of you! don't be too upset, alright? we can have even more fun now that we're together!"

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another-lost-mc · 1 year

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black & white

humans live in a world of black and white until they meet their soulmate.

pairing: solomon x gn!reader

sfw | soulmates au | angst with a happy ending

cw: jealousy, story spoilers for s3 + s4, events that take place in alternate/future timelines (including: violence, solomon and mc raising a child together, implied character injury/death)

Solomon lives in a world of black and white.

When he was a human king trying to satiate his lust for power, he expected one of his many spouses would turn out to be his soulmate and his world would burst with colour - but it never happened. By the time his spouses reached triple-digit figures, he only felt resigned acceptance that he may never meet his soulmate.

He pretends not to be disappointed by that truth, but he is.

He collects demons and harnesses their strength, building his wealth and influence beyond measure, but none of his earthly and otherworldly gains are able to fully soothe the emptiness he feels. When he stumbles upon his own immortality, he has no expectation now that he’ll ever meet his soulmate - he considers it a punishment for the life he’s lived.

He creates a potion that simulates the illusion of colour, and a small rune on the inside of his wrist warns him when the potion’s effect is fading. There are times when he sees the colours blurring to nothing at the edge of his vision, the rune etched on his skin slowly disappearing.

Some mornings he wakes up, filled with unmeasurable loneliness when the world has returned to a landscape of grey. When he stumbles into his alchemy lab, he grasps the small vial of potion in his hand - and in a fit of frustration, he flings it against the wall. He does this more than he cares to admit, stupefied by the one obstacle he has yet to overcome, but he slumps into his chair and reforms the vial with a muttered incantation. Eventually he stops letting the potion’s effect fade at all, drinking it like clockwork to avoid waking up to the dull, grey reality that plagues his dreams.

The centuries pass by and he studies magical anomalies in the world, testing the limits of his own power and brilliance. Sometimes it’s easier to associate with demons and angels than other humans - their races aren’t impacted by the curse of soulmates, and they don’t pity him the way human witches or sorcerers sometimes do. The Devildom in particular is a rich, vibrant world he can lose himself in, indulging in his sins without shame and exploring his magic without limitations.

When he meets you during the Devildom exchange program, it feels like the first genuine human friendship he’s had in a very long time. You captivate him in ways he can’t articulate, but he watches the demons and angels around you slowly succumb to your charms and enthusiasm. He hates to admit that you’ve lured him in as easily as the others, but he decides he’s simply one of many and thinks nothing of it, shoving unrequited feelings for you deep down where he can pretend they don’t exist.

Sometimes his heart betrays him and he thinks about you - romantic thoughts, desperate thoughts - but he’s used to ignoring the pang of longing that makes his heart clench. The truth he tells himself is that you’re already lost to him, destined to find your perfect soulmate one day while he hopes he never has to witness it.

He tries to keep his distance from you but it’s a challenge, especially after you’ve become a fully-fledged sorcerer and you travel freely between the Devildom and human world at will. After so many lifetimes of doing things alone, he can’t resist the temptation to invite you along while he carries out his duties as the human world’s would-be guardian. More and more often these days, you seek him out, wanting his wisdom or expertise - or sometimes you just want his company - and he is too selfish to say no.

One morning Solomon wakes up and it seems like a typical day - it’s only later that afternoon he happens to glance at his wrist and sees that one of his runes is missing. The fact that the world is still colourful and vibrant as ever makes him panic even more than if he had woken up to a world of black and white. Now that he thinks about it, he can’t remember the last time he drank that potion.

Solomon makes a list of all the hypothetical scenarios that can explain what happened, but he keeps drawing the same conclusion: he met his soulmate and didn’t realize it. It’s difficult to pinpoint when he stopped drinking the potion and almost impossible to narrow down the list of potential soulmates he met before that time.

He knows Barbatos doesn’t use his powers freely at Diavolo’s request, but having a pact with him does come in handy for situations like this. Barbatos hesitates when Solomon nearly begs him to take him back into the past. Barbatos finally obliges, having been granted Diavolo’s permission just this once; Solomon’s not sure what Barbatos did to persuade him, but he knows better than to ask.

Barbatos leads Solomon to his private chambers and through a portal so that they can watch his life zoom by in reverse. Barbatos’s ability isn’t impacted by the effects of Solomon’s potion so identifying the moment his world shifts from greyscale to colour is his only clue. Solomon sees the day - nearly two weeks ago - when he last drank the potion, but the colour lingers as Barbatos searches long before that, months of time passing by without any signs of change.

At last the world seems to darken for a moment, and Barbatos pauses his spell when Solomon’s vision suddenly reverts to black and white. Solomon stares at the scene before him: having just introduced himself to you at RAD, you shake his hand while a glimmer of curiosity shines in both your eyes. Colour bleeds into the world when your hands touch.

Barbatos glances at Solomon who’s grown silent, apparently oblivious to the grin on his face and the tears falling from the corners of his eyes. Solomon chuckles, feeling close to bursting with the same happiness he only ever feels when he’s with you.

It suddenly makes sense: all those times when he felt drawn to you even though you seemed so ordinary; his suspicions that turned to fear when he realized your powers were wreaking havoc on the three realms, threatening to kill you both; your eager acceptance to become his apprentice, and his unmatched pride when you succeeded.

He doesn’t want to think about all those times he watched your other friends - demon and angel alike - crowd you for your attention, their unsuccessful bids to win your heart for their own, the way you accepted their casual touches and how much Solomon despised every moment of it—

Solomon turns to Barbatos who has conjured a portal to return them both to his room in the Demon Lord’s castle. “Why didn’t they say anything?” Solomon asks out loud, but mostly to himself. But then he remembers something you said a long time ago, one of the only times you spoke together about the human phenomenon of soulmates:

“I’ve always been able to see colour, but I couldn’t figure out why. People thought it was strange, so it was easier to pretend I couldn't,” you said with a shrug. “Simeon thinks it’s because I’m an angel’s descendent since they don’t have soulmate colour blindness the way humans do. I hope when I meet my soulmate, they’ll be able to tell me.”

Solomon can’t help but ask Barbatos before he leaves, “Did you know?”

Barbatos meets his curious gaze with a guarded expression of his own; he thinks back to a time long ago when he debated entering a pact with Solomon. He wanted to judge the sorcerer first, and like so many times before, he used his power to glimpse into Solomon’s future, one that was murky with endless possibilities due to the nature of his immortality.

Among those possibilities were visions of a sorcerer burdened by grief:

Solomon walking away from your wedding, the celebration of your marriage to someone that’s not him, dropping the forced smile from his face when he turns his back and disappears like a shadow into the darkness Engaged in battle in defense of the three realms, Solomon catches fleeting glimpses of you weaving defensive spells to protect your allies, but you don’t notice the enemy assassin approaching you from behind until it’s too late– Solomon standing beside your grave, his eyes dull and his world grown desolate once more in your absence Solomon, who raises his glass in a fake toast, sipping his drink and smiling bitterly before the reaper in front of him cleaves the soul from his body at last—

Despite the memories that served as a warning to him, Barbatos also remembers the other possibilities with more clarity than any others, a sorcerer filled with happiness and purpose and love:

Solomon dancing with you, holding your hands in his own, both of you dressed in the finest wedding attire, and the demons and angels around you cheering Solomon feeding a baby some foul concoction he made himself, oblivious to your horrified expression when the baby giggles happily at the taste Solomon holding a toddler on his lap while he reads, explaining rudimentary summoning circles to the small child as he bounces them on his knee Solomon is standing by your side, both of you watching in disbelief as your child rides Cerberus around like an oversized horse; the demon brothers give chase and take pictures while Lucifer supervises with an amused twinkle in his eyes The child you and Solomon raised, grown up and a fully fledged sorcerer too, grinning when they introduce their own soulmate to their parents for the first time

“I know many things,” is the demon's cryptic response, and his dangerous smile warns Solomon not to pry any further. Their business concluded, Barbatos disappears back to his master's side, leaving Solomon to contemplate his next move in peace.

Solomon wastes no more time, pulling out his DDD as he walks out of the castle and he sends you a message: “Care to join me for dinner tonight?” Barely a minute passes before his DDD pings with your enthusiastic reply.

For the first time in a long time, Solomon lets himself feel hope.

read more: solomon masterlist | obey me! masterlist

#obey me #obey me solomon #obey me x reader #obey me solomon x reader #solomon x reader #obey me angst #obey me au #soulmates au #gn!reader #x reader

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thisisthem · 1 year

Photo

Infant Skin Set N2 & Child Skins N25, N26 & N27

This set includes :

Infant Skin N4 (2v/ 40 swatches/ Overlay 5 swatches) ;

Infant Skin N5 (2v 30 swatches/ Overlay 3 swatches) ;

Infant Skin N6 (2/ 40 swatches/ Overlay 4 swatches) ;

Child Skin N25 (2v/ 40 swatches/ Overlay 5 swatches) ;

Child Skin N26 (2v/ 30 swatches/ Overlay 3 swatches) ;

Child Skin N27 (2v/ 40 swatches/ Overlay 4 swatches) ;

With/without eyebrows versions ;

Work with toddlers ;

HQ compatible ;

Custom Thumbnails ;

Skin Details Category ;

Don't re-upload or claim as your own. Don't modify without permission.

Photos taken with HQ Mod. Sliders used.

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pillowspace · 8 months

Note

Do you have any tma fic recs?

I am kissing your hand, thank you so much for asking. Let me go take a look through my AO3 bookmarks and see what I still remember reading

Here's some The Magnus Archives fics I like! Some Jonmartin fics, regular fics, and a little Gerrymichael section because I like that

Okay, so first of all, this is my favourite The Magnus Archives fic of all time. I cannot recommend it enough. It has entirely rewired my brain, I have not been the same since I read this. I cried multiple times:

Resigned, Though Not to Fate by inkfingers_mcgee

Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Martin Blackwood/Jonathan "Jon" Sims | The Archivist

“You’re really suggesting this,” Martin says, voice pulled thin.

“Yes.” No hesitation.

“You would- actually do it?”

“I would.”

“With me.”

“Yes, Martin.”

“Why?” Because love is blind, says something cliché and cruel in the pit of his gut. Christ, he never was much of a poet, was he?

Or,

When Jon asks Martin to Quit the Archives with him, Martin says yes. Things don't go as planned. In the Scottish Highlands, they hurt, and they heal.

(Re-written as of 22-12-27; see chapter 9 for more info.)

T | Words: 145,746 | Chapters: 9/9

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And there's also these good ones I've enjoyed:

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a deeply annoying child by ajkal2

No Archive Warnings Apply, Jonathan "Jon" Sims | The Archivist & Tim Stoker, blink-and-you-miss-it Martin Blackwood/Jonathan Sims, BUT NO SLASH WHILE ANYONE IS A CHILD

Jon is hiding under the desk.

----

There's a child in the Archives, who shouldn't be there.

G | Words: 9,631 | Chapters: 1/1

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rituals by doomcountry

No Archive Warnings Apply, Martin Blackwood/The Archivist, Martin Blackwood/Jonathan Sims

Martin is the first person to knock on the Archivist's door since it arrived, fully, into its little waiting temple. The Archivist saw him coming from down the hall, but decides to feign interest when the knob turns, and Martin—still a little bit smaller, a little more translucent than before—stands uncertainly just outside the room.

T | Words: 8,492 | Chapters: 1/1

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Head in the Lion's Mouth by renwhit

Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Danny Stoker & Tim Stoker, Danny Stoker & Jonathan Sims, Basira Hussain & Alice "Daisy" Tonner, Martin Blackwood & Tim Stoker, Martin Blackwood & Danny Stoker, Jonathan Sims & Tim Stoker, Past Tim Stoker/Sasha James, Danny Stoker & Helen Richardson, Danny Stoker & Alice "Daisy" Tonner, Danny Stoker & Melanie King, Basira Hussain & Tim Stoker, Basira Hussain & Danny Stoker

He fell into a deep bow, smiling the whole while. “I’m the ringmaster, of course.”

“Is that skin— Is it yours?” Old wood groaned as the Archivist shifted his weight. “Originally.”

“It is!” the ringmaster said as he swooped back upright. “Nikola decided I wore it well, so she let me keep it. Why do you ask?”

The Archivist gave him another once-over. “You just… you look familiar. Like someone I know.”

On relearning, reconnecting, and redefining.

M | Words: 157,240 | Chapters: 17/17

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Reflection by LazuliQuetzal

No Archive Warnings Apply, Martin Blackwood/Jonathan Sims, Sasha James/Emma (The Magnus Archives)

Jonathan Sims, researcher at the Magnus Institute, is seeing a ghost. Of himself.

Of course, it’s not really him, no matter what secrets it knows, or how many arguments it brings up. So if it tells him to do something?

Obviously, he’ll be doing the exact opposite.

(AKA: Jon is an idiot, past and future, but somewhere along the way it all cancels out.)

(Expect general spoilers for S4 and specifically, MAG 158.)

T | Words: 51,527 | Chapters: 10/10

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Out There, Somewhere by Artyphex

No Archive Warnings Apply, Martin Blackwood/Jonathan "Jon" Sims | The Archivist

"I'm sorry, you were found alone."

Jon survived the apocalypse and now will go to the end of this new, unfamiliar world to find Martin again.

T | Words: 54,080 | Chapters: 8/8

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Clutching Daffodils by Gemi

Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Martin Blackwood/Jonathan Sims

Martin has always liked the idea of love at first sight.

It’s such a romantic idea, the whole thing of it. Seeing someone and instantly feeling that strange, twisting feeling deep inside that every single media likes to obsess over. Of knowing you are in love within the day, petals falling from your mouth and warmth filling your chest as love burrows deep, vines twisting through your lungs.

He always liked the idea of it.

And then Jonathan Sims starts working at the Magnus Institute.

NR | Words: 7,624 | Chapters: 1/1

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Beastly Behaviour by Prim_the_Amazing

Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Martin Blackwood/Jonathan Sims

“You need to learn a lesson,” she says, and there’s blood speckling her lips now. She’s overstraining herself. He needs to stop her, calm her down. “And until you learn it you will suffer, just like you’ve made me suffer.”

“Mum, I think you need to--”

It turns out that when his father had called his mother a witch, he had meant more than Martin realized.

NR | Words: 73,226 | Chapters: 28/28

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dustsceawung by callmearcturus

No Archive Warnings Apply, Martin Blackwood/Jonathan "Jon" Sims | The Archivist

Martin had always been favored by the summer courts, and moving up north to the little village of Lacuna is a difficult adjustment. It's rainy and lonely and everyone seems to have a strange, distant relationship with the local faerie court.

However: there is a strange man in a cloak who walks past Martin's remote little cottage every few days.

However: there is a moth that keeps getting stuck in Martin's house during the rain.

These events are not as disconnected as they first appear.

M | Words: 38,269 | Chapters: 8/8

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Gerrymichael fics I like:

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Break Me Like A Pattern by TheLibraryBat

Graphic Depictions Of Violence,,Gerard Keay & Michael Shelley, Gerard Keay/Michael Shelley, Gerard Keay & Gertrude Robinson, Gertrude Robinson & Michael Shelley

The year is 2011. Michael Shelley is living his life in circles, blissfully unaware of the betrayal that awaits him in the summer. Gertrude Robinson has plans to enact and plans to destroy. Emma Harvey is hiding a book in the dark place at the back of a cupboard.

When Gerard Keay walks into the Magnus Institute - two years sooner than he was meant to - everything changes.

This is an (eventual) Archivist Michael AU, exploring how certain events might have played out, had one key player been in the wrong place at the wrong time.

M | Words: 215,291 | Chapters: 40/40

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This entire series is so good, all 4 works in it:

As One Door Closes by dramatispersonae

Words: 64,859 | Works: 4

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Choke Chain by dramatispersonae

Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Gerard Keay/Michael, Gerard Keay/The Distortion

Things Gertrude Robinson possesses: decades of experience killing, containing, and otherwise thwarting supernatural beings, an uncompromising drive to destroy the Rituals and the people who would see them completed, Gerry's loyalty. Things Gertrude Robinson apparently also possesses: a monster on a magic leash.

NR | Words: 14,814 | Chapters: 1/1

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Echo Chamber by orphan_account

Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death, Gerard Keay/Michael, Gerard Keay/Michael Shelley

“Look, if you’re another, uh, avatar of a horrible eldritch demon god come to assassinate me in a spooky manner, could you get it over with quickly? I haven’t eaten all morning and I’m starving.”

The thing that calls itself Michael stares.

“And this sandwich cost most of my weekly salary,” Gerry adds after a belated moment.

T | Words: 21,439 | Chapters: 1/1

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Please Don’t Eat the Flowers by Sloane

Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Gerard Keay/Michael Shelley, Gerard Keay/Michael | The Distortion, Razor/Wendy, Minor or Background Relationship(s)

Instead of retiring to open a book shop, Gerry ends up working at a flower shop run by American lesbians in London. This leads to a brush with the Distortion, who just wants to buy some lilies, the Magnus Institute finding out he’s still alive, and... well, a normal life was never really in the cards for the likes of Gerard Keay, was it?

Oh, and those lesbians who run the flower shop? There’s more to them than meets the eye—bad Beholding pun intended.

(No knowledge of Maniac Mansion required; I take lots of liberties to slot it into TMA’s universe. UNDER MAJOR REVISIONS. Please see last chapter if you’re a new/returning reader for details..)

M | Words: 77,314 | Chapters: 33/?

#i haven't read THAT many tma fics sadly! but these are still plenty. i picked out my fsvourites from what i have read #the magnus archives #tma #jonmartin #gerrymichael #doorkeay #ask #fic rec #fic recs

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sarcasticscribbles · 7 months

Text

I made a curious cat and people been asking about my designs so I thought I would share it here too If you have any question too you can send it here or over on curious cat!

Under cut is a very long monologue about some design choices regarding my s1 gang, Gerry and some avatars!

S1: Jon, Martin, Sasha and Tim

Right off the bat I'll admit I had seen TMA fanart before, but I assumed it was a game from how consistent designs are (Jon and Martin); however when I started I avoided fanart (but I am not immune to TMA fanon designs). I'll explain S1 gang, they are my favourites. I find fcs helpful to keep them consistence.

Jon: I have a basic Jon design: short, brown man with long hair and glasses. Jon has a put together façade but, he wasn't qualified for the archivist position, and he doesn't know what he's doing. Therefore, I like him with longer hair he can't care for, therefore messy. It gets longer with the seasons and adding on all the marks he gains from the entities. I gave him half-moon, golden glasses with chains holding two eyes. I like to think it's a Beholding artefact, so Gertrude wore them before him. I used to have Dev Patel as a reference for him, but I've switched over to Riz Ahmed!

Martin: Very basic: fat man with fluffy hair and glasses. When I heard his voice, I thought of Harvey Guillén, who stayed a reference for Martin's body. I pictured him in a dorky attire; round glasses, ginger, comfy yet business appropriate clothing. I added eyes in the pattern of his jumper and added freckles. I've recently play around adding a beard, because I think he wants to look older than he is (re: CV; "I'm only 29!") but haven't found a style I like. I keep him fat throughout the series, instead of him losing weight s4.

Sasha: She has some canon traits: tall, long hair and glasses. I draw her hair up to stay out of her face. Contra Jon, I think she was more qualified for the archivist position, so Gertrude started preparing her for the role. She wears an eye necklace I draw Gertrude wearing that's in the same style as Jon's glasses. She has a matching bracelet with Tim and overall is one of my favourites. (notSasha): I took what was established and flipped it; short, short hair, no glasses. I imagine notthem could pass as cousins (since they still need traits to the victim's family?); no immediate resemblance but with a few traits of the original.

Tim: Canonically described as hot so I have my own bias. I started with general attractive traits: tall and fit. I think he puts a lot into his appearance. I use Keanu Reeves as a reference, and he works great for him. He’s a hair guy, gets it professionally cut and owns expensive products, skincare routine and dresses in fitted clothing. His standard is a shirt with an eye pattern. He takes pride in his appearance, so S2’s worm scars troubled him. He stops shaving to let it heal properly but they never go away. He never liked looking at them and they are a cruel reminder of the past (however, one scar splits his eyebrow to x2 bisexuality). S3 he stopped caring about putting in effort, the stubble grew into a beard and his clothes aren't fitted. He loses muscles, gains weight, and isn’t who he was in S1.

Gerard Keay

I had just assumed Eric was hispanic (for some reason) and then I connected that he's Gerry's dad, and apparently I headcanon him half hispanic lol

But it was why I wanted to draw the Mama family portrait to play with genetics. Letting his dad be rather tall, tan with dark curly hair and Mary be ginger with paler skin; Gerry's pale, ginger with curly hair as a child. He grew up looking like Mary and started altering his appearance to be more like his dad; dyed dark hair and taking some of Eric's clothing (I also gave both a beauty mark under their eye he'll highlight despite wearing make up). Alternative scenes and goths tend to straighten their hair but I let Gerry have naturally wavy to still resemble his dad more. I tried to give him trad goth make up, mainly looking at Siouxsie Sioux in the late 70s. And a fun bonus to have his hair often cover one eye because, The Eye

Gerry cared for his dad, even if he died when he was a toddler (if I remember correctly). Gerry's chosen name is the nickname Eric referred to him as, which is also where my trans headcanon comes in (afab). I haven't thought it out fully, or how that reflects on other characters since everyone else calls him Gerard but I think there's some symbolising there having a chosen name relating back to Eric

(some) Avatars

Oliver Banks: "the Egyptians believed the most significant thing you could do in your life was die,"; I take inspiration from Ancient Egypt for my Oliver design! He wears an Ankh around his neck, but I want to look into more about Egyptian death symbolism (he has a cross too, but I'll probably remove it for future designs). I've also taken some inspiration from Nordic mythology, with Hel (Hela In English? Loki's daughter (not Marvel) ) as half his face is beautiful, and the other is a corpse (skull). I don't wanna mix too many cultures just for the sake of it, but it was a really fun design decision. And he's goth. Bonus death aligned I next time I draw Georgie I'll draw inspiration from the Death's-head hawkmoth

The Distortions: Michael's 60s and Helen's 80s inspired, no reason, just vibes. I like to think of Michael as a spiral while Helen's a twist, if that makes sense, I've been meaning to draw them together to demonstrate, but I'll include a doodle of it

Jane Prentiss: I looked into a lot of paganism, and fell into a rabbit hole. She's described as a modern witch, so I wanted a subtle alternative look with a shaved side and gauges. One of her breasts are exposed because (boobs) in old pagan traditions a lot of rituals were performed nude, to be closer to nature. A lot of pagan art has a very strong feminine force, I want for Prentiss. She has one eye, but I'll probably remove the other too, I've seen a lot of people do for more holes

Nikola Orsinov: Drag king. Because we need more of those. I love drag so Nikola's has a mix of both male and female attributes since he's just trying to imitate a human. Their design is also inspired The Toy Soldier in the mechanisms (haven't listened? To it but a lot of people pointed me to that designing Nikola!) that's also her actor Jessica Law! I put all my gender into Nikola lol, and when I can sneak an IT reference in I will

Breekon and Hope: Wario and Waluigi

Annabelle Cane: She's described having web keeping her skull together, but for some reason I imagined it to be down her neck. So I pictured her head occasionally falling off and being restored by a web. So I gave her both lol. Her vintage style is old, goth Hollywood glam to me and I love looking at reference for her

Bonus Agnes: I haven't drawn her fully, but I wanna take inspiration from Scandinavian culture, think Midsommar (both the movie and the tradition) and maybe Norse paganism. I love Agnes story and how it's only told by other people, and her relationship with Gertrude is so interesting!

#tma #the magnus archives #mag #jonathan sims #martin blackwood #tim stoker #sasha james #gerry keay #gerard keay #oliver banks #jane prentiss #nikola orsinov #the distortion #michael shelley #helen richardsson #agnes montague #annabelle cane #breekon and hope

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dorims · 2 months

Text

make you fix me [ sneak peak ]

gif creds @/endiness

roman roy x therapist!reader

wc. ~550

genre. fluff, angst,

spiraling into a more than confusing dynamic, roman roy's relationships have always disrupted the balance between professionalism and an HR complaint. It wasn't his fault his authentic-roy-ways didn't follow the 'being a decent human being' guidebook. People fell in love with their therapists all the time anyway, and being a nepo-baby billionaire didn't save him of that fate.

tags. WORKING TITLE, NO BETA AS OF RN, prone to grammar mistakes !! the story is set some time after s4 as of rn, gif is not representative of the timeline this takes place in, allusions to abuse, being dismissive of therapy, roman uses the word looney as an insult once, tags will be added as the story progresses, these are mainly for the text below the cut

a/n. this is a little sneak peak of one my wips! the full document has 3.5k words ish but im aiming for at least 7k, maybe a little more. if anyone wants to join the tag list for this fic please send me an ask off anon or with your url

“Are you writing that down?” He frowned, “why are you writing that down? I literally just said I wasn’t.”

Yet again, another bold demonstration of your therapeutic ineptitude. You dared to look up at him for a couple of seconds too long, scanning him over until his eyes widened in confusion while he jostled his hands in the air, preparing to retaliate. But just when he started stringing words together, you decided to start what seemed like a new sentence.

“What are you even writing?!” He wanted to tear all his hair from the roots. “I haven't said anything!”

“Well, you have.”

“It doesn’t matter!” Groaning in protest, he scooted closer to the edge of the couch, almost like he wanted to stand up. “I said nothing that means anything.”

“Then,” you clicked your pen, and his gaze immediately zeroed in on your fingers toying with the shiny metal. He gulped, knowingly so, like waiting for the stationary to stab him in the neck. But nothing had happened, and instead, he missed the way you [had noticed] “There’s nothing you should worry about.”

His shoulders dropped with the heavy weight of being scrutinized. One would have thought he would’ve been used to it by now. But from experience, he had learned that the everlasting bitterness of getting examined under a microscope would always linger. No matter what he tried, the only way of coping with it was to wait for it to pass with his tail between his legs.

“Can you just like stop? Writing?” With his elbows resting on his knees and his face burrowed against the nook of his hands, his voice came out pityingly muffled, much like the hint of the child he had been tasked to cast aside way too soon.

“Why?”

“Because, it’s, fuckin’ weird?” He forced himself to stare straight at the spot right between his Oxfords, shaking his head in disbelief as he attempted a laugh. “I’m not paying you to scribble on your looney book.”

You had hummed once more, and he had wanted to tell you to stop. With his gaze still zeroed on the floor, he failed to notice how the plain Moleskin had been pushed to the side, neatly closed in a genuine display of concern. Or as genuine as a therapist would allow themselves to be during their first session.

“Then what are you paying me for?”

“To like, you know,” he shrugged in disbelief. “Ask me to draw a stick figure under the rain and tell me how to fix this.”

“Fix this?”

“Yeah, this.” The words had left his tongue sitting, heavy in his mouth, and the rest that wanted to tumble out felt foreign in size and shape, though similar in weight to that of shame. The same one that had seeped from between his teeth and gums and skin countless times when the inconceivable consequences of his actions caught up to him growing up. Shame so thick it would put blood to shame, though they sure shared the same taste. And it had always been easier to spit it out in private, drown the aftertaste with fierce scrubbing and hide the searing imprints on his cheeks underneath the covers. But the walls surrounding him were no longer the ones in his childhood bedroom, and you were still waiting on an answer. “Fix, I don’t know…me?”

#roman roy x reader #roman roy x you #roman roy fluff #roman roy #succession fanfiction #succession #roman roy imagine #succession imagine

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gh0st-t0wn3 · 10 months

Text

Some Lmk ss edits + Headcanons (Traffic light trio)

- He/They

- Gay

- Only wears knock off brands (doesn't know they aren't real)

- Autumn is his favorite season, purely because he likes to stomp the crunchy leaves

- Adhd

- Has dimples

- Pigsy once got him rainbow shoes for pride month before he was even out but MK didn't realize they were pride shoes because the rainbow was on the sole

- Tried to cook breakfast for Pigsy and Tang on Father's day once, somehow lit the curtains on fire

- Wants Tattoos but keeps backing down because he doesn't like needles (will probably get one in the future though)

- Has a sketchbook fully dedicated to Redson, would literally die if someone ever found it

- Smells like oranges

- Only a few inches taller than Redson, always teases him for it

- Almost killed Sun Wukong once because he was disguised as a spider

- The Monkey's on flower fruit mountain always climb on him when he's around, he doesn't try to stop them

- Had to remove the snooze option on his alarm clock because he wouldn't stop hitting it

- Chicken scratch handwriting, no one else can read it for the life of them

- Learned Spanish in high school, don't ask why it just feels right

- Covered in scars, but 83% of them are from being a dumb kid instead of battles

- Once described Redson's voice as "really warm, like a hug!" And almost got burnt for it

- Love language is physical touch

- Has those really pretty brown eyes, like the ones that look like honey when the light hits them at that one perfect angle

- Has no fashion sense whatsoever, Mei chose out most of the clothes he owns

- Phone is shattered beyond repair but he refuses to acknowledge that he needs to get a new one

- Obsessively takes personality/buzzfeed tests in the dead of night, once pulled an all nighter just taking "which drink are you?", "what kind of seafood are you?" "What type of candy are you?" Type of buzz feed quizzes, and physically couldn't do deliveries because he was so exhausted the next morning

- Has a bunch of plants but is terrible at taking care of them

- Has a chipped tooth (actually Canon, it's on his lego figurine, I'm still sad they didn't add it to the show :( )

- Once walked in on Tang and Pigsy kissing as a kid and was promptly traumatized

- Has no skin or hair care routine, uses a 3 in 1 Shampoo/conditioner/bodywash

- Has really nice curly/wavy hair but straightens it and uses an unholy amount of hair gel

- Has a wattpad account

- Sleeps in literally the most horrific positions you have ever seen, yet somehow never get cramps or neck/back pains

- Once drank dishwasher soap as a kid because he thought it was juice

- Gets sunburnt incredibly easy (if you've seen the s4 special ykwim)

- Mk once accidently threw a plastic bottle in the trash instead of the recycling bin and got lectured for an hour by Pigsy (Pigsy is a huge environmentalist)

- His bedroom is messy as all hell but he somehow knows where everything is (Pigsy and Tang have tried cleaning it themselves but it was back to being a mess just a few short hours later so they gave up)

- He/Him (FtM)

- Gay

- Shortest one in the trio (just barely though). I like to think that the removal of the samadhi fire stunted his growth and demonic development, which is also why he takes so little after his father in appearance/height. He always wears platforms though, so he looks taller than he is

- He was so quiet and sneaky as a child that his mom had to put a bell on him

- Used to wear large combat boots until someone made a "step on me" joke. He doesn't wear them in public anymore

- Smells like smoke and cinnamon, Mei once described it as a 'campfire' smell

- Has really heavy blackout curtains in his bedroom

- Hair turns black when wet or when he's burnt out

- Always has a soft glow to his body because of his fire, mouth glows faintly, hair glows faintly, the more emotional he is the stronger the glow (MK and Mei are incredibly jealous)

- Tension headaches because we all know that mf has his hair tied up in the tightest goddamn ponytail ever

- Has the samadhi fire back (I'm delusional just let me have this)

- Has a habit of stealing his friends and families clothes to wear, first started when he was really little and would constantly steal whatever clothes of DBK's he could find around the house to help him feel like his dad was still there, and the habit just stuck with him

- Doctor handwriting

- Autistic

- Identifies as male but still likes to wear skirts and dresses sometimes (he just like me fr). Likes floor length skirts the best

- Actually really good at art, mostly draws blueprints for his inventions, but can draw people and landscapes pretty decently too

- Has a childhood Bull plushie that he still sleeps with, hides it under the bed or in the closet whenever MK and Mei come over

- has a scar on his back resembling the rings of samadhi from the removal ritual, Mei once confused it for a tattoo

- Mei once called him "Zesty" and he still doesn't know what it means, she refuses to tell him

- Was homeschooled by PIF

- Has a beauty mark like his mom's

- Has the most angelic, majestic, heartlifting laugh ever, but never actually laughs (unless it's his "evil" laugh, trust me guys)

- Goes to bed at 3am, wakes up at 11am type of person

- Needs glasses because the Samadhi fire fucked up his eyes (in Journey to the West, the samadhi fire is described as a flame that, when activated, "shoots out of every hole in his face" including, of course, his eyes)

- Remember when I said he was a quiet child? Yeah, he can't do that anymore, he literally has no idea how to be quiet now that he's older, the best he can do is whisper shout

- Hopeless romantic, but convinced that any and all feelings are unrequited

- Mei and Mk found his baby pictures once, he will never recover

- Long ass skin and hair care routine, will spend at least two or more hours on it every morning, but it's worth it, his hair and skin are always so soft

- Touch starved as fuck

- Love language is gift giving and positive affirmation (WILL cry if someone compliments him, doesn't matter who it is or what the context is, he once almost burst into tears when Sandy called him a good kid and gave him a pat on the back)

- Once he's focused on something he will stay focused for at least the next ten hours

- Loves strawberry flavored things but hates actual strawberries

- Listens to really underground music and has the biggest superiority complex because of it

- Has the biggest fucking bedroom you have ever seen, with one of those really large and extravagant, super comfortable canopy beds, wakes up like a Disney princess

- Usually self-preserving but will experiment on himself without hesitation if he thinks it'll help him with a breakthrough (has almost died on several occasions)

- She/Her

- Lesbian

- Has tons of piercings: nose, ears, bellybutton, etc (her parents don't know about the bellybutton piercing and she doesn't plan on letting them know anytime soon)

- "Hey, Red boy, cool tattoo!" "... thats a scar." (She still hasn't lived it down)

- Smells like freshly cut grass

- Tallest one in the group, idc what anyone says, I just have a feeling okay?

- Adores glitter makeup but can't stand the feeling of it on her skin

- Love language is quality time

- Has a love/hate relationship with her dragon features, she thinks they look cool and she's proud of her heritage, but if her scales get too dry, which happens very easily, they get really uncomfortable and itchy as all hell

- Had a phase in high school where she'd dye her hair everything except green

- Probably also has Adhd

- Avid tennis player

- Hates the feeling of jeans, but loves denim jackets (has a whole collection, plus one that she and MK have been patching together for years)

- Always smudges her mascara somehow, MK once thought she was crying

- Super rough and rowdy as a kid, like I'm talking pushing kids off swings and down the slide rowdy, tackling people in the sandbox or on the school field, girl was a menace to society

- Snorts when she laughs

- MK tried to scare her once as a joke and her first instinct was to deck him (apologized profusely... before laughing at him)

- Most reckless driver on the planet, it's a wonder how she hasn't gotten her license taken away yet

- Doesn't really consider herself close with her family, she loves them but MK, Tang, Pigsy, and Sandy are her FAMILY, y'know? Like Rosa in b99

- Was the first person to know MK has a crush on Redson, she found out when she walked in on him drawing them together, and she will never let him forget it

- Has a normal skin and hair care routine, and constantly tells Redson that he's insane for needing 2+ hours to complete his

- Is the only one with readable handwriting

- Once stayed up for an entire week to play a new video game that came out

- Will smack her head with a brush if her hair doesn't cooperate

- Bites people (gently, its how she shows affection. Unless she doesn't like you then she'll just naw on your arm until she draws blood)

- Lives on energy drinks, her favorite is Monster Pipeline punch

- Has really soft and really thick hair

- Used to chew on her hair in middle school

- Biggest sweet tooth ever, Redson is disgusted by her eating habits

- Goes on early morning jogs every day except weekends

- Swiftie

- Refuses to watch any movies or shows based on video games she likes because they'll "never have the same charm or energy as the game", but will buy the video games that a show/movie is based on if she watches them before playing

- Will eat random plants all the time. Walking through the park? She'll lean down and pick a flower to chomp on

- The type of girl to carry around a goddamn gallon water bottle everywhere

- Has a thousand fairy lights in her room, it's a fire hazard

#lego monkie kid #fanart #lego monkie kid red son #lego monkey kid fanart #monkie kid red son #red son #lego monkie kid mk #lmk mk #lmk spicynoodles #lmk mei #lego monkie kid mei #traffic light trio #lmk fanart #headcanon #lgbtq

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impulsivefanwriter · 10 months

Text

Ninjago Fic Rec Week — Day 1: Canon &/or Lloyd

Lloyd

https://archiveofourown.org/series/1441819 — The Grass is Always Greener (Series)

A fantastic series by the extremely talented @sunnylighter (go shower their blog in love) featuring a crossover between the show and movie with many amazing instalments (and a great Monkie Kid crossover fic too) that includes elements from S2-S4 and a ton of great head canons, jokes, moments to laugh or cry, and an overall great time

https://archiveofourown.org/series/2178393 — Green Empathy (Series)

Love movieverse Lloyd and think he's a sad little meow meow? Then this series featuring him with empathy powers is perfect for you!

https://archiveofourown.org/works/20742584 — Oh, haven't you heard?

A fantastically hilarious movieverse fic featuring our beloved (secretly) son of a warlord vs. the crack of Buzzfeed Unsolved

https://archiveofourown.org/works/29490180 — Home Is Where You Are

Movieverse Lloyd gets stabbed and his cousin Morro wants to stab people as a result

https://archiveofourown.org/works/30888539 — Who’s the New Guy? He Looks Awfully Green

Even more Movieverse Lloyd being a sad little meow meow, this time with him finally finding friends and hoping to his grandfather they don't find out he's the Lloyd Garmadon

https://archiveofourown.org/works/26722576 — Kind

A bawler in the most wholesome way; a movieverse fic featuring the "words people think about you appear on your skin" AU, staring Lloyd Garmadon, AKA the second most hated person in the city. Seriously, this one shot fic is amazing and is so worth the read

https://www.fanfiction.net/s/13626984/1/The-Idiots-Guide-to-Not-Despising-Your-Cousin — The Idiots’ Guide to Not Despising Your Cousin

Lloyd takes his reformed 'cousin' Morro on a road trip of hell to recreate the scene from Sharknado. Hilarious shenanigans and begrudging cousin bonding ensues, complete with an emotional shouting match, a rocket launcher, and a stolen shark

Lloyd & Canon

https://archiveofourown.org/works/41654502 — Let's Dye This World

Lloyd wants to dye his hair pink. What could go wrong? (Nothing. Nothing at all)

https://archiveofourown.org/works/36502231 — And the Vocab Word of the Day Is...

Someone's taught Zane a word he shouldn't know, and thus we have this hilarious one-shot

https://archiveofourown.org/works/26238865 — An Impromptu Little Brother

You want RG siblings fluff? You've got it! This adorable fic showcases the sweet bonding of S1 Kai and Lloyd

https://archiveofourown.org/works/44929669/chapters/113050273 — On the Outside

You want even more "Lloyd gets adopted by his siblings and finds a family" fluff? Well, this one also includes some angst, but in a hurt/comfort way, and includes bonding with the entire team

https://archiveofourown.org/works/13837338/chapters/31823022 — All I Want for Christmas is You

Lloyd has never celebrated Christmas before, and is desperately trying to hide it

https://www.fanfiction.net/s/13548435/1/Warning-Fire-Hazard — Warning: Fire Hazard

As the favourite great-grandson of Firstborne, she decides to teach him a fun dragon trick... fire-breathing. Obviously Lloyd uses this new trick responsibly

Canon

https://archiveofourown.org/works/25916767 — Cool Down

A fantastic fic about Zane's element as a counterbalance to Kai's in stressful situations, and how a hug can go a long way

https://archiveofourown.org/works/43938129 — Cold Hands, Warm Heart

Zane's never been in a snowball fight before, and Kai & the others decide this will not stand. Fluff ensues in this beautifully written adorable found family fic

https://archiveofourown.org/works/28433430/chapters/69674970 — Nature vs. Nurture

S2 Megaweapon shenanigans with the OG4 getting turned into kids again after Child's Play... but this time, without their memories

https://archiveofourown.org/works/32716111/chapters/81165256 — Habits of Home(lessness)

A "5 times + 1" fic about Jay being incredibly concerned and confused by the mysterious habits of his team

https://archiveofourown.org/works/27700081/chapters/67792351 — Your Mistakes Are Yours to Keep (BEING REWRITTEN)

Post Skybound angst my beloved <3

https://archiveofourown.org/works/28467426 — For When You Need Love

So many platonic kisses; an amazing collection of small 1-on-1 bonding moments between every member of this team of found family ninja. This is one of my comfort fics

https://archiveofourown.org/works/15544857/chapters/36085881 — powersurge

What would an outburst of elemental power look like? A fantastic collection of short stories featuring each of the ninja in a stressful situation and a boatload of interesting headcanons, that's what

https://archiveofourown.org/works/35446993/chapters/88356208 — *Wu voice* "Ah, gotta get my kids."

A great fic (and amazing prequel/summary animatic by the very talented @a-big-chicken-nerd) featuring Sensei Wu helping his students after each lose control of their elemental powers on what should have been normal patrols across Ninjago

https://archiveofourown.org/works/39091860/chapters/97792278 — Walk a Mile

A fun bodyswap fic featuring Kai & Jay learning to tolerate each other

https://archiveofourown.org/works/47781802/chapters/120452491 — Real Life (Dragons Rising S1 spoilers)

Can't really say what it's about for spoilers but it's a new character bonding with an old one and it's sweet <3

https://archiveofourown.org/works/12407508/chapters/28232733 — Chips and Salsa

Good ol' Glacier shipping at its finest in this wonderful fic; a secretly pining Cole brings his crush Zane to his house while trying to get over said crush. Lou knows his son's attempts won't be sucessful. Shenanigans, dancing, pining, and apology pancakes follow

https://archiveofourown.org/works/28905537/chapters/70915611 — Between the Scenes

A collection of great stories between episodes and pre-pilots to 'fill the gaps' the show doesn't cover

https://www.fanfiction.net/s/13520844/1/There-s-Insurance-For-That — There's Insurance For That

A hilarious fic about Skylor learning all the places the ninja are banned from and the reasons for said bans

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quitealotofsodapop · 4 months

Note

Actually, i think it's closer to a year or more for how long Bai He was possessed. Which is honestly terrifying because why the hell did nobody notice or set up any missing child posters!?

Also, LBD probably didn't know Wukong was, well, a Spiritual Stone Monkey. So she ended up with the most interesting bit of fortune by picking a child to possess, not only because Bai He was the easy target, but because she had inadvertently managed to give herself and inate advantage against Sun Wukong by using the body of a child. As she had said Wukong,

"You're plan is to... fist fight a child!?"

No... not that's not what Wukong's plan was. But it was the only plan he had left. And with LBD piloting a child's body and openly admitting she's a child, she gave herself the advantage with that line alone. Because Wukong may have been going strong it with everything he had, not holding back, but when it came down to it, he hesitated. And it's entirely because his instincts were screaming at him not to do it.

I have no doubt Wukong was pretty messed up mentally and emotionally after being freed from the LBD, notvjyst from the actions he performed while possessed (Grievously wounding his mate, attacking his little big brother Nez Ha and nephew Red Son, kidnapping Mei snd imprisoning her in ice, almost killing MK), but also for his actions right before being possessed. I think, before Macaque has dragged Bai He into the nest, Wukong may have actively avoiding the child he had tried to kill. But then his silly mate bad to go and force the two into the same spot.

Oh Bai He has been under LBD's control since before New Years, and I feel like S2 & 3 is extended over a few weeks to account for Wukong's "vacation".

One subtle detail I noticed at the end of S1 is that the Little Girl's hair is shorter before she's possessed, suggesting that LBD has been possessing her long enough for it to grow out.

And since Wukong describes "still feeling her [LBD] under my skin", I imagine being possesed felt like Bai He's very skeleton was being puppeted by an icy hand.

For months.

And there was no sign of missing persons posters anywhere around town post-S1 finale. Even though Metropolis is a big city on par with Shanghai or similar, and demon/monster attacks have become commonplace; there would still have been something mentioned about a child going missing in the area. Unless no one was looking out for her...

Bai He would Not Be Fine in the aftermath of S3. She was possessed by a demon for nearly a year - that has to leave lasting effects on the body and soul. I'm shocked that she didn't return in S4 as a full character, even just to provide an outsiders view of all the nonsense going on. She isn't anyone's reincarnation or anyone important, but she will help her new friends by anymeans nessesary!

Wukong def feels awkward being around the little girl seeing how his nemesis was wearing her face for the last while. Bai He on the otherhand is screaming internally cus "Doesn't this guy kill demons for a living!? I'm a demon now!"

She oddly bonds quicker with Macaque, as they both see each other as victims/tools of LBD at the end of the day. Macaque thinks it's oddly cute annoying to have the pipsqueak at his heels, but he at least owes her someone who can related to the pain she's feeling.

#slow boiled stone egg au #lmk bai he #lmk hcs #lmk headcanons #lmk lbd's host #lmk lbd #lmk lady bone demon #sun wukong #lmk aus #lmk #lego monkie kid

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kurtie4life96 · 2 years

Text

Halloween Night ● S.H. × Fem Reader × R.B.

Summary: What happens when the reader realizes she's in love with her best friends, but doesn't want to hurt them?

CW: MDNI 18+, friends to lovers, angst, fluff, bisexual!fem reader, poly relations, smut, bi panic, it's the 80s, cunnilingus (giving and receiving), pnv sex, unprotected sex, a bit of religious trauma, takes place during/after S4, no use of y/n but reader has a nickname, reader has a birthday, slowburn, steve harrington is too hot for life, robin buckley is too hot for life, ROBIN AND STEVE DO NOT INTERACT PHYSICALLY/SEXUALLY, RELATIONS WITH THEM TAKE PLACE AT SEPARATE TIMES

AN: lightly edited, sorry this took me so long

♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡

It was January 2nd of 1986.

You had just moved to a small town named Hawkins, and were looking for a fresh start, after your parents had kicked you out.

You were exiled from the family, after mom and dad came home earlier than you expected, and walked in to see you sitting on the couch with another girl.

Normally, this would not have bothered them. Except this time, they came in to see you kissing a girl on the lips.

You had told them that you two were just practicing for when you'll kiss a boy, but they saw right through your facade. Them being very religious, they felt they had no choice but to send you packing. They had given you enough money to pay for one month of housing, but that was it. They told you that they loved you, but you needed to leave and never contact them again. So you got in your beat up car, and drove until you were able to find a cheap apartment in a small town.

Now you needed to find a job in order to keep that housing.

You found that job at Family Video. And you also found your co workers Robin and Steve.

They welcomed you with open arms. The three of you became good friends within a span of a few months. Steve was funny, charming and made work much more bearable. Robin was unique, quick-witted and a great conversationalist. Despite her claims of never being able to shut up, you loved that about her, because you related to that. This friendship with them both turned into movie nights at your place frequently, the three of you poking fun at each other, throwing popcorn, laughing and sometimes drinking or smoking the night away, and sometimes these nights would turn into sleepovers. You had found a new family.

There was just one thing you couldn't tell them, one thing you kept to yourself, because you couldn't bear the possibility of being criticized and thrown away again.

The fact that you loved girls... romantically.

I mean, how could you not? With their beautiful, supple lips, smooth skin, long eyelashes, all the curves of their bodies, how they smell so sweet like candy and flowers, and how gentle and soft their touch is. You had never been in bed with one of these angelic, goddess like women before. But you were sure of yourself, you had been ever since you were a child, even with your upbringing.

But there was something else about you too.

You also loved boys just as much. Their kisses feeling more rough, but nevertheless passionate, how romantic and charming they can be, feeling so safe and secure with them. Their big, strong arms, the curves of their muscles, and their goofy smiles. What's not to love?

As open minded and welcoming as Robin and Steve seemed to be, you couldn't risk telling them, only for your life to fall apart all over again. You hated the thought of Robin being disgusted by you, no longer wanting to be in your presence, and you didn't like the thought of Steve thinking the same, and with his infamous experience with women in Hawkins, possibly fetishizing you.

And so you kept your secret with you, even after everything you'd all gone through. From the moment that Dustin and Max slid over the counter in a panic, learning from word of mouth and then firsthand experience what the Upside Down is, swimming into Lovers Lake to save Steve's ass, you and Eddie nearly succumbing to your injuries after you attempted to take down a swarm of Demobats, defeating Vecna, the town being destroyed by the "earthquake"... through all of it, you still didn't tell anyone about your sexuality.

The experience was traumatizing to say the least, but it did bring you all closer than you could have ever imagined or hoped for. Especially closer with Steve and Robin.

Which was not particularly a good thing in your mind.

Because you had developed romantic feelings for them both.

It happened when Robin jumped into the water after Steve was yanked down into Lover's Lake. You'd never seen such a beautiful act of bravery. It happened when Steve bit the bat that was choking him, spitting out it's blood. You'd never seen anything so fearless in your life. It happened when Robin held you tight when the Upside Down began to shake. You'd never had someone hold you in a way that made you feel so safe. It happened when Steve ripped off a fabric of his clothing to stop the heavy bleeding from your wounds after you'd fought the bats with Eddie. It happened when Robin would cook you meals and bring them to your apartment while you recovered in bed. It happened when the both of them spent the majority of their free time at the comfort of your home, trying to cheer you up and make sure your injuries were healing properly.

These feelings amplified even more when they both gave you the affectionate nickname "Bee", after you had been stung by one on your thigh over the summer and overly freaked out about it. You told them it had to have been a wasp, because it hurt so much! But they just laughed and continued to call you Bee, saying it was your fault for always wearing ripped jeans everyday, jokingly, of course.

And then you realized that the feelings you had for them didn't just spontaneously come up in the Upside Down.

Your adoration for them started when you began working at Family Video. But you had pushed those feelings aside, knowing that there was no way you could ever reveal yourself and risk destroying their wonderful friendship.

It's just that you couldn't help it. Steve is so devilishly handsome, helpful, selfless and endearing. And god, not to mention his gorgeous hair.

And Robin... she's so dorky, you could die of cuteness. The way she looked so beautiful no matter if she wore her hair up or down. So effortlessly funny and empathic. And those lips and smile... Damn it.

You felt so ashamed of yourself. Not for being... different. But because you had fallen for two people at the same time, and it just wasn't fair to them. So you never told them how you felt, not only because you didn't want to be outcasted, but because they're best friends.

Little did you know, ever since Steve and Robin first saw you walk into Family Video, they both immediately held a soft spot for you in their heart. They would playfully argue with each other about who you were into. Of course, neither of them thought they had a chance, but the way you hugged Steve, a little longer than a platonic friend would, and the way you would ruffle and play with his hair, made him wonder. And the way you dressed, not so feminine, but not exactly in a masculine way either, more like a tomboy with a pretty face and gorgeous hair, and the way you would hold a gaze with Robin, a little longer than a normal person would, made her wonder, too.

Nevertheless, you were a bit hard to read, the both of them would joke about it when you weren't around, but never taking it too seriously, and never making a move, just happy, and grateful, to be friends with you.

Especially on Robin's part, because she never told you her secret either. The only one who knew, was Steve.

This would soon all change.

♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡

7 months after the events that took place, Hawkins working tirelessly to rebuild their community, you were driving home from work after a shift at Family Video that you had worked alone. You shivered, your nose and cheeks red and freezing, as you attempted to turn the heater on in your car, to no avail.

I don't know why I try, shit hasn't worked since I moved here.

Now that it was the middle of October, the chill in the air had begun to set in. You didn't mind too much though, you in fact liked the cold much better than the sweltering heat in the summer of Indiana.

Today was also your birthday, something you normally dreaded. All of your previous birthdays were hell, no pun intended. You were only ever given a new Bible every year as a present from your parents, and you weren't allowed to have sleepovers, even on your special day, and you were also never allowed to blow out a candle after being sung Happy Birthday, your mom claiming it was witchcraft to do so.

Absolute hypocrisy.

But tonight was going to be much better. You were planning on ordering a couple pizzas, relaxing and watching Labyrinth with Robin and Steve. You had already seen the movie, given where you work, but it's your favorite one by far. David Bowie and Jennifer Connelly are absolute works of art.

You parked your car and got out, still shivering, when you looked up and noticed in the window of your apartment, the lights were on. This was peculiar, as you never kept them on when you left. And just as quickly as you noticed the light was on, the light turned off. You immediately became worried, frightened even, and opened the trunk of your car to grab your crowbar.

You weren't going to go down without a fight. You'd been through too much already.

You crept your way up the stairs, leading to your door on the second floor of the building. You crept below the front window, not wanting whoever- or whatever- was in your house to see you. Your front door was opened slightly ajar. You took a deep breath, held up your weapon ready for attack, and kicked the door open. You saw some shadowy figures and just as you began to lunge for them, your light was flipped back on.

"SURPRISE!" They all shouted in unison.

You dropped the crowbar in shock.

Everyone was there. Everyone. Steve, Robin, Eddie, Nancy, Jonathan, Dustin, Max, Lucas, Will, El, Mike, everyone. The room was decorated by balloons and streamers in all your favorite colors, pizza and beers already in tow, and a big chocolate cake lay on the kitchen counter that said "Happy Birthday, Bee!"

As soon as they yelled, everyone slightly flinched at your near attack on them, Dustin being the exception, who screamed dramatically and fell backwards.

Everyone laughed and Eddie went to pick up the poor kid.

Robin ran up to you excitedly, grabbed your fists, and said, "It's a surprise party! For your birthday!" You chuckled a bit. "Yeah, I noticed that."

Steve came up to you and wrapped you in a big hug. "Happy birthday, Bee. I almost thought you were gonna smash my face in for a second!" You smiled against his chest. He smelled like cedarwood and eucalyptus. "Yeah, I thought I was going to, too! Thank you." You let go of each other and smiled at him. You looked over to Robin, grinned, and gave her a big hug too. She was all dressed up, in her own Robin way. She looked so damn beautiful.

As everyone behind them chatted amongst themselves, you raised your voice, "So, who's idea was it to throw me a surprise party, anyways?" Dustin caught your eye, raised his eyebrows and pointed directly at the pair next to you. "We did!" Robin announced. Steve chimed in, "Yeah, we've been planning it for a couple weeks now, that's why you worked by yourself today. We've been here, setting up everything."

Robin rolled her eyes and punched his shoulder playfully. "I blew up the balloons. He practically did nothing." Steve gave her a dirty look. "Hey, that's not true, I bought the cake! Anyways, we wanted to do this for you, because we know that your birthdays have always sucked, and we just wanted to make sure you had a good one this time, so-"

Steve stopped when he noticed tears threatening to spill down your face. Robin looked at you concerned, and held your hands in hers again. "I'm so sorry, Bee, we didn't mean to scare you, maybe we shouldn't have done this, I mean there are people that don't like surprise parties, we can all leave right now, I'm really sorry-"

"Sh." You smiled and looked into her eyes with the most amount of gratefulness, and gave the same glance to Steve. "This is better than anything I could have ever hoped for. Thank you both. So much. So so much." You pulled them in for a tight hug.

"Hey, birthday girl is crying!" Eddie announced. Everyone began to gather to where the three of you were, and started a massive giant group hug. You laughed and enjoyed the warm embrace.

An hour or so had passed, everyone eating pizza, laughing, listening to music and drinking beer, Steve smacking Dustin's hand when he attempted to grab one. Nancy and Jonathan, El and Mike, Lucas and Max all cuddled up on the couch.

"Cake time!" Robin announced. You felt a little nervous pit in your stomach, but you approached the kitchen counter.

Eddie lit the big, sparkly candle with his lighter. "One, two, three..." everyone began to sing Happy Birthday to you in unison. You didn't know what to do with yourself, shuffling your feet, smiling cheesy at everybody. You must have zoned out by the end of it, because a gentle but heavy hand placed itself on your shoulder. "It's time to make a wish." Steve whispered to you, just inches from your face. You didn't know if it was him or the candle that made your face feel hot. You looked over at Robin standing beside you, and she gave you a reassuring smile and squeezed your hand. You faced the candle, closed your eyes tightly, made a wish, and blew the candle out. Everyone cheered for you. It had to be the best feeling in the world.

Everyone lingered around for another couple hours, before it got a little quiet, the party starting to die down. Seeing as Steve, Robin and yourself had a few beers, Nancy, Jonathan and Eddie rounded up the younger bunch of the group to take them home. You thanked them. Nancy came up and gave you a hug before she walked out. "Happy Birthday." She said with a smile, and left.

Once everyone else was gone, you turned around to face Steve and Robin, sitting next to each other on the couch. "Looks like I'm stuck with you two, again." You rolled your eyes playfully. They both smiled and motioned for you to come sit on the couch between them. You obliged and once you sat down, Steve grabbed your waist and tickled you a bit, making you squeal. Robin gave him a look that said, 'wow, really?', but you hadn't noticed.

She began to talk. "So, we know that you said no presents, but..." you raised your eyebrow at her and she shushed you. "BUT... we both decided to chip in and just get you a small little something." You smiled and glanced over at Steve, him smiling back and giving you a little nod, his arm over your shoulder. Robin pulled a small little box out of her pocket and handed it to you. "You guys shouldn't have..." Steve gave you an excited look, "Come on, open it!"

Robin placed her hand on your leg as you took off the top of the box. You gasped.

It was a necklace. But not any regular necklace. It was a silver necklace, with a pendant of a bumblebee.

"Do you get it?" Robin asked enthusiastically. "Because that's your nickname! It's a bee!"

"Oh my god, you guys.. this is amazing." You gave each of them a tight, long, swaying hug. Robin took the necklace out of the box, and Steve smoothed your hair and pulled it up a bit, so she could put the necklace around you and clasp it.

A wash of sadness, and a bit of guilt came over you. You thumbed at the necklace, eyes watering again.

Steve interrupted your thoughts, "What's wrong, Bee?"

They must have noticed the look on your face. You shook your head and smiled again. "Nothing, it's just the nicest thing anyone's ever done for me. Thank you guys. So, so much. For everything.

Steve grinned ear to ear. "Alright, now... how's about that movie?" He looked at Robin and she nodded.

The three of you spent the rest of the evening watching Labyrinth, drinking more beers, laughing at the ridiculous characters, shoving each other playfully when Bowie sang "Magic Dance", aiming popcorn into each other's mouths, curled up on the couch with fuzzy blankets. As the end of the movie neared, the realization came into your mind again.

You were in love with both of them. And there was nothing you could do about it except keep pretending you don't, forever.

When the credits rolled, you stood up from the couch and fake yawned, declaring, "I'm whooped. I think I'm gonna go hit the hay now."

They both agreed that it was time for bed. As Steve laid down on your couch with a blanket and pillow, Robin began to follow you into your bedroom. You gave her an alarming look.

"What's wrong Bee?" Her sweet raspy voice, god how it melted you. You remembered that when you have sleepovers, the two of you usually share a bed, sometimes Steve, on occasion.

"Oh nothing, it's just that, if you sleep with me in my bed tonight, it'll be kinda hot-" you stopped yourself midsentence. "I mean, since we've been drinking and such, I think we'll get all hot and sweaty, ya know, body heat..." She scrunched her face into a confused look, but accepted your answer. "Okay..." she dragged the word out. "Where should I sleep then?"

"You can sleep in the guest bedroom tonight. It's got nice, clean new sheets. It'll be comfy, I promise."

"Okay, well, goodnight Bee."

"Goodnight."

And with that, she headed off to the guest bedroom, her bag of clothes for the next day in hand.

You looked over at Steve. He looked a little confused as well.

"Goodnight Steve."

"Sleep tight, Bee."

And with that, you headed into your room and gently shut the door. You laid on your bed, holding onto a pillow as you stared at the wall. You thumbed the little bee necklace a bit, before you put your pillow over your face and quietly cried into it. You had the most wonderful day, maybe in your whole life, but you couldn't help but let the tears stream down your cheeks, thinking about what you had to hide from the both of them. Not only your romantic feelings towards the both of them that you felt equally, but your own sexuality. Once you felt you had no more tears to cry, you sighed deeply, and fell asleep.

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2 weeks had gone by since your birthday, and it was now the day before Halloween. You could feel the spooky excitement in the air, especially with all the customers coming in to Family Video to rent some horror and slasher films, shaking your head with a grin when children would rent Friday the 13th, knowing they would soon regret it. You and your two best friends had spent the last week working on your costumes together, extremely excited to celebrate the holiday as you had never been able to before because of your upbringing. Unfortunately, Eddie declined to join in on the fun, as he said Halloween was a "big selling" night for him.

With Robin having the day off, Steve and yourself were in the last hour of your shift. He was at the front of the store, putting up some silly pumpkin and ghost stickers in the windows, along with a "Closed 4 Halloween!!" sign with some not so impressive handwriting. Thankfully, Keith loved Halloween and was happy to close the store for the holiday.

You were behind the desk, organizing some tapes. You couldn't help but to look at Steve get frustrated with the stickers, cursing and murmuring to himself as he ran his fingers through his hair. You silently giggled to yourself at his dilemma, he was adorable when agitated, and damn, did he look good with his back towards you as much as the front. You couldn't help but to feel a flutter in your stomach, and heat rising to your cheeks...

Stop it.

As Steve finished up with his decorations and you finished up with organizing some tapes, you walked to the side of the store to restock some new arrivals, preparing for when Family Video was open again on the 1st.

As you tried your best to reach on your tippy toes to stock a new tape, you were about to jump to try to get it on the top shelf, when you heard a gentle voice behind you.

"Hey, let me get that for you."

Steve grabbed the tape from you as you turned around to face him. He placed it in its correct spot on the shelf effortlessly. When he was reaching over you, you couldn't help but to stare at the length of his bare neck, him being only inches in front of you. Your heart skipped a beat, and you forgot to breathe for a moment.

Steve must have noticed you staring at him for a bit too long, your cheeks beginning to get a rosy flush to them. "Hey, Bee... is uh... is everything okay?"

You shook out of your trance like state, feeling embarrassed, but quickly came up with a rebuttal, "Oh yeah, I'm fine, it's just that I definitely could have done that by myself, eventually." You gave him a high and mighty, but playful look.

He chuckled a bit, "Yeah, maybe if you grabbed a ladder."

You rolled your eyes and gave a cheeky smile, "Whatever Steve, I totally could have done it, even without a ladder." You gave him a teasing, but light shove to his shoulder. Your giggling stopped when you looked at him in his eyes again.

He was staring at your face, full on staring, with a slight purse to his lips. You attempted to put a more serious look on your face, but it ended up looking more dreamy as you gazed in his eyes, memorizing all the details of his face.

This went on for what seemed like an eternity, but was more like ten seconds, before you broke out of the trance and cleared your throat, "So, um... anyways, um... tomorrow is gonna be really fun!" You smiled sheepishly.

Steve took an awkward step back from you, chuckling nervously while running his hand through his stupid, glorious hair, breaking eye contact and looking at the floor, "Yeah, yeah! No, um- yeah, it's gonna be great! I can't wait until we all see each other in our costumes."

You, too, looked at the floor and, with a timid babble, continued to fill the awkward tension between you two. "Yeah, we've been really working hard on them, and it'll be fun to see the kids you just love to babysit, going around trick or treating."

Steve smiled, thinking of his beloved 'children'. "Yeah, I assume at least half of them will be going as Ghostbusters again."

"Yep... it's definitely their favorite movie, and knowing Eddie, he'll probably dress up as some D&D character... or something nerdy like that while he's out selling." You exhaled deeply, loudly at the end of your sentence, as if you'd forgotten how to breathe again.

He gave you an awkward, and possibly even disappointed half smile. He couldn't think of anything to say back, and neither could you, as you continued to stare at the floor and shuffle your feet for a moment. The tension in the air was so thick, you could cut it with a knife, a stomach full of nervousness and desire that you desperately wanted to go away, but at the same time, you liked a little too much.

Steve broke the heavy silence. "So um, it's 8:00 now, time to close up." He looked at the door. You gave a quiet "Okay." with a small crack in your voice.

You headed down to the breakroom to gather your belongings and head home, trying to think of anything other than your feelings for both Steve and Robin, while he turned off the lights and flipped the 'Open' sign over to 'Closed', and locked the door.

You grabbed your bag, filled with little things any girl would have- chapstick, hand lotion, a small roller of perfume, your keys. You fumbled around in it to pull the latter out, and as you turned around, he was standing right in front of you.

Steve was standing right in front of you. Merely inches away. You looked up at him, surprised, your face getting hot by the second from his sudden closeness.

"So... you really do like that necklace we got you?"

You grabbed the pendant with your thumb and index finger and rubbed it.

"Yeah, no, I really do. I've worn it everyday since." You smiled at him gratefully, but still feeling confused as to what was going on.

"Yeah, yeah, I can tell.. I'm glad you really like it. It looks really... good on you." He stuttered between his words, taking in short inhales. His cheeks were turning a dark pink. Yours were too, you could feel it, yet still tried your best to ignore it.

"Well... thank you." You gave him a small smile of appreciation, and couldn't help but to lean back against the table a bit, an involuntary reaction of the close distance between you two.

Steve looked around the room anxiously, and said in a voice a little louder than before, "Hey, so, um... I have to tell you something." He ran his hand through his hair again, in some kind of attempt to soothe himself.

You pursed your lips and gulped, him waiting for a response so he could continue. "Okay."

He sighed, staring away at a wall for half the statement, before eventually turning his eyes over to look in yours. "So, I've been feeling... having some feelings for you. For a while now. And I haven't been able to tell if you've been feeling the same way about me, you're a little unreadable sometimes- which is fine! It's totally okay. It's just that I told..." He paused. "A friend of ours how I felt. And she- er, they, told me to stop being a wuss, and tell you how I feel." He continued to ramble and stumble on his words. "And I want you to know, that if you don't feel the same, that it's totally okay! Totally fine, we could always stay friends no matter what, that's something I'd never wanna ruin, because, we've just been through a lot together, you know? Like, all of us." He paused for a moment to look at your reaction, get a response, whether it was acceptance, rejection, (which he felt like would be a dagger in the heart, but he would do his best to hide it) anything. He just needed some type of reponse to what he confessed to you.

And the way that he had confessed to you, it felt like he had been saving it up for, who knows how long, and sounded very rehearsed, despite the skittish way he spoke to you.

You looked down on the floor, and smiled a bit, through you were trying hard not to, contemplating what you could manage out with words.

"So, this... friend. Was this friend Robin? The one who told you to tell me all this?" You focused on his face again. His way too pretty face.

He let out a shaky, breathy laugh. "Yeah, yeah, it was. Been telling me for a while now." He stopped for a moment before continuing.

"So, uh, everything I just told you, how do you feel about it?" He stretched the last few words.

You didn't know what to say. You went inside your own mind for a moment, thinking about Robin, how she told Steve to confess the way he felt about you. It hurt your heart for a moment, but at the same time, there he was, right in front of you, reciprocating feelings you were to oblivious to know he had.

You continued to lean back into the table, but gazed at him through half-lidded, dreamy eyes, face now cherry red in adoration. And he was noticing the way you were looking at him, too.

He took a small step forward, gazing into your face the same way. When you gave no body language of hesitation, he took another step forward, until he was leaning down, looking into your hazed eyes. You couldn't help but to break contact, but only to slowly look at his lips. They looked hungry. And they looked like they would fit perfectly against yours. You looked back into his eyes, only to catch him focusing on your lips too. He looked up into your eyes again, pupils dilated. And he decided that the way you were looking at him, was enough permission.

Steve made the first move.

He leaned in, gently pressing his mouth onto yours, one hand on the table you were leaning on, and another cradling the side of your face. You returned the kiss as quickly as he gave it, turning it into a long, strung out embrace, before he pulled back to get a look at your face.

"You're so pretty, Bee. You know that?" He whispered into your mouth.

"Steve..."

He kissed you again, again, and again, before both of your hands were holding his face, one of his still on yours, and the other one smoothing down your back. He slid his tongue along your bottom lip, asking for entrance, to which you obliged. He licked into your mouth, your tongue now dancing with his, in perfect, so perfect sync.

The kisses were beginning to get faster, sloppier, more desperate after each and every one. You couldn't help but squeeze your thighs together after he put a leg between them. He began to suck on your bottom lip, gaining a whimper from you. The both of you were feeling hotter and hotter by the second, an ache deep down low, when you abruptly broke the kiss, taking in a deep, loud inhale.

"Steve," you panted, "I have to tell you something."

He was breathing heavily too. "Yeah? What is it? You okay?"

"Well, yes... and no."

He gave you a confused look, and pulled back from you to let you speak.

"Steve, I really have to tell you something. Something big. And I just... I really hope you don't hate me for it." Your voice cracked, filled with guilt.

"Well... what is it?" He looked a little worried, thinking perhaps you had a boyfriend you never told him about.

"So, there's something about me that's different. That absolutely no one knows."

He nodded eagerly, "Well, go on, tell me! We've been through actual hell and back, you can tell me anything." He smiled.

"Okay, um..." you fumbled with your necklace again. "So obviously, I really like boys..."

He nodded again, facial expression motioning for you to continue.

"I really like girls too Steve." You immediately looked away from him, tears at the corners of your eyes, absolutely terrified of his reaction.

"Really?"

You nodded and continued to look away from him.

"That's it?"

You snapped your face forward to look at him in shock, wide-eyed.

He chuckled a bit. "That's okay! That's fine! That's great! I have a friend, um, well I know a girl that's into girls too. But honey, honey," he leaned forward and grabbed your face, looked into your still bewildered eyes. "What does that have to do with us?" He paused for a second and smiled, before leaning in to kiss you eagerly again. And as much as your body wanted to, needed to so badly, there was still guilt in your heart, so you immediately pulled back and looked away.

"Steve, we have to stop." You said quietly.

A wave of sadness washed over him. "Why? Do you.. do you not like me this way?"

You perked up and gave a sad, empathetic smile. "No, no- I mean yes, I do! I really, really do, and I have for such a long time Steve. It's just that... there's someone else too."

His heart dropped.

"So, are you dating someone else?"

"No, I'm not dating anyone else. I'm not in a relationship or anything. It's just that... I have feelings for someone else too. And I love- like you as much as I like them. The same. So I can't just string you along like that." You began to quietly sob with that last sentence.

Steve just stared at you. Still completely confused as to what was going on. What was going on?

"I have to go, um, but I really think we should all still hang out tomorrow, have fun, you know, and we can talk about this later." You pulled your keys out of your bag and headed for the parking lot.

Steve stood still for a second, thinking, taking everything in, before running out after you.

"Bee! Hey, Bee! Please, wait up! Hold on a second-"

You had already gotten into your car, turning onto the street to get home, crying, absolutely wailing into the chilly night, in absolute disbelief of yourself for possibly ruining not only your life, but a pure friendship that was established long before you came into the picture.

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The next day, with swollen eyes from crying yourself to sleep the night before, you were looking into your full length mirror, inspecting your makeup. It wasn't much, but makeup was not necessary for the costume you were wearing for Halloween. You looked down at your long, strapless white dress, that you had squeezed red ink all over to make it look bloody. You hadn't poured any onto your face or hair, not wanting to wash it all out after what's supposed to be a long night. You gave the dress a little smile, proud of the outcome of your makeshift costume of Carrie, your all time favorite horror movie.

You heard a knock at your door, confused as to who it could be. You looked at the time, it was 7 p.m.

You opened the door cautiously, only for Robin to barge in, pulling you into a big, tight hug. "Oh my god, you look amazing!" she said excitedly in her beautiful, raspy voice, looking at you up and down.

You squeezed her right back and laughed. She smelled like vanilla and strawberries. It was a little too intoxicating.

You let go of each other's grasps. "Robin, are you kidding? You look amazing, like, so hot!" She smiled big and blushed at the comment. You marked it off as friendly flattery.

She was going as her favorite horror movie character, too. Freddy Krueger. Complete with the long-sleeved, red striped sweater, that hugged her body so perfectly, with some tight, black ripped jeans and black leather, buckled boots. You guessed she decided not to go with the Freddy claw, after all.

"I was supposed to come pick you up! Did you walk all the way here?"

She nodded enthusiastically.

"Why?"

"I just wanted to surprise you! I'm just so excited for tonight! It's gonna be so much fun!" She jumped, her fists squeezed tight, in the most adorable fashion you'd ever seen.

"Well, now that I'm already here," she continued, "Let's just go now, and get a headstart and meet up with Steve! I'm sure he's already babysitting anyways." She chuckled.

You let out a nervous laugh and fidgeted with your bee pendant again. "Yeah... Steve," you huffed, "yeah, we should do that."

Robin might be quirky, out of the box, but she's not stupid. She raised her eyebrows at you, "What's wrong? Did something happen?"

You were silent for a moment before you collected yourself and said "Oh, no, nothing bad! Just that... he was really annoying at work yesterday. Mixed up some tapes with the, uh, wrong boxes."

She gave you an empathetic nod and smile, "I get it. That's Steve for ya. Are you ready to go? Because I am!"

You gave her a cheesy smile, taking in her delightfully sunny demeanor, "Absolutely. Let me get my shoes on."

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The two of you pulled up beside Steve's house, blaring and singing along to "Girls Just Wanna Have Fun" with the windows rolled down.

You turned your car off the moment Steve walked up to your driver's side window and ducked into it. "Nice music taste, ladies."

Steve was in costume, wearing the classic blue jumpsuit, black jacket, black boots and a Jason Voorhees mask, except the mask was resting on top of his fluffy head. And for some reason he looked... hot. You nearly drooled.

Robin noticed your lack of response and rebuttled, "Steve, don't even act like you don't know all the lyrics to this song."

He threw his hands up in defense. "Hey, it was against my will!"

You laughed softly, absent mindedly, deep in thought, before he broke you out of it. "Hey, Bee. The dress came together well. You look really nice."

You were surprised at his compliment, given the events of the night before. "Oh, um, thank you." You half smiled at him, a sad look in your eyes.

Robin crossed her arms and pouted.

Steve went into defensive mode again. "Hey, you look nice too, okay? Very scary." He said the last words sarcastically. She rolled her eyes. "Whatever. You look so super scary, too. Let's go." Steve backed away as the both of you got out of your car.

The three of you were taking the 'kiddos' trick or treating in Steve's neighborhood, as Dustin claimed, "That's where all the full size candy bars are!" The three of you followed the kids around for about 2 hours, pillow cases out, laughing all around, collecting massive amounts of candy. You couldn't help but smile to yourself, glad they were soaking up the last years of their childhood before the adults deemed them "too old" to be trick-or-treating.

As you were walking back to Steve's house, you cursed yourself for not bringing a jacket. The weather was supposed to be somewhat nice tonight, but the chilly breeze began to bite at your arms, as you were in a sleeveless gown. You rubbed your arms over each other in an attempt to warm yourself. Steve noticed.

"Here, take this." He began to take his jacket off to hand to you.

"No, Steve, it's okay, honestly-"

"Bee, I insist. You're freezing, and I know the heat doesn't work in your car. Take it." He offered the jacket to you, smiling. Like a real, genuine smile. As if last night never happened.

"Well... thank you. That's nice of you-" You put his jacket on. It smelled just like him.

Damn it.

"Don't say that's nice of me. We're friends, and that's what friends are for." He ruffled your hair playfully and you giggled nervously.

Why is he acting like everything's okay?

You looked over to Robin walking beside you. She seemed to be lost in thought, staring at the sidewalk, making sure not to step on any cracks. She felt eyes on her and looked up at you, changing her expression from a dissociated one to a happy smile, but there was something else in her eyes. Angst? You couldn't tell.

As you arrived back at your car, you offered Steve's jacket back to him, but he refused insistently. You hesitantly accepted his response.

"So, after I take these kids back home, we still having a beer or two at your place, Bee?"

You got into your car, as did Robin, and affirmed to him, "Yeah, of course, I just have to do something first, but I'll give you a call."

He smirked affectionately and gave your car a couple taps, before walking up the driveway to load the kids up in his car, and driving off to take them home.

"So..." Robin began. "That was fun."

You beamed at her. "It was super fun. I never got to dress up before and it was really cool watching kids trick-or-treating for the first time!"

"Speaking of," she pulled some candy bars out of her pockets, "I was able to steal these from Dustin." She waved them in front of you proudly. You laughed joyfully. "Nice one!" You exclaimed, snatching a Snickers out of her hand, opening it immediately. The chocolate was a little melted from being in her pocket, but you didn't care. She followed right after you, the two of you giving your candy bars a 'cheers' as you took a bite.

The two of you didn't bother to drive away from Steve's house for a while, listening to music, making fun of everyone's costumes and just soaking up each others time. After about 20 minutes of fun, you remembered there was something you had to do. There was an immediate ache in your heart, and you felt terrified, but that it was time to do it.

As the laughing died down, you began to explain, "So, um, Robin, I have to tell you something. And I really hope you won't judge me for it, but I understand if you do. There's a few things I have to tell you, actually..." you trailed off as you looked at her face, noticing a piece of chocolate on the side of her mouth. She looked at you wide-eyed. "What? What's wrong?"

You smiled at her and couldn't help but bust out a laugh. She laughed too, though she didn't know what about. That's one thing you loved about her. It was so contagious when she laughed. You wanted to stay in this moment forever. You didn't want to have to tell her anything. But you knew you had to.

Just one more moment of bliss...

"Here, you have something," you giggled, "let me get that for you." You leaned over towards her to rub the chocolate off. The giggling began to die down as you rubbed the pad of your thumb across the side of her mouth. You did it, ever so gently, and couldn't help but notice how soft her skin is, how pretty her hair looked.

When you looked into her eyes, she was gazing into yours. She half grinned and sucked her bottom lip in her mouth a bit, never taking her eyes off of you, only to glance at your own lips. She was looking at you, in a way you'd never noticed before. It seemed... loving?

"Hey, Bee?" She whispered, face inches away from yours, breathing in each other's scent.

"Yeah?" You exhaled.

"I think I already know. And I hope I'm right."

"What? What do you already know?"

Both of your faces instinctively leaned in at the same time, as you pressed your lips onto hers. It was gentle. It was romantic. Her lips were so soft, plush, just like you'd always imagined.

She pulled away first. "So... am I right?"

Tears poked at the corners of your eyes. You nodded slowly. "Yeah, you're right."

It was then you both grabbed each other's faces, holding them for another kiss, only this time, it was more desperate. You couldn't believe it. Not only did she feel the same way about you, she was different in the same way you were. You could have exploded from relief and joy right then and there.

You swiped your tongue across her lips and she whimpered, granting you access to her mouth. You both moaned into this deeper kiss. Teeth clashing, sloppy, heavy breathing, perfectly in sync-

It was then you realized you had to stop.

This wasn't fair for her either. All you wanted to do was be with her. But you wanted to be with someone else too. That someone else was Steve. You knew you couldn't have your cake and eat it, too.

You pulled away from her, wiping your tears with the sleeve of- fuck- of Steve's jacket.

Robin immediately began to apologize. "Bee, I'm so sorry. I'm so, so sorry, I knew I shouldn't have done that, I knew I shouldn't have assumed-"

You shushed her and comforted her immediately. You knew exactly what it was like to be in her position, and you didn't envy it.

"Robin, you have done absolutely nothing wrong. Do you hear me? Absolutely nothing wrong. You're right. I am into ladies. And I'm into you. And you're perfect."

She smiled, but with a melancholy look on her face. "Okay, well, then what's wrong?" she asked quietly in that sweet voice of hers.

"Nothing about you, Robin. You are so beautiful, so perfect..." you trailed off. "It's just that, I'm into guys too."

She perked up. "Well that's okay. Being bisexual is totally a thing, too!"

You smiled. "Thank you... it's just that... Steve and I..." your breathing began to shake. "Steve and I kissed last night at work, too. Because I have feelings for him too. And I have the same amount of feelings for you, too. You're so beautiful, Robin. And you deserve to be with someone that's completely devoted to you, and only you. So I can't be with you, and I can't be with Steve. It's just... it's not fair for either of you." You confessed, absolutely weeping at this point.

You didn't look up to her face to see her reaction, as you were crying into the sleeves of Steve's jacket, ashamed, riddled with guilt, but you felt a gentle, delicate hand come up to your back to comfort you, when all of the sudden, you felt a tapping on your window.

You looked up. It was Steve.

You rolled down your window.

"Hey, what are you guys still doing h- wait, Bee, are you crying?"

You sniffed, not wanting to look at his face or Robin's. You felt you didn't deserve to ever look at them again.

"Steve, please take Robin home. Or have her spend the night with you."

"What? Why? What happened?"

"I told her." You snapped, not meaning to. "I told her everything. That I like girls, that I have feelings for you, that I have feelings for her, and I've ruined everything and should've never said anything. I'm so, so sorry."

Steve stood still like a statue, in awe and worry. You got out of your car, walked over to the passenger side door, and opened it for her to get out. You felt it was the last respectful thing you could do for her.

"Bee-" she started.

"No, Robin. Please. Just go with Steve. Both of you, the both of you deserve so much better."

You got back into your car, and drove away as fast as you could. You turned your music up to drown out the sound of your breakdown, feeling like you could have possibly ruined a friendship. A pure one. One that was unbreakable. And you cried your eyes out, all the way home.

♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡

Once you walked into your apartment, feeling the most guilt you'd ever felt in your life, you tossed your keys onto the floor, and began to take off your jacket-

Steve's jacket. You were still wearing it.

"Fuck!" You cried out, peeling it off of you and throwing it onto the coffee table.

You sat down on the floor and weeped to yourself for awhile, not feeling sorry for yourself, but for your best friend's lives you just ruined, if you can even call them that anymore. Not only that, but you would surely have to call Keith in the morning to quit your job.

After you had no more tears left to cry, you decided to go take a shower. You stared at yourself in the bathroom mirror for a while, before slipping out of the red ink splattered white dress. You let the hot, steamy water run over your face for a while, and carried on your shower routine, headed to your room, and slipped into some cotton panties, and some soft, comfortable pajama shorts and tank top. Your feet were still cold from the night's chill, so you opted for some white slouch socks. You got into bed, feeling the cool sheets on your skin, and snuggled into your pillow as much as you could. Your fingers habitually went towards the bee pendant to play with, and another feeling of despair and grief washed over you.

You were nearly half asleep when you heard a few knocks on your front door, and your eyes shot open.

These were familiar knocks you knew all too well.

You couldn't face this right now. Everything just came crashing down, hardly hours ago. There was no way.

You heard the familiar, gentle knocks on your door again.

You got out of bed and walked slowly to the door, your heart threatening to jump right out of your chest.

You faced your front door, and opened it, hanging your head low in shame. You didn't have to look up to know who was standing there.

"What are you doing here?" You asked quietly, almost a whisper.

"Bee, please let me in-"

"We can't do this right now, Robin. I can't do this. I don't want to cause any more problems." You felt the lump in your throat.

She grabbed her hands with yours, and gently squeezed them.

"Bee, please just listen to me. You're not gonna hurt me. Please let me in, and just let me talk to you."

You slowly looked up at her, eyes glazing over with tears again.

She was no longer in her Freddy outfit. She was wearing an oversized shirt now, and sweatpants. Comfortable clothes. Clothes for... going to sleep in?

Her face had an empathic smile on it, her eyebrows screwed together with worry, but a smile that somehow said, 'it's okay'.

You thought about it for a moment, and realized you couldn't turn her away, not when she'd walked all the way here in her bunny slippers. The slippers you'd got her for her birthday.

You let go of her hands and sighed, stepping aside so she could walk in. You gently closed the door behind you.

"Robin, I'm so-"

She shushed you kindly, and ever so gingerly grabbed your hand.

"Can we go in your room and talk?"

You paused for a moment and nodded. She kicked off her slippers, and lead you to your bedroom. She sat down on your bed, still holding your hand, and pulled you to sit you down next to her, directly facing her.

"Bee... I need you to know that you haven't hurt my feelings."

You slightly scoffed, staring down onto the bed and not looking in her eyes, not believing her one bit.

She picked up on your energy. "I'm serious," she took a deep breath and continued, "and you haven't hurt Steve, either. We talked about it."

This is when you looked at her face, her beautiful face, a mixture of confusion and disbelief on your face. "I'm not really understanding... what's... what's happening right now?"

She smiled at you, a smile that radiated adoration for you. "I know that you didn't want to hurt me or Steve, but the thing is... We've gone through hell and back together, even before you came to Hawkins, and..." another pause as she tried to make her words make sense, "Me and him, him and I, you know, we're best friends. We both want what's best for each other. So, I'm here with you, right here, right now, because," she squeezed your hands again, "we talked about it, and it's okay."

You weren't fully grasping what she was trying to tell you. "Robin... I want you- I want to be with you, but like I told you... I still have feelings for Steve, too."

She nodded at you. "I know, and that's okay."

You were surprised. "How is it okay? How is that fair for you?"

She let go of your hand, and held up her right to tenderly cup the side of your face.

"It's just okay, and," she bit her bottom lip, looked down nervously, and looked back in your eyes, "If you want, you know, if you want me, then I want you too, and... you can have me. We can have each other."

She leaned in her face a bit closer to yours, a certain gesture you couldn't ignore. You gazed into her eyes, yours filled with tears, and glanced at her lips. Her plump, soft, pink lips. You leaned forward too, placing a hand on the side of her face and jaw.

When you pressed your lips together, it felt even better than the first time. It was long, drawn out, gentle, and you could've melted into a puddle right then and there. You both broke the kiss simultaneously, only to take a quick inhale of each others mouths, before your lips crashed together again.

You pulled her towards you, pulling her in closer, as your kisses began to pick up the pace, heavy breathing, tasting her vanilla chapstick, and the sweet candy on her tongue she must have eaten before coming here.

She took a chance and sucked on your bottom lip, earning a small moan from you, beginning feel the heat from your inner thighs. She let go with a pop, and you turned your face to the side, licking a circle inside her lips. She opened for you, your tongues now colliding, teeth beginning to clash, the embrace growing more and more desperate as each second passed. You both began to rise to your knees, holding each other tightly, not possibly getting close enough, as the two of you kept this hot, heavy pace going.

You slid your hands up her back, pulling her even closer to sit on your lap. She wrapped her legs around your waist, as you began to snake your hands down her back, towards her ass, softly running circles over her hips with your thumbs. She hummed into your mouth and raked her hands through your hair in contentment, then coming down your neck, to your collarbone, hands resting just above your breasts.

Your hands slid around to the front of her shirt, gently cupping underneath her own breasts. You broke the kiss softly, not wanting to, but feeling you had to tell her something between heavy pants.

"Robin, I've never, um, I've never gotten to this point before with a woman."

She smiled at you, half lidded, "It's okay. I haven't either. I hope that's okay."

You nodded and stared affectionately at her face, into her beautiful blue eyes, smiling, feeling intoxicated by her presence, her closeness to you.

Your hands ran down the front of her shirt, fingers slipping underneath the hem. She gave a satisfactory sigh, her hands beginning to tug under your tank top.

Everything happened so fast.

You let go of her, eagerly pulling your shirt over your head, throwing it somewhere in your room, Robin doing the same as quickly as you did.

You both took a moment to admire each other's bare chests. Her breasts were perky, so perfect, better than anything you could have ever imagined. You felt her hands smooth up your stomach, eagerly looking down at you for some kind of permission. You nodded, absolutely dazed out, and she cupped your bare breasts, running her thumbs over your hardened nipples, admiring them in awe. This action made you gasp, grabbing her hips and grinding into her, her grinding back in unison. She leaned down to kiss you again, but you caught her off guard, immediately planting your lips on her neck. She keened into you, mouth agape, as you began your assault on her soft, sensitive skin. You open mouth kissed her sloppily, making your way across her throat as she dug her nails in your back. You kissed below her right ear and she moaned your name, her voice sounding like one of an angel. Content that you had found her sweet spot, you began to suck, harder than you were planning to. Robin began murmuring things to herself you couldn't make out, blissed out in absolute euphoria. Once you'd left a pretty, hot pink bruise on that spot, you gently nibbled and kissed at it, as if to make it all better.

You began your descent down her chest, kissing and licking until your face was between her breasts. You began to massage one, gently teasing one nipple, taking the other one into your mouth, sloppily kissing and sucking on it. She groaned and arched into your face, panting as she lightly scratched down your back. You switched sides after a minute and did the same, making sure both got the same attention, her nuzzling into your neck, whispering to you just how good it felt.

You gave her a sweet, gentle kiss to her stomach, panting, needing more. You wanted to make her feel better than she ever has in her life.

You placed a hand on the small of her back and another on the back of her neck as you gently laid her down onto your bed, her messy hair pressed into a pillow.

You hovered over her, hands interwining hers and kissed her feverishly again for a moment, before pulling back to admire her face.

"Robin," you whispered affectionately, "you are so perfect. You are the prettiest girl in the world." She blushed at your confession.

"No, honey, I think that would be you." She leaned up and pressed sweet kisses onto your neck.

The endearing word she called you did something to you.

You kissed her on the lips, hard, passionate, breathless, and began to move down her body, kissing every bit of her you could, before pressing a kiss to her lower stomach, just above the line of her sweatpants, and she shivered. It was then you stopped, and sat back up, kneading into her thighs.

"Babe... do you wanna stop now?" You asked quietly.

She looked at you with hazy eyes. "No, no, I don't. I really don't. I'm just a little nervous."

You smiled at her, resting your face on her knee and giving it a peck. "It's okay, I'm nervous, too. But you are, god Robin, you are the most beautiful woman I've ever seen in the world. And I know every single part of you is beautiful, and I would love to prove that to you."

She smiled back up at you, looking almost as if she were to cry. She nodded and quietly said, "Okay. Yes.. I want to. I want you, Bee."

You crawled back over her, filled with joy, pure love, and gave her a big kiss. You both giggled nervously, but excitedly.

You leaned back again and began to tug at the waistband of her pants, stopping for a moment to make sure it was still okay. When she nodded at you again, you grinned ear to ear, pulling them down, tugging at the ankles until you peeled them off, gingerly setting them next to you on the bed.

You couldn't help but bite your lip, looking at her body, the small soaked circle on the middle of her white panties. You leaned down towards the apex of her thighs, placing a soft kiss on the wet spot she'd created. She gasped, and gave a small, adorable little laugh, before biting her own bottom lip again. You grabbed the sides of them, delicately sliding them off of her legs, placing them with her sweatpants.

You groaned at the sight of her completely bare, right in front of you. Her body was absolutely unreal, there was no way that this beautiful of a woman was lying here, on your bed, just for you.

"Robin," you panted, "you are an absolute goddess. So pretty, everything about you is so pretty."

She whimpered at your statement, thighs rubbing together for some kind of friction.

You leaned over her again, cradling the soft skin of her face. "I'm gonna do my best to make you feel so good, okay?"

She smiled and kissed the front of your neck. "Okay."

Nervous butterflies danced in your stomach as you pressed you lips towards her again, quickly setting a desperate, heavy pace. You roamed your hand down her abdomen, gently sliding your fingers through her wet folds. She moaned into your mouth as you moved your fingers up and down, collecting her slick, and she arched into your hand. You placed a finger against her entrance and she arched yet again.

You slowly inserted a digit into her. She moaned heavily into your mouth as you began to set a slow pace, trying to remember what you like about your own body. You inserted another digit, quickly curling both of them inside her to find her sweet, spongy spot. She groaned a mixture your name and expletives as you moved your fingers in and out of her, curling into that sweet spot every time.

"Bee, I'm already gonna-"

You stopped your pace and shushed her, her whimpering at the loss. "Sh, hold on baby, I'm gonna let you, but I'm gonna make it feel better than this." You gave her a tender kiss and moved down her body, grabbing a hold of underneath her knee and placing it over your shoulder, kissing the inside of her thigh, before you set the pace you had before with your fingers, and kissed her aching clit.

"Fuck," she cried, "please don't stop."

You began to lick circles around her clit with your tongue, starting to suck on it, not too hard, but not too soft. She grabbed your hair with a hand, pulling by your scalp, and cried out in pleasure, as you curled your fingers inside, licking and sucking her little button until-

"It's happening, please-"

You didn't speed up the pace, knowing that what you were doing was exactly what she needed, and you sucked and fucked your fingers in her through her high, Robin crying and grinding into your face.

As soon as her panting slowed, you removed your mouth from her now swollen clit, careful to not overstimulate her, and removed your fingers, sucking her juices from them appreciatively. You crawled over her again, grabbing her face and kissing her deeply, romantically. "Robin, you're so, so pretty. You're so pretty, babe." You affirmed her again, smoothing her hair. She smiled into your kiss, giggling a little bit.

You giggled back. "What's so funny?"

"Nothing, it's just that, I'm so happy, that felt so good... and now it's your turn."

She quickly and swiftly flipped you right over, despite her usual clumsiness, and hastily grabbed your little shorts, peeling them and your underwear off at the same time, throwing them somewhere on the floor of the dimly lit room.

She began to nip and suck on your inner thighs, smiling against your skin, as you gasped and arched into her touch, surprised by the sudden change in situation.

She leaned in and gave you a kiss on your sopping wet hole. You moaned her name and exhaled deeply, never having felt this kind of touch before.

She looked up at you with playful, almost devilish eyes. "I've always wanted to do this."

She put a leg over her shoulder, shoving her face into your heat, not easing you into it at all, and began lapping you up as if she was starved. You squeezed her head with your thighs, crying out in pleasure, and she then inserted a digit into you, instantly curling it the way you'd done to her.

"Oh, fuck, Robin-"

She quickly inserted another into you, pumping in and out of you, curling inside of you everytime she pushed into you.

You grabbed her hair desperately as she worked on you, tongue flat against your clit, swirling around it and sucking on it, moving at a faster pace everytime you moaned her name.

She was too good at this.

You grinded into her mouth and hand, feeling the yummy knot in your stomach forming faster than it ever had before. It felt as if you'd died and went to heaven, and this was it.

"Robin, I'm gonna-"

Your world crashed down around you in the best way possible as you heavily panted, eyes nearly rolling in the back of your head as she fucked you through your high.

She was absolutely otherworldly.

Once she knew you were finished, she removed her hand from the sensitive area she'd just devoured, climbing back towards you to collapse on the bed next to you, intertwining your fingers with hers as you both stared at the ceiling for a few moments, gasping for air.

"Robin," you turned your head towards her, "I've never came that quick in my life."

She smiled, absolutely giddy, "Really?"

You nodded and smiled back, "Really, that was.. amazing. I don't know how else to describe it."

She curled towards you and pulled you into her, limbs on limbs, bare chest against bare chest, as you breathed in each other's scent, the both of you feeling over the moon, feeling...

"I love you." You whispered, "Like, I'm in love with you."

She tucked your hair behind your ear, "I'm in love with you too, Bee."

"Really?"

"Really."

You nuzzled into each other for a while longer, before she kissed your forehead, and abruptly sat up to get dressed.

You reached your arms out to her and whined, "Where are you going?"

She pulled her shirt over her head, "Getting dressed, silly. There's still some unfinished business."

You shot up out of bed. "Unfinished business?"

"Yeah. Come on babe, time to get dressed."

You hesitantly got up and did as she asked, still extremely confused and nervous about what she could be talking about.

She began to walk out of the room. "I'll be right back. I just need to go outside real quick. Be back in two minutes, I promise."

You raised your eyebrow at her, sitting on the edge of your bed. "Okay..."

You fiddled with your bee pendant again, filled with anxiety, wondering what she was doing.

Finally, you heard your front door open again.

"Robin...?"

You heard her telling someone to come inside, and another set of footsteps that weren't hers. Heavier footsteps.

You instantly froze. There was no way.

Robin walked into your room with him. "Here she is."

You felt your jaw hit the floor.

There he was. Steve Harrington. In all his stupid, handsome glory. Wearing some grey sweatpants and a white t shirt. Hair somewhat messy.

You stared at him, wide-eyed, your heart beating rapidly through your chest, forgetting to breathe for a moment. Your face turned hot, cheeks burning red.

Steve looked at you sitting on your bed, a gentle look in his eyes, a loving grin on his face.

"Hey, Bee." He said softly.

You continued to stare at him, eyes darting between the two of them as they stood before you, and began to talk, voice a little louder this time.

"Robin... Steve, what's going on?"

Robin took a seat on the edge of the bed next to you, looking at you affectionately and giving your hand a reassuring squeeze.

"Remember when I told you that we talked? Steve and I?"

You nodded slowly, a confused expression on your face.

She continued, "Well, remember when I said that we just want the best for each other? Steve and I... we both have feelings for you, and we both want to be with you, and we're both okay with that, more than okay actually. Obviously, you know, there would be boundaries and stuff, because I'm gay, but... yeah. We can all just... be together." She gave you a hopeful smile, now holding both of your hands, rubbing circles into your palms.

You were quiet, trying to take everything in. You looked over to Steve, who was gazing at you in adoration, and he nodded, signaling his agreement with everything Robin said.

You took a deep breath, exhaling slowly, "Robin... Steve, I don't know what to say."

"It's okay, you don't have to say anything. We're both here for you no matter what you decide, just... think about it. In the meantime," she gestured towards Steve, "I think the two of you need to talk, too. I'm gonna give you some alone time with him."

You perked up, "Okay, um... where are you going?"

She sat up from the bed and gently let go of your hands, "I'm gonna go to Family Video, get some movies, and get some snacks and stuff, because no matter what happens, we're still having that sleepover tonight."

Steve tossed his car keys to her, her barely catching them clumsily. "Please don't fuck up my car, Robin." He looked at her earnestly, "I'm serious."

She rolled her eyes and ignored him, walking out of your bedroom door before pausing to look at you. "I'll be back soon, okay?"

You nodded. "Okay."

She smiled, put on her slippers, and left, closing the front door behind her.

You glanced up at Steve with pursed lips, and looked at the floor, staring at the plush carpet.

"So, um," he ran his hand through his hair nervously. "Can I sit down next to you?"

"Yeah, yeah... of course." You shuffled over a bit to give him space. He sat down on your bed next to you where Robin once was, sighing and clasping his hands together.

"So, how are you feeling?"

You shuffled your feet together. "Um, I don't know. A mix of feelings I guess... I'm just trying to take everything in," you perked up at him, "not that I'm not happy you're here, because I am! I just, feel guilty, ya know?"

He rested a hand on your thigh, sending a small shock wave through you. "Yeah, that's understandable. I don't want you to feel guilty though. Like Robin said, we talked about it and we're okay with it." He squeezed your thigh, causing you to sharply inhale. He looked at you worriedly.

You smiled, quickly reassuring him that the touch was okay. You gulped, "Well... what do we do now?"

"Well," he paused to think for a moment, "whatever you want. We can just talk, we can just sit in each other's presence," he chuckled a bit, "or, you can kick me out if you're not comfortable, that's okay too."

You shook your head, squeezing his hand that was still on your thigh, shuffling closer to him, leg against leg. "No, no. I want you here with me. Next to me. I like being with you." You smiled nervously at him.

He let out a sigh of relief. "Good, good... I want to be here with you, too." He stared at your hand squeezing his, before gazing into your eyes, his cheeks turning pink.

You nodded at him, biting your bottom lip nervously.

He slowly leaned towards your face, his breathing becoming hitched. You leaned your face closer to his too. He barely brushed his lips against yours, and you exhaled deeply, pressing your forehead against his and closing your eyes.

"Is everything okay, Bee?" He asked quietly.

"Um," you struggled to find the words. "It's just that, Robin and I, we were just in here kissing, and doing, ya know, other stuff, too."

He leaned back again and smiled, removing his hand from your leg and caressing the side of your face. "I know, she told me."

You looked into his eyes. "She told you?"

"Yeah. She was really happy. And she's okay with us kissing, too." He let you take in his words for a moment. "We both want to be happy, with you. But if you don't want to do anything with me tonight, or ever, that's okay too. Okay?"

You just looked into his eyes. They looked comforting, understanding, and loving. Like everything he was saying was true.

He grew a concerned look on his face when you didn't respond. As he began to open his mouth to speak, you stopped him, grabbing his face with both hands and crashing your lips onto his hungrily.

He immediately responded by doing the same, pressing his lips into yours as hard as he could, as if he'd been waiting for this moment ever since he laid his eyes on you.

You raked your fingers through his hair, another hand on his chest, as you continued to kiss each other feverishly, noses pressing together. He grabbed both of your hips, and quickly lifted you up to sit on top of him, and you wrapped your legs around him, now straddling him. He nibbled your bottom lip, causing you to gasp as he slid his tongue along where he bit you, gaining entrance into your mouth. The both of you quickly became a mess of sloppy, wet, passionate kisses, only pausing in between to gasp for air.

Hands still gripping your hips, he lightly grinded you against him, making you throw your head back and whine. He took the opportunity to now kiss on your neck, open mouth kissing, licking and sucking as he made his way to the other side of your neck. He kissed your sweet spot and you moaned, feeling him smile against your skin and began to bite and suck on that spot. You sighed his name and lightly scratched your nails up and down his back, feeling yourself become wet, walls desperately clenching around nothing.

He kissed down your neck and chest feverishly, stopping above your breasts, grabbing one into his hand as he pressed his lips over your hardened, clothed nipples. He leaned his head back and gazed into your eyes, his half lidded and dark, begging for more as he tugged at the hem of your tank top. You nodded eagerly and barely whispered out a 'yes'.

He swiftly pulled your top over your head, tossing it onto the floor, revealing your bare torso to him. He stared at your breasts, hair now a mess, his mouth slightly agape. You felt his hard length through his sweatpants at the apex of your thighs. You bit your lip as you let him admire you for a moment.

He looked up from your chest into your eyes again, before saying, "You're so beautiful. So, so beautiful." You smiled shyly at his comment, planting a kiss on his forehead. You clutched at his shirt, fisting the fabric into your hand, motioning for him to take it off. Once he got the hint, he smiled excitedly and rapidly took it off, lifting it over his head and tossing it on the floor. Now you were staring at his bare chest, memorizing all the details of it, smoothing your hands over his shoulders and biceps.

"You're so pretty, Steve." You somehow managed to say breathlessly.

He smiled at you affectionately, placing one hand onto the small of your back and tucking a piece of hair behind your ear. He pulled your head towards his and kissed you, only this time, it was gentle, soft, slow and romantic.

He pulled back and gazed into your eyes again, grinning widely.

"I love you."

You let out a small gasp.

He patiently waited for your response.

You leaned your forehead against his, giggling with joy. "I love you, too."

"You do?"

"I really do. Have for a long time."

A devilish, but playful look came across his face. He lifted you up by your ass, carrying you to the other side of the bed as you squealed with excitement. He gently tossed you onto your back, your head resting on a pillow. He climbed over on top of you, arms lifting himself up either side of your head, kissing you desperately, intensly again, a mixture of eagerness and romance and love within them, as you wrapped your legs around his lower back.

He began trailing kisses down your neck and chest again, stopping to caress your breasts, licking and kissing in between them, gently pinching your nipples. You gasped and arched into his touch, only making him want more and more of you. He continued down your stomach, leaving small, dark pink bruises, whispering how beautiful your body is, until he kissed just above the waistline of your shorts, another kiss you arched up into. He smiled and rested his head onto your hip for a moment, digging his fingers underneath the line of the fabric.

"Can I?"

"Please... yes, please Steve."

"I got you, baby."

You stomach fluttered at his last statement, as he sat up and wriggled your tiny shorts down your legs. He gravitated his head towards your cotton panties, pressing a kiss over your clothed clit. You squirmed and rubbed your thighs together as he leaned back again, this time pulling your panties down, discarding another garment somewhere in the room.

You crossed your legs together a bit before he grabbed your knees and opened them. Your face went red from embarassment.

"Don't close your legs. You're gorgeous. Everything about you is gorgeous."

His comforting words made your body relax. He leaned over you, planted a gentle kiss to your lips and said softly, "I'm gonna make you feel so good, sweet girl. I got you."

His hands snaked down your abdomen, and slid his fingers through your soaked folds, the both of you moaning quietly at the touch. He slid two digits inside of you with ease, instantly curling his fingers and finding your spongy spot. You gasped and he kissed you again, you whimpering into his mouth as he began to pump in and out of you, setting a steady pace, curling his fingers each time. You clamped around them, crying into his mouth, "More, more".

He released his lips from yours and licked and kissed down your body, hiking a leg over his shoulder, removing his fingers and slowly licking a stripe up your heat, not breaking eye contact with you. You grabbed his hair by the nape of his neck, begging him for more. He stuck his tongue inside you, licking and kissing your wet hole, before circling around your clit. You moaned shamelessly, only enticing him more, Steve now sucking on your clit relentlessly. You squeezed his head with your thighs as the knot inside of your stomach began to build again.

"Oh fuck Steve, I'm gonna-"

He immediately removed his lips from your clit with a pop, you whining at the loss of his mouth.

He sat up on his knees in front of you. "Not yet, baby, not yet. I want you to do it with me-" He began to pat and dig into his pockets, head hanging low with disappointment.

"I guess I didn't bring a condom. I'm sorry."

You shook your head, "I'm on the pill. It's okay. Please, don't stop."

He perked up again and smiled, hastily pulling down his pants and underwear, throwing them behind him.

You leaned up on your elbows a bit, staring at his quite large cock in awe, mouth beginning to water. "Holy shit, Steve." You whispered.

He gave himself a couple strokes before hovering over you again, shushing you with a smile. He looked at you softly, but excitedly, placing the pad of his thumb on your bottom lip and pulling it down a bit, giving it a small kiss.

He leaned back again, prodding the tip against your entrance. He looked up at you again to double check that this was okay, you instantly giving him a nod that said 'do it already'.

He slowly pushed himself inside you, holding the backs of your thighs as you gasped. You wondered to yourself if you were gonna be able to handle him, but he slowly pushed in more, bottoming out as he groaned. He pulled out and pushed into you with small stroaks, beginning to thrust in a slow, steady pace as your slick started to take him in easily.

He picked up the speed of his thrusts, and you felt like he had sent you to another dimension, as you murmured and moaned to yourself in absolute euphoria. Each time he pounded hard all the way into you, you clenched down on him harder and harder.

"Fuck, baby, you're so, so damn tight." He praised between pants.

You didn't respond, watching him as he continued to pound over and over again, his mouth agape, his cheeks flushed red, face nearly dripping with sweat.

He slowed his pace for a second, bottoming out as he moaned, and began his assault on your clit again.

He rubbed circles around it as he picked up his steady, but hard pace into you. You gasped and moaned more expletives, tears prodding at the corners of your eyes, as you reached your arms towards him, whining and begging for his closeness.

He grabbed your arms and pulled you forward, him sitting on his knees, slightly spread, and you now sitting on his cock, the both of you moaning loudly at the new angle, hitting that sweet spot you love so much.

You both began to grind into each other in unison, his hands grabbing your hips and moving you with his thrusts, your hands squeezing his shoulders, kissing sloppily and breathing in each other's scent. The knot inside of you began to build up again.

You tangled your fingers through his hair, yanking at the scalp.

"Steve, fuck, I'm gonna-"

"Do it with me. Cum with me, baby girl."

His thrusts started to quicken, as you shamelessly cried out his name in absolute pleasure, the knot finally releasing and pooling over his cock. He continued pounding you through your high until his thrusts began to stutter, and you felt his wet warmth spilling inside you, Steve biting onto your shoulder to stifle back an embarrassingly loud moan.

You both remained in that position for a while, panting, sweaty as you pulled each other in for a close embrace, feeling as though you could never be close enough against each other.

Steve rubbed your back affectionately, before gently pulling your head back to give you a long, soft, passionate kiss.

He gently laid you back down on your bed, him falling back into the pillows next to you as you stared at the ceiling for a moment to catch your breath.

He looked over at you and smiled, looking absolutely fucked out. You pulled his head into your chest and played with his hair, kissing him on his forehead.

"Steve, that was-"

"Amazing. Perfect." He finished your sentence.

You both chuckled and he gave you another kiss before sitting up. "Well, Bee... we gotta get dressed."

You whined a bit and said, "Can we still cuddle after?"

"Absolutely."

You helped each other get dressed and crawled back under the covers, him spooning you from behind, planting kisses on your neck that made you shiver, brushing his fingers over your back.

You stayed like this with each other for a while before you heard the front door open again.

A familiar voice announced, "Hey guys, I got some snacks and picked up Labyrinth, and no, Steve, I didn't fuck up your car-"

Robin stopped as she entered your bedroom, seeing the two of you cuddling.

She dropped the bag she was carrying and excitedly said with a squeal, "Is it cuddle time?!"

You smiled wide and reached your arms out towards her, grasping at air for her.

She kicked off her bunny slippers again, her hair now tied up in a messy bun, and eagerly crawled under the covers with you. She nuzzled her face into your chest, kissing it and hummed happily. You kissed her on top of her head and held her to your body tightly. Steve contently chuckled and kissed your neck again, still spooning you from behind, you snuggled right in between the two loves of your life.

"I love you guys."

"We love you more, Bee." They announced in unison.

♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡

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