#saying this bc i was thinking of how the second awakenings get no kind of extreme fanfare

[samarecharm]

For someone who has such a soft spot for monkey anthros and monkey-adjacent creatures (chimchar my beloved), i am shocked that it never crossed my mind to sketch up Seiten Taisei, the coolest little monkey in the world…

[necrotic-nephilim]

Dicktim for the ask game:

Dick starts to have feelings for Tim, but he's scared because he's absolutely convinced he's straight. He goes so far as to even try to kiss Roy, which… doesn't make things better between them, and Garth which was just wet. And then Tim starts the transition as a woman, and Dick be like, ahhhh, so that's what it was. He can work with it :D

for the ask game!

!!! transfemme Tim supremacy. god i love any flavor of trans/genderqueer Tim. especially when everyone around Tim is either supper supportive or instantly clocks them as an egg, it's delightful. here are some thoughts (note: i'm using he/him for Tim up until transitioning just bc. ease of understanding)

having feelings for Tim comes with equal confusion and guilt. Dick has known Tim since he was a young teen and even now that Tim is growing into an adult, Dick is hyperaware of the implications that could come with it. but more than that, he's just *confused*. he doesn't mind the jokes about his sexuality because he knows he's comfortable with it. he experimented a bit in his teens and came to the firm, comfortable understanding that he's straight. so feelings for Tim are. confusing, to say the least. before Tim comes out, he's not particularly obvious about being an egg. he's only dated girls, even has a bit of a skater boy persona going on, so it's not easy to clock how deep in denial he is. so Dick is baffled on every level. he's googling it, kissing his prettiest male friends to see if maybe he is bisexual and this is just a late awakening. but it's definitely not and it's definitely just a complex for Tim. for a while Dick lives in denial of it convincing himself some wires got crossed or something because he would never like a guy and he'd especially never like Tim, someone who should be a little brother to him. and for a while, it almost works. Dick is able to compartmentalize and bury the feelings so deep he's mostly functioning around Tim, save for staring a little too long when he notices Tim is letting his hair grow out and watching Tim apply stage makeup to cover bruises. but he's mostly fine.

it's the Caroline Hill cover that gets Dick to break. Tim is trying to be as casual as he can about the idea of going undercover as a woman. Tim doesn't want anyone to think about why that would be his cover of choice so he just blames it on being so androgynous and no one really comments bc really, they've all had their weird fake identities. but when Tim has the long hair, the flawless makeup, and just a little fake padding in the right places it makes Dick choke. which feels horrifically objectifying to Dick and he feels even worse about his crush now. especially the way Tim talks when dressed up as Caroline. a softer voice that's clearly trying to be more feminine. and there's just. the way Tim seems so *comfortable*, as Caroline. like this is a natural, second skin to Tim. it sends Dick on a panicked spiral, wondering if this counts as some kind of horrible fetish or something. he's so guilty he probably vents to Donna or Wally about it, just to get his feelings out about the whole thing. they comfort him and talk him through it, finally convincing him to just talk to Tim. because the worst that happens, Tim rejects Dick and Dick can properly move on. and the best that happens, Dick can explore this weird feeling.

of course, Dick chooses the most awkward way to do it. instead of just talking to Tim about his feelings, he casually mentions Caroline Hill and how nice Tim looked. how it seems almost natural for Tim. and Tim *panicks*. because this is the first time anyone has called it out, and Tim is as deep in the closet as you can get. he ends up awkwardly mumbling that he liked being Caroline a lot, hoping the conversation will be dropped. but Dick presses and Tim ends up. accidentally coming out in a rushed word vomit that Dick barely understands. it ends with Dick blinking a few times and finally softly asking if Tim wants to be called Caroline with she/her pronouns. and when he gets a small yes, Dick immediately switches. he's so caught up in supporting Caroline, he doesn't immediately think about the crush. it takes a few days of watching her come out to everyone else and wear her hair more femininely, put on makeup, before Dick is suddenly *very* rudely reminded of his crush. because Caroline just seems a lot happier as a girl, and it seems so obvious now that she's out. she redesigns her suit to be more clearly female and that's when Dick can't hide the crush anymore. not for lack of trying, but the first time Red Robin patrols and clearly is a woman, Dick walks straight into a pole. (bonus points if Caroline's new suit is very unternet inspired, being visibly Nightwing-inspired just to make it worse for Dick) and Caroline, who's still anxious about her transition and being perceived as a woman, at first thinks it's about that. which leads to Dick awkwardly explaining his crush and well. in a way, it's the most gender-affirming thing for a straight person to have a crush on Caroline before she even came out.

their relationship is slow and careful, especially anything sexual. Dick is still acutely aware of the age difference and how they met muddling things, but Caroline brushes all of those concerns. she's an adult, she's consenting, and dear god who hasn't had a crush on Dick Grayson. i think it's sort of funny if when they start dating, Dick forgets to mention that Caroline is Tim Drake, who transitioned as a trans woman. so he talks about his girlfriend Caroline to his friends, who are very confused about who this Caroline girl is. Steph and Cass help Caroline learn silly things like "girl code" and Dick is prepared to curbstomb anyone who misgenders her. he's ready. probably a little too ready. their relationship flows so naturally Dick doesn't know how he didn't clock it before. his crush just feels obvious now. he doesn't want to be overbearing and wants to make sure she's going at her comfortable pace with her transition. but Dick is the type of ally boyfriend to google *everything* and help Caroline through deciding if and how to go onto hormones, how to legally transition, all of it. it's their version of date night. that and patrolling together, but that one is a given. it doesn't take long for the public to figure out that Nightwing and Red Robin are together (i think it's funny if no one can decide if there's a new Red Robin or if the old one transitioned. it's a hotly debated thread on reddit.) because of how affectionate Dick is. and of course Caroline just bluescreens under any affection from Dick bc this is her childhood crush, absolutely smitten for her.

i love exploring sexual headcanons for trans characters bc it's different for everyone. i'm a bottom Tim truther, so i think bottom Caroline works great in a gender-affirming sort of way, with Dick using very feminine words in sex. i do still think she would dom Dick, riding him or edging him. it's not what Dick expected, but he'll definitely take it. Caroline just likes reducing Dick to a begging mess. i also think there would be a mommy kink. i believe in Tim being called mommy even when he's not trans, so if she's trans, she's *definitely* being called mommy. gender affirmation and kinky fuckery. two birds one stone. she also likes letting Dick braid her hair and help her do her makeup. Dick buys her all kinds of nice lingerie to try on and then ruin during sex. it's a win-win for everyone.

[beanghostprincess]

WOMEN MY BELOVED

Okay but Shanks being SUCH A SIMP is so hilarious and also RIPE FOR CHAOS. She needs a non-fruit user for some of it ((maybe up to and including some seastone experiments)), and Mihawk either can't or Won't ((or, and he refuses to admit it, doesn't exactly want to run the risk of hurting her or Croc if there's Residue)). Now she has the Best Little Guinea Pig Ever.

Shanks never considered himself to have a weird k!nk for unhinged scientist clown women, but hey, Buggy awakens things in him, what can he say?

Also imagine the exchanges there.

B: "so we're gonna take this bomb, and I'm gonna throw it at you. And you're gonna cut it, and see if the explosion causes any damage."

S: "I dunno, Bugs, it could be kinda dangerous-"

B: "if you do, I'll kiss you."

S: "YES MA'AM!!!!"

GODS AND YEAH THE OUTFITS

Personally, I think she'd either be fairly The Same as far as outfits go, for practicality, but she also is friends with Alvida, and she's a Flashy Princess, so OBVIOUSLY there's gonna be some SKIN. And just... imagine for a moment.

A gathering for/of pirates. No I do NOT care that it's not a Canon feasible event. Moving on.

Pirate Gathering. A Dress Code. Formal.

Clown Princess in Princess Dress.

Clown Woman In Any Dress. And HEELS. and if it gets uncomfortable, she just detaches her ankles and floats while her feet rest at their table.

Crocodile and Mihawk get to coordinate with her a lil bit, and they both get to watch her bounce around and just grin bc no matter who she charms or spends time with or Spends Time With (👀), she's still theirs. Open relationships.

Also also - consider Luffy and crew being there. Sanji is SWOONING. Nami is disgusted to be a clown fucker, but she's also Looking. There's bets being plaxed on Who Will Flirt First and one of Who Will Be Most Successful.

Luffy meanwhile is splitting his time between FOOD, FRIENDS, and AUNTIE HI HOW ARE YOU I LOVE YOUR DRESS.

She acts all annoyed and put out but she and Luffy CLICK in a way few ever have, their brands of Unhinged and Feral are complimentary.

((Extra Bonus, maybe it's a gathering for the Emperors. Shanks is there too. He is frothing at the mouth bc AAAAA LUFFY and AAAAA BUGGY and AAAAA LOOK AT THEM TOGETHER.

The only way we include Teach in this is if he's in Dirty Baby Jail, hit on Buggy and got OBLITERATED, or Buggy point blank 'seduces' him to knock him out, steal his treasure, and then locked him in a closet with seastone cuffs and a toothbrush.))

I love seeing an ask starting with "women my beloved". It makes a lesbian's day. Do not stop loving women.

This is all amazing. Thank you. Yes. Absolutely. Shanks would let Buggy do anything to him and he'd thank her and honestly? Understandable. While Mihawk and Crocodile just see their girl do her own stuff with pleased smiles on their faces. If their clown wants to torment people with her silly shenanigans and lethal inventions, who are they to intervene?

And the outfits would kind of be the same, yeah, but she'd definitely want to catch people's attention. Maybe at first she still wears the same things, but after a while of feeling comfortable in her body and with her identity? She has a closet full of clown-themed outfits. Beautiful dresses. She has everything. From classy, more sophisticated dresses to sillier outfits. Everything is provided by Crocodile because now Buggy is some kind of beautiful Barbie he dresses and watches explode things. "This Barbie is a pyromaniac clown" but like, literally.

Sanji and Nami are having a moment™. Leave them alone. It's understandable. Sanji is shameless about it, though, while Nami is questioning her entire persona (that's only like the first five seconds tho). Zoro wants to get out of there and he can't stand them (<- gay gay homosexual gay) but at least he has a chance to talk to Mihawk again so, whatever. And Luffy won't stop annoying Buggy but she secretly loves the kid a ton, and he won't stop telling her to go "boom boom" on stuff together while they catch up and that's something she can't say no to.

Shanks is going through a heart attack, by the way. I heard those AAAAAAAAAAAAs in his voice. He's SO happy to see Luffy. And SO excited to see Buggy like that. And SO thrilled to see them together getting along. He can't get rid of Mihawk and Crocodile who're staring at him menacingly (because yes, they have an open relationship with Buggy but that does not mean Shanks gets to hurt her again. So they try to be careful even when they know he's pretty much her silly toy now to try her new inventions on) but he doesn't really care about it.

[xanyiaz]

guys i AM 'the' gavin, avior, porter and camelopardalis fan 🙏🙏‼️and here's why @plaqying :

I MADE GAVIN IN THE SIMS 💀💀 and also posted several fanarts of him (on my friend's behalf):

also i wrote this essay about him:

lemme just write an essay about vincent and gavin for a second-

so i was relistening to this audio earlier *the vincent audio after lovely got kidnapped*

and he talks about how he was kind of an asshole before because he was only ever thinking short-term and only ever flirting with people as a means to eventually feed from them. but lovely and what they went through with adam changed him because it made him realise that he had changed. he had become different from how he was as a human, but lovely made him remember that version of himself - like they awakened the vincent that, although still being very flirty, he sees and embraces them as they are, and doesn't just flirt to feed but because he wants to, because he loves to, since he loves them. it reminds me of my other favourite character gavin - how he's also an asshole in the beginning (i have a type ig 💀) but it's only because other people only saw him as sex, as a tool to get off with, but not as just he is. they ignored the best part of him - his heart. they forgot he even has one because they were too busy wrapping themselves up in a fantasy with him, only to then throw him away once they're finished. but freelancer stuck around. they saw him for how he is. not as an incubus, just as "gavin". i love characters like this - that, at first glance, just seem a certain way, but underneath all that, the flirty exteriors, are the most beautiful beings with hearts of gold. and both of them are so patient; they didn't expect anything in return, after all, why would they? everyone else only wanted them for their flirty self or to use them for their body, not for their soul. lovely helped vincent realise that he had grown too used to putting up a false flirty front and that because of that, he had forgotten who he was underneath all that - a caring, loving person who also encourages lovely to become a better person; and freelancer, who got helped by an incubus and some silly lil elementals to realise that it's ok to reach out for help sometimes and that doing so isn't a burden on others, helped gavin realise that people want to be around him for more reasons than just sex, he is deserving and worthy of much more than that.

in short i'm so incredibly sane about them and love them a totally normal amount i promise.

---

wrote 2 POEMS based on avior and starlight:

also i imagined this: if starlight had/has pimples or spots or freckles and disliked them or felt insecure because of them i just KNOW avior would like- compare them to the stars and the night sky and kiss every one lightly, showering them with love until they start believing themself that they are as beautiful as avior says. this is how i imagine it:

slight sovereign state spoilers ig ??

starlight: "i'm breaking out so much, look how many pimples i have showing."

avior: "hey, don't say those things about yourself. all your spots and details and everything about you considered an "imperfection" by yourself, or anyone else, are my favourite parts of you. they paint star constellations all over you, and every time i look at you, i just want to plant kisses over each and every one of them. we may not have had any indicators of what time of day it was when we were stuck in hell together, but you were and still are my night sky, my sunshine, my whole universe, all the stars in my galaxy. every time i look at you, i see that all over you. your so called "imperfections" ignite my soul. you're my everything, starlight. never hate anything about yourself. and do not doubt even for a single second that the way i feel about you would change because of all your beautiful details. you are the stars that light up the galaxy of my heart. starlight, star bright, the stars in your eyes light up my life."

---

look how many porter headcanons i wrote RAAHHHHH:

- under people's skin or in contrast, how to charm and flatter people, he's SO charismatic and knows exactly how to get what he wants

- he has dyed tips of his hair- like i imagine it being either white/light grey or black and then like red or purple or blue dyed tips and like it's longish shoulder length but styled like miyamura from horimiya

- he likes board games but ESPECIALLY cluedo

- he likes wine-tasting

- he has heterochromia eyes- either like blue and red or blue and purple

- he wears corsets 🤭

- he wears HELLA jewellery- skull rings and loads of ear piercings and like a tooth necklace or something and just LOADS of vintage jewellery

- he knows how under people's skin or in contrast, how to charm and flatter people, he's SO charismatic and knows exactly how to get what he wants

- but also- he's so used to charming people or putting on a show/facade that, when people do genuinely want to get to know him and be close with him, he's reluctant and inexperienced- most people don't stick around after they get what they want from him, which is why he's so interested in & curious about treasure, why he's so enamoured with them bc they also seem so enamoured with him and he wants to understand why.

- also he has the sluttiest waist ever and he's so babygirl- wbk but i had to say it anyways 💀

also i made a playlist for him ofc <3

---

i also made these edits of gavin, gavin (again) + cam and porter (edited him twice) (can't believe i haven't edited avior yet smh):

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---

camelopardalis my love <33

---

i have made more posts about all of them but it would take too long to scroll so you'll just have to take my word for it 😭‼️also i LITERALLY have most of gavin's audios memorised by now- and also porter's first audio- trust i am all of their biggest fan 🙏🙏 but also if i don't win- that's fair enough lol good luck to everyone 🫶🫶

[mikkaeus]

house md fic recs — short fics (<10k). hilson + rarepairs

Other house rec lists: long fics | episode tags | postcanon | infidelity trope (all of these are mutually exclusive apart from the infidelity one)

highly recommend not skipping out on the non-hilson fics!! scroll to the end for a list of some really great ones. No huddy though because I'm not the biggest fan.

house/wilson and gen fic

I decided to just lump the gen fic together with the slash because really most of them can be read as slash with a G rating. Before we get into the fics, here are some notable authors that have written several house fics. Not all their fics are going to be listed individually, but if I have the author there I've read all or a lot of their stuff and enjoyed it, so I recommend going through their backlog.

otter: Some really excellent prose and great atmosphere. A little soft, a little pensive. And they nail the characterisation and dialogue.

ignaz: im sure everyone has read ignaz's longfic (a modest proposal and its sequel — the one where house and wilson get married so wilson cant testify against house in the tritter arc) but absolutely check out all their other stuff — it's all quality.

bironic: I really enjoy the bit of edge in bironic's fics. It makes them so yummy.

bethfrish: What stands out about their fics is how they peer into all the pointy edges of Wilson and Julie's relationship, thus making them excellent and unique Wilson character studies. Great prose and dialogue that rivals the show's.

Transformatron: fics that are transcendent and porny, all featuring a d/s undertone or theme (wilson as the dom)

astolat: if u dont know astolat idk what to say to u. just go read their fics.

blackmare (livejournal / ao3 pseud 1 / ao3 pseud 2 / lj pseud third_owl for slash fics i think) Does really great short fics (mostly gen) that slot into episodes. Like meta but in fic form. All of them are worth a read. Some of their fics are on ao3 but a lot aren't (like nearly all the episodic ones).

Namaste (livejournal / ff.net): Some short fics, some much longer ones. Mostly gen focussing on H&W friendship, with some fics on canon pairings. Interesting character studies and exceptionally discerning prose that is a pleasure to read.

In order of length. *faves, ***underrated faves

***Touch by zulu (<1k) (2007) The number of ways House could embarrass him with touches, Wilson thinks, is practically endless.

Silent Sigh by thedeadparrot (<1k) (2009) Wilson, autumn, melancholy, and House. Second person.

Heartbeats by thedeadparrot (<1k) (2009) Three moments in which House and Wilson are almost kind of functional.

No Pain by bironic (<1k) (2008) House finds a permanent solution to his pain problem and convinces Wilson to give him what he needs. Vampire fic! Frottage! hell yeah.

Also check out the sequel: No Mercy by daasgrrl (3k)

***The Game of Wilson: Six Cards in a Five Card Game by paradisecity (1k) (2006) If you're going to play a game like moving in together, decide upon three things at the start: the rules of the game, the stakes, and the quitting time. Fun and snappy. Great dialogue.

*we're getting good at this by ad astra dean (1k) Wilson had a migraine. Established relationship. Soft and sweet and realistic esp after 8.19. fuck. Premium hurt/comfort.

**********three more stories by besselfcn (1k) The first time it happens is (New Orleans, 1991 | Albany, 2009 | Augusta, 2012) and they are (drunk | sober | out of time). This fic emotionally obliterated me. I’m obsessed with the format like it’s prose halfway to poetry, so creative and unique and well-executed??? I cried so much. I am UNWELL and immeasurably fucked up about them put me in my grave. (Yeah I said these lists were mutually exclusive but this fic is the exception bc idc)

The Awakening of Wils-Ankh-Amun, Royal Concubine by blackmare, Nightdog_barks, pwcorgigirl (1k) It was a rather unusual 'morning after.' This is hilarious. Reads like a classic prank episode. They're so dumb together I love them.

The One Where House Has Always Been a Woman by thedeadparrot (1k) (2009) Despite the hospital gossip, House is not, in fact, a man-hating lesbian. Genderswapped House but not Wilson.

Gray Morning by starlingthefool (1k) All he remembers is that the transition between a stupid joke and the meeting of mouths was almost seamless. Christmas fic that takes place one year after "Merry Little Christmas" (3.10).

Loser Day Blues by blackmare, Nightdog_Barks (1k) February fourteenth is just another day, and another evening in which Wilson winds up at House’s, although — this time — not for the usual reasons.

*indefinable by PaintedVanilla (1k) House can hear Wilson getting ready for bed; he can hear him brushing his teeth, undressing, being unusually quiet. Normally there’s a humming; a breathless energy that House won’t admit to loving about him. He doesn’t hear it tonight. It’s dead silent.

criteria by PaintedVanilla (2k) “I don’t think they know that we’re married.”

***We Live Together in a Photograph of Time by ignaz (2k) Wilson's hair curls when they're fucking. God I'm devastated. The ✨atmosphere✨. This is so in character. And can we talk about the banger title and summary??? I was gnawing my arm before I even opened the fic. Set in s4.

***Things To Do Before You Die by thedeadparrot (2k) In which Wilson turns thirty-eight and a half, thinks about kittens, and doesn't have a midlife crisis. But not necessarily in that order. Prank war with a twist. I’m so fond. Hits all the right cadences with the writing.

So Let Us Melt, and Make No Noise by ignaz (2k) (2007) "You kill patients all the time," House said. "You never stay at work until--" He peered at the clock. "--Four in the morning to make sure they're really dead."

***Curiosity by Namaste (2k) (2006) From Cameron's perspective. Fun character study of her and by extension House and the other two musketeers. Not shippy.

Welcomed Change by JammiesDodger (2k) A cute G-rated getting together fic.

Alone, Together by daasgrrl (2k) Finding new ways to be intimate.

*Keep Your Eyes Wide by deepimpact (2k) There is no specific amount of time passed, no big event, no one thing that Wilson can pin as the catalyst. Obsessed with this. Great atmosphere, excellent prose, and and everything feels authentic and in character. Set pre-season/s1.

***Carrion Eaters by ignaz House, in some indeterminate future or an alternate universe, from the perspective of a new hire. I really loved this story. It's sharp and sad, with great build up.

***Projection by bironic (2k) Remember Ali, that really pretty 17/18 year old clinic patient that was obsessed with House? This fic is Wilson's elaborate fantasy about fucking her, which is of course as much about House as it is her. Post 3.04.

***No Exchange of Payment by otter (2k) The gifts that House gives to Wilson. I adore this. It's about the little things. Otter has exceptional prose and always nails the characterisation, which makes their writing a real pleasure to read.

***All the Effects of Intoxication (3k) by otter This only happens when they're drunk. Just as yummy as that one-line description suggests. I love this a lot — the characterisation and dialogue are excellent and I think this scenario is very realistic for them.

Leave This Harbor for the Sea by otter (3k) House was never the kind of friend who'd help you move, even when he'd had two good legs, not to mention two good arms perfectly capable of lifting boxes. He'd always been the sort of friend who'd stop by while you were packing, make cutting remarks about the failures of your romantic relationships, and use all the half-filled boxes as an excuse to root through your things.

***the growing up, the falling down by riceonrye (3k for the series) Wilson is trying to buy a nice make-up present for his girlfriend, but there’s a guy in the shop with him brazenly shoplifting. Wilson, meet House. This is so good!!! I grinned like an idiot all the way through. It captures the throw-bottles-at-windows side of Wilson so well. A very cute AU of a different first meeting whilst still remaining true to the characters. Don't forget to read the sequel as well.

***never rains (but it pours) by Transformatron (3k) So... remember that episode where House can't pee? I present you some excellently written pisskink pwp. Nails the hilson dynamic, so even if piss isn't your thing, give it a go?

***Blind Spot by blackmare, Nightdog_Barks (3k) Wilson becomes blind after a head injury. genfic.

***Four Blocks South of Eden by bethfrish (3k) If you wanted paradise, you're a little off. I loved the tentative, slightly off-kilter feeling of this. Bang on characterisation, dialogue, and use of 2nd person POV (House). Set in s1 — Wilson's marriage is falling apart, and it leads to a night that could be the start of something new.

***Lie To Me by zulu (4k) It's terribly simple. No one ever dies, and everybody lives happily ever after. Exuberant ketamine summer House!!! Equal parts sexy and heartbreaking. Check out the sequel as well (1k).

Stumbling Towards Something Real by ignaz (4k) House and Wilson on holiday in Mexico. (A flagrant excuse for smut, basically.) I'm soft. In character and well-written.

Goes the Neighbourhood by Dee_Laundry (4k) One month into their permanent positions, the new fellows catch a case on the weekend and have to track House down.

***Easy by GoldStarGrl (4k) James Wilson is the easiest person in his dorm. At McGill. In all of eastern Canada, maybe. A fleshed-out version of their first meeting, as well as an insightful character study of Wilson. Slots nicely into canon, whether you believe in the "wilson has cheated on every wife with house" version or the "they fucked when they first met and never talked about it again" version. I really enjoyed this — they’re beautifully in character, and it's excellent writing.

***A Momentary Lapse of Reason by otter (5k) Wilson and Julie through House’s eyes, from the beginning to the end. Skips back and forth between the past and now. The quiet yearning!!! Also *standing on the table with a megaphone* have i mentioned how GORGEOUS otter's prose is??

*Blow the Candles Out by bethfrish (5k) Another year older, another year wiser, another divorce lurking just around the corner. So good!!! Wilson celebrates his birthday amongst the detritus of his marriage. The prose is really exceptional here. House's dialogue is also especially well done. It's a fun read that holds up well on a re-read.

***midnight rain by GoldStarGrl (5k) Wilson can't possibly know the pain. But he wants to. I am vibrating!!! Set precanon, in the aftermath of the infarction. Infidelity, spanking, hello??? Hot, vivid, excellent characterisation, excellent writing etc etc. A+ no notes.

***Through The Looking Glass (The Male Gaze Mashup) by zulu (5k) "If Wilson didn't know, great. What he didn't know couldn’t hurt him. If Wilson did know, it didn't matter, because if he hadn't berated House for it yet, then it was permission to continue." Interesting character study of Wilson and the way House slots into his life. Imaginative and fun descriptions. I did feel slightly lost at some points but it was still a great read. Excerpt: House tears open every envelope, even those addressed to Occupant, then brings back the well-read contents like a cat offering half-dead moles to its hunting-deficient human.

Empathy, Inc. by sassyjumper (5k) Cuddy hires a company that provides 'empathy training' to doctors. House reacts. Set in an earlier season.

***All's Fair In Love (and war) by Transformatron (6k) House and Wilson are enjoying the last day of their holiday when an urgent call comes through from Princeton-Plainsboro - a medical mystery that only House can solve. And he does intend to solve it, despite Wilson's best efforts to distract him. (Established relationship.) Wilson making House do a case whilst fucking him?? I'm an absolute sucker for this trope and I was delighted to find a fic with it.

A Towered Citadel by Namaste (7k) A differential diagnosis for Wilson’s serial cheating.

***And the Borders of Old Cities Get Redrawn by blackmare (7k) Continuation/canon divergence from 8.02 "Transplant". Ch1 is the most perfect episode tag I am vibrating . The way they fall back into their old rhythm!! House seeking out his touch like a cat and Wilson accepting it, even liking it!! The hints of pre-relationship are so delicious. (This is a rare slash fic from blackmare.) Ch2&3 are also absolutely brilliant!! Great characterisation, pacing, and tension-building.

A Voice in Ramah (Welcome to Holland) by ignaz (8k) Cuddy POV on her pregnancy journey. Diverges from the show. Really well done. ignaz did this topic and Cuddy's character justice. I also particularly liked House in this one.

Singapore by thedeadparrot (8k) (2009) In which the boys go to a medical conference in Singapore, House has a few surprises up his sleeve, and Wilson figures some things out.

*A Helping Hand by bironic (9k) Wilson has an unusually rough day and House decides (somewhat despite himself) to help. Things go further than he planned. A believable foray into non-platonic territory, set in between 2.22 (Forever) and 2.24 (No Reason). What better way to take your mind off your patients than a good-ol handjob between friends? Chuck in an absolutely delicious fucked-up overtone characteristic of them and we're golden.

Rarepairs

Chase/House

***pretty doctor by spqr (5k) AU where Chase is a hooker. House becomes obsessed with him after he off-handedly gives the correct differential diagnosis. spqr is an excellent writer that I've followed across multiple fandoms, and this fic did not disappoint. Well-written, great chemistry, hilarious. I could read 100k of this.

***atonement in the locker room after hours by missaa (2k) robert chase makes two mistakes in one day Tags: Unhealthy Coping Mechanisms, degradation, God Complex, Catholic Guilt This is just as yummy as those tags make it sound. Someone needed to capitalise on the whole *waves hand vaguely* thing that Chase has going on and by god did this person rise to the occasion. Love the characterisation and the elegant prose, and the structure that flashes back and forth between two scenes. I'm insane!

Chase/Foreman Shoutout to ignaz who sold me on this pairing.

*Pretty Harsh (Confirmatory Testing Remix) by everybodylies (2k) Foreman might have flirted with Chase six months ago for like thirty seconds. Chase can't stop thinking about it.

***Two For The Road by ignaz (3k) For the first ever Foreman Fest, prompt 107 -- "after a break and enter gone wrong, Foreman and Chase are both sentenced to 300 hours of community service, which it looks like they're gonna spend picking up trash on the side of the road." Really solid writing (I mean it’s ignaz), believable characterisation and relationship building. I love them 💓💓💓 just overall a real pleasure to read. Also it's hilarious.

***Eric Foreman Doesn't Take It Up The Ass (But If He Did, It Might Happen Something Like This) by ignaz (6k)

Self-Defense, or The One Where Foreman Teaches Chase How to Throw a Punch by ignaz (1k)

Cameron/Foreman/Chase

Third Wheel Rolling by ignaz He's not jealous, but he's been the third wheel for so long that it's hard to tell the difference. Sexy + great characterisations.

Cuddy/Stacy

***Your Reflection and Mine by Starlingthefool (3k) Sweet, hot, well written.

Amber/Thirteen

***Hate (to the power of 13) by ijemanja (2k) (lj) Porny, with snappy writing and believable characterisations.

Hen Night by zulu (<1k) This is how breakups go. Amber's seen movies.

Release by zulu (1k) Wilson dies on the bus instead of Amber.

Chase/Wilson

Erase by bethfrish (<1k) Featuring a bar and crossdressing. Precanon. Second person, Wilson POV.

Patrick Bateman/Wilson

Just Like You, Only Worse by bethfrish (1k) Ok before you raise your eyebrows at the pairing, give it a chance. Bethfrish is an excellent writer. This fic is really a Wilson character study, and it's an interesting read. Second person POV Wilson, set in s1.

[leclerced]

Sorry but im gonna go into Landoscar a bit more. I know you’re not writing driver x driver but here it’s necessary that I write this so my mind can rest😌

I think it’s like Lando and Bunny would say they have an open relationship but not for everyone everywhere just the people they agree on (well still about 10 or so people). Oscar goes with it because he doesn’t feel like he’s in the place to tell them he’s not into it (and they don’t ask because he went with it when they decided they want to be in a relationship so they assumed it was fine).

Oscar’s not really okay when they share only Bunny. But then Lando has his kind of late bi awakening (you know he’s like “wait i have a boyfriend and it means I’m not straight anymore so I can think of other men too? Oh how cool is that” just Lando things😀) so he starts experimenting with others too. And it’s another thing they don’t talk about because Lando assumes Oscar does the same since he’s so sure in himself. So Oscar is just so angry and feels possessive because he has a boyfriend AND a girlfriend and still he doesn’t feel like he has anyone. So most of his possessiveness goes towards Bunny because he doesn’t know if he can or should be the same with Lando (my boy knows so little I feel sorry for him😭) but there are rare times when he just can’t help himself and when Lando talks (ESPECIALLY WITH CARLOS OKAY THEIR BEEF AND UNFRIENDLINESS WINS OVER THE FACT HES LANDOS FRIEND) with someone he comes up to them and puts an arm around Lando’s shoulders from behind and squeezes him lightly or when he knows that Lando made out with someone when he comes from that someone with Bunny so when he kisses Lando he curls his hand around his throat and just dominates him hard.

But then the fact that Oscar doesn’t feel the best in this arrangement comes out and Lando asks if he’s not jealous of him because there were signs with Bunny definitely more obvious than with him and Oscar is just like “I know you’re not the most bright person sweetheart but haven’t caught up with the fact that I always came to you when you were talking wit us someone? It’s just that we’re official but still not everyone knows we are boyfriends. People think we’re Bunny’s boyfriends”

So next day Lando kisses Oscar in the paddock in the middle of the day so that everyone knows where the three of them stand. Oscar loves every second of it and feels like he can finally be more touchy with Lando. I feel like Lando would be just so proud of himself after that and on every occasion be like “Oh yes you see my BOYFRIEND AND GIRLFRIEND …” , “Here’s our winner, my BOYFRIEND by the way if you still hadn’t caught up”, “my beautiful GIRLFRIEND…” and so on for quite a while before everyone would be like okay mate you’re bi and you have a boyfriend and a girlfriend, we know that they’re amazing, beautiful, talented and all but can you stop for fuck’s sake?

It’s long and doesn’t make a lot of sense sorry about that but it was like a dam broke in my brain when I started

oscar hates carlos even more after him and lando are boyfriends bc carlos hugs lando every time he sees them plus they have that weird thing where they hit each other in the balls, that gets under oscar’s skin like nothing else. he doesn’t want carlos anywhere near bunny or lando.

everyone being soo annoyed w him even bunny and oscar get tired of it after awhile, it was endearing at first but they don’t want or need more attention drawn to them than there already is and lando just won’t shut up!! oscar would be like i have a name. you could also call me a friend. or a teammate. and lando’s like /: but you’re my boyfriend?? and bunny’s like yea its cute sometimes but when you shout out “thats my girlfriend” every time you see me.. it’s kinda over doing it babe

[the-priestess-of-dawn]

thinking abt ur validar post because i actually thought about that a little in my stupid werewolf fic. I had to really sit down and be like "what the fuck would people even FIND attractive about this guy enough to have a baby" and I didnt wanna just use the occult angle and it hit me that Validar isn't self-caring because he hates he's not the vessel he wanted and yeah he definitely IS the equivalent of That Parent. You know the one. What I'm saying is maybe there's a commentary to be made here abt how the Plegian people and him in turn felt so dehumanized in general after a point even the extremist sects of Grimleal were better bc well, if you become food for Grima/BECOME Grima's body then you're useful and good and righteous. What gets me is Plegia isn't poor, either, but its poor in sustainability outside the ocean... idk, a lot of food for thought with Validar here. I didn't expect to think abt him in FEH so deeply but here we are.

Honestly it's kind of embarrassing how much I HAVE deeply thought about Validar. I've been wanting him to get into FEH for a long time now. A lot of his lines in Awakening are so poorly written that it's hard to make sense of him as a person. But even though you can't really argue that he's in any way sympathetic in the text... For me at least, there's no such thing as a completely unsympathetic villain, and I can't help feeling sorry for both him and the other members of the Grimleal...

I mean, yeah, when Aversa explains that Plegia suffering under Gangrel was useful because it drove the people to worship, I think we ARE supposed to feel bad for the common people. But I think it's easy to fall into a trap of trying to distinguish those ordinary citizens from the evil, manipulative leaders like Validar just a little bit too much. Aren't they all trapped in the same vicious cycle, in the end?

Over the course of the game, we occasionally fight some Grimleal enemies who are... really just nasty, and not supposed to be given a second thought at all. But I can't help but be moved that they call out to Grima with their dying words... "Master Grima... my life force... is yours..." (Chalard, Chapter 8). "Lord Grima... Rain down... retribution..." (Jamil, Paralogue 6).

The Grimleal... love Grima. Even Validar loves Grima. Aversa says he's everything she knows of love, but she also doesn't presume he loves HER, so of course it's his devotion to Grima that she sees. Notably, it's this form of love that makes her content to die for him.

So I end up feeling deeply moved, even though (or more accurately, BECAUSE) the entire philosophy behind the Grimleal is so horrific. The deep despair these people must feel in order to see salvation in the form of humanity's destruction... It's NOT just "hee hee powerful dragon will make me powerful" because these people, including Validar, do not presume that they are special and going to survive. Even the leader of the Grimleal is nothing. Grima alone is everything.

And... okay I talk a lot about the symbolism of Grima's name meaning mask, which I love so much, but lately I've also been thinking about the meaning of their Japanese name, Gimurei—from Norse, Gimlé, referring to the place where the righteous will dwell in happiness after Ragnarok, which will stand "even when both heaven and earth have passed away." So... yes, I do think that for the Grimleal, giving their souls to Grima is a way of becoming righteous. The world is cruel and ugly but Grima will make it right :::)

(Of course, because they believe Grima is the only answer, no one does anything to make the world they have any better. It's a self-fulfilling prophecy. One that Grima is drawn into as well. When this is what they wake up to, what are they supposed to do? If they don't destroy the world, they will be letting a LOT of people down.)

[fanfiction-artist-prototype]

Because I believe that Sceleritas Fel hates the chosen for all in some way contributing to his sweet master being diposed (Kethric for always planning to allow Orin to take their place, Gortash for the events that lead to the Prayer for Forgiveness and Orin for being the defective Bhallspawn that dared to try and murder his sweet master) I believe that there is so much opportunity for fuckery in ACT 2 at Moonrise Towers.

Like, I'm still on my first durge playthrough and I'm doing a redemption playthrough so I'm not sure what happens if you kill Isobel, however I think it's not a jump to say Fel wants durge to kill Isobel partly to get back at Kethric.

And I just think Sceleritas Fel telling the Dark Urge "BTW sweet master, you know this guy! Pretty well in fact! He helped cover up your attempted murder and was complicit," because I think it'd add interesting angst and dialogue choices, "so anyway moving on, do you want to know some stuff about him that when you see him again is going to make him shit himself?"

With BG3 being a role player game I understand that stuff like the party planning what they'll do how they'll attack and will they pretend or so forth happens 'off screen' and is more implied than anything since you control the companions whilst in combat. But also given the dialogue choices give approval and disapproval points I'm just saying sometimes the durge/tav deviates from what they're SUPPOSED to be saying and I think that added onto my idea of Sceleritas Fel telling the Dark Urge about Thorm adds brilliant opportunity for something like this:

Party enters the tower -> Durge greets ppl like they're new but enters the kitchens for the Gnolls bc Fel mentioned them -> ppl/Gnolls in the kitchen think Durge is back. They do not correct this. The whole Party is confused. -> enters throne room. Goblin cutscene plays out.

"Why don't we let our new friend decide?" Says Kethric.

Only for the most devious, most 'oh there are far too many teeth in that maw, but more teeth makes it easier to kill doesn't it?' Smile to crack across their face and they look not dissimilar to the few times the party has seen the Dark Urge lose themselves in the throes of battle, when the amnesiac companion who (if we take this as a redemption durge) is repulsed by themselves after awakening, can't quite tell who or what they really are once they have blood beneath their nails. And the party go 'oh shit' bc has the center of the absolute taken hold of that urge? But wait... Kethric Thorm has lost his composure, if only for a second. That smile MEANS SOMETHING to the man.

And so the Dark Urge continues, "New friend? Old Bones changes his friends as often as his goddesses'."

(Gonna be honest, Old Bones as a nockname comes from no Saint without audience on AO3, by Ikarons who's portrayal of the Dark Urge kind of rewrite my brain abt pre tadpole Dark Urge and durge in general)

And it shakes Kethric. Because the Bhallspawn speaks like they KNOW him, but they shouldn't... and yet they were the first True Soul, the first independent and a master of the Elderbrain so perhaps even she has her favourites. The Bhallspawn seems to always be a favourite child. And if the Bhallspawn knows him, has collected true soul allies who knows what their plans on? Perhaps it would be best to let this play out; to not alert Gortash (who may foil the plan, who may make the Bhallspawn falter yet again) and Orin (who he would not be opposed to watching be ripped apart by her kin.) just yet.

Perhaps it would be fair to see what the favourite child of Bhall is like now that they seemingly have kept companions alive and loyal without them baring thr crazed marks of Bhalls butchers?

"Of course, how could I forget the butcher? Now, friend, your decision?"

(Meanwhile the party is in utter disarray bc wtf is happening. Which at the next long rest/trio back to camp could trigger a scene where you reveal the existence of Sceleritas Fel and that he has revealed some information about Kethric but only that which you knew BEFORE, refusing to allaborate on how you knew then.

[stobinesque]

shockingly i have an Actual Question for Jeff is Steve's Bi Awakening AU - how does Jeff feel about being the bi awakening, especially since this has happened with multiple different people now?

Also, on the off chance you've already talked about this and I've missed it, I will happily hear about Stobin Soulmate AU instead because I am SO NOT NORMAL about soulmate AUs :D (or you could always say something about both....... yknow if you want....... please i don't want to sound pushy but also i am so interested in both of these concepts)

you are not being pushy at all!! I am happy to answer both

Jeff:

I think Jeff is mostly baffled?? 😅 Gareth comes out to him and tells him he has a crush and he's just sort of flattered and confused? But also he knows how scary it must be for his friend to come out so he's mostly just doing that awkward straight ally friend of trying to figure out how to be supportive without being overbearing or putting his foot in it. (He's a teenage boy in the 80s, though, so he Definitely Does--it's alright though, it works out.) I don't think he'll necessarily know that he's Lucas and potentially Patrick's bi awakenings. I think with Lucas they mostly bond over being nerdy black boys in rural Indiana, and the sexuality aspect of it kinda takes a backseat.

Except then Steve tells him about his crush and Jeff is like what??? is happening??? Again???? But he and Steve become bros and then it just kinda becomes funny. [Eddie re-comes out to him as bi after flirting with Chrissy and for a split second Jeff is like AGAIN??? before realizing that 1. that makes no sense and 2. he already knew Eddie was into guys]

Stobin Soulmate AU:

I have definitely posted snippets before, but I don't think I've really talked about it yet! The soulmate premise is that you feel your soulmates emotions and injuries throughout your life, and then when you "bond" with your soulmate you're able to share their thoughts. The bonding moment is one of intense emotional trust and connection--i.e. the bathroom scene, for Stobin.

I love soulmate AUs, but I also sometimes struggle with them when they still take place in a world that has homophobia. Because like...if everyone acknowledges that soulmates are an Actual Natural Thing why the fuck is homophobia still around?? So this one is also gonna kinda be a deconstruction of the trope, in which soulmates are actually kind of rare, and carry a kind of stigma with them (people with soulmates are essentially viewed as being "broken" and "incomplete"). Robin also knows she's queer, so she spends most of the fic assuming her soulmate is a girl.

Also due to the nature of the soulmate premise a lot of the early bits of the fic explore how confusing it is to not really be able to reliably pick apart your own emotions from someone else's.

The fic is from Robin's POV fic and will start with baby!Robin, and run through the events of 4. For seasons 1 and 2 she remains an outsider to the Upside Down plot, but keeps feeling herself drawn to Steve Harrington for Some Reason (she convinces herself she's actually being drawn to Nancy for a bit). Also every time her soulmate gets injured Steve comes back to school with a black eye? Weird. Also what the fuck is going on between Steve, Nancy and Jonathan? (This fic somehow developed background Stoncy when I wasn't looking.)

By the time Season 3 rolls around Robin is just Fully In Denial about Steve being her soulmate, because it just doesn't make any sense. Sure is weird that her soulmate seems to be having a pretty emotionally identical summer to her, though! What a coincidence!

This fic is currently sitting in a metaphorical drawer to stew because it is very messy and I've got a lot of other WIPs going on, but it does live really close to my heart so I am definitely planning to come back to it.

also tagging @blueskiesandstarrynights bc this soulmate AU is also my (eventual) stobin mindmeld fic!

[thechaoscryptid]

Fic authors self rec! When you get this, reply with your favorite five fics that you've written, then pass on to at least five other writers. spread the self-love ❤

Thanks for thinking of me, nonnie 🥰 This was actually a lot harder than I thought it was going to be, picking 5?? It was a good excercise in remembering I actually do like a lot of my past catalogue lmfao

The summaries got kinda long and I also wanted to do a little commentary on each so I'm gonna put the full post under a cut but the short list is:

Singularity (Shigadabi)

i've looked for love in every stranger (to get to you) (Sylvix)

Hello, My Name Is Human (Odazai)

Divinity (Matchablossom)

Blur (Sheith)

Singularity | ShigaDabi | General

Alpha Arietis dies in a brilliant storm, spraying billions of years’ worth of accumulated gas and matter through the cosmos as it collapses in on itself. Great fingers of dust reach toward the endless abyss, and cradled in the palm of the cooling nebula, a godling sleeps. His heart is white-hot and aching, all the pain of his progenitor’s end pulsing through him as he curls in on himself. The gazes of the other gods weigh heavily on him as the universe swims into focus. Their whispers ripple across galaxies to wash over his still-tender form, awakening in him an anger that beams into the darkness as his eyes open, twin crimson spheres cutting through the endless night.

This was such a fun style experiment!! I wrote it for a zine and it was by far the shortest fic bc I decided to go with the dialogue-less option; it felt better suited to the space vibe.

I looked up so many astronomy facts for this too, which was fun bc I'm a bit of a space bitch (even though I probably fucked it all up for the ~narrative~ lmao). Did you know! Beta Capricorni, one of the stars in Capricorn (Dabi's sign and mine - we share a birthday, and it is my favorite BNHA factoid), is commonly known as Dabih, derived from an Arabic legend saying Beta Capricorni and Alpha Capricorni, aka Algedi, were "the lucky stars of a slaughterer."

I really really want to dive further into the concept of gods being birthed from dying stars at some point - there's so much I didn't get to in this fic just bc of limits and themes and such, but I think it's fucking cool even if it's not popular.

i've looked for love in every stranger (to get to you) | Sylvix | Explicit

“Yeah. Listen, Fe, I’m sor—” “Don’t,” Felix says. When Sylvain opens his mouth to protest, Felix cuts him off. “Seriously, don’t. I don’t want your apologies.” Sylvain arches a brow. “I just want you—” (And oh, those words on their own are nearly enough to unwind that barbed wire, but somehow it hurts worse knowing it’s not what Felix really means.) “—to be better.” Felix takes a deep breath, turns to the kitchen counter, and fiddles for a second too long with the tabs on the pizza boxes. “I hate watching you hurt yourself.”

Man, where do I start with this one. I picked at this fic for over a year and a half before deciding to finish it for a bang, and I'm so happy about how it turned out. One theme that shows up a lot in my writing is "love is an action and a choice," and I think this fic showcases that beautifully.

Sylvain's so fucked up here and I love him so much. This timestamp from the middle of a breakdown and subsequent guilt about said breakdown just...really hits home. And Felix being there - CHOOSING to remain there - through that one and all previous ones? clenches fist They're in love, your honor.

I just think it's important to show that being kind of a shitty person doesn't preclude you from being loved, nor should it.

Hello, My Name Is Human | Odazai | Mature

“No need for sorry,” Oda says, the words automatic. “That’s not your place.” It’s the wrong thing to say, comes out nothing like he’d intended. Dazai flinches as though he’s been shot, curling up into himself and away from Oda before scrambling to his feet. There’s no easy grace in his movements today, only a quick, jerky retreat before Oda comes to his senses and darts after him. He wraps a hand around Dazai’s forearm to tug him back, and there’s nothing but rawness in Dazai’s eye when he turns around. “Let me go,” he says icily. “It’s not your place.”  “Dazai.” “Fuck off,” Dazai mutters, shrugging Oda’s hand away. “I’ll go die alone, then. In my place.” “Hey,” Oda says, soft as anything as Dazai’s turned half away. He holds his palms out, the same way he would for a stray or lost child. Dazai takes a shuddering breath. “I’m sorry,” he continues. “Your place-” “An executive doesn’t have a place,” Dazai says. “A weapon doesn’t need one.”

This was the spiritual precursor to in the morning i'll be with you, and upon rereading, I realized I wrote pretty much the same fic twice 😅 There's just something that hits EVERY time about softness in the face of bluntness about doing and wanting terrible things. I chose this one instead of in the morning because of one of the places the two fics diverge, actually.

In this fic, Oda actually says "I love you" to Dazai and Dazai does not take it well, and it feels important to me that not every I love you is received with an equally passionate "omg I love you too." But like I said for the Sylvix above, it's also important that it's expressed, even if it hurts or isn't received or reciprocated.

Divinity | MatchaBlossom | Explicit

“I don’t need anyone,” Kaoru whispers. He’s always been good at making bad decisions when it comes to Kojiro; this is another in a long line of failures and he’s not willing to admit yet that maybe Adam fucked him up past the point of no return. “It’s fine,” he mumbles when he hears Kojiro shifting. He’s too afraid to watch him walk away. “You can just go.” And instead of leaving, Kojiro shuffles forward and hugs him. Kaoru is surrounded by impossibly gentle arms and the scent of pine, and though he’s used to the latter, he hasn’t been touched like this in a long, long time. “I’m not going to go,” Kojiro says softly. His face is buried in Kaoru’s shoulder, lips warm where they brush across his skin. “I’d say sorry, but I’m not, Kaoru. I don’t want to.”

God this fic actually kickstarted my writing motor after being really burnt out and plateaued on skill for a while. While it's not my most technically skilled fic (I don't think any on this list are, tbh?), it was fun to write and it's still fun to read.

I loved being able to take a softer turn with Kaoru's anxiety as opposed to some of the harder mental health issues I'm used to expressing in my writing. And Matchablossom were really just out there on screen being Like That at all moments, huh? Their dynamic is just such a joy to play with, whether it's softer like this or harder like some of my other SK8 fics.

Blur | Sheith | Mature

“Everything I’ve done, everything I’ve made of myself, and it still isn’t enough. You know they always said shoot for the stars? I didn’t just shoot, Shiro, I helped save those stars. Where is there to go from there? There’s no coming back down to Earth after you’ve seen realities collapse around you. There’s no normal.” “It doesn’t need to be normal,” Shiro says. “I WANT normal!” Keith’s chest heaves, throat raw with the force of his insistence as his truth is birthed into the world. Twenty-five years’ worth of longing shake themselves loose from inside him and when they bleed out, so does his energy. He sinks to his knees, shaking as he repeats the words again and again. “I want normal. I want to be normal, Shiro, why can’t I be normal?”

This fic is just 9k of me bleeding my truth onto the screen, I'll be real (it should also be stated my self-destructive behaviors aren't physically harmful, that's artistic license). It hurt to write and it hurts to reread bc not much has changed in the years since I wrote it, but it's good, and I stand by the rawness of the narration. Dealing with a personality disorder and suicidal ideation (especially unmedicated and without therapy - bitches be rawdogging reality and I'm bitches) fucking blows. It's exhausting, and it makes you feel inhuman.

This scene especially knocked a few realizations loose for me, bc I don't remember writing it; my head just shut off, and then I looked at the page and went "ah. Oh dear. This feels like something I need to unpack, huh." And here we are, several years later, still unpacking lmao

[warlordfelwinter]

For Juno: the second dream & the sacrifice, and for Narin: once awake & erra

[warframe oc asks]

Juno

The Second Dream: How did they react to awakening from the Second Dream? Did they remember that they were themselves, or did they think that they were their warframe?

They were very alarmed and distressed to wake up to say the least. They absolutely thought they were their warframe (specifically Nezha (prime) bc my hc is that the operators have Their Frame (at least until they get Umbra) since the warframes were individuals it seems weird to me if multiple tenno are collecting them like pokemon (the blueprints and foundry pieces are not canon to me sjk;lgn i like it more if they're unique to each tenno even if that's not the case)) and hardly remember anything from before. So it was extremely disorienting to suddenly be seeing what they thought was Their Body from the outside. For a while, even after the war within, they were very like... dissociated from their own body and didn't like exiting the warframe at all because it just felt Wrong. They're settled in themself now and are outside of their frame quite a bit.

The Sacrifice: What does family mean to your character? Do they have a family- biological or otherwise?

Family to Juno means those who take care of each other and are there for each other. They have no biological family, their parents were killed on the Zariman (not by them, they didn't participate in that) and they had no siblings. They'd consider Ordis family. Lotus was there but she's on. extremely thin ice with them right now. All their various pets are family. Nezha is family. Teshin is family, honestly.

Narin

Once Awake: What are your character's thoughts on the Infestation? Have they ever seen it in-person before?

He has seen it, because Juno has a helminth charger that they bring around sometimes. He's interested in it in the same way that I'm interested in parasites and such. Like a morbid fascination but he'd prefer if it stayed over there away from him thank you very much. Except Juno's charger. Barkspawn gets tummy rubs. I don't think Juno's told him the warframes are technically infected

Erra: Have they ever seen a Sentient before? How did they react?

He's seen an eidolon, which I think are sentients iirc. Didn't get close, obviously, but you know he's a kid so there's definitely been at least once that he snuck out at night and watched one from a distance. I think he finds them kind of sad, just by the noises they make.

[brokenhardies]

some fun luna and the doctor facts!

when luna first met five (the visitation) she fainted in front of them due to it being her first time being shunted around the timeline

she quickly realises that this means that eleven knew she was going to pass out and didnt say anything... which means every incarnation from five onwards knows that she passed out in front of them

she's most worried about meeting six, he's going to have the most creative flowery insults for her about that

speaking of five - luna had a crush on them when she was a kid due to thinking that they were a woman

when she found out that they weren't a woman (thanks to the 'sexual awakening' scene from black orchid) she was a bit embarrassed

instead of the six & peri comment she accidentally drops this when under the truth field in time of the doctor meaning that eleven, twelve and thirteen all know this (so do fourteen & fifteen but im waiting to write those two later down the track lol)

all of the doctors know that luna is a lesbian. she hasnt come out to any of them. maybe she's made it obvious? she doesn't know

she does get to meet sappho with the first doctor and he kind of went "...oh that explains a lot"

speaking of one - luna gets along best with susan, vicki and dodo. they all try to get into trouble together

luna always ends up stealing the doctor's clothes - she's walked around in the original four scarf (not the second one because someone ripped it up), as well as seven's sweater vest, eight's original coat and nine's leather jacket

luna isn't sure if the reason eight, war and nine all wear leather jackets is because of her or because of ace. or because of none of those things

the doctor has met the seeker and insulted it. several times. they dont tell luna that theyve done that 'cause they dont want to put luna in danger, but they will call the seeker "a pathetic egocentric moron with delusions of grandeur and hypocricy"

yes thats a six insult - he definetly called the seeker that

luna frequently wonders if the doctor is aware that their life is a tv show because of how little they care about the fourth wall

she also wonders who plays certain roles that the doctor's actors have played if they look exactly like those characters, or if those shows just... dont exist

which is a shame bc she loves good omens... then she finds the book in the tardis library and immediately loses her goddamn mind

theres a thick of it joke i can make here but my brain is blanking on it

[cxdemistake]

| Hi friends—

So under the cut here, I have an idea for a possible comic/fic I want to make. It’s regarding JJBA, specifically part 3 bc you know I love my boy Jotaro. It’s very long so that’s why it’s under a cut! It’s not fully fleshed out yet, so please forgive any vagueness or possible inconsistencies!

Also if you’re here from Discord hi I love you— |

My idea begins when DIO awakens. If I’m looking at the timeline right, it was around when Jotaro was 12. He started having very vivid dreams, most of them random but normal, besides being extremely vivid, and he could never control them. But when DIO began converting people to his cause like in Part 1— killing, making others into vampires/zombies, etc.— the dreams became nightmares. He stopped wanting to sleep, because he didn’t want to witness the horror anymore. He tried to tell Holly, but she couldn’t understand how he was having dreams this horrific and thought maybe he was being influenced at school. She listened, of course, but she didn’t know how to handle this situation on her own.

Holly took Jotaro to multiple doctors, and they told her they couldn’t figure out why he didn’t want to sleep, because he was otherwise healthy. Jotaro started becoming more irritable and hard to manage, but Holly didn’t want to push him by being too naggy, so that was why she was always so complacent with him.

(Note: As for why she didn’t contact the SPF or Joseph, I’m thinking his hatred of all things Japanese was part of her reasoning for not wanting to talk to him until after Jotaro went to jail— she thought it was more trouble than it was worth and that maybe it would be fine if she could figure out what was wrong.)

The twist here is that the dreams weren’t really dreams. I don’t think DIO needs to sleep as a vampire (at least not that much?) so what Jotaro was seeing was either memories (if DIO did sleep) or he was seeing exactly what DIO was doing as he was doing it, as a further connection to DIO having Jonathan’s body and using it for his own purposes.

He didn’t know anything about Stands until his own manifested, but I imagine he saw when DIO manifested The World and was confused, even though he still thought it was a dream. But when Star Platinum appeared, he just assumed that this was some kind of karmic punishment and didn’t want to risk hurting anyone else after how he’d beaten the group of men up— so that was why he didn’t want to leave the jail.

I haven’t gotten into how this would work further into the story except for a few small things. First, he’d vaguely recognize Avdol, as he would’ve seen him running from DIO in his dream, but the outcome of their fight remains the same— there’s a little more hesitance on Jotaro’s part to hurt Avdol, but he still chokes him and breaks out of the cell to get to him.

Second, when Joseph shows off his own Stand and shows the picture to Jotaro, it triggers something in him. He almost brings out Star Platinum to destroy the image, but he doesn’t since they’re in a public place. It takes a lot of prompting and pleading from Holly, but eventually he spits it out.

“I know it’s hard to believe, but… this man is the one I keep seeing in my dreams. He’s done so many despicable things. I’ve seen everything he’s done. He’s why I can’t sleep, why I don’t want to.”

It’s a very serious moment, but it still doesn’t stop Joseph from yelling that he can’t believe he’s spent so much money to break cameras when he could’ve just asked his own grandson to go to sleep for a bit.

It becomes a running gag at some points, too. “Jotaro, you need to sleep.”

“I’m not tired, leave me alone, old man.”

“We need to know DIO’s next move, dammit, now shut your eyes already!”

Of course the journey is still long and full of shenanigans, bc why wouldn’t it be? Eventually, though, like with Hermit Purple, DIO catches on. He starts doing things to deliberately torment Jotaro’s mind, taunts him about his mother, says he’ll take great pleasure in killing the Crusaders, and it becomes even harder for him to sleep. It takes more out of him every day, but the other Crusaders insist he needs to sleep, and they take turns watching him when he finally collapses to be sure to wake him if he gets too restless.

Anything further beyond this I’d need to develop more, but I like the idea so far.

A bonus twist for the end (completely optional): DIO could also see what Jotaro saw and kept it to himself until the final battle, meaning he knew all of their steps in advance and was just as confident he’d win as he was in canon… only for Jotaro to absolutely destroy him.

As another bonus, I can imagine when they’re fighting Death 13 that he’s unfazed and he’s just like “I’ve had worse nightmares than this.” and the other Crusaders become even more concerned.

[agueforts]

🌻

i was procrastinating on these because i wasn't thinking about anything interesting and THEN i remembered that it was anything i want. so i am sitting my brain down and going through its files

(this worked phenomenally well and got SO long i am putting it under a readmore for a reason. one of my friends introduced the phrase "encyclopedia autism" into my lexicon and truly every time i start talking at length i remember it for a second and just nod sagely. it really is like that. paragraphs breaks were added in post please know this is even more of a wall of text in spirit)

DID U KNOW. viperfish fangs r so proportionally long compared to their body that if they misaligned their jaw when closing they could puncture their own brains. did u know gulper eels look so fuckweird. i think deep sea fish r SO fascinating. the way they get smoothslimy instead of scales n the ways they adapt to an environment where other creatures r scarce and actively hunting is deeply inefficient energy usage n all the adaptations n stuff

stoplight loosejaws r particularly fun also because 1. what the fuck is up witj that mouth. how does it work. i WISH i could see that in motion i need to know how it fits togetherrr. and 2. RED LIGHT BIOLUMINESCENCE!!! such a beautiful adaptation it's SO cool i think people kinda get caught in the horror of something can see you but you cannot see it (bc of course red light gets absorbed the fastest so a lot of deep sea creatures can't see it) but also i am just SO fascinated by different kinds of vision

like not even just stuff like ultraviolet vision n tetrachromacy n whatever is up with mantis shrimps (which i also am so fascinated by for the visual processing efficiency reasons) but also like different animals different environments different needs and stuff like how differentiation of red and green means knowing when fruits r ripe and like what makes speed of response or acuity or specific points n areas of the light spectrum advantageous in different animals and ohhhhhh. the world is so so fascinating did u know this

i knowww why shrimp colors get memed the way they do and i don't dislike it or anything but also i don't super get why ppl r not further interested in the phenomenon. like is it not SO fascinating that they do the brunt of their color processing in the eye rather than in the brain. and of course it's quicker n thus better suited for a creature that doesn't rely on being smart and i think there's stuff abt like which specific points on the light spectrum r highlighted and what that means abt the differences in environment they see but also it's so so cool as a CONCEPT does that not grip ur chest in a vice with excitement and eagerness to learn n devour. the world is so beautiful there are so many things to learn and understand and they're all so complex and so intricate and so COOL there's hidden depths to anything and everything you can think of

i was at a waterpark a couple weeks ago and lying down in the sun and i just spent a while closing my eyes and then opening them and watching the world fade from blue to normal vision bc afterimages n cwll cone fatigue r so so interesting for a mundane phenomenon i am sure most ppl do not think about. opponent processes theory ur so cool i love u

have u heard about the oklch color system i cannot say that i understand a lot of the specifics of any of what i am saying because i am simply a very enthusiastic layperson but it's so neat all the flaws of hsl/hsv it addresses .......... color things in general r so fascinating i wish i understand the specifics of it better. how light works n thw world and how the eye & brain process it and all the little details of how digital color works n stuff..... one of these days i will start learning abt principles of painting and the intricacies of the medium and awaken a ravenous hunger inside of me i know it

OMG I FORGOT TO SAYYYY THE PREVALENCE OF BIOLUMINESCENCE IN DEEP SEA ENVIRONMENTS AND COUNTERILLUMIATION WORKING FOR THE SAME REASON COUNTERSHADING WORKS!!!!!!!!! ISN'T THAT SO NEAT!!

oughghfng. i love information. hi

edit: more stuff i forgot to mention. there's a deep sea fish with a distendable stomach so they can digest things for months and sometimes the things they've eaten start to rot in there and produce gas and bring them closer to the surface and then they r easier to catch. there's a fish (grideye.... something. i'll look it up) that has UPWARD-FACING PLATES OF PHOTOSENSITIVE BONE instead of eyes. also hands u metazooa!!!! like wordle for taxonomy. my beloved

[jessiescock]

lion king franchise media only works if the lions are sexy. the cg realism takes were always destined to be dogshit bc they don’t seem to understand this core principle. Allow me to illustrate my point:

now the first movie is obviously very good, the lions are very sexy. so many characters who inspired a sexual or romantic awakening for their hordes of devoted fans. phenomenal movie, not exactly a hot take i know.

now the second movie tho, many ppl really like it even tho it is pretty bland and forgettable on its own, and very bad in its function as a sequel. that doesn’t matter tho because everyone wants to fuck Kovu. Everyone loves this awful movie bc they’re so got dam horny for the edgy hot topic emo lion. I would even argue that horny kovu fans are this movie’s most notable long-term impact on pop culture. So while it’s not a particularly outstanding film, it’s reasonably popular in its own right, fondly remembered by many, and did manage to have at least some kind of lasting cultural impact. all thanks to the sexy lion.

There isn’t really much to say about the third movie. it’s not even 80 minutes long, most people probably don’t even know it exists. I would say that it’s stupid and unnecessary and that no one asked for a Timon and Pumbaa backstory, but the scenes about them parenting Simba are actually really cute and funny and heartwarming and i’m glad that we have those. Once again, the sexy lion (im talking about adult simba here!!!) saves the otherwise pretty unremarkable movie from irrelevance and disdain. We’re starting to see a pattern emerge here.

Ok what else is there. There’s the Timon and Pumbaa TV show from the 90s. I gotta admit i didn’t really watch much of that, but i’ve been told that it’s funny. I also know they have Simba show up sometimes. Put a pin in that.

Ofc i can’t not mention the absolutely phenomenal live action version that offers a refreshing new take on a beloved classic: the stage musical. absolutely phenomenal both as a piece of theatre and as an adaption no notes. Ofc the lion characters in this one are also very sexy. With these last two examples tho it’s starting to look like the sexy lions are not necessarily the sole reason for lion king media to be good, but there’s definitely a connection here.

I didn’t watch Lion Guard because it’s a show for babies, but i know several kids who really like the show and it seems to be successful enough. Here again we have Simba being present as a character, and while I don’t have any hard evidence on this one I’m willing to bet that there’s a substantial amount of kids who have/had a crush on Kion. So I’ll say this one also fits into my theory here.

The stupid fucking 2019 CG remake exists purely as an afterthought to the original 1994 movie and has zero redeeming qualities. All the characters including the lions look absolutely awful. They don’t even look that realistic, like have you ever seen a real lion? they look a million times cooler than those awful soulless beasts. Understandably enough I have not seen anyone being even remotely horny for those vile creatures. And that’s quite a remarkable feat considering they got fuckin Beyoncé and Donald Glover as Nala and Simba. I think if they’d just used footage of real lions and let them do a voiceover over that, there would have been some freaks who get off on that. Maybe there’s someone out there who wants to fuck CG Simba, but as someone who seeks out a lot of lion king content and spent way too much time hatereading reactions to the 2019 movie, i have thankfully never encountered them. This awful awful movie may have brought in a lot of money to its greedy corporate overlords, but it has had zero cultural impact. Sure when it was announced and eventually released everyone had a lot to say about it (mostly about how much it fucking sucked) but as soon as the novelty wore off everyone just forgot about it. I have watched this movie and there’s not a single scene from it that i can even remotely clearly recall. There were some memes about how awful it all looked when it was new but those all quickly went away again. I don’t think there’s anyone who enjoys this movie without at least some kind of connection to the original. Yea it made a lot of money and stirred up some controversy but now 5 years later no one gives a shit about it anymore. and there’s no sexy lions anywhere to be found.

[porcelain-giyuu]

yayyy i am so glad this blog is still alive lol.

RIP to the OMC au outline you will be missed 🪦

Here’s my thoughts, idk how to organize this so prepare for word vomit:

For the nesting au

I think this is especially interesting if tsutako were engaged as in canon. giyuu would probably dread tsutako getting married bc of the likelihood of her having pups. would he be afraid of being replaced/forgotten about? would he be jealous of her fiancé and their future pups??

I think an interesting fic idea is mb giyuu stressing out about this and having a breakdown in which he admits to tsutako about this and how he views her, and how upset he gets when she calls him a “practice pup.” how would tsutako react??

idk this.., I just love this hc.

would tsutako think of Giyuu as her son too? Idk what their age gap is, but if she’s the only one who remembers their parents, she might think of him as her own pup but feels that by taking on that role that she is then erasing their parents memories or overstepping or w/e.

also, I just need to know how the hashira react to Giyuu and mui imprinting on each other lol. Like, their whole perspective of this dude they’ve been working w for years changes when they see him suddenly taking on a parental role.

Giyuus instincts awakening is gonna be like a second puberty for him, I see the potential for a lot of awkward moments lol. he’s definitely gonna need help from the other hashira.

as for the uzugang/giyuu fivesome:

i think the uzui fam and giyuus’ personalities contrast really well, I think he’d kinda be like a blunter, quieter, more tone deaf hinatsuru, he just calms everyone down, a say it how it is kind of guy yk. And Giyuu could really benefit from their company, like when uzui finds out that giyuus really not a bad guy, he’d probably help him open up more to the other hashira (in his own flamboyant, uzui way of course.) Suma, Hina, and Makio would be so patient w him, they would not find his quietness/ off putting, I think it would be really wholesome. The uzui quartet would appreciate him for his honesty and his selflessness.

I need to see how the uzui foursome falls in love w him. like whatd this guy do to warrant being called the crazy little fuck? howd he manage to impress them all so much lol I need to know. Them flirting w him and he just doesn’t know how to respond, or the hashira seeing a relationship develop btwn people who are on completely opposite sides of the personality spectrum

Something that also makes this really interesting is that before becoming demon slayers the uzui pack believed that the mission was more valuable than their own lives. Uzui makes it his mission to make sure his wives value their lives and live w/o guilt. How would they react when they see a reflection of their past selves in Giyuu?

this was a lot you don’t have to respond to all of it, or any of it you could word vomit and id eat it right up. your aus just got me thinking lol, it’s why I kept my request so broad ;)))

please never apologize for word vomit!!! i love your ideas and your interaction means the world to me. genuinely got me giggling and kicking my feet. anon i might just have to fall in love with you/j 

also sorry for the massive long post i’m about to drop on you 

CW; mentions of canonical character death, dismissal of ones own life, maybe some minor illusions to violence

For the nesting au

      I think this is especially interesting if tsutako were engaged as in canon. giyuu would probably dread tsutako getting married bc of the likelihood of her having pups. would he be afraid of being replaced/forgotten about? would he be jealous of her fiancé and their future pups??

i think about tsutako and her fiancé a lot. over all of my aus, i use the same family and fiancé because i got attached to them in OMC. in there they had a positive relationship, but here not so much. giyuu is apprehensive and abnormally cold to them all, especially tsutakos fiancé kohei (full name nagai kohei- he’s great!) who attempts to form a positive relationship with giyuu.

he resents the nagai family just as must as he is glad for their fondness of tsutako. she’s loved and treasured properly; giyuu just can’t reconcile with the idea that she might not want him in her future life. 

he’s under the impression that he will take up too much of her biological pups space in the future and assumes she thinks so too. this reflects poorly in his attitude towards the marriage, kohei, the nagai family and even tsutako. 

he doesn’t really have the heart to be truly jealous of her future pups; he loves his sister too much to honestly think badly about her happiness. 

       I think an interesting fic idea is mb giyuu stressing out about this and having a breakdown in which he admits to tsutako about this and how he views her, and how upset he gets when she calls him a “practice pup.” how would tsutako react?? would tsutako think of Giyuu as her son too? Idk what their age gap is, but if she’s the only one who remembers their parents, she might think of him as her own pup but feels that by taking on that role that she is then erasing their parents memories or overstepping or w/e.

this is actually something i’ve already got planned!! tsutako does remember their parents, as she was 14 when they died. it hit her really hard, because her mother was pregnant and her father was their pack alpha. she was just starting to have mock heats/deeper instincts so she was very lost the first few years. having her little brother helped, because small children act as a sort of pseudo-beta until their dynamics develop. 

she views him kind of as her son, yeah. but she feels a lot of guilt over it as she knows giyuu doesn’t actually remember their parents very well- she thinks she’s taken too much space in giyuus life as a “fake parent”. she and giyuu mirror each other in that way. she was also vaguely resentful towards her parents for leaving her to raise a child AS a child, but it was another faucet of her overwhelming grief. 

she would be wrecked. she loves giyuu dearly and thought she was doing him a kindness for not pushing her own feelings on him, but to find out he thought of her the same way and was hurt by her casual dismissals hurts her in turn. she still feels guilt about taking their parents place in his life but she now eases into it a little more. 

also, I just need to know how the hashira react to Giyuu and mui imprinting on each other lol. Like, their whole perspective of this dude they’ve been working w for years changes when they see him suddenly taking on a parental role. 

   Giyuus instincts awakening is gonna be like a second puberty for him, I see the potential for a lot of awkward moments lol. he’s definitely gonna need help from the other hashira.

oh the hashira have such varying personalities and views of both giyuu and mui it’s hilarious. 

shinobu (a fairly mid-range alpha) was the first to know- she was leading the team of kakushi to their location when muis crow finally came in after the blizzard and suitably freaked out a bit. she was kind of angry about it being a fully recognized imprint, which means giyuu imprinted back and now he’s got a son apparently. during their recovery there’s a lot of her trying to keep tanjiro the FUCK OUT. because him bringing around all these children will definitely fuck with giyuu more. 

tanjiro is under the impression of “more people to support you and love you while you recover is always the best option” but doesn’t realize that he’s kind of opening pandora’s box. 

the other hashira have varying reactions. gyomei (another omega who has experience with taking care of multiple children) feels deeply for giyuu and thinks that though odd, they make a good pair and will suit each others needs. he’s definitely glad and amused by the pups giyuu collects (who actually kind of collect him), starting with mui and going farther. 

mitsuri (an energetic omega) thinks it’s the cutest most wonderful thing she’s ever seen. she finds out from rengoku (who survives in this au and becomes the kamabokos teacher!!) who learned from the kids. she only saw giyuu and mui in recovery once while going to visit shinobu, but they were so adorable silently drinking tea and watching clouds in the gardens!!

sanemi (beta) and obanai (beta) have similar but still varied reactions. obanai has an overwhelming sense of dread whenever he sees giyuu, followed by an odd sort of jealousy. how did this self-righteous, boring egotistical egg of a man become a better parent then the ones he was born to? obanai doesn’t like it. 

sanemi hates giyuu. it doesn’t help that tanjiro has been basically kidnapping genya to take to giyuu, resulting in the hilarious view of this huge newly-presenting omega begrudgingly following around his pseudo-dam. who babys him and is harsh with him in equal measure. overall sanemi is unnerved and unsettled by it. 

rengoku (one of the four alpha pillars) thinks it’s enthralling. he’s glad that these wayward children have someone reliable to look to, even if it isn’t always him! it helps he’s got a little bit of a crush on giyuu- but he’s definitely not letting him anywhere near senjuro. he heard about giyuu claiming that kanao girl as one of his pups (right under shinobus nose!) and would rather not go through that. 

uzui (alpha) thinks it’s fucking hilarious, and the dramatics definitely increase giyuus flamboyancy in his eyes. 

as for the  uzugang/giyuu fivesome:

i think the uzui fam and giyuus’ personalities contrast really well, I think he’d kinda be like a blunter, quieter, more tone deaf hinatsuru, he just calms everyone down, a say it how it is kind of guy yk. And Giyuu could really benefit from their company, like when uzui finds out that giyuus really not a bad guy, he’d probably help him open up more to the other hashira (in his own flamboyant, uzui way of course.) Suma, Hina, and Makio would be so patient w him, they would not find his quietness/ off putting, I think it would be really wholesome. The uzui quartet would appreciate him for his honesty and his selflessness.

I need to see how the uzui foursome falls in love w him. like whatd this guy do to warrant being called the crazy little fuck? howd he manage to impress them all so much lol I need to know. Them flirting w him and he just doesn’t know how to respond, or the hashira seeing a relationship develop btwn people who are on completely opposite sides of the personality spectrum 

oh the uzui fam at first just thinks he’s interesting. a puzzle, who reflects old views they had about their own lives and needs to be solved. but after spending a lot of time with him, learning the ways to get him to engage himself, learning anything they can and watching him exist so quietly- when they know he could be louder, bolder- they become invested. 

they fall in love with him for lots of different reasons. different times and scenarios- their first inklings that each of them loves him are completely separate. 

hinatsuru catches him on the edges of the estate, walking in tight circles and looking longingly at their home- he wasn’t invited today. he came… to them. he made the effort to see them. she laughs, and takes his arm, walking towards the orchard instead of the house. in the warm sun, broken often by clouds, hinatsuru wants giyuu to make an effort always. she wants to give the effort back, too. she wants giyuu with them, and it doesn’t matter what that looks like. 

makio realized she was in love with him without him there. she was at a market, buying gifts for her wives and husband (as she does often, she loves them and they deserve nice things) and she found herself with an extra little thing at each stand she visited. at the end of the day, before returning home, she lays out the extra things she bought to figure them out. 

a blue tourmaline hairpin-which would look nice on suma but wouldn’t quite match her- some sturdy gloves in a size that wouldn’t fit any of them, and a small book on weather patterns. there’s only one person who’s ever mentioned interest in weather, and when she thinks about the pin in thick black hair it matches perfectly. she doesn’t know when she memorized the size of giyuus hands, but it’s just as well.

suma thinks she could fall in love with giyuu easily. he tempers them in a different way then hina, colder (but not sharply- always gentle and quiet) and less often. he seems unsure of himself around them but the moment there is something he perceives as Job or Mission, he becomes so oddly confident in everything. there is no hesitation. no room for error or slowness. 

she notices his accuracy. demons killed by pinpointing the softest part of their neck; the exact moment an opening is available giyuu is there. he recognizes the nanosecond they’re vulnerable because she thinks in some way he’s always vulnerable. he has no openings to them at first, treating them as Mission. as he becomes less sure of himself around them, she becomes more sure of his place. she falls in love with him easily, but not simply. 

tengen falls in love with him the moment he takes off his haori. it’s not due to him hating the thing or thinking it’s ugly- but a deeper understanding of it’s meaning and symbolism. giyuu told him where it came from after he asked. 

he talks about tsutako and sabito, how they shaped him. how their loss shaped him. how he keeps their memory both locked away and painted on his skin; that they’re his in a deep, sorrowful way. 

giyuu takes off the haori, and lets uzui hold it. it speaks of a monumental trust that uzui has never seen from him before: giyuu is very possessive of material gifts or things that hold sentimental value. he’s worn makios gloves and pin every day for months, only letting her touch them. 

it sparks a need to keep giyuu with them. something tengen has felt building over months finally ignites, adding to the pyre he considers his love towards his wives. he wants giyuu to trust him. he wants giyuu to keep him- not in the way he keeps tsutako and sabito, but in the way he rereads the book makio gave him over and over again. the way he sits with hina in the orchard- the way he sleeps on the engawa outside of their room even though he has his own. the way he and suma speak, fast vs slow, still somehow steady. 

   Something that also makes this really interesting is that before becoming demon slayers the uzui pack believed that the mission was more valuable than their own lives. Uzui makes it his mission to make sure his wives value their lives and live w/o guilt. How would they react when they see a reflection of their past selves in Giyuu?

when they get down to all of the nitty-gritty layers of giyuu, they react generally with grief and then determination. they refuse to let him carry it all- from what they know about his family and former friends they would be glad of him healing. 

giyuu values the mission heavily. he puts emphasis on not being the true water pillar: believing that he’s just a placeholder until someone competent comes along. but there is one catch: he refuses to die before someone worthy takes his place. 

the uzui fam see this as his final stand against his overwhelming survivors guilt, grief, and other personal issues. they’d be right, of course, but it doesn’t mean it’s not frustrating. getting giyuu to see the value of his life without its value coming from others is very hard