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#scared it won't be good enough for others
platypus-beans · 2 days
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Every day I find myself getting more and more pissed.
Whether you like it or not, either Kamala Harris or Donald Trump is going to win the election. The voting population not for either do not have enough to elect a third party, especially since none of yall can agree on which candidate you want.
None of the candidates are actually going to stop Isreal, some might say they will, but the president doesn't work alone and if the other branches don't want to do it, it won't get done.
All you are doing by refusing to vote blue because "both sides are bad!!!" for either candidate is putting America in jeopardy. Trump wants anyone not like him dead or bowing at his feet. He can say project 2025 isn't his until he's blue in the face, but everyone knows the truth.
Yes, it is *kamala's* campaign you are hurting. Trumpies are incredibly ride or die, to the point where they are still desperately spreading that "immigrants eating dogs and cats" shit because they can't accept their beautiful leader would lie to them.
The American public has fallen into this state where if the ideal isn't happening, they'll throw their hands in the air and won't do anything. It's like this with tipping culture mist evidently. The people aren't being payed properly and rely on tips, so in retaliation people refuse to tip.
You are not going to get the ideal situation by putting your loved ones in jeopardy by throwing your vote somewhere it doesn't matter.
Change happens slow and with plans, not with one stint. Your revolt is litterally a common statistic of the election which has only become more relevant because of cultish behavior on the right.
A woman of color being a viable candidate for the presidential election is fucking monumental and you're all treating it like its nothing and demanding more. You're not gonna get more in the next month and couple days. Let go of your damn pride because nothing good will happen for Palestine, or Congo, or Venezuela, or anyone else if you let Trump get in.
Is Kamala Harris perfect? No. Is she even great? Not at all. But her even getting this close to the oval office is progress.
But no. Throw away your vote. It's fine. I'm sure all the Palestinians will love you once Trump gets into power and gives Netanyahu the go ahead to kill them all with no mercy.
I'm done being fucking scared.
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kaanagen · 3 days
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KLOKLLEGE [ METALOCALYPSE AU]
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This is a college AU with Dethklok, written by someone in college as a form of escapism. Let me point out some of their main traits in this universe:
Skwisgaar Skwigelf
24 y/o
Music course
Guitar prodigy
Not that egocentric but already pretty smug and vain
Figuring himself out, but manages to charm a lot of girls with minimal effort
Lives on the college campus
Popular enough to make him worry about his image and what people think of him
Goes to a lot of parties
Works part-time at an antique store on the other side of town so people won't find him and see him as "lesser"
Toki Wartooth
20 y/o
Initially came to study Theology, then switched to Fine Arts but is considering changing to Music after meeting Skwisgaar
Christian but non-practicing
Lives on the college campus
Considered the "weird guy" after becoming friends with Murderface
Not many friends
Ran away from home and forged documents to get an internship to study in America
With no financial help from his parents, works part-time at an antique store and does various gigs around town, which is how he met Skwisgaar and Murderface
Plays guitar as a hobby and is quite good for being self-taught, which helps him land a few gigs
Develops a crush on Skwisgaar as they start working together, but has conflicted views about his sexuality due to his upbringing
Purposely ruins Skwisgaar's dates as they grow closer through their job
Pickles
26 y/o
Initially not in college, but Nathan convinces him to enroll in the Music course
Doesn't get his piercings until after he meets Nathan
Ran away from home and has been living in the back of his family's stolen car for nearly two years
Goes to parties for free food, booze and drugs
Met Nathan after cutting himself while high and drunk at a party—they’ve been friends ever since
Pro at shoplifting
Befriends Skwisgaar after hearing him play at a party
After enrolling in college, Toki offers to help him study, but they can never focus
Has a situationship with Nathan that he's too scared to call anything else
Nathan Explosion
25 y/o
In college for American football
Only got through high school by excelling in football so that was his only notion to go forward
Part of an underground fight club so it's normal for him to be bruised
Pretty popular in his class
Goes to a lot of parties but keeps a low profile
Met Pickles at a party after Skwisgaar bailed on him to study for an exam
His mom enrolled him in a singing class once a week to help him talk more, but no one really knows about it
William Murderface
23 y/o
Wouldn’t be caught dead studying in college after threatening his high school principal into graduating him
Only in college because, once Toki befriended him through one of his gigs, he never left
Lives in Toki’s dorm rent-free to avoid going home to his grandparents
Has a bad reputation that rubbed off on Toki, making them the "weirdo duo"
Used to go to parties, but after getting beaten up trying to hook up with a girl, he gave up on hanging out with the college jackoffs
Doesn't know he has sleep apnea that keeps Toki awake at night
Helps Toki find gigs but usually messes things up, thinking he’s helping (and always asks for a cut of the money for his "help")
Some content I already made for Klokllege:
Pickles and Nathan's first encounters
First contact / The aftermath
Skwisgaar and Toki's soft feels
Glances
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anonymous-dentist · 19 hours
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Part 10.5 of the Catboy in the Village AU
Chapter One | Chapter 10
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So, weirdly enough, there's a literal hole in the castle's wall. It's in the back by a big tower and surrounded by untrimmed bushes and grass taller than Pepito, and it's just big enough for Richarlyson and Pepito to be able to squeeze through.
Richarlyson narrows his eyes at the hole suspiciously. It's a bit too convenient...
Pepito, though, doesn't seem to care. He's too stupid to, probably. (Fucking baby...)
Thumb in his mouth, Pepito looks up at Richarlyson, waiting for orders. This is how it's been for the past, like, forever since their parents got stolen, and this is how it should always be: Richarlyson In Charge.
Richarlyson rolls his eyes and smacks Pepito's hand out of his mouth.
"Stop that," he huffs, not for the first time on this trip, "you're gonna suck your thumb off."
Pepito's lip wobbles, but he nods.
Richarlyson nods.
Pepito nods again.
Richarlyson looks back at the hole.
As soon as he does, Pepito's thumb finds its way back into his mouth.
Richarlyson sighs. Babies...
Pepito is four years old, and he doesn't suck his thumb at home. But he's stressed, and Tío Bad said that it's normal for kids to do it when they're stressed. Richarlyson is nine years old, though, and he hasn't sucked his thumb at all so far, and he's a kid. So Pepito is just a baby, and Richarlyson is sick and tired of him.
Pepito's free hand finds its way to Richarlyson's to hold; Richarlyson allows it.
"I don't trust that hole," Richarlyson declares.
Pepito nods. Around his thumb, he says, "It's creepy."
It is creepy. It's a normal hole, but it has the same vibes as the craters Pa Roier makes with explosive potions out at Tío Etoiles' house when he's angry, and those potions never work right. Pai Cellbit doesn't make them too explode-y, but they always do more than they should, and they smell bad.
Like.
Bad.
This hole doesn't smell bad, but it kinda looks bad. There are weird drawings all around it on the outside going in that look like the ones from Richarlyson's nightmares, all wiggly and purple and red and creepy.
But it's the only way into the castle that Richarlyson has been able to find so far, so.
It's nighttime, so it's dark. There aren't any guards around this part of the castle for some reason, so it's safe. Richarlyson has his knife, and Pepito has... okay, so Pepito is useless, but he's cute enough to be a distraction in case anything does happen.
Richarlyson squeezes Pepito's hand- for Pepito's benefit! Not because Richarlyson is scared at all!
"Come on," he says, and his voice does not shake at all!
He takes a step out from behind the tree he and Pepito have been hiding behind for, like, years, and he pulls a terrified Pepito with him.
Together, they approach the creepy hole. It's just barely taller than Richarlyson's head, but it's pretty big in the other way. Thankfully, it's big enough that they won't have to take their bags off to get through it. (Pepito's bunny is in his bag, and he cries every time he has to take it off, and Richarlyson does not want to deal with that right now!)
Sucking in a deep breath, Richarlyson goes through the hole.
Just as he makes it through the wall, Pepito bites off a scream, and maybe Richarlyson does, too, because the entire castle starts to shake around them like they'd just majorly pissed it off. It even starts screaming, which thankfully covers up their own screams pretty good.
Pepito rushes to hide in Richarlyson's side, shaking; Richarlyson holds him for his benefit, not because Richarlyson is scared himself!
The hole opened up into a small dusty hallway that doesn't look like it's been walked in for, like, centuries. It's super dark, but Richarlyson can sorta make out pictures on the walls just like the ones outside of the hole.
The hallway stretches to both sides, but it looks like there's a staircase on one side.
The castle shakes. Pepito shakes.
The castle screams. Richarlyson does not scream.
"Fucking hole!" Richarlyson shouts, glaring at the hole. He knew it was bad news! He knew it!
He freezes, mouth still open mid-shout, as he hears a rush of armor from the other side of the inside wall. People are shouting about protecting the prince, protecting the queen, protecting the princess, whatever. They don't care about Richarlyson, so Richarlyson doesn't care about them.
The hallway doesn't look like it has any doors in it. Just the stairs, and the other way. But the other way stretches on for forever into darkness, and at least stairs go places.
So Richarlyson covers his ears as best he can and starts towards the stairs. Pepito shakes his head, terrified out of his stupid baby mind, but he goes with him, because he isn't that dumb.
The stairs are tall. They go on for at least three hours until they stop at an open door leading into a dark room.
Richarlyson looks down at Pepito.
Pepito shakes his head again.
Richarlyson walks into the room.
Thank the gods, the room has a window... even though all the light outside is creepy and green and absolutely horrifying and literally not what Richarlyson wanted to see. What happened to the moon? What the heck is wrong with the Gato Kingdom?
The room is small, but it's fancy. Everything including the floor is covered in dust so thick that it's basically a carpet. The bed is small and red, and the window's curtains are long and black. There are bookshelves along every single wall reaching up to the ceiling, but all the books are gone.
There's a desk with a big empty dust-free rectangle on it.
Richarlyson frowns. Where are they?
Suddenly, the shaking and screaming stops. The moon comes back outside, and the green goes away.
There are more footsteps outside, but these ones aren't all armor-y. They're angry footsteps, Richarlyson knows angry footsteps after pranking Tío Bad so many times.
"Demon!" someone, a lady?, shouts outside of the room. "Come out and face me already!"
Richarlyson and Pepito rush to hide under the bed just in case. They've come too far to get caught now...
More angry steps: "I know you're here!"
Pepito huddles up against Richarlyson's side. Richarlyson pulls his knife out, just in case.
Even more angry footsteps, and a slam of a door.
And then:
"She's scary, isn't she?" someone asks right next to Richarlyson's ear.
He jumps and stabs and meets thin air. But he can't meet thin air, because he's looking right at a woman with pale skin and- and-
Richarlyson drops his knife.
"Are you a demon?" he whisper-shout-asks, excitement rising up in him because! Holy shit!
The woman giggles and puts a finger to her mouth. Shh.
"She can't know I'm here," she whispers.
She looks out into the room with a sigh that Richarlyson knows he's heard before. He hears it every time one of his dads sees the other do something "attractive" (blegh.)
Richarlyson's eyes sparkle. There's a demon. And she's in love!
Pepito tugs at Richarlyson's sleeve questioningly. Richarlyson just pushes him away with one hand; not now!
The woman props her chin up on her hand wistfully. "She's amazing."
Very, very quietly, Richarlyson asks, "Then why are you under the bed?"
"Why are you under the bed?" the woman replies. "You aren't supposed to be here. Trespassers."
Pepito wiggles petulantly. "We're not! We're here for our dads! The lady took them!"
Richarlyson shushes him, he's too loud! They're going to get caught!
But the woman just nods.
"You got here just in time," she says. "They missed you."
"Of course they did," Richarlyson scoffs. "We're awesome."
"You seem awesome!" The woman nods. "Bagi is gonna love you!"
"Who?"
"Your aunt... or whatever."
She... doesn't sound too happy about that.
Pepito points out, "We already have an aunt, though."
Richarlyson rolls his eyes. "You can have more than one aunt, idiot."
But Pepito just shakes his head. "But we have Tía Jaiden!"
"Yeah, and we can have more aunts. Like Tía Baghera, right?"
"Who?"
Richarlyson puts his hands in his face with a groan.
The woman laughs. "Aww, you're cute! You Can Stay."
For whatever reason, that feels important. It feels heavy, weighing down on Richarlyson's shoulders, like, physically. The inside of his head itches with the power of whatever she just did.
Demons are so cool!
The feeling passes quickly, leaving Richarlyson breathless.
He removes his hands from his face to ask the demon what she just did, but, when he does, he doesn't see anybody.
She's gone.
Richarlyson stares into thin air for a moment before turning his head to look at Pepito.
"Dad is never going to believe this," he says.
Pepito nods.
After a moment more, Richarlyson wiggles out from under the bed and wipes the dust off his clothes as best he can. He puts his knife away, stretches, yawns. (It's way past his bedtime!)
Pepito soon joins him, thumb actually out of his mouth for once.
"Come on," Richarlyson tells him. "Let's go find them."
And that's when light suddenly floods the room, catching them both in it.
Snapping to attention, Richarlyson spins around and sees the room's door open- not the hallway door, the other one- and a woman standing in it in a nightgown holding a candle.
"Apa Celbi?" Pepito gasps. Which is stupid, but a fair enough guess from a baby because the woman looks just like Pai Cellbit, just, like. A girl. And a bit taller.
The woman drops her candle.
Richarlyson pulls out his knife.
Pepito sticks his thumb in his mouth.
And, down the hall, there's an explosion and a scream.
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storiesbyjes2g · 3 days
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3.171 Happy birthday to ya
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When it got closer to party time, Sophia and I moved the couch to the backyard for more seating options. Our parties always end up fragmented with some sims eating in the house and others on the patio. My goal is to keep everyone together, so hopefully this will help. We also moved the picnic blanket and put the portable crib outside to accommodate the little ones. Because we're friendly again, I invited Yasmine and her girls, but she declined. She doesn't know the other guests and didn't want anyone asking questions about Stacey. I completely understood but feel bad for her. This spellcaster business has really trapped her and the girls in their home.
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Apart from my baby aging up, I'm most excited about having Dub and his family in our home for the first time. Between the deaths and parenthood, it's been super hard for us to connect lately. I guess I was naïve enough to believe it would be easier being in the same city, but life keeps proving it doesn't matter where we are. Life is going to life, and that's that. I suppose I'll have to be more intentional about hanging with him too.
"You got it smelling good out here, bro," a voice says from behind me.
That Henford accent is unmistakable, and I was so glad to hear it. I turned around and embraced him.
"Wassup, man! Did you find us okay? Welcome! Finally!"
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"Right? Took you long enough!"
"Don't even play, man. You know how life is sometimes."
"Sure do. This house is nice! And the view!"
"Thanks. If you're able to stick around later, I'll give you the tour. Hey, where's Maia? Is she coming?"
"Yeah, she's running a little late. She's just finishing up a project for a client."
"Ahhh. See? San Sequoia has been good to you already. I'm glad her business is picking up."
There's no way Dub showed up alone, so I looked around for Tambara, knowing she couldn't be too far behind. I spotted her toddling across the yard, trying her best to catch up with her daddy.
"She's getting to be extremely independent these days," Dub said when he realized I was watching her. "She won't even let us pick her up anymore. I don't mind that so much, but waiting for her really slows me down."
"She'll get faster," I said, thinking about Desiree's determination. "Just give her time."
Tami and Desi look nothing alike, but I see glimpses of the immediate future in her proud face and wobbly gait. I want Desi to grow up and change the world, but I can't part with my little girl. At the same time, I'm anxious to see her continue to grow. I love watching her smash these milestones like the boss baby she is. Ugh. Fatherhood is just a melting pot of contradictions. How can I be happy and sad, proud and scared at the same time?
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Tami finally made her way over to us, so I waved.
"Hey there! Do you remember me? I'm Luca. That's a pretty dress."
Her face lit up, and I knew it didn't matter if she remembered me or not. I was currently her new bestie. Flattery works at all ages, hee hee.
"What do you say when someone gives you a compliment?" Dub asked.
"I know," she shouted.
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Me and Dub had a good laugh. She's so precocious, and I love it. Kids really do say the darndest things, and I can't wait to hear what Desi will have to say. Hopefully that's not a be careful what you wish for situation, heh.
"That's right, Tam," I said. "You better know it."
"How are you holding up?" Dub asked, wiping the smile off my face.
"I'm good. As good as I can be, rather. It gets a little better every day."
"I'm glad to hear it. I can't even think about what that's going to be like."
"It might sound morbid, but you should start thinking about it, man. It's the shock that's hard to get over."
"You play dollies with me," Tambara shouts.
That was probably supposed to be a question, but she's too excited about her new, big friend and it's too cute.
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"Oh, no," Dub says to me. "You start that and she'll never let you go."
She's adorable, looking just like both of them. I hope she and Desi will like each other. It'll be a shame to have them fighting or snubbing each other when we hang out.
"You can play with Desiree later, okay?" he says.
"Speaking of... We should probably get this show on the road soon. Let me finish these ribs."
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(makeovers and family photos below!)
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Dub and fam by @mysimsloveaffair
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hauntingjasper · 2 months
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We are all afraid of something...
I wonder what Prince Gumball's biggest fear would be?
There's an episode (Five short tables I think) where it shows that he's afraid of dying alone/his own mortality to some extent. I imagine that because he's long-lived and most likely has watched many people die before him, he's scared that there won't be anyone else by *his* side when it's his turn. There's no way of knowing when or how, he wouldn't be ready for it, so that's probably double scarier for him. He's an anxious fella
#tag rambling MMMMM MY FAVORITE#this made me think if Gumball is actually just long-lived or if he'd become something like the Mother Gum after enough centuries have passed#triple scary then because other than Neddy(Nelly?) he's the only gum humanoid in Ooo that we're aware of#so what if the deal with the Mother Gum is like... She releases this tiny gum things (or they're released by themselves) into the wild#and good luck baby you better survive if you want our species to continue existing 😄#He and Nelly survived but what if he dies before reaching a Mother Gum-state. and alone on top of that bc that must be a scary process#And if he dies then that means Nelly is alone. and probably would go through that alone too#I think he's also scared of not having anyone to take care of everything he left behind if he dies#and to reassure his people and loved ones that everything will be fine despite his absence#now I'm thinking about the way i portray him because I make it sound like he's “unworried” about his own life & wellbeing#he gets stabbed and he's just like “it's okay don't worry about it” BUT what if he does worry and like..#he knows it won't kill him so he doesn't panic but he might panic if he realizes that he got stabbed a little too close to a vital spot#but at the same time he won't if there's someone else with him because if he panics they'll panic and everyone panics#and he needs to be the bigger person at all times and and#does this make sense or am i just yapping#anyway I love you Gumball i just threw my English out the window to talk about your issues with death 🫶#fionna and cake#prince gumball
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sulfurzee · 2 months
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> You are encased in the cement that is those you love who love you.
> It protects you. Makes you beautiful. It will immortalize you.
> Your legs are restless.
> You're going to have to move, sooner or later.
> The sun will blind you, at first. The wind will feel like razors against your skin for a time.
> Do you think it'll be worth it?
> Who would choose to become human, over art?
> There will be times where your once graceful shoulders will hunch in pain. Your formerly serene face crumpled in ugly anger.
> You will be so scared to turn around and see the wreckage. Chunks of cement and dust are all that will be left of the statue you used to be.
> Aren't you scared?
#whoah personal#poetry#i guess but also oh god this sucks#idk. im just thinking about who i want to be#and how that'll mean taking a sledgehammer to the person i used to be#and I'm scared that whatever is left after that destruction won't be worth it#that I'll be so much smaller and more twisted than I was before#and I'm also scared that the people who lean on me as i am now will topple and break if i change#what if i look too different underneath. what if it hurts them. what if they leave#destroying a person who based thenself off of the love others gave them is gonna mean rejecting the love i took#all for what? to become something else? to change in ways I can't prepare for yet?#or what if the people who love me are hurt in the aftermath?#i love them too. it's just im always scared that love isn't enough on its own#i cant just be someone who loves them. i need to be someone they love too. someone they need#god who even am i#i dont know who i would choose to be if i ran away tomorrow#thats why i wrote this. i want to run away and start it all from scratch#but im scared to run away. i know itll hurt. would it be good or bad?#this poem is inaccurate because it paints their love as smothering. its not. i smother myself and i dont know why#but its warm and nice and safe#this is also sort of about being trans but thats like. not even half of what this crisis is about#its not enough to just be a daughter. you cant just be a daughter or an older sister or a friend your whole life.#that cant be all of who and what you are. you have to be you above all else and thats fucking terrifying#idk. anyways iput sparkly license plate covers on my work vans 2 months ago and if my bosses find out I'll get yelled at#so i'm going to go take those off now. bye
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dogearedheart · 6 days
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🏞🏞🏞
#the thing is I'm not proud of many things I've done. It's actually the exact opposite.#I kinda suck most of the time if I'm honest. but getting sober and doing it all on my own...#it's one of the only things I'm proud of when it comes to myself. sure.it's my third attempt but 1 year and 3 months...#it's the longest time I've ever managed to not try and deal with myself in a way that slowly but surely fucked me up in a very different way#I still struggle. some days are easier than others#but I'm still doing it.#being sober doesn't magically solve all my other issues but I don't spiral as much as I used to.#i don't think I'll ever be someone people can be around. which is like i don't blame people. i know how i am and how fucking difficult it is#to deal with that. the fear of abandonment that makes me push people away until they leave. the self-fulfilling prophesy of it all#the way i push and when i get the result i was expecting the immediate pull the fear and irrationality#the emotional disreggulation the self-pity#it's gotten better since i stopped drinking. less frequently and all that... but it's never gone not really#sometimes i think about the what could've beens.#what if my childhood went a little differently. what if my dad was there for me when i needed him. what if i wasn't me.#my ex best friend once told me that I'm to desperate to be saved. that nobody can do that anyway.#I'm not sure if I'd deserve it anyway. i have dreams in which I'm still me still dark and ugly and selfish and cruel at times#but i am trying i like to believe that i am already trying. i am. I'm just scared that it'll never be enough.#I'm not proud of many things but I'm 1 year and 3 months sober#only a few days and it's gonna be 1 year and 4 months#i didn't achieve much in my life but I'm here and i am trying every day i am trying and i hope on day it'll be enough#i hope one day i won't cause pain but build something good#sorry... I've just been thinking about it lately#because it is an achievement and i didn’t let myself be proud of how far I've come#alex talks#I'm still scared that people will look at me differently when they know... sometimes i feel like they can see the my rotten core anyway#to delete
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keeps-ache · 4 months
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ggghhg i hate vehiclessssssss ghghghhghhhhh [dies dies dies forever]
#just me hi#i'm going to get right back to it but i need to complain or i'll turn into a stale loaf of Bread lmao :3👍#so here it is. why's it gotta be so hard hhghfh#okay buildings suck i hate buildings. but also they don't make me want to immediately explode at the merest hint of actually drawing them#vehicles?? Vehicles ???? i am going to just. what if i just put everyone in magical cardboard boxes and did that huh. what is the point !!#i have to draw motorcyclessss and carssssss and i'm okay with bikes to a degree actually <3 and horsessssssss and truckssssssssssss#god forbid you pick an older model with like 20 articles on it cuz most of them are going to only have a side profile and 3/4s view of that#dang thing. which yea sounds manageable 'why is this a problem keeps' i cannot properly see the FRONT#i have to guess?? i have to Guess ???? my dearest wish i think i'm just going to live in the sewers. with the sewer creatures#GGHHHHHHHHHHHH#i am going to practice drawing this stupid thing that i'm going to use for like 7 panels MAX and then i'm going to commit a FOUL crime. lik#rearranging someone's usual playlist without them knowing so they're confused every time they listen to it afterwards#//okay enough of that. we're good hbfhsfh :3#i have done other things today ! i've actually made a rough timeline for pi.e so thaaaat's cool :D#that and found a cool artist to follow on pillowfort. i. forgor their user but they have cool art .w.#/also i'm past the halfway mark on this first chapter which is !!!#i don't want to jinx myself cuz i know i'm really good at that hfhsv - but i think i'll start storyboarding the next part if i can get a#couple more pages done :D#//also the cowboy au grows stronger everyday hhhgfshvbh#i kind of knew some sort of au was inevitable but i did not think it would be an old west one loll :3#still trying to figure out the logistics#i wanna find some good historical fiction from those eras (1860s-70s) but i do not have the brain space for it rn fbhs - so this will do :>#it won't have any of the magic or gods i think bc of that but i'm having fun regardless :D#it Does have some occult though. because i was playing the story for my brother and i Do enjoy scaring him hhbvhfhsfvh#there are devils on the ranch!! or are they devils?? he hasn't gotten that far yet lol :>#//i also may have some sort of weird lean towards the spooky because Somehow each of my stories end up containing some sort of thriller#element?? lmao rip my siblings#but it never happens on purpose. again; rip my siblings hfhhvsh#//oo running out of tag space lol <//3#i shall return. probably with more wip stuff cuz i started like 4 canvases in 2 days hhghghdvs - toodles !!
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[[ Peeks in for a bit]]
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gohard-or-gohomo · 1 year
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God I wish I were dead
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bongsavior · 1 year
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why does everyone else's state dictate how i'm doing? why do i obsess over how everyone is, except for myself?
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tenok · 9 days
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#I love angst as much as any other person but I feel like people lean too hard into CROWLEY WANT TO KILL HIMSELF WITH HOLY WATER BECAUSE#AZIRAPHALE LEFT#because first: Crowley never showed any suicidal intentions in canon#ever#whole holy water fight was *because* Aziraphale was absolutely baselessly scared that Crowley will hurt himself and Crowley just couldn't#get it and even attempt to calm him down#like sleep or drink or run away? ok#I prefer to think that Crowley will work in averting the second coming but I get it#functional and capable Crowley is not everyone's cup of tea#but also second: Crowley dying from holy water is literally Aziraphale's biggest (semi)irrational fear we saw in canon#like his reaction was overblown in a way we only saw when he dealt with literal apocalypse#Crowley's perfectly aware of this#and this...this not only shows Crowley a) suddenly losing all his optimism b) leaving earth and humans on their own c) leaving Aziraphale on#his own#it's also shows him cruel. not on petty 'dance a little dance for me' level. not on sending nazis to hell level. on the 'let's deliberately#hurt person that deeply loves me (and that I deeply love too) in most cruel and inreparable way'#I can't stress it enough — *intentionally*. burdening him with it *forever*#like. even if you imagine that Crowley *is* stupid enough to not get that Aziraphale was afraid of giving him holy water *because* he's#scared shitless of him dying (and also dying specifically because of him)#he still should get that Aziraphale cares for him in some capacity (I'm not talking about people that makes Crowley cry 'Aziraphale never#loved me at all' because those people saw some other series)#Crowley should understand that him killing himself would absolutely destroy Aziraphale#and I can't wrap my mind around it. like. Crowley won't hurt Aziraphale. not in that way.#again don't get me wrong you can write ooc fics all you want it's just...when some kind of trope gets so popular you start to question what#part of character's character made you accept this as valid and highly accepted interpretation#like I don't like slutty subby Crowley in fics but I get it he looks good in tight jeans and simps hard for Aziraphale. with this tho??#I'm absolutely lost it looks like whole other character for me#sidebote: would absolutely read good IC fic/hc about Crowley being suicidal/attempting suicide. but in my heart Aziraphale is the one that#will consider suicide as an (absolutely rational! he has arguments!) option meanwhile Crowley's like NO ANGEL THAT'S NOT FUCKING NORMAL
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homunculus-argument · 4 months
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If I had more money than I'd ever spend in a lifetime, I'd spend my life operating a pizzeria at a loss. Something with the slogan of "it ain't italian but you're hungry" - and a statement of how this is not authentic italian pizza because the owner's estranged aunt's italian ex-husband would not serve pizza in his italian restaurant because as far as he was concerned, a pizza is the "just throw that shit together" dish that you make out of leftovers, and he would not serve that to paying customers even if they wanted it. True story btw.
But I'd just like to run a place where the staff is allowed to tell rude customers to fuck off. And if they're scared to do that, they can summon me downstairs to do it myself (this fantasy involves having my own apartment upstairs of the restaurant), because you don't fucking disrespect my staff like that. Develop a reputation as a place where You'd Better Act Yourself or you get nothing, which elevates the quality of the food in peoples' minds because it's human to assume that more work=more worth, and if a pizza place can afford to simply throw rude customers out, that clearly must mean that the food is just that good that going back is worth it anyway.
Hiring enough people to get the work done in a leisurely pace and occasionally have the time to chat with each other or customers. You just do the job I gave you in the time I gave you, don't steal anything and don't watch porn off your phone anywhere where the customers can see you, you're good. Don't care if you quit school at 16 if you can still mop floor. Don't care if you've been to prison because you killed some guy, as long as you're not doing that here. Don't care if you deal drugs on your free time as long as you don't bring your business to your day job. This place is exclusively for pizza business.
Have an item on the menu called "random pizza" - and if you order that one, they'll just throw in a mix of whatever ingredients we've got too much of, like if the bell peppers gotta be used before they go bad, every single random pizza is going to have them until they're either gone or need to get tossed. If you've got dietary restrictions or allergies, you gotta specify that while ordering, because other than that, random pizza is just whatever ingredients we need to get rid of. Surplus ingredients du jour.
Building a reputation as a place that's somehow simultaneously sketchy as hell but also remarkably high quality, getting five star restaurant customer service from a waiter with blue hair and stick-n-poke tattoos, there's a homeless guy at the back of the kitchen eating an order that nobody picked up, every surface is spotless and no matter how important of a suit-and-tie you are, if you won't behave yourself the owner will personally physically fight you.
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viosjaan · 7 months
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#i need to talk to you so fucking badly but i don't know how#i hate you a little for convincing me that we could do this we could be this weird thing between more than friends but less than lovers#and that i could be okay with it#i told you i couldn't#i told you i was so scared of losing you fucking everything up hurting you again#you said it would be fine#it's not fucking fine#you said not to test your self control but do you want to see pictures of me in a tank top#sometimes i hate you so much for perfectly knowing which buttons of mine to push to get me to agree to you#i hate that i can't even hate you properly because im too busy feeling fucking fond ki aw kitni cute hai kitna mast flirt karti hai there's#no going back you're it for me#when you're not. im tired of waiting and hoping#it's literally a vicious fucking cycle we fight we make up things stay good for a while but then ek din we talk at 2 am#and my fucking feelings become too real and i start having expectations hopes for our future together and then one tiny thing#happens something that is normal but perfecy for shattering my illusion like you saying 'uske liye pehle date bhi toh karna padega na' and#flirting with others#i hate that i can't express my feelings well i hate that i was too fucking embarrassed to say that#i know it doesn't mean anything to you but it means something to me. it means that you don't respect our relationship enough it means that#other people believe you're single and available and they're shooting their shot trying to impress you and it's so fucking maddening ki idk#i want to kill them all i hate them so much#i hate that you bring out the worst and best parts in me i hate that i feel so possessive and angry but also how i always try to be gentler#more soft hearted to people in my life because of you because of your lovable tender heart i hate the way i try to talk to my mom politely#because you love your mom. i hate that i don't hate anything at all about all of this except for the fact that you're not physically here#i miss you and love is understanding and i won't ever find anyone like you again and i don't want to remove enchanted from my ts playlist#but i also don't know how to not cry everytime i listen to it i don't know how to listen to renegade and think#that whoa i used to be the renegade in my first relationship and now it's you you're the renegade and you need me and all that joking about#i could fix you but i couldn't. i can't. not because you're too broken but because it hurts too much to stay im not strong enough to be#there for you
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rucow · 10 months
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having jas (my tes oc who is nerevar's and voryn's daughter) be a direct rival of almalexia is funny bc they both Hate each other and want to throttle one another but they can't. they need to uphold their public image so the only battles they fight are political debates and throwing shade at one another. if they ever get locked in a room together, at least one of them will end up Dead
#the girlbosses are fighting#ayem should be like jas' step-aunt or something like that 😭 but instead they end up being two very intense and ambitious women#who would do Anything to achieve their goals (in jas' case) or to maintain their image and power (in ayem's case)#id be scared to put them in a room together 😭 thankfully they both have enough self control to not jump at each other's throats in public#jas uses her heritage (being nerevar's daughter) against almalexia at any chance she gets#she will never miss an opportunity to let the good people of morrowind know that She Is Nerevar's Heir and morrowind's Rightful Ruler#she puts on such a grand and benevolent image just to gain the support of the dunmer people#but in reality she just wants revenge for her House and for her PARENTS#she was a child when nerevar and voryn were killed . goodness knows she feels she has every right to go berserk on the tribunal#jas is a fun character bc she doesn't serve Anyone but herself. she doesnt even serve azura though azura tried to gain jas' loyalty#in the same way she had nerevar's undying loyalty and servitude#but jas isn't nerevar. she's much more rebellious and she tries to hold the reins of fate in her own hands#she won't accept the nerevarine prophecy and she won't accept the tribunal going unpunished and she wont accept her House being erased#she is so so ambitious. and so so strong. and so very unforgiving#she's not evil. she's just a firestorm of a woman who wants justice. she wants the tribunal to admit what theyve done. publicly#she knows that if she can expose the tribunal she Will gain the trust & support of the dunmer people & she Will get the position she seeks#whether or not she succeeds remains to be seen........ i believe in her. but where's the fun in a story with a perfect ending?#her story will have a bloody end thats for sure. but it wont be her own blood. it'll be the blood of everyone loyal to her#who have sacrificed themselves for jas' cause#jas is JUST like nerevar but worse. much worse#and i love her#shes amazing and powerful and knows how to manipulate politics sooo well 💞💞💞#i luv her
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reader x dog shifter 141
There's a pack of dogs that won't leave you alone. A Great Dane, a German shepherd, and two others you can't quite pin down--a foxhound and some sort of lab, maybe? You saw them while walking home one night, and though you'd picked up the pace out of worry you'd be mauled, first impressions turned out to be the opposite. You didn't even notice the man who'd followed you down the block--not until he'd dropped his knife and was screaming bloody hell. So after calling the emergency number, and filing a police report, you took the four home with you. And that was that.
Now your friends are convinced you've got a mini army. You have to admit that the dogs function like one, too, though you chalk that up to the instincts of a pack. The Great Dane calling the shots; the shepherd biting at heels if necessary. But the foxhound is a bundle of joy who keeps getting into your food, and the lab is the sweetest boy who loves to lay his head in your lap. And sure, they're plenty of mouths to feed, but you have a good enough job. And they seem to entertain themselves, sometimes whining when you have to leave. But never doing anything to mess up the house or rile you up. And they never follow you into the bathroom, instead running out when you're about to change. Not to mention that they're oddly clean.
"When do you think she'll realize it takes human hands for Soap to get all that food?"
"Eh, give it a few more days. Would be a shame to scare her so soon.'
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Bonus Thoughts:
Dog pile naps. Dog piling in general. It gets cold in the winter, but you don't need the fireplace to keep you warm. You've got four dog-sized heat packs to snuggle up to. And they're always in rotation for who gets to play pillow.
The only issue is that they absolutely hate men. You're convinced they're sexist since they get along with your girl friends just fine, but any guy comes over? Gets within ten feet of you? B A R K. In reality, though, they just chase off all the guys who eye you like a piece of meat. Which is most guys. Poor girl. Silly little thing. That's okay--they'll keep you safe--because you're pack now, and you're theirs.
We've got a part two!
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