#sexyperson

[auxwired]

WAKE UP!!! WAKE THE FUCK UP!!!!! 13 MINUTES BEFORE THE SEDYMAN POLL WINS!!! WE CAN STILL PULL THROUGH. WE CANT LET NAGITO WIN. VOTE WHEATLEY AND BILL. IDC IF YOU DONT HAVE TWOTTER GET AN ACCOUNT AND VOTE!!!! NAOWWWWW

[jalapenoscumbag]

Attempting to classify all five iStation math SEM villains as sexymen (PART 2)

Once again, no picture in this post belongs to me. This time around, I cannot find any Sterling Handrick made art of the last villain I have yet to classify, the Math-a-Magician. I consider him to be the most elusive out of all five villains, as I could only find so few pictures of him (very ironic to his canon description, too). The information I used to classify this character in particular goes mostly off assumptions, my personal childhood memories, and his in game bio.

5. ) Math-a-Magician

Angst(?)– "Out for revenge."

Artsy– Is a magician.

DILF/GILF(?)– I interpret his character to probably be the oldest out of all five villains, as he's portrayed as a washed-up celebrity of sorts.

Egotistical– Ties into (possible) angst, where the reason he's out for revenge is that he isn't getting enough attention in the digital age.

Eye Imagery– See design.

Smartdumb– Same reasoning as each other villain in iStation math's SEM program.

Mysterious– More so a magic thing than a character/personality thing.

Nonhuman/Object Head– His head is a top hat.

Pathetic– Once again my interpretation, I could probably fix him. (he just wants to be loved)

Power– Magic.

Short– Itty bitty little guy.

Villain– Self explanatory.

Well-Dressed, Suitguy, & Cape– Self explanatory again.

Screenshots are from an iStation team introduction video.

[allistrations]

I went for it and have Bare Bones valentines cards available for purchase in my Etsy shop! If you would like to receive them in time for Valentines Day never fear because I will ship them out asap :), link in my bio! #boneart #skeleton #skeletonart #skeletondoodle #boneartist #valentinecards #valentinecard #greetingcard #carddesign #greetingcarddesign #greetingcardillustration #cardillustration #notecardart #cartoonart #sexyskeletons #sexydrawing #sexytattoos #sexyperson #roses #idk #goodbye #etsyseller #etsyshop #etsysellersofinstagram (at Brooklyn, New York) https://www.instagram.com/p/Cn79uhtLTtf/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=

[gayest-classiclit]

Classic Literature Sexyperson Tournament; Round 1

propaganda:

Mercutio:

has an article

watch the baz lurhman movie. that's the propaganda.

He is absolutely full of Gender and chaos and frightening narrative awareness for a guy who seems to think (hope?) he’s in a comedy until the minute he dies. I love a guy who can prophesy the deaths of his friends while consistently being comic relief.

i mean come on.

I feel like Mercutio fits exactly into the sexy person category. He’s a prince, he’s a fighter, he may ambiguously be in love with his besties, hes a silly guy, he dies tragically.

Carmilla:

Um. Vampire. Seductress. Sapphic

[nicosaysnope]

while i am looking forward to the podcast sexyperson election on @fictionpodsexyperson non of my favourite fucked up girls made the cut :/

[bluartist]

most of my fictional crushes are like this ngl

[mishkakagehishka]

Why YOU should vote Mika in the @enstars-sexyperson-polls poll!!!

What makes a man "sexy"? What is that mysterious, ever-elusive quality that can turn adorable into attractive? This is, naturally, a question with no objective answer. But if one were to try real hard, a possible conclusion can be reached.

To start with, what makes a man "sexy"? The obvious answer is "sex appeal". A man who dresses well, elegantly,

where appeal is kept in this apparent tidiness, this put-together image he presents. A suit and tie, with a blazer draped elegantly over his shoulders, loafers and slacks, elegant shirt tucked in, added attraction levels in the form of suspenders, and a dog (to imply he is good with animals, a trait most attractive). For an extra point, a focus on the sole of his shoe, perfect to be stepped on. In the middle image, this elegance is added to in the form of a dated yet chic suit, layered and accessorised with pearls and a hat, the lapels giving off an aura of a man with a fortune to his name, his outstretched hand inviting and open. The same motif of an inviting outstretched hand is in the left-most image, the Valentine's event card. Of course, just in being a Valentine's card, his being sexy is a given. Gloves, suits, blazers and dress-shirts, the only skin we can see is a coquettish view of his wrists. Truly, the suit makes the man in this case. But that's not all there is to Mika's sexiness.

Perhaps sex appeal is a man who shows off skin in the most delicate of ways,

not unlike a fanciful bird who shows off its colorful feathers to impress a mate, Mika's FS2 shows his brightness, his identity. What is more appealing than a man sure of his style? Though colourful and bright, he accessorised with safety pins, DIY chains, little bears and rings, platform shoes with wings and a devil's tail. Can we say punk? Truly the little devil; different from the coquettish flash of the wrist in the previous images, in this he presents a bolder view: his knee and leg peeking from torn jeans, his jacket falls seductively to reveal the gentle skin of his shoulders, and, finally (and most importantly), his middle.

The way in which his tummy is shaded implies far more than one might assume at first glance. There is no roughness of hard abs, no unpleasant and uninviting cold. Indeed, it would seem that Mika's stomach is not flat, that a smidge of squishy fat is stored in it. Truly, I ask of you: what could possibly be sexier, than a man's soft tummy? And it's not just about his FS2.

Indeed, as we can see in the image above, Mika's casual spring-summer outfit has a certain detail to it one might describe as "slutty", which is to say, an extension of "sexy". That's right. Under that sleek black jacket, he is wearing nothing short of a sleeveless shirt with a high neckline. Now you, dear reader, tell me if you find that unsexy! His bare arms have even found their way into a 3* card,

And despite it not showing as much skin (though, as stated above, there is no need for a man to show skin to be sexy), the Antique Legend is also one exuding sex appeal. Simply look at that posing, the sultry, yet laidback appearance it gives him, the coy position of the wrist holding a fan, one of few cards to bring his full body into the picture.

And how could I ever hope to describe Mika's sex appeal without mentioning the Black-Haired Living Doll card?

What can be sex appeal? It can be a man with his hands covered in blood, a man dressed like an affluent and powerful figure, yet presented in a most debased manner. Decadence at its finest. With the blood decorating his collar and caking his fingers, Mika presents the image of sexiness through danger. It is almost mythological in nature, as many of the most dangerous beings have been presented as attractive to the point of being irresistible - from Slavic mythological beings "so beautiful that it was only natural they were evil" to Biblical demons "so beautiful to tempt you", to Oscar Wilde's Dorian Gray "so beautiful, oh, the horrors he must have done to achieve it". It is sex appeal through fear, through inhumanity.

And if, to you, sex appeal is less human, but more benevolent? Perhaps, sex appeal lies in animal features mixing with human. Mika has that, too.

Of course, when talking about Mika's appeal, one must also mention his defining feature, the very thing that sets him apart from the rest of the cast. As Keito Hasumi said when evaluating ex-Valkyrie, Mika's eyes are his defining feature.

His mismatched eyes pull people in, his visual charm lies in these eyes. But it's not just the heterochromia, although it is undeniably a core part of his design, it is their shape. Mika's face is designed to be sharp, and this includes his eyes. This is, of course, to contrast Shu's softer features. This is symbolic. These symbols, too, are sexy.

Not quite a Madonna-Whore complex, but Valkyrie is based on this opposition. Where Shu is soft, Mika is sharp. Where Shu represents the virginal goddess Astraea, Mika represents the base, the carnal, the filthy.

The sex appeal.

Furthermore, in the very story "Astraea's Atelier", this is corroborated, as Leo mentions that Mika's very art leans into the erotic. He knows what he is doing.

Beyond Mika's eyes, we must mention his other defining feature. Not as unique as his eyes, but important all the same - his singular fang that pops out at random.

Although as seen above, all four of his canines are emphasised, it is most often that only one is actually shown in cards and in the 3D models. This is, of course, charming, an almost teasing peak into his physiognomy, a hint to the fact that he could, should he wish, tear your flesh apart with his teeth. This, too, is sex appeal.

A natural progression from looking at his teeth is to look at his tongue. Though the common "blep" is certainly cuter than sexy, and Mika has plenty such cards, there is much to say about the way in which he sticks out his tongue in these, as if provoking, teasing. This is not just a playful or mocking gesture, and he knows as much.

Finally, what else can "sexy" be? Must it be tied to appearance only? Or does it go deeper than that? Is "sexy" not also the way a man carries himself? Is it not also his skills, his hobbies, his very personality? Is "sexy" not the sum of a man, but merely one trait, tied only to the visual senses? Is Mika not sexy in the way that he dances, spins and twirls, skilfully and gracefully? Is he not sexy in the way that he shows his intelligence in the weirdest ways, was he not sexy for reading the Mabinogion in Middle English? Is he not sexy for getting over his own shyness when it comes to speaking on television and radio shows because of Shu's own shyness? Is he not sexy for the fact that he collects creepy and scary posters to help him sleep better? Is he not sexy for the fact that he dumpsterdives, finds plushies, fixes and names them? Is he not sexy for being a weird little freak who likes eroguro and is suspiciously fine with murder and violence? Is Mika Kagehira not sexy?

Mika's sex appeal also lies in one very important aspect of his character, one very dear to me, and that's why I saved it for last. Mika speaks in a non-standard dialect, and his production is thickly accented. I have already ranted about the way this aspect subverts many tropes related to characters with audible "hick" accents, but this is not about design and tropes, this about sex appeal. Can you really listen to Mika speak, the way he sometimes slurs his words and speaks through a pout, the way his words blend and the way his production is impacted by his dialect, and say that this is not sexy? There is nothing sexier than a non-standard production. A vote for Mika is a vote against prescriptivism and linguistic chauvinism. Vote Mika. For your local linguist MikaP (me).

To sum up, while Mika very well could be described as "cute", this does not negate the fact that he can also be described as "sexy". Whether looking at it from a strictly visual point or looking at Mika as a whole character, he undeniably has a certain sex appeal to him. Present in all aspects of his character, from his sharp facial features, to his personal and Valkyrie-adjacent style, to the way he speaks, behaves and interacts with the world. "Sexy" is not a word with only one definition, nor is it a word limited in its usage, "sexy" is a word that merely aims to describe a person with sex appeal, who appeals to people, who draws people in, and it is my scholarly and educated opinion that Mika, in fact, carries these traits in his characterisation, no matter the fact that his sex appeal is interwoven and mingles with his cuteness. Mika is a character based on contrast and opposition, between his apparent harmlessness and freakish tendencies, between his soft-spoken and shy nature and his love for horror and gore. It is not, then, unusual to notice the contrast between his cute moments, his appearance made to appeal to the side of our brains that squeals at the sight of a kitten who can't do much on its own, and his moments brimming with eros, the sex appeal that lay dormant underneath his surface. Indeed, in a way, his sex appeal being a thing to be discovered only further emphasises his sexiness.

Further reading:

[samantha-and-her-chaotic-desires]

POV: they saw all the NSFW posts on here.

I am going to super hell for this /nsrs

um.....I spent hours of my life on this and I dunno how to feel :D

Enjoy the Sexymen! (and Samantha's there too FGHGFGGHJKHG)

!!!DO NOT REPOST/RETRACE!!!

[textsfromthefifthbasement]

And the winner of the gothic lit sexyperson poll is...

Christine Daae!

[koravelliumavast]

rest in peace kaladin you're not dead yet but you would hate this:

[secretlyhuntokar]

When the tumble sexy-person tierlist doesn't even have one of the Original Sexymen™ Cecil Gershwin Palmer

[gayest-classiclit]

Classic Literature Sexyperson Tournament; Round 1

propaganda:

Quincey:

quincey deserves #1 sexyman prize. he is the token cowboy. in a gothlit book. his first instinct when in danger in to randomly shoot through windows to (scare the shit out of) protect his friends. he decided he would literally die for a group of people he met like 3 hours ago because they seemed nice enough. he's texan for christ's sake. tropes: angst (dead), bait, distinctive voice, LGTBQ+ coded (dracula polycule is canon bram told me so), himbo (-ish), well dressed (cowboy).

Dracula:

owwsaawoagghb. older gentleman who is very regal and polite and is a fucking vampire how much sexier can you get

Obv everyone knows vampire sexy. The sensuality of drinking blood is *chef's kiss*. But I just really wanted an excuse to share this one thing, that isn't even related directly to the novel. So, my junior year of high school we read Dracula, and then our class went on a field trip to see a local theatre group perform the Dracula stage play-- and EVERY TIME Dracula came on stage, his neckline would progressively dip Lower and Lower (like. Comedically so) until he was soooo close to showing just straight up tiddie, but still juuuust barely not-- the tease was immaculate and istg it was doing Something for everyone in the audience. It was transcendent. An awakening. Even all these years later when my old high school friends and I bring it up, the only detail we can remember from that performance is Count Dracula's plunging neckline and that's Gotta count for something right

[soullessbullshit]

Khoshekh: The stars are beautiful tonight...

Ayrenn: You know what else is beautiful?

Razum-dar: Naryu Virian.

Ayrenn/Khoshekh: Agreed.

[ducessaeva]

I just think she’s neat

[samantha-and-her-chaotic-desires]

DOUBLE TROUBLE IS A TUMBLR SEXYPERSON. IT'S ON THE SEXYPEDIA.

WE FINALLY FUCKING DID IT PEOPLE. WE FUCKING DID IT!!!!!