#she really wanted to go but my mom cant stand for the whole show to chaperone

[jesterguy]

Two Door Cinema Club is coming in February and I'm going if it costs me my life

[soggyriceee]

strawberry | John Price

summary: price gets you to use your safe word

warnings: rough sex, choking, biting, spanking, overstimulation, public oral (male receiving), slapping(mentions of blood). just like really aggressive John until the end where we get soft core John, not edited bc of how much I wrote so, ignore and possible typos PLZ

Price was always pretty rough with you during sex. but never enough to make you cry like he did tonight. he was a whole new person, new man. and all it took was the teasing at dinner with his family to set him off.

it started off light. pulling your dress down in the car, showing off the top of your boobs. of course, you played dumb, apologizing and saying 'I didn't know'. at first he had fallen for it, saying he wouldn't mind if you kept it that way. but then, you got more bold and cocky. under the dinner table, your hand found its place on his pants, right where his dick rested so peacefully. his eyes that were once on the menu were now on your innocent ones. "is everything alright?" his mother asked. John smiled and nodded, a small chuckle leaving his lips. "yes she just looks so pretty tonight doesn't she? cant keep my eyes off her." he smiled, looking back down at you.

the rest of the dinner you got progressively more cocky. to the point his dick was now out, resting in your warm hand. his parents talked about John's passion for the military, how he'd been dedicated to it his whole life. all while your hand played with his tip, squeezing it ever so gently. his hand was quick to find your thigh, gripping it firmly. thankfully, the cloth was enough to cover his lower half and yours, but the thrill of it all was still very much there. when the waiter had came by, you smoothly let his girth go, using the table cloth to cover his hard on. you smirked at the tiny wet circle that appeared onto the cloth right where his tip was.

when his parents were deep into the menu, the waiter helping them with choosing what to eat, John leaned down to your ear and whispered, "keep this up I promise you'll regret it. don't test me lovie." he smiled down at you before turning back to his parents. you pressed your thighs together, smiling softly to yourself. this was exactly what you wanted from him.

his dick remained out for the rest of the dinner, your hand occasionally reaching down and giving it a firm grab, surprising him each time. by the time dinner was done, he had come close to finishing at least 3 times, always flicking your hand away. he was good at keeping his moans and groans suppressed (public sex was something you both had often), but when he'd cum that was a whole different situation.

"well it was lovely seeing you both tonight. we should do this more often." you smiled to his parents as John tried to put his throbbing dick back into his pants. "it was. thank you for inviting us out. hopefully next time we do meet you both will tell us your pregnant." his mom winked, standing from the table. you blushed and looked at John who's eyes were already staring at you. " who knows mom. you might get lucky real soon." he said, his eyes remaining on yours.

the car ride was silent. you were excited but also a bit nervous about what he had in store. of course, you had a feeling it would be nothing short of amazing. "I had fun with your parents." you said as he pulled to a red light. he shifted his whole body to you, tilting his head to the side. "really? seems you had too much fucking fun." he said, his deep voice suddenly turning into a threatening tone. you shifted in your seat, a proud smile still plastered across your face. "I did. you didnt?" you asked innocently, batting your eye lashes.

before he could respond the light turned green. he shifted back to his original position, driving off quickly. his driving got you both home within 10 minuets, and he was quick to get out the car, slamming the door behind him. he walked over to your side, opening the door and helping you out. it was dark outside, about 9:30 at night. the only light that lit the street was the porch lights on each house.

when he had helped you out fully, he quickly dragged you to the front of the car, shoving you down. you gasped at the pain of your knees and the cement, looking up at him. " John that fucking-" his hand came crashing across your face, gripping your chin so you'd look back up at him. "think I fucking care after that shit you pulled at dinner?" he growled, his grip on your chin growing firmer. you looked up at him, smiling innocently. " I was just having fun tho." you said softly, fingers playing with the ends of his pants.

he growled and let your face go, going to his pants buckle while keeping eye contact. "wanna play silly little games like that, okay. lets play." he gripped your hair at the top of your head, forcing your head back. you gasped at the sudden tug, biting your lip at the same time. "open." he said, gripping his dick with his other hand, jerking it off in front of you. "but captain were outside" you smirked, only teasing him more. "stop fucking playing with me. open your goddam mouth." he growled, tugging your hair. you whimpered at the pain, but ultimately opened your mouth. he wasted no time shoving his dick down your throat, your hands immediately going to his thighs to keep balance.

" s..shit. this what you wanted, hm? just needed my dick down your fucking throat." he growled, pulling his hips back before moving them back onto your face. you were unable to even say anything, but the way you nodded slowly as best you could, he smiled down at you. it was so thrilling, getting your face fucked outside in public. the way he looked down at you with such admiration, his dick repeatedly hitting the back of your throat, just to slide back out again.

he pulled your head back a bit more, your head resting on the front bumper of the car now. that same hand rested onto the car hood, his other on your shoulder. "g..gonna fuck that throat faster. bet you want that huh?" he groaned, his hips moving faster. his head fell back, grip on your shoulder tightening. to be honest, John had never gone this far with face fucking. he was pretty gentle when it came to head. sex, no, but when you gave him head it was never something that he forced upon you or was super rough with. he let you take your time, breaks whenever you needed. he was patient. but not tonight and it was definitely something you had to get used to.

your drool practically poured out your mouth, his dick slippery with your saliva. the mix of his pre cum and your saliva made it even easier for his throat to slide down your throat, and it was a feeling he wanted to keep on feeling. tears poured out your eyes the more rough he got with you, mascara running down your cheeks. and he loved it. "look do fucking gorgeous like this love. wanna fuck your face more." he moaned, watching his dick and a fuck ton of saliva come from your mouth as he pulled his dick out, sliding it back in to watch it all pool at the corners of your lips.

to be honest, it was a bit much. again, it was something neither of you had really experienced before. and as much as you tried to relax your throat, it was pretty hard because of how fast and rough he was getting. but when he whimpered out your name, head falling forward, mouth slightly agape, you couldnt give up. "gonna cum baby.. gonna cum down that tight fucking throat." he moaned, his had that was once on your shoulder cupping your cheek. you squeezed your eyes shut, whimpering around his dick. his body jerked forward, his body falling forward onto the hood of the car, his cum shooting down your throat.

he gasped, strained groans leaving him, his hips giving you small thrusts. "t-thats it baby.. fucking swallow.. all of it." he groaned, breathing heavily above you. you tried your best to swallow it all, only a bit seeping out of your lips. he slowly slid his dick out, strings of saliva, cum or even both connecting you both. shoving his soaked dick back in his pants, he looked down at you. your jaw hurt, lips too. you looked up at him, chest heaving up and down. "get the fuck up." he said, gripping your arm and pulling you up into his chest. he gdragged you to the front door, quickly opening the door and shoving you inside.

you had tripped, but ultimately kept your balance. his keys were thrown onto the mail table as he flicked the light on, making quick movements towards you. saliva was still smeared across your face, his cum too. but to say he cared would be a lie. his lips pressed firmly against yours, his tongue sliding in easily, his hand pressed to the back of your neck while his other gripped your ass. "couch. now" he said against your lips. you stumbled backwards, quickly making your way to the couch. despite your stumbling he walked towards you slowly, his head tilted to the side a small smirk plastered along his face. he loved the shy, kinda shocked version of you. he ate it up every time.

"wait." he said as you got to the couch. he walked in front of you, sitting down on the couch. he leaned back, man spreading before patting his lap. "lay." was all he said, eyes staring up at you. you hesitated but did as he asked, laying across his lap. he sighed, hand gripping your calf before moving his hand up your leg. "been so good for me so far. gonna keep being good?" he asked, gripping your thighs, your dress trailing up your body the farther his hand went. he loved your thighs. so much so he one night woke up and decided to fuck into them. pressed them together against your chest, ramming into them. it was hot how much he loved all the parts of your body you had always been insecure or less confident in. when his hands came to your ass, he smoothly slid your panties off and down your legs, tossing them beside him on the couch.

you nodded, throat still pretty sore to speak. but he wasn't going to have that. his hand came down on your ass harshly, your body jerking forward. but his actions after contradicted that, his hand rubbing on the red spot. " words princess. you know I dont like feeling ignored." he whispered, his other hand petting the top of your head soothingly. "y-yes" you croaked out, letting go of the breath you had no idea you were holding onto. " such a shame tho." he mumbled, his hand quickly coming back down harshly onto your ass. a pained whimper fell from you, your eyes squeezing shut, hands gripping the pillow right in front of your face. "you were acting like such a slut earlier. sluts get punished, dont they? especially my pretty little slut." he said, leaning down to your ear while his hand slapped another red spot onto your ass.

John had become a whole new person in the blink of an eye. first the face fucking, now the spanking. what was next? you weren't necessarily scared. but you were anxious. anxious about what he would do to you next. how far he'd take it. you were left in the dark. " teasing me in front of my parents. in public." slap. "bet you wanted me to cum under that table, didnt you?" another harsh slap. he watched how your ass jiggled after each hit, bitting his lip. he himself had no idea what came over him. at all. but he knew that he liked it. in fact, he loved it.

your ass was a bright red, stinging so badly the cold air didnt even help. in a way, it made it worse. tears once again didnt fail to brim your eyes, feeling more and more slaps hit your ass, the same spot each and every time. " P-price please" you cried out. but he was in a trance. he hated it, but deep down loved the way blood began to prickle up from the spot he was abusing. "so pretty.." he whispered, before leaning down, placing a small kiss onto the skin before gently biting the spot. you winced in pain, again digging your nails into the pillow.

he sighed, pulling you up by your waist, your knees digging into his thighs. "lay down baby.. gonna fuck that pretty little cunt." he whispered, holding your hips to help you lay down. once you were comfortable, back on the couch, he rose, pulling his pants off and down his body. his dick sprung out, pre cum leaking onto the floor in drops. you whimpered at the sight, your eyes shooting back up to his. " dont worry baby.. im gonna fuck you." he smirked, practically leaping over you. he leaned back down, lips meeting your slightly wet ones. your face, for the most part, was dry and crusty. but again, he didnt care. he'd been on the battle field with literal guts splattered everywhere. plus, it was his own cum on your face

his lips distracted you from his tip moving up your cunt, collecting all the slick you had. it was embarrassing, how much pain and embarrassment made you wet. you both had a wild side, but there were limits that you both hadn't yet reached, but tonight, he had decided it was time. and its not like you minded and your cunt was proof you didnt.

without warning, his dick pushed into you, a gasp coming from you that broke the kiss. his nose touched yours, his eyes looking down into your wide ones. " I know baby.. just relax. " he whispered, feeling you tighten around his dick. your hands found his shoulders, gripping them firmly as he bottomed out inside you. his forehead connected to yours, a deep sigh leaving him. he wasted little to no time in gripping your legs to wrap them around his waist, your bleeding ass cheek failing to not sting. he pulled out real slow before slamming back into you, going straight in for a faster pace.

your head pressed into the pillow, eyes squeezing shut. " fuck this cunt is so tight. so fucking... good." he groaned, his hands keeping his body up. he looked down, watching his dick slide in and out, the slick from your cunt forming strings. the sounds were sinful, the squelching of your wetness as his dick slammed into you. "j-john.. oh my god~" you whined, back arching up. he smirked down at you, one hand gripping your face. " keep those pretty eyes on me. wanna see your face while I fuck you senseless." he said, his voice deep and smooth like honey.

his tip was quick to hit your womb, the bulge in your stomach not going unnoticed. he moaned at the sight, biting his lip. " look at that. taking this dick so well. such a good slut for me, aren't you?" he cooed, watching it disappear and re appear over and over. you went cross eyes, mouth falling agape at how deep he was hitting into you. it was embarrassing, but you felt your first orgasm of the night hit you like a train. it was coming, and coming fast. he felt the way your cunt pulsed around him, and he chuckled, looking back up at you. "gonna cum already? better hold it. im not done with this little cunt." he said, his right hand going to your throat.

your gasped, hands gripping his wrists as his thrusts only got more and more rough. you couldnt hold back and he knew you couldnt. but he wanted that. he wanted you to cum, just so he could punish you for cumming. his eyes were saying it all, watching you with a small smirk on his lips, mocking you. the way he looked down at you, his thrusts hitting all the right spots in your cunt, you couldnt stop the knot in your stomach from coming loose. he smiled, looking down between you both to watch your cum pour out of you and coat his dick.

" tsk tsk.. being a bad girl again are we?" he chuckled, shaking his head. " I-i couldnt.. help it. im s..sorry" you whined, eyes pleading with his. but he didnt care. again, this is what he wanted. now he could punish you for it.

his hips didnt stop. in fact they sped up. he let go of your throat, that same hand finding your clit. " gonna cum again. and again. until I decide ive had enough of you. since that what you wanted to fucking bad, right?" he asked, watching his thumb play with your throbbing clit. you tried your hardest to pull away, but his other hand held your hips down. " stop fucking running. take what the fuck you deserve for being such a fucking cum slut." he growled, leaning farther over your body to hit deeper into your cunt.

your mouth fell agape once more, your hands digging into his shoulders. he moaned at the feeling, his head falling into your neck. his lips sucked onto your skin, leaving behind big, dark purple and red, bloody marks. his teeth sunk into your skin, feeling his orgasm approaching. " gonna cum in you. you want that, want me to fill you up with my cum? make you a mommy?" he moaned, his thumb still working on your clit. " y-yes.. fuck fill me with it John p..please" you moaned, hands finding the back of his head and running your fingers through his hair.

he moaned into your neck, giving you a few harsh thrust before small, cute little whimpers slipped past him. his cum shot deep into you, his teeth once again sinking into you. you cried out at the pain, the taste of blood dancing along his tongue. and when you though the was done, you felt his hips slamming back into you.

he leaned up off you, blood smeared on his bottom lip. his hair was a mess, bot from your fingers and his head moving against you as he laid into your neck. his hand gripped your calf, pulling it from his waist before holding it up in the air. " thought I was done with you? no baby.. gonna fuck this cunt till you cant even cum anymore." he said, watching you from below.

his thumb went right back to your clit, rubbing small circles that matched his pace. you were sure it was because you just had the strongest orgasm you've had in a bit, but you already felt tired and worn out. it could also be from all the blood Price had managed to draw from you. " c-cant take it." you cried, hands resting on his stomach in hopes to slow him down. but it only fueled him. seeing your poor attempts in stopping him, watching you run from him. " come on princess. take this dick like I know you can. making me so proud." he moaned, head falling back at the feeling of both your warmth and slick coating him.

the room sounded like pure filth, both you guys' moans, the sound of your slick, the skin slapping. it was hot, but also so much for you. it didnt take long for your second orgasm to follow your first one, this one more powerful than the last. " come on baby, cum for me. I know you want to." he smiled from above you, watching how his dick slid back into your cunt with ease and pull back out that much easier. your fingers gripped the ends of the couch cushions, your body jerking forward as another orgasm washed over your body. you chanted his name, legs shaking as you came down from it.

" p...please hold on." you cried out, feeling him continue to fuck into you. he shook his head, growling at you. " didnt I say im not stopping till this cunt cant cum anymore? now shut the fuck up and take it." he growled, his hand landing a slap across your face.

you had to admit, Price was beginning to scare you. it went from just being anxious to being a bit scared of him. he hadn't realized it tho, thinking the look on your expression was just from being so cock drunk. he loved it, watching your blood slide down your neck, pooling in your collar bone. his balls wet with your cum and slick. he felt too good to stop.

" gonna cum again. milking me so goddam good baby." he groaned, his head falling down. you though that this would be the end. that he'd be too tired to keep fucking you. and you were right, kinda.

he shot his last load into you, his body falling forward just a bit at the feeling. he chanted your name, telling you how good your pussy felt, how he wanted to stay in it forever. and when he slid out, you were shocked to immediately feel his fingers sliding in. your back arched, a cry slipping from you. " j-john please I cant" you cried, your legs arching. but he didnt stop. his fingers curled, hitting your g spot each time. his thumb found your clit again, rubbing it in small circles. " sounds so hot baby.. but I know you can. this is what happens to sluts. if you act like on im gonna treat you like one."

again, you began to spasm around his fingers, tears officially puling from your eyes as your stomach cramped up at yet another orgasm. to be honest, John hadn't realized how crazy he was going on you. he didnt know why you teasing him and jerking him off under the table was what set him off. maybe it was because he wanted to match your energy. but he had begun to take it to far when he again, slid his dick back inside your cunt. you were surprised he wasn't just as tired as you were or overstimulated. but he did just give himself a decent break.

" you look so fucked out baby.. are you tired?" he pouted, his hips moving slowly, giving you somewhat of a break. you nodded, wiping your watery eyes. finally, he was going to give you a break and maybe just stop all together. but no. all he did was lean back into your neck, leaving another hickey followed with a bite mark, ramming his hips back into yours. "John please" you cried, shaking your head, pressing your hands to his stomach and shoving him back.

his hand shoved yours off him, his other hand going to your neck. " I said take what I fucking give you, didnt I? stop fucking moving." at this point your pussy was sore, it hurt. you didnt even think you could cum anymore. and the grip on your throat was painful. tears fell from your eyes once you realized you had to use the now word he had promised neither of you would ever have to use. ever.

"s-strawberry.. please strawberry!" you sobbed, hands pressing onto his abdomen. at first he didnt think he heard you right. he slowed down, his face softening. "what?" he looked down at you, watching at the tears ran downpour face. he noticed, really noticed, the bite marks, the hickies covered with blood. he slid out immediately, sitting down and pulling your limp body onto his lap. " im so sorry.. im so so sorry." he whispered, pulling you into his arms.

but you couldnt stop crying. you didnt know if he was being genuine, if he found it hot. you were in the mindset that he was going to just flip you over and fuck you all over. but he didnt. he held you tight, whispering how sorry he was in your ear, how wrong he was for going so overboard. " i.. I broke a promise. and im so sorry my love. I should've listened to you." he said, pulling you off his chest. he wiped the tears from your eyes, his chest hurting as he looked at your red eyes. "please let me take care of you. for real." he said, taking your hand in his.

he stood, holding you in his arms and made his way to the bathroom. "im gonna set you on the toilet for a bit.." he said, sitting you gently. he started the bath before turning back to you, lifting your dress off you. when the bath was full, he helped you inside, watching you settle in. it was silent, kinda awkward. he didnt know what to say other than he was sorry. and he was. he'd never had to do this before, but he knew that he had to take care of you as best he could.

"look up for me princess." he said, cupping your chin softly. he grabbed the washcloth that hung on the rack, wetting it a bit before gently wiping your face. you eyes met his, giving you a small smile. " your so pretty." he mumbled, wiping your chin before dipping the washcloth back in the warm water. "thank you." you said softly, looking down. he continued to wipe your face before moving down to your neck. " this may hurt.. but I promise ill be as gentle as I can." he said before pressing the cloth to your neck.

you winced at the pain, squeezing your eyes shut. " im sorry my love.. just a bit more." he said softly, patting your skin softly. when it was done, he looked at the bloody cloth, sighing, shaking his head to himself. to say he was angry at himself or disappointed, that would be an understatement. he promised himself and you he'd never hurt you. " im so sorry my love.. I dont know what came over me." he said, head hanging low.

you reached over the tub and gripped his hand. " lets just watch movies and cuddle.. maybe even get some tea." you said, voice still hoarse from earlier. he didnt look at you at first, his eyes still stuck to the ground. but when you squeezed his hand again, he looked at you and nodded. " ill take care of you princess. dont you worry."

and he did. the rest of the night he was like your personal little maid. you needed to go pee? dont even think about using your legs, he'd carry you. you wanted the blanket? he'd tuck you in like a burrito. you got too hot? okay he'd take it off. he ordered your favorite food to the house since cooking was not his strong suit, ice cream on the side as well. he felt happy being able to take care of you like he told himself he would always do instead of hurting you.

when you were tired, you curled into his chest, snuggling into him. he looked down and smiled, his hand resting on top of your head. for the first time that night he had let himself cry. well not cry, but a few tears did drop. he was so grateful that you were as forgiving as you were. how even though he hurt you as bad as he did, you still felt safe in his arms, comfortable.

he kissed the top of your head, switched the tv off and laid back. " goodnight princess, I love you so much." he whispered before holding you in his arms, his grip on you never getting loose.

| this was pure fucking filth but like... I love this man so much I can help but right filthy filthy smut about him, also this was for @grqpegrqve |

[itsmarsss]

me reading the chapter actuauly

ogm omfgdsjg; d i cant this is so much blitzo constantly thinking of readers words and them lingering in his mind omg i need them to make up i cannot stand this wht he hell he think that no one will be there to cross out the o but i guarantee reader with her saggy ass and titties (as an old lady) would cross the rings to do so

him hating the weekend sfngdg i canot your depictions of him feel so in character it makes me think you are a writer for the show i cannot believe that this fic is literally changing my life (for the better) ofmfks

SEEING THAT TEY TEXTED CONSISTENLY AND IT MADE HIM NOT HATE WEEKENDS AS MUCHDSG and they made it a habit to spend the weeksends together to hate them less i cannot stnat this omsg my heart

"Maybe it’ll be in one of those days when he’ll be climbing up Stolas’ balcony and then he’ll slip and fall and break all his bones only to be found dead on the grass surrounded by ball gags and anal plugs" this took me out SO BAD lmfao i just stared at my screen like

BUT THEN IMEDDIENYL HAD TO TURN AWAY BC OF THE "PEOPLE I CARE ABOUT FOLDER"

mars when i actch you mars i will fnaf jumpscare you irl this is not it. BABRIE AND HIS MOM WHAT IF I BROKE DOWN??? THEN YOU FOLLOW IT UP WITH "blitz is a 35year old single father who kills people...But in this moment… he just wants his mama." LIKE??? HOW DARE YOU ???? THAT IS SUCH A SORE SPOT BC I FEEL LIKE CRYING EVERYTIME I HEAR AB OLD POPEL MISSING THEIR PARENTS AND IT SLIKE FUGHG crying as i think ab it actually whi cant stand this

then his thought process the whole party omg he literally just wanted an escape to not feel. i cant do this anymore him asking loona to call him dad i crided

then when they leave he pulls out his phone to draw and i jsut sdjfdg i died

NOW FOR THE CONVO WITH STOLAS?? UFHH you probably grabbed it from the many ss of their messages that are shown but still omg his immediate backtracking made me want to pull my hair out bc no thats not how you talk UGHHH

then him asking loona if she would be there when he is old and she is like "ill be there dad" i cant i fucking hate this show why would they do that to me (then he vomits)

literally me after reading blitz portion

FIZZ FIDNING READER OGM he must've felt bad bc he was liek "fuckk that was the chick with blitz and stolas oph shit fuck cock"

reader having no one other than ozzie (in that moment) to go to ufhg (get this woman some friends) and their whole convo what if i

her asking ozzie if he thinks she stupid bc blitz words are echoing in her mind just as much as hers did in his omg i need them to kiss and make up please someone grow communcation skills FUCKING

stolas message with her is so late i cant stand this i think i wills start fcrying again

also her expecting a "fuck you" message from blitz only to get something that made her feel better mars stop this

this is madness when i get you i am shaking you really hard LMFAO

anyways those are my thoughts plz tell my u times this bc idk how long this took

this is the most in-depth comment anyone's ever sent me for my writing and i actually wanna cry

every time you talk about how invested in this you are and how much you love it i feel like crying djmdjmvjfk its just like i cant believe someone would care enough to leave me THIS this is so cool and so fucking nice!!

the thing about how he used to hate weekends because it meant he'd be alone and how he stopped hating them once reader came into his life came from a little blurb thingy i never ended up posting, and i felt it fit right into this chapter!

i liked writing this one a lot because the chaos in blitzos head allowed me to be all over the place and cover a lot of different stuff at once lol it was pretty cool

whenever anyone says something abt my writing being really in character it makes me feel so proud i just get so happy that it feels like ya know im taking these characters people care so much for that they're reading fanfiction about them and writing them from my perception and its so cool to have people feel like im doing them justice!!

the death with the sex toys part was a... choice lmao i thought it'd be funny to use the way blitzo's thoughts are all over the place to convey how easily they go from dumb thoughts to really depressive ones

oh the asking loona to call him dad again was added just to hurt yall i wont make excuses its there to be evil lol

yeah the convo w stolas was mostly taken out of the texts we see in stolas' phone in western energy, but i altered a few things here and there but yeah omfg what always got me with those texts is exactly that. like hes so so desperate to have things be okay he backtracks everything he's trying to say just to not feel that blitz is mad at him

i thought i could also add the layer of blitzo beeing too drunk to reply properly which is another reason for the texts to seem so cold

and ohhh yeah the thing with fizz finding her is that its both a 'fuck what i did hurt this girl' and also that kind of 'idk what to do rn' feeling of interacting with your partner's friends who you're not close enough to to have like a real conversation with lol

yeahhh im glad it was possible to catch that lol the chapter was v blitzo centered so we go through reader's pov of things very wuickly but yeah what blitz said abt her kept echoing in her mind just as much as what she said to him did in his!!

i thought the whole 'expecting a fuck you' thing would be fun to add in considering he does consider sending her a fuck you text in the beginning of the chapter lol

and seriously i think having the doodle there instead of just a description of it made it all so much more motional thank you so so much for it!!! i hope you liked the birthday gift!!!! happy birthday babes!!!!!

[mushywutty]

hiiiii :3 can we have more lore about adel & david highschool au? how did they meet... when did she meet his mama, etc ! ? :3<

UGHHHHHHH!!!!!! CANT HAVE SHIT ( gotta hide shin under my shirt ... )

OK SO WELL UHM!! I MADE A FEW POSTS ABT THEM MEETING N SHIT !!!!!! davids fuckass has to go thru another year cuz he failed his first ( loser ) , THAT is when he meets adel... (( made a doodle where he sits next to her ^_^ ))

they kinda HAVE to get to know each other bc they get partnered up together and adel gets warned that hes a lazy ass bum that doesnt do shit and she might have to do the project by herself ( allegedly. )

she goes awh hell nah and basically FORCES HIS FAILING ASS to work on their project... both to get to meet the family for a while ; mostly bc adel is paranoid as fuck and also doesnt want him to see how dysfunctional her family is .. and david is david hes just dumb and doesnt propose . qHejJEKDKZJDJ SO THEY END UP MEETING AT THE SCHOOLS LIBRARY FOR THAT!!!!!

shenanigans and mayhem ensues and after a few months theyre really close already!!!! david ends up being the first one to meet her family by accident akchually ^_^!!!!

... shes at the store grocery shopping with her parents meanwhile hes getting bread for his mom... sees her in the video game aisle and goes to hit up a dumb conversation and is all giggly until her dad shows up and goes " oh hellO . we are busy , bye . "

then adel gets scolded ( true story btw by ur truly ) for having ' male friends ' 🙄🙄🙄🙄 (( my dad yall omgg. ))

next day at school he straight up goes ' youre dads a jerk wtf ... i was just standing there!!!!! ' ( and since theyre close already bc i said so ) she slowly starts dropping some lore..... then comes the whole post i made abt him randomly telling her hes got a single momma ( after she teased him abt his manners ) ; and errrr id like to think thats when she meets sharon !!!!!!!

I RANTED A LOT HOLY SHITTTTR BUT ERRRRMMM YEAH!! DONT HESITATE TO ASK THIS SHIT I FUCKING LOVE TALKING ANT MY SILLY ASS GOODY AUS!!!! :,)))))!!!

[drabbles-of-writing]

how would your aus be like now that we know more stuff about the show?

oh god there would be sooooooo incredibly many changes. some I'm gonna leave alone unless directly asked but for some main ones atm--

Four Years: oh dear god so many changes. both just from learning more and also from the fact of being an au I came up with when I was 14 and I would never recommend anyone ever be the age of 14, my sincerest apologies to one luz noceda. I could make a whole other post about this but just to keep it simple lets sayyyyyy...first of all, Amity doesn't go into the Emperor's Coven. I personally still like the idea, but it doesnt really fit. theres helping her mom show off to customers, and then theres being forced into a Coven that wants to murder her crush and her crush's adoptive mom. Amity gives me the impressive of someone who would just start biting. Escaping Expulsion was Amity's "standing up to her mom" episode and I love that sm for her, I'm thinking maybe it could be redone in this au to also involve refusing to even consider the Coven? Dunno, but I know Amity doesn't join it, and neither do the twins.

Keene doesn't exist anymore, obviously. we're back on the Hunter show babey and his redemption arc (like most arcs here) take a much longer time to get on with. most remains the same, but he has a lot more interaction with Luz & the gang prior to Eclipse Lake. that episode becomes more of a "we were making so much progress but then the Panic Button hit in and everything collapsed in on itself" and then some tension between the gang of Hunter feeling shitty and not talking, the guys trying to figure out whats with him, and then Hollow Mind comes in an fucks up everything, as per usual

No more angsty fics about Camila missing her daughter because Vee's here now! yaaaaay. but this does mean Camila went a longer time without ever realizing her daughter was someone else, although I imagine at some point she WOULD feel that something was just Off. obviously shes a regular human shes not gonna think a shapeshifter took the place of her daughter, but shes gonna know something is Off and Strange but she cant put her finger on it and Luz seems happy...most of Yesterday's Lie remains the same but since it's at least been two years, maybe three, since Luz has seen her mom, she looks MUCH different than how Vee changed her appearance, so it throws Camila off quite a bit

smaller things will also stay, such as Luz becoming the Owlet and everyone being their own kinda brand of rebel. I'd have to figure out how to slide in Raine, Darius, Eberwolf, etc, somewhere in here. I'll figure it out

Beta: this one stays the most unchanged I think? granted I was updating it slightly more with updates in the show than Four Years. Hunter is still local nephew of principal and Belos's plan still involves killing all witches but its just in the "saving humanity from these evils" instead of "saving humanity from these evils and then going home". still unsure how the grimwalkers would tie into this, if my guy was just continuously making kids or if hes not actually a puritan and just a nasty old guy, and all the other golden guards are Hunter's older brothers? and he was possibly kidnapped when he was a baby or something? that part im the least sure on

Emperor: well, first of all, the duo of Amity & Luz becomes the trio of Amity, Luz & Hunter. none of them get along. Amity is constantly exasperated by Luz and her dumbassery & Luz thinks shes uptight and a tryhard at times. Luz and Hunter are dumbass on dumbass hatecrimes because Luz also thinks hes uptight but also a massive brat who thinks hes better than everyone & Hunter thinks shes annoying as hell and beneath him on every level. Hunter and Amity just take one look at each other, smell the Gifted Child With Parental Issues Trying To Be Perfect In Every Single Way on each other, and immediately drop into offensive hissing cat positions.

Luz and Hunter are the ones who get along first, mostly cause Luz getting brought over to the Emperor's Coven kind of guaranteed she'd run into Hunter first and they'd end up sticking to each other and realize they're massive nerds. Luz and Amity get along next through the power of Luz being stubborn and wlw. Hunter and Amity are last and technically it only really happens because they may be petty and spiteful but they can and will set that aside for one goal: being even pettier and even more spiteful to anyone being mildly annoying to Luz

This AU in particular hasn't had a lot of updates to it so theres a lot of room to work with her. Luz technically becomes friends with Willow and Gus because shes undercover trying to get new recruits (shes terrible at it). this also means that Hunter is more easily converted to the side of Oh Belos Fucking Sucks because he already has adopted sister Luz telling him to Run and her mildly okay girlfriend yoinking him along. course this also means it fucks up Luz even more to see that Hunter is a grimwalker and, per paraphrased word of Belos, she was the favorite. if it came down to it, Belos would've happily let Hunter die, hell, would've even done it on purpose. by virtue of being human, and Hunter being a clone, she was, in fact, given special treatment, and if anything went slightly wrong then Hunter would've died. these kids are fucked up

[water-mellie-seeds]

If you genuinely want to start shit with me about it then you're free to unfollow i genuinely do not care about this stupif petty arguement anymore i exist outside the weird as fuck rules of media consumption on the internet. I want you to know the absolute truth about something. To preface just because this IS the piss on the poor website this is NOT us condoning proshippery or condoning the actions of any less than savory creators or pieces of media we happen to watch or talk about.

We actually quite liked some of the new hazbin hotel and we finally watched and enjoyed helluva boss. And we do still watch south park. And other pieces of media that apparently make you a terrible person for even looking at. For south park I have since i was 9 maybe 10 and it actually helped me to UNLEARN the shitty things i did and thought as a kid in a small town with heavily christian parents. In my very early childhood, my mom used to have basically fucking neo-nazi type ideals thanks to her parents and I had to unlearn all of that on my own because she didn't unlearn it before having kids and 'problematic media' helped. It helped me see what Not to do and what Not to say. And whatever! Sometimes its actually fucking funny and that's fine too! The jokes you have the right to laugh at. And im sick of like. People not getting that you can like something and not everything about it. And im ALSO sick of people dictating whats bad media and whats good media. Why cant we just go back to it being MEDIA. the death of media literacy and the weird holier than thou attitude behind finding a piece of media that has the least amount of controversy is just exhausting. The whole practice is so ridiculously detrimental and im serious. Like 10 odd years ago no one cared what you watched and no one Especially measured your moral standing with a fucking stupid tv show and i don't know when that shift was made but it makes me so genuinely upset because you're not going to find that perfect and pristine show. Everything has something wrong with it. You can acknowledge that and just, move on. It's incredibly easy.

Im not always eloquent as I'd like to be but i feel a lot better coming clean that yeah, Sometimes I find comfort in media that isn't super sweet and sanitized and I owe it to south park and things like it for teaching me how not to act,and especially how some of the things in my life were not normal or okay. However, never would I praise it.

Thank you, i didnt want to keep up some kind of unspoken ohhh i hate those fans lol vibe and confuse people who actually do think like this and who do judge people's morals based on what they consume. So if this is a thing you do and knowing this about us changes how you view us, it is more than okay for you to unfollow or break mutuals,etc. We will be in no way offended.

There's a lil more in tags if u wanna look @ those

Normal posting will resume after i get home from my party!

anons will be off tonight for obvious reasons<3. If you're really aiming to send a death threat though, this is not the case for any of our other blogs so if you're dedicated enough, find em♡ whatever gets you off

[bunnyb34r]

Trying to explain to mom that it doesn't matter what the activity is, I'm gonna feel extreme dread ab it, when it comes to family events

Like it's not that I don't ever wanna leave the house and do anything, I just don't like being around or talking to my family. I feel more comfortable around complete strangers than I do people I grew up with.

Like I'd love to go to a convention again! I miss being able to! In this hypothetical let's say I'm going to one, I'm excited I cant wait, it's all I'm gonna talk ab, but the second one of my family members aside from mom is coming, I automatically do not want to fucking go. It's ruined in my mind. Any excitement I held is now dread and disappointment.

I feel like I can't be myself around any of them bc i feel like if i say one weird thing, i do one annoying thing, or anything remotely memorable, I will never not hear about it. Everyone in the family now knows. They can/will bring it up at any possible moment.

And even things said in complete confidence. Even things that are so innocuous. Nope fuck you, that doesnt belong to you anymore. It's common property now. It's in the public domain.

I fucking hate it.

And I can't even just reject and reject and reject til they get the hint bc one fucking freak in our family was notorious for being antisocial and HOSTILE with their antisociality that if you even begin to show signs of antisocialness, you get accused of being like The Freak. You'll get "joking" questions like "oh you're not turning into [the freak] are you? Haha ;P"

But it's not a joke. They're really asking.

Then the whole family knows. Now everyone is "concerned" and now everyone sees it as their mission to "get you out of your shell"

Like no I just cant stand yall. I hate the weird cult like dynamic our family has, I hate how I'm not allowed to be ME without someone accusing me of being like [the freak]. I hate that I'm not allowed to not like them. I hate that I'm not allowed to have a personality that doesnt match theirs without fearing I'll be made fun of behind my back, even if its "well intentioned/family teasing"

I don't like people coming into my room bc I feel ashamed of how messy it is bc I'm disabled, but all they see is "wow Mar cant keep her room clean. Gotta bring this up to everyone when talking ab rooms/mar/ or cleaning, for eternity. Wow this is so typical of her, remember when she was little and how messy her room always was? HA HA HA HA HA! SO F U N N Y !"

And theyll all say they wont make fun of my room/ that they understand the mess is bc I'm disabled and have a small room with a bed that takes up all of it, but that doesnt fucking matter when it's suddenly a HILARIOUS relatable moment to bring up

I'm just... I want out

[daphnebowen]

season four episode three!

TIMOTHEE HAL CHALAMET BAHAHA M

richard Bowen in a hat is actually the cutest thing I’ve ever seen

RINA CUEEEE

what is ricky wearing on his feet his shoes are… yikes 😬

Awwww!!! Emmy brought muffins for everyone! That’s so sweet!

AWWW GINA LOOKS SO CUTE

“the tension is fierce but also appropriate for all audiences” LMAO WHAT

THEIR CHEMISTRY IS OFF THE CHARTS HOLY CRAP

ricky looks so amazed and tbh so am i

they sound so goooooodddddddd together how can anyone ever compete like tbh I almost like their version better than the og Troy and Gabriella’s

the whole cast is so involved in their song and I am absolutely here for it

“No notes” PREACH CARLOS PREACH

”my boyfriend 😃🥰”

maddox’s smile is so pretty!

STOP IM CRYING IMAGINING GINA AND RICKY SAYING GOODBYE I REALLY CANT DOES SHE KNOW WHAT SHE JUST DID

Ashlyn’s laugh is so awkward omg

me only just now realizing that Jet saying he was in love with the girl playing Elsa (aka Kourtney) could be because of the RCOSL episode where Carlos tells her to pretend to be in love with her for the drama 💀 BUT OMG ITS ALSO TRUE HEHEHEHE

Seb and Carlos fighting is physically hurting me

did Carlos even pay for that coffee or did he just walk away?

”richard, sit. Faster.”

MACK IS NOT TALKING SMACK TO ALYSON FREAKING REED OHHH ITS ABOUTTA GO DOWN

”totally forgettable in every way” not with Kourtney wearing a whole candy shop or something. Seriously why does everyone look semi normal but Kourtney??? Is the the candy land Sharpay or something??

AWWW MADDOX IS SO CUTEEEE

”disasters might be” looks right at Ricky

ricky: repeats Gina’s famous lines. Also Ricky: it’s me *pulls down glasses*

okay but in all honesty why is everyone freaking out about ms darbus leaving especially if Bailey (the character that Gina is playing) is a senior like how does that make sense??? Yes it is sad but I feel like you would get over it…?? I mean obviously it parallels with Ricky and Gina but still

“making sure you don’t fall in love with your costar” “barebones production of Romeo and Juliet” OMG DARBUS REALLY DOES KNOW EVERYTHING

rickys infamous words ! “Wow.”

kourtney: Ricky!!!! Ricky: looks behind him in confusion

“keyboard smash”

”too much sunshine. I found it depressing.” “That tracks for you, actually”

Awh I think Mazzy is a little bit jealous of Mike and Jenns relationship

“like a dog?” He’s so naive what the heck

maddox and Ashlyn flirting while kourt is just standing there awkwardly is absolutely cringe worthy

“security be d*mned!”

jets been there for less than a day, didn’t even see the “can i have this dance” duet, and still somehow knows that Ricky and Gina are “not dating.” Man this boy is the biggest supporter of rina that there ever was

the way mr mazarra just reads silently except for “hmm. Hmm. Hmmm…”

she used two thesaurus’s???

I want one of those Ricky and Gina hugs like COME ON MAN WHY AM I SO SINGLEEEE

omg when Gina said she never gets things right the first time she told him that AFTER him and nini had kissed AND HE STILL REMEMBERS AKDNFJEJHAIWIXNEJSJS I CANT THE PINING IS CRAZY

”secret make out times” YESSS RICKYYYYYY

he has absolute faith in her and her in him and i freaking LOVE IT!

omg miss jennnnnn stoppppppp interferingggg it’s driving me nuts

the tension between Jenn and Benny boo is crazy

AWW KOKO IS SUCH A CUTE NICKNAME!!

yesss Kourtney go get your therapy I’m proud of youuu 😻😻

most of the parents in this show absolutely suck but kourtneys mom is lowkey the best (ninis moms are also pretty cool but Gina’s mom, Ricky’s parents, Todd, and ejs dad all suck)

dani is FLIRTING WITH RICKY BACK AWAY GIRLIE

The look of disappointment on Gina’s face when it was Mack showing up at her trailer instead of it being Ricky :((((

NONONONONO THE WRITING THE NUMBER ON THE HAND IS SO TERRIBLE but also really cute if I actually shipped them

ginas face- girl is absolutely SHOOK

[silentxxsoul]

the 'flu recovery is kicking my ass but at least there's fruity firefighters' reaction dump':

get your flu shot's yall - i did and this is the worst, i cant imagine the flu with no shot

Ooooooh a bobby voice over ???? !!!!!!!!

Oh no, a bobby voice over 😭

Maddie, you worked in a hospital you know better lmao

... Isn't that the inside of maddies first apartment ?

I mean, she brought you her prize

it wouldn't be 911 if there wasn't an over the top ick /fond

the soundtrack this season has been top notch lmao

Poor buck is freezing out here

Did he really just nose goes a foot chase hahahahaa

"this just keep on getting weirder grosser" ftfy buck

oh Denny 😔😭

shes spooked bc trauma karen, trauma with a capital Eva

It sounds like the sponsor is making his goodbyes, and not the 'see you later' kind...

Josh double fisting coffee thermos' is giving me life - someone gif it pleaseee

I'm on team ghost - they owe us after last years tom foolery

ngl that got me jumping too

i mean it was pretty convincing tbh

I can see the look on Chimney's face - he wants that house

Eddie and Hen parent bonding my hearttt

Buck - I'm gonna need to hear more about those dreams. For science.

Girl I'd be moving across the country so fucking fast

Buck maybe don't ask that

Eddie is so done lmao

It's not even her fucking car 🤣💀

i mean s/o to them for being respectful in that situation. i know that irl they would be, but to see it actually portrayed on tv is really nice to see. i mean you had buck stepping further back to let her pass and making a show of putting his hands behind his back so there wasn't a chance she'd perceive him making a move towards her. i dont know if im just reading too much into it, or if it was a conscious decision made by oliver, but i really appreciate it.

The snark between the team is so good this season

Please don't tell me that's --

Oh sweet mother of

Thats freaking tragic holy christ

like I had a feeling after the cross opening but still

that man does not need any more pain

give him a good story line please

It's so great that he has Athena for this, the wisdom and love for Bobby that she has ♥

me too josh, me too

I freaking knew it, Chim is obsessed

but im betting not for buying, but solving that mystery

oh nevermind he's really going for it

does he know that the popularity means people will be at the house constantly

A WHOLE PHONE CONVERSATION WITH MY FAVORITE PEOPLE

???????!!!!!!!!!!!!

Congrats to Buck, I guess?

WAIT

That couple totally killed him

did they do dna yet? what if it wasn't his sponsor but someone that stole his watch in rehab and then crossed the owners and they killed that person? i mean all we have is the watch...

I can't believe we got Eddie playing video games on a phone conference like where's my technophobe bby?

this doesn't feel like a midseason break, tbh

OHHHHHHH Maddie jinxed it on purpose???

The sass with Maddie's eye roll hahahahaahaa

Hen and Karen are the best moms 😭😭😭

I can't stand Chimney lmao 💀

although tbf he did go through all the effort so like, i admire it

I knew this wasn't the end of Denny looking for his parents

pls dont end badly

pleaseeeeee

Eddie crashed on the couch snoring is canon YES

THEN CUT TO BUCK LIKE IM NOT SUPPOSED TO READ INTO THIS

BABY ONESIE ?

MADNEY CLUTCHING THE PAPERS ?!

HENREN SNOOZING LIKE LITTLE CUTIES

Bobby get your wife if you're going to sleuth damnit

WAS THAT BUCK ?!

WTF YOU DROP THAT AND I HAVE TO WAIT UNTIL MARCH

I can't wait for the fanfics to carry me through this hiatus

[lunatic-fandom-space]

Sissi (1955)

This film was pretty cute for the first hour or so and then the last 30-40 minutes were just dread-central for me

It's basically exactly what I would have expected a Sissi-film to be; she's having a good time living at possenhofen with her family when Sophie invites Helene and her mom over to get married to Franz Joseph and they take her along too, but then oops, Franz Joseph meets Elisabeth and likes her way more so they get married instead, the end. Theres some comic relief in the form of a major who briefly thinks that Elisabeth is trying to assassinate Franz Joseph and also the archduke whos like, hard of hearing i guess, and he doesnt understand what people say to him right away. It's pretty subdued though, like, if The King Steps Out (1936) was a light comedy, this is an even lighter comedy.

Atleast it is for that first hour until we get this but at the ball where Sophie was originally going go announce Helene and Franz Joseph's engagement. Elisabeth has been upset this whole time because she's already spent some private time alone with him and fell in love with him, but now that she knows that Helene wants to marry him, she feels really bad and doesnt want to stay in the way of their happiness, so she quickly excuses herself and goes into a smaller room that's connected to the main ballroom. Franz Joseph follows her and asks her like why she's not dancing or something, she tells him that she doesnt want to steal Helene's man from her, he's like "well, we're not married or even engaged yet, so Im not really 'her man' am I" but she's like "no, it doesnt matter, she loves you and she's lucky to marry you, I dont want to get in the way of that" and this joker tells her "eh, actually its not very lucky to marry me. You know, Im always very busy dealing with all this political unrest, and its kind of dangerous being emperor if Im honest, Im sure youve heard of that attempted assassination, and I would hate for Helene to deal with that. but I would love to have YOU at my side anyway :D" Obviously Elisabeth is like "no, please leave me alone"

He does not. Instead he goes up to his mom and tells her that he doesnt want to marry Helene, he wants to marry Elisabeth and asks her if he could please propose to her on his behalf. Sophie begrudgingly agrees and goes into that little room that Elisabeth is hanging out in and talks to her and basically makes it clear what kind of duties await her if she wants to marry the emperor of austria, she's like "I dont want to marry him though, I want to keep being free and true to myself back home" and I forgot what Sophie says after this but it doesnt really matter. Its time for a dance, I forgot what it was called but you need a bouquet for it, so they have to go back into the ballroom and Franz Joseph approaches her with this big tray of red roses (both of their favorite flower) and hes basically like "it would be my honor to ask the love of my life and the future empress of austria for this dance" and obviously she cant just say no to that, especially not in front of all these people, so theyre engaged now. great. Atleast she doesnt have to dance because now its time for the great big firework display that the people of Ischl are putting on in honor of Franz Joseph's birthday and everyone goes outside to watch it. And Elisabeth is just standing there, looking at these beautiful fireworks the way I look at a piece of gum that got stuck to my shoe

Like, during that scene where Sophie talks to her, I was basically just sitting there, head in my hands, going "oh nooooooo this poor girllllllll, get her out of thereeeeee" It filled me with so much dread knowing that its only gonna get worse from here, although obviously I dont know if the other films are actually gonna show that or if theyre just gonna be like "yeah, some more bad stuff happened in her life but she was fine, dont worry about it". And that's not really helped by the fact that the last portion of the movie doesnt have much in the way of jokes, it mostly keeps the same light-hearted tone as the rest but for me, it was very much tainted by that dread I felt knowing like, at least the broad strokes of what happened irl, so that wast pleasant. Another thing that doesnt help is, the film ends with the wedding ceremony and Elisabeth doesnt look happy then either :( like not even a little bit, she looks exactly like she did when she was watching the firework display

But that aside, there is stuff I liked about this film that I would like to talk about as well. I quite liked the humor, there werent really any moments that made me audibly chuckle, but it was pretty charming in its subdued-ness, there was a kind of earnestness there that I appreciated. Also, I know I just went on and on about how much dread I felt during the last section of the movie, but its actually pretty tonally consistant, I think me reacting so strongly was mainly just a me-problem, Im sure plenty of you feel happy watching the wedding ceremony, but I didnt.

The pacing was good, I was really expecting this film to drag on or to atleast feel kinda slow, but it was like an hour and 40 minutes long and I felt like it went by pretty fast, so that was nice.

Of course Romy Schneider as Elisabeth was great, she comes across as so sweet and charming, there's a reason she became so iconic. Karlheinz Böhm was fine as Franz Joseph overall, but I didnt think they had a whole lot of chemistry together, although I think that might just be because their dialogue was very formal and kinda stilted, even during the scenes where they were all alone and not in an "official" setting. The dialogue was pretty annoying in general, anytime two characters talked its like they were painstakingly pulling the answers out of the other character's nose, which made for a bit of a frustrating viewing experience. Also, they would sometimes do a thing that Ive never seen/heard before where they would adress the other person in the third person ?? Like, Franz Joseph would be talking directly to Elisabeth but instead of being like "You're so beautiful" he would say "She's so beautiful" and Sophie does this too when she's interacting with that major. It's pretty interesting but mostly annoying because this does lead to the exact kinds of misunderstandings that you can imagine.

The sets and costuming were very pretty, this is a visually beautiful film, but there's nothing that really stood out to me other than the fact that Elisabeth does wear the iconic white dress with the flowers in her hair and once again, it does not look very good. I mean, the hair was great and I dont even think they actually showed the full dress, I think we just saw the sleeves and bodice, but what I could see of the actual dress wasnt great. I mean, its not as bad as the one in Elisabeth von Österreich (1931) but it does definitely look worse than the one in Ludwig — Glanz und Ende eines Königs (1955) which I completely neglected to mention in my review of that film, but yeah, she wears it during a scene at the opera and it is the best-looking interpretation of that dress so far imo.

All in all, it's okay; a fun, light-hearted romantic film with an aftertaste of dread

Now for the two last things I have to say:

Max and Ludovika were pretty cute together at the end which was a pleasant surprise and I quite liked their relationship in general, even though we didnt see too much of it

Elisabeth and Ludovika look so similar, I thought it was pretty wild but then I looked up the actresses and found out Ludovika was actually played by Romy Schneider's irl mother Magda Schneider, so that's less wild. I will say though, they both look a lot like the woman who played Elisabeth in Ludwig II — Glanz und Ende eines Königs, although that's probably just because they all have more or less the same facial features that were considered attractive in the 50s combined with the fact that theyre all brunettes and Im pretty sure they all have blue eyes as well, so theres that

[the-firebird69]

my mom knew the penalty of me leaving. and did so so i could go to school harvard really is wentworth.

and puot macs down by doing it. and mom wanted it for me. for me to have an education and strived her life my whole time there and yes im achild. to get me just that saw ou work and thinks your all daft but now sees the empie for what it is she says, a real empire. and we are in trouble. she has teaars due to her son seeing thier sacrifice after so long...and it was hard. and he wanted to succeed made mney has it in banks the macs wont let him touch it. are nuts yes.

and is mad but ok. she is aliive her second half too somewhere. and has nope many do not she wil work

and more stories are coming out. bg wept during the show sai i cant stand it. humility love. and we show none. and bg laughed no i do hahah lol have to do it.

and nowsome shall see we did this and macs make us pay and htey had us do it and his familly

Thor Freya

Olympus

and he is sad for them and he. they are so mean. and htey did do it and i was hard. tons say it this is way past it his family bore more..ok left. mb foreve. and cried. hardship and he says it i am the liht and they see. burden and they say it hand him over.

NO NO NO they shout and he says it too

no but good

[teethandclawsxx]

grrrrr bad day vent/rant below

waiting doing literally nothing not even scrolling tumblr for six hours because i was really excited to get to start [show] with [redacted] (no one here) and then finally found out that they actually decided not to HOURS ago bc they dont feel well (fair) but they just forgot to tell me so ive wasted the whole day for Literally nothing, plus the last few hours ive been starving like my stomach hurts and has been growling but i was Waiting so i couldnt go get a snack or whatever and i figured itd be fine cause i could just eat dinner when mom makes it BUT now i found out that she made dinner like 3 hours earlier than usual and supposedly she came and asked if i wanted to eat and i told her i wasnt feeling well but that is a blatant lie because if she said anything at all it was probably from two rooms away (she often does this) and i didnt hear her let alone respond (she probably hallucinated it lol) bc i again wasnt doing anything so no headphones! so i probably would have heard her even if she was on the other side of the house okay. and so i didnt get to eat dinner so fuck me. also dinner is, as per usual, something that will make me really sick, (like. literally she just has to not make tacos spaghetti or pizza. those are the only foods ive asked her not too make too often bc they make me really sick. and yet thats what she makes almost every time she cooks with no breaks for my stomach to recover and its not like we have anything else for me to eat so i just have to eat it and get sick. by the way fun fact from my childhood they used to get mad at me for getting up to go to the bathroom during dinner, but it was because the food was making me sick. those three things literal ly make me so sick i cant even finish eating before i have to run to the toilet. like its that bad and yet does she care? of course not. oh and also i cant find any of my hair bands so i cant even go heat up my stupid fucking taco stuff which is going to be nasty because its reheated AND make me sick because my hair is too long and will get in the food bc its too thick and wont stay out of the way without being tied. and also also i was gonna try to make food ANYWAY but i couldnt even stand for 10 seconds before i was in too much pain like its bad enough that i feel like im about to cry.

[theskyexists]

gundam ep 5 & ep 6 & ep 7 &8

Poor elan, raised a tool, tortured as a child. surprising he wouldnt want aerial for himself if it doesnt hurt him. but he can actually feel the robot as his own body....

i love that jeturk actually came to protect suletta. really like him now tho i dont understand him.

aha he did want it

Suletta is definitely starting to get on my nerves. i know shes just in it for the sleepovers and the boyfriends and whatever it takes to set up a school and not the high stakes intergalactic political game. but like. get with it. stop accepting duels.

hold up hold on, Elan was old enough to accept the role of being a surrogate Elan... i get that it takes the life out of the surrogate, they didnt want to make Elan go through it. i guess...i guess it makes sense.

why wouldnt aerial have thrusters. we SAW that lfrith has thrusters.we know she went flying around on mercury. you’re telling me she couldnt fly there? shes in zero gravity here....we SAW her pick up miorine. wwhat

theyre in outer space. they could blow each other to quick goddamn death here. aerials voice is that of a child....

theres a lot of Nanoha in this. she trounces everybody decidedly and befriends them in doing so. they realise that winning - everything they thought theyd get through winning - that its not actually what they want or need. But that Suletta can give them something else...

IM AN UNDERSTANDING BRIDE. I WILL TOLERATE SOME MINOR TWO-TIMING. i adore the concept of suletta harem anime. but mio is first of course

oh shit. ok they showed quite deliberately. by jeturk getting thrown out. by not-elan getting discarded. that capital does not CARE for fairytale befriending.

it is merciless

MIO DOESNT JUST LET SULETTA INTO THE GREENHOUSE BUT EVEN LETS HER NEAR THE TOMATOES WITH SHEARS

the beautiful and simple metaphor

RED AND BLUE. TRULY BEAUTIFUL DRESSES. OH MY GOD

Nika tries to compliment Mio and she takes it as sarcasm lololol

STAND UP STRAIGHT. their dynamic is so great sfjlkdsjfaksd

why is suletta’s mother trying to make an enemy of mio - why is she letting on shes not fully to be trusted? (or is she trying to teach her a lesson? why say it so evilly tho)

ah. Nika got the thrusters from Shaddiq.

she actually got out of her stutter because of mio’s harsh love haha

wtf. how are they getting out of this one. why did Delling let them go in the first place and why go about accusing her once again of possessing a gundam in public in such a roundabout way. what is stopping him from using his power fully?

ok thats cool. thats a very cool idea by miorine. but everybodys afraid of delling mio

VERY GOOD IDEA BY MIO. VERY GOOD. (it’s not pride, it’s hatred, far more effective lol)

japanese people always seem to think so weirdly from anime. ‘the gundams curse is heavier than you think’ - IT IS JUST A FUCKING MACHINE. A KILLING MACHINE. oh no its pilots die. yeah. so what. why the fuck is that the line. its not MAGIC. you cant just mash ‘witch hunt’ with ‘killer robot’ and be done with the worldbuilding..

Anyway Delling goes in for it lol why. does he care about miorine after all? he set this whole thing up to destroy the gundam and now he’s like ok yeah you can take on the curse then i guess. what.

anyway yeah its definitely better to be ceo of a startup company funded by the whole group including your father (who is only 3% owner!) than be a daughter completely dependent on him. i do not understand why Delling did what he did, why he made Mio a ‘bride’, why he didnt destroy Aerial last time nor why he went along with setting up a company for MAKING GUNDAMS when he already ‘knew’ the pilot dying problem had been solved. what is this man thinking

her mother is completely underestimating what having lied to her daughter and then admitting to it will do to their relationship

so is Mio buying up Peil’s team and shin sei’s to work on gundams based on Aerial and Pharact? Peil and shin sei didn’t even agree. tho i guess suletta’s mom was like: yep sure lets go

even the intro song is kannazuki no miko as heck.

still lying to suletta

‘i didnt come here to build mobile suits’ then why are you at the mobile suit school

IS THIS THE FIRST TIME THEY’VE DEALT WITH THE REALITY OF MOBILE SUITS BEING WEAPONS????

miorine is very smart. suletta is not very smart but has other qualities.

miorine really does have a LOT of freedom of movement right now. yet she hasnt thought to use it at all to get to Earth.

no one but the vanadis group ever thought to use robot tech to save lives? prospera literally has a prosthesis and mio wasnt TOO shocked. how are spacians suriving space right now??

what the fuck lol. who in the world was like: yeah lets leave the billions of investment to the high schoolers to make a silly video with. THE WHOLE GROUP WAS LOOKING TO MAKE WEAPONS AND NOW THEY’RE LIKE HEY LOOK AERIAL IS HERE AND WE”RE GONNA......USE IT TO IMPROVE PEOPLE’S BODIES? there is simply no way to marry the giant robot with developing medical technology.... why do the cyborg parts need an ai....why develop a suit at all? just to please the shareholders? mio is gonna be in the same problems as vanadis

‘Its better than being complicit in war’ YOU ARE AT A MOBILE SUIT ACADEMY. YOU WERE ALWAYS GONNA BE COMPLICIT

hold on. the group just invested 240 million in this startup and now some school regulations are gonna stop the establishment of the company? lol come on

[manifesting-mari]

Morning Pages 1/26/2023

After my morning meditation and prayers I do some reading from different books. Just like a section or a paragraph or an entry depending on the book. One book that is part of my morning routine is my friend David’s book ‘Healing Heals the Healer Too’. with that book i randomly open up to a page and read whatever passage is there. For the past few times ive been doing this exercise with this book the same passage come up. Its a passage about  an Aya experience he had. The way he describes his experience reminds me of an experience i’ve had while on San Pedro. The feeling of having to choose between you Mother’s happiness and your own and then feeling split. And then the experience of feeling the different iterations of yourself coming into your body and then you mourning for the past yous that experienced the sadness and pain. And also the experience of feeling the part of you thats just behind you coming into your body. 

When I was a baby I died. The night I was born i flat lined due to a valve that was not closing properly. I had to get an emergency operation that saved my life. During my San Pedro experience i saw myself as a baby, no longer breathing. And then i saw my mother standing over me screaming and crying. I felt so bad that I decided to go back into my body. And that cycle has manifested itself over an dover again in my life. Living 2 lives. One where i am expressing myself in secret, and another when i am showing up for my mom the way shse wants me to. Because of the life experiences i had, i eventually rebelled ( as teens and 20 year olds naturally do) and I started living the life that my mom taught me was “bad”. There was some level of perspective that I had that I felt my mother didnt. She viewed her life in fear. I was numb to that fear. Whenever i would feel it i would use it to fuel whatever crazy decision I was about to do. Part fo me thinks i feel like i deserved to be afraid because i was doing something that “wasnt allowed” (drugs or sex or rock and roll). Now i’m trying to integrate those parts of me into a whole person and decide whats really me and what was a over exaggeration of what i truly wanted which was freedom and autonomy. 

Now more so than ever i can easily jump into the past versions of myself and feel that energy. I was experiencing that the other day when jordan was over. I was talking about past friendships and there was a certain attitude that was coming out, it was this back that i felt, that would keep me protected from people hurting me. A more aggressive attitude that had stank and sass. It was a part of me that I kind of looked up to and enjoyed, but i could see the part of that ego that was punitive and unforgiving. I’d liek to get to know those parts of me better. I can also see the pattern of friendships that eventually went south. I think it was my own hurt and judgements that prevented me from being truly openhearted, which i forgive myself for. I forgive myself for not being able to hold space in my heart for people who hurt me. Its a hard thing to do and no one is requiring me to do that. I want to be able to hold space for those who have hurt me but i know i must allow myself to do my own individual healing. I cant force forgiveness if im not ready for it, even with myself. 

I can see and feel the past versions of myself that still feel shame, regret and guilt and they are much softer than they used to be. They have relaxed more and they can feel the love and compassion thats there for them. And being able to hold space for those feelings in myself helps me hold space for that feeling in others. “Forgiveness is tricky” Trudy says in the midnight gospel, and it is. Its hard to forgive someone for the pain they inflicted on your when youre still healing from it. Its hard to forgive yourself from the pain you inflicted on someone else when youre still feeling it. Hurt people hurt people they say. I know i hurt other because it is the perpetuation of that pain. It is projection most for me personally. Its pain that i do not choose to feel so i transfer it onto someone else. 

I think thats the process i’m, in now. I keep thinking of what Jordan tells me “theyre your feelings and your allowed ot have them” I appreciate that because for the longest time I’ve denied my feelings and am just now starting to allow my feelings to be mine. But they are mine, not anyone else’s feelings, and i see the ways where i want other people to feel what i feel because i can very easily feel what others feel. And then i get angry when others dont feel what i feel. David said my blind spot if that i cant empathize with those who dont empathize and i definitely feel that very clearly. I very much value my friendships with other people who are more experienced and practiced in their empathy. I value those friendships because i value that quality within myself. When people are unable to feel what i feel or just even recognize that im having a different experience from them i get upset. I also can admit that i get upset when other people dont feel what i feel. I can see how thats a side effect from growing up with my parents. My dad screaming at my mom “you have no idea how i even feel” and they didn’t. They did not empathize and try to understand one another. 

I want to be able to be in relationship with people where i have my feelings and i dont expect or get resentful when other peopl cant hold my feelings the way i do. And if i need help holding feelings i and grateful that i have people in my life who can help me hold my feelings and can meet me where i’m at. I know i get upset becaus ei’m still upset with myself for the ways i’ve denied my own feelings and my own experiences and im giving myself more compassion for that. I understand that i was so much in my shit that showing up for someone else was not an option. I had to show up for myself first and also as for help in order to process what i’m going through. Its like when you have a broken leg, it would be difficult for you to off to take care of someone else’s kid. Allow your leg to heal, get the help you need, and when youre better you can help others. 

I am someone who enjoys showing up for others. I see the ways where i get validation from that. Last night i was thinking of the ways where i do enjoy fear and pain. Or was i thinking fo that this morning. Well i was thinking of it at some point. I was thinking of how i kind of liked the fear and the excitement and how i need to find healthy outlets for that. 

I have a consensual non-consent fantasy where my partner get angry with me and then pushes me around and spanks me and hold me and and throws me around and has rough sex with me. I want to play that out. I dont know why.  Theres something about being choked thats scary for me and thats the hot part. Liek i want someone to choke me with confidence. I can tell when someone is choking me and theyre afraid to hurt me. Damn. i think i need to dive back into the lifestyle because i can tell these are these weird subconscious parts of me that want to be played out. Like the whole victim and oppressor shit. I didnt realize the ways i was playing that out subconsciously. 

I’m happy that im so much more aware now than i ever was before. I am very aware of the pain that i keep stored inside me. Not how much pain, just knowing that i hold onto it. That i enjoy it. I think its stored in my sacral. The pain of belonging. And i got hit when i was a kid because i was doing something that wasnt conforming. I had to conform and in order for me to conform my parents hit me. My parents put fear and pain inside my body so i knew that feeling pain and fear meant that i was doing something wrong. That i was bad. All of that morphed into this weird thing where i still craved that fear and wanting to be bad, so i would act out certain scenarios in my life to instill that fear and that “bad” feeling, usually instrumentalizing someone else. 

I dont wanna play with people anymore and i dont wanna play myself. I want to be honest and aware of whats happening. I wanna understand what part of me wants to be played out in these scenarios and what its trying to relieve. I’m a big fan of playing out your feelings, allowing them to be expressed in a healthy way. Im very grateful to bein situations where i can now openly speak about my feelings and also ask for space and ask for the support i need. I didnt feel like i had that in my 20’s and the bdsm world served as an introduction to speaking your truth. I didnt get it totally perfect because i was still not in communication with myself. I was still denying the pain i was experiencing and using sex as an outlet. 

I’ve always thought there was some kind of kinky sex demon with me. That would use me to release and express. Maybe thats the demon that scratched me when i was younger part of me wants to dig deeper and talk to him, but part of me is scared. IDk what i’m scared of. Idk if i’m scared of seeing a demon and talking to it. Or if im scared that there is no demon at all and the darkness is really just me.

[letterstomymothershewontread]

sister,

so it's coming up on a full year since the last time we spoke. it was over text about a post i shared on my facebook, a petty post albeit but it got your attention anyway. i shared a post of defining what a sister is and i tagged my two best friends in it. one of those friends i've been friends with for 21 years this year and the other 17. i've known them longer than i haven't and frankly i dont know where id be without them. you texted me saying that you had been thinking about me and sometimes you look at my facebook when you're missing me, and this time you saw a post that pulled on your heartstrings. a heart i'm not so sure you have anymore if i was to be honest. i tagged my best friends in it and said they were my only sisters and you texted me over it. you asked if that was how i felt and i told you it was. i mean if it wasn't i wouldn't have shared it. i may shitpost a lot but everything i share and post is a representation of me in some way, you know that. looking back at the texts i see now how short of a conversation it really was, ten texts in total. it's funny you know, when you first texted me you started the text out saying you were wanting my opinion on some of your wedding things. i think that really goes to show how you never take me seriously and you never have. i think that's the problem with you and mom if i'm honest, you still both see me as some angsty emo 15 year old, and i'm not, i'm an adult. i will use my voice to speak up for myself, after all i had to learn how to protect myself really early on in life. you go on to ask me about the post in that first text, to which i replied saying that as far as i was concerned that it's her wedding that she didn't want me to be apart of from the beginning. i tell you that yes i do agree that they're the only people i consider my sisters because they've been there for me like a sister is. both of them know and understand me better than anyone apart of my fiancé. id like to think that she also knew me that well or at least did but clearly doesn't anymore and i don't know her as well as i thought either. isn't it funny how you can talk to someone literally everyday and you still don't know them? i told you the night that we got into this big fight i wasn't going to be in your wedding and i made it VERY cleat by also leaving all of the wedding related group chats; yet you still say in your next text that you did want me in your wedding and you'd still like for me to be, but after this you don't think i should be. it all comes back to the fact that you never listen to me or take me seriously. you tell me that you still want me there and you asked for my address so you could send a invitation. you continue and tell me that you wanted time to figure everything out and process your feelings. you say you still haven't fully figured them out but you do know that you miss me. at this point i'm filled with frustration and anger and overall feeling so fucking hurt. it just continues this feeling i've had for my whole life. the feeling that i am underwater and i am screaming and shouting for someone to hear me, to listen to my words. i cant ever catch my breath and my words go unheard and unnoticed, after all i was to be seen not heard and even then, i was to be seen rarely. i reluctantly reply to your text because i know that you're not going to stop until we finish this conversation which, i know is going to go absolutely nowhere. i reply and give you my address because who knows maybe ill turn up at the wedding and it'll be like a movie where i'm the villain, as i always am and, ill stand up and object to the wedding. mom stands up and jerks me out of the wedding and its a whole scene. i know that wont happen though because as much as i would love to be that bitch, i couldn't do that to you. i continue to tell you that i was glad that you took your time seeing as how you always think of yourself and never consider anyone else's feelings.

i tell you to send the invitation but to not hold your breath on an RSVP from me. i didn't know then why you bothered to reach out to me or why you say you miss me, especially because the last time we spoke you flew off the handle. i will say i know i also didn't keep my cool but i tried so damn hard not to explode. i have had to try my whole goddamn life to be sure i don't just explode with anger at the slightest inconvenience. at least not to be the first one to go off because if i was well, it's what everyone ever expects of me. you were always the 'left brain' and me the 'right'. you used logic and strategy where i was the creative and emotional side. i was the heart and you were the brain. everyone just expects me to be overly emotional and to constantly overreact to everything. looking back i more often than not wasn't overreacting just expressing it in a ineffective way. during this entire fight i tried my very very best to keep a grip on my emotions and my words. you replied to my text saying that yes you were putting yourself first with the tone and implication that you've never put yourself first. you then thank me for giving you my address, i scoff. you tell me that i maybe right that you don't miss me but rather the connection we had, but you're not sure. i tell you how putting yourself first and just being plain selfish are two entirely different things and unfortunately you're weren't leaning towards the latter. i continue by telling you how you've refused the whole time to see anything from any other perspective and you've lacked any kind of empathy. i had been starting to put myself first through 2021 and 2022 yet i was still empathetic. i tell you to just do what's best for you that the next time you reach out i'm not guaranteeing ill look at the message. you reply with the most confusing message you had sent so far. you used my words that i had been telling you over the last month anytime we had spoke, well lets call it what it is fought. it always started out civil enough until one of said something that inevitably caused the other to blow up. i will say that's the one sisterly thing you've always done, pushed my buttons because, like a sister you knew all of them; as did i. you tell me that you don't think you can help me if that's what i want from you. honestly i don't know what you're talking about because never once had i said i wanted anything from you other than for you to let me have my peace. you continue to say that you don't think i was empathetic to you at all and that i seemed more hostile than anything. at this point i could've burned down a building with how i was going to explode. honestly looking back with almost a years worth of growth, i'm just as angry now as i was then. i am so goddamn sick of always being painted as the villain or the bad guy just because i speak my mind and i express my feelings. i mean for fucks sake it's the whole thing i was in therapy for; to learn how to express my emotions in a healthy way. rather than harming myself and my body, i should express my thoughts and emotions with words. you continue to take my words and use them against me saying and i quote "but, like we've said over and over, i don't think there is a solution for this." see the thing is sissy, i had been telling you that since november of 2021 when this whole thing started. i reply with the last thing said between us since then. i tell you that i think it all could've been avoided had you been empathetic from the beginning but it is what it is at this point. i told you i was tired of getting a text from you every few weeks like an ex that hits you with the "i miss you. we should try this again." and that was that.

so now it's almost a full year later since that conversation and it still lights my skin ablaze with anger and hurt. see the thing i think that hurts me the most is that prior to this conversation we had a phone call about a week before thanksgiving trying to come to some kind of conclusion. i called you when i left work that night and we talked while i drove. it was raining that night and i was driving moms car because i was trying to get the insurance figured out from the guy who hit me a month prior in september. i was driving from the next town over to my future in-laws house. you were aware of that so you knew id be driving for about 45 minuets and you were aware of the conditions and you knew that i wouldn't be able to get emotional while we spoke. the entire time we were on the phone your then fiancé, now husband was there and would butt in every now and then. i didn't say anything even though it pissed me off that i couldn't just talk to you since this was between us. i will say thought as to how telling it is about your priorities and your husbands true colors. i mean all of this started because he got his feelings hurt and nobody decided to tell me until a year or so later so all i could do was apologize and promise to be better going forward. instead that wasn't enough for either of y'all. it's like you wanted me to go back in time and completely undo everything but, we both know thats impossible. i get to my fiancé's parents house and i then sit in moms car in the drive was for about thirty more minuets and my fiancé is stood outside of the car listening in but not speaking, unlike yours. it was during this point in the conversation that you said something that still to this day bothers me. you tell me that we don't really know one another anymore that we hadn't lived together in years. i scoff and remind you that we may not have been living together but we have spoke every single day for the last year. on top of that we never lost contact or anything so even when it wasn't a steady flow of conversation everyday we still spoke often enough that you knew me. i was always open and honest with you about things after all, you had been the person i went to for about anything for the longest time. i guess that was just one-sided then.

i have never really been open and honest about any kind of my feelings. i've always repressed, bottles up, and suppressed any of my emotions or feelings. i mean thats the whole reason i spent years of my life either cutting my wrists and thighs, or starving myself then throwing up whatever i ate. i hated myself and i felt so alone that honestly there was no point for me to be around anyway, i mean nobody wanted to hear a peep from me no less see me. that being said i have tried harder than ever the last almost five years to not bottle everything up. the reason? i finally have a person in my life that actually gives a fuck about me. i don't feel like you're the only person i could turn to about my demons. with that also came the fact that i was working on my communication skills as well as how to properly process my feelings. i still spoke with you frequently through out those times, well up until the last two, which means you've seen my progress. my point is sissy, you knew me. you knew me better than even my partner, after all you had watched my grow and change and, you were present for all of it. to know that you weren't comfortable with me like i was with you honestly still hurts. i considered you my best friend as well as my sister.

i may have been the person to be hurt directly by your words and actions, but you fail to see the other person you hurt too. my partner also loved you like you were their sister. you had been there for our whole relationship. we all hung out the three of us, often the four of us when your husband, then fiancé, could tag along. we played D&D together, went to conventions together, we both were there when your husband proposed. you and your husband were the only two people i had there when i proposed to my fiancé. i shared that very intimate moment with you and your husband. only to later find out that when my partner looked up at you two when i was on one knee, you and your husband looked like you didn't want to be there. you and your husband spent the entire night bickering and being passive aggressive towards one another. when i asked you about it, the reason that you guys were going back and fourth was because you hadn't had sex with your partner. you didn't want to nor did you have the time and he was unhappy about it. i mean it's not entirely my business but i mean if there was ever a red flag, it was that. all this to say that you also hurt my fiancé when this all happened. they told me months after the last text conversation we had, that they finally felt like they had a sister; and much like their brother, they were ripped away.

i do hope you think or me and i hope that you regret the things you said. i hope it eats at you inside. i hope on your wedding day that you still felt a tinge of grief. i know i do. every single day i grieve the death of people who aren't dead and, it all started with you. i miss you everyday but i know it's not you i miss. i miss the fun times we had and the connection we had, to put it like you. if you ever find this just know i think the blame for all of this is 50/50 but, i can never forgive you. you hurt more than me and i won't let someone near them that can hurt them.

-sincerely, your annoying younger sibling.

[eddieshellfxre]

Arcadia

Eddie Munson x reader

word count: 2.2k

Summary: you come down from the big city to spend your summer holiday in Hawkins with your family. You meet Eddie and things start going somewhere

content: slight flirt, extremely soft smut

a/n i just felt like writting something today, its not as good as i want it to be but i still hope you like it. let me know if i should continue to do a part 2

1986

Summer begins and you decide to visit your cousins Mike and Nancy for the holidays in Hawkins. You havent been here in ages, but you missed all the fun you used to have here. Hawkins would be the perfect escape for the summer, an escape from all the problema you had going on.

Nancy is the one picks you up from the airport, and as soon as you walk out the doors there she is, with the biggest smile on her face. Nancy is your favorite cousin, shes your age and you always connected like you were best friends.

“y/n” Nancy says smiling and arms wide open ready to hug you. You drop your luggage and run to her

“Nance!!!! oh my how ive missed you” you embrace each other in a tight hug “how are you? thank you for picking me up”

“im going great! its no problem. Mom and Dad are so excited to see you” you pick up your luggage from the floor and make your way to the car “we just gotta make a little stop on the way home. I need to go and pick up Mike from the arcade” she says rolling her eyes

“its no problem, im excited to see Mike. I bet hes all grown up”

Nancy looks at you with a unamused look and looks back at the road “yeah only in size” you laugh at her remark and smack her arm. The car ride wasnt long, but it was enough so you could catch up about the last 3 years.

You arrive at the arcade and Nancy beeps twice so Mike knows she has arrived. You look at the door anxious to see your cousin all grown up. Mike swings the door open as soon as he sees you

“Y/N AHHHHHH” he runs to you hugging you tight “i cant believe youre really here!!! youre staying the whole summer right? you have to, there are so many cool things i have to show you!! like the arcade, the mall omg!! the mall” Mike is way too excited and doesnt shut up for a bit.

Behind Mike you see a tall figure, long hair, denim vest and ripped jeans coming towards you. You question yourself who could that be, even though you were intrigued you knew it was trouble. He looks at you with a small smile on his face and places a hand on Mikes shoulder

“Hello” he says looking at you not breakinf eye contact “you must be Mike’s older cousin!” the way he talks and smiles give you the butterfly effect on your belly.

Mike is all smiles at this point and decides to introduce his friend to you but he’s cut off “this is Edward Munson. But everyone just calls him-“

“Eddie, you can call me Eddie” he picks up you hand and places a kiss on it in sort of a ironic way. He really didnt seem like the lovey dovey kind of guy and you didnt mind. Face still near your hand he looks up walking closer to your face “and i know youre Mike’s cousin but i still haven been properly introduced” you swallow dry of how close hes standing next to you right now

You part your lips to introduce yourself, you hear your name being screamed at from a far. Behind Eddie you see Dustin running to you screaming your name. You have always liked Dustin, he was the sweetest boy ever, you looked to him like a younger brother. Dustin pushes Eddie to the side and hugs you “Dustinnnnnn” you say squeezing him tight “hows my favorite Hawkins boy?” Dustin looks at you with the biggest smile plastered on his face.

You look over at Eddie and hes got the most confused face ever “I guess you got what my name was” you say laughing “you look confused are you alright”

Eddie looks at Dustin and back at you “Yeah im alright, i just didnt know Dustin knew you so well”

Dustin looks at Eddie placing his hand on his chest looking offended “so well? shes like a sister to me, i-“ Dustin cuts himself off and starting to look at you and Eddie, a smile appears on his face and you could have sworn if this was a cartoon a lightbulb would have appeared at the top of his head “y/n youve met Eddie…. why dont you come see us play at our d&d campaign! Eddie is the president of our Hellfire Club” Hellfire Club? D&D? I mean I might not be interested in the game but….

“Sure why not, I’ve seen you kids play for years. You dont mind do you Nance?” Nancy tries to hide the smile that shes forming by shaking her head. You say your goodbyes and sit back in the front seat ready to go home, you roll down the window and Eddie walks closer to it placing a hand on the roof of the car lowering his head down to meet you “well, i guess this is goodbye then” Hes so close you can smell the cigarette and old musky cologne mixed together. You know you just met but Eddie is already making you feel some type of way.

Eddie looks down at your eyes and down at your lips and says “no, i dont think so” Nancy drives off laughing like a maniac, you keep looking over at her and back at the road rolling your eyes. You knew what she was thinking, you knew her way too well not to know. Mike talks the whole ride home, telling you about his girlfriend El and all the fun things they’d do with their friends but all you could think of is Eddie.

You arrive home, the Wheeler residence. How you’ve missed this! You walk in and auntie Karen is already preparing dinner. You silently walk behind her and hug her from behind whispering “smells great” she jumps up hugging you “ive missed auntie, i cant believe im here again”

She breaks the hug looking with a straight face at you “again…. it took you long enough to come back” she looses the firm look and breaks into a smile “you are so grown up, look at how beautiful you look” she spins you around laughing “go get ready for dinner its almost done”

You walk up the stairs to the guest bedroom with your luggage to start unpacking. You hear a knock at the door and open up to find Nancy on the other side. She walks in and starts to help you unpack your bags. Some time goes buy and Nancy is oddly quiet just smiling. it peaks your interest so you decide to break the silence and ask “who got you smiling like that? You thinking about Jonathan?” you joke around. Nancy looks up at you and shakes her head “Not Jonathan?? Then who— Nancyyyyyy again? Don’t tell me its Steve” Nancy remains quiet and begins to smile again. You throw your hand up in the air and start shaking your head “Nancy, listen to me its not gonna go down well, look at what happened last time” Nancy parts her lips to start talking but is cut off buy auntie Karen’s calling downstairs “saved by your mom” you point out.

At the dinner table you hear the phone ring, Mike gets up to get it, you dont really understand what hes saying because hes almost whispering but you figure out its probably his girlfriend calling from California. Mike ends the calls and sits back down at the table looking stressed

“Honey whats wrong? Is it El?” auntie Karen says

“Nnnn- Yes, it was, she ermmmm she cant come to Hawkins during the summer break. Yeah its a bummer” Mike wasnt the best lier in the world and you could tell this was a lie. The door bell rings and he freezes “I’LL GO” and storms off to open the door

Moments later Mike walks in the dining room with Eddie behind him. You drop your jaw as soon as you understand everything thats going on, you look over at Nancy and know exactly shes thinking the same as you

Eddie greats everyone with a wave “So sorry for arriving late Karen, Mike invited me but must have forgotten to say anything about it” Mike looks panicked eating his spaghetti.

“Eddie sweetheart its no problem at all, here have a plate and sit there next to y/n” oh just great “Eddie have you met y/n? shes my sister’s daughter”

He looks at you smiling while sitting down next to you “oh ive had the pleasure Karen, thank you” he leans to your side and bit and whispers “hi again” You respond with a shy smile, Eddie laughs and begins to eat.

Dinner is over and you walk outside to the garden and sit wrapped up in a blanket looking at the stars, something you dont see often in New York. The back door opens and Eddie walks out “hey… whats a girl like you doing alone in a place like this” he laughs walking closer to you “can i sit down next to you” you nod your head and he sits close to you

“you want a bit of the blanket? its big enough for both” you open up the blanket and wrap it around Eddie too “soooo…. whats it about you Eddie?” he turns to you confused “tell me about you”

“theres not really much to tell you. i live with my uncle, i been stuck in school for god knows how long” he laughs trying to find something in his pocket “i also play in a band” you look at him interested “i play guitar. my band is called Corroded Coffin…. you should come see us play sometime. We dont usually have a pretty crowd or a crowd at all for that matter except the drunks…. but if you went we’d have a pretty crowd at least” his voice cracks a bit looking down. You smile at him, you can feel something in the air not sure what but its something, you feel nervous around Eddie, butterflies pop out of nowhere. He pulls something out of his denim best between his ring and index finger, you notice his rings shinning as the light from inside the house hits ir ever so slightly “you smoke?” you nod your head, “i must warn you, this is the good stuff. Ain’t nothing like the shit you have up in the big city” he laughs, you place the blunt between your lips and Eddie lights it up for you, his face near your face looking at your lips while you suck in the substance.

You pass it on to Eddie as he takes it between his fingers he looks down “holy fuck” he breaths out “youre making it really hard for me”

“im not doing anything at all im just here”

“exactly” you turn to each other and he places his thumb on your chin pulling your face closer to his he kisses you, soft at first. This is what was in the air, this tension. Sexual! You want him to take you right there right now “why do you drive me crazy like this” you shrug your shoulders as pulls you by the waist suggesting you go on his lap “come here” he breaths out, you sit on his lap, re-arranging the hair around his face, you lean in to kiss him, his hands gripping onto your hips. You grind your hips on his jeans creating friction, Eddie’s breath cracks as he feels himself getting tighter in his jeans “fuck— i really dont wanna”

“y/n” you hear your aunt’s voice calling you from inside the house. You jump off Eddie’s lap and stand in front of him scared your aunt would see you

“i gotta— i gotta go Eddie” You say worried that you were gonna get caught by someone. Eddie grunts out weakly, begging you to stay a while longer. You kiss him one last time, you feel his hands drift down your lower back stopping at your hips “Ed- i really gotta go” you pull away from him. “Im coming auntie Karen” you shout from the backyard

“oh i wish you were” Eddie says folding the blanket and handing it over to you. You smack his arm playfully “good thing its the whole summer right? I dont enjoy leaving things unfinished” he winks at you and your cheeks turn red. You walk Eddie over to the front door, he turns around leaning on the door frame, fingers playing with the pins on his vest “got plans for tomorrow? i was thinking we could go somewhere…. after hellfire club. Youre coming to hellfire right?”

you nod your head “if you’ll have me ill go. and sure im down for anything” you lean in to kiss his cheek goodbye and notice he tries to turn his head to meet your lips. “goodnight Eddie”

“Goodnight y/n” Eddie turns around and walks to his van. you close the door behind him and turn around and find Nancy at the top of the stairs, arms crossed with a look of irony in her face. You look at her and give her a fake smile and walk uo the stair

“have fun babe?” Nancy says putting her hand on your shoulder “need a ride tomorrow to hellfire?”

“oh shut up” you laugh “hes a fun guy what do you want me to say. i find him intriguing” you throw your hands up “im gonna go to bed im pretty tired”

“ohhhhhhh i bet you are. Goodnight y/n” Nancy mocks, imitating Eddie’s tone.

You walk into your room and close the door. Still confused at what happened, not understanding why or how this guys got you feeling like this but you liked it, its new and its exciting.