#slightest bit of romance
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Building Home - A Destiny Trio Fic for Kairi Day
https://archiveofourown.org/works/62454826
Summary: So, either when we saw young Xehanort on Destiny Islands at the end of KHUX or beginning of Dark Road (I forget which it was), they showed the paopu tree, but it somehow looked like the tree was backwards to me and maybe a few others on Tumblr when I brought it up. BlueRosesBurnBlue was able to show me that that wasn't the case, but I decided to write a story about that whole thing here for Kairi Day.
What if Sora got a picture of Destiny Islands' past--through the phones from TWEWY that can take pictures of the past, via one Sanae Hanekoma--and he became convinced that Xehanort had flipped their beloved paopu tree for nefarious reasons, and that they needed to figure this out? And what if there was more to Sora becoming so adamant about this than just in need of figuring out that question?
@bluerosesburnblue
Kairi's PoV
"I don't know about this theory of yours…" Riku was the first to bring up the obvious, as the three of them stood standing in the secret place and he stared at a strange picture of their beloved paopu tree that somehow seemed to be flipped (Kairi still wasn't sure how Sora had gotten his hands on this photo).
And a part of her was definitely glad that Riku had said what he had, because ninety percent of her thought that there was nothing to Sora's theory, while maybe a ten percent did because of Sora's far too good convincing story skills (even if most of it was silly). That was why she hadn't spoken up herself yet.
"Riku, the paopu tree, from years ago, somehow looks like it's going in the opposite direction!" exclaimed Sora.
"Yeah, I'm seeing that," deadpanned Riku, clearly not impressed (though Kairi sympathized with Sora here. It was hard whenever Riku used that tone with someone), though to his credit, he was still very much examining the evidence. "So?"
"'So?' Who do we know who lived here before and messed with our destinies?! Xehanort! He must have altered the tree to somehow change stuff about us… or at least our Play Island. For some reason. We know he time traveled!"
"Yeah, but how would changing the tree on the island—and I'm not even sure that's possible—affect us?" Kairi finally spoke up. "Could-could the picture be wrong somehow?" Kairi had to ponder, though she hated that she felt like she was betraying Sora in doing so. But Riku mouthed a small "thank you" her way as soon as she had done so.
"Oh, c'mon, guys," Sora said with a roll of his eyes. "Master Yen Sid said Xehanort was one of the best Keyblade Masters in the world: one who clearly knew way too much magic—including time travel!—who loved messing with our fates! How wouldn't he find a way to use changing the palm tree against us?"
"What, do you think him swapping the island might have swapped who we are?" inquired Kairi.
"Yeah!" Sora nodded enthusiastically, even going as far as to grab both of Kairi's hands in his own, now that she seemed to be humoring him a bit now. She could just imagine Riku rolling his eyes in the background. "Like, maybe instead of you hitting really hard like you do—and somewhat recklessly throwing yourself into things. Ehehe—you were originally more of a glass cannon like Aqua. And I… well, I guess maybe I could have held the Keyblade differently, than like a baseball bat? Maybe I even used a shield like Goofy. And Riku-"
"Wasn't so graceful, but the tank of our group?" Riku finished Sora's thought—as the trio took that moment to all take a seat in the secret place, upon realizing that this wasn't going to be the short conversation they had maybe assumed it would be when Sora had flagged them down in the hot heat, and that they had better sit down and hash this all out. "Those are some… pretty detailed and specific guesses, Sora. And again, with no proof. I mean, hey. Don't get me wrong. If Xehanort actually did some wrongdoing here and we can correct it without radically changing our lives, I'm all for it. But Sora, until you can prove that… I feel like you're on a crazy ride with this, my guy."
"Are there any spells we could use to try and figure any of this out?" Kairi suggested, because as amazing as her training with Aqua, and recent journeys, had been, she knew that there were still things in certain worlds that Sora and Riku had seen that she hadn't.
"Yeah, there's an unveil spell that Sora and I have both learned," Riku finally relented. "But why don't we go see Master Yen Sid and see if there are any stronger variations of it that he knows of. Or, if nothing else, if he can do the spell for us, so we don't mess it up."
"Yes, sir!" Sora grinned. And both Kairi and Riku had to chuckle at his cute reaction.
And so, with their plans set, they all three headed towards Sora's gummi ship to make their way to the Mysterious Tower.
…
It was when Kairi was writing in her diary, as she waited for the gummi ship to hopefully get all three of them to the Tower on autopilot (as Sora seemed very keen on chatting), that Kairi found herself very curious about why Sora was so gung-ho about all of this. "But why do you want to know so badly about this, Sora? I hate to say it… but isn't sometimes a “no” answer the better one? What if we find out something we can never forget? Like without Xehanort's meddling, that the three of us would have never been friends. And that if we had met at all in such a scenario, we wouldn't have even liked each other?"
"I get the feeling this might be tied to how you, apparently, so angrily told Xehanort off for messing with your fate, Kai: which lover boy saw through the power of the paopu fruits you shared," Riku snorted.
Kairi had thought that Sora would deny that answer—because as far as she was concerned, there was no way that that could be any part of the truth—but he surprised her when he looked at her and Riku in turn and admitted, "That is some of it. The way you reacted then, Kairi… you were so upset. And you had every right to be. So now that I've discovered this photo from Joshua of all people… well, how can we not look into it?"
"As much as I appreciate things Joshua has done for us, according to Neku, Josh isn't always the most trustworthy person," Riku protested, with his arms crossed over his chest. "…But," he allowed, with a small smile starting to spread out across his face—as he lifted Sora's face up, that had just fallen down with what he thought was discouragement. "You do make a good point with all of this, Sora, so we'll check it out. And even go to Shibuya, if we have to."
"And we may have to," Kairi found herself agreeing. "Because isn't that where you got the new app for your gummi pho—no, just phone—that takes pictures of the past? We may need to get these phones and apps ourselves. Especially if it turns out we need to go back to the Island and take more pictures."
"Definitely a thought," Sora agreed with a nod.
But before any more could be said by the trio on the subject, the gummi ship had lurched to a stop at their destination, causing Sora who had not been sitting in his seat to crash into Kairi, to which Riku tsked.
Under other circumstances, this could have been a romantic moment, like some books Kairi read made such an instance out to be, Kairi thought. But this was not that. The left side of Sora's body had crashed roughly into Kairi's right, and his jaw in particular had smacked into her cheek. It was painful for her, but she imagined it had particularly hurt Sora as she heard his teeth grind.
"Riku? Some help here, please?" Kairi ground out.
"I've got it," Riku promised, with what sounded like the air of an amused older brother in his voice. And not long after that. Kairi saw the glow of a green "cure spell," and instantly felt her muscles feeling better with it, and Riku helping Sora off of her.
Then, without much more preamble, the three of them left the gummi ship and began their march towards the tower.
…
"Hmm," Master Yen Sid said, stroking his beard as he examined the picture Sora had laid out in front of him on his desk. "It's true that Master Xehanort was far too crafty for his own good—and we now know time travel is one of the ways in which he managed this—but if he had planned something by changing your island, I would hope that those plans have dissipated when he was finally defeated."
Kairi had imagined that Sora would counter Yen Sid's argument like he had with her and Riku, but instead he seemed to shut down right away, which took her aback.
"So… does that mean that you won't give us a spell to even check this out, then? Or even look into it yourself?" Sora asked, with his head down, not even deigning to look at the aged Master, it seemed.
After Sora asked the question, there was a pregnant pause. And Kairi knew they all could have heard a pen drop, if any of them had had one on hand. Finally, Master Yen Sid said, "No, Sora. I will not. You see-"
But Sora did not wait for what was to be seen, because before Kairi could even blink, Sora held out his hand and summoned what looked like all of the junk in Master Yen Sid's room to hand and used it to make a motor bike! (1) Then, he called forth his Keyblade, unlocked the Lanes Between, and suddenly he was gone.
"You couldn't have been nicer?" Riku demanded whirling around on Master Yen Sid.
"You will find, Riku, that I think the issue is Sora is the one who isn't being 'nice' here, as you put it. There's much he hasn't let go of."
Kairi thought maybe she understood what Master Yen Sid was talking about… both Riku and her had had a version of Xehanort living in their hearts. And as horrible as those situations had been, it had strangely allowed them to make peace with certain things. Sora had never had that chance.
"Why do I feel like all of this is my fault?" Kairi despaired, remembering what Sora had said about partly being inspired in this whole endeavor by seeing her bawl Master Xehanort out while she'd been dreaming. He'd seen that… but he'd never seen her reluctantly forgive him within her heart.
"It's not," Riku was quick to assure her. "But if Master Yen Sid is right here… you may be the one person who can reach Sora now. Go to him, Kairi."
Kairi was about to protest that surely Riku could, too, because he'd dealt with Xehanort in his own heart, and had somewhat let their past go at the Keyblade Graveyard, she had heard. But just as she was about to say it, she knew that Riku was right, and it really had to be her.
She was the one who had dealt with all of this the most recently, after all. And according to Sora's own words, it was in protecting her own honor that his feeling of outrage at the picture had been doubled.
She also wondered if, deep down, Riku would always somewhat resent Ansem—and who could blame him?—whereas she could now look at Xehanort with pity for the youth who had lost himself.
"Alright," Kairi relented. "But know that I'm bringing our boy back before you even know it." And Kairi snuggled up in Riku's embrace in a quick hug, before summoning her Keyblade, armor, glider, and heading off to Shibuya.
…
When Kairi had ended up in Shibuya, she hadn't known where to go. She'd never been to the world, after all. Because of their connected hearts, she could somewhat sense Sora--so she somewhat followed that trail—but she also asked some kind locals for advice, and a lot of them told her that people liked to hangout at the café on Cat Street, so that's where she headed.
And the moment she entered the comfy looking place, that at once looked like it could fit in on her more rural home of Destiny Islands, but also as though it were a few decades ahead of it, she was at once met with a very repentant angel. "Miss Kairi, I'm so sorry I gave Josh that phone to give to Sora. Usually, my apps are spot on, but that one made a mistake. You guys' paopu tree roots were all twisted when it was first planted—but it grew out of it—nothing happened with it when it was fully grown. It's honestly an easy mistake to make... And I wasn't in my right mind when I installed the app, so…"
Ignoring for the moment that this tall brunet, with a serious case of five 'o clock shadow and hipster glasses seemed to somehow know who she was, Kairi zeroed in on the relevant bits of news here. "So, you're the one who invented the phone. Who are you?"
"Sanae Hanekoma, angel barista extraordinaire. If you're looking for some serious tasty beans, kid, then you-"
"Wait. You say the picture Sora took was wrong! Then that means-"
"Uhh, yeah,” this Sanae Hanekoma said scratching the back of his neck now, as he avoided looking at her. “That's kind of the main issue here. The Keyblade's chosen one doesn't seem to be taking that knowledge very well. If I were you, I'd-"
"Where is he?!" Kairi demanded, having to use sheer will to keep her Keyblade from appearing in her hand, as it reacted to her emotions. But Mr. Hanekoma seemed like a nice guy, if not just a little over stressed after whatever had apparently happened to him.
"I think he's heading towards the Shibuya River to chew J out for giving him the phone. It's a sewer not far from her- Hey!"
"Shibuya River, got it. Nice meeting you!" And thus, Kairi was running all over Shibuya again, but this time she was hoping Sora wouldn't do anything stupid.
…
Thankfully, it didn't take her too long to find him. He was sitting slumped down in front of the entrance to the stinky sewer as it rained, holding the picture just in front of him.
But as Kairi got closer to Sora now, she could tell that at some point since she had seen him last, he had in pencil tried to draw a young Xehanort sitting on their tree—even if the rain was trying to erase it.
"It's hard to believe, isn't it?" Kairi asked as she kneeled beside Sora now. "But once upon a time, Xehanort was just a boy who lived on our island—who probably did sit on our tree, just like that—and had a destiny not too different from ours."
"And I… hate him," Sora finally admitted now, with a grimace on his face, as well as rain sliding down it that made it look like he was crying. "Though I- I'm trying not to now. But the fact that I do- Kairi, what does that make me?" Sora asked his girlfriend, as he looked up at her with real fear in his eyes.
But Kairi could only see the same boy with an open heart, who she had told not to change all those years ago (a boy who hadn’t)—as she pushed his bangs back from his face and sat down beside him. "Someone who's honest, and doesn't let his fears define him, but rather faces them. And someone who is still willing to give chance after chance to someone even like Xehanort.
"And you know… we’re now aware that reincarnation is possible through Kingdom Hearts… maybe one day in facing your fears like you are now, you're overcoming them. And maybe one day, you'll meet Xehanort again. A new Xehanort. But now you won't see him as someone worthy of hate, but of friendship. If anyone could do that, it would be you, Sora."
"Heh. Thanks, Kairi," the Keyblade's chosen said blushing, as he stood up now and pulled Kairi up with him. And then she was taken aback once more for the day as he took the moment to peck her on her cheek.
It seemed that she might have her romantic moment, after all.
“Sora, what was that fo-” Kairi started, with her hand covering up where Sora’s lips had touched.
But before she could dwell on it too much, Sora was swiftly changing the subject. And as Kairi smiled softly, she decided that that was probably the best. For now. "Let's meet up with Riku and go home… but let's use your way, with the armor and everything. I'm done with things being broken today. I want to build." (2)
Now it was Kairi's turn to flush as she took Sora's hand, while she prepared to summon her Glider.
What she said now was something she had said about two years ago, but that time it hadn't stuck. This time, in her heart of hearts, she knew that it would and she and Sora and Riku would never be separated again, no matter what they faced together. "Yes, let's go home."
Author's Note: (1) Sora is using his “Scrap and Build” technique here, as seen from the KHIV trailer.
(2) Though there is, of course, a “build” part of Sora’s “Scrap and Build” power, here he’s saying he wants Kairi to take them back to Riku with her glider (which I’m guessing in this story, Sora never learned how to make), because he’s basically recognizing how Kairi is one who always builds and fixes things here (as she just helped him to do, in repairing his view of Xehanort), as a Princess of Heart and who he always views as home, to be honest. I hope you all enjoyed it. Happy Kairi Day!
Edit: Mr. H has recently gone through Neo TWEWY. That’s his deal.
#kairi#kairi day#kairi day 2025#destiny trio#sorikai#sokai#oneshot#fanfic#fanfiction#kh#kingdom hearts#canon#canon compliant#fluff#hurt/comfort#angst#friendship#slightest bit of romance#slight sokai#xehanort#xehanort (mentioned)#sora#riku#post-khv fic#twewy references#mine#my work#shanna writes#liz#bluerosesburnblue
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Not again…I’m not…strong enough…
#🤮#wuthering heights#it has begun#romances include courtship which wuthering heights does not#granted wuthering heights is a love story specifically#only hareton/cathy can be said to be a romance#but it’s definitely about catherine and heathcliff’s lovd#once again people can’t stomach any love story with even the slightest bit of moral ambiguity
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they had to make Cassandra straight because otherwise there is no way they could explain why Leliana wasn't dicking her down.
#leliana#cassandra pentaghast#dragon age#dragon age inquisition#dai#you know leliana has that romance in her if cassandra was even the slightest bit gay nobody would stand a chance
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Ok hi if you remember me using he/him pronouns to refer to Actias no you don't. I changed things up ok. Woman beam.
#ramblings of an arrow#basically I watched that one video that's been going around#very good video#very very good#and then I put... all of my own OCs(that I could think of in the moment) into a spreadsheet#to like do the same data analysis but on my own self#and! It wasn't as dire as I thought it was gonna be tbh#but it was still weighted toward men#did the slightest bit of adjusting and now it's weighted in the other direction#as it should be tbh#there were some characters where I looked at them and was like 'wait no it's like literally so much cooler and better if you're a woman'#'why hasn't it been this way from the start'#so fixed that#the reason actias was a man in the first place was davrin romance#and like look if im making her a woman she's gonna be a lesbian#but tbh I do more w/ my da pcs through playing touys with my wife#while we make more ocs together that are just off brand da characters who then become very much their own thing#and anyways I think that actias & whatever future OC becomes the davrin stand in would be great as butch for butch#so I'm not actually changing anything else#I just need everyone to know that in my personal internal canon this is a butch for butch relationship okay#i know nobody here sees the playing touys with my wife stuff just- just know.#also this isn't me like ignoring bisexuality or deeming bisexuals in 'straight' relationships less inherently queer#it's just that I have more bisexual characters than literally any other sexuality#and as a butch lesbian I want more butch lesbians#and I need to be the change#I can't complain about the lack of butches if I'm not also making more butches
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i really cant buy the headcanon that phoenix and edgeworth were romantically interested in each other as kids or that they were in love for the 15 or so years they didnt see each other, like it just doesnt make any sense or work at all. but i dont think this actually contradicts the way i think some of those scenes in the anime felt a bit romance coded, or like viewing phoenixs becoming a lawyer for edgeworth as like a romantic gesture? like it wasnt actually motivated by romantic feelings at all but the actual motivations and everything that happens ends up contributing towards a romantic storyline? (from a shipping perpesctive that is obviously)
#i dunno its just from what ive noticed from reading fanfic its like people dont really get the difference?#i mean that headcanon personally annoys me cause i think its stupid#but watching the anime like not saying the anime actually ships them but it does feel a bit romance coded sometimes#including those flashbacks#and see this isnt actually a revolutionary concept in the slightest its literally the most basic device in romance#but honestly im not sure some people in fandom actually understand how romance even works and think its literally just two#characters get together#i mean not taking the high horse here i might have thought that actually cause i was never really into it or read it or paid attention#but anyway as a story even an alternate reading of one not whats canon#like the idea of romance as a concept in fiction that tells a compelling story#its not just a literal like romance is happening thus they must have romantic feelings for eachother right now and the goal is get together#which is obvious i know i do really mean it i literally never paid attention to the genre#anyway back to ace attorney like the same thing actually in canon is the delites? like getting saved as a romantic gesture#despite not knowing each other#and also i think phoenixs actual motivation is a lot more interesting#not just how he was influenced by edgeworth in such a lasting way and like the concept of that sort of childhood friend you lose touch with#whos still that important cause of how they shaped your life and also just they were good friends like it was love for a former friend#but i also think the concept of edgeworth at that time in phoenixs mind like existed more than the real memory of the person?#and it seemed like he fixated on the idea of saving him because of the concept he represented as much as out of concern#yeah i know this has nothing to do with the post i just think the way a childhood friend who you idolise exists as a memory more than a rea#person and its actually a lot about you not them is really interesting#hm maybe shouldbe made a different post for all that#逆転裁判
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A couple of Ishmael centric fic bits before i pass out because it's 3am rn




#comet chasing#writings#in order of appearance:#nymphs of tempest au#scarlet ardor and chatvalier au#the former is really just my self indulgent bullshit taken to the extreme#basically (for this portion of it at least) it's an ishqueg kinda-reincarnation au where they've both become sea monsters/creatures#(kracken for ish and seal-selkie for quee)#ishy has a curse on her that binds her to another person (ruby)#it's by complete accident though so they're trying to figure out how to reverse it (as told in the fic bit)#anyway for the latter one... yeah.#post-dark cupid ishmael having a meltdown over enjoying her kissy time with don#and desperately trying to convince herself that she just did it out of nessecity and Did Not enjoy it in the slightest#her brain is not cooperating though#(not me projecting my home life and habits onto her ahahahahahaha.....)#(also i'm sorry if i don't write romance well/believably i'm aro and half of this shit flies over my head)#(i am primarily familiar with the stuff you see in movies)
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I played the interactive romcom on Netflix tonight and I have so many thoughts. And notes. So many notes.
#loved seeing scott michael foster back on my screen#does hating every option but paul make me old or just boring#the other two options suuuuucked#also?#not really a romcom#give me a main character with a shitty boyfriend at the start and a clear dream#stop slapping romcom on anything with the slightest bit of romance in it#choose love
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2024.06.05
#lets be real you can't show a cougar (me) a pretty boy (zhiguang) filming a romance (💒) with a 30 year old girl (bu guanjin)#and expect her (the cougar) to be completely normal and not even slightly in the slightest little bit jealous#xia zhiguang#bu guanjin#xzg:fancam
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Wait! Can you do the Yanderes Saja boys x reader pls? Except the reader is aroace and isn’t a fan of Kpop
Saja Boys x GN!Reader
a/n; oh anon luckilyy i'm both of those things ☺️ BUT I'M SO SORRY since it's my first time writing them, i kinda lost the point n it turned to a character study MY BAD 😭😭 feel free to send a request again!
summary; the most common imagine for the Saja Boys right now—them finding a human manager. They find the human's company a little too enjoyable....
— 🥤 [not proofread]
During their debut, Soda Pop—the Saja Boys had a passive objective: find someone in the audience who wasn't even the slightest bit interested in them.
It was Mystery who noticed you first.
Among the crowd, you glanced at them like the rest. Paused and listened like the rest. However, unlike the rest, you pulled out your phone not to record—but to draw your attention, and eventually walk away.
Mystery memorized your face. After all, with how obsessed humans are with paperwork and management, they had to have someone deal with the annoyances just to make them seem like the real deal.
So, after their performance, your presence was mentioned. They ultimately deemed that you're the one who stayed the shortest.
Jinu approached you first.
But he was an absolute loser and couldn't keep his story straight (hundreds of years of human society blurred from his knowledge), leading the rest of the Saja boys impatient and embarrassed for him.
The next best thing they do?
Reveal themselves. Threaten you. It's either your soul goes, or your free will goes.
They're not exactly the smartest, for sure... that came from Jinu's thoughts.
Nevertheless, it worked. You work for them now.
When you first got into this mess, you thought you'd be scared for your life every single day.
"But now I'm stuck with attention-seeking, clingy, needy arrogant—"
A slim finger touches your lips in a silent gesture. You glare pointedly at the demon.
Romance's stupid face is smiling. "Sshh. You should smile more. Like this." He stretches his lips further. "See? You're so much prettier when smiling."
There's nothing to smile about. You only huff and roll your eyes before obliging—a forced, crooked smile that genuinely made him wince.
Ignoring that and turning around, you spot Baby rummaging through your fridge again. You notice how loud he was doing it too; he intentionally does that to get your attention when he couldn't find anything he liked.
"I have some popsicles in the freezer," you say, walking over and opening the top part. Baby perks up at the sight and chuckles. "Bunch of flavors."
"Always know what we need," he snickers as he casually grabs all of them.
You ignore that and sit on the counter with Abby who's fumbling with his shirt buttons. He stiffens at the sight at you and plays it cool with a smile.
"Jinu's out again, huh?" you hum, gently taking over his task a moment ago. He relaxes in your care.
"Yeah," he nods. "Only a matter of time until the big boss calls him again."
Hmm. You don't know how to reply that. So, you simply don't. They rarely tell you anything, and if they do, it's always something you'd never have any context of.
You slip the last button off and pat his chest. "Done."
Abby stands up, his shirt flying dramatically away at the same time. You squint your eyes at his exposed abs that he's clearly so proud of.
Despite yourself, a snicker escapes you. Abby smirks and traces his pec with his thumb. "Beautiful, is it not?"
Cornball.
"Hey, wait," you turn away, leaving Abby disappointed from your lack of response, "where's Mystery?"
Oh, no.
You rush to your room and almost slam the door open—
Great. He's laying on your bed. Again.
"Mystery!" you yelp, and he immediately sits up at your voice. "Out! Out!!"
He scrambles out of your bed and teleports away. You do a quick inspection on your bed—alright. Nothing damaged at the very least.
You swear—you had two rules for them to which they agreed to: one, keep their human form. Second, STAY OUT OF YOUR BEDROOM. You have a guest room for their resting needs.
You head back to your living room, seeing them all huddled up on your couch. Each one of them having a popsicle with unique flavors.
"Baby," you call, only to end up with all of them turning to you. Your face flushes. "Uh, Baby. Give me one too."
He throws you a surprisingly not melted popsicle with a sweet smile.
"Thanks," you smile back. Then an idea comes in. They all seem like they're in a fairly good mood, so maybe you can take a break—
You grab a jacket from the rack. "Anyway, I hope you guys don't mind, but I'll go for a walk in the park—"
"NO," all of them growl, you flinch, turning around to see their demon forms—an exception to rule 1 is that it will be broken when they're deadly serious.
"..OkayIwon't"
— 🥀
working with crumbs.... saja boys writers u guys r killing it... also huntrix too pelase
#yandere kpop demon hunters#x reader#yandere#yandere kpdh#kpdh x reader#yandere saja boys x reader#saja boys x reader#I STILL LIKE KPOP THO#i just dont listen in the daily#yandere kpop demon hunters x reader
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u challenge the idea of amatonormativity and alloromanticism being the norm even slightly and alloromantics get really upset bc they're not used to even the slightest bit of pushback on their beliefs about romance bc of how culturally ingrained it is. like aros aren't coming for ur dream of personally having one (1) partner you're legally bound to for ur whole life you're still not only allowed to do that but encouraged to do that by literally the entirety of society. if the idea that that might not be an innate desire and might be socially constructed somewhat upsets u that's a u problem
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so lovey dovey



pairing: sim jaeyun x reader genre: fluff and romance warnings: consensual skinship, drunk!jake, kissing, kinda suggestive, 18+ inspired by jake's live where he says "when i'm drunk i become lovely & cute" as if he isnt always lovely and cute >_<
hoonieyun notes: some fluff because why nawt.. im slowly amping all of the angst in the up coming fics for february so i'm making up for it now by posting a few fluff and romance drabbles :3
wc: 1037
jake was sprawled across your couch as he takes occassional sips from his glass of beer. it wasn’t often that jake drank but tonight he invited the guys over for game night and that usually entails drinks and a bunch of food. you didn’t mind doing your own thing on the side as you lounged in the comfort of your bedroom, every now and then making an appearance to make sure everyone was good and not fighting for losing or winning or even stealing some of the food for yourself.
and that’s what you were about to do right now. you had just finished your small bowl of tteokbeokki and it certainly wasn’t enough so you decided to grab some more. you walk out of you and jake’s shared bedroom and find the group of guys arguing over mario kart.
jungwon claiming that niki cheated, jay not paying attention to the argument because he came in 1st place, and jake who was already staring at your figure standing in the hall.
“hi, baby” he says, drawing out the last part of the petname.
“hi, jakey. i just want some more food.” you chirp as you approach and he instantly takes your bowl to fill it with more food. “you sure you don’t wanna come join us?” he asks, handing you back your bowl.
“mmm…” you ponder, looking over to niki and jungwon who are still arguing and sunoo who was having too much fun laughing at the two younger guys bicker. before you could even answer, jake is pulling you into his lap and whispering into your ear, “please, stay.” he says. his breath was low and warm and it sent tickles down your back. you nod in agreement and his smile widens at your response.
jake loved having you around at all times, even when you two weren’t necessarily doing anything, he just loved having you near him.
the guys often teased him that he was too whipped or down bad for you and jake would just brush it off. of course he was down bad for you, every man should be down bad for his girlfriend, if he wasn’t then he was doing something wrong.
you silently eat your food as the games continue, heeseung using his eldest privileges to change the game to which jungwon groaned as he wanted another chance at mario kart.
you weren’t sure what game they were playing but they all took turns passing the controller around to kill monsters and what not. and when it came to jake’s turn, the guys would groan in annoyance after jake causes them to die and lose the game.
all of them turned their attention to jake who was too busy staring at you eating your tteokbeokki to pay any mind to the game they were playing.
“dude, you just let us die!”
“earth to jake?”
“hellooo?”
they all tried to get his attention but he was too immersed in you to notice. eyes sparkling as he watches you fondly and lovingly. a cute habit of his whenever he got drunk or even the slightest bit tipsy.
he would get very cute and lovely and wouldn’t be able to get you out of his head as if you weren’t always occupying his mind.
“jakey, the guys are talking to you..” you say, blinking a few times at him and his smile widens when he hears your voice.
jake doesn’t even glance over to the guys, he just sloppily passes the remote to one of them in which sunghoon catches it and continues the game after jake has caused their character to die. jake had you in his lap, gently rubbing your thighs as he rests his head on your back. humming occassionally whenever you leaned closer into his touch.
“can you ask them to leave.. i wanna be alone with you.” he whispers into your ear.
“why can’t you do it..” you whisper back and he explains that if you tell everyone to go home they’ll listen because you’re a girl but if he does it they’ll all just ignore him and want to continue game night. you think about it for a second and he’s absolutely right. so you give him a nod and a small kiss on the forehead to which jake gets flustered and shy over, pulling his bottom lip between his teeth as he blushes at your actions.
you decide to stand up and do an exaggerated yawn, “gosh, i’m exhausted, what time is it?” you say, looking over to the clock on the wall and just like that– the guys take the hint and start packing up all of the things. they each help with putting things in the kitchen to throw away or to be washed and soon enough they were all saying their goodbyes and filing out of your shared apartment with jake.
“finally.. i can have you all to myself.” jake says, a pout on his lips as he pulls you into a hug. he brings the two of you to your bedroom, not letting go of you once. you try to get out of his grasp but he begins to whine and pout, “relax, jaeyunnie. i’m just turning off the lights.” you say and he jumps up from his spot on the bed, running over to the lightswitch and flicking it off before running back to bed and cuddling up to you.
he nuzzles his head on your shoulder as the two of you cozy up to one another, placing several kisses on your neck and cheek. “i wanna stay like this forever.” he says. you just love whenever he gets like this, so cute and lovey dovey. his ears and cheeks a shade of red from the alcohol and his need to express how much he loved you and loved being near you.
“goodnight jakey..” you say, waiting for him to say it back but you’re met with the sound of his snores, causing you to chuckle, pulling your phone out and snapping a photo of how cute he looked while sleeping, ears still red and his face slightly buried in the crook of your neck.
jake, your cute and lovey dovey boyfriend.



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CAN YOU SEE ME? IM WAITING FOR THE RIGHT TIME ..



──── 𝗍𝗁𝖾𝗒 𝖼𝖺𝗇’𝗍 𝗆𝖺𝗄𝖾 𝖺 𝗆𝗈𝗏𝖾, 𝗇𝗈 𝗈𝗇𝖾 𝖾𝗅𝗌𝖾 𝖼𝖺𝗇.
bsf!enhypen x fem!rea 7OO non-idol au fluff potential future relationship ૮(^﹏^ ! skinship jealousy 【 MUSÉE 】
じや wrote this in a rush ! enjoy 🎀
rbs ✶ comments please + daily
𝐇𝐄𝐄𝐒𝐄𝐔𝐍𝐆 。 。 watches you from a distance. with his eyes wide as a deer caught in the headlights, he doesn’t say anything or does anything about it— he just watches. he can’t help but observe your movements, the way you laugh or how you tuck your hair behind your ear while you talk to the other man. he studies you, sadness in his eyes, trying to find out if you are interested in someone other than him or not. “what?” you ask him when you see the grimace on his face. instead of answering, he questions you too, “do you like him?” relief washes over him in a wave when you shake your head, “i thought we were just talking but he wanted more,” then you add, “i’d rather spend time with you”.
⠀ ㅤㅤㅤㅤㅤ﹙ᵕ ᵕ⠀look under the cut ! ♡
𝐉𝐀𝐘 。 。 is always near you. in any circumstances, in any sort of place. if you are near, he is too�� almost as if he was your bodyguard or, you as you prefer to say, guardian angel. any person that approaches you, approaches him too and needs to get approved by him to even talk to you. therefore, there is no need to explain that when a guy tries to talk to you, they get hit by a presence impossible to ignore right behind you. the menacing glares can make anyone pale and stumble over their words in front of you. and the funniest part, is that you are well aware of that but decide to act clueless— always shooting a fake confused look at him before smiling sweetly when yet another man runs away from you.
𝐉𝐀𝐊𝐄 。 。 as your known best friend, many people come to him when they wonder if you are single and try to find a way to ask you out. unfortunately for them, he is not only your best friend but also desperately and irrevocably in love with you. so, in lieu of giving proper answers and advice, he assures them that you are already taken, by no one else but him. and to be completely honest, it works quite well. he even likes to, just for the sake of the silly little lie— of course, be really clingy in front of others. you don’t mind, he has always been like that, and it makes him happy to touch you for a second and be your lover. even if it’s through everyone’s eyes but yours.
𝐒𝐔𝐍𝐆𝐇𝐎𝐎𝐍 。 。 he has a special radar for whoever has romantic interests towards you. i mean, he would know how having a crush ok you feels like. since he has been in love with you since primary school. so, where are both around someone who seems to like a you a little bit too much, he starts his extra-clingy and affectionate best friend act. draping his arm on your shoulders, talking to you nonstop and asking for your attention as soon as your eyes go on anywhere else but him. “are you drunk?” you laugh all of the time, not even annoyed in the slightest. he is drunk, drunk in love.
𝐒𝐔𝐍𝐎𝐎 。 。 he is unable to control his face when a guy comes to talk to you. he stares at him with a disgusted and utterly offended expression on the surface of his face. as soon as romance is being involved, he tugs you close without thinking— the petname ‘sweetheart’ even slip out. you don’t seem to mind, you only excuse yourself to your other interlocutor before focusing fully on your best friend. when you don’t look, he shoots to the flabbergasted man a very proud grin. he loves to be your favorite.
𝐉𝐔𝐍𝐆𝐖𝐎𝐍 。 。 he is flabbergasted, took over by immense disbelief and utter shock. he just watched the cashier shamelessly flirt with you— right in front of hom, without decorum. yes, he is not your boyfriend, but come on! he believes that the cashier should have been a little bit ashamed at least. “please,” he pleads as soon as you get out of the shop. “don’t tell me you are going to go out with that guy.” you immediately smile, a teasing question already tingling your tongue, “why? are you jealous?” his heart drops, his face reddens and he starts walking as you chuckle.
𝐑𝐈𝐊𝐈 。 。 uses all his strength to try to not be jealous— alas, he fails as soon as he even thinks about you and that ‘nobody’ together. he looks at you with sad eyes and a frown, as if he was a kicked puppy, whereupon you tell him you got asked on a date by the stranger. “wouldn’t you rather spend time with me?” he asks you, and you giggle. “what? this guy will be boring in two weeks but, i will be fun forever.” this idiot isn’t even able to contain his happiness when you tell him that he is right, that you will stay with him tonight. he is so happy that he hugs you, tight.
𓈒ㅤㅤ𓈒 taglist open & network : @sgz-net
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I don’t know if it would reach you but I’ll give it a try
ATEEZ reaction to Make-Up Sex after their S/O distancing themselves after a fight
MAKE UP SEX WITH ATEEZ

PAIRING — ateez x reader
GENRE — smut, romance, angst (the slightest bit), make up, boyfriend!ateez, fem!reader, sub!reader, soft dom!ateez
WARNINGS — mentions of arguments, smut, unprotected sex, make up sex, oral (f receiving), fingering, use of pet names (baby), intentional lower case and small font, intentional word abbreviations
WORD COUNT — 1.2k
SUMMARY — make up sex with ateez after an argument.
HONGJOONG
“c’mon, baby. need to hear you. please.”
his thrusts increased in speed, fucking into you at a rhythm just as messy as his thoughts. your moans poured out of you, your hands clutching at his back until he groaned at the way your nails pierced his skin. he soaked up every last one of your cries, reveled in the way you clung to him like a lifeline. god, he’d missed your voice, missed you. he hated arguing, even more so when he knew he was in the wrong. your silence was the worst part of it all; he wasn’t able to stand it not even a day before he was clambering back to you.
hongjoong’s hips pistoned into you with a purpose to pull every last sound from you until you were falling apart underneath him. you cried into the nape of his neck, your hold on his back never letting up. “hongjoong, hongjoong, hongjoong…”
his name on your tongue was enough to undo him. he held you close to him quickly after, kissing all over your face and showering you with proclamations of love and apologies.
SEONGHWA
“fuck, i’m sorry. i’m so fucking sorry, baby.”
seonghwa was urgent, desperate to make you fall apart. his thrusts were hurried and they were deep, cockhead kissing against that sweet spot inside you repeatedly. he buried his face in your neck, kissing your warm skin. his hand searched over the sheets for yours until he found it. his fingers locked with yours and he gave you a loving squeeze. it was little actions like this that reminded you of how much he adored you. and you reveled in the little acts of love, thankful to have a boyfriend that cared enough for you to show his love for you after arguments.
“seonghwa,” you breathed between moans. “i love you.”
seonghwa smiled. you forgave him. “i love you, too.”
YUNHO
“i love you. so damn much. gonna make you feel better, baby.”
yunho’s breath was hot against your ear. his lips rested just at your temple as you sat across his lap, your arms around his shoulders while one of his hands touched you between your thighs. two long fingers stuffed your leaky hole, making you mewl into his neck. he felt your hold on him grow tighter, and he smiled. he kissed your temple. he scissored you open, preparing you for his cock later, fucking your pussy with his fingers until he felt your slick begin to drip down his hand.
“l-love you,” you whispered, though it was almost too much to manage as his fingers brought you closer to an orgasm. “i feel s’good, yunho.”
and yunho kept making you feel good, eventually breaking you apart on his cock and fucking you until your argument was long forgotten.
YEOSANG
“please, wanna know how good i’m making you feel. wanna make it up to you.”
yeosang’s hands were placed on either side of your hips, guiding you up and down on his cock. he watched you, witnessing the view of you above him, your head rolled back and mouth agape. you looked divine like this, and all he wanted to do was make you feel this good forever.
your hands found stability on his thighs as you began to lose yourself to the pleasure. “i feel good, yeo. fuck, so good.”
yeosang urged you to an orgasm, cursing under his breath as he watched you fall apart from above. you clamped around him like a vice and his cock throbbed with need to release, but he withheld his own end. he flipped you over until you were flat against the mattress, taking his spot above you. he didn’t waste any time before sliding back into you with a languid thrust.
“give me one more, please. don’t wanna stop until i’m sure i’ve earned your forgiveness.”
SAN
“don’t wanna fight ever again. just wanna be with you like this. god i’m so sorry, baby.”
san hugged you tightly, keeping your frame firm against his. your back was against his chest, his hands fondling your breasts, and his mouth at your ear. his cock drove into you so deep and slow it made your brain short circuit, turning to mush in your skull. he fucked you with practiced precision, it was like he was trying to use his body to tell you how sorry he was. one of his hands left your chest to grip the bend of your knee and pull your leg up to offer him a better angle.
with each thrust, the memory of the argument began to vanish. all you were able to think about was him and the rapidly approaching orgasm. “i forgive you, san, just make me cum. please, please, please!”
“oh baby,” san cooed with a kiss to your ear. “don’t you worry. i’m gonna make you cum. gonna make you fall apart, and then do it all over again. gotta make up for all the lost time, yeah?”
MINGI
“sorry, sorry, sorry. let me kiss it better. please, baby.”
mingi’s large hands gripped at your thighs firmly but tenderly. he had you splayed open before him as he feasted on your essence, pouring every ounce of himself into your pleasure. his pointy nose bumped your clit just as his tongue passed between your folds and your back arched prettily off the mattress. he needed to make you feel good to make up for the fight, to use his tongue to show you how truly sorry he was.
“mingi, ‘m gonna cum…” you sounded so sweet, and fuck, you tasted even sweeter. he pressed his face further into your cunt.
“gonna make you cum as much as you want to, baby.”
WOOYOUNG
“wanna make you cry from pleasure, not from pain. fuck, i’m sorry baby.”
wooyoung’s thumb wiped a fallen tear away, palm warm against your cheek. he gazed down at you just as he pushed himself in again. your lips trembled and brows furrowed; you looked so beautiful when you cried from how good he was making you feel. it was a much better sight than seeing you cry after arguing with him, and much better than hearing your sniffles from the locked bedroom. he caressed your cheek with his thumb while his hips quickened in tempo, cooing at you sweetly as you began to whimper.
“wooyoung, please.” your plea was soft, broken. he soothed you with kisses against your forehead. he kept the same pace, hips gliding back and forth until you were coming undone underneath him.
he was there to console you, to guide you through your high with tender touches and words.
JONGHO
“i love you. please, need to hear you say you still love me, too.”
jongho wasn’t able to keep his hands off you. he caressed your frame, attentive to every dip and curve, as his cock slid in and out of you. you were breathless under him, mouth opening and closing like you were attempting to speak. “please, baby.”
you swallowed a moan. you gripped his wrists at either side of your face, holding onto them like a lifeline as you tried to gather your thoughts. “i lo—” a moan, “love you, jongho. s’much.” and no argument could ever change that.
jongho dipped his head down until his forehead was against yours. his eyes found yours, and he adored the way yours were glazed over from the pleasure. he smiled lovingly, and the sight made your insides flutter. “you’re amazing.” jongho followed up his words with an increase in tempo, fucking you deep until you fell apart under the weight of pleasure and love.
TAG LIST — @abiaswreck @hongthoven @jungkookieprincess @lilie-dctl @mjyungi @marievllr-abg @mylovelymito @nebulousbookshelf @northerngalxy @silverpixiedust23 @staytinyinmybpack @thesafecafe (if you’d like to be on my tag list, find the tag list form link on the pinned post on my blog!)
NETWORKS — @kflixnet @wonderlandnet
ALL FICS ARE THE ORIGINAL IDEAS AND WRITTEN WORKS OF NATEEZFICS. DO NOT PLAGIARIZE. REPOSTING WITHOUT CONSENT FROM THE AUTHOR NATEEZFICS IS PROHIBITED!
#wonderlandnet#ateez smut#ateez smut drabbles#ateez x reader#hongjoong x reader#seonghwa x reader#yunho x reader#yeosang x reader#san x reader#mingi x reader#wooyoung x reader#jongho x reader#ateez fanfiction#ateez scenarios#ateez imagines
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freudian



pairing(s): choi beomgyu x you, choi soobin x you
summary: freudian - susceptible to analysis in terms of unconscious desires. or, your parents have forced you to be "best friends" with minji, a woman you're convinced was put on this earth specifically tailored for you to have a mutual hatred with, since elementary school. she's confident, beautiful, and charming; and her boyfriend, beomgyu, is just as formidable. he's been a pain in your ass, an asshole to you to the most severe degree, since they got together in college. now, you're roommates with minji, but you begin to secretly take interest in beomgyu's best friend, soobin. it's just that... beomgyu's been acting weird these days.
genre: angst, romance, smut (mdni), lowkey yandere
warnings: smut (mdni!!!), yandere!beomgyu but more like pathetic!beomgyu, oral (f. receiving), unprotected sex, impregnation kink, no real dom/sub dynamic bc it didn't feel right but sub!gyu is coming back in a big way in "our deal"
word count: 13.1k
notes: hello my friends! i know i've been gone for a minute and i told myself i would post this on my bday at the latest... mind u it was in may LOL but this is a bit long for me so i hope that makes up for it a little 🥹 thank you all for being so patient with me. i hope you enjoy, and if you do, please leave feedback—it is truly so encouraging! if you don't like it please spare me i beg you cuz i'm still riding the struggle bus n don't want my feelings hurt
( ཀ͝ ∧ ཀ͝ )
“human beings are funny. they long to be with the person they love, but refuse to admit it openly. some are afraid to show even the slightest sign of affection because of fear. fear that their feelings may not be recognized, or even worse, returned. but one thing about human beings that puzzles me the most is their conscious effort to be connected with the object of their affection, even if it kills them slowly within.” - sigmund freud
-
you’ve never been one to try to work against the inevitable. some would call it pragmatism, others would call it simply being a fucking loser, but you try not to dwell on its meaning. as it is, when your parents forced you to become “best friends” and “practically sisters” with minji in elementary school, you just let it happen. and when she inevitably drew the attention of every boy your eyes happened to linger on for longer than ten seconds, you also let that happen. as the years passed, and your parents forced you to tolerate all of minji’s, frankly, bitchy behavior, you stopped trying to avoid your fate and became as seemingly unflappable as you are now.
to say that minji is cartoonishly evil would simply be a lie, no matter how much you feel that way, but even you can recognize that she’s nice to a lot of people. it’s just, for some reason, you’re not one of them. when you two were forced to hang out together with friends, she would always bring up embarrassing stories to try to get them to laugh at you, and she's so damn charming, it worked. and on the rare occasion in which you felt kind of confident in your looks, she’d wait until you all were in public to point out insecurities you didn't even know you had. and the one time in middle school when you finally tried to tell your parents how awful minji was to you after she lied to the boy you liked by telling him that you called him ugly—which somehow resulted in her “comforting” him and becoming his first girlfriend—minji bawled like a baby during the mediation. in the end, you had to apologize to her for hurting her feelings.
even so, forced proximity is a breeding ground for understanding, and you understood minji from the start. in the same way, she understood you. honestly, regardless of your wishes, she probably understood you better than anyone else; but that is no longer the case. for as much as you two have always hated each other, there used to be fleeting moments of connection. her making a snide comment about an obnoxious neighbor when they compared you to her, and you taking care to make sure nobody ate the rest of her favorite dish when she was late to family dinner. you two may have disliked each other, but there was an undercurrent of… something. it was a twisted relationship, you won't deny that, but it was a relationship, nonetheless. however, all of that dissipated like smoke once you reached early adulthood. to this day, you're not sure why.
yours and minji’s parents pretty much forced you to room together in college, both stating that it was the only way they’d feel comfortable with you two being on your own. regardless of how quickly the two of you would now dismiss such a ridiculous notion, you were both relieved at the idea. it was almost like having a built-in companion. however, very shortly after you two settled in, things went from mildly bad to absolutely abysmal. undeniable, but ultimately menial, feelings of derision from minji became outright disdain towards you. you won't lie and say you didn't become petty in return, and you’ve never cared enough to fix such a strange dynamic, though you sometimes wonder if you should.
as it stands, minji could hear you getting slandered to pieces, and she’d probably join in. as for you, you’d indifferently watch someone gorge the rest of her favorite dish at family dinner rather than speak up for her. now, after both having graduated and joined the workforce, you no longer have to worry about threats to cut your livelihood off. realistically, you could stand up to your parents and say, “fuck minji, fuck her parents, and fuck you both for manhandling me into being her friend!” but that sounds awfully dramatic, so you won’t.
besides, minji, for all of her raging bitchiness, is actually the best roommate you could ever ask for. for example, she never leaves her stuff lying around, and she always rinses off her dishes before putting them in the dishwasher. the only consistent downside has been the men she’s brought home since freshman year of college, which you declare are none of your business, but the sounds of her… passionate encounters are a real drag. still, you could mostly tolerate them, but her current—and seemingly permanent—boyfriend seems determined to elicit the most perverse sounds he can out of her. at first, you prayed that it was just the honeymoon phase, but it’s been literal years at this point, and the screams reverberating through the walls of your apartment would be an inconvenience to anyone; but it’s especially troubling on nights like tonight, in which you have to be up extra early tomorrow morning for a meeting at work.
as you clutch a pillow to the top of your head in a vain effort to muffle out the lascivious noise, you contemplate maybe sending a text message asking minji to try to keep it down. maybe you could knock on the wall, and maybe that'd remind her that you're also a sentient human being who happens to occupy the room right next to hers. but you know it'd be fruitless, know it’d do nothing to actually help your situation. in fact, on the rare occasions that you’ve politely requested that they be considerate of your poor, battered sleep schedule, or even just subtly hinted to having something important in the early morning you needed to be well-rested for, it's always seemed to come back around and bite you in the ass. it's almost like they become even more unhinged than usual when they know you need your sleep, so there's absolutely no point in trying to get them to quiet down. still, as the hour ticks by, you become more and more anxious that you'll be unable to wake up tomorrow morning, so with a sigh, you tentatively knock on the wall between your bedrooms.
surprisingly, the noise ceases, and you really think standing up for yourself might have just worked out in your favor for once, but then you hear minji and her boyfriend snicker, and then there's the damning sound of their resumed activities. she was loud before, but now, it's like minji is being mauled or something. so much for being well-rested.
-
you wake up the next morning feeling like you got hit by a truck, and you just know you look like shit. you try your best to cover your dark circles, but at this point, who are you fooling? when you finally leave your bedroom, you run into minji’s boyfriend, the one she's been obsessed with since college. beomgyu.
“good morning,” he says with a lazy smirk as he leans over the counter. “did you sleep alright?” god, he’s such a fucking asshole.
“yep,” you mumble as you push past his shirtless body and reach into the fridge for your lunch.
“really? doesn't seem like it. you look like shit,” he chuckles, and while you don't even spare him a glance, you can just feel the smug look on his face emanating off of him and boring into the back of your head.
“thanks,” you say flatly as you fill up your water bottle. you're unsure why he even talks to you, but if you had to put it into words, it'd probably be something akin to the phenomenon of a cat watching a mouse as it backs itself into a corner. even so, you don't know why he bothers with trying to get a reaction out of you. you've never reacted to his taunts very much, but he still seems hellbent on making life difficult for you.
“you know, maybe if you got some good action, you’d understand why minji's as loud as she is,” beomgyu continues, almost as if he doesn't sense your unwillingness to participate in this—or really any—conversation with him.
“i'll keep that in mind,” you say perfunctorily as you shuffle over to the doorway and slide on your shoes before shutting and locking the door behind you. you don't see the way beomgyu’s fists clench at your unrelentingly dismissive tone, and even if you did, you wouldn't understand it.
-
in retrospect, you didn't have a particularly strong impression of beomgyu when you first met him. you vaguely remember him hanging around minji, and you somewhat recall listening to her rave about him against your will. still, her treating him like he’d been molded by the hands of the muses probably killed any interest in getting to know him in its crib. honestly? you probably should have planted some seeds of doubt in her mind when you two were still somewhat cordial, because if you had, maybe he wouldn't be with her today. your penchant for apathy has cost you peace, it seems, because beomgyu is at every family function and in every family photo, and at this point, it’s only a matter of time before he’s your de facto brother-in-law.
it looks as though his continuous onslaught of criticisms about your appearance, your demeanor, and your very presence have no discernible end in sight; and minji is more than happy to up the ante whenever he's around, which is fucking always. you almost think that you, in some strange way, make their bond grow even stronger. after all, you're pretty passive prey, and it must be somewhat fun to invent new ways in an effort to push your buttons. still, you're older and more jaded now, and you're pretty resigned to your fate. anyway, there's no way to make a completely clean break from them without your family causing an uproar; and for as much as you resent them, you don't want to do that.
-
you've been staying out more and more these days. after all, you're not getting much sleep at home, so what's the point of being there? plus, you’re effectively harassed by minji and beomgyu every time you have the displeasure of seeing them, so why bother? at least, that's what one would think your reasoning is, but reality is much more complicated than that. and your reality involves soobin, a guy you met in college, who you happened to reconnect with when you went out drinking with some coworkers a few months ago.
how do you know soobin in the first place? well, you initially met him through his best friend… beomgyu. so, complicated is putting it very generously. frankly, you’re surprised someone as sweet and mild-mannered as soobin is best friends with an asshole like beomgyu, but then, you’re “best friends” with someone you fucking hate, so you guess that’s just how things work out sometimes.
even when you are home, you don’t speak to beomgyu, who’s at your apartment so much, you wonder why he and minji haven’t just bitten the bullet to officially move in together and leave you stranded; but you're thankful they haven't because the roommate market is in dire straits. realistically, you never did speak to either of them for any meaningful amount of time outside of deflecting their verbal jabs about how you're an undesirable loser, but now, it’s even less than ever.
you spend the night at soobin’s pretty much constantly, so tonight, your elusive presence at your own apartment is particularly jarring. the kitchen is dimly lit by the moonlight and the fluorescent lighting above the stove, and the only sounds are from you quietly opening up the plastic of the post-midnight snack you’re making. that is, until you hear the door to minji's room opening as beomgyu creeps out and lightly shuts the door behind him. you immediately register his nearly-naked form, but you're so used to it by now, you don't even blink.
“hey," he says tentatively, but you've never been particularly in tune with beomgyu's emotions, so you don't catch the hesitation in his greeting.
"mm," you hum as you furrow your eyebrows, focusing on preparing your snack.
"you haven't, uh, been around much. everything okay?" he asks gently.
“yep,” you reply as you focus on setting the timer.
“have you been working a lot?” he probes.
“not really,” you mumble as you begin to pour yourself a glass of water. it's late, and you've been with soobin all night, only returning home because you didn't bring a change of clothes for work tomorrow, so your inhibitions are lowered. you're not as guarded as usual, and beomgyu is intent on capitalizing off of that.
“you should eat some real food,” he suggests, trying another tactic. “i could… i could make you something, if you want.” this is… weird. beomgyu has never offered to cook for you, and while he's made things before that you happen to like, it’s always been in service of minji; and he’s only ever offhandedly remarked that there were leftovers available to you. of course, you’ve always refused, so his present consideration is daunting, to say the very least. finally, you make eye contact with him.
“uh, thanks, but it's fine. i'm tired, so i want to eat something easy and quick before bed,” you say as you redirect your attention to your timer, willing it to move faster so you can eat and get the hell out of here. you push your hair back as you wait, and you unknowingly reveal a darker patch of skin where soobin had unintentionally sucked too hard on your neck. in the dim light of the kitchen, beomgyu’s eyes immediately zero in on the mark. he draws closer, his tall frame looming over yours as he holds your hair back to get a better look.
“what's this?” you balk at his question and his overly-familiar proximity. you try to pull away, but he just steps closer, essentially trapping you between himself and the counter.
“who were you with?” he asks between clenched teeth, his eyes narrowing with a darkness you’ve never seen from him, or from anyone, really.
you wave his hand away in annoyance.
“why do you care? you're too close,” you defiantly reply. his jaw ticks as he leans down closer to your face, his intent eyes scanning your annoyed ones.
“who were you with?” he repeats, his voice even lower this time. thank god above that your timer goes off, and you push him off of you as you grab your food and scurry to your room, eager to put some distance between the two of you. you shut your door, as usual, but for some reason, you're compelled to lock it.
-
you think of your bizarre encounter as a one-time thing, though you're still not sure what to make of it. yours and minji’s families have always tried to push the “family” narrative between you two, and beomgyu by extension, so you briefly entertain the thought that he might actually just be buying into the ludicrous idea, albeit belatedly; but that thought is snuffed out when his previous asshole behavior is dialed up to 100. the groceries you buy are always mysteriously gone before you can even finish eating them, your keys are never where you left them, and you swear minji and/or beomgyu are using your shampoo with the intent of draining it immediately every time you buy a new bottle. is this their way of “hinting” at you to kick rocks and find your own place? if so, how petty. getting a new place on your own would be expensive, and while you're not home much anymore, you feel it's far too early in your relationship with soobin to formally suggest moving in together. you'll just tough it out.
among all the preteen-level hazing tactics, though, there is one thing that genuinely unsettles you: things in your room are always slightly out of place. your mirror is slightly tilted a bit differently than usual, the clothes in your dresser are folded a bit more crisply than you remember, and you're trying not to feel crazy when you can't find a few pairs of your favorite panties.
tonight, you're finally home from a long, long day of work, and all you want to do is relax. you realize that soobin's home is a lot more peaceful, but his parents are visiting from out of town until tomorrow evening, which means they’ll be staying at his apartment until then. soobin still kindly offered to have you spend the night, and while you'd be happy to meet his parents, you’d feel a bit awkward with going any further than a simple dinner for a first introduction.
so you're home. while you thought you knew beomgyu’s schedule well enough to successfully avoid him, it seems that he's awake far later than usual, and he's lounging on the couch when you walk through the doorway. his eyes immediately dart up when he sees you.
“damn it,” you mentally curse, and it's like he can hear your unsavory thoughts.
“home late from whoring around again?” he drawls. you roll your eyes while taking off your shoes, but he’s especially relentless tonight.
“that's all you're doing, you know,” he continues. “nobody will ever take you more seriously than that. what do you have to offer other than mediocre sex?” there's a sneer on his mouth, which is normal, but his eyes are burning with the same unsettling intensity you registered when you last saw him; and while you’ve usually considered beomgyu as a mildly annoying pest, you start to feel a real inkling of anger. you don’t care—well, you shouldn't care—but it’s like he's dealing even lower blows than usual. you're about to answer with something —anything—but he does not take kindly to your silence.
“see, even you don't know the answer to my question,” he says with a mean laugh. “that poor bastard must be desperate for pussy to settle for you. but easy is easy, i guess.”
for the first time ever, you actually do respond, and of all the things you could conceivably say, you unintentionally utter a string of words that happen to be particularly soul-crushing to beomgyu: “you're fucking disgusting.” you don't stick around after that, because he clearly doesn't give a shit, so why should you? you could rub your relationship with beomgyu’s very own best friend in his face, but he's not worth it. you’ll go back to ignoring him like you usually do, and you genuinely consider scouring the web for roommates. you even consider just moving out and paying this city’s exorbitant amount of rent on your own. you'll see.
beomgyu, however, is reeling from what you said. for reasons he can't possibly begin to understand, those three seemingly innocuous words, probably uttered without much thought, seemed to dig at something inside of him he can't quite explain. the pain is there, but its source is buried deep down, down, down in his stomach. he tells himself it meant nothing, that you didn't even think about what you said before saying it; but for some reason, the notion that you didn't have to think about it, that you just said what you honestly felt for him, makes him feel even worse.
he's not sure what outcome he was expecting. after all, he wanted to push your buttons, so why did succeeding for the first time feel so… so strange? he feels a sense of unease unlike anything he’s ever felt before. he’d talk about his feelings, but he doesn't understand where they're coming from, and even if he did, who would he tell? minji? the thought alone is laughable. while she has absolutely no qualms about dumping all of her problems on him, he’s never reciprocated. besides, any mention of you quickly devolves into shit-talking. he could tell soobin, but his so-called best friend has been flaking on him for reasons unknown.
between the two, the answer is clear: soobin. still, having a non-conversation with him sounds unappealing, so he'll simply make soobin come out with him and the rest of their friend group. even if he can't quite articulate his feelings, just getting wasted with his friends should be enough to tie him over. he texts his group chat naming a day, time, and bar. everyone eagerly agrees, even his recently dodgy best friend.
-
being fifteen minutes late is one thing—even thirty minutes would be acceptable—but when soobin still hasn’t shown up an hour after the agreed upon time, beomgyu is thoroughly irritated. he tries to text, but when they remain unanswered, he harshly pushes out his chair and heads to the bathroom to call his increasingly unreliable best friend. the phone rings… and rings… and rings. beomgyu’s jaw clenches as he begins to accept that soobin, in fact, will not answer. then, just when he’s about to hang up, a groggy voice echoes into his ear.
“hello?”
beomgyu tries to rein in his temper as he snaps, “soobin, where the fuck are you?”
“huh?” soobin mumbles.
“you were supposed to be here a fucking hour ago. why are you bailing again? are you hooking up with someone without telling me?” usually, beomgyu couldn't care less about who soobin’s latest fuck is, but he feels the barest amount of dread in his stomach for reasons he will soon understand.
“uh, no,” soobin replies, his voice a little clearer this time in lieu of beomgyu’s edge. “i’m just… really tired. look, i’m sorry i bailed again. we’ll go out soon, okay?” beomgyu is temporarily placated until the following moment.
“come back to bed,” beomgyu hears someone whine in a sleepy voice. it’s too low for beomgyu to pinpoint whose it is, but the dread he feels makes a resurgence.
“are you fucking serious right now?” beomgyu snarls. “you keep bailing on me because you're shacking up with someone, aren't you?” he's not sure why, but he's compelled to ask, “who is it?”
“no! it’s… it’s just the tv, i swear. look, uh, i’ve gotta go. i’ll text you later, alright?” soobin thinks he hangs up the phone, but unfortunately for everyone involved, he does not. beomgyu knows he should end the call and grill soobin for some answers later, but something tells him to keep listening, so he does—which is a decision he will come to regret.
“you're such a baby,” soobin coos as he loudly plants kisses down somebody's body. fuck whatever decision beomgyu thought he was making, he’s hanging up now. but then, a voice he’d know anywhere cuts through the haze. your voice.
“mmm, soobin, i need more.”
what the fuck?
beomgyu gasps sharply as if he’s been kicked square in the chest, the breath leaving his lungs until they start to burn. he thinks it can't get any worse than this, but then the real noise starts. it’s all a blur, really, but between the breathy moans, the cries of pleasure, the unmistakable sound of flesh meeting flesh, and soobin’s filthy words of satisfaction, what really stuns beomgyu the most is your stomach-churning praise. he can barely comprehend where he is, can barely register anything outside of the noises that threaten to break a barrier within him that he never even knew existed.
beomgyu’s eyes squeeze shut, and his voice is nothing more than a rasp as he says, “soobin, i’ll fucking kill you.” he’s surprised at how much he means it, because right now, he really could imagine stringing his dearest friend up like prized game; but soobin’s phone has long been forgotten, tangled up in his sheets as he continues to sloppily fuck you.
“you feel so goddamn good,” soobin growls. “gonna fill you up, sweetheart.”
you cry out wantonly, and finally, finally, beomgyu hangs up and rips his phone away from his ear as if it burns him. he’s panting now, and he’s unsure why, but his hands are shaking as he throws his poor phone at the bathroom wall, watching it shatter with reddened eyes.
he won’t let you and soobin do this to him.
-
you’re fast asleep after your passionate indulgence with soobin, snugly curled up in his sheets wearing nothing other than one of his t-shirts. soobin smiles down at you before pressing a kiss to your sweaty forehead, murmuring something about loving you. his head whips up when he hears his front door unlocking, and he carefully extricates himself from your tangled limbs, but he’s not quite fast enough to intercept beomgyu before he enters the bedroom.
beomgyu is shaking with rage in a way soobin has never seen him do, but if beomgyu had the capacity to comprehend it, he’d notice that soobin seems surprisingly calm in what should theoretically be an unsettling situation.
beomgyu, though, is too shaken to wrap his mind around anything except for the sight of you curled up in his best friend’s bed. it’s a brutal confirmation of what he already knew, but wanted to deny. beomgyu can't bring himself to leave the bedroom, but he keeps his voice as low as he can despite his rage. he does not understand why.
“you fucking bastard. you’re supposed to be my best friend, how could you do this? you’ve been fucking my girl’s best friend for god knows how long now, and you didn’t think to tell me?” beomgyu snarls, his voice low and dripping with venom.
“this has nothing to do with you,” soobin says flatly.
“has nothing to do with me? she may be a fucking loser, but she’s family to me, and you turned around and fucked her without asking me first?” beomgyu is filled with righteous indignation, and soobin’s incomprehensible demeanor shifts from dismissive to awed.
soobin silently stares at beomgyu with wide eyes and a gaping mouth before he incredulously asks, “oh my god, you really don't get it, do you? even after all this time… jesus, you’re either stupid or in denial.”
“what the fuck are you talking about?” beomgyu says fiercely, but soobin only sighs in exasperation.
“beomgyu, i knew you were clueless, but i didn’t think you were this clueless. look, she’s your girlfriend’s ‘best friend’, and even that is debatable, and you’re just the guy who happens to be dating her friend. so what? you won’t marry minji, won’t even officially move in with her, even after all of her ‘hints’ for ages now, so what exactly makes you family?” beomgyu falters at soobin’s words, but he doesn't back down. not yet.
“because i’ve known her for years! i’m still a part of her life, and she… she’s basically like family to me. i mean, i see her every day, i’m at every fucking holiday with her, every family dinner, and i know her better than you do.” beomgyu feels a bit pathetic having to explain his place in your life like this, but the words are still asserted with conviction. his next words, though, are not. “and she’s… she’s not like all your other flings. she’s not supposed to deal with bastards like you who only want to use her.”
soobin, again, sighs.
“there’s only so much shit you can do behind your ‘protective brother figure��� bullshit, but if you want to go there, we can go there. what kind of brother figure jerks off to his sister figure after he gets done fucking his girlfriend? and don’t lie, because i used to live with you, and i’ve heard you whine her name in the bathroom a million times.” beomgyu turns beet red as his jaw drops in sheer shock at the brazen accusation, no matter how true it may be; but soobin is not near finished.
“and what guy threatens every man who ever takes an interest in a girl that's 'basically his sister’ before they can even say anything to her? you’ve been doing that shit since college, beomgyu, and the real reason you’re so scared to see her with someone else is partly because you’re terrified that they’ll turn out to be exactly what you are: obsessed—not because you’re waiting for the right guy.” beomgyu opens his mouth to retort, but he finds any words he might say dying in his throat before they can quite make it through his lips. soobin continues matter-of-factly, no room for debate.
“the rest of it is because you want to be the right guy for her, but you know you can’t be, because to her, you’re just the asshole who’s shacking up with the girl she’s hated all her life. you won’t live with minji, because that means you two would probably have to live alone, so you wouldn't be able to see the person you really want. and you won’t marry minji, because then, things would really be over, and you’d have no chance.”
beomgyu feels like he can’t breathe, let alone speak, at soobin’s merciless deconstruction of his repressed feelings. he desperately wants to deny it, but when he looks at your sleeping form, the only thing he wants even more desperately is to hold you. you look so devastatingly beautiful like this, and he would say he wants to see you like this forever, but that’s not true. what he really wants is for your eyes to flutter open just to look at him, and for him to be the only one you see, just like you’re the only one he sees. he wants you to sleepily smile up at him before letting him touch you, hold you, kiss you, just like he’s wanted from the day he first met you. his eyes turn red as they begin to ache with unshed tears.
beomgyu swallows thickly as he feebly chokes out his next words.
“i know. i know i'm… i’m a coward. but i love her. what am i supposed to do?” despite soobin’s unforgiving speech, beomgyu has no one else to turn to with this. he momentarily forgets that the man he’s pleading for guidance from is the very man who’s taken you away from him. and that man is now irritated.
“you're not getting it,” soobin scoffs. “you already have no chance, and you never will. instead of just approaching her like a fucking normal person, you were too much of a coward to risk being rejected, and because of that, you’ll never be anything to her. i’m not going to sit here and help you win my girlfriend over. you don't deserve her, and even if you did, i still wouldn't help you.”
… girlfriend? girlfriend? soobin is many things, a man-whore being one of them, so beomgyu had assumed soobin was just hooking up with you behind his back. truthfully, the thought of anyone in this world having you in that way, the way beomgyu never could, makes him feel like he’s going to vomit; but to know that you’re not just one of soobin’s flings, to know that soobin sees what beomgyu’s seen in you since the moment he first laid eyes on you… that’s what truly makes him feel like he’s going to be fucking sick.
he's angry. of course, he's angry. but more than angry, he's distraught. he’s never felt so stripped bare—naked and vulnerable for anyone with eyes to see—his usual arrogance failing to cover the ugliness that's been the crux of his true nature for longer than he can remember. he’s been exposed, belly up, with his insides torn out and put on display like a fucking frog stuck under a microscope. and all the while, soobin has been sitting and watching beomgyu squirm as he futilely tries to free himself.
“so, you… you knew how i felt this entire time, and you still got with her?” beomgyu chokes out between strained breaths. this makes soobin pause, and for the first time, he looks like he feels somewhat guilty for what he’s done.
“... yeah. yeah, i did. i thought, well, if you're never going to do anything, why can’t i? i… i’m sorry.” beomgyu knows soobin is not a malicious person, and deep down, he knows he can't blame soobin for seizing the chance to be with you. if he were in soobin’s shoes, if he had a fraction of his bravery, he’d have done the exact fucking same. but still. still, how could soobin do this to him? he could have chosen anyone else in this world, just not you. anyone but you.
“sorry? you’re sorry? you just sat there and fucking ripped me apart, and now you're telling me you’re sorry?” beomgyu accuses with a bitter laugh, his voice unconsciously raising with every word. how could soobin make him confront his unrequited love for you only to rip it out from underneath him? soobin’s supposed to be his best friend, and now he's stealing the love of his life away. but then, he supposes you were never really his in the first place. he's panting now, flushed and angry and at the very precipice of snapping into something unrecognizable.
soobin pauses before he placatingly says, “look, i know you're overwhelmed right now, and i know you're hurting. but you—”
“are you seriously trying to fucking level with me right now?” and he's pretty much shouting now. “you don't love her the way i love her. you don't even fucking know her. i know everything about her. i know what she loves, what she hates, what she eats, what her favorite words are, what kind of medicine she prefers to take when she's feeling sick. i know fucking everything about her. you don't love her like that, you can't love her like that. nobody can love her like that, besides me!” how dare soobin say beomgyu doesn't deserve you? beomgyu has hurt you, yes, but he still loves you the most. he loves you so much, it hurts.
beomgyu feels his restless fingers aching, and though he's never really been much of a fighter, he wants to wrap them around soobin’s neck to choke some sense into him.
but then, he hears the bed creaking. you're awake.
you rub your eyes before you sit up with the sheet precariously clasped to your chest, looking disheveled and beautiful and like everything beomgyu’s ever wanted. you're tired from your activities with soobin, but you're also a little disoriented from the wine you two drank earlier. your voice is hoarse when you ask, “beomgyu? what are you doing here? what the fuck’s going on?”
beomgyu feels his heart clench in his chest at the sight of you. he wants to shush you and cradle you to his chest as he coaxes you back to sleep, but you're not in his bed, you're in soobin's. with a longing he's never acknowledged before, he gently pleads, “c'mon, get up and get dressed. i'm getting you out of here.”
the fog over your mind clears and your eyes widen as you finally grasp how potentially cataclysmic this situation is. beomgyu is probably pissed that you're dating his best friend, and who knows what kind of machinations minji will create to tear you two apart when she finds out. you already kind of resent your parents, so if she spreads lies to them about soobin, you wouldn't really mind cutting them off; but how would that make soobin feel? and if minji wants to destroy your reputation to soobin’s friends and family, you know she'll have no trouble doing it. soobin would try to defend you, of course, but you don't want to put him through that.
beomgyu’s deeper intentions fly over your head, and you warily hiss, “what do you want from us?”
beomgyu’s breath grows even more ragged when soobin’s shirt slips off your shoulder and he sees the mark he left on your neck. god, he wants to scrub every trace of soobin off of you, wants to erase every memory of soobin's treacherous touch from your mind. he wants to occupy every cell of your body, wants to make you forget about every other man who's dared to touch you. he tries to force the thought of what you two and soobin were doing before he got here out of his mind, but his eyes are watery as he pleads, “i want you to come home with me, okay? please? we need to get out of here, we can’t—”
“i’m not going anywhere with you,” you snap. “you're not my fucking family, you're not even my friend. you don't get to tell me what to do.”
“don't say that, and please… please don't look at me like that.” beomgyu is fully crying now, and the haze of shock finally makes you register how distraught he looks. you're about to ask what the fuck is happening yet again, but he says something you could never imagine he’d say.
“i love you. all i want to do is love you. please, just let me show you how much i need you, okay? just come home with me—i'm begging you.”
… love? as a pseudo-sister-in-law? you want to believe that's the case, because no matter how far-fetched the notion is, it's still a million times more believable than a romantic explanation. but even so, you simply can't dismiss the way he's looking at you like he needs you to breathe, which is certainly not platonic, let alone familial.
you're absolutely rendered speechless, and you look to soobin for silent confirmation; but he's not calm, cool, and collected like he’d usually be. he grabs the trembling beomgyu by the collar and drags him out of his apartment. after he pushes beomgyu out of the door, he yells, “i don't give a shit about your fucked up feelings, leave us the fuck alone!”
beomgyu is far too stunned and distressed to comprehend what's happening until the door is slammed in his face, but when his mind finally catches up, he goes from distressed to hysterical. he's bawling now, tears streaming down his reddened cheeks as he hiccups pleas to you—and threats to soobin—from outside the door amidst his frantic knocks.
but it's not enough. he can't hear if you two are shuffling around or talking about him, even when he presses his ear to the door and tries to shush his own cries before going back to pounding on the sturdy wood. before any progress can be made—if such progress were even possible—apartment security is dragging him out of the complex and warning him not to return unless he wants to be thrown in jail.
beomgyu trudges back to his apartment. it's quite a bit of a walk from soobin’s place, but he would rather stumble home than call for a ride and risk someone seeing him like this. he cries until he can't cry anymore, and he's still shattered about it all when he finally makes it home. all he wants to do is pass out in his bed so he can briefly forget any of tonight ever happened, but he knows he'll somehow end up producing a few more waves of tears before he can do that. he unlocks his front door and he can already feel his eyes preparing for more tears to fall.
but, like always, minji has a nearly preternatural knack of appearing when he wants to see her even less than he already does.
“beomie, baby, what's wrong?” she asks concernedly as she walks up to him from her spot on his couch and fusses over him. he knows he looks utterly defeated, like he's just got done being steamrolled, and she seems eager to console him. in a way, he thinks she's probably a bit happy to see him so vulnerable, because he never is in front of her; but he doesn't have the time to dwell on that.
he's not really sure what to say, honestly. how does he verbalize tonight's events? how does he tell her soobin uprooted his most twisted feelings for the girl minji has an equally-twisted relationship with? he decides that the best thing to do is to let her go, and that he needs to tell her the truth for once. he sighs and pries her gentle hands off of him.
“minji, i need to tell you something,” he says shakily.
“what is it, babe?” she asks with furrowed brows. “what's got you so worked up?”
he pauses and bites his lip as he tries to figure out how to word things delicately. he may not like her very much, but she still deserves better than what he's given her. he settles on telling her, “i think we should break up. i just don't… don't think i'm the right person for you. i'm sorry.”
surprisingly, she laughs. “don’t be stupid, you are the right person for me, just like i'm the right person for you.”
beomgyu blinks as he tries to process her reaction. he finds his voice and tries again. “no, i'm not. and no, you aren't. i—”
“why?” minji interrupts. “because of your weird obsession with my ‘best friend’?”
beomgyu is speechless for the millionth time tonight. all he can seem to squeeze out of his throat is, “w-what?”
“you heard me,” she shoots back, disturbingly calmly. “what, did you finally tell her how you feel and get rejected?”
“... what the fuck?” beomgyu gasps, too taken aback to say anything else.
“it's been a long time coming, i guess, but i could’ve saved you the suspense and told you what she'd say,” she snorts. “you didn't have to get all worked up over nothing.”
“you… you’ve known about it all these years, and you never said anything? what the fuck is wrong with you?!” he exclaims. did everyone in the world know besides you and him? he hates the very idea of it. he hates that he's been suffering in silence, and hates that you’ve never cared enough to notice.
minji has been incredibly tame during this bizarre discussion, but now, she’s hurt, and she’ll say anything at all to hurt him back.
“oh, please, beomgyu,” she sneers with a grating, teary laugh. “you were so fucking obvious with everything you ever did. the way your eyes trail after her like a goddamn puppy, the way you never want to hang out at your place instead of mine, the way you always get so pissed off when she wears a skirt that’s a little too short. do you think i’m stupid? do you think i don't realize that touching me makes you fucking sick? come on, beomie, you make that pretty goddamn clear with the way you only ever fuck me with the lights off, and how you only really want to touch me when she can hear us.”
beomgyu feels like he might throw up, or maybe even pass out, he’s not sure, but he thinks he’ll find out soon. he’s utterly humiliated and disgusted with himself to a level he previously couldn’t fathom, even more so than before, but he just can’t wrap his head around one last thing.
“then why did you stay with me if you’ve known how i feel this entire time?” he asks weakly, and she lets out a scoff at his cluelessness.
“because i love you. because you belong to me. we just make sense together. she doesn't deserve someone like you, i do.” she says it like it's the most natural thing in the world—like she's mulled over her ridiculous reasoning a million times over, and she has.
“you’re… you’re fucking crazy. you don't—”
“beomgyu, be reasonable. look at her, then look at me. nobody else in the goddamn world would pick her over me!” her words falter a bit as she says that, a few pesky tears unconsciously escaping her beautiful eyes; but she composes herself enough to continue. “listen, i know you think i'm a crazy bitch, but don't you get that i'm the only one who really understands you? i know who you really are, and it doesn't bother me. as long as you take your feelings for her and put them towards me, i won't be disgusted by you like she is. i'll accept you, no matter what. don't you want that?”
“why the fuck would i want someone like you?!” he snarls. “you're—”
“i’m what?” she asks as tears finally fall freely from her eyes. “insane? i hate to be the one who has to break it to you, but you're just as bad as me. that's why we suit each other. from the start, you’ve only ever seen her, not me. it’s not fucking fair that she gets to have you when she doesn't even have to try! she doesn't have to try to take you from me, she doesn't have to try to get people to like her, she doesn't have to try at all. i try so hard to be perfect for you, and here you are, telling me you don't want to be with me because of someone who doesn't even like you.”
no, no, no. this isn't how it's supposed to be. his world has been thrown off its axis in the span of one night, and he’d rather fucking die than hear another word. minji latched onto him because she couldn't comprehend someone wanting you over her, and in her own way, she loves him. and you… you're with soobin because beomgyu is a coward above all else. he wants to go back in time and never call soobin tonight, he wants to live in the thinly-veiled ignorance he's been occupying for years now, he wants to be the person he thought he was mere hours ago. lastly, he wants to feel used by minji, but he doesn't even deserve the dignity to feel that way, because he was using her right back.
“get out,” he murmurs.
“beomie, come the fuck on. you’re letting your emotions get to your head. think about what you're doing!” minji borderline shrieks.
“you're right, you know,” beomgyu replies after a pause, and minji is temporarily relieved. she steps closer to him and tries to reach for his face, but he snatches her hands and keeps them in his firm grip as he continues. “i'm just as crazy as you are, but that doesn't make me want you. i hate myself, but i hate you, too. all your life, you've been trying so hard to be better than her, but no matter what you do, you can't force me to want you. i love her, and i'd rather keep wanting and never having her than keep pretending that i can fucking stand being around you. now get out,” he growls as he forces her out of his apartment and slams the door in her lovely face.
-
if beomgyu really thinks about it, he's always teetered right on the brink of knowing the truth, but he's been successful in fooling himself just enough to keep his feelings tamped down. when minji made a mocking comment about you losing your virginity in college, he'd gone home and cried, but he told himself it was because of the stress of finals looming over him. when he consequently spread a rumor about you being a mediocre fuck around campus, he told himself it was because anyone who'd believe him simply didn't deserve you. and when he'd zoom into the background of photos taken with minji just to get a better look at you, he told himself he was simply scrutinizing your appearance.
every time he stole your panties, he'd blame it on the taboo principle of it all rather than it explicitly having to do with you in particular. every time he’d get turned on only when you were around, he'd blame it on some secret exhibitionist kink he didn't know he had. every time he’d pretend to come in his condom during yet another unsatisfying fuck with minji, he reasoned that he was only pounding into his fist in the bathroom while imagining it was you because… well, he didn't really read into his actions for fear of what he might find.
it's a miracle he was able to live in denial for so long, and he should be grateful that the truth didn't come out sooner. still, as the weeks since the night he pathetically confessed his feelings to you pass by, he doesn't feel grateful in the slightest. he could stalk you, probably. he could threaten soobin and make him pay for what he's done. there are a million twisted things he could do to get you back in his sight, but he doesn't want to do any of them. because you wouldn't like them. because you might hate him even more than you already do. and if he's learned anything from minji, it's that you can't force someone to love you in any meaningful way.
so, he rots. he wakes up alone, goes to work on autopilot, comes straight home and drinks until he's incoherent, then goes to sleep, well, alone. he should probably try to go back to how he was before he met you, but he feels like that was another life—like he was a different person. time seems to be split before and after he met you, as much as it pains him to admit it.
it's a lonely, rainy night like any other when he's home late from work. he’s been here more in the past month than he has since he began dating minji, but he's adjusting to his newly single life as well as he can. the apartment is devoid of many personal pieces, furnished sparsely and lacking any real character. he cracks open a bottle of whiskey and begins drinking directly from it, not bothering to even use a glass. he sits on his uncomfortable couch, like he always does, and thinks about all the things he's done wrong. he doesn't even get the chance to get tipsy when he hears a knock on his door.
it's probably minji again. she's come by a few times since he dumped her, and while he could probably get a restraining order or something, he kind of enjoys seeing her suffer the way he suffered. it's not healthy, he knows, but it's one of the few forms of pleasure he feels these days. something is different tonight, though. the knocking isn't frantic, it's almost hesitant, and it doesn't last for very long. he furrows his eyebrows, and for some reason, he shoots up from the couch and rushes towards the door. his breath catches when he looks through the peephole.
there you are, standing awkwardly—almost like you're not even sure why you're there. you're drenched from the rain, and one of your arms is wrapped protectively around yourself as the other reaches towards the door, perfectly poised to knock again. just before your fist can quite make it to the door, you pause and retract it—folding it on top of your other arm. you stand still for a moment, and beomgyu is simply too stunned to move. at least, he is until you turn and begin to walk away.
with a speed he didn't even know he possessed until now, he wrenches the door open and grabs your arm before you can even react.
“wait,” he pants, not from exertion, but from adrenaline. “what… what are you doing here?”
he thinks he sees you gulp, but that could just be wishful thinking. your lips part and close again a few times before you manage to ask, “can we talk?”
“y-yeah, of course. um, come in,” he stammers awkwardly as he reluctantly releases his hold on you.
what is this? some kind of psychological torture? you’ve never sought beomgyu out until now, which should give him a spark of hope, but he knows better than to delude himself.
he steps away from the doorway to let you in and lightly shuts the door behind you. he clears his throat and asks, “if you're—do you need anything? a towel, maybe, or clothes. and i have… i have water, if you want. i mean, if you're thirsty.” he hates how fucking stupid he sounds right now, but it's almost like he can't stop talking.
you're quiet for a moment before asking, “can i have some clothes and a towel?”
his eyes widen a bit before he eagerly nods. “o-oh, yeah. just give me a second.” he tries not to sprint to his room, and he prays to god that he has clean pajamas for you. luckily, he's able to find something suitable. he returns to the living room and offers the clothes and towel to you with trembling hands. “here,” he says. “you can change in the bathroom down the hall. i… i’ll put your clothes in the dryer, okay?”
you purse your lips and nod. he watches you pad down the hallway until you're no longer visible. he lets out a deep breath he didn't realize he was holding and seats himself on his stone slab of a couch. fuck, he should’ve gotten a better one like minji nagged him to. also, he’s been meaning to wipe down his bathroom mirror for a while. most importantly, though, what the fuck are you doing here?
he doesn't have time to dwell on it before you're walking back into the living room. his eyes snap up, and he feels a lump in his throat when he sees his clothes on you. his clothes, not soobin’s this time. it feels like he's hallucinating, to be perfectly honest, but he's fine with that. he just hopes the illusion continues.
it’s all too real when you plop down on the couch beside him, maintaining a respectful distance. fortunately, the couch is not only hard as concrete, but small to boot, so you end up only being a few inches away. maybe it isn't so bad after all. his thoughts are halted when you clear your throat and speak.
“soobin, uh… well, he told me everything he knows, but i just… i mean, i wanted to hear it from you,” you stammer. he knows exactly what you’re talking about, but he wishes he didn't.
“what do you want to know?” he asks in resignation.
“everything,” you tell him, and he purses his lips with a stiff nod. he's had plenty of time to think about the unfortunate circumstances that led him to his sorry state, so the words tumble out of his mouth before he can stop them.
“i’ve always thought that you were so… so pretty. i saw you laughing with your friends on the way to class one day, and i knew i wanted you to look at me like that. and when i listened to you talk to your friends, i thought you were so smart, funny, and… and nice.” his lips are turned up in a wistful smile, and his eyes are uncharacteristically gentle. “but you never saw me, not really. you just saw me as minji’s friend, and i thought—i don't know—that if i just hung around her more, you'd warm up to me. i don't even think you remember, but i tried to be nice to you, to include you in conversation, to stand up for you. i swear to god, i did. but… but i saw the way you looked at someone else one day in the library. i remember it so clearly—you actually smiled at him and laughed at his jokes, and he wasn't even trying like i was. i was so fucking angry, but i thought i could make you see me if i made you as jealous as you made me, and i thought that there was nobody better to do it with than the girl you hate the most.”
oh, god. you actually feel… kind of guilty? is guilty even the word? you haven't done anything wrong, you know that, but you feel like you've unintentionally twisted the knife in his chest with your apathy. for as much as you've always wanted him to drop his antagonizing demeanor, you don't like how pitiful he looks right now. “beomgyu, i…”
“yeah, i know. i was wrong,” he continues, his soft smile twisting into a self-deprecating one. “i went from being nothing to less than nothing, and it just… it made me desperate. so, i kept trying, got mean; but you never cared, no matter what i did. i guess i thought that if i could never have you, maybe i should stay with minji, because then i could make you feel something for me. even if it was only hatred and disgust—anything was better than nothing.”
“beom—” you begin to say, but he's so lost in his feelings, so lost in the foreign sensation of talking to you and actually having you listen to him, he can't stop himself.
“i just wanted you to pay attention to me. and i could—you know—keep an eye on you. but you… you don't give a shit about me, you don't even consider me as a man,” he laughs. “if i think about it, maybe i was trying to make myself an option for you, at least, and that i could show you what you're missing if i tried hard enough. but you could never actually see me that way, and… and it's all my fault.” he lets out another harsh laugh, making you wince.
“i… i didn't know,” you say awkwardly. he takes a shaky breath before continuing.
“i've been begging for you just to give me scraps of you, because i thought it'd be better than nothing. all i ever wanted was for you to at least consider me, but you don't, you never did, and because of what i've done, you never will. i know i was wrong, i know everything is my fault; but i just wanted to be important to you, can't you understand that?” his eyes are pleading like they were when you last saw him. he's not asking for much, not even really asking for anything, and for some reason, it hurts your heart a bit.
because beomgyu is right, of course. you’ve never really cared about him, but that's not all of it, is it? you were resolved to your indifference before he even uttered a word to you, and while the disgust you've always felt for him is his fault, can you truthfully say that you’d have given him the time of day if he were nice to you? probably not, because of his association with minji. in your mind, there was no reason he’d like you if he knew her first, so his intentions were rejected before he could ever even understand them.
“i really didn't know,” is all you can think to repeat.
“i know,” he says with a bitter smile. you lick your lips before continuing.
“but i do know that i wouldn't have liked you even if you were nice to me. i don't… i don't talk to guys who are involved with minji. there's just… no point, i guess. and she liked you, and i thought you liked her, so… so i didn’t bother to get to know you.” beomgyu’s eyes are watery, but he retains his smile. he was doomed from the start, it seems.
“i should’ve just talked to you myself instead of using her to get close to you,” he whispers.
“yeah,” you reply, and his smile finally drops; but what else could you possibly say? if he hadn't gotten involved with minji, you'd have probably liked him. he's handsome, of course, and you can't deny that he's funny. and, well, you two do seem to have a lot in common based on what you know from small talk he'd make with your parents during family dinners.
“i'm sorry,” he murmurs. “i'm really, really sorry. even if you didn't like me, even if you never would've no matter what, i shouldn't have treated you the way i did. i don't blame you for hating me, and i should be grateful you haven't done anything other than ignore me.” he means what he says, but it doesn't sound like it, because he doesn't feel grateful at all. he feels utterly hopeless. in the end, your indifference was more painful than any intentional retaliation could’ve been.
you are silent. he's not trying to make you feel sorry for him, and you know it, but that makes you feel even sorrier. you're still struggling to form an appropriate response when he breaks the silence.
“i like listening to you talk,” he blurts out, making your eyes widen. “well, you don't really talk to me, but i overhear you a lot. i like listening to everything you say, and i like the way you say it. i like how you look, how you dress, how you laugh. and i… i like how you see the world.”
“don't you think i'm a little pessimistic?” you ask, your lips subconsciously curling up in a small smile. of all the things beomgyu could tell you he likes about you, that is truly something you never anticipated.
“i think it makes you interesting,” he says quickly, his smile tentatively returning.
you let out a soft laugh—the first one you've ever directed at him—and he can't help but straighten up with a bit of pride at having made you happy, even if just a little.
after your laughter, though, you think back on all the things you've wanted to ask beomgyu since that night at soobin’s. you know he'll tell you the truth, so you ask, “... were you the one who messed with my stuff?”
“yeah,” he replies with no hesitation. the sheer ecstasy of your attention makes him quite forthcoming, no matter how ugly the answers to your questions may be.
“even my panties?” well, that one is a bit more difficult to answer.
“... yeah,” he sheepishly mumbles after a pause, but his next words are hurried. “and everything soobin said i did, i did. scaring guys away, being an asshole to you for attention, uh, jerking off to you in the bathroom… all of it. i know i'm fucked up, and i know i probably scare you, but i would never hurt you. i just want to love you. i just… i want you to care about me.”
you take a breath and begin, “i—”
“wait! before you say anything, i just want you to know, it's… it's okay if you don't like me,” you can tell the words are like lead in his mouth, “but can't you just acknowledge me a little bit?” christ, he's so pathetic. you're not used to him being so… sweet? to you, but maybe you could be.
for as much as beomgyu has been thinking about his failed confession, you can't lie and say you haven't been thinking about it, too. you really did love soobin, but there was always a bit of reservation on both of your parts—a quiet kind of affection that you were happy to let grow organically; but your love was never all-consuming, never desperate, never aching. but beomgyu… beomgyu looks like he'd prostrate himself at your feet if it meant you'd give him the time of day, and he would.
“i can,” you say simply, and his eyes widen.
“you… you can? what do you—”
“i can pay attention to you. i can care about you.”
his face tenses and his adam’s apple bobs. his voice is strained when he asks, “what are you saying?”
“i'm saying, i’m willing to get to know you the way you know me. i just want to see how things go, because… i don't know, i kind of... like how weird you are.”
elation, triumph, and sheer relief overwhelm him. he doesn't want to ask his next question, but he feels like he has to. “what about soobin?”
you purse your lips and answer, “we… we broke up. no hard feelings, we just kind of realized we wanted different things out of our relationship, i guess.”
“oh, thank god,” he murmurs as he releases a shaky breath. theoretically, he should at least offer perfunctory condolences, but you two are way past such insincerity. you both know he's over the moon right now, and he's spent more than enough time lying.
only now do you notice that he's somehow managed to scoot closer and closer to you until your legs are touching without your knowledge. the clothing between you doesn't do anything to tamp down the buzzing sensation at the tentative contact. you look back up at him to meet his gaze, and his eyes are trained on you like you're the only person in the world. now that you think about it, you’ve caught glimpses of this kind of focus before—the kind of focus in which he looks at you as if everything and everyone else besides you has faded away.
his gaze flicks from your eyes down to your lips before refocusing. he leans in so close, you can see every minute detail of his face. long lashes, round eyes, slightly-chapped lips he keeps on licking from sheer nervousness.
his voice is barely above a whisper when he asks, “please, can i…” he doesn't dare to finish his question, so there it hangs, unspoken yet unfathomably heavy.
it’s like there’s a strange sort of magnetic pull drawing you to him. before you can recount all of the reasons why this is a bad idea—at least, so soon—you tell him, “okay.”
that's more than enough, it seems, because in a flash, beomgyu cups your cheeks in his big, warm hands and tenderly traces his thumb along your jaw before pulling you in.
the first meeting is pure electricity. your lips immediately slot together as if they were always meant to be that way—as if everything else was simply an obstacle leading to this inevitability. the hums of energy you feel at your clothed legs touching is nothing compared to the way every nerve in your body is set ablaze right now. you feel him shudder before he reluctantly pulls away. his eyes never leave yours, and the look in his eyes is so intense—so hungry—you feel breathless under its weight.
“thank you, i've been wanting to do that for forever,” he mutters breathlessly, and he should be finished by now, but his hands remain on your face. he gently pushes your hair behind your ears before adding, “can i… can i show you what else i've been wanting to do? i swear, i'll be perfect, and i'll stop whenever you want. i know it's fast to you, but it's not to me. i just… i want you to feel how much you mean to me. but… but i won't push you.” he’s serious about that, you know, but he looks like he'll die if you don't let him prove himself to you. his cheeks are flushed, and if his squirming weren't enough, the obvious tent in his sweatpants tells you everything you need to know.
for the second time tonight, you take a deep breath and say, “okay.”
“oh,” he groans as he pulls you back in for another kiss. this one is much more fierce, utterly insatiable. his tongue licks your bottom lip, begging for entry, and you eagerly oblige. he moans into your mouth as his tongue tangles with yours, trying to commit every centimeter to memory. he’s embarrassingly hard humiliatingly fast, but he’s fantasized about this for so long, who can blame him?
when you two break for air, his eyes are darkened with lust as he gulps and asks, “can i—”
before he can finish, you cut him off by palming him through his sweatpants. the groan he releases is utterly guttural and animalistic in nature, and you carefully add, “do whatever you want.”
his breath catches in his throat at the permission, and with shaky hands and unsteady steps, he leads you to his bedroom. you're on the bed in an instant, and in mere moments, he's stripped you of the clothes he gave you to wear. you feel a bit uncomfortable, honestly, knowing he’s probably comparing you to minji; but before you can dwell on it, he's gulping and reverently whispering, “you're the most beautiful thing i've ever seen.”
before you even have the time to feel shy or embarrassed, his hands are all over you—your chest, your hips, your ass—but he won't let himself get lost in clumsy touches and lose sight of his ultimate goal: making you feel better than you ever have. he kisses down your jaw and throat before planting a searing mark at the base of your neck. he soothes the sting with his tongue, outwardly apologizing for the slight pain, but internally, he's buzzing with excitement at the prospect of leaving something tangible on you—something that ties you to him.
his mouth purposefully trails down to your chest, sucking on one peak and teasing the other before switching over. he beams into your chest when he hears you moan. slowly, he pops his mouth off and briefly kisses you again before planting kisses down your stomach, and finally, finally, finally, to your core. you're not sure how much time has passed, but you do know you've never been so wet before in your life. he spreads your legs open and groans when he sees you glistening for him. then, he looks up at you with watery eyes. there's yet another question there, you can see it, so you spread your legs a bit wider in a silent invitation.
suddenly, his lips are buried in your folds. he leaves kisses, but try as he might, he doesn't have the wherewithal to control his hunger. when he takes his first lick, you feel an infernal heat beginning to consume you completely. he moans in pure ecstasy when he tastes you, and you can feel the vibrations reverberating through your cunt, your legs, your entire body.
“so fucking good,” he whispers, his breath warm against your naked lips, and that's all the warning you get before he begins to lick you and suck up your slick as if he were a starving man.
you can't help but writhe beneath him as his tongue circles over your clit, and he removes one of the hands he was using to keep you spread open for him and presses it on your lower stomach to keep you in place. his other arm remains firmly locked around your thigh, nearly bruising you with his desperate grip. men do not usually treat giving head to women as if women are showing them the greatest kindness of their lives by allowing them to, but he clings to you so hungrily, you know that in his mind, you are.
you begin to reach your peak far too quickly, and you think you moan something about being close—you're not really sure—when he slides his tongue into your hole and begins to thrust it in and out. his nose remains buried in your cunt, and you let out a cry of his name as patches of white explode behind your eyelids. he looks up at you as you come, his eyes shining with amazement and, strangely, gratitude.
as you're coming down, he licks his upturned lips and dazedly whispers, “i made you feel good, right?”
you let out a soft laugh and breathlessly reply, “yes, that was… you made me feel really good. so… what else do you want to show me?”
his eyes go from innocent to dark again as he processes your words. he anxiously bites his lip as he slowly pulls off his shirt, then his sweatpants and boxers. his cock is painfully hard, pathetically leaking with precum and even redder than usual—because of the way he was humping the bed mere moments ago as you were lost in the haze of getting the best oral of your life.
it’s pretty, just like every other part of him, and you have no doubt that he'll stretch you out nearly beyond what you'll be able to handle. it twitches traitorously with need as he stares at you, still dripping into his previously-crisp sheets. he unsteadily grabs his base and looms over you as he begins to tease himself up and down your cunt. he shudders at the contact, but he keeps his eyes locked with yours. he wants to watch every minuscule movement in your face as he finally, finally makes you understand how much he can do for you.
he begins to push in, one hand braced beside your head as his fat tip breaches your entrance. you both let out strangled cries at the insertion, and it takes every ounce of willpower and luck he can muster to not come immediately. he's jerked his cock raw for countless nights wishing he were fucking you, and here you are, looking up at him like he's the only thing you see. just like he's always longed for. it's an intoxicating sensation.
“you're so fucking tight,” he groans as he works himself in. “so perfect around me.”
he draws himself out before thrusting in a little further. then again. then again. each time, he gains a bit more of you, splitting you open further and further with every movement of his hips. his veiny cock drags against the most pleasurable spot in your cunt every time. he's whimpering now, and he'd be shy in any other context, but not right now. he's fucking a girl raw for the first time, and not just any girl, the girl. the girl he’s wanted since… well, always. he couldn't care less about the fact that he sounds like a whore.
when he pulls out and slams back in again, he's finally completely sheathed in you. his eyes roll back in absolute pleasure as he lets out a guttural moan. you, on the other hand, feel so full, feel so right, you're writhing beneath him. with a shuddering breath, beomgyu pulls out almost completely before drilling into you again and again. his pace is frantic—carnal, even. when you thread your fingers in his hair, he lets out a desperate whine.
“you feel so—mm, fuck!—so perfect. squeezing me so fucking tight, i can't—oh, god!” he babbles as he pounds himself into you. he has just enough awareness to take his skilled fingers and roll your clit as he loses himself in you. he keeps up his brutal pace in an act of frenzy.
“never—nngh—never wanna stop,” he whines as tears begin to pool in his eyes. they fall completely when you wrap your arms around his neck and pull him in for a filthy kiss. he tastes like you, and you realize you like it that way. you realize you like how pathetic he is, how much he’s loved you all this time, how much he needs you. you break from him and sink your teeth into his neck like he did to you, marking him as your own, and he lets out an animalistic cry he did not know he was capable of making.
“fuck, yes, yes, yes!” he cries out as his aching balls slap against you with every thrust. “please, please come. need to feel you—ah!—feel you come on my cock.”
his gaze finally parts from yours to look at your stomach. how nice would it be to be one with you completely? as much as he wants to, he can't stay inside of you forever, can't enmesh his body with yours, but he can become a part of you in a different way. he can plant his seed in your stomach, can mix his dna with yours in a physical, living, breathing product of his love for you—if he's fortunate enough. that way, he’ll be tied to you the way he never wanted to be tied to minji, and you’ll be tied to him just the same. but you haven't even agreed to date him. you're just lost in lust, right?
“i’m… i’m gonna come,” he pants as he continues to work your clit and fuck you like a crazed man. “have to pull out.” the words are almost painful to say, but he grits his teeth and says them, anyway.
shockingly, you wrap your legs around his waist and say between labored breaths, “you don't have to.”
the whine he lets out is laughably emasculating, but he doesn't care. he fucks you even more fiercely and rolls your clit with even more desperation, and you can feel the tension in your stomach about to snap. you let out a broken moan of his name as you come undone beneath him, your mind flooding with nothing but unmarred bliss, and your cunt clenching around him so suffocatingly, he can barely even thrust.
“oh, sh-shit!” he cries out as his orgasm throws his world off-kilter. his cum floods your insides then—thick and hot—and he can feel you squeezing him for every last drop. he gives a few more weak thrusts before collapsing on top of you. you both pant in exhaustion, but once he catches his breath, he buries his face into the crook of your sweaty neck.
“i love you so fucking much,” he whispers, his breath making your skin tingle. he pulls away and looks up at you. “and you… you’ll love me back. i'll make sure everything—i won't let anything go wrong. and if minji tries anything, i'll ruin her fucking life. i swear, i'll be perfect. i'll be the perfect boyfriend, husband, father of—”
“tone down the crazy,” you warn as you lightly pinch his cheek.
“s-sorry, i just got excited,” he blushes. “but i mean it, you know? i won't waste this, i promise. i'll be good for you every day, and i’ll show you how much i love you until you feel the same way. and our family—i mean, your family, they might be mad, but we'll deal with whatever happens, okay? and if they can't accept us, then we always have my family. they won't treat you badly, i swear.” he means it. his family doesn't even really know minji, and when they did meet her, they didn't care for her.
beomgyu is looking at you with his watery, pleading eyes, and you know he'd give you the entire world if you let him. if yours and minji���s families hate you after this, he’ll be your family, and you kind of hate your family, anyway. he loves you, and oddly enough, you can really see things working out just as he says they will.
you can't help but let out a tired laugh. “okay, i believe you.”
he groans in relief as he kisses you again, deeply and tenderly and lovingly, and you can see yourself falling in love with him, too.
notes pt. 2: i hope u all liked this one! it's been a while since i've written beomgyu this way and i kinda missed him. ik i'm not the best at writing him but pls dont be mean. and again if u enjoyed this please leave feedback!
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#niningtori#freudian#beomgyu smut#beomgyu hard thoughts#beomgyu hard hours#txt smut#txt hard thoughts#txt hard hours#beomgyu fic#beomgyu ff#txt fic#txt ff#txt x reader#beomgyu x reader#beomgyu x you#txt x you#nini's hard hours
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Master and Apprentice || Sung Jin-woo (Part 1 of 3)
Siren!Jin-woo x Deaf!Omega!reader
A/N - Hello everyone! This fic was inspired by the lovely @forbidden-sunlight's siren!au. We both collaborated on this piece and it serves as a direct sequel to her imagine, so do be sure to check it out first! This story picks up right where her imagine left off.
╰┈➤ Chapter Index
🪸 Prequel by @forbidden-sunlight 🌊 Part 2: Two Intertwining Melodies 🦈Part 3: In a Sea of Fire
Content warnings: 18+ MDNI, mythical creatures au, canon divergent, a/b/o dynamics, afab!reader, suggestive themes, obsessive thoughts, slightly ooc Jin-woo (he's very reverent towards Ashborn), mentions of violence, death, and despair, forbidden romance (humans and sirens are natural enemies), eventual yandere!Jin-woo.
Word Count - 3.6k
Summary - Sung Jin-woo seeks answers about his potential mate from Ashborn in the deepest depths of the abyss.
Dividers by @anitalenia and @firefly-graphics
After what feels like an eternity, Jin-woo comes to an abrupt stop. He wasn’t tired in the slightest, but he couldn’t finish this journey unless he was in the right frame of mind. If he was going to face the sea monarch, Ashborn, then he needed to compose himself. He was his mentor’s prized disciple, after all.
Resolute in his decision, Jin-woo pinches his brow, shuts his eyes, and releases a deep, suffering sigh. He had to stop ruminating over the useless ‘what ifs’ of his current situation and focus on the matter at hand. You emitting pheromones in his presence was proof enough that you were a compatible mate, but this would be meaningless if you were unreceptive to him. It also begs the question, was humanity even capable of consorting with sirens? In search of an answer, he reminisces about the tales of old passed down by generations of his kin, as well as the many speculations made by humans.
No one knew the exact origins of his species. Most humans assumed the progenitors were Persephone’s handmaidens, punished by Demeter after Hades had taken her daughter to the underworld and forced her into becoming his queen. Some stories also claimed that seafoam birthed them, but Jin-woo scoffed at this particularly ridiculous rumor. A scholar had recently published an article on how sirens may actually be the offspring of the river deity Achelous and a divine songstress, citing notations from various mythos on this theory. In truth, reality was far simpler than any of these far-fetched narratives.
There was just no definitive explanation for the existence of sirens. They were not interchangeable with the peaceful denizens of the ocean, known as mermaids and mermen. While all fell under the umbrella of the term ‘merfolk,’ the sirens had a far more hostile and bloodstained relationship with humans.
Since time immemorial, his brethren were viewed as nothing but a scourge upon this world of humanity. Beautiful as a raging typhoon and every bit as devastating, the sirens served as harbingers of doom and destruction for those foolish enough to risk the perilous waters. Their heavenly voices were tantamount to the funeral dirges used to usher the dead into the afterlife. It would be understandable to believe that the sirens were the monsters in this baleful story. However, human nature at its core is fraught with wickedness, and men soon grew wise to the machinations of merfolk.
Odysseus was the first to survive an encounter with sirens. During his voyage to Ithaca, the cunning man had instructed his crew to plug their ears with beeswax, effectively blocking the intoxicating songs that had ended the lives of so many before them. Emboldened by the success of Odysseus’s scheme, other sailors began using this method to conquer the sea and establish trade routes. Within a matter of a couple hundred years, humans not only overcame their fear of sirens, but they also poached them. Huntsmen would capture, torture, and kill Jin-woo’s ancestors simply for crossing paths with them. Worse yet, these scoundrels would often murder merfolk solely to harvest their organs, bones, and scales. They would then use the defiled corpses as ingredients for commodities, medication, and even aphrodisiacs. It was truly grotesque, if not outright barbaric, and more than justified the ire his kind felt towards humanity. While they hunted for the noble sake of survival, men did it for bloodsport and money.
The horrific fates suffered by many of their beloved brothers and sisters particularly infuriated the alphas, with their robust constitutions and natural sense of leadership. With a thirst for vengeance, they began targeting and attacking ships, ports, and even beaches. The alphas considered any place or vehicle that harbored humans as eligible targets. The less temperamental betas remained neutral and avoided the bloodshed, opting to prey upon shoals of fish and other maritime animals instead. Omegas could not join in the hunt, as they were far too precious to lose. They were the most cherished and talented singers amongst the sirens and required around-the-clock protection because of their significant rarity. These were the origins of the current hierarchical structure Jin-woo adhered to.
After recalling the tumultuous history of his people in its entirety, Jin-woo clenches his fists until his knuckles turn white. This was so damn frustrating! Rather than granting him an understanding of his attraction, it just proved all the more why it was so illogical.
Defeated, Jin-woo raises his head, opens his eyes, and continues to swim.
Another hour passes before he finds himself at the ingress of Ashborn’s lair. His enigmatic teacher lived in almost complete obscurity. Devoid of any light, and enveloped by a suffocating aura, this nautical cavern intimidated all who dared to approach it. Well, almost all that is apart from Jin-woo. He effortlessly permeates the invisible barrier designed to keep intruders at bay and ventures into his master’s spiritual domain.

Despite being an ancient and powerful king of the sea, Ashborn made the strange decision to emulate a land-like environment in his personal chambers.
As Jin-woo manifests into the realm, his appearance gives way to a form more befitting of a land dweller. His tail separates into two legs, his scales smoothen into skin, and he loses the winged fins on his ears and back. Once finished with this metamorphosis, Jin-woo takes a deep breath. Fresh pine, grass, and flowers perfume the air as he’s greeted by a lush valley. It had been a while since he had visited, and the setting had required him to transform into a human. Interestingly, transfiguration was one of the first skills Ashborn taught him. Speaking of his mentor –
“My disciple, it is good to see you again, though you appear…troubled. Tell me, what ails you so?” A rumbling voice rings across the horizon, signaling Ashborn’s approach; the tenebrous essence of the powerful deity contrasting with the greenery of the land. He appears in front of Jin-woo as a great dark knight. Much like his surroundings, Ashborn’s current visage was nothing but an illusion. Even the bravest of warriors said that his lifelike image invoked sheer terror in their hearts.
Many speculate he possesses a massive stature, at least several leagues in height and breadth alone, with piercing eyes and endless tendrils of dark hair. Others claim he is the son of Poseidon, one of the twelve Olympians, and a God of destruction who presided over the sea. However, Jin-woo never once witnessed this side of his teacher in all the years he’s been under his mentorship. Ashborn certainly exuded dignity, but he still displayed a humble attitude. And without fail, he would always appear in that strange, armored suit whenever he was in Jin-woo’s presence.
“My teacher, I must ask for your help on an urgent matter,” Jin-woo starts, anxiously running his tongue across his bottom lip. “This morning, while I was scavenging, I stumbled across the unmistakable aroma of an unmarked omega. It…it was unlike anything I had ever experienced before. As if I was being beckoned by someone or something. I wanted, no, I needed to heed its call.”
Ashborn listens in silence, his expression indiscernible. Jin-woo continued.
“When I arrived, I was in front of a monstrosity of a ship – a yacht right by the sandbanks. At first, I assumed that someone had taken an unfortunate siren captive. But when I finally saw her–”
“You recognized she was human. Not only that, but she belongs to the lowest level of the hierarchy, an omega. Speak if I am wrong, my dear pupil.” Jin-woo lowers his head in shame, fringe obscuring his eyes. This action all but confirms it.
“I don’t know what to do or how to proceed, teacher. Everything I’ve learned about these creatures has made me detest them. But I can’t bring myself to hate her. How could this even be possible? We are not even of the same species. She’s my enemy, my prey…. At least, she’s supposed to be.” His voice lowers into a near whisper as he ends his confused rambling.
“And yet you don’t view her that way, do you child?” Ashborn poses a question he already knows the answer to but needs to hear in his pupil’s own words.
“No, I don’t,” Jin-woo replies grimly. “I yearn to know more about her. And not just that. I want to meet her, court her, and make her mine. If she’ll even have me, that is… So please, teacher, tell me if there is any meaning behind what I feel. Am I destined for something that bears no place in reality?”
Ashborn remains uncharacteristically quiet while faced with such a loaded question. All is eerily silent for a few moments, save for the cheerful chirping of the illusionary songbirds. At last, the monarch gazes at Jin-woo and gives him the answer he so desperately desires.
“It is entirely possible Sung Jin-woo, alpha of Jindo island, for I am proof of such a fantastical circumstance. My first and only love was also a human omega. A woman I devoted my entire being to over a millennium ago.”
Jin-woo’s eyes widened in shock at this revelation. His mentor had fallen in love at some point, and it was with a member of the human race? This was unheard of.
“I never knew you had a lover,” Jin-woo murmurs softly. “What was she like? Do you still remember everything about her after so many years?”
“Let me show you, my disciple. It is a tragic tale that words alone cannot properly convey.” With a wave of Ashborn’s hand, their surroundings began to morph and alter. The valley transforms into a spacious, yet quaint medieval village composed of several wooden houses with a bustling marketplace at its center.
When Jin-woo regains his bearings, he notices his mentor has also metamorphosized. A man with a sun kissed complexion, long dark hair, and a beard stands where he once stood. Though visibly unrecognizable, he was unmistakably Ashborn. A crimson cape was clasped to the pristine silver armor he wore. A paladin. Jin-woo recalls. He had some knowledge of the past lives of men through his rare excursions onto the Mainland. While disguised as a human, Jin-woo once traded in his goods for a textbook on history. He was loath to admit just how intriguing he had found it.
Ashborn speaks, his voice no longer resonating within the confines of shadowy steel.
“It was here in this village that I came across her. She was the only daughter of a peasant farmer. A strong-willed, rapscallion of a woman with a wit sharper than any blade. I can remember her beauty, her warmth, and her tenacity as clear and concise as the day we met.” He says with a wistful gaze. The scene then shifts to a woman in a pure white gown. Her eyes remained hidden, but it did nothing to impede upon her loveliness. The woman runs animatedly towards a man who looks identical to Ashborn’s borrowed likeness and leaps into his arms. The man then effortlessly spins her around before bringing her into a kiss. Jin-woo watches on, mesmerized by what was unfolding in front of him.
“I feared her rejection once she knew the truth of my identity,” Ashborn admits. “On the night we first made love, I finally revealed to her my status as ruler of the sea. However, it did not matter. She loved me wholly and unconditionally, regardless of who or what I was. Such was the strength of her resolve.” In the next instance, they return to the same valley from earlier. What differs this time is that the man and woman are there, unacknowledging of Jin-woo and Ashborn’s presence. Lost in their own special world. The woman has a flower crown on her head, and she sits on the grass, holding the man’s head in her lap. Both appear happy and at ease.
“For the first time in my existence, I experienced true contentment. I long to return to those days, but alas, our bliss did not last.”
Ashborn solemnly shuts his eyes as darkness overtakes the sky and rain falls. The man is now shown standing at a grave with an expression of anguish marring his face. The woman is nowhere to be seen, although Jin-woo knows exactly where she’s at.
“A plague was scourging the land and indiscriminately ending the lives of thousands. I tried to protect her with my magic, but it was to no avail. She fell gravely ill despite my best efforts. I discovered shortly thereafter that omegas were more susceptible to sickness than their contemporaries. If I had known beforehand, I would’ve brought her to the sea with me, away from that damned disease. But I was a fool who was willing to love and live with her as a man, not as a king. And as punishment for my hubris, an ailment snuffed out her life.”
At the end of his recollection, Ashborn’s lair returns to its original state. His mentor had also regained his shadowy exterior. The valley appears completely untouched by time, as if it were still one thousand years in the past. That’s why his lair looks like this. Jin-woo thinks as he finally recognizes its significance, It was their personal sanctuary. After a few moments of silence, Ashborn speaks.
“Although our circumstances are similar, you still have the privilege of choice. I cannot turn back time, nor can I change the past, but I am grateful. I experienced unspeakable grief, yes, but I also would have never encountered such love, tenderness, and passion had I not taken a chance on my omega. You, my disciple, still have free rein over your decision. Should you choose to pursue this woman, you have my blessing and irrefutable proof that she is a viable mate for you. If not, you will still receive my unwavering support in your future endeavors. The choice is yours to make.”
Jin-woo’s throat bobs. He feels an incredible sense of guilt at unearthing his master’s secret.
“My teacher, I apologize for prying into your past. I – I did not mean to bring up painful memories for you. I cannot imagine what you have endured. As of right now, I am not sure what it is I want, but I know for a fact I cannot give up on this human. I will need some time to contemplate and sort out my feelings. If you will excuse me.”
Jin-woo bows his head before turning to take his leave. As he approaches the exit, a sudden thought emerges at the forefront of his mind.
“Teacher, there is one more question I must ask. This human, she does not speak with words. She communicates with her hands and gestures. Is this some type of sorcery or spell that she’s casting?”
“It is most likely sign language, a manner of non-verbal communication used by humans who are unable to vocalize or hear. Perhaps she cannot speak, or has a hearing impairment, so she must express herself through other means.” Ashborn answers, curiosity lacing his voice.
Jin-woo feels his heart sinking. A siren’s serenade played a pivotal role in the mating ritual and was performed just prior to consummating an eternal bond. If what Ashborn said is true, then there is a possibility you could be immune to his song. This meant he wouldn't be able to use it on you when the time came…
He grits his teeth as he remembers your smiling face. Try as he might, Jin-woo just could not get you out of his head, nor was he willing to let you escape his grasp. You may not have realized it yet, but you had unknowingly sunk your fangs into him and the seeds of obsession were already beginning to take root. Rather than being discouraged by Ashborn’s observation, he instead finds himself reinvigorated.
“Teacher, disregard everything I said earlier. I now know what it is I must do.”
Ashborn peers into the eyes of his disciple, relieved by the determination that lights them. This was much more like the obstinate young man he knew.
“I choose to seek this omega and stake my claim, no matter what challenges may await the two of us,” Jin-woo proclaims proudly. “I will make her mine, but only if she consents to my proposal. And if not through song, then through other courtship methods. I am strong, stronger than any other alpha in my territory, and I know I can protect her from all who would wish her harm. I won’t let my mate slip through my fingers.”
“But what of maladies and the passage of time? You can fight against gods and monsters until the end of your days, but sickness or her ephemeral lifespan will not spare this young woman. In the end, your time with her shall be fleeting.” Ashborn ruthlessly counters Jin-woo’s declaration of protection.
Jin-woo bites his lip, not expecting this development. However, before he can muster a response, his mentor graces him with an answer.
“I know of one way you can overcome this. There is a recipe for an elixir known as the Holy Water of Life. It is a miraculous potion that can imbue invulnerability to communicable diseases, extend lifespan, and transform the consumer into a siren. I unfortunately did not have knowledge of such a panacea while I was with my love. Of course, I live with the regret of not discovering it sooner, as now I have no such use for it, but this does not mean I will idly stand by and let history repeat itself with my protégé.”
With a flash of light, an ancient scroll appears in front of Jin-woo. It unravels by itself to reveal its contents to him. Jin-woo’s eyes widen as he reads. Is this…?
“Behold. The ingredients for crafting the Holy Water of Life. I bequeath this boon unto you, my disciple. However, heed my warning as the acquisition of these components requires you to conquer all 100 floors of the Demon’s Castle and to defeat its king, Baran. This is a treacherous dungeon that may claim your life if you are unprepared for it, but it can also impart you with unspeakable power should you prevail.”
Jin-woo perks up at this information, his interest now fully piqued. “Tell me, master, where can I find the Demon’s Castle?”
“It hides far away, in the city of Seoul, within an incorporeal dominion. It is a flame-ridden landscape that will require you to assume the form of a human to enter the castle. Knowing all the risks it entails; do you still accept my offer?”
“I do,” Jinwoo confidently states.
“Very well,” Ashborn nods his assent, and a key materializes into Jin-woo’s palm.
“Use this key to open the gate to the Demon’s Castle. I have also implanted it with the coordinates to the dungeon’s location. You need only close your eyes and grasp onto the key to visualize it.”
Following the instructions, Jin-woo sees a map that details the exact distance from his current whereabouts to the metropolitan area of Seoul. It will be a lengthy trip, even with his impressive swimming prowess. He estimates it will take roughly half a day to arrive at his destination. Undeterred, Jin-woo presses onward.
“Teacher, I cannot thank you enough for all your help and guidance over these last few years. I give you my word; I will return alive and well, both with the elixir and Baran’s head. And then I will meet with the omega and court her in earnest.”
He departs without another word, although his promise relays an unspoken farewell between them. After some time passes, Ashborn stares at the vast skies of his domain and muses to himself.
“You have grown so much from when I rescued you from the Cartenon Temple all those years ago, Sung Jin-woo. I could not be prouder of you, my disciple. Till our next encounter.”

12 hours later...
Jin-woo finally emerges from the dark, briny waters that frame Seoul’s coastline.
After leaving Ashborn’s lair, he briefly returned home to pack and prepare for the journey ahead. Both Jin-ah and his mother were worried about his sudden departure, so he did the best he could to assuage their fears by giving them a sanitized version of the truth.
Jin-woo claimed Ashborn had provided him with a list of rare ingredients that were only available for purchase in the human markets at Seoul. He even promised to bring back a box of chocolates as a souvenir, something his mother and little sister had enjoyed during one of his return trips to the surface. He then traveled the full 413-kilometer distance from Jindo-gun to Seoul, stopping only for a few hours to rest and recuperate.
As he approaches land, he assumes the form of a naked human man and walks inland from the sea. However, Jin-woo comes to a halt when he becomes more aware of his current state of nudity. While it didn’t bother him, it would cause a lot of unnecessary trouble if any nosy beachgoers happened upon him and asked questions. It is also…pretty embarrassing to admit that he is…wobbly on these legs. Very much so.
He quickly summons his magical inventory and grabs a simple black t-shirt, boxers, fitted jeans, and athletic sneakers (‘Adidas’, the portly sales attendant had called them). As worthless as he found human decorum to be, Jin-woo needed to remain as inconspicuous as possible while he was in disguise. Once dressed, he strolled into the city. After 45 minutes, he found himself at the designated street junction on the map. Taking a deep breath, he brings forth the key, turns it, and unlocks the gate.
⚓︎ To be continued...

#solo leveling#ore dake level up na ken#sung jin woo x reader#solo leveling x reader#sung jinwoo x reader#sung jin-woo x reader#sung jinwoo x you#sung jin woo x you#sung jinwoo x y/n#sung jin woo x y/n#yandere x reader#siren x reader#monster x reader#sung jinwoo#sung jin-woo#sung jin woo#manhwa x reader#siren x you#ashborn#solo leveling fanfic#yandere siren#yandere x you#soft yandere#yandere fanfiction
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𐙚 ɴᴏᴡ ᴘʟᴀʏɪɴɢ ... ╰┈➤ 𝚋𝚘𝚋 𝚛𝚎𝚢𝚗𝚘𝚕𝚍𝚜 𝚗𝚜𝚏𝚠 𝚊𝚕𝚙𝚑𝚊𝚋𝚎𝚝 ᶻ 𝗓 𐰁 .ᐟ


♫ ᴘʟᴀʏɪɴɢ: E.T by katy perry (3:26) // 𝄞⨾ ࣪𓍢ִ໋ " you're from a whole 'nother world, a different dimension.. " 𖤐.ᐟ
A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex) literally always taking care of you if sentry or void comes out during sex he's ensuring that none of them hurt you or degraded you in a harmful way, will be at your beck and call for hours on end.
B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s) his torso, he likes the way you ogle at him when his shirt peaks up a little bit - and how surprised you were when you realised that he was fully ripped, and how you like to drag your hands over his abs when he's on top of you.
he likes your hands a lot, he's completely addicted to your touch and obsessed by the way you feel him - he likes your hands in his mouth, wrapped around his cock or pushing at his shoulders when you get overstimulated.
C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically) bob is just HELLA messy with cum, the man has a spit kink you cannot tell me that he doesn't adore messy sex and smearing his cum on your stomach, face tits, inner thighs or just fully eating it out of you afterwards and lapping it up like. A. DOG.
D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs) he kind of gets off on the fact that other people can hear the two of you, therefore him being kind of loud during sex. people commonly infantilise him and say that he's not capable of certain things, so showing that he can fuck gives him an ego booster - even if that means walker staring at him awkwardly for the entire week like he didn't hear bob deriving unholy sounds from you from the other side of the tower.
E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?) i feel like bob is very limited with his experiences and hasn't really had the time to really learn about himself or the needs of his partner, (i talk about this in i) but pre-serum bob used to turn to hookups a shit ton but never did do much outside p in v and stuff.
F = Favorite position (this goes without saying) sentry's favourite position is missionary, being able to push your legs to your chest and fuck is cock so deep into you makes him so goddamn happy.
the void's favourite position is you on your knees in doggy style, or if he places you across the bed, your head draped over the edge of it so he can use your throat as his own personal fucktoy, but let's be for real he's pathetic as fuck.
but bob, ever so simple bob loves for you to ride him or missionary, he loves seeing your pretty little face and understand that he is what's making you feel good and likes the power control when you're on top of him.
G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.) he likes it to be funny sometimes if it's really intimate and non-judgemental, but usually he'll think that he's doing something wrong and gets caught up in his own head.
H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.) bob doesn't care about hair in the fucking slightest, he'll clean himself up every so often - but to be honest i dont think he gives a shit about hair on you either.
I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect) he values romance and intimacy so much because it takes a lot for him to fully trust someone in a way like this, because i full heartedly believe that when bob was addicted/pre-serum he just stuck to hookups and didn't want to burden someone with all of his issues and trauma by getting into a relationship but wanted the high and pleasure that came with sex. (i need to hug and kiss him better)
J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon) he believes that his hands not enough to suffice sometimes, but he'll resort to jerking off when it becomes desperate times - he likes it messy but still placed his shirt in his teeth so he doesnt drool everywhere or get cum on his shirt.
K = Kink (one or more of their kinks) spit kink!! we all saw that man literally drooling when he was about to sneeze, and you cannot tell me he practically drools during sex or when you go down on him - or when he's going down on you it's messy and wet and we love that.
L = Location (favorite places to do the do) in your bedroom or shower is his favourite place, but when no one else is around he'll settle for the couch in the living room or the kitchen counter.
M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going) he loves you and can get pretty turned on with you around but specifically when you're complimenting him or touching him - even if its a light brush against his arm that you don't notice, he sure does.
N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs) hurt you, like at all - he hates the idea of injuring you during sex when it's supposed to be romantic and intimate and also with all of his past he really is deterred from that idea and is constantly checking with you that you're okay/feel good.
O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.) GIVING 100%, he does like it when you go down on him but cmon! he's a drooling mess when he goes down on him, sure its messy and sloppy because he's inexperienced but it adds to it .
P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.) sentry is fast and praising (but in a mocking way) bob is slow and sensual (because ofc he is) void is fast, rough and degrading
Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.) i think bob mainly does quickies as sentry because sentry's a busy guy and doesn't have time to dwell on you, he has bigger things to do outside of you - bob takes it slow and sensual like i said before!
R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.) very limited exhibitionism, he'll fuck you in the watchtower's open spaces as long as no one is there, he's open to atleast trying something in the bedroom with you a atleast once because he likes to experiment with you.
S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?) with that sentry serum... he can go on forever (typically more so if sentry is the one who's in charge) but i feel like bob is just majorly touch starved all the time and can cum pretty easily.
T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?) a strap on guys idk who said that.. ya'll dabble in pegging, i feel it - it just fucks the angst out of bob. i feel like he's rlly open to toys in the bedroom then gets a little insecure about how much pleasure its giving you and replaces the silicone.
U = Unfair (how much they like to tease) sentry and void like to mock and tease when they're balls deep inside of you or have their fingers shoved into your pussy, but bob doesn't really do that all that often - he still does give the occasional one liner but thats just accidental sometimes, soft dom bob does some teasing im sure of it, but he's mainly trying to commit the experience to his mind so whatever he says, he says.
V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.) like i said in D (dirty secret) this man loves to be loud and makes sure that people can hear the two of you, mainly moans and whimpers from him along with a shit ton of praises and pleas.
W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character) uhhh i've kind of said a lot of wack shit for this entire alphabet, but mainly the entire pegging thing i covered in T.
X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes) tell me why i think it increased because of the sentry serum, he was already pretty big pre-serum, but i think it mainly just got girthier and increased like an inch or a half maybe !!!
Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?) BOB. YEARNS. he's a touch starved intimate man, like if you're looking so pretty during a morning meeting he's just staring at you like a lost puppy the entire time and is actively trying to ignore the growing bulge in his pants, this tied with the super serum and this man's sex drive is high.
Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards) i feel like bob doesn't sleep well in general, but with people - specifically with you, he sleeps way better. but he always makes sure you are asleep before him, even if that means staying up for a couple more hours.
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