#so i have to experience it vicariously through memes

[compacflt]

f-15 user manual got leaked on the war thunder forums and i immediately thought of you. by the way, i've thought about your fic every single day since i've read it.

I KNOW THERE’VE BEEN LIKE 5 WAR THUNDER INCIDENTS THIS WEEK LOL!! & someone posted that they had to be a character witness for their friend who was trying to get a job with Raytheon and one of the questions literally was “does your friend play war thunder?” bc of the history of classified leaks lmfao. Like gaijin is a natsec threat. it also happened to the f-16 (because apparently the war thunder f-16 flies like a brick compared to the real f-16, so the real f-16 specs got leaked to prove it) and…… and…… the RUSSIAN SU-57. aka their super classified supposedly fifth-gen fighters that we now know to be pieces of shit because of leaks like this one. knowing what we know now: of COURSE maverick fucked up 2 su-57s in a 40 year old f-14.

thank you for thinking of me!!! It means so much <3

[f1byjessie]

HE LIKES MY AMERICAN SMILE ━━ OP81.

love is a wild ride, and logan sargeant's sister is about to find this out the hard way.

( oscar piastri x sargeant!reader )

━━ part two.

INSTAGRAM.

liked by logansargeant, williamsracing, and 17,349 others

tagged: logansargeant

yourusername from a little boy meeting his heroes to a young man racing alongside them, getting to see all you’ve accomplished throughout the years makes me the proudest sister in the world. 2024 better watch its back, because sargeants always come back swinging.

view all 2,863 comments

logansargeant we pack a mean punch too 👊

↳ yourusername the meanest 👊

user wait no cuz this is actually so cute omg??? i want a sister to make cute posts about me

user definitely can’t wait to see more y/n at the races in 2024

williamsracing It was lovely having you in the paddock this season Y/N! We’re already looking forward to seeing what 2024 has in store!

↳ yourusername it was a genuine honor to be there! plus i look great in blue 😉💙

↳ user wait does this mean logan is re-signing??

alex_albon me and lily would love to have you both come round during the break if schedules align! 

↳ yourusername awwww alex!! speaking on behalf of logan, we’d love to!!

user i’m living vicariously through the sibling bond that the sargeant twins have

INSTAGRAM.

liked by oscarpiastri, landonorris, and 426,972

tagged: oscarpiastri

mclaren Some of our favourite meme-worthy images of Oscar from 2023! Which is your fav?

view all 2,632 comments

oscarpiastri guys…

user mclaren admin knows what the people want

↳ user mclaren admin feeding us well on this fine day

user these are actually so funny omg mans ain’t got no face filter

landonorris yea so this won’t be necessary for me pls and thx

↳ mclaren We already have the pictures ready! 👍

user i’ve made all of these faces at my tv this year

yourusername oh to be a rubber ducky in oscar piastri’s ice bath

↳ user OH? MY?? GOD???

↳ user UMMMM

↳ user real

INSTAGRAM.

liked by yourusername, oscarpiastri, and 835,781 others

tagged: oscarpiastri

landonorris papaya pals! looking forward to another season with you mate

view all 6,264 comments

user going into cardiac arrest

user damn oscar looking caked up

↳ user i’m glad i wasn’t the only one thinking it

oscarpiastri of all the pictures

↳ landonorris i giveth thy people what they want

↳ yourusername and we thank you for it sir lando 🫡

user MANIFESTING MORE PODIUMS FOR 2024

mclaren Looking forward to another year, boys! 🧡

danielricciardo you’re only posting these to show off your ass

↳ landonorris and if i am?

INSTAGRAM.

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yourusername i can still recall our last summer 

view all 926 comments

logansargeant it’s december 1st???

↳ yourusername it’s summer somewhere

user i wish i lived in florida

user MAMMA MIA REFERENCE

oscarpiastri ☀️

↳ yourusername 🌊

user i’m so delulu about what this could mean

↳ user it’s probably just an aesthetic caption?? y’all are fr crazy

↳ user no cuz it’s literally winter rn in the states so why would she post about summer?

↳ user bc she lives in florida?? where the weather is like summer all the time??

You lower your phone and look back to the dark waters crashing against the shore. Logan’s time in Formula 1 has meant you’ve been traveling around the world, getting to experience so much more than you’d ever imagined you would in your lifetime, but nothing compares to the familiarity and comfort of Florida— of home.

And your friends.

“So,” Sophia bumps her shoulder against yours, eyes alight with mischief when you turn to meet her expectant gaze. “Come on,” she teases, “tell me about him.”

You’ve been friends with her for a few years now, ever since moving back to the United States. She was born and partially raised in Belgium, so after spending so long in Europe, she’s the only one who understood the minor culture shock of moving back. You both clicked, and you’ve been stuck together ever since. You’ve learned, however, that if there’s one constant about her, it’s without a doubt her need to gossip about anything and everything— but specifically boys.

You huff out a laugh, “There’s no ‘he’ to tell you about.”

She hums into her glass of wine, eyeing you skeptically.

“There isn’t!” You laugh, shoving her lightly.

She gasps and feigns falling back onto the blanket spread out beneath you. She’s dramatic, too, and that’s another reason you matched so well. She feels like the sister you never had, which makes moments like this feel even more special.

“This back and forth with a certain OP-eighty-one suggests otherwise,” she sing-songs back at you as she sits up, making kissing faces and cackling when you shove at her again.

“I’m not sure how you even know about that,” you grumble. “You don’t even use Instagram.”

“Maybe not, babes,” she casts her gaze out across the ocean, “but I have my sources. So come on, between us girls and us girls only, tell me what’s going on.”

You heave a sigh, gulp down the last mouthful of wine in your glass, and then pour yourself another while she waits. You’re not getting out of this, and part of you does really want to talk about things. On top of being your brother and therefore way more protective than he needs to be, Logan is also Oscar’s best friend and you’re not sure what “bro code” is exactly, but you imagine not dating your friend’s sister is part of it— so he’s out of the question. You’d go to Dalton if you were sure he wouldn’t tell Logan, but they’re loyal to each other and have some sort of unspoken pact when it comes to your love life. You joked once that instead of your dad, it’d be them waiting at the door with a shotgun if you ever brought a guy home, but you’re not sure it was a joke at all with how they act sometimes.

“It started in Bahrain,” you begin, rolling your eyes when she wiggles excitedly and turns her undivided attention to you. “I’ve known him for a while because he and Logan have driven together since they were young, so I messaged him after the race to say that it sucked he had to retire so early into it.”

“And?”

You shoot her a look. “And, we kept talking. One thing led to another and we met up for drinks…” You fiddle with the rim of your glass, glancing back out to the water. You can’t tell if the heat on your face is because you’re embarrassed, or from spending so much of your day under the Floridian sun. “That’s it.”

“That’s it?” She asks incredulously.

“Well—” you purse your lips. “We kissed. Once. When he dropped me off at the hotel. But it was probably just the alcohol or something. I don’t think he wanted it to mean anything. I bet he just wanted to have fun but couldn’t because he had to leave early in the morning.”

She sends you a look. “He was sober enough to drive you back… but you think it was alcohol influencing his decisions? And he kissed you, even knowing he wouldn’t be able to ‘have fun?’ Right. Didn’t mean anything at all.”

You shake your head and huff. “He was upset because he’d had such high hopes for his first Grand Prix and it ended poorly, and I was there to comfort him, so maybe that’s why. He got caught up in the moment, or something.”

“Y/N, I love you. I do. You’re my best friend and you’re like a little sister to me,” she cups your face in her hands and turns you to look at her. “But you can be so dense sometimes, do you know that?”

“Then why hasn’t he brought it up?” You ask, your voice garbled slightly from the way her hands squish your cheeks together. “We saw each other again in Melbourne, to celebrate him getting his first points, and he didn’t say anything then. Or Miami, or England, or Japan.”

She gives you another look and lets your face go. “It’s a two-way street, babe. Why haven’t you brought it up?”

And… that’s a good point. You technically could’ve brought it up, too. You’d just been so afraid of how he would’ve reacted that you’d chosen to keep quiet, preferring uncertainty over rejection. It’s the same reason why you so rarely pursue the things you want. A fear of rejection stands in your way, and you realize suddenly that you could’ve ruined things with someone you genuinely like just because you were afraid.

“You know, like, Schrodinger’s cat," you start meekly. "If you don’t open the box, the cat is dead and alive, because you don’t know. So I never brought it up. Because not knowing is better than him telling me it was nothing.”

She reaches out and wraps her arm around your shoulders, pulling you into her side. When she speaks again, her voice is calmer, less accusatory, a murmur against the ambiance of the hissing tide— “But what if he tells you it’s something?”

You groan. “He probably thinks I’m not interested.”

“Y/N—”

“Oh God!” You pull away and bury your face into your hands. “I ruined it all!”

She pries your hands away and looks you in the eye. There’s a sparkle in her gaze, it’s the look she gets when she has a plan.

“You haven’t ruined it. We just have some work to do.”

━━ tags: @f1-is-lovely-33 @chasing-liberosis

━━ a/n: i am overwhelmed by the amount of love on the first part of this! genuinely did not anticipate it at all, and i'm so thankful. so here's the second part! i hope it does justice to the first!

[dinoclawsz]

B4 I continue posting art of them I think I need to explain my whole thought process……so here’s some (not all) reasons why I think Pagan and Antón should and would kiss sloppy style 😊

-They share a lot of similarities! Most obvious being their jobs as ermm terrible dictators but more importantly their shared ‘guerilla forces ripping apart the country’ situations 🐡I think they would meet first in a purely diplomatic fashion ofc, to trade weapons and/or money in order to deal with their own respective resistances. This would also mean they have tons of preexisting respect and even understanding for each other, and also bonding over a mutual burning hatred of anarchists is a funny way to get close to somebody lawl. Also I know it would b out of character for Pagan to quit his hermetic lifestyle out of the blue to go visit some guy in the Caribbean but idrc I’m just trying to have fun :)

-Another similarity they have is their relationship to fatherhood and problems regarding it. While Antón never really wanted to be a father or have Diego and wouldn’t have if not for his cancer, Pagan DID want to be a father, but lost the only real chance he’d ever have at it, so I think upon meeting Diego he’d exploit it as a chance to be the father he never got the opportunity to be. I think they’d look to each other for advice; Pagan on how to be a good mentor for Ajay, and Antón on how to be a better and kinder person to Diego. Also I find the concept of Pagan being an estranged mom-type figure to Diego (without him fully understanding the extent of his relationship to his papá) very fun

-They have contrasting personalities :3 Pagan has a very charismatic, energetic, fun and self-absorbed personality while Antón is more cool, collected and down-to-earth and I think they’d get along nice and compliment each other well……opposites attract and what not and I think they would have an interesting dynamic

-I also think their age difference would play a part in them liking each other; Pagan trying to keep him up-to-date w current shit, explaining to him what Twitter is, showing him memes or whatever, while Antón would get to live vicariously through Pagan

-Theyd b into each other technically speaking….Antón has a lot of class and poise and we know that’s important to Pagan..also his type quite obviously includes men (and besides who wouldn’t be into giancarlo esposito), but regarding Antón, a lot of the properties found in the only person we know hes canonically been involved with romantically (Maria Marquessa) are also found in Pagan; charisma/big personality, work in publicity and media, their slightly manipulative tendencies, even down to their similar appearance. Ik this is like likening a filet mignon (Pagan) to Spam (Maria) but it’s for my point okay

-Speaking of Maria, one of the primary reasons her and Antón fell apart (according to the fc6 audiobook (listen to it pls and ty)) was differences regarding his ambitions and drive to become President. With Pagan these misunderstandings would be nonexistent as, once again, they have similair life experiences and an understanding of what it takes to do what they do

-I think they wld take good care of each other 👍Antón def needs someone to look after him as his cancer is slowly killing him which I think Pagan would do gladly. Besides the whole murdering people thing he’s a v caring person towards the ppl he loves. Pagan also needs someone to bring him out of his shell and show him he can love again which I think Antón could do. Once again in the fc6 audiobook Diego mentions that Antón gets uncharacteristically warm around the people he loves so imo it’s not too far fetched

-Final definitive reason: I like old evil man yaoi 👍and they should kill ppl together thats hot..thanks for reading like and subscribe 4 more

[celestialmantdonna]

Welcome! I'm Mint (26, any pronouns) and here I write Mantis, mostly MCU-based but with some comic + game influences. Indie, semi-selective, mutuals only, 20+ muns only. I do not own Mantis, the Guardians of the Galaxy or any Marvel characters; they all belong to their respective creators, this is fan content. If we are mutuals don't be afraid to reach out to me to plot, suggest new verses, send me potential scenarios for our muses, etc. This blog is for fun so please be nice!

I default to using a normal sized font for accessibility, but if you want me to use a small font/you use it yourself because it's not a problem for you, I will!

Rules and guidelines are below the cut. Thank you in advance for reading them! (But no really, read them before interacting pls.)

Relevant links: muse | bio | verses | memes

1. This blog will have SPOILERS! If you want to watch the GotG movies without knowing any spoilers, you might wanna avoid this blog.

2. I do not write with muns under the age of 18, or ideally 20. If I can't find your age somewhere on your blog, I will assume you're under 20 and I will not write with you. I'm sure you write really well but it's just a me thing!

3. Do not reblog my OOC posts/threads you are not involved in. Do not reblog my open starters if we are not mutuals. If you enjoy my writing, I appreciate that! But please, if you're a personal blog, don't reblog anything that is not a gifset/image/fanart. I get that not everyone reads the rules, and sometimes it's an honest mistake. But if you do so deliberately, I will block you. Sorry.

4. I am multi-verse and multi-ship. OC & crossover friendly. I am semi-selective. Mutuals only except for asks.

5. No godmodding. This one's pretty simple. Despite Mantis having the power to control others, she will only use her powers on your muse if your muse agrees or if you and I have discussed it and you are okay with it. Similarly, if your muse can also control others, let's discuss it! Let's see what they can do to Mantis! It's fun to explore their powers, but no actual godmodding.

6. Shipping is fun and we can discuss it but please: no forcing ships and no saying our characters are dating/married without telling me. On a similar note, no saying our characters have a child without discussing it prior. I consider it a form of godmodding, and chances are I'll stop writing with you. Unless I reblog memes about sending in hypothetical kids, don't do that. I'm not saying you cannot do that with your other rp partners if they're okay with that, but don't do so with me.

7. I am me and Mantis is Mantis. Please separate the two, because I separate the muns from their muses. I want to write and create with you, not help you fulfill some sort of fantasy. I understand we can all use our own emotions and life experiences to put ourselves in a specific headspace to write, but if you're living vicariously through your muse, I'm not the partner for you. Nothing against that, I have a friend who writes self-insert, reader-insert stories and one-shots and my friend is an amazing writer. Don't be discouraged, you'll find the right partner!

8. I don't care whether you use icons or not or whether you occasionally commit typos. I do ask you try to use punctuation at least a little because if not, I will read entire sentences without any sort of pause, with no inflection or sense of pacing whatsoever. I really value creativity and characterization and I myself will, probably, have a typo every once in a while, it's all good, just try to keep a bare minimum of grammar.

9. I will never pressure you to reply to threads so please don't pressure me. If I think you actually forgot to reply I might gently remind you and you can do the same with me. This is supposed to be a fun hobby, let's remember that, yeah? I can be forgetful at times. If we're writing together please don't assume I do this because I don't want to write with you. If I'm writing with you it's because I want to and you do as well.

10. No OOC drama. Please. I am here to write and have a good time. In order to interact with me, be constructive when OOC, not destructive. I know we're all human, I understand we all have bad days, it's all good, but don't be a dick. Be respectful, to me and to anyone else I may be writing with. Don't police who I can or cannot write with, because I won't do that to you. I don't want OOC drama. Give me all the drama between muses though!

Some additional info:

Duplicates are welcome.

You can send Anonymous asks, they are welcome and appreciated. They can help me develop headcanons, ideas, etc.

If we're not mutuals and I answer one of your asks, though, don't expect it to become its own thread. I want to believe no one is being direspectful on purpose when it comes to this, but I wouldn't want you to take the time to write that, since I probably won't reply. Never anything personal, I wish I had time to write with everyone, but you know, real life and all that.

I don't write sexually charged material, it's just a preference of mine since I use writing as a tool of storytelling. If I tell you a story, personally I'm not gonna describe every little thrust/moan/gasp. Though if our muses have chemistry and I'm comfortable with you as a mun I'll absolutely be open to writing something a little spicy, but mostly fade to black/pillow talk/morning after stuff. It will be tagged ns;fw. Unprompted smutty starters/asks will get you blocked. If you write that with your other rp partners I don't mind though so don't worry about that.

If we're already writing together and you want to try a different dynamic, just reach out! While I do like to build relationships (of any kind) between muses, we can absolutely have more than one verse.

If you've read this far without yawning drop a 🪐 in the ask box (Anonymously or not) and I'll write a little playlist for you with songs I think the Guardians would have on their Zune.

[benevolentgodloki]

Be honest meme: 4, 14, 15, 34

Be Honest Meme

4. How do you explain rp to someone in the real world?

// Most of the time I don't, but when I do, I guess I describe it as 'I write stories with other people where we play our favourite characters and indulge in telling tales back and forth as a game and seeing what happens if X and Y were in a certain situation'. If I really trust someone, it can go straight to 'lol I play dolls and make Loki the tumblr bicycle'.

14. Do you think rp has had a positive or negative affect on your life or you as a person?

// I'd say largely positive. It's how I met my best friends and has sparked so much of my creativity. My writing's apparently helped people in the past, though on another blog on a nicer character than Loki XD It's helped me cope through tough times and I've learnt things vicariously about life. There are also of course negative things where I've made mistakes and had to learn from them, I let role-play eat my time quite a lot (or I used to at least) and some experiences left me with some major instances of stress, but it's all about finding the balance and doing what's right for you. In the end, it's not much different from anyone else's hobbies and the social circumstances surrounding those. It's been both helpful and detrimental to my marriage at times lmao. But, yeah, I'd say positive. I can explore the lives I can't or wouldn't really want to live but find exciting to write. We fulfil each other as best we can as writers.

15. How has rp changed you personally?

// Oof, that's deep. I'm not sure if I'm even the right person to answer that. It's toughened me up a bit I guess and also freed me in other ways. Becoming someone else really helps escape from difficult times in life or provides a boost when things are going pretty good. It's helped me work out my boundaries and, as above, given me experiences to learn from regarding behaviour of my own and those around me. We can't be perfect but rp definitely has an effect on the shape of a person if they're involved in it often enough. I sometimes end up taking on a bit of the emotions of the muses I write, which isn't always a good thing with Loki. I don't mean I start lying and manipulating more, but I do get crankier and less patient at times lol! These feel like negative things. The positive stuff all got mentioned already in the previous question XD

34. Have you ever cried while writing a reply?

// Yes lol. I think one or two of any threads I've tagged with #ow may have got me. Probably stuff involving @araedi's Thor and likely frostiron and strangefrost angst. If Loki's really suffering or muses are going through really terrible things, or they're heartbroken etc and it's around that time of month you bet I'm gonna be sobbing.

[side-shuffling-hyperfixations]

Hello ! I love your work and I was wondering if you could write something about Peter 1 and 3 finding out about the fact that Peter 2 was low-key possessed at some point ? I'm referring to spider-man 3 with venom, if we ignore the memes and take into consideration the fact that this situation must have been traumatizing for him. I wonder how the other peters would react and how p-2 could talk about what happened to him

He wears all black just like his soul, yet his heart is made of gold.

__________

“So yeah, that’s how Mr. Stark saved the universe. Killed the big purple guy and his whole creepy alien dog army in a snap of his fingers. Done and—well, yeah, literally done and dusted,” Peter One concluded his long tale with a decisive nod and a shrug. He wasn’t ready to talk about what had happened immediately after that, not in too much detail, and his brothers seemed to sense the tenderness of his grief on the subject. They wouldn’t press him for anything more.

“That’s…wow.” Peter Three shook his head. “He must have been one hell of a guy.”

“Heh. Yeah, h-he was, he was amazing.” After a lingering moment of silence, Peter One fidgeted, shrugging again in an attempt to move the conversation forward. “But hey, now that you know about Thanos and that whole deal, I want to hear more about Peter Two’s alien! What was that like?”

“Oh, yeah!” Nudging their older brother in the side, Peter Three concurred, prompting, “How’s about that space goo, huh? Was it a big alien invasion force like the purple guy’s?”

“Uh…no, it was just the one.” Peter Two allowed himself a small, uncomfortable chuckle. “Not quite as impressive as saving the whole universe. I don’t know if you’d really be that interested in hearing the whole thing.”

“Hey, no, I bet your showdown was really epic too!” Two made an inconclusive noise, stalling for a few more seconds by taking a sip of his beer, only to swallow hard and stifle a cough when Three promptly elbowed him again, wheedling, “Come on, I don’t even have any cool alien stories! I’ve gotta live vicariously through you two. Spill the tea!”

Peter Two’s lips thinned in a rueful, lopsided smile that didn’t quite reach his eyes. “Well…” He cleared his throat. “It came down to Earth in a meteorite that hit Central Park. MJ and I were out there on a date and it must have followed me home somehow. Maybe it hitched a ride on my bike or something, I don’t know. Anyway, I went to bed in the suit because I was waiting to lure a specific criminal out of hiding—it was Flint Marko, actually. You remember him.”

“Obviously.”

“Yeah, kinda hard to forget the big, angry sand giant when I’m still finding grains of him stuck in my boots!”

Peter Two chuckled again, this one even more halfhearted than the last. “I feel you there—and, um, speaking of things getting stuck to the suits, that’s exactly what happened. One second I was in bed like normal, then I thought I felt something crawling on me, like…like worms or snakes. It was all just really cold and slimy.”

Peter Three sputtered, flailing his hands against the mental image the same time Peter One cringed with an “Eww!”

“Yeah. Not the best sensory experience.” Instinctively sliding his arms over his chest, he suppressed a faint shudder at the memory. “For a second I thought I had become self-aware in the middle of a nightmare or maybe sleep paralysis. I couldn’t move, I-I couldn’t do anything to stop it. It was all over my face and neck, everything went black and then…well, I still have no memory of how I got there or why but when I woke up, I was on the side of a building somewhere with this alien goo fused to my body.”

“Wha—” The disgusted furrow of Peter Three’s brows deepened for a moment before he fully processed the words and they shot up toward his hairline. “Wait, what?”

Running his hands gingerly up and down his arms to quell a phantom prickling sensation, Peter Two kept his gaze averted to the floor but in his peripheral he could still see Peter One scrambling upright in his seat, concern paling his face.

“Dude, that’s—holy—”

“I-I was okay,” he hastily interjected, only to self-correct with a grimace. “At least I felt okay afterward. Actually it almost felt good.” The words tasted bitter; his stomach turned against them. “I don’t know. If it was supposed to hurt, maybe it’s a good thing I blacked out.”

“Wait, wait, hang on, that’s not the point!” Peter Three interrupted. “I mean, I’m glad it didn’t hurt you but it still…all you’ve ever said was that you fought a black goo alien, you never said it possessed you!”

“It assimilated my suit, it didn’t really possess…” He paused, heaving a short, steadying breath. “Alright, it…imprinted on me, bound itself to me. We had a sort of symbiotic link.”

“That doesn’t make it sound any better!” Peter One stammered, aghast. “It stole time from you, stole your memories? You still don’t remember what happened in that gap before you were on the building?”

“No but…honestly, when all is said and done, that little bit of missing time has been the easiest part to cope with. If I could forget everything that happened next…” He was sure the others could hear it when his heart skipped a beat. The old, familiar guilt and self-loathing were creeping up his back, tightening his throat. Peter Three’s hand on his knee, much gentler than his prior nudging, didn’t help.

“Peter Two, are you—are you actually okay from all that?”

Jerking a nod, he repressed the initial urge to maneuver away from his touch. “Yeah. I’ve dealt with it f-for the most part. It was years ago.”

“Okay, but you know that whole ‘time heals all wounds’ thing is bull.”

“True, but I’ve done a lot of work on myself since then. Most days I don’t even think about it. It’s just…obviously not something I like to think back on.” His downcast eyes darted over their worried faces only briefly before tearing away again. “I know you guys look up to me in a lot of ways. I-I’m honored by that but I have a feeling if you knew what I did back then, you wouldn’t be so quick to call me a hero.”

“Hey. That’s not fair to yourself, not when you can stand to be around me.” Peter Three’s fingers tightened on his knee for a moment. “I’ve done a lot of terrible things in my time and you haven’t hesitated even once to tell me that I’m loved.”

“Mr. Stark wasn’t all great his whole life either,” Peter One added in a small voice. “He made plenty of big mistakes. H-He used to be an arms dealer but then he spent the rest of his life trying to make up for it. He turned it around and became a real hero.”

“Like you. What matters to us is who you choose to be now. You’re our brother and we love you—and whatever it was that happened, I think the black goo could stand to take some of the credit for any poor decision making.”

“It was a lot more than ‘poor decision making,’” Peter Two spat, voice hitching. “The symbiote—it brought out the worst in me, everything dark and arrogant and spiteful and cruel. I was the hero of the city and all I wanted to do was hurt people. I ruined my life and the lives of everyone around me.” Finally twisting away from Three’s grasp, he rounded on Peter One. “C-Can you imagine ever throwing a bomb in your friend Ned’s face?”

“I’m sorry, what?!”

“Can you? I can, because I did. My best friend Harry, I threw a bomb at him. I tried to kill him! Marko too. You were better than I could be, Peter One. I didn’t want to save him, I didn’t want to cure him. I ground his face into dust and sent him down a drain without a second thought, like he was nothing. Good riddance. And MJ…” He bit the inside of his cheek against the memory of his hand stinging from the impact. Clenching his fingers now, he dug the heels of his palms viciously into his burning eyes. “I became everything I hated. I was a bully and a monster and—and—”

“And it wasn’t the real you, Peter! You had an alien parasite attached to you, affecting your mind,” Peter Three stressed. “You were under duress!”

“But I still did it. I used and abused people, manipulated them, tore them down at every turn and I thought it was fun.”

“But we know you, we know you aren’t really like that. A monster wouldn’t be looking back on it now and still regretting it,” Peter One protested. “If that’s who you actually were, d-do you really think Mary Jane still would have married you? I think MJs have a knack for seeing through Peters no matter which universe they’re in. She has to know who you really are, even better than we do.”

“Who are you?” she had demanded from the ground, staring up at him with grief, horror and accusation in her face.

“You’re a good man, no matter what the symbiote told you. I know our whole thing is great responsibility but there is such a thing as taking too much responsibility. That creature corrupted you. And maybe you felt okay in a twisted way when it was happening but looking at you now, your friend Harry and MJ and all of them obviously aren’t the only ones who got hurt.”

Curling his knees up underneath him on the couch, Peter Two stayed shamefacedly silent. Several seconds crawled tremulously by, during which Peter Three scooted to reclose the distance between them and slip an arm around his shoulders. Thankfully Two didn’t try to pull away a second time. When he spoke again, it was in one soft, shaky breath, barely audible.

“I really am okay most days. I swear I’m okay. I just still get nightmares sometimes.”

[aesthetic-bastard]

Media Interaction 2022

Part 2: February

Metal Gear Solid - I think after playing the first couple of games in the No More Heroes series there was definitely a pipeline of interests beginning to form that you definitely see when looking back on my media consumption of this year because the next interest to pick up after No More Heroes was Metal Gear Solid. I do feel like my interest in this series was very brief considering I only know so much about the characters and a lot of Metal Gear games are not available on any modern console so experiencing any of these games was vicariously through my friends streaming them for me to watch. I think the character from this series that definitely piqued my interest was Raiden

and oddly around the time I took up a strong adoration for this character was probably around the time Metal Gear Rising first became strongly popular with a rise in memes in internet culture. I would like to say my interest in this character was purely my own organic discovery. It was such an odd coincidence that after I began forming a strong attachment to Raiden I suddenly started seeing him everywhere. I noticed this personal phenomenon keeps happening a lot when I enjoy something before it blows up all over the internet. I'm hoping in the future I can emulate a few games out of this series to experience it for myself personally. the only game I have access to is Metal Gear Rising in my Steam library but I feel like MGR is very insincere compared to the mainline Metal Gear games so I'm putting it aside to play at some point. I also am hoping to get my hands on a copy of Snake Eater 3D for the 3DS even though it's wicked expensive since it was taken off the 3DS eShop this year so physical copies are now very rare.

[ravusnightblossom]

KNOWING YOUR PARTNER WELL CAN POTENTIALLY MAKE WRITING TOGETHER A LOT EASIER. ( REPOST DO NOT REBLOG ! )

Well, this seems like a good way to close out the new year. xo

○  name: Fox  

○  pronouns: She/Her (You can refer to me however you want, though.)

○    preference of communication: It depends, honestly... With some people I prefer Discord, with some it’s other ways. I’m kinda’ introverted communicating with anyone I’m not fairly close to.

○    name of muse(s): Oh man... Let’s see, there’s Ravus Nox Fleuret (this blog,) Lunafreya Nox Fleuret - @lunaedivine, Tate Langdon - @preparing-for-the-noble-war, Ardyn - @an-mallaithe , Margaery Tyrell - @thorned-soul , Chrissy Cunningham - @thechrissycunningham ; and my multi with a whole slew of others - @down-the-fox-den .  My less actives are my OC, Amira Trae - @kindlingthedawn , Dorian Pavus - @fior-dha-fein​ and a couple side blogs. 

○    platforms you’ve used: Uuuuh... Tumbles, Livejournal, Discord, Myspace, ICQ, etc... I’m old.

○    best experience: I found my best friend through Ravus. Seriously, I couldn’t imagine my life without @dragcnlxrd​ in it. We’re two completely different types of people, but it works for us. Ironically, Lysander and Ravus are also polar opposites, but the balance makes it work. I think her and I are the same.  

○    rp pet peeves / dealbreakers: Drama, plain and simple. (I’m leaving Kay’s answer here.)

○    fluff, angst, or smut: I do love some good fluff. There’s so much shit in the world that sometimes it’s comforting to vicariously feel that content. That said, angst is also FUN sometimes. It’s enticing to explore every side of a character. As for smut, I do enjoy writing it from time to time, but it has to be chemistry-based and fall into plot. I don’t really enjoy writing lewd content just to do it. Maybe that’s my asexual arse showing. 

○    plots or memes:  Plots, if I have to choose. I like memes, but just as one-offs to explore interactions. 

○    best time to write: Hmm. Late. Or early, you could say. I’m a night owls, so midnight to 4am ish. I can generally only write when interruptions are at a minimum; no outside noises, no phones ringing, etc. 

○    are you like your muse(s): Well, let’s face it, most anyone who has devoted themselves to a character for an exceptionally long time ends up incorporating a few of their own traits and quirks into their muse. Of course we try to write out their quirks and behaviours, but sometimes it’s nice to add in something we can relate to.  For example, Ravus shares my dislike of sweets, unless it involves fresh fruits (especially strawberries,) something I actually didn’t know was canon until later years. We also both love cats, which interestingly seems to be a fanon takeaway on him.  Ardyn... We both loathe society and social constructs, plus we have many theological beliefs. Lunafreya... We’re both empathetic pushovers with intrigue in holistic well-being. I haven’t really hashed out many other similarities with my other muses, yet. Or, if I did, it would be more an essay than a questionnaire meme. 

tagged by: @therebekahmikaelson​ (Thank you my dear! ♥)

tagging: If you’re reading this, consider yourself tagged if you want to do it! ALL OF YOU.

[gracefulweather]

Happy 2-year friend-versary to my fave, Sherrie! 🩷🩵💙💜 Even though our messages have evolved from live chats everyday to paragraph messages every few days, I’m always grateful to have you as my bestie from 10,000 miles away! I can confirm that the Canadian trip from 2022 is still very much my personality! 😂😂😂 And I still get oddly excited when I see things related to Canada (or more specifically, Toronto and Montreal) because they all just remind me of you!

It’s been so great to see you grow in the last year as well! It makes me so happy to see you do well and be living life well (those holidays and concerts!). 🥺🥺🥺 Wishing you always the best of luck in everything that you do!

Although you barely hear me complain about That Project ™️ anymore, you have now graduated to hearing me complain about That Flaky Project Manager ™️ so thank you for always putting up with my work stories! 🤣 I hope my work stories continue to be a source of entertainment to you and perhaps they’ll also be writing inspo for you! 🫠🫠🫠 I will also always think it’s funny that now you know so much about me that you even know the people around me despite having never met them yet! (And to be perfectly honest, some of my in real life friends also know you as The Canadian Friend ™️! 😂😂😂)

Every year, I’ll wish that we’ll meet up again in real life soon and this year is no different! 💖💖💖

Also even though we have less time (?) to be as delulu as before (?????), I have still found screenshots to summarise our 2nd year of friendship! 🥺🥺🥺

HAPPY 2ND FRIENDVERSARYYYY NATTTT!!!! 🥰💖💞💝❣️💓 i know i'm SO late to answer this (sorry!!) buuut guess that also reflects the way our lives have changed since we first started talking 🥹 i miss our 8 hour daily chats, being endlessly delulu together, and ofc making up the funniest scenarios to fuel that delusion (did you know???? that mingyu was gonna visit the cn tower on the same day as us??? and then fall in love ofc!!)

it's been great to see you grow over the years too and i'm definitely honoured to be your character development friend!! i love hearing your work stories from analyzing all of That Manager's behaviours to gossiping about how Flaky Manager might've met his gf, and everything in between! it's also been great to live vicariously through your concert reviews and fun moments with besties, so even though we're at the opposite ends of the world, it's so comforting to know that i have such a close bestie <3

and ofc your canada trip can still be your personality!! meeting up was such a once in a lifetime thing that i'll never thought get over it either bc who knew it'd happen? and even after it did, it still feels surreal??? (just like the entire face the sun album and be the sun tour did? yeah that). truly the stars aligned for that and i'll forever be grateful to have such an amazing experience!!

now just waiting for the day i get to do my dream trip to australia and visit you!!! 🤞 and of course let me dig through my screenshots folder for some material that we can laugh about again!! they're different from last year's although my humour is still very much the same bc i did initially pick out some screenshots that i realize i already sent last year then had to change them up HAHA. it's ok i have a massive folder so here are some more but unfortunately they're all old!! which means we definitely need another live texting delulu session sometime soooon <3

throwback to your ex-fav meme 🥰 HAHAH

[threewaysdivided]

For the ask game, 💘?

(Fanfic Writer Ask Game)

💘 Is it easier to write angst or fluff?

For me, definitely angst.

Part of it is certainly catharsis (fiction is a good vicarious release-valve when I’m feeling down) but it’s also that angst-adjacent emotions are something I feel like I can tease out more quickly and efficiently.  Especially when it comes to feelings of loss or sadness – I feel like you don’t necessarily need a lot of words to set up or communicate something poignant or impactful about pain/ grief.  It’s been memed to all heck at this point but there is a reason why For sale: baby shoes, never worn became such an enduring piece of flash-fiction.  There’s also the opportunity to have the reader do some of the work alongside you - to create a negative space or series of implications that an audience can read further into.  Of course, it’s not just that it takes less time to establish tone.  I like chasing softer, more specific emotions with my writing, and those are better served by doing a lot of atmosphere-building (e.g. DW Chapter 15 was me playing with homesickness).  And then there are other emotions – like fury, anxiety, indignation, dread etc. – that really need that kind of descriptive showing more than telling in order to place you into the scene and get you into the headspace of the characters.

A thing that makes fluff tricker for me is that it’s almost all in that atmosphere space.  I can’t just say that a moment is silly or light-hearted, that an interaction is tender or that a setting is cozy, and expect to have it land – that feeling needs to be part of the reading experience.  I have to actually build tone and description/ambience over the course of the whole scene to evoke and reinforce those emotions… and then there’s the balancing act of making a scene genuine and sincere without making it feel cheesy, sappy or vapid.  And that line is really subjective from person to person, so it’s a balance I’m less confident about striking well.

It also has to do with narrative utility.  Oh boy, here she goes again…  I’m a big fan of gen-fic and take a lot of inspiration from intrigue, mystery, crime-drama and fantasy, which means I like stories to have a bit of underlying momentum and direction.  Because of that, I’m more interested in whether a scene contributes something to the story or the pacing/tone than whether it technically classes as “angst” or “fluff”.  There are probably a lot of fluff scenes in fic that don’t register to me as fluff because they serve the narrative (I would actually be really interested to know which scenes in Deathly Weapons feel particularly fluffy or angsty to other people, since I’m pretty sure my definitions are really atypical) and I usually only consciously notice fluff (or gratuitous angst) if it feels like it’s hurting the pacing by stalling out story-momentum.  Since I like my scenes to feel purposeful, my writing and editing biases toward moments where characters introspect or are dealing with an internal/ external conflict – and since those scenes often involve some kind of conflict or reflection they also often skew more melancholy.  A fluffy scene can be made bittersweet through framing, but it’s a lot harder to “fluff up” an angst scene without creating weird dissonances.

Having little one-liners or gentle back-and-forwards inside other scenes is one thing but a thing I really like doing is pinning a character or moment down in a few lines, and for me that’s an easier trick to pull off in weighty or sombre scenes than light ones. 

Thanks for playing!

[canmom]

Let’s read Umineko! - episode 3 - part 13

みんなさん、今晩は！

It’s been a long, long time since the last entry in this series...

...almost five years, to be precise. So what even is this? A little re-introduction is in order.

Umineko no Naku Koru Ni (うみねこのなく頃に) is a dōjin visual novel originally created by Ryukishi07 between 2007 and 2010 - the sequel to Higurashi no Naku Koru Ni. It’s seen multiple versions since then on different platforms with replaced art, and gradually built up an international following. How to describe it? Perhaps we could call it a blend of a mystery story, a metafictional fantasy, an epistemology lesson and a meditation on power and intergenerational trauma - as well as an absolute meme factory with its hammy dialogue and running catchphrases. It’s kind of great.

So, what about this series? Five years ago I began reading through the story and writing a running commentary where I tried to solve the mysteries, guess at what’s going on, make my own stupid jokes, give impressions and commentary, and occasionally go into wild tangents about philosophy of science.

It was great fun but I burned out and gradually lost track of where I had been.

Back then it seemed that many of you enjoyed this whole thing, and over the years people have occasionally asked me if I would continue it. The barrier to resuming was pretty huge: I ended up rereading the whole game up to the point I’d reached before.

But now..... I’ve done it!

Another 42,000 clicks and who knows how many hours, and I am once again up to speed on the state of Rokkenjima island, mid episode 3.

Now, I am not really the same person who was liveblogging Umineko back in 2017. I’ve changed a lot (probably so have you). This won’t be the liveblog I would have written back then.

But that doesn’t matter! I hope I can continue to entertain - those of you who already like Umineko and want to vicariously experience that first readthrough again, and equally people who are perhaps unlikely to ever read Umineko and want to get an idea of what the fuss is about! Because perhaps even more so than before, I think this whole thing’s great, and I’d love to share it with more of you, and finally discover where this whole mad train is going.

So if you’d like to join, please step through to...

Let’s read Umineko! - episode 3 - part 13

featuring...

a recap to bring you up to speed if you are just joining me now...

another attempt to solve the riddle of the gold, with a little more progress!

what happens when your alter assumes vast magical powers

plenty of splatter, candy flavoured

Beato showing her dere side

grand revelations about the ‘Golden Witch’

Battler did what??

...um, a little elegance, maybe?

[makeste]

BnHA Chapter 291: The Endeavor Pamphlet

Previously on BnHA: Dabi showed up atop Gigantomachia’s back and was all “you’ll never guess who I really am!” and the readers humored him and were all “who?” and he was all “TODOROKI TOUYA” and we were all “WOW └(・。・)┘ OH MY GOSH I WOULD NEVER HAVE GUESSED”, except for Shouto and Enji who were GENUINELY SHOCKED. Anyway so Touya was all “and guess what I’m doing right now!” and before anyone could even try, he was all, “STREAMING MY EMMY-NOMINATED MINISERIES ‘HELLO, I’M EVIL BUT ALSO TRAGIC AND SEXY, NOW LET ME TELL YOU ALL ABOUT MY DAD WHO SUCKS’’, THAT’S WHAT.” And everyone was all “oh my god” and Touya was all “ヽ(⌐■_■)ノ♪” for basically the rest of the chapter, and that’s pretty much it! Oh, wait, except for the part where he also doused himself in bleach in a fit of pure theatrics, which is actually pretty much the main takeaway from the entire chapter really because it was just wild af. ANYWAYS.

Today on BnHA: Horikoshi introduces Baby Touya, the world’s most enchantingly sweet character, and is immediately all, “I sure can’t wait to tell you guys all about how his fucking jaw burnt off.” Thankfully he doesn’t (YET), and we cut back to the present pretty quickly, where Dabi explains how he took all of his brain cells that should have been used to stop him from pouring bleach over his head, and instead put them all toward his big brain plot of releasing an elaborate video detailing Endeavor’s various abuses and crimes, and even throwing Hawks under the bus as well because WHY NOT. He then leaps off of Gigantomachia’s back (like I said, no brain cells) all set to blast them with a Prominence Burn, only to be stopped by none other than THE LEGEND HIMSELF, MOTHERFUCKING BEST, PRETTIEST, NICEST, MOST OUTSTANDING MOTHERFUCKING JEANIST. Who’s no doubt outraged by the crime against hair he witnessed only moments earlier. GO GETTIM JEANY BOI.

so I haven’t had time to answer any of them because this has been the stupidest week, but I just wanted to tell you guys that I received no fewer than nine asks about Dabi’s hair. which, in a week filled with election memes and tumblr’s most cursed fandom briefly rising back up from the dead, is a pretty impressive feat for him if you ask me. like, I know I was making fun of it basically nonstop, but it sure did generate a lot of discussion so maybe I should rethink my opinions on Dabi’s PR strategies now, idk

anyway. it’s Saturday. time to catch up on this shit. let’s see how fucked the Todorokis are

OH NO HE’S CUTE

HOLY SHIT THIS IS TOO MUCH TO FUCKING PROCESS. I’M JUST TRYING TO ENJOY MY DAY HORIKOSHI, ARE YOU REALLY GOING TO TRAUMATIZE THIS POOR CHILD RIGHT IN FRONT OF MY SALAD

“thanks for being all right” the fuck

who allowed this child to be so cute. I’m serious. who signed off on this

how could a child this adorable possibly want to murder his equally adorable baby brother. please, your honor. there must be some mistake here

guess how prepared I am to read all about Touya’s tragic past. mm. that’s right. zero ready. none ready

anyway. TWO THOUSAND DEGREES LOLOLOL. NO TRACE OF A CORPSE HOW CONVENIENT. A PIECE OF HIS LOWER JAW BONE FFFFMSGHKLSh. LOVELY. LOVELY

LMAOOOOO

listen you guys. I just want to take a moment to appreciate that Horikoshi Kouhei did one of two things here. either (1) he planned it out FROM THE VERY START that Touya would be born with red hair Because Fire Powers, but would then have his hair turn white due to trauma, thus making the Dabi/Touya connection very slightly less obvious, although Let’s Be Real Who Are We Kidding. OR, (2) the anime got it wrong and gave him red hair, and rather than allowing this plot hole to continue to exist, Horikoshi took it upon himself to concoct this elaborate storyline and pretend it was never a plot hole at all! in which case I sure hope someone at Bones is sending him a VERY nice Christmas card this year. got this man sweeping up all your messes for you. you’re just lucky he has some sort of wild compulsion to address these things

anyways!!

FATHER AND SON. how sweet. :| still zero percent ready for any of this btw

STOP BEING CUTE

THIS IS RIDICULOUS. I’M SO MAD RIGHT NOW. HE IS THE SINGLE CUTEST CHARACTER IN THE ENTIRE SERIES, and do you even know how many other baby characters I’m betraying in order to say that?! baby Kacchan, baby Deku, baby Ochako, baby Shouto, Eri, baby Hawks. I’M LOOKING YOU DEAD IN THE EYE RIGHT NOW AND TELLING YOU THAT BABY TOUYA IS CUTER THAN ALL OF THOSE PLEBS. AND YOU’RE LOOKING BACK AT ME RIGHT NOW ALL “YEAH IT SURE IS A PITY ABOUT HIS JAW MELTING OFF THOUGH.” THAT’S IT, I QUIT THE SERIES

and Enji’s smiling at him. he’s so proud of him. but then Touya won’t be able to do it, and Enji’s gonna stop training him, and Touya’s gonna feel like a failure and keep pushing himself in order to try and win his dad’s affections back, because that’s all kids fucking want, all they want is just love, that’s fucking it, you couldn’t just give him that?? and then he’s gonna immolate himself fflkdlskfh THERE YOU SEE HORIKOSHI, I KNOW THE WHOLE STORY ALREADY, YOU DON’T HAVE TO DO THE WHOLE “SHOW THEM THE DEAD DOG” THING YET AGAIN YOU PIECE OF SHIT

OH SNAP THERE GOES THE TWIN THEORY. R.I.P.

BABY FUYUMI. PRETTY CUTE. NOT AS CUTE AS TOUYA THOUGH. HEY LOOK, NO REASON TO GET MAD AT ME I’M JUST STATING A FACT HERE

YEAH THIS IS GONNA GO REAL WELL OH BOY

I keep pressing the emergency stop button but this industrial tragedy machine just keeps on chugging along anyway, I’m pretty sure this thing is not up to code

:| I am so sorry sweet boy, Horikoshi is only getting started with you

FUCKING HELL WITH THIS NARRATION

but he wasn’t actually a child to you, he was just a little puppet child for you to live vicariously through!! and then you went and did the same fucking thing with Shouto afterwards and never learned your lesson until just six months ago!! fucking hell, Enji

so now he’s all “Touya is dead, that’s an unforgivable lie” fflkdhflk motherfucker does he look dead to you. if you really think that, tumblr and twitter have got a little over five years’ worth of archived theory posts to show you

oh shit Touya’s countering with “it’s an unforgivable truth”, which, damn. I actually think Horikoshi’s dialogue is one of his weaker points as a writer a lot of the time, but that comeback was snappy as fuck

actually guys, now that I’ve seen how ridiculously fucking cute baby!Touya was, I can almost understand why Shouto and Enji never put the pieces together before lol. any passing similarities would have easily been dismissed on account of he’d need to be at least 10x more adorable in order to get the full resemblance

OH MY GOD

NOW YOU SLEEP??? SO YOU POINT BLANK REFUSED TO PASS OUT WHILE YOU WERE BUSY MAIMING ALL OF MY FAVORITE CHARACTERS, BUT NOW THAT THERE’S AN OPPORTUNITY TO SEE YOUR REACTION TO THE “YOUR LIEUTENANT WAS SECRETLY RELATED TO ONE OF YOUR WORST ENEMIES THE WHOLE TIME” BOMBSHELL, YOU FINALLY DECIDE TO GET YOUR FORTY WINKS. I SEE

WOW DABI

I’M SURPRISED YOU DIDN’T ALREADY HAVE YOUR ANCESTRY.COM RESULTS PRINTOUT READY TO FOLD INTO A PAPER AIRPLANE AND ZOOM ON DOWN TO HIM

LOL NEVERMIND

gotta say, so far The Endeavor Pamphlet is just about as spicy as I could have hoped

(ETA: Natsuo’s face as he watches his beloved dead brother come back to life only to literally and metaphorically set everything on fire in one fell swoop is :/. why must you do this to me Natsu. can’t you see I’m trying to throw a Welcome Back Jeanist party here.)

HAVE YOU READ THIS?! TODOROKI ENJI ABUSED HIS OWN HEIR, AND DABI WROTE IT DOWN RIGHT THERE

WELL HE’S NEVER GON’ BE NUMBER ONE NOW / NEVER GON’ BE NUMBER ONE NOW / THAT’S ONE LESS THING TO WORRY ABOUT / THAT’S ONE LESS THING TO WORRY ABOUT

btw I neglected to mention this last week, but yes I do recognize and appreciate that this is Can’t Ya See-kun himself whom Horikoshi has chosen to be the face of this existential crisis which the general public is about to experience. rip CYS-kun

OOF

excuse me. putting aside the implications of Dabi sharing this context-less murder video of Hawks with the entire world for a moment, I just have to pause for a sec here, because when exactly did he get a chance to edit this all in?? complete with voiceover that seamlessly ties in with the prerecorded footage of him with DNA test results sans shirt?? you’re telling me this motherfucker, with all the smoke that was in the room thanks to his own quirk, somehow got a PERFECT SHOT of the PRECISE MOMENT when Hawks drove his feather knife into Jin’s back, using his MAGIC CAMERA THAT HE I GUESS HAD THE ENTIRE TIME IN THE POUCH RIGHT NEXT TO HIS BLEACH BOTTLE, and then immediately somehow got this very next shot as well FROM AN ENTIRELY DIFFERENT ANGLE

ALL THE WHILE IMMEDIATELY RUNNING THROUGH SCRIPT REVISIONS IN HIS HEAD, WHICH HE THEN PROCEEDED TO RECORD... WHERE, EXACTLY?? WITH SKEPTIC, WHILST RIDING ON MACHIA’S BACK??

AND THIS IS ALL YOU HAVE TO SAY FOR YOURSELF???

and this after I just wrote that whole long paragraph positively GLOWING about this man’s ability to plug up a plot hole. jfc. just scratch out every damn word I said lol. just forget all of it

are you fucking kidding me, the footage was from the cameras Skeptic planted on Hawks??

that’s... actually... okay you know what, it still doesn’t make any sense in the slightest, but the determination to address it nonetheless... just, dammit... I feel like I’m constantly at war with myself over whether or not I want to shake this man’s hand or slap him lmao. whatever, then!!

anyway, since Shouto and Enji can’t actually see the damage that Touya is dealing to the hero industry even as they speak, Touya is taking it upon himself to give them the highlights

I think it’s a testament to how much Endeavor cares about Hawks that he managed to zero in on that comment even amidst all the craziness of his eldest son returning from the dead to announce how he’s been carefully plotting their destruction for years and years. like, he heard “Hawks” and his face immediately went like that. you think he’s worried that Dabi did something to him? because he’d be right to worry lol

so the Endeavor Pamphlet narration is now explaining all about how Hawks totally killed the Number 3 Hero Best Jeanist as well! yep... he sure did... totally...

OH MY GOD WE’RE CUTTING TO HIM AHHHHH

Hawks, that is. lol. not Jeanist. NO, JUST MY POOR HALF-DEAD WINGLESS BABY SON

NOOOOO HIS LITTLE WING STUMPS. BUT SOMEHOW HIS FACIAL HAIR IS STILL INTACT. OH TO BE AN ANIME PRETTY BOY BEING SET ON FIRE. “HEY, TAKE IT EASY, WATCH THE FACE”

EXCUSE ME WHAT

interesting! we suspected as much, I think, with the clues that Ending dropped, and the little flashback right after the name reveal. still not clear how Dabi found out about it though!

looooool okay here we go, breaking out the heavy-handed holier-than-thou shit now

you know, I do find it interesting how trying to model themselves after All Might’s noble Symbol of Peace image has kind of ended up being the heroes’ undoing here. like, I could write a whole essay on this, but what it basically boils down to is that they were all trying too hard to be perfect. All Might went out there and did his thing and was amazing, and so the powers-that-be built an entire system centered around this seemingly-infallible person, and they acted like the system was infallible as well. and so most of the population ended up becoming complacent over the years, and meanwhile the people who were unfortunate enough to fall through the cracks understandably wound up disillusioned and perceiving the heroes as these false idols

anyway, but I think one positive takeaway from this is that the new up-and-coming generation of heroes represent a breakaway from that system. like, imo what we’re witnessing is the downfall of the Perfect Hero, and the rise of the imperfect hero. and this new generation doesn’t shy away from their failures or pretend like they never happened. they pretty much can’t pretend, because their failures are all right out there in the open for everyone to see. Bakugou Katsuki, just to name one example off the top of my very biased head, has had his own personal character journey basically play out right in front of the media’s eyes. his humiliation at the sports festival, his kidnapping by the League, and all of the fallout afterward. this isn’t someone who can ever go out there and convince the world that he’s perfect. but what he can do, instead, is show the world that he’s trying. that he’s trying with everything he has to do his best, to be the best. rather than this untouchable godlike image, it’s instead the image of someone painfully human who is nonetheless striving with everything he’s got to keep moving forward, flaws and all, and work his way to the top

and ultimately I think that’s going to be a much more positive image to send out to the world when all’s said and done. because rather than merely inspiring awe, heroes like that inspire people to take action themselves. or at least that’s what I hope! and not just Bakugou, but the others as well. we’ve got Shouto, whose own personal trauma is being aired in front of the whole nation even as I sit here ranting. we’ve got Deku, who cries at the drop of a hat, and who fought to become a hero despite being quirkless (and I think it’s only a matter of time before that eventually becomes public knowledge as well). tl;dr because I’m getting way too long-winded here, but these kids have effectively been humanized in a way that the old generation never was, and I think that’ll go a long way towards building trust between them and the people they’ll someday be protecting, and inspiring the next generation in hopefully a much healthier way

anyway so where were we. ...oh yes, Dabi was explaining that heroes only protect themselves, and is presumably building up to his grand conclusion of “therefore you should all just let the villains take over and burn down the world”

omfg. YOU GUYS

DOES CAN’T YA SEE-KUN’S SHARK FRIEND ACTUALLY CALL HIM “CAN’T YA SEE-KUN.” HE HAS A NAME YOU KNOW!! UNLESS HE LEGALLY GOT HIS NAME CHANGED TO CAN’T YA SEE-KUN. OH MY GOD

ALSO, IS THAT CAN’T YA SEE-KUN CRYING IN THE BOTTOM RIGHT THERE OMG. GIVE THIS CHILD A HUG. EVERYONE STOP WHAT YOU’RE DOING RIGHT NOW AND HUG HIM

BAKUGOU IS BARELY HANGING ON THERE LOL. GOTTA STAY CONSCIOUS... SO MUCH TEA BEING SPILLED... FOCUS... CONCENTRATE

IIDA’S ANGLING HIS HEAD IN A WEIRD WAY, LIKE DUDE. LOOKING SUSPICIOUSLY SNUGGLY THERE. MMM THESE IIDABAKU CRUMBS

HADOU IS ALL “WHAT EVEN IS ACTUALLY GOING ON” LMAO

LASTLY, POOR SHOUTO OMFG. WHEN YOU’RE ALL FINISHED HUGGING CYS-KUN THIS CHILD NEEDS YOUR ATTENTION!!

so now Dabi’s leaping off of this ninety-foot-tall gargoyle man like that’s a normal, smart thing to do. unless he can fly too now? saw his dad doing it back at Fukuoka and was all “hmm”

OH MY GOD SOMEONE TELL ME RIGHT NOW WHAT WORD SHOUTO IS USING TO ADDRESS ENJI, THESE TRANSLATIONS LOVE TO MESS WITH MY HEAD

ENJI GET MOVING DO YOU NOT SEE THOSE TEARS!!! SNAP OUT OF IT YOU BIG TREE

AHHHHH

OH KACCHAN YOU WOKE UP A LITTLE MORE THERE, HUH

lol he and Deku both look so determined but they’re basically sitting ducks. their “oh shit” faces do look remarkably like their “TIME TO SWING INTO ACTION” faces but don’t be fooled, they have one good arm and about six pints of blood left between the two of them. looks like this one’s all on you Shouto

-- AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH --

BAH GOD... WHAT’S GOING ON HERE... THAT’S BEST JEANIST’S MUSIC

y’all. can’t even talk right now, my brain has completely shut down lol. just. ...

  °˖✧◝(￣▿￣)◜✧˖°

[tommybaholland]

Hiya! I was wondering if I could request a one-shot with Sugawara where the reader is his best friend and secretly loves him but he doesn’t know? Then maybe another person catches his attention and the reader starts to distance themselves from Suga to try to spare themselves the hurt? Then maybe turns out the other person was just using Suga/wasn’t serious bout him and he realizes that the person he really loves is the reader but now they’re staying away from him and just angst and fluff and dramatic confessions?? Sorry if it’s far too much detail, I get carried away. Your writing is amazing, keep up the fantastic work!

somebody, some body

featuring: sugawara 

goddddd i’m so sorry i am late with a post AGAIN. this has been way overdue to be posted actually, and last night i finished it and was almost done with editing but accidentally lost everything i added and edited in the draft :// so thank you for being patient with me! this ended up being pretty long, so hopefully that makes up for the wait :) anyway, i really liked this idea! i have a little personal experience with this kind of situation, so it was fun to explore those feelings a bit. thanks for requesting and enjoy!

you didn’t always know that you would be in love with koshi sugawara. your dynamic was always friendly, and nothing more. so where did you go wrong?

when you think back to your history with suga, you could never find yourself resenting any time you spent with him. it all started when you moved into his neighborhood and as a shy child, you didn’t have the easiest time making friends. but he was a kind boy who was around your age and made it easy for you to form a bond with him. after all those years, neither one of you had changed that much. you were still reserved at heart but, he was the one who pushed you to things that you both could enjoy. 

one is joining the high school volleyball club together. you weren’t usually one to go outside of your comfort zone, but with him, you felt like you could do anything. he had you fuel your enthusiasm and you had him to thank for that. volleyball ended up being a great idea because it was quite a versatile sport that anyone could play. you found that you were quite athletic and took a liking to the libero position. there was just something exciting about digging a ball off the ground and rolling on the floor to get back up again. also, it looked pretty cool. 

so that was great until you hurt your shoulder during a game, which ended up being more severe than it seemed. now you couldn’t lift your left arm very far over your head unless you wanted to dislocate your shoulder again. it was already a tough recovery period because all you wanted to do was get back to the game. 

he was there with you for the entirety of it and even though he mostly encouraged you, he had to make sure you knew you wouldn’t do anything to hurt yourself. you felt helpless. it was the lowest he had ever seen you and he did everything he could to lift you back up again.

that was something you could never take for granted with him. 

the thing about you and suga is that you were in constant contact, especially during school. if it wasn’t sending each other funny memes or tiktoks, you were either on snapchat with each other or texting. sometimes simultaneously. 

are you alive?? 

yeah i’m awake, unfortunately

what do u want sugar-wara 

whoa how are you up this early lol and sugar is my thing ok

let’s go get sweet buns before class

ur right, it is ur thing. ur sugar-wara

okay i’ll meet you by the light in 15 

there was a lonely intersection in your neighborhood with a red stoplight that seems to have malfunctioned and now the light never stops blinking. you and suga lived on the same street, with the intersection being a perfect place to literally meet in the middle. 

“hey, sugar-- uh oh. someone doesn’t look so sweet today!”

he was always so peppy in the mornings. 

“yeah, well, maybe if someone didn’t wake me up with their annoying texts..”

“if you really don’t want to be woken up, you’d put your phone on do not disturb. you can thank me later for being your alarm clock.” 

he gave you a bright smile and a few head pats before you set off down the road to your favorite bakery which happened to be on the way to school. you didn’t go every morning, but most days it was necessary for you to start your day off right. 

“how’s the team looking this year, mr. vice captain?”

“pretty good, actually! four first years joined the team and one of them’s over six feet tall. our blocks will be unstoppable!”

 there were several things you loved about suga but, if there was one thing you enjoyed most, it was hearing him get psyched about volleyball. even though you couldn’t play anymore, his undying enthusiasm for the sport made you feel like you were living through him vicariously. 

“and there’s one who’s on the shorter side, only a little taller than noya. but he seems to have so much energy and drive, it’s just-- i don’t know, i have a feeling we could actually make it to nationals this year.” 

“wow, that’s great!” 

“you should come to practice and see them! also we just got asahi back so i need to make sure my sets really land.” 

“kou, you know i love watching you guys but isn’t that what kiyoko’s there for?”

“well, yeah, but you know how i play best!”

“yeah, sure. it’s not like i have anything better to do.” 

“you never let me down!” 

 his smile never let you down. 

it was your senior year of high school and it felt like things were going to be nothing but great.

“so...speaking of you knowing me best,” he started rather hesitantly.

“what would you do if i...made you dinner?”

“i...what?”

“oh, uh, oh, no. not, like, i make you dinner but, like...rei finally agreed to come around tonight and i thought i’d make something for them.”

“oh, um,” you tried to force a smile. “yeah, i think they’d like that.”

“yeah? you don’t think it’s too cheesy or anything? we haven’t hung out very much but i’d thought it would be a nice way to show them that i mean what i feel, you know?”

“yeah, yeah! that sounds perfect, kou..��

if only they knew that they were so lucky. 

you knew about this person, rei. they were your teammate and even a friend at one time. they transferred to karasuno during your second year and you bonded over your shared interest of the libero position. they didn’t get to play much that season until you got injured and had to quit playing. 

to see them fill that position so easily, it made you feel so type of way. a way that suga couldn’t know because even though he was there for you, he couldn’t deny his feelings. you remember when he told you that he liked them. about how he’s liked them ever since they came to karasuno and about how he was nervous to talk to them. 

and guess what?

you encouraged him. you encouraged him to try to pursue someone who you knew and liked, so now you had to hide that you were envious of both their position on the team AND the fact that your best friend is in love with them. 

at first, you tried to look at it as a positive point. you were still friendly with them, but volleyball was the only thing that connected you so you didn’t talk to them that much anymore. but now that suga, the person you’re closest to, was talking to them, it opened up the possibility that you would be able to reconnect with them. you had to be supportive. you were his friend, his closest friend, after all. 

-

the next morning you didn’t wake up from a text from suga. no, it took several snooze buttons to wake you up, which already put you in a bad mood. 

it’s ur turn now. are u alive??

i actually woke up to my alarms, how weird. u must be dead lol 

also have you done the english assignment yet? i need serious help >_<

you weren’t afraid to double, triple, even quadruple text him because more often than not, he did that to you. sometimes he’d even send longish paragraphs as he did later that day when classes had already started. 

hey sorry today has just been filled with fun and thriving and good stuff! rei asked me if i wanted to meet up with them before school last night and they made me some sweet buns and they were soooo good. i think we’re going to eat lunch together with some of their friends from vbc. ugh english sucks for me too. idk why you think i’m good at it

you almost jumped at the gesture to reply. it was never this long that he would go without text you at least one dumb thing. 

haha it’s okay don’t be sorry! so i guess last night went well?

also ur great at english sugar-wara what r u talking about??

it surprised you how quickly they seemed to become so friendly. it was kinda weird that he would already be spending a lot of time with her and now meeting all her friends. he probably already knew of them though, with volleyball and everything. the thoughts of how long you would have to wait for a reply crept in your mind, but that was quickly erased by an elapsed period of only a few minutes. 

yeah it went great! they had never had someone cook for them before, so they really liked it. this morning they told me they’d show me how to make fried eggs bc i said i dont know how to use a stove lol 

wait you made a whole meal for this person and u don’t know how to use the stove??

i used a crockpot and microwave ok :// don’t make fun of me dingus 

well a stove would definitely broaden ur horizons lmao that’s nice it went well though 

thank you i hope its going well 

that conversation was truly the end of the beginning. 

Every day after that seemed to happen the same way. you’d wake up, no text from suga. he hadn’t even replied to what you last said the previous night. you didn’t see him much either, but you knew who he was with probably. you would still stop by at volleyball practice where you did get to see him but they were there also. so you found yourself dipping out a lot more. 

it just felt weird. seeing him talk to someone he didn’t even know before. they didn’t even know him. even when you two were on the team together, they never once showed much interest in him and now it just seemed strange that they would. 

the transition was particularly difficult for you, as much as you didn’t want to admit it. one night you were so overwhelmed with work because you had waited too long to do it. frantically texting suga was an understatement. 

you knew you couldn’t put all your reliance on him but it was weird that he wasn’t replying on a school night as he was just as much a procrastinator as you. you dragged yourself through the night, trying to put together a somewhat coherent speech for english the next day. which, again, started as it had for the past few weeks. you still hadn’t heard from him, but it doesn’t even matter anymore. by the time he replied, it was almost embarrassing on your part. 

oh my god y/n i’m so sorry i didn’t reply sooner. i tried to get all my work done early so i could hang out with rei last night and i was asking my mom for advice and she told me to just pay attention to them as much as possible so i just wanted to be with them, you know? but i really hope you didn’t beat yourself up too much about it and that you got at least a little sleep. i’m sure your speech went well :) 

you sounded desperate for his help and meanwhile, he’s genuinely trying to show someone how much they mean to him. could you look any more stupid? 

you didn’t even want to reply but you felt like you had to. 

no don’t be sorry koshi! if anything i’m sorry i was just super frustrated in the moment and didn’t know what to do. i managed to pull something halfway decent together i think so it’s all okay now 

was it okay though? 

that was when you realized that things would never be the same. you’re his best friend and that’s simply it. you mean something to him, but not the same something that they mean to him. you couldn’t go to him when you help because then you’d be taking his time away from someone who wanted to feel that special meaning. it was a hard pill to swallow, for sure. but there were still several questions that lingered in the potential of what your relationship could be.

isn’t it possible to be both a best friend and a partner at the same time? you didn’t see any problem with it, so why couldn’t it be true? 

-

two weeks past and suga, your best friend, decided to let you in on some news. 

going up against all these powerhouse schools is definitely tough but it’ll help our team in the long run. we’re really amped to play seijoh soon but also i have an s/o now who can come and cheer us on 

WAIT you guys made it official?? when?

haha we’ve been official for like two weeks now 

oh well that’s great! 

(what the actual hell.)

months went by and you saw suga maybe two or three times. and only saw him, usually with the rest of the volleyball team or with rei and their friends. you texted now and then but it wasn’t the same. you had to accept that it wouldn’t be the same, so you did. you had a good group of friends who you spent more of your time with, as well as trying to focus as much as possible on school. entrance exams were coming up and you couldn’t let this be your downfall, even though you and suga had previously talked about possibly going to the same college together. but that wasn’t important anymore. 

you had your priorities and suga had his. 

which was the biggest reason why you decided not to go to the game against aoba johsai. you told him that you would try to make it, if schoolwork and college prep courses would lend you the chance. you were just trying to focus on yourself and work hard in on your own. you still texted him just to show that you still cared. 

sorry i couldn’t make it to the game! how did it go?

we lost :’(( we were so close too 

oh no :( i’m sorry kou. but i know you guys will get them next time!

he never replied, which only made you want to grow further from him. 

summer vacation rolled around and it was about a month out from suga’s birthday. a strange text appeared from someone you didn’t expect. 

Hey so I wanted to get manga for suga for his bday but I cannot for the life of me remember which ones he has so can you try to casually ask him which ones he has? like the next time you guys talk about manga or something?

you felt weird that they were asking for your help, considering that they now spent more time with him than you did. but you weren’t going to completely ignore them either.

to be honest we haven’t talked a whole lot lately but i’ll try to subtly ask him 

Okay awesome thanks!

what were you thinking of getting him?

Deathnote lol nothing original

hmm maybe the new aot volume? 

Yeah, that’s a good one. Or maybe BNHA

yeah that too! do you still want me to ask him? 

Yeah could you? 

yeah sure!

Yay thanks! 

okay i’ll let you know what i find out

going through with this was even worse. if it were you, you’d take him to see his favorite artist in concert. he wasn’t never much of a concert guy but he would talk about how badly he wanted to go see them live. or a more lowkey and personal option would be to customize a crewneck for him. you had a knack for designing and decorating plain-looking clothes and he would try to do it himself but would always remark how much better yours always turned out. 

but this time you’re simply the messenger and wouldn’t get that chance to get him something you know he’d love. not that he wouldn’t like manga, but it just seemed like they weren’t putting a ton of thought into it. maybe you couldn’t blame them though, it had only been a few months that they had been dating. 

that conversation honestly seemed more out-of-the-blue than anything, but you were hoping that suga would be as oblivious as ever. it didn’t even matter in the end because he never even answered your subtle way of asking. you didn’t feel like double texting because a.) you hadn’t done that in months and b.) it seemed too obvious. 

in the end, you did all that you could do and told rei that you had no information to provide, even after a week had passed. that was your, now monthly, interaction with suga that month. 

but it wasn’t like you weren’t thinking about him. 

your interactions moved from text to strictly snapchat, where you would hold streaks for considerable amounts of time. but every time you seemed to break contact with him, you found yourself blaming them. but you couldn’t blame them. they were with him, dating him. they had a right to claim a spot by his side. you had learned to pull back and just live your life. 

but life didn’t want you to have a great time either. albeit through a simple app like snapchat, he was the one asking you if you were okay. at this point, you would probably just deflect but somehow, you found yourself telling him about how you didn’t do so well on your entrance exams, despite having done what you could to prepare for them. you just thought you were so focused to do well, but maybe it was too much focus. you told him it would be alright. another notification came through.

snapchat from sugar wara  

you opened it to a selfie of him, one that was angled upwards to position him looking right up into the camera, his wide hazel eyes being the centerpiece of the photo. the caption simply said, “promise?”

and that was when it happened. you felt something different in your heart like it was knocked around in your chest. you smiled at the simple response and replied, “yeah i promise!!” 

it felt strange, but you finally admitted it, 

you were in love with koshi sugawara. 

timing was, without a doubt, a demise in all of your previous relationship endeavors. you could never seem to get that part right, also coming in too fast or not knowing if you should wait. you had only hoped that someone you liked would like you just as much. so catching feelings for someone, strong feelings at that, was not part of your current life plans. let alone with suga, someone you were, at one point, extremely close to. 

you know so much about him and what scared you was that your confession would be the only one that could mess up whatever relationship you had left with him. why couldn’t you just enjoy where you stood with him? why should your selfish feeling have to get in the way? 

stupid was an understatement as you how you felt. he was still dating rei, and that didn’t look like it was going to end anytime soon. you didn’t know what to do or how to cope. you can fight your feelings, but they can’t change right away. and for as long as you’ve known suga, the history you’ve shared with him, it seemed like these feelings weren’t leaving anytime soon. 

you spent the next couple of weeks trying to get everything out, while simultaneously trying to forget. you vented about it to your friends and while most of them offered advice, you stuck with just remaining stagnant. one of them suggested that you confess to him but that was what you feared most: that your feeling would become so overwhelming that you had to do something impulsive to relieve them. he would probably never talk to you again. there was nothing you could do. he was in a relationship with someone he really likes. why would you try to ruin that for him? 

you didn’t go to any of the preliminaries, mostly because of prep courses and trying to prepare for the next round of entrance exams. you still kept up with suga and saw that they won in the game against seijoh and we now going to the finals against shiratorizawa. you swiped up on his story and typed a simple, “omg that's amazing!! see I knew you guys could do it.” you continue to scroll through your phone, not thinking that much about it until a notification popped up.

sugar wara is typing…

snapchat from sugar wara

yeah it was great! Wish you could have been here though :(

me too! college prep courses seem to have been taking up all my time :P

is there any chance that you could try to find time to come to finals? 

we've been trying to get all the support that we can

plus it would be nice to see a familiar face there :) 

yeah i'll see what i can do to try to be there!

 wymd a familiar face? hasn't rei been going to the prelims?

they have been but we actually broke up about two weeks ago

i sort of initiated it but i promise it's okay

your eyes almost fell out of your head when you read that 2 weeks ago you were talking about how you were in love with him and were and decided to accept that it wasn't going to happen. now you're hearing that at the same time they had broken up? It seemed odd and... bittersweet. 

oh no i'm sorry kou :(

you bit your lip as you couldn't help but ask.

wdym you initiated it tho?

so kageyama has been killing it as our setter especially with his quick attack move with hinata 

rei was worried that i wasn't being treated fairly bc i'm a senior and vice-captain and all that. i tried to reassure them that i just want to see our team thrive and go to nationals but they still were worried about it and would talk about how they would go to games and never see me play once

it's been hard especially that it happened right before the seijoh game and now before finals

yeah i'm sure it's been difficult 

but don't beat yourself don't blame yourself so much! the team needs your support just as much as it needs players. nobody could replace that :)

thanks y/n :) i appreciate you so much

although you thought you would be happy, you can’t help but still feel weird about this whole thing. you felt like the ball was in your court but your bum arm couldn’t receive it properly. your feelings for him had been strong and you felt like you had to pack them all the way so now it just felt wrong to let them flow out again. but now that there was no conflict of interest, did you have to hide your feelings? 

it was more complicated than it was before. you didn't know how anything was going to play out at all and that kinda scared you. you did know one thing though, and that was how to be a loyal friend to suga because that's all you ever were from the start and that's what you could and would be for the future.

-

it was the friday before the finals game. 

you decided to stay late after school to maximize your focus on studying. it seemed to have worked because the sun was going down before you knew it. you wanted to get ahead on work so you could go to the game tomorrow. you and suga had been talking more recently and while it wasn’t as much as it used to be, it was more than it had been in the past several months. 

you quickly gathered up your things and left school for the night. the pretty orange and pink sky lit your way home through the quiet town and into the residential parts. at that point, the dark had met and light and-

“y/n! hey, wait!”

you turned to see none other than suga, jogging up behind you to catch up. you smiled at his sudden presence, looking past him to see the small group of the rest of the team. 

“hey! funny seeing you here.”

“yeah, haha,” he chuckled, catching his breath from suddenly running a considerable distance. “are you going home?”

“yeah.”

“can i walk with you?”

“of course.”

great! so i’m guessing you stayed late at school? you’re still wearing your uniform.”

“oh, yeah,” you affirmed, looking down at your monotonous outfit. “i just wanted to be all caught up on work and studying so i could go to the game tomorrow.”

“oh, yeah? that’s good to hear! yeah, we were-- we just had a late practice. coach left before us but we wanted to stay a little longer.”

“i hope you guys win tomorrow, it seems like you’ve been working really hard.”

“yeah, i hope so too. we’ve come a long way in such a short amount of time, it just feels like we can’t stop now.” 

you nodded in agreement. there was a beat of silence just then, and while it wasn’t awkward, it felt like something was lingering in the air.

“so, um,” he spoke up after several seconds. his eyes met yours and you felt that pang in your chest again, quickly looking away. “it’s been a while, huh?”

“yeah. yeah, it has, i guess,” you laughed lightly. you reached the intersection with the never-ending blinking stoplight and you turned around to face him.

“but i guess i’ll see you tomorrow, right?”

“yeah. yeah!”

“okay, get some sleep. goodnight.”

he nodded and you grinned at him before turning around to walk the rest of the way home until his voice stopped you again.

“hey, y/n?”

“yeah, kou?”

he looked down and all around, anywhere but your face.

“i, um, i know things have been kinda weird between for a while but it’s made me realize that i missed you, a lot.”

“yeah, i missed you, too.”

“but it’s also made me realize that i enjoy spending time with you and talking to you. like, even now, just talking to you makes me feel-- i don’t know. it makes me feel at ease like i’m home. and i’d really like to spend more time with you because i, um, i really like you.”

“you, you what?”

“i really like you, sugar.”

in all the ways you had imagined this happening, you never thought that you would feel your face fall to a frown, your heart beating in your ears. something just didn’t sit right with you about it.

“i, i, i don’t know what to say...”

“it’s okay if you don’t! i just wanted to tell you.”

“but why are you telling me this now?”

“do you-- do you not feel the same?”

“no. no! i’ve been wanting to hear you say something like that for so long, it’s just. you broke up with rei not too long ago and-- i don’t know. something isn’t right about it.” you shook your head, unsure of what you were trying to say.

“it’s how i feel,” he shrugged. “i just wanted to tell you and have a good feeling to hold onto to make tomorrow a little easier.”

you looked at him in disbelief.

“oh, so you think you can confess all that to me right before this big game and that i’ll automatically reciprocate those feelings when you just broke up with someone not even a month ago? i’m not a second choice--”

“no, sugar, listen, that’s not how i meant it at all--”

“no sugawara.” those words made him go quiet instantly. you never used his full name, there was always some sort of play on it, so this was serious. 

“maybe that’s not how you meant it, but that’s how i’m taking it. i’ve been wanting to tell you for so long how i felt but i wanted to respect your feelings so i didn’t. so please, respect mine. i’m not the good luck charm that you can just confess to and expect that it’ll all be okay. this just isn’t right. i’m sorry, koshi. 

your voice broke as his name left your lips, tears beginning to fall. you didn’t even give him a chance to respond, a rush of adrenaline telling you to quickly turn and get out of there. 

-

you didn’t get much sleep that night. 

it was hard not to think about your conflicted feelings over suga’s confession. you had hoped for that moment for a long time but the timing simply wasn’t right. how funny and ironic is that? you thought your timing was off. maybe you were meant for each other in that way. you couldn’t help but let your feelings get the best of you and you were beginning to become what you feared most from him. you thought he would immediately reject you and make you feel bad about ever saying anything about how you felt. but the roles are reversed and that was the part that blindsided you the most. 

you didn’t think that how you reacted was wrong but you also couldn’t imagine how he was feeling right now. he just wanted to feel good right before a big game but that backfired right in his face. some might call it karma, but part of you thought he didn’t deserve it. 

the pressure was setting in as the game went into the fifth and final set. what made it worse was kageyama wouldn’t be starting that set, his nose bleeding from the spike he took to the face. suga was genuinely thrilled to be a teacher, a mentor, and a support system for his fellow teammates. he didn’t mind that another, rather talented, setter had joined the team because that meant he wouldn’t have to worry about passing the position over to someone who he thought didn’t deserve it. 

he almost forgot he was actually a player on the team when everyone looked to him to fill in. this was his moment and it just happened to be at the most overwhelming part of this game. Both teams were tired while simultaneously running on pure adrenaline to see who was going to come out on top. 

suga had an opportunity, not only to start the set but be the trailblazer for their success. 

the nerves set in as he held up the paddle with the number nine on it, kageyama holding it up with him for a moment. It was symbolic in a way. suga always thought he’d be passing the baton to him, his successor as karasuno’s official setter, but this felt just as sentimental. Suga hadn’t played much this season but he got to watch the team grow into something that it once was: something great. They’ve had their share of loss and strife but it finally seemed like they had come so far and the only direction they can go is up. 

the nerves set in as he looked around, anywhere to ease them. His eyes automatically went to the team banner, black with the simple word ‘fly’ written over it, where all the school and their supporters were watching. he went down the line quickly but the wave of a hand caught his eye. his eyes shifted back and felt that familiar grin on him.

it was you. 

“c’mon suga! You can do it!”

and so he did. 

once the final ball hit the ground, the room was quiet with shock. it had been tight for most of the game but no one really expected this outcome. they were going to nationals. daichi, suga, and asahi embraced, taking in the satisfying feeling of victory. 

after the awards ceremony, you were buzzing with excitement for them, trying to calmly follow the rest of the crowd out of the gym. you could tell they were somewhere along the hallway as another crowd formed to congratulate the winning team. you weaved in and out of it, even getting on your toes to see if you could spot a familiar head of gray hair. 

you finally caught a glance at him from afar, his smile growing as his eyes locked onto yours.

“y/n!”

you mimicked his expression and found your feet moving quicker than your brain could process. he put in the same amount of haste to meet you in the middle. you both stopped at about an arm’s length away from each other. his flushed cheeks and slightly red but glistening eyes held your smile as you decided to speak first. 

“hey, kou.”

“hey, sugar.”

another minute couldn’t be wasted as you finally crashed into one another. it felt better to hold somebody that you knew and genuinely loved. you could be sure that he felt the same way as he held your body tightly against him. 

heyo haikyuu night! send any requests right here..

[clarionglass]

tagged by @gentlemancrow, thanks for the tag! :)

1. Why did you choose your url? i think i chose this back in the heady days of uh. year 8 or 9? for my old ff dot net account and/or deviantart, and it’s just stuck ever since! it was back in my skulduggery pleasant fandom days, and the concept of chosen names has always struck me as pretty cool, so i was messing around with picking one, and clarion glass stuck! it’s been my username for literally everything for years now, and clarion/clari has become the name i respond to on the internet :)

2. Any side blogs? yes but also no? i have three, technically, but none are active anymore. one was set up for a creative project for my greek and roman mythology unit in third year (i was blogging as ariadne, it was a fun time :) ), i’m not gonna give the url to that one because it’s entirely defunct @honestoperarecaps was set up as a study tool for my opera unit bc i thought i’d remember things better if i vented about the operas i had to watch in a mildly humorous way. it worked, but i only had the time and energy for one post :’) if you want to read my vent about don giovanni act one then click on over i guess :P and lastly is the good old school of music quotebook! it’s password locked bc it was just for me and my mates to put up the weird quotes that people said around the department (it was back before the SoM had a name change and became “the con,” so that dates it), and my god there were many. damn, i need to have a reread through those :) @bejewelled2deluxe that was a good time :D

3. How long have you been on tumblr? a while and a half! i think i got it in about 2014 or 15, but i lurked on my mates’ blogs from about 2012 without actually getting an account. so i lived through superwholock, but vicariously :’)

4. Do you have a queue tag? ha ha ha ha ha ask another question (i do not. i post 50 things at once or nothing at all.)

5. Why did you start your blog in the first place? like i said before, i was a lurker for a good few years before i caved! i’m a fandom nerd, as well as a sucker for a good meme, and the communities that my friends were in seemed pretty chill. i knew for ages i was gonna get a tumblr, but i just didn’t want to distract myself during Important School Times (i was entirely correct in thinking it’d be a black hole for all my time :’) )

6. Why did you choose your icon/pfp? oh man, there’s a q! i’d done a few drawings from the queen’s thief series about the time i signed up (if you haven’t read it go read it, it’s Fantastic), so i nicked a headshot off one of them bc she looks vaguely slightly like me :P this one is the queen of eddis! such a good character, i love her to pieces :)

7. Why did you choose your header? it doesn’t come up in my blog theme on pc so i forget what it is..... is it the lantern tree? it was just a cool pic, i love lanterns in trees yo blog title i definitely know where that came from, as does anybody who knows me in person,,,, it’s a tempo direction off a piece of music by That Goddamn Dude, and it just clicked with me

8. What’s your post with the most notes? my crocheted tiny martin photoset :)

9. How many mutuals do you have? no idea, my love, absolutely none

10. How many followers do you have? uh 184 apparently but i do need to do a weed for porn bots :/ if you’re part of the 184 and you’re not a porn bot and i don’t know you irl then hello! i don’t know where you’ve come from (tbh it’s probably the chatfic now i think about it) but you are very welcome, and i hope you’re not too put off by my extremely sporadic posting!

11. How many people do you follow? uh. 70. i have a very,,,, curated,,,, dash experience. :|

12. Have you ever made a shitpost? not really? i’ve shat out some odd thoughts on tma, if that counts :P

13. How often do you use Tumblr each day? i like to scroll to the end of my dash (hence the answer to q11 lol), and i get bored easily, so i often scroll through on my breaks and in the morning when i wake up :) that said, i only reblog stuff when i’m on my laptop bc i like to tag ramble and that’s just too much effort on my phone

14. Did you have a fight/argument with another blog once? hell no, i’m very conflict averse plus who the hell is going to fight with me? i’m the smallest of small fry :P

15. How do you feel about “you need to reblog this” posts? i ignore them bc i do not need to be guilted into reblogging things tyvm (((:

16. Do you like tag games? for sure! i always take approx 2390358 years to respond to them but they’re cool as hell, plus i like being thought of :)

17. Do you like ask games? ditto the previous :)

18. Which of your mutuals do you think is Tumblr famous? i’m mutuals with a few Fandom People, but idk if anyone’s like. big famous? and i’m pretty sure nobody who’s big famous follows me back lol i just like to stick to my small corner of the internet :) if i’m wrong that’s rad as hell tho!

19. Do you have a crush on a mutual? nah but i love y’all as friends!

this is the tag part! which i hate doing! if you see this on your dash consider yourself tagged if you want to do it :) @idris-the-potterhead if you need to take a break from lab work then go for it :)

[luvdsc]

hey there bub! i was going thru ur masterlist and i saw in the "about" section that u made eye contact with taemin OMG how did that go AAAAA u got to make eye contact with THE lee taemin? soo lucky :") i bet this happened prob awhile back but how was the superm concert? i'm sure it was amazing n so much fun AAAAA sadly they didn't go here in my city :( but i was able to see NCT dream live during their dream show tour and i tell you WHEW GOSH those boys are so ethereal??? like they look so good in vids and in pics but they're 1000000x better in person??? like pictures don't do their beauty justice?? gosh i could write a full on essay abt this. until now i still cant believe i got to see the dreamies live?? its feels so surreal like a dream, its crazy. i remember the lights dimming and 'dear dream' started playing in the background and i just lost it lol i was shaking and bawling my eyes out n the show hasn't even started yet djkfkjn i first noticed jisung n when i saw him the first thing that popped in my mind was: "he is SO tall and he's soso cute dear lord :")" and the way he dances, a frickin dance king?? he's rlly such a born performer. AND OHMYGOD JENO, the man is rlly WOW, ngl he kinda looks intimidating with his sharp features and smooth dance moves but his eye smiles make my heart mELT. i remember during the encore stage, the show was about to end and the boys were saying goodbye to us, jeno's face was showed on screen, he was tryna eat the confetti LMAO. renjun,, i will never shutup abt this but renjun is confirmed to be a FAIRY!! the prettiest boy :") #RENJUNFAIRYAGENDA he has such sharp yet delicate features and his aura is just so warm n comforting like he just captivates u n lures u in, and when he sings, like u can feel the emotion, hes so talented. all throughout the show, hyuck was just GLOWING (lives up to his name, fullsun uwu) . he's soso pretty n he's my bias so i literally was just in awe when i saw him, i was speechless :') he was rlly entertaining to watch n he was also so attentive to the crowd esp when he saw some ppl that got hurt, he kept telling us to move back a little. OMG HOW COULD I FORGET NANA, jaemin was soo sweet n charming and the way his eyes lit up whenever he looks at the crowd gosh my heart was abt to burst he rlly adores czennies :") jskfvkds hes also super tall lmao hyuck was tryna lift his shirt up tho and of course chenle, ngl but all throughout the concert, my eyes just keep coming back to chenle. out of all the dreamies, he caught my eye the most. like,, THE POWER THIS MAN HOLDS IS CRAZY?? THIS MAN DIDNOT COME TO PLAY!! his stage presence is crazyy ohgod esp during 119 performance, and he looks like a prince in real life. he also played the piano and i remember everyone was just in awe as he played like the whole crowd had heart eyes for him. it was such a fun n amazing experience, the boys were so amazing n talented, they rlly know how to put on such a great show. they work tirelessly n they're so good, like their voices and dance moves, srsly amazing :") ++ it so memorable cus it was my first kpop concert hehe. buying tickets were such a pain in the ass ngl it was so stressful but SO worth it 🥺 i knew jisung was tall but i didnt know he was THAT tall, idk if im just small but they all rlly look so tall JKDFSDJVFF sadly mark wasnt there :( sorry if i made this long, i just got excited and i thought it'd be nice to share my concert experience w/ u as well hehe 😅 i hope you're doing great bub!! <3

- 🐼 anon

omg hi yes, i was lucky enough to score tickets to see superm last year, and i was right up against the main stage railing !!! 🤩 so ten made eye contact and smiled at me, baekhyun also made eye contact and smiled and waved at me (he’s my exo bias and i was like the heart clutching meme when he did that), i yelled “you’re doing great sweetie” when taeyong took a pause during commentary time and he said thank you 🤧, and god taem looked at me for a good 20 seconds smiling at me and i couldn’t handle it and had to blink and look away and he laughed at me 😔 akslhflakshdfla but oh my god, lucas is so goddamn attractive irl it’s insane, and ten is sooo so pretty like i didn’t even pay attention to what they were saying during the commentary time sometimes i was just staring at ten who was in front of me and i was the starry eyed emoji (baek and ten were right in front of me, lucas was next to them), and pictures don’t do taeyong justice at all like that man is absolutely ethereal ✨✨  also!!!!! seeing ten perform his solos, hearing taeyong and mark rap irl and of course BASS GO BOOM BY LUCAS BECAME MY ABSOLUTE FAVORITE WHEN ARE THEY RELEASING THAT SONG??? and i was in tears when taemin performed right in front of me like 16 year old me would be shaking in her boots if she knew she would see god taem in the flesh. actually current me was shaking askdjfhalksjdf i cherish all the videos i took so much (i accidentally deleted the entire jopping video except the mark rap part when i was trying to snip it to post to my insta story and cried rip 😭😭)

YOU GOT TO SEE THE DREAMIES IRL OH MY GOD I’M SO JEALOUS 😭😭 I WANNA SEE THEM PERFORM SO BAD!!! i keep rereading your entire experience and i’m living vicariously through you now aklshdflakjsdhfda oh my god, i wanna see jisung and fairy prince renjun perform live so bad 😭 i got to see hyuck perform three times now with 127, and he’s absolutely amazing, i couldn’t stop watching him dance like he’s my number one favorite performer in nct and the way he dances is heavenly and wonderful and his voice is insane 💖 he truly was born to be an idol 🤧💞💞 i want to write a proper response to each of your description of the dreamies but right now i’m just like no thoughts head empty just heart eyes for every single one of those boys 🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸 aaaa thank you for describing them all, angel, i’ll keep this in mind as i write fics :’) omg and this was your first kpop experience???? you’re so lucky!!!! 💓 also i feel with the buying tickets omg i always have to get up early and keep refreshing on every device to get decent tickets and it’s so stressful askljdfhaksd but it definitely is so worth it in the end! my only regret is opting out of seeing skz last year and going to a party instead rip and omg no need to apologize!!! it’s really fun to hear about your concert experiences, sweetpea!!! 💞 thank you for taking the time to share that with me 💘  i’m doing wonderful and enjoying my weekend, and i hope you’re having a good weekend and doing well also, angel 🐝💛✨

[rotationalsymmetry]

You know what? That wasn’t even the point I wanted to make.

There is no “waste of time” or “waste of life”. Specifically TV shows and movies aren’t a waste.

What there is:

Numbing behavior to put off dealing with feelings (which is bad if you get stuck in it but can be adaptive for short periods)

Experiencing positive feelings: joy, mirth, comfort, etc.

Experiencing negative feelings in a controlled way: angst, rage, sadness, fear.

About those last two: vicarious emotions can help people release acute and chronic stress. Laughing, crying, getting excited or disappointed about how your sports team is doing this week, feeling scared for the protagonist at the worst point of the movie and relieved and happy at the ending; this stuff doesn’t just feel good, it serves a biologically necessary purpose. Modern Western society is set up so that you’re not supposed to cry when your boss is impatient with you or yell back when a customer yells at you for things that aren’t your fault. But when you have feelings that you don’t express, there’s hormones and stuff that don’t get fully processed until you get a chance to experience those feelings properly later on. (Or, physical activity works really well too.) Most of this happens through things we call “entertainment” or “leisure”.

Also I’m framing that in terms of health, but it’s absolutely fine and perhaps more realistic/sensible to frame emotional well-being as a terminal value independent of physical health effects.

Social bonding: through watching things together, talking about them afterwards, being part of a community based around shared enjoyment of a show or movie, etc. (this is also both a health thing and its own value.)

(What, you thought health was all about eating vegetables and getting enough exercise? Nope.) (or that it was only about unpleasant things? Also nope.) (or that it was mostly about not being fat? Definitely nope.) (I’m reading Burnout right now, can you tell?)

Sense of identity, getting to know yourself, through that fandom community thing and/or through watching characters that you identify with. Self-improvement through deciding you want to be more like a certain character, or less like another character.

As with other stories: learning how to get through tough situations by having it modeled. Making sense of life by comparing your life to stories.

Creative expression: daydreaming, fanfic, fan art, making collections of still images or gifs, memes, etc.

Like many other things in life, it’s possible to watch too much TV. People have predictable patterns of doing too much (more than is optimal, sometimes enough that it’s actively harmful) of the easy, low-resistance and fast-reward things and too little of the high-resistance delayed-reward things.

But TV and movies generally being low-resistance fast-reward activities, and therefor being relatively easy to overdo, doesn’t mean that they’re bad, or that they’re lacking in positive value. In fact, being accessible to a very wide range of people is a good thing. People who are temporarily injured or sick watch TV, young children, the elderly and chronically ill, people who can’t read, people who can’t afford much, people who live in areas where there’s not a lot to do, people who can’t leave home for whatever reason, people struggling with the psychological aftereffects of trauma. A lot of people with very, very limited options in life can and do still watch TV, and that is a very, very good thing. And enjoying certain shows or types of shows when you’re healthy, means you’ve got at least one thing you know you’ll still enjoy if you lose your health.

(When you lose your health, as everyone does eventually. It’s just that some people lose it all in one go and then there’s nothing left to do but the funeral, and some people lose it partially and then have to figure out how to live well with fewer options than they’re used to.)