#so if we have to stay home not only am i out like $70 in the non-refundable tickets

[doctordiscosbignaturals]

bf has a 102.1 degree fever, i’m doing everything i can (ice pack/medicine/fluids) to break it

it’s literally his birthday tomorrow and i have so many things planned that he has no clue about 🥲 i’m going to feel sooooooooooo bad for him if he has to spend his birthday sick

[mclennonlgbt]

(JUST LIKE) STARTING OVER WAS DEFINITELY FOR PAUL – a compilation

A meaningful wordplay As you know, John attached great importance to the lyrics of his songs. He liked to smuggle in word games and hidden meanings. Let's look at a fragment of the lyrics of "(Just Like) Starting Over". It's time to spread our wings and fly Wings was Paul's band in the 1970s.

Don't let another day go by

"Another Day" is a song by Paul and Linda that was released as the A-side of a non-album single in February 1971. It was Paul's debut single, following the Beatles break-up in 1970. (Sidenote: giving credits to both himself and Linda, Paul broke up the Lennon-McCartney partnership, angering Allen Klein).

my love

"My Love" is a 1973 song by Wings. The single was viewed as Wings' first significant success.

2. The demos

In the first demo, John uses the word "walrus":

Everyday we used to make it love so why can’t we be making love – it’s easy. The time has come, the walrus said, for you and me to stay in bed again, it’ll be just like starting over

The walrus is a famous motif from Beatles songs. In the song "I Am The Walrus" (1967) John declares that he is the titular walrus, a year later in "Glass Onion" he stated: „And here’s another clue to you all – the walrus was Paul”. In "God" (1970) John sings: "I was the walrus." In an interview from 1969 or 1970, George jokes: „And if you are listening, I am the walrus too”. Regardless of which Beatles was the walrus, John is for sure giving us an interesting clue here.

As for „in bed”:

Here's another fascinating demo... This requires no comment. It's just that John suddenly referred to "Why Don't We Do it In the Road", a song by Paul from the Beatles era.

EDIT:

The whole fragment is:

Just take your clothes off honey, and stick your nose in money.. why don’t we… do it in the road?! (Laughs) A little hotel where we used to screw A little place down in Montauk Just you, me, the cook and the servants too

As @i-am-the-oyster pointed out (the screen is theirs) - it's a 17 minute drive from Paul's house in the Hamptons to Montauk Motel.

3. John explaining who the song is for

„I’m not aiming, I am not aiming at 16 year olds. If they can dig it, please dig it. But when I was singing and writing this and working with her, I was visualizing all the people of my age group from the 60s. Being in their 30s and 40s now, just like me, and having wives and children and having gone through everything together, I am singing to them! I hope the young kids like it as well, but I’m really talking to the people that grew up with me and saying: „Here I am now, how are you? How’s your relationship going? Did you get through it all? Wasn’t the 70s a drag? You know, here we are, let’s try and make the 80s good, you know, because it’s still up to us to make what we can of it. It’s not out of our control”. I still believe in love, peace. I still believe in positive thinking when I can do it. I’m not always positive but when I am, I try and project it”.

Source: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rqxPx2Tvf6A

Let’s point out that the song which convinced John to come out of retirement was „Coming up” by Paul. You want a love to last forever One that will never fade away I want to help you with your problem Stick around, I say

(…)

You want some peace and understanding So everybody can be free I know that we can get together We can make it, stick with me

BONUS (this is not evidence or premise, but maybe Paul understood that the song was addressed to him): Paul's reaction to the song after John's death.

„…Time passed. Paul locked the door of his home studio and played (Just Like) Starting Over, the first single from Double Fantasy. Top volume. For days”.

- Christopher Sandford, „McCartney”

EDIT:

(it's also @i-am-the-oyster's reveal): One Sweet Dream podcast did an interview where May Pang agreed with the host (JL)SO was for Paul and emphasised that it wasn't about Yoko -- it's a patrons-only episode so I can't link it, but it's April 2023, around the 1h29 mark).

[sequinsmile-x]

Stained Glass Windows - Chapter Sixty Eight

Life was complicated, but they wouldn't have it any other way.

-x-

Hi besties <3

As always, the love for this version of them means the entire world. Sorry for the delay in this chapter - my brain wasn't working for the multi chapters whilst it was being melted by the mumps, but I am on the mend so here we are.

Cannot believe we are close to 70 chapters on this. I still have a lot to do with this version of these two, so as I've said before as long as you guys read and still enjoy this I will keep writing it.

As always, please let me know what you think - feedback means the world <3

-x-

Words: 3k

A full list of warnings for the fic can be found on the Series Master List.

Read over on Ao3, or below the cut

“Son of a bitch,” Emily grunts as she lowers herself onto the couch, her hand pressing against her immobilised shoulder as it’s jostled as she sits down sending pain through her upper body. 

Aaron drops the bags in the hallway, his body tensing as she calls out in pain. He rushes into the living room, his eyebrows furrowing as he looks at her, walking over his hands on his hips as he approaches the couch, “Are you okay, sweetheart?” 

She smiles as she looks up at him, releasing a slow breath as the pain dissipates. He looked like he hadn’t slept since he left Pakistan. He’d barely left her side in the hospital, his hand wrapped tightly around hers as she slept fitfully through the one night the doctors had insisted she’d stayed. He was bordering on coddling her, but she knew he needed this. That looking after her was a way of trying to alleviate any guilt he felt for leaving in the first place. 

It was a conversation for another day, something she’d raise with him when she was feeling better and he didn’t look like he was going to collapse at any moment. 

“I’m okay,” she assures him, her hand slipping from her shoulder to her lap, “Is JJ on her way with Lily?” 

He nods and sits next to her on her good side, making sure he’s careful so he doesn’t jolt her, “I called just before we left the hospital.” 

Emily sighs, resting her head back on the back of the couch, her eyes drifting closed as she thinks about seeing her little girl. It felt much longer than the one day it had been since she’d seen her, a hollow feeling in her chest that only holding Lily would fill,  “Good. I missed her.” 

He smiles sadly as he looks at her profile, his eyes drifting over the features he’d memorised a long time ago, the ones she’d passed on to their daughter and that he hoped she’d pass on to any future children they’d have. “I missed her too.” 

She turns her head to look at him, smiling sadly as their eyes meet. She feels guilt rush over her, pulling her under as she reaches over with her good hand and curls it around his. It was a feeling she’d started to forget. She’d lay in their bed at night unable to sleep and desperately try to remember the feeling of his hand in hers, his fingers slotted between hers, the spaces the perfect size as if they’d been made for each other. She tries to memorise it again, and tries to make sure she doesn’t take it for granted. 

“I’m sorry,” she says, lifting their joining hands to kiss his knuckles, “I can’t imagine…” she drifts off, not sure how to put it into words. She missed Lily after one day, she couldn’t put herself in his shoes - couldn’t imagine how she would feel if she’d been the one who had been gone for as long as he had. 

“It’s not your fault sweetheart,” he says, leaning in to stamp a kiss to her cheek, taking the time to breathe her in, “I’m the one that agreed to go.” 

She hums in response and they fall into silence, the usual peace they both found in their home tinged with an awkwardness she hates. She rests her head on his shoulder and smiles to herself when he rests his cheek on top of her head, an automatic reaction to her affection, something they’d done countless times. 

“You know what’s a shame?” She asks, looking down at their joint hands, watching as he runs his thumb back and forth over the heel of her hand. It was something else she’d missed, the subtle kind of affection she’d lived without the first 37 years of her life but had become too used to the last three. She already knew that she didn’t want him to do something like this again, she hadn’t truly wanted him to this time, but she also knew how important his job was. 

That was another conversation they’d have to have another day, one of many that seemed to be piling up somewhere in the back of her mind. Including the job offer to lead the Counterterrorism unit that she hadn’t mentioned to him yet.

“What?” He asks, pressing a kiss to the top of her head, enjoying the closeness he’d been deprived of for weeks.

“If I’d been t-boned by that jackass just five days earlier you would have been here for our wedding anniversary.” 

It takes a moment for him to realise what she’s said, and a laugh of disbelief escapes him as he pulls back to look at her, his brows creased as he shakes his head, “Em.”

She laughs, the sound turning into a groan as it makes her shoulder ache, “Sorry,” she says, sounding anything but, “Too soon?” 

“Yes,” he replies quickly, shaking his head at her. The air briefly stolen from his lungs as he remembers the call he’d received from JJ, the panic that had taken residence in his chest and hadn’t gone anywhere until he’d made it to his wife’s side. He breathes in deeply, sucking in hair and the peace only she could give him, and he blows it back out, choking on another laugh as he carries on, “Too soon,” he confirms, shaking his head as she presses her lips together, a half attempt at an apologetic smile flitting across her face, “I am sorry about our anniversary.” 

She shrugs her working shoulder and sighs sadly. She can’t say that it’s okay, that she hadn’t missed him. She’d spent their anniversary with just Lily, a quiet evening pacing around the nursery as she soothed her teething baby. Haley had sent her an anniversary card with Jack the next day, an understanding smile on her face as she passed it over. 

“When my shoulder is better we’ll make up for it,” she says, cupping his cheek, enjoying the scrape of his beard against her skin, “We’ll be making up for a lot of lost time.” 

He smiles and leans in to kiss her, taking the opportunity to sweep his tongue through her mouth, capturing the contented sigh she sets free. When he pulls back he rests his forehead against hers, “I’m looking forward to it.” 

___

Emily tries to get up the moment she hears Lily crying from the nursery, ready to get off of the couch to go upstairs and get her, but Aaron stops her, his hand on her thigh as he squeezes.

“I’ll get her,” he says, pressing a kiss against her temple, “You stay here.” 

She opens her mouth to argue with him, but she stops herself, knowing he needs time with Lily, that she has to get used to sharing the load with him again. She also knew since her shoulder was immobilised, and therefore her arm, she wouldn’t be able to lift her baby up from the crib by herself anyway

“Okay,” she says, smiling at him, “Bring me my baby.” 

He winks at her, “Yes ma’am.” 

He walks upstairs, following the sounds of his daughter’s cries, and he smiles at her as he walks into the room. She was standing up, holding onto the edge of the crib, something she couldn’t do before he left, her face screwed as she cries. He knew in the grand scheme of things that it hadn’t been that long, but he couldn’t believe how much she’d grown. She was bigger, her hair longer, her face impossibly more like Emily’s - something he hadn’t thought was possible - and even more of her personality had started to develop. 

“What's this all about, Lily-Pad?” He asks soothingly as he walks over, lifting her into his arms. She shakes her head and tries to wriggle out of his embrace, her tiny hands pressed against his chest, something that makes him chuckle at first as he balances her on his hip, “I know sweetheart, you want Mama. But she’s got a bad shoulder so you’ll have to put up with me doing all the heavy lifting for a little while.” 

Lily grumbles as if she understands him, a frown on her face that would rival his own, every bit as adorable as it always had been on her sweet face. 

He couldn’t deny that it hurt that since she’d come home that morning she’d resisted it every time he’d picked her up to feed her or change her diaper. She’d looked at Emily each time, her eyebrows furrowed as she reached out for her, making noises so close to actual words it made him ache. He knew it was natural, that Emily had been her only caretaker for the last couple of months, that the little girl had got used to how life looked without him, but it didn’t make it any less difficult to take. Lily had always been all about Emily, ever since the moment he’d first handed her to her, but she’d never resisted him before. 

“Mama.” 

He snaps out of his thoughts at the sound of her voice, at the first clear word he’d ever heard her say. He looks at her, a disbelieving laugh escaping his chest as he holds his little girl closer.

“What did you just say Lils? Did you say, Mama?” 

There’s a moment of silence, a brief pause as she furrows her brow before she says it again, wriggling in his arms again, “Mama.” 

He kisses the side of her head and walks out of the nursery, moving quicker than he thought he ever had in his life. He gets to the living room in record time with Lily in his arms, surprising Emily with his speed. Her eyes go wide, panic flaring in her chest as she looks over their daughter to make sure there is nothing wrong.

“Aaron, is she okay-”

“She’s fine,” he says, sitting on the couch next to her, sitting Lily on his lap, securing her to him with one arm as he points at Emily, “Who’s that Lily?”

Emily frowns as she looks back and forth between the two of them, the room falling into silence as Aaron looks at their baby girl expectantly, “Honey, what-”

“Lily,” he says, cutting Emily off with a smile, holding her close, “Who’s that? Is that Mama?” 

There’s another pause, another beat of silence, and Emily is about to roll her eyes at her husband and his strange behaviour when Lily reaches out for her. 

“Mama.” 

She gasps and puts her hand over her mouth, joy filling her lungs so quickly she chokes on the laugh that escapes her, “Did she just…” she asks, looking up at Aaron, smiling when she sees tears shining in his eyes before she looks at Lily, “Did you just say, Mama?”

“Mama,” Lily says again, frowning as she reaches for her again, her hands forming into fists as she tries to get out of Aaron’s embrace, clearly confused as to why she wasn’t in her mother’s arms. 

“She said it upstairs,” Aaron explains, handing over the little girl gently, making sure that she’s settled against Emily’s good side, “She was so fed up with seeing me she decided to say it for the first time.”

Emily chuckles and holds Lily close, pressing a kiss to the top of her head as tears slip free from her lash line, “I love you so much, sweet girl,” she says, kissing her again, “I love you so much.” 

“She loves you too,” Aaron says, reaching out and wiping the tears from her cheeks since she couldn’t, her only available arm holding Lily to her chest. He sighs contentedly and wraps his arm around her, holding both of his girls in his arms, “I can’t wait to hear her say Dada.” 

Emily freezes briefly, a quick thing he thankfully misses as he tickles Lily’s stomach, drawing out her sweet laugh. Guilt burns her from the inside out, making her cheeks warm as she thinks of the secret she is keeping from her husband. She shakes it off, hoping she was making the right decision by protecting him from one of the things he’d missed. She looks up at him and smiles, pressing a kiss to his cheek. 

“Me neither.”

___

She yawns as she walks into the master bedroom, exhausted even though she hasn’t done anything all day except sit on the couch and let Aaron look after her. She smiles as she finds him dressed in his pjyamas, rooting through the large linen closet in the corner of their room. 

“Are you remaking the bed?” She asks, rubbing at her eyes with her good hand, “Before you do that can you help me change?” She says, sitting on the edge of the bed, suppressing another yawn, “I’d like to say I can do it myself but we both know I’d struggle and then you’d have to help me anyway.” 

Aaron chuckles and walks over, pressing a kiss to her forehead before he guides her to stand up, reaching for the zipper of the sweater he’d put on over her immobiliser that morning when they left the hospital. He lets it drop to the floor and starts to undo the velcro of the immobiliser so he can take off the clothes underneath. 

“I was looking for that blanket I like,” he explains, careful as he eases her arm down to her side, apologising softly when she winces at the pull in her shoulder, “I thought I’d sleep under it in the spare room so we don’t have to change the bedding in there when I’m done.” 

She looks up at him so sharply, and moves so quickly that pain spreads through her shoulder and down her arm, “Fuck.” 

“Easy, sweetheart,” he says, placing his hand on her shoulder to steady it, to provide support until the pain subsides, “You’re okay.”

She breathes through it until it passes, blinking until her vision is no longer blurry as her breathing slows. She looks up at him, her eyebrows furrowed, “Why…why are you sleeping in the spare room?” 

He sighs and slowly removes his hand from her shoulder before he goes for the hem of her shirt and lets her lift her good arm out of it before he helps her with the injured one. 

“You’re in pain, Em. You have to sleep with that damn thing on,” he says, nodding towards the immobiliser on the bed, “You need the room.” 

She feels a surge of anger she knows he doesn’t deserve that she has to swallow back, taking a moment to blow out a breath so she can react more accordingly, “What I need is my husband sleeping next to me.” 

He sighs, his hands soft and gentle on her bare waist, “Em-”

“No,” she says, firmer this time, “You just spent two months sleeping on the other side of the world. I won’t have you sleeping in the next room when you’re this close. I…” she shakes her head and presses her lips together, “I won’t. You need to sleep in here with me, okay?” 

He stares at her, their eyes locked as he feels himself lose his resolve. He’d never been able to say no to her, not really, and he wasn’t going to start now. Not when it was what he wanted to do too.

“Okay.”

She sighs in relief, “Okay?”

He smiles and nods, leaning in to stamp a kiss against her lips, “Okay.” 

He continues to help her get ready for bed, unhooking her bra and slipping it off before he puts one of his t-shirts over her head. He reaches for the immobiliser but she stops him, her good hand on his arm. 

“Wait,” she says, smiling as she steps a little closer until they are chest to chest, “Hug me.” 

“What? Em-”

“You haven’t hugged me properly since you got back, and I know my shoulder is still fucked up, but I just want you to hug me. No immobiliser, no side hug. Just you and me.” 

He wraps his arms around her, not waiting for her to ask again, and he gently pulls her closer, careful not to hurt her. She wraps her good arm around him and her palm rests on his back as she sinks into him, her face pressed into his chest as he rests his cheek on top of her head. 

“I love you, sweetheart,” he says, stamping a kiss against her hair as he takes the opportunity to hold her this close, something he'd imagined every night since he’d last seen her. 

“I love you too,” she says, kissing his chest through his shirt, her lips catching on what she knew was his thickest scar, “I love you so much.” 

They stand like that, wrapped up in an embrace that isn’t fierce enough for either of them but one that would do for now until he pulls back and cups her cheek, his smile soft. Something just for her and their family. 

“Come on,” he says, “We’ll get this back on you and then I’ll go get you some ice cream before I join you in bed. Jack will be here bright and early.” 

She smiles and nods, already feeling cold when he steps away from her, his warmth something she had been chasing since he left, “He’ll be so excited to see you.” 

“I’m excited to see him too,” he says, smiling as he straps her arm to her chest, “He was surprised when I called him earlier.” 

She hums and runs her fingers through his hair, a wistful smile on her face, “He missed his Daddy. We all did.” 

He wraps his arm around her again and kisses her forehead, his chest aching for all he’d missed, all the things he’s sure he didn’t even know about yet. 

“I missed all of you too.” 

-x-

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[lemoncrushh]

The Entertainer - Track 02 - Looks Like Rain

Summary: Set in the 70s, Sky Jones, a young woman from L.A., meets Harry Styles, an up-and-coming musician and frontman for the band Wildfire. Told in first person from Sky’s point of view, she shares her journey and what it’s like to fall for a rockstar.

STORY PAGE

Track 02 Word Count: 2.5k

“He likes you.”

“He does not.”

“Yes, he does.”

“Likes me. What are we, twelve?”

Halo scoffed. “Then why do you think he keeps coming over with Mitch?”

“For the free beer and pot.”

“Gimme a break, would you? He likes you.”

“He hasn’t even tried to kiss me, Halo!”

“Have you tried to kiss him?”

“No.”

“Why the fuck not?”

I stopped drying off the plate I was holding and gave her a dirty look.

“He sleeps on the couch.”

“So what? Go out there sometime and show him what he’s missing.”

I scowled, threw the dish towel on the counter, and walked out of the kitchen.

“Where are you going?” Halo called. “We’re not done.”

“I am,” I plopped on the sofa and pouted.

“Sky,” Halo said, following me into the living room, “sometimes you have to make the first move if you wanna get laid.”

I looked up at her incredulously.

“Maybe I don’t wanna ‘get laid’,” I mimicked, using air quotes.

“Really? ‘Cause…he’s really fucking cute.”

“I know he is!” I shouted, throwing my head back and covering my face with my hands as I groaned.

“Then what’s the problem?”

I listened to my breathing until it slowed. Then dropping my hands, I opened my eyes and looked at Halo.

“He acts like I’m just one of the guys. We talk about music and all that, and honestly, I really love that, but…I just feel like he thinks of me as a pal.”

Halo glared at me for a minute before rolling her eyes.

“I still think he likes you.”

And with that she turned back to the kitchen to finish the dishes.

For the next two weeks, Harry spent more nights at my place than his own. I blamed it on the fact that Mitch was with Halo and that we’d stay up late and he didn’t feel like going home alone. But part of me wondered if there wasn’t another reason. I did consider Halo’s statement that Harry liked me, but I just couldn’t believe that was true. Not when he hadn’t done much more than lay his head on my shoulder. He did hug me after a show one night, but I chalked that up to joy and adrenaline.

One time when Harry stayed over after a night of beer drinking games, I woke up and had to pee really bad, so I tiptoed out of my room, sneaking a peek in the living room. I watched Harry sleep for a minute or two, admiring his calm face and the beauty of his shut eyelids before making my way to the bathroom. On my way back though, he stirred and rolled onto his side.

“Hi,” I heard him say, or at least I thought he did. I wondered if I’d imagined it when I whispered “hi” back, but got no other response, so I simply returned to my room and closed the door behind me.

The next Friday night, Wildfire was playing at The Troubadour. It was a big deal. Word had it that their demo was making the rounds and several record executives, producers and managers would be attending. Halo and I took on the job as honorary band promoters, which basically meant we were cheerleaders. It wasn’t hard to do. The band was on fire that night. I mean, they really lived up to their name.

I stood at the front, next to the stage, singing along to all the words since I knew them already. I caught Harry smiling at me a few times, which only made me all the more excited.

After the show, I followed Halo backstage where she was in Mitch’s lap within two seconds, even though he hadn’t even bothered to remove his sweaty shirt yet. I leaned against the wall trying my best not to watch them neck when I heard someone give a wolf howl behind me. Harry appeared with his arms held high, a beer in each hand.

“Rock and Roll!” he cheered. The rest of the band hollered.

“This is fuckin’ it, man!” exclaimed Lee. “That was the best show we’ve ever done! And at the fuckin’ Troubadour, man!”

The band continued to whoop and howl until Harry finally noticed me standing there, looking like a strange little wallflower with a crooked smile.

“Here you go, darlin’,” he held a beer out to me. “Let’s have a toast. To music. To this fuckin’…AMAZING BAND!”

Everyone cheered again and we clinked beer bottles, guzzling it down as fast as we could.

“Party at your place?” Harry raised a brow, pointing at me.

“Wh-well…I…”

“Yeah, let’s go!” squealed Halo, her arm around Mitch’s neck.

The rest of the crew followed them out of the dressing room, leaving me and Harry.

“I don’t think we have any more beer,” I commented.

Harry chuckled. “No worries, love. We’ll think of something.”

The party was in full swing before Harry even arrived. The band had to tear down and pack up their gear, so Halo and I stopped at the store and bought a few things. We didn’t really need to though. By the time we got home, a keg was being delivered. The rest of the band soon followed, but no Harry.

“He was talking to some guy when we left,” explained Lee. “He told us to go ahead, he’ll be along shortly.”

Shortly, however, turned into over an hour later. There was a loud bang at the door, and I rushed to open it, afraid it was a neighbor complaining about the noise, or worse, the cops. But it was Harry. He almost fell into me, his body swaying like a swinging door loose on its hinges.

“Hey!” he greeted with bloodshot eyes, his hand still on the door frame.

“Hey yourself,” I muttered, nearly catching him before I shut the door. He was clearly drunk. “How did you get here?”

“Don’t remember. Oh yeah. S’mebody gave me a ride.”

“And something else apparently.”

Harry held up a finger like he was going to protest, or at least explain himself, but then quickly dropped his hand. “Yeah.” Then he saw the display of liquor on the counter. “Oh hey, let’s do shots!”

“Um, Harry, I think maybe we should go this way. I can fix you some coffee. Or tea.”

Harry yanked his arm from my grasp and gave me a dirty look. I’d never seen him look at me that way before. It scared me.

“I said I want shots.” He walked around me toward the other side of the counter and began to pour brown liquor into a glass.

“But…don’t you think…”

Harry whirled around, stopping me in my tracks.

“Y’don’t fuckin’ own me! Alright? Y’don’t get to tell me what t’do!”

“O-okay.”

I couldn’t breathe for the lump in my throat as I watched Harry drink another shot, the alcohol not even affecting him. Then he grabbed the entire bottle and crossed the room. My chest felt like it was closing in, and I needed some fresh air. I made my way to the patio, shutting the sliding glass door behind me.

I took a few deep, much needed breaths as I stared out into the early morning sky. It wasn’t quite dawn yet, but the clouds told me there was most likely rain coming. Very fitting, because I felt like a big storm was brewing already.

I heard a burst of loud music and turned around suddenly to see Harry stepping onto the patio. He said nothing, merely glared at me, the sound of “Purple Haze” being muffled as he closed the sliding door. I stared at him as he stepped closer, gripping the handrail next to me. He swayed back and forth, and for a moment I wasn’t sure if he wasn’t going to try to jump over, throw up, or both.

“You okay?” I finally asked, my concern never faltering.

“Fine. Just needed some air.”

“Me too.”

We were both quiet until I took another deep breath.

“I like when the sky’s like this,” I commented.

“It’s grey,” said Harry sharply. “Looks like rain.”

“I know. That’s why I like it. It’s like my name.”

“I didn’t think that was your real name.”

I could detect the tone in his voice and knew without looking at him that he was not being curious, but rather mocking me. I played it cool.

“It’s not my birth name, no. But I think it fits me better than any other name I could’ve been given, don’t you? It’s because of my eyes,” I explained, turning to face him. I urged him to look at me…hoping he’d notice and give me one of his smiles that I liked so much. “The color of them. They’re like a cloudy sky just before the rain.”

Harry scoffed and shook his head. “Some lad you fancied told you that?”

I froze in my spot, simultaneously wanting to punch him and cry and run away. Why was he being so mean?

“No,” I replied, my bottom lip trembling. “Halo came up with it. I thought it sounded pretty.”

Harry rolled his eyes and turned to go inside.

I think if the door hadn’t opened a few minutes later, I would have eventually started crying. But I’d been trying to hold myself together, willing myself not to let some stupid guy get to me. Not some dumb musician who’d been sleeping on my couch and drinking all my beer. I wiped my eyes of the nonexistent tears and turned around.

“Oh, you scared me!” I exclaimed when I noticed it was Halo.

“Sorry. What are you doing out here?” She joined me at the railing, pretending like she was watching the clouds with me, but I knew better.

“Please don’t say I’m a hypocrite, Halo.”

“What do you mean?”

“I can’t be in there with him.”

“Who? Harry?”

I nodded. “He took something, I think. Before he showed up. He’s acting…different.”

“Really? What do you think he’s on?”

“I don’t know. But I don’t like him like that.”

Halo turned around, leaning her back against the railing. “Why would I think you’re a hypocrite?”

I side-eyed her.

“We smoke pot, Sky,” she rolled her eyes. “That’s not the same thing.”

“Isn’t it?”

“No. And we’ve done ‘shrooms a few times. It’s no big deal. Cocaine isn’t even a big deal anymore.”

“I don’t think he’s high on coke,” I declared. “He’s…kinda mean. I offered to make him some coffee and he told me I don’t own him.”

“So he’s being a dick tonight,” shrugged Halo. “He’s probably just high on adrenaline and being cocky.”

“No…it’s not that.”

Halo sighed, pressing her lips together.

“I don’t think Harry does hard drugs, Sky.”

I furrowed my brows. “How do you know?”

“I just do. Something Mitch told me.”

“Halo!”

She sighed again. “Okay. I gotta tell you something, but swear you won’t tell Harry I told you.”

“What is it?”

“Swear?”

“Okay, I swear!”

“Harry’s best friend, Simon, was Wildfire’s original lead guitarist. He died a year and a half ago. He overdosed on heroin.”

I dropped my jaw, speechless.

“Mitch said Harry took it hard, wouldn’t talk to anybody for nearly a month. He said he never did anything as hard as heroin, but he’s sworn off all hard drugs. Music’s most important to him, so he doesn’t feel like he needs that, you know?”

“Then why?” I wondered aloud. “Why is he acting like he is?”

“Maybe he’s just really drunk. Maybe some record exec bought him some drinks after we left and he’s toasted. Just…try not to take it personally, alright? He’ll sleep it off on our sofa and be the same ol’ Harry again tomorrow.”

I blinked hard, trying my best to understand and agree with her. She patted me on the arm and stood up straight.

“I’m going back inside, okay? Do you need anything?”

“No. I’m just gonna hang out here for a few more minutes.”

Halo gave me a tight, understanding smile and returned to the party. I sighed. Maybe she was right. It was nearly sunup and Harry would probably be crashed on my couch soon enough.

Deciding to rejoin the party myself, I opened the door and was hit with the smell of marijuana. It was a scent I knew all too well, and I found my tension easing up already. Most of the rest of the party was sitting in a circle in the middle of the room, a joint being passed around. Harry sat in a chair, his eyes heavy yet focused on something straight ahead - me. He looked like Jim Morrison sitting there, his arms slung over the arms of the chair, his hair falling around his face, framing it like some rock god. The radio played Gary Glitter and for a moment I was trapped in a fantasy in my head.

“We’ve been here too long tryin’ to get along Pretending that you’re oh so shy I’m a natural man doin’ all I can My temperature is runnin’ high”

“Hey mate,” I heard Deacon say. “You want another hit?”

“No,” replied Harry, his eyes still on me. Then he lifted his hand and pointed. “I want her.”

What? My eyes about popped out of my head as I felt everyone else’s eyes on me. A smirk grew on Harry’s mouth as he turned his hand over and beckoned me with his finger.

“Do you wanna touch (yeah!) Do you wanna touch (yeah!) Do you wanna touch me there”

No! I mean…yeah…I mean…

I shook my head, my hair falling over my eyes as I ran for my bedroom and slammed the door. I fell face down on my bed, Gary Glitter’s (and probably Harry’s) question ringing in my ears. And although I knew in truth that they weren’t, I could swear I heard the sound of everyone laughing at me.

I dozed in and out of sleep for the next couple of hours. I heard the front door closing a few times, people saying their goodbyes. I heard Halo knocking on my door.

“Sky? Sky! Please come out. Everyone’s leaving. Don’t you wanna say goodbye?”

“Sky! Please. If you’re not coming out, then let me in.”

“Okay, fine. Harry’s sorry. He says he’ll talk to you tomorrow.”

“Sky? Are you asleep?”

I finally opened the door around seven in the morning to go to the bathroom. The inevitable rain had come and was pelting against the window and the glass door to the patio. Harry was sprawled out on the sofa, his bare feet hanging over the side as usual. And as usual, he looked peaceful. I took a detour to the kitchen and brought back a glass of water and a bottle of aspirin, leaving them on the coffee table.

When I awoke the next afternoon, Harry was gone, but he’d left me a note. At the top, he’d drawn three scribbly rain clouds.

Sky ~

I’m sorry. That wasn’t me. I’ll explain tomorrow.

H x

Songs mentioned:

Jimi Hendrix - Purple Haze

Gary Glitter - Do You Wanna Touch Me (Oh Yeah!)

Hope you enjoyed! Feedback is love x.

[fangymutt]

i am. a little sad :c can you tell me a good thing that happened?

Firstly im sending you a big hug if youll have it and I hope you know that tomorrows always a new day new chances and that im rooting for u!

But the other day i stayed up all night bc lifes been tough but we were playing minecraft! just my wife and some pals and it was awesome and after everyone went to bed we wanted to stay up so i cozy gamed with the wife and we had to go to the dispensary because i was out of weed that i use for eating/chron pain and it was getting tough to move w/o so we hopped in my car to go. I got there right at opening and there was a line to get in which was a first! so i got in line and noticed everyone was so friendly i was masked and quiet and everyone just idly chit-chatted and shuffled in to the waiting areas.

Thtats when the most beautiful thing started happening, the music was on some smooth psych groove rock and eveyone just kinda started chatting and soon we all were chatting! I was even getting gendered correct! someone complimented my mask, we laughed and told jokes about getting to high on accident or what not and mind you the age ranges here were like from 20's to 70's and we all were just sharing in laughtrer and joy and funny stories and then one guy announced he had been clean for 4 years that day from opiates and we all congratulated him and cheered and it was so amazing. and as people shuffled in for their meds we all shared good byes and well wishes and the original group that started there soon clustered together as we all laugh a lil more and i finally went in after the one woman sat with me and cracked jokes abt the funny guitar sounds and i told her "put some stink on it!" and she cackled and loved it and it was so pure and human and social. i said my goodbyes got my meds and the one lady was chatting to the man at my register who was cashier and she said goodbye and my cashier told her "hold on let me come give you a hug please you are amazing" and she yelled in elation going "HOWD U KNOW I NEEDED A HUG TODAY I REALLY DID" and my heart soared because all these people all these walks of life all sharing in love and joy and compassion and triumph and hardhsip and none of us knew eachother one bit.

The world is good, its really hard but its made with real good amazing people and we are all so full of love and can come back from anything because thats what makes ppl so great. People are the greatest thing to happen and i mean that

I drove home with my wife laughing and being silly and the sun was shining the sky was blue. it was 32 degrees, it was on the highway and for even only a couple of hours we got reminded of Love in all its places/

[garbinge]

Complicated

Javier Peña & Pena!Sister!Reader (Peña's Sister Reader) Steve Murphy x Peña!F!Reader

For @the-slumberparty's Bingo Challenge! Bingo square: Bondage

A/N: Okay, I KNOWWWW bondage is smutty. I know. but like I had to make it angsty because its who i am as a person. it does allude to smut tho, so it's not completely dry lol.

Word Count: 2.2k

Warnings: Angsty, alludes to sexual situations, flirty, fighting, arguing, cursing, mentions of guns, etc. bondage.

Narcos Taglist: @drabbles-mc @justreblogginfics @narcolini

“It’s too fucking complicated!” Javi’s voice raised. 

“Don’t raise your voice.” You scrunched your face up and waved him off. 

“Don’t make that face.” He retorted back to you in the most little brother way possible. 

“Look, it’s done, Javi. I’m flying out and getting briefed before you even have your flight booked. I’m on the Escobar case, it’s done.” You shrugged, face still scrunched up as you waved him off yet again, grabbing the plates to serve the food you had just cooked.

“Don’t–don’t do that. I fucking hate when you do that.” His voice was lowered but it was still tense. 

“Do what? Be right?” You weren’t going to yell, you weren’t going to argue, what’s done was done. 

Javi was coming around to that realization, begrudgingly, but he was. “Yea, that.” 

You smiled at your brother, not in a condescending way, but sympathetic. You didn’t want Javi to be upset or bothered by this but he also needed to accept it regardless of his opinion on it. 

You and Javi both joined government agencies, at the time of joining you were both in different divisions, but there was occasional overlap. It taught you two how to work together, how to communicate on the job, all of those things. But nothing prepared both of you for this. There had been rumors that Peña had been selected to join the DEA, you just didn’t realize that the rumor meant both of you. It was definitely a conflict of interest, but the DEA definitely didn’t care. Their priority was catching Escobar. 

“Is the food done?” Javi was walking over hiding his attempt to steal from the pot by seeming like he was going to help you serve and set the table. 

“Are both of you done?” Chucho entered the kitchen, frustration laced in his voice and eager to eat. 

“Yes Dad.” You handed him the first plate of food you were serving and he was out of the kitchen as quickly as he entered, not wanting anything to do with whatever you and your brother were talking about. 

Javi’s eyes were on Chucho until he left the room and he leaned back as extra precaution to check he was gone. As soon as he was out of sight, Javi was turning to you. 

“Hermanita, por favor.” He pled with you, like nicknames were going to make you be like ‘okay I’ll drop the opportunity of a lifetime and fuck my career’. Extremely wishful thinking. 

“Javi, I told Dad we were done, so it’s done.” You were aggravated now. “If you have a problem with it, you stay home.” You were grabbing the carrot out of his hand and throwing it into the pot of food, annoyance all over your face. 

You know your little brother didn’t mean what you were feeling. The feeling of being a woman working for the government in the 70’s was trying to say the least. And your brother was trying you right now. Of course he’d assume you’d just be the one to stand down, you knew in Javi’s mind it was more a selfish thing than a sexist one, but that didn’t take away from the underlying misogynistic assumption of why he probably was thinking it in the first place. So you made it clear to him that the only way he’d get what he want, was for him to make the choice to stay home, not you.

“Alright.” He lifted his hands up in surrender, knowing you well enough that there was no more room to push or argue about this topic. But, Javi being Javi, that didn’t stop him from repeating himself from something he said earlier. This time under his breath as you walked away to join Chucho to eat.

“It’s gonna be too fucking complicated.” 

____

“This is fucking complicated.” Those were the first words you spoke when Steve opened the door to his apartment. 

“Apparently that’s our favorite thing to do.” Steve stepped back and waved his arm in a sarcastic manner to welcome you in but you were already well past him and pacing in his living room thinking about the information he had just told you.  

That was true. As if being in the thick of this drug war in Colombia wasn’t complicated enough, you had working alongside your brother to add to it and decided sleeping with his partner was just the complicated cherry on top you needed. 

To be fair, you weren’t just sleeping with Steve, there were feelings there, feelings neither of you ever talked about because being a special agent in the DEA meant you were sent back to the 5th grade when it came to being open and honest about how you felt about people. Also, you were truly in the thick of things, how you felt about each other wasn’t ever top priority. You both met the first day you landed, he had been in Colombia for about a week. He acted like he was showing you the lay of the land there at the embassy, but truthfully, you both were ostracized from the masses. You both needed to earn your way to be trusted by your fellow co-workers and the search bloc. It made getting closer with each other easier because, well, when no one else would talk to you, you had one another. Living in the same building also helped, it’d make late nights feel a bit more romanticized when he’d walk you to your apartment on the third floor and then walk back down to his on the second. He’d do that every night, until one night, he didn’t walk back down to the second floor. Not until the morning to grab his clothes for your morning trek into the office. Since then, the lines got extremely blurry in your professional relationship and when Javi came things got even more complicated. Steve was never your working partner, per say. You might have gone out on raids and things together, but on paper you were just two DEA agents in the same department. You were more of an intel special agent, while he was a boots on the ground type. But you both gave eachother tips and tricks to both. Until Javi came. Once your brother was in Colombia, he was assigned as Steve’s partner. 

“Are you positive?” You stopped pacing and stared at Steve, the coffee table being the only thing between you, that and a mountain of tension. 

“He sold me out to the fuckin’ Cali cartel, he’s blurring the lines.” 

“Yea, well.” Your face said it all when you looked at Steve. You two were doing the same thing Javi was just different scenarios. 

“It’s way different. This isn’t illegal.” Steve defended both of you. 

You brought your hand to your head as the headache began to throb. This wasn’t the time to argue about your relationship, it was different sure, but there was a level of issue with it. Things you thought of more since you’d likely be the one to be taunted, hazed, bullied, and reprimanded work wise. 

Your thoughts were interrupted by the ring of his landline phone. Both of you twisting your heads to stare at the phone before Steve was moving to answer. You resumed your pacing, hoping the call was something nonsensical and you two could get back to your conversation

“I gotta go in. Classified info from the embassy came in, they found out where Blackie’s girlfriend is.” Steve was quick to grab his keys and vest, which meant a raid was approved. 

“I’m coming with you.” You went to turn to run to your apartment and grab your vest but Steve was jogging by you quickly. 

You weren’t expecting him to stand in front of the door and block it like he was doing so the frown on your face grew as you tried to piece together what he was doing. 

“Please stay here.” That was all he was going to say, and even thought he knew that wasn’t going to do anything in your brain, he still held on some hope. 

You laughed at his request. “No, I’m going with you. This is huge.” 

“If Javi is working with the Cali Cartel, with fuckin’ Los Pepes, whoever, this is going to get messy.” Steve gave you the real reason he wanted you to stay back. 

“Steve. Right now, I’m not your fuck buddy, I’m not Javi’s sister, I’m not your responsibility or his, I’m not even your fucking partner, I’m a DEA special agent and I have every right to be on this raid.” You were firm with your voice. 

“You know that’s not why I’m saying this.” Steve tilted his head. He knew how you felt about things inside the agency, the politics of it all. He might have been oblivious to somethings but he was fully aware of others. “I’m saying this because if Javi gets put into a position in the middle of the field, all those agents and search bloc members around, you can’t react the way I know you’ll want to, I can though, he’s my partner.” Steve made a good point, but you weren’t going to give in that easily, or at all. 

“I know how to work in the field with my fuckin’ brother, Murphy.” You were now chest to chest, you had been taking steps closer to the door. 

“But you don’t know how to navigate working on the field with your brother whose possibly–probably working with fuckin Los Pepes.” 

There was his point. He was probably right, even though you didn’t want him to be. You just stared at him, letting the long seconds pass knowing he’d give in because the time was ticking down to him getting to wherever this intel pointed to. 

“Fine.” He said hanging his head low. “But you left your vest here.” He knew that was where you were headed. The memory came back to you, last night coming into Steve’s apartment quickly and quietly after a long night on the streets of Colombia based on a rotten tip. 

Turning to follow Steve’s gaze you saw him pull your bulletproof vest from the coat hooks and lift it up with one finger. It was sarcastic but a part of you couldn’t help but to feel slightly attracted by the face he made at you. With his other hand he grabbed his other things, gun, wallet, handcuffs, and situated them on his belt and threw the vest over his shoulder before coming back over to you. 

He ripped the velcro off the vest and opened it wide, the sound of the velcro detaching loudly filling the close space between you two. Lifting the green bulletproof vest over your head he stepped closer against you, his torso lining up with your own. You could feel his breath against your face, it was cool with the hint of a cigarette he probably had a few hours ago. His other hand lifted your arms up. If you weren’t getting ready to go on a raid you would have pushed him down and taken him right here. As he placed the vest over your arms, he aggressively pulled it down so it was starting to form against your body, the motion of it was making your heart beat faster. His head now was level with yours as his hands caressed around you and you let out a gasp as he tightened the straps so not only was the vest fit around your body but you were brought closer to him. 

He lifted your hands up again, putting both of your wrists in one of his hands and tapping around the vest to make sure everything was secure. 

“Want you to be safe, you know?” He chuckled, knowing exactly what he was doing. He spoke this to you, whispered it actually, right into your ear, his lips tickling your ear before he placed a sweet kiss on your neck that soon became sensual. You didn’t realized it since your eyes closed to enjoy his lips on your neck but you were now against the wall. 

Just as you were about to tell him that you both should go, you heard the clicking and your eyes shot open and looked up. You were handcuffed to the lighting sconce that was attached to the concrete wall. You shook your hand for good measure but there was no coming loose from that. 

“Are you fucking kidding me?” You looked at Steve, shock and a little betrayal in your eyes. 

“Not exactly the kind of bondage I wanted to try with you but I had to do it,” He was turning to grab the sat phone that was on the coffee table before turning back around to see you and how angry you were. “I’m sorry, I’ll make it up to you and call you the minute it’s over.” He was placing the SAT phone in your hand before placing a quick kiss on your lips and running out of the door. 

There was nothing you could do but yell, so that’s what you did. 

“FUCK YOU, MURPHY!”

[thislovintime]

Some more Ask Peter Tork selections...

"Hello Peter, OK, it's hard to actually type anything here, because it is hard to believe this could be you. Remember me, the crazy lady in the 4th row at the concert in NJ, in the 80's holding a big sign that read, ‘I LOVE PETER.’ Of course you couldn't have noticed with that huge crowd, but I do want to say; thanks for the FUN! My question to you now is, about today's young people, and their strong dependence on their parents. I've seen other people my age (54) going through the same thing, and wonder if our peace, rock & roll, drugs, drinking, and party days, have contributed to their actions and behaviors now. My 25 year old son still lives home; he has things like, a TV, cell phone, guitar, drums, and some other smaller instruments. He over the years, had thoughts of being a rock star, had and has, drug, and depression issues. And like many other young men, loves beer, concerts, parties, clothing, girls, and sports; all just the same. There is no real motivation for much else, hence the still living at home. At least after the 60's/70's hullabaloos, our generation eventually went to work, moved out, and learned to be independent. Unless maybe today, things (even music) are just so expensive, it seems un-comprehensible. Are we as parents giving up, giving material items, and giving in, not wanting to be the same as our own parents? Are we way too cool to be more aggressive in how we talk to them? Are we still living our own "Hippie" care free life through them? Also, have you yourself ever actually witnessed what I'm talking about? Oh yeah, one more thing, is it easier for some parents to be able to kick them out 'For their own good,' than other parents? Yours Truly, Shell New Jersey"

"Dear Shell, I remember you well. You were awfully cute there in the 4th row. But on to important matters. First of all, I'm pretty sure there is no blanket statement about your question that would cover the situation. For instance, of course some parents find it easier to kick out their kids than others. That's just natural. But as to the general average of kids today staying more with their parents than in days of yore, well, I partly blame those who let the economy go to hell in a hand basket...or perhaps actively took it there is a better description. It's tougher now than it used to be to find a job, and there is less of a spirit that finding one will give one a real chance to come up in the world. It's therefore understandable that 25-year-olds and some even well older would be discouraged, and have very little incentive to go forth and make their way. Still, I am pretty sure that wanting to work rather than lay about is a preference in human nature, as long as no major roadblocks stand in the way. As to whether it was our hippie lifestyle that led us to treat our kids in ways that made them lazy, well, I wouldn't know for sure. But I do know that every generation is formed by the previous generation's reactions to their parents' generation, etc., etc., since time immemorial. We did the best we could with what we had, and if we don't like what we see, I'm not sure we can do much for the next generation anymore. I believe that my kids appreciate that I am still working on my own life, and that gives them encouragement not to give up, whatever else they may think of me. I don't have much to say about the way they live their lives. Of course, they aren't encamped in my basement, either. Meanwhile, I counsel patience and love, of course. Best of luck, Peter" - Ask Peter Tork, July 2010

"Dear Peter, My name is Mary and I’m in tenth grade. I’ve been struggling recently because all of my friends and teachers think that I should have a 'direction' to my life. They tell me that I need to have my future planned out right now. What college am I going to? What career field will I try to get into? I don’t know how to answer any of their questions. Should I know what I want to do with my life even though I’m only fifteen? Thank you, Mary C."

"Dear Mary, 'Should'? I don’t know from should anymore. I once heard someone say 'Don’t "should" on yourself.' I eventually worked it out to where the word 'should' requires the phrase 'in order to.' You 'should' turn left here 'in order to' get to the grocery store. Like that. So, the question becomes, 'in order to'… what? Check out the letter and answer beforehand. Do you know what you want to be when you grow up? No? Well, perhaps a little investigation is in order. When you were little, what did you dream of becoming? Airline pilot? Doctor, nurse, veterinarian or horse trainer? Wonder Woman? Rock star? Newspaper reporter? Or did you imagine that a life of marriage and kids plus a bit of a trade as, say, a hair stylist was heaven on earth? Go back to your early daydreams and see whether any of them still holds a charge. Be careful here: if you don’t know instantly what your dreams were, then it’s possible that you were discouraged from holding on to them. If that’s true, then that discouragement will get in the way of your trying to access those dreams now. Be extremely gentle with yourself, even to the point of sickeningly coddling yourself (for a little while anyway, heheheh). If your childhood dream comes to the fore, you will have all you need to decide whether and where to go to college, or whatever else you may need. One note: it’s wonderful to decide to, say, become a musician, but if “famous musician” is your goal, you may be in for more trouble than you want. If you pursue your dream for what it gives you and let it take you where it will, you will have a pretty cool life almost no matter what. I’m really sure about this. Get back to me if it’s not working out. Best of luck, Peter" - Ask Peter Tork, July 2010

[sashaisready]

The Blood Pact: Chapter 7 - No going back

Bucky Barnes Vampire AU x Female Reader

Reeling from a bad break-up, you're desperately trying to find a new place to live but the Brooklyn rental market is a complete nightmare. You take a chance on an intriguing newspaper ad and enquire about a room in a shared house, where you'd be living with two mysterious men. The catch is that they want something other than your money for you to pay the rent...the one thing they don't have

Series Masterlist

Chapter 8

Hi all. Bit of a shorter chapter as we build up to their Big Night. Warnings for beginnings of smut, talk of blood drinking and reader being a bit over eager with Bucky (but he's very willing).

You were a jittery mess the next day as you waited for sundown. The hangover didn’t help much, either. Part of you even wondered if you’d dreamt it all, and Bucky would come down those stairs as he did every night and everything would be as it was. Awkward and uncomfortable. But you remembered his hands on you too clearly, the feel of his tongue against your neck, the breathlessness from that kiss…all too real to have been a dream.

You distracted yourself with housework and a catch up video call with Wanda and Nat, filling them in on Peter’s dastardly deeds as they scoffed and shouted – outraged on your behalf. You were still annoyed at yourself for your moment of weakness, but Nat vowed to avenge you and it felt good to be talking about it and laughing, reminding yourself that it was only the important people in your life who mattered.

You did a couple of loads of laundry and took a long leisurely bath. You wanted to look nice for Bucky but didn’t want to look too dressed up as you normally wore casual shorts or loungewear around the house, so one of your sexy cocktail dresses would certainly raise an eyebrow from Steve. You settled on a tight leggings and tank top set you knew emphasised every curve of your body, popping on a bit of minimal make up for good measure.

You had ordered your favourite takeout as your capacity to cook was non-existent. You were sat at the kitchen table eating when they finally descended the stairs and came into the kitchen. You looked up and greeted them as naturally as you could, trying to ignore your heart as it hammered in your chest.

Steve was dressed up and ready to go in a crisp white shirt and navy tailored pants, while Bucky was more laidback in dark jeans and a fitted grey t-shirt. The two of you exchanged the briefest of heated glances before you turned away and asked Steve if he was looking forward to his night out.

“I am, yeah. Haven’t seen this crowd in a while so it’ll be good to catch up” he beamed.

“Fun!” you responded cheerily. “What’s a vampire gathering like? Do you have a human sacrifice? Drink the finest AB negative from martini glasses?”

Steve laughed heartily. “Not since the 70s. We normally just hang out and catch up, put on some music. But yes, they do offer refreshments so you’re off the hook tonight”

You smiled back. “Sounds like a blast. Say hi to Blade for me”.

You laughed together for a moment before Steve’s expression turned into something more serious.

"Are you two going to be okay together without me?” he asked, looking between you and Bucky. “I’m a little worried I’ll come home and one of you will be torn limb from limb – and I mean it, both of you have a fair shot of being capable of that”.

You both turned to look at Bucky who was standing at the kitchen counter, reading through some mail. He glanced back at you briefly before turning to Steve.

“We’ll be fine” he replied solemnly as his azure eyes locked with yours once more, giving nothing away. “Won’t we?”

You nodded. “Yep…I’m still kinda hungover so I’m probably gonna watch a movie and call it a night. We’ll just stay out of each other’s way”.

Bucky nodded back as Steve eyed you both. You could see he wasn’t wholly convinced, worried about what the two of you might get up to in his absence.

If only he knew.

Steve eventually got to his feet, satisfied that he could trust you both not to kill each other at least until he got home. Or as satisfied as he’d ever be, at least.

“Okay, good. Well I’ll get on my way, then. Just call me if World War III breaks out”.

He headed to the door as Bucky walked with him, they were chatting about some old buddy of theirs, Rumlow something? So you tuned it out. You picked up your empty plate and took it to the sink, throwing away the takeout containers and turning the faucet to rinse. You were suddenly nauseous as you knew it was only a matter of moments before you and Bucky were alone, mindlessly scrubbing the plate as you felt your nerves take over.

You finally heard Steve say goodbye as the front door closed, and then silence from Bucky in the hall. You swallowed, wondering if you should make the first move or wait until he said something. Or maybe he’d changed his mind and was just going to ignore the whole thing. You rubbed at the plate a little harder, even though it was already clean.

You didn’t have to wait much longer as you suddenly felt strong arms from behind loop across your waist. You yelped and dropped the plate in surprise, you hadn’t even heard him enter the kitchen. He pulled you tight against him as his lips found your neck, sucking softly on your skin as he worked from behind your ear and down to your collarbone. You closed your eyes and let yourself sag against him as you leaned into the kisses, your hands gripping his. You whimpered quietly as you allowed him to sweep you away. He stopped kissing and you could feel his grin against the back of your neck.

His hands sharply flipped you so that you were facing him and you were immediately lost in his eyes as he pulled you against him, gently moving a strand of hair from your face as he studied you. You were painfully aware of how easily he could manoeuvre you without even breaking a sweat. It shot a burst of electricity straight through you.

“We need to talk-” he started, his voice firm and authoritative, but you didn’t let him finish.

You flung your arms around his neck, desperately pulling his face towards yours. You felt like you’d collapse if you didn’t kiss him in the next few seconds. You pushed your mouth onto his and despite his insistence on talking he didn’t resist as he kissed you back. You vaulted up into his arms, wrapping your legs tightly around his waist as he lifted you, staggering across the kitchen as you both blindly bumped into the counter and the table. He finally pinned you against the wall, your back flush with the cool plaster as he broke away and forced you to look him in the eye.

“I’m serious, Doll. It’s important that-”

But you gave him no leeway, diving back onto him as you greedily found his lips once more.

“Later…later. Please…” you mumbled into his mouth as your hands frantically ran up his shoulders. You were so desperate to have him that you couldn’t wait a moment longer. And maybe part of you worried he’d talk himself out of it.

But he broke away again and you sighed with frustration as he pointed a stern finger in your face, the other arm keeping you upright.

“Stop that” he chided.

You tried to move to him again but he caught your face in his hand, squeezing your cheeks in his fingers so that you looked like a caught fish. You sighed, admitting defeat and prying his hand off of you, pressing yourself against the wall as you waited for him to talk.

“That’s better” he smirked triumphantly before becoming serious again. “Okay. If we’re gonna do this, there’s no going back. You understand?”

You nodded obediently.

“It’s going to be intense. You get that foggy feeling when I feed from you? I feel a version of it too. That means we have a strong connection. It’s sort of like a bond. It happens sometimes with certain pairings of vampires and humans. Nobody really knows why, we just know it intensifies even further if that pairing have sex. So I need you to know this all going in, because it might feel overwhelming at times, alright?”

You nodded again, both exhilarated and slightly nervous. Also it felt validating to know you weren’t just a horny mess and there was something there.

“But I’ll be here with you alright? And we can slow down or even stop if it gets too much. You just need to communicate with me”.

“Okay. I can do that” you respond shyly.

He watches your face for a moment, seemingly checking that you understand everything he’s told you. After he seems satisfied, his gaze changes to something darker as his eyes scan you up and down. He’s still holding you against the wall, your legs squirm slightly around his waist. You realise the position he has you in leaves you quite…vulnerable.

“You’re wearing that to get me going, aren’t you?” he whispers, roughly pawing at your tight leggings.

You feel moisture pooling between your legs as you stare back at him defiantly.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about”.

He laughs. “Oh, really?” A finger slowly traces from your collarbone down across the curve of your breast and down to your stomach. Your breath hitches and your eyes widen as your skin goosebumps under his touch but you manage to keep your composure. Mostly.

“So it’s just a coincidence that tonight of all nights you’re wearing something that means I can see almost every part of you?” he asks, his face inquisitive.

“I just like to be comfortable at home” you reply breezily.

He grins, his finger still exploring your torso.

“There’s something I want to ask you…” he says softly as his finger moves from your stomach down to the apex of your thighs. You flinch, your body freezing as he hovers over your crotch.

“Mm?” you respond, unable to tear your eyes away from the precarious position his hand hovers in.

You gasp slightly as he begins circling your clothed core, the tight material means the sensation is especially heightened and your arms shoot up to grab his shoulders for support. You cling to him and he smirks as he presses his forehead against yours and continues to work you over. You begin to whimper softly and bite down on your bottom lip as the sensation leaves you breathless. You can already feel the beginnings of a climax and he’s barely started.

“I wanted to ask…” he continues as you subconsciously wriggle against his hand. His voice is softer than you’d ever heard it, velvety. You can practically feel the arousal radiating from him and it surges your ego like nothing else.

 “…I’d like to feed before we really get started. But from your neck, this time”.

You pull back and look at him, finally distracted from his touch.

“My…neck?” you ask hesitantly, your fingers move up to stroke over where your jugular is.

He nods. Removing his hand for a moment and delicately kissing your neck instead. You sigh as his lips ghost over your skin, closing your eyes as you lean into the tingling feeling.

“Yes, right here” he whispers as his tongue takes a cautious swipe over your nape. He groans slightly as he leans back into the kisses. “Like Steve said that first night we met, it’s a very intimate area to feed from. But if you agree…I really think it’ll enhance the experience…for both of us”.

He sucks on a patch of skin and you shudder with pleasure as he nips at you gently with his fangs, your fingers dig hard into his shoulder blades.

“…Okay” you manage to utter breathlessly.

He pulls back and grins fiendishly at you, fangs bared and smile wide. You’ve never felt more like prey than in this moment. That man will swallow you whole if given the chance.

“Okay” he nods. “Let’s go…”.

He pulls you away from the wall and throws you over his shoulder in a fireman’s carry, you shriek with excitement as he heads to the stairs.

[reasonablerodents]

Have you ever wanted 70 angst-laden prompts? Well, here you go, and they’re all lyrics by The Smiths, the masters of the subject. (Yeah I could have done way more but I thought 70 was probably more than enough)

They’re sorted into several catagories: Loneliness, Breakups, Longing, Love, Questions, Cruelty and Corruption, Statements, Struggling, and Sex. I also included the song names so even if you don’t know the song, you can look it up.

However, the categories are just a guide- use them however you want! Have fun!

LONELINESS

The Queen Is Dead

-Life is very long when you’re lonely.

Never Had No One Ever

-Now I’m outside your house, I’m alone.

I Know It’s Over

-If you’re so very clever, then why are you on your own tonight?

Rushholme Ruffians

-I might walk home alone/But my faith in love is still devout.

Asleep

-Sing me to sleep/I don’t want to wake up on my own anymore.

* * * * * * * * * *

BREAKUPS

I Know It’s Over

-I know it’s over, still I cling. I don’t know where else I can go.

Unhappy Birthday

-From the one you left behind.

Jeane

-We tried, and we failed.

Miserable Lie

-There’s something against us/It’s not time.

You’ve Got Everything Now

-You’ve got everything now, and what a terrible mess I’ve made of my life.

Still Ill

-Although I ended up with sore lips/It just wasn’t like the old days any more.

Stop Me If You Think You’ve Heard This One Before

-I still love you/Only slightly less than I used to

A Rush And A Push And The Land Is Ours

-Oh, but don’t mention love, I’d hate the pain of the strain all over again.

* * * * * * * * * *

LONGING

Some Girls Are Bigger Than Others

-Send me your pillow, the one that you dream on

Reel Around The Fountain

-I dreamt about you last night and I fell out of bed twice.

Please, Please, Please Let Me Get What I Want

-So for once in my life/Let me get what I want/Lord knows, it would be the first time.

I Want The One I Can’t Have

-I want the one that I can’t have/And it’s driving me mad.

Well I Wonder

-Well I wonder, do you hear me when you sleep?/I hoarsely cry.

-Well I wonder, do you see me when we pass?/I half-die/Please keep me in mind.

How Soon Is Now?

-See, I’ve already waited too long/And now my hope is gone.

Half A Person

-Call me morbid, call me pale/I’ve spent six years on your trail.

* * * * * * * * * *

LOVE

There Is A Light That Never Goes Out

-To die by your side/Well, the pleasure and the privilege is mine.

The Hand That Rocks The Cradle

-I’ll still be by your side, for you are all that matters.

-Together we lie, together we pray.

What Difference Does It Make?

-I’d leap in front of a flying bullet for you

Hand In Glove

-No, it’s not like any other love/This one is different because it’s us.

-If they dare touch a hair on your head/I’ll fight to the last breath.

Work Is A Four-Letter Word

-If you stay, I’ll stay right beside you.

Unloveable

-I don’t have much in my life/But take it, it’s yours.

Shoplifters Of The World

-Learn to love me, assemble the ways/Now, today, tomorrow, and always.

How Soon Is Now?

-I am human and I need to be loved/Just like everybody else does.

Reel Around The Fountain

-People see no worth in you, I do.

* * * * * * * * * *

QUESTIONS

Heaven Knows I’m Miserable Now

-Why do I give valuable time/To people who don’t care if I live or die?

The Boy With The Thorn In His Side

-And when you want to live, how do you start?

Miserable Lie

-What do we get for our trouble and pain?

Girlfriend in a Coma

-Do you really think she’ll pull through?

Paint a Vulgar Picture

-You could have said no, if you wanted to/You could have walked away, couldn’t you?

When Will You Accept Yourself?

-Anything is hard to find/When you will not open your eyes/When will you accept yourself?

Sweet and Tender Hooligan

-Will you free me? Will you find me?

London

-And do you think you’ve made the right decision this time?

Panic

-I wonder to myself/Could life ever be sane again?

Barbarism Begins At Home

-Why? Because of what you are.

* * * * * * * * * *

CRUELTY AND CORRUPTION

Frankly, Mr Shankly

-It pays my way and it corrodes my soul.

Miserable Lie

-You have corrupted my innocent mind.

These Things Take Time

-And you gave me something that I won’t forget too soon.

Vicar In A Tutu

-Get your vile soul dry cleaned.

Sweet and Tender Hooligan

-And he said that he’d never, never do it again/And of course he won’t, not until the next time.

What Difference Does It Make?

-Heavy words are so lightly thrown.

I Don’t Owe You Anything

-You owe me something/Repay me now.

I Won’t Share You

-Has the Perrier gone straight to my head?/Or is life sick and cruel instead?

* * * * * * * * * *

STATEMENTS

These Things Take Time

-You will leave me behind.

I Know It’s Over

-It takes strength to be gentle and kind.

Rubber Ring

-But they were the only ones who ever stood by you.

Back To The Old House

-There’s too many bad memories.

Girl Afraid

-I’ll never make that mistake again.

* * * * * * * * * *

STRUGGLING

What’s The World?

-I’m going under/You can feel them pulling me down.

I Keep Mine Hidden

-Hate, love and war/Force emotions to the fore/But not for me, of course/I keep mine hidden.

You Just Haven’t Earned It Yet, Baby

-You must suffer and cry for a longer time/You just haven’t earned it yet, baby.

That Joke Isn’t Funny Anymore

-It’s too close to home/And it’s too near the bone.

Well I Wonder

-Gasping, but somehow still alive/This is the fierce last stand of all I am.

You’ve Got Everything Now

-I’ve seen you smile, but I’ve never really heard you laugh.

I Started Something I Couldn’t Finish

-I started something/And now I’m not too sure.

Sheila Take A Bow

-How can someone so young sing words so sad?

* * * * * * * * * *

SEX

Handsome Devil

-And I would like to give you/What I think you’re asking for.

-I crack the whip/And you skip/But you deserve it.

-And let me get your head/On the conjugal bed.

Pretty Girls Make Graves

-Give in to lust, give up to lust.

Stretch Out And Wait

-What I do know is we’re here and it’s now/So stretch out and wait.

Ask

-So if there’s something you’d like to try/Ask me, I won’t say no, how could I?

Reel Around The Fountain

-15 minutes with you, oh, I wouldn’t say no.

[aconflagrationofmyown]

You know I hate to ask cause I know it will only hurt me but...how long are you envisioning Elvis living in each story? Captain? Sarge? Big Daddy? I know he is getting happier endings but I'm concerned about the end cause sadly that's the way his story is.

Also I want Gigi to devour Big Daddy and make him so love struck he can't stand it. 😍

I AM SO GLAD SOMEONE ASKED.

First off let me say even for fics where it’s either never mentioned or has yet to be established, they’re all true fix its, ok? So, don’t sweat either way.

But more specifically let’s just gab about the AU’s as I’ve figured them out so far.

A Whole Man -the most concerning perhaps? but at the same time it’s set in his life around the real time of ‘69-70 so, healthwise he’s not awful but I’ve given him shit 1800’s issues and a hell of a lot of work, so, bad news. Also a criminal record with a hanging offense. Oops. But, I have this one universe entirely planned and let me tell you the whole story only spans a whole year at most. And then if y’all like, I’ll keep writing either one shots of the future (that suggests he lives, eh?) or flashbacks digging deeper into any back stories yall want explored.

Sarge: I refuse to date when Elvis or Elaine pass away in this one, I can’t emotionally take it and I want them going out together. He nearly dies many times through the 70’s, that stays in the story but he makes a recovery due to many circumstances jolting the man -Angel of a wife or eight kids aside, only Elvis can save Elvis. The more I plan the second generation and grandbabies the more I find myself assuming he’s there for events in the late 90’s at least. Which surprises me, as I still see him as destined to be die young no matter what. But it seems I’m to softhearted for it. Sixty something is still young, I suppose…😣

Gigi: undecided but we shall be buying far far far more time, and when he’s gone? There’s a sensitive young man named Austin who comes knocking on Graceland’s door to see the home of the man he is about to portray and ask his younger widow about him. Is it possible for two people to love a man together who’s been gone for little while now? They don’t know, but they manage it all the same, and somehow, it’s a little less lonely together…

I really love these types of questions, sometimes I’m more than happy to explain my vision I just don’t wanna spoil unless y’all ask. 💋

[idsb]

hi im new here can you give a brief rundown of like you lol?? where youve lived, jobs, partners, interests, give me the idsb lore please!!!!!

hi!! sure, I have a lot of new followers and I was just thinking the other day abt this and how my blog is like 70/30 my personal life v Taylor so that must be confusing for new people. so yes! here's the spark notes:

My name is Holly and I just turned 28! I grew up outside of Boston and lived in NYC for ~10 years after I went to art school there. I dropped out of college after one semester to pursue my actual dream of touring with artists. After I dropped out I spent a while willingly homeless in NYC so that I could establish myself & my career there. Eventually it worked & I had been doing freelance photography, videography, graphic design and merch sales as steady income since ~2017. I was in a 5 year, emotionally abusive relationship with my high school sweetheart and finally ended it in 2018. A bit after this, I went to Australia for the first time with my then-friend now-boyfriend (Nov 2018). I've been obsessed with Australia since I was like 5 years old and it was an incredible adventure. I spent about 3 weeks there alone without then-friend, and during those 3 weeks met a Man. The last night we spent in Australia on this trip was Christmas Eve, and said man invited me to have an outdoor Love Actually screening and have a wine picnic with him and all his friends. it was one of the best nights of my life. We hooked up and he singlehandedly cured some sex-related fears I had from the previous relationship and I couldn't stop thinking about it for months. Back in America (Jan 2019) I entered my hoe phase in a never-ending quest for validation and slept with every guitarist I'd ever worked with while meanwhile having a big mental breakdown. Enter a John Mayer vibing man we called the Guitarist here, and a lot of Bad Shit he did to me in his own validation quest mental breakdown (May-August 2019). Clearly my only choice was to fly back to Australia to see the other guy! And I did (September 2019)! Then I was mega depresso when I went home bc my life felt hopeless & I'd already lived out all the hope it had going for it :) I continued my hoe phase and chronicled it via Spice Nights where I’d just answer nsfw asks and give advice for like 8 hours straight. This is waxing over it but it was chaotic and I cannot understate the Depression (Feb 2020).

Then the pandemic happened whomp whomp. I lost all my gigs and posted about it on Tumblr dot com, this blog gained a very large following sort of bc of being a Taylor blog and sort of bc of live-blogging all the drama. ms Taylor Swift saw it and she sent me $3,000 to cover my rent for all of lockdown. a lot happened as a result of that but in the end I realized it was not smart to stay in NYC and spent summer 2020 roadtripping around the US with my then-friend who had first come to Australia with me, who had since joined the leagues of guitar-playing-employer-i-was-sleeping-with (there were 4 in total but I was in loveeeeee w this one). Big Cruel Summer vibes. my friend group exploded partially as a result of my behavior and partially bc they were cunts who didn't care about John Mayer vibe man manipulating me. So then I said fuck it and moved to Montana to work in a national park w guitar guy I Actually Loved who had become my boyfriend at that point, and we lived there until winter 2021. Then I started touring again, got insanely successful, was making more money than most people I knew with salaried jobs and booking work all over the world, my relationship ended over some drama I found out about way after the fact but then we got back together & moved in together (May 2023). Going great. Then I got so fucking burnt out from my job I was like stop the presses I am fucking off to Australia I can't do the music industry and the mega late-stage capitalism anymore. so now I live in Melbourne and am a bartender at a fancy cocktail bar and my relationship is sort of a LDR but I’m going home soon maybe(?) and that is what you missed on Glee!!!!

[dorihey]

Today is the birthday of the late Ed Asner. Many are familiar with him as the voices of Carl Fredricksen from Up, Santa from Elf, and Hudson from Gargoyles, as well as Lou Grant from the Mary Tyler Moore Show and the aptly named, Lou Grant (series).

Back in the mid 2000's, my family and I were staying at a very large expensive house that belonged to friends of my parents as guests. They had a larger cable package than we did back at home, and they had ToonDisney. I remember seeing Gargoyles while staying there, on the "Hangin' with the Heroes" block in the evening. I remember seeing this show very vaguely as a younger kid, but I must not have been older than 6 or 7 or so given the original air dates.

I was totally enamored with these characters almost instantly. I hopped on their upscale internet, and immediately perused various Disney media sites at the time and started going down the rabbit hole with what little material the internet had back in like 2004 about the show. I learned about the cast, Greg Weisman's blog Station 8, and somehow convinced my parents to upgrade our cable so I could watch it. I even made a Neopets Fanpage about the show, and I have no idea if it's still around.

I don't have a lot of specific memories about Hudson being my favorite, or even having a particularly verbose knowledge of the show back them, but I DO remember becoming familiar and fond of Ed Asner, seeing a teaser for Up, learning he was in it, and that detail making it NECESSARY for me to watch it on release day.

I remember the evening before watching Up, and enjoying it, but I rewatched it with my mom a few days later. I am not sure what was different here, but I became OBSESSED. I joined a Pixar fan site, became a highly active member, and began absolutely marathoning this film. I also spent 5 hours one evening with a mechanical pencil, very little drawing skill, and drew this. (apologies, the picture is 14 years old and washed out)

To be clear, this was EXTREMELY out of nowhere. I had never drawn anything remotely this detailed before. So I (quite ignorantly, but still strongly) decided to change college majors and pursue art. Still workin' on that one...

Down the line, I ultimately watched Up in theaters 50 times, held movie nights for the fansite over Skype, made multiple forum signatures for myself and other members, and even got invited to Pixar, and met a lot of Pixar leadership (albeit briefly for most).

At the center of this though, Ed Asner was responsible for me gravitating to these characters. I've been pretty consistently enamored with his brand of wholesome curmudgeonry.

(I just made up that word, and I like it, so it's real now)

In any case, I've always felt a bit odd for having an attachment to an actor that hit his acting stride while being middle-aged in the 70s, 20 years before I was even alive - like I'm the only person my age that even knows this guy existed.

I had never gotten to meet Ed, but I did make an attempt shortly before he passed. It didn't work out, but his son Matt runs a charity organization called The Ed Asner Family Center that focuses on supporting individuals and families with autism and neurodivergence. I was fortunate enough to join an early screening of Dug Days before it released on Disney + thanks to a fundraiser by the center, including a Zoom Q&A with Ed. The thing I noticed during the call is that Ed was so immensely quick-witted, absolutely hilarious, and would not leave his piece unsaid. He had an astoundingly magnetic personality. It wasn't open mic, but I managed to get a question through - "What was it that got you into acting?"

Jonas Rivera, the Producer of Up was moderating the call and Ed about verbally trampled the guy by the time he was getting the last few words out, and he knew exactly what he wanted to say.

I don't have the exact words, but it boiled down to "escapism" - which was a bit shocking to me. You've got a former president of SAG, who'd been acting for longer than I have been a living person, and he was immediately compelled to tell everyone that the reason he got into showbusiness is to run from the world and its problems. It was remarkably humble.

Ed passed away exactly a week later. I couldn't eat for 2 days, I was so distraught.

I highly recommend that folks check out a lot of the acting Ed has done. He's absolutely brilliant, and one of the most fun people to watch. He was intimidatingly witty, and yet seemed like the guy who would talk to just about anyone. And then make them laugh their sides off.

I haven't shared my deep admiration for Ed too often other than with folks closest to me, but Ed Asner was a precious gem of a human being, and embodies a lot of things I think the world - particularly folks of the male persuasion - should have a bit more of.

Here's to you, Ed. Have a happy birthday up there for us, big guy. We love ya. <3

(side note, the portrait at the top, I drew to commemorate his first birthday after he passed in 2021. The picture at the bottom was drawn, but not adequately finished imo, about 2 weeks before he left us. I need to give it a proper redo someday)

[hollyhomburg]

It sucks when I decide not to confide in you guys because honestly today was HELL and I cannot go into it without going several pages into my current lore, but BASICALLY

My grandparents are getting kicked out from the house they’ve lived in for 60+ years, primarily because an uncle who is not one of their children is worried about the housing market taking a downturn and not getting his money. The house is a 3.4 million dollar house, it’s next door to my little cabin. This uncle is very well off and in his retirement, when he purchased the house he signed a legal document (notarized by lawyer) that my grandparents could live there for the rest of their lives.

However last month, he sent an email stating that he was kicking my grand parents out on the 5th of November. My mother and a lot of my aunts and uncles are very upset about this, mostly because of my grandmothers dementia- moving her into an unknown location would decrease her memory substantially. A lot of other people where angry on account of them having no place to stay (it’s been decided they’re going to stay with my uncle but at the time we didn’t know where), and because he gave two 91 year old people 30 days! To move 80+ years of their life! a few of my cousins started to chime in, and then my mother sent an email saying that this was not a conversation that anyone should be having but their seven kids and the conversation was moved to a private chat. My grandparents are supposed to move into our house eventually, but our basement apartment is just beginning renovation for them- we need a good year until it’s ready because we’re poor and can only afford to do it slowly and mostly on our own.

And then comes my sister, who has been externally close with this aunt and uncle. She has been mostly non-communicative about this until today, where she called up my mom to see if she could come visit this weekend- because my whole family- all like 70 of us - are banning together to help my grandparents pack up their lives. My mom started to vent to her- and my sister chewed her out for the e-mail saying It was uncalled for and basically took my aunt and uncles side in the whole situation. As well as Criticized her for being financially irresponsible and not having the basement done, blaming her for my grandparents predicament. My mom was /sobbing/ by the end of it. It took my brother and I like- 20 minutes to calm her down.

She then proceeded to call me 5 times before I picked up, and we had a hard conversation about it all, and when she point blank asked me if i thought she should come home this weekend and I told her that no, I didn’t, because our mom needs support not judgment and she’s going to feel her feelings no matter the facts and what we personally think is right, and if she can’t hold her tongue and be supportive to just my mom- then her being here would cause a lot more stress. And that No matter the situation with the rest of the family and what I personally think should happen- my top priority is my mom and getting her through these super tough weeks tbh, not even my grandparents well being, not my aunt and uncle, not even her at this moment.

She thanked me for being honest with her and we ended the call after she apologized for missing my birthday. Which I was honestly really hurt about but brushed it off because I am just too burnt out to care.

Then after we hung up she texted me this, and we had this conversation

And now I’m wondering if I went too far, if I was too mean, if it was bad of me to deny my sister the last chance to see my grandparents in their home. I don’t know, things have been so hard, I hate this, I hate feeling angry and resentful towards people I care about. I just feel like the saying “honesty without tact is cruelty” really applies to it because like, you can about what you’re feeling without it hurting the people you love. I also told my mom I didn’t like the email she sent out to the family- but I was able to do it in a way that didn’t make her sob. Ugh I just don’t know. Maybe I’m wrong and terrible and just ugghhhh I need to sleep

[elvispresleyslut]

DADDY’S BEST FRIEND, ELVIS PRESLEY

A hot summer day in Memphis was beautiful as ever but nothing could beat the beauty of Graceland for me. Ever since the age of 10 my father whom I happened to be close with was long time friends with the one and only Elvis Presley. All my life friends would beg for autographs, pictures, clothing samples as if I could just ask this man for a kind of thing like that.

Elvis was almost like a second dad to me I suppose.

Maybe not the best wording? Considering i've  been drooling over him like every other girl across this world since middle school. Here I am 19 soon to be 20 doing nothing with my life, lusting after a king who probably sees me as a kid who he can spoil all because he has too much money and not enough people he cares to spend it on.

That doesn't even make sense..

My birthday now was coming up on the too soon 30th of June.

My mother never made my life any easier for me. She definitely didn't make it easier for me to accept the party when i was informed that Elvis took it upon himself to host this god awful thing at Graceland.

"Mama we can't just intrude in his home like this and invite all these people from around town as if we even know they're damn names.." I whined following my mother upstairs in our small home.

She sighed and stopped in her steps, "Stop trying to get me to cancel it all because you have a little crush on him. He doesn't mind and it's free, You should be out thanking EP right now instead of crying in my ear." she ends her words with a huff and continues into my little brothers room, dropping a pile of clean clothes for him to fold and put away later.

"I do not have any crush on him, mama." I raise my voice boldly. "How many times am I gonna have to tell you that? The guys like 70.." I add for good measure. It doesn't work.

"You look at him the way your father looks at pie..now will you please leave your ole mom alone."

She teasingly rolls her eyes and walks back downstairs to start on dinner.

"Go see him, Kim. Thank the man for the love of god. He's precious and you know it. He didn't have to do this for you but he seemed more than happy to make your 20th special." She pulls out her apron tying it loosely around her wide hips. "Wear something nice!"

I groan grabbing a hold of my car keys. I couldn't take her determined mindset anymore. I felt like i needed to surround myself in negativity. Why would he want me at his house like that? What would Prescilla think? Im far too old to be having birthday parties at a family friends house, let alone Elvis's.

I soon pull up to his gate driving in without even realizing I was still wearing my bathrobe. Fuck fuck fuck.

"I gotta go back" I whisper shoving my key back in and buckling back in. I begin to let my foot off the brake.

I hear a knock on my glass window and startle with a jump quickly slamming back down on the brake.

"Oh what the actual fuck!" I practically scream grabbing my hair and pulling slightly with overwhelming anxiety.

I contemplate driving off and never coming back home if i can help it but I settle with rolling down my window and laughing nervously for now. Fuck that.

"Woah sweetheart..what're ya doin here at.." Elvis trails off looking down at his watch "4:00 in the evenin'?"

"Ya family alright?" He questions softly. Why'd he have to be so damn sweet?

I slowly look up with the fakest smile I ever did use, "W-what?" I laugh obnoxiously. "No I came here for s-something else..cannot erm..r-r-remember what.." I say leaning forward on my steering wheel groaning in embarrassment.

Why'd he have to look so nice right now in a robe and nothing underneath from what you could tell of his slightly tan chest covered in light hair. Why was I such a whore staring so hard..

"You gonna come in honey or we gonna sit outside n' watch the sunset?" He teases opening your car door.

"N-no uh..I-I can just stay here, right here" I point down into my seat with my fingers. "Just here is fine." I nearly beg out loud.

i rather harshly shut my door back.

He laughs. He laughs at me. Dear god mama why'd she do this shit to me.

"Suit yourself, kid." He drawls out with his thick accent that matter of factly made me squeal at night before bed.

He walks around my car swiftly opening the passenger seat door sitting his fine ass right beside me. I can almost taste the smell of him as he drops into the seat.

"You gonna tell me now what you dropped by for? Or you gonna keep this oddly unlike you demeanor up?" He says with a tinge of tease.

I roll my eyes with a sigh, putting my car into park.

"Im under dressed..it's beyond embarrassing." I push out a fake laugh to ease how nervy I am really.

"Your actin like im lookin'..get to it Kim." he states bluntly.

"Fineeee..goddamn." I stare at my hands in my suddenly cold lap. "I came to say thankyou for wanting to host my "party" but I really can't accept-"

He cuts me off quickly with an unbeatable tone telling me already he wouldn't be taking no for an answer. "Nope. I already have everything done, no need to come beggin me to stop it. Everybody needs a party."

"Please just nothing big..Elvis. Like really.." I glance too quickly down at his wide spread pose and im caught red handed im sure of it. I didn't even have time to truly take in what I felt I could see through his seemingly thin robe.

"Play nice about it and I'll talk to your dad about alcohol" Elvis lets out an almost boyish giggle and I can't help the burning blush that takes over my ugly face.

We chat more for the next 10 minutes about what I'd prefer at my party but he caught on rather quickly I was only trying to turn it into some boring cookout that nobody would stay for.

Before to long I catch his watch set nicely on the arm rest of the seat he was currently in and see I've kept him in my presence too long in a fit of laughs. Not that I was complaining. His perfect teeth.

"Go back inside old man.. Too late for you to be awake." I say jokingly gently shoving him against his door.

He fakes pain and opens the door stepping out and I can't help but bite my lip at the sight of his toned tanned legs but somehow feel a tinge of sadness that I couldn't just yank him back and bone him to no end.

Walking up his porch he turns back to me and waves, "Goodnight honey, I'll stop by tomorrow to see your daddy!" He says with what I hope a joking attitude.

My dad can't know I was ever here on my own dressed like a slut, of course not on purpose. Sigh.

I drive off and head home to eat dinner with my family but all I can do for the rest of my night is think about how truly fucked I'll be at this party.

HI! THIS IS MY FIRST CHAPTER TO THIS HOPEFULLY GOOD STORY LOLS . IM NEW TO THE ELVIS FANDOM AND IM HOPING TO MAKE SOME MOOTS HERE SIGH . IM A LONELY PERSON AND I LIKE TO THINK IM NICE LMFAO! GIVE ME IDEAS FOR MY "BOOK". IM OPEN MINDED AND HAVE NO PLANS YET FOR THIS <3 ENJOY

[syrupgirl]

Prompts

if you wanna use these, just reblog or gimme creds i don’t mind💋

1. “What do you mean you’ve lost it? How could you lose it?”

2. “What are you hiding back there?”

3. “I’ll find them and bring them back, swear it.”

4. “Shit, get behind me!”

5. “I never want to wake up from this.”

6. “I’m afraid that if I touch you, you’ll disappear. Again.”

7. “What is your favourite memory? Of her, I mean.”

8. “I could never abandon you.”

9. “Come here say that to my face.”

10. “What do you mean ‘I’m not ready’?”

11. “If I’d done something- anything things could have been different..”

12. “They don’t know you like I do.”

13. “I though you knew?”

14. “They were like this when I found ‘em…”

15. “You are the only constant I need in my life.”

16. “You are something else…”

17. “You made this? For me?”

18. “Try as you might, you can’t unkiss me.”

19. “Really? Because your brother said quite the opposite.”

20. “It tastes…sweeter than I thought.”

21. “Do you have it with you?”

22. “Can I see?”

23. “I have your back? okay?”

24. “I look ridiculous is this thing.”

25. “What? Nothing clever to say?”

26. “Did you just…smell my hair?”

27. “I’ve never been so happy to have been wrong in my entire life.”

28. “This can’t be the only way!”

29. “I did it for you!”

30. “I don’t go away if you ignore me,”

31. “You shouldn’t be alone tonight.”

32. “It doesn’t always have to be you, y’know?”

33. “Do you understand me? Food? Do you have some?”

34. “What did I do wrong?”

35. “This is the part where you leave.”

36. “Hold onto me, I don’t want to lose you.”

37. “I think…I’ll stay in tonight.”

38. “Why can’t I go with you?”

39. “You leave him out of this.”

40. “Are you mad at me?”

41. “Lay back, you need rest.”

42. “Your shoulders aren't the only ones that can bear the weight of the world."

43. “Just a little bit longer…”

44. “I’ll thank you after we get out of this alive.”

45. “A good luck kiss?”

46. “Watching you is hypnotic to me.”

47. “Your smile makes me wanna smile.”

48. “Do you even hear yourself?”

49. "I haven't kissed you yet today."

50. “Why is it always a fight with you?”

51. “Are you going to stop me?”

52. “Let me do this for you. Please?”

53. “Looking for something?”

54. “We can’t stay here.”

55. "I've lost so many people. I can't lose you too."

56. ���You can’t be here!”

57. “I’ve told you too many times.”

58. “You came?”

59. “Where did you find this?”

60. “I will show you around.”

61. “Are you here to kill me?”

62. “I trust you but I lost some trust in you today.”

63. “Oh please. Live a little!”

64. “I know you’re looking at me.”

65. “Where did we go wrong?”

66. "You think I'm weak, because I'm not like you."

67. “We could run, you know. Far, far away from here.”

68. “Is that a threat?”

69. “Is that a promise?”

70. “Wrap it up, come on.”

71. “It’s nothing, just a few scrapes.”

72. “Midnight snack?”

73. “Move and it’s over.”

74. “I won’t apologise!”

75. “Scratch my back, I’ll scratch yours.”

76. “Something is different about you…I can’t quite place it.”

77. “I don’t need your protection.”

78. “It is okay, you’re safe and sound. I promise.”

79. “Miss me?”

80. “You coming with me or not?”

81. “Close your eyes and take my hands.”

82. “It’s okay to cry. There’s no one here but me and you.”

83. “Am I…Interrupting something?”

84. “Home isn’t an option anymore.”

85. “I’m trying to turn over a new leaf. Please please let me do that.”

86. “You look lonely over here all by yourself.”

87. “Come with me!”

88. “You can’t come around anymore!”

89. “I take orders from your father, not you.”

90. “Were you following me?”

91. “I’ll buy you some time!”

92. “Who’s going to stop us?”

93. “You don’t know when to quit, do you?”

94. “I have two, take one.”

95. “Jealous? Pff…As if.”

96. “Whatever they told you, it’s a lie.”

97. “You don’t have to shout at me!”

98. “Was it you? Did you do this?”

99. “It wasn’t me, I swear!”

100. “Who is going to take care of you if you take care of everyone else.”

[alisonagosti]

Found at Skatepark

I adopted my dog Harvey from the Burbank Animal Shelter on February 12, 2012. At the time, he was nameless, and the card on his cage only had three words written on it: "Found at skatepark." He was filthy and scared, but he walked right up to me and put his two paws up on the bars so that I could scratch his belly, and that was it. I bought him for $70 and took him home the next day. Your life can change that quickly.

Things I want to remember: barking at me every time I'd come through the front door, His deep desire to roll on dead bugs, napping with him in the crook of my arm.

At the time, I was working two minimum-wage jobs, was obsessed with my sketch team, and had a roommate who would later be charged with money laundering. I had no business taking care of myself, let alone a dog. But I wanted so desperately to feel a sense of home— some version of family that I was so completely starved of. At this point in my life, I had no idea how to express that love was something I wanted so deeply and yet completely feared. When you're broke in your twenties, you don't always have the tools to examine your childhood and your parental models; sometimes, you just have to buy a dog and hope that it helps.

Things didn't go smoothly; he suffered from horrible separation anxiety, and when I would leave to go to work, he would bark so loudly and for so long that my neighbor finally slid a handwritten note under my door that simply stated, "Your dog's bark is so shrill and frantic -- it's like nothing I've ever heard before." Not helpful, but a valid observation.

He was one of the most stubborn creatures I've ever met. He refused to be housebroken for much of his early life. I gotta be honest; he never really locked that in -- he was 90% housebroken at best. He would steal food if given any opportunity. Once, when I was painting an accent wall, he rolled in the paint tray for presumably no other reason other than he decided he wanted to. Our lives seemed to mirror each other at the time, and since he never judged me for over-drafting my bank account or stumbling in drunk, who was I to judge him for going through the garbage?

Things I want to remember: His insistence on following me into the bathroom, patiently watching me pee and poop, sleeping on the bathmat as I showered.

It's not that he didn't know the difference between right and wrong. He knew the rules, would assess the situation and then proceed accordingly. If I was out and he needed to pee, why should he hold it? If a sandwich was left unattended, why should he not eat it? Philosophically he raised questions that my young mind was not capable of debating. 

Some may call this asshole behavior, myself included. But Harvey also possessed a kindness and ease with people that I envied. I imagined him as a proud young man on the day of his bar mitzvah, happily introducing himself and encouraging you to check out the dessert bar, "We have cake in pop form and by the slice! Please help yourselves!" He never met a stranger in his life; encouraging or demanding pets from anyone. Literally anyone, he was not picky. I loved to watch him happily trot up to people at the dog park, wagging his tail and waiting expectantly until they obliged.

Things I want to remember: My favorite compliment I ever received for Harvey, "He's perfectly proportional, a lot of little dogs aren't like that."

I loved to watch people melt in front of him: a living teddy bear with oversized ears. He indiscriminately trusted everybody and wanted to sit on every lap. Somehow, people would instinctively hold him like a baby, and he would stay in that space for as long as he was permitted. 

I did not have the same effect on people.

As we got older, I finally started making money; we moved to New York and experienced snow for the first time (we did not care for it). 

Things I want to remember: Landing at Laguardia at 5 AM and traveling to my new apartment. My furniture hadn't arrived yet so I slept on the clothes from my suitcase with Harvey in my arms.

He took everything in stride and quelled the loneliness of a new city. For much of my time on the east coast, he felt like my only friend. 

Things I want to remember: Coming home early from work to find Harvey and my dog walker asleep on the couch.

I started a relationship that was abusive. When he would yell at me, Harvey would hide, and I worried about his safety long before I considered my own. When I eventually fled back to Los Angeles, it felt like we'd both aged several decades.

We entered our 30s at roughly the same time, and Harvey really came into his own. His food theft reached new heights of creativity. On a vacation, I made the mistake of leaving a room service tray in the room with Harvey while I went to lay out at the pool. When I came back, he had pulled some of my clothes out of my bag. I didn't think much of it, but when we got home the next day, he quietly waited for me to unpack before retrieving a room service dinner roll that he'd stashed away in there. The art of it. The patience. He had become a master. 

Things I want to remember: Holding him when I was sad, him generously allowing my tears to fall on his fur.

Another breakup or two, another six months of crying into Harvey's fur before Covid hit. For a good part of 2020, he was the only thing I touched. Outside of logging onto Zoom for work, he was my only purpose. At nine, he had become a reasonable man. Still capable of zoomies, not above destruction or scampery in the name of food, but a calmness had settled over him and eventually me as well.

I fostered a puppy during the pandemic, just like everybody else, and I decided to adopt him. An unforgivable betrayal in Harvey's eyes. The new calm of our house was now loudly disrupted by the idiocy of a puppy. I'll always wonder if he felt replaced. He wasn't. He could never be. We were just adding to our family.

I eventually emerged from my Covid bunker to go on a date with the man who recently became my fiancé. When he first met Harvey, he said, "he really likes me!" I didn't have the heart to tell him that he was just another guest at Harv's unending bar mitzvah; he'd eventually realize it on his own. My family became the four of us, and we became The Unit. Man, I fucking love The Unit. I didn't realize that coming home could be the most exciting part of my day.

Harvey continued to age; he thickened around his middle, and little things started to go wrong. He developed a limp that was eventually fixed with anti-inflammatories, and he developed allergies. But he always bounced back. He seemed indestructible. Looking at him, you would never know he was almost 11. His white fur hid any signs of grey, and he still had the bouncy gait of a children's cartoon character. He had his final act of chaos that Thanksgiving. When we set him down without a leash and he took off after a pitbull (this is not an indictment on pitbulls — I only mention it because of the size difference and sheer lunacy of it — Harvey is an asshole, don’t forget that part). Harv ran after this dog faster than I'd seen him move in years. All four feet off the ground, a fluffy bullet on his way for vengeance. In one simple move, the pitbull took Harvey's head in his mouth and flung him a few feet into the grass. It all happened in a second. When I reached him, he was lying on the ground, stunned. It wasn't until I picked him up that I saw the massive gash on the left side of his head as blood started to spill out. I will never understand why he did that. He decided he wanted to, I guess.

Even that was no big deal for him. Antibiotics and a cone for a couple of weeks and he was back to normal. He really seemed indestructible.

Then, about a year ago, Harvey got really sick and was diagnosed with diabetes -- a disease I didn't think dogs could get. And again, he bounced right back once we figured out his insulin dosage. It became my morning routine. Feed the dogs, shake the insulin, inject, dispose of the needle, repeat at dinner. I almost enjoyed it. The ritual of it. Just a small dose of translucent liquid, and he was functional. He was my buddy, just like he'd always been.

Then, he unceremoniously went blind, a common complication of the disease. He took it in stride, learning the layout of our place and confidently patrolling the dog park. He still went on walks and still played occasionally. And I really thought that this would just be the new normal for the next couple of years, at least.

Things I want to remember:  After he went blind, we would often lose him in the house, asleep in tiny spaces or little nooks, watching him quietly stare at a blank wall while his nose was inches away.

Then a week ago, he stopped eating. For a few days I was able to bribe him with turkey and rice but he eventually refused that as well. We went to the vet the next morning, he could no longer stand on his own. Of course I thought that this might be the end, I also had seen him defy Death at least twice and I had no reason to think he would get Harvey this time. 

The vet took X-rays that revealed an evil black mass had taken over his whole belly; I finally realized that we weren't going to wiggle out of this one. I was brought into a second room by a woman who is best described as Kate Mckinnon's character from the Barbie movie. She had sparkly nail polish, although I can't remember the color, just the sparkles. She started by telling me not to cry, and I wondered to myself what exactly constituted crying, if not this exact situation. I Facetimed my fiancé, who is working out of the country. Weird Barbie returned with my dog, my best friend of 12 years. He could no longer support his head on his own. I held him like a baby -- like I'd done thousands of times before.

"There are so many puppies that need good homes in the shelters." I looked at Harvey for backup, I think in earlier years, he would've given me a look that meant, "Can you believe this lady? She is NOT invited to my bar mitzvah." I didn't acknowledge the comment, and she followed up by saying, "Do you want me to stay with you?"

"No," I answered without thinking, and she disappeared out of the room and back into her rightful place at the bottom of a toybox. I won't go into the next part because it's too hard. To sum it up, he died in my arms. The vet held up a stethoscope to his chest and whispered quietly, "And he has passed." I felt everything in my chest -- lungs, heart, guts -- all ripped out in one moment. It was, by far, the most painful moment of my life.

Things I want to remember: Holding him after he died.

And then he pooped on me. Just a little bit, but he got one more joke in, and I respect him for it.

--- In the nights since he passed I find myself wondering if he knew that I loved him and if I loved him enough. I'm afraid the answer is no. How can you ever love something enough? How can one 11-pound dog ever know what he meant to me? 

I didn't. I couldn't. But he did it so effortlessly.

He was my constant and my family when I didn't have any, a beacon of kindness, and also the funniest person I've ever known. So goodbye, my sweet Harv, my grandpa baby, and my fuzz. You will always be the co-founding member of The Unit. I love you.