#so like why compare the shows at all but esp bc the tone i feel like at least to me is so different

[horizon-verizon]

Yes, it's a little sad the way George is being called out because he wants to say the things he didn't like about HotD, specifically season 2. He was more than satisfied with the first one, although the changes were more or less criticized, but he didn't say anything bad and now that he wants to give his opinion as a writer/creator of the Song of Ice and Fire universe, they call him unprofessional (because they name him as a producer) and that he owes us more books, I even saw someone saying how he should have written the dance.

"unprofessional"

below or contrary to the standards expected in a particular profession

not having or showing the experience, skill, etc., that is expected or appropriate in a person who is trained to do a job well

not exhibiting a courteous, conscientious, or generally businesslike manner in the workplace

I agree completely. I'm not sure what "professional" means in this context, I listened to a TikTok creator who argued that GRRM leaving a quick, strongly-worded, strongly-toned paragraph at the end of a long post abt problems with S2 was unprofessional bc it was vague enough to open up

The thing is, does it really matter when, if we're talking exclusively about any sort of material prospects that GRRM could have to have more of his work adapted into TV/streaming OR the show's viability/popularity in streaming:

HBO owns any and all ASoIaF adaption now and in the future

HBO will continue to make adaptations even after he's gone most likely no matter how "unprofessional" he acts, bc they are getting rich from it and that's all they care about anyway

and GRRM is an old man who's now richer than he needs to be

yes, he is focused on ASoIaF, and this is his more famous as well as the only (I think) adapted part of his oeuvre

if he really has signed away his own work to be HBO's material forever and ever (as I heard) and has not assured that he could be the final authority for stuff NOT having to do with costs and those practical things AND if people really feel as if nothing he could say abt the show could deprive them of loving the show...why the claims of "unprofessionalism" if you're just going to watch the next season and keep HBo's pay up?

a) some of the actors don't even watch the show OR they avoided knowing too much abt the orig story so they wouldn't compare and be disappointed or stay focused on Ryan's vision (out of the mouth of Steve-Corlys' actor); b) some don't watch bc it's just a thing among actors to not watch what they are a part of, therefore how are their feelings really hurt, esp when the running line among fans who criticize the show is that the only or one of the few things abt it that were nonnegotiably good were the actors? When people ride and die even when some say Emma is not that good looking or BR-ugly or they say Matt is ugly and the responses are ranging from "no" to "no one else can play Daemon, I just can't see it"? The critiques are never abt the actors; c) GRRM has ALWAYS praised the actors, esp Paddy and Phia; d) the critiques were ALWAYS abt the writing or choices in STORYTELLING, not the fucking actors and non-writing crew! I swear to god, things get fed into the "Machine of Fandom Disengnuity" every other week: most recently it was why people disliked how HotD did B&C and some said "oh you wanted it to be bloodier, you just want to se a kid die a gory death" (as if what was presented on screen, even just by audio, wasn't "gory" by itself since hearing a literal child's head get sawed off instead of quickly cut off still presents an "image", one with even more physical suffering--again, gore).

I really wanna know, WHAT is at real, deep stake here? HBO/HotD's reputation (S2 was mediocre, and I didn't like S1 but it certainly was just of shoddier quality than the last and people still loved it apparently) that they never really cared abt in the first place bc they know people will keep coming back for more? Or the justification for why they love ASoIaF?

Bc, again, if you really go by books =/= show, you'd be able to just enjoy the show for all of its flaws when they are presented to you as flaws OF when the AUTHOR OF THE ORG STORIES shares their opinion abt the work regardless! Why do you feel the need the label his actions as "unprofessional"

Why do you really care enough to try to argue the man--who said similar abt the separation of bk vs show atp--shouldn't give his two cents on the adaptation of his life's work? And esp if you argue that he doesn't have the obligation to give you more books/complete the series? So he's obligated to let us/you keep our blinders on abt the lore of his books, but not obligated to give us more books? Mayeb I'm missing something here.

Another thing, yes, he has been in the TV industry for long before ASoIaF; there have been some changes and he seems to stay back in ComicCons and writer's meetings. Still, if being "professional" means you need to shut up abt what you don't like abt an adaptation, point blank period, bc outstanding actors or non-responsible people will feel bad about it or the show will suffer or be your work is no longer yours to determine the meaning and themes of once you "sold" it...we're in serious trouble from self justifying capitalist interest.

Oh, and don't forget, when RYAN CONDAL decided to say that:

Daemon was the internet's "boyfriend" when he shouldn't be despite having to know he'd be a fan fav bc he already was one for years bc he's seemingly upset he hasn't been able to ubiquitously convince the female portion that he's a feminist...when such a statement is beyond condescending

the fans of the show/bks don't know the story as well as he does [pic below], when we all know GRRM is not often in the writer's room or has much authority on how they will write the series AND has gone on record to say he actually wanted to write the Dance when Aemon and Baelon were alive!

Basically saying/dismissing fans' critiques for "I know what I'm doing" and "trust me, bro". How is this not "unprofessional" and actually, "Ryan is right? to tell bk readers to shove it"?!

GRRM's July inflammatory post mentioned Maelor [below] and how he'd talk abt that...Ryan's post above hasn't aged well.

And you can see that he already hinted at his writing a blog post abt his issues with B&C; how would he not add other stuff he felt strongly about?! This was a long time coming and some were genuinely surprised not at the strength of his language and his being so direct (that is actually surprising, considering how he said nothing abt how HBO did Dany, Catelyn, Jaime even, Tyrion, the Three Eyed Crow, magic in general, etc. dirty that I've seen) but that he dislikes or could dislike the show or aspects of it when they are so used to using his praises or exec seat as way to say the show is valid for MONTHS and now can't always feel comfortable using it.

And no, I don' think that many TikTok creators are being paid to say they loved the show. I watched and listened to many, and they genuinely love the show or certain aspects of it when they say so. Let's take them at their word. All the power to them, sometimes--as many current HotD fans of S2 have said--people just want to either see their favs onscreen and realized or they are there for messy-boots drama and "comedic", "unserious" entertainment (which is funny, bc HotD has served genuinely interesting and non-superficial tidbits here and there but what's aggravating is how they almost immediately tend to not develop or some fans refuse to get into really acknowledging the problems HotD creates with is storytelling decisions both out and in the universe [race, gender like how they wrote Rhaenyra's sons and the Velaryons or the women's....passiveness and dragging an inevitable war post-Lucerys or trying to maintain Rhaenicent]).

[kuiinncedes]

why are the episode titles like ,, in this font lmfao

[binniesthighs]

cherry knot | reader x ryujin

a/n: you may be thinking to yourself, ro! a gg fic?? how unlike you!! well, boy do i have news for you 😂 truthfully, i’ve always been toying with the idea of writing a lil somethin’ (esp for ryujin god i love her) so i thought why not! if this isn’t your cup of tea, that’s totally okay <3 those who do read, thank you so much for reading and i hope that ya like it hehe and let me know what you think of it! :D (thank you @dom--minnie​ for enabling me too ;) 

cherry knot | reader x ryujin 

🍒 Pairing: self insert, female reader x shin ryujin 

🍒 Genre: fluff n’ a lil bit suggestive 

🍒 Tags: friends to lovers, high school au (everyone depicted is 18+), all girls school au, high school crush!ryujin, shy!reader, confession of feelings, that good, good makin’ out, ryujin being flirty and smug as hell bc i love her, yeah this is just me gushing about shin ryujin, ro trying new things on the blog :) 

🍒 Word count: 2.9k 

🍒 CWs: mentions of food and eating reader included

The grass felt sticky and uncomfortable under your crossed legs, and when you swiped your hand against the skin, you could feel the indentation from the blades. Your knee-high socks felt itchy too; everything felt itchy. Even the cotton of your shirt felt like it was suffocating, and the bow tied around your neck which hung loosely should have hung even looser. 

To distract yourself, you plucked up the blades of green and tied them into knots absentmindedly. It was easier to pay attention to your idle hands compared to paying attention to her. 

Could she even tell that you were looking? Could she see out of the corner of her eye when she threw her cotton-candy pink hair behind her ear? Could she tell that you watched as she gulped down the lemonade and caught a glance at the peachy fuzz of her neck exposed by her collar? 

Stop looking. Stop looking. 

Your other friends tied up their hair in clips and with lazy hair ties to free their sweating necks from the sun. No matter the sweltering heat, it was always tradition for your picnic just before the summer vacation. One of them had brought a cake and each of the girls attacked it viciously with small forks and smeared bits of frosting on each other’s noses. 

“Come here!! You’re next!!” They beamed while launching themselves in your direction to dot your nose with the white cream. 

A flurry of high pitched giggles peeled out from each of you once another frosting victim had been dubbed. Your cheeks felt furiously hot knowing that she was looking; and that she was laughing along with the rest of them. 

“Awwww cute.” She adored with a smile that turned her dimples into whiskers on her cheeks. 

You quickly wiped it off with a handkerchief that settled into your damp hand.  

She’s looking, she’s looking…

The other girls pranced around the checkered picnic blanket in their white socks--undoubtedly painting them with green that their mothers would scold them for later. Their careless steps made a mess of the food wrappers and canvas backpacks that held down the corners of the thin fabric. The joyous cheers of the girls seemed to harmonize with the song of the cicadas in the trees; both sounds reminded you of the coming of the summer and the humid weather that makes the air dense. 

One of the girls brought out her phone and played loudly from it one of her favorite songs which she knew every word too, regardless of the fact that her tone was far from the singer’s. 

You and your friends never cared much for how others would view you. Even at school when you would march through the hallways arm-and-arm, others would stare at the way that none of you batted an eye at those who would glare. 

They were just jealous was all. 

“Be careful!!” You found yourself scolding, “What if you fall running around like that?” 

In response, your friends promptly stuck out their tongues in your general direction. 

“Don’t worry about it,” Ryujin coolly popped another cherry into her mouth from the bowl by her crossed legs. “If they fall, let them! It's funnier that way.” 

She threw a wink right at you, which you almost didn’t catch because you had quickly averted your eyes to become much more interested in the tiny tea-cakes. 

“You’re always worrying Y/n! Its summer!”

“I-I do not.” 

Ryujin chuckled in that way that always made you feel like your heart was just about ready to leap out of your chest. 

“Lighten up! Come on!” 

Before you could process it all, your friend patted down the wrinkles in her skirt and threw off her shoes. She rose, and neared your corner of the blanket with hands outstretched. 

“Stop worrying about things or if people are watching!” She scolded you with a cute and tiny pout, “Get up!” Ryujin wriggled her hands with emphasis to show you that you could take hold of them. 

“W-what…?” 

The other girls giggled on, hardly even noticing the two of you over their singing. 

You grabbed onto her hands, already loathing how damp your own felt against hers out of your own nervousness. She still held onto you tightly, saying nothing of them and helped you to your feet. Immediately she brightened once you played along and started to swing your arms in tune with the song. Your friend lip synced to the rap part and you felt just about ready to swoon from how cool she looked saying the words with ease. 

“Dance with me!! Don’t pay attention to people walking by or anything like that!” 

Ryunjin led you by the hand to the patch of grass with little white and pink flowers laced into it. You really did try to pay attention to dancing, but everything else seemed to be distracting even when you tried hard enough. She brought your hand up higher to spin her, and when she twisted, everything seemed to happen in slow motion: the billow of her plaid shirt, her rosy-pink hair which swiped just at her shoulders, even the way that the sunset melted behind her into swirls of sunburst yellow and vibrant orange. It was like she was all a part of it. 

“Your turn!” She said, twisting you too. 

You didn’t realize that you would have been as dizzied by it as you were, but when you lost your footing, she was just as quick to help you with her hands carefully grasped onto your shoulders. 

“You okay?” Ryujin asked, out of breath, but still genuine. 

“I’m fine!” 

Your knees wobbled with barely any strength to them, but you mustered every bit of confidence that you had to keep being this close to her. You surprised yourself when you reached back for her hands to continue swinging them between you. 

The other girls collapsed back onto the blanket in a pile of shallow exhales and airy laughs that they exchanged between them. 

“No more dancing, I-I can’t do any more…” One of them announced while leaning against the shoulder of another one of your friends. 

“I forgot! I brought this!!” One of your friends with pigtail braids dove deeply into her backpack and pulled out nearly all of the contents before finding the small cube-case which was decorated with an obscene amount of keychains. “My camera! We have to take some pictures so that we can remember this!” 

The other girls squealed in agreement and ganged up on her to fit into the frame of the white Polaroid camera that she had also splattered with stickers. 

“Here, I wanna show you something.” Ryujin drew your attention back to the blanket where she settled back down with her own bag draped over her legs. 

“What is it?” 

“Ryujinnie! I wanna take your picture too! Your pink hair is so pretty…” One of your friends cooed with a sad downturn to her lips, “I hope that you never change it.” 

“Hmm, I don’t know. We’ll see. My cousin has been saying that she wants to see what I would look like blonde these days.” 

The small talk didn’t concern you too much, you were more concerned with what it was that your friend had to show you. 

“I’m going on a trip with my cousins soon so we’ll see what happens.” 

Your friend sighed, and skipped over the mess of the blanket to pull Ryujin by the wrist to the walkway a little farther off. “You’d look so cute over here!” 

She pardoned her, and stumbled after the eager girl to let her take a Polaroid of her. Even from far away, you could still hear the two of them admire the picture with happy little expressions of “ah! I told you that it would look good!” 

The two girls returned, and you began to worry if your friend even remembered what she had said in the first place. 

What is it? What does she want to show me? 

“Shoot!!” Another one of your friends huffed out while looking at her phone, “I forgot that I have to tutor the middle schoolers today!! I’m late!!” 

The girls went to action in a mere matter of seconds sweeping up the picnic assortment and shoving the leftovers into their backpacks. 

You helped them and tried to look over to your other friend who didn’t return your glances. Perhaps she really had forgotten. 

You let your imagination run wild for just a few moments, although the more that you did, the more it all just seemed preposterous. Maybe it was a confession letter, maybe she had written for you one of those poems like she had liked to do, maybe she had rather wanted to talk to you about something...say something that you wanted to say back…

“I’m going to stick around.” Ryunjin said suddenly with her hands on her hips. “Y/n, you’re welcome to stay too if you want. We don’t exactly have to go home yet since the sun’s still up.” 

Your friends looked to you for your answer, to which you stammered out an, “O-okay…” The best that you could. 

“See you later!!” They called after with their shoes only half-slid onto their feet. 

You waved them off, but the farther that they walked away, the more the realization started to hit you that you were alone with her. The sound of your heartbeat echoed in your ears, and you calmed it trying to think about anything else but the fact that now her attention was truly undivided upon you. 

“You said that you wanted to show me something?” 

Your friend nodded, and patted the grass beside her for you to join her. She gathered up the small bundle of cherries left behind and positioned them into her lap. 

“I learned this trick a little bit ago and I wanted to show you!” 

“A trick?” 

She nodded, and plucked from one of the crimson berries a stem which she put directly into her mouth. 

“What are you doing?!” On the surface, it didn’t seem like the most sanitary thing to do. 

Ryunjin stifled a laugh and lightly hit you on the arm to chastise you. “Just wait a minute!” 

You watched in your confusion as her face contorted a little, and her eyebrows twisted like she was thinking. Her cheeks puffed a little too, and you could tell that she was doing something with it in her mouth--it was only then when you realized that you had been intensely observing her mouth. 

In your embarrassment you threw your eyes in the other direction, but it was no use one you heard her start to giggle at how flustered you had become. 

“It’s okay, you’re supposed to look.” She assured you. 

“What-what is it?” 

“Annnnd done!” Your friend proclaimed proudly and you struggled to meet her again without feeling like your whole face and the tips of your ears were burning up. 

Right on the pink of her tongue she had tied the stem into a tiny knot which she displayed proudly. 

“You...did that with your tongue?” 

“Mm-hm!” 

Your hands reduced back to their clammy state, and they found the grass between your own folded legs to find something to do. 

“That's...that’s pretty cool…” 

“I know right?!” 

Back came your friend's little dimples, and this time your chest started to feel like it was swelling with heat. 

Stop looking, stop looking…

“I can teach you how to do it some day if you’d like.” Ryujin’s tone dropped lower, and more serious in the way that some had thought to be intimidating. To you, there was nothing more that could make you feel the beat of your own heart more obviously. 

“Teach me? How??” 

The question felt like a butterfly in your lips, fluttering and ticklish, light and uncertain. You met her eyes the best you could; even though you knew that there was nothing about her that you didn’t already know, or that was threatening. 

Your friend tilted her head, inspecting you and the way that you could barely keep your glance away from her lips--stained just a little red from the cherries--then smiled. 

“W-what? What is it? Why are you smiling?” 

She sighed, and craned forward on one of her hands in the grass, bridging the distance between the two of you to caress down the side of your face, all the way to your jaw with the back of her fingers. 

“You’re just too cute.” 

“Hm?” Your chest threw itself up and down, and you could thinly feel the breath that tried to fill your lungs when she was this close. 

“I just can’t handle it any more.” 

“Me?” 

Ryunjin nodded, softening her eyes until they were nearly closed, and rid the two of you of all space, leaning over just so you could feel the weight of her chest nearly pressing into yours. At first, she placed the lightest of kisses into you, so light that it barely brushed against your lips, but merely imprinted upon them. She leaned back, leaving you with the ghost of a feeling of her upon you. It felt a bit unfair how fleeting it was, and how she looked at you like that: smug as ever, but as blissful as she always was. 

Your breaths tried to make sense of it all, if it had just happened, and what to think of it. As quick as it was, all you could want was to feel it again. 

“Ryu--” 

She cradled both sides of your face in hers, leaning in with more fervor and parting your lips with hers, leaving you to squeak from the sudden movement. You couldn’t figure out how to kiss back at first, or if you should hold her too. Your head felt like it was spinning in circles from your disbelief when you could taste the tiny tang of the sweet and sour cherries which lingered on her lips. She rubbed her thumbs into your cheeks, and angled you better to let her growing smile paint your own mouth from corner to corner. 

At last, you were able to find a rhythm which suited you, and you kissed her right back. She giggled at your stroke of confidence and the vibrations made your whole body tingle. Your feet had surely fallen asleep where you had folded them beside you, but the numb feeling of them dissolved once her hands fell to your shoulder where she held to you tightly. The pressure from the tips of her fingers made you shiver, and you too smoothed down the pink shine of her hair. 

The warm and ticklish feeling of her tongue grazed your lower lip where she changed her approach and deepened her kiss. The heat of tongues finally met in the middle testing and learning more of the other the closer that you became, and tiny airy gasps got stuck between both of your curiosity. In your lap, her hands found yours and they laced together and held tight; each digit wrapping the other and becoming one with the eagerness of her thumb rubbing little circles into the squishy parts of your hand. 

After the heat of your passion started to melt, you found yourself hiding your giddy laughter the best you could once she started to peck at your lips over and over until you felt like she had kissed you so close to the brim that you would overflow. 

“I said that you’re cute and I mean it!” She snuck the phrase in between a couple more kisses, eliciting you to fold up in your giddy embarrassment from the compliment. 

Ryunjin pulled away, and popped another cherry into her mouth from the bundle, then threw her arms around your shoulders. You simply let your hands rest in her lap covered by the plaid of her skirt; shaking from the release of the endorphins and the adrenaline. 

“Ryujin...I wanted to tell you that I’ve had a crush on you for a...really long time…” You shied, but she brought your chin back to look at her directly. 

“Good. Me too.” 

You couldn’t even process the combination of her words for them to make sense. White noise filled your ears, even though it should have been obvious from the way that she had kissed you like that. 

“Oh! Here. I wanted to give this to you too. Something to remember me by.” 

She reached for her bag, and pulled out a white-out pen from the front pocket. The Polaroid had faded into its full color, and she focused with her tongue peeking from her mouth as she wrote the message: 

see you soon <3 

- ryujinnie 

Over her head in the picture, she doodled a few hearts, then she blew on the ink to dry it. 

“For you!” 

You took the picture with your hands still thoroughly shaking, and all you could utter was a “thanks” while you took in your friend looking as gorgeous as she always was. You knew then that you would treasure the image forever, and the day which it was taken. 

“Who knows,” Ryujin started, and let her head fall to your shoulder where she nuzzled in, “This might be the last that you’ll see of my pink hair too.” 

You turned the picture over, already sensing how it made your heart feel like it was aching sticky and sweet, just like the cherries. 

~🌹~

Bunch of (Ro)ses! 

@minaamhh @dazzlehoseok @synnocence @jjewibeans @hyunsluvv @unexceptional-h @bobawithchaitea @lechanters @sailorhyunjinz @silencefavarchive @lunarskzzz  @yourdaddychan @bubblelixie @spnobsessedmemes @cherrychngkyn @iwanttobangchan @dom--minnie @waterthemoon @pastelracha @mistakensilence @hotgorloikawa @bowlofblueberries @lmhmins @eunaeiekim 

[plan-d-to-i]

I'm feeling like such a whiny bitch but I just. really didn't like the translation of mdzs. I know it flows better in some ways but the changes are just, it doesn't feel like mdzs. Also, it kinda softened jc. I was hoping they wouldn't, but. I'm just sad. I had such expectations. Now I have to listen to my Identitarian cousin comment on wwx's cultivation from a 'christian' perspective (bc it has 'demonic' in the name, I was already expecting it) and how jc was just being cautious and he was right, bc the tl says it was 'precautions against people being possessed by wwx' and that they were sure to 'lose half their lives' by his torture, BUt they weren't killed. he was doing the 'good work'. (why she even reading it?!! leave it ALONE!!)

Sorry for coming to you to whine, but I miss the old tl. I wish they had fixed the flow but not changed so much of the words, ig. Why can't the Jingshi be called the Jingshi?. I miss 'great news!' and 'mark your words' and just. UGH

haha don't worry I will be the bigger bitch. I really really didn't like it. I knew I wouldn't like it when snippets were posted, and I didn't like it when I got it. But I didn't buy it thinking it will be life changing. I bought it because it was important to me to a. further compensate MXTX for the joy her work brought me <3, and b. to contribute to showing publishing companies this genre is financially profitable. That there is a market for it so they're incentivized to invest more in such translations in the future. Which is why I believe everyone should buy them (if they have the means). Also I don't pretend that my taste speaks for everyone. I'm sure 99.9% of people will be more than satisfied. The art additions are nice.

I agree that it made some weird choices re some of jc's lines and added words, changed some meanings/emphasis [what was the reason! it's not in the og text]... Don't love what they called his sword. Admittedly I might not be so sensitive to it if this fandom weren't such a shit show. The glossary is all over the place, esp the character one? The tone is all over the place. Are we being silly? Are we being serious? Are we being random? Is it an actual glossary with facts or are we misleading the reader for suspense. Don't see the point. I would've preferred if they used it to keep more pinyin in and just add the definitions there, eps since a majority of the target buyers are already familiar with the work & names. It can feel a bit like someone popped open a thesaurus to make the translation different for the sake of having it be different, so it can feel like the linguistic choices lack continuity. I too will miss the things you mentioned... But I also think perhaps the dissatisfaction stems from the fact that I ended up reading all the translations that were out there in whatever varying degrees of completion they were. So in my heart I couldn't help but wish for (the impossible) something that would distill the best in all of them into one ultimate translation to rule them all. But ofc that wasn't going to happen, this is just another new translation. So it depends entirely on how you vibe with the translator's sensibilities. It will also be particularly hard not to compare it against what you're used to that was your first intro to the story in the english language. A bit like hearing a beloved song in a different key... it might sound a bit off but the meaning is still pretty much the same.

[firebirdsdaughter]

We really ignoring Horobi murdering Izu who not trying to kill him and the fact while he didn’t started this cycle. He sure as hell doing himself no favors by murdering Izu who Artuo closet ally and act all surprised when Artuo hate him. Not acknowledging he the cause for this malice in Artuo. Should Artuo still try to get though to him even though he murder Izu who got no back up compare to Jin who died before and can very well be bought back again?

…

Uh.

Can I just ask… Why are you on my blog? It’s not like I’ve been subtle about my love for Horobi. And you must be on my blog bc I’m pretty sure I haven’t put any of those thoughts in the main tag, and have been carefully tagging them as complaining/negativity/opinions/salt.

1) I’m not saying Horobi was ‘right,’ I’m saying he isn’t in a sane place right now and this wasn’t a ‘cold blooded murder,’ esp bc I’m pretty sure he understands that he regrets it now. He’s been trained for more than ten years to respond to things w/ extremity and violence, as evidenced by the Ark having him repeatedly take out or try to take out things/people that were making him feel in any way—what happened w/ Midori, why he was driven to attack Jin in 41. From Horobi’s extremely damaged and fucked up perspective, he just wanted to make the pain and confusion go away. He didn’t try to hunt out Izu, she approached him, and knowingly endangered herself. Which is why I’m also calling the fact that we’ve seen Izu move faster than a car, she could have dodged the shot and didn’t, so it’s ineffective as drama bc it was easily preventable. I’m calling bs on the writing.

2) Horobi’s definitely not surprised that Aruto hates him? He might be surprised that Aruto went full Ark (I am, too, that feels out of character, I would’ve expected him to just go regular berserk on his own). I’m not saying it’s wrong for Aruto to be mad. Like I just said, I would have expected him to go berserk on his own, which might have ended up leading to Jin’s death anyway. Like… Where did you get that. Actually don’t answer that. Aruto getting angry and going after Horobi would have been one thing, though the way he went Ark is weird to me. What bugs me is the way it’s being treated/reacted to as a ‘black and white’ situation when it should be more grey. Horobi is mentally unwell, and there were multiple factors at work/responsible for the situation. This isn’t just ‘Horobi is a bad person it’s all his fault.’ This is also ‘contrived drama by the writers who are hoping we forgot Izu can break land-speed records.’

2.5) I’m not expecting Aruto to reach out to him at this point. Hell, I’m not even saying ‘forgive’ him, even though I think by this point Horobi has figured out he regrets it. What should really happen is someone else intervenes and keeps them away from each other until both are more stable. Really, someone should have stepped in to control that on both ends. Aruto shouldn’t have been left alone. Neither of them should have. I do think more effort should have gone into reaching out to him before it happened. If they hadn’t been alone in there/if someone w/ a little more ‘emotional/mental experience’ had been present, things might’ve gone differently.

3) Izu still not having a back up is ridiculous, literally everyone knows Aruto is Zero-One, this feels like just terrible planning/lack lustre writing imo, and on top of that, Horobi didn’t know she had no backup. Still doesn’t make his reaction ‘okay,’ bc violence is never the answer, but he’s shown before he believes in bringing AI back through backups, so it may not even have occurred to him that she wouldn’t have one. Additionally, we don’t know Jin has a back up. We can’t say he ‘can very well be brought back again’ bc we don’t actually know that. We don’t know if ZAIA kept that data, Williamson just said they ‘repaired’ him. And that’s also it, even if it exists, ZAIA has it. Not Horobi. Also… This is KR, they could figure out some MacGyver to bring Izu back, even if it’s not clear now, though that’s more of a meta thing. Actually, what I would love to happen is Horobi helps bring her back, maybe as part of therapy.

Look, disagreeing is fine. That’s why I’ve been trying to keep my negative reactions out of the main tag. I’m not trying to get into fights, I’m just venting. I’m analysing what I see and interpret. It’s not that Horobi was ‘right’ it’s that he’s mentally and emotionally unstable rn bc of what happened to him, he should not be expected to know how to react calmly to things, esp if under pressure and in an intense situation. I also literally just wrote a post about how I don’t think it’s fair to blame Izu entirely, either. I comment about blaming the humans (esp Yua and Fuwa (whom I love dearly), but they did escalate the situation and then leave Aruto alone there, wtf did they leave him alone???) bc if they’d listened to Izu at the start we’d likely not be in this mess, or if they’d actually tried to reach out to him before, things could have gone differently.

This is my point of view. If this is upsetting to you, which it seems to be from the tone of this Ask, I recommend blocking my blog, bc these are my feelings on this, and I’m not going to change. I’d block you so that you wouldn’t have to see my posts, but then you wouldn’t be able to see this answer, which I hope explains some of my position, so I’ll leave it for now. Besides, in the end, it’s just a tv show, and it doesn’t actually matter, for all I can get very emotional about things, esp bc Horobi as a character became very important to me.

I hope at least some of that was coherent. I have a hard time articulating my thoughts (part of why I repeat myself so much), and I have been extremely exhausted for the past few days bc my sleep schedule is messed up, so it’s even worse.

I’m not apologising for having an opinion and an interpretation of a piece of media, and I never will. That’s not something I should be required to apologise for. I’m not hurting anyone, bc, again, it’s just a tv show. I’m just in my corner, rambling. I don’t mean any of it as an attack against people who disagree, everyone interpret things differently. For instance, I have things in media that I dislike so much it makes me feel physically ill to think about them, but I just filter them out and it’s fine. I’m even on friendly terms (I hope?) w/ people who like some of those things that make me feel sick, but it’s fine, bc we just don’t discuss them. I know people I disagree about things w/, less viscerally, and have actually had discussions w/ them about that stuff.

Having differing opinions is one thing, but I don’t appreciate the aggressive tone here. I’m saying this partially bc I do understand getting very fired up about something, even if it’s fictional (*looks pointedly at my own blog*), so I’m assuming you just feel very strongly on the subject, but please be aware of how your words might come across—bc the another part of the reason I’m saying this is that I know if I had been in a slightly different mood when I saw this, it might have greatly upset me to unwell levels. I hope it was not your intention to attack me on anything, and that this is just something you feel passionate about, but as someone who often struggles w/ tone and knows it… Please consider it. It can be harmful.

[catboyelimgarak]

Omg that sounds like such a freakin hassle;; I'm so glad that I already had a 3ds by the time I bought DDD (I was... a few years late) BUT THEN they did that package release thing, and I got those. Thankfully I have a ps4 and that's what I play them all on;;

But No I totally understand that for a good while there you can kinda guess Nomura might have had some of this planned. Tbh I'd guess maybe he had kh1, kh2, COM, and Days planned out, but after that it became a mess and more contradictions started popping up. He normally is pretty good at having it tie back into the story in some way (like the inclusion of Terra Aqua and Ventus), but he also has this dumb habit of raising SO MANY QUESTIONS, giving us answers to like, 2 in the next game, THEN GIVING US EVEN MORE!!! WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS BLACK BOX!! WHY IS XIGBAR LIKE 3 DIFFERENT PEOPLE!! WHERE IS MY BABY BOY DEMYX!! But maybe I've just been so used to his bullshit because I've literally been playing (or... watching my dad play for a bit there) since I was 3, and I'm so intrenched into this story that I don't even care what he does with this anymore. Like I have no clue what the fuck the plan for kh4. What the fuck even is Quadratum. Why is this weird lovechild of Riku and Noctis that showed up in an in-game ad actually relevant?? AAAAAAAA

Tho, going back a tad, I guess there still is the argument that he only intended for kh to be a one game thing because the whole "there's only one keyblade and it chooses it's weilder" thing from kh1 was so quickly scrapped omg

Also I totally get not wanting to play Re:Com bc the gameplay... well tbh I'm one of the weirdos who doesn't really mind the card based system but also I have to be in a Very Specific Mood to play it. Which sucks bc I honestly think it has some of the best story in the entire series. It also gives us Larxene aka my best bitch.

Sorry omg I talk waaay too much esp about stuff I like I'm sorry I'm bothering you;;;;

I made another post on my main blog that holds this one, and honestly, Nomura possibly did think KH would be an only one perhaps, but somewhere in there he got inspired to make another and then fell down the rabbit hole. Because if you compare the first game to all the others, it has a totally different tone and feel to it, thus making it so much more magical and whimsical than the serious sequels/prequels that just further confuse us lmao.

You’re not bothering me at all!! I can talk ages about this fucken dump truck of a series! You should hear/see me and my friends talk about this in person as we are introducing out other friend to the series (she was gifted the game by our other friend, the 1.5/2.5 remix ones when it went on sale a few months back)

It’s always good to see fellow Star Trek fans who are into more similar stuff 👀

[mxnark]

the best version of yourself 

december 31, 2019

mina isn’t the type to feel ashamed of herself. everyone around her new that she was confident and outspoken. whatever she thought of inside her head, there would be a 59% chance she’d say it with a 41% chance she’d keep it to herself just because she had some manners. of course, she had some class by making a bunch of rant posts on her spam rather than on her main instagram or main twitter. some of her thoughts on real life would go on her stan twitter, but she’s tried her best to keep that mainly kpop and movies. but, to be honest, she wouldn’t have made a spam had it not been for her mutuals and her friends in real life. 

this time, however, she felt emotions that she was afraid to tell anyone else. 

she usually watched the gayos on her own, since she was the only one in the house who had an interest in them because her favorite idols were on that show. however, the one she always kept an eye on was mbc’s gayo daejejun because of the amazing stages that the idols would perform. not to mention, it was the gayo with the countdown to the new year. however, this time, she debated if she even wanted to watch it considering that this was the same exact one that she made a video audition for, only to not get in. 

when she saw the post on mbc’s page, she was disappointed, but not surprised. it was bold of her to assume she would ever get the chance compared to the other dancers. when she watched the other entries, she was already beginning to feel insecure. but seeing the announcement only supported her negative feelings. however, one name catches her eye and it’s the main reason why she watches the music show tonight. 

chungha isn’t the only reason why she’s watching this, but she’s the one mina looks forward to seeing the most. it’s weird how almost two years ago, mina became a fan from watching her on the fourth season of the mgas. now, she was watching her as not only a fan, but a friend. it’s only a glow up she can talk about on her spam, but she’s able to use her excitement for her tweets while streaming. 

she makes sure to tweet about her favorite idols and their performances before the awaited dance performance comes. when it begins, she quickly takes out her phone as she patiently waits for her friend to be shown on her screen. she manages to record the 30 seconds of chungha’s dance on her instagram story while whisper-screaming throughout all of it. “ahh!!! kim chungha is so cool!!!! she’s the coolest unnie ever!!!” and a bunch of “wow!”’s and “so cool!”’s. for the group performance, she kept all her excitement on her twitter with a few pictures saved for her spam later on. 

it’s odd. before watching this, she thought she was going to feel an overwhelming amount of jealousy just by seeing chungha for a second. but after the performance ended, she couldn’t help but feel inspired. perhaps it was because of the fact that this wasn’t the first time she’s seen chungha on national television, but mina didn’t feel too upset like she thought she would. what a relief. 

she posts the pictures on her spamsta (spam + finsta) once the countdown for the new year is finished and captions it with her thoughts. after she posted it, she locked her phone, turned off her tv, and went upstairs to go to bed, excited for what was to come in the future. 

notokmina: do you see her??/ that’s the coolest bitch in the world !!!! ever !!!!!

watching her tonight gave me so much motivation tbh. i remember i used to be so… starstruck by her when i first saw her on mga4 and now i know her in real life and we’re friends !!!! i’m so glad she got to audition for this and perform onstage in front of a bunch of idols. she’s so cool!!!! 

i’m gonna work hard with future covers so that i can hopefully be dancing on that same stage!!!!!!!!! it’d be cooler if it was w her!!!! but yeah. hopefully if i work hard enough, i can be on the stage like her (and my cousin and brother if theyre reading this who knows) 

she leaves a comment under her post. 

notokmina: unnie, if ur reading this, hi!!! very proud of u uwu 

… 

january 2nd, 2020

having been on stan twitter since she moved back to korea, she’s gotten to explore the many sides of the website. though she’s primarily a kpop fan account, she also keeps tabs on film twitter. it’s to the point where she even has mutuals who are apart of that community and she frequently talks to them about her favorite movies (recently, it’s been about it 2 because she loves her best boys richie and eddie). so of course, when she asked for movie recommendations on her account, she hoped that said mutuals would see it and give their insight. 

though there were many suggestions, she chose lady bird by the end of it. she knew about the movie years ago, but she never really got around to watching it until now. she’s read mixed reviews, so she was never really able to form a solid opinion on this movie. she told herself not to expect much, since this was a coming-of-age film. but, by the end of it, she found herself in tears. she goes on twitter and writes up a tweet as a response to the movie. 

michi @noplayboy_mp3: film oomfs is it weird to say that i kin w lady bird lol  michi @noplayboy_mp3: no but the film is so good i dont want to drop any spoilers but lady bird is like… so relatable? esp bc im kind of in her situation now.  michi @noplayboy_mp3: icb greta gerwig said “michi has rights”... perhaps i will watch little women when i get the chance

before she’s about to make a tweet about watching midsommar next, she hears her phone vibrate. putting her laptop to the side, she picks up her phone and sees an email from snu. 

dear mina, 

the admissions committee at seoul national university has re-reviewed all aspects of your application in its holistic review process, and you have an updated admissions decision. you may now view your updated admissions decision in your portal.

she gasps. 

as she clicks on the link to her portal and logs in, she was immediately welcomed by the site with a big “CONGRATULATIONS!” and if that wasn’t already obvious enough for her, she looks around to find the little “status: accepted” on her page. she sighs in relief and puts her phone to the side as she lies on her bed. she’s not necessarily excited that she got into a school. even now, she was still questioning if she wanted to go to school to begin with. all she knew was that at this point, she was going somewhere. whether or not this is what she really wanted to do, she at least has an idea of where she’s starting. 

maybe now her mom would stop badgering her. maybe now she can show her that she could do things without her. 

…

“i got accepted into snu today.”

it’s used to start discussion, even though she didn’t really want to talk about it with her. it had to come out somehow because even if she was nervous with how she was going to reply, at least her mom would be aware of it. 

her father was the first to say something about it and mina wants to verbally thank him for speaking before her mom does. “honey, congratulations! i knew you would be able to get into that school.” 

“thank you,” mina says with a small smile before she looks over at her mom to see what she will respond with because it was obvious she had something to say about it. 

“why did it take so long for a response?” she asks. “you applied for early decision, didn’t you?” 

it takes a lot for mina to not say something snarky in response. she’s not going to do that now. not so soon. “well, competition’s pretty tough. a lot of kids are applying for snu. especially in my class.” she wasn’t exactly lying, but it was a better response than “i was waitlisted for a month.” and even if she responded with that, at least she got into the school. wasn’t that enough? 

her mom lets out a small “hm” before eating more of their dinner. “well, good job on getting into that school. with how long the response took, i was starting to worry.” 

mina frowns. “i got into other schools, you know.” 

“but did you want to get into any of those other schools?” when mina’s silent for a response, her mother only continues. “you said that you were aiming for snu and it took long enough in order to get a response.” 

“can’t you just be happy over the fact that i actually got into the school?” mina asks, feeling her voice rise. “i thought you would be proud of me. is it that much of a surprise that i got in?” 

“all of your friends got accepted into their schools quicker.” mina feels her grip tighten on the chopsticks in her hands. “all i’m saying is you should’ve at least tried harder or at least recognize that you should’ve done better.” 

mina finds it hard to calm down after hearing that. it’s not like she didn’t expect a response like that, but to actually hear it from her makes her laugh bitterly. it’s sad to say she’s not surprised because this was what their relationship is at this point. even if she told herself that she just wanted to get into school in order to get her mom off her back, her words only make it seem like she was mocking her even if she reached at least the minimum. it made mina wish her mother lowered her expectations or at least make her own higher. 

she eats her food in a hurry, hoping to get out of this dinner as soon as possible. of course, her mother has an issue with it as she glared at her from across the table. “slow down. you look like an animal eating like that.” 

mina ignores her and she manages to empty her bowl, still trying to bite and swallow the leftover food in her mouth. she quickly stands up from her chair, puts her bowl and utensils in the sink, and runs upstairs, swallowing the last bit of her food down. she closes her door behind her even if she knows her mother was going to go up to her room anyways. when she hears the door open, she rolls her eyes before she turns to her mom. 

“can you knock?” the impatient tone was one she’s used frequently enough. whether or not she was proud of it, she kept that information to herself. 

her mother’s not afraid of it, though. in fact, if anything, she’s probably a professional at dealing with it. “you’re one to talk about manners,” she scolds. “what is with you?! at least try to stay for the entire dinner and not make it seem like you don’t like my company.” 

“why would i do that?” mina scoffs. “you’d yell at me for faking it, anyway.” 

her mom sighs. “why are you so selfish? why do you keep on doing this? do you understand how uncomfortable your father feels whenever we fight? how uncomfortable i feel?!” 

“i’m sorry for being upset over you not being a good mom,” she responds, crossing her arms as if to do the bare minimum of making fun of the woman in front of her who would do the same in their past arguments. “i got into a good school and all you can say is ‘i’m surprised they didn’t reject you straight up’? no ‘congratulations’ or ‘i’m happy you got into the school you wanted to get into’? shouldn’t you at least be glad over the fact that i’m going-” 

“how am i going to explain to the family that it took a few months for my daughter to tell me she got into snu after a few months since she applied?” her mom interrupts her, angering mina even more. “it didn’t take long for jaebeom to get his letter of acceptance. it didn’t take daniel long for him to know if he got in. do you know what they’ll say when i tell them you got accepted after countless times of me saying ‘oh i don’t know yet’, ‘she hasn’t received anything yet’? they’ll think i’m raising-” 

“what? an idiot?” mina laughs. “yeah. i’m sure everyone in the family’s already aware of the fact that i’m never going to be a lawyer living in america. at least i got into a school.” 

her mother then points at mina and she has to hold the urge to not swat the hand away from her face. “look at you! you’re already making yourself sound bad by acting like it’s a miracle they accepted you in the first place!” she criticizes. “you’re supposed to go to school. you’re supposed to get a degree in order to get a good job somewhere. after all your father and i’ve done for you and your brothers, why are you the only one who treats this like it’s not a big deal?!” 

“i am treating this like it’s a big deal!” mina asserts. “do you know how many nights i spent studying for tests that i knew i was going to fail? all the times i had to stay after school in order to make sure it wouldn’t affect my chances?! i worked so hard in the last few months to be accepted and i’m the only one in this room proud of myself for it! it’s like you’re actively trying to find reasons to be disappointed in me, even when i do something good!”

“maybe you should be trying to not constantly disappoint me, then.” her mother turns her back to her daughter and makes way for the door, but mina mutters something else that makes her stop in her steps.

“the one time i do something that i thought could impress you and you’re still disappointed in me.”

her mother doesn’t respond. all she does is stand for a moment before she leaves, not even bothering to close the door behind her. 

[sapphirescales]

LILY!!! do you have skincare tips? i've got oily skin and i'm looking for things i can do when my Depression makes it hard to maintain a routine :(

UMMMM well idk like,,, my skin isnt all that great either esp when The Stress hits but i’ll jot down some stuff tht i can think of, but i’ll preface it w my skin is combination skin -- i’ve got a rly oily t-zone and then the rest of my face (esp my cheeks) are a little dry so i guess my skin tends to be more oily than anything, and my skin is SUPER SENSITIVE, but anyway

for facewashes and face creams: use gel stuff instead of foam or cream stuff! i switched my foam cleanser for a gel cleanser, and my moisturiser cream for a moisturiser gel and it helped so much. gel stuff tends to be a lil bit more expensive but it’s worth it imho. also try and get stuff which are parabens-free, bc stuff w parabens in it usually makes my acne go Mad. some stuff i’ve used/stuff i know about: sugar’s cucumber face wash gel, clinelle’s hydracalm facewash gel & hydracalm moisturiser, st ives’ green tea cleanser, origins’ make a difference plus+ rejuvenating cream (a gel moisturiser & a lil high-end aka super pricet), the face shop’s jeju aloe gel (there’s a huge tub sold here for like rm22 something something and honestly aloe gel is so cooling and soothing). i’ve also heard some really great stuff about origins’ oil cleanser (and oil cleansers in general) but i haven’t used it personally.

get urself a good toner! again, try and stay away from parabens-containing products but investing in a good toner will help your products sink in better and also help with regards to oil control. i’m using origins’ mega-bright skin illuminating treatment lotion, from their dr andrew weil line, and idk of many toners that are parabens free, so if you know any feel free 2 add to the comments i guess

your diet tends to reflect on your face. i dont eat v healthy tbh but i find that if i take a lot of dairy products, my acne tends to get worse. try and see if there are similar food products for you -- i know my cousins have issues with lots of processed food. not to say Cut It Out Entirely but reducing/cutting back can really help. my skin is also v v oily if i don’t drink enough water and get in enough greens, so i try to do that as often as i can. keep some water next to where you’re working or using your laptop, use a cool mason jar or water bottle or sippy cup or WHATEVER tbh as long as it makes you actually drink water and keep yourself hydrated

use a nice scrub or an alternative to a scrub: i use st ives’ green tea scrub (which is also parabens free and v affordable imo) and i also bought a tiny lil silicone sponge from watson’s which is like rm22 or something? and i use that with my gel cleanser. but the goal is to really gently exfoliate your skin without irritating it or drying it out. bc the sponge is made of silicone, it lasts FOREVER as well and you’ll see a difference in the texture of your skin in no time. making sure less dead cells are on your skin also helps w my oil production idk why??? but it Does so sdlfkj

face care with make-up is so, so important. use a primer or a pore filler before you put on make-up -- not only will it help your make-up stay on for longer but it also stops make-up getting INTO your pores and making your skin situation worse. afterwards, i usually wipe off my make-up with a (i know u guys are sick of this by now) parabens-free or a really gentle make-up wipe (like one from simple), and then i go back in with micellar water or baby oil in order to really clear out my pores. i use a quick scrub, tone and moisturise. wearing make-up often makes my skin oilier sometimes bc my make-up (which is mattifying bc oily t-zone) dries my skin out and then makes it overproduce oil again later, so if i don’t gotta use make-up, i try not to / minimise how much make-up i use (e.g. just using it for under-eye concealing or concealing acne scars/major acne)

on that note, if you don’t gotta use a cleanser, don’t? like i know most ppl are gonna scream but honestly if you were just at home all day and didn’t go anywhere or do anything to your skin, just splash on some micellar water to clear off the products off your skin from the day before/last night and you’re going to be fine??? super easy, zero fuss.

also, if youre wearing make-up, and youve got oily skin/oily areas, youre gonna have to be a lil aware sometimes and like. dab at your face w a sponge or a tissue v gently to wipe off the oil. setting your face with a powder really helps, and you don’t ACTUALLY need to put the same amount of make-up and foundation over your whole face. so, for e.g., my nose doesn’t need as much coverage and its Super Oily, so i don’t apply as much product there compared to like my forehead or my cheeks (where my acne scarring is most prominent), which really helps. if you have a good foundation and powder that closely matches your skintone and your undertone, you can probably get away w this a lot easier. 

CHANGE YOUR MAKE-UP BRUSHES AND SPONGES OFTEN! like please. PLEASE. i know we all Love to build up and are Lazy As Hell but then maybe invest in some disposable sponges or something bc for the sake of hygiene. please.

USE SUNSCREEN. idc if youre lightskinned or darkskinned, USE SUNSCREEN. even if youre medium-dark skinned, youre not gonna be immune to skin cancer. harsh sunlight also makes your skintone uneven and usually makes my skin overproduce oil. i really like biore’s sunscream stuff bc it’s very light, there’s a non-scented option and it also doubles as a make-up base (they have a few so you gotta have a look through). 

FACE MASKS! i also struggle w The Depression and its really tough for me to maintain an immaculate skincare routine, so rather than investing in like 16 tubs of facemasks i have 1 tube of clay mask (mine is from origins bc i bought this a Long While Ago while i still had money, but any clay mask is good!) and then i bought a WHOLE BUNCH of sheet face masks from the face shop because ... you guessed it ... they’re parabens free! and super cheap! using a hot compress before the mask helps bc your pores open up! i usually make myself a nice mug of tea and switch my a/c on and then slap that facemask on and do some replies. but try and do a facemask at least once every two weeks. i use mine once a week to once every two weeks, depending on how bad my depression is. target the facemask you choose to the particular problems your skin has; mine are usually hydrating facemasks (bc hydration!!! and really hydrating your skin goes a LONG WAY wrt to oil control) but i also have a few firming and brightening ones bc my skin can feel a little dull sometimes. ALSO, clay masks get a Lot Of Shit so i’m gonna just tell you quickly -- YES, they do make your skin break out the first few times you use it, but over time, it will REALLY HELP trust me! your pores? minimised. your skin? clear and glowing. your oil? controlled. if your skin is super sensitive and does not react well to store-bought masks, feel free to make some of your own natural ones! i really love making a maduka honey mask -- if you add sugar to it, it becomes a mask that also doubles as a scrub. a natural yoghurt mask is also a BLESSING and adding some oats to it also makes it double as a scrub. you could use natural aloe or use tomatoes and throw some sugar in them. PLEASE DON’T USE COCONUT OIL AS A MASK IT WILL CLOG YOUR PORES!!! don’t use masks that hurt bc you peel them etc because i always find tht it makes my skin immediately produce way more oil than it needs to compensate or smth lmao so NO to charcoal masks and stuff like that.

try and use something different for day and night. super tough esp if youre (like me) super lazy to do shit but during the day, i usually use an aloe vera gel moisturiser and, at night, i use bio oil to hydrate, minimise pores and also help with acne scarring, and tea tree oil gel to target acne-prone areas on my face and help combat acne before it starts up. find something that works for you!!!

a lot of skincare is trial and error, trying to find what works for YOU personally might not be something that works for others; i rarely get cystic acne, for example, so my skincare routine doesn’t really target that and so some parts might not work as well for people who do have cystic acne (esp since i often hear that clay masks really fuck up ppl who have cystic acne which makes sense bc in the beginning clay masks make acne worse before it gets better). try some stuff out and see what works for you after a month or so of a trial period.

skincare takes time! i don’t mean in the obvious way like you need to take time out of your day to do stuff, but i mean, it takes TIME for the results to show. you’ll have to do stuff now bc it’ll pay off later. it’ll be rough when you’re trying new stuff in the beginning but it might work out for you over a longer period of time. don’t switch products and stuff TOO OFTEN bc it’ll screw up your skin more.

it’s okay if you miss things or don’t do your routine every single day or just Can’t. it’s okay. it’s just skin care, and skipping a day or two won’t really make A Huge Difference. you can continue tomorrow. 

i hope some of this helps? idk this is just what’s worked for me over the years but yeah. feel free 2 add comments as necessary. :*

[intoxicatingswift]

the 1:

God the line if my wishes came true it would've been you OK THAT HIT

this feels like a iftye but like folklore version

UGH THE BRIDGE ACTUALLY HIT why was this my exact mood yesterday I already called it I knew I needed this album

cardigan:

can i just say im here for taylors lower tone

A FRIEND TO ALL IS A FRIEND TO NONE ok facts

the Peter losing Wendy line really got me cuz that used to be a thing w me n some1 *cries*

chasing shadows in the grocery line nooo

this is like an other side of the door but folkmore IDK IT JUST REMINDS ME OF IT

the last great american dynasty:

god i had to restart it 3 times my fam r so noisy pls.

i really feel like the stripped back style of production really allows taylors lyrics and storytelling within songs to shine. like ive got the maddest mental images of screaming matches between Rebecca and bills family and small town style rumours passing from someone to another

mental music video basically and also u can see the strength of rebecca which is only paralleled by smth ive experienced from books/TV? imagine the skill it takes to tell such a story in a few minutes that people see in 358 pages or 12 1hr installations

EXILE YES BON IVER:

can u tell im excited for this one

ughhh his harmonies are always *chef's kiss*

side note this rly is pushing me and giving me a better sense of identity for the sort of music I want to make thank u Taylor 🥺

god taylor urs and bon ivers voices go together so beautifully u both know how to make a harmony so good

the metaphors are so.... UGH I LOVE

my tears ricochet:

im in love with the vocalising in the intro omg

if I'm on fire you'll be made of ashes too yes hunger games let's go (no for real I just re read it and loved it again so)

ok no the lyrics on this one just HIT me particularly even tho I'm gonna say that on every song OK

I feel like theres a lwymmd ref in here 😶

the line I didn't have it in myself to go with grace spoke to me like i feel like that was extracted directly from my brain

still can't believe we actually got a whole album wth

mirrorball:

MIRRORBALL U COUNTRY BEAUTY

this song just feels like calm vibes as a blanket, stolen kisses

bro.... i literally wrote half a song with the lyrics that have the same gist of the bridge the whole idea of the circus no longer existing and yet u still feel like u have to perform for that one person cause u need to prove that they made the wrong choice leaving i

seven:

God her voice is hauntingly beautiful here

and though I can't recall your face I still got love for you what a beautiful way to express that you're always loved by someone even if you're no longer close, you live in memories and that's 100% enough and you're enough

THE ENTIRE SECOND VERSE IS ME AND MY FRIENDS AS TEENAGERS? God that hurt especially bc the sentiment of my prev things applies to those same people

SHOUT OUT TO INDIA TAYLOR I FEEL SO SEEN RN LMAO

august:

ahhhhh we had cruel summer and now we have august

"lost in the memory" is one of my favourite lyrics anyway and now taylors used it i

did taylor find out like the story of my life 2016- present bc like this seriously hits the "you were never mine" and the emphasis on August i

OK THE BRIDGE WAS MEEEEEE OH MY GOD how do i write my shitty album when this *gestures to entire folklore aggressively* exists.

oh the outro :( whoever said this is taylors melodrama was onto smth fr

this is me trying:

just looking at the lyrics is this ootw; the next chapter 👁️👄👁️

this is so beautifully sad

you're a flashback in a film reel on the one screen in my town okkkkkkkkkkk wow 🥺

illicit affairs:

why do i feel like this is joe and tays story post met gala👁️

YOU SHOWED ME COLOURS IS SUCH A METAPHORICALLY DEEP AND BEAUTIFUL LINE HI OOTW REFERENCE

invisible string omg OK I claimed this one pre listen:

oh crap the colour references already spoke to me bc long ago I had a concept to link songs to colours

also the idea of storybook romance as well with the "used to think I'd meet somebody there"

i love the invisible string theory also oh my god

BAD BLOOD OMG this is such a random detail abt how Joe heard bad blood the first time he was in LA and I love it

LMAO not taylor getting recognised on their anniversary trip 😭

also can i just say the plucking strings keeping the same rhythm/volume the way through somehow contributes to the invisible string theory i loooooveeeeee the lyric/music matching here (did i just somehow compare this to vq matching? think so ok maybe there's hope for me as a medic yet 💀)

taylor rly said fuck adam tom and whoever else Joe is it

OK THE REFERENCES TO GOLD HI DWOHT

ALSO PURPLE PINK SKIES HELLO INTHAF AKA MY STAN SONG WHICH EVERYONE SLEEPS ON

safe to say i made a correct choice stanning this song pre listen ahahaah

mad woman:

the chords on this i am in love, the chaos of the string instruments yessss

here for the strength lol

this is i did something bad but quiet scary angry version

CALLED IT HELLO IDSB REFERENCE

ugh the delicacy in how the words are pronounced in the second chorus shows how hurt and strong u can be simultaneously

mirrored ofc by the soft piano and percussion of hand claps ugh taylor im so happy u made this album

epiphany:

im getting let it all go vibes from this also bon iver

oh it's coronavirus :( yeah

side note wear a mask this seriously was unprecedented and ik at my work (icu) while I was FT we had a couple boxes of antiviral ppe and I did a shift just as things got bad here and it was all completely gone. at the time we'd only had a couple query covid cases so pls. WEAR A MASK ESP U LOT ON THE TUBE/TFL RAIL

i feel like this song reflects how slow the pain can be when ur losing someone like literally watching their breaths slow and also the emotional pain.

betty:

omg this is one of the teenager love story three aaahhhhh it's so cute BUT I SERIOUSLY REMEMBER THE TEENAGE ANGST oh man i Really do

also hello country tay

ugh all ur stupid friends it seriously sounds like 17 year old boy 😭

peace:

LOVE THAT GUITAR RIFF YES AM SO HERE FOR THAT

I made good choices in the songs I chose pre listen all of this is literal poetry and I'm so glad I can focus on the lyrics more because of the production yes i know I already said that

DREAMSCAPES I LOVE THAT WORD I WAS JUST THINKING I NEED TO INCORPORATE IT INTO A SONG

the i-i-id in I'd swing with you for the fences, the delicacy in "give you a child"

now I see your brother as my brother hello paper rings reference (it's not even but yall know)

the rain (paps/media) can well and truly fuck off

"would it be enough if I could never give you peace" actual poetry.

hoax:

i love the dainty piano ugh that HIGH night

the octave differences on the chorus

don't want no other shade of blue hello paper rings

OK this one has a lot to unpack tbh i probably will pore over this like the English poetry i missed out on by choosing stem

also fuck kimberly lmao

[tbhstudying1]

hellO it's glossier anon again and thanks so much for the tips <3 i'm also looking to get some products from other skincare/makeup brands so!! what are your favorite brands + products? thanks so much <333

y’all im DESPONDENT bc i spent AGES writing a good reply and then MY LAPTOP SHUT DOWN BC OF BATTERY AND THE ASK DIDN’T SAVE :(((( anyhow, here is my very long response under the cut! 

im listing everything that i’ve used / have bc some of the things that didn’t work for me might work for you! do keep in mind that i’m still relatively new to skincare / beauty ;; hope this helps anyways!

if y’all have any beauty / skincare recommendations for me, send me an ask with the name of the product! i get rly excited abt this kind of stuff haha

skincare

my main skin problems: dryness, redness, uneven texture my skin type: dry, ultra sensitive

the ordinary niacinamide serum

got this for redness, broke me out instead

okay, idk if this was the product that broke me out bc i did experience a lot of heat rash during that time and i didn’t patch test BUT im too scared to test this :(

side note: i develop rashes and redness when i’m exposed to too much heat or sun :(((((( 

would not buy again

the ordinary hyaluronic acid serum

i rly haven’t noticed anything or any changes but hey ? at least it doesn’t break me out ?

i’ve noticed that it’s really sticky when it dries down which i do not like……

would not buy again

holika holika aloe vera gel

i bought this bc 1. my aloe vera plant was running out of leaves and 2. i read a post that said the nature republic gel had alcohol in it. also, the packaging is cuter HAHAHA

i primarily use aloe vera gel to soothe the redness and heat rash and sunburn i get :( i also use to help heal acne scars.

i found that fresh aloe vera gel works better but this is good in a pinch

would buy again

thayer’s witch hazel rose water toner

it smells rly rly rly good !!!! also it’s quite affordable considering how much product you get in a single bottle. it’s lasted me so so long and a friend told me zendaya uses it too hahaha

i haven’t noticed any real change ? i think folks with oily skin might rly benefit from this too but hey !! it didn’t break my skin out

would buy again but i wanna experiment with more toners

cetaphil facial cleanser and lotion

my HOLY GRAIL of ALL skincare bc it’s gentle and doesn’t break me out and keeps my skin soft and GOD i would DIE for cetaphil 

i’ve been religiously using cetaphil after i had this horrible skin experience as a child. my doctor was like “hey you should use cetaphil” and ever since then, my skin has been calmer

definitely !!! would buy !!! again!!!!!!

cosrx good morning gel cleanser

god im so despondent whenever i think about this one

everyone !! loves this !!! but !!! it left my skin feeling stripped and kinda broke me out. i think it’s the tea tree oil that i’m sensitive to? but god i just wanted to love this so much more than i actually did…….

would not buy again

cosrx acne patches

cosrx redeems itself in my eyes with THESE MAGIC PATCHES

slap one on your pimple when it comes to a head and it’ll draw all the gunk out

notes: make sure to keep it on for as long as possible, pimples may take more than one patch to get everything out, and don’t apply when your skin is still wet / damp or else it won’t stick as well

would buy again

naive peach facial cleanser

im a weak bitch for anything peach scented. everyone who knows me can confirm.

unfortunately, this cleanser left my skin feeling stripped. it didn’t break me out though. folks with oily skin might like this better ?? it smells SO SO GOOD THOUGH

would not buy again

innisfree peach hand lotion

it !!!!! smells so good!! and like i said!!!! im a weak ass bitch for peach-scented things!!!! leaves my hands feeling so soft!!!

would buy again

beauty

im a n00b at beauty makeup stuff HAHAHHA also the reason why i have so much colourpop stuff is purely bc i only buy during sales and i get literally everything for at least half the price + free shipping DSJKJDSKJK

colourpop double entendre eyeshadow palette

affordable esp since i got it during a sale + free shipping

note: if you wanna buy anything from colourpop, wait until there’s a sale

good mix of mattes and shimmers, good shades for natural makeup

i don’t rly know how to use or apply makeup so im too much of a Coward to buy eyeshadows with bright shades and whatever. this was a rly nice palette to buy + i can do looks that im more comfy with :”) i lov me some good browns and coppers :”)

colourpop blotted lippies (bee’s knees, on a stick, candyfloss)

like all colourpop lipstick products, do not use if your lips are chapped. every flake of dry skin will show :(

bee’s knees is my fav

i prefer more natural and vibrant pink/red shades

on a stick is too coral, candyfloss is too nude

colourpop ultra blotted lip (zuma)

too matte and nude for my tastes, but it applied very nicely and didn’t budge when it dried down

dw dw it takes some time to dry so you can fix mistakes if necessary

i think it looks good on my lips after blotting once tho

colourpop super shock shadows

god i wanted to like these and i impulsively bought a whole bunch of shimmery ones but i hate all of them

i prefer applying eyeshadow with brushes and it’s harder to do that with these. also, the ones i bought are way too shimmery for me

i have too many and i’ve literally only used them once for tests on my wrist. idk what to do with these anymore.

at least i got these for less than half the price and with free shipping during a sale

colourpop super shock highlighter (wisp)

this highlighter!!! i love it!!! it matches well with my skin tone and i bought it after amy vagabond recommended it for asian skin tones. it’s not super obvious and extra bright, but you can definitely build it up to that blindingly bright highlight if you want to. i use it mostly as a natural-looking highlight

physician’s formula liquid eyeliner

i recently got this from the drugstore bc i wanted a dupe for kat von d tattoo liner + i heard that this was a pretty close one. i like it but i haven’t used it enough to give you a solid opinion on it

maybelline volumizing mascara

god there are so many different versions of these…. i just picked the dark blue non-waterproof one and went with it bc they all sound the same DJSKSDJK

fyi: i hate waterproof mascaras bc they take forever to remove and i suck at removing mascara and it drives me nuts!!

but hell yeah they give you VOLUME

they do have fallout :(((( i have to check in the mirror every couple of hours to swipe away flakes of dried mascara but THE VOLUME !!

laura mercier translucent setting powder

listen, this stuff is $$$ compared to everything else on this list, but i borrow it from my mum HAHAHA

it rly is a nice powder though! no flashback, no weird white cast, and blends in seamlessly with my bb cream / foundation

maybelline bb cream (the one with pink letters in medium)

eh, it’s just bb cream

i’ve got no solid opinion on it since i use the glossier one more frequently. it’s thicker and more coverage, but the glossier one is easier to spread over the face purely bc of its thinner consistency. im a lazy girl who wakes up late so any makeup (if any) has to be quick and on the go

i’ll probably use this one more once i run out of the glossier one

l’oreal bb cream (medium)

god i hate this so much

it’s supposed to have little balls of pigment that pop and add color to the cream but it just turns out to be inconsistent and weird. 

things that are coming soon / in the process of testing

benton snail bee essence

laneige water sleeping mask

hada-labo goku-jyun hyaluronic lotion

banila co clean it zero cleansing balm

skinfood sheet mask

things that i want

canmake mermaid spf gel

fenty beauty lip gloss

moonshot cushion

too faced palette (not bc of the colors, just bc of the peach scent)

son & park beauty water

etude house sunprise sun milk

peripera lip tint

3ce foundation

from for the dreams i want to catch https://ift.tt/2OMDnx0 via See More

[tbhstudying]

hellO it's glossier anon again and thanks so much for the tips

y’all im DESPONDENT bc i spent AGES writing a good reply and then MY LAPTOP SHUT DOWN BC OF BATTERY AND THE ASK DIDN’T SAVE :(((( anyhow, here is my very long response under the cut! 

im listing everything that i’ve used / have bc some of the things that didn’t work for me might work for you! do keep in mind that i’m still relatively new to skincare / beauty ;; hope this helps anyways!

if y’all have any beauty / skincare recommendations for me, send me an ask with the name of the product! i get rly excited abt this kind of stuff haha

skincare

my main skin problems: dryness, redness, uneven texturemy skin type: dry, ultra sensitive

the ordinary niacinamide serum

got this for redness, broke me out instead

okay, idk if this was the product that broke me out bc i did experience a lot of heat rash during that time and i didn’t patch test BUT im too scared to test this :(

side note: i develop rashes and redness when i’m exposed to too much heat or sun :(((((( 

would not buy again

the ordinary hyaluronic acid serum

i rly haven’t noticed anything or any changes but hey ? at least it doesn’t break me out ?

i’ve noticed that it’s really sticky when it dries down which i do not like......

would not buy again

holika holika aloe vera gel

i bought this bc 1. my aloe vera plant was running out of leaves and 2. i read a post that said the nature republic gel had alcohol in it. also, the packaging is cuter HAHAHA

i primarily use aloe vera gel to soothe the redness and heat rash and sunburn i get :( i also use to help heal acne scars.

i found that fresh aloe vera gel works better but this is good in a pinch

would buy again

thayer’s witch hazel rose water toner

it smells rly rly rly good !!!! also it’s quite affordable considering how much product you get in a single bottle. it’s lasted me so so long and a friend told me zendaya uses it too hahaha

i haven’t noticed any real change ? i think folks with oily skin might rly benefit from this too but hey !! it didn’t break my skin out

would buy again but i wanna experiment with more toners

cetaphil facial cleanser and lotion

my HOLY GRAIL of ALL skincare bc it’s gentle and doesn’t break me out and keeps my skin soft and GOD i would DIE for cetaphil 

i’ve been religiously using cetaphil after i had this horrible skin experience as a child. my doctor was like “hey you should use cetaphil” and ever since then, my skin has been calmer

definitely !!! would buy !!! again!!!!!!

cosrx good morning gel cleanser

god im so despondent whenever i think about this one

everyone !! loves this !!! but !!! it left my skin feeling stripped and kinda broke me out. i think it’s the tea tree oil that i’m sensitive to? but god i just wanted to love this so much more than i actually did.......

would not buy again

cosrx acne patches

cosrx redeems itself in my eyes with THESE MAGIC PATCHES

slap one on your pimple when it comes to a head and it’ll draw all the gunk out

notes: make sure to keep it on for as long as possible, pimples may take more than one patch to get everything out, and don’t apply when your skin is still wet / damp or else it won’t stick as well

would buy again

naive peach facial cleanser

im a weak bitch for anything peach scented. everyone who knows me can confirm.

unfortunately, this cleanser left my skin feeling stripped. it didn’t break me out though. folks with oily skin might like this better ?? it smells SO SO GOOD THOUGH

would not buy again

innisfree peach hand lotion

it !!!!! smells so good!! and like i said!!!! im a weak ass bitch for peach-scented things!!!! leaves my hands feeling so soft!!!

would buy again

beauty

im a n00b at beauty makeup stuff HAHAHHA also the reason why i have so much colourpop stuff is purely bc i only buy during sales and i get literally everything for at least half the price + free shipping DSJKJDSKJK

colourpop double entendre eyeshadow palette

affordable esp since i got it during a sale + free shipping

note: if you wanna buy anything from colourpop, wait until there’s a sale

good mix of mattes and shimmers, good shades for natural makeup

i don’t rly know how to use or apply makeup so im too much of a Coward to buy eyeshadows with bright shades and whatever. this was a rly nice palette to buy + i can do looks that im more comfy with :”) i lov me some good browns and coppers :”)

colourpop blotted lippies (bee’s knees, on a stick, candyfloss)

like all colourpop lipstick products, do not use if your lips are chapped. every flake of dry skin will show :(

bee’s knees is my fav

i prefer more natural and vibrant pink/red shades

on a stick is too coral, candyfloss is too nude

colourpop ultra blotted lip (zuma)

too matte and nude for my tastes, but it applied very nicely and didn’t budge when it dried down

dw dw it takes some time to dry so you can fix mistakes if necessary

i think it looks good on my lips after blotting once tho

colourpop super shock shadows

god i wanted to like these and i impulsively bought a whole bunch of shimmery ones but i hate all of them

i prefer applying eyeshadow with brushes and it’s harder to do that with these. also, the ones i bought are way too shimmery for me

i have too many and i’ve literally only used them once for tests on my wrist. idk what to do with these anymore.

at least i got these for less than half the price and with free shipping during a sale

colourpop super shock highlighter (wisp)

this highlighter!!! i love it!!! it matches well with my skin tone and i bought it after amy vagabond recommended it for asian skin tones. it’s not super obvious and extra bright, but you can definitely build it up to that blindingly bright highlight if you want to. i use it mostly as a natural-looking highlight

physician’s formula liquid eyeliner

i recently got this from the drugstore bc i wanted a dupe for kat von d tattoo liner + i heard that this was a pretty close one. i like it but i haven’t used it enough to give you a solid opinion on it

maybelline volumizing mascara

god there are so many different versions of these.... i just picked the dark blue non-waterproof one and went with it bc they all sound the same DJSKSDJK

fyi: i hate waterproof mascaras bc they take forever to remove and i suck at removing mascara and it drives me nuts!!

but hell yeah they give you VOLUME

they do have fallout :(((( i have to check in the mirror every couple of hours to swipe away flakes of dried mascara but THE VOLUME !!

laura mercier translucent setting powder

listen, this stuff is $$$ compared to everything else on this list, but i borrow it from my mum HAHAHA

it rly is a nice powder though! no flashback, no weird white cast, and blends in seamlessly with my bb cream / foundation

maybelline bb cream (the one with pink letters in medium)

eh, it’s just bb cream

i’ve got no solid opinion on it since i use the glossier one more frequently. it’s thicker and more coverage, but the glossier one is easier to spread over the face purely bc of its thinner consistency. im a lazy girl who wakes up late so any makeup (if any) has to be quick and on the go

i’ll probably use this one more once i run out of the glossier one

l’oreal bb cream (medium)

god i hate this so much

it’s supposed to have little balls of pigment that pop and add color to the cream but it just turns out to be inconsistent and weird. 

things that are coming soon / in the process of testing

benton snail bee essence

laneige water sleeping mask

hada-labo goku-jyun hyaluronic lotion

banila co clean it zero cleansing balm

skinfood sheet mask

things that i want

canmake mermaid spf gel

fenty beauty lip gloss

moonshot cushion

too faced palette (not bc of the colors, just bc of the peach scent)

son & park beauty water

etude house sunprise sun milk

peripera lip tint

3ce foundation

[yumenosakiacademy]

Me.trocon 2017 Friday

this is a Diary entry for future me, but feel free to read, as always. Cosplayed: Mik.an Tsumiki

Okay, so i woke up early to get there by 10 am, ate 3 bowls of cereal n dad helped me w my wig n the bandages n stuff then i went to the con and made it there at abt 9:40 am..? around then, and went downstairs to look around before going to the ouran or hs panel so i spotted the nice Ann from earlier along with a futaba that they were friends w and i hung out w them for a while talking abt stuff and tried spinning a spinner for the first time?? rly hard w nails tho so i gave up and gave it back to them and i heard “hey nurse!!” and turned around and a ruruka and komaeda w a big monob.ear plushie were riding down the escalator waving at me and i got a pic of them and they took a pic of me and ruruka gave me a gummy candy but i had to return it bc i dont eat gelatin but they were nice! i saw em a few times later too. so i told ann and futaba that i was gonna go to the hs panel and said goosbye 

and i went to the hs panel and it.. wasnt too fun?? idk it was just a small panel. they were eating ben boozled beans to see if they got the good or gross flavor and i asked nepeta what her favorite kind of cat was and terezi tried to rap and gamzee did shenanigans but after a while i wanted to see some of he ouran panel so i went in there but not much was happening so i stuck around then eventually left it bc i was kinda bored

and then!! the LL pep rally aa! it was major cute, and all of the dancers were amazing and it had me having LL songs stuck in my head esp the nico and nozo duet song aa and while they were dancing i think i almost teared up bc i started having Idol Feelings?? flrhknrfhb but ANYWAY the maki, after asked, mentioned en.stars but she didnt kno how to play + she ddnt wanna read a japanese walkthrough and u could literally see me STRAINING not to tell her i could teach her how and i couldnt after the panel but oh well! the panel was rly cute n fun aa and there was a halloween!yohane w a rly nice outfit and after taking her pic i was like “im ur fallen angel now, yohane-sama!” and she was like “yes you are one w me now or somefin it was cute!

After that, i forgot that there was an SU panel and i went to the ON.S panel and some of the jokes were funny but since im not major into o.ns (never was, altho ive seen seasons 1 and 2 and read some of the manga) i eventualy left bc i got kinda bored and they startedplaying games like “Honey i love u” (and a friend later told me that the panel got boring after that) and bc i heard there was a DR meetup going on, i decided to go since i had 30 minutes before the max mitt.elman q and a but most of the cosplayers were just standing around and talking waiting for a photographer and a juzo was rly nice to me and so was the mondo (who seemed to be running the meetup) but by the time they got a photographer, it was time for me to go and mondo’s like “u joinin for pics?” bc i was standing off to the side looking at the con map n i was like “ah.. no, the voice of ryuji is here n i wanna see him” so the mondo said they were gonna be morgana at the per.sona photoshoot on satuday and that max might be there and im so SAD that i cant go to it bc its at midnight aa..

but so i left and i went to go see max mit.telman and it’s! surreal seeing a celebrity and everytime he spoke all i heard was Ryuji honestly thats what i thought of almost everytime fhnkhn but a lot of the talk in that panel was abt voice acting or spi.derman but i managed to aask him a question abt per.sona (”whats ur favorite castle and character?”) and he said kamoshidas palace bc ryuji’s awakening is in there and that ryuji was his fav n when i said Of Course he said “oh, other than ryuji? hmm.. the subway announcer” and everyone laughed and i think someone else asked him abt per.sona before me and it was like.. what was the funniest ryuji line to do and max said “the line where hes eating and he goes ‘IT’S LIKE A MEATY EXPLOSION IN MY MOUTH!!’” and i was laughing aaa but it was so cool! but i left near the end of it and went to the DR panel at 1:30

and the DR panel was kinda boring, i stood in the back bc there were tall ppl sitting near the places i like to sit and stuff but hey did lil games and i asked mono.kuma “what his fvorite exocution was (”h-hopefully not mine!”) and he said terut.eru’s w the helicoptors and they had trivia but the only question i knew i dint raise my hand fast enough unfortunately but its okay and later in the panel i asked junko how she really felt abt mikan (and called her junko-sama aaa) and junko said “well.. i kill the people i love so.. haha!” but made a heart w her arms and i made a heart w my fingers

NOW FOR MY FAVORITE PART OF TODAY there was a dm.md dating panel and i was like “hhh clear is best boy im gonna wait until clear is called then take a seat as a contestant” so the panel was funny and virus was all like “how do you feel abt exotic pets” and contestant one was like “well i do love bigass snakes” and virus is like “oh yea? well i have 2~” n koujaku mentioned something like theyll have to be a snake charmer and one lady, when virus asked why he should choose them, she said her character (Foxxy) once put chicken up herself and it came out fried and her friend, who was #2, said “I CANT COMPARE WHEN HER P**** DOUBLES AS A MICROWAVE!” and the other girl went “easy bake oven” and everyone was laughing and #2 couldnt stop laughing and it was Wild tbh ekhrhflj AND THEN when they called cleae you could see me stand up SO EFFING QUICK AA and i sat down as contestant 3 and as i sat down i was like “aa i was waiting for clear hes my best boy” and clear (and kou i think) heard me and went “oh aww” and clear asked his first question of “what do you think of jellyfish” and #1 said they’re squishy, #2 said they’re pretty yet kind of delicious, and i said “they’re pretty and floaty.. and theyre soft- well, they look soft, yanno? and they’re swimming all free.. w how theyre floating, maybe theyre secretly fairies or something?” and everybody Aww’ed aaa and then clear asked his 2nd question “where you take me on a date?” and #2 said the obv answer of aquarium, #1 said a beach at sunset i think, and i thought for a sec abt how clear is soft ans sweet and said “i think something simple, like a sleepover, and we could have glow in the dark stars on the wall n all yanno, and maybe watch a movie w a pillow fort and lots of plushies?” and everybody Aww’ed harder and i just kinda shyly smiled and i heard the panelists Awwing too and koujaku turned to clear and said “so, do you need to ask a third question or do you obv already know who ur gonna pick” w an Obvious tone and clear nodded (rly cutely aa) and walked down n he was like “would you.. do me the honors of being my chosen one?” and holding out my bouquiet (which was what the winning contestant got) and i was smiling so hard and nodded (i think we hugged too?) and i said “only if i have the honor of giving you a lollipop, clear~!” and gave him a fake shot and a lollipop and i was like “if you need a different flavor u can have a diff. one aa” and clear was like “ah oh no that’s fine!” and koujaku was like “oh my god can we have her instead of these guys” (meaning the other dm.md panelists) and  was fidgeting back to my seat in jy and slight shyness but after that i asked clear 2 questions during the q and a and i asked if he would make his brothers Good and not on the side of toue if he could and he nodded yes and one of the panelists played jellyf.ish song and i was like aa and then later i said “um.. clear.. i think you’re kinda similar to that one robot.ic pokemon princess- um, i forgot her name bc of my memory but-” and clear was nodding and blushing and i was like aaa bc we’re both Shy so it’s just us both being nice and blushy and i couldnt hear it well but i think clear was like “we should see it later” and after the panel was over i was gathering my bag and the clear came up to me and they were like aa you’re so cute can i take a pic of you” and i was like “yea sure can i take a pic of you?” and so we talked abt how neither of us have seen the pok.emon movir i was talking abt yet and i gave clear a hug and they were so cute im gonna Cry aa... im Lov............

after that i walked around the dealers room and the female hajime from earlier that i saw at the meetup and at the DR panel asked me to pose w them and since they got a bouqiet from the dm.md panel too we posed w those like a marriage proposal and i was like “take that spike ch.unsoft we’re making DR Gay now” and we stood around and talked abt per.sona until i saw a ryuji and goro and hajime and i took pics of em and we talked w them for a sec (the goro was like “nobody likes goro they all want pics of just ryuji”) and they were Nice and i saw dm.md cosplayers that i saw at the panel in the dealers room and they kept complimenting me on how cute i was during the panel aaa AND i met the virus and trip who were in the panel and they complimented me too and we stood around and talked for a while and i was like  “is virus’ jacket green bc he’s Poisonous?” and they were like “..interesting though. maynbe! :o” and i was like “and trip is piink for sweets, virus is green bc of snakes maybe? and trip’s pink could be a lion tongue?” and i gave them both lollipops + fake shots (i was like “maybe oit’s heroine. OH or maybe i shot you up w... Morphine” and we all went aaayyye) and i left

the oso.matsu-kun ppl never showed up so ikept browsing the dealers room and while i was looking at en.stars blind boxes, i saw a naegi going thru the id.olish omanjuus but i thought they were en.stars ones and i went “omg are you an en.stars fan?!” and they were like “YEA are you??” and i was like “YAH” and so we talked abt the event and how he wants a wataru omanjuu even tho he kinda finda wataru weird and turns out hes a SwitchP and a rabitsP bc “he has self-care” and doesnt go close to Popular units and we talked for a while and he apparently didnt kno abt the en.stars panel on saturday so i told him abt it and led him to the idol merch booth n showed him the en.stars keychains and found atsumugi for him and he got a sora and some lady in a pink sweater (?) was looking thru the boxes too so i was like “ARE U INTO IT” n she was lieke “yea!” so we talked w her and shegot the shu christmas charm (i joked that it mustve been fate we met bc i got the mika one) and she said she likes valkyrie and she mentioned her artist alley booth has en.stars stuff (i couldnt fint eh booth) and that someone she knew was cosplaying mika (didnt fine em either) or maybe she said “was going to..?” but she said she was gonna go w a friend as leo and madara in vacation clothes on satuday n i was like “DUDE COOL” and naegi said he might cosplay nazuna at metro or just eventually and i was so happy aa but eventually i left the dealers room

the os.osan q and a wasnt much to talk abt so after that, the bn.ha q and a AND the bb dating panel were PACKED but i stood in the back of the bn.ha one for a while but thought abt leaving and dad called me so i took my chance to leave and answer him and after that i just walked around more and met an eg.gs benedict who hung out w me and we saw a nof.ace who gave them candy and we talked w an akira abt stuff before i left to walk again and after a while i met a Honoka and a Kamoshida and we talked abt en.stars and LL and aa it was fun they were Nice and i went to the mat.suno mixerfor the last half (i looked inside earlie, saw no one and didnt go inside but they apparently stated late) and got chosen to be a contestant for ichimatsu (which i found ironic bc i had already won a dating game today haha) (i was contestant #1, he couldnt see any of the contestant bc there was a rack between us) and ichimatsu asked “whats ur opinion on cats”and i said “well i love them!! and rin h.oshizora is my best LL girl so of course nya!” n for the 2nd question he said “my brothers r gonna hate me for this, but how submissive are you?” and i said “well.. technically i’m a switch, but i’m Mostly a bottom, ichimatsu-sama... And i mean.. i let junko-sama step on me so..” and some ppl laughed aa and for his third question he said “on a scale of 1-10 how much do you think im trash” so i decided not to say 10 or 11 and said “well i think you’re mosre like.. a recycling bin! nor fully trahsh, perse! but im p lazy too so we can be trash buddies together!” and in the end ichi said he liked #1 n #3 but #1 charmd him more so the rack was removed and i got a bouqiet of duct tape flowers from him and i said “i can be your kitty, ichimatsu-sama nya!” and he linked elbows w me and escorted me down the stage stairs and it was nice aaa..

after that was the pajama rw.by panel but it wasnt v interesting and some guy in he audience was loud and annoying and the LLpj party where i talked w the honoka and kamoshida from earlier and a different honoka and we talked for a sec abt en.stars and id.olish and the panel was okay but i was.. tired aa...

the DR panel turned out to be mostly party games not q and a and i was tired so i left midway thru once dad came to pick me up at like 11:30 and we got mcnuggets and a medium fry to share and!! con day overrr

[firebirdsdaughter]

01 made sure that I don't care one bit about characters that don't give a single f*ck about a traumatized victim of decade long abused. Horobi had nobody caring about him all this time, his own son offered him on a silver platter to the Ark, Aruto thinks yelling at him to snap out of the hacking will do. And then Aruto is sad over his pet AI being stupid and suddenly everyone is up in arms and ready to jump in and help him cheer up again. Give me a break.

… I will forever keep pre-ep 42 Fuwa safely in my heart. That guy out there isn’t my Fuwa. My Fuwa is safe. -_-

It’s very… Questionable.

Like. If anyone had tried to do anything help Horobi earlier, we wouldn’t be in this situation. It’d be so much less messy and destructive. It’d’ve been actual work, but, like. It would have literally been easier.

I’ve said before that I feel like they switched the cores of Horobi and Gai’s stories, and I super still feel that. Esp given the loss of episodes, they really should have stuck w/ having the Ark as the final villain, maybe have her take over Gai forcibly, I dunno. Maybe have Gai cause the situation? I know the point they’re trying to go for is that ‘HumaGear/AI can do bad to!’ (maybe?), but we had that w/ the Ark. Like… They could absolutely still have done Horobi struggling w/ getting free, him still having resentment towards humans, but having humans reach out and help him, prove their goodness by taking the time to reach out to the biggest victim who has been the most consumed by the Ark’s influence. Like, Horobi did wrong things under the Ark’s control. He’s been completely under her control and influence for decades. Like I just ranted about, he’s been conditioned, he literally doesn’t know how to handle emotions, or even what morals are. But humans should know better, esp ones who allegedly work w/ AI. Them defying the Ark’s claims and doctrine by reaching out to him and helping him, despite everything, would have been a great moment.

Like… I do understand Aruto being super upset about what happened. Despite the issues I have w/ how it was presented, he and Izu were close. Of course he’d be mad. What bothers me is the attitude that he’s the only victim who is behaving irrationally bc of grief and pain. The way all the stops are getting pulled out to ‘save him.’ I’d feel a lot more sympathetic towards him if I felt like they were recognising Horobi’s mental state at the same time. Like I went to in my giant ramble, Horobi didn’t seek out Izu and gun for her, she sought him out when he was already volatile and in an extremely high intensity situation, which had already been escalated (by humans), and continued pressuring him until he snapped.

Aruto being upset about her death is one thing. Like… Okay. They were close. I do give that. It’s the attitude that only Aruto is the tragic one here. This should at the least be treated as a double tragedy.

That’s why Raiden going to Horobi, however I think he went about it in a not really great way, was really powerful, esp compared w/ a lot of… Other out of character behaviour we saw in the ep.

Like. Just imagine if we’d had Fuwa recognising that his aggressive behaviour played a part in this (while I do have to admit that, after Okada’s explanation and seeing a more direct translation, it feels more like a blunder Fuwa would make if confronted w/ that situation, the fact that he was the only one Horobi asked, making it clear Horobi wanted to hear his answer, bc Horobi doesn’t ask, last him he did, he got tortured, only to be told ‘I’m here to destroy you’… Fuwa may not have meant it that way, but Horobi was not in a state where he’d be able to understand the nuance, and that def contributed to over-stressing him and then Izu’s pushing put him over the edge much easier), him recognising that and then trying to at least partially make it right, take a different approach, go to Horobi and try to back Raiden up on stuff. Like… How cool would that have been? Fuwa getting a moment of realising his reckless, angry, head-on style caused damage and contributed to this situation, so, bc he’s a human who can recognise that, he’s going to go to Horobi and address it. Fuwa allegedly learned that shooting first isn’t the best answer, it would have been really cool and effective to see him trying to take the time to impart that knowledge to someone else, to try and reel back and think and strategise. Maybe he could have tried to confront both of them.

(and then the other part of that scene… Was just… So painfully ooc…)

I mean, I know Aruto is the main character, but there’s a line between ‘this is the main character’ and… This. Like, if there was any clear recognition for Horobi’s suffering at all, this would have a different tone. One person’s suffering doesn’t make another person’s less. They could still focus on how Aruto is hurt while recognising what Horobi went through. But the fact that it’s to the point that they might have (I dunno, I heard this second hand, I don’t have any subs) only started trying to raise Jin to benefit Aruto, rather than focusing through reaching Horobi… Well, if that is the case, it very much gives the air of ‘oh, it’s all fine if we just ‘erase’ the human’s ‘crime!’’ And the idea that that would make Aruto killing Jin and Horobi having to watch him die ‘okay.’ It’s the same as not recognising Gai shooting Naki bc they ‘came back.’ The trauma is still there. Honestly, I half expect, if Izu gets brought back, the people would immediately be like ‘killing Jin (and Naki) wasn’t that bad bc they came back’ would immediately be like ‘oh poor Izu that must have been so traumatising for her.’

Okay, I’m being really harsh, I’m just really frustrated.

I really care about this series. Like, despite the fact that he can’t write character relationship development to save his life, Takahashi makes me fall in love w/ characters like no other. This cast has been such troopers, so stellar. I hold absolutely nothing against any of them. Igeta and Nakayama are legends and I’m proud of them.

I talk shit, but I know it’s just a tv show, I just get very emotional. And the fact is, Horobi (and esp his relationship w/ Fuwa) ended up becoming really important to me over the course of the show. HoroFuwa’s my first real… Well… It’s hard to explain, but they are like. My first ‘official’ otp. I’m not a big shipper, and I’ve struggled w/ the concept of romantic stuff in regards to my own identity in the past, I’ve always had a weird feeling of being ‘ashamed’ for thinking about that stuff. And it was HoroFuwa and a bloody kissing scene I wrote on new years that really just… It meant a lot to me, I feel like I became more comfortable w/ myself bc of them.

Which is totally not what you wanted on your Ask, sorry. ^^; I’m just trying to explain why I, personally, get so riled up. Ultimately, the show owes me nothing, I am nowhere near the target audience. But for someone whose depression often manifests as apathy… When I care, I care. So it’s… It’s been a ride. To say the least.

I’m sorry I went so off topic and personal. ^^’ Y’all didn’t come here for that, I know.