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#so real of u dazai-
benetnvsch · 9 months
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thx Dazai
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fivekrystalpetals · 2 years
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I find it really funny that Dazai has, if my memory serves me right, has swore only two times in the whole manga (he seldom swears even at his enemies, he an annoyingly polite boy) and both times coz of Fyodor... like this man made Dazai-annoy-everyone-around-me-to-death-Osamu go WTF at his antics
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I bet if Fyodor drops his mask of the perfectly-in-control mastermind and let loose, he's gonna be weirder than Dazai + Gogol combined. Sigma hasn't seen the worst of this gang yet...
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nyxi-pixie · 2 months
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me when im supposed to be studying but instead im thinking abt mori and dazai again
let me go absolutely insane for a second (not a second. this is so long. i just checked mfer its over 2000 words. i need to be sedated. imprisoned. restrained. examined. smthn)
'a young man with a death wish once came to me and i wanted to rescue him but i couldnt' and like yeah. beast mori couldnt rescue him. but to a certain extent, canon mori sort of has (touch wood for long term but as it is, dazai is so much less intent on dying than he was in dark era).
and it just. i always wonder about the actual intentions of the mimic situation. because on the surface, it looks like what dazai calls it, then deeper than that, it looks like a very calculated long term strategy, and deeper than that, its just. kinda sad.
i just think its interesting that he plans the mimic thing the way he does knowing dazai will leave despite the fact that he doesnt want him to. and dazai himself reasons this as mori being afraid of him, that mori doesnt want dazai to kill him the way mori killed the old boss. but thats? not true? mori seems unbothered at worst and downright proud at best when he tells oda that dazai will probably kill him one day.
so. Why. did he do it knowing dazai would leave? it wasnt his only option; he could have set skk on mimic. like 5 second future vision isnt gonna do much when the danger is alr there (as oda says). and in the face of a massive black hole coming right at u or a building being dropped on you, five seconds really isnt gonna do much. so mimic cld have been removed without a casualty and the mafia could still have got the permit, and not lost dazai. (who is Objectively an asset to the organisation.) But thats not how it happens. Mori plans it exactly as he does knowing oda will die and dazai will leave. he also then makes it continually obvious that dazai would be welcomed back.
and ive been trying to think of other reasons for it, but across canon and insight from beast mori the only thing i can think of comes back to the fact that mori wants dazai alive. alive and aware that the pm is the best place for him, but alive more than anything else.
i think he wants dazai as his heir bc he knows dazai is enough like him to manage it, but i wonder if it also comes back to the fact that mori is trying to rescue him, and i imagine his own reason to live (and lord knows he suggests he needs a strong one in fifteen) is probably tied down to legacy and responsibility for the city. mori devotes his life to the mafia because he wants peace and appreciates that control (rather than eradication) of the worst of yokohama is the way to keep that peace. and thats enough of a reason to live for him. but it isnt for dazai.
dazai doesnt give a fuck about the mafia as a concept bc his motivations dont rest on ideals the way moris do. dazai only ever does anything because of the people he cares about. everything we see him do, EVEN in pm era where people claim he was some emotionless rockman, come back to his friends.
its why hes never at the centre of the plot. he cant be, because he never does anything for himself. fifteen, in which he is a titular character, is a plot that rests vastly on chuuyas back story. dazais original motivation prior to meeting him is just to khs, and only upon meeting chuuya and them having their whole weird Thing and dazai deciding to be an obsessive freak, does he actually have personal stakes in the job. then in stormbringer, its all abt chuuya again, and dazai is only involved bc he cares about him (whatever he actually says aside). tdipud is driven by odas storyline, and so is dark era. dazai is only active in them bc he cares abt oda.
even when he has more idealistic motivations come canon era, they come back to the fact that hes doing it for oda. anything Above And Beyond that promise is bc hes acting to save the agency, who are his Friends. his motivations are deeply personal in complete contrast to moris, and it is perhaps the only place they really differ.
now ironically, it seems to be that the only decisions mori makes influenced by personal feelings are because of dazai. which takes me to the fact that i think he let dazai leave because he recognises thats whats best for him (at least in the short term - and we'll get to That in a second). and its not really a loss for the organisation because dazais too practical to ever dismiss the mafia, and he still gut responds with their methods. so its an easy sacrifice, a justifiable one.
then theres the contrast with the kouyou&kyouka thing. kouyou doesnt want kyouka to taste the light only to have it sour on her tongue when she realises she cant actually have it because of what she is. because kouyou believes anyone tainted by darkness the way they are can never be free of it. (because she couldnt get out herself).
i wouldnt be surprised if mori thinks the same way, certainly in regards to someone like dazai who Is naturally built for the mafia in a way kyouka really isnt. mori at least believes dazais blood is mafia black and whether or not this is true is irrelevant. he Does have to actively fight his impulses in order to do the Right Thing even now. And even doing that, he still falls into their methods when its practical, or when he's paranoid or unsettled enough to need the comfort of habit, hence the way he treats aku even four years removed from the mafia. hence the way he treats atsushi immediately after Q appears (the way he so instantly latches onto his older self literally slapping the self pity he detests in himself and in his former kouhai out of his current one). hence the way the parallels to mori spring up most when dazai has just been shaken by something.
so i wonder if mori let dazai walk into the light knowing (or believing) he wouldnt fit there, and would come back with a stronger commitment to the mafia as a whole because it may be a concept of sorts, but its one that embraces him in a way the light doesnt, and while dazai does things for the people He cares about, its a mutual thing - he feels responsibility for the people that care about Him too (which probably ties in to the desire for a quiet suicide without bothering anyone, and also to the disgust he has w the sheep - because it Isnt a mutual exchange there).
i think it was always intended as a temporary thing (five years away from the mafia maybe. the 'five years' right before dazai comes to take moris place). give him a taste of the light and let him come to his own conclusion that he doesnt belong there, and eventually turn back to the mafia where he does belong.
(despite suggestions that dazai Doesnt really belong there - smthn smthn cat/dog symbolism - though people suggest this implies he belongs w the ada and i dont think thats true either esp given the way hes omitted from the group so often. i think the cat symbolism w dazai likens him more to natsume than atsushi&fukuzawa esp given the way theyre shown tgthr so often. dazai doesnt belong to any organisation or rigid group, he just fits in line w whoever he cares abt and wherever he decides hes content to stay. v much like a cat actually.).
anyway, moris idea seems to be that dazai wld realise the mafia is somewhere he is cared for, and he cares for the people within it in return. though it doesnt seem to have really turned out that way (maybe mori j underestimated the power of the ada's one specialty: forced integration into its found family. lmao)
so you could see it from a practical perspective: mori sending dazai out to show him he really belongs w the mafia and shld come back to them when the time is right, thus mori secures his legacy by leaving the pm to dazai and the mafia is led forward by someone who could handle it the way mori has.
but. hes never pushy abt dazai coming back. hes downright polite abt it (contrasting to the way he treats yosano), and he puts an awful lot of effort into saving dazais life. (kinda funny that he sends chuuya to pick dazais ass up every five seconds with no reward for either of them - chuuya post dead apple literally asks and moris just like ? uh the safety of the city?? bragging rights😁👍? - but when he sends chuuya to save the agency as a whole the price is Heavy like. exchange of a member is crazyyy.)
dazai is always very much considered One Of Their Own. his seat is still empty waiting for him to come back, he and mori post guild are Always cooperating (despite the kinda petty way dazai talks to him during the reunion - the whole 'i burnt the coat' thing - its almost childish, spiteful in a way that speaks to personal hurt that undermines any control he might have had of their kind of distant passive aggressive exchange. but. im too insane abt that interaction that my interpretation cld be entirely bs.)
they communicate through this ridiculous game of chess, and rely on each other to keep both their organisations afloat. when anyone else from the ada tries to pull the same thing, mori pulls out contracts for their damn souls but when its dazai hes just like ? oh ur bf needs to save you again? of course i can spare him to go pick you up from european prison yeah not a problem! ill even glue his vampire cosplay teeth in!!
in connection with that, even with dazais commitment to Doing The Right Thing, he does not do it in the right way. hes perfectly content to use mori-typical underhanded methods to get the ada to the right place. he sends aku To His Death Knowingly for the sake of saving atsushi and by extension the rest of the agency (and he may have known that the vampirism wld sorta bring him back?? but he still sends him to die), and its sorta similar to mori sending aku out to deal with hawthorne and mitchell while hes in rlly bad shape.
anyway dazais methods always make me think of that cunty exchange sskk have in dead apple 'thats not the way we do things in the detective agency' 'was that a bad joke😘 ur too much weretiger🌈✨💖'. but like. dazai Doesnt work the way the ada does. at least not when things get tense enough to drive him back to habit.
i think people like to interpret dazai as being a better person now, and i think in some ways he is. because hes always influenced by the people hes around most. but also, his motivations havent really changed from pm era. he still does what he does for his friends, they just happen to be on the right side now.
anyway. mori puts more work into keeping dazai alive than any other character (bar perhaps chuuya - but thats because mori saving dazai runs hand in hand with chuuya doing it given hes the one sending him) which is. aurgh.
mori and the wish to save people is just interesting in general. the fact that he became a doctor in the first place is telling on its own plus the unhinged way he deals with yosano - of course someone obsessed with saving people would want a cheat card for sending Death packing - but maybe i could believe it was just a power thing, more to his sense of control. playing with life and death so that he can play god. and i think that probably is just a little bit part of it, esp during the war.
but theres also the way he treats doctors within the pm (sb calls it respect for his former position but it may also be knowledge that the better treated they are the more people they will save). And the only reason he works w the tripartite agreement is bc he loves yokohama, wants its people, including its underground, alive and all that (honestly it probably links back to war stuff - hes really intent on peace).
so hes already someone that is intent on saving people (and beast mori makes this obvious w the way he treats atsushi) but theres a personal edge to it w dazai, possibly bc dazai is so much like him, and asgr is kind of obsessed w the saving your mirrors bc you cldnt save yourself thing (atsushi. lucy. chuuya with his clone. beast akutagawa siblings. beast atsushi&kyouka. i could continue).
im frothing at the mouth but basically, mori does everything for practical reasons in line with his ideals, his grand vision for the PM, but that doesnt mean he isnt making any emotionally charged decisions. its just that theyre always justified by their practical outcomes. (Especially where dazai is concerned). so he can pretend that theyre not driven by personal feelings but IM WATCHING U MORI U CANT HIDE FROM ME.
yk i sometimes wonder if i see him too sympathetically for a guy thats as so sucks as he is but someone has to counterbalance the 75% of the fandom that thinks hes pure evil for no reason and has no thoughts outside of Being Terrible so. here you go have this from the depths of my brain.
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sojuyae · 1 year
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no return
dazai osamu / reader + ??? / reader
notes: mild yandere themes, u drink alcohol, inspired by the manhwa 'a false confession' (massive rec hehe) drabble..? oneshot..? i don't know what to call this since it's not really fleshed out and not given that much thought so maybe its just a random blurb hahaha not proofread i just click post and never look back thats just how i am
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the moment you step into the balcony, your legs almost gave out. your hand having to lean on the vine ornamented pillar as support. stillness draping over despite the festivity just behind the door.
just a few feet beyond you, stood your senior. even with your vision hazy and eyes half lidded, you think you can see his silhouette leaning over the railings, his back turned against you, coat billowing in the wind, tousling the hair of his that you've always wanted to tuck behind his ear.
he looks particularly different, today.
the man of your affections — whose hands that are always resting upon your shoulders, his touch lingering a far too much for someone who is only concerned about his coworker, muttering words of 'good job!' every time he looks over your computer to see the progress of the report he assigned.
he, who is always eager to bring you trinkets of all kinds after being assigned in a case, and if you had the ability similar to his, you would've caught on the fact that the trinkets are always given by him personally, rather than your unfortunate coworkers whose gifts are left in their desks.
yet frown would replace your previous smile once he pulls away with a pat; when you remember that everyone got the same gift as you did.
(oh, how you lamented every second that passes without him knowing how you felt.)
but that will change tonight — your intoxicated self decided to confess your long time admiration for your senior. 'and if he rejects your love, then you can just say that you were too drunk! it's easy!' tanizaki said so, as he handed you an alcoholic drink, and you shouldn't have trusted any words that comes out of the orange haired mans mouth.
even if the others knew how bad you felt about him, you prefer to believe that you could keep your feelings to yourself.
with a determination only a drunken one can have, you step further away from the loud music of the party and towards the man.
a heavy breath escapes your lips as you stand just a few feet behind him.
"sir," you first regard him with his title you've always used during work, and a part of you wonders if you'll be able to call him endearments you've always wanted to say after he accepts your confession.
you don't think you can look at him right now.
"i've been thinking about this a lot," you begin, hushed but nonetheless made for him to hear. "i, don't know if, i should really say this…" your eyes drift down to your feet, deliberating whether you should beat around the bush.
but you know you can't, this feelings of yours is too much; if you don't get to say it now, what will become of your sentiments? locked behind a glass heart that threatened to burst every time he's near?
"i really, really like you, sir." you finally say, your hands harshly gripping the sides of your clothes, scrunching them, wrinkles beginning to form on the flimsy fabric.
you refuse to meet his gaze.
silence ensues, the only sound heard; the loud rustling of the leaves against themselves.
"..."
ah, to think that you get rejected without even him saying anything.
"why?" he asks, then a hope ignites deep inside you.
"i just, really like it when you treat us kindly, you always go out your way to make sure i'm okay, your dedication to the agency is admirable, and i... just really like everything about you…"
"that's what any superior would do..." he replies coldly.
his words does not even travel first to your ears — it travels straight to your heart, so harshly that if it traveled to your ears first, you're certain you'd go deaf.
you stagger, the adrenaline the alcohol provided leaving your system.
then, he grabs your arm just in time, his bandaged hand surprisingly holding you delicately, as if he expects you to be gone once he pulls away.
"osamu. call me osamu, not sir." he says tenderly as he rests his hand on your shoulder, his arms coiling around you like a snake to a branch.
you smile gently as you bury your head in his chest. you can smell the faint scent of alcohol on his shirt, how strange, you've always thought he smell more like the sweets he'd always insist on eating. "osa—" the remaining syllables does not leave your tongue.
he rests his head on your shoulders, his curly coffee-like locks of hair tickling your neck.
osamu?
your eyes drift to his neck — are those bandages?
coffee-like?
dread fills your veins. dazai pulls back, your drunken haze along with it, finally able to look at him properly. his warm palm rests on your jaw. the dull brown eyes you’ve grown fearful of seems to reflect the stars, looking at you so, lovingly.
you don’t know what you’re supposed to be surprised of, the fact that a coworker whom you are scared of is looking at you softly, or the fact that he just accepted a confession that wasn’t meant to be his.
"should we keep our relationship a secret?" he asks with deceptive bashfulness.
--
"sir..?" you stammer as you try to look in ranpo's viridescent eyes for an answer to why he's holding your hand tightly.
"i've always thought that you…" his brows are knitted, refusing to meet your eyes, his own narrowed as he looks at the bracelet that adorns your wrist, an item begrudgingly accepted from dazai.
(he wonders if you would be mad if he forcibly ripped its beads out of you.)
he clicked his tongue at his own thoughts, shuffling to get a comfortable spot where he rested appropriately on his office chair.
"since when were you both close?"
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philzokman · 1 year
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wan ch38 is so funny bc why the fuck is this kunikidas reaction to thinking atsushi murdering and eating dazai WHY ARE U NOT MORE CONCERNED KING
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remlionheart · 17 days
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sheewwwww. okay, now that i'm finally getting some of these drafts published, we start on euphoria dazai TONIGHT! 𐙚 ‧₊˚ ⋅
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cerealandchoccymilk · 8 months
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idk if anyone here gives a shit but reading about the lives of japanese modern era writers is so fun...
(this blue mackarel/peach blossom incident is the most famous fight between dazai osamu and nakahara chuya)
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chuu-huahua · 1 year
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apparently the bio lab in our sch has good fengshui for buying taylor swift tickets?? + @downbadforpixels told me to write this, so let’s have SOUKOKU ATTENDING A CONCERT
let’s say it’s taylor swift because she’s slay and everyone’s buying tickets rn :D also skk is so taylor swift coded oh my god. ok but, even though dazai dislikes staying in crowded places for too long because it drains his energy, he follows along with chuuya when they travel to tokyo to attend the concert. chuuya had opened up at least 5 devices when the tickets were being released, and he had managed to get hold of two tickets for them. he barely bat an eye at the price, easily keying in the credit card details on the back of his black card as dazai watched from behind, both concerned and happy for him.
they manage to get seats right in front of the stage, and surrounding them is screaming crowds of fans who almost blast dazai’s ear drums off. he turns to look at chuuya, who has the biggest smile on his face as he stares straight ahead towards the stage, eagerly waiting for the performance. dazai chuckles to himself; if seeing the chibi this happy meant having to attend concerts like these, dazai would gladly go to one with chuuya every single day for the rest of his life.
they have a great time at the concert, singing along to the songs and cheering with the rest of the audience at the end of each one. the crowd around them moves along with the beat, and the many overlapping voices almost drown out the singer’s own, but dazai manages to single out the beautiful voice belonging to his partner, and his cheeks flush when chuuya turns to him. “my thoughts will echo your name, until i see you again !” he mouths the lyrics over the loud music, and dazai grins back.
after the concert, the two of them head back to their apartment together in silence, throats sore from shouting to the music. chuuya has one hand on the steering wheel, the other linked with dazai’s, and he quietly hums to one of the songs from earlier. dazai’s lips purse, before mouthing back his reply to chuuya. 
“these are the words i held back, as i was leaving too soon: i was enchanted to meet you...”
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nyazai-osameow · 2 years
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btw the take of “Dazai is very remorseful of those he’s killed and his history in the PM (which is why he’s a good person, actually)” is a take that literally spits in his, as well as the whole of BSD’s, face. in this essay i will
its a bad idea to try to make this post right now because MAN disorganized thinking and speech is kicking my ass currently. so heres your warning. but i must speak. the truth deserves to be spoken
first i want to make it clear that the take itself is not inherently wrong or ““problematic”“ (please bear with me accurate and precise words are not in my vocab rn). because i mean... who fucking knows with Dazai and his feelings. he COULD be remorseful of all that. or he could not. i mean more evidence points to the lack of remorse than feeling remorseful, but this post is not about that.
what then makes this take so Bad is when its argued for the SOLE purpose of trying to defend him and convince people that he’s a good person actually and deserves to be where he is.
whether or not Dazai feels remorse for everything he’s done literally doesn’t matter. and trying to put so much importance on this also flies over the point of so much of BSD and its characters. its not a prominent point brought up ever BECAUSE it does not matter. its not supposed to matter. and the watcher/reader must recognize that this is deliberate to help you come to the point that is trying to be made with so many characters.
the message that is trying to be broadcasted is: "it's not about who you are, but about what you choose to do". its about your actions in the present moment. what you are choosing to do NOW is what matters.
and hes choosing to work for the good side and help people. “but that’s only because Oda told him to--” NOPE DOESN’T MATTER! the reasoning does not matter. the motivations for the actions are not supposed to matter. its the actions themselves.
Oda himself’s whole deal was this. the one person that Dazai at that time saw as unarguably a good person. he was choosing not to ever murder people again. not because he felt bad or any remorse for having taken those lives, but because he literally just wanted to become an author. that’s it. that was his sole reasoning. that seems like an absurd motivation to anyone not him, and that’s what makes him such a good character and good guy. he was not trying to atone for his past. he just wanted to be able to write a book.
did this reasoning make Oda’s choice of refraining from killing any less sincere? no, it didn’t! it was still 100% authentic and everyone could see that.
the first major arc of BSD as a whole was about this message. Kyouka, who had been working as an assassin for the PM and had so far killed 35 people, decided “hey, i don’t want to kill anyone anymore actually”, and with the help of Atsushi made the decision that she’d help people from then on and would try not to resort to violence and hurt people again.
then again in season 2 after Dazai encouraged her to not let her past define her, she made the decision to use the last bit of freedom she thought she would ever have to save Yokohama from being destroyed by the Moby Dick.
the antagonists in BSD are the antagonists because they are continually choosing to cause harm in the present moment. even if they were good or neutral in the past. they are doing harm NOW which makes them a problem.
STORMBRINGER SPOILERS
in Stormbringer Chuuya makes the choice to give up what he and everyone else thought was his last hope of finding out for sure whether or not he’s truly human, because it doesn’t really matter as long as he’s continuing to live as himself. he’s Chuuya because he can strap Dazai to a lamppost and spin him until he gets sick. he’s Chuuya because he gets to have tea with Kouyou. he’s Chuuya because he visits The Flags’ graves every so often.
STORMBRINGER SPOILERS END
ok im tired but i think you get the point.
change da world my final message. Goodb ye
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awkward-dazai · 6 months
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IT HAS TAKEN ME FUCKING YEARS BUT IM FINALLY ABLE TO ACCESS THIS GODAWFUL ACCOUNT. i dont apologize for any inactivity and im surely not making a comeback, personally i’d like to forget this fucking blog ever existed. but im back nonetheless to give a life update or closing statement before i log out and finally live my life peacefully or smthn.
1. im not like this anymore. jesus christ. fortunately i’ve matured as a person now that i’m nearly 18 years old and i actually understand bungo stray dogs now.
2. nothing on here reflects who i am now. i fucking hate soukoku. i hate sskk. i hate bsd ships. i think a lot of the jokes on here were in poor taste and the whole schtick was character inaccurate… it was definitely fun at the time, but, alas, it is not that time anymore.
3. i have a new tumblr tjat u should probably go follow instead of this one if u ever want to see content from me. @nouveauxamoris 👍🏽
4. this has no relevance to anything else im just spreading my propaganda . chuuya nakahara is a trans woman . dazai osamu is a transmasc lesbian. dazai and chuuya have the exact same relationship dynamic as branch and his sleazy older brother from trolls. skk yaoi was never real and i no longer pretend like it was
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faerociousbeast · 1 year
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bsd fans are actually like... kinda concerning
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benetnvsch · 9 months
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sometimes I think abt how anime Dazai would have canonically had a different entrance exam then manga/ln Dazai like ?? what was it,,, what did they make him do,,,
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fyorina · 3 months
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ᡣ𐭩 MID DAY NAPS WITH DAZAI!
FEATURING: dazai osamu
SUMMARY: dazai does not nap. he hardly sleeps in general. so how is it that he's dozing off in your lap like this? you're a witch, he's decided. there's no other logical explanation. (wordcount: 800ish; sfw; fem!reader, mentions of alcohol & sleeping pills)
AUTHOR'S NOTES: very short & sweet but i toldddd you guys that i had a dazai nap time drabble in the works. i love my naps, so that means i obviously have to do nap time with all of the favs. perhaps i'll do jouno next. or maybe there's someone u guys want.
Dazai doesn’t sleep well. He never has, and he’s certain he never will. The only time he can manage to get some semblance of sleep is when he’s taken a few too many sleeping pills or he’s drank himself to oblivion. It’s unfortunate, but it’s a fact of life, and he thinks that he’d prefer to stay sleepless anyway if it means he can avoid the memories that plague his dreams.
Dazai can simply not remember when the last time he willingly slept was, which is why he’s so confused now, head resting in your lap, eyes heavy as he looks up at you. He can hardly hold them open, he can feel himself falling asleep and he’s alarmed because he does not sleep unless his body is drugged, drunk or dying.
“What kind of spell have you placed on me, bella?” Dazai says through a yawn—he yawned???
“What do you mean?” you ask quietly, fingers still carding gently through his hair as you look down at him, brows furrowed. 
He wants to reach up and rub out the wrinkle between your eyebrows but his arm feels too heavy. A part of him wonders if he’s dying, but he supposes if this is how he’s meant to go out—laying in your lap with your fingers brushing through his hair, staring up at your pretty face beneath the afternoon sun—then he couldn’t ask for a better death.
“‘m falling asleep,” he murmurs, and his voice slurs a bit over the words. His eyes feel even heavier, drooping shut as he tilts his head to the side to make himself comfortable on your lap. 
You giggle lightly, and Dazai swears the sound is angelic. “‘cause you’re so sleepy, obviously,” you say, a teasing lilt to your tone as you bring your freehand to his face to trace his cheekbone.
“I don’t sleep,” he protests weakly, leaning into your touch. 
He thinks that before he met you, he might not have ever experienced a gentle touch in his entire life, and now he simply cannot go without them. He craves them at every waking moment and gets severely distressed when he cannot obtain them. But only if they’re from you—the thought of anyone else touching him the way you do makes his skin crawl. Your touches make him feel vulnerable in a way that’s dangerous, and you’re the only person he trusts enough to see him that way.
“Everyone sleeps, silly,” you disagree softly, and Dazai wants to protest, to tell you how significant this is, but he can’t find the words. His mind feels muddled and hazy as exhaustion creeps through his bones and claws at his chest.
He supposes he doesn’t really need to tell you anyway, you probably already know—you always know somehow. You can always figure out when he’s having one of his bad days, no matter how hard he tries to hide it from everyone. You can always tell when he needs a break from everything, even when he tries to mask it with smiles and jokes. You can always tell when he’s sick of playing the role of a clown to make people overlook all of his faults and darkness, and you’re always there to be an escape for him. 
It used to be scary—he’s never had someone that could pick through all of his masks to see through his emotional state, his real one. A part of him wonders if it’s somehow a secret part of your ability but he knows it’s a ridiculous thought, because there’s no explanation for how you can do it whenever he’s laid up in your arms or draped all over you, which is 99% of the time he’s with you.
It used to be scary (emphasis on the past tense) but now, he thinks it might be a bit comforting to know that you’re always there and you know what he needs even when he himself doesn’t know. You’re like a buoy in the middle of a raging sea, a lighthouse shining through the dark. he hasn’t had someone he could genuinely rely on in… a long time, and even then…
Dazai lets out a puff of air, eyes finally sliding shut as he all but melts into you with your hand cupping the side of his face and your thumb caressing his cheek and your nails gently scraping his scalp. He thinks he might be in heaven—he doesn’t know what he’s done to deserve it, to deserve you, but he’s a selfish bastard at heart and he’ll be damned if he ever lets you go. 
The last thing he feels is your lips ghosting his temple before he finally dozes off. He sleeps peacefully for the first time he can remember. 
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rimbaudthursday · 3 months
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we as a society need to stop focusing on verlaine angst. "ohdhhh rimlaine they're so doomed :(( " "ohhh verlaine and chuuya :((("
we as men (gender neutral) need to acknowledge this man, this absolute loser, this girlfail, test tube baby, government spy and assassin is fucking hilarious. the audacity to be making silly little jokes while murdering people and plotting the downfall of society. fuck adam being the comic relief, verlaine was the real hero nobody wanted but we got anyway. this man backhands chuuya while driving THENG HE FUCKIGN "ohdhh chuuya :(( dear little brother of mine you're so light are u you eating enough :(((("
this pathetic pathetic man walks into dazais shipping container with "awwwhh are you scared of property tax :(((" THROWS A COIN THROUGH HIS WALL ANDN LEAVES
ICANT DO THIS
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chuuya-kisser · 3 months
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THEORY TIME THEORY TIME
ok. so. first of all FYODOR FCKIN DOSTOEVSKY I LIKE U AND ALL BUT???? REMAIN DEAD??? U JESUS FR??
ANYWAYS ignoring that
so bc i adore skk to hell and back obviously im gonna explore their dynamic first
what kills me is how familiar they are with each other. they arent insulting each other in every sentence, which is still alright. and what struck me the most is how much dazai seems to trust chuuya. more so than anyone.
so far we know that dazai isn't exactly the most open person around. his entire cheerful joking persona is a facade, a fake. what you see is usually only what he wants to show you. his real emotions? ive only seen them very rarely, if at all. now look at these
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the way chuuya says what he does implies that he is already used to this habit of dazai's, which is only possible if dazai did this in his mafia days, AND even then, he was open and willing enough to let chuuya see it and know that dazai was anxious. which means that even before mersault, before dazai left the mafia, he and chuuya atleast were that close that the usually closed-off, know-everything demon prodigy could show his worry to his partner, multiple times.
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i think that over here, dazai really isnt hiding his emotions. you can see the shock and worry on his face and in his eyes clearly as he puts the pieces together. not only that, hes also laying out parts of his plan to chuuya, in addition to his theories. which he rarely does unless im wrong about that (its possible). he isnt worried about chuuya using his emotions and weaknesses against him, because he trusts him enough, although i think the trust between them was already shown when both of them fake-killed each other.
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its easy to see the panic in his eyes, and personally i feel that this is him showing a bit of weakness, which is perfectly alright. the thing is that again, hes letting chuuya see this. I very much doubt that he would have let down his facade enough to show this to absolutely anyone else.
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also the poor guy literally looks so stressed out here give him a goddamn break asagiri
aaaaand now chuuya.
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now what strikes me is that even in the last chapter/s, chuuya has multiple times tried to reassure dazai that fyodor is indeed dead to try and calm down dazai's worries. this can also be him also wanting a damn break but anyways.
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and these panels. while many ppl are agreeing that hes just sitting there being a pretty boy while dazai tows through helicopter debris (and i agree), and definitely chuuyas sadistic streak when it comes to dazai is showing itself clearly, its often been seen in both the official arts and animanga that whenever working together, chuuya always covers dazai's blind spots.
think about it. dazai has his back turned towards everything. if someone launched a surprise attack on him at this moment, the chances of him dodging, finding out abt it in time is pretty low. chuuya is directly behind dazai. i got this idea from another post i saw, but what if this is also chuuya covering for dazai yet again? protecting him?
anyways thats it folks maybe ill make another post on jesus- i meant fyodor soon
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𝙱𝚂𝙳 𝙼𝚎𝚗 𝙰𝚗𝚍 𝙷𝚘𝚠 𝚃𝚑𝚎𝚢’𝚍 𝚁𝚎𝚊𝚌𝚝 𝚃𝚘 𝚈𝚘𝚞 𝙰𝚜𝚔𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚃𝚘 𝙿𝚎𝚐 ‘𝙴𝚖…
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Summary:- how the bsd fellas would react to you asking to peg em
Pairings :- Dazai, Atsushi,Kunikida,Ranpo, Chuuya,Akutagawa,Tachihara, Poe, Jouno,Tecchou x Fem!Reader (seperately)
Tw:- pegging, anal (m receiving), handjobs, mentions of dirty talk (and a single line in poe’s part)
W/C :- 1.2k-ish
A/N :- Thank You to @chuuyassluttychoker and @falloutjuli for givin me their feedback on this before i posted it. And Now Thanks To Yall pegging Kunikida in just floating in my head 😭 Thank U To My Bestie @sapphic-serenade too!
This Could Pass as a Gn! Reader except for one line in jouno’s part and mentions of calling the reader, princess and queen in Tachihara’s part
MINORS AND AGELESS BLOGS DON’T FOLLOW, YOU’LL BE BLOCKED!
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𝙏𝙝𝙚 𝘼𝙧𝙢𝙚𝙙 𝘿𝙚𝙩𝙚𝙘𝙩𝙞𝙫𝙚 𝘼𝙜𝙚𝙣𝙘𝙮
𝐃𝐚𝐳𝐚𝐢
doesn’t mind it tbh. He’d honestly love to have you do all the work while he sits back and takes it.isnt opposed to it and he’s so normal abt it it feels like he’s done it before🤨.takes it all in like a champ! And the way he moans your name just makes you wanna stay buried in him.he’s such a wet cat of a man it’s impossible to not enjoy his squirming~ especially when he looks so pretty and pathetic around your cock.face down ass up ofc~
𝐀𝐭𝐬𝐮𝐬𝐡𝐢
Definitely caught off guard when you ask!would be very iffy about it but when he sees your excited face and sparkling eyes,he just cant seem to say no!please be gentle with him,lube it up real good and slowly insert it. He’ll be a squirming and mewling mess for just the first inch,but dw he can take it.unless he says otherwise,in which case please pull out and tell him how good he was for you🥺 it’ll motivate him to take more later.what can i say this man is a slut for praise,and in cases like this it really tends to work in your favor~
𝐊𝐮𝐧𝐢𝐤𝐢𝐝𝐚
Honestly i dont see him bein pegged…he just doesn’t seem like the type to be down to try it.best case scenario you could ask him to do it on maybe a special occasion like your birthday! That’s when the chances of him saying yes are the highest.so if you somehow dooo get him to agree,know he will nott be still.Kunikida is more sensitive than he looks (in more ways than one iykwim ;} ) so you will definitely need to ease him into it,maybe use your fingers as a little precursor ,and if he gives you the go-ahead,be.gentle. He wont be able to do too much on your first try.Thank Him and tell him it’s alright please 🥲. (Dw he’ll more than make up for it later in the night.)
𝐑𝐚𝐧𝐩𝐨
This man doesn’t give a single solitary fuck.doesnt care if you wanna fuck him in the ass as long as he gets to be your pillow princess~ he can surprisingly take a good amount in and oh Godd the little noises he makes💞 If you thought dazai would sound pathetic nah uh,ranpo takes the cake.he lets out the cutest little mewls as his head hits the pillow.he’s folded in half, your ploughing into him and he’s taking you so Goddam gooddd. He’ll act bratty fs,so maybe plug him up a little to teach him a lesson. Maybe even add a vibrator to the mix~ (he will DEMAND snacks afterwards😭 give em to him pls🥺)
𝙏𝙝𝙚 𝙋𝙤𝙧𝙩 𝙈𝙖𝙛𝙞𝙖
𝐂𝐡𝐮𝐮𝐲𝐚
very VERY skeptical.doesnt like the feeling of being penetrated from the rear,but the thought of being at your mercy and under your influence,just…makes him a little more likely to relent.what can i say,he finds you taking the lead hot as Fuck! And while he’s definitely more of a top,i kinda feel like he has moments where he wouldn’t mind being pampered a little~Takes it quite well(surprisingly) and his little whines are the bestt ,if you dirty talk him while you’re pushing in,he’ll break his sentences with little gasps and moans in the middle and they just make you want to keep going.If u jerk him off while you rut into him he’ll definitely be caught off guard but it turns him on tbh.But you’d best believe that once youre done with him,he’s gonna flip you over and RUIN you.You had your fun,now it’s time for him to remind you who’s actually in charge~
𝐀𝐤𝐮𝐭𝐚𝐠𝐚𝐰𝐚
Nope.nah uh. No matter how much you beg,he’s not lettin you do it. Akutagawa doesn’t get intimate much,(idk i see him like sheldon from The Big BangTheory in this regard) and when he does he is in charge.he obvs wants u to feel good too but he does have a line he doesn’t wanna cross.also he feels like that puts him in a vulnerable position and doesn’t like it…its not that other positions don’t also put him in a vulnerable position,it’s just that this one makes him more uncomfortable…please dont pressure him into it🥹
𝐓𝐚𝐜𝐡𝐢𝐡𝐚𝐫𝐚
I honestly believe this bitch would be the most down to try it😭.He’ll be visibly chill when you suggest it,but inside he’s both anxious and excited, Goes with you to pick out a dildo.(if you dont already hv one that is) and gets flabbergasted when he finds out there are ones that actually cum!😭 (you have to convince him to leave it for next time🥲) when actually doing it,hes so verbal. Cussing,moaning,and praising you.wouldnt mind if you were a little rough. If you have him sit on your strap while you jerk him off he will physically fall apart; putty in your hands,if you will. Moves around and when you grip his hips to keep him still, he moans. While he likes to think of himself as a top,he’s a total bottom,but cam def top if you want him to.you’re his queen,princess and he’ll gladly be your good little boy☺️
𝙏𝙝𝙚 𝙂𝙪𝙞𝙡𝙙
𝐏𝐨𝐞
Blushes immediately but agrees. Reads up on pegging so he knows what to do,he really wants to do good by you smh🥲.would prefer if you guys did it in missionary so he can see you go at him but wouldnt mind you coming in from the rear either .just a little idea,when youre hittin it from the back,grip his hair and lift his head a little before leaning in and asking him, “who’s my whiny little baby~” watch as he whimpers before answering with a strained “me.” Oh also this man is definitely the most sensitive of the ones on this list. He makes the cutest noises too~ poe’s little whimpers and whines are honestly music to your ears and when you’re done,kiss him and tell him how good he was for you,he’ll physically deflate and give you the cutest fucked out smile🥺
𝙏𝙝𝙚 𝙃𝙪𝙣𝙩𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝘿𝙤𝙜𝙨
𝐉𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐨
Aint no way in hellll youre pegging this man! The mere suggestion has him bending you over to remind you who’s in charge.just because he can,he might just put the tip of the dildo you’d planned on using on him,into your folds while he takes you from behind. will not stop until he has you moaning out how stupid it was for you to even suggest that.fucks you so good youre nothing but a mess of cum and moans.So if you wanna get fucked up harder than usual,just casually suggest pegging him and in no time you’ll be “regretting” your decision.what can i say,he likes being in charge and likes it when you remember☺️
𝐓𝐞𝐜𝐜𝐡𝐨𝐮
When you suggest it to him,he thinks for a bit before nodding. He’d love to help you try new things while also trying something new for himself! He’s perfect like that☺️.isn’t particularly vocal but his breaths are heavy. If he says anything its, “y/n~ hnghhh~youre so~hnuhhh” if you use a vibrating strap, the moment you turn it on,he groans before it turns into a lowly moaned “fuck~” definitely gasps every few seconds when you rub his g-spot. Oh also doesnt mind you pulling his hair a little.Tecchou is a badass in the streets,but your little princess in the sheets and neither of you would change it for the world.
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