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butchbigcatz · 19 days

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Wc au writing, BlueQuince meeting and a lot of talk on how she loves:

(brief mentions of blood and lots of memories.)

Bluemoon loves in the way of a warrior, the only way she’s ever learned how to. She learned it from a father who was in her life like the passing storm he was, a distant drop of rain to an overpowering force tearing the trees from their roots. She never got her mother’s version of affection besides in the self sacrificing way. Her sister got that piece of her as well.

Her love is of service. A duty. She showed it by wrapping around those who were worthy and never letting anything get in. Or at least trying to not let anything in.

(The horrible feeling of cold crept in under her well made shell and stung. Ice, frost, snow, an impossibly small kit only covered in down succumbing to its greedy teeth. It’s little evergreen tail lost in the endless white winter around them.)

She knew the land that bowed to her step like its endless twisting trunks grew from her own body. An ever stretching expanse of green leaves and brown bark. The rocks under her paws were always the same. The birds singing above were always the same. The swaying shadows were always the same. It all held her like the warm pelt of another. She was alone yet so set in her place out here. She was of the moss and flowers, her blood pulsed and bled out into it all around her.

But the normal sound of her feathered fellow was cut off- and everything was new. Startling so.

(That same chill stabbed through the few unprotected parts of her and she felt herself shiver once again. No snow, no snow, no snow-)

Her legs warped and ran her forward. They didn’t need her brain to instruct their movement, they knew the ground underneath it, they knew to go before she froze to the forest floor. The act made her warmer. Blooming in her with an adrenaline that put her in overdrive.

Bluemoon broke out through a thorn bush, not even feeling its claws dig into her. And she was still hot. No longer from the forced movement that overtook her- no now it was from the anger that made her body bare up to fight. Thistleclaw stood behind his apprentice, the young naive Tigerpaw, instructing the striped kit to attack a scrawny little thing. It was shaking. The vibrations passed through the land and right into her own stiff stuck legs, like how she could sense a mouse hiding in a burrow. She knew the pairing of Thistleclaw with any young one would go bad but this. This was over the line. Sunstar had only done it to try and appease the enraged warrior after he was passed over for deputyship.

She felt herself barrel into Thistleclaw, paws against his back pushing him into the dirt, his grey fur tangling into her drawn claws. But instead she swiped her tongue to stop this- whatever this even was.

“Thistleclaw what do you and your apprentice think you’re doing?” She asked, letting her claws sink into the earth to hold herself in place while she spoke. He turned to her with a heat, his hatred for her boiling up once again. Tigerpaw stepped back and slunk down, suddenly realizing the white warrior was here. That wounded kit was still shaking and frozen in place despite being able to escape now.

Thistleclaw puffed himself up and pushed his voice to be more confident and less outright angry at her intrusion to his ‘training’. “I’m teaching my apprentice to defend his clan.”

“This is not how you train Thistleclaw. Defending borders doesn’t include attacking a lost kitten!”

All he did was give a lick to his chest, as if he was in the right. Tigerpaw still kept himself small. She couldn’t help but soften her expression when it went to him. “This kittypet crossed into our woods, and my apprentice was teaching it a lesson. Do you want more soft bellied pests in Thunderclan’s land? Taking our food when they have enough given to them for nothing? We would starve is all these collared self called cats decided they wanted to try warm blooded food for themselves!”

Bluemoon bristled at the way he spoke like he owned the tabby, and she hissed lowly at how he took this time try and call her weak. “The kittypets know the woods aren’t for them Thistleclaw and thrashing an innocent kit won’t stop the occasional hunting by them-” While she hated it, she steeled herself into a boulder and tried to end this.

“-And I would hate to have to report your bloodlust and bad teaching to Sunstar. If he saw this clear lack of honor he’d be sure to replace you as Tigerpaw’s mentor. Maybe to someone he actually trusts.” Her words hit like a falling branch, knocking his head in and making the grey tabby shrivel. A sneer showed across his previously smug face, that underlying grudge growing again. She knew if he forgot the power she had over him he would’ve thrown himself at her right here. He might’ve done it anyways, if he was entirely sure he could actually defeat her.

Instead of putting himself in a worse place he twisted his head to Tigerpaw and called the apprentice to follow him, slinking away with heavy paw steps.

Bluemoon had to hold herself from grabbing Tigerpaw and not letting him back alone with Thistleclaw. But that would’ve only ended with the two grown warrior fighting. If she saw him like that again though she would be sure to report him to Sunstar. And he knew that.

Finally, as the heat drained from her and into the cooler earth she looked to the injured kit. It was small, and almost all black with one white paw. It’s huge glazed over blue eyes burning a hole through her. That love, her version of it, reared its powerful head and almost took over all of her. She felt herself again in that stuffy nursery, in a nest she never imagined herself back in, with three little paws kneading her belly. That same exhaustion almost made her collapse beside the kit but she wasn’t there. She was here. And it wasn’t hers. Still she loved it despite the sharp part of her sinking its teeth into her and telling her to never get attached again.

She shook it out and drew a tongue over the hits head. Trying to stop its shaking.

“It’s okay. It’s okay. It’ll be okay.” She cooed as she licked away the salty blood that welled from the wounds across the kits face. It would scar. That set the dying embers of anger in her belly back alight. But she tried to keep that away to focus on the current kit in front of her.

Bluemoon didn’t know really what she was supposed to do at this point. It was a kit from a house, the smell of those places mixed in with the milky scent was there, even under its smell of overwhelming fear. It was probably hungry too. And cold.

(The temperature of this mystery kitten made her chest tighten. Her nose was frozen again. It was winter again. It was winter again. The sound of the river distant as the grief stabbed into her gut. She couldn’t save-)

She pulled her head from the frost and tried her best to warm it up. Small and frail against her, almost lost in her longer coat. She could save this one. She could save this. After a bit of curling around the kitten in silence, the warrior pulled her tongue from the place it stuck to in her mouth. As if it would shatter from anything above a whisper, she spoke so soft the wind could’ve easily taken her words away.

“Where’s your home kit?”

It looked up at her. Blue eyes slightly less clouded over. “O’er the fence. One with the bush”. Its voice was small and shaky still, with that kitten talk that made her melt immediately.

“I’ll bring you back kit. It’ll be okay. It’ll be okay.”

The warrior walked the strange streets and felt so out of place. The ground wasn’t soft or kind or comforting in anyway. It was the most disconnected she’d ever felt. The stronger breezes felt like they could steal the kit from her jaws. She didn’t tighten her hold but she did puff herself up bigger to combat it. Tall branchless trees stood over her and glowed unnaturally. Little stars seemingly trapped in their tough cages illuminating the black paths that carved between the many houses all around. They’d lit up just a little while ago but they still freaked her out. How had twolegs been able to catch the stars themselves? And why put such forces into these strange traps? It was wrong. She imagined her sister’s own spirit stuck in one. That made her stomach twist so bad she’d had to stop and duck into a darker more compact trail to breathe.

Now out of her hold and a little less shaky, the little kit stood and stretched a bit. Though it was slowly and with its eyes watching her the whole time. As if worried she’d snap it in half for stepping wrong. They stayed there for a while to rest. The sound only that of monsters roaming the paths and other strange clanging noises Bluemoon had no idea about.

“Thank you Miss.” the kit said shyly, looking down at its paws with a little bit of a frown as if upset by its own tongue.

“No need for thanks kit. Those cats never should’ve attacked you. I’m sorry they hurt you hon-“ she swallowed the endearing term. She couldn’t get attached.

The kit looked at her again with those eyes. So so blue. She didn’t know if its eyes were just that color or if it was still young enough to have that innocent blue in its eyes. Either version made her angry at Thistleclaw.

It had a thought at the tip of its tongue, possibly worried at what saying it would do but wanting to anyways. Finally the kit gave in and spoke “My names Tiny.”

“Hello then Tiny. I’m Bluemoon.” The name fit the little kit but she couldn’t help but feel like the name was half thought. It’d be tiny forever. She’d of named it something more like Midnight, for its incredibly dark pelt and startling white paw- the fact that slipped into her thoughts made her shiver. Cold again. Always cold. This wasn’t her kit. The sooner she found its nest the sooner she could move on.

“Blue… but you’re not blue.”

Bluemoon couldn’t help but chuckle at that. Her mind moving past at least. “No I am not blue but that’s just what I was named. Moon makes it a little more suiting doesn’t it?”

The kit- no Tiny thought for a bit and then nodded. Still a little confused but not going to question her name. Funny little thing. Though she wondered about how considerate it was of its words. Most kits just said what they thought freely. It reminded her oddly of herself. She hoped this kit wasn’t too much more like her though.

“Tiny do you know the way to your home? I’m pretty lost here.” Bluemoon asked as she stretched, getting ready to start walking again. She wouldn’t like to be here all night, especially not with such a small kitten. It was most definitely hungry by now.

Tiny shook its head slightly but then lifted its eyes back up as if figuring something out. “It’s next to a blue one though. And its fence is brokn.” It said, a long yawn following the little description. Poor thing. But Bluemoon now knew she was looking for a blue house. Well the house next to one but that would be easier to find. The warrior dipped down and scooped up the kit carefully, tucking it closer into her fur so it was slightly more covered as she walked forward.

Bluemoon had found two houses so far but neither had a house next to them with a broken fence. Her paws felt shredded from the rough terrain and her muscles were sore, walking and holding a kitten for so long was really wearing her out. Finally after she climbed up on a roof she saw another blue house. If this wasn’t the one she’d start her way back home.

The building wasn’t far from the woods and she probably would’ve checked it initially if she hadn’t started her searching already farther into the twolegplace. The house looked like most of the rest of them. Plain strange walls. So many objects she had no words for. Before she went up to check around she said a small prayer. And then she walked forward, coming from the front to then climb into the fence to see into it. The yard was like most of the rest as well except bushes lined the back wall. It wasn’t that odd but maybe, just maybe this was the one? Bluemoon did a quick look around before jumping down and luckily only smelled cat here.

Her heart soared as her ears caught the wailing of a cat, an anxious cry that made her know she was in the right place. Carefully the white cat jumped down and set Tiny at her paws. Having heard her the one that was yelling came around, looking almost like she was going to try and chase Bluemoon off herself but switching immediately upon seeing the little kitten.

She was a chubby black molly with warm eyes and odder white markings. She was small in stature but something about her gave Bluemoon the feeling like she could’ve beaten her if she had attacked immediately.

“Oh Tiny! Oh my baby my baby!” She sobbed as she carefully wrapped herself around the kitten, frantically licking warmth into its skin. The mother switched back to defensive when she noticed the new wounds in her kits face. The fur on her back lifted and hackles raised, now launched up to stand over Tiny with the power of a protective mother. Blue backed off and made herself less threatening, which was hard as she was rather tall compared to Tiny’s mom. But before anything happened Tiny moved between them.

“Momma momma momma! It’s okay it’s okay! Blue bought me here. She didn’t hurt me she helped me get back!” Tiny cried, trying its best to look bigger and break through its mom’s anger. Luckily she listened. Tiny’s mother softened slightly but still pulled her kit closer to her again.

The two cats just stared for a second. The distant crickets chirping as if it was a normal night. She only wished it was.

But the black and white molly relaxed more at last and laid down, her head nudging the ground to tell Bluemoon to as well. “Thank you for bringing back my little trouble. I don’t know how to make it up to you. I don’t know what id do with myself if my baby never came home.” She said kindly, blinking gratitude into her gaze. Bluemoon blushed a bit and tucked her paws underneath her fur to be more comfortable looking.

“No problem miss-“ She started to say before the molly cut in.

“No need for any misses. it’s Quince. Any cat who takes care of my babies gets to know my name.” Quince said with a laugh that made her smile with just its sound.

“Well then Quince my names Bluemoon. It was no issue getting it home, I just hope Tiny’ll be okay with the scratches and all.” She finished saying, a smile across her face as she tried to not take too much complimenting. The kit never should’ve been hurt in the first place. Guilt grew in her again. Some amount of it always hurt in her, but she tried to keep it from her pelt.

Quince shook her head harshly “Bluemoon… you’re one of those outside cats aren’t you?” She asked with a little edge of unease in her voice again.

Bluemoon swallowed carefully, trying to figure out what to say exactly. How is she supposed to respond? She is of course but she didn’t know if the fire would leap back her new acquaintance if she said so. But she couldn’t lie.

“Yes ma’am I am. I’m a warrior of Thunderclan-“ She started to say trying to be as careful as she could, still not knowing how she should explain all that happened. “- but I didn’t hurt your kit. Another warrior did and I promise you he will get a punishment for it. Warriors aren’t supposed to attack any cats that can’t defend themselves, and are never ever to harm a kitten. If you’d like I can head back. All I wanted to do was make sure Tiny got to a safe place.”

The cat across from her clearly didn’t know how to respond either. She had started to bristle back up again but the fur laid down as Bluemoon spoke. And she now just watched, eyes searching across her own to see whether she believed her or not. Presumably she wasn’t worth attacking because Quince went back to being more comfortable, that gratitude glowing in her face again. She bit back her own thoughts on that. Better to not show a lot of herself to a stranger. Let alone the things that bother her.

“Well thank you then. I hope he is dealt with however you warriors deal with your own.” Quince passed another lick down Tiny’s face before she got up and took it inside, probably to rest. That kitten needed plenty of sleep after the day it’s had. A want to follow made her twitch but she bit it off again. That’s not her business. She wasn’t Tiny’s mother. For a bit she sat there in the grass waiting to see whether she was to leave or stay. It was darker with the strange light coming from the inside of the home into the yard. But she stayed mostly in the natural light, looking at the moon above her. Finally at last she decided it would be best to leave so she got up and jumped to the top of the fence. She could’ve gone under the bushes and out the broken part but the would involve more noise and scrambling then she wanted.

But as Bluemoon stood ready to make her leave Quince came back out from the house.

“Hey! Don’t leave just yet Blue- not without a final thank you.” The black cat called and Bluemoon immediately turned around. She didn’t know why. A deep part of herself told her to leave. She wasn’t even supposed to speak to kittypet’s in the first place, and now she had wandered through their domain for hours to give back a kitten. But what was a little longer in the end? Shoving it down she jumped back to Quince. She knew if her father were here he’d of grabbed her by the scruff and dragged her back like she was a kitten herself.

She stood in front of Quince who looked at her in a way that made her forget her father entirely.

In the round cat’s maw was a flower, its blue petals stiff but beautiful. It didn’t smell like anything close to other flowers.

“I don’t know if warriors have these sorts of things but it feels wrong to not give a gift for you bringing me back Tiny. It’s just a fake but it’ll never wilt.” Quince had dropped it on the grass and was looking right into her own eyes, and Bluemoon almost felt like she was blessed. The stars blinked above her as if to say, go on, to her. The warrior had never felt so lost for words. And despite only just meeting her she felt the same protectiveness well up and wash over her. She felt like a guardian to Quince and her kits. She felt like her only duty was to her. She was a loyal warrior and yet now she had another to care for. So much took over her that she simply blinked before grabbing the gift that felt more special then anything else in her life. And even though she hadn’t said anything to Quince the cat dipped her head and turned back around to go to her house with its warm light and odd smells.

Bluemoon barely even felt her body as she turned around and leaped over the fence. Didn’t acknowledge as the trees blurred around her and the stray plants brushed against her. She felt the rocks under her paws but she also now felt the cats that were far behind her.

As she made her way back to camp she stopped and sat under a tree she hadn’t visited in a while. One with five stones and beautiful moon flowers around it. Tucking herself in its sheltered scoop of roots, she slept. A new flower tucked right at her chest.

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