#soap getting roasted by a child

[bigassmoonchild]

night team here

can we request ghost with a daughter that is the mini verison of him like soap thinks shes gonna be sweet and nice and she bullies him worse than her father does

bonus points

price already knew ghosts daughter was a complete savage but soap annoyed him that morning and price decided the consequences of his actions was being brutally roasted

(daughter is gonna be leaning teens just bc i said so. also, thank you so much for the request!! love the night team 🫶🫶)

soap wasn’t supposed to know. this wasn’t something anyone was supposed to know, but simon was decently okay with price knowing. price knew to keep secrets, hell, price had his own.

but simon accidentally let it slip.

‘i’ve gotta get home, early morning,’ he’d told the 141 when they wanted to go out for drinks after a successful mission. they gave him odd looks (one of them was a knowing one, but he’d ignore price being offered to come watch a recital).

soap didn’t let it go, no he didn’t. ‘got the missus waiting back there?’ and simon was exhausted, it was a long mission and all he wanted was to sleep in his own house.

‘kids got a recital,’ he’d muttered and had walked away. what he didn’t expect was to find a huge amount of messages from soap the next morning. most consisted of the same things.

kid??

who’d have a child with you??

what’s the mother look like?

what’s the kids name?

son or daughter?

maybe i wanted to come watch too

i’m technically their uncle

and simon had to leave, collected you from your grandmother and took you to the recital. you were beautiful, the pride and joy of his life. someone he’d never thought he’d ever had, someone he never knew he could love more than anything.

it took months for simon to wear down enough ti even allow any of them to see a picture of you, let alone know your name.

‘beauty, that one is. you sure she came from you?’ simon shoved soap off the chair for that comment. soap continued to rave about being an ‘uncle’ and as much as simon didn’t want it, he had to tell you.

you looked at him weird when he admitted he’d spoken about you to the 141. you knew, generally, what he did but you didn’t get details.

‘ok and?’ you’d asked. ‘what’re they gonna do? it’s not like they’re gonna do something behind your back, not like price has said anything,’ and he worried. maybe he coddled you a little, but you were his girl.

and you’d agreed to meeting them, but told simon you didn’t want to know when. ‘i’ll be thinking about it too much,’ you told him.

simon finally dropped a few names for you, late one night when he’d finally relaxed with some whiskey (he didn’t mention the watered down taste).

‘what kinda name is soap? he drop it or something?’

it took some time before simon had grown any sort of comfortable letting anyone but price be around you. it wasn’t common that you stayed by price when simon was out on a mission, but the occasion happened when it was possibly a fatal one.

it was early morning when you’d sent a text to simon, he hadn’t meant to go to the compound at all that day but had made a lunch. it was a picture of the lunch, still sitting in the fridge with the caption ‘you forget something?’

and he’d groaned, mentioning to price in passing that he forgot his lunch at home. soap and gaz had been there, and a little smile came from soap.

‘just have the lass bring it ‘round, i’m sure she’s dying to meet her uncles,’ price gave a little grimace. ‘what? she’s probably a sweetheart, i cant imagine a girl like her would turn out like ghost,’

you’d relented to bring it around, especially after price messaged you about soap not being able to shut up about meeting you.

he’s pressing me for information. -john

if you bring the food, i’ll give your dad an extra day of leave. -john

please, i’m about to make him run. -john

you always laughed a little when he signed off after each text. it was his own little thing, and you secretly enjoyed having a fatherly figure text you more than three words.

when you got to the compound, you found price waiting outside for you and you waggled the bag of food at him. he let you in, guiding you through the halls to where simon and the others were.

‘try not to forget it, next time,’ you told simon. he gave you a small grunt, one that sounded like his ‘thank you’.

soap walked up to you, giving you a cheeky grin and swinging his arm around your shoulder. ‘how’s it been, lass?’ he asked you and you shook his arm off.

‘you know it’s not the 80’s anymore, right?’ he blinked at you. snorting softly with an eye roll, you sat down in the nearest chair. ‘mullets back in style, you know. might fit you better,’ you commented.

soap was left with his mouth open, gesturing faintly to you then to simon. ‘she can’t be like you,’ he nearly hissed.

‘don’t act so surprised, she said damn near the same thing to me,’ price lamented, thinking back on his first time meeting you.

‘you from the 1800’s? christ, i haven’t seen anyone willingly have that beard,’ you’d told him oh so long ago.

you looked around, leaning towards him. ‘who else am i supposed to be like? i’m pretty sure he’s my father,’ you hissed back.

all soap could do was blink. a little ghost? no, he couldn’t believe it. he saw simon give you a little fist bump, almost saw a few dollars being passed between you two.

simon pulled his mask off to eat and you looked at him closely. ‘you get a haircut?’ you asked, squinting your eyes suspiciously.

‘nope,’ he responded. ‘got ‘em all cut,’ and you snorted a short laugh. soap couldn’t do much but watch the interaction, realization slowly settling in.

‘that’s why you tell those shitty jokes?’ he announced. ‘you’re actually a father telling dad jokes,’

you gave a little smile and he could see the admiration in your eyes. god, you were just like your father but the confidence came off of you so easily.

‘yknow he came to my parents job show and tell once,’ you told everyone and simon stared at you. almost daring you to finish. ‘he didn’t take the mask off and had to leave, he scared too many of the kids,’

you spoke so fondly of him.

‘but he’s a prick, so he just left,’ simon lightly kicked your leg and you made a big show of it. you might be his kid, but you had your own personality in there.

and simon would be dead before anyone took that from you.

[sprout-fics]

hey sprout 💚 could u spare us some crumbs of cod fluff if you got it saved in your drafts or sum

i was just starting to feel better about everything and and overall vibing with myself and then my ex decided to call me out of the blue two hours ago..

it's totally totally fine if you don't wanna do it though 💚

I’m so sorry lovely, I hope you’re taking care of yourself. Know that the boys would hate your ex for ruining your day, and do something wonderful to distract you. In the meantime, have a random assortment of 141 + Los Vaqueros bonding moments and shenanigans 

Ale is a very flirty drunk. He’s the type to sway over to someone he’s attracted to and sweet talk them in a husky voice, partly muffled by the music, and drag them out onto the dance floor. Man has hips that should legally be outlawed in at least 3 countries, and he knows how to work them. It’s worse when he’s with Soap, who feeds off his energy. They can tear up the dance floor and make any sweet thing blush so hard they have daydreams for the rest of their life. Gaz has several videos of the two dancing, and it’s practically obscene.

Ghost is secretly very cuddly, but only with people he trusts very deeply. It takes a lot of time for him to allow others in, but he has the most comfortable shoulders to slump on post-mission. He’s fairly used to the routine too. He crosses his arms, ducks his head, and feels Soap and Gaz settle on either side of him for a light doze before they’re back to base. 

Price has a very stern and commanding persona, but when he finally gets off duty, at home by himself, he’s actually a big old softie. He rises late, makes toast and eggs in his sunlit kitchen, takes a lovely late morning stroll, pops by the store, and turns on the Great British Bakeoff while he makes sunday roast. The boys come by and bring their own side dishes (Soap, after several cooking disasters, is forbidden from bringing anything but wine and scotch) and they all have a nice evening just eating, talking, teasing, and relaxing.

Rudy is an only child, but Ale is not. He actually comes from a large family with four other siblings, some of which have their own children. It’s a very carefully guarded secret due to the work he does. The siblings have their own dynamics and squabbles, but adore Rudy, the kids even more so. Rudy is fairly sheepish the first few times he comes over, but it’s eased by the fact that Ale is the kid’s favorite uncle, and they accept him readily as well. Ale has a photo of Rudy drowning in children, sticking out an arm in a desperate plea for help.

Gaz is beloved by the soldiers that assist the 141. He’s easy going, approachable, smart, and attractive to boot. There is not a single squad that he assists in training that doesn’t have at least one recruit with a lovesick crush on the sergeant. He’s known to get love notes, gifts, and more. All anonymous of course, because of the whole ‘Dating your superior’ deal. He’s always very flattered, but knows better than to go dating the rookies.

Ghost is actually a rather good patient, despite belief otherwise. He knows better than to ignore doctor’s orders. Takes his antibiotics, does the physio stretches, comes in on time for check-ups. He previously had a record of skipping the painkillers, partly due to concerns about addiction, and partly in a ‘tough-guy’ type act. He got a scolding from Price when the captain noticed, but it was done with such stern, soft concern that Ghost never did it again.

Soap and Price have a father-son type bond. They aren’t as close as Gaz and Price, but there’s definitely a lot of trust there. It’s very rare for him and Soap to be attached on missions, but it does happen. Soap finds himself very well behaved, but can’t resist the urge to poke some fun at his captain. Price enjoys Soap’s comments, and is able to parse the man’s Scottish easier than Ghost due to his previous experience working with Captain MacMillan, who was also Scottish

Rudy and Gaz don’t interact much in game, but when they reconnect a few weeks later after the search for Hassan, they actually hit it off almost immediately. Gaz is a terrible gossip, and Rudy is a ruthless enabler. They swap stories via text, and Gaz sends him pics of the 141 and their various shenanigans (Including the one where Soap talked Ghost into scaring the recruits by dressing as Ghostface and lurking in the corridors of the recruit barracks after dark) 

You cannot leave Soap and Gaz unsupervised at the club. They’re going to get stolen by someone.

Ghost has a weakness for the K9 military units that float through base fairly often. Soap will not go near them, and Ghost gives him grief about it, holding a dog and saying something about how he can see the resemblance between the two. (It’s actually a compliment about Soap being very loyal, which Soap knows, but still.) 

Price can still hear the scream when Ghost got Soap by saying ‘sic ‘im’ to one of the German Shepherds. (The dog was still in training, and didn’t understand, merely tilted his head at Ghost) Soap didn’t talk to Ghost for a day and a half

The group has a favorite pub at their base of operations, though it’s rare for them to be there. The bartender knows them, and knows their usual order. He’s always secretly relieved when they come in. They can be gone for months, but their return means they’re alive, mostly whole, and will fight another day.

[ghostismybbygorl]

Alright more headcannons

Pt.1

Ale-ale-jandro

Actually hates the song alejandro by lady gaga. If rudy is mad at him he'll play the song in the car full blast to piss him off

He's 38

Hes got a BIG family. He has 7 siblings he's the oldest out if all if them

hes got a brother (36) with two daughters (6) (8)

A sister (32) with a son (10)

Twin brothers (25) one of them has a daughter (3)

A sister (20) who has a 1 year old girl

A brother (12)

A baby sister (7)

Hes roman catholic and goes to mass regularly with his family

His patron saint is St. Jude Thaddius

Him and soap will go to mass together

He's got a necklace of Guadalupe that his abuelita gave him before she passed. Every time he goes into battle he kisses the necklace and prays to his abuelita for protection

He has a tabby cat named diablo that he rescued off the streets. The cat's a total asshole to everyone but rudy.

Him and rudy are married but no one knows except for his family

This man can salsa dance like nobody's business. Dont get him near tequila or youll be learning how to dance the tango, salsa, square dance everything from him

He's a happy flirty drunk

When he's mad he'll forget how to say english words so he'll just stand there snapping his fingers trying to explain what he's trying to say but getting even more pissed because he can't remember the word.

Accidentally got high off of heroine one time. He was on a mission and somehow a bag of heroine opened up in his face causing him to inhale some. He said it was the best high he's experienced but swore to himself to never do any type of drugs after that experience in fear of getting addicted

Casually pops his neck and it'll crack LOUD

Takes a nap at 3:00 sharp. If he doesn't take his nap he will be bitchy for the rest of the day

He listens to latin r&b when he's relaxing and bad bunny when him and Rudy are alone together.

Being the oldest of the family hes a very nurturing person. When you're sick hes by your side with sopa de fideo, vics cream, and some medicinal tea

This man can and WILL cook. He used to cook with his mom and abuelita when he was younger

He loves to make tamales it reminds him of home

His family goes all out for Christmas everyone has stockings, they all get hella gifts, they sing, dance, bring over homemade food. They all will go to midnight mass and then open presents afterwords when they get home

He's always the best gift giver

His house looks like this and he still lives with his whole family (click the numbers i also have a link to the Pinterest boards if u wanna see more)

1, 2, 3

He has those candies that Abuelas give out

Rudy rudy

Hes actually savage af. He'll absolutely roast the shit out of you and hell say it in the most casual tone

Loves bad bunny

Hes 30

Hes a only child

He has the most obscene slippers

He drinks coffee religiously. He's a regular at starbucks. His favorite starbucks drink is the java chip Frappuccino with two extra shots of espresso and coconut milk

He loves del rosa cookies snd can open them without breaking them. He gets really upset if he does. It happened one time before and he was close to tears

 he loves diablo like its his own child.

He was the one to propose to Alejandro. They where sitting on a couch watching tv when he just pops the question "you want to get married?"

He's scared of anything supernatural. Dont even get him started on horror movies he will legit start praying the hail mary

He gives great massages

He's hella lactose intolerant like reenacting world war 3 in the bathroom intolerant.

since he doesn't have a big family rudy and his family will celebrate Christmas together with Alejandros family.

He absolutely loves the cheesy telenovas

He has a iguana named pakko.

He lives in Alejandro house with his family

He gets really out going when hes drunk he'll start singing and dancing

Price

Religiously plays wordle

He'll bring his bearded dragon into work ever so often. It always creeped ghost out for a while but eventually grew used to it.

He like to put little costumes on his bearded dragon

HE HAS A FAMILY PHOTO OF HIM, HIS BOYFRIEND, DOG AND DRAGON IN MATCHING CHRISTMAS SWEATERS. (He paid ghost big money to make the sweaters)

He doesn't shave his beard at all during november and his beard will get hella long. He usually does this because he dresses up as santa for christmas and goes to children shelter to give children christmas gifts.

He's like hella good with kids, babies especially. If he sees a baby crying he can instantly make it stop crying its like magic dad vibes.

When hes drunk he'll reminisce about the past and tell the same stories over and over. He also gets really nostalgic with laswell

He's the one to throw the christmas parties he takes it hella serious its a requirement that everyone wears a christmas sweater

His house looks like this

1, 2, 3

He has those LOUD sneezes

He takes dad naps. He'll just say he's resting his eyes and then just knock the fuck out.

He saws logs when he naps

Has a squatty potty

Ghost

Knows how to sew and can pretty much make anything. Every year he makes little plushies for everyone for Christmas

He keeps it a top secret but he has a 7 year old daughter that he adopted. Her name is Samantha

When the team first met her they nicknamed her ghoul and she loved it

She has her own little ghost mask and she wears it around the base when ghost brings her to work

Price absolutely adores her and will often volunteer to babysit if ghost is busy with a mission same with laswell

He plays animal crossing in his free time. He says its relaxing or that hes "taking care of the kids island"

His house looks like this

1, 2 3 bonus his daughters room 4

You know the scene in parks and rec when ron swanson was drunk off of snake juice...yeah thats him drunk

He'll face time his daughter when he's away every day

He has chronic insomnia so he'll stay up days on end until hes tired and then he'll pass out on his bed and sleep for a whole day.

He lets his daughter pain his nails. He came in one day with hot pink nails 💅🏼

He has a tattoo of one of his daughters drawing and a tattoo on his ribs of his daughter's handwriting saying "i love you daddy"

His nipples are pierced

He's giving his daughter a puppy for Christmas

Laswell

Her and her wife have a daughter who's 10

She made price her maid (or i guess man of honor?). He was so thrilled and of course sobbed when he saw her walk down the isle

She met price at a football game in london

Shes 40

When shes talking to her wife she'll refer the task as her kids. "Hey do you want to come to dinner with the kids?"

She wears scarfs all the time

Laswells daughter and Samantha are best friends and they will often schedule play dates and sleep over

She gives out the most heartfelt presents. If you talk about something you want 5 months ago she'll buy it and give it to you on Christmas.

Her house

1, 2 3

When theres a party with the boys she, her wife, price, and his boyfriend will watch all the stupid shit they would do and laugh at them

She has a Pomeranian named Annabelle

She does yoga with her wife

She gets sleepy when she's drunk and will probably fall asleep on prices sholder

She loves the smell of rosemary

Soap

He has a apartment which looks like this

1 2 3

He has a girl roommate who keeps the apartment tidy and clean while he's gone. (he very much appreciates her and always cooks and does the dishes for her). She likes to roast the shit out if him when he's home.

He has chronic pain in his right knee which causes him to wear a knee brace occasionally

Hes smokes the elf bars vapes. His favorite flavor is the rainbow candy

He got a tattoo of a heart on his butt cheek. He has absolutely no clue when he got it

He loves tequila drinks

Hes a cocktail type of bitch. The boys will be sipping on bourbon and soap will be over here with like a lemon drop martini or some fancy cocktail.

He wears jockstrap underwear. He says it makes his ass look great but he also wears those funny briefs like the ones that has emojis or cereal theme

When he's nervous he'll start rubbing his stubble

As a April fools prank he grew his beard out and cut it like price's beard. He then proceeded to walk around with his hat and a cigar and act like him for the whole day. He later convinced everyone to do it the next year. Ghost somehow sewed a beard to his mask for this.

He snorts when he laughs hard

He will do any dare someone tells him to do. Gaz jokingly dared soap to snort smarties thinking that he wouldnt do it....he did it......he still smells smarties from time to time.

Ghost and him have matching tattoos if skeletons dancing

He likes to listen to indie alternative music his favorite artist is steve lacy

When soaps drunk he gets all lovey dovey to everyone and he'll start singing sea shanties and pop songs. 

He has a snack stash. Everyone will be debriefing and he'll just randomly pull out a snack and start eating

Hes always hungry and eating. His favorite snacks are gummies, oreos, and Takis 

He will eat ANYTHING i mean ANYTHING. He's tried the weirdest foods out of curiosity and from dares.

Absolutely love's Christmas he wears ungly Christmas sweaters the whole month of december. He has a whole closet full of them

He loves candy canes and will go through multiple boxes of them throughout the month

Hes a nail biter

He's the god father of ghosts daughter.

He has a shower beer after work (a/n: its when you drink beer while you shower very life changing highly suggest it)

Hes really good at soccer

He sleeps in the most random spots and funniest positions. Ghost has a whole folder of all the weird places soap has slept. Everyone will fuck with him in his sleep and do random shit to him here's a few photos of what he would sleep like and what they do

Gazzy

He gets chronic migraines

He is a very VERY emotional drunk. He'll be happy and dancing and next he'll be crying over his goldfish that died 7 years ago

When he's mad his atlanta accent will kick in.

He's very sensitive to certain textures he loves sof blankets and has them littered around his apartment

He's a Very picky eater like the pallate of a 5 year old

He LOVES auntie annes mac and cheese and will eat that on the daily (its his comfort food)

He's allergic to bee's

Loves foo fighters

He can play cello

He's has ocd and will freak out if things dont go his way. Price usually has ti calm him down if he has a freak attack

His favorite anime is darling in the franxxs

He has a whole squishmellow collection on his bed

He really likes to paint him and soap will often chill out in the common room and just do artsy shit together

He loves sending reaction memes

He taught price the woah and now throw the woah at him

If he sees soap the both will look at each other and then do the biggest most dramatic way of the whip

He makes secret handshakes with everyone. Hes still trying to get ghost to do one

He arranges the secret santa and he always gives the most ridiculous presents

He loves to do yoga with laswell and her wife

His apartment looks like this

1 2 3 4

[claraisanastronaut]

₊ * ⋆｡⊹🐚𓇼☾☼🦪₊ * ⋆｡

"Sunny days."

Warnings: None, just a little spicy hint at the end. Context: What it would be like if the reader and Soap went to the beach.

John “Soap” MacTavish on the beach

•He simply loves everything related to water. Although sometimes he is a little difficult to take a shower, but once he gets in, he doesn't want to get out.

•Soap is definitely the type who likes to try fruit cocktails and the most diverse drinks available at the drink stands on the beaches, he likes the more colorful ones. Honestly, I don't even know how he has the stomach to handle so much. He probably really likes fruits he hasn't tried yet, always looking for something new. He's not that big a fan of alcohol, but he's willing to drink it.

•He definitely likes to mix sweet things with savory things, you'll have to get used to the strange things he likes to eat.

•Yes, this guy loves inflatable boats and he would definitely pay to ride one of those with you. That is if he didn't take one that he bought online, imagine the scene: You and Soap going to the beach in your car, a bumpy road and as always Soap going at a rather fast speed. And the two of you sing Gwen Stefani's Bubble Pop Electric, each completing the other's lines.

•Soap is usually the one who sings the most on car trips, he simply doesn't stay silent, unless he's very concentrated.

•Soap, as always, chewing gum. He always carries a watermelon or tutti-frutti flavored one in his pants pocket. And how annoying the noise he makes is, because he insists on chewing with his front tooth sometimes just to annoy you and asks if you want some with a smile on his face.

• The car shook whenever he chose between going straight through or avoiding a hole. The road was really rough, but what wouldn't you do for a nice day at the beach?

“Babe, slow down. The boat is almost falling from the ceiling.”

You warned when you saw in the rearview that the ropes that Soap tied to the top of the car were coming loose from the boat amidst all the commotion.

“We always do this, lass! Of course the boat isn’t goin to fa-“

The boat instantly detached itself from the roof of the car, the ropes came loose and the boat flew away from the car until it was stuck in a sharp rock.

“It seems that the boat wasn’t ver’ resistant, ...”

Soap crosses his arms and smiles at you with a smirk. As if the boat crash hadn't been his fault.

“What were you saying, John?”

You called him by his name and he already knew he was screwed.

•Soap would most likely rent you a swan-shaped pedal boat and pedal for hours if he could, but you also had to rest. This man is a machine on both the pedal boat and the boat. His muscular arms help a lot in steering the boat and his leg movements alone support the entire pedal boat. It's obvious that he has the spirit of a restless child, he was a naughty child.

•Soap probably drowned the first time he went to the beach. And yes, he was the kind of kid who ate beach sand and drank sea water. He was chaotic.

•He definitely likes to build sandcastles, and he's good at it from practicing so much. He places the flag at the top and also makes a bridge to the castle. You sit in the reclining beach chair, under the umbrella while Soap builds a sandcastle, roasting in the sun.

•And if you had a child, he would definitely help the little one build his sandcastle too, fetching sea water in the bucket. It's very funny to see a very muscular, high-ranking soldier fetching sea water in a frog bucket that he bought for your son. You took a Polaroid photo of that moment and put it on the photo board you have at home.

•Yes, he would jump waves with his son. And maybe he would slip and drag the child together unintentionally.

•He collects shells near the sea.

The indigo blue sky, the dense white clouds on the horizon. The sun was perfectly warm, you helped Soap apply sunscreen and left him alone for a few minutes to read a book while listening to the sound of the waves. After these minutes, he returned with his hand closed, holding something.

“I brought some gifts, lass. They suit ye.”

You open your hands to receive whatever he was carrying and he dumps several shells into your hands. Shells of different colors and shapes are the most beautiful he could have found.

“Thank you, Soap. They are beautiful."

You smile at Soap.

"Do ye want to know somethin’, lass? If I drown in yer beauty, do I have the right to mouth-to-mouth resuscitation?"

Soap smiles widely as he says the tenth pick-up line of the day. Yes, you have a relationship. But that never meant he would stop flirting with you.

In a normal, very constant act of living with Soap. You put your finger on your temple and laugh at the stupid thing he just said to you.

•At the end of the day, when Soap's battery is finally running low, he drags you so you can watch the sunset together with his arm around your waist. Soap has always been a sea boy, just like a water-loving golden retriever. Soap suddenly picks up a stick near where you were, you have no idea how he found it. Suddenly, he sits down next to you again, the sand slowly melting away. He starts drawing with the stick, it seems to be just a few scribbles, but soon you see 2 stick figures in the sand: one looking like a cockatiel and the other very cute, with features very similar to... You.

"It’s ye and me, lass."

He smiles at you with those puppy eyes you love so much. You know that you are deeply in love with John "Soap" MacTavish and that he is the man you want.

 Suddenly, a wave comes and erases the drawing, Soap observes everything and sighs looking at the dark stain in the sand.

“Seall ciod a rinn an tonn, tha e coltach gun do sgrios e ar gaol, lass.” (Look what the wave has done, it seems to have destroye' our love, lass.)

You laugh, but kiss him on the cheek.

•You go home again after a long day at the beach. You take a relaxing bath together, Soap threw cold water on your face, but it was the best because of the heat, although it got even hotter after that. It seems like it's a very constant game in the bath. Then, Soap ordered pizza for you, half chocolate and half pepperoni pizza with a few more additions. It was a completely incredible day. And what a night!

₊ * ⋆｡⊹🐚𓇼☾☼🦪₊ * ⋆｡

Kisses, I'll leave the rest to you to imagine. This is my first headcanon, I hope you liked it.🤍

[theplanetprince]

Some more dash and a-lister posts that technically aren't canon but I feel like should be.

-Sam before her goth phase used to actually have playdates with Dash and Paulina because of parental obligation things. They all have a mutual understanding to never bring this up.

-they were the kids that had elaborate/cursed pretend barbie soap operas.

-dash stopped hanging around the girls in like the 5th grade, and this kick started Sam's joker phase bc of this "betrayal."

-Paulina's family bought a bunch of possibly haunted furniture from Ghostwriter's estate sale -- it has the side effect of giving her weird dreams and chronic head aches, but damn that chaise lounge looks killer.

-i full hearted believe that Dash if given enough time would have become the phantom's team medic. And when asked why he was such a jackass freshman year he would say "its because it's infinitely easier to hurt people than to fix them."

-on top of the cutesy band aids and teddy bear collection, Dash has a pink DS as well as other stuff like this. Its genuinely his favorite color, mostly because it's practical-- you can see it really easily, he knows no one else on the football team would have pink stuff-- ten percent because it looks good on him.

-Dash is Sidney Poindexter's Nephew. Sidney Poindexter was Dash's Father's brother.

-Same thread I think it would be funny if Star was distantly related to Young Blood- explaining her childish traits.

-Kwan's family owns a liquor store or some other small business in town. I say liquor store because it would be really funny to have a store called "Amity Park Spirits."

-Kwan's dad I feel like would be friends with Jack. Or at the very least Kwan's dad is friendly with Jack.

-Kwan is extremely different around strangers versus his real friends. Kwan is formal and courteous with strangers whereas his friendship Dash allows them both to indulge in their worst traits.

-Kwan and Val are Exs but are still really good friends, because no one can resist Kwan's charms. No one.

-Paulina and Dash love horror movies, Kwan can't stand them.

-Kwan is actually just a big of a coward as Dash maybe bigger but his fear response is to freeze, instead of run.

-Paulina, Dash, and Star try to keep up with the Phantom and ghost stuff-- while Kwan and Wes sound like those guys who can't tell celebrities apart.

-Kwan and Wes-- underrated dynamic I feel. Absolute Sunshine Child with the crustiest little guy.

-Wes only looks short in comparison to the others but being the basketball dork he still towers over the phantom trio. Though Paulina and Star don't let him get a big head about it-- they wear heels to dwarf him.

-Wes and Tucker are on the school paper together. Half because Wes is stalking them, half because he wants to perfect the craft of writing the perfect roast. Tucker despite thinking Wes is a total clown show often works with him on assignments.

[itrin]

damien's character questionnaire!

so i did the character questionnaire thing following wisteria-lodge's post for damien because I thought it would be fun and it was!!! love this guy he's got so many issues!! I encourage all damien brainwom sufferers to also do this and throw ur own hat into the ring!

anyways:

What is the character’s go-to drink order? black coffee, and damien likes to make it himself because the routine of it lets him pretend, at least for a few minutes, that he can be a person. he doesn't really care about blends or the roasts, usually just grabs whatever off the shelf; if the place he's staying at only had a kettle, he'll take instant coffee. (damien would never admit this on pain of death but: he has a massive sweet tooth too, and if he gets a barista to add whipped cream or cold foam to his coffee, then that's his business. and if u saw damien with a frappe, no you didn't.) he opts for black coffee because he thinks that's what he supposed to drink -- that's what his persona, crafted over years, is supposed to drink. he saw something on TV that said "adults drink black coffee."

What is their grooming routine? he has none lol. he has none. no one talked to him about it, no one told him about any of it. he cuts his own hair with a shitty pair of dollar store scissors when he feels like it because he can't stand the intimacy of a barber. he hacks at his hair in a shitty bathroom somewhere, and he showers with whatever soap set the hotel/motel provides.

What was their most expensive purchase/where does their disposable income go? uh.

Do they have any scars or tattoos? there's a very faded burn scar on his wrist from his first time cooking for himself, after his parents left. he learned how to properly handle a hot pan that day. he has a nick somewhere from the first few times he's had to shave, before he knew how to angle a razor. a little indent on his ear, minuscule really -- the first time he went to a barber and he just kept running his hands through his hair and damien wanted him to keep doing it because it felt good then freaked out about it and violently flinched away, making the barber nip him on accident.

What was the last time they cried, and under what circumstances? he does not cry easy, he hates crying. he thinks it's a sign of vulnerability, of humanity, and he is not human. robert was human, robert cried like a baby, and robert was thrown away, but. damien doesn't cry... mark left, though, and he closed the door behind him when he walked out and damien slid to the floor and.

Are they an oldest, middle, youngest or only child? only child.

Describe the shoes they’re wearing. fucking ratty, worn, filthy things because damien already has to wash his clothes in the laundry, why would he put in the effort of cleaning his shoes?? they're for the ground, they're meant to be dirty.

Describe the place where they sleep. wherever he can. his childhood bed in an empty, dark, silent house. during damien's first years out in the world, he would sleep in whatever car he was driving, and sometimes it was a luxury one with heated seats. then as he got more control, he slept in california kings in mansions and penthouses, bed and pillows so soft with down and silk that he could almost sink through them. as he got more experience along with that control, he usually went for understated but nice condos where he could convince the landlord that he'd already paid. blending in was safer. damien hates sleeping beside windows, the sun rays always woke him up too early no matter how tightly he closed the curtains and blinds.

What is their favorite holiday? he tells people it's halloween because he thinks that's what he's supposed to say; it fits with his vibe, his persona, right? but really, he feels detached from all holidays -- all the kids going out with their parents and groups of friends laughing together on the street. every holiday required someone else to celebrate with, and damien couldn't stand any of them. he hated christmas, out of all of the others. he liked fourth of july and new years, though; he would park his car on a high cliff and watch the fireworks, dazzled by the sky).

What objects do they always carry around with them? phone, but really, what would he need to? he has nothing. and can get anything. post-canon, damien gets a wallet, small and worn and ratty but it does its job.

[bene-darkmans]

Cal’syee’s living an episode of Shameless, Xandra’s living her TNG dreams, Vulcan’s on the set of HBO’s Rome, gloating about historical accuracy while still workshopping a quip about the world’s smallest violin.

First I was just squee about the new Summers baby, because I’m a sucker like that. The Krakoa era is a goldmine for wish list character interactions, everything and the kitchen sink. Soap opera and spectacle. Another stitch in a dangling plot thread, from I think 2013?

Ewing, you mad genius. Im obsessed with this page. Infinite room of parallels. I could write a 30,000 words easy.

“Safe from us, Gabriel.” Guffawed at Deathbird’s self-awareness. And the imagine of Gabriel suing for monthly monitored visitation as a matter of asshole principle and getting exactly what he wanted, cut away gag from an action shot, someone yelling where Scott is, cue panel of him halfway across the galaxy in dad mode.

But then you think about it. Vulcan was never a baby, he got ripped out of his mother by his future BiL and tossed in an age accelerator, it’s why he’s so messed up. All of which he blames his father for. For being too weak. His own kid was born after War of Kings, Cal’syee was imprisoned and experimented on by space evolutionaries, because the kid had “unique genes,” (still need to read that New Mutants run, and Xandra’s debut in Mr and Mrs X). Both happy parents are the Cains to their siblings Abels. Cal’syee was exiled for matricide and sororicide, Gabriel roasted Corsair AND D’ken, Corsair got better, The third parent more or less, symbolically and thematically. “Mr. Summers was my father/I… am Emperor Vulcan.”

Kudos to the X-Books forum for guessing the kid is actually a girl, Gibby’s “my son” versus Cal’syee’s “our child…” I thought Mom was diplomatically pointing out Gabriel’s sudden parental entitlement, but Cal’syee being jaded by a lifetime of Shi’ar Succession Shenanigans is funnier.

[epicmiscellaneousponderings]

Miscellaneous Media Moment

Alright so I'm watching the anime The Way of the Househusband on Netflix and writing my thoughts as I watch. This might be a tad unhinged, but here we go. As always if you liked this content feel free to be me a coffee. Also, yes, I do know that there a multiple episodes in each episode but I'm going to number them by how they're contained and labeled through Netflix as that's how I'm watching it :)

Episode 5

A job outside of the house in a cafe interesting, beans =bullets, the latte art of a cat, aww doing it for extra cash to get his wife a present

He's so loud, Again the food in this series really does deserve its own analysis post, overtime is exhausting,

Boss lady of the torii group in a grocery,

this is going to be a disaster of a birthday lol, wow happy birthday song as a dirge, shades and bling

the old boss has a dog, he sewed a sweater for the dog! nice tie in to previous episode, the impromptu cooking is wild,

The cat adventure with the grocery lady

Episode 6

he was totally going to roast that lady's "72 hour" cured sausage, he's taking this show so seriously, man loves his wife so much

the excitement over the steam oven, white powder=flour again nice call back, well that's one way to beat the dough, oven down!, keep warm on the rice cooker is innovative

fire next door, talk about needing proper air ventilation. the cops probably wanted some food, oh its rare eh

I admit nothing, oh nice flowers, oh its not that much and then proceeds to unwrap a dessert feast, rain as a mood killer, they're such a good couple

why would you try hitting a watermelon blindfolded?, the volleyball smacking into them, I love how Miku can be high energy as well, a real man is willing to get wracked protecting his loving wife, her carrying him

teacher au?? what am i watching?, apron art, the intensity in this scene

Episode 7

tapioca milk tea, getting the intel from the streets, the scary smiles keeping the customers away XD

Adding to the arsenal of the blond guy

The waking up to the husband in the middle of the night is seriously ominous, well that was an interesting take on the classic peach boy story, and then they had a group hug,

The hit list of summer assignments, a pen holder, colorful soap, school is tomorrow, the report to the teacher is so good

Tatsu you're so dramatic ( this is true, he a very dramatic king), oh the housespouse meet up, family gopher, the differing interpretations of what he's describing, is that really what Miku is rally like?, listening in one the one side of the conversation, the support from the housewives is so good

Oh, cat adventure of fair fighting with the other cat

Episode 8

urg the rap battle, so unnecessary, the explanation of what a rap battle is, the punch of silence, well ok

take it easy (yeah no, this guy has no chill), febreze the sheets, instant noodles as a vice lol, Masa helping him take it easy but as a horror show, Tatsu kicking him as a flight or fight moment

Wanting second place instead of first for the rice, and Miku wants the vacation, what a bribe, the kid wins of course

buffet battlefield, welp I'm hungry now, fruit with cream cheese is a delicious combo, aww the splitting of a desert

Oh, the dad wants to do the hotpot, Dad and Miku cooking like each other, Miku being a wild child (this explains so much), aww the dad saying she has someone else to protect her now and then Tatsu saying he has the dad's back, the mom being the true master is perfect

Masa wanting make his boss proud through the way of the househusband, tomorrow though

Episode 9

Virus depicted as a group of punks, trying to head off a cold through early preventive measures is such a mood, Miku being the light aww, the light with grenades lol

new threads, Masa is so not subtle, the brown powder as opposed to the white powder, and Masa has officially broken, Pine Dew huh, Tatsu sleeping with eyes open, the utter chaos and Masa being the sober one, the next day drawing of them is adorable

Will I need to use my dagger? no a normal knife will do, the intense music x_x,

The power couple helping the newlyweds

winged pup from the sky, you can't run from boss fights!, the magic girl transformation, the deconstruction of the outfit, Its all a dream and the meeting next week is perfect

Oh no cat adventure this episode

Episode 10

The fact that Miku has such high energy, the toys r us tribute

Sending dog pics to his boss, the bonding over the dogs, the random kidnapping, but its to a dog park

The cafe hurts the guys eyes, too much sweet things, lemon and honey chicken sounds good, the flashbacks paired with the wistful music is a nice choice, I don't remember there being a wasp

ok extreme dental care, um yeah that's not a good way to get a kid to the dentist, gotta face the music

counting to try and get to sleep, calming sounds turning to dark past is hilarious, also him without glasses is rather adorable, accidentally made a whole meal (he's got adhd a bit doesn't he), the cat being awake

the cat adventure with crow/raven

End of Season One!

Alright well thanks for coming to this Miscellaneous Media Moment where I do unhinged and most likely nonsensical rambling of what I watched is a thing. I will most likely continue at some point, so stay tuned and please let me know if this is a format that you liked. Along with any comments on the show that you have.

[bumblepuppy]

Since Monty did the OC questions for Cygnus and Dominic, I decided to copy him and do it for Isidore and Cassis. >:3

(Art by @rainy-days-and-nights​!)

What is the character’s go-to drink order?

Isidore lost his sense of taste when he died, so drinks don’t have much value to him beyond ‘cool me down, warm me up, or keep me hydrated’ (and he tends to neglect the last one as well). He’ll drink coffee when Cassis makes it and he’ll overload it with sugar so he can get some sort of flavor out off it, but if he visited a cafe that had carbonated drinks and/or drinks with tapioca pearls he’d go for those because the texture is something interesting. Cassis loves hot drinks! He’d go with coffee (light roast, cream and sugar), but on special occasions he’d order something more nostalgic, like hot apple cider.

What is their grooming routine? 

Isidore is an hour-long bath with fancy soaps and shampoos kind of guy. However... he loses that luxury pretty quickly after getting killed/brought back/forcibly employed at the church, and has to stick with communal showers and their supplied toiletries. He can go back to his hour long baths once he starts living with Cassis, but even then he has lost his beloved soaps. Apart from that, he spends a long time on his hair and outfits, making sure that as little of his discolored skin is showing as possible. Cassis is... a little less put together. Quick showers, ties his hair up every day so it doesn’t get in the way, and is cursed to have permanent stubble forever (because he’s not him if we draw him clean shaven) so even when he does remember to shave it doesn’t stay for long. He’s bad at the whole self-care thing, but having Isidore to comb his hair and take long baths with him is helpful.

What was their most expensive purchase/where does their disposable income go? Coming from a noble family, Isidore is used to having way too much pocket money for his own good. His biggest vice is jewelry, mostly because it was pretty and also easy to hide from his father, who would destroy anything that his son owned that he considered too femme.

On the other hand, Cassis is a poor farm boy who isn’t used to having much money at all. Most of the work he does is pro bono, and when he does get money he squirrels it away. That said... he has a weakness for anything that looks like it could be useful for his work. Scrap metal, bits of wire, anything of that ilk... he’ll buy it without a second thought.

Do they have any scars or tattoos?

Most of Isidore’s stitching happened postmortem, with a lot of it being more preventative than corrective. His arms were frequent targets of bullying from other inquisitors when he worked at the church, often being torn off and having to be sewn back on by the nuns. His most notable scar is his cause of death--the clean ring around his neck where his head had to be sewn back on. He hates being touched anywhere around it. Cassis has a lot of scarring, with his most notable scar being the place where three of his fingers once were on his left hand. This was an accident back in his teaching days that caused him to lose his job--a demonstration in front of his students went awry, blowing off half of his hand and burning parts of his arms and torso. Luckily, none of his students were hurt.

What was the last time they cried, and under what circumstances? Cassis is one of the two people Isidore is vulnerable around (the other being his sister), and all he has to do to get Isidore to tear up is say how beautiful he finds him, especially before/after/during sex. Isidore has the self worth of a tissue (especially with how he looks now) and has a hard time believing that anyone finds him attractive or worthy of their love, so it gets him every time. For Cassis... finding out that his brother doesn’t love him nearly as much as Cassis loves him, and that he thinks Isidore is property of the church and doesn’t even see him as human.

Are they an oldest, middle, youngest or only child? Isidore is the oldest child! He has two younger siblings. Eloise, his sister, who is. five years younger, and Andre, his brother, who is twenty years younger. He’s close to Eloise, and reconnecting with her after his murder is an incredibly important thing for him. Andre on the other hand is very young, with his birth killing their mother and kind of being the catalyst for their father to go from ‘aloof jerk’ to ‘violent homophobe’. Andre admires Cassis a lot and has uncle-zoned him, even if they’re technically brothers-in-law. Cassis is the youngest, with his older brother, Johann, being (approximately) six months older. Cassis was a child found in Johann’s family’s barn one night, and after being unable to locate his family, they adopted him. Johann and Cassis were originally close, with Johann being very protective of his strange new younger brother... but things got murky in their teenage years when Cassis began to get attention for his intellect while Johann thought he had nothing to impress people with other than brute strength. This percolated for too long, leading to Johann harboring a grudge against his brother, who doesn’t even notice that he’s hated.

Describe the shoes they’re wearing. Isidore’s shoes are part of his inquisitor uniform, so they’re mass produced and don’t fit him too well. When he gets to choose his own shoes, he’s a fashionable flats kind of guy. As a farm boy, Cassis knows the value of a good pair of leather work boots! His current pair is pretty old and scuffed, but he takes them to the cobbler regularly.

Describe the place where they sleep. Isidore’s childhood room at his family’s estate is spacious, but sparsely decorated. Since he was frequently bullied by the other inquisitors, he was given his own room away from the barracks! ...which was a sleeping bag in a broom closet. Before he and Cassis became an item, he slept on Cassis’ sofa, but now he sleeps with Cassis in his room. :3c Cassis is... a bit of a clutterbitch, and his room is in the loft of his cabin. There isn’t much furniture other than a bed, a closet, and a nightstand, but he’s covered every surface with diagrams and unfolded clothes and drink glasses that he’s forgotten to take back to the kitchen. Isidore tries to help, but as a little rich boy, he doesn’t have much skill with cleaning.

What is their favorite holiday? Vague fantasy world that we haven’t made holidays for, so I’ll just kind of gesture at real world holidays for this! Isidore has more holidays that he hates than likes. Anything that makes him think of superficial feasts and parties that he’d have to attend (or, when he got older, was forced to stay in his room during). Even though he’d have fun seducing some of the knights his father hired for the night, the whole business is agonizing for him. He’d like... any Valentine’s Day equivalent, because while he doesn’t need an excuse to screw Cassis’ brains out, it doesn’t hurt to have one. Cassis loves any gift-giving holiday! He loves making things for people and getting them to smile :) He likes knowing everyone’s birthday.

What objects do they always carry around with them? For Isidore, a cloak, cape, or hood of some sort. He has a really low self-image, especially with all of the undead stuff happening, so any way to cover his face or draw less attention to himself is necessary. For Cassis... his glasses and his prosthetic hand. He’s pretty good at using his hand without the prosthetic, but he worries that it weirds people out so he keeps it on.

[harrison-abbott]

All the eyes are whirling and dancing and they slip the calories into their mouths. You could be living on Pluto for all the presence you bring: they do not care that you’re alive; they’re only talking about the neighbourhood gossip from twenty years back – when the streets were still apricot and there were no mobile phones, when the internet hadn’t even started yet [this being the early 1990s, the best time in history: that final time to save the planet; where consumerism overtook the Western world; when the politicians gave their power to the markets]. They eat. Take the piss out of the neighbours. The folks they yack about are living a few hundred yards away, but the walls of the kitchen make it easy to assemble. The sluice of gravy and the roasted vegetables and of course the dead pigs and cows, all in browns and pinks and lain there in fleshy gleam, steaming, ach, those butchered animals taste so glorious, do they not. It’s not your birthday. Of course it isn’t; this is a commune of the elders: and he was a mistake child, with nae social ability, an embarrassment, an arrogant lil nobody – doesn’t matter what age he is. Then somebody offers him some gravy. He doesn’t eat that gravy because he does not eat animals. Somebody notices: “Oh no! He only touches the moral gravy!” And they all laugh – all 12 of them. 10 of the 12 are overweight and follow carcinogenic diets and drink with gusto. The other 2 are vegetarians (who will eventually become failed vegetarians) and they giggle and snort as well. It’s not his birthday. Amongst his presents are a book about a band from the 60s and when the big brother he sees it, he scoffs, rolls his eyes and says, “Oh, God, just move on!” And there’s a wooly jumper and some socks and boxers. The fire is coal fat; these golden orbs of rotten wood. What yomped humanity forward, what triggered the modern age. The boy’s age would probably witness the apocalypse, whereas his elder siblings would be just on the fringe, if not already just plucked off from cancer, or, more likely – just yet surviving on the rich leniency of the West, paow paow paow. When the super-elders are too drunk to do anything he goes into the kitchen to wash the dishes. Yes, that’s his job. Boo hoo. The siblings come in. And they touch him and tell him that they were only joking all night, only jesting, have a sense o humour, wee laddie, learn to get in the vibe of banter, for japes and jibes are how people make it through life. And the soap froths in the sink and the liquid is made up of 50 + chemicals and smells of his old primary school corridors when the cleaners came out and he was sent on errands to go and see whomever … Just as in school, he’s nothing but a high functioning autistic lad, with consciousness screaming all around him, a pressure and antagonism of which he cannot articulate. He accepts the passive aggressive apologies without accepting them. Yes, ha ho, ho ha. There is no murdered mammal in his gullet. On the iPod turret there’s a 90s band playing. And the brothers sing along to the wailed melody, though none of them know the lyrics, and nor does he. There’s a butcher’s knife by the sink, in a long lethal triangle. It could quite easily stab everybody in the room.

[kimberly40]

•The Grand Ole Folks of Yesterday•

Our great-grand folks were humble and poor,

In a little log cabin with cracks in the floor.

Carried their water up the hill from a spring,

In an old wooden bucket with a cup of tin.

Gathered in kindling from a brush patch,

Handmade lights and saved their scarce match.

Behind every stove was a strong wooden box

Filled with dry wood, carried and chopped.

Close to the fireplace, warmed their shins,

Goose-pimpled back when the draft blew in.

Read Bibles and few books on cold winter nights

By a dim little blaze of a dim little light.

Hunted for sport, a mess of wild meat.

Tanned the hides of a carcass to eat.

Knew every varmint by the print of his paw,

Tracked them down during the snow and spring thaw.

Children walked to school more than a mile,

Through drifted snow the wind had piled,

Struggled hard to get there and back,

With heavy feet wrapped in old feed sacks.

Loose straw beds that they stirred each night,

With homemade comforts tucked in tight.

Feather beds in each home plumped and plied

Covers so heavy the body grew tired.

Up bright and early to get the stove hot,

Cooked soup beans in an old iron pot.

Corn boiled in water with wood-made lye,

Made their hominy we now cheaply buy.

Their coffee strong, bitter and black

Roasted in ovens, then hand milled and cracked.

Boiled clothes in a kettle with lye soap,

No detergents, no bleach, no powdered soap.

Caught the rain in a big tub,

On a wash board they rubbed.

Used the wash water to scrub the board floors,

Then with a straw broom, swept it out the door.

The old family cows made milk for the churn.

For this tiresome chore each child took his turn.

Sliced peaches and apples, spread up high,

On a roof in the sun to wither and dry.

Cabbage and turnips buried in a hole

Safe from freeze of the weather cold.

Gathered their dry beans in coffee sacks

Beat with a stick until the hulls cracked.

Cleaned by the wind from pan to pan

And carefully sorted each mess by hand.

Children’s toys were all handmade,

Crooked limbs made runs for the sled,

Baby had spools threaded on a string,

A pie pan and stick to make it ring,

They could bend small trees for a pony ride,

Behind a clay ditch play hoop-in-hide.

Wade down the creek in summertime,

Old fashioned fun didn’t cost a dime.

Fuel was made with strong muscles and ax,

And tobacco was free from all state tax.

Raised all they ate, nothing refined,

Our great granddads had a hard time.

Old-time folks would borrow and lend,

A shovel of fire, anything to a settin’ hen,

Thinned their blood with sassafras tea,

Used skunk oil when the colds and sneeze.

Broke leafy twigs to shoo out the flies

That crawled on the baby and made it cry.

Sad irons were heated on smoky cookstoves,

Rubbed clean on paper before ironing the clothes.

Baked their own bread, raised food and sewed

Each had his duties, each carried his load.

Butchered their hogs and rendered their lard,

Raised ducks and chickens in their backyard.

Dried green beans on long strings of twine,

Made kraut in a barrel, corn soaked in brine.

Raised sorghum cane, stripped off the leaves,

Precious juice from the stalk was squeezed.

The sorghums cooked in a large pan,

For fritters, flapjacks, candy and jam.

We owe a great debt we can never repay,

To the Grand Ole Folks of yesterday.

~Author unknown

[nyotasaimiri]

Arc Two (redux) 48

Snowflakes dusted his hair. Tarvei was glad for them. He had been near roasting all day, running errands as his boss negotiated a trade deal with a sect of the Avian Stargazers. They never do mention that part when you sign on as a merchant’s assistant, do they? he thought, baring his fangs in a wry smile. But then again the Miniknog rarely told anyone anything. At least he made it home before curfew. There were only a few guards openly patrolling now. They’d be everywhere by dark, of course. They were always everywhere, whether or not he saw them.

Tarvei sighed and shut the door. “Mom, Dad, I’m home.” The hallway smelled like oranges. Tarvei patted the potted tree by the stairs and hoped that maybe this year the blossoms would ripen into fruit.

“Dmin is still at work, dear,” his mother’s voice called from deeper in the house. “I’m in the kitchen. How did your day go?”

Vei took off his overshirt and hung it up on the coatrack beside the door, then tucked his boots underneath it. His toes stretched and curled against the thick rug. It was so nice to get them out of the restrictive shoes. “Not bad. I think we’re making good progress on that Avian trade deal,” he told her, heading down the hallway.

Any other Apex household might have had to watch their words a good deal more than that when talking about jobs. But most other households did not have Taisa Saimiri. Vei’s mother was washing the dishes when he came in, soap suds hiding the thick muscle of her arms. Her jacket was neatly folded over the back of a chair. It usually came off the moment she got home from her own job, just like Tarvei’s coat and shoes. Vei’s father often joked that he lived in a family of nudists. He didn’t have to joke about the rest. There were still pride and power in Taisa’s green eyes as she looked up to smile at her son.

“For the featherseed, right? Good.” She pulled her arms out of the soapy water and shook a little water out of her greying fur. “The damned rebellion has been causing so many problems with our food supply lately. This will be a weight off our backs.”

“And our bellies, right?” Vei joked, ducking a little so she could kiss the top of his head. “Aw, Mom, my hair isn’t a towel!”

Taisa chuckled. Vei had heard it a thousand times, but today her laughter sent a curious little shiver through his stomach. “Perhaps if you wouldn’t wear it so long,” she teased, “or if you brushed it once in a while so I wouldn’t have to do it for you.”

“Yeah, yeah…” Tarvei grinned and ducked out of the way of an affectionate ruffling, passing her a hand-towel. “You never do that to Dad, though.”

“He’s balding, dear.” Mischief sparkled in Taisa’s teeth. He had seen that smile somewhere else now. “I do try to spare the hair he has left.”

Tarvei smiled back and started helping her dry the dishes. “True. We’ll have to save up clothes vouchers to get him a hat for winter. Can’t have him getting a snowdrift on his head.”

He knew better than to ask about her job. She would tell him if she was allowed. Taisa was well practiced in not sharing too much. It kept her family alive.

“You seem distant, Tarvei.”

Ah. “Sorry.” He grinned sheepishly. “I guess I’m a bit worn out from work after all. Listening to people argue all day does get to you.”

Taisa hummed, almost growled, deep in her throat in hearty agreement. She could certainly relate. “I am almost done here if you would rather rest.”

It was a rare offer, and Vei would have been tempted to take it if he was not so focused on her. On how familiar she was. Yes, she was his mother, he had known her for his whole twenty years. But he kept noticing that greying fur, tawny eyes, hearing that deep, soft laugh, seeing the apex woman standing on the war-torn plain, a child’s doll in her hand—

How did I not see it then?

He shook his head and offered a sheepish smile, taking refuge under his childish mask again. “No thanks. I just need a distraction, is all.”

“Chores are good for that,” Taisa said, her voice neutral as she returned her attention to the dishes.

“Yeah.” Vei started drying again slowly. It worked, for a little while. But he kept seeing the familiar-twice-over color out of the corner of his eye, hearing snatches of a lullaby as she hummed while she worked. He looked at her, looked at the mug in his hands, and said, “Mom, can you tell me a story about Nyota again?”

[salomasretired]

What you need is a good spanking to teach you how to behave, and then standing in the corner with soap in your mouth and your red ass on display. You behave like a child, you get treated like a child. Even if you were to roast babies in the microwave, you are still just a stupid little child who is acting out to get attention.

Hi Dunce I actually missed you so much omg. 💕 (twirls in my skirt) I just knew that post would bring you back, you can’t resist. I had no clue that you were into that, you’d really enjoy that? Acting like a missing and harsh parental figure for me, someone to punish me for my spoiled behavior? You like to tell on yourself a lot, don’t you.

For someone who likes to tell one that they have no control, it seems like you’re so easily provoked into sending me sweet dreams that I can touch myself to. Listen, I’ll keep your other messages, just for me to read. A little keepsake.

I was surprised my other post didn’t get a rise out of you, the one where I’m like “I’m sexually attracted to weakness” or whatever. That one was made for you too, and I’m sure you read it, but it didn’t get a direct response like that one did. Sad. Wasted energy! Oh well.

I think I frustrate your small animal brain severely. You’re so high and mighty in your existence that you can’t really cope well with someone being similar to you but then again so utterly different. You lash out, you want to view me as weaker and smaller, diminutive, not at all a reflection of yourself. You associate feminine roles to me because you see femininity as weaker, I don’t doubt you view yourself masculinely in this respect. Did your father beat you, assault you, starve you, force these roles on you? I’m so curious!

It’s okay though, pet, my sweet Dunce. You shouldn’t have to pretend around me. I shouldn’t intimidate you. ❤️ I know the reality is that you just need the loving touch of a woman, one that sees you and respects your strength. You can cry for me if you want. I’m the only one listening.

[entynamona]

Chapter 1 3/5

She went to the floor where the sleeping rooms were located, on the north side at the main entrance there were offices and offices. Helena liked minimalism, and many times felt overwhelmed by the lavish decor that prevailed here. Fleetingly in the bathroom mirror, she noticed the flushing on her face from the effort. One day, Spencer had worn her out until a slight bruise appeared on her face. It took three whole days, but Helena was not disturbed too much. She always considered herself a strong woman. The warm water in the shower helped her relax. She chose a shower to take a quick bath. However, she sat down in the paddling pool, resting her back against the tile wall. She foamed the soap thoroughly washing herself, she spent a lot of time just sitting. She watched the water trickle down her thighs in delicate drops. As if it were glass, she wrapped her hands around her knees and rested her head on them. She mentally counted on her hair not getting wet and not having to wash it. If it was only a little warmer, she could go out in the wet, but with such a wind, the use of a dryer was possible. Helena genuinely hated hair dryers. The water was dripping, and she imagined what it would be like to have a dwelling in the rock and a shower overlooking the landscape. Melancholy hit her, so it's high time to leave the bathroom, it was not enough to feel sorry. In the towel itself, she threw herself on the bed to scratch a bit, opening the sketchbook she checked on the watch how much time she had. She didn't have it at all, it was five to five. It was still missing to be late for everything today. She was wearing a burgundy yesterday's dress that was lying on a chair and went downstairs.

The dining room was silent as poppy seeds, Aunt Marilla was still offended for the tablecloth, Uncle Reynolds for not answering the phone. Nur Spencer smiled gently at her. Spencer was really pretty, dark hair that waved from the humidity of the air, even though they had access to real strides, there weren't any easy ones on her face, except for the ones that relate to a smile. Helena's smile fell from her heart, and she replied. Their family often visited them, after Papa's death, they gathered here from cousins ​​and aunts, but she was not included in the network of family friendships.

Now she felt a little lonely. She started putting on warm food, she was about to put a piece of roast in her mouth when her uncle spoke.” We are really sorry for your conduct.”

"I know, sorry," she answered quickly. There was silence again for a moment. „What exactly have you been doing there for so long?” Helena felt her vein on her neck. For a moment she struggled with her thoughts, in her life she had really sincerely despised a lie. „I looked at the extraordinary world of Friedrich. „Uncle seemed to understand. Was she a coward without telling them a stranger or was she selfish? Many thoughts disturbed her peace of mind. She was just mixing potatoes with sauce on her plate and taking a sip of blackcurrant juice. „Do you realize the danger that may befall you? What would you do if you met one of the Moiras, how would you manage ?!” Helen barely swallowed her juice at this Uncle's outburst. „Reynolds!” Aunt Maryla scolded him. "Child ..." began the uncle. Helena looked at him with large eyes.

Two bodyguards appeared in the dining room. „Mr. Usher, guests come to see you. They are waiting in the office.” Papa's office, Helena thought. His uncle nervously threw a cloth napkin on his plate and got up from the table. It must have been something urgent and unexpected at the same time to leave so quickly.

[deeeelightfuldee]

How long could you run before getting winded? right now about a mile and a half but my foot would give out first.

How long could you tolerate babysitting a child? I do it all the time. 

Have you ever had to call 9-1-1 for someone else? Yes.

Can you do a handstand? Nope not even remotely close.

Are you currently wearing socks? I am not.

What’s your favorite home-cooked meal? right now either moms pot roast dinner or joannas pineapple chicken recipe omfg.

Do you wear a lot of jewelry and makeup? ive lately been wearing less makeup but more jewelry lol

Have you ever made soap carvings before? as a kid i believe so.

What are some television shows that you enjoyed during your childhood? rugrats, pepperann, doug, recess, arthur, even stevens, lizzie mcguire, thats so raven, proud family

What color were the last sneakers you bought? stark white.

Have you ever stolen anything before? What was it? once as a child. it was a keychain. 

Is your lawn professionally landscaped? we have the kids come do our lawn but the rest is needing help.

What’s your favorite baked good? cake

How many rooms are in your house? 4 bedrooms, 2.5 bathrooms

What is your favorite dipping sauce? creamy garlic

Do you have any colored lightbulbs anywhere in your home? no

Have you ever been arrested? nope

Would you tell your friend if you knew that they were getting cheated on? yes absolutely.

Have you stayed up past 3 in the morning this week? most nights i wake up at 3

What was on the last sandwich you had? I would give anything for a big ole sammich.

What does the soap you use smell like? coconut

Do you prefer to wrap gifts or use gift bags? wrapping by far. 

The last person you spoke to, do you know their eye color? in person? blue. 

Does anyone you know have their hair bleached? yup

When you’re on the phone, do you doodle? sometimes. i havent been lately but if there is paper and pen around then i will. 

Is there anyone you know by the name of Frank? definitely.

Do you own a trenchcoat? nope, i always wanted one.

Name the hardiest piece of technology you own? evidently this laptop looooooool.

Have you ever written with a pen that had pink ink? absolutely.

Do you remember the last thing you took a picture of? something on my switch to send to kile.

From where you’re sitting, can you turn the lights off? heck no. 

When was the last time you accidentally slept in? accidentally? years. at least like 8 or more years ago.

Tell me the last thing you searched on the internet? i was looking up a new pulmonologist and a new primary care doctor for gram

The last argument you had, who started it? I did. i was not happy with stuff going on.

Do you wear a ring on your left hand middle finger? sometimes

Are you currently in a smoking environment? lol no. very much no.

Can you remember the title of the song you last sang aloud? some sort of trashy song lol i cant recall which. 

If a stranger smiles at you, do you smile back? absolutely.

Tell me the current time? 9:17 pm

Are you currently listening to music through earphones? no, im not. im listening to fraiser in the background

What color shirt are you wearing? Is it your favorite color? It’s white with 3 black flowers and it says no rain no flowers

Do you own a pair of rubber boots? uhhhhhh nope. thatd be nice tho for rainy days

Have you ever owned a tire swing? nope

Does anyone you know own a bird that can talk? we used to have one. 

What make-up are you wearing currently, if any? my eyebrows are done up.

Name one thing you are glad you accomplished today? the gym

Name one thing you wished you accomplished today but didn’t? i wish the stuff with the lincoln was totally addressed. now im without a car for 2 weeks. Have you ever been afraid to call someone, even if you knew them well? yes. i dont like calling almost anyone. Do you ever not speak to someone because you’re afraid you’ll annoy them? yes.

Is there any drama going on in your circle of friends? not with em & nathan. yes with alix. yes with K and yes with Z.

Have you ever known a guy who caused a lot of drama? omg yes

Is there anyone you know who wears their hair in pigtails regularly? right now, della.

Personally, do you think you have a nice smile? eh no.

Do you have a nervous twitch? no

Have you ever taken care of a drunk friend? lol yes but i was just as drunk so it wasn’t much help.

How about a hungover friend? mildly.

Does the idea of snowpeaked mountains and a large lake sound appealing? frig yea

Pick any number that has personal significance to you? 16

Have you ever lost your luggage at an airport? did i lose it? no. did the airline lose it? yes. did they recover it? eventually.

Have you ever been on a rollercoaster that actually scared you? i can’t do rollercoasters.

Do you know anyone who can fluently speak more than two languages? yes

The last person who texted you, have you ever fought with them? k and i fight all the time.

How many windows are open on your computer right now? three including this one

Do you have a fairly fast or slow internet connection? its normally quite fast

Have you ever gone in a sauna? no. im already boiling 99% of the time. Out of these colors, which appeals most to you: orange, blue, or green? blue

Have you celebrated your birthday yet this year? Nope. july is yet to come

Is there anything you’re saving up for? oh dont get me started. loans, a trip, my amazon cart, old navy, new clothes sizes smaller. lol Are you taller than most of your friends? yep. most of them unfortunately.

Know anyone with a really annoying laugh? yes lol

Have you ever punched someone and broke their nose? Nope.

What is the longest time you have gone without sleep? 3 nights

If given the opportunity, would you act in a commercial? probably not

You see an ant on the ground, do you squish it? omg no

Have you ever baked a pie? Yes! i love to do so. its very soothing for me

What is your favorite social networking site? Instagram.. but i think im gonna go on a hiatus

Who was the last person to call you? uhhhhhh K

Does anyone in your family tell funny stories? yes but notably mine are funnier. 

Is there a war memorial where you live? yes

Has anyone in your family fought in any of the wars? yes.

Would you make any changes to your current bedroom? id love a bathroom and a bigger closet lol

Has a stray dog ever tried to bite you? not to my knowledge.

When riding a bus, do you prefer to sit up front, down back or the middle? i dont know that i ever have

Have you ever been on a cross-country train ride? no but i wish

Are you normally a person to tell people off? Loooooooooooooooooooooool. no. 

Name an object that most would consider odd that’s special to you? ummm lol a sweatshirt

What animal have you always wanted as a pet but couldn’t have? big cats

Do you currently have any bugbites? no thank God.

Is where you live on a boulevard, road, street, or avenue? street

Is there currently any caffeine in your system? no, i dont believe so.

Look around, are things organized? its getting there. im doing rearranging to my system so its all a wee out of whack.

Is there any TV show that ended that you wish hadn’t? YES. so many

Know what you’re planning to do after this? possibly another. maybe not.

[sweeterthansammy]

Better Than Sex? || Trevor Belmont

Trevor Belmont x Female Pirate!Reader; Reader plays the role of Trevor’s wife.

Summary: When Trevor claims that ale is better than sex, Y/N gives him the worst case of blue balls.

Genre: Smut

Written in third person point of view.

Warnings: Smut, NSFW, fingering, fisting (?), vaginal penetration, rough sex, unprotected sex, overstimulation, orgasm denial, hair pulling, biting, choking, mild language, sexual innuendos (throughout the imagine), mentions of drinking, mentions of smoking, mentions of pregnancy, & Trevor being the horny little shit he is lmao

A/N: So, I posted this on my first piece on AO3 and let me just tell you...I FUCKING HATE IT. Anywho, enjoy this while I go to sleep :)

Word count: 3.5k

She twisted her neck as she sat down, groaning audibly at the stiffness in her neck.

“Rough day, m’lady?” the clerk asked, filling a tankard with the cold ale before slipping it in front of her.

“You bet your arse it was a tough day,” she replied, taking a swig of the ale as she gripped onto the stein. “I’ve got my husband groaning about the number of night creatures he’s killed in one night, my crew complaining about me leaving. I just needed a nice cold-”

“Stein of ale.”

The voice was familiar enough.

“How the fuck did you find me?” she asked, annoyance bountiful in her tone.

She loved Trevor to bits but having him up her behind all day was becoming a whole task.

“It isn’t very hard when you’re practically married to yourself,” he snarkily chuckled, tilting his head back as the yellow liquid streamed down his throat. “Oh my god, that is better than sex.”

She scoffed, crossing her arms over her chest before kicking his stool. Never underestimate the leg of a pirate - that was rule number one in Trevor’s book to marrying a pirate. His malt came spewing out of the mug, landing all over the lower half of his face and the collar of his shirt as he landed flat on his bottom.

“Glad it’s better than sex, Trevor,” she hummed, taking one last sip of her ale before slinging her coat over her shoulders, swiftly making her way out of the pub.

“That’s why I never got married,” the clerk retorted, drying a stein before placing it rim-down on the counter.

-

“Better than sex, he says,” she grumbled as she lathered lotion onto the spans of her legs after stepping out of the shower. “Can’t fucking believe he’d embarrass me like that!”

She trudged out of the bathroom, slamming their bedroom door shut behind her before dropping her towel, stepping into a silky nightgown before getting under the covers. She cried aloud as she heard his groans downstairs, just now coming home from the bar. She placed the covers over her head, trying to drown out the sound of him stumbling up the steps but it was near to impossible. He barged into the room, reeking of nothing but ale and other assortments of alcohol.

“Trevor, go take a shower-”

She was cut off by his hands taking a hold of the underside of her knees, pulling her to the edge of the bed.

“What are you doing?” she asked, her voice stern as he caressed her thighs.

“Can we?” he questioned, tilting his head to the side as she rolled her eyes.

“You don’t want me to kick you in the balls, do you?”

“No.”

“Then I highly suggest that you let go of my legs before I do.”

He dropped her legs with a whine, falling forward so his forehead rested against her chest. She carded her fingers through his hair, a residue of his sweat on her fingers as he pulled away from her, leaning on his hands as he towered over her.

“Go shower and maybe I’ll let you bury ya little cock inside of me,” she chuckled, softly kissing his lips before pushing him away.

He stood, rubbing his eyes like a child as he left the room.

“It’s not little!”

“Hurry up! I’m not wearing any underwear,” she teased, a fit of laughter consuming her as she heard the shower turn on in an instant.

By the time he’d drunkenly lathered soap all over his body, he was near to asleep. Y/N had been fast asleep, the shower running for twenty minutes straight. He blundered into the room, briefly waking Y/N before she scolded him “to turn the light off and go to sleep.”

“But you said-”

“Trevor, just get in bed,” she said, her voice fading into a whisper before soft snores left her mouth.

He dove under the covers, a heavy arm throwing itself over Y/N’s waist as his hand reached up to rest itself atop one of her breasts.

“Horny even in your sleep,” she muttered, turning onto her other side to face him before throwing a leg over his waist, her arm splaying itself across his back.

-

A week or two had passed and Y/N was quite proud of herself. She hadn’t fallen for Trevor’s weak attempts to get in her underwear. She wasn’t letting her hard demeanor fall no matter what he proposed. 

Though she wasn’t giving in to him, she was doing a whole lot of teasing - biting and sucking his sweet spots in the midst of a makeout, wrapping her legs around his waist and running her nails over his clothed black, and most of all, stripping down to just her underwear before heading to the bathroom to shower. 

Tonight they were taking a trip to Alucard’s castle, visiting him after many long-awaited months. Y/N was far more excited to rejoice with their friends than anything, hurrying to get on the carriage while Trevor struggled with her bags.

“Oh, right,” she muttered, hopping off of the carriage before taking her bags from Trevor, throwing them in the back.

“Thank you,” he snarled, a sigh following.

The ride was everything Y/N could have imagined. Though it became cold at night, Y/N greatly adored the trees adorned by emerald leaves and birds chirping throughout the forest. Night creatures were the least of her worries, she and Trevor taking them down in less than ten minutes. 

On the contrary, the ride was dreadful for Trevor. He and Y/N spent many hours with their lips locked, her ending up on his lap somehow, but it was her motive to stick to her plan, hopping off of him as he went to undo the buttons of her shirt. At this point, he was tired of it but he hadn’t exactly done anything to prove so.

“Please?! I won’t be long, I promise,” he’d beg.

“It’s quite a bumpy ride, it’s going to become uncomfortable very quick.”

“Then we can pull over!”

“Night creatures. And villagers. It’d be embarrassing if we were to get caught by anyone or anything. Besides, I’d lose my drive after having to sever off the head of a human-sized wolf.”

Trevor indignantly accepted his fate, remaining silent for the majority of the rest of the trip.

-

“Alucard!”

She was quick to jump off of the carriage, stretching a bit before running to greet her pale best friend.

“Hello to you too, Y/N,” he chuckled, his hands lingering on the small of her back as he peered at her. “Y’know, I’d expect you to be knocked up after not seeing you for so long.”

She chuckled, glancing around to find him popping a cigar between his lips.

“I’ve given him possibly the bluest balls ever since we’ve been together.”

“You are a terrible woman,” he grinned, slipping past her as he went to greet Trevor.

Settling down in the castle that night was far beyond elating, Sypha arriving quite late but still making it in time for dinner.

“You know,” Y/N started, taking a sip of wine after swallowing the bit of roasted potato in her mouth. “I was seriously stunned by how attractive you were when you first floated out of your coffin and I was tempted to drop to my knees right there and then only to be turned down after telling me that you didn’t go that way.”

As Sypha and Alucard laughed away, Trevor glared at her, his jaw clenching at the unnecessary insight of information.

“And I was greatly upset when Trevor made his move on you. I was waiting to pounce on him but then I realized how hot you two looked together,” Sypha giggled, bringing her attention to Trevor’s reddened face. “Of course, I don’t feel that way about you know. I’m more so jealous of the fact that you’re married to her. I’m not sure if it’s the insane amount of sex you guys have been having but she looks gorgeous. She’s always been beautiful but the pregnancy glow that is to come,” she paused, kissing her fingertips. “Chef’s kiss.”

“Why does everyone think that I’m pregnant or I’m going to be pregnant?” she asked, a fit of laughter following as she took a sip of wine from the glass in front of her. “I wouldn’t be drinking this much if I were.”

“Well, you’re postponing it,” Trevor mumbled, earning a guffaw from the other pair as he’d muttered loud enough not only for Y/N to hear but for anyone within five feet to hear.

“Piece of shit,” she muttered, quiet enough for no one to hear.

Drinks flowed like water, the group intoxicating themselves as each hour passed.

“Come dance with me,” Alucard encouraged, standing in the center of the living area as he put his record player on.

“Had you figured out how to not step on someone’s feet while dancing or do I have to smack you upside the head like I did the first time?” Y/N asked, fixing the button of her blouse ere to taking Alucard’s hand.

“You’ll just have to find out,” he winked, pulling her body flush against his while his other hand slithered around to meet her waist.

Y/N watched as Sypha dragged Trevor to dance with her, her eyes getting caught with the cerulean ones she was infatuated with. She grinned at him, tucking her bottom lip between her teeth as she shot him a wink. Alucard spun her around, their feet moving in a series of patterns with one hand onto his shoulder and the other in his palm.

“And switch,” he called to Sypha, the two boys switching their partners.

“And we meet again, Belmont,” she sultrily spoke, one arm draping over his shoulder while the hand of the other took ahold of his stubbled-chin.

Her chest was pressed against his, her breasts nearing his collarbones as his arm that remained tight around her waist found a way to hoist her body.

“You’re such a little fuckin’ tease, you know that?” he grumbled, his teeth nipping at the skin of her neck.

“What? Am I gonna get punished for it?” she mocked a pout, her cleavage on full display as the buttons of her shirt slowly came undone.

He responded with a growl, his fingertips digging into the plump flesh of her ass. Their legs were an entangled mess; her knee pressed right up to his crotch and his thigh firm against her clothed sex.

“Might as well just fuck me in front of them,” she muttered as he spun her around, her back against his front with one of his hands fixed on her breast.

“Trust me, I’ve considered it.”

Adrian and Sypha looked up for a moment, feeling the thick, tense rope between the couple. They simply looked at each other, stifling their laughter as he spun her around yet again, this time switching her off to Adrian while Sypha was reeled back into his arms.

“That was quite intense,” Alucard retorted.

-

He slammed her back against the door, knocking the wind out of her lungs as his lips attacked hers. Their lower regions ground against one another, his hands holding onto her knees while his upper half held her up. 

He pulled away for a moment, groaning at the sight of her swollen lips, a combination of their saliva coating the flesh. He bit the skin of her neck, rolling it between his front teeth before letting go, sucking on the skin to alleviate the tingling sensation.

“Strip for me - don’t take off your underwear,” he ordered, wiping his mouth with the back of his hand, panting.

She did as told without a fuss, shimmying out of her skirt and her blouse. He took one look at the white garter around her thigh, letting a scoff-like chuckle fall from his lips. Quite amusing she was. He watched as she stood there, nothing but white lace adorning her body.

“I told you to strip,” he said blatantly.

“But I want you to take it off,” she whined, folding her arms over her chest as she frowned like a toddler.

If he weren’t so desperate to have her around his cock, he would have no problem spanking her until she began to cry. However, he didn’t give up his rough demeanor. He held onto her waist, her chest right up to his.

“Fine, since you want to be such a little fucking brat.”

His arms reached around, fingers effortlessly undoing the hook of her bra before coming back to her front. One leg of his came up, his heel planting itself into the mattress of the bed before he spun her around, one of her arms throwing itself over his leg while the other held onto the one that trailed down her stomach, making its way into her underwear.

“Why can’t you just be a good fucking girl?” he quietly grumbled, his lips hiding into the nape of her neck as his fingers played with her clit. “You’re really fucking wet for someone who has so much mouth.”

His pinky and his thumb resting on the insides of her thighs, serving as a mini obstacle to halt her thighs from caving around his hand while his middle and index fingers fucked her furiously. She moaned aloud, her head rolling onto his shoulder. 

He continued at a vigorous pace, profanities tumbling from her lips as he curled his fingers inside of her, reaching for her sweet spot. Her legs quivered as he continued doing this, the tips of her fingers digging into his clothed shoulders.

“Trevor, please,” she murmured, her voice light and airy as ecstasy took over her.

“Please what, darling?” he asked, his voice gruff as his mouth neared her ear.

“Please let me cum.”

The chuckle that came from his lips elicited a groan from her throat.

“We barely even started and you need to cum already?” he tsked, pulling his hand out of her underwear and swiping his fingers over her bottom lips, requesting access as her saliva coated his digits.

“Mm, I should torment you for needing to cum in less than five minutes when I’m sucking your cock, shouldn’t I?”

She’d earned it. But he hadn’t decided whether or not he wanted to edge her until she broke or overstimulate her until her cunt was quite literally palpitating. He pulled his fingers out of her mouth, a dark chuckle leaving his mouth as he pushed her onto the bed. 

As she attempted to get onto all of her fours, he held onto her neck from behind, pushing her upper body down so her ass was in the air. He pulled her underwear down, earning a string of moans as he blew air onto her soaked pussy.

“You love tempting me, don’t you?” he queried, his fingers entering her one by one with each pump he gave, his thumb stimulating her clit.

His knuckles were deep inside of her, her moans lewd as they curled and twisted.

“Fuck,” she whispered, the side of her face planted deep into the sheets.

“Go ahead, be the loud fucking slut you are. I want them to hear.”

She didn’t give in to his commands, groaning into the sheets. A yelp came from her mouth as his free hand wrapped her hair around his fingers, grasping at her scalp afterward. He leaned over her yet again, not having anything to say at this point. His hand removed itself from her cunt, placing a taught slap on her swollen folds. 

He undressed in a matter of minutes, cursing at the layers of clothing that adorned his brawny build. He looked at her body, her body shaking from not receiving its release. He laughed to himself, rubbing the head of cock along her folds, her body shuddering under his touch.

“Shit- just fuck me already!”

That had come out a bit more pushy (and a bit louder) than she’d hoped it would come out. She was pretty sure that even Alucard, who was all the way at the end of the hall could’ve heard that.

“Such a little whore,” he spoke, swiftly burying his cock between her velvety walls.

Her back arched as he pushed himself further and further into her womanhood. Had it really been that long? She felt so full - for a moment, she forgot what it felt like to be filled up with Trevor’s cock. She felt every inch, their skin slapping with every inch. She instinctively clenched around him, enticing a loud, dragged out groan from Trevor. 

She knew she didn’t have much longer as she had two previous orgasms pent up inside of her, her hands clenching onto the sheets while one of his were on her neck and the other digging its nails into the skin of her hips. Her legs shook, confusion consuming her as he didn’t stop. She came around him, an utterly intense moan rippling from the back of her throat.

“Fuck,” she cried out, her back arching even further as both of his hands held onto her hips, pounding into her.

“Turn around, I wanna see your tits,” he grunted, breathless as his hips snapped into hers.

She did as told, struggling as he still screwed her.

He hoisted her legs, the pit of his elbows supporting the back of her knees.

“What the fuck are you doing?” she got out through moans, one hand throwing her leg over his waist so it could occupy the free space of her neck.

“Making up for lost time, angel face,” he obtained a “matter-of-factly” tone, adding a wink while bringing her to her second orgasm.

And it continued like this all night. His abdomen flexed as each orgasm washed over both him and her, the moonlight shining on their gorgeous bodies. 

“Gonna make you cum for each fucking day you decided to torture me.”

His hands had practically been engraved into her neck, red marks forming from how much time his nails spent digging into the sides of her necks. Her chest was littered in bites and hickies, a particularly dark bite embedded into the skin below her collarbone. 

His semen painted her walls, filling her stomach as the curvature of his cock protruded her womb. He pulled out of her after earning a whopping twelve orgasms before her walls clenched around him unbearably tight, squirting around his length as her hands scrambled for any bit of his skin. 

This orgasm waved through her like no other, her back entirely leaving the mattress as her nails pierced into Trevor’s skin. He pulled out of her, her jaw fallen slack as pants fell from her mouth. He admired the way his seed threatened to spill from her cunt, yet she clenched around nothing, sort of any attempt to cave it inside of her. 

He hurried to the bathroom, returning with a warm washcloth. He tenderly maneuvered the wet fabric around her folds, muttering encouraging words as she fought sleep.

“You can sleep down, angel. You did so well for me.”

“I can’t believe how outstandingly you performed.”

As much as she desired it, she didn’t go to sleep, waiting for Trevor to return. She let out a content sigh as she rolled over, one leg throwing itself over both of his as she held his body close to hers in her arms.

“You are one very determined man, aren’t you, Belmont?”

Her voice was hoarse, surely moaning and praising him for how well he was fucking her caused more than half of it. Her eyelids grew heavier and heavier, eventually shutting once Trevor kissed her temple.

“Only determined when it comes to you,” he muttered, his arms caving around her waist as he too fell into a deep sleep.

-

“Oh, fuck me harder,” she heard Sypha as she approached the kitchen, rubbing her eyes as she looked to see the three people she loved most.

“Don’t stop, Trevor! You’re fucking me so well!”

She couldn’t fight the pink tint that splayed itself upon her cheeks, the warmth radiating through the rest of her body.

“Oh, you guys are just jealous that you aren’t getting any of this Belmont dick,” he muttered, keeping his eyes on the scorching frying pan in front of him.

“Eh, you might be right about that one,” Alucard muttered, earning a snort from Y/N.

“Look who’s finally awake,” Sypha chuckled, looking at the deep red, soon to be purple marks decorating her best friend’s neck. “You two really went at it last night, didn’t you?”

“Pfft, it’s like he’s having sex with an animal or something,” Alucard retorted, his eyes trained on the bright red scratches on Trevor’s chest, back, and arms.

“Oh, shut it,” Y/N snapped, trying to hide the embarrassment by burying her face into the pit of her laid out arms. “When’s the last time you got laid?”

“Touché,” he muttered, an exaggerated sigh coming from his mouth as he took a sip of his overly brewed coffee.

“Besides, weren’t you two begging us to give you godchildren?” Trevor grinned, earning a groan from the rest of them. “I thought you’d be happy!”