#sol 🍓

[girlgenius1111]

all of my past i tried to erase it

part 3 of family line tensions are still high between Ingrid and her sister. Mapi tries to keep the peace. Solstråle tries to pretend she's fine. Ingrid tries to pretend she isn't going insane not understanding what is going on. cw: mentions of poor mental health / panic attacks. ingrid is pretty worried about solstråle and whether or not she is safe.

-------

It wasn’t really anyone’s fault. Mapi bringing her parents to the match shouldn’t have gotten to you the way it did. You didn’t really have an explanation for it, either. You saw Ingrid talking to Mapi’s mom and it felt like everything that had gotten marginally better in the last few days had miraculously disappeared. 

You were 8 again, sitting in the office at school, fielding pitying looks from the office ladies. Both of your parents were busy watching one of Ingrid’s matches; at just 16, she was playing for Rosenborg. Your mom was supposed to bring you to watch, too. She’d forgotten. 

You were 10 again, lying to the school nurse that your parents hadn’t known you’d hurt your hand. She said it looked broken, and you pretended that you hadn’t asked your mom to take you to the doctor the night before. You pretended your mom hadn’t told you to stop faking injuries when the attention wasn’t on you for one minute. 

You were 13 again, sobbing into your pillow, while everyone celebrated just down the hall. Ingrid was leaving to play in Lillestrøm. 5 hours away. She was leaving you behind. 

You were 16, having just been dumped by your first girlfriend. You’d come home in tears, and when you told your dad what was wrong, he told you it was for the best, that a girlfriend was just a distraction. He warned you not to bother your sister with this, because she was busy with much more important things in Barcelona. 

You were 17, so drunk you could barely speak, walking home on a dark road in the middle of the night because neither of your parents had answered the phone to come and get you from the horrific party you already regretted attending. It was dark, a windy road you were walking along, and if a car came, you weren’t sure your reflexes would be quick enough. You were 17, stumbling over the smooth pavement, the depression you’d been trying to drown in alcohol making a reappearance. You were 17,  thinking that maybe it wouldn’t be so bad if it all ended there, just like this. 

You were 17, standing in the airport with your parents, preparing to board the plane to Spain. You leaned in towards your mother for a hug. She avoided it, pinching your cheek lightly, and reminding your father that they had a dinner reservation to get to. You watched them walk out of the airport from your place in the security line. Your vision was blurred with tears, but you still could tell that they didn’t look back at you once. You were 17, and your mom hadn’t told you she loved you before you moved across the continent. 

In a second, all of these memories that you’d fought so hard to keep locked away deep inside your head were flooding out. Tears were pricking your eyes, and you cursed yourself for being so stupid. Ingrid didn’t care. Mapi didn’t care. You weren’t worth caring about. How had you forgotten that? How had you let yourself forget that, after everything? 

Ingrid didn’t see your expression change, too busy thanking Mapi’s parents profusely for coming to see her play. Mapi did, though. She watched as you caught sight of your sister talking to her mom, and she watched as you flinched like someone had swung at you.  She watched as you slipped out of the crowd, speed walking into the building. Mapi was torn in 2 directions, Ingrid on one side, and you running off the other way. You needed Ingrid, most definitely but Mapi didn’t like the look on your face as you ran off, like all of the emotion had been sucked out of you, and all that was left was exhaustion. 

Someone else had noticed your disappearing act, though. Caro stood, staring after you, before her gaze fell to Mapi, raising an eyebrow. The defender nodded, and Caro followed after you, while Mapi turned to her girlfriend. She pulled her away from her parents with an apologetic smile, appreciating that Alexia walked over and picked up the conversation where it had left off. 

“Ingrid, vamos,” Mapi whispered urgently. Ingrid looked at her, confused and unmoving. 

“What? I was in the middle of a conversation, María,” the Norwegian scolded. 

“I know, it’s your Solstråle, though, she’s upset, come on,” Mapi insisted, pulling on Ingrid’s hand, who finally seemed to feel a sense of urgency, and let Mapi lead her into the building. 

“Upset? Why? Did something happen?” 

“She saw you with my mom and just looked really upset.” Mapi explained. A bit of understanding washed over Ingrid’s face, and now she was the one leading her girlfriend, rushing down the hall and beginning to open door after door in search of you. 

Caro, meanwhile, had found you pretty easily. You were on the floor of a room she often came to when she was overwhelmed, although that happened much less these days. You knew Caro, obviously, and she knew you, had known you since you were pretty young. She had a calming presence, and the minute she sat next to you, and extended her hand in your direction, you took it gratefully. 

“Mapi is bringing Ingrid.” She told you, but didn’t say anything else. She just sat next to your trembling form and held your hand.  It was enough for now, enough until your sister arrived. 

And when Ingrid did arrive, it was with a loud bang as she threw the door open, sighing in relief at the sight of you. Though, that relief quickly dissolved back into worry at the state you were in. She quickly took Caro’s place at your side, hesitantly wrapping an arm around your shoulders. Your sister was surprised when you turned and threw your arms around her neck, crying silently into her shirt. 

“Jeg har deg, kjære. Det er greit, du er ok.” She murmured, looking worriedly at the other two women hovering in the doorway of the room. Mapi nodded at her encouragingly, and Ingrid refocused, rubbing a hand slowly up and down your back. 

“Thank you,” Mapi muttered to Caro, as they both stepped into the hall to give you some space. 

“Of course.” Caro said easily. “She having a hard time?” 

“Which one?” Mapi asked wryly. “Yes. It’s… it’s a work in progress.” 

“She’s a good kid.” Caro noted, Mapi nodding her head in agreement. “Well, Marta and I are around if either of you need anything.” 

“Thank you, Caro. Really.” Mapi said, squeezing the forward’s shoulder. Caro just shrugged like it was no big deal, and headed back out to the pitch. When Mapi reentered the room, you were tucked perfectly into Ingrid’s lap, although you seemed to have calmed down some. Ingrid was speaking to you in hushed Norwegian, and something she said had you lurching away from her and to your feet, stumbling blindly to the door. 

“Solstråle, wait,” Ingrid called, not really sure what she said to upset you, but well aware that it had been something. You fell right into Mapi’s arms, and though she looked a little startled, she easily pulled you close. 

“Okay, it’s alright. We’re all okay.” She murmured, noticing the rather heartbroken expression on her girlfriend’s face at the fact that you had fled from her right into Mapi’s arms. After a few minutes, you said something quietly that neither girl could hear. “What was that, nena?”

“Can we go ho- back to the house?” You asked, correcting yourself quickly, and pulling away from the comforting embrace Mapi had you in. Ingrid felt like you’d stabbed her, honestly, when you didn’t let yourself call it home. You were stoic again, though, your face void of emotion, wiping roughly at your cheeks to rid them of tears. 

“Kjære,” Ingrid said, hating the way you forced all evidence of your breakdown away. You’d been so upset, about something, but now you were acting as though nothing had happened. Your sister would have climbed into your brain if she could’ve, just to understand what was going on in there. 

“Let’s go home.” Mapi said easily, shooting her girlfriend a meaningful look. Ingrid wasn’t supposed to push you, she knew that. It was just getting harder and harder to not do so, especially when she could see how much pain you were in. She couldn't understand why you wouldn’t just talk to her, and you couldn’t understand why she was so concerned or why she was so desperate to hear what you were feeling. And considering it was the two of you, the situation was bound to blow up into an argument. It was just a matter of time. 

-------

Ingrid knew what was coming before her phone rang, but she still desperately wanted to avoid it. She was quite comfortable at the moment, curled up on top of Mapi in their bed, a show playing softly in the background. Mapi was scratching lightly at Ingrid’s scalp with one hand, and tracing lines over her back with the other. The movements made Ingrid’s entire body relax, which had definitely been Mapi’s goal, but it was all interrupted when her phone went off from next to her. 

She sat up off her girlfriend, glancing at the screen, her expression hardening. 

“Your mom?” Mapi guessed, pulling Ingrid back down into her when the Norwegian declined the call. 

“Yes.”

“You haven’t talked to her since Solstråle’s letter, have you?” 

“No.” Ingrid said. “I think I hate her right now.” 

Mapi was surprised, only because Ingrid didn’t hate anyone. If there was going to be a person, though, it would be someone who had hurt you. Because Ingrid didn’t like to kill spiders she found in the house, but Mapi knew she would kill a person for you without a second thought. “That’s okay. You can hate her.” 

“I miss her.” Ingrid admitted after another minute, her voice cracking. Her forehead was scrunched with sadness, and her hands gripped Mapi’s shirt tight in her hands. 

Mapi sighed, wishing she could take Ingrid’s pain away. And yours too, for that matter. “You can miss her too. You can feel whatever you need to feel.” 

“No, I can’t, not when Solstråle is so upset,” 

“How your sister feels does not limit how you feel. You can be hurt, and sad, and frustrated too. It doesn’t take away from pequeña’s feelings. Just like her feelings don’t take away from yours. You are both upset. That’s alright.” Mapi said confidently. “This isn’t just happening to your sister. It’s happening to you, too, and you can be sad, mi amor. You can cry.” 

Ingrid hadn’t even known she’d been about to cry until Mapi said that, but suddenly there were tears running down her face, and she was clutching tightly to the Spaniard underneath her, who did not seem surprised at all at the sudden emotion. 

“I know, baby.” Mapi husked, pressing kiss after kiss to the top of Ingrid’s head. She knew Ingrid needed this, and was content to let her cry it out until she heard a sharp breath from the doorway. You were standing just outside the room, frozen and horrified. 

“I’m sorry, Ing,” you mumbled, having come in to say goodnight, rather stunned to see your sister so distraught. 

Ingrid could only cry harder, now furious with herself for letting you see this, but too upset to do anything but squeeze Mapi’s hand, wordlessly begging for her to do something. 

“Ven aqui, nena, it’s alright.” Mapi said, gesturing you over to the bed. You looked skeptical, but you did so anyway, carefully sitting on the bed next to your sister. 

“I’m really sorry, Ingrid, I don’t mean to stress you out.” You whispered. You were in a guilty mood, it seemed, not an angry one, and Ingrid felt that somehow, she preferred when you were angry to this. 

“Don’t apologize, pequeña. You haven’t done anything wrong. Ingrid is upset, and you’re upset. It’s okay to be upset, and it’s okay to cry.” Sometimes, Mapi felt like she was teaching preschoolers how to identify and express their emotions when she talked to the both of you, though that might be an easier task.

“I’m not upset with you, Solstråle, I am upset with mom, and I am upset with myself. You don’t need to say sorry. Not for having a panic attack, for having a hard time, for any of it.” Ingrid managed then, taking your hand in hers. 

“I’m doing my best.” You said. “I know I’m not making it easy, but I promise I’m trying.” 

“We know you are. You’re doing so well, nena.” Mapi said enthusiastically, with so much excitement at you saying something remotely positive about yourself that you and Ingrid both cracked smiles. 

“Do you want to talk about it?” Ingrid asked after a minute. At that, you withdrew, pulling your hand from Ingrid’s and rising from the bed. Both your sister and her girlfriend repressed sighs at your sudden withdrawal. 

“No, I’m really tired. I came to say goodnight. I’ll see you guys in the morning.” You rushed out, before bolting out of the room at a speed that could barely be considered a walk. 

Ingrid sighed once you were out of earshot, settling back into Mapi. “She’s so difficult.”

“She’s stubborn. Like her sister. She’ll come around, just give her time.” Mapi assured her. 

Giving you time, though, was a lot harder than it seemed. 

-------

Your whole life, you had been encouraged by your parents to be smaller, to take up less space. If you were upset, you should keep it to yourself. If you were angry, you should calm down. You were taught that your needs always came second to everyone else’s. You didn’t like to be vulnerable with people, and you didn’t like to put your emotions on others. 

So when you woke up the next day, it was the feeling of intense shame swirling around inside of you. You’d ruined what was an impressive win for your sister, and a nice moment with Mapi’s parents. You’d upset Ingrid, so much so that she had cried about it. 

Too much. You were being too much. 

You resolved yourself to be happy today. If not happy, content. Mapi and Ingrid probably needed a day off from your ridiculous, all over the place, emotions. So today, you wouldn’t feel. You’d be perfect, you’d be small, and you’d cause as little trouble as possible. 

What you didn’t expect, though, was for that to be the opposite of what Mapi and Ingrid wanted from you. They didn’t care if you took up space. They just wanted you to talk. More than anything, they just wanted you to be okay, no matter how inconvenient that process was for them. 

It was a day off for both girls, due to the match the day before, and they were able to let you sleep in. Ingrid was worried you were sleeping too much, but Mapi assured her that angsty teens always needed a lot of sleep, and depressed teens going through a rough time needed even more sleep. Pair that with the intense panic attack you’d had the day before, you were bound to be exhausted. 

When noon rolled around, though, and you’d yet to make an appearance, Mapi relented, much to Ingrid’s relief, who had half a mind to check you for a pulse. Mapi made a coffee to bring up to you, opening your door quietly to find you out cold under the covers. 

With Snø clutched tightly in your arms, your nose pressed against the soft polar bear, you looked so young. 

“Pequeña, despierta,” Mapi murmured, sitting on the edge of your bed and pulling the covers away from your face a bit. 

You blinked up at her groggily, an adorably sleepy expression on your face, and Mapi couldn’t help but push some hair out of your face and smile down at you. You looked slightly suspicious, as you couldn’t remember being woken up like this in the entire time living in Spain, but Mapi just handed you your coffee, and settled on the edge of your bed. 

“Morning,” you said after a minute and a rather large sip of coffee. 

“Afternoon.” Mapi corrected, a little confused when your face turned red at the comment. “It’s 12:15.” 

“That’s weird. Normally Ingrid comes to make sure I’m breathing if I sleep past 10.” You noted. 

Mapi chuckled. “We’re working on some of your sister’s annoying habits.” 

“Don’t get rid of too many, or there won’t be anything left.” You said, your lips tugging up into a smirk. 

“Okay! I will just go through this chocolate croissant I made for you in the garbage!” Ingrid scoffed from the doorway, turning on her heel and marching back down the stairs. 

If there was any surefire way to get you out of bed, it was to present you with a breakfast pastry. 

Within 90 seconds, you had kicked Mapi out, thrown some clothes on and bounded down the stairs, in search of the promised croissant. It was sitting on a plate at the counter, waiting for you, next to your sister who was glaring at you slightly. 

“Thank you, Ing,” you said sweetly, throwing her a charming smile. She rolled her eyes but smiled nonetheless. 

You hit Mapi’s hand playfully when she reached for your croissant, and she withdrew it with a laugh. “You’re like breakfast pastries the way Ingrid is about coffee.” 

“Reasonable? Reasonably attached to it? Is that what you mean, María?” Ingrid asked with a frown. 

“Of course, mi amor.” Mapi said with a smile, kissing Ingrid’s cheek softly. You averted your eyes, but you couldn’t lie and say that it didn’t make you happy to see your sister loved so well. 

The morning, or afternoon, was going exactly as you’d hoped. No attempts at conversation. No feelings. Of course, it couldn’t last. Once you’d finished eating, Ingrid perked up and seemed to prepare herself for what she was about to say, which instantly made you weary. 

“We should talk about last night, kjære.” Ingrid said calmly. 

You froze, slowly putting your mug back on the counter. Both other girls watched the way your whole body tense, the way every ounce of emotion was wiped off your face. 

“I’m fine. There’s nothing to talk about.” You said stiffly. 

“That is not true. Something upset you, and we should discuss it.” Ingrid argued. 

“Ingrid, it’s fine. Just leave it. We don’t need to talk about that. We don’t need to talk about anything.” You replied defensively. 

“It’s not fine!” Ingrid said, raising her voice, and shaking off Mapi’s gestures to calm down. “None of this is fine. We need to talk about last night. We need to talk about the letter you wrote. We need to get you in therapy. These are all things that need to happen, solstråle. We’ve given you time, now we need to do this.” 

“I am not going to therapy.” You declared, standing up with a scoff and crossing your arms across your chest. “Ingrid, I am fine. I don’t need to talk and I don’t need help.” 

Ingrid grew visibly more angry with you at that, throwing her arms up in the air in frustration. 

“Amor, take a breath.” Mapi said quietly, sighing to herself when Ingrid did not do so. 

“You don’t need help? That is the most untrue thing I have ever heard. You do not write the things that you wrote and then turn around and say you’re fine. You. Need. Help.” 

“Ingrid. I am not going to therapy, and I am done talking about this.” You said, your voice dangerously quiet. 

Your sister wasn’t phased, stepping closer to you with her eyes narrowed. “You will go to therapy if I say you will, and this conversation is not over until I say it is.” 

In retrospect, even Ingrid realized that this was decidedly the wrong thing to say. You didn’t take well to being told what to do. Your reaction really should have been worse; Ingrid had gotten off easy. 

“Jesus, Ingrid, do you hear yourself? You sound just like mom.” You spit back, feeling a bit of satisfaction at the hurt that flashed across your sister’s face. “I don’t want to talk about this, especially not with you.” You spun around and began stomping towards the stairs. “Don’t fucking follow me.” You warned over your shoulder, causing Ingrid’s jaw to drop. 

“Do not-” Ingrid began, starting after you. 

“Amor, leave her.” Mapi said, intervening before Ingrid got very far, and pulling her back. 

“She is the most frustrating person on the planet.” Ingrid huffed, slamming a hand down onto the counter. Mapi looked unimpressed. 

“She is probably thinking the same thing about you right now. I told you not to push her.” 

Ingrid rolled her eyes. “Could you be on my side here for once?” She asked bitingly. 

Mapi very calmly shook her head, opening her mouth to explain when Ingrid’s eyebrows flew up on her forehead. “No. I am on your sister’s side, and you should be too. No one has been for a really long time.”

The Norwegian deflated at that, sinking down into one of the stools at the counter. Mapi continued speaking, pulling Ingrid’s hair gently out of the bun it was in, and running her fingers through it. “You’re looking at this wrong, mi amor. She doesn’t need you to talk her into therapy. She’ll get there on her own, you just need to give her time. That girl has a long way to go before she admits she needs help, believe me.” 

Ingrid sighed deeply. “Can you go check on her? She’s mad at me, I just need you to make sure she’s okay and she isn’t going to do anything stupid.” 

“Of course.” Mapi said, delicately kissing Ingrid’s lips. “I love you.” She reminded the Norwegian with a soft, almost shy smile. 

Ingrid wanted to cry at how sweet, how perfect, how helpful and kind and funny and beautiful her girlfriend was. “I love you, so so much.” 

Mapi headed for the stairs, and Ingrid made yet another cup of coffee, a coffee she wouldn’t drink.

Because Mapi came running back down the stairs a minute later, an apprehensive look on her face as she approached her girlfriend. 

“Mi amor, she isn’t up there.” She said carefully. 

“What do you mean she isn’t up there,” Ingrid asked, rising to her feet and feeling panic rise within her. 

Mapi just shook her head, putting her hands on Ingrid’s shoulders. “She isn’t up there. Her window is open, I think she snuck out.” 

Ingrid felt like something inside of her was collapsing, leaving behind a chasm that was quickly filling with anxiety. “Where… what? She… she’s gone? She…we have to-” 

What had you left to do? Only horrible, life shattering options of where you were and what you were doing were flying through Ingrid’s head, and she reached out, latching on to Mapi’s outstretched hands. 

“Amor, breathe. Calm down. We’ll find her. Where would she go?” 

Mapi hoped, with everything in her, that Ingrid had an answer. Because she had to be calm right now, for Ingrid, but Barcelona was a big city. And if you didn’t want to be found… Mapi didn’t know what would happen. 

Ingrid’s mind was racing, but one thought pushed to the front of everything else. “The lake, there’s a lake in Melhus she would always go to when she was upset. She’d go to water, a body of water.” 

Mapi nodded. “Okay, there are 2 beaches in walking distance, in opposite directions. We’ll go to one, and we’ll send Frido to the other.” 

Privately, Mapi hoped Frido found you first. She wasn’t quite sure that you wouldn’t bolt away from Ingrid, but you wouldn’t be expecting Frido to pop up. 

-------

A quick call to Frido later, Mapi was directing one very frazzled Norwegian into the car, and setting off for the beach. Ingrid was deep in thought, and Mapi kept her hand on her girlfriend’s leg, softly and soothingly rubbing her thumb back and forth. It was only a few minutes to the beach, and Mapi knew Ingrid would talk before they arrived. 

“Do you think she’d do something stupid?” Ingrid asked anxiously, her hand covering Mapi’s and gripping tightly. The Spaniard didn’t need her to explain what she meant; she knew this question was coming, really. 

“She said she wouldn’t.” Mapi said calmly. 

“She said she wouldn’t ‘do that to me,’ that doesn’t mean she wouldn’t do it, especially now that she’s mad at me.”

“This is a little fight. She wouldn’t… do that. Not over this.” Mapi reassured her, but Ingrid remained unconvinced. 

“I don’t know what she’s thinking, María, maybe she was lying before.” 

“Ingrid, mi amor, calm down. You have to trust her. Even when you’re scared, and even when it feels like you should take her bedroom door off the hinges and implant her with a GPS chip. You have to trust her not to hurt herself.”

“But what if she does?” Ingrid asked softly, as if saying the words loud enough would somehow will it into existence. 

“We can’t think like that. Promise me you won’t think like that, okay?” 

“Okay.” Ingrid agreed faintly. Both of them knew she was lying. It was all she’d been worrying about for days, and all she would worry about for many to come. 

--------

Frido found you first. When she drove by the beach and didn't see you there, she got another idea. There was a rock climbing place nearby; Ingrid had said you always used to go to a lake back home when you were upset. Though Frido didn’t want to say so, it had been a long time since Ingrid had lived with you, and it wouldn’t have surprised her if your habits had changed. And the Swede knew from your instagram that you spent a lot of time rock climbing. She told Mapi where she was headed, and sped over to the gym. 

Sure enough, as soon as she walked in the building, she spotted you in the middle of the hardest wall, seemingly only using the smallest holds to get yourself up. You were breathing hard, and the worker belaying you looked a bit concerned. 

Frido pulled her phone out, shooting off a quick text to Mapi.  “She’s here, she’s okay. Let me talk to her, don’t let Ingrid come in. I’ll bring her out.” 

Ingrid probably wouldn’t help the situation, if you were as angry as you seemed. The blonde spoke quickly to the front desk attendant, and headed over to where you were. 

She stood, just watching you. You were a few feet from the top now, luckily for your hands, which you clearly had not put enough chalk on, and were beginning to really hurt. With only a bit to go, you took a risk, attempting an impressive, one armed pull to get your other hand to the next hold. You just barely missed, falling away from the wall. 

“Fuck,” you cursed, swinging back towards the wall and smacking it with your hand. You were lowered down, clearly fuming, and Frido took the opportunity to step in front of you, giving the girl attached to the other end of the rope a look. 

“Again,” you requested, avoiding Frido’s gaze. 

She took your hand in hers, though, inspecting the tear in your skin, shaking her head. “No, that’s enough Solstråle.” 

“Leave me alone, Frido.” You snapped, trying to pull away from her when you felt the rope fall slack. You turned, seeing that the worker had abandoned her harness in favor of going to help someone else, no doubt at Frido’s direction. 

You rolled your eyes, quickly regretting it when the Swede raised an eyebrow at you. Ingrid could be scary sometimes, but she had nothing on Frido. 

“Are they here?” You asked, loosening the harness and stepping out of it with an exasperated sigh. 

“They’re outside. You terrified your sister.” Frido said, pulling you over to a bench and making you sit down, before handing you a bottle of water. 

You looked unimpressed. “I’m 18, I can handle myself in the city for an hour.” 

“She wasn’t worried about that, she was worried you were going to hurt yourself.” Frido said bluntly, sitting down next to you. She ignored how stiff you’d grown and how uncomfortable you seemed, reaching for your hand and looking at it critically. 

“That wasn’t on purpose.” You said defensively, wrenching your hand away once again. “And I told her I wouldn’t do that.” 

“Can you blame her for worrying, Solstråle, really? And maybe you didn’t do that on purpose, but you came here to push yourself instead of dealing with your feelings in a healthy way.” 

You really hated that she was right. Frido was always right. It was simultaneously her worst and best trait.

“Are they mad?” You asked in a small voice, suddenly looking very much your age. Frido stood and held out a hand to help you up.

“Not right now. Just worried. Ingrid’s going to give you a hug and you’re going to let her.” Frido instructed. You supposed that was fair. And really, you could use a hug. Hugs from your sister always made you feel better, even if you’d never admit it. 

As you exited the building, you instantly spotted your sister and her girlfriend by their car. Mapi was leaning calmly against the Cupra, while Ingrid was pacing frantically, speaking fast and gesturing wildly with her hands. 

“Did I do that?” You asked quietly. 

Frido laughed. “I think she was born like that.” 

As you neared the car, Ingrid turned as Mapi pointed at you, her face melting with relief at the sight of you. It really hit you, then, how worried she must have been, to still be so anxious even after Frido had likely told her you were okay. You weren’t making this easy on your sister. 

She practically knocked you over with the force of her hug. “You’re okay.” She murmured into the top of your head, leaving a kiss there. 

“I’m okay.” You reiterated, letting yourself hug her back tightly, even if it was just for a moment. She felt you tighten your arms around her almost unconsciously, and made a note to hug you more often. Even if it seemed like you weren’t very interested. After a minute she pulled back, placing both hands on your cheeks and making you look at her. 

“Next time leave through the front door? And tell me where you’re going? Please?” She asked. You appreciated that she didn’t tell you to do this, leaving it more as a request, although you knew it was a reasonable rule for her to put in place.

“Promise.” You said quietly. She nodded her head, satisfied, before pulling Frido into a hug that also looked to be too tight. Mapi was looking at you, rather unimpressed. You knew she was not happy with you for upsetting your sister so much, and though it annoyed you a bit, you knew it was deserved. And you appreciated that your sister had someone that was so protective over her. 

“In the car, nena. I want to talk to you when we get home.” Mapi instructed. You got in the car with no argument, the fight having gone out of you a bit. It had nothing to do with the hug Ingrid had given you, nothing at all. Definitely not. Instead of anger, you only felt apprehension, because Mapi looked dead serious about whatever she wanted to talk about. 

-------

You were nothing short of shocked when Mapi opened the door to the garage and gestured you inside upon arriving home. Ingrid watched on anxiously, and you pretended not to see the way Mapi whispered some reassurance to her and kissed her cheek, before pointing her towards the kitchen

You’d never been in the garage before; it was Mapi’s space. You were already invading her home, you wouldn’t invade the one place of the house that was really hers, too. You knew she worked something out there, knew there was a reason both cars parked in the driveway instead of in the garage. 

Mapi followed you into the room and sat down on a stool next to the large motorcycle in the middle of the garage. It was clearly in the process of being restored. You hadn’t known Mapi rode motorcycles. Well, you hadn’t known that your sister let Mapi ride a motorcycle. You stood awkwardly in the door as Mapi inspected 2 different wrenches, until she pointed at the stool next to her. 

“Ven aqui, nena.” She said. 

You took a seat, not really enjoying the tense silence that washed over the room. “Are you mad at me?” You asked after a minute. For all your anger, and all your bravado, you didn’t like it when people were mad at you. Especially not people you looked up to, people you admired. 

“No. Not mad, nena. Never mad. I wish you hadn’t snuck out your window, but I understand why you did. I wish sometimes you thought a bit more about how your actions affect me and your sister, but I know how hard that is to do when you’re as angry as you are.” 

“I’m not angry.” You said defensively. Mapi rolled her eyes, handing you a couple of tools and beginning to tighten something on the bike. 

“You are angry. You’re so angry that you feel like you’re going to explode sometimes. You’re so angry that sometimes you forget that you’re sad, too. You’re angry, and you’re hurt, and I cannot blame you for that. If anyone has a right to those emotions, it’s you.” You didn’t really enjoy being perceived so well, shifting uncomfortably in your seat. “I know angry, nena. Do you remember when I hurt my knee?” 

You nodded. The first few weeks of Mapi's injury hadn’t been a fun time, your sister beyond stressed with dealing with Mapi’s injury and her new role in the team, and you’d tried hard to be on your best behavior. 

“I started working on this bike a year ago, when everything happened with the Spanish federation. It was Ingrid’s idea, a way for me to distract myself. When I hurt my knee, it had been a bit since I’d worked on it, but suddenly I was back in this garage until all hours of the night. It’s nice to be able to control something like this, when everything else feels out of your control. That is how climbing is for you, yes?” 

You relaxed a bit at the turn the conversation was taking, and Mapi wasn’t surprised. It wasn’t just the topic; it was the fact that she wasn’t staring at you, putting pressure on you to give her an answer she wanted to hear. You were just talking. Casually. 

“Yeah. I’m in control, and I don’t have to think about anything else. It’s relaxing.” 

“It’s good for you to have an outlet like that.” Mapi stated. “This bike was Ingrid’s idea, when we first got together. Do you know what her other idea was?” 

You were pretty sure you did, and you grimaced at the thought. “Therapy?” 

Mapi snorted, handing you the wrench she was using and taking the screwdriver from your hand. “Yes therapy. You don’t have to look at it like that, though, it doesn’t have to be a bad thing.”

“It’s not for me.” You said decisively. 

Mapi just shrugged. “I didn’t think it was for me either.” She paused, knowing your curiosity would get the better of you, and you’d ask for more information. 

“What changed your mind?” You asked after a minute. 

“Your sister did. After the euros, I had a hard time coming back to Barça and playing. Those weeks were some of the hardest of my life, trying to find my rhythm again but trying to recover from the stress I’d been under that summer. I was a mess. And Ingrid was right there with me, through all of it. I’d had a really bad day, and I asked Ingrid to come home early from a lunch she had. She came home, calmed me down, and afterwards, she asked me if I trusted her. I said I did. And she said that she really wanted me to try therapy. That I didn’t have to feel how I felt, and I deserved help. I deserved to not be miserable. She asked me to try it, for her, just give it a try.” 

“And you did.” 

“And I did. Because she’d done so much for me, I couldn’t refuse her request. Not when I knew she just wanted the best for me. I gave it a shot, and it helped, more than anything else had helped. It wasn’t a fix all, but it helped. It made me feel like I was doing something to get better.” 

Mapi abandoned her work on the bike, looking at you for the first time since you’d entered the garage. You could only see sincerity in her gaze. Not anger, but annoyance. Just sincerity. “You deserve help, Solstråle. No matter how you feel about yourself, Ingrid and I know you. And we know you deserve help. You’re a good person, and you deserve to be happy.” 

María sounded so sure. So completely convinced. You looked away from her, blinking hard. 

“You don’t have to agree to anything now. Keep an open mind about it. Think about it. Okay?” 

“Okay.” You agreed quietly, grateful that Mapi didn’t make a big deal out of it, only nodding slightly. 

“One more promise?” She asked. 

“What?” 

“Talk to us. Or just me, or just Ingrid. We’re a little lost here, nena. It feels like we were just kind of plopped down in the middle of this. We had no idea anything was going on, not really. And all of a sudden we’re reading that letter, and realizing we missed a lot. That’s on us; we should have noticed sooner. We don’t have the whole picture, though, and that makes it really hard for us to figure out how to help you. We’ll both worry a lot less if you talked to us, just a little bit.” 

That was reasonable, you had to admit. When she put it like that. You’d spent so much time being annoyed that no one had noticed, then being annoyed when they finally did notice, you hadn’t really spent a ton of time thinking about how little they knew. There was no context to your behavior, aside from what you’d put in the letter. And that just barely scratched the surface. You supposed they deserved an explanation. At least a bit of one. 

“I’ll try.” You promised. 

Mapi grinned at you this time, an infectious smile. “Bueno! Come here with that wrench. No, that one. Put it on this bolt. Twist.” 

And just like that, the conversation was over. Easily. You got the feeling that Mapi would have let it go if you’d insisted on it, but you miraculously felt better. Talking, listening had made you feel better. Mapi had made you feel better. 

-------

You both emerged from the garage around an hour and a half later, when the smell of baking cookies became too strong to resist. Ingrid had clearly been stress baking, one of your favorite of her habits. There were at least 3 different types of cookies on the counter, some done baking, some still in progress. It smelled so distinctly of home in the house, it was almost overwhelming. 

“I have something for you,” Ingrid said, drying her hands and stepping away from the counter when you walked into the room. 

“I can see that.” You said, nodding to the cookies appreciatively, but Ingrid shook her head. 

“No, something else.” Ingrid said.

“OH! I do too.” Mapi said excitedly, and they both disappeared in different directions. You stood bewildered in the kitchen, not quite sure what you were about to be given. 

They returned simultaneously, each holding what looked to be 2 frames. “Mapi’s first.” Ingrid directed. “I haven’t seen it yet.” 

You looked surprisingly at Mapi, taking the present and beginning to unwrap the wrapping paper. “What is this for?” You asked. 

“Your birthday.” Ingrid said quietly. You froze momentarily, an unreadable expression flashing across your face. “I know it seems like we forgot, but we didn’t. We got the dates messed up, but we had presents, and we had dinner reservations, just… for the 25th. Not the 15th.” 

“Oh. I thought you’d forgotten.” You said slowly, seemingly slightly emotional. 

“Nope, just bad at remembering dates. Now open your present.” Mapi said impatiently, bouncing on her feet like an overexcited child. 

You unwrapped it slowly, as if you were slightly weary of what it might be. When you pulled the frame from the wrapping paper, though, every wall you’d put up fell instantly, your jaw dropping open at the piece of art in your hands. 

It was a map. Not just a map, but a map of all the hiking trails in Barcelona. It was textured, detailed, labeled. It was intricate, all neutrals and earthy colors. It was so you. From the contents to the design, it was like it had been made just for you. 

“Mapi…” You whispered, staring, stunned, at the map. “Where did you… how did you… what?” 

“Ale’s sister Fresa  went to school with this girl that hand makes maps like this. I got her name from diablillo, and I told her what I wanted. Do you like it, do you like it?” Mapi asked excitedly. 

Mapi got her answer when you handed the frame to Ingrid, and launched yourself the few feet between you and Mapi, wrapping her in a tight hug. Mapi beamed at Ingrid, who was trying very hard not to cry. She hadn’t even given Mapi any advice on the gift. It had been all her girlfriend’s idea, she executed it all by herself, determined to get Solstråle the perfect gift. 

“It’s perfect, thank you María,” you mumbled. The ridiculous smile on Mapi’s lips didn’t falter at the use of her real name, only squeezing you tighter. 

“Te amo, Solstråle.” She said back. For once, you believed it. When you pulled away from the hug, it was to see Mapi looking smugly at your sister. “INGRID I DEFINITELY WON.”

Ingrid rolled her eyes. “She hasn’t even opened my present yet.”

“Still. I won.” Mapi smirked. 

Now it was Ingrid’s turn to hand you your gift. It was wrapped in the same paper, and you tore it off, almost cautiously, not quite sure what Ingrid would have gotten you. 

You were, once again, speechless at what you saw. This time, your eyes filled with tears immediately. Ingrid wasn’t as excited as Mapi had been, instead looking at you anxiously. 

It was a painting of a waterfall back home not far from your house. It was so distinct, you knew Ingrid must have paid a ridiculous amount of money to get someone to hand paint it. Each individual stroke was so precise, blending perfectly into the image it was supposed to be, but if you focused hard, you could pick out the greens and greys and blues and whites that you’d grown up with. 

It felt like home. It felt comforting. You could almost smell the trees, feel the cool sting of wind on your cheeks. It was a little piece of home just for you, and it was perfect. So beautiful and artistic that you weren’t sure you were worthy of it, but you looked at it in awe nonetheless. You wiped at your cheeks, not able to control the tidal wave of emotion washing over you. 

“Kjære? Is it okay?” Ingrid asked anxiously, her eyes searching your face, trying to figure out if these were good tears or bad tears. 

You let out an incredulous laugh. “Okay? Ingrid… it’s the most perfect thing I’ve ever seen in my life. It’s… perfect. Thank you.” You said, turning to her with a look of complete shock. And even though it pained Ingrid that you were so surprised to receive a nice gift for your birthday, she pushed that feeling down. Instead, she pulled you in towards her, placing the frame on the counter so she could hug you properly. You were happy with it, now, and that was all Ingrid had control over. 

After a few seconds, Ingrid moved to pull away and break the hug, but you kept your arms wrapped around her, not quite ready to let go yet. Maybe it was the homesickness, or maybe it was your sister making you feel so known, and so loved. Whatever the reason, you just wanted her near you for a minute more, holding you nice and tight and safe against her. 

“I love you,” she whispered, hearing you mumble the words back, your voice thick with emotion. When you did pull away, a minute later, it was to wipe at your face in an almost embarrassed manner. 

Seeing how desperate you were for the attention to be off your tears, Mapi spoke up, her voice light and easy. “You can put them up in your room, you don’t have anything on the walls.” 

You looked at the ground, then, almost sheepishly. “I didn’t know I could put anything up on them.” You admitted.

The room fell quiet, but even though you could tell that what you said had hurt Ingrid and Mapi, they just shook their heads softly. “It’s your room, for good, you can do whatever you want to it.” Ingrid told you. 

You were about to thank her, and try to move the conversation long when Mapi let out a dramatic gasp. Both you and Ingrid whipped your heads to look at her, confused at the mischievous grin on her face. 

“Ikea. WE CAN GO TO IKEA AND GET FURNITURE FOR SOLSTRÅLE’S ROOM.” 

“María, calm down. Maybe she doesn’t want to redo her room.” Ingrid looked at you hopefully, and you knew it had nothing to do with your room, and everything to do with her not wanting to take Mapi to ikea. 

You simply smirked back at Ingrid, who sighed and shut her eyes for a minute. 

“Okay. Ikea.” She said finally. You and Mapi cheered, comically loudly, completely ignoring the rules she was setting in favor of high fiving each other and going to get ready to leave. “María, you are not building anything. Solstråle does not need her bed to collapse under her in the middle of the night. And kjære, please, please, don’t let Mapi talk you into a loft bed, you’ll fall off of it and break your arm. Amor? Kjære? ARE EITHER OF YOU LISTENING!” Ingrid shouted after you, rolling her eyes at the chants of ikea echoing around the house. 

Mapi in Ikea was a handful. You, too, were a handful at the store. Together? She was going to lose one of you, she was sure of it. It had been a long day already. And it was only set to get longer. 

--------

fluffy engen-león family trying to put furniture together in the next part?

yes, that IS all i have to say about this chapter thank you for your time.

[berriesandjunnie]

omg dahlia i just saw u on my dash!! imy lots and i hope you’ve been well 🥺💖 welcome back!!

hi sol omg 🥺 i’m not doing hot in general but right now it’s firework night in the uk and my anxiety is going ballistic bc of my rabbits so i’m hiding on tumblr 😖

not going to sleep? work on a fic you’ve had in drafts for like four months now 😃

[punkeropercyjackson]

Siblings!Ghost Flower(Miles Morales and Gwen Stacy)moodboard aka my favorite kind of Ghostflower

[misc-obeyme]

it’s 🍓 anon! i’d like to talk about my MC :)

his name is Tommy. He’s tall asf with black hair down to his waist and is missing an eye from a birth defect. he has a large scar over it from an incident when he was younger.

he’s a real sweetheart but in the “acts of service” and “quality time” ways instead of verbally expressing it or being outward with it. i wouldn’t say “tsundere”, he just genuinely doesn’t know how to express emotions most times or how to say things but he’s doing his best. he enjoys being in social areas even if he’s not super social (he likes feeling included), and blunt as hell, too.

i like the idea of him and Azzy together because you have this gorgeous demon and his… weird human bf hat is WAY too quick to try to fight anything. throw solomon in the mix and… i just think it’d be a fun trio. the three of them or Tommy and Barb is a fun dynamic too… even him and Luci… i can’t make my mind up LOL

him and Belphie got mad beef though. he definitely never forgives him for choking him out. sorry Beel.

OHHH he sounds so interesting!!

I totally get that not tsundere, but just kinda emotionally repressed lol. But if you can figure out what his expression of love is, such as with acts of service, you can tell that he feels love even if he doesn't say it! I think Asmo would pick that up pretty well, personally.

Making up your mind is soooo hard when it comes to who your MC is dating. I mean I dunno I'm sure there are people who have their one and only, but I'm constantly changing my mind about who my MC is dating lol.

But I also think it's fun to explore all the possibilities. Like maybe your MC exists in different timelines and therefore can date a different character (or group of characters) in each one!

And yeah I get it about Belphie... sorry Beel indeed lol!

[yandere-wishes]

⋆｡˚ ☁︎ ˚｡Acolyte⋆｡˚☽˚｡⋆

𐙚Yandere! Qimir/The Master x Reader

˚ʚ♡ɞ˚ Plot: Your loneliness is suffocating, engulfing. Qimir is the only one who seems to subdue the pain. But every forbidden fruit has its price.

⁀➷Warnings: Yandere behavior, gore, angst (at the end), author having an anxiety attack over this fic  

🪐Note: Why is the longest thing I've ever written for a fandom that barely exists? Anyway, here's the long-awaited Qimir piece!

⁺₊𝄞₊⁺ : Disturbia - Rihanna, Dark Vacay & Motion Picture Soundtrack - CAS

⁺‧₊˚ ཐི⋆🍓⋆ཋྀ ˚₊‧⁺

Your master's anger is tangible. You harbour it stubbornly on your tongue. Relishing in the frustration. You aren't sure how many times you've cut out your soul to place at a master's feet. Gnawing on perfect lips to keep quiet during another scolding. Your new master's disappointment reverberates through the room. Thick and oozing like an infected wound.

You messed up again.

"We do not injure other padawans during training. We do not lash out and attack, especially when your training partner has fallen. How have you trained for so long without comprehending these basics?"

The rage that boils inside you is not Jedi in nature. It's something else, a bizarre second, something ancient, ghoulish. An all-consuming fire that burns inside your veins. It shouldn't feel so welcoming, so familiar.

You roll your eyes.

"With all due respect master. How is one to win, if they do not strick when given the opportunity? That too should be a basic notion, no?"

You see the anger snake across your master's face. A defeated, disgruntled, glance that you've become a bit too acquainted with. This is the look that all your previous masters give you. And yet none have yet to master its eeriness quite as well as your first master. Master Sol.

Your master sighs, a piercing noise, deflating every ounce of his willpower. You are exhausting to be around, his annoyance is becoming discernible. "Master Sol is coming by the temple to check your...progress. He's requested a few items to take back with him. Please go fetch them from the apothecary."

Progress is a gentle word and Jedi love using gentle words. It's easier to say than the full truth. Sugar-coated things always taste better.

But the sugar refuses to stick to you.

It burns away in your bitterness.

Coruscant is a distant memory, it was never your home to begin with. But the high bustling volume is something that is hard to forget. Here things are quiet, you slip through the bazaar undetected. Small basket clutched tightly. You wonder what's dragging your former master halfway across the galaxy. You wonder if it's really just to see you.

You gaze blankly at the holographic list. A few rare herbs and some medical roots. This planet grows them in abundance, and the local apothecary carries more than its fair share.

The apothecary is an old, disheveled thing. The older Jedi say that its presence is as old as the temple itself. Odd how some things have a will of iron. You gently rap at the worn metal door, waiting for an invitation to enter. The hinges cry as the door opens ever so slightly. You squeeze in, surveying the cluttered den. Careful to avoid the half-empty bottles and neon puddles scattered across the floor.

"Excuse me" your voice holds an urgent annoyance. Where is the pharmacist? What kind of store owner abandons their shop in the midday? You run your fingers across the strange bottles, letting your nails pick at the murky glass. The colors flash, begging to be freed, strange space pinks, and summer oranges all trapped inside square prisons. Baby poisons dying to taste the world, burning it if they must, but experiencing it nonetheless, tasting their own form of freedom. Funny, they almost remind you of yourself.

Trapped and fatal.

"Hello?", the voice behind you is languid, dozy. Mirroring a late afternoon nap. When the man next speaks you notice a lyrical lint "What brings you here little lady?". You turn to see it, the voice, or rather the man harboring the voice. He's loosely robed and shaggy in the way that only the most spirited vagabonds are. He smiles tenderly upon seeing your face, strange red fruit caught between his teeth. "I um...I" you click your tongue anxiously against the roof of your mouth. Feeling around for those pesky words, in the end, you just shove the hologram holder forward, hoping he'll understand.

"Oh, I see, out here doing some chores?" You nod, mind preoccupied with the otherwordly fruit. "what's that?" you ask, schoolgirl curiosity lacing your voice. "What, this?" he asks holding the freckled thing between his fingers, it's only in the mild light that you notice the shimmering gold scattered across its red skin. The stranger laughs, walking closer, he places the hologram base on the black table, clicking it on as he studies the list. "They're called strawberries. They're from the forest planets, not many grow here in the mid-rims." He's nimble as he packs the herbs and roots, fumbling with the straw ties. "care for a bite" he asks, handing you the bitten fruit.

Hesitantly you bite.

Letting the sweetness erupt on your tongue.

"Thank you" you mumble trying not to moan at the foreign taste. The stranger laughs, it's a cheery noise like birds chirping in first bloom tress. "you're a Jedi, aren't you?" he asks stepping around the table, eyebrows furrowed, caught in a dream he doesn't seem to understand. You choke on the rogue static as he steps closer, eyes half-lidded dreaming of nothing. "Here..."

"Wha-" your voice catches in your throat, it's getting harder to breathe.

"Your supplies" He hands you the brown paper bag, motion a little too phlegmatic to be right.

"Oh, right...thanks" You anxiously shove the bag into your basket and scurry out of the shop. Holding your breath.

"Come back soon." the voice chirps behind you.

Your old master arrives by spaceship, a newer, albeit worn model. The landing pad ejects to reveal a small escort.

Master,

Knight,

Padwan,

Apostate,

You stand still watching as they descend. Bits of envy bubble in your throat watching your former master and his band of little heroes. You wish you had their belonging. Forgoing the loneliness to find kinsmanship with your coterie. You swallow down the bitter thoughts as they finally approach you.

Master Sol's smile reaches his eyes. Gentle and wise. The true epidemy of a Jedi in every sense of the word. Funny how he now has two failures under his belt. None of which are capable of scratching his shining repute.

His hands are on your shoulders, bright smile. "My padawan, it's been too long." You try to bow, awkwardly and stiffly. "Mater Sol, I'm grateful you've come to asses my progress". If he hears your doubt he doesn't show it. Instead, he reintroduces you to Yord, Jacki, Osha.

You try to be polite. Gulp down the awkwardness

You imagine the taste of strawberries on your tongue.

Remember their stiff sweetness and prickly tasteless freckles.

You smile. Easier this time.

They'll stay here for some time. Hunting assassins and documenting progress in their free time. Jacki seems more invested in your training than you are, trying to teach you everything she knows. At least she doesn't mind the rough play, the violent strikes, and sloppy prideful defenses. She speaks in pointers and parries. She's the one to drag you along these assassin hunts. Welcoming you...or at least trying to.

But there is something else at play. Darker, broader, Sol and Jecki welcome you into the fray. Yet you still feel your old master's hesitance, he's still wary of you. Worried about your anger, your defiance.

The distance grows, some icy void.

Sol used to tell you fairytales. This was back when you'd been young and bright-eyed. Freshly welcomed into the order and still overflowing with artless hope for a colorful future.

But even back then, he had known there was something wrong with you.

Looking back it was evident.

Every story started and ended the same. Little princess against the big bad world. Holding out until her prince came along. Only problem was the morals never registered right in your little messed-up brain.

Why didn't the princess fall for the dragon, the wolf, the tyrant king with a crown of bones? Why didn't she swoon and sigh over someone rousing, compelling? A paradox wrapped in black ember? Why settle for a sun-painted prince, with no complexities, no mysteries to unravel?

You would have married the dragon, or the wolf, or the tyrant king with a crown of bones.

Even back then, it was evident something was wrong.

The temple's roof isn't restricted per se.

It's rather abandoned as opposed to forbidden.

Maybe that's why you find solace here. The abandonment feels familiar, similar. The chipped cement kisses the soles of your feet, you imagine it's something like walking upon the rough terrain of a star.

You breathe in the night air deeply.

Expecting the fragile scents of moonshine and star glitter.

Instead, you choke on heavy mist and blood-drenched air.

The thing standing in front of you isn't human. It can't be human. It's created from the blackness, ebony in all the ways a living thing shouldn't be. For a second you think you're staring at a black hole. No doubt this creature crawled out of one.

What sheer willpower one must need to drag themselves out of endless nothingness?

"Little Jedi should not brave the night alone."

It speaks

"There are far too many monsters roaming in the dark"

Its face never moves, statue in all the ways the figures towering over the entrance aren't. This statue is something else, a lost page to some forgotten epic. Carved from gems born in darkness. Evil and rotten.

"What are you?" your voice susurrate, quivering in this surreal scene. The air is thicker now, overflowing with raw static.

Your fingers itch for your saber. Only when the cold metal kisses your palm do you regain some semblance of reality.

The hiss, the green light.

The figure chuckles.

Its voice bouncing from every direction. Everywhere all at once. When it speaks the air cackles, raining as if it were a frightened child.

"I am something akin to you, another child of the force" His voice comes out distorted, uneven in tone. "I am what's birthed when one learns of the true strength of the force."

Your body moves on its own, feet kicking the ground sprinting faster and faster before the final leap. You aim for the helmet, for the morbid toothy grin permanently etched within steel. In a flash the word stills, floating around you like fluorescent bubbles, the rain tumbles around you, curving and diving for the wet ground. It dares not land on something within his grasp.

You feel the slithering across your body. They start from the ground, summed from the unknown depths. Clinging firmly to your ankles before inching up your knees, your hips, your neck.

long, slipper tendrils curling around your body. The figure watches, bare arm outstretched. You should probably be focused on how the unseen things are inching closer to your mouth. Not on the toned muscles and limber fingers of the monster. Not on how, for a fraction of a heartbeat, his smile appears genuine, caring, aimed straight at you.

Only You

They finally reach your lips, prying your teeth ajar and flooding your mouth. Sinking deeper and deeper into your soul, your mind, you.

The smile grows.

In a blink you're suspended in the space between worlds, dark damning thing cradling your body.

"The dark side once belonged to the Jedi, yet they chose to discard it. Deeming it malignant, ungovernable."

Your weightlessness unnerves you. You're malleable in this void.

"Those few who embraced its calling were dubbed Sith." He says the word with such fervent pride. Devoted to it's weight and all it carries. You try to roll the word off your own tongue only for it to burn the roof of your mouth.

The stranger stalks closer, lethal and lithe.

The void vibrates, the darkness bends to his will.

He reaches down to cup your face. His fingers feel warm, welcoming. You nuzzle into his palm, fighting the urge to kiss each finger and suck on the dark force they emit. "You..." he starts, his voice shakes you to the core. Its horror amplifies with the proximity. You wonder if it'll cut through steel, armor, flesh.

your flesh.

"You aren't like the other temple dwellers. You have potential."

His thumb presses your lower lip, demanding entrancing. You comply, needing to feel something solid.

Something you've been denied your whole life.

"They keep you locked away. Trading you between craven masters. Seeing who can tame you first."

He nicks his thumb on your teeth,

Pressing bone into dentin.

His essence drips into you.

He tastes of power.

Of dark, dreadful things you can not name.

"They do not know how to train you. How to use your power..."

The world crumbles, ebony midnights giving way to reality. You feel yourself fall, plunging through the air like a comet bent on destruction.

"They only break you further"

Your knees collide with the harsh ground. Skin splintering in the aftermath giving way to bruises and bloodmarks.

The ground feels too solid beneath you.

A poly, a ruse.

You all but expect to melt through it. Slipping and falling into the vacuum, into him, once more.

He hovers above. Absolute in his strength. You're beginning to believe that blackholes birth divinity. Eyes shimmering with fanatic fidelity, staring up at the holy creature commanding the storm.

"Teach me..."

You've never begged for anything so terribly in your life.

But you need this.

this power

this control.

him.

Sol never told just how the princess met the villain.

He never said it wasn't love at first fright.

Sol insists that the local apothecary knows the truth behind the Jedi-killer. Definite that the unseemly man can tell you something important. He sends Osha inside to play Mea. To get the man to talk.

You crowd around the communicator urging back giggles. Yord's chin is placed upon your shoulder and Jecki's cheek rests against yours. Their touches come so early. And yet they are utterly alien.

"He will be so pleased." No sooner have the words chime from the corroded speakers that Sol is ushering you all towards the small metal hut.

Yord entwines his fingers with you as he runs.

Jacki wraps around your arm.

You feel at times they are trying to tame you.

Befriend the feral puppy they found in the backyard.

The apothecary's face is utterly stunned. He's stammering over his words fear glistening in his eyes as he stares at Sol. "Please, please don't wipe my memories. Or whatever it is you Jedi do." A rosy blush colors your cheeks, at his terror. It's terribly amusing seeing someone so carless, anxiously list off everything he knows. You almost feel bad for the poor scared man.

There isn't anything important here. But Sol decides that you will all return at midnight. The Jedi-killer will be back. Apparently, Qimir -that's his name, that the strawberry-eating, disheveled pharmacist's name- is holding something of value for her.

There's a tug on your wrist as you go to follow the others. Gentle and firm as he pulls you to his chest. "Come by tonight. I'll have some strawberries waiting for you." why does he feel too genuine? When you turn to look at him, he's painted in his usual sweet carefree smile that tugs at your heart.

He looks so innocent...

Starlight really brings out his eyes. He's laughing with a nervous smile,

School-boy crush on full display. You're licking strawberry juice from your hands as you listen to him talk. Backs pressed against the rusty wall and bodies half sprawled in the dirt. He's telling you about the first time the Hutts made him retrieve a plushie for their son from another solar system.

Qimir's voice feels like rose peddles melting into your skin. Sweet, jejeune, free. You offer him a berry from your pile. Watching tentatively as he submerges the red fruit into his mouth. Missing your fingers by an inch. He's laughing after the fact, head thrown back as if he's about to engulf the stars. You decide to laugh too.  

"Are you really that lonely," he says in a voice that's almost not his own. You're not expecting the invasive question, although you guess he means well. The words still cut deep. Piercing through the laughter, stunning you for a breath too long. "No...I'm a Jedi, we do not-"

"Form personal connection. I know...But you just look so lonely." He shuffles closer, the dirt particles almost look celestial in this light. Your fingers pitch a civil war. Pinching and clawing at each other. "No, yes. I don't really get along with the others." He rolls his eyes, bored and amused in the same breath. "Yeah, no wonder your money." He's picking at another strawberry, letting the crunch fill up the silence. You're beginning to think he just likes having something to chew on. Gulping down the anxiety with something toothsome.

He's a little closer now, fingers gingerly tucking back your hair. His fingerprints reverberate across the shell of your ear. Lips gliding against yours. You swallow as his lips fall across yours, pushing sweet stars past parted lips. He tastes of odd things, whimsy things. Everything you'll never come to understand. Xeno fruits and asteroid fields. His fingers glide up your arms, leaving moondust in their wake. He slowly parts, holding you softly with his soulful dark eyes

"You taste so sweet"

Strawberry, Starberry, You kiss him a little too deeply.

Maybe your new master is right.

Maybe there are other ways of being a Jedi.

The movie playing is doused in shades of rose and lilac. Gentle in all the ways. Everyway. The twi'lek girl is in love with the zabrak boy and their families do not approve. You think you remember Sol telling you a similar tale.  

The makeshift auditorium is cozy. Brown couch housing the three of you and your armada of blankets and popcorn buckets. Jacki's head is in your lap, you're playing with the end of her braid imagining the hair to be the lace of a Love-sick girl's ballgown. Yord's arm traverses the length of your arm, absentminded as he studies the motion picture, poking holes in the lose rose-tainted plot. Your head rests against his broad shoulder taking in his new cologne.

Maybe you really did miss them.

Jacki reaches for the popcorn, offering you some before shoving a handful into her mouth. You think the little symmetry-less kernels would taste better with a strawberry glaze. Qimir flashes across your mind, smiling sweetly as he tilts his head.

You think you're a little too similar to the star on screen.

Pinning after forbidden love,

Forbidden power.

Master Sol is growing acutely aware of your drastic improvements. He's noticed the betterment in your offense, your defense. To the way, you wield your saber, your techniques, and yourself. There is esteem in the way he smiles. In the words of praise, you've longed to hear. But you notice the lingering glances, the undertone of skepticism and worry when he asks about practice. He doesn't need to know of the black-glad creature that trains you in the unholy hours.

He doesn't need to know how beautifully your new master sculpts your rage into lessons. Teaching you how to wrangle the force and control it. How to use it to make the world bow.

These things will remain secret. For you fear Sol and the others will strip them of you. Strip them of the new master you've come to worship.

"Do you think people glow when they fall in love?" Jacki's voice is filled with sleep. Eyes closed as she murmurs remnants of movie memory. "No, I don't believe they do" you answer. "too...bad" There was a yawn there darling and vigorous like the rests of her. She looks so sweet like this, infantile in all the ways she can't be. Little girl dreaming of something impossible. You wonder if Sol's told her the fairytales too. You kiss the crown of her head, your baby sister you think. And big brother Yord, snoring with his head thrown back.

Maybe you should test her theory. rising softly from the couch you make your way to the door. Throwing one final glance at your sleeping siblings. Before going to find Qimir.

His lips ghost over yours, spilling star-clad secrets between each kiss. The apothecary has never been so dark, so secret, so secluded. Qimir's lips glided across your neck biting the flesh and licking the little diamond droplets of blood. Your nails rack across his spine, the wool of his throw-over itching the backs of your hands. "So precious" he mumbles, voice ridden with want, need. it's criminal how desperately he needs to feel you. You writhe under him, "Qimir, kiss." you whine. His lips feel like a lifeline, something keeping you sain. He pushes fireflies and lava pearls inside you, carving you open and enjoying you

He always enjoys you.

It's foggy outside when his tongue clashes against yours. A thick unsettling mist banging against the darkened window. "You're custom-made for me" Qimir mumbles against your lips. "Custome tailored" you boldly correct. "ummm, sure" his hands pinch at your hips, clawing mindlessly and leaving tails to your thighs. But the sensations are growing distant, you hear the heavy hum of saber activation. You psyche cracks

The world is dark,

He alone is absolute.

Your master's mask flashes dangerously across your mind. "Master Sol would be disappointed". You've heard that line a million times. Still, the words cut a little too deep coming from your demiurger. "Gullible" you don't understand, what have you done to earn his rage? He's gone, leaving you in the emptiness, you taste the charcoal from the landscape under your tongue.

Still, you long to call after him.

"Master"

The darkness subsides with the feeling of softness across your muscles. A breeze stirs you from the clutches of slumber. "Good morning" Qimir chirps, soft smile greeting you as you open your eyes. "Qimir, when did I?" he laughs, it's such a pretty sound this early in the morning. Sweet like caramel tea. He kisses your forehead. His quietude is commendable, he tries to calm you with feather-light kisses. You laugh pushing the covers away and still. Frozen.

What's this

The nightgown is lacy and short. It drapes expensively against your skin. Marring it with its tenderness. "Qimir, what's this!" he chuckles, "I couldn't let you sleep in those robes, they looked uncomfortable." You want to argue, to scream, and be angry. But the rage boils down slowly as you notice something dangling around your wrist. A bangle, and an anklet you notice later, black and gold entwined in patterns mirroring lighting stricks. "They're from Korriban, I had some relatives there." oh, why does that planet sound so familiar? "Thanks, but ask me next time before you go playing dress-up doll with my sleeping body" He pouts and can't help but trail a string of mouthy kisses across his neck. Qimir shuffles pulling you onto his lap. Pushing his nose under your chin. His eyes are honey-deo, adoring and scheming. "But you're mine." The possessive ness that flesh across his face is alarming. So is how tightly he grips your waist. It's only in this state of half-undressed that you begin to notice the taut muscles of his arms.

During your most recent lesson, your master gifts you a ripe juicy strawberry. He says it'll focus you, replenish your wither strength. You eat it a little too quickly, forgetting to savor the pink blush within. You believe too ferociously in everything your master says.

He can never be wrong.

You love the way your new master splatters blood across your sleeves. Be it yours or his enemies. He's started taking you out on his kills, having you watch as he hacks and mauls. His enemies must die, no one who doubts such marvels should be granted the privilege of life.

He's only ever spoken in half-riddles.

"Unfortunately legacy is a fickle thing. Tenacious, fervent, yet frail and erratic. No matter how hematological, we all read our bones differently."

The rain falls to your ragged heartbeat. Fast one minute and slow the next. You stick out your tongue desperate for a few drops. Your body is on fire, every muscle pushed to its limit. But the Force is screaming inside you, thumping dangerously between your fingers. You're ready for the next round. Saber ready and only half mesmerized as your master pulls out another blood-red saber. You charge, rage pumping deliciously through your body.

You forget to ask him where he got the berry from.

The next Jedi to die will be Kelnacca. That's why Sol is dragging all of you to the forest planet of Khofar. You think the name is utterly hilarious, the others don't understand the mirth.

Between briefings and Jacki and Yords packing quarrels. You sneak out to say goodbye to Qimir. Scribbling a half eligible not to leave for your master. But the apothecary is deserted upon your arrival, only a taped note on a half-full mortar.

'Gone to get more Strawberries.

Be back soon.'

You wonder if Khofar has strawberries.

Strawberry, Starberry, you're falling between the cracks of so many.

The Sun on Khofar is red, barely breaching the thick canopy. Maybe it's for the best. This scene is not one to remember, but how can you make yourself forget?

Death looms.

Permanent, Eternal

The fighting began in twilight.

The sky has grown two shades darker since.

He had floated in from the high reaches. You'd almost called out to him, 'master', the words die bitterly on your tongue. His saber ignites in the carnage, light growing redder after each kill. The bodies fall haphazardly stirring the quiet night.

Your saber falls onto the woodchip ground. No sound. He has followed you here. Yet it is not you, he seeks. Your master mask is haunting, in the dark the silver mouth glows bright white. Even against a massacre

the smile never relents.

He twirls the red saber with lethal accuracy, red arc severing another life. 'Take the right!' Jacki screams through the force, her eager voice bouncing inside your cranium. 'Don't' you scream but she's already attacked.

Saber sings saber.

Golden light flickers.

Forward. Backward. Lunge. Parry. Flunge.

Just like you practiced. Back in the quiet of the training room. Is it too late to return to the matted ground and wooden swords? Too late for safe comfort?

You won't take it for granted this time you swear.

Your master attacks with vicious zeal, cutting through the light. His black robes bleeding into the night. Jacki, scurries backward, trying to block with every ounce of strength. In one swift move, she spins freeing herself and assaulting his head with the metal of her weapon.

The mask clutters to the ground.

You scream.

He looks every bit the villain here. Blood drenched, water drenched. Smiling like the wolf in a child's picture book. Qimir's face stares back at you, hair matted to his forehead. He's panting, spent. You've never seen him toil. Dreaming him incapable of harm.

Yet he stands above the corpses. Wolf's teeth bared as he slices through the little girl.

It's been years since Master Sol tucked you into bed. Years since he's read you a story and listened to your baseless questions about romances.

You've finally gotten your answer. Painted in a shade of red indistinguishable from black.

Because the villain is too vile to be loved.

You run, catching the limp corpse before it joins the rest, you cradle her close. Tears landing on the orange of her face. There are no strawberry romances here. No sweet forbidden fruits. Just pain, hollow, empty, rotten. "Jacki" your voice muffles into her robes, rain-soaked, tear-soaked.

"Was that its name?" his voice doesn't sound right. No cheerful hellos or drowsy laughs. It's all menacing now, grating and hollow lilt. "Qimir" you wail, sob half caught in your throat. "It can't be you." He shakes his head, smile crooked and maniacal. "I'm afraid so, little one." The force pushed you up, pulling you to him. Qimirs head tilts, his fingers dancing around your throat. Squeezing squeezing squzing. Your glossy eyes take in his unruly appearance. Even now your master looks utterly perfect. Muscles relaxed as he steals your breath. "Master" you whine, your heart shouldn't be hammering like this, leaping through beats like something lovesick.

"(Y/n)" golden light fills the clearing. Yord runs, Prince Charming in every way you should have loved.

Qimir releases you, only to nestle your neck in the crook of his arm. "Don't worry darling. I'm almost done." He blocks the first attack.

Second, third. Yord scrambles to pull you away, missing each time. "Let her go" The urgency in his voice rattles you. He did love you.

Little sister, little princess.

Why is only starting to make sense now?

There's a crack, so loud it echoes across the woods.

"NO"

Yord's body joins the rest.

no no no

"Where were we?" Qimir is every bit the villain.

The dragon, the wolf, the tyrant king with a crown of bones.

"You lied to me, you killed them. Why, why would you do this."

"Because the Jedi say I can not exist." Sith, right those things were supposed to be evil. Hailing from Koriiban, the evil Jedi forced to flee. And here you were having so readily given yourself to the enemy.

The blood flows free in the rain. Dozens of bodies drained.

There's a river of blood. You kneel by the holy thing, dipping your cupped hands into the crimson. You drink deeply from the massacre thinking it'll taste sweet. Qimir pulls you in holding your throat as he submerges you.

Baptized in blood

The world flashes red.

It feels so free here. Floating weightless, letting everything be. The rage can not find you in these depths. Free like an adrift astromech. Free to float amongst the stars.

When you emerge again. The world has grown brighter. You see the wide-eyed bodies, even Sol is among the dead, you swear you see disappointment in his lifeless orbs. You gulp, swallowing the euphoric faint. You see your new master before you. Swimming to him carefully, following the gentle tug of the force. Prey meets predator. Qimir chuckles, the water is shallow by the banks. He sits awaiting, on his makeshift throne.

There is no sympathy here you should know better

"You took adorable" Qimir rasps. Hot breath fanning your ear. "Master Qimir" you mumble shifting as he pulls you onto his lap. He laughs this is submission, a breath away from grasping his desire. He cups your cheeks, drifting his hands to your shoulders. Pulling you closer, bodies melting into one.

His kisses still taste like strawberries. Sweet and metallic. All possession and domination. Biting lips and tongue and flesh. Spilling fresh poison with each snip of your neck. He licks the blood from your fingers with feral pleasure. Swirling his tongue around each digit and pulling it further down his hungry mouth. You swallow the darkness from his tongue, letting him snuff out the little embers of light. The stars are burning away bit by bit. He pushes you under again.

Mornings on Khofar are dark, caught in a perpetual twilight. Qimir wraps his robes around you letting the midnight sink into your bones. "The ships a bit off a walk. But we should be there before noon." You paddle after him. Fingers lashing awkwardly at his hand. He turns and offers you that tilted smile once more, mask bouncing in his free hand.

"Master qimir" you confess, it feels so light on your tongue. Like clutching dying white-dwarf-stars behind your teeth. He chuckles, snapping a berry from a nearby bush. His smile sings of triumph, victory, earned in blood. He places the fruit amongst your teeth. You, his little war prize.

"My little acolyte"

ᯓ♡ : @feedmestraycats @moonlovefairy  @wicked0clouds @phoenixes-and-wizards @peridedarling @morax-on-my-mind @magikmaik @lov4gor3 @manchuria @bucksdonkey @embersofimagination @hauntedhedgehogs @peter-laufeyson @papitas-con-sal @f0odie @boredtone @bluechissbrain @yourfilthydevil @n0t-skywalker @xsister-serpent @gabriqllas @zionysuss @i-love-my-babygirls @pagingoswin @jxp1ter @faebirdie @deezhutts565 @thesithdiaries @pagingoswin @hauntingwolf @scentedbanditlampwobbler @uwingdispatch @mask-knife-is-buggys-girl @lunarsvertigo @scintilla-morningstar @carpinchootaku

[sunnymoonxx]

❝self destructive tendencies❞ | qimir x fem!reader

pairing: qimir x fem!reader

● this is a 3rd pov, if you want to read 2nd pov, here●

summary: A week has passed since the battle on Khofar and the startling reveal of her former friend. Qimir, the man behind the mask and the murderer of her comrades took her to a remote island, far away from the Republic's surveillance, after she sustained severe injuries. She's been keeping her distance from him, trying to ignore her hidden feelings. Yet, when his thoughts merge with hers, the vow she made to herself becomes almost impossible to keep.

warnings: english is not my first language, sexual tension, lots of sexual tension, corruption, sexual themes/dreams, E Y E C O N T A C T, qimir, mentions of blood and injuries

author's note: I could not be a jedi I'd turn into aquaman if he asked me to join him

now playing, love in the sky by the weeknd

*:..。♡*ﾟ¨ﾟﾟ·*:..。♡౨ৎ 🍓｡˚🍰♡ ˚..。♡*ﾟ¨ﾟﾟ·*:..。♡ ︎

The moon hung low over the horizon, casting an eerie glow on the waves that lapped against the shores of the ghostly island. Qimir’s silhouette stood out against the backdrop of the night sky, his presence a constant reminder of the blood and carnage he left on Khofar. As she lay on the rough sand, the pain from her injuries pulsed faintly, and she could not shake the mixture of fear and thirst that his proximity stirred within her. The island was a planet unknown to her, and as much as she tried to examine the surface, its location remained elusive. She supposed it might have been somewhere in the Outer Rim or beyond. Somewhere where the Republic would have a difficult way of finding her. World away from the Republic’s watchful eyes, and here, with only Qimir for company, she felt both vulnerable and strangely contented.

She decided to relax on the beach, further away from Qimir’s constant presence that melted her thoughts. However, luck wasn't on her side; minutes after settling in, he walked past her to his favorite bathing spot, smirk on his face as he acknowledged her presence. It was late at night, her legs and arms sore from the repetitive training she put herself through. The island offered few diversions. Waiting for Qimir’s next move or for Sol to find her wasn’t her idea of a perfect day. The injuries covering her body were difficult to ignore, and she refused to let Qimir get close enough to her to heal them. She told herself she would rather bleed out than feel his touch on her skin. Deep down, though, she knew the real reason for keeping him at bay.

So, she lay there, absentmindedly playing with a rock she found, irritated by his presence but too weary to consider moving again. She had to admit her fault; she had set up camp right in front of his favorite spot. Over the past week, she had seen him bare many times. First unbothered but lately it had gotten under her skin. She had been friends with Qimir for some time before discovering his true identity behind the mask and his responsibility for her friends' murders. Their deaths pained her, but the betrayal and realization of his deception cut deeper. After many years, she thought she found herself a friend outside the temple. One that she could share her interests and secrets with, without the fear of being judged by the Jedi. She told him about her fears and likes. Her doubts in the order and her wish to help people as much as she could. About her hate and desire. The Sith emotions. Now he’s using them to lure her in and trap her on the other side.

She wasn’t the most perceptive, but his intentions were clear. He knew her feelings, her likes, and dislikes; she had shared them with him when she believed he was her friend and a supplier. Even a blind person could see his thoughts, and her strength in the Force allowed her to delve into his mind, revealing more than she wished to know.

She couldn’t tear her eyes away as he slowly shed his clothes to enter the water, a routine he seemed to relish. Despite her experiences in battles and missions, witnessing the horrible conditions and lack of hygiene, even her comrades didn’t bathe as frequently as Qimir did before her. She considered herself fortunate; at least he smelled good, even if the scent of sandalwood mixed with citrus fruit drove her mad. She smelled it when she woke up, during meals and training, and before sleep. She felt him everywhere. She wasn’t sure for how much longer she could endure it.

She studied the muscles of his back as he swam slowly, admiring them from her vantage point. He was undeniably strong, scars marring his skin a testament to the pain he had endured. She observed how his dark hair moved with his motions, how he ran his long thick fingers through it while washing it gently. His biceps tensed as he splashed water around his neck, and she noticed the way he caressed his chest, attempting to cleanse away the day’s dirt.

It was only when she accidentally crushed the rock in half that she realized the intensity of her stare. Clearing her throat, she sat up and leaned against the mossy bank behind her, feeling shame wash over her. She was convinced his own dreams had started to corrupt her.

One of the curses of being a Jedi was the ability to read minds, and Qimir was no exception. She saw his thoughts vividly, filled with bright colors that sent adrenaline coursing through her veins. She wondered if he wanted her to delve into his mind, to make her believe he desired her, or if he simply didn’t care. She feared he could read her thoughts too, despite her lifelong ability to block out others with ease.

She lied to herself, convincing herself that she was immune to his ideas, desires, and magnetic charm. But every time he looked at her, towered over her, or she smelled him in the air, her knees buckled, her stomach tightened, and she fought against the need to press her legs together. She felt sick, and his mind brushing against hers didn’t help.

She felt it every time he drew near. He visualized her hands in his mind, how they caressed his scars and shoulders. She saw his hair falling down as he towered over her, gently pushing her against the cold floor of his cave. She felt his breath against her neck, his fingers pulling her hair, his skin pressed against hers. In his dreams, she never resisted. He was corrupting her in his dreams, and she never once objected in them. She was embarrassed he got her mannerisms right.

She was so lost in their shared thoughts that she didn’t notice Qimir making his way out of the water, his eyes fixated on her with dangerous intensity. He carefully leaned down to grab a towel, amusement playing on his lips. He didn’t want to wake her from her thoughts, whatever they may have been.

As he gently dried himself with the soft cloth, not taking his eyes off her, he tried to read her mind, even if he failed millions of times before. He never had difficulty reading someone; one look at them and he could see their whole past. But with her, he had no idea what she was thinking or planning, or what images played in her head. She was strong, stronger than the ones he had met before, and he admired that. He praised her strength in the Force and her ability to protect herself from her nemesis. Like him.

But he could read body language. He noticed how she tensed around him when he walked past her. How her chest started rising faster whenever he stared her down. Her goosebumps when they brushed against each other. How she pressed her legs together when he towered over her. And how she was now crushing the rock in her hand, gazing in his direction.

“You can always join me, you know that.” He breathed out, letting the cloth fall to the ground, replacing it with his long blouse. She almost wanted to take the top from him just so she could continue her view, but when she finally recollected her thoughts, she wanted to slap herself. “It would help with your wounds when you don’t let me heal them.” He uttered, dressing himself, not breaking eye contact with her. He liked her stare. He liked how she fought with her emotions and how they reflected in her eyes. It pleased him.

“I’m okay,” she faked a smile, swallowing the ridiculous amount of saliva in her mouth. She forced herself to look somewhere other than his strong forearms or how he dragged the pants up his muscular legs. She found a cute shell, admiring it from afar.

She didn’t catch the grin on his face as her face turned pink and she clenched her fists. He was amused with her reactions, but her ripped bandage and the blood revealing itself underneath caught his full attention. His face froze, along with his movements while buttoning up his shirt. He would never touch her unless she wanted him to, but her leg was nowhere near being healed and with the lack of medical supplies on this island, she’d lose it long before she’d be able to leave the island.

“Let me help you.” It wasn’t a question, more of a subtle order. She didn’t miss it. A week ago, on Khofar, Qimir had stopped himself before fatally hurting her, but he still landed a strike on her leg that had trouble healing. She was stubborn enough to push him away when he offered his help, and now she started to slowly regret it.

“I don’t need anything from you,” she hissed at him, catching a glimpse of his unbuttoned blouse.

“You’re a powerful Jedi, and I don’t doubt you’d be still as fierce as you are now without your leg,” he murmured, making his way towards her, leaving his bag and shoes near the water. “If you want to risk it.” She watched him tilt his head as he slowly approached her. She could only see the images in his mind, his plans and ideas. But underneath it all, he didn’t mean it in a bad way. He wanted to help her. In his own way. He was her friend; he knew her weaknesses and strengths. He knew what she wanted, and he was willing to give it to her. But she couldn’t erase the lying and murder of her friends. She wanted her friend back. Maybe something else this time, but her trust in him had faded. Now it was just Qimir, confusing her thoughts and making her rethink her morals. She felt as disgusted with him as she felt with herself. But she understood him. Or at least tried to.

So, she didn’t oppose, letting him kneel in front of her, his hands carefully reaching out to her ripped bandage above her knee. He was so close she could smell him again. His hair fell into his face, covering his eyes that were focusing only on her wound. His fingers worked fast but tenderly as he lifted her thigh to unwrap the bandage. She swallowed hard, feeling his veiny hand below her leg. She was scared he could feel her burning skin, hoping he would mistake it as a result of the injury.

“I didn’t mean to hurt you on Khofar,” she heard him whisper, gripping the sand below her as he threw away the bandage, the cold air kissing her open wound. She almost heard pity in his voice. She was certain she imagined it.

She begged herself to look away, but her eyes betrayed her as they glared down at his hand that was almost as big as her thigh. He covered the wound, not touching it fully, concentrating on restoring her cells.

She was fascinated by how quickly the wound closed up, leaving only a small scar across her thigh. She had wanted to learn how to force heal ever since she lost her friend to a fatal injury as a kid, but the Jedi never taught her. No matter how hard she pleaded. Whenever she asked, they gave the same answer: only dark side users possess this power. She always felt it was ridiculous.

“How do you do it?” she managed to ask, ignoring Qimir’s confused stare as he picked up his head and drew his hand away from her. But he didn’t move position and kept kneeling between her feet. “How do you force heal?” she felt embarrassed asking, but he was one of her only chances to learn.

A soft smile crept to his lips as he moved his eyes from her face to her hands. She suddenly became aware of her vulnerable position.

“In order to heal someone,” he started, softness in his voice, no signs of mockery. “You need to focus on your own energy, imagine it and visualize it. Imagine its color, like you do with the Force.” He continued, his hands moving in motion with his words.

She could feel the warmth radiating off him as he sat centimeters away, his wet hair framing his sharp features. His eyes were dark, only the light of the moon reflecting in them. His lips were full, stretched as he shared his knowledge with her. She didn’t move a muscle and returned his stare. It was only the two of them.

“The Jedi teach only one way. Physical way. Taking your physical energy and giving it to someone who needs it,” he whispered, leaning his head to the side, giving her a view of his sharp jaw. His neck was thick, his collarbones defined. “But there is another way.” He stopped to look at her, examining her expression. She was listening intently, breathing fast, and her eyes bored so deeply into him he was certain she could read everything he was thinking. He let her.

“Below the surface of consciousness are powerful emotions. Anger. Fear. Loss.” He started listing, his eyes twitching between her eyes and her lips. “Desire.”

Her leg muscles twitched, her core burning up. She wanted to bury herself.

“Only Sith feel those emotions,” she whispered back, denying herself. She saw a smile tugging on the corner of his mouth before he lowered his gaze.

“You can draw energy from them, direct them in any way you want,” he purred, looking back at her, letting her feel his emotions. “However, whenever you want.” He lowered his voice as he stretched the last words, reading her face.

He knew she read his mind. He knew she saw the images that kept him awake and his wishes. He had had them since he met her months ago, and when he sensed her attraction toward him, they only intensified. He wanted her and was simply waiting for her to admit the same to herself, no matter how long it would take.

[amewat]

In a while I will her character file 😝😝😝 for now I do this.

She has insomnia and sol visit her every night, so she doesn’t sleep well 😔

Strawberry sol!!!🍓

[wileys-russo]

Can you tell us a little bit of headcanons for fresa and sol without you know spoiling anything!? 🥹

Fresa🍓and Solstråle ☀️ @girlgenius1111

- Fresa is a short lil pocket rocket Spaniard but Sol has those tall tall scandi genes like ingrid.

- Sol is a nature girlie forcing Fresa on hikes and long walks when Fresa is a beach girlie and just wants to go get her nails done and go out for brunch

- Sol is short tempered and hot headed but Fresa is the only person (except for scout ofc) who she can’t ever stay mad at and calms her down in a heartbeat

- Fresa's love language once shes comfortable is also physical violence like alexia. sol’s love language is words of affirmation. girlie needs to be constantly reminded that fresa does not in fact, hate her

- Sol wears a lot of colour, Fresa wears more neutrals

- Fresa is the yapper and Sol is the listener

- fresa often agrees to things she doesn’t want to do like go on long hikes because sol is so pretty fresa gets distracted and doesnt listen

- BONUS: mapi and alba are their (unwilling) personal chauffeurs because neither of them drive

[girlgenius1111]

Eventually sol and fresa will meet with the easy option so at one of the barca game or like in another way? And do they know who their sister are or not? 🤔

fresa and sol will meet…. can’t say whether its at a barça game or not though 🙃☀️🍓

i would say currently, they really only know of the other. fresa knows ingrid has a younger sister living with her, and sol knows alexia has a younger sister. their paths haven’t quite crossed yet, though.

[chaoticdreamfart]

Armağan Arslan 🎤💯🎤💯🎤💯

Muhteşem sesiyle karşınızda 🤗

Sız değerli kıymetli arkadaşlarima 😏

Armağanim olsun 🤣

Beğeniler için çok 😏

Teşekkür eder 🙃🤣😁

Delikanlı kız 😁😂....✍️

Kim işine geldiği gibi tanımak

İstiyorsa ben buyum gardaş

Sağ yanım asalet sol yanım

Cesaret delikanlı kız der

Yüreği olan hamle yapsın👌✌️...✍️

Nasıl davrandıkları için özür dilemek

Yerine tepki gosterdiğin için özür

Dilemeni bekleyen insanlar var

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Yerden kopmasını beklemem

Tutar düğüm attiğim yerden

Keserim bu da böyle biline

Delikanlı kız der gevşeklere..😁...✍️

Delikanlı kız 😁

Hem deli hem prenses 🌿♥️🌿

🍂👑🍓

[satorisoup]

° . 🍽️ — TASTE TESTERS .ᐟ

@lowkeyremi maya ! 🍓⊹ ˚˖ . ° . * : ･

@luvring nia !

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° . 💌 — message from the baker !

(つω`｡) — “ my taste testers are all wonderful ! i hold them very dear to my heart <3 thank you for supporting my bakery with your love !! ” 🍓

[xolilith]

🍓Morango [00:55] - Na Jaemin

O cristal gelado e docinho do sorvete de morango dissolve sobre sua língua. O gosto e cheiro da fruta tomam seus sentidos e fazem um suspiro escapar em meio aos barulhos de explosão da televisão. E daí que eram quase três da manhã? O calor infernal do país tropical parecia ainda pior do que ano passado, nem parecia que era noite. Se não tivesse olhado pela janela algum tempo antes, formaria a hipótese da lua ter sido substituída pelo sol. Observa Luke ressonar sobre seu colo, todo esparramado, ronrona vez ou outra. Lucy também permanece na mesmo situação, próxima de uma das almofadas ao seu lado. E Luna, bem, Luna estava sobre a mesinha de centro, o olhar preguiçoso e fixo sobre você, como se atentamente a viagiasse. Diferente dos irmãos, Luna era mais arisca e desconfiada e parecia não gostar muito de você, principalmente quando estava junto de Jaemin. Toma mais uma colherada do sorvete, prestando atenção mais uma vez em The Umbrella Academy, na sina de Five - um idoso na pele de um adolescente passando pela latente puberdade e apaixonado por um manequim - em salvar os irmãos mais uma vez do iminente apocalipse em 1963. Se perde um tempo nas cenas, até escutar os ruídos de passos vindo do quarto principal, até poderia ficar com medo de ser um fantasma, mas logo a presença de Na Jaemin retem o anseio. Assim como os outros gatos, Jaemin arruma uma espacinho ao seu lado para se aninhar. Enfia o rosto sobre o seu pescoço, a voz baixa e rouca indaga baixinho. – Não é muito tarde para sorvete? – Muito calor, Nana! Jaemin ronrona sobre seu pescoço em concordância. Tinha também acordado com uma fina camada de suor sobre a pele antes de vir procurá-la quando notou a ausência na cama. Entreabe um pouco os olhos para ver o que você assiste. – Você não cansa de assistir toda vez essa mesma temporada? Nega, rindo baixinho pelo tom cansado que ele usa. – Não. Você sabe que eu sou meio apaixonada pelo Ray. Jaemin sopra uma risadinha. – Allison deveria ter cuidado com você. – Você assente e ele continua. – Você não parece a única apaixonada por aqui. – Jaemin constata ao olhar Luke esparramado em seu colo. O gato parecendo zombar por ter mais espaço sobre você do que ele. – Luke é mesmo um conquistadorzinho barato. Diz entredentes, estreitando os olhos falsamente ameaçador na direção do bichano. Você ri, toma mais um pouco do sorvete. – Você não deveria reclamar do Luke, ele é inofensivo. – Garante. – Você deveria mesmo se preocupar com a Luna, ela parece prestes a fincar as unhas na minha garganta, Nana. Além do mais, você sabe que boa parte do meu coração é ocupado por um outro gato aí. Termina, como quem não quer nada. Fazendo um charminho na voz. – Ah é?! Jaemin alarga um sorrisinho, larga um beijinho sobre a pele do seu pescoço que te faz rir, bobinha. – Sério, Jaemin! Inclina-se um pouco para pousar a taça sobre a mesinha de centro, tomando cuidado para não ficar muito próxima de Luna. Luke pula de seu colo, espreguiça-se pronto para também seguir para o quarto quando você diz. – Vem. Vamos voltar a dormir, Nana.

[kerjaath]

Singin' In The Shower

you thought the house was empty.

OR, you were taking a shower and started to get a little loud, unaware Yumi was still home.

reader lives in tgc house

no reader gender specified

word count: 1.1K

AN: hello everyoneeeee!!!!!!!!!!! first actual full fic posted on tumblr :333 if u wanna see more i gotchu!!! my fanfic suggestions r open and ready :3

AO3 LINK

⋆｡‧˚ʚ🍓ɞ˚‧｡⋆

⋆｡‧˚ʚ🍓ɞ˚‧｡⋆

the house is always loud. whether it be breakfast time and everyone is huddled in the living room, stuffing their faces as they laugh at whatever is possibly playing on the t.v., or if it's the middle of the night and everyone is still streaming together.

quiet moments are rare, but the volume of the house never really bothered you too much.

It was your average, slow Thursday. Nothing was really going on all day, but when you left the shrouded comfort of your room to scavenge for a snack, you weren't too surprised to find the cabinets completely empty. Well, besides a stack of gamersupps and two empty granola bar boxes (damn you, Tanner, for taking the last ones without throwing out the boxes..)

You were in luck to find something in the fridge, though, and it wasn't long before you finished eating and headed back towards your bedroom.

unfortunately, before you could even slink into your room Isaac shouted towards you,

"Hey, we're all gonna go hit up Raising Cane's for dinner, you wanna come?" He held his hand on a corner of the wall, leaning towards you. Your cheeks slightly flustered up,

"Oh, I just ate, you guys can go without me," you laughed lightly to yourself. The chances of you eating right before everyone suddenly wanted to go out to eat - just your luck.

" 'Kay, well we're all gonna head out in a few minutes." Isaac already headed for the front door, where you assumed everyone else was waiting. You made a small hum, turning back to your bedroom door.

But, for a moment, you stopped.

Everyone else going out for dinner… you staying home, alone… home. Alone.

You smiled to yourself. You could do and be as silly as you wanted while everyone was gone without the fear of someone being nearby! Like… singing in the shower.

You already needed a shower anyway, your hair wasn't particularly in its best state, so why waste this chance to sing your heart out?

You turned on your heel, heading for the bathroom and setting a towel out. You waited for a moment, though. You couldn't just jump in the shower and sing your heart out…

You briskly walked back to the kitchen, turning to the front door. No one stood there… you quickly skipped your way to the window next to the door, moving a blind over to check to front yard. No one in sight.

You backed up, listening to the house… silence.

You shuffled to everyone's bedrooms, listening at the door before peeking in to check for anyone. But your search came back fruitless. You smiled, letting out a cackle, as you rushed to the bathroom.

Ushering the door closed, you started the water as you opened your phone, opening Spotify to find a fitting playlist 2000's girly hits… your 2023 Spotify wrapped… maybe even a playlist you couldn't stop listening to 24/7???

you paused for a moment. Yumi's album sat in your reccommended artist's playlist panels. You cracked a smile, clicking the playlist as you grabbed your speaker on the bathroom sink, hooking your Bluetooth up.

You never really sat and truly listened to Yumi's music on your own. There were the few moments you did, but it was never really a common everyday sort of thing. It was rarely even a monthly thing. But you liked his music. A part of you really only liked it so much because you could endulge in your guilty pleasure - just sitting and listening to Yumi's voice.

When you climbed in the shower, you just couldn't hold back your voice. Screaming along with Yumi, it felt almost… requited. As if he was really with you.

You barely even washed your hair, too busy flailing your hands around, dancing as the music got louder and louder.

...

When your solo concert finished up, your skin soggy and wrinkly, you climbed out of the shower and wrapped a towel around your chest. It draped down your stomach and past your waist, stopping around your mid-thigh. As you left the bathroom, you hummed a section of a song you didn't finish before you got out.

You were walking peacefully back to your room, but you froze in fear as you heard a light chuckle from behind you.

as you turned around, it was none other than the man himself - Yumi - standing in the hallway, cupping his mouth, his face flushing as he tried to hold in laughter.

"I thought you guys went out to eat.." you stumbled on your own words, your face flashing pale before beating a bright red. You realized your state of clothing, or really the lack of such, and made a minor yelp noise as you pulled your towel to cover yourself. It didn't really cover you any further, but what else were you to do in the moment?

"Yeah, they went out," Yumi stiffled another laugh, "but I decied to stayed home."

"And you didn't bother to tell me??" You practically muttered your words, mentally reliving the previous 45 minutes or so in the shower.

"You know, I didn't know you liked my music that much…" he grinned.

"Oh, don't get cocky.." you turned around to not face him, shaking the red off your face before you looked back at him.

"You cannot tell anyone about this." you tried to give him a serious look. He just laughed at you further.

"Stooop, I mean it!!" You shouted at him, annoyed. You felt as if you were back in elementary school, the older cool boys teasing you...

"And why should I do that?" It was as if he couldn't smile any bigger.

"Because.." you thought for a moment, glancing at the ground in thought before looking back up, "I'll strike you a deal."

"and that is…" he turned his head slightly, an eyebrow rising. It was obvious you had intrigued and caught him in your trap...

"If you keep this a secret…" you inched closer to him, leaving a small space in-between you two. His face grew a shade of pink, and you noticed how he glanced at your towel. "I'll give you a treat."

he thought for a moment, curious as to what this "treat" was.. he slowly, ever so slightly, nodded his head, but before he could even get a word in, you jumped to action.

You quickly threw your arms up and around his head, tugging his face down to your level, and kissed him.

Before he could even react, you turned on your heel and increased your pace to get back to your room, an uncontrollable smile taking over your burning face.

⋆｡‧˚ʚ🍓ɞ˚‧｡⋆

⋆｡‧˚ʚ🍓ɞ˚‧｡⋆

[yandere-wishes]

Qimir x jedi reader tasked with watching him? Bonus for sith / force user mastermind Qimir trying to turn the reader 👀

⋆｡‧˚ʚ🍓ɞ˚‧｡⋆

I don't know why but something about Qimir makes me think of strawberries.

⋆｡‧˚ʚ🍓ɞ˚‧｡⋆

You part your lips, slowly, sanguinely letting him push the ripe red fruit between your teeth. Qimir smiles eyes a little too bright in the half-rundown apothecary. You find that the golden flicker in his gaze reminds you of strawberry achenes shining under twin suns.

Odd how he's just like the old-world fruit.

"You know" Qimir's voice holds its regular loosened melody. A lyric lilt between each syllable. "these strawberries are really similar to the force. betcha didn't know the yellow freckles are the real fruit and the red part is just the housing."

You bite, severing the red thing in half. It's sweet and juicy yet oddly firm. You wonder if this is what Qimir's lips taste like. Maybe he'll let you have a bite. "It's kinda like us-..you, you force force users. All individual specks floating around the galaxy. Held together by the force."

The little not-seeds rasp against your throat as you swallow. You want so badly to feel his lips, suck the minimal force radiating off of him devouring it whole and letting his glaring darkness fester inside your stomach.

Maybe red and gold are better than the blue and green you've always known. Maybe the fickle words of a fickle man hold some mirth, worth engraving in your heart.

You watch tentatively as Qimir's teeth sink into the other half. He smiles through the bite and swallow. Oh, how you wish you were that particular strawberry sitting pretty between his lips.

You're a Jedi.

Some immovable force.

So why do you quiver and fawn for such a corrupted man?

He's closer now, snuffing the air from your lungs. You're on the edge of his hooded gaze, frozen as his berry-blemished lips come closer. "A Jedi shouldn't want this.." His lips taste like ancient starfruit, burning with flavors too strong to tame. His tongue parts your teeth slipping inside and feeding off your little moans.

"These pleasures are only for those who embrace the dark.." He finally says, the kiss now a distant memory. You close your eyes, trying to regain a fraction of your breath before bolting through the door.

On the way back to the Jedi temple, you palm the inside of your pocket. Feeling the soft pricks of strawberry. Your heart skips a rotting beat.

Master Sol = pears

Yord = Mango

Darth Teeth = coconut

[sunnymoonxx]

He knew she was a different Jedi, she was better than him, he couldn't read her mind , or could even tell what she thinks, but she could feel everything he felt . She understood him. Lot sexual tension

❝self destructive tendencies❞ | qimir x fem!reader

pairing: qimir x fem!reader

● this is a 2nd pov, if you want to read 3rd pov, here●

summary: A week has passed since the battle on Khofar and the startling reveal of your former friend. Qimir, the man behind the mask and the murderer of your comrades took you to a remote island, far away from the Republic's surveillance, after you sustained severe injuries. You've been keeping your distance from him, trying to ignore your hidden feelings. Yet, when his thoughts merge with yours, the vow you made to yourself becomes almost impossible to keep.

warnings: english is not my first language, sexual tension, corruption, sexual themes/dreams, E Y E C O N T A C T, qimir, mentions of blood and injuries

author's note: I could not be a jedi I'd turn into aquaman if he asked me to join him

now playing, love in the sky by the weeknd

*:..。♡*ﾟ¨ﾟﾟ·*:..。♡౨ৎ 🍓｡˚🍰♡ ˚..。♡*ﾟ¨ﾟﾟ·*:..。♡ ︎

The moon hung low over the horizon, casting an eerie glow on the waves that lapped against the shores of the ghostly island. Qimir’s silhouette stood out against the backdrop of the night sky, his presence a constant reminder of the blood and carnage he left on Khofar. As you laid on the rough sand, the pain from your injuries pulsed faintly, you could not shake the mixture of fear and thirst that his proximity stirred within you. The island was a planet unknown to you and as much as you tried to examine the surface, its location remained elusive to you. You supposed it might have been somewhere in the Outer Rim or beyond. Somewhere where the Republic would have a difficult way of finding you. World away from the Republic’s watchful eyes, and here, with only Qimir for company, you felt both vulnerable and strangely contented.

You decided to relax on the beach, further away from Qimir’s constant presence that melted your thoughts. However, luck wasn't on your side; minutes after settling in, he walked past you to his favorite bathing spot, smirk on his face as he acknowledged your presence. It was late at night, your legs and arms sore from the repetitive training, you put yourself through. The island offered few diversions. Waiting for Qimir’s next move or for Sol to find you wasn’t your idea of a perfect day. The injuries covering your body were difficult to ignore, and you refused to let Qimir get close enough to you to heal them. You told yourself you would rather bleed out than feel his touch on your skin. Deep down, though, you knew the real reason for keeping him at bay.

So, you lay there, absentmindedly playing with a rock you found, irritated by his presence but too weary to consider moving again. You had to admit your fault; you had set up camp right in front of his favorite spot. Over the past week, you had seen him bare many times. First unbothered but lately it has gotten under your skin. You had been friends with Qimir for some time before discovering his true identity behind the mask and his responsibility for your friends' murders. Their deaths pained you, but the betrayal and realization of his deception cut deeper. After many years you thought you found yourself a friend outside the temple. One that you could share your interests and secrets with, without the fear of being judged by the Jedi. You told him about your fears and likes. Your doubts in the order and your wish to help people as much as you could. About your hate and desire. The Sith emotions. Now he’s using them to lure you in and trap you on the other side.

You weren’t the most perceptive, but his intentions were clear. He knew your feelings, your likes, and dislikes; you had shared them with him when you believed he was your friend and a supplier. Even a blind person could see his thoughts, and your strength in the Force allowed you to delve into his mind, revealing more than you wished to know.

You couldn’t tear your eyes away as he slowly shed his clothes to enter the water, a routine he seemed to relish. Despite your experiences in battles and missions, witnessing the horrible conditions and lack of hygiene, even your comrades didn’t bathe as frequently as Qimir did before you. You considered yourself fortunate; at least he smelled good, even if the scent of sandalwood mixed with citrus fruit drove you mad. You smelled it when you woke up, during meals and training, and before sleep. You felt him everywhere. You weren’t sure for how much longer you could endure it.

You studied the muscles of his back as he swam slowly, admiring them from your vantage point. He was undeniably strong, scars marring his skin a testament to the pain he had endured. You observed how his dark hair moved with his motions, how he ran his long thick fingers through it while washing it gently. His biceps tensed as he splashed water around his neck, and you noticed the way he caressed his chest, attempting to cleanse away the day’s dirt.

It was only when you accidently crushed the rock in half, you realized the intensity of your stare. Clearing your throat, you sat up and leaned against the mossy bank behind you, feeling shame wash over you. You were convinced his own dreams started to corrupt you.

One of the curses of being a Jedi was the ability to read minds, and Qimir was no exception. You saw his thoughts vividly, filled with bright colors that sent adrenaline coursing through your veins. You wondered if he wanted you to delve into his mind, to make you believe he desired you, or if he simply didn’t care. You feared he could read your thoughts too, despite your lifelong ability to block out others with ease.

You lied to yourself, convincing yourself that you were immune to his ideas, desires, and magnetic charm. But every time he looked at you, towered over you, or you smelt him in the air, your knees buckled, your stomach tightened, and you fought against the need of pressing your legs together. You felt sick and his mind brushing against yours didn’t help.

You felt it every time he drew near. He visualized your hands in his mind, how they caressed his scars and shoulders. You saw his hair falling down as he towered over you, gently pushing you against the cold floor of his cave. You felt his breath against your neck, his fingers pulling your hair, his skin pressed against yours. In his dreams, you never resisted. He was corrupting you in his dreams, and you never once objected in them. You were embarrassed he got your mannerisms right

You were so lost in your shared thoughts, you didn’t notice Qimir making his way out of the water, his eyes fixated on you with dangerous intensity. He carefully leaned down to grab a towel, amusement playing on his lips. He didn’t want to wake you up from your thoughts, whatever they may have been.

As he gently dried himself with soft cloth, not taking his eyes of you, he tried to read your mind, even if he failed millions of times before. He never had difficulty reading someone, one look at them and he could see their whole past. But you, he had no idea what you were thinking or planning, or what images played in your head. You were strong, stronger that the ones he met before, and he admired that. He praised your strength in the force and your ability to protect yourself from your nemesis. Like him.

But he could read body language. He noticed how you tensed around him when he walked past you. How your chest started rising faster whenever he stared you down. Your goosebumps when you brushed against each other. How you pressed your legs together when he towered over you. And how you were now crushing the rock in your hand, gazing his direction.

“You can always join me, you know that.” He breathed out, letting the cloth fall on the ground, replacing it with his long blouse. You almost wanted to take the top from him just so you could continue your view but when you finally recollected your thoughts, you wanted to slap yourself. “It would help with your wounds when you don’t let me heal them.” He uttered, dressing himself, not breaking eye contact with you. He liked your stare. He liked how you fought with your emotions and how they reflected in your eyes. It pleased him.

“I’m okay,” you faked a smile, swallowing the ridiculous amount of saliva in your mouth. You forced yourself to look somewhere else then his strong forearms or how he dragged the pants up his muscular legs. You found a cute shell, admiring it from afar.

You didn’t catch the grin on his face as your face turned pink and you clenched your fists. He was amused with your reactions but your ripped bandage and the blood revealing itself underneath caught his full attention. His face froze, along with his movements while buttoning up his shirt. He would never touch you unless you wanted him to, but your leg was nowhere near in being healed and with the lack of medical supplies on this island, you’d lose it long before you’d be able to leave the island.

“Let me help you.” It wasn’t a question, more of a subtle order. You didn’t miss it. A week ago, on Khofar, Qimir stopped himself before fatally hurting you, but he still landed a strike on your leg, that had trouble healing. You were stubborn enough to push him away when he offered his help and now you started to slowly regret it.

“I don’t need anything from you.” You hissed at him, catching a glimpse of his unbuttoned blouse.

“You’re a powerful Jedi and I don’t doubt you’d be still as fierce as you are now without your leg.” He murmured, making his way towards you, leaving his bag and shoes near the water. “If you want to risk it.” You watched him tilt his head, as he slowly approached you. You could only see the images in his mind, his plans and ideas. But underneath it all, he didn’t mean it in a bad way. He wanted to help you. In his own way. He was your friend; he knew your weaknesses and strengths. He knew what you wanted, and he was willing to give it to you. But you couldn’t erase the lying and murder of your friends. You wanted your friend back. Maybe something else this time but your trust in him faded. Now it was just Qimir. Confusing your thoughts and making you rethink your morals. You felt as disgusted with him as you felt with yourself. But you understood him. Or at least tried to.

So, you didn’t oppose, letting him kneel in front of you, his hands carefully reaching out to your ripped bandage above your knee. He was so close you could smell him again. His hair fell into his face, covering his eyes that were focusing only on your wound. His fingers worked fast but tender as he lifted your thigh to unwrap the bandage. You swallowed hard, feeling his veiny hand below your leg. You were scared he could feel your burning skin, hoping he would mistake it as a result from the injury.

“I didn’t mean to hurt you on Khofar.” You heard him whisper, gripping the sand below you as he threw away the bandage, the cold air kissing your open wound. You almost heard pity in his voice. You were certain you imagined it.

You begged yourself to look away, but your eyes betrayed you as they glared down at his hand that was almost as big as your thigh. He covered the wound, not touching it fully, concentrating on restoring back your cells.

You were fascinated by how quickly the wound closed up, leaving only a small scar across your thigh. You wanted to learn how to force heal ever since you lost your friend to a fatal injury as a kid, but the Jedi never taught you. No matter how hard you pleaded. Whenever you asked, they answered with the same answer. Only dark side users possess this power. You always felt it was ridiculous.

“How do you do it?” you manage to ask, ignoring Qimir’s confused stare as he picked up his head and drew his hand away from you. But he didn’t move position and kept kneeling between your feet. “How do you, force heal?” you felt embarrassed asking but he was one of your only chances on how to learn.

A soft smile creeped to his lips as he moved his eyes from your face to your hands. You suddenly became aware of your vulnerable position.

“In order to heal someone,” he started, softness in his voice, no signs of mockery. “You need to focus on your own energy, imagine it and visualize it. Imagine its color, like you do with the Force.” He continued, his hands moving in motion with his words.

You could feel the warmth radiating of of him as he sat centimeters away from you, his wet hair framing his sharp features. His eyes were dark, only the light of the moon reflecting in them. His lips were full, stretched as he shared his knowledge with you. You didn’t move a muscle and returned his stare. It was only you two.

“The Jedi teach only one way. Physical way. Taking your physical energy and give it to someone who needs it.” He whispered, leaning his head to the side, giving you a chance to admire his sharp jaw. His neck was thick, his collarbones defined. “But there is another way.” He stopped to look at you, examining your expression. You were listening sharply, breathing fast, and your eyes bore so deep in him that he was certain you could read everything he was thinking. He let you.

“Below the surface of consciousness are powerful emotions. Anger. Fear. Loss.” He started listing, his eyes twitching between your eyes and your lips. “Desire”

Your leg muscles twitched, your core burning up. You wanted to bury yourself.

“Only Sith feels those emotions.” You whispered back, denying yourself. You saw a smile tugging on the corner of his mouth before he lowered his stare.

“You can draw energy from them, direct them in any way you want.” He purred, looking back at you, letting you feel his emotions. “However, whenever you want.” He lowered his voice as he stretched the last words, reading your face.

He knew you read his mind. He knew you saw the images that kept him awake and his wishes. He had them since he met you months ago, and when he sensed your attraction toward him, they only intensified. He wanted you and was simply waiting for you to admit the same to yourself, no matter how long it would take.

[sunshyni]

Docinho azedo

Sinopse: qualquer um podia ver que Mark e Mia nasceram um para o outro. Eles estudaram na mesma universidade, exerciam a mesma profissão e até trabalhavam juntos, no mesmíssimo andar, e o melhor de tudo – que rufem os tambores! – estavam noivos há pouco mais de um mês! A situação muda quando os pombinhos são forçados a competirem entre si num duelo para além de desafiador. O que os faz ponderar: “Em quanto tempo aproximadamente aquele docinho guardado no fundo da geladeira pode azedar?” P.S. Não estamos falando de geladeiras. Gênero: fluffy shortfic. Contagem de palavras: 1.078. Notas: e não é que debutei por aqui? KKKKKK Tô com vergonha de postar isso aqui diante de tanto escritor talentoso no Tumblr 👉👈 Mas bora lá! Originalmente, essa fic era para ser postada somente no spirit (se quiser dar uma olhadinha nela por lá é só acessar o link😉), no entanto resolvi tentar a sorte nesse querido aplicativo, boa leitura e espero que vocês gostem! OBS: me inspirei nos posts de alguns perfis maravilhosos que acompanho, como a @mealcandy e a @ncdreaming🍓 Bônus: playlist da fic 🍪

Prólogo – Macio feito pêssego 🍑

Mia Berry e Mark Lee eram um casal atípico, enquanto pombinhos desapaixonados ao redor do mundo todo consentiam em apenas uma coisa: papeis de divórcio, o double M, como os amigos mais próximos estavam habituados a se referirem ao casal, dificilmente discordava. Isso não quer dizer, em hipótese alguma, que eles tinham se acostumado, eles, sem a menor sombra de dúvida, se amavam e sentiam prazer em comprovar o sentimento sempre que possível, igual Mark fazia naquele instante.

O Lee desferia beijos na face quente de Berry, “desferia” pois os selares eram violentamente carinhosos, fazendo com que Mia vergasse o tronco para trás, mas não a ponto de cair, já que um braço de Mark a amparou no primeiro sinal dessa possibilidade ser efetuada. Mia puxou o tecido da camiseta branca que o noivo vestia, separando a peça do abdome, ambos molhados devido ao mergulho que eles fizeram no riacho próximo da casa da avó de Mia.

— Pervertida — Ele provocou, os rostos perto o bastante para completar um beijo arrastado, daqueles de telenovela, no entanto Mark tombou a cabeça para trás inesperadamente, contemplando o céu ausente de nuvens, azul feito a cor dos pequenos carros que adornavam uma das camisas sociais preferidas do maior — Me prometa que vamos morar no interior quando envelhecermos.

“Ah então ele vai jogar assim” Mia pensou, sorrindo contra o pescoço do noivo que ofereceu o mindinho da mão direita para selarem a promessa, eles entrelaçaram os dedos mínimos, unindo os polegares em seguida como num carimbo, Mark plantou um beijinho nas mãos ligadas uma na outra, insatisfeito com a validação dupla.

— Já conseguimos convencer minha vó de que dormimos juntos — O rosto dele se iluminou com um sorriso capaz de ofuscar o Sol — O primeiro item da lista já foi riscado, então... Acho que é algo plausível.

— E o restante dos itens da lista? — O Lee inquiriu como quem não quer nada ao mesmo tempo em que retirava de uma sacola, um pêssego rosinha e fresco, um presente do representante da associação dos jovens garotos. Vantagens de ter crescido numa província? Não havia nenhum residente da cidadezinha que Mia não conhecesse, portanto sempre que regressava para sua terra natal, ela era recebida com uma série de presentes como os pêssegos ou até mesmo licores que a faziam choramingar.

— Acho que eu já consigo fazer grandes coisas dormindo com você.

Mark cobriu o peitoral com as mãos, a boca ligeiramente aberta, olhos direcionados para a futura esposa que não fazia a mínima ideia do motivo daquela observação intensa, por esse motivo, durante um bom intervalo de tempo eles permaneceram imóveis, havendo somente o som das águas do rio e o canto incessante dos pássaros entre eles.

— Larga de ser atirada — Com a mão em concha, Mark alcançou a água doce e cristalina que batia nos seus tornozelos (por estarem sentados sobre uma pedra), jogando água em uma Mia espantada com a cabecinha perversa que seu cônjuge poderia ter, ela nem se importou com os pingos de água que acertaram seu pêssego acidentalmente.

— Eu não estava falando com malícia! — Protestou em meio a uma risada contagiante que fez os olhos castanhos de Mark se enrugarem nos cantos. As frutas mordidas voltaram para a sacola, o Lee segurou as mãos um tanto trêmulas de sua noiva, talvez fosse pelas pupilas dilatadas perceptíveis pelos raios solares ou pelo conjunto Mark Lee, paisagem e Sol, existia algo de muito encantador nas bochechas aquecidas e rosadas que recebiam as palmas de Mia com ternura.

— Aham, tô sabendo — Incitou, conduzindo-a para dentro das águas vagarosamente, cada passo para trás acompanhado por sorrisos bobos do moreno.

— Gelado — Ela sussurrou, envolvendo os braços ao redor do pescoço do noivo ao passo que Mark capturava seus lábios naquele beijo suspenso minutos antes, os lábios macios se movendo sobre os dela com volúpia e delonga, hesitante em encerrar o toque suave.

— Docinho — O Lee tinha razão. Não existia melhor palavra que retratasse o amor deles. Mark e Mia viviam um amor docinho de fruta.

[...]

— Deveríamos estar dormindo — Murmurou Mark, se ajeitando sobre as roupas de cama do antigo quarto de Mia — Vamos acordar a sua vó.

— Relaxa — Replicou Mia no mesmo volume de voz, compenetrada — É só não fazer muito barulho.

Havia uma superstição na qual Mia ouvia desde criança que dizia que se você pintasse as unhas do seu amado com bálsamo e a cor persistisse até a primeira nevasca, o casal estava fadado a viver o resto dos seus dias juntos, portanto Mark estava sentado de pernas cruzadas à frente do seu primeiro amor, que espalhava a pastinha rubra no dedo mínimo do garoto com um cotonete.

— Não vai durar até a primeira nevasca — A respiração dele tocou a pele dela quando Berry elevou o olhar.

— Eu sei — Sorriu, finalizando seu trabalho ao cobrir o mindinho de Mark com papel filme transparente a fim da coloração agir mais depressa — Mas e daí? Eu não preciso de muita comprovação pra saber que eu vou me casar com você, eu já tenho isso.

Sacudiu os dedos da mão esquerda, como costumava fazer ao exibir o anel de noivado para colegas, em que uma pedrinha rosa em formato de coração tremeluzia no seu centro. Mark esboçou um sorriso, curvando o corpo de Mia perigosamente até que suas costas encontrassem o colchão, o olhar brincalhão jamais se esvaindo da sua expressão.

— O que foi mesmo que você disse? — Ele questionou, envolto numa falsa deliberação — Ah, é só não fazer barulho, né?

Mia soltou um risinho baixo enquanto Mark em cima de si plantava um beijo na ponta do nariz alheio. Os dois só conseguiram sair daquela névoa de paixão quando o celular de Mia trepidou, sobressaltando-os, ela tateou cegamente em busca do aparelho e quando finalmente o encontrou, seu namorado não ousou mover um músculo, dizendo sem a necessidade de palavras que estava afim de fuxicar o e-mail recente.

— Engraçadinha — Foi a reação do Lee com a imagem de plano de fundo, dele dormindo serenamente ainda vestindo uma de suas gravatas peculiares.

Ambos estranharam o fato da mensagem ter sido encaminhada para apenas o casal.

“Caro senhor Lee e Cara senhorita Berry,

Por favor, preciso que compareçam até o meu escritório amanhã, sem falta.

Cordialmente, Johnny Suh.”

Por que raios o filho do presidente estava enviando um e-mail num domingo à noite? Eles não tinham ideia. Tinham certeza de uma coisa entretanto, a de que eles estavam encrencados aparentemente.

— Merda — Deixaram escapar em uníssono.

(Créditos para a @ch9xhleye por essa artezinha de pêssego tão fofinha❤️)

Não sei quando vou atualizar, mas é isso! KKKKKK

Beijinhos açucarados! 🍬🍬🍬