#sorry i really like rivals LMFAO

[quirinah]

post that totally isn’t vagueing my really specific taste in character dynamics dot jpeg

[riririnnnn]

ngl as much as i like isagi it gets boring when he's winning too much 🤷‍♀️ i still hope he wins tho lol but he needs to lose sometimes idk wtv i love kaiser

Hm, I agree with you, but at the same time, I don't too—Isagi isn't winning 'too much', he is, simply, reaping what he sowed.

So, let's start from the start:

Isagi's initial ranking was 299 which is HELLA low, but, you know, that ranking was, somewhat, pretty.. false.

In short, there were 5 strata and EVERY team in each stratum was named from V to Z and EVERYONE, initially, held a ranking from 241 to 300, so we have no way to truly calculate Isagi's true ranking out of 300.

One more reason why I don't trust that ranking is because Ego is one hell of a cunning man—I bet there were more than just 'skills' as a criteria to rank them because I can never in my whole life accept that Niko ranked above Kunigami.

And in the first selection he LOST to Barou—he did NOT win right away. He did NOT score ALL the goals in their subsequent winning matches too—Bachira, Chigiri, Gagamaru, Kunigami, even Kuon shined in their own times. Isagi did NOT have the spotlight onto him all at once.

Skipping towards Second Selection, we remember him getting praised by Anri that, "Ooh, that kid is improving so fast," and it was, by no means, a protagonist point because, my brother in Christ, one of his abilities is literally adapting!

And after we get his new ranking of 15, and as said by Ego, it's a true ranking rather than a false one like earlier.

Then the story proceeds and he challenges Rin, and guess what?

HE LOSES TWICE AGAINST RIN!!

And then.

HE LOST AGAINST THE WORLD FIVE TOO!

HE IS THE LITERAL PROTAGONIST AND HE HAS BEEN SHOWN LOSING SO MANY TIMES ALREADY!!!!!!!

If he really had an actual plot armour, then he would've won against Rin the second time and would've gotten VERY close to winning against the World Five too.

You getting me?

And then he doesn't even have a ranking in the Top 6!?! His ahh wasn't even the runner-up of it—Bachira was!

And trust me when I say it, if it would've been any animanga other than Blue Lock, then that protagonist would've been the CF during the U-20 because WE ALL KNOW HOW IMPORTANT THAT MATCH WAS SINCE BLUE LOCK'S LIFE LITERALLY WAS DEPENDENT ON IT!!!!!

I'm so sorry. I promise I'm not angry or yelling at you. Please don't be mad at me, I'm just being passionate.

Now comes the current arc: NEL

I've already made a post about why Kaiser chose Isagi to be his rival (it may differ once we get Kaiser's backstory revealed), so keeping it aside, I want to say that Isagi is THE pacifist because if Kaiser did all that to ME, then I would've swung so fast like who tf you calling a clown, huh? You wanna catch these hands? Guess what, I'll give you these legs too.

Well, now focusing on FC Barcha match, remember that Isagi didn't score. He PASSED. How can people even forget that? Yukimiya nearly threw hands because of that only!

And then came Manshine City—bro, he literally got blocked by Kaiser and then he PASSED again and then he FAINTED!?!?!?!?!

All this time he was SLOWLY building up momentum and that's what we low-key saw in Ubers match and are seeing in PXG match.

He EARNED everything.

He wasn't winning everytime.

He has lost many times too.

We just have too many characters who are given proper amount of character developments which sometimes reduces Isagi to being just a protagonist—God! Us Fandom is so spoiled, aren't we? We are so well fed that we have become bratty, LMFAO.

And yes, I love Kaiser a lot too.

But in the end, the Roman Empire fell too, right?

[himeryu]

— Love Rivalry: 33. bromance (lets make out platonically)

kaveh x reader

main m.list | series m.list | previous | next

the longest chapter ever LMFAO

i really wanted to emphasize kaveh's feelings and relationship with his friends before this smau ends (which is like very soon surprisingly)

ALSO this chapter had the opportunity to insert dehya in the boyz gc but when i realized it was too late and i did not want to rewrite everything

anyways i am no longer heartbroken and so no more angst # movedon

LASTLY after this smau ill probably start with mishap bUT i thought of an amazing plot for a diff smau so now i dont know which one i should start, ill probably start the one i feel most passionate about...

im sorry for mishap waiters it is currently losing 💔

SYNOPSIS You’ve been rejected by your academic rival, alhaitham, without even confessing or having feelings for him. You decided to go to a party to fix your damaged ego, so why are you suddenly making out with his roommate?

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@dee-zbignuts @lxry-chxn @ducq @nikkicola @artssleepy @arraxthatsonjah @kunihaver @i-x4o @soohasoya @yae-raidenmyloves @aixaingela @09yyeol @nebulaera @bokutetsumu @kairxse @victoria1676 @thenightsflower @ti-lsy @alizaneth @abvolat @carnnieval @ultimate-imagines @ventisoba @skimm0nzz @slvdsjjk @succutie @empathum @saoiirsee @disa-ster @httpmitsuya @kunikuzushiit @semi-orangeapple @goodthingimsam @strawberry1894 @meep13r @leeyanyanyaaan @heart-cream @crueldinasty @justonemoreroz @boordbokee @moraxsimp69 @kkiryu @r4yyyyy @tartagli-yuh @raideneiari @kaekazuha04 @dazaiscum @mayasshitposts @kunikuzi @ruisann (taglist full)

[eepyuii]

frostbite — pt. 10

pairing ; childe x gender neutral!reader

content ; childhood friends to “rivals” to lovers, slowburn-ish

cw ; none. idiots in love

notes ; ITS YEARNING HOURS BAYBEE ‼️ for the first time ever, a bit of childe’s POV, wowie zowie!! also a bit of a cheesy chapter LMFAO, it’s just these two dinguses “reaching” the realization that they want each other so bad, it makes them look stupid.

also a smidgen hint at the end towards the next phase of this dumpster fire of a fic >:3

ok and finally- i know i already made a post abt it but like. would u guys still love me if i posted a luke castellan fic? it’s SO self indulgent bc i’m brain rotting from the percy jackson show so idk yet :>

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old wooden planks creak with each step childe takes.

he’d long lost the count of the days he’d spent in this peculiar inazuman domain— the mystic omnyou chamber, his companions called it. though what a fascinating domain it was, ever-changing and ever-puzzling but most of all, ever-deploying more enemies for him to fight his way through. he feels like only now he truly knows what teucer must’ve felt like in front of all those mr. cyclopses all those months ago.

he felt as though he was given a little too much breathing room by the motherland, still being stationed in liyue with you whoever knows how long his mission was finished, so it was no less than perfect to hear the news of scaramouche’s disappearance from inazuma after taking the gnosis for himself. as much as he disliked to have to leave you in northland bank with the promise of the two of returning together still at hand, he dully needed to take up on his responsibilities as one of her majesty’s harbingers.

still, he could fair by through the remembrance of you and his love for combat.

it’s amusing how freshly burned into his mind the memory of your time together at dottore’s lab was, even when he was half-conscious and at his physically weakest. how you soothed away his wounds with the cool breeze of your cryo powers, how you kept him company while he recovered, how you called him a pret-

“psst— you’re doing that thing again.”

“h-huh..?”

the harbinger is snapped from his daydreaming by paimon naggingly whispering to him. as childe finds himself back in reality, he registers the sight of the traveler, xinyan and shiki taishou walking ahead distractedly through the narrow dusty hallways of the domain, while paimon had fallen back alongside him.

“are you back now? ok good.” the travel guide snides, hands sassily placed at her hips.

childe chuckles sheepishly. “i-i’m sorry, paimon, but i’m not quite sure what you’re talking about.”

“oh, come on, it’s so obvious! the entire time we’ve been here, you’ve been doing this thing where you either doze off thinking about y/n! y’know as someone so passionate about fighting, you really need to get your head in the game right now.”

he feigns an offended scoff. “that is entirely untrue, comrade. my focus is solely on figuring out this domain’s mysteries and defeating its monsters.”

there’s a brief pause, where childe thoroughly reevaluates what paimon just said.

“wait, how did you know i was thinking about y/n? i-if i were dozing off and possibly thinking about them!”

she scoffs. “puh-lease, you’ve been babbling about them since we got here! almost everything you’ve said has somehow trailed off into y/n, so much so that even shiki taishou is caught up on what’s happened with you two!”

paimon was someone known to be a bit eccentric and overreactive at certain moments, but she also had her moments of being very bluntly honest in other situations. this was one of them. the harbinger deliberates for a moment, out of all the time he’s spent venturing this domain with the paper doll, just how much information had he unwillingly retained about you.

suddenly, a moment of clarity washes over childe and he vividly recalls all the moments during his venture in the domain where he’s talked about you. saying things such as ‘i wonder how y/n is doing right now…’, or ‘hah, y/n’s cryo attacks would demolish these enemies.’ or even ‘oh! that reminds of this one time, when y/n and i were kids…’. lest we mention the multiple times he’s said ‘i can’t wait to return to inazuma with y/n and show them this.’ whenever he’d been exploring the electro land’s scenic locations.

poor shiki taishou.

but then again, is it truly his fault that the mystic omnyou chamber had so many moments and details that were so clearly reminiscent of you? o-or maybe… maybe this was just a domain and everything reminded him of you regardless. but that’s the more unlikely possibility.

he curses scaramouche in his mind for a brief moment. it was all because he decided to go rogue that childe had to leave so abruptly— just when he’d made amends with you, just when the two of you were restoring your friendship. just when you’d started to flash him that devastating smile of yours again, instead of the standoffish snarl you’d presented during his mission in liyue. gods, he could feel his heart pang against his chest. surely it was just the adrenaline of battle, though. even if the group hadn’t faced enemies in more than ten minutes by now.

an even further tucked part of childe’s mind curses paimon next, for pointing out how much he speaks of you, because now he truly cannot stop. he looks ahead towards the end of the corridor and he can’t see what’s next, can’t see the next tatami matted arena where he’ll face a new wave of enemies, something he thinks he wants— no, all he sees is you.

it’s like your face is burned into his retinas, your fond laughter burned into brain and the warm feeling of when he slept against your shoulder burned into his skin.

childe doesn’t doesn’t fight as well as before in the next battle, he’s sloppy and distracted. after the arena is cleared, he’s left with a scratch across his bicep— which, thankfully, the domain grants a healing sigil to mend.

but it’ll never cure him like you do, never soothe the very core of his being like your powers do and it’ll never look at him the same way you did, caring and attentive.

he remembers how he felt lookup up at you then— like you were the stars in the night sky. he needed to get this mission over with as soon as possible.

—

you could almost hear your mother’s nagging tone telling you to not play with your food. as delicious as liyuean cuisine was, you’d lost your appetite halfway through your meal- as well as interest in the tale the restaurant’s storyteller was telling.

it’d been probably the dullest week you’ve had in a while, no new assignments from the motherland, no events happening in the city and… admittedly, no childe.

you can’t find the effort to lie to yourself and say it’s fine that he’s gone, that it’s for the tsaritsa’s noble cause— you don’t care about it. scaramouche could screw off with the gnosis and live his life, as far as you were concerned. in fact, you’d say he deserves it, given all he’s gone through with the doctor, even if he could be an astronomical asshole at times— well most of the times.

and now you can’t decide who to blame for childe’s absence, the balladeer or the tsaritsa. either way, it’s affected you more than you’d ever admit out loud. it’s been such a monotone week not just because of the distinct lack of anything to do in liyue lately, but also because of a distinct lack of… someone to worry about. yeah, that’s what it was, just an unusual sense of calm and nothing to stress over, that’s all—

“even in all my years, i’ve rarely seen someone stare at an unfinished bowl of dragon beard noodles with such intensity.”

a rumbling, baritone voice quips jokingly from across your small table and you’re startled away from your thoughts. looking up, the comment is revealed to come from mr. zhongli, the consultant from wanshe— oh, who were you kidding, the now former geo archon.

you hadn’t formerly spoken to him since the mission to take, well, his gnosis. after the situation with osial was diffusd, you beared witness to an unsettlingly diplomatic exchange between mr. zhongli and the fair lady, where he gave away the very culmination of his divinity like it was spare change. of course, you’ve spotted him countless times around the harbor— merely enjoy the little things the city had to offer. you can’t truly fault him for making the decision that he did, six thousand years is, unspokenly, too much time to not peruse the fruits of his labor from up close.

“a-ah, mr. zhongli! it’s been so long since we last spoke.” you scramble to politely greet zhongli and briefly wonder if you should stand up to bow to him, which he seems to notice.

“my apologies for startling you, doctor— may i?” he gestures to the seat in front of you and you nod.

“yes, it has been some time. i recall you being there for the completion of my contract with the fair lady, but the last time the two of us had the opportunity to meet casually was the very same night we first met.”

you nod curtly— you’re tense, you don’t know why. you know he’s not an archon anymore, you were there to see it, but perhaps the real weight of being in the presence of someone so powerful, not just an archon but the oldest of the original seven, seems to have only settled in now. you feel almost as choked as when in the presence of the tsaritsa, which you know all the same that you shouldn’t be. zhongli chuckles amusedly.

“i ask you to treat me as though you would’ve that night in liuli pavilion, like any other acquaintance. chatting with a mere consultant of a funeral parlor requires no formalities. now— have you been well, doctor?”

you can still only bring yourself to nod wordlessly in response, there’s no need for zhongli to know how royally miserable you’ve been lately.

“and.. may i ask why you held such a glare towards your meal? is it not your liking?”

“oh, no the noodles are just fine, amazing even! i was just… contemplating wether to finish it or not.”

great cover.

“hm,” zhongli hums with playful suspicion. “while a reasonable topic of contemplation, it did very much seem as though you were rather staring through the bowl, as though there is something on your mind. i would not mind hearing what is it that vexes you, doctor— if you’re comfortable to share, of course.”

yeah there was no fooling a, again, six thousand year old divine being with a half-assed excuse like yours. you sigh.

“well— yes, you caught me. the last few days have been, uh… less than peachy for me.”

“what exactly is it troubles you these days?”

“i wouldn’t say it’s trouble but, there hasn’t been much to do at northland bank lately. and childe has been out on a mission for some time now— b-but it’s mainly the lack of assignments!” you stammer.

“is that so? i did hear of childe’s sudden departure for inazuma but it is curious that you’re being kept stationed here with essentially nothing to do. but, if i may— has childe been absent for as long as you’ve felt dull at work or would you say there is no relation?”

already at so few words out of sheer nervousness, zhongli managed still to render you completely and utterly speechless. what are you even supposed to respond to this?

“i-i uhm, i… alright, i won’t even try.” you sigh in defeat and zhongli looks coyly pleased. he patiently awaits for you to gather your thoughts and actually say more than two stammered sentences.

“i truly can’t tell what it is. i feel like i’m supposed to be worrying for him— as if he’ll get injured again or injure someone else o-or even worse, do something stupid but there’s just.. nothing! it’s like i’m so used to being aware of his presence and now there’s nothing and it’s- it’s frustrating.”

“you miss him.”

you pause. do you miss him? no, it can’t be so simple— you have a medical degree, it is most certainly improbable that you’ve been trying your brain over just missing childe. well, sure it was great that the two of you were starting to make amends and stopped being so on-edge around each other but… there’s no objective reason for you to miss him.

right?

“i would not say i even near the level of an expert on matters concerning relationships between people, but i’ve seen a lot in my time. enough to tell you with confidence that it’s most likely you just.. miss him, doctor. and that it is okay to feel this way. the two of you do not stand at odds anymore, you never have— it is reasonable for you to be affected by his absence.”

you furrow your eyebrows. “how do you know if… childe and i stand at odds, mr. zhongli.”

“well, i have witnessed it. both directly and indirectly— the tension and misunderstanding between the two of you during our meeting at liuli pavilion was quite evident and i’ve heard of how you opposed him in battle at the golden house. but that is all it has ever been, misunderstandings and disagreements, but you’ve never truly disliked each other.”

“h-how do you know-“

“he speaks quite highly of you, doctor.”

“wh-what?”

“childe has only ever spoken highly of you— i recall mentioning that had been looking forward to meeting you in person during our dinner, it is all because of how grand his description of you was. plus, during our eventual meetups, you’re mentioned at least once every time. and you, as we’ve discussed, do seem to hold some care towards him, to the extent that you first concern is his health.”

your heart aches and you hate it. it’s a terrible, void sensation that frustrates you to no end. why? why did childe have to make it so difficult for you? why can’t you ever feel simple feelings when it came to him? why couldn’t you ever just feel one way towards him with no smaller part of your brain saying something else? even worse, why couldn’t your brain ever think about anything else— literally anything, instead of just constantly orbiting around the mixed emotions you felt when it came to childe?

you just constantly, restlessly and unendingly seem to care about him.

“you know what, mr. zhongli, i think y—“

“ah, there you are, sergeant!”

a less familiar voice calls out from behind you and you turn around with a bit of surprise— it’s a man clad in fatui uniform, who you recognize as mikhail, one of the officers stationed at northland bank. he’s not exactly someone you interact much with, just a mere coworker you greet every other morning, so you’re perplexed as to why he’s seeking you outside the bank.

“mikhail, what is the occasion?” you ask, briefly eyeing zhongli to find that he remains with a neutral expression awaiting the exchange.

“i am deeply sorry for interrupting your lunch, sergeant, but ekaterina urged for me to find you as soon as i could. a letter has come in from lord dottore for you specifically— she says it is of utmost importance.”

—

the wharf is unusually crowded today.

an untimely flux of either tourists or returning immigrant citizens, perhaps it is an important time of year in another nation— although, childe could truly care less at the moment. he’s doing his best to politely push his way through the sea of people leaving their respective ships while almost unconsciously seeking you out within it. he knows you wouldn’t be here, as his return to liyue was unannounced, but his eyes fly to latch onto your likeness anyway.

childe ends up finding you right in the center of the harbor’s main street, practically right below the catwalks that lead to the bank. you’re slowly pacing back and forth, a piece of paper clutched in your hands and a vacant expression on your face— childe can’t find himself to clutch to those details right now, he just needs to get to your side. he makes large, determined steps towards you, big grin invading his features, and while he’s still approaching you, you spot him and your eyes widen even more. once childe is a mere two steps away from you, he stops.

“y/n! oh, it’s so good to see you!” he heaves out gladly.

“ajax—“ you reply in a quiet voice and his heart swells at the use of his real name. he truly can’t contain himself anymore and tackles you into a tight hug, one so strong that stumble back a bit.

his arms snake tightly from under your arms to above your shoulders and his head lowers from being against your own to reaching your shoulder blade— it is as close as he physically get to you, while trying to be respectful of your space, of course. you’re still in shock for maybe five seconds of the hug, but eventually you just let yourself slowly wrap around him and squeeze ever so slightly. both of you have your eyes closed to sink into the moment.

the hug is long, maybe twenty seconds so, and as childe becomes satisfied with its duration and pulls away, he remains with his hands to your elbows in a gentle hold. he sighs with said satisfaction and beams towards you.

“i have so much to tell you about inazuma! unfortunately, i couldn’t find scaramouche there but i managed to see so many beautiful places, so many amazing experie- wait.. what’s wrong?”

the harbinger pauses mid sentence when he notices the numbness in your expression and his bright grin falls into a concerned frown— you feel like the most terrible person for making him lose such excitement. your mouth opens and closes as you find what to say, but you eventually whisper it out.

“ajax, i-i… i have to go to sumeru.”

taglist ; @kentply @osaemu @rain-and-a-nice-nap @koichirana

[yuzukult]

yours, but not yours 03 (m) || csc & reader

title: yours, but not yours 03 pairing: choi seungcheol x fem!reader/oc genre: angst, fluff, smut, fake dating!au, bad influence!seungcheol, nice guy syndrome!namjoon, mechanic!seungcheol wc: 7.4k summary: when a nice guy gets too overbearing, you’re stuck with the option of having a fake boyfriend. warnings: oral sex (f.receiving) a/n: omg sorry for the delay... i’ve been in a really bad writing slump LOL if there’s some errors... ignore them. the fact i even finish this deserves a pat on the back LMFAO also thx @/cheolbooluvr ig for beta reading

Seungcheol stumbles back, wiping the red that formulates on the side of his lips. “Did you just fucking punch me?”

If there’s anyone he hated the most, Namjoon just kicked them off the top of the list and claimed the throne as his own. The fire that sets ablaze underneath Seungcheol’s skin is evident—the milky skin of his is flushed tints of scarlet, deep as wine and grows warm like the scorching sun.

Namjoon smirks, head tilted back with his chin up high like this is his territory and Seungcheol is a trespasser. It makes Seungcheol feel like he’s in one of those movies on National Geographic—he’s acting as if he’s a lion and you’re the lioness, while Seungcheol is just some opponent who wants what Namjoon has. He’s got his arms crossed over his chest, sucking in his cheeks for a brief moment before letting out the most brazen chuckle. He thinks he’s won, that smug look on his face giving it away. “Do you need a playback? I’ll do it again.”

In complete disbelief, Seungcheol scoffs. It takes all within him not to bash Namjoon’s face in but with you standing there, he can’t bring himself to show this crude side of himself in front of you. You don’t deserve to see him tear Namjoon to shreds—you deserve so much better than a guy who gets into fights instead of handling it civilly. He wants to be that, the kind of person you want, but when Namjoon takes the silence as a ‘yes,’ he’s prepared for another swing with a fist by his side. 

“Alright, that’s enough,” you chime in sternly, ready to interject but Namjoon is already pulling his arm back and driving a punch into Seungcheol’s jaw with all his might, awaiting that pleasant sound of his bones cracking from the impact.

Only that it doesn’t.

Seungcheol has his arm extended, palm out and against Namjoon’s knuckles as he continues to dab the blood from the cut. It’s almost like it’s from a scene of a film, out on the schoolyard with rivals from different schools ready to rumble. “Chill the fuck out. You don’t gotta go home but you can’t stay here. I’m not gonna hit you, if that’s what you think is gonna happen because I don’t waste my energy on guys like you.”

The silence is deafening—Seungcheol could almost hear the ringing in his ears from it. Namjoon doesn’t aim very well, but the strength behind his fist is strong enough for Seungcheol to suspect a sore jaw tomorrow. They can’t pull their threatening stares from each other, flames burning in their eyes, with teeths clenched down in semblance to the balled hands at their sides. 

You’re quick to shatter the glass of quietude, caring nothing more than to end this. You see why cigarettes tempt Seungcheol—suddenly your lungs are craving that breath of relief. “Go home.”

“You heard her,” Namjoon sneers. “She said go home. Guess you weren’t being a good boyfriend, huh.”

“I meant you.”

The two men turn to look at you.

“Namjoon, go home,” you reiterate, never stuttering over your words. “You don’t get to come here, to my house and punch someone in the face because you’re unhappy with something. You don’t get to act like a child, throwing a tantrum because you didn’t get the trophy girl and quite frankly, I’m not one. You’ve never once given me a decision tonight, thinking that it was better to come in place for Yubin, and none of this was discussed with me. When did you get to dictate my life?”

Namjoon drops his arm from Seungcheol, attention pivoting to you. “We had fun tonight, babe. I’m just doing what’s best for you,” he says, his favorite, signature line never fails to spill when it comes to you. Namjoon has developed this image of you that’s incapable of determining who would be the right fit for you because you ‘don’t know what you deserve.’ But it feels like every guy you choose doesn’t fit his criteria. “I want you to be with a guy that gives you it all, who takes care of you, who loves you, and gives what you truly deserve.”

“And what? You think that Seungcheol can’t offer that to me?” Inhaling in a deep breath, your lids squeeze shut. He’s your best friend’s brother, and although the trope is a cliche that you love, you didn’t love it in this scenario or when it involves yourself. “Namjoon,” you begin again; when your eyes lock on his, he sees the solemnity saturated in them. “It’s great that you care, but you’re overbearing and stepping over boundaries. Go home.”

It doesn’t take Namjoon long to slam the door with a scowl, driving off with his exhaust puffing smoke in your face. 

Rubbing your eyes, you let out a heavy breath that you’ve been holding the entire time. You felt a mixture of embarrassment and anger—from Namjoon making a move on you when you clearly weren’t interested, to him punching Seungcheol in the face—it's hard to even give Namjoon any type of margin of error when his toxic behavior is so awfully constant. 

“How you feelin’, pretty?”

Even with his jaw fractured and a hand against his cheek, he still manages to compliment you through his cherry stained lips. “If you’re askin’ bout me, I ain’t feeling so hot.”

“I can see that,” you retort with the roll of your eyes, tugging on his jacket sleeve up the stairs of your home. “Let’s get you cleaned up, yeah?”

Seungcheol is a simple guy. 

He sees you, and immediately his mind goes blank. Seungcheol is like a smittened 12 year old when they see a pretty girl for the first time; his mouth goes dry, all possible words get suctioned off his tongue, and his lips part as if he has something to say but it never comes out. He’s never been really good at expressing his emotions; elaborating clearly how he felt for you was an obstacle he had trouble 

So when you point to the dining chair placed in your small kitchen, he obediently does as he’s asked while you scramble to find a first aid kit in your storage closet instead of contesting it. He’s better at actions and gestures than words, so if it meant being like a well-trained puppy for you to understand the lengths of his likeness for you, then so be it.

“So… you and Namjoon…”

“Should I just stop feeling guilty and cut him off?” you interrupt, sighing as you drop the plastic box onto the square table. He notices everything here is kept minimal—two seats at the table, a loveseat couch, only two pairs of slippers for guests, and that was it. There is no intention of more, almost like you purposely don’t want anyone else coming in. “If it’s gotten to the point that he’s punching my fake boyfriend, it’s beyond ridiculous. There’s no boundaries when it comes to him, and it’s unfair that I have to constantly watch everything I do or say just to make sure I don’t upset him.”

“Should just cut ‘em off,” he spits, rotating his jaw. “He’s done nuffin’ but upset you. Stop being concerned ‘bout how he’s feeling and worry ‘bout yourself.”

You roll your eyes, tearing the wrapping of the alcohol wipe as you settle in the chair in front of him. “He’s my best friend’s brother.”

“This isn’t some romantic comedy. Stop naming that stupid trope. Tell Namjoon to quit and put your foot down. You’ve got a boyfriend now, and he’s gotta respect that,” Seungcheol says sternly, puffing his chest as if he’s all riled up.

Letting out a laugh, you shake your head as you wipe off the blood that dries on his wound. With a wince, he grimaces as he leans back. “Stop moving,” you nag before grabbing the ointment in the box. Squeezing a dollop into your finger, you apply it on gingerly as he scrunches up his face in fear of the pain, but it never comes. 

Physically, at least.

“If I’m your girlfriend, then why haven’t I met your family yet?” you joke, but Seungcheol tenses up.

Family. The word alone causes his whole body to stiffen and his jaw to tighten. Before he could react, you’re already stumbling atop him as a loud crack is heard, and his first instinct is to pull you onto his lap.

“Oh, fuck—”

“Geez, baby, if you wanted to ride on my dick so bad, you should’ve just said so. No need to break your chair for it.”

Somehow, you find yourself seated on his thigh, arms wrapped around his shoulders, and nose nearly brushing his. You can feel his breath ghosting your lips, the stench of cigarettes permeated in the fabric of his clothes, but you prefer this over Namjoon’s cologne. He smells… heavenly. It’s  like you are intoxicated, unable to control your thoughts properly, heart pacing faster than the cars you see on race tracks.

“I…” you gulp. Is he going to kiss you? His lips are so plump, cherry red, and visibly sweet. Unfiltered thoughts spill through your head; you want to taste his honeyed lips on yours, his hands roaming all around you. But you can’t have that. Right? But he’s so fucking close, you swear he’s gonna lean in for a kiss. Eyes hooded, he’s in a daze of you, equally as drunk on your scent. Notes of white jasmine—whatever the fuck that is, but he remembered seeing it on a body shampoo bottle in the bathroom. You smell sweet, with hints of something fruity and floral. He wants to drown in you.

And he manages to slip out the words that nearly have you tumbling.

“Wanna kiss?” 

Did your heart just stop beating?

You’re vacuumed from any words—you and Seungcheol don’t work, but why do you want his lips slotted into yours? He doesn’t fit the requirements of what kind of guy you want, the kind of guy you see yourself with–the fact that your first encounter with him resulted being under the sheets with your body against his, there’s no way he’d ever be anything more.

So, why does he make you feel this churning inside the pit of your stomach?

He chuckles, pushing his hair back and away from his face. Leaning back against your chair, he watches as you quickly shuffle off of him and clear your throat as heat floods your cheeks. “I’m just kiddin’. Maybe you should get new chairs, love.”

You sigh; the chair on the floor has its wooden leg split. It should’ve been a sign about a month ago when the creaking first started… and when you continued to hear the crack of the wood with each time your ass made contact with it, but procrastination seemed like the better option in those moments. “I—” you puff your cheeks in annoyance. The damaged furniture is the least of your problems right now. Turning to Seungcheol, you place your hands on your hips. “We need to establish some boundaries.”

With a quirked brow, he scoffs. “Boundaries? You’re the kidder now.”

“I’m just saying,” you begin to pace, huffing. “We can’t—this can’t be more than it is. We’re just two people who had sex once—” Seungcheol clicks his tongue as he crosses his arms while narrowing his eyes on you. “—a couple times, but that’s it. You’re just gonna be my fake boyfriend in front of my friends so they can back off with Namjoon. Capeesh?”

“You know, the fact you gotta lie to your friends sorta means that they ain’t good ones.”

“Well, outside of Namjoon, I like them, alright?”

“I’m just sayin’,” he adds, raising his hands up in defeat. “I’ll do what you want, baby, but you’re ova here tryna set boundaries with me when you should be doin’ that with your friends, too. But I like you, and you’re sexy when you’re serious, so I’ll bite. Gimme your conditions.”

Inhaling sharply, you walk over to the desk beside your bed to shuffle through the drawers for a sheet of paper and a marker. “Okay,” you begin, slamming the computer paper into the table. “This is our terms. Let’s start off with number one. No fucking.”

Seungcheol chuckles, watching as you scribble the words. “We already fucked, baby.”

“Well, anymore. No dilly-dallying. We’re strictly business, Seungcheol.”

“Alright,” he raises his arms in defeat. “Whatever you want, baby. What’s next?”

“No catching feelings—”

“—Can we decide on rules that we haven’t already broken?” He quirks a brow before leaning forward with his elbows propped on his knees. “You know I like you. Very much. Not just in the way to get in your pants, but more. So maybe… pick rules that we haven’t already broken, yeah?”

You puff your cheeks. “Fine. We’re just faking in front of my friends, right? So, I need you to be on your best behavior around them—I want them to believe that we’re real so that they can finally just come to terms that there are other guys that aren’t Namjoon.”

“You know,” he begins, tapping his foot against the wooden floors. “I still want my part of the deal upheld.”

You blink. “I must’ve missed that. What was it?”

“This is a trial,” he reiterates from the time before. “This is you considering me outside of just an acquaintance. A potential boyfriend.”

There’s a moment of silence before you let out an awkward laugh. “Let’s uh… let’s get back to the boundaries… yeah? How about… no fucking, no catching feelings, no sleeping over—”

“—All broken, but go on.”

You shoot a glare at Seungcheol before continuing. “No family involved. No telling people that we aren’t together, and lastly, this is exclusive.”

This intrigues Seungcheol. “Oh, well that’s new. I didn’t think you were the possessive type. Thought you didn’t like me, love.”

“It’s to spare anyone’s feelings,” you state sternly, writing down the rules onto the piece of paper. “I don’t want someone coming up to me later down the line, asking why you led them on when you were with me the entire time.”

“You know,” he begins, crossing his arms against his chest. “I keep telling you the same shit like a scratched up record. I like you, and I want to be with you. There won’t be another girl, so that rule is easy for me. The rest—can’t say that they won’t, though.”

“Seungcheol.”

He grins. “I’m kidding. But you know I’ll try for you, baby.”

Why does Choi Seungcheol do that thing where he makes the insides of your stomach feel sick? Is it because he’s absolutely repulsive?

Or is it because he’s actually swooning you?

“Where do you think you’re going?” 

You’re left frozen from how close he is. Seungcheol gently brushes his nose against yours, eyes hooded but irises dark and swirling with lust. He manages to steal the breath from your lungs so effortlessly, the cause of you stuttering over your words, and suddenly unable to be crude and blunt because Seungcheol is intoxicating.

Swallowing, you stumble back a bit. Palms resting against the hood of the bright red Audi in your garage—well now his garage, you’re not even sure how you ended up like this. “Uh, to… to my house.”

“You’re not going anywhere,” he counters, furrowing his brows. “You called me a fuckboy, mocked me, then when I act upon those ‘so-called’ talents, that sharp tongue of yours has nothing left to say?”

You clear your throat. “I’m just… Who cages someone after getting their ass roasted?”

He chuckles; it’s deep and hearty from his chest, head dropped down momentarily before his gaze meets back up with yours. “Wanna see how a fuckboy fucks?”

Mouth parted, now you’re really at a loss for words.

Leaning in, he pecks the side of your mouth with a wink before his hands grab the thickness of your thighs and tugs you lower on the hood of the car. With a yelp, you fall back onto your elbows as Seungcheol slides down in between your legs. 

You’re debating if you should be thankful you chose a skirt this morning or wishing you had on jeans instead so you’d at least have the self discipline to push him away.

But when he looks like that, he makes it hard to.

“Just tell me if you don’t want this,” he says reassuringly, fingers playing with the hem of your miniskirt. He likes this color on you—beige is so neutral on other girls, but when you strut in it, you bring light to it. “But if you do, and you’ve got your hand covering your mouth to hold in those pretty moans, I’m gonna have to ask you to let go.”

And with that, he disappears in between your legs.

Seungcheol pulls your hips even closer to his mouth, desperately wishing he could live in your pussy forever. You taste sweet; his favorite treat from now on, and when he hears those melodic moans slip between your swollen lips, it causes the hardness in his jeans to twitch.

“Fuck, baby,” he mutters against your wet folds. “I could do this all day.”

From the last time you fucked, Seungcheol makes it clear: he hates when you pull on his hair. There’s nothing worse than someone tugging on your strands, especially when they have no sense of control and end up hurting your scalp. And despite the fact that he enmitizes it, there’s something about you and when your pretty hands are knotted in his ebony locks.

“Fuck,” he says, and at first, it sounded like it was from pleasure of eating you out.

But when he curses the second time, it sounds more like pain.

“Fuck!”

Your eyes flutter open.

“Fuck!”

Fuck indeed.

You were fucking daydreaming.

Seated on the couch in the corner of the garage, you get the best view of Seungcheol. He’s underneath the hood of your car, working on whatever it was that made that weird sputtering sound yesterday, and definitely not underneath your skirt. Just your car.

“Fuck!” he exclaims again. “Are you just gonna sit there and watch me? I knocked over the rod and your hood fell on my head.”

“Sorry!”

Immediately, you’re at his side, lifting the hood while propping it back up with the metal rod. When Seungcheol finally shuffles out, he stands there, puffing with his chest out. You could already imagine all the thoughts that were running through his head because how did you miss that entire incident? “What the fuck was that? I was calling you for like five minutes—you were totally zoned out.”

You roll your eyes. “It wasn’t five minutes.”

“It wasn’t, but it sure felt like it.” 

Valid. He was stuck so it probably felt like an eternity.

As he rubs his head with a grunt, you can’t help but get flustered at where your thoughts drove through. Did you really just whip up an entire scenario where Seungcheol was tongue deep between your folds on some stranger’s car? And why the fuck did it feel so realistic?

This thing between the two of you is supposed to end in a fake relationship. No strings attached—no sex, everything kept a secret, and the end goal was to showcase that yes, there are other guys out there that are better than Namjoon and can be a candidate. 

Then again, it was hard to hold off your raging hormones when Seungcheol is just fucking standing there in that tight black tee with the fabric of the sleeves snug around his bicep. He’s not even doing anything and yet somehow he’s got your panties wet. Are you exactly like those other bitches? The answer is yes. And you’re more than just embarrassed by it.

He nods his head. “The fuck you thinking about over there? Lost ya for a second,” he reached over to grab the stained rag to wipe off his calloused hands. “You thinkin’ about me bending you over a car?”

Yes.

You know he’s joking, but it’s 100% true. And you’d be stupid to ever admit to it.

“I—Honestly, I’m not going to waste my breath answering that.”

He chuckles, just as thick and honeyed as in your daydream, except he’s the reality of it. For some reason, with how the sunset hits into the garage, he looks… handsome like this. Hues of orange, red, and yellow makes him glow, causing your heart to stutter in its beats for a brief moment. His lashes are long, brushing against the highs of his cheekbones gingerly, pomegranate lips plump and look like they’d be pillowy if you got to press your own against it and you could imagine they tasted just as sweet as the fruit. The injuries he sustained from Namjoon are almost entirely healed, but it complimented him well. He sort of had that bad boy-esque look going for him; the bruised cheek, scar at the corner of his mouth, the leather jacket, and the motorcycle?

You’re a liar if you said that you didn’t want to hop on his dick one more time.

And for some reason, your heart wanted to jump his too.

“Well, you came all the way here to talk to me and not just hang. What did you need from me?”

Right. You came here to ask for another favor. Why are these thoughts plaguing your once-logical brain? You have a MBA for fucks sake but all it took was good dick to scourge sanity with horniness.

“So,” you begin, rolling your lips. It’s intimidating to request this from him, only because you know how much he has to go out of his comfort zone to do it. “The girls and I were talking…”

Seungcheol raises a brow at you drifting off mid-sentence as you lean against the car as coolly as possible—even though he stifles a laugh at the sight. “Stop beating around the bush.”

“They want a weekend getaway at a log cabin by the lake.”

Confused, he puts down the wrench he picks up moments ago with a clang. “With just… you… or? ‘Cause baby, I know I’m your boyfriend, but you don’t need my permission for that.”

With a groan, you throw your head back. “No, no, I’m indirectly asking you to tag along and… be my boyfriend.”

“For the weekend?”

You sigh. “Yeah.”

“With… your friends and their boyfriends?”

Where was he going with this? “Uh, yeah.”

“Alright, cool. I’m down.”

Truthfully, you should’ve known something was up with how easy it was to convince Seungcheol to go. 

He’s got a spare helmet in the space behind him on the bike, patting the leather spot reserved for just you while showcasing that dumb cheeky grin on his face. “Hop on.”

“I’m not riding that.”

“Oh come on, you’ve ridden other dangerous things. Take my dick for example.”

You clench your fists by your side but they mean no threat to him. “I’m not riding your stupid motorcycle, Seungcheol. It’s dangerous! What’s wrong with my car?”

He actually has to cover his mouth because he laughed so hard in disbelief. “Baby, that shit is an actual death trap in comparison to my bike. Plus, I’ve always wanted to drive on the road that leads to the cabin. I heard it’s got the freshest air this place has to offer.”

“Again, I’m not riding your bike, Choi Seungcheol.”

Seungcheol is usually a typical fuckboy. Girls, just girls as a whole, is the easiest way to convince him to do something. These days, even when his friends promise the sluttiest girls at the bar, he doesn’t go. Instead, he finds himself in the garage underneath the apartment, in hopes you’d be bored and come down in your little tank top and cartoon fuzzy pj pants and sit to keep him company. He’s gone soft, he sadly admits, but at the same time he doesn’t mind it.

But Seungcheol is still deep down some type of fuckboy. 

And when you cross your arms over your chest, pushing up your tits in that bra he suddenly has marked on his list of things that make him happy, he gets a sneak peak of your cleavage in that tshirt. 

He’s technically not a fuckboy anymore because he only sees you.

But getting rid of that side of himself that caves into the sight of tits would be hard. Especially when they’re yours.

He’s already packing up the helmets and parking his bike in the garage while snatching the keys to your shitty Toyota off the hook on the wall.

Candidly speaking, he isn’t entirely sure what to make out of this. He knows that whatever it is between the two of you at the moment is just a facade, despite that fact you know the feelings he harbors, but a part of him is perplexed at how easy it is for him to just… give you what you want. Seungcheol doesn’t do that. He’s not the type of guy who gives in without much of a battle. 

Everything with you is a new experience for him.

Even driving in a Toyota, for fucks sake, because he’d be caught dead driving in a piece of junk if his parents found out. Or even staying in some cabin on a weekend “getaway” by a lake, which by the way, he’s not even sure what a trip like that entails either. Do people swim in lakes? And if they do, why would they willingly want to bathe in dirty water?

However, the sight of you, so bright and eager when you spot your friends at the door of the cabin (which is oddly way bigger than he imagined), makes all the discomfort go away. It didn’t matter that mosquitoes were going to bite him fourteen times, that he was never going to get the smell of firewood out of his clothes for the next three months, and that if he agreed to swim in that swampy ass water, he’d probably get sucked in by some monster created from all the shit people dumped into the lake. All because his attendance makes you happy, he doesn’t mind it.

That is, until he spots the expression on your face drop and the culprit standing beside Yubin on the second floor balcony.

Seungcheol nudges your side gently. “Did they tell you he was coming?”

The stoic look gives the answer away before you say it. “No, they didn’t.”

Seungcheol slings the bags over his shoulder, trailing behind you and up the creaky wooden steps while praying he doesn’t fall into the abyss if any of the flooring breaks. He doesn’t complain, you note, but you’ll compliment him on it another time.

Namjoon is here, and he shouldn’t be.

“Okay,” Yubin calls out in the middle of the hallway that you’ve stomped your way to. She has her hand out like it would be some type of Captain America shield but it doesn’t do shit. “I know you’re mad, and you don’t want him here—but he made a hefty deposit for this weekend and we can’t just… uninvite him.”

“You could and I would’ve more than gladly covered it.”

“It’s not about that,” she sighs, running her fingers through her hair. “You know I can’t choose between my best friend and my brother. Can’t you at least be civil about it?”

You scoff, brows furrowing while shaking your head. “Did he even tell you that he punched Seungcheol?”

She licks her lips before sinking her teeth into the flesh. “I—No, he didn’t, but I’m sure he had a good reason.”

“Yubin, you realize what you’re saying, right? He swung at my boyfriend.”

“I know, and I—”

You don’t even let her finish. Turning around, Seungcheol stands there with your bags on his shoulder and his own duffle in hand. Abruptly, you grab onto his wrist and lead him down the stairs as Yubin follows behind. “We’re leaving, Cheol, go start the car.”

“But we just got here—”

“Now,” you demand sternly, and Seungcheol straightens his mouth. He wants to tell you to just enjoy the weekend without interacting with Namjoon, especially with how many people are here, but he respects your decision. It’s Namjoon you were trying to avoid, and the only place Seungcheol won’t try to inject his opinions on. “Get ready.”

Before he could step out, Chaeryong blocks him in. “No,” she looks at him then at you. “No,” she emphasizes a second time as she points her finger in your direction. “We’re not doing this. You’re staying. Don’t make Seungcheol drive the two hours back just because of Namjoon.”

“I don’t wanna fucking talk—”

“Then don’t!” she exclaims; it’s almost like she’s finally releasing the frustrations she’s been holding back. “Fuck that, you have your boyfriend right here, so just have a nice weekend with us and him. Sure, Namjoon will be around, but why’s that matter when Seungcheol is here?”

Although Chaeryong makes a good point, you can’t help but feel the blood in your veins boiling when you see him. He swung a fist at Seungcheol, the only person (despite his potty mouth) who actually seemed to listen and respect both you and your feelings all because Namjoon claims that he knew what was “best” for you?

You close your eyes. Inhaling in a deep breath, you release it slowly before easing your lids open to look at Chaeryong. “Yubin let him come, despite knowing how I feel about him.”

“Well,” Chaeryong begins with a forced smile. “That’s a fucked up best friend. Please stay. It’s my last trip as a single woman.”

You quirk a brow. “You’re engaged, Chae.”

“I know,” she jokes, nudging you. “But I don’t know what life will be like after I get married. People change, things change. And I want at least one perfect weekend with the people I’m closest with.”

It wasn’t just her words that sway you, but the look in her eyes. How those chocolate irises are filled with pleas, the fronts of her brows curling up as she says that key word one last time. “Please?”

It’s gonna be a fucking long two days. 

Yubin can feel the tension; she knows you’re upset, but what grinds your gears is that she can’t even be bothered to try resolving any of this. She doesn’t seem to understand how you feel, and how her actions only caused a strain in your friendship.

Was she even your best friend?

And what’s worse is that you were so angry, you almost missed all the things Seungcheol was doing that was definitely not something he’s used to.

For one, he mans the grill. He rolls the sleeves of his shirt up to his elbows, exposing his flexed forearms with his veins popping, you almost lose your train of thought because of him. Truthfully, you’re not even sure if he knows how to cook anything other than a bowl of ramen, and you’re confident he only learned that just to get into a girl’s pants. 

Eventually, you realize he’s not that good at it when he drops a perfectly good piece of steak on the ground.

“We should just toss it,” he says, and four of your friends, including yourself, stare at him in astonishment. “What?”

“It’s a $30 piece of steak. We’re just gonna wash it and eat it—how do you just throw away $30 worth of steak?”

Seungcheol shrugs. “It’s… it’s not that much.”

You don’t know Seungcheol that well, but you know parts about him that you’re unsure are worthwhile. For one, he seems to not be able to understand the value of money. He doesn’t talk about his upbringing, but questions begin to flood in your mind on what his childhood was like because how do you think $30 is cheap? Yeah, you knew he had a crush on you and he likes the way you make ramen for him (boil the noodle first, drain the starchy water, add new boiled water with the powder packets in the bag, crack an egg, and add kimchi with two pieces of seaweed), but in actuality, you didn’t know the real Seungcheol. And you sort of want to.

Then again, he isn’t your boyfriend. He’s just someone pretending to be. 

But the urge to get to know him is beginning to be hard to swallow. Yet your consciousness remains reliable each time it hits you like a train to bring up one thing you seem to forget when he looks at you in that way: Seungcheol is and always will be a fuckboy. 

Maybe staying wasn’t a bad decision after all. When you lean against the railing of the terrace, the breeze flows through your hair coolly and soothes your burning skin temporarily from the summer’s wrath. The sun begins to set in the horizon, the lovely warm shades cast over the cabin’s property—it’s sweet, sort of reminds you of pouring honey in a cup of chrysanthemum tea, the petals infused with the water that boiled in the kettle over a soft fire. 

Chaeryong and her fiancé are exactly that.

You spot them a couple miles away, seated on a picnic blanket with Chaeryong’s head on his shoulder as he presses a kiss gingerly on the top of it. 

God, when will it be your turn?

You sigh. Chin resting against the palm of your hand, your shoulder drops. Watching them from a distance is just a reminder that you’re single and have been for quite some time. Tinder has been dry—not because your dms don’t get flooded but because you’re exhausted from seeing all those pictures of guys with their shirt in between their teeth while taking a mirror selfie with their abs out on display. Blind dates aren’t fun either. They’re blind for a reason—there’s so many fucking red flags, of course traits are going to be hidden from you. The last time you went on one, the guy claimed to be a surgeon. Turns out, he just loved taxidermy. Just because you know the workings of a knife doesn’t make you a surgeon, Will.

Bars are just for fucking—don’t forget clubs too. Friends of friends just doesn’t sit right—what happens if you break up with them? Wouldn’t that be awkward for the group to hang out again? Not to mention that it feels like the majority of the male population seems to not have a bone in their body with the etiquette and politeness that gentlemen used to have. (Not that you’re looking for an old fashioned man—you just want someone nice and caring).

You’ll continue to find it hard to believe, but speaking of the Devil, Seungcheol approaches from behind and leans up against the railing beside you. “Hey.”

“Hey,” you respond, not even realizing how down you sound. “What’s up?”

He furrows his brows, now concerned. “What’s wrong?”

“Nothing.”

Seungcheol hisses in annoyance. He reads you like an open book.

“I just—” you grumble midway, rubbing your face with your hand. “Am I ever going to find love, Cheol? Like I’m tired. Worn out. Fatigued. Weary. Drained. Exasperated. Bitter. Indignant—”

“Alright, thesaurus.com. I get it, you’re tired of feeling like you’ll never be loved. But what about me?”

You roll your eyes. “What about you?”

He clicks his tongue. In a moment like this, he yearns for the stick in between his fingers, the head of the cigarette in the corner of his pomegranate pink lips as he drags in a puff to relieve that annoyance you bring to him each time you reject his feelings. He misses the sensation that occurs when he releases the smoke, almost like his filtering the negativity within him while blackening his lungs. It’s a give and take relationship. More than he’ll ever have with you, it seems.

“Baby, how many times do I have to tell you that I like you,” he says irritably, different from the times he’s said it before. “It’s getting exhausting. Tiring. Draining. Fatiguing—”

“Okay, okay,” you wave your hand dismissively at him. “I get it, I’m being a little dramatic.”

“I don’t think you’re being dramatic. But I do think you’re being unreasonable when you think I’m lying when I tell you my feelings.” Oh, how badly he wants a cigarette right now. It’s like talking to the wall when it comes to you.

“Come on, Cheol,” you laugh, turning around to rest your back against the hard metal fence. “You don’t really like me. You like the idea of it—someone who rejects you because they want something more. You don’t get that often and it’s alluring to you.”

His mouth falls agape like a reflex; the apathetic attitude you had toward him when it came to his emotions plagues pain in his chest. It spreads like rapid fire—fist clenching and jaw tensing, it’s almost similar to the rage that heats up inside from when Namjoon’s knuckles aim for his jaw.

But that’s what it was. Just similar.

The fury in him blossoms instead of explodes. With you, he doesn’t feel the urge to be pissed but disappointed felt like a more appropriate term. 

Seungcheol scoffs, shaking his head. “I—You know what, I’m done talking to you for tonight. I’m so tired, you know, just trying to tell you straight up that I like you. I don’t know what shit I gotta spit out to make you see that.”

You puff your cheeks. He’s frustrated, you get that, but how do you trust someone who struts around with the label ‘fuckboy’ plastered across his forehead? “You don’t love me, Seungcheol. I think you like the idea—”

“Please, please,” he says in a pleading tone. “Cut that shit out. Tell me, do you wanna hear me tell you that I ‘love’ you before we even get together? That doesn’t go with your ‘love plan,’ does it?”

Heart tightening at his words, guilt suddenly washes over your face. “Cheol—”

“I get that falling in love with me is unconventional—we fucked without even a date, and I’m your fake boyfriend before being your real one. We’re backwards—that’s fine, and I know I’m not necessarily the boy-next-door type of guy, but that doesn’t mean I don’t have potential either,” he huffs, pushing his hair back and away from his forehead before shutting his eyes. “Look, I’m gonna walk away now. You take what I say as you will, but I’m wishing, I’m hoping you’d believe me and listen to me just for once. I don’t feel like talking to you right now, so if you will, I’m gonna just—I don’t fucking know—I’ll go talk to the guys. See you back at the room, yeah?”

Fuck. You know you fucked up.

The fact that Seungcheol chooses to go talk to the men that don’t have anything in common with him (including Namjoon) over standing here with you meant more than it seems. He hates those types of guys—the ones that stand there with polo shirts, patterned shorts and gelled slick back hair with a beer in hand talking about work. They didn’t have hobbies outside of golfing and drinking IPAs, and most of the time, blamed their girlfriends for the instability of their relationships (also you will always side with your girls), never taking into account any of their faults. 

Seungcheol wasn’t like those guys—and as funny as it sounds, he wasn’t like the other guys.

Did he really like you? Truly like you and not that kind of stuff where you’d go through all the hurdles to get together only for him to get bored. Did he prefer the thrills of chasing or was he into doing mundane things with you like cleaning around the house or hanging up wet laundry? What about the whole thing with Namjoon? Does he need constant competition in order to value you?

What goes on in Choi Seungcheol’s mind?

You can’t really tell, but if you were realistic with yourself, you’d just ask him straightforwardly and he would do his best to answer. Instead, you choose this route instead—watch him from the porch as he tries to adjust himself in a group of people who weren’t like him and probably asked him questions like: “What stocks have you invested in?” “Does your girl like to ride you frontwards or backwards?” “Did you watch the game last Sunday?” and even the classic, “Have you done anal? With any girl?”

Discomfort is evident each time his face twitches; you could only imagine the topic of conversation at hand, and the subtle glances he makes in your direction only fuels the uneasiness that settles in your stomach. He’d rather be stuck in that than to stand here and listen to you turn down what he confesses every time, claiming he’s lying and nothing more or less. 

Then that’s when you spot Namjoon tug Seungcheol to the side.

Namjoon seems calm, despite the furrow in Seungcheol’s brow that makes it wrinkle in the spot between in a way you found so cute, but the volume of the words that come out their mouths remain low. You can’t hear anything they say nor decipher the motions of their lips, only their gestures toward each other. Quite frankly, it was the opposite of their previous exchanges. Cool, still slightly agitated, but remaining chill enough that a fight wouldn’t break out.

Even after a refreshing shower, underneath the covers with your back resting against the frame of the bed, that feeling in your gut doesn’t go away.

He hasn’t been back to the room yet. Ever since he came back for a bit to grab a couple of his belongings for a shower, you grow concerned and wonder if he’s going to stay here with you. Was he that mad? Did Namjoon say something? Was it worth bringing up the conversation again? Did he decide to sleep in the living room instead of in this room with you?

Maybe you should go check in on him.

Yeah. Sure, you might not know where you actually stand and if he’s still upset, but you should still check on him. He’s still your fake boyfriend after all.

Right?

Right.

You should, because what kind of fake girlfriend would you be if you just let your fake boyfriend sleep on the couch… right? Just fake. Not real—fake. Right. Fake. 

Maybe you wished it wasn’t fake.

Just as you’re about to toss the blanket off your leg, the door swings open.

You swallow.

He stands there, shirtless, with a towel slung over his shoulders as he ruffles it against his hair to get it dry. Why is he shirtless? Just… walking around the house with no shirt on, grey sweatpants hung low enough you could steal a glimpse of his hip bones. Fuck. Fuck! 

He sniffles and why your eyes trail down to his abs flexing instead isn’t something you could explain, then when he turns around to lock the knob, it’s almost like a turn on because your pussy clenches around nothing at the thought of something more based off the action.

But no. No. No. You asked for nothing more and you get nothing more.

“Hi,” you speak up, voice hoarse for some reason before clearing your throat and reiterating the greeting once more. “H-Hey.”

Why are you stuttering?

He only looks at you for a brief second before grabbing the pillow on the bed and throwing it onto the floor with a spare blanket. “Hey, baby.”

Baby. He used that pet name on you again. There’s a sense of relief that fans you, and suddenly you feel like everything is okay again, in spite of the fact that he’s shuffling to lay on the floor beside the bed after he switches off the lights.

“Are you still mad?”

“No, love.”

But his back is turned to you. 

“You’re mad.”

“I’m not, love. I’m just tired—the guys drained me out. Can’t be talking about stocks, work, and beers all the time. I don’t necessarily got a corporate job to be talking about.”

You’re silent.

He doesn’t say much, and his even breathing isn’t elongated enough to be asleep. 

What do you do? You can’t sleep like this. The regret in what you said earlier is gnawing at your insides, and you desperately have this urge to resolve this whole situation or else you’d be staring at the ceiling in the dark.

You gulp. Pushing down all the anxiousness that formulate in your throat, you inhale a deep breath. “Seungcheol?”

“Hmm?”

“Can you come sleep with me?”

← last chapter | next chapter →

[betelgeusing]

righteous gemstones finale thoughts roundup spoilers galore

Peter Montgomery being the shortest person in his family was an inspired choice, Steve Zahn in his villain era hell yeah (he was also so good in George and Tammy recently)

Always surprised by how much genuine love and tenderness Jesse seems to have for his wife and children, as clumsily as he expresses it

But for real Jesse finally pulling ahead of Simkins by taking responsibility and going to get his family members safe (and trusting Gideon to help him do more than he could alone) was a great end to his character arc this season

(He appears to have been that way since he was a teenager?? cute. Jesse for sleeper favorite of the season honestly)

(Speaking of teen Jesse, the interlude episodes really show how badly Eli and Aimee Leigh failed their children. Giggling about how Judy's therapist would have to deal with her in the future instead of TRYING TO HELP IN THE PRESENT, for example. they are wonderful characters to watch, and it's nice that Eli is bonding with Gideon now, but they fully neglected raising their children in favor of their careers and it's WILD that Eli acts baffled that his kids as adults are a fucking mess)

Plague of locusts WILD choice though. Like OK we'll just accept that it happened I guess

Stephen Dorff was underused. Shea Whigham too but his character seemed like more of a cameo to begin with. Dorff could have been the primary villain instead of just popping in early and then late. Oh well, I guess they did the rival megachurch pastor last season so it would have felt too repetitive

I would love to see more characters like May May everywhere. She was so well written and performed

Comparisons to Succession are valid and idk maybe it seems like the Gemstones get off too lightly, but I think the core sweetness to the show makes it what it is and distinguishes it. You know the Roys are always going to end up at odds; you know the Gemstones are always going to end up united. Ofc they're equally shitty/crooked people to everyone not part of their families, but then, they're different shows with very different tones

I would be lying if I said I wouldn't watch Baby Billy's Bible Bonkers. Tiffany tearing it UP on the piano

also the way Baby Billy is with Chuck and Karl is the most precise depiction of how it feels when you have to watch your maternal and paternal extended family members interact with each other I've ever seen

(Bisexual Baby Billy confirmed?? Though I'm not sure anyone was asking for it)

BJ Judy matching outfits FOREVER

Keefe and Kelvin beat the queerbaiting allegations I HAD FAITH . they are GLOWING in the last episode. (Keefe's distaste for Taryn from EPISODE ONE is also hysterical. Jealousssssss)

Keefe's outfits are the best in the show sorry BJ sorry Judy you guys ran a tough campaign but it's true

The variations on the word "daddy" in the last few episodes are killer. Specifically Jesse's almost-whispered "datty" and the way the Gemstone siblings tell Baby Billy "you are NOT my daddy, boy"

"Daddy-boy" making MULTIPLE appearances as a disrespectful reference to Eli lmfao (and Jesse calling him "Elijah" for the 5 minutes he was pissed at him)(also Jesse being mad at Chuck for all of an hour before forgiving him. He's simply not built for grudges)

Aimee Leigh final shot shmaltzy? Maybe but I will take every excuse to see Jennifer Nettles in the role again <3

[stormblessed95]

Hi, sorry if it's late, but can I ask for your persoal top favorite queer books and (maybe) your top fav fanfiction (from any fandom but your all time fav)? Thanks so much.....

Also why do you think mlm or wlw romance is more interesting than mlw (het) romance?

Feel free if you want to ignore the last ask, thanks for your blog....

Why do I personally enjoy gay romances to het ones? Preference and taste probably. I also tend to enjoy the angst, longing, tropes, passion, etc in the way its written more than I do in the ways those things are written between a straight couple. And that's not to say I don't enjoy straight romances either! I have plently of het ships I love too, and a few good romances that aren't gay 😂 I just have a preference, and that's okay! As for recommendations!! I have a LOTS! If you want to tell me about what YOU like to read, I can give even better recs. But for in general, some of my favorites...

I have posts about QUITE A FEW here already that you can check out (please do)!:

^ you'll find queer characters in most of the lists of recs honestly at least somewhere. BUT I do have posts specific for Sapphic, Achillian and Ace recs there. So start there!

I'll also throw in that I'm recently quite obsessed with fantasy Sapphics with swords in my books lately! So books like "The Jasmine Throne." "This is How You Lose The Time War." "Priory of the Orange Tree." "Gideon the Ninth." "Girls of Paper and Fire" and "Legends and Lattes."

Come back for me if you want more!

And some of my favorite fics (of various fandoms! Exciting!) In no particular order, I'll link a few for you!

That Isn't Nothing by Taekookschanbaek

(I KNOW OKAY, in my defense I didn't realize the authors name until AFTER I read and loved the fic lmfao but it IS SO good, I promise lol)

Fandom: All For The Game

Ship: Andrew x Neil

Summary: "A look into the lives of pro exy players Andrew Minyard and Neil Josten. The world says they hate each other, but when Andrew gets transferred to Neil's team, their teammates begin seeing something else between them."

In Which Neil is a PR Nightmare by CoverYourEyes

Fandom: All For The Game

Ship: Andrew x Neil

Summary: "Eve was not the best person in the world. Sometimes she didn’t hold the elevator open when she saw people rushing to catch it from the other side of the lobby. Cutting the line at Starbucks was a semi-regular action. But Eve did not deserve to be Neil fucking Josten's publicist.

**********

Or, the one where Neil does what he wants, picks fights with reporters, discovers Twitter, breaks the internet, and really shouldn't be allowed out of his house. Andrew does nothing to discourage him."

The Men In Apartment 22B by jjmash

Fandom: All For The Game

Ship: Andrew x Neil

Summary: "Andrew and Neil's new neighbors are extremely confused about the two mysterious men in 22B. Are they dating? Are they in the mafia? Are they rival assassins who've fallen in love? As always, the truth is stranger than fiction."

Blame It On My Youth by youreyestheyglow

(Locked fic, you need an account. This fic is THICK but it's by far one of the best Andriel fics I've ever read or just in general. SO GOOD and so emotional and so sweet and so cute)

Fandom: All For The Game

Ship: Andrew x Neil

Summary: "10 years after the end of The King's Men, Andrew and Neil have decided to foster a kid. They have low expectations for themselves--they're not exactly ideal parenting material--but at the very least, the kid will be safe with them. But neither Andrew nor Neil do temporary very well.

Full disclosure: highly character-driven, minimally plot-driven."

(Wangxian and MDZS IS my newest hyperfixation and I love the juniors dynamics fics so much lol)

The One-Body Problem by metisket

Fandom: MDZS

Ship: Wei Ying x Lan Zhan

Summary: "The good news is that Lan Jingyi has found a mentor, friend, and constant companion through the difficulties in life.

The bad news is that that’s because he’s been accidentally possessed by the Yiling Patriarch."

Operation Old Men by Chiharu

Fandom: MDZS

Ship: Wei Ying x Lan Zhan

Summary: "An ill-fated parent teacher conference reunites Jin Ling's wayward uncle with Sizhui's father. AKA: A matchmaking disaster as told by Jin Ling, Sizhui, and Jingyi."

And Time Is But A Paper Moon by Sami

Fandom: MDZS

Ship: Wei Ying x Lan Zhan

Summary: ""Zewu-Jun. You once told me about a house surrounded by gentians, where you visited once a month, and how Lan Zhan still waited there, even when the door no longer opened."

Xichen feels light-headed. He feels shocked, and angry. He has never told anyone such a thing, but Lan Zhan is giving Xichen a look of utter betrayal.

"You told him?" Lan Zhan whispers. "When?"

Wei Wuxian takes Lan Zhan's hand. "About twenty years from now."

*******

Wei Wuxian starts again from the beginning."

(the first time) he kissed a boy by buzzcut__season

Fandom: Sk8 The Infinity

Ship: Langa x Reki

Summary: "Reki is insecure about his lack of kissing experience. Langa just wants to help him feel like he's good enough, even if teaching Reki to kiss means breaking his own heart."

The Gambler by MooeyDooey

Fandom: Sk8 The Infinity

Ship: Joe x Cherry

Summary: "Joe and Cherry run into a problem. Conspiracy theories have started to surface in some fan forums of "S" that the two of them are secretly dating one another.

Both of them agree that the idea is absurd, but can't agree on which one of them would be the better boyfriend if they actually were dating. So they decide to have a competition, to see who can be the better romantic partner when pitted up against one another."

The One Where Nico Has 30 Boyfriends by a_million_stars

Fandom: PJO

Ship: Will x Nico

Summary: "“Seriously? Me and Lester?” Nico looked ready to kill him. “If you keep speaking to me I think I’m going to throw up.”

Or, a new friend from college desperately tries to figure out who Nico's secret boyfriend is. He messes up. A lot. If only Nico didn't have so many weirdly close friends from high school."

Burgundy (not Maroon) by Eggplant_Crusader

Fandom: Wednesday

Ship: Wednesday x Enid

Summary: "They're driving each other insane. It can't last. One of these days, one of them will surely kill the other. Enid wants to avoid that. Wednesday can't wait."

Like Everything Glows by Annie_Vi

(One of the only people I'll read RPS fics from. Everything this woman writes is gold, this is my favorite though, and the first i read of hers)

Fandom: BTS

Ship: Jimin x Jungkook

Summary: "Jeon Jeongguk watches the sun rise and set on the water every day without wondering what may lie far beneath the surface. One nighttime walk along the beach upheaves his entire life, sending his human morals into a tailspin as he questions what his beliefs really are."

(I need more shows with good wlw ships that have good fics too!! If anyone has any good recs, send them my way!! Also there are so many good fics I've read that i realized i never bookmarked and now i cant remember what they are. Lesson learned. Bookmark everything! Thanks for the ask!!)

[canonically47]

thoughts on every ridonculous race duo including don at the beginning because i just finished watching it for the first time. continued in reblogs

don is such a fun host! he doesn't want anyone to get hurt, and doesn't push anything 'for the ratings'. and even so, he manages to have a lot of funny, witty moments. of course, chris is still my favorite host, but don definitely cuts it close!... especially because, let's be real, we all forgot anyone else in the universe. (don't come for me blaineley fans she's fine I SAID DON'T COME FOR ME STAY BACK PLEASE I HAVE A FAMILY)

the LARPers. definitely some... interesting characters. they're the prime example of total drama's flat and boring personalities, most of which were distributed in pahkitew island. i'm kinda mad that, of all those horribly mid and boring characters, we got the most mid and boring one back. hell i'd have preferred dave there, he'd had given us some substance to the story. i don't even remember the girl's name and i don't wanna google it. forgettable, but definitely annoying for as long as they were on screen.

the tennis rivals. good, but overhyped i think. at least, i've seen a lot of people talk about them and ship them, especially since their cameo in the reboot. i for sure thought they'd last longer because of that. i really liked their banter but they don't come close to my favorites. i will not be calling any of their agents. sorry :(

the geniuses. yeah they definitely existed! i mean their characters were fine and i really don't have anything against them, plus their concept is kinda fun. but i absolutely despise courtney's character and hearing her voice come out of another contestant's mouth made me hate her immediately. I STILL KINDA LIKE HER... like, her character design is fun... i just don't care for them that much

the vegans. they look sooo pretty and.. that is the sole reason i put them down as 'i vibe with'. i really don't care for them. i don't even know their names lmfao

the fashion bloggers. sooo fun whenever they were on-screen. unfortunately this show is so predictable and i can tell when a character's arc comes to an end and they're going home. i don't wish they stayed longer tbh? i like them but i think they've had their time. the wlw/mlm solidarity ever next to the ice dancers but we're getting to them. anyways, solid duo!

mom and daughter. ugh. fuck you

the adversity twins. i don't want to sound like a copypasta so i'll keep it short but GODDD THEY WERE SOOO ANNOYING. does NOBODY else feel this way?? i swear before i watched RR i only saw good things about them. HOW? LITERALLY HOW??? they are so fucking annoying and all they do when they're on screen is whine. "ooh mickey is allergic to breathing :((" "actually jay has a water allergy :((" AND THEN THEY HAVE THIS OP SUPERPOWER WHAT THE FUCK IS TEMPERATURE DYSLEXIA THAT DOESN'T EVEN EXIST ahem. excuse me. getting too worked up over thE WORST DUO. SHUT THE FUCK UP let's move on sorry i'll control myself

the step-brothers. idk about you guys but they are really close to being my favorite duo. just... their entire gimmick is so good. the build-up to finding out they're so similar... ough the bros ever. i was so sad when they got eliminated :( they were so funny AND fun. lorenzo is higher than chet because i like his character design more. tbh they're kinda the same person to me? but this is a mistake i made before watching RR, thinking every duo is the same person. which they're not, i quickly learned. at least not most of them. but yeah these two were very fun, they bounced off each other very well. i really liked them. they should've gone further methinks.

[seedlessmuffins]

aren’t you a new football fan? celebrating like you’ve won the fucking world cup after one arsenal win lmfao. i’m not a city fan but don’t get used to assna wins when you lot lose the league to city again. embarrassing behaviour

hi anon! let's clear the air, yeah?

first of all, yes! i am a new football fan, i just started watching seriously after the world cup, and i am also a new arsenal fan. however, i still care very deeply about the sport and my team's successes in said sport! that is what being a fan is all about <3 just because i didn't grow up watching european football doesn't mean that i have less of a right to enjoy it then you do! also, it is the most popular sport in the world with billions and billions of fans globally, and out of the entire sport, the english premier league is the most viewed league in the world. of football, but also of any sport. so you can't really gatekeep it, sorry!

second of all, i'm aware that this was only a regular matchweek, not the world cup. but there are two important caveats to that those being:

who we were playing

and

the fashion in which we won

for who we were playing, it's not a secret that outside of the spurs and the north london derby, manchester united is one of arsenal's biggest rivals and has been since the start of the premier league when they were competing against each other for titles and trophies. i won't go into premier league history with you, i am just a new fan who knows nothing after all, but you should know that beating a rival is always exciting, especially when you are competing against them for points and jockeying for the title to compete with man city. every win is important, and winning is better when it is against a historical rival team.

for the fashion in which we won, it was a close game until the very end. rashford scoring in the 27th minute, and odegaard answering back 35 seconds later. the teams were trading chances and possession, there were good chances and var calls that went either way, it was a close game where the teams were fighting hard. and then, in the 95th minute, rice scores an absolute screamer and it was truly scenes at the emirates. gabi jesus caps it off with a 101st minute beaut, and arsenal win the game. winning in the last 3 minutes of regulation time, with a bonus goal over 100 minutes into the game is exciting! it was thrilling to watch, and seeing a team that i support win that emphatically in that dramatic of a manner was so much fun. its an exciting thing to watch and its ok to be excited when there's a win like that!

it also isn't just one win, this has just been our best win this season (imo)! we have only played four games, and we have won three and drawn one. so that is three wins actually, i am just celebrating this one the most, again, because of who we won against, how we won, and how we played to secure the win.

if the bit about "not getting used to arsenal wins" (i don't think you can call them assna when they came second in the premier league last season, and this season they haven't lost and they're in the champions league, right? but what do i know i'm just a new footy fan <3) is about the post where i said i forgot how good it feels to watch my team win, i don't think you understand what i have been through in the past 12 years as a sports fan. my hockey team has been on a losing streak almost this whole time, and we have been one of the flops of the league for awhile. just take a look at these gorgeous statistics from my favourite hockey team (that i have been a fan of since i was two, thank you very much)

do you want to talk losing? i know about losing. i know about losing for a long time, in an embarrassing manner. if you want more examples from football, from january to april 2023 i watched psg play every week. that was embarrassing losing in football for real. i might be new to football but i'm not new to sports, and i have to be perfectly honest: coming second is not losing. and what happened today wasn't a loss at all! in fact, it was the opposite! it was a win!

idk about losing the league to manchester city, it seems to me that arsenal has a good system with talented players that can ball out. we will see what comes, as the season is long and there are many other competitions for arsenal to compete in, but i have faith in the gunners and i believe that they can win! (and ill let you in on a little secret: that's what being a fan is all about <3)

i'm not sure if the embarrassing behaviour at the end is for my behaviour or arsenal's behaviour, however i am not being embarrassing, i am just being a fan, and arsenal certainly wasn't embarrassing with their performance today. idk what you're seeing, but bestie i think you might be blind <3

thanks for coming into my inbox anon, hope this cleared everything up for you! next time, let's let people enjoy things yeah? i try my best to be positive on here, i'm hardly ever a hater and i like to spread joy. why don't you take some of that energy alright? alright. hope you enjoyed your stay <3

ps: arsenal definitely are winning the world cup :)

[apphiarothowrites]

Carry my burdens

(I seem to really enjoy the discovery of Marco as a person from the perspective of other people lmfao) (trigger warning gore)

The first time Ace remembers feeling his soulmate's pain is just after Garp's dumped him with the bandits. It blooms over his cheekbone, feeling like a crack and a shift inside his face, and he flinches hard. He rubs the spot, tears welling up, and then it's gone under a flash of warmth like a rag that was dipped in hot water dragged over the spot.

Dadan huffs and tells him that his soulmate probably got slapped. Ace isn't so sure. Years later, when some adult who hates Roger breaks his cheekbone, he remembers that moment and knows suddenly it wasn't a slap. But it makes him wonder why it disappeared so quickly.

It happens the same way every time. Sometimes sharp, sometimes dull; always hard and fast and bone-breaking, and enough to make Ace flinch and want to cry or scream with it. Ace's tolerance for his own pain grows, but even his own wounds are nothing in comparison to the stuff his soulmate experiences. His only consolation is that his soulmate's pain never lasts longer than a few seconds or a minute at most. Sabo and Luffy timed him, once, when he felt something pierce his chest that sent him to the ground in a hysterical fit. Like a hot lance through his ribs and heart and out his back, he screamed for a solid 45 seconds before it disappeared, once again, under a rush of warmth.

He thought, for a time, that he might hate his soulmate. While it didn't last long, it was always intense and horrifyingly hard. Why was it always like this? What were they doing that they were hurt in such terrible ways? How did they make it go away so quickly?

He thought he'd never have an answer until Whitebeard. Until after he took the mark. Until his first real fight on Pops' crew.

A rival crew from the North Blue challenging for territory. A man with a shotgun, blunt and mean looking. Ace had been only a few feet away and the resulting spray of horrible buckshot went painlessly through his fire.

It did not painlessly pass through Marco. Half of Marco's skull disappeared in a messy riot of giblets, strings of flesh and bits of bone bouncing off the deck. Marco's shoulder and arm and torso were instantly shredded like they'd been fed into a grinder. Pain, so similar and yet unlike anything he'd experienced before, exploded over Ace's side, arm, shoulder, and face.

His scream stopped everything dead in it's tracks. He didn't know he'd collapsed until the pain stopped-the warmth that always came gentling it away. When he could open his eyes again, Marco was a vision of blue wings and a golden beak bathed in red. The man with the shotgun was in pieces and somewhere in the world that man's soulmate learned what happens to people when their soulmate dies.

When the fighting was over, nobody believed him when he insisted he was fine. That was he felt wasn't his own pain, it was fine, he was fire anyway nobody was going to be able to hurt him while he was on the ground.

Marco locked them into his office, looking haunted and tired in a way Ace had never seen him before. He sagged into his chair, rubbed his hands over his face, and said

"I'm sorry-yoi. I never meant to do any of this to you."

[harryswinks]

“it’s his job not to be soft” is crazy when a) what in the toxic masculinity, b) he was yelling at them in the second half, and c) he was brimming with anger in the post match interview saying it was unacceptable … it’s honestly a bit sickening time and time again to see all these micro aggressions against sonny. especially ppl who compare him with kane like why is kane shown so much grace for his bad games and sonny is not lmfao despite being instrumental in possibly our greatest achievement since 2008 (cl run). think we all know why really

like it's fine to say 'cor sonny was shit today' because he was, and it's fine to say if he's on a bad run of form too such as times like last season (not his fault) but this person was also questioning his commitment to club and the team... im sorry but you just cannot ask for more from a player. he's one of the committed players to the club i've ever seen, and even if kane had stayed there was no other candidate for the captaincy in my opinion. it HAD to be sonny. i have never once looked at him and thought he was lacking any effort, not even last season when there was a few players who i wasn't sure were quite putting their all in (understandable, they were playing under conte after all)

and yeah so what if sonny isn't a shouty person? players are allowed to have a 'softer' personalty. we know sonny has such a good relationship with his teams mates on and off the pitch that they'll all run through a brick wall for him. he's the bridge between all the players and language etc... people were also a bit like this with hugo as if he wasnt vocal on the pitch and would be angry when needed in interviews like sonny - people seemed under the impression he never fucking spoke lmao. there's also been some talk around this in how people talk about odegaard and his captaincy too... just because a player doesn't go around CONSTANTLY shouting a la henderson or roy fucking keane like its still the 90s doesn't mean they're not a good leader for being 'soft' it just means they have a different leadership style and personality and there's nothing wrong with that. there's definitely some racism when it comes to people thinking sonny's soft, imo. (it's also funny when you consider that rival fans think that sonny is some horrible dirty player who goes around trying to purposefully injure players because of a spell where he was petulant and got 2 reds and then his foul that lead to aurier breaking gomes' ankle... 2 completely differently views of him lmao)

look, i'll always love kane for all the goals but yeah, he really could do no wrong in a lot of spurs fans eyes. even when he went on strike. like COME ON, no other player would have been forgiven so quickly after that, and no other player wouldnt have it held against them. going back to the commitment thing, sonny would NEVER EVER pull a stunt like that. it's really annoying that people don't see that sonny is just as - if not more- committed to us than harry was. he could have pushed for a move every summer for the past 5 years and hasn't. sonny ALWAYS stepped up in kane's absence (as seen in the champions league that year). can't even say kane was afforded extra grace because he's an academy lad when you look at how our fans have treated other academy players over the years so what does that leave... i don't think people quite realise they're doing it, tbh (same with the 'soft' comments)

[kohakhearts]

ok i was sleep deprived tweeting about this but i got at least 6 hours of sleep last night so im ready to approach this with a degree of normalness. anyway remember when i said i was going to start shipping bloombolt ironically. well lets just say ive been thinking about things they have in common LMFAO but you’re likely unsurprised this is actually my way of saying Here’s How ShigeGou Can Still Win-

ANYWAY THE POINT BEING. goh? terrible friend. god he sucks. actually, chloe doesn’t even consider him a friend, at least not to his face (probably because he thinks friends are a hinderance to his goals and he’s got a lot of problems that make him think he doesn’t need friends he just needs to be the Bestest Coolest Guy Ever Who Knows Everything About Pokemon). in their debut episode they are 6 years old and she introduces him as someone who “hangs around my dad’s lab a lot” (possibly could be “comes to play at my dad’s lab a lot,” which isn’t REALLY much better - still holds the implication that he comes to play with her dad’s pokemon or his cool pokemon-related technology rather than her). she says to professor oak she invited him to pokemon camp simply because he’s always at her dad’s lab and she knew he’d like it.

ok now hear me out here. aside from the fact that she doesn’t EVER call herself goh’s friend, there is zero indication that chloe dislikes goh. actually, she tries pretty hard for him! she clearly likes him, or at least feels bad for him because she can tell he’s lonely (i theorize this is because he’s just like her. that her father’s status as what professor oak himself in this same scene calls A GENIUS has resulted in her feeling somewhat isolated. it’s probably in that “adults always want to talk about how great my dad is and the other kids pick up on it and think i’m Weird And Annoying because all our teachers and their parents seem to think i’m Special” way). it seems that her refusal to acknowledge that they Are friends stems more from the fact that she is aware - perhaps from experience - that attempting to establish that they Are friends will only make him push back, and maybe push her away. she is playing a game with rules that he decided on because his Complex is so ingrained in him even at 6 years old that he tells her to her face I Don’t Need Friends >:(

if this is sounding at all familiar, perhaps you’ve heard my pallet childhood friends spiel. if not, not to worry, for i wrote all about it here. the tl;dr here however is that whether or not ash and gary being childhood friends who go like see movies together or whatever is a late-series addition, there’s actually no good reason to think they DON’T have some kind of established relationship prior to the season one pilot. actually, it seems more as though gary has made the decision for the both of them that it’s time to stop being kids and start being serious - on the day they get their first pokemon, he declares ash his rival and begins calling him satoshi-kun in order to establish that we are not friends, you don’t take this seriously and so i won’t take you seriously until you show me you’re worth being my rival.

you could argue ash isn’t as understanding as chloe, so rather than you know, bringing him his homework and whatnot, he just gets pissed off. HOWEVER, they actually both do the same thing: reach out, constantly, and get rejected over and over. in jn002 goh stands chloe up and then when he finally responds to her messages all he says is essentially “i’m doing something more important than that, sorry” and her reaction is “he always does this.” likewise, ash takes gary’s rival declaration seriously! every time he sees the guy, he wants to battle, to prove himself to him (that he’s worthy, that he’s better than gary thinks, etc etc). for a good 200 or so episodes, every time gary shows up, all he does is walk away from ash. barring that, making fun of him for being no good at battling, yet never actually engaging him in a battle to prove it. the first time gary actually tries to battle him is after they’ve both received eight (uh. or ten) gym badges. the first time they actually battle is way after that. and then he wins and continues to just walk away again, until pretty close to the end of the johto arc (though there’s a little more respect there).

anyway the parallel is pretty obvious. at least to me. there's something deeply wrong with them both <3 which is why then in the project mew arc, who is the one telling goh that he has to be good at teamwork? that he has to learn to cooperate with people in order to achieve his goals? obviously ash is the one who taught goh about The Meaning Of FriendshipTM, but gary occupies a unique position of actually understanding why this is a skill he needs to work on, because it's something he had to learn the hard way too.

on the other hand! ash and chloe have their own fun solidarity: world's shittiest, most emotionally repressed childhood best friend who is allergic to the word friend to begin with

[draculagerard]

u asked for it so i am HERE to tell u about the netflix tv show never have i ever......except im not going to explain Everything super concisely bc i already have a hard enough time trying 2 explain the complexities of devi vishwakumar when my brain is Actually working but rn i am running on three hours of sleep, an energy drink that partially sprayed out of my nose, and some sour punch straws but i am going to do my best to like. idk explain it. apologies in advance bc this got so long im SO sorry. ANYWAY. never have i ever. its about a first-generation indian american girl named devi and she is like. well. not cool. her n her friends are called the "UN" which they thought meant united nations bc they're all woc but no it means unfuckable nerds. and the person who coined the term unfuckable nerds? one ben gross, aka devi's longstanding academic rival. do u see where this is going yet? great. wonderful. devi spends most of season 1 chasing after this jock paxton (who. we do love. just not with devi.) and imploding all of her personal relationships in an attempt to Not Feel the grief of her father dying. at one point she even tells her mom that she wishes her mom died instead of her dad (ouch, but also, been there). atp devi's friends, the other members of the UN, are taking a "friend break" bc she was. well kind of a bitch. so she moves in w ben (rival) for like a week and then he drives her, unlicensed, to where her mom is spreading her dads ashes and then she goes back up to the car and they go "you stayed" "yeah i just wanrted to make sure you were okay" and then KISS. KISS!!!!!!! but then paxton (jock) also likes her so she dates BOTH of them and then implodes on her and they both break up with her. and then she accidentally spreads a rumor around the school about ben's new girlfriend having an eating disorder which ends up being true. and then paxton (jock) dates her again. and then they break up after like 3 months and ben's new girlfriend (aneesa) also breaks up w ben same day and then ben and devi are like. besties for a bit. devi dates a new guy des who honestly should probably be in a relationship with his own mom instead and then he dumps her bc of his mom and THEN. after all of this. ben jokingly gives devi a "one free boink" card. (was it really a joke ben was it i dont think so!!!!) and. at paxton's graduation he sort of mentions devi but not by name and the narrator (which, i should mention the narrator for devi's inner monologue is american tennis player john mcenroe) says she doesnt get stomach knots!!! but then she and ben share an like an intimate moment in the hall and mcenroe says "there's the stomach knots" like!!!!! and THEN later that night!!!!! she goes to ben's house!!!!!!1 and redeems the one free boink card CAN YOU BELIEVE IT!!!!!!!! and thats where season 3 ends....

season 4 comes out in THREE DAYS and weve gotten SOOOO many spoilers for the first two episodes which (if anyone who watches never have i ever is still reading this and doesnt want spoilers please sotp reading) we find out that ben and devi DID boink and that they both thought iut was like?? bad foir the other person??? and ben just didnt know what to say so he asked if she needed him to call an uber like ben WHAT. as rae @ice-sculptures put it "can you believe that ben gross not knowing what to say after fucking led to the whole spiral of miscommunication lmfao" like they just DONT TALK devi tries to ask if he wanted to get coffee and he says NO because a basketball player at the gym told ben that devi wasnt serious about him because she put a period in the text or somethjing?? so instead he goes and dates this girl from art class margot and devi sees ben with her on the first day of school and gets. well upset. and then someone spray paints "STUPID BITCH" on devi's car and of course she thinks its margot!!!! (but shhhh it wasnt....it was actually this kid ethan....more on him later) and then like other stff happens im not super clear about that but basically at some point ben tells devi that margot doesnt want ben talking to devi anymore :( i dont rlly know much else past that i think thats where s4e2 ends??? but we do know that devi ends up DATING that ethan kid at some point but. sooo many things point to ben/devi endgame esp bc her other main love interest (paxton, the jock) is now STAFF at their high school so like?? i dont think they're going that route but im just. dsjfkhjsad SO EXCITED except i cannot watch s4 the day it comes out bc i will be seeing waterparks which. im so excitred for but also WHYYY do they have to be on the same day

i feel like i didnt explain this very well and left out a lot of like pivotal ben/devi moments but im sitting here jus.t typing and not rereading any of this im. So sorry that this is as long as it is jkhsddfsd thank u for reading this and. if u didnt read it i dont blame u szdkjhdfsakd

WOW OKAY HOLY FUCK A LOT GOING ON THERE HUH????? HELLO.

Okay okay key notes:

I already like Devi and I haven't even watched the show.

WHAT THE FUCK IS BEN DOING HELLOOOO. WHAT IS WRONG WITH HIM DSFJJFD

by boink im assuming it means fuck right. cause like i've never euphemism in my life

THEY END S3 LIKE THAT ?? FWERLJW

oh LORD devi's complex relationship with her mom okay i hear it

bro the miscommunication sounds SOOO bad... like they cannot communicate properly even once huh 😭

devi ends up dating WHO now???? first the guy who gave them the name un and then the stupid bitch dude?? HELP....

IT COMES OUT IN 3 DAYS??? oh shit good luck??!!

OMG youre gonna go to a Waterparks show????? have fun holy shit

anyways are you kidding ofc i read the whole thing i NEED media rants rn

[steffigraf]

some challengers thoughts (and major spoilers) under the cut 🎾

first things first: these bitches are Deranged. none of them will be seeing heaven. and i fucking love them lmfao give me that toxic mess !

also i am aware that this is supposed to be a drama but considering i am the master of finding the most irrelevant things hilarious, i was silent laughing throughout most of it lmao. good thing nobody was anywhere near me. but anyway moving on

at the start when tashi chooses the challenger that art will play, i was lmfao-ing at how she was on the atp wta app. like im sorryyyyy but that app is just,,, well. yeah. yall know.

prior to watching btw i had actually read a couple of spoilers & thought dumps on this movie BUT LIKE. NONE OF YALL MENTIONED THE CHILD. THE FUCK. those three fuckers were doing their toxic little mating dance while There Was A Child. brought a new level of fucked up to what they were doing that i truly didn’t expect. hope that kid gets therapy in the future

anyway art at the challenger should’ve had more crazy fans. like as a six time gs champ (who presumably didnt rly have consistent rivals like the big three lmao) he was literally a tennis Star. where are the crazy posters. cut outs of his face. smh he needs more groupies

patrick’s serve kinda reminds me of siniakova’s. anyway i don’t like it smdhdkdjks sorry siniakova but it bothers me how the motion gets cut up instead of being one fluid thing along with the toss. thats kinda just a me thing tho lmao

so the part at the party where those losers just kept awkwardly coming up to tashi? embarrassing tbh. secondhand shame well and truly alive in me

patrick has defo been into art the whole time btw like cmon. when tashi asked if they were a thing and art shot it down asap but patrick hesitated? ohhhh boy

tashi, on the other hand, is fascinating for me cause like. does she really like either of these men? no clue. it seems like she only does when she gets Both of them. which you know what valid i support her and her wrongs etc etc

in the doubles match when they celebrated on top of each other, i think a bunch of ppl in the theater were going all 👀 which i mean sure it’s valid in this case but uh. i was sitting there like that guy at the corner of the party meme thinking “they don’t know tennis players are just Like That actually” (many sports in general actually. the things footy boys do the pitch…… but i digress. still, it was weird to realize that most people are unaware of the homoeroticism of sport. wild!)

emotionally speaking, the thing that hit me the hardest was actually when the tv in the bg started talking abt how that mueller girl won wimby and was basically unstoppable. like the callback is insane and just OUCH it hurt so much because it was so Real imo? like. that is very much a scenario that can and does happen in tennis, and sport in general. there are always the random players who get injured or flop or just randomly retire, and it leaves us wondering: if they had still been at the top of their game, would the face of the sport have changed? so i empathized with tashi’s pain as she saw someone she had considered Below Her now rise to glory that tashi herself would never know. but, as we all know, if if if doesn’t exist. and that’s the thing that pained me the most.

random tinder lady was ridiculous sorry but like patrick literally just told her he was a total loser in tennis and then left her table to talk to another girl. i think she shouldve slapped him the fuck away instead of making out with him lmfao. like girl he is not hot enough for you to ignore the bullcrap. has he even showered. come on.

when tashi and patrick talked tho and she got mad at him for blowing smoke in her face? so real. i approve. i hate secondhand smoke soooo much bleh

that scene where art says he wants to retire and just flops his head on tashi’s lap and asks her to hold him????? only scene that made me feel actual Yearning. like damn get me a babygirl man like that. or let me be someone’s babygirl like that. like platonically or whatever idc just give me those soft touches i want that sensory experience

when tashi asked patrick to throw the match and patrick was like “how could you do this to him?” and basically said that asking that was Worse than her physically cheating on art. loved that shit. i was like damnnnnnnn that’s the all encompassing emotional nature of devoting your life to tennis babey!

in general actually a lot of their lines were soooo snappy and shit and like. i enjoyed that

but honestly my suspension of disbelief was kinda shattered a bit in the arguing in the car scene cause like. i was so fucking stressed. they were driving fast in the middle of a fucking storm at midnight and neither had a seatbelt i think and i swear there was a point where patrick looked at tashi for like five whole seconds while driving. LIKE PLEASE. god. can’t you guys be toxic bitches while obeying traffic rules? 😔

anyway. the camera shots from the floor during the match itself oh my GOD im obsessed. especially during the serve. wish i could gif those. god. yeah. yeahhhhh

speaking of the match though. idk some stuff with the scoring graphic felt off? i got a bit confused at some point. might be imagining it tho lmao

ball perspective was so fucking funny tho. i mean it worked i think but i kept thinking like imagine if we had ballcam with the tour big hitters. poor balls. they go thru so much. may they rest in peace.

when art just fell onto patrick at the end smash im sorry ik that was supposed to be a climax and shit but it was SO fucking funny

and finally: shoutout to art’s dead grandma. she moved the plot in ways she never even knew. legend 🙌🪦🕊️

so yeah i had a Lot of fun! though i truly have NO idea how this movie even looks to people who dont get tennis. or sports in general. must be a hell of a ride lol

(still probably a better intro to tennis than break point)

[mancalledvenus]

ranking the karasuno boys :3

TW: OPINION !! (pls don’t attack me.)

9. asahi azumane

CONTROVERSIAL (so is this entire list) but i just do not really like asahi and i don’t know why. it might be his goatee lmfao, it just makes me uncomfortable i’m so sorry. he’s a total sweetheart and i have NOTHING AGAINST HIM, but i love the other players more.

8. kageyama tobio

i have mixed feelings about kageyama cuz on my first watch i did really like him, but now i could not care less about him. his ranking also might be cuz of how popular he is and me not understanding the hype might have turned into resentment lmao.

7. tsukishima kei

similar situation to kageyama except he actually has me PISSED OFF cuz of how popular he is when he’s SUCH AN ASS. the only reason he’s higher is cuz he’s just a little more fun to watch. honestly you could switch him and tobio on this list and it wouldn’t make a difference. i just don’t care for how rude they are. still fine tho unfortunately :(

6. daichi sawamura

solid character. good captain, good guy, blah blah blah, he’s not that interesting to me. he’s got one of the more boring designs in the show so he never stuck out to me. that lands him around the middle, but he could still hit

5. yamaguchi tadashi

love yamaguchi so much, he’s so cute. hurts to see him standing on the side a lot of the time cuz i just wanna see him get a chance to play :,( he’s adorable and so fucking funny. everyone always forgets how much of a SHIT TALKER he is. he’s so real dude.

4. hinata shoyo

HINATAAA he is the perfect main character for me i absolutely adore him. he’s genuinely hilarious and i cannot get enough of how cute he is. this is the point in the list where it’s obvious what type of characters i like and what i don’t (energetic, funny guys vs. quiet assholes)

3. tanaka ryuunosuke

sooooo fucking funny dude. i could watch an hour of him talking about NOTHING and be entertained. get this man a podcast bro. carries the dub on his back plus he’s FINEEE

2. sugawara koshi

everyone’s first haikyuu crush cuz of how damn charming he is. def the sweet boy every girl has a crush on cuz he’s just so like-able. never met a single person who hates suga cuz he’s just so appealing. my unproblematic king

1. NISHINOYA YUU 👅👅👅

absolutely FELL for this man on my first watch and my love for him NEVERRR went away. he’s my day 1 and my ultimate anime crush dude. i would pick him over anybody. literally the reason i’m a die hard karasuno fan and why i hate the rival characters so much. he is SOOO underrated i can’t. his tags are always dry as hell .

that’s the end! thank you for reading <3 ! who are you’re top 3 haikyuu characters?

[honeybeewhereartthee]

MY DARLING DOLLS 39

Previous || PT7 CH39 || NEXT

PAST:MC

when you open your eyes you stared at golden one who's very close to yours. Her red hair almost covering all your view.

"..." -you.

"good morning, darling ~" the young lady of the tojou estate called out to you sweetly like you two have some special relationship or some sort. Her cheeks blushing with her orbs that's seems to reflect on you so clearly.

You quickly roll away from her like she's some virus.

"I'm not interested in human beings. Go away." You shoo her and she pout being rejected by you again. But her smile returns as she gaze at you with that lovestruck written in her face.

"Do you know your very much trying to imprisoned me cause of that bad taste of yours..." You cannot help but sigh as you rub the chill you felt from how she look at you.

"It's not my daughter fault your very much have your charisma at the max level." The old tojou who's watching the whole thing from the doorway commented.

"Father can I marry MC when I debut to the society (turn 18)?" The young lady went to ask her father the nth time with tearful gaze.

"IM NOT INTERESTED!!" you quickly denied. You have no interested with a kid you watch grow up since day one! Holy crap you cannot even imagine the twitter cancel nation if they know about this. This is so GOTTDAMN terrifying!

Even through you forget what Twitter mean, you cannot help but shake your head so much as you give a look to the head of the household that taken you in since a long time ago.

[ even in this place you have flings...] You heard a voice in your head spokes. You almost thought you went crazy for a moment.

"WTH." You mumble looking around where that voice come from. But making sure that lady is far away from you.

"are you really interested with that doll obsess maniac who don't even age a day?" You heard your being called names by the old tojou and you can't even disagree with him. His speaking facts.

"Ye! Why are you interested with me huh? Nothing good ever happened if you like me!" Your self negativity is at its finest. The old tojou sigh as he heard your WORDS.

The young lady chuckle at your words, amuse how charming you are at the moment and you give her a 'the heck' look.

"your very interesting. And I like you very much." The young lady says confessing to you once again.

"Sorry not interested." You quickly says which made her giggle even more. "Crazy...." You mumble.

"there's many suitors for you my princess." The old tojou commented. "You should choice another one." He added.

"but father! MC stolen my first kiss--"

[ AHAHAHAHHAHA. LMFAO the drama!] The voice in your head laughs as you dodge the hit that was thrown your way by the old tojou. "What?" -old tojou.

"I DONT KNOW WHAT SHE MEAN! I KISS NO ONE BUT MY FLUFFY CREATURES!" You reasoned out as you run away to another corner, away from that crazy dad.

"you seems to forget that I have saved your life." The young lady smiled so charmingly at you. "I have to give you a CPR to revive you... Don't that mean your life is mine now?" She give you a look that reminds you of a snake. "So marry me, ok? To take responsibility as you stole a kiss from this young lady." She added giggling like a villain.

There's laughter's in your head and you felt like your in a tight spot, the fluff around you isn't even helping.

SOMEONE SAVE ME FROM THIS CRAZY LADY!

...

PRESENT: KANAME

"NO WAY! THERES NO WAY THAT HAPPENED!" Kaname screams as he slam his hand at the table. He want to flip the table and flip his hand to his ancestor. "I HAVE SO MANY RIVALS WHYYYYYYYYYYYY!!!" he cries he cannot believe this!

"what drama." Jun sips his drinks as he reads the dairy entre that they found yesterday. "The charm points of mc is so op! Ii Hiyori!" Hiyori chuckle as he cannot help but interested in the current entre. Kaname hugs his knees as he rock himself back and forth in the table, trying to comfort himself about what he just learn.

He cannot believe even his ancestor likes you! He really need a death note! ( He been watching anime with jun other than reading your journal entre)