#spaghetti harvest

[petermorwood]

This is one of, if not THE, best April Fools jokes ever, and may even be the very first to air on "serious TV". The prank was aired April 1 1957 at the end of the BBC current-affairs programme “Panorama”.

It was helped by spaghetti being a rare exotic food in 1950s Britain, and narration by the hugely respected journalist and presenter Richard Dimbleby made it utterly convincing.

Afterwards people either got the joke - or didn’t, and wanted to grow their own spaghetti trees. These optimists were told to “place a length of dry spaghetti in a jar of tomato sauce and hope for the best”.

*****

The entire spoof got it wrong, of course, since free-range organic spaghetti doesn’t grow on trees at all. 

In actual fact it’s a kind of marshland reed, and very seasonal, only available from March 15 (when by tradition the first harvest is made by use of many small sharp knives) through until April 2nd, when it’s officially declared to be stale.

Extruded lengths of flour-water-egg paste - originally called spaghetti finti or spaghetti di casa - replicate these reeds while being available all year round.

*****

Some humourless pundits indulged in sputtering outrage that such nonsense was part of a serious programme, but "Panorama” producer David Wheeler stuck to his guns, suggesting that viewers needed a more critical attitude to what was shown on TV, and shouldn’t believe everything they saw. 

What would he have said now?

*****

@dduane​ says that for US readers to understand just how effective it was, imagine the same thing on “60 Minutes”, voiced with equal sincerity by Dan Rather.

*****

And oddly enough, what we’re having for supper tonight will be...

Probably not spaghetti.

;->

[emeraldhazeart]

OK, this post gave me an idea, but just so OP doesn't get flooded with notes, I'mma make a separate post:

If you were a Harvest Moon/Story of Seasons/Stardew Valley NPC, reblog with what your ingame "Loved" items would be. Anything giftable counts, doesn't have to be just food.

And what would your "Hated" gifts be?

[normcore569]

Can't wait to cook you tonight 😋

It's harvest season and I love homegrown produce

[just-your-average-cryptid]

It’s 2045. Spring is here and the backyard garden is blooming. Bees buzz happily around you as you trot out with the watering can. Zebra swallowtail caterpillars are trudging along the pawpaw leaves, getting round and plump before their metamorphosis. Birds flutter above in the oak tree, babies chirping incessantly.

The garlic came in a little too well this year, but the neighbors are more than happy to take some - and send you off with their own extras. Someone brings up the zucchini incident and you all laugh a little, knowing you’re still trying to get rid of the damn things.

There’s a group of kids that come by every afternoon to see your goats. You swear the goats know, because they’ll all shift closer to the front and not five minutes later you’ll hear them running down the path. They always ask before they pet, and you’ve never yet said no. You were the same when you first saw them, so you’ve no place to judge; not that you would, really. They soak up the attention like dogs, stubby tails wiggling until the last kid begrudgingly heads home.

The rusting car in the field is their favorite climbing toy. It’s been years since you’ve heard the rumble of an engine. Summer is still, well, summer, but the three-degree days are limited and fall really feels like fall, not just a slight respite from the blistering heat. There hasn’t been a shooting in almost a decade now. When you head out holding your partner’s hand, the only response you get is smiles and fond greetings. You’ve started sketching again, just for the hell of it.

Your roomates are attempting to make dinner and so far haven’t set anything on fire, though they seem a little less focused on the stove and a little more absorbed in tormenting each other with terrible dish ideas. You let them banter for a bit before jumping in with spaghetti and marshmallows. Horrified stares quickly turn into hysterical laughter, and someone wisely comments that they might want to keep their appetites a bit longer. It’s nowhere close to perfect, and certainly not professional, but it tastes like home, and that’s all you need.

It’s not a perfect life, but it’s a good one. The world hasn’t ended yet. With any luck, you’ll make sure it stays that way; the harvest festival is coming, and those zucchinis are getting handed out to anyone in range.

to myself, 22 years from now: there will be another sunrise.

[ryanscabinlife]

The meal I’ve been waiting for the whole year! Well, I always make this spaghetti, but not with stuff from my own garden! Today, I finally had enough ripe and semi-ripened cherry tomatoes to make a serving. I also used one of my garlic heads, which, by the way, are curing nicely. I even managed to pull oregano, thyme, and a bit of basil. Sadly, the onions are not yet ready, so I used a store-bought one. The basil that I managed to harvest is not enough, so I had to use dried basil from the shelf. It’s such an easy, quick, and wholesome lunch. I think my non-existing Italian ancestors would approve. 17-Aug-2023

[poetry-protest-pornography]

In France they celebrate "Poisson d'Avril" (April Fish) where it's a tradition to hook small stinky fish to unsuspecting people. The longer it takes them to notice, the funnier it is (especially if it rots).

In Scotland they have "Hunt the Gowk Day" where gowks (fool, but also a kind of birdl) are sent on false errands to waste their time.

In Ibi, Spain, the entire town engages in a food fight so spectacular that they devise military stratagem in order to battle for control of the town and enact silly laws the rest of the town must follow or get fined.

In Sweden, on "Första April" they say "April, April, you silly fish, I can fool you anywhere I wish." Celebrations are much the same as anywhere else, except you have a second chance on May 1st.

On April 1, 1957, in England, the BBC reported that the spaghetti harvest in southern Switzerland would be early that year because of a mild winter, accompanied by footage of trees draped in pasta being harvested.

Answer below the read more, please don't spoil it in your tags, but please do reblog to share the fun!

All of these are true! April Fools!

Please rb to share some silly traditions!

[just-some-random-blogger]

Character Development

Joel Miller x Reader | Part 2

Summary: Neither of you were in the right headspace to be in a relationship. Everything about you and him was a mutual decision, the start, the middle, the end. And yet, here you were, seeing a bunch of flowers in his hand, thinking, how dare he?

Word Count: 2k+

Warnings: fem!reader, angst, typos, etc.

A/N: this is a late birthday gift for @sloanexx!! happy birthday love. 죽어! (: UPDATE! I MADE A P2! The link is above!! Tagging: @multifandom-fangirl4 @pinksirensong @aralezinspace

You loved the smell of early mornings. You loved waking up to do your chores. You loved going outside for it. You loved needing to stretch before you took your basket in hand and tended to the harvest. You loved that today, you were going to be picking some fruits.

And as you filled your basket to the brim, enough that the container will allow you, enough that your arms will let you carry, you felt satisfied. You felt like you had a sense of purpose.

Purpose was far and few during the apocalypse.

You were happy to have this as your purpose, though not inherently grandiose.

The sound of your boots crunching against dirt filled your ears as a cool morning breeze blew past you.

It was a beautiful day. You were happy to make as many trips back and forth from the storehouse to the gardens until you finish your chores.

Your movements slow when you spot Joel walking off tangent by your path. You see the red flowers in his hands; paintbrushes they were called, you think. You slow even more as you watch him bunch it up with some brown paper and string.

Your brows furrow. Your stomach begins to react.

Joel brings the thin, ropey material to his teeth and begins to chew on it. He effectively cuts it to his desired length.

You see him do this. You stop walking altogether. In lieu of walking, you think about how Joel did the same thing to your spaghetti straps, just because he could. You think about he's dug his teeth into your lips, your thighs, to whatever you would let him sink into. You think about how he asked if he could before each time he did so, though you've told him, rather desperately every instance, that he could bite, squeeze, or do absolutely anything else he wanted with you.

He was good at that. He was good at asking then at being rough, he was good at making you forget then at making you feel good.

He was bad at tying up those flowers... or whatever it was he was attempting to do. You wonder why he even bothered going through the effort of making an arrangement. Ellie would have appreciated the flowers whether or not it was wrapped in paper and string.

You begin to feel your arms tire so you lean to one side and plop your basket on your hip. You then decide to make your way to Joel to help him achieve whatever it was he wanted to with those flowers.

Your boots crunch against the dirt again, but this time around, you walking doesn't slow, it just stops abruptly.

"Joel," she says, calling the said man's attention.

You stand there, watching the woman walk up to Joel with a smile. She was dressed in a flowy dress. He was dressed in a worn-out flannel. They looked like they had nothing to do with each other. Joel smiles at her. But they also looked like they complimented each other.

Her name was Abella. She had just gotten here a few weeks ago. She was sweet and thoughtful. She was just like this morning, beautiful and refreshing.

"Need some help?" she asks.

Joel turns from her to the flowers, paper, and string in his hand, then shakes his head, "I don't think that would be appropriate."

Abella raises a brow, "why not?"

"Well," he sighs and shrugs, handing her the flowers anyway, "cause these are for you."

What the fuck.

Abella is shocked. You're aghast.

Joel presses his lips tightly, "they say it's the thought that counts."

What the actual fuck.

Abella chuckles and takes the flowers from him, "wow," she cannot hold back her smile, even though she badly wanted to, "yeah... it is the thought that counts."

Thought that counts?

She giggles, "thank you, Joel."

Give me a fucking break.

Where were the thoughts that counted when you made him a shitty pie? All he did was complain about how you got the crust wrong and how it was way too sweet. The thought didn't count then. Of course, you gave him shit for giving you shit over your attempts. He then he taught you a very... hard, rough, and loud lesson not to get on his nerves again, not that you were complaining after. And for that precise reason, you made it a point to--

What the- It doesn't matter!

What matters was he was there with Abella, looking at her as she explained to him what her chores were for the day was.

"Let me help," Joel retorts.

Your lips part.

He never offered to do that with you. You feel the basket dig into your hip. Ok, to be fair, you normally egged him on to join you, so he had no choice but to do so in the end.

You watched him smile as Abella rambled.

Wait... was that it? You were too annoying?

You continue to watch them speak to each other, but at this point you're too lost in your thoughts to hear a word they said. All you knew was Abella is laughing, leaning into Joel, gripping his bicep, and he's laughing with her.

Then it plays in 2x speed. The day you met him and how Tommy introduced Joel as his brother. The day you told him he had a nice butt and how he grunted in response. The day you kissed him and how he pushed you away. You remember how he said he didn't want anything, much less anything serious. You eagerly agreed and kissed him again. Serious was scary and cumbersome, you added. He didn't push you away after.

You remember it was when you were tracing the lines on his face that you fucked up. You remember the day you looked at him too long and Joel noticed, so he quipped, 'if you slap my ass when I walk by, you're gonna get it.'

You didn't. You didn't slap his ass when he walked by. You didn't move. You didn't say anything. You just watched as he walked by and felt your breath hitch at the scent of his soap. You just looked at him as he moved across the room and realized you fucked up real good.

You thought over, and over, and over again you did the right thing in telling him, because you had to get it out of your system. You thought over, and over, and over again that he did the right thing in telling you that he didn't feel the same way, because it was the truth. You thought that you were both adults and that it was good both of you thought to end this thing. It was for the best, because it was. You wouldn't feel bad, you didn't feel bad. Why would you? It was to be expected. At least you had a good run.

But damn, flowers for the pretty girl? Flowers and paper and string?

You wouldn't have cared but you hadn't expected this to happen. Why was he suddenly doing this? And... why not you? Were you not pretty enough, or rather, were you not pretty at all to him? Were you not a flowers-and-paper-and-string kind of girl? Were you not worth that much extra effort? He didn't even put that much effort, it's the thought that counts-- dear fuck-

You shake your head and gulp. You wipe your face and decide this was not the time to do this. This was not the day to do this. It was such a beautiful day. It won't change any time soon.

You release a breath and begin to walk again. You make it a point not to go anywhere near them as you head to the store house.

But you didn't expect the next thing that happened either.

You freeze in your spot when you hear her call your name and say good morning.

Fuck, you shouldn't have froze. You could have walked off and pretended like you didn't hear. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.

You turn over your shoulder and pretend you didn't know it was Abella that called out to you. You smile at her as she waves. You say good morning back, but she tortures you by starting small talk.

"Are those apples?"

You catch the look on Joel's face, "yeah... want one?"

"Oh," Abella looks bashful, "no, no-- sorry, I was just curious."

Fuck it. "Well then you should both get one," you say, walking over to them.

The moment you're in front of them, you fish for an apple for Abella and hand it to her. You then fish an apple for Joel and hand it to him with the best poker face you could pull. You do yourself one better by softening your expression with a smile.

Joel looks at you for a prolonged moment before apprehensively taking the apple from you. In truth, he betrays himself by acting like you haven't talked at all after ending things. Why was he acting so guilty?

You purse your lips into a lopsided grin, "good morning, Joel."

Joel takes the fruit in both hands and smiles softly, "mornin', doll."

Your breath hitches. You quickly turn away from him.

Joel catches himself in that moment and shifts in his spot, "sorry, force of hab-"

"It's fine," you quip, turning to him quickly before turning to Abella to offer a tight smile, "see you two at lunch then."

Abella smiles back and nods, cradling both her apple and her flowers in her arm, "see you at lunch!"

You walk away after that, grunting as you carried your apples with you. They are uncomfortably heavy now for some reason. Damn gravity. Damn emotions.

Joel notices this and immediately perks. He mindlessly turns away from Abella, handing her his apple to walk over to you and mutter, "let me help."

You don't have a moment to decline as suddenly he's beside you, helping you carry the basket.

Joel offers you a soft smile as he does so.

You wanted to lunge at him and bash all the fruits into his skull. You wanted to scream. But you don't. Instead you pull on your best face and muster all your strength, yanking the basket out of his hands.

Joel is shocked by the action.

You click your tongue and raise a brow at him, "mama didn't raise no wimp."

He looks at you, wordlessly.

You grip your heavy basket in both hands and manage a playful expression, "don't you think if I wanted your help, I would have demanded it by now?"

Joel thinks for a moment. He's doesn't know what to say.

"Besides... aren't you going to help Abella?" you tilt your head to her direction.

He still says nothing.

You release a breath, "I'm not an idiot," you mutter lowly, "she's sweet and pretty and you picked her flowers," you find it in you to smile, "good for you."

His lips part. His hands twitch. You instantly turn away from him when he calls out your name.

"See you two later," you call out dismissively, walking away in a hurry.

Joel furrows his brows tightly. He thinks about running after you, but instead he places a hand on his hip. He does nothing but watch as you walk farther away. He only turns around because Abella calls his name. When he sees her innocent expression, he releases a soft breath and lets himself smile at her.

[thesoftboiledegg]

Rick fucked up with the spaghetti as per usual, but I think this episode hinted that he's more reluctant to take Morty on dangerous adventures. In seasons 1-3, he probably would've flown Morty to the planet, shoved him in front of the corpses (who likely would've been murder instead of suicide victims to make it ultra-dark) and forced him to harvest the spaghetti as he stares in horror.

Here, Rick tried to hide the truth from him until Morty caught him with the dead body, which forced his hand. Morty hasn't tagged along with him in season seven that much in general, implying that Rick's less willing to throw him in danger all the time.

[annaizscribbling]

In which the farmer is not quite human pt 4: Gus

(start at pt 1 here) also I'm posting these on ao3 gradually, but tumblr will still get them first aye.

Gus unlocked the front door to the saloon at exactly noon, just like he always did. He didn’t really expect somebody for a couple of hours, but sometimes a few folks will wander in for lunch or a midday refreshment. He doesn’t expect much on a random rainy Tuesday, but he’s consistent—an important trait in a business owner. He takes great pride in being dependently consistent.

He walked back to the bar counter and picked up a couple of glasses that needed to be polished. He kept everything perfectly spic and span, homey, and comfortable. It was important that the other townsfolk felt cozy in the saloon, that’s why Gus kept a bit of ragtag furniture, warm lights, and the scent of delicious food at all times.

And it worked! Friday nights especially were so busy that he wouldn’t know what to do with himself if not for Emily helping out part time. Robin and Demetrius usually play some nostalgic song and dance together, Shane hangs out by himself with a sparkling water these days, Pam sits by the bar and gets intoxicated while chatting with him, Mayor Lewis and Marnie flirt in the corner, Elliot and Leah share some wine, Willy orders himself something strong and indulges Clint, who just stares at Emily and mopes, Harvey gets and strong coffee and tiredly enjoys the show, Pierre escapes his family to get some scotch alone, Abigail claims her favorite couch to watch the weekly pool games, where Sam and Sebastian play until Sam gives up on trying to win a single match.

And sometimes, Sebastian’s wife tags along. Not always, she doesn’t come every week. Farming is a taxing job, Gus imagines, and she does a whole lot more than just farming, so it makes sense that she has less time than her househusband. She rarely showed up at all before they got married, and even then, she showed up solely to see Sebastian before sprinting out the door again.

Gus liked the farmer; she was a nice woman. She helped Gus out on more than one occasion when he was in a pinch, she was a great listener, a valuable customer, and a friendly, albeit unpredictable face. When she shows up on Friday nights, she usually hangs around her husband, watches them play pool, sits with Abigail, and then stares. She does a lot of staring, not usually at people or anything, but at the wall, or the ceiling, or the floor. It seems like she sees things that aren’t there, like she’s reading or browsing through sometimes. Most of Pelican town doesn’t question it, it’s just something she does.

Other Friday nights she seemed to be in a more excitable mood, which meant that she didn’t smile more or anything, but continuously paid for a variety of food from Gus then distributed them among at least half of the customers in the saloon. Salad for Leah, beer for Pam, spaghetti for Robin, pizza for Sam and Shane, coffee for Harvey, and whatever the special is for anybody who wants it. She was a very generous person, a little odd, but undeniably generous. She brought him a crate of oranges from her orange tree every time she had a good harvest, which he would thank her for by sending her and Sebastian something special for dinner.

Gus is interrupted from his thoughts when the door swings open.

Standing in the door way is one sopping wet farmer, who smiles at him as she drips all over his welcome mat. A cold draft breezes into the room, clashing against the warm saloon air. Gus pauses from polishing.

“Hey,” Gus says with a wry smile, “you look like you could use a beverage. And maybe a towel,” he tosses the rag he was using at her. Her arm shoots out without her glancing at it, and she snatches the rag out of the air like an instinct. He’s heard things about her skill in the mines, maybe the reflexes are a result of that.

“Sorry,” she says, dabbing some of the water off of her skin and wiping her feet on the mat politely. She’s still extremely damp, but not quite dripping wet anymore.

“It’s no issue, make yourself at home,” Gus said kindly, picking up another rag and gesturing with his chin at some of the bar stools. The farmer slid into a seat and picked up a menu, though any resident of Pelican Town knew exactly what was on it save the special.

“Thirsty?” Gus offered. “There’s nothing like a glass of dry red wine on a day like this, huh?” he chuckled, but raised his eyebrows, wondering if she’d be swayed into a drink. He knew she didn’t drink very much at all, but every so often she indulged herself.

Today, it did not seem to be the case. She shook her head and pointed at the menu with a shy smile.

“Oh, a pizza? Good choice, for here or to-go?” Gus asked, rolling up his sleeves.

“To-go, please,” she said politely.

Gus nodded, and began to walk toward the oven to put a few in. “Just one?”

“No.”

“Two?”

“Thirty-five.”

“Thirty-five?” Gus repeated her in disbelief, eyes widening. He turned back to gape at her, to see if she was trying to be funny or something, but she looked completely serious.

“Yes please,” the farmer said with a little nod.

Gus blinked slowly. There weren’t even that many people in all of Pelican Town. What could she possibly do with thirty-five whole pizzas? She and Sebastian couldn’t eat all those. Did the rain mess with her head?!

“… so, you want thirty-five pizzas to-go,” he said slowly, waiting for her to stop him. She didn’t. “Alright. Well. That is going to be, um, 4200 dollars.”

“Okay,” she said before digging around in her bag before pausing to look back up at him. “What’s the special today?” she asked, tilting her head.

“… pumpkin soup.”

“Two of those as well please.”

“Right. Why not? Yes. I’ll have that right out for you,” Gus said a little faintly as he rung up her total and accepted her payment, which she handed over without any hesitation.

She nodded patiently and began to organize her backpack as Gus crept away to go get her food ready.

Twenty minutes later, Gus managed to get everything done. He was sweating and a little frazzled, but he did it. Though he would have killed for Emily���s help. He had half a mind to call her in desperation, but he pulled himself together and got the food. The money was more than worth it.

He had all thirty-five pizzas and two pumpkin soups laid out on the counter in some Styrofoam containers, ready for her to somehow transport it all in the torrential rain.

“Are you having a party or something? That’s quite a bit of pizza for two people,” Gus said casually, trying not to seem invasive. Usually, people just told him all kinds of things about themselves and their days, the farmer wasn’t quite as much of an open book. Though even if she was, Gus wasn't so sure he'd be able to even understand her language.

“The soup is for Sebastian and me. For dinner,” The farmer said quietly, popping open the lid to one of the pizza containers.

“And the thirty-five pizzas?”

“I’m going mining. Keeps up my energy,” she said as she picked up the open Styrofoam container in one hand and her open backpack in the other.

“And you’re bringing full pizzas with you? Thirty-five of them?”

She nodded once, before tipping the to-go box over, forcing the pizza to fall with a wet squelch directly into her open backpack.

Gus stared in horror.

The farmer proceeded to do this exact same thing to every single one of the remaining thirty-four pizzas, dropping them face first into her bag and neatly stacking the empty to-go boxes. When she was done, her bag was full of pizzas stacked on top of each other upside down with absolutely no container. She gingerly placed the soup bowls on top of the pile of dough and sauce and cheese. It made a squishing sound. She didn't even bother with lids for the soup.

Gus did not manage to find a single word to say for the entire duration of this.

“Should last me a few trips, thank you, Gus,” the farmer said chipperly before putting her backpack on, turning around and sprinting out the door, back into the rain, before Gus could so much as wave her goodbye.

Gus considered calling Harvey and telling him to expect a case of food poisoning but thought better of it. She was a successful farmer, friend, businesswoman, and wife to her husband. The farmer must know what she was doing. She could have her … eccentricities, he supposed.

[owl-eyed--witch]

Lughnasadh is right around the corner! Harvest season is upon us with its delightful foods fresh from the Earth. To the witches who are last minute, to the witches who don't know how to make bread (like me), to the witches who can't cook or bake or lack confidence/resources/money to do sabbat recipes:

Going to the store or to the farmers market to buy local fruits, veggies, pies, bread is absolutely valid.

Go nuts. Have fun. Eat lots.

I'll be eating a shit ton of berries, dipping my artisan bread in my spaghetti and making corn on the cob on my stove.

Happy Lughnasadh to all! 🌻☀️🌾🍓🌽

[confusedhomicidalrage]

Welcome to this hellhole! 🙋🏻

Inactive for a while: Currently in the psych ward, only here on weekends and holidays

❌DNI! Racists, Homophobia, Transphobia, terfs, Anti-Xenogender, Anti-Therian, Anti-Furry, Ableism, Zionists, Sexists, MAP/Pedo (supporters), If you don't like @shakespeare-official-account and @brains4ne❌

⁠✯!Info Sheet!✯

🩹Basic Information!🩹

💳Name: Fips

📇"Signature" name: (⁠｡⁠•̀⁠ᴗ⁠-⁠)⁠✯ (I DO NOT OWN THIS SIGN, I JUST USE IT FOR MOST OF MY ACCOUNTS!)

🗂️Nicknames: Fipsy, Fip, Eli, Bassie, Fi, Ribby, Rose, Fipsolino, Fipsidipsi

🗒️🩷Pet names: Puppy, Bun, Pookie, Darling, sweetie, Froggie

🗃️Dead name: Unavailable

🔞Age: Under 18

📏Height: 5'2" (160 cm)

⚖️Weight: Unavailable

🎁Birthday: 26th of April

🐂Zodiac Sign: Taurus

🗺️Country I live in: Germany

🇩🇪Nationality: German

🇺🇲🇩🇪Languages I speak: English, German

🏳️‍⚧️♂️Gender: Bxy, Transmale, and many many Xenogenders!

🌈Sexuality: Aroace (Aromantic, Asexual)

⚧️Pronouns: Any, except She/her

🩺Mental illnesses: Autism, Depression

🎉More stuff about me!🎉

🎇🤩Current Special interests: Sam Neill, frogs, Kirby, Oscar Wilde

🩷Other things I like: Plushies, newsies, poppy playtime, dolls, Beware! Children at play, moths, Leeches, dogs, cats, flowers, snakes, the umbrella academy, Julius Caesar, space, Saw, Axolotls, the good son (1993), Basically any movie Sam Neill played in, Daniel isn't real, Dark Deception, Murder by Numbers (2002), ducks, Murder drones, clocks, Game of thrones, The umbrella academy, cry of fear, minks, seals, The Lucius games, The omen (the first three), the big bang theory/the little bang theory (basically Sheldon Cooper and young Sheldon), Children of the corn, bandages and bandaids, language learning, Historical figures, Struwwelpeter

🙅🏻Things I dislike: Bright/neon lights, loud noise (my music doesn't count), the words "crawling and "armpits", spiders, Flashing lights, spitting

💕"Favorite" stuff!💕

💖🍝🥐🍫Favorite Foods: Spaghetti Bolognese and Chocolate filled croissants

💖🍫🥛Favorite Drink: Chocolate milkshake

💖🌻Favorite Flower: Sunflowers

💖❄️Favorite Season: Winter

💖🎆Favorite Holiday: New Year's Eve

💖🐸Favorite Animal: Frogs

💖🎥Favorite Movie Genre: Horror

💖🖍️Favorite color: The most specific shade of maroon red ever

✖️"Least Favorite" stuff!✖️

🤢🦐Least favorite Food: Shrimps... (Ew!)

🤢🥤Least Favorite Drink: Vanilla stuff

🤢💐Least Favorite Flower: Unavailable

🤢☀️Least Favorite Season: Summer

🤢🥂Least Favorite Holiday: Thanksgiving

🤢🕷️Least Favorite Animal: Spiders

🤢🎬Least Favorite Movie Genre: Unavailable

🤢🌈Least favorite color: Neon/bright colors

👨‍👩‍👧‍👦Family/Relationships!👨‍👩‍👧‍👦

👫🏻Siblings: 7 older siblings; none of them use Tumblr! :(

👨‍👨‍👧‍👦👩‍👩‍👧‍👦Parents: "4", one biological mom, one biological dad, one step-dad, technically one step-mom

🐈‍⬛Pet: A cat called Fritzy

💞Bestie: Lawrence/lauren (@brains4ne) (I adopted Eli, Joshua, Micah, Josiah, Mordecai, Abel, Isaac and Malachai with them)

💕Queer-platonic partner: River, I don't know if they use Tumblr, but I doubt it!

👨‍👨‍👦‍👦Adopted Fictional children: Eli and Joshua Porter (children of the corn; Urban harvest), Micah and Mordecai (Children of the corn; Final Sacrifice), Abel (Children of the corn; Revelation), Isaac Chroner, Malachai Boardman, Job, Sarah and Joseph (Children of the corn, 1994), Josiah Nock (Children of the corn; The gathering), Matt (Children of the corn; Isaac's return)

🐈Fictional pet: Lancekitty (Something that started off as a joke on @thornonthevine, but now it's the Family's pet..)

💫Other Random stuff!💫

➡️Side blogs: @real-antonio-vivaldi, @messy-stimboard-disaster, @lord-alfred-douglas-official, @germanifier

⚠️Important: Please don't spam my inbox with stuff. Unless you are Shakesdear. To me, it feels like me and her spamming each other is sort of like a unique love language, so please don't spam my inbox unless you are Shakesdear!

[nikkeisimmer]

End of Days

Chapter 1; Part 1

The end did not come quickly. Nor was it an calamitous event being foreshadowed by many. Most would not even realize it was occurring. In fact, there were many weeks still left of existence for a lot of the people of the town. And life went on as usual.

Clarissa and Bebe were happily fishing at the Central Park pond hoping to catch enough fish to either sell or to put towards cooking a decent dinner for the five of them. After all, their mind was on making a decent shelter by fall. Phil had dropped off his prized meteorites to Dave Ramsey who was manning the till at the counter as usual at Aleister’s. Phil had managed to get them in before the deadline and hopefully they would all sell, which hopefully would bring in a pretty hefty chunk of change for the group so that they could get started with making the foundation to their new home.

It also meant that Haruo who was definitively into collecting would also have to get some things started with the gemstones that he already had in his pocket – and some of them as far as River knew were valuable and would give them enough to break ground. As it was, it was going to be slow going and the five were going to be spending the majority of their time outdoors trying to keep from getting soaked when the rains came. The other alternative was to try to go down to the fitness center on the corner of Water Lily and Main or 28 Hour Fitness as it was known and use their showers and try to get some shut-eye indoors so that they didn’t get drenched. Either that or build a lean-to of sorts that they could use in a pinch. Although that didn’t seem like much. Even a glorified shack would do wonders for them. But they needed the simoleons for that and that wouldn’t come easily.

Haruo was currently over at 97 Waterfall Way harvesting some lettuce. Always nice to have greens and lettuce not only did it hold a lot of water, but it was also fibrous too – at least it would keep them constant. Just dig a nice deep hole.

Phil made some grilled cheese sandwiches, a key lime pie and spaghetti for his friends so that they wouldn’t go hungry. Now it was trying to find a table and chairs for them to eat off of.

Afterwards, Phil went off to dumpster dive for items to sell, but unfortunately, there happened to be a freak meteor storm, which ended up flattening poor Kaelynn Langerak ending her life. This would foreshadow much worse to come as the cosmic pummelling would continue.

Nightfall came very quickly and a last meal was eaten by all before the five headed off to bed, which was essentially pick a spot on the ground and collapse from exhaustion. Considering it rained earlier in the night, which they had to suffer through, not only were they exhausted but wet and miserable too. Even though the rain was warm, it just made things even worse since the night was usually cold and the mornings meant that the temperature dropped even further chilling them right to the bone. But luckily it wasn’t frost but they would have to do something about the fact that they were living in the open and unable to do anything about the weather. They would need to get under some cover.

The first night was absolutely uncomfortable. For all the appearances of flat ground, there were still dips, rises and indentations in the ground that meant that lying on the ground usually meant that something was going to poke into your back. River’s solution to getting the wind out of her face was to sleep under Haruo’s leg. Luckily he was so exhausted from harvesting wild plants, that he pretty much conked out and didn’t twitch a single muscle. Luckily he also didn’t let loose any gas either – that would have been singularly unpleasant.

End Part 1

[jazzmckay]

after much discussion with friends, a lot of wiki and codex reading, throwing spaghetti at the wall, and arranging details in spreadsheet format, i have some up with an approximate headcanon for everything that happened in thedas' ancient history. some aspects im still on the fence about / don't have a strong enough inclination one way or the other to be steadfast in my thoughts, so there's definitely room for adjustment.

spoilers for just about everything, as what little we know canonically is sprinkled throughout. since we know so little and almost none of it comes from a 100% reliable source, all of this is purely headcanon and what i personally think seems viable AND cool. it's not intended to be a hard statement for what i think is the truth

in as close to a coherent order as i can manage:

the titans, the evanuris, and the forgotten ones all come into existence close enough together that there isn't much hierarchy in who was first

the titans are the denizens of the physical world, the others are denizens of the spiritual. the evanuris and the forgotten ones are all spirits of some nature to start with, then make physical forms for themselves -- much like cole did. they have features of both spirits and (im)mortals, and are capable of shapeshifting

magic is EVERYWHERE, including below the ground, where the titans reside, their blood acting as a magical foci

the titans create dwarves. the dwarves have magic

solas is a spirit of wisdom and pride, simultaneously

mythal is a spirit of justice and vengeance, simultaneously

the evanuris lean towards the "spirit" side, while the forgotten ones lean towards the "demon" side, which is not a dichotomy of good and bad, as the evanuris can be corrupted, and the forgotten ones can be righteous. an individual is more balanced when tapping into both aspects. solas is the most balanced, his wisdom and pride tempering and guiding each other

the evanuris are the most powerful elvhen as they were formed from spirit essence itself, while those descended from them have magic but are not usually so attuned to the source of it (ghilan'nain has a remarkably unique power that eventually earns her a place among the evanuris)

there is conflict between the evanuris and the titans, because the titans cause earthquakes that destroy elvhen settlements. the evanuris and the forgotten ones disagree on how to handle this, about the evanuris wanting to dominate all others, and potentially about what applications of magic are "acceptable"

the forgotten ones release their physical forms to become fully spirits again and descend into the void

solas remains somewhat neutral in the conflict. he agrees with the forgotten ones that the evanuris have no right to exert their will over other beings, but he does not agree with some of the practices of the forgotten ones either. he remains, determined to show the evanuris the error of their ways. the forgotten ones still respect him as one of them, and solas gains mythal's favour. he can walk among both groups

mythal strikes down the titans. the evanuris decide to harvest titan blood for their magical use. this has a drastic effect on the dwarves -- losing close contact with the titans muffles the stone and silences their magic. the evanuris use the dwarves to harvest lyrium

(jumping forward a loooot of time, the breach in the veil awakens a titan as it feels its magical connection strengthening. valta comes into contact with this titan and gains magic)

solas tries and fails to sway the evanuris entirely. mythal hears him, and a couple others go back and forth, but it isn't nearly enough to change things for the better, which leads to the all-out war and rebellion. during this, andruil has been hunting the forgotten ones in the void, becoming more fractured from it, and other members of the evanuris have been becoming more corrupt, adding tension especially between mythal and the others as she has to temper them

the last straw: the evanuris "kill" mythal, and solas loses his balance. he puts up the veil, trapping the evanuris in the fade, and the forgotten ones in the void. arlathan -- the golden city -- falls into the void and becomes corrupted with the taint. the elves on the other side of the veil become mortal and no longer inherently magical, experiencing something similar to what happened to the dwarves.

solas goes into uthenera, disappearing from the world

in time, the chantry will claim that the maker raised the veil because he was disappointed in the spirits, but ended up disappointed in mortals too, and turned away from the world

mythal fuses with flemeth -- i don't have a solid opinion on when exactly in the timeline this happened

the forgotten ones manage to call out to human mages, who summon them out of the fade/void. those who become the dragon gods tevinter worship are now referred to as "old gods" and the rest are "the forbidden ones". the magisters learn blood magic from them, and eventually enter the fade/void to seek out the golden city. it leaves them tainted, and brings about the darkspawn and the blight

additional theory i am still toying with and hammering out: some of the forgotten ones also manage to take physical, elvhen form again, and become the kossith, who create the qunari through blood magic involving either dragon blood and/or archdemon blood once the blights start

andraste's magic is either the cause of or triggered by a traumatic experience with her sister that her sister doesn't survive. from then on, she dreams of the fade, and interprets memories of solas' rebellion against the evanuris as guidance to fight against tevinter -- both the evanuris and the magisters are powerful mages and the leaders of a society with slavery. seeing her 'maker' in elvhen form inspires her to ally with shartan. both the orlesian and the imperial chantries are formed

eventually, solas wakes up to a fucking nightmare ✨

[rhiannatruex]

Here’s the update to the spaghetti dye pot.

Dye used was a dyer’s polypore harvested by yours truly. Yarn is merino single spun. Mordant was vinegar and copper. My mushroom did not disappoint!!!

[edierone]

oh my fucking godddd do I hate Invisalign jfc this is the worrrrssstttt. it’s awful when the trays are in, and 1300% worse when they’re out - it’s like having legos glued to the fronts of my teeth, chewing food like im a god damned agriculture processing machine - I am the harvester combine of like. sandwiches and spaghetti - I hate it so fucking much and I’m only five weeks in to my 12-18 month sentence - I didn’t think anything could be worse than all those fucking gum grafts but GUESS THE FUCK WHAT

[ruvviks]

HIIIIII asking abt thaddeus 🫡

🎮🔱(would he manage to swim away from queen mirelurk)🐷🌴💘🍝🤔🧐

oc asks for thaddeus tiberius! (NO WORRIES ABOUT HIS NAME i do also have a thaddeus but i'll answer these for tiberius only :])

🎮 VIDEO GAME CONTROLLER — what are three of your oc's favorite hobbies?

tiberius likes building, cooking, and drawing! he doesn't draw all that often anymore post-war but he does build a lot in his free time, there's always stuff that needs fixing in settlements so he will help out there a lot more than necessary

🔱 TRIDENT EMBLEM — can your oc swim? do they enjoy swimming?

tiberius is a decent swimmer but they don't like doing it all that much. they've never been a big fan of water in general since they fell out of the boat as a child one time when they were out on a lake fishing with their father :( especially nowadays with the irradiated water and the scary creatures in there he really tries to avoid swimming at all costs

🐷 PIG FACE — what is your oc's favorite animal?

tiberius LOVES deer!! that includes radstag :] one reason he likes hanging out at the castle so much is because of the radstag farm they have there

🌴 PALM TREE — does your oc have a green thumb? do they enjoy gardening?

tiberius isn't the best with gardening but he'll do it if it's asked of him when staying in a settlement. they don't like getting dirt stuck under their nails (like. literally. it's a bad feeling) so generally they try to avoid having to stick their hands into dirt. he does like harvesting crops though! much easier

💘 HEART WITH ARROW — what and/or who do(es) your oc consider the most important to them?

answered here!

🍝 SPAGHETTI — what is/are your oc's favorite food(s)?

i'm still working on a bunch of cool post-war foods but tiberius would like grilled radstag a lot, or a good radscorpion egg omelet. making fries is pretty difficult in the wasteland since there's not really any potatoes there but tiberius steals a bunch of crops from the institute to grow potatoes on the surface too and he can't wait for the first harvest so he can finally make some good fries

🤔 THINKING FACE — what are some of your oc's quirks/mannerisms?

tiberius is the equivalent of the standing man emoji. he barely gestures, doesn't fidget, is not interested enough in his surroundings to be actively looking around while idling, he's just standing there and once he can leave he leaves. if you don't know him well it can be a bit intimidating but he's really not bothered or anything, that's just his resting face and he's just vibing. don't worry about it

other than that he clicks his tongue a lot and has a tendency of saying stupid one liners after successfully sniping an enemy. they started doing it ironically but it stuck

🧐 FACE WITH MONOCLE — is your oc more logical or emotional?

tiberius is very logical and especially after the incident in the glowing sea with the children of atom he's basically just a brick and doesn't really make decisions with his heart anymore. it doesn't mean that they don't care or are just completely emotionally unavailable, but it's just a lot harder for them to express any of it openly and especially when making important decisions it's their priority to solve the problem, if feelings get hurt along the way they can deal with that later