#still i managed to finish before 1am which has to be a new record for procrastination packing

[nerdie-faerie]

Finally finished packing <- hasn't packed a single pair of socks

[star-six7]

And You’re Someone Who Knows Someone (Who Was Someone I Once Knew)

Mikey Way x Reader (Gender Neutral)

Word Count: 1909

Request: Could I request anything with Mikey? Thanks :)

A/N: I am so sorry about the delay on this one! I’ve been drowning in school and work at the moment, but I’m still thinking of you guys, I promise! Also, catch that title reference ;)

Disclaimer: This is entirely a work of fiction. No part of this story is meant to be libel, slander, or in any way derogatory towards any character’s real life counterpart. I’m not delusional; I know that these characters are simply based off of a public persona and may not actually resemble the people behind those personas. Any additional characters that you do not recognize are entirely fictional, unless otherwise stated. And finally, if you got here by Googling yourself, whatever happens next is 100% on you.

You rocked back and forth on the balls of your feet anxiously as you stood in front of the chain-link fence. Finally, a large guy with a security shirt came into your view, calling out your name.

“Hey,” he grinned when you nodded. “It’s good to finally meet you in person; Gerard’s been chattering nonstop about you for the past few days. I’m Worm, I’m in charge of most of the security for the band; I’ll take you back now.”

“Okay,” you nodded, putting away the backstage pass that Gerard had mailed to you. You were slightly taken aback by the professional quality of the whole set-up; the last time you had been to a My Chem show, it had been in a much less… respectable venue, and there wasn’t even the faintest idea of guards and backstage passes. Something told you that the security probably wasn’t the only thing that had changed over the last few years...

While you were lost in your thoughts, Worm had led you through a back parking lot filled with big box trucks and busy stage crews right to the band’s bus. He punched in a key-code, and grandly guided you up the steps. 

“Gerard, your esteemed guest has arrived!” He winked good-naturedly at you, and then turned to leave. “Soundcheck at four, please attempt to think about being there in some semblance of a timely manner.” He rolled his eyes as he exited the bus.

Gerard, of course, didn’t hear him because he was too busy leaping off the couch so he could tackle you. “You’re here!”

“Yes,” you grinned, attempting to pat his back and keep your balance at the same time. “It’s been so long, Gerard, how are you?”

He let go and returned your smile. “I’ve been great, really great. A lot better than I was the last time we met. Um,” he ran a hand through his close-cropped white hair, and glanced sideways at Mikey. “You remember Ray and Mikey, right?”

“Of course,” you grinned at them. “How could I not? I did go to all of your shows for a year.”

“Well, uh, Otter ended up leaving after we finished recording Three Cheers, so that’s Bob- say hi, Bob- oh! And you remember Pencey, right? Well, Frankie’s with us now, and I think that about covers it.”

You waved at them. You remembered Frank’s wild nature, not surprised that he fit in so well with My Chem, and Bob seemed nice enough. All of the guys seemed genuinely excited about your presence, though you couldn’t shake the feeling that there were some conspiratorial glances and nudges being thrown around by everyone except Mikey. In fact, the bassist in question was doing his best to look artfully bored from his place on the couch and ignore Frank’s not-so-subtle shoving. Still, you felt a certain tug towards him, even after all these years.

“C’mon!” Gerard said brightly, snapping you out of your observations. “Let me give you the grand tour.”

The rest of the afternoon passed by in a whirlwind of wandering the bus park and venue with Gerard, watching the guys soundcheck from the nosebleeds, and dining on pizza in the green room. You were so glad you had been able to make it to a show; Gerard was one of your closest friends, and it had been a couple of years since you had last met. 

Your friendship had started during your senior year of college- you had both had an internship in the same building, albeit for different companies and lines of work. Since then, you had bonded over several of your shared interests and kept in touch, leading you to go to several of the first My Chem shows, and by extension, meet Ray, Frank, and Mikey. Though your busy work life and their crazy tour schedule had caused you to drift apart, it felt like no time had passed at all as you watched Ray swat Frank for stealing his pizza while Gerard and Mikey laughed uncontrollably at Ray’s exasperated expression.

Soon enough, it was time for them to go onstage, which became evident when the venue’s stage manager knocked on the door to lead them to the curtain. Worm reappeared and guided you to the seat marked on your ticket from Gerard- a center stage view from the very first row of actual seats behind the pit. Clearly, Gerard had wanted to make sure you didn’t miss a single part of the show.

The lights dimmed, and you watched two crewmembers dressed as doctors and nurses wheel out a covered gurney while the sound of a heartbeat monitor played over the sound system. You were unsurprised when Gerard leapt out of the gurney moments later, kicking off the show. 

You already knew the guys were awe-inspiring onstage- you had known it from the way you felt the first time you saw them live- but it was clear to see that over the past few years, they had taken it to a whole new level. They had each grown into their stage personas and their identity as a band, but your eyes kept drifting to one member in particular...

You had noticed it earlier today, but Mikey had definitely evolved since the last time you had met. He seemed much more sure of himself onstage; instead of retreating to the space almost directly behind Gerard, he often came up to the edge of the stage or interacted with his bandmates. He also seemed more relaxed off stage, easily interacting with fans outside of the venue and joking before the show with the rest of the band and crew. You couldn’t deny that he was a far cry from Gerard’s shy, slightly awkward, little brother you had met all those years ago.

Before you knew it, the show was over, and Frank was insisting on heading to a nearby diner for several plates of french fries and milkshakes. You glanced at your watch and balked. “Shit… I’m sorry guys, it’s almost 1am and I didn’t get a hotel. I think I’m going to start the drive home.”

Frank and Gerard glanced at each other, and then they rushed to stop you. “Don’t be ridiculous, come with us and you can just stay on the bus!”

“I don’t want to take up anyone’s space…” You hemmed.

“It’s fine!” Ray insisted. “Don’t even worry about it, you can sleep in the back lounge, it’s honestly very nice.”

Though you were suspicious of their enthusiasm, you accepted their offer with a shrug and followed the rest of the group in their search for a 24 hour diner.

…

You sighed as you took off your shoes and settled into the bed in the back lounge. You were exhausted; the long day of walking, dancing, and socializing was starting to catch up to you. However, just as soon as you had stretched out across the soft surface and closed you, you were startled upright by the sound of yelling coming from the bunk area just behind the lounge door. Confused, you opened it to see Mikey, looking irate, and Frank looking guilty yet slightly pleased with himself.

“What the actual fuck, Frank?” Mikey glared accusingly at him.

“I’m really sorry Mikey, it was-”

“An accident? Frank, we all know you’re clumsy as fuck, but there’s absolutely no way someone pours an entire liter of soda directly on my bunk on accident!”

“Oh shit,” you said, stepping out of the doorway to assess the damage.

Mikey glanced at you. “Sorry if I woke you up, Frank’s just being ridiculous.”

“Mikey, I don’t think you’re gonna be able to sleep here tonight,” Ray said, gently prodding Mikey’s mattress. “It’s pretty soaked.”

“Oh, well, of course,” Mikey sighed irritably. “Well, couch it is, then.”

“Actually,” Gerard piped up, oh-so-helpfully, “there’s plenty of space in the back lounge.” He turned to you. “If you’re okay with sharing, that is.”

You stared at him, trying to figure out his plan here. You were pretty sure that if he could bat his eyelashes right now, he would. Ignoring your suddenly accelerating heart rate, you turned back to Mikey.

“I don’t mind sharing, it is your bus after all,” you shrugged, glancing at Mikey. “Gerard’s right, there’s plenty of room.”

The other three looked extremely pleased with themselves.

“Thank you,” he told you, before turning to glare at Frank and head into the bathroom to change.

A few minutes later, you were in the back lounge again, somewhat awkwardly laying on one half of the double bed as you waited for Mikey to turn off the lights and get settled.

He looked abashed as he stretched out on the opposite side of the bed. “I’m sorry for snapping back there,” he said. “It’s just… the guys have been making fun of me for the past few days and it gets old fast.”

“I understand, it's okay,” you nodded, as you watched his silhouette shift closer to you in the dark.

He gave you a considering look. “It’s just… I told them something personal and they couldn’t just leave it alone. Honestly, this whole weekend has been sort of a set up.”

You rolled over to look at him properly as everything began to fall into place. Frank and Gerard’s insistence that you should stay the night, Frank’s “clumsiness,” Gerard’s helpful suggestions, the general feeling that something was going on behind the scenes…

“Oh,” you said, hoping he would confirm your suspicions, “what do you mean?”

“Well, it’s just that,” for a moment, it seemed like the endearing shyness of the Mikey you had met in Gerard’s basement was back. “Okay, like.” He took a steadying breath. “I’m working on building my confidence, so I’m gonna tell you this and hope for this best. I’ve… had a thing for you for a while, if it wasn’t already obvious. I mean, at first, it was just a crush… but as the years went on, and I- we grew up, I’ve realized it’s more than that. I know I’m still working on being stable, but I want to take that chance with you. I mean, if you feel the same way of course.” He paused. “Wow, that was a weight off my chest.”

You stared at him, opening your mouth to speak and then closing it as you parsed your thoughts. You had always felt a certain fondness for Mikey, and the past day had shown you that, over the course of a few years, it had grown into something more than friendship. You couldn’t deny that you also had feelings towards Mikey, and that seeing his new-found confidence and sense of self had only solidified them.

“Um, you’re not like, pissed, are you?”

His timid question snapped you out of your reverie.

“No, of course not!” you rushed to assure him. “I… I feel the same way, Mikey. I think I always have.”

“Oh!” He couldn’t keep the small grin off of his face. “So then I guess you don’t mind if I do this then, right?” He moved in closer to you and wrapped his free arm around your waist, effectively pulling you into his chest.

You smiled, warm with the feeling that things had finally fallen into place. “Good guess,” you sighed, already beginning to fall asleep.

“One more thing,” Mikey paused.

“Hm?”

“Under no circumstances can the others know that their evil plan worked.” “Deal.”

[sadviper]

2020 Creator Wrap: Favorite Works

Rules: It’s time to love yourselves! Choose your 5 (or so) favorite works you created in the past year (fics, art, edits, etc.) and link them below to reflect on the amazing things you brought into the world in 2020. Tag as many writers/artists/etc. as you want (fan or original) so we can spread the love and link each other to awesome works!

Succumbing to peer pressure, haha, thank you @rain-hat, @smylealong, @ibelongtomousse, @macgyver-sheriff, @avauntus for tagging me~

It seems the common refrain is that this was the year everyone exploded into massive creative productivity after years of nothing, which is the exact same story for myself. I had read all the strategies of course: write 5 min a day, 1 sketch a day, don’t think about quality, do *something* just to keep the spark alive, etc etc, but it just got worse and worse. Honestly, I had been feeling so dire about it that I had made up my mind to stop trying anymore, because it was so depressing to try and fail so many times that it was much better to not hope at all.

Buuuuut.....then quarantine and telework happened, and woooah, guess what, all I needed was LOTS of time and space to myself where I’m not wasting it in an office checking emails and doing random training to fill all the downtime!!!

Much thanks to the serendipity that had me stumbling into @rain-hat , reading her early JY/KSR fics, and her encouraging me to go ahead and write that office yearly budget oneshot for TKEM (who writes BUDGET fics?? Who reads them???? lol). That’s not in my list here because it was very new and awkward, it was definitely the ball that got everything rolling.

Cut for super long-winded rambling:

1) Before There Was Zero (TKEM)

This was my first big fanfic in my life, and my most popular, and it absolutely gushed out of me in this massive torrent of *I MUST WRITE* where I would walk around at lunchtime giggling to myself, and type on my phone as I went, or wake up at 1am to scrawl something in a notebook in the dark because I couldn’t stop the words from coming. (How I miss that feeling now! ;__;) Actually, it also is the 2nd fully complete long-form story I had ever completed as well, so...lots of milestones here.

Looking back, it clearly was the product of my years of bottled up silence, where I stewed and dragged myself to the office every day wondering if I was going to calcify in a bureaucracy for the rest of my life (yes). But even as an office drone, I learned a lot of valuable lessons in how to manage, what leadership actually is at the worker bee level, the types of games white-collar workers play, and how to be a decent co-worker (and by extension, a decent human being--I don’t believe it’s possible to separate work life and private life. All your personas are you). It wasn’t all a waste after all!

Somehow I connected my day-to-day to the faceless, long-suffering Royal guardsmen in TKEM, headed by the utterly gorgeous, devastating, thoroughly underutilized, comedic prop military action star Jo Yeong, and thought--yeah! :D

2) Nil Desperandum (TKEM)

My biggest fic by far, full novel length at this point, massive in scope, I don’t even know how I came up with it based on the 10 collective seconds of screen time that Jeong Tae-ra and tyrant Jin got as a joke, but I was clearly still on that dam-gushing-pent-up-creative-high because this idea was fighting me when I was in the middle of writing “Before There Was Zero”.

I actually figured out the title while watching “Call the Midwives” where one of the peppy, indefatigable British nurses said to never despair, and I thought, yes, that’s it. All the horrible things I put my tyrantverse characters through, it was only so that when I save them at the end, it will be completely worth it. It’s a bit more violent (nothing beyond My Country levels tho) and quite emotionally dark, but I also tried to inject a lot of friendship, humor, and love into it as well, because there must always be hope.

For My Country fandom friends who didn’t realize, the tyrant!Yeong in this fic is essentially modernAU!Seon-ho, and I lifted Sung-rok entirely from My Country to be tyrant!Yeong’s second-in-command and loyal-superstar-extraordinaire. Writing them in this modern AU, and seeing the positive reception to Sung-rok’s grouchy, dogged devotion was the start of my love spiral for Sung-rok. <3 <3

3) The Veritable Records of King Taejo (My Country)

Going to cheat and lump 3 fics (soon to be 4) into one link. I rested a little bit after “Nil Desperandum” because I had completely emptied myself out at that point, just a husk of an author shell. Then I started poking out oneshots! Each one got progressively harder to write, lol, the creative gas tank was running out of juice, so I had to really start figuring out new strategies as a writer to keep going. One magic tool was coercing recruiting @rain-hat to beta for me, and WOW, THE BEST???? Who would’ve thought it’d be FUN to be edited!!! <3 Due to her efforts, I could avoid the “no beta we die like Liaodong” tag, hahaha.

I grew up watching cop shows, lawyer shows, monster-of-the-day shows, endless procedurals-- so I was super miffed that the drama would imply that Seon-ho spent YEARS just single-mindedly chasing private armies??! No! I want more family and friends development for this sad, dramatic whump child! I want him to be smarter than the show, inherently brilliant despite the stupid he descends into, and be recognized as such by the people who do recognize his value! And I want them all to be happy with no pointless death!

Also, the 4th WIP is now a Sung-rok lovefest written as an ode to his awesomeness, has stretched to 47K+ words, and is being an absolute royal pain to finish. ;__; All the ease and creative fervor from earlier? GONE. I’m a lone salmon flopping upstream on a ladder. I might get eaten before I finish laying my eggs. Any one have tips to get over this?

4) First Translation of Woo Do Hwan Japanese Interviews

More firsts! So much thanks to @ibelongtomousse to inspiring and encouraging me to do some real translating after talking to her about her sublime TKEM fics and translations thereof, and @staidwaters from emerging from the Internet depths to boost/correct my neophyte efforts! I’m now chomping at the bit to do more, even though I may ultimately discover that these interviews have absolutely nothing interesting to say, lol. But my first priority is simply to get better at the language, and 2nd priority is to soak in the words (and photos) of Woo Do Hwan, hahahah. Also, as far as I can tell, no one is filling this niche, so I guess I’ll keep going??

5) Fanart!

I started drawing again! As a procrastination tactic from writing oneshots, but it still was really nice to see that I hadn’t lost the touch entirely. I feel like I’ve mentioned this here and there, but writing wasn’t my first interest--drawing was. Animals first, then people once I discovered anime/manga. I went all into drawing comics, only to face the hard reality that I didn’t know how to tell a story end-to-end. Hence how I started trying to write. Along the way, things happened--I got RSI and had to stop drawing/writing for awhile. I discovered that pictures are NOT worth a thousand words, esp when it comes to long-form comics; my preferred tools of trade (dip pens) ended up exacerbating my RSI problems; then once I got a handle on my RSI, I found I could type faster than I can ever draw, and so here I am. I saw what @convenientalias was doing with their My Country werewolf fic though, so I am excited to try that for my Sung-rok WIP? :D

I think I’m the last hold out among artist/writer friends in answering this wrap-up, hope you enjoyed reading!

[auroreswritings]

Day 6! The prompt I chose for today is Ritual, although there’s a bit of candle and demon stuff going on. I’m proud I managed to get it out today, the universe has been trying to prevent me to work in this, but I managed and here it is, on time!!

It’s pretty graphic, rated M on AO3 for violence, there’s some kind of torture happening at some point. The story revolves around serial murders. Definitely not something that anyone can read.

Actually came up with my own character, an ability user based on a famous writer, I won’t be saying anything more or it’d spoil the story a little. It was fun to think about a new ability, from choosing the name to deciding how it works, I’d love to do more of that in the future!

Now, without further delay, please enjoy!

Meurtres en Série

              It was the fourth murder this month. The modus operandi was always the same: a circle painted in black was adorned with several red-painted alchemical symbols, black candles were positioned around the circle at each cardinal point and right in its center was placed the naked, hardly recognizable body. On their foreheads were always the same letters, traced with the victim’s own blood: AC. The bodies were always found on a Saturday, with a time of death always estimated between 12AM and 3AM on that same day.

              This was Atsushi’s first serial murder case. He and Dazai were currently assisting the police; they suspected the murderer to be a particularly vicious ability user, and Dazai’s connections with the underground could prove useful. As usual, the crime scene was particularly nasty, and Atsushi was feeling sick to his stomach from the smells and the sight before him. This investigation was starting to take its toll on him: he wanted to offer justice to the victims for their gruesome death, but as the body count went up, the clues and leads went down. No similar cases had ever been recorded, even in other countries: Ango, who was also on the case, had asked around official ability users’ agencies all over the globe, but to no avail. No one had ever heard of such murder methods, and even the letters AC weren’t revealing their secrets. To top it all, the victims had nothing in common, all of different ages, sex, social classes. No link had been established between any of them; it seemed they were just unlucky enough to be in the wrong place at the wrong time, coming across the killer as he was looking for his next prey.

              Atsushi and Dazai were being filled in on the details of this new murder, the younger man trying to keep his eyes away from the corpse as much as possible. After their talk with the officers, Dazai went to take a peek at the body and examine the scene for himself while Atsushi walked away to the poor man who had found the body this time. He was a simple construction worker, and had found the corpse when he had arrived at his machineries’ parking lot this morning, hidden away behind a dump truck. The weretiger sat with him, drinking tea and asking the man a few complementary questions while waiting for his partner.

              Once Dazai was done, they went back to the agency, in silence. Atsushi could see that Dazai was deep in thoughts, his usual playful-self long gone since the case had started to drag on. They were both worried and stressed from this investigation; the younger man could guess that his mentor was in the same lost state has he was himself, which he had never seen happen before. This whole case felt like a disaster, and for it to be Atsushi’s first brush with a serial killer was demeaning. He had wanted to prove himself so much, and there he was now, completely defeated and unsure of what would happen next.

              Back at the office, the two men went straight for the white board displaying all the information they had on the case and added the new ones they gathered today. Headshot photos of the victims were displayed along with pictures of the crime scenes, important facts on their lives summarized under them. A detailed description of the murderer’s modus operandi was written on the left-hand side of the board, while a map of Yokohama with the location of the homicides was fixed on the other side. Atsushi started putting the new photos up while Dazai had his eyes on the map, searching the exact building this morning’s killing at taken place at. As he circled the location with a red marker, his hand stopped halfway, his body noticeably tensing. Atsushi, sensing the change in his mentor’s attitude, turned his head to him with slight curiosity. His eyes were scrutinizing the taller man’s face. His expression had completely shifted from what it was earlier. His gaze was glinting with new found determination and a smug smirk was twisting the corners of his mouth. Without a single word, Dazai finished his circle on the map and looked back at Atsushi; a cryptic aura was surrounding him. The weretiger knew exactly what this meant: the man had cracked the case, or at least found something significant that could help them finally catch the criminal they were after.

              “-My dear Atsushi, I know where the next murder will take place.”

                A week had passed, and the two detectives were now ready to confront the culprit. The plan was simple: get to the location of the next killing and catch the assassin before he could attack his next victim. Dazai hadn’t said much about his findings, only that the locations of the murders were forming a pentagram, the fifth one they would prevent today being the final corner of the shape. Atsushi didn’t have a real idea of how they would catch the killer, but Dazai seemed to have a plan, and he trusted him.

              They arrived at the abandoned warehouse on the harbor. The sun had set some time ago; murder hour was approaching. The area was already pretty quiet and, unbeknownst to Atsushi, Dazai had made sure the police had evacuated all the streets and buildings around, insuring there wouldn’t be unnecessary victims. He had asked Atsushi to patrol on the western and southern sides of the building, close to the entrance, and to pretend he was a worker hanging around the docks as to not arouse suspicion. Dazai was to watch the east and north parts of the area. Everything was calm, only the sound of the ocean waves nearby was breaking the silence, bringing a false sense of peace. Atsushi was pacing around, not really sure how to look like he belonged here but trying hard nonetheless. They had been waiting for a couple hours now, it was nearing 1AM. The late hour was starting to make him nervous. He didn’t want to doubt Dazai, as he knew the man had a great mind, but he couldn’t help but think that maybe, just maybe, they were at the wrong location and they wouldn’t be able to stop the killer tonight. He didn’t know if he could handle seeing another disfigured corpse. As these dark anxieties were gnawing at his mind, the temperature around seemed to lower a little. Atsushi shivered, the cold and his apprehensions crawling through his body. He let out a sigh and cleared his throat, rubbing his hands together.

              Without a single noise, a hand suddenly reached out of the dark and landed on his nose, rough piece of cloth clogging his nostrils. The acrid smell coming from it immediately burnt Atsushi’s insides. A strong arm wrapped around his neck, and he tried to rip it away from him, without success. He struggled with his attacker for some time, but they were stronger than him. As the awful smell filled in his lungs, Atsushi’s vision was blurring. He could feel his strength leaving him slowly, his mind unable to focus, his eyes closing on their own. As much as he tried to fight, he soon blacked out.

                The first thing he felt was the sharp, needle-like pain in his head. He tried to grab it in his hands, but his muscles were hardly answering, limbs sluggish and aching. The second thing he felt was the strong urge to vomit. It felt as though his body was spinning around in the air, yet he could feel the cold, sturdy ground under him. Laboriously, he managed to lie on his side instead of his back, trying to breath as deeply as he could to avoid being sick. He finally managed to open his eyes, and the sight in front of him chilled him to the bones. He was inside a dark, unknown building, the only light coming from the streetlamps outside. On the floor all around him was traced what looked like a circle, strange signs painted in red surrounding his head and body. He knew exactly what this was: he was about to become the serial killer’s fifth victim. The candles had yet to be lit, he was still unharmed as far as he could tell and his forehead was clear of any marking. As his fingers were grazing his face, a hoarse voice erupted from an unlit corner of the room:

              “-You have woken up at last. Welcome to the sacrifice, boy.”

              Atsushi stirred frantically, trying get up. His body still felt heavy, he could hardly curl his knees, even less lift his chest up.

              “-Now, there is absolutely no need to move, boy. See, the circle you are finding yourself in, it has some… let us call them proprieties, shall we? One of these proprieties is to keep you from running away. You should not even be able to raise your little finger; you must be incredibly strong to move this much…” A wicked laugh followed. “To think I found such a powerful offering for You, my Master…” The evil laughter started again.

              The weretiger could feel panic rising inside of him. What could he possibly do? He let out a muffled groan; even his voice seemed to be restrained. The voice resounded again:

              “-You cannot speak either, at least for now. My Master does not appreciate unnecessary talking. Do not fret! You shall find your voice back soon enough. As soon as we get started actually. He may not enjoy futile babbling, but screams of agony are a delight to His ears.” A sinister chuckle followed this statement.

              What was Dazai doing? Had he been caught too? Atsushi’s mind was racing, trying to think of anything that could help him. Hopefully his mentor would show up soon, he was his last resort now. As Atsushi was trying to send telepathic messages to the older man, heavy steps resounded through the warehouse. They were approaching the poor man on the ground, slowly. Turning his head to the sound, Atsushi could see the silhouette of the man appearing in a puddle of light coming in from a window. He was wearing a maroon three-piece with a white shirt underneath, dark brown oxford shoes on his feet. Around his neck was a bow tie, cream with dark red flowers. A gold chain was slinging from a pocket of his waistcoat, a cream pocket square was tucked in the pocket of his jacket. His face became more and more visible as he walked into the light. He was a rather young man, a little older than Atsushi. A crazy mop of brown hair was hanging over grenadine eyes. His traits were delicate, a staggering contrast with the rough voice that shot out his rosy lips:

              “-Alright, boy, let us start!” He stepped around the circle, taking in the sight of Atsushi lying there, unable to move. After having walked around three times, he went back into the darkness, only to come out again a second later, holding a single black candle. He paced around Atsushi again while lighting the candle up before setting it down at the young man’s feet. He started chanting in a powerful voice:

              “-I, Aleister Crowley, offer You, King Baal, this dark light shining upon the southern side of your kingdom. May this fire open the Gates and lead the infidels Your way.” As he finished his sentence, an intense pain took over Atsushi’s entire body. It felt as if a thousand knives were reaping his skin open. He let out an agonizing scream, his voice acute, distorted by his suffering.

              His vision went white, he couldn’t hear a single thing, not even his own voice. The only thing he knew now was excruciating pain. After some time, its intensity decreased a little. Atsushi took a breath in; he was panting, his head spinning from the recent torture. Every single cell in his body felt like it had been lit on fire. He felt a few tears escaping his eyes.

              “-Yes, cry for Him, boy, let Him know how you feel!” The crazed voice erupted again. Atsushi looked at the man standing at his feet. His face was twisted with a vicious smirk, eyes glinting with pleasure and madness. The poor tiger tried to reply but his erratic breathing would not let him do so. His eyes were shooting daggers at this Aleister. Please Dazai, hurry up!

              The man moved around him again, three times. He reached for a second candle, placing it on Atsushi’s left. The weretiger tried to prepare himself for what he knew was coming as the man chanted again:

              “-I, Aleister Crowley, offer You, King Baal, this dark light shining upon the eastern side of your kingdom. May this fire open the Gates and enlighten the infidels with Your wisdom.” Once again, Atsushi’s body was assaulted with pain.

              His insides were on fire, lava was coursing through his veins. His brain was blank, unable to form a single thought as the awful feelings were tormenting him. More time seemed to have passed before the sensations calmed down again, leaving him panting even harder. His lungs were hurting, but he needed air, and he gulped down as much as he could. Rivers of tears were falling from his eyes, whimpers involuntarily escaping his mouth. The man standing above him seemed to relish in his weary moans. The crazy glow in his eyes had intensified. For the third time, he circled around Atsushi, and for the third time, he placed a candle on the floor.

              “-I, Aleister Crowley, offer You, King Baal, this dark light shining upon the western side of your kingdom. May this fire open the Gates and…”

              “-Let’s stop it all here!” Dazai’s voice boomed through the room. The vicious man turned his head towards the entrance, trying to see who had interrupted him. At the sound, Atsushi felt a wave of relief flow through his body. Dazai had come, he was safe now.

              “-Hey, you stylish tormenter! The police have surrounded the area! Give yourself up now and we won’t have to be forceful!” Aleister let out a scoff.

              “-Who dares interrupting my sacrifice? I shall inform you that there is no way in stopping this. Is this boy your little friend? He will die tonight, whether you fancy it or not. Now, where was I? Oh, yes… I, Aleister Crowley, offer You, King Baal…” The man suddenly went flying to the side.

              Dazai was standing there, rubbing his fist. Atsushi could feel the hold of the circle casted around him loosen. Hard steps could be heard behind his mentor, and soon they were all surrounded by a dozen officers in tactical gear. Ango was trailing behind them.

              “-Do not touch him! We don’t know how his ability works.” He turned his head to his old friend. “Dazai, could you…?

              “-But of course, my dear Ango.” Dazai approached the man on the floor, but before he could touch him, the man yelled:

              “-Goetia of Solomon the King.” As the words rose in the air, the circle under Atsushi started glowing, purple and red hues casting long shadows all around. Atsushi’s torments came back again, this time with even more intensity. He let out a long, terrified and pained scream. His face was distorted, his skin breaking, his organs imploding under the spell he was put under. His arms were stretched towards Dazai; the last thing he saw was the man’s horrified expression, his name leaving his lips in a panicked cry.

                He blinked a few times, trying to get used to the bright light blinding him. The sheets covering him were soft against his skin, the mattress under him comfortable. Atsushi felt at peace. His body was sore, but he was no longer in pain. After getting accustomed to the brightness, he realized he was at the agency’s infirmary. He propped himself up on his elbows, looking around. Nobody in sight. He tried to call out for Yosano, but his voice wouldn’t rise higher than a whisper. He laid back down, waiting for someone to come to him. After about ten minutes, Yosano entered, followed by Dazai. Realizing the tiger had woken up, they rushed to his side. The young doctor started inspecting him.

              “-Atsushi, you’ve disappointed me again! Your ability had already done a good enough job before you came to me, and Dazai forbade me to try anything to heal you myself!” She smiled warmly at him, relieved by the current state of her young friend. Atsushi smiled back at her, apologizing on behalf of the tiger. He then turned to Dazai.

              “-How did I end up here? The last things I remember are the strange light and the pain…

              -Apparently, there were a few different steps in Crowley’s ability. Luckily, he hadn’t completed the entire ritual before launching the final stage, otherwise…” His voice trailed, letting Atsushi imagine what could have happened to him. A shiver went down his spine. His mentor smiled at him softly and continued, “It seems like the man can summon different powerful entities through his ability. They could potentially destroy entire cities, but necessitate several sacrifices to work. We’ve barely avoided a catastrophe.

              -Where is he now?

              -The Special Ability Department is taking care of him. He should be locked up for some time.” Atsushi let out a relieved sigh at the news. The case was over now; there wouldn’t be any more victims.

              Yosano, having just finished Atsushi’s checkup, walked out of the room, leaving the tiger and his mentor alone. As she did so, Dazai covered Atsushi’s hand on the bed with his. His head was down, hair falling over his eyes. His voice was a little chocked when he spoke up.

              “-Atsushi… I’m so sorry, I wasn’t intending for things to go this far. The police took so long to dispatch… You shouldn’t have gone through all this pain… I’m sorry…” His voice broke.

              Atsushi raised his other hand to Dazai’s head, ruffling his hair a little, smooth strands tangling around his fingers.

              “-It’s okay, Dazai, things don’t always go as planned. I’m just glad I’m still alive.” His voice was just a whisper, but his tone was full of kindness. He kept patting the man’s head for a while. Dazai eventually looked up at him, gentle smile illuminating his face.

[gwilymay]

beer bottle blues ➳ (one-sided Brian May x OC)

❅ a "spin the bottle" au of @benhaardy 's "pretty girl" fic - Iris is not my OC!

warnings: one or two instances of swearing, suggestive language, smoking and drinking (lol idk)

word count: 1.7k

A/N: I was reading my old fics trying to get ideas and I as I read the last thing I wrote about a year ago, it reminded me a lot of my friend's (tagged above) fic. so to start out writing again, I decided to kinda rewrite the older fic into this newer one as an au of her fic. I mostly wrote this at 1am and I barely edited - enjoy, hopefully it doesn't suck too bad... the title is already bad lmaooo

also, if you don't know who the oc is, her bg, etc., it won't matter too much but if you want to read more of her go to the tagged user above!

→

“Thank you,” Deacy finished his speech with a raise of his glass. He smiled and motioned to Brian, who was due to read next. “And now, if you’ll have Brian May continue on telling you another part of the story.”

Everyone clapped and cheered loudly. Brian took the mic from Deacy and waved to the guests. “Uh, good evening!” He cleared his throat and took a deep breath. He caught Iris’s eye, then Roger’s, and as the memories flooded into his thoughts, the words left his tongue.

⇜

“Ok darlings, we leave tomorrow! Let’s make the most out of now, shall we?” Freddie exclaimed, his band mates filing in through the door.

“I don't even get why you have to leave. Why not just record back at the old studio?” Iris asked Brian as they walked into the living room. They sat on the couch, and Brian took his hands in hers. “I’m sorry, love. Our deal with that studio ended, and besides, Freddie wants time away for some ‘inner peace’.” He squeezed her hands. “Don't worry - Mary will keep you company. You’ll both be missing our kisses, I’m sure,” he joked.

Iris gave a sad smile. “It's just… I’ll miss you so much.” Brian knew she was sincere, but for a second, she glanced at Roger, and her eyes betrayed her deeper thoughts.

Of course.

Before Brian could comfort her, to prove that he was better than Roger, that he could be everything she ever wanted, Romeo jumped up and nuzzled Iris, who smiled and lovingly stroked his fur, letting go of Brian’s hands. Brian internally sighed. It seemed as if, as hard as he tried, he could never replace Roger for Iris.

He leaned back into the couch, silently contemplating. Deacy ventured into the kitchen and returned with an unopened beer bottle, which Freddie grabbed and downed in a second. After thanking a confused Deacy, Freddie clapped his hands together and sat down elegantly on the floor, placing the bottle down in the middle of the rug. “Come, sit with me, my darlings!” Everyone followed, Iris being last. Brian held her hand - he knew she was worried. Iris just stared at nothing in particular, a blank expression on her face. Brian gently squeezed her hand again, snapping her out of her haze. She looked up at him and smiled, but he could tell something was wrong. She wasn't usually like this - the Iris he knew years ago was loud, sarcastic, badass. The Iris now… she was quiet and sad, and always lost in thought. Whenever she was asked if something was up, she’d dismiss it and say she was “just tired.

But he knew it was probably about Roger.

Brian couldn’t forget about their past feelings for each other - none of their friends could. Roger made her laugh and cry, made her love her life then hate herself again and again. Brian even thought she still loved him.

Iris leaned her head on his shoulder, and Brian made himself push his thoughts away. He had to be strong, even when she wasn't. For Iris. For them.

“Everyone ready?” Freddie asked. “Ok, who wants to go first?”

Deacy raised his hand. “Um, what exactly are we doing?” Freddie looked at him with his “are-you-serious” expression on his face. “What a stupid question. What does it look like?”

Everyone blinked. Freddie sighed. “It’s spin the bottle, you pricks, and whoever you spin on has to spend seven minutes in a room with you. Now I’m asking, who wants to go first?”

No one moved. Roger looked around the circle, and when he saw that no one else volunteered, of course, he did.

“Calm down Rog, the girls here aren't for you,” Freddie joked, to which Roger rolled his eyes at, “but maybe you can teach Deacy a thing or two.”

Avoiding a swat from Deacy, a grinning Freddie passed the bottle to a glaring Roger, who rubbed his hands together before he spun it. He took one last glance at the whole group, then twisted his hand to spin the bottle.

Brian looked at Iris, who was biting her lip in worry. To her relief, it didn’t land on her.

It landed on Brian.

“Shit,” Brian whispered.

Roger looked up at him, wide-eyed. Mary pursed her lips, trying not to laugh. Freddie jokingly winked at Brian, reached over behind Mary, and slapped Roger on the back, grinning. Deacy just smiled and shook his head. “At least it wasn't me!”

Freddie led the two men to the closet under the stairs and slammed the door shut. Once the door clicked closed, everyone burst into laughter.

“Well…” Roger said awkwardly, shoving his hands into his pockets. Thankfully, though, the closet was a large storage closet that didn’t have much stuff in it. Roger backed up to make more room for the tall Brian, and they both sat on the floor.

“So how’s it been?” Roger asked him, his usual cool expression back on his face. Brian didn't know what to say. He wanted to hate Roger, for causing Iris so much pain, for being so perfect that Iris couldn't give anyone else as much love as she had given him. But alas, there they were, forced to talk in Freddie’s stupid closet for seven whole minutes.

“Brian? You there, mate?” Roger waved a hand in front of Brian’s face to get his attention.

“Oh, uh, sorry.” Brian cleared his thoughts again. “It’s been ok. Iris and I are going to be seperated, with our recording of the new album, though, so that’s a bummer.”

“Aww, you’ll be fine,” Roger exclaimed, patting Brian’s back, his hand lingering there for a moment before coming back down to pull a cigarette out of his pocket. He lit it, placing the other end between his teeth. He leaned back on the wall, chin tilted slightly up as he took a drag. Brian just sat there. “Um… what about you?”

Roger just smiled, small and sly. “Nothing interesting, maybe a few fun nights here and there but other than that, no.” He took another drag.

Brian smiled but shook his head. “Same old Roger,” he teased. He looked back at Roger, whose expression changed. Suddenly Brian regretted what he said. “Sorry. It’s your life. I shouldn't have-” Roger held up his hand, silencing Brian.

To his surprise, Roger wasn't angry. Instead, he had a sad smile on his face, similar to Iris’s earlier. “It’s ok. I know the rest of you think of me that way. And, well you're not wrong.” He let out a long sigh, smoke escaping from his lips. Hesitantly, he continued, “Ever since I broke up with Iris, I’d had nothing. No one. So, I went back to my old habits. Girls, parties, smoking, buncha shit like that.

“I missed her like hell - if I’m being honest, I still do. God, I care for her a lot… A-and I know you’re with her,” he quickly added. “You probably think I hate you, for dating my ex.”

Surprised, Brian started to talk, but Roger shushed him once more. “But… I chose to let her go. I let her go because I knew I couldn't be good for her. I know she hates me. But she’s better off now, right? She’s with you. You're a much better partner for her, someone more reliable, trustworthy, loyal… and I’m glad it was you she decided to love again. So, um, thank you. Take care of her for me. Promise.”

Roger looked up at Brian, with so much sincerity in his eyes that Brian realized he couldn't hate him. He just wanted what was best for Iris. They both did.

Brian opened his mouth to say something, to tell him thank you, that yes, he would take care of Iris, but the door burst open and Freddie walked in. “Alright darlings, it’s been seven minutes!”

Roger got up first, smoothing down his shirt as if the last seven minutes didn't happen. Brian absentmindedly followed suit, lost in thought. During the questionably long walk through Freddie’s house from the closet to the living room, Brian tried to make sense of what Roger had told him. Was it true? Or was Roger just messing with him? Is he really that big of an asshole? To admit that he still cared for his ex, but also made Brian promise to take care for her instead of him, made Brian feel even more guilty for hating Roger.

Then as quickly as he processed everything, they were back in the living room.

Brian’s eyes immediately darted to Iris, who was staring at something behind him.

It was, of course, Roger.

Trying to forget everything running through his head, Brian sat down next to Iris. He managed to whisper a “Hey, love,” before Freddie’s voice filled the room once more, picking Deacy as the bottle’s next victim.

As Deacy span the bottle, Brian looked back at Roger, who was also looking at Iris, pain visible in his eyes. Suddenly, Roger looked up at Brian, and after a long, seeming endless sad gaze, looked back down at the bottle.

And Brian knew what he had to do.

⇝

Brian snapped back to the present. He felt painful tears in his eyes, but blinked them away quickly as he told the audience about the party and how Iris and Roger fell in love again after years of being apart, not even mentioning his history with Iris.

Because he didn’t want them to know the truth. An important turn in their lives - maybe even the most important - that led to everything that happened after that party. As he finished, handed Freddie the mic, and sat down, he decided to reflect on what really happened.

⇜

Not knowing that Brian was observing her, Iris kept glancing at Roger fricken Taylor, the person who captured and broke Iris’s heart, leaving Brian with small remnants of what was once there.

She still loved him. He could see it in her eyes. She looked like a teenager again. Iris Marchesi, the broken girl whose first love left her behind. Iris Marchesi, whose feelings never faded away.

And neither did Roger’s.

And that’s something Roger would have to tell her himself.

But for that to happen, Brian would have to let go of Iris.

And because he loved her, more than she would ever love him, he did.

He let her go.

←

A/N: yikes um i'm sorry if this sucked and barely had a plot pls don’t bully me

[blackpinkstories]

Two Idols

Lisa Manoban x Reader

Part: 1/4

About: Your best friend Jisoo Kim auditions for YG Entertainment. Once she makes it she never messages you again. Your dream in life is also to become a singer and you try to achieve it by using YouTube and uploading covers. You forget how much you miss Jisoo until you see her at an awards ceremony. When you reconnect at the awards, you meet Lisa. (You’re gay in this story)

Jisoo and Y/N lay on Y/N’s talking about their dreams. Both girls, ever since they were young, have wanted to become singers. Jisoo wanted to be a famous pop singer whereas Y/N wanted to write her own songs with her guitar and tour the world.

“My YouTube channel has 1000 subscribers now and the cover of Loser by BIGBANG has gotten nearly 300,000 views. It’s insane.” Y/N said, scrolling through her YouTube on her phone.

“That’s crazy” Jisoo said, laying next to her, watching what she was doing.

When Jisoo and Y/N were young children, they would sing their hearts out on a beaten up kareoke box Jisoo had been given as a birthday present from Y/N. It didn’t sound the best but it provided them with years of entertainment.

“Y/N! Y/N!” Jisoo yelled, running through the school corridor to reach her best friend.

“Look! This morning I saw on YG’s website that they’re holding auditions in Korea in two months. I signed up instantly and I’m waiting on a reply now. I’m scared! It’s YG! Record company of BIG BANG!” Jisoo said, very quickly as she was so excited.

“Jisoo that’s so great!” Y/N squealed with her best friend. “What do you need to do?” Y/N asked. “I’m not sure yet. They’re going to email me soon. They’re holding 1000 auditions so hopefully I’ll be in time.” Jisoo said, nervous already.

That lunch time, Y/N and Jisoo found an empty classroom to brainstorm. “YG emailed me duing third period. Here it is.” Jisoo turned her laptop screen toward Y/N so she could read.

‘Dear Kim Jisoo,

Thank you for your application. We are delighted to inform you that you have an audition at the YG Entertainment Building on the 26th September. To the audition please be prepared with a dance to any song you like, an original song and you’ll be asked to sing a section of a song you won’t have prepared for. We look forward to seeing you.’

Y/N squealed excitedly before getting in her musical zone. “You can help me write the original song because you’re so good at it! Please Y/N?” Jisoo asked hopefully. “Of course I’ll help you. What kind of song do you want it to be?” Y/N asked, getting out her pen and notebook out of her bag to take down ideas. “I was thinking of a love song, with a twist to make it indivial. I want it to show off my vocals.” Jisoo said, thinking intently. Y/N wrote it down quickly as the bell rang for their next and final class of the day. “I’ll think tonight and I’ll let you know what I have tomorrow and we can adapt and add. See ya!” Y/N said before disappearing down the corridor to her next lesson.

That evening, Y/N sat at her computer with her microphone set up, ready to sing if creativity struck. She had scribbled down many words and chord patterns but she was yet to find one she was satisfied with. Y/N nor Jisoo had any experience in love so she was trying to be poetic but she felt it was becoming too cringe, which she didn’t want for Jisoo. Suddenly, a bright idea popped into Y/N’s head and her pen was flying. Words and notes were being written down so fast, the pen wasn’t far from breaking. Y/N began to record what was in her head with her guitar and her own singing voice. ‘I think I have something. Come over if you can’ Y/N text Jisoo, hoping she would come despite it being 11pm. In ten minutes, there was a knock on the door and Jisoo stood there impatiently. Both girls hurried upstairs and Y/N made Jisoo sit and listen to the recording.

“This is incredible Y/N.” Jisoo said, placing the headphones on the table. “We can change it to however you want as it’s only the first demo.” Y/N said, happy with her work for once. “No, no. I want to sing it exactly like this. It’s perfect. The lyrics aren’t too cliche and it’s melodic too. You’re a genius.” Jisoo said. Y/N and Jisoo switched some lyrics around and changed the end but after that, Jisoo was so excited to record she couldn’t wait the next day so at 1am on a very early Saturday morning, Y/N’s room was filled with Jisoo’s honey-like voice.

The sun had risen and it was 7am, but Jisoo and Y/N finally found the perfect take. They were both tired and once they had finished, instantly they laid down and fell asleep.

The next two months went extremely fast. Jisoo sang their song everyday to make sure it was engrained in her head. She had the song on a disc and she had an instrumental version that she could sing along too as she doubted Y/N could come with her to the audition just to play guitar. Jisoo had gotten advice from their schools dance teacher and perfected her dance to a song she loved. The audition day arrived and Y/N was getting ready with Jisoo before she would drive her to audition.

“Don’t wait outside, because I don’t know how long I’ll be or what happens after it. Thank you so much for everything you have done these past two months. With the song and everything too. I can’t believe I’m lucky enough to have someone like you.” Jisoo hugged Y/N before walking into the large glass doors of YG. Y/N felt emotional, and terrified, for Jisoo.

Y/N didn’t hear anything from Jisoo that evening, or the next day, or the next day. She was confused because she had no idea why Jisoo was ignoring her, or where she was. Their friends from school hadn’t heard from her either and Jisoo’s parents refused to answer any of Y/N’s questions. She was lost.

time jump: 2 years later

It had been 2 years since Y/N had last heard from Jisoo. She tried not to think about it too much but it still hurt her. Y/N graduated school, and was spotted by someone from a different record company. She took the deal and started to work on her professional singing and guitar playing. Her dream was finally coming true but her best friend wasn’t there to share it with her.

In the past two years, Y/N had changed a lot. She had finally come to terms with her sexuality and she dressed differently. She acted the same, humble and caring, but she became more confident. Y/N was very happy that her dream was finally beginning to come true, especially as she walked onto a stage where she was about to make her debut as a rising singer.

She gripped the neck of her guitar nervously as a man announced her name. Y/N walked out as confidently as possible and began to play a song she had written long ago, the first original song she ever wrote. Every person at that debut show was going crazy. Phone cameras were out and cheering was heard. Y/N smiled as she had a conversation with the host and gave some simple facts about herself.

When Y/N walked off the stage, she was on a high. Many people approached her and congratulated her as she realised this is what she was born to do.

Jisoo was a trainee at YG Entertainment now. She had met new friends, one being Jennie Kim. She didn’t think about Y/N often, even though she could message her whenever she wanted, she just chose not to because she didn’t want to make Y/N feel bad that she was achieving her dream and Y/N wasn’t. Jisoo felt bad, but it was for the best. At least that’s what she told herself.

“JISOO! We are going to be debuting early! Me, you, Lalisa Manoban and Park Chaeyoung!” Jennie screamed as she ran into their dorm room. Jisoo jumped off her bed and began dancing around with Jennie.

“When?” Jisoo asked.

“5 days from today! We have to begin immediately which is why we have to find Lisa and Chaeyoung. Let’s go!” Jennie dragged Jisoo as they ran through the corridors. Their dreams were starting earlier than they expected!

Jisoo, Lisa, Chaeyoung and Jennie all met in the dance studio where they were immediately thrown into dancing for a song they recorded last week - Whistle. They found the dance hard but at the end of the day they had already completely the first verse.

Y/N was very excited to begin her career. Once people started noticing her, she was busy instantly with promotion of her single and performances on TV shows. She even starred on ‘The Tonight Show’ in the USA, where she announced her first album. She was more than excited to release her first album, but a lot was too be decided. She had to think about the photo book and photo card, the front cover and how she wanted it to sound. Her manager had told her she wouldn’t have long to decide to she sat in a hotel room at a desk, looking through pictures online to give her inspiration. The thought suddenly struck - light and dark. Y/N loved wearing black and it was her favourite shade, and darkness for the photos would be great, and she could have light ones as well. Her songs could be a mixture and she already thought of song ideas that would match. Great!

Jisoo, Jennie, Lisa and Chaeyoung, who had adopted the stage name: Rosé, stood backstage as they were prepared for their debut. One by one, they slowly walked out onto the dark stage as their names were called. They were scared and nervous but they had been waiting for this moment almost their whole lives, and the excitement weighed out any other feeling. “BLACKPINK” was the group name chosen. It felt good to have a name and have people soon saying it, Jisoo thought to herself.

The next month was spent releasing music, for both Y/N and BLACKPINK. Jisoo didn’t pay much attention to the media so she didn’t know about Y/N’s rise to fame, but Y/N knew about Jisoo. She saw her with her members on articles and on social media. Jisoo looked happy. Y/N’s album was released a week prior and it had blown up instantly. It hit #1 in Korea, Japan, Thailand, America and China. Everyone knew who she was, except Jisoo. Jisoo really was in her own world when it came to new music.

The Seoul Music Awards arrived, and Y/N was nominated for many awards, those including the Daesang award, Bonsang award, Record of the year and New artist award. She was against BLACKPINK in two of those, the Daesang award and the New artist award. To say she was nervous would be an understatement. Y/N would be performing in front of many other artists like Red Velvet, BTS, and most importantly, BLACKPINK. BLACKPINK weren’t performing but as Y/N was shown around the large venue, she knew exactly where they would be seated.

Jisoo, Lisa, Jennie and Rosé took their seats at a large table in the hall, where the awards were about to begin. “Who’s performing today?” Jisoo asked Lisa, who had been raving about the performances at the awards over the past few weeks. “BTS, Hyuna, GOT7 and Y/N.” Lisa said, saying Y/N’s name excitedly. “Y/N?” Jisoo asked, her heart dropping. “Yeah, her new album dropped the other month and it’s blown up. We are against her for the Daesang and New artist award. She’s really good, my girl crush.” Lisa said happily. “Do you have a picture of her?” Jisoo asked nervously. “Of course, she’s my home screen actually.” Lisa chuckled embarrassed. She had been obsessing over Y/N ever since her debut and clearly Jisoo hadn’t paid attention. Lisa showed Jisoo the photo on her home screen and Jisoo’s heart beat faster with nerves. Her old best friend was on the screen, smiling at a crowd with a guitar in hand. “What’s wrong unnie?” Lisa asked, locking her phone and placing it on the table. “She’s my old best friend.” Jisoo said. “I stopped talking to her completely, she probably hates me.” Lisa gasped slightly. Their conversation was interrupted by a large booming voice and the host walking out onto stage. Jisoo wasn’t really focusing as she was looking around for Y/N. Just as she turned to her right, she saw her. She sat on a table with Red Velvet and she was laughing about something with Yeri. Y/N looked more mature in her suit, seemingly made by Gucci by the design of it. Jisoo looked back at the stage, scared Y/N would see her.

The awards went fast, and then the first category Y/N was nominated for appeared. Record of the year. Many other amazing albums were nominated, including Red Velvet’s. Y/N joined hands with Yeri and Irene as they all waited, hoping the best for each other but also themselves.

“The winner for record of the year is, Y/N Y/L/N with her debut album.” Y/N stood up and hugged the members of Red Velvet and shook various hands as she walked up to the stage, a huge grin on her face. She took the award graciously, bowing to the host respectively. Y/N gave a small speech before her time ran out and she went and sat back down, placing her award on the table before it was taken away by her manager for safe keeping.

Y/N won the next two awards she was nominated for, the New artist and the Bonsang award. She beat BLACKPINK in the new artist award and saw them sitting here, her eyes settling on Jisoo as they made uncomfortable eye contact. Backstage, Y/N was preparing for her performance. She had changed and her hair had been restyled. Now she was wearing a casual outfit. She had a large shirt tucked into high waisted shorts as it was hot. Simple but Y/N liked it.

“Now, the performance you’ve all been waiting for, Y/N Y/L/N!” The host announced, disappearing from the stage. Y/N began to play her guitar from the side of the stage as the stage was still dark. It lit up slowly as she walked onto the stage with her guitar, singing happily. It was a joyful pop song that showed off Y/N’s vocals as she played her guitar along with the additional backing track. Everyone was going crazy for her as she sang, the hall being filled with people singing wildly. The whole hall erupted in cheer as Y/N ended on a high note. She walked off the stage humbly and went and sat back down, not before passing her guitar to her manager who took it away. The members of Red Velvet congratulated her as she sat down. The whole hall fell silent as they waited for the Daesang, the most prestigious award, to be announced. “This award has many incredible artists nominated, but we can only have one winner. The winner of the Daesang is...”

Everyone waited. BLACKPINK, Seungri, Y/N, BTS and Hyuna were all nominated. “Y/N Y/L/N.” Y/N’s heart stopped as she sat there shocked. She saw her own face on the screen and realised how crazy she looked. Winning the Daesang was something she didn’t expect this early on in her career. BLACKPINK stood up and clapped and everyone followed. Y/N was still in shock as she walked slowly to get the award.

“Wow, thank you so much for this. Thank you for supporting me and buying my album, and listening to it. I can’t believe anything like this would ever happen to me. Not long ago, I was just someone who went to school and wrote songs in their bedroom, but it’s insane that something like this has happened. I’ll forever be grateful to each and every one of you. Thank you.”

Y/N wiped a tear as she walked off to backstage, ready to be interviewed as BTS closed the event with their fantastic performance of Fake Love. She took pictures with other artists like the members of iKON and the many members of NCT. These people all congratulated her and praised her. She was overwhelmed with emotion.

“Y/N!” Lisa called as the rest of BLACKPINK followed. “BLACKPINK! Hi!” Y/N said, hugging them one by one.

“Hi Jisoo.”

“Hi Y/N, congratulations.” Jisoo said. The uncomfortable silence was filled up by Lisa praising Y/N nervously. Y/N stared right into Lisa’s eyes which made her even more nervous.

“Lisa is a huge fan, you’re her girl crush.” Jisoo said, making things less awkward between them. Lisa slapped Jisoo’s arm as Jennie and Rosé laughed. “It’s true. You’re her home screen.” Rosé said as Lisa turned a bright red. “That’s so cool.” Y/N said, laughing at how embarrassed Lisa was. Y/N put her arm round Lisa’s shoulder as Lisa looked like she was going to explode. “Do you guys want to come back to my apartment for our after party? There’s an official after party but ours is better and you guys can stay over if you want as with how drunk everyone’s going to be getting, I don’t think anyone wants to go home after that. Red Velvet are staying so you guys can too.” Y/N said. “That would be great.” Jennie said, hugging Y/N. “It’s starting almost now so just get here whenever you want, I’m about to leave to go so just turn up and you’ll be let in. See you later.” Y/N said before walking off to do one last interview before heading home.

“You guys are so embarrassing.” Lisa said. “But, she’s so hot! Jisoo, how could you not have set us up sooner if you’re best friends.”

“I stopped talking to her.” Jisoo said bluntly. Lisa coughed awkwardly as she felt Jisoo was not in the mood to explain why. “Okay, well let’s go to our hotel and get our overnight bags and then head to hers.”

Back at her apartment, Y/N and everyone there was already drinking and celebrating. Many artists and different people related to the music industry were there enjoying themselves. Yeri and Y/N spoke in the corner to each other, the music being so loud they had to yell in each other’s ears. “You look so beautiful tonight.” Y/N said, making Yeri blush. “So do you.” Yeri said in return, making Y/N grin largely. “Thank you.” Y/N said.

The door opened and Blackpink walked in. They had all changed and they held their bags, which were taken and put into a room that was locked. Lisa instantly spotted Y/N in the corner, and looking at her and Yeri made her jealous. “Hey Yeri, I’ll be back. I’m just going to say hello to my friends.” Y/N said. Lisa slapped Jisoo’s arm as Y/N approached.

“You made it!” Y/N exclaimed. She was slightly tipsy already and it was obvious. “Cool party Y/N.” Jennie said, taking the drink Y/N was offering. “Jisoo, can I talk to you?” Y/N asked. Jisoo nodded nervously as Y/N took her over to the corner privately. “I don’t want things to be awkward. I’m sure you had your reasons for not talking to me and I’m just glad we can reconnect again.” Y/N said, seriously. Even though she was tipsy, her words were coming from a place of love. “I’m so sorry Y/N. I don’t know what I was thinking. You’re the reason this all happened and I just left. I don’t want things to be awkward either.” Jisoo said. Y/N and Jisoo embraced warmly as they rejoined the other members. Lisa was happier now that Y/N returned.

“Make yourselves at home. Go dance, drink, do what you want!” Y/N exclaimed. Jisoo, Rosé and Jennie left to get more drinks but Lisa stayed with Y/N. “You’re pretty.” Y/N said to Lisa, watching the blush creep onto Lisa’s face. Y/N took a liking to Lisa and thought she was so beautiful. Her head was spinning and all she was focusing on was Lisa’s eyes.

Lisa felt her heartbeat speed up. Her favourite celebrity was standing right in front of her complimenting her and she couldn’t believe it. She was starstruck. Lisa had watched Y/N’s interviews and videos and instantly had been drawn to her personality. Now she had the chance to know her due to their careers. It was thrilling. “Let’s dance.” Y/N said, dragging Lisa onto the floor that was cleared to make a dance floor. Lisa was a natural born dancer and Y/N followed her moves. Y/N was watching Lisa intently as her hips swayed to the music. Y/N grabbed Lisa’s hips and pulled her closer. “You’re hot.” Y/N whispered into Lisa’s ear. Lisa again blushed. “So are you.” She whispered back. After this, Lisa needed a drink. She left Y/N to go over to Jennie, who was getting another drink for her, Rosé, Jackson Wang and Kai. They were all chatting and drinking in the corner. “I see you’re getting cosy.” Jennie said, passing Lisa a drink. “It’s a dream Jennie. She’s so hot, it’s painful. She’s playing with my heart I swear.” Lisa laughed. She saw Y/N talking to Yeri again and she instantly got jealous. Jennie laughed. “If you stare at Yeri like that any longer she’ll burst into flames. Is Y/N gay?” Jennie asked. “I’m not sure. I’ll ask Jisoo. She keeps calling me hot so I hope so but I don’t know.” Lisa said. What if Y/N wasn’t gay?

“Jisoo unnie! I have a question for you. Is Y/N gay?”

“She is. It was always a secret and she was never happy with herself but I think she’s come to terms with it now. I’m not sure.” Jisoo said.

“Thank you.” Lisa said. She scanned the room to find Y/N. She couldn’t find her until she saw her being pressed against the wall by Yeri. Yeri whispered something in Y/N’s ear which made Y/N smile. Yeri leant into Y/N’s neck and kissed it, which made Y/N smile. Lisa’s eyes narrowed and confidence overtook her. Lisa stomped over to Y/N and Yeri and pulled Y/N’s hand. Yeri stepped back shocked but they barely had anytime to react before Lisa had pulled her away and dragged her across the room. She pressed her against the wall and her eyes were dark and narrow. “Don’t do that.” Lisa said, staring into Y/N’s eyes. “What?” Y/N asked. “Don’t tease me. You know what I’m talking about. Yeri.” “You’re jealous!” “So what if I am?” Lisa asked. Before she knew it, Y/N had leaned forward and kissed Lisa. She grabbed her by the waist and pulled her closer. Lisa’s head was exploding.

The party continued and more people left. Y/N and Lisa were inseparable. Everyone was beginning to sober up by the end and at 2am, the only people left were Red Velvet, Blackpink and Y/N. They sat in the living room, which had been closed off due to the expensive couch and rug. “Thank you for a great night Y/N.” Irene said. “We better be off to bed. We have a show tomorrow night.” Irene, being the leader, made sure her members were not tired for their performances. “Goodnight guys.” Y/N said as they all left. Yeri, Irene and Seugli were in one room, and Joy and Wendy in another.

“Did you enjoy yourselves?” Y/N asked Blackpink. “It was so fun.” Rosé said. “I agree.” Lisa said. “I wonder why you found it so fun.” Jennie teased. Y/N laughed as Lisa turned red, once again. Y/N’s arm was around Lisa so Lisa turned her head into Y/N’s shoulder whilst laughing so the other members couldn’t see her bashful expression. They all laughed at how embarrassed Lisa got. “For rooms, there can be two of you in one, and three in the other, including me. Or, I can go alone and you two can share, and you two.” After much discussion, Jennie and Lisa stayed in one room, Jisoo and Rosé stayed in another and Y/N slept in her own room. They all said their goodnights before disappearing to their selective rooms. “You like her a lot don’t you?” Jennie asked Lisa as she left the bathroom, cleaning her teeth. “I do. She’s been my celebrity crush since her debut and knowing her today has just made it worse.” “She seems to like you back though, she kissed you after all.” Jennie said. Lisa smiled at the thought. “Go say goodnight to her. Turn right and three doors down is her room.” Jennie said. Lisa immediately left and followed Jennie’s instruction. Y/N’s door was open and Lisa stood at the door into her room. She had guitars lined up on the wall and a big microphone attached to the wall, with two big computers on a large desk. Her bed was huge and her duvets were white with sheep on it. Cute. Y/N was sitting at her desk with her back to the door strumming her guitar softly. Lisa knocked lightly and Y/N span around in her chair. “Hey, is everything okay?” Y/N asked. Lisa walked into her room and sat on her bed. “I just came to say goodnight, and to thank you again.” Lisa said. Y/N put her guitar back against the wall and sat next to Lisa on her bed. “It’s okay. I’m glad you enjoyed it.” Y/N said, staring into Lisa’s eyes. “It was fun. I’ve never been to a party like that before.” Lisa said.

“Like what?” Y/N laughed.

“I’m not sure, but it was different. Everyone was more relaxed. It was good.” Lisa said.

Lisa and Y/N shared a moment of silence before they leant in slowly and kissed. Y/N held the side of Lisa’s face as they deepened the kiss. “I should go sleep.” Lisa whispered once they’d pulled away. “Yeah, you should.” Y/N said. Lisa slowly moved away and walked out the door, Y/N watching her as she walked out. Lisa ran down the corridor and burst into the room she was sharing with Jennie. Jennie was laying in bed ready to sleep. Lisa jumped in beside bed and screamed into her pillow. “She kissed you didn’t she?” Jennie said. “Yes.” Lisa breathed. “Told you she liked you back.” Jennie said. Lisa just smiled as she turned off the lamp.

[chenziee]

Do you have any ereri fic recommandation? I read the 6th ward yesterday (and I'm still slowly moving on, it was so sad ;-; but in a weird way it made me accept Sasha's death in the manga more easily, and it's all good), so preferably a long one please. Thank you for being awesome!

Aaahh, thank you ;__;

Hmm, I have a few fic recs but I’m not sure what you have and haven’t read so I’ll just throw in whatever has stuck with me through all these years and I can think of off the top of my head meaning these might be fics that have been recced a million times over already because they are good. If you want more/something else, let me know :)(On that note, I’d like to direct you to @fuckyeahererifanfic who have a large and beautifully categorized database of ereri fic to fit any specific needs

I’m only going to link COMPLETED fics, because I tend to only read those AND I have a particular track record of fics being abandonded after I pick them up and now have trust issues but if you want some in-progress fics, I can rec some too.

The Little Titan Cafe by @pocketsizedtitan (66k words): Modern, coffee shop AU and the cutest thing.

Just another cliche AU in which Eren works as a barista in his mother’s café, specializing in latte art. And then there’s Levi, who’s not exactly your typical patron, because, well, he’s blunt and rude (which Eren supposes isn’t that much different from regular customers) but mostly he just confuses Eren’s poor little homosexual heart. 

Nuthatch (31k words) and the sequel Sparrow (116k words) by @sugarplum-senpai Canonverse. Pining and slow burn at it’s finest. All I’m going to say about it.

After the war has ended, Levi finds himself thrown into coerced retirement. With nothing but time on his hands, he buys an old house, and throws himself into renovation work to fulfill himself an old, almost forgotten dream: opening a tea shop. If only he could forget about expressive, green eyes and a smile like sunshine. Luckily, he’s still got Hanji.

[Prequel to “Sparrow”]

After the war has ended, Eren’s life is finally good. He’s seen the ocean, is back at HQ where he trains the new Scouts, and he has dinner with Levi every single night. So yes. Things are just as well.

[Sequel to Nuthatch | can be read as stand-alone work]

The Old Boat House by @oppa86oppa (102k words): Modern/fantasy AU, Levi is a merman (fitting to read during mermay no?) Has some andgst and some fluff, a bit of everything, really.

One night after Eren and his friends share a bottle of whisky, two bottles of whatever Annie brought and a couple of ghost stories, they walk the path along the gravel road, through the wheat field and past the small forest and stumble upon the old boat house. Inside they find something that’s sleeping on the bottom of the lake, someone clearly not human. One of them comes up with the idea they should catch it, probably fucking Jean, and in their surprise they actually succeed. However, in mere seconds the situation is suddenly turned completely upside down.

Eren doesn’t fall into the water, he doesn’t jump, he’s pulled down.

Art of War by catsonfire(53k words): Modern AU, fluff and comedy

Noisy neighbors, nursling dinosaurs, satanic box cutters, shitty convenience store management, the word ‘fuck’, hereditary (but not really) homosexuality, beer and ramen, pennies, truckstops, strippers, closets, semi-public defacing, rings, house parties, “recreational” drug use, accidental rendezvous, toxic stew (don’t eat the stew), nice abs, housewives–batteries not included, over-educational movie sessions, copious domesticity, kittens named after landlords, a shit joke at participating locations, and many, many happy endings.A modern AU in which Eren moves into the apartment directly above Levi’s.

Do you want me or do you want me dead? by fmaloser (82k words): Modern not-your-typical-high-school AU. A personal favourite of mine and the amount of kudos is a sacrilage. Although yes, it’s dark. There is blood and gore. The relationship they have is not healthy. Lots of angst. Boys are both broken and break other peoples’ bones, but I love them for it. (Read the tags before reading the fic.)

It’s decided that the school douchebag, Levi, needs a tutor to help get his grades back up. It’s also decided that high school senior, Eren, is perfect for the job.At first, the two hate each other. But after their pasts come back to bite them in the ass, they realize that maybe that’s not the case.

An Unlikely Alliance by @monsoondownpour (117k words) Arranged Marriage Between Waring Kingdoms AU. Everything you want from a good fic.

When Scouting Legions main trading partner, Wall Maria, is experiencing economic strain from constant attacks by the neighboring kingdom Titan, the leaders of the two nations come to an agreement: Scouting Legion will provide military protection in exchange for land and financial aid for the still growing nation.Their new alliance will be sealed with the union of King Jaegar’s son Eren to the Scouting legions strongest soldier, Lance Corporal Levi. But how will the cold, impassive soldier warm to his new husband, who is far from the weak, spoiled princess he was expecting?

Witch’s Vein and Bloodstains by @monsoondownpour (38k words) Fantasy AU. Not that long but so beautifully written it’s unreal. The atmosphere and how it’s delivered is honestly something I aspire to.

In a land of sentient forests and unpredictable magic, it is never wise to venture far without a witch.  

The Survey Corps is in dire need of a replacement after a tragic accident took Ilse’s life in a quest gone horribly wrong. Eren might not be what anyone expected, but he has raw talent and curious allure that even Captain Levi can’t deny. When circumstances conspire to pit the squad against the same adversary that took Ilse barely a year ago, will they be able to handle the challenge a second time round?

Fallen Star @monsoondownpour (31k words) Modern AU. Lots of angst. Actually it’s mostly angst because even the ridiculously fluffy parts hurt. (But spoiler: happy ending, yay!)

Detective Levi Ackerman had his life in order; a steady job he enjoyed, a close circle of friends, and a spitfire little sister who was all the family he could ever want or need. His world was a simple one until ballet prodigy Eren Jaeger stumbled into it.Someone like Eren didn’t belong in his world.Now he wasn’t sure how he would live without him.

Lists by Trick_Fantasy (72k words) College AU. Can be highly triggering for anxiety, there is emotional manipulation, and VERY toxic friendships. It’s about learning to get past all of that. Read at own risk. But it’s an amazing fic and will forever be one of my favourites.

The story of Levi (“Why bother trying to make friends when you can learn to control people instead?”) and Eren (“Because you can control people better when they think that they’re your friends. They don’t even know they’re being manipulated.”) coping with social interaction at college in their own different ways.

Augenfresser by @foxicology (75k words) Modern/Fantasy AU. Horror/Thriller. Deals with heavy stuff, the ending is up for interpretation and known to fuck people up. Be warned.

Monsters did not like to hide under beds, as his father had told him. No; he found the monster hiding in his closet.

Love.exe by @cofferi (70k words) Modern AU. Finishing off with more fluff/comedy so I don’t seem like such a psycho. Definitely a fun read.

All Levi wants to do is drink tea, run his goddamn convenience store, and not have to deal with this kid who keeps coming in to leech his wifi bringing down high-end corporations.

Also literally anything by @sciencefictioness is a sure bet. Just saying.

Also going to take the oppotunity to throw in my own AO3 because why the hell not (although it’s mostly oneshots).

I’m very sure I’m missing some amazing fics and authors but this is what I could think off at 1AM and not make it a mile long post. I hope you find something you haven’t read and that you enjoy these gems anon :)

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Also I can’t help but throw this fic in:

Tinsel Town by TheWonderYears (33k words) Modern AU. Psychotic-murder-boyfriends AU. Seriously. It’s very graphic. Blood, gore, torture, all the fun stuff. I love it. My ultimate fave, always and forever.

There’s Definitely Something In The Water.

Aaaand there goes my ‘I’m not a psycho’ claim.

[arthyen]

So this is how I met Aaron Tveit:

Long story short, I'm French, born in Paris. I've been a fan of Aaron for years but never thought I'd be able to meet him as he rarely comes to Europe. But I had a trip planned to go to New York City for holidays on February and a few months ago I saw that Aaron was giving a concert just that week in Long Island (thanks to @wallshipjournal for that!). They were also the ones to explain what was exactly a Meet&Greet (with @leepacey too) and convinced me to buy that pretty expensive ticket (thanks again guys, great advice). This is how it all started.

So the weeks passed as I got more and more excited and I finally went on holidays. My bf nicely agreed to come with me to the concert and we took the LIRR from Manhattan to Huntington, trying not to get lost (that was actually pretty easy) and appreciating the trip to what seemed to us like “the real NY” (I don’t know but it was different anyway). We arrived at around 5pm in that city that seemed pretty cold and empty at first. Although we couldn't understand a word of what the taxi driver said (strong accent), he dropped us in front of the Paramount. Things were getting real.

We entered the Paramount and my bf who didn't have a M&G ticket had to leave, leaving me alone with a group of around fifty chatty excited women (and two guys). I received a signed poster and a signed VIP badge. In the background I first thought that I was listening to the record of 54 Below until I got that... wait... it was actually the REAL Aaron singing!! And what a voice! He sounded even more beautiful that on the records! We stood in line for a while, waiting for everyone to be there, listening to Aaron's rehearsal, all getting excited to hear what he had planned to sing and giggling every time he held the note. I got quite nervous so I started to chat with people, asking them if they had already met him and how it went (good, obviously).

Finally he finished and some girl from the staff moved the curtain and there he was, on the stage. A rumble passed through the crowd and a shiver down our spines. I think it’s when everyone really realised that it was happening. As for me, I was feeling totally out of my confort zone, I didn't know anyone there, I didn’t know the shows on the tv screens, nor the things people were chatting about (what’s summer classes?), the whole concept seemed really weird and I was feeling a bit ridiculous. But at the same time very lucky to be here. After so many videos on YouTube, downloads of Graceland or Braindead, he was really there! Honestly I had thought about that day for weeks.

We approached and the organizer told us that we would all be taking a picture with Aaron, give him a gift if we had one, say hi, and then he would answer to a general Q&A (the questions were sent by us by email a few days before). Some people felt a bit frustrated because apparently in some other M&G there was some one on one time with Aaron to make him sign stuff and chat a little. Honestly I was hoping to talk to him about some things and a bit disappointed that there was so little individual time. Apparently it’s because we were quite numerous this time. But he was there, he came toward us and said hi to the crowd. He seemed a little tensed, probably because there was so many of us, but he was very smiley.

We settled for the pictures, it was going pretty fast and my turn came. I was completely red and shaky as he friendly smiled at me (yes, that dreamy smile). He asked for my name, which is very french (Segolene, like say-go-lane) so he  didn’t really get it, I gave him my gift (won't tell you what it is (ok a book, but not which one)) and mumbled that I was so happy and coming from Paris. He seemed really surprised and asked if I had made the trip just for the concert, so I said that I was on holidays and he laughed and said he was relieved (yeah I'm not that crazy. Not yet.) He thanked me for coming and gave me a hug (omg arms, chest, perfume, sweater, hair, omg) and we had the pic taken (look at my red face, it says it all...). Then I told him a few things about the book and had to leave. I was completely shaky but really happy, he was so nice and friendly, seemed really happy to meet everyone and grateful for all. Some people had brought posters so he still took the time to sign them. It was great.

Then he got on the stage for the Q&A. There was some music in the background so we couldn't hear him talking at first. We had to wait for the staff to shut the music off and turn on the microphone. In the meantime he was standing there, everyone staring at him and someone asked how weird he was feeling right now. He laughed nervously, saying that it was totally weird (you don't say). First the staff shut the music off and the organizer started asking him a question, but everyone couldn't hear him so he said he wouldn't answer until the microphone would be turned up (pretty nice of him). 

Finally it got on and he stared answering. I started recording for my friends who sadly stayed in Europe (@weird-dorky-little, that's for you). You can look at the videos of the Q&A on my blog, I didn’t record everything but most of it. My question sadly wasn't asked (I wondered what was his Hogwarts House) (yes nerdy I know) (I'd say Ravenclaw for my friend says Hufflepuff). But there were some great questions. I really liked the Disney prince one. I said Dimitri, I know Anastasia is not Disney but we thought he'd be a great Dimitri for a while so I had to. Also the Fiyero pants question was great. We had some pretty good laughs. It was all relaxed and very nice. I think that it went well, as you can see on the videos he was really sweet and smiley, he seemed happy to be there. I know at least we were. I think it lasted around 15 minutes. Then he thanked us again for coming and said he hoped we would enjoy the show (you bet) and left. It was around 7pm at that time so I left to find my bf and eat something. That’s when we realised that Huntington was actually a pretty nice town. 

We came back by 8pm for the beginning of the concert. The place was pretty small, with a nice view from everywhere. We were all pretty close to him, able to see his funny faces. He started to sing and it was totally amazing. As I said before his voice is completely beautiful in real life, so pure and clear. There were some songs that I didn't know, but some that made me shiver. By the middle of the show he changed his Hawaiian shirt for a top tank and suddenly ARMS. Wow. So much arms. The whole show was great. I cried when he mentioned the salami sex. I totally lost it with Shake it off and Never getting back together. I was shivering at One Song Glory. And I seriously blushed at Nice and Slow (hopefully it was dark). To me it felt a lot more intense than just watching the videos, I was really clapping and yelling, my heart bounced at every song when guessing what title it was. It was a lot of emotions to be there live. My bf recorded most of the concert, ask me by message if you want it but there are already a lot of photos and videos about it.

Honestly it was an amazing experience and I am so glad that I had the chance to meet him and see him perform live. I'd totally recommend it if anyone has the possibility, although I still think that the Meet&Greet tickets are quite expensive. But hey, treat yourself, right? It was totally my best night in NYC (even if we fell asleep on the train back to Manhattan and got rudely awoken by the train manager ringing a bell at 1am on an empty train on an empty platform in an empty station). I brought so many precious memories and Aaron was exactly as I imagined him, nice and sweet. It was really great. So yes, that’s how I met Aaron Tveit. 

[sicklyscribe]

‘sickly’scribe update because I want something more long-form than twitter

I’m putting this in a tag (which’ll spoil the punchline for those of y’all who don’t follow my twitter!), because everyone keeps telling me community is a good thing even though the concept of there being a community at all is not something I can wrap my brain around. If you’re part of that, hey there, my story below.

I really wanted to use this week for writing. I wanted to use it on fic, on short story projects, poetry projects, novel projects. I knew I wouldn’t be able to do everything, knew that I would let myself down sometimes. 

I really wanted to write an article tonight, to blow off steam, and I got a few hundred words in before the fog absolutely descended. 

I have a word for it now! The thing that nearly forced me to drop out of college a second time? that prevented me from finishing the theses I loved in the way that they deserved? 

The thing that absolutely paralyzed me in seventh grade as I was staring at a pile of books on Joan of Arc at 1AM, knowing I had to write two more flash cards for my research project and feeling as though my brain was smoldering ashes as soon as I attempted a thought. 

I have a new diagnosis for my pain! It also comes with a neurological component that effects focus. And task initiation/completion. And memory. And energy. 

I thought I was just a scatterbrained ditz who couldn’t respect other people’s time or manage my own. Now that I know it’s a symptom, it doesn’t necessarily make it any better. 

I’m jumping ahead because I already broke all of the news and the story on twitter. I don’t want it to just be there, I want it to be here under my amy-rants-about-her-medical-experiences tag, which, if you have ever encountered it, operated under the belief that my constant pain was a result of flat feet. I have reamed out paragraph after paragraph about what the search for that diagnosis did to me.

It took a decade of my life to get that diagnosis. I sobbed and fretted and begged and developed serious psychological issues with the way I viewed myself and others that I don’t think I can ever recover from in order to get. that. diagnosis. 

It felt so fucking good to have that diagnosis, it didn’t even matter much to me that the treatment itself barely helped. I had two words that meant my pain was real, I had a label that people could understand and could try to help me with. 

That got knocked over like a buncha bowling pins a few months ago. Overcoming mountains of anxiety over seeing my doctor for a tingling in my toes, and then being referred to a podiatrist -- even more anxiety, Everest anxiety -- they took x-rays of my feet and the man walked in and said ‘everything looks great! I don’t know who gave you this flat feet diagnosis, but...’ 

We proceeded to talk about the tingling, and the possible causes, and finally I was able to explain that I was diagnosed with flexible flat feet. I stood up and showed him. 

He agreed with that diagnosis, but his manner didn’t really change. As he was explaining why I didn’t have serious flat feet (which I already knew) I was able to clarify. “So you’re saying that the level of pain I experience cannot be explained by this diagnosis?” 

“No, I don’t think it can.” 

While I did have flexible flat feet, I was doing everything (other than exercise) to treat the condition, and there was no reason why I should be in constant widespread pain. He recommended that if I wanted to try other avenues of treatment that I see a rheumatologist or endocrinologist. 

Rheumatologist was first. 

This was a fucking trip, you guys. I didn’t even know if I trusted the foot doctor with the confident smile and the earnest evaluation. I’d had a foot doctor with a confident smile and an earnest evaluation before, and I didn’t know who was wrong. Now he was telling me to go see other people if I wanted answers. 

I’d had my answer taken from me, or at least thrown into doubt, and it felt like hell. I can’t explain to you how awful those weeks were, doubting. I didn’t have effective treatment in my entire life with this pain, but I’d finally gotten a diagnosis when I was twelve and it was my only fucking solace. 

Drowning again. Went to the rheumatologist. 

She presses a few places along my legs, my arms, my neck, my face. My side. “Does this hurt?” she’d ask, the answer always yes. 

Guys, she starts asking me questions. She knew from my file that I had depression, so that box was already ticked. Then came 

“gastrointestinal complications?” “Yes, these two in specific.” 

and “trouble sleeping?” “yes, for as long as I can remember.” 

“can you tolerate exercise?” “tolerate is a good word for it.”

“do you experience full-body aches and pains regularly?” This one caught me off guard. “Yes.” No doctor had ever really took particular note that when I came in with allergies or a cold my answer to “aches and pains?” was always “can’t tell if they’re more than usual?” so I’d figured it was something that I could explain away. I explained it away for her. 

“But I never exercise, don’t sleep well, you know.” “Not exercising shouldn’t cause you to be in pain all the time.” 

Oh. I thought. When you say it like that. 

I sat there in that plastic chair and took in for the first time that the pain in the upper half of my body was way worse than I let myself acknowledge. Almost as bad as the pain in my legs. And for the most part, very similar in flavors. I hated it. I hated realizing that. I didn’t want to realize that. I didn’t want to give those aches the time of day.

The questions continued. “Do you have trouble concentrating or with short-term memory?” 

At this point I was anxious, a little bit uncomfortable, and very very curious as to why this woman was reading off a list of everything I hated about myself when all she had on her records was ‘depressed, flat feet’. “Yes. Constantly.”

I’m a poster child for Fibromyalgia, and I always have been. It’s possible, she said, that I really did have ‘growing pains’ as a child that were so bad that they triggered fibro, which is a condition that typically has a triggering physical or mental trauma. I still don’t know if I believe her. I still have ‘growing pains’ today, and they’re still exactly the same. Haven’t grown an inch in years. 

She had to do some tests to rule other things out, to officially give me a diagnosis of exclusion, but it all came back negative, as she expected. We had a whole talk about all of the myriad things that people do to treat it. The medications for it would all interfere with my antidepressant, which is currently pulling triple its weight by also treating my two gastro diseases. And all of them had side effects that added to the neurological impairment. 

The neurological impairment is called ‘Fibro Fog’, which I had no idea existed and no one I knew did either. But it’s the worst fucking part of being in this body at the moment -- doesn’t matter that my entire digestive system is a minefield, that my muscles and bones are constantly screaming -- it’s the mental parts that I can’t bear. The depression is being treated and it is well under control -- but there’s no direct treatment for the fog. And the fog, I’m just now realizing, is the reason why even in this new era of my life with depression under control and relationships healthier than ever -- that I can’t write like I need to. Or do any other creative or active thing for myself. 

The absolute weirdest thing about all of this is the fact that it is known. It is not a closely-guarded secret or a rare one-in-a-million occurrence. Reading about it, reading what other people say about it, is so bizarre I can hardly breathe. It’s like I was a hermit, I told my mom recently. I was living in a place that other people couldn’t get to and couldn’t understand, and I was alone, and I was dealing with it. Almost content with it, with the space that I’d made my own and the experiences that I was trapped with. 

Reading other people’s stories is like suddenly realizing thousands of people have been living in my house, on my land, this whole time. My first reaction was honestly fear. I DON’T WANT YOU HERE!  

My second reaction was loneliness, and I’ve been bouncing between the two ever since. 

I’m a writer who can’t write most of the time. Artist who often cannot paint. Musician who barely plays and sings. I need these things. I need especially to write. And it’s not the pain or the intestines or the sadness that have been the main obstacle all this time, and I know it now, and I’m staring it in the face and screaming at it daily. I’m screaming into this fucking fog and it doesn’t make anything better, but at least I know its name?

My toes are still tingling, by the way.

[wong91kemp-blog]

Swing Pools Are actually Filthy Pits Of Anguish.

I have actually regularly been demandinged due to the notion from needing to system water for my activity, yet this week I ultimately went all out and set the moist things! As an example, there are actually a lot of pumps that are actually frequently discovered within water facilities, and digitized information is actually making this possible for business to properly forecast when these pumps could fall short-- in advance. The severe warm is actually leading to trip terminations in the Southwest, including Arizona, Nevada and California. Erik Olson, director of the Natural Resources Protection Council's health and wellness and also setting program, contacted these problems at a Residence Environment as well as People Works Committee hearing Thursday on water commercial infrastructure. Currently switch your tool 90 levels right, and also lose the top-most pail of water on the top duck. The Pokémon Go Water Day celebration started at 1am PST on March 22 and also are going to finish at 1pm PST on March 29th - that is actually 8:00 pm UK time for each and every. Character animation and detail: Open up globe activities sometimes help make reparations to personality detail from necessity but remarkably, Resistance fighter manages to maintain a degree from quality on the same level along with a direct activity activity. Add water and also the moss promptly increases, which can cover over significant passages or pipes. The Sunrise center will include Bluetooth qualifications and the absolute most up-to-date Bluetooth account, and is developed to work on the same bus that is travelling information around on today's chips. This water slide flipped the bird at physics therefore rudely that this levelled for a solitary summer season and then left like a drain pipe along the Stream Styx. In previous video games, plants, rocks, and water were actually barriers that your Pokemon must learn exclusive moves to overcome, yet in Sunshine and also Moon, you possess a thing that may call in Pokemon places to bypass those hurdles, and also those creatures don't take up area in your small battle event. www.dragosteapentrusanatate.info have actually designed are actually similar to photovoltaic ovens, so the doors are going to fume. The new MacGameStore Hot Deals webpage possesses deals on Tropico 2, Soccer Supervisor 2005, Zoo Veterinarian, Barrage!, NHL Eastside Hockey Manager, Celebrity Wars Battlefront, some speakers, and also much more games. They'll toy at it, plunging their feet details from the water without ever before splashing. In the longevity stakes, this Hot Quest 2 endures for a very long time, positively therefore even when compared with the hrs to become found in its own primary competitor. For example, Sunup currently performs not give notifies for brand-new event invites, a hunt capability, recurring celebrations and also activity details. Due to the opportunity this review has actually been actually posted the following variation of Daybreak are going to possess presently been launched, and also consists of persisting celebrations, occasion notes and a cool functionality that enables customers to add folks to occasions without in fact sending them an invite. Author's Details: I am actually a co-producer from Hot Girls Really wanted, which was actually directed through producers Jill Bauer and Ronna Gradus, and also created due to the actress Rashida Jones. Generally, this is a terrific little bit of optional location to teach up previously striking the next test - as well as offered the lot of Fire Pokemon in the volcano test the lot of water Pokemon offered right here is actually a benefit. Simply puts, some of the 4 guardians' surface specialties additionally pile on existing weather trends like rain or sunlight. However, for currently, the present well is assisting to curb the various issues Someone Like You lays out when residing without clean water access. In the video clip, they have an Apple Check out Sporting activity right into the shower and soap it up along with hair shampoo and also hot water. This raise happens hot on the heels of a $181 million expenditure only 10 months prior. Traders seem to still be actually enamored of Apple's reduced P/E ratios in addition to Apple's hot brand new G4 and iBook. GTM Analysis states the market for solar powers coupled with electric batteries will go beyond $1 billion in annual earnings by 2018 (up coming from simply $42 thousand in 2015), along with jointly 318 MW from solar as well as storage space capability installed in the U.S. already. Regarding impurities in the water, Wang claimed the last model might include a filter, but that water is virtually the only vapor the device records. Cold water loads a drum where a heating element transfers electricity to the water in the container as well as heats. Dig down a tunnel like the photo over to make sure that the water hops yet takes hold of the 1st duck past the link from moss and properties right in the road from the third and second ducks. Afro-american & White, Dreamy, Enhanced, Lomo, Sepia, Water Shade, Oil Painting, Night Eyesight, Warmth Map, Pencil, Neon, Blur, Emboss, Sundown, Blue Skies and also Tv. Citizen stargazer Xavier Jubier has actually drawn up a pathway for a private eclipse air travel, functioned with a Dassault Falcon 7X, that would certainly see 3 mins as well as 34 secs of totality-- the time period when the moon fully eclipses the sunlight. The Price: Usually, one bottle from maple water goes for all around $3, which happens as not a surprise along with coconut water costing regarding the same and also bring in $150 million yearly. It goes without saying, that carries out a great task from presenting several of the improvements made for Pokemon Sunlight and Moon. Your score is actually based on the time taken to full the bath, amount of rubber ducks accumulated as well as a bonus for water spillover. Which does not even feature how the busy, loud, and difficult environment from standard theme park omits individuals with some intellectual specials needs. Consuming alcohol the water these people supply to our homes is the most effective possible technique to safeguard potential accessibility to water worldwide. One memorable scene, featuring a psychological late-night substitution in between Noctis and Prompto, turns up arbitrarily if you keep overnight at a hotel. Thirteen presidents (from Coolidge to Clinton) possessed Hill Valley consistently fulfilled to their visitors while they resided in office, and the water is actually currently being served in the USA Senate. Speak to representatives of the 130-strong progression crew on this A lot of Yearned for, and also they'll inform you they expect most short articles on Many Desired to reference Hot Interest - Criterion's previous crack at Need for Velocity, released in 2010 - and also certainly Exhaustion Haven. Overall, Golden Sun: Sulky Dawn carried out a great deal to wow me. The game does not really attempt to stand out in the group, however that does not actually need to in order to leave a feeling.

[mysticpoetrystrawberry-blog]

Fight Camp Computer Game Application Review.

MachineGames' Wolfenstein: The Old Blood is now accessible on the Personal Computer and also a number of gamers have actually disclosed problems related to efficiency as well as reliability. If this takes place to you, the greatest trait to accomplish is power the tool off and also specify that in an amazing area for a few minutes so this may cool back down. However it did acquire me assuming (cease sighing in the back) concerning activities on the App Shop that are a bit like Mass Result. Essentially, whether your target is to start a practice of attacking the health and fitness center or even receiving to work previously, you'll want to receive reflective and also determine exactly what worked with you-- with any sort of practice-- before. You obtain a clean new match of energy armour in Brotherhood from Steel paint, and accessibility to the Brotherhood's armoury, which is kitted out fairly well (although you still need to pay for every little thing). Mirelurks, mutant canines, and radstags all roast up into valuable dishes, and also much bigger baddies like deathclaws, and also never ever undervalue the fortifying power from an excellent veggie soup. The stopwatch functionality on Apple Timepiece could be actually an instrumental device if you are actually an individual that is actually extra-serious regarding timing. Energy is actually the only point they could sensibly take care of regarding the Xbox's struggling track record therefore here's THE BEAST. Step 1: Restart your Macintosh while securing the Option (⌥) key on your computer keyboard to load the Startup Manager. Circle Quit is an addictingly simple one-button ready touch gadgets, from Nyc Urban area's newest pair of individual indie video game center Up during the night. Hear your very own playlists while working out to Power TWENTY. Our team allow music from any sort of application to play while you utilize Electrical power 20. When your watch electric battery is low, Electrical power Reserve method can easily assist you preserve essential check out capability for a longer duration from time. Since that was maintaining my phone awake for hrs, it ruined my electric battery life for most from the day. This is carried out by a survey, as the Planet Bank reaches out to those trying to start companies across the globe. You start as a timber fairy that becomes unintentionally involved in a terrific journey that can help finish a long war. You'll begin through constructing a gathering of 4 - none of this particular solo character meeting pals on their experience" things - you will encounter pals, as well as your celebration will expand, yet from the outset, you could possess a great well balanced set of characters along with complementary capabilities. Nine Elm's much larger progression venture, which centers around the power plant, will certainly happen in 9 phases. I cannot appear to discover the readying to receive that, presently the reduced energy key enabled through CCLowPower is on a second web page, all by itself. Considering that I really want convenience as well as quit the demand to improve my pc gaming gear every 2-3 years to run games on High, I changed off COMPUTER to PlayStation. He reared just over $600,000 in about a month as a candidate, the sort of money that does not signify well for remaining energy. Effectively, listed here are my Leading 5 Tips for beginning in Crusader Kings II. TL; DR online video model from these recommendations. The tale is actually has hints from the initial Mighty Morphin Electrical power Rangers series as well as includes the original 5( ish) adolescent heroes. I know this message is 4 months aged however I have actually been utilizing Swype on my apple iphone a whole lot longer in comparison to that. Microsoft window 10 is a clean slate with their brand new CEO which really has some excellent concepts. The main thing to recognize: The Phillies possess an unpredicted ace this period along with the yield from Jeremy Hellickson. NVIDIA has performed a good job of making apps2SD a point on COVER devices, however that of course adds to the expense given that an SD card is actually basically requisite. The starting point you can easily acquire a complete satisfy from energy armour remains in Concord, which is actually the 1st suitable city you encounter after you leave behind the Vault, stopping briefly simply as you go through Sanctuary to speak with Codsworth and also look unfortunately at your child's aged baby crib (amazingly still standing after a few century). As you could see, the stopwatch functions on Apple Watch is so much more durable that it first seems on the surface. I imply ... Solution loads never ever cost everything;-RRB- I actually find Windows 10 even more like a company pack. That also consists of an automatic disk check and repair work which may deal with footwear complications as well as permit you to launch your pc effectively. The additional you pull his rear back, the more energy he are going to roll with, though you possess a limited amount from electrical power along with which to toss your armadillo. Keeping that claimed, There is actually http://letrain-delasante.info/upsize-avis-prix/ beyond energy that participates in the absolute most essential duty in consoles purchases, which is actually Pricing. Inning accordance with Amazon, Angry Birds Area will certainly arrive on the Application Establishment for Android beginning at 1AM PST as well as will definitely establish you back $1.00 for the ad-free variation or absolutely free if you don't mind the ads. Kanata determined that if his electrical power can be practical to for the globe, he will team up along with the Realm, on ailment that he'll have the ability to also try to find his mother, that he lost when he was a kid. As usual, you may use the online device to look for the most up to date apple iphone firmware signing conditions.

[kineticpassion]

mental health mic check

I'm thankful for developing those control skills (referenced in the longer vid) as a tween, growing out of some things (and into different, but more manageable ones).  

Things manifest themselves differently at different stages in one's life.  My experience as a child is night and day from my experience as an adult (which is why I named the memoir "From Dark to Light," which, since I did not finish it before my Psychology degree, I decided to make a longer-term project covering changes throughout my adult life). One of my biggest current struggles in life is making things too hard for myself (as in literally over-complicating my projects) and (partially as a result of said over-complicating) feeling paralyzingly overwhelmed by how much I want and need to do (or as if I need to do x before y, y before z, but z before x).  I’ve been thinking that I will make better progress once I combine my various to-do lists into one master list, but even that task is quite daunting (because I have SO MANY lists) that it has been carried over from list to list for a year.  This cycle, as you might imagine, aggravates procrastination.

On a lighter note, pity on those who will have to listen to me recording my audio book from the other side of the wall, lol , because parts of it are likely to sound just like the example in this vid. 

Shoutout to John @fishingboatproceeds​ for bringing up poisoning.  That was one of my biggest things as a kid (nightmares; fearing for my life when I needed vaccinations (b/c the nurse could accidentally inject me with poison, or could be evil and do it on purpose); specific numbers of sips so that my drink would not become poison; etc.), and people don't seem to realize the complexity of these things (largely due to one-dimensional archetype depictions in media, so thank you for using your platform to help change that).  

(Other biggies, which are still there but manifested in a different, more low-key way (meaning I can take a step back and get past it whenever it pops up) were sharp objects and bridges. I won’t go into that, since some celebs have already addressed those, and this post is already too long.  I would normally read over this again to try and shorten it, but it’s past 1am, so I think a dozen times or so is sufficient.  It is what it is. )

longer vid:

(a personal example and discussion question below the cutoff:

an example of over-complication: I will be getting a new phone soon, which I have been looking forward to, but also do not feel at all ready for, since I have some things to straighten out between the pictures and files in my cloud, external hard drive, and on my phone's memory card and internal memory.  It's a lot like moving, really, except if someone already furnished part of your new place with copies of your things, and some of your things are already on a moving truck,  but you can't know which things unless you take a full inventory of what's at the new place and in the truck, and compare it with your things to make sure you don't lose anything in the process, and then you find out some things you thought you got rid of were actually already moved to the new place, and you have to double check your list to determine if you really meant to get rid of it or not.  I could keep this metaphor going (because I lost a few pics when moving them from camera sd card to my external hd bc cut and paste did not do it's job right, so now I always copy and paste, and then compare the windows side by side to make sure the number of files (and file names) match, and then delete them from the original source (sometimes they do not, so I do in fact avoid the loss of pictures this way)).  Before going down this rabbit-hole of thought, although I exercise utmost care over my pictures, my memories and creations, I hadn't stepped back to see just how MUCH this process is.

It's normal to obsess over split seconds in video editing though.

But enough about me.  This discussion triggered a question:

[bevseyeview]

A Woman's View: Amanda Orlando, Founder Of Everyday Allergen-Free

Welcome to a new series on Bev's Eye View! This series is called "A Woman's View", a little play on the tittle of my blog (sometimes, I think I am so clever...not). I love career profiles of women who are doing their thing and doing it well. I wanted to do this series as a way to motivate, inspire, and encourage women. Often times, these profiles are of people who have unattainable careers and unrealistic success. I wanted to profile women who are real, inspiring, and doing what they are passionate about! So, lets start with Amanda Orlando!

Name: Amanda Orlando

Age: 26

Current Job/Company: Founder, Everyday Allergen-Free. Associate Category Manager, Indigo Books & Music

Education & School: Human Geography degree from University of Toronto

You have a degree in Human Geography, what made you want to go into the book and publishing industry, along with being a food blogger? One of the biggest lessons I’ve learned since graduating is that your career journey is not linear. Despite having plans, it’s good to be flexible to opportunities that arise. I got a job at Scholastic after working for one of my professors doing research on American declining cities. I thought it would be temporary but I ended up really enjoying being part of the publishing industry (I’m a very avid reader). It also helped me figure out how to get my book (Allergen-Free Desserts to Delight Your Taste Buds: A Book for Parents and Kids) published which is one of my proudest accomplishments.

As for food blogging, that came about for a few reasons. I got a camera as a grad gift and enjoyed playing around with it. I had this goal that I was going to use the shit out of it [and]become awesome at photography. I had a Tumblr page for a couple years, just for fun. My photography was alright but it was just a hobby at that point. Then I got a book contract and I needed to provide a photography portfolio. Suddenly I just kicked into gear and created this small portfolio of my best shots which they accepted. A few months before my book released I had an anaphylactic reaction to improperly labelled bread that contained dairy. I decided it was a sign and started an actual WordPress blog to write about my experiences and share recipes and photos. This grew over the year (2015) and then in June 2016 I decided to close that blog and re-brand as Everyday Allergen-Free with the help of my close friend Joella. We wanted to create a site that inspires confidence in teens and adults living with food allergies. I’m so happy with this decision.

  What is it about publishing and food blogging that you like? Food blogging: I’ve always been very creative and I get really into things. I can never sit still and I’m very passionate. Photography, writing, and just “creating” in general are things I could do literally all day, every day. It keeps my mind active but also keeps me busy physically. I could start working on an article or a shoot at 7am and still be perfecting it at midnight and that’s totally cool with me. I also enjoy sharing my experiences with others who are in the same situation as I am. I’m always challenging myself to do more, better.

Publishing: The curation aspect of my job is the most fun. I love knowing that the books I choose will be enjoyed by kids and will bring them joy.

You have an amazing website, what are the steps you took to start your site and why did you want to start your site? The first step I took was to say – I want this, I’m doing it immediately. You have to just commit. It helps to make yourself feel a sense of urgency – if you don’t do this, someone else will. I bought the domain, Jo and I researched the best hosting platform to use (Squarespace), and then worked on the layout behind the scenes. From there we started generating content immediately and booking collaborations well into the future. Within a week the site was live and active, and we were reaching out to brands and bloggers that we wanted to work with.

Where did you get the idea for your site from? I started looking for sites about adults/teens dealing with severe allergies back in early 2015 when I had that terrible reaction. But my findings came up short. Instead I began following a lot of allergy mom blogs because I felt the need to be part of a community; I needed inspiration. And then it sort of dawned on me that I had been managing my allergies my whole life and that I actually had a lot of experiences to share.

 What were some initial challenges you faced when launching your site? Time! Our main constraint is that we never have enough time to do everything we want to do. We are really good about scheduling though so we manage to make it all fit. Our other challenge is geography. We don’t have an office and Jo and I live in different areas of the city so travel time has to be accounted for. It would be great if we had twice as much time and lived across the hall from each other haha!

What does a typical day look like for you as a blogger and an associate category manager? My day job is 9 – 5-ish (often later) and does involve some travel. I keep a notebook open and as my blog ideas come to me throughout the day I write every one of them down. EAF is my second full time job and I work at it every night. I do a lot of pre-planning before every shoot; curating the cookbook and recipes, buying ingredients, cleaning, buying props if needed, washing/chopping/dicing so everything looks photo-ready.

On EAF we generally do one collaboration or cookbook review (with a guest in the kitchen) once a week, usually on Thursdays. When I get home from my day job I have to do all the prep I just mentioned, as well as booking future collaborations, long-term strategizing, liaising with companies/bloggers over email, tweaking the site, sharing posts on Twitter and Facebook, and Jo and I spend a lot of time brainstorming.

The actual photo shoot usually takes up the whole night and then I have about an hour of tidy-up after. The next day I’ll do the photo editing which generally takes a couple hours, and then writing the piece which takes a couple hours. I like to post more than once a week so I also squeeze in an editorial post or recipe post mid-week. These could take an hour or ten – completely dependent on the topic and format. This often involves some recipe testing and planning. Jo and I try to go to networking or blogging events to stay in the know. I also do some freelance writing/contributions to other sites and just finished working with my new agent on a proposal for a second book.

I usually wrap all this up by 12:30/1am so I can get a decent sleep. And of course I regularly follow my favorite allergy mom blogs!

What are the biggest challenges you face as a food blogger and an associate category manager? I hate to sound like a broken record, but time is always the biggest challenge. There isn’t enough of it.

  What has been the best moment of your career so far? My book launch party was probably the most exciting and satisfying night for me. That feeling made me raise the bar in terms of my aspirations. It was also amazing to see my first contribution to the Huffington Post Blog do so well. I wrote honestly about my own personal experiences and it got over 2000 likes/shares/comments. It affirmed that I was on the right path.

http://www.huffingtonpost.ca/amanda-orlando/allergies_b_9703216.html

What are the perks of your jobs?

In my day job I get to do some travel which is awesome. Visiting places that are new to me, like Frankfurt for example, also gives me great material to write about. I’m also always surrounded by books which is a dream come true for any book lover. Blogging is all perk for me. I love every aspect of it, especially meeting amazing new people and collaborating creatively.

You have a strong social media game, what are your tips for social media?

Our Insta account is really Jo’s domain but I think I still have some wisdom to share. Pick which social channels you like best and focus on those. There are so many sharing platforms and it’s impossible to make use of them all. Post often and at the times you get most traffic. Try to stay on brand! This may mean you have to open a second Instagram account for personal use, like Jo and I did. It may be tempting to share that family photo from your grandmother’s birthday but it might not be of interest to followers of your blog.

 How do you stay motivated and inspired doing what you do?

Honestly I’m always trying to one-up myself. Every time I finish a post I think about how I can do it better the next time, or what I can add to the site to make it more appealing. Comments or interactions are also motivating because you get to directly hear what people think of your content or how it’s impacting their life. I’m motivated by the fact that I want to do my absolute best all the time. Having a partner means you can feed off each other’s excitement.

Which other woman working in your field do you look up to?

She’s not in my field, but I really look up to Mindy Kaling as a creative inspiration. She’s hilarious, she created the career she wanted, and she’s so confident. That to me is everything I could hope to achieve.

What advice would you give someone who wants to do what you're doing?

Make the decision and then commit; don’t let yourself put it off.

You can find Amanda's Social Media Links Here (Pinterest, Twitter, Instagram, and her Blog). All the photos were provided by Amanda Orlando!

You can also get Amanda's book "Allergen-Free Desserts to Delight Your Taste Buds: A Book for Parents and Kids)" by clicking on the link!

Thank you so much, Amanda for doing this!!

What do you think of this new series, put it down below!!

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