#stop invalidating Eddie!

[rogue205]

Why does it seem that whenever the “Buckley-Diaz family” tag comes up in 911’s fandom here on tumblr and on ao3, that part of the people using it want it to mean only Buck and Christopher?

Looking at the poll I found, a double digits freaking percentage thinks Eddie will die in the finale for gods sake.

(If he does, I’m freaking done with The Buckleys- uh, I mean 911.)

[virahaus]

Another day, another fantastic time to debunk completely delulu takes I've seen around. This one actually baffles me on a whole new level, and that people are ACTUALLY thinking it is canon it's giving me a headache.

Why, yes, on that nutter house that is twitterX (and here too unfortunately) people are now claiming that Eddie was Buck's Bi awakening in 2x01 in place of Oliver's recent interview.

First of all shall we look at the definition of Bi awakening, shall we?

"When someone, who thought or assumed they're straight, develops a crush on someone of the same gender and leads to them wondering if they are bisexual."

The key thing here is the realisation. You cannot have a bi awakening without having a moment where you are like "do I like the same gender too? Am I not straight? Am I bisexual?"

Which is EXACTLY what is happening on 7x04 and 7x05 with Buck exploring his feelings for Tommy before AND after the kiss.

There's NO bi awakening on 2x01 because Buck doesn't question in behaviour!! He doesn't have any moment where he considers his animosity about Eddie as anything more than intense dislike, jealousy and fear of being replaced.

Some of you are taking things too far. You are purposefully trying to ERASE actual canon content about a beloved character's bi awakening (something huge, especially with a 30 y/o character) just because you cannot stop for a second and not insert Buddie everywhere you like, even going as far as completely invalidating Buck's journey.

I'm not denying that in retrospect Buck may have found Eddie attractive (Oliver confirmed this as a strong possibility, yes, but that doesn't equal realisation since Oliver also acknowledged that Buck does not look any farther on his feelings on Eddie than interpreting them as personal jealousy).

But canonically Buck's bi awakening is Tommy.

You may not like it, you may not ship it, but you can't behave like this. Headcanons are all well and good, but presenting them as gospel and canon content? Y'all need to take a deep breath and actually get off the internet for a while.

This behaviour is only going to hurt the fandom in the long term. And it is not the first time or the first instance where you take something Oliver said in interviews and completely misinterpret it to suit your pipeline. Try some critical thinking, y'all.

(I'm aware not everyone is thinking like this, but those types of posts are getting over one thousand likes each. At this point it is a fandom problem.)

[rainylana]

“Yeah.”

Eddie Munson x reader

summary: eddie calls reader a b*tch

warnings: language, angst, tears.

a/n: i know these past fics have been short, i’m sorry, but i’m still trying my hand at getting back into this! they’ll get longer, i promise! feedback is appreciate!! :)

Eddie was not in a good mood. You knew this the moment you saw him through the window of his van when he came to pick you up for school. He ranted all morning about how he needed money for new tires, money he didn’t have. Work was cutting him hours and he couldn’t afford it. He was tired of not having money, tired of not getting what he wanted. He was having a damn bad day.

And of course, you listened graciously, but after four hours of watching him sulk in class and be a dick to his friends, it was starting to take it’s toll. He was pouting and you understood why. He came from a poor family and he wouldn’t let you help out financially in anyway whatsoever, no matter how hard you begged. You didn’t want to seem rude and make his bad day seem unappreciated or invalid, but he was treating his friends, and you, poorly to a degree. Not so much you.

Lunch was almost unbearable. Everyone walked on eggshells. Eddie was one of the most dramatic people on the face of the earth and everyone had to suffer for it. Hours past and he’d taken you home from school. Your plan was to go over to his house for a movie night, hoping that a few hours apart would help him settle down and cool off. It done no good. He was absolutely enraged when you got there. The hood of his van was up, smoke flying overhead and his dark curls pulled up away from his face. You didn’t even really know what was wrong with it. It didn’t make sense when he told you. Cars were his detail.

Dinner was no change. You sat and listened to him complain about how none of the guy’s were apparently taking the new campaign seriously. He had a hole in his last pair of good jeans. You felt guilty being annoyed by this, but he hadn’t once asked you how your day was or even kissed you! You were going to loose your mind. Without thinking, you snapped.

“Oh, my god!” You wailed, throwing your silverware down. “Jesus, christ, Eddie, take a breath!”

His eyes were round and wide. “Pardon me?”

You took a breath yourself, forcing yourself to not snap and say something you’d regret. You placed your elbows on the table and rubbed your face. “Baby, I’m sorry you’re having such a bad day, but holy shit you’ve not stopped talking for one second!” You really did have a pounding headache. “You’ve been talking about money all day! Can’t we just have a change of topic, please.”

He looked taken back. Shocked. “Oh, I see. It’s all gotta be bout you, right? Fucking forgive me for having a bad day!” He threw down his fist, clinking the dinnerware together.

“That’s not what I’m saying, Eddie.” You sighed tiredly. “I’m saying that you’ve not acknowledged me at all today. You’ve not kissed me or asked how my day was. I’m sorry you’re stressed out about money, but you’ve been taking it out one everyone, Eddie. You need to calm down.”

His eyes narrowed into slits. “Calm down? Well, last time I checked you were living in a grand castle on daddy’s money, right? You have no idea the kind of shit Wayne and I have to got through to make ends meet, y/n.” He stood abruptly and yanked open the fridge for a beer.

“Hey,” You raised your voice. “I’m not trying to belittle you, Eddie. All I’m saying is that you don’t need to take your frustration out on everyone, out on me. I’m sorry I snapped at you, okay-”

“You’re unbelievable, you know that?” He took a long swig after he threw the tab in the sink. “You’re my girlfriend! You’re supposed to be supportive and shit. Only thing you’re being is a bitch.” He sneered like a snake, pointing at you like you were his worst enemy.

Your face dropped at the curse, and as stupid as it felt, your heart sank. Eddie had never said anything like that to you before. Your face burned red and the room got eerily quiet. You felt your eyes immediately blur with tears of embarrassment and humiliation. You had tried to help him, offer solutions. You tried to lend a hand, offer him money and look for jobs in the newspaper at lunch. He acknowledged none of this.

You bit your lip to keep from crying, a lump building in your throat that made you feel sick. You had your head turned to the wall so he wouldn’t see you, but you couldn’t keep it in. You let out a quiet sob, tears falling down your face as you looked down. Your face was red hot, and you brought up your hand to your chest. “I’m sorry, Eddie,” You cried. “I’ve been t-trying to help, I-” Your voice broke and you couldn’t speak as tears escaped, your face twisting into tears. You sat there and cried for a few minutes before you felt the seat dip next to you.

“Hey,” His voice cooed softly, turning your shoulder to pull you toward him. You allowed him to, and you looked eyes briefly before climbing into his lap, wrapping your legs around his torso, your feet dangling off the bench. Your arms were tight around his neck, your face buried in his shirt where you sniffled. He smelled of cologne and dirt.

“I’m sorry.” He apologized, voice low and sad. “I shouldn’t have said that. I’m sorry, sweetheart.” He rubbed your back up and down, kissing the side of your head when you let out a whimper.

“I’m sorry you had a bad day.” You said tearfully, holding him like a teddy bear. “I wish you didn’t have to worry about money.”

You felt him sigh heavily. “It’s okay. I got the most important thing in the world right here with me.” He pulled you away so he could look up at you. His eyes were brown and full, his lips pulled into a frown at your tear stricken face. He took his thumbs and wiped them. “I’m sorry I called you that. You know I didn’t mean it, right? You know I didn’t.”

You nodded slowly, wiping your nose with your hand. “Yeah.” You creaked.

He tapped your chin. “Yeah.” Then your nose and to wipe away another tear. He leaned up to plant a tiny kiss on your lips, then one on the corner of your mouth. You leaned down to kiss back, deepening it with your tongue and a hand locking in his curls. Your noses pressed together like puzzle pieces. Perfectly fit.

[notafragilething]

Late Night Buck & Tommy Rambling: I'm Talking about Ryan

This is going to be a slightly different ramble than normal because I'm going to start this (and focus) on the Ryan clip that came out this afternoon. Trigger warning for vague discussions of someone making an attempt at unaliving.

This afternoon Tommy DiDario shared a clip from his interview with Ryan where he is extremely brave, honest and vulnerable and discusses his mental health crisis. In it Ryan shares that he made an attempt on his own life and how that has impacted his life and his views. I'm paraphrasing but he basically discusses how men need to let go of toxic masculinity and be able to lean on their brothers/friends for support. And if they're not able to be there to support you then go find ones that are.

This adds so much context to why he keeps talking about and emphasizing the importance of current storyline with Eddie and Buck. That he wants to show two men who are able to be friends and vulnerable and lean on each other. Because this is something that is very important and personal for him because of what he went through and how bad it got for him.

I know there is a lot of discussions about BuckTommy and Buddie and which one should be happening. Everyone has strong feelings on but I think everyone needs to step back and remember that Buck, Tommy, and Eddie aren't real. They're fictional. Oliver, Lou, and Ryan are real people. I've seen people using Ryan's interviews to suggest he's pushing this platonic storyline because he's homophobic, I've seen people being really dismissive of what he wants and saying making his character queer could be so much more important and impactful. And I think we need to stop with that type of language and discussion moving forward.

I'm not saying you have to get behind and support the storyline he vocally wants. We're all allowed to have our own opinions on what we want to happen with these characters. But we can be more respectful, more understanding and more validating when we discuss them. Especially now that we have this huge piece of context to why he feels this way that we've been missing. Because this is something personal for him and I do not want him to come across people invalidating that or downplaying it's importance. He doesn't deserve that after being so honest and open with us in an attempt to help others.

Other than that, we didn't really get any other updates on what is happening with this week's 911. I think they're likely saving most of the promotions for next week to hype up the finale.

We will be getting the full podcast tomorrow with Ryan and I encourage everyone to go support him. So I'll likely discuss that tomorrow along with giving any other updates that I come across and numbers on the BuckTommy reel.

[achilles-rage]

NSFW Alphabet

eddie diaz x plus size!reader

A/N: thank you anon for suggesting this!! this was lowkey hard at first but i kinda got into it like halfway through and i had so much fun. if anyone wants me to do any other charcters let me know! also i know most people headcanon him as gay (me included) and i am not trying to invalidate that in any way, but it’s not confirmed (yet) and i’m just having fun<3

MDNI- 18+ Only

A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex)

After sex he helps you clean up, having a shower together most of the time before laying together on the couch/in bed. He might put on a movie on low volume, sometimes talking and other times just enjoying being close to you as you both half pay attention to whatever movie he puts on. Honestly I feel like half the time he's OUT like 10 minutes into the movie though, feeling so relaxed and content with you pressed up against him.

B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

His: I think he likes his chest the most, but mostly because he's seen how much you like it. It drives him crazy when you run your hands up and down his chest, and it gives him a bit of an ego boost to see you staring so intently at it.

Yours: Tits Eyes<333 He tries to be a gentleman, but this man loves your boobs. He loves when you wear low cut tops, fighting so hard to keep his eyes on your face lol. He also loves watching the way they move as he fucks you, loving to lean down and leave marks all over them. He also loves your hands, loving to kiss and hold them.

C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)

I mean, he loves cumming on your chest, the thought of it helping push him over the edge. He also loves to cum on your plush thighs when he's not fast enough to pull out, loving how it drips down them and onto the sheets.

D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

He cannot hold back when you wear your pretty little sundresses. When he sees you walk out in one, his eyes are immediately glued to you. His eyes slowly trail down from your face to your chest, how your tits spill out of the top a bit, then down to the outline of your soft tummy, then down to your exposed legs, your thick thighs. He needs you right then and there. He can't keep his hands off you. He can't help but think about how easy it would be to bend you over, pull your dress up, and have his way with you. It's only a dirty secret because he feels a little bad about it. The weather is warm, and you innocently put the dress on to keep cool, and because you love wearing dresses, but he can't stop his mind from going to how well you would feel wrapped around him.

E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)

He’s had a few girlfriends, and of course a wife, so he knows what he's doing. At the same time, I don't see him as a one night stand type of guy, so most of his experience comes from catering to specific women's wants and needs. I think the first few times you have sex, he's trying to learn what does it for you, but he knows how to read people, so he's quick to learn.

F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)

I'm not saying he's vanilla or boring in any way, but I think his favourite is missionary, with your legs wrapped around waist, desperately pulling him closer. He loves to see your face as he fucks you, and loves having access to your tits, so to him, missionary is the most enjoyable. He also loves having one of your legs over his shoulder as he slides into you, loving the way you tilt your head back and whine for him.

G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)

I think he's a generally serious guy, which translates into the bedroom. He's a little goofy sometimes, laughing softly and joking around when the moment calls for it, but for the most part, when he wants you, that is the only thing on his mind.

H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)

I think he keeps it trimmed, the carpet matches the drapes. In terms of his partner, he doesn’t really care, but I think he prefers a little effort to keep it at least a little trimmed.

I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)

I think he's pretty intimate overall, lots of i love you’s whispered into your ear and his head buried in your neck to be closer to you. He's not super romantic about sex, as he's not really into the whole candle and rose petal thing, but he would definitely do it on special occasions like anniversaries if you're into it. He’s a busy guy with work and Christopher so when you have sex it's mostly when y'all have a spare minute, meaning he doesn't really have the time to pull out all the stops.

J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)

I think he's a man that likes to follow a schedule, so I imagine he does it most mornings, unless you're with him and wanna help him out. I think he gets pretty pent up if he goes too long without release, so every morning that you're not with him, he's in the shower looking for a quick release.

K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)

Authority: I think he loves to be in charge, loving the way you look up at him with those pretty eyes when he tells you what to do, nodding and being so good for him. He loves that you trust him enough to follow his lead like that, allowing him to do whatever he wants. He loves the shiver that runs down your spine when he lowers his voice, giving you an order, and the way you whine softly when he praises you for it.

Innocence: This and the last one kinda go hand in hand, but I think he loves how you look up at him with your wide eyes, blushing as he whispers something dirty in your ear. I think he'll whisper dirty things in your ear when you're out in public, loving the way your head snaps up, face getting hot. While he doesn't exactly like you being completely innocent, he loves the way you act coy when he whispers in your ear, pretending you don't want him as bad as he wants you. He loves watching you squirm.

Lingerie: This man LOVES seeing you all dressed up for him. He's not picky about colour or style, he just loves seeing you feeling cute for him, the way you walk up to him slowly, hands behind your back as you stand between his legs as he sits on the bed. As much as he would love to rip it off of you, he loves worshipping your body when you're wearing a matching set that you picked out with him in mind. He'll run his hands up your thighs, grabbing your hips tightly as he pulls you closer, looking up at you with a dark look in his eyes. He'll move his hands slowly up your torso, kissing your stomach as he holds your waist, humming softly, wanting to get you all worked up before he finally slides it off your body slowly.

L = Location (favorite places to do the do)

He loves some good shower sex, maybe a little round two when you get in the shower with him to clean up. You're already in there, so why not? He loves the way you look all relaxed in the shower, closing your eyes as the water runs down your body. He can't help but put his hands on you, pulling you closer, kissing down your neck slowly before turning you around quickly, pushing you against the shower wall to have his way with you.

He also loves taking you on the couch, although it doesn't happen unless you're home alone. Maybe it starts one day with you cuddling on the couch, your hand trailing down his chest to his stomach, going lower as you innocently watch tv, trying not to look at him, fighting back a smile. Next thing you know you're on your knees in front of him, his hands pulling on your hair slowly as you take him in your mouth. It doesn't take him long before he cums, and you're quickly getting up and onto his lap, grinding against him, still fully clothed, as he whines softly, twitching under you.

M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)

He loves the idea of being a family, so seeing you fit into his life so easily really gets him going. Seeing you in his kitchen, making dinner for him and Christopher, or seeing you come home with a random piece of decor you saw and thought would look nice in his house. He loves seeing you acting like a part of his family, longing for someone to share a life and grow with.

He also loves when you come workout with him. Maybe he offers to teach you some self defence, explaining how important it is for you to be able to defend yourself. You roll your eyes, but agree, since you know it'll give him peace of mind. The lesson starts off well, but then he notices the way your ass looks in your leggings, the way your thighs move as you punch and duck, and he's a goner. Now he's mostly focused on the way your body is moving, the thing layer of sweat on both of you, the way your breath is becoming heavier. He drags you out of there pretty early into the lesson, taking everything in him not to bring you into the change room and take you right then and there. Safe to say that he invites you to workout with him much more often.

N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

He's not into age/pet play, and he doesn't really like the idea of gags or blindfolds. I think he would much rather hear you moan for him, and be able to look in your eyes when he's inside of you.

O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

I think he likes receiving better, although he'll never turn down the chance to go down on you.

He loves the way you look up at him through your lashes, closing your lips around him, humming softly as you move. He loves to grip your hair, letting you control the pace, but still helping you move your head slightly with his hand.

He also loves going down on you, kissing up your legs slowly before pulling your body closer to the edge of the bed, before diving in, holding your hips down as you start to squirm.

P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)

I think it really depends on the day, and the time of day. I think in the morning he's more into slow and sensual, still feeling a little sleepy, but still wanting to see you come apart for him before getting started with the day. At night, he's more into fast and rough, especially if he's had a hard day. We all know this man is a little wary of talking about his feelings, so a lot of the time, he buries his feelings, instead opting to bury himself inside you, forgetting about his problems for a short time.

Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)

He doesn't mind them, especially when all that's on his mind is a quick release. He loves going slow, taking his time with you, but sometimes there just isn't time with your busy schedules. If the choice is between a quickie or waiting, he'll choose a quickie every single time.

R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)

I think he's willing to experiment, although he wouldn't bring up anything too out there to try. If you brought up something to try that he's unfamiliar with, he'll hear you out, and will probably try it once, unless he's completely against the idea. I think he's a bit of a risk taker, but for the most part, he'll stick with what he's comfortable with.

S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)

I think he's got 2-3 in him, but most of the time it's 1 or 2, about 10-15 minutes each.

T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)

I don't think he owns any, he doesn't know much about them so he kinda stays away from them. With that said, he'd definitely be willing to try them on himself or you, if you asked. He wouldn't necessarily seek them out, but he would be open to them if you showed him what they were and how exactly they work prior to using them.

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

This man is a fucking TEASE!!! He loves to watch you squirm, trying to act normal as he gives you less than innocent touches, and whispers what he wants to do to you in your ear. Once you finally get him alone he loves using his fingers and his mouth to get you close to the edge before pulling away completely, smirking up at you as you whine and squirm under him. To him, teasing you is one of his favourite games, playing with you until you can't take it anymore, begging him desperately to let you cum.

V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)

I think most of the noises he makes are quite grunts and moans in your ear, trying to keep quiet in case someone hears y'all. He loves dirty talk, but he doesn't do it all the time, instead picking and choosing the best time to whisper something in your ear to make you squirm. He loves when you talk dirty to him too, and loves when he has to cover your mouth to muffle your moans when you start getting a little too loud for him.

W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)

This man is SUPER possessive of you, but he kinda loves seeing how much other people want you, he's a little confused about it. If you're out at a bar and he sees someone checking you out he gets kinda smug about it, knowing that he's the one taking you home tonight. At the same time, he also has to fight the urge from grabbing you and taking you there, right in front of them, showing everyone that you're his. Instead of actually doing that, as much as he wants to, he'll instead opt for coming up behind you, grabbing your hips tightly, kissing your neck softly. He loves watching you melt against his touch, slowly turning your head to look at him over your shoulder, your attention focused only on him as you lean back against his chest, giggling softly because after so many times, you know why he's suddenly being so clingy.

X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)

6 inches, average size.

Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)

It's pretty average, not too high, not too low. He'd never say no if you wanted him, but I think he loves spending time with you almost as much as he loves having sex with you. He's ok with going a few days without sex, but he would also love having sex every day if you wanted to.

Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

I think he's either up for a while after, somehow feeling more energized than before, or he's really tired and you have about 10 minutes before he's peacefully passed out beside you.

notes: likes/comments/reblogs would be much appreciated if you liked this<33

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[agirlwholovesrockstars]

°𝄞 𝐒𝐄𝐏𝐀𝐑𝐀𝐓𝐄 𝐖𝐀𝐘𝐒 °𝄞

☆ 𝙲𝚑𝚊𝚙𝚝𝚎𝚛 𝙾𝚗𝚎 ☆

"March 21 1986"

♬♪ 𝙨𝙚𝙧𝙞𝙚𝙨 𝙢𝙖𝙨𝙩𝙚𝙧𝙡𝙞𝙨𝙩 ♬♪

ᯓ★ next chapter ★ᯓ

✶࿐ Summary : your heart was heavy and you just wanted to disappear in the world, you stumbled a peculiar old record store and jumped back into 1986

✶࿐ Word Count : help, I'm making a new series again lol

✶࿐ Warnings : 18+ Eddie Munson x Future!FEM!reader, cursing, use of y/n, time travel, comedy, sci-fic, drama, slight family arguments, slight toxic!household, invalidating mental health, slight misogyny, slight physical abuse, I added a character named "Veronica", reader and Eddie are both (20), reader is very defensive when it comes to Hawkins history, a description of reader wearing "Nirvana" long sleeve, ripped jeans, black classic converse, no mention of reader's race/eye color/hair color, reader lives in 2024, that's about it!

✶࿐ What to Expect : it's all the same characters from "Stranger Things" but I wrote them as if they "exist" in real life, I made them as if they were "historical heroes" in Hawkins!

✶࿐ Note To Reader : this is inspired from my tv shows that I loved, I'll be just getting some of the ideas but I promise this will be good and original! very fast paced and hopefully my writing has some improvements! 💗

✶࿐ Author Note : I just hope that you'll love this another world that I created! I've been wanting to do this for so long, please, don't forget to support me! your simple likes, reblogs and comments will always be highly appreciated! 🥺🫶🏻✨

𓆩♱𓆪 𝙚𝙙𝙙𝙞𝙚 𝙢𝙪𝙣𝙨𝙤𝙣 𝙢𝙖𝙨𝙩𝙚𝙧𝙡𝙞𝙨𝙩 𓆩♱𓆪

❦ 𝙖𝙜𝙖𝙩𝙝𝙖'𝙨 𝙢𝙖𝙞𝙣 𝙥𝙖𝙜𝙚 ❦

"Y/N, get up"

"But, I don't want to-"

"I said- get up now" your mom's voice is firm as she sighs as she walks out of your room

You groaned on the other side of your bed as you tried to shut your eyes but it seems like you're not so sleepy anymore, so, you begrudgingly sit up from your bed

"Your father is waiting downstairs, I prepared breakfast" she says when she passed by your doorframe again

You scoff at that as you tied your hair back and you stand up and went into the bathroom to wash your face

You don't want to eat with him, all he ever does is to spoil everything with his hot tempered behavior

Eating with your family was fun sometimes but you just can't ignore your dad's attitude

You love him but also the same time you hate him

It's so mentally draining that you wanted him to change, you always rooted for him to change but he never does and it drives you mad that you and you mom has to endure

You saw him as you went down by the stairs, he's now scarfing down eggs and bacon

You manage to restrain an eye roll to his presence as you headed towards at the kitchen to grab a glass and pour yourself a water

"It's a miracle that you get outside of your room" he says as he takes a sip of his coffee

Your mom clocked you and gave you a look that says "don't make a scene" , you squeezed your eyes shut as you take a deep breath and you drink your glass of water

It's literally 7am in the goddamn morning

You decided not to join him over at the table as you prepared your plate with the food that your mom make and you grab your mug for your coffee

You overheard the conversation of your mom and dad as you stirred your coffee the fact that it's still a bit hot but it didn't let you stop by drinking the half of it as you chew down aggressively on eggs and bacon

"She's having a hard time, go easy on her"

"Does she have depression? If she does that's bullshit"

Your ears are ringing and the voices from your parents are blurred out from the feeling that you're having, you're heavily breathing

You take the empty mug and plate as you let it clatter on the sink making their attention snap at you

You looked over to them and your dad as fucking as always looks at you like you've done something wrong

It's always been like that, everytime you tried your best, everytime you won a trophy or had an achievement, it is never enough for him

It is ironic that he's complaining about your condition when he's the cause of it, that's why you have this

You hate that he's always comparing you to other students saying that you're not smart and pretty enough

And your mom was always the one who never fails to make you smile most of the time

What the fuck happened? Back then when you're a kid, you like your father until you realized that's why when in family reunions you always caught those looks like "oh, god, he is going to ruin the party"

Yeah, he's maybe caring and do all of the stuff that a father needs to do, he filled his shoes with that

You just despise his generational trauma qualities

All you wanted was a understanding father, if he only just be like your mom it would be so great

"You're the one who is bullshit" you say as your mom winced and releases a deep sigh as she holds your dad's shoulders

"What a disrespectful child! You have no right to talk to me like that!" He shouts out loud as you went to the stairs to your room as you slam your door

You're still panting as you swallow the lump in your throat as you walk through your closet taking out your "Nirvana" long sleeve, denim ripped jeans and socks for your black converse

You tried to avoid the thoughts running through your head as you still heard the muffled sounds from the voices of your parents downstairs

You take a shower as you let the warm water hits your skin as you open the cap from your shampoo as you massage it through your scalp this somehow soothes you

You pour the body wash on your loofah as you scrubbed your entire body

You wrapped a towel on your hair and your body as you brushed your teeth and mouthwashed

You placed your palms on each side of your sink as you turn off the faucet as you look yourself on the mirror

You know you're not proud of what you're going through, you can't even feel anything, you can't do anything to cheer you up, nothing else makes you feel any better

That's why you always try to distract yourself like lathering a lotion to your body, putting on some minimal makeup and spritz a perfume on your pulse points

You still feel....horrible

You feel like the worst daughter on earth

You put all of your stuff inside of your knapsack as you put it over your shoulder

You click your tongue that you almost forgot your charger for your phone and powerbank as you finally take the leave out of your room

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You carefully took down the steps as you looked around at the place for your dad

It's just his voice that make your bones jitter

"He left" your mom spoke beside you as she hangs her head slightly low

You saw the red patch on your mom's arm that it looks swollen as she dismissively wave her hand in front of you

Your jaw clenched as she hugs you and place a kiss on your cheek, you sigh in defeat, you know for sure she doesn't want to talk about it

"I'll see you later, Mom" you gave her a small smile as she nods

You looked over at your smart watch and it says 8:30am, you're going to be late because class starts at 9am as you huff in annoyance

You start walking as you begin to fish inside of your pockets and take out your wired earphones as you plug it in your phone

*Mike + The Mechanics - The Living Years starts playing*

You associate this song with your dad, if he only took down his pride and start willingly without judgement ask you about how you feel, you would do it in a heartbeat

A car slowly following you as you heard the non-stop beeping, you take off one of your earphones as you turn around

"Hey! Why are you walking? Hop in!" Veronica shouts as she lifts herself to talk over the car window

You chuckle as you shake your head as you jog over at the passenger's seat

Right, you forgot she'll come over and give you a lift to school

Her smile fades when she sees your lost expression on your eyes as you forced a smile on her

"I'm here" she says and you got taken aback from her side hug as she pats your back

You smile fondly as you pulled back, "Come on, Vee, we're going to be late for class!"

"Can I just hug my bestfriend for a minute?"

You chuckle, "I appreciate it, now, step on it!" you point at her as she laughs

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"I don't blame Jason Carver for reacting that way, if I were him on his position, I would've done the same"

You scoff at that, this debate in your history class is taking forever, Veronica can feel your patient is hitting on its limit

"It's 2024 and Hawkins is still a shitshow"

"Goddamn right"

"Oh- what was that Y/N L/N? care for you to join us?" One of the students called you out as you can feel your eyes are going to stuck behind due to over rolling your eyes too much

You mock him a smile, "Yes, I do think I have something to share" as you stand up and went in front

"Oh shit" Veronica smirks as you slightly hit her shoulder

"You know it is never right to kill someone who is innocent"

"Well, how do you know Eddie Munson is innocent? Were you there? You don't know what is like finding out about your girlfriend killed in a freaky way"

"For starters, Jason didn't have any proof, he doesn't have evidence that Eddie Munson did this"

"Have you completely forgotten that his girlfriend was found on his trailer?"

"No, I didn't, just because it happened there doesn't mean he was the one who did it"

"Jason still remains the only right-"

"I won't support a madman who is willingly to kill someone who is innocent and always claiming that Eddie was the main suspect without proper evidence, Jason showed every disturbing behavior towards the people of Hawkins, many people admitted that he brainwashed and twisted every word that happened while looking for Eddie, he turned everyone against him who obviously wasn't supposed to be the one being pressed on and also let's not forget the fact that he punched Lucas Sinclair almost bludgeoning killing him and what for? Why would he do that to Lucas? Was he desperate? Is he frustrated for not having the chance to punch Eddie in the face like he always desired to do, so, instead he poured his anger everything to Lucas? and he wasn't even Eddie, Eddie was the one he was looking for right? Why hitting him the face to a pulp? that just goes to show that he is in fact the one who is dangerous, You missed out that his sister, Erica Sinclair spoken about it publicly on a TV program back in 2001 interviewing him about how his brother almost died because of Jason Carver."

Before your debater speak again, you didn't let it this time

"Have you completely forgotten, the massive earthquake that happened back in 1986? that's where the locals find out that Eddie wasn't the one who is doing those curses all along"

You looked around over your classmates and you saw one of them nodding along to your words

"Henderson, Dustin Henderson, he published a book in 1994 writing about his interaction with his dear friend Eddie Munson and he still keeps saying the same thing until now that he will always be innocent"

"Are you saying that Jason Carver is a villain?"

"No, he is just blinded by the wrong belief's and he needs a guidance for anything else"

Your teacher applauded you and the rest of class did too, your debater slumped both of his shoulders

"A+ for you, Miss Y/N" she smiles at you

"Thanks a lot, freak" he hits your shoulder aggressively making you wince at it as you shook your head sideways

"So much for not accepting losses, does he know sport?" You throw your hands up

The bell rings as it now time for lunch and everyone is leaving out of the room as you watch your bestfriend, Veronica, coming at you and hooking a hand around your forearm

"It's a delight to see him butthurt because he was defeated by a woman and he can't accept it because he has LDS"

"What's LDS?"

"Little Dick Syndrome"

You bursted out laughing as it echoes in the hallway, both of you didn't care as you went inside of the cafeteria

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Veronica dropped you off in your house after school

You stand in front of your house as you caught the screen door hitting back and forth as if someone break in, you immediately went alerted mode

Once you carefully walked inside, you saw every furniture is broken and every picture is torn into shreds as you looked for your mom, the moment she's in your sight, you kneel down and took off the bag from your shoulder

"Why are you here?" She's still shaking as you placed your palms over your her shoulders

"What-" you knitted your brows together as you went confused about her remark

"Why are you like this?" She saids when she ripped out from your hold as she stands up

"Mom- are you okay-" you stood up as you went to follow her

"I'm trying to fix this family and why do you always have to spoil it?"

You know what happened while you're away, they both had another heated argument

"I know- you're upset, mom-" you sigh as you picked up your bag

"Why are you like this?" She glares at you and you perplexed why she's blaming this on you

"Excuse me?" You tilt your head

"Why the fuck are you like this?" She gave you an outburst, you didn't have to let this thing get into you but you can't help since you're only a human being

You can't help to have feelings, so, you went defensive

"Mom, I didn't ask for to be like this-" you tried to steady your voice but it cracked the time your eyes went glossy

"Why don't you just suck it up!" She yelled those words as you flinched by the tone of her voice

Your eyes widen but then again it fades when there's a darker cloud is going over to your head overthinking

Your mom had a bad day and you know it's not your fault but you just had enough of it

"You want me to disappear, then so be it" you voice is stern as you turn you back and walk away

You forgot to look back at your mother's eyes, it flickered with regret as it welled up in tears when she realizes what she has done

She didn't had the chance to keep up to you when you're already running miles away

"Oh no- wait- please! Y/N!" Your mom called out to you but you kept running and running

You put your palms over your knees as you pant and step aside from the road

You started walking as you hang your head low

Your try not to think about it, you hate your family, you hate this town and the people in it

"God- I hate this place" you murmured as you kick the tiny pebbles on the ground

When you reached at the abandoned Starcourt Mall, you've never talked or spoken about to anyone else that you feel like you're been there before but you can't place it

Your brows are pulled together as you try to understand it, you also have these weird dreams that keep flashing whenever you're in a deep sleep

Was that a dream? Or is it a memory?

It feels so real, you glanced over the chain leather bracelet on your wrist

You can't recall when did you get that or you didn't even know if you bought it for yourself

It just so happens that it's there

You can't even explain how you got the same cap that Dustin wore, but for some reason, you hide it your closet

Also the faint scars on your neck, it's not gnarly but when you look closer there's something in there

Sometimes, you don't even feel like this world that you woke up to isn't real, it's like you're walking inside of a made up world or a like projector

You started to walk slowly when you only can recollect of the memories that you had with your "family"

But what about the questionable stuff that you have on you?

You might be sounded delusional but why did you have things from the heroes of Hawkins?

You looked over to your right and saw their monumental statue filled with their names on the bottom

"The Fearless Hawkins Indiana Heroes"

You don't know why but you always lingered your stare at a one specific person's name that is engraved on the marbled stone

Why does it feel like you knew him? not only knew him but you feel like you've been with him and it grows something bigger and much more deeper

But then again, you get a hold of yourself because if he's still alive today he would've been 60+ years old by now

This was supposed to make you feel even more sad if you walked around these monuments of them but you feel comfortable and close to them

This place was your sanctuary whenever you feel you don't like to get home early

There's a group photo that is displayed in the front center

You step forward as you tried to inspect the picture

Your eyes goes big as you can recognize the person beside.....Eddie? The Eddie Munson?

You can't see your face clearer that much because you're hiding from the camera and someone definitely captured your photo together all of the sudden

It's the same shirt and jeans that you're wearing right now

"No- that's impossible" you feel boneless and your cheeks lost its color as you try to blink more than once

You might think your mind is just playing with you but it doesn't even goes away

You're still in the picture, it doesn't have to be creepy but you feel alarmed by all of this

This is all becoming too much for you to let it all sink in

So, you left the historical place as you walked faster and faster

You ignore that you crossed the abandoned Family Video

You halt your tracks when you pass by a building that you never seen before

You move your head side to side as you swallow the bile in your throat as you walked closer to it

You don't know why but something else is pulling you inside and to your senses, it feels safe for some reason?

From all of the buildings that you went to, this looks new and it's looked nice inside

It's a record store, it's filled with vinyls, tapes, CD's

You got jumped by the presence of a older man but he looks familiar to you the moment he appeared in the front desk

You will never ever understand why that he looked at you like that

He got this knowing look in his eyes, this was supposed to make you feel weird, you can just turn your heel and walk away but you didn't

"I believe you will like this one"

He slides a "Journey - Separate Ways (Worlds Apart)" tape in front of you

Now, this is even got more odd to you, is that even a coincidence that he knew your favorite song?

"I'm sorry- wait- how did you"

"Oh shoot, I forgot to wear my name tag"

There he goes in the backroom as you frustratedly sigh

This is a very a bad idea but a stranger? gave you a tape?

But, you still took it nonetheless as you looked for your vintage walkman as you placed the tape inside

You put on the headset and the moment you start to press play

Your hands begin to swirled in the air, you panicked as it goes everywhere

There's like a lazer boom sound and it all happens too fast and now you're standing in the same place but you're in the middle of the woods as the peculiar building is now long gone and from what you know

The morning has already passed and from where you were earlier is already noon

You stopped the tape as you remove the headset and put it all to your bag as you try to walk around the area

"That....was....very....trippy" you said as you try to brush it off what just happened

The time you stepped in the road, you saw a lot of retro cars and you didn't even noticed the people inside of it, of what they look like but the moment all you can see is from the 1980's cars on the road you started to feel strange

You shake your head and you made up your mind that you're only just hungry that's why you're seeing things as you headed to home but then you remember that you had a homework for English class and you forgot to bring home your book, so, you groaned in annoyance as you walked to school

When you reached your destination, you gasped

Why does everyone looked like from those pictures you saw in your school library?

When you looked some of the students, you've been getting these eccentric looks from them, it's not offending, they don't even looked disgusted

It's just that it looks like you're in....No- no- no- absolutely not we're not going down there

You've noticed they tried to read what's in your shirt and you try to stealth your moves as you walked forward

Oh my god, it gets even more bizarre when you stepped inside

This doesn't looked like your school, you know that your school got renovated so there's a lot of changes in it

You're so crazy for thinking like this, you're crazy for asking it

"Um- I'm sorry, can I ask what date and year is it?" You asked one of the students in the locker

"Oh, sure, no problem, it's March 21 1986"

You need to restrain the shock from your face from what she just said "March 21 1986?" You say it again

"Yes, that's right! Wait- I'm gonna get to class now, bye!" She saids as she picked up her stuff from the locker and jogs away

"Oh my god.....oh my god- I'm in the past?" You whisper-shout as you try to calm down

You're so bamboozled as you looked at the tape again, now, you know why you're here

It's because of the tape that you played not an hour ago

You pinch yourself, you try to slap your cheek but no to avail, you're not dreaming

This is real and you're here

How will you ever get the fuck out of here?

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"I'll talk to you later, okay?" He ruffles his hair as the boy winces from his action, no way, that's Mike Wheeler

You're still walking around inside trying to figure how to escape this and then you heard his voice

You try to find him until your eyes landed on him

Jesus Christ, the few pictures that you saw from him in the books don't even do justice

He looks even better in person, he looks so handsome, you admiring Edward Munson from afar

You rolled your eyes to yourself when you find yourself harboring a crush over some dead guy, not even just some dead guy

He's a hero, if only the Hawkins knew what he is like

He has always been described in the real authentic books that you read that he is kind, gentle, playful, full of wonder, very caring to those people who is exactly like him, an outcast

Now, you're seeing it for yourself right between your very eyes, it feels so different in person, you always had been so defensive when it comes to his personal life, out of all the history in Hawkins, he's the only one that you ever truly cared for as if you knew him in real life, you've never even met him until now whatever this is, even if it's real or not, you're so honored to come by this close to him you became even more empathetic to him when you saw how he truly behaves while he was still alive

Your smile slowly drops when you realized that he doesn't even know, no one else in the group knows what will happen to him

All of the nasty things that people talked about him in the past and even in the future

You will never forget when in 2022, you saw the news that they lifted the case that he was truthfully innocent

When they should've done it years ago

Is this the reason why you're in here? To help them? To help him?

The bell rings that made you snap out of your thoughts and everyone is walking towards to the cafeteria as you follow suit

Oh shit, are you witnessing the moment of history that just happened here?

You shudder when you saw Jason Carver, god- his great grandson looks like just like him and acts like him too, you try not to barf thinking about it, his stupid descendants still spreading lies until now, you can't believe they have the privilege to do that

Enough of about the Carvers, holy shit- he got a fat ass point on his speech as you watch him strut his way in the table

You know D&D, but you never played it, now, seeing it unfold, god- he is so serious about it

Dustin was right, it is a sadistic campaign

The fact that you take a step back because you know damn well they wouldn't believe you if you told them what will happen to Eddie later

But, there's a force that is pulling you here and whatever you try to hesitate, you will still go for it

Especially you can't even stand by it for your conscience even though is already written in the books

What is done, is done, what happened, happened

Can you somehow change the past? Can you undo the events that happened back then?

will Hawkins, can be peaceful when you manage to remove the curse in the town?

You will have to wait until....He'll met Chrissy

Oh shit, right, he's going to sell K to the Queen of Hawkins High

But, first, you'll have to know her favorite song, so, you can save her and Eddie won't be a wanted man

If only it was easy to plan it, you know they can't just believe you, but you will try

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You saw Chrissy in the woods, acting all horror-struck as she looked everywhere and when you follow her gazes, you see nothing else that you can see that is terrifying, you ran up to her

When she almost tripped herself as she goes backwards, she bumped into you as she shrieked

Instead, you're the one who got bumped behind your back to Eddie

"Woah, woah, hey- I'm sorry- I didn't mean to scare you" he smiles all dimples are shown but confusion is etched immediately to his features when he looked at you

"You okay?" He looked over to your shoulder as he asks Chrissy

She didn't respond, she's still looking at the tree with fearful eyes

Eddie looked where she is looking as he gotten more confused

You hold both of her shoulders to swing her around to face you

"Hi, sorry, I know you don't know me but you gotta believe me, I know what frightens you"

She squints her eyes a little bit but the terror is still present as she looked at Eddie who is puzzled

"I don't know what you're talking about-"

"I know why you wanted to buy drugs to Eddie"

He moved beside you as he tries to understand the situation, he wanted to cut off the scenario but something tells him that you're saying the truth

"What-"

"I know you seeing things, Chrissy"

She's trembling under your touch as her eyes starts forming tears on her waterline

"I-I don't-"

"You saw the grandfather clock"

Her eyes widen when you knew what she saw

"How did you-"

"You heard chimed 3 times"

"You're scaring her, now, back off" He clicked his tongue as he gestures you move away

You sigh in defeat as you follow to what he just said as Eddie pulls Chrissy behind his back

Chrissy who is now stunned at how accurate the things that you just said

He roams his eyes at you from top to bottom, and he got curious at the picture that looked like a band from your long sleeve

"Who are you, anyway?" He asks you as he crosses both of his arms

"That's not for you to know" my god- his eyes are so pretty, what the fuck- okay, Y/N focus!

You tried to get close to Chrissy who has this hopeful eyes at you

"Chrissy, let me help you-" you walked closer but Eddie blocks your way

"Hey, I told you to back off!" He gave you a pointed look

"I'm trying to save her life!" You exclaimed, you missed the way Chrissy has become shaken

"What?" He shakes his head in confusion

Chrissy blinks rapidly as she's the one who went in front of Eddie

You stare at her, watching her intently as you see her nod slowly, meaning that she wants you to elaborate

"I know exactly who is the person behind calling your name out of nowhere, other people can't see it when you're in a trance, but I know it is real, he got you cursed because he likes to target people who are traumatized by their life events" you explained as you pause taking deep breaths

You continue "You buy drugs to Eddie just so you can be distracted from all of the things that you're seeing, when you ran out, that's where it all comes back again"

"Who is he?" Eddie scratches the back of his neck

"Vecna" you plainly said

"I'm sorry, but how can you be so sure that she is for real?!?" Eddie chuckles lightly as he looked down to Chrissy

There is only one way to find out that you're actually saying the truth

"Do you know what he looked like?" Chrissy softly speaks as she swallowed tightly

"I can't describe the perfect word for him but he's tall, has a lot of vines going over his neck, he has powers just by using his hand he can control over you like a snap, he looked like a.....monster"

"What a fucking shit show, are you buying-" he stopped when he heard the faint sniffles and the sharp gasp that she just let out

"She's telling the truth, Eddie" She gulped as she looked up to him and she went frantic when she glanced at you

"Okaaaaaay, I don't know what the hell is going on and from what I know I was only to meet Chrissy here not you, you just spawned out of nowhere and your clothes-" Eddie starts to ramble as he wipes his face with his palm

"Wait- no, don't go- Chrissy!" You tried to chase her but it was too late, she is gone from your vision

"If I were her, I would do the same thing"

"Like what-"

"Running away from you"

You scoff, "Eddie, I am trying to save a life here and you too"

He dramatically taken aback as he mocks a gasp, "What about me?"

God, he can be such a cute nerd dork but he's also a pain in the ass

"You don't believe me right? Let's just say after your D&D campaign later will be successful with your Hellfire Club and the sub that you demanded to Dustin and Mike will be Erica Sinclair because Lucas can't be there because of the laundry baskets game" you gesture to his shirt he tries to speak but you beat him to it as you continue, "when you go home, Chrissy will be there with you because she wanted something more stronger than you just offered but since I came here first to warn her, the deal didn't happen, so, I guess this will be the only time for you to be free to walk around"

"Free? From who?"

"From the police" you walk away with that and you didn't even bother to wait for his reply

"that's such bullshit, I didn't even know her name" he shooked his head as he left the woods

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Eddie wanted to drop the scenario that happened with you earlier

But, his mind won't shut up if you're right all along

You we're right that Erica is the sub

The campaign went well, too well

"Hey, Henderson" he gathered all of his stuff back on his bag

"Yeah?" Dustin replies as he helps Eddie to clean up

"I met up with Chrissy earlier in the woods but someone else is there"

"Shit, was it Jason?"

"No- not him, it's another girl but-"

"But?"

"She's different, she acts different and even her clothes are out of the ordinary"

"So, what if she's so different?"

"Dustin, she spoke something about Chrissy that I can't understand like the grandfather clock and some kind of a hideous monster putting curses in all of kids in Hawkins"

That's where the boy began to straighten himself up as he looked at Eddie this time who is still perplexed

"And then what else did she say?"

"See, here's the funny thing, I don't believe that much into predictions but she already knew about what happened here"

"Oh?"

"She knew about Erica, she knew that our campaign will be fine"

"Does this girl, have a name?"

"Nah, I didn't get the chance to ask her because it all happened too fast-"

He stops abruptly as he carries his bag as Dustin placed the boxes on the shelf, "One thing that made me feel eerie is that she told me that I only have a few hours left that I was free from the police"

"What?" Dustin looked at him in confusion as he thinks Eddie's words carefully, but why does it feel there's a knowing pounding in his heart that he might know what this is all about

The secret that his metalhead friend that he didn't know about Hawkins

"Yeah, I know, it's weird" Eddie just shrugs

"Maybe, it's all just a coincidence"

"How will it be just a coincidence when she told me everything all at once without her stuttering"

"I think she's just messin' with you" he gets on with his bike as Dustin doesn't like to think too much about the information that his friend just said

"You know what, you're probably right, pal- I'll see ya, tomorrow" He sighs as he gives him a small smile and pats his back as he waved goodbye to Dustin

When he's about to unlock the driver's seat to his van

Fuck, he jumped when he felt a touch from his shoulder and my god- it is Chrissy

He wants to know who are you? Why do you know all of this?

It's so impossible that this is just a coincidence

"That girl is getting all too real for my liking, jesus christ" He muttered the words under his breath as he places his palm over his chest as he calms down first

"Sorry, Eddie- uh- I still need the-" He cuts her off as he motions to the passenger seat

"Yeah, you can hop on" He nods as he jogs over to the other side

"Eddie, do you have it?" Chrissy bops her knees up and down anxiously, she craned her neck to peek at Eddie who is looking through his stuff

"I got it- somewhere-" He stood up as he tries to think where he hid it and turns his back on her and went to his bedroom

When Eddie left her all alone, Chrissy thought she was still in the same world

A cold sweat runs through the side of her face when she realizes it as she furiously panicked as she looked everywhere for Eddie

"It's time for your suffering to end"

"Eddie!" she got goosebumps at the sound of this monstrous voice as she continues to kick and bang every wall to cry out for help

"Found it! peaceful bliss just moments away" his smile fades when he saw Chrissy standing so still and he noticed her eye color changed

It's all white with blue-ish hues on them

He starts calling her name, snaps his fingers, clapping both of his hands, he shakes her by the both of her shoulders and slapping her cheek in the same process

His heart begins to thump into his chest when he noticed all the lights on the room are flickering non-stop

It finally dawned on him that you're right yet again

"What the fu-" he steps back when Chrissy begins to levitate, he didn't even know that his hand is shaking in fear

The front door bangs open as he fells all the way down to floor in shock when he saw you standing on his doorstep

You glare at him and then you saw Chrissy is on a trance, Vecna already has her and you know if you don't move now she will be gone for good

"Chrissy, I'm here, you can escape this"

You shakily put the headset on her and put the tape on your walkman and you press play

"I know he has you, please- listen to my voice, follow my voice, if you can see any portal in there, run for it, I know you can do it"

Eddie slowly gets back up to his feet as he swallows the lump in his throat as he walks closer to the both of you, he sniffles and has clammy hands

Chrissy saw the portal fading in behind Vecna as he holds her still

She quivered from the vines that goes along to her waist as she clocked the hammer beside the small table, she was just about to be covered in vines so she has the time to discreetly get it

By your doing, this caught the attention of Vecna as he turns his head back as he felt someone else doesn't belong in this timeline

She heard your voice as it echoes in again and again in the same area

The moment he looked at her again, Chrissy hit him in the head harshly buying more time to try to make a run for it

Vecna tries to get her but Chrissy swiftly dodges his traps as he grunts in pain

"Eddie" you call his name for assistance

He's in a state of shock as he doesn't know what to do, his ears began to throb as he can't steady the beating of his heart

"Eddie!" You said it out loud this time

"Y-Yeah?" His eyes are misty as he blinks at you

"I know you're scared but I need you to get ready to catch her, she must land between the two of us so she won't get hurt, Okay?" You demonstrate it to him

He gives you a tight nod as he inhales deeply

When Chrissy reaches the portal with you and Eddie being on it, the sight became all pitch black

The moment she woke up realizing she's still floating she dropped into your arms to Eddie's and she's finally brought back into the real world

She gasps in relief and began to wail in your arms and to Eddie's, she's still looking around as if she were being tricked again, you saw the look of almost life-threatening experience on her eyes, your eyes starts to water when she recognizes you and let her embrace you as she begins to weep

You saw Eddie's hands quavering as he looks like he's about to faint from what he just witnessed

Before he hits his head first, you hold his hand tightly making him look in your eyes directly as you use your other hand to held Chrissy as you comfort her

"You're okay, we're safe.....for now"

₊˚ʚ ᗢ₊˚✧ ﾟ.₊˚ʚ ᗢ₊˚✧ ﾟ.₊˚ʚ ᗢ₊˚✧ ﾟ.₊˚ʚ ᗢ₊˚✧ ﾟ.₊˚ʚ

taglist <3 : @paleidiot @marsmallow433 @whothefckissofia @letsfallinlove-blog @silky-luxe @imagine-all-the-imagines @theladyasgard

(Yay, finally, I posted the first chapter of this series and I hope you enjoyed and liked it! Thank you so so so very much of your support! I greatly appreciate it, I did not expected my idea to be recognized and I feel so happy about it! take care always and stay hydrated! I hope y'all stick around for the next part! 🥺🫶🏻✨)

[moonlightperseus]

breathe in the feeling

ambiguously set after the first half of s7 | 867 words

Being in love with Buck wasn’t an option.

It can’t be an option.

Because if it was, Eddie might do something stupid, like kiss his best friend.

Which is—not an option.

Eddie’s done that song and dance before, and that ended badly—leaving and being left, divorce papers, blood on hot asphalt.

But the thing is, Eddie can’t stop thinking about it. It’s been over a month since Buck came out to him, and Eddie can’t stop thinking about how Buck is an option now.

Which isn’t even entirely true, because Buck is with Tommy—Buck is happy with Tommy—and Eddie feels like his entire world is collapsing in on itself.

He broke up with Marisol last week, something that up until this moment, he hadn’t told anyone, not even Christopher—which he knows he can only avoid for so long.

He’s not even sure why he’s telling Bobby, because now Bobby is staring at him quizzically and Eddie is feeling closer to a panic attack than he’s been in a long time.

“You broke up with Marisol,” Bobby repeats back to him, because he’s been waiting for Eddie to continue and Eddie has made a point out of staring at his hands and not saying anything as his brain spirals. “Do you want to talk about that?”

“No,” Eddie says, because he really doesn’t—but he sucks in a sharp breath and rips the band-aid off anyways, “I think I might be in love with Buck.”

Bobby doesn’t say anything for what feels like an eternity.

Eddie finally gives in and looks at him, Bobby’s face is a carefully crafted blank expression—he’s processing the information Eddie has given him, but he’s not going to give any reaction in the meantime.

Eddie resists dropping his head against the table and instead settles for staring at the dormant alarm bell on the wall and hoping for it to start ringing to save him from this situation.

“I see,” Bobby says finally, “that’s… that must be a lot for you to process.”

“Understatement of the century,” Eddie mumbles, allowing himself to drop his head into his hands—it’s not quite as satisfying as the thunk of his forehead against the table would be.

“So how long have you been… processing this?”

“I don’t know, a couple weeks, maybe—” —my whole life, possibly, he doesn’t say.

A hand lands on his shoulder, the touch is gentle and grounding, and Eddie is reminded of why he went to Bobby in the first place.

“Eddie,” Bobby says carefully, “there’s nothing wrong with it—being in love with Buck. If that is how you feel, there’s nothing wrong with that.”

Eddie exhales slowly, because that’s the whole thing, isn’t it? “I know that—logically, I know that. I’ve never had a problem with—I guess it’s different, when it’s yourself. But it’s not like it’s even—I mean, Buck’s with Tommy—Buck’s happy with Tommy—and Tommy’s my friend too, so it is kind of wrong, in a way.” 

“Buck being in a relationship with someone else doesn’t make your feelings for him invalid—or wrong. Sure, maybe it’s a little complicated since you consider them both friends. But whatever you’re feeling—you’re allowed to feel it.” 

“But what am I supposed to do with it?” Eddie finally meets Bobby’s gaze, “I mean—I feel like I’m lying to Buck, somehow, by feeling this way—by not saying anything.”

“Maybe you don’t have to do anything with it, at least—not right away,” Bobby squeezes his shoulder before removing his hand, “maybe right now you just let yourself feel it. I’m not saying you shouldn’t be honest with Buck, but I think maybe you should start by allowing yourself to be honest with you.” 

Eddie stares at Bobby, completely and painfully aware of his own heart beating in his chest, it’s not a panic attack, but he knows it’s a warning sign. 

He takes a moment to breathe slowly, the way Frank taught him. Bobby says nothing, waiting patiently 

“I don’t know what that looks like.” Eddie says honestly. 

Bobby offers him a kind smile, “That’s okay, you don’t have to have it all figured out, but maybe allow yourself the time to really think about it?”

“What if I lose him?” The words spill out of him unbidden. 

“Eddie, if there’s one thing I know for sure, it’s that you and Buck have a way of finding each other, no matter the circumstance, the two of you will always fight to find each other again.” 

Eddie blinks, and for a moment, all he sees is Buck, covered in Eddie’s own blood, begging for him to hold on. 

He blinks again, and the memory fades, and it’s just Bobby sitting there in front of him, watching him carefully.

“Let yourself feel it, Eddie,” Bobby says gently, “and when you’re ready—talk to Buck.”

The bell rings then, because timing never seems to be on Eddie’s side. 

Bobby sighs softly, “well, duty calls.”

Bobby stands to head towards the engine bay, but before Eddie can do the same, Bobby rests a hand on his shoulder again, “I’m really proud of you, Eddie.”

He lets the words settle over him for a moment—breathing slowly in and out—and then follows after his Captain. 

[justmeinadaze]

Children of the Night Part 6 (Steddie X You)

Warnings: Vampire Steddie/ Daddy Eddie/Sub Steve X Human sub fem reader, SMUT, while drinking blood (nothing new here), holding wrists, lose of virginity (in a flashback between steddie), dirty talk, FLUFF, they love each other, flashbacks of how this Steddie met and their first time together, ANGST, reader and Steve get hurt due to a break in, reader blames herself, Eddie get worried about losing Steve, in flashbacks Steve's relationship with his family is touched on including them kicking him out for his sexuality (the actual fight isn't elaborated on; just the aftermath), mentions of the night Steve thought he lost Eddie.

A good amount of feels in this one so please...enjoy :)

Word Count: 4662

Loud knocking on their door startles you as both men roll their eyes. 

“Do you have to be so aggressive?”, Steve scolds after opening it and allowing the curly haired boy entry. To his surprise, another boy followed behind him. 

“I brought Mike to do some extra digging and help reroute the servers. We need to find out how they found you so we can make sure it doesn’t happen again.”, the young man explains before turning to face you. “Hi. I’m Dustin and this is my friend Mike.”

“I’m Y/N.”, you smile as you shake his hand. 

“Cool.”, he beams as they throw their bags down and take a seat at the computer. “Why didn’t you guys mention you made a friend?”

“She’s not our friend. We kidnapped her and she’s here against her will. You know you’re our only friend Henderson.”, Eddie sass as he hovers over them. 

“Ooo someone’s grouchy. When was the last time you ate?”

“It won’t help. This is always his demeanor.”, you tease making the vampire smirk in your direction. 

As they began to work, you explained to them what happened and listened to their feedback with fascination. You had never met kids so young who knew about all these things that you did but it tickled your brain to finally have someone to bounce off your computer knowledge with. Eddie and Steve sat on the bed watching you with small smiles on their faces. They loved seeing you be happy especially the metalhead who could feel the warmth through to his soul. 

“Where did you learn all this stuff, Y/N?”, Steve asked.

“Oh, um, that incident I told you about on the beach? That wasn’t the first time I ran off. When I was a kid and I knew my mom would have some creepy guy over I would stay with a friend whose dad was a computer whiz. That was when computers were much boxier though.”, you grin.  

“Yeah and back then it was easier to get away with the things you’re trying to get away with right now because it was in its infancy. You said, Y/N, they intercepted the traffic but not during the stream?” Dustin nods when you affirm his answer.

“That means they still haven’t found the exact location so the bounce is still working. Maybe we can just reroute that?”, Mike suggests.

“Is there a way we can hide it all together?”

“Um, not exactly. I mean we CAN hide it but not completely.”, the curly haired teenager responds to your question. “This may take us awhile if you three want to go out or something.”

“Oh, I’m sorry, Henderson. Are we distracting you?”, Eddie jests making the younger boys chuckle. 

“Come on, grouchy. Let’s go for a walk.”, you beam.

***

While you and the vampire went for stroll around the neighborhood, Steve offered to go to your house to get a couple more of your things so you’d have a change of clothes and essentials. 

“So, they know all about your adventures in that scary place?”

“Oh yeah. They were handling it alone believe it or not for a while. Mike’s best friend was kidnapped by one of the monsters down there and they fought to get him back along with Mike’s girlfriend who has superpowers.”

“Jesus. There’s so much unknown in this world, huh. Kind of makes what I’ve been through seem so small.”

Eddie’s hand yanked you back as he came to a stop. 

“It’s not though. Don’t invalidate yourself like that, princess.”

“Y/N Y/L/N! Where the hell have you been?!”, your best friend shouts from across the street. 

“Hey Lilly.”

“Don’t you ‘hey Lilly’ me! I have been so worried. I almost filed a missing persons report! Where the fuck have—”

“I’m fine, Lil! Calm down. I’ve just been working a lot and hanging out with my friends. This is Eddie.”, you gesture towards him. 

A sarcastic smile spread across her face before she marches toward him and hits his arm with her bag. 

“I…have…been…worried…sick!”

“Ow! Hey, we told her to double check her phone.”, Eddie defends.

“Oh shit my phone. I’m so sorry. I haven’t checked in a while.”

“Y/N,” she sighs. “You can’t just disappear like that. I thought John maybe…”

“I don’t know where John is. I haven’t seen him since he came by my house.”

“Did you know Arthur’s missing to? Their dad is looking everywhere for them including your house. When he came to talk to me he said every time he goes to your place you aren’t home so… I panicked.”

“Lilly, honey, I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean to scare you. I’m alright, I swear.”

Your best friend exhales heavily as she wraps her arms around you. 

“If I call you next time, you answer do you hear me?” She smiles as you give fake salute. “If you hurt her I will kill you.”

He flashes her a smile of his own as she turns around and heads back to her car. 

“Should we be concerned about the dad?”, Eddie inquires. “She said he was looking for you and I felt your fear.”

“That entire family scares me but we should be ok.”, you try to comfort him but he still feels your hesitation. “Let’s, um, let’s go home.”

***

As dawn slowly approaches, you and the vampire begin to panic when Steve still hadn’t gotten back from your place. 

“Do you feel him?”

“I don’t. Wherever he is he’s not feeling anything but that could also mean—”

“He’s knocked out. I’m going to my house.”

“Wait! I can run you there faster.”

“No you can’t. The sun is coming up! Just stay here, baby, ok?” Taking the human boy’s keys, you run to his car and speed over to your house. As you park in your driveway, you realize your front door is wide open and you can see your house has been ransacked. “Steve?”

Cautiously you step inside, grabbing a knife from the kitchen and holding it out as you look around. As you turn into your bedroom you find Steve passed out on the floor, bleeding from his chest. 

“Steve?! No. No, no, no. Baby, wake up! Look at me!”

“Y/N?”, he mumbled at the sound of your voice.

“Fuck! Come on. We need to get you to Eddie.” Throwing his arm over your neck, you try to move him but it’s no use. He’s too heavy. “Please, Steve.”, you cry, finally giving up as you grab the phone to call 911. As soon as your hand makes contact with your device, something hard hits your head as the world goes dark. 

***

“There she is. Come on now, Y/N.”, a deep voice urges as your eyes slowly blink open. “There we go. I thought you were never going to come home.”

Taking in your surroundings, Steve is still knocked out in front of you and still alive but his breathing is shallow. You were restrained to your bedframe on the ground with your hands tied behind your back and when your eyes finally landed on your capture, you came face to face with John and Arthur’s father. 

“Good to see you again, Y/N. I see you’ve been busy.”, he gestures towards the bloody boy on the floor. “I guess my son wasn’t good enough for you. Where is he?”

“I don’t know.”

A hand flies across your face and you suddenly feel an anger in your belly you know isn’t yours. You must still have Eddie’s blood in you. Glancing out the window you realized it was almost sundown; you just needed to buy time. 

“Arthur said John was coming her to confront you about you cheating. Then he disappears. Two days later my son goes looking for his brother over here and then he disappears. That’s not a coincidence, Y/N. Where are they?”

“I don’t know.”

He hits you again and once more that anger rises. You can practically feel the vampire fuming as he paces. 

“If I were you, Thomas, I would leave now.”

“Oh? And why is that?”

“Because if you’re still here when the sun goes down, then you’ll be reunited with your asshole sons.”

Kneeling by your side, he holds the knife to your throat making you wince as he draws blood.

“What did you do to my kids?”

“It’s not what I did. It’s what they did to me! John hurt me constantly and the last night I saw him he gave me a black eye before he was ripped to shreds. Arthur fucking shot me before he was killed. I’m glad their gone but I feel bad for them having had you as a father!”

The man kicks your side hard causing you to double over in pain. 

“Stop lying, bitch. If Arthur shot you, you wouldn’t be up and moving around like you are.”

Steve’s watch beeps on his wrist and you chuckle as you spit in his direction. 

“Last chance to leave.” The front door crashes open as Eddie skids to a stop behind the man. “Too late.”

Closing your eyes, you listen as the vampire murders your ex’s father before there’s a sudden silence and you feel your binds being cut. 

“Are you ok?”

“Steve... He needs you.”

You both crawl to his side as Eddie lifts him in arms. 

“Steven, you have to drink now, baby, ok?” The boy’s eyes remain closed as his boyfriend shakes him. “No! No, sweetheart, don’t you dare leave me. FUCK! I’m so sorry.”

Lifting him into his arms, Eddie bites into his neck and slurps at his blood as you watch helplessly. After a few moments, he comes off him with a pop and swiftly slices open his wrist, allowing the blood to fall into the man’s mouth. 

“Come on, Stevie. Please, baby.”, he whispered. Abruptly, Steve’s eyes snap open as he clings to his boyfriend’s arm and drinks causing the vampire’s eyes to roll back. “Fuck, that’s it. Good boy. Y/N…can…can you move?”

“Yeah, what do you need?”

“Take his keys and head back to our house. We’ll be right—mmm--there but I need you to get those boys out. I don’t…don’t care if they aren’t done.”

Nodding, you sprinted out the front door to do what you were told and sped back to their house. 

“We rerouted everything and you guys are up and running again. I wouldn’t worry too much—Jesus. Y/N what happened?!”

“You two need to leave NOW.”

“Are you kidding?! What’s going on? Are Eddie and Steve alright?!”, Dustin shouted. 

“YES!”, you lied. “But we need you guys to go to hotel or home. I promise you I’ll make him call you and tell you everything! PLEASE!”

Hesitating for only a moment, they quickly gathered their bags and you watched as they got into their rental car to drive off into the night. As soon as they disappeared, Eddie flew past you and placed Steve on the bed. 

“I don’t know if it worked. He just passed out while drinking from me. Fuck. Fuck! I should have gone with you or gotten your things for you. Your house is never safe.” Sensing your guilt, he hastily turns around and cups your face. “No, hey. I didn’t mean it like that. This isn’t your fault, sweetheart. Ok? Shit.”, he flinches as he sways and you carefully guide him to the floor. “He took a lot from me. Can you—”

He didn’t even finish his sentence before you ran into the kitchen to find a bag of blood, tearing it open, and bringing it back to him. As he chugs it back, his black eyes scan you over.

“When I feel better, I can heal you to.”

“No, Eddie. I’m ok. I just want you to focus on you two.”

“Y/N, I woke up after 2 months…I don’t know how long it’s going to take him.”

###########

That evening, you looked after them both with Eddie refusing to leave his boyfriend’s side. Removing Steve’s shirt, you used a rag to clean the blood from where his stab wound had been and wiped away the mess around his mouth. All of the previous wounds were gone but his breathing was still extremely shallow. 

Curling up behind Eddie, you held him as he cuddled up into Steve’s nook and caressed his face. 

“Is this what it felt like, baby? When you thought I was gone… I’m so fucking sorry, Steve. You never should have experienced this. It hurts way more than those little fucker’s teeth ever did. Please, come back to me.”, he cried.

The memory of him waking up and feeling alone clouded his mind; the feeling of being lost before hearing his lover’s voice and their song on the little radio. 

“'Cause all I can taste is this moment and all I can breathe is your life. So and sooner or later, it's over…I just don't wanna miss you tonight.”, Eddie sang softly before kissing his cheek. “I love you, Steve Harrington.”

***

The sound of thunder startled you awake and as soon as your eyes snapped open they were met with fangs and black eyes staring down at you. His hair was hanging in front of his face and he was still in just his jeans with no shirt. The man’s cold hands were pinning your wrists to the mattress as he hovered over you bent at the knee straddling your waist. 

“Steve?”

He growled loudly at the sound of your voice causing the vampire beside you to jerk awake. 

“Jesus Christ… it worked.”, Eddie murmured, his eyes quickly taking in the situation before him. “Sweetheart, are you alright?

Steve didn’t move or make an indication that he heard him at all. 

“Baby, I can feel how hungry you are. I can take care of you, ok. You don’t need to feed on her.”

You squeaked when his body abruptly shifted as he leaned down to sniff your neck.

“Steven…”, he warned.

“Pretty girl…smells good. Hungry.”

You tried to control your emotions but you couldn’t help the way your pussy clenched as his long, wet tongue licked a line up your throat to your cheek. Steve and Eddie groaned at the same time driving you crazy. 

“Mine.”

“Ours.”, the metalhead corrected. 

“Hungry.”

“I have food in the refrigerator. You can NOT eat her. She needs to be healed first. She lost a lot of blood yesterday.”

Steve snarled but Eddie wasn’t amused anymore. 

“You don’t talk to me or give me attitude, little boy. Vampire or not I’m still your fucking Daddy. Now, let her go or I swear to God I will punish you.”

The boy’s massive, strong palms ran along your head feeling the slight bump and dried blood that remained there causing him to growl again at a much lower register before biting into his skin and shoving his wrist towards your mouth. 

Steve moaned when your lips attached to him while you drank, his hips grinding subtly against your core. 

“Pretty girl. Hurt.”

“Yeah, Y/N got hurt trying to save you.” Eddie’s eyes fluttered as he tried to control all the intense emotions running through his body right now. He was so relieved that Steve was alive so to speak but he could feel his anger and hunger as well as his desire for you.

Grunting, he forcefully pushed you back against the pillows and glared at his partner with his fury filled black eyes. 

“Who?!”

“Don’t worry, baby. Daddy took care of him.” The boy nodded before baring his fangs and leaning towards your neck, hovering just so before snarling in frustration and squeezing your wrists tighter. “What’s wrong, Steve?”

“Need…permission…”

The metalhead let out a breathy laugh that bordered between pleasure and relief. His boyfriend was still in there, he just needed to coax him out the way Steve did with him many times before. 

“Y/N, princess, are you ok?”

“Yes, Daddy.”, you whimper causing the boy above you to smirk. 

“Ok, my good boy. You can have her but when I say stop you have to listen to Daddy, understand?”

Steve nodded, wasting no time as his head fell back beside your neck and his teeth pierced your skin. As soon as his hands released you, you desperately reached between your bodies to push down his pants and move your panties to the side, groaning loudly as you guided his cock into your body. 

“Fuck, Y/N.”, Eddie moaned. “I wish you…you could feel what he’s feeling. Jesus…”

Gripping the other side of your neck, Steve’s hips slammed into yours toeing that fragile border between pleasure and pain as you clung to shoulder. 

“St-Steve…”

The long-haired boy heard the whine in your tone as tears fell from your eyes. 

“What’s wrong, sweetheart? D-Do you need to stop?”

“Too much, Daddy.”

“Steve, you have to stop now, ok?”

The man growled when Eddie touched him causing him to growl back. 

“Steven!”, you shouted in a firm tone making them both freeze. “L-Look at me NOW.”

Doing as you commanded, he lifted his head and his eyes immediately softened when he noticed the streaks of tears along your cheeks. Wrapping your legs around his waist, you urged him to continue while cupping his face. 

“That’s it, baby. I can’t give…give you more blood but you can take me. I’m…I’m so sorry, Steve. This is my fault.”

His head shook as he blinked rapidly, his black eyes receding and his beautiful honey ones pushing forth.

“No…No, honey. This isn’t your fault.”

Hearing his normal, sweet tone broke you as you wrapped your arms tightly around him and he did the same. 

“Keep going. Please. I need to feel you.”

Leaning his forehead against your own, he steadily began thrusting into you again at a much gentler rhythm. 

“I love you, Y/N. Fuck, I can feel you everywhere. It’s ok. Everything’s alright.”

You both desperately panted into each other’s mouths as he felt your pussy tighten around him as you came, following close behind as you felt him fill you up. 

With heavy eyes, you tried to focus your vision but it was too much as the adrenaline left your body and blood loss caught up with you. 

“Sweetheart, no. Keep your… Baby?! Open…eyes…”

################

Flashes of memories hit you at once. 

“Bill, are you kidding? You can’t stay another week just so you can fuck your whore! We have a son to take care of!”

“Mommy.”, five-year-old Steve coos as she slams the phone done after his father hung up on her. “Everything’s ok. I love you.”

“Hey, dad.”

“What is it, Steven? I’m busy.”

Twelve-year-old Steve twirls the basketball in his hand as he carefully enters his dad’s office a bit more. 

“I, uh, wanted to tell you I made captain of the JV team.”

“Seriously? That’s why you bothered me? Get out of here and come back when you actually have something good to tell me.”

“Like we’re in love? You don’t love me?”

A teenage Steve’s hand falls from the girl’s face as she tells him their relationship is bullshit. It feels like his heart was shattered as he angrily leaves her behind in the bathroom. 

“Ahoy. Welcome to Scoops. I’m your captain Steve. What can I get you?”

“Jesus, that was both pathetic and sexy, Harrington.” The man’s eyes shift up to lock on the metalhead in front of him as his big, tooth filled grin almost blinds him. “Only you could pull that off, pretty boy.”

“Eddie, right? Mumford?”

“Munson.”, the long-haired boy cackles. “I’m surprised you remember that much, sire. It’s not like we floated in similar circles. Plus, you were also an asshole.”

“Yeah.”, he chuckles. “I was. Sorry about that.”

The guitar riff for “Iris” begins to play making Eddie roll his eyes. 

“What? You don’t like the Goo Goo Dolls?”, Steve teases. 

“No and this song is fucking cheesy as hell.”

Turning on the couch to face him more, the man brings the beer bottle to his lips like a microphone as he begins to sing. 

“And I don't want the world to see me 'Cause I don't think that they'd understand When everything's made to be broken I just want you to know who I am!”

The metalhead smiles as he playfully cringes causing Steve to laugh harder before crawling forward and placing a soft kiss on his lips. 

“Woah…”

“Fuck. I’m sorry. Did I cross a line? I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable. We can just forget it happened and—”

Ring laced fingers grab his cheeks and kiss him again but much more deeply. 

“What if I don’t want to forget?”

“Wait, Eddie. Wait. Um…”, Steve pants as he lightly pushes at his boyfriend’s chest, his cock getting harder as he watches him struggle to pull his lips away from his own. 

“What’s wrong, baby?”, Eddie asks as he tenderly runs his fingers through the man’s fluffy hair. “We don’t have to do this if you don’t want to.”

“No, no. I do. I just…I’m nervous. I’ve never…not been with a girl…ya know?”

The metalhead grins at his shyness as Steve’s face blushes bright red. 

“I’ll go slow, sweetheart, ok? If at any point you want to stop just say the word.”

After getting the go ahead, Eddie strokes the lube along his shaft a few more times before lining himself up with the man’s entrance and gradually sliding in. 

“Fuck, Steve. You’re so fucking tight.” Opening his eyes, he scans the man underneath him whose eyes had also been closed but his eyebrows and nose were scrunched together. “Look at me, pretty boy. How are you feeling?”, he asks when he does what he says. 

“S-So fucking good. Hurts a little bit but—Jesus—please don’t stop.”

“Wouldn’t dream of it.”, he teased, placing his palm behind Steve’s neck as he leaned his forehead on his own. 

“Fuck, Eddie. I love you, baby. Just like that.”

The metalhead’s movements faltered for just a second before grinning down at him and kissing his lips. 

“I love you to, sweetheart.”

“Oh my god, Steve! What—”

The boy pushes past Eddie into the trailer living room, his dripping wet frame from the rain drenching the carpet underneath his shoes.

“FUCK HIM! He thinks he can tell me who to be or who I can be with?! Fuck. HIM!”

Eddie grabs his arms and forces him to stand still as he looks him over. 

“Who the fuck hit you?”, he asked with a tone filled with anger. “Was it Tommy or fucking Jason?!”

“My dad finally caught up with the town gossip.”, he answered sarcastically as he bounced on the balls of his feet. “Said no son of his was going to ruin the Harrington name by fucking a guy let alone the town freak. I told him to fuck off and that you were perfect. He said it was either you or them. If I chose to stay with them I couldn’t see you anymore. I told them I loved you and he hit me. And of course, what does my mom do?! Fucking NOTHING!”

Steve fell to his knees and Eddie sunk down with him collecting him in his arms. 

“It’s ok, baby. Everything’s alright. You can stay here as long as you need to. Fuck your parents. You know Wayne doesn’t care.” 

Eddie pushed his boyfriend’s head into his chest, trying to soothe him as he continued to cry.

“Eddie! Eddie! No, no, no, no.”, Steve panicked as he slid to the man’s side in the upside down. 

“I tried, Steve. I tried to convince him to come through the gate with me. He said he needed to buy more time.”, Dustin sobbed as the earth shook around them. 

“Steve, we need to go.”

“Ok, come on, Robin. Grab one of his arms and…”

The girl looked at Nancy sympathetically unsure of what to do. Even she knew they couldn’t carry him through a gate in the ceiling. None of them had the strength especially after being grabbed by the vines. 

“Steve, come on. We have to go.”, Nancy urged, pushing down the guilt that weld up in her throat. “We can’t stay here.”

“Neither can he. We can pick him up and I can—”

“STEVE! I’m so sorry.”

“Hey Mina.”

“Hey Renfield. Draculaaaaa.”, you jest, smiling widely when you see him smirk. “Thank you boys again for letting me help with your site. I love doing this way more than any other customer service bullshit.”

“I can imagine. I used to work at an ice cream parlor and a video store. I know how crazy customers can be.”

“I hope it’s alright. Since you trusted me with your whole empire I thought I’d be more vulnerable with you both to.”

The little box with your name suddenly illuminated with your face causing them both to sigh at the same time. 

“So…this is me.”, you giggle nervously.

“Pretty girl.”

“Very.”, Steve followed, beaming when you blushed at their compliments. 

***

“There she is. Come on, baby girl. Open your eyes, please.”, Eddie urged as he gently rocked you in his arms, trying desperately to hide how worried he actually was. 

When your eyes met his, he breathed a heavy sigh of relief as he tenderly moved some of the hair away from your face. 

“Steve?”

“I’m right here, honey. I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean to take so much. This is so new to me and—”

Your lips cut him off as you crawled into his lap and collapsed shakily in his embrace. 

“Let me grab her something to eat.”

“I saw it. I saw everything… your memories flashed before my eyes. You’ve been through too much, baby.” He couldn’t help but smile as he kissed your forehead. “I-I-I felt the love you have for him. How many times you felt like he’s saved you.”

Eddie came back and handed you a granola bar but you just held it in your palm as you sobbed while shifting your focus to him. 

“It’s my fault you almost lost him. You both should just go. Grab your things and leave me and LA behind. I’m going to get you both killed.”

Steve growled loudly as he grabbed your face and forcibly turned you to look at him.

“Y/N, what happened wasn’t your fault. What happened with your ex and his asshole brother wasn’t your fault.” Realizing how he was holding you; he swallowed nervously and dropped his hands to your sides. His body twitched and Eddie felt the emotion as he lightly chuckled. 

“Yeah, do you see what I mean now when I said it aggravates me that you both feel guilty about things you couldn’t control. You two feel it so strongly to.”

“It’s so weird. It’s like I can almost hear her thoughts but it’s a feeling. You…don’t believe me when I say it’s not your fault. You think your mom’s right about you. That you just ruin everything basically by existing.”

As you looked away in shame, Eddie reached out to lift your chin. 

“I get what it feels like to think that. My dad was the same way before he went in but, Y/N, it kills me when I feel you feeling that because—”

“You can’t see how perfect you are… to us anyway.”, Steve finishes. 

Silently, you opened the treat he brought you as you waited for them to take care of you. Watching with studious eyes, Eddie licked his thumb and showed his boyfriend how he heals the bites, marveling when the wound disappears. 

“I always did it while you were both asleep.” The metalhead scooted forward and cupped Steve face in his hands as the shared a passionate kiss. “Don’t you ever scare me like that again, sweetheart. I love you so much, Steve Harrington.”

“I love you to, Eddie Munson.”

Series here

###################

@chelebelletx @mandyjo8719 @nailbatanddungeon

[ranbling]

I just want to put it out: Buck was really happy in the start of all his relationships, it's not something that's only happening with Tommy

He was giggling on his phone every time Abby called him, and was organising cute little dates for them

(well he might not have been happy when he got together with Taylor, but that's because Eddie just got shot) his and Taylor's relationship was happy in the beginning and only went sore after time

He felt like he had an instant connection with Natalia and that she was really seeing her

It's not to invalidate Bucktommy or anything, but stop acting like Buck was miserable when starting all his relationships

[mazzystar24]

I’ve seen discourse about buck and Eddie’s sexualities (whether each of them are gay or bi) and personally I think people should just let people have their own headcanons and stop being so pressed

Like I firmly believe Eddie is gay and in a post where I blabbered abt my reasoning I had a bunch of people who didn’t have that same headcanon replying with theirs in a very respectful and friendly way, not arguing about anything just saying how they see it without invalidating my opinion and those kind of interactions are how fandoms should be or at the very least just ignore posts with other headcanons

That aside if you wanna argue and do all that jazz please stay away from harmful narratives, yes these are fictional characters but if you’re saying shit like “people just want Eddie to be gay and not bi to feminise him” (something I saw on the blog of someone who was mocking in the replies of one of my posts about my headcanons) then you’re a dinosaur with backward views of sexualities for a buddie shipper

Also arguments that disregard the existence of comp het need to get out of the building, same with arguments that don’t recognise that many many many gay or lesbian people will have had sexual relationships with people of the opposite gender and have found it enjoyable doesn’t mean they can’t still be gay! Like yeah you can’t hurt fictional characters feelings and fictional characters don’t need their sexualities validated but some of the narratives y’all are leading with just insult an entire part of the gay community

Anyways that being said go have your own head canons, guys have fun, literally who cares and if you wanna argue about it don’t be a dick about it- don’t do it on people’s blogs who you disagree with and don’t make arguments that are ignorant ❤️

[69constellationsinatrenchcoat]

✨Welcome to 69 Constellations* in a Trenchcoat✨

*alters (our increasingly misnamed system blog, we don't have 69 alters.)

Welcome to CC's little corner of the internet. We go by Constellation, or the Consellation Collective. Formerly 69consellationsinatrenchcoat (lmao dumbass typo) & 69ottersinatrenchcoat

We have medically recognised dissociative identity disorder (DID), diagnosed PTSD, autism, ADHD, and a variety of chronic illnesses… we're a bit of a medical problem.

We tend to post a mix of things we enjoy and informative content.

A lot of our posts are posted from queue, so you may be speaking with a different alter than who is currently making posts and we aren't online all the time :)

.°˖✧ Posting ✧˖°.

Main topics: DID, OSDD & other CDDs, mental health, psychology, disability & neurodiversity

Side topics (aka a system's worth of interests, and this is no where near all of them): LGBTQ+, books, fanfic, heartstopper, zelda, minecraft, pjo, musicals, kaos, disney/pixar/dreamworks, taylor swift & other music, cats, philosophy, enneagram & mbti, poetry, art, dnd, hermitcraft, fourth wing, warrior cats, arcane, she-ra and the princesses of power, lord of the rings, marvel (specifically deadpool & wolverine, and agatha all along)....

more here

#totally missing some things, but that's okay

.°˖✧ Meet the Team ✧˖°.

Amber they/she (🔥)

Kaden, they/he (🐚

Kyle, he/him (💜)

Lillia, she/her (🪻)

Wild, they/she/he (🗡️)

Eddie, they/he (🌻)

Ash, they/them (🌿)

Following some concerns around privacy, we have removed all alter intros, apologies.

Some of us don't post here and/or don't want info up. They may post at their leisure, but will usually sign off in the tags with "posted by [emoji]"

Poster lists will remain incomplete, and alters go by pseudonyms for privacy.

.°˖✧ System Info ✧˖°.

We go by Constellation and use they/them pronouns. We're bodily an adult, bi, polyam (though we just say queer), and as far as we're aware, an INFJ 1w2 125 overall.

We post in British English, usually fkgkjgfkjk. Pls, stop saying we're spelling things wrong just because we spell colour with a 'U'.

We're studying to become a psychologist… which… is fun when you have experience with a lot of the things they talk about lol

.°˖✧ Syscourse ✧˖°.

If discussing system origins, we prefer to have measured and respectful discussions, or to avoid it all together.

We recognise that experiences with multiplicity and plurality vary drastically, and that spiritual multiplicity exists and is recognised in the DSM-V-TR, as are DID and OSDD.

Multiplicity is a controversial topic within psychological communities and that there are varying opinions on the existence of non-trauma sourced multiples.

We avoid the 'fandom' attitude to DID as we believe that we should not be watering system experience to the belief that it's fun to have alters, as it invalidates negative experiences. However, there is joy in this disorder.

As with every community, certain things shared in multiplicity spaces are completely false, and we disagree with on a fundamental level. For example, system hopping does not exist (alters, created by one mind cannot magically appear in another's mind unless that system has split an introject [factive] based upon that alter), selling alters is wrong, impossible and immoral, etc

To have DID, individuals must reach certain diagnostic criteria, including showing amnesia between personality states. Some clinicians argue that for a diagnosis of DID to be valid, one must also reach diagnostic criteria for PSTD, meaning you can't have DID without traumatic experiences - however, that does not mean plurality doesn't exist outside DID.

We want to see some solid research into all plural experiences (including those who report non traumagenic origins) but unfortunately there aren't many people doing the research.

There's enough evidence to suggest that plural experiences do exist outside of trauma and that suggests that something is psychologically 'unusual' with those who report plurality outside of trauma.

Traumagenic plurality and various non-traumagenic plural experiences are two different things, however there is overlap. Creating separate language for traumagenic multiples, and endogenic multiples is something we believe may help to create clearer divisions within the communitie; limiting confusion between when a systems is speaking about traumagenic experience, or endogenic experience.

A vast majority of young teens who identify as endogenic or plural without trauma are misinterpreting experiences as a teen by placing labels on things that may perpetuate harmful beliefs. We don't wish to dismiss anyone's experiences by stating that teens cannot be systems (they absolutely can be), however, certain parts of the online system communities, especially system related discords, can be harmful to developing brains and developing personalities.

That being said, we are a diagnosed DID system, and the majority of our posting will be about our experiences with DID, and we will, mostly, interact with trauma based posting. :)

TLDR: our syscourse stance is complicated and each alter in our system has different opinions on it — but basically we believe that endogenic systems do experience multiplicity, just in a different way to disorders like DID, OSDD and P-DID.

Remember, your brain doesn't finish the majority of its development until you're in your mid-twenties!

°˖✧ Tagging system ✧˖°.

#Posted by [emoji/name]: posted by that alter

#CC original post: an original post by someone in the system

#CC original poetry: original poems by us

#CC favs: favourite posts

#constellation collective theming

#CC important posts

this is all pretty self-explanatory

.°˖✧ Please don't follow if.. ✧˖°.

You are here with the intent to be homophobic, transphobic, queerphobic, sexist, etc. Please don't be an ass.

You're a neo-nazi. Just no. Fuck off.

If you are "transautistic" or support transautism (autistic trans people are welcome, I am referring to the bullshit that is transitioning from allistic to autistic; I am not wasting my breath explaining why that is impossible). Trans ID aren't welcome either.

You are under the age of 16. This blog occasionally contains sexual content (no visuals), experiences and triggering content, and we want to keep you safe. We aren't entirely happy with minors interacting but, 17+ is fine.

Do not interact with any of our content if you post screenshots to r/systemscringe. Yes, sometimes people do shit for attention, but mocking them publicly is not okay. Go away, you are not welcome here.

Our DMs are open :)

/// blinkie & flash warning ///

blinkies made using blinkies cafe

plain text: [medically recognised DID system], [this system is neurodivergent], [I ended up trans, don't ask how], [ambulatory wheelchair user], [disabled DID system], [due to personal reasons, this user is bisexual], [caution: stubborn fuck], [psychology degree loading..] [we like stars lol] [AuDHD], [chronically ill, chronically tired], [f*ck this shit], [healing takes time], [ironically we can't deal with blinkies due to flash sensitivity]

[smile, you're beautiful]

Profile picture made by us: flag link

[richard-michael-afton]

I'm going to say something controversial in the stranger things fandom. I don't like how Eddie fans treat people. I have seen many posts of people appreciating how complex and heartbreaking Billy's backstory is, or just draw him without further explanation and you assholes get so nasty about it.

"Remove billy and make it Eddie!!!" Or "ew I hate billy Eddie is so much better. Or "fuck Harringrove Steddie is the top ship!" And I get it. You have an otp. I'm glad your happy I'm glad Eddie makes you happy, but as a billy fan I don't go around other peoples posts about Eddie and tell you your invalid, or that Eddie sucks. So why should you? You guys are taking it to hateful levels which the character would hate irl. Please...let people enjoy billy. He helped me so much through my horrible childhood. I don't tell you to delete or replace part of your work, so don't do it to us.

Just....stop.

[strangersatellites]

i’ve been missing the universe from my first fic lately, so enjoy this snippet (my best comedic work yet) from tip of my tongue, he’s pulling my hair; i’d do what he wants anywhere

“Henderson, please do not get pizza sauce on my carpet!” Steve yells across his house at the man-child balancing boxes reaching higher than his head.

“Geez, Steve, relax, would you?” Dustin chides, “Why are you freaking out anyways? I have never once seen your house this clean.”

Steve spares a moment to feel a bit caught out. “He’s right,” he thinks.

He follows Dustin into the living room carrying a stack of plates. He is met with a sight he has grown all too familiar with over the years of the kids using his home as their designated hang out. Coffee table pulled out to the middle of the floor so there is optimal seating around its perimeter; Lucas, Mike, and Will already seated and bickering about Will’s campaign; Max and El on his couch trying to choose a movie to watch; and more D&D paraphernalia then he even understands or knows what to do with. The only thing currently missing are the rest of the adults of the group, all of whom are en route, hopefully with beer and other substances so that Steve can get through another night of fifteen year olds screaming until three in the morning.

“No seriously dude, you look like you’ve seen a ghost, what the hell are you being so weird for?” Mike asks about the time Steve realizes he’s moved the cups around the table three times.

Moving to stand at the head of the table Steve claps his hands together and places his hands on his hips in what the kids call his “mom pose”, deciding to make an announcement. They had originally planned on just introducing Eddie as a friend, and then getting a read from the kids before they told them anything more. But now that they have seemed to figure out that something is up, Steve is loath to keep the secret from them.

“Oh here we go,” Lucas whines.

Mike groans and Max and El perk up in their seats.

“Watch it Sinclair. Don't make me put you on trash duty.”

Lucas mimes zipping his lips shut.

“Thank you. Okay gang. I don’t usually ask you guys to be on your best behavior because my home is your home and all that shit. But today Robs is bringing over this guy that I have been talking to so I really need you guys to be cool.” Steve pleads with the group, feeling irrationally jittery even though he knows they can tell he’s nervous and would never do anything to actually jeopardize or invalidate his worries.

The girls on the couch both look like this is the best news they have ever heard. Meanwhile, Will, Lucas, and Mike all look shellshocked. Dustin is the only one who maintains some sense of a calm demeanor. Immediately diffusing the shock with an “Okay.. well we’re missing a D20, does anyone have a spare in a backpack or something?”

Steve just laughs as his panic is so quickly relieved with the normalcy of these kids, who all immediately take to looking under the table and under pillows for the missing dice. He takes a second to be grateful they all are so quick to support one another, himself included.

Steve, shaking off his shock, responds, “You know what? I think you guys actually left some here last time you came over to play, let me go grab them.”

“Sweet, thanks mom!” Lucas says to Steve’s retreating form, earning himself a middle finger over the shoulder.

On his way down the hall he hears the doorbell and the sounds of Jonathan, Nancy, and Argyle joining the party and making themselves at home. Steve thinks the most home this house has ever felt is when it is full of these kids and these friends.

Walking into his spare room Steve rifles through the top dresser drawer that has turned into some kind of makeshift lost and found, letting out a victorious “aha!” when he lays his hands on Dustin’s missing D20 and the various other matching D-something’s.

He stops in front of the mirror one last time on his way out to give himself a pep talk before Eddie comes over. It's not that he’s nervous to see him, but the fact that Eddie is essentially meeting his family today, and everyone that's important to him. Logically, he knows there is literally no way they won't like him, but a little bit of fear permanently stays lodged in his chest these days and today it's chosen to take root in this situation.

Making his way back to the rowdy table he drops the dice in Dustin’s hand with a flourish and goes to check his phone to see if the rest of the group are almost here. He is broken out of his task to Dustin’s “What the fuck?”

Turning to see Dustin still standing stock still with the dice in his hand Steve makes to reprimand him for his language before getting cut off with “These are Eddie’s.”

Steve freezes. Approximately a million thoughts and questions start running through his head, the most prominent he asks aloud, “How do you guys know Eddie?”

By now the rest of the party has clued into the situation, Lucas chiming in, “Eddie’s our DM when we play at Hellfire. How do you know Eddie?”

Steve stutters, trying to connect the dots.

“Oh my god,” Dustin screeches, “Eddie said he lost his customs after he was playing with a hookup. Was it you?”

Steve has about three seconds to be offended that Eddie referred to him as a “hookup” and to think that he needs to text Eddie a warning before the doorbell rings.

This time, everyone freezes, Steve sees the moment that the kids all suddenly remember that Steve said Robin was bringing a guy over.

Steve, still in shock, is rooted to his spot while Mike runs to the door, flinging it open to reveal Robin and Eddie. If Steve had his wits about him, he would be most interested in the fact that Eddie looks really fucking good in his worn old Black Sabbath tee and ripped jeans with his hair up, but as it is he is too busy reeling.

Steve watches with bated breath as Eddie’s eyes flit to all of the people in the room and connect the same dots that Steve did only moments ago. Eddie’s eyes finally land on Dustin’s open palm with his apparently custom DM dice and he goes to say “Oh shit! You found-”

“Your dice.” Steve finishes for him.

Again, he sees the moment Eddie remembers what he told the kids happened to his dice.

“My dice... Yeah.” He brings a hand up the scratch at the back of his neck.

All of the kids shake out of their shock at once with shouts and jeers of, “STEVE was the hookup?” and “Oh my god I can’t believe this is happening,” and from the girls, hushed giggles, the remaining adults all putting two and two together themselves.

Robin breaks the panic with, “I feel like I’m missing something here.”

Rather than rehash the entire event in front of the kids, Steve finally launches back into action and grabs Eddie and Robin and drags them into the kitchen.

“Oh my fucking god!” Steve screeches, dragging his hands down his face.

He feels Eddie’s presence behind him and feels one arm snake around his waist and another come to rest where his thigh meets his hip, and warm lips dropping a kiss to his neck.

“Why are you freaking out, baby? This is honestly the best case scenario. I’ve been so nervous all day about meeting your kids, come to find out your kids are my kids,” Eddie speaks lowly into Steve’s ear and honestly? He does have a point. But-

“I think I’m mostly freaked out that they figured it out before I got to tell them. I was fully prepared to make an awkward introduction and wait for you guys to hit it off. I was not prepared for all of them staring at me asking if I was the hookup you left your dice with.” And now that he thinks about it, maybe the world hookup is the part that is bothering him the most.

Robin seems to have finally pieced together the puzzle, “Ohhh, shit. These are the kids that always come to your D&D nights. You know, I honestly should have put this together earlier. Especially after that time you came into work talking about your dice getting you into some super kinky sh-”

“Robs!” Steve cuts her off.

“Sorry!” She squeaks. “This is just all so funny to me. Like how did none of us put together that the obnoxious kids that play at your house are the same obnoxious kids that play at Hellfire?”

Eddie laughs over Steve’s shoulder. “Yeah, I don’t even have an argument for that one. This seems like a massive oversight.” He says rubbing circles into Steve’s hips. “Well, at least we know your kids love your new boyfriend already,” and Steve just rolls his eyes, able to hear the smirk in Eddie's voice, “Nice save, Master.”

Steve shakes off a slack-jawed Eddie and makes to go back to join the kids. “Well, we may as well rejoin the kids and suffer through the impending torment.”

Robin and Eddie cackle behind him as they make their way into the living room.

Upon seeing the kids already in the throes of their game Steve just stands and looks out over the room at all of the people he loves and is once again, so grateful for each and every one of them and their ability to make him feel so effortlessly comfortable even at his most nervous.

He should’ve known better than to think Eddie would ever let him win though. He’s struck from his reverie, when he hears Eddie, in what is undoubtedly his dramatic DM voice, say, “Hey anklebiters! Do you guys need a Dad? I’m trying to un-single your mom!”

[allsortsedits]

Love Notes

Pairing: Eddie Munson x Gender Neutral Reader

Summary: Leaving love notes in Eddie Munson's locker for your friend turns sour when you find out she's not being sincere about her feelings

Warnings: Bullying, Jason Carver (I think that's it?)

It surprised you really. When your best friend confessed to you that she had a crush on a certain metal head. She’s a cheerleader and you always hear her make fun of him. Agreeing with Jason on everything. Calling Eddie a freak, a cult leader, a satinist

So when she asked you to help her write notes to put in Eddie’s locker you didn’t know what to do. She’s your best friend and you wanted to help her. You just thought it was strange to see her sudden change of heart. But since you believed her and wanted her to be happy you agreed to help her

The look of pure happiness that erupted on the cute metal heads face was hard to miss. A slight blush crept to his cheeks about having a secret admirer. Then suddenly his face changed expressions from happiness to sadness in a matter of seconds. Who the hell would be writing him notes like this? Leaving them in his locker? Surely it was a joke. A cruel, horrible joke

He thought the notes would stop but they didn’t. They kept coming and kept saying sweet nothings he’s always wanted to hear. Someone actually liked him. HIM. Eddie Munson. The notes were so pure and sweet. Someone liked him for being himself. He wondered who would write such beautiful notes. He wondered who in the god-forsaken hellhole of a school actually genuinely liked him. Wanted him

“So Quinn, when are you going to tell Eddie that you like him?” You ask your friend. It’s been a while since you started writing the love notes for your friend. You couldn’t tell her that you also in fact were crushing hard on the curly haired boy. So everything you wrote came from the heart

“Soon. Can you write a note telling him to meet me at the diner this Saturday? I think it’s time Eddie knew who his secret admirer is” Quinn smiled at you sweetly. You were excited to write this note. Finally your friend is going to confess

It was the last period of the day and you were scoping the library for a worthy read. A voice behind gives you a fright as you weren’t expecting anyone to be here

“Need a recommendation? Or is the freak's opinion invalid?” Eddie says coming up behind you. He sees you jump a little bit at the sound of his voice

“Sorry didn’t mean to scare you” His voice turns soft. He really didn’t mean to scare you. He thought once you knew who was speaking you would turn your heel and walk away. But to his surprise you didn’t. You stayed planted right where you were

“Oh no! It’s okay. Just wasn’t expecting anyone to be here” You let out a little laugh and you see Eddie smile. Damn that smile. You swore it made the room look brighter somehow. Quinn was one lucky lady. What you would give to have Eddie smile at you like that everyday

“So need a recommendation?” Eddie asks again standing beside you. He starts to lean back on his heels and comes back on his toes. He does this a few times and you can’t tell if it’s nerves or if he just can’t stand still. He watches you looking at the bookshelf of books in front of you. He didn’t seem to understand why you of all people would be friends with a girl like Quinn. Quinn seemed mean and was only nice when it gave her points to the teachers. You on the other hand seemed to be nice to everyone you saw. No matter who they were. You were nice to Jason despite him being an asshole. But you were also very sweet and kind to Dustin and Mike. Giving them lifts home when Nancy or himself were unavailable to do so

“Yeah. I just don’t know what to read” You look lost at all the books layed before you. Most you’ve read anyway but you wanted something new

Eddie flings his bag around to his front and digs inside. He pulls out a tattered looking book that’s definitely seen better days. He hands it to you and you gratefully take it

“It’s called The Hobbit. It’s my favourite book. You can borrow it if you want to read it?” He doesn’t take his eyes off you as you read the blurb on the back

“Thank you Eddie. I would love to borrow it” You finally look at him and give him a smile. He felt his knees weaken at the simple gesture. You knew his name. And you said it without disgust or disdain in your voice

“You know my name?” He asks confused. Usually people just call him freak

“Of course i know your name. I’ll return your book when i’m done. I’ll look after it i promise” You give him another smile as you leave the library. Eddie watches you leave. It was the first act of kindness he’s received from anyone like you. It seemed so genuine. The way your smile reached your eyes. He swore the library looked brighter when you smiled. And you smiled at him. It was for him

As the bell rings for the end of the day Eddie makes his way back to his locker to gather his Hellfire stuff for tonight. There shoved in his locker was another note. It’s been going on for weeks now and Eddie has kept every single note. Whoever was giving them to him wrote the sweetest, kindest things he’s ever heard. And they were all about him. Someone in this school likes him. His felt his heart skip a beat when he read the note

The smile and warmth he felt spread through his chest was something unexplainable. He’s never felt like this before and clearly whoever wrote them thought the world of him. Like he wasn’t just some freak or cult leader. It was almost like they saw through his thick skin and saw Eddie. Just Eddie

He slams his locker shut and carefully puts the note in his bag. He’ll put it with the others tonight when he gets home from Hellfire.

You and Quinn were hanging out at yours. Just talking about whatever you had in your minds

“So Quinn, how long have you liked Eddie? You never talk about him” You start poking around. Quinn is your friend sure but something didn’t seem right. She’s never mentioned or talked about Eddie

“Oh that freak? No darling I don’t like him. Jason has a plan to show him that no one could ever like a freak like him” Her voice dripping with disdain. Her face filled with disgust

Your heart shatters. You’ve been writing down your own personal thoughts about Eddie to help your friend get with him. And now you’re finding out she never liked him. She’s doing it to humiliate him. And the date was tomorrow. How could you tell Eddie? You had no idea where he lives and you don’t have his number

“Quinn I think you need to leave” You snap. You’re getting angry. You didn’t really know Eddie that well but you knew him well enough to know he didn’t deserve this

“What? We were going to have a sleepover!” Quinn exclaims. She’s clearly not happy with getting kicked out of your house. She watches as you pack up her things and drop them in her unexpecting arms. You glare at her and she turns around and leaves. You hear the front door slam shut and suddenly you could feel your eyes fuzz up. Hot tears spilling from your eyes. You angrily wipe them away and take some deep breaths. You couldn’t let this happen

You get under the covers and pull out Eddie’s book. You were nearly finished and you could see why it was his favourite. You finished it just before you fell asleep. It wasn’t a good sleep. You kept tossing and turning the whole night worried about tomorrow. Worried about what Jason and Quinn were going to do to Eddie

The next day Eddie was so excited. He told Wayne all about the notes and how he has a date with his secret admirer tonight at the diner

“Can you believe it Uncle Wayne?! I have a date tonight. Someone wants to be with ME!” He kept throwing clothes all over his room trying to find something nicer than what he usually wore. He wanted to impress whoever was leaving him notes

Wayne stood in his doorway unsure what to think. He thought it was odd that these notes just suddenly appeared. He didn’t want to voice his concerns to his nephew but he was just afraid this was all a trick. A prank to humiliate his nephew. It wasn’t the first time something like this has happened. He just hopes whoever is writing these notes is kind to his boy

“You should just be yourself Eds. Wear what you usually do. If the notes are true then they like you for who you are” Wayne steps into the bedroom and takes the clothes from Eddie. He lays out a band t-shirt, his black jeans and rebrocks. He gives Eddie a pointed a look who looks sheepish. He just wanted to impress his date. But he also knew that the old man was right. He should just be himself

Part of him thinks it was you writing him those notes. A part of him hopes it was you. The way your eyes lit up around him. The way your smile reaches your enchanting eyes. Okay now he’s really hoping it was you

You arrive at the diner in time to see Quinn. You scan the room and see Jason and his goons hiding in the corner. You make your way towards Quinn with determination

“You can’t do this. This isn’t right” You stand over her while she’s sitting down. She bats her eyelashes at you

“You’re supposed to be my friend. Shouldn’t you be happy for me?” Her fakeness dripping in her voice. The outfit she wore left very little to the imagination

“He’s a good person Quinn. And i thought you were too. I was wrong about you. I don’t want to be around you anymore. You’re no longer welcome to my house” You saw a flash of hurt spread across her face but quickly regained a smile when she heard a bell ring indicating someone had come inside

Your gut wrenches as you see Eddie. His eyes meet yours and for a split second you saw him smile. But when he sees you hovering over Quinn it’s quickly replaced by confusion. He finally makes it to the booth

“You can leave now. My dates arrived” Quinn smiles sweetly at Eddie who looks shocked. He sits down across from her and looks up to you

“Eddie I-“ You were cut off by the waiter who asked what the happy couple wanted on their first date. You realised he was in on it. The waiter shoved you aside and you decided to leave. They weren’t going to let you get a word in. They weren’t going to let you ruin what they had planned. You headed to the park to clear your thoughts and tried not to think what’s happening

“You were the one leaving the notes in my locker?” Eddie asked. He didn’t expect someone like Quinn to be leaving him love notes. She didn’t seem the type. He knew her reputation. He got a sick feeling in his stomach and he wondered if you were going to warn him before you got pushed aside

“Of course handsome! How could I not?” Quinn’s voice is dripping with sweetness. Batting her eyelashes at the boy making him flustered. He doesn’t know what to think. He thought it was you. But he was wrong. It was Quinn

The milkshakes and cream pie were quick to come to the table. As Eddie nervously drinks his drink he notices Quinn just watching him

“I didn’t think someone like you would be interested in someone like me” He laughs a little to lighten the mood

The screech of the chairs were heard and Jason and his goons were right there standing beside Quinn

“Is this freak annoying you babe?” Jason squeezes Quinn’s shoulder in affection. She leans into his side making Eddie even more confused and nervous than before

“Yes he is” She shoots daggers at Eddie

“You invited me! You were the one who wanted to go on a date!” He spluttered. He didn’t want to be blamed for something he didn’t do

“Oh god! I could never write that sappy shit about you!” Quinn laughs and Eddie turns embarrassed. If Quinn didn’t write the letters who did?

“No that was Y/N, who left. I don’t know how they came up with that love crap. Can you imagine if THEY liked you?” Quinn let’s out a bigger laugh and the group joins in

Eddie sinks into his chair. Quinn leans forwards towards Eddie

“Who could ever love a freak like you?” She sneers

Before Eddie could react he felt the drinks being poured on top of him and the cream pie getting smeared all over his clothes. The group and the waiter laughed

Eddie stands up and leaves without saying a word. His eyes pricked with tears. He doesn’t want to cry but he does. He really thought someone liked him for him. But this disaster of a date was humiliating enough to make him believe no one could ever like him. Not for himself. Not ever. He would always just be a freak

Your phone pings at a message Quinn had sent you. You open the attachment and it’s Eddie being humiliated. Quinn just sent heaps of laughing faces. Your heart sinks and you feel sick

You hear some leaves crunch and you turn. It’s Eddie and you can hear him sniffing trying to contain the sadness and humiliation he’s endured. You get off the swing and place Eddie’s book in your bag. You approach him carefully

“Eddie?” You ask softly

He jumps a little but relaxes when he sees it’s you. He’s seen how you treat other people and for some reason he believes that right now you’re the only person who wouldn’t make fun of him. Who wouldn’t make him hurt more then he already does

“I’m so sorry. I tried to get her to stop. I asked her to stop. And then you came and i tried but-“ You start to ramble but Eddie cuts you off

“I know. I should’ve known it was too good to be true” He shrugs his shoulders

You frown. He’s had that much rejection, that much humiliation, that much ridicule in his life that he doesn’t believe he deserves something good

“You heading home?” You ask. He nods his head

“Let me help you?” You offer. His eyes spark an interest. He nods his head and you both head towards his trailer

“My uncle isn’t home. It’ll just be the two of us” He says as he opens the door to his home and invites you inside. He’s never had people over before

“Go have a shower and leave your clothes by the door. I’ll put them in the washing machine” You give him a small push to the shower. While you wait you sit on the couch twiddling your thumbs. Once you hear the plop of clothes you get them. You throw them in the washing machine and turn it on

Eddie comes out of the shower with the towel around his waist. You tear your eyes away quickly. Hiding your blushing face and Eddie’s beet red face

When Eddie comes out he looks more comfortable in just a band shirt and some pants. He sits down next to you on the couch

“I know you were the one writing the notes” Eddie says quietly and softly

You stiffen up slightly and Eddie notices. He changes his position so that he’s facing you now. You refuse to look at him. Embarrassed that you played a part in his humiliation

“Why did you write them so Quinn could take credit?” He gently holds your chin in his hand and makes you face him. His face is soft and curious. You sigh and he lets his hand fall away once he knew you weren’t going to look away

“Because I was stupid and believed that she liked you. She said she couldn’t put it into words and just said stuff like ‘write about his eyes’ ‘write about his smile’ but I wrote what I thought”

“Because I didn’t speak up and tell her that I liked you too. I couldn’t do that to my friend and i wanted her to be happy. I didn’t know what she was planning I swear! I would never do that to you” You ramble and tears prick your eyes so you shake your head wanting them to go away but they don’t. They spill out and fall down your cheeks

Eddie sits frozen. You like him. You wrote what you thought about him. You liked his brown eyes that resemble that of a puppy. You liked his smile that makes the room get brighter. You liked his curly crazy hair because it’s unique. You liked the way he dresses because it looked cool and he suited it. You liked him. For being him

“Did you mean what you wrote in those notes?” He finally gets out. He forgot how to speak for a moment. He looks at you as you slowly nod your head. Yes

“I meant every word Eddie” You whisper and he nearly misses it but he hears you

“You like me?” He asks again. And he gets another nod. This time he just smiles and he watches as you smile softly back at him

“I need to hear you say it”

“Please” He holds your face in his hands gently. His eyes pleading for you to speak your feelings

“I like you, Eddie. I like you a lot” You keep smiling at him

He moves a little bit closer to you and leans his forehead against yours. You close your eyes and he does the same

“I like you too. And I was hoping the notes came from you” He confesses. He hears you let out a soft laugh. He could listen to that all day long

He gently closes the already small gap between you and kisses you. You kiss him back making him smile. His hands hold your waist while yours wrap around his neck. He gently moves you not breaking the kiss to have you sitting on his lap

“This okay?” He murmurs against your mouth

“Yeah” You reply breathless

He kisses you again and you tighten your grip around his neck pulling him impossibly closer. He is warm and comforting against you. His hands being incredibly gentle while holding you. You wouldn’t have guessed that from looking at him. You’re happy you get to experience this side of him

You both pull away when you hear someone clear their throat and the door to the trailer closes

“So i take it the date went well then?” Wayne is standing in the doorway watching the teenagers turn impossibly red. He watches as you bury your face in Eddie’s neck and Eddie’s hands rub your back reassuringly

“You could say that uncle” Eddie’s smiles massively. And it’s then that Wayne knows his nephew is in good hands with you. He’s never smiled like that before. He’s never had anyone over before. And here he is. His date on his lap trying to hide their embarrassment with his nephew smiling the cheshire cat

“You staying for dinner young one?” Wayne directs his question to you

“Is that okay?” You finally pull away from Eddie’s neck and look at his uncle

“Course it’s okay. We can get to know each other better” Wayne winks and gives Eddie a cheeky smile making his young nephew groan leaning his head into the crook of your neck and you laugh while stroking his hair gently

He pulls away and looks at you. He adores you. And you adore him

“Thank you for the love notes” Eddie tucks a strand of hair behind your ear as you give him a soft smile

“I can write more?” You offer as you caress the side of his face gently sending shivers down the boys spine

“Sign them this time” He takes your hand in his as you both get off the couch. He leads you to the dining table and sits you next to him

“I will” You promise. You give Wayne a smile who smiles back at you

Yeah

His nephew will be just fine with you

[robohintz]

“Ryan said Eddie is straight”

Where? Where did he say this?? He said Eddie likes women, big whoop- you know with the way y’all keep saying Buddie stans are trying to invalidate Buck’s bisexuality (which is the biggest laugh of the century since said Buddie stans are the ones who pushed for Bi Buck but ok) I would hope that you all know what the word ‘bisexual’ means.

Buck still likes women, he still likes women even while having a boyfriend, and if y’all weren’t so keen on weaponizing his bisexuality to argue with Buddie stans just because Buddie stans aren’t budging on shipping them (yes, everyone welcome to how fandoms and shipping works) then this conversation wouldn’t need to be had over and over again.

The same way you don’t like Buddie, no one is obligated to like your ship either just because it’s ‘canon’- let’s all move on!

Edit: So I was told that Ryan did mention heterosexuality in an interview, but not only does my point still stand- I had added in one of the tags about comphet and people should seriously look into what that means if they don’t have any clue about it, especially people who are just allies and are spitting mad that people won’t stop shipping Buddie hardcore.

[mermaidsirennikita]

ARC REVIEW: You Should Be So Lucky by Cat Sebastian

4.25/5. Releases 5/7/24.

Vibes: New Yooooork, romance so sweet you have to smile, love after loss, and like... I don't know how to put this... the feeling Bull Durham gives me but gay and less toxically masculine?

Heat Index: 4/10

Reporter Mark Bailey doesn't want to cover baseball, and he especially doesn't want to cover Eddie O'Leary, a former rising star who's been playing the worst ball of his life. But it may be better than staying at home and mourning the partner he never got to claim while he was alive. Eddie, on the other hand, is a bit perturbed about giving a personalized account of his current losses to an apparent snob. But as they travel around New York together, Mark finds himself giving some of his own story to Eddie... and falling in love in the process. It's impossible for Eddie to be out, and Mark doesn't want to be someone's secret again--what could their future possibly be?

I love Cat Sebastian, and this book gives me what I want from her: humor, swoony romance, and a richly described, fleshed out world. I've been really impressed by her ability to weave in a setting that really doesn't have a strong "background" in historical romance--midcentury NYC. The way she writes it feels both nostalgic and tangible; and it's not easy for historical romance authors to step out of the settings readers are more used to (Regency, Victorian).

There's something cozy and wry to the way Eddie and Mark fall in love, and I frankly adored their contrasting personalities. Young, somewhat bewildered Eddie, trying his fucking best all the time. Picky, somewhat pretentious, jaded Mark--just unable to stop himself from falling for Eddie's puppyish eagerness.

If you loved We Could Be So Good, you'll love this. If you're less familiar with Sebastian, I suspect you will, too.

Quick Takes:

--There's a rich history of baseball movies, right? Many of which are enjoyed by people who don't get baseball. As referenced above, I personally love Bull Durham (even if the stars are............................... hmm). I have no idea what goes on during baseball, but I do. This book works similarly. You can tell Sebastian knows what she's talking about, you don't have to understand baseball to get the book. It's portrayed in that kind of shorthand that's really about creating a vibe and a setting for the love story, which is so smart.

--I loved the way Mark's grief was depicted. It's arguably harder for him to move on with his life because so few people know that he is grieving, that he did lose his partner. And it's not treated as something that has to compete with his new love for Eddie, and it's not treated like something that's just going to magically go away. It's always going to be there; and it can exist beside his love for Eddie without invalidating it.

I find that a lot of romance novels involving widows and widowers downplay the previous spouse, and I get that. It's difficult to tell a love story that could be accidentally overshadowed by a previous one. However, that can be a little repetitive for me, and it was nice to read a book in which the romance was so tender and so REAL and so centered (there isn't much PLOT PLOT here--it's two people falling in love, there ya go) that also acknowledged that there was another tender and real love story beforehand. Plus, Eddie's understanding and lack of insecurity makes him even more lovable.

--In a lot of ways, this book is low stakes. It's mostly character, there isn't a lot of drama in the romance, they get along, and so forth. However, on the other hand... it does have very high stakes, right? Eddie cannot be a successful professional athlete while being out. Mark, who's kind of quietly out (and works at a newspaper that is pretty much aware of this and okay with it, through some stuff that has to do with WCBSG) understandably doesn't want to be hidden in the shadows. How do we address that?

Personally, I really liked how Sebastian did it. Balancing realism and romance is challenging, and I think she handled this without sacrificing either aspect.

--Ooooh I love people falling in love without realizing it, and damn, Mark does that. But you as the reader also kind of slip into them being in love, too. It feels totally natural. There's a real "that's the summer I fell in love" to this one, and I don't really know if that's going to make sense to a lot of people, but it does to ME.

The Sex:

The door isn't CLOSED, but it's kinda close to being there. You know exactly what's happening, and there are several scenes, but it's all sort of... implied. Even though you're there with them. It's all very romantic (and kind of titillating at points--it's so fun to see Eddie and Mark talk around sex and then get very blunt about it at points) but I would be lying if I said I didn't miss the heat level Sebastian wrote in The Queer Principles of Kit Webb. It's not ridiculous level of heat, it's just a bit more explicit.

Read this and get lulled into love--while also kind of wanting a hot dog? (Literally, not figuratively.) And to walk down a sidewalk in a sort of warm and nonexistent yet also very existent New York City? Talking to someone you're falling for, knowing that they're falling for you, while imagining kissing their mouth?

It's that sensibility.

Thanks to NetGalley and Avon for providing me with a copy of this book. All thoughts and opinions are my own.