#student lady gentleman and uh. something else

[birdmenmanga]

there IS a temptation to send my mother images of men having sex that I’ve drawn because I think it would honestly answer a lot of questions she has about me. but I say this while simultaneously feeling embarrassed about telling her my plans to make two guys roommates in a story. genuinely have no idea why the latter is embarrassing and why the former isn’t...

[andypantsx3]

i could literally die right now + either deku or kirishima, andie u pick!

Surprise I picked not Deku because I was scared lmao.

Falling | Kirishima/Reader

Prompt: “I could literally die right now” Word Count: 1220 words Tags/Warnings: pro hero AU, fluff, SFW Notes: Thank you @bobawithpomegranate for beta reading!!

It had been ten minutes since the last time you had felt your arm.

It was currently wedged sideways between the door of the subway and a particularly sour looking salaryman, whose scowl was so intimidating you didn’t dare ask him to free up some space for you. Not that there was any space for him to shift into, as the entire car was packed like a sardine can. 

You had no space to go either, balanced precariously over what looked like a college student dead asleep in his seat, wet locks of red hair spilling out from under the hood of his sweatshirt. This close, you could catch the lingering scent of some orange peel body wash, a welcome reprieve from the other smells that came with close train quarters.

He was cute, even with his features slack in sleep, a tiny scar over one eyelid, and looking bone-deep exhausted like he’d just come from an athletic meet. If the wet hair and telltale swell of muscle under his Crimson Riot hoodie was any judge, he probably had. Not that you had been staring long enough to speculate…

You were still looking—not staring—when the salaryman next to you shifted, and you felt the familiar prickle of blood flow returning to your arm. You wrenched your arm from between the man and the door—only to find that had been the only thing stabilizing you as the train lurched to a stop. You stumbled, hands grasping at the air in front of the salaryman. His eyes met yours, and in a moment that seemed to stretch for a small eternity, he moved minutely backwards.

Your hands clenched just short of the fabric of his suit and you tripped sideways. 

Directly onto the lap of the sleeping student.

The sharp bone of his knee slammed into the side of your thigh as you went down, hard, your cheek stinging where it met the jut of his collarbone. You were frozen in shock for a moment, limbs locked up, before you were sliding sideways, angled towards the floor.

There was a startled snuffling noise, and a strong arm locked around your waist, hauling you back up against a hard chest.

You cringed, flushing all the way down to your toes. “Shit, I’m so sorry—”

You looked up, only for your tongue to freeze in your mouth. Looking up at you was not a sleeping college student. With his eyes open and a small grin bearing those trademark sharp teeth of his, you suddenly realized exactly who it was you were using as a seat—pro hero Red Riot. 

Though he was fresh enough on the hero scene that it was possible for him to take the train like this without being recognized, you imagined it wouldn’t be long before that would have to stop. Though you knew little about heroes, even you knew he was rocketing up the ranks, fueled by his boyish charm, roguish good looks, and a frankly illegal set of washboard abs custom-made for magazine spreads.

Washboard abs that you could currently feel pressed up against the side of your arm.

Your brain rapidly entered panic mode and you tried to throw yourself sideways off of him, but Red Riot caught you again, laughing wryly.

“Careful there!” he said, “You almost ate floor. Wouldn’t want you to bang up that cute face of yours.”

Then he paused, seeming to realize what he’d said, a hint of a blush speckling his cheeks and the bridge of his nose. “Uh, I mean—”

Your brain went entirely offline as you gaped at him. Had he just tried to fan service you? How did he even know you knew who he was? Were you that obvious?

God this was so embarrassing.

“No, it’s okay!” you yelped, “You don’t need to apologize, I know my face isn’t actually—uh—you know. Anyway—thanks. Yeah, thanks for saving me, you—”

The crackle of the overheard interrupted you, the train conductor’s staticky voice announcing, “Ladies and gentlemen, I do apologize for the delay. We’ve got an obstruction on the track, we will be delayed just a short couple of minutes.”

Red Riot was staring at you through the announcement, a little wrinkle appearing between his brows. “What do you mean your face isn’t actually—? Actually what?”

Your entire face went hot. Oh my god, did he want to have this conversation? For real? You didn’t need reassurances, you needed to get off of his lap and disappear, stat. You wondered how feasible it was to pry open the doors and leap out into the subway tunnel, to disappear into the darkness and never be seen on the surface of the earth again.

That was the only solution here.

“This is so embarrassing, I could literally die right now,” you said instead, moving to clamber off of him. “I’m going to get off now, I’m sorry I fell on you.”

Red Riot’s arm clamped down, however, jerking you back against him. When you looked up at him, he seemed just as shocked as you were by the move.

“Sorry, reflex,” he said, shifting uncomfortably underneath you. It only emphasized the firmness of the muscles under you and you wondered frantically if the flames of your embarrassment might burn so hot that you would actually catch on fire.

The train conductor’s voice crackled back to life, “Ladies and gentleman, please don’t be alarmed. There is a fight taking place on the track and we have been asked to shelter in place. Please remain calm and stay in your seats, we will be passing along directions from the Public Safety Commission as they arrive.”

Red Riot perked up underneath you. “A fight! That’s my cue! I’m um, a hero—I don’t know if you’ve heard of me? I go by Red Riot...” 

You nodded vaguely. He knew you knew, didn’t he? Why else would he have said the fan service thing…?

Red Riot smiled, another flash of those sharp teeth. Then he stood up abruptly, hefting you in his arms and whirling to place you gently down in his seat, still warm from his presence. Your face went impossibly hotter, a weird fire starting in your abdomen at the casual show of strength. You stared up at him with wide eyes.

Red Riot smiled again, then rummaged around in his pocket for something, movements rushed.

“I, um, don’t have a lot of time right now. Gotta get to the fight,” he said, producing a pen. You wondered what he was doing with it, until he took your hand, flipping your palm up.

The pen pressed into the skin of your palm and you thought for a moment that he was signing his autograph, until he capped it. “Don’t feel any pressure. Only if you want! I just thought I’d take a chance since it literally fell into my lap. I’ll, um, maybe see you later,” he said. 

“If I don’t ‘literally die right now,’ that is,” he added, laughing.

And then he was gone, pushing through the crowd of people to get to the door of the train.

You looked down at your hand. In an untidy scrawl, he’d written:

Eijirou Kirishima

And underneath:

080-1XXX-5678. Date?

You covered your face, your cheeks burning. Oh yeah. You could literally die right now.

Current event masterlist in pinned.

[crackinwise]

This is a silly idea that wouldn't leave my head about Mondo being hesitant and Taka knowing exactly what he's about. Also I apologize to Leon.

The mixing of classes 77 & 78 in the rec room on a weekend should have been a chaotic party, but there was a certain Moral Compass in attendance who'd already vetoed many of the more rowdy ideas put forth.

The current spectacle was Nekomaru arm-wrestling Sakura. The intense screaming from the two made it sound more exciting than it was: they'd been locked in the same position for like five minutes now. At least Hina was happy cheering on Sakura's straining bicep.

Bored with it, Leon moved his eyes away from the stalemate to narrow them instead at Kiyotaka, who was being felt-up as he watched the match. Okay, not felt-up. That'd actually be fun. No, Mondo just had his hand on the hall monitor's upper back, thumb moving in slow circles.

Watching the couple in public was also a disappointment, in Leon's opinion. They'd been officially together a few months and their rules for "PDA" seemed arbitrary to anyone observing. They could look at each other in ways that'd make the most romantic person gag, but wouldn't even hold hands. It appeared Mondo was only allowed to touch Taka from the shoulder-blades up. Or that's all he had the guts to do, maybe.

Boring.

'Well,' Leon thought, 'I can at least work with this.' Messing with Mondo just enough to be entertained, but not enough to be killed, was a tightrope act. Say something the biker deemed a personal attack and he's a goner, but phrasing it as a challenge or dare could usually get Mondo to go along with anything. 'I just need the one carrying the braincell to leave.'

"Hey, Ishimaru!" Leon whispered to Kiyotaka. "I think I saw Souda spiking girls' drinks."

"WHAT!" Kiyotaka immediately left to find and possibly stomp the mechanic to death. Hopefully Ultimate Nurse Mikan was around.

"Ba--Taka?" Mondo called, confused at the sudden departure.

Leon swooped in and took his arm to pull him away from the main crowd a bit. "Mondo, buddy, want to have some fun?"

His buddy suspiciously glared down at him and answered, "Depends. What's yer idea of fun?"

Leon smiled, knowing the other's curiosity was a great sign for this plan working. "I noticed your wandering hands don't wander very far," he quickly waved his arms and continued when Mondo started puffing up to yell at him, "SO I wanna help you get them to second base tonight!"

Mondo deflated and stared.

"Y-Y'know, it's a baseball metaphor because I'm-"

"I KNOW WHAT THE FUCK SECOND BASE MEANS!" Several students turned to them, unimpressed, prompting Mondo to lower his voice again. "The hell are ya gettin at?"

"Well, either you got shy hands or Taka has you whipped. Which is it?"

"Is yer idea of fun gettin ripped in half, dude?"

"Er, let me start over," Leon back-pedaled quickly. He could do this. "What's stopping you from touching Taka more than a nervous twelve-year-old on the first date?" Shit. "Shit, wait, don't hit me! I'm just curious why you've been together so long and I've never seen your hands reach the promised land!"

The other boy paused with right arm still raised in mid-punch. "Wha?"

"By 'promised land' I mean his butt." Leon took a step backwards in case he had to dodge.

Something about that made Mondo briefly look more insecure, "One: I ain't lookin to get dumped. I still dunno how handsy he'll let me get."

Then his attack-dog mode returned and he brought his raised arm to his chest to crack his knuckles. "And two: if you've been lookin at Taka's ass, I'mma tie ya up in front of the fuckin ball machine an' leave ya there."

"What? No! Gross!" Leon had been, but it was like admiring a work of art, and also not the point. "I just want my pals happy! Trust me, every time you touch his back, go lower than before. You can watch his signals or whatever, but if you go slow it'll be fine!"

Leon was proud he sounded so supportive. It was a complete lie, of course. Leon was 99.9% sure the second Mondo passed the belt line, Kiyotaka would loudly explode at his boyfriend, making the guy explode right back, and ensuring Leon finally had his entertainment for tonight.

Leon just had to make sure he won his little Mondo game first, "You should at least try before he finds someone else man enough to grab dat a-"

"YA LITTLE SHIT!"

Whoops, Leon found himself suspended off the ground by his shirt. That's going to stretch. He shouldn't have gone the toxic masculinity route. But Mondo exhaled through his nose and set him back down when he saw Kiyotaka marching back over to them. 'Whipped.'

"Souda swore his innocence, but I've made all the ladies get new drinks to be safe! And Hiro is oddly asking everyone if they need ice but it's not for the drinks...?" Kiyotaka's expression changed from bemused to wary. "Uh, was there a problem here, Mondo?"

"Nah, y'know how Leon is," Mondo's voice was disgustingly soft all of a sudden. "C'mon, I think I see Chi playing a game."

As they walked away, Leon caught Mondo rest his hand on Taka's neck then slide down to mid-back without issue. Smirking, Leon adjusted his now loose shirt collar and followed at a distance.

An hour. A whole damn hour passed watching Mondo slowly achieve touching Kiyotaka's hip! Leon wanted to scream. He didn't mean go that slow! And Taka acted like he didn't notice or care either. Leon wished Souda really was spiking drinks so he could down three.

Sayaka appeared at Leon's side, startling the redhead. "You're disappointed in him," she stated.

"Of course I'm disappointed! Dude's a gang leader and he acts like the Ultimate Gentleman!" Wait. "Wait, what do you mean? How do you...?"

"Psychi~c," she sing-songed innocently before she pointed to the couple Leon had been stalking. When Leon looked over, Kiyotaka's hand reached back to purposefully guide Mondo's hand from his hip down the short distance to the swell of his behind, and kept it there.

What? The fuck? Happened? He'd been expecting jumping, yelling, possibly some face-slapping to get on video, but definitely wasn't expecting Taka to push Mondo to the goal line. Mondo himself looked dumbstruck.

'Sonuvabitch,' Leon thought. Good for them and all but what was he supposed to do, not tease them? He sauntered up behind the two and stage-whispered, "Oi! Ass-grabbing is not welcome in a school environment!"

They yelped and jumped apart, then just as quickly whirled on him. Mondo's red face especially said Leon was in danger, but it was Kiyotaka who spoke.

"We're outside of school hours, in the rec room among friends! If public displays of affection made you uncomfortable, you could have asked instead of disturbing your peers with vulgar mockery." His arms were crossed and his eyes appeared almost aflame. He was not happy being interrupted.

"Ha," Leon pointed at the proud model student, "It was just funny catching the school mascot initiate groping. You been wanting that a while?"

There was a low growl coming from the direction of Mondo now.

Sayaka grabbed Leon's shoulder and murmured a warning, "Kuwata, you should probably let it go."

He ignored her.

Kiyotaka's eyebrows furrowed as if ready to pounce and maul Leon's face. "It was not groping. Why is it surprising I'd want my partner to touch me?"

"Babe," Mondo had stopped growling at Leon to put all his attention on his boyfriend, "it was really ok? Ya knew what I was tryin t'do all night?"

"Of course," Taka said warmly. "You were only holding me, and I'm yours, so obviously you can-"

"M-MINE?!" Mondo honest-to-god squeaked.

Leon reacted just as loudly, "Did I just hear Taka imply his ass belongs to Mondo? Kiyotaka?? Ishimaru?!"

Whoops, he was being lifted again. Only this time Mondo brought him all the way to the door and literally threw him out.

"Owww. So much for my fun."

Sayaka sighed as she walked out to Leon and handed him something. "You can thank Hiro for the ice."

[emiefaunwrites]

I would really like to see Gonta content so maybe Taka gives him tutoring and they get distracted by the moths in the library or something? Or Leon and Gonta play baseball? Idk

ALSO YAY WELL DONE FOR DOING YOUR EXAM

Heyyy anon!

Ahhhh thank you so much! Freedom tastes sweet here!

And YESSSSSS I need some Gonta content too! I LOVE your idea! Imma use that and freaking RUN! I like to think that Gonta is an intelligent boy, but his reading and writing skills are that of a child. And so we will be running with this HC.

Sorry for the delay - I've been busier than expected! Managed to get home to see my family for the first time in 2 years so just settling back in!

Thank you so much for the ask and I hope you enjoy!!

************************

• Gonta Gokuhara is not dumb.

• He certainly THINKS he is, but it doesn't take a genius to see that it's not true.

• He has a vast knowledge of animals and birds, and coukd probably teach you so many tips to help you survive in the wilderness.

• But obviously, he has an incredible passion for insects and could talk ALL day about them.

• The little facts that he knows about bugs that have only just been discovered are amazing and always 100% accurate.

• So no. Gonta isn't dumb.

• He's just not academic.

• He struggles with speaking normally so forget the concept of reading and writing.

• He can do basic stuff but homework? Forget it.

• Exams? No chance.

• Presentations? You're having a laugh.

• And naturally, without doing the above things, his grades will start to fall.

• So obviously, the school assign him a student tutor.

• Who else but Kiyotaka Ishimaru?

• Gonta is so thankful for Taka taking the time to teach him. No one has ever really sat with him to teach him these things before.

• And a gentleman needs to be smart. No one is smarter than Taka!

• So they set their first session for later that week.

• Taka needs to get a basic understanding of Gonta's reading capabilities and so plans for them to head to the library.

• A place that Gonta has never stepped foot in.

• And WOW is it impressive!

• There's so many books here! Gonta wonders if there's someone who's read them all!

• But he doesn't have time to stare.

• Taka is waiting over in the reading corner and a gentleman never keeps someone waiting.

• As for Taka, he's impressed that someone is bang on time to his study sessions - most people, even Leon, are a few minutes late.

• So when Gonta announces (loudly) that he's here, Taka doesn't scold him for raising his voice in a library.

• The first half an hour goes smoothly.

• Taka has grabbed a variety of books and is a little surprised how fast he has to resort to children's books.

• Gonta doesn't mind though. He knows he's dumb and is profusely apologetic for being such trouble.

• But its fine! Taka will teach this boy to read more than just Peter Rabbit books.

• And his determiation makes Gonta that more determined too.

• But even the hardest of workers needs breaks.

• And as Taka heads off to the toilets, Gonta keeps on trying on his own.

• Until he spots a butterfly.

• It lands of the edge of the page and that's it. Reading over.

• It's been a while since Gonta's seen a plebejus argus! A previously common butterfly but over the years there's been less and less sightings of them.

• And she came over to see Gonta! What an honour!

• Holding out his finger, he whispers little words to the butterfly and lets it wander over his hand.

• They share stories of their life together and have little jokes.

• But the butterfly gets frightened when Taka comes over.

• 'No, no, pretty lady. Taka friend. Gonta like Taka. Taka no hurt butterfly.'

• Uh...okay? Taka knew Gonta was an entomologist but talking to bugs? He's not seen that before.

• But it seems to work as the butterfly, that's hopped into the air to flutter off, settles back onto Gonta's outstretched finger.

• Gonta smiles widely at Taka, spouting off insect facts at lightening speed (faster than Taka has ever heard Gonta speak before).

• Information Taka had no way of ever knowing - and he finds it totally mesmerising.

• And Gonta, who's not used to people actively asking questions, is beyond happy to share him knowledge

• He holds out the butterfly to Taka, who hesitantly holds his finger out.

• The butterfly seems to get scared and lifts of Gonta - fluttering around for a bit...

• Before landing smack bang on Taka's nose.

• 'Ah! Pretty lady like Taka! You friends now. Like Gonta.'

• Taka, although confused, finds this the highest compliment and flushes bright red.

• There's no more studying today - at least not for Gonta.

• And Taka has a much better idea on what to set as projects to help Gonta work now - bugs!

• (Bonus scene - Leon happens to be passing the library with Hiro and peeks in to see Taka laughing with a butterfly on his nose.

• And nearly dies of cuteness overload on the spot!)

[hyuniebaby]

Focus (5)

Pairings: Baekhyun x Y/N x Junmyeon

AU: College student! Baekhyun, Professor! Junmyeon AU, college!au

A/N: And a new character appears... 👀

@coffee-prince-kyungsoo

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5 | Part 6 | Part 7 | Part 8 | Part 9 | Part 10 | Part 11

As much as you wanted to stay in Mr. Kim’s office, you had to leave. He was looking extremely pissed off after finding out that you’ve slept with Baekhyun.

“Mr. Kim, I’ll - uh - go now.”

He didn’t even look at you, he was so lost in his thoughts.

You quickly left his office, breathing a sigh of relief once you shut the door. Whatever happened in that office was intense.

You can’t believe you’ve just sucked him off. You can’t believe you’ve sucked two men in a span of two days. You felt so dirty but for some reason, you liked it. You like how they made you feel.

You’re still hot and bothered from Junmyeon’s ministrations. You’re going to kill Junmyeon next time when you’re both outside the campus. He’s no longer an authority figure to you when he steps out of this campus. He’s dead meat.

You check the time on your watch and realized that it was still early. Maybe you could grab a quick drink and a quick fuck somewhere. But first, you have to clean yourself up and wear some panties.

As you got home, you plopped on your bed. Baekhyun and Junmyeon immediately invading your mind. How were you supposed to meet these two men tomorrow in Bio class? Were you supposed to tell Baekhyun that something happened with you and Junmyeon? Was he even supposed to know? Junmyeon knows about you and Baekhyun though... What if he reacted the same way as Junmyeon?

Ugh, they were driving you crazy. You definitely need a drink now.

You get off bed and proceed to your bathroom. You stripped off your clothes and observed yourself in the mirror. Fuck, Junmyeon gave you so many hickeys. You’re gonna have to cover it up with foundation and concealer. This adds to the growing list of why you should kill Junmyeon the next time you see him outside campus. You hated wearing makeup!

Deciding that staring at the hickeys won’t magically get rid of it, you step in the shower. Once you were done, you picked up the shortest dress and the highest heels you can find. You’ve been wild these days, you might as well embrace your new normal.

As you sat on your bed while trying to put on your heels, you see a piece of paper on your bedside table. Curious as to what it was, you reach for it and read it.

Y/N, I’m sorry I had to leave early. I enjoyed last night. - B

You didn’t know what to make of the letter. Was it supposed to be a thank you, goodbye? Was it supposed to be a let’s do this again next time? You decide that you’re going to dwell about it some other time. You want to forget about Baekhyun and Junmyeon tonight.

You go to your vanity and start putting on your makeup. You initially wanted to do subtle makeup, but you remembered that tonight, you were going to go wild, so you put on your red lipstick, and went with a smokey eyeshadow look. Once you were all set and done, you grab your phone and purse and went off to the bar.

You went straight to the bartender for drinks. You immediately down two glasses of whiskey. You take a good look at the place before you felt a pair of eyes looking your way. You look for the source and found the man who was looking at you. You both held eye contact. He was attractive, extremely attractive. Immaculate, even. He was tall and lean. He makes his way towards you.

“Why’s a lovely lady drinking alone?”

“Just a bad day.” His face looks better up close. “What about you?”

“I just wanted to drink. No reason.”

There was a moment of silence before he says, “Sehun. My name is Sehun.” Sehun, even his name sounds as good as his looks, you thought. In response, you tell him your name.

“So do you want to share with me what’s bothering you, darling?” The words rolled out of his mouth soothingly, you suddenly had the urge to spill every little thing that has been bothering you. So you did.

In the midst of telling him everything, you got overwhelmed and started drinking more. He tried to stop you but you wouldn’t budge. When you got everything out of your system, you were slurring your words.

Sehun was a nice man. He was a gentleman. He wasn’t just going to leave you alone. Based on what you’ve said tonight, your problems stemmed from sleeping with two men. He knows fully well that you don’t need another person to mull over. So he grabs your phone surprisingly you didn’t have a password for it and randomly dials a contact from your phone. Fortunately for you, it was Mina who he has been able to reach. He tells her about your state and where you were. Mina tells him that she’ll pick you up in five minutes.

“Y/N, your friend will arrive here soon to pick you up.” Sehun helps you stand up. You immediately cling to him. This was the moment the Sehun knew you were clingy when you’re drunk. What ever happened to the woman who looked so lonely earlier?

“Sehunie is so warm.” You slur. “Sehunie is the best. He listened to me all night without judgement. I hope Sehunie won’t ever feel lonely.”

He got flustered by how you said these words. No one has genuinely said these words to him ever. It was heartwarming to say the least.

“I-is Sehunie single?” You hiccup.

As if on cue, Mina arrives at the bar and claims you from Sehun. She thanks him profusely for taking care of you. She takes you to her apartment and cleans you up and lends you her softest pajamas. You dozed as soon as your head hits the pillows.

You wake up with an intense headache. When you opened your eyes, the first thing you saw were yellow curtains. You internally panicked upon realization that you did not have yellow curtains in your room. You look around the room and realized you were in Mina’s apartment. You sigh in relief.

You walk to the kitchen and find Mina cooking soup. “What happened?” You asked her.

“Before anything else, eat this and drink this.” She hands you a bowl of the soup she prepared and some pain reliever. “Secondly, I should be the one asking you what happened.” She gives you a pointed look.

“Well remember the professor who thought I was doing something with Jongdae in the janitor’s closet? After class I went to his office and I got scolded. Like the embarrassing kind of scolding.” You say, exaggerating a little bit. “You know I hate being scolded. Especially for something I know I didn’t do.” You frown. “So yeah I was so upset and wanted to drink everything away.”

You pause, trying to remember what the hell happened last night. “And then I remember drinking a lot... and... I think I met a guy?”

Mina listens intently to your story. Feeling sad that you were going through this alone. She could’ve been there for you.

“Hmm... Sehun? I think Sehun was his name. But I don’t remember what happened next.” You pout.

“You know you could’ve called me, right? You don’t need to keep these kind of things to yourself.” Mina says softly. “You’re lucky this Sehun guy wasn’t a creep! You were so out of it last night, something worse could’ve happened to you!” Mina scolds.

“I know, I know. I’m sorry”

“It’s okay. Next time call me or Joohyun or Seulgi. You know we’ll drop anything for you. Especially if there’s alcohol involved.” She teases. You laugh at her statement. Feeling a tad bit better than last night.

You let Mina know that you have classes by noon. She tells you to just borrow some of her clothes so you don’t have to go back to your house. After all, she lives just around the block of the campus.

The only problem for you was that Mina’s clothes are composed only of crop tops, skirts, dresses, and skinny jeans. You suppose it’s okay if the crop tops were the loose type, but they weren’t... Mina was nice enough to lend you her clothes so you opt to wear the fitted crop top and the skinny jeans. You don’t dare wear a skirt or dress because well these were the type of clothes you wore when something happened to you and the two men.

You bid good bye to Mina. You apologized for the inconvenience and thanked her for helping you out.

There were so many thoughts running through your mind as you walked towards your class. You walked with your head low while you try to massage your head. The throbbing of your head was still there and the unnecessary thoughts were adding to the pain you were feeling.

You ran into someone and you automatically apologize. When you look up, it was the guy from last night. He was getting some books from his locker and you literally crashed into him.

He was about to snap and say something in the lines “Watch where you’re going.” But he sees you. A look of shock was evident from his face, then his face relaxes and shifts to an amused look.

“Sehun?”

[villainousshakespeare]

In The Timing

Tom Hiddleston/Reader

Rated E 

Warnings: Smut, Angst, *But in this chapter only FLUFFFFFF with a teasing mention smut 

Chapters: 4 of 4 + Epilogue

After a horrible first date, you end up at a pub filled with University students. You are feeling rather old and sorry for yourself, until a blond haired Adonis strikes up a conversation with you. Obviously he is too young for you, but what could a little flirting hurt?

@yespolkadotkitty @hopelessromanticspoonie @nonsensicalobsessions @caffiend-queen @thecutestlittlebunbunfairy @vodka-and-some-sass @arch-venus25 @devikafernando @devilish–doll @hiddlesholic @just-the-hiddles @kellatron55 @myoxisbroken @wrathkitty @shae-annelore @kellatron55​ @from-hel-i-with-love​  ciaodarknessmyheart

Chapter 1 - First Meeting

Chapter 2 - The Morning After

Chapter 3 - Years Later

Chapter 4 - Time’s Up

Epilogue

"Ladies and gentlemen, you know my first guest as Loki the God of Mischief and The Night Manager. His new movie,  In The Timing, is currently nominated for a slew of awards, including the Oscar for Best Picture. Please welcome back to the show Mr. Tom Hiddleston."

You smiled as Tom jogged out onto stage to thunderous applause. Or maybe "thunderous" wasn't quite right. Thunderous implied deep, and the cheers for your man were much higher in pitch, clearly spearheaded by all of the overeager women in the audience. You couldn't really blame them. In his monochromatic blue suit and leonine mane of hair, Tom was definitely scream worthy. Still, that didn't mean you wouldn't take great delight in teasing him about his status as heartthrob later.

The response to  In The Timing had been incredible, with glowing reviews and box office receipts that were much higher than expected for an independent romantic comedy. Now, with the studio making a push for it on the awards circuit even more people were coming out to see the movie that was your labor of love in more ways than one.

All of this was wonderful for you and Tom, as you were both receiving accolades and prizes for your disciplines, but it also meant an endless round of press junkets, talk show appearances, and gala screenings all around the world. Most of the weight of this, of course, centered on Tom's deliciously broad shoulders, but you had your own share of speaking engagements as well. To your amusement, he had insisted that the studio coordinate your schedules, so that you were promoting in the same city at all times. He had just gotten you back, he insisted. After seventeen years apart he was not going to spend one night separated from you if there was anything he could do about it.

You were only too happy to go along with this plan. The state of pure euphoria you had been coasting through your days in had come to a screeching halt the first time you were asked to get up onto a stage in front of a thousand people and answer questions about your process and the characters you had imagined. Only Tom, standing to one side of the stage like a proud and nervous papa watching his child win her first spelling bee had kept you grounded. Every time you started to falter, you would look over and see him practically speaking for you with his body language. It would make you giggle inside how earnestly he watched you, reacting to the questions with amusement or indignancy on your behalf. What did it matter, you realized, what anyone else thought of you, when the over grown ginger in the wings believed in you so completely.

That didn't mean, of course, that you would let him off the hook for the swooning fangirls. Someone had to keep his head from becoming too big to fit through the door.

"So, Tom," Colbert was saying as you focused on the interview, "I hear you've got a new picture out."

"I have," he answered with a smile, playing along with one of his favorite hosts. Between the Hank Williams duet and the Hamlet soliloquy, Colbert was right up Tom's alley.

"Yeah, I hear it's pretty dreamy. Or rather you are pretty dreamy in it."

"I don't know about that," Tom chuckled with humility, face going a bit red. "I don't know who would have told you such a thing."

"Oh, my female staff, my daughter, my wife..." Stephen deadpanned as the audience laughed. "What is it about this film that is so... I believe the word was "swoony"."

"Swooy? An excellent word. From the old English geswogen, meaning "in a faint"" you rolled your eyes as Tom pontificated.

"If you say so," Stephen laughed.

"I would say that it's the waistcoats, Stephen," Tom said with an impish grin. "They are rather constraining, depriving the wearer of appropriate oxygen. Hence the swooning."

"I see. Interesting. Now, this is a romantic comedy. Normally those are not big Oscar bait movies. Oscars tends to go more for tradgedy or history... the feel good tropes.

"Exactly," Tom laughed along.

"So what is it about this movie that makes it so appealing to awards voters? Is it the waistcoats?"

"Maybe," Tom smiled. "Maybe it's the waistcoats."

He was so charming, you thought you could feel the adoration from crowd washing towards the stage. He would be on cloud nine tonight, you knew. Tom feeded off of the energy of a crowd in a visceral way. It wasn't ego, exactly, or at least not just. It was the validation of his hard work, and the knowledge that he had shared something with an audience that had touched them on a personal level, made them experience something as a communal group.

With a smug smile you wondered if he would be able to wait until you were back to your hotel tonight before sharing that excitement with you, or if you would have to find a closet or some other private room to slip into for half an hour or so. Over the last few months there had been a number of times when, sometimes for no other reason than a look you had thrown at him, Tom had siezed you by your wrist and dragged you to some semi-secluded spot to have his way with you. Hell, once or twice you had even been the one to push him into an alcove and reach for his zipper. Your relationship all those years ago had been marked by insatiability for eachother, and if anything the years apart had only added to the ferver to touch, taste, and fuck eachother senseless.

"Along with the costuming, which is brilliant - bless our wonderful costuming department - I think the thing that sets this movie apart is its writing," Tom was saying, throwing an adoring glance in your direction. "It really gets to the heart of what it means to be in love. How we, as human beings, with all our foibles and idiosycrosies can be our own worst enemies in the persuit of our heart's desire."

And seriously, how could you not love this man to distraction? 

"The course of true love never did run smooth," Colbert threw in.

"Exactly. Shakespeare said it best as usual. But do you know which character that was?"

"Helena, Midsummer Night's Dream," Stephen said uncertainly.

"Close, very close," your walking Shakespeare anthology smiled sugly. "Hermia. Act I, Scene 1 I believe."

"I'll take your word for it," Colbert surrendered to the master. "So, you're nominated for a slew of awards - a BAFTA, a SAG, an Oscar... is there anyone that you are really gunning for? It's the Oscar right?"

"Well, sort of," Tom hedged.

"What do you mean sort of?"

"I am enormously flattered to be nominated for all of them, of course, and so excited for the film to be recieving so much love. But the award I'm most excited for isn't an acting award for me, or even Best Picture. It's the Adapted Screenplay Award."

"And why would that be, Tom Hiddleston?"

"Well, as I mentioned before, the writing, particularly the dialogue, is truly the star of this picture."

"Uh-hu. No other reason?" the host prodded. "I know you're a private man when it comes to your relationships..."

"With reason, you have to keep a bit of life for yourself."

"Of course. So, what do you want to share with us Tom?"

"Well, it just so happens that the writer of this particular movie is someone very close to my heart," he smiled a dopey smile that made your stomach do filp-flops.

"How close exactly are we talking?" Stephen asked, also shooting you a look.

"Well, Stephen," Tom grinned, "it just so happens that this particular author, this beautiful, brilliant, compassionate woman, has recently become closer to me than people may realize."

"Really?" Stephen grinned back at him. "You know, it just so happens that I see her standing there in the wings. Shall we invite her out here?"

"Well..." Tom threw you a smile, eyes saying that he knew he would be in trouble later, "I really do think that she deserves to be the one sitting out here discussing the movie. She is the reason it is a success after all."

"What do you think ladies and gentlemen?" Stephen asked the audience as you glared at both of them. "Shall we bring her out?"

As a chorus of enthusiastic yeses assailed your ears, you vowed that you would make Tom pay for this later, possibly ususing the pair of fur lined cuffs he didn't think you knew he had purchased when you were strolling through the village the day before. Resigning yourself to your fate you sighed and nodded you head once to their entreating glances.

"Ladies and gentleman, she is the writer behind In The Timing Victoria Thomas," you still were not used to hearing your pen name spoken out loud as often as it was, or responding to it. You were going to have to do something about that soon, you thought.

"That is her pen name, indeed," Tom said as you walked slowly out on stage, glad that you were dressed in a chic Calvin Klien dress that flattered your figure, "I hope you will all join me in welcoming the newly minted Mrs. Hiddleston!"

  It had been a complete suprise. You and Tom had been walking through Central Park, Bobby frisking around you as he chased invisable prey. Your fingers were linked together, and Tom had at least somewhat learned to shorten his long stride to make up for your significantly shorter legs. After a bit of wandering, you had made it to the Shakespear Garden near both Delacourt Theater and Belvedeare Castle, and Tom had pulled you down beside him on a stone bench.

  "This garden," he told you conversationally, "has every flower the is mentioned in Shakespeare's plays planted in it."

  "That's so interesting," you teased, even though you did find it interesting, you loved to give him a hard time over his love of all things Shakespeare.

  "All of those flowers," he went on as though you hadn't spoken, "and not one of them is close to being as beautiful as you are."

  "Tom," you sighed dreamily, snuggling against his chest. Honestly, how had you gotten so lucky?

  "Darling," he said, a nervous tone creeping into his usually confident voice. "I wanted to ask you something."

  "What's that?" you said lazily, enjoying the smell of his skin as he kissed the top of your head.

  "Would you look at me love?" he asked.

  You lifted yourself off of his chest to see an anxious expression to match his voice.

  "I know that we have not been back together for long," he began, hands figiting, "but I think you know how much I love you."

  "I do," you smiled at him. "I love you too."

  "And we have, if you think about it, known eachother for almost two decades."

  "I suppose."

  "Given that, and that I don't think I will survive parting from you again," detaching himself from you, Tom dropped down onto one knee and your mind went blank. "My darling love, will you marry me?"

  You gaped at him in stunned disbeleif, unable to move or speak as the sun glinted off of his copper curls. As your eyes met his you saw a look of hope begin to shade into panic, and realized that you had not given him an answer. Just as you were wondering how mouths and tongues worked, Bobby barked loudly and jumped up onto the bench beside you, breaking the spell that you had been under. You burst out laughing, and after a moment so did Tom as Bobby licked at your face.

"Upstaged by my own dog," he grumbled good naturedly, some of his confidence coming back as you were beaming at him. "  B ut come, darling, ' what sayest thou then to my love? speak, my fair, and fairly, I pray thee  .'"

  "I say yes," you smiled at him as he rose to spin you off your feet in a circle. "Of course yes, Tom!"

  Two days later, in a quiet ceremony attended by just imediate family flown in secretly and his ever vigilant puplicist Luke, the two of you were married in the same spot by your fiesty dirctor Susie, who had obtained her liscense online for the occasion. It was peacful, and even if one or two persistant pedestrians had been able to snap a quick picture of you in your ice blue dress and Tom in a perfectly tailored Ralph Lauren suit, Luke had been able to keep any whisper of it out of the press. As gossip control went, it was a minor miracle.

"So, you two crazy kids tied the knot, huh?" Stephen asked as the crowd finally died down.

"Yes," Tom said quickly, looking a bit nervous. "Though as you may be able to tell by the expression on my beautiful bride's face, we hadn't made the announcement public yet."

"Oh that's okay," Colbert waved it off, "they won't tell, will you guys?"

The crowed laughed at the notion of it staying a secret after such a public announcement.

"Well, congratulations Tom, and to your lovely wife, my condolences."

"Oh, I think Tom's the one who's going to be needing condolences soon," you joked, and Tom gamely winced, though his eyes said he wasn't sure how much you were joking.

"So, why did you agree to marry such an obvious fixer upper?" Stephen asked you. "Couldn't you find anyone good looking?"

"It's a struggle, Stephen," you sighed and the audience laughed, as you had married, by your own reconning, the most handsome man on the planet. "But, well, I'm in love you see."

"Ah," he nodded sagely.

"Yup, I'm in love with Bobby, and the only way to get the dog was to say yes to the man."

"My evil plan worked, you see," Tom chimed in, laughing his endearing ehehe

"You used the dog to get the woman? That's next level planning!"

"Well you see, Stephen," Tom said, staring into your eyes with an intensity that made you forget you were on national TV, "I have been in love with this particular woman for seventeen years. And if it had taken adopting an entire three ring circus to finally get her to marry me, that was what I was going to do. Fortunately for our home, one adorable Spaniel was all it took."

"Seventeen years? Really?" Stephen looked back in forth between you, a wealth of unanswered questions in his eyes.

"Indeed. She led me quite a chase, but I wore her down in the end."

"I have a feeling there's a story here," the host said, in huge understatement, "but I'll wait until your next visit for that."

"I'm afraid that story is not suitible for television," Tom demured.

"Well, can you at least give any advice to the fans out there? Some help for the lovelorn?"

"Well, in the end," he said, giving it his usual deep thought, "all I can say is it's all in the timing."

"And that, my friends, is what we call a segue. You can catch the movie in theaters now."

Tom glanced over to you and winked with a cocky grin, and you thought of all the things that had gone between you, the years and passion and the love. You loved this man with everything you had. He might be insufferable, he might occasionally push you beyond your comfort level, but you knew in that moment and every moment that you were loved with a fierce, constant heart. It was the happy ending you had always dreamed of. And it was yours.

                       Notes:        

Thank you all so much for reading. It has been a wonderful story to write.

[imaginexmeintheuniverse]

Ceaseless Interruptions

Pairing: Cedric Diggory x Fem!Reader

Word Count: 3, 459

A/N: i just really like doing 5 times fics and i love cedric sooooo here's five times we almost kissed + when we finally did

i. the world cup

You’re overjoyed to conclude your summer holidays with attending the Quidditch World cup. And who better than with your best friends, the Weasley twins? Fred and George had invited you to come along with their family and Ron’s best friends.

Of course, it doesn’t hurt that you’re joined by the Diggory’s either. You and Cedric aren’t incredibly close, being in different houses as well as you being quite shy and all, but you did have the pleasure of encountering the Hufflepuff prefect on multiple occasions during your time at Hogwarts. He’s handsome, smart, and incredibly kind.

And yet you seem to become a complete flustered fool around him, usually keeping your interactions to a minimum to avoid making yourself out to be a total idiot. In retrospect, you mentally end up kicking yourself every time for rushing away so quickly when it seemed like he actually wanted to keep talking to you.

You’re quite proud of yourself for not doing the same today, although that might be because you’re all sticking together, but it’s still progress.

“Nowhere to run now, Y/N,” Fred had teased you earlier as your cheeks grew warm enough to boil water.

It’s now post game, and Fred and George are off celebrating their big win, the rest of the younger ones are in the tent, and the two fathers are out for drinks, leaving you and Cedric walking about. You finally have a real conversation with him and it turns out you have a lot in common.

You could stay up all night talking to him, but you also don’t want to worry the others by coming back at an ungodly hour— despite it already being just that. Being the gentleman that he is, Cedric insists on walking you back to the tent, stopping outside the entrance before wishing you a good night.

“I’m glad we finally got to have a proper conversation,” Cedric admits, a slight blush appearing on his cheeks to compliment his winning smile. “I’ve actually been wanting to talk to you for a while now.”

“Really?” A heat creeps its way onto your own cheeks as you avert your gaze from his bashfully.

“Yeah. You’re quiet, but the fastest chaser I’ve ever seen,” he chuckles, nervously running a hand through his hair. “And you’re certainly as kind and clever as Fred and George said you’d be.”

“So you’ve been asking about me?” You turn to him with a cheeky smile and an eyebrow raised as you arrive at the entrance of your tent. You’re not sure what it is, but you’ve taken a bit of confidence boost after getting to know him better.

“Uh, yeah,” he admits, biting back a bashful grin. You’re about to tease him a little, but then he does that thing where he averts his eyes to the ground and brings them back up to meet yours through his thick lashes and you’re left speechless.

It’s like you’ve completely forgotten how to use words and time slows down as he takes a step towards you and brings up a hand to tuck a loose strand to the side. His hand lingers on your jaw for a moment, and your heart rate starts to pick up. You think he might kiss you goodnight.

But then it starts: a riot. You jump back at the sound of breaking glass and you’re eyes go wide when you see flames rising in the horizon.

“Y/N—” His voice gets drowned out by your friends rushing out of the tent and you don’t get so much as a ‘goodbye’ as they pull you away to safety.

ii. the goblet

You’ve always been quite close to the golden trio, and they often come to you for help since you’re quite advanced in your magic and you know a lot about the castle. Kind of like a big sister to balance out the twins being mischievous older brothers. So when you bump into Harry after scene with his name emerging from the goblet of fire, your first instinct is to make sure you know his side of the story.

“I swear I didn’t put my name in—”

“It’s okay,” you reassure him, giving his shoulder a comforting squeeze. “I believe you.”

“At least someone does,” He thanks you and you pull him into a quick hug.

Squeezing his shoulders before letting go, you then run off to find the other Hogwarts champion.

“Cedric!” You call out to him as soon as you spot him patrolling the halls. “Cedric, wait up!”

He whips around at the sound of your voice, his mouth curling into a warm smile as you approach, which then turns to an expression of concern. “Hey- what are you doing out- it’s almost curfew—”

“He didn’t do it!” you blurt out through panted breaths, and he barely understands you.

“What—”

“Harry- h-he didn’t put his name in the goblet—”

“Y/N, relax,” he says in a calming voice, urging you to take the time you need to catch your breath.

“You have to believe me—”

“I do,” It warms his heart that you care so much about people and your passion is one of the many things that attracts him to you. “I believe you- and Harry, of course.”

“Oh, well- good,” You give him a smile as a way to finally greet him since you led with your rushed defence.

“Although I am a little disappointed that this is the first time I get to speak to you since the World Cup,” A corner of his mouth quirks up to form a lopsided smile that makes your heart rate spike.

“Y-Yeah- sorry about that,” you chuckle nervously, trying to smooth your now dishevelled uniform out.

“It’s all right, everything has been quite busy with the other schools coming in for the tournament,” He takes a step closer to you and you think you might melt from the smile he gives you.

“O-Oh, r-right, congratulations on being chosen, by the way, the goblet couldn’t have chosen a better champion—” It’s then that the close proximity starts to make you nervous, and the rambling kicks in, “O-other than Harry of course- not to say that Harry is a better champion, of course, you’re both a great- I’m talking too much, aren’t I?”

“I love hearing you talk,” His voice is smooth, and so are his hands when you register how they feel on yours as he takes them into his larger ones. The small gesture is enough to make you go quiet and you’re taken back to the night of the World Cup when he starts to lean down and it’s like the English language has disappeared from your mind.

“Oi! Get to your room before I deduct points!” Another voice calls out from the other end of the hall. Letting out a light sigh of frustration, Cedric turns around to greet the Ravenclaw prefect with a smile. “Oh, Cedric, I didn’t know it was you—”

“Yeah, sorry about that, mate, I was just, ehm, escorting this lovely Gryffindor,” Waving the other prefect off, he turns back to you. You want nothing more than for him to resume what he was about to do before, but the moment’s passed. “Let’s get you back to your common room then, shall we?”

With a nod you walk by his side wordlessly all the way back to the fat lady.

iii. the badges

You let out an exasperated sigh as you rip off yet another one of those idiotic badges off of an underclassman’s robe and throw it across the hall. You’ve lost count of how many you’ve seen, and have gotten progressively angry the more you see, resorting to ripping them off passing students like you just did.

In fact, upon seeing Draco Malfoy, the supplier of the horrible 'Support Cedric Diggory/Potter Stinks’ badges, you snatch the one he wears and throw at him, hitting him in the forehead.

“Hey! My father will—”

“Yes, we all know the nasty pureblood brat’s father will hear about every trivial injustice your ungrateful spoiled arse encounters,” you snarl as you grab him by the collar. He lets out a small yelp and he’s silenced for a moment as your gaze pierces through him. “Does Cedric Diggory know you’re demeaning a fellow student and Triwizard champion like this?”

Returning back to his usual unpleasantries, he swipes your hand away and brushes of his shirt. “I’d suppose so,” he snickers, arrogantly crossing his arms over his chest and turning his nose upwards. “Everyone’s wearing them, and I recall seeing his friends in particular wearing them out of support,” He then shifts his gaze and nods over your shoulder. You follow the direction to see Cedric himself laughing about something with his friends across the courtyard. “Y/N Y/L/N, is it? I’d reckon Cedric Diggory’s mudblood girlfriend would be supporting him as well.”

Whipping back around to shoot him another dirty look, you turn and start to stomp your way to Cedric, but not before taking another badge off of one of Malfoy’s friends and throwing it at him with your perfect quidditch aim.

“You’re a right foul git, Malfoy!” you shout, not bothering to look back to see the badge hit him square in the chest.

When Cedric notices you approaching, he gives you one of his dazzling smiles, but it falls at the sight of your scowl and the fire that burns behind your glare. He opts on trying to diffuse whatever it is with a warm greeting, “Hey, Y/N, how’s my favourite—”

“Cut the shit, Diggory,” you cut him off effectively, and he flinches at your use of his last name that obviously indicates that you aren’t in a good mood. His friends who bear witness to the scene that’s brewing stare at you wide-eyed and start to murmur words you don’t care to make out. “What the fu—”

“Excuse us,” He stands abruptly, and he starts lead you to a less populated area with a gentle grasp on your forearm. You do manage to rip the badge off of one of his laughing friends before he drags you away.

Steam flows out of your ears with every step you take, until you can’t stay quiet any longer. “Is this really the kind of competitor you are?” you question him, shaking off his grip. You look at him expectantly and he blinks a few times, still startled by your sudden hostility.

“Y/N, I don’t understand- is this about the—”

“Of course it’s about the bloody badges!” You let out an angry breath and your eyes wander all around, trying to focus on anything else so you can calm your nerves.

“I’ve told them not to wear them—” he tries to explain and you let out another huff, crossing your arms over your chest as though to let him know he ought to come up with a much better excuse than that. “Please, Y/N, I swear—”

“Well, the whole school is still wearing them regardless, so that’s not good enough for me.”

“Look, I’ve already spoken to Harry about it—”

“Then I suppose he’s already told you a secret that would help you out a great deal in the first task! And what have you done? You’ve simply 'told your friends’ not to wear those humiliating badges?!” Your patience is running short, and when his mouth opens without any words coming out, you spin on your heel and start to distance yourself from him.

But then he catches you by the elbow, halting you in your steps. “Yes, Harry has told me about the- the dragons,” he speaks in a hushed voice to make sure no one else hears, but also in hopes of it calming you a little. You won’t admit it now, because you’re still angry, but his voice does have a certain way of soothing you. “I am really grateful for that, and I have asked people not to wear them, but it’s out of my hands now—”

“I know, that Malfoy boy has a way of bringing Harry down every chance he gets,” you soften your tone once you see how genuinely bad Cedric feels.

“Never works though,” he smiles encouragingly. “Harry is strong.”

“Yeah, he is.”

“And he’s fortunate to have strong friends like you watching out for him,” Your crossed arms loosen as his thumb starts to rub slow circles where his hand still holds your elbow.

“Thanks,” you hum looking down as you once again realize exactly how close you’re standing.

His other hand comes up to hook a finger under your chin and pushes upwards gently so your eyes can meet his bright orbs.

Finally, a moment where you can let yourself become immersed in his entrancing eyes without any—

“Potter stinks!” Someone shouts loud enough to reach your ears. You break apart from him and locate the source, spotting a group of boys laughing as Harry walks by them.

And they’re Gryffindor— how fucking dare they?!

“Sorry, Ced, I’ll catch up with you later, I’ve got some nasty little gits who need to be taught a lesson.”

Although he is disappointed by yet another interruption, he can’t help but smile as he watches you storm off, leaving him to replay the way his nickname sounds coming your lips.

iv. the first task

“Cedric,” you call his name just above a whisper, hoping he can hear you. “Ced, are you there?” After a moment of silence, you consider walking away, thinking he must not be within hearing range and you wouldn’t want to disturb the other champions.

But then an arm reaches out and your pulled through the back of the tent by your bicep. You let out a yelp of surprise that becomes muffled by your face coming in contact with the fabric covering a muscular chest. It’s not hard for you to tell by the familiar scent of honey and sandalwood as well as the comforting arms that surround you, that Cedric did in fact hear you.

“I’m so happy to see you,” you murmur, circling your hand around his torso as you let yourself collapse into his hug. You’d be the biggest liar on the face of the Earth if you said you weren’t worried to death for him.

“Me too,” he pulls back slightly whilst still having you in his arms, and gives you a smile that reveals his perfect teeth.

“How are you doing- with the dragons and all?”

“I’m great,” His smile falters, telling you otherwise.

“Ced,” Your eyebrows knit together in concern.

“I-I’m- honestly, I’m scared,” he admits, his hands subconsciously clutching onto your shoulder.

“It’s okay to be scared,” you reassure him, bringing a hand up to caress the side of his face. He melts into your touch, letting his eyes flutter closed for a moment. “But you’re also brave, and I know you can pull this off.”

When his eyes open again, there’s a particular calmed sheen to them, along with something else you can’t quite put your finger on. You let your hand slide down to his chest where you can feel his heartbeat slow down with his steadying breaths. His eyes dart down to your lips, and then back up as though to ask permission, which you give by starting to lean in.

Just when you’re close enough to feel his breath fan over your lips, a blinding flash of light, accompanied with the distinct sound of an obnoxiously loud camera shutter goes off, and you both tear away from each other immediately. Your head whips around in every direction, and your speeding heart rate slows when you see that the camera wasn’t pointing at you, but Harry and Hermione instead.

“I-I should probably go now,” you stumble backwards, feeling your anxiety levels increase upon seeing Rita Skeeter once again poking her nose where it doesn’t belong.

“Uh- y-yeah—” he stutters out, a little shaken by the sudden intrusion.

Before you make your escape from the way you came in you lurch forward and wrap your arms around him tightly, whispering “good luck, Ced,” and ghost your lips hastily over his cheek.

You would have gone for a full kiss on the lips, but with all the previous failed attempts, and the prying journalist, you don’t want your first kiss with Cedric to be like this.

v. the ball

“Will you be attending the Yule Ball?” Cedric asks as coolly as he can muster as he strides up next to you.

You turn head to be met with the most adorably blushed cheeks, a lopsided grin, and an overall very good-looking Cedric as he walks next you with his hands shoved casually in his pockets.

“With how well I’ve been performing in the dance lessons, I think Professor McGonagall might hex me if I don’t,” you chuckle, slowing your pace down so you can speak to him properly.

“Well, if you don’t have a date yet, I was wondering if you’d like to go with me?”

“Oh, Ced, I-I’m so sorry,” Sympathy takes over your features as you apologize. “I-It’s just that George already asked me and he was mighty desperate,” you laugh, thinking about your best friend practically begging you so that he didn’t end up going alone. At least it was better than Fred who threw a paper ball at Angelina.

“Oh, that’s okay,” His eyes shift downwards and he definitely doesn’t sound like he’s okay.

“I’m really sorry, Ced,” You reach forward to give his arm gentle squeeze. He tilts his head back up to look into your eyes and perk up as a thought comes to mind, “Maybe I could make it up to you?”

He tries his best to bite back a smile at the suggestion, catching his bottom lip between his perfect teeth. And then, as if he were trying to make up for all the other missed opportunities, he steps forward and cups the side of your face as quickly as your playful grin appears and—

“Oi, Cedric Diggory!” A voice interrupts your moment for the umpteenth time. You almost roll your eyes at how all too familiar this scenario has become. Breaking away from Cedric you see an easily recognizable head of red hair approaching. “Trying to steal my date, are ya?” George waltzes in, casually slinging an arm around your shoulders. Crossing your arms casually, you look between a rosy-cheeked Cedric and your smirking best friend. “S'all right ya know— we’re not dating, but I’ve got this cheeky one under reserve for the ball,” He pinches your cheek as speaks, like the goofball he is.

“Yeah, and I accepted out of pity,” you tease him, letting loose a chortle as he pretends to be hurt.

“Speaking of which, we’ve got a lot of practicing to do,” he says, ushering you away and completely oblivious to your situation.

You look back to see Cedric rubbing the back of his neck out of light frustration and you mouth an “I’m sorry,” to him as George whisks you away.

+i. the lake

You wake with a jolt, sputtering water out of your lungs, and desperately trying to view your surrounding through blurred vision. The first thing you can register is the undeniable anxiety spreading through your chest. The second is being enveloped in warmth and your erratic heart rate starting to slow to the tune of a soothing voice whispering in your ear.

It’s all very hectic and you’re overwhelmed with panic and external stimuli as you continue to cough whilst attempting to stabilize your eyesight.

Finally being somewhat calibrated in your senses, you start to take in your environment; the hard wood beneath you, the deafening cheers of the crowd, the Black Lake surrounding you, and Cedric Diggory holding you close to him. He doesn’t seem to care one bit that you’re essentially throwing up water all over his shoulder.

After processing all this, a gust of wind blows through, rippling the water, and it sends an unforgiving shiver up your spine. Cedric feels this and tightens his arms around you, and you, in return, cling to him like a life line— which you’re assuming he just has been, judging by the champion uniform he wears and the fact that he’s also soaking wet.

Were you trapped in the lake?

“Yes,” he answers, speaking softly as to not worsen the immense panic you must be feeling. You hadn’t even realized you spoke those words aloud through your chattering teeth. “But it’s okay- you’re okay, you’re safe now,” he continues to whisper soothing words to you as you try to breathe normally again. “I’ve got you.”

He pulls back with his arms still circled around you, checking you over for any injuries. You take him in; wet hair flopping every which way, cheeks and nose tinted a bright pink, and the smile of relief when he sees that you show no signs of being seriously hurt. Greeting him with a smile of your own, you let it reach your eyes as you pull him back to you, nearly knocking the both of you off the pier.

You’re perfectly content ignoring anyone else who tries to help as you bask in his warmth, but then another thought occurs to you, “Where’s Harry?”

Cedric opens his mouth to answer, and then on cue, Harry comes flying out of the water and lands hard on the deck.

“Harry!” You cry out, rushing over to him as someone else wraps a towel around his shivering form.

“Y-Y/N! I-I tried t-to save you too b-but Cedric—”

“It’s all right, Harry, I’m okay,” you reassure him with a small smile. “And I’m glad to see you are too.”

The crowd cheers upon seeing all of the champions and saved hostages. Cedric steps forward, clapping a congratulatory hand on Harry’s shoulder before curling an arm around you. As you lean into him, he takes it upon himself to loop his other arm around you and pull your body flush to his, sending a heat that travels through your veins as he does so.

“You know, the mermaids said they took something each of us would sorely miss,” he tells you, holding your face in his hands delicately as though you could break if he doesn’t handle you with enough care. “Well, th-they did, a-and I don’t know what I would’ve done if I weren’t able to find you in time,” His eyes hold nothing but concern and the pain felt at the prospect of losing you.

“Ced,” you say his name breathlessly, all other words becoming foreign to you, yet again.

He leans his forehead onto yours and lets his eyelids flutter closed as your uneven breaths eventually sync up. His hands feel warm on your face, and his lips are so close to yours. That’s when he decides that he’s not letting anything get in the way this time.

The cheers only grow in volume when Cedric closes the gap and presses his lips to yours. Not knowing what else to do with your hands, they grab onto the first part of him they can find, which happens to be his jersey. Your fingers curl into the wet fabric that’s stuck to his abdomen as you kiss him back like your life depends on it.

The crowd’s noises fade away as you both become engrossed in the taste of each other. The wind chill and the gross lake water soon become after thoughts. This moment has been put off for far too long, in both your opinions, and there’s a lot of lost time to make up for.

[hispeculiartreasure]

All We’ve Got is Time - Chapter Six | B.B.

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Female Reader

AU: If They’d Survived/Post-War/Window Washer!Bucky Barnes

Rating: All Audiences

Word count: 2,901

Chapter 6/24

Warnings: Can second-hand embarrassment be a warning???

AN: This chapter was one of the first scenes I thought up when this idea was born. It was so much fun to write.

As a heads up, I won’t be posting a new chapter next week. I am going to be insanely busy -  as in, leaving the house at 6AM and running around like crazy until 11PM kind of week. Between my grandpa slowly deteriorating and my niece being born within the next 10 days, I’ve got too much going on to give posting the care and attention I want to. Chapter 7 will be posted on June 6. Thanks for sticking with me 💕

Chapter Five

‘All We’ve Got is Time’ Masterlist

The below adorable image was found in this super interesting article!

“Well hey there you smitten kitten,” the sweet, curly-haired Dorothy purrs.

You scrunch your nose at the name, moving to take a seat at a table in the breakroom. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

“You know exactly what it means.”

“Now tell us Suzy is full of it and you haven’t seen this boy five times since Saturday,” Connie scoffs before sipping her glass-bottled Coca Cola.

Your unamused gaze turns to Suzy who says, “Sorry!” in a very not-sorry voice. “You’ve been coy all week about it, we are equally invested in this relationship. They deserve to know.”

“Excuse me, you’ve been on how many dates in the last week with this boy?” Charity squawks, taking her lunch out of the fridge.

“It’s actually been less than a week.”

“Suzy, how is that helpful?” you say through an exasperated sigh.

“Five out of the last six nights is what you said, right? Sounds pretty serious.”

“To quote her roommate: ‘He must be something special since this is the most she’s been out of the apartment since move-in day’.” You were going to kill Suzy.

You grind out, “I’m not introducing you to any of my other friends if you’re going to use them against me.”

“If I remember correctly, you claimed you didn’t have any other-” The ringing of a telephone interrupts her. “Damn it, that’s mine.” She scoots out of the kitchen and you can hear her pick up the receiver. You zone out of the other womens’ discussion for a moment to hear Suzy say, “Who is this? Oh, hiiiii. How did you- Uh-huh.”

Tall, dark, and gorgeous Frances brings you back to the topic at hand. “Newbie, you need to give us the scuttlebutt.”

“Uh, I mean. . . I’ve been having a really nice time with him.”

“Get out of here with that dodginess. Come on, give us poor single girls something to hang onto.”

“Honestly, we’ve just been getting to know each other. We’ve had good conversations over dinner, walked around the park, perused some art galleries. It’s. . . been lovely. He’s a sweetheart.”

A chorus of “awwww!”s fills the room.

“You know we’re going to ask you a million questions, may as well give us as many details as you can now.”

Resigned to your fate you lean back in your chair, mentally searching for harmless information. “Umm. . . he’s from Brooklyn. He served with the army, was in Europe for the last few years. Has sisters, both parents still alive. Was a good student and an athlete. From how much he talks about his friends, he’s extremely loyal. But that’s really all I’ve got.”

“Sounds like a real dreamboat.”

“Did he give ya a smooch yet?” Connie asks around a mouthful of sandwich.

“Connie.” You know your flat tone won’t do a thing to discourage her.

“That’s a no.” She continues in a sing-song voice, “Which means it’s co-ming!”

“He hasn’t been affectionate at all?” Alice, the tiny shy one pipes up.

“He kissed my hand after our first date and I’ve gotten a few pecks on the cheek when he drops me back home. Usually when we walk and cross streets he holds my hand, or at least offers his arm.”

“A gentleman. That must be nice,” Millie, the baby of the bunch at 19, snorts.

“Do you not want to kiss him?” Connie, ever the one to get straight down to business.

You look down, can feel your heart beating fast. “I-I, uh. I. . . of course I want to kiss him.”

“Then what’s the problem?”

“There’s not a problem. You’ve all seen him, you know he’s handsome. The moment just hasn’t arrived yet. I don’t want to force it and get nervous or weird.”

“You’re making me blush, Sixth Floor,” a smooth, deep voice brings the lunch-time chatter to a halt.

You turn so fast in your chair you think you may have given yourself whiplash.

The subject of your conversation is in the threshold of the breakroom, one shoulder propped against the door jam, hands full of a stunning bouquet of your favorite flowers. Suzy peers over his shoulder, ruby-red lips curled in a satisfied smirk.

You leap to your feet, smoothing down your skirt and patting your hair. “Buc-Hi!,” you say, your tone slightly shrill with embarrassment. “W-what are you doing here?!” Your face drops, thinking back to Flannery’s two warnings about male visitors in the office. “You’re not supposed to be here,” you whisper-shout - as if the office manager would pop out from behind the sofa and catch you.

“Relax, Newbie. Flannery’s out at that executives lunch, remember?” Suzy steps even with Bucky, sharing a mischievous glance. “He wanted to surprise you so he enlisted the sneakiest dame to smuggle him in.”

“And I’ll forever be in your debt, ma’am,” Bucky banters, a cheeky grin in place.

Suzy eyes him up and down, then turns to look at you. “I like this one.” The room of women collapses into giggles at her brazenness.

“Watch yourself, Suze,” you playfully warn as you approach Bucky.

“For you, ma’am,” he offers the bouquet.

Breathing in the blooms you whisper, “You remembered.”

“‘Course I did,” he whispers back. “I called Suzy from the drug store across the street to see if the coast was clear. I wouldn’t just barge in with Mrs. Flannery on duty, I promise.”

“Well, are you going to introduce us to this delightful fella or not?” Dorothy titters.

You turn back to the room, flowers in one hand while the other sneaks into the crook of Bucky’s elbow. “Apparently you’ve met Suzy. But here we’ve got Charity, Frances, Alice, Millie, Dorothy, and Connie.” Each girl greets him in their own way, some smiling, some waving. Connie just stares at him.

“Ladies, this is Bucky.”

Connie lets out a small gasp. “Wait. Bucky Barnes?”

“Uh. . . yeah?” You’re slightly unnerved. Do they know each other?

“The Bucky Barnes?! Of the Howling Commandos?!” She’s on her feet, eyes wide.

You can feel Bucky stiffen beneath your hand before he shuffles his feet.

“Yes ma’am,” he replies lowly, directing his gaze to a fixed point on the floor.

Connie practically shrieks while several other girls’ eyebrows are raised, obviously affected by her words.

“Ohmygoshohmygoshohmygoshohmygosh-“

“Connie, what are you going on about?” A wave of protectiveness washes over you, hand tightening on his arm.

“You have been going on dates with Bucky freakin’ Barnes and you haven’t known?!”

“Known what?”

“The Howling Commandos! Captain America!” She gestures wildly at your indifference. “Have you been living under a rock the last few years?”

“No, I’ve been living in a factory the last few years. We didn’t exactly sit around discussing the paper,” you can’t help the bite to your words, not enjoying her tone or Bucky’s unease.

He clears his throat. “My last few years of service, I was in a special operations unit.”

“With Captain America!” Connie exclaims, practically jumping up and down. “He’s, like, his childhood best friend!”

The girls go into a frenzy, talking over each other to ask questions or give compliments. Unsurprisingly, Connie’s voice silences everyone else’s.

“So. Is he single? Because he’s so cute, I really think we’d get along - I’m very patriotic and I-“

“I’m sorry, ma’am. He’s, uh- spoken for.”

“It’s the girl from the compass, isn’t it? I thought that’d be over by now. What if-“

Bucky interrupts her prattling. “Trust me - Connie, right? - that’s a bear you don’t wanna poke. It’s solid.”

“Oh.”

You had never seen Constance Adler deflate, but you’re pretty sure that’s what was happening now. She almost looks like a kicked puppy and normally you’d feel bad for her - if she hadn’t dropped a metaphorical bombshell on you.

“Bucky,” Suzy steps in, laying a hand on your shoulder, “We appreciate all you’ve done the last few years. Newbie, why don’t you show him your desk and find a vase for those flowers, yeah?”

You nod and tug Bucky out of the break room. Several steps down the hall you hear Suzy speaking in a hushed, stern tone she usually reserved for belligerent businessmen. Minutes ago, you wanted to strangle her for prodding you. But she was respectful of boundaries and definitely felt that one had been crossed. Now all you wanted was to wrap her in a hug of gratitude.

Your brain finally catches up to the new information you’ve just been given. Suddenly, Bucky made a lot more sense to you. Special operations meant specially horrible circumstances. Knowing now that he’d seen combat as well brought his struggles into sharp relief for you. And he had to handle everything in more of a public light than the average soldier.

“I’m sorry about that, Bucky. Connie can be . . . a lot.”

He shakes his head, rolls his shoulders. “Aw, it’s nothing. I’ve met worse.” His smile doesn’t quite reach his eyes and your heart stings for him. “I was going to tell you soon, I swear. That’s not how I wanted you to find out.”

“You don’t owe me a thing. We can talk about it later.” You reach your desk and empty a glass that held your pens and pencils, swapping them out for the flowers. “These really are gorgeous. You didn’t have to do this.”

He nods, shoving his hand into his pockets. “I know. But I wanted to. Hoped they’d brighten your desk.”

“Thank you, Bucky. This was. . . incredibly sweet of you,” you murmur, even though you’re the only two in the bullpen.

Finally, his smile seems genuine. “You’re welcome.” He takes a moment to survey the office, coming to perch against your desk. “I’ve gotta admit, it’s strange being on this side of the glass.”

“It’s strange having you on this side of the glass. Not that I mind,” you add quickly, terrified of saying the wrong thing. A beat passes, Bucky staring at the floor, you staring at the flowers.

With the barest hint of amusement Bucky finally speaks up. “So, you think I’m handsome, huh?”

Bringing your hands to cover your eyes you let out a groan, prompting a manly chuckle. “God, that’s embarrassing.”

“Nah, I’m flattered really. It’s not every day a fella like me hears that from the prettiest girl in the room.”

“Okay, calm down, sweet talker,” you playfully nudge an elbow into his shoulder. “Ya know. . . you could’ve at least told me your best friend was Captain America,” you tease.

He tosses his head back in mock disgust, jarring a strand of hair loose. “To be fair, I did mention him on our first date. Several times, in fact.”

“Because I was definitely supposed to make the connection between your scrawny friend who was gravely ill his entire life and America’s Hope.”

“I’m disappointed, frankly. Seems like a pretty easy jump to me, ma’am.”

“How could I ever make it up to you, sir?”

“There is something I had in mind. . .” He leans in close. “Dinner tomorrow night?”

“I’m gonna have to check my calendar, Barnes,” you sigh, nose inches away from his. Those blue eyes search your own before they flit to your lips for a split second.

The moment is ruined when Suzy barrels into the room.

“Red alert, red alert! Flannery’s coming!”

“WHAT!” You shout, jumping away from Bucky. “She’s not supposed to be back for another 20 minutes!”

“Well evidently she didn’t enjoy herself because I saw her out the window of the breakroom. If Flannery finds out he’s here, she’s gonna bust your chops.”

The sound of grinding gears from the elevator shaft drives the point home. You look between Suzy and Bucky, frozen in your spot, mouth agape.

“I’m sorry, this was a bad idea-” Bucky starts.

“No time, hide! GIRLS OUT HERE!” Suzy immediately takes control. A stampede arrives from the breakroom in response to Suzy’s urgent tone. “Flannery is on her way up. We need to get him out of this office without her seeing him. Run interference, hide him behind you, I don’t care - under no circumstances can he be caught, capiche?”

A chorus of ‘capiche’ answers her.

“You,” she points in your direction, “stay at your desk so she doesn’t suspect you.”

Ding.

The elevator doors sweep open before anyone can elaborate on the plan. Out the corner of your eye you see Bucky vault over your desk to remain unseen. Instantaneously a few typists congregate around you, the rest act as subtle “checkpoints” in a trail toward the stairs.

Suzy approaches Flannery, who stands ominously at the front of the office, suspicion wrinkling her forehead. “Flanny, you’re back!”

“Susan-”

“Aw, you know I hate my full name. How many times do I have to tell you to call me Suzy?” Your friend stands directly in front of her, blocking the view to your desk.

You lean down, catching Bucky’s eye. “I’m sorry,” you whisper. “See you tomorrow?”

“Tomorrow, doll,” he winks up at you, then turns to crouch-crawl to the next desk.

“I assume as many times as I have to tell you never to call me ‘Flanny’,” you hear the office manager practically growl.

“Of course, yes ma’am. Lunch go good?” Alice and Dorothy converge to talk over a file to cover Bucky’s journey to the next desk.

“Lunch went well, yes.”

Dorothy waves Frances over, evidently needing her opinion on the wording of a letter. Sheltered behind their skirts they walk Bucky to Millie’s desk which happens to sit adjacent to an enormous filing cabinet. Your window washer ducks behind it, allowing the typists to shift around - doing their best to avoid moving like a herd.

“So why the rush back?” Suzy follows Flannery to the front desk, watching Bucky’s progress surreptitiously.

“I can only handle so much male arrogance in one sitting.”

“Oh, I hear that. Say, I think that mold may be back in the breakroom, I swear I saw a spot of something.” Suzy raises her voice, “Wanna come with me to check it out?”

Flannery sighs deeply, tucking her handbag into a desk drawer. “I suppose.”

This was it. Suzy continues jabbering at Flannery, walking side by side with her. She jerks her head toward the stairwell door and Frances whispers to Bucky, “Go, go, go!”

He’s on his feet but still bent at the waist, booking it to the door.

“Wait,” Flannery turns on her heel back toward the front. Everyone sucks a breath in, thinking Bucky’s been sighted. At the syllable he had dropped to his knees and slid across the floor - landing with his back flat against the front side of Flannery’s desk. Eyes wide, you watch Flannery stride to the desk, reaching beneath it to pull out a glass bottle. “The janitors gave me a chemical mixture they used on it last time.” She was mere inches from Bucky - if she had the super-sonar hearing everyone accused her of she would definitely have heard his heart beating out of his chest.

With the bottle in hand she takes a few steps back into the bullpen before taking stock of everyone’s tension. “What’s going on?” she asks. On his tiptoes Bucky creeps to the stairwell door. Just a few more steps and we’re home-free, you try to calm yourself. Flannery makes to turn back to the front; at that point everyone was certain your job was done-for. At the last moment Connie lets out a deafening screech.

All eyes are on her, including Flannery. Then she screams, “RAT!” Every typist in the room follows suit, insisting they saw it too, hopping up on their chairs or desks.

Bucky reaches the stairwell and with one more wink in your direction, he disappears.

You breathe a deep sigh of relief from your seat atop your desk. You turn to Connie and mouth “Thank you”. She nods in return and says silently, “Sorry”.

“Ladies, ladies! Calm down! It’s just an animal!” Your office manager is absolutely fed up with this day, with these women, with this job. Quiet descends on the bullpen. “What has gotten you all ridiculously hysterical today?” The stairwell door clicks shut, causing Flannery to spin in its direction. She scans the face of every person, looking for someone to break. Much to your satisfaction, everyone is stoic.

It’s in this moment that you find yourself genuinely glad to be in this office with these women. Every one stepped up to save your job, your livelihood. And everyone was excited about this new relationship once they saw how happy you’d been. If your adrenaline hadn’t been pumping wildly you might have had to hold back tears.

But then Flannery is walking up to your desk. She gestures to the flowers Bucky had brought you. “And where did these come from?”

Suzy swoops in. “Her mother called in to have them delivered, isn’t that precious of her?”

“Is today a special occasion?”

“No ma’am, just because,” you shrug, stroking a few petals.

Flannery hums in a tone that says she isn’t entirely convinced. “Alright Susan. Show me where you saw the mold.”

“Right this way, Flanny.”

The pair disappears into the breakroom and every typist slumps and groans.

“That’s all the excitement I need for the next week,” Alice pants, hand to her chest.

Charity throws a smirk in your direction. “Newbie, that boy is trouble in the best kind of way.”

“You’re not wrong, Charity.” You turn to the flower arrangement again. “You’re not wrong.”

Chapter Seven

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[shawnsorangeglasses]

The Opposition - Part 2

4.4k words

gif found on @shawn-mendes-pictures 

it’s part two and i’m shaking. I think this is a goodun.

Synopsis: Shawn is a tightly wound, Type A law student in college. For the most part, he has his life figured out and planned to the minute. Then comes Caroline, a charming Type B and his unlikely equal.

warnings: brief mention of death and sex but not necessarily in that order and not at all in detail

…

Mornings start early for Shawn. Only the finches and sparrows chirp and sing songs at this hour. No one else in the building is awake, so he can go downstairs to the common room. It's the best time to get the good coffee with little to no human interaction. Zero noise and no one to see him in his onesie.

He sits in a lounge chair, watching the sun come up over the tree line outside. The whole room gradually transitions from gray to a soft orange. The quiet is both comforting and unnatural for the busy dormitory. It’s times like this Shawn wishes he could bottle feelings to calm himself down later.

An hour later, he walks back to his hall, making sure to wave good morning to the security guard lady at the front desk.

“Shawn?”

He turns towards the direction his name came from. Kate is there, coming through the door behind another student swiping themselves in. She looks great, as usual, and it stirs something inside of him. He hates that she can still affect him this way. What’s worse is she knows it.

The dynamic is different now though since Shawn broke it off with her last summer. Now, he knows better. He’s noticed how she moves and talks when she wants something out of him. Whether she’s doing it on purpose is still something of a mystery. Sometimes it works, but not as much anymore. Even now, he wonders if his heart skips a beat because he’s still hung up or because this is technically a security breach.

“Kate,” he says, paralyzed. “What are you doing? You don’t live here.”

She continues to approach him. “Harrison didn’t tell you I’ve been trying to get a hold of you?”

Shawn swallows hard, “He told me. You should probably stop texting him, he can’t afford the data.”

“I wouldn’t have to text him if you just gave me your new number.”

Shawn bites his tongue. He wants to say he can’t afford the data charges either, but that might set her off. So he says nothing.

She shifts from one foot to the other. “How have you been?”

“Better,” he admits. He looks down at his onesie. “I’d rather not have this conversation right now, Kate.”

“Shawn, I’m trying to apologize-”

“Don’t,” he cuts her off. “You have nothing to be sorry for. We have nothing in common and I fucked up thinking we did.”

“I just wanted to make sure you were okay. That we’re okay.”

“I’m fine,” he shrugs. “I’m already over it.”

“Well maybe we can go get breakfast or something? Just you and me?”

She smiles and Shawn can feel himself softening. It easy to say whatever when she's not in front of him. Getting trapped in her icy blue eyes this time serves as a reminder that he’s without a doubt still in love. And it only makes this harder. He looks down into his mug. “I’ve already made plans with Harrison.”

Her face falls slightly. “You can’t squeeze me into your tight schedule?”

Shawn tightens his fist behind his back. "You know me. A plan is plan."

"You used to always make exceptions for me."

"Yeah well," his voice carries a little too far. Reel it back in. "That was then. We're not together anymore. If we ever were together at all."

"Don't make this sound like I didn't care about you," she shoots back.

"I don't know Kate, did you? I dropped everything for you and you never tried to be more than-," his words trailed off. That's not something to be said out loud. In front of the security guard lady.

"I know I wasn't the best to you, but I know what I want now. And I want us to try again. Can't we?"

"Don't you think that everything ends for reason, Kate?"

Kate glowers at him the way she used to when she didn’t get her way. Shawn holds eye contact, refusing to let her bend him. He takes a sip of his coffee when she finally breaks.

“Fine,” she groans. “Guess I’ll see you later.”

Hopefully not, he thinks to himself. “I’ve gotta go wake Harry up.”

Shawn doesn’t wait for her rebuttal. That last thing he wants is to be the guy caught arguing with his fling on the first floor. He lets go of a breath of air he didn’t realize he was holding in as he boards the elevator. His eyes sting and blur, making it difficult to find the right button.

...

Classes start Monday. The local news said this would be the last week of high temperatures, so Shawn made plans to go with Harrison to the mall and buy some colder weather clothing. He did try to protest waking up early on a Saturday to go shopping for coats in August, but Shawn managed to convince him by promising ice cream later. Harrison is easy to win over that way.

"Harry," he called from the other side of their dorm. "You better be ready or I'm leaving your ass here. And don't think I'll bring you something back. I will not."

“Why can’t we just order the shit online,” Harrison shouts back.

“Because we don’t want to turn into hermits.”

Shawn adjusts some out of place items on his desk before exiting his room. The dandelions he and Caroline picked yesterday are still kind of alive on top of his leather journal. The way the sunlight is coming into his room right now makes them look exceptionally yellow. He stores them in between a couple of pages and flattens the book with a dictionary. Something he saw in a movie once.

Harrison hops on one foot out of his room, tugging his sneaker onto the other foot. His t-shirt hangs around his neck. "I can't find my glasses."

Shawn stands by the front door, swinging his keys around his finger. He blinks slowly at his disoriented friend. "They're on your nose."

Harrison pats the side of his head, feeling the wire rim framing his face. "Oh. Duh." He pulls the rest of his shirt down. "Okay I'm ready."

"Alright, come on then."

Shawn double checks his pockets as they walk out. The door automatically locks behind them and they walked to the elevators.

"Wait," Harrison shouts.

Shawn nearly jumped out of his skin. "What now? You’ll wake the whole floor yelling like that."

"We gotta get Caroline."

Shawn rubs the bridge of his nose. "I didn't plan for Caroline. I planned for us."

"Oh, you with the fucking plans. She's our friend. We have to get her."

"Fine! Fine, her room is on the second floor." Shawn pushes the elevator call button. The doors open immediately. "Christ, if I didn't know any better, I'd think you were into her."

"And yet I'm not the one who knows where her dorm room is," Harrison says coolly.

Shawn shoots him a look. "Fuck off. It's not even like that."

He throws his hands up in surrender. "All I'm saying is it's really cute that you walked her back here. I just knew you would."

“Any good person would walk a woman home. It’s called being a gentleman.”

“Yeah yeah, call it what you want. I see this coming a mile away. Can’t say I blame you. She’s got that X factor. That je ne sais quoi. That secret sauce.”

“I’m gonna stop you at ‘secret sauce.’”

The skin on Shawn's face slowly turns red as he remembers the dandelions as well as the feeling of Caroline tucking them into his hair. He hasn't let anyone get that physically close since Kate. A funny, warm sensation spreads throughout his chest. He swallows it.

“Oh is that some blush I see,” Harrison teases.

"We're almost to her room, shut the fuck up."

Thankfully, Caroline’s room was one of the furthest from the elevators. It gave Shawn a minute to cool himself down. He leans on the doorframe and knocks twice. “Behave,” he warns Harrison.

He blows a raspberry. “What’s the fun in that?”

The door swings open. A tall, lanky, blonde girl stands there in an oversized shirt, brushing her teeth. “Who uh yahl,” she asks through minty foam.

“Uh, friends of Caroline,” Shawn manages to say.

“Hahng ahn,” she says, slamming the door shut. When it opens again, Caroline is in her place, excited and bright in the eyes. She’s an early bird too.

“Boys, to what do I owe this pleasure?”

“Shawn’s making me go outside,” Harrison whines. “So I need you to come for emotional support.”

Shawn rolls his eyes and they settle on Caroline. “How soon can you get ready?”

She turns and shouts, “Beth! I’m leaving!” Presumably Beth responds with a gargled “okay.” Caroline turns back to Shawn and Harrison, “Give me three minutes.”

…

The mall is as packed as one should expect it to be on the weekend at the end of summer. Shawn can hardly enjoy himself. Caroline and Harrison are cracking jokes left and right, but he stays a few steps behind, going round and round in his own head about Kate. She seemed so sincere and honest. And out of all the problems they had, she never lied to him about anything.

“Shawn,” Harrison says.

Shawn falls out of his thoughts. “Huh?”

“Where’d you go, man? I said your name like three times.”

Shawn looks between his friends' confused expressions. “S-Sorry, I was um...just thinking.”

“Okay. Well I never got to pee at the dorm so I’m going to the bathroom. Caroline’s in charge.”

Shawn looks at Caroline, who’s already shaking her head. She mouths “no I’m not” and sits down on a concrete bench. Shawn sits next to her, keeping a safe and polite distance from her hip. She seems to take this as a cue to turn to her phone.

"Sorry to drag you down here," Shawn says. "Unexpectedly."

"It's fine. I wasn't busy and I like hanging with you two."

Shawn takes a second to really look at Caroline out the corner of his eye. Enigmatic Caroline. She dressed comfortable today, like the first time he met her. She also isn't aware of him watching, as she's far too engrossed in an article on her phone. He can feel the muscles in his back starting to unravel the longer he watches her in her own little world.

"So," she starts to say, not once looking up, "any reason as to why we're at the mall this fine Saturday morning?"

"Harry needs winter clothes and if I didn't make him go today he would still be wearing tank tops in November."

Caroline doesn't say anything for a beat. Then her hand is on his sleeve. "Are you sure you’re okay? Did that stick up your ass grow branches or something?"

She says it in such a loving tone, Shawn has to laugh at the irony. "I'll be fine. We can all talk about it later."

"Well," she reclines back, surveying Shawn, "before I forget, you do look nice today."

"I thought I dressed like the dean," says Shawn.

"Oh you do, but it's not as stuffy as yesterday. This looks like you might be Harrison's and my cool dad. I'd probably roll the sleeves up though."

Shawn looks down at his cuffs. He lends an arm to Caroline. She unbuttons his right wrist and neatly rolls the fabric up to just before the bend of his elbow, then does the same to the left. Shawn squirms in his seat, unsure of how to react to her skin touching his. It really has been a while. She bites her lip, looking him over one more time. Her inky eyes dart around until they settle on his collar. “May I,” she asks.

Shawn’s eyebrows furrow. “Is all this really necessary?”

“Yes,” she unfastens the top most button, “because if I had this body, I’d be unstoppable, okay?”

Her words all but force him to compare. Caroline is by no means a model, but there’s clearly physical appeal to her body. She dresses comfortable, but just like the red dress from yesterday, she also dresses to accentuate. Much like now, she had on an oversized cardigan and a romper that did not match in anyway but still looked good on her. Every line is bold and intentional without being so obvious.

"One more thing," she says, and pushes a curl back into his hair. "What’s with you always hiding this pretty face?"

To say he doesn’t like the compliments would be untrue, but Shawn couldn’t ignore the twisty feeling in his stomach. It doesn't feel normal. None of it makes sense coming from Caroline, as if she’s speaking another language or telling him some kind of dirty secret. It puts him a compromising position between indulgence and denial. Twice each she complimented him and Harrison on the way to the mall. Harrison, of course, took it easier because he’s Harrison. Shawn nearly ran into a couple of curbs and parked crookedly.

Caroline scoots back on the bench to observe her edits. “There, now doesn’t that feel a little better?”

It does, but he isn't about to admit it outright. Shawn clears his throat. "Whatever. Quit embarrassing me."

She shakes her head. “I can’t help but feel like you’d be better adjusted if you just got laid,” she says a little too loud. A couple of younger girls walking by snicker in a huddle.

“I get l-laid enough, t-thank you very much,” Shawn stammers.

“Really? When’s the last time you got some?”

“I’m not answering that.”

A few people glance their way, either annoyed or entertained. Shawn drops his head in his hands. "You're insufferable."

“And you’re uptight.”

Harry comes out of the bathroom a few minutes later, shaking his head. "I swear people get filthier and filthier," he spits. "Toilet paper and puddles everywhere. Let’s buy these sweaters so we can go get ice cream already."

“You don’t want to at least get some real food before that,” Shawn suggests.

“It’s all going to the same place anyways,” Harrison and Caroline say at the same time. They both smile at each other.

“Wow,” Shawn scoffs. “Literal children. Both of you.”

…

They started at The North Face, but Harrison winced at too many of the price tags, so they downgraded to Banana Republic. He found some online coupons on his phone and that got him into the shopping mood. For a while, he was dragging Caroline and Shawn from store to store. Harrison had about $200 worth of clothes by the time he decided he couldn’t handle spending much else.

Now settled in the food court, Shawn sets up his own office space at the end of the table, complete with laptop and notebook. He bought Chinese for himself and Harrison while Caroline got a meatball sub. “I’ll eat in a second,” he promises when Harrison asks him to take a break. He scribbled some notes about possible laws that can be applied to an ethics court case from 1983, Bouvia v. Superior Court.

"Bro, when is that even due," Harrison asks, mouth full of orange chicken. He's curled up in the corner of the booth they chose.

"Uh," Shawn checks his syllabus, "next Friday."

Harrison leans across the table and slams his laptop shut. He points a menacing spork at him, to which Shawn folds his arms in front of his chest. "Shawn Peter Raul Mendes, stop and get something to eat."

Shawn takes a hasty bite of the eggroll from the container in front of him and retreats back into his papers. “I’ll eat in a minute.”

"Hey, this is a good time to talk about that thing," Caroline pipes up. "Remember that thing that was bothering you?"

The tip of Shawn's pencil snaps. He sighs as Kate wanders back into his headspace. Caroline worries that she may have overstepped when he doesn’t speak for a second or two. Then his gentle nod assures her that she did not.

"What thing," Harrison asks warily.

"Kate," Shawn pushes his hair out of his face, eventually resting on his hand. "She caught me downstairs this morning. Before I came to wake you up."

"Ah shit," Harrison winces.

"Nothing bad happened. She just wanted to get back together."

Harrison's eyes widen. "And you said no, right?"

"Obviously." Shawn tucks his hands between his legs. His foot taps uncontrollably under the table. "But…"

"Not the but," Harrison tugs at his hair. "But? Really?!"

Shawn doesn't say a word. He feels like a child again, wanting something he shouldn't have. Kate isn’t a bad person, but he decided a long time ago that they weren’t good for each other. She wants freedom. He wants stability. Shawn was always so sure of every decision he made in the past, but love is different. There’s never a way to plan for it.

"I don't know. Maybe I ended things too quickly."

"If you don't mind me asking, why not just see if she's ready to move on," Caroline asks. "Like find someone new?"

"You haven't met Kate," Harrison mutters through his hands. "She wants Shawn. Why? I don't know. He's a pain in my ass."

"Ditto," Shawn deadpans.

“She may be fucking gorgeous, but she’s incapable of committing. One minute she’s into lawyers. The next, she wants an art hoe. It makes me dizzy.”

“Well there’s a frat party on Friday,” Caroline offers. “I was invited and they let you bring a plus one. I’m almost certain she’ll be there.”

Shawn and Harrison’s eyes meet and they laugh right in each other's faces. “That’s a good one Caroline,” Harrison says, wiping a tear, “I almost threw up when you said frat.”

“What is so funny,” she shrugs.

“Like any of those frats would want us at their party,” Shawn says. “A snitch and a bisexual in the middle of all that? It’s a recipe for disaster.”

“Come on, Shawn and I can go, there’ll be a bunch of other hot guys, and we can see if she’s serious about him this time around.”

Shawn considers the idea. The thought of being surrounded by a bunch of drunk undergraduates nauseates him to say the least. He'd rather write twenty court case papers. However, it is a social setting filled with every single one of Kate’s types. A party is the ideal place to see if she means what she says. And no matter what his mind told him about

Harrison shakes his head. "Caroline it's a great idea in theory, but Shawn's never gonna-"

"Let's do it," Shawn blurts.

Harrison and Caroline stop themselves short. "What," they ask.

"It's insane and I hate parties, but I'll get my answer. We have a whole week to prepare. I don’t see why not, other than a few thousand ways this could go wrong. But I want to."

And there are a few thousand ways this could go wrong. Too many drinks. Too many drunk girls. Drunk angry frat guys. Drunk angry frat guys looking to start a fight with Shawn. The cops could show up. Fraternity parties are always a shit show waiting

Caroline’s arms shoot up straight in the air, “Yes!”

“But we’re doing things my way,” Shawn says, pointing a finger at her. “I make the game plan. Harrison we’ll find a way to get you in too.”

“Oh no,” Harrison laughs. “Please leave me out of this. I’d rather be surprised with that good story. That is if you two make it out alive.”

“We will,” Caroline chirps. “I’ve got a good feeling about this.”

…

Rampant knocks at the door would normally go unnoticed this time of night. Except Shawn is up late like he is every night. He's drinking coffee with an abnormal amount of sugar and creamer and immersing himself into a court case that happened decades ago. As far as anyone is concerned, staying up late on a school night to read is the most reckless he will be by himself. His first class isn't until noon so he figures this is okay for now.

So when Caroline comes knocking frantically at 1 AM, he’s wide awake on the couch.

He opens the door and the first thing he notices is her eyeglasses. The second is the tears threatening to fall down her face and how she’s out of breath. Crying doesn’t usually bother him. Mock trials can get emotional sometimes when they invite the theater students. And Kate cried often when things got bad, and they always got bad. Shawn knew how to handle crying. This was different though. For some reason, the Caroline he imagined didn't cry.

“Hey, what's-”

“I lost my sweater," she hiccups. "I-I think I left it at the mall, but I can’t remember t-taking it off. I retraced our steps for hours, but no one fucking had it. I didn't know where else to check.”

Shawn remembers that ridiculously oversized sweater. She left and forgot about it in the back seat of his car. Which makes sense, because all three of them kind of lost track of the day after the mall. It’s starting to become a running theme in the friend group. The shopping errand evolved into just another lazy Sunday and went well into the evening. After getting food in the mall, they got ice cream at a Cold Stone a few blocks away.

They sat and talked about high school and why it sucked. Where they wanted to go in the world. Who they would want to have a conversation with, dead or alive. And Caroline said her mom, who is incidentally dead. She was four when it happened so it doesn't make her too sad. Then they walked through downtown until it got too dark to be safe.

Without saying a word, Shawn pulls her into the living area by her shoulder and places a finger to his lips. She nods and takes a seat on the couch. He goes back to his bedroom.

Caroline’s sweater is exactly where he left it: neatly folded on his desk next to the leather journal. He was going to return it when he first noticed it discarded and alone in the back seat of his car, but he figured she would come back once she saw it was missing. Now he feels guilty, realizing he could have just gone down to her room on the second floor and just returned it to her hours ago.

She’s looking at all his papers scattered on the coffee table when he returns to the living room. “You’re like a real lawyer, huh,” she asks, now a bit calmer but still sniffly.

“Getting there, yes.” Shawn hands her the sweater, and it's crazy how quickly her mood changes. She exhales and buries her face in it. “You left it in my car," he explains. "I would've given it back sooner, but I thought you might come to me first. Then I forgot, which is stupid-”

He shuts up when Caroline traps him in a hug, lifting herself onto her toes. Shawn stays frozen in place for a moment before he wraps his arms around her shoulders. He doesn’t dare rest his chin on her neck. In his mind, they aren’t there yet. So he settles for rubbing her shoulders. Caroline taps his back to signal the end of the hug.

“Thank you.” She chuckles and it sounds tear-stained. “Sorry I came here bawling my eyes out in the middle.”

"It’s fine. Sorry I held onto your sweater."

"I'm just glad it's safe." She bites the inside of her lip. “And I trust you.”

"Oh."

Caroline wipes her cheeks silently with her palms. She hasn't looked him in the eye since she walked in. He looks around the room for a box of tissues on the side table and offers them to her. She only takes one for her nose.

"I have to be honest, I thought we'd have a little more time before one of us started crying in front of the other. Now I feel like I have to cry in front of you pretty soon. "

Shawn was only half hoping this would make her laugh. He never really thought of himself as funny, but it's worth a shot.

She sniffles again. "Are you trying to cheer me up?"

"Uh...no," he lies.

Caroline smirks, knowing the truth. She doesn't bother calling him out this time.

"I suppose I should ask if you're okay?"

This time she giggles. "That is what normal people do, yeah."

He shakes his head at her, then holds out his hand. "Give me your phone."

She takes it out of her back pocket and unlocks it before handing it over. The case is surprisingly practical and plain for someone with such a colorful personality. He finds her contacts and saves his number under the name "Shawn Mendes."

Caroline sniffs again. "How lame," she quips. "I'll change it later."

"Rename me whatever you want. Just please just call me the next time this happens," he says sternly.

She sends a text immediately. It says "ok."

A hush falls over them. Only Harrisons snores can be heard through the walls. Shawn rolls his eyes. Caroline snickers.

"Guess I'll leave you to your, uhm, homework?"

"Well no," Shawn peeks at the mess of papers, "just a little light reading, I guess."

Caroline's mouth twitches, like she was trying to muster a smile. Her tired eyes meet his caffeinated ones. "That's really cool, Shawn."

He folds his arms across his broad chest. "It is?"

"Yeah. You're actually into it for the career, not the money. Unlike some people."

Shawn looks down at his socks. Sometimes Caroline really is too much for him.

She's turning to leave and Shawn is starting to panic a little because he feels like he should say or do something.

"Thanks again," she mumbled.

"C-Caroline?"

She stops in between the door and its frame. For the first time in a long time, Shawn didn't think before he spoke. So silence follows. He just looks at her in the doorway. Enigmatic Caroline.

"What is it Shawn," she finally asks.

"Uh…I um, I didn't know you wore glasses."

“Oh,” she adjusts the frames on her face. “Yeah, sometimes. I try to stick to contacts.”

Then there’s nothing else to say, so she’s gone. Shawn’s left alone again in the mostly dark. He scratches his nape of his neck and wonders what the hell just happened.

“That was weak, my dude.”

Harrison leans on his bedroom door, snacking on granola. Shawn tosses a throw pillow at him.

…

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[maddie-grove]

The Top Twenty Books I Read in 2019

My main takeaways from the past year’s reading:

Sometimes you think something is happening because of magic, but then it turns out to have a non-magical explanation so weird that you find yourself saying, “You know what? I wish faeries or God were responsible for this. I’d honestly feel less disturbed.”

Stop bathing and changing your clothes and shaving for three years, three months, and three days. You’ll find out who your real friends are. I promise you that.

I want more books about bisexual ladies!!! Give them to me!!!

Anyway...

20. The Prodigal Duke by Theresa Romain (2017)

Childhood sweethearts Poppy Hayworth and Leo Billingsley were separated when his older brother, a duke, sent him away to make his fortune. Years later, the duke is dead, a financially successful Leo has come back to England to take his place, and Poppy has become a rope dancer at Vauxhall Gardens after a life-shattering event. New sparks are flying between them, but is love possible when so much else has changed? Leo and Poppy are believable and charming as old friends, Romain makes great use of obscure historical details from the oft-depicted Regency period, and I loved Leo’s difficult but caring elderly uncle.

19. Simple Jess by Pamela Morsi (1996)

Althea Winsloe, a young widow in 1900s Arkansas, has no interest in remarrying, but almost everyone in her small Ozarks community is pressuring her to remarry, and she still needs someone to help farm her land. Enter Jesse Best, a strong young man with cognitive disabilities who’s happy to take on the work. As he makes improvements to her farm and bonds with her three-year-old son, Althea gets to know him better and starts to see him in a new light. This earthy romance could’ve been a disaster, but instead it illustrates how people with disabilities are often...uh...simplified and de-sexualized in a way that denies them autonomy. Morsi has a similarly nuanced take on Althea and Jesse’s community, which is claustrophobic and supportive all at once.

18. Leah on the Offbeat by Becky Albertalli (2018)

Outspoken and insecure, bisexual high school senior Leah Burke is having a tough year. Her friend group is in turmoil, her single mom is seriously dating someone, and she’s caught between a sweet boy she’s not sure about and a pretty, perfect straight girl who couldn’t possibly be into her...right??? The sequel to the very cute Simon vs. the Homo Sapiens Agenda, Leah on the Offbeat pulls a The Godfather: Part II with its messy protagonist, sweetly surprising romance, and masterful comic set piece involving the Atlanta American Girl Doll restaurant.

17. Copper Sun by Sharon M. Draper (2006)

Kidnapped from her home in eighteenth-century Ghana, fifteen-year-old Amari is sold into slavery and winds up on a South Carolina plantation, where she faces terrible cruelty but finds friends in an enslaved cook, her little son, and eventually a sulky white indentured servant around her age. When their master escalates his already-atrocious behavior, the three young people flee south to the Spanish Fort Mose in search of freedom. Draper’s complicated characters, vivid descriptions, and deft handling of heavy subjects makes for top-notch historical YA fiction.

16. A Prince on Paper by Alyssa Cole (2019)

After her controlling politician father was jailed for poisoning a bunch of people in their small, prosperous African country, Nya Jerami gained unprecedented freedom but also became the subject of vicious gossip. Johan von Braustein, the hard-partying stepson of a European monarch, wants to help her, partly because he sympathizes and partly because he has a crush, but she thinks he’s too frivolous and horny (if wildly attractive). After an embarrassing misunderstanding compels them to enter a fake engagement, though, she begins to wonder if there’s more to him. I’m not a huge fan of contemporary romance, but this novel has the perfect combination of heartfelt emotion, delicious melodrama, and adorable fluff. 

15. One Perfect Rose by Mary Jo Putney (1997)

Stephen, the Duke of Ashburton, has always done the proper and responsible thing, but that all changes when he learns that he’s terminally ill. Wandering the countryside in the guise of an ordinary gentleman, he ends up joining an acting troupe and falling in love with Rosalind, the sensible adopted daughter of the two lead actors. Like another Regency romance on this list, this novel celebrates love in many forms: there’s the love story between Stephen and Rosalind, yes, but there’s also Rosalind’s loving relationship with her adopted family, the new bonds she forms with her long-lost blood relatives, the way her two families embrace the increasingly frightened Stephen, and the healing rifts between Stephen and his well-meaning but distant siblings. Stephen’s reconciliation with his mortality is also moving.

14. My One and Only Duke by Grace Burrowes (2018)

Facing a death sentence in Newgate, footman-turned-prosperous banker Quinton Wentworth decides to do one last good thing: marry Jane McGowan, a poor pregnant widow, so she and the baby will be financially set. Then he receives a pardon and a dukedom at the literal last minute, meaning that he and Jane have a more permanent arrangement than either intended. I fell in love with the kind-but-difficult protagonists almost at once, and with Burrowes’s gorgeous prose even faster. 

13. Eleanor and Park by Rainbow Rowell (2013)

It’s 1986, and comics-loving, post-punk-listening, half-Korean Park and bright, weird, constantly bullied Eleanor are just trying to get through high school in their rough Omaha neighborhood. He’s only grudgingly willing to let her share his bus seat at first, but this barely civil acquaintance slowly thaws into friendship and blossoms into love. Far from being the whimsical eighties-nostalgia-fest I expected, this is a bittersweet love story about two isolated young people who find love, belonging, and a chance for self-expression with each other in an often-hostile environment (a small miracle pre-Internet).

12. Shrill by Lindy West (2016)

In this memoir, Lindy West talks about the difficulties of being a fat woman, the thankless task of being vocally less-than-enthused about rape jokes, the joys of moving past self-doubt, and the very real possibility that Little John from Disney’s Robin Hood was played by “bear actor” Baloo, among other subjects. I was having a hard time during my last semester of law school this past spring, and this book’s giddy humor and inspiring messages really helped me in my hour of need.

11. Seduction: Sex, Lies, and Stardom in Howard Hughes's Hollywood by Karina Longworth (2018)

In 1925, very young businessman Howard Hughes breezed into Hollywood with nothing but tons of family wealth, a soon-to-be-divorced wife, and a simple dream: make movies about fast planes and big bosoms. He got increasingly weird and reactionary over the next thirty years, then retired from public life. More a history of 1920s-1950s Hollywood than a biography, this book has the same sharp writing and in-depth film analysis that makes me love Longworth’s podcast You Must Remember This.

10. The Beguiled by Thomas Cullinan (1966)

In Civil-War-era Virginia, iron-willed Martha Farnsworth and her nervous younger sister try to run their nearly empty girls’ boarding school within earshot of a battlefield. When one girl finds Union soldier John McBurney injured in the woods, she brings him back to the house, where he exploits every conflict and secret among the eight girls and women (five students, two sisters, and one enslaved cook). Charming and manipulative, he nevertheless finds himself in over his head. Cullinan makes great use of the eight POVs and the deliciously claustrophobic setting; it’s fascinating to watch the power dynamics and allegiances shift from scene to scene.

9. A Gentleman Never Keeps Score by Cat Sebastian (2018)

Reserved tavern keeper Sam Fox wants to help out his brother’s sweetheart by finding and destroying a nude portrait she once sat for; disgraced gentleman Hartley Sedgwick isn’t sure what he wants after having his life ruined twice over, but he happened to inherit his house from the man who commissioned the painting...plus he’s not exactly reluctant to assist kind, handsome Sam in his quest. I wrote about this heart-melting romance two times last year; suffice it to say that it’s not only one of the best Regencies I’ve ever read, but also possibly the best romance I’ve ever read about the creation of a found family.

8. Frog Music by Emma Donoghue (2014)

Blanche Beunon, a French-born burlesque dancer in 1876 San Francisco, has a lot going on: her mooching boyfriend has turned on her, her sick baby is missing, and her cross-dressing, frog-hunting friend Jenny Bonnet was just shot dead right next to her. In the middle of a heat wave, a smallpox epidemic, and a little bit of mob violence, she must locate her son and solve Jenny’s murder. This is a glorious work of historical fiction; you can see, hear, smell, and feel the chaotic world of 1870s San Francisco, plus Blanche’s character arc is amazing.

7. The Patrick Melrose novels (Never Mind, Bad News, Some Hope, Mother’s Milk, and At Last) by Edward St. Aubyn (1992, 1992, 1994, 2005, and 2012, respectively)

Born to an embittered English aristocrat and an idealistic American heiress, Patrick Melrose lives through his father’s sadistic abuse and his mother’s willful blindness (Never Mind),  does a truly staggering amount of drugs in early adulthood (Bad News), and makes a good-faith effort at leading a normal life (Some Hope). Years later, the life he’s built with his wife and two sons is threatened by his alcoholism and reemerging resentment of his mother (Mother’s Milk), but there may be a chance to salvage something (At Last). Despite the suffering and cruelty on display, these novels were the farthest thing from a dismaying experience, thanks to the sharp characterization, grim humor, and great sense of setting. Also, I love little Robert Melrose, an anxious eldest child after my own heart. 

6. The Perilous Gard by Elizabeth Marie Pope (1974)

In 1550s England, no-nonsense Kate Sutton is exiled to the Perilous Gard, a remote castle occupied by suspicious characters, including the lord’s guilt-ridden younger brother Christopher. Troubled by the holes she sees in the story of the tragedy that haunts him, she does some problem-solving and ends up in a world of weird shit. Cleverly plotted, deliciously spooky, and featuring an all-time-great heroine, this book was an absolute treat. The beautiful Richard Cuffari illustrations in my edition didn’t hurt, either.

5. An Unconditional Freedom by Alyssa Cole (2019)

Daniel Cumberland, a free black man from New England traumatized from being sold into slavery, and Janeta Sanchez, a mixed-race Cuban-Floridian lady from a white Confederate family, have been sent on a mission to the Deep South by the Loyal League, a pro-Union spy organization. Initially hostile to everyone (but particularly to somewhat naive Janeta), Daniel warms to his colleague, but will her secrets, his shattered faith in justice, and the various dangers they face prevent them from falling in love? Nah. Alyssa Cole’s historical romances deliver both on the history and the romance, and this is one of her strongest entries.

4. The Lady’s Guide to Celestial Mechanics by Olivia Waite (2019)

Heartbroken by the death of her father and the marriage of her ex-girlfriend, Lucy Muchelney decides she needs a change of scenery and takes a live-in position translating a French astronomy text for Catherine St. Day, the recently widowed Countess of Moth. Catherine, used to putting her interests on hold for an uncaring spouse, is intrigued by this awkward, independent lady. I’ve read f/f romances before, but this sparkling Regency was the first to really blow me away with its fun banter, neat historical details, and perfect sexual tension.

3. The Wager by Donna Jo Napoli (2010)

After losing his entire fortune to a tidal wave, Sicilian nineteen-year-old Don Giovanni de la Fortuna sinks into poverty and near-starvation. Then Devil makes him an offer: all the money he wants for as long as he lives if he doesn’t bathe, cut his hair, shave, or change his clothes for three years, three months, and three days. This fairy-tale retelling is an extraordinarily moving fable about someone who learns to acknowledge his own suffering, recognize it in others, and extend compassion to all. 

2. Vampires in the Lemon Grove by Karen Russell (2013)

In this collection, Russell weaves strange tales of silkworm-women hybrids in Japan, seagulls who collect objects from the past and future, and, yes, vampires in the lemon grove. She also posits the very important question: “What if most (but not all) U.S. presidents were reincarnated as horses in the same stable and had a lot of drama going on?” My favorite stories were “Proving Up” (about a nineteenth-century Nebraska boy who encounters death and horror on the prairie), “The Graveless Doll of Eric Mutis” (about a disadvantaged high school student who discovers an effigy of the even more hapless boy he tormented), and “The Barn at the End of the Term” (the horse-president story). 

1. The Wonder by Emma Donoghue (2016)

Lib Wright, an Englishwoman who has floundered since her days working for Florence Nightingale during the Crimean War, is hired to observe Anna O’Donnell, an eleven-year-old Irish girl famous for not eating for four straight months. With a jaundiced attitude towards the Irish and Catholicism, Lib is confident that she’ll quickly expose Anna as a fraud, but she finds herself liking the girl and getting increasingly drawn into the disturbing mystery of her fast. Like The Perilous Gard, this novel masterfully plays with the possibility of the supernatural, then introduces a technically mundane explanation that’s somehow much more eerie. Donoghue balances the horror and waste that surrounds Anna, though, with the clear, bright prose and the moving relationship that develops between her and Lib, who grows beyond her narrow-mindedness and emotional numbness. I stayed up half the night to finish this novel, which cemented Emma Donoghue’s status as my new favorite author.

[banditthewriter]

Don’t Listen To Them - Billy Russo

Prompt: Reader really likes Billy but because of gossips she's worried that he'll leave her after one night. Luckily Billy surprises her by showing her how different and loving he is. Prompter: @slytheringranger

Thanks for the request darling! I hope this is what you wanted! 

Tags are at the bottom. Let me know if you would like to be added to one of my tag lists!

*gif is mine*

Enjoy!

***** The first time you met Billy Russo, you were almost ready to write him off as just a pretty face. Within the first five minutes, you realized that you probably misjudged him. Billy was attractive, sure, but he was also smart, funny, and honest in a way that was refreshing. And so what if he paid more attention to you than he did to your editor? It wasn't like you asked him to ignore her; you were supposed to be a shadow. Your editor had even told you not to say anything since she had assumed that the subject of the article was going to be some sort of asshole. Instead the subject of the article had been thoughtful, interesting, and completely bewitched by you. At some point your editor simply passed you the questions and then slipped from the room. "So, Mr Russo," you said, clearing your throat as you looked over the remaining questions. "Do you—" "Billy," he corrected with a smile, shifting a bit in the chair before he leaned forward to rest his forearms on the table. "I prefer to be called Billy by people I get along with; Mr Russo is for the people at Anvil." You returned the smile as you tapped your pen against the pad of paper you were holding. "Billy then. Do you plan on expanding Anvil beyond the one location?" He shrugged and leaned back in his chair, professional once more. "Anvil works out of different countries, but yeah we're only based here in the city. Would I like to expand and help these people in other states? Sure. But I prefer to be able to work with them, to look them in the eye every day that they work for me." "So you prefer the hands on approach," you said as you made a note on the paper, checking that your phone was still recording. He leaned forward once more and this time the smile was more of a smirk. "Oh, you can definitely say that I like the hands on approach," he said, his tongue darting out to wet his bottom lip. His smirk widened when he noticed that you tracked the movement. "Would it be too forward of me to ask you out for dinner?" Your pen froze over the paper as you blinked up at the man across from you. He was grinning and didn't look phased at all. "Uh," you began, clearing your throat and shifting a bit, casting a pointed look at your phone, "do you think this is the best time to ask that?" "I have no shame when it comes to going after what I want," he said honestly with a one armed shrug. "You can put that in the article, by the way." You couldn't help but laugh. You also couldn't help agreeing to the date. You knew you'd regret it if you didn't so what choice did you really have? ------ It took a while for the two of you to match up your schedules for a date. He got slammed at Anvil and you were on deadlines, but you talked often. For some reason it surprised you that be was being a gentleman in the conversations. When you brought that up with him, he seemed almost offended. "What, did you think I'd be asking you to send me dirty pictures or something?" At your awkward silence, he let out a laugh. "Jesus. Well at least you didn't lie." "I'm sorry," you said in a rush, tucking one of your legs under yourself as you shifted on the couch in your office, "I shouldn't have judged you like that. It wasn't fair to me. I don't know you anymore than you know me." "That's why you go on dates, right?" You could hear his smile as you agreed with his flawless argument there. "So what do you say? I think we've dragged our feet enough. Let's go on a real date." You smiled and admitted that he was right. "Pick a time and a place." Simple as that. ------ The restaurant that Billy picked was the picture definition of being off the beaten path. It was tucked into an alley way and if he hadn't been leading you, you didn't think you would have found it by yourself. The clientele was a mix of businessmen and hipster college students, but it worked. "I don't want to take the chance that we'll be recognized," he explained as he pulled out a chair for you to sit at the table. "Not that I think it'd be a problem that we're dating, but I don't want to be interrupted." "Dating, are we?" He smirked but didn't answer. When the waiter came over, he took your drink orders and then wandered off, leaving the two of you alone again. You were in the back of the restaurant with your back to the rest of the room. Every now and then, Billy's eyes shot up like he was keeping stock of the room and it clicked around the third time you caught him casing the place. "Old habits?" At his curious look, you gestured to where he was sitting. "You like to sit where you can watch the bulk of the occupants of the room." He raised the glass that the waiter put in front of him in a toast to your observational skills, but you weren't a journalist for the fun of it. You were good at your job. The two of you took turns telling stories about yourselves for a while after that. He had a few humorous stories to tell from the service and you told him about getting sexiled from your dorm every Friday for an entire semester before you finally requested a single room. The most startling thing about the date was that it was never awkward. Even the lulls while the two of you were eating weren't uncomfortable. It was possible the best first date you'd ever been on. He would lean forward and brush his fingers against your cheek or let his hand brush yours on the table. Not wanting him to feel discouraged, you bumped your ankle against his and let it stay hooked there for a moment. It felt like the flirting you did in high school or college; innocent and chaste. The only difference was the look in his eyes. There was genuine attention there, but there was something else. A warmth, or maybe more aptly a hunger. Yes, hunger, that was the word you were looking for. He looked at you the same way you'd seen people look at a particularly appetizing meal. Not that you felt much differently. While you were never one to invite a guy back to your place on the first date, you were sorely rethinking that plan with him in front of you. Nearing the end of the meal, you watched as he stiffened a bit in his chair. His eyes were directed over your shoulder and when you started to turn, he cleared his throat. "Are we thinking about dessert? I've heard good things about their cheesecake here." You watched as he grabbed the dessert menu but he was shooting quick glances over your shoulder in a way that still made you want to turn. Instead you checked the hallway nearby and gave him a quick smile. "I'm going to head to the restroom for a moment," you said as you stood up, grabbing your purse as you did so. "Go ahead and order a piece of that cheesecake so we can see if it lives up to the hype." The answering smile was honest and made you relax a bit as you walked towards the restrooms. There was still an urge to check in the direction that he had been looking, but you restrained yourself as you let the door shut behind you. After finishing up in the stall, you stepped out and froze when you saw someone you hadn't heard come into the bathroom standing near the sinks. You met her eyes and gave her a quick smile before you walked over to the sinks to wash your hands. "You're here with Billy Russo?" There was something in her voice that made you pause before you continued your movements. "Do you work with him at Anvil?" That was a strange question. You glanced at her as you walked over to the paper towel dispenser. "No," you said uneasily, not sure you should be giving her any more information than that. "Hm, so this is a date then?" When you didn't answer, she rolled her eyes and crossed her arms over her chest. "I just wanted to catch you in here so that I could give you some helpful hints. Billy Russo is a one and done kind of guy and if you sleep with him, he'll never call you again. And of course if you don't sleep with him, he'll get bored and will stop calling you." Well. You threw away the paper towels and started towards the door, not giving her another look. You watched her take a step towards you, but when you stepped out, she wasn't following you. Billy's eyes darted up to you as you approached. There was a layer of apprehension on him that wasn't there when you'd left, but when you settled back down in your chair, he relaxed a bit. "I have one piece of cheesecake and two forks," he said as he gestured to the plate that was sitting in the middle of the table. "This could be life changing. Are you ready?" Your eyes darted for a second to the woman as she was leaving the bathroom and then you looked back down at the cheesecake. It looked almost too good to eat. "Let's do this," you said as you lowered your fork to the dessert. ------ Weirdness in the ladies room aside, the date was perfect. The two of you had a lot of common interests and by the time he was paying the bill, you were revisiting that idea about inviting him back to your place. Not wanting to seem to forward, you decided to play it by ear. As he walked you out onto the street, you could tell that he wanted to say something and you were pretty sure you knew what that something was going to be. There were sparks flying off both of you at this point and your head was buzzing with the two glasses of wine you'd had with dinner. "Billy," a voice called and the two of you turned to see a black man walking up to the two of you with a smile. "Didn't know you were going to be out this way." The guy gave you a quick look, his smile never wavering, and then he was looking back at Billy. Billy wrapped his arm around your waist and tugged you in. It didn't feel proprietary; it felt like he was showing you off instead. "Wanted to take Y/N somewhere nice," he said as he tilted his head towards you. "Come on Curtis, you gotta talk me up here buddy." Curtis grinned and turned his full attention to you, holding out his hand for a handshake. "Not much I can say to talk him up that you probably don't already know, but I can tell you that it's a good sign that you're here with him. I mean, you're the first girl that I've seen him with twice." He said it with a smile and a laugh, but his eyes darted between the two of you once his words were out. Maybe he saw something on your face because he immediately looked at Billy who had gone rigid at your side. "Actually, Curtis," you said, trying not to pull out of Billy's grasp then and there, "this is the first time I'm meeting you. It's the first time I've been out with Billy." Curtis seemed to realize that he had stuck his foot in it. All he could do is look between the two of you before he gestured rather clumsily behind him. "I'm gonna... nice to meet you Y/N. Billy." You thought you saw him mouth something at Billy, but you weren't focusing on him. Instead you were thinking about what the woman in the bathroom had said about Billy and starting to feel like a fool. Billy tugged you a bit closer to him but you carefully moved away. "Y/N," he began, but you shook your head and gave him a smile. "Tonight has been great," you said honestly, not bothering to add 'up until now' since it was obvious, "but I'm really tired and I have an early morning. I think I'm just going to head home." You got maybe two feet away when he was there, grabbing your wrist and turning you so that you were facing him once more. "Come on Y/N, I feel like we've gotten off to the wrong foot here. Up until now, we were doing fine." You were. In fact, up until that moment, you were thinking that this might be the beginning of something wonderful. And now? "I'll talk to you soon," you said as you pulled your arm free. He didn't try to stop you again, simply watched as you flagged down a cab and slipped inside. After you gave the driver your address, you turned your head and caught a glimpse of Billy before the car started to move. You weren't certain, but you thought that he looked as disappointed as you felt. ------ Over the next few days, you got a dozen texts and calls from Billy. It wasn't like you wanted to ignore him, but it made more sense than letting yourself get even more attached. And how did you get attached so quickly? Never before had you ever gone on one date with a guy and then start thinking in terms of the future. What was it about Billy that had you so spun out? Your phone was ringing again and you stared at it from your spot at your desk. You were spending more and more time at work to try to keep yourself busy. He usually only called once a day, so when the phone fell silent, you breathed a sigh of relief and relaxed in your chair. He'd give up at some point. He was just enjoying the chase because he didn't get what he wanted. Only that didn't feel right. It didn't seem like Billy was trying to get you into bed. The two of you talked for a week and a half between that first meeting and the date and never did you feel like he was just biding his time. He was never overly sexual towards you, although there was always a thin line at the way he was looking at you in a crowded room and how you imagined he'd look at you spread out on his bed. Did someone turn up the heat? You tugged at the collar of your shirt and pushed your chair back, about to cross over to your windows to crack one when your phone lit up with another call. It was a local number but it wasn't saved in your phone. Thinking about the various people you'd been reaching out to for comments on articles, you grabbed the device and answered the call. "Y/N Y/L/N," you said in greeting, scooting back to the desk in case you needed to take a message. "So your phone does work," came a voice that you didn't expect. "Y/N? You hang up on me?" "No Billy," you said, eyes clenched shut as you cursed your stupidity, "I didn't hang up on you." You should. In fact you still should. The only thing was that you didn't want to. "You've been avoiding me. I've been calling and texting every day and it took me calling from my office to get you to answer." True enough. "Listen Billy," you began, but he cut in before you could continue. "Our date was going great and yeah, the thing with Curtis was awkward, but I don't think that would have caused you to run off like that. What else was it, huh?" "I'm not trying for a broken heart Billy," you said softly. "I'm looking for real; I want more than a quick tumble. I like you but I can't get involved with less." You weren't sure what you expected to hear from that. It wasn't like you thought he was going to profess his undying love or something; in reality, you'd given up on anything with Billy, much less something meaningful. It was all a fantasy that you'd been woken up from finally. "I don't want that either," Billy admitted equally as soft. "I'd like to give us a chance for more. I'm not saying we'll last, but don't you think we owe it to ourselves to fucking try rather than to let everyone else decide things for us? There's more to me than what people see and I thought you could see that." Could you? You honestly thought that you could. Maybe it was all just a misunderstanding. Maybe you could find a way.

”I like you and I think you like me too. There’s potential here for us and I think we deserve the chance to try.”

He was right.  "Okay," you said with a deep breath. "One chance." You knew you'd made the right decision. "I won't let you regret this." ------ The restaurant was littered with businessmen and hipsters alike. Billy had groaned when he saw the line out front, but you had called ahead to make a reservation. Sure enough, Curtis and his girlfriend Amy were already at the table. "This way," you said as you tugged on Billy's sleeve, waving at the pair at the table. He sighed and wrapped his arm around your waist. "Have I told you lately how grateful I am to have you in my life?" The two of you sat down at the table after giving Curtis and Amy each a hug. Amy was eager to tell the two of you about Curtis making a fool out of himself when he met her parents, barely letting you guys order a drink before she launched into the story. "I've never seen a man back pedal so fast," she said through her laughter. You sent a grin to the man in question, nudging Billy's shoulder a bit. "Why don't you tell her about the first time I met him?" Amy was grinning wide as she looked between the three of you while Curtis was trying to change the subject, shaking his head because he knew there was no use. And Billy was laughing. "Oh, you want to hear about a man back pedaling? Let me set the scene for you." Billy was getting into the story telling, setting up the scene like some sort of Greek tragedy. Curtis had covered his face at one point but you could see his shoulders shaking at Billy's storytelling. Amy, bless her, was listening intently with a grin that said that she was storing this information for later. Movement nearby drew your attention and you glanced over to see who it was. It took you a moment to place her face, but then it hit you because Billy had just mentioned you going to the bathroom on your first date—"Part of me thought she might be trying to climb out through a window"—and you knew that this was the woman that had cornered you that night. She looked surprised to see you and then she caught sight of who you were leaning against and her eyes widened even further. You couldn't remember her exact words from that night, but you knew that she would be surprised to see him with you after so much time. Unable to keep from rubbing salt in the wound a little more, you draped your arm over Billy's shoulder while not interrupting the story, making sure the glint from your wedding ring caught her eye. It had taken almost three years, but you finally got revenge for her sabotaging your first date. Billy leaned over and pressed his lips to yours, barely pausing in the story for the time it took, and you saw the smirk on his face. Maybe you hadn't been as stealthy as you had thought, but you didn't mind. You and Billy had worked it out in the end.

X

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ML: Are They Worthy? Chapter 28: Kindred Spirits!

Vlad spent some of his free time during the school day manning a little booth he set up to sell Pride flag pins and sign people up for Paris Pride. Juleka and Rose were some of the first to stop by. “Hey Vlad.”

“Hey Juleka. Rose” Vlad replied.

“Hi Vlad. I love that you’re helping out with this event” Rose said.

“You can too. All you gotta do is sign here” Vlad said, displaying a piece of paper.

The two of them signed it. “So, does this also allow us to walk in the parade as well?” Juleka asked.

“No” Vlad replied. “For that, you need to sign THIS piece of paper.” He presented a second piece of paper. “If you want to walk together, you only need to take up one slot.”

“Ooooo. How fun!” Rose said. The two of them signed that one as well.

“Now, can I interest you ladies in some pins?” asked Vlad.

“Of course! That’s why we’re here!” Rose said.

“I’ll take a lesbian one” Juleka said.

“I’ll take a bi one!” Rose said.

“Sure thing” Vlad said.

After school, Marinette was walking out when she saw Adrien’s car. “Um, I thought Adrien had fencing after school,” she said.

“I do” said Adrien appearing behind her. “It’s for you.”

“Me?! No. I couldn’t, I-”

“Relax Marinette” Adrien said. “Father is helping you in any way he can. This is him trying to help.”

Marinette paused. “O-OK then” she said. She walked up to Adrien’s bodyguard. He opened the door for her. “Thank you.” She said Adrien’s bodyguard was caught off guard by this. He looked away and blushed at the compliment. Marinette got in, and then the bodyguard got in, and they drove off.

Adrien’s stare lingered a little bit. “Isn’t Marinette cute when she gets nervous?” Vlad asked from behind Adrien. “Or is it cuter when she’s confident?”

Adrien turned around. “Vlad” he said. “I’m not fully over Ladybug to admit what I think yet.”

“Well, you don’t need to be fully over her, you just need to be over her enough” Vlad said.

“Is this why you’re here Vlad? To get me to maybe ask Marinette out?” Adrien said.

“No, that’s just a bonus” Vlad said. He went to whisper into Adrien’s ear “I actually need to talk about some hero stuff.”

“Well can it wait? I’ve got fencing” Adrien said.

“No problem. I can watch” Vlad said.

Adrien was surprised. “I’m not sure if Mr. D'Argencourt will allow it.”

“No harm in asking, right?” Vlad said.

When they asked, Mr. D'Argencourt said “I will allow it.” Vlad and Adrien got excited. “IF you can beat one of my students.”

“Sure, I’ll go against him” Adrien said.

“Part le fer! If Vlad is to face off against anyone, it’s someone who won’t let him win because he has a vested interest in it” Mr. D’Argentcourt.

“I get it. Fencing is serious business” Vlad said. “So, who am I taking on?”

“How about Kagami?” Adrien asked.

“She wouldn’t happen to be in on this” Mr. D'Argencourt said. “I know how close you and her are.”

“No sir. They haven’t even met yet” Adrien said.

Mr. D’Argencourt stared Adrien down. “Well, since I know you wouldn’t lie to me… KAGAMI!”

Kagami ran over after wrapping up a practice match. “Yes sir” she said, lifting her helmet up.

“This young man is named Vlad. He wants to watch today’s practice. Please see to it that he earns that spot” D’Argencourt said.

“Yes sir!” Kagami said.

“Is that all you know how to say?” Vlad said.

“Vlad. Don’t antagonize her” Adrien said.

“He’s right. I don’t play nice” Kagami said.

“Oh ho ho. Interesting” Vlad said. “Wanna know something? I don’t play nice either.” Kagami lowered her helmet. “Anyway, where do I suit up?” Adrien led Vlad to the locker rooms.

A few minutes later, Vlad and Kagami were squaring off. “Pret… allez!” Mr. D’Argencourt called. Vlad and Kagami were going against each other really hard. Their movements were aggressive, yet elegant. Eventually though, Vlad got a hit on Kagami. Mr. D’Argencourt was shocked. Still, as a gentleman and a lover of the sport, he signaled Vlad and declared him the winner.

Vlad lifted his helmet and said “Still got it.”

“Young man, how did you become such a good fencer?” Mr. D’Argencourt asked.

“I was the top fencer back at my school in Toulouse” Vlad explained.

“Well, if you are interested in joining, we could certainly use a talent such as yourself” Mr. D’Argencourt said.

“Unfortunately, I can’t” Vlad said.

“Why not?” Kagami asked angrily.

Vlad sighed. “Because I was eventually kicked off the team,” he explained.

“What happened?” Kagami asked.

“Well, as I said earlier, I don’t play nice” Vlad said. “When I don’t like someone I am very clear about it. One person I didn’t like just happened to be on the fencing team. He gathered a bunch of other students, and tried to ambush me. Lucky for me, I can hold my own. They however could not, and things got messy. I explained to everyone what had happened, and he promptly kicked both the orchestrator of the attack and me off the team. Although, mine was supposed to be temporary, I made it permanent. I didn’t feel like I could work well there. I really only liked one other person on the team. It just wasn’t a good fit.”

“Well, if you change your mind, my invitation stands” Mr. D’Argencourt said. “Although, I do want to check on this incident. What was your instructor’s name?”

“Mr. Renaud” Vlad told him.

“Renaud? As in Bernard Renaude?” Mr. D’Argencourt said.

“Yeah. Why?” Vlad said.

“I used to go to school with him” Mr. D’Argencourt said. “Anyway, you may watch. Everyone else. ALLEZ!” Vlad went to sit on the sidelines while everyone began practice. Kagami looked at Vlad, concerned. She eventually went to practice as well.

Meanwhile, Marinette was busy working on her designs in Gabriel’s home work station. “Your design looks great Marinette” Tikki said. “I’m sure Vlad and Adrien will love them.”

“Thanks Tikki” Marinette said. “I sure hope so. It’s nice of Mr. Agreste to let me use this room and his supplies. It gives me the confidence that I need to finish these.”

“Marinette you need to have to be confident in yourself” Tikki said.

Marinette came back with “Yeah, but-”

“Trust your instincts, Marinette” Tikki said.

Marinette smiled. “Thanks Tikki.” The door was opening. “Tikki, hide!” she whispered. Gabriel entered the room. “Mr. Agreste?”

“I thought I would keep you company” Gabriel said.

“Um, aren’t you busy?” Marinette asked.

“Not at the moment,” Gabriel said. “Besides, I know it can get kind of boring working on something alone.” He sat down next to Marinette. Marinette continued to work. “So, you like Adrien huh?”

Marientte was shocked by this sudden topic of conversation. “Well, of course. I mean, I like all my friends.”

“Marinette” Gabriel said in a tone that indicated he knew.

Marinette looked down. “Is it that obvious?” she asked.

Gabriel chuckled. “Relax. I don’t think he knows yet. I won’t tell if you won’t.”

Marinette turned to Gabriel and said “Well, I’m going to have to tell him eventually.”

“I suppose that’s true” Gabriel said.”But you know what I mean.” Marintte giggled. “You know, he speaks highly of you.”

Marinette was curious. “He does?”

“Yes” Gabriel said. “I’ve heard him refer to you as your class’s ‘Everyday Ladybug.’ You must be impressive to earn that title.”

“Well, I just do what I think is right,” Marinette said.

“Wouldn’t it be right to tell him how you feel?” Gabriel said.

“Oh. Well…” Marinette said. “Whenever I try, I get all nervous, and I freak out super hard. I mean, Adrien is just so perfect.”

“No he isn’t” Gabriel said. Marinette looked confused. “Well, at least that’s what he told me. He hates being seen as perfect. I’d agree with you, but after we spoke, I began to see his flaws. In his heart, he’s just as much a child as anyone his age. Maybe even more so.”

“In what ways?” Marinette asked.

“Well, this is his first time going to school. Meeting people outside of social events.To him, it’s like being in a candy store, and he’s allowed to pick whatever candy he wants” Gabriel explained.

“Oh. I didn’t know. He seems to be so calm about everything” Marinette said.

“It’s alright” Gabriel said. “You know, he gets that from his mother. She was such a calm, caring person. She loved seeing what the world had to offer, yet she remained calm. To be honest, sometimes I worry that I might be a bit too distant and Adrien gets nothing from me.”

“I don’t think that’s true” Marinette said. “I think he gets some of your kindness from you. I mean, you came here to keep me company apropos of nothing. Plus, I think you both function better with other people around.”

“What do you mean by that?” Gabriel asked.

“Well, it’s just that Vlad told me the story of how he and Adrien met” Marinette said. “He said you told Adrien that Nathalie is helping you maintain your sanity after your wife’s disappearance. I think it’s the same with Adrien. While his presence does light up the room, I think the room lights him up too.”

Gabriel was aghast. “I had never thought about it like that before. But you’re right. Having someone there certainly helps me. I don’t understand why I didn’t see why it could help Adrien as well. Especially since he has his mother’s ability to socialize. She was a social butterfly. Me? I’m more of a moth. Still, she knew when someone was sincere or not. Wanna hear about how we met?” Marinette nodded.

“Alright then” Gabriel said. “It all began when I had won a design contest. My prize was a ticket to a high class social event. I had trouble socializing, but I managed to keep a low profile. Or so I thought.”

“Hi there” Emilie said, reaching her hand out. Gabriel looked at her. “I thought when people do that, the other person was supposed to shake their hand.”

“Oh, uh..” Gabriel said, nervously. He reached out and shook Emilie’s hand.

“Thank you” Emilie said. “Now, correct me if I’m wrong, but aren’t you the talented young designer that won your way in here, correct?”

“Well yes I am, but…” Gabriel stuttered. “I...don’t do well at parties.”

“Wanna know something? Me either?” Emilie said. “Don’t get me wrong. I love meeting people, but these events just seem so overwhelming. I mean, there’s just so much I have to do to keep up appearances.”

“I more have trouble with the people aspect” Gabriel said.

“So, why did you enter the contest?” Emilie asked.

“Well, I’m an aspiring designer” Gabriel said. “I wanted to get my designs out there, simple as that. Tell me to talk to a stranger and I turn to stone. But if you ask me what their ideal outfit should be, then I’m your man.”

“So, what would my ideal outfit be?” Emilie asked.

Gabriel was taken aback. Nevertheless, he accepted the challenge. “Well, I think it would be an elegant yellow dress with one shoulder, a pair of white pumps, and a green necklace to match your eyes.”

“Wow” Emilie said.

“But, I also love what you have on currently” Gabriel said. She was wearing a white tank top, a yellow coat, a black fluffy skirt, white and black striped stockings, and a pair of white flats.

“You think so too? My friend Audrey designed this for me” Emilie said. She pointed her friend out.

“Wait, you’re friends with Audrey Bisset?” Gabriel said.

“Yeah. You know her?” Emilie said.

“Not personally” Gabriel said. “But she is the up and coming name in the world of style.”

Emilie took Gabriel’s hand. “She won’t be the only one.” Emilie dragged Gabriel to meet Audrey. “Hello Audrey. I just thought you would want to meet the young man who won the design contest.”

Audrey turned to Gabriel. “Well it’s about time you make yourself known. Just so you know, I was the deciding vote on the committee. So, you better thank me for letting you in here. And you should have met me first” she said.

“Audrey. Don’t be like that” Emilie said. “He doesn’t do well at parties.”

“I gathered that from when you had to drag him to me,” Audrey said.

“Thank you, Miss Bisset” Gabriel said.

Audrey handed Gabriel her business card. “If you have any more good ideas, let me be the first person you call.” She walked off.

“Well, that could have gone better,” Gabriel said.

“Nah, for Audrey, that was a great first encounter” Emilie said.

“I take it she’s not as personable as you” Gabriel said.

“Nope. But she’s really sweet once you get to know her” Emilie said.

“I’ll take your word on that, Miss…?” Gabriel said.

“Oh. Right. Emilie” she said. “Emilie Blanchet.”

“Gabriel Agreste” he responded.

“Enchante” she said.

“We spent the rest of the evening together” Gabriel said, telling the story to Marinette. “We laughed. We ate. We learned about each other. It was a magical evening. By the time the party was winding down, I found myself having a great time.”

“So, Miss Blanchet?” Gabriel said.

“Please, call me Emilie” she responded.

“Fine. Emilie” Gabriel said. “I had a great time with you tonight.”

“Me too, Gabriel” Emilie said.

“I don’t suppose we could meet again sometime. Could we?” Gabriel asked nervously.

“Of course” Emilie said. “Here, do you have a pen?” Gabriel handed her a pen. “Now, can I have Audrey’s card?” He gave that to her as well. Emilie wrote her number on the back of Audrey’s card. “Here you go.”

“Thank you, Emilie” Gabriel said. “I should give you my number” he said, trying to find something to write on. “You know? Because I’m not the best at socializing. Especially with someone as pretty as you.” Gabriel then blushed when he realized what he had said.

Emilie giggled. “You know? A lot of boys say that about me, but this is the first time I believe it.”

“Why is that?” Gabriel said, nervously.

“Partially because I didn’t tell you exactly HOW rich I am” Emilie began. “But more importantly, because I want to.” She gave him a kiss on the cheek. “Oo. Here.” Emilie grabbed a napkin. Gabriel focused as he wrote his number down. He had never been quite as flustered before. “Thank you” she said. “Well, I’ll see you later then.” She walked out the door.

Audrey was waiting for her. “Really? You wanna go out with that guy? You just met him” Audrey said.

“Well, when you know, you know. I have a good feeling about this guy” Emilie said.

“If you get bored, or he breaks your heart, I have a number of gentlemen callers. I’m sure one of them would like you” Audrey said.

“And yet, you always go back to Andre” Emilie retorted. Audrey scoffed and walked off. Emilie giggled, following her.

“And that’s how we met” Gabriel said.

Marinette was on the verge of tears. “What a beautiful story.”

Gabriel smiled. “Mind if I look at your designs?” he asked.

“Uhhhhhhhhh” Marintte said.

“It’s alright” Gabriel said. “I’m sure you did a good job. You’ve impressed both me and Audrey Bourgeois before. You don’t need to worry about anything.”

Marinette stared at him. “Well, OK,” she said, grabbing he sketches. She handed them to him. Gabriel looked over them. “I wanted to keep the design simple because I only have so much time to work on it but I also wanted it to be bold.”

“Well, I’d say you succeed in both of those” Gabriel said. “These look good Marinette. I’m sure you’ll have a bright future in the world of design.”

Marinette blushed. “Thank you, Mr. Agreste.”

After fencing practice wrapped up, Adrien met up with Vlad. “Ready to go?” Vlad asked.

“I need to change, but then I’ll be ready” Adrien said.

“Sure thing” Vlad said. Adrien walked off.

“Hey! Kagami called out. “How did you get so good at fencing?”

“Practice” Vlad said.

“That’s it?” Kagami said.

“Yeah” Vlad replied. “Although I’m a bit rusty. If I were battling you for the heck of it, you probably would have won. But because there was something I wanted, I tried harder.” Kagami looked perplexed. “What’s wrong?” Vlad asked.

“It’s nothing” Kagami said. “I just come from a family of fencers. I hate to be embarrassed. It reflects poorly on my mother and my grandfather.”

“Nonsense” Vlad said. “I’d say you have something worth fighting for there. That’s half the battle in my opinion. You’re an excellent fencer. You just gotta learn how to move forward after a loss.”

“I’ve been trying since I’ve got here…” Kagami said. “Sometimes it’s hard.”

“What happened?” Vlad asked.

“The day I arrived, I challenged Adrien to a match. It got really intense” Kagami explained. “It got so intense that we moved around, and the only person who was witnessing the event was this girl, Marinette.” Vlad’s eyebrow raised. “She called the victory in favor of Adrien. I was so upset that I was eventually Akumatized.”

“Sounds rough” Vlad said. “But it happens to the best of us.”

“Have you been Akumatized?” Kagami asked.

“No. But I’m new here. Give it time” Vlad said.

“I’ve been Akumatized twice” Kagami said. “Three times if you count Hero’s Day.”

“You know what that tells me?” Vlad asked. “It tells me your emotions are strong. You just need to not let them get the best of you.”

Kagami stared at Vlad. “Thanks” she said.

“OK. I’m ready” Adrien said. “Kagami?”

“I was just here talking to your friend,” she said. “He seems really nice.”

“I’m surprised” Adrien said.

“Why’s that?” Vlad said.

“It’s just that both of you can be hard-headed at times” Adrien said. “I was worried that it would turn ugly if you two met.”

“Well, if I were to fight him, you might be upset with me, and I don’t want that” Kagami said. “Even though I believe you are also worth fighting for.” Adrien smiled.

“We just had a lovely chat about fencing” Vlad said. “I didn’t want things to turn south either. Especially since you recommended I fight her in fencing.”

“What makes you say that?” Kagami said.

“Well, knowing Adrien, he wouldn’t let just anyone fight me” Vlad said. “He’s a little too nice for his own good sometimes. He wouldn't recommend someone who would lose to me in a heartbeat. He’s not that under-handed. No, he selected someone who he thinks could be a fair fight. And that scares me a little. Seeing how much he trusts you to do your best made me think ‘I don’t want to get on this person’s bad side.’”

Kagmi was shocked, and then blushed. “Thanks.”

“What can I say, Vlad? You can read me like a book” Adrien said. “Oh, by the way, Kagami.” Kagami looked up. “I have been thinking of switching targets recently. Would you mind giving me pointers?”

“Oh. Uh, sure” Kagami said. “Just give me a call.”

“Thanks” Adrien said. Kagami walked off to change.

“Boy, you are really bad at this, aren’t you?” Vlad said.

“Bad at what?” Adrien said.

Vlad giggled. “You seriously can’t see it? Boy, you’re hopeless.”

“Hey, come on. What’s this about?” Adrien asked. Vlad started walking off. “Vlad. Where are you going?”

“The exit” Vlad said. “Your ride is almost here, right?”

“Uh, yeah. Vlad, can you tell me what’s going on?” Adrien said.

“Maybe when we get in the car” Vlad said.

Back the Agreste’s, Marinette was wrapping up her work for the day. “Alright, that’s a good place to call it for now,” she said. “I should get going.”

She walked out of the room and was about to leave. “Finished for the day, Marinette?” Gabriel said.

“Oh, yeah” Marinette said. “I just wanted to get home before it’s too late.”

“My driver should be back any second. He can drop you off” Gabriel said.

“Oh. Thanks” Marinette said.

“You know, if I had known someone like you was out there, I might have let Adrien go out sooner,” Gabriel said.

Marinette blushed. “Oh. Thank you, Mr. Agreste.” Marinette walked out the door. Adrien’s car pulled up. The bodyguard walked out and opened the door. “Adrien? Vlad?”

“Oh, hey Marinette” Adrien said.

“You leaving?” Vlad asked.

“Uh, yeah. I didn’t want to stay too late. It is a school night, after all” Marinette said.

“Well, my bodyguard can take you home” Adrien said.

Marinette giggled. “You father told me as much. But thank you anyway.” She got in the car. “See you tomorrow?”

“Of course” Adrien said. The bodyguard got back into the car and drove off.

“Hey father” Adrien said. He was getting used to seeing his father more. “Vlad’s going to hang out for a little bit. He needs to talk to me about something. We’ll just be in my room.”

“Of course” Gabriel said. After all, he’s your friend, right?”

Adrien smiled. “Right.” The two of them went to Adrien’s room.

Gabriel walked into his office. “What’s on your mind, sir?” Nathalie asked.

“I was just thinking. If Emilie were here, she would have gobbled Marinette right up” Gabriel said.

Nathalie looked at her boos. “She will, Mr. Agreste. Just give it time.”

“Of course, Nathalie” Gabriel said. “Now I have another reason to get her back.”

In Adrien’s room, Adrien asked “So, you’re saying Kagami likes me?”

“Yup” Vlad said.

“I knew that” Adrien said, setting up Ultimate Mecha Strike III

“Really? Then why’d you play dumb?” Vlad said.

“Because I only know it as Cat Noir” Adrien said. “I didn't want to raise suspicions of anyone there by saying something I shouldn’t know.” He started playing.

Vlad was confused. “It was fairly obvious from the outset.”

“I don’t know about that” Adrien said.

Vlad sighed. Beyyo popped out. “Can we please talk about the matter at hand? I’m getting a headache hearing all of this love talk!”

“I second that” Plagg said. “Also, where’s my Camembert?”

“Vlad, can you get Plagg some cheese? It’s in the safe” Adrien asked.

“Sure” Vlad said. He went to the safe and grabbed some and gave it to Plagg.

“Thanks” Plagg said.

“Sure thing. Just stay far away from Beyyo” Vlad said.

“In a room this big, it should be manageable” Beyyo said.

“Whatever” Plagg said. He began munching on his cheese.

Vlad reached into his coat. “Here’s something for you too, Beyyo” he said, handing him some jerky.”

“Thanks” Beyyo said, munching down.

“So, what’s the problem?” Adrien asked.

“Well, last night we tested Chloe, and things got a little intense” Vlad said.

“In what way?” Adrien asked.

“Well, we asked what would happen if everyone listened to Chloe” Vlad began. “It ended with her stopping the world and crying.”

“What happened afterwards?” Adrien continued.

Vlad went on. “I stopped the dream and I had a chat with Chloe. She told me that she felt like she couldn’t be herself in front of people, so she came up with a mean persona so that when people hate her, at least it will be genuine, instead of hiding behind fake appreciation.”

“Did Chloe tell you why she couldn’t be herself?” Adrien inquired.

“No. But I assume you know” Vlad said.

“I’m not telling” Adrien said.

“I wouldn’t expect you to” Vlad retorted. “Anyway, Ladybug is worried about leaving Chloe alone for too long. So I came to you because you know Chloe so well. How would you recommend speeding things up?”

Adrien smiled. “Well, if it is what I think it is, I don’t think Chloe will be ready until she admits that secret to people. And you can’t force that. However, it seems like Chloe is at least ready to change. So maybe we just need to keep pushing her in the right direction.”

“I see” Vlad said. “Say, if I were to learn her secret, would you agree to meet with her about it with me as Judgement Wolf?”

“Sure, but how do you plan on doing that?” Adrien asked.

“I think I’m going to run some more tests,” Vlad said. “If that’s alright with you.”

“Of course. Just don’t push her too hard. Maybe give her a break” Adrien said.

“Fine” Vlad said. “I’ll put it off until tomorrow. But Ladybug would like an answer sooner than later. For Chloe’s sake.”

“I know” Adrien said. “I want one too. She’s my oldest friend. Of course I want to protect her.” Vlad smiled.

“Double K.O.” the game said.

“I think I’m getting better” Adrien said. “Come Friday, I should be able to win.”

“Let’s hope so” Vlad said.

[calummwhatchasay]

x² + (3y/2 - √|x|)² = 1 (A.I.)

[kallura-icedcoffee]

mischief managed, ch 1

A/N: I recently watched Mary and the Witch’s Flower and ***SPOILERS*** I was super intrigued by the initial premise of getting accepted to a school for witches when you’re not actually a witch and watching Mary trying to lie her way out of it. I wish they had done more with this in the film, but they didn’t so my desire to see this played out more, and it being spooky season, and me always being on my Kallura AU bullshit well…here we are :D (and yes I realize I’m doing the most by starting a multi chapter fic in the middle of Kallura Month. I’m incorrigible.)

Also many thanks again to @juniberrie for this piece I commissioned and they were kind enough to do in relation to this story. I love it so much!!!

Rating: Teen and up

Relationship: Kallura

Summary: The second that high school diploma is placed in his hands, Keith can’t wait to get the hell out the small podunk Texas town he grew up in. As much as he wants to go where the wind takes him his mom INSISTS on college. Fine. He’ll just apply to every out-of-state school he’s ever heard of and some he hasn’t. When one of those schools he’s never heard of offers him a full ride he quickly agrees without even looking at the brochure. He probably should’ve looked at the brochure…

Preview:

He opened his eyes to see a rather pretty petite young lady in a sort of stewardess outfit in dark violet color. He sat up and looked around. The other girl was gone and so were her things. He hurriedly grabbed his bags and followed the attendant out of the cabin. Other students were quickly filling past him to disembark and it was then that Keith started to get an odd sinking feeling.

More witch hats, a lot more. It seemed almost every other person was wearing one. Then a boy almost bumped into him with a rather large frog perched on his shoulder. It croaked loudly at Keith during the collision and made him jump.

“What the fuck?” Keith whispered to himself as he followed the crowd off the train.

Other than a small building off to the side the station was outdoors and as he stepped into the cool fall air his heart seized.  Something was very wrong.

“Freshman class! If you are part of the freshman class over here please!” A voice bellowed through a megaphone. When lowered, it revealed a handsome older classman with stark white hair and a prominent scar over his nose. He wore a long black cloak over a dark violet collegiate sweatshirt with “MARMORA” across the chest and jeans. There was a falcon on his shoulder and a broomstick in his other hand.

People began to gather around him and Keith, not knowing where else to go, joined them. The white haired gentleman continued to try and rally the crowd with more announcements but everyone was chatting and he couldn’t seem to get anyone’s attention. In frustration he finally tucked the broom between his legs and moments later he lifted off the ground until he was over everyone’s heads.

“Holy shit!” Keith blurted out loudly.

The entire group turned to him in unison, including the man on the broom who looked at him suspiciously.

“Uh…what I meant was holy shit that is a nice lookin broom!” Keith gave him a thumbs up.

He thought perhaps now was not the time to out himself so publicly, but internally he was freaking the fuck out.

CLICK HERE TO READ MORE ON AO3

[cromulentbookreview]

Menstruation!

Yes, that’s right, menstruation! Something half the world’s population experiences on a monthly basis - the regular discharge of blood and mucosal tissue from inner uterine lining through the vagina and...are all the dudes gone? 

Sweet. 

Let’s talk about Mackenzi Lee’s fiercely feminist follow-up to The Gentleman’s Guide to Vice and Virtue: The Lady’s Guide to Petticoats and Piracy!

“You’re trying to play a game designed by men. You’ll never win, because the deck is stacked and marked, and also you’ve been blindfolded and set on fire. You can work hard and believe in yourself and be the smartest person in the room and you’ll still get beat by the boys who haven’t two cents to rub together.” - From the ARC of The Lady’s Guide to Petticoats and Piracy

For some reason, I have a terrible time writing about things I really, really like. I can go on and on about that one thing that I hate (and I do, often), but when I like something, I say “hey, I like that” and then not much else. My eloquence deserts me when I have to articulate why it is I love something beyond “aw man it’s the best” and then nothing else. Not sure why that is. What I do know is that I finished reading The Lady’s Guide to Petticoats and Piracy on August 28th, actually, it was August 1. I know how dates work. I started writing a review as soon as I finished it, then just...didn’t. Perhaps it’s pure laziness. Perhaps its writer’s block. Perhaps it’s because I’m in the middle of another epic book binge (five books in, four to go, plus a novella and possibly an ARC of book 10!). 

Whatever the reason, I’ve come back to this review over and over, determined to be clever and such, but...man it’s just harder to write about things you love versus the things you hate. It’s very easy to criticize (fun, too), but writing endless praise gets boring fast.

So how am I supposed to describe how much I love Mackenzi Lee’s books?

Mackenzi Lee’s works are the book equivalent of a warm, comforting hug. A hug delivered directly to your brain, with words. The Gentleman’s Guide to Vice and Virtue was one of the best books I read last year, and its sequel does not disappoint in the slightest. Lady’s Guide is 100% pure feminist awesomeness. If you’ve ever been angered by the patriarchy, then this book is definitely for you.

Since praise is hard and complaining is fun, let me take a moment to complain.

All girls, all women, really, know how it is to feel “less-than” for simply being female. That shit starts the minute we’re born and it’s pervasive as fuck. It never stops. Even in a world where a family cannot survive on just one income, women are expected to work two jobs: one for pay, and one for free. Women are described not as people, but as extensions of others: “Wife”, “Mother”, “Girlfriend”, “Daughter” - as if that is all we are, and all we’re expected to be. (On a related note, I am so tired of books with titles that end with “wife”, “daughter”, “sister,” etc. Also, describing women as “girls.” Fuck that shit, I’m an adult, don’t you call me “girl.”). All the bad things that happen to women are our own fault somehow. Rather than teaching men not to attack women, women are expected to take every single precaution in the universe to protect themselves from men. A single “lapse”? Well, then, anything that a man does to you is your fault. Ladies, have you ever had to fake a hypothetical male partner in order to avoid being harassed? Because men would automatically respect a non-existent male before a real human female?

I am so fucking tired of all of that shit. I am so tired of women being blamed for every single bad thing that happens to them. I am so tired of men getting away with harassing, demeaning and belittling women. I am so tired of male authors saying shit like “Mary Shelley didn’t really write Frankenstein!” I am so tired of women’s accomplishments being treated as “less-than.” I am so tired of a woman’s value being equated with whether or not she has a husband or children. I am so tired of a woman’s worth being equated with her appearance. I am tired of being paid less for the same work my male coworkers do. I am so tired of job interviews with loaded questions meant to suss out whether or not you’re planning on taking maternity leave (because it’s illegal to ask if someone is planning on having kids, but perfectly OK to ask “what are your future plans?” wink wink). I am so tired of all of it. It’s bullshit. All of it is bullshit, and the fact that being a woman means fighting an uphill battle every goddamn day just makes me tired.

And all I’ve described above is just a fraction of the bullshit women of color experience. It’s the fucking worst.

This is why we need books like Lady’s Guide. The patriarchy might not be as visible or obviously terrible as it was in the 18th century, but it’s still here, and still as toxic as ever. 

Ahem. Anyway. Ladies Guide! See, I can complain forever. When it comes to things I love I’m like “uh, I love it, you should read it” and that’s it.

Lady’s Guide takes place roughly a year after the end of Gentleman’s Guide - Felicity is living and working in a bakery in Edinburgh. She’s been trying, and mostly failing, to get accepted into medical school. But, this being the 18th century, and Felicity being a woman, she doesn’t get very far. After her coworker at the bakery proposes to her, dismissing Felicity’s desires for an education as nothing more than a phase, Felicity decides to take off and try again in London. She sets up shop with her brother and Percy, living happily ever after (because Monty/Percy forever, goddamn it!) and attempts to get into one of the London medical schools via subterfuge. Unfortunately, it doesn’t work out. Felicity is on the verge of giving up when one of the hospital’s more enlightened board members gives her the contact info for Alexander Platt - a trailblazer in the medical field and Felicity’s idol. Dr. Platt might just take a woman on as a student, but he’s all the way in Stuttgart...

...about to get married to Felicity’s childhood best friend, Johanna Hoffmann. Sounds like a perfect way for Felicity to ingratiate herself with Dr. Platt, right?

Except Johanna and Felicity had a falling out years ago. As kids, Felicity and Johanna loved exploring and science and getting dirty, but, as they got older, Johanna started showing more interest in “girly” things while Felicity’s interests never strayed. Nothing like that painful phase of adolescence where you look around and see that all your friends have changed, gotten into boys and makeup and all that shit, while all you want to do is read Tolkien and watch Sailor Moon...

Such a classic episode. 

Anyway, Felicity decides to say “fuck it,” and head off to see Johanna in Stuttgart anyway, because this is her chance and she’s not going to throw away her shot.* So Felicity teams up with Sim, a friend of the pirates from Gentleman’s Guide, ditches Monty and Percy and heads off for the continent. 

And if reuniting with an ex-best friend who you haven’t spoken to or seen in years isn’t awkward enough, meeting your hero, who is about to get married to said ex-best friend, is even worse. Like all heroes, Dr. Platt isn’t exactly everything Felicity thought he would be. And his upcoming marriage to Johanna isn’t exactly a love match on either side...

Lady’s Guide is not only a massive brain-hug, it’s existence-affirming. Felicity writes herself a message, one she returns to time and time again throughout the book, and something all women and girls  should hear: You Deserve To Be Here. Yes. Yes you fucking do. Felicity deserves to attend medical school - but men block her path. She deserves to be her own woman, an intellectual, a scientist - all of that, without being scoffed at. 

Lee also makes the point, throughout the book, that the patriarchy is not just men. Women perpetuate patriarchy as well by bullying and policing the behavior of other women. We’re kept down by our own infighting. We see this in the relationship between Felicity and Johanna, whose friendship fell apart because of their differing views on femininity. Felicity was keen to reject feminine trappings, like clothes, makeup, boys, etc., focusing instead on her books. Johanna wanted to embrace her femininity and be a scientist. Felicity looked down her nose at Johanna’s embrace of the traditionally feminine, and Johanna resented Felicity’s high-and-mighty-better-than-you attitude, and thus their childhood friendship fell apart.

The relationship between Johanna and Felicity and their views on femininity is very much like Sansa and Arya Stark. On the Sansa-Arya spectrum, Arya is all about rejecting traditional femininity - no frilly dresses or talk of marriage for Arya. No, she’s all about sword-fighting and vengeance and wearing other people’s faces as masks. Sansa, on the other end of the spectrum, embraces traditional Westerosi femininity, at first suffering it’s trappings, but then she learns to embrace it in another way. Sansa learns to wear her femininity like armor, and use it to her advantage. First, she uses it to survive in King’s Landing, where one wrong move would have gotten her killed, then she uses it to get the same thing Arya hopes to get with her assassin skills: vengeance. Independently, Sansa and Arya are both powerful women. Together? Aw, man. Shit’s going to go down.

I do have one nitpicky complaint, re: Lady’s Guide.

At one point, Johanna tells Sim: “I will drag you back to Bavaria by the ear and take you to court there if I must.”

OK, so in the novel, Johanna lives in Stuttgart. Stuttgart is in Baden-Württemberg, though so...why is Johanna threatening to drag Sim to Bavaria? In the early 1700s, Stuttgart was part of the Duchy of Württemberg which was definitely not in Bavaria. I’m not sure how the Swabians would take it if they were mistaken for Bavarians. Or vice-versa. And heaven forbid you mix up Bavaria and Franconia, even though Franconia is technically now a part of Bavaria…

Ok. Here’s the thing, though. Germany, as it is today didn’t exist until the 90s. The 1990s. Until then the 99.999999% of German history is trying to figure out the goddamned map. There was no unified “Germany” until 1871, and even then the borders didn’t mesh with what they are today. The area that we refer to as “Germany” historically was about 100,000,000 little Kingdoms/Grand Duchies/Duchies/Electorates/Principalities/city-states/what-have-yous tangled together by the Holy Roman Empire, until Napoleon kicked the Holy Roman Empire’s ass in 1805, leading to Francis II to dissolve the Empire in 1806 then it was the German Confederation with the same amount of Kingdoms/Grand Duchies/Duchies/Electorates/Principalities/city-states/what-have-yous … Jesus, just look at the maps. I mean, look at  Baden-Württemberg in the 18th century alone! 

I honestly don’t know how actual Germans sort this out. It’s easier to just be like “OK, we’re just going to start at 1871 and go forward, OK? Let’s just call everything that came before Germany and move on.”

Still, if you’re from Stuttgart and you show up in Bavaria to file a complaint, you’d probably get laughed at by a bunch of mustachioed dudes who’ve been drinking since 9 AM.  

But really, that is my only complaint. Read The Lady’s Guide to Petticoats and Piracy. If you pre-order it, you can get a bonus ebook epilogue to Gentleman’s Guide!  So...go do that. 

RECOMMENDED FOR: Everyone, women especially.

NOT RECOMMENDED FOR: Assholes, men’s right’s activists.

RATING: 5/5

TOTALLY UNBIASED FANGIRL RATING: 5,000,000,000,000,000/5

RELEASE DATE: October 2, 2018

ANTICIPATION LEVEL FOR SEQUEL/CONTINUATIONS: Olympus Mons

AMOUNT OF TIME IT TOOK ME TO WRITE THIS RIDICULOUS REVIEW: 21 days.  Hahaha, no it took me 48 days. Because...fuck...I don’t know.

* (curse you, Lin-Manuel Miranda!)

[sassycassie-s-writing]

Mutate

By: SassyShoulderAngel319

Fandom/Character(s): Avengers + X-Men - Peter Parker/Spider-Man, Tony Stark/Iron Man + Charles Xavier/Professor X

Rating: PG

Original Idea: I was cleaning my grampa’s house while my imagination was off in La La Land (not the movie, I mean daydreaming) and this just kind of appeared.

Notes: (Masterlist)(By Character)(About Me) HUGE thanks to the NerdSync YouTube channel for informing me on the difference (in the Marvel world) between a mutant and a mutate. (Also this one is LOOOONG!)

^^^^^

“Knock-knock,” a British voice piped up from the doorway. I turned around, setting the duster down. I’d been dusting under the gazillion knick-knacks in the X-Mansion as one of my chores.

“Hey Professor,” I greeted.

“Good morning Miss Marble. May I have a word with you?”

“Of course.”

There was a brief pause. “Alone?” Professor Xavier pressed.

I glanced around at the empty parlor. “… We are alone,” I pointed out, confused.

“Yes. But I mean, downstairs.”

Realization dawned. My face went slack. “Oh. Oh!”

Downstairs. Under the mansion—in the X-Men base. While I’d been attending the Academy as a student, rather than a part-time teacher, Professor X asking the teachers to meet him downstairs ASAP meant that official X-Men business was happening.

I followed him down into the rounded corridors, looking around in awe. I’d been teaching since I was eighteen—so three years ago—and yet had only been downstairs once before. And I’d been unconscious in the infirmary for most of it so I didn’t really remember it well.

“So what’s going on? I assume I’m not graduating the Academy again and not becoming an official X-Man—or Woman, whatever,” I asked.

Professor Xavier’s wheelchair stopped. “Do you remember the saliva sample you gave me and Hank the other week?”

“Yeah.”

“We ran your genetic code,” he informed me. “And the results might… improve your life.”

“How so?”

“Well, with no sugarcoating: you’re not a mutant.”

I blinked in surprise. “Wh-what?” I stammered. “Not—not a mutant? How?”

“There is no trace of the X-gene in your DNA. You were not born with your powers. You are what’s known as a mutate, not a mutant,” Professor Xavier explained. “Now the outside world has no reason to hate you as they do most mutants. I don’t know how you got your powers, young one, but you weren’t born with them. Your powers lie somewhere else in your DNA and that’s what makes you different and special.”

As he spoke, I backed up, my hand feeling behind me. There was no chair in the corridors to sit in so I hit the wall with my back and slid down it, landing heavily on the floor. I stared into the middle distance blankly. “Not a mutant,” I whispered.

“No. Some other part of your genetic code was mutated to give you your powers. We’re not sure what, but it’s not the mutant gene.”

“What do I—what do I—what do I do?” I stammered again, trying to gain my thoughts. “I can’t stay here. I don’t belong. Once the kids find out I’m not actually one of them there’s no way they’ll accept me. I… I have to leave. But I have nowhere else to go. I’ve known nothing but this school since I was ten-years-old.” I was rambling, thinking out loud with no direction.

“You don’t have to go,” Professor Xavier remarked. “You’re always welcome here.”

“No. No. This isn’t the place for me. This is a safe zone for mutants. And I’m not one. I need to leave. I’ll finish out the semester but once summer hits I need to find something else. I can’t… I can’t be here. The kids despise mutates—they’re celebrated for the same powers mutants are hated for.”

“That’s not true. They don’t despise mutates.”

“You don’t hear them talk after-hours.”

“No, but I do hear them think. People’s minds are a lot more honest than their mouths.” He sighed. “I knew you’d react like this, young lady. So I’ve already placed a call to a facility upstate. The manager is a friend of mine. I told him about the situation and he said he’d be happy to accept you into his operation. You’d be safe to stay there.”

“A facility upstate? What random manager would let a random, superpowered twenty-one-year-old into whatever it is they do there? Who is he?”

Professor X smiled. “His name is Tony Stark,” he replied.

My mouth dropped open. “Iron Man?” I breathed in awe.

“Yes. He agreed to take you in and let you train as an Avenger. He expects you at the semester’s end.”

I slouched against the rounded wall with a sigh. “An Avenger… wow. Uh… okay. Thank you, Professor.”

^^^^^

I rang the gate’s intercom. There was a twenty-foot wall around the entire compound.

There was a loud buzz—that made me jump—and the gates opened.

Chewing the inside of my cheek, I scooped up my suitcase and strolled up the path. Logan honked the horn of the car and waved at me before driving away. I waved back as the gate closed, shutting me in and the world out.

When I made it to the front door, I pressed the doorbell. The front door was glass—in fact, almost everything was glass. I’d never seen an exterior with so many windows before—except that one time I went to New York City with Ororo when I was like seventeen as something of a field trip with a couple other students.

A young man about my age was strolling by with a half-eaten donut in one hand. He came over and opened the door. His hair was curly and brown, as were his eyes—without the curly bit.

The young man looked me up and down, taking a bite out of his donut. I returned the gesture, sweeping him with my eyes. He had on a T-shirt that had the Periodic Table of the Elements on it and a font that looked like handwriting across the chest reading, How often do I wear this shirt? Periodically. I couldn’t help but snort slightly.

He looked over his shoulder to shout into the building with his mouth full, “Tony! There’s a really cute girl at the door. Are we expecting her or do I need to kick her out?!” His tone was joking but also curious.

I turned bright red. A really cute girl? How flattering.

Another figure appeared in the doorway. A bit taller than the first and a lot older. He gave me a wide smile. “You must be Miss Marble—the mutate who didn’t belong,” he greeted, extending a hand. I took it and shook it.

“That’s me,” I replied.

“I’m Tony. This is Peter. Excuse his social skills,” Tony remarked, sort of kidding.

I shook Peter’s hand when Tony passed my hand to Peter’s. “Charmed,” I offered.

“Mutual,” Peter agreed.

Tony clapped his hands once and rubbed them together. “Well, kids, normally I’d give the newbie the grand tour, but Peter, I think you’re her age so I’m going to let you do it instead.” He gave me a toothy smile and strolled into the building. I watched him disappear with arched eyebrows. Peter’s cheeks were slightly pink when he looked back at me.

He cleared his throat. “He’s, uh… a bit eccentric,” he commented.

“Really? I couldn’t tell,” I retorted sarcastically.

“Here. Let me get your bag. I’ll, uh, show you to your room.”

“I can get it. I’m a strong girl.”

“Well I understand that, but see, I’m trying to be a gentleman and make a good first impression. It’s not every day a pretty girl turns up at the door.” He smiled cheekily. “How old are you, anyway? Tony’s not the best judge of age.”

“I’m twenty-one.”

Peter arched his eyebrows. “Really? Wow. We are the same age. Okay then.” He took my bag handle from my grip and gestured for me to come into the facility. I crossed the threshold.

Nothing would ever be the same again. I wasn’t a mutant. I could become an Avenger.

The facility was high-tech, with the Avengers logo emblazoned on everything. Well, almost. It felt like it was. I followed Peter up some stairs and down a couple corridors to a long hallway with lots of doors. “This is the main living area with all the rooms. At the end of the hall is the huge common area—there are about a dozen couches with various activities and stuff and a kitchen nearby. Downstairs is the lap pool, the screening room—which is Tony’s phrase for ‘home theater’—also the gym and a couple other things. I’ll show you those when we get there. But for now… your room. Pretty sure it’s the one next to mine since Tony recently had it renovated,” he explained.

“Oooookay,” I agreed, not entirely following everything he said.

“But it’s the one on the opposite side of mine from Vision’s. Be careful with him—he’s not too big on doors or walls. He can and will probably walk in on you straight through the wall in any kind of awkward situation. Like, I ended up upside down in a tangle of webs after trying to fix a malfunction in my web-shooter and he strolled right in, not even realizing anything was abnormal. Though, to be fair to him, when you live in a building full of superpowered people, nothing really is abnormal. The crazy is the usual.”

“So, then, you’re Spider-Man,” I stated.

He swore under his breath and then sighed. “Welp. Guess you would’ve found out sooner or later… Yeah. Yeah I am,” he admitted. He took me down the hallway and into a room.

The bedroom was, if possible, even nicer than the one I occupied as a teacher at the X-Mansion. It was more modern, to be sure, but it was bigger and the bed looked so comfortable it made me sleepy just to look at it.

I smiled at Peter as he set my bag down in front of the closet. “This is really nice,” I decided.

“Glad you think so, Miss Marble,” a disembodied Irish lady’s voice agreed from nowhere. I jumped and looked around frantically.

Peter chuckled. “That’s just FRIDAY. She’s Tony’s natural-language-user-interface. A voice-command computer program. Kinda like Siri—if Siri ever actually functioned properly. She runs through the whole facility. Makes everything a lot easier—though, sometimes a little scary when you’re not expecting her,” he explained.

I nodded. “Okay,” I muttered. I lifted my voice. “Hi there, FRIDAY.”

“Hello Miss Marble. A pleasure to have you with us. I look forward to working with you.”

“Uh… thanks.”

“You’re very welcome.”

Peter smiled. “Well, I guess I’ll let you get settled in. If you need anything, feel free to let me know. FRIDAY can send me a message or find me so you can talk face-to-face. Whatever’s comfortable for you. It’s nice to have someone my age around here. Won’t make me feel like the others baby me.”

I snickered. “Well, I look forward to getting to know you better,” I offered.

Peter blushed. “You too.” He slipped out my door—and then quickly returned. “Hey, so, when you’re done unpacking, let me know and I’ll come get you and take you on a tour.”

“Sounds good.”

“And, uh, maybe I could take you out to lunch somewhere? There’s a nice local diner in the nearby town that we all like. I’m sure you’re tired from travelling but food lifts everyone’s spirits. If you don’t want to, it’s okay. I know we just met but I’d really like to get to know you if you’re going to be here for a while and it doesn’t have to be a date—” He spoke so quickly I almost didn’t understand what he was saying, but I laughed and cut him off.

“Peter. It’s fine. I’d love to join you. Best to get to know people right off the bat, right?”

He flushed red. “A-absolutely!” he exclaimed with a bit of a stutter of nerves. “Um… right. Call me when you want the tour.”

I grinned. “I will.”

He ducked out of my room again. I chuckled and fell onto the bed. He was right about many things, but in particular, that I was tired from travelling. Even just the drive upstate made me want to take a nap.

But I had work to do. I had to become an Avenger. And I couldn’t do that if I didn’t unpack and meet the other Avengers.

I got off the bed, set my hands on my hips, and set to work.