#taika waititi changed my life okay

[vaultedthewall]

Chronicles of Amber Fancast

Prefacing this with what I actually want from a Chronicles of Amber series is that tweet about not actually wanting an all star cast but ten unknowns and a scriptwriter that is deeply unwell. But if I'm gonna pick and choose big name actors here is who I would like based mostly on vibes, attractiveness (to me), and the likelihood it would really upset certain subreddits. AKA everything important in life. Mainly just the children of Oberon in the first five books bc it's already long enough as is.

Corwin - Oscar Isaac

Charismatic enough to make me forget how much I fucking hate Corwin, also he can sing. Thanks to Moon Knight we know he can totally rock "Protag who is just as confused as the audience as to what is going on" which is v important for Nine Princes In Amber.

Benedict - Idris Elba

Tall, 100% Done With This Family's shit, can carry the vibes of someone who only doesn't have the throne because he doesn't want it and everyone agrees if that was different he'd just have it.

Eric - Taika Waititi

Can balance both absolute piece of trash bag of dicks while still being charismatic which is really what's important about Eric.

Deirdre - Kali Reis

You want a battle maiden you'll get a battle maiden. If anything the main problem here is there's no way on god's green earth you could convince me she'd need Corwin and/or Random to come to her rescue for anything, but hey adaptations are for changing things.

Fiona - Sophie Turner

For all the redheads I thought it'd be important to pick people who normally play affable everymen/heroes/people you're used to seeing as goodguys, even if the nature of adapting a book series that's older than most of the people you'd cast in it means the 'big twist' of who the traitors are is something everyone sees coming. So someone well practiced at ingenues would be perfect for the actual baddest bitch in charge.

Bleys - K. J. Apa

We're gonna give him a better dye job than Riverdale though okay I promise.

Brand - Jack Quaid

Absolutely 'just this guy you know' vibes. Easy to overlook. Would YOU believe he was the big bad? Come on.

Llewella - Halle Bailey

Yes I'm making a Little Mermaid joke, try and stop me. But also given how shafted she was in the books I think it's important to use someone who can do a lot with having few speaking lines (though hopefully again that would be fixed in an adaptation)

Caine - Vico Ortiz

Literally I just want to watch them doing all the scenery chewing bullshit you know Caine has to get up to while they are manipulating and spycrafting their way through shit. Can fully believe they'd pull a finding a copy of themself to kill and leave so people don't know they're still around behind the scenes. Especially in their Blackbeard fit, come on.

Julian - Conrad Ricamora

Did I just cast my absolute most favorite Mister Darcy as my number one blorbo Julian? Call the fucking cops on me idgaf. His resting bitch face and sarcasm are second to none. Also watch Fire Island (2022) on Hulu.

Gérard - Jason Momoa

Along with being the biggest canon kinda implies he's also the hottest of all of Oberon's sons so absolute massive dreamboat Jason Momoa it is. Also for the lolz of him and Vico being the navy people.

Florimel - Jamie Clayton

Did you ever see a woman so beautiful you started crying?

Random - Bex Taylor-Klaus

They can absolutely go through the journey of youngest sibling in the jester position/fuckup because who cares > most responsible one after all.

BONUS

Bill Roth - Wil Wheaton

Look I adore his narration of the last five Amber books!!! I want him somewhere so the reliable chillax lawyer from earth who somehow just rolls with becoming the family lawyer for what amounts to gods of reality. I know I said I actually want a bunch of unknowns for the actual series but I will cry at whoever I must to make this happen. Please.

[fallenrocket]

#HuntForThePirateHome Watch Party

(crossposted from my twitter)

Hunt for the Wilderpeople reflects a common theme in Taika Waititi's work, and in OFMD, about people's perceived worth/capabilities. It's easy to look at someone from the outside and call them a "bad egg" or an idiot/failure.

But with love, affirmation, and understanding, people are so much more than that. It's funny when Paula sums up all of Ricky's delinquency, but it's also so sad that she's pre-decided his kid's entire future, boxing him in before he's even started.

***

I'd forgotten that Oscar Kightley was in this. He was one of my favorite parts of Next Goal Wins!

***

In a weird way, Bella is a bit like Stede after his reunion with Ed. She's thrilled to have Ricky there and eager to lavish him with everything he could want, but she's also cognizant of what he's been through and trying to respect his space.

***

"I'm so happy we found you, buddy. I'm sorry it took so long." 🥹

***

"He's tricky like that, Jesus"--lol, I love it.

***

Taika is so good at setting up little visual things that pay off later in the film, creating a great narrative moment without any dialogue. It's such a gut punch when Ricky pulls back his blankets and the hot water bottle isn't there.

***

I love this movie. Every element is just wonderfully executed. The acting, dialogue, camera work, music choices, even the chapter titles--they all serve to enhance the story the film is telling.

***

"Do you want me to go find help? ...I'd die, wouldn't I?"

Julian Dennison is so great as Ricky. Taika's gift for casting/directing kids is impeccable, he never misses.

***

The most heartbreaking thing about Ricky's story about Amber is that we the audience (and Hec) understand what really happened better than he does. Brilliant scene, gaahhhh!

***

"'Faulkner is Cauc... Caucasian.' Well they got that wrong, 'cause you're obviously white." Love that line!

***

I love Ricky's "he made me do stuff" monologue. It's common to have one character innocently say something that sounds completely wrong to another character, but it's rarely done with such finesse. Nothing Ricky says sounds forced for the sake of the joke.

***

I like Ricky and Hec's conversation about "majestical" vs. "majestic." I relate to that feeling of knowing a word isn't "proper" but using it anyway because it feels closer to what I want to say than the real word.

***

@netflix is a great platform for Hunt for the Wilderpeople. It would pair wonderfully with Our Flag Means Death, another hilarious, heartfelt story with a unique vision whose amazing cast features some talented Polynesian actors! Won't you #AdoptOurCrew?

***

"She wanted to save us poor wretches when no one else wanted us, like rescue dogs"

This is a line that could easily be uncomfortable and patronizing. But we've met Bella, so we know that this is true in the sincerest way possible.

***

Paula is a subtle Miss Trunchbull, change my mind.

***

Oh god, poor Zag--you were a good dog. 😢

***

"I was trying to tell you it was like The Lord of the Rings!"

Ricky Baker has never done a single thing wrong in his life, your honor.

***

"Don't even get me started on the national rugby team! They're not human."

Psycho Sam has entered the chat!

***

Okay, so Frenchie would absolutely believe the same conspiracies as Psycho Sam, but he'd also be like, "Take it easy, man, alright?"

***

It's hard for me to pin down my favorite Taika film, but I think Hunt for the Wilderpeople is his quintessential film. While his onscreen role is small, it's like concentrated Taika Waititi, and it's the one I'd use to introduce people to his work.

***

@netflix, Hunt for the Wilderpeople is about finding a place to belong after you've been rejected

Our Flag Means Death, which is also about belonging, was rejected by its former streamer

You could #AdoptOurCrew and give this diverse, critically-acclaimed show a new home!

[freeuselandonorris]

✨💌

(for the writer asks here!)

✨What's a fic you've posted you wish you could breathe life into again and have people talking about it? (or simply a fic you wish got more credit)

hmmm. a lot of my fics are either for very niche pairings, niche fandoms or niche kinks, so I’m kind of used to posting into the void to an extent 😅

that said, two fics I’m particularly proud of that didn’t get huge traction are:

all the blood runs hot before it’s cold (F1 RPF, toto wolff/christian horner, christian horner/geri halliwell, E). look, i get it. it’s a weird fic about two very rich and quite obnoxious middle aged men being vile to each other, and one of them gets pegged by a spice girl. it’s not for everyone. but I love what I managed to do with that fic and I think it’s the one I’m proudest of overall in terms of showing off my actual writing ability.

crosstown traffic (our flag means death RPF, taika waititi/rhys darby, E). this one actually did okay for the bounds of a tiny fandom, given it was posted between seasons. but again, I feel like I did a decent job of making this a character study of LA Taika (as opposed to Aotearoa NZ Taika, a very different beast). I’ve actually been thinking about doing a sequel to this at some point, set during the filming of Flag S2, where I look at Aotearoa Taika in more depth, like a mirror image piece somehow.

I guess I haven’t entirely answered the question directly here but yeah, I think they’re the two I would be happiest for people to revisit!

💌share something with us about an up-and-coming work (WIP) that has you excited!

oh god I have like…five WIPs on the go currently because I have poor impulse control.

so I’ve been working on a sequel to the toto/christian fic I mentioned above, set from toto’s POV this time (one of my favourite POVs to write from).

“You know,” Toto says. “I read this book over the winter break.”

“Oh dear,” Christian looks pained.

There’s something different about him today. In the intervening period since Toto was last alone with him, something has changed. He’s taking up the whole cradle of the armchair like he thinks he belongs there.

“It was about Mithridates,” Toto continues, ignoring Christian. “He was the ruler of Pontus in Anatolia in the first century BC. His father was assassinated at a banquet, and so Mithridates spent seven years in the wilderness, ingesting poisons at sub-lethal doses.”

“Right,” Christian says impatiently. “Why, exactly?” His fingers twitch against his thighs.

Toto leans back against the desk, legs stretched out and crossed at the ankles. The sharp edge cuts into his glutes. He flexes, letting the discomfort translate itself into another stirring of blood.

“He built up an immunity,” he says, and leans forward. His cock throbs with every beat of his heart. “Eventually, these repeated small exposures to the deadliest of poisons accumulated in his system. It no longer affected him.”

I also started writing girl!Lando/Oscar filth yesterday whoops

“Hey, Osc.” Lando drops her phone to her chest and fixes Oscar with a scrutinising gaze. She’s been sprawled on Oscar’s sofa for the past hour, feet up on his coffee table, gnawing on the beads of her bracelets and largely ignoring him. “You ever made a girl squirt?”

Jesus. Oscar should be used to this kind of thing by now, really, but it never stops startling him when Lando pipes up have you ever done spanking or did you know that you can train yourself out of a gag reflex if you like, really commit apropos of nothing.

“Uh,” Oscar says. “Nope. Can’t say I have. Have you?”

and wonderful OP I realise you might be glazed over now while I talk about motorsports fics when you followed me for Flag stuff! but the other day I remembered I got halfway through a Roach/Blackbeard cannibalism fantasy (look, it’s canon, alright) fic that I abandoned a few months ago. I’d like to go back to it at some point, though!

“They say you’ve tasted human flesh,” he says. The words are astonishing coming out of his mouth. He keeps his voice deliberately low, his words audible only to Blackbeard before the breeze and the waves wash them away.

“Do they, now,” Edward says, musing. He’s still smiling, but it’s changed now. He’s eyeing Roach speculatively; Roach feels pinned, like something to be inspected under glass. He forces himself to look up at meet Edward’s gaze, more boldly than he feels inside.

Edward leans a little closer, voice low. “Yeah, I’ve tasted flesh.”

Roach can’t stop the way his eyelids flutter, hearing it. He sucks in a breath. “You have?”

“Oh, yeah,” Blackbeard says, and tilts his head. “A man can work up all sorts of appetites under the right circumstances.”

thanks for asking! 💕

[ghost-in-the-corner]

Okay so assorted thoughts on Thor: Love and Thunder because the person I saw it with doesn't want to hear it lmao

Right out of the gate: that little girl is Galactus. She is the wish from Eternity, and its original form was his silhouette. Change my mind.

Also way to see Thor adopt a kid. His character growth throughout the entire MCU is probably my favourite arc. We see him start as a child, and now he has one

When do we get to see Loki be a weird uncle

The colour and lighting was absolutely gorgeous, I'm immediately seeing technical awards in the future

You can always rely on Taika Waititi to give us the gay content we're looking for

Dwayne x Korg is the best thing to come out of this movie

While I'm sad about it, I think Jane's role in this movie was fitting. Not just as a plot device for Thor, but as her own character. She did everything she could for Earth, and she did not want to go down without a fight. (Though I think a little more could've been done for her agency-wise)

They should've had Thor call Jane Mighty Thor first, not Valkyrie

Also wanted to see more Valkyrie and Jane being besties

I'm a slut for everything Russel Crowe is in, I love him so much

But yeah he did a great job as Zeus because Zeus is a freaking monster

The rep for all of the gods in Omnipotent City was amazing

I worship Bao now

I probably would've gotten really emotional at the end if I weren't freaking out over Galactus

"Everywhere they go, they're known as Love and Thunder," awwwwww

The story was very well done, probably the most satisfying one post-Endgame (with a possible exception of No Way Home)

Prolonged Butt

I can't wait for all the fanfiction for this

Give me more Darcy

And more ABBA

The Darryl cameo gave me life

I love that they glossed over the Warriors Three, but have established that Sif is a major player in New Asgard

This did a lot of world building for Asgard despite them being on Earth, I feel like I understand their society better

All in all, this film was very explicitly reinventing Thor for upcoming stories, leaving everything from his past (i.e. Jane) behind and giving him newer parts (i.e. Axel) without unceremoniously throwing it all away

The character growth of Thor is stunning, I'm excited to see where he goes next

I had fun, but not necessarily as much as Ragnarok

Mmmmmm 7.5/10 movie, four for you Taika, you go Taika

Also why the fuck did Chris Pratt need a personal hair stylist AND make up artist for 10 minutes of screen time, I don't think the other Guardians did though I could be wrong as I only skimmed the credits

[endless-oc-creations]

🎶 Guess who’s getting used for the free space on my OC Bingo Card? 🎶

These questions are all about your lovely poly pirate Ace, because I love him dearly and I want to know everything possible about him ♡♡♡.

What song would you consider to be his “theme song”?

Is Ace his real name? If not, how did he come up with it as a moniker?

What is Ed’s favorite thing about him, and what is Stede’s?

If he lived in modern times, what kind of music would he like to listen to?

What would be the title of his autobiography?

Can’t wait to see your answers, and I hope you’re doing well!! 🧚🏻‍♂️✨

*sobs* You're a doll!! I really gotta get his intro post going at some point cause he's one of my precious boys! 😭 

What song would you consider to be his “theme song”?

Answer: Constellations by The Oh Hellos

2. Is Ace his real name? If not, how did he come up with it as a moniker?

Answer: Okay this gonna be way more detailed than needed, but I don't talk about Ace much...at all really. And I never really explained his backstory~ You also love him a lot so here it is!

---

Ace Cooper is not his real name. It's his most recent one. His last name used to be known as the pirate Captain Bartholomew Roberts aka the “Black Bart.”

Side note: I really hope Taika Waititi doesn't create a character based on Bartholomew Roberts's character for season 2 cause then I would have to obviously change things around for Ace. 💀

I wanted to use Ace as an inspiration from the real-life pirate Bartholomew because of how his crew thought of him and his story.

"Roberts was wildly admired by his crew for his adventurist courage, navigation skills, and bravado.  He captured over 400 ships during his reign, and died in a vigorous battle against a British vessel."

Ace's original name was Jonathan Roberts. Since he was a boy 'Johnathan' or John for short had been prepared to serve England by joining the Navy. When he finally set sail, the ship he was on was captured by a pirate by the name of Howell Davis.

Young John was forced to join his crew and not wanting to die, he complied. But quickly learned that a pirate's life really was the life for him. He never felt happier.

So it was official, Jonathan Roberts was dead and Bartholomew Roberts was born.

'Roberts' knew his place on the crew, getting along with the other members, and quickly became the Captain's favorite.

'Roberts' was a favored apprentice of Captain Davis, the two even going as far as to almost have a romantic relationship with each other

He enjoyed Davis's quick wit and tricks on their journey because after all Davis was known to be The pirate of disguise and trickery.

But that happiness was short-lived because Davis was eventually been tricked himself and there was an ambush. During this ambush, Davis had been shot five times by Portuguese soldiers and died.

Roberts ended up escaping with the remaining crew members from the ambush. The crew quickly elected Roberts to serve as their new captain.

In his rage and grief at the death of Davis, Roberts's first order of business so to speak was avenging Davis's death. He and his crew did just that.

The town they tricked and caused their beloved Captain's death was burned and totally demolished.

After that 'Roberts' and his crew plundered many ships, including warships, until being stopped a few years later.

As the crew was anchored, celebrating their recent plunder, the British Navy attacked them, and in the battle 'Roberts' was shot, falling into the sea to his supposed death. And without their Captain, his crew quickly surrendered and were eventually taken to trial where they were all executed for their crimes of piracy.

When Roberts realized everyone he once knew was dead, he felt like a failure and not worthy of the title of Captain so he never took on the reins of one again. Changing his name once more to what we all know as, Ace Cooper.

Ace wasn't even sure he would be a part of a crew again but then he met Stede Bonnet looking to hire a crew.

Stede reminded Ace a lot of his old Captain Davis and he couldn't help but find himself joining his crew.

---

3. What is Ed’s favorite thing about him, and what is Stede’s?

Answer: I feel like Ed's favorite thing about Ace would be how protective and gentle he is to those he cares about and Stede's would be Ace's kindness toward others and his skills and abilities as a first mate.

4. If he lived in modern times, what kind of music would he like to listen to?

Answer: Rock!

5. What would be the title of his autobiography?

Answer: Who is the real me? A Self-Discovery Exploration.

[jeffstincotingz]

Oh. My. Gosh!!!!! Look at what I just found right here:

Here, as you can see, Jeff Stinco is listed on the website called OnThisDay.com, where they have listed him under the August 22, 1978 section underneath "Famous Birthdays".

Sometimes between 2018 or 2019, On This Day listed James Corden next to Jeff Stinco, who is still in the "Famous Birthdays" section for August 22, 1978, and I am supposed to be okay with that? This is not right at all.

Here are the people born on August 22, 1975. Jeff Stinco isn't even listed here, for crying out loud!

Here, they made Jeff's name go up in terms of popularity between him and James Corden. At least they knew something they didn't know about. But they still went ahead and made his year of birth/age incorrect!

Here is a full length version of famous people who were born in August 1975, and Jeff Stinco is not even listed on there, he's listed on the August 1978 section instead! What the firetruck?????

This isn't even funny. This isn't even that funny. This is not funny at all! Is On This Day joking? Do these people know that this is a game? I'm really angry about this. They literally put Jeff Stinco and James Corden right next to each other on the August 22, 1978 section on their website. You can't just put this iconic pop punk king next to some loser who does carpool karaokes for a living on his talk show and who can't act to save his life like that! That's not how it works around here, On This Day!

Here, in the world of Jeff Stinco, you have to at least fucking try to get his year of birth and his age correctly right. 1978 is not the year he was born in!

Jeff Stinco was born in 1975, meaning that he was born around the same time as Charlize Theron (who was born sixteen days before Jeff) and Rodrigo Santoro!

He was not born around the same time as James Corden and Kobe Bryant!

Jeff Stinco and James Corden don't even belong together, and I wouldn't want to believe that a beautiful angelic man like Jeff, would be born around the same time as some slimy slimeball talk show host!

Now what if I changed every single website and told everybody that Jeff Stinco was born in 1975 and that he should've been a Grammy winner, a Oscar winner, a Emmy winner, and also even a Tony winner, to make him become a EGOT at 47 years old?

Now that is some comedy gold right there.

Because Jeff Stinco, Charlize Theron, Sara Ramirez, Mbali Gasa, Sheree Murphy, Shelly Cole, Vera Jordanova, Daniella van Graas, Stéphanie Szostak, Eliza Carthy, Shaniqua Miles, Chynna Clugston Flores, Eicca Toppinen, Kyle Cook, Nick Loeb, Rodrigo Santoro, Casey Affleck, Taika Waititi, Mandy Leigh, Ingrid Rubio, Aryiro Strataki, Chris Nevin, N.D. Kalu, Trevor Pryce, Andy Hallett, Beau Morgan, Kaipo Spenser, Antony Cotton, Jamie McGonnigal, Renate Götschl, Rik Platvoet, Victor Zambrano, Alshermond Singleton, Edgar Renteria, Jimmy van Fessem, Koray Candemir, Jeremy Scott, Mahesh Babu, Mathew James Coad, Mike Lamb, Lise Mackie, Davey von Bohlen, Ronald Clarke, Anders Myrvold, Paul Gaudoin, Raegan Scott, Regan Upshaw, James Carpinello, Jason Gleasman, Joe Perry, Shoaib Akhtar, Mike Vrabel, Viaceslav Ivanovski, Bertrand Berry, Vijay Bharadwaj, Didier Agathe, Felicia Zimmermann, George Stults, İlhan Mansız, Simon Katich, Marcus Mastin, Marianne Garvey, Tracie Thoms, Alicia Witt, Charles Cornelius Smith, Clint Bolton, Robert Enes, Joe Andruzzi, Mark de Vries, Jeremy Horn, Molly Tuter, Petria Thomas, Morgan Ensberg, Shea Seals, Jonny Moseley, Mark Rudan, Gareth Farrelly, Jamie Cureton, Dante Basco, Radhi Jaïdi, Takahiro Suwa, Daniel Harding, James Black, Gaahl, Mase, and Mineiro all share the same birthday month and year as each other.

August 1975.

Is when these people were born.

That.

Just that.

That alone is literally funny.

Jeff Stinco and 81 other famous people were all born on August 1975.

It's way better than just putting Jeff's name up with people like James Corden, Kobe Bryant, Jess Margera, Kel Mitchell, Amber Brkich, and Countess Vaughn, and then claiming that he was born on August 1978, just like them, but he is not.

Holy Zydrunas Ilgauskas and Girmante Vaikute, I am so angry right now. I am so angry at these people and these websites not knowing who Jeff Stinco is and what year he was born in.

If James Corden ever starts doing a carpool karaoke episode with Jeff Stinco when he finally comes back to singing again on his talk show, I will lose my shit at this and there will be h-e-double hockey sticks to pay.

How dare you compare Jeff to that loser who is not a good actor, who is not a good comedian, his jokes are not even that funny, and oh, should I say this, he is terrible to his fans too, may I should say it again for once though?

I got anger management issues about three different things all at once: Jeff Stinco's year of birth and his age not being right by people, images and videos of Britney Spears attending the premiere of Once Upon a Time in Hollywood still being there on her name to this very exact day, and men with beards having no more than over 100,000 tweets to their names on Twitter and they are the ones who are child sex predators who does bad things to children. Those are the real things I am disgruntled about.

You're in a world into not being a Stinc Icon, On This Day. Screw your "accuracies" if you can't get Jeff's age right!

Make Jeff Stinco a singer again, On This Day. You'll get it right soon, you know? And he will get his singing career back and live his life in peace, thank you very much for reading this and goodbye ;)

[darknessfactor]

Avocadon’t, Maybe?

A/N: I hAD TO

Based on this quote.  Ignores the Ragnarok post-credits scene.

They were aiming for Norway.  They didn’t hit Norway.

Or at least, that’s what Thor cheerfully tells him when Hulk finally cedes control back to Bruce.  Apparently it’s only be three days this time, and Hulk was mostly content to spar with Valkyrie when he got bored.  Then their ship had started to hurtle towards Earth, and then they’d crashed, and Hulk claimed boredom before shrinking back down to Bruce.

“If we didn’t get to Norway,” and Bruce doesn’t even know why they’d wanted to go to Norway in the first place, “then where are we?”

Korg pops out of nowhere, and Bruce nearly jumps out of his skin - one, because what the hell, and two, because the only other person he knew who was capable of that was definitely not a tall rock person - and says, “The nice fella I just talked to said we’re in some place called New Zee-land.”  

Bruce drops his forehead onto his knees and starts laughing.

Thor isn’t very thrilled when he sees exactly where New Zealand is in relation to Norway, but he cheers up slightly when Bruce explains that it’s where Lord of the Rings was filmed.  

“An excellent tale of your people,” Thor praises.  “Except the elves, they’re pretentious pricks.”

Bruce catches Valkyrie’s eye, and gives a very deliberate cough.  Valkyrie hiccups.

At any rate, their crash won’t have gone unnoticed.  They need to figure out where in New Zealand they are, and they need to find out where civilization is.  For now, they seem to be out in the jungle, and while they have plenty of food on the ship, it won’t last forever.

Bruce immediately volunteers to try to find a town.  Korg got vague instructions from the guy he’d talked to, but looking at a map, Bruce thinks he can pinpoint where it is.  Valkyrie volunteers as well, claiming that she’ll be protecting Bruce, but as soon as they’re on the road, Bruce gives her the side-eye.

“You just want a drink,” he accuses.

“What?  Noooo,” Valkyrie says.  “Well, yeah, but not just that.”

Bruce shrugs.  “’S okay.  It’s refreshing, to be honest.  You’re one of the few people who doesn’t treat me like a ticking time bomb.”

Valkyrie startles him by laughing.  “What?  You and Hulk, a ticking time bomb?  Yeah, right.  You’re both fucking teddy bears, you are.  Hulk’s just a bit of a bigger teddy bear.”

Bruce raises an eyebrow, unsure what to do with that mental image.  “Thanks, I guess?  You should probably realize that humans are a bit more, uh... fragile.”

“Yeah, I guessed that after you broke your neck to get Hulk to switch with you.”

Bruce snorts, but concedes the point to her.

There’s a goat, tied to one of the posts holding up the town’s sign.  It’s called Ono.  It seems appropriate.

There are a few stores, and a few places to eat.  Valkyrie makes a beeline for the liquor store, in her Sakaar leather-clad regalia.  No one gives her a second glance.  It’s Bruce who draws more confused looks, probably because he’s once again dressed in Tony’s clothes and really wishing he wasn’t.

He ends up following Valkyrie into the liquor store, only to find her arguing with the owner over prices.  That’s when he remembers that none of them exactly have any human money, and he sighs.

“Val,” he calls, and she spins around, looking confused.  “C’mon, we’ve seen what we needed to.  We should head back.”

She opens her mouth to argue, but something about his expression must convince her, because she follows him back out the liquor store and into an Internet cafe where he can use the phone that Thor gave him.  He breathes a sigh of relief when he discovers that Tony has kept his account open, and manages to get some cash from the disgruntled teller at the bank.

“Here,” he says, shoving half at Valkyrie.  “Don’t go too nuts over it, okay?”

“Sure,” she answers, thumbing through it with a frown.  “By the way - ‘Val’?”

“Valkyrie’s more like a title than a name.”

“Val.”  She says it with the air of someone trying a new kind of food for the first time.  “Well my real name is shite, so I’ll take it.”

While Valkyrie is buying as much booze as she can (Bruce doesn’t have the heart to tell her that it probably won’t affect her), he manages to use some of his so-called ‘awkward charm’ (named by Natasha) to get information from some of the townsfolk at the local coffee place.  All their gossip centers around the jail, where their first criminal in over twenty years is being held.

“What’d they do?” Bruce asks.

Dan, who’s had a few too many shots of espresso, leans forward and half-whispers, “Stole seventeen of Harry’s avocados, would you believe it.  Seventeen!  Looked like fucking Santa Claus, she did, carrying that thing over her shoulder.”

Bruce is sorely tempted to tell the man that he’s sharing a body with Hulk, and has been spending the last two years on an alien planet.  He decides to let Dan marvel at their avocado thief, however.  

Two minutes later, the town sheriff comes into the coffee place and orders drink with three shots of espresso, before turning to Bruce with an irritable glare.

“Your friend Val’s locked up,” he says.  “Ned down at the liquor store says she assaulted him?”

Bruce sighs.

Valkyrie is in the process of becoming best friends with her cellmate by the time Bruce manages to get the teller to withdraw enough money to cover bail.  He’s pretty sure that the teller’s opinion of him has plummeted down into the negatives, and it doesn’t help that his current outfit belongs to a self-proclaimed asshole.

“I’m Tony Stark,” he mutters, and has the insane urge to giggle.

The deputy sheriff pops her chewing gum in his face when he asks to see ‘Val’, before grabbing the keys and trudging over to the cells.  Valkyrie is in the midst of howling with laughter at the story her blond cellmate is telling, thudding her fist against the ground and only making the floor shake a little.

“Someone was nice enough to post bail, Val,” the deputy says, unlocking the cell and opening the door.  

“Hey!” Valkyrie snaps, holding up a hand.  “Story’s not over, don’t interrupt.  Rude.”

“So then,” the blond continues, and Bruce’s heart nearly stops.  She’s facing away from him, so he can’t see her face, but - 

“Then, Steve turns around and looks at me and just says - completely deadpan, like, you would not believe the deadpan this guy can pull - ‘I thought there’d be more ass’.”

Valkyrie starts laughing again, hard enough that there are tears streaming down her face.  The deputy is standing at the open cell door and has taken out her phone, scrolling through what looks like Tinder.

“Well, I guess I’m off, but I’m very happy I got to meet you,” Valkyrie says.  There’s a little tilt to her voice and Bruce has to think about it for a second, but - yup, Valkyrie is definitely flirting.  “Maybe you wouldn’t mind if I came back and visited after your trial?”

Natasha - because it has to be Natasha, he’d know that voice anywhere - flirts right back.  “Mm, yeah, I wouldn’t mind.”

Valkyrie shoots her a wink before she saunters out of the cell.  “Hey, Bruce,” she says, clapping him on the back hard enough that he stumbles.  “That didn’t take long.”

That catches Natasha’s attention, and she spins around in her cell, finally giving him a good look at her face.  He’s startled by the change - she looks like she’s aged ten years instead of the two since they’re seen one another, with dark circles under her eyes and wrinkles around her mouth.  But her eyes still carry the wicked glint he’s familiar with, even when they’re round with shock.

“Bruce?” she says, her voice cracking.  Her composure returns almost immediately, and she smirks at him.  “Channeling you inner Tony, I see.”

Bruce winces.  Valkyrie’s good humor has abruptly vanished, and her gaze is moving between the two of them, assessing.  “Can we maybe not do that?” he asks.

Natasha’s smirk falls from her face.  “Alright,” she says.  She nods at Valkyrie.  “It was nice meeting you, Val.  Please, do come visit.”  Her attention turns to the deputy sheriff in a clear dismissal.  “So - what’s for lunch today, Ella?”

Bruce is half-dragged out of the station.  He and Valkyrie make their way down the street until they leave town, heading back to their ship.  He still can’t shake the whole shell-shocked feeling of seeing Natasha again.  It’s like a bucket of ice-cold water, but he can’t deny that it brings back the longing with a vengeance.

Halfway back to the ship, Valkyrie gasps.

“Shit,” she says.  “You’re hung up on her!”

Bruce would like to disappear now.  That sounds nice.

“And she’s hung up on you!  Great, there go my chances.”

“Wouldn’t discount yourself just yet,” Bruce mutters.  Natasha’s had two years to move on.  It’s the smart thing to do.

“Well, obviously there’s only one thing to do,” Valkyrie says, her voice hardening.

“Yeah, get back to the ship and figure out how we’re gonna feed thousands of hungry - “

“Break her out of prison.”

“ - Asgardians - Valkyrie, no, that is not what I said - “

As it turns out, once Valkyrie gets an idea in her head, she apparently just... doesn’t hear any protests against that idea.  She finds Thor as soon as they get back to the ship, hurrying away as Bruce asks weakly, “She could’ve broken herself out, so why hasn’t she?”

Thor, of course, is overjoyed by the prospect of seeing another teammate of his.  He’s even more excited at the idea of breaking her out of jail - never mind that the reason Natasha’s in jail could be important, Bruce knows that much at least - and in spite of the fact that New Zealand is a small country and they don’t have very far to run if they bring the local law enforcement down on their heads.

Loki takes one look at them, with their heads bowed together, and walks away, muttering to himself.

At first, Valkyrie and Thor try to come up with some kind of plan.  Bruce suggests paying Natasha’s bail.  They both dismiss his idea.

“You could just let Hulk smash the place up a bit,” Valkyrie suggests.  Bruce can practically feel Hulk perk up at the suggestion, and is reminded that Hulk missed Natasha as well.

“I don’t think that’s the best idea?” he hedges.  

“Hulk was last out for three days,” Thor says, clapping Bruce on the shoulder.  “I say Bruce should get three days as well.”

“Seems fair,” Bruce agrees.  In the back of his head, Hulk grumbles, but concedes.

In the end, Thor and Valkyrie give up on a plan.  They just decide to go into the jail, smash up stuff up, grab Natasha, and leave.  Hopefully before Ono decides to come after them with pitchforks.

The trek back into town takes half an hour, and this time all three of them draw stares.  Bruce shifts uncomfortably under the scrutiny as they make their way to the sheriff’s station, though he notices that the looks Thor gets are actually appreciative.

Of fucking course.

Thor bursts into the police station with a grin, says, “Hi, we’re here to get our friend,” then marches over to the cell and rips the door off.  The deputy blinks at them and then says to Thor, “Can I get a Snapchat with you?”

Natasha makes a show of dusting herself off as she leaves her cell.  She catches Bruce’s eye.  He mouths, “This wasn’t my idea,” at her.  Her mouth quirks in amusement.

Valkyrie looks thrilled.  “Wow,” she says, looking Natasha up and down.  “Not only are you, like, wow, but Thor says you’re one of the greatest warriors on the planet.  Nice.”

“You keep talking but all I see are biceps,” Natasha teases back, eyeing Valkyrie just as appreciatively.

Valkyrie preens.  “Yeah, I know.”

Thor finishes taking selfies with the deputy sheriff, and heads over to envelop Natasha in a hug.  Natasha hugs back just as tightly, smiling with genuine warmth at Thor.  

“Why are you in prison, anyway?” Thor asks her.

“I stole some avocados.”

“Jesus,” Bruce mutters.  “I thought they were joking.”

That’s the moment the sheriff shows up, with an actual gun this time, and starts shooting at them.

Loki takes one look at who came back from Ono with them, and promptly disappears.  Bruce almost snickers.  

Almost.  Because somehow Thor and Valkyrie have given them the slip, leaving the two of them in one of the corners of the camp so that they can... what?  Talk it out?  Bruce isn’t even sure where to start.  Ultron still feels like yesterday for him, but Natasha...

Before he can say anything, however, he finds himself wrapped up in her arms.

“I’m glad you’re safe,” she murmurs in his ear, before pulling away.  “Tony and I didn’t know... we couldn’t figure out where you were.  Less surprising, since you were on another planet, but... I was worried you’d been captured somehow.  With the Accords and everything, it’s dangerous out there.  For people like us.”

Bruce has no idea what the Accords are, but they don’t sound good.

“I’m glad you’re safe too,” he says.  “What’s with the hair?  And why were you in jail for stealing seventeen avocados?”

Natasha snorted.  “I’m on the run.  Again.  Most of the Avengers are, except Tony.  And Rhodey, I think.  A disguise seemed like my best bet.  Though this is actually the third time I’ve dyed it.”

“It looks good on you.”

“Thanks.”

They lapse into silence after that, during which time all of Bruce’s pent up feelings rise to the surface again.  He still doesn’t know where to start - it doesn’t quite feel like he missed her, but at the same time, he has missed her.  Does he say that?  Does he talk about what happened on Sakaar?

None of those things, apparently, because the first thing out of his mouth is, “You still haven’t told me why you stole a bunch of avocados.”

“Dip.”

Bruce pauses.  “...what?”

Natasha shrugs.  “I was hungry.  I wanted dip.  I was out of money.  I stole seventeen avocados so that I could make dip.”

“Bullshit.”

“Avocados are a super food.  What’s so hard to believe about that?”

Bruce shakes his head.  “And you just let them take you to prison?”

Natasha shrugs.  “This time was for a dumber reason.  It’s not as bad as last time, when I got caught spray painting buildings in Russian.  Or the time before that, when - “

“Have you just been... shuffling yourself through jails?”

“...maybe.”  Natasha pauses, thinks about it for a minute.  “I might’ve been a bit reckless.”

“You think?” Bruce mutters.

“Also, the town was called ‘Ono,’” Natasha adds, sniggering.  “Too good an opportunity to pass up.  My mug shot will be on the wall in their sheriff’s station for all eternity.  Like, ‘Ono, Natasha was here’.”

Bruce wonders if he’s fallen into some kind of fever dream, but something about the terrible pun and her casual attitude towards being in prison strikes him as definitely being Natasha.  And in that moment, the ache of missing her fades, like they’ve never been apart.

Natasha notices.  “What’s that smile?”

“Nothing.”  Bruce reaches out, pauses to give her time to move, and takes her hand.  “I’m just really happy you’re here.”

[jupiter-ghost]

I just finished "Our Flag Means Death." I have a few, okay a LOT of things to say. I will try to articulate all of my feelings as accurately as possible. *SPOILERS AHEAD. OBVIOUSLY*

[If you don't like this show, that's okay! You don't have to watch it! But consider watching. Maybe give this post a read. But you don't have to read, and you don't have to watch. Thanks!]

-IF THIS SHOW DOESN'T GET A SEASON TWO SO HELP ME LORD I WILL MARCH DOWN TO HBO WITH TAIKA WAITITI HIMSELF BY MY SIDE AFTER GATHERING AN ARMY OF QUEERS, POC, AND NEURODIVERGENTS UNTIL THEY FUCKING FILM AND RELEASE SEASON TWO I DONT CARE WHO YOU ARE OR IF YOU HATE THE GAYS WE WILL PREVAIL WE WILL GET A SEASON TWO

-This show is beautiful

-The amount of times I cried is comparable to that of Stede himself

-Every time there was just casual gay, my fiance and I excitedly held hands and I bounced with excitement

-I would die for the cast of this show

-Being gay isn't a crime! It's not vilified. It's not a joke. It's nothing like what I grew up with. I watched something that never would've existed when I was a kid. And I'm 19. I'm young. And that's so fucking sad.

-I got to see nonbinary representation. Real. Authentic. Nonbinary. Representation. By a nonbinary actor!!! What???!!! As someone who falls under the enby/masc umbrella, I sobbed. I was so excited to see Jim just be Jim. When Nana just casually used they/them? The casual acceptance by everyone? This show NORMALIZES being nonbinary.

-The kiss between Lucius and Pete? Chefs kiss

-The fact that it was like "Yep people have sex. Get over it!"

-It addresses toxic masculinity. The amount of times a man cried on screen? I lost count. Showing characters rebelling against toxic masculinity is so very much needed in today's society.

This show has the power to change someone's life. We got casual gays. Casual gender non-conformity. This show is a love letter to anyone who doesn't fit in with the white, cis, and hetero norms. I will be telling everyone I know about this show. I will be telling my LGBTQ+ class. I will be rewatching it.

This show left my heart /full./ The only other show to do this was Good Omens. Because Good Omens also featured LGBT rep. But not like this. Not even close to this. I know that with Season Two there will be more. But this show? This is /representation/. It's an LGBT love story. It's not a joke. It's not queerbait. It's a fucking real LGBT love story between two men.

It explores conformity. It explores performing. It explores trying to pretend to be something you're not. It explores coming out of the closet and then GOING BACK BECAUSE YOU'RE TERRIFIED.

This show gave one of the realist depictions of what it's like to be LGBT through the lens of fucking pirates. (Which I mean, what gay didn't want to be a pirate as a kid? Who still doesn't? I mean personally I just think it's even more of a nod to being gay but that's just me)

I was able to look at the screen and see someone like me up there. Not just in one character either. IN 👏 THE 👏 ENTIRE 👏 FUCKING 👏 CAST 👏 (except Izzy... fuck Izzy. Actor is lovely though! Really did an excellent job at making me hate him!)

Of course, this isn't a show for kids. But this show is a perfect example of what media should be! The shows that the next generation should be able to tune in and watch (kid friendly of course.) But I mean in the terms of representation.

To the cast and crew, THANK YOU. Thank you for giving us this beautiful show. Thank you for putting minorities front and center. I can't speak anything to what it's like to be anything but white. But this show addressed racism. It showed racism, called it out, showed the fucking impact, and made it abundantly clear THAT BEING A RACIST ISN'T FUCKING OKAY.

I will have more to say on this show later. But right now I'm full of emotion, my heart is beating so fast, and I can't fully articulate everything I want to say because this show just makes me so happy I want to run around and scream and move! I am so full of love for this show, excitement for their story, and passion for all of the real and authentic representation that I can't fucking sit still. And you know that when a show has the power to make you feel like that? That strongly? That it's a good show.

If you're someone who doesn't quite get what it means to be LGBT, watch this show.

If you're part of the LGBT community, watch this show.

If you read fanfiction and would like to see that onscreen, watch this show. (I'm not kidding.)

If you're a person of color, watch this show.

If you're neurodivergent, watch this show.

If you're a minority, watch this show.

If you're a living breathing human being, watch this show.

There's something for everyone.

Watch it. Share it. Rewatch it. Spread the word.

Just please, watch this show.

HBO is waiting to see how this show performs before they renew it. Most companies do that with anything dealing with minorities. Please, please, watch this show. If you don't like it, that's perfectly okay! But at least you gave it a shot and supported the creators, cast, and crew in the process.

[biblionerd07]

Hello! Long time listener first time caller etc etc. I love your blog and your fics and I always see you reblog a variety of tv shows and I was wondering if I could ask you for tv recs? I am struggling to latch onto anything but I’m looking for something that’s not too much of commitment and is p satisfying, kinda like Ted Lasso vibes with or without the comedy element. Truly would very deeply appreciate it, I always really love seeing you on my dash and reading your tags and posts in addition to the reblogs <3

Aw thank you! Oh man I genuinely watch so much TV lol. Totally know what you mean about needing not a ton of commitment in a show. After I lost my dog I could not watch ANYTHING with even a hint of plot for at least two months. I'm doing this in list form but it's long! I put where you can watch them but I'm in the US, so if you're not, I don't know where! I think in the UK most stuff that's on Hulu is on Amazon but I'm not 100% sure and idk about any other countries.

-Only Murders in the Building (Hulu) is about a group of people who live in the same apartment building who start a podcast together to try to solve a murder in their building. It's very funny! But it does require you to pay some attention since it's a murder mystery, so that may not be what you're looking for.

-What We Do in the Shadows (the TV show on FX or Hulu, but there's a movie that it's based on) is a mockumentary about vampires and doesn't really have an overarching plot from episode to episode and is very funny. Taika Waititi is one of the creators, though I believe he's not directly involved in running the TV show. And there's also Wellington Paranormal (I think it's on CW? but also HBO Max), which is also a spinoff from the What We Do in the Shadows movie! It's about the police officers in New Zealand who get called out to deal with the paranormal stuff, but it's really not at all spooky, just hilarious.

-the British show Ghosts (HBO Max) is very funny and very feel-good! A woman with a head injury can suddenly see the ghosts who live in the old house she just inherited. You will have unexpected feels for all the ghosts.

-Letterkenny (Hulu) is a good one for not needing to remember much from episode to episode. They do have jokes that reoccur (it's just about a group of friends in their small town so that's very natural) but it's not like you'll miss something if you don't remember that it's a running gag.

-Insecure (HBO Max) may have more plot than you want but it's lol funny and the upcoming season is the last and I'm SAD! It's about a woman who realizes her life is not what she wants and works to change it and deals with a breakup and friend group issues.

-We Are Lady Parts (a Muslim woman joins a punk band in London) and Girls 5Eva (a one-hit wonder 90s girl group tries to make a comeback) are both on Peacock but they both have plots you need to at least somewhat pay attention to.

-Idk if you're into competition shows but Nailed It (Netflix) is a hilarious baking competition show where the contestants are like not very good bakers.

-if you like "adult animation" type shows, I think Bob's Burgers (Fox? I think? I watch on Hulu) makes me actually lol every episode and there's really no plot from episode to episode

Okay I'm stopping there. I think I have a TV problem lol.

[aion-rsa]

What We Do in the Shadows Season 3: Harvey Guillén Wants Buffy to Train Guillermo

https://ift.tt/eA8V8J

This article contains spoilers for What We Do in the Shadows season 3 episode 3.

Things have changed for the Staten Island vampires on What We Do in the Shadows season 3 as they step into positions of power. This may not make much of a difference for Colin Robinson (Mark Proksch), whose new job as secretary of the Vampiric Council, is much like his fake job, at a cubicle in an office. But Laszlo (Matt Berry) may spend a little more in the potting shed. His love Nadja (Natasia Demetriou), is running the council, along with Nandor (Kayvan Novak), who’s familiar, Guillermo (Harvey Guillén), has been promoted to the position of bodyguard. It was easier than killing him.

Based on the 2014 feature film by Jemaine Clement and Taika Waititi, What We Do in the Shadows follows four vampires, who have been roommates for longer than anyone cares to remember, as they cope with life in the modern world. Which is not held up on the shoulders of four horses.

Nandor the Relentless was a fierce and terrible Ottoman warrior, known for pillaging villages and turning the Euphrates red with blood. Guillermo worked at Panera Bread. The bond that ties vampire to familiar is a strange one. The pay isn’t great, the hours are daunting, and they don’t get employee-of-the-month plaques. The only real incentive is the promise of everlasting life as a ravenous bloodsucking fiend, and there is something of a hiring freeze at the moment.

British Iranian actor and voice artist Kayvan Novak co-created and starred in the British prank show, Fonejacker, and also can be seen alongside Matt Damon and George Clooney in Syriana, as well as the films Cuban Fury and the Walt Disney live action remake of Cruella. He plays three different characters in Men in Black: International. Harvey Guillén acted in the movies The Internship and in Netflix’s Truth or Dare, and his TV works include The Magicians, and Zoey’s Extraordinary Playlist. He earned a GLAAD Media Award his role in the “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell Me What to Do” episode of Raising Hope, and made LGBTQ+ Latinx history by becoming the first queer Latinx actor to be nominated for Best Supporting Actor at the Critics’ Choice Award for his role as Guillermo de la Cruz. Starting Sept. 2, Guillén will also host After the Shadows, a new talk show following and discussing What We Do in the Shadows.

Novak and Guillén hovered over Den of Geek to speak about Nandor and Guillermo’s new job descriptions, as well as old habits, cloaks of many voices, and Van Helsing DNA.

Den of Geek: I wanted to congratulate you on your characters’ new duties. Is it more fun running vampires or running from them?

Kayvan Novak: Has Nandor run from a vampire? I guess I have. I think they’re equally as exhilarating and frightening.

Harvey Guillén: I would say fighting the vampires is exciting with all the combat when that opportunity comes up. Yeah.

Guillermo took out the entire local vampire command, but couldn’t stake a vampire council docent. Is Guillermo getting soft?

Guillén: I don’t think he’s getting soft. I think the only reason that he even put himself in that scenario is because he knew that his old housemates, because remember he moved out of the house, his old housemates were in danger. I think at the end of the day we forget that he had mostly only humans in the house. And you know, what separates us from everything else in the world is that humans are driven by emotion and have a conscience and have a heart. So he couldn’t live with himself, if he knew that they were set up by the Vampiric Council to be eliminated at this theater. That’s the only reason he goes and saves his chosen family. Even though they’re total assholes to him, he is still loyal at the end of the day. He’s still loyal to these four vampires, especially Nandor. I think that he’s not getting soft. He’s just starting to see what’s important to him and what’s worth fighting for.

Did the “Cloak of Duplication” episode come up because you were already doing the impressions?

Novak: I guess the writers had an idea. They had a sense that I was a bit of a mimic and I liked doing impersonations. And I think they decided to kind of craft an episode around that. I was slightly apprehensive of the number of impressions that they thought I could do considering I had to do all of my castmates who, although I could do impressions of some of them, I’d never done it to their faces. So it was a new challenge. Not only to learn very quickly how to impersonate them with their help, because they helped me along the way, and they told me how to deliver some of the lines. But then having to do that in front of them, it took some concentration.

Whose voice was the easiest?

Novak: I guess the easiest, or the one that I had done was Colin Robinson. Because he’s got a very specific [voice]. It’s kind of the closest to mine in a way. And the rhythms of it, very specific. Nadja’s voice and Kristen [Schaal]’s voice, I couldn’t actually do. I can only kind of do their physicality. So, the voices you hear are not my voice. They’re the voices of the actual actors. Guillermo’s voice, Guillermo’s delivery, that took a minute to kind of get into that groove. And then Matt Berry, Laszlo’s character, I’d never really tried an impression of him. And it was really more the physicality that I got into to deliver those lines in that rhythm, that really was the key in. Because you’re always trying to find the key in.

Harvey, what was it like hearing Guillermo come out of Novak’s throat?

Guillén: It was great. Because I’ve seen Kayvan do impersonations of everyone, he’s a master. I don’t think I’ve ever seen him do me in a full scene. Like he would make a good joke or mimic me and say, “Yeah, yeah, now my friend,” and he does like a caricature of my voice, which is always fun, but yeah, “you’re my best buddy,” that’s like an ongoing joke on set that he always does. But to really kind of do it and kind of really capture Guillermo’s inflections and the volume where he placed him. I was like, oh my gosh, this is great. I was in awe. Like I was like, this is great. I had to do a double take, like that’s not me. That’s wait. That’s not me. Okay.

Blade, Buffy, the Frog brothers, and now Guillermo. Guillermo is the descendant of the greatest Slayer of all slayers. Is this nepotism?

Guillén: I don’t know if it’s nepotism because I don’t think he’s gotten anything handed to him. And he’s worked really hard for everything he has, and even now being the descendant of Van Helsing, it’s still not easy. Now, it comes with another wagon full of problems and choices to be made and predicaments that he now has with his housemates. But I would love to see some of those legendary slayers and chosen ones make an appearance and guide him, maybe help him out. Maybe Buffy pops in and says, I’ll show you how it’s done. That’d be great. Or Blade comes back, Wesley Snipes comes back. We’ve already had him. Who knows? But yeah, I would love to see someone show him the ropes or take them under their wing or, he’s learning by trial and error. And I think so far he’s doing okay. So maybe he’s a self-made Slayer in his own way.

When Nandor and Nadja were introducing themselves to the rogue vampires, you are each soloing, but hitting the beats at the same time. Can you just walk me through the rehearsal of the timing?

Novak: I think to really nail a scene like that, we’re both kind of focused on the direction of, I think Yana Gorskaya directed that scene. And that was just a case of us kind of working together, but also allowing her to kind of pull us through the scene to make sure that we hit those marks perfectly. It took some practice, took a few takes, took rehearsal, but you always know you’re going to get it. And you know that if you’ve got to get something that’s a bit of a challenge to get to, you want to be in the right company. And, and thankfully, we are because we’re in each other’s company.

Harvey, when you interject objections and you break and you look at the camera, they’re like hi-hat taps, are these scripted or are you doing it strictly on an intuitive basis?

Guillén: No, I don’t think I’ve ever seen it scripted for Guillermo that he looks at the camera. I think we do, as we do a rehearsal and we have our DP and our director follow us through rehearsal and whatever feels organic in the moment, there has to be an organic beat. Right? So, if it’s, most of the time it is Guillermo, because he’s the only human in the room, aside from the camera crew. And so, when he looks at the camera crew, it’s like, oh God, you’re going to film this, aren’t you? And the camera catches that moment. And it zooms into it. It’s like, you’re not, oh no, it’s incriminating. And so, as you connect with another human. Did you hear what he said? Or did you, I can’t believe they’re talking like this because who are you going to connect with the vampires who live in their own world of lust and pleasure and feeding. They don’t care, they’re immortal, but the humans in the room are like, we can go to jail at any moment for a lot of these things. I can get in trouble myself.

So, most of the time, when Guillermo looks at the camera, it’s either out of fear or it’s either like I’m smarter than them and you see that, right? So it’s like you saw that, right? But he can never say it. So he can’t verbally say what he’s feeling. So, their face does it all for you to the camera.

Did Guillermo and Nandor meet at Panera Bread?

Guillén: We talked about this. I think the idea that, if he was working at Panera Bread, it must have been shortly after high school or something. And somewhere along the lines, he must’ve met Nandor, he must’ve come in when Panera was closing and maybe tried to feast on him? Maybe, I don’t know. The backstory I gave myself was, he convinced Nandor not to feast on him and kill him, but to service him in return to become a vampire. That’s the backstory I gave myself. But Kayvan, what do you think?

Novak: I think whatever happened there’s CCTV footage of it-

Guillén: Somewhere. Yeah.

Novak: And I think that would be the best way of revisiting that because, if they didn’t have a documentary crew following them, then they’re relying on kind of just, incidental cameras, capturing stuff. I think it would be cool.

Guillén: I think that’s cool. Yeah.

Nandor is 758 years old, and going through an eternal life crisis. Is he becoming too Americanized or does Nadja have a point about there not being anything more to existence than just slaughter?

Novak: It’s a funny one because he’s been around so long, you’re supposed to eventually just blend into your environment and be taken over by and become an American or become a Staten Islander. And for some reason they live in such an insular world that they resisted this. But now for some reason, whether it be an emotional light that’s gone off in his head, he’s decided that no, he wants to humanize himself more and, yeah, be more like the people that he kills, almost. The world that he feeds off. He wants to be part of that. And I think, Nadja, she’s the cynic she’s like, stop dreaming. Stop. You know, there’s always that person that’s like, yeah, you could do that. But there’s lots of people that want to do that too, you know? And you’re like, oh, you’re right. I better not waste my time chasing pipe dreams. There’s always that person in the room and that person, for Nandor, is Nadja.

What’s it like to act against Nadja’s doll?

Guillén: Such a diva. Yeah. Difficult. Late to set. She always has to be carried. I don’t know if it’s in her rider, but the doll has to be carried by two, like men-

Novak: Dressed in green.

Guillén: Dressed in green. Yeah.

Novak: I actually did have to do a couple of scenes where there’s a montage sequence with me and the doll and we actually got onto some really funny stuff. I was teaching her sword fighting, a bit of a spoiler, but it’s very quick. I don’t know if it made it in but I was teaching her sword fighting and then I was like, well, we might as well have a sword fight. And then she disarms me and then she chases after me and I run. But I don’t know if that made it in the cut. I just decided that would have been a funny thing to do. To be disarmed by this doll. I think Nandor has a soft spot for the doll. Obviously, it’s a cool bit of special effects that’s for sure. It’s awesome.

What will you be getting Colin Robinson for his hundredth birthday?

Novak: A new contract. You know, his management team has been slacking.

I was talking with Mark Proksch about the physical comedy and Harvey, yours is particularly perilous. What’s the choreography prep like and making those fight scenes hit their funny marks?

Guillén: Well, I think physical comedy is just as good as you know, anything we do, so I mean, a lot of us do physical comedy in the show, but you never see Guillermo really in motion to do physical comedy most of the time it’s because he’s always so put together. So even with the combat and fighting, the note that Jermaine gave me for the finale was, Harvey doesn’t know he’s been at this. All right. So he doesn’t know what’s happening. So it was more of an idea that his face is like “what’s happening?,” But his hands were coordinated and bad-ass, and that’s the way I’ve been playing him. And now that he’s coming into his own, now he’s more relaxed into his own power of Van Helsing. But it’s also funny. It’s just funny to see someone who’s like a baby duck, like learning to walk for the first time. It’s like he’s trying. And you know, so that physical comedy comes in hand.

Kayvan, can you tell me what it was like working against Aida Turturro and learning to love after, after 37 wives?

Novak: Aida was a riot, from day one. She was a fan of the show, which is always wonderful and incredibly flattering. She was so into the show, she was so into the world and into us as performers. And I think that just, she had so much fun when she was there and we had some intimate scenes. The first time you see us, she’s on her back and I’m on top of her. And that’s quite an introduction. But she just went with it, you know? And it was just a lot of fun, a lot of fun with her and yeah, we just spoke to her today actually, and she was singing the show’s praises again. And she’s genuinely so excited. She’s not keeping her cool or trying not to be a fangirl about it. She was just super enthusiastic to be there. And you feed off that. You love that.

cnx.cmd.push(function() { cnx({ playerId: "106e33c0-3911-473c-b599-b1426db57530", }).render("0270c398a82f44f49c23c16122516796"); });

What We Do in the Shadows airs Thursdays at 10:00 p.m. on FX.

The post What We Do in the Shadows Season 3: Harvey Guillén Wants Buffy to Train Guillermo appeared first on Den of Geek.

from Den of Geek https://ift.tt/3niKJN3

[exdeputysonso-archive]

Okay, honesty hour, you've been posting MCU negativity and I am SO WITH YOU. Give me your time travel and time skip thoughts. Did any of Endgame make sense to you? What did you hate most? For me it was Steve getting Thor's hammer, because it felt like the last two movies took everything away from Thor, including his arc. Why not let Steve use the hammer and Thor use the shield, show they are a TEAM? Not just the Steve and Tony Show? Sorry if this is too much if a rant. Please do rant back.

Oh I'm happy to rant and hear other people rant about the MCU! Being a Steve fan myself, I gotta be honest... I didn't hate the hammer scene. Because if anyone else is worthy, it would be Steve. It was one of the few Steve moments in the movie that I enjoyed and that I feel didn't totally regress his character development. But I agree in general about Endgame taking away everything from Thor and reversing all of his development that was laid out in Ragnarok. So I understand your argument there.

As far as the time travel stuff, I feel like any movie about time travel is going to have logical problems. But still, for a movie on this scale they could and should have done better. A lot didn’t make sense. My biggest complaint time-travel-wise is that even the writers and directors could not agree on the rules of the time travel. The Russo brothers said that Steve going back in time created a new timeline, and the writers Markus and McFeely said that Steve stayed in the same timeline and was Peggy's husband all along.

There is a lot I hated about Endgame, but I’ll talk about the two things that make me angriest. The first is Endgame claiming to have the "first lgbt" character in a marvel movie. The fact that Taika Waititi wanted to have a reveal for Valkyrie in Ragnarok but we didn’t get that and instead we got gay Joe Russo in a throwaway scene that could be easily cut in other countries. And the way they HYPED that. It was embarrassing and insulting.

The second is Steve's ending. I have never been angrier in the middle of a movie theater. The way they ruined one of my all time fave characters! As soon as I saw the preview for Endgame with Steve looking at the pic of Peggy, I knew we were in trouble. Steve lost his two best friends to the snap, and he's over here thinking about Peggy who died years earlier of natural causes after having lived a full happy life??? Make it make sense!!! I feel like that they did this just so they could set up the dumb ending, but it's just Bad Writing™. In general, I feel like they were pushing so hard against the popularity of Stucky that they forgot that Steve and Bucky were even friends. They couldn't even give Steve, Bucky, and Sam a proper reunion or goodbye before Steve fucked off to the past? 

Now even if we ignore the fact that it is against Steve's character to leave his friends to just go settle down in the past, there are a slew of other problems. If we go by the Russo's explanation, Steve cannot just live the happy peaceful life they act like he was going to, knowing that Bucky is out there being brainwashed somewhere. Also he would have altered Peggy's life, taken away the life she would have lived on her own, and even her future HUSBAND from her. If we go with Markus and McFeely’s explanation, Steve didn't change the timeline which means he is over here living it up with Peggy while his past self is frozen in ice, and again, Bucky is out there being brainwashed and tortured. 

Anyways, I've made this entirely too long already. Especially when there are other people out there who have articulated it better than me lol. I was searching through my endgame posts and found some untagged negativity, so I've tagged it properly now, and you can see more of my thoughts as expressed by other people here!

[fandumbstuff]

Favourite Films from 2019

1. Portrait of a Lady On Fire Directed by Céline Sciamma

A gorgeous, gripping, and emotional vision enough to reduce me to tears. Portrait of a Lady on Fire is so may things all at once, it’s hard to pin it down. It seems on paper to be a romance, but as you get into it, the atmospheric tension conveys a sense of gothic horror. It leaves you uneasy but also enraptured, yearning but also soothed. A movie about art, love, depression and self-actualization that manages to blend them all seamlessly and elegantly. The cinematography, editing, performances, production design are all incredible, coming together under Sciamma’s hand to create a masterpiece of cinema. AND. That final scene is an absolute thrill ride.

2. Jojo Rabbit Directed by Taika Waititi

Taika Waititi might just be the best writer/director working today, and this is evident in everything he does, from the MCU to The Mandalorian to Jojo Rabbit. He demonstrates so well how he can work under a major studio and direct a blockbuster, but also direct a film that is so personal and meaningful. And the most incredible thing about Jojo Rabbit is that it isn’t some small indie film he made for himself. It’s a movie for everyone, under a major studio, for a wide audience. This is so integral to the message of this film. It’s one that everyone should be able to watch and yes, enjoy and laugh at, but also feel uncomfortable, emotional and cripplingly saddened by. It’s the most important movie he has made, one that we should all be grateful for. 

3. Parasite Directed by Bong Joon-Ho

The movie that finally gave Bong Joon-Ho wider attention, and rightfully so. His usual themes of social class and the degradation of civility are portrayed so effectively and empathetically in Parasite. Instead of the insane atmospheres of his earlier genre films, Parasite is about such a mundane situation that is put on a slow burner, simmering and bubbling to a chaotic crescendo. The emotional journey of watching this film in cinemas was incredibly rewarding, as I laughed alongside an audience- at first in good humour, then uncomfortably, and then silenced with baited breath, gripped with tension, shock and horror.

4. Extra Ordinary Directed by Mike Ahern and Enda Loughman

Totally and unfairly flying under the radar, Extra Ordinary was the funniest movie I saw last year. The multiple hilarious references to classic horror films, the self-mocking use of genre tropes, and one brilliant performance from Will Forte had me in stitches the whole time. At its heart, its a simple emotional story, enough to be not just funny, but also undoubtedly charming.

5. The Last Black Man in San Francisco Directed by Joe Talbot

Its incredible that in Joe Talbot’s directorial debut, he crafted a film so  singularly artistic. Jimmie Fails’ story is one that is so beautifully poetic, and the film plays out like dream. It’s a story that is culturally relevant, undoubtedly, but also innately emotional and moving. Themes of race, masculinity, art and architecture are woven together cohesively in this exquisite film.

6. Booksmart Directed by Olivia Wilde

Speaking of impressive directorial debuts. Olivia Wilde breathes new life into raunchy coming of age tales with Booksmart. While this film has consistently been compared to Superbad, it should be clear that it is infinitely better than it. Booksmart is not simply a lewd comedy, but one with a strong understanding of it’s heart. It convinces us an audience to buy into the lead characters, root for them, relate to them, and yes laugh at and with them. 

7. Avengers: Endgame Directed by Anthony and Joe Russo

It cannot be understated just how monumental this film is. Kevin Feige and the team at Marvel Studios have achieved an impossible goal, and in only ten years. They have brought superheros out of the fringes of pop culture and made them immediately relevant and alluring. Avengers Endgame is an incredible celebration of the MCU, with moments of fan service that at times might seem pandering, but mostly tasteful and joyous. Endgame’s references to the past are filled with a self-aware sense of humour, and respect for its humble beginnings. Marvel forever changed theatre-going experiences to not just watching a movie, but sharing in a cultural event. And Endgame is a touchstone in cinema history. A shared experience amongst fans. And while it might not be proper to call it art, maybe it doesn’t need to be, because it stands apart nevertheless. 

8. Toy Story 4 Directed by Josh Cooley

I really liked it okay? On paper, this movie seemed like a bad idea, as Toy Story 3 was so incredible and I couldn’t imagine a better ending. But as I got into Toy Story 4, I see it’s importance to the story. It truly delves into the minds of these characters, and questions what happiness means to them. Tom Hanks brought to life a piece of my childhood (and indeed many childhoods like mine), and this film allows us to see Woody off to his cathartic destiny. 

9. Rocketman Directed by Dexter Fletcher

Unexpectedly brilliant, Rocketman sets itself apart from most formulaic biopics. It leans into the fantasy of Elton John’s music, and carries us trancelike through his life. Taron Egerton’s powerhouse performance fills in the nuances of Elton’s emotions. In the most gregarious bits of showmanship, to the darkest pits of despair, Egerton ensures that we empathize with, relate to, and celebrate the life of Sir Elton.

10. Little Women Directed by Greta Gerwig

Following the success of Lady Bord, Little Women is a daring choice for a second film. But Greta Gerwig proves that her prowess as a director has only gotten sharper. Her adaptation feels immediately compatible, honing in on the heart of the novel, and concisely translating it to a film that is funny, charming, and moving. Gerwig once again brings out the very best in Saoirse Ronan- her Jo March is equally headstrong and gentle, and every bit the iconic character that has been celebrated for decades. Timothee Chalamet really rocks it too. 

Honorable Mentions:

Blinded by the Light (Directed by Gurinder Chadha), Knives Out (Directed by Rian Johnson), Dolemite is My Name (Directed by Craig Brewer), John Wick: Chapter 3 - Parabellum (Directed by Chad Stahelski), The Lighthouse (Directed by Robert Eggers), The Irishman (Directed by Martin Scorsese), Ford v. Ferrari (Directed by James Mangold)

[lucianalight]

@philosopherking1887 I wish I didn’t see this article that you linked in @lokiloveforever​  ‘s post, and remained blissfully unaware of all other awful things that TW has said about our beloved characters and the franchise we loved. At the same time I’m happy because it basically confirms everything we were saying this whole time. So thank you for it. While I was reading it, I had to remind myself that using my phone to break my laptop’s screen won’t do anything good. Instead I’m going to list all the reason’s that TW’s own words refute some of TR fans points and how it proves that Ragnarok isn’t part of MCU. Fair warning: this might resembles a rant because I’m really angry right now.

- “Ragnarok characterizations are like comics more than any other movie.”

Hate to break it to you but,

Cool art but he didn’t like how everyone talked? Well, you know who he reminds me of?

He removed one of the things that made Thor franchise unique and interesting, simply because he didn’t like it. And came up with this nonsense that Thor learned it from Tony, wait no, from RDJ, as an excuse.

“Yeah, Thor spent two years on Earth hanging out with Robert Downey, Jr.” Waititi explained. “So he’s got some sass. He knows a little bit more about irony and sarcasm now. He’s got a little bit of Earth humor.” [X]

Like two years of being on Earth in comparison with more than a thousand years on Asgard can change someone’s speech patterns.

Again with the rich kid comments.

“Thor and Loki are just two rich kids from outer space and we shouldn’t really give a sh*t about what their problems are.” [X]

This also shows he didn’t even watch or understood the previous movies. The whole point of the first Thor movie, was that this rich kid that we apparently shouldn’t give a shit about his problems, had fallen from grace and felt guilt for his wrong actions and tried to be a better person. But apparently the TR version, who thinks he’s a hero and always right and has the audacity to judge and use every character for his own goals feels guilt and is annoyed at his behavior. Yeah, okay.

The picture is taken from this post.

And don’t get me start on Bruce/Hulk. This bipolar, angry green beast who a lot of children have found empathetic, and who some of us boring, whining nerds can identify with has never felt guilt about his actions. It’s not like he tried to commit suicide because of his guilt and self-loathing. It’s not like Hulk has enough heart and intelligence to be upset about hurting innocent people in AoU after he was snapped out of Wanda’s mind control. But apparently killing slaves for sport and not feeling guilty about it give the character more dimensions. Right.

But, hey, as far as TW is concerned, people like Bruce and Loki who are suicidal and have mental illness are just whiny and need to get over themselves.

“Taika Waititi (…) is swift to launch into a description of Loki, the unbeloved son of Asgard, as, “someone who tries so hard to embody this idea of the tortured artist, this tortured, gothy orphan.” He’s discussing the character’s emotional arc in the film, one that sees him put away his childish fixations and step up to save his city from obliteration; to put into perspective his petty family squabbles and realise a home is still a home.” [X]

Anyone still thinks TW is not talking like an ableist?

And don’t forget that being pretty, talking and looking beautiful, not being able to fight like a warrior, and being a nerd are character flaws and make people boring.

“[With Valkyrie] I wanted to make sure we weren’t making a female character that was boring and pretty. What I wanted was someone who was going to play the opposite and be even more of the ‘guy’ character than the guys.” 

I wonder why I am reminded of the bullies I encountered in my life!? (I don’t)

- “TW loved those characters. Otherwise he wouldn’t use them in his film.”

Yeah, no. Not true. Because of all the above reasons about Thor and Hulk and all the reasons I listed in this post about Loki.

Oh, Look! he just confirmed this recent post of mine:

And yours too @magicmastered.  Btw, I completely support your idea to call Ragnarok universe “RCU”.

Also TR lacking emotions was a deliberate choice by the director. Like Korg’s line when Asgard was destroyed was intentionally put there to undermine the scene’s entire impact. 

Can someone please explain to me, a non-privileged person who’s always struggled with economical problems, that why being privileged and rich is considered a bad thing?

Again this is another proof that TW didn’t see and understood the previous movies. Asgard had a warrior culture and looked down on magic users(Loki). Magic that Thor explained was science that humans still don’t understand. Asgard has no parties? Yeah, like it’s totally true:

TW was so allergic to emotions that he changed Odin’s death scene because the audience reacted to it with too strong emotions! Imagine that!

Yeah, yeah, I know, we need to smile more!

The article ends with this paragraph.

“It's important to remember that Taika Waititi didn't make Thor: Ragnarok in isolation. He was chosen to direct this film by Marvel Studios off the back of black comedies, and they supported him in all his creative decisions. That may well indicate that Waititi's distaste with the Thor franchise is shared by Marvel, that they consider the last two to number among their weakest, and that they too wanted to toss the old aside in favor of a straightforward superhero comedy.”

And I agree. TW is not the only person I blame for TR. CH and Marvel Studios are all to blame for making a mockery of the franchise and characters we loved.

[typewriting-angel]

Comfy Couch

A/N: I was so close to posting this, but got pulled away to dinner. I started rambling at the end, so I hope it's coherent. Thank you for your request @rororo06 , I adored writing this.

Word Count: 1127

Warnings: the couch debacle

If you liked this, then show it, it really helps. My requests are always open.

Walking down the expo’s press carpet, multiple journalists called out to your boyfriend and close friend, begging for any information the pair could give. You had your fingers laced with Sebastian’s as media outlets took photographs, preparing to write click bait articles accusing you and Sebastian of wild things. During this hour of slowly waltzing down a hall, you had to keep your best smile on to prevent a rumor of break up. Seb pulled you to a journalist, immediately jumping into the interview. You let go of his hand to step out of the shot better, a move you normally did during red carpets just to keep everything seamless for future purposes.

What you normally did while shying away from the cameras was check your phone. At expos, conventions, and award shows, a quiet second where you could be a normal person checking their emails was precious. However, this time around was quite different. You felt a tap on your shoulder, swiftly turning to see a reporter and accompanying cameraman. “Hi Y/N, I’m Elaine, I have a couple of questions for you. Do you think you could spare a minute to talk to us?”

You glanced to your significant other, he nodded to answer your silent question of “should I?” When you turned to the reporter, your smiled widely, “Of course, Elaine! But I hope you know that I really can’t answer anything about shows.”

Elaine laughed, “Don’t worry, we just wanted to clear the air about a popular rumor started by your boyfriend’s costar, Anthony Mackie.”

Your shoulders dropped, you knew it was the couch debacle. “If this is about the couch, I’m going to let y’all know that the couch we bought is something that you can buy at any furniture store. It’s like a thousand dollars, which is kinda pricey, but it’s a big couch.” You brushed hair behind your ears, trying to not look visibly frustrated by the whole couch rumor.

“And what about the cashmere blankets? Do those exist or is Mackie lying?” Elaine shifted the microphone towards you, only to be hijacked by Mackie himself.

“You know, I’ve probably slept on their couch more times than them, so I know what I’m talking about. There were tiny blankets on that couch that were so soft, they might have been clouds.” Anthony cleared his throat and continued, “I don’t know where they got clouds, but I’m going to find out.”

Sebastian appeared behind you, placing a hand in your back pocket while coming around to defend your couch. He grabbed the mic from Anthony, almost aggressively. “Our blankets are normal sized, you just don’t know how to unfold them. Also, they aren’t clouds, they’re made out of minky fleece, the stuff baby blankets are made out of.”

Elaine grabbed the microphone, “So it’s true that Anthony has crash on your couch then?”

You leaned forward to answer, “Never, he has only been over for meals and has spilled wine on our carpets on multiple occasions. Let the record show that Anthony Mackie seems to have a grudge on freshly cleaned carpet as well as the nice rugs we have in our home.” After answering, you leaned into Sebastian’s chest, waiting for the argumentative answer brewing in Anthony.

“I don’t hate your carpets, I just think going with light grey for carpeting is a bad choice. I’m going to leave it at that.”

Sebastian sighed, “At this point, people will start to think we don’t let anyone in our house.”

Elaine kept smiling, probably worried about this madness. “Not to be rude and change the topic, but this one is about your job, Y/N.”

You nodded, “Okay, go for it.”

“You’ve been with Disney, more specifically Marvel for almost a decade, starting your list of works with Captain America: First Avenger. Would you ever branch out and do other shows like Star Wars or something like Aladdin?” Elaine read off her phone, looking up to catch your anwer.

You stepped forward, “Well, I’d love to do more, but I think I can do better with shows that no one has seen before so we get more free reign than a show previously released or from a set universe. Personally, I’d love to do a live action Brave movie, but that won’t be on the horizon for a long time.” You felt a sense of pride over your work, though it was smaller in comparison than most thought,

“That’s all the questions we have for you today, thank you for letting us borrow you for a minute.”

You smiled again, “Always, it’s not everyday I get to argue about the couch I bought. Have a good day, Elaine, it was a pleasure to meet you.”

The three of you continued down the wall of reporters and cameramen. Sebastian had switched to holding your hand again, giving a gentle and loving squeeze. “Anthony, will you please stop talking about our couch and making discourse? It’s just a couch.”

Both you and Sebastian found it funny for a while, then you were attacked daily on twitter about posting photos of your couch. That was an invasion of privacy, millions of people wanted to be virtually inside your home to inspect if you were normal or not.

Anthony turned towards you, raising his right hand, “I vow to stop talking about the couch unless directly prompted to. But those blankets were small and not folded, I will stand my ground on that.” You were not about to fight about blankets in public, that was unprofessional. However, that didn’t stop you from ordering Anthony a giant blanket while you sat at a panel.

Continuing down the red carpet you spotted Taika Waititi with Jeff Goldblum and Paul Bettany. You were so excited to see some familiar faces. Your little groups meshed and left the press room, going towards the stages and conference rooms. You were thankful to catch up with your old friends.

Taika had originally met you at the set of Civil War where you were a costume technician while on a director’s visit. It was how you met all your celebrity friend and boyfriend, patching up costumes in between takes on Marvel movies. It wasn’t your intention to be the face of Marvel costuming, but when you publicly announced your relationship with Sebastian, you became a beacon of Marvel’s costuming department. You felt bad about having all the credit placed on your shoulders rather than the master minds who sewed for days on end and sketched the beautiful costumes to life. But alas, it gave the costuming department of Marvel a good rep and a face to present it. You just prayed Mackie wouldn't start talking about any other furniture in your home.

[donateliamitsuki]

MCU Wishing List.

It's very general. Nothing specific. I guess it's stuff I want from Phase Four.

Anyway. Enjoy my rambling!

Can we PLEASE acknowledge Loki is a Frost Giant again please? Seriously we haven't seen that since the first Thor film.

Let Loki transform into Jotun.

Let him use his ice powers already.

ANYTHING JUST BRING CANON JOTUN LOKI BACK!

I know asking for SamBucky to be canon it's too much,but if you won't do that can you at least make a straight romance interesting and not forced?🙄

Make Captain Marvel an actual character. I'm sorry. She's just... Boring somehow...

THOR👏OVERCOMES👏HIS👏DEPRESSION👏

WANDA👏GETS👏THERAPY👏

This could be something else but can we get some kind of series or something about the ones in the Soul Stone?

Like everyone who turned into dust ended there,what happened? How did they react? Why exactly none of them felt those five years or even remember what happened?

Anything with Pepper and Morgan. Let me see how my girls are going...

ANT-MAN 3 PLEASE

Any Spider-Man villain we HAVEN'T seen yet in the big screen? Or even reboot old ones...

I want the Sinister Six okay...

... I wouldn't mind Tom Hiddleston and Taika Waititi being the main ones taking care of the Loki Show...

WHERE THE HELL IS ADAM. HE GOT TEASED ON GOTG VOL.2 WHERE IS HE?!

Our dear magic trio: Wanda,Loki and Strange. I don't care how just give it to me!

I wouldn't mind having Gamora back like Quill needs a damn break already

What If... Loki didn't die in Infinity War.

What If... Thor was the adopted one by Jotuns.

What if... Thor was the Jotun.

Make some spin-off or something about Thor and Loki's childhood before everything became crap...

I'M STILL WAITING FOR LOKI AND THOR TO HUG MARVEL

Yes I'm thirsty for Loki and Thor content. But can you really blame me?

This could be cruel and too much but what the HELL did Thanos to Loki?

What happened to that black guy at the end of Doctor Strange...

NATASHA STARK

WHAT THE F U C K HAPPENED IN BUDAPEST?!

Make Jane Foster actually interesting. Save her. Don't let her be a love interest and nothing else please. Taika I'm trusting you!

GotG Vol.3 having posters where Thor is somehow changing "Guardians" into "Asgardians". Quill isn't pleased.

MORE OF VALKYRIE IN ANY SHAPE OR FORM I NEED MY Q U E E N.

More teen Groot. Need him.

LET ROCKET BE A DAD DAMMIT

Wholesome👏Mantis👏with👏Nebula👏

I need the Guardians to go to Earth and just chill there... I just need it in my life!!

IF YOU GIVE ROCKET A LOVE INTEREST YOU BETTER DO IT RIGHT!!

Sounds weird but you could change Stan Lee cameos with missing posters with his face or even RDJ. Why? Idk finding cameos was fun...

And last but not least: has nothing to do with the MCU exactly but I would love MCU Peter on the next Spider-Verse movie tbh.

[wolfpawn]

Once Bitten Twice Shy, Chapter 17

Previous Chapter

Chapter Summary -  Mark's wedding comes and Paige and Tom face a new challenge.

Tag, @wolfsmom1 @sweetkingdomstarlight-blog @damalseer @nonsensicalobsessions  @standing-onthe-edge @hiddlesbitch1

anyone else who wishes to be added to the tags, just ask :)

Tom could see why Paige warned him about Fiona’s family. They were a lot like how his family was but the other way around, in that in his family Uncle George was the only ass, in her family, Fiona seemed to be the only nice one. They clearly saw themselves as better than the Winters’ family as their money was longer in the family whilst Paige’s parents had been born to very modest homes, but Tom, they seemed to feel was more to their standard. He looked at Paige who was smirking at him as he listened to an overdramatic sister of Fiona’s who seemed adamant to inform him as many times as was humanly possible, that she was going to make it as a model any day now and more importantly, she was a better partner to have than Paige, more in keeping with his place in society. Tom did everything in his power not to laugh in her face, which was a difficult ask considering he had heard her speaking throughout the meal and to say they were not compatible was an understatement. His years of training as an actor never felt more required than when she said that. When she stated that Paige was boring and unexciting, he stopped her with the statement that if she was such, then he was even more so. She ceased her attention to him after that.

“Dare I ask?”

He turned to see Paige standing behind him after he tried to flee to the bathrooms.

“Caroline...I think?”

“It’s Carolina. She was Carol but it wasn’t fancy enough for the world of high-fashion so she changed it.” Paige laughed. “So, what did Carolina do or say to make you try and break into the ladies bathroom?”

Tom looked at the door and sure enough, the symbol of a woman was there. “Shit...Only how we are so well suited and to ditch you.”

“Odd, she said that when she met Derek too. Though going by the comments she said both at the time and after I dumped him, I think he got a sniff, if not the full shag out of her.”

“Wonderful individual by all accounts then?”

“I am just grateful that I didn’t catch anything from him as a result of everything,” Paige sighed. “That would have been only icing on the cake.”

Tom gently rubbed her hand. “Don’t, don’t think such terrible thoughts right now. Not on the night before your brother’s wedding. Not on such a joyous occasion.”

“You’re right. You’re a hundred per cent right. What would I do without you?” She smiled.

Tom gave a small smile and looked away, not trusting himself not to say anything.

*

When the end of the night came, Tom put his arm around Paige’s waist as they said goodbye, promising to be ready on time in the morning as they did. When they got to the room, they both prepared for bed, both having brought sleepwear as they both knew that at the very least, they would be sharing a room.

“Those look brand new.” Paige laughed as Tom attempted to find the tie for his sleep pants.

“They are. I don’t own too much bedwear,” Tom admitted before looking at her with a raised brow, seeing her in some form of cartoon nightclothes that he was sure his sisters liked as children.

“Judge me, I don’t care.” Paige shrugged as she walked over to her side of her bed and got in. “I will probably crash quickly enough. You don’t need to worry if you want to continue reading or anything. I am not bothered by lights and such,” She assured him as she got into the bed.

“Honestly, I am similar. I had a long week, as I told you already.”

“You should have just gotten some rest, flying to China to the US and then back for this. It’s madness.”

“I wanted to get Bobby ready for quarantine. Besides, how could I ever decline a chance to see what I am missing with Carolina.”

Paige snorted in laughter. “So true.”

Tom smiled as he saw her get comfortable. He watched as she got her book, one of short poems and began reading. He got into the bed too and groaned as he felt his aching muscles from all his travels begin to rest on the mattress.

“You sound like you need this,” Paige commented. “I’m sorry you don’t get to relax fully and instead have me here, annoying you.”

“Darling, the last thing you could ever be accused of being is annoying. No, trust me. Through the years, I have had some annoying bedmates and you don’t even register on the scale.”

Paige turned to look at him. “Okay, I need to know what sort of madness you are referencing. Please tell me it is not just crazy-ex stories?”

“No, all the madness of this job. There was a time during the Thor, Ragnarok tour that I slept on the sofa part of a small airplane groin to ass with Taika Waititi.” She snorted in laugher at that. “Then there was a time when I went away with the college drama society and I drank myself into a stupor, as did everyone else, because, of course, you know…”

“Par for the course.”

“Exactly. Well, I woke up the next day, close to death, in Edinburgh.”

“Where did you start?”

“Manchester.”

Paige laughed but shook her head. “Not the worst.”

“Really? Look, I know I was out of college the time of that infamous urban myth of the Cambridge drama society weekend but this, at least, was real.”

“So was the Cambridge DramSoc weekend,” Paige argued.

“No it wasn’t,” Tom scoffed before he realised her face was entirely stoic. “Was it?”

“Friday afternoon, drinks in the college bar, three am, I am wandering around Amsterdam looking for a place to crash for the night and ringing my Dad to give me his credit card number so I can stay in a hostel with a few of my mates,” Paige informed him.

“Fuck off.” Tom became far more animated at her admitting such. “How did you all get there, what the Hell were you all doing?”

“So, drinking, obviously. And then Brianna, the Soc secretary started giving out that she never got onto the continent, so Piotr, one of the exchange students was saying how England knew how to drink, but the Netherlands knew how to party, and to this day, I have no idea who suggested he put his money where his mouth was but somehow, I am giving my date of birth and associated details to Jack, our society chair and getting a fucking flight from London to Schipol. Cheap EU flights were a dangerous thing.”

“But...We always thought…”

“You thought wrong.”

Tom stared at her in disbelief. “And that bastard had the audacity to accuse you of being boring?”

“Because I was young and stupid when I was young; when it came time to consider being a responsible adult, I was actually looking forward to being such. I had my ridiculous time, I had time to figure me out and what I wanted, and now I get to do exactly that, whatever that entails. Hence why I am not ever bothered too greatly by silly things.”

“You are to be commended,” Tom commented. “If not slightly mental, Amsterdam?”

“We ended up staying the weekend, it was lovely.”

“You are insane.”

“And proudly so.” Yawning slightly, Paige turned and started to settle to go to sleep.

Tom, taking her cue, did similar, laying back and reading a little before trying to get comfortable himself, not wanting to keep her awake with his reading or light.

Through the night, neither slept much. Both facing the opposite wall to one another, their backs almost touching and the heat of the other clear to feel. They both moved very little through the night, both conscious of the other behind them, not certain if the other was awake but both thinking the exact same thing, if they should say anything of their feelings to the other. Not crippled by the fear of their past experience and the rejection of one they loved.

*

The next day was as most every wedding was. Nothing overly exciting in the grander scheme of things. Paige joked and smiled with Fiona through the times she was required to assist in her bridesmaid's duties but the rest of the time she stayed close to Tom, knowing how awkward it was to be a plus one at an event and nothing was worse than being one at a place where you knew no one else.

When Tom bumped into Mark during the evening, both of them in good humour and a couple of drinks in. Mark embraced him as Tom congratulated him.

"I spent too long farting about. I should have asked her ages ago. I was lucky. Not everyone is as lucky. Take you, for example, farting around Paige."

Tom looked around, slightly worried that they would be overheard.

"Taking so long to ask Paige out, I mean, I thought I was bad." Mark kept his comments fairly vague purposely and Tom noted such too.

"I…"

"No, really. Not realising she felt the same and whatnot. If it wasn't heartbreaking to watch, then it would have been hilarious."

Tom frowned.

"I better get back to my wife, Jesus, it's odd calling her that." There was a surprised smile on Mark's face at his small revelation. "And you better get back to Paige, especially if Carol is about. She likes to try and get her claws into other women's partners if they are dumb enough to allow her to or try and imply she did with the ones that decline her and the added thing where she would brag you more than others and probably more publicly too. Honestly, I don't know you deal this sort of shit."

"It's sadly par for the course with my life these days. Honestly, I never thought it would come to this. It's a tad overwhelming, even for me," Tom sighed rubbing the back of his neck. "It's not fair to expect others to endure that for me."

"Yet when someone loves you, then endure it willingly."

Tom said nothing as Mark slapped him playfully on the chest before saying his farewells and heading back to find Fiona.

Tom thought over his words for a moment, both of how Mark felt that perhaps Paige could feel something more got him but also of the madness that was his life and how it was wrong to expect anyone to endure that for him, when he spent so much time working and knowing she would forever have to concern herself with wondering if he would do as her ex had done and cheat on her. She tried to act as though it didn't bother her but there was no denying she had been affected by it. It would never be fair to expect her to endure his work life.

He went back to Paige who was talking with her parents. He had to remind himself that this was all a charade when he wanted nothing more than to show her the affection he so desperately wished to bestow on her. While he sat with her and her parents, he felt as though it was organic, that there was no falseness to how they interacted, making it all the harder when he had to remind himself that her smiles and other acts of affection were merely put on.

When the wedding had come to a close and time came to rest, they bid farewell to her brother, her now sister-in-law and her parents before going back to their shared room.

“Thank you.” Tom glanced at Paige as she walked out of the bathroom in her nightclothes. “For coming to this. You really are incredible and the greatest company. I will be lost when you go to New York.”

Tom swallowed as he thought of the soon-to-be future. “I know the feeling. I will miss our talks.”

“Just remember, I am often reachable if you want to talk. If I go into a writing flow though, please don’t hold it against me.”

“How is the book going?”

“It isn’t.”

“Oh, everything alright?”

Paige could not answer immediately, to say things were fine was a barefaced lie, to say no opened her to admit that she had a countdown on her wall to the day he was leaving and when she looked at it, it made her feel like she was shot in the stomach to think he would leave and she would be alone again. “Writing inspiration comes and goes. I simply have to embrace whatever happens.” It took more than she was willing to admit to keep her voice steady as she said the second sentence. It was as much about the current situation as it was about her writing. Feeling her throat get tight, she cleared it and went to her side of the bed.

Tom, sensing the tension, went into the bathroom to ready himself for bed. When he came back out, having decided to try and speak about what Mark had said and with the few drinks he had giving him courage, he looked at Paige but noticed her even breathing and thought her to be asleep.

As he got into his side of the bed, Paige did everything in her power to keep her breathing steady as she willed her tears to stay at bay.