#tango hooves

[makolokgneh]

so... I have some stuff waiting

I was learning about the tango being a battle for the lead... I couldn't resist... here u go

[p---l---c]

The Algorithm of Daedalus

[slugsinsuits]

Love the idea that in universe fanon changes the way the Minecraft people look. Doc wakes up in crocs one day, nods, smiles, and carries on. He's a little less reserved when he wakes up a quadruped, but it's kind of cool.

Jimmy, meanwhile, wakes up with fledgling wings after Last life. They take a while to fledge, and he thinks the colour might change. The whims of the universe are odd, after all. No. He wakes after Double life with the bright yellow feathers that had grown in throughout the sessions, and cries for the soulmate he lost. No longer does he hear whispers across worlds. No, now he can tell before someone dies. Never enough to prevent it, only enough for it to hurt. He sees Tango again and tastes death on his soul fire hair.

Some people change by their dream. Gem, for instance, is equally comfortable with horns and hooves or with butterfly wings.

Grian sobs as his wings, once a relief, brightly coloured and so, so different to the monochrome of the downside up, give way once more to purples. Tears fall from a thousand eyes forced open, watching.

Joe is delighted when, for a brief month, he sees through rainbow eyes. They fade, but turn up on Tuesdays and Rain days.

Cleo sighs the first time her arm falls off, and searches for Grian for sewing advice, remembering a disconcerting era of plastic eyes and floppy bodies.

Some folk barely notice. What's the difference between being something that looks like a normal guy but isn't, and being a normal guy? Aesthetically, not much. Sometimes, they can't tell until they smile and people flinch, until they take their helmet off and choke, until the disguise they painted for themself refuses to come off.

Zedaph, comfortably a sheep, wakes up in bed disoriented after a particularly surprising shrieker stack. The potential consequence of a shock to prey animals hadn't occured to him before... It would make a great Zedvancement.

[hermitcraftheadcanons]

Every so often, the server hosts a "group care day", where everyone gets together to help look after each other's needs. After all, they're a varied group of creatures, and it helps to have a pack/flock/etc looking after you! Some of the mainstay parts of the day are:

- Preening the avians (you get to keep any feathers that come out while you're preening, which Cleo finds very helpful);

- Repainting faces (usually Grian the doll and Cleo the rotting corpse);

- Playing fetch with Ren (everyone gets a turn!);

- Cleaning dirt, stones and other debris out of hooves;

- Helping Gem to shed her antlers when necessary;

- Helping the Convex to acquire things to offer to their Vex masters so that they can keep their powers (the Vex love the variety of offerings they get from the boys);

- Prosthetic maintenance/upgrades;

- Making sure that the redstoners are taking their anti-redstone poisoning meds (many of them keep forgetting to take them);

- Mental health check-ins (how has Bdubs been with plants? How are Tango and Grian doing with their rabbit phobias? Anyone in a bad way gets a free Jellie snuggle session);

Add more, if you like!

Making sure nobody is overworking themselves too much (Impulse-)

Shearing Zedaph, when necessary

Plenty of hugs and occasionally a cuddle pile

-Mod Mleem

[amethystfairy1]

AWHHH I LOVE HOW DOC CALLS TANGO LITTLE SPARK ITS SO CUTE‼️‼️

DOES DOC HAVE NICKNAMES FOR ANYONE ELSE??? IF SO I WOULD LOVE TO KNOW THEM!!

I'm so glad you like it!!!

Doc calls pretty much all of his 'little ones' some variant on the term 'little ___" and then proceeds to make fun of them when they complain as adults because no, none of them are taller than him yet.

Tango is little spark.

The avians are littles ones/little birds/pesky birds depending on how well behaved they've been.

Ren is little pup, Lizzie is little fluff, Mumbo is little shadow, Joel is little huff (because he gets angry about pet names, and has done so since he was ten, and Doc finds it hilarious)

Shelby is little witch (he started calling her that even before she had become a witch, when she was still a kid just dreaming of managing to become a witch, so it's very cute that her dream came true)

Gem is little hooves, and Impulse is 'the bright one' (he somehow dodged the 'little' moniker which everyone is incredibly jealous of him for)

And, of course, Doc calls Etho 'sweetheart'. ❤️

[theminecraftbee]

The problem is, Bdubs can't stop thinking about it, and it's starting to drive him a little insane. "It", here, being the expression of terror on Joe's face, entirely caused by Bdubs, before he realized what was actually going on, and by unable to stop thinking about it, Bdubs means it's haunting him, but not even the scared kind of haunting. The haunting of--

Alright. Back up. So. Normal enough to be a little into the mild suffering of your fellow hermit. That's half the point of Decked Out. Some temporary murder, some ribbing, heck, there's even footage sometimes! And it's not as though, Bdubs thinks, that too many people think weirdly of Tango for watching. For making the game. Really, there's nothing wrong with it!

Nothing wrong with imagining, hey, what if Joe had actually been right to be frightened, and hey, wouldn't it have been nice if he'd actually had the heavy hooves and powerful jaw of the beast he was pretending to be, and could just--

Right. Anyway, Joe got a refund, and Bdubs, he was like, super helpful. The most helpful. A ravager lackey! Joe did die in the end, but it was to vex while Bdubs wasn't even looking! Wasn't his fault. The emotion Bdubs feels about that totally isn't disappointment, because that would be weird. That'd be...

Oh, who's he kidding here, huh? He wishes he'd actually been one of the ravagers. Why else would he be unable to stop thinking about it?

And now he's sitting outside of Decked Out, squinting at the thing. Distantly, he can hear the sound of the dungeon, active. Tango's probably somewhere in there, playing with wires and cackling at whoever running's misfortune, the lucky bastard. And there's--whichever stupid ravagers are in there right now. And they're stupid! Way too stupid to be real threats. Someone smarter, now that could take out Etho! Hah, imagine that! If Bdubs got to take down Etho, or Hypno, or...

Or...

"That stupid prank went messing with my head," mutters Bdubs. "Being a ravager is a stupid idea. This is stupid. I'm going to yell at Tango, for being stupid."

He shudders, for some reason, as he passes over the threshold of the dungeon. Something settles over him.

It won't leave his head.

It won't leave his head.

What if?

He still has the hat. If he uses the back way Tango showed him, it's not like anyone would know, right?

"And those are stupid ideas and how I get possessed," mutters Bdubs, but he doesn't move, and he doesn't stop thinking about it until Gem comes to mock him about being too scared to go in, and he has performative bravery to distract him instead.

(What if? What if? What if?)

[activate-shadow-of-the-window]

Playing around with colored pencils and horizons designs I haven’t taken past the ‘tiny faceless figure in a pile of other tiny figures’ stage.

Commander X(isumavoid) is… no one knows, really. They only appear as a moving suit of complete armor, covered from head to toe to fingertips, with the Dragon Skull Crown full of darkness as a head.

Tango Tek is part blaze, part stray, part human. Fiery hair, a left eye like a blaze rod and a right eye clouded with cataracts, the mark of the undead, has the King of the Basalt Throne.

Doc Mk-77 is a faerie? Probably a faerie. Goat horns, hooves, and ears, butterfly wings, mechanical body parts, and the Deepfang Crown.

False Symmetry is a human. Pale and shadowy is the Lady of the Darkwood Throne.

Duchess Cleo is a zombie. Orange-eyed and haired is the Everfrost Throne’s occupant.

Bee Double Oh (Bdubs for short) is a faerie, something like a glare. Short of stature and loud of voice and personality is the Lord of the Moss Throne.

[neobendium]

Tango day!!!!! I think this is the one I had the most fun designing. I'm still not super confident in my ability to do fire, so I made his hair a little bit more solid and gave him a weird dye job instead and honestly I think it worked out. Don't ask me what kind of hybrid he is. I just think he should have hooves.

[jockw]

Choose your fighter!

Pluto; “Unlucky Chat Noir”

With big sized paws, he'll knock his opponent and stun him momentarily for 5 seconds! Never mess with this kitty cat, he'll surely scratch you up and down.

Attack: Scratch

Alt: Power Claws

Annabel Lee; “Death Bride”

(ignore the paw)

As she floats above the souls, she seeks for her partner for life. Having no desire in anything else, she'll freeze everything to death.

Attack: Flower Rush

Alt: Death's Kiss

Montresor: “Hell's Lagoon”

From the depths of Hell itself, he was banished from the lands of life, causing chaos. Even Lucifer himself couldn't handle it. Without his golden chains around him, his status is lowered.

Attack: Hooves

Alt: Devil's Tango

[scribbling-dragon]

Forced Acquisition of a Child

summary:

“Jimmy,” he holds the baby awkwardly, gripping it under the arms. The blanket unravels a little, trailing below but not quite touching the floor. He’s never held a baby. He should never be trusted to hold a baby, and yet, somehow, here he is. “Why have you got a baby.”

“fWhip gave it to me,” Jimmy continues to look and sound the most distressed Tango has ever seen him, and Tango was there for the Train Incident. They still don’t have an explanation for how it appeared overnight, but Jimmy is too scared to remove it. Like the train tracks might summon another train if he does. “And then he just left.”

-

Or: Jimmy "doesn't know" how to take care of babies, and Tango doesn't know how to take care of babies.

(ao3 link)

(masterpost)

(2,185 words)

“But what am I meant to do with it?” He tries not to sound too distressed, but even he can hear how terribly he fails at that, voice coming out higher pitched and squeakier than he intends. He’s never beating the toy allegations. The baby he’s hold at arm's length looks rather content, only wriggling slightly as Jimmy continues to stare at it.

He doesn’t think it’s blinked once.

“I dunno,” fWhip is already walking away, shrugging and not even looking back at Jimmy. “Your problem now, don’t kill it, yeah? Alright, bye!”

“Oh my god,” he looks back at the baby he’s holding. He doesn’t even know how to hold a baby. He’s pretty sure there’s a specific way you’re meant to do it though. He’s not suited for this; he can keep the cats content, easy, they’re cats. If they’re not happy they go a kill something to keep themselves happy. Or they run to Tango so they can use him as a heating pad. Cats are simple, in that they practically take care of themselves. All he needs to remember to do is feed them and shower them in love and affection.

He's never even seen a child this small before. Are children meant to be this small? Do they normally emerge from rocks, is that how it works? It doesn’t seem like the way it should work, but he also doesn’t know enough on the topic to dispute it. He never thought to ask before, but maybe he should have. He really, really should have.

He thinks. Doing his best, at least, as the baby continues to stare at him. Unblinking.

It’s like having a mini-fWhip at arm’s length, judging his every move. Which…actually isn’t far off what the normal fWhip does. Enjoys doing, whichever. But he does normally blink a little more than this. Did fWhip have a staring problem as a baby? He can’t picture fWhip as a baby; he’d always assumed the goblin just sprung from the earth fully formed, or something. He rests a hand over the baby’s eyes, shifting his grip on it so it’s cradled in the crook of his elbow.

God, he knows nothing about children. This is such a horrific idea. Whose idea was it in the first place? Right, yeah, adoption program. It just sounds like a way of foisting childcare onto the other empires because fWhip can’t be bothered to deal with it.

He can think a little clearer now that the baby isn’t staring at him, judging his every move. He keeps his hand firmly pressed over their eyes, but not hard enough to do any damage. He thinks. He doesn’t even know how to hold a baby! He’s doing his best.

Never mind, just…think.

Think. Who would be able to help with this? The other empires have their own goblin children to deal with, and he doesn’t even want to know what some of them are doing to these unfortunate children that have, somehow, managed to end up in their care.

What smart people does he know that have good, well-rounded, and applicable life skills? He knows a lot of people. Not many of them are well-adjusted to normal life, meaning he can easily disregard over half of the people he knows.

He spins on the spot as epiphany strikes him, hooves clattering loudly over the stone as he realises he already has an answer, a remedy to all of his problems: Tango.

 === === ===

 Tango hummed quietly to himself as he moved back and forth, tail flicking behind him as he rearranged a few more of the files. It’s not one of his favourite tasks, mainly because Jimmy seems unable to agree on a standard filing system, making everything they have impossible to find in a hurry because it’s in some arbitrary place that made sense at the time.

It’s been a slow process of gradually rearranging everything into a proper system without Jimmy noticing. And also repositioning the documents he puts in the now incorrect places. He had thought by organising it he’d find the system behind Jimmy’s madness. But there is nothing. There is no system. Jimmy loses his files regularly, and then they have to hunt around for them because he managed to remember a tiny detail that means they’ll be able to take one of the local bandits to a proper court and go through proper legal proceedings.

The door crashes open behind him, swinging back into the wall (he’s been meaning to put a doorstop in so that can stop happening. He’s had to repair that wall three times in the past two weeks. It’s getting tiring). He winces at the resounding crash, flinching back from where his hands are in their filing cabinet, still holding one of their thinner files.

“Tango!”

“Jimmy,” he turns around with a smile, relaxing a little as his voice registers to Tango’s ears. “You scared me for a moment there, I thought there was a problem.”

“There is a problem!” Jimmy’s across the room in a moment, looking unusually distressed and cradling something in his arms. “Look!”

And the bundle is thrust unceremoniously into his arms, leaving him fumbling to balance the file and the surprisingly heavy object he’s been given. “Um,” he says, intelligently.

“What am I meant to do with it?”

Tango isn’t even sure what it is yet, so he ignores the question in favour of peeling the blanket back and looking at the thing underneath. A pair of eyes stare back at him, bright blue and unblinking. Right. Alright. That’s a thing.

“Jimmy,” he holds the baby awkwardly, gripping it under the arms. The blanket unravels a little, trailing below but not quite touching the floor. He’s never held a baby. He should never be trusted to hold a baby, and yet, somehow, here he is. “Why have you got a baby.”

“fWhip gave it to me,” Jimmy continues to look and sound the most distressed Tango has ever seen him, and Tango was there for the Train Incident. They still don’t have an explanation for how it appeared overnight, but Jimmy is too scared to remove it. Like the train tracks might summon another train if he does. “And then he just left.”

Right. Goblin King…gave Jimmy a baby goblin. He’s pretty sure goblins just naturally emerge from the stone of their caves, but that doesn’t explain why Jimmy has now come to be in possession of a baby. Even less so why fWhip specifically took the time out of his day to give the baby to Jimmy.

He grimaces at the small creature, more than a little unnerved by the fact that it hasn’t blinked yet.

“And you gave it to me, why?” He holds the baby a little further away from himself, attempting to give it back to Jimmy. Jimmy steps backwards, tripping over his own hooves, and fumbling to catch himself on the edge of the desk. He succeeds in catching himself on Tango’s desk, simultaneously succeeding in disturbing the piles of paper he had spent the morning organising. “I don’t like children.”

“You're smart, you know what to do with a child, right?”

“I might have been a bandit but I never kidnapped a child.” The baby reaches a hand towards his face, grabbing hold of some of his hair and yanking. Tango grimaces at the feeling, pulling his head back to try and avoid the small fists. “I had standards. And a limit on where my patience ends.”

“I wasn’t saying you would, Red,” Jimmy frowns at him. Tango huffs a laugh from his nose, and he watches as Jimmy’s frown deepens. “You were being mean, alright. Nevermind, I don’t think you have any standards. Your standards are terrible.”

“And what does that say about you?”

“That you're lucky to have me.”

The baby makes a small sound, reaching for his hair again. He should have cut it ages ago, should have ignored Jimmy when he said that he liked it. Sure, being able to braid his hair is an added bonus that he gets to enjoy on a morning when Jimmy does it for him, but it’s not worth this. He’s going to have to wash his hair later.

“Did you date fWhip at some point,” he asks.

Jimmy stares at him. “What?” He sounds like he’s either about to start laughing or crying.

“Just,” he gestures helplessly, movements slightly hindered by the baby in his arms. “Babies normally come from a relationship. Or maybe he just really hates you.” The baby makes another grab for his face, aiming for his ear this time. “Just- take the baby, it’s not mine.”

Jimmy almost drops the baby, but manages to catch it quickly enough that it is as though nothing happened. He then cradles the baby in one arm, balancing it perfectly and easily. He looks at the baby, then back at Jimmy, then at the baby again. The baby looks perfectly content, like it might fall asleep.

“It’s not mine either!” Jimmy’s protest is loud enough that Tango worries they might be interrupted by some concerned citizen. He’s not sure how either of them would explain the baby that is very clearly a goblin.

“Alright,” he leans back against the cabinet behind him. “Let’s take this from the top. How did you go from having a meeting with the emperors to acquiring a child.”

“It was part of the meeting.”

“It was part of the meeting,” he repeats. “Alright. Why was it part of the meeting?”

“Because…fWhip got the crown, meaning he got to make a rule. And he wanted…all of us to take care of a goblin child. Like an adoption program.”

“And you just agreed?”

“Uh, yeah?” He’s pretty sure the baby has just fallen asleep. He’s heard Jimmy, several times, protest that he doesn’t know how to deal with children, let alone look after them. He sleeps in the same bed as a liar, apparently. “He has the crown right now.”

“And this crown is all-powerful, is it? All, wow, look at me, I'm so powerful and great and you must listen to my rules?”

“Only one rule.”

“That’s not the point, dear.” He sighs. “Is the crown magical?”

“Maybe?” Jimmy shrugs. “I haven’t been able to get my hands on it yet, but it’s old. Pix found it in a ruin.”

“And his first instinct was to make a game with it? This old and potentially evil crown that might be able to…I don’t know- it might do something!”

“I didn’t think about it very much!” Jimmy protests, still looking at him with his sad eyes. Those eyes stopped working around the time that he figured out Jimmy practiced them in front of a mirror to manipulate him. “This is why you need to come to these meetings with me.”

“No.” He ignores Jimmy’s still sad eyes. “I went for a few, and that was it. You’ll have to tie me up and drag me through the door to get me there.”

“I'm not doing that.”

“Which is why I suggested it,” he smiles. “Now, what you're going to do is take the baby back to Gobland, and we can pretend all of this never happened.”

“But I can’t.”

“Why.” He taps a finger against the cabinet behind him. It isn’t an impatient move, just something he does when he’s thinking hard. He’s calculating, right now, how much work he’ll be able to do while Jimmy returns the baby. He might even be able to finish organising the cabinet. And then he can relax.

“Because of the rule.”

“Alright,” he sighs. “How do you make the rule stop…being in effect.”

“You steal the crown.”

“Well,” he claps his hands together. “Fantabulous, you’ve got your solution. Get him while he’s least expecting it.”

“That’s not a word.”

“Yes it is,” he lies through his teeth. He doesn’t know if it’s a word. Half the words he says aren’t words. It doesn’t matter, they convey his emotions well enough. “Take the baby back to the Goblands.”

“But what if it gets hurt?”

“Bigger chance of it getting hurt with us taking care of it.” He reasons. “I regularly catch on fire. If the cats didn’t land on their feet, you’d have dropped one of them on their head at this point.”

“Harsh.”

“But true,” he presses a kiss to Jimmy’s cheek as he walks past. “If you're quick we might be able to go for an early dinner at Chromia.”

“We’ll go there anyway,” Jimmy grumbles half-heartedly. “It’s a Tuesday. You and Scott have your weird little competition.”

“You love it really.” He calls over his shoulder, already occupying himself again. He prefers doing something to sitting around idly. “Have fun returning the child!” Jimmy doesn’t respond, but he does shut the door gently behind him. Doesn’t make up for the hole in the wall (Tango almost managed to forget about that), but the thought is appreciated.

Jimmy is fantastic, but if he comes back with another child Tango might just kill him.

[evilrat-sabre]

Never look a gift horse in the mouth or so the saying says. A bunch of bullshit if you ask Bdubs, he has some very colorful words to say to the IDIOT that said this for the first time.

Bdubs just looked at the literal gifted horse in the mouth and it frickin exploded.

The short player is thrown across his half mansion shared yard by the impact of the explosion, he stays there for the exact amount of three seconds. Then looking at the 4 smoking hooves of what one day was a horse, he gets up and looks stupidly at his neighbor. He raises his charred eyebrows and asks with the most leveled voice he could muster.

"Doc. WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED TO THAT HORSE?!"

The creeper cyborg shrugs looking amused.

"Idk what youre talking man. The horse looks fine to me."

He points at the horse that is indeed looking very fine, the white stallion is peacefully eating some wheat, acting like he wasn't just a bunch of charred remains some second ago.

"HOW?!? DOC WHa" Bdubs tries to get close to the horse, but it explodes again when the player tries to touch it.

"The wonders of bioengineering my friend!." The honestly crazy scientist explains happily "I put my Zedaph IOU to good use, if you understand what I am saying." He says giggly, winking his organical eye at Bdubs

"Well, have fun neighbor!"

The creeper hybrid enters his half part of the mansion leaving Bdubs alone to take care of the explosive horse.

…

Bdoubleo100 was blown up by Zed and Doc's totally not explosive horse.

<VintageBeef> You okay there?

<Tango> Zed what did you do?

<Zedaph> science!

<Docm77> vengeance.

<Bdoubleo100> doc committed crimes against nature again.

[rhapsoddity]

hey rhaps, I may be being dumb brain here but in ass!skizz au, are ZITS human or are they funky lil creature guys?? also (you don't have to answer if you don't want to but I'm gonna ask anyways), of the G4 era MLP characters, who would ZITS have as their favourite??

Humans! There some variation (Skizz has pointed ears off the top of my head) but there's minimal fantasy elements in the au

Skizz - derpy/ditzy hooves

Tango - rainbow dash

Impy - pinkie pie

Zed - Discord

[cielcreations]

Hazbin Hermits - Prologue

AN: Hermitcraft/Empires/3rd Life Series X Hazbin Hotel AU.

Meaning lots of cursing, fighting, blood, violence, flirting, shipping, sexual innuendos/implied sexual content, and pretty much everyone is a bad person to some degree.

If you don't like your favorite characters made to be not so great people, then do not read.

"Good afternoon! I'm Katherine Killjoy!"

"And I'm Joey JaxHammer! Chaos outside pentagram city today, as a turf war is raging on the west side between notable kingpins Lord Fwhip and self-proclaimed spunky powerhouse Mythical Sausage!"

"That's right Joey! After the recent extermination, many areas are now up for grabs! Demons all over Hell are already duking it out to gain new territory!"

"Those two seem to be really going at it, huh?"

"Looks like they're fighting tooth and nail for that hotspot!"

"And I'd like to nail their hotspots, am I right, fellas~?"

"Haha, you are a limp dick jackass, Joey! Or should I say-" Katherine poured her hot coffee on his lap, the man hissing and moving before she could actually spill it on his dick, "-no dick?"

"Bitch." The man hissed.

"Coming up next, we have an exclusive interview with the younger son of Hell's own head honcho, who's here to discuss his brand-new passion project!"

"All that, after the break!" Joey exclaimed, taking his mug and pouring his coffee on Katherine's head.

"YOU LITTLE SH-"

The two looked away from the TV. The blue haired demon tugged the tie a bit tighter, just to make the prince look more presentable.

"Okay." He finished, stepping back, "Are you ready? You remember what to say?"

The blonde took a deep breath, his purple eyes widening in excitement as he exclaimed, "Yes! Let's do this!"

"Just, look at me, and I'll mouth it to you, Zed." The man grabbed the prince's shoulders.

Zed had light blonde hair with brown ram horns, pale skin, wearing a black suit with a red tie, no shoes so his hooves could breath.

"Ugh, come ooooon, Tango, I know what to say!" Zed reassured, smiling, "But, I do think we should make it a bit more interesting! I-I mean, I don't want to go up there and sound robotic, you know?"

Tango, normally, had yellow hair, that could change into different colors depending on how hot he got. Since he could control fire and such, his hair would change colors to match the fire type and, sometimes, it could even turn on fire. His skin was pale with a bit of a blue tint, his nails sharpened into claws. He wore a black crop top and black shorts, long black heeled boots. He also had black belts wrapped around his waist with golden buckles, black cloth to create an overskirt. (Art of Tango by @/lunarcrown)

"I get that, babe, but this is serious." Tango reminded him, "You can't go up there and squeal and giggle the whole time. It's adorable, yes, but not all sinners are going to trust and believe in your project unless you look serious and you know what you're doing."

"I told you through a fit of excited squeals."

"Yeah, and I listened because I know and believe in you." The demon motioned to the others, "These sinners don't. They don't know you, they barely know your older brother, and they certainly won't believe in you at first. It's why you gotta go up there, show them who's in charge, and act like this plan is full-proof!"

"But we don't know if it is..." Zed reminded.

"Your right, and neither do they." Tango booped his nose, "Which is our advantage. No one knows if this works, but if we act like we're the experts, people believe."

"Prince Zedaph? Five minutes before we're live." A demon called.

Tango smiled at the blonde, kissing his forehead, "You got this! I'll be right behind the camera, so if you need me?"

Zed nodded, smiling, "Don't worry, I got this!"

He turned around, walking to the desk and smiling, offering his hand, "Hi, I'm Zed-"

"Katherine Killjoy." The female anchor hissed, "You can put that away. I would say it's a pleasure to meet you, but that would be a lie." She then sneered, "Look, my time is money, so I'll keep this short. You're not here because we wanted you here. You're here because Jeffery couldn't make it to his cannibal cooking segment! You may be some royal bigshot, but that doesn't mean shit to me! I'm too rich and influential to giving a flying fuck about some tux wearing demon 'prince'-" (she put "prince" in quotations, as if Zed wasn't one) "-wants to advertise."

Zed narrowed his eyes, "Listen-"

Katherine leaned forward, glaring, "So don't get cute with me, or I'll fucking break you!"

"And we're live!"

Katherine zoomed to her seat, tilting her head so much, it sounded like she broke it, "Welcome back!" Once Zed was sat down, she spoke again, "So, Zedaph!"

The blonde's eyes twitched as he smiled awkwardly, "It's Zed-"

"Whatever! Tell us about this new passion project you've been insistently pestering our news station about!"

"Welllllll..." Zed looked around at the demons, Tango standing by the camera man with a smile and thumbs up. He smiled and took a deep breath as he spoke, "As most of you know, I was born here in Hell and growing up, I tried to see the good in everything around me. Hell is my home and you are my people. We just went through another extermination and we lost so many souls! It breaks my heart seeing my people being slaughtered every year!" He slammed his fist on the table, sighing, "No one is even given a chance and I can no longer stand idly by when the place I call home, the place I love, is constantly being destroyed!"

He stood up, smiling, "So, I've been thinking, isn't there a more humane way to hinder Hell's overpopulation? Perhaps we can find a new alternative way to save souls through redemption? I think yes, and that's what this project aims to achieve! Ladies and gentlemen and everyone in between, I'm opening the first of its kind! A hotel that rehabilitates sinners!"

Everyone was silent, staring at the man.

Everyone outside stared at the TV.

One in particular tilted his head in curiosity.

Everyone in the news station... started laughing.

Zed shrunk in on himself as Tango moved to stand beside him, his blue hair turning into flames as he glared at everyone.

"What in the nine circles makes you think a single person in hell would give two shits about becoming a 'better person?!'" Katherine cackled, "You have no proof that this actually works and you want people to be good just because?!"

"You have no proof it doesn't work!" Tango hissed, flames surrounding his body, "Besides, we already have a patron who's showing incredible improvement!"

"Ooooooh, and who might that be~?" Katherine sneered.

Tango leaned forward, intentionally burning her wooden table with a smirk, "Oh, just someone named, SmallishBeans."

"The pornstar?" Joey asked.

"You fucking would, Joey." Katherine glared before snickering, "In any case, that's hardly an accomplishment! I'm sure you can get that hooker to do anything with enough lube and sugar!"

Tango continued to burn her table, the woman looking ready to scratch his eyes out as he drew little doodles, "I beg to differ."

Zed also perked up, smirking, "He's been behaved, clean, and out of trouble for two weeks now!"

"Breaking news!"

Katherine perked up before she smirked, pushing the men away, "We just received word that a new player has entered the ongoing turf war! Let's go to the live feed!"

They turned to the TV and Tango pinched his temples as he tried to control himself, Zed muttering out, "Oh shit."

"Oh shit, indeed!" Katherine exclaimed, "It appears the one to join is none other than porn actor Joel, aka, SmallishBeans!" She looked at the two, "What a juicy coincidence! I bet you feel real stupid right now! How does it feel to be a total and utter failure?!"

She began laughing, everyone did, once more.

Tango tried to control himself as Zed clenched his fists.

The prince looked at Tango with glowing red eyes, "Fucking, show them who's boss."

Tango smirked, his teeth sharpening to points, "Gladly."

He jumped across the table, lighting everything on fire as he began to beat Katherine and Joey.

***

The prince and his boyfriend sat in a limo, across from the other sinner. The sinner had brown hair with a green streak in the middle of his hair, matching his green eyes and green antenna. He wore a long white and light green suit blazer, the top unbuttoned and showing off his muscular chest. He had black shorts and long, knee length black heeled boots. To top it off, he had green transparent fairy wings on his back.

They watched as he rolled the window up and down, clearly in his own little world. Eventually, he seemed to notice the two were staring at him.

The brunette stopped, leaned back, and shrugged, "What?"

"'What?' 'WHAT?!'" Tango screamed, his hair turning to blue, almost purple flames, "WHAT WERE YOU THINKING, JOEL?!"

"Ugh, I had too, I owed Sausage a solid!" Joel huffed, "Isn't that one of those 'redeeming qualities'? Helping friends and all that?!"

Zed leaned into the window with a groan as Tango reprimanded him, "Not in turf wars that result in genocide?!"

"Meh, you win some, you loose a few hundred!"

"Joel, that was really not cool." Zed groaned, "You just... You made us look like jokes!"

"Nah, chill out, jokes are funny! I made you all look sad and pathetic!"

"Oh, cause that's any better?!" Tango growled.

"Look, I had to!" Joel argued, "My reputation was on the line! You know what people would say if they found out I was trying to go clean?! Not to mention, people would know where I am and try to break into the hotel to get some of me! Do you want a whole mob down there?"

"Listen, if you want to stay here, you need to take this shit seriously!" Tango demanded, walking towards the brunette, "We're not going to give you a free room, free food, free whatever else if all you do is fuck around! So, you either sit down, buckle the fuck up, and try to redeem yourself and help the hotel's reputation, that you burned to cinder!" He glared, flames coming out of his mouth, "Got it?"

Joel groaned, "Okay, fine, whatever."

"C-Calm down, Tango." Zed offered his hand, Tango moving to sit beside him again, "I-It's not over yet, we can still try! It'll be okay!"

The limo stopped at the hotel and the three went inside. Tango flopped on the couch with a groan, Joel grabbing a popsicle and sitting in a chair. Zed groaned and went to go upstairs, only to stop.

Someone knocked on the door.

He walked towards it and opened the door.

In front of him stood a tall dirty blonde man with his eyes closed, wearing a blue striped coat with dark blue sleeves, the coat falling to his knees. Underneath the coat, he wore a white dress shirt with a black upside down cross on the chest, as if to resemble a tie, long black dress pants with bright blue cuffs. Over his feet, he wore black heeled boots that rested under his pants. Behind his back, he held a long thin cane with a sentient vintage style microphone attached to it.

The whole time, he smiled.

Zed shrunk a little as the man opened his eyes. He had black sclera with blue eyes, staring down at the prince.

"HELLO!" He spoke, his voice altered to sound like that of a broadcast.

Zed shut the door on instinct, "Uh, Tango?"

"Whaaaaat?" The flame demon groaned.

"The Radio Demon is at the door!"

[amethystfairy1]

I just need to know. For that little human group chat. Why is Zed A.S.S.?

Also, I’ve been reading both of your au’s since the beginning. They are by far my favorite fics. Any ideas for how to write more? I like writing but can never seem to sit down with a doc for long before getting frustrated.

It’s a reference to the Aerial Sheep Service! It’s a recurring bit of his that he always drags Tango into! I especially loved the return of A.S.S in season 9 with the sheep whose hooves could never touch the ground 😆

How to write more??? Oooooh that’s a great question let’s see…

Always write what you’re feeling. That’s why I do my AUs the way I do. Instead of writing a singular narrative long run story novel style (which I have done) this style of the series of shorter pieces that all fit into a timeline had made writing a lot of content SO MUCH EASIER!

Plus, I’ve got both TTSBC and TT! Very different stories, very different worlds with very different themes! It gives me all the range I could ever ask for! If I feel like writing action I’ve got superheroes! If I feel like writing fluffy romance I’ve got so many ships in TTSBC! If I wanna do something dark and angsty and whumpy TT is here to deliver! I’m very happy with the current set up because it gives me the freedom to bounce around.

I’d also say don’t be afraid of starting and then stopping if you aren’t feeling it. I’ve rewritten so much stuff, or ditched ideas entirely! If you’re feeling it in the moment, just WRITE IT. And then figure out where it can fit later. Also find music they inspired you! I can’t draw like at all but I love making up ‘animatics’ in my head to different songs for TTSBC and TT and sometimes the scenes I imagine get so vivid I just HAVE to write them!

Hopefully that helps you get scribbling! Have fun!!!

[votederpycausemufins]

I have been bitten by the Gemcyt bug caused by @chrisrin

I thus present to you Zedaph as Poudretteite as well as Worm Man as 'Pink Chalcedony' and a fusion of WM with @sweetest-honeybee 's Evil Xisuma design. (Mainly bc i had a better idea of a fusion btwn the two rather than with chrisrin's tango and impulse, but i might figure it out) Thanks for letting me use your design! It let me make Covelite!

And while there's some notes in the drawings, there shall be more below the cut!

Okay so I immediately jumped to Zed being a pink colored gem and stumbled upon a few options. I knew I wanted to pick 2, one to be Zed's gem and the other to be WM's supposed gem, and almost swapped their gem types before learning that there was a chalcedony on the show.

I think it is a fun thing to have Zed and WM insist they are totally not the same person (or gem in this case), and here we see that WM is shapeshifting the gem position around, and that could have worked... if it weren't blatantly obvious that he looks nothing like a chalcedony. I mean look at how close the different colored Pearls look, or Sapphire and Padparacha.

The base form I used for Zed is from a gem silhouette from 'The Answer', which was the only one to have those lil ball hands as the others had at least some semblance of regular hands. So I kept that detail and even made a joke about how Zed can still just pick stuff up, and that even carries over to the fusion

speaking of the fusion.

Other than a ZIT(S) fusion, the most obvious one is w/ Evil X. And I absolutely love Bee's design and brain went nyoom with it, expecially the fact that he's corrupted??? Hello???!??! We saw in the show w/ Jasper and one of the corrupted Jaspers fusing that it left remnants of the other's corruption on Jasper herself. I loved the idea that Zed could get lil sheep like horns post-first fusion with Evil X, so boom, it now exists.

(Also the lil spots carrying over makes it even more obvious Zed/WM are the same gem so haha lol)

As for the fusion itself, I saw that Evil X seemed to have dragon elements, and that fits perfectly w/ my personal headcanons of them being an ender dragon (hybrid), and then we have sheep hybrid zedaph, and what is a fluffy dragon? luck dragon!!!

The front legs are more dragon like, back legs more sheep like (claws and then hooves respectively) and then there is fluffy luck dragon tail! oh! and I had fun with making the mane of hair work as Evil X's fancy collar thing.

Their head is based a lot on Alexandrite's, with the two mouth thing going on. I thought it would go nicely with their concept and i think it works well.

And then other details! I used the distance models style to show off the past reformations of Zed and WM. Also slight drawing mistake, in the lil comic of WM showing off his new corruption marks, he should be in his 'Early s5' design (I'll prolly go back and fix it in the morning fixed 'n added Covelite's colors). I picture the first fusion btwn the two being an adaption of when EX trapped WM in prison, then reappeared being good now to help him escape, but they needed to fuse to do so. (Oh i also used the distance models to do a lil size comparison)

[galaxygermdraws]

I wanna hear more about the crack brothers skizz and Zedaph design wise

oh my 2 favorite Hermits. And just my favorite MCYTs.

So fun thing with my Skizz design is I recently gave him silly matching earrings with Impulse. I just think it’s cute. Also fun thing: I purposefully misinterpreted Skizz’s suit as a vest so I could give his design more contrast, and also because he strikes me as a vest guy. As a vest enjoyer myself I can say that. I’ve also begun drawing him with fingerless gloves, he used to also have bandages under them but he doesn’t really do that anymore

as for Zed. Oh my beloved. Fun fact I cannot draw: Zed’s hair deflates when he’s sad. Yes like Pinkie MLP. His lil curly hair (the one between his bangs) also changes with his emotions. Another fun detail is his uh. His hooves n horns are space colored. That’s bc I’m a Watcher Zed enjoyer and also a Void Zed enjoyer so he’s kind of both! But also a sheep!! His Voidy Bits actually match Tango’s Void arm. Which Zed gave to him. Also you’ll rarely see me draw Zed bleeding cause if he ever bled out enough he literally would just become separated from his body