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#tbh go check out their stuff it's good shit
yeehawpim · 11 months
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Inspired by @lacrimalis and their recent The Beast/Enoch fics on ao3, especially my dear yellow lantern 😊
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starbuckaroo · 3 months
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it’s rly funny to me that the bt ppl on my dash are like ‘wow the deleted henren scene proves Tommy is a gr8 dude and bt are so good for each other’ and the antis are like that but uno reverse and like
if that doesn’t just prove that maybe we don’t have enough screentime actually talking about the dude yet to say definitively then idk what will 😂 like…yall we are all just seeing what we want to see and then yelling in our echo chambers. maybe it doesn’t have to be so dire?
#idk I liked him a lot in 7.04/05 and then got some less good vibes from later episodes but like idk that’s my thing#and tbh I don’t know enough about the guy to be able to tell the difference between sarcasm and rudeness we just don’t know him well enough#like his screentime is so minuscule so far. so yeah idk! I don’t want him to be an asshole I want Buck’s first out queer relationship to be#a good one for him! but like maybe it won’t be idfk#bc the same meta I used to lap up about buck attracting folks who want him for the wrong reasons doesn’t yet *not* apply here. all we really#know so far is that Tommy REALLY liked Eddie and also likes Buck but like he thinks Buck is rly attractive#but in the beginning there was a lot of hope bc he knew right away about Eddie and Chris! and he gets the job! that’s like 75% of Buck’s#core personality lol. the rest is the rest of his family and his devotion to them and idk if Tommy gets or respects that yet but idk#he might! we literally don’t know yet.#I’m just cracking up here bc I have bt filtered coz for a while the ppl I followed were just sayin shit I wasn’t interested in#discourse-wise and like it wasn’t funny the way some of the anti stuff was idk sue me. but I didn’t unfollow anyone who wasn’t#being super rancid so I check in on how it’s going every once in a while and it’s rly funny how similar the posts are on both sides is all#some real weird lines got drawn and it’s a shame bc it was more fun when there was more exchange of ideas. sigh.#.txt
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anaalnathrakhs · 6 months
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i WILL show up to the trial day for the preparatory class tomorrow no matter how much i dont want to and after that i guarantee NOTHING
#broadcasting my misery#vent#this is a lie i guarantee i will keep tumbling through life appearing functional and melting down in the privacy of my own home afterwards#<- trying to jinx my naturally contrarian ass into taking care of myself for once#god i'm tired#i am. slightly peeved.#around 11am i was like ''i think i'm going to go home'' and my friend was like WHAT nooooooo what are you going to do at home anyway#and we ended up hanging out w another friend until fucking 4pm#and she was like oooooh guys i think i'm gonna go else i wont have energy tomorrow#haha bitch where was this mindset when i told you i was going to go home#i don't know why i keep like. telling people stuff like ''i'm [emotion] i'm going to [thing]''#and they just plan stuff w me anyway#and like. i can't decide for them what's important or not to them. so i make an effort and i participate to the best of my ability.#but it KEEPS HAPPENING#OVER AND OVER AND OVER AGAIN#it does not stop#i can barely keep the violent impulses down tbh i act like im on crack in public#bc if i dont walk around and spasm like an epileptic stray cat im gonna start giving in to the urge to dive under a bus or punch someone#i have nearly uncontrollable fits of hitting my head against walls when my entire life i was too chicken to do it despite trying to#i gained about fifteen to twenty fucking kilograms in the last three months#because i cannot fucking stop binging and EVERYBODY'S LIFE seems to revolve around food#my friends are incapable of hanging out without going to buy smth no matter at which time we get out of school#my other friends seem incapable of not checking calories VERY LOUDLY and calculating how much they lost walking around#my mom and i are home and awake at the same time abt two hours a day and one and a half of that is spent making/eating dinner lmao#im making the effort holy shit i am but i'm going to start being violent soon#i've started trying to strangle my cat twice in the past week i think#i'll show up tomorrow bc it's an opportunity and im not stupid enough to miss that by lack of self esteem#but really what is it good for#my friend isnt very delicate in her way to say it but she's right. i'm not cut out for being normal like that#i can sorta seem functional but you very quickly start seeing i don't know how to dress
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Delighted to say that I spent two hours and went absolutely tunnel-vision insane and cleaned so much of my room and also packed.
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bumpscosity · 1 year
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Remember when steven universe songs would be leaked like a year before the ep with it would come out
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cult-of-husbandos · 1 year
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yami ai [yandere] - Hot Yandere Singles Near You
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synopsis: you click on a random pop-up ad and are visited by weird smiling man in suit.
genre: pure crack (like fr), fluff, tbh there's not really a plot
word count: 4.4k
warnings: implied stalking
Isn’t insomnia just the worst? Like, seriously? What’s the point of being a human being with antiquated thoughts and impressive cognitive and motor skills when your brain fights you on the most basic stuff. For example, like sleeping!!
You must’ve refreshed YouTube and Twitter over a thousand times. Over 8 billion people in the world and there’s no new content anywhere? You groaned and jumped back over onto Twitter, silently praying and pleading for something new to show up on your feed. Maybe a wacky billionaire got eaten by a mob of homeless people or maybe a news article about a Floridian doing something gross and outrageous and virtually impossible.
But nope. Nothing.
Not a single thing piqued your interest. You groaned again and looked at the time on your dimly lit phone. It was past 2 a.m. and you were bored out of your mind. You then lazily clicked on Google and sighed.
‘Maybe someone posted a new fanfic over something…’ you hoped. And even if there wasn’t a new fic uploaded you’ll just read the old ones you favorited. Perhaps reading something might put you to sleep.
As you were scrolling through your favorite ship tags, you were startled by a pop up ad covering up 90% of the screen and flashing emojis.
“Ugh… seriously?” you groaned. “They should make ad-blockers on phones for this shit.” You squinted at the bright lettering emanating from your phone even though it was at the lowest brightness setting.
⚠️(99+) Hot Yandere Singles NEAR YOU⚠️
Yandere’s…? Singles? Near me?
The pop-up ad had flashing peach, cherry, and eggplant emojis with a water splash emoji at the end to signify… well, you’re not sure what it was trying to signify. On the sides of the ad, it showed pictures of very gorgeous men and women, all striking suggestive poses. Underneath the title was a small summary that read. ‘These lonely desperate yanderes wanna meet you! They’ll most likely find you anyway, but wouldn’t you rather be the honey to a bee instead of a fly? Try it NOW for FREE!! No hookups! No catfishes! No sign ups!’ Then below that were a few empty boxes to fill out requiring your personal information.
"..."
Was this a porn ad?!
No way at 2:45 in the freaking morning did you just get a porn pop-up ad while googling mafia au fanfiction. This has to be some kind of joke. Maybe it was prank and someone was just fucking with you. And how and why would there be 99+ yanderes in your area?! You couldn’t be surrounded by that many psychos. Could you? Whatever the case may be, it was now past 2 a.m. and as the rule of life states ‘Nothing good happens after 2 a.m.’. You don’t know if it was the lack of sleep or just reckless curiosity, but you gave your shoulders a shrug and mumbled a ‘fuck it’ as you put in your information. Your name, number, gender, age, preferred sex, email, and mailing address. As you clicked submit and continued scrolling, you gave very little thought about how this would go down.
On one hand, the ad turns out to be real and you get a partner out of this. Or
You get quartered, stalked, doxxed, and murdered like the dumbass you are for putting your personal info into a sketchy porno-like pop-up on Google.
Or, it turns out to be a prank and some asshole sitting in a basement has a good laugh at you.
Meh. You’ll deal with it in the morning.
*****
You were jolted awake with the sound of rapid knocking coming from your front door. You groaned into your pillow as you tried to ignore the person desperately wanting your attention from outside your apartment. You finally got some sleep only for it to get interrupted. Only minutes and minutes of continued knocking without any signs of letting up, you decide to get up and shoo away whoever it was. You wearily grabbed your phone to check the time.
8:02 a.m.
You huffed as you stormed towards the front door.
“If this a fucking Jehova’s Witness, I swear to god…” you grumbled. You swung open the door and threw the person a harsh glare, only to be met with popping sounds as confetti flew in your face.
“Good morning, my dear darling~!! Are you ready to begin on the road to happiness and love?” the stranger shouted a far too happy tone for 8 in the morning.
You took a step back in shock, fully awake as you waved and dusted the confetti from your face and hair. You looked the strange man up and down. He was smiling ear to ear and wore an expensive looking suit to warm for the summer weather. A briefcase stood right beside him along with dozens of other party poppers and a white plastic bag filled with brown bottles with oddly enough no labels on them. You looked at the man’s face. He was surprisingly attractive and without a single flaw anywhere. His hair was jet black and shined a very prominent gloss. You were honestly kind of embarrassed to be seen by him when you looked like such a mess. The man let out a chuckle.
“Oh my.” he said, gently putting his hand over his mouth with vague concern. “I hope I didn’t startle you too much. I probably should’ve sent you an email notifying you of the time I was coming. I’m sorry that must’ve been a troubling awakening.”
You quirked your eyebrow and took another step back, grabbing onto the doorknob so that you could slam it right in his face if things got too weird.
“And… you are?”
“Oh my, oh my. Where are my manners? How careless of me to assume.” The man bowed with a curtsy. “I am the ‘Matchmaker’. My job is to pair two people with their fated soulmate and give each of my clients their happily ever after. It’s very nice to meet you, (Y/N) (L/N).”
You felt a chill crawl down your spine. How’d this weirdo know your name?! You tried to close the door as fast as you could, but the ‘Matchmaker’ was even faster. He clicked his tongue at you, his smile unchanging, but his eyes seemed to harden his gentle tone.
“My, how rude. Is that any way to treat a guest?” He let out another chuckle. “You’ll never find love that way.”
“H-How did you know my name?” you stuttered.
Again, another chuckle. What was so funny? “My dear~. You gave it to me.”
What the hell was he talking about? How could you have given this creep your name? Was he a stalker? A junkie? Noticing the confusion on your face, the man spoke up again.
“Oh my dear. Do you really not remember?” he asked, tilting his head in feign innocence. “You filled out an ad to meet singles in your area. And here I am, coming to fulfill that ad.”
You eased up on the tension you had on the door and tilted your head in surprised confusion. “That was a real ad?”
The man stood up tall and smiled earnestly again. “Of course. However, you are the first person to actually fill out that ad. Really, this is more of a celebration to both of us.”
Huh, so the pop-up ad was real.
Not a prank.
And now there’s a psycho standing at your front door promising you a partner from an actual yandere.
“I honestly thought it was a prank. I mean… yanderes? Isn’t that just an anime thing?”
“Oh, I assure you my darling.” he said with a snide smirk. “Yanderes are real. And when they heard about signing up, it was like tossing chicken in a sea of alligators. All clamoring to be the first person to take a bite.”
Okay, gross but kind of sweet.
“May I come in?”
“Huh?”
“Well, my dear. It would be easier to come in and talk through the process of how this goes instead of standing here.”
“Oh, um… Suuuree-”
“Great! My my darling~. What a lovely home. Very well decorated.” The man quickly strided into your house and made himself comfortable in your living room, looking as if he was analyzing every detail about your house.
Richard Chase would’ve loved your dumbass.
You shut the door and followed him into your own apartment and offered him a seat on your couch. Might as well, right? You’ve gone this far and you're still alive.
“Umm…” you hesitantly shifted from one foot to another. “Do you… um… want some coffee maybe? Or tea? Maybe a glass of water? If you haven;t eaten breakfast yet, I whip you up something.”
Yeah, sure. Feed the man with only a title for a name and waltzed right into your house after showing up after you put in your personal information into a random pop-up ad at 3 a.m. promising you a happy life with hot single yanderes in your area. You are the pinnacle of human genius. The apex of natural selection. The creme de la creme of common sense. Charles Darwin would be so impressed.
“How thoughtful. Just coffee would be fine. Thank you.”
After brewing a quick pot, you sat across from the man facing him heads on and gently slid him his steaming cup. After a while of taking little sips in weird silence, he spoke up again.
“Before we continue, I’d just like to say: Thank you so much for applying for this wonderful opportunity!! Not many people would click on an ad requiring doxxing information to meet their soulmates! Again, congrats on being our number one willing client!”
“Willing client?” you asked.
“Well, of course! For some reason, humans seem to really love the idea of a yandere until there’s one standing on their front porch!” he laughed.
“Humans? I’m sorry. Are you not human, Mr…?”
“Ah ah! No need for formalities! Just ‘The Matchmaker’ or simply ‘Matchmaker’.
“Oh, so… you don’t have a true name? Or is that just a title?”
“Oh darling~.” he sang sweetly. “That’s none of anyone’s fucking business, is it?”
Your eyes widened and let out a nervous chuckle. “Okay, got it! Just Matchmaker. Lovely name. Adore it. In fact, I love when strange mysterious men only give a title for a name.” What the hell does that even mean? You had no idea what you were saying anymore.
“Heh, smart cookie.” He winked. “Shall we begin?”
“Um, yeah, so… how does this work exactly?” you finally asked.
“Simple, my dear darling. Think of this as an ordinary matchmaking appointment. I have a stack of potential soulmates all ready to meet you. I have the same information about them that I also have of you. Each potential soulmate also has a picture so if you don’t really feel up to meeting face-to-face just yet you can look over the picture and see who captures your heart.”
“Face-to-face? So these guys have my picture too?” “Of course! And might I say, those pictures don’t do you justice. In all my years in this business, I’ve never seen such an obsession and overload of potential soulmates for just one person.”
You lightly blushed. “I-I don’t know about that… I barely got any sleep last night so I probably look like a zombie right now…”
“Au contraire, Darling. You look absolutely stunning. If I weren’t such a professional I would burn all these forms and claim you as my one and only~.”
You felt your entire face flush red as the Matchmaker pierced your soul with his longing gaze. It felt like he was staring into your very essence – like he could read you like a book. You nervously cleared your throat and shifted your eyes away, hoping to bring down your blush.
“S-So! Um… should we get started?” you stuttered, internally kicking yourself for being so easily flustered by a couple of smooth words. Ted Bundy would’ve had a field day with your dumbass.
“Ready whenever you are, my dear.” The Matchmaker set his briefcase on your coffee table and pulled out a single form and slid it over towards you. “Let’s start off with an easy one.”
You looked at the form along with the picture of a very attractive man paperclipped to the paper. According to the form, his name is Hamazawa Akita. He was in his early 20’s, had a varying array of hobbies from hiking to scuba diving, and was very much in love with you.
“Well, what do you think?”
“Hm, well, he’s very cute. And very active.”
“Would you like to meet him?”
“Um, sure… is there a number I could call or…?”
“No need! We can bring him in right now.” The Matchmaker snapped his fingers and you whipped your head towards the front door where Akita strolled in, all smiles. You looked back over the Matchmaker. “Did I not lock my door? Wait. More importantly, how’d he get here?!”
The Matchmaker smiled. “My dear, when you’re in this business you pick up a few tricks.” He then turned his attention towards Akita who now stood in the middle of the living room. “No. 1 would you like to introduce yourself?”
Akita stood tall and his eyes seemed to beam directly at you. “My name is Hamazawa Akita. Ever since I saw your picture I’ve dreamed about sweeping you off your feet and claiming you all to myself!”
“So, like 8 hours ago?”
“Yes!! But those hours feel like years when being away from you.”
“Hmm.”
“So, what do you think? Are you feeling the butterflies?”
You looked up Akita up and down and your face twisted as if you’re deciding on whether or not to buy a car or a piece of clothing.
“Um, to be honest my guy. I’m not feeling it.”
“Huh?”
“Excuse me, my darling?”
“Weeeelllll…. I mean, don’t get me wrong! You’re very attractive and your words are sweet, but I don’t think I believe any of it. Like, you just admitted to wanting me all to yourself only 8 hours ago, but I don’t really feel anything. Not even a shiver.”
The Matchmaker and Akita both looked at each other like they weren’t really expecting that. With a quick wave of his hand, Akita slumped his shoulders and headed towards your front door. You shouted out an apology as the dejected suitor walked out.
“Well, I didn’t expect that. I don’t normally get such competent clients. At least those that get past kicking and screaming.” The Matchmaker grinned. You shrugged.
“I guess I just know what I like. All the anime I’ve watched kind of gives you that high standard of what makes a yandere a real yandere, y’know?”
He nodded. “I cannot agree more. Well, we have plenty more where that came from. Shall we continue?”
*****
Papers were strewn across your coffee table in an unorganized fashion as both you and your estranged guest were tired beyond belief. You had no idea how many hours had passed nor how many guests were in and out of your apartment. You’re honestly surprised none of your neighbors complained or called the police. Your apartment would’ve looked like a clown car if anyone had been watching from the outside. You honestly lost count after No. 256. You let out another yawn and laid on your side trying your best to keep your eyes open. Maybe 2 hours of sleep wasn’t enough for the multiple interviews you had to conduct today. Maybe your 9th grade biology teacher was right. Maybe you are going to die alone. A weary sigh brought you from your thoughts.
“My, my. You are definitely the most high standard client I’ve ever had. I didn’t think we’d get to the triple digits in just one day.”
You also sighed and sat up in your seat. “I know. I’m sorry. It’s just… All these guys are cute and all, but they’re all lacking something. They’re either too forceful or not forceful enough. Too wimpy or too strong. Or too obsessed or just incredibly so lovesick that I feel like they’d fall in love with just about anyone who’d be willing. Ugh, why can’t this be simpler like adopting an animal?” You groaned. You also hadn’t thought this would take this long. You didn’t really think of yourself as having high standards until today. Until today, you’d be happy with anyone close to you in age and with a heartbeat. Who knew picking out a yandere soulmate would be so challenging. And who knew that there’d be so many willing participants! The Matchmaker reached into his briefcase and pulled another stack of forms and slid them over to you. There must be at least over a hundred papers in front of you. How did he have so many?!
“How about we switch things up, hm? You’ll look over the papers and when you see someone that catches your eye, I’ll bring him in.” He made it sound like you were adopting a dog or a cat. But if this made it go any faster, you were willing to try.
After about 3 more stacks of papers, you were starting to lose hope and patience. When you got to the last few papers, you stopped dead in your tracks. Woah baby!
“Woah baby!” you exclaimed.
“Did you find someone you like?” The Matchmaker asked hopefully.
“Oh yeah. This guy.” You showed him the paper. He furrowed his brows a little.
“Are you sure? I don’t think I remember this man. His name and face don’t seem familiar.”
“Really? Maybe he’s a late entry or something?”
Matchmaker stroked his chin in thought. “I’ll go check it out. Be right back, dear. I’m very sorry for this inconvenience.”
You waved off his apology with a smile and he left your apartment. You then leaned back with a groan. You just wanted to find your ‘soulmate’ or whatever and move on with this day. You closed your eyes for a second and waited patiently for Matchmaker to come back.
Tap tap tap
Just like deja vu, you were awoken by rapid knocking. Except this time it wasn’t coming from your front door.
Tap tap tap tap
It sounds like it’s coming from… your window?
Tap tap tap tap tap tap tap
You quickly got up and walked towards your window and opened it.
“Woah!” You jumped back a little as you were met face to face with the man that you had picked out and that the Matchmaker went to go find.
‘Wow… he’s even cuter in person!!’
He let out a delicious chuckle and gave you a charming smile.
“I didn’t mean to scare you, darling~. Hehe, though I think that fear in your eyes was worth it. So adorable~.” For the second time today, a complete weirdo stranger has made you blush. Wait…
“Wait! I don’t have a balcony and I’m on the third floor. How’d you-?” You peeked over the window to see if he was pulling a Criss Angel.
“I have incredible grip strength~.” he winked.
“Oooh I’m sure~.” you swooned. For a weirdo, he was a smooth talking weirdo.
“Oh, I got these for you, sweetheart~.” He pulled himself up and sat on your windowsill and pulled out a bouquet of roughly cut flowers from behind him. You gasped and grabbed them, giving them a smell.
“These are my favorite!! How did you know? I don’t think that was one of the pieces of info required for the Matchmaker.” you asked.
The stranger chuckled. “Easy. I never filled out that stupid application.”
You looked up from your flowers and titled your head like a confused puppy.
“I already know everything about you. I don’t need a stupid piece of paper to tell me what I already know about you. Like, how I know that you have secret sweets hidden all throughout your room. Or that whenever you have a good day you love to sing Stray Kids.”
He inched closer to you as you backed up further into the room.
“You won’t eat frozen pizza, but every so often you eat a lobster roll from a food truck from Gary on Main St.. You have life destroying evidence of your boss that you’re planning on using on your last day. You’ve seen the Barbie movie 5 times. And…”
You felt your legs hit the couch and tried to keep yourself from falling onto your back like a defenseless turtle.
“Your favorite anime is… Dar-” You quickly covered the stranger’s mouth with a furious blush.
“I only watch it ironically!! I don’t love it! It’s not my favorite!” you quickly clarified. The gravity of the situation was made perfectly clear after that. This man really knew all about you. Honestly, you’re so loud that you’re pretty sure that people on the ground outside could hear you singing. And you don’t really pay attention to your surroundings so it's easy for someone to know that you eat from a food truck every other week at specific times. But, knowing your favorite secretly watched anime?
“W-Who… are you?” you stuttered. You’re pretty sure you already knew the answer.
He laughed and you felt his lips brush against your fingers. You blushed and tried to pull back, only to be stopped by his hands.
“Sweetie~. You already know who I am.” He grabbed the paper from the stack and put it next to his face. “See? I’m Yami Ai. Your soulmate.”
Before you could even process what was happening, you were gently pushed onto the couch with Yami hovering over you holding your hands beside your head. You couldn’t stop the blush erupting from your neck to your face. Your heart was beating way too fast and your stomach felt jumpy and queasy. Butterflies.
You cleared your throat. “Um… so, if you didn’t fill out a form then how come The Matchmaker had your profile and picture? And why didn’t you use the front door?”
Yami smirked and leaned in closer. “It’s pretty simple to pull off when your apartment does security checks on new guests entering the building.”
“But, my apartment doesn’t–” you stopped. “Ooooh… So you impersonated a security guard, slipped your profile and info into his briefcase, and were planning on showing up as one of the potential singles? That’s… convoluted. But, smart.” You shrugged. “And since you obviously knew which floor I was on and which window was mine, I assume you’ve been watching me for a while and were watching me last night when I couldn’t sleep?”
Yami laughed again. “You are so smart~. You really catch on quickly, don’t you?”
You shrugged again with a nervous smile. “W-Well, obviously not smart enough to not put in my personal info and have strange men come in and out of my apartment.”
Yami was quick to turn his gentle smile into a hard, harsh frown. His grip on your wrists grew tighter and you winced under the force he placed in you.
“You know, my darling. It’s partially my fault. If I hadn’t backed out and taken you that night, you’d never be in this situation. With those men eyeing you up and down like you were theirs. Having that smiling freak calling you ‘dear’ and ‘darling’ when only I can call you that. I was planning on getting rid of the competition, but you did that for me.”
Yami loosened his grip and lifted you up, staring into your eyes. You blushed again.
“Rejection after rejection. Some guys didn’t even get 2 words out before you turned away. Of course my darling would only want the most perfect man. Isn’t that right, darling~?”
“Hehehe~” you leaned in with a giggle. “You’re so sweet~.”
You are such a baby for flattery.
*****
“My dear darling, I’m so very sorry for the inconvenience. I didn’t mean to be gone for so long, but I could not find this person you–” Matchmaker explained, rushing in and stopping dead in his tracks when he saw both you and Yami, the man who left 30 minutes ago to go find, eating breakfast in the living room.
Sitting in his lap.
And feeding each other.
“Oh! Matchmaker!” you exclaimed, quickly swallowing your food. You didn’t notice Yami tightening his grip on your waist nor did you notice the cold glare and tense atmosphere enveloping the room. “Look who I found~.”
“I see…” he said hesitantly.
“He climbed up the building and came in through the window.”
“My~. How romantic~.” he sang. “So, I take it that you are satisfied with your soulmate? Or… do you wish to continue searching?” he asked teasingly. Before Yami could say anything, you quickly spoke again.
“Yep! I’m sure.” You ruffled Yami’s hair and nuzzled up against him. “I wouldn’t trade him for anyone else.” Yami hugged you closer to his chest as you giggled. “Plus, he makes the most amazing breakfast in the world, so extra points!” you cheered. You reached out towards the Matchmaker’s briefcase.
“Here you go! I put all the papers back in for you.”
Matchmaker quickly walked over and grabbed his briefcase along with your hand. “Well, my dear. It’s been an honor. You are truly the most remarkable and memorable client I have ever had.” he said with a bow and made his way towards the door. However, before leaving he chuckled and looked back at the both of you. “Although, it’s a shame,” he sighed. “Maybe if I had stayed, I would’ve snatched you up myself.”
And with a final loud laugh, The Matchmaker disappeared, but not before Yami stood up to lounge and attack the fleeting man like a guard dog. You snorted and caressed his face to calm him down. “Relax, Yami. He’s just joking.”
“Well, I hated his joke. Fuckin’ freak…” he grumbled. “And it’s Ai. You’re mine now. You should get used to calling each other by our first names.”
You smiled and leaned against him. “Okay, Ai. Whatever you say.”
“And if a man comes to the door, never EVER answer it, got it!”
“Mhm.”
“I’m serious, darling. I’ll gouge their eyes out right in front of you.”
“Yes sir.”
The rest of your life was going to be very interesting. Suck it, Ms. Braxton. I guess you’re the one dying alone. Because you have a yandere boyfriend! And she has gonorrhea. Bitch.
---
a/n: this is so shit. i'm so sorry that i've been MIA for a while. work has been pretty crazy and i haven't really felt much motivated to write. however, i'm trying to get back into it now. with this goofy shit. kind of a joke piece, but i needed to write something silly and not serious at all to relax. (also i've been writing since 4 a.m., so...) anyways, i'm going to try and update regulary or at least post something.
Here's my YouTube. I make anime playlists.
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strawberrygyuuuu · 6 months
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𝐓𝐗𝐓 𝐃𝐀𝐓𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐇𝐄𝐀𝐃𝐂𝐀𝐍𝐎𝐍𝐒
Genre —> Fluff
—> what it's like being in a relationship with them.
ˎˊ₊˚﹕﹒₊‧ ﹒₊˚𓂃・୨୧・ˎˊ₊˚﹕﹒₊‧ ﹒₊˚𓂃
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YEONJUN
• He's so cutie
• loves having at least a hand on your thigh or around your waist bc it makes him feel at ease
• it's also js a natural reflex to just swing his arm around you or sum
• I can see him liking physical affection; or just any affection at that tbh
• he's just so opening loving especially to you so even if your love language isn't physically affectionate it's not a problem to him at all
• I believe his love language is a little bit of everything but more heavy on gift giving, quality time and physical affection.
• he loves gifting you stuff, he has the money and he may not always have the time so gifting you something he knows you'll like or heard you said you wanted is a way to show you that he still cares
• quality time because he knows y'all can't always be together because of his schedules and stuff but he tries
• anytime he can he'll send you a quick text to check up on you or a quick I love you text, maybe call for a few minutes or a quick visit on his lunch break to you
• physical affection because idk I feel like he's so cuddly, esp when he's sleepy or it's been a long day, a long time since he's seen you (like after tour for example).
• he lets you glam him up
• like...full on you can dress him how you like, makeup, heels, cute hair clips, babe have fun he's just happy to be there and that you're happy
• happy you = happy Junnie
• he's also a guy who would stare at you in such a lovesick way just in full adoration staring at you
SOOBIN
• soft giant
• yeah, he's tall asf but he's so gentle and sweet
• he was shy in the first month or two in the relationship before getting more comfortable with initiating things first n stuff
• if y'all were good friends before dating I think he'll be a little less shy, but not by much. Just a little more confidence
• he gives you piggyback rides, sometimes you don't have to ask like, if your feet hurt from walk or sum he'll gladly put you on his back or tell you to get in his bsck
• I think his love language is quality time and gift giving
• just being in the sa room as him doing your own thing, vibing
• or clinging to each other and talking, or just clinging to each other doing your own thing
• gift giving because I think he wants you to remember he loves you even if he can't always verbally tell you
• he's shy leave him alone😭
• he's trying to get better at words of affirmation tho so it's ok
• tucks you into bed and kisses your forehead, tell me I'm wrong you can't.
BEOMGYU
• It's definitely never boring
• the dates? Always spontaneous
• like..it can be a random afternoon on Tuesday and he'll just start getting ready and you have no choice but to follow him lol
• it could js be a walk, walking to nowhere in specific and if y'all find a cafe or a store you guys haven't seen before best believe you guys are going to explore that shit lol
• not all dates ofc, some are planned and romantic
• teases you a lot and is very playful but knows when to stop
• he doesn't over do it, usually just to get your attention tbh
• and this boy almost always wants your attention but it's okay bc you love him
• loves putting your hair in little ponytails on the top of your head on each side and literally pouts so much if you try and take it out or complain about it
• he giggles and is happy tho so ig it's worth it
• I think he sometimes try and wake up a little earlier just to spoil you; gifts, food, ur fav snacks and drinks and some new clothes or orders lots of stuff from online websites just to surprise you
• ofc there are moments where he knows to be serious or to calm down and enjoy the moment together w you
• he's the sweetest and is just v playful, pls be kind to him.
TAEHYUN
• he may seem cold or mean ig but he's so gentle and nice like he is the dream
• he's okay with physical affection but it's not his favorite, doesn't mean he'll complain or try and get you off if you initiate some from time to time though
• when sleeping, he will cuddle you because that's how he gets good sleep at night so enjoy it babes
• words of affirmation and quality time
• hes good at telling you words of affirmation, compliments and even tho he says I love you in special moments, he still tells you things to let you know he does love you, so much.
• I feel like quality time is obvious; I think he's more kept to himself but can be very fun and expressive at times
• spending time with you in the same room is something he likes doing
• it's comfort to him just by you being near him or beside him
• loves going places with you even if you've been there multiple times before. He just wants to be with you even if it's walking for ten minutes
• he writes cute & short notes to you before leaving for work usually because he leaves and wakes up earlier then you
• he DEF has a memory box of the things you've gifted him to cherish
• he adores you and loves you so so much, he trusts you and you're his first priority; over his work too.
• idk guys he's a keeper
HUENINGKAI
• soft giant pt.2
• memory box of things you've given him pt.2
• you guys gift each other plushies and stuffed animals bc it's like a cute little thing y'all do
• def keeps the stuffed animals/plushies you give him somewhere special separate from his plushies
• physical affection, words of affirmation
• he loves to cuddle, hold hands, kisses, hugs, literally anything he adores you
• he's so sweet and kind and gentle and soft ARUGH OTL
• he is the golden retriever bf
• really likes telling you how pretty you are or how he thinks your hair looks cute that day and expects you to also give him compliments
• actually, you better give him compliments and love him with all your heart bc he worships the ground you walk on so pls take good care of this big baby he's a sweet thang
• never had a bad word towards you or raises his voice at you
• I can see him sometimes trying to wrestle you a little but it's so gently it's just cute and y'all are a giggling mess
• JS LOVE THIS BOY PLS HE DESERVES THE WORLD
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Note
okokokok but what abt ellie taking care of long-kinda curly hair! reader? like, reader also wants her to help, specially when washing it, cumbing and use dryer
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this' me btw if u even care
Wash day - (ellie williams x reader)
Hi poookieeee!! As someone with very curly hair this was needed, i hope you enjoy <33 also hello kitty??? my favorite type of kitty tbh
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Pairing: ellie x fem!reader
requests are open! send me your silly thoughts
warnings: none
Summary: in which she helps you with your hair
authors note: ugh i found out that ill only know if i got into uni in November, i'm going insane
masterlist
Ellie watched as you walked all over your shared apartment.
You walked from room to room grabbing different bottles of things she wasn't sure of. She heard you mumbling as you continued to grab towels and more bottles.
Ellie got up and she gently grabbed your wrist "baby slow down"
you looked at her with a small smile
"i cant slow down now, i need to start so i have enough time to finish"
Ellie raised an eyebrow "to finish what?"
"Its wash hair day"
She looked at the bottles to see hair products and other items. You removed yourself from Ellie's gentle grip before taking all the products into your arms.
"i would love to stand and watch you stare at all my stuff but i really want to start with my hair"
In all the months that the two of you have been together Ellie has never seen you do your hair. You would go into the bathroom and you'd come out with your natural curls after a few hours.
Ellie loved when you wore your hair naturally, but she also knew how much work it takes to maintain your hair.
"I want to help you"
You looked at her, jaw slightly ajar.
None of your partners has ever offered to help, they actually always had a problem with how long it took you to finish. But Ellie always told you to take your time, she bought whatever you needed, she was different.
It was the bare minimum but because no one has ever done this, you were taken back by this gesture.
god you really loved this girl
"Yeah" you quickly cleared your throat.
Ellie followed you to the bathroom and you quickly gave her a rundown of everything that needed to happen.
Wash, products, style, dry
It sounded simple to Ellie but when she saw everything you had set up, she knew that would be a long process.
Ellie sat on the edge of the tub as you went onto your knees, a smirk appeared on her face.
"oh so we're doing something else?"
you rolled your eyes "ew no. You're washing my hair"
Ellie chuckled as you rolled your eyes.
You shuffled closer to the tub and you leaned forward, so that just your hair was in the tub.
Ellie grabbed the shower head and she brought it to your head. As the water droplets fell onto your hair, it immediately curled even more than it already was.
After a few minutes you instructed Ellie to put a hair mask on. She gently squeezed the thick mixture onto her hand and she applied it to your scalp.
You almost moaned at how good she was massaging you. She had very skilled fingers so she knew what she was going.
"Just like that els" you sighed she chuckled.
"You normally say that to me when-"
"no"
Ellie let out a laugh before rinsing your hair.
She followed all the instructions you gave her when it came to applying shampoo, conditioner, she even checked the temperature of the water, like you told her.
After everything you got up and you gently wrapped your hair in a towel.
You kissed her forehead "thank you els"
You started to make your way to the bedroom.
"Where are you going?" she asked
"To finish my hair"
"i wanna come"
"then come"
She happily followed you to the room and she watched you from the edge of the bed.
"When can i help?"
"Let me do this part myself ok? You can help me dry it"
Ellie nodded watching you intently.
She watched you apply more product to your hair. You applied curl cream, some weird clear gel Ellie has never heard of, you even applied different oils.
Holy shit is it really this complicated to have curly hair?
"Come on Ellie" you suddenly called.
You scrunched your hair a little and you gave her a hairdryer.
You showed her exactly how to do it. She grabbed the dryer and she started from top to the bottom, just like you showed her.
You smiled as you looked at her in the mirror, she has a focused look on her face, her tongue slightly sticking out.
After 20 minutes she was done and she took a step back admiring her work.
You got up and turned to her and she gave you a smile.
"you look pretty"
"thank you baby"
You walked towards her and you gave her a kiss on the cheek. Ellie pulled out her phone and she grabbed your hand
"lets take pictures"
"why?"
"i want to remember the day i did your hair"
"Aren't you tired if my hair yet?"
"i love your hair"
<3
175 notes · View notes
angelyuji · 1 year
Text
yandere headcanons :0
across the spiderverse characters: peter b parker, miles, gwen, miguel, hobie, pavitr
warnings: the usual yandere stuff (kidnapping, manipulation, stalking)
(imagine miles, gwen, pavitr like college age) (gender neutral reader)
peter b
literally so in love with you
he’s not the type to sit and stalk you from a far, but he’s also not straight up kidnapping you
he’ll watch you, find out your interests, find your social media, everything he needs to figure out how to be your perfect lover <3
he becomes your friend and integrates himself into your life
if you like him, he has no reason to separate you from your family or friends becuz he’s the perfect boyfriend. no one has anything negative to say abt him
if you don’t… he’ll do anything to make you like him.
convince you your whole family is evil and he’s the only one really looking out for you
he’s awkward and sweet and kind and so funny and it’s hard not to believe him
wants the American dream life: white picket fence, house in the suburbs, marriage, kids
that’s his dream for the both of you and he doesn’t really care if you don’t have the same dream
“you’re my dream, (y/n). everything i do, it’s always been for you.”
miles (aged up!)
miles is similar to peter b but like also not
very stalker but like without knowing, he’d pass your place over and over during his patrols around the city without realizing
he’d never kidnap you or do anything reallyyy morally wrong
howeverrr he’s absolutely in love with you, so like small little things
stalking, stealing small things from you, finding out the shampoos or different things you use or eat.
he feels closer to you, knowing he knows you better than anyone else.
after a long time, he’ll work up the courage to talk to you (“accidently” bumping into you at a coffee shop or a place you visit frequently) miles (albeit awkward) is a charmer, so you’re instantly smitten.
plus! he loves all the things you do, so you’re a match made in heaven :)
“hey, (y/n)! we meet again!”
gwen (aged up!)
gwen doesn’t try to interact with you much
she’s definitely afraid of putting you in danger or losing you just because you got close
she’ll watch over you and protect you from danger tbh like
for example, sayyy someone was harassing you at work and/or school, you’d probably successfully get that off your ass or at least they leave you alone for the day, butttt gwen would not feel satisfied.
gwen would find where they live and absolutely beat the living shit out of them
seeing someone bother you makes her vision go red like
basically your guardian angel
she would never bother you really just protecting you from afar
you’ll never notice tbh
unless some big bad guy found out that ghost-spider has been following around a random civilian…
well then, she’ll have to keep you safe
she’ll keep you safe in her apartment, whether you want to be there or not.
“every single thing i do, i do it to keep you safe.”
miguel (won’t be writing in spanish cause i don’t know spanish srry guys) (but he def calls you cute nicknames in spanish)
HEHHEHEHEE (my bad im just literally in love)
gwen but like 10000000 times more intense
the moment he lays eyes on you, babes you’re FUCKED
he’s snatching you up
however! the first thing he’ll check is if you’re super important to the “safety” of the timeline
no offense but ur not at all important saurrr FREE GAMEE
he’s definitely kidnapping you and keeping you hostage at HQ
he doesn’t bother with the whole stalking thing or becoming friends or anything like that
he doesn’t care if you don’t want to come with him, your opinions do not matter to him at all
he believes that he’s your protector, that everything that he’s doing is for your own good
you don’t know what’s best for yourself, only miguel knows what’s best for you (at least that’s what he thinks)
his only goal is to keep you with him, he wants a family and he believes that with you… he can achieve his dreams
if you’re a part of the Spider Society, Miguel can’t really do anything to you without other people noticing or disrupting the timeline
but yk… it’s better to be a rando from whatever universe to have miguel’s attention (but that’s just my opinion i suppose)
“you are mine. you will never leave me.”
hobie (will not be writing his british accent sorry im bad at accents)
i love him he’s so funny
you’ve been friends for a long time, he was in a band with you before he quit
he doesn’t really stay in one place for long
he’s a lot like a mix of gwen and miles
he believes keeping you safe is by staying close to you, but he also watches over you when you’re alone
he falls for you because of how positive you are, you never talk badly about anyone, but you’re always down to do anything.
you always join him for every protest, at his every show
he flirts with you constantly, loving how you blush away at the attention
constantly giving you attention and love, but a little manipulative about it at the same time
he never wants to kidnap you or keep you hostage, it’s against everything he stands for
he knows that if you didn’t like him, you’d never be by his side
so he believes that keeping you free is what keeps you near him
“we’re free birds, (y/n). with you by my side, we’re unstoppable.”
pavitr (aged up!) (this is gonna be very non-yandere tbh) (ILOVEHIM)
my little cutie pie i love him
i can’t really imagine being a yandere type character but he would be similar in miles and hobie
no kidnapping or stealing tho
slight stalking, just watching over you all the time, making sure you’re safe
he’s my little cutie pie moroenfakds
he’s flirty and funny
you’d be classmates when you meet him
you’d click very quickly tbh he’s just so easy to get along with
he’s absolutely terrified of your parents, very respectful tho so your parents love him
very passionate about how much he likes you, would quite literally shout it from the rooftops (and he does every day)
ugh i love him
"you're my world, (y/n). i love you so much."
1K notes · View notes
kuroosdarling · 1 year
Text
STORMY NIGHTS — ༉‧₊˚.
ft. roomie!mattsun !
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꒰ CONTENTS ꒱ : MDNI. fem. reader, unprotected sex, praise, minimal prep tbh, oral (f!receiving), fingering, slight cervix fucking, creampie, light dose of aftercare — WC : 2.6k
꒰ SYNOPSIS ꒱ : after you and matsukawa started your roommates with benefits situation, the two of you have been taking full advantage of it. but tonight, it’s a little different. as the storm rages on outside, you’re doing everything in your power to keep the one inside you at bay. at this point, it’s hard to say whether the thunderstorm or your ever growing feelings for matsukawa are scarier.
꒰ NOTES ꒱ : im insane for this man atp. roommate mattsun lives in my mind rent free sigh. anyway, i hope y’all enjoy this !! i have more ideas for this guy so stay tuned !! and thank u for reading <3
reblogs and interactions are always appreciated ! (*ᴗ͈ˬᴗ͈)ꕤ*.゚
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the room fills with a bright flash of light, washing over your walls and illuminating every dark corner. within a few seconds, thunder pierces the silence. you couldn’t help but try and bury yourself under the blankets. storms like these were the worst.
the ones that rudely declare its presence in the middle of the night, ripping away any chance at a good night's sleep. the deafening booms ensure a restless night filled with dread knowing that tomorrow will drag on with exhaustion. thunderstorms could be nice, but right now, it has you shrinking further and further into your bed.
another loud noise went off, but it wasn’t thunder this time. you bolt up in your bed, staring at mattsun who was standing dumbly in the doorway, his hand still lingering on the doorknob. it was clear he didn’t mean to bust it open like that, but the damage was done.
“do you mind?” you screech out the last word, your heart beating out at your chest.
“i promise i knocked.” he walked in, chuckling with his hand shoved deep into his pockets. he was wearing those stupid gray sweatpants again and if you weren’t so scared right now, your mind would’ve wandered to what happened the last time he wore those. he knew you liked them and wasn’t afraid to sport them around the house. constantly. “seriously, relax, i just came in to check on you.”
“by scaring the shit out of me?” you huff as he climbs into the bed next to you. you cross your arms at the ease of it all, trying to keep your breathing still. at least you could chalk it up to the thunderstorm making you nervous and not the fact that he was inching closer to you.
“that was an accident.” he rolls his eyes. “you know your door gets stuck.”
“yeah because you and makki tried to play jackass and totally fucked up the lock.” the thunder sounded off again but it was mixed with mattsuns laugh. you tried to focus on that sound instead, not realizing you were leaning into him.
“you got me there.” he gives you a lazy smile before looking around. he knew you were scared and were just trying to keep a brave face. “why don’t we go in the living room and watch a movie? we can bring out our blankets and stuff.”
“yeah-“ the thunder cut you off, the lightning flashes throughout the room, casting a fleeting light over mattsuns face. you look at each other for a moment, your eyes holding back so many words that your lips wish to say. but instead you cower from the loud noise and the weight of your own feelings.
“alright let’s go.” he throws the blanket over you like a cape, the warm fabric wrapping itself around you like a safety net. immediately, he’s picking up the rest of your pillows and blankets, waiting for you to walk out of the room first.
you lead the way, taking your time. he follows you out into the room, throwing the pillows down on the floor.
“hey!” you snap at him, hurrying your way over to pick them up.
“what? we’re gonna lay on the floor.” he said like it was obvious. your eyes trail from him to the couch before you roll them.
“alright, fine. go get your stuff then.” you start arranging the pillows and blankets to a makeshift bed. he goes to his room without another word, hurriedly grabbing his stuff before the next thunder sounds off.
he tosses the pillow against your head, causing you to stumble forward. you whirl around, glaring at him as he holds up the other pillow with a goofy grin.
“are you really trying to have a pillow fight with me right now?” you scoff.
“not much of a fight though, is it.” he shrugs, moving closer. your eyes widen as you scoop up the pillow, turning to whack him against the head. he starts laughing, utterly amused at your attempt. 
“shut up.” you sigh, as you move to sit down. mattsun looks panicked for a moment, so split that if you weren’t already looking at him you would’ve missed it. unbeknownst to you, mattsun was trying his best to distract you from the storm outside, trying to keep your attention on him. 
“alright let’s put on a movie, yeah?” he throws down his pillow next to you, it landing with a soft thud before he practically flops onto the mountain of blankets youre perched on.
“what are we gonna watch?” you ask, trying not to look at the raging storm outside and instead focus on the one brewing deep within his dark eyes.
as soon as he turned on the tv, it blew out. in fact, all the lights in the apartment went out. the slight ticking noise of the AC filtering out before thunder overpowered it, booming throughout the room, causing you to smush yourself further into mattsun’s side.
instantly, his arm is around you. “hey, it’s alright. let me light some candles.” he presses a soft, comforting kiss against your head before getting up, making sure the blanket is safely covering you in his absence.
luckily, you had candles stored all throughout the shared apartment. he carefully took them out as well as his trusty lighter. he went around the room lighting each one, racing against the storm. your eyes didn’t leave him. soon enough, the warm glow filled the otherwise dark space, doing its best to combat the bright flashes from outside.
“there.” he said, looking somewhat proud of his job well done before he turned to look at you, almost surprised to see your eyes already set on his. you sat up, the blanket falling off of your shoulders, pooling around your waist. he slinks over to you and sits down on the blankets, easing you down with him as you lay side by side. “it’ll pass soon, im sure of it. just focus on me, okay?”
“okay.” you say, your voice barely above a whisper. it was a miracle if he heard it at all. the thunder continued to roar outside and he felt you start to tremble in his arms. he looks at you again, slowly moving in to kiss you on the cheek. 
“focus on my lips,” he says, starting to place sloppy, opened mouthed kisses along your neck. your sleep shirt — or rather, his t shirt– slips down your shoulder, leaving it bare. mattsun wasted no time as he trailed down your neck, leaving more kisses along your exposed skin before making his way back up. 
and whatever he was doing — it was working. instead of focusing on the lightning bolts crashing down outside, all you could do was melt from the kisses he laid upon your skin.
his deft fingers find your chin, pulling you in closer so he can properly kiss you on the lips. he was always a good kisser, taking his time as if it would be a crime not to. molding his lips to yours, savoring each bit as you easily find your rhythm together.
even though the kiss wasn’t explicitly passionate, it still left you breathless all the same. each slow caress stole more oxygen from your lungs until you were practically gasping for air. but he didn’t let up, sliding his hand up your thigh as his lips press against your neck. 
thunder clashed overhead again, causing mattsun’s hold on your thigh to grow tighter, using it as leverage to pull you flush against him as his own legs slot between yours. 
“gonna prep you now.” he mumbles against your neck. his fingers grab a hold of your flimsy sleep shorts and pulls them all the way down, along with your underwear. you gasp out but he swallows it, consuming your air once again. 
“already so wet f’me.” he murmurs in your ear, his lips resting on your lobe. he quickly slips another finger in, pumping both of them quickly to try and stretch you out, relishing in the way you squirm under him.
once the small whine left your lips, he couldn’t hold back anymore. giving you one last peck and sliding down, placing a kiss on each of your thighs before his tongue began to tease your folds.
mattsun could lay between your legs for hours if you let him, taking his time to savor you, having you come undone around him again and again until your thighs trembled around his head. it was his salvation, the answer to his prayers, the fix he needed to get through the night.
but he didn’t have that much time tonight, not when you were in desperate need of distraction. your fingers tugged on his hair, causing him to groan out into your cunt. the vibrations sending you closer to the edge. it was too much — his hips stuttered against the blanketed floor, begging for some sort of relief.
“issei-“ you breathe out. mattsun curses the thunder for trying to eat up your sweet sounds, but he moves back up to you so he can press his lips against yours.
“yes?” he asks, slipping a finger past his waistband and sliding off his sweatpants so he can free his aching cock. he needs to feel you. your breath hitches as it nudges against your thighs, his cock already wantonly twitching the moment he comes into contact with you.
“please, i’m ready.” you squirm in his hold, reaching down to wrap your hand around him. he hisses out in pleasure, his forehead knocking down onto yours as he feels his whole body succumb to you, his craving for you becoming too irresistible.
“okay.” he lets you guide him to your entrance, his tip pressing against your clit and trying to soak up all the slick and spit on your messy cunt. his hand wraps around yours, using it to guide him into you quicker, slowly pushing in. 
the stretch always took a second to adjust to once he was fully seated in your warm cunt, buried at the hilt. his size was no easy feat to take, the overwhelmingly sweet pleasure always accompanied by the slight sting of pain. and he was always so patient, softly peppering your skin with kisses. but tonight, you were too impatient for all of that, desperate to feel him. so you start moving your hips, catching him by surprise.
“slow down.” he grips onto your hips tightly, stilling you in place so he could properly collect himself. you pout up at him, not thrilled about having to wait any longer but you humor him. “i’ll give you what you want, don’t you worry, pretty.”
“then get on with it.” you breathe out as he pulls out of you – his tip nestled back at your entrance. he can feel you clench around him, strategically pulsing in a silent command to hurry up. before he starts, he cages you in his arms, pushing back in and lazily moving his hips with shallow thrusts. a small teasing smile takes up his face at your attempt to be demanding.
“don’t get all bratty on me now, i was just getting started.” his hips start to move faster, his cock practically kissing your cervix. each of his thrusts blurring your thoughts together, your mind growing dizzy from the intense pleasure. he looks at you and chuckles, watching your eyes roll to the back of your head in amusement. “you just wanted to be fucked dumb on my cock, is that it?”
“n-no.” you say, turning your head away from him in slight shame. but he barely lets you as he cusps your chin and pulls your attention back onto him.
“you’re lying now?” the smile on his face turns dastardly and you can’t help but moan as he pulls you tighter to him. feeling him stretch you out, overpower your senses, brings you closer as you teeter on the edge.
the thunder roared outside, but you barely heard it as it melted away in the background. it causes you to jump a little bit but you’re secure in mattsuns arms, his hold tightening. his pace doesn’t relent, in fact, it only speeds up. a softer look graces his features as he remembers what he was trying to do – distract you.
the candlelight caresses his face, intimately wrapping itself around his skin in the way that had you envying the soft light. to be that close to him, to share that space, you wanted more. it’s all feels more soft, muted, like he’s really taking care of you.
you clench around him, causing him to groan as you squeeze his cock, barely letting him pull out. he could never keep his cool around you for too long. 
“you’re so fucking pretty. how’d i get so lucky, huh?” he pulls you in closer, pressing up against you as if the air between you two was intruding in your space.
every time his skin touched yours, something new planted itself in its place, running deep through your veins, directly to your heart. no matter how many times you tried to starve it, neglecting to nourish it — it continued to grow to the point you couldn’t bury it anymore.
you loved him.
and it terrified you.
but it also drew you closer to your edge. 
“sei-“ you call out, your fingers gripping the blanket as you arch your back, your chest pressing against his. you can feel your thighs tightening around his hips, his large hands cupping your backside as he practically lifts your bottom half up to meet his thrusts.
you’ve never felt him this deep, like his cock was lodged all the way up inside of you, piercing your heart. you could barely speak, just babbling his name and letting out mewls of pleasure.
he was fucking you dumb but not dumb enough, as those feelings you’ve been trying to hide slips through the cracks and your faced with the horror of loving him — or rather, the horror of possibly having your heartbroken by him. 
“getting close?” he grunts down at you, his voice raspy and streaked with desperation. you brave yourself to look up at him through half lidded eyes, barely able to open them up all the way. you can feel him twitch inside of you as he lets out a groan — teetering on his own edge but adamant to feel you come undone around him first.
“yes, so, so close-“ you cry as his fingers find your clit again, lightly brushing against it and causing you to spiral down, to a paradise or the depths of hell — you didn’t know. all you knew is that you wanted him to come with you as you clutch onto him, dragging him with you as he fills you up with his cum.
he falls to his elbows, careful not to put all of his weight onto you. he kisses you softly, even though he couldn’t catch his breath. he didn’t want to pull out just yet, but knew that he wanted to clean you up.
with one last kiss to your head, he slides out and hisses at the sting of overstimulation. sliding his pants back on, he quickly makes his way to the bathroom. he’s back in another second with a towel, carefully cleaning you up and sliding his shirt back over your head.
you lay there, letting him take care of you as your hazy mind starts coming to again, swirling with many questions that you decide to wait and face them in the morning. for now, it was just nice to soak up all the affection he was giving you.
“i’m gonna blow out the candles, okay?” he asks you softly. you nod, letting him to his thing before he comes back to you and cradles you close to him, getting settled for the night.
even though the thunder had long since died out, neither of you moved. too lost in the sanctuary of each other's arms, creating a warm, safe space where you could both let your guard down, even just a little bit.
mattsun kisses your head gently as you nuzzle further into him. the two of you drifting off into a peaceful sleep, comfortably wrapped up in the blankets and each other's unspoken love.
and in the morning, when makki awoke to see his best friends curled up together on the floor, he didn’t say anything. he just quietly smiled to himself and retreated back into his room.
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aezuria · 6 months
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hiii i love ur writing sm!! i was wondering if u would do leo valdez x reader headcanons? ty!!!
*ੈ✎ keep your head still, i'll be your thrill
—all the small things, blink-182
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content: leo valdez x reader
warnings: cursing again
librarian's annotations: the title has no connection to the hcs but it came up while i was writing this also IM SO SORRY THIS TOOK FOREVER 🙏🙏🙏
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super clingy i do not make the rules
oh you thought you were gonna get up and be productive?? not today!
fuck everyone else tbh
LOVEEES gossip sessions with u
hes so invested in all the drama u have
probably laying on his stomach and swinging his feet and gasping incredulously. "what!? no she did not..."
got very pouty that you did not invite him to the girls night bc he didnt want to "miss out on the tea" (lwk stealing from my own work oops)
who can blame him tbh
LOVE LOVES DANCING
loves teaching u too (even if u suck)
like imagine him holding your waist and moving you to the beat as you fumble along, his chest pressed up against your own
GOOD LORD
"forward, back, left- there you go," he murmured into your ear, looking down at your feet. you stepped on his shoes a lot more than you should've; did he ever think that his proximity was why you were messing up!?
"you suck at this, don't you?" he laughed, but twirled you around anyway.
"did you ever think you're just a shit teacher?"
"rude!"
also this man was born a star
can probably hit super high notes as if its nothing
ok so we all know how hes a genius right
oh my GOD imagine him explaining how his stuff works and using words you're sure don't even exist and he's so into it and he just sounds so SMART
intelligence is so attractive why does no one talk abt that
you wanted to watch him work on the engine, so you pulled up a stool next to him. you stared at his side, his tank top dirty with grease and sticky with sweat. how long had he been working since you got here?
you'd get mad at him for not taking a break later. right now? you were admiring the view. who wouldn't?
"hey leo?"
he hummed in response, still hyper-focused on the engine.
"how does all that work, exactly?" you were never one for machines—good thing you have a mechanic boyfriend!
he looks to you, a happy glimmer in his eyes. "you really wanna know? so basically— this part connects to that part and then..."
you don't know how long you've been zoned out, too busy staring at his perfect
"y/n?" he finally realizes you haven't been paying attention. "you with me, now?" he raises an eyebrow with a grin on his face.
"huh? what?" you straightened up, fumbling over your words. "yeah! why wouldn't i be?" you tried to act as if you weren't just ogling him seconds before.
"oh y'know.. cause you were checking me out." he winked, leaning back against the engine as he put himself on display. "i mean, you obviously couldn't help it. i mean, look at me!"
someone humble him
its not like he doesn't do the same tho
if he accidentally walks in on you he'd be like "oh my gods-! sorry!" and cover his eyes with his hands, but his fingers are parted so he could still look through. literally the 🫣 emoji
"GET OUT!"
"OKAY I'M GOING DON'T HIT ME- OW!"
he is SUPER ticklish and you WILL use this to your advantage
esp his ears
one time you touched them out of curiosity cause theyre pointer than average and he was like "eek!"
pause
"aww i didn't know you could make that sound!" you poked some more fun at him because that was adorable
"shut up!"
another time he's laying on you, ruining your plans of getting up early and being active. you tried rolling out from underneath him but his arms snake around you like a vice, squeezing a groan out of you.
"leo get off!" you tried shoving him off, but that didn't work either. he simply buried his face into your neck, mumbling a tired no.
you really had shit to do, so you resorted to the last possible tactic. "i didn't wanna have to do this..." you warned. (you so wanted to do this)
you slipped your hands under his shirt and started tickling his stomach, effectively getting him writhing off you with laughter.
"stop-! that tickles!" he tried doing the same back, but he was squirming far too much.
ok real talk now
love loves staying up late with you until its past midnight and you guys are just rambling about random topics. he's just so relaxed with you, his heart feels so full and there's no space anymore, so his bottled up emotions spill out
which is usually a closely-guarded secret because he's just the funny guy of the group, right?
what does he know about feelings? isn't it his job to just keep everyone else happy? joking about everything will take away the pain, won't it?
(it doesn't)
"i don't know, i just- feel like i don't really fit in with everyone. they all have these cool powers, and i'm just.. me." he laughed dryly, face devoid of his usual happiness as he stared at the ceiling. "sometimes, i feel like you could do so much better. but at the same time?" his voice lowered as he rolled onto his side, staring into your eyes. "i want to keep you to myself. i really, really don't want to lose you."
you were glad he finally opened up to you, but your heart ached at the way he thought of himself. how could he not see how highly everyone thought of him, especially you?
"just you? leo, you're the coolest person i know. you're so, so smart, you can fix just about anything, you're funny, you're kind, you can cook; what's not to love?" you smiled softly. you could go on and on about this man. for him to think that he was the lucky one? it was quite the opposite.
"and you don't have to worry," you whispered, cuddling closer to him and pressing a soft kiss to his cheek. "i'll always be with you."
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thatdeadaquarius · 1 year
Text
PART 2 - Genshin Impact SAGAU / Isekai: Gifts to Give Your Allogene!
ELEMENTS HERE: Dendro, Hydro, Cryo, Geo
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Part 1 / Part 2 (you're here!)
Sun: Gender Neutral Reader (they/them only)
Planet: General SAGAU / Isekai Stuff, Platonic Cuteness
Orbit: Headcanons-ish, a couple sentences for each
Stars: a little bit of everybody as of Baizhu/Kaveh update! including rare beloveds like Aloy! (I hope I got them all… at least the playable ones… ) Please understand that some characters are more “foreground” characters and have more screen time so I may have written some more for them because I knew them better!
Comets & Meteors: Content Warnings: weapons for gifts?? 16+ Older Teen Audiences Advised, light cussing
& Trigger Warnings: None Known.
Edit 1/1/24: Hey I expanded on this in my Eldritch Fanfic Post Part 2, but I just wanted to vet the old posts and say I did do a form of exoticism by including the word "Huangdi" throughout this.
I've since replaced it for better readability with "Emperor" but I didn't want to erase my mistake like it never happened. I'm genuinely sorry about this, I never had ill intentions by including it, but regadless of intentions that's the impact of my actions. I'm absolutely going to be looking out for kind of thing in the future/get a sensitivity reader/a beta read from that culture to check me.
I hope you still enjoy my writing and can understand.
Dendro Allogenes:
Tighnari = with some help again to put magic into it, you give Tighnari some head coverings you sewed together that have the power of Cryo in them! So now he can actually see what plants are out in the desert, visit Cyno, or just enter the desert to his heart’s content, which, yes, his tail started unconsciously wagging after you explained what it was. “Oh! For me? Well I’ve taken to avoiding the desert if I can because of… wait a minute, you say it has cryo in it? What? How does that work?? You think it’ll genuinely help me in the desert?? You made it???” Tighnari’s ears are all twitching with excitement, and he’s holding the covering (that matches his clothes/dark green) like it’s a new plant for study, omg he pulled out his magnifying glass and everything-
Collei = so she’s actually a really good seamstress, and makes plushies a lot, esp for kids! but one day you found one of her first attempts, a ragged looking sort of pale pink bunny… her first attempt at a plushie Baron Bunny!! so you decided to mimic her design (still baron bunny but with a sort of Sumeru-like clothing on it), and sew her one! You made a whole day of it, eating together, going to the best spots to sightsee (for as long as Collei was up for it/not too tired) and then gifted her the plushie Baron Bunny! She accidentally let out a small scream that startled both of you tbh, and then snatched that shit so quick lmao, kicking her feet on the picnic blanket and everything! With your permission of course, Collei then tackled you for a hug lol, she ranted about all the little details and made you tell her several times over how you made it so she could make some more in the future too! She may or may not have talked about missing Amber and teared up… but then you redirected her attention to the bunny saying, it’s like a gift from Amber and you really! (you also added a function where, if you squeeze the Baron, it’ll dish out some healing power and some heat! …Collei tackle hugged you twice for that one)
Alhaitham = what a hard person to get gifts for, he’d probably be like “thanks” no matter what you got him 😭, he means it tho, it would just be underwhelming… but on the bright side, he definitely seems like he’d show a deeper appreciation for handmade gifts! Since you learned how to make one for Yoimiya, you decide this calls for another handmade hammock (also bc Teyvat doesnt have hammocks)! You painted symbols like green crystals and geometric patterns, but also lions and a golden Palace of Alcazarzaray for Kaveh, and your symbol, the eight point star (like the four point but with flare/not like the jewish symbol with equal points lol)!! So that way he can keep lazing away, and avoid people more comfortably lmao, and also if he is going to do that, he doesnt have to sit on rocks or hard structures for hours reading, and you hope it’s encouragement for him to spend time outside/take a break and nap! (Haitham knows that’s part of why you gave him this, even if you didn’t say it, and so he makes a point to do that more often to make you happy, take the advice for his health) oh look, after thoroughly looking at your craftsmanship for 10 minutes, you got a smile in addition to a “thanks”, damn, that’s actually how you know he likes it a lot <3 :)
Nahida = you remember vaguely from Nahida’s storylines/friendship levels that she loves games, and so you collect her a nice deck for Genius Invokation TCG! You also made her a cute bag and container for it, her bag is a rose maple moth crocheted bc really this was an excuse to just make the cutest character in Sumeru look even cuter, (like this, i tried very hard ok, bc this doesnt exist yet, im shocked) The first image is most correct, (imagine the face and stuff is cuter/simpler) as that’s also the backpack part! Her eyes were so big when you handed it to her, (you honestly were shocked they even could get any bigger lol). She jumped up and down excitedly with the backpack on (ur fucking heart, just like you intended, the wings flapped around and everything <333) you are also currently working on a luna moth (the pale green moth) in case she wants it to match her outfit more! even tho Nahida insists something handmade once is enough, you can see the childish yearning in her eyes, like a kid trying to say no to a toy that’s being offered right in front of them lmao
Kaveh = pretty girls deserve pretty things, and you were definitely feeling the pressure to make something high quality enough for Kaveh, tho u know he’s sweet enough that he’d appreciate anything you’d take the time to handmake (and tbh.. it sounds a little arrogant, but ur hoping something so cared for by what he, or at least most people see as some kind of all-powerful god above the archons, will boost his self-esteem/confidence in his own worth more, or at least let him know one more person cares about him…) so you didnt make it super detailed, and you put a note on it too to let him know your not as great at that as he would be, but you made a model of the part of the teapot house you’re going to design for him! Like a sort of sneakpeak, you made a small lookalike of Alhaitham and his house, but filled it with decor like if Howl didnt hoard all the cool shit in his room in Howl’s Moving Castle, but instead spread it out, and sort of used your modern taste for layout, (not the ugly ass corporate aesthetic) and a small garden. You also made nearly all the decor and stuff something interesting (like some primogem strings, they can be pretty small, for string lights, lampgrass from Mondstadt that he’s never seen etc.) and while you very shyly handed him the model at first, he was practically vibrating with excitement!! “You made this?! Oh of course I don’t expect perfection, it looks wonderful so far, especially if this was your first attempt!!” Kaveh has like sat down, and is delicately holding it and looking around, and when you tell him it’s an actual space, meant for him, he gently sets down the model and grabs you by the shoulders, “Show. Me. Now. …please?” looking at you with very determined puppy dog eyes lol
Yaoyao = …idk what you expected. It was so obvious. A crocheted bunny backpack. brown, so it matches her, since her basket was brown, or you could leave off the feet, whichever u prefer, and anyway, Yaoyao is always doing things for others, so the little girl was so cute and pink when you actually gave her something instead! (once again, using ur old trick of making the person think u need something then shocking them with a handmade gift instead hehe) She IMMEDIATELY switched it out for her basket and has pretty much converted to using it full time! (tho when she needs the more solid one she’ll still wear it, she just alternates, esp if there’s some occasion she’ll deffo wear the bunny backpack, it’s her “fancy god-made bunny backpack!”)
Baizhu = the doctor isn’t one to talk about himself a lot, so you weren’t sure what he would like other than some new tea… but you wanted to make it yourself so while you were a little disappointed it was just a basic pet gift, you wanted to maybe put a little extra into it so maybe Changsheng will use it and Baizhu will think it’s cute! You crocheted a little pet pod/cave for her to hang out in (imagine this but a Jueyun Chili hehe) and it also has a little crocheted vine rope so the little Jueyun Chili cave can be hung from things, or even tied onto Baizhu’s apron/hold it like a purse! That way Changsheng doesn’t always have to drape across his shoulders/has somewhere to retreat! When you shyly showed Baizhu and Changsheng, he literally clapped, so did Qiqi lol (he usually does those tiny smiles… but this one was the brightest most genuine you’ve ever seen, even in game…!!) You find that Baizhu’s eyes look like that type of person’s eyes were they just look like “happy”, like there’s a little fond sparkle in his eye. Changsheng was all like “about time I got something instead of him! I’m basically an assistant too y’know! …thank you very much, my Emperor.” (if you’re NOT squimish of snake pics, pls look at this cute smile Changsheng would give)
Hydro Allogenes:
Barbara = …so even Barbara was a little hesitant at first, but came around to the idea after some convincing, and some encouragement (and showing her she was capable of it) but you basically ….may ….or may not have… found a loop hole for her being a catalyst? So, thru a lot of persuading Barbara to train with you and Childe (who also thought it was amusing to see such a young girl who’s literally a nun and a singer do this) you got Barbara to make water bombs! Like her circle of notes that float around her when healing, she sings and gestures and similar to her ult, (but like Childe’s E-skill it just switches between the two), the notes fly out and explode in the direction she sings/aims! You wanted to remind her of her old dream of being recognized, and wanting to help in battle in a more combat way, and besides, you’re sick of women getting regulated to the healing magical role in games/anime fantasy, so yeah. You and Childe are literally evilly giggling to each other in the background as Barbara sends quater notes and lines of music that explode (like how water can sharpen and cut things like Childe’s blades? Yeah he taught her that) so intensely that it cuts into the Pyro Lawlachurl, bringing it to its knees- Barbara accidentally cuts its head off as the finishing blow. While she gasps in a little fear, but mostly shock, Childe jumps up and down and starts cheering.
Mona = got sparkly eyes, nearly snatched the gift out of your hand, you made her some awesome earrings from the character banner wishes! All pretty ombre pink and blue they swirl and look so pretty framing Mona’s face, she only wears them on special occasions despite your claim of everyday use, they also help her figure out where the clearest view of the night sky each night but glowing brighter and brighter when she gets closer to seeing clearly, Mona is almost? weirdly envious?? for her past self that had to suffer thru all the inconvenient cloudy nights lmao
Childe = like anon said, a new pair of knit gloves, using the fur from the snow king boar! he’s amazed they never wear out now, and he totally uses them as an excuse to hold your hands all like “I just can’t get over how soft they are, feel them, you did amazing comrade! even better than some Snezhnayan shops!!”, exactly what you expect he’s leaning into your face and everything- 🙄
Xingqiu = an ao3 account you had a hard time with Xingqiu’s, afterall, he’s from a wealthier family, so he can get mostly what he wants, and you don’t wanna just get him another book… so you kidnapped him to Inazuma! (idk if this is canon, or happened in an event or smth I missed idfc) So, you also kidnapped Albedo for this trip, so that Xingqiu could actually see the impact his writing made overseas! While you intended for this trip to make Xingqiu feel better abt his writing, (and to help Albedo feel appreciated too, despite him not expressing much low self-esteem in his art, compliments heaped upon him def cant hurt, plus u can see him go pink too hehe) you also wanted to surprise him with a author book signing! If he was up for it, of course, which he “I absolutely, definitely, certainly am, my liege!” Kid’s practically hopping in place, as you get him all ready for his book signing (and not rlly Albedo bc he’s always fucking perfect, u dont have to do shit, even his messy hair looks nice 💀) …you also may or may not have given him some hair decorations (to help his asymmetrical cutting, not that it looks super bad, but for a change at least)
Yelan = …it’s official. You are intimidated. It’s only pretty hydro women and Ayato from here on, on your “Gift List”. Needless to say, like a few other allogenes, you wouldn’t know shit about this woman if you didn’t read her lore… it’s not a fine replacement, you don’t think, but with (lots of almond tofu, and osmanthus wine too) dev access to help you, you created another bracelet for Yelan. Inscribed (just like the heirlooms) inside simply says “You Are Not Alone”, with your eight star symbol following after (like a four star but with some flare, and also not the Jewish star lol), it glows an otherwordly gold, a contrast to the bright blues of the other bracelet. Its function is a geo shield, to protect Yelan and any teammates nearby when it’s activated, she can also leave the shielded area in one spot, so she can do her e-skill and still protect people. You’d just casually asked her to meet up with you one day in that teahouse you know she runs for intel, and when you presented her the bracelet, she held it delicately, saying nothing as she examined it, reading the inside. A small smile tugged her lips up, and she slips it on as she sips her tea, “…Well, I’ll have to show this to present this one to the family shrine, I think this more than makes up for the heirloom I failed to keep. A replacement from the Guide of Teyvat themselves… Thank you, my Emperor, for this handwrought gift you bestow upon a mortal such as me. …and thank you, for not leaving me alone.” Yelan bows a little in her seat, sharp blue eyes more softened than you’ve ever seen her, trained on yours. Her hands are together in that same praying motion that gives you the weirdest sense of deja vu…
Kokomi = so you don’t know much about her, as the it seems the character lore for Kokomi you can remember was… lacking, to say the least. Hoyo definitely plays favorites, BUT YOU DON’T!! At least when it comes to gift givining so everyone feels appreciated, you got a pretty book (handmade or bought) and got it/made it kinda small, like the size of the book in her idle animation, bc turns out that’s her diary of sorts. You know the priestess feels if she expresses any opinions that her people will just take her side, or her word as… well, a divine priestess, the weight of her title you suppose. She also keeps track of how many spoons she has! Like what things drain her, and what things make her feel better (big social interactions vs. reading a war treaty book by herself for example) So you made her a bullet journal! (here’s one of my favorite bullet journal youtubers, here’s a flipthru of her completed journal) you didn’t fill out the whole thing, just some example pages, to show her the possibilites! …you were kinda worried bc she turned away at first after delicately accepting it, and since it was just you two, she allowed herself turn back around and start excitedly chatting your ear off as she leaned in- and wow. Kokomi’s eyes really are, dreamy, like cotton candy… and they’re so much prettier when she smiles…
Ayato = …you know exactly what to do. Interrupting his busy schedule (and only actually taking one day out of it actually bother him so he can have the others as a secret vacation hehe) to come over to the Kamisato household and homemake some boba drinks for him, Ayaka, and Thoma to try! Mostly Ayato tho, you got all the syrups, the milks teas, the boba, and luckily, were able to get some help from Xiangling in experimenting in making… popping pearls! (they’re edible boba pearls that are actually filled with juice/syrup flavors and burst on your tounge when you barely bite them! they’ve very sweet, and Inazuma definitely didn’t have any different pearls other than tapioca, those squishy black pearls you see in his regular boba tea) …Ayato is literally holding your hand like he’s about to drop to one knee, this man is down bad for boba (and you) and… are those tears?! Is he tearing up?! “I can’t believe… THE Akitsu Mikami… blessed me, personally, with boba?? With NEW boba teas and pearls I’ve never even seen?! …Thank you, my beloved emperor!” Mans has quite literally gotten on his knees, but bc he’s so tall, he can still comfortably hold both your hands in his bigger gloved ones …Thoma is desperately trying to get Ayato up, Ayaka is getting onto her brother in the background.
Candace = it’s not exactly a traditional gift… but the reason Candace doesn’t wear a lot of her jewelry or finery is because of the hard job she has as a Guardian/in the desert, so you figured giving her more things she can’t even really wear wasn’t the way to go.. So instead! You gather a journal or advice from Ningguang, Keqing, Yelan, Zhongli, and all the others in the Qixing who were willing to help you, and kidnapped Ganyu for a sight seeing trip! (since u and Ganyu has that whole “in between two very different worlds” bond) You brought Ganyu because you know if anybody would be good at managing something/getting it started (like the music fest back for Lantern Rite… that I missed bc I dont understand how lantern rite works 😭😭😭 VIOLENTLY SOBS ITS BEEN 2 YEARS AND I HAVENT GOTTEN A SINGLE LANTERN RITE U GUYS-) it would be Ganyu herself! …and to also give her a break. See Aaru Village suffered from little to no economy before Candace finally negoiated with the elders to let Sumeru merchants travel into town/buy from them/sell to them, but she’s had a rough time keeping the old coots from being dicks about it since, …and it’s also hard to convince the younger generations to come back after many wanted to see the outside world because of this… So what better what to solve two birds with one stone?? GANYU!! And all the economy and business advice you could gather form Liyue! You hope that the village flourishing (and helping Candace cut down on shady merchants) would impress the older generation, yet also get more money in the town so they can dress it up a bit more (like fixing unsteady bridges, also u kidnapped Kaveh to help revitalize their cultural architecture buildings back into life/or help make the simple buildings just prettier) Now Ganyu and her are besties (Candace rlly needed another friend besides just Dehya alone to come out and see her in the desert) and the adepti was very willing to come visit her and Aaru Village to help the economy maintain its footing/run smoothly, and Kaveh also comes and works on it/checks on her/the village! …When you initially showed all the plans to Candace, saying it’ll impress the old by bringing back old designs/architecture plus interest/satisfy the younger generations to know their hometown is advancing and make it more appealing to come back to… The Guardian puts her shield and spear off to the side, she lowers her head, and greets you, bc u kinda just started rambling without saying hello- whoops- , “Salaam aleikum Qore, **I have already become the first Guardian to have been blessed by the gods, to receive this Vision was the only aid I could turn to in trying to help my village, my community… but to be blessed once more? I would never have dared to dream, let alone the Ogdoad Qore… I am grateful on behalf of myself, my village, and all of King Deshret’s people. …truly, I did not expect a gods eyes to turn favorably upon us since my ancestors’ time. Thank you, my Qore.” You just give her a smile back, she taught you the return phrase, so you hope it’s appropiate, “Waaleikum us salam.” :)
Nilou = This woman is consumed by dancing, other than keeping the peace (well, within reason apparently bc she’s okay with a coup-) but you’ve heard how hard it can be on dancers, how plenty of them have to have strong muscles to perform consistently. So, using adepti magic, you’ve enchanted this minakari you’ve painted (a type of metalwork that’s then painted by artists, on Earth countries like Iran, India, Afghanistan, Pakistan make them) like the teapot! It’s a small island that has a dance studio, and more importantly, a spa with hot springs, a sauna, and a room full of medical supplies dancers would need like salves, heating/cooling pads (using pyro/cryo), and space for stretches! Overall, just a place for her to get away from all the people and to heal her body up for the next performance, and after getting it all prepped/packed up with supplies, and showing it to Nilou… she literally had her hands over her mouth the whole walk around the rooms and showing her everything. Nilou had already been shocked you’d painted her a minakari piece, let alone all this! Like some others, she was quick to drop the formalities, and before you could even say “I hope you like it!” she was wrapping her arms around you and squeezing as tight as she could, tearing up and saying how happy she was that someone understood how hard dance can be on the body and how hard it can also be to take care of yourself, and how she can’t possibly show her gratitude- wait a minute. She’s pulled back and gripping you by the shoulders, not even bothering to wipe her eyes, before she swears to give you a dance every year with all the culmination of her work as she learns and makes newer and better dances!! <3
Cryo Allogenes:
Kaeya = horses so he’s actually a calvary captain- you actually wanted something that’d emphasize the handmade part of the gift, to really let Kaeya know somebody out there really cares about him, cares about him in the way that they’ll sit down and think of an idea and think of him, and then work for hours, sewing, drawing, crafting something just for him, to happy about. You make him a small, pocket sized photobook, and have a picture of every person who cares about him in all the slots, and near the end, from his last birthday where you gathered everybody together to celebrate, is a photo of Jean, Klee, Albedo, Sucrose, Venti, Rosaria, Noelle, Amber, even Eula, Diona, Mika, Barbara, and Mona came! But most importantly, you got Diluc to host it at Angel’s Share, and after some convincing, got him to get in the picture, you’re slightly off center, sandwiched by Kaeya and Diluc, where Kaeya is mid-laugh at the center, having just seen Diluc’s embarrassed face. It’s the last one in the mini album, and each photo has an even small message at the bottom, giving Kaeya a message from everybody, just for him. At the very end, with the group photo just before, is one of yourself and him posing together, you having taken him out roaming Mondstadt for the perfect picnic spot, just to give an excuse why you wanted a picture with him. And at the time, he found it a little suspicious, but was just flustered enough he let it slide. But now, opening and unfolding this tiny album, full of smiling friends and caring words, Kaeya gives a small, watery chuckle, you’ve left him a message too. “Take care of yourself Kaeya, because someone out there really cares about you. :) “
Rosaria = After seeing her “nun” outfit, there’s no doubt in your mind that Rosaria is yearning for clothes closer to her preferred aesthetic. So, using your knowledge of punk clothes and modern goth religious aesthetics, you’ve made some pieces for her to try! Some black pumps with metal crosses for heels, yes they’re sharp and this nice shawl with beads, and finally, a nice lacy skirt (no you did not make fucking lace, jesus christ, you’re not a miracle worker, despite the belief of some teyvatians-). All of which, wow, got Rosaria to give you an honest to god… smile. A full, genuine smile from Rosaria… yeah that made all your hard work worth it.
Eula = a book on common manners so Eula is actually great at cooking! So what better chaos to gift to her other than introducing her to Xiangling! Especially since you’ve given the young Liyuean cook recipes from your own world for her to try out, she’s been on a rampage of new things, and so what better new experience than a cook from an entirely different country? You also made a small book of recipes (look up how to make a zine book on youtube it’s actually kinda easy) from your world, different from Xiangling’s because you thought Eula would like different recipes than her. …So needless to say you were then being berated by two chefs for not sharing all the recipes lmao, tho that really just gave them reason to share recipes! Also any new spinoffs Xiangling’s already made from the initial ones you gave her, and now Eula not only graciously thanks you for the recipes, but also her new pen pal! :)
Diona = So, to prep for this gift, you forced converted the Cat’s Tail to a non-alcoholic cat cafe during the daytime, and only in the evenings do they start serving alcohol/cats put up. You also got onto Margaret for hiring a child to make alcohol, so instead have Diona work better hours, and only during the cafe time, so she’s not making alcoholic drinks either. (you also checked in on child labor laws in Mondstadt, and ran some paperwork by Jean just in case) But most importantly, you teach Diona all kinds of new drink recipes to make, like Shirley Temples, smoothies, etc. You even (once again, by getting help from Xiangling and Diluc) made a drink for hangovers, but more importantly, helped her make one called “Sober Up” which magically flushes out the alcohol out of someone’s body, so Diona can finally sneak people a drink that (while still cursed to be well-made since Diona made it) is a trip to drink lol, it’s like a blast of carbonation/electricity to the system and will typically make most people very nauseous (but since magic’s doing it, they dont need to throw up, they’re just sick feeling for an hour depending on how much they drank). Diona nearly cried after she saw the effect on hungover customers, and immediately started sneaking them into her father’s drinks, so now he’s leaning more toward sobriety most days, and after finding out what Diona did, started to talk to his daughter more. The next time you see her, and ask after her father, she just wraps her little arms around your waist, the highest she can reach, you hug her back.
Chongyun = for prep for this gift, you painstakingly, slowly convince Chongyun to accept more and more moments of warmth, like trying some spicy food that’s gone cold, but just away from people so he can be silly out in the Liyuean mountains instead, and to try and use exposure therapy to try and get him used to yin energy/warm/excitable things, rather than the inefficient method of just avoiding it all (as it doesn’t always work/deprives him of so many nice things!! >:[ ). So that way! You can finally! Take him to have fun!!! You haul him (and Xingqiu bc the more the merrier) to go swimming in Luhua Pools, go jumping off all the peaks from one to another paragliding, using cryo to surf down waterfalls, and most importantly, go to a hot springs at the end of the day! Chongyun was worried about them being too hot and activating his yang energy, but you all agreed he had been training to get used to it, so now he when he goes to try it, he just relaxes into the heat. He could feel the tug to get out and run in circles and get excited, but finally, Chongyun could just choose to sit and relax into the warmth with friends instead :)
Ganyu = if I had a nickel for every woman In teyvat who just needs a break I’d be fucking rich …Obviously, a day off. But an ACTUAL day off, with work regulated to others, and unless there’s an Osial level incident 2.0 (fuck his wife, you put Shenhe on duty to protect Liyue just in case) NO ONE. IS. TO. DISTURB. GANYU’S. FIRST. VACATION. IN. DECADES. You get her to show you the prettiest viewing spots in Liyue, and as you go, tell stories from your life on Earth, showing her pictures on your phone (from both the internet and ur photos), to show her how mortal you are on one hand, but then how different you are here, upgrading her weapons and artifacts, and most importantly, her gift, a Teyvat modified cellphone! Albedo and you had been working together for months to try and make something close enough to connect ur two worlds, while introducing him to adeptal magic and other powerful objects like primogems and wishes that you have to help power it, that way the only other person who might understand immediately how it feels to be (literally lol) caught between two worlds can always rely on each other! …Ganyu cried. Yep, tears down her cheeks and everything, “…I- I- don’t even- even know what to say? All this, telling me about your mortal world, helping me get stronger, and now- now this? I may not have much to give in return, other than my company and my bow… but should you ever need me, or even wish for me, I will hold you as steady as I hold together Liyue itself, my Emperor." Ganyu’s smile is so, so, so pretty, and all the prettier now that her soft blue hair and sweet eyes are framed by the sunset, like it’s her own gift back to you.
Qiqi = A backpack for herbs! You’ve made sure to stitch her name into it so in case she forgets it’s hers, she’ll just see her name again, and lots of little pockets so she can carry all the herbs/make deliveries, it looks a little like this but with a goat instead of cow, and some cocouts lmao, literally a “coco-goat” milk backpack! She is now the cutest person in Liyue, everyone agrees, nearly every single person who comes into Bubu Pharmacy gives Qiqi a compliment now, and Baizhu will periodically take a break just so he and Changsheng can coo at her lmao (Qiqi made sure she wrote down in her notebook in big letters next to your name “This person made my cocogoat backpack, remember to thank them during prayer times, and collect lots of fresh herbs for them”)
Shenhe = It’s kind of a lot, but really, at this point, you’ve done more for some of the others so this probably isn’t even scratching the surface of how big of a gift you can give, so why not. Going full steam ahead, you furnish her a house at the edge of town, so that she’s not overwhelmed by all the human traffic/people, but still close enough to make the friends she wants! When you first show her the dining/living room so plenty of guests can come over, and begin to tour her through it, the strongest woman you’ve probably ever known gently holds your shoulders and stops you from speaking, and turns you to face her, Shenhe’s eyes are sharp with observation as they roam your face, and then settle on your own wide eyes. Her eyes soften, and a small smile warms her usual stern face, (idc how tall you are, she’s taller, I fucking promise) as she leans down a little to look at you closely in the eyes, “Thank you for being a kind god. You did not have to be so generous to me, and yet here you are. If you ever feel like you’re an outsider in Teyvat, in any country or company you find yourself in, please, promise me you’ll come here. Come home to me?” ✨💘✨
Ayaka = You manage to get her away from her duties to take her out to Sumeru! Mostly so you can introduce her to Nilou, see her performance, and the flourishing arts that now fill Sumeru City’s streets, and more importantly, a dress you made so she could dance with Nilou + dance on stage, she wasn’t confident enough/didn’t want to dance for a crowd, so it’s just you three or just you two after awhile. Ayaka looks the happiest she’s been in awhile, more so than you ever saw in game, and it’s… almost like a breath of fresh air to see her away from what you felt was such an isolating environment, even after the Vision Hunt Decree was over. For her last dance, Ayaka does so alone, a little after the sun has set, so it’s all blue, and the stars are coming out, finally, you get to see an even better version of the dance she gave the traveler that night. She only opens her eyes at the end, to give you the giddiest smile you’ve ever seen on her, cheeks cute and plumped up bc she’s smiling so hard, and bows to you (Ayaka’s thanked you a million times, but she doesn’t need to, you can feel how happy she is just from this)
Mika = THE BOY!! One of the most boys to ever boy in all of Teyvat!! Your boy!!! :D What a boy, he nearly fainted when you handed over his gift one day, and you had to reach out and steady him, then hand him it again 😭 It’s similar to the Marauder’s Map, since you enchanted it (once again, what’s the point of dev access if I can’t make gifts for my skrunklies?) and since you don’t want it to end up in bad hands/get spyed on, it only shows itself with a phrase as well “I wish upon a golden star, to know this land as well as its player.” and it’ll show him everyone in public spaces in Mondstadt, not private homes, but like the plaza, the church, the Knights of Favonius, etc. He thanks you every single time he sees you for the map, as it’s both fascinating to him to have a proper well-drawn map of the city of Mondstadt (you copied it from the Teyvat in game map, but there were some buildings missing bc they’re more real here/more fleshed out as a irl city) but that just made Mika even happier bc he can go and map them out!! Literally can’t talk to you bc all he’s saying is “T-TH-TH-THANK-THANK YOU ALL FURST-!!!” before running away most of the time lol
Layla = An embroidered tiny pillow for her to easily clip onto her bag/fit in it, and take on the go with her! (this but the text just says “Sweet Dreams Layla ♡” ) that you’ve also added scent to, including some sleep inducing magics, so she’s guarenteed to sleep well and efficiently when she uses it! She blushed so hard you thought she was sick at first when you gave it to her, and she also used the pillow as a shield to hide her face as she thanked you lmao, and she made you a pillow in return! …even if she thinks it’s not as good as yours, both craft wise and function, Layla worked for weeks on it! …lol now ur the one hiding ur face behind a pillow (this but they’re all plants of sumeru)
Aloy = …if you had a nickel for every person you’ve provided with a house, you’d have two nickels. Which isn’t a lot, but it’s weird it happened twice… Poor damn heroine just got dragged from one world to the next, just as the last one finally was at peace, now she’s here in Teyvat, where nothing’s familiar, the entire world is set up different, people are nicer and more open here, and there’s still threats looming on its horizon. Needless to say, she is tired, and misses her own homeworld. You really wish on her behalf that Hoyo hadn’t done a crossover, but since she’s here, you figure you might as well make it easier on her. You’ve made another teapot-like adeptal magic container, so she can have a place all to herself, and given her a ticket to your own, afterall, if anybody knows what’s its like to get yanked to another world, specifically Teyvat, it’d be the travelers and yourself, and sure enough as time goes one, Aloy becomes closer with you all, and begins to finally feel a sense of familiarity, she wraps an arm around your shoulders the first time she saw you tried to make her own personal teapot place emulate her homeworld. The widest grin you’ve seen on her face, she gives you a squeeze, “It’s just been one adventure after the next, and when we started out, you were just another stranger in a world I didn't understand. But after everything we've been through, I can say this for certain: My bow is yours, now and always. Thank you for the second home, my king.” Aloy says teasingly, laughing at the face you make.
Geo Allogenes:
Noelle = goddamn when will the busy women trend END these poor souls Motherfucker, you’re gift to Noelle was to knight the damn girl yourself. No, but you nearly talked Jean’s ear off for an hour, after gathering evidence (both from eyewitnesses, and Noelle herself, including other knights and Jean herself) about why the literal fuck Noelle wasn’t a Knight of Favonius yet, and why she should be. After genuinely shaking Jean’s nerves a little, she agreed, and finally, Noelle was going to knighted along with any other potential recruits during the testing season, (as people with high reputations, which, once again, using your god status for all its worth, could recommend new recruits) but most importantly… You gave her a 5-star claymore, which, you do have to somewhat work on yourself physically in teyvat now, but your dev access lets you cheat a little (like the cooking meter on cooking dishes, you’re the goddamn cooking god when hosting guests hehe) so you also are allowed to edit it, like adding a Geo-bonus to the weapon itself! When the ceremony for knighthood was going, and pretty much all of Mondstadt came to finally see Noelle get knighted, you made a fun show of walking out where you were hiding and replacing Jean, to knight Noelle yourself. She’s gone completely red in the face, and is starting to sway a little in her down on one knee position, as you gently place the blade on both shoulders, and grin at her as you turn and pull out the claymore for her. She actually does end up falling over, pale as a ghost, whoops-
Albedo = internet access so he can become a fucking god basically the alchemist is a hard guy to make a gift for, another person you’re a little afraid high-quality handmade gifts would impress him more… so you worked hard, and eventually you managed to make three big notebooks for Albedo, one with lined paper, one bulleted, and one blank for sketches (you did the title page a decent sketch of his pretty face smiling and “For Albedo” underneath, and while that one had a picture, the other two had just the words) and you also loaned him your cellphone for awhile, and suggested the idea of a laptop to make for himself, as he already managed to get you connected to Earth’s internet again, that’s part of the reason you customized/made him notebooks, so he could research from the internet and write down any notes he wanted! …wow. you really did it. after explained all this, and leaving him notes about the laptop idea as loose paper stuck inside one of them, you managed… to get Albedo to… smile. At you. Like a FULL smile, pretty lips, wide smile, and flushed cheeks-!! Albedo caught the notebooks you almost dropped.
Ningguang = what do you get the woman that has everything? so you started to think of things that’d make an experience, and after remembering her lore about her making a chess game, you decided a board game would be good! And if you make the little pieces, it’d be one of a kind too! (she’s the type that really loves handmade gifts/as long as you put effort in it doesnt matter how “bad” it looks to her, she’ll believe it’s still good <3) …So you made a Teyvat version of Monopoly. You figured the business part would be in her realm of expertise, and maybe she could use it to play with business associates or friends, and of course, she’s a competitive woman, so she thinks it’s great, and even asked permission that a marketable version be made (one that’s not nearly as nice quality as hers from you obviously)! Ningguang also treated you very well as a thank you for making it for her, a nice dinner at Liuli Pavilion, with a useful gift of places you haven’t seen in Teyvat yet bc it’s more expansive now that you’re physically here!! You may have gotten over-excited about it… and she may have chuckled at you… and you may have gotten flustered after she rested her pretty hand on yours for nearly half the dinner as you stuttered thru and explanation of the game…
Zhongli = …what do you get the man that has everything (ningguang problem 2.0)?? Well, since you thought of something for her that was an experience a little bit, yet also one of a kind, you figured the same path for the previous God of Wealth/literally invented money/etc. would do, plus he’d the type to deeply appreciate handmade gifts too! Using a few chunks of Light Realm Core, 3 Masterless Starglitter, 1 Intertwined Fate, and 1 Condensed Resin, to make a nigh indestructible Ginko leaf hair pin, which also to replace his last pin, which while not broken, was getting old and beat up (he’s immortal he doesn’ notice these things unless they’re like magically long lasting items lol). But in a few spots are these peach beads like this instead of all white beads, like on the ring both have symbols of longevity, and are usally associated with immortals, you wanted to make something that’d also hold memories (hence the resin, from leylines) so if the erosion ever took him, Zhongli could hold the pin and see some of his favorite memories played back (like misty glittering gold projections)! When you told him all this, the materials, (he obv knew the symbols) and the intentions, and then handed him the gift, his soft smile got bigger and bigger, until you could see him small fangs (❤️‍🔥) and then he turned around? You were confused, until he look over his shoulder, his eyes flashing gold in the sunlight, “Will you do me the honor, my Emperor?” OH- you unclip his old geo cor lapis one, and pull his hair up into more of a low bun, and put the hair piece in. the golden ginko leaves chime softly in the breeze. The old god turns back to you (idc how tall you are, he’s taller, and he had to crouch a little so you could reach lol) and gives you that blinding, beautiful smile again, the kind that makes his eyes look warm and happy. He takes your hand delicately, like you’re made of something fragile instead of stars and magic stronger than any he’s ever seen, “Truly, you bless me too generously, my Emperor. Thank you, for caring for a forgotten god like me, for caring about my heart.” …Zhongli presses a soft chaste kiss to your knuckles, right on the middle finger’s knuckle, his lips are warm and so, so soft, like they’re barely even there. <3
Yunjin = a bit difficult because she’s so theater focused in life, but you figure since she does solo shows a lot, she’ll still be the one to benefit the most from your gift, you made some floating plaustrite lanterns to help heft some platforms for more stage space/cool effects! (this but a little more detail, you painted some bamboo and a few simple adepti on them) Like putting props up there or lights to aim on actors, or even actors themselves since the floating rock is steady enough! Yunjin practically squealed (which immediately made every actor in the vicintity be like “YUNJIN!! UR VOICE WILL GO HOARSE STOP-”) and gather the whole troupe to thank you! But she especially told you that although she already intended for you to have front row seats every time you came to see her plays, she especially wanted to get some stories from your life, or even just your favorites from Earth for her to perform for you!! (she even suggested that one of the platforms could be your special seat, like an opera box seat lol)
Itto = you know that belt buckle he wears that’s just an Oni head? Yeah, you made him a second belt but with a onikabuto beetle as the buckle instead! (kinda like this) but a small enough it’s not inconvenient and poking his stomach, which you definitely got a Inazuman blacksmith to help out, you mostly painted it, and when you show Itto the belt, mans literally just wraps his buff arms around you like a hug but then just starts spinning you rapidly, and lets out the highest pitch “EEEEEEEEEEE-!!!” you’ve ever heard him make (and you’ve given him a few trinkets before, so this is a new record wow). No, it doesn’t matter to Itto how much you weigh, have you seen his abs?! He says as he’s still got you a little off the ground, and is now walking away with your limp body and wearing his new belt, “This, and a proper meal to thank you are the bare minimum, my wonderful emperor! Come on, the gang’s already there anyway, you gotta try my Granny Oni’s food, and I’ll make something too! My best, most special, sandwich, Way of the Strong!! Y’know, because if anybody deserves it, it’d be the strongest, and sweetest, you!!”
Gorou = since teyvat isn’t exactly the pinnacle of advanced civilization, though there are some advancements sure like the Kamera, there are still a fair amount of things that’re just left up to locals to produce and make using whatever process they’ve got, regardless of efficiency, and one of those is soap. Yep, soap. Earth is more advanced when it comes to beauty products, but also hygiene products, and Gorou has a hard time maintaining his tail he’s said when he’s stressed/overworked. So, you used some knowledge from your interdimensional smartphone (love u Albedo) to find a homemade recipe to make soap! (…for dogs, but you don’t know if he’d find it offensive… so you don’t tell him LMAO) and you even made it a cute shape (just so when you handed it over, he’d open it and of course, go all red all the way down his neck even, hehe, (he secretly liked it)
You towards all of Teyvat, except it's not even their birthdays (idk if u want it to be it can)
PLEASE LET KNOW IF ANY LINKS/PICS ARE INACCURATE FOR A CULTURE/MISLABELED ETC.
Me after writing all this:  _」(´ཀ`」 ∠)__
… so I may have hyperfixated a little too hard on this one.
Did the OG asker want this? …probably not…
Did anyone ask for this?? …no.
…did I do it anyway….…yes.
…sorry?
(I promise I only thought to do this because there are so many characters left out in favor of the more popular ones for most SAGAU posts, and bc i never want any of my babes to feel any less loved than any others if I was actually there in Teyvat… you get… this mess.)
sorry!
Safe Travels,
💀♒
☆MY BELOVEDS☆
@karmawonders / @0rah-s / @randomnatics / @glxssynarvi / @nexylaza / @genshin-impacts-me / @wholesomey-artist / @thedevioussmirk / @the-dumber-scaramouche
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cheeeeseburger · 3 months
Text
Text me first and I'll definitely text you back
Lando Norris x Reader
Masterlist
A/N: English is not my first language, apologies for the mistakes! Enjoy!
It was 1 am, and you could not sleep. LIke at all. Your room was too hot, too stuffy, but also too cold at the same time. Your bed felt empty. To pass time, you were scrolling on your phone, when suddenly a perfect distraction popped up. It was a notification from your ex, Lando Norris. You two hadn’t talked in a hot minute.
Hey
I thought I had blocked you
Guess not
Too bad
I heard you broke up with that other guy
Yeah lol
He seemed nice tho.
Why do you care??? You didn’t even know him
Relax, I just wanted to check up on you
Well, reminding me of how great my ex was is a great way too do it, dumbass
Why are you so fucking rude to me? You’re nice to everyone
Don’t worry, all my exes get the same treatment, you’re not special xoxo
Wow ok.
Glad to see we’re on the same page!
I don’t think we are tho
What do you mean?
Idk why you’re treating me like shit
Huh? Probably cause we’re not together anymore?
You used to be so nice to me before
Are you drunk or something? Maybe high?
No?
Then why are you not getting that I’m not going to be as loving, because we BROKE UP!
You’re so mean, I don’t recognize you
Cry about it with Jay
Who tf is Jay?
The guy I just broke up with
Oh ok. Did you change your hair colour because of it?
Yeah, it’s my post break-up look.
It looks bad.
Omg, you’re calling me rude? You’re so fck rude.
Sorry, but you should go back to the colour you had when we were dating
Did you just text me at 1 am to hate on my hair? Bitch
No
If you think I’m desperate for rebound sex and I’ll fall right into your bed, you’re dreaming buddy.
I just wanted to talk to you, but I don’t even know why I bother
Idk why either tbh
Do you not want to talk to me ever again?
I mean, that was the plan lol
The two years we shared together mean nothing?
They used to, yeah. That’s called moving on.
Just like you’re going to do to that guy?
Yes. If it makes you feel better, I still sleep with your hoodie sometimes, while I threw all his stuff out.
You do? That’s cute
Don’t get any ideas. I also still have the hoodie of my boyfriend before you
Wow, you sure know how to make a guy feel special
Hey, you texted me first. Idk what you expected
I expected you to be nice to me. You used to be so sweet
Don’t worry, the other guys still find me sweet xoxo
I’m so sick of your attitude. Are you trying to make me jealous or something? Or do you just like to be a bitch to me?
You’re the mean one, actually.
I think I will block you.
Do it, pussy
I don’t ever want to talk to you again
Ok wait, no. I’m sorry, Lando. For real
Thank you, finally.
I can’t believe I’m suggesting this, but would you like to grab lunch sometime? Or coffee?
Damn, ok. I did not expect that
It’s fine if you don’t want to
No, no. I want to. What about that dinner that we used to go to? Next Thursday?
Good location, can it be Thursday in two weeks tho? I want to have time to change my hair colour lmao
Okay. I’ll see you there at 12?
See you there, Lando.
Goodnight, sweet dreams
What the hell was that?
Two weeks later, your nerves were about to be the death of you. You were pacing your bedroom, frantically picking the perfect outfit. How do you dress to impress your ex you’re sure you’re going to fall right back for? You finally ended up chosing a cute dress that gave you a great silhouette.
Little did you know, Lando was doing the same, trying to find a shirt that would make him look good for you. He really wanted to make a good impression. This was kind of an interview, and he was applying for the role of the ex-boyfriend that you want to get back with.
When you entered the dinner, the déjà vu was overwhelming. Lando was already sitting at the booth that used to be your booth, the one where you first kissed, the one where he used to let his hand slide underneath your dress. You had worn a dress with that very same memory in mind.
“Hi.” You gave him a warm smile. Gosh, he looked good. He got up to give you a small hug. He smelled even better than you remembered. He seemed to think you looked nice to, judging from his eyes that looked you up and down and his slight blush.
“Hey. You look gorgeous.” He immediately noticed your hair that you had dyed back to the colour he preferred.
“You look good too, Lando. Great, even.” He seemed pleased at your comment.
“No trouble finding the place, I hope?” You laughed at his joke and you both sat down on opposite sides of the booth.
“Don’t worry, even though you did not pick me up, we’ve been here enough that I remember the directions by heart.” You stuck your tongue at him.
“I can pick you up, next time.” His eyes were full of hope.
“Next time?” This time, it was your voice that was full of hope.
The waitress interrupted you to give you the menus. You shared a knowing smile with Lando.
“Is it still a Caesar salad for you? With a side of fries?”
“And a burger for you?” You two laughed.
“It seems like things are still the same, huh?” You rested your head on your hand to give him a dreamy look.
“They haven’t changed at all, no.” He grabbed your other hand to put it in his on the table. You felt sparks at the tip of your fingers, but they quickly moved all over your body. This was going way more smoothly than you had expected. The waitress went over to note your order, and you couldn’t help but to feel thrilled at the familiarity of it all.
“So, how have you been?” Lando asked.
“Good, good, you?” Small talk was usually difficult, but it was horrible when it was with your ex.
“Good too.” Oh no, you were not about to spend the entirety of your lunch date with basic questions.
“Listen, Lando. I wanted to apologize for the other night. I was rude for no reason, and I’m sorry.” He rubbed little circles on your hand with his thumb.
“It’s fine, really. I wasn’t so nice either.” He laughed in embarrassment, but you just smiled at him.
“So, we’re good then?” You really hoped you were.
“We are good.” You shook his hand to seal the deal. The handshake hid a thousand more meanings than just “we’re good”. It was filled with “I’m glad we’re seeing each other again” and “why did we ever stop?”. The waitress brought your food, and you ate in silence for a few minutes, just enjoying the moment.
“We should get ice cream after that,” You suggested shyly. Getting ice cream was code for “I don’t want this date to stop yet”.
“That was always the plan. I’m not a cheap date.” You laughed at him.
“It would be a crime to eat here without getting ice cream after. It was our tradition when we dated, remember?” He smiled at you.
“Of course, I remember. I also remember what came after.” You instantly blushed. A typical date for you and Lando always ended in his bed.
You finished eating. Lando picked up the bill, as usual.
“Thank you for paying, Lando. You know that it can be my turn to pay sometimes?”
“Nonsense. I’m trying to impress you. Is it working?” He smirked.
“Yeah, it’s working, baby. A little too well.” You flushed, because the word baby had slipped off your tongue so easily that you didn’t notice until you saw his face. He was clearly happy to see you using it again. When he put his hand in the small of your back to guide you towards the exit, you didn’t say anything. And when you walked towards the ice cream shop and your hands brushed, you put yours in his.
“I’m going to have a small chocolate sundae please, and he’ll have a large caramel sundae. Thank you!” You ordered the ice cream, once again remembering what you two always get.
“I’m happy that we’re out here together again,” said Lando, in a moment of vulnerability. You could not resist any longer. You grabbed him by the collar of his shirt and kissed him. The kiss was sweeter than the ice cream you were about to eat. “Me too, baby. So damn happy,” you replied as you pulled away, blushing. The smile he gave you made you want to kiss him again a thousand times.
You sat near a window to enjoy your sundaes. Lando looked positively jealous of your spoon. When it was time to leave, he put your hand in his.
“I had a great time today,” he said, outside of the shop.
“Me too. Do you think we could do it again?” You asked shyly.
“Anytime.” You got on your tiptoes to lock your arms behind his neck and to kiss him. You two must have looked adorable to anyone passing by. This kiss felt exactly like the first one you and Lando shared, when you first started seeing each other. When you got back to your feet, he tucked away a few loose strands of hair behind your ear.
“I like your hair.”
“Thanks. I changed it because of you,” you replied, laughing.
“You shouldn’t have. I was just mad, the other night. You looked beautiful then too.” You looked away, embarrassed at his compliment.
“I guess I better go, then.” He immediately protested. “No don’t go yet. We can go back to my place if you’d like. Or we can just grab coffee if you prefer!” It was cute to see him rambling.
You kissed him on the cheek. “Your place is more than fine, baby.” Lando gave you a huge smile and took your hand to guide you towards his car.
“I’m glad you’re coming home with me. It’s what I was hoping for,” he said as he was opening your car door for you.
“Me too, baby. We can pick up my car tomorrow morning.” He winked at you.
“Or the next day. Or the day after.” What a flirt.
You were probably not going to stay single for very long.
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rubyreduji · 1 year
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hey jj many many congrats for 3k+1!!! how do you think svt will react that their s/o is a virgin in the heat of the moment— like if they are making out or something—
— join the sleepover!! 🧸️
ooh okay hmmm this one made me think but hopefully it's good! im kinda going off the impression like the reader mentions it off handedly so here you go:
seungcheol - would stop right away and like ask if you're comfortable and make sure he wasn't pushing boundaries or anything and would like keep checking in on you
jeonghan - im sorry but he'd lowkey think it was hot like...but he'd also like telling you he does't want to pressure you into anything and it would be cool if you if didn't want to go further
joshua - would help guide you through everything, like telling you step by step stuff and overall just making the experience super comfortable and less scary
junhui - he'd assure you that that's okay and then would make a joke about how he could help you become not a virgin
soonyoung - would get super flustered because like he did not know that and could not tell and then he'd probably make a joke to ease the tension
wonwoo - he'd freeze up for a moment, process that information, and then tell you that it's okay and that he'd be honored to be your first time if you'd like that and then he'd walk you through each step and help you learn
jihoon - "oh" he would just be shocked at first but then he'd be super casual about it just like asking if you want to continue and then doing things by your speed
seokmin - he would get all shy and blushy even thought you're the virgin like sir read the room...but like it's cute and then he's super gentle and caring
mingyu - would freak out tbh but only because he would be afraid he did something wrong/would do something wrong
minghao - he kinda treats you normal, like he's still attentive about it, but he doesn't want to treat you any differently just because you have less experience/doesn't want you to feel like it's weird that you're a virgin
seungkwan - he would be empathetic and then go into a story about his first time and how it went horribly and would accidently make you terrified of having sex
vernon - would be a bit awkward but like...not in a bad way like he just wouldn't know what to do in that situation but he'd kinda figure out just asking if you want to continue and taking things slow when you say you do
chan - yall are probably both virgins and he'd pull some shit like "me too omg"
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h-harleybaby · 1 year
Text
Collab time guys 💅💅💅
I have problems I will ADMIT but so does Lime and Fae so me and Fae are doing a collab and it’s like, my first I’m so excited
I’m posting the hcs and Fae’s posting the fic soon so make sure to check out @imm0rtalken
cough cough btw this is plus sized reader but it’s not mentioned too much rn cough cough
Pervy Butters collab
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• Butters is so the type to eat you out while he’s thrusting up all cutely and like, humping the air and cumming without touching himself because he gets off on getting you off. He’s someone who’s def more focused on your pleasure than his own
• You’re gonna question me but when he’s eating you out when you’re on your back he’s gonna have a pillow under his hips that he humps while he eats you out
• He’s not only a panty sniffer but he’s a panty stealer too 💅💅💅💅 HE FR HAS A SHRINE IN HIS CLOSET WHERE HE KEEPS THE PANTIES OF YOURS THAT HE’S STOLEN!!
• He has a super small collection of your panties and shirts that you’re never gonna see like, ever again. Ofc there’s a few that he’ll return because he feels really bad about them but I can guarantee you they’ve been covered in his cum and washed before they’re returned to your dresser
• There may or may not be some mysterious and very faint stains on them but you won’t question it, it probably just got like that in the wash… it was cum stains that wouldn’t quite wash out
• Butters was soooooo nervous about stealing them too because it’s at least the 2nd thing he’s ever stolen, the first being your shirts
• Like I said before, mans is literally obsessed with you and he doesn’t exactly know how to handle it. He uses your shirts as pillowcases (tell me he don’t have a shit ton of pillows) because it smells like you and he literally loves it cough cough he buries his head into those pillows and inhales your scent like there’s no fucking tomorrow cough cough
•He may or may have not went into your room to fuck with your curtains so you can’t close them and so he has like, constant access to your room. He just wants to look at your pretty face, what can I say 🤷‍♀️
• He totally asks Kenny about it though and he’s always kinda asking him for tips on how to handle things and stuff. He’s always going on asking what to do if he’s obsessed and how to ask them out ya know? Kenny’s his wingman fr
• Butters even admits to him that he’s stolen some of your stuff and Kenny’s just like “oh yeah I’ve stolen some chicks panties before, maaaaan that was a good night” and it gives Butters the idea to start stealing your panties
• Both Cartman and Kenny have walked in on Butters with his shrine, he probs isn’t sniffing them at the time but just looking at them with this like, almost twinkle in his eyes? Bros waaaay too sloppy it’s like he wants to get caught 🙄
• Kenny’s reaction is more excited Tbh, he’s like “dude who’s are those?! WHERE’D YOU GET THEM AND I CAN HAVE-“ . He’s fr too excited for it and he’s kinda proud of his friend?
• Cartman’s kinda weirded out by it and asking honestly too many questions. He’s like “why tf are you holding panties?? ARE THEY YOURS OR SOMETHING YOU’RE A PERV LIKE THAT???”
• Anywaysssssss
• Butters literally loves eating you out and he adores having you sit on his face, he’s definitely gripping your thighs to keep you on his face while he eats you out because he doesn’t wanna stop
• Did I mention this is a plus sized reader?? PLUS SIZE READER AND HER SCRAWNY ASS BF BUTTERS WHO WANTS ALL HER WEIGHT ON HIM BECAUSE HE LOVES HOW IT FEELS!!!
• I dunno, it just feels right ya know?? Scrawny love stuck, completely obsessed Butters buried between your thighs as he grips onto them begging you to let him give you another orgasm while he’s literally been cumming completely untouched because he just loves you that much
• He overstims the absolute fuck out of you because he gets sooooooo into it and would def live under you, eating you out for hours if you let him
• Butters would totally beg you to sit on his face and for you to cum on his tongue because he loves the taste of you
• “Please darling? Just one more time on my face? I promise I’ll be good for you”
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Hcs for greasers with a GN!goth s/o who moved to town, and everyone, both greasers and socials are afraid of them, because everyone thinks they’re a “witch”
<twinning with @sadie-bug345 btw go check out her blog it’s amazinggggg here’s the link to her hc for this>
Ponyboy Curtis
-he was definitely afraid of you at first, and he 10/10 believed you could actually brew potions but also secretly thought you were cool and interesting
-he was SUPER intimidated by you
-but one day got enough courage to approach you when you were reading under a tree and found out that you were pretty chill and not yk a witch (he does ask tho, just it case)
-Y’all hit off and you showed him some of your music which he actually liked!
-eventually you guys started dating n stuff which was only surprising to those who didn’t know Pony that well
-you go on library/reading + music dates a lot
-Not a lot of Socs mess with him now that he’s always with his witch
-Fr no Socs mess with him he has such a scary dog privilege with you
-matching bandanas + belts
Johnny Cade
-he’s so in love with alt people honestly
-didn’t believe you were a witch and knew weirdos get a bad rap
-he wasn’t scared of you because he thought you were a witch, He was just scared to actually go up and talk to you
-he kind of always admired you from afar cuz yall had a similar vibe and you went to the lot a lot (hehe)
-One day after a long pep talk in the mirror he got the courage to go up and talk to you
-you guys really got along and started dating!
-when you first chatted he admired one of your best rings and you just gave it to him
-(he hasn’t taken it off since istg)
-you did his eyeliner one time and it looked SOOOO GOOD
-10/10 he does matching rings n belts and sometimes small makeup with you
-you guys are v cute together and honestly make so much sense, you’re also his scary dog privledge
Sodapop Curtis
-he saw you and was like ohhhh that’s why they call them a witch
-honestly surprised he liked you bc you aren’t usually his type but opposites attract yk
-he finds your style exotic and so different from his own it opens up his world
-you meet buying snacks at his gas station and he does his usual charming boy personality, suprised when you don’t respond to his flirtation and roll your eyes
-after lots of him flirting and you rejecting (more playfully over time) he finally manages to get you on a date with him
-you guys actually hit it off rlly well
-you guys are like golden retriever x black cat and compliment eachother soooo well
-tbh people saw it coming because yk opposites attract
-he tries to copy ur makeup one time and it did NOT end well 😭💅
-yall turn heads fr
Darry Curtis
-he didn’t necessarily wary of you because of the rumors, he’s just a traditionalist and not rlly used to seeing different people
-so when you come into town you rock his world
-one day your walking along just minding your own business when he grabs your arm and is like “wait” as if he isn’t stopping you from literally moving
-“so uh, what with the, uh, getup?”
“Idk man I just like to dress this way….”
-you guys start talking and actually become good friends
-after a few months he asks you out
-you guys are a pretty stable couple, and ponyboy definitely thinks of you as his rlly cool older sister
-I think yall are the most surprising
-he’s the most likely to change his wardrobe to match yours, def goes all out. Like not tooo far but he changes all his outfits to be vaguely goth
Dallas Winston
-was he a little (a lot) scared of you because of the rumors? Hell yes. Was he going to show that? Hell no.
-probs approached you on a dare or some shit 💀
-made a rude remark or joke so you slapped him and he was kinda surprised such a quiet thing could leave his face that red
-he was kinda in love with that ngl and loved your spunk
-he bothered you everyday after that
-back and fourth after much banter (enemies to lovers energy)
-he managed to actually get you to go on a date with him
-POWER COUPLE FR
-people are SO scared when they see yall walking down the streets yall are sooo intimidating together fr
-matching belts and rings
Two Bit Matthews
-you guys probs met in the back of the classroom
-he made some joke like “Damn, how’d you get out of your coffin this mornin’?!
-to which you responded with an eye roll and a chuckle
-you guys actually end up cracking jokes the whole period and laughing a little too loud
-he finally asks you out and you say yes
-you guys go out and make fun of Socs together and have a grand time
-you guys kind of started dating a bit immaturely, but you actually get to something that’s a lot more mature and have really deep conversations, you kind of ground him, and he kind of bring the humor out of you a bit
-he def takes advantage of the fact people are scared of you and you both jumpscare people and just have so much fun
-best Halloween couple fs
-overall pretty solid
-matching shirts
Steve Randle
-he probably heard the rumors and thought they were stupid and he was the least phased by your look
-I mean don’t get me wrong he liked it but he wasn’t gonna tell you that right away
-you don’t like eachother at first but after you start talking you start to appreciate eachother
-he asks you out and you say yes
-you guys are sooo cute n iconic
-you sometimes play music out loud when he fixes cars and just vibe together
-the EGO boost he gets from your compliments on his style
-he wears matching rings and shirts with you
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