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sst0rmm · 2 months

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𐙚 ‧₊˚ ⋅ in the mornings ⋆ ˚｡⋆୨୧˚

ft: rin.

notes: just pure sunshine fluff ✧˖°.

part/series: 1.0 2.0 3.0

wc: 1328

he's doesn't wake you up, and prefers to let you sleep the night away to your heart's content (sleeping makes you happy), and he notices and cares about that.

it's the little things....

rin wakes up early before you. he's always been an early bird, up as soon as the sun rises, and a sleepy saturday is no exception. so you're left to be woken up by the birds chirping and the sun shining and the smell of your favorite food wafting through the open doorway. and you'll get up, slowly walk your way downstairs.

the moment's surprisingly domestic, rin's shirtless and clad in an apron (even though it's a little drafty downstairs), you're in his shirt, and for a second there's nothing but the sound of sizzling bacon reverberating on the walls and making you feel completely at home.

"did you sleep well?" you smile, because you suddenly feel refreshly rejuvenated.

"yeah, i really, really did."

rin is SUCH a sweetheart dasifjsdiofjjjsfdi LMAOO like...

you cannot prove me wrong once he gets to know you he's literally warm and allasdfjdfoi

and his cooking's mad scrumptious i am telling u

breakfast, as usual is warm and lifts you up. down to your veins, the utter core and heart of your being, because you can tell that he made it with love, and that's most important. and once you're done, you make a move to go do the dishes, but he won't let you. (the man's serious, what can i say?)

"i can do it-"

"don't worry," rin pulls you into a swift hug and you're suddenly surrounded by a cocoon of strong, comforting arms, "i got it."

"but you already cooked? we should split-"

rin looks at you fondly, amusement glimmering in teal eyes. it's a look that can stop time, shatter you, and pick you up anew. it's the look of the sunsets you saw together last september, and it's that look of pure adoration and love.

"you should rest," he whispers as he presses a soft kiss to your cheek that leaves your stomach whirling and your nerves dancing alight. "you're worth it."

oh if you only knew HOW BAD i need a rin in my life

we all need a rin tbh because he's sooo sweet and so caring when he's comfy around you

+ a little jelly bcs !!!!

this next scene is utter beauty... you'll see...

waking up is hard when you're utterly entangled in the strong arms of the one you love.

the sun hums softly through the windows, blanketing everything in golden radiance. a clear, blue expanse of sky gazes down at you from above. the clock blinks at you in soft red letters the time (11 P.M.), but neither of you seem to make a move to get up.

it’s the power of a sleepy saturday.

a soft murmur (the doorbell) cuts through your haze of thoughts. “i’ll get it-” rin starts but you push the covers back onto him, pressing him back down onto the soft mattress.

“don’t worry, i got it,” you smile, and he wraps you in a warm hug.

“if you’re gone too long, i’ll miss you!” he calls over your shoulder. you smile back at him. it’s so easy to fall back into that comforting, perfect rhythm, where it’s just the two of you. indelible touches and soft warmth, broken down to sand, it’s just the two of you. against the world, fighting together, the two of you.

your heart blossoms with a warmth that swells from your head down to the very core of your being, and sits happily there, a pleasant, steady heat that makes the silence feel so full.

at your door’s a cute, smiling pizza man.

“delivery for y/n?” he smiles down at you, while holding that cardboard box.

“thanks so much!” you turn to grab your wallet from the counter, and come back right after. the air’s crackling with some unspoken tension, and you feel and hear movement behind you, but you disregard it.

inhaling the aroma of cheesy goodness, you feel oddly refreshed.

the man looks you up and down, and you suddenly realize you’re in a ratty set of pajamas and cross your arms over yourself a little self-consciously.

“the weather’s gorgeous today, isn’t it?” the man smiles and you find it in yourself to smile back. he’s just being nice, you chide yourself.

“yeah-” you start, “it really, really is.”

as you move to swipe your credit card across the gleaming screen of the touchless payment scanner, your feet get caught on the rug and you fall down, down, down…

right into the pizza guy’s arms. as your cheeks color and flame, and you murmur a hasty apology and scramble away, the man smirks.

“fell for me already, didn’t you?”

you wince. he’s cute, with warm eyes and dimples, but he’s no rin itoshi. “actually,” you start, “i’m flattered, but i’m not interested.”

the guy looks at you in surprise. “what, do you have a boyfriend or someth-”

immediately, rin’s presence materializes by you as if summoned. it’s a little uncanny, you think to yourself. and you have to admit, seeing rin stare down his opposition is a sight to see.

it doesn’t help the other guy’s case that rin’s fit as anything, either. just the glare he gives his opponents is enough to make them recoil. he crosses his arms over his broad chest and gives the delivery guy a penetrating stare. (you feel a little bad for this poor pizza man). but also, it fills you with molten heat and just love that rin would even care about these little things.

“yeah,” rin drawls underneath the summer sun, “she does have a boyfriend.” he wraps his bicep around your waist and tugs you close.

“so if i were you,” rin leans in towards the guy and whispers, “i’d probably leave now.”

somehow, the pressured worker manages to keep his wits intact. “you haven’t paid-”

“i’ll handle it, y/n,” rin whispers in your ear and waves you off. as you sit down on your sofa and calm your racing heart, you’re hit with such a wave of emotion that your heart weeps. because you’re rin itoshi’s, and he doesn’t care if the whole world knows it.

rin’s by your side minutes later and he sees your tears. “why’re you crying? is it me- don’t cry because of me-” he hugs you close, and wipes away your tears with gentle fingers.

“i’m not sad, rin,” you smile up at him, “happy tears. happy because you love me, and you don’t care if the whole world knows it-”

“even if you are a jealous-”

he pulls you in close and whispers fiercely. “damn right i’m jealous, because i got the best person in the world right beside me. and i’ll never let you go, and i’ll always love you. let the world say what they want to say, because you’re mine.”

“i love you too, rin-”

and then he pulls you into a searing kiss, embedding himself into your very soul and your entire mind is consumed with just rin itoshi. featherlight touches leave trails of heat down your face, and you breathe a soft sigh.

because rin in the mornings (and any other time) is truly just a sight to behold.

“say it,” rin murmurs and pulls away. you’re both breathing a little heavy and he looks at you with such love and emotion in his eyes that you know what he needs.

“i’m yours.”

the next kiss sends off fireworks in your heart and ignites your world in a blaze of life because you’re rin’s, he’s yours, and the two of you together are unstoppable.

there will be ups and downs. highs of unimaginable greatness and lows and worlds of hurt. but you’ll get through it.

together.

OH MY GOD MWA MWA MWA AHHHHHH

rin is truly the best lover when he's with you, i refuse to believe othwerise.... well i know he''ll prob be AWKWARD and cold at first.. (i'll totally do an arranged marriage sitch on my ao3 oh i love the idea already)

stay tuned for part two (guess which character in comments!!! or request which one im open) i'll link it under the series column when it's rdy ;)

thank u sm for reading, and thank you to @enchanthings for these lovely page dividers. grateful foreva 🫶

(rin pics bcs i love him sm, look at that penetrating stare and bro has hella eyelashes..)

ASJFDSOIF ok THANKS FOR REEADING AGAIN!!

part two is up and linked!!! happy reading :)

#blue lock #bllk #bllk x reader #bllk fluff #rin itoshi #rin itoshi x y/n #rin itoshi x reader #bllk imagines #blue lock x reader #blue lock fluff #itoshi rin

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joelsgoldrush · 10 months

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swore i heard you whisper that you preferred us like that

joel miller x f!reader / 5,8k words

summary: you ask joel –the quiet, distant joel– to teach you how to ride a horse. they say the eyes are the window to the soul, and it must be true, because when he really sees you, it´s like he finally understands what you feel for him.

warnings: smut 18+ let’s pretend joel never left jackson, porn with plot, no use of y/n, age gap (reader is in her late 20s, joel is 56), grinding, oral (f receiving), fingering, masturbation, pet names, unprotected p in v (don't try this at home ok), dirty talk, soft!dom joel (sort of???), a bit of angst/feelings, joel gets all babygirl around reader, ellie appears for like a minute, mediocre attempt at recreating joel's southern accent (sorry in advance)

a/n: hello??? well this is my first fic ever so bear with me, i'm still new to all this. also english isn't my first language so i'm afraid there may be mistakes (mostly when it comes to collocations bc i hate them and they confuse me), buuuut i'm learning obviously and if you find anything that should be corrected PLEASE TELL ME thank you :) i'd appreciate if you told whether you liked this story (idk what to call it tbh) but if you don't it's more than fine! anyways thank you so much for reading if you come across this fic, i hope you like it! i've spent a week writing it bc finals season is killing me <///3

here's my masterlist in case you want to read my other works :)

"Oh, my drunken southern star / How you tried to hide in darkness / Slipped from orbit / Now you’re dangerously close / Come out, come out from all your hiding out / We’ll dig in our heels, salute the battlefields / Where our broken hearts were born."

What is it that he has?

You used to ask yourself that question every night as you went to bed. On some occasions, you couldn't manage to come up with an exact answer. There were too many reasons that disclosed why a man like him lingered on your mind, even in those moments that were supposed to be for you and only you. Sleeping more than three hours a day was definitely something you needed tremendously, but still, the not-so-rational voice inside your head kept on bringing his name up without fail, disturbing your rest.

Joel Miller. Was it possible to feel like this? Like you knew somebody without having exchanged more than five words with them? Sure, there wasn't a single person in Jackson who wasn't aware of his existence. From whispered rumors in the streets to stories that intended to give his reserved personality an explanation, Joel became a real talking-point among those in the commune. Years ago, when the world was still just a floating ball in space, he would’ve frightened you, being the kind of person your parents used to warn you about as you started to grow older.

He walked a certain way, as if he were holding the suffering of many lives in his hands. Always on guard, prepared to fight those who defied him. Hidden knives in his pockets, a gun between his fingers, the trigger too tempting to be pulled at any time given. His hair was a mixture of brown and gray, and you swore that the latter was only becoming more prominent as days went by.

Suddenly, your pillow felt too uncomfortable, your hands fisting the fabric of your t-shirt while you kicked the blanket resting on top of your bare feet. A sigh escaped your lips, the taste of something you couldn't even distinguish on your tongue, your unsteady breath being the only sound to be heard in that noiseless night.

You were having a hard time figuring out how you felt about Joel (if there was anything to feel in the first place, since he barely remembered your face and there you were, fantasizing about him instead of sleeping.) Maybe you liked how he presented himself, how bossy and persistent he looked the times you caught him patrolling around the zone. Or perhaps it was his character what charmed you in the first place, and the fact that, deep down, a different side from him remained completely unseen.

He was handsome, too. Tall, broad shoulders, aquiline nose. His arms looked majestic in every single piece of clothing he wore, his tanned skin shiny enough to reflect the very same sun. And his legs… you were sure they were muscular like the rest of his body, because of all the physical effort he did. You had heard that he worked as a contractor before the pandemic, which made a lot of sense. Once or twice you had paid attention to his hands and–

Then, a familiar feeling sinked in. Warm began spreading through your belly, your thighs involuntary clenching together. “Fuck,” you muttered in a low tone, keeping your hands glued to your sides. Another motive not to think about Joel: he made you feel… things. Certain things that you hadn't felt for anyone in a very long time. You preferred to think that it was probably due to the fact that you were touch-starved, and not because you found yourself deeply attracted to him. Never had you ever been a sexually active person, so why now? Why did the mere image of Joel in your mind turn you on?

He’s strong. I’m alone. I feel the need to find someone who’s willing to protect me. That’s it. No other reason.

Your internal monologue was lacking in arguments, but it was definitely something you could work with. As if on cue, you found it hard to keep your eyes open, your limbs not feeling as if they were yours anymore. Next thing you knew, you were asleep.

That night, you dreamt with Joel.

★ ★ ★ ★ ★

In a small cabin, you taught children how to paint and draw. Maria believed it to be helpful for their psychological development or something like that, and you had agreed to do it. A good way to spend your free time– that’s what it was. Plus, you liked children; some would even choose to include you in their drawings, and that small gesture just warmed your heart.

There, you met Ellie, a teenager whose basic vocabulary consisted mostly of profanities.

And boy, you loved Ellie.

It was hard not to, actually. She was like a breath of fresh air, with her jokes and instant charm. You two became attached in a short time, and she reminded you of a younger version of you, just a lot braver. Although in this world it brought her benefits, you sometimes wished she wouldn’t have gone through all that shit. Those eyes, which squinted as she laughed if you tickled her sides, were the cemetery of many buried memories. You wondered how she managed to put a smile on her face despite her past and the horrible things she had seen, hoping it was genuine and not a mask.

“Look!” her voice brought you back to reality. Blinking in her direction, you realized the amount of paint you had dropped onto the floor, a red stain already forming on the carpet. “Are you okay? You seem off.”

“I’m fine! Just a bit sleepy today, that's all,” you got closer to where she was lying down, her fingers moving the brush you had gifted her in different directions. Squatting a bit, you placed a strand of hair that didn’t make it into her ponytail behind her ear. “So, what are you painting?”

She smiled warmly, and her teeth catched her lower lip momentarily. “It’s not finished, okay? Don’t freak out. I know you’re a perfectionist.”

“I’m not…” you tried to explain yourself, but ended up choosing to be defeated. “Maybe you’re right. Anyway, may I see it?”

The canvas was in your hands a few moments later. Ellie spoke beside you, her words mixing together in a sign of embarrassment. “It’s for Joel. Figured I could do something nice for him, you know? I don’t– I think I need to start over. His eyes look kind of strange, don’t they? They’re so close he looks like a cyclops.”

“Don’t say that, kiddo. This is… it’s beautiful,” your index finger traced the lines framing his jaw, the shades of his skin perfectly achieved. You held the painting even tighter, afraid of breaking it for a second. He wasn’t frowning like he normally did; Ellie had painted him smiling, and the crinkles by his eyes matched his age. Surely you must have spent more time than necessary staring at it, ‘cause then Ellie continued talking.

“Well, you know what they say: The student has become the teacher.”

You handed the canvas to her, a smirk taking place on your face. “Yeah, I guess I’ll stop teaching you if that’s the case.”

An hour or so later, someone knocked on the door. As both of your hands were occupied (a more formal way to say that they were dirty with paint), you screamed “Come in!”, and Ellie covered her painting with an old, muddy curtain you used to clean the tables in which the children worked. You were about to ask her why she had reacted in that way, until you turned around and saw him.

Joel was there, as every other Wednesday. In your cabin, standing right in front of you. And you didn’t even look presentable. His hair looked messy, a couple of locks stuck to his forehead with sweat. “Hi,” he said shortly, meeting your gaze and attempting to shake your hand, but you avoided contact.

Showing him your hands, you held your palms in the air as an indication of the still fresh paint on your skin. “Sorry. If I were to accept the gesture, I’d leave you a stain.”

He retrieved a bit, adjusting his glove. “It’s okay. Safety first.”

That was supposed to be a joke, you noticed tardily. The silence in the room persisted until Ellie appeared from behind your back, already putting her coat on.

“You were supposed to pick me up in half an hour, asshole.”

His mouth snapped shut for an instant. “I missed you too. How was the class?”

Ellie lifted her shoulder in a half shrug, looking in your direction and proceeding to jerk her thumb toward Joel. She didn’t want him to see the painting. “Fine as usual.”

“Can I see what you’re–”

“No fucking way!” she accentuated the word fucking, drawing him closer to the door.

“Why not?”

“Because it’s not done.”

“But–”

“No more questions, Joel. Let’s go! Say bye!” Ellie handled him like a baby, which made you giggle.

Though you saw Joel raising his eyebrows, so you stopped laughing.

Soon, they left and the cabin returned to its familiar quietness. A sigh erupted from your chest, and you allowed yourself to fall on top of a chair.

At least you could say you had actually talked to Joel for once.

★ ★ ★ ★ ★

It didn’t surprise you that you wanted to see him again.

Not in the “you-turn-me-on” way, but in the “you-seem-interesting-and-i-need-to-find-out-why” one.

He had something. Something so magnetic and indecipherable that kept pulling you towards him. Something that made you look for his presence in every crew, and not sensing what it was only made your wishes to dissect him grow bigger. There was a tiny probability that he was an idiot with a pretty face. Who knew? You definitely didn’t, and that needed to change. You deserved to know if pining over that man was worth it or not.

That chain of thoughts led you to look for him the next day, almost trembling with eagerness as you asked him the most stupid and unexpected question you could have imagined.

“Would you teach me how to ride a horse?”

He looked at you as if you were out of your mind, opening his mouth a few times and then closing it before he actually replied to you. “You’re tellin' me you don’t know how to ride a horse?”

“Tried it a few times, but failed and now I really want to learn to do it properly,” you swore his eyes were trying to decipher if you were saying the truth or not. “Ellie told me that you could probably make some time to teach me?”

“So Ellie's in charge of my schedule, I suppose?” you froze on the spot, and he must have noticed it because then his expression dulled. “Sorry, sweetheart. It was a joke. I've been told I'm not the best humorist.”

Sweetheart. You could’ve died a happy girl.

“Look, why don’t we meet up tomorrow after lunch? I'm sure it won’t take us much time. Not a difficult task, y’know?” he stroked his beard, apparently thinking you understood what he was talking about.

“Sure. Thank you, Joel. My name’s–“

He didn’t let you finish. “I do know your name,” and before leaving, he repeated: “I’ll be here tomorrow. You know where to find me.”

To say that you slept without interruptions that night was an understatement. Each hour seemed to become longer the more you glimpsed your watch. Your heart drummed inside your chest violently, and you feared that someone else would be able to hear it if they got close enough to you.

After having lunch in the same spot as every other mundane day, your legs took you to the stable. You took a shaky breath, expecting him to appear out of thin air, but fifteen minutes went by, and there was still no sign of Joel. Pressing your forehead against the wooden door, you wrapped your arms around yourself. “What was I even thinking?”

“Hey.”

You looked to your side and– there he was, already getting inside the stable and inviting you to follow him. Joel petted one of the horses, clicking his tongue. His fingers caressed the animal’s back, and when he shot a glance at you, he didn’t ignore your disturbed expression.

“Don’t tell me you’re afraid of horses.”

“I’m not afraid of them,” you laughed awkwardly, eyeing the horse, which stared at you with those big and strange eyes. You raised your hand to mimic Joel, but that just made the animal move further away from you. “I guess it’s mutual. We don’t like each other.”

Joel smirked, guiding you outside. “It’s a damn horse. I don’t think you can tell whether he likes you or not. You gotta change that attitude of yours,” he murmured as he got on top of the horse, pinching the bridge of his nose. “Treat him well and he’ll be nice.”

At first, Joel taught you the basics: how to position yourself for balance, get your legs in the right position, hold the reins properly. A little bit of help coming from him was needed for you to mount the horse. He got down on one knee, patting it as if it were a mounting block. “Come on. Step on it.”

No need to ask me twice, you thought as you did what you were told, and once you were grabbing on those reins for dear life, you observed him with curious eyes. “Now what?”

“Now…” he pressed his hand into one of the horse’s sides, and afterwards, the horse began to fucking trot and you cried out, a high-pitched shriek slipping from your mouth. Joel laughed maliciously, almost hypnotized by the scene. “Now is when you learn how to ride a horse!”

“This isn't funny!” you screamed, the horse still very much entertained with the way you were jerking on top of him. “Stop!”

You couldn't believe how he kept… cracking up. Joel touched his stomach, shaking with laughter. “You’re a natural, can’t you see it? I’m havin' the time of my life here.”

“What I can see is that you’re an idiot! Cut the cackle and help me!”

But he didn’t move a single muscle. Instead, he remained still, that smug look never abandoning his features.

The bastard. “You’re gonna make me beg? In this situation?”

Crossing his arms while teasingly grinning at you, he added: “Wouldn’t hurt to try.”

“Joel Miller, will you help me? Pretty please?” your hair was getting in the way, and you could taste it as you insisted. “Is that enough for you?”

It was, actually. He helped you get down from the horse, his thick fingers digging into the mushy skin of your waist. It shouldn’t have felt that good, but it did. You were supposed to be angry at him for setting you up and still, by touching you for a microsecond, he had transformed you into something malleable.

Sadly, that feeling didn’t last much longer. “Didn’t know you were a man of manners. Should’ve told me beforehand.”

“Didn't know you could scream like that. I hope you didn’t freak anyone out.”

The two of you continued to practice until nightfall. A thing you also learned, apart from horse riding, was that Joel was a determined man. Everytime you tried to quit, he stopped you, making it impossible for you to rest. You stared at him, rubbing the back of your sore neck with a grimace. “I’m tired. Can we go back?”

“One more time.”

“Joel–”

“Trot a couple of meters just one more time, and that’s it for today. Can you do that for me?”

You tried not to pay too much attention to his choice of words, although it was basically non-viable. He looked sinful, and you longed to shut him up with a bruising kiss. Again, a hopeless option. Your hands itched to touch him, to feel his stubble, rough and coarse under your thumbs. How could you stay focused when the man you had been daydreaming with for the last couple of months was bossing you around?

Despite your inability to clear your head of any of those thoughts, you managed to accomplish what he had asked you to do. “Well done,” he offered you his hand to dismount the horse and you accepted it, sighing as you stretched out your arms. “We should take him back to the stable,” Joel suggested, giving you the impression of being pleased as you told him you were coming with him.

Inside the stable, he relocated the horse into one of the many stalls. Unbelievably, the place didn’t smell like absolute shit, which was what you were expecting from a barn. “Thank you for the lesson,” you told Joel once he was done with the horse.

“Anytime,” he scratched his jaw, the dim light making his dark eyes look, if possible, even darker. “It wasn’t that bad, was it?”

“No. You were right,” your heart thrummed with every word that he blurted. His presence was addictive. You were never the one to have any bad habits, but deep down, you recognized that he easily could develop one. “I thought you were less talkative.”

“So did I,” for an instant, he pressed his lips together, forming a tight line, as if he had said something he shouldn’t have in the first place. “I think I didn’t ask you this before: but why now? I mean, why did you wait so much time to learn how to ride a horse? Everyone in Jackson seems to know how.”

You cleared your throat, his piercing eyes peering at your movements. “I guess I thought it wasn't necessary back then, before all this. It's one of those things that you don't even consider until it becomes inevitable. I used to believe I had a lot of time left when I was younger,” you had never talked about this with anyone else. There was something so intimate about this conversation, how Joel stood seemingly tongue-tied in front of you, as if he were taking notes of what you were confessing to him. “I remember being a kid and not wanting to use my toys sometimes because I kept waiting for the right moment. But then…”

“You realize there’s no such thing as the right moment,” he finished the sentence for you, and you bowed your head. “Life can end at any moment, especially in a world like ours. That’s why you always gotta do what you wish to. We never know what’ll happen tomorrow.”

“Live for today, hope for tomorrow? That’s your creed?” you tried to mock him, the tension in the stable far from evident, but he didn’t move.

“It’s the way I try to live my own life. I don’t like being left with the desire to do somethin’ I could’ve done earlier. Too old for that.”

Maybe you were gradually losing it. Perhaps just a little. It couldn’t be a coincidence, right? Had he noticed how you acted around him? Were you that obvious?

“So, you would advise me to just…”

“Do whatever you feel right, sweetheart.”

That raspy sweetheart made you give in.

His eyes. His penetrating, gleaming eyes scrutinized your face at the same time you closed the distance between your bodies. From there, you were able to see every freckle, every small detail that you hadn’t previously acknowledged. He parted his lips, as if to speak, but no words other than your name came out. One of your hands made its way up to his cheek, cupping it, feeling the warmth his skin radiated. His head immediately leaned into your touch, like a moth into a flame.

You kissed him, unable to keep waiting. It took him what felt like ages to kiss you back, his fingers tangling in your hair. He absorbed your whimpers, pressing your back against the nearest wall. Maddening– it was the perfect word to describe how being kissed by Joel felt like. When you thought he was going to draw away from you, he just held you tighter until your lungs implored for some air. Your knees had never felt this weak, and you found yourself grabbing onto his shoulders, already feeling the places where his stubble had left its trace in flames.

“Joel…” you mumbled against his lips, detaching your mouth from his. Your erratic breaths seemed to sync together like a melody, and you tugged at the collar of his jacket.

He knew, could see it on your features. “Wanna go to yours?”

Joel took you home. The moment you set foot in the cabin, he closed the door behind him, his hand lingering on the handle as he contemplated you from a distance. You took your coat off first, starting to unzip your pants. There was silence long enough to hear crickets in, the moon up in the sky being the only bystander of your meeting. His eyes roamed the newly exposed skin of your legs and you observed him gulp.

“Did something happen?” you asked him, a flush crepting up your face. Taking a step forward, one of his hands came to rest on top of yours.

“No, it’s just that– Are you sure you want this?”

Crinkling your nose, you uttered: “Why wouldn’t I?”

“I’m just too old for you,” he warned you, running a knuckle down your cheek. “You should be with guys your age, y’know? Not with an old man like me.”

“I want you,” reassuring him, you got rid of your t-shirt, and the fact he was still dressed up from neck to toes lit some kind of fire inside you. His calloused fingers fiddled with the strap of your bra until it slipped off your shoulder. “This is what I want. Please, Joel.”

It turned out that Joel Miller certainly was a man of manners.

You couldn't help but moan as he grabbed you by the waist, dragging you to the couch by the window and straddling his lap, his hard-on finding its place beneath you, pulsing and in need of more. His tongue brushed yours ever so often, and your eyes rolled to the back of your head as his teeth latched onto the skin of your throat. Joel groaned, the sound, low and primal, having its desired effect on you, your hips involuntarily grinding against his in a delicious but tormenting rhythm that already had you on the verge of tears.

“Joel, please,” you managed to plead, not knowing precisely what you were asking for. His hands cupped your ass, imprinting his fingerprints on the soft flesh, forcing your hips to go harder and harder. The harsh fabric of his pants was definitely going to leave a mark on your cheeks, and thinking that helped you realize that you were the only one –almost– naked. You reached for the buttons of his denim shirt, your lips hovering over his. “Take your clothes off?”

He did the rest himself, throwing his jacket to the floor. When he got to his jeans, he cocked his head. “Why don’t we move this to the bedroom, if you’re so goddamn needy?” The few guys you had been with had never been very talkative during sex; there was even this one specific boy who had asked you to not make a sound while he fucked you.

But Joel wasn’t like them. It was just starting and you had already realized that he had a dirty mouth, an expectant look on his face every time he waited for your reaction to his words. “Now you’re quiet, huh? Thought you wanted me to fuck you, darlin',” one of his fingers pressed down on your clit, stimulating it through your underwear. He sighed, stopping his movements and pressing the damp pad of it against your lower lip, urging you to taste yourself. “You’re wet, baby. So fuckin’ wet. Have you been like this all day? Bet you would’ve let me take you right there in the forest.”

“Oh my God,” you whined next to his ear, your whole body trembling with desire. “Take me to bed,” you begged him, and next thing you knew, he was grabbing you as if you weighed nothing and heading towards your room.

Not knowing how, you kept your hands to yourself until he placed you on top of the bed. Joel shoved his jeans down and you didn’t think twice– you stroked his length, the fabric of his boxers only making the slow drag of your hand more satisfying. His long fingers circled your throat, and you moaned as you kept eliciting exquisite noises from him. “Let me take care of you,” his dilated pupils carved holes in your being, his grip doing nothing to cease the ache between your legs. “Please, baby. I need to make you feel good. Been thinkin’ about this for so long.”

“What?” you slowed down your pace, looking up at him through your eyelashes. “You wanted me?”

“Why do you think I began to pick Ellie up from your classes, huh? Because I’m a good, generous man?” Joel parted your knees, getting closer to where you required him the most. “I’m sorry to ruin this, but I’m far from good. Just wanted to see you and your pretty face. Didn’t know if we were on the same page until you came lookin' for me, askin' me to teach you how to ride a damn horse,” you hadn’t noticed your bra was missing till he cupped one of your breasts, flicking your nipple between his fingers. “I’m sure there were many other people you could’ve asked to teach you, but you chose me, didn’t you?”

“Don’t want anybody else,” your lips chased his, a drop of sweat already rolling down your temple. “I didn’t– didn’t know you noticed me.”

“How could I not? If you could only look at yourself like I’m doing right now… You’re a sight, sweetheart, all spread out for me,” removing your panties, he kissed the skin where your inner thighs met, his tongue darting out to draw imaginary figures on your flesh. His mouth was just inches away from your cunt, and you had to tell him.

“Joel?”

“What’s wrong?”

“I’ve never– nobody has ever done that for me.”

He seemed to understand what you were referring to. It made you tense a bit, despite the fact that you were completely naked in front of him, basically begging him to tear you apart. Still, the realization that you weren't as expert as him hit you out of nowhere. Yeah, it was all fun and games, kissing and touching probably the hottest man you had seen in your almost three decades of life. But said man was a lot older than you, and he had lived his best years in the real world, not this fucked up version you grew up in. You were sure he had been with many different women, which wasn’t a problem– you two were nothing.

“Nobody has ever tasted ya’? That’s what you’re tryin’ to tell me?” you nodded quickly, shoving a strand of his graying hair back away from his eyes. Joel chuckled languidly, squeezing your hips. “Do you want me to? It’s okay if you don’t. We can try somethin’ else.”

“Please,” you’d have time to embarrass yourself later, thinking about the amount of times you had repeated that word. But certain moments were to be lived only once, and though you hoped it wasn't the case, you had to take the chance. “I want you to.”

Four words. It took Joel four words to disappear between your legs, licking a hot stripe up your folds. You nibbled on your bottom lip, a loud moan filling the void of your dorm. He drew sweet patterns in your cunt, discovering a part of you that no one else ever had, and you couldn’t help but to grind against his face as he dipped the tip of his tongue into your entrance. Breathing wasn’t a necessity anymore. You felt as if all the air in the world was being punched out of your lungs, the knot in your belly growing tighter the more Joel spent his precious time keeping you entertained.

At some point, he focused his attention on your clit, circling it over and over again, making you shudder. Suddenly, the pad of his middle finger tested the waters, and he slowly slid it into your cunt, earning a strangled whine from you. Burying your hands in his hair, your glossy eyes looked for him for a second. You shouldn’t have done that, because as you took in the sight of Joel with his own eyes closed, browns knitted, your nostrils flared, and you wondered if it was even possible to want somebody that much.

“Joel, wait, I’m– fuck,” your jaw went slack and you scrunched up your face, two of his thick fingers nudging that spot that made you see stars. “I’m close.”

“That’s a good thing, sweetheart. Don’t know why you say it in such a dry tone,” his mouth curved into a smile, his chin and stubble shining with your slick.

Your chest rose and fell with rapid breaths. “I don’t want to come yet.”

“But you will.”

A thing you also learned, apart from horse riding, was that Joel was a determined man.

“Joel–“

“I’ll make you come with my mouth, and then with my cock,” dizziness was starting to blur your vision, your eyelashes fluttering with every hard thrust of his fingers. You glanced up to the ceiling, tears filling your eyes. “Think you can do that for me, be my good girl and come twice?”

You bobbed your head. It was official: he was going to make you come.

Drawing in a long breath, you could feel the unbearable pressure in your core. His name sounded like a prayer on your lips, chanting it in the same way some people expressed their devotion to a certain God. You had your own personal deity, whose tongue accomplished to push you to the limit, licking every drop of your release as if it were a special kind of forbidden elixir.

Your shoulders sagged and you relaxed under him. Joel kissed you, an open mouthed and filthy kiss crowning that moment as you panted. Through the cotton fabric of his boxers, you felt his hard-on poking your thigh. Shoving his underwear down, you took him in your hand, hot and just big, stroking him for real this time. You twisted your wrist at the tip, and he slumped forward, almost crushing you with his entire body weight, his breath dampening your neck. “Wanna fuck you, baby,” he croaked, his hips chasing your touch.

Out of all the scenarios you had ever imagined, none of them included being split open by Joel. You had a very vivid imagination, but no amount of creativity would’ve prepared you for what his cock would feel like inside of you. He bottomed out, his arms shaking where they rested on each side of your head. Joel’s breath quickened as he pulled out, just letting the tip, and then thrusting into you again.

“Fuck,” you didn’t recognize your own voice. It was even hard to decipher if you were still alive or dead from how magnificent he felt.

“So good, sweetheart. You’re so good, such a good girl,” he groaned, fucking deeper into you. His cock pulsed inside you, your cunt squeezing him. “Can’t believe how– how tight you are. You’re gonna make me lose my f–fucking mind.”

It was just too much. You hadn’t even recovered from your last orgasm before Joel started pounding into you like his life depended on it, the obscene sound of skin slapping skin ringing out in the room.

“You gonna come, huh? Gonna make a mess?” you could sense he was also close, his pace faltering as seconds went by, words slurring together. He pressed his forehead against yours, clenching his fists and taking in a sharp breath. “Fuck. I’m not gonna last much longer, baby.”

Come inside, you wished to tell him, to feel his seed dripping out of your greedy hole, painting your walls. But you weren't on the pill; it was also the first time you were sleeping with Joel, and you didn’t know how he would take the… suggestion. “Close,” you yelped instead, tears shimmering in your eyes as Joel’s body hovered over you like the most perfect eclipse.

His thrusts became more frenzied, if possible. “That’s it, darlin’. Come for me,” your gaze fixated upon him, his eyes flickering with hunger. “Wanna see you when you soak my cock.”

Your body went limp, your orgasm hitting you like a truck. Soreness took place in your throat as you moaned his name through the aftershocks, fireworks exploding behind your eyelids. Going rigid, you let go of Joel’s shoulders. He pulled out, mumbling something you didn’t quite catch. You fisted his cock, trying to give him the release he so yearned for. Joel kissed you, messy teeth and saliva taking part of it. Heavy on your hand, his dick twitched as you squeezed the base, roped of his warm cum splattering your belly. The scene reminded you of a painting; he was the talented painter, and you his blank canvas, waiting to be signed with his name.

It was the turn of silence now. None of you said anything for a while, until Joel used his boxers to clean up his cum from your stomach, smiling apologetically at you. “Sorry.”

“It’s okay,” your fingers delicately traced the contours of his chest as he reclined, enveloping you in the embrace of his strong arms. “Will you stay?”

Please say yes.

“Only if you want me to.”

Moral of the story: learning how to ride a horse can actually be nice if your teacher happens to be Joel Miller.

3K notes · View notes

straykeedz · 7 months

Text

day 4: hyunjin + cumshot

©straykeedz

tw: exboyfriend!hyunjin; mentions of a breakup; porn with plot but more like plot with porn tbh; very brief nipple play; unprotected piv sex (don't do that at home 🤨); brief clit play; hyunjin cums on reader (obviously) and takes a pic; cum swallowing; exes2lovers?; ♡

honestly this is, like, 90% plot and 10% porn lol, also bare with me if it sucks - english is not englishing these days 🥹 plus i really don’t know what this is lol hyunjin is always the hardest for me to write 🫠

wc: 4,2k (i’m sorry 🫣);

this is part of my kinktober masterlist. you can find my regular masterlist here (tho it will not be updated until the end of kinktober) ♡

🔖 (open): @linos-kitten ; @luneskies ; @kxcies-blog ; @idunnomanmynamewastaken ; @cessixja ; @stolasisyourparent ; @kookiesbunny ; @xoxo-xoxo-bunny ; @ivyskzsworld ; @mal-lunar-28 ; @leetaste ; @sunnykynnie ; @channiesgoodgirl ; @seonghwatoothless ; @mrsminho ; @seungminluv3 ; @jin-from-the-block ; @aaasia111 ; @sulkygyu ; @whosanaanyway ; @y-ur--I ; @vixensss ; @nightimescapes ; @freckleboilix ; @dreamingaboutjisung ; @yourbeomiebear ; ♡

to make sure i add you to the taglist, your age must be clearly visible on your profile. also, empty blogs will not be added - add at least a profile picture to your blog so that i’ll know you’re not a bot. ♡

smut below the cut, minors dni.

♠︎

You scoff, throwing your phone on the bed - still no sign of Hyunjin. He was supposed to be at your place half an hour ago, and still hasn’t showed up. Typical of him - not keeping his promises, no wonder the two of you didn’t work out, it would a miracle if you did. But tonight you don’t have it in you to put up with him - you have somewhere to be and you’re gonna be late if he doesn’t ring your doorbell within the next ten minutes.

Speak of the devil - the doorbell rings. Thank God, you think, rolling your eyes as you head for the door. Once you swing the door open, you’re met with your ex standing on your doorstep - looking pretty handsome, you have to admit. He’s wearing an oversized t-shirt and has his hair styled into a messy bun, undercut clearly visible.

“You were supposed to be here half an hour ago.”, you remark, an unamused expression on your face.

“I’m sorry.” Hyunjin sighs, adjusting his glasses. “Something came up at work.”

You scoff. Yeah, of course, work. You’re not surprised, everything’s about his stupid job with him. You’re surprised he still hasn’t moved into his office, considering he spends most of his time there anyways. But it’s not your place to judge, not anymore, because you’re not his girlfriend anymore and it shouldn’t bother you.

“Yeah, well…”, you cut him off, checking the hour on the digital watch wrapped around your wrist. “You have less than half an hour to grab your things.”, you tell him.

He looks at you surprised. Do you have plans? Well, that would explain why you’re all dressed up and have a full face on. Hyunjin takes a moment to look at you. You’re wearing a black tank top and a skirt - too short for his liking, but it’s not his place to say anything: he’s not your boyfriend anymore, and you can dress however you want to. Just… where are you going?, he can’t help but wonder, and secretly hopes it’s girls’ night or something like that.

“Right.”, he mutters. “Where…?”, he trails, hoping you’d get the rest.

When Hyunjin moved out of your shared apartment a month ago, he didn’t bring all of his things with him, and left most of his clothes in your closet, especially his sweatshirts and jumpers. Given that you broke up in mid-summer, it’s not like he really needed them anyways - but now that fall is approaching, he’s forced to face the problem. Still, he can’t bring himself to ask you if his stuff is still in your closet or if you already moved all of his things - it’d only make the breakup more official than it already is, more real.

“Oh.”, you clear your throat. “They’re still there - in the closet.”

He follows you in what once was both his and your bedroom, which looks so different now. His paintings aren’t exposed on the walls anymore, and there’s no trace of your framed pictures. It pains him, but he tries his best not to let is show, reminding himself that it was for the best. He selects a few of his favorite pieces of clothing, informing you that he’ll probably have to stop by in a few days to take all of his stuff.

“Where’s…”, he starts, rummaging through the hooked sweatshirts, looking for that specific one. “…that grey one with the green details?”, he asks you.

You’re taken aback by his question, because you know exactly what sweatshirt he’s looking for, and you know exactly where it is. You make your way to the closet, to your side of the closet, and slide the door open.

“Here.”, you hand it to him, not able to look him in the eyes. He’s just as surprised as he takes it from your hands, then it hits him - it’s your favorite sweatshirt of his, the one you always stole from him and used to wear to feel him close to you.

“You… still wear it?”, he can’t stop himself from asking you, knowing he’s sounding ridiculous right now. Call it a wishful thinking if you will - that you still wear his clothes.

“I-“, you could lie, but he’d see it in your eyes anyways. “I only wore it a couple of times.”, you admit.

One time, because it was particularly chilly after a thunderstorm, and the other… because you wanted to feel him close, smell his scent and pretend he was still there with you, that you hadn’t broken up and that he’d be coming home and cuddle next to you. But of course he didn’t. Yours, too, a wishful thinking.

“Oh.”, is all he manages to get out - he can’t ignore the way his heart is beating fast in his chest as he holds the sweatshirt with shaky hands. Maybe there’s still hope, maybe he’s still got a chance to make things right.

Before he could say anything else, your phone beeps - a message. You’re quick to retrieve your phone from the back pocket of your skirt and open a notification: a voice memo from your date. You’re about to respond that you can’t listen to it right now, when your fingers slip on the screen and you mistakenly let it play. Full volume, of course, because life’s a bitch.

“Hey, y/n. I’ll pick you up for our date a bit later if it’s alright with you. I just got out of work and I need a sho-“, you lock your phone and throw it on the bed, heart hammering in your chest.

Hyunjin is looking at you with lost eyes - it’s nothing compared to how he’s feeling inside his chest. Void, numb, broken. It’s as if his soul just left his body. You’re dating? Like, going out, meeting boys and… perhaps kiss them, bring them to your house? He feels his knees buckling a bit.

“You’re… you’re going on a date?”, he asks, eyebrows furrowed. Maybe he misheard the voice memo, maybe it was not a man’s voice and it was one of your girlfriends, maybe maybe maybe.

“Hyunjin…”, you to swallow the lump in your throat, not sure what you’re supposed to say right now, there’s not a proper way to talk about your dating life to your ex, is there?

“You’re dating again? Already?”, anger and hurt replaced the confusion in his tone as he stands there, in the middle of your bedroom, sweatshirt in his hands as he looks at you like you just ripped his heart out of his chest.

“It’s not serious.”, you say quickly, not wanting him to think you’re going to marry this guy or anything.

“I should hope so, it would be a fucking travesty if it was serious. We broke up a month ago.”, he remarks. “Are you already over me? Am I that easy to move on from?”, he lets out a sarcastic chuckle, jaw clenched as he snaps his head in the opposite direction, not wanting to look at you right now - not when his eyes are fucking watery.

“It’s not like that.”, the lump in your throat is back.

“And how is it like then?”, he snaps.

You can’t believe him - you honestly can’t believe him. He was the one who broke up with you and he has the audacity to try to make you feel guilty for trying to move on? Okay, maybe jumping into dating guys isn’t the best way of coping with a breakup, but he doesn’t get a say in this.

“Are you being serious right now?”, now it’s your turn to snap. “What am I supposed to do, Hyunjin? Sulk and never move on?”, you speak harshly.

Your words sting him - because that’s exactly what he’s been doing for the past weeks, and he can’t believe you’re already talking about moving on when he still hasn’t gotten used to sleeping alone. He still hasn’t gotten used to a life without you - to waking up alone, to have breakfast alone, to watch movies alone on the couch, to the cold bed that welcomes him each night. And you’re just… dating, casually.

“Were you already seeing him?”, he hates how his voice trembles as he speaks, and clears his throat immediately after. He doesn’t want to embarrass himself in front of you more than he already has.

“What?”, your voice comes out in a whisper and your eyes widen.

“You heard me.”, he tightens his grip on the sweater. “Were you already seeing him when we were together?”, he clarifies.

“How could you even think I’d do something like that to you?”, you ask him, sincerely shocked.

“It’d explain why you moved on so quickly.”

“Of course I wasn’t seeing him when we were together, Hyunjin, what the fuck?”, you raise your voice. “Besides, why do you care? You broke up with me, not the other way around!”

Hyunjin is forced to face the hard truth and the fact that his actions had had consequences and an impact on your life. He hadn’t even given you a proper explanation when he broke up with you, what a coward he’d been… Too caught up in his own feelings, he didn’t even stop once to wonder how you were doing, how you were dealing with the breakup and his absence. Was it that bad it pushed you into other men’s arms? Was this the first man you’d decided to go out with? Have there been others? He’s not sure he wants to know.

He snaps his head in your direction as soon as he hears your words. You’ve got it completely wrong if you think he broke up with you because he doesn’t care about you when, in fact, it’s the opposite. He cares too much.

“I broke up with you because I wanted to protect you, not because I didn’t love you anymore.”, he mutters.

“Oh, please.”, you scoff. “That’s the lamest excuse ever, even worse than the cliché ‘It’s not you, it’s me’.”

“But it’s true!”, he snaps. “It’s true. I did it for you. Do you really think I didn’t notice the way you were no longer happy with me? I was bad for you, y/n. I felt like I was… clipping your wings, like I was taking happiness away from you.”

You’re honestly shocked by his sudden outburst and confession, but it doesn’t make you feel better. In fact, it makes you even more upset and angry at him.

“It wasn’t your choice to make.”, you reply coldly, crossing your arms over your chest. “You broke me, Hyunjin. You breaking up with me - it hurt more than every fight, more than every disappointment.”, your voice is shaky and your eyes are welling up with tears. Hyunjin hates himself for that.

“If you love someone you let them go.” Hyunjin quotes, hoping it’d make you understand the logic he followed when he did what he did. His dark eyes staring into yours.

“For if they return, they were always yours.”, you whisper back. You don’t break the eye contact.

It happens in an instant.

Hyunjin drops the sweater in his hands, letting it fall on the floor of your bedroom, as his cups your face in his hands and crashes his lips onto yours - and you do the same, wrapping your fingers around his wrists, melting into the kiss. His tongue brushes your lower lip and you instantly part your lips, allowing it inside your mouth.

You can feel him growing harder in his pants, lower half of his body pressing against your stomach, and you moan at the contact when you feel it. Your hands begin to wander all over his body - first on his muscular forearms, then his biceps, then his broad shoulders. Then all the way down his chest and then on his back, scratching it over the t-shirt he’s wearing, but it makes him moan nonetheless.

At the same time, one of his hands travels down your spine until it reaches your ass - squeezing it lightly. The skirt you’re wearing is so tight his fingers are almost brushing your bare skin, and it’s driving him crazy. Moreover, he still can’t believe he’s really kissing you right now, that you have your hands on him, that he’s touching you - his brain can’t process it. He’s scared to pull away from the kiss, even if he does need to breathe, he’s scared you’ll come to your senses and realize you made a mistake, that he’s too late, that you don’t want him anymore, that’s it’s over.

But then he feels you tugging at his shirt, lifting it up a bit to expose some of his pale skin, and he takes it as a sign you want to continue. He pulls away from your lips only to regain his breath, and as he does so, his big, brown eyes stare deep into yours. You’re looking at him, too, with your beautiful eyes and puffy cheeks now pink, lips swollen from the kiss.

“Hyunjin.”, you whisper on his lips. He’s mentally preparing himself for a rejection when you tell him “Bed.” He nods eagerly, before crashing his lips onto yours once again with the same passion as before - only a little more relieved this time, knowing that you want him too just as much as he wants you.

Once you let yourself fall on the mattress, Hyunjin’s body is immediately on yours, hovering over yours as he keeps on kissing you without any intention of pulling away from you. Your skirt has lifted up a bit, allowing his crotch to press directly against yours - the bulge in his pant clearly evident as it brushes against your clothed cunt, which has you squirming under him.

He only pulls away from your body when your hands begin to wander under his t-shirt, caressing the skin of his back - taking it as a sign to take it off for good. He gets rid of his ridiculously expensive glasses as well, carefully placing them on your - well, what was once his - nightstand, before his fingers grasp the hem of his shirt. He pulls it over his head and lets it fall on the floor. You take your tank top as well, staining it a bit with your makeup on the collar, then let it fall on the floor as well - ironically enough, it ends up landing next to his.

You’re not wearing a bra, Hyunjin can’t help but notice, and wonders whether you did it on purpose - if you intended not to wear one when you were about to go out with another guy. He shakes that thought off his head, tho, not wanting it to upset him or ruin the mood, because it’s not that important right now. Not when you’re under him, naked chest on full display for him to see, skirt hiked up your waist.

He kneels between your parted legs, one hand finds its way to your hip, squeezing it lightly as he brushes your hard nipples with the knuckles of his other hand, not touching you properly. Of course he doesn’t, he’s Hyunjin, he’s a tease - you know it well. Meanwhile, your panties are completely drenched.

“Is this new?” Hyunjin asks, referring to your skirt. You nod, it is new. You bought it especially for tonight’s date, but you don’t tell him that. Hyunjin doesn’t need you to, tho, because he senses it in the way you lower your gaze and bite your lower lip. For some reason, it doesn’t upset him. “Can I fuck you in this pretty skirt, love?”, his hand travels all the way to the hem of your skirt, then to your inner thigh until his knuckles are now brushing the soft cotton of your underwear.

You whimper, and squirm under his touch. “Please.”

Hyunjin grins at your eagerness, tho he’s pleased with your answer, then asks you. “Please what?”

You hate that you love it when he teases you like that.

“Please fuck me, Hyunjin.”, you whisper, looking him in the eyes.

He tries to mask the way his breath hitches in his throat - the sight of you sprawled on your bed, legs spread to welcome him in between them while you’re lying there in nothing but a short skirt and a black thong with your tits out has him whipped. It always has.

His shaky hands reach the zipper of his pants faster than lightning, and that has a mischievous grin appear on your face. Hyunjin gets off the bed only to remove his tight skinny jeans, and you take it as an opportunity to hike your skirt further up your body. When Hyunjin sees you’re about to take your panties off, he grabs you by the wrist.

“Don’t. Leave them on.”, he practically begs. You nod. The idea of him fucking you with your skirt and underwear still on turns you on even more, you can’t deny it.

In a matter of seconds, Hyunjin is back between your legs, completely naked - fully erect cock looking gorgeous as ever. Hyunjin has an incredibly pretty cock, if you think about it. Not that you’ve seen that many, not in real life at least, but it is indeed pretty. It’s slightly less thick than average, albeit a bit longer and slightly curved so that it’s able to reach all the perfect spots inside of you. And, last but definitely not least, he knows how to use it.

“You’re staring.” Hyunjin chuckles, noticing your gaze on his hard length - not that it bothers him.

“I missed it.”, you shamelessly confess - it’s not the place nor the time to feel shy about it. Plus, it’s not some stranger you’re in front of, it’s Hyunjin, the boy you’ve dated for nearly four years. “And you know you have a nice dick.”, you quirk and eyebrow at him.

“Mh, you’re right.”, he smirks cockily. “Should I give it to you, then, since you seem to be liking it so much?”, he teases. God, you might actually cry if he doesn’t stick his cock in you within the next minute.

“Hyunjin.”

“Fine, okay.”, he chuckles, positioning himself closer to your body, propping himself up on his elbow. “Forgot how impatient you can get.”, he playfully shakes his head, the smirk not leaving his face.

You’d get impatient too if you knew how good your cock feels, you think to yourself. You don’t want to stroke his ego by saying it out loud.

He pulls your panties to the side, exposing your bare pussy to his eyes and he sucks in a breath at the sight, running the pad of his thumb up and down your slit to spread your arousal all over you - a bit surprised to find you this wet already. God knows you’ve been wet ever since you opened the door and witnessed him standing there - glasses and messy bun and everything.

“You think you need me to stretch you out?”, his voice is soft.

You shake your head as a no. “I’m good.”, you whisper, and he nods.

Seconds later, you feel the tip of his cock pocking at your wet entrance, ready to part your folds. When he does push inside, there’s nothing you can do to prevent a chocked moan from escaping your throat, not used to the stretch - despite it being very familiar. He senses the slight discomfort and immediately brings two fingers to your clit to rub it gently, knowing well it usually helps you to relax. Then, when he feels you’ve adjusted to him being inside of you, he begins to thrust.

Hyunjin fucks hard and fast.

It’s something you discovered in the early stages of your relationship, and needless to say - it shocked you. He always looks so peaceful and calm, and for some reason you thought that he’d be pretty vanilla in bed. He’s not. Sure, he can do vanilla if you ask him to, but his tendency is to fuck you hard and fast to the point you can barely stand on two feet once he’s finished with you.

This time, tho, he’s not being particularly rough. Sure, he has one hand attached to your hip, gripping it to keep you in place as he gives it to you hard, but his pace is excruciatingly slow. He takes his time, filling you up to the brim and then pulling almost all the way out so that only his tip stays inside of you, before slamming back in, making you gulp each time and roll your eyes to the back of your skull.

However, his movements come to an abrupt halt when he hears the low beep of your phone that’s right beside you. He just knows it’s that fucker of your date, who else could it be? He gives in to his impulsive thought of throwing your phone across the room - only a bit gentler than what he had in mind, letting it fall on the floor with a loud thud. “Fucker.”, he mutters under his breath, before slamming his cock back into you with a deep, hoarse grunt.

You don’t say anything - you just pray to God he didn’t crack your phone screen.

“Hyunjin.”, you moan loudly after he starts to pick up his pace, thrusting a little bit faster.

Judging by the way you just moaned his name - he can tell you’re getting closer and closer to reaching your orgasm, and for some reason, it just boosts his ego, knowing he’s the one who’s pleasuring you, the one who’s about to make you cum on his cock.

“Mhh, you’re close?”, he bites his lower lip, looking you in the eyes - you look completely fucked out, split by his cock.

“So- so close.”, you whimper, wrapping your fingers around his wrist. “Do-don’t stop.”, you beg him, spreading your legs even more to feel him closer.

Hyunjin’s cock twitches inside of you - he’s close too. “Why would I make you cum?”, he smirks at you.

Your eyes widen in fear that he won’t let you cum, that he’ll just leave you high and dry, sprawled on your bed. “Because… because I’ve been a good girl?”, you try.

Hyunjin loves to call you his good girl in bed, so you hope this might actually corrupt him and convince him to let you cum around his cock. Instead, he chuckles. “A good girl?” Another deep thrust inside of you has you seeing stars.

“Yes. I’ve been a good girl to you, please let me cum.”, you whine.

“Oh.”, he licks his lower lip, then smirks at you. “But good girls don’t let their ex fuck them in their cute little skirt and panties.”, he teases.

“They do when he’s the love of their life.”, you snap.

His eyes widen - he looks sincerely shocked by your words. Something inside of him snaps, and he begins to fuck you harder, slamming his cock inside of you repeatedly. Yeah, you definitely earned your orgasm. He feels you creaming around his cock, whitish release coating the base of his length as you come with a loud whimper, looking him in the eyes. That nearly makes him cum as well.

“Fuck- you wanna be a good girl?”, he grunts, fucking you even faster to the point your ass cheeks nearly burn due to the friction caused by the sheets underneath you. “You wanna be good to me?”, he pants.

You nod impatiently. “Yes.”

“You’re gonna let me do whatever I want to you?”

“Yes- whatever, yes.”, you pant. “You can do whatever you want.”

It happens in a matter of seconds - he pulls out of you and begins to pump his cock with his fist as his body hovers over yours, he’s practically kneeling at the height of your stomach.

“Tongue out.”, he pants, and you obey immediately, sticking out your tongue.

Hyunjin comes all over your face - hot spurts of his sperm landing on your cheeks, your forehead, your lips and your chin, to the point your whole face is covered in his cum basically.

“Wait.”, he tells you, getting off the bed immediately only to climb back on it a few seconds later, with your phone in his hand. He’s pleased with discovering you haven’t changed your passcode. Then, with your own phone practically shoved in your face, he brings two fingers to your face, coating them in his semen before shoving them into your mouth.

“Mine.”, he grunts, his cock nearly getting hard again when you moan around his fingers, licking them clean. Then, he pulls them out of your mouth and immediately retrieves his t-shirt from the floor and hands it to you, signaling for you to use it to clean his cum off your face.

As you’re cleaning yourself off, you hear him speak.

“Yeah, I guess she won’t be going out with you tonight. Sorry dude.”, you find him with his finger pressed on the screen of your phone, apparently recording a voice note.

“What are you…”

Before you could even finish the sentence, he turns the screen to your direction, allowing you to see the chat with who was supposed to pick you up in about… now. There’s a picture of you with Hyunjin’s cum all over you and his fingers in your mouth, and then there’s the voice note Hyunjin recorded mere seconds ago. However, you can’t find it in yourself to get mad at him, and crack a smile.

“You’re lucky I love you.”, you pull him close for a kiss.

“The luckiest.”

♠︎

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-> don't forget to reblog to support me if you enjoyed reading my works and to let me know your thoughts, i love reading your feedbacks! ♡

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angelltheninth · 1 year

Note

How would the BLLK boys act in a lingerie shop with their girlfriend?

This is such a fun scenario, it was really funny to write it out cause I think a lot of them would just be a mess.

Pairing: Yoichi Isagi, Bachira Meguru, Sae Itoshi, Rin Itoshi, Hyoma Chigiri, Kunigami Rensuke, Mikage Reo, Nagi Seishiro, Barou Shoei, Michael Kaiser, Tabito Karasu x Fem!Reader

Tags: fluff, established relationship, shopping, kisses, teasing, lots of blushing, flustered BLLK boys

A/N: I've always been a little shy when going into a lingerie shop tbh and I don't know why.

GETS FLUSTERED - Isagi, Chigiri, Kunigami

He's a blushing mess before you even step into the shop, covering his eyes, not sure where to look because everywhere he does look there's something that he thinks you'd look really good in. When you ask him for his opinion all he can do is stammer out a quick answer just to get out of there fast because the thoughts that he is having right now are far from pure.

"We're going in t-there? Can I even- I don't want to make you feel awkward though. Of course I think they'd look pretty on you but... Okay fine, but just for a little bit. I can just stand off to the side and... oh my g- that looks really, uh, really... awesome and pretty... I gotta go! Meet you by the bathrooms!"

STANDS THERE AWKWARDLY - Rin, Nagi, Karasu

He's calm as you enter but when you're looking through things he just stands awkwardly by your side, rubbing the back of his neck. Hearing the little whispers around you two he gets self conscious and tries not to think about the fact that you will be wearing what ever you pick. Stands outside the changing booth, holding your jacket and politely nodding at whatever you show him, trying very hard not to show you how nervous he is.

"Get in and get out. Simple enough. Yeah, its just lingerie, I've seen you in te before so it doesn't faze me. So uhm, ahem, how long do people usually spend shopping for these things? Just curious. I'm sure that what ever you pick will look great on you sweetheart."

PEAKS AT THE PRODUCTS - Sae, Reo

Even though he's seen you wearing pretty, even sexy, lingerie he can't help but be a little curious about all the different kinds there are. Imagining you in them, you wearing it just for him, it makes him happy to think about. So when you ask him for his opinion he's is very honest, and when you see him eyeing a particular piece you get a little smirk, pick it up, kiss him and wink at him on your way to the changing booth.

"These look nice, I like the material. The pattern would look good on you don't you think. Hm, lets see, you have one like this so maybe something a little more subtle. Don't get me wrong I'll love you in anything, just offering some expert opinions as I've seen quite a few of these on you."

WANTS TO SEE YOU RIGHT AWAY - Bachira, Barou, Kaiser

He's standing outside the changing booth, swaying from foot to foot, a big grin od anticipation on his face. He saw what you picked, very sexy. He can't wait to see you, and even more importantly he can't wait to take it off you. Well aware of his intentions you quickly pull him into the booth with you, telling him to be very quiet if he wants to touch. If he can't stop talking and complimenting you then you'll have to kiss him to shut him up.

"Done yet babe? I wanna see you! It's not weird, I'm gonna be the one looking and taking it off, so naturally I wanna see how pretty you look before that happens. In there? For real? Okay! Holy shit babe, you're... I wanna take it off right now. Haha, a kiss isn't a threat, it the promise of a good time, go right ahead."

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diagonal-queen · 23 days

Note

Omg you're backkkk<3 I hope uni's going well for you!

Maybe the Hunting Dogs with a s/o who's kind of mean/petty?

Hunting Dogs with a mean S/O

♡ pairing: Fukuchi Ouchi, Jouno Saigiku, Tecchou Suehiro, Teruko Okura (platonic), Tachihara Michizou x gn!Reader

♡ synopsis: How are the Hunting Dogs with a mean and petty S/O?

♡ cw: Swearing, u r a BULLY >:((, dw it's pretty chill though, non-graphic NSFW with Jouno, teensy bit of NSFW with Tachihara, mentions of violence, crime and torture

note: ahhh hello yes i'm back! uni's pretty great actually. i love being able to tell people i go to law school lmao, it makes me feel smarter than i am. uhh but i've been swamped and a bit busy, and i'm going back home for a week so i might not be super active over the next couple weeks, i'm so sorry my babies </3 but i'll still be lurking in case you wanna chat! as always, apologies for errors and i hope you enjoy x

Fukuchi:

Mf you think he cares?? He hired Jouno and Tachihara because they committed crimes, and he's more than happy to keep Teruko around. Bro doesn't give a FUCK that you're mean

If you're dating Fukuchi you clearly do give a shit about the welfare of society and world peace, so your individual quirks are just that. Quirks

He will fully let you just be a dickhead sometimes, because...like, why not?

I feel like Fukuchi is obviously often a very intimidating individual who strikes fear and commands respect from everyone else. But you? You just walk all over him

In some ways for him it's probably kind of refreshing to have someone around him who doesn't idolise him at all, or look up to him as a superior. It gets exhausting, for sure. Sometimes he just wants to be humbled and that's so okay Fukuchi, you deserve it actually /mean-spirited and condescending

Don't get me wrong it's not like you're an abusive partner! You're still obviously nice to your partner and you love him, but you definitely don't go out of your way to sugarcoat things or try to avoid any necessary confrontations

And Fukuchi genuinely really respects that about you. He's pretty similar like that, though still definitely goofier than you

I mean he won't want you sitting around with an RBF when he's at formal events and whatnot, because that really wouldn't have the best impression, but he's usually very gung ho about letting you be yourself

You're lucky he loves you man...lmao

Jouno:

He loves it. Full stop.

You two are just sadist central over here. Like he'll be torturing a suspect and you're just watching. Bored. Not a care in the world

(Jouno, I don't think you're legally allowed to invite your partner to watch you do your job- much less one like this, but...eh...)

You two are always just talking shit about people to each other, and like when you're out in public on dates you're just whispering to each other and judging people T-T

Lowkey kinda gets turned on when you guys argue. He thinks it's hot when you get heated and angry. Usually it ends in rough "passionate hugging", and the pillowtalk is when you both actually resolve the issue (dumbasses)

He might even purposefully rile you up sometimes because mf is just THAT much of a horny degenerate. You guys can call him classy and gentlemanly all you want, but we all know he's secretly deranged

Like an angry, horny goblin with a knife...someone stop him

Tbh you should probably bully him a little bit every now and then. I think he needs to be taken down a peg sometimes

Hey, he's more likely to listen to you than Tecchou, isn't he? Besides, it's nothing genuinely malicious. Just couple's banter

Oh, you guys are fucking LEGENDS at the couple's banter. Though you never do it in public, because a lot of the times the things you both tell each other as jokes can come off as really cruel jabs

Nah your senses of humour are just not family-friendly (violent and malicious)

You guys have very strange ways of showing your love and affection. But, hey, it works for you and that's what's important :)

Tecchou:

Ah yes, arguably the least meanie of all of the Hunting Dogs. Yeah uh he doesn't really like you at first

Tecchou doesn't understand being mean just for the sake of it. I mean like, for Teruko, she uses it in her career, and Jouno is sadistic and weird and also uses it in his career. You're just petty because you can be

But the more time you spend together the more he realises that you're really not that bad- you're really just more of the loveable asshole type

An acquired taste, yes, but this is Tecchou we're talking about! That's his thing!

He learns to appreciate the things about you that many others would probably consider flaws. He influences you for the better definitely...

...BUT you also kinda make him worse

He will adopt your 'deal with it bitch' attitude sometimes, but it doesn't hinder his relationships or work so it's fiiiiine

(Jouno isn't a huge fan of it though...but at the same time he kind of respects you)

Tecchou probably won't admit it but he really likes to listen to you rant and bitch about people you don't like. He just likes to listen to you be angry about trivial things, he finds it equal parts endearing and entertaining

If you're mean to someone who deserves it? Well I mean...who is he to stop you?

At the end of the day you're definitely emotionally self-sufficient, so that's one less part of you for him to fret over. All's well that ends well or some shit idk

Teruko (platonic):

You guys are literally the best of friends

She's the loud fiery kind of mean and you are the 'I will straight up meticulously ruin your life' kind of mean

You on some r/nuclearrevenge type shit and she fucking loves that for you

Like she's fully willing to plot and scheme with you and do whatever mean shit you suggest. You two are menaces and she should absolutely not be a military soldier

Teruko WILL smite your enemies. And by smite your enemies I mean she will actively do what she can to ruin the lives of people you don't like, with absolutely no remorse (pretty sure she actually commits crimes to do this)

She LIVES for your cruel one-liners and clever insults. Every time she hears one she absolutely hollers

Teruko enjoys it when you're mean to the other Hunting Dogs (except Fukuchi). They can handle a couple bitchy words so it's not a huge deal, but she's just extra amused by it

For the record you're not *mean* mean, you're just...humbling them (which let's be real they could use from time to time (Jouno, again, looking at you))

Nobody is surprised by your guys' friendship really

You're a dangerous pair. Please stop

Teruko kinda likes that you hold grudges so frequently because she'll never tire of hearing you shittalk the same exact people and events over and over again

She'll shittalk them too

Dia doesn't approve of this friendship

Tachihara:

You guys know that scene in B99 where Jake says that he can't decide if he's scared of Amy or turned on by her and then decides that he's both? Yea, that's Tachihara with you

He is a good person at heart, and outside of his mafia gangster persona he's really not that mean, and as such he does not encourage mean behaviour. But like, when you do it? Mm...

Bro is WHIPPED

Lowkey he probably gets some of his mafia persona ideas from you 💀

His mafia coworkers have no questions about how you two get along, and they generally like you. The other Hunting Dogs have a few more questions

Tachihara isn't some shy, quiet introvert, but he is generally pretty chill and a nice person. They like to playfully tease him about how different the two of you are (though if it gets too far he knows he can count on you to rip them a new one with no issue)

Dw they still like you though! Especially Teruko

He has absolutely no problems with you for being cold and blunt. It's nothing he himself can't handle, and in some ways it actually makes talking to you easier

Again, I'll stress that you're not mean to him, you're just not the most lovey-dovey person out there. But you DO put effort in and that's what Tachihara cares about, even if it isn't in a stereotypical way

If anything else, you're certainly loyal!

Tachihara loves you for all of your different eccentricities, and he's also kinda turned on by them. Win-win? Win-win.

taglist~ ♡ @gettinshiggywithit, @fyodorhatr, @flower-of-darkness, @bejeweledgirl, @kokoenjiandco, @pinkiipeachiikeen

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gamarancianne · 3 months

Note

Hii I just read your rules and i think every thing is altight 🎀.I have benn carving some angst and had this idea for Helion x reader from acotar, where they have been with each other for a long time (before he became a High Lord), he says that he wants an open relationship, at first the reader agrees, after the years go by and Lady Autum heppens, she starts to be colder to Helion and becoms insecure about their relationship. Fast forward Helion throws a ball where someone start to flirt with him even though the reader is literally on his arm, he goes for some drinks or whatever which gives the reader the chance to escape, she does. After an hour or so Helion notices she is gone, and starts to look for her, he cant find her untill he asks a gaurd, who tells him she went to their bedroom, he finds her at first he is playfull but then relizes something is wrong. I would love if Helion said something like " you can't just leave me, I love you and we are together you cant do that, pleas" while crying hard. You can finish it however you like, presonaly a lot of angst and groveling at Helions side. If you dont fell like writing it there is no hard feelings❤️❤️❤️

Helion x reader - Always yours, never mine part 1

Hiiii, thank you for being this nice and don't worry i wrote it because I really loved the idea and there isn't enough Helion stuff here so let's change that ! 💗

Summary: in your open relationship, Helion always sneaked around with everyone, while you stayed there, waiting for him. But that was before, because solstice is the day where you are going to change that.

Warnings: angst, arrogant Helion (tbh he can 😩), heartbreak for 400 years, curse words, not proofread, my English.

Note: I didn't expect it to be this long so I'm definitely doing a part 2 ! I hope there was enough angst for you my dear and again thank you for your request and nice word !

"Everyone is looking for the sun"

"The moon only shines thank to the sun"

You had been his for 400 years. Being 550 year-old it was almost your whole life. But him, he had never been yours. In the beginning of your relationship, Helion and you had agreed that you both still could have dates or sleep with others. Well Helion had decided, and you desperately in love, had agreed. It was then an open relationship, Helion went out with other males and females, sometimes both, and you, well, you had been on dates to play by the same rules but hadn't really appreciated it. You didn't want them , you wanted and still want Helion, only him. Of course you had your moments, heated or not, together but it wasn't a proper relationship like you could dream of. It could have been okay if you weren't aware of every time he brought a lover to his Palace and didn't heard them both from dusk till dawn, but you were and you did. Oh yes you did. Like the one time of the high lord meeting when he had flirted with Mor, and had sleeped with her, asking you to go to another room. Sometimes some females even came to him while you were dancing or cuddling together and had the guts to seduce him in front of you. The pain you felt really started when he started sneaking around with the lady of autumn when he wasn't high lord yet. He then started to forget you, the one who had been truly there for him in every moment of his life, and you became insecure. It was mentally and emotionally exhausting. But you couldn't leave him (if you still were in a relationship), you loved him too much it hurt you and it would kill you to do so.

°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°

Today was the first day of the summer solstice festivities. It was a day full of colors, sun, dances, music, food; your favourite day of the year. But not today, you didn't feel well. Yesterday Helion had brought 2 females in his bed, and your room being next to his, you had heard them. You hadn't sleep, overthinking the fact that you and Helion hadn't slept or been on a date together since weeks, even months. Maybe you didn't have to go today, you could stay in your room, looking from your window to the happy people partying and laughing. That's what you would do today, drown yourself in your eating thoughts and cry yourself to sleep. What a program. In front of your mirror, you changed your sun dress for a nightgown and went back to you giant bed. As if hearing your thoughts, someone knocked at the door. Groaning you opened it and what surprise for you to see the said Helion, a flirty smirk on his lips, leaning against the door frame. Gods was he beautiful. You almost hated him fro that, it made every discussion with him very difficult for you. His smile dropped as soon as he saw you in an other outfit than your party dress.

"What's going on love? At this hour you are normally already dressed up, dancing with everyone ?" He asked.

"Well I suppose it is not a normal day then" you answered turning your back to him when he tried to reach for you. You instantly regretted you gesture.

"Are you sure everything's okay love ?"

You turned back and gave him a small smile to reassure him, you always adored when he called you love, you could never resist him. "Yes don't worry, I am just feeling unwell, I think I'll stay here today and rest a little."

He froze, never had you ever missed a solstice day.

"No, no, no. Go dress up dear, I'm sure a dance with me will give you your energy and joy back." His teeth showed up again when he flashed you a smile.

"What? No-"

"And I won't take no as an answer" he shouted when he closed the door to leave you alone in the silence of your room once again. Dressing up again, you cursed him for being this convincing and yourself for being this weak. And why would he show up exactly the moment you gathered a little courage to face him about your feelings ! But maybe this time he would change, and everything would be different. You had so much hope about him. Leaving your room, you frowned and searched him in the crowd. You relaxed when you smelt his now well-known scent invading your nose and felt his arms circling your waist.

"What's going on in that pretty head of yours"

"Nothing really" I answered getting out of his grasp leaving him frowning a little.

He regained his composure quickly "Then let's dance dear."

You both walked to the dancefloor and pushed someone or two on the way. As the music began, Helion led the dance, and you followed, twirling at the beautiful notes. To anyone who looked at you, it seemed that you were two beautiful gods or angels, coming from the sky and flying in the sun. Two gods meant for eachother. But Helion didn't think that, nor did you, spiralling in your insecure thoughts and doubts about yourself. But you still danced for hours, leaving the crowd only to drink or eat.

Exceptionally, you both went out in the gardens, arm in arms and hand in hand to talk intimately a little. But unfortunately, your finally rediscovered happiness was short timed when a young fae lady approached you two. Well she approached him of course. She was everything you weren't, gorgeous, a bright smile, tall, thin. Indeed, how could Helion could really love you after people like her ? Then again he abandoned you again to yourself. And almost broke down in front of everybody when you saw them dance together, and cursed yourself once again the same day for being so stupid to think that one ridiculously charming cheeky smile from him would change anything. You ran away to your bedroom, tears streaming down your face as the pain was stinging your entire body. When you loved, you loved hard, with your soul, your body, you whole. But when you felt hurt then everything in you was heart, and there wasn't a single part you that was okay.

You cried and cried on your bed without even taking the time to step out the beautiful gown you wore today. A gown he had gifted you. Damn him ! Everything you did, everything you thought about reminded you of him! He was like oxygen and water for you, a living need, everything in you was attracted by him every single second of your whole life. It was at the same time making you breathe fresh air, and killing you.

Helion, him, noticed you missing only a few dances later with that young lady when he had the project to bring her back into his bed for a sleepless night. He had the intention to inform you not to wait for him but he couldn't find you. In the heat of his moment with his futur lover, he got upset at the fact that you somehow ruined it, and grew more and more frustrated. He excused himself to the lady and went quickly and furiously to your room after asking a guard about it. There wasn't an ounce of worry in his mind.

But when he found your door open, and heard your not so silent sobs, he calmed down a little and came to your bed. Feeling his weight on the other side of the bed, you stood up quickly and wiped, in vain the tears on your cheeks.

"You crying just ruined my tonight date you know ?" Helion chuckled thinking it would make you feel better.

But in the contrary, you snapped at him and lashed out all your feelings and emotions piled up and invalidated since 400 years. Enough was enough.

"How dare you say that to the only woman who have been supporting you for every damn moment of your life? How dare you hurt my feelings and my confidence again and again and again ? During those 400, I've given you all that I had even more, I've given you all from myself : my soul, my heart, my mind and my body. But what have you given me back ? Nothing, except a broken heart and insecurity that's eating me up every fucking day of my life ! A life now resumed to hope that someday you will understand what I'm going through, you will change for the better ! But no ! It's always the same thing ! I hope and hope for you but you still disappoint me at the end of the day going back to your bitches while I stay here, abandoned again by the love of my life, the only one in my mind, you. I'm tired and exhausted to feel empty every time I see you with another while you forget about me. Some even seduce you while I'm here with you !"

Helion froze at your words, never as he ever considered or thought that you could be unwell in this relationship. "But what didn't you say anything? Plus you had also the right to go with other males or females, let me recall we both agreed to those terms in the beginning of our relation-"

"No we didn't! You said it, and I was hopelessly in love with you so it was the better I could get from you ! And I tried and tried and tried to go on other dates but they were never you ! As telling you this, I can't because everytime I see you apart from heated moment, when I try to speak to you about it, another one of your numerous lover interrupt us and you don't care about it one bit! It's like I'm only there to sleep with you and nothing more where as you go on dates and give your lovers prince princess treatment ! So tell me ! What did I do to deserve that ? What did I do ? Because I am completely and utterly yours, but Helion you have to face it, you were never mine." Rage and frustration tears were flooding your face from your angry eyes, and you were out of breath.

"Are you breaking up with me ?" He asked softly.

"Oh gods I can't believe it ! It's the only thing you have to say right now ? After all I've told you ? Then yes, yes I'm breaking up with you ! I'm done with this, with you !"

"But you can't do this love ! Please you can't leave me we are together! I love you please! Don't do that !" He pleaded and kneeled in front of you, gripping your thighs.

"As much as I love you, and as it's hurting to do so, I can't do this anymore, I don't know who I am anymore. Every time I woke up, my goal was to make you change or to spend a little time with you ! I've been erasing myself to the thought of you and I need to get out of here in order to find myself again. I'm sorry."

"But where will you go ? You live here ? It's your home! I am your home !" He cried.

"Not anymore I'm sorry. And Mor will welcome me for a time, I already sent a note to Rhys, he'll come when my stuff will be packed." As my voice broke down on the final words that seemed too real for me, I wanted it to be a nightmare, and to wake up tangled in the sheets and his arms, I got out of his firm grasp difficultly and gathered my things.

Rhys appeared instantly, and I took one last look at Helion's bent form and wet eyes before we disappeared as quickly as he came, in smoke of black shadow.

#helion x reader #helion acotar #acotar x reader #acotar #acotar x you #helion x you #rhysand #day court #writers on tumblr #angst

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nyxwanderland · 7 months

Text

♡ everything about you

pairing → gojo satoru x reader genre → fluff warnings → stretch marks, mentions of pregnancy (nothing bad) tbh idk what's the difference between being self-conscious and insecure since english is not my first language so i have no idea what to classify this word count → 1315

satoru was thrilled to finally take a break and spend his time with you and his three-year-old daughter on a vacation after all those tiring missions that caused him to come home late at night—sometimes even early in the morning—only for him to go back to work a few hours later. you definitely were as well; you couldn't wait to have your husband more to yourself (and your daughter). however, there was just one problem.

you looked at your body in the bathroom mirror with a disappointed look in your eyes. you wore a light blue bikini which satoru insisted on getting you along with ten other swimsuits that would look stunning on you—his words, despite telling him you wouldn't be needing that many.

it was perfect. it fit you just right, and your body looked better than you had expected. the color complemented your skin tone, and the bikini accentuated all your best features. you loved it.

the real problem was the stretch marks on the lower part of your stomach. you couldn't help but feel self-conscious about them, as they seemed to stand out against the flawless backdrop of your bikini. despite knowing that stretch marks are a natural part of many people's bodies, especially after pregnancy, you couldn't shake off the nagging insecurity they brought.

"i'll just wear a shirt over it," you mumbled as you walked towards the suitcase and took out a white oversized t-shirt, wearing it over your bikini. you sighed as you took a look at the mirror again. although you really wanted to go out without the shirt, you didn't feel confident enough to do so.

you heard giggles entering the bedroom, causing you to smile a bit and almost making you forget the self-consciousness you felt just a moment ago. you exited the bathroom to see your husband wearing a floral beach shirt with buttons undone, revealing his abs, and his signature black glasses, and your daughter held in his arms, wearing her swimsuit and her hair tied into two ponytails. "we're ready!" satoru exclaimed happily.

"let's go, mommy!" d/n said, her voice unable to contain her excitement.

you went closer to them and took d/n from his arms for you to hold her. you attacked her face with kisses. "you look so adorable, my love!" you said. "i love you so much."

"i love you too—ah! it tickles!" d/n said between her cute laughs and tried to move her face from the attack, unable to bear the feeling, when satoru came and copied your actions behind her. "daddy, not you too!"

you stopped the 'torture' a few seconds later, so did he. you gave your little girl one last kiss on her forehead before letting her go and making her stand on the floor. "oh, I forgot my toys!" d/n gasped and ran to her room. "how are we going to make a sandcastle without them!? please don't go without me!"

you laughed at how your daughter looked adorable running away and quickly reassured her, "don't worry, sweetheart. we'll wait for you!"

you turned to face satoru, who looked quite sulky all of a sudden. "what about me, baby?" satoru pouted, his lower lip stuck out. "i also need my kisses."

you chuckled as you cupped his face in your hands. "come here, love." you brought his face closer to yours in order to close the gap between yours and his lips.

"there," you said, smiling. satoru was indeed satisfied, as you could tell from his grinning like a child getting candy. "now let's go, shall we?"

"you're not wearing your bikini?" he noticed.

ah shit, you thought. of course, it's impossible to get away with stuff when it's satoru you're dealing with.

you nervously let out a laugh. "um, I don't feel like wearing it today..." you muttered while playing with the hem of your shirt and looking at his feet.

"but you were so excited to wear them," he said, suddenly becoming worried. "are they not to your liking? do they not fit? are they defective? you could've told me while i was—"

"it's not that, satoru," you interrupted his babble. "it's just..." you trailed off, debating whether you should actually tell him or come up with an excuse—

nah, the excuse wouldn't work. not even in your dreams.

you sighed defeatedly. instead of telling him, you took the shirt off to show the root of your worries, revealing your body.

satoru's blue eyes widened and his breath hitched a little. although he had seen everything of you, you never fail to make him go crazy and take in all of your beauty as if he was looking at you for the first time.

you were looking at him expectantly, waiting for his response. your husband cleared his throat. "what's wrong with it? you look gorgeous."

you couldn't help but blush. you receive compliments every now and then from him, but they make your heart flutter every time. you never got used to how he articulated his words just to praise you, and never will.

"can't you see?"

"see what?"

"the stretch marks."

satoru's eyes scanned our body for the marks until he spotted them. he knitted his eyebrows together in confusion. to say he was frustrated was an understatement. "what are you even saying? those marks are the best part!"

now it was your turn to be puzzled. "what do you mean? how can you possibly think these stretch marks look beautiful on me?" you asked, as a lump appeared in your throat and you felt tears collecting in your eyes.

satoru smiled softly and gently held your hands, looking into your eyes. "to me, they are a reminder of the strength of your body," he explained. "they remind me that you carried a life—our daughter—for months to bring her into this world. they make you ten times more beautiful." he went on his knees to be eye level with your stomach.

you didn't understand what he was trying to do at first when he started leaving trails of kisses, tracing the marks on your body. "i love everything about you, baby. you don't need to worry about these little things. your stretch marks are beautiful. you are beautiful, y/n."

you couldn't help but let the tears fall, trickling down your cheeks. you felt so loved, and now you were overwhelmed with gratitude. you already knew it, but it was in that moment that you again realized how lucky you were to have someone who saw the beauty in every part of you, flaws and all. the weight of self-doubt and insecurity lifted off your shoulders as you embraced the unconditional love he had for you.

your husband stood up and looked at you lovingly as you sniffled and wiped away your tears. he wrapped his arms around you and pulled you into a warm embrace, kissing the top of your head. "thank you, satoru. i love you.."

"i love you too, y/n."

"i found my toys!" d/n entered the room enthusiastically. "let's go!"

when you and satoru let go of each other, she saw you completely and gasped, jumping up and down. "mommy, you look so pretty!"

your cheeks turned light pink. "really?"

"yes!"

you went towards her and held her, kissing her face repeatedly once again. "you look prettier, sweetie."

you felt yourself being lifted off the ground until you realized satoru picked you up bridal style, with d/n in your arms. "let's get going, ladies." he announced.

with a smile, you nestled closer to satoru, enjoying the feeling of being in his arms. "lead the way," you said playfully. as satoru carried you and d/n out of the room, excitement filled the air, and you couldn't help but feel grateful for this beautiful moment.

✩

you're beautiful how ever you are! i love you!

#hehe i love satoru #dw shibuya arc never happened #oh to be married to gojo satoru #jjk x reader #jujutsu kaisen #gojo x reader #satoru x reader

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sssturniolofart · 6 months

Text

are we there yet?

warnings: droogs, smut, kissing, touching

Relations: Chris x Yn

locals n younger fan dni but idrc🤷🏽‍♀️

I was sitting on the couch with Matt and Chris while Nick was in the kitchen making a "special drink" for me. we were all bored, I was laying on Chris's lap while my legs were in Matt's.

Finally Nick came back with a glass of a bunch of different types of liquor mixed together. I sat up leaning onto Chris and Nick handed me the glass.

Once it left his finger tips I took a big swig of the drink and passed it onto Chris. I was trying not to gag because of how bad it was to take down.

"Bleh, I don't like it" I exclaimed looking over at Chris who had took two sips and handed it to his brother matt, who took a big chug of it.

"I don't mind it, I think it's nice." matt responded, I looked at matt and stuck my tongue out and shook my head.

"I was just about to say that" Chris giggled, then he laid his hand on my lap. "We should go for a drive" Chris said, out of no where.

"I'm the only person that can drive well and I just took a sip of liquor.. your gonna have to wait buddy" matt said looking at Chris.

"it's okay nobody will tell" I blurted.

matt and Chris shrugged and Nick immediately disagreed "nope, nope, nope, nope. you just took a swig of liquor, all three of you, not going." he ranted

"oh shut up, nick" Chris yawned. "he's smart, he knows how to drive. and you don't HAVE to go with us" he said smirking at nick while he slowly moved his hand into my inner thigh.

"no I rather go but first go try to piss it out or something.." nick says looking panicked.

"not sure if that's how it works." I giggled and got up from leaning on Chris. Chris and Matt both got up after me and we all walked outside to Matt's car. (it wasn't the van)

me and Chris took the backseats and we knew nick was gonna follow us soon so we waited for nick to hurry his ass up.

Matt started the car and queued a few songs before nick finally came out. "what took you so fucking long?" matt asked, with a lot of mattitued. "why does it matter?" Nick snapped back.

"he just wants to know why it took you so god damn long" Chris added. "WELL IF YOU MAY FUCKING KNOW I WENT TO GO PISS, FUCKTARDS" Nick screamed.

After nick was done screaming he got into the car and started talking to me like nothing happened.

After awhile I was leaning my head into Chris shoulder and the music was loud, we were passing the cart around and each taking a couple hits from it as matt was driving.

"what if we went to a party?" nick smiled, looking around for approval. matt smirked and slowly nodded, then looked back at me and chris. "I'm down." he said.

I looked at Chris and he shook his head. "tbh, I'm not really feeling a party tonight" He said looking down at me.

"Whattt? Chris you always want to party. wth happened?" matt said.

"I just want to cuddle with my beautiful girl tonight." he smiled, hugging me tighter.

"you can stay in the car then." nick said rolling his eyes. matt agreed.

"okay." Chris said, as he pulled me into his lap.

"find me the nearest one nick" matt smiled turning the music up even louder.

"I love you" Chris whispered in my ear. "I love you too" I whispered back.

he rested his hands on my ass but slowly caressed his thumb across the top of my ass. I adjusted myself so I could get comfortable on his lap but as I did that I heard a small groan from him.

once I was comfortable I could feel his semi-boner against the side of my pussy. "sorry" he said nervously blushing. I giggled and blushed and slowly started to move against it.

he slowly guided me on how to move and soon I got the hang of it, we slowly started sloppy kissing.

his brothers weren't paying attention to us so we continued what we were doing.

I was wearing a small jean skirt and a tight blue t shirt, Chris was wearing his gray sweatpants and a hoodie.

he slid his hands under my skirt to pull down my black panties, as he was taking them off he laid me down in the seats and hovered on top of me.

matt was driving and bopping his head to the music, and Nick was shouting the lyrics to the song, they were both high so who knows what was going on in their minds.

Chris started kissing my neck and I wrapped my legs around body and could feel his boner thru his pants on my clit.

"fuck yn, your so hot" he whispered in the crook of my neck.

"fuck me then" I whispered back with the biggest smirk on my face. he glanced over at his brothers and then quickly pulled his sweats and boxers down.

He placed his cock at my entrance and slid it up my folds. he then pushed himself into me and groaned pretty loudly but surprisingly the boys couldn't hear. he started thrusting his hips into me.

we were moaning and thrusting onto each other , leaving sloppy kisses and hickies on eachother.

"fuck ma" he moaned, "fu- fuck Chris im gonna cum" I moaned quietly.

"are we there yet?" he smirked.

I nodded quickly and came around his cock as he came inside of me.

"shit, how are we gonna clean this up?" I asked. Chris grabbed some left over napkins from our mc donalds trip from the other day and cleaned himself and I up.

he put his clothes back on and I slid my panties back up.

we finally arrived at the party and matt and Nick got out to go inside as me and Chris stayed in the car.

Chris laid on me and fell asleep while I was caressing his hair and looking at my phone, waiting for the boys to come back.

...

BAHAHAHA BYE- THIS IS ACTUALLY GOOD.

@sturniolox3 @sturniololoverr @sturnphilia @sturnsblunt @strniohoeee @judebellinghamsgf22

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beatrixstonehill2 · 2 months

Text

Soooo this rich photographer flew me out to his waterfront penthouse overlooking the city..... You know, he did what photographers do and filmed me, took pics, got me nice and drunk. He showed me his place, mind you he's in a fancy suit and I'm in this bikini, my cock is basically falling out of it and I'm rock hard the whole time I'm there. He shows me this gorgeous portfolio of other trans girls he's worked with, mostly videos on his computer, and oh my god..... I started fondling my cock as he kept showing me some of the prettiest girls I've ever seen, huge breasts, curvy asses, perfect smile, juicy cocks.... But every video ended with a shirtless man. I didn't get it and he told me not to worry, so I kept playing with my cock, sipping my wine as he showed me more.....

The videos always ended the same. Some handsome guy flexing his muscles, looking really hot tbh, most of them had beards or well-groomed facial hair, none were shaven. They all exuded the kind of masculinity I find super hot, def the kind of guys I love my plump ass to be fucked by. The photographer finally turned to me and told me the men were all the very same people as the sexy girls he showed me. He had a really big kink for convincing trans girls to detrans. I was floored, but kept jerking my cock..... He saw this and smiled. He told me he'd happily pay me 100K to detransition. I jerked super fast and nutted, drooling like a good little whore, eyes rolling back......

"100K? You want to see me become a boy that badly???" I panted, jerking my flaccid cock as it drooled more cum, soon getting erect again.....

"Just look at you, already a machine. Imagine what that cock could do on testosterone. I'd love to see you give up becoming a girl for good. Embrace being a guy, which is what you really are, princess.

I bit my lip, my cock responding so well to his words, nice and full again. "Please..... I like being a girl but I mean.... You really really wanna see me detrans, I can tell!"

"I do. I want to see you get muscular, pumped full of so much T and steroids nobody would ever know you were living as such a pretty girl, or at least a decent imitation, not that you pass, darling. You're hot but that cock is a dead give away, and you still look like a boy, but you already knew that, didn't you?" He stroked my chin.

I nodded softly. "I don't pass at all, do I?"

"Not in the slightest, you poor misguided fakegirl. I'm surprised anyone even thinks to gender you correctly. It definitely doesn't help that you're so proud of your cock and flaunt it all over social media, walking around in dresses with a full erection. You can just see people roll their eyes forcing themselves to call you a girl to be nice. But like I said, your face is still very masculine, totally a dead give away. Are you sure you aren't already growing facial hair? I swear I see a shadow."

I was blushing so hard, fully erect and jerking super hard again. "I mean, estrogen only helps so much, I started transitioning at fourteen! But by then..... and sometimes I forget to take my hormones and, ummmmm...... soooo, this is how deep my voice actually is." I used my real voice, sounding pretty much like a guy.

"Wow, I mean you still sounded like a boy pretending to be a girl before but I had no idea you basically already went through male puberty..... that explains why your cock is so huge. You you're pretty much not even a trans girl, you're a femboy with implants?"

I nodded, cumming again, shooting rope after rope. "Mmmmm, maybe? Sorry I don't pass very well..... I hope you still find me sexy...."

"Oh, all the sexier, in fact I'm going to take that fat ass of yours for a nice ride in a moment..... just after I give you your first official T-shot, so let's celebrate you no longer pretending to be a girl. From now on you'll be a good boy and masculinize yourself as much as possible, OK?"

"Yes..... sir..... anything else before you have your way with me?"

"I want you to post a video of yourself to your Instagram, talking in your real voice, that you're detransitioning and getting your DD implants yanked out next week."

"OK..... whatever you like. ❤️ I need to give up playing pretend..... thank you for helping me!"

"It's my pleasure, helping boys like you is my greatest passion."

Needless to say..... I won't be looking back, and I have a few more fakegirl friends I think I'll send his way....

#detrans kink #mtf detrans kink #mtftm kink #misgender kink

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lowkeyrobin · 2 months

Note

Jock!reader who's like really nice to everyone and has a crush on Ethan and tries to flirt with him while Ethan is tutoring him and FAILS MISERABLY and Ethan just thinks it the most adorable thing ever ahhhh plss🙏

- ♣️

YES YES YES HELLO ♣️ ANON!!! welcome my third child 🙏🙏🙏🙏 literallt love u sm thank you for this pookie

ETHAN MORGAN ; flirty jock and flustered geek

summary ; jock!reader who has a crush on ethan and fails successfully to flirt with him

warnings ; language, cheesey stuff lol, reader is described as a basketball player but can totally be changed, this also isn't that great tbh

word count ; 1k

masterlist

You rest your letterman jacket on the back of the chair you sit on, being greeted by Ethan. He opens his binder to the homework in the Geometry packet, and you do the same, mentally preparing yourself. You notice his white binder is covered in stickers and some reference to vampires, witches, the supernatural, and beyond. Ethan was kind of your friend, you were more than acquaintances but you didn't talk outside of Geometry and English class.

You were one of the very few nice people on the basketball team, or maybe you were just a decent person and didn't judge people all too quickly. Otherwise, you didn't mind needing the tutoring from Ethan, you appreciated it really, if you failed another test you could be at risk for getting kicked off the team and you might lose the opportunity for a scholarship to college.

"Okay, so, what exactly do you need help with?" The brunette asks, looking up at you as he runs a hand through his hair, looking a little nervous.

"I just don't know how to like, figure out what shape they are like, how Mr. D wants us to, and like how to find the second base or the height" You explain, "Like, I know how I just can't remember the like, equations, I guess. And when I do, I get the math wrong"

He nods, "Okay, so, you know how to find the areas and perimeters well enough, though, right?"

You nod.

As he begins to explain how to solve your problems, you notice his orange t-shirt, accentuating the perfectly placed blush on his cheeks, faint but definitely pink. The way he spoke to dumb it down for you a bit but to not infantilize you made you smile a bit, seeing as he cared about your feelings. You notice him rub the nape of his neck, seemingly anxious or nervous around you, or maybe uncomfortable because he didn't know how to teach, like how Mr. D should be teaching you this and not poor Ethan, wasting his study hall for you.

You were already very, very aware of your crush on Ethan Morgan. He was your every thought, he was in your blood, in your ears, in your eyes, and in your tears. (weezer reference)

But, now was not the time to dilly dally about with high school crushes, these next 35 minutes could potentially determine your entire future. You needed this free ride to college, otherwise you'd turn into another old person working a job that pays minimum wage for maximum effort.

As time lugged on, you couldn't help but not focus on your homework and instead focus on Ethan and his gorgeous face. He looks back up at you after asking a question, seeing you were totally zoned out staring at him.

"Y/n?" He waves a hand in front of your eyes, trying to snap you back to reality. (eminem reference, wow I'm on a roll today)

You blink, "Oh, shit, sorry, uh, what'd you say, pretty boy?"

You couldn't even think about the words spilling out of your mouth until after they already fell. Those words hit Ethan like a falling anvil, his face turning bright red as he tries to shrug it off as you were just surprised and trying to be nice to him.

"Uh, this is the equation, uhm, try solving it"

You awkwardly nod, writing down the equation and putting in the numbers with the respective variables. You solve the equation, ending up with 24 for the height. He looks confused, having got a different answer. He scooches over to you, trying to figure out where you went wrong.

"Y'know, you're like a walking calculator. A cute one though" You shrug, he looks at you with a slightly confused and amused face, "I dunno what that even means, sorry"

He nods, "Oh, okay, you I think multiplied by two instead of dividing"

"Oh, whoops" You pick your pencil back up, fixing your mistake.

"There you go!" Ethan smiles, "It's just little mistakes, you'll build on it" He lightly pats your shoulder.

"Did you know Ancient Romans used to brush their teeth with their urine? And it actually worked?" You randomly ask him, fidgeting with your pencil.

Ethan blinks, slightly confused before he lightly laughs. "I hate you, focus on the Geometry, no stalling"

"Do you hate me or are we about to kiss right now?"

"Dude. Did you get that off Pinterest or something?"

"...Yeah"

He hides a laugh and bites his lip, "Okay so you-"

"Damn, are you Terms and Conditions? Cause I'd love to blindly agree to whatever you say"

Ethan quickly covers his mouth, "Shut up!"

You laugh a bit, "Sorry, sorry. I didn't sleep for shit last night and I'm getting frustrated cause I don't understand this"

"You'll learn!" Ethan smiles, shaking you lightly by the shoulders.

Some time later, the bell is about to ring, dismissing you to lunch.

"Thanks Eth" You lightly smile, "Oh, uh-" You reach into your backpack, pulling out some homemade cookies in a plastic Tupperware, handing them to him. "These are for you. I have to go to lunch in a second" You say, pulling your backpack over your shoulders, carrying your binder and pencil in hand.

"Oh- thank you!" He smiles, watching you stand up. The smile falters a bit due to awkwardness, "Uh- I have lunch next period too-"

"Bye Ethan, see you later! Love you, dude!"

Ethan is left confused and slightly shocked, cheeks a little red.

He knew you had a crush on him, he felt the same way, but he loved seeing you miserably fail to flirt with him. You were no romantic, if anything, a hopeless romantic in your thoughts.

He smiles, looking down at the red-lid Tupperware, seeing soft, chocolate chip cookies inside, his favorite.

"Thanks, Y/n," He whispers with a little smile, then gathers up his binder and books, shoving them in his backpack.

He notices a tingling feeling in his face, feeling a familiar warmth on his face as he thought about the nicknames and dumb pickup lines you'd spilled out of your lips that past half hour. God, would he love to kiss those lips of yours. He sighs, realizing he should definitely let you do that some more before he asks about it at all.

Thankfully, he'd been able to have slipped a note into your binder before you left.

"Hey Y/n! If you need any help tomorrow I'll be in the library. Bring your pickup lines with you, and I might help you not get kicked off the team. -Ethan"

#lowkeyrobin #mbav #mbav x reader #ethan morgan x reader #ethan morgan #ethan mbav #benny weir #rory keaner #♣️ anon #rory mbav #mbav oneshot #ethan morgan oneshot #gn reader #they/them reader #rory keaner x reader #benny weir x reader

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justanotherhh · 2 months

Text

alastor aroace semiotics: symbols/metaphors/codes (oh my!)

thinking about some of the aroace subtext, both in terms of what's definitely intentional, and things that one can pick up on within the burgeoning field of "what the heck does aspec (in this case aroace) semiology even look like in (this particular) narrative?"

there's the really obvious one of course "ace in the hole." funny as well, because ace in the hole could also reference Alastor being the card you play as a hidden advantage (potentially hinting that Rosie knows that Alastor has his own agenda and supports that, like she does in the song). Of course "Alastor is ace" is the main point of the joke, because it's a sentence that comes a little out of nowhere, and clearly confuses Alastor, because he doesn't know Stuff

2. secondly, there's the pilot episode's placing Alastor first next to and then on top of the Ace of Spades. tbh if this was an accident, it sure was a serendipitous one, because the Ace of Spades not only refers to being ace, but specifically aroace (with Hearts meaning alloace, Diamonds meaning demiace, and Clubs meaning grey-ace <- t Ace of Diamonds/Clubs are a more open to interpretation, I've seen some also use them for demiromantic and greyromantic)

3. Body language! Alastor's reactions to being propositioned or involved in a sex joke, or having to listen to romance talk ranges from discomfort (glitching), to blunt refusal/shutting down of the conversation, to boredom/distraction. I haven't made a study of Alastor's body language in detail, but I'd be interested in how his smiles potentially shift when around very sexual and/or romantic discussion, regardless of whether he's the centre of that (but probably moreso if he is). I think this would come more to the fore in future seasons if there were examples beyond Angel Dust, who also made Husk uncomfortable in the first half of s1, but Alastor -- especially in the pilot -- had very visceral reactions to Angel's "flirting/joking," moreso than anyone else, until Angel had really gone too far with Husk in ep4 (and he come onto Alastor as strongly/invasively as he did with Husk)

4. Speaking of Angel... Alastor not being present outside of a flashback in all of episode 4, and not in episode 6 either. Both episodes featured sex heavily, including Angel showing off one of his pornos, and the gang going to a sex club. Also, Valentino was in both of them (makes sense, seeing as they were Angel-centric). I wonder what Alastor feels about Valentino's whole... existence. He's also the only main s1 hotel character to not be involved in the trust exercises that lead them to the bondage/SM club. this has nothing necessarily to do with the character, but he's very much placed outside of sexual scenarios and places by the writing/plot, which is fun to notice, especially in the first two examples, as his not being in the episodes isn't actually explained. No Alastor in the sex episodes, because his fourth wall sex repulsed senses were tingling?

5. boundaries and power fantasies. that is, Alastor is a character who has very clear boundaries and ways of enforcing them. from blowing up Sir Pentious when he grabs his coat, to noping out of any space he wants to, to seizing the narrative from Vox and telling the story on his terms, to shadow tentacles (ironic), nobody touches him emotionally/physically unless they're allowed. Niffty, Rosie, and Mimzy so far appear to be the ones who have crossed into that "allowed" space the most, but considering he lets everyone (barring Lucifer and Husk, who don't want to) hug him in the finale, some of those barriers are coming down, which is another interesting analysis to make at some point

these boundaries aren't all entirely healthy either -- the way he lashes out at Husk who seems to actually be trying to look out for him (which suggests that Husk is emotionally close-ish to him, enough that he didn't realise he was overstepping), and the way he breaks down in the finale, shows that his inability to be vulnerable in front of others is... not actually a good thing. I wrote a whole bunch about how this part of Alastor's writing play into a very aroace-in-feel narrative for him, but suffice to say... a story about someone with boundaries that seems to be completely absent of "romance/sex will fix you" is refreshing. and very aroace coded

there's also a power fantasy in the idea that one can simply bend the space to avoid ones boundaries being trampled over. to be able to either nope out of a room or to make oneself so terrifying that nobody would want to try to get up in your space... it's got a little smthinsmthin of a "wish it were me" in there. being repulsed means an often constant erosion and invasion of boundaries, from people making your disgust and/or obliviousness the centre of their sex jokes, to being hyper-scrutinised and challenged every time you do or don't let someone into your space in whatever way, or challenge their notions of what's "allowed" as an aroace person. sometimes you just want to say "Demonic Powers Be Upon Ye" and be done with it

6. An Absence. most often aspec narrative is defined by an absence of allo-narrative. that is, Angel Dust, Husk, Charlie, Vaggie, Cherri, Sir Pentious, Lucifer, are set up as allo-figures with romance and sex featuring more or less in all of their stories. the only hotel residents so far who don't have that going on are Alastor and Niffty, and Niffty's story has yet to have the foundations laid out for beyond the very bare bones, and she flirts with others (her "bad boy" preference). whatever Alastor's journey is, it's not coded as alloromantic or allosexual in any way, whether through casual jokes/flirting, or a longform romantic and sexual relationship exploration, with the possible exception of...

7. Vox. the characters that Alastor seems closest to in this story are Rosie, Mimzy, Niffty, Charlie, and Husk (with the mysterious figure that owns his soul looming in the back as well). out of them, none of them are coded as anyone he's sexually or romantically involve with or heading in that direction. the last figure in Alastor's life that's very heavily figured so far is Vox. And Vox is obsessed with Alastor in a way that absolutely can be read as a bad one-sided break-up/jilted stalker type framing, with Alastor gleefully recounting his "no" when talking about their past, and otherwise putting Vox out of his mind, while almost all of Vox' big character moments revolve around how much real estate Alastor takes up in his mind (literally, considering his error message is all Alastor messaging)

Vox being a figure who is symbolically the trampler of aroace boundaries is a very good way of showing Alastor's total disinterest and even disgust (depending on whether or not he knows that Vox was/is into him), and can act as a future potential interesting barometer for other characters to be "less" invasive, but still not quite getting it to begin with (see, Angel Dust's casual flirting, Charlie's tendency to see everything from her perspective, who knows how Cherri and Lucifer might fit into this equation, and generally the sex-and-romance framing of a lot of the other narratives)

8. I talked about aroaceness being a humanising factor to Alastor in my other big ol' post I did, just want to mention it here as well. so far it exists somewhat as a Potential, in the sense that we're firmly in s1 and there's still a lot of ways this could all go, but I think it's worth mentioning as a form of foundational signposting work that's been done for his character

he's more on the dark grey end of the grey scale of all of these characters, he's manipulative, sadistic, cruel when he wants to be, petty, selfish, likes being the centre of attention + is easily rankled when he's not, and presumably he went to hell because he killed people for kicks <- these traits are not unique to him, considering the setting, but what is is the beginnings of a storyline exploring his particular relationship to vulnerability and power and why those things are a part of him in the way they are. this from the perspective of someone who is aroace (and possibly repulsed) instantly adds a potential sympathetic nuance to who he's become, similar to the layer of power fantasy mentioned above. both of these turn his narrative from a cautionary tale or a villain-played-straight (haha) trope into something much more interesting

with the semiotics of aroaceness already in place, these affect how we read the foundations for the rest of his narrative and where it's going. quite simply, it's one of the biggest factors right now that make all his other story beats more resonant and interesting, depending of course on where they take it...

9. his smile. since we've gotten deep enough into meta territory now that we're in hc/future theorising country -- the smile is of course a mask, that's known to everyone. there's a lot of future opportunities for how to utilise that alongside aroaceness-as-theme-for-him. aroaceness, or just "someone where there is a noticeable lack of romantic (and hinted at sexual) interest," is usually coded through a certain shallowness. a pathologisation of behaviours -- which is another deeper analysis post to make at some point (jeez there's so many). Alastor is off-putting, yes, but he's also very confident and charming when he wants to be, he can put people at ease despite themselves (see, Charlie). It's a very interesting mask to give someone who's aroace, because it makes him complicated, rather than a simple ableist "point at the weirdo with no friends, that's our Outsider/killer."

(it also hearkens back to the humanising factor, in that his shallowness isn't because he's aroace, it's because he doesn't know how to be vulnerable with people as the person he is in a world that is incredibly amatonormative and focused on sex)

His smile can be unnerving, but it can also be disarming, give others the illusion that he's in control, make it impossible to guess his emotions (etc. basically what he said to Charlie)

so quite simply, his smile as a twisted distortion of society's demands upon people. he's not being abrupt, aloof, asocial, unkempt, or all the things aroaceness is often stereotyped as. he's performing the most acceptable normative person you can imagine. his surface is unscratcheable because of normative ideals

it's a very fun, unique-to-this-story way of potentially telling an aroace narrative. I'd be interested in what it takes to make him drop it (if he can, or if the story takes the route of accepting that he can't -- the man who laughs kinda vibes) and whether that will tie into a piece of his story that itself takes on aroace proportions (perhaps related to worrying for others in a non-romantic way, perhaps in relation to being able to or being forced to be vulnerable in a non-romantic/non-sexual way, etcetc).

Potentials:

we haven't seen him around the aro/ace aroace colours yet as far as I can remember, which is a fun, easy way to signpost (see, Vox flashing the bisexual flag on his screen)

since we've had an "ace in the hole" joke, I think we could have an aro/arrow-based pun in there as well, maybe even as a deconstruction of when they're used in romantic ways -- (no aro going through his heart, too aro for cupid's arrow, idk I'm spitballing here) or as literal arrows in some way. also someone's gotta call him aces at one point, right? just cos? I feel like the "<2" emoji might be too niche (heck, maybe all of this is, but that's part of the point -- all of this should be ways we're able to signpost aro and ace and aroace characters), but there's characters who know modern emoji and online lingo

other asexual symbols I know of include stating a preference for cake or pizza over sex and/or dating and the black and white rings (worn respectively on right an left middle fingers, although since they only have four fingers in this world...)

I've really enjoyed "clueless cannibal about modern lingo" Alastor comics, including the one about serving cunt and the one about eating ass both by @nouverx. it goes nicely on from his being confused about "ace in the hole," with that HH style sexual comedy. there's a whole bunch of that one could play with

speaking of slang, confirmed bachelor has often meant gay, but the aro/ace community and the gay community has overlapped as long as anyone has been non-conforming. @creepysora suggested a gentleman never kisses and tells, either as Alastor being unaware that it's actually about sex, or as an aware deconstruction of the phrase that gives him the space (similar to confirmed bachelor) to sneakily go, "go mind your own fucking business 😊!" I'm sure there are others that could fulfill a similar purpose of allowing Alastor a certain kind of old-timey buffer

similar to the episode of Bojack Horseman that had Todd visit his girlfriend's parents (both Todd and his GF are asexual and not out to her parents), which depicted allosexuality from the perspective of asexuality as something nonsensical and Other, perhaps having something from Alastor's POV in which he's the observer of the rites of romance and/or sex in a way that shows their strangeness when one sits outside of their tenets

would kind of like to see him killing/hurting people for being pushy, either when alive or dead. I already see a lot of potentials for his past as a serial killer to be framed from an aroace POV, but I especially like this idea, similar to how Hannibal often targets people for being "rude."

more on what I was saying about aroaceness as a humanising trait -- more on how this affected him in life, how he feels about Vox's consistent obsessive behaviour, how it potentially makes it harder to imagine his place in a group setting like the hotel (which is rapidly being paired off into romantic couples -- often a nightmare scenario for aromantics), more on how potentially learning these words or something better to describe himself can make it possible for him to assert boundaries without shutting everyone out to a large extent, and also, tbh, to put Big Expectations onto a story that's barely even started, I hope that none of this takes away his less savoury traits necessarily. I hope he's still kind of an asshole, but simply that he is grounded in himself enough to be able to really believe in Charlie's work/aims and support her in them for more reasons than his own ends, and can admit to really caring for something

reiterating: I am interested in how his smile-as-mask will play into all of this

Any symbolism, metaphor, coding, and straight-up telling I've missed in the show itself? Any you'd want to see in upcoming seasons?

#alastor #aroace alastor #hazbin hotel #hazbin hotel meta #i keep saying *there's another analysis here* let's see if I ever do

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