#thank you so much for sending this. thats the first thing i wrote for my OCs in a while

[flamboyant-king]

you were one of the first blogs i ever followed and whenever I see one of your posts in my recommended I feel so happy. love your ocs !!!!

You--yoooouuu--*cries*

Thank you so much. I'm glad you stuck around so long and are enjoying what I'm currently trying to do. Back in the days of 2015-2016, my OC posts got like over a hundred notes, I posted em everyday, I was so gosh dang passionate about em. I even posted my character notes and answered questions about them. Super helped with development. Now, you see me once a month at least with an OC post. I still love them and I'm still eager on making their story, but gosh dang, life has changed so much since 2015, ya know. Even my OCs, I should share those notes lol.

Thank you once more. I'll give you a kiss on your hand. Mwah!

[hollowdeath]

professor potter

pairing: harry james potter x fem!reader AU (18+)

summary: 2 years after the war, harry accepted a position as a substitute professor at hogwarts and recognized you from his years as a student. old feelings come to the surface as you both try to remain professional to keep his position safe.

content warning: slight teacher/student dynamic (they used to be classmates, reader is 18+), mostly slow burn & angst. smut mostly doesn't happen til the end (masturbation, penetration)

word count: 12.5k

a/n: wrote this for fun between working on requests! thank you to everyone who sends them in, they're so good and i'm excited to post more soon! just another fluffy, angsty harry fic taking place in school w a hint of smut...kinda similar to my last one but thats ok ! as always not exactly book/movie/canon accurate i apologize !

it's your first day of your last year at hogwarts, and you're probably the only student here that's not completely thrilled to be back. young witches and wizards running around you in the halls with their robes dragging on the ground, completely in awe with each other at the architecture and moving portraits.

you have to admit, if hogwarts does anything right, it's the ambience. probably the only thing you'll miss after leaving this year is the magic castle itself, particularly the library and your dorm room, which have been your sanctuaries for the past 7 years. there's just no place in the world, even the wizarding world, you've found, that quite compares to hogwarts.

but no, unfortunately, not even the grandiose castle of every young wizard's dream was enough to make you want to stay here even a day longer than you had to. and trust, you were counting down the days.

there was a lot that went into your disdain for the school. after the war in your 5th year, nothing had been the same. sure, the building was restored to its original form and even had some upgrades installed, but the energy within the walls felt so…unsettling.

it had been more than 2 and half years since then, and most students who remember the war well had either graduated or moved on from it. you, however, continued to feel the effects of it every day.

you've had a lot of personal struggles since then mentally, which affects your social life. you've overheard your friends talking about how they don't feel like you're the same person and you inevitably bring them down. it wasn't long after that they stopped talking to you completely. you didn't bother to rekindle the connection; you were ready to leave this place behind anyways, what was the point in faking a friendship for another year?

even without all that, you truly just hated your classes. you actually used to be a scholar student in your day, consistently making the top of the headmaster's list every year until the war. and you still loved headmaster mcgonagall, of course, you don't think that'd ever change, it was mainly the other professors that gave you a hard time. once you showed signs of struggling and burn out, it was like they just completely gave up on you and moved on to the next eager, bright-eyed bushy-tailed 1st year to dote on.

no matter, because again, you were ready to leave for a variety of reasons. even if you had loved your professors and graduated at the top of the class, you still had no friends to celebrate with. and even if you had those so-called "friends" back in your life, you still felt completely alone with them.

and so you laid in bed, the same bed you've had for 7 years now, retracting the ornate trim on the ceiling like you have a million nights before.

you decided to look back at your schedule once more, floating the paper out of its folder in your bag and towards your open hand. you read through it slowly, but nothing had changed. pretty much the worst line up of classes you've had so far. particularly your least anticipated course, defense against the dark arts.

at this point, you'd had more than enough when it came to the dark arts. those death eaters nearly killed you in that war, and actually did manage to kill too many of your classmates and teachers in the process. you saw your second home crumble in front of you, classrooms you grew up in completely leveled and the bridge burned to the ground, so much death and destruction over nothing but power. you resented the dark magic in this world.

sighing, you set the paper down on your bedside table and roll over, attempting to fall asleep. you have plenty of early classes this year and don't look forward to having to wake up with the sun to make it to them on time.

you're wasting time in the bathroom just before your defense against the dark arts, your last class of the day, when your peace is interrupted by a group of girls who come in giggling and talking rapidly amongst each other. from inside your stall you can't help but tune into their gossip. it's the only thing you could hear and, who cares, you could use some good drama.

you tried to dissect their conversation but they were constantly talking over each other, squealing, giggling, and you couldn't understand a thing. after a few moments of craning your neck towards the door to get a better listen, one girl's voice stood out amongst the rest as she asked, "okay, but, who's going to try and flirt with potter first?" her question was followed by many desperate "me!" "me!" "me!"s, a wave of giggling following.

potter. there's no way…

the bells begin ringing, signaling your next class is starting soon, and the girls go rushing out of the bathroom together. you slowly open the stall door and walk to the closest mirror. pale, like you've seen a ghost.

they couldn't possibly be talking about harry potter, right?

just his name had become plenty famous in its own right. the boy who lived; the boy who lived twice. you hadn't heard his name mentioned in a long time, though that's not hard when you've hardly interacted with anyone here in a long time.

you remembered harry from your years before the war that you had shared with him. he was 2 years ahead of you, so it wasn't often you had the chance to speak with him, but he was pretty much as legendary as one student could be at hogwarts. however, whenever you did manage to have a conversation with him, you always thought he was cute. really cute.

okay, so maybe you had a ginormous crush on him your entire time at hogwarts. but so did pretty much every other girl. but you didn't just think he was cute, you admired his gentle nature and timid personality. despite his heroic and outright dangerous adventures, he was always so kind, so humble…

the bells begin ringing again, meaning you're now late to class. "shit." you mutter, grabbing your bag and stumbling through the bathroom door.

you're jogging to your dark arts class with a racing mind, still wondering why those girls would mention potter's name so randomly.

you turn the corner and see the classroom door is already closed. "shit." you mutter again, stomping your foot. now you have to open the heavy doors and draw everyone's attention towards you, quite literally the last thing in the world you want right now.

sighing, you push open one of the doors, making the loudest noises you've ever heard echo throughout the silent classroom. you walk in and, as expected, all eyes are on you.

you grit your teeth and close the door behind you, making your way towards an empty seat in the middle of the room. the silence lingers as your footsteps hit the ground, trying your best not to make eye contact with anyone. you hear a few snickers and whispers coming from behind, and you can already tell it's your old friend group. you roll your eyes, sighing as you drop your weight into the creaky wooden seat.

you hadn't realized, but headmaster mcgonagall was at the front of the room. you noticed once she continued talking, looking up to see her smiling at you. you returned it. you love how she's always liked you despite your grades slipping lately.

you quickly look back down at your hands as people begin to turn away from you, drawing their attention back to mcgonagall as she continues to introduce the class.

"like i was saying, class, we apologize for the change this semester and hope you'll be understanding of us as we navigate this situation carefully. i suspect you'll all be respectful and courteous to our guest as he donates his time to hogwarts and to you, our students."

you look back up, a confused look on your face. what change? what situation? what guest?

it didn't take you long to connect the dots. it's like everything was in slow motion. the girls talking in the bathroom, the guest, the reason all the front rows of seats in class were completely filled with girls…

"please, class, welcome hogwarts' very own, mr. harry james potter."

all at once, your eyes landed on harry, who had been sitting to the side, obscured from your vision by several girls and a pillar. as he walks towards mcgonagall, eager applause erupt from the girls and the boys offer mediocre claps. you're too stunned to react, watching harry intently as he shakes mcgonagall's hand with that same timid smile.

you can hardly believe your eyes. what is going on? why is he here? and how the hell does he look even better now than he did 2 years ago?

"thank you, headmaster mcgonagall," harry says shyly, turning to the students. his eyes immediately fall on you. you try to convince yourself he's looking just in front of you or even past you, but you can feel his stare into your eyes. its the only thing that breaks you out of your shock.

you blink a few times and slump into your seat, feeling your blood run cold at harry's eye contact. he looks down at the desk he's standing at and shuffles a few papers. you sink even lower into your chair. this can't be good.

"uh, well, hello…everyone," harry says awkwardly, earning some flirtatious giggles from the girls just ahead of you. "it's a pleasure to be here, really, despite the circumstances. uh, i'm sure as some of you know…i've been very close with the weasley family for years and feel devastated for bill– uh, professor weasley, that is," harry corrects himself nervously, clearing his throat and glancing at his papers again.

"and when he reached out to me personally, specifically me out of anyone, to teach in his place for this semester, i couldn't say no to him. so, while it's a real honor to be here with you all, please know it's just for this semester and then professor weasley will be back to continue with the lesson plan in the spring," harry explains, looking around the room yet always letting his eyes land on you specifically with a lingering gaze.

harry goes into the schedule for the semester, the skills you'll be learning, and, well, you can't really focus on what else because you're just completely lost in your own head.

harry potter, the harry potter, is your professor for an entire semester.

you were completely dumbfounded. he couldn't hardly be older than 20 years old at this point. he had only left hogwarts just 2 years prior, yet he looked so different. though the glasses and hair stayed relatively the same, he had matured in the face. a slight beard, defined smile lines, and he'd definitely spent some time in the gym…

seeing him in a button up with his old gryffindor tie on drove you mad. is he really getting you worked up in the middle of class by just standing there? you feel like you're 14 again, staring him down in the courtyard from behind a tree.

it doesn't help that you swear he keeps looking at you. specifically you. his gaze is unmistakable at this point, it can't be a coincidence.

you try to stop yourself from having these thoughts and physical reactions. if he's going to be your professor for an entire semester you have to get over this silly crush that was never going to work out anyway. though you're soon turning 19, it makes no difference if he's working with the school, it would never be allowed…

what are you even saying? as if anything would ever happen except in your dreams. all you're going to do is lust for him until christmas and then he'll be gone again, his name nothing but a spoken legend again.

before you can process all he's said, harry announces that everyone's free to leave once you grab a textbook from him. girls are immediately standing up and running to get in line, and the boys are rolling their eyes as they sluggishly follow behind.

you're inevitably the last one, getting a headache as you listen to girls try to ask harry all kinds of questions for a bit of his attention. he mostly just gives simple answers or laughs them off, referring back to the class or the textbook he was handing them in some way to change the subject.

mcgonagall eventually shoos the girls away, which harry thanks her for in a low tone. he hands a book to each of the boys in front of you before it comes down to you. as the boy in front of you is being escorted away by mcgonagall, you briefly catch harry putting the library card of your book inside the front cover before he closes it.

your eyes connect as he hands the book to you, but he doesn't let go. your heart instantly flutters.

"it's nice to see you again, [y/n]," he says softly, letting the weight of the book fall in your hands.

the way he says your name has you frozen in place. his pretty blue eyes have stayed just as mesmerizing. it takes a moment before you're able to wrap the book in your arms, offering him a friendly smile as you softly reply, "you too, harry…"

you're quickly making your way back to your room with the biggest, cheesiest smile plastered on your face. he remembered you. you had barely ever interacted with harry, only a handful of times as far as you could remember, and you were sure he had completely forgotten about you, or at least forgotten your name. you tried to chalk it up to him having access to the attendance records of the class and reading over your name, but you still felt like a giddy school girl skipping along day dreaming about her crush.

when you got back to your dorm, you set the class textbook down on your desk and went to turn around before looking back at it longingly. harry had just put the library card back in the book before handing it off to you. you were most likely crazy, but something inside you was insanely curious to see if he had done something to the card.

you slowly opened the book and took the card out, a blank piece of cardstock except for a fresh label printed at the top. you sigh, almost putting it back before seeing something on the card catch the shimmer of the light.

you give the card a curious look. you turn it in your hands towards the light, trying to see what's on it. before giving up in frustration, a thought comes into your brain.

no…

you dig into your luggage, still unpacked from the day prior, looking for your old ink and quill. once you find them you come back to the card, setting it on your desk as you open the ink pot. you dip your quill in the ink and touch it to the spot you noticed earlier.

as you watched, the ink collected into letters and numbers, forming a message across the dotted lines of the check out columns. you were stunned. harry actually wrote to you in disappearing ink? you thought you were delusional thinking it was a possibility, but here was the proof plain as day:

[y/n],

hagrid's, 8:30pm

harry

you kept rereading the lines over and over before they slowly disappeared, fading away into the paper. you stood back in pure disbelief. what does this mean? obviously it means he wants to meet with you, but for the life of you you just can't figure out why. you two barely knew one another personally, it had been two years since you'd seen or heard of each other again, and now he's secretly inviting you to hagrid's after hours using disappearing ink? as your substitute professor, too…

from 5-8 pm you mainly paced around your room in both lingering disbelief and unbridled excitement. though you had no idea why harry had invited you out in secret, you were anxious just to be in his presence at his request.

you spent forever deciding on your outfit, feeling a bit silly for putting so much effort into this suspicious rendezvous that you were still clueless about.

sneaking out had become somewhat natural to you over the years. you knew all the blind spots of the castle and could hear a prefect coming from a mile away. you were out of your room and walking down to hagrid's completely unnoticed in less than 10 minutes.

on your way down the hill, your mind is racing with possibilities of what this meeting could entail.

arriving at hagrid's hut, you admire the warm glow of the windows and intoxicating smell coming from the smoking chimney – a mix of wood and garlic. hagrid's pumpkins are just beginning to plump up, his yard scattered with overgrown vines.

as you walk up to the door, a wave of anxiety hits you. knocking seems like the most impossible task in the world all of a sudden.

you steady your breathing, let your heart rate slow, and knock before you have the chance to stop yourself.

a few seconds of some rustling can be heard behind the door before it swings open. harry greets you with a warm smile. no longer dressed for class, harry looks quite adorable in a comfy sweater and baggy jeans standing before you in the hut.

"[y/n], you got my message," he says, clearly impressed. you couldn't believe this was real. he really did leave you that note on purpose. just hearing him acknowledge it made your heart race all over again.

"i-i did," you say in shock, searching his expression for an answer to all your questions. why are you here?

harry gestures for you to come in. "well, join me, please," he insists. you politely smile and enter the hut, the smell of food making your mouth water immediately. "smells amazing in here," you comment under your breath.

harry closes the door, looking back at you with a shy smile. "oh, thank you. it's for us, actually." he tells you, nodding his head towards the dining table.

completely set up with a tablecloth, harry has food plated for the two of you on the tiny table, along with tea still steaming on the stove.

"if you don't mind, of course," he checks with you, his voice soft and unsure. you look back at harry, barely able to grasp what's happening before you reply, "of course,"

he suppresses a grin as he gestures to the table once more. "please," he prompts you. you hand him your bag and jacket before taking your seat at the table, admiring the food he prepared for you. you're still lost in thought when harry asks, "tea?" holding the kettle from the stove.

"please, thank you," you reply. he pours you both cups of tea before bringing them to the table with a smile on his face.

as you're eating you notice a record playing in the corner you hadn't heard earlier. it fills the space nicely as you both take your first bites of dinner. "hope you like it, i wasn't sure what to make," he says nervously.

wiping your lips with a napkin, you simply tell him, "it's lovely,"

after another moment or so, harry sits back in his chair. "so…[y/n]..." he sighs. hearing him say your name like that makes your brain fuzzy for just a second before he speaks again. "you're probably, um, wondering why…"

you stifle a laugh at his stalling, getting a hint of confidence as you interrupt him. "wondering why professor potter secretly invited me to have a home cooked dinner with him?"

harry goes still, his eyes searching your expression as a blush grows over his cheeks. he swallows nervously, blinking and shaking his head before attempting to respond. "u-um, yeah, that,"

smirking, enjoying his nerves, you wait for his explanation with your arms crossed and a raised brow. he clears his throat and diverts his eyes from your gaze. he takes a sip of tea before smacking his lips and looking back at you.

"i just, i haven't seen you…" he starts, eyes softening at you. "i-i know we didn't talk much, but…i always cared for you." the last part was hard for harry to get out, a weight lifting off his shoulders in the process.

you were blushing, but more than that you were sweating. this is like something you would dream about as a kid. hell, even just earlier today…

"when i saw you today…in class…" he seemed uncomfortable referencing that. "i just…a lot of memories came back to me," his hands move with him nervously as he speaks.

he sighs and stands up, his body language clearly stressed. you haven't said a word, you simply can't. what could you possibly say?

harry's facing the fireplace, his head in his hands. "look, i just, now that i'm your professor this semester i just think…" he takes a moment to find the words before turning to you. "i had a crush on you. okay? there. god damn it," harry huffs angrily, rolling his head back as he throws his hands down.

"i had a crush on you for like 3 years, it was stupid, and i don't want it to affect my teaching with you. so…i guess i practically set up a fucking date to tell you this, sent hagrid away for the evening for nothing…" he gestures to the table, sighing in defeat.

you're stunned into silence, to say the least. there aren't words to describe what's going on in your head at this moment.

after a moment harry looks back at you, his gaze softening once again. "[y/n]...please understand i wouldn't be telling you any of this unless i thought there was another way i could deal with it. when i saw you today…it was like i was 16 again," a small smile creeps onto his face before he wipes it away.

"and if i didn't tell you now, it's all i would've thought about when i saw you, so…yeah. there." harry says with a huff, avoiding eye contact with you.

before you can even process what's going on, your body reacts for you. you stand up, walking over to harry, getting his attention off the floor. he looks at you almost with fear in his eyes at how close you are. you sigh shakily before speaking.

"harry…u-um, professor potter…" you correct yourself. "please, just, harry…for now at least," harry insisted, his eyes apologetic.

"harry…" you say, suppressing a grin. "you don't have to worry. really…um, it was definitely mutual, to put it lightly…"

harry gives you a surprised look. "really?"

you roll your eyes, taking a step away from him and towards the fire, enjoying the warmth. "harry, you forget who you are sometimes. essentially every girl i knew had a crush on you at one point."

harry's a little flustered at this statement, also taking a step closer to the fire, and towards you. "i-i wouldn't say that, i was definitely not that lucky back in the day," he jokes.

"so those girls that were practically all over you during class today…?" you tease him. "'oh, professor potter, what can i do to get a good grade?'" you mock their voices, giving him puppy dog eyes as you lean towards him before laughing and turning towards the fire. "is that not luck?" you ask with your arms crossed, a smirk hiding your slight jealousy.

harry's silent for a few moments before you look over at him. you see his eyes dark and fixated on you for just a second before he blinks and shakes his head at you, also turning to the fire. "please. they're children. they crush on any slightly older guy they see."

you roll your eyes again at his denial. "some of them were my age, well on their way to being 19. but, whatever you say."

the fire crackles in front of you two, filling the space and creating a warm glow. "besides…none of them are you." harry says. you look over at him, and he's lost staring at the fire. he feels you looking at him and quickly corrects himself. "i mean, nobody was like you, at least to me, back then…" he trails off awkwardly, wincing at his own choice of words.

you adore his nervous antics. he's just the same sweet, timid boy you remember, except he's a bit taller with a 5 o'clock shadow and looks gorgeous in the glow of a fireplace right now.

"i've really mucked this night up, haven't i? i was supposed to tell you about the crush calmly and professionally, with no inappropriate comments, and send you on your way into the night with your first reading in the textbook…" harry sighs, giving you a pathetic look.

"well…" you start. "your first mistake was probably leaving me a secret note, and cooking me a wonderful dinner," you gesture towards the table. harry lets out a pathetic laugh, shaking his head. "yeah, probably."

you don't know why you feel the need to, but you instinctively grab for harry's hand. he gives you a surprised, scared look.

you try to reassure him with a soft smile. "harry, i appreciate you telling me. i hope it can make this semester easier for you."

harry smiles in return, but it's not genuine. he looks like he's holding back from letting you know how he really feels.

regardless, he invited you two to finish up your food, laughing as you both attempted to resume casual conversation without the awkward air.

surprisingly, the two of you naturally begin to talk up a storm, reminiscing on memories and catching up on what's happened since then. harry tells you about his career as an auror and his experiences that lead him to being able to teach defense against the dark arts. when professor weasley's wife had died of sudden illness, the only person he wanted to take his place was harry.

you're hesitant to tell him about your lack of eventful news, practically hiding your face in embarrassment as you admit that your grades have been suffering since the war.

harry put a reassuring hand on your knee, his chair pushed closer to you. you had both long since finished dinner and just talked, enjoying the fire as harry continued to feed it wood every so often.

you looked up at him, melting at how adorable his tired eyes looked through his glasses. "i get it. trust me." he tells you. his voice puts you at ease, and you don't feel quite as embarrassed as before.

"maybe this semester i could help you. if you'd like, of course," harry offers. you smile. "of course."

as you're slowly making your way towards the door to leave, harry watches you search through your bag to find chapstick. as you're putting it on, he continues to watch you. you sneak a glance at him, his face soft and full of admiration.

"you know, if i may say, in the least inappropriate manner possible…" he says with a laugh, causing you to laugh with him. "you have truly only gotten more beautiful after all this time, [y/n]."

looking over at him, you can feel your face form a cheesy grin with blushing cheeks. "well, thank you, that's very kind," you say, putting your chapstick away and taking another step towards the door. "but, really, i should be saying the same about you."

harry waves you away, but you notice the smile planted on his cheeks. "please," he says sarcastically.

he reaches for the door to open it for you, and finds himself rather close to you by accident. you smile up at him, and he nervously steps back.

"u-uh, thank you for coming tonight, really, even if it was a bit weird…" harry says, an embarrassed laugh following. giggling with him, you take a step outside. "it was nice. but, no more invisible ink. just ask me from now on, okay?" you ask, still giggling at him.

harry shakes his head at himself. "will do."

you give him a warm smile before reaching in for a one-arm hug, resting your head on harry's shoulder for just a second before pulling back. "i'll see you tomorrow, professor potter." 

enjoying the shocked and flustered look on his face, you walk away still laughing, making your way up the hill and towards the castle. you heard the door shut behind you quickly after you left, but could feel harry's lingering eyes following you through the window the entire way back.

that night you're laying in bed trying to convince yourself everything that just happened wasn't a dream. if it weren't for your full stomach and muddy shoes sitting by your door you might've convinced yourself it really was all an illusion. rather than dreading the next day of classes, you're actually excited to wake up as it only means you'll see harry sooner.

though you're not sure exactly why. yes you'd had a friendly conversation with him tonight after he admitted his feelings towards you, which still hasn't quite settled in yet…but what happens now? he's still your professor for the next 5 months minimum, and you both know you used to like each other. harry might feel better getting it off his chest, but you were perfectly fine keeping that secret to yourself like you always had. if anything, now it's the only thing you're going to think about every day.

rolling over, you try to fall asleep without thinking about harry too much.

it had been a few weeks since you met with harry that night in hagrid's hut, and things were going…okay, so far.

well, to be completely honest, you had utterly fallen back into your crush on harry harder than you ever had before.

and you tried to stop yourself this time. really, you did. working with harry in class and then stopping by his office at least 3 times a week for his help in other classes was a lot of time to be spending with a professor, and you rather despised just how fast harry made your heart beat or how easily his eyes could distract you.

so you tried your best to convince yourself it was lingering feelings from your past self, even trying to have a crush on other boys in your year to distract your brain. that failed miserably. none of those boys were attractive or interesting on their own, especially in comparison to professor potter…

but you couldn't fool yourself. you still felt the same butterflies seeing harry now like you did in 5th year. when he's talking to you in the quiet of his office, reading your textbook to you, you feel like the only two people in the world. when he fixes your hands to hold the wand properly, or moves your arm for you in the correct pattern to cast a spell, you can't focus for the rest of class. if his eyes linger on you just a bit too long during one of his lectures, a knowing smile growing on his face, you melt in your seat.

there was no denying it. you liked him more now than you ever had before. maybe it's just the sheer amount of time you've spent with him this past month or so, but your feelings for him had never been this strong in the past. there were days where he was quite literally the only thing you thought about, or at least wanted to think about. though you were doing better in your other classes, it was only because of him. you spent barely any outside time putting effort into these classes because, ultimately, you were completely distracted by harry.

and not just the idea of him, but particularly the growing tension you had noticed between you two recently.

you also tried to convince yourself that this was going on in your head. but there were just too many instances of prolonged eye contact, harry sitting a bit too close to you during your tutoring sessions, and lingering hands on your skin that made you question if harry maybe wasn't entirely over his crush either…

not that you tried to make it easy for him. since the semester started, you've been taking some extra time each morning to perfect your hair/makeup, put on your favorite perfumes on days you knew you'd be close to harry, and would even change your outfit completely when going to study with him outside of your school robes to give you a boost of confidence.

not that you needed the boost. lately you could only feel confident in yourself and nothing less. something about learning your life long crush who seemed so unattainable also had feelings for you, and could possibly still, made you feel untouchable. not to mention that any girl you heard talk about him or swoon over him in class just made you laugh to yourself; they had no idea you were with him alone for hours every week goofing off together as he attempted to help you study.

this confidence made its way into other parts of your day outside of harry as well. you were talking more in class, making a few new friends, even going to parties and outings just for the fun of it. you were actually enjoying your time at hogwarts instead of dreading every day. not all because of harry, but it definitely didn't hurt to consider him a friend.

a friend. a professor. an old classmate. a crush. a temporary fixation. your relationship to harry, in your mind, seemed so complicated and sometimes incredibly frustrating. especially when he seemed to flirt with you so subtly. you couldn't stand the, 'is he, isn't he' thoughts. but, at the same time, it just made you more motivated to push the limits to see how he responded.

of course it started with looking good, enjoying his reaction seeing you each day with a small smile and blushing cheeks. then it was making flirtatious jokes and purposefully giving him innocent looks while he rambled about whatever subject to get him flustered and distracted. and, lately, you've stepped it up by wearing shorter and shorter skirts whenever you stop by his office, and have even caught him looking at your legs a number of times when he thinks you're not paying attention.

all this to say, there was definitely tension.

you had to admit you felt a bit guilty, you knew harry valued his position as a substitute professor and was enjoying his time there, and you would feel awful if anything ever happened to cost him this position. he told you about his crush specifically to alleviate it, and your only goal this semester has been to do the opposite.

but, at the same time, you wouldn't act this way if harry didn't also create tension between you two. he also made overtly flirty jokes and comments, even seeming a tad bit jealous whenever you mentioned another boy during your time together. and you weren't stupid, you could tell when he wore the cologne you complimented one time when you were around or had even changed from his school clothes before you came to see him. there was definitely something unspoken going on between the two of you, but you were both afraid of crossing that line and making things complicated. besides, if anything, you both seemed to enjoy this game you were playing of teasing each other in private and then acting normally during class as student and teacher.

honestly, you found it to be insanely erotic, and were more turned on in class than any other time you were with harry due to the secretive nature of everything. his longing gaze as you walk in, his nervous glances towards specifically you, the shift in his voice from talking to one student to talking to you, it was all so subtle yet in plain view. something about wanting what you can't have only made you want it more.

on this particular day, you had been with harry for over two hours studying for an exam for a class you had been struggling with all semester, even with harry's help. you were frustrated, laying your head in your arms with your textbook in front of you, groaning as harry chuckled at you. 

"c'mon, [y/n], you've got this. i mean, you did just fine on this last practice test, better than you have all semester really," harry comments, pulling the paper out of your folder. you lift your head up, giving him a mean look. "i got a 75. barely." you deadpan.

"yes, and that's better than what you have been getting." harry stated, trying to hide a smirk. you throw a crumpled up paper at him. "stop, that's not funny," you whine, also trying to hide your laugh.

chuckling, harry stands up and walks towards the bookshelf in his office. "look, i'm just trying to be encouraging here," he says over his shoulder as he scans the rows of books.

you try to get back to your work, but you're just so utterly confused and upset that you close the book with a huff and lean back in your seat with an exasperated expression. harry hears this and turns to you, giving you a sympathetic smile.

he walks back over, picking up the book in front of you and setting it in your bag. "here, we can be done for today. it's not good to push yourself past your limit."

you sigh as you push back the urge to tear up. "sometimes i just feel so stupid," you say in a soft, despondent voice, staring off into the window across from harry's desk.

harry's watching you intently, and nearly drops to his knees as he crouches beside your chair and catches your eyes in his. "hey, you're not stupid. quite the opposite, actually." he says with a genuine voice. you look away, still not believing him.

"really, [y/n], and i'm not saying this as your professor. back in school i was constantly listening to hermione go on and on about your intelligence and class rank. she was incredibly impressed and slightly envious that someone 2 years below her was actually providing some competition at this school." harry says with a laugh.

you can't help but blush like crazy at this confession. hermione had been your academic inspiration for all of your time at hogwarts, and even still now despite your declining lack of effort. you'd had quite a few conversations with her in the past about classes and certain books or authors you both enjoyed, but had no idea she thought that highly of you.

mulling over this information in your head, harry continued to grab your attention with a soft smile and loving eyes. "you're not stupid. different things are harder for different people. you'll get there, and i'll help you. okay?" he asks.

you smile back at him. "okay."

slowly packing up to leave, you and harry both take your time to gather your supplies as you chat about your respective plans for the weekend. you casually mention a party you were thinking of going to. harry perks up at this. "a party?" he asks, a twinge of concern laced in his voice.

you give him a look. "yeah, ever heard of it?" you ask sarcastically, laughing to yourself. "i guess it's one of the slytherin boys' birthdays, or something like that," you wave off, throwing your bag over your shoulder. "apparently it's going to be massive,"

harry continues looking at you with a hint of concern. "well, just…be safe, yeah?" harry comments, his voice uneasy. you laugh at him again, looking at him incredulously. "yes, professor potter, i'll be careful," you tease him. you know harry gets a little squirmy when you call him that outside of class, and it never fails to make you feel powerful.

"besides, i heard the theme is dress to impress, so you already know i'm gonna look so good," you joke, flipping your hair dramatically. harry's tenseness breaks, letting out a chuckle. "well, still. just…be safe." is all he manages to say as you walk with him to the door.

saying your goodbyes as you separate down the hall, you can still feel harry's eyes on you until you disappear around the corner.

the night of the party, you were still unsure if you wanted to go. when a couple girls from class saw you and asked if you were going, they ended up convincing you to come with them. so, you got changed into a flashy dress that fit you well, fixed up your hair and makeup a bit, and met them in the courtyard to walk to the slytherin common room together. they obsessively commented on your outfit, telling you just how good you looked and letting you know you'd have no problem finding a guy to snog tonight.

but, you don't want any guy tonight. if anything, you were walking slowly through the hallways hoping by some chance that harry would cross your path and see just how good you looked. but you knew you weren't that lucky.

upon arriving at the party, drinks are immediately pushed into your and your friends' hands. they were right about the party being massive, as every square foot of the slytherin common room was packed with slightly tipsy students of all ages dancing to the loud music. you had barely finished your first drink before your friends dragged you over to do shots with them, wincing at the burn it left in your throat afterwards.

as the night goes on, you're eventually separated from all the girls you came with. not on purpose, some of them were playing drinking games, some were dancing, and one had even left the party with a guy she was completely into. no hard feelings, everyone was just doing their own thing. you had a few shouting-over-the-music conversations with a couple classmates and drank another cup of the mysterious alcoholic punch being served before deciding to head back to your room. you informed one of your friends, who asked if you wanted her to come with you, but you insisted she stay.

entering the hallway is extremely sobering. the loud music and colorful lights made it easy to ignore the growing drunken sensation, but you were now nervously navigating the halls of hogwarts, slightly intoxicated, attempting to warm yourself up with your hands over your arms. you hadn't even thought to bring a jacket, of course, so you were shivering as you made your way back to your room.

not long after leaving the party, you turn the corner and come face to face with another person. a boy a year under you, though you couldn't remember his name or anything else about him. you're a bit startled, not expecting to see anyone else, but politely apologize and attempt to walk around him.

"hey. you were at the party, right?" he asks, stepping in front of you to prevent you from leaving. you're slightly annoyed by him already, but your intoxicated state makes you bite your tongue. "yeah, just on my way back to my room," you try to end the conversation there, taking another step to get around him.

but he gets in your way again, stepping even closer to you this time. "what's the rush? y'know you had every guy talkin' in there tonight? sure would be nice to take home the prize," he slurs into your face, your nose scrunching at his alcoholic breath. god, this kid's way more wasted than you.

"excuse me?" you scoff, turning your face away from him. he tries to put his hand on your waist but you slap it away as hard as you can, causing him to wince and give you an angry look. "i suggest you leave me the fuck alone," you announce firmly, stancing your feet apart as you get ready to defend yourself further.

just as this guy's about to try again, this time his hands going for your neck, a voice from down the hall echoes loudly, scaring you both. "hey!"

you both turn, and it's harry.

"i would further suggest you leave her alone, mr. williams," he announces as he swiftly walks towards you. the kid laughs him off. "mind your business, huh, potter? this doesn't involve you," he continues to slur, looking like he wants to fight as harry walks up to him, chest to chest.

"it does now. leave and you'll be lucky i don't have you expelled or rather arrested for sexually assaulting a fellow student on campus grounds after hours, while intoxicated might i add," harry spits at him, his eyes full of disgust and rage.

the kid falters a bit, but the alcohol still has him acting cocky, getting in harry's face. "yeah? or what," he asks daringly.

you get between them and put your wand, hidden in your dress, against the kid's throat, making him stiff with wide eyes. "touch him and i will gladly get expelled for hurting you in ways you couldn't even conceive of in your fucking nightmares. do you understand? get the fuck out of here!" you nearly shout at the kid, causing him to turn and run.

you sigh a breath of relief, but quickly begin to feel the anxiety return as you bring your wand down and look at harry.

you can feel your body shaking with anger and fear, and also shivering from how cold you hadn't realized you'd gotten. your cheeks were flushed, your breathing uneven, and nearly on the verge of tears. harry's eyes were still angry, but he gave you a sympathetic look. he promptly took off his jacket and wrapped it around your shivering frame, enveloping you in a hug in the process. it's hard not to let the tears flow just a bit as you rest your head in his chest. you felt so vulnerable with him in that moment.

"here, let's get you back to your room, yeah?" harry says softly, turning your shoulders and guiding you down the hall. you realize you had sobered up during the ordeal, your eyes focusing and walking straightening out as you follow the corridors. once harry begins guiding you down your hallway, you slow to look up at him with a curious expression.

"how do you know where my room is?"

harry's a bit stunned by your question, searching for an answer before you began to think more. "and, wait," you stop walking and turn to him. "how did you even find me?" you ask breathlessly. harry continues to look guilty as he searches for an answer. smirking, you pull his jacket on you closer.

"professor potter, if i didn't know better, i'd say you were watching me tonight," you tease him in a flirty voice. "surely that's not the case, is it?"

harry looks around you two nervously, clearly starting to feel anxious for his actions. all you could do was smirk. you knew he still liked you.

harry sighs, avoiding your eye contact with a completely red face. "look, i just had a bad feeling about that party, okay?" he says simply. you continue to stare at him with a knowing look. "i couldn't sleep tonight knowing something could've happened to you. something like that fucking kid…" harry gets worked up just thinking about it again before stopping himself and calming down. "i'm sorry. it was wrong of me, and completely inappropriate."

your smirk drops into a soft smile. you can't help but feel your stomach erupt into butterflies hearing him admit he was watching you tonight specifically to make sure you were safe.

you softly put your hand to his cheek, causing him to look at you. he looks apologetic, concerned, and sad, his eyes searching yours as he slightly leans into your touch.

"thank you, harry." you say just above a whisper, your voice genuine and loving.

he sighs again, a bit relieved, a bit sad. his hand goes for yours, holding it for just a moment before he gives it back to you, letting go as he looks towards your door.

"well," he starts off, his voice cracking. "i'll leave you here for the night,"

smiling, you nod and take a step towards your door. you slip his jacket off of you and hand it back to him with a grateful, warm smile. he returns the smile as you're opening your door and waving goodbye at him.

as you're getting ready for bed, you replay the events of tonight over and over. you imagine harry watching you leave your room without you having any clue, meeting up with your friends, leaving the party in a daze, attempting to escape that guy before harry decided he had to step in and protect you.

you felt a bit silly for ever thinking harry's crush on you had stopped. even his subtle clues weren't very subtle thinking back now. maybe back in year 5 you assumed you were crazy for thinking he was looking at you funny, but now, nearing 3 years later, and learning he's liked you the whole time, you couldn't deny his longing gaze.

laying in bed, you decided you had to properly thank harry in some way for tonight, and you knew exactly how.

the next day, you paid a special visit to diagon alley with a friend to buy something special for harry. when she asked why you would ever possibly buy something like that for yourself, you make up some story about needing it for a class. she doesn't believe you, but goes along with it anyway and continues to have fun with you on your sunday out shopping.

you head towards his office in the afternoon when he usually spends his time grading assignments and working on the following week's lesson plan. you practically had his schedule memorized after coming to study with him so often.

softly knocking on the door, harry lets out a, "come in,"

you enter the office and he smiles at you immediately before it falters, his eyes then landing on the wrapped box in your hands. "surprise," you say with a shy voice.

he lets out a huff, looking back at you with a disbelieving expression. "[y/n]..." he carries off.

"it's just a little something," you say as you walk towards his desk, setting it down carefully in front of him. "a thank you, for last night," you tell him.

his eyes move back and forth from the box to your eyes, not knowing what to say. a few moments pass before he stands. "[y/n], i can't accept this…" he sighs. "what i did last night, i mean…it shouldn't have happened that way," he says curtly.

you tilt your head to catch his gaze, giving him a warm smile. "you did nothing wrong," you reassure him. you gesture to the gift. "please," you insist.

harry's shoulders relax, giving you an embarrassed smile as he slides the box closer to him, admiring the wrapping. "this is gorgeous, did you do this?" he asks, pointing at the sparkly ribbon and personalized name card. you proudly smile and nod your head.

harry admires it for another moment before carefully untying the ribbon and lifting the lid off the box. he gasps at what he sees.

a signed, hardcover, gold leaf detailed first edition defense against the dark arts textbook from his favorite auror. he had talked to you about seeing it at the bookshop but not wanting to spend the money or not having the place to display it or whatever his excuse was. you had taken note of this comment and when you saw it wasn't as expensive as harry had made it seem you knew it was perfect.

"[y/n]...you didn't…" he utters, practically falling back in his chair as he continues to stare at the cover. you giggle fondly at his reaction. "go ahead, open it up," you tell him excitedly. he can hardly move, but he eventually takes the book out of the box and admires it in his hands. he flips the cover open, sees the signature, and smiles. then, he looks at the inside of the cover and his expression drops.

"i had it personalized, if that's okay with you," you ask anxiously. on the inside of the leather bound cover you had a pressing engraved that said 'harry james potter'.

harry's in shock, his fingers running across the pressing softly. "[y/n], this is…" he trails off, continuing to admire the book as he flips through it, landing back on the inside cover, admiring his name once more.

"thank you." harry says, looking at you with so much love in his eyes it makes your heart burst. it was worth every penny seeing him in awe in front of you like this.

"well, thank you," you respond, smiling, holding your arms behind your back.

harry abruptly stands up, stepping around his desk and pulling you in for a desperate hug. you're a bit surprised, your arms wrapping around his waist as he continues to pull you closer and closer.

after a minute or so of the most comforting hug you've experienced outside of last night in that hallway, harry separates from you only slightly to look down at you. your faces are close enough to feel the breath of the other person.

you just want to tell him, 'fuck it, who cares, nobody's here, just kiss me, please, release this tension', but before you can even consider it, harry breaks the silence.

"i still love you," he says so softly, his face wincing as the words fall from his lips. your breath hitches. love?

"fuck," harry mutters, almost stepping away from you until you pull him closer to you, putting your lips close enough to his they're nearly touching. "please. kiss me. just kiss me. please." you practically beg, your hand finding its way to harry's neck.

"[y/n], we can't, i can't–" "just once, please, maybe it'll stop if we just, please…" you interrupt him, hoping he understands what you're implying, your noses rubbing together.

harry takes a few moments before practically whimpering as he connects your lips to his, wrapping you in his arms tightly. you immediately melt into him, letting the kiss consume you as your hands pull harry closer to you.

it only takes a few seconds before harry has you up on his desk, his hands gripping your ass under your skirt. the cold of the wood on your exposed skin makes you gasp, and harry's tongue quickly slips past your lips.

it's everything you imagined, and the fact that this is happening in his office is just making you even more turned on. you had played this scenario in your head so many times, and it hardly felt real once it was actually happening. and on the desk you spent so many hours at, pining over him and fantasizing him taking you like he is right now.

after a few minutes of making out and needy groping through your clothes, harry pulls away breathlessly. opening your eyes you see he's completely flushed, his hair slightly messy as he nervously takes his hands off you.

you awkwardly clear your throat, your hands falling to your sides and resting back on the desk. harry takes a step away, straightening his tie and fixing his hair. you hop off his desk and adjust your skirt.

the silence between you is awkward, but there's just nothing to say. the kiss only left you wanting more, of course, it was pointless to ever hope it would quell your feelings in some way.

"well," harry begins, his voice shaky and quiet. "that didn't work."

you let out a nervous laugh, coughing to cover it up. "yeah…sorry." you mumble.

harry sighs. "no, i'm sorry. i'm technically your superior, i shouldn't be doing this to you. leading you on, flirting with you, for fuck's sake, following you around after hours…"

you shake your head. "look, i'm not kissing professor potter, okay? i like you, harry. i've liked you since i was 13. i don't want to ruin your position here either, and i'll stop if that's what you truly want…" you choke up just a bit before swallowing it back. "but, just, please, stop blaming yourself. i want this, too."

the silence returns, harry clearly thinking over what you said as his eyes stare off beside you. you're anxiously shifting your weight, watching his face get lost in his own thoughts.

"i can't risk this job," harry says finally. "i don't give a shit about the money, pay me everything in the world i would still want you…" he mumbles. you feel your stomach drop at this sentiment. you want him so, so badly. but… 

"but…" harry says.

you smile at him sadly, knowing what's coming. "i can't let down bill, or mcgonagall, or any professors or students here who may actually still like me," he says with a dry laugh. "if we ever got caught, and i just know we would, and what would happen to you…i just–" "i know, harry," you interrupt him, taking a small step towards him.

he smiles at you sadly as well. "and i agree. it's not worth it. well, you're worth it, of course…" you say shyly, diverting your gaze before continuing. "but, it's too risky. you deserve to finish out this semester without that hanging over your head, y'know?"

harry stares at you lovingly, no attempt to hide his adoration for you in this moment. "you're truly incredible. you know that?" harry comments softly.

you respond by blushing and crossing your arms. he hums softly, his smile taking over his cheeks. "thank you, really, for everything, if things were any different, i wish…" harry stumbles. you smile at him again. "i know."

harry returns to his gift, admiring the book in his hands over and over before putting it on the bookshelf next to his desk. he admires it there for a while as well before thanking you again.

as you're getting ready to leave, harry stops you for a moment. "if you don't mind, i'd still love to help you in your other classes. and, just, remain friendly in general still, if possible…"

you melt again at his soft demeanor. harry's such a sweetheart it's heartbreaking. all you want is to kiss him again. it's all you've wanted since he stopped.

"of course."

it's the end of the semester, and you have mixed feelings about it. on one hand you're dying for a break from classes. you've done the best you have in years this semester, and it's exhausted you. but you're incredibly grateful, for a lot of things. your new friends, your rediscovered love for hogwarts and magic in general, your overall improved attitude and mentality.

with special thanks to a certain substitute professor…

harry. this semester was definitely a rollercoaster for you when it came to harry. though, towards the end, things fell into place a bit more as you both accepted and embraced your odd, yet effective routine. professional student-professor relationship in public; smitten, teasingly love-sick old classmates in the comfort of his office walls. nothing further than lingering hands, loving stares, and the occasional compliment towing the line of what's inappropriate and what isn't.

though the dynamic wasn't ideal, you grew to love it for what it was. a simple, longing love that wasn't exactly unspoken anymore, but sure felt like it each passing day as you both pretended that kiss never happened.

that kiss. you swear you think about it every day. you long for harry to grab you like that again, to slip his tongue past your lips again…sometimes, late at night, it's all you can think about. sometimes just the thought of it makes you need to touch yourself, remembering how desperate he was for you, the feeling of his lips on yours, sitting on his desk in his office, just the image of it from outside of your own perspective could bring you to your orgasm alone in your room.

to say you were anxiously counting down the days until classes were over and harry technically wasn't employed with hogwarts anymore was an understatement. though you hadn't spoken about it with him, you felt it was okay to maybe consider that he would want to continue things further with you once his substitution was over. you kept your guard up as you knew he could still be uncomfortable with it while you were a student in general. but a large portion of you was practically praying that wasn't the case. you physically couldn't resist him much longer.

you were staying on campus for christmas this year, mostly just to savor your last holiday here, but also to continue seeing harry if possible.

it was the last day of classes, and you learned you passed all your exams with flying colors. you showed up to dark arts class early to inform harry excitedly, and he congratulated you with the same level of excitement.

"i knew you could do it! i told you you were smart." he beams. "i am so, so proud of you, [y/n]."

you want to hug him so badly, he's helped you so much this semester, you wouldn't have cared enough to try and get these kinds of grades without his guidance. but it's too public, and the risk is too high, so you just settle on an awkward high five and laugh emptily.

as other students walk in, you both pretend the moment never happened, and you sit in your seat without looking up from the floor.

the class is simple and rather uneventful as it's mostly everyone's last class of the semester. harry actually hands out christmas cookies hagrid made for everyone, and they're mediocre in taste, but the designs are so adorable you can't resist finishing it.

harry gives you all a speech thanking the class for trusting him to teach this semester, and for being respectful of him and professor weasley's lessons. he talks about how he's always thought about being a professor, but actually ended up despising the paperwork, and just missed his old job, which caused the class to chuckle with him.

he dismissed everyone with a happy christmas, specifically towards you, of course.

your heart aches a little as you leave the classroom and head to your room. you're going to miss harry as a professor, even if it caused complications in other aspects, it was inspiring to see him be so intelligent, helpful, and supportive in class. of course you were biased, you always found him to be amazing, but something about watching him teach a young wizard how to do a spell correctly for the first time just made you admire him so deeply.

you decided to rest for the night, knowing harry would be here for at least another day to collect all his items and clean the classroom up for professor weasley. you could talk to him then, what exactly about you weren't sure just yet, but you knew you had to tie up these loose ends before they drove you mad.

the next afternoon, you're practically one of the only students roaming the halls. most everyone leaves the first day of break to go home, and by christmas there's only a handful of students left.

arriving at harry's office door, you admire it one last time. your little sanctuary away from the world.

you knock, but to your dismay, there's no answer.

you knock again, a bit louder, but still, nothing. you decide to peak in, and notice how barren the desk looks from afar.

fuck. there's no way harry's left without speaking to you first.

you quickly walk to the dark arts classroom just down the hall, hoping he's cleaning and organizing it, but find it empty and dark. your heart sinks. he's gone.

you slowly walk back to your room, deciding you'll grab your coat and visit hagrid to see if harry's with him there. you try not to let your disappointment overcome you, there's still a chance you could talk to him…

entering your room, you immediately head for your coat rack by the window. you start to slip it on when you hear your door close, knowing you left it open on purpose to quickly leave.

you turn around, and it's harry.

you gasp, immediately dropping the coat and running to him, jumping into a hug. he laughs at your reaction, but embraces you nonetheless.

"hi, love," he says softly, resting his head on top of yours. you could hardly contain yourself at the pet name. it communicated so much to you with so little effort.

you look up at him, barely able to believe what's happening. harry looks at you knowingly. this unspoken tension. it was going to be the death of you.

as harry begins leaning in, you crash your lips together with his, immediately engulfing him into a heated, wanting, needing kiss.

harry's more than happy to give in to you. it's clear he's thought about this just as much as you have. he finished all his professor duties as soon as he could so he could officially, finally, be yours.

you guide harry to your bed, pushing him onto it as he gives you an impressed look, clearly intrigued by your repressed desperation.

you crawl onto his lap, immediately pulling him back into the kiss. harry's hands are all over you, finally, after fantasizing about it every night in this very same bed for months.

the kiss is desperate, full of moaning and getting sloppier by the minute. harry's squeezing and slapping your ass so hard you whimper in his arms, your hands gripping his button up tightly.

"fuck, [y/n], need you so bad, please," harry moans into your kiss, his hands sliding up your back. you reach to take your shirt off, left in just a bra and tiny skirt, as you start untying his tie and unbuttoning his shirt.

harry's staring at you with hunger in his eyes. "do you even understand how badly i've wanted you? you and these fucking skirts, you must think i'm stupid." he growls, pulling at the hem of your skirt. you blush and stifle a giggle, overwhelmed with how insanely hot you found this to be.

"think that's funny? you think it was funny when i had to stand in class all day and not stare at your perfect legs through your robe? anytime i gave a lecture and just looking at you turned you into a needy slut," harry grabs your hair, turning your attention to him as he unbuttons the rest of his shirt with his other hand. "was that fun for you, hm? did you enjoy teasing me all semester?"

you can't say anything. all you can do is nod. you were so turned on you could hardly think straight.

"i bet it was," he says, examining your desperate expression, his words dripping with desire.

he pulls you in for another kiss, and you help him take off his shirt. his skin was warm, soft, and his shoulders were broad. you moved your lips to his neck, leaving an obvious bite just below his collar to finally mark what was yours.

harry groans, his hands reaching behind your back to swiftly undo your bra. he helps pull it off of you, marveling at your chest. "beautiful," he tells you before attaching his lips to your skin. you hold his head against you, savoring the feeling and sight of harry leaving hickeys along the soft skin of your boobs.

his hand cups one softly as his tongue circles your nipple, watching you through his glasses as you melt into his hands. "harry…" you moan, your hand running through his soft hair.

he continues, starting to suck on your nipple softly with closed eyes, his other hand pulling up your skirt to feel your wetness through your panties.

you immediately whimper and lean into harry's touch, desperate for this for so long. "f-fuck," you stutter breathlessly.

harry smiles, taking his lips off of you to look up at your blushing face. "so wet already," he smirks.

you cover his face with your hands, embarrassed, giggling, continuing to further lean into his hand for pleasure.

he laughs and removes your hands, his eyes full of lust just looking at you in his lap.

"i need you, now," he insists, pushing you further onto his growing erection through his slacks. you let out a breathy moan feeling just how hard he is already. he's just as desperate as you've been for him.

"is that okay?" he asks carefully, watching for your reaction. you laugh a bit. "please. i've waited long enough." you joke.

you help harry take his pants and boxers off, as well as your skirt and panties, leaving you both naked in your room.

he sat back down on the bed, and invited you into his lap again. "just like this is perfect," he says, guiding your hips and admiring your body as you sit with his cock between you two, your eyes barely able to look away from it.

harry pulls you in for a kiss, his hands traveling over your body and stopping at your pussy again, his hand feeling just how wet you are. he moans into your kiss along with you and begins to slip his fingers inside of you, slowly, letting you react to him.

harry pushes further and further into you until you're practically riding his hand, your kiss barely kept together with you bouncing, desperate for more. "please," you insist, your hand gently grasping for his precum soaked cock.

harry smiles, gently pulling his fingers away before letting you guide yourself onto him. slowly at first, you enjoy the feeling of harry's cock stretching you open, whimpering as he watches you intently, his hands supporting your hips. eventually you feel yourself take him completely, your hips flush with his as you start to slowly grind your hips up and down.

harry's a mess, barely able to hold himself together just watching you adjust to his cock. your face twisting in pleasure, your soft whimpers, the tight feeling of your pussy squeezing around him, it was almost too much already.

"fuck, baby," harry's moaning, his hands gripping your hips for sanity. you can't help but giggle, you just love seeing him like this for you after dreaming about it for so long. he's so lost in pleasure already, his jaw slack and eyes dropping.

"i-i'm already, fuck [y/n], you're just so," harry can barely get the words out. hearing him moan your name so filthily motivated you to move your hips quicker, letting your tits bounce in his face as you continued to pick up speed.

"fuck, fuck, fuck," harry's panicking, you can tell he's already trying to hold back his orgasm. you find it extremely hot just how quickly you can bring him to this point. so hot it brings you closer to your orgasm with him, putting your hands on his face to look up at you.

"you feel so fucking good, harry," you tell him, your head rolling back in pleasure. he's in awe of you, his eyes memorizing every single inch of you as you continue to ride him.

"please, please, can you, um…" he takes a second between his words to moan. "please, can you call me professor potter…" he asks, clearly embarrassed by the request.

you rub his blushing cheeks between your hands, his question only making you more turned on. you loved knowing he was just as into the teacher/student dynamic as you had been.

"your cock feels so…so fucking good inside of me, professor potter," you moan, resting your forehead against harry's as you slow your pace, thoroughly enjoying the feeling of him.

harry's eyes roll back, sinful moans escaping his lips as his head falls forward, watching you ride him slowly as he begins slightly thrusting up into you. he looks back up at your eyes, exasperated. "i'm gonna cum if you don't stop," he quietly warns you, clearly feeling a bit guilty at his eagerness.

you smile. "please, please cum for me professor. i've been such a good girl for you this semester, haven't i?" you tease him. 

harry groans pathetically. "so, so good," his eyes are closed, his face twisting with each thrust. "then cum for me, please, give it to me," you beg him, your hands gripping his shoulders as you feel your stomach tensing from your own orgasm.

harry's eyes pop open, his gaze on you softening as his hands find your waist, gripping onto you desperately. "[y/n]..." he moans your name again, and you can feel yourself tipping over the edge. your pace becomes a bit slower as your legs start shaking.

harry moans as he starts to spill inside of you, the warm sensation fueling your orgasm as you both hold onto each other tightly, riding out your highs together.

after a few moments of slow grinding and weak kissing, you carefully stand up from your position on harry's lap. you guide him to your bathroom, where you help each other clean up, with a few more inevitable kisses and longing hugs along the way.

you get dressed into different clothes, and offer harry some as well. he declines, instead putting his clothes back on as he tells you he has to bring all his supplies back to his house.

you help him button his shirt back up and tie his tie before pushing yourself to ask the dreaded question you didn't want to know the answer to.

"so," you say softly. "what now?"

harry looks down at you lovingly, but he isn't quite smiling. "well, i'm no longer employed here," he states. you nod your head slowly, allowing him to continue.

"so, while it's not technically wrong, i'd still like to try and take this off campus, if possible," harry chuckles.

you give him a surprised look. "you want to see me again?" you ask quietly. harry can't help but laugh at you, kissing your forehead as he holds your cheek.

"you have no idea," is all he says before he leans in for another kiss, holding you close, knowing you're finally his.

[bluemari23]

Hello Mari, how are you? I was very happy with the new notifications! Your writing is one of my favorites🙃❤️.

If you feel comfortable, could you write a headcanon aimed at the BTS members where we are the boys' romantic interest, being the 8th in the group? Maybe a foreign member.

NOTE: Thank you very much for your attention! I'm happy to see you back, a big hug❤️.

Hello! thank you so much!

and i took this almost as a poly idea the second i read it, so thats kind of how i wrote your ask if that's okay! :)

bf!namjoon who constantly tries to hide negative comments about you during live, not wanting you to see any hate for being their 8th member. He and the boys know that your relationship with them is a secret, but cant help but to still try to protect you from anything and everything. Knows when something is wrong during an interview and immediately will send a signal to their manage that the interview is over. Tries to be a confidant to you and help you integrate into idol society as their new member.

bf!jin who just tries to do whatever he can to help you in any way. "Oppa will do it". Knows you are independent but loves to help you with the little things like opening a jar of pickles. Will keep snacks near by for you knowing how you tend to stress eat. Will forever be your cooking buddy despite you loving to bake. Wants to try to bake for you but you might need to help him not put too much baking soda into the baked good.

bf!yoongi who may not show it, but is so in love with you that he knows everything. he is so observant and knows exactly how you like your orange peeled (with none of the white stuff left because you can't stand the texture of it). Loves that you will hold his whenever he wants and for as long as he wants. Will never move first when cuddling on the couch, waiting until you make the first move. Is the first to sense something wrong by watching your facial expressions and body movements (like how you rub your fingers together when nervous or anxious).

bf!hoseok who takes extra time to help you learn all of their choreography so you don't falll behind with their new music/choreo. Is the best at getting you up and out of bed when you feel down from the hate youre getting online. will bring you your favorite coffee/tea when he knows you have an early morning. buys you your wardrobe (along with jimin) as they both want to dress you and take pride in the fact that you were the clothes they buy you. loves to dress you up in matching outfits.

bf!jimin who is very cuddly and affectionate. loves to lean on you and have you lean on him. spends a lot of time just being a buddy while you do chores or are getting ready for a schedule. just loves to being your ocmpany, not needing anything planned. will just lay in bed with you for hours, keeping you from stewing too long on things not in your control. stops the company from putting you on a diet for their next comeback because you are absolutely perfect to him and the boys.

bf!taehyung who loves to go explore with you. any new city you guys go to he likes to take you out to explore life in the city and find new places. loves to buy you accessories like scarves and sunglasses because then you guys match. taehyung who reads out all the "marry me y/n" and maybe makes some up just to see you smile and politely decline. loves trying to get a reaction out of you and maybe tag teams with jungkook to see who could get you flustered the most first.

bf!jungkook who loves to assert his dominance and "throw you around". loves to pick you up in his arms and throw you onto the couch or bed before smothering you in kisses. keeps you favorite treat in his bag so he can share it with you before jin sees. loves to do karaoke sessions with you on live and gets frequently caught by army staring at you in awe. jungkook who insists on sharing verses with you because he loves how your two voices mesh together. jungkook who knoes exactly how you like your ramen and makes it up before bringing it to you with a grin on his face.

[stevie-petey]

Decided to just send this in directly but! I have explanations for everything so buckle in bc when i say i have brain rot about this fic I MEAN IT ITS SO GOOD

1. BI BUG CONFIRMATION. ENOUGH SAID.

2. I will never forget reading that scene from season 1 of steve driving bug home w her bike in his trunk and her all flustered about it and i dont super remember what time of day it was in the scene but in my head it was right after sunset where the sun has set but its light creates this contrast that makes everything look cool toned in comparison to whats in the light n i wanted to play w that in the coloring also im a sucker for steve n his big arms so this was almost entirely self indulgent

3. The cardigan bc i needed to. I re read that chapter constantly it gives me all the warm n fuzzies and thats good for the soul

4. The phones were both an “i need to put this in here immediately bc my brain never stops thinking about it” and a filler for blank space. The colors for each are tied to what s3 bug and what s3 are associated w in my head like you cannot tell me bug isnt soft ivory coded and steve is not light grey-blue coded in s3 it just feels right for them (plus i needed to reference the nicknames at least once my very soul craved it)

5. Dustins hat was a lil bit of a last minute thing, i was working on a bigger piece w all of this kids n their looks for season 3 but it wasnt coming out the way i wanted it to so i scrapped it but i still wanted a something in there that wasnt steve or bug related and it felt fitting to put in dustins camp know where cap both bc of his relationships w steve n bug and bc every now and then i think about how dustin felt ditched by the party at the beginning and how heartbreaking that scene was when i read it n how much i just wanted to hug the lil guy bc feeling lonely at an age like that is so devastating it made my heart hurt for him so i wanted to have a lil thing for dustin in there somewhere

6. In the show i really liked the whole bit w steve asking girls out and robin keeping score n before you wrote this scene i was curious as to how you were going to go about it and it ended up cracking me up dude i love that scene if him just being awkward and so not “king steve” suave and i needed to put down how my brain saw that scene to something visual bc it was so ugh hes such a dork i love steves himbo self

7. Follow up is the lil doodle of steve n robin running around high as hell and there was no way i wasnt going to include that somehow if i am given the chance to write the phrase “trash popcorn” and draw robin frolicking i will take it with both hands and bolt

8. Going back to the whole “steve is a desaturated light blue in s3” thing i just wanted an excuse to draw my boy being cute in my head this is when hes helping bug put away books at her job and yes the anatomy is a lil wonky but i luv him and his hair swoops and joes side profile is so very fun to draw <3

Over all come home is wonderful n amazing and i love it n ur brain is so big n full of wrinkles

i genuinely cried when i first saw this im not kidding. im speechless, its so fucking beautiful and everything you drew from the fic is captured SO perfectly i cannot even begin to explain how much this means to me :(((( thank you so so so so much. truly.

the DETAILS ???? you brought the cardigan to life. its exactly how i envisioned it in my head, its BEAUTIFUL :((((( and bug being ivory and steve a blue ,,,, god you really truly nailed this i again cannot put into words how PHENOMENAL this is. the telephone lines being connected with their nicknames, steve carrying a box of books at bugs job, him driving and the setting sub (which you got EXACTLY. it was the same i envisioned in my head writing that scene), the bi colors on the lady bug like are u kidding me !!!! youre insane and i LOVE YOU !!!

steve n high robin doodle is so <333 and the steve scene at scoops with his flustered monologue in the background made me giggle so hard oh my god.

i know you dont know this, but my birthday is tomorrow and this is the best gift ive ever been given. i want to frame the doodles and put it on my bedroom wall because i am astounded and in awe of your talent and still so baffled my fic was brought to life !!!!! its mind boggling and i cannot thank you enough for this experience <333

(obviously with ur permission in reference to wanting to print n frame the doodles because theyre so dear to me and i respect ur talent !!)

[5am-mist]

oh my beautiful favorite bella writer, I have come back for more tee hee. would you possibly be open to write something were reader is an interviewer who is interviewing bella, flirting ensues >:33 (also take ur time bby ur work is the best <33)

Interviews

°pairing°> bella ramsey x reader

°summary°> you finally get the chance to interview the bella ramsey (who you may or may not have a huge crush on) but when they start flirting with you, you can't help but flirt back

°requested?°> yuppp!

°cw°> some small use of y/n just thought i would mention that!

~°A/N°~

OMG IM LITERALLY GIGGLING, BLUSHING AND KICKING MY FEET RN YOU'RE TOO GOOD TO ME <33 Thank you for the request and for being so patient with me i really hope this turned out how you wanted also i used she/her pronouns for bella hope thats ok! And im also just gonna apologize cause i know absolutely nothing about flirting and sorry if this isn't that good i haven't been feeling well at all lmaoo. i also made up a network you interview under so i hope thats ok! love youu <33

You were quite a well known interviewer and had developed quite the following. You'd interviewed countless celebrities at this point in your career, some more famous than others (not that it mattered to you all that much) but most of them very sweet.

The interview game was quite competitive or atleast more competitive than most would think. It was always a race to interview the most relevant celebrities. You had never been all that phased though, you enjoyed your job and yes as much as it was important for you to stay relevant you found that it was just as important that you interviewed celebrities you liked.

So that's what you did, but there was one celebrty on your mental list that you haven't interviewed. Bella Ramsey. Bella was with no doubt the celebrty you wanted to interview most, it wasn't that she didn't want to do the interview or that she was to busy no you just hadn't actually reached out to her manager yet.

You thought it was silly honestly. This was something you had wanted to do for ages but everytime you began typing the email you'd overthink and immediately stop yourself all because of the stupid crush you had on Bella.

It wasn't that stupid of a crush, it was totally justified in your mind because i mean who didn't have a crush on her? It made you so fustrated, you wanted to interview her more than anything in the world, why couldn't you just do it?

Here you were sitting infront of your laptop staring at the email you drafted to send to Bella's manager. You must've read it 1000 times, you checked every word for spelling mistakes and made sure your sentances were structured proffenssionly but it still didn't seem right. You were arguing with yourself, half of you saying this was perfect the other saying that it felt like a stranger wrote it.

You ended up scrapping it but this time you were going to do it properly. It was short and sweet and you made sure that it actually sounded like it came from you, even though you weren't 100% happy with it, you decided to send it.

The next morning when you woke up the first thing you did was check your emails and to your surprise, you already recieved a response. Bella wanted to do the interview with you!From there you and her manager discussed the time and date and you also gave her the studios address.

...

The day had finally arrived and you were ecstatic. You were going to finally get to interview the Bella Ramsey. It truly was a dream come true. The morning dragged on far longer than you'd liked but eventually the time came for you to head to the studio.

You were talking with the camera man making sure all was set and ready to go when Bella and her manager walked in. You stood there for far to long trying process that it was actually happening before snapping back to reality and going over to greet them.

Bella was nicer then you could have ever imagined. She was kind and gentle but most importantly she seemed just as happy to be here as you which gave you a sense of comfort. After telling Bella's manager that she could sit just off camera, you two decided to get started.

You waited for the camera man's signal and then began. "Hello welcome back to Zee Network I'm y/n and today im here with Bella Ramsey." you said with a smile on your face. "Hello!" they gave a quick wave and smile to the camera.

"Thank you for joing us today Bella, may i ask what has your experience been with the media lately? With release of the last of us series, you have gotten alot more recognition what is that like?" you were fiddling with the mic in your hands, another thing that you were known for was not reading from a script which normally was fine but today it really wasn't any help.

"I would say I've had a bit of a mixed experience lately. I have received many new fans and loads of support but i have also recieved a significant amount of hate. I try not to let it affect me but every now and again i will read a comment that really cuts deep. I appreciate the recognition i have gained and sometimes we just have to take the good with the bad." she told you, she seemed torn between loooking at the camera or at you but ended up deciding to look at you.

The interview continued on for a few minutes before Bella finally spoke up, "Do i make you nervous?," she had very clearly seen you fidgeting with the mic, you looked at her extremely confused what to say next. Was Bella Ramsey flirting with you? No, you were sure that you were just jumping to crazy conclusions.

"A little bit, I've wanted to do this interview for a while i guess im just a bit nervous to mess things up," you tried laughing it off. "I've also wanted to do this interview for a while, I've seen your work and you seemed like such a cool person now i know i was right,"

She absolutely was flirting with you. Now the way you saw it was you cluld continue the interview like normal and stay 100% professional or you could flirt back. You chose the latter.

You tried to do be smooth about it (trying to avoid the camera man noticing so that you wouldn't get yelled at) but still obvious enough for Bella to notice.

When the interview was over you walked over to the concessions table to grab some water but were called over by the camera man. He scolded you lightly for your behavior this interview but said he'd let it slide one time.

After being scolded by her manager Bella made her way over to you, she said she wanted to apologize but you told her it really wasn't a big deal.

"I meant what i said though, you seem cool and i'd really like to hang out sometime," now it was her turn to be nervous. "like a date?" it was an incredibly bold move but you were willing to take your chances. " yea, like a date." she flashed you a hopeful smile and of course you said yes.

Bella then handed you a small white paper with their number and a small 'can't wait to talk to you' scribbled on with black ink before scurrying off with her manager to the car that was currently waiting for them.

[luimagines]

Hi little leaf!! I've been questioning myself if I should send this to you bc Im quite shy with people that I never spoke to but Moss (Wayfarr) said it would be nice if I told you!!

I was reading your stuff again and found again the 2 fanfics ("He is upset and you comfort him" and "first kiss!") that made me uterly fall for Legend!! And I found that you wrote them!! (I saw it on the tag so I didnt remembered who wrote it)

Ive read them in February and ever since I cant stop thinking about Legend (literally every fucking day you have no idea, my friends cant stand me anymore 💀) and ofc I dont shut the fuck up about him (such a simp ffs), so thats completely your fault bc oh my fucking god what a good writing

You have any idea how many times I daydreamed about the scenarios you wrote???? About him????????????? You should go to jail /lh/J hehehehehehehehehehe

But honestly thank you so much for doing such an amazing and thoughtful writing, is really a bliss waking up at 4am and getting out late to work bc I was busy devouring every single one of your fics all over again JFKWNFKWNDKWKDKKWRKWKKS

I really love your work and I hope you never stop <3333 wish you a lovely week and every single day of your life bc you deserve it!!!! Mwamwamwamwa

Toodlessss 🍃🍃🍃

𖠰 Woods 𖠰

I'm very glad that Legend lives in your head rent free. XD

In all seriousness, this was an absolute delight to receive in my inbox and I was hesitant to reply at first because I wanted to keep it. But I figured you, like everyone else who sends me something, should get a response.

"He is upset and you comfort him" is actually one of the first things I wrote in general. So I'm very happy that they still hold up all these years later. <3

Legend has always been one of my favorites to write! I'm very glad that it comes through. He's so snarky and sassy. I love him. :)

I hope you have a great day/afternoon/evening/night! Wherever you may be.

[cosmicmunsonwrites]

always forever pt 2

pairing(s): anakin skywalker x oc!padawan

warnings: puking

summary: after getting hurt in battle, anakin and obi-wan are there to comfort serenity.

authors note: hi guys. this is another snippet of my anakin skywalker fic on wattpad! read here.

not edited

do not copy my works. i do not condone rewrites, translations, or edited versions. all my content is my content that i wrote.

not my gif

her head was spinning, her stomach cramping, and the acidic fluid was slowly crawling up her chest to her throat. she managed to swallow it back down and open her eyes, looking around at the basic room. she'd never been here before. she didn't recognize it at all.

she attempted to sit up, immediately hearing a protest from across the room. "i wouldn't do that if i were you," anakin said.

she groaned and laid back, rubbing her eyes and looking over at him. "what?"

"its not smart to try to get up right now," he said softly. "you're hurt."

she sighed and immediately felt the pain in her thigh return. "i'm fine," she lied.

the corners of his lips curled up slightly. "oh really? tell your mind that."

"you're reading my thoughts?" she asked curiously. qui-gon had taught her how to keep people out of her head. she'd been using that technique ever since. how was he doing that?

he let out a chuckle under his breath. "because you're hurt," he replied. "it makes you more vulnerable. when we first met, i couldn't read anything."

before she even had the opportunity to reply, the door was opening and her mentor was entering the room. she feared what he'd say. maybe he'd never send her on a mission again. it wasn't her first, but she felt as though it may be her last due to this. and his silence was only making it worse.

"i'm sorry master," she blurted out immediately in defeat. "i failed you."

he moved to sit on the side of the bed next to her, a comforting smile on his lips. "no need to apologize. you did not fail me, dear. things happen and thats alright. not everything goes as planned. you handled it better than i could've asked," he said softly, holding her hand in his own. "i should've never sent you out there with no protection. because of my reckless decision, you got hurt."

maybe if i were a better fighter and less scared of the possibilities, i would've never gotten hurt and i could've completed the mission, she thought, completely forgetting the two could read what she was thinking.

obi-wan let out a soft sigh and squeezed her hand tighter. "anakin, may i have a word with serenity? alone please?"

he nodded. "yes master," he complied, stepping out of the room and shutting the door behind him.

"you did not fail me, serenity," the jedi said. "you are one of the greatest i have ever known. at your age, i couldn't do half the things you can. if i were in your situation, that hunter would've killed me. you can even ask qui-gon. therefore you should be proud, dear. you held your own."

she shook her head slowly. "if i didn't waste so much energy, i could've taken him and got the job done. i wasn't thinking and it cost everything."

"it did not," he reassured. "my top priority isn't finding some planet or meeting the prime minister, its about keeping you and anakin safe. and you're still alive, aren't you?" she nodded in response. "then you have nothing to worry about. you did better than i could've ever asked of you."

she squeezed his hand tighter and took a much needed deep breath. "thank you master."

he gave her a crooked smile. "now keep those negative thoughts out, alright? i'm proud of you, dear," he said before pressing a soft kiss to her forehead. "anakin, you may come in."

the padawan quickly returned, once again closing the door behind him and returning to his spot by the corner.

"why did he come after me?" serenity asked suddenly. "the hunters. i thought they wanted senator amidala."

"it is clear that they've also taken a liking to you and your abilities as well," obi-wan said distastefully with a scowl. "that yellow mist was to weaken you. we're not sure how long it'll take to wear off, but the nurses gave you something to help bring it back up faster. and until we can confirm your safety from these hunters, anakin will be stationed with you to keep you protected while you heal."

she dug the heels of her hands into her eyes and groaned. "i'm fine master. i feel normal."

"i can read you, reni. you're not fine," he replied like a parent.

she huffed out a frustrated breath, immediately regretting that decision when she felt a burn slide along her throat. she immediately sat up despite the pain in her body and headed towards the bathroom. leaning over the toilet to vomit up the contents of her stomach. she felt a comforting hand on her upper back and another holding her hair away from her face.

she felt like she wanted to cry. she wasn't sure the last time she genuinely did cry, but her fear of throwing up was really hitting her like a bus right now.

once she felt somewhat okay, she used a paper towel that was laid out to wipe her mouth and lean back against the wall. she watched as obi-wan entered the bathroom while anakin continued rubbing soft circles with his palms.

"you feel fine, right?" their master teased softly.

she nodded, stomach turning again. "i do. i just have a fear of vomiting," she admitted embarrassingly.

"you're meant to fight in some of the most difficult situations and you swore yourself to the jedi code for a lifetime but you fear vomiting?" he said with a slight grin, trying to hold his laugh back.

she once again nodded with a straight face. just thinking about it was enough to cause her to hurl over the toilet and let out whatever was sitting uneasily in her stomach. anakin held her hair away again, lightly patting on her back this time to try to get everything out to spare her from this pain again.

she wiped her mouth once more and leaned back, closing her eyes and taking deep breaths. she absolutely hated this disgusting feeling. "i don't think i have anything else left in me right now," she mumbled weakly under her breath.

"do you want to lay back down?" anakin asked softly, offering a hand for her to take, which she gratefully did with a soft 'yes.' he carefully pulled her up and escorted her into the bed with a hand on her lower back, making sure she didn't fall or anything on the way.

"i'm gonna go get you something to eat, alright? you need something in your stomach after that." obi-wan said. "watch over the room anakin, i will return shortly." and with that, he disappeared out of the room.

the padawan trailed over to the singular sofa and took a seat to give his legs a break. "you shouldn't beat yourself up over this too much you know," he said softly. "one time when i messed up so bad, he banned me from going on missions for three months until i finally got over myself and admitted that it wasn't my fault," he explained quickly. "the sooner you admit that it wasn't your fault, the faster this journey will continue for you."

"three months is harsh," she chuckled softly. "is that why he took me on missions so often for a while?"

anakin couldn't help but let out a laugh. "probably." the room fell into a comfortable silence now. he looked over at the bed she was laying in then towards the door their mentor would be walking through soon. "he seems to really care for you."

she was a bit caught off, trying to comprehend what he was talking about. "what?"

"master kenobi," he said clearly. "he seems like he has a soft spot for you." he shifted slightly in his seat and got a bit more comfortable. "how'd you two meet anyway?"

"i could ask you the same," she replied with a slight grin.

he smiled and breathily chuckled. "i'll tell you if you tell me," he offered.

[petruchio]

I love love love your Finnick/Annie series!! I was reading the last chapter wondering how you could end it and it was so well done.

I’m kinda wondering on what your thoughts are on what happens to Annie after? Cause you touched on the idea of the capitol kind of exaggerating the whole “mad girl” persona for her so it would be so eye opening to find out that (pre-mockingjay of course) she wasn’t as crazy as everyone thought and they kept up that persona to keep her away from the capitol. But I could also see where as worse things were happening, especially when you get to the hunger games and catching fire, that would be tough and kind of lead to a downfall there? And then she would eventually get to how we meet her in the series.

Hopefully this makes sense! Basically I’m just fathoming the connection between what you wrote and the series we know and love. I just think Annie is such an interesting character that isn’t talked about a lot other than the fact that Finnick loved her.

yeah good question!! and ahhhh im so happy you liked it!! 🤍

i kind of think two things — so first, in terms of playing up the mad girl persona, i absolutely subscribe to that belief lol. in my story what i kind of alluded to is that i think finnick plays a role in playing up the mad girl thing to protect/save her from going through what he went through. and it works obviously which is why peeta buys into it in catching fire.

and then second, i really combed over the books for any annie moments and i think it’s significant that we actually only meet her AFTER she’s rescued from the capitol. so like, we truly meet her at her absolute lowest, and EVEN SO the only thing katniss says is that she’s, like, kind of odd and laughs in strange places in conversations. so all that is to say my interpretation is that she’s not actually all that “mad” — she’s traumatized of course but when we do finally actually meet her she’s dealing w the horror of whatever happened in the capitol, so i imagined a pre-capitol annie as being even less “mad” than her couple of lines in the books.

so i guess thats a long winded way of saying i kind of wrote it (and imagine it) to be both that they play up the mad girl persona to protect her from getting the finnick/johanna/haymitch treatment and ALSO that whatever happens to her in the capitol sends her into an even worse place that gives us the person we meet in mockingjay.

but that’s just me!!!! and ofc that’s also kind of specific to the one story i chose to tell — i can imagine a thousand other backstories and other paths for her. i think that’s why i found this to be such an interesting story to write, bc her and finnick have much less clearly defined stories as opposed to katniss and peeta, so there was a lot more to play around with and invent there.

thanks again for your sweet words <3333 im so happy you liked the story and thanks so much for reading!!

[admiringlove]

hello!! congratulations on 2k followers! thats a big milestone :)

i'd like to send in something for the event!

my name is yves and my favorite haikyuu character is sakusa 💌 i like to draw digitally in my spare time and i love spicy food and sweet snacks. other than drawing, i also like calling with my friends, listening to calming music and designing characters. oh and, if this info is helpful i'm an INTP! :)

thank you for your time and again congratulations on 2k!! you deserve it 🤲

spicy food and late night calls.

hello yves! thank you for the request! i hope this came out as well as you imagined it :)

when the doorbell to your apartment rung, you didn't expect there to be two delivery men from two different stores standing on the other side. they looked just as confused as you. and when you said that you hadn't ordered anything, they said the same thing.

"but the order was placed by sakusa kiyoomi."

you raised an eyebrow, immediately pulling out your phone and texting him.

hey, did you order food and flowers?

his reply comes within milliseconds. as if he was waiting for you to ask that question.

omi: they're for you.

his reply makes you smile, reminding you of how you were early on in your relationship with him. going on dates that had very low budgets because of how broke the two of you were, him buying you small trinkets and telling you the same thing as he did now, "they're for you". you remember the time he gifted you a new digital pen—it had been from his first official salary from being in the msby jackals. he'd said the same thing to you when you'd looked up at him in awe after opening the gift. "it's for you", his voice had been soft, but it echoed through your heart as you wrapped your arms around him and shed tears into his chest, thanking him for simply being there. he'd kissed the top of your head, telling you not to cry as he rubbed your back. from then on, you'd taught kiyoomi how to draw on a tablet. he found it quite irritating at first, having to keep his hand above the screen. but from irritated groans to your background snickers, he'd learned. and now, he preferred to draw parts of you on the screen. whether it be your eyes, the little specks of white and black in them in much detail. or your hands, every vein and bone accentuated.

you let out a small chuckle as you apologize to the two delivery men, taking the bouquet and takeout inside. as you place the packages on the counter, you find the note attached to the flowers.

and then, there's a call incoming from your phone. you know it's him by the ringtone you'd kept for him.

"you're quite the charmer, omi," you grin, "sending me food, flowers and handwritten notes even though you're halfway across the country? how romantic."

"so i don't even get a hello anymore," he retorts, "how unromantic."

"you don't need a hello when all you'll be getting are kisses from me when you get back," you mumble, "but really, how'd you manage to send a note you wrote yourself when you're in okinawa?"

"i went to the florist last night," he says, "wrote the note and told them to deliver it tonight. isn't that thoughtful of me?"

"i think you're getting in over your head," you giggle, pulling out the takeout containers, "also i can smell the spicy stuff. my nose is tingling."

"yeah, i don't miss that at all," you laugh when you hear him say that, reminiscing the time when you first made him eat the noodles from your favorite restaurant. his face had gone red, sweat dripping from his chin to his hair, and he had his tongue out to quench the heat. all you could do then was laugh as he drank glass after glass of iced water.

"you should've told me you have a low spice tolerance," you tell him, opening the container and taking your first bite, "how was i supposed to know you would turn into a tomato?"

"my mouth was on fire," he quips. you can just visualize his narrow eyes and playful frown, "and before you took me there, you should've asked me if i could handle it or not. how was i supposed to know that you would attempt to murder my digestive system?"

you grin, plopping down on your couch as your voice becomes soft, "i miss you already."

"i know," he tells you, "four more days and then i'm back."

"four more days and then i have okinawa's finest sweets coming home to me."

"i knew it," he feigns an offended gasp, "you're using me for food."

"oh no," you say, in a disappointed tone, "you caught me."

© all works belong to admiringlove on tumblr. plagiarism is strictly prohibited.

[zedif-y]

ok rendaph. excuse me i only remember s9 right now and also im aroace but:

they meet while docs cleaning up the perimeter and ren falls in love with how dutiful zed is. wrangling all these sheep like its nothing! zed likes that ren is super Tough and Scary around the sheep and wishes he could be like him

and then zedaph decides to blow everyones eardrums up with his cacophony and ren, completely on a whim, helps him build a shop

and zedaph is so funny. he’ll joke around while ren does all the work of prettying the place up, and zed can see how dedicated ren is to what he builds and ren thinks that zed has the funniest jokes

later zedaph makes the cacophony and when they play it- well. ren thinks it’s beautiful for a moment. it was made by zed after all, with love and care and contempt for general music. he loves it. sometimes ren turns it on just to get zedaph down there

they have their first kiss in a well-music’d area. it’s not raucous or noisy or distracting. it’s a country song they’ll both forget when it’s done. zedaph is enjoying a sandwich - ren doesn’t even want to know what it’s made of - when suddenly zedaph yelps and pulls him into a hug. a creeper explodes harmlessly behind.

ren takes the opportunity to kiss him

and zedaph laughs nervously and says your breath smells weird, did you brush them? and ren laughs and laughs and laughs. its easy to be with zedaph. he’s beginning to see what tango sees in him. zedaph enjoys the kiss too. they kiss again, don’t worry. they’re not doomed by the narrative. the narrative doesn’t seem to notice them really

thats a good thing. they saw how the desertduo turned out.

…wow i wrote a lot. haha. guess i have more on my mind in terms of rendaph than i thought

oh . oh this . this is SO sweet and so cute oh my god . oh my god 10/10 lovely ask thank you so much for sending this in anon you're amazing . this is amazing . i will rotate it in my head forever and ever

[actualbird]

hiii, first off im gonna say I love your fics, and I love your analysis of all the NXX boys, it rlly made me wanna learn more about the non-luke characters lol. (plus that one fic of yours that was omega luke going into heat permanently lives inside my head)

I just wanted to say abt the ask that wonders if Rosa knows Luke's illness is chronic - he tells her explicitly that the doctors have told him he has less than three years of life left in story 3 of under the milky way. it's right at the start of story 3, in the letter he sends rosa.

which also leads me to a question about the canonicity? canon-ness? canonnity? of the cards. I'm sorry if I'm just completely out of the loop, I dropped ToT for a bit before coming back and I have a terrible memory. but are all the events in these cards canon? because like the asker said, it rlly would change the dynamic if Rosa thought the illness was just chronic. (also I forgot if he mentioned the 3 year thing elsewhere). post-utmw Rosa knows he only has 3 years left but does regular rosa know?

I think I'm just incoherent and I'm sorry for the long ask haha it was rlly rambly but yeah that's basically what I wanted to ask.

hi anon!! first off oh gosh, thank you for your kind words!!

im so glad you like both my analyses and my fics (especially the omega luke fic gosh, it’s been so long since then, i almost forgot i wrote that HAHA)

now in regards to that ask youre mentioning, i fear there mightve been a misunderstanding! cuz in that ask, we were pertaining to the mc that exists within the Main Story Route. whereas the mc youre describing is the mc that exists within the Luke Personal Story route. forgive me if i misunderstood but to explain, eventually, main story and personal story (aka where all the respective cards, respective personal stories, and probably even the team events in a wibbly wobbly timey wimey way, exist in) diverges

to better visualize this, ive made a chart. but you caught me at a time i was doodling and had my drawing tablet plugged in so we’re all getting a taste of my bad handwriting

so if you look at this, you'll first notice how i forgot the number 6 in main story and then rushed to squeeze it in. but more importantly this is what i mean by diverging

based on what i remember, im pretty sure (....okay semi-pretty sure) that for all of the boys, main stories 1-5 has happened. this is because cards will mention dangerous/busy work (nxx work) and thus mc must be part of the team first for that work to happen. main stories 1-5 also must have happened because thats how she meets/works with (or re-meets, in luke's case) all of the boys one by one. after which, the personal story routes (along with all the cards) happens in a divergent timeline

there are some caveats tho. very very early cards of luke (and for this ask i will focus on luke's divergent personal story route timeline, just for simplicities sake.....should i abbreviate too? Luke's DPSRT = divergent personal story route timeline. Luke's MSRT = main story route timeline. perfect. that totally makes things less confusing!) mention mc not yet knowing where luke was during his 8 year disappearance, meaning that those cards MUST have happened BEFORE main story 5, when he tells the truth about where he went

barring little bits like those though, this divergence generally stands. the biggest proof of the divergence showed up in main story 9 because at that point, mc in Luke's DPRST already Knew about luke's illness. but mc in Luke's MSRT does not, and does not know as much as of the details as well.

another smaller proof that Luke's DPRST and Luke's MSRT are divergent is aaron. in Luke's DPRST, mc meets aaron for the very first time in bloom chapter personal story 4. but in Luke's MSRT, mc meets aaron for the first time in main story 9.

now on canonicity? my answer is yes

on like, everything.

barring the AU cards (like sott and gufeng cards, yknow), everything in all timelines is canon. just NOT at the same time. you can only choose one and---

oh my god wAIT THIS RESPONSE IS ONE I CAN USE TO ANSWER ANOTHER ASK IN MY INBOX, SIT TIGHT ANON 1

CUZ I GOT THIS ASK A FEW DAYS AGO FROM AN ANON I WILL CALL ANON 2:

and my answer to anon 2 over here is

i think the prologue is a dream sequence or some kind of metaphor or some kind of fever dream, yeah, but one that takes place in the Main Story Route Timeline specifically. and that something went wrong. terribly wrong, though idk what yet exactly.

the reason i think this happens in the MSRT in particular is cuz of 1) it's a prologue to main story in particular, i feel + 2) because of what we call "pulls" in this game: we use a Tear (of themis) to receive a pull of a card, which are called Visions.

all the cards of happier romances take place in divergent timelines, and these are visions because maybe it is MSRT mc who is having visions of these different possibilities that couldve happened, if only she werent in this timeline she chose, in the main story timeline where so many horrible things happen.

.....i feel as if ive said the word "timeline" way too many times to be making sense now, but theres my answers, anon 1 and anon 2!!

i hope something in here was useful and/or interesting ;w;

[bonesandthebees]

IM STILL EXCITED ABOUT ROSE DJDJDJD

and maybe even more now that im reading priory (look at me finally noticing its not priority after all this time lol) im just really in the royalty vibes yk and would love to read more of rose

but at the same time im reading priory so, ive got over 700 pages still to go (and a whole sequel/prequel thing that I believe is longer) so I dont mind waiting at all

(also finding out priory is shorter than stars is fucking with my brain like its THAT long???)

and about priory, thats a big book with big words and im struggling ngl, definitely the hardest thing ive read in english (and ive read the iliad and odyssey)

but its so cool, im enjoying all the court things and the hierarchy and religions and just about everything, also DRAGONS

this book talks about periods and now I have undying respect for the author

anyway, good luck with any writing (original work is cool af so write whatever you feel like), but dont stress about constantly putting something out

sending love to yall <3

part of the reason I read priory in the first place was because I wanted to read more royalty fantasy stories as research for writing rose. then I fell in love with samantha shannon's world so that was a bonus but yeah I just love royalty vibes I love reading them and I love writing them it's just so good rahhh

god. finding out stars was longer than priory also broke my brain. wdym I wrote that much. what's wrong with me.

I can imagine priory would be really difficult to read if english isn't your first language. there were a few words in it I didn't even know and I'm a native english speaker. I hope it's not too difficult that you can't enjoy it though because it's such an incredible story. I absolutely adore the exploration of religion and differences in religious myths and how myths like that can get distorted over time it's such an interesting subject

YES IT ALSO TALKS ABOUT PERIODS!! samantha shannon never shies away from mentioning things like periods and how the women in her stories deal with them and it's so refreshing. also, in a day of fallen night, one of our POV characters is a woman in her 50s and very early on there's a mention of how she's dealt with menopause which was also incredibly refreshing like yes these are real things women deal with that are just never talked about it's so nice to see them just casually mentioned!

thank youuu I'm trying not to put stress on myself but I feel bad :((( it's ok I'm taking my time

[doctorweebmd]

hi this isn't a question i just desperately need to tell you how much zero sum game ruined me and put me back together again. lurking mental illness and suicidality under shit circumstances, physical disability, mental and physical scars, constantly fighting off the ptsd and having to learn how to cope in ways that don't hurt other people so you can hang onto the person that makes it all worth it. it's everything i've gone through, right down to soul destroying and healing intimacy, at first to feel pain and then to attempt feeling truly good for the first time. zero sum is undoubtedly going to be one of those artworks i can never shake off my psyche in the best way, like an abstract background hug for my heart. thank you so much for taking so many scary themes to tackle and packaging them so beautifully, i really needed that lately.

sincerely, a previous battle of the bands fan who is now absorbing your entire oeuvre into their personality.

first i want to thank you profusely for sending me this. thank you for sharing your own experience, and your own pain. i know thats not easy and i'm some random person but honestly reading this makes me feel not so alone in the world. of course, thank you for reading, but also for relaying that you felt seen by it. i always feel so silly because its a my hero academia fanfiction but, with all sincerity, words like yours are what make writing it worth it.

zero-sum is sincerely my favorite thing i've ever written and probably always will be. not because i think the plot is awesome or the physics stuff was cool (EVEN THOUGH I STILL THINK THOSE THINGS ARE TRUE) but because its the first time i was able to write about my own personal experiences with mental illness (heavily projected onto Katsuki and Izuku, lmao) in over ten years.

Okay fair warning i am going to overshare under the cut so please feel free to stop reading also I love you and cherish you and appreciate you thank you so so so much for sending this

i'm sharing this because, at some point, i needed to read this. maybe someone will stumble on to it and realize something. maybe not. maybe its just another way for me to continue to process what happened. i think i'll always be processing it. mental illness is a bitch

when things got really bad for me (the first time around) i stopped writing completely. at that time, i truly, from the bottom of my heart, believed that my disorder was the only thing that made my writing interesting. that if i was to recover, that means i could no longer do the only thing i was good for. unironically, writing was actually a major barrier to my recovery for some time.

writing, the thing i loved most in the world, started heavily triggering me.

so i stopped.

the problem was, i heavily romanticized what i was going through in my writing. i made the suffering 'beautiful.' by thinking it was beautiful, i was trapping myself in a loop of self-destruction.

they say, 'write what you know.' but all i knew was misery. so misery was what i wrote.

romanticizing your pain is something i think we all do. sometimes you have to. its a survival mechanism. if the pain is 'beautiful,' then its 'tolerable' to go through.

what no one really tells you about mental illness is that its really, really fucking lonely.

what no one tells you about recovery is, its even lonelier. its the most isolating thing in the world. everything you relied on, everything you thought to be true, the way you interact with the world completely changes.

things are always going to be different. you can't go back to who you were before.

what i did do, when i went into recovery, was read the very few published books about people with (disorder) who recovered. over and over and over again. i needed something to latch on to. anything. i needed to believe it was possible. i needed to believe people like me survived. that they could find happiness. that they could find love. that there is space in this world for people as broken as me.

i dont know. zero-sum, to me, was a love letter to that 19 year old kid that hit her (first) rock bottom. i pretended she didn't exist because it hurt too much to think about her. but what she needed to know, then, that recovering, no matter how difficult, was worth it. that life can and WILL get better. that she will one day wake up every morning and think 'fuck. i'm so glad i'm alive.' that even people like her can find happiness.

that one day, many years later, embarrassed, she'll show her scars to a person she just started dating. that he'll sheepishly show her his. that they'll exchange police reports like love letters. she'll learn that there are people out there that understand her. have felt her same pain. have lived through the same hell. she'll learn that survival is sometimes based on hope, and sometimes based on spite.

but is, despite it all, always worth it.

she'll learn that her suffering does not preclude her from love and connection and happiness.

that one day, she won't feel so alone.

and that one day, she'll be able to sit down at her computer and write about it. maybe it will be in the form of my hero academia fanfiction lmao but that doesn't make it any less real.

maybe it will reach someone. maybe it won't.

but one day, she'll be able to do the thing she loved more than anything in the world again, because nothing is ever truly lost.

there is a future worth fighting for.

[cringe--is--dead]

Hiya scarlet darling! Hope you’re doing well and that the weather is just how you like it (since everyone’s got a different favorite kinda weather) I’m here for a matchup if that’s alright! Please and thank you uwu)/

About me hmmm I’m always running around doing something whether it’s working or finding another hobby (that i have way too many of) I’m really relaxed (despite the chaotic schedule) and easy going and I love to take care of people!

Hobbies-wise I like to travel the most but baking and gardening are close seconds! Special interests are animals probably? I know a ton about them and tons of fun facts. Also I could talk about baking, eating, food for days and days.

I have a cat that is so clingy I could throw him and he’d shoot back like a boomerang lol. My style is girly and colorful i guess? and anything sparkly is good! a wonderful mix of cute but comfortable so there’s gotta be pockets on everything. I love a good overall too but…😩 im getting off track

I actually love period pieces like bridgerton or the gilded age and old black and white movies are so fun! I love fantasy too especially in books (i read TONS) and theres a movie called stardust that’s also a book? One of my all time favs. But old 80’s movies with the special effects are also delightful for me (and another special interest i forgot.)

important stuff ahh I’m affectionate with the people i love but when people show it back i get all flustered about it I’m like what do mean you love me 🫣 how bold despite clinging to them and gushing praises at them on the regular. I do end up blushing a lot even just when I get excited talking about what I like and I don’t come up for air while chatting a mile a minute. I love spending time with the people I care about to the point where I’ll drag them everywhere with me if im able to. I also tend to worry about them quite a lot even when there’s really nothing to worry about. I’m a little airheaded and daydream-y when I’m not busy doing something. Thats probably the only time I’m quiet tbh

SORRY IF I WROTE TOO MUCH I hope something in it was helpful ヽ(；▽；)ノ anyways I love you you’re the sweetest!!!<3 have a seriously awesome day!

NEVER APOLOGISE FOR WRITING! There can never be too much! (*＾▽＾)／

Also Stardust? Literally changed my life when I first watched it! Amazing movie! Never read the book but I'm adding that to my list!

MOVING ON!

I match you... with Umemiya!

The gardening hobby definitely caught my attention, but there are other reasons! Umemiya strikes me as the type of guy who takes care of everyone first before even thinking about himself, so having someone who cares for others means he has someone who will care for him! Making sure he rests, making sure he takes his glasses off before he sleeps, helping him in the garden, helping him style his hair, etc. All the little things you do to help him has his heart fluttering!

He loves hearing you talk about animals, even listens about different birds in the area and what their diets are, researches different veggies and seeds to add to the garden to try and get more birds visiting so you can see them!

Plus someone who loves cooking? He sends you home with fresh veggies almost weekly! You're saving money whenever you go grocery shopping, and if you bring him bentos with that food he eats it all! He brags about it to everyone too!

He would love your cat, but he would also have silent stare-downs with said cat for your affection. He goes to lay his head in your lap, but your cat's already there. Now they're silently staring at each other, neither blinking. You have to adjust both of these big babies to cuddle both of them.

I also can see you getting him to watch Bridgeton with you, and he is SO enthralled! You have nights where you eat snacks and binge episodes, he plays the soundtrack when on the roof tending to the garden. You created a monster, that's what you've done!

Ume also would love someone as clingy as he is, and even more so if he can fluster you while the affection happens! He gives me cute aggression energy, so if you're blushing whenever he proclaims he loves you or you two share a kiss, expect to have your cheeks squished between his hands.

I hope you enjoyed this! HAVE A GREAT DAY!

[whumpshaped]

Hello! I just wanted to let you know that I really enjoyed glitching. It’s a bit embarrassing to say, but I barely interacted with it in any way that you could see because the format made me feel guilty about reading whump in a way that I hadn’t felt in a long time. That’s a compliment to your writing! Glitching was about being an accomplice and moral choices and I got caught up in it that I stopped participating in the polls after a few posts. I really liked it though.

Since you couldn’t see the likes that I very much wanted to give the series, I’m sending my thanks directly. You are really good at writing, and your specific style is one of my favorites on this site. Your writing is just brutal in a way that a lot of whump writing isn’t, and your characters are extremely compelling/whumpable. I can’t describe exactly what I love about it, but I do love it. You also made glitching really quickly, which is impressive. I’m still in awe of how you made all the different endings for the finale. That must have taken forever.

Was Glitching always going to end the way it did? If the audience had voted to kill Seth at the earliest opportunity, would that have happened? Are there any other pathways that you had planned out that we didn’t get to see? Basically, I loved Glitching and I want to hear all the behind the scenes details that you are willing to share.

Thanks again!

aaaaaaaaaa thank u SO much for this. long ass response under the cut !

this is honestly.... mostly all i wanted to achieve w glitching. (my first objective was to create a whump cyoa story where the options were all bad, bc in all the other ones ppl kept picking the good ones and i was like :| but my whump..? no whump..?) several times i felt like maybe the second person pov is too much and its too real and itll turn everyone off... but then i thought. thats. kind of what i want. i want it to feel a little gross even if its fiction. i wanted to make ppl feel conflicted.

so please dont feel bad about not interacting! i understand how it could feel rly bad and guilt-inducing. im glad u made the decision to stop interacting when u did, its NOT embarrassing in the slightest. this message means a whole lot either way.

hehehehehe im GLAD theyre brutal! thats very much the style i wanna be known for lol and the style i enjoy! i want stuff to be gruesome and disgusting! i want it to be brutal and unforgiving! i want violence! i want gore! and also thank u, im glad my characters r whumpable. especially w glitching, i saw that when other ppl put their cute ocs in situations no one wanted to hurt them, so i was like ok whos my most vile most hated most disgusting oc whom everyone would Love to see be punched in the face- in general i love making my ocs whumpable and pitiful. i love a pitiful little guy

i stopped writing glitching when my exams started at college, and iced it after maybe chapter 8 or 9. then i picked it back up again after i got a 20th message in my inbox abt how ppl miss it, and it successfully forced my hand to finally sit down and just Write. (i do have to be forced to write a lot of the times. it doesnt work for everyone, but it does for me. obviously i can never get in the zone if i dont even open the document yknow. thats why i write a lot of shitty drabbles! it keeps up momentum!) and then i just kept writing. and writing. and writing. trying to get a chapter out every day because i knew what i wanted to do and i wanted to finish it. when it comes to the finale, iiiii decided i wanted to do that whole thing literally 2 days beforehand. my friend told me "wow these options r all good" and i said "i know i kinda wanna see all of them too". and the idea was born. the seed was planted. the bug was in my fucken ear.

so the next morning i checked the poll on chapter 13, and saw that of course the option to keep seth alive was winning by far. so i wrote that in advance. then i started writing out the endings for the finale. i managed to get maybe 3 of them done. then the next day i finished the other 6, tweaked the earlier ones, all that. i uploaded them all, posted everything privately, fiddled forever w the links (which i knew were likely gonna break anyway-) and THEN WHEN THE TIME CAME I WANTED TO MAKE ONE LAST EDIT AND ACCIDENTALLY POSTED IT. so i had to unprivate everything in a fucking frenzy like OH MY GOD PPL WONT UNDERSTAND I RUINED IT I RUINED EVERYTHING. but anyway yes it took me like 2 days of writing and editing but the response was soooooo worth it. ppl were so so so kind to me. it was honestly amazing.

one thing abt me, i started planning my stories At All in the last few months. before that, Nothing. and especially w smth like glitching, where the audience's decision influences the next chapter and i cant plan ahead, i didnt even bother. whatever the audience chose was always gonna happen. if they chose to exit the stream on the very first poll, i wouldve ended it. im serious. i thought abt pulling "you try to exit but it doesnt work" but then i was like. no. ppl can have one (1) chance to turn their heads away if they want, as a treat. i wouldve written a chapter about the debilitating guilt and lifelong "what if" feeling, and that wouldve been it. as for the earlier murder options, yes! i wouldve gone thru w it at any time. starting from maybe the 6th chapter (or whenever i brought in the murder option) the audience held the power to end the stream and seth's suffering. they chose not to. but they couldve.

one option that i wanted that never got chosen was the baseball bat. im obsessed w beating someone to the point of broken bones w a baseball bat. so when the ending was getting nearer and nearer, i thought about simply disregarding the last poll and writing a single chapter where the host goes "i respected the choices u made up until now, but this time, im making the decision". but i was like. no fuck that. this is an interactive story all about being able to choose ur own decisions. i just asked the audience to supply me w puppy seth commands, citing how it was interactive. i couldnt just go and ignore that two chapters later, yknow? plus as u said it kind of all hinged on the feeling of "i did this. im responsible". so if i took that responsibility away in the last second IN THE MOST IMPORTANT DECISION OF ALL it wouldnt have been good enough

most of the time i just kept giving the options i really wanted to write, and eventually, ppl picked them. it was a good story in the sense that the order didnt matter too much. i could give the same options, and the host was still able to carry them all out.

some more behind the scenes- i thought about revealing the host's identity multiple times. i thought about making them someone the audience already knew (like ren, my friend's oc who greatly inspired the character from the very first chapter), or someone who couldve been vaguely familiar but unknown (a former friend of pumpkin?), but in the end i just settled on the mystery. especially since i decided to give it a paranormal twist. i couldve NEVER made a better reveal than the mystery itself. never ever. some things dont have to be revealed.

but yeah! thats that. i rly enjoyed glitching, i loved the response i got (it was by far the most popular story ive ever posted on here w the most tags and comments and asks), and i loved how i managed to do the finale. it was concise, i can say i finished another story, and its just all around a great time. thank u so much for ur message !!!

[keeperoftinyarmy]

I have two levels of thought, for JK as an individual and JK as an artist. I'm not trying to trash him but I'm just trying to get my thoughts straight and seek your opinion because I feel a bit betrayed.

Now as an artist, I've always thought JK has great potential as a soloist. However so far, all his three singles released during solo era are pretty generic. I think its fine to like them but I expected better from him. I mean I'd expect this sort of music from a BP band member, not someone from BTS. As for the payola, I personally don't care even though I'm shocked about the extent of payola he's getting. I just can't take his achievements that seriously because of them though. And other people might find it hard to digest because it goes against things BTS preached as a band.

The thing that gets is me mad is that if they have this much capacity then everything I saw during Face - forget paid radio spins but just sending the audio to radio, the splitting of the streams by Spotify, the issues with the D2C web store, the issues with Hanteo - were all wilfully ignored by Hybe. But that has nothing to do with JK.

So anyway his songs and his choice to go for payola - I think it's fair to criticize JK on that but they have nothing to do with Jimin.

But there's just one thing thats genuinely made me question what JK is doing as a friend to Jimin and as individual. And that is the extended parallels between elements of Like Crazy and Seven. I say parallels because I don't want to say the c-word but that's what it is. Why are the concept photos, outfits, styling, and dance moves so similar between two songs that have no relation to each other. When I saw the concept photos, I wrote it off as a coincidence, but now with the choreography I find it hard to do that again. And JK has seen the LC dance - he watched it right on live so I can't pretend the hybe choreographer just gave him this dance and he didn't know anything. I just can't reconcile it in my head. I feel sad.

I respect your opinion and thank you for sharing it with me. I’m going to assume this isn’t a shade attack on Kookie and respond.

I will honestly say Seven is the first JK solo song I’ve really liked….except for My You. And that’s totally fine, every song is not for every person. It doesn’t change how talented JK is or how much I want him to succeed.

Payola… that’s a loaded word and we don’t know that happened. What I see are deals and connections and different modes of marketing than BigHit has used in the past. I’ve thought since Like Crazy and PD Bang house hunting in LA that BigHit was set on fully understanding how to create a huge hit in the US market - for JK’s release but also for future BTS releases. This is a business…a business that wants to make money and expand …so figuring out how to get to the top of Billboard should be their priority. I think they had a plan for Seven and Face’s success surprised them. I don’t think they hated it because their stock rose but I do think they continued their plan for their western push. Was Jimin’s album a casualty of that? Seems like but I don’t know. I’m proud of Face still doing well despite the challenges. Jimin’s next project will probably get even more internal support because of it.

Now…the part about the concept similarities…

Going from years of evidence from video, articles and the guys’ mouths Jimin and Jungkook are really close. That means they are discussing their work with each other. That means that any similarities between Face and Seven are fully known and approved by the two of them. Because if Jimin had an issue with Seven’s concept he would have spoken up…and no way JK would have done it if Jimin were upset by it. And I’d bet all my money on that fact.

I don’t think it was copying I think it was a deliberate connection maybe even a collaboration of sorts. I feel like there’s a thread between the two purposely put there by the artists.

This should not be a surprise to anyone that follows BTS…jikook often match and have similar ideas.