#that pen has been in love with him for years. my clueless boy.

[cravingpepsimax]

since he’s beginning to spread, here’s a rough timeline of events for the fujo bill au:

bill is defeated and is put in the theraprism

after who knows how long, bill begins coping with his spite and rage towards stan and ford by doing/making stuff that he thinks they’d hate.

he begins “shipping” stancest. bill doesn’t really GET the incest taboo, it seems pretty much entirely arbitrary to him, but he knows it exists and is something humans are REPULSED by. thus, he starts making stuff involving stan and ford dating each other. theraprism staff thinks it’s odd but him writing books about stan and ford kissing is significantly better than him writing books in an attempt to escape.

over time, bill starts getting actually invested. it may have started as pure spite, but he begins to remember things that, oh boy, sure do seem pretty incestuous, now that he thinks about it. at first, it’s funny — “HAHA, WOW, SIXER REALLY IS A FREAK, ISN’T HE?” — but then it becomes real.

since bill’s calming down and is no longer talking about wanting to murder the entire family 24/7, theraprism staff decides to move onto the next step in bill’s karma program: becoming pen pals with one of the people he used to terrorize. mabel’s a lot like bill, but not evil, so the theraprism staff choose her.

meanwhile, a 13 year old mabel gets a Crazy Paranormal Experience, in which she is told what’s going on. mabel agrees to be bill’s pen pal (he won’t be able to do any actual harm, and, worst-case scenario, it’d be funny to mess with him (note that, even though mabel’s 13, well over a year has passed for bill — time is merely a suggestion for beings as powerful as the theraprism staff)

bill HATES being made to do this stupid pen pal stuff. he can’t use it as a way out — the theraprism staff have been keeping a VERY CLOSE EYE ON HIM ever since the book, and it’s gonna be hard to trick mabel into doing ANYTHING for him. so, his first few letters are him insulting and trying to upset mabel, who doesn’t really seem to care at all.

eventually, in one of bill’s pieces of hate mail, he says some shit like “SIXER AND HIS BROTHER ARE REAL FREAKS, KID! WHAT DO YOU THINK THEY’RE DOING ON THE STAN O’ WAR II? I’LL GIVE YOU A HINT: THE ANSWER’S ‘EACH OTHER’!”

mabel promptly ignores the rest of the letter entirely, and makes a GIANT response excitedly going “oh my gosh, you noticed, too??”, and listing everything romantic she’s ever noticed about them.

bill responds, filling in some gaps here and there, telling her about some incestuous stuff from 30+ years ago, pointing out things she missed, pointing out things he missed (“WOW, THEY DID WHAT? TALK ABOUT NEEDING TO GET A ROOM, YEESH.”)

they become stancest gossip buddies from there. mabel fujopills him in other regards (bill never thought he’d watch a show called “ouran highschool host club”, much less at the request of a 13 year old who thinks the pair of twins kissing would be hot/cute, but hey, afterlife’s full of surprises, ain’t it?) but his main love is and always will be stancest

they eventually become close enough and the theraprism staff trusts them enough to get interdimensional phone call privileges. any time anything happens mabel calls him and goes “oh my gosh, you’ll NEVER guess what just happened!” and they gossip for like an hour

stan and ford are completely clueless as to what’s going on at all. i like to imagine they find out eventually but it takes awhile LMAO

[glo0b]

~Cooking With Love~

(I do not own the art or character)

Content: Sebek x F!Yuu, other ocs are in this and as well as the other first years.

Tw: Some NSFW mentions, this was meant to be a nice fluff cooking fic but my depraved mind can't stop

word count: 2081

note: This took me FOREVER. I kept stopping and continuing so it might not be the best.

“Oh look, the Culinary Crucible sign ups are out again, maybe I could sign up to be a judge.” The five Ramshackle residents were walking down the halls of NRC, heading off to lunch like usual until Felix pointed out the Culinary Crucible sign ups. “Nya, I nearly died last time from Lilia’s cooking” Grim sat on Yuu’s head, it was his favorite spot since her hair was so fluffy. “How did Silver survive all those years with him? Perhaps it made his stomach stronger, I should test that out later, Mumble Mumble” There Donnie went with his evil scientist thoughts again and pulling out his notebook with info about everyone in the school, honestly how could that boy not be best friends with Rook at this point.

Yuu picked up the small paper that was stapled to the cork board, she noticed two familiar names sketched in pen on the parchment. “Hm looks like Floyd and Sebek would be the ones cooking. You may want to reconsider that thought, Felix.” Yuu couldn’t lie, she was slightly excited to see what Floyd and Sebek could do but also terrified of what the food would turn into. She did know a bit of both of their skill sets too. “That damn Eel? Jeeze I already gotta deal with his ass in the Basketball club! I bet he’d poison the food if he could!” Balik groans at the thought of having to see that wicked eel’s face cook for her. “Oh hush! Hmm, maybe I should sign up to be a judge.” Yuu quickly pushed away her fearful thoughts and signed the paper. “If you get a stomach ache from their food don’t come crying to me, henchmen!”

The thought of Sebek cooking for her was on Yuu’s mind all day. She giggled softly and smiled at the thought which started to freak her friends out a bit. “Yuu has been a little too bubbly than usual.” Epel bit into his BBQ, finally able to enjoy it since Vil or Rook weren’t nearby. “I scanned Yuu earlier and her heart rate seems to be more elevated than normal!” Ortho spoke, not eating since he didn’t need food but he still could eat it in a way since Idia gave him a new update! “I couldn’t smell any potions on her breath or anything so it could be something mental.” Jack was clueless to what could have happened to their sweet friend. “Do you think someone cursed her!? I’ll get revenge for Yuu!” Deuce looked like he was about to punch someone. “Wha- no! Who could possibly want to hurt Yuu? Let’s just ask Yuu what happened when she grabs her food.” Finally Ace was actually using his head to think, which if they weren't worried about Yuu, would have freaked the group out even more. "Alright, I'll calm down." Yuu grabbed her food and made her way to the rest of the first years with the other four behind her. Yuu places her tray down and sits next to Ace. “Hello big sis-” Before poor Ortho could greet Yuu he was interrupted by a very concerned Deuce. “Are you ok!? Did someone curse you?! Did you finally snap!?” Ace face palms. “Real nice on staying calm, Deuce.” Yuu raises her brow in suspicion but keeps her sweet smile. “Oh? What’s this now?” The first year group looks back at each other before Epel speaks up. “We’re just concerned since you’ve been acting a little off today….” The other Ramshackle residents finally joined the first years. “That’s just because she’s excited about being a judge for the upcoming Culinary crucible.” Donnie sits next to Ortho while Balik, Felix, and Grim sit next to or across from Yuu. “Really, you aren't getting it? Here’s another hint, loud knight of Diasomnia.” Small ‘Oooohs’ escape the boys’ lips as Donnie explains the reason behind Yuu's state.

Yuu covers her face in embarrassment. “That’s…not the reason..” Balik stabs her food with her fork repeatedly. “Really? Jeeze I can’t tell which one of you is more dense.” Felix rubs the back of his neck nervously. “Yeah, I gotta agree with Balik here.” Ortho stands up- well floats off the ground in excitement. “Maybe we could get you two together! Big brother was playing a game with the same premise the other day!”. “I don’t think that would work. The only thing that guy seems to think about is Malleus just like the only thing Grim thinks about is fancy tuna.” Ace snickers as he looks over at Grim devouring a can of tuna in Yuu’s lap. “Nya?! Hey!” Yuu glares at Ace and he stops right away. “That’s a really sweet idea, Ortho, but I’m not sure it’s the best idea right now.” Ortho looks slightly disappointed but nods his head in understatement. “Ok big Sis! I’ll still make a plan though!” 

The first years continue to talk but soon lunch comes to an end. “Man, I got P.E next. I better go now so I can get changed.” Felix whines as he grabs his empty tray and leaves. Everyone else starts to get up as well and leave for their classes. Yuu holds Grim in her arms as she walks with Ace, Deuce, and Donnie. “Oooh~ We got Alchemy next” Donnie smirks knowing he’ll get an easy 100%. “Don’t act so smug just because you’ve got slightly better grades than us!” Grim kicks his little feet causing Donnie to laugh his unsettling clown-like laugh. “Slightly? Oh please, you’ve gotten Ds and Cs on every test from Professor Crewel!” Donnie’s smirk grows even bigger as he knows Grim can’t make a well backed up argument. hours pass and classes slowly finish up for the day. “Yawn I really wish P.E didn’t kick my ass.” Felix rubs his sore arms. “Maybe it’s just because you’re weak and have little muscle on your bones.” Felix glares at Balik. “Be quiet, will you! You’re hurting my ears!” Grim interrupts their arguing before it could get any more heated. The two glare at each other before shutting up. “Hey, isn't the Culinary Crucible supposed to start tomorrow?” Donnie quickly changes the subject to make sure Balik and Felix don’t start arguing again. “Huh? Oh, yeah. It’s meant to be taking place before lunch, I think.”. Grim pouts. “Why can’t I get free food too! No fair!” Yuu giggles at Grim’s whines. The five reach their dorm and soon settle in for the night awaiting the brand new day full of opportunities to come. A certain half fae walks past the school cork board covered in flyers for clubs and what not, he looks down at the Culinary Crucible sheet. “So she has signed up to be a judge….I’LL DO MORE THAN MY VERY BEST FOR BOTH THE YOUNG MASTER AND YUU!” Sebek hurries his way back to Diasomnia so he can return to his job of guarding Malleus.

================================================

Morning comes without fail, birds chirp on cue as the sun rises with its natural beauty. Sebek was out doing his morning jogs before he had to head off to the Culinary Crucible. Sebek had originally signed up so he could learn to cook for his liege but when he found out Yuu was going to be one of the judges he felt even more determined to master the practice of the culinary arts. ‘I have to be able to cook for my future partner!’ That’s what the little voice in his head kept telling him plus Lilia said a good boyfriend should be able to cook for his partner when they’re sick or tired. Sebek finishes his morning jogs and heads inside of Diasomnia to wash off all the sweat on his body. As the cold water hits his body he thinks about how the Culinary Crucible could possibly go. He did learn a bit from Yuu when all the first years were at Ramshackle for a studie night which somehow turned into a small party. Sebek couldn’t help but blush when he remembered how Yuu’s soft hands guided him on how to cut an onion or when he burnt most of the vegetables Yuu just simple laughed it off with a reassuring smile. “How could a human like that make me feel like this….”. Oh Yuu’s soft hands, he just can’t stop thinking about them. All he wants is to have them trail along his body and wrap around his hard- “I must stop thinking about such things of Yuu! I need to get ready!” 

Sebek finishes his shower and gets dressed but not before gelling up his hair like he always does. This man went through almost two jars of gel each week, if Sam didn’t somehow magically have everything in stock Sebek would have been stuck with his natural hair. Sebek quickly checks the time. “On time as always.” And with that Sebek leaves to head off to the Culinary Crucible.

================================================

All of Ramshackle’s (living) residents were sitting in the courtyard talking. It was their free time before lunch so Donnie started making bets “Ok, 10$ says Sebek burns it to ash.” Donnie rolls his eyes at Felix’s bet. “Oh please, he’s not Lilia. Althouuuugh, 5$ says he makes it too dry or too bland to eat.” Yuu couldn’t help but laugh “Wow, you really don’t have faith in him? How about 100$ says Sebek makes something that I’ll enjoy.” Both Felix and Donnie’s eyes widen “Henchman, are you feeling ok!?” Even Grim and Balik looked shocked “Yuu is making bets?!” Balik dropped her cool guy act from pure shock. “We don’t even have that kind of money! Crowley doesn’t pay us shit!” Yuu smirks at Donnie’s comment and shrugs her shoulders. “Well~ I just have a lot of faith in Sebek, I guess. Plus I should probably join in on the fun shouldn’t I?” “I guess you do seem to like him a lot.” Balik plainly states. “Seems?? Those two are head over heels for each other!” Donnie throws his arms up in the air in frustration. “We’ll just have to wait and see who the winner of the bet is.” Yuu smiles knowingly. “Nya, I’m going to buy so much tuna with this bet!” Donnie rolls his eyes at Grim’s gluttonous statement before looking down at his watch “Looks like we only have a few minutes till next period.” Everyone lets out a small groan before saying their goodbyes and parting for their next classes. ==============================================

Yuu sat comfortable in the judge’s chair with Idia to her left and Trey to her right. Sebek set a bowl full of chicken pho before her with shaky hands. He looked so nervous, which seemed so unlike him. Once Idia and Trey also reserved a bowl of the chicken pho Yuu took a small spoon full. She looked up at the nervous half fae man in front of her and put the spoon to her lips…..Woah! The chicken had a melt in your mouth texture and the broth was so flavorful! Yuu’s eyes opened in shock as she let out a small moan from the amazing dish. After the other two finished it was time for the results. Yuu was so proud of Sebek, he obviously worked super hard on the dish. Yuu happily held up the sign that had the number ten written on it. “Amazing~! I loved it!”. Trey held up a ten sign as well while Idia held up a nine sign. A big grin spread across Sebek’s face as he saw the high ranking signs, he quickly bowed. “Thank you!”  ================================================

“WHAT!?” Like they planned this Felix, Balik, Donnie, and Grim all yelled in unison. “But how!?” Donnie was still in disbelief, how did Sebek do such a good job!? “My tuuuuuuuna!” Grim whined as his dreams of buying tuna with the bet money went down the drain. “Oh hush, I’ll buy you some tuna.” Grim’s ears pop up at the mention of Yuu buying him tuna. “I guess you get the money then.” Felix lets out a sigh before handing Yuu the money. “Thank you! Now remember next time not to test my intuition~” Yuu chuckled to herself. “Yeah, yeah, whatever and maybe next time we can get to taste this ‘amazing food’.” Balik still doubted Sebek of all people could cook such a good meal. “Yeah maybe…..” Yuu remembered the creamy, rich broth and melt in your mouth chicken, maybe she would have to cook for Sebek some time? Maybe a cooking date? Who knows, there’s so much time in life when you cook with love~!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

You have made it! Thank you for reading! I hope you liked it, it took me VERY long to make this. Mental health didn't help much lol. Make sure to get plenty of rest and to drink water dear reader!

[wrenwrights]

Konig Headcanons Part 2 (Nothing Is Perfect)

Since yesterday I went into my Konig headcanons (Here), I figured today would be the perfect day to delve into what Konig would be like in a relationship. And dare I say, dear reader, I am so excited to write this post and my fic later. I've fallen in love with this story, and I'm on a roll that can't be stopped!

I'd like to note before beginning that this is for my fic and not in any way cannon in the Call Of Duty lore. Enjoy the headcanons, dear reader, and let me know your own Konig headcanons in the comments. Does he like to bake you sweets and cook you dinner? Or do you enjoy the darker part of Konig, who'll clamp a collar around your neck and call you a good girl/boy? Truly, I'm curious cause I like both of these headcanons.

***

In the first days or even weeks of your relationship, Konig would be slightly standoffish, almost cold, and non-talkative. Sure, Konig is a Colonel; he knows how to speak his mind, but that's strictly work. When it comes to talking about his emotions, especially romantic feelings, Konig is lost at sea, especially when it comes to you, the object of his affection. He'd been in the military since he was 17 and though he wasn't completely inexperienced, he was practically clueless about romance. He wants to tell you that he thinks you're pretty at breakfast, he wants to help you with all of that paperwork on your desk from the last mission, but he doesn't know how to do these things. He's spent the last twenty years or so in the military making internal scripts and building walls to make his job easier, but there was no script for you. He didn't know how to tell you through touch, afraid you'd be uncomfortable or he'd hurt you with his massive size.

So Konig lets his actions speak for him; he'll bring coffee to your room, grab half of those manilla folders on your desk, and pray you have a pen that's not out of ink or a pencil that's not broken. You don't, but that's fine, Konig keeps one in his pocket when in the office. You'll come back to base after a long mission, and Konig is there to help you clean and sort your gear, to help you get to the infirmary if you are injured. Konig is a romantic at heart, a love-at-first-sight kind of person, and even though he doesn't know how to say he loves you, he tells you with every little action.

Now, as much as we'd all like dating to be all sweet touches and words of affirmation, dear reader, that's not reality. Every relationship has its ups and downs, its quirks and kinks (no pun intended), and your relationship with Konig is no different. He's cocky and overprotective. While the cockiness doesn't bother you too much in the office (We'll get onto the battlefield in a minute), his overprotectiveness certainly does. He'll follow you through the halls, your ginormous, threatening shadow that scares off anyone who looks at you for a little too long. And god forbid if anyone speaks to you a little too flirtatiously. That annoys him and makes him frustrated and a little angry with you for not seeing what he does.

You get into arguments in private about it, the both of you are frustrated for different reasons. You see nothing wrong with your colleagues discussing work/after-work life. What else are you gonna do on base? Konig doesn't like being around people; he prefers to be alone and not wander the halls of base more than he has to, but he feels like he has to be near you and protect you. Maybe he's a little spent- his social battery is empty, and he doesn't know how to tell you this. But he does know how to be frustrated.

"You truly don't see what they're doing? How they look at you? Scheiße! You're not that blind Schatz!

The battlefield is where it all comes to a head; in an effort to keep you safe, Konig has been giving the dangerous missions away or putting you on missions with him. You'd certainly noticed Konig's presence in your missions. He'd be cocky, pulling rank often to keep you behind him and on the sidelines of the battlefield. You'd noticed how work was beginning to slow down, missions coming in less frequently, but you hadn't put two and two together. It's Horangi who really opens your eyes.

"The Colonel is probably been giving you the greenlight operations,"

"What?"

"I mean... maybe not, but also probably,"

You rarely came home angry, but you'd arrived on base fuming- your time off base only led to your anger festering, a raging fire that was about to hit Konig full force. He wasn't in the armourie waiting for you today, probably being ever the good soldier and doing his paperwork. Fuck his paperwork; he'd messed with your career and strained your friendships. Though you didn't know if he felt the same, you loved this big and often sweet man, and he'd hurt you. He didn't trust you to take care of yourself.

He was technically your superior, and you would never come into your superior's office by slamming the door open and kicking it closed- but you weren't in a very respectful mood and slamming doors helped to fuel the fire in your belly. Konig was certainly surprised. You were normally a calm person, and here you were, visibly raging and still in your tac-pants.

"Are you alright, Schatz?"

"You fucked with my job,"

"Wha-"

"You tried to scare off all of my friends,"

"Liebl-"

"Fuck you,"

You'd turned to leave, to stomp out of his office and let the door slam closed forever. Konig's heart slammed in his chest, his veins turning icey, afraid you'd never speak to him again if you walked out of that door. He was right; of course, you were done with his behavior and planned on not acknowledging his presence ever again. No, Konig couldn't let that happen. But he didn't know how to tell you, didn't have a script for this in his head, and he'd reacted instead of communicated.

He'd wrapped his arms around your waist and practically threw you into the air, cradling you against his chest, and his large hands gripped your thighs as they wrapped around his waist. Konig had never touched you like this, had never grabbed you outside of a few training exercises (he won't do those with you anymore, afraid he'd crush you by accident), and he was frozen in terror now. Afraid of what you'd do, of how you'd react. You were looking him in the eye, your own eyes wide and mouth slightly agape.

You had known Konig was bigger than you, hell, you'd seen the damage and destruction he could do firsthand- but it had never occurred to you just HOW big Konig was. He'd picked you up like you were nothing, and he looked terrified. He was shaking just slightly, his eyes scrunched in a look you knew well as anxiousness. Oh, you hated it when he looked like that; it made your heartstrings tug because you didn't want Konig hurt, even when you were mad at him. You couldn't help but lean into him and caress his cheek, pressing your forehead against his covered one. This was the closest you'd ever been to one another, and damn did it feel good. He was warm, and safe, and strong, and you felt so content in his arms.

"Please," you'd whisper, thumb stroking his cheek.

"Schatz-"

You shook your head, taking a deep, rattling breath to calm the tears that, embarrassingly, threatened to flow.

"Trust me, please,"

"I do." He'd insist.

"You don't." Your thumb began stroking his cheek, the fabric of his sniper's hood a soft, warm cotton. "Please. This won't work if you don't trust me." That took Konig's breath away, and he had to swallow the pleas that threatened to spill from his lips. You trusted him to take care of himself, maybe he needed to do the same. He'd seen to much death, had been the cause of so much destruction, and you were the one good thing in Konig's life, how could he possibly trust you to protect yourself? How do you trust him?

"How?" he'd breathed it, whispered it against your lips as he shook. Why was he even shaking? You did that to Konig, made him vulnerable, brought out the gentleness in the giant that Konig was. He couldn't be rough with you.

"I'll learn," You murmured, your thumb stroking his cheek. "I trust you enough to try."

Konig was speechless, stunned as you leaned into his touch, as you were vulnerable with him. You loved him. There was love in your voice, in your touch, and Konig felt safe, warm with you in his arms.

"Okay," he whispered, "I can do that. We can do that, Schatz," his doubts slipped away as his heart began pounding in his chest. He was nervous. Konig had never let go like this before, but that was okay because you would be there to help him.

Okay, this isn't all of you and Konig's headcanons but this post is becoming way too long and I have to get to work. I'll make a part 2 for tomorrows post. Thank you, dear reader, if you made it this far and I hope you enjoyed! I hope you see you tomorrow.

[pineapple-hoseok]

Happy Birthday!

Pairing: Yoongi x f!reader

Genre: A whole lot of fluff, soft Yoongi, 13+

Warnings: Some cuss words and Yoongi being a lovesick puppy

Word Count: 3.7k (wow that’s the longest one shot I’ve ever written)

Summary: It’s your birthday and Yoongi doesn’t know what to get you. He has a huge crush on you and he wants everything to be perfect.

---

Your birthday was tomorrow. You knew it, your best friend knew, the boys knew it, Yoongi knew it. How could Yoongi forget one of the most important days of the year? Well, it wasn’t as important as everyone was hyping it up to be, but it was for Yoongi. Especially because he had the biggest crush on you since Jimin introduced you to him and the others over a year ago. And he was going to use this day to finally tell you how he felt, using the advice Jimin gave him.

The only problem was, he didn’t know what gift to get you. You were supposed to be meeting up at their dorm tomorrow afternoon so they could celebrate with you and Minah, one out of two of your best friends, and he still had no idea what to buy.

Even as he stood in the middle of the shopping mall about a mile from the dorm, he was clueless and running out of time. So he did what he thought of as a last resort and dialed a number.

The boy on the other line answered with a tired ‘Hello?’, making it clear to Yoongi that he had just woken up from a nap. “Jimin-ah, I need your help.”

“Are you trying to find a gift for Y/N but you have no idea what to get her so you’re calling me to see if I can give you an idea of what to buy since I’m her best friend and I know her better than she knows herself?” That left Yoongi speechless.

Jimin knew of the older boy’s crush on you, hell, all the boys did. Even Minah, who was also one of the densest people in all of Korea, knew. Everyone could tell by the way Yoongi’s mood would lift every time you walked into the room, his obvious attempts of getting closer to you on movie nights, spending hours in his studio showing you songs he’d been working on, even letting you hear him sing after he swore he didn’t have the ability to. And when you told him you loved his songs and his voice, he felt his heart do a backflip in his chest. But somehow, you didn’t notice.

“How the fuck did you know that?” Jimin rolled his eyes so hard, Yoongi could practically hear it.

“You’re so easy to read when it comes to her, hyung.” The Busan boy sighed, sitting up in his bed once he realized he wasn’t getting any more sleep. “You already know Y/N’s really into photography, and I just happen to know her camera just broke. She needs a new one.”

Yoongi’s eyes widened, wondering to himself how he didn’t think of that before. “Thanks Jiminie, I owe you.” Jimin mumbled a simple ‘hell yeah you do’ and hung up the phone, but not without reminding Yoongi how much he loved him. The older male externally gagged, but internally smiled.

He knew you would never accept a brand new camera from him, but he was going to force you to take it, since he knew how much photography meant to you. He couldn’t live with himself if he knew you couldn’t do the thing you loved, and that he had a way to help. So he walked into Best Buy and made a beeline to the camera section. He knew absolutely nothing about cameras, but he was lucky to have a worker show him the best one for taking 4K pictures. Yoongi thought you’d really like an upgrade from your previous camera, which was kinda crappy considering that you got it for cheap.

Oh yeah, Yoongi thought, Y/N is definitely going to kill me. The boy, who usually kept his feelings to himself, found himself smiling at the thought of what your reaction would be. You’d definitely give him the worst death glare you could muster up, but he knew you would be actually trying your hardest not to cry. So as he swiped his credit card in the card reader, his excitement to give you this gift only grew.

Yoongi sat at his desk later that night, ignoring the calls of all the boys and their questioning of the bag he had in his hands. He pulled out a piece of paper and a pen, getting to work on the second half of his gift for you.

Meanwhile, you were laying on Minah’s bed while staring up at the ceiling, your best friend sitting on her desk chair. You had no idea what she was doing, but you didn’t question it. Everyone seemed to be keeping something from you lately. First, Minah begged you to sleep over, then you caught her talking to Jimin on the phone about god knows what. Now, she was telling you that the two of you were going over to the boys’ dorm because she forgot her favorite sweater there.

You fished your phone out of your pocket and texted the only person you thought you could get information out of.

If Hoseok didn’t know anything, that means they probably kept him out of it. He was probably the worst liar you had ever met, he couldn’t keep a secret to save his life. But you dropped the subject as soon as Minah stood up from her desk chair. She gestured for you to move over so she could get in the bed too. Back in Busan, you, Minah, and Jimin had been sleeping in the same bed since you all were in diapers, so this wasn’t weird at all to either of you.

“Minah?” You spoke in a soft voice, causing the girl to turn to look at you.

“What’s up?”

You bit your lip, thinking for a second. “What if everyone forgot my birthday? The only person that has said anything about it was Hoseok.”

Minah had to keep herself from smiling. “I’m sure everyone remembers, there’s still a half hour until your actual birthday. Don’t worry, okay?”

You took her word for it, trying your best to calm your racing thoughts. For the next half hour, you and Minah talked about memories you both had from middle school, including the time the two of you drew all over Jimin’s face in middle school when he fell asleep in class. He was still holding a grudge against the two of you for that.

Before you knew it, the alarm clock on Minah’s bedside read twelve am.

Minah jumped up and wrapped her arms around you, screaming ‘happy birthday!’ so loudly in your ear that you were sure her neighbors heard her. You laughed, the girl’s strength knocking you down on the bed while you hugged her back.

“Thank you, now get off of me!” As soon as she did, your phone rang. It was your parents calling you from Busan to wish you a happy birthday. You thanked them, making sure to tell them that you were gonna visit soon before you hung up. Other than that, you had no more calls. Not even from the person you wanted to call you the most, Yoongi.

Everyone knew about your crush on Yoongi, the two of you were really bad at hiding your feelings. But apparently you weren’t, because neither you nor Yoongi knew how the other felt.

Every time you hung out with him and the boys, you always found yourself smiling more than usual whenever he talked to you. And the moments you two spent in his studio listening to a song he wanted to show you only made your stomach fill with butterflies. He seemed to get you more than anyone else did, not even Minah and Jimin. You also couldn’t forget how gentle he always was with you, despite what people have said about him having a cold exterior. Whenever you had a movie night with the boys, Yoongi would always end up sitting next to you, even sharing his blanket with you when you got cold. He’d scold you whenever he caught you speaking badly about yourself, telling you never to do that again. Whenever you were upset and needed comfort, he always let you call him no matter what time of night it was. You couldn’t help but fall for him, which is why you felt disappointed when you didn’t get a text or call from him at midnight.

Your lips turned down in a small frown, but Minah didn’t notice. Instead, she explained that the two of you should sleep so you could go to the boys’ dorm early in the afternoon. You turned onto your side, pulling the covers over your shoulder as you closed your eyes and let sleep take over you.

--

You woke up to the sound of a higher pitched male voice singing happy birthday. As your eyes opened, you noticed it was Jimin singing to you while holding a cupcake with a single candle in it, Minah smiling widely behind him. They gave you a second to sit up in Minah’s bed, a wide smile taking over your features. You closed your eyes, making a single wish before blowing out the candle on the cupcake Jimin was holding out for you. He set it on the nightstand, allowing you to jump into your best friend’s arms and thank him profusely. Jimin’s arms picked you up and lifted you off of the bed, spinning you around once before setting you down on the floor.

“Happy birthday, loser.” You laughed, reaching up to ruffle the boy’s hair.

“Yah, that’s noona to you.” You honestly didn’t care about honorifics, but you did it just to tease Jimin about your one year age difference like you always did. He rolled his eyes, pushing your hand away from him while you laughed even more.

“Now go brush your teeth and put on something nice after you shower, you stink.” Minah pushed you towards her bathroom, leaving you confused. If you guys were only going to the dorm to pick up her sweater, why did you need to wear something nice? At this point you learned not to question anything Minah said, so you just went along with it and started getting ready.

About an hour later, you were dressed in a black skirt and a matching black blouse that you found in Minah’s closet after you forgot your clothes at your house. All you did to your hair was brush it out and style it a little, but you liked the way the wavy style looked on you. Once you stepped out of the room, you found Jimin and Minah whispering about something, with Jimin briefly looking down at his phone.

After you cleared your throat to get their attention, they turned to look at you.

“Perfect, let’s go.” Jimin grabbed your hand and brought you over to the door, telling you to put on the black low top vans you came in before leading you and Minah to his car. Throughout the entire car ride to Bangtan’s apartment building, Minah kept bouncing excitedly in her seat. Jimin on the other hand, kept telling her to stop before he threw her out of his porsche.

Soon enough, the three of you arrived at the building, making your way up the familiar elevator before walking down the hall. You were about to put in the code to the front door before Jimin slid in front of you so he could do it himself. What a child.

He sent a quick text from his phone before putting in the door code. The lights were off inside the big apartment, and you wondered where the boys were. Were they all out and Jimin was the first one home? Dismissing the thought, you took your shoes off at the entrance and put on the slippers the boys got you a few months into your friendship with them. You were about to start looking for Minah’s sweater until all of a sudden, the lights turned on and six boys jumped up screaming.

“Surprise!” You would’ve fell on your ass if it wasn’t for Minah who caught you from behind, everyone laughing at your reaction. All around you were balloons and streamers in an array of colors, the entire living area of the dorm looking festive.

You started tearing up, your hand fanning your eyes as you looked around at the seven boys -- plus Minah -- that planned this surprise party for you.

“You guys did all of this for me?” They all nodded, all of them running over to hug you before you could burst into tears. You hugged all of them individually, each boy wishing you a happy birthday. Hoseok came up to you, wrapping his arms around you in a friendly hug. Aside from Jimin, Hoseok was the next boy you considered as one of your closest friends in Bangtan.

“I swear, Y/N, I didn’t know anything about this until an hour ago.” You laughed, hugging the boy tightly.

Next was Yoongi. He walked up to you with a smile on his face, holding his arms out for a hug. Your arms wrapped around his neck as his wrapped around your waist, your heart doing backflips and somersaults in your chest.

“I’m sorry I didn’t call you to say happy birthday at midnight, they took my phone so I couldn’t contact you and ruin the surprise,” He spoke, his lips right next to your ear making his soft voice send shivers through your body. You hugged him for a second longer than the other boys before pulling back from the hug.

“It’s okay, I wasn’t worried.” That was a lie, but you decided that Yoongi didn’t need to know that.

The two of you walked over to the living room where the rest of the party was, your body immediately taking a seat next to Seokjin when he offered you one of the switch remotes to play Mario Kart with him.

That’s how the party went for the next few hours. A Mario Kart tournament between you and your eight friends took up a lot of the time, but you ended up beating everyone. You knew all of them had let you win, because there was no way you could beat Seokjin, Jungkook, AND Taehyung. But you didn’t mind, you got a crown made out of paper as your prize.

At last, it was gift opening time. Everyone sat on the living room floor, letting you use the couch as your throne as you opened each gift.

“I told you guys not to get me anything.” You whined, earning a bunch of comments from the peanut gallery to shut up and open your gifts.

So that’s what you did, starting with a gift from Jungkook. He got you the new pair of vans you’ve been wanting and were telling him about last week. Taehyung got you a gucci necktie to match his, Hoseok got you a pin that says ‘I <3 New Zealand’ from when they visited the year before (which you laughed at), Seokjin got you an Eevee plushie to match his, Namjoon got you a copy of the book he was reading which you asked him for a while ago, and Jimin got you a signed cd of his single ‘Promise’. After each of the boys gave you their gifts, you hugged each of them and made sure to tell them how much you really liked everything.

Then Yoongi gave you his. It was in a wrapped box and it felt heavy. You prayed that he didn’t get you something expensive, after you specifically told everyone not to buy you anything expensive. But you carefully opened it anyway, the wrapping paper revealing the box of a brand new Canon camera. A chorus of surprised sounds came from everyone, your eyes widening while looking down at the box. This camera was a huge upgrade from the shitty one you had before, which broke after some random guy bumped into you while you were taking pictures one day.

“Min Yoongi, I’m gonna kill you.” You mustered the best death glare you could give him. If looks could kill, the boy would be six feet under by now.

“Well I’m not taking it back, and there’s no refunds or returns so you have to accept it.” He wore a smug smile on his face that you wanted so badly to wipe off completely. You would definitely murder him in his sleep later.

You set the box down next to you and sighed in defeat, going over to hug him too.

“Thank you, it really means a lot to me.” Your voice was soft as you thanked him, and you could feel him smile against your cheek. You were about to go back to your seat when Yoongi stopped you.

“Actually, there’s something else I have for you,” He looked around at the curious eyes of everyone staring up at him, “in private.”

This set off another chorus of ‘woah’s from all of the boys, Minah only snickering in the corner. After telling them all to shut up, Yoongi stood and gestured for you to follow him to his room. You stood and followed closely behind him, ignoring the stares you felt on the back of your head.

Yoongi led you into his room and closed the door behind him so you two would have privacy. Your heart was beating wildly in your chest, wondering why he brought you here.

“So I kinda wrote you a small note, and I didn’t want you to read it in front of everyone so I brought you here.” He reached into his back pocket and pulled out a folded piece of paper, handing it to you with red cheeks. You didn’t know how to react except for responding with a small ‘thank you’ before opening the note.

Dear Y/N,

I kinda feel like an idiot writing this letter to you, but I didn’t know how else to tell you. Okay I’m just gonna say it, I like you. Like really like you. I like spending time with you, whether it’s with the boys or alone, I like showing you the songs I’m working on, I like when you sit close to me on movie nights, I like when you smile and literally light up any room you walk into, I like how little strands of your hair fall into your eyes and you don’t even notice it, I like the way your dimples pop out every time you smile, I like everything about you. I really like the way I feel when I’m around you, like I get this tingly feeling in my stomach and I can feel my heart do little flips in my chest, and I just feel really happy when I’m around you. Everything in me just wants to keep you happy, because you look really beautiful when you smile, and your laugh is probably more contagious than Hoseok’s (and that’s saying a lot). My point is, I’m wearing my heart on my sleeve right now and I just wanted to ask you something.

P.S: Look back up at me when you’re done reading this.

You had tears in your eyes by the time you looked back up at a nervous Yoongi, his hands shoved in his front pockets to keep himself from fidgeting with them.

“Now that you know my feelings, will you please be my girlfriend?” Yoongi couldn’t tear his eyes away from yours, not until he heard your answer. Right now, he was giving his heart to you in hopes that you wouldn’t break it. He was revealing a vulnerable side of him that only you got to see, and that he had never shown anyone.

You smiled as a few tears slipped past your eyelids, which made Yoongi immediately go into panic mode.

“Oh shit, did I do something? I’m so sorry, I shouldn’t have done that-“ You cut him off by chuckling lightly, shaking your head.

“Shut up and kiss me, idiot.” Your hands reached up to rest on his cheeks, pulling his face closer to yours until your lips met his. Almost immediately, his hands rested on your waist, pulling your body closer to his.

The kiss lasted a little less than ten seconds before both of you hesitantly pulled back just enough to look at each other’s faces.

“Yes,” You spoke softly, causing a confused look to take over Yoongi’s face. Laughing lightly, you realized he completely forgot about his question. “I’ll be your girlfriend.”

Yoongi smiled his gummy smile that you absolutely adored, his arms wrapping around your waist to hug you again. The size of your smile mirrored his as your hands ran through his hair.

“You have no idea how long I’ve been waiting for this.” His head pulled back, leaning down to kiss you again. You broke the kiss after a second, though, much to his dismay.

“As much as I just want to kiss you all night, we have a crowd of people waiting for us outside.” Yoongi whined, only making you laugh more. But you were serious about going back out there, taking hold of his hand and walking back out of his room. The two of you walked hand in hand back to the living room, smiling at all of the surprised faces staring back at you.

“Finally!” Jimin called out, earning himself a slap on the back of the head from Seokjin. But everyone agreed with Jimin’s opinion, congratulating you and Yoongi.

You all decided to end the night with cake and a movie. Everyone called for you to pick the movie while Minah got up to grab the cake in the kitchen, so you picked ‘Toy Story 2’ again. They all started complaining, but you just smiled and pressed play on the screen.

Instead of sitting on the couch like you normally would’ve, you decided to sit on the floor in between Yoongi’s legs, leaning your back against his chest. You felt two strong arms wrap around your waist, looking back to see your now boyfriend looking back down at you with a smile on his face. Making sure no one was looking, you leaned up to quickly kiss his waiting lips before resting your head back on his shoulder, your arms resting on top of his.

This was officially the best birthday ever.

[babymetaldoll]

Spencer Reid first official Valentine's day (Spencer Reid/ Reader)

Requested: Nop

Summary: Spencer has no idea what to do for Valentine's Day. After all, he has never had a girlfriend before.

Category: Hardcore fluff

Warnings: Nope

Word count: 3,8K

Masterlist

A/N: Happy Valentine's day, everybody! Treat yourselves! Love yourselves and enjoy this fluff!! Love you all!!

February 7th. Quantico.

There are many things you can say about Spencer Reid. He is a genius. Has an IQ of 187, can read over 20 thousand words per minute. He has one of the most demanding and dangerous jobs in the world. He saves lives for a living.

And he has no idea what to do for Valentine's.

In his defense, he has never celebrated Valentine's day before, ever. In his entire life. And he is excited to share that special date with his girlfriend, (Y/N). But he has been pressuring himself so much in the last days, trying to find the most romantic plan humankind had ever seen. He is, in fact, going insane.

- "Hey lover boy,"- Morgan found Reid all alone in the bullpen, sipping his second cup of coffee of the day.

- "Are you ready for Valentine's?"- and the only answer Spencer could give his friend was a frustrated groan.

- "I'm taking that as a no"- Derek raised an eyebrow and sat on his friend's desk- "What is it?"

- "I just don't know what to do to make that day special for (Y/N),"- Spencer whispered- "We've been dating for a month, three days and..."- he took a look at his wristwatch- "Eleven hours. And I want our first Valentine's day together the most romantic day of her life."

Morgan widened his eyes and looked at his friend. He had always seen Reid as his kid brother, and he felt it was his duty to help him in life. Whether it was to help him overcome his fear of talking to girls, catching unsubs, questioning suspects, or getting drunk. Whatever Spencer needed him for, he was there. This wasn't going to be the exception.

- "What do you have in mind that might be special for her?"- Morgan whispered and took a look around. Prentiss and (Y/N) were just stepping out of the elevator with Garcia. The three of them stayed talking in the hall for a few minutes, giving Spencer time to answer.

- "Nothing I can think of seems good enough"- he whispered- "I need to find something that shows her how much she means. Movies and chocolates just won't do it."

Morgan nodded and looked at Reid. He was about to chuckle and tease him a little, just playing, when (Y/N) showed up next to them, with a huge grin.

- "Good morning, guys!"- she smiled at Derek and handed Spencer a small paper bag- "For your coffee, doctor."

- "Thank you."

Reid blushed and opened the bag. Inside there was a red velvet cupcake with little heart-shaped sprinkles on top. He stared at it, not knowing what to say. (Y/N) just giggled and walked to her desk.

Spencer and (Y/N) had been acting like teenagers since they started dating. It wasn't just the fact they were young, 'cos they were, both of them 27 and 25 years old respectively. It was how the two of them had been crazy in love with each other for the last two years, and neither of them had acted on it until Spencer nearly died of anthrax.

It's crazy how one of them had almost to die to realize it was time to face their feelings.

And now, they were finally dating.

Spencer had never been happier. No one who knew him could deny it. He would laugh all the time and make jokes with his friends. He never stayed at the BAU working extra hours anymore, 'cos now he and (Y/N) had a date almost every day when they weren't on a case.

Spencer had never felt this way. He had never thought he deserved to be this happy. That is why he was having such a hard time finding the perfect Valentine's gift for (Y/N).

He didn't just want to. His whole body felt he needed to show (Y/N) how much she meant for him in every way possible.

But he had never had a girlfriend before, and he had never celebrated Valentine's day. Needless to say, he felt he was clueless.

February 12th.

- "Hey, Pretty Ricky"- Morgan sat with Reid on the jet back home after a case and handed him a handwritten paper.

- "What's this?"- Spencer furrowed his eyes and took a look around. (Y/N) had fallen asleep talking with Prentiss at the other side of the jet.

- "I've been thinking about what we talked about the other day, about Valentine's day. And I think I've got the answer."- Reid took a look at the paper and frowned. An address and an hour.

- "Be there tomorrow at that time, and you'll get all the help you need"- Spencer stared at Morgan, confused.

- "At Rossi's? Why?"

- "Trust me, kid. The man is an institution of romance. If there's someone who can help you surprise (Y/N), that's him".

Reid wasn't comfortable thinking Morgan had been talking about this love life with someone else. Then again, he was pretty excited he had a love life after all those years. And, if Rossi could help him, Spencer couldn't really say no. After all, he needed all the help he could use.

- "Are you ok?"- (Y/N) asked Spencer and cut him a short nervous smile as she drove him to his apartment after landing. He had been acting a little off for the last couple of days, and she still couldn't figure out what was going on.

- "Yes. Just tired"- he answered, almost under breath.

- "Do you wanna hang out? Maybe pizza, beer... any movie or documentary you might like to see?- but Spencer just shook his head and kept looking outside.

- "I'm sorry, I'm tired after the case."

- "Sure, that's ok."- (Y/N) sighed and kept her eyes on the road.

- "I'm"- Spencer tried to explain- "I am really just tired, there's nothing wrong or weird going on."

- "Yeah, of course"- (Y/N) smiled again and continued driving- "You'd tell me if there was anything wrong."

- "Yeah! definitely."

As a profiler, (Y/N) knew Spencer was hiding something. As his girlfriend, she had to pretend she didn't know she was lying. She trusted Reid, so she wanted to think he was honestly affected after the case. They hadn't slept well those days, either of them. It had been a hard couple of days. Maybe Spencer just needed to rest. Perhaps in the morning, he was going to be his regular adorable self again.

- "Call me when you get home, ok?"- Spencer leaned in and kissed (Y/N) lips goodbye as soon as she parked outside his building. (Y/N) nodded and kissed him again. His hands cupped her face in a second, holding her close to him for a moment longer.

- "Are you sure you don't wanna eat something?"- (Y/N) murmured against his lips.

- "Yeah... about that... I don't know if it's too obvious or if I have to ask, but... would you like to go out with me on Valentine's day?"

Spencer was nervous to ask his girl out. He couldn't be more adorable even if he tried. And (Y/N) knew it.

- "I already had plans for that day"- (Y/N) shrugged and shook her head

- "Really? What? Why, I mean, I understand...?"- Spencer wasn't even sure what he was saying. He wasn't waiting for that answer.

- "Yeah, I saved the date over a month ago, to spend it with my boyfriend, Reid"- and she stuck out her tongue to him, giggling- "You should've seen your face. Are you ok?"

- "I hate you"- Reid bit his lips and chuckled

- "No, you don't,"- (Y/N) joked and kissed his lips for a second- "So, see you tomorrow?"

- "Yes"- Spencer kissed her one more time, and this time, he bit her lips as he slowly moved apart.

- "So next date is our Valentine's date?"- she pouted- "No cuddles until then?"- and Spencer shook his head- "You are no fun."

- "You are gonna have to wait"- he kissed her again, this time a little slower, feeling how she kept trying to move closer to him from the driver's seat.

- "I don't wanna wait."

- "It will be worth the wait. I promise"- Spencer looked at her with such love, (Y/N) held her breath, unable to talk. She just nodded- "Call me when you get home, ok?"

- "Yes"- Spencer kissed her one last time and got off the car, whispering to himself.

- "Ok, now I really need a good plan."

Remember Spencer had been pressuring himself, trying to find the most romantic plan humankind had ever seen?

Now the pressure was massive, 'cos he had actually told (Y/N) he had an incredible plan.

- "Why did I have to open my mouth?!"

February 13th. At Rossi's.

- "Kid, here is the best advice you've ever heard for love"- Rossi poured a glass of red wine for himself and Spencer as the two of them stood in his kitchen. David was about to start a cooking lesson, and Reid was prepared to take notes. Literally. He was holding a pen and a notebook.

- "You will always know nothing"- Reid stopped writing after the second word and looked at Rossi, already annoyed.

- "What?"

- "Sorry, kid. I know you love to learn, and that's a good thing 'cos you will always learn something new when it comes to love. You will never fully understand it. Look at me, three marriages in, and I still have no idea what I'm doing."

- "I was promised a talk with a master of romance. I feel disappointed."- Spencer complained, and David chuckled- "No offense, Rossi, but I was sure you were going to know a lot more than you are telling me right now."

- "The things I know, I can not teach you. You don't learn things about love. You learn about the people you love. That's why you will never know it all. Sure. I can tell you the basics: flowers, restaurants, presents. But the key for romance is knowing the woman you love."

Reid just nodded in silence and tried to make a mental list of everything he knew about (Y/N). That was a lot of information.

Rossi smiled, thinking when he returned to the BAU, he never imagined he was ever going to end up having a kid. Because that's how he felt about Spencer sometimes. Like he was his kid, and he loved to teach him things he wished someone had told him. For example, how to surprise your girlfriend on Valentine's day.

- "The second most important advice I am going to give you today is this: you always cook with the same wine you drink"- Rossi raised his glass and sipped it- "Perfecto! Now let's make risotto!

After that evening with Rossi, Spencer felt a lot more confident about his Valentine's plans. He would cook dinner for his girlfriend, which was (according to what he had talked with David) one of the most romantic things anyone could do for their partner. And considering (Y/N) had always cooked for Spencer, even when they were just friends, he wanted to make her feel as loved as he felt each time she cooked his favorite dish for him.

But also, after cooking and having dinner with Rossi, Spencer was feeling a little drunk. That wine tasting had been a little.... excessive, maybe? Four bottles of wine didn't seem disproportionate at the moment, but Spencer realized it might have been too much on the cab back home.

- "Hello, gorgeous"- because suddenly, Spencer was doing his first drunk dial- "What are you doing up so late?"

- "Spencer, are you ok? It's two in the morning. Where are you?"

- "I'm on my way back home, and I was thinking about you and all the fun we are going to have tomorrow. But tomorrow is now"

(Y/N) sat on her bed and scratched her head confused, and still half asleep.

- "What are you talking about, honey?"

- "Tomorrow is Valentine's day, but tomorrow is right now!"

- "Spencer Walter Reid, are you drunk?"

- "No! no way! Why are you middle naming me for?"- his voice was a pitch higher as he tried to deny the truth.

- "Where were you?"

- "At Rossi's"- Reid couldn't lie. Not only because he was drunk and there was no way he could come up with any weird story, but also because he couldn't lie to (Y/N).

- "We had a wine tasting and a long conversation about what went south with each one of his relationships. Statistically, that man should be studied. I wanted to offer myself to do a little research until I remembered you said sometimes people don't share their feelings to be analyzed, but because they need to take them off their chest. So I just nodded and told him he is an amazing person. Which he is! Did you know he is friends with Ringo Star?

- "No way!"- (Y/N) tried not to laugh, but drunk Spencer was too amusing- "What else did you talk about?"

- "You"- Spencer confessed and sighed- "We talked about you, and how wonderful you are"

(Y/N) nearly choked when she heard Spencer saying those words so easily. Like it wasn't something it had taken years for him to confess. Like she hadn't waited years for him to tell her how he felt for her.

- "Are you in a cab?"- she asked and changed the subject.

- "No, I just got off the cab... hold it"- Spencer thanked the driver and paid for the ride- "And I am about to walk into my building."

- "Good! so, tomorrow, what's the plan?"

- "Dinner"- Spencer chuckled- "Here, with me."

- "Are you going to cook for me, Spencer Reid?"

- "I don't know. Maybe I'll cover myself in Nutella and give myself to you for dessert."

(Y/N) didn't know what to answer at that. Not only Spencer had never said anything as bold as that, but... they hadn't even had sex yet. And now (Y/N) couldn't stop thinking about licking Nutella off Spencer's body. Hopefully, that was indeed their Valentine's plan.

- "You should go to bed"- that was all (Y/N) could answer- "And I'll see you tomorrow... at what time?"

- "Six, princess. I'll be waiting for you at six"- Princess. That was new too.

- "Ok, honey. Drink lots of water when you get home."

- "I'm home!"- Spencer announced, and (Y/N) heard his keys falling on what she hoped was a table.

- "Great, now drink water, brush your teeth and sleep well. Ok, honey?"

- "Yes, sunshine!"- (Y/N) giggled and shook her head.

- "Goodnight, Spencer. I'll see you tomorrow."

- "At six, bub"- he repeated.

- "Yes. I'll be there at six. Goodnight"

- "Sleep tight, love of my life"- (Y/N) giggled and sighed. She really didn't know how to answer those words. (Y/N) knew Spencer was drunk, which was the only explanation for his cheesy nicknames... cheesy nicknames she loved.

- "Sleep tight, my sweet prince,"- she whispered and hung down the phone.

That had been interesting. Now, how was (Y/N) going to shake off the image of Spencer covered in Nutella, asking her to lick him?

Seriously, how?

February 14th

Spencer Reid was slightly hungover, and the conversation he had had with (Y/N) on the phone the night before was a blur in his mind.

None of that stopped him from getting up early to clean the house and going to the grocery store to get everything he needed to cook dinner for his girlfriend.

But not only that, but he also sent her flowers to her house early morning and breakfast from her favorite coffee shop.

Reid had never had a girlfriend for Valentine's day, and he finally had someone to share everything he always dreamt of doing on February 14th.

Spencer Reid was a hopeless romantic. No one could ever doubt that. No one actually knew that either. It was a well-kept secret between him and (Y/N).

- "Thank you for the flowers"- (Y/N) texted and stared at the gigantic bouquet on her table- "And breakfast."

- "Dinner is going to be way better,"- Spencer answered and smiled, pleased with his romantic techniques. Rossi would be proud. He took a mental note to write Rossi a thank you note if things went well that night.

Of course, things were going to be ok. Why wouldn't they? All Spencer had to do was keep calm, cook, and have a great time with his girlfriend.

Around four, Spencer started getting ready. First, he set the table for two, in the most romantic way he could, after googling "romantic table setting for two at home." The fact he had actually googled something would have been enough for (Y/N) to feel the most special woman on earth for Spencer. But she wasn't going to find out about that yet.

Spencer cooked dessert and made sure the champagne was cold. Then, he set some appetizers: Strawberries covered in chocolate to help the brain produce serotonin. And watermelon and prosciutto skewers. Spencer knew watermelon contains citrulline, which increases nitric oxide levels in the body, relaxing blood vessels and speeding up circulation to produce arousal. Basically, he was making sure blood was getting to all the right places, just in case.

After that, Reid took a long shower. He wasn't waiting to get laid that night. But a part of him needed to be prepared. He was getting his house ready for romance, after all.

Once he was dressed, combed (sort of), and ready, Reid started cooking. First, he chopped all the veggies, settled everything he would need, and read (again) the notes he had taken from Rossi's cooking class.

- "First, heat the extra virgin olive oil in a medium heavy-based saucepan."- he commanded himself.

- "Add the onion and celery and sweat until softened"- he did as told and steered the veggies in the pan

- "Why would they call it "sweat"? Are the vegetables actually sweating? who would come up with that concept?"

Spencer kept rambling for a few minutes until he noticed his pan looked exactly like Rossi's had. Reid was pleased.

- "Stir in the rice with a wooden spoon and coat each grain with the oil. Then, add the wine and allow it to evaporate."

The wine. Why did he drink so much wine the night before? It was a miracle he didn't do anything stupid, like dialing (Y/N)'s number just to call her "princess..."

- "Fuck!!"- Reid nearly yelled.

It was all Rossi's fault. What was that stupid thing he said? "Wine prepares the heart for love." Well, clearly, after all the wine they drank the night before, Spencer had been ready for love. So prepared, in fact, he had called (Y/N) "Love of my life," "Bub," and "Princess."

That shouldn't be so embarrassing, considering they were already dating, right? Right.

- "She is your girlfriend! You can call her cute names!"- he repeated himself- "Get your shit together, Reid!"

Yes. He had already called her "gorgeous" a few times before. For Christ's sakes, he had kissed her, and he had touched her (a little, and just upon her clothes). But there was no way he could or should be embarrassed to call her cute names!

Spencer was embarrassed anyway, and he couldn't shake the thought off his mind for the next half hour. Not until he heard a knock on the door.

(Y/N) was there.

It was on. Spencer's first official Valentine's celebration was about to start. And there was no way he felt ready for it.

- "Hello!"- (Y/N) said and smiled when her boyfriend opened the door for her.

- "Hi"- he whispered and held his breath for a few seconds- "You look so pretty."

- "Thank you... so do you"- and neither of them was moving. They just stared and smiled until (Y/N) asked.

- "Can I come in?"

- "Sorry!"

Spencer mentally slapped himself and invited (Y/N) in as she giggled and took off her coat. She was wearing the most flattering velvet dress. According to Reid, she looked so good, he forgot how to breathe for a second.

- "Are you ok?"- (Y/N) asked him, and he just nodded- "What are you cooking? it smells amazing."

- "It's a surprise,"- Reid answered flirtatiously and held (Y/N)'s hand- "Can I get you something to drink?"

- "Yes, please,"- she answered and bit her lips for a moment, staring at the man in front of her. Spencer caressed her cheek softly for a moment before leaning in and kissing her sweetly.

- "Happy Valentine's day, Spencer,"- she murmured

- "Happy Valentine's day, (Y/N),"- he answered, resting his forehead against hers, closing his eyes, enjoying that moment of love. Reid wasn't used to feeling like that too often, and he decided to hold it.

Dinner was a success. (Y/N) was in awe with everything Spencer had prepared for her. It wasn't just the fact dinner was delicious, but also the cooking class with Rossi and how thoughtful he had been with everything he had done for her.

That man deserved the best Valentine's ever, and the present and card she had gotten for him didn't feel like enough.

- "I hope you don't mind, but I got dessert,"- (Y/N) said and giggled, staring at her boyfriend, who was just walking to the dining room holding two cups of tiramisu.

- "What? Why? you didn't need to bring anything, I just..."

- "Well, after last night's call, I couldn't stop thinking about this...."

(Y/N) opened her purse, took out a big Nutella jar, and placed it on Spencer's table. He stared at it, not getting what it meant for a moment.

- "Why are you...."- until it hit him- "Oh... ooh!!"- and Spencer's cheeks were burning red in less than a second.

- "I didn't know if you meant it, but it sounded like a good dessert"- (Y/N) smiled and poked out her tongue as she finished talking.

- "I actually..."- Spencer's brain shut down for a few seconds as he realized what he had actually imagined doing with (Y/N) might even be real that night.

- "I like your idea way better than the tiramisu"- that was all he managed to say and looked at (Y/N) standing up, walking towards him slowly. She dipped her finger in the Nutella and spread a little on his lips, to then lick it, very gently.

- "Technically, it was your idea. You suggested it. I just brought the Nutella"- she whispered and looked at Spencer, who was utterly paralyzed.

Reid needed a few seconds to gather his thoughts again, but it was totally worthy when he did.

He held (Y/N) close and deepened the kiss, feeling her moan against his lips.

- "You don't mind the germs that might..."- but she was cut off immediately by Spencer's rushed words.

- "I give a shit about all the germs in the world right now."- and all (Y/N) could do was giggle, staring into his eyes.

- "Happy Valentine's Reid."

*****

Taglist

@all-tings-diego​  @calm-and-doctor​

[arianajbb]

FIC RECS - 1

💕 Clueless by @justsomebucky 

Movie AU. Inspired by Clueless - A high society boy and a do-gooder-type girl find love.

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💕 as you wish, ma’am by @aescapisms

SOCIAL MEDIA AU || Bucky Barnes fucks up and sends you the wrong presentation file.

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💕 A Lesson In Love by @buckyywiththegoodhair 

(College!AU) In which you’re assigned to write a story about romance, a subject you know nothing about, and Bucky, a hopeless romantic, offers you his assistance.

. 💕 The End Of The War by @redgillan 

Everyone knows you and Steve can’t stand each other, but after he runs into you after one of his fights, he starts to see you in a different light.

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💕 Babies! Assemble by @honeyloverogers 

On a mission involving time travel, as if they haven’t learned at all that it’s dangerous, the Avengers get turned into babies. Including your boyfriend.

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💕 Have You Any Wool by @threeminutesoflife 

Dinner with Ransom doesn’t go as planned.

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💕 Peaches and Plums by @cptnbvcks 

After escaping hydra, Bucky finds a pretty peach vendor to work out his troubled mind with.

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💕 Stitches by @revengingbarnes 

You’re just a clueless new medical student. You’re not equipped to deal with charming, witty, handsome doctors. Especially not ones with pretty blue eyes that make you weak in the knees.

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💕 Saturdays by @sunmoonandbucky 

Bucky Barnes has a new routine.

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💕 Love Made Me Crazy by @sinner-as-saint 

It was all strategic; a plan meticulously constructed by you and your business partner; against James Buchanan Barnes. Not to take him down, no. But just to surpass him in the business world by uncovering his secrets; to learn his ways and hope to be better than him in every way possible. The façade you put up – of being close to him and earning his trust was supposed to be short-lived, most importantly; harmless. But then as always, things got a tad bit more complex when feelings intervened…

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💕  To Be So Lonely by @wlntrsldler 

When Bucky and Y/N signed up for this online pen pal system, they never expected to grow attached to the other person behind the screen. In the pen pal system, they can only unlock the other person’s messages on the 25th of each month. They can write and send off their response as soon as they want but the other person is not able to see it until the 25th.

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💕 eye candy by @angelwidow 

Being Tony Stark’s receptionist was hard. Working alongside the most gorgeous salesman you’d ever seen was even harder. Actually talking to said salesman? Well, that was just insane.

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💕  Strange Times by @beccaanne814 

You have a certain type - smart, charming, and handsome as sin. For years you’ve been in love with the only man you thought possessed all of those traits, but a chance encounter with a Strange individual sends you and a certain ex-assassin on a journey of self-discovery. As you try to find a way back home, will you also be able to uncover the perfect man hidden beneath layers of guilt and self-loathing.

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💕 Stuck Wit U by @slyyywriting 

You and Bucky don’t get along. Your fights have become too destructive so Tony and Steve decide that enough is enough.

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💕 Take Me Higher by @buckychrist 

Who knew that the way into the big broody super soldier’s heart was through his unmet need for a good cuddle?

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💕 x by @mcfreakin-bitch

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💕 x by @thejamesoldier 

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💕 Betrayal by @midnightsunfae 

Bucky catches you flirting with someone at a party and he doesn’t take to it very well.

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💕 two paper airplanes flying by @feliciahardyn 

ransom drysdale will always find you, no matter where you are. always.

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💕 Dear Lover by @feliciahardyn 

you dance with bucky barnes in the obscurity of your room as you recalled the first time you met and how three years later you ended up tangled in each other’s arms. (based on the song “lover” by taylor swift)

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💕 Make You Love Me by @slyyywriting 

You flirt with Bucky every single chance you get.

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💕 The unseen one by @extremelyblackandwhite 

The God of the Underworld falls in love with a mortal.

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💕  Hellfire by @chamomilebottom 

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💕 Promised by @cherienymphe 

when you start waking up with bruises you can’t explain, your nightmares turn into a reality.

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💕  Everything by @trillian-anders 

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💕 tell me you own me by @darthstyles 

mean daddy harry comes out to play

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💕 The Chef’s Strike by @bucky-smiles 

A contract went unfulfilled…

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💕  Bittersweet Temptations by @revengingbarnes 

Y/N Y/L/N loves coffee, always has, which is why she spent all her adult years creating the perfect coffee shop. Cutesy, homey and cozy, it’s the job of her dreams. So what if business has been a little slow lately? It’s her happy place, it would always be. But that was all until the flirty, witty and obnoxious Bucky Barnes opened up a rival coffee shop two blocks down the street. Business and profit are all Bucky cares about. He’s the exact opposite of everything Y/N stands for, and naturally, she can’t stand him. But what happens when Y/N is running the risk of losing her beloved shop and Bucky’s the only one lending her a helping hand?

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💕 The Neighbor by @staymay5 

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💕 came in close by @buckyskorpion 

what could possibly go wrong with a couple of good-natured pranks between sworn enemies?

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💕 (1) New Message by @yikeswtfmate 

One night Wanda and Nat dare Y/N to text her hottest ex. She complies, only to realise it’s not her ex she’s texting and this might be the most attractive man she’s actually laid eyes on.

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💕 Eye For An Eye by @sinner-as-saint 

Battered and bruising, Y/N is out to seek sweet revenge from a man, James Buchanan Barnes, who tore her family apart 10 years ago. Y/N’s plan was simple; infiltrate his life, mess with his head, toy with his heart and leave him broken. Headstrong, she will stop at nothing, not even when it comes down to her being the villain in her own story…

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💕 Under Oath by @ugh-supersoldiers 

The people called for justice, the state answered. The trial of State v. Barnes is set to begin, and the odds are most certainly not in favor of the not so beloved ex Winter Soldier. That’s where you come in, the quick, smart, and all too brave lawyer set on defending and saving one Bucky Barnes from legal prosecution. The only problem? He’s not so sure he’s worth saving at all.

. 💕 Hate To Love You by @revengingbarnes 

While on her death bed, Y/N’s mother has just one wish; her daughter to be married and settled in her life. It’s something her mother has never stopped pestering her about. But up until now, Y/N had managed to not give into her family’s traditions of arranged marriage. And she might have continued to do so if weren’t her mother’s last desire. Unable to refuse her mother’s desperate plea, Y/N agrees to meet the man her parents have chosen for her. There’s just one tiny problem. Her soon-to-be husband is her ex. More tragically, he’s the one ex she never managed to get over.

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💕 Everything by @hootyhoobuckaroo

. 💕 late night devils by @whistlingwillows 

Bucky gets revenge on his ex with you, the girl he never got over no matter how much he thought he did.

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💕 Safe with Me by @bitsandbobsandstuff 

When an unknown threat enters your life, protection is offered at the highest level. As Bucky Barnes comes into your life, the game changes, and you realise falling for the man tasked with keeping you safe is the last thing you expected.    

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💕 Wildest Dreams by @hopesbarnes 

Everyone said he was a bad guy, that he broke hearts. But maybe they were wrong about him.

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💕 Things Bucky says during sex. by @steveodinsonbarnes 

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💕 charming by @venusbarnes 

in which you’re a girl in need of protection, and Bucky’s the perfect man for the job.

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💕 one stroke and you’ve consumed my waking days by @buckthegrump 

Bucky has a pen pal.

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💕 Just One Kiss by @sarahwroteathing 

Bucky Barnes has been chasing after you since he was ten years old, but you’re determined not to give in. How long can you hold out when all he’s asking for is just one kiss? (40′s happy ending AU)

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💕 Come Over by @moonstruckbucky 

You’re new to New York City. Fresh out of post-grad and wanting a change of pace, and this change comes in more ways than one.

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💕 Even In The Darkest Times by @justauthoring 

Bucky x reader where they were together in the forties and when Steve goes back, he sends her into the future so she can be with Bucky while he stays in the past with Peggy.

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💕 Hearts Don’t Lie by @daenyara 

when y/n and her family have to leave Europe to escape the war, finding love in New York is the last thing she expects (and the last thing that interests her). Much to her annoyance, her parents set her up with the one person in all Brooklyn she cannot stand: the charming James Barnes, who’s decided to show her he’s not as bad as she thinks.

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💕 A Bid on Bucky by @samingtonwilson 

You spend thousands of dollars at a bachelor auction for Bucky when you could’ve had him for free this entire time.

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💕 Helpless For You by @sgtjbuccky 

A blind date has lead you and Bucky to the fourth date. Each one proving that you’ve got it bad more than prior and it doesn’t quite matter what will happen - you will keep on falling for that handsome devil and you don’t even mind.

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💕 Lavender by @wkemeup 

Not every nightmare is the same and Bucky doesn’t always wake up as the man you know.

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💕 Fixed by @drawlfoy 

draco has a teasing relationship with the reader–they playfully argue and go back and forth but never acknowledge the fact that there may be something more. draco notices her pulling back and becoming more reserved. he follows her out of the dining hall one day to find her having a breakdown over a dark secret.

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💕 Anytime by @notimetoblog

Bucky is still cautious when it comes to touching people & vice versa. one day after a mission, the avengers are in the quinjet on their way home, Bucky sat down beside the reader & accidentally falling asleep on her & snuggling her. she doesn’t make it a big deal but all the other members are surprised. just fluff involving soft Bucky.

[howdon-aldi-death-queue]

NEW SAM FENDER INTERVIEW FOR NME

THE BIG READ

Sam Fender: “This album is probably the best thing I’ve done in my life”

The hometown hero has distanced himself from the ‘Geordie Springsteen’ tag, but there’s no shortage of rites-of-passage yarns and colossal tunes on the upcoming ‘Seventeen Going Under’

“You can see the ghost of Thatcherism over there…” says Sam Fender, pointing across the water to a vacant shipyard, where once the shipbuilding industry was so healthy that vessels towered higher than the rows of houses on the shore. We’re on the waterfront in North Shields, just outside Newcastle, and our photographer is snapping away for Sam’s first NME cover shoot.

The singer-songwriter stares stonily into the lens as wafts of seaweed and fishing trawlers are carried by the northern coastal breeze. He’s already been stopped for a few pictures with fans, but remains eager to point out the impact that Tory leadership has had on his working-class town over the last few decades. “It’s been closed since the ’80s, from the ghost wasteland of the shipyards. You’ve got all the scars of Thatcherism from The Tyne all over to the pit villages in Durham.”

It’s as good an introduction as any to the outspoken musician, whose 2019 debut album ‘Hypersonic Missiles’ was a record for his sleepy hometown to be proud of – tackling themes that range from male suicide (the heartbreaking ‘Dead Boys’) to world tensions (and the “kids in Gaza” he eulogised on its soaring title track). He set weighty topics against blisteringly well-executed Americana with the fist-in-the-air euphoria of Bruce Springsteen’s colossal choruses and sax solos. Much like his hero, Sam smartly weaves his own political standpoint and personal circumstance into gripping anthems of a generation, which earned him the ‘Geordie Springsteen’ tag.

“I can’t exactly bat off those comparisons, can I?” he says back in his cosy recording studio nearby. “At the same time, I don’t feel worthy of that tag. The first time I heard it, I was like, ‘That’s fucking sick’, but you don’t want to be riding off the coattails of The Boss for the rest of your life. I can write my own songs, they’re different and my voice doesn’t sound anything like Springsteen’s. I don’t have his growl; I’m a little fairy when I sing.”

He may have toned down the Springsteen vibes slightly on his highly anticipated second album ‘Seventeen Going Under’, due later this year, but there are still plenty of chest-pounding anthems capable of making your hairs stand on end: “I much prefer Americana to the music we have in our country at the moment. I love the leftfield indie stuff like Fontaines D.C, Squid and Black Midi, but I love a chorus and melodic songs. I think the American alternative scene has that down with Pinegrove, Big Thief, The War On Drugs.”

‘Hypersonic Missiles’ thrummed with a small town frustration almost that every suburban teenager could surely relate to. This was most notable on ‘Leave Fast’, where he sang about the “boarded up windows on the promenade / The shells of old nightclubs” and “intoxicated people battling on the regular in a lazy Low Lights bar”, a reference to his beloved local. But album two sees him fully embrace North Shields, an ever-present backdrop to cherished memories and harrowing life events of his youth and surroundings.

It’s no coincidence that the 27-year-old has turned inwards and penned a record about his hometown while being stuck at home like the rest of the country: “I didn’t have anything to point at and I didn’t want to talk about the pandemic because nobody wants that – I never want to hear about it again. It was such a stagnant time that I had to go inwards and find something, because I was so uninspired by the lifetime we we’re living in.

“I’ve made my coming-of-age record and that was important for me – as I get older, these stories keep appearing; I’ve got so much to talk about. I wrote about growing up here. It’s about mental health and how things that happen as a child impact your self-esteem in later life. On the first record, I was pointing at stuff angrily, but the further I’ve gotten into my 20s, the more I’ve realised how little I know about anything. When you hit 25, you’re like: ‘I’m fucking clueless! I know nothing about the world.’ It was a humbling experience, growing up.”

Early last year, before the pandemic hit, Sam was set to jet off to New York pre-pandemic to record in the city’s infamous Electric Lady studios founded by Jimi Hendrix. “Looking back, I’m thankful that it happened,” he says. “If I went off to New York and did my second album there… it wouldn’t have been the same record. I will go and do the third one in NYC, come hell or high water – I’m fucking out of here!

“The forced return home really informed the direction [of the record]. I was on the crest of this insane wave; we’d sold out 84,000 tickets for the [‘Hypersonic Missiles] arena tour that we still haven’t played yet. I’m still waiting to hear when it’s going to be rescheduled. It’s incredibly frustrating; I’ve got loads of frustrated fans. That was all cancelled on the day of the lockdown. I thought it was only going to be a couple of months and that it would be another swine flu thing, but fool me – I was stuck in the house like everybody else.”

It’s not the first setback that Sam has dealt with in his career. In the summer of 2019, he was ready to make his Glastonbury Festival debut with a Friday afternoon set on the legendary John Peel Stage, a rite of passage for any emerging artist, but had to pull out due to a serious health issue with his vocal chords. The mood in the room shifts dramatically at the mention of this devastating period: “I don’t want to focus on that, to be honest, because it’s just negative news and it’s in the past.”

“The further I’ve gotten into my 20s, the more I’ve realised how little I know”

Looking back now, he says, it was a tough decision, but ultimately the right thing to do: “We were doing so much at the time and I just burnt out. If you damage your vocal cords, you can’t take it lightly. If something happens like that and you keep going, you’ll fucking lose your career forever. I never want to end up behind the knife; I just refuse to put myself in that situation.”

The fact that his 2019 breakthrough ground to a halt again in COVID-decimated 2020 “was frustrating as fuck”, he says, “but I took solace in the fact that everyone was stopped in their tracks that time; it wasn’t just me.” This was in stark contrast to the singer’s experience of pulling the biggest moment of his music career in order to rest his vocal cords: “I didn’t talk for three weeks; I had to be silent and just watch Glastonbury on the TV, going, ‘This is completely dogshit’. But you can’t even say that out loud – you’re just saying it over in your head like a psycho. I’d take a pandemic over that any day.”

There was a brief flash of light when he headlined the opening night at the world’s first socially distanced arena, Newcastle’s Virgin Money Unity venue, to an audience of 2,500. Yet Sam’s not in the mood to wax lyrical about that, either. “It was amazing,” he says, “but it didn’t happen again.” A local lockdown in the North East brought the following shows – which would have featured Kaiser Chiefs and Declan McKenna – to a premature end in September: “It was another false start. We thought everything was going to get moving again but then we were just sat around [again].”

As for this reaction to the Government’s handling of the pandemic? It perhaps says it all that he’s selling face masks emblazoned with the words ‘2020 Shit Show’ and ‘Dystopian Nightmare Festival’ on his website. “I think everyone has said enough haven’t they?” Sam suggests. “I never want to see Boris Johnson’s or Matt Hancock’s face ever again. As soon as they come on the TV, I just turn it off.”

Political tension bubbles through ‘Seventeen Going Under’. Its second half boasts tracks such as ‘Long Way Off’, a brooding but colossal festival anthem brimming with angst and unease. “Standing on the side I never was the silent type,” Fender roars, “I heard a hundred million voices / sound the same both left and right / we’re still alone we are.” It’s gripping stuff; a Gallagher-level anthem ripe for pyro and pints held aloft.

Sam says the song is about feeling stranded amid political divisiveness here and in the US, epitomised when Donald Trump supporters stormed the Capitol in Washington back in January: “You’ve either got right-wing, racist idiots or you’ve got this elitist, upper-middle-class section of the left-wing, which completely alienates people like myself and people from my hometown.”

“The polarity between the left and the right has me feeling like I have no identity”

Closer to home, the last UK election, in 2019, saw the so-called ‘Red Wall’ crumble as working-class voters in the north defected from Labour to Tory. “The polarity between the left and the right has me feeling like I have no identity,” Sam says. “I’m obviously left-wing, but you lose hope don’t you? Left-wing politics has lost its main votership; it doesn’t look after working-class people the way that it used to. Blyth Valley voted Tory just north of here. Now, that is saying something! We’re in dire straits when a fucking shipbuilding town is voting for the Tories – it’s like foxes voting for the hunter.”

He’s even seen his own working-class friends peel to the blue side: “I’m like, ‘What the fuck is going on?’ I understand it, though. I’d never vote for the bastards because I fucking hate them and I know what they’re up to, but I get why people don’t feel any alliegiance to left-wing politics when they’re working-class.”

As ever though, Sam isn’t masquerading as an expert: “I’m not fucking Noam Chomsky, you know what I mean? I’m not going to dissect the whole political agenda of the Tories and figure it all out because I can’t. All I see is a big fucking shit sandwich – every day through my news feed – and it’s just, ‘Well: that’s what your dealing with.”

The singer is fond of describing North Shields as “a drinking town with a fishing problem”. Today he adds: “That’s been the backdrop of my life: all of these displaced working-class people. It’s a town that’s resilient that still has a strong sense of community. In a lot of big cities that’s dead. In London everything changes from postcode to postcode, but everything is quite uniform up here.”

When NME was awaiting Sam’s arrival outside the studio before the interview, a passerby clocked our photographer’s gear and asked, “Oh aye – are you waiting for Sam? We all know Sam – a good lad; very accommodating with nae airs or graces about him.” Another pointed to The Low Lights Tavern down the road, where Fender used to pull pints on the weekends: ��He was a terrible barman, and he’ll be the first to tell you that. I think he got sacked about six times during his time there.”

Sam (who confesses of his bartending know-how: “He’s totally right!”) hit the local to celebrate when ‘Hypersonic Missiles’ won him a Critics’ Choice gong at the BRIT Awards in 2019, placing the trophy on the bar. “I owed The Low Lights one for being such a shit barman,” he says. “I wanted them to be proud of us because they fucking certainly wasn’t proud of us when I was around working there!”

“Celebrity stuff freaks me out. I’d rather just live my life”

He’s clearly a key member of the local community, then. How did he see the pandemic impact on his family and friends – especially when the North East faced the toughest Tier Four lockdown restrictions last December? Sam pauses before bluntly saying: “I lost more mates; there was suicides again. Mental health was the biggest thing. We lost friends who had drunk too much.”

A track on the new record, ‘The Dying Light‘, is an epic sequel to ‘Dead Boys’, with the poignant last line of the album ringing out “for all the ones who didn’t make the night”. Sam, unable to truly distance himself from The Boss after all, explains: “It’s very Springsteen. It’s my ‘Jungleland’ or ‘Thunder Road’ – it’s got that ‘Born To Run’ feel; there’s strings and brass [and] it’s fucking massive. It’s a celebration. It’s a triumph over adversity.”

He stresses that it was vital for him to be in regular contact with his friendship circle through that traumatic time: “It becomes important when you lose friends to suicide… You realise it’s always the unlikely folks. We lost a friend to suicide at the beginning of last year and it was someone you’d never expect. It really hits home; it’s important to check in on your mates.”

Sam has alluded in previous interviews to a health condition that he’s not yet ready to fully disclose, and tells NME that he spent three months shielding at the beginning of the pandemic: “I was alone for three months and that was very tough… When you’re completely alone and isolated, it’s impossible. I spent a lot of time drinking and not really looking after myself and eating shit food, but I wrote a lot of good lyrics.”

There’s a certain resulting bleakness to some of his new songs, but Sam also wanted light to shine through. “It’s a darker record, but it’s a celebration of surviving and coming out the other end,” he explains. “It’s upbeat but the lyrics can be quite honest. It’s the most honest thing I’ve done.”

You might expect a young hometown hero to rail at having been denied the chance to capitalise on his burgeoning fame in the last year or so, but Sam insists, “I still have imposter syndrome,” adding: “I don’t feel like it’s happened… I’m walking around the street and people ask for photos and it just feels bizarre. I’m like, really? I feel like I haven’t come out of my shell yet.”

Sam has rarely been one to court celebrity, and revealed in 2019 that he’d turned down the chance to appear in an Ariana Grande video. “It was an honour but I would have just been known as that guy in the video,” he tells NME. “All of my mates would have been flipping their heads off, but I don’t think she would really want an out-of-shape, pale Geordie. I’d rather just live my life, because all of this celebrity stuff freaks [me] out, you know?”

He might have to get used to it: things can only get bigger with the arrival of the new album. “As a record I think this one is leagues ahead [of ‘Hypersonic Missiles’],” he says, “I’m more proud of this than anything I’ve ever done. It’s probably the best thing I’ve done in my life. I just hope people love it as much as I do. With the first album, a lot of those songs were written when I was 19, so I was over half of it [by the time it was released]. Whereas this one is where I’m at now.”

“This is a dark record, but it’s a celebration of surviving and coming out the other end”

Still, he adds: “At the same time, this record is probably going to piss a lot of people off.” He’s referring to a line in one of the more political tracks, ‘Aye’, where he returns to his most enduring bugbear, divisiveness, and claims that “the woke kids are just dickheads”. Sam’s no less forthcoming in person: “They fucking are, though! Some 22-year-old kid from Goldsmiths University sitting on his fucking high horse arguing with some working-class person on some comments section calling them an ‘idiot’ and a ‘bigot’? Nobody engages each other in a normal discussion [online] without calling each other a ‘thick cunt’.”

He’s eager to make this statement, though, come what may: “I don’t fucking care any more. I’m not really sure how the reaction is going to be. People used to say things online about me and I used to get quite hurt about it, but now I’m like, ‘Well, they’re not coming to my house’… [But] I get so angry. In Newcastle we say ‘pet’ and someone was trying to tell me that was fucking offensive towards women. You’re not going to delete my fucking colloquial identity. It’s not even gender-specific; we say it to men and women. My Grandma calls me ‘pet’! That brand of liberalism is fucking destroying the country. We could be getting Boris Johnson and all them pricks out of office if we stopped sweating over shit like that”.

Sam might be outspoken, but he’s self-aware, too. When we were talking politics earlier, he said: “I didn’t want to start on ‘cancel culture’ because I don’t want to sound like Piers Morgan [and] I fucking hate that cunt. But there is a degree of it which lacks redemption; people fuck up. Everyone is a flawed character. If you’re not admitting that you have flaws, then you’re a fucking psychopath. The left-wing seem to be that way and the right-wing are fucking worse than they’ve ever been. Politically I have just lost my shit.”

In all of this uncertainty, though, it seems a sure thing that Sam Fender will take his rightful crown – as soon as the world lets him – with the colossal ‘Seventeen Going Under’. “It’s going to be a hell of a return,” he insists. “I know the fans are still there, you know? So I’m not really worried – I’m ready to go out there and do my thing. Finally!”

[ahopelessromantic]

Pizza Guys and Drug Dealers ➳ S. Reid

Pairing: Spencer x Reader

Word count: 1,2k

Warnings: none

Spencer starts disappearing after work, so naturally, the team starts to get worried.

“Reid, you up for a burger?“ Distractedly, Spencer looked up from his desk. “Huh?”, he asked, then shook his head once he understood the question. “Oh sorry, no. I gotta go.” Before anyone could even say anything else, he was out of the bullpen, leaving behind a very confused team. “Not to sound mean or anything, but since when does pretty boy have somewhere to be in the evenings?” JJ shrugged. “No idea. Maybe another cinema festival?”

“There you are.” You sighed with a wide smile upon seeing Spencer standing in front of your door. He pulled you into a long kiss that sent shivers down your spine. “I missed you.” He mumbled quietly after pulling away, leaning his forehead against yours. You grinned and kissed him again while closing your apartment door behind the two of you. “I missed you more. That’s why you have to make a very important decision now, Doctor Reid. Do you want to eat dinner first or”, you cleared your throat, “Check out the bedroom?” He looked at you with a glint of mischief in his eyes. “I think I’ll go with the latter.” “Oh really?” You returned his gaze with a smirk that resembled the one on his face. “How surprising.”

Nights like these were amazing. Spencer was as much of an amazing partner in bed as out of it, and there was nothing you loved more than giggly post-sex cuddles on your couch. Each of you had a reheated plate of food in your laps, more feeding each other than anything else. Spencer was counting down fun facts about the most random of topics and all you could do was laugh, basking in his presence. He had been an unexpected addition to your life, one that had taken you by storm and captured your heart before you had even had the time to look for your head. You had stumbled into Spencer at the museum you worked at, and from then on he had come there every week until he had mustered up the courage to ask you out. Four weeks of amazing dates later you had asked him to be your boyfriend, and ever since then the two of you were going strong. It was hard sometimes, the worries you had to go through every time he was away on a case, but he always made it up to you by showing up at your doorstep with a souvenir from whatever city he had been in. The whirlwind that had been the start of your relationship was beginning to calm down, but the feelings you had for him weren’t disappearing. With each passing day, a bigger part of you was starting to get convinced that he was the one.

“Spencer, do you think you could take some of my paperwork today?” Emily asked as nicely as possible even though she already knew that he normally loved some extra paperwork. But no, today, for the first time since she had started working at the BAU, Reid looked at her with an apologetic expression. “Sorry, I can’t. I have to, uh… go water my plants.” And with that he was gone, leaving behind a confused team once more. “Okay, can anyone of you remember the last time they saw Reid outside of working hours?” Prentiss asked and only got shaking heads as a response. “Nope.”, Morgan said, crossing his arms. “He has been kind of distant, hasn’t he? Normally he’s the last of us to have any plans.” “I’m only surprised it took us this long to realise. When was the last time he came out with us for a drink?” JJ widened her eyes. “Months? Honestly feels like a year.” “Okay, all of you, into the conference room. I wanna know what he’s up to.” All of them agreed immediately, Garcia joining them not even five minutes later. “Babygirl, can you see where he’s always off to?” Penelope returned her best friends gaze with a conflicted look. “Of course I can. But I feel bad about tracking him, don’t you guys?” “Pen, what if he’s doing drugs again? I already feel bad about not noticing his behaviour much earlier.” Emily mused. “Alright.”, the analyst sighed. “But if he finds out, it wasn’t me okay?” Within just a few clicks Garcia had found an address. “This is where he goes the most besides his own apartment. Do with that information what you want, I’m out.” Morgan typed in the address on his phone. “Looks like it’s an apartment building.” JJ nodded, chewing on her lower lip. “Okay, I think only one of us should go. So he doesn’t feel like we’re ambushing him, right?” “Makes sense.”, Emily agreed. “Alright, you guys go home. I’ll go there and update you tomorrow.” Morgan nodded at all of them as a goodbye and left for the garage. After typing the address into his navigation system he got going, a weird feeling rising in his stomach. What if Reid really was doing something stupid again? But then again, he hadn’t been acting any differently during work, just always left as soon as he could. Arrived in front of the apartment building he took a deep breath, trying to hype himself up. Garcia had been able to find out which apartment he went to from his phone data, and once he found it, he rang the doorbell. He had expected many things, a drug dealer, a psychiatrist maybe, but what he really hadn’t been expecting was coming face to face with a girl dressed in nothing but an oversized shirt. You squinted, mustering the man in front of you. “You don’t look like the pizza guy.” He looked just as clueless as you. “And you don’t look like a drug dealer.” “What?!” You gasped, only now starting to feel uncomfortable in your basically undressed state. “Of course I’m not a drug dealer!” You hissed. You watched him scan you from head to toes again, realisation suddenly dawning on the man’s features. “Wait, is that Spencer’s shirt?” You only felt more confused by the minute. “Uh… yeah?” A bride grin grew across the stranger’s face. “Oh man, I am so sorry to barge in here like that. I’m Derek Morgan.” Still absolutely not knowing what the hell was going on you shook his hand. Thankfully, in that moment, Spencer had decided to join you at your doorstep. “Honey, what’s taking so long with the-“ He stopped in his tracks upon seeing the man. “Morgan?! What are you doing here?” Morgan just chuckled and shook his head. “Just checking in, I’m leaving already. But you have some explaining to do tomorrow, my man.” Still chuckling the stranger disappeared down the hallway, leaving the two of you alone again. You looked between the still open door and your boyfriend. “Spence, what just happened?” He buried his face in his hands. “That was Derek Morgan, one of my co-workers.” You felt your chin drop. Holy shit, this was absolutely not how you had planned to meet any of his team members. And of course, it was only now that you recalled one of his co-workers being named Morgan. “They’re never going to let me live this down.” Spencer whined, a blush spreading across his cheeks. You chuckled and placed your hand on his back. “But hey, at least I wasn’t a drug dealer, right?” He sent you a murderous glance, and you laughed. You couldn’t wait for him to get back from work tomorrow.

[realcube]

What BNHA Heroes have their s/o saved as in their phone

Class 1A x Reader

+ Aizawa and Shinsou

tw// cussing, cringe smh, lots of love <3 

Class 1A

Yuga Aoyama 

he has you saved as ‘my ✨star✨’

and honestly you love it because he calls you that in real life too 

Mina Ashido 

she has you saved as ‘bubs 💞💓💖💝💘💕’

 the only reason there isn’t more hearts was because of the limit smh

she changes it every few weeks to a new pet name though

also she calls you that irl sometimes

Tsuyu Asui

she has you saved as ‘my flower 🌺’

honestly, the only reason she put you as that rather than your name because of your intense love for flora

every date you take Tsuyu on is always to somewhere with beautiful scenery and an abundance of flowers

Tenya Iida 

he has you saved as ‘beef stew’

he originally had you saved as ‘(Y/N) (L/N)’ 

but you showed him that you had him saved as ‘Honey’ so he wanted to save you under a pet name too

however, he couldn’t really think of one so he asked for you assistance and you told him that most cute pet names come from food

“So, what food do I remind you of, Iida?” 

“Beef stew.” 

Needless to say you both were laughing your asses off for a while after that 

but it’s still cute because beef stew is his favourite food just like you are his favourite person

Ochako Uraraka

she has you saved as ‘(L/N) <3 ’

she wanted to use a heart emoticon but her flip-phone doesn’t let her smh

Also she doesn’t have a pet name for you yet but she is working on it 

like she tried calling you ‘baby girl’ but then you explained to her the sexual undertones to that name so she stopped and she’s been too embarrassed since then to try again 

Mashirao Ojiro

he has you saved as ‘tail boy’s s/o 🤪’

y’all had a whole-ass discussion about this one time lmao

y’all were brainstorming ideas for what you should save each other as in your phones

you didn’t want to have something basic like ‘babe’ or ‘my heart🥰’ but rather something funny and you suggested (jokingly) to save his contact as ‘tail boy’

and rather than being offended like you thought he’d be, you both ended up laughing your asses of together for a solid 5 minutes (at least)

so you saved his contact as that and since he couldn’t come up with a funny nickname in relation to your quirk, he just saved you as ‘tail boy’s s/o🤪’

 Denki Kaminari 

he has you saved as ‘ASH CECHUM 😩😳💦🌚💓🧀'

plz don’t ask about the emojis idek

anyway, he saw that you saved him as ‘Pikachu <3′ which makes sense considering his quirk..

so he took it upon himself to save your contact as - in his own words - “That guy who owns the Pikachu from Pokémon’ 

however, despite the fact he has watched Pokémon before, he had no idea how to spell Ash’s second name and apparently the thought never came him that; ‘hey, maybe I should google it.’

so he just sounded it out 

as for the all caps, contrary to popular belief , he does know how to turn it off

he just chooses not to for the aesthetic and also it takes a lot of effort 

that is why he doesn’t use proper punctuation either 

Eijiro Kirishima

he has you saved as ‘love bug’

honestly, you’re not too sure of when or why he changed your contact name after y’all started dating but..

you thought it was cute but..a bit cringe

obviously you didn’t say anything about it though, you weren’t trying to be mean to your boyfriend for no reason

it’s not like he called you that irl

however, he’d be out of his mind if he thought you were gonna save him as something like that 

the best he’ll get from you is ‘Kiri babe 🤘' (get it? bc...rock!)

Kouji Koda 

he has you saved as ‘love bug’

ASKJFCWB YOU THINK IT IS OUT-OF-THIS-WORLD ADORABLE OML

like it makes sense because he like talks to insects and stuff and you’re his lil love bug cause you are his lover and stuff hhhhh

also because of the size difference between you and him, i mean, you are basically the size of an insect compared to him 

in short, Koda supremacy  🙇‍♀️🙇‍♂️

Rikidou Satou

he has you saved as ‘sugar pie’ 

honestly, poor man

he was completely clueless when you asked him to save you as something cute 

like, he know what you meant...but he had no idea what to go for 

so you chose for him 👍

and you made a pretty good decision tbh I mean, it’s cute! it relates to his quirk and all

and he has started to call you that irl sometimes and it always makes your heart go brrrrrrr

Mezou Shouji 

he has you saved as ‘hunk’ 

ok, i know i said Satou was a poor man but let me just say

THIS POOR MAN 

you told him it’d be cute if you both saved each other as cute pet names in your phones and dead ass him response ‘you’re not my pet though..’

AAAAAAAAAAA

so after a lot of explaining, as an example you whipped out your own phone and showed him how you had saved him as ‘hunk’ 

...he really went and just copied you

you thought that was so funny and precious though so you didn’t ask him to change it

Kyouka Jirou 

she has you saved as ‘my melody 🎶’

ok, so it started when she noticed that you use the same pen everyday - a My Melody one

she thought that was so fucking adorable and she kinda started teasing you for it; not that you minded though

she also thought it was so cute when you’d get all flustered 

so one day she just decided to change your contact name to that 

it also kinda tied in with her love for music (but mostly her love for you uwu)

Hanta Sero

he has you saved as ‘my honey nutter butter biscuit’

after Kirishima called his s/o ‘love bug’ infront of y’all that one time, you both spent the next hour taking the piss and laughing at how over-the-top couple nicknames are sometimes 

so just #for the meme he saved your contact as a hyperbole of what those cringe couple pet names are like

oh and you have him saved as ‘My beloved sweet peach taco’

Fumikage Tokoyami

he has you saved as ‘Helena’

yeah, he wanted to be edgy and save your contact after a MCR song

(no, he does not know that Helena is about Gerard’s grandmother but don’t you dare tell him)

Shoto Todoroki

he has you saved as ‘(Y/N) (L/N) 💖’

you texted him something during lunch one time to see his reaction while you were sitting next to him but then you noticed that your name in his phone was simply ‘(Y/N) (L/N)’

you mentioned it briefly but you didn’t make a fuss out of it because it really wasn’t a big deal

however, he asked to see what his name in your phone was and you showed him

you had saved him as ‘Babey ( •̀ ω •́ )✧’

he went home and did some research on some good pet names to save you as in his phone

after that, his search history kinda looked like;

‘pet names’

‘pet names for humans’

‘pet names for lovers’

‘cute nicknames for my girlfriend’

‘cute emoticons’

he deadass came in the next day and the first thing he did was pull out his phone and show you the emoji he put next to your name

“Look, (L/N). I found this emoticon and put it next to your contact name in my phone.”

yes, he sound like boomer..obvs

he spends 90% of his free time training rather than on his phone 

and the time that he is on his phone, he isn’t using emojis, he is searching shit like 

‘how to hack into a credit card without the PIN’

Tooru Hagakure

she saves you as ‘❤😘’

no, she doesn’t need to save you as your name to remember who you are 

she’s not a peasant

Katsuki Bakugo

he has you saved as ‘pretty stupid face’

originally it was just ‘stupid face’

but you noticed it and just dropped a subtle comment like “hey, that’s mean.”

so he came in the next day with ‘pretty’ added to the start

“i am genuinely too nice to you sometimes.” he’d say

“THE STUPID FACE PART IS STILL THERE”

“I KNOW BUT I ADDED PRETTY TO THE START!!”

“Wow, tch, such I gentleman-”

“I know-HEY WAIT WAS THAT SARCASM?!”

Izuku Midoriya 

he has you saved as ‘sweetest love muffin’

you that one couple i mentioned in Sero’s headcanons?

yeah, that’s y’all

you are both literally that couple

“No, you hang up.”

“No, you hang up!”

“Nooo, cause I’ll miss you”

“I’ll miss you moreeee”

he literally threw a bunch of his favourite adjectives into a pet name lol

also your contact name for him is something on a similar wavelength

Minoru Mineta

I know most y’all would’ve even give him your number lol

but for those who would 🤮

he has you saved as ‘sweet cheeks’ or sumn 

Momo Yaoyorozu

she has you saved as ‘My McMuffin’

HOL UP LET ME EXPLAIN

ok so she let you take her to McDonald’s cause you wanted to see her reaction since she is used to gourmet cuisine or whatever

so it was sure to be entertaining 

and it was 

but not in a good way

she was almost sick after she had a bite of a big mac and then she tried to wash it down with the Sprite but then she fainted for like a solid 10 seconds

once she came back, she obviously wanted to leave..so you did 

A year later, y’all are in the town and both of you are starving 

But Momo realised that she didn’t have her card on her or any money but that was fine because at least you had your debit card on you 

You had enough money on it for a taxi back to Momos place and a McMuffin each

Obviously she didn’t want one but when you started eating in front of her, of course she wanted a taste

and so it was love at first bite

she loved it so much so of course you bought another one for her and she consumed it in a millisecond (not literally)

so now she has your contact saved as the one thing competing against you for her love - a McMuffin

Shota Aizawa

unfortunately he does not have your contact saved as ‘kitten’

instead, in his phone you are saved as ‘The One  💙’

simple, yet it effectively shows his admiration - just the way he likes it

 and he only added the emoji to make your name stand out more so he could easily tell whether he was gonna ignore the following message or not

because if Mike is texting him telling his that he needs the extremely important documents that Aizawa keeps in his coded filing cabinet, Shota will be like -.-

but if you text him asking for him to pick up chocolate on his way home, he’ll be like 🏃‍♂️

Hitoshi Shinso 

he has you saved as ‘big daddy’

plz don’t ask 

it’s an inside joke between you and him

okay well, if you must know 

y’all were trying to come up with the most absurd nicknames for each other that kinda sound legit 

some other gems 

‘Muscleman’

‘Big scary snookums’

‘sexy giant’

[atruththatyoudeny]

Monthly Reads | October 2020

Happy 28th! I probably sound like a broken record already but I have to say it again: this fandom has an insane amount of talented writers! I am in awe! Every single one of you is my hero! ♥♥♥ Here are all the 23 fics I read and loved this month:

✧ Welcome to The Rivalry | 2tiedships2 | a/b/o - strangers to lovers - enemies to lovers - rivalry - college - 19k “Welcome home!” Niall yelled, clapping his hands in excitement. “Isn’t it great?” Louis looked between Niall and the house, unsure how to respond. “I don’t understand,” Louis finally managed to say. “Aren’t we a little old to be living so close to campus?” Niall scoffed. “You’re only twenty-four for fuck’s sake. There is still plenty of partying left for us to do. What better place than one street over from where a car was set on fire after the Michigan game last year?” “Is there proof of that? Did the car have Michigan plates or something? Is there a photo I can send in a DM to Wolfie?” As if on cue, a Twitter notification popped up on Louis’ Apple watch. He had tweeted again. Or a reverse You’ve Got Mail au inspired by the Ohio State/Michigan rivalry. Featuring duplex neighbors, (kind of) enemies to lovers, and an anonymous Twitter feud between omega Louis and alpha Harry.

✧ Back to Seventeen | crimsontheory | teacher - soccer coach - 26k As a first grade teacher in a small town in Illinois, Harry’s life is pretty simple. He loves his job, is close with his family, and has a best friend he would go to the ends of the earth for. When a new soccer coach starts at the local high school, things start to get a bit more exciting for Harry. Because that coach just happens to be Louis Tomlinson; the guy Harry was unrequitedly in love with in high school. Or the one where Louis moves back to his hometown and Harry realizes he’s still not over his high school crush.

✧ Sigh for Sigh | logogram | historical - a/b/o - regency - miscommunication - pining - marriage of convenience - 11k When his father's sudden illness forces Harry to get married in a hurry, he's delighted that Lord Louis Tomlinson is the one who makes him an offer. Being married to Louis is just as wonderful as he imagined, except for one thing-- they haven't mated yet. Or the one where they're both idiots, Harry's afraid to say what he's thinking, and Louis's just trying to be honorable.

✧ We Can Find a Place to Feel Good | yeah_alright | 1960s - High School - school dances - 8k 14-year-old Harry is ecstatic to finally be old enough to experience the time-honored tradition of school dances. But with each year that passes and each dance he attends, he’s realizing they’re not all he used to hope they’d be. Especially when he can't actually dance with the person he most wants to. Maybe he and Louis can figure out their own ways to keep dancing, anyway.

✧ At Risk, I Fold | clare328 | canon compliant - established relationship - angst - emotional hurt/comfort - miscommunication - anxiety - implied/referenced alcohol abuse - 15k 2015 is a stream of hotel rooms and whisky on the rocks, tired glances and touching hands under tables. It’s the bears and the bees under a rainbow sky, and Harry and Louis have to figure out how to grow up together, instead of apart.

✧ Carry These Feelings | LadyLondonderry | fae Á faires - established relationship - magic - 3k Harry is one of the fae, and has to return to Court once a year to please the Queen. He makes a detour on his way home to Louis. Two weeks and I'll be home.

✧ Hung Up High in the Gallery | lovelarry10 | friends to lovers - slow burn - pining - 14k "Louis, lay still!” Louis sighed loudly, and Harry watched his chest puff out as he inhaled deeply, the breath he let out loudly making Harry’s curls shift. “I am, stop being so fussy. Can I see yet?” “Nope,” Harry remarked, smiling to himself. “I’m doing your chest next. Shit, this is going to look so good, Lou. Your tan and these colours… why haven’t we done this before?” “Because we haven’t been this drunk in a while, and it never occurred to me until tonight?” ❁ ❁ ❁ ❁ ❁ ❁ When Harry’s best friend, Louis, comes to support him at his art show, he decides they need to do some celebrating afterwards. How fast do the lines between friends and lovers get blurred ... or better, get painted?

✧ Love you in the dark | Perzikje | historical - wedding night - arranged marriage - dubious consent - 10k The story of a historical wedding night: in which Louis is quite unaware as to just how clueless his brand new husband is about sex. They try their best to figure it out together.

✧ Victorian Boy | audreyhheart | historical - victorian - royalty - enemies to friends to lovers - slow burn - angst - murder mystery - 101k Victorian AU. Harry the virgin Duke of Somerset knows little of love, while Louis the sly Duke of Warwick knows too much. When the two dukes come together for the Bilsdale fox hunt in York, Harry finds himself drawn into Louis' bed. But when secrets from Louis' dark past come to light, Harry fears that the fox isn't the only one being hunted.

✧ the anticipation of knowing you | sweetrevenge | strangers to lovers - neighbors - light angst - 13k Hello Neighbor! Just wanted to let you know that you were having sex so loud and scarily I called our building manager and security officer because I thought you were hurt. P.S. I sent them away when I heard you yell ‘cock’. I’m sorry that I heard that, but I wanted you to know in case they stopped by to check on you or something. Sorry! Your neighbor Louis Tomlinson in apartment #306 After Louis overhears his next door neighbor having sex, he doesn’t really expect anything but awkward hallway encounters to come from it. Instead, he’s surprised to find himself in a whirlwind pen pal relationship with the sweet, albeit loud, baker next door.

✧ We'll Be All Right | dandelionfairies | married couple - accridents - 13k Harry is performing his one night only show in LA but there are four very important people missing.

✧ The Last Song of Your Life | reminiscingintherain | famous/not famous - Rays of Sunhsine - homophobia - 21k As Harry glanced around at all of the faces, he froze as a very familiar pair of blue eyes leapt out at him. A pair of eyes that he hadn’t seen since before the One Direction bomb exploded. A pair of eyes that he never expected to see again. ~~~~ or the famous/not famous AU, with first love, miscommunication, interfering bandmates, and adorable little sisters.

✧ Her | jaerie | a/b/o - trans character - transitioning - dysphoria - anxiety - quarantine - 7k The buttery swipe of a high quality lipstick was almost a sexual experience in and of itself. This time a deep colour with purple undertones which drew out the emphasis of long, dark lashes and perfectly contoured cheekbones. It was a look for loose and styled curls, feeling the classy formal nightclub vibes reflected back from the mirror. The silky plum coloured slip dress would be perfect to debut. The tags still needed to be cut free from the new garment that hung in the closet, but tonight was the night to set it free. When Harry gets home, she can finally be who she wants to be. Letting someone else in always feels like a distant daydream to her... until it suddently isn't.

✧ Loving You's the Antidote | lululawrence | Stylinshaw - a/b/o - touch deprivation - hospitalization - soulmates - polyamory - anxiety - friends to lovers - no smut - 11k Nick and Harry had never been an obvious match. When eighteen-year-old Harry, newly presented as an omega, came home freshly bonded to Nick, a man nine years his elder and a beta no less, Anne had been more than skeptical and Eileen had shared some harsh words of her own. That didn’t deter them, though, and their families soon realised there really was something special about the bondmates that allowed them to work together almost seamlessly. It was only a few months later that Harry started getting sick. Or the one where Harry and Nick have been able to keep Harry's disorder at bay over the course of their relationship, but when they move to London and away from their support system, they find themselves in desperate need of help.

✧ Like A Neon Sign | reminiscingintherain | canon compliant - mentions of death - fluff - 8k Harry had always been perfect to Louis, through every age, through every stage, and in all the important ways, he was proud to have been able to witness the growth that Harry had experienced first-hand.

✧ We Had Everything | lightswoodmagic (sarah_writes) | exes to lovers - getting back together - famous/not famous - 3k “You know Harry’s coming, yeah?” Louis’ fingers twitched, faltering where he was straightening the knot in his tie as he tried to ignore the false nonchalance in Zayn’s voice. He had no idea how he missed the name on the invite list, how he skipped over the initials on the small gifts, didn’t notice the elegant swirl of Harry’s name inked onto an emerald green place card. Or, Louis and Harry fell apart, and Louis' never forgiven himself. He gets a second chance at Zayn and Liam's wedding.

✧ True To Your Heart | reminiscingintherain | Mulan AU - a/b/o - 13k The world was at war with itself. In the small country of Enilenif, in a tiny, often overlooked corner of the world, young Alphas were quickly signing up to fight, desperate to protect their Omegas and their country as Aidem began to attack their borders. A few defiant Omegas tried to enlist as well, but were firmly turned away with disapproving looks by the staff in the office. Harry Styles was one such Omega, sighing heavily as he kicked at a small stone on his walk home.

✧ What the Water Gave Me | larryatendoftheday | fantasy - mermaids - long distance relationship - 29k When a mermaid crawls out of the sea to listen to Harry sing, it changes everything.

✧ it’s hard for me to go home | localopa | angst - breakup - getting back together - 5k don’t call me baby again

✧ The Prince and the Thief | jaerie | Fairy Tale - a/b/o - strangers to lovers - violence - kidnapping - threats of rape/non-con - 19k Harry is an omega prince locked in a tower and Louis is the thief sent to kidnap him. Nothing turns out as planned.

✧ Up On The Shore | wordsnnotes | Eroda AU - magic - epistolary - friends to lovers - childhood friends - emotional/psychological abuse - angst - long-distance relationship - domestic violence - 34k Magic has been outlawed on Eroda ever since President Cowell came into power, and all the magic people had to go live on the island of Stonell. Things are not looking good for Harry when he finds out he's a magician and his abilities seem more and more out of control. Thankfully, his best friend Niall's mother has the idea to put him in touch with Louis, a magician boy living on Stonell. They begin a secret correspondence and drama ensues. Or: Louis hides his feelings under sarcasm, Harry is too sweet for his own sake, everyone is a rebel, the mums are amazing, Harry's dad is a jerk, and I'm struggling to make it understandable without using normal narration.

✧ this town's just an ocean now | louistomlinsons | exes to lovers - friends to lovers - summer romance - miscommunication - childhood friends - light angst - fluff - 31k “I have really great friends. Do you remember Louis? You guys were always hanging out when you were growing up.” Harry remembers Louis. Harry remembers Louis. Suddenly, his throat feels way too dry, despite the ice cream he keeps licking at. He chokes a little on a chocolate chip before saying, “I, uh. I remember Louis.” Her face brightens. “We have dinner every Sunday. He owns the house now. His parents moved further north, and he wanted to stay here, so they just gave it over. Now if you want to worry about someone being lonely, that’s who I worry about.” inspired by watermelon sugar, featuring picnics on the beach and boys being dumb

✧ I Am the Blinking Light | dearmrsawyer | ghosts - shipwreck - 19k There is a legend of a lighthouse far out to sea. It can’t be found on any map, and those who do find it never return. They say a ghost haunts the lighthouse, and you can hear it calling out in loneliness on the ocean waves.

[nothingeverlost]

The Most Brilliant Idea, or how Sirius Black Accidentally became a Romance Novelist (HP, Wolfstar)

In which Sirius has a Brilliant Idea, Remus is gainfully employed, James is clueless and Lily is always right.

Unmitigated fluff with minor references to the first war, AU because James and Lily didn’t die.

II

It started with the classified, the first bit of proof that everything that happened was really Moony’s fault.  There was always a classified ad in the kitchen, even when Moony was working, part of his optimistic opinion that any job could and would end.  The classified ads were always marked in pen, and one could tell just how Remus thought his prospects fared based on how he’d marked a job.  Some were viciously scratched out (potions expert and anything with ‘night shift’ in the description) some were circled multiple times (he usually came away dejected from those interviews, things he actually wanted but rarely got) some had question marks and some had a single bold circle.  It was the single circle ones that were the best prospects.

On this particular Tuesday morning while Sirius drank his tea and dripped jelly on a story about Minister Fudge’s election, the only ad that was circled was one looking for a book editor.  It was commission work, the sort of things Moony did from home sometimes.  It suited him, both because he was such a stickler for commas and spelling and because the flexibility meant that moons didn’t present a problem. The only downside was that it was sporadic work, a book at a time, and didn’t bring in enough income to make Moony feel like he was Contributing to Household Things.  Sirius always rolled his eyes.  Moony was the most stubborn person he knew.

It was then that he had his Most Brilliant Idea.  What Remus needed was a constant stream of editing.  Someone who would keep him employed on a regular basis with things a lot more interesting than editing a technical manual on the care and keeping of flobberworms.

“Lily I need to borrow some books.”  When someone had a Brilliant Idea they had to start right away, so his first action was to floo to the Potter home.  He was distracted for half an hour by Harry who insisted on a hippogriff ride and a sword fight, and he wouldn’t be a proper godfather if he said no to either, but after that it was strictly business.

“The only books we have here that you don’t have are meant for a three year old.  You and Remus had quite the library between you,” Lily replied after telling both him and Harry they could only have two biscuits.  Sirius took a third, but split it in half so it didn’t count.  After all, two and a half was practically the same as two.

“Not true.  Moony and I don’t have any of those girly books,” he said with his half a biscuit in his mouth.

“You want to borrow my romance novels?” Lily asked, puzzled.  “I don’t know who you’re trying to date, Sirius Black, but romance novels aren’t actually meant to be used that way.”

“Like I need help,” Sirius said with an eye roll.  Sure, it had been a while since he dated but that was totally his choice.  He had a lot on his plate right now with a godson that needed his attention and Moony needing looking after and his three days a week working for Quality Quidditch Supplies.  “They’re for Moony.”

“Somehow I doubt he knows that.”  Lily rolled her eyes right back at him.  “Take as many as you like, and don’t worry about when you get them back.  It’s not like I have much time for reading when I have three boys to look after.”

“Something you want to tell me, Lils?”  He looked at her stomach pointedly and wondered if they were really ready for another Prongslet.

“Yeah.  You and James are more work than Harry and he has the excuse of being three.”  But she gave him a bag for the books and sent him home with a plate of biscuits, warning him that she would tell Remus that she’d sent them so not to eat them all in one go.  It was like she didn’t trust him or something.

Once he had the books stage one of The Plan could begin.  He’d read a few of the romance novels when he was bored and they seemed like the easiest book to write.  Certainly they weren’t anything Moony read so he could borrow a bit from others and no one important would be any the wiser.  Over the next few days he spent most of the time Moony wasn’t around reading, stashing the books in the closet so they wouldn’t be seen in case Remus came in his room for late night chats or early morning bed sharing.  It was a habit that they’d never quite left behind in school, especially when either of them had a nightmare.  With the war almost two years gone the nightmares weren’t as frequent but they were always a good excuse if he needed company.

Stage Two of The Plan had a few false starts, as writing a book proved to be a little trickier than he figured, considering how many books he’d read.  Finally though after twenty-six days he had a story written.  The pining of Sigmund G Toadsnatch for Anastasia Flower ended in a passionate snog and a happily ever after.  It was time for Stage Three.

“I need your help.”  The moment Moony was gone for the day he popped around to the Potter home again, this time with manuscript in hand.

“Harry managed to get jam in his hair at breakfast and I have to give him a bath.  Can it wait?”  Her arms were full of a squirming toddler, anxious to greet his ‘Padfoo.’

“I’ll give him a bath,” he offered.

“The last time that happened you flooded the bathroom and transfigured the soap into a boat.”  She carried Harry up the stairs.  Sirius followed.

“He came out clean, though.  Mostly.”  He might have missed a few spots, but no one was perfect and there had been an important battle with a giant squid that looked a lot like Harry’s toes to wage.  “I need to know if you have any friends that have girly writing and want to earn a few quid.”  He plopped himself on the edge of the tub after stowing his manuscript on higher ground.  

“You need what?”  it was really quite impressive how she managed to run the bath, undress Harry, and listen to him.

“Alright, so this is the part where I have to swear you to absolute secrecy.  Unbreakable vow kind of stuff.  You can’t tell anyone what I am about to tell you, not even James.”

“You know James and I don’t keep secrets.”

“It’s not a big secret, just a little baby one.  The more people who know the more likely it is that Remus will know that people are keeping something from him and then the whole thing will be ruined.”  Besides Prongs would never let him hear the end of it if he knew what Sirius was doing.

“I will consider not telling him, once I know.  That’s the best I can promise.”

“I guess that will have to do.”  He was certain she’d see reason, or more importantly his side of things.  “Now about your friends.”

“Do I even want to know what girly writing means?”

“You know what I mean.  When you pick up something and you know a girl wrote it because there’s little hearts above the I’s and the ink changes color.”  Not that Lily had ever done things like that.  Her writing was perfectly sensible, not that it mattered.  Moony would recognize her handwriting.

“Your handwriting is pretty fancy, with all those loops and the illustrations in the margins.”  Lily made a few loops of her own, sending bubbled cascading into the tub to entertain Harry.

“One of the many skills a pureblood snob is required to learn, according to my dear old mum.  Trust me I’ve tried mimicking James but it’s useless.”  James wrote in a barely legible scrawl that only those with practice could read.  Sirius envied him, though it had led to an accident or two over the years especially in potions and what time they were supposed to meet.  “But it doesn’t matter, Moony knows my handwriting and that’s the whole point.  I need someone to copy over my writing so he doesn’t know it’s me.”

“I think I need more focus and perhaps something to drink.  Hold on a minute, will you?”  Lily finished up Harry’s bath, keeping him long enough to dry his hair but giving up when he decided to squirm out of her hold and run away without his togs on.  She shrugged.  “Won’t hurt him to air dry.”

“James said the same thing once.  It works better in a warm house and when you’re three, rather than when you’re thirteen and it’s snowing out.”  He’d won the dare, though, and claimed it was worth it.

“Yeah, I remember that.  Thought he was mental then.  Now I know he is.”  Lily headed for the kitchen and started a pot of tea brewing.  “Now please tell me you’re not trying to get me to help you prank Remus.  You know my rules.”

“It’s not a prank.  It’s a Brilliant Idea to help Moony.  You’re going to love it.”  He couldn't hold it in anymore.  “I’vewrittenabook.”

“Excuse me?”

“A book.  I’ve written one and I’m going to send it to Moony to edit it, and then I’m going to pay him.  But he’s not going to know it’s me so he’s going to accept the money without being his stubborn prideful self.  When he’s done I’ll have another story ready and then he’ll be gainfully employed and happy and he won’t have to worry about what happens to his job when there’s a moon.  Brilliant, right?”

“I’m still on the bit where you wrote a book.”  Lily poured the tea and set a slice of quiche on a plate for Sirius.  The spinach was in small enough bits that it didn’t actually look like a vegetable and he might not notice that under all the cheese he’d actually eaten something green.

“It’s not hard.  I read the books you had and I wrote something like it.  Boy meets girl.  One of them annoys the other.  There’s secret longing and someone trying to keep them apart and then they snog and everyone’s happy except the evil bloke who ends up in a cellar or something.”  He shrugged and ate the food Lily had given him without much thought.  He’d been so excited about the next stage that he hadn’t bothered with breakfast.  “The book’s not really the important part, though, and there have to be bits to fix or else Moony won’t have anything to do.  What’s important is that Moony doesn’t know it’s me.  I have to rent an owl once it’s ready and send him a letter about a job.  I have a name picked out already.  Marmaduke Gaylord from Gaylord’s Romantic Press.”

“I don’t know why anything you come up with should surprise me anymore, Sirius Black.  It’s completely bonkers and there’s probably fifteen different ways it could go wrong.”  Lily reached across the table and covered one of his hands with her own.  “It’s also unfailingly kind and possibly crazy enough to work.”

“Of course it will work.”  Any doubts he’d had he’d buried down deep enough that he wouldn’t have to worry about them for a while at least.  Probably not until the whole thing exploded in a very Sirius-like fashion.  

As it turned out Lily did have a friend that could use a little spending money and had hand writing that, while not containing any hearts, was feminine enough to satisfy Sirius and more importantly wouldn’t be recognized by Remus.  She rewrote the manuscript in her own handwriting.  Sirius borrowed a typewriter from Arthur Weasley to make an official looking offer from the Gaylord Romance Publishers.

Stage Four was well timed, as Moony’s job in a muggle bookstore ended that week after the third time he’d had to miss work the morning after a full moon with no explanation.  Sirius had made sure he was tucked into bed with a water bottle and a cup of tea with a warming charm that would last at least an hour, then nipped over to Diagon Alley to rent an owl for a single trip.  The offer letter and manuscript were bound together. For an added bit of cleverness he’d asked the clerk to delay the delivery until afternoon so that Sirius could be home when the owl arrived.

“What could be so important about a romance novel that they’d be willing to pay this much?”  By afternoon Moony was feeling well enough to be on the sofa instead of in bed.  Sirius glanced at the letter Remus handed him and shrugged. 

“Dunno, mate.  Guess there’s enough people reading them to make it worth their while.  The girls at school all read them.  Tripped over them all the time in the common room.”

“They’d be better off reading Austen,” Remus groused but he was also quick enough to send off an acceptance letter with the owl.  Sirius had a plan for that as well, and a newly rented owl post box.

“I’ll give you some quiet to work.”  Sirius locked himself in his room, using the time to start his second novel, the story of five sisters all sorted into the same house  and the rich pureblood transfer student who seemed rude but was secretly shy.  The prat’s best friend was cheerful and had a crush on the main character’s sister.

“Comma,” was the comment he heard the most from the other room.  ‘Why’ and ‘bloody hell’ and ‘you can’t do that to the English language’ were also common exclamations.

“Sounds like it’s going well,” Sirius said when his stomach was too loud to ignore.  

“It’s the most ridiculous thing I’ve ever read and the romance is dreadful but there are some bits that are hilarious, actually.  Don’t know their goal but as a satire it’s not bad.”  The stack of papers in front of him was all marked up in red ink worse than the first essay he’d ever written for McGonagall.

“I thought romances were supposed to be all sappy.”  His main character had declared his love seventeen times.  That was what girls wanted, wasn’t it?

“Fortunately I’m only supposed to edit the grammar and not the sap.  I’m over my head on that sort of thing.  Imelda Carson seventh year said I was the most unromantic boy she’d even snogged.”

“Imelda Carson is an idiot who is now breeding pink pygmy puffs and is completely single because no bloke was romantic enough for her.  Besides you don’t like girls, remember?”

“I like girls just fine.  I just don’t want to snog any of them or…”

“Smash your bits together?”  Sirius offered.

“Yeah, exactly what I was going to say,” Remus said dryly.  “I’m starved and close to going cross eyed from this editing.  Whose turn for dinner?”

“I’ll start some steaks.”  Sirius danced towards the kitchen.  The Plan was going perfectly.

II

It seemed silly, really, to have a wonderfully written and perfectly edited novel and not do anything with it.  The original plan didn’t take into account anything outside of making sure that Remus was employed, but when Sirius collected the edited manuscript from the owl post it seemed a waste to just throw it away or lock it up somewhere.

“I need a name.”  It was just before lunch when he flooed to Godric Hollow, finding Harry just up from his nap and more than excited to use uncle Padfoot as a climbing toy.  

“You know some people do give a little notice instead of barging in all the time.  There’s a lovely front door on this house I don’t think you’ve seen in two years.”  Lily winced when Harry’s foot found a foothold on Sirius’s crotch, but really the man deserved it.

“Other people aren’t nearly as entertaining as me.”  Sirius winced as well and moved Harry’s foot a little higher, regretting it when the lad’s next handhold was his ear.  “Now about that nom de plume.”

“I thought you were only writing so Remus could have an editing job?”

“Yes, but that’s no reason not to share my genius with the world.”  He waved his manuscript over his head.  

“How many times did Remus threaten to throw up while reading this drivel?”

“Only once but he edited that bit out.  Not even I can be perfect my first time out.”  Lily, of course, rolled her eyes for approximately the 42,596th time since she’d first met Sirius.

“If you’re serious about this we should do it properly.  No more ridiculous names.”

“I’m always Sirius.”  He couldn’t resist.  After all the joke never got old, no matter how many times Lily groaned.  “Too bad I can’t use my name.  Imagine how dear old mum would roll over in her grave if she knew the sacred Black name was attached to a romance novel.”

“Sirius.”

“You’re right, Lils.  If she got too excited she might reanimate and the world is not ready for zombie Walburga.”  He shuddered dramatically at the thought, making Harry, now perched on his shoulders, laugh and say ‘again.’  Of course he obliged.

“Leave it with me and I’ll sort it out.  I’ll have Molly redo a clean copy and send it off to Mary who’s a junior editor and a publisher.  We’ll see what happens, alright?”

“This is why I love you, Red.”  Sirius gave her a kiss on the cheek and handed her the manuscript so he could get down to what was really important; teaching his godson how to make bubbles in his milk.

II

Three months later Phaedra White was a published author.  Sure, there wasn’t an enormous amount of money in a single book, but it was more than what he’d spent to pay Molly and Remus so it seemed profitable enough, and he was more excited than he’d expected to see it on the shelves of the bookstore..

In the next year ‘Phaedra’ wrote nine more books.  More importantly with actual connections in the publishing world he was able to recommend Moony’s services to other authors, to the point that he began to worry that if Remus had too much work he might turn down the requests from Marmaduke Gaylord to edit Phaedra’s books.

“Get the bucket, Pads, I’m going to be ill.  This is the worst thing I've ever read.  Not only do I want to vomit but I think my eyes are bleeding.”

“It can’t be that bad.”  His own book had arrived that morning but Sirius hadn’t known that Remus had started on it already.

“I don’t know how Gilderoy Lockheart got my name but I’m never editing a book for him again.  Not only is it nonsense that clearly didn’t actually happen, but it’s badly written as well.”  It was hard to tell from Moony’s tone what offended him more, but it was probably the bad writing.

“Wasn’t there a Lockheart a few years behind us in school?  A gormless little thing that spent more time on his hair than anything else?”  They didn’t usually pay much attention to Ravenclaws, but if he remembered correctly the boy had annoyed them enough that they’d pranked his hair blue once.

“That’s the one.  What he knows about defense against the Dark Arts would fit in my little finger.”  Remus pushed the manuscript away.  “I can’t even look at this again until I have some chocolate.”

“I picked up a new stock from Honeydukes when I was at Diagon.”  Rule number one for the care and keeping of your Moony was to always have a supply of chocolate on hand.  “Why don’t you grab a bar and we’ll go out for a walk.  It’s beautiful outside.”

“What would I do without you, Pads?  Why don’t we pick up some curry while we’re out, my treat?”  It was a plan, and they left the house shoulder to shoulder.  Later that evening after he’d eaten Remus returned to his work.  Sirius found him laughing, his shoulders relaxed, and not a single bucket around.

“Back at the Lockheart?”  he asked.

“No, I’ve given myself a respite and picked up the latest White novel.  You know this bloke is improving.  It’s really kind of nice to see the balance of romance and friendship in here.  Less sap and more affectionate teasing.”

“I thought that romance writer you edit for was a woman?”  Sirius held his breath for a moment.  Did Moony Know?  He couldn’t possibly.  

“I’m sure that’s what they want people to think, probably because most romance novels are written by women and I’d imagine they sell better.  But I’m practically certain this is a bloke writing this.  If the book centered around a flying motorcycle didn’t tip me off, the fact that the details about female anatomy are more vague than the male anatomy seems quite a clue.”  Remus shrugged.  “I don’t suppose it really matters, though.”

“No, I don’t suppose it does,” Sirius agreed.

II

“I need help.”  The next morning Sirius showed up at the Potter house in the middle of breakfast, not knowing what time it was.  James was still home, which was not the most favorable thing that could have happened.

“Help with what?” Prongs asked as he broke a banana into pieces for Harry.

“Nothing at all,” Sirius lied.  “Just a question for Lils about a girl thing.”

“Dating someone you haven’t mentioned to us yet?”  James cocked his head to the side.  “It’s been a while since you’ve mentioned anyone.”

“Yeah, well it gets to be all the same after a while, doesn’t it?”  Truth was he hadn’t had a date in ages.  His free time was taken up with writing, and the rest of the time he was with Remus, or Prongs and his family or both.  Lily had them over to dinner once a week at least, somehow thinking they couldn't take care of themselves properly.  His social life worked out pretty well, except for the lack of shagging.  He did miss that sometimes, but not enough to bother with finding a date.

“Not when you marry the love of your life and the most perfect person in the world.”  James, of course, couldn’t help looking at his wife.  Sirius was torn between wanting to gag and feeling a tight ball in the pit of his stomach that he’d never felt before.

“It’s been six years since you married her, Prongs.  You are going to be a little less sappy at some point, aren’t you?”  Of course considering how close they’d come to losing each other it was understandable.  And Sirius was happy for them, but as a sibling it was his job to raz James as much as possible.

“If you don’t like it you do know where the fireplace is, Sirius.”  Lily was careful when she stood up, her belly now heavily swollen.  Potter number four was due in less than a month.  “Come on, you can wash up dishes for me while you tell me what you need.”

Dutifully he followed her, ignoring Prongs’ questioning look.  When the water was running he looked around to make sure they weren’t followed.  “I need to know more about girls.”

“Excuse me?”

“Moony’s figured out that Phaedra White is a bloke.  Says there’s not much detail about women’s bits and things in there and that it sounds more like a bloke or something.  I don’t know.  My first thought was that I could use some polyjuice and spend an hour as a woman but that’s a month of work just to make the potion plus it tastes disgusting.”

“I’m not going to ask why you know what polyjuice tastes like.  I don’t want to know who you were or when or if my husband was involved.”  Lily rubbed her stomach absently.  “Your books are selling surprisingly well, I wouldn’t change things now.  Besides you should know at least the basics about women.”

“I know that their breasts are nice and soft, most of them like to snog, and redheads have very good aim.”  Or maybe it was just one specific redhead, who proved his point by throwing a spoon at the back of his head.

“Obviously rumors at school had to be taken with quite a few grains of salt and I know some girls exaggerated because it was good for their reputations for it to be known that they snogged the ‘great’ Sirius Black”  Lily’s voice was dripping with sarcasm and she stuck out her tongue for good measure.  “But you did date a fair bit, and I myself witnessed at least some snogging.  Are you saying you never…”

“Did the no pants dance?  Nah, girls are nice for kissing and easier for dating but for the whole naked tango I prefer a blokes ‘bits.’”  

“Huh.  I was dead certain about you and that Hufflepuff in sixth year.”  Lily shook her head, bemused.  It wasn’t like Sirius had ever hidden the fact that he liked boys as well as girls.  “But if you’re here to ask me about my ‘bits’ that’s where I draw the line.  We’re close, Sirius, but not that close.”

“You are the best sister a bloke could ever hope for, Lil my love, and as such that is a completely disgusting idea that I would never suggest.  I was thinking you might have a friend.”

“I am not pimping out my friends to you, brother dear.”

“You try to set up Remus sometimes.”  And somehow each time Remus came down sick and couldn’t come to dinner.  

“I worry about Remus being alone.  Do you know when he last went on a date?”

“Sometimes in the seventies, probably, and he’s not alone, he has me.  What could be less lonely then having me as a roommate?”  Other than a bit of time during the war he and Remus had lived together since leaving Hogwarts.  It worked well for them both, and honestly the idea of Remus dating made his left shoulder blade go all tense.  They took turns making dinner and washing up, cleaned the flat together on Mondays and read out bits of their books to each other as they shared a sofa in the evening.  If Remus was spending his time with someone else there would be less of the enigmatic little half smile that made his day better.  And at some point Moony would have to share his furry little secret and what if they took it badly and hurt him?  Or worse, spread it about?  Sirius would have to kill them and then he’d go to Azkaban and then Remus really would be alone.  It would be a disaster.

“Sirius have you ever considered…”  Lily stopped, wincing a little and struggling to pull herself up.  “This little one has great aim and likes to kick mummy’s bladder.  You’ll have to excuse us, Sirius.  And find your own dates.”

II

He did find his own dates.  Three of them, in the next month, and twice with the girl from the local coffee shop.  And though the snogging was nice he just couldn’t get interested enough in taking it farther, not even in the name of research.  Sighing he decided he was just going to have to keep doing what he was doing.  Besides, having Moony suspect that a romance novelist was a man was a far sight from having him suspect that it was the man he lived with so he was still safe enough.  After all who in their right mind would think that Sirius Black was writing romance novels?

When he got home from his last date he found a note stuck to his door in Moony’s careful hand.  The word ‘St Mungo’s’ might have worried him if not for the ‘Baby Potter on the way’ underneath.  He took a minute to change into something more comfortable, remembering that Harry had taken hours to arrive, and apparated to the maternity ward.

“You brought work with you?”  Remus was already there, sitting in the waiting room with a quill in one hand and a stack of pages on his lap.

“You know how long Harry took to make an appearance.  Might as well pass the time in a useful manner.”  Remus looked up at him, head cocked to the side.  “How was the date?”

“Bit boring, to be honest.  I think I’m out of practice.”  Dating used to be more interesting, but halfway through he’d found himself wishing that he was on the sofa throwing popcorn at Remus and asking about his latest book.  The editing of the Lockhart book and its ridiculous lies was keeping him well entertained.  “Speaking of the sprog, where is my favorite godson?”

“Lily’s friend Molly has him.  The one will all the redhead kids, you remember?”

“Yeah.”  Molly happened to be the friend that rewrote everything he wrote.  No reason for that to make him nervous, though.  “She was Gid and Fab’s big sister.”

“Yeah, she was.”  It was never easy to think of the casualties of the war so Sirius tried not to think of them, not even the ones with hair and hearts like fire who he’d shagged once.  Gideon had been one of his first crushes in school, and a compatriot in war.

“What are we working on tonight?”  Sirius tried to take a look at his papers.  “Anything good?”

“Something very frustrating, at the moment.  The latest Phaedra White.”

“I thought you said her books were getting better.  Seemed to me you quite enjoyed the last one.”  He took great pride in the fact that he’d made Moony laugh more than once, and that it came back with hardly any notes other than the usual missing commas and split infinitives.  The ending, Moony had declared, was only as sappy as was  necessary for that sort of story and not bad at all.

“It’s stupid.  I’m just the editor, there’s no reason for the direction of the plot to bother me so much.”  Sighing, Remus put the quill down.  

“I’m sure the author is grateful for your notes.  You said she’s listened to them before, hasn’t she?”  Of course he knew the answer.   He’d written three thank you notes for changes the Remus had suggested, and every time Remus had been right.  Merlin’s pants, Phaedra White was actually making best seller lists and had been mentioned in Witches Weekly twice, and Sirius wasn’t too full of himself to know how big a part Moony played in that.  His publisher was trying to make him do a book signing at Flourish and Blotts, and didn’t understand why he kept saying no to the publicity.  

“This isn’t the same situation.  It’s not a small change to a scene, it’s the whole romance that feels wrong.”

“You read me a bit the other night, between the bloke and his best mate that made you laugh.”  He’d found the byplay between his main character and his friend to be the most fun part of the book to write.

“That’s the whole problem.  Byron and George have this great relationship.  The scene where George is trying to convince Byron to go on the date feels almost like…”

“Like what?”  There were times that Sirius totally wished he could talk through scenes with Remus while he was writing.  He’d had to bite his tongue more than once when he remembered that he hadn’t sent a story to Moony to edit yet.

“Like he was trying to cover his own feelings for his friend.  The chemistry between the two blokes is more natural and interesting then the bits with Byron and Melody.”  Remus picked up his quill again.  “Now you see why I can’t write that suggestion. I’m not about to tell someone to trash half their story and turn it into a gay romance.”

“Moony, w-”

“She’s here.”  The door to the waiting room crashed open and Prongs came running out, tripping over his feet in his hurry.  “I’m a dad.”

“You’ve been a dad for almost five years, Prongs,” Sirius couldn’t help but tease him.  

“But never to a girl.”  It was funny how big Prongs’ eyes could get.  “Merlin’s elbow, I have a daughter.”

“Most of the bits are the same, mate.  You’ll be alright.”  Remus shoved his papers and quill into a bag and took out a flask.  “I think this calls for a drink.  Not too much, or Lily will kill us all, but just to celebrate.”

“You think of everything, Moons.”  Sirius shouldn’t have been surprised, it was very like Remus, but there was something about drinking out of the flask immediately after Moony’s lips had touched it that felt different.

“You’re brilliant, both of you.  In a minute we can all go in and you can meet my daughter.”

“Poor Lils, she’s got three kids on her hands now.”  Sirius pointed to the dopey looking expression on Prongs’ face.

“I think you mean four kid, Pads.  After all she has to deal with you as well.”

II

“Her name is Olivia Marlene.”  Lily had that exhausted but happy glow of a new mother when they were let in to see her.  The baby she held looked pretty much the same as Harry the first time they’d seen him, the dark hair on the top of her head and the splotchy looking face.  

“It’s a good name.  Strong.”  Moony nodded solemnly.  “Marlene would have been proud.”

“Marlene would have rolled her eyes and called me daff,” Lily said with only a hint of moisture in her own eyes.  “But if my daughter is half as fierce she’ll be able to do anything.”

“Moony, ready to say hello?”  James took his daughter from Lily and held her close to his chest.

“Let Sirius go first, I’ll hold her in a minute.”  Sirius had been the first five years ago, when Harry had been born.

“Sirius will have his turn but it should be her godfather first, Remus.”  When Lily spoke Sirius had the good fortune to be looking at Remus.  The look on his face and the way his knees buckled were priceless.

“Alright there mate?”  Sirius caught him around the waist and helped him to stand up again.  “Welcome to the club, by the way.”

“So will you, Moony?” James looked at him expectantly.

“I think you’re mental to ask me.”  But Remus carefully took the baby and held her, touching her cheek with a single finger.  Sirius felt for a moment like he’s turned into liquid marshmallow, watching the two of them.

“Welcome to the world, Olivia Potter,” Remus said softly.

It was in that moment that Sirius Black, author of almost seventeen romance novels, realized that he was in love with his best friend.

II

“I’m afraid I’m going to have to leave the country.”  Somehow Sirius made it through the next week.  He wasn’t sure how but it seemed only fair to give Lily a bit of recovery time before bothering her.  A week was as long as he could wait, though, and on the eighth day he flooed over.  

“That’s a bit of a dramatic reaction to not being chosen as godfather for our Olivia.”  

“What?  No, of course you should have gone with Moony.  Brilliant choice.  Probably should have picked him for Harry, bit of an unfair advantage Olivia has.”  Sirius flopped down on the armchair across from Lily.  “Where are the sprogs, by the way?”

“Baby’s sleeping.  Harry and James are at the park so Harry can run off some energy.”

“Prongs is probably the one that needs to run off the energy.  He’s walking on clouds, that one.  Reminds me of the week after you finally said yes to a date.”  Sirius was pretty sure James hadn’t slept for two days straight.  For a week he also hadn’t shut up, even when he did finally sleep.  He’d been well stuck on Lily long before they’d dated.  Sirius finally had an idea of what that was like.

“Probably.  Now tell me what you’re running from.”  Lily put on her best getting-ready-to-mock-you expression.

“Nothing really, only the most stupid thing I’ve probably ever done.”

“I’ve seen some of the stupidest things you’ve done, Sirius.  Many of them.  Unless you’re going to tell me you have to flee the country because aurors are after you I very much doubt it’s as bad as you think.”

“I’vefalleninlovewithMoony.”

“I’m going to need you to actually take a breath at some point, sweetie.  You’re going to turn purple if you don’t and then I’m going to have to explain to James and Harry why you’ve passed out on the floor.”  Lily patted the empty seat on the sofa next to her.  “Now come over here, take a breath, and tell me again what you said.”

Sirius, erring on the side of caution, took three breaths, decided that wasn’t enough, and took three more.  “I’ve fallen in love with Moony.”

“Now there, wasn’t that easier to say the second time?”

“You knew perfectly well what I said.”  Sirius narrowed his eyes.  “You tricked me.”

“Only for your own good.”  She leaned in and wrapped her arms around him.  “I know this bit is scary but you’re going to get through it and you’re going to do it without fleeing the country.”

“Didn’t you hear what I said?”  Maybe having a baby did something odd to your ears.  

“You’ve finally figured out that you’re in love with Remus.”

“Finally?”  Sirius stared at her.  

“Finally,” she confirmed.  “Other than this month because of your crazy idea about your books, when was the last time you dated?”

“Dunno.  That carpenter maybe?”  Sirius had wanted to find out just what else he could do with his hands.  The answer was quite a bit.  Unfortunately not so much in the brain department and even less in the sense of humor department.

“That was three years ago.  What is Remus’s favorite dinner?”

“Steak with mashed potatoes and lots of gravy, popovers, peas.”  It was a meal he liked to make a day or two before a full moon when Moony was feeling a bit low.

“And for dessert?”

“Chocolate, of course.  I found a chocolate fondant recipe the other day I thought I might try.”  Moony was happy to have a chocolate bar but Sirius liked to find new desserts to try.  Moony was always pleased when there was a new dessert.

“Who is the first person you see on Christmas morning and whose present do you spend the most time picking out?”

“Moony, of course.  We live together.”  Last year Moony had put a ridiculous ten galleon restriction on gifts, insisting he didn’t need anything extravagant.  His silly Moony hadn’t thought to specify that it was only a single gift, though.  Sirius had brought thirteen, but they were all under ten galleons each.

“And when you’ve had a really shitty day who is the first person you seek out?”

“Moony.”

“And when something wonderful happens who is the first person you want to tell?”

“Moony.”

“Are we seeing a pattern yet?  And before you tell me it’s just being friends let me remind you that you have created a whole career for yourself solely because you wanted to make sure that Remus had work that he could take pride in.  The entire existence of Phaedra White is basically one really long love letter, which is a bit over the top even for you.”

“I’ve been in love with Moony this whole time?”  It didn’t feel wrong when he said it.  Maybe later he’d be able to look back and figure out when exactly it all started, but for now it seemed to be enough that it was true.  “Why didn’t you tell me?”

“You were always going to figure it out in your own time.  I couldn’t make you go any faster and risk it not happening at all.”  Lily kissed his cheek.  “If I’d said yes to James in third or fourth year maybe we would still be where we are.  Or maybe I would have written him off as a ponce and I wouldn’t have him or my babies.  Things happen when they’re right, and you can’t rush them.  Or run away from them.”

“What if he doesn’t feel the same?”  Remus rarely dated and never said anything about marriage.  “What if I ruin everything?”

“What if he does?  I don’t have the answer.  I think you have to trust Remus and yourself enough to give him a chance to hear how you feel.”

“And if I fuck it all up?”

“Your friendship has survived war and betrayals and pranks gone horribly wrong, as well as seven years of sharing a dorm and about as long sharing a flat.  I don’t think it’s going to fall under the weight of loving him.”

“You better be right, Lily Potter.  If you’re not I’m going to be crashing on this sofa after I flee the flat in embarrassment, and I shed.”

II

Talking to Moony, of course, was a far too direct and logical choice.  It took an hour for Sirius to decide that no, that just wouldn’t do.

“You alright, Pads?” Remus asked when he spent the second hour after he returned home pacing.

“Just thinking about Christmas,” he answered distractedly.

“It’s May, I think you have some time before you need to worry.”  Remus caught his hand as he walked past.  “You look like you have one of your headaches.  Why don’t you sit down and I’ll give you a massage?  Or I could read something to you?”

“No books.”  Books are what had gotten him into the whole mess in the first part.  How could he tell Moony how he felt without also confessing the whole story of Phaedra White?  Why had he never considered that at some point Moony would have to know about The Brilliant Idea?  “I think I might just go to bed.”

“I’ll bring you some tea, it will help you sleep better.”  True to his word Remus showed up ten minutes later with a cup of tea, cream in first and half a spoon of sugar, just the way he liked.  He’d valiantly tried to fall asleep in those ten minutes, but had failed completely and sat up to accept the tea.  

“Thank you.”

“You know you can tell me if something is bothering you, right?”

“There’s no one in the world I trust more than you,” Sirius said honestly.  The tea was too hot still but he sipped it anyway, knowing he’d either burn the tip of his tongue or the roof of his mouth but not caring.  

“It’s a bit odd, isn’t it, Prongs and Lily having two kids now?  They’re well and truly settled, like proper adults.  Might make someone think about it a bit, wonder if they’re wanting something different.”  Remus settled on the edge of the bed, looking up at the ceiling as if he could see the stars overhead.

“Do you think about something different?  Finding your someone and settling down with a couple of sprogs?”  

“Merlin no.  That sort of life’s never been for me, even if I could find someone who wasn’t put off by my special little problem.  Besides I like things the way they are.  You know how much I loved marking up papers with red ink in school and I get to add commas and edit dangling participles to my heart’s content now, with the added bonus of actually making a proper amount of money.  And I couldn’t possibly ever be lonely or bored with you around.  If I want to play with a kid I just have to pop over to see Prongs and Lily.  Seems to me being a godfather is like the best bits of being a parent without all the rest.”  Remus shrugged and looked sideways at Sirius.  “I always figured you’d follow James’ example at some point.”

“I would have had to start developing a crush more than a decade ago, wouldn’t I, to really emulate Prongs?”  It made him stop and wonder for a moment, tea slopping over his chin as he stopped halfway to his mouth.  Just when had he started falling in love with Moony?  Maybe he was more like Prongs then he thought, with less of the whinging.  He couldn’t remember a time when making Moony smile hadn't been a priority, or when Moony touching him hadn’t been a comfort.

“Not like that, of course.  I mean the whole home hearth and family sort of thing, and making me a godfather.”

“I like my family just the way it is.”  It was a little too close to the truth, and Sirius faked a yawn.  “Night Moony.”

“Night Padfoot.  Sleep well.”  Despite being the first to say goodnight, Sirius was a little dismayed that Moony actually left his room.

II

The next day Sirius stopped by to pick up his post, finding a rather sizable cheque, yet another request for a book signing, and the edited return of his most recent book.  Remus must have mailed it when he’d been with Lily.  Flipping through the pages he found the usual red marks adding commas and rearranging the occasional unclear sentence structure, but nothing about the plot of the novel.  He hadn’t made any of the suggestions that he’d mentioned at the hospital.

Sirius took the book home and read through the story again.  Remus was right.  The supposed romance of the story felt flat and predictable when compared to the banter between the best friends, and George was clearly nurturing a crush on his friend.  He only wanted Byron to be with Melody because he thought it was what his friend wanted.  It was a mess.  Sirius was a mess too, but at the moment it was a lot easier to fix things for Byron and George.  All he had to do was cut half the book and rework the rest to make sure two best friends realized that they were actually in love.

When he was done he sent it off to Molly with a bonus payment and a warning that he might not be needing her help anymore.  She sent it back three days later with a cheerful little note letting him know that her twins kept her quite busy and while it had been fun to read his stories first she was fine with the change in things.  Also it was her favorite story yet.

“I need to borrow my godson.”  The day after he sent the manuscript back to Remus for editing he left the house early in the morning.  He couldn’t bear to be around when Moony saw it for the first time.  Better to let him read it and get it all over and done with at once, no matter what way it came out.

“You’re not back on the fleeing the country plan, are you?  Because you can’t take Harry to Spain.”  Lily raised one eyebrow.

“Why would Sirius flee the country?”  James held his daughter but stared at Sirius in confusion.  “You didn’t actually break into your cousin’s vault at Gringotts, did you?”

“I decided anything Narcissa owned would probably have cooties.  Not worth the risk.”  Sirius shrugged.  “I won’t even take him out of the county, Lils.  I promise.”

“Pads?  Lily?” James pushed, not having a clue what was happening but suspecting that his wife knew a fair bit more.

“Not now, Prongs.  I’ll tell you tomorrow if the world doesn’t crash around my ears today.”  

Lily, fortunately, said yes and Sirius was able to mostly distract himself with a trip to the zoo and far more ice cream than an almost five year old and a twenty-five year old should eat.  He returned Harry in time for tea but warned Lily that he probably wasn’t very hungry.

“I’m proud of you,” Lily said before he left, kissing his cheek.

“I’d probably be proud of you too if I knew what the bloody hell was going on,” Prongs added, kissing his other cheek.  Sirius said thank you to them both, decided against the floo, and apparated home.  He sat on the front stoop for half an hour before daring to open the door.  The flat was completely silent.  

“Moony?”  Maybe he wasn’t at home.  Maybe he hadn’t gotten the package or had been too busy to read it today.  Maybe he had read it and had run for the hills.  Maybe he hated it and hated Sirius and was in his room packing for a trip to Zanzibar.  For a minute he worried that Moony really was gone because the flat, even Moony’s room, were empty.  The last place to check was what they grandly called the balcony, which was really just a fire escape with a upside down rusty cauldron as a seat and a single pot with a dittany plant they barely kept alive.  Moony sat with his back to the wall, looking out at the view.  They were lucky enough to be on the side of the building that looked out over a park rather than another building.

“Hey.”  He settled on the sill of the open window, which was the only other place to sit but also meant that Remus couldn’t go anywhere without stepping over him, which could come in handy.  “How was your day?”

“I read a book.”  Moony didn’t look at him.  Sirius couldn’t tell what he was thinking at all, other than that he looked like he should be smoking.  They’d both given it up when Harry was born, though, and that went double now that Oliva had come along.

“Yeah?”  He took a deep breath and waited.

“Yeah.  I thought it was weird, at first.  It’s the same Phaedra White book I just edited, and I thought it was a mistake until I got through the first couple of chapters and it’s been completely rewritten.  I didn’t say anything about the story to anyone, other than you, but it was like they looked inside my head and saw how I wished the story had been written.  George was so certain that Byron was going to propose to his girl but instead there’s this scene, this magical scene where Byron says that he couldn’t fall for Melody because he was already in love.  That it had been George all along.  Sometimes your best mate is also the love of your life.”  Remus was still staring down at the park and Sirius wanted to shake him, or beg him to turn his head, or just kiss him and take his chances that Moony wouldn’t throw him over the side of the balcony.  

“Do you think that’s true?” he asked.  “Even when the best mate is a complete disaster who might be keeping a secret or two, but only because they want their best friend to be happy and not have to worry about anything?”

“Do I think that Byron and George are in love?”  When he finally turned, Moony had a perfectly inscrutable expression on his face, the one he used in school that let him tell McGonagall that he didn’t know anything about a prank that had in fact been his brainchild.  When he used it on anyone else it made Sirius smile.  Facing it himself was agonizing.

“Do you believe that sometimes your best mate can also be the love of your life?”  He’d channeled everything he felt and thought into Byron.  Remus set a great store in books and the written word, and Sirius hoped that maybe works written in black and white would make his argument for him.

“I think the hardest thing to believe is that I could possibly be that extraordinarily lucky.”  With the blink of his eye Sirius could see all the vulnerability Moony had been hiding.  The hope and the fear, the trust and the love.  The love he saw there knocked the breath out of him.

“Merlin, I think you just scared five years off my life, you were that hard to read.”  He pulled himself through the window and squatted in front of Remus.  “Do you really think you could love me?”

“You deserve to be scared, you bloody git.  You had me secretly editing books you wrote and somehow you became an author for the lark of it.”  Remus rubbed his forehead, like he did when something was puzzling him or the writing of something was particularly confusing.  “I’ve been in love with you for ages, Pads, and I find there’s generally very little thinking involved.  It’s a simple fact.”

“I don’t think there’s anything simple about it.”  Sirius Black was the author of seventeen and a half books, and it seemed to him there was only one possible option for what came next.  He kissed Moony, of course.  Kissed him like Byron had kissed George, like Psych had once kissed Cupid and Darcy had kissed Elizabeth.  The kiss had been brewing up inside him for some time and he did not stop until the air was gone from his lungs.  And then he said the words that he planned on repeating every day for the rest of his life.  “I love you Moony.”

“I love you too, Phaedra White.”

Sirius groaned, and laughed, and kissed his Moony all over again.  It was Absolutely Brilliant.

[j45uk3]

이희승 - [THIRD]

genre: angst??

Characters: lee heeseung & gender!neutral oc

wc: 2k

synopsis: lee he-san, your best friend (who apparently is your crush) dies in a car accident. then one day, you see him across the street, is that him? Blinded by euphoria, you live the next few months happily. But then a secret lies between his identity, is this really lee he-san, the person you once knew or is it..

His twin brother, Lee Heeseung? 

others: mention of death, everything is fictional-remember that juseyo <3, extremely rushed ngl i had no idea what i was typing but ok-

i survived five whole years without him.

am i proud of that? no. of course not. can you even imagine walking inside your school greeted by looks of pity? and when you sit down everywhere you look something just feels missing? you would think to yourself, he would probably be here eating, he’s most likely to be here around this time. he would be here WITH ME laughing and having the times of our lives in this place. what hurts the most is when you look beside you and you see an empty chair filled with withering flowers and his picture. 

his picture YOU took.

five years? Without him, it felt like five decades. You would look into the mirror and see yourself aging, not only mentally but physically. the dark pits under you eyes would become more visible and the color of your skin fading oh ever so slowly. finding yourself five minutes outside your house and you already feel like your dying of the cold. you were lifeless. 

but then here he is, right in front of you. Clueless as ever, wearing the black leather jacket you gave him for his birthday. 

“h-he-san?” you managed a whisper despite your crippling mental state.

his brows furrowed and his eyes squinted, a look of worry spreading across his face. is this girl ok? his eyes said. and the answer to that? yes, you were walking on Cloud 9, you wouldn’t care for the world if you were to die right now at this moment as long as you saw him again. and he is here, again. 

is this a dream? Is this guy seriously he-san? reaching your hand forward (you knew it was creepy, but euphoria made you blind to anything at the moment) tears gathered on your eyes. Creeped out to the bone, the guy halted and grabbed your wrist - making you feel as delighted as ever. he is real! and his tight grip didn't even stop you from hugging him oh so tight he might even die right after he just showed up to you, not dead. 

Then the most surprising thing came out of his mouth,

“Hey, y/n” 

you froze on the spot not knowing what to say or do. Your best friends death ruined your entire life to the core. Yet seeing him here, saying your name made everything feel all cupcakes and rainbows. He’s alive, he remembers you, he remembers your name. Everything. The color on your face seemed to pop out of nowhere and you hugged him even tighter earning a laugh from him as his long arms hugged you back.

“I-im so glad you’re alive”

“Me too?” 

Chuckling, you two never seemed to let go. 

Months passed by and as expected he astonished everyone at his sudden reappearance, but not everything goes right in life, does it? He knew you loved watching any kind of drama and right after you saw him a list suddenly formed inside your mind. 

if the person, now reincarnated but reported to be dead, comes back to you drama cliches: 

First, either doesn’t remember you, or anything at all.

That’s crossed out from the list since he really remembers me, and... anything else.

Second, came back a complete psychopath or simply wasn’t dead the whole time.

I’ll cross this one out since he died right in front of me and they displayed his actual body in front of us at his funeral. Lastly,

Third, has an unusual vibe and doesn’t act like the person you once knew. 

What scares me is that, i can’t cross this one out.

“Honey?” your mom’s voice cut you off your thoughts.

You looked back, and let out a simple ‘hmm?’ 

“What are you doing with your book?” she called out, i checked my book out and noticed ink spread throughout the page as my hand turned pale gripping onto the pen. 

I looked back to my mom, and gave a small smile as i turned the page, “studying” 

Chuckling, she walked forward, going to me and lay on my bed behind me. It was silent for a few minutes while I focused on my homework. Obviously not being able to, I mentally groaned and slammed my book shut and looked at my mom. “Yes?-”

“Should i call He-san to study with you-”

“-NO” I snapped. My hand immediately separated from my body and my fingers spread showing a ‘stop’ sign. Wearing a fake smile, my mom reached her hand forward and intertwined both our fingers. 

“I will” then she shook her hand along with mine. She let go of my hand and walked to the door, at the same time I twisted back facing my desk again, flustered. I waited for the door to click, but it never came. Glancing back, I see my mom staring at me again.

“What is it this time-”

“Have this” then she threw a square shaped object, and me being the clumsy, sleepy as hell demon I am, I didn’t get to catch it as it fell in front of me. I gawked at my mom and she smiled again and waved her fingers, closing the door shut.

“What’s this” whispering to myself as I lowered my body to reach the object. As I did, I flipped it over and it showed a picture of 2 guys and a girl. The two boys made a heart as the girl stood in the middle cupping her face. Twins were what the boys were, identical twins. Scanning the picture one last time, I spot a name on the bottom left. 

Lee Heeseung.

Lee Heeseung?

Lee Heeseung.

Lee Heeseung.

Lee Heeseung.

Lee Heeseung.

He-san’s twin brother. The simple picture cured all your suspicions. He had a tattoo on his right hand, but He-san had a tattoo on his left. He-san’s allergic to shrimp, but the He-san who showed up happily hogged all the tempura when he visited your home.

Third, has an unusual vibe and doesn’t act like the person you once knew.

the weirdest one was when he told me...he loved me. 

The He-san who showed up isn’t He-san. 

It’s Lee Heeseung, his twin brother.

the door suddenly opened, with Heeseung entering the room. With him, my mother's head peeked from the door and an apologetic look spread across her face. you had to know she said as we made eye contact. I gave a nod of my head and a weak smile, she smiled back and closed the door. Click.

“So what do you want to do?-”

“heeseung”

Silence conquered the entire room, shifting my sight to the frozen boy infront of me my eyes heated up. “Heeseung, right?” I said.

No reply came from the boy. 

“So, you are heeseung.” nothing seemed to process in my mind as the boy simply avoided my eye contact. Nothing filled my mind except.

“Why?, why would you do that?” I weakly asked. “W-why would you act like he-san and give me such high hopes?!” standing up, rage coursed through my veins. 

“Have you ever even thought, what would i feel if i found out? Did you ever wonder on how soon we’ll be able to find out? Heeseung I’m your friend, i’m basically your family-”

“I know, and that’s what hurts the most.” “that you’re only just a friend with me, but when you’re with He-San… You treat him as he’s in love with you. And you with him.” he whole-heartedly admitted. His head was hung-low and regret laced through his voice.

“How bout you? Did you ever consider how i felt?” he snapped.

“What do you mean?-”

“I disappeared, right? You knew I suddenly disappeared out of nowhere, but what did you do? You went to He-san and confessed your feelings right after the news came out

And that one time He-san literally got lost IN A CLUB, and what did you do? You literally dragged me out of MY REUNION with my friends just to find him” 

His head shot up and his eyes swelled with tears “and you know that wasn’t all, so tell me. Did YOU ever think on how I felt with all that favoritism?” 

“I-i just wanted to feel important to you, and I didn’t know what to do. YOU are important to me, same with He-san. But I just didn’t feel the same with you, I didn’t feel any importance on myself whenever I see you treating He-San that way. So, As the mentally broken person I am, I became He-san knowing the consequences” 

No words came out of my mouth as I had yet to process everything he said. I didn’t know what to feel, shame? Guilt? Anger? Or sadness? If only I could just die right then and there I would, my mind was a mess and this whole conversation was a mess. Nothing seemed to sit right anymore. You would think on who really was at fault..is it me? Or is it him?

“But then again, here we are having this conversation. Everything seems to be moving so fast right? It’s been MONTHS. And throughout those months, I felt...important.

To you,” 

Complete silence, none of us spoke a word. Shivering silence I would say. None of us made eye contact, and we made not a single sound but it wasn’t awkward, it was scary. You could feel the rage and anger radiating through the silence. So I did the most logical thing to do,

 Run. just simply get out of the room, house actually. And run. To where?

He-san’s grave. 

I dropped on my knees and my lips tremble tremendously. Taking quick breaths I looked up trying to contain my tears. Looking back down,  it met me with his name engraved on his headstone.

Lee He-san 2001-2021

A salty taste travelled to my lips and i wiped it immediately. My eyes got puffy and my eyesight blurred. My head throbbed loudly and all I could do was drop as my arms supported my entire body. 

“Y/N!” a voice called behind me.

“Y/N!” Heeseung’s voice called me. It was unclear since the noise of the cars honking and my crying blocked my hearing. He also seemed to be far away.

And I didn’t even dare to look back.

“Y/N!” the voice grew louder and i wiped my tears. Looking back, I see Heeseung on the other side of the road. He had a small smile, and he was waving his hand. Guilt corrupted my mind as I stood up and walked to the sidewalk and screamed 

“Go away, I-I don’t deserve to be your friend.” 

He didn’t reply. The pedestrian light turned green, and he walked towards me. The pedestrian was long, and I simply took the chance and ran away again. “Y/N!” His footsteps were loud as he ran going towards me. 

As I reached the middle of the road, a hand grabbed my shoulder and pulled me to turn to the other side. “y/n, listen to me” 

“I-im sorry,” i cut him off “i didn’t know that’s what you felt, I’m such a bad friend, and I was so clueless. I was probably so blinded by-”

“y/n, listen to me. I-it’s fine. I don’t care. As long as we’re together like this and the misunderstanding is clear, everything’s going to be fine. He-san wouldn’t want us to be living like this. I’m sure he would want us to be happy, I-i’m sorry too. I know that was very selfish of me to do that…”

Tears seemed to gather on the bottom of my eyes again, and Heeseung pulled me into his chest and his arms wrapped around my upper body. I hugged him back, breaking the hug right after. “L-let’s just go back to He-san ok?” 

I took a couple of breaths and nodded my head. We were going to walk to the side-walk until a stranger’s voice screamed “KIDS WATCH OUT” 

We both looked forward, and they met us with a truck's front as its honks ringed in my mind. We stood there frozen, and I felt a push from my side and I moved away and my body thumped to the other side of the road. My eyesight was blurry and a huge CRASH was what I heard, and before i knew it my eyesight went blank. 

"y-y/n??" "y/n? y/-"

my eyes shot open and I shot up from the bed. Looking around all i saw was white. rubbing my eyes, doctors, wheelchairs and nurses surrounded me. I looked to where the voice came from and was greeted by my mother. My lips felt dry and I was still wearing my outfit from earlier...earlier...

the truck..heeseung-

"where's heeseung?"

[bernadineisreborn]

It’s You

Fred Weasley x Reader

A/N: Should I be writing Reality? Yes. Did I have a few dreams about Fred and George and decide to write them instead? Yes. Is the Yule Ball overdone in HP fanfic? Yes. But here you go anyway. Please, stay safe amid corona and if you are protesting!

Warnings: Alcohol is consumed. Sex is referenced. Kisses happen. 

Word count: 8.6k, my longest ever for one post I think!

My Masterlist

While you and George were easily best friends, you and Fred Weasley had a more complicated history.

It all started when you were younger.

Your father was a wizard, but the nature of his relationship with your mother was short-lived. Really short lived. They met at a small pub in London, where your mother worked. Your father must have had one-time business on the other side of the brick wall behind the Leaky Cauldron, because your mother spent the night with him and never saw him again.

She didn’t mind though. She was ecstatic when she found out she was pregnant, never mind her being single. Raising you as alone was, understandably, very difficult, but she was never one to give up. She was clueless to the secret world that your father had belonged to. Until, one day, you sneezed and broke every glass in the room.

You were six at the time, and your mother had no idea what to do. You had displayed small signs of magic before, but those could be written off as coincidence. This glass-shattering sneeze, however, could not.

It was a week later that you summoned a cupcake into your chubby fist while out shopping. Your mother was horrified. Luckily, there was another witch in the store.

“Well, wasn’t that lovely!” she exclaimed, her red-orange hair falling in front of her face as she bent down to your level, “But best not let the muggles see, hmm?” She looked to your mum, then, a small smile on her face. You mother’s face was still frozen, eyes wide and mouth hanging open. The red-headed woman was smart enough to notice that your mum was, in fact, one of those very muggles. She had absolutely no idea of the magical world, and no idea how to care for a daughter who was summoning cupcakes at will.

She smiled, and extended a hand, “Oh dear, I’ve forgotten to introduce myself. I’m Molly.”

Your mum smiled faintly, “I’m M/N.”

Molly hummed, her expression nothing but understanding as she looked to you, “And who’s this young dear?”

“I’m Y/N!” you said, taking a bite from the cupcake.

Molly laughed, “Your daughter seems quite special! Don’t worry, they usually start around this age, it’s perfectly normal. Come now, follow me.” The woman ushered you and your mother toward the door, leaving her groceries abandoned in the aisle. After all, Molly Weasley knows to help a wizard in need, and you and your mum were very clearly in need.

Once outside, she attempted to explain herself. “I am in town today dropping off some things for Arthur, my husband. He works at the Ministry, you see. I’ve left the children at home, but Bill’s old enough to watch the others now,” she glanced at you, “How old is she?”

Your mother’s voice was hoarse, though she wasn’t entirely untrusting of the strange, kind woman, “She’s six.”

“Ah, yes, what a darling age. I’ve got a pair of twins who are just that!” She glanced at you again, “Now, that wasn’t the first time Y/N’s made something like this happen, is it?”

----

An hour later, you and your mother were sitting in Molly’s home. Molly was explaining things to your mother, who had taken out a pen and paper and was writing diligent notes.

Molly had introduced you to her children before she had sat down with your mother. Much to your dismay, most of them were boys. There was Ginny, of course, but she was only three.

You were led outside by the adorable tot, to where the two oldest boys had picked up broomsticks and started flying around on them. You were amazed. Ginny, unfortunately, didn’t seem to know how the brooms were flying. Begrudgingly, you made your way to the other four children, who were sitting in the grass and cheering their brothers on. Well, three of them were. One of them, an older boy with horn-rimmed glasses, was reading a book.

You tapped on the nearest shoulder, “Excuse me.”

They turned to you. “Want to watch them play quidditch with us?” asked two of the boys in perfect unison. Their red hair was just as flame-like as their mother’s.

You giggled and sat, “Sure. What’s quidditch?”

Their eyes turned wide at this. Again, they responded together, “Only the greatest sport ever invented!”

----

Thus, your destiny was set. Every Sunday, you visited the Weasley household, where your mother learned everything there was to know about magic, Arthur Weasley learned everything he could about your mother’s “fascinating” muggle life, and you became fast friends with the twins.

Both twins, in fact.

Fred, George, and yourself were inseparable troublemakers, spending every second of time with each other to plan your next great escapade.

And so things continued until your fourth year of Hogwarts.

You expected the school year to start as the last three had, a bit of troublemaking and a lot of fun with your two favorite boys.

But things were different. Awkward.

Fred was, suddenly, funnier and taller and more handsome. George was, too. But it was Fred that filled your 14-year-old stomach with simultaneous dread and excitement whenever you spotted him walking your way.

It was fine, though. You were keeping yourself in check. Until one night, in the Gryffindor common room, you were playing a wizarding version of hide and seek.

George was appointed the “seeker,” so you, Fred, Angelina Johnson, Lee Jordan, and the other involved Gryffindors dispersed. You had been wandering the corridor for a few minutes when you heard something.

You froze, hoping on everything holy that it wasn’t Filch or Mrs. Norris or Peeves or the Bloody Baron.

A freckled hand wrapped over your mouth, muffling your startled scream, and spun you around. Fred was standing in front of you, smiling, “Don’t worry, Y/N. It’s only me.”

He removed his hand, and you smiled too, at ease. His smile was so damn contagious and handsome and—

“What do you say?”

You refocused your eyes, which had gone hazy on a freckle near the corner of Fred’s mouth, “Hmm?”

“Honestly, I said, do you want to hide together? Two heads are better than one, I reckon.”

You nodded, and he tugged you along. You walked carefully, peeking around corners and tiptoeing as you went.

Fred wasn’t being quite as quiet as you would have liked, and he was known to get caught, so you shoved at him, “Hey, you big git, do you think you could be any louder?”

He arranged a faux puzzled expression, “Louder? Hmm, yeah, I think I could.” He started stomping his feet and whistling; the sound echoed through the empty corridors. He spun to walk backwards and maintain eye contact with you as he did.

You rolled your eyes, “Ha-ha. Very mature, Fred. I’m sorry I don’t want to lose.”

“Mature? You’re playing hide-and-seek!” He poked at your face.

You swatted him away, “It’s not muggle hide and seek! There’s plenty of danger. We’re in a castle, and it’s dark, and there are ghosts, and there is Filch,” you frowned at him, “And anyway, so are you!”

He grinned, “You’re so competitive. You should try out for quidditch.”

“You know just as well as I do that I can barely fly.”

His ginger eyebrows furrowed in thought, “True.” Then, his smile returned, “Maybe we could let you ride on the back of my broom and kick at people who pass us.”

You laughed, too, at that ridiculous image.

Just then, Fred backed into a display case, making a rather thunderous sound.

“Well, that ought to alert Georgie. Follow me.” Fred dashed around a few corners, before clambering into a small closet. You entered after him, obviously out of breath from the run.

The closet was even more cramped than it looked from the outside, and Fred read your expression as you squished yourself against him. “Merlin, if we’re going to try you out for the team, you’re going to need to start going for a jog every now and again.”

You punched him as well as you could in the tight space.

“Yes! That’s the spirit, Y/N! Now, you just need to be able to balance.” He mimed you sitting on the back of a broomstick, punching at air.

You laughed in spite of yourself.

It was then that you realized your face was entirely too close to Fred’s. He seemed to notice in the same instant, because for all of his never-ending jokes and your unrelenting teasing, you were both silent.

Finally, he spoke up, his voice a whisper, “Do you think he’ll find us?” If you didn’t know better, you’d think Fred’s eyes were locked on your lips, but it was dark and you were probably mistaken.

“Probably,” you replied, just as quiet, “Eventually.” You shifted a little, uncomfortable, and ended up, somehow, even closer to Fred than you were before.

George burst in then, looking rather triumphant.

“Fred! Y/N! Found you…” he glanced between you, noting your position, “Were you two about to snog?”

Maybe you had been about to, maybe you hadn’t. But you pushed Fred roughly away and stepped out of your hiding place. “Ew, no. Fred’s a git. The cupboard was just small.”

You had no way of knowing how your words stung Fred, who brushed his hand through his carrot top hair and said, “Yeah? Well at least I can stay on a broomstick long enough to get five feet in the air!”

You scoffed and followed them down the hall, back through the portrait hole, “Terrible comeback, Weasley.” You turned up your nose at him, “And not even true.”

Fred laughed. “You’re right, it’s closer to ten.”

“Hey!”

----

Every time you thought about the incident after that, your cheeks grew hot of their own accord. You were sure your feelings for Fred were one sided. After all, you were clumsy and had known him since you were kids. He probably thought of you like a sister.

So, in a classic attempt to hide your feelings, you started taking every opportunity to get on Fred’s nerves. By your 6thyear, your actions had morphed your relationship so much, that what you and Fred had was only a shadow of your former friendship. It pained you, yes, but you couldn’t risk straining your relationship with both of the twins because of idiotic teenaged hormones.

“Miss L/N, if you could please direct your attention to the front of the classroom, it would be appreciated,” drawled Snape.

You flushed, your head snapping to Snape, who was explaining Golpalott’s Third Law at the front of the Potion’s classroom. You had been staring at Fred’s side profile across the lab table, daydreaming a bit. Now, both Fred and George, who were sitting next to each other and across from you and Angelina, were looking at you.

“Sorry, Professor,” you mumbled, and the twins snickered.

Angelina poked you, her features pulled into a loving, teasing smirk. She scribbled quickly onto a corner of her parchment, ripped it off, and passed it to you: “Thinking about pulling someone into an empty hallway and snogging them to death, dear Y/N?”

If it was possible, your cheeks burned even hotter. You glanced to Fred, but he was dutifully watching the lecture, if a bit bored looking. You grabbed the note, “ANGELINA!!! Please, spare me! L”

You slid it over to her. She laughed under her breath and began scribbling, “Maybe you ought to watch us practice today??? Might help visualize those fantasies???”

Before you could take it back and write to her just how absurd she was being, and that you had been thinking about nothing of the sort, the scrap of parchment was snatched by Fred.

His eyebrows raised as he read the note. You prepared for him to laugh, to say ‘Finally! I knew you were in love with me! Ha!’ But, he just frowned and turned away. George grabbed the paper next, and when he read it, he shot you a look. George definitely knew how you felt about Fred. He was your best friend, and he had caught you gazing dreamily Fred’s way quite a few times, though you had always denied anything he accused you of. You shrugged, trying to play it off like nothing.

“Miss L/N! What about Weasley is so interesting that you think yourself above my lecture?”

You shrunk into your seat, “Nothing. It won’t happen again, Professor.”

----

After Potions, you gathered your bags and slunk shamefully after Fred, George, and Angelina in the halls.  Technically, because of the Triwizard Tournament, there were no quidditch games or practices. But, some of the Gryffindor team was meeting up to practice when time allowed, to stay in shape for next season. Angelina, Fred, and George were on the team, so of course, you spent the practices with them, watching them fly, doing homework, etc.

When you had gathered at the Pitch, you began feeble attempts at writing a Charms essay. Mostly, though, you were distracted by your friends. Angelina really was a great flyer, she was dodging almost every bludger George sent her way, and Fred was… sigh.

“Oi! L/N! Want to come play for a bit? We need one more to make it even!” called George.

You shrugged, “Sure! As long as I can be on defense!”

Though you still struggled, your flying skills had made a significant improvement since your fourth year, due to flying lessons from your friends, which were motivated by Fred’s (unfortunately accurate) teasing.

A few minutes later, you were hovering uneasily around the three rings on your team’s side. George, your teammate, was darting around with Fred and Angelina on the other side of the pitch. You zoned out as you watched them. Fred’s shirt was flying up a bit in the wind, a hint of his abdomen on display, and you were trying very hard not to stare. Not that it mattered. From here, he wouldn’t notice if you admired him a bit, would he?

Fred swung his bat, the bludger aimed at George. At the last second, though, his gaze turned toward you, your eyes locked with his, and his bat swung a bit too far.

Suddenly, the bludger was coming your way, far too quickly for you to move.

When it hit your stomach full force, you grunted, but managed to keep your grip on the broom’s wooden handle. Then, you vomited your breakfast onto the field, dozens of yards below you.

----

“I said, I’m fine!” you exclaimed. Fred was the first to swoop onto the grass after you had. You were dry heaving and trying to hold Fred off. The last thing you needed was for him to watch you puke. “I’m not hurt, it just hit me in the stomach.”

“Yeah, I saw that part, didn’t I?” he scoffed, though you could tell he felt a little guilty from the way he was hovering over you.

“Fred!” you groaned, “Please, just give me a minute! I’m perfectly fine.” You groaned as you dry heaved again, your puke reflex fully triggered, “Why do you care anyway?” you asked, under your breath.

“What?”

You held up a finger to him, gesturing for him to wait as you dry heaved again, and then stood up. “I said, why do you care anyway?” You narrowed your eyes, “Were you trying to hit me?”

His guilty expression turned incredulous, “What? Are you barking mad? Of course not!”

You shrugged and crossed your arms, “Well, I saw you look at me while you were swinging and it seemed like you were.”

He blushed, “I was only looking at you because you were trying to distract me! Trying to help George win!”

“For Merlin’s sake, how was I distracting you? I wasn’t even moving!”

His blush deepened, “I don’t know!” he sputtered, his eyes darting over you, “Your shirt is too bright!”

You were furious, and he was getting in your personal space. Your shirt was, in fact, the standard Gryffindor burgundy, and definitely not bright. “My WHAT?” At this point, George and Angelina had landed their brooms as well, and were taking tentative steps your way as you pushed at Fred’s chest, “Fred Weasley, you are the absolute WORST—”

You were suddenly being restrained by two lanky arms—George’s—and dragged away.

“Alright, I think that’s enough of that lover’s quarrel for one day, don’t you, Angelina?” George quipped, guiding you back to the castle, “I’ll take Y/N back to the common room and make sure she’s okay, let’s say we meet in the Great Hall for dinner?”

Angelina nodded, and before you knew it you were being led through the halls of Hogwarts to 6th year Gryffindor boy’s dormitories.

“George, he hates me! I just know it!”

“Quit being so dramatic, woman, he doesn’t hate you. You just have a talent for getting on each other’s nerves.” He sat you on his bed, forcing you down by the shoulders, and went to his trunk.

“He aimed that bludger at me!”

“He definitely did not aim at you, he was probably just…” he trailed off, speaking under his breath.

“Probably just what?”

“I don’t know,” he was rummaging haphazardly through his and Fred’s trunks, “He was probably just distracted!”

You gasped, growing angry at your favorite twin, “You’re taking his side? I should have known—”

He stopped you, “I’m not taking his side,” he held up the purple end of a puking pastille, “Here, take this.”

You swallowed the gummy, and instantly, all of your queasiness vanished. “Thanks,” you muttered.

“I wish you two would just kiss and make up,” said George, who had sat next to you on the mattress, “It’d make things a whole lot easier for Angelina and me.”

Your cheeks flamed, “Like I want that to happen.”

George rolled his eyes, “Come on, Y/N. You can’t lie to me.” He nudged your shoulder and wiggled his eyebrows. “I know all.”

Your blush deepened, but you laughed, “For Merlin’s sake, I knew your ego was inflated beyond repair, but I hardly think three OWLs qualifies one as omniscient.”

George and you were near cackling a few minutes later, and you were feeling very glad to have him to cheer you up, when Fred entered.

He stopped in the doorway, staring at the two of you as your laughter faded, his expression stormy, “Sorry to interrupt.” He grabbed something from his trunk, and slammed the door on his way out.

George grimaced, “Doesn’t look like he’ll be too happy with me later,” he said, his eyes locked on the closed door.

Your eyebrows furrowed, confused, “Why do you say that?”

George turned back to you, an easy smile replacing the grimace, “No reason, love.” He stood up, “Come on, let’s go to dinner.”

----

In the Great Hall, you sat in between George and Angelina, as usual. Fred was sat on George’s other side. He had barely looked at you as you came in. Rude, you thought, He could have at least apologized.

The conversation between the Gryffindor girls was as it had been all of the other meals recently: gossip about the Yule Ball. Some Ravenclaw girl had been asked by a boy from Durmstrang, Alicia Spinnet informed you. Neither you nor Angelina had been asked yet, though you were hoping you would be soon.

Ideally, of course, you’d be asked by Fred, who would confess that he’d loved you this whole time, and that he wanted nothing more than to dance the night away at a romantic Christmas-themed ball. Of course, currently, you were mad at him. He’d need to apologize first.

You’d be alright with anyone, so long as you didn’t have to go alone. Not that it really mattered. Worst case scenario, you’d strut into the Ball with Angelina, both of you dateless, but looking good enough that all of the boys who’d brought dates abandoned them to dance with you.

You nudged George, “Hey. Are you planning on asking anyone to the Ball?”

He met your eyes and shrugged, barely chewing a hunk of roast before swallowing. “Depends. Are you going with anyone?” He nudged you back and winked.

You were laughing, well aware that he was kidding, when George was shoved into you by Fred, who looked at you very seriously, and then looked at George. There seemed to be some sort of twin telepathy because before you knew it, George was apologizing and Fred was turning away, his shoulders hunched.

You nudged George again, more subtle this time, and whispered, “What was that all about?”

He shrugged and whispered back, “Freddie here is in a sour mood. He hasn’t got a date yet.”

You shot him a look, “Neither do you, George.” Just then, Cho Chang and Cedric Diggory strolled into the Great Hall, arm in arm, looking very pleased with each other, rosy blushes dusting both of their cheeks. You sighed and put your chin in your hand as you watched them walk by, “And neither do I.”

You sat for a moment, thinking about George’s joking proposition to you. He and you had no feelings for each other, you were sure. In fact, you were relatively positive that he had a crush on Angelina. You were also pretty sure that these feelings, should they ever be expressed, would be returned. They would make a cute couple.

Anyway, it wouldn’t be so bad to go to the Ball with George. He was one of your best friends, he was funny, he was chivalrous. He would be a good date. Maybe I’ll ask him to go with me, as friends, you thought, if neither of us finds anyone else.

“Excuse me, Miss L/N?”

You turned, and behind you was a handsome Beauxbatons student, in his blue uniform. “Erm, hello. How can I help you?”

His smile grew, and you were vaguely aware that the entire Gryffindor table was watching the exchange. Your heartbeat sped up.

He eyed the table, apparently also noticing the attention on you two, “I was hoping you would like to chat privately for a minute? In the courtyard, maybe?”

Your cheeks grew hot, and Angelina shoved you out of your seat, speaking for you, “Yes, of course! She’d love to!”

You smiled at him, and turned back to your friends. George shot you a thumbs up, and Angelina was grinning. Fred’s mood, however, showed no improvement.

“All right, yeah, I’ll go.” He gestured for you to walk ahead of him, and together, you walked  out of the Great Hall.

“Miss L/N,” he addressed you again, holding out a polite hand, “My name is Louis, it is a pleasure to introduce myself formally.”

You took his hand, and instead of shaking it, he brought it to his lips and placed a delicate kiss on your knuckles. Your face was flaming, “Erm, yeah. I’ve seen you around. You can just call me Y/N.”

He laughed lightly, “Okay then, Y/N,” you were now in the courtyard, and there was a light snow falling. You shivered, and he handed you his cloak, “Please, stay warm. How are you?”

You took the cloak gratefully, “I’m okay, I—

Before you could get another word out, the courtyard was enveloped in a blinding blackness. You panicked a bit, reaching your arms out to feel for something solid to hold on to, and soon found a pair of outstretched arms. Assuming they were Louis’, you grabbed on for dear life, and allowed yourself to be dragged back into Hogwarts.

When you were out of the blackness, you scoffed, watching it disappear behind you, “I’m sorry, Louis. That must have been my friend, George. He probably thought it would be—” You turned, and were surprised to see Fred standing next to you, and not Louis. “—funny,” you finished. “Fred? What are you…” You looked back out to the courtyard, where Louis’ form was beginning to reappear. Then, Fred was tugging you toward the moving staircases.

“Fred!” You shoved his arm off of yours. “What are you doing?”

“Leading you back to the Common Room, obviously,” there was a small smirk on his face, as he grabbed your arm and once again tried to guide you.

You yanked your arm away, “I can find my way back perfectly well on my own, thanks!” He shrugged, and started walking. Despite yourself, you followed. “Why in Merlin’s name did you do that?”

His smirk returned, “Do what?”

“Throw that Peruvian Instant Darkness Powder! I was having a nice conversation!”

“Oh that,” he glanced back at you, his smile growing at your infuriated expression, “Louis seemed shady.”

“He seemed WHAT?” You were seething at this point, “Fred, I think he was going to ask me to the Ball,” much to your dismay, your tone came out more disappointed than angry.

At this, Fred’s expression shifted into one of mild annoyance, “Don’t worry, I’m sure someone else will ask you. Louis, though, was up to no good.” Fred looked back to you again, “He probably just wanted to sleep with you.”

You stopped in your tracks, “As if that is the only reason he’d be interested in taking me to the Ball? As if I have nothing else going for me?” Fred had gone too far this time.

He stopped too, and cringed, “That is not what I meant.”

You held your nose up, “Well, that’s what it sounded like.”

It was quiet for a moment. Fred sighed. “Look, I just have a bad feeling about him. He seems like a right wanker, alright?”

Fred’s expression was genuine, but you couldn’t help yourself, “Louis was being perfectly chivalrous.”

Fred held his hands up, accepting defeat, “Alright, fine. I was wrong, and I’m sorry.”

You sniffled.

He continued, “And I never apologized earlier, for hitting you with the bludger.” He ruffled the back of his hair with his hand, and the gesture was so very awkward, so sincere, that you found yourself forgiving him far faster than you should. “I didn’t mean to. I’m not sure how it happened.”

After a second of contemplation, you punched his muscled shoulder, your resolve thoroughly broken, “I suppose it’s fine. Not your fault you have terrible aim,” you cracked a smile.

He smiled too, laughing under his breath. For a second, it felt like the old days, when you and Fred could laugh freely and tease each other without starting a war. You felt oddly nostalgic, and before you could fully consider your words, you blurted, “What happened to us?”

His smile faded, and you instantly regretted saying something. His eyes filled with an intensity that you hadn’t seen in them in a while, and you were strangely reminded of the hide-and-seek closet from those years ago.

Before he could reply, Angelina and George rounded the corner, George’s arm slung over Angelina’s shoulders. “Oi!” he called, “We wondered where you’d gone off to Fred!” He smiled at you and ruffled your hair when he reached the two of you, “You’ve found our dear Y/N, I see. So, have you got yourself a date to the Yule Ball?”

You glanced to Fred, who looked suddenly guilty. “No, Louis probably just wanted to hook up with me. You know, because of my fantastically proportioned figure and extraordinary facial features.” You smirked Fred’s way, an action not unnoticed by George. Fred rolled his eyes.

Angelina gasped, “What makes you think that?”

You shrugged and smiled, “Intuition. Don’t worry, Ang, he isn’t worth it.”

----

A few days later, you were standing by the fire in the Common Room, talking to Angelina.

“I’m not sure what the team will look like next year without Oliver,” she was saying, “He was really the glue to the team, though he was a bit sexist, calling us ‘lads’ all the time. Do I look like a lad to you?”

You shook your head, agreeing with her. Just then, a pair of bright orange heads wandered through the portrait hole and sat with Harry, Ron, and Hermione. The twins appeared to be talking mostly to Ron.

“…And with the year off, too. It’s not going to be good, Y/N. I’ll be captain so I’ll be responsible…”

You tried to listen to your friend as she spoke about quidditch. Fred and George were still talking to Ron. Fred looked relaxed, sure of himself. Confidence, you thought, is a good look on a man. As if they had felt you watching them, all five people sat at the table turned your way. You and Fred made brief eye contact, and he seemed to be thinking something through. Your relationship with him had been improving a little since your interaction in the hall the other day. Though you still didn’t have a date to the Yule Ball, and were starting to wonder if you should seek Louis out for another ‘private chat.’ Maybe he’d ask again if prompted.

Fred seemed to decide something, and then he was shouting, “Oi! Angelina!”

Angelina pulled her gaze from you and her thoughts from quidditch, “What?”

“Want to come to the Ball with me?” called Fred, eyebrows wiggling mischievously. Your heart dropped. Of course he’d want to ask Angelina. She’s beautiful, she’s kind, she’s athletic, she’s smart. Why would he ask you when you’d only just started getting along again a few days ago?

George glanced to Fred then, looking a bit affronted. Angelina shot you an anxious look. You forced the jealous thoughts from your mind, and smiled lightly at her, shrugging. “All right, then,” she said, turning back to you.

“Oi! Y/N!” you turned back to the table, where George had just called your name. At this point, the entire Common Room was watching the exchange. Fred’s attention was on George.

“What is it, George?” you asked, not having to guess too hard at what he was about to say.

He smiled, “Want to come to the Ball with me?” his grin was growing by the second, “I’ll make it worth your while.”

You rolled your eyes at your friend, but couldn’t help a smile from sliding onto your face, “Sure thing.”

You turned back to Angelina, who looked nervous, probably thinking you’d be mad that she was going with Fred. You smiled at her, “That was weird.”

Her shoulders relaxed, “Sure was. Can’t expect anything different from that pair, though.”

Alicia Spinnet and Katie Bell rushed over to you and Angelina, immediately interested in your plans for the Ball.

And you couldn’t blame them. You could tell, this was going to be very interesting.

----

On the day of the Yule Ball, Hogwarts was buzzing.

The castle grounds were perfectly white and snowy and the students were excitable. Even most of the teachers could be seen with a spring in their step, humming a Christmas tune.

You and Angelina were darting around your dormitory, half dressed, hair half up, makeup partially done.

“Y/N, have you seen my shoes?” called Angelina from the other side of the room. You glanced at your reflection in the mirror, and then around the room, which looked as though a swarm of pixies had been through it.

“Yeah,” you replied, picking up your wand and flicking it so the elegant high-heels hovered in the air, “Here.”

“Thanks,” she responded, letting out a huff.

Your dress was beautiful: the exact length, texture, and color you had been imagining it would be since you heard Hogwarts was hosting a Yule Ball. And Angelina looked great, too. She was wearing a velvety plum colored dress that perfectly accentuated her athletic frame.

You pinned a few hairs out of your face as she slipped on her shoes.

“Erm, Y/N?”

“What’s wrong?” you asked. Angelina’s pretty face was twisted in an anxious expression.

“Well, nothing is wrong, exactly, but…” she trailed off, looking at you in the mirror you were using to get ready. “Well, I wanted to make sure you’re okay with me going to the Ball with Fred.” She looked nervous, and a bit guilty.

You laughed, a bobby pin stuck between your teeth, “As long as you’re okay that I’m going with George.”

Her expression stilled, her eyes grew wide, “But—I—”

“I know you like him, Ang.”

She crossed her arms in front of her chest, pouting, “I do not.”

“Could have fooled me,” you retorted.  

She frowned, “There’s no reason I would be mad! Why would I be mad? I’m not mad.”

You sent her a smile, “Nor am I mad that you’re going with Fred,” you eyed her through the mirror, “And even though you’re insisting that you don’t like him, I’m pretty sure George likes you.”

Her eyes grew wide, and thoughtful, with this information, “Really?”

You nodded.

There was silence for a few moments.

“They’ve really done a number on us, haven’t they?” she asked you, not completely serious, but there was a certain weight behind her words.

“Yeah, they have,” you agreed, “Maybe we should ditch them and just go together.”

She laughed, “Maybe we should.”

You finished with your hair and turned to face her. “I’m ready to head down, how about you?”

“Me too,” she looked you up and down appreciatively, “Damn, girl! I can’t wait to see Fred’s face when he sees you in that!”

You scoffed, “Yeah right! It’ll be nothing compared to George’s when he sees you!” You took her arm and descended the stairs together.

Fred and George did, indeed, do double takes when they saw you and Angelina.

They had been standing nonchalantly at the bottom of the staircases, dressed in robes that were clearly hand-me-downs, but far nicer than their usual attire nonetheless. George spotted you first, grinning your way before his gaze slid over to Angelina. His eyes widened and his jaw slackened as he watched her walking towards him. You felt smug, you knew they had a thing for each other.

Fred was watching Angelina, too, a small grin on his face. When he glanced at you, his grin fell away and his eyes turned intense again. You wondered if you’d done something to offend him.

In perfect unison, they spoke, “Hello, ladies!”

“Hey, George,” you smiled at your date.

He mock bowed your way, “Merlin’s beard, it’s going to be hard to behave myself tonight,” he joked, wiggling his eyebrows, “You look great, darling.” He slipped an elegant arrangement of flowers over your wrist: a corsage.

“Aw, thanks, George. You didn’t have to do this.”

He was grinning, “I promised I’d make tonight worth your while.” Above everything else, you were glad to be going to the Ball with George. He was easy: tonight would be fun and stress-free.

A throat cleared, “Y/N.”

You turned toward the voice, “Hi, Fred.” You observed his outfit—a yellow vest, a slim bowtie—he looked very handsome, “You clean up nicely.”

His expression was still solid. Stormy, almost. “You’re not so bad yourself, fantastically proportioned figure and extraordinary facial features and all.” he smirked, referencing your comment from the other night. His eyes trailed over your body shamelessly—almost as if he were checking you out.

You laughed, but your cheeks were burning, “Thanks.” Next to you, George and Angelina seemed to be having a similar exchange. You smiled at them.

George turned back to you, then, holding out his arm for you to take, “Alright. You ready, Freddie?”

“Ready as I’ll ever be, mate.”

The four of you made your way to the Yule Ball in pairs, Fred and Angelina were arm in arm just as you and George were.

The Great Hall was barely recognizable. The walls of the Hall had all been covered in frost, and were sparkling and silver. There were garlands of mistletoe and ivy hung from wall to wall and the trick ceiling displayed a perfectly starry night. There were dozens of small tables arranged neatly around the room, in place of the house tables, each one with a lantern for light. It was breathtaking.

You squeezed George’s arm in excitement, and moved to sit at a table with some other Gryffindors.

When the formal dinner was over, you danced. You danced a lot and without any thought to how other people were perceiving you. As you and George—and Fred and Angelina—made your way through the Hall, the crowds parted, giving you plenty of space as if they thought you might run them over. You were having a lot of fun. As you had predicted, George was an excellent date.

“Need more beverage?” he asked, and you nodded, him and Fred leaving to refill your drinks.

When they came back, George handed you your drink and winked, “This one’s got something special in it.” His eyes were full of their usual mischief, and he must have noted your unsure expression, because he rolled his eyes, “Oh relax, it’s not poisoned! It’s just got a bit of firewhisky in it.”

You grinned, “Alright then,” and downed it.

George whistled, “Careful there, Y/N. We’ve got all night.”

You laughed. Then, The Weird Sisters’ song slowed until it wasn’t something you could dance to in the way you and George had been dancing previously. You set your empty cup down, “Want to dance?”

He smiled at you, a friendly sort of smile, and downed his drink, too. “I’d love to dance. I have the most beautiful date in school.”

You snorted, “Oh please,” but you put your head on his shoulder, and settled your arms around his waist. His arms rested over yours at the small of your back, your torsos pushed together. You swayed with him for a minute without talking. You could feel the firewhisky making its way through your system.

A few feet away, Fred and Angelina were dancing, too. Angelina’s arms were tucked behind Fred’s neck and his were on her waist. They weren’t as cuddled up as you and George were; Fred was saying something to make Angelina laugh.

You were saddened by this sight. You found yourself wishing you were here tonight with Fred instead, and then felt immediately guilty because George had made such an effort to be a gentleman. You sighed.

“What is it, darling?” asked George, his voice concerned and close to your ear with how you were dancing.

“It’s nothing,” you lamented, feeling rather sorry for yourself. “Does Fred like Angelina?”

George was silent.

You let out a humorless chuckle. “I mean, he must. He asked her to be his date tonight.”

George pulled away from you, just enough to look at your face, his expression was, for once, serious, “Well, I asked you to be my date. And no offense, Y/N, but I don’t have feelings for you.”

“Oh.” You frowned, not having considered this information, “I mean, I know you don’t. I don’t have feelings for you, either,” you giggled.

George’s mouth twitched, “In fact, I have feelings for someone else,” he admitted.

Your eyes widened, and your mouth turned upwards, “Really? Well, it just so happens that I also have feelings for someone else.”

He rolled his eyes, “I never would have guessed. You’re so subtle.”

You scoffed, faking offense, “Well, it’s not like you’re slyest in the bunch either, George.”

He eyed something behind you, “What do you say… that we stir the pot a bit?”

“What do you mean?”

He looked back to you, clearly hatching some evil plan, “I mean, what do you say we make them a bit jealous?”

You narrowed your eyes, “I’m listening…”

He grinned, again glancing somewhere behind you, “You see, if I were to dip you,” he tugged you to the side, and let you fall a bit towards the floor, “and snog you, just for a second” he added, noting your distressed expression, “I bet it would get a reaction from anyone who has feelings for you.”

You were confused, “Who has feelings for me?”

His grin remained intact, “Just trust me, love.”

You nodded, trusting him without question as he leaned in and closed the gap between you. When his lips landed on yours, they were firm, and chaste. You felt no spark, no electricity. But, you felt the same feeling of safety that you always felt around George.

When he pulled away, he winked, and helped you back into a standing position.

“Well, that happened,” you remarked, not feeling much of anything.

“It sure did,” he agreed.

“Did your plan work?” you asked.

He looked again to a spot located just over your shoulder, “We’ll just have to wait to find out.”

Curiosity filled you, “What are you looking at?” You moved to turn your head, and follow his gaze, but he stopped you with a hand on your cheek.

“Trust me, Y/N.”

----

A few songs later, you and Angelina were sitting at an empty table. Fred and George had gone to talk to Ludo Bagman, for some reason, leaving you here.

As you sat, you looked around the room. Harry and Ron seemed rather lonely, sitting by themselves, Padma and Parvati nowhere to be found. Ron’s robes were very traditional, frilly, and a bit gross looking, and you felt a twinge of pity for him. Harry, on the other hand, looked quite nice in expensive-looking emerald robes.

You pointed them out to Angelina, “Don’t they look just miserable?”

She nodded, “Poor Harry. Ron’s in a horrible mood tonight.”

“Why is that?”

She looked back to you, “Did you see Hermione Granger?”

You shook your head.

“Well, Alicia was telling me that she overheard her and Ron talking the other night. Ron wondered who Hermione was taking to the Ball, but she wouldn’t tell him. Turns out she’s here with Krum. And she looks absolutely stunning. Almost rivals the Delacour girl.”

You frowned, “Well, why’s that got Ron in a bad mood?”

Angelina raised her eyebrows at you, “You really are clueless, aren’t you? Ron definitely likes her.”

“No way.”

“Yeah, I’ve seen them interacting, it’s pretty obvious most of the time. Too much sexual tension for there to be no feelings.”

You giggled, “Well, I can’t be completely clueless. I noticed George liking you.”

She frowned, “Speaking of George. Did I see you guys kissing?”

You blushed, “Oh. Right. Please don’t be mad!” you gave her a very apologetic expression, “He said it was to ‘stir the pot.’ Whatever that means. Apparently, there’s someone here that he thought would get jealous.”

“Why would I be mad?” Angelina’s perfectly sculpted brows were furrowed, and then raised in surprise as she processed your words, “Y/N! I think—”

Across the room, Fred and George were no longer talking to Bagman. Instead, they were talking to each other, and apparently arguing about something. Before you could point it out to Angelina, they were headed your way.

Fred stopped right in front of you, “Hello, Y/N. Care for a chat?”

You glanced to Angelina, who’s wide eyes were glancing frantically back and forth between you and Fred. “Too much sexual tension for there to be no feelings,” she muttered, apparently to herself.

You blushed, hoping Fred hadn’t heard that. He must not have, because he was still looking at you, “Uh, sure.”

Fred gestured for you to follow him as he made his way outside, to where rosebushes had been conjured and filled with tiny, living fairies, who glowed in the chilly nighttime air. A statue of Father Christmas and his reindeer were elegantly placed in the middle of the makeshift enclosure.

Fred stopped and faced you. “I saw you kiss George.”

You frowned, scrunching your nose, “Yeah. So?” You shivered once, not having a coat or a sweater of any kind, and Fred noticed. He took off his own and draped it over your shoulders.

“Thanks,” you muttered. This felt somehow similar to when Louis had tried to ask you to the Ball a few weeks ago.

“So, why did you kiss him?”

You met Fred’s eyes, very confused. “What do you mean? He’s my date, I’m allowed to kiss my date, aren’t I?”

“Well, I’d rather you not.”

Your expression shifted into one of incredulity, “Fred are you actually serious? Did you bring me out here for another lecture on which boys you think want to use me for sex? Because I’m pretty sure George has no interest in—”

He frowned, exasperated, “No! No. I just—Why George? Why is it… always George?” He was staring at you quite intently, and you were again reminded of a different time. Fourth year, broom cupboard, hide and seek.

You took a step back from him, clueless, “What do you mean ‘Why is it always George?’ Like I said, George is my date.” You felt like there was something you should be figuring out right about now. This was too weird.

“But, you didn’t want to kiss him…” he said slowly.

You rolled your eyes, “Well, it’s not like he forced me.”

Fred frowned, clearly this is not what he had wanted you to say, “No, I mean, you didn’t really want to kiss him.”

You paused, crossing your arms, “No. I guess I didn’t really want to kiss him.”

“But you did anyway… because he was your date.”

“Yes. Because he was my date.” You avoided mentioning the other, more embarrassing reasons for the kiss.

“But why?” he asked, still staring at you very intently, still dressed very nicely.

You were silent for a moment, wondering where he was headed with this, “Why what?”

Fred frowned, also in thought, “Why didn’t you want to kiss him?”

You rolled your eyes, “Because I don’t like him like that, you dolt. We’re just friends.”

“It always seemed as though you like George. I mean, what’s not to like? I know he’s not as good looking as I am, but still.” Fred seemed to think this comment was pretty funny, because he smirked to himself.

You pressed your face into your hands and groaned.

“So why?” he repeated. You shot him a scathing look. “Why don’t you like him like that, I mean,” he corrected.

Your eyes lingered on his brown ones. He seemed earnest, there was no hint that he was about to make fun of you. “I… I don’t see how that’s any of your business.”

He scoffed, “I think it’s entirely my business.”

You turned toward him again, cheeks hot, “And why would you think that, you entitled prick?”

His eyes met yours, and then he glanced up. The sky was inky and filled with scatterings of stars and a bright full moon, just like the trick ceiling inside the Great Hall. Combined with the elegant enclosure, it would have been dreadfully romantic—if you were with anyone else.  

When Fred’s gaze found yours again, there was something softer to it: he was vulnerable, “You know why, Y/N.”

Your stomach dropped and your eyes fell to the grass. There was no way he knew. You were careful, you were—

“Y/N,” he repeated.

“I—I’m afraid you’re going to have to explain yourself,” you settled in, ready to defend yourself.

“Because I’m in love with you,” your gaze shot up at this, eyes wide, “and I think I deserve to know who my competition is.” Fred’s eyebrows were furrowed and his expression was honest. He was steeled, prepared to take this blow, prepared to know, finally, that you didn’t love him back.

You turned from him, despite every cell in your body telling you to do the opposite. You were on fire. “But…” you sputtered, “you hate me!”

He laughed, “I will admit that I acted to intentionally make my feelings for you less obvious.” He paused, “But honestly, woman, you didn’t know?”

You spun towards him again, now several feet away, in utter disbelief at how idiotic the pair of you had been acting: being mean to each other to throw the other off your scent. “Of course I didn’t know!”

Fred took in your distressed expression and took a few strides towards you, grabbing your forearms in an attempt to calm you. His hands were warm, you could feel the body heat radiating off of him. It was cold outside, damnit. And he must have been wearing some sort of potion for cologne, because your head was light with this sudden close proximity.

You slammed your palms against his chest in a weak attempt to display your anger, failing when you noticed his muscles tense under your fingers. You let Fred pull you into a hug. You were enveloped in him for the first time in a long time, and you couldn’t help but notice how well you fit together.

After a few moments, you heard his voice, “So, who is it?” His voice was in your ear as George’s had been during your slow dance, but with Fred’s words, a shiver went down your spine.

You tilted your head, chin resting on his chest as he looked down at you. His dark eyes were still hardened in preparation of your confession. And though you felt bad for him in the moment, thinking that you were about to tell him about your feelings for someone else, you couldn’t help but smile and tuck your face back into his chest. Fred loved you back. You could hear his heart beating at a speed you were positive was much quicker than it should be.

“Who is it, love? I promise, you won’t hurt my feelings, if that’s what you’re worried about. We can stay friends, I won’t be upset.” You could tell he was trying to be gentle. He didn’t want to hurt you while you told him who you loved instead.

You groaned, and spoke into his shirt, “It’s you, you absolute tosser.”

There was a long pause. Then:

“What was that? Couldn’t quite hear you, darling.” You could hear the overjoyed smile in his voice, and you knew, he had most definitely heard you. He was being cheeky, already.

You pulled your face back from him again, and met his eyes. You opened your mouth to speak, but before you got any words out, he was leaning down and kissing you.

And it was a little awkward at first, with both of you being so excited, you fumbled for a bit. But after a moment or two, your noses stopped bumping and you wound your hands in his hair and kissed him back as passionately as you could. His arms pulled tighter around you, and one hand reached down to squeeze your butt.

You pulled away, swatting at him. “Hey!” But, both of you were breathless and smiling and you leaned in again. The night was cold but you might have been in a sauna for all you knew. Your blood was racing through your veins. You’d wanted this for years.

Kissing Fred was nothing like your kiss with George had been. Fred’s lips on yours made all of the disgustingly cheesy things you read about in romance novels happen: your heart was racing, your head was light, your stomach was filled with butterflies.

When you finally pulled away, both you and Fred were gasping for breath, the cold, winter air drawing into your lungs again and again.

You cleared your throat, “I said…” you gave Fred a pointed look, “It’s you, you absolute tosser.”

He laughed under his breath, “Yeah, I gathered, love.” He moved in to peck your lips again.

As you walked back to the Great Hall, his arm around your shoulders, you grinned at him, “So, me and my fantastically proportioned figure and extraordinary facial features, huh?”

Fred rolled his eyes.

----

A/N 2: I hope you liked it! Let me know what you think! I love reading your comments 🥺💕⚡️🧡 

[cirrius-akiyo]

50* + buddie sorry but if you want to write both that is okay with me hehe

Read in AO3

@buckleysjareau , I couldn't help myself but to do both 49 and 50 from the Fluff/Angst Prompts List

I hope you'll enjoy this as much as I enjoy writing it.

Thank you for the prompts. 🤗🤩

The moment Eddie agreed to throw himself into the underground fighting scene, he never thought in a million years he would get addicted to the adrenaline roaring through his vein with every punch that followed. Eddie thought he would be able to quit anytime he wanted to, because he was still in control, he needed to be in control. He woke up every morning convincing himself that those days would be his last in the scene, that he would stop when he could, that he would not let himself astray more than it was, but every triumph and money stacks he received at the end of his wins made it harder and harder to quit.

Of course, things got out of hand because the next thing he knew, his opponent was not breathing and Eddie knew without intervention, the man was as good as dead. Calling for an ambulance to the scene was a risky move, but deep inside he knew he is a firefighter first, and so he braced himself for the consequences as he dialed the 9-1-1. Consequences that include exposing himself open in front of Bobby, confronting the ghost of his stewed anger towards Shannon and towards himself. Consequences that had forced him to talk with Frank, leaving out all of his skeletons and miles long disappointments for a stranger to see.

Now, the consequences of his bad decision had come back to taunt him yet again, forcing him to wait once more at the wrong side of the hospital room.

Moving Christopher’s weight from one side to the other, Eddie wipes away the stray tear stains painted on his son’s face who has his head cradled at the crook of Eddie’s shoulder, still sobbing silently. The hushed sobs compel Eddie to stifle his own as he inspects the gauze on Chris’ left elbow, examining his own aching knuckles.

Eddie’s focus shifted from their minor injuries as he looks up at the direction the clicking sound of booted footsteps belongs to none other than Sergeant Athena Grant, who is walking towards them with urgency and purpose.

“How is he doing?” Athena queries as she takes a sit beside Eddie, her back stiffs against the hard chair, staying alert with any impending news.

Eddie purses his lips and spats bitterly in a hushed whisper, “Are you asking about Chris or Buck?” Because right now, both of them are far from being okay by Eddie’s definition. Hell, he himself is far from okay at the moment, so excuse him for struggling to contain his emotion.

But credit to Athena, she does not sway a bit with his little outburst and simply clarifies, “both.”

“Sorry.” Eddie exhales roughly, wiping his face with his free hand.

Athena smiles empathetically. “Don’t be. We are all strung out with the news. I have talked with Maddie and Bobby. She will be here soon. The rest of the team will come once their shift is over.”

Eddie nods, grateful for her help because the thought of calling Maddie or the team totally skipped his mind with his sole focus fixed on his family and their safety. “Chris got some bruise on his elbow when he skinned himself falling down. Other than that, he’s quite shaken up. Buck on the other hand,” Eddie paused, pushing the queasy feeling down before continues, “he was barely responsive when they brought him in. The doctor said something about possible concussion and broken ribs.” Eddie breaks his eye contact with Athena, not wanting her to see his brimming tears.

“How about you, Eddie?”

“What about me?” Eddie retorts defensively, pulling Christopher tighter into his embrace, as if he is ready to pick up the boy and run away, away from this mess and nightmare.

“As far as I’m concern, you’re a victim too in this attack. So, tell me, how are you doing?” She repeats herself, demanding for a no-bullshit answer.

“I’m fine. Buck took the brunt of it.” That is definitely a ‘bullshit’ answer.

Athena arches an eyebrow, giving Eddie a skeptical look but does not pries further on the subject.

Instead, she proceeds with her business with, “Do you mind if I ask you a few questions?”

There it is, the million-dollar question Eddie has been dreading the moment he saw Athena walked down the corridor. Because to answer her questions, Eddie needs to relive the hellish moment again, visiting his past mistake and he is not sure if he has the gut to do it.

“Can we please do this after Tia Pepa picks up Christopher?” Eddie tries to compromise, ignoring how broken his voice sounds, because he really doesn’t want to subject Chris through the torment again.

Athena nods in understanding. “Sure. I’ll wait right here with you, or do you want to be alone?” She asks as she changes her posture, preparing to leave if Eddie wanted her to.

“No, stay please. I don’t want to be alone.” Eddie pleads, not sure what comes over him as the words leave his mouth.

“Sure, honey.” Athena relaxes in her seat, but her keeping her guarding stance.  

 

///

 

“Are you ready, Eddie?” Athena starts, pulling out her notepad and pen.

Eddie nods, not trusting his words now because he would never be ready. All his life, he never would imagine himself being a victim, having caring countless victims in his few years of service, but today’s incident has changed the narrative.

“Do you recognize who hurt you? Hurt Chris and Buck?”

“Yeah. He uh… I uh… fought him once… during the street fighting, and uh, he lost quite a big sum that day.” Eddie grits his teeth, nausea building up behind his throat as he remembered the thrills he felt when he received the winning stacks, the elated face of Christopher when he bought him the latest Lego set using the bloody money. 

“Do you have a name?” Athena proceeds stoically, not a bit fazed by Eddie’s dirty little secret.

“Jake…um, Jake Woodson? I think so, yeah.”

“How about you tell me what went down from the beginning.”

Eddie shuts his eyes, trying to recall the mirage of the daunting memories. He could feel his palm getting sweaty under the visible stress. He really doesn’t want to do this, but the son of a bitch needs to pay for hurting his family, and so Eddie perseveres.

“We were at the park. The one near the firehouse.”

*

“It’s getting dark. You think it’s time to go home yet?” Buck asked as he shoved his hands into the pocket of his brown jacket.

“Yeah. I think we burn enough of Chris’ energy for today. I’m tucking him tonight.” Eddie smiled cheekily at the prospect of Chris easily falling asleep.

Buck pouted. “You always tucked him in when he already burned out. It’s not fair,” the man half grumbled.

Eddie chuckled heartily, grabbing Buck’s elbow as they strutted towards Chris who was still immersed feeding the ducks. “But you love it.”

“I do, but we are stopping by the McDonald’s afterwards.” Buck flashed him an evil grin.

“No, we aren’t.” Eddie chastised.

“Hey Chris! How does a McFlurry sounds?” The shouts caught Chris’s attention right away and he beamed at the promise of dessert.

“You vile, vile man.”

“You love me.”

“I know I do.”

*

“We were walking back to our truck when he approached.” Eddie continues.

“Jake Woodson?”

Eddie grimaced at the name, but nods in confirmation.

“So, what happened then?” Athena prods as she tries to paint a clearer picture of the incident.

“We were completely blindsided. I was about to help Chris into his seat when suddenly this man shoved me to the ground, bringing Chris down with me. That’s how Chris…” Eddie gestures to his left elbow, hoping Athena would comprehend.

*

“Hey! Get away from my family!” Buck growled before pushing the man away from Eddie and Chris who were still stunned on the ground.

The man, who Eddie swears got bigger from the last time Eddie saw him, sneered at Buck and before Eddie could warned his husband, Jake grabbed Buck’s head and smashed it hard to the side of their truck, painting the metal red.

Eddie screamed as Buck collapsed in a heap, his face scrunched in a mixture of daze and pain as blood sluggishly trickled down his temple.

*

Eddie lets out a harsh sigh, looking down at the tear drops staining his jeans.

“Do you want to take a break?” Athena places her hand on the sobbing man’s shoulder.

Eddie shakes his head. He wants to get this done and over with.

“I want to help Buck, but Christopher was crying behind me. I couldn’t simply leave him alone. What if Jake attacked him?” Eddie sheds angrily at the tears that doesn’t seem to be stopping.

The torn feelings he had felt at that time was agonizing.

“So, I…I pushed Chris to hide behind the truck…oh God! I should help Buck faster! I should...I should…,” Eddie breaths bleakly at the thought as he shuts his eyes close, trying to replay the moment where he could do better.

Athena immediately kneels in front of Eddie, trying to calm down the man who is now borderline hyperventilating. “Eddie, Eddie! Listen to me. Listen. What you did was right. Buck would want you to put Christopher’s safety first.”

Eddie inhales, feeling his breaths stutter in his chest.

“You have to breath. Calm down now, Eddie. What you’ve been through is traumatic, but you have to breath.”

Eddie tries his darndest best to hold himself together.

“That’s right. Keep breathing, Eddie.”

“Okay. Okay.” Eddie chokes back the sobs.

“Are you good to continue?” Athena eyes him.

Eddie nods feebly as he levels down his breathing pace.

“When I got to them, Jake was kicking Buck in the chest.” Eddie swallows hard, recalling how Buck tried to cover his head and chest in a losing fight. “I threw some punches but he won’t relent. Keep snarking about how I should lose everything too like he did.”

“Do you know what that means?” Athena asks further as she jots down Eddie’s statements.

Eddie shrugged, completely clueless. “I don’t know. I just know that I won big that day. I haven’t fight him again afterwards.” He hangs his head low as shame and guilt slithers up his spine.

Eddie is pulled out of his self-loathing when he heard a female doctor asks, “family of Evan Buckley-Diaz?”

Both of them stand up in record time, meeting the doctor halfway who is smiling softly, but Eddie does not dare to let his heart hope, not until he could see Buck is alive and well for himself. Because the last time Eddie saw Buck, the love of his life was half-conscious with blood covering most of his face.

“I’m his husband. Is he okay?” In any other circumstances, Eddie is always proud to tell anybody who is asking that Buck is in fact his husband, but never like this. Not in this sterile hospital corridor surrounded by death and diseases.

“Your husband is going to be just fine.” She starts off with assuring note before continues, “he sustained a nasty concussion and two broken ribs, but he is very lucky there is no internal bleeding, neither in the head nor chest, just some major bruising. Head wound tends to bleed a lot, a fact that I’m sure both of you are familiar with.”

“Can I see him?” His voice timid. The smile that never leaves the young doctor’s face did little to nothing in comforting his racing heart.

“Of course, but he is asleep now. He will be disoriented and most likely in pain when he wakes up later, but other than that, he should recover just fine with plenty of rest.” The doctor finishes off cheerily.

Eddie lets out a breath he didn’t realize he’s holding. Buck is fine. He is fine. Buck is alive. The mantra resonates throughout his body, vibrating at a wild pace throughout each cell.

But he is pulled out of his stupor when Athena pats his back. “I knew his thick skull would come in handy sometimes.” She chuckles wetly, and Eddie swears he saw the Great Athena Grant sheds a tear.

 

///

 

It was almost midnight when Buck stirs groggily, whining unhappily at the assault of pain his body is experiencing.

Eddie approaches his husband almost immediately, calming the struggling man in a hush manner. “Easy Buck.”

At the mention of his name, Buck looks up hazily towards the caramel-brown eyes that hold his world. “Y‘kay? C’ris?” He slurred, flinching as he tries to swallow.

Eddie lets out a wet laugh at Buck’s question as he fetches the water and guiding his husband for small sips.

“We are both okay. Some bruises, but you’re the one who manages to land on this beautifully crafted hospital bed.” Buck doesn’t seem to miss the broken notes in the man’s jesting laugh, but he chooses to let it slides as he turns his head around the room, noting the absence of their son.

Seeing the confusion on Buck’s face as he starts to thrash around, Eddie know exactly who is Buck looking for. “Chris is at Abuela’s. He’s fine.” Eddie emphasis on the word ‘fine’, just so Buck would calm down in his bed.

Yet Buck gives him an unimpressed look, sensing some omission of facts through Eddie’s cracked voice.

Eddie sighs dejectedly. All the time they have spent together, obviously Buck could easily read through his lies even in his groggy state.

“Just some bruises when he fell, I promise.” Eddie confessed. “But you on the other hand…” Eddie tries to find the right word that won’t hurt so much, but suddenly his eyes starts to dampen again.

This time, in the private company of his lover and away from judging eyes, Eddie couldn’t help himself but to cry.

“I almost lost you so many times before, but nothing compares of almost losing you because of my own stupid mistake. I am so sorry, Buck. I swear I never thought it would come down to this.”

“Eddie, I’ll do it all over again just so you and Chris will be safe.” Buck’s voice is definitely stronger and Eddie wonders where does Buck pulls the strength from, because right now Eddie is feeling weak on his knees himself and if he had not been sitting, he would definitely collapse. As his tears fall free, Buck seems to be more alert than before and Eddie couldn’t help but to feel ashamed his outburst has ripped Buck from his well-deserving rest.

“Do you think I’m broken? Because you’re the one on the hospital bed, but here I am struggling to contain myself when I should be the strong one.” Eddie hangs his head low as more broken sobs escapes him.

“Eddie, look at me.” Buck cups Eddie’s chin with his right hand, wary of the IV lines as he pulls his lover’s face towards him. “Eddie, nothing is wrong with you. Struggling is what we do best, and people like you and me struggle because we care, we’re not giving up and we’re trying to stay afloat. Am I wrong?”

Eddie tries to look away, but Buck's face and arched eyebrow say that he demands a response. 

“No, you’re not. You’re right.” Eddie lets out a small smile at Buck’s words of affirmation.

“Heck yeah, I’m right. I choose to marry you and I’ve chosen to stay with you throughout your struggles.” Buck plops down on the pillow. “But for now, I’m struggling to stay awake. Get in here with me?” Buck scoots over and pulls his blanket to make space for his husband, careful of the lines  and wires hanging around him.

“I’m sure it will be a tight squeeze.” Eddie shakes his head affectionately at Buck’s proposal, not that he would fight it much if Buck insists.  

“Please. I sleep easier with you close to me.” And there is the puppy eyes attack and Eddie finally relents as he climbs onto the bed gingerly, trying not to jostle Buck’s ribs much.

“Athena was here. She said your thick skull is what saved you.” Eddie whispers against Buck’s shoulder, basking in the warmth that seeps through the thin hospital gowns.

Buck only smiles at the remarks, already half asleep.

Eddie knows he should update their family soon, but that is for future him to handle, because right now, he just wants this moment to be just for the two of them.

“I love you and all your struggles too.” One last confession before both of them paddles through their dreamland.

[cait-with-luv]

J.JK Soul Ink - Chapter 12

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¬ Walk The Line - Halsey

For hours you and Jimin sat in the living room catching up on the years you had missed with each other.  Jimin had told you that an old woman had took him when she noticed him wandering the streets with silent tears streaming down his face. She had held him in her arms reassuring he was safe with her and she will keep him safe until he was able to care for himself. He still visits her when he has the time.

There was a lot of tears and a lot of laughter. But your hearts were heavy as you realised you both had lost the chance to grow up together and that you had lost your parents. You were each others only blood family and you intended of protecting each other.

"So what was life like for you?" Jimin asked as your laughter settled. The smile fell of your face and Jimin knew it wasn't easy. The atmosphere filled with tension. You looked down nervously and shrugged playing with your fingers.

"The first what? 5 years I think, Beom-Seok would just ignore me, give me the cold shoulder, I was a kid I didn't know what I had done. At first I thought it was because he was mourning Mom but then it progressively got worse as I got older and I just knew he had a problem with me. By the time I was 15 I was arguing back, it'd earn me a hit and the same saying, 'don't talk back to your superior bitch'. Made me realize how very sexist he was. Thought women were and should be maids, stay at home and look after kids and follow orders of men. The typical old fashioned kinda dickhead." You explained still not looking up.

You feel Jimin place a hand on your shoulder and you look up and he gives you a small smile and you continue,

"As soon as I turned 18 that was it, abuse got worse, the control got worse, choosing the way my life should be to satisfy him like who I should marry, when I should have kids, making sure it was a boy once I was pregnant. I always turned it into an argument, rebelling A LOT some things to piss him off, some to just feel some control over my own life. I felt like a marionette and he was the marionettist. I was slowly losing my mind. Irene was the only thing keeping me grounded."

You let out a laugh as you remember how you met Irene.

"I met Irene when were 19, I'll never forget it, that's a story for another day."  You chuckle.

"I know it's been 3 days since I met you all b-but I feel like meeting you all kind of saved my life and I don't know how to thank you for that. I-I'm so scared of him Jimin" You say nervously.

Jimin pulls you into him and hugs you tightly and shakes his head.

"You don't have to thank us Butterfly. We were planning on taking Beom-Seok out for ages, we would of met eventually. The rest may not show much but they about you a lot. You're bangtan now, whether you want to stay with us after everything calms down or not. We're always gonna have your back. Besides you're stuck with me for the rest of your life, I have a lot of years of big brother responsibility to catch up on." He teases.

"Oh yeah? And what might the big brother responsibility be?" You say raising an eyebrow and crossing your arms and he chuckles ruffling your hair making you whine in protest.

"Being annoying as possible. Protecting you from dickheads, making sure you never get laid again." Jimin smirks. You gasp and shove his shoulder making him laugh out and throw his head back almost falling off his seat making you burst out laughing.

The laughter settles and he places both of his hands on your head, leaning it down and pressing a kiss to your head making you smile. You look back and he's smiling back at you.

"I love you Butterfly, don't ever forget that okay?" He says softly. You nod and hug him tightly.

"I love you too Mochi."

You both sit in silence until you break as realization sinks in. Your eyes widen and you struggle to get out of your brothers hold.

"Wha-"

"Jungkook! Oh my god he confessed that he cared for me, I need to talk to him!" You say quickly cutting Jimin off, trying to get off the couch but Jimin stops you shaking his head.

"No not yet. I know that kid. He needs to cool of for a while. And he's not great with confrontation. He'll lose his shit as soon as he sees you. He'll be in the gym anyway he ignores everyone that goes in. I have to speak to him too kid." Jimin says. You nod slowly and sit back down reluctantly before glaring at him realizing what he had called you.

"I'm not a kid, I'm a year younger than you." You saying glaring at him. He shakes his head and smirks,

"Don't care still a kid to me."

"Jimin, does Jungkook mean what he meant or was it a spur of a moment kind of thing?" You ask beginning to feel insecure. Jimin purses his lips and shrugs. You pout and nod sadly making Jimin sigh and run a hand through his hair.

"The thing with Jungkook is, he has a lot and I mean a lot of penned up anger so he basically has anger issues and is a ticking time bomb. It makes him unpredictable and impulsive. He'll spew a shit ton of words and the leave you clueless as to if he actually meant them or not but the thing is after he calms down and goes over what he has said, he doesn't even know himself if he meant it or not which knocks him back into a temper tantrum out of frustration which is why I told you to leave him so he can gather his own thoughts and try and realize if he meant them or not. You kind of just learn not to take anything to heart and laugh it off. Jungkook may be 23 but the guy is still a kid in some ways. His childhood was took away from him, he's making up for it in some ways. He was so young when he lost his family. He's had it worse than us all. I can't tell you his story, it's not my place to but he's really sensitive to it. If tells anyone about it, he trusts you with his whole heart that's how we know we can trust a certain person. He's like a little fake or no detector" Jimin explains.

Your heart feels heavy hearing how much turmoil Jungkook has within himself, it makes you slightly guilty that you sometimes pushed him to flip. You bite your lip and nod guiltily.

"He's never been angry at you, you know? Irritated yeah but never angry. You'll know when that kid is angry. It's mostly bantering for him with you. May not feel like it because he takes it too far sometimes but he's really trying. He panics with his emotions, he never knows if he has the right emotion at the right time, like if someone is hurt and he's sad, he wouldn't think that was normal. He has his reasons and we're trying to teach him feeling any emotion is normal. I can assure you though he feels something for you. Whether that be an urge to protect you or he genuinely thinks of you as someone he sees himself with, I don't know. He probably doesn't even know." Jimin says with a small smile. You smile slightly feeling like some weight has been took of your shoulders.

"I guess that's why we can clash. I'm always angry and I can take things too far." You laugh humorlessly.

"Do you care for him?" Jimin blurts out taking you back and blink rapidly.

"What?" You ask in confusion.

"Jungkook? Do you care for him?" Jimin elaborates.

You sigh and shrug.

"I don't know Chim. I look at him and sometimes I'm like, god, I could just strangle the fucker." You laugh shaking your head making Jimin snicker and then you turn back serious.

"But then sometimes I look at him and my heart flutters and I feel warm and really nervous and all I can think is, god I just want to kiss him. Then I remember I've known him for 3 days. I can't like him that fast, there's no way. This guy has tried nothing but to piss me off, I should hate him. B-But I can't." You explain lying your head on Jimin's lap and he begins to play with your hair.

"Ever heard of fate? Love at first sight? You love that brat don't you?" Jimin says smiling.

"I've never believed in love at first sight but I might start having to b-because I think I might love him." You say mostly to yourself but Jimin hears and smiles.

Your conversation ended and you sat in silence just enjoying each others presence, eventually both falling asleep. But little did you both know...

The focus of the conversation was stood right outside the door listening to every word.

He slides down the wall, his hands covering his face, knees to check and he whispers to himself finally letting his denial go,

I love her.

------------

A week.

A whole week Jeon Jungkook had been avoiding you. At first you thought it was him gathering his thoughts just like your brother had told you but now you were beginning to doubt that. In fact you knew he was just avoiding you on purpose, you had noticed he had very quickly solved things with Jimin and your anger was slowly boiling. Each time he'd see you, he'd walk the opposite way, if you called out his name, he'd pretend he didn't hear you.

You had done nothing wrong that day for him to avoid you this long. Sure may feel embarrassed about the sudden words he spoke but leaving the situation to build worse ones was a stupid idea. You needed to talk to him and solve things. Even if it means locking in him a room.

And that's exactly what you were going to do. You were done being ignored and left questioning yourself. The boys had noticed the peace in the house and the tension between you both. They had refused to get involved in fear they'd lose their lives to you or the maknae. Maybe even both of you. And as weird as it sounds, you were kinda missing your bickering with Jungkook.

It was late and you lay in bed unable to sleep. You sit up and check your phone,

3:26 am

You groan and fall back down. You lie silently staring up at the ceiling until you remember Jimin mentioning a gym that was downstairs. You sit up and put on some shoes, grabbing your water bottle, before silently walking out your room hoping you don't wake anyone.

Once you found the gym you look around in awe. It was like any normal gym except there was a target practice in the corner. You find a punching bag and some hand wraps lying next to it untidily. You pick them up and wrap your hands just like your coach in kickboxing hand taught you. Once they felt tight enough you throw a practice punch at the bag before progressively making them quicker then more effort.

You were bouncing on your feet and then you began to kick it making sure to use all your strength. You were so concentrated you didn't notice you had company until you span to do a reverse roundhouse kick. You gasp and hold a hand to your hand to your heart.

"Jungkook." You say panting. He stares for a minute before trying to silently walk out but you stop him. You weren't letting him get away.

"Jeon Jungkook you better turn your ass back around and talk to me because next time I have to try talk to you, I'm not gonna be as nice." You say firmly and he freezes before slowly turning back to you and not looking up.

"We need to talk." You say taking a sip from you water wiping some sweat from your face. He nods and mumbles,

"I know..."

You toss your water aside and cross your arms staring at him waiting to talk but he doesn't say anything so you sigh.

"I'll start then shall I?" You say and Jungkook shakes his head rapidly.

"N-Not here, come with me to one of our rooms? There's cameras in here and I don't trust my hyungs."  

You nod and pull the hand wraps off and grab your water before following him back upstairs and he walks into your room making you realize he wanted to talk as private as possible since the boys rarely come in your room. You shut your door silently and then turn to Jungkook who sat on the edge of your bed. You take him and your cheeks redden slightly as you finally realize he's sat with just shorts and sneakers on. No shirt. You try your best not to check him out but Jungkook notices and smirks.

"Take a picture it'll last longer."

You glare at him and he clears his throat and looks down.

"I didn't mean to upset you by avoiding you. I-I was just, I didn't know how to approach you and mainly because I'm shit with facing stuff like this head on." He says nervously and you nod.

"I understand I just wished you actually spoke to me. I thought I'd done something wrong." You sigh and he nods.

"I don't handle emotions well if you didn't notice. I-I don't know what to do half the time. I wanted to talk I did but I thought I was doing what was best for us. It pisses me off so much that I don't realize until last minute that I'm wrong." Jungkook says growing frustrated and you try to calm him down not wanting him to wake up the other and break something.

"It's okay, we're talking now right?" You say softly taking a seat next to him.

He nods gulping and looks down to his hands.

"W-when Jimin hyung and I was arguing last week I could feel my anger rising and I just blurted it out. I didn't know I said what I said until Jin hyung called me out on it, that's when I realized what I had said. I didn't  even know if what I had said was true. I always force myself into denial for ages because I'm stubborn and don't know if what I feel is true or a spur of the moment thing." Jungkook says.

"I feel this kind of love hate towards you, some days I just wanna piss you off and then some days I just want to pin you against the wall and kiss you." He says biting his lip ring. Your breath hitches and you look down cheeks going rosy.

"I get conflicted and I end up pissing us both off and nearly kissing you. I'm surprised you haven't punched me yet from my mood swings." Jungkook laughs dryly.

"I-I heard you and Jimin hyung talking last week about me. Not intentionally, I was getting myself some water and I heard the two of you. It made me finally realize," Jungkook says nervously turning to you. He looks into your eyes and your chest tightens.

"I do care for you. So much. I think that's why it pisses me off because I've never felt like this towards someone before. Y/N I-I think I love you." He says nervously his doe eyes staring at you. Despite exterior being tough from the tattoos and piercings you could tell is interior he was just this big ball of fluff who's innocence was ripped away from him to young.

You both sat in silence for a minute and Jungkook begins to get nervous thinking he had took her love for him the wrong way. He goes to speak but his eyes widen when he feels your soft lips on his. His heart flutters and lets out a sigh of relief against your lips. His lip ring cold against your bottom lip. His eyes flutter shut and he pulls you onto his lap, legs wrapping around his small waist, arms wrapped around the back of his neck tugging his hair lightly making him groan.

His hands rest on your hips and he squeezes them making you gasp. He takes this opportunity and slips his tongue into your mouth and you both fight for dominance. You got a little surprised when he let you win you expected him to win. He slides his hands up your body making you shiver as he made contact with your bare skin. His hands then begins to slip under your crop top and you arch your back moaning at the feeling of his calloused hands. His grip tightens as he feels you push your chest against his.

His hands go back to the edge of your crop top and he tugs it, wanting you he wanted it off. He pulls it up and you lift your arms up so he can pull it off. He throws it to the floor and stares at you in awe. His begins to kiss down your neck, he stops at the base of your neck and begins to nip and suck on the sensitive skin making you let out a small wince from the pain. He stops when he satisfied and continues to kiss down to your collarbone making you gasp and tighten your grip on his hair making him stop and let out a whine. Okay so he likes his being pulled you thought to yourself.

He starts to sniffle and then you feel your skin of you shoulder getting wet. Your eyes widen as you realized he was crying. You grab the sides of his face and your heart melts at the sight of his red nose and eyes. You caress his cheek and he leans into your touch still sniffling.

"Jungkookie..." You coo placing your forehead against his and he sighs in content, his arms wrapping around you, wanting to hold you close.

"I-I'm sorry, I'm just overwhelmed. I-I haven't felt this loved in a long time and I-I've never really loved anyone before." He stutters. You pout and shake your head.

"Hey it's okay, don't apologize, I understand you baby." You say softly. His eyes lighten at the sound of the nickname you had called him.

"You called me baby." He says smiling making you giggle and nod. You felt honored that he was showing you this side to him.

"I've not had an easy life and I still have demons that haunt me to this day and I hope you accept me for that." He says quietly and you press a kiss to his forehead.

"We all have our demons Kook, it's okay."

"I-I want you to know me better if we're gonna be together Y/N. I want your trust." He says. You give him a small smile and shake your head,

"You already have it."

He smiles and nods but continues and the smiles fade off your faces when the conversation became serious.

"I was only 5 when I lost my parents. I didn't have an family to go to, I-I got chucked into an orphanage and then took in by my estranged uncle a year later when he found out my mother and father had died. I thought that now I had family to go to I'd be okay but boy was I so wrong. From day one he tried turning me into a stone hearted killer. Feel nothing but anger and pleasure of killing. That's why I'm so shit with emotions I was taught to not feel, to switch them off. It almost worked too." Jungkook says tears welling up in his eyes.

"Beom-Seok had locked us up for ages. He'd beat my father making us all watch. Then he'd turn on my mother, then me. I thought I was gonna die. One day though he had really beaten me up, I couldn't move, it hurt to breathe. I remember my mom holding me and my dad holding us both, they thought I was going to die that night. My mom was crying telling me take small breaths instead of big ones. My dad hand on my head saying everything was going to be okay, that he was going to get me out of there. My mom and dad knew they were going to die. They didn't want the same fate for me. They told me to play dead and once I had the chance run. When the one of the workers came in, I lay so still in my moms arms as she cried. She was pretending to mourn me but I knew she was crying because it would be the last time she'd see me." Jungkook whimpers.

Your eyes begin to tear up hearing his voice strain and break as he reminisced. He tries to avoid eye contact but you hold his face in your hands and mumble,

"You don't have to carry on if it upsets you too much."

He shakes his head and carries on,

"My mum and dad were mumbling they loved me so much and that they hope I stay safe. I remember being ripped out of my moms arms. I felt sick. Once I felt the breeze and cold breathe the fresh air, I elbowed the worker in the stomach and ran as fast as I could a-and you know the rest." He croaks and fresh tears streaming down his face. You sit in silence as you let him calm down. He stares at you and whimpers out,

"Please don't leave me. I've lost to much. No matter how much of a dick I'll be, please don't leave me."

You shake your head biting your lip to stop yourself crying. You pull him into a hug and he lays his head on your chest and kiss the top of his head and rub his back and whisper to him,

"I'm not going anywhere."

[camuslittlesister]

Idols, idols and more idols - thoughts on Ryo (Scandal in the Spotlight)

So, this week’s freebie in L365 was Ryo’s route, which brings me to a close of the S1 except I keep mixing up two of the idols and I’m not sure if I read both, or one of them twice and just forgot the route because I’m not the biggest fan of the title. I mostly pick them all up to see Kyohei bickering with Iori. My first one was Nagito, which is probably the worst possible choice for me since I don’t like the friendly flirty types that much (notable exception being SLBP Hideyoshi, but they’re nowhere near the same thing even in Toshiee’s route. I sort of vaguely tolerate that side of Kurosawa because anyone in Her Love in the Force means Ayumu screentime and I think that’s it). Then I read the two I keep mixing up, and that should say enough about how memorable they were 🙈, then Iori (twice 👀 yes, I still claim I dislike the guy, why you ask?) and Kyohei.

I’m one scene in and already ready to slap the MC. I guess the LI being the songwriter she is replacing meant they turned up the volume on the huge insecurity she keeps displaying in all routes. I am aware the situation she is in is new, and that her inability to write the song is the main driver of the romance, but she is in this situation because she has a dream she is trying to protect, and the way she acts when they ask things of her is something I can’t square with the drive to pursue her ambition at all costs. It’s not like Voltage hasn’t written titles with ambitious MCs around the years this title first came out, or that insecure MCs are always bad (it works for Kings of Paradise, it would have worked in After School Affairs if they went in that direction since a lot of those routes are around how she isn’t as good a teacher as the LI is...).

I just feel that this title would have benefitted from a MC like in ASA or Irresistible Mistakes, even HLITF and a bunch of others who faced challenges head on and just went to do their research and upskilled either by themselves or with the guy (whichever suited the story). I understand the need to diversify the MCs, but plenty of titles suit a more insecure woman than this one. Or, at the very least, make her insecure without being annoyingly clueless like that. It’s a hill I’m willing to die on.

I feel kinda bad for Ryo in his first appearance and can’t bring myself to blame him, so I think it’ll be interesting to see where this goes. I’m also enjoying the nicest Iori has ever been in anyone’s route. If this was the personality he had in his route he’d be husbando material. Too bad 😪 anyway, after the first meeting with Ryo she seems to find the drive I was talking about and the multiple choice options reflect that, so I’m satisfied even though it feels like they swapped MC half way through the chapter...also Ryo is would date in real life material so far, and I’m loving the sudden inspiration for the theme of the song 😏

{Sort of unrelated but “All the carbs give me a big boost of energy” HOW? A holiday in Italy for me is one long food coma and sleepiness that requires a minimum of one espresso every hour not to yawn all the time 😬 2D boys have a biology of their own, I swear...looking at you and your sugar addiction, Onii-san}

{I very much ship these two but also hi Iori here’s a marriage license and here’s a pen, I need you to sign this real quick 👀 no, seriously, who’s this version of Iori? Did they get him out of the Mad Hatter’s hat? This is all I can think about as I read this story...}

In the end, I feel like they once again resolved the drama too quickly after a whole route of sweet nothings happening, but pacing aside it was a good story. I can buy the romance since she likely had a crush on him as Makoto anyway, so the fact Iori is there all the time but not really a rival is believable enough. I really liked how she fell in love through his art as well, it was such a nice touch as a huge music fan myself (even if it’s not that common to see real feelings translated into song, or maybe because of it. It makes Ryo really precious). I think he’s my favourite LI in the title, maybe tied with Kyohei. I might one day buy his S2 onwards (and atm I only own S2 and beyond for HLITF so it’s a huge endorsement).