wakaba727

[liquidstar]

look this site really is awful for ppl with OCD so i just wanna reassure anyone that you are not Tainted Forever for consuming a piece of media with questionable content. the fact that youre able to recognize it speaks to your critical thinking skills, which is good, certain depictions should be critiqued. but you dont need to ruminate on it to the point where you begin to feel guilty for simply witnessing gross or creepy writing choices. you dont have to vindicate yourself to the fictional tumblr discourser inside your head, saying that youre now a bad person bc you watched the wrong anime. your actual response to it still matters of course, but thats that and this is this. just seeing it is neutral, you didnt commit a thought crime. its literally fine.

IF YOU ARE USING THIS POST TO ONLY FURTHER YOUR STUPID PEDANTIC BLACK-AND-WHITE DISCOURSE TO GET A "GOCHA" OVER THE OTHER SIDE YOU ARE THE PROBLEM. DON'T USE OUR DISORDER TO VINDICATE YOUR BEHAVIOR. THOUGHT CRIMES ARENT REAL BUT ACTIONS STILL MATTER. PEOPLE WITH OCD ARE CAPABLE OF THINKING CRITICALLY ABOUT OUR ACTIONS AND RESPONSES, EVEN WITH INTRUSIVE THOUGHTS AND RUMINATIONS. TREATING US AS IF WE CANNOT, ONLY TO FORCE US TO USE YOUR STRINGENT UNNUANCED DISCOURSE OPINIONS ABOUT "PURITY CULTURE" (TRIGGERING TO THOSE WITH OCD) AS THE ONLY REASONABLE GUIDE DOES MORE TO EXACERBATE OUR OBSESSIONS THAN HELP US. YOU ARE THE ISSUE AS WELL. YOU ARE ALSO THE TUMBLR DISCOURSER INSIDE OUR HEADS. DO NOT USE US FOR YOUR DISCOURSE. WE ARE PEOPLE, NOT HYPOTHETICALS TO USE TO EXPLAIN IF YOUR FROZEN INCEST FANFICTION IS OKAY OR NOT. TREATING US AS IF WE CANNOT AUTONOMOUSLY HAVE OUR OWN OPINIONS ON WHEN MEDIA IS TANGIBLY HARMFUL IS ABLEIST. FORCING US TO ABIDE BY YOUR IN-GROUP'S SET OF UNEQUIVOCAL MORALS IS ABLEIST. ACTING AS THOUGH THE ONLY SOLUTION FOR US IS MINDLESS MEDIA CONSUMPTION IN WHICH "EVERY DEPICTION OF XYZ, NO MATTER HOW POORLY DONE OR EXPLOITATIVE, IS ALWAYS OKAY AND IF YOU DISAGREE YOURE ACTUALLY AN EVIL 'ANTI'" IS ABLEIST. THOSE ARE THE SAME BLACK-AND-WHITE MORALS THAT SEND US INTO OBSESSIVE SPIKES, BUT FLIPPED. A SET OF MORALS IN WHICH QUESTIONING THE IMPACT OF A PIECE OF WORK MAKES YOU AN "EVIL CONSERVATIVE PURITAN "ANTI"" DOES NOT HELP MORAL OCD.

YOU ARE THE DAMN TUMBLR DISCOUERSERS MAKING THIS SHIT WORSE FOR US! YOURE THE EXACT SAME BUT WITH FLIPPED BUZZWORDS! YOU'RE MISSING THE WHOLE DAMN POINT!

[eclaire-went-bam]

one thing that i've found interesting about narc abuse truthers, is that they very often claim a narcissist won't ever have the capability or self-awareness to search within themselves and understand something's wrong, because they're so full of themselves or they don't want to do the work

while simultaneously demonising the disorder and making it even harder for people to be comfortable with that sort of introspection?

i think in general, our society is really weird about vanity and confidence. you must be confident and have some ego, but if you give yourself too much a pat on the back, even if you're not being toxic about it, it's seen as strange, almost. maybe too much. especially if you don't frame it in some humble way, like "i think i did this well" or "i tried to look good"

most characters portrayed as disagreeable in media have some sort of ego and aren't humble about it, a lot of protagonists are either humble about it or have lower ego, or use it in charismatic quips.

so when someone hears "narcissistic" in "narcissistic personality disorder," there's automatically that "oh, the vanity" type of disgust— even without hearing about "narc abuse" and the like

that being said, who would want to be associated with that on it's own? that pool shrinks even more when most sites online have a very ableist general opinion on npd, or have multitudes of posts about "narc abuse"

if someone turned around and called a self-proclaimed empath a narcissist, would they like it? no? if someone turned around and called your average joe who isn't chronically online a narcissist, would they like it? no? what makes you think someone with undiagnosed npd would like it, especially when that actively makes them look like a worse person?

maybe if you changed the way you spoke about npd and stopped clogging google with narc abuse falsing, more people with npd would be less averse to looking into the possibility they may have it

even in their own ableist worldview, they are part of the problem they're talking about

oh also generally speaking i do think it should be normalised for egotypicals to not need to be modest about something they're super proud of. i feel like that's a good first step that'll just help everybody anyways.

cut for my personal experience. not that i feel uncomfortable sharing it, i don't, i just feel like i've already said what i wanted to say. some people may find this relatable though idk

npd was really difficult for me to consider because of this. i'd done so many hours of research and even then it took me a long time to be able to say this, not to mention even talking about it openly. although i was exposed to pro "scary" mental health conditions stuff before the ableist stuff online (by some miracle), i still did see the ableist stuff. although i knew it was all wrong, i couldn't help but shake the unconscious conclusion that "if i'm not this, then i'm better." i knew what others thought of npd, so my imaginary way of getting on people's good sides was to simply not have it. thats how i'd gain the admiration of others, even if realistically they'd never know this

even after i came to the conclusion "oh jeez i probably have this" — after multiple years of it impeding every aspect of my life in both positive and horribly negative ways — i couldn't bare the thought that i'd be marked until the day i die. i'll have this, until my brain becomes food for the earth. i have this bug, that no matter what, i can't scrape away. and what made it worse (better?), is that the bug was simultaneously saying "oh hell yeah now i'm more interesting and cooler than anyone else in this room !!"

i'm going to be a bad person forever, when i wanted to be admired by everyone. it doesn't matter what sort of way i act, because this is in my closet, i'm just a bad person (Rhetorical)

and now that i have accepted i might have this, i can't even get help for it after reading all the horror stories !!! so like...what now ? what do the narc abuse truthers reasonably expect me to do .

[ankhisms]

continuing my thoughts on the rise of ableism within leftist online circles but like... maybe this is just me. but if someone approached me and said "hey this thing you did/said was hurtful" my kneejerk reaction is not to get angrily defensive and double down on whatever it is i was doing, i think if someone tells you that youve done something hurtful or bigoted in some way your reaction should always be to take a step back and look at yourself and the situation and to examine things and not only apologize but also try to genuinely change your behavior and listen to the people who your behavior has hurt. and i feel like its a pretty common mentality for people to think that because theyre disabled in one way that means they cant possibly ever be ableist when newsflash! thats not at all true! theres a huge variety of disabled people and disabled experiences in the world, just like every other group of people we are not a monolith and just because you look at something and go "well this isnt harmful to me and doesnt hurtfully reflect my experience and life as a disabled person" doesnt mean that its the same for every other disabled person. idk my brain is a bit scrambled and my words are weird but it saddens me to remember the bad interactions me and other disabled people have had on here within our own communities where weve tried to even politely bring up that something another disabled person said or did was ableist in some way only to have the person double down or get even more violently ableist, and thats not even getting into the instances of people saying "well this isnt ableist, youre just chronically online" like wow. i wonder what group of people might be housebound and are thus spending a lot of time online and have a lot of their social connections online. wow. i wonder who that could be. (its disabled people who are unable to leave their bed or home often). anyway tldr im tapping the sign that says i dont know how to explain to you that you should care about other people

[sanguinewolves]

im just. im really fucking mad. ok i get it ceramics was full. had sculpture as my second choice that was full too. but instead of giving me like a study hall or sth you put me in studio art for the second goddamn time after i took it in 9th grade (and i got a credit for it that time so it means im not getting a credit this year) and not only that but you put me in the class with a teacher who is a known ableist like to the point where other teachers gossip about how she never follows ieps or 504s WHEN I HAVE A FUCKING 504 like i just. and shes racist and shit too but thats not relevant to how bad a decision it was on the schools part bc im white (does make me angry tho but like. shes not targeting me so irrelevant). but like. now i have to spend half the year in a class i hate doing assignments i hate and im not even getting a credit for it but i still have to get good grades because junior year gpa is the most important and i just.

and again unrelated but she (teacher) is such a mean pushy fucking bitch. she has literally ruined one of my art projects (pulled off paper bits i was using to make silhouettes before the paint was dry, they ripped and stuck because they were SOAKED IN WET PAINT and WET PAPER RIPS DUMBASS and tbc she did this after i actively told her 4 times i was deliberately leaving them and I knew what i was doing she reached forward and pulled them off herself) she has pushed me into adding to an art project because it “wasnt balanced” (i deliberately put the whole thing in one half and left the rest of the page blank because i wanted to symbolize the feeling of having to make yourself small to be likeable as an autihd person) and im bad at sticking up for myself and she kept coming to me after class and “chatting” about it for a week until finally i said fine and filled the rest of the page and then a week later she said after hanging it up without my permission and i am quoting this verbatim “you know yours got a lot of compliments from other classes, i feel like i should take some of the credit because i convinced you to fix it and make it more balanced” she has said “oh i like your hand” (i draw + write song lyrics on my hand and arm to help me focus) and when i said thanks she REACHED OUT AND LITERALLY RUBBED MY HAND even when i tried to pull it away (my 504 literally has a thing about no unannounced physical touch) she has given me a low grade on a project because she “felt like it was depressing” like she is not even a good teacher i just. ugh.

[lilac-set]

I saw a post on just-anti-things that i simply have to make a post about, i could put this in the actual comments but i feel like most of the avid followers of that blog are extremely ableist and im scared, so im just gonna make my own post

For some context, i believe in “dont like dont read”, however i am also extremely traumatized, extremely dissociated, and i cant tell the difference between fiction and reality, but i dont make that the problem of people who can, i just distance myself as needed

The post was about antis seeing a sketch of nonspecific characters in a pose as a drawing reference, the two characters are kissing, and they have a significant height gap, and immediately jumping to the conclusion that the shorter one must be a child

This person then went on about how “normal” people dont struggle to acknowledge the normalcy of height gaps between peers, the wide, wide diversity of heights of among people of similar ages, etc, and that being SO normal means that one of them being a child doesnt cross “normal” people’s minds. How it isnt “normal” to see a couple and immediately assume, with no reason to think so, that one of them is a child, and that to see something like that and your first thought be a child having sex, you mustve already been thinking about children having sex, which isnt a “normal” thing to think about

The implication obviously being that “abnormal” = shameful and kind of lowkey accusing those people of being pedophiles

I wanna clarify here that i am pro para (anti contact), and even if that accusation were true i dont think its, like, a problem

But in my limited experience with antis and myself as as pretty shipcourse ambivalent, thats not whats going on, at least most of the time

Most antis, like me, are traumatized and dissociated and we genuinely cant tell the difference between fiction and reality, we cant tell ourselves from someone else, all we know is that our limbic systems are constantly scanning for any sign that our trauma might maybe potentially be happening again, any risk is too much

Yes, if you see an unspecific drawing of a couple with a height gap and your first thought is “child”, because you got triggered, because it reminded you of your trauma with yourself as a child, yeah, you might’ve already been thinking about children having sex, that doesnt mean you were thinking about having sex with children, it usually means you were thinking about your own trauma as a child having sex

Thats why you hear antis say so often, and i have to restrain myself so hard from echoing this sentiment, because emotionally it feels true even though logically i know it isnt, “youre depicting MY trauma”, and proshippers take that to mean the anti thinks they own the sole rights to that type of trauma, but in my experience it isnt that we see something we recognize as similar and think we “own” it, but that our brain tells us it is literally our personal trauma, not something which resembles it, but the literal iteration of it experienced by us ourselves. Thats what a flashback is. Im not saying flashbacks and other trauma responses are grounds to harass people, harassment is bad, i just think proshippers should try not to be ableist maybe? Being a trauma survivor yourself doesnt excuse you from being ableist to other survivors

[voxxphantasma]

ARE PEOPLE REALLY STILL SAYING GALAHAD WOULD CALL THEM SLURS? IN THE MAIN TAGS? die 💖

[1863-project]

I've been thinking a bit about Submas and potential Ableism, recently.

I know it is wrong to have them be Actual animals/pokemon, because its kinda insulting. like just, 'this person's not a Real Human' is such a terrible thing to say. (and a unfortunate coping mechanism that I used to have. "Of course people are mean to me. I don't count as a human. I'm not exactly sure why not ,but Clearly there is some sort of Rule/Classification out there that dictates I am Below Human. Everyone else can see that, and thats just what Is. " I'm just sorta. throwing that out there as a potential example for why that trope can be so harmful and vicious. )

IDK. It took me awhile to realize 'oh. Its not Me, Those people just are bad'. I can't say it helped to have people who thought like me/had feelings similar to me, tended to be aliens and stuff. 'oh ha ha look at the silly alien who has rules about how they eat their meals', when it was 'oh, thats how I eat my meals?...why is that so funny?

This is important, and I think a lot of people don't realize how harmful these things can be to others.

I was bullied from...pretty much kindergarten until I graduated high school, and seeing characters who were like me more or less being treated as subhuman didn't help my self-esteem. I ultimately ended up in a friendship in college that became emotionally abusive and it took me two years to get myself out of it because I didn't think I could or should and the person managed to make me feel even worse about myself.

Seeing people similar to yourself being depicted as non-human, or being joked about/seen as "acceptable targets," can massively impact self-esteem. There's many reasons why the average age of death for autistic people at one point not too far in the past was only 36 years old, and this was actually one of them. Between infanticide from parents who were ashamed of a disabled child or couldn't care for them, bullying and suicide, and struggling in the world without supports and accommodations, a lot of us didn't live very long and still don't. I'm only three years away from that 36 and I think about it a lot, and how lucky I was to have supportive parents. Many people like me aren't lucky. Living in a society that actively rejects you takes a massive toll on your self-esteem and health.

Regarding Submas, there's a big difference between doing Pokemon Mystery Dungeon stuff (the whole franchise revolves around humans turned into Pokemon) or giving them fursonas, etc. and actually writing things where they were never human, because the latter plays right into the ableist trope of "autistic people aren't actually human/are changelings/etc." It's a thing a lot of people aren't aware of because it isn't talked about much outside of autistic advocacy circles - like most disparaged groups of people, it can be difficult to get people to take us seriously outside of our own advocacy bubbles. I've spoken at a conference regarding libraries and autism twice (in 2018 and 2019); both times it was fascinating to see the response from the non-autistic people in attendance. They genuinely didn't know so many of the things that autistic people have known and talked about for years - we're just not heard a lot of the time, although I've noticed it's getting better than it was ten years ago when I was starting out as an advocate. Progress is there, it's just been slower.

Basically, you're not hurting anyone if you're playing around with Pokemon Mystery Dungeon AUs, or if you're giving characters fursonas (I mean, I know plenty of autistic furries!). But if you're writing things where human characters who are autistic or autistic-coded were never truly "human," you need to be careful that you don't slip into ableist tropes that hurt people like Anon here and myself.

[notabled-noodle]

First of all thanks for being such a safe place and always providing good advice.

I just need to vent a little and get those thoughts out of my head and it feels like this is the only safe place for me to do this right now. I would appreciate advice if you have any but if not than thats totally fine as well. It's really more about just talking to someone (My therapist is on vacation and it showes /hj).

I noticed recently that I fantasies about being disabled a lot. And I feel really bad about it. I know I should be thankful that I am able-bodied and that I only have ADHD and issues with depression and anxiety.

But I still catch myself fantasising about being more disabled (or disabled at all. I don't consider myself as disabled but ADHD is a disability I think?). I've fantasised about going blind or deaf, losing my ability to speak, losing a limb and stuff like that.

And I don't understand why I do that. I am healthy and that's good. I'm thankful for that. I don't actually want to go blind or deaf. Losing the ability to speak sounds horrible to me because I really like to talk a lot. I don't want anything to happen to me but I also can't stop fantasising about it. That dosen't make sense.

The only reason I could think of is that maybe I believe that I would get more support if I were to be more disabled? Gosh that sounds really abelist. It probably is, I'm sorry.

I just want those thoughts/fantasies to stop. They make me feel like I'm a horrible, ungrateful person. But I can't stop. And that's probably a sign that there is something mentaly wrong with me that I haven't figured out yet.

I’m not a psychologist, but I’d agree with your evaluation of the situation — it’s a kind of internalised ableism, and you’re not the only person who experiences similar.

it’s common in trauma spaces to wish your trauma was worse, and it’s common in chronic illness spaces to wish you were sicker. it’s not because we actually want to be in a worse situation, but because we want to have our cries for help taken seriously. this sounds like another form of that.

the belief that physically disabled people inherently get treated with more respect than mentally disabled people is ableist, but it’s not your fault that you’re having these thoughts — you were raised in an ableist society, and this is going to impact the way your brain expresses pain/distress

I think the way to deal with this is to try to deal with the underlying internalised ableism. take your ADHD seriously. acknowledge that you have a disability, and that you deserve to have that accommodated and helped. this is a hard process, and it won’t happen overnight, but it’s worth it

remember to be kind to yourself

[butch-bakugo]

Not sure how else to explain this but the whole idea that if you tell someone to stop hyperfixating on something or tell them that you cant consume certain things critically is ableist is bs.

Warning, bitch long, yeet

Like, its very very centered around adhd people who have bigoted interests and value their fandom over actual support of oppressed people. Its very clear yall veiw adhd and autisitc people as children who " just cant help it" which is ableist. I personally am professionally diagnosed with adhd and autism, i cant fully control (to an extent) what i hyperfixate on but i can control my own actions.

Like recently, ive found myself wanting to go watch pewdiepie videos and rewatch the anime hetalia, both are things i HEAVILY hyperfixated on for 4 or more years. Both things are horribly racist and i am well aware of this now after their inital popularity waves have died out. However, i am mature enough to notice when my hyperfixation is about to start rehappening cause ive had it before.

Ive hyperfixated and unhyperfixated on fnaf and undertale on and off for years. I know what that first itch of " oooo... Im kinda getting attached again" feels like and any adhd or autisitc person CAN. Its litterally one of the first positive things about haveing these disorders that people notice. We know when a new interest has the potential of starting and wr can quite litterally feel it like every other person, nd or nt.

But the difference between a person who is using the whole argument of " i have adhd so you cant hold me morally responsible for supporting harry potter" as an excuse to keep helping a bigoted creator vs a mature adhd individual who can not control their hyperfixations is their actions after the intial " shit! its by a bad person/its bigoted!"

If someone with adhd and/or autism is drawing and posting fanart, buying shitloads of merch, making cosplays, posting about it, talking about it constantly to friends and reccommending it to people as being the holy grail of interesting things? Thats not critical consumption. Your just being a intentionally blind consumer. Even if they are re-entering an old interest and have old merch, your still wearing it out/posting it in public to advertise it to others.

Your that bigoted creator's walking propaganda

Just cause i noticed that im wanting to rewatch hetalia or pewdiepie dosent mean i dont have the self control to go watch something or someone else that im interested in that isnt racist. People with adhd and autism have self control over these actions. Yeah we cant control if we start stimming or bouncing our legs cause we are getting hyper, but we can control who we watch and what we monetarily support.

I have old hetalia shirts, i dont wear them in public. Thats a pj shirt now because i dont want others to ask about hetalia and get interested in it because they saw me in it. I dont want to advertise that i was a dumb kid who liked a racist old anime. Liking hetalia isnt a good thing and i should feel at least abit of shame that i ever liked it.

Im not gonna shame my 13 yr old self for not noticing racism that wasnt blatant and hateful but instead romantizing nazi japan but im still gonna shame myself for not noticing racism period. Yeah, i do believe the 13 yr olds who still support dream and buy his shit and post fanart but think its ok cause they are " consuming critically" should feel ashamed. If you know you like something or someone regardless of their horrendously terrible actions, you should be ashamed of yourself. That dosent mean kick your ass about it but you should still feel that.

Basically, us adhd and autisitc people know when we are about to hyperfixate on something and we feel emotions strongly enough that if we find the bigotry in it to be bad enough, guilt will build up( as it SHOULD. Cause you are guilty of supporting a bigot.) Till we dont feel comfortable fuckin around with it anymore and boom! Hyperfixation gone. I was hyperfixating on fnaf till the shit about scott came out and suddenly, my hyperfix took a u-turn. I was starting to hyperfix on oran high school host club as i was watching it then they started saying tranny and being weirdly transphobic/homophobic and condoning/glorifying incest and boom! Hyperfix is dead in the water.

The thing about autisitc people is we tend to have our own strict moral code that we do NOT want to break. I dont think stealing from random people is a good thing so when i play a video game, i get crazy nervous trying to steal things. If i break one of my own morals, i feel like im rotting alive in anguish. I looked through my gfs phone once cause i suspected cheating, didnt find anything. I think looking through your partner's phone is a pretty shitty and invading thing unless cheating has already been a confirmed issue so i felt very guilty. Planned on staying quiet about it, didnt happen, i told her in under 10 minutes of it happening and she forgave me. We still feel bad for shit that happened when we were like 8.

So yeah, the only time an autistic person wont feel guilty about supporting bigoted work/bigoted artists shit is if that bigotry dosent go aginest that internal code. Yes, that autistic friend of yours who unapologetically supports dream, dosent think racism is bad enough to feel guilty about it. Its not that hard.

Another thing is that we can control our own actions. We arnt immature enough to just be utterly incapable of not watch pewdiepie 😭 when our brain remembers our old interests. We can control ourselves enough to understand that and not click on his videos. We are mature enough to sit down, sigh, remember his actions and the things he promotes, understand the harm he caused to many people, understand that if this hyperfixation is ignored that it will pass then click on a markiplier video and forget about it. Any adhd or autisitc person who tells you otherwise is either a. Not getting the help they need to cope,b. Telling you some bullshit just so youll stop asking why they think a racist is funny or c. Dosent actually care about the damage done by racists enough to feel moral guilt over supporting one.

Final note: people with adhd and autism, though can not control their hyperfixations, can control their own actions. They can stop themselves from consuming shitty bigoted content by shitty bigoted people and " critical consumption" is an excuse.

[transmeds]

My apologies, another person in your replies said “Anon you realize that exact logic is and HAS been used to justify the deliberate misgendering of trans people, right” and I thought it was you. Anyhow, there is no reason to get so nasty, I’m just asking you to explain your thoughts on this since you frequently post in the tags with your opinions. Being a “boy” or a “girl” is a social role, not necessarily a gender. So, yeah, it’s possible to take on a different gender role than the one associated with your gender. Since roles are often conflated with gender, they tend to be used interchangeably. People who are PNC often use “wrong” pronouns to express their complicated relationship with gender identity. Aside from this, some people use certain pronouns for themselves because they simply enjoy them, which is their own prerogative. So, then, you’re against being PNC because 1) it’s too complicated for you personally to process and that is somehow deserving of your vitriol and 2) you feel that English grammar and syntax rules are more important than respecting people’s referential language? How is challenging language any different than challenging gender stereotypes, as one would do being GNC? Do you prioritize your comfort over the dignity of other transgender people, or do you seriously think that language is sacred? Words are created all the time and definitions change with their usage. It sounds that rather than even attempt to accommodate your brethren, you would prefer to latch on to the anti-PNC position so you have some excuse to not challenge your notions of “gendered” language. As a person with an auditory processing disorder myself that impacts my life greatly, that is not an excuse for you not to better yourself, even if it is difficult for you. Other people do not deserve your anger for simply existing with pronouns that challenging the status quo. If you *definitively and actively know* a person’s pronouns are contrary to their appearance or identity and you refuse to even try to refer to them properly, that is not an issue with processing, but with conflating pronouns with gender identity at the best and willfully choosing to disrespect them at the worst. That can’t be explained away by saying you have a processing disorder. Do not attempt to paint being PNC as ableist because you are unwilling to challenge your deep-seeded, actively obsolescent beliefs. Having a processing disorder makes people rely on context. If you are communicating with or about someone whose pronouns you know, PNC or otherwise, you have been provided the context. You are choosing to either ignore it for your own comfort and a lack of desire to improve yourself or because you think language is more important than people. If I’m wrong, prove it.

i didnt mean to get nasty i just dnt have a good concept of whats too mean n stuff.

i love that you consistently add more to what i am saying and look to deep into it to paint me as a bad person but i will get to that later. its hard to pay attention to one thing at a time but i will try 2 go in order.

being a boy or girl isnt a social role,, its just being a girl or boy?? like a kid female n kid male like. thats not a role thts a fucking.. way to describe someones gender when theyre a kid?? like i cannot even understand why i have to say that. wtf do u think being a girl/boy is?? its a way to describe someones gender, like pronouns. not a role or gender expression.

im not against it because its too complicated or that i want to disrespect ppls pronouns or something like that you want to put into my mouth. challenging a language is different than challenging gender rules because language was made with a purpose and one that still matters today. gender roles never served a solid purpose, them getting removed doesn't matter at all.

this is really pointless because youre going to keep refusing to recognize that language is important and that pronouns aren't something that you just use to make yourself happy, they are a tool in language that serve two singular purposes. to replace a name. and to describe the person in a gendered way. getting rid of gender should just mean getting rid of pronouns all together because they are pointless without any description of the person that they are being used for. because then you cant fucking tell who they're talking about at all. this is why robots struggle with pronouns :)

its funny to me that you add "appearance" to "identity" as if 1. they match. 2. that i at all ever said they have to watch appearance. if you didnt know im NOT PASSING. 3. as if appearance matters <3

this isnt about me wanting to be rude or not challenge gender roles or anything, im a very gnc man myself. this is about the fact that pronouns only real purpose is to tell you what gender someone is, not if they're masculine or feminine or just like the sound of them. this is why getting called "she/her" makes the majority trans men dysphoric, but why wearing dresses or having traditionally feminine roles won't make the majority of them dysphoric.

you clearly aren't listening to what im saying so i dont see why you insist on replying and putting things in my mouth from finding excuses like "someone else said it" to whatever youre going to make for trying to say i just dont like people who r pnc and am using processing an an excuse, instead of an example of why its important this time.

language isnt more important than people, but people can not exist as is without a way of communicating. trying to tear down communication because you dont like its rules just make what it is to be human harder to be. i cannot be myself to anyone else if there is no words to describe who i am in a strictly male or unrelated sense. there's a difference verison of you to every person you know, and you can't make it remotely accurate without the words to express it.

[latulasbian-1]

what are your thoughts on kankri? personally i never understood the appeal and im interested to hear your take since he Was on the b tier of your list

OK! Sorry for lateness but I only noticed your question at like 2:00 AM and needed a full tank of brain-gas to be able to convey my thoughts even semi-coherently. 

So Kankri’s a weird one, probably one of the most convoluted and self-contradictory characters in Homestuck. Its fitting given he’s pretty much a one note joke and hussie’s one-note joke characters actually wind up being either his most oddly complex (see: equius and feferi for instance) or most sympathetic (see: Nepeta). Kankri’s a bit of both imo, though I wouldn’t call him a favorite for me. 

Kankri’s characterization is built almost entirely on one fuckin’ note: “LOL AIN’T TUMBLR SJWs FUNNY AND ANNOYING!?!?!?”. If you disagree with this then I don’t even know what to tell you, bc everything from his style of long-winded monologues (that wind up running up on Hussie Ableism Moments bc in-narrative his infodumping is supposed to be annoying???) to his inability to take social cues to his supposed-to-be-interpreted-as-excessive use of trigger warnings to his unapologetic killjoy attitude to his supposed hypocrisy/”privilege” are literally all just a fucking layer cake of anti-SJW stereotypes. This is where the issue of how the fandom interprets Kankri kicks in, as people’s opinions on him (aside from a few diehards) tend to scale from “DAWWW CUTE WIDDLE UPPITY BEANBOY” to “fucking annoying neoliberal”. For the matter, neither of these are intended by Hussie, while he did design him to be cute he wasn’t meant to be hateable for leftist homestuck fans as a (neo-)liberal or faux leftist. Hussie just designed him after everyone hussie found annoying in the social justice community primarily on tumblr. Even his political monologues, though not WITHOUT hypocrisy and bullshit, tend to actually skew towards “pretty fucking reasonable hussie just thinks people being upset by bad stuff is stupid”.  

Now, people cite Kankri being ableist in his criticism of certain other dancestors for ~conforming to stereotypes~, which yes from an in context scenario is pretty fucking bad. If someone IRL is dealing with their disability in a way you think seems pretty stereotypical keep that thought to yourself. HOWEVER, AS ONE OF THE MOST CRUCIAL POINTS TOWARDS KANKRI BEING GENERALLY SYMPATHETIC, WE GET THE META ELEMENT. Hussie, in writing a hypocritical mansplainer who goes on and on and on about everything thats politically incorrect about the people around him, practically beat-for-beat replicates talking points PEOPLE HAVE USED TO CRITICIZE HOMESTUCK ITSELF. YES! MITUNA’S PRESENTATION AS A CHARACTER IS 100% UNAMBIGUOUSLY AWFUL IN ITS PORTRAYAL OF PEOPLE WITH BRAIN INJURIES AND MENTAL DISORDERS. DAMARA IS A RACIST STEREOTYPE SO BAD HUSSIE SHOULD GET THROWN IN JAIL. INCEST IS BAD. If ANYONE in homestuck should’ve pulled the meta knowledge shit in post-canon, kankri would’ve been a WAYYYYYY better candidate than dirk for it, especially since kankri seems halfway to realizing he’s fictional just by political analysis of the story he’s in! Kankri seems to exist at the apex of Hussie’s confusion about fandom, given he’s baffled enough by people being obsessed with his work yet so intensely negative that he can only seem to think of them as obsessive manchild wierdos with no sense of rational thought. As someone who myself unironically loves Homestuck and yet have an entire third of my brain dedicated to ripping it apart on an ethical level, I can see some of myself in that turtleneck’d contrarian. Just because someone is a fan of something doesn’t mean they will or should unthinkingly defend it from all recourse. This is something homestuck as a whole struggles with, I think back to the aspect or extended zodiac quiz where one of the questions amounted to “someone is talking shit about a show you like, how do you respond” and there wasn’t even an answer for “actually listen to what they’re trying to say and consider if they could be right”. Kankri is a symbol of sorts for those critical enjoy-ers, in a way. A stupid silly not-that-meaningful way, but a way. I think people should reclaim him. 

I’ve touched on it a bit before, but the last main sympathizing aspect of kankri for me (aside from personality things like his frankly unearned patience with a friend group that entirely fucking hates his guts) is a trait share by almost all the dancestors: Hussie’s fucking disturbing use of mental illness & psychiatric disorders with them. Between Kankri’s unwillingness to observe common social cues, his overtly poised and practiced manner of speaking, his obsession with using trigger warnings to warn off confrontation in leu of not just speaking his mind with everything, his tendency to cling to certain articles of clothing for long periods of time, his implied difficulty taking care of himself physically, and the fucking insulting “mom-friend useless-manchild-who-needs-nannying” dynamic he has with Porrim, he comes off (intentionally or no) as a beat-for-beat embodiment of an autistic person as seen through Hussie’s tropey and horribly ableist worldview. This is a common trait he shares with both Aranea and Mituna, as well as many of the other dancestors to lesser degrees (many of them, like Mituna, also have OTHER mental disorders flat-out-stated in such a way that makes their depiction just fucking confused and bad). For me, and for at least SOME other people, it makes unbiased critical reactions to them damn near impossible. They deserve better than how hussie can write them. In a lot of ways I have friends like Kankri, and Hussie’d almost fucking certainly find them just as embarrassing and annoying as he meant for Kankri to be. 

So yeah, Kankri isn’t my favorite by any means but i don’t feel like i can or should condemn him. He’s fun. I’d watch his video essays. 

And this isn’t even BEGINNING to touch on how much I loathe Porrim as an example of “good cool fun feminists that hussie can sexualize!” And her more open bisexuality than other trolls being both a tool for fetishization by Hussie and a fucking skin-crawling thing to use as a contrast for Kanaya’s status as either “the only confirmed lesbian in homestuck (until postcanon showed rose was a lesbian too)” or “the only lesbian troll in existence ever bc thats totally how sexuality would work with aliens” (sorry if you ascribe to the “all trolls are bisexual bc they’re supposedly binormative as a get-out-of-jail-free card for hussie’s hetero-ass ship tease shit” then. well get better soon) 

(seriously though everyone who pulls the “kanaya is the only lesbian alternian” shit owes every lesbian 100 dollars) 

[littlebabycrybtch]

tbh... we have absolutely FAILED ppl with ea/ting disor.ders so fucking unimaginably bad, especially the visibly underweight ones. and we are still failing them to this day by avoiding valuable education out of discomfort and demonization. its genuinely appalling sometimes, to see just how Dangerously ignorant ppl are about this shit. bros listen 2 me rn. you are not a doctor, and you are Not going cure an ed with your almost laughably ignorant and malicious ‘reverse psychology’ bit where you call someone an ugly skeleton knocking on deaths door whos body needs to be banned from instagram forever, because you’re just ‘so scared theyre gonna die’ or w/e so you can legit pretend they dont exist, holy fucking Shit dude. that shame-and-shun tactic is so unbelievably dangerous. like, if you knew Anything REAL abt these disorders or frankly any mental health issues and cared enough to apply that then you would understand how thats just... pure cruelty. im sorry to be blunt but yeah this isnt a joke, it needs to be said that you are easily going to KILL SOMEONE with that kind of unfiltered uneducated IGNORANCE. it is inexcusably selfish, harmful, and ableist behavior, we have to stop this already.

imo there’s a Lot to be said about the toxicity spiral thats become the pro recovery movement and how much it rejects and speaks over the people its Supposed to support, becoming more about ‘anti symptoms’ than pro anything, but if you are gonna understand Anything new today at least learn this;;; hating yourself at unhealthy is Never ever going to be the key to loving yourself at healthy. being ashamed of yourself FOR being unhealthy, will NOT make you healthier, it’ll make you worse every time. im not tryna be mean but honestly how the actual FUCK do yalls brains work, it is SO wildly damaging to let yourself perpetuate this type of mindset, and then still claim pro recovery or w/e like recovery doesnt have to start at unhealthy??? like itll just happen overnight??? like that’ll help??? like if ppl catch you displaying symptoms of the disorder you LITERALLY HAVE, you arent allowed to talk abt it in any form without intense open negativity towards it and yourself, so ppl know ur definitely totally against it tho and not enabling urself, bc if you dont talk abt ur shame and embarrassment for it that means you arent recovering and need a mob after you??? thats how you think people are gonna get better????

ffs dont try to viciously shame yourself out of bad habits and treat your disorders like taboo, respect and love yourself wholly, the good and the bad, if you want to form better habits!!! ppl NEED to be encouraged to love themselves at unhealthy if they ever want to improve. you are not going to accidentally make them worse by not constantly shaming all their ‘flaws’, they are not MADE of ‘flaws’. by showing support for the mentally ill, you are not fucking supporting their ‘symptoms’, you are a supporting THE FUCKING PERSON EXPERIENCING THEM. and you DESPERATELY NEED TO DO THAT!! there is MORE TO THEM than their symptoms! there are things to COMPLIMENT them on besides their body! its gotten to this point that like. ppl are actually Afraid of just being nice to ppl with eds. they dont even wanna treat them like Humans outside of their disorder, all they see is a disorder. everyone is just SO afraid of ‘enabling’ them by not being vocally against their symptoms that they avoid them like the plague and dont even try to build them up, which is what they fucking need more than anything dude!! 

ppl think refusing to ever let an underweight person feel pretty or love their body where they are at is what they need and will force them to recover, or they think giving them goals like ‘you’ll be so much happier with a bigger body’ and ‘keep going one day you wont look so sick’ is at all different than their own internal dialogue, when the Truth (that people need to fucking know by now!), is that shame with mental health is incredibly dangerous, eds are diverse but theyre most often rooted in starvation as a form of self harm from an unwavering self hatred and feeling of failure or lack of control, one they already have deeply ingrained and will usually feel at Any Size, which is why so many feel unsatisfied and keep going and going till they die. the answer to this problem isnt gonna be inflicting more fucking self hate or pressure. thats gasoline on a fire. you cannot just try and. UNO REVERSE CARD THE ~RULES~ OF THEIR FUCKING MENTAL DISORDER and expect RECOVERY... oh my god dude, please, id laugh out loud if this wasnt so malicious.

listen, if you wanna help, like actually Care about Helping the way you claim the root of your attitude is, you need to make that person feel like they can love themselves, not try to make them ‘realize’ how ‘bad’ they are and how uncomfortable and scared they make you and how Not Allowed their behavior is, bc 1. body dysmorphia is a delusion,,, denial is a common association with addictive/self destructive behaviors,,,, you are going about it wrong if thats the first thing you try to accomplish, and 2. whether you like it or not ‘bad’ is gonna be your first checkpoint! who would be motivated to get better when all you’re doing is giving them an already failing grade and pushing them back??? 

you’re all just... so paralyzed by ignorant fear every time you interact with someone with an ed bc you are so fucking detached from it as a concept, but you wont LEARN how to BEHAVE AROUND THESE PPL! LIKE! and then you claim you act this way ‘because you care'. ok then why do you feel like you dont have to listen or learn??? why dont you see these tactics as needlessly cruel when its explained??? bc oh you cant ‘’’’’trust’’’’ ppl with eds to tell You how to help Them, right??? they’re probably lying, you know better than them ofc. smhhh, every other mental illness community gets to speak for themselves to the ppl without their experiences and therefore the ability to hurt them, sure, but not the sneaky ed people, they created pr.0/a.na/, (the ONLY existing space for encouraging mentally ill ppl in self destructive behaviors, obviously), so they dont know what they need, they have to be Told by Normal people bc their irrational brains are Just Too Broken. (/s)............ like.............?? it is Sooo fuckin prejudiced and disgusting tbh. we gotta do better than this. 

eds are almost completely left out of communities for mental health these days. its seriously so disappointing. if you ACTUALLY ‘care’, then ok you need to swallow your pride and do better, you need to Listen and not let your personal discomforts (genuine triggers excluded!) with their appearance or behaviors get in the way of how humanized and committed your decent treatment of their disorder is. tbr, sometimes you arent just ‘concerned’ about a person, sometimes how you go about your feelings is rooted in your inner urge to validate your own discomforts with them, which means it might end up more about you than about them, which hurts them. i mean for the love of god, these ppl are not ‘irresponsible’ for existing around others with their ~unhealthy bodies~, they are not a walking trigger and cant be treated like one, they arent contagious, they will not benefit mentally from hearing you say you think they should be physically banned from posting selfies or w/e, that isolation WONT prevent eds from ~~~spreading~~~ and will severely harm the person in question, you are not making a heroic decision to try and bully them away to ‘save’ others from ever being around them or save them from being around an “enabling” (supportive recovery/not shameful) community. you are not ‘fixing’ them by making them hate their underweight bodies. you’re LITERALLY just ignorant and prejudiced and ableist, your ideas are actually Very harmful, you are not a savior, you are making it worse, plain and simple. Please just start doing better already, its kind of a life or death situation here

[sonicthecringehog]

you think me saying someone doesn't care about you is really abusive? yeah i see you posting about me in your discord.

TW: ABUSE; R*PE, SUICIDE, GASLIGHTING. Alrighty gather 'round children - I think I know exactly who you are now so I'm going to lay it down for you, maybe this is me being a sociopath with a victim complex as ableist as that sounds to my followers. Allow me to educate you, even if you think this is manipulation too~ Now, I may have grown up very privileged - considering my mother had escaped literal poverty, and my father escaping a cycle of intergenerational trauma from actual abuse. I will never deny that and I am grateful for all of the things I have and have worked hard for myself. But dude I have clinically diagnosed PTSD that I only just found out about last week after spending a few days in an actual psych ward - they genuinely thought I possibly had either bipolar disorder or schizophrenia because of how bad of a state I was in, I couldn't eat or sleep for days. I learned that when I rushed into a convenience store crying and shaking, and just apologizing constantly because I didn't even have a mask and my phone was dead, so I had no idea how to get to the hospital. I did not want to be turned away yet again out of looking like a walking stereotype (looking at you, Karens). And just before that, confession I broke into a friend’s house because I took his word literally that the door is always open, and someone convinced me I was gaslighting the both of them which is exactly what sent me spiralling to begin with. But anyway, the people at the store were really understanding even if it was just a liability thing, and they called the police for me, and the police contacted a social worker for me to get my story out and they all reassured me that I was doing the right thing - and eventually, I got the help I needed and I realized it's time to take back my life once and for all.

Not even strong antipsychotics like olanzapine, what I'm currently prescribed with, helps me in those times. I wake up with cold sweats, I have constant nightmares I don't tell people about because I don't want to fuck them up the way I got this way. And now I understand why my aunt from my dad's side of the family who was apparently schizophrenic took her own life, and never told anyone her struggles either. And why my dad was so overprotective of me for so long. You see, I live in constant fear for my life because I have dealt with actually violent, clinical psychopaths who only think for themselves and will instead lie through their teeth to make it seem like they'd changed. And they stalk you or just cling onto you, to try and find every little detail about you to use as ammo against you because they know they can, and will manipulate people into thinking you're the one abusing them and manipulating everyone around you until they have no use for you anymore. Lots of shit happened but honestly if I just accepted that "no one cares" and I just learned to "shut the fuck up and think before I speak," like my actual abusers would say... I'd be a single mother living in poverty right now, and I would probably have lost custody of that child to my one abuser at that time because he is exactly like this. I don't like talking about it because I know how triggering it is for some and this might blow up again like a lot of my "controversial" posts, but if I didn't accidentally stress and overwork myself into having a miscarriage in the bathroom at my work, I would have become the walking stereotype my other abusers would try to implant in people's minds. And I feel horrible and responsible for all the shit I'm causing now, because I know of people with diagnosed NPD or ASPD and they're trying to better themselves, and do their part in the world without hurting people. You really can't win no matter what side you're on. Hell, I developed a saviour complex over the course of a few years because I've seen some vulnerable people get taken advantage of like this, too without ever understanding why so they constantly find themselves being abused without realizing it, it's heartbreaking to me. I was r*ped at 7, not from the stereotypical creepy uncle. But a girl my own age who I'm pretty sure was abused herself, which is why I never held anything against her. Maybe it's my Stockholm Syndrome talking again. Regardless, I learned that you can't change a person. The only person you can change is yourself. However, sometimes those strangers who show basic human decency knowing one's past, are that ultimate kick in the ass to motivate people to save themselves.

So let this ask post be a lesson to all of you. These kinds of abusers I had also knew exactly how to dogwhistle me to try and get a reaction, exactly what to say and how to act in front of authority figures - to manipulate them into thinking I was the abuser or whatever ableist walking stereotype they wanted people to think. Hence, I was gaslighted into thinking I was on the autism spectrum my whole life by the people around me growing up, and that my close family and friends were the “real” abusers even though they were trying to help but didn’t know how... without these people even realizing who the real culprits were. Growing up being The Girl Who Cried Wolf even when you did nothing you were aware of, fucks you up for life, my friend. And that's exactly what they wanted. Maybe I do need a break from social media as even my family doctor says, maybe I do need to let myself be "cancelled" again to grow stronger from this. Because I'm not saying you specifically are abusive or a bad person per se, because I don’t even know who you are, I could have easily deleted and ignored this. But just let people live and stop trying to take away what little innocence they have left that they lost at a very early age... out of being too comfortable in your own magical fantasy world of self-pity to get your own shit together. Because shit like this is exactly why I overwork myself and get these "manic" episodes as my abusers called it, as live in fear that I might actually get shot one day when things seem to finally be stable and peaceful. Hell, I might never be able to get a real job because of shit like this. But if you want to report my posts again on my Instagram which I'm pretty sure was you at this point, go right ahead. Because you need to grow the fuck up... and to the other people reading this, don't ever let anyone tell you that no one cares or your feelings aren't valid, because there are people who do understand and will help you, even if to them you're just a passerby on the street. Because people do care.

This kind of cancel culture and bullying people out of getting help without giving them a chance to explain themselves, while doxxing and overanalyzing every post one says to use against them... has been so normalized in our society that we often do glorify the people who show basic human decency. When it should have been the standard all along. On to the point, I wish you all a wonderful journey to a beautiful recovery too - I might not be active for a bit because I think I need a break ^_^'

TL;DR: Don't feed the trolls, kiddies, but don't let them win out of fear that no one will believe you even with concrete proof. To make a bad Sonic reference - if you see someone abusing their power over you and doesn't want you to thrive because they think you're nothing more than some welfare queen attention whore... THATS NO GOOD~

(Also excuse all the edits, I’ve been spiralling mentally because holy shit I don’t appreciate being stalked and doxxed y’all regardless of who is doing this... so I’m keeping this post up as a reminder to all of you to just not feed the trolls and keep moving forward. Hell, someone on Snapchat kept stupidly adding me by my number for a few months on and off, so this is why I get in these situations where I’m kiiiinda scared for my life. I admitted myself to the hospital but ended up leaving after asking for resources for these kinds of situational crises. Oof. ^_^”)

Anyways, toodle-oo fuck you too bitch. ;)

~ Serena

[gryphsdeadbones]

hey from one nd person to another the comic where fm gordon says a slur seems kind of in poor taste. ik ur not intentionally making light of it and tht occurring in fm should be criticized but while you dont make it out to be a good thing making jokes about it and calling him a "slurboy" is kind of questionable? it makes it seem more like a plotpoint and angst rather than the creator of fm genuinely fucking up in the past (and having moved on from it)! i think exploring fm coming to terms with being nd is a good idea but this isnt the best way to do it. if you want me to explain my point more lmk if/when u post this and i will! someone already made a post abt it but it was kinda strongly worded and i wanted to approach you more calmly because i genuinely dont want to call you out or start drama or anything ;-;

first off thank you for being civil and patient with me i appreciate this ask a lot- also this got long- im not in a flying rage or anything when i bold or emphasis text, i just needed it also for my own readability and since im not the best at wording- hopefully this hellsite works and my response is under the cut

i would like to know how is it in poor taste when freemind explicitly gets clocked at the very end for saying it. the entire point of the comic was to show that saying the r slur has existed in his source and is bad

im not sure how much more direct i can get, with the disclaimer/warning list growing longer and longer and out there for a huge sign that says “this au can get dark as fuck and these subject matters are treated seriously/not something to mess around with.” Like yes, there are some jokes in the asks and other comics, but that specific comic is not supposed to be “haha thats funny”. it has a serious tone using a rough sketch style bc i was super tired and wanted to vent

was it just the direct reference to it that just made people uncomfortable? because thats 100% understandable, and i made sure i tagged it appropriately (although admittedly, a little bit late since i thought the filter would catch at least the main thing)

i think what some people somehow got from it is “exploring sensitive content = endorsing said content” which! that is not the intent! i absolutely do not want people saying that word! I don’t want people thinking that is any way okay for this character to say

its more of a damned if i do address it, damned if i dont.

if it never comes up, people are gonna assume that ‘oh this character says slurs and is shit, surely the creator or fan-creator MUST be okay with it and woobifies freemind and absolves him of any mistakes’ or something like that. no. this asshole has an arc and i want to do it right. its serious and i think it shouldn’t be shoved under the rug

and people just. dont want to read for context for whatever reason. theyll start watching it and get taken aback by the slur and start blaming me ‘hey you never warned for this’ when very early on i keep mentioning over and over ‘you dont have to watch it if you dont want to! This has slurs and 2000s internet brand humor/style’ You really dont, I’m not forcing you to watch it- Literally all you need to know is either canon half life or hl/vrai. thats it. fm mostly follows hl1 with very slight changes.

so i had to make something that:

1. warns people who arent aware and dont want to go through my asks or about/warning pages (for whatever reason) and just want to see the art

2. also NOT downplay freemind’s canon assholery. listen, i kinda despise writing mean and cruel characters, theyre hard to do, and a lot of people get shit for doing it wrong or people going “character = author”

i’ve also considered leaving the bubbles blank, but then people could fill it with whatever they want, then blame me for being vague. or they’d fill it in with a different kind of slur that freemind has never used, even if he MIGHT be the type to do that. I needed to explicitly mention that it is ableist slur. There are shitty racist and other problematic jokes, but never those kinds of extreme racial slurs to my knowledge.

Although I do see your point that maybe joking about it outside of the serious stuff might not be the best route. The slurboy jokes are getting stale, and I will try a better way to remind people.

The thing that gets to me is that it feels people are more than ready to defend either Ross Scott or Gordon Freeman the fictonal character himself. I don’t??? really care for Ross Scott, so I don’t know if he’s ever brought it up specifically. I’m not really calling him out or cancelling him. Idc for some white man’s feelings, im only bringing the timeframe of That era and reworking it to fit in This current era.

And I hate to break it to people: Gordon Freeman is a blank slate character, you can project whatever the hell you want on him as long as it’s not freakshit illegal garbage. The machinimas (fm, hl/vrai) do have SOME characterization that I want to nail down. It fucking sucks when characters are ooc, and I’m trying not to do that, even if it means sacrificing some comfort. But still mostly staying in my comfort zone if that makes sense

Now about the callout that I do not want to engage with the op directly:

Honestly im very surprised the comic was called out when i just. thought my stuff is relatively tame on exploring the bad shit canon freemind does. ive seen him in fancontent where they really dont hold back and its still played off as ‘kinda funny’ tone.

I really don’t know if people just want any reason to hate me for whatever reason. That’s fine I guess, I can’t please everyone and they dont have to like me.

But like. isn’t it so much easier for the op of that to block me and the post and move on. Why kick up such a fuss. I can see that thinly veiled death threat of a vague. That’s pretty fucked up- Like holy fucking god, you do not have to like my stuff. I’m not holding you at knifepoint to like my stuff. I’ve specifically made two different tags (one general au, one specific au) if anyone wants to blacklist it for their own reasons I do not need to know. I don’t want to know.

You’re allowed to be uncomfortable. You’re allowed to unfollow/blacklist/block.

However you just don’t go ranting about it for something you horribly misinterpreted. If it bothers you so badly, literally just. drop me a message to clarify. thats it. or save yourself the time and block me.

I’ve blocked the op for both our sakes, but if anyone wants to send this post to them, then thats fine. I don’t want anything to do with them.

I don’t want to link the post and blow it up. I just want shit clarified, dropped and we can move the fuck on with our lives. 

If you’re reading this and don’t know what the post is, please don’t bother. I do not want people going after the op with threats, please keep it civil, I’d prefer if you don’t engage with the post at all on my behalf.

Despite this huge wall of text, I do not want this to be a big deal, so please don’t ask me about the details.

_

As for anon, feel free to dm me either on here or. Maybe on discord if you’d still like to suggest or have something more cleared up. I’m still willing to hear any kind of feedback, and i want to thank you again for being reasonable about this

[euphorealis]

these are my hot takes and no i will not elaborate on them.

morals dont exist. they’re man made. why should we decide what is considered good or bad.

God is non-binary.

a majority of school expectations are ableist and there is a lot of things that should be stopped in the school system.

we made money. we created it. why the fuck cant we just make more if we need so we aren’t in debt. we’re the ones who made up inflation for it, we did that, we created that, so we can also destroy that.

if you’re part of the LGBTQ+ community, you don’t have to have some sort of “official” coming out thing. You don’t need to have a big talk with your parents or friends if you don’t want to. You can quietly come out, or not at all. You can also come out multiple times, thats okay too.

Children owe their parents absolutely nothing, because they did not ask to be born.

It’s okay to not have a partner or significant other in your life. You don’t need someone to grow old with.

We should stop using small talk, and just jump straight into big talk.

Making one object be the basis of your entire personality is annoying. Don’t do that.

Jesus would have been at the BLM protests if he were here, and he would have been fighting for equal rights.

Art can be pretty much anything. It doesn’t have to be good.

Being called an old soul isn’t a compliment, it’s just telling someone that their trauma is noticeable.

School should not be so enforced. There are jobs you can get that don’t need school and are still decent pay.

Living with your parents at an older age should be normalized. Parents who kick their kids out at 18 are evil and should not do that shit.

Winter is superior for multiple reasons, but those reasons have nothing to do with Christmas.

I don’t care if your love language is physical touch, don’t force touch onto people unless you know it’s okay. Figure out a secondary love language

Having stuffed animals should not be seen as childish.

Men should be taught to not fucking rape.

Teens should be able to talk with their parents comfortably about sex ed, and shouldn’t get in trouble for wanting to have sex before being an adult.

Being gay doesn’t give you the excuse to be a fucking douchebag.

White people need to be reminded of their privilege way more often.

If you say you support those with mental illnesses and mental disorders, but then get grossed out by what the mental illnesses and disorders cause, you don’t fucking support them. If you’re grossed out because someone says they haven’t been able to shower for a while, or they haven’t brushed their teeth in a week or two, you don’t fucking support them. You only support the traits that don’t bother anyone, like sleeping a lot.

Mental illness and mental disorder organizations should be run by people with those illnesses and disorders; people who don’t have those issues are helping hands in the organizations, not the leaders.

Cut people off if they don’t make you happy. It’s as simple as that.

Magic does exist but it’s not in the way that people would imagine. it’s not like harry potter.

there should be some sort of tv program that shows men what it’s like being a woman, and how terrifying it can be.

parents should stop sexualising their own childreb.

America is not the best country, nor is it one of the best. It’s considerably one of the worst ones

fucking get rid of guns.

there are too many police officers, we need to cut back on them.

halloween is for all ages. no one should be made fun of for trick or treating because they’re older.

if you wanna be confident, you have to stop giving a fuck about everything and let things go.

dont comment on peoples bodies ever.

the rich should be taxed by a lot.

normalize taking medication for mental illnesses and disorders. dont ask if taking the meds is only temporary, it makes us feel like shit about it.

it is not a good thing if you have no filter when you talk. you need to fucking learn to think before you talk, and fucking learn that people do get offended by what you say because of your “no filter” shit.

if you only reach out to someone when you want to talk about you, and you don’t bother to ask about the other person, you’re not their friend, and you’re a bad fucking friend. if you only reach out to them as a last resort for things, you’re a bad fucking friend. if they’re trying to talk about how they’ve been feeling and you flip it around and make it about you so they’re comforting you instead, YOU’RE A BAD FUCKING FRIEND. if you don’t check in on your friends at all, you’re a bad fucking friend. if you notice that a friend has stopped talking and starting conversations with you, but you don’t do anything, you’re a bad fucking friend.

taking naps are okay and not lazy. it means you’re listening to what your body needs, and if your body says it’s tired during the day, you nap.

it’s okay to not have friends all the time. there are periods of time where you may just have to rely on yourself, and that’s okay.

big friend groups are the absolute worst and no one will ever truly know each other in big groups.

dont shit on people for having what you consider “mediocre jobs”. if they weren’t working, you wouldn’t be able to get your damn happy meal, or get your fucking groceries. so don’t complain about that shit.

everyone should see a therapist at some point in their life.

just because someone has some expensive things in their house, it doesn’t make them rich. you have no idea if they saved money up for years just to get those things.

dont comment on other peoples living conditions and whether they’re poor or rich or in the middle.

we should be able to do a lot more with ourselves without getting judgement (tattoos, hair styles, piercings, clothing styles). as far as we know, we only have this one life, so why should we waste it. and if you personally dont wanna do something like that, dont waste your life fucking judging other people for wanting to do it.

stars should get more attention.

as you can see i have a lot of hot takes. if i have more i’ll add to this lmao

[autistic--rory-blog]

writing autistic characters

a lot of people ask me about writing autistic characters and specifically nonverbal ones so heres some tips

avoid functioning labels. high/low functioning are harmful labels and are used to silence autistics. high functioning is used to say that “you arent autistic enough to have a say” and low functioning is used to say that “you cant think for yourself”

aspergers is the same as autism. it is usually used as another way to say “high functioning” but autism is autism. some people do identify with the asperger/aspie label more then autism and thats ok as long as they arent using it for aspie supremacy stuff (thinking aspies are better then the “other” autistics or using that label to not be associated with autistic people)

being nonverbal and stimming are not the only traits. there is a massive range of traits autistic people can have. look at atypical traits for good long lists that arent just the stereotypical traits

not everyone is a savant or is really good at maths. i honestly dont know any autistic savants and i only know a few people who are exremely good at maths. there are a lot of autistic people who were considered “gifted” at school and if you want to look into that research twice exceptional. but i also know a lot of autistic people who arent good at school at all

we do not “suffer” from autism. yes there are some autistic traits that suck but that doesnt mean we suffer from it. “autistic person” is most commonly prefered but some do prefer “person with autism” or not have a preference

autistic people are born autistic. we do not “develop” autism at any age. we are born that way but might not show it obviously until later on. diagnosis doesnt change who we are either. were still the same person just with a label for things now

not understanding anything. this is one that is commonly applied to nonverbal people but we really do understand what your saying even if we dont always show it. 

lack of feelings/emotions. another one commonly applied to nonverbal people but can also be used for verbal ones. we all have feelings but it can be hard to show them. it can also be hard to identify which emotion you are feeling (alexithymia)

autism is not a illness. autism is a developmental disability or neurodevelopmental disorder

avoid mental ages. this is one that almost every noverbal person has had as a label. it is extremely ableist and not good. someone does not have the mind of an “x” year old. they are the age they are but with a developmental disorder or intellectual disability (or both) or whatever else

avoid aba unless it is specifically said that its a bad thing. aba  is abuse and torture and causes massive amounts of trauma. it is not a good thing

stimming and infodumping is a good thing. stimming is our way to regulate our emotions and help our sensory issues (but it can have no reason and thats fine) and without it we can have destructive behaviours. infodumping is a good part of having special interests (another good thing) and treating it as a bad thing is not good

being nonverbal isnt a bad thing. it took me a long time to accept that i am nonverbal so you can have internal badness or whatever but other people should not see being nonverbal as a bad thing (whether temporarily or not)

young white nonverbal people are not the only autistics. literally anyone can be autistic. that means people from every culture from every race from every gender from every sexuality from every age

nonverbal people dont communicate. even if people dont use aac they still communicate with their behaviours. and there are so many forms of aac as well that a lot of nonverbal people do end up communicating with one but if they dont then thats fine to

we all have no empathy. almost all of the autistic people i know have really high empathy even though i have almost none. also adding on to this were not all rude and mean to everyone like some media shows. ive never met any autistic person like that (but unfortunately they do exist) so please dont write that because it just pushes the stereotype further