#the account™️ is back

[boundinparchment]

the absolute rant and essay I would write about how we gotta stop with treating fandom artists and writers and crafters like influencers and content creators. how we expect engagement out of people doing things for fun in their free time and for no monetary exchange. about how social media for fandom was a questionable choice. how we lost “ship and let ship” and boil everything nuanced down into “good” and “bad” and equate a person’s moral and ethics based on their character preference and ships. how “even you are not immune to propaganda” also applies to the loss of nuance and the way we interact and place boundaries and re-define words in a way that is outside of their intention. how we demand censorship because we don’t know the use of the back button.

but without specifically saying it was better back in the day because this shit was always happening but damn was it easier to avert your eyes.

but alas I am a humble fanfic writer who has only so many words and I’d rather spend them on my stories

[groundbreakingdot872]

think being mooted is a lot like being knighted :)

[tunglrsillyman]

imagine creating a presentation for a company that distributes college textbooks and you linked a youtube video to accompany the topic in that presentation but you pasted a whole link to your personal playlist that leads to your personal account with your subscriptions and playlists public AND ONE OF THOSE IS SUBSCRIBING TO A CONSPIRACY CHANNEL, A MEDITATIVE PLAYLIST FULL OF CHARKA CLEANSING VIDEOS AND nothing else other than a couple misplaced videos in a lot of your playlists but holy hell its such an interesting look for a presenter that has a doctorate believe that type of nonsense

[tending-the-hearth]

thinking about how canonically the pevensie siblings are 13, 12, 10, and 8 in "the lion, the witch, and the wardrobe"

thinking about how lucy needed a stool to be able to get up onto her throne, how peter's sword is a little too large for him, how susan's bow is a little too difficult for her to pull back, how edmund's shield nearly covers his entire body.

thinking about the pevensie siblings and their first few months in narnia, getting to know their new people, and half the narnians sitting there horrified because WHAT have these literal babies been through to give them such traumatized, old eyes, and the other half of the narnians are preparing to adopt them, no it doesn't matter that they're the rules, they're children who are being put in charge of too many things, and if peter looks at the old man council long enough he's going to cry, so someone needs to give him paternal support while aslan is off doing Lion Jesus Stuff™️ and whoops oreius is being nice and encouraging and now he's adopted his kings and queens they're his kids now he doesn't make the rules.

just the narnians and the pevensies being thrown into it together, and just as the pevensies will do anything to protect their new kingdom, the narnians will do anything to protect their rules, because let's be honest, these children have no sense of self-preservation, and are far too overprotective of each other and their people to take into account their own safety, so a lot of battles it's just one of the pevensie siblings running headfirst into danger with oreius running after them because his kids are feral and don't know proper royalty manners and won't threatening old kings from different countries because they're being assholes and the last time one of them tried undermining the queens susan called him a self-righteous asshole and lucy tried to stab him SOMEONE help him corral his children please

[lobautumny]

Alright, guess this toy's gonna talk about Palworld, because it's seen Discourse™️ start to crop up about how "supporting the game is immoral because it's stealing designs from Pokemon!"

Now look, this toy's not about to sit here and tell you that all of the monster designs in Palworld are completely original and the game isn't, on some level, a bootleg. Obviously a lot of the designs are bootleg pokemon. That's not the point it wants to get at. The point is that it doesn't really matter.

First of all, nobody is being hurt by Palworld having knockoff pokemon among the ranks of its monsters. Game Freak is not some tiny indie developer struggling to make ends meet having their work unfairly co-opted by a big, bad corporation. Pokemon is, in fact, the largest, most profitable media franchise of all time, and Palworld is an indie game. The reason that something like this would hypothetically be scummy/shitty is if someone were taking someone else's work, changing it slightly, claiming it as their own, and thus depriving the original creator of credit/visibility that they should've had. But that literally can't happen here, because everyone already knows what Pokemon is. So unless it gets found that they're stealing designs from fakemon artists or something (there was one alleged instance, but it seems to have just been a coincidence of two different people having the idea of "what if Chimecho but with big, bulky arms?"), Palworld is hurting nobody through having bootleg designs, so the moral argument against the game falls flat.

With that out of the way, there's a much more interesting topic to discuss here: Why is it that when someone's fangame gets C&D'd, everyone immediately jumps to the creator's support, accurately assessing that our copyright system is broken and primarily serves to hurt independent artists, but the moment a developer makes the changes necessary to make sure their fangame doesn't get hit with a C&D (and to allow them to make money off of it), it's suddenly bad and cringe and unoriginal?

The argument that "Palworld is lazy and unoriginal and therefore bad because the monster designs are too similar to Pokemon's designs" is something that this toy would be willing to hear out if Palworld were a turn-based singles-format RPG with similar systems/overall structure to those found in Pokemon games, but, uh. It isn't. It's a third-person shooter with monster-catching mechanics and, like, Factorio-ass automation and base-building, from what this toy can tell. And it doesn't know if the game is good, as someone who has not played it (or even really seen gameplay of it), but it can absolutely tell you that the game's not lazy.

Sure, they could have done more to make the monster designs feel more unique, and that's absolutely a valid criticism for the game. This toy doesn't want to come across like it's saying otherwise. It just wants people to recognize that that's kind of a nitpick when the game is, on a mechanical and genre level, something completely different from anything any Pokemon game ever has been or ever will be, and that nobody would be complaining about laziness or a lack of originality if this came out as a fangame literally just using actual pokemon. In that reality, people would've been popping off at how high-effort it is, actually. And like, even putting money aside, this game literally could not exist as a fangame. A while back, someone uploaded some videos on Youtube showcasing a fangame they were developing that was an FPS where the enemies were pokemon. They got hit with a C&D and their Youtube account was terminated within a couple days of the videos being uploaded. The game was not monetized, and in fact, never even had a download link, to this toy's recollection. Palworld would have suffered the same exact fate if it wasn't its own IP.

[leonistic]

hidden in the shadows || jamil viper

"you should dance with him," you heard malleus whisper gently as you watched jamil dance with one of the noble ladies at the masquerade, focused on 'not tarnishing the honour of the asim family'. "he does not have the heart to ask you to dance, for he fears you would choose someone else over him."

"i don't know," you murmur as you shuffle awkwardly, eyes still focused on jamil. "i mean, i'm scared he'd choose somebody else too. i'm not all that great."

"and yet, there is no one i know in all my years, nor in lilia's, who has seen 6 overblots and lived to tell the tale. i believe that there is much in you that you refuse to acknowledge, friend."

"and now!" an announcement screams behind you, startling both you and malleus, and the two of you look at each other and laugh silently. "ladies and gentlemen, those of you who haven't received a dance, the time is nigh! ask anybody on the floor to dance with you! rest assured that they shall not refuse you!"

"i believe it is a sign," is all malleus said as he walked towards the buffet, clearly intent on getting himself something to eat without you. you sigh as you give yourself a quick pep talk and walk towards jamil, the latter ending his conversation with the overly touchy lady™️. jamil looks towards you and smiles softly before politely cutting the touchy lady™️ short, which she clearly didn't like.

"i saw you watching me," he whispers as he accepts your silent invitation to dance, leading you to the dance floor where the stars twinkled above the glass ceiling, the moon light gently lighting up your face. "why?"

"you look gorgeous dressed like this," you whisper back, unsure of what to say, but convinced that you have to be honest. "couldn't take my eyes off of you even if i wanted to, to be honest."

"well," jamil starts softly, face coming closer to yours as you squeezed your eyes shut. "you look irresistible in this suit of yours."

as you opened your eyes and smiled, a tap on the mic startled you back to the dance floor, the announcer announcing the midnight kiss, which brought good luck to the couples and their dearest friends. jamil flushed and looked away, and while you looked straight at him, you were sure you were making the same face.

"i'll leave you to choose who to kiss, i suppose," jamil murmurs as he slowly halts, clearly intent on moving away from you, and his dismissal broke your heart.

"but i want to kiss you," you start before he can walk too far, too far from your grasp, and you're hopeful that he reciprocates when he turns around and runs back to you and kisses you, and you note the smallest things that you observed about him are so different once you're this close to him- his lips are chapped but somehow still soft, and his calloused hands hold you so gently, and his breath is warm, and smells like the chutney he must have eaten sometime back. your hands are clammy, and so are his- but there's really no other place you'd rather be.

requested by @.inkybloom-luv on my old-old account lmao. reposting it again because i really like this :33

[pursuitseternal]

“The Third Day” in “Antics of the Newly Ascended:” just sweet smut, rough smut, and Batstarion 🦇🔥

Ascended Astarion x F!Reader | E | 2K 🔥smut

Thank you @zyana-wyvern for the sexy staring screenshot 💞

Summary: A night spent drinking in the tavern below lands you back in your room, belly aching from the wine, other part of you aching for… him. Only you find yourself alone, alone except for a small presence that might just be watching you enjoying your alone time.

CW: female masturbation, fingering, fluffy bat forms, More Chin Scritching™️, getting folded in half and f*cked senseless.

First day | Second day | Ao3 link

🦇🔥🦇🔥🦇🔥🦇🔥🦇🔥🦇🔥🦇🔥🦇🔥🦇

Your head is swimming, your feet stumbling as you climb back up the stairs to your rooms at the Elfsong. You tug at your dress, breathing heavy, wine-laden pants as you poke your head into the common rooms. “Is he… hiccup… back yet?”

“His lordship?” Shadowheart rolls her eyes. “Yes, he’s… somewhere, though he was not quite so equally in his cups as you are, it seems.”

She crosses her arms and throws you that sharp look of judgment.

But your belly is too light with wine to really care. You wave, slurring a goodnight, heading back to your rooms. Of course, it had been a quiet night. One more night of drinking down in the tavern before another grueling day of fighting and gathering allies and being heroes. The wine had been sweet, not quite the same as before you were turned, but still good to your tongue. And now, you had a silly smile on your face and a warmth in your belly only he could satisfy. You push the door open to your private room, craving that tingle of his powerful presence. But you find it dark.

Empty.

But you can feel, sense him, close by. You most likely don’t have long to wait, you think to yourself, settling on the edge of the bed, starting to slink your gown from your shoulders. You shimmy it off, letting your skin finally breathe from under all that fine silk.

Your whole body thrums, just hunger and need. A drive to be sated and filled. Where could he be… you bite your lip, feeling your arousal only growing stronger with his scent in the room now. This must be what it is to be in heat for beasts, to have a need to be fucked only quenched with fulfillment. If only he was here…

Eyes closing, your hand brushes up your own thigh, body shaking as you slide yourself back into the bed. Hands wandering over your belly, your thighs, you let yourself explore this new form. It’s so similar, perhaps brawnier, lean and wiry just like him. To your own touch, your flesh isn’t cold, hard and defined, but not chilling or undead.

Yet, you are equally wet between your thighs at the thought of waiting for his return. What’s the harm, you wonder, letting a single finger reach between your folds to sweep that slick over your clit and rub.

Lighting races down your spine, your body shivers so hard, your fang bites your lower lip in its grasp.

You can smell him, feel his presence near. Close, but not close enough. Drawing near but still not with you. Not inside you. The thought alone makes you tremble more, imagining that slide of his cock inside you, filling you with the memory of its delicious drag and the ghost of its pressure.

A panting moan rises from between your grit fangs. What’s the harm… you’re alone after all.

Heat quickly wraps at the base of your spine, tremors rocking your insides slowly, fire flooding your belly.

So close, so close now. You chase your orgasm with reckless abandon, barely feeling the rush of beating air above you, hardly hearing the woosh of leather wings flapping near your face.

“My, my,” his voice caresses in your ear, right in your ear. Lips rubbing against its curves. “Who knew you had so much arousal within you tonight…”

You shudder at his voice, almost still from the sensation of just his breath, his sound.

“Oh, don’t you dare stop on my account, my treasure…” you feel him settle on the bed beside you, one arm reaching over your shoulders, as your eyes fly open to look into his face.

Hunger—unabashed, unsatisfied hunger incarnate.

“Where…?”

The question doesn’t leave your mouth, not when he softly claps a palm over it. “Ah, ah,” he chides you, “I would feel just awful if you didn’t finish what you started before I so rudely joined you…”

“Then politely join me, my love,” you whisper against his mind, an easy feat to do while he hangs over you, peering with those dark red eyes.

His lips slide into a deeper smirk, his other hand sweeps quickly to join yours, barely catching your fingers as his fingers dive deep between your walls.

You groan, muffled beneath his palm, your nose working extra to catch your breath. Your body thrums and throbs, his fingers pumping in and out, crooking to catch that spot inside you he alone knows of and worships.

It’s too great, the pressure and the pleasure, and then he slides a third finger inside you.

Crying, you shatter, tears of bliss seep from your eyes as they shut, closed tightly as ecstacy wracks your body. Wave after wave, your orgasm consumes you, his fingers still drawing inside, giving your cunt something wonderful to clench around.

At last, your eyes drift open, meeting his own glassy gaze of desire. He seems flushed, aroused. Eager. As if he has been watching and waiting for…

You look at the ceiling above the bed, catching sight of little scratching claw marks that weren’t there. Your mind recalls that soft beating flutter.

“Astarion,” you whisper, dragging his hand from your mouth first to hold it in your own clasp, “I could have sworn I felt you… smelled you… before you just appeared out of nowhere.”

“Ah,” he purrs, so pleased with himself in that single syllable, “you need a demonstration,” he grins, oozing pride. Before your eyes, a mist swirls as you feel him shrink above you. That bat replaces his form, flapping its wings and flipping in a circle a few times before landing on your belly.

You gasp at the contact. Fuzzy and scratching, little claws and softer spots of fur sending ripples of sensation through you.

Then another burst of mist, and he’s suddenly crushing you. Long legs already spread your knees apart, arms braced on either side of your head. His fangs flash in the dim light, so arrogant and proud of his abilities. “I thought I would give you a bit of a surprise tonight, once you returned. Little did I know my little love would be far too eager to wait for even her dearest little fluffy pet to materialize before getting right… into it.”

You raise a finger, sliding it down the ridge of his pointed ear. Its sensitivity instantly makes him shiver on top of you. Crimson eyes flutter shut, mouth pulled apart in pure arousal. But you keep that touch traveling down the cut of his jaw, drawing to a halt only to scritch under his chin.

You feel his cock twitch on your belly, increasingly more erratic and harder the longer you caress him there.

“I do rather like that, you know,” he offers gently. “Two-hundred years of being touched, and no one… no one touched me like that.”

“That’s because no one got the pleasure of petting the Vampire Ascendant in his remarkable transformed form before,” you grin, your fingers raising to continue their gentle scratches in his soft and unruly locks.

“Mmm I do like the sound of that, my treasure,” he purrs, leaning against your touch, eyes still closed to savor the sweet little caresses you make across his skin, through his hair. “Perhaps I could return the favor? Perhaps you have a little itch that needs… scratching?”

“Gods,” you mewl, bucking your hips for any more friction in your folds. He only chuckles as you do it again, your fingers clawing into the back of his neck. But he slides from your hold to grab your knees. His hands fold you into yourself, legs draping over his shoulder, opening yourself up wide and plentiful for his taking. A growl in his throat, Astarion sheathes himself inside you in one, quick and brutal thrust.

The noise you make bounces off that bat-scratched ceiling.

“Better?” he taunts above you, hands at the backs of your thighs as he slowly glides in and out. A rough beginning followed by a slow undulation as he takes you.

You can’t even lift your head, can’t catch a full breath with how he has you bent for his pleasure. But it feels so… divine. Every slick thrust squelches as he takes his time. You try to keep your gaze fixed into his, watching how he drinks in the sight of you, tongue licking his lip, muscles of his shoulder and chest clenching as he fights to keep control of himself.

You open your mouth, letting moan after moan pierce the wet-slapping quiet. You want to make him undone by your sounds alone. Holding nothing back, you make little noises of pleasure with each thrust, feeling that control slipping away as he slides into you faster. “So good,” you keen, his rolling hips now slamming into you. “I want more, my love…”

That… that snaps something inside him, nails biting into the soft flesh of your thighs, languorous thrusts turn to pummel after pummel that smack hard at the end of your channel.

You squirm, almost unsure if you can take it, but you can’t think either, hesitation quickly swallowed by the flashing heat of your climax. Your hands clench into the bedding, senseless noises rip from your throat, until you scream his name.

“Just as cute and ferocious, aren’t you?” he growls, pushing his cock through the clenching waves of your climax, his own thighs washed in the gush of your arousal. “Who’s… chittering… now, my pet?”

His words come out stilted, sputtered and forced between his gritted teeth as you feel him hitching. Hips bucking wildly and hard against your ass as he groans. Seed spurts inside you, leaking from your slit so packed with his cock. A few more thrusts and he stills, a slack jawed, satisfied smirk on his full lips. He grins so wide, you stare at his glinting fangs.

“Have I…” you pant, groaning as his hands ease your legs back down to the bedcovers, “…earned my own chin scratches?”

“Maybe…” he purrs back, sliding his body in the bed, pulling yours to fit snugly against his side. “There is a high standard of what warrants such a reward, I’m sure…”

“Not for you,” you tease, running a single finger along his jawline, tapping your fingertip on the prominent point of his nose.

“Yes, but I am Vampire Ascendant. We can’t be giving out my special reward to everyone, now can we?”

Your hand fists, slamming a punch into his shoulder that makes him feign a whine. “Oww,” he dramatically whimpers, his face suddenly twists into that look of feral, untamed lust. “Oh wait, as a mighty vampire lord now, I can also shrug off blows like they’re nothing, you should know that, my consort…”

You move with preternatural speed to climb on top of him, to grip both hands on his chest and smirk down at him. “I want my rewards,” you tease, letting your head wag to show off your chin.

He easily slips his arms from under your hold. Fingers claw around your neck, just enough grip to tighten your breath. He pulls you quick to his conceited grinning lips. Sucking your lips, those warm little licks of his mouth work his magic on your whole body. You feel it through the haze of need he stokes with his kiss, just the barest little tickles of his fingers under your chin.

It warms something inside you, that dexterous touch caressing that secret little soft spot under your chin. And then you feel his kiss sweep to the side of your neck, fangs grazing you with those little razor points. “One rewarding turn deserves another, wouldn’t you agree?” he purrs beneath your ear.

And you nod, the smallest permission taken to its fullest as he bites and drinks.

With one last stroke of his thumb under your chin to thank you.

[qqueenofhades]

I completely understand if you don’t feel comfortable answering this, but my mind is spiraling out of control and you’re the only person I know with the level of knowledge to where I can feel comfortable asking this without getting some form of “bla bla we live in a safe state don’t worry.”

I’m sincerely wondering if I need to be making plans to leave the country in the event of November bringing the most horrible of outcomes despite our best efforts (and yes I’m planning to vote blue in everything I can); as a AFAB in CA?

I know about project 2025. I’m terrified. Forgive my pop culture reference, but I feel like a version of Princess Zelda staring down a barrel of possible doom while everyone around me is like “nah that future you literally had a nightmare about where they made it illegal for a woman to have a bank account without a guy co-signing it and took the money from everyone who didn’t comply by a certain date isn’t even a possibility!”

I’m just confused about my life and am trying to take it day by day, and exercising every right while I still have it to prevent this outcome, but it feels weird making plans and retirement accounts and just general Setting Up Adult Life And Future Things™️……while wondering if I even have a future in this place at all and I’m just making it harder to escape if need be.

I’m sorry I’m rambling, and I guess I don’t know what I’m asking since no one has a crystal ball.

But I guess, it’s stuff like how much can the feds effect state’s policies? Is it possible for them to immediately block international travel for all women practically upon inauguration? How much time would I even have to gtfo if the worst begins?

Bc honestly this whole thing feels like the lead in to a very nasty chapter of a history book, and even though I have hope we’ll have another blue tsunami, it can be hard to try and figure things out when it feels like there’s barely any historical precedent for any of it.

Welp. Okay. First of all, I am giving you a comforting hug, I am walking with you to your favorite coffee shop, I am paying for your favorite beverage and also a baked goodie of your choice, and we are sitting down in a corner where we can talk honestly. So that's where I want you to imagine us having this conversation.

To start with, yes, I completely understand this feeling of utter, paralyzing doom, where I am trying to go about my daily life and make plans for my career and carry out daily tasks and Be Responsible while there's still just this total void beyond the end of the year, the utter impossibility of knowing if we will have dodged an absolutely massive bullet and finally be safe (since if Trump loses again he is 100% going to jail in the next four years) or, well. You know. That is a very hard way to live, when you're wondering if anything is going to matter and you can't see beyond that black cloud of fear on the horizon. It sucks you down and tells you that nothing is worth doing now in case it just gets so much worse. I am not going to tell you not to feel that. We all do. We are all scared. That in and of itself is a perfectly normal way to feel.

However, there are things you can do both now and if (I repeat, if) God absolutely forbid, the worst was to happen (again). First of all, we have already lived through a Trump presidency once. It was terrible and scary and awful and demoralizing as fuck, but we can do it again if we absolutely Goddamn fucking have to (once, again, God forbid). Second, you are currently about as safe as you could be in California. Newsom has proven himself to be smart, tough, able to run rings around Republicans, and unwilling to comply with their stupid performative-cruelty directives. He's not a saint or a magician, but you don't need that; you need a shrewd politician able to fight back, and he has proven himself willing and capable of doing that. So as long as he is governor, you're going to be more safe than not, and I'd also like to ask all the shrieking Online Leftists if, should the shit go down, they would rather live in a state with a Democratic governor who will fight Trump 2.0 every step of the way, or a Republican governor who will just roll over and obey. (But that would destroy their BOTH PARTIES ARE THE SAME talking point, so you know.)

Next of all, even if the Republicans are doing their best impression, America in 2024 isn't Germany in 1934. There are different tools, different ways to fight back, and different awarenesses/social media/visibility factors. I also need everyone to remember that just as Biden can't just sign an executive order and fix everything everywhere, Trump can't just sign an executive order and fuck everything everywhere, just like that with no more discussion ever. He tried that last time, it generally didn't work, and trust me, at least this time nobody is sleeping on the danger he poses. His candidacy in 2016 was dismissed as a long-shot joke that nobody took seriously until it was too late, and for better or worse, people aren't doing that this time. He will be sued instantly, incredibly, and repeatedly with everything his band of wannabe fascists try, and since we have had four years of Biden fixing the courts from where Trump trashed them, that does mean something. There is no scenario where even if he does issue some outrageous order against women, LGBTQ+ people, immigrants, etc (which to be clear, I'm sure he would try) it would just be carried out completely, immediately, and with no feasible way to stop it. Evil is evil, but it is also stupid, clueless, determined to hurt people just for the hell of it without any regard for what is possible or which will be allowed, and there's a lot more grey area in there than just "Trump says something terrible and it's instantly done, the end."

Once again, I'm not going to say that the worst-case scenario is not possible, but I don't think it's likely, and even if that does happen, there are ways for us to survive and fight back (again). Nobody wants it and it should not have to be asked of us due to the utter collapse of the social, civic, political, and intellectual fabric of this country thanks to the TrumpCult, but once again... these people are so loud and dangerous and cruel and stupid because they are in the minority. Etc. etc. polls are garbage, but we did just have an interesting piece of empirical data from the Iowa caucuses. Trump -- in one of the whitest, most rural, most conservative, most religious, most Trump-loving states in the country -- struggled to break 50%. Almost half of a rabid Republican fully-Trumpized electorate, among the diehards sufficiently motivated to get out and caucus in extreme freezing weather, voted for someone else (Haley and DeSantis took about 20% apiece). Now, no, we don't know how that will translate to the general election, and if registered Republicans will flock back to the nominee even if it's Trump, but as almost half of Haley voters said they would vote for Biden if it was a Biden-Trump matchup in the general, there is some sense that Trump is an aberration to their otherwise ironclad party loyalty. Now, Republicans are the fucking worst and nobody should be relying on them to save us; we still need to get out and vote for Democrats with all our might. But Trump is no longer barn-burningly popular even in core Trump heartland, and it'll be interesting to see how things go in future primaries.

My point is: I know the feeling that evil is awful and unstoppable and all-powerful, and will crush our lives and our futures no matter what we do to resist it. I really, really do. But Trump is a terrible candidate, he's running literally only to keep himself out of a long, long prison sentence, and if he had crushed the Iowa caucuses regardless, we might be having a different conversation. However, we need to remember that it is possible, again (God forbid) in the worst scenario, to resist, to live, and to win. Everyone who is motivated to work for a better world will still be here. Everyone who can help you and all of us will still be here. And there are more of us than there are of them. Yes, I do understand the feeling that we need to have contingency plans in place, I do absolutely know that it could get very bad, and all that (as you say, nobody has a crystal ball). But for now, I want you to take a deep breath, try to take this day by day, and remember that this is not a crushing and inevitable future that will sweep over you and destroy you without you (or any other person of good will) having a say in the matter. You still have agency, you still have the ability to protect yourself, and you still have others who will protect you in turn. You're not alone. The bad guys want you to think that, because when you're isolated and terrorized, you're easier to pick off and/or recruit into their cult. But you're not.

In conclusion: "What are we holding onto, Sam?"

[ccuunnttbbooyyss]

The Resort (Part 1)

THIS IS AN URGENT ANNOUNCEMENT TO ALL THOSE IN THE [REDACTED] & [REDACTED] AREAS

Hello,

It has come to our attention that an unfortunate accident at one of our chemical treatment plans has occurred on the [REDACTED]st of [REDACTED] 2023, resulting in the contamination of the water supply in the above mentioned areas for a period of approximately 3 hours and 10 minutes.

A statement has been issued to water providers by The Company™️ and a number of anti-transformative chemicals have been released to counteract the imbalance.

However, the damage has been done and we wish to report on it as such.

As you may know, some of the affected water infiltrated the [REDACTED] Beach Resort where it unwittingly transformed multiple male patrons into what is colloquially referred to as "Cuntboys". IE- Men with a fully functional vagina, uterus, ovaries, etc. Others not as diligently exposed to the chemicals did not experience full "Cuntboy-ification" as it has been deemed.

This transformation is reported to have first occurred with a sudden and dramatic increase in the size of the lower extremities, glutes, lower back muscles and an initial reduction in penis and testicle size.

This reportedly occurred throughout the premises, including the pool's filtration system, the resort's water system (showers, baths, commercial water taps), and available on-tap drinking water.

The following changes consisted of what we are dubbing a "hyper-fertile cycle" where the excess chemical exposure was processed into a mixture of testosterone, dopamine and oxytocin. This resulted in a dramatically increased libido.

Fortunately the spread of the affected was contained within the resort and secondary exposure (either through sexual fluids or otherwise) was rendered ineffectual as the transformative chemicals were able to penetrate the skin barrier in less than 0.2 microseconds). This resulted in numerous impregnations or otherwise sexual encounters in and around the location, of which have been documented.

We encourage all those affected either through direct exposure or through coupling and secondary exposure to report to one of our branches to undergo a full physical exam and analysis.

We also encourage all currently, or presumed to be, pregnant to not terminate the pregnancy as we wish to ascertain valuable research data on the growth of the foetus within this timeframe.

We hope to reveal more information to the public as it becomes known.

Regards,

The Company.

~~~

You smirk as the commercial comes to an end, the broadcaster for the local news station thanking The Company for their transparency regarding the situation and continuing with more news on the recent baby boom caused through the accident.

You couldn't pay attention for long though, not as the hot little cuntboy you picked up from the resort was busy swallowing every inch of your enhanced cock down his throat.

You fisted his hair, shoving him down to push his nose in your pubes, loving how his throat spasmed around your dick and the gurgling sound that came out of his tight throat.

"You hear that baby, they wanna give you a checkup."

A soft whimper comes out as the only response. He looks up at you, tear-filled baby blues staring into yours. He's been working your cock for hours, thoroughly content with kneeling between your spread thighs and swallowing every enhanced load you can give.

"Yeah I know you're pregnant. They just wanna make sure you can give me a while lot more."

A more pleased sound comes out as he resumes his enthusiastic sucking. You're sure that's his fifth load in as many hours.

You sigh as the hot cum shoots up your rock hard dick. You might as well put off that appointment till tomorrow...

Story in collaboration with @maleagetransformation , Part 2 over on his account!

[babydollmarauders]

MEDIA MANAGEMENT — NJ DEVILS

notes: inspired by bestie Kaylin’s ( @starsandhughes ) penalty box series, i’m starting a new insta edit series!

summary: y/n is the NJ Devils social media manager but she also loves posting on her personal account after every game!

notes: this was supposed to be posted last night but tumblr hates me and wasn’t letting me post. so for the sake of the timeline, we’re pretending it was posted last night.

y/ndevils00

liked by njdevils, nicohischier, and 12,624 others

y/ndevils00 🚨🚨 BRATT TRICK ALERT 🚨🚨

tonight my very best friend on this team (sorry nico), the man, the myth, the brattman got his very first career hat trick and i couldn’t be prouder!! i mean, look at that smiley face! so very well deserved!

on the other hand, maraschino cherry got a penalty tonight for high sticking. never fret, i reprimanded him and he’s assured me that he will never ever ever do it again because that’s bad boy behavior!

see also: hershey kiss looking very smug after his goal; rowdy looking dashing during warmups (he definitely didn’t pay me to say this); and nolan getting his well deserved praise from the other ones™️

CONGRATS ON THE WIN BOYS! YOU FINALLY DID IT!

tagged jesperbratt, nicohischier, john.marino97, jackhughes, nolanfoote and njdevils

jesperbratt thank you y/n 😆

y/ndevils00 of course, my munchkin!

user3 the random jack picture in with the game pics💀 she’s feeding the rumors

nicohischier HE’S your best friend? i’ll remember that next time i stop at chipotle before going to the arena

y/ndevils00 hey now! don’t bring the chipotle into this! if it’s any consolation you’re my favorite captain 🫶

nicohischier i’m the only captain?

y/ndevils00 and you do it so well

john.marino97 did you just call me a cherry?

john.marino97 also i want everyone to know that y/n’s version of reprimanding me was spraying me in the face with water

y/ndevils00 and it worked didn’t it? you went back out there and didn’t get any more penalties in the third period. i’ll make a great mother one day

john.marino97 dear god please don’t ever reproduce

jackhughes did you just imply that i paid you to compliment me? that’s such a lie!

y/ndevils00 the $5 burning a hole in my pocket says otherwise! thank you for contributing to y/n’s rent fund!

dougieham @/y/ndevils00 he makes you pay rent?

user73 who’s he?!

dawson1417 hughesy got a slide but i didn’t?!

y/ndevils00 i like him more than you <3

dawson1417 what if i paid you $20?

y/ndevils00 …so i was thinking of giving you your own post

njdevils our boys were FIRE tonight! 🔥

y/ndevils00 well- they were kinda sloppy in the first half

nicohischier did you just use the devils page to comment on your own post just so you could attack us?

y/ndevils00 @/nicohischier i would never do such a thing! where are these accusations coming from?!

[ghosts-and-glory]

In your Modern/YouTube Cotl au, does Narinder still have his own channel after him and the Lamb get together or has he moved over to the Lamb's channel fully and retire/delete his old one? What kinda stuff does he do now?

YouTube will not give this cat back his channel and is still cracking down on his alt accounts. (The price of doxxing your entire family) He’s probably been reduced to a side character on The Lamb’s channel. I also think it would be funny if The Lamb got all five siblings together for a nightmare podcast, it’s giving frienemies.

Narinder post YouTube clout definitely works at a smoke shop, I don’t make the rules, I only interpret the vibes™️

[classic-callahan]

it’s so small and like ultimately insignificant but imo one of the most underrated glimpses of arthur’s natural leadership in the heat of the moment/when he’s not under Dutch’s thumb is this moment during the siege on shady belle when he gets into position after smashing the shit out of the window and immediately calls out “is everyone accounted for?”

and john’s like “idk, i think!” and Arthur I-Am-Not-Fucking-Around-Right-Now Morgan shoots back with “HEY! I said, is everyone accounted for???” shortly before running through the gunfire to get to sadie, like i just know he gave john a Talking To™️ later that night

[samheughanswife]

Celeb-Adjacent Influencers.

WTAF fever dream is going on? Seriously.

There is a collective group think rushing into histrionic personality disorder, which is an overwhelming desire to be noticed - Sarah Holden, and all the tumblrina stakeholders in the never ending 🌀 into the desperate struggle to remain relevant in a void of NADA.

The speculation, is Sam fucking Sarah casually or in a deeper relationship?

Is this where it’s all at? The very clear evidence that Sam has not been linked to woman for so long has the dueling accounts grasping at the most laughable links, case in point ancient history references- Nobu girl. I mean lame and stale are understatements.

In a void of substantive evidence of a relationship 😂😂😂 I can’t believe I’m using this descriptive, the asinine (her ass) cobbling together of SM online times and gym attendance are the evidence of love in a time of Hydroxy™️???!!

The facts are that while Sam was travelling in 🇺🇸 and 🇦🇺 there was no murmur of him bumping curlies with any gym blondes, or other celeb-adjacent blondes, brunettes NADA. No anon drops. No evidence collected from trawling You Tube. NADA. The 🤺 accounts got NADA.

Now back in 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿 crazy is 🌀

[agirlcandream84]

Where There Is Light | Frank Castle x Reader

My first Frank Castle fic, which was a long time coming. It's... angsty which is sorta My Whole Deal ™️ but it's also pretty goddamn hot. Want to shout out @chvoswxtch whose Frank content is literal perfection and who single handedly made me fall in love with the character.

Summary: Frank returns from a trip to discover his worst nightmare, or so he thinks. Anger quickly turns to angst as Frank is confronted with his vulnerabilities head-on.

Frank Castle x Reader

Word Count: 2k

Warnings: 18+, Minors DNI. Explicit content. Fingering, P in V, slight praise kink, angst

"Alright, stop," you mumble, hearing enough.

"And do you know how easy it was for me to fucking waltz in here," he continues, his voice at a shout, ignoring your quiet plea.

"Frank stop," you beg a little louder, meeting his eye this time.

"That coulda been anybody who wanted to get in here," he rages on, undeterred.

"STOP!" you scream, even surprising yourself, "...please Frank...stop" the last words a more timid mumble, tears starting to spill at the corners of your eyes.

And this time he does. His posture frozen for a moment before snapping back to himself and his touch tender as he reaches for you.

"Hey, hey, sweetheart. It's alright," he says as he engulfs you in his arms. "I ain't gonna hurt ya. Ssh sh sh," he shushes you, as his calloused hand runs over the back of your head, your face pressed into his broad chest as you take slow breaths to calm your frayed nerves. "I do it cuz--" he starts but you stop him.

"I know why you do it," you interrupt, not making him say the names of the ones he lost. The truth was, you felt horribly guilty. He was right-- you were careless. And now wasn't a great time to be careless. Frank was away for a few days and you'd been so good about being vigilant without him but it was exhausting. Checking every blind spot. Jamming the door every night. Only running errands in daylight. No headphones--ever. You were Castle's girl and the wrong people knew it.

You wanted a normal moment. One normal moment. You opened the bay window in the living room to let in the late summer breeze and laid on the cool wood floor and listened to an album in the patch of sun like a cat. Freshly showered, a cold iced tea nearby, the moment felt nearly criminal. And it may as well have been.

Frank returned home after six long days and broke into a sprint the moment he saw the curtain blowing in the breeze, assuming a break-in. He climbed the fire escape, his heart hammering in his chest expecting to find his life destroyed for the second time. And instead he saw you, his cat in her patch of sun, and it would have been a goddamn beautiful sight if he hadn't thought you were likely to have been mutilated and dead instead. And all that anger had to go somewhere.

"I'm sorry," you murmur into his chest. "I was careless," you admit.

"Sweetheart I--" he starts but stops, his chin perched on the top of your head. "I know this probably isn't the life you imagined for yourself. And I, uh, I know it's on account of me," he continues.

"Frank don't." you stop him, his self-loathing creeping in like it had so many times before. The narrative woven into your relationship without your permission-- that you're Too Good for Frank Castle. You lean back from his chest to find his eyes. "YOU are exactly what I imagined for myself Frank Castle," you say with all the determination you felt.

His chocolate eyes scan your face before his hands find either side of your head to take your mouth in a kiss meant to convey a thousand words. I love you. I want you. I need you. Don't leave me. Don't die. His mouth moves with a desperate desire to consume you--to keep you just a little longer. That fucking curtain blowing in the breeze like a black flag playing in his mind. Like a man propelled forward with only momentum-- terrified if he stops you'll turn to dust.

You hear him inhale deeply through his nose as his tongue explores your mouth and your body melts into the strength of his. One arm laces behind your lower back as the other moves to cradle the back of your head, his hands weaving into your still-damp hair and tugging slightly to tilt your head upward. He uses the motion to trail his mouth down the length of your exposed neck as a breathy sigh escapes your open mouth.

"Frank-- it's ok-- I'm ok," you assure him in a whisper as his grip around you tightens. You know this Frank-- the Frank that's cracked open and terrified. The Frank that barrels forward fueled by the anger and rage of the things that have happened or could happen. The real Frank.

"I love you so fuckin' much," he says, his mouth returning to yours as his hand finds an anchor under your thigh to lift and guide your left leg around his waist, quickly followed by your right. Your core begins to throb as you feel the comforting size of him. The girth of his hips spreading your thighs apart. The expanse of his shoulders where your arms are draped. The power of his hands dug into your ass as he strides the length of the living room to place you gently in the patch of sun on the wood floor.

Positioned between your spread legs, he reaches forward to slide his old T-shirt off your body, taking a moment to mutter "fuck" as the sun hits your bare tits and he grips them possessively. His fingers sink into the waistband of your shorts and tug them down your legs, leaving you in only your wet panties clinging to your heated core. He slows now, his hands trailing up the sides of your hips, under your arms and down the length of your outstretched arms, pausing to lace his fingers into yours as he kisses you deeply.

"You gotta promise to be a good girl for me," he says between kissing the length of your neck to your collarbone. "Take all the precautions I say," he adds as he trails to the swell of your breast before sucking on your pert nipple. "No more mistakes princess," he continues, a trail of kisses peppered down your stomach.

His hand tugs are the waist of your panties and glides them over the curve of your hips and down your legs. He sees the slick coating of your puffy lips and a low whistle escapes his lips. "Can you promise to be good for me?" he asks, his hands drawing slow languid circles where your legs meet your hips.

"Frankie please," you whine, his form towering over yours, fully clothed and orchestrating your pleasure.

"Gotta hear you say it honey. Say you'll be a good girl," he says with a slight furrow of his brow.

"I'll be a good girl Frankie, I promise. Please," you mumble, taking the moment to open your eyes to find his-- your hips grinding to find friction.

"Sssh sssh," he hushes your desperation as his hand slides into your soaked folds. "Fuck honey, I didn't know it was this bad," he mumbles to himself, his hand working your petals, his finger slipping in and out of your needy hole. You gasp, your back arching, as the sunlight paints you in golden molten yellow.

The sight of you alights him and he sits on his haunches to fluidly remove his shirt and unbuckle his jeans, his cock already straining against them. He reaches in to guide this thick cock out and bends down to weave his arm behind your back again.

You whimper as he lifts you gingerly from the ground to straddle his lap, your slick core pressed against the length of his cock. "I gotchu sweetheart," he mumbles into your ear as he guides his cock into your velvety cavern.

He hisses and you feel like the air is squeezed from your lungs, perched on the expanse of Frank's thighs with the girth of his thick cock spearing you in place. Frank's slow intention before is replaced by feral desire, his pupils blown as he feels the full length of himself sheathed in your heavenly pussy. "Fuck sweetheart, you're so fucking tight," he says incredulously as your arms wrap around his shoulders to cling to his strength. "You tell me to stop if I'm hurtin' ya," he adds, finding your eyes for confirmation.

You lock eyes with him and shake your head no-- don't stop, never stop, stay this way forever-- your body nearly quivering with the sheer size of him. Your permission ignites him as he begins jutting his cock into you-- one pump, then two to make room before fucking into you with the full force of him.

You bounce on his lap like a ragdoll, holding onto his shoulders and looking down to see the way his cock splits you in two. His breath is ragged in your ear, with a fuck tumbling from his lips when you clench on his length. With each jut of his hips into your core, your swollen clit runs on the steely length of him, drawing you closer to bliss.

"Gonna make you feel good baby," he promises. Not just right now but for forever. For all the ways loving Frank Castle makes life harder he promises to make it worth it. "Gonna take care of you sweetheart," he says, sweat beading his brow as the force of cock slams deep into your belly. There's that terrified desperation again. His lust making way to fear, consuming you while he can hold you in his arms.

You look up at his face, twisted in concentration, fevered. "I know Frankie," you reassure him, pushing the stray hair from his forehead. "You take such good care of me," you agree, starting to roll your hips in his broad lap-- redefining the pace. You feel his breath slow as his head lolls back at the sensation of your cervix massaging the tip of his cock deep inside you. "You make me feel so good Frankie," you rasp, the statement so true it elicits tears from your eyes.

He finds your eyes and his hands find either side of your face. His mouth devours yours and then travels upwards to kiss away each tear that's escaped. "Fuck honey, I don't wanna lose you," he mutters with your tears on his lips, his eyes scanning your face as his cock is still buried deep within you.

"I'm staying Frankie. I'm here," you promise, the effort of riding him making the statement more of a whimper.

He senses your exhaustion and laces his arm again around your lower back, his other arm cradling your upper back. His support allows you to arch your back while his measured pumps become deeper and more purposeful. The long drag of his cock against your clit nearly unbearable. He feels you grip his biceps and knows you're close.

"Cum sweetheart. Do it for me, doll. Let me feel you," he croons as his lips travel down your neck. "Wanna make you feel good," he adds as his speed increases.

At his command, your bliss rips through you-- the sensation almost frightening in intensity. Your core is clenching so tightly around him that a guttural cry rips from your throat and the rest of your body goes limp in his arms. Only his support carries you through the waves of quaking and your ears ring like a bomb went off.

"Come back to me honey," you hear him say. His hand brushing the fallen hair from your face. "There's my girl," he smiles as your eyes flutter open, "there she is."

You place your hands on either side of Frank's face and cradle it, a gesture you might do to a cherubic baby but instead do to a man who inflicts pain for a living. His skin is rough, his nose puzzled together after a thousand breaks, his eyes crinkled at the corners. His cock is still steely inside you and you return to rolling your hips.

"Cum inside me Frankie. Fill me up," you beg the way he likes. He groans at your pleas. You reach for one of his arms and bring his hand to your mouth. You take his thumb in your mouth and suck it, holding his gaze as you roll your hips in his lap. "Fuck honey," he grunts before making three final forceful pumps into you before he coats your walls.

You stay this way-- entangled, embedded, soldered together by fire and metal -- until the patch of sun fades away.

[campbyler]

this is my prediction for chapter 9 since it’s the 🚗 emoji and since u guys talked about how there is some super special song for it (from ur twt post back in late august). so after scowling spotify for like ages i think???? the song might be breathless by the corrs cuz it matches the ********** by *** ***** asterisks u used & it’s lowk so fitting for acswy byler’s ~Situationship~ and SO i feel like they’ll be in mike’s god forsaken blue mustang and driving on maybe one of the allowed off-camp days (forgot what they’re officially called) and like well ok. I’m honestly taking inspiration from my own life for this prediction LOL but like they’re driving on the freeway or something with the windows down singing to songs and since ch9 is Will’s pov he’s gonna look over at Mike and think “wow he is so beautiful I love him. oh holy shit. I love him. I’m in love with Mike” and then smile at him but he’s not gonna actually say it (mainly bc I feel like with the 🗣️ emoji for ch 12 that’s when one of them will actually confess) but Yeah. I picture it this way bc in high school I had this exact situation happen with a guy i liked except we were singing to My Heart Will Go On by Celine Dion and he was singing along HORRIBLY yet i was still like Aw i love you so Yea that is My Chapter 9 Prediction™️

hey so on account of the fact that you sent this six months ago, i don't know if you're still reading or caught up or anything, but congratulations for being the only one to clock chapter 9, down to the closing song. you are as insane as we are ❤️❤️❤️

[gingerjunhan]

xdinary heroes on valentines day

☆彡 happy Valentine’s Day everybody!! Sending you all so much love❣️

word count: 1019 | pronouns used: none | genre: fluff, established relationship | cws: eating, pet names (pretty, baby, beautiful), “the rizzness,” a single swear word, drinking, lmk if I missed something!

goo gunil

way too excited (pt. 1)

Gunil is pouring his love out to you in literally any way imaginable

like, look me in the eye and tell me this man wouldn’t put his jacket over a puddle for you to walk over 👁️👁️

fancy dinner

flowers

the works

it’s over the top in a romantic way, not in the decor and hearts type of way

“I love you every day, you know that right? Not just today.”

holding your hand across the table and looking lovingly into your eyes SISNSKSND hold me down

gets you an extravagant gift that you insist that he shouldn’t have gotten you but he literally does not care

showers you with compliments and affection 🫶🏻

he’s been planning this for weeks, it has to be perfect

he shows up at your door, flowers in hand

and when you open the door to greet him he just

melts

“You look… stunning.”

UGH GOO GUNIL ONE CHANCE 🧎🏻‍♀️

he can’t keep his eyes off of you

he’s head over heels, falling in love all over again

kim jungsu

Jungsu strikes me as the type to love love, so he’s so so so happy

he finally has an excuse (not that he needs one) to shower you with so much love and affection that you feel like you’ll be sick of him by the end of the day

really thoughtful date!!

if this is your first Valentine’s Day together, maybe he’ll take you back to the spot where you had your first date together 🥹

the sweetest softest boy ever!!

matching outfits are a must

“You look so pretty, baby!!”

the brightest smile when he looks at you

you know the one he gets when his eyes sparkle?

yeah, that one

keeps you close all day

like, don’t lift a finger because he’s doing everything for you

gotta show his baby how much he loves and appreciates them!

cheesy couples photos

cute gifts

lots of chocolate and sweets

Jungsu goes full out on Valentine’s Day and you can’t tell me I’m wrong

kwak jiseok

Jiseok is a little nervous because it has to be perfect

if he messes something up today, it’s over 💀

stresses the whole week beforehand to get everything planned

but when the day comes, it’s nothing short of perfection

dinner at your favorite place

a cute couples activity

like pottery painting or something

the smile never leaves his face

he feels so lucky to be spending this day with you, and he won’t let you forget that!

“I’m so glad we can do this together. I love you so much.”

sneaking kisses any time he can

and then giggling afterwards

he is at your every whim

you want ice cream? let’s go right now

getting out your wallet to pay for dinner? it’s on him

your wish is his command

Princess Treatment™️ all day for suuure

cute little gifts like a stuffed animal and some flowers or chocolates

at the end of the night, he lets you know how much fun he had!

god, he loves you so much he thinks he might explode 💥

oh seungmin

bro is cranking up the rizzness to levels you’ve never seen

the epitome of being a gentleman

fancy restaurant reservations

fancy outfit

hell, he probably bought you your outfit as a gift (your first of many today)

huge bouquet of flowers

if I could describe the evening in one word: expensive

bro is not cheaping out on this day

no no no

“Only the best for my baby.”

he PAMPERS you

soft gazes and gentle smiles

whispered praises whenever you get a moment alone

intertwined hands at any moment

if he doesn’t tell you he loved you or remind you how beautiful you are at least 10 times today he’s failed

multiple expensive gifts just because he can

someone help this poor man’s bank account

after your fancy date, things die down a bit

a relaxing evening at home

maybe a couple of drinks

face masks? why not

light some candles, pour some wine, and turn on a movie to finish up the evening

han hyeongjun

believe it or not, he’s feeling confident!!

it would be stereotypical, but the day would go smoothly

a sweet, handwritten card

a small bouquet of flowers

a box of chocolate

you can go to dinner if you want

or he could make you dinner! it’s up to you

I feel like Hyeongjun would shine in the gift department

like,, you are definitely getting something handmade!

he would make you a card out of crayons, construction paper, and glitter glue and you better LOVE IT 🫵🏻

sorry I got excited

he struggles a bit with showing affection, so he would use Valentine’s Day to make it up to you in a way?

does he follow the typical setup of the day? yes

but do either of you mind? no!

“I know it’s not much, but I just wanted to show you that I care about you.”

he sticks close by all day, trying his best to be a little more affectionate than normal

he would try to pack in the complements too

he tries his hardest, and it’s great!

overall, you have a really nice day full of love and thoughtful messages and gifts

lee jooyeon

way too excited (pt. 2)

cheesy decorations

giant teddy bear

rose petals

way too many candles

the works

he would definitely be the type to fill your bedroom with heart-shaped balloons and cover your bed with rose petals 💀

it’s cheesy, but he doesn’t care because he loves you

gives you all the sweet little treats a person could ask for

he would attempt (keyword: “attempt”) to bake you a cake

it’s the thought that counts, right? 🫶🏻

he gives me stay-at-home date vibes!

all your favorite snacks and candies are laid out for you, and your favorite movie/show is already cued up for you to watch

“I got all of my favorite person’s favorite things!”

he’s clinging to you

like, you might as well be wearing the same shirt

it’s a very chill evening full of sweet kisses, warm hugs, and lots of love 🫶🏻

taglist: @dazzlingligth , @mini-mews , @mxlly143 , @somethingaboutcheese , comment to be added!⁎⁺˳✧༚