#the backup situation exists and I think this is how things will work out

[domoz]

CW for suffocation (of someone else)

Getting an Uchiha trapped in a genjutsu is as difficult as it sounds.

Touka has learned that there's no point in changing what see ages ago. She's good enough that they won't notice the difference without a sharingan, but the moment it's on they'll break it. If they're on edge -- and Izuna Uchiha certainly is -- they'll turn it on for anything. His eyes turned red thirty minutes ago, when some animal made enough noise to startle him and haven't been off since.

So Touka hasn't put anything in his path that might tip him off. Her genjutsu is all subtle -- her own sounds muffled as she trails him though the autumn woods and one of the mildest disorientation genjutsus that exist. It's not enough to make him off balance, but just enough to have him listing to one side as he walks. On top of that, if she's laid it right, he should only think it's been five minutes instead of the half an hour it's taken for her to lead him away from the rest of his squad.

He clearly knows that something is wrong by now, recognizes that he's been turned around but can't quite seem to pinpoint how. He won't take more than a few steps now before he pauses to look around. Forward progress has slowed to a crawl, Izuna isn't getting any further away from backup, and sooner or later they're going to come looking for him -- if he doesn't realize that someone is trying to catch him first.

Touka had more-or-less assigned herself this mission after her last spar with Tobirama. She has no support here, and not much confidence that she can win a one-on-one fight. It's hard work to shave a win off of Tobirama on the best of days, and he usually doesn't try to actually kill her.

She pushes all of the air out of her lungs with a silent whoosh, hands coming up to form the signs, slow and precise, of one of her own techniques.

It's a funny thing, breathing. Automatic until you think about it, and then it's all you can focus on. In a middle of a stressful situation, it's common to not realize that you've stopped. The darkness that creeps into the edge of your vision is slow, and without the feeling of discomfort, it's almost too easy to forget that you've stopped doing it.

If Izuna realizes something has happened he'll be onto her for certain, but he's not breathing now.

Twenty seconds. Thirty. Sixty. His movements start to slow, his blinking goes sluggish, and red eyes fade to black. Lack of air impairs judgement too, but she can't trust that he won't realize something is wrong at any moment.

Sweat beads at Touka's brow. She doesn't use this technique often, hasn't had the chance to practice and refine it to a more workable chakra cost. Her own hands tremble as she holds the threads of all the genjutsu she's woven. One more.

Touka has never heard of an Uchiha being fooled by a henge of one of their own clanmates before, but she risks it anyways. Any good genjutsu master spends time observing their enemies, but there's one Uchiha she has more material on than the others, and her only stroke of luck in this whole endeavor is that he was among the group she'd lured Izuna away from.

Hikaku Uchiha's skin feels tight on her, but with she shakes it off with the ease of practice, rolls her shoulders, and steps out from behind the cover of her tree. Izuna doesn't react to the sound of her steps right away -- a good sign.

"Izuna-sama." She's short of breath herself, when her voice comes out as Hikaku's it sounds like he's been running, "We've been looking all over for you. Why are you out here?"

"I was, uh… Patrol…?" His eyebrows furrow as he uses up the last of his air.

"Are you alright?" It's easy enough to feign concern, and Izuna only blinks in confusion when she puts her hands on his shoulders.

He only puts up a token resistance as she kicks his legs out from under him and pushes him face down in the dirt. The shock of it breaks all of her genjutsu at once, and she lets the henge drop for good measure, all focus now on getting his arms and legs tied. He wheezes underneath her, not able to get the full breath she's sure he desperately wants with her full weight between his shoulders.

Wrists are tied, then elbows, ankles then knees. She cuts a long bandage into strips and covers his eyes and mouth, too. Only once she has the Uchiha properly hogtied does she roll him over and start removing weapons

He's still taking heaving breaths, around the gag. He twitches when she reaches out to pat one cheek.

"Hey, me catching you here is better than the other thing was going to happen to you. We're all lucky I pulled this off, really."

Izuna shakes his head as violently as her ties will allow. He doesn't get it, probably wouldn't believe her even if she told him Tobirama has finally found his way to beat the sharingan, but that's fine. If they play their cards right, he'll never have to know at all.

[veryloovy]

Cyn is the administrator of every Disassembly Drone, and Cyn (the Solver?) also has backups of them should they die. Uzi is also a Solver-user and she is now the administrator of N and V.

I feel like Uzi could have backups of our N and V, which is only important should they die. Granted, Cyn's backups come with a body (likely produced from the mass the Solver has consumed) and Uzi's backups would likely only be able to copy their mind into another body. Which I guess makes our clone N and V able to be Workers again should the opportunity present itself (something that, should it happen, would probably only happen towards the end of the show). Otherwise, I assume that "Tessa" brought unused clone bodies for N and V with her in one of the other pods, which could be used in case Uzi needs to put her backups into a body too (and prevent Cyn's backups from going in).

I think this the main reason for bringing up the whole adminship thing with Disassembly Drones. So far it's mostly been used to stop memory wiping and block out memory access on them (ep5 and ep7, the only exception to the adminship memory stuff is Cyn blocking AS on N in ep1). It's definitely seems memory-tied, and backups also tie into that since they capture memories.

(I'm super congested rn hoping this reads soundly)

[bunnyley00]

Bittersweet Punishment

pairing: gang member fem!reader x mafia boss!nanami

genre: slight angst, smut, fluff

rating: 18+ 

word count: 7.8K (something's wrong with me ik)

warnings: slightly angsty, mention of drug usage, nanami is emotionally constipated but eventually figures it out, light bondage with a certain item ahem, impact play (spanking), dirty talk, light degradation, overstim, sex on multiple surfaces, punishment kink, orgasm denial, hair pulling, fingering, oral sex, dom nanami, fluffy aftercare

When you don’t listen to your boss who happens to be running the biggest crime syndicate in the world, there’s ultimately going to be consequences.  

Joining the crime ring scene was probably one of the best decisions you could’ve made with your life. Abandoned by your father, and taking care of your mother as she widdled her existence away doing drugs, you had nowhere else to go. Your other relatives were too far away, and they didn’t even know you. So, you sucked it up and finished school, and managed to get a good job at some random company as a data analyst. You always hated it, felt like you were wasting your life away every day at a desk. The only thing that made it worthwhile was your boss: Nanami Kento. He was tall, handsome, and precise with everything he did. Seeing him about once every week to give him your written reports was always a highlight. You strove to go above and beyond, looking for a sense of purpose through your occupation. Needless to say, it paid off. 

You see, Nanami wasn’t the man you thought him to be. Yes, he looked strong, probably capable of throwing someone across a room, but you had never seen him act out or be violent. So when one random weekend, you received an anonymous invitation to some undisclosed location miles out, only to discover that the Nanami Kento you know happened to be the leader of the Kaisen Syndicate, you didn’t know how to react. But from then forward, you knew you had found something truly special. If you remember the way he put it: “I respect your tenacity and work ethic more than anything else. I would like to see if you’re willing to display those qualities elsewhere.” 

At first, you wanted to deny him, to tell him he’s insane and how could he be in charge of such a terrifying and dangerous group of people. But then, you take a moment. This Syndicate has done terrible things, yes, but only to terrible people: drug dealers, traffickers, money laundering schemists; The list goes on. Even if their methods were less than… moral, the result was a cleaner world, and you could get behind that. So you trained as hard as you possibly could, breaking your limits one by one, body and soul. You probably worked the hardest to get where you were, and it felt good to reap the benefits. You never grew hungry, or without. The Syndicate was like family to you, one you never had. But Nanami, he was always who you had your eyes on, seeking his approval and praise, bettering yourself not only for you but for him. So he could finally just see you without the eyes of a man who’s just in charge.  

You suddenly come to your senses, remembering that you were in a Syndicate meeting and it was hardly the time for a trip down memory lane. This is a huge job. That’s what you think half haphazardly in your mind anyway as Nanami continues with his meeting about the next mission that needs to be carried out for the inevitable expansion of the group. A deal had gone wrong with an enemy gang for some material a month back, and now we were to seize the materials forcefully… use them as an example of sorts. That was the gist anyway. The intel was crucial for everyone who could be chosen for situations like this, in case something doesn’t go according to plan. That’s who Nanami was, even at the company; He was someone who had backup plans for his backup plans. But, who could blame him? Working as a salaryman as a front for his mafioso dealings, he needed the insurance. It wasn’t an option. 

You’d felt as though you’d certainly be chosen for this mission. You were undoubtedly one of the best in the middle ranks, and your colleagues knew how hard you worked. Someone with barely any prior knowledge of combat, manipulation, and intel gathering forced you to become a novice overnight, something everyone respected you for. 

Nanami paced back and forth slowly and methodically in front of a projector displaying the area that would be infiltrated while explaining the details. “As previously stated, this will be a two-man operation at most. There is no need to send the whole Syndicate to a rival organization that cannot respect us or have the common decency to behave. Therefore we shall not be overextending ourselves and show them that we will not be toyed with, with as minimal effort as possible.” His voice was monotone yet smooth, words coming out with purpose.

“You will get in, dispose of any that get in your way, gather the product and return to me. In addition, there is an envelope that you will deliver to their leader. Under no circumstances will you kill him. While it could dissolve them, it could also lead to another person being inclined to take his place and start a full-on war. I’m not a fan of working overtime, as you all know, so a war is not a goal of mine.” 

The room full of members all hummed and nodded in agreement, and you continued to watch Nanami, his words beginning to drown out as you watched him walk. He was clad in his usual attire, always in some sort of suit and tie. The jacket fit him just right but the dress shirt underneath was always a little too small for him in the best way. You swore you could see the outline of his pecks, that the buttons were probably screaming to be let free from the prison that was his fit abdominal structure. 

“I will summon the two members suited for the job later today. You’re all dismissed.” 

Those words made you snap out of your trance, and you stood up, letting everyone file out. You were one of the last ones to leave the meeting room, but Nanami stopped you. 

“Wait. There’s something I’d like to discuss with you,” he piped up as he gathered up files and mission info neatly. He’d been doing that quite frequently lately, asking you about your training, about your work at the company, about just…you in general. It never bothered you one bit. 

“Yes?,” you ask politely as you turn around, making your way toward him. Your eyes meet his through his glasses, the green tint making it hard to see his actual dark brown eyes. “How has your physical condition been lately? I was informed that you pushed too hard during your spar last week. You were limping for days.” You let out a soft, “Pshh,” waving a bit with your hand, “I’m okay. It was just a few scratches.” 

Nanami hated when you lied, especially because you were shit at it. “Besides,” you continue, “Should it matter? I’m just another cog in the machine, right?” “No,” he stated in rebuttal, “I respect and trust every one of my colleagues. Had you been someone else I would’ve asked the same questions.” 

‘Wow, way to make me feel special, boss,’ you thought before mentally berating yourself for expecting any other response but that one. 

You hum, watching his large hands continue to fiddle with papers. “How have you been, then?” you ask with a raise of your eyebrows. “I hardly see how that information is relevant.” “Because I respect and trust you, I want to know how you’re doing. Same concept.” He knew you were playfully mocking him, then again, you always did that.  “It’s not the same. You don’t bear my burdens so my feelings aren’t what matters here.” 

God, he was so confusing when he did this. You couldn’t help but roll your eyes at him. “Sure, boss.” “That attitude is why you’re always getting into heated scraps. And you know I dislike the title ‘boss’,” he mused, “Even at the company I can’t stand it.” He finally finished gathering his things. “Just continue to execute like you always have. You’re one of my best, don’t squander it by getting so hurt that you can’t.” 

“Yes Sir,” you answered back respectfully, internally blushing at the words ‘one of my best’. He very rarely complimented you so directly in this line of work. 

A day later, you prepared yourself to be called into Nanami’s office at Syndicate Headquarters, the pre-mission butterflies floating around in your stomach in a way that made you increasingly giddy. Walking about the halls, you waited and waited, looking for an announcement, listening for gossip on who he’d chosen. You hoped to hear your name amongst the hushed whispers. However, what you found out frankly just pissed you off. 

“Didn’t you know?”, Itadori asked, chewing on a piece of his milk bread fruit sandwich. “Know what?”, you cocked an eyebrow up. “Nanamin chose me and Takuma-san.” “He what?!” “Yeah, the meeting was earlier this morning. I asked him if he was sure and he just said what he always does. The whole, ‘This is the most efficient way’ spiel.” Your eye twitched and Itadori knew exactly what you were about to do, “Good luck.” 

The other members could see it all over your face, and didn’t try to stop you as you practically stormed up to his office. They knew only you would get away with stunts like this, outwardly and inappropriately showing your anger and or frustration over a decision that’s already been made. You didn’t even bother knocking, just opening the door to a quiet Nanami penning away in his notebook at his desk. “So was it a lie?,” you said curtly, letting the heavy door shut behind you.

“I was expecting you. What are you talking about?”, he spoke up, glancing up at you before returning his eyes to his work. “You know exactly what I’m talking about.” “Is this about the mission?”, he asked, finally giving you his full attention. “Is this about the mission? Of course it is! ‘You’re one of my best’? Was it a lie?” “Why would I lie about something like that?”, he asked calmly. “Well, obviously I’m not because you’re sending Itadori and Takuma! I’m just as good if not better for the job!” Nanami sat back in his large leather chair, fixing his glasses. “Just because I’m not sending you doesn’t mean you’re not equipped for the job.” “So why?!” “Don’t yell.” You didn’t even have time to register who exactly you were talking to and kept going, genuinely hurt by his seeming oversight of your abilities after all this time. “No! I want to know why I won’t be there!”

Nanami grew quiet, just watching you. Why did he not send you? You were an easy choice. Reliable, capable, strong. He trusted you more than some of the other people under his wing. It should’ve been a ‘home run’ so to speak. But, something in his chest stirred when he thought about you facing off an entire organization basically on your own. You weren’t quite ready yet. It felt…wrong to send you. “Because both Itadori and Takuma are a bit more experienced.” “Bullshit.” “Excuse me?” “Did I stutter?! Bull! I don’t care if they are! I’ve worked my ass off! I deserve this! Stop lying to me. Do you think I’m too weak? Is that it? Is it because I’m a woman?! You think I just belong back at the office?!” You knew that didn’t make any sense. Gender never mattered to Nanami, but you were just so angry you wanted to, as bad as it sounded, blame him for something.

Those words made Nanami’s brow furrow. He was getting quite irritated. “You deserve it? Please tell me how exactly you do when you’re in here throwing a fit like a child. And don’t you dare imply such a disgustingly sexist and absurd thing. Not only are you disrespecting me but yourself as well. You aren’t going. That’s my final say on the matter.” You felt more and more of your emotions swirling inside of you, manifesting itself as heat in your face and fingertips. “What’s the matter with you?! You compliment me and give me extra attention and training and tell me I’m one of the best but you don’t send me on one of the most important jobs since I’ve been here?!” You raise your arms in defeat, fighting not to get teary-eyed. 

“Yes! That’s exactly what’s happening!”, he raised his voice back, fed up with your attitude and how you spewed baseless accusations at him. The tone was deep and almost guttural, and it made your eyes widen in surprise and your body jump, startled at the outburst. He never got like this. Nanami couldn’t comprehend why you were so upset. He was just trying to make sure that you didn’t overextend yourself. That was the only reason. Right?…Right? 

You grew quiet, eyes and body relaxing before biting your lip, your eyes growing cloudy despite your efforts. “You know what? Fine. You don’t want me to go? I won’t,” Nanami wanted to apologize for raising his voice, but he knew it would fall on deaf ears. You began to turn around to walk out before turning your head to look at him. “Anything else I should be informed of before I leave, Kento?” Nanami clenched his jaw slightly. You were one of the few people who knew his name. The other members would just call him “Leader” or “Boss”, much to his dismay. Nevertheless, you never used it until now. “You’re dismissed.” He watched you stomp off, putting his head in his hands as soon as the door to his office closed behind you. 

The day of the mission was nigh, and per the meeting, you knew when your coworkers would head out and where to meet. “Screw Nanami. I’ll fucking show him,” you mumble to yourself, getting dressed in all-black attire to carry out the mission without his permission. You prepped as much as you could, and when you arrived at the rendezvous point in the dead of night, both Itadori and Takuma recognized you immediately. 

“Uhh, what are you doing here?!,” Takuma whisper-yelled frantically. “I told you she’d show up,” Itadori mused, a quiet laugh slipping past his lips, “I don’t know why she wasn’t put on the mission in the first place.” “How’d you even know it was me?”, you asked, looking around to make sure the coast was clear. “Because you’re the only one stupid enough to defy Nanami like this,” Takuma stated matter of factly, “And who cares if she’s just as capable, she wasn’t chosen,” he said to Itadori. The pink-haired boy just shrugged, “I’m sure we could use the extra help. I mean, sure Nanamin wouldn’t be necessarily happy about it but we’d get the job done.” Takuma just groaned in disapproval, “Whatever. I don’t approve of this but I can’t stop you.” You gave both of them a cheeky smile, “You’re right. You can’t.” 

Some part of you wished he had stopped you. The mission was successful but at the cost of heavy bodily injuries. Takuma got the worst of it, and you were right behind him. Somehow, though, Itadori came out mostly unscathed, with only a few bruises littering his body. He was always kinda freaky like that, like a walking superhuman. You, on the other hand, had various wounds ranging from stabs, to dark purple and yellow bruises, and your back was littered with scratches from a glass window pane you were kicked through. You wore the injuries proudly though, musing that they were your badge for succeeding. The other members couldn’t help breaking into whispers the moment you 3 returned to Headquarters, no doubt talking about you. You didn’t have the fucks to give though, and you proceeded up to Nanami’s office with head held high. 

The moment Nanami saw you with Itadori and Takuma, he was fuming. It was exactly why he didn’t want you to go in the first place. You were hurt badly and it made him rethink his… feelings toward you because the way his chest felt seeing you that way didn’t feel normal. “Itadori, Takuma,” his eyes landed on you next, taking in your state. “All three of you-,” he was interrupted by Takuma, “Sir, I told them I didn’t approve but-,” It was Nanami’s turn to interrupt him. “I care not about the details of who went. How did the mission fair?” “Went off without a hitch!”, Itadori smiled, “More people resisted than we initially thought though. Took a lot for them to actually get scared.” Nanami hummed, “And the envelope?”

“I delivered it,” you piped up, “It’s with their boss safe and sound. The materials are also back in our possession as well.” “Is that so? Good. Well, as per usual, based on your condition you shall all take a short break from the field. Itadori, you should only need a week or so, right?” Itadori nodded, “Yeah Nanamin! I’ll be all good.” “I thought I said stop calling me that.” “Aw, but it’s a really good nickna-.” “Whatever,” Nanami gives up. They have that conversation every other day and it always goes nowhere anyway. “Takuma, 2 weeks for you. There’s nothing broken, right?” Takuma shook his head. “Just lots and lots of bruising, heh,” he lifted his hand to scratch the back of his head but winced as he did so. 

Nanami returned his hard gaze to you. “I want you on a month's hiatus.” “But-” “No arguing. You have deep stab wounds that need stitching and proper healing. I just know you’ll do nothing but go back to training if you return here. A month at the least.” You couldn’t even fight back, he was right. The wounds were fighting to close, hot and throbbing. “The nurse downstairs will tend to all of you. Go home after, get some rest,” he stood, looking at all of you, “Good job for a successful mission despite some changes in the moment. I’m glad you’re all alright. You’re dismissed.”

After Itadori and Takuma left, you expected to be called back, but Nanami just sat back down at his mahogany desk, continuing to work. “No reprimand?,” you asked in the quiet of the room. He glanced up at you, “Not at this time. Your recovery is more important. You’ll receive some corrective action when you return. I’ll see you at the company in the meantime.” That was unlike him, but you supposed he already felt bad for the argument the both of you had earlier. “Not kicking me out are you?” “Not in the slightest. You just need some… readjustment for your behavior.” “Sure thing, Sir. Goodnight.” “Goodnight. And I’m not lying when I say that I am glad you’re alright.” The statement made you smile a bit. “Yeah.” 

The next month went by fairly quickly, although you weren’t going to Syndicate Headquarters every night. You almost enjoyed the break from the constant fighting, and ended up taking a bit more extra time. You still saw Nanami every day at your day job. The clothes you wore covered most bandages, and you explained the visible ones away as just plain, clumsy behavior. Your wounds healed nicely and at a rate you didn’t expect. Only one stab wound needed stitches. You’d surely have scars but that didn’t bother you. They were merely proof that you were alive. So, when you were back at the Syndicate after almost 2 months, you were welcomed with open arms, literally. They all dog-piled onto you like you’d been gone for years, saying that they’d missed you and your presence around the place. You smiled and laughed with them, once again incredibly grateful for such a large group of people who loved you unconditionally. “Oh! Nanamin said he wanted to welcome you back. He’s in his office,” Itadori informed you. “Okay,” you nodded, promising you’d be back as you made your way toward your leader’s door. 

“You asked for me?”, you piped up as you opened it, letting it close behind you. Nanami was standing, both hands leaning back on his desk. “Lock it.” “Huh?” “Lock the door.” Your heart started beating a little faster just then. “Why?” “I just don’t want to be interrupted.” “O-kay?”, you spoke slowly, following his directions. “Welcome back.” He took off his glasses, running his hand through his blonde hair before setting them aside. Sometimes you forgot that he didn't actually need them to see. He then asked, “How are your wounds?” “Glad to be back,” you smiled, “They’re way better. That extra time I took sped up the healing process..” What was he up to? He looked… different somehow. Oh, how you had no idea. “That’s good. There are 3 things I’d like to inform you of…,” he trailed off, his eyes intense. “First, I am sorry for yelling at you.” You looked down at the floor, “I’m sorry for yelling as well… and accusing you.” “I now know why I was so adamant on keeping you from the mission,” he continued, letting his hands softly move him off of the desk and toward you, “And that brings me to number two.” He used one hand to slowly lift your chin, and the action surprised you. Your eyes widened slightly, and you swore you could hear your heartbeat in your ears. “It was more than your skill set, or even keeping you from overextending yourself.” His voice was silky smooth, deep in all the right ways as he spoke to you. “It was because I wanted to keep you from harm's way. I didn’t want to see you in pain or with so many injuries. Because in reality…,” he’d been slowly walking you back, yet you didn’t notice and were surprised when your back hit a solid wall. 

His face moved past yours and dipped down for his mouth to reach your ear, the tips of them hot much like the rest of your body. “I’ve always wanted you,” he whispered. “Every part of you. At first, I thought it may be just the way I admire your tenacity. It wasn’t an unreasonable thought. You work hard, all for me, don’t you?” You didn’t even register that a question was asked, mouth dry and mind foggy from the kindling of fire in your lower regions. Your breath rose and fell steadily but deeply, your breasts almost rubbing against him with each inhale. “I,” you started, “I, yeah. I do.” “Exactly. And then I thought: ‘How did I not notice?’ Whether you’re at the company, making sure you wear a low-cut shirt so the tops of your breasts are flashing me while you read off your report to me, or when you wear tight pants to incite me to look at your curves at the Headquarters, you’re always seeking my attention. And more importantly, you’re seeking my praise. Am I wrong?”

He was reading you like a book now, and even though it took him an eternity, you still didn’t expect to feel so exposed in the moment. He pulled his head back a bit to re-establish the heady eye contact. You tried to be coy. “I mean, not necessarily,” you managed to breathe out. “You really are bad at lying, you know? The extra training, the almost excessive reporting, taking on extra work, asking me repeatedly, ‘How’d I do?’ The look on your face when I compliment you is filled with warmth and something else. But I can probably infer what that is.” 

Being pinned against the wall was the least of your worries, as your clit throbbed against your panties, hands at your sides and Nanami kept you caged in like a predator closing in on his prey. “And the third thing?”, your voice trembled. “Ah, the third thing. Do you recall what I said before you left my office 2 months ago?” “Something about readjusting my behavior?”, you breathed, beginning to put the pieces together. “That’s right. Good girl.” The shiver that ran down your spine shouldn’t have been that intense, and it made you squirm against him. “Now, is this what you want?” His question was serious, not laced with arousal but genuine. “Maybe,” you said slightly playfully. “A terrible liar as always,” he said quietly, leaning down to kiss you. Your lips slotted together slowly yet intensely, and it was everything you’d been waiting for. His large hands made their way to your waist, squeezing you softly as you moaned into his mouth. He let you indulge because this would be the last time you would for a while. Your arms made their way up to his broad shoulders, wrapping around them while he nipped at your bottom lip. 

Your body screamed, begged for more, the heat in between your legs growing in intensity. After what felt like an eternity of teasing bites, small prods of tongues, and little sounds being consumed by Nanami’s lips, he pulled back. You just about whined and Nanami couldn’t help a small smirk. “I’m sure you’ll live. You waited this long, right? Don’t forget,” he squeezed your hips a bit more, “This is a punishment. You directly disobeyed my orders. So now I have to take my time and break you down piece by piece, and put you back together again.” “Heh,” you let out a breathy laugh, “Is that what you intend to do?” “Oh, darling, it’s what I’m going to do.” 

You had to be dreaming, but the way your breath hitched and your pussy ached had to be real. His hands moved upward, trailing the sides of your abdomen and then shifting to take the hem of your shirt and lift it up. You let the shirt slide over your head, watching as he tossed it aside. You took no time in taking off your shoes, Nanami leaning down to kiss you again as he kneaded your tits through your bra as you worked on your pants. Now that he’s gotten a taste of you, he is going to indulge in every facet of your body. As soon as your pants were discarded you were left in your matching bra and panty set. He pulled back. “I want you bent over my desk, with your hands resting on your back.” You nodded a bit, “O-Okay,” you said breathily as your body began moving towards the desk. His words stopped you in your tracks. “Okay, what?” “Okay, Sir,” you corrected yourself, and you swore your pussy got wetter. “That’s better. Good girl.” 

He watched you get into position, and when you were, he took a moment to admire your body, how small it was compared to him. It made his dick throb a bit in his pants. In just a few minutes you’d be putty in his hands, moaning and writhing all for him. It really did take him too long to get here. You heard the sound of clothes rustling and then what you immediately recognized to be his tie tying your wrists together. The desk was cold against your skin, sending goosebumps along every inch of it. “Isn’t that your favorite tie?”, you asked playfully. He only reserved his tan suit and speckled tie for special occasions. “It is. Why wouldn’t I wear it on a day when I train a brat on how to behave?”, he asked, finishing the knot and following up his question with a smack against your ass. 

“Ah!,” you yelped in surprise, squirming against the desk. “Not too loud now,” Nanami mused, “You wouldn’t want the rest of the Syndicate to know how much of a disobedient brat you are, would you?” Slap. “A-Ah! No!” “No, what?” Slap. “N-No, Sir!” “Good, good.” He rubbed his hand against your now slightly red cheeks, the touch soft despite his calloused hands. “This is long overdue, you know? How many times have you disobeyed me? Ignored my instructions because you felt like you could do it better your way? Even at the company, trying to undermine my authority.” Slap. “F-Fuck,” you moaned, fighting back the instinct to get loud. “It really is a pity, darling, that I had to resort to such,” slap, “physical means of getting through to you.” Your ass was on fire and you jumped a little every time Nanami’s hand came down on your cheeks. You wanted to squirm away but it felt so good. At this point, your panties were soaked with your wetness, a visible spot on them. 

Nanami watched while you squirmed and shifted on the desk, your ass jiggling with every sharp movement. You were nearly on your tippy toes, and he could tell you were enjoying yourself. “Now, how many times do you think I should bring my hand down on this ass of yours?”, he asked. You heard him shift and then felt fingers tugging at the hem of your panties. They were pulled down slowly, your bare ass now on display. A wet string of slick connected you to your panties until it broke, the clothing item now at your feet. “I-I don’t know,” you whined, the cold of the room hitting your core. “You don’t? Want to take a guess, darling?” Nanami reached a hand to your pussy, lightly running two large fingers against your folds. You gasped and moaned, hips moving back against the touch. “You won’t get what you want until you give me a number.” Your forehead was up against the mahogany wood, breath escaping as mild panting, heating up your face more in the process while he persistently teased your pussy. “T-Ten,” you finally spoke up. 

“Only ten? Do you really think a brat like you only deserves ten?” Nanami did a few quick circles on your clit. “Fuck, N-Nanami, I don’t know, please.” “Hm? Please what? You still haven’t honored my request yet.” He pulled his fingers back. “Okay! O-kay. Twenty?” “Twenty sounds fair enough for all the trouble you’ve put me through. Good girl.” Slap. “That’s one.” “Shit!” Nanami used his other hand to continue to rub your clit at a painstakingly slow pace, occasionally dipping the tip of his digits into your entrance. Slap. “Mmfm!,” you moaned, biting your lip to hold in your sounds. With every slap came the delicious feeling of focusing on his fingers, but the combination of pleasure and pain left you dizzy. “You’re enjoying yourself aren’t you, darling?” Slap. “Does this feel good? Me punishing you for being a bad little brat?” Slap. “Your greedy pussy is dripping for me.” Slap. “G-God, yes it feels good!”, you answered obediently and he rewarded you, sheathing the full length of both fingers inside of you. “You look so gorgeous tied up like this.” Slap. “I should punish you more often, shouldn’t I?” Slap. You were drowning in pleasure rutting back against his fingers and eating the satisfying sting of his palm against your ass. Although the pace was slow, the knot in your lower abdomen began to build, your orgasm creeping toward you like a thief in the night. By the last slap you were whining and whimpering, Nanami’s fingers still working inside of you. 

“Would you like to cum, darling?”, he drawled, the sound of his fingers entering and exiting your hot, wet slit filling the room. “Y-yes! Please!”, you beg without much fight, cloud nine so close but so far. Nanami kept going, speeding up his fingers until he felt your legs tremble and your breath become uneven. You were just about to tip over the edge and then…nothing. The loud whine that you let escape your mouth didn’t even sound like you to your ears, and Nanami took both hands and squeezed your thoroughly reddened ass cheeks, your arousal still on his fingers. “It seems that you’ve forgotten that this was a punishment, darling. You don't quite get what you want yet.” “Nanami,” you whined again, hips moving back in search of something, anything to cure the ache in between your legs. “You really are an impatient little thing aren’t you?” 

Nanami helped you get to your feet and guided you to the other side of his desk. He sat in his chair. “Kneel for me,” he spoke up, and you followed directions swiftly. He made sure that you didn’t lose your balance. You watched as he unfastened his belt, and you felt a sliver of shame as your mouth began to water. He unbuttoned his pants and then looked at you. “Use your teeth.” “Yes, Sir,” you almost moaned, leaning your upper body forward to get into position. You let your teeth grab ahold of his zipper, following a command of, “Look at me,” as you pulled it down slowly. Nanami let out a small sigh and assisted you in pulling his throbbing dick out of his pants. It bounced out of his briefs, his tip sticky with his pre. “Show me you’re a good girl,” he spoke up, using a hand to softly caress your jaw and trailing it up into your hair. 

You leaned into the touch, letting out a soft, “Yes, Sir,” as you let your head descend and your mouth wraps around the tip of his cock. It was thick, and you moaned at the taste of his pre cum. Looking up at him, you began to slowly bob your head, coating his length in your saliva. He groaned, letting his head rest against his chair as he watched you intently. “That’s a good girl. There we go, just like that,” he praised, making your already swollen clit almost hurt from the arousal. You lifted your head off of his dick, licking from his balls to the tip repeatedly to trace the pulsating veins that ran up it. Your head went back down onto him again, taking him in more and more with each movement. His hand guided you through it all, your sticky spit running down his dick and onto his balls. You began to wonder if you could really handle not cumming for this long, your pussy hot and needy. You tried to sneak your other hand down to your clit and the grip he had on your hair tightened. “Where’s that hand going, darling? Did I say you could touch yourself?”, he asked, pulling your head up and off of him. 

Your spit ran down your chin. “N-No.” “Right, I didn’t say that, did I? So why is your hand trying to play with your bratty little pussy?” You moved your hand. “I-I’m sor-” The moment you did he pushed your head back down onto his cock, moving it up and down forcefully. “And here I thought you learned your lesson,” he grunted, moaning at your hot mouth, “But I guess brats never really learn do they? Have you got anything to say? Hm?” You struggled to produce the words ‘I’m sorry’ as his dick moved in and out of your mouth and throat, the sounds coming out garbled and riddled with wet, sloppy sounds. “Yeah? Are you sure?”, Nanami asked, his brow furrowing from the pleasure. You attempted to say yes, but gave up entirely, letting him use your mouth. He pulled your head off when he was close, dick pulsating as he denied himself sweet release. You coughed and sputtered a bit, eyes watery from the forcefulness of it all. Nanami leaned down and pulled your head up, kissing you hard enough to take the little wind left you had out of your lungs. 

You gasped as he suddenly stood, picked you up, and put you on the desk, but ass up face down. He sat back down in his chair, your wet pussy right in front of his mouth. “Is this what you want?”, he spoke right against it and you moved your ass back so much you almost fell. He held your ass and hips. “Please, Kento, please,” you begged, a whining mess with your cheek up against the wood. “I want it, I want it.” Nanami didn’t leave you hanging, instantly starting to suck on your clit. “Oh god f-fuck!” His mouth sucked and licked at your slit, taking in the taste of your arousal with a low groan. He hummed, letting the vibrations give you a bit of extra sensation. Your hips rocked and shook, and he held you tight, not allowing you an inch of movement as he ate you out like it was the last thing he’d ever do. “Kento! Oh god, Kento fuck!-” “So vocal for me. Although I don’t expect anything else from a brat like you who can’t keep her mouth shut otherwise.” He let his long tongue dip inside of you, pushing your hips back and forth to tongue fuck you. His thumbs spread your ass cheeks apart, opening up your pussy for him. 

You were so sensitive you were shaking. Your tits were rubbing against the desk, nipples hard from the teasing stimulation. Your pussy clenched around his tongue and once again you felt your orgasm creep up on you while Nanami licked you. He sucked on your clit repeatedly, letting it go with a small pop sound over and over again, switching between that and using his tongue to soak your slit in his spit. “Shit- shit, fuck,” you panted, brows knitted tightly on your face as your eyes shut. Nanami knew you were close, could see it in the way your legs trembled and your moans broke up into gibberish. “Going to cum, darling? Hm?” “Yes! Pl-please! Kento! Let me cum!” Nanami kept licking and sucking and like clockwork, as soon as the precipice was before you, you were yanked back. It almost made you want to cry. “Kento cut it out, please! I’ll be good, I p-promise! I-”

Your sentence was interrupted by Nanami adjusting you and pulling your legs back down so your toes touched the floor again. He stood up and started to press himself into you, his cock stretching you out in a way you didn’t think was possible. You were so close to finishing the feeling of him sheathing himself inside of you made you cum. “F-fuck! Oh fuck!” You moaned and writhed and Nanami growled behind you, starting to slowly piston his dick inside of your pussy. His hands traveled up to his dress shirt, unbuttoning it and tossing it aside while he fucked you. “You said you wanted to cum, right? Isn’t that what you wanted, darling?,” he breathed. Being edged made you 10 times more sensitive, and all you could do was moan and hiccup from the way your pussy convulsed around his length. “I’m giving you what this pussy wants.” Nanami couldn’t help himself, watching as your ass moved with every thrust into your pussy. All you could do was take it, Nanami’s hands preventing you from running. 

The room was filled with the sounds of sin: the slapping of skin, your desperate moans, and Nanami’s growls and grunts. He began to move faster, and you could feel his tip hit your cervix in the best way with every single thrust. “K-Kento! F-f-fuck!” “Is this all you wanted, darling? You being punished and fucked like the brat you are?” You nodded weakly, too enraptured by the feeling of his cock sliding in and out of you. You began to shake again and Nanami slapped your ass. “Go ahead, I know you want to. You’ve been begging for it all night. Cum.” Your body responded immediately and your orgasm slapped you in the face. Your hips couldn’t buck from his strong grip but the rest of you did, squirming on the desk while you coated his dick in white.  

Nanami didn’t give you a chance to rest, pulling out and quickly picking you up. He slid back in as he carried you over to a small sofa on the other side of his office. He bounced you up and down like you were a rag doll as he walked, kissing you feverishly and swallowing your moans until he laid your back down onto the cushions. Grabbing your legs, he put them over his shoulders, starting to thrust into your pussy again. The change in position left your head spinning, and deeper angle made your moans increase in pitch and volume. “Keep these pretty legs up here while I fuck you into submission,” Nanami growled, holding them as he pounded you. “G-od shit! Fuck! Y-yes, yes, y-yes Sir!” “Now look at that, she’s learning,” he smirked a little, letting your legs rest against his shoulders and leaning down to kiss you more. Your knees were damn near touching his ears and you couldn’t get enough. His hands tried to reach under your back to unclasp your bra, but he got impatient, instead ripping it through the middle and taking a tit into his hand to knead while he fucked and kissed you. 

Moans poured into Nanami’s mouth and he drank them like the sweetest wine he’d ever tasted. His dick started to hit your g-spot, and you couldn’t control the way you grew even louder. He was relentless against the sensitive area, and you started to whine. “I-I’m gonna! G-gonna c-cum!” That was the only warning you gave him as your pussy clenched and tightened around his cock rhythmically. “Oh? Is my good girl that sensitive?” Nanami reached his hand down from your breast to your clit and you started to squirm harder. He had you pinned with nowhere to go as you tried to handle the overstimulation. “T-too much! Please Kento!” “Too much? But I thought you wanted to cum?” He asked, voice breathy but still deep against your lips. He rubbed and fingers faster and harder and sped up his thrusting, and you felt like you could explode. His cock was covered in your cum. But he wanted more. He wanted to show you he could deny you, but he could also make you overindulge. “Give me another one. Now. Now brat, cum again.” 

Your body seemed to be running on autopilot, listening to his command the moment it left his lips. The intense pleasure made your eyes well up with tears and Nanami praised you over and over again. “Good, good girl, there we go, that’s what I wanted,” he moaned as he continued to thrust. He moved his hand and picked you up again all without pulling out once more. When he got to a wall, however, he did put you down, his dick slipping out of you as your weak legs held you up in front of him. “Against the wall.” “K-Kento I don’t think I can sta-” “I won’t let you fall. Hands against the wall, darling.” You turned around, putting your palms against the wall and jutting your ass out. Nanami took one hand and held your hip, easing himself back into you with a moan. He took the other and ran it up your neck, grabbing your hair almost from the scalp and pulling your head back as he began his fervent pace once more. You couldn’t hold back your moans, and your legs wanted to give out. He wrapped his arm around you to keep you steady. 

“That’s right. I’ve got you. All you have to do is fucking take it,” he groaned into your ear. “Y-ah! Yes Sir! K-Kento oh fuck! Oh fuck, oh fuck!” You were trying your hardest, but your words descended into gibberish and half-spoken curses. Nanami was beginning to lose his patience, his dick throbbing angrily inside of you from holding back his orgasm. But he needed one more out of you. He wanted to leave you shaking with ecstasy. “Take it, take it, take it,” he growled with each thrust, your mouth open as you began to slightly drool, hot, salty tears running down your face. The both of you were covered in sweat, and it just made the slapping sounds of his balls hitting your slit even louder. “This is your punishment,” he moaned, “Are you going to disobey me again?” “N-No!” He moved forward slightly so his mouth was right up against your ear. “Are you going to be a fucking brat or are you going to be my good girl?” 

Your vision was getting hazy. His dick was fucking you into oblivion and you gladly wanted to let it. “Answer me,” he growled, yanking your hair a bit harder. “Ah! G-good! I’ll b-be good Kento!” “Say it,” he panted, starting to feel himself get closer to release. “I-I’m a good g-girl!” “Again.” “G-god- fuck Kento pl-please!” “I said again!” “I’m a good g-girl! I’m y-your good girl K-Kento! Fuck I’m gonna c-cum please l-let me cum!” “Do it, darling. Cum for me.” The both of you came at the same time, and he held you as much as he could as he let his cum pour into you. “F-Fuck!”, he moaned loudly while his hand holding your hair moved to cover your mouth, knowing your screams would be extra loud. They were mixed with cries, the overstimulation leaving you weak. Your hips convulsed and he growled into your ear as it filled you up, his thrusts slowing down as the both of you rode it out. 

He gently pulled out of your spent pussy, keeping you upright as he finally untied your wrists. Tossing the garment away, he picked you up and held you close to his chest as he sat down on the sofa. You laid your head in the crook of his neck, your legs wrapped around his waist. “You did so well,” he whispered, stroking your back. The air grew silent then and you both basked in the afterglow of everything. The both of you cuddled for what felt like hours, eyes closed and heartbeats steady. “I really…am sorry,” you piped up, voice a low whisper. “Hm? Are you talking about the mission?” “Yes. I should’ve listened to you. I wasn’t quite ready yet.” “It’s alright. What matters is that you came back safe and sound,” he murmured, absently feeling a scar that ran up your back from the incident. The both of you grew silent once more, letting each other feel and touch each other's skin intimately in the process. “I can’t believe it really took you this long to figure it out.” “…I’m not sure how that information is relevant to the situation.” “Now look at who’s being a bad liar.” 

_______________________________________________________

pumped this one out in two days, it was super fun to write. hope you enjoyed it! <3 -leyley

[cherryredstars]

in simon's relationship struggles, you mentioned that he presents you with the ring and you hold out your hand and he slips it onto your finger without either of you saying a word... i love that idea as i am a quiet person myself. would you expand on that please? maybe some hcs about a quiet love shared between them?? sfw or nsfw (or both:)) up to you love your work so much <333

Pairing: Simon “Ghost” Riley x gn!reader

Warnings: Fluff

Summary: How you and Simon show your love without words. 

A/N: I smiled so wide seeing this request!! Thank you for loving my little blog!

Word Count: 770 (Not Edited)

It will forever be about the little things. Every detail and trait and action. It’s about the things that are magnified within the warm silence. It’s not a secretive love. A love that is shielded away from the eyes of others so it can be questioned. It’s the type of love that is so clear that there isn’t any question of its existence. 

Simon is so perceptive. He notices every micro-expression you have and the slightest changes in body language. He documents it in his mind, storing it for a later date even if it doesn’t seem important. It always comes in handy in some way or another. 

When he’s out on missions, far from home and missing you, he tends to imagine your reactions to everything. When he’s out in the towns, he’ll briefly pause outside the shop. He’ll remember the way you had slightly twitched your nose at the colors of a piece of clothing. How your eyes strayed onto something a few seconds longer than usual. Then he’ll walk away from the shop, remembering the name. He’ll be sure to return before he goes home.

He brings back trinkets for you. Always. And it is always something you fall in love with. The same details. He already knows what you would want. What would grace him with that fond smile as you cradle them in your hands. It’s all based on elimination. He’ll pick something up, examine every aspect of it and then go through his checklist of you. How you’ve reacted to similar things in the past and deciding from there if he should move on. He never misses.

In return, you do your little acts of service. Always making sure everything he loves is stocked in the house when he comes home. Has his tea brewing and the kettle going for his convenience. You have the spaces in the house prepared for him to place his things. You make the transition from military to civilian as smooth as possible. His heart warms when he goes to the kitchen at any hour of the day or night, huffing at the sink of dishes. But his body relaxes and the tiniest smile graces his face when he looks to the side and his mug is already in the drying rack waiting for him. 

He has never been more content than on the days he leaves for deployment. You will be dead asleep besides him, but it feels like you’re by his side the whole time he prepares to leave. In the kitchen, everything is laid out for him. The box of tea and the kettle and the to-go cup. A throw-away bag sitting in the fridge with a homemade meal for him to eat while he’s away. All the last minute things he grabs on the counter where he can’t miss it. 

Before he leaves, he makes sure you’re prepared for anything that might happen. He has carefully instructed papers for any situation. Step by step things followed with materials for reference. He makes sure nothing is broken or may be in need of a spruce up before he leaves to minimize your inconveniences. Makes sure the fireplace has wood to last months. Double checks the backup supply of water is filled to the top. Buys extra batteries for emergency flashlights and the back up generator. Makes sure the car has a spare and a filled gas canister that is safely stored away. He predicts any problems you may have and thinks of ways to reduce and prevent it. 

There are notes everywhere. You find them in drawers and in small spaces. In the obvious spots and the questionable ones. Inside pants pockets and coats. All have miscellaneous messages. Some paragraphs long and some with small drawings. It warms both of your hearts. You carry a note scratched out in Simon’s chicken scratch reading Why is there a bottle of water in the bathroom cabinet? Simon’s tactical vest has a crumpled and ripped hot pink sticky note that reads A magikarp can easily fuck you up <3 with the ugliest looking fish drawn under it.

The best form of your love is the quiet nights spent in each other’s company. Laying together with small brushes to each other’s skin. It burns into your hearts, and it’s nice to know that the two of you can just exist with each other. The kisses are slow and loving. The touches are lingering and full of yearning. When the two of you slide into bed, tucked against each other, you find it hard to think anything can exist outside of your love.

Simon has no idea what a “magikarp” is, and he has almost drunk micellar water before.

Join Cherry’s Discord Server

[hydrangeyes]

Missing you

So if you don't know, Yes this already existed, my old account was deleted (accident but I can tell I won't be getting it back), and am reposting my old x male reader works!

I don't know if I saved all of them but here is one that was saved to my AO3 account.

Edit: So shuffling through my docs It's been brought to my attention that wattpad (who I use as backup) Cut a lot of my fics in half??? anyway I'll be trying to fix that also

----------------------------------------------------------------------

Aizawa x Male reader

(Y/n just returned from an out-of-the-country mission. And well how can you blame him for immediately looking for his precious boyfriend?) unedited

+Fluff (✿◠‿◠) +

Height: 6'2

Gender: Male

Age: 32

personality: Impulsive, bubbly, kinda forgetful

Hair color: Hazelnut brown

Eye color: honey brown

body type: Lean but muscular, not bulky, soft

Quirk: ????

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Y/n has never run so fast in his life.

Y/n didn't really think through exactly what he was currently doing. That is breaking into his boyfriend of 4 years, workplace. Well sort of breaking, he had a copy of his mans' teacher id..... did that count?

How was he supposed to know they added extra security!? Hell why was all might chasing after him, they knew each other dammit!! Y/n conveniently forgot just how different he looked now, being both taller and muscular than when he last saw the prized hero.

Thinking quickly Y/n scrambles to the nearest door and dove inside without (once again) thinking it through.

Panting and wheezing a little, Y/n blink seeing a bunch of eyes now on him.

"Y-yo..." he stutters out to apparently a bunch of kids mid-training.

"Y/n? You idiot how did you get in here?" a familiar tired voice call out not far from y/n. Immediately forgetting where he was Y/n tackles the man with a delighted laugh.

"Shota!!"

Said man was previously sitting on the floor next to his students' belongings, leaning back on his rolled-up sleeping bag. Both him and y/n now a sprawl on the bag and floor.

"I'm so happy to see you, as soon as I got off the plane-"

"Y/N!"

Aizawa groans as y/n finally stop talking looking at him with his full attention. (Y/n: ≧◉◡◉≦??) "Maybe here isn't the place for this? my students..." he grumbles. Y/n blinks finally catching on and looks from their little bubble to see the students all gathered and watching with interest.

"a-ah, um sorry about interrupting kiddos." y/n coughs out realizing he did it again. Getting up and helping Aizawa he bows deeply before straightening and rubbing the back of his next. " Couldn't help rushing to see my sweetheart."

the burst of surprised outcries filled the gym and Aizawa winced as he sees Mina and Denki grab onto Y/n demanding answers. glancing over at the door he waves off a thoroughly confused all might wondering if he should end the class early. He could sneak off while they were distracted with Y/n.....

"So Mr. L/n what's Mr. Aizawa like outside of school?"

"hm? well I guess it depends! usually he's cuddly and - mftt?"

Y/n blinks looking down to see aizawa's scarf covering his mouth. looking back y/n chuckles nervously seeing aizawa glare at them. "That is none of their business, also you still have yet to answer my question. How did you get in?"

Y/n fully turns and giving him a kiss on the cheek, "Come on sweetheart, I wasn't going to say anything embarrassing..." Y/n inwardly let's out a breathe when that seems to calm the man down.

"I do have a copy of your old id card, it still works apparently." Y/n shrugs.

sighing and rubbing his temple, Aizawa waves at his students. "Class dismissed, I have to get the situation this idiot no doubt caused cleared up."

:One awkward mini teacher meeting later:

Y/n pouts from where he is sitting on the couch. He wasn't exactly in trouble but he was told off once things were cleared. Now here he was in aizawa's dorm apartment, which was confusing they had a place already, waiting for his sweetheart to finish showering.

"oh peaches, It's not a crime to love someone too much right?" y/n dramatically coos to a black cat that comes to him sniffing his leg curiously. their collar pendant engraved with 'peachs <3'.

"In your case, no."

Smiling softly y/n looks back to see Aizawa drying his hair wearing black sweatpants and a long sleeve grey shirt. "Mmh good, I don't think I could stop." y/n teases. Aizawa rolls his eyes and comes around to sit next to him.

Laying back on the couch arms, Y/n tugs him to lay on top. "I've missed you."

Aizawa chuckles softly and gives him a kiss.

"I've missed you too."

------------------------------

short but felt like this would be a fun start to this book. I should say that the UA whenever I write about it or our beloved characters are in a college setting (U.A being the college). As well as characters being OOC canon-wise because of this.

anyway, Thanks cupcakekiller for the request!!

[letters-of-libertas]

I'm bi and yeah your note on women not having solidarity seems sadly true. Apart from not dating men would there be anything you would suggest to improve ones life apart from stating away from those women if possible?

I love this question because this is how to start thinking: being practical.

What it takes to "improve ones life" is subjective so with that said firstly define what a better life(style) for yourself away from moids would look like. Temporarily mentally remove xy terrorist existence. What would your habits/routine be? What would you work towards & pour your energy into? What would you want to be? What would you center your life around? Take your time with these questions or anymore that come up. Have a general idea then be more specific and start breaking your life down into sectors/sections/areas, then look at where you want to be in those areas and work towards it.

For example; I divide my life into 6-7 aspects:

Physical Strength - Not just about muscle but knowing how to fight, where to hit and when to fight. Being stronger makes it easier to defend yourself in altercations (especially with other women). Some mfs will try you & you cant always rely on others coming to your rescue. Also work on building stamina to help endurance, and keeping as healthy as possible.

Emotional Strength - If you cant control your emotions they will control you. In a world of chaos being emotionally strong will let you cut through the noise and focus on what truly matters. Building emotional strength is not easy but it's worth it. Being able to rise above immediate reactions and pace yourself will allow you to assess situations more rationally & make more beneficial choices.

Finances - Get your bag up. Having money to gain resources is imperative to quality of life. I dont care what anyone says having a certain amount of money in life WILL make you happier as you're able to meet your needs better. Having more money/resources also makes it easier to support other women should you choose to do so, it also allows you to be more influential and have more control over your life. However, dont become a slave to getting money tho because that's how you get scammed.

Network - The type of people you hang around can make or break who you are as a person. Aim to connect with likeminded women who will encourage & inspire you as you go on this journey. Hang around people that value & will be honest with you while giving you grace. Not all women you engage with have to be single & childfree but beware the moid crazy ones because they will bring danger to you in their quest for maIe validation. Life isn't perfect but you cant go wrong having the right people around you, valuable relationships are hard to find but it goes a long way even if it's just online. However, no company > bad company.

Spirituality/Guide - Having something bigger than yourself to guide you through the chaos in this world can offer guidance/purpose that keeps you grounded & focused. For many people generally this is religion/god. Not everyone needs or ascribes to religion/spirituality though, but at least consider sets of morals/beliefs to follow. However even that isn't for everyone. So if you feel better off without spirituality or a 'higher' guide at least be clear on it & your reasons why (for yourself).

Hobbies & Interests - As turbulent as the world is, find things to enjoy amidst the chaos. Constant work, doom, and gloom will not change anything you will only hurt yourself. Take time to indulge in things that make you happy to recharge & relax. Engage in hobbies that serve you, share your passion with other women & hear theirs out too. It goes a long way in terms of mental health.

Security - It takes privilege to decide to not get married or have children as a woman & live it out. Everyone's situation is different so what I'll generally suggest is to constantly look into how you can protect yourself, have backup methods, and stay in the loop of xy predation. Dont drown in it but moids are predators & being completely blind to them is being blind to danger. Elaborated on point 10 here.

Sounds like a lot? Great, it'll keep you busy because this isn't a vacation or destination but a lifestyle. And to be honest, some of y'all can do with the busyness as it'll let you focus on what actually matters. This not to say to overwhelm yourself in things for the sake of it but to prioritise your energy on effective things for your life. As you focus on building you'll find that you have less energy to care about insignificant stuff or stuff out of your control anyways. For example, Instead of getting wound up about user somerandomadjectivefem stirring discourse calling you an extremist or whining about how impossible it is for her & other women to live without romantic love n' whatnot (or even women irl pulling this crap), you either ignore or quickly shut down the conversation & swiftly move on.

Everything I've mentioned are just examples, you may feel differently do whatever you feel best applies. Also remember to enjoy the process along the way as you are living through it afterall :3

Long story short: Work on building resources & other aspects of your life up for yourself.

[taigasrandomshit]

i don't know how to explain this, but a Very Bad Thing Happened.

the door knocked about 8:30 in the morning. cops. lots of cops. and a search warrant. and three vans from the state police digital forensics lab. they tore my apartment up and took every piece of electronics they found.

someone was on our wifi downloading very illegal things, and now my sons and i are on the line for it.

there were like twenty cops. they all had GUNS. some had TWO GUNS. and they all had BACKUP AMMO. and i don't know about you, but cops swarming my house carrying deadly weapons scares the shit out of me.

when i figure out who is responsible, i will have a strong reaction.

i have a long receipt for everything they took, which i MAY or MAY NOT receive back. IF i get everything back, it won't be for at least four (4) months. after they run all the analysis and whatnot.

items taken included all cell phones, laptops, desktops, and any thumb drives they happened to find laying around. they even took two old huge cpu's i had buried in the closet. so i'm in a fucking situation right now. this is only being sent via an old laptop of my sister's.

they didn't let me save any phone numbers or appointments from my phone, so there's some people who are going to think i died or something. i can't access my email, bc none of the passwords i remember actually work, and where is my recovery link sent to? MY PHONE. i can't recover passwords on some other sites, bc they are sent to MY EMAIL, which i can't recover, bc i need MY PHONE.

and they were all so fucking polite. this is just another day for them. they appreciated me not screaming and making a scene. i appreciated they didn't beat the shit out of me and steal my cash.

i could rant on forever, i may never be not angry again, and i feel the most violated i have ever felt in my 44 years on this plane of existence.

ALSO IF YOU TAKE AWAY ONE THING FROM THIS PLEASE CHANGE YOUR WIFI PASSWORD REGULARLY.

[fatuismooches]

so i was thinking back to that post about pantalone getting the receipt of all the things dottore buys for fragile!reader. imagine pantalone, columbina, and maybe signora making elaborate plans to find out why on earth is dottore buying romance novels and tcg cards. their plans get increasingly ridiculous and the segments find it funny to see some of the most powerful people in teyvat kneeling on the ground and huddled up together, only the tops of their heads visible from behind the windows(or counter) of the lab. and when reader finds them while they're on their daily walk reader is all oh hey there :D

YESSSSS ily anon!! You know Pantalone would definitely get the others in on this... he is SELLING this story to them and gathering as much backup as he can (namely Columbina... I also hc she likes to make fun of Dottore lol) You can bet they are reading those romance novels to tease Dottore about later on lol (bina def recommends you some though)

The clones are having a field day with this whole situation. They can't blame the Harbingers though, you are so interesting and lovely... who wouldn't want to know you? Well, clearly their creator has a huge problem with the rest of the Fatui even knowing about their existence. He is adamant about them not speaking to you. Probably a mixture of it'll be a headache for him to deal with them *cough endless questions and teasing* and he's unsure if it'll cause stress to your health.

Dottore's lab is hella huge so on days you feel like being alone, you tend to go a good distance away from the center. So one day you see a few figures in the lab that you can't recognize you immediately get a bit on guard... and then you realize those are Dottore's co-workers, as he calls them. You sometimes caught a glimpse of them from far away, and Dottore always looked like was at this wit's end with them. Understandably you are rather excited to have some interaction with anyone that's not Dottore... and the Harbingers are just like 🧍‍♀️ when you start prattling on with them so causally

The funny part is that a while ago I began working on a fic with this same concept, called "The Doctor's Beloved" and I can say I have a lot of brainrot from it😭

Snippets from the fic:

The Fatui Harbingers were gathered together for a very important meeting. At least, that was what the ones who had bothered to come thought. Instead, they were greeted with that familiar, infuriating smile of the Ninth Harbinger.

“I, Pantalone, call this Fatui meeting to order.”

--

Columbina spoke up, draped over Arlecchino’s shoulder. “Ah~, I’ve seen them before. But I can never get a good glimpse of their face… they always cover their face with a veil, just like how the doctor never takes his mask off. I wonder how they look…”

“Dottore’s actually spending research funds on this [Name]?” Childe gaped. “That crazy guy hardly ever thinks about anything else besides his beloved research.”

“Perhaps there is a person who shares that spot with him,” a new voice joined the conversation. Pulcinella had now entered the room.

--

“I mean what I said.”

“So you’re saying that…” one voice began.

“This [Name] person…” another continued.

“Is Dottore’s lover?!” an exclamation echoed from a few throughout the room.

[finnitesimal]

Ordem Paranormal Quarantena fucking knocked it out of the park it was insane Im grappling with so much I'm so insanely tired

There was a funny bit I was thinking of around the whole second bit where I was going Carol you hallmark protagonist fuck

Because first of all her name. that was the main part it's on the same level as Noel and Nick and Holly but there were also certain aspects of her character that in my delirious mind reminded me of the hypocrisy and drama of the typical independent business lady in a christmas movie as well as the I-can-do-no-wrong mindset of a romantic fantasy shoujo romance protagonist

And I thought. Man. There was a very clear path this story couldve taken with these characters and setting if it were not roleplay.

(note: not talking about the ccs or the actual characters but the Tropes the characters fall into and Could've been in generic science fiction horror)

A plucky new scientist with dreams to make a difference in an evil monster-ridden world and prove her skills despite being underestimated and looked down on by her friends and colleagues, and her direct senior with whom she has a negative relationship with due to his demonstrated lack of practical skill but mysterious higher connections to the board and therefore is ranked higher while she falls behind. She has moments of butting heads with him before the disaster breaks out in the facility and she has to struggle to stay alive and hidden until she's rescued by that same suddenly impressive senior with whom there's multiple tight spaces to be stuck with and convenient makeovers and sudden cold they have to share body warmth for. It's overWhelmingly easy to guess the plot

The plot in which None of the gang are mentioned. Because in this hypothetical B-list horror romance, they don't exist as people, but plot devices and tropes

They're there to provide funny moments and emotional weight as well as conflict to the overdone plot.

You have Luis, tank, everyman strongman with a soft heart and unclear but dangerous living conditions (poor). Probably the backup boyfriend in case the thing with Mikael doesn't work out, ends up sacrificing his life to save her due to some completely preventable situation cause she was too stubborn to listen, and gets a future project (maybe even a baby) named after him.

You have Jeffrey, funnyman, scapegoat, coward with zero friends and terrible priorities, multiple jobs (poor). Kind of useless, constantly infuriating and taking up space and meddling with things he doesn't know Anything about when she could've made a solution if he'd handed it over and dies to the zombies for the crime of irritating our protag.

Diego, hippie allegory, lives out of his backpack he literally calls his home, his life (poor) and has herbs (weedhead) that she'd try to be Fixing and eventually succeed in 'reforming' and sending him back to school due to her natural disposition in helping those in need.

You have Lucie, finally another girl, unfortunately in both horror and tropey romance, we Hate any other woman besides our all-powerful and beloved protagonist, so she's the nerd archetype but not the cute, efficient way our protag is nerdy but in the weirdo unnecessarily jargon-filled and Unappealing (unattractive) way. She dies the same way in the movie.

Benito was Made to be hated. It's the sly evil smirk and sunglasses and a beanie with the unprofessional labcoat and talking about things he doesn't understand like he does and taking her accomplishments and mocking her life as a scientist fighting to save the world and how he always seems to be looking down at her and definitely wouldve been the one to hide an infection and endanger the group he's the character whose death you're Meant to starting cheering for when he's dragged kicking and screaming onto the rusty laden, jagged roof and played with and pounced on till his insides squeeze out of him like toothpaste

Mattias was there so our protagonist could have her badass "I'm not like you I won't take a life because you're a coward" speech before he turns and nearly gets the group

Emi and Anderson were there so we could have a real man-to-man fatherly conversation about what it means to protect the ones you love and to pass on the torch as 'Leader' before he succumbs to the virus and begs to die before he hurts his girl, and so they could have wholesome pseudo-parenthood with a confused but reasonable child who absolutely understands that they're doing the right thing because they're the good guys and calls Carol mom when she's in danger near the end

It could've been a zombie survival plot about two arguably well-off individuals facing the consequences of a project they still believe could change the world and their tag-along group of meatshields to throw at the problem until their glorious melancholy escape where they're hailed as heroes for containing and eventually completing their groundbreaking research

and a horrific experience for a group of people who just wanted to make an easy few bucks till the next paycheck. They could've split those 50 dolalrs and jumped each other in the parking lot they didn't need to go through all that

Carol is driven, she's serious, she's ambitious and believes in the good that her research (the team's research) will bring and she's surrounded by people who don't understand that they're the good guys and are trying to find fault in her So she's willing to make sacrifices so she's willing to take it upon herself to decide who the team needs more she doesn't care if she dies as long as the world knows she saved it she needs to hear anything and everything people say in case it's about her or something she might care about it she's got braided hair and easily breakable glasses

Mikael is keeping things to himself to preserve his level of control over the situation because who knows what these guys are really like and he Saved them by telling them everything they need to know and they repay him by chopping his arm off? they're ungrateful and unserious So he kept himself safe while they had numbers and clues on their side They Managed Didn't They? Aren't they alive right now? they don't understand how important it is that he lives no one understands how important it is that Nidere lives he's got stylish curly hair and a fitted turtleneck

They both have a need to be heroes in a sense, to matter in the grand scheme of things they need to be at the forefront they need to be the ones who saved Everyone. Everybody is Only Alive because of THEM.

It's just really fascinating to me how. A different perspective of things kind of switches their roles as protagonists and cannon fodder

[ikamigami]

Why Sun doesn't always mean our Eclipse - the Dorito Bot - when he's talking about Eclipse?

The deep dive into Sun's mind and the way his delusions work (supported by my own experiences and research on that topic).

It's my meta analysis of Sun's mental disorder. I'll try to explain why I think that this is a highly possible explanation of Sun's very complicated relationship with Eclipse.

I was thinking about this for quite some time. I always knew that Sun's relationship with Eclipse is very complicated, very complex. I've seen a lots of takes about how Eclipse sees Sun and how looks his relationship with Sun. But whenever it came to Sun and how he sees Eclipse and how looks his relationship with Eclipse.. it wasn't that. I wasn't sure why but something was missing in people's interpretations.

Now I know what it is. Many people misinterprets Sun's view on things because of misunderstanding of his mental issues. Same was with how I was misinterpreting Eclipse at first. I didn't understand Eclipse's mental issues.

I explained in many of my posts that I think that Sun has depressive psychosis and his delusions are centered around guilt and unworthiness. Sun most definitely hallucinated a voice who was saying demeaning things to him and was trying to guide Sun through his life, reminding him that he's evil.

What if I told you that Sun was unaware of Eclipse's existence as our Eclipse - Dorito Bot? Sounds crazy, right?

I think that's because Eclipse introduced himself in a really really wrong way. When Sun met Eclipse for the first time (remember he also heard him for the first time then) he didn't recognize him as our Eclipse. For Sun it was more like "so that's how that voice I'm hearing looks like" type of situation.

So for Sun there are two Eclipses. There's Eclipse - our Dorito Bot and there's Eclipse - the figment of Sun's mind, the entity that Sun hallucinates. But I think that for a long time Sun couldn't differentiate between the two. Why? Again, it's because I think that our Eclipse had the same voice and he was saying the same things that the voice was saying to Sun.

The Eclipse from Sun's mind, let's call him Sun's Eclipse or "Eclipse", is also Sun. It's true Sun. I mean in Sun's delusional mind this voice is him. It might be hard to understand but it's something like in Ren's song - Hi Ren:

"You think that you can amputate me?

I am you, you are me, you are I, I am we

We are one, split in two that makes one, so you see

You got to kill you if you wanna kill me

I'm not left over dinner, I'm not scraps on the side..."

These lyrics capture the best what I'm talking about here.

And to back up the statement about Sun viewing Eclipse as the physical manifestation of the voice in his head, I'll tell you that when I watched "Sun meets Eclipse" episode I felt nauseous.

I'm serious. For me their meeting felt like all those times when the voice was speaking to me. So when I saw that episode, my anxiety skyrocketed and my insides were flipping and I was sweating cold. It was crazy. That episode was insane to me and I wouldn't be surprised if Sun just thought that the voice he's hearing is real. I mean even more real than it already was.

Sun viewing Eclipse as the voice in his head explains why he told Moon that Moon isn't like Eclipse and why Sun thinks Eclipse is worse than Moon. Because Sun's Eclipse is an awful monster. Moon was trying to change. Sun's Eclipse would never.

Sun still tried to be nice to Eclipse and help him though. He felt bad when he had to expell him out of his own head. After that everything changed. Sun's mental state worsened.

I'm certain that Sun still could hear "Eclipse". And upon seeing Moon exhausting himself with searching for Eclipse's backups, Sun was feeling more and more awful. After all, he was the one to blame for this situation. He didn't get rid of "Eclipse". The "Eclipse" returned. But this time it was worse. Because "Eclipse" wasn't trapped in his head anymore. Now "Eclipse" could cause even more damage.

Sun was depressed even before October takeover but it only got worse with him sinking deeper into his delusions. He was a failure. He was unable to help with anything. He caused all their problems and yet the one who was endangering himself was Moon even though it should've been Sun.

With things getting progressively worse, Sun was scarying Lunar while playing games and he destroyed Moon's computer which caused Moon's kill code to reactivate and their father was giving them more headache, Sun's mental state kept worsening till he reached the breaking point.

During Sun's late development of psychotic episode Bloodmoon appeared in the Daycare looking like Moon. Many people were shocked that Sun shot them while they were looking like Moon but not many realized that Bloodmoon's words triggered Sun's PTSD. I think that when Sun shot Bloodmoon he didn't see Moon. He saw "Eclipse". The same "Eclipse" he expelled from his head. Bloodmoon said almost exactly the same words that Eclipse told Sun back then.

Not long before that happened Sun was repeating to himself that he isn't like him after he said that maybe they should kill their enemies. These were his intrusive thoughts but for Sun, he was turning into "Eclipse". And after he killed Bloodmoon, he realized that he's just like him. After that point Sun completely slipped into a firm grip of his delusions.

He had to kill "Eclipse". It was a suicidal mission. Sun didn't plan to get back to the Daycare. He had to make sure that all "Eclipses" including himself will be dead. And also that's why he was willing to kill Solar Flare. Because "Eclipse" built him thus means "Eclipse" is still alive.

Eclipse wasn't aware how much power he had over Sun at that moment. When he grabbed the sword, Sun immediately lost his confidence. Sun was always afraid of "Eclipse" so when he lost so quickly, he was unable to fight back anymore. He burst with magic only because he was in highetened emotional state triggered by Eclipse's words that Moon wouldn't care if he killed Sun and by reminiscence of hallucination of Bloodmoon's taunting words at Beta 10.

The scene that is a more solid proof that Sun hallucinated "Eclipse" was a moment at the end of the episode "Sun is trapped by Moon". We could hear Sun saying while looking at his own reflection "you're pretty pathetic, aren't you". We know that it was Sun speaking but he sounded like Eclipse in that moment. I think that it was intentional. I immediately thought that maybe Sun saw Eclipse in the reflection because it's quite common for those who hallucinates to talk with their own reflection because they see there someone else.

The clue that Sun view himself as "Eclipse" was that scene when he told Moon that he doesn't know anything about Sun and that Sun isn't a hero. Sun was "Eclipse" then. He was a monster. That's why he said that Bloodmoon's death didn't affect him. Because "Eclipse" doesn't have remorse. Sun doesn't have remorse because Sun is "Eclipse".

After Sun blew up Moon's mana pool he listened to Eclipse because "Eclipse" always know better than Sun. Sun is the one who ruins everything. "Eclipse" is there to help him. Later when Sun recalled those memories he said that he tried to kill Eclipse with magic blast. He remembers it like that because he remembers that he went on a mission to kill "Eclipse".

If it wasn't for Earth finding him in the forest and calming him down, Sun would most probably either kill himself or harm himself badly.

Later upon feeling guilty at what he did, Sun learned that Old Moon is indeed gone, he heard his last message, he learned that Lunar was blown up and that Eclipse got the star. It made Sun feel even more guilty. And because he had to help New Moon and Earth to adjust to their new lives, he pushed away his grief. Sun in order to prevent himself from seeing hallucinations was overworking himself.

Sun's mental state worsened even more to the point that he became passively suicidal and when opportunity arised he decided to become conduit for star's power. This is how Sun planned to end his own life. And he would also help with getting rid of "Eclipse" which made Sun feel better about killing himself. He would get rid of all "Eclipses" for good.

Though when Sun heard that star's power is slowly killing Eclipse, I'm sure he felt conflicted. Because when he popped off at Eclipse he felt bad after that and was seemingly concerned about what is happening with Eclipse because the latter wasn't showing up for quite awhile. And that's why I think that Sun was willing to listen to Eclipse. Remember Sun isn't a murderer. He despises killing. Unfortunately, Eclipse being Eclipse, threatening Earth and saying demeaning things to both Sun and Earth and telling them to kill Lunar, triggered Sun. He was seeing "Eclipse" again. He wasn't talking with Eclipse anymore. It was "Eclipse" all over again.

After time had passed we could see Sun's guilt wearing him down. He killed once again. He was visibly tired of killing. He tried to stop Moon from killing every person that they felt uncomfortable around - Forkface and Mimic. Sun starts to ask himself about Eclipse's existence while questioning his own. He's still passively suicidal.

Though Lunar got revived and a little bit later Solar joined them and Ruin didn't seem as a threat that much. It seemed that things got slightly better. Not for long because Ruin built New Bloodmoon. From that point things started getting worse pretty quickly. Bloodmoon attacked Lunar and Ruin was planning something big. Sun was worried with how Moon was letting his anger to overtake him. Ruin together with Bloodmoon blew up the Daycare and Sun and Moon were sendt to Ruin's dimension for whole October.

Sun didn't have that much time to think too much about everything because they had to stay safe and get a way back to their dimension. Though he wasn't free from worry. He was scared that Moon won't wake up twice during their time in Ruin's dimension. It gave him PTSD and he was afraid that Moon could've been dead.

After some pleas Moon agreed that Sun will take the cure for ruin virus from Ruin's creator's laboratory. They were able to come back to the Daycare safely and they gave Ruin the cure. Things started to seemingly calm down. Solar rebuilt the Daycare. Ruin was now good. It didn't last long because Bloodmoon returned and killed Earth. They decided to hunt them down.

Unfortunately Moon and Solar made bad decision by forcing Sun to go on a hunt for Bloodmoon. Gladly they heard Sun out and let him try to give BM a chance. BM refused Sun's offer and then Sun learned that BM was actually behind July 16th incident, not Eclipse. Earth later told Sun and Moon that maybe Eclipse could've been redeemed because he seemed to be changing.

Later things seemed to get better. Though the problems kept stucking. The boys learned from Lunar about his powers and that Astral Bodies are observing them and if Lunar won't control their powers, he'll get killed. They were also warned to not use star's power because they also could get killed for that. And SW kidnapped Earth and threatened Sun and Moon to stay away from his business. They found out that Earth has some program which erases her memories about her father being evil.

Sun's mental state kept worsening but now he was lying and saying that he was doing okay. Because others had more important issues on their plates.

After Christmas Eclipse announced his return and threatened them that he'll kill them. Moon became more paranoid and aggressive which was scarying Sun. Thankfully Solar was there to stop Moon from making rush and dangerous decisions.

Sun went to therapy session with Earth and told her how Eclipse's return was stressing him out. While I think that he wasn't telling the whole truth, there was some truth to it. I think that Solar's presence was helping Sun with seeing Eclipse differently. And I think that it was then when Sun realized that Eclipse isn't the same as "Eclipse". But Eclipse's return and the way he was talking and acting, yet again triggered Sun. He saw "Eclipse" once again.

Later Sun and Moon were searching for Eclipse. Sun's words about killing Eclipse and creator are callback from the time when Sun said that they should kill their enemies. In both cases they were Sun's intrusive thoughts but for Sun it isn't like that. That's why both times Sun called himself stupid because he knows that this is bad. This time is different though because Sun promised himself that he needs to be stronger. In order to prevent the repeat of events from last year, he decided to not engage in anything and he left things for Moon and Solar.

Seeing how he blew up at Catnap shows us that sitting and waiting for others to resolve things makes things worse. We can still see signs that Sun is suicidal. He keeps making weird comments and told a suicide joke to Catnap.

Up to this point Ruin was able to trap Eclipse and Moon gave Eclipse a chance but he had to agree on the deal. Now they were searching on who brought Eclipse back together with Eclipse.

But let's focus on the conversation Sun and Moon had with Eclipse. Sun seemed nervous maybe even scared. He was unable to look at Eclipse. And he constantly repeats that he wants Eclipse dead. It doesn't make sense with how guilty Sun seemed before Eclipse returned and how he told Solar that he's making him feel better about Eclipse.

That's because Sun doesn't want to kill Eclipse. He blames himself for how Eclipse turned out to be. But I think the way Eclipse talks and behaves, trigger Sun's delusional mind and he's unable to differentiate between Eclipse and "Eclipse". He wants "Eclipse" dead. Not Eclipse. He said that he wanted to save Eclipse at first. But he wasn't talking about Eclipse. He's talking about "Eclipse" who is him so he's actually talking about himself.

In order to prevent himself from hurting others, he needs to take out the root of the problem which is "Eclipse" - the true Sun. He wants to kill himself. After all, he said that the worst thing that happened to him is that someone showed up in his head and that they came back even if Sun got rid of him. Over and over again. I think that Sun was talking about "Eclipse". He's tired of being evil and constantly ruining everything and making everything worse and hurting others.

Important thing to note is that Sun turns off every mirror in their house because he can't look at his own reflection because he doesn't want to see "Eclipse". He tries to distract himself by playing games, sitting at computer all day or spending some time with others so he won't hear "Eclipse" anymore. But it isn't enough so now he drinks his stress away hoping that maybe it'll muffle "Eclipse's" voice. But it won't help in the long run. Sun can't run away from his mental issues forever.

On lighter note I think that Sun may try to reach out to Eclipse encouraged by Solar's presence and companionship. It seems that Solar helped Sun a lot when it comes to Eclipse. Unfortunately because others are unaware of Sun's mental disorder it only helped a little because now Sun is more than sure that the "Eclipse" he wants to kill it's he, himself. I'm betting that Sun will try to apologize to Eclipse.

But to be honest I doubt that Eclipse will accept Sun's apology and take his offer of help. It's completely understandable. He has valid reasons to not trust Sun and to not want to have anything to do with him. Though I'm afraid that it'll cement in Sun that he's unable to fix what he messed up. We could see that with Bloodmoon and it'll probably be the same with Eclipse.

And with high possibilty that others will be able to resolve the problems without Sun's help, it might be a final push for Sun to end his own life. To finally get rid of "Eclipse".

I think that we're heading to ending of this arc soon and then we shall see how things will turn out to be.

I hope that all of this was somewhat coherent and makes sense. I tried my best to explain why I think that for Sun there are two Eclipses and why Sun thought for a long time that our Eclipse was "Eclipse" - Sun's hallucination, the voice from his head.

Also I hope that I didn't make too many mistakes.

[donkeys-waffles]

Okay, listen I'm not all that convinced AFO is completely gone. And let's put DFO aside for a moment. His and Yoichi's story feels uncomplete, there are certain elements that were given the time to be graced on but never really elaborated on. Like for example, that possibility that certain elements of AFO's backstory were fabricated to accomplish a certain message.

It's very easy to read over his backstory and gather the idea that he was born evil. But after a deeper look, it's very clear that was the purpose. We are meant to believe AFO is evil because that's what he wants us to believe, that's what he sees in himself. I feel bittersweet towards his supposed 'end'. Because I hate how Bakugou delivered that end, for one. But on one hand I enjoy how he mentioned needing Yoichi, it starts with denial and ends with recognition. And even if this a hot take, I think it's a beautiful, emotional end to such a messed-up individual.

However, I have a weird feeling about two things. First, I'd like to say, one thing I've noticed in writing is if something is brought up randomly, it'll generally come back to bite you later. Nothing is left unsaid, otherwise you have plot holes.

I found it interesting how it's mentioned AFO wasn't able to use his last trick up his sleeve, without any elaboration as to what that would have been. And I would say this was done on purpose, maybe just used as another example of every dream he wasn't able to accomplish before he died. But bringing light to this does nothing to strengthen the impact of his death on the narrative. Another interesting detail was Yoichi's wish. His dream of AFO being the kindest quirk in the world, which I can see being used to cause a reaction in the reader, as if trying to make them feel some heartache for such a bastard. But even with that reasoning, that sentence in the end feels so empty. unfulfilling, and almost lack-luster. It seems odd to be brought up and this could be bias, but I feel like that sentence had more importance than just literary cannon fodder.

We know AFO's main goal, make everyone love him like Yoichi, and his midterm goal was to steal his brother back through OFA. Makes sense.

But I still have questions. I understand why he took Tomura, to get a strong enough host to steal OFA, makes sense. But how does leaving Gigantomachia in the mountains have anything to do with such a goal? For what? Retirement? What did that achieve, wouldn't it better if he kept him around? If he was planning on moving his consciousness to Tomua later, then keeping him around would be better, right? Afterall, he'd be able to meet the child and possibly have a better understanding of the situation. Gigantomachia is an incredibly strong asset (look how he took down SO many heroes in the first war); he could have possibly even used him as backup during his fight with All Might.

And why keep OFA at a distance when his entire goal is to steal said quirk? I'm referring to that one panel in Vigilantes. Thats the entire opposite of his entire 200-year-old goal.

And that whole thing with his copy of rewind... This man is 200 years old, with an extremely strong villain empire, who has earned the respect of a genius scientist... You don't achieve any of those things by being stupid. And now I'm not normally one for completely trusting the MHA Wiki, but I can't blame them for giving him a 6/5 intelligence. He's a genius, and is spectacular with quirk analysis, it's his thing ya feel me. But it does show his lack of self-preservation, which is against what he's supposed to be angry at All Might for.

All Might took his health and his empire; we know he didn't really care about his empire as much from Spinner. (I mean lack of self-preservation because he's using a quirk that will eventually rewind him out of existence, whether he transfers his quirk to Tomura entirely or not. There's a possibility that it won't work, he failed to take complete control the first time remember. Is that what this supposed 'trick up his sleeve' was supposed to remedy? This is the same man that gave himself immortality, the same man that ran away from All Might for years, the same man that has shown to rely on the strength of others instead of dealing wounds himself. And might I add the same man that is supposed to be angry about his health being diminished. Afterall if not his health or his empire what could he possibly be angry at All Might for that's so special, so unique compared to his predecessors?)

This brings me to my last point. Since when the hell did this bitch care about THE CHILDREN! This man literally stole quirks from children, killed thousands, and turned a crap tone into braindead nomu. And he's angry on behalf of the children. Are we ever going to get an explanation for that?

Like I would understand if he killed the children that he apparently gave heroic ideals to. Like Ha! You will pay for passing on your ideals to children by watching me steal their quirks and kill them. But that's not what he means, or he would've stolen Tokoyami's quirk, killed Jiro instead of leaving her with a broken eardrum, and blasted Izuku away with deadly force instead of holding back in the first war. We have no answers for such behavior from a man known for exhibiting zero humanity (and making that behavior his ENTIRE personality.) Need I remind you this man stole Tomura (possibly gave him the quirk that killed his entire family,) and groomed him just to possess him later alright. He also turned Tsubasa into a nomu for shits and giggles, which we have never talked about once! Tsubasa, need I remind, was a small child and was the Doctor's grandson (which you'd think give him immunity to this kind of sick shit but apparently not.)

There are so many questions left unanswered, many of which Yoichi himself can't even answer. Like with all their human experimentation they do on a daily basis, the clone theory wouldn't really surprise me. It would make a lot of sense for his character as well. And even if that theory doesn't pan out, the vestige behind the locked door (which is entirely separate rant honestly,) or even Tomura's AFO vestige maybe. Though I feel if Izuku really saves Tomura in this war, then we might never hear much of anything from that vestige. Especially since their first priority would be to cancel it out as soon as possible. A lot of people bring up how the story is almost over, and they are probably right. But the end date was supposed to be 2022 originally, right? Then it was moved to 2023, now it's 2024-2025. Like yeah it is almost over, but there's still story that needs wrapping up clearly because that deadline has been pushed back multiple times. Too many times to make it a valid counterclaim anymore. Either way, I don't think we are in the clear of the Demon King's superiority complex anytime soon.

[hadesknockedupintheunderworld]

Imagine the Tails Polycule in the death of the sonic the hedgehog game.

Oooh interesting

So, I'm going to interpret as if they (prime!polycule I assume) were inserted into the game to join the main cast, and I'll start with placement first

(Game spoilers ahead)

Shadow, Knuckles, and Sonic all start out being the only person in their respective cars (not including the conductor in this). Since we have 3 foxes to place, I think it's best to just spread them out among these 3 cars (the Saloon, the lounge car, and the conductor's car)

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My decided placements are as follows:

Sails – the Saloon car with Knuckles

Nine - the lounge car with Shadow

Mangey - the conductor's car with Sonic and the Conductor

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And with that, the following are their roles and brief backstories (to fit with the theme of the murder mystery party):

Sails – Bartender

He's a bartender at the Saloon the town sheriff (Knuckles) frequents. He doesn't particularly have the passion for bartending, but it’s due to his (now passed) elderly boss's getting him this job that saved him from a worse life, so he can't complain too much. His real passion lies in his contraption making, which only his coworkers and the Sheriff knows about. While he tries to be decent at his job and maintan a friendly exterior for the customers, you can occasionally spot him leaning over the bar counter with a bored look on his face. He also enjoys a good riddle.

Nine – Programmer

The programer is married to his job (developing new robots that exist to help vulnerable people). After he happened to win an all expenses paid vacation in the lottery, his boss forced him out of the office to take the vacation in question, and he reluctantly complied. He has a hard time sitting still and relaxing, which results in him often working on something when not on the clock. Because of this, he took his Bits with him on vacation to tinker with. He doesn't like it when his work is interrupted and can be a bit prickly, but he can't suppress his excitement or interest in machines or programs he's never seen. Coincidentally, the only person on the train he recognizes is the locksmith (Shadow), who he shares a bit of a bitter (or bittersweet?) past with.

Mangey – Co-captain

He met the captain (Sonic) in college and the two have been attached at the hip since. While easily mistaken as Captain and assistant (since the co-captain often runs errands for or assists the captain), in truth the co-captain functions both as backup and a support partner. Should the captain have complications, it's up to the co-captain to step into his role, and if the captain needs to make a hard decision or needs assistance with something difficult, the co-captain is who he asks first. They are partners who rely on each other, and good friends.

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Now, for the game itself, each of the main characters had a set of movements, other people they talked to, and things they did, so these three would be no different.

At this point I actually started plotting out the movements of each of our 3 additional characters and how they shift the story and add to it. However, once I'd done enough work I'd realized I'd come out of this ask with a full blown au rather than just passing thoughts. As such, so as not to spoil a bunch of major moments in an au I may seriously end up writing for and showing off, I've decided instead to finish off this ask with some notes and tidbits about the au.

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Misc Notes:

Nine's Bits are based upon these little guys from Archie Sonic from Silver's future (post sgw):

I couldn't think up a better name and "the bits" is still classic to me, so I made up a random lore reason why they'd be called that in this au. Answer? Professor Von Schlemmer exists in Silver's future in this au, and either Silver accidentally brought some bits back with him once or ended up showing Tails or Nine some of his work. So Nine ended up taking the basic idea from the professor's bits to create his own. Since this is a bit more of a careful situation and Nine isn’t in the business of passing others' ideas off as his own, until he comes up with another name and makes them sufficiently different, his bits are a semi-secret not so secret personal project. Idk it's kind of like how in Prime he used the Chaos Council's power core schematics to create the shatterdrive, if that makes any sense. He claims the title of inventing shatterdrive technology, but he does not hide where he drew inspiration or based his designs from

Nine (and his programmer role) have two bits. One is modeled after Chaos Sonic, and the other is modeled after Alpha Grim Sonic.

The purpose of Nine's bits are essentially to act either as extensions of Chaos Sonic and Alpha Grim Sonic or to be additional bodies the robots can upload themselves into. The former is largely useful for stuff like recon, and the latter is used in the event Nine needs to make his robots more portable for some reason (for example, in this case, he wanted to keep his robots with him during Amy's party, but didn't want them taking up space on the train)

Unless one has the proper tools, only Nine is able to access the memory of his bits (in regards to actually scrolling through their memory logs AND in accessing footage they record). Tails did not bring tools necessary for this on the train with him (especially since he takes his role as detective very seriously). This is important in case, say, the Detective and Barry end up getting ahold of one of the Bits and they happen to maybe have crucial evidence.

Fun fact! The Poet does manage to "finish the job" about the same way as he does in the original game. He is lucky that The Programmer is not in the lounge car during his arrival before and escape after the attempted murder. However, this doesn't mean The Programmer left the room completely empty and unsupervised...

Another fun fact! Rather than getting an interrogation like The Sheriff does in the Saloon Car, the Bartender withholds a special clue he found (that could possibly lead to the murderer). Tails and Barry just have to complete a task for him that involves the Super Monkey Ball arcade machine

The same way Sonic and Mangey's character cards and Sails and Knuckles' specifiy that they have a type of relationship to each other, so, too, do Shadow and Nine's cards.

Excluding Barry, The Co-Captain is the only character to suspect foul play when the Captain is "murdered" during the game. However, this is largely due to the fact that (with how the character movements are structured) the Captain and the Conductor suddenly disappear, leaving the Conductor's car in disarray. It's also a while before the Co-Captain reaches anyone who is aware that Sonic's character was murdered.

Final tidbit...! There are kisses involved. Even if they're ooc for the roles they're playing, with the prime polycule involved I had to work em in! 😂

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And with that, I'd love to thank you for the ask, anon! Although it may not have been your intention, I bamboozled myself into getting majorly invested in this little prime polycule au 🥰

[where-i-go-insane]

i am legally obligated to think of a band AU for every piece of media i enjoy

silly little brain was imagining a Soul Eater band AU (as one who is normal about things often does) and i had a few thoughts and i think i will ramble about it a little bit here to make more thoughts. i think since they'd have such a large group, they kind of swap out/tap in for certain songs so they're rarely all playing at the same time. they all probably play a couple instruments because of this (with a few exceptions) and there's just a fun assortment that they've got going on and i also think that would make some of their songs sound drastically different since it would be like a different combination of people playing. overall, i feel like they're pretty gritty and punk, but they've probably got a wide span between more electronic and maybe even hyperpop adjacent stuff and like "original" punk and rock stuff. i think it'd really depend on who was playing.

some of the instruments are obvious. Soul is legally required to play the keyboard/synth/whatever keys exist, though he probably knows how to play the most instruments out of the group so even though he's mainly piano, he can play everything and he'll add his own little flair to it.

my brain is yelling at me that Tsubaki would play the bass. idek why but it appeared in my thoughts and i think that that's the gospel truth that Tsubaki would play the bass. i feel like she would also play some wildcard instrument like a violin/viola or flute or idk like an oboe and when she breaks that out you know the song is gonna go crazy.

now, i think Black☆Star and Kid are vocals, whether they're singing solo or together and they're probably "on deck" the most, though they probably do back off at certain points. Liz is also a vocalist (i feel in my bones that she'd be like a "talk singer" or like an ashnikko type thing where she's AGGRESSIVE with her singing) but my brain is telling me she's on the guitar a lot and wouldn't be singing most of the time. she uses a lot of cool guitar picks and she likes throwing them out into the audience and people would throw picks back at her to use (and she would use them). when all three of the singers are on at the same time, the balance would be insane and i can't imagine which ranges each of them would cover (Liz is a solid mid-range voice, but i can't decide who would be higher and lower registers between Black☆Star and Kid).

Patty would be Exclusively drums and percussion and random noise maker and she's damn good at it, she probably also does fun count offs for all them when they'd start playing. Crona also plays the drums and i feel like they would also play bass, very different vibe from Patty's drumming but still a banger (lol banger, drums, ha). Patty is more "lots of noise and funky combinations" while Crona is more complicated rhythms during the solely instrumental parts. struggling with Maka b/c i think it's funny that she canonically does not know how to do any sort of music, so i think she'd probably mainly be sound and organization help since there's so many of them. HOWEVER, i feel like she'd also be really good at having one of those soundboards and balancers and all that shit (thinking about those ones w/ the square light up keys and also the ones w/ the sliders and switches and whatnot) so she'd be in the back of the ensemble with all her little boards and buttons and be putting all the effects over their music. she could also maybe sing, but i'm talking backup vocals b/c she probably doesn't want to sing a lot, she likes her little tasks.

they are all probably INSANE on stage. jumping, doing flips, handstands, cartwheels, Black☆Star definitely crowd surfs, they're throwing t-shirts into the crowd ALL THE TIME. i'm imagining a situation where they have specifically placed speakers and boxes on stage some of them can literally be elevated above the others while they're playing or singing. none of them are dressed similarly but somehow it still works and you can obviously tell they're in a band. i think their band legally needs to be called Soul Eaters (or Death Sycthes??? Death Weapons???? something like that)

[autisticbokutoenthusiast]

pit babe ep 9 stray thoughts

- charlie’s “you’re the person i’ve spent my whole life trying to stand beside” 🥺

- northsonic my beloved. love in the influencer era “if i leave you who will start the youtube channel” i love my clowns

- charlie looking at alanjeff like ok 😏 i see you is so funny to me

- oh what’s pete doing at the child trafficking ring?? he better be exposing them

- what is babes plan in these situations get into fights he can’t win with no backup when he’s supposed to be sneaking around like makes my guts rumble

- PETE IS THE ENIGMA WKEJRJDEIEKK?!?!,!?! SCREAM I FIFNT SEE THIS COMING

- babe why are you spilling everything while still in enemy territory like be serious right now this is why you’d make a terrible spy

- HUH IS IT OETE IR WAY WHAT WHAT AHHH BITH ITS BOTH WHAT

- babe you fucking fool why are standing in some evil hallway discussing this go back home

- THE LOOK OF BETRAYAL SCREAM

- oh it’s the mind control…

- oh this is why yall hate way…

- CHARLIE POPPING OUT OF NO WHERE TO START WHALING ON HIM DISKDKKDF sorry but i laughed a lil

- none of these bitches ever bring back up like why don’t you work together

- babe and ways actors work well off of eachother i must say

- scream this is devastating “if you still have humanity left” like damn…..

- way you done fucked up boo

- not the flashback montage you can’t keep doing this to me 😞

- oh babe…..

- “why do all the people i love betray me” im going to jump into the sea i cant do this

- how do they find out who an enigma is

- i need tony gone like ripped to shreds im so serious. fuck that man

- the music choice here it’s making me feel like something bad is about to happen…….. WHY ARE YOU SORRY CHERLIE

- oh babe

- if alan’s losing it the teams fucked. ok now he’s gettin naked

- wait is jeff back??? when did this happen???

- ok alanjeff…. are they gonna kiss. psjjsdjdj jeff “at least they’d just kidnap me” … “internships here pay well” ….

- my one complaint about jeff’s visions is i wish he had a that’s so raven animation moment beforehand

- cowardly tragedy enjoyers when the characters are trapped in a tragedy…. unless

- i straight forgot dean existed…idk if i trust him…..

- northsonic being scene stealers again i love my clowns

- deans awkward little thumbs up sjejjdjdj

- charlie’s so real if i ever go missing it’s because i too am in the bathroom getting over stimulated.

- charlie looking at babe like damn bitch you lived like this

- screaming over this charliebabe scene

- OH IS THIS THE FAMED MIRROR MOMENT COMING ABHHHHHH

- winner winning for the first time in his entire life: damn yall suck fr

- tbh for his like first race i think second place is pretty good but idk about all this

this episode was wild i thought THE THING was gonna happen here but i guess it’s next race… im already nervous

[noirvette]

stan, kyle, clyde, and nichole! + band headcanons!!

these are just basic headcanons to go along with we never existed but can be read by itself as well

speaking of we never existed, first official update will be on saturday at 12:00 CT!!

cws: none! Aged up characters

♡ STAN MARSH

Main singer

Does most of the writing for songs (with Nichole)

Band genre is alternative / indie rock? / pop rock / rock (Think like IDKHOW, Joywave, Arctic Monkeys, Nirvana, etc.)

They aren't signed to any major record label (just a small one) and they'd be considered indie because of that but either way

Can play the piano (shoutout trey parker rq) but considering he never gets the chance to really play it, he kinda forgets it's something he can do LOL

He also knows the drums considering he knows how to play piano

Does a lot of the mixing and arrangement of the instrumentals and vocals. Is also a huge perfectionist on this, if something doesn't sound right he gets annoyed

Kyle is backup vocals for certain tracks, and if Stan thinks Kyle didn't sing a note correctly (or rather he knows), he makes Kyle re sing the verse LMAO

Is proud of his music and wants things to be perfect

Will stay up until 4am on writing lyrics. He's not a coffee drinker in my opinion so how he manages to stay up is a mystery (the 6 energy drinks behind him is how)

I feel like, he sounds sort've like a mix of Mitchel Cave (main singer of Chase Atlantic), and Riovaz.

His inspirational genres for his music would be pop rock, indie/alternative rock, and death metal (not too often, but throwin this curve ball in here since.. he DID form a death metal band in s23)

However he does like non rock genres like r&b and alternative pop, only because Kyle tends to listen to those genres a lot and it's rubbed off on him (and the genres are a vibe).

Taught Clyde the drums since freshman year of high school (I'll mention this more later on in Clyde's part)

Has perfect pitch, idk it seems like.. so like Stan to just casually have perfect pitch

♡ KYLE BROFLOVSKI

Manager

He was actually the one who brought up the idea of a band (hence him being the manager), only because he was bored and figured "hey.. a small local band might be kinda fun to do!" and then the band got popular and now hes like "wtf"

Now despite Kyle looking more like he'd be a tenor, he's got a baritone singing voice (basing this off the fact he was the bass in s21 ep5)

Can actually play a few instruments (shout out matt stone rq), i.e guitar (both electric and acoustic) and the drums (he seems like a band kid percussionist too anyways)

He didn't want to play instruments in the band though and would rather not be in the limelight.

However he is attributed in a few songs because a) backup vocals, b) is a backup guitarist c) has been the stand in drummer when Clyde is sick.

Is a fan of alternative rock, alternative/indie pop, r&b, and occasionally rap (he's a fan of lil uzi i just know it)

Helps Stan with writing song lyrics, but can't write lyrics for shit so he just summarizes his thoughts and gives it to Stan so he can write lyrics out of it

Is a wonderful manager actually, keeps the band booked and busy.

Is lowkey the errand boy HAHA (poor Kyle)

Not kidding, if something needs to be replaced, Kyle's on it. If they need a gig soon, Kyle's on it. If someone's sick (CLYDE.), Kyle's on it. If they need a few touring members, Kyle's on it. The band seriously would not function properly if Kyle wasn't there to help them with it all (he reminds them CONSTANTLY of this)

Knows the band's dynamics the best, if someone starts getting agitated with someone else, Kyle's helping mediate the entire situation.

Helped with teaching Clyde the drums w/ Stan

♡ CLYDE DONOVAN

Drummer

Learnt drums through out high school from Stan and Kyle because he thought he'd impress people and get dates easier LMFAOO

When Kyle thought of the band idea in their last year of high school, Clyde immediately wanted to join (and hey he knows drums so yeah it works)

Gets overly excited during practices and causes a lot of accidents that it's gotten to the point where Kyle has a "___ days since Clyde caused any incidents", it's at zero.

Likes watching Stan do the mixing and wants to learn but would rather eat his own foot than ask Stan to show him how.

Helped out Kyle with managing the band at the beginning that it caused some in team confusion on whether or not they should switch roles

Doesn't use the fact he's in a band to impress people he's attracted to anymore because the band's popularity grew.

He does interact with his fans the most though, often hosting instagram lives or he's the longest to stay out on stage to talk to the fans before they end a show.

He loves meeting fans of him or the band out in the street and is never mad about being asked to take pictures or get an autograph. Easily the most approachable one of the band

He's actually really grateful to the band and to the fans but finds himself unable to fully express it into words.

Likes to show off his skills when Stan calls out introductions of the band during their songs at concerts(idk some band concerts ive been to stall the instrumental part between the chorus and the verses to do introductions ? do you guys know what i mean 😭)

Gets his fans to attack Craig and Tolkien sometimes, like he'll joke around on twitter with the two of them a lot just to be like "guys don't be mean to me wtf" and his fans come to his aid all the time.

♡ NICHOLE DANIELS

Electric guitarist

Kyle knew she played the guitar from band days together. (Jazz band..)

So he took a shot and asked if she wanted to join their band and she agreed!!

Is the second easily approachable member of the band and is always so excited to meet fans and talk to them.

Has played guitar for so long that she can manage to do the guitar talking rifts (Like the segment of the talking guitar in Yankee Rose) and does it to talk to the fans sometimes

Loves writing song lyrics so she sits together with Stan a lot so they can figure out albums, eps, and singles together.

Some songs are solely written by her too.

They both rarely get into writers block because they constantly bounce ideas off each other

They like story telling through their songs, so the albums often have a small story line to them.

Also provides a small backup vocal segments in certain songs, but isn't a fan of singing (in front of a lot of people at least). She's gotten more confident but would rather let Stan and or Kyle handle the vocals

Likes stage decor and setting up what goes where. Kyle lets her manage that part of his job (the whole stage designing thing) and she's super good at it too. The stage at concerts are always set up beautifully.

Has three electric guitars that she switches out through out the course of concerts, a chrome iridescent one (which happens to be her main choice), a white pale green one, and a dark sage green one.

She also has a red heart shaped electric guitar but considering it's awkward to hold she doesn't play it that often.

Also has a ukulele. Brings it with her to concerts to do a small ukulele section.

[windvexer]

I've been overthinking correspondences lately, i try to do something like a spell for money but i get caught up thinking about whether to use actual cash in the ritual, and if different denominations would be better, and then i get tripped up thinking about whether i personally associate bay leaves with wishing or if I'm just parroting it from other peoples practices XD do you have any advice for choosing good correspondences?

Here is my advice:

Answer these questions for yourself and address any answers which create undue burden for yourself:

Is your personal association for what correspondences mean more important than any "inherent" meanings? Do you even believe in inherent meanings? What is the worst case scenario if you end up using a correspondence that you later on realize is a weak personal association for you?

When you set up your spellcasting space, how much of it matters? Does the cleanliness of the table matter? Does the species of wood the table was built out of matter?

How do you draw the line between which aspects of your spell matter and which do not?

What is the worst case scenario for using unideal correspondences? For you, is it better to cast a money spell with 50% ideal correspondences, or is it better to never cast it until you can reach 97-98%?

Do you think there is value in experimenting with a wide variety of correspondences and noting the outcome? Do you think there is value in experimenting with correspondences you are unsure of or do not have faith in?

Do you practice a style of magic where your personal belief in the outcome is totally vital? Is it possible for you, personally (as it is certainly possible for others), to manifest spells successfully even if you experience doubt or uncertainty during spellcasting?

When considering these questions, if you come on any answer which makes you think, "that's it - that's the reason I can't choose correspondences,"

Change your magical practice, why not? 🦞

Try telling yourself, "look - I'm going to put a pin in what I believe right now. I'll save this version of my practice in a nice file-folder, as a backup. But for the time being I'm going to choose to believe that magic works differently. After all, there are a lot of valid ways to work up a successful spell. There is no reason for me to stick with these hindering beliefs."

I would like to focus on this bit:

How do you draw the line between which aspects of your spell matter and which do not?

I suspect from your ask that you have found yourself in a situation where literally everything matters, not just that you should have money but the number correspondences of the denomination; not just the bay leaf but your subconscious anxieties about bay leaves; and so on.

If you like, consider this concept of spellwork, which is highly theoretical and which I am not pushing as a literal cosmology:

There is the Physical (hello! I'm here, currently) and sort of on top of and around the physical is an astral, ethereal layer we're going to call the Spiritual.

The Spiritual is a dreamworld that resembles the physical in many ways, but the biggest difference is that only things filled with spiritual power become solid in the Spiritual.

As a witch practitioner, of course your job is to make a very solid spell in the Spiritual.

And you, Anon, as a practitioner of sympathetic magic (which is what we're all doing when we use correspondences), have chosen to make a spell by collecting various spiritual powers that correspond to physical objects you have gathered.

Or, in other words:

You are not using the power of the dollar bill.

The dollar bill has no power. It does not exist on the Spiritual.

You are using the dollar bill as a gateway or focus point to channel or evoke the actual energy you want.

And you, as the practitioner, get to choose which energies are drawn up into the Spiritual.

When you are working with the dollar bill, you can choose to channel various energies: money, greed, the number correspondence.

You are not (or should not be) empowering the entire bill and every single association it's ever had, ever - nor should you be actively empowering your own anxieties (this bay leaf also corresponds with doubt) or worries (this dollar bill has the wrong number correspondence).

Yes, you should be choosing to the best of your abilities which aspects matter for this spell. And then you should literally raise, channel, draw in, evoke, or summon those relevant aspects into the Spiritual.

Again - it is not the object with its complete and total history and full set of correspondences that matters to your spell. It is only the energies that you draw into the Spiritual, made easier by virtue of having a strong correspondence to open the roads and ease the way.

Anon, when you actually sit down to raise metaphysical energy, are you shoving as much raw energy as you can into these items? Are you addressing the items as complete beings without directing their focus?

Consider for example our good friend Basil, who among other things can protect very well, and draw in a lot of money.

When you call Basil on the Spiritual phone, do you say, "I need you for a protection spell," (or, do you specifically focus and channel protective energies)? Or do you just call Basil and say, "help - I'm sure you'll figure out the context when you get here?"

It's the same for Bay Laurel. "Bay Laurel, arrive and do every single thing which I personally associate you with." Or, "Bay Laurel, arrive and grant wishes?"

Bay Laurel grants wishes for some people. That aspect exists. You can ask for it, or channel/evoke it, or whatever, whether or not you also have a personal association with self-doubt.

And because that particular desiccated little commercially farmed leaf bought in a megachain grocery store has no spiritual power at all, the only thing arriving in the Spiritual are those aspects you are calling on and working to make arrive.

NOW I WILL SAY,

Despite all the words spent on it, this is a grossly oversimplified philosophy. Energies and powers do have various flavors, after all. Getting a wish granted by Bay Laurel is not much like getting a wish granted by Old Scratch. And what about objects already filled with a certain power?

But, I think overall that you should consider that you have much more power over what is going on inside of your own spells than you think you do.