#the desk of stupidity

[conretewings]

BEHOLD!

HE SMOL

HE STRONG

@daily-crabbys How would you rate my friend?

[alonolaart]

MEGA RICH LIGHT-BENDING GUY - "Something's amiss. The light beams bend around his face and scatter in a thousand directions. It seems the laws of physics do not apply here. They are suspended, distorted, an echo."

Number 4 in my series of Disco Elysium patches 🪡

[pcktknife]

I am simultaneously the luckiest and unluckiest fucker ever I can't believe this

[stuffeddeer]

i like to think dazai would be like the textbook definition of cheesy in a relationship. ik it’s a popular hc people have for him to be noncommittal and not a good partner but i honestly think he wouldn’t be as bad at being a partner as some people think (but i do respect the hc’s and the angst is always well written) i just personally think he’s super whipped for his s/o and obsessed to the point everyone else is who now??

HEUIHFSH SAME pathetically smitten dazai is my FAVORITEEE uurrggg .... he’s so pathetic loser........ this is why i love dazai he’s so versatile :) i need him pathetic crying over me and i need him unable to say he loves me at all oooouh ..,

His feet nudged yours under the desks once again. You looked up at him with a curious glance, waiting to see why he needed your attention, but no such answer came. Dazai merely continued to gaze at you, lovesick written all over his face as it started turning red. They're looking at me! ran through his head, almost forgetting that he had nudged you in the first place.

"What are you doing, you moron?" Kunikida spoke angrily, annoyed Dazai was blowing off his work once more.

"Staring at my partner. They're so pretty, don't you think?" His words made you smile, which caused him to melt all over again. "See? See!? Ahh, love... Your smile could light up the whole city of Yokohama. If you weren't already mine, I'd tell you to use your powers for good. But I couldn't live with myself if you had to go away!"

Kunikida's face contorted in confusion. "Go away..? What are you blabbering on about this time?"

"Once the government learns my darling's smile can rejuvenate and revitalize people they'll put them to work!" He pouts. "I'll never get to see them again when they're out saving lives!" He throws his head back dramatically, hand draping over his heart.

While your blond coworker groaned in annoyance—mainly at himself for asking—you merely chuckled. "That's alright. I wouldn't want to be away from you for long, either."

Dazai gasped, standing up suddenly. "You mean it?! Ohhh, how you just warmed my heart!~ My lovely partner wants to stay by my side! Kunikida, trade desks with me!"

"What, no! Why?!"

"I need to sit next to my beloved! If we're apart, I can't get any work done!"

"You can't get any work done, anyway!"

[omaano]

"I bet it was the martini that blew your cover." "You can judge my drinking habits after you got me out of here, Djarin!"

I've seen one (1) James Bond movie my entire life back when 00Q was a whole thing on this hellsite, but I'm ready to die on the hill that Din would make a great Q who knows how to work in the field and can poke at gadgets just fine, but also gets very passive agressive when he has to work overtime - he asked for the office job because his kid is going to school and they are working on building a normal-adjacent nighttime routine, which is very difficult when the agent he's working with cannot stick to a plan.

For the Spies/Assassins square on my Bobadin AU bingo for @bobadinweek

(I've seen all the John Wick movies though, so if Boba's pose is familiar, that is why)

[tenspontaneite]

Everyone congratulate Kia for finally figuring out that if you want lap cuddles it's possible to jump into said lap instead of roaming around yelling until you're picked up

[justaz]

merlin is used to making up excuses on the spot when cornered regarding anything from magic to treason to murder and like usually gets away with it although his pride is a little bruised or sometimes he’s dragged before the king and arthur is exasperated but says he’ll handle it and does so by ordering merlin to muck out the stables or whatever other meticulous or nasty chore as punishment. however, after spending four days straight fighting off assassination attempt after mythical beast after assassination attempt and then being scolded for spending days in the tavern, merlin gets caught lacking and two guards are looming over him with the weapons held threateningly while questioning him. for some fucking reason, merlin and his sleep deprived brain hand over the de bois family sigil and the guards back off like immediately. merlin takes advantage of this cheat code as much as possible. it gets to the point where he blatantly uses magic in front of everyone and then flashes the sigil to get away with it

[nattikay]

Kìyevame [speedpaint/timelapse]

So at last goodbye I will be happy just to have known you...

[clowndotgay]

render for @ cogbreath ! alt with funny blue light under the cut.

[sergle]

had to go to the vet today bc Theo (cat) has a HUGE fuckin cyst on his neck (pastulio), also had to fix someone's commission, also had to call my doc to try and get my meds refilled and he didn't answer the phone and is probably too technologically incompetent to ever call me back so I'll have to try again, also we all struck out getting a personal loan to pay for the kia engine eaeaauUUHhhh

[mail-me-a-snail]

dt. cole phelps, badge 1247.

I CAN'T BELIEVE I FORGOT TO POST THIS but here's the cover for my cole playlist while i work on comms and exams :]

(won't be linking the playlist as it's not done yet)

[dizzybizz]

me everyday of my life

also please feast your eyes on this absolute creature

he is perfect in every way...

[zaptrap]

what if jay has amnesia but he just never gets memories back. imagine

[stalebagels]

The stewbert fans are eating good tonight

[viyojo]

POV the room password is 8008

I'm blaming this one on lilo

[mwagneto]

imagine being stuck centuries and lightyears away from home waiting for the man you're in love with for several lifetimes because he's the only person in the universe who can maybe give you any answers and you're also just deeply and hopelessly in love with him and then you finally finally find him and he hits you with "did i? busy life. moving on." and "it's not easy even just looking at you" and "flew all the way to the end of the universe just to get rid of you". happened to my good friend jack harkness