#the pose was hella difficult for this too

[sunandmoonster]

Head empty, only zolu hhhh @v@

And yeh, wolf!zoro went into rut and it’s the captain’s duty to help him out ehehehehe >:]

[akwardlyuncool]

Are Back Here Again?!

So in the most rude way possible When Were Young Fest has decided to announce the lineup for their 2023 date. And I’m not being facetious when I say rude, because the 2022 dates haven’t even happened yet and they’re already about to start the pre-sale for the next one. We don’t know how well or rather how absolutely terrible this year’s is going to be, but hey why not just ride off on the cloud of imaginary good vibes. I have no doubt in my mind that my and other folk’s anxiety will soon pop off if it hasn’t already, this is just the beginning. We’ve seen what outdoor festivals with big names like this have looked like this year (look up MCR at Riot Fest!) and tell me this isn’t asking for more trouble, that is if When We Young Year 1 lives to even tell the tale.

Now I don’t want to spend this whole post yelling with my WARNING SIGN, mainly because you can read my 2022 WWWY Fest post that I did back in January if you want more in depth reasons why I think this is a terrible idea. No, today I’m going to cry.

If you’ve followed me for a decent amount of time or had a musical conversation with me, you know that my two favorite bands are Green Day and Relient K. My dream tour is a double headline featuring both of them and I get to pick the setlist. (Remember it’s dreamland and in my fantasy I get two kinda opposite bands on the same stage and I get to pick the setlist.) If you’ve listened to those two bands, you’d know that they might wind up on the same “elder emo/pop-punk” playlist, but the idea of them being on the same tour isn’t likely. Warped Tour made some lineups like that happen, however even Warped Tour had it’s modern limitations. When We Were Young decided to make that happen. The catch is however, that it’s still flying in dreamland for me.

If this was happening in my state that be one thing, however convincing other 30 somethings who have kids and jobs and other important day to day stuff going on, would be hella rough and that’s not including the expense of it all. Basically the chances of me getting to be able to go (I’m not doing The Vegas by myself) are very slim to none and I just want to be sad about that for a while lol. Actual personal dream tours are a very rare sighting and part of me just wishes I could be happy that this is even taking place at all, but it’s posing difficult. I eventually got over this years festival because it all seemed to good to be true and a bodily hazard, but this new one is gonna take a minute.

That being said and not to knock the current lineup, but the 2023 roster is substantially better. I say that because there’s too much of my super core here to say I’d take Set It Off, who I absolutely love, over the original line up of Something Corporate. There are I believe 6 bands on that lineup that have made some of my favorite albums of all time, which is un-heard of, even for the most dedicated of Pop-Punk fans, to see in any given tour.  Again there’s red flag and shock here. Will come back after 2022′s festival is over and see if dreams came true or if all of our suspicions were grossly correct.

So Once Again I’m Gonna List Off The Top 10 Bands I’d See If Magic Were To Happen and I Get To Go:

Green Day

They are my favorite band and I have yet to see them live, so a priority they will be.

Relient k

I will do whatever it takes to make seeing them and Green Day in one day happen.

Something Corporate

Good Charlotte

Gym Class Heroes

YellowCard

They would be higher, however I’ve gotten to see them at Warped Tour, so I can prioritize a few other bands first. (Even if I was in the back for that show.)

Simple Plan

Again all my favorite bands from 2004 in one day would be a dream.

Bowling For Soup

Sum 41

The Academy Is...

I don’t talk about how much I enjoy The Academy Is... enough and would very much like to see them live.

PS: Just reading that list is making my brain explode. Like it can’t compute that anyone would get to see even a fraction of those bands live, in a single day. Maddness.

.

.

Also to fight here instead of Twitter, here are 2 “hot takes:”

One, not to knock anyone’s music tastes, but if you saw this lineup and were most excited for 5SOS, the ticket you don’t have should be revoked. You can not sit at the adult table this evening as you are obviously not an adult.

Two, if you’re comparing 2022′s headliners to bands simply on the 2023 lineup and not headlining you need to sit all the way down. ATL and NFG are not the headliners, they have not downgraded.

[headcanons-blog]

hiiiii! I saw your post and thought you might want this, but sfw/nsfw hcs for Sunny Day Jack? can be yandere, idm at all (ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*.✧

make sure to drink some water and take time to love yourself, you deserve it c:

//Omg you are so sweet!! Thank you so much!! I put some yandere vibes here because ya know,,, it's canon that he's hella manipulative,,,//

tw: smut, manipulation, slight mental and emotional abuse, general yandere boy stuff

Sunny Day Jack:

SFW:

Jack is an extremely lovesick person... ghost... entity?

He's most likely taller than you. He loves to lean down and give you quick cheek and nose smooches. He thinks it's cute how flustered it makes you, especially when he does it in public.

Dates are a little difficult for you two, since you can't speak to him in public without looking like a crazy person, but you two always find something fun to do together.

Mall dates are fun though! You take him to all the stores to show him what the latest trends are. He also helps you pick out clothes or things for around the house! Going to a movie theater is fun too! You don't have to talk much, and the best part? Jack gets in for free!

Has a huge sweet tooth assuming he can even eat and he prides himself in being a fairly decent baker. He's always trying to become better and he'll constantly ask you to sample his latest baking experiment.

Loves to pick you up! You've seen how beefy this dude is, he can pick you up no matter what size you are. Speaking of which...

Not gonna lie, I think he likes someone who's thicc. Packing thicc thighs? This dude will fucking MELT. He loves how soft you are!

Loves to snuggle! He really likes holding you in his arms because he feels like he's protecting you but he likes to be held sometimes too! His favorite is laying his head on your lap.

Pro tip, if you run your fingers through his hair, this man will be putty in your hands. Lay his head down on your lap and just go to town. You'll almost hear him purring.

He always kisses you better if you get hurt, and it is really cute. It doesn't matter if it's as little as a papercut, he will kiss that booboo to make the pain go away.

Gets extremely jealous and paranoid. He thinks everyone poses as a threat and he constantly worries someone will take you away from him.

He subtly manipulates you to isolate you from other people. Always telling you that he'll "never leave you" and "you don't need them when you have me," and even "aren't I enough?"

NSFW:

He's 100% the dominant one in the bedroom. He loves having complete control over you.

He's very gentle with you, maybe even too gentle. You have to practically beg him to go harder or be rougher, which if he's being honest, thinks is pretty sexy. He loves feeling needed by you.

Jack loves to tie you up. He thinks it's extremely sexy how the ropes and ribbons leave imprints on your skin, and he loves to have you at his mercy to do as he pleases.

Willing to try anything at least once. All he wants is to please you after all.

A bit of an exhibitionist. He takes full advantage of being invisible to everyone but you. It'll start with gentle, wandering touches, just to watch you blush and squirm a bit. After a while it'll turn into full blown sex.

Alone in the backroom of your work? Jack will be fucking you hard against your boss's desk. In a dressing room trying on clothes? He'll pick you up and fuck you against the mirror on the wall. Talking with Shaun a friend over the counter in your kitchen? Best believe this boy will be sitting on the floor with his face between your legs.

Speaking of which, please sit on this dudes face. He just loves how soft and plushy your thighs feel around his head.

Jealousy sex is very prevalent in your relationship. He gets so jealous so easily, and when he becomes jealous, the dirty talk becomes very possessive.

"You're mine, Sunshine. Look at how well you're taking me, we fit so perfectly together. No one else can make you feel the way I do."

[absolutebl]

Thai BL Does Shakespeare

Oooo this’ll be fun. So since Bad Buddy is basically doing a contemporary pastiche of Romeo & Juliet, only gay, it made me want to see this done for other Shakespeare plays. 

Of course I had to give them new Thai BL-ish titles too, okay? 

Romeo & Juliet = Bad Buddy 

What we’re getting: Romeo & Romeo from GMMTV as a university set Thai BL staring two of their best actors. 

More? We want it to end happily, but otherwise, so far so good. 

Twelfth Night = What You Will 

What I want: look this is a crossdressing piece and why not just do that? Admittedly both Japan and Vietnam handle drag better, but if Thailand could be honest about it I think they’d do a great job. Of course one of the main characters is named Will. 

More? This is my favorite Shakespeare play so it has to go to an established pair that can really act and also look hella pretty. I dithered over Sugus & Tenon (PitchBank from Golden Blood) but not sure they have shown their metal enough to anchor a full show like this one. Settled on PerthLay because Lay is so beautiful and Perth broods beautifully, and I’m pretty confident they got the skillz for it. 

Taming of the Shrew = Taming of the Tsundere

What I want: 10 Things About You only gay af. And I think EarthMix could handle it. Admittedly it could be argued that this is SOTUS already, but either way BL actually suits this play which (might be argued) is the most difficult to modernize. By making this one gay, you can play with gender roles and not face up to the serious feminist issues it poses for a modern audience. 

More? There is a huge part of me that thinks this should to go to Taiwan to be done properly. But that’s not the game I set out for myself. 

Much Ado About Nothing = Much Ado About Engineering 

What I want: this one could be adapted pretty easily to a new students starting at engineering uni model. The existing host family is the older students and the visitors are the new freshmen. So back into 2 Moons territory. It’s got enemies to lovers, solid side dishes, and a super one note villain (did Mame take notes?). 

More? Frankly this kinda writes itself, it basically IS BL already only the original forgot to be gay. The leads have to be able to deliver the back and forth barbed wit of the dialogue though. Beatrice has one of the best rants ever written.

O God, that I were a man! I. would eat his heart in the marketplace.

The actor has to be able to handle it. Which honestly left me no choice, Gun it is. They’re getting a bit old for a uni setting but really who but OffGun could do this play justice? 

As You Like It = Too Much of a Good Thing

What I want: another cross dressing piece only this time a pastoral comedy and honestly I think that is it’s charm, so it has to be kept. In other words, like 1000 Stars this BL would need to leave the city to be successful. 

More? This play is too long, no one argues that, so it’s need to be cut back, but it is a good adventure story. So I handed it to SantaEarth, I think they could redeem themselves with this one. Also Earth = the Prettiest Rosalind EVER. 

Midsummer Night’s Dream = What Fools These Students Be

What I want: Starhunter to roll out their full cast of chaos babies and go to town like they did with Gen Y only with an actual story and script to work with. I don’t know how they might handle the fantastical elements but I think they should leave them in. 

What we got already: I should say this one has already been done as a gay teen movie, it’s called Were the World Mine and it’s worth tracking down. I think it’s one that, now, only BL fans would appreciate anymore since it has soem issues with dub con and such, but hey we’re used to that. 

(source)

[squeakadeeks]

had the thought to compare and contrast difficulty levels for costumes that i've made 👁👁💦 i gave a brief description in the images above, but in the read-more I go more in depth about what it was like working on all of these

Sandalphon: honestly i felt like the sewing parts of this one were the hardest. I didnt have to do too much tailoring other than following my usual pattern and slapping foam accents on top. the wing assembly also went smoothly bc i managed to use large surface areas of velcro, that being said i really wish i had put more effort into the wings and made them look nicer. to me they look really flat and...blah. the foam feathers needed more detail.

Lif: lif was hard but shockingly not as bad as one might assume? mostly my standards were really high but the engineering for him wasnt too crazy. Casting the transparent worbla was a NIGHTMARE but it was frustrating more than hard if that makes sense. there were a few armor pieces like his bracers I had to make several times over, but what made him difficult was making sure each armor piece looked really polished and overlaying everything. i think i had maybe a rage-quit or two but not a crazy amount.

Corrin: speaking of rage quits man corrin was probably the hardest armor for me, mostly bc he was maybe the 3-4th armor set i had made and he was entirely vinyl wrapped, which was new to me. I almost quit this project like 4 times. what made it hard was overlaying all the armor pieces and getting a good, flattering fit while also achieving smooth vinyl wraps.

Alfonse: I've only alluded to this but i actually made alfonse to cope with my extreme depressive episode in 2019 where i had daily Unaliving thoughts and my coping strategy was "everytime i want to Do That, get up and work on alfonse" and then boom alfonse got made. my memory of that project is hazy, but i know i worked like an absolute madman on him, but the details are eehehehhehhehhhhhh. i remember it being really hard and i had to remake most pieces on him several times (i know i was up to 6 attempts on his shoulder)

Hypnos: I made hypnos after a string of armor projects and jumping into chiffon was a challenge, i also had to learn french seams and all that and it suuuuucked. His blanket was also really hard to work on bc it was so large, fitting it into my maschine was a struggle and even small changes took large amounts of time bc of the scale. I also wanted him to have the highest polish of any recent project so i went bananas making sure everything turned out as perfect as possible. it was hard!! but breaking down his costume into individual parts helped.

Robin: oops im writing an essay so i'll keep this short, the hardest part of robin was figuring out how to effectively have "glowing lights" with no obvious source on my torso. the concepting stage took about a week of fiddling with LEDs, but once i had a plan making him wasnt super bad. the hardest part was his jacket just bc i used pleather and it was hard to finangle.

Nekomancer: TBH he was i think the easiest project ive made in recent years? the capelet posed the biggest challenge, but other than that it was a pretty friendly project (the broom was also hard, but i struggle with props unilaterally so hmmm)

Kaworu: Kaworu was like..."hard easy" if that makes sense. what made him hard is there's virtually 0 margin for error on plugsuits so everything has to be executed perfectly which is hhhhaaaard. vinyl wrapping his armor was tough. I also messed up on the patterning (the ribs should be much smaller) and that haunts me.

---

Padparadscha: looking back padpa was harder than i remembered, like not just tailoring a 12 paneled bodice and figuring out the wig, but im also recalling how difficult fabric matching was. Getting a perfect pale gold with the right balance of sparkle that also contrasted nicely with the ivory sateen took a lot of trial and error. padpa was hella hard, but i do wish the end result looked better -_-

Phos: wow almost the same situation, tailoring the bodysuit was hard (im not at all happy with how it turned out) it wasnt as crazy as padpas, but still turned out worse oopswhoops....fabric matching was much harder here since i had a super clear vision for what i wanted the moon outfit to look like, i had to layer 5 different types of tulle and organza to get the look 👀 and the wig was difficult bc the vinyl i got was harder to work with (making sure it curled and curved took a lot of effort)

Karna: KARNA IS THE HARDEST PROJECT IVE EVER DONE D: people always think its lif but nah...it was karna. karna had so so so many armor parts, and they all had to be clear, clean and polished. similar to a plugsuit, i felt like there was no margin for error and with his design there was little to no ability to hide flaws AND his attachments make no sense. he took a month and a half of daily work and im still iffy on his end result. the armor had to be super form fitted, the bodysuit had to be perfectly flattering to fit his stupid betty spagetti ass frame, the wig was hard, the cape was hard, he was hhhhhhaaaarrddddd

i might write the other ones later rn im tired and i got an exam to study for girl help

[moonjosjongwoo]

Hello :D I have random question for you...

If Moonjo and Jongwoo were animals, what animals would they be? :D

i really did try not to be all weird and creepy with this ask, i swear lmfao. i was trying to come up with something more metaphorical and idk...not weird, but this is matt y'all are talking to and i'm literally stupid and don't think about like beautiful, elegant references to why i think this character is like this animal. it took me a few days to respond to this because i knew i was going to embarrass myself, but i also love it when y'all send me asks like this and i didn't want you to think i didn't like it.

so, because i really did enjoy the question and also at risk of never getting another one again because of how off the wall this answer is, here goes:

i watched a tiktok right before i got this message. there's a guy i watch on there who has really terrifying facts about animals that just...oh god i love his videos okay. this question conveniently happened to pop up right after i watched one about ribbon worms. yeah, i immediately thought moonjo. proceed at your own risk here.

idk if you've ever seen these guys online or anything, but they're pretty fuckin terrifying. they hunt prey by shooting this white, branching appendage called a proboscis out and literally dragging their prey in and swallowing them whole. some species can consume prey multiple times their size. i'm not gonna post any links to videos since tumblr likes to delete posts from tags if they have embedded links, but youtube has plenty for y'all. google itself has ample resources too lmao.

but here's the real kicker: they're super hard to kill. most species can regenerate, and it's damn near like they're multiplying because they can be severed in multiple spots.

but the proboscis is really what got me making this comparison. i think to all the hands moonjo had on everyone else in the show. the twins and nambok were petrified of him--even ms. eom had her reservations about him. kihyuk was ensnared by him by simply thinking he had a place where he belonged. and it's obvious jongwoo wasn't getting out until he did what moonjo expected of him. moonjo had them all in his hands.

a couple extra little ribbon worm facts you didn't ask for but you're getting anyway that may or may not be somehow relevant to moonjo:

using the proboscis, a ribbon worm may even inject toxins to paralyze prey or digest them before they even get to its mouth. some of them have a proboscis over 20 times their body length.

as for jongwoo...yeah, brace yourself, because this one isn't any less weird. my boy, because of how unpredictable he is and how he responds to trauma, is a zebra.

let me explain: zebras live in an area rife with predators and other animals that make it very difficult to coexist peacefully. Because of that, they have no other choice but to respond with volatility and aggression.

and we have seen in the show that jongwoo absolutely can and absolutely will fuck your shit up if you pose a danger to him. all in all, he's just trying to live his life and he doesn't attack others just for the sake of attacking others--he does it as a defense mechanism--because he has no other choice.

to continue on that tangent, zebras don't just kick the shit out of their enemies in defense either. they will bite, push, and do whatever it takes to settle whatever shit may be happening. on top of that, if another stallion tries to get involved with their mate, they will absolutely fuck them up. see also: what jongwoo would have probably eventually done had moonjo not turned jaeho into a 'was' before him.

and because i did the same thing for ribbon worms, have a couple of facts about zebras that may or may not have something to do with jongwoo too:

they can run up to 65 km per hour. in miles per hour, that's 40. that's...really fucking fast, and probably also means they have hella endurance--hence, why jongwoo survived that fight, as exhausting and painful as it looked. also, they can sleep standing up. idk if that directly correlates to jongwoo, but i feel like it somehow does.

so yeah--my weird version of something that was probably intended to be a lot more beautiful and metaphorical, but i'm dense as fuck and really bad at metaphors and also just have a genuine interest in strange facts about animals. i really really wish i was sorry, but i wouldn't have shared all this with y'all if i was gonna lie about it lmfao.

that being said, pls don't hate me aldjkfklasjdflk

[dramaqueeenamby]

𝙎𝘦𝘢𝘴𝘰𝘯𝘴 𝗈𝖿 𝗟𝗼𝘃𝗲 | seven

Parings: CEO!Chris Hemsworth x Stripper!OC // Words: 7.8K // Type: Series // Taglist: Yes/No (Inbox me to be tagged or removed) Warnings: Sexual harassment, racial themes, discussions pertaining to child death, miscarriage, alcohol/drug use, and suicide attempts. Angst.

A/N: I'm so sorry for the inexcusable delay in updates. This chapter is hella long and perhaps should have been split into two, but I promised ya'll some answers in the last chapter, so here they are!

“What is that haircut?”

“Why are you zooming in?”

Kaya said nothing, continuing to pinch her fingers to gain a closer look, her smile widening by the second. “Holy shit, you weren’t kidding. “

Chris rolled his eyes. “All children go through phases.”

“This is beyond a phase, my friend. Don’t even get me started on the outfit.” As she erupted in yet another fit of giggles, he took advantage of the opportunity to snatch the iPad away from her.

“Go to sleep.”

Quieting herself down, she wiped at her eyes. “No. Come on. I’m enjoying this, and like you said, you were a dumb kid. How were you supposed to know these photos would haunt you till’ the end of time?”

“Only if they get out.”

“Don’t tempt me with a good time, sir.”

Chris closed the app and looked over at her. “What about you?”

Kaya’s brow lifted. “What about me?”

“What about your phases?”

She snorted. “Absolutely not.” He continued to stare her down, prompting her to cave, a surprising move even for her. Kaya’s tenacity was typically much stronger than that. “Fine.”

She grabbed her phone and unlocked it, opening Google Photos and scrolling mindlessly. She knew that any horrifically embarrassing snapshots would be from as far back as her library went. The older the photo, the higher the likelihood she would regret ever caving.

It took roughly two minutes for her to locate a set, her eyes shutting and a small moan leaving her partially closed mouth.

He smirked. “Found it?”

“Shut up.”

“I’ll take that as a yes.”

“You’re going to make me regret this, aren’t you?”

“Without a doubt.”

She couldn’t help it. She laughed. “At least you’re honest.” Blowing out a breath, she issued a formal forewarning. “In my defense, I was young and dumb.”

“How is that diff—fine, I will reserve my judgment.”

“Liar.” When he said nothing else, she took another deep breath and gradually pulled her phone away from her breast, twisting her wrist so that he could see the screen. “I give you, thebaddestputa69.”

She watched the corner of his lips lift upward as he fought off a smile in favor of a smirk. “Hotmail or aol?” Her surprise at his knowledge of the fallen email servers must have shown because he commented, “I’m old, not ancient.”

She matched his smirk and leaned over to whisper. “Hotmail. Definitely hotmail.”

“AIM username?”

“Come on, the same as my email. I wasn’t creative enough to have multiple aliases.”

He chuckled, grabbing her phone to examine the photo. “I certainly do not miss the peace sign era.”

“I’m pretty sure I used that same pose in all of my photos back then.”

He gestured to the plastered graphic that read ‘jealousy is a disease, get well soon’. “With the same masterful level of editing, I’m sure.”

“But of course, blingee and picnik were a staple.”

A comfortable silence befell them as he returned her phone, and she quickly swiped up to close the app. Kaya was grateful that he didn’t swipe right or left, something she was expecting him to do, if she was being completely honest with herself.

Kaya yawned and naturally laid her head on his shoulder as she reached over to grab the book she was reading when they somehow got on the topic of rebellious and wild phases of days of past.

“Are we th—”

“Finish that sentence, and I will personally throw you out of this damn plane myself.”

Kaya looked over at him, eyebrows furrowed, and mouth pronounced. “It’s a legitimate question.”

“No, it was a legitimate question. However, it stopped being one when you asked me the fifth time.”

“I’m just trying to keep the conversation going. Damn.”

“No, you’re just trying to pester me.”

“Look, it’s obvious you don’t want to hear me talk anymore, so I’m just going to shut my mouth for the remainder of the flight.” He snorted. “What?”

“We both know that’s not possible.” He finally broke his gaze from his phone as he looked over with that knowing smirk that she despised. “You always have to have the last word.”

“That is not true.”

“Kaya, you’re like a child.”

“Keep it up, and you’ll be the one who’s personally tossed from this jet.”

“See what I mean.”

Groaning, she threw her hands up and shook the book in her right hand. “This is the second book in this series.”

“And?”

“And I started the series when we were still on the taxi.”

He shrugged. “Read slower.”

“Chris!”

He laughed, reaching to place his hand on her thigh as she sighed while banging her head back against the headrest. “Relax.”

“Don’t you think if I could, I would?”

“You were doing great five minutes ago.”

“That was in the past.”

“Next time, we’re taking separate jets.”

She didn’t know why but hearing him refer to future happenings both excited and saddened her, for more reasons than one. She cleared her throat. “This is a work trip, right?” He looked down at her as she placed the book down on the ground and held onto his bicep. “You know, something for your company.”

He studied her for a moment and looked up, closing his eyes as he laid his head back against the headrest. “I have the cover of this month’s GQ Italia.”

“Fancy,” she remarked, still unsatisfied with his answer-non answer. “So, I was right. This is a work thing.”

Chris thought about what she said, what she asked, as well as his response before he replied. “They offered to contract a photographer in LA.”

Brows scrunched, she had to ask, now more confused than she was just a few minutes ago. “So why go to them?”

His silence only irked her, the seconds dragging into minutes, which felt like hours. Frustrated and impatient, she called his name again. “Chris-”

“Jesus,” was all she heard before his lips were on hers, palm of his hand pressed against her cheek. Everything else after that was a sensual blur. His other hand moved to her hip, pulling her onto his lap, never once breaking their kiss. She placed her hands on his shoulders, giving a light squeeze, inching her body closer to his, close enough to feel the heat that always emanated over him.

And then, it was over.

Eyes fluttering and breath staggering, she nearly whined when he ran his thumb over her swollen bottom lip.

“This isn’t work for me.”

----

“This is our room?”

Chris looked up and chuckled, watching Kaya spin around the middle, eyes soaking in their suite. He placed her bag near the closet while crossing his arms and leaning against the wall.

“It is.”

Kaya nodded and grabbed the bottom of her sweatshirt, tugging it over her head. She extended her arm out and turned around, lifting a brow. “And we have maid service, correct?”

He eyed her. “Of course.”

Kaya smirked and let the garment fall to the floor.

Chris chuckled. “You wanna explain that?”

“What?” She played innocent, fingers toying with the waistband of her joggers as she began to shimmy out of them. “Staying in a fancy hotel where I don’t have t0 clean up after myself?” She walked toward him, moving to grab her suitcase so that she could find her next outfit. “Granted, we have the maid service at home, but—” Both Christopher and Kaya paused at her statement, equally surprised by how easily it flowed, but more so with the statement itself.

Defense immediately kicked in and Kaya cleared her throat. “I mean, ya know, your place.” She refused to make eye contact that exceeded ten seconds, grabbing the handle of her suitcase and dragging it in the direction of what looked like the bathroom.

“Dibs.”

Her feet weren’t moving fast enough for her liking. In fact, they were slow enough that Chris was somehow able to cross the room and grab her by her arm. She looked up, managing to remain calm while inwardly panicking.

God, please don’t let him ask anything.

“Don’t take too long.”

She swallowed. “Why?”

Her grip on the handle tightened when he moved his hand to her face, the back of it brushing against her cheek. Had he been paying close enough attention, he would have noticed the way she shivered at his touch.

“You want dinner, don’t you?”

-----

“This isn’t exactly what I meant.”

Kaya looked up from her pizza, pausing mid chew. “What? Pizza in Italy? This is goals.”

He intended to take her to a fine restaurant, one where only the elite could afford to dine. Instead, she requested pizza delivered to their room. Kaya never ceased to surprise him. “And why are you eating pizza with a fork?”

She shrugged, adjusting the thin strap of her shirt. “Because pizza is messy, and my life's already messy enough. I avoid when I can.”

Chris didn’t say anything, simply watching her eat. She caught his gaze and looked away. If she could, she’d go back in time and stop herself from ever saying what she did. It’d ruined everything. He’d been acting different around her since, and she hated that. She also hated that she hated it.

Since when did she give a flying fuck about what people thought of her? Let alone him.

It was out of character for her, and she didn’t like it.

She didn’t like it at all.

Similarly, Chris also found it difficult to focus on anything other than the encounter from earlier, but not for the reasons Kaya thought.

Not even close.

“So, what’s the agenda for this trip?”

He chuckled and brought the champagne to his lips. “And ruin the surprise?”

Her eyes narrowed as she replaced the fork with her fingers so that she could eat the crust piece by piece. “What surprise?”

“What kind of question is that? Who gives away a surprise?”

“Are you capable of ever just answering my questions with a straight answer?”

He pretended to think. “I could.”

“But?”

“Where’s the fun in that?”

“You and fun? Never realized they were synonymous.”

“I’d like to think we have fun.”

“We have sex. Really, really, great sex.”

“You don’t consider that fun?”

“Fun isn’t a strong enough word to describe it.” He lifted a brow, and she scoffed, tossing a red pepper packet in his direction. “Stop it. I am trying to have a mature conversation here.”

“Not quite sure how possible that is when both parties are inebriated.”

“Bullshit. You know damn well neither one of us is drunk. You haven’t seen me drunk. Hell, I haven’t seen me drunk in a while.”

The way her tone changed toward the end of her sentence garnered his interest. “Why not?”

She looked at him, her smile faltering as she nervously cleared her throat. “I—uh—I get really bad migraines, and Excedrin is the only thing that works for me.” Telling him the truth, well, a fraction of the truth, felt strange yet relieving, probably because she’d spent so much of her life hiding and lying that the truth was unfamiliar territory. “Needless to say, meds and alcohol? Never really a good combo.”

“You’re drinking now.”

“I haven’t taken any medicine yet.”

“Maybe you won’t have to.”

She smiled sadly. “I will.” A beat. “It’s all I have.” Kaya snatched another piece of her crust and swallowed fully before explaining. “That’s why my sleep schedule, if you can even call it that, is so fucked up.”

He thought about it. “Excedrin has caffeine.”

“An insane amount.”

“It helps your migraines—”

“And keeps me up in return.” When he grew quiet, she offered. “Trust me. The insomnia is much better than the pain.”

“I’m sorry.”

She grimaced, eyes darting in either direction. “Why?”

He sighed and ran his hands all over his face. “That’s why you get so upset when I wake you up.”

“I wouldn’t say upset.”

“You threatened to slit my throat in my sleep.”

“Okay, maybe I was a little upset,” she confessed, and they shared a laugh before his tone grew serious again.

“I’ll be mindful of that.” Head tilted to the side, a sign she was still confused, he continued. “So that you can sleep.”

She smiled teasingly, abandoning the last bit of her food, and pushing her plate to the side. “Is that consideration I hear?”

“It is.”

The way he was looking at her, the lack of typical sarcasm in his tone, it was both welcoming and conflicting. Crawling across the floor, she moved his plate to the side and climbed into his lap.

Hands on his shoulders, she lowered her voice and whispered into his ear. “Well, I’m up right now.”

He made a sound and brought his hands to her hips. “You are.” Her eyes shut when his lips moved to her shoulder. “You should get some sleep.”

Immediately, she coiled back and glared. “Are you serious right now?” He laughed, which only upset her further as he stood up, her legs locking around his waist. “It’s been at least 8 hours.”

“You keeping a timer or something?”

“Look.” She waited for him to place her on the bed before she grabbed the bottom of his shirt and tugging so that he laid back on the mattress. She quickly climbed on top of him. “If there’s one thing I know about us, we are ideal intimate partners. Our sexual chemistry is astronomical.”

His eyes drank her in. “Is that it?”

“Is what it?”

His voice lowered. “Is that all you think we have?”

At that moment, Kaya realized a couple of things. This was wrong. She was suddenly very much uncomfortable. And this was a mistake. This was why she didn’t tell the truth. It meant putting yourself at risk for being vulnerable.

She was never good with that.

Clearing her throat, she climbed off him and flashed a crafty smile. “I’m gonna go shower.” She couldn’t handle seeing his face, so she turned around, purposely pretending she had to look around the room to search for her luggage.

“You should know I hate sleeping with blankets.” Kaya needed to redirect the conversation to another topic. This was becoming all too much for her.

He sat up and rolled his shoulders. “So, strip the bed? Got it.”

“Absolutely not. I could freeze.”

“You just said—”

Kaya stood by the door that led to the living room area and smiled sadly. “I’m a hot ass mess, Chris.” A beat. “The sooner you accept that, the better.”

-------

We need to talk when you get a chance. Please?

No matter how many times she looked at the phone, a new incoming gray message never appeared. She waited and waited, even scrolling up only for it to bounce back with no change.

She missed Nia. She missed their banter. She missed making tik toks with her. And she especially missed the advice giving, of which she could desperately use right about now.

Something was happening between them. With her and Chris. Of which she didn’t know, nor did she understand. It drove her mad because it was a new experience, one where she didn’t feel as though she always had to walk on eggshells.

Being with Chris….

“God.” She ran her hand over her face. What the hell was she doing? She wasn’t with Chris. Not like that, anyway. This was a business transaction. They were both using each other for selfish purposes.

Maybe it was the sex. Nia always warned her that behind every sexual encounter, there was at least some trace of feelings.

Kaya always thought that was bullshit.

Now….now she wasn’t so sure.

“You alright?”

She looked up from her chair and saw Chris walk in. She chewed the inside of her cheek as he sat down in the chair opposite of her. Kaya took in his wardrobe, so casual and laid back. She’d never seen him in denim before, but he looked good.

She didn’t even know the photographer, but she was a fan. A billionaire in Levi’s? Iconic.

“How does it feel to dress like us common folk?”

“Poor.” He winked as she glared. “We should be done soon.”

“Don’t rush on my part. The snacks here are delicious, and who knows, I could play dress up.” She wiggled her brows and straightened when there was a knock on the door.

“Sorry to interrupt,” the photographer spoke up and offered Kaya a friendly smile. “You’re Kaya, yes? I’m Elena.”

Kaya was surprised by the fact that this woman was both speaking to her and actually knew who she was, so her response was delayed. “Yes. It’s nice to meet you.” She offered her hand and noticed the woman was staring at her. Welp. It was nice while it lasted. “Is there something I can help you with?”

“I’m sorry,” she apologized but continued to stare. “It’s just...has anyone ever told you that you have amazing bone structure?”

Kaya sputtered. “Not unless they wanted something from me.”

Elena smiled. “Well, I suppose this is no different.”

“I don’t understand,” Kaya asked, looking over at Chris. He was surprisingly quiet.

“How about we get some shots of the both of you?”

She immediately protested. “Oh no. I—I’m just here for moral support.”

“You did say you wanted to play dress up,” he reminded. She glared. Of course he would choose to speak up now.

She turned her narrowed eyes on him and harshly whispered. “Not while being photographed.”

He placed his hand over hers. “Relax.”

Kaya remembered that they weren’t alone and therefore, had to keep up the act. Even if it was starting to feel less and less like acting.

“I’m used to people watching, not photographing.” He lifted a brow. Laughing, she slapped his chest and took a deep breath. She looked over at Elena. “Will I at least get to see them before you pick which ones to use? If any.”

“Of course.”

Kaya caved. “Fine.” He kissed the top of her head and mouthed a thank you. “You owe me.”

“Sure, I do,” he dismissed, slapping her on her ass as Elena grabbed her to drag her away.

“Time to make magic.”

-----

It was a bad idea, one of many that had occurred, Kaya realized.

When she joked about wanting to play dress—up, she didn’t think that it would actually happen. She didn’t think that she’d become involved in his shoot. Kaya especially didn’t expect to have as much….fun as she did.

And she hated that, too. The fact that she managed to smile and laugh more in one setting than she had in, hell, longer than she could remember. She didn’t like it. She didn’t like it at all.

She really, really didn’t like the way Chris looked at her every time she walked onto set in a new look, and there were a couple of them. The way he focused on her, eyes taking in every bit of her form, all the way down from her shoes up to her hair. Like he didn’t want to look away. Like he couldn’t look away. She despised the way he held her when they were photographed together, often being the reason for her smile or laughter with his comments that he whispered into her ear, sneaking in a kiss against her temple or holding her against him.

It was all so domestic and sweet, and it made no sense.

He was starting to make no sense.

And she especially didn’t understand why she was putting off leaving the bathroom, having sat on the toilet for at least 15 minutes.

As if on cue, two loud knocks on the door pulled her from her thoughts.

“I’m coming, damnit.”

“That’s what you said last time. Come on, Kaya.” She was both surprised and annoyed that it was Chris. She expected it to be members of the glam team that he’d hired to help her prepare for the GQ function he was invited to, and of course, she was forced to accompany him. Turns out he wasn’t just chosen for the cover. He was man of the year. “We’re going to be late.”

“Maybe you should just leave me behind,” she muttered.

“Maybe I can just kick this damn door down,” he countered.

“Then you’ll have to pay for the damages.”

“Then I’ll buy the damn hotel,” he shot back testily. “I’m not going to ask you again, Kaya.”

She scowled and rolled her neck. Kaya knew he was being serious. The bastard could buy his way out of anything.

If only….

Blowing out a deep breath, she swallowed and stood, holding up her dress. It was undoubtedly beautiful, gold, a slit in the middle of her chest and on her left leg exposing more skin than she would have thought appropriate. Her curls were styled in a fancy updo, and her makeup was equally as bold as her dress, finalized with a red lip. She knew that she looked good, and that’s what scared her.

Chris had been looking at her like that all day, and she couldn’t keep handling it.

If she could even consider it handling. Managing was perhaps a better term. Poorly managing was the perfect term.

Kaya ripped open the door and plastered on a fake smile. “Happy?”

And there it was, his eyes widened and softened as he gave her a onceover. “And don’t tell me I look beautiful, cause’ I already know it.”

Kaya figured if she said it for him, she wouldn’t have to deal with the weird and uncomfortable knotting in her stomach that she experienced every time he complimented her.

And it worked, he said nothing, only helping to hold up her dress as they walked to the SUV that would escort them. In the car, she was also pleasantly surprised that he didn’t attempt to make small talk with her during the drive. She was certain, however, that it was because he took at least three different work calls during that time.

She made drafted Tik Toks in the meantime.

When they finally arrived, Kaya nearly ran out of the car right then and there.

“Is that a red carpet?” Her mouth dropped. “What the hell? You said nothing about having to walk a damn carpet that is red.”

He chuckled. Kaya realized his hand was on the exposed portion of her thigh. “Stay close to me, and I’ll take care of you. You’ll be fine.”

Kaya was used to having eyes on her, but that didn’t mean she liked it, especially when it didn’t involve money being thrown her way. “I don’t have to say anything, do I?”

He squeezed her thigh. “You’ll most likely receive compliments.”

“I can handle that,” she spoke more to herself than him. “Just long as no one asks if I prefer cats over dogs or whatever shit they ask.”

He laughed quietly and looked at her. “You ready?”

No. “Yes.”

Chris climbed out the car first so that he could help her out of the vehicle, and as soon as she stepped out, she cursed to herself. There were so many damn people. People taking photographs. People being photographed. People helping both the people the photographed and the photographers. And then there was her. She felt so out of place.

If he wasn’t already holding her hand, she would have grabbed for his.

Kaya used her left hand to hold up her dress, while making sure that she stayed close to Chris who led the way, smiling for the camera while sparing her glances every so often to assess her level of comfort.

Kaya played along, evoking a smile as she posed with him for a few photos. That’s when it started again. Like the photoshoot from a few hours ago, she found herself feeling less forced and more comfortable. Like, it was natural.

Like it was real.

Kaya was eventually allowed to stand to the side as he gave a few interviews, some in English, most in Italian. She’d meant to ask him earlier when the hell he learned to speak so many languages. This was the third she’d learned of. She had a feeling at least one or two journalists asked about her, because he would look in her direction and shoot a wink or something of the sort.

Her smile was a natural reaction.

The process was less daunting than she anticipated, not that she’d ever admit that to him. It was once they moved inside that Kaya realized they’d yet to reach the hard part. That hardest part was “socializing” with the guests, many of which were white, spicy white at best. She spotted some minorities but found that they were just as distant as the rest.

The vim of the event was welcoming, however, which confused Kaya to some extent. She simplified it down to the event was nice, the people were trash, and Chris was both an ass and a gentleman for forcing her to come.

He’d introduced her to a few people, most of which spoke poor English. That, she could acknowledge, was nice. Not the strained English, but his obvious concern for her wellbeing. He was going out of his way to make her feel as comfortable as he could.

It was also irritating because it resurfaced those damn knots.

They were seated at a table, and he was texting someone when she leaned over and tugged on his sleeve. Kaya also took a moment to appreciate how nice he looked. The man was something sinful in a suit. “I think I know him.”

He looked up, immediately locking his phone. “Who?”

She gestured with her chin. “The guy over there talking to the girl with the green dress. But don’t look at them.”

His eyes lifted to the ceiling. Right before he proceeded to look right in that direction.

She laughed despite her irritation. “What did I literally just fucking say?”

“I’ll never understand why people want to do something without actually doing it. I don’t have the time.” She shook her head. He was so impatient. “And how do you know him?”

She lifted a brow. He asked with a newfound sense of urgency. If she didn’t know any better, she would have guessed it came from a place of jealousy.

Kaya studied the stranger across the room again when her eyes widened. “I know. He’s that actor from that porn movie we watched.”

“We don’t watch porn, Kaya. We make it.”

“Stop it.” She leaned closer, hating that her smile contrasted the frustration she felt with how vulgar he was speaking in such a public setting. “And you know the movie where they…..ya know, basically the whole time, and he kept asking in that godawful delivery, are you lost, baby girl?”

Her equally terrible impression caused him to laugh quietly. “I think that is him.”

“I told you.” She spoke a little louder than she would have liked due to her excitement at being correct. “He looks better on screen.”

Chris glanced over at him once more and scoffed. “He’s scrawny.”

“Sir, not everyone is like you and built like a fucking tanker.”

“Not my problem.”

Kaya rolled her eyes and gathered her dress. “I’ll be back. I have to use the restroom.” She stood and leaned over, arms around him from behind as she whispered. “Try not to be too much of a dick while I’m gone, okay?”

He turned to look at her. “And where’s the fun in that?”

Turns out finding the bathroom was a harder task than she’d anticipated. She’d asked one of the servers while maneuvering through the crowd, but it also turned out that Kaya wasn’t the best with directions. She did find it, though.

Eventually.

Kaya was navigating her way back to Chris when she was stopped by a man in a suit along the way.

He was of average height, average build, and average attraction. She was immediately annoyed.

“Hi,” Kaya greeted with a tight smile.

“Hello,” he smiled. Add in average dental health. “You are very beautiful.”

Kaya realized he didn’t have an accent, either. American, most likely. “Uhh, thank you.” When she moved to walk past him, he blocked her. “Sir, I really should—”

“How much?”

Her eyes darted to either side. “I’m sorry?”

“Money is no issue, as I’m sure you can see, and I’d like you for a week.” He stepped closer, bringing his hand to trail it down her arm. “Longer even, perhaps.”

“Sir, I have no idea what you are talking about, and please do not touch me.” It wasn’t so much of a request as much as it was a demand. “Now, I really should—”

“You’re not American.” Kaya continued to be confused as hell when his eyes lit up with excitement. “That explains why you look so exotic.” Confusion easily morphed into rage as she finally caught on to what he was referring to. “I bet you feel di—”

“You’re disgusting,” she hissed, pulling away from him. “I am not a fucking prostitute—”

“Call it what you want, girl,” he dismissed. “I don’t judge. I can pay you well.”

“Go fuck yourself, you sick son of a bitch,” she cursed, turning away when he grabbed her arm. “Let me go.”

“You think that you’re special?” He’d taken on another tone, one that conveyed his anger at being rejected. “The fuckin’ stall I just pissed in is worth more than you, bitch.”

Kaya refused to allow him to see her cry, but she’d be lying if she tried to say that his words didn’t sting, especially his next verbal attack.

“You can slap on that expensive dress and let Hemsworth make you feel special, but I know, you know, and everyone else in this fucking place knows that you’re nothing but a cheap, illegal whore—” Panic arose when he moved his hand to the exposed skin of her thigh, squeezing tightly. His hand started to inch upward when Kaya acted on instinct. He cursed aloud while Kaya gasped as she realized that she’d silenced him with her fist dead square in the middle of his face. “You fucking bitch!”

Shock and fear took over as Kaya gathered the bottom of her dress and ran, as much as the gown and her heels would allow, that is. Certain he was going to chase her for retribution, she consistently looked back, unaware that she needed to be just as aware of what was in front as what was behind.

She shrieked and immediately went to pull herself away from the strong body she’d collided with.

“Kaya.” Refocusing her attention, she looked up and realized it was Chris. “Where the hell—” He stopped amid his statement when he took in her appearance and realized that she was crying. “What happened?”

“Nothing.” Kaya looked down, speaking more to herself than him. Not that it mattered. He was judging based on what he saw instead of what she said. He’d learned by now that her words rarely matched the truth. “Let’s just go—”

“Kaya,” he repeated, softer. Chris brought his hands to her face, forcing her to meet his gaze as he asked again, slowly. “What happened?” A strike of anger flashed in his blue eyes. “Did someone touch you?”

“No,” she answered, quickly. Too quickly.

The anger escalated exponentially. “Who? Tell me.”

Kaya could have slapped herself. She wasn’t helping the situation. She was making it worse. “It doesn’t matter, I hit him, and now he’s probably going to sue you—”

“Where is he?” Chris was looking behind her, eyes flaming. He was livid. “Show me. Now.”

“No.” Speaking was becoming an increasing challenge, especially against the backdrop of overwhelming emotions. Everything she’d been feeling, preventing herself from feeling, and afraid to acknowledge was gradually bubbling to the surface. “Just—just let me go back to the hotel. I’m messing everything up for you.”

He calmed for a second, realizing what was happening. Chris was unfamiliar with this side of her. Unfamiliar with seeing her so vulnerable. “What?”

Kaya suddenly realized that her eyes were burning again. She was fighting back tears. “I’ll give you back the money for the day, it’s—it’s fine, you’re better off without me here—”

Her offer to pay him incensed Chris. This wasn’t about the money. It stopped being about the money a long time ago, even if he hadn’t realized that until today. “I don’t want the fucking money, Kaya.”

She shook her head and closed her eyes. “Don’t—don’t say that.”

“Why? It’s the truth.”

“Please,” she plead. Control over her emotions was a battle she’d all but lost at that point. Her words, she was certain, would be next.

He raised his voice. Chris sensed, saw that she was uncomfortable, but he also realized that this was what she needed. A push. “Why?”

“Because this all about the fucking money, okay?” She matched his volume, accepting that her tears were going to fall no matter how much she willed them not to. She’d lost the war. “It has to be about the money, because if it isn’t then that means you care, and—you can’t, alright?”

He studied her, wondering if she realized this conversation was difficult for him too. He brought his hand to the side of her face. “Why is it so impossible for you to accept that I fucking care about you?”

She looked up, glistening eyes and wavering voice. “Because then I have to admit that I care about you too, and I can’t do that.” She spoke to herself, as if vocalizing it would cement a decision that was already out of her hands. “I won’t do it.”

“Why?” He pressed. Chris brought his other hand to the other side of her face, cupping it and moving closer. He gave zero fucks about where they were and who could have possibly overheard. “Why are you fighting this so hard?”

She pulled herself away from him, back colliding against the wall as she blurted, “because all I do is hurt the people I care about alright?” In that moment, Kaya realized she was so far gone that the point of return was no longer an option. Her mouth trembled as she struggled to form her next sentence, listing off names with her fingers as props. “Mami, Papi, Nia. Hell, my own brother is dead because of me.” A beat. “I’ll only hurt you, and I care about you too much to do that.”

“Kaya—"

A newfound heaviness started to weigh upon her chest, another blockade to her speech. “I’m standing here in a dress I can’t afford, a building I can’t even fucking pronounce, and with a man I don’t deserve.”

His voice lowered. “Did you ever think that maybe, just maybe, I don’t deserve you?” Kaya looked at him, her eyes softening before she squinted, her face scrunching up in obvious pain.

He took note of this. As invested as Chris was in finally getting Kaya to open up about how she really felt, her wellbeing would always be his primary concern.

“Kaya.” He placed his hands on her waist, steadying her. “What’s wrong?”

“I—” She blinked several times, blinding lights obscuring her vision. “I—can’t—" Kaya felt the firmness of his chest, inhaled the scent of his cologne, and heard her name on his lips before everything faded to black.

-----

She awoke on her side, body clutched against a pillow, and a thin sheet covering half her body. Never one to take her time returning to her senses, she forced herself to sit up, eyes still scrunched from the sleep.

Looking down she realized she was dressed in only one of Chris’s dress shirts, her dress discarded.

Memory returned as Kaya replayed the events that transpired prior to her slumber. The photoshoot. The party. The asshole.

Chris.

“I don’t care. Tell them to send it in the mail or something.”

She recognized his voice traveling from the living room area, prompting her to swing her legs over the bed, her toes submerging into the soft carpet. She’d never been in such a fine hotel where the carpeting probably cost more than six months’ worth of rent on her one-bedroom apartment.

“Evans, I don’t give a flying fuck about any of that right now. You can handle it. I don’t care.”

Kaya contemplated remaining where she was, eavesdropping without being detected. She quickly decided against it. She’d done enough.

Her feet carried her out of the room, and she stood in the doorway where she saw he was standing against the massive window that provided a breathtaking overview of the city.

Again, she considered leaving him be, but he either had exceptional peripheral vision or caught her reflection in the window because he spun around. Kaya’s eyebrows furrowed when she realized he was still dressed in his suit, with the expectation of the jacket and dress shirt which were both discarded, leaving the white undershirt.

Uncomfortable with the way he was looking at her, more concern than that, she settled onto the sofa, pulling a decorative pillow to her chest as she crossed her legs.

“I have to go,” he spoke briefly before pulling the phone from his ear and hanging up.

Kaya swallowed. He’d yet to speak, so she took the opportunity to do so. “Still don’t believe me when I said I’m a hot mess?”

“What happened tonight, Kaya?”

“Which part?” She knew that playing coy wasn’t the best route, but she was forever stubborn and would fight until she had nothing left. “Where I ruined your evening, assaulted a millionaire, told you one of my deepest secrets, or fainted in your arms? There’s a lot.”

“All of it.”

She looked away and licked her lips. Kaya felt cornered, absolutely trapped. Emotionally. She’d always assumed being physically stuck would feel far more suffocating and frightening. She was wrong.

Kaya considered her options, though far and few in between. She could deflect. She was a master at that. She could redirect blame onto him. Call him out on even making her go on the trip, for not telling her ahead of time what to expect, maybe throw in a few insults. And lastly, the most frightening of them all, she could be honest.

That was the scariest of them all.

“I lied to you.” The words spilled out before she realized it, but Kaya accepted the fact that she was tired. There was only so much she could carry, and she’d reached her limits. “My—my parents aren’t dead. They still live in the same house in Parlier that I grew up in with Denes. He’s—he was my brother.” It felt strange talking about, verbalizing what she’d quietly struggled with for so many years. And yet, there was a peace that accompanied the release. “He was such a beautiful little boy, but….different. He didn’t talk much, life skills were….hard for him, and he had these fixations on certain things. He didn’t like change.”

“Kaya, you don’t—”

“When I was eleven, and he was eight, my parents found out they were pregnant. They’d been trying for so long….they were so happy.” She roughly wiped at her face to do away with the silent tears that fell. The crying, however, was inevitable. “One day, they had a checkup appointment, and the babysitter fell through, so they asked me to watch Denes.” She nodded slowly, reverting to the same rush of emotions she felt that day. “I was so….mad, because my friend had just gotten Guitar Hero, and I was supposed to walk down to her house so we could play it.” To that day, Kaya felt a strong surge of rage whenever she ran across a throwback picture or read an article referring to that game. It was a trigger.

“My parents promised that I could go when they returned, but I just couldn’t wait.” Her nose turned up with disgust, disgust directed 100% inward. “I just had to go play that stupid fucking game.”

“Denes loved birds. They were one of his fixations. They think—they think he saw one outside our living room window or something and walked outside to see if he could catch it because, of course, I forgot to lock the front door.” She stared off into space before closing her eyes. “I had just walked into my friend’s house when I heard someone scream like I’ve never heard a scream before.” Kaya tugged the pillow closer to her chest and lowered her head. “I ran back so fast because I thought—I thought I could help him. I thought I could save him.” Her voice cracked. “—But there was so much blood, and he was so hurt—he died in the middle of the street, bleeding, terrified, and it was all my fault.”

Chris closed his eyes and shook his head. “Kaya—”

“They never found the driver,” she added quietly, chewing on the inside of her cheek. “The shock of it all……it was too much for my mom, and she miscarried.” Kaya laughed, but there wasn’t a trace of humor. “I spiraled after Denes passed. Everything bad and terrible I could get myself into, I did. I—I skipped class, I partied, I drank, I tried drugs.” She scoffed. “I lost my virginity when I was thirteen to some guy whose name I still don’t know because I was so drunk.” She leaned back into the sofa, staring at the intricate pattern of the rug. “I just—at the time, I thought if I did enough, I could make my parents hate me, because it’s what I deserved. But for everything I tried, they kept giving me chance after chance.”

“So, then I attempted suicide, twice, and I couldn’t even do that right.” She groaned and wiped at her eyes again. The cuffs of the shirt were nearly soaked. “I realized that God or the universe or whomever clearly wanted me to suffer and to live with my guilt, but in the midst of trying to punish myself, I failed to realize that all I’d done was cause my parents more pain.”

“Day of my high school graduation, I woke up at the crack of dawn to pack up my bags, told my parents that I was going out with some friends, but I’d be home by 7—and I haven’t seen or spoken with them since.”

She clapped and lifted her hands. “And there you have it. You’ve now seen me naked; you’ve seen me cry, and now you know that I’m a murderer—”

“You’re not a murderer, Kaya,” he was finally able to complete his sentence, still very much in shock over what she’d disclosed. “And what happened to your brother wasn’t your fault.”

Chris watched her demeanor soften, shifting from her previous facetious tone to a more somber tone. “You’re just saying that to make me feel better.”

“I’m saying it because it’s the truth. You were a child.”

She shrugged sadly. “So was he.”

“That still doesn’t make it your fault.”

She turned away from where he sat across from her. She hadn’t even realized he’d moved from his initial position by the window. Untangling her legs, she moved the pillow to the side and stood in front of him. “Why are you so nice to me? You should be running for the hills.”

Chris brought his hands to her waist and pulled her in between his spread legs. “Why do you keep asking questions you already know the answers to?”

“Even after everything I’ve done?” She whispered, emotion betraying her for the umpteenth time that day. “You—you still—you still feel….like that about me?”

“You’re stubborn, impulsive, argumentative, flippant, and undoubtedly one of the most complicated women I’ve ever met.” He slowly stood up, never once breaking eye contact as he cupped her face, fingers brushing away the dampness of her flushed cheeks. “And yet, seeing you smile is the highlight of my day.”

She chuckled and nervously cleared her throat. “So, was today subpar? Like, medium light? Half-light? It all went downhill after 12pm.”

He shook his head and kissed her forehead. “You are, in fact, a hot mess.”

Her fingers grasped at his sleeves. “I really am sorry about ruining your evening.”

“You didn’t ruin my evening, Kaya.” He brought his hand to her hair, pushing back the tendrils that had fallen from her updo. “Thank you for opening to me. I know that wasn’t easy.”

“It’s a lot easier opening up my legs,” she muttered, watching as he closed his eyes. “I’m sorry—you’re right. It’s—it’s not easy, and I don’t like talking about….feelings.” Her eyes lifted as she chewed on her bottom lip. “But, I do have feelings for you.” She shut her eyes and licked her top lip. “And there’s something else I need to tell you.”

His gaze softened. “Anything.”

It was so simple, the opportunity was available, the setting was perfect. She’d already told him the hardest part, now all she had to do was tell him the rest. The problem though, was that what she’d shared hadn’t changed much. It only helped him to understand her better. It would potentially improve their relationship.

This would destroy it.

She cleared her throat again. “If you tell anyone I’m capable of crying, I will smother you in your sleep.”

He chuckled and kissed her temple. “It’s late. I’m going to shower.” He studied her. “Try not to get into any more trouble, yeah?”

She smiled softly. “I make no promises.”

He gave her side a gentle squeeze before yawning as he walked back into the bedroom. Finally alone, she fell back onto the sofa and hugged the pillow against her body. Kaya felt both disgust and frustration. If there was a perfect moment to tell him, that was it, and now it was gone.

She was running out of time

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TAGS: @islandvamp @toni9 @destinyg237 @tashawar @valkryienymph @letsshamelessqueen-m @missyperle @kpizzletrash @brittyevans @mani-lifes @amorestevens @periodtcevans @hello-therree @shegoesbyarose @lettytheletdown @yanniebunnie @iwrite4poc @nycoledon @fangurlingismyforte @babe-im-bi @amirra88 @cocoamoonmalfoy @goldenrosexx @liquorlaughslove @ljstraightnochaser @jurneesjourney @bestyums-ever84 @notacamelthatsmywife @champagnesugamama @cest-la69vie @yanniebunny5151 @goldenrosexx​

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[arsaces-of-akielos]

Visual Glossary of Ancel’s Pole Moves

This is a masterpost of pole dancing-related references in my recently completed fic, Black Light Red :D A Berencel noir AU featuring undercover detective Berenger and pole dancer Ancel.

I had a total nerd-out writing this story because I, myself, do pole dance for fitness. And I even own the exact same pole boots as Ancel in the reverse bang art this story was written for! (yes, pole boots, that shiny patent leather material gives added grip against the pole).

I love this sport both for general fitness, athleticism/acrobatics, and just looking hella cool. So I’ve compiled this visual glossary with thanks and credit to the Online Pole Studio and their move dictionary.

Oh, and with a few pictures by me (and my boots) too ;)

Firstly, a brief intro. Sport pole dancing takes the form of either static or spinning pole. Static pole is when the pole is stationary, while with a spinning pole the entire pole itself spins along an internal axis. Which one is more popular depends on where you are in the world, and there are competitions for either or both. The two forms have some moves in common but also many differences in style, especially regarding movement as you can probably imagine. I personally do spinning pole, and so went with what I’m familiar with in this story.

My move in that bonus pic, by the way, is called a Cross Knee Release.

-

Chapter 1

Abcel’s routine starts with a Hollywood Spin (see tutorial thumbnail for image):

He's described doing a Back Hook Spin:

Then lifting straight into an Invert:

Going into an Inverted Crucifix:

A note on that, it's common to tuck your knees to your chest when tilting into an invert, then extend your legs back out once you're upside-down. But since Ancel's wearing those thigh-high boots, he probably can't bend his knees as easily and would do it the entire motion with his legs straight. Which takes more core strength ;)

The mention of a move where he's suspended only by a bent knee can any variation of a leg hang. For example, an Outside Leg Hang:

Or alternatively, demonstrated by me ;)

-

Chapter 3

Ancel pushes off the floor into what I call a Corkscrew Spin, which alas the Online Pole Studio doesn't seem to have but it's basically a spin in this sideways position (video example here):

Then he does another Invert like from chapter 1 (very common move), into a Jade Split:

The mentioned move when he pulls himself with only one hand could be any one-armed spin, but I was picturing a Reverse Grab Spin:

Lifting his legs up and down past his head whilst halfway up from the ground is another description of an invert, specifically an aerial invert where you climb up first and do it off the ground (more difficult since you can't push off the ground for leverage).

Aaaand my fave, the move where he demonstrates his ;) thigh strength is a Cross Ankle Release, also called a layback:

-

Chapter 4

Ancel's first practice spin is either a Hollywood Spin from the first chapter or a Front Hook Spin, another basic move:

His more advanced move is a Shoulder Mount, which is like an invert except the pole is behind your shoulder instead of under one arm (making it harder since you can't just tip your body straight back upside-down):

From there he goes into Extended Butterfly:

Then into another Inverted Crucifix from the first chapter to slide down into a handstand.

-

Chapter 5

Ancel's routine finishes with a spinning climb, which is a normal Climb where you kick yourself into a spin on a spinning pole as you leave the floor:

His last pose, held at the top of the pole, is a Hood Ornament:

Also available demonstrated by me ;)

Featuring the aforementioned boots of mine that are the same as Ancel's. My hair colour is a bonus :P

-

And there we have it for the fic! Pole dancing is an awesome sport and I live in hope of inspiring as many people as I can to give it a try!

I’ll finish off with another bonus pic of me. The thing about this, actually, is that I took most of these reference pics right when this fic started. And I’ve been training fairly hard, so my level actually improved a significant amount in the process of writing :D So the last bonus pic, not in boots unfortunately, is a more advanced move from more recently called an Ayesha. You can wave to my my teacher in the background. 

Pole rocks, Ancel is hot ;) *blows kiss*

[aryn-the-bearheart]

Faith, Stakes, and Fairy Dust

A/N: Tumblr is being difficult and not cooperating, But because I wanted this available for Christmas, I am just going to split it into parts until I figure out what is going on with it. So this will end up being a series.

This was for @locke-writes Cinema Rewrite Challenge. It's hella late. Apologies and I hope you enjoy it!

PART 1/?

You had just gotten back from your second semester of grad school. Thankfully your chosen major had all summer off for break. You could catch up with your friends and little brother, Charley. Charley mentioned something to you at breakfast about a new neighbor moving in next door at the old, Perry House. Johnny or Jerry maybe even Jessie. To be honest, you were still half asleep and more focused on the cereal sitting on the table in front of you. Charlie waved a hand in front of your face. “Where you listening to anything I said?” You shook your head and he sighed. “Just stay away from him. He gives me the creeps.” And with that he left for Ed’s house. You spent the day reorganizing your room and trying to cram as many newly acquired books into your several bookshelves as you could manage. Near the end of the day you decided to cook dinner for your mother and brother. You left a note on the counter for them and went to visit a friend. You got back later than expected and missed seeing Charley and your mom altogether. The next morning you knocked on Charley’s bedroom door, he opened it almost immediately and pulled you inside. After a very freaked out Charley explained what was going on and why he needed you to drive him to Vegas to meet the famous stage performer, Peter Vincent, without a word you immediately put on your socks and shoes and grabbed a jacket. “Wait, you actually believe me?” You shrugged and said, “Not yet, but if your this frazzled about something, then I’ll do whatever I can to help.” During the drive to Las Vegas Charley kept bouncing his leg and shifting in his seat. After arriving on the rehearsal set for Peter Vincent’s show, Charley fashioned two press badges together from a couple newspapers and handed one to you. Both of you stood awkwardly on the side waiting for rehearsal to finish. Charley approached Peter Vincent and after some schmoozing he invited the both of you back to his penthouse for an interview. You meandered around admiring the mostly fake artifacts while Charley spoke to Mr. Vincent. You never could follow the ‘do not touch’ rules at the museum and this was no exception. After opening a polished glass display, you picked up an interesting looking stake. It had some sigils carved into it and the plaque said something about it being blessed by a saint. You carried it to where Peter Vincent and Charley were talking. You were intent on asking Mr. Vincent to pose with it for Charley’s fake newspaper article. As you walked in, Peter Vincent started yelling for his assistant. Reading the room, you slid the stake into your back pocket and decided to put it back as you left. Obviously Charley had said the wrong things and the situation was starting to escalate. Ginger waltzed past you and gently grabbed Charley by the arm. They walked past you and Peter Vincent noticed you for the first time. “How did he rope you into his lunatic plan?” You crossed your arms and shifted your weight. “He’s my little brother, you douche-canoe. And something has obviously scared him out of his mind. I thought bringing him here would reassure him, especially since he thought you were his only hope. Thanks for crushing his spirit. I’m sure your parents would be very proud of you.” You turned on your heel and followed your little brother, forgetting to return the fancy looking stake entirely. Peter watched you seethe out of the room and drained the rest of his drink. After discarding the glass he searched for some old voodoo books and artifacts. He decided to try something later that evening. What remained of his conscience was bothering him and he decided for once, to do something about it. Charley was silent for the drive back, opting to whittle away at a pre-formed stake. As soon as the car was parked in the driveway, Charley hopped out and ran up to his room. Seeing as it was almost dark, you followed him and watched as he hung garlic and crosses in his bedroom windows. “Char, is there anything I can do to help?” He flitted around the room checking the crosses, “Not really, I don’t want you involved in this. Jerry is too dangerous. Do you still have that Holy water you got from your trip to Italy?” You nodded and retreated to your room to fetch the souvenir. You doubted it was anything more than bottled tap water, but if it made Charley feel safer, you were all for him having it. You grabbed one of the pocket knives lying around your room and started to cut away the wrapping on the bottle. The doorbell rang and Charley ran downstairs. You followed him with the water bottle and knife still in your hands. Once you saw that it was Amy, you closed the pocket knife and placed it in your front pocket. You could hear your mom stop halfway on the stairs. Amy started to confront Charley about his weird behavior when they were interrupted by a knock at the door. Deciding to make her entrance your mom bounded down the rest of the stairs and said she would get the door. Charley begged her not to open it. Jerry called out from the other side of the door. You made your way to the hall closet where your mom kept one of your deadbeat dad’s old aluminum bats. Your mom wasn’t very comfortable with guns, but everyone knew how to swing said bat. Jerry accused Charley of harassing him, threatened to involve the police, and called Charley sick. You adjusted your grip on the bat and stared at the door. Your mom told him to get the cops. From where you were standing, you could see Jerry start to walk around the house. He disappeared while passing a bush and you couldn’t see him anymore. Charley rushed to the closest window and then to the next. He frantically asked,” Do you see him? Where di-.” You stopped looking for Jerry and glanced to where Charley had been, except he was no longer there. Before you could ask Amy or your mom anything, everything felt like it was twisting and turning. You could feel yourself freefalling through space. It was a dizzying sensation and you screwed your eyes shut to keep from becoming motion sick. When you felt everything stop moving, you slowly opened your eyes. Somehow, someway, you were standing in the middle of a dense jungle. Spinning in a slow circle examining your surroundings and huffed, “Shit.”

[nayu-nayu]

Can I have a NSFW Senku with a shy insecure S/O? Also congrats for your 100 followers!💗💕💕💞💗💞💕💗💞💞💖💗💕

Yes of course! ~ Thank you so much Anon!

NSFW Senku with shy and insecure S/O headcanons

- We all know that Senku is not an affectionate person.

- His S/O feels safe with him because Senku will never force them to do any uncomfortable things.

- He is totally okay if they just spend the time together and nothing more.

- S/O often thinks Senku is too hot and too handsome for them and they are unable to handle his radiance.

- S/O rejects Senku many times because they are embarrassed when he is too close to them.

- Senku doesn’t understand them first, so he won’t do anything.

- his S/O sometimes feels bad because they think they are not attractive enough, or Senku doesn’t love them enough to make a move.

- Kisses and touches are very rare. Senku literally would be okay without any physical contact if S/O doesn’t want to do it.

- But he knows that sexuality is the part of the romantic relationship, -and of course- the part of the science, so it makes him a bit curious.

- This boy is very smart so he notices that S/O really yearns for his affection, just too insecure to tells him.

- One night they are alone and watch the stars together.

- S/O knows how much Senku loves the space so when they see his happy face while he tells everything about the stars and the planets, S/O will be overwhelmed with feelings. 

- “Why am I so shy? Why can’t I tell him how much I want him?  I want to tell him…! I want to show him…!”

- S/O’s eyes fulfilled with tears as they realized this. They have a lof of anxiety but they want to fight with them.

- Senku notices that S/O is even more quiet than usual.

- He turns to S/O and he is surprised when he sees their teary eyes and blushing face.

- “S/O…?”

- “Senku—I— I really—like you–”

- Senku’s eyes widely open and suddenly feels warmth in his heart.

- He had waited for this moment. For a moment when S/O will take a step and give him a sign.

- He knows this is the perfect moment to show them how much he loves them.

- Gently touches S/O’s face and wipes their eyes.

- “Do you hate when I touch you like this?”

- “…….I’m not…against it…..”

- Senku gives them his most charming smile.

- Gentle kisses follow each other.

NSFW below!

- S/O is very shy and has a fear to show their naked body to Senku.

- Senku knows it well so it will happen in total darkness.

- Senku literally can’t see anything but he understands that S/O feels more comfortable in the darkness.

- He will use his biological knowledge to find every important place ;)

- but this is a hella difficult adventure for him.

- He will gently caress, touch, kiss S/O’s sensitive parts and listen their reactions.

- When he hears S/O’s heavy breaths and feels their shaking body he will know how much they want him.

- These sweet reactions are enough for him.

- Senku will be as gentle and careful as he can.

- The truth is that he is totally freaking out.

- He becomes completely hard because of S/O’s moans. He can barely control himself.

- But he doesn’t want to hurt the person he loves.

- “If you want me to stop, just tell me.”

- Both of them lie on their sides, facing the same direction and he enters S/O from behind.

- This position is comfortable to them because they are too shy and embarrassed to face-to-face poses.

- Senku penetrates them very slowly.

- He feels so hot inside them.

- This position allows for more skin to skin contact.

- Besides Senku has a free hand to stimulate his S/O’s sensitive parts.

- If Senku is confident enough, he will place his hands on S/O’s shoulders to increase the intensity and deepness of the thrust.

- Senku gives sweet kisses on S/O’s neck and shoulders for aftercare.

- S/O feels that all of the anxiety and shyness magically disappeared.

[agentnico]

Stowaway (2021) Review

I don’t buy it.

Plot: The crew of a spaceship headed to Mars discovers an accidental stowaway shortly after takeoff. Too far from Earth to turn back and with resources dwindling, the ship's medical researcher emerges as the only dissenting voice against the group that has already decided in favour of a grim outcome.

Consider me a cinema sinner, but I find it highly unlikely that someone would could corners during final flight checks of a highly important and most likely hella-expensive spacecraft on a mission to Mars. Like there is no way I believe that no one would have found this stowaway fellow before the ship took off. No way, like no, I refuse to accept that as a possible situation. The craft would have been checked like a gazillion times beforehand and also I’m sure in this futuristic setting people still use attendance sheets and clock ins. Right before the flight took off a certain Jerry would have took out a clipboard, or okay, its the future, he’d probably be using an iPad 100, but regardless, he’d be like “right chaps, I’m gonna call out everyone’s name and ensure everyone’s here and not accidentally fallen behind on this ship here that is about to fly on a 2 year journey to ye old Mars baby over there in the sky, as this is a highly important and expensive mission and we cannot be guilty of making any silly mistakes. Right, is John here? Good. Richard, yep. Chloe, cool. Terry, hi there Terry, hey our names rhyme, we should go for a pint after! Right, David. And Michael? Where’s Michael? No Michael here? Where was Michael seen last? Ah, he was fixing up some wires in the ship? Okay, see, I knew Michael would still be up there, he’s a clumsy silly sausage he is, let’s go get him!” And end of story. Voila! So yeah, I don’t buy it. No sir. So much so that I’m going to leave this Grumpy Cat (RIP) meme here...

However that being said, let’s just accept that all the folks behind the set up of this Mars mission are cretinous imbeciles who allowed this mistake to occur for the sake of this movie existing. So we end up with this psychological drama of this crew in space stuck with this difficult choice, and this posed moral dilemma in itself was actually quite interesting if you ignore the set up towards it. It’s the common question of how much does a single human’s life matter? Socrates would have a ball watching this movie! Or at least I think he would. I don’t know, my knowledge of Socrates is limited to Assassin’s Creed: Odyssey (huge shout out to my amazing girlfriend for recommending me that awesome game!) and in that game Socrates spends a lot of time contemplating my kill count and the deeper meaning behind each life that my Kassandra took. Safe to say I completely ignored Socrates and made my Kassandra a full fledged murderer with a lust for blood, blood and, you guessed it, more blood! 

Anyway, moving on from my psychotic video game tendencies, Stowaway is actually a very self contained movie, and even though its set out there in the big open space of our solar system, we don’t actually get to enjoy that many big visual set pieces we’ve grown accustomed to thanks to recent space epics Interstellar, The Martian, Ad Astra and First Man to name a few. Instead for the majority of the film we spend time with the characters inside the the ship’s main carrier. The film tries to play as a big character study, however here’s the thing, you don’t really care about any of the characters. Each individual has their one or two characteristics and background points, but overall your sympathies for these people will rely exclusively on your opinions of these actors. If you are a fan of them, you will enjoy seeing them and root for them, however if you have no interest in these actors then the characters they play you’ll give zero care about. For example, Anna Kendrick is perfectly okay as the ship’s medic, and her on-screen presence is a welcome one, however couldn’t tell you hardly anything about the character she plays other than her name is Zoe. I think. Is it Zoe? I could go on IMDb and confirm this but somehow I don’t think I want to.

I should also mention that this film is filled to the brim with plot holes. Yes, the movie tries to use a lot of scientific terms as an excuse to confuse us and buy into the story and all the stuff that occurs, but thinking it over I have to admit this movie does not make sense. From the oxygen problem to the lack of prep for this mission and also the outcome at the end, it’s all a mess. Speaking of the outcome, this film has a monumentally abrupt ending. It simply stops. Yes, a certain major plot point occurs, however it leaves the story as a whole completely unresolved. It’s more like this thing happens, and you’re like “oh damn!” and then out of nowhere credits overtake the screen and you’re like “wait what?”. It just ends. It just ends as if the producers realised they’ve wrote themselves into a dead end and simply accepted it. So we get this build up that akums to a suspenseful piece of nothing. Some lovely scenes, competent acting and elegant special effects are not enough to make this movie worth your time. That being said there is a certain sequence to the end of this movie which was actually really suspenseful and actually had me, as cringe as it sounds, at the edge of my seat. It actually made me really motion sick and nauseous from the tension of it all, so I have to give props to that scene. Otherwise, yeah, as stated previously - I don’t buy it. 

Overall score: 4/10

[virtual-toast]

Scream Queens VH1 recap - Season 1 Episode 2

Michelle, Sarah, Kylah, and Jessica come back from the grand ballroom and the rest of the girls are shocked and/or pissed that Jo-Anne went home instead of Kylah. Lindsay says “This house will mourn the loss of Jo-Anne” and Sarah, in tears, calls her “such a sensational actress”, which are both super melodramatic reactions, you knew Jo-Anne for three days, but okay. Meanwhile Kylah has no idea why everyone is upset that she’s still there haha.

The following day sees Kylah declaring the house has been divided into the “queen bitches” (herself, Michelle, Lina, and Angela) and the “more homely girls” (Marissa, Lindsay, and Sarah). I’m assuming she’s put Tanedra and Jessica in the latter category too but she doesn’t mention them specifically. The bitchy girls talk shit about the other girls behind their backs, specifically about how they think Sarah didn’t deserve to win the previous episode, that she’s ugly and annoying, etc.

The girls meet up with Shawnee who tells them they have 15 minutes to dress themselves up and impress a casting director (Kelly Wagner, who seems pretty cool tbh) with the winner getting a guaranteed callback. While getting ready, Michelle and Angela mention that if the winner is not one of the bitchy girls, the competition must be rigged. An awful lot of confidence for week 2, lol.

The girls go back into the room with Shawnee and meet Kelly. They take turns doing a sort of one on one interview / audition, which I’m gonna summarise in dot points because they each get a small amount of screen time:

Lindsay talks about being a child actor and Kelly says that means she probably actually has a harder job than someone just starting out. Lindsay is wearing a weird sort of frilly top and skirt with polka dots but it somehow doesn’t really work for her shape, and Kelly mentions it as well as Shawnee straight up calling her frumpy. True, but also, rude.

Lina goes up and immediately shakes Kelly’s hand. She doesn’t even get a word out before Kelly is like “yeah no, don’t shake casting directors’ hands, personal space / germs” etc.

Kylah talks about playing Price is Right with her brother which Kelly says is a bad choice because she’s automatically associating herself with being a model rather than an actress. Kylah proceeds to mention that she wants to “get ugly, get dirty, like Halle Berry did in Monster.” cringe

Marissa gets up and starts off on this huge spiel about how horror films are like modern Greek tragedies and everyone is just staring at her like GIRL WHAT.

Michelle introduces herself and Kelly asks if she primarily does theatre because of her big personality. Michelle proceeds to brag about being Miss Teen Texas.

Jessica is wearing a smart-casual outfit of jeans and a simple white top with her trademark giant hoop earrings. Kelly comments on her look being unique. Jessica is kinda speaking like a cute little girl who doesn’t want to let the evil out??

Angela mentions how she thinks she has the stereotypical horror “look”. Her outfit isn’t relevant but I have to mention it anyway - it honestly looks like she cut the top off a blue evening gown to wear as a shirt?? and then just jeans. Like idk.

Sarah introduces herself and Kelly immediately comments on her unique nasally voice.

Tanedra tells Kelly that she has no formal training. Kelly says “And you think you can beat out all these girls?” and Tanedra’s like YES. Fuck yeah get it girl.

So Kelly goes ahead and gives her overall impressions - Kylah has no personality, Angela has the best horror look, Lindsay looks like the best friend rather than the leading lady, Marissa is the one she didn’t remember, and she liked Jessica’s personal style. Ultimately she gives Jessica the guaranteed callback, and also sends Lindsay and Marissa for makeovers which Michelle finds hilarious.

The girls go back into the house and Kylah proceeds to have a tantrum about not winning, stating that if the casting director was a man the results would have been different. But get this, she DOES NOT CHANGE EXPRESSION THE ENTIRE TIME. Even when she’s yelling “I’M ABOUT TO CRY” she literally just has this blank look on her face like is she actually made of wax?? Meanwhile Lindsay and Marissa have their makeovers, Lindsay gets a cool short reverse A-line bob cut and looks really badass, while Marissa gets her hair dyed jet black and cut in choppy layers. It looks fine but you can tell by her face Marissa is not happy.

The girls go to Homa’s class and since the week is all about first impressions, they have to do freeze frame shots of particular expressions, I guess so they can see what they actually look like vs. what they think they look like or something. Most of the girls do pretty well, Tanedra kills it again, Marissa bombs, and Kylah once again LITERALLY DOES NOT CHANGE EXPRESSION. What the fuck.

Back at the house the girls are all gushing over Lindsay and Marissa’s makeovers, Michelle voices her jealousy despite earlier thinking it was hilarious, and Angela is mad that she’s no longer the only one with her “look”, even though she and Marissa don’t look the same at all, the only similarity is the colour of their hair?? Marissa goes and has a cry about her hair because she’s now lost all her confidence and honestly it’s actually kinda sad / hard to watch.

The next day they find one of the rooms in the house has been filled with creepy dolls and of course one of them is actually a person that jumps out and scares them because omg what a funny prank haha. The “doll” tells them their director’s challenge is a photoshoot which many of the girls are stoked about. They’re basically given generic horror themes and have to shoot the poster. Dot points again!

Lina gets “Tie Die” and her costume is literally a length of rope that’s wrapped around her. She immediately cracks the shits and goes into full blown diva mode, complaining about her costume, how apparently difficult her theme is compared to other girls, telling the makeup and hair people how to do their jobs, etc. Whaaaaat, Lina is a bitch?? This is brand new information!! Unfortunately she still does a really good job with the photoshoot.

Lindsay gets “Blinded By the Fright” and her costume is a hospital gown and white contact lenses, which she has difficulty putting in but is EXTREMELY polite about it with the makeup lady (a nice juxtaposition to Lina’s bitch fest). Lindsay also does really well in the photoshoot.

Kylah gets “Thin Skin” which she comments sounds like a porno, lmao. Her costume is literally just black liquid latex painted all over her body and the other girls are fucking FROTHING with jealously. Kylah proceeds to completely bomb the challenge, giving absolutely no emotion and James literally has no idea how to direct her.

Michelle gets “Don’t Go in the Water” and is basically just wearing a bikini, but then James dumps a bottle of cold water all over her. She does really well in the photoshoot.

Sarah gets “Blood Skate”, her costume is just a bloody ice skating outfit, and she does okay.

Tanedra gets “Prom Scream”, she is wearing a bloody prom dress, and she does really well.

Jessica gets “The Butcher’s Girl” and she’s literally wearing a hat, gloves, no shirt, just an apron and shorts? And there’s blood? This one confuses me. She does okay.

Angela gets “Monster’s Wedding” which some of the other girls (correctly) complain is SUPER easy - she’s literally in a wedding dress posing with a bloody hand prop. She does fine but I mean all she has to do is stand there and smile??

Marissa gets “Mummy Maker” and she’s wrapped in what I assume are bandages but it looks like toilet paper? She’s pretty covered, including the bottom half of her face, and she’s supposed to be seductive but honestly it kinda just feels like an awkward interpretive dance??

The next day back at the house, Marissa vents to the other girls about her insecurity with her new hair. Like I know it’s just hair but it’s kinda sad, they completely changed her look which obviously fucks with her confidence. The girls get their photoshoot posters and everyone is stoked except Marissa (rightfully) and Lindsay, who basically has an anxiety attack and hates hers even though everyone is telling her how great it is. Whoo boy I relate to Lindsay so hard. Jessica reads the list which summons Marissa, Kylah, Lindsay, and Lina to the grand ballroom. They all think they’re at the bottom except Lina, who of course thinks she’s top shit.

In the grand ballroom, Lina gets pulled forward and despite doing well in the challenge, the judges straight up read her for being a bitch, which is hella satisfying let me tell you. Lindsay gets pulled forward and the judges tell her that she did an awesome job and that she needs to go easier on herself, before awarding her the week’s leading lady. Marissa and Kylah are predictably the bottom two, Marissa gets told she’s overthinking everything and Kylah just that she’s completely emotionless. Kylah gets the axe and Marissa lives another week.

Stay tuned for Season 1 Episode 3!

[risottostitties]

Hi! First time here to ask haha! Any HCs for La squadra with an Otaku s/o? Like she watches anime and even buys merch in secret cuz she's scared they might find her hobby lame and immature? (Also,what will be their fave anime? And genre?)

Oh boy let me tell you I have some THOUGHTS about these boys and their taste in anime

La Squadra with an Otaku s/o

Risotto 

at first he’s gonna be kinda confused, not gonna lie. Growing up the only ‘anime’ he knew was like, Pokemon and Dragon Ball Z but at that point he was too old to really get into Pokemon, and he never considered DBZ anime because it aired next to cartoons and stuff.

But that doesn’t mean he won’t appreciate s/o and their good taste. He’s the kind of guy who wants to learn about what interests the people he loves, and he loves you. So he’d honestly enjoy late nights spent binge watching your favorites.

Comes to realize that DBZ was low key his gym goals for the early years of him working out. If you bought him a ‘Swole like Goku’ tank he’d probably wear it to lift in, ngl.

Knowing your favorites he’d probably look to merch for his go to birthday or Christmas gifts. Considering the hobbies and interests of some of his co-workers, a scantily clad waifu figure is honestly a welcome change of pace.

Depending on the style or aesthetic of the anime (ie, is it goth) he would be down to couples cosplay, although he wouldn’t be comfortable with you posting pictures of his face or any identifiable features of him online

His fave is probably the original Dragon Ball Run, followed very closely by DBZ for the nostalgia bit. Something deep like Full Metal Alchemist (Brotherhood and the original) would also appeal to him

Is also a big fan of Beserk, disappointed by the anime. And Vinland Saga, not disappointed by the anime.

Partial to Princess Mononoke as well. He likes some Ghibli films, isn’t afraid to admit it. Thinks the score for Spirited Away is bomb af.

Prosciutto

Prosciutto doesn’t really get it at first either. Honestly? He probably didn’t know the difference between cartoon and anime until you explained it to him.

Unlike Risotto he might be a bit more judgey if you try to get him to watch some with you. So you gotta hit him with the real classics. 

But similarly to Risotto, he at least makes an effort to try and indulge in the things you like. He might not be as patient, but he tries.

Probably wouldn’t do cosplay himself, but would hunt down exclusive seasonal merch to gift you. He’d take careful stock of your collections and do some research to pick out only the finest figurines and posters for you.

Would buy that hella expensive premium bandai apparel for you too, might even pick something subtle up for himself if he really liked the show it came from.

Also back on the cosplay note, if you agreed he’d find the highest quality cosplay possible and have you model some of his favorites for him.

(In particular if you were comfortable in fem clothing, Faye Valentine gets him going)

He loves Cowboy Beebop. 100%, wants to watch it again as soon as it ends. Everything from the characters to the story to the music and the fliud animation that has aged like fine wine appeals to him. Prosciutto is a man who likes the finer things in life. He oozes class. Cowboy Beebop oozes class and prestige.

Also likes Maasaki Yuasa. It was his idea to go see The Night Is Short, Walk on Girl in theaters.

In general his tastes tend to lean towards arthouse type anime or bona fide classics.

Pesci

Pesci knows anime and has been doing his absolute best to keep it a secret from the rest of the gang because they already tease him enough.

He’s one of those secret weebs, you gotta know where to look. Your best bet is to look at his accessories. Is there a watch with a certain symbol from an anime you recognize? A lanyard with a familiar print? Something subtle that isn’t immediately noticed by people not looking for it.

He has a secret box in his room full of blue rays from his faves. He watches them sometimes when he’s home alone. There’s nothing X rated in there obviously, he just doesn’t want people to know.

Thank god he has you.

The two of you probably bonded pretty fast over your mutual love of anime. Hell, you being such an open and proud Otaku probably gave him a bit of confidence in expressing his interests too.

Yall are the weeb couple. Yall definitely go to conventions together. Couples Cosplays, the whole thing.

He’s a sucker for Shonen just as much as he is for the really good heart wrenching painful ones. 

He watches Boruto because he loves Naruto so much.

He would also tear up at Clannad.

Dango Daikazoku triggers almost a pavlovian response of heart ache.

So does Secret Base.

Ano Hana is probably his favorite, although even you’d need to pry it out of him. Its one thing that Prosciutto gives him shit for liking anime, its a whole different ball game if he found out Pesci liked girly anime

Fromaggio

He knows what hentai is. That’s about as far as his knowledge went before yall got together.

He thinks its pretty interesting though, so he’d be down to watch some with you.

Turns out he really likes action shonen. He got really, really into One Piece. Like, instantly. He likes the fact there’s so much to watch/read before he’s caught up too.

Another boy that would couples cosplay and be really into it. Especially if it continued into the bedroom.

He’s pretty go with the flow, so he isn’t picky about what y’all watch. Even if it isn’t his cup of tea he’ll sit through a few episodes on a night with you.

Fromaggio can’t tell the difference between a high quality figure and a shitty one. Its a crap shoot what he buys for you. Its more a process of ‘oh, so likes this character’ rather than checking the seams and paint quality and how dynamic the pose is/interchangeable parts. 

Definitely buys way too much in the dealers room because of this.

He tries his best.

His fave is probably One Piece, liked bleach a lot but never read the manga, Yu Yu Hakusho is another one he really enjoyed. The Dark Tournament arc had him at the edge of his seat and hype as shit.

Illuso

Had a passing knowledge of anime before dating you. Knew what it was, saw a few of the mainstream ones, thought they were enjoyable, moved on with his life.

Your dedicated interest in anime would surprise him at first, because he always figured it was kind of a niche thing.

Would snoop around your collection of manga/figures/plushes in the mirror world while you sleep.

Winds up reading a lot of your manga like that (he’s good at reading in reverse because of his stand)

He finds he appreciates the art style of 80s-90s manga a lot more than he does the modern stuff. He really got into Ranma 1/2 and thinks Rumiko Takahashi’s artstyle is excellent.

If you asked him to watch Inuyasha with you he wouldn’t say no.

Probably wouldn’t want to do couples cosplay, but he definitely has an appreciation for you in cosplay.

You could talk him into going to a con if you caught him in the right mood. It’d be a hard sell though.

Has a surprising enjoyment for J-Rock. 

Inuyasha is high on his favorites list, as is Ranma 1/2. Also a fan of Ghibli movies although its pulling teeth to get him to admit it.

Melone

This man has watched so much hentai in his life.

He probably actually knows them by title honestly.

He enjoys anime too, and is not ashamed unlike Pesci. Everyone already knows he has unconventional tastes there is nothing to hide here.

Melone enjoys traditionally feminine anime, especially Sailor Moon. That one has a special place in his heart as he has memories of his sister watching it with him when he was much younger.

Its more of a decompress thing than anything else, so he doesn't tend to favor heavy anime with dense plot and more mature subject matter.

He likes Maid Costumes. On you, on him, it doesn’t matter.

Doesn’t know a whole lot about merch and what makes something higher quality but he learns fast. Between you and him the Dealers Room at cons won’t know what hit them.

Is the type to preorder a figure he knows you’d like. And maybe one for him.

Buy him this and he’s putty in your hands for a month straight (SFW don’t worry) https://www.amazon.com/Bandai-Sailor-Moonlight-Memory-Locket/dp/B00UA9XB48

Sailor Moon is his favorite as I’ve said before, his favorite sailor scout is Rei. Is also a fan of Ano Hana, Violet Evergarden, and Toradora although he needs to be in the right mood to watch them.

Ghiaccio

He went down the Fate rabbit hole and we haven’t seen him since.

The gender bending grates as his soul but he is addicted regardless. There’s just so much dense lore that he can’t seem to stop going.

But also seeing how much care and attention is paid to the historical background of a lot of the servants is intriguing to him. Its the perfect blend of accurate and harem trash that infuriates him but also leaves him needing to know more.

He hasn’t played every game but he has Grand Order on his phone and has sunk an ungodly amount of money into the gacha trying to get his favorite (Its Jeanne Alter, in case anyone was wondering) and has seen all the anime (His favorite is the cooking spin off because its surprisingly calming to watch)

Fate Zero is probably his favorite ‘serious’ Fate adaptation. He enjoys the gravitas of the Holy Grail Wars (and hates how it was tossed out the fucking window in UBW/Stay Night/Heavens Feel) and the ritual aspect to the summoning and foreshadowing of future events as well as hints at a deeper magical lore in the universe hit all the right spots in his lizard brain.

The fact every fate anime has a different version of Saber (or a Saber Clone) pisses him off too.

He really loves Fate. And will scream about it for hours at you.

Getting him to watch or talk about anything else is like pulling teeth but he eventually relents because he loves you.

Its difficult to get through a single episode without him grumbling about something or another, but he tries once he sees its important to you. He does his best not to outright insult your favorite anime.

Can appreciate high quality merch as well, probably collects Jalter Figures himself.

If you’re comfortable in fem clothing, Cosplay Jalter for him and he will literally ascend then and there. Keeps pics on his phone. Would probably make it his background. He’s weak

Outside of Fate he finds he enjoys high fantasy shows. Historical fantasy pisses him off too much, and straight up historical drama would also have him grasping for inaccuracies.

Full Metal Alchemist is a non-fate series that he really loves because of the world building. The movie Maquia was one he enjoyed as well. Likes every Miyazaki film, don’t tell anyone. Cried (and raged) when Ushio died in Clannad.

In general he just likes really good world building. It has to be good otherwise he’s going to spend the whole time picking it apart.

[queerchoicesblog]

A Few Words On Pride Month 2020

So, pride month has come at last. No matter how crazy it sounds right now as we're experiencing first-hand one of those events that will end up in history handbooks one day.

I'll be honest, it's quite difficult for me to talk about it now when everything that is not Mrs Rhona releted seems so well less relevant than it was before. But I want to share a few words that most likely nobody will read but I'll let them flow anyway.

I watch that video every single year during pride month. It's from a series I liked quite a lot back then, it's called Sense8. The character speaking is a trans woman, an lgbtq+ hacktivist, reminiscing her disastrous relationship with her transphobic mother yet finding strength in her own sorrow. There is a passage I love:

Today I'm marching to remember that I'm not just a me

But I'm also a we

And we march with pride

These words resonate with me: they summarise perfectly the deep empathy and acceptance that I feel should make us stick together. Both inside the lgbtqa+ community and as human beings: "I am a human being, and thus nothing human is alien to me". I'm quoting by heart a Latin playwright named Terentius (Terence in English, I guess?) so forgive me if I got something wrong but what I mean is...we should all care about each other because no matter our differences, our sexuality or color of skin or class, we are human. We are brothers and sisters: I'm an only child but I believe that the definition of a healthy family is one where people overcome differences that don't truly matter in the end, they don't define us as worthy or unworthy of love and respect which should always be given to another human being.

Unless there are valid reasons not to.

As the latest happenings in the world have shown, a hard truth we all know has been reinforced: we live in a cruel, unfair world where, as Nomi said, "hating isn't a sin on that list and neither is shame". A world where people get hurt or killed for reasons which can be hardly called a motive for violence: not being white, not being rich enough, being different, holding a hand or kissing a person of the same sex in the street.

We may comfort ourselves saying these fears were past fears, last century or even Victorian age fears but no, they're still out there. And we can't turn a blind eye.

The current pandemic added new ones, making our lives even more miserable. Speaking of the lgbtqa+ community, I think I can say the social distancing is hitting even harder. Does anybody feel lonelier now? I rise my hand, I do. I'm not referring to the fact that pride parades are cancelled (because we all know there is a freaking valid reason atm), but getting in touch with other people is way harder now. In my personal experience, getting in touch with fellow lgbtqa+ folks was rare even before the pandemic, now it's hella tough. In the street we hide our faces behind masks and don't have the same careless attitude we used to display. Shaking hands and even the lightest touch or proximity are not allowed under the new restrictions: a few weeks ago, over here a couple was charged for hugging each other in the street. How sad and dystopic are these times we live in...

Virtual meetings can help but they're not like in person meetings: the warmth of personal interaction is simply not there. We try but it's not there. Couples are separeted by lockdown rules and so are some families. Lgbtqa+ hotlines are a saving grace and I cannot stress enough how important they are and how anyone struggling with their mental health or literally anything concerning themselves, their gender and sexuality should feel free to contact those volunteers who are a blessing restoring a little faith in humanity.

My thoughts are for those of us who got stuck quarantining with homophobic/biphobic/transphobic etc parents or roommates, and those stuck in abusive contexts. Yes, even relationships because - I know I'll be super unpopular saying this but we can't lie especially to the minor or vulnerable ones- lgbtqa+ relationships can be abusive and toxic too. As I said, we're human and I am sick and tired of the honeyed sunshine rhetoric of lgbtqa+ people and love as an ever right and righteous safe haven. It is a safe haven for us to some extent but we must acknowledge there are problematic issues in our community. We have to be honest with each other especially for the sake not only of each other but for the vulnerable ones and the young. Like criticising or reporting abusers, predators, rapists and so on don't make us all filthy creatures who will burn on a stake for our abominable sins. It just makes us responsible and looking out for each other.

We spend so long dreaming of finding someone of the same sex to be with that when someone shows us any sign of affection our feelings for them grow fast, even when red flags or abuse enter our lives. We stay because we're hungry for love and crave what straighties seem to get so easily: love, acceptance, reciprocity. To the young and everyone who needs to hear this I wanna say: it doesn't have to be like that. Don't ever settle for cheap love only because you feel you will lose your only chance to be loved. There are good people out there too and you deserve one of them at your side. You will find them, your paths will cross: just be patient and never ever forget the importance of respect and consent.

To all those experiencing anything like the relationships or toxicity I mentioned, who feel silenced by the sunshine rhetoric, I say: you are not alone, stay strong and you did nothing wrong, others did and I'm sorry you're going through this cause you don't deserve it.

I share a similar shutout to those struggling with mental and/or physical disorders. If you ever felt pretty much invisible, you're not. I see you, many others see you and we're all rooting for you. You're stronger than you think and you're beautiful.

The not-as-unfortunate-as-the abovementioned but still quite forlorn are the star crossed lovers meeting that special someone in a bad time. Quarantine will see the blossoming of some romances but also takes no prisoners, blowing off others. They don't vanish though, in most cases they turn into those impossible loves and what if we love so much in the movies and hate in real life. I wish I could lay a blanket or pull into a tight hug all those going through this. Your pain is not irrelevant even if there are worst things in the world right now, our souls hurt for things like that. I hold your shaking hand wherever you are as you stare blankly at your phone, waiting for a message or a call that will never come, or you reminisce, listening to a romantic playlist you still have saved on your device. Your suffering is my suffering.

On a brighter side, cause I don't wanna be a complete downer, the luckiest ones among us are blessed with love and I can't be any happier for you, whoever you are. I can picture the one day a few years from now when I will be talking to someone and they will share their story saying how they met the love of their life during the pandemic. How it wasn't easy at first because of all the uncertainty and fears but they kept trying and it all started with a social distancing date at a park or via Zoom. You lucky ones, cherish that and never take what you have for granted: the love you feel and that special someone is showing you is a balsam in hard times. Please cherish it dearly and never stop loving: one day you'll warm these old bones and lonely heart if we ever get the chance to cross path.

Actually I don't have any more wisdom to share, granted what I wrote can be called wisdom, nor giveaway. I considered doing a lgbtqa+ one in honor of the pride month but I feel nobody would be interested. Or at least not by me and I fully agree: writing is getting hard and I feel like I risk of ruining everything I dedicate myself to, as I usually do in my life. I'll follow the tips of a few anons (I think?) and devote this month to educate myself over aspects, nuances or realities I am not fully familiar with: so I'll watch Pose and Sex Education. Hopefully I'll learn something new that might make me a better human being.

Feel free to share further advice: books, articles, movies, series, documentaries...you name it! Drop a message or an ask and I'll make what I'm starting now a lasting project!

That is my advice: if you're stuck inside with nothing much to do this month, find something that might enrich you, even a little thing, and go for it.

As well as reminding yourself the usual stuff: you are not wrong nor unlovable, you're not offensive or dirty for being attracted to your same sex or both or none. Not to quote Lady Gaga, but it's truly is that simple: you are born and beautiful this way.

Stay safe and stay strong, my darlings 🏳️‍🌈

Love,

E.

[peterjonesparker]

y’all I've started the next update for the coupon fic! have had a fucking hellacious couple weeks (#postgradlyfe #9to5ormaybe7lyfe) but someone left a super sweet comment n I felt super content so I started writing it. I also read through other drafts I'd had for other story ideas that I thought were funny so I'm gonna SHARE one.

the TEN (!!!) step guide to seducing peter parker

i.                winking!!?!

Lol michelle is a dork and she tries winking and throwing her hair over her shoulder and peter’s just like “mj are you okay? is your neck hurting? Do you need a massage?” and she’s internally just like nah I need you to put your dick in me thanks. But she gets a neck massage anyway and makes sure to groan as extra as she can

ii.              selFIES

sending sexy selfies, perfect. So she sends a selfie of her doing a kissy face bc that should get the hint across. But nah. “lol, are you mocking me??” next attempt: selfie of her in a dressing room at target trying on a pretty dress (and it’s short too!) “oh wow, are you gonna buy it??” so THEN she’s just like fuck it and sends a selfie of herself in bed with a shirt on and her underwear but no pants and he’s just like “must be cold! Lol” fuck her life.

iii.             clothES SHOPPING

okay so maybe in person is best. So they go shopping for clothes. And then mj tries on the shortest, sexiest clothes she can and asks peter’s opinion. Trying to get a “it’s hot” but nah. He’s just “oh, I like that blue.” “idk how practical that is but it’s pretty” “wow, that neckline works really well for you” and it’s like how are you my boyfriend??

iv.             bathiNG suiT by the POOL!!!

Nearly naked by the pool! Perfect! Peter my sunscreen. Get my back. Peter imma turn over and undo this can you make sure everything is okay. making poses when she can. peter do you like this bathing suit??? Absolutely nothing. “yeah it’s cool! Not gonna protect you when I totally kick your ass in marco polo” he’s too wholesome oh my god

v.              Send a winky face ;)

“That’s not the only thing I’d like in me ;)”

“lol, ahaha. Wow, what a typo amirite??? That could have been so dirty ahaha”

YOU’VE GOT TO BE KIDDING ME

vi.             perFUME

guaranteed to make your man go crazy !!! perfect

“ugh, what is that horrible smell???”

vii.           TOUCH HIM

She literally grabs his dick when they’re at dinner one day and he’s just like “ooooh, watch your hands ahaha. Wow, imagine what might have happened haha. Be careful! My leg is right here babe”

viii.          Eat a popsicle

Sexily eating a popsicle, sliding it in and out of her mouth. Etc. “babe, you got a little something something on your chin here”, wiping away a drip of popsicle and mj just DYING INSIDE

ix.             Tight clothes!

Ass on full display. Boobies highlighted. Walks over to peter, dances around him, drags her chest across his back, etc. “new outfit, babe??”

x.              Fuck it this is impossible

“oh my fucking god, peter, I need you to fuck me, mmkay??”

peter: shook and hella turned on

peter: yes, of course. Whatever the fuck you say. Your wish is my command. I will do this thing for you. I will do you for you, ahaha. Damn. Fuck. Fuck. Okay. okay, okay, shit. Okay we are gonna have sex right now. I’m chill. I’m cool. It’s all good.

Mj: peter

Peter: yeah?

Mj: shut the fuck up and put your dick in me

yeah that’s my outline process so now y’all know why it’s DIFFICULT for me to write shit. because I’m pretty shit at planning out a whole story. regardless, wanted to update y’all so you know I've STARTED the chapter. also lmk if I should remove the spideychelle tag. do not wanna spam but thought maybe is relevant.

[shanie-the-toyaddict]

SHANIE’S ACTION FIGURE UPDATE! 11/03/2020

Top Figure – Romana I (Doctor Who) Second Row – Ivar Elite 80, Mia Yim Basic 113, Io Shirai Elite 79 Third Row – Charlotte Ultimate Edition 6, Bayley Elite 80 Bottom Figure – The Rock Ultimate Edition 6

SO! Time for another figure update!

These are all figures I got at the end of Oct, plus one yesterday (The Rock) There was a bit of a drought there for a while, as I was saving up for a large order all at once. But I received all of these in a week's time and wanted to make one big update for all of them.  

Let me start off by saying that I’m stoked about the Romana figure. It’s not perfect, by a long shot, (that head is a bit iffy, although I’ve seen on youtube that it’s not the sculpt it’s the paint,) but the creation of the unique tunic for her gives me great hope for the future of the line. We haven’t had this much detail put into a companion figure since Oswin Oswald back in 2014, I think I said? Naturally we did have a couple wonderful Missy figures there, but for companions? It’s been nothing but repaints for over half a decade. The specific detail for this Romana makes me think there’s hope for the entire Character Options line... unless the figure is a repaint of someone I’m not aware of. I don’t think though, the tunic is too perfect to the episode. If I’m wrong correct me, but I don’t think I am.

Moving on to the WWE Figures... well, first of all, I *will* be repainting Ivar’s beard. In E80, they gave both Ivar and Erik solid black beards and, again correct me if I’m wrong, both their beards are BROWN. (This is the exact opposite issue of the Kevin Owens figure from that set who for some reason they made a redhead. It piques my shipper interest, but my OCD is screaming) It should be noted that I will be getting Erik, but he was on backorder when I bought this shipment, so he’s coming whenever the next lot gets ordered.

Mia Yim is trash. I only picked her up because I don’t see us getting a Mia elite any time soon. Maybe I can put my Nikki Cross mask on her and pretend she’s in Retribution.

Io is pretty snazzy, but I didn’t like her coat, so she’s getting displayed like this. Not much to say there, solid figure, moving on.

Now, the Horsewomen. First of all, I’m not a fan of Charlotte. However, this figure is GORGEOUS. Finally, we got a headsculpt that looks like Charlotte (a huge plus) and a good robe to go with it. The only thing I wish they could have done better was the detail on the robe. I know that detail on soft goods is hella difficult but that robe she wore was so beautiful and this one is just... pink. If her costume underneath wasn’t designed to match the pink robe, I’d put the old Elite robe on the UE instead. It didn’t have the collar, but it was at least shiny with a lining. I feel they skimped out on the robe here. Bayley, however... well, the face scan isn’t perfect and can go either way. From some angles, it works. Other, like this one, she has troll face. Bayley is a beautiful woman and by trying to give her a smirking expression, they made her kind of ugly. But it’s an improvement over her old figures by default of being updated and I’m posing her with the axe from her Heel look debut (which was included) and the SD women’s belt (which was not).

Finally, that brings us to the last figure and HOLY CRAP IS THAT AMAZING!

I wish I had the ingenuity, skill, and resources to do a full photoshoot of the UE Rock figure because it’s gorgeous. Damn near perfect. The only tiny pieces of criticism I have is that the sideburns need the True FX effect, the Brahma Bull on the shirt is too big, and he needs track pants. However, that last one is fully fixable as I have a spare pair of track pants laying around from a Shane custom I tried (and failed) to make. So, once I find the baggie they’re in, The Rock is getting pants. Other than that, it’s a stellar figure, 9.5 out of 10. The only figure I have nicer is the UE Cena from the previous set. All in all, some decent figures, but outside of the Rock figure, they could all use some work. Once I give Ivar a fresh coat of paint, he’ll be great. I don’t have the skill to repaint Romana, so she’ll just stay as she is. The rest will just go on my shelf as is (other than giving The Great One his pants). I plan on making an order soon for Elite 81, plus the few E80 and before figures I still need. One of those will be the updated KO figure, although, like the Viking Raiders, Kev is getting a dye job. Anyway, that does it for this week's edition of Shanie’s Action Figure Update! Stay tuned in about three weeks for another edition. Same crap blog, same crap hellsite.