#the sound effects wouldn't make much sense to be said the way they are if everyone's in their own language

[3hks]

How to Write an IMPACTFUL Backstory

Honestly, writing and reading about backstories is probably one of my favorite parts of a character's story! It's a strong foundation for a character's goals, motives, thoughts, and actions! Its most powerful effect, on the other hand, is its ability to change one's view on a character. So, then, how do we write such an impactful past?

For beginners, the more tragic the backstory, the better. While this does hold some truth, let me re-iterate that it's for beginners. The idea behind it is that a pure, devastatingly pitiful backstory is unique and pulls at your reader's heartstrings. Unfortunately, instead, we're left with an origin story that feels superficial, overly-dramatic, unnecessary, and shallow. However in this post, I will give you some tips on how to avoid creating such 2D backgrounds and actually bring your character's past to life!

First, your character's backstory can be made with whatever components you choose, but the key is that you must balance them out correctly. Additionally, the majority of the time, you do want their story to stick out, so I suggest trying to come up with something original! It's much harder than it sounds, but honestly, every other protagonist has dead parents at this point. Be creative, add details, and don't be afraid to let your character go through things if you feel that it's fitting!

Second, don't extend their past for too long. The point of introducing the backstory is to elaborate on a (few) certain event(s) that affected your character the most and forever changed their lives. Keep it centered around one, or at most, a couple events.

Next, most writers tend to use sadness and/or to fuel the character, but it should not be overbearing and excessive. Alternatively, it should feel GENUINE. Not dramatic, but genuine. Different genres do form different types of backstories, yes, but the core concept behind it should be something natural. It should be something that your readers will be able to understand; something authentic. They should feel some sense of relatability, even if it's just a little. This could be like family issues, broken friendships, betrayals, leaving someone, mental struggles, loneliness, etc. Complexity can surround these concepts, but the basic, fundamental ideas should still be present.

Furthermore, be sure that their backstory makes sense. Even if you're introducing it through quick, brief flashbacks, ultimately, you want the reader to have all the pieces to solve the puzzle.

Last but not least, make your backstory feel personal to your character! Build it in a sense that if it were to go to any other character, it wouldn't have an effect that's as severe. Make it targeted to its owner. While this is something that can be difficult to execute, it really provides insight to your character, and is an easy way to add some intricacy to a simple backstory! A good place to start is thinking about the things personal to your character. For instance, this could be their past before the event, people they care about, their morals, etc. Then, add it in said event so that it pushes and/or challenges your character in a way that makes them re-evaluate that value.

There you go! Here are my personal tips on how to upgrade your character's backstory and have it really impact your reader! Be creative, keep it centered around a couple things, make it genuine, and make it targeted to the character!

Happy writing~

3hks <3

[qtboni]

╰﹒ 𝐑𝐄𝐁𝐔𝐈𝐋𝐃𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐇𝐎𝐏𝐄𝐒 !

PAIRING: Simon 'Ghost' Riley X Reader

OVERVIEW: After an argument with you, Simon feels a deep sense of remorse for the pain he caused and the distance he has created between himself and you. He proposes watching a movie together as a way to reconcile however, during the movie, Simon notices that you were zoning out. And when confronted, you burst into tears and reveal deep-seated emotions that you have been keeping to yourself.

C/W: Angst + hurt w/ comfort !! mentions of alcohol (drinking), offensive languages, mentions of overthinking for reader, both parties are hurt 'nd crying

W/C: 3.5k bubs

The silence was almost unbearable as you sat alone in the dimly lit living room, feeling increasingly claustrophobic. The weight of Simon's words hung in the air, making you feel like you couldn't catch your breath.

The room felt cold, the air thick with your tension. You tried to breathe deeply, filling your lungs with oxygen in hopes that it would calm the pounding of your heart. But it was no use.

You were trapped. Trapped in the silence, trapped in the aftermath of the argument.

You couldn't shake the feeling that this was all your fault. Maybe if you hadn't said anything, or if you had just kept your mouth shut, things wouldn't have escalated like they did.

Tears pricked the corners of your eyes, and you fought back the urge to cry again.

This wasn't how your night was supposed to go.

The pain in your heart was all too real, a heavy weight pressing down on your chest. You wanted to scream, to cry, to let go of the emotions, but you couldn't.

Instead, you lay on the couch, your body motionless except for the tears running down your face.

"Can you just stop being a bother?"

Exhaused. You felt so exhausted that you find that sleeping right now would've sufficed your hurt. Even if the tears would have left dry tear marks in the early morning when you get up.

Your thoughts raced, your mind filled with the sound of Simon's words, replaying over and over again like a broken record.

"I didn't even ask for any of these."

You couldn't stop obsessing over what he'd said, what he'd meant, whether or not he meant it. All you knew was that the hurt was too much to bear.

Until your body had enough.

After taking a moment to process what had just happened, you felt... numb. Your breaths came slowly and evenly, your eyes no longer brimming with tears, and your hiccups no longer piercing the silence of the room.

You sighed and sat up properly on the couch, rubbing your eyes as you tried to banish the images of Simon's anger from your mind.

You decided to distract yourself by focusing on the task at hand: cleaning up the living room from the party's remnants. You made your way over to the coffee table, picking up the empty plates, the two drinks for you and Simon, and the now cold popcorn.

You took a deep breath, feeling the familiar scent of butter and salt waft up from the table, and started to gather everything up.

As you worked, you couldn't help but think about what Simon was up to in the bedroom. You didn't want to know, but the silence was deafening, and you couldn't help but wonder.

'Maybe he's finally sleeping...' you sincerely thought.

After cleaning up the living room, you made your way to the kitchen, your feet dragging against the hardwood floor with each step. You opened the fridge and grabbed a light alcohol, pouring yourself a glass as you made your way to the countertop.

You sat down, swirling the liquid around in the glass, then taking a slow sip. The familiar taste of alcohol burned in your throat, sending a shiver down your spine.

You closed your eyes, feeling the headache coming on, and massaged your temples. Your mind felt tired, your body felt heavy, and all you wanted to do was slip into bed and sleep.

You took another small sip and sighed, feeling a little bit better as the alcohol began to take effect.

Suddenly, a hand gently touched your arm, making you jump. "What-" you muttered to yourself.

You turned to face Simon, who was standing behind you. He looked exhausted, with red eyes and bags under them. He couldn't look at you in your eyes after that and so he resorted to lean himself closer to you when he noticed that you eased your body to him, obviously calm with him touching you after the argument you guys had.

"I'm so sorry," he said softly, his voice barely a whisper. "I didn't mean to say those things. I was just so angry, and I didn't think about how much they would hurt you."

His voice cracked as he spoke, and you could feel the sincerity in his words. You could also feel your heart breaking all over again at the thought of the things he had said, even though it was clear that he was truly sorry.

"I know it doesn't make it right, but I just wanted to apologize," he continued, his tone softer than you've ever heard before. "I shouldn't have let my anger get the better of me like that."

Despite your hurt, you found yourself nodding. "It's alright, Si'." You replied, eyes averting away from him. With a sigh, you took a sip from your glass. "Everyone has their moments, hun."

"Can we just start over?" he asked gently, reaching out to touch your hand. "I'm sorry, I... I just want us to be happy..."

Your gaze met his, and even though it was filled with regret and remorse, you could still see the love and care in his eyes. You knew that he meant every word he said, and that he would do anything to make things right between the two of you.

"I'm..." You said softly, reaching out to take his hand in yours. "willing to try, sweetheart..."

As you sat beside Simon, taking in his words of apology, you felt a pit form in the bottom of your stomach. You had wanted to hear those words from him for so long, to know that he was truly remorseful for the pain he had caused you.

But as you looked into his eyes, you couldn't quite escape the feeling of hurt that still lingered.

"I'm willing to try, for us." You continued so softly, your voice tinged with a hint of sorrow. "I know it takes a lot to admit when you're wrong, and I appreciate you doing that."

You reached out, taking hold of his hand in yours, trying to convince yourself that everything was going to be okay. But deep down, you still felt the pain of his words, and you weren't sure if you could ever truly forgive him.

"I can't deal with this right now."

You had buried your true feelings deep inside, hiding them in the dark, just for his comfort. And in that moment, you didn't know which way was up.

Just for his comfort? What about yours?

The silence stretched between you and Simon, a small part of you wanting him to say something to make it better, to make it all go away. But he merely looked at you, his expression a mixture of hope and uncertainty.

"Thank you," he said finally, his voice filled with sincerity. "I know it won't be easy, but I'm ready to do whatever it takes to make things right between us over and over again."

You wanted to believe him, to feel the hope and love that you had once shared. You really do.

But the pain still lingered, a constant reminder of the broken promises and the tears that had come before.

You sat in silence for a few moments, processing Simon's phrases. His words sounded sincere, and you wanted to believe that he was genuinely sorry for the hurt he caused you.

But you can't shake the feeling that you may never be able to fully forgive him.

Simon reached out and took your hand in his, and you couldn't help but notice the warmth in his touch. His voice was steady, soft, with a hint of tenderness that sent shivers down your shoulders.

"Say, love?" He called out to you. "Do you want to go and have that movie night again? 2.0?"

You were caught off guard by the proposal, and your eyes widened in surprise. "I..."

You had been expecting to spend the evening alone, nursing your wounds and attempting to forget the hurt in your heart. The thought of going back to that place was excruciating, but the look on Simon's face was one of pure determination.

He wanted to make it up to you, and he was willing to do whatever it took. You hesitated before speaking, not wanting to give in to the emotions that were racing through your mind.

"Do you really want to?" You asked, turning your face away from him as tears began to form at the corners of your eyes.

You had been trying so hard to stay strong, but your heart ached with the realization that you still loved him, despite the hurt and betrayal.

'God, were you just so pathetic.' A voice in your head echoed.

"Of course, sweetheart," he replied, his tone gentle and full of affection. "I want to make it up to you. Please, let me prove it to you."

Despite your doubts and insecurities, you nodded slowly, allowing yourself to be overcome by the overwhelming love you felt for him.

"Let's do it," You said, your voice barely above a whisper.

You can't believe it, can't believe that you would really put him first than yourself. You can't believe that you considered the proposal just because Simon's words and actions spoke volumes to you.

You could see the determination in his eyes, and the way he looked at you made your heart ache. You had been so torn apart by his previous actions, the thought of him trying to make it up to you and showing he cared about you brought you even more glumness.

You watch as Simon's face broke into a wide smile, and he reached out to take your hand again, exclaiming, "Fantastic! You won't regret it, love. Let's make it the best movie night we've ever had!"

The movie became a haze, and you barely spoke a word, lost in the emotions that were running through you as you sought out comfort in the awkward room.

Save from Simon's often comments about the movie, it was just your thoughts swimming around. It was quiet. It was making you feel self-conscious.

But you wouldn't want to upset him, god, was it so wholesome trying his best to make it up to you. You couldn't afford to do something that might impact this negatively. So you stayed quiet, only answering in small replies to his comments about the movie.

Even though you were with Simon, you felt like you were alone. You were battling thoughts and feelings that would take over if you let them. But you were holding on for Simon, not wanting to break what you guys have in this moment.

You appreciated his efforts but it was hard to forget what happened. You wanted to let it go but it was still so fresh and raw.

The silence was deafening but you didn't want to break it with how you were feeling. You were still processing what happened and didn't want to burden Simon anymore than he already was. So you stayed quiet, watching the movie with Simon and trying to distract yourself from your thoughts.

So you sat silently next to Simon, watching the movie in front of you as he blabbered on and on about the movie. At this point, you don't even give a shit at watching it anymore.

You tried not to let your thoughts wander to the things that were weighing on your mind, not wanting to ruin the peaceful moment. It was so hard to keep up the façade, though.

You knew that if you let even a little of the sadness seep through, it would be so hard to keep it all contained in the face of his concern. It was so nice to have him by your side, but the thought of him seeing how much you were hurting just made everything worse.

So you stayed quiet, trying to keep your emotions in check. Then, you felt a lump forming in your throat. You were unsure of how to move forward from here.

And what will happen onwards? Like nothing had happened?

Suddenly, the silence was broken by Simon's voice. "Hey," he muttered, his eyes fixed on you now. "What's wrong?"

You swallowed hard, feeling your emotions welling up inside. "It's nothing," You dryly replied. "I just zoned out is all."

You wanted to tell him how much his words had hurt, but the words refused to come. Instead, you just sat there in silence, staring at the floor, your heart pounding in your chest.

Simon seemed to sense your discomfort, and his expression softened. "I know I have a lot of things to work on," he said, his voice barely above a whisper. "But I promise I'm going to do better. For you."

His words seemed to fall flat against your ears, almost lost in the overwhelming pain you felt. You wanted to believe him, to believe that things could get better, but a part of you was still unsure.

The silence filled the room again, thick with the weight of your emotions. You wanted to say something, to tell him how you felt, but you just couldn't. Instead, you remained there, silent, feeling the loneliness settle around you like a blanket.

Tears started to well up in your eyes as the words and emotions started to bubble up from inside you. You tried to hold back the tears, but they just kept overflowing, streaming down your face.

"Simon," you managed to say through choked sobs, the words barely intelligible. "I don't know how to say this, but I just can't keep it all inside any longer. You've hurt me so much earlier, over and over again. And I know I've probably hurt you too, but it's just that I can't seem to fix it. I feel like I've tried everything, but nothing works."

Your voice was shaking with emotion as you spoke, the words coming out like a river. You weren't sure if Simon was listening, but you kept talking anyway, the tears streaming down your face.

"I feel so hopeless," you managed to utter, the words catching in your throat. "I don't know if we can ever make this work. But I love you so much, Simon, and I want to try. I want to try so hard, because I know there's something between us that's worth fighting for. I just don't know what to do. I don't know anymore."

The silence filled the room again, the weight of your words hanging heavy in the air. You were left feeling vulnerable and exposed, with nowhere to hide.

You continued to say how you felt, the pain in your heart pouring out with every word.

You told Simon about how much his words had hurt you, how his refusal to listen to your thoughts and feelings made you feel like a burden to him. You couldn't help but wonder what you had done wrong to deserve such treatment.

As you talked, the tears fell from your eyes, each one representing the pain that you had been holding inside for so long. As you cried, you felt a weight lift off your shoulders, a weight that had been dragging you down for far too long.

"I've been trying so hard to show you how much I care," you sobbed. "I don't know why it's not enough. What else can I do to make you see me? To make you understand that I love you, and that I'll do anything to make this work?"

As you finished speaking, you fell silent, the tears still streaming down your face. The room was filled with a heavy silence, the only sound the soft sob of your breath. You felt a sense of exhaustion wash over you, as if all the emotions you had been holding back had finally been released.

The silence continued to fill the room, and for a moment it seemed as though time itself had stopped. Neither of you spoke, and it was as though the weight of your words hung in the air between you.

After what felt like an eternity, Simon reached out and took your hand. His touch was warm and comforting, and it seemed as though some part of him understood the pain that you were feeling.

"I'm sorry," he whispered, his voice barely above a whisper. "I never meant to hurt you like that. I just got caught up in my own thoughts, forgetting how important you are to me- which is a pretty damn shit move. I'm really sorry, darlin'."

You looked up at him, tears still streaming down your face. You wanted to believe him, to believe that he truly understood the pain that you were feeling. But you couldn't shake the fear that it was all just a temporary moment of kindness, and that soon enough he would go back to treating you the way he had before.

You didn't want to get hurt again, but you couldn't help but hope that this time might be different.

Maybe this time, he truly did understand...

Simon reached out and gently wiped away your tears, his touch providing a small measure of comfort.

You watch as tears pooled into his eyes too, but he still continued, "You're not a burden, my love, and you never have been. Fuck, I'm so sorry. I'm the fucking asshole here. I want to show you that.. that I can make things right."

Simon's voice was hoarse with emotion as he spoke, his words barely above a whisper. He couldn't believe what he'd done to you, how he'd hurt the person he loved the most. He hated himself for the pain he'd caused, and he cursed himself out for not being able to do better.

As you watched, tears pooled into his eyes as well, his emotions rising to the surface. But despite the pain he was feeling, he was determined to make things right. His love for you was stronger than any mistake he could make.

"I'm so sorry," he said, his voice shaking with emotion. "You deserve so much more than what I've given you. I want to make things right, to show you that I love you, more than anything else."

His words seemed to echo in the room, filling the space between you with all the love and guilt that Simon was feeling in that moment. You watched as he wiped away his own tears, his determination burning bright in his eyes.

For a moment, there was silence, as you both stared at each other, overwhelmed with the weight of everything that had been said and done. But then, slowly, you reached out and took his hand in yours, and you knew that despite everything, you were both willing to fight for your love, to make things work.

You felt a small spark of hope. Maybe, just maybe, he truly did mean it this time. Maybe, despite the hurt and disappointment of the past, there was a chance for something better.

"I believe you," you said softly. "But I need you to show me. I need you to put in the effort... to try."

As you finished speaking, Simon could only watch as tears continued to stream down your face. The guilt and remorse weighing heavily on his shoulders was almost too much to bear.

How could he have let you down like this, after all you had done for him? After everything you guys had been through together?

He wanted nothing more than to turn back the clock and make everything right, to show you that you meant more to him than anything else in the world. But he knew that it would take more than just words to convince you that he was telling the truth.

Simon would have to show you with his actions, prove to you that he truly was committed to making this relationship work.

"I promise," He said through gritted teeth, his voice barely above a whisper. "I promise to do whatever it takes to make this work, to show you that I love you no matter what. I'm sorry, my love, sorry for all the pain I've caused you. Fuckin' hell... I'm going to make things right, I promise you."

As he spoke, his resolve only grew stronger, his determination stronger than ever.

"Don't cry anymore, pretty girl."

He might not deserve your forgiveness, but he was going to do damn everything to earn it. Even if it meant fighting tooth and nail, even if meant facing his greatest fears and demons.

Because in the end, you were all that mattered to him. And Simon would do whatever it took to mend this relationship.

For the first time in what felt like forever, you felt the weight of the world lift off your shoulders.

A/N: now that we've made up, i can now sleep peacefully 🙏🙏 i hope you’ve all been enjoying the second part of this. i have to say though,, your support and enthusiasm has been overwhelming, and it means the world to me to know that you’re all enjoying my work <//3 this has been the heaviest fic ive ever written holy shit. listening to nbhd songs to this, esp this playlist, is such a vibe !! i couldnt stop rereading all this and crying my ass off on repeat 😘😘

special mentions <//3 . @mockerycrow @pandoramyst @monanight @casualunknownrunaway @invaderzim13 @xsoftdead18 @colorfulbanditempathhero-blog @aliilium @rhyanna6012 @ghostlythots @duskwo0d @b1rds3ye [ thank you guys for loving this lil silly fic of mine and for the supports, really, i am like so over the moon that y'all liked it ! thank you so much for your patience and support while waiting for the p2. i'm so grateful that you've been willing to stick with it, and i really appreciate all the comments you've given me along the way. i rlly hope this brings you all the comfort you guys were looking <3 ]

[howtofightwrite]

Are horned helmets actually a thing? How would a fantasy race that has horns... compesate for them?

Only in the sense that people do make them for various reasons. There are ceremonial and ornamental horned helmets dating back into the bronze age. There's a famous example that was gifted to Henry the VIII in the 1500s.

As I said, some were made for religious ceremonies. Usually for priests of horned deities (there's a bunch of these.) In these cases it could be made from either metal or actual animal horns. I'm not familiar with much beyond that in these cases because archaeology and anthropology are a little outside my area of expertise. I'm not aware of any religions that still use horned helmets, but it really wouldn't surprise me if it pops up from time to time. I'd also categorize head gear with attached antlers in the same range here. It wouldn't surprise me if it exists, or existed, but, I'm not aware of any examples.

We have depictions of horned helmets from knights at tourney in the 14th century. (And at least one surviving example.) This is probably legitimate. At least, in so far as that the knights may have worn horned helmets to show off. Though, this head gear wasn't something that a knight would wear onto the battlefield.

The modern image of the horned helmet (and the association with Vikings) has a lot more to do with Wagner's The Ring Cycle, and particularly stage performances of that opera. (It's not technically original to that, but the horned Viking was a 19th century German invention.) This also the source for a lot of novelty hats and helmets that you can readily obtain today.

The problem with horned helmets on the battlefield is that it gives your opponent something to grab in a tight melee. And letting someone get control of your head in a fight is a very bad thing. This is made worse with a helmet, where the foe could easily unseat the headgear, potentially blinding the wearer long enough to kill them.

There are historical examples of horned helmets intended for use on the battlefield. The Japanese are probably the easiest example to reference. However, in these cases, the horned helmets were worn, specifically, by officers, and communicated their authority to their soldiers, so they could more effectively issue orders. Somewhat obviously, that's not someone you're going to see in the meat grinder of the front lines. (Also, in most cases, these horns were oriented vertically, and were probably too small to grip. The surviving knight's helm, mentioned above, also featured vertically mounted horns.)

Similarly, if you had examples of horned cavalry helms (particularly vertically mounted horns) used by late medieval or even early modern cavalry, that wouldn't surprise me. Especially if that was part of their parade dress. While it's not horns, the winged hussars come to mind as another example of absurd ornamentation on cavalry, and they continued operating until the late 18th century.

Now, as for a fantasy race, I could see grabbing their horns being a very, very, bad idea. This is somewhat informed by the fact that the first example that comes to mind is the minotaur, where grabbing their horns is probably a pretty good way to ensure you're going to get a horn run through your chest. Ultimately though, it becomes a bit like grabbing someone's hair. You've just committed a limb to limiting their head's range of motion, while leaving both of their arms unfettered. On the battlefield, that sounds like a great way to get stabbed in the armpit and die.

So, they are real in the sense that they existed (and still exist), but their actual use in warfare was extremely limited due to practical considerations. That said, people have thought they looked cool for thousands of years, and they're around. Though the Viking helmet is a complete fabrication by 19th century Germans trying to make the Vikings look cooler.

-Starke

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[bananasfosterparent]

The difference in AA is his soul being irreversibly gone. That is the point and this is what Larians writers have been hinting at and this is what irks people about AA. The oversexualisation and erasure of his trauma, effectively erasing him as a person. I know we're talking about a fictional character, but if we're gonna go off on the topic, saying something "doesn't matter" is just a cop-out. Astarion didn't need to be "fixed" to the point of emotional lobotomy.

I don't think it's wrong to like or prefer him, but I think it's valid to have opinion on the matter, much like you have yours.

I started to apologize for the length of this, but honestly, since you sent the message, I'm going to respond to every part of it. I'm not sorry for the rambling lol

"The difference in AA is his soul being irreversibly gone."

Okay, show me the quote/scene/dialog in-game where this canonly is said and confirmed? Where does it say the ritual will ever touch his soul or any part of the game talks about his literal soul?

And if by soul you mean the "lose who you are inside" as a metaphor, that's still a matter of opinion and not actually canonly what happens. Astarion is still himself. The "changes" in his personality are shifts to simply adjust to the company he is around. He's essentially code switching.

That is the point and this is what Larians writers have been hinting at and this is what irks people about AA.

Got it. So the point of Astarion's romance is for Larian to write a singular story that has one ending you're "supposed" to enjoy with a "morally good" conclusion, and one ending that's fun and sexy, but "supposed" to be a cautionary warning of how things "shouldn't go". Because that makes sense for a "choose your own adventure" game and that's why the romance stops with AA as soon as you ascend him, and he enslaves and compels your character and you can't continue the romance with him--OH WAIT.

The oversexualisation and erasure of his trauma, effectively erasing him as a person

"The oversexualization".... So you know my Tav's personal motivations and why she chose to ascend him? And you're confident you know I made the roleplay decisions I made because you know it centers entirely and solely around it being to sexualize him?

Interesting.

Because that couldn't be further from the truth. My Tav has an entire story for why she chose to ascend him and it has nothing to do with how sexy it makes him. And it was a story I came up with well before I knew about any of this "sexualization" concept. And as a player, I didn't ascend him because I wanted a sexy vampire. I went into his romance blind and had no idea what would happen when I did it. I ascended him because it narratively made sense for my character and their relationship. But even then, if I wanted a sexy vampire, why is that a bad thing? He's not real.

And I find it so ironic that a lot of spawn fans who are anti-AA only enjoy AA for the sexual parts of that ending. Yet, we're the ones "oversexualizing" him lol

As for "erasure of his trauma"... where do I even start? What does that even mean? lol I'm not gonna lie. You sound young or unaware, but believe it or not, in real life there is more than one way to deal with trauma. And dealing with it in a way you don't agree with doesn't erase the trauma or mean the person is pretending it never happened. Ascended Astarion very much addresses his trauma and exercises a different form of healing.

In a fantasy world, you can actually explore those other options and have the outcome work FOR you, even if it wouldn't in real life. Accepting your fate and trying to align yourself with "morally good" choices is certainly not a bad thing and one way to go. In real life, that's what I agree with, as a Christian and believer in Christ. But Faerun doesn't have a Jesus. They don't have the same real world ideas of morals. They have their own gods, their own history, their own moral perspective outside of our world. Bringing in (your perspective of) our real world morals is a valid way to roleplay, but it's not the "only correct" way to roleplay.

There is the route of overthrowing what was meant to control and destroy you, and taking control of it yourself. Taking what was meant to be against you and making it work for you instead. For me, that's what Astarion's ascension means.

A smaller example of this is if you give Astarion Gandrel's crossbrow to use.

This weapon was designed to work against vampire spawn. It allows for its user to possibly inflict Turn Undead on enemies and gives them advantage in a fight against monster types. And yet, Astarion can wield it and use it effectively. He can take what was created to hurt and destroy him and use it to work for him.

Ascension can be the exact same thing. It's not a matter of which opinion of ascension is morally right. It's a matter of which decision on ascension is right for your Tav and their story with Astarion.

...saying something "doesn't matter" is just a cop-out.

Can you show me where I said "something" "doesn't matter"? Cause it wasn't in any of my recent posts. Are you referring to one of my older ones?

Not only do I not know what part of what post you're referring to, BUT I also don't know what I was talking about, if I even said "something" doesn't matter. I don't know what that "something" is.

Astarion didn't need to be "fixed" to the point of emotional lobotomy.

I'm glad we agree on something. I've seen people claim ascension is "fixing" him (because it eliminates the negative traits of vampirism) and therefore it's weird to call anti-AA spawn fans "fixers". But the difference is trying to change(fix) his morals and view of the world to reflect a "good" worldview (the spawn ending) VS trying to change (fix) his circumstances and lack of control (helping his ascend).

AA fans do not want to change his personality or his mental/emotional state. We want to change his circumstances so that he has a place to be able to make those decisions on his own. And for most of us, Ascension provides that perspective.

Spawn fans want the same thing. But the approach is more to convince him from the inside out that he can make those decisions without ascension. And that's also true. But not more valid or the only way.

But his personality does not change in either ending. In one (spawn ending), he is able to find freedom in just being free of Cazedor and exist the way he always has with a newfound confidence and peace.

In another, he is able to find freedom in taking the helm himself, and holding all the cards to be the one on top. He finds confidence in having the power and being able to wield it, without fear of anything he's had to fear with the negatives of vampirism.

But in both, he is still the same person. He still gets joy out of the same things (killing people, having/causing/observing bloodshed, and causing some chaos), he still has the same personality. The difference is in his circumstances and how he presents himself.

I don't think it's wrong to like or prefer him, but I think it's valid to have opinion on the matter, much like you have yours.

You don't mean that. Because if you did, you wouldn't have a reason to send this anon message in the first place. You wouldn't care enough. It wouldn't matter. You wouldn't have this opinion. You would be able to see value in both endings and respect the positive perspective of ascension even if you don't understand it, without arguing headcanon points like "his soul is irreversibly gone".

Your entire message is literally you trying to tell me it's wrong to like him and that the opinion I have of him is invalid and wrong. I already respect your opinion on both sides of him. Because it's your right to how you roleplay and see him. If you respect mine, you're doing a really awful job at showing it.

Regardless, if that is your intention or not. That's what sending this message says. If you really want to say you respect AA fans for enjoying AA, then stop sending AA fans messages like this and either completely avoid AA and the fans or refrain from trying to argue against it. We can discuss it and not agree while also respecting each other's roleplay choices.

This is not a wrong vs right conversation. It's a "what's your preference?" conversation. Spawn vs Ascended should be like "what's your favorite Pokemon type?"

The sooner that is realized, the better off this fandom will be.

[yan-lorkai]

"Oh honey, I know, I know." Your soft best friend's voice sounded over your ears like some kind of balm, Vil held your weeping figure close to his chest, tracing the strands of your hair as he tried his best to soothe you.

The tears drying in your eyes were a painful reminder of how you found out your little crush was spreading horrible rumors about you as well as calling you names. And you normally wouldn't care but it didn't make sense. In all of your interactions, he'd been so sweet and caring.

If it was anyone else who told you this unfortunate news, maybe you wouldn't have believed it. But Vil and Rook wouldn't lie to you, they had no reason to and so, you let yourself fall apart.

Because you was one step away from declaring yourself to that colleague. Just as you were one step away from declaring to several other people that you had liked in the past. And maybe fate hates you because all the guys you liked were assholes. All of them without exception did something that broke your heart and destroyed your confidence. And all of them without exception always fell to their knees and begged your forgiveness, said that they did nothing wrong and that someone had set them up.

What a ridiculous excuse, you thought.

"I'll never let another boy hurt you ever again." Vil spoke after a long time in silence, lilac eyes stared at your sad form still lying on his chest and you didn't feel the slightest desire to get up at any time in the future. If only he wasn't so strict, you'd already be eating your second pot of ice cream and listening to sad songs. "No one else will hurt you, I promise."

Half sniffling, half laughing, you looked at him like he was the most precious thing you'd ever seen. His friendship and his ever so sure words always gave you a sense of security, and until you found a way to go home you hoped he would stay by your side.

"But what if they try anyway?" Your voice was weak, fearful. You almost didn't want to fall in love with anyone else if it meant someone could cheat on you, lie to you, or, like this time, spread rumors about you.

"If they try anything I'll be there." Another voice sounded in the room almost making you jump. And the door opened, revealing Rook who was carrying an incredibly red pie. The scent of strawberries wafting through the air. His green eyes took you in slowly, memorizing every little thing. "Mon ange, as long as we're by your side, there's no reason to be afraid of anything or anyone. But let's think about something else now, oui?"

Vil eyed the pie suspiciously. He looked about to protest when you looked at him with your best puppy dog eyes, begging him to just let you have a bite of the delicious dessert Rook had probably spent some time trying to bake.

The model let out a sigh but was quick to remove the plate from the hunter's hands while the other, silly and cheerful, helped you to sit down and dropped a kiss on your forehead. The little things they did warm your heart and make you forget about it almost effectively.

"Say ah, Mon Ange." Rook encouraged, massaging your shoulders and kissing your neck softly.

And you rolled your eyes. "Ah!"

Vil spooned the pie over to you, watching as you happily ate it. The image was enough to make his heart ache with so much pent up affection, the model looked at his astute companion and they both found they felt the same way about you. Affection. Love. A will to protect you. You were just a little bunny who hopped up to its predators and decided it wanted to be close to them.

So like a little bunny you were captured.

"Vil…Rok…" Your words all blended together as black dots danced over your eyes. Everything around you was so light, so cold and the last thing you saw was the expression on your friends' faces as you passed out.

You don't know but one day, you'll thank them for protecting you from the asshole guys you thought you fell in love with. Oh, if only you knew what they were saying, what they were doing, your friends couldn't sit back and watch it happen. They had to act and get rid of them, an accident is always convenient and afterwards they could always smother you with their love, the love you seemed to need.

"Let's get them to a safe place." Hummed Rook looking excited. And Vil agreed.

[murfpersonalblog]

IWTV S2 Ep7 Musings - Loustat: The Trial (Spoilers)

Imma split my Loustat musings into 3 parts, cuz there's A LOT to unpack. So I'll do the Ep3/4 & Ep5 revisits in the next posts; this is just general/initial Louis & Lestat stuff I wanted to respond to.

They beat the dog snot outta Louis, omg. They nearly snapped his neck! Louis was barely conscious, ofc his memory's spotty.

I LOVE how they're emphasizing the physicality of the Maker-Fledgling bond, first w/ Lou & Madz, now w/ Les. It's ofc all wrapped up in how much Loustat loves e/o, but its also their blood connection thru Amel. (I wonder how Louis Merrick'ing himself in Ep5 affects his connection to Amel if his heart didn't stop, cuz Armand stopped him from burning too much?)

And I love what Jacob said in the Insider, afterwards.

Fear that Lestat's come to exact revenge; excitement (a frisson of both negative & positive emotions, excited to see Les just cuz of the tension of having not seen him in so long, but also having all his nerves & senses tingling cuz of the tense anticipation & not knowing what to expect--hence: fear); fury cuz this whole mess could've been avoided if Les had told them WHY European vampires should be avoided at all costs; and relief cuz Les's' alive, his husband's ok.

But this time Lou KNOWS he's the real deal, cuz he can FEEL it--"it wasn't NOT his hand." And Dream!Stat jumpscare in Dubai, well well well; I thought Lou'd stopped seeing him on that Parisian bench? 👀

Here we effing go, whatever this French bish has to say better be good 🍿🍿🍿

I HATE HIM YOUR HONOR 🤣 Omfg take ONE thing seriously! Not the Roland-Garros, STFU! XD Lestat going off script got the coven like WTF?!

OML 🍿🍿🍿

Well that's not helpful at all--WHICH ONE!?

Les was asleep for the whole 100 years b4 he went to NOLA--but we KNOW this can't be true, cuz Les met Marius after he left Paris❗ SAM (the vamp) has been mouthing the words to this whole script, so I wonder if that's just what Les was TOLD to say, OR! It's what HE told THE COVEN, so they wouldn't know about TWMBK❗❗

NOT LES DOING A PIROUETTE INTO THE EARTH STAHP OMG 😭

THIS GAY QUEEN CAN'T HELP HIMSELF, I CANNOT

Awoke in 1908 & disembarked in humidified daughter of Paris, NOLA--but Les told Lou he was headed for Saint Louis, Missouri. 👀

"And who did you meet there?" DANG this is TENSE--Loustat finally making eye contact for the first time, Les having to see his husband all beat up & sad; as Claudia languishes in the background, as usual.

Not Louis with the cigar 😭

"The ACCUSED," LOL, Santiago had to catch himself--stay dehumanizing the violent evil Black man whydontcha; we see you. And Lestat had to feed him his own lines after derailing everyone with that homophobic soldier's evisceration.

Omg this sounds like every court case b4 they throw the book at a Black man. And the bored unaffected way the white audience just rolls their eyes & shakes their heads & smokes--they DGAF about Lou; they've already decided he ain't ish--A STONING.

LOUIS FACE. This is EXACTLY how folk in the fandom talk about Lou--and it came back with a vengeance during all that Loumand Maitre/Arun crap, as y'all were QUICK to jump on Lou being an evil pimp, even though your fave Daniel literally said that was just kinky roleplay Armand didn't take seriously when ish got REAL.

I thought y'all were just bartering for the "last bouquet of lilies"!?

Oh great, the coven's making Louis look like a perv predator. 🤦‍♀️ And the visual centering of Lou's dastardly mind-control waves like a halo over sweet innocent victim Lestat's blonde head, I CANNOT.

Omfg Louis face, SAME! If this crocodile-crying liar don't take his To Kill A Mockingbird, Central Park Five lookin arse off that stage! 🤬

Omfg Lestat I'm finna kill you myself. Omg this nonsense is too much; I know Lou, speak up, YES! But also, STFU, Les is actually tryna save your life by tearing your reputation to shreds. 😬🤦‍♀️

I loooove this effect when the coven uses the Mind Gift on them. They effed him up so bad his left eye started hemorrhaging. 😭

Armand don't you look away for an INSTANT, don't you even BLINK! You could've prevented this, EFF ALL Y'ALL in this nasty AF Theatre!

This gaslighting is hitting way too close to the way IRL court cases go when the innocent get the book thrown at them for crimes they didn't commit.

This is so painful to watch, but Sam Reid you better werk; the way he was yelling those lines had me shook, oml.

Les knows he's effed up, but what can he do? His eyes are going red; he's gonna cry. (His contacts look different, I thought they said they were gonna stick with purple eyed Les?) "I offered it to him in the church on the altar: My companionship." And Lou nodding along, cuz that was their wedding! 😭💔

I was wondering how these frames would be used. It's about the Ep3 race riots and vampire loneliness, the night Louis left & Claudia was made. But I love the implications, cuz how could humans know ANYTHING about hows vampires feel--which is SO important when they start lying about everything else that went down with how Claudia was made and how it would affect her as a "defective" vamp.

Even the VAMPIRES don't know how other vampires feel, and the capacity they have for enduring--Armand said it over & over to Louis in Ep3 and Madeleine in Ep6. Lestat came closest in S1 when he commented on Claudia's eternally 14-yr old metabolism & needing to eat more than an normal vamp, but beyond that none of them had a effing clue what Claudia was going through. They don't know REAL loneliness, even with her diaries telling them what she thought, not HOW SHE FELT.

(And I'm reminded of what I said here about Gabrielle telling Lestat what her loneliness felt like. I think "vampire loneliness" is different for every vampire; which is precisely why Gab (and Claudia) was able to walk away from her Maker/son & live alone; while Nicky & Louis went crazy.)

Lestat crying blood tears, daaaaang 😥

Kill this dude (but I stan a Loustat ally, LOLOL).

Imma stop here, cuz I've run out of Tumblr's stupid 30-pics per post, and the Ep3/4 revisit that "took all the pieces of Louis life, defiled them, bent them into a Lestat-shaped effigy" is IMO the JUICIEST part, with the most new meat to chew on.

[chronicbeans]

What do you think puppeteer wally would do if puppet y/n suddenly turned human?

Oh boy, he's going to go crazy. Let's go!

Puppeteer Wally if Puppet Reader turned Human:

TW: Obsessive and Possessive Behavior, Controlling Behavior, Delusions/Overly High Expectations, Perfectionism, Overprotective Behavior

He's over the moon with excitement! His (Y/N)? Human?! Now they can really be together, as in, he can take you outside and show you off! As a puppet, he couldn't really take you outside. If he did, you would have to act limp and lifeless. After all, what would the average person think of a puppet that moves and talks on its own? They'd probably scream "Haunted puppet! Creepy doll! Monstrous creature!" It just never felt right to take you out on a "date" at the mall or a restaurant, only for you to not be able to do anything.

Now that you are human, however, he can take you on those dates! It'll be just like his fantasies! Candlelit dinners, shopping sprees (he'll be sure to carry all the bags, no matter how many or how heavy they are), walks under the moonlight... Yes, exactly like his fantasies!

If you happen to look any different than your puppet form, such as (S/C) skin instead of say... the (F/C) felt that made up your puppet form's skin tone, he wouldn't mind. In fact, he finds it even more adorable than before! Your appearance in this human form, he tells himself, is simply the true you! The true culmination of every value you embody. The kindness, acceptance, patience, generosity... This human form is the true form of you, since you are those things... It may sound confusing when said aloud or written down, but to Wally, his complex thought process behind this belief makes complete sense. If anybody doesn't understand it, they simply don't have the open mind to do so. If you don't understand it, it's because you shouldn't worry your pretty little head over it.

He's been wanting to take you out somewhere for a long time, now. He hated seeing you so sad and upset in his home, looking outside with such longing. He's also terrified of the fact that, once he does take you outside, there is a chance you will run away. So, it'll take a while before he finally decides to bring you somewhere, mainly because he makes sure to plan everything ahead of time. There will be no escaping from him during this little outing. He's planned for every situation he can think of.

Another side effect of him longing to take you out is that he wants it to be perfect. It must be exactly like his imagination - with a few exceptions, of course. He may make sure that the entirety of a candlelit dinner goes exactly like his fantasies, but if you don't want to have the romantic kiss at the end, like he always imagined you would, he won't make you. He may be a bit... Unhealthy to be in this "relationship" with, but he has strong boundaries regarding physical affection. Forcing hugs and cuddles is completely fine, and he does it rather often. Anything beyond that, though? He would never dream of it! He won't even kiss you on the cheek if you say you don't want him to.

Cuddling with you as a human, is 20× better than you as a puppet, in his opinion. While puppet you may be soft and plush, human you is equally as soft, trading plushness for warmth! He also gets to listen to your relaxing heartbeat. It really grounds him whenever he gets overstimulated from work, anxiety, or even his own emotions for you. Sometimes his head and heart are filled with so many thoughts and emotions about how much he loves you, he can't put them into words, causing him to get overstimulated- which then results in an instant cuddle session that lasts two hours. Beats when you were a puppet, where he would sometimes forget that you are sentient and shake you like a plush toy, which he did before you came to life.

Speaking of puppet you... he would still want to control you, in some ways. One of his best (read: unhealthy but it worked miracles for him) coping mechanisms for fears that you would leave him would be puppeteering you to tell him exactly what he wants to hear. If he thought that you hated him and wanted to leave, he'd simply have you say "Oh, I love you, Wally! Why would I even think of leaving?" He can't exactly do that, now that you are human... So, he has gone to try to control as much as he still can.

What you eat, what you are allowed to do, what you watch... As much as he can. Much like his boundaries on affection, however, he has some strong ones here. Anything he views as being creative and expressive will always be allowed!

Cooking is creative. You can cook whatever you want, as long as he watches to make sure you don't hurt yourself. He already controls what's in the fridge and cabinets, anyway, so he is still controlling what is being eaten. He'll even eat whatever you make, complimenting it and giving you advice on how to improve.

Drawing, painting, and writing are creative. That's happily allowed, as long as he can see the drawings and paintings you make. He's... tried to read what you write, but has realized how defensive people can get over it. Especially if you decide to write a diary or journal. He'd rather not have you crying and screaming at him, again, so he'll let you show him when you are ready.

Finally, fashion is considered creative. He won't control what you wear. The only exception is when he wants to play dress up. He'll go out and buy a bunch of clothing for you, then have you try them on. Even then, though, he tries to buy things that he thinks you will like, based on things you've liked previously, things you've looked at in the store or online, and what you wore in the show. He also sees playing dress up not as forcing you to wear different clothes or to change your creative expression, but as providing more options and opportunities to expand your style and expression. He also hopes it helps you adjust to the human world, as you and Julie played dress up a lot in the shows and books.

Overall, he will become a bit more lenient in certain ways, but it is cancelled out by how he becomes more strict in others. As a puppet, you didn't eat or drink, so he didn't have to worry about that. Now, he does need to worry, so he tries to control it. However, he is now letting you go outside with him, and even buys you whatever you want as long as he doesn't see it as something that can help you escape. He doesn't worry as much about you hurting yourself around the house, due to you now being a human. As a puppet, not only could you get ripped, you simply getting wet could cause damage, as well as the possibility of you getting stained. As a human, you are safe from that, but he will now be constantly fussing over the possibility of you getting sick.

You being human will simply cause his controlling, possessive, and overprotective behaviors to switch and evolve to work for a human instead of a puppet. Wanting things to go as he fantasizes about still happened when you were a puppet, but they only involved activities around the house. He's just... adapted to the situation.

[justanothersanjilover]

One Piece Modern Gym Au wip (Part 5)

They actually stared at each other for almost half an hour before something came to Sanji’s mind.

“Can I ask you a question?”

“I don't know, can you?”

Sanji felt the burning ache to roll his eyes, but that would mean losing the game, so he didn't. Instead, he narrowed his eyes to give Zoro an annoying look.

“There were two girls at the bar earlier…”

“I assure you I don't have their number, and even if I won't give it to you.” Zoro cuts in immediately.

“For fucks sake, can you not jump to that conclusion right away?!” Sanji sighed. “They talked about a girl who used to come here some years ago and then stopped only to come back now.”

This time, Zoro narrowed his eye, but Sanji didn't put much of a thought into it.

“Yeah?”

“So…I never saw a new girl come in these past days, and I wondered who it was.”

“Don't know; ask them if you want to know. I wasn't here for the past three years, too.” Zoro shrugged his shoulders but never looked away.

Sanji licked his lips while thinking about what else the girls had said.

“Oh, one of them talked about that this girl had her breasts removed - chopped off was what she said, but I don't think that's appropriate to say. You never know why she did that, could be a medical condition…Also, it sounded like she wanted to look more buff. At least that what they said and that she should have get steroids instead, because the effect is the same, and…”

Sanji stopped talking as he realized the shift in Zoro’s gaze. Next thing was Zoro turning on his heals and walked out the front door without a word, leaving behind a very confused Sanji. Did he say something wrong? Did Zoro know the girl? What had just happened?

The next day came and went without Zoro showing up…a strange fact considering he practically lived in the Gym after his return - he was the first to come in and the last to go. But no one thought about it too much. After the following day went by without a sign of him, Sanji felt worry nagging its way into his mind. Nami seemed unbothered, and so he ignored it.

After the fifth day without Zoro showing his mosshead in the gym, Sanji had to ask Nami if she knew something about him. Was it normal for Zoro to show up every day for five to six hours, training, casually hanging out, and making his work life some kind of a mix of heaven and hell - and then disappearing from one day to the other? Or maybe it had something to do with the question about that girl…

“Maybe it's my fault…” Sanji said, looking down at his feet.

“How should this be your fault?” Nami wanted to know.

“Remember the evening you and Vivi left us behind because we had this little staring fight?”

Nami nodded, now looking up from her paperwork.

“I asked him about a girl I heard someone talk about.”

And funny enough, Nami had the same reaction as Zoro as she heard that.

“What girl?”

Sanji described the whole conversation he overheard and that he just wanted to know if Zoro knew that girl. Also, he was sure now that he knew her and maybe wanted to avoid her because of reasons he couldn't think of.

“Now it all makes sense,” Nami mumbled and shook her head.

She let Sanji describe both girls and said if he saw them, he should send them to her because she needed to tell them something.

“And what about Zoro?” Sanji asked quietly - to be honest, he was worried to the point he thought about him every day.

“He surely just crashed at Luffy’s house. If you want, I can give you his address, and you can check?”

“Would that be okay? I mean, I’m a stranger. Wouldn't your friend be upset if you handed out his address?”

Nami laughed while scribbling something down on a piece of paper.

“Na, he doesn't mind, believe me. Actually, I think he’ll be quite happy to have a new victim for his rambling. He collects people like others collect post stamps,” she paused and grinned as she saw Sanji’s somehow irritated and scared face. “That sounded creepy…It’s totally not, believe me. He just likes to make friends.”

And so Sanji left after his shift to check out if Zoro was at that Luffy’s place or not.

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First part

[lemon-dokuro]

Yesterday, I watched Sound Holic's 2007 Touhou fan film, Touhou Project Side Story ~ Memory of Stars.

The plot is about Kaguya's father, the Moon's ruler, coming to take her and Eirin back. Makes heavy use of sci-fi aesthetics and is mostly set in space. Naturally, because it was released before Bogetsusho/Silent Sinner in Blue, all it had to go off of for the state of the Moon civilization and Kaguya's relationship to it were the 8th Touhou game and maybe Reisen's route/interactions in the 9th. It's a little interesting to see the creators' interpretation because of that, but... It was recieved very poorly by the japanese Touhou fandom in 2007 when it came out, you can even find comparisons to the infamous Cookie series. The reception is understandable — it really isn't good. I actually wouldn't call the story or the premise bad, they're just kitschy in a way characteristic of the otaku culture of its time, but they are ruined completely by the wonky presentation and especially the incomprehensible pacing. I don't want to recap it here because the anime isn't even that long or hard to find, but if I did, I'd have a fair bit of trouble. It feels like one of those 90s OVAs that tries to cram 4-6 volumes of a manga in about 40 minutes, so most things happen too fast to have an impact. There's a whole character that makes absolutely no sense because she has too little screen time and too little actually explained about her (Sphere Sieben, the redheaded space commander lady). Sakuya is there for a barely explained reason. Mokou comes out of nowhere in the middle (well, at least that had a point, ridiculous as it was). And considering this, bizzarely, the movie also has a lot of pointlessly drawn-out scenes where not much happens, like they were trying to pad out the runtime, even though there's a lot of substance they could have added. I have no idea what kind of constrains they were working with, but it's not like they couldn't have just written it more tightly. If not better, then, you know, at least. Even though I don't think the general premise and the story are bad per se, they are very unfitting for Touhou. The creators are obviously going for space opera aesthetics, which is a really weird fit for Touhou. They don't even really try to make it fit. Egregiously, Kaguya's presumably biological father, Luna Marius, has a sci-fi-ish western-style name for absolutely unexplained reasons. Of course, that kind of naming difference is not implausible at all, but it's a really weird creative choice, especially considering it's never adressed, not even in a throwaway line or anything. One could say it's emblematic of the work not compromising the conflicting aesthetics in any way. The visuals are often criticized for obvious reasons. They are great to me because I'm an oldschool doujin fetishist, but it's clearly all very stiff, mildly inconsistent, generally amareurish and feverishly oversaturated with bright flashing effects half the time. The backgrounds mostly consist of said effects. A lot of the animations are obviously reused. That being said, the original character designs are pretty well done. The bunny girl looks especially good, the artist absolutely nailed the early windows Touhou design style. Also, naturally, because Sound Holic is mainly a music circle, the soundtrack is decent. It's not remarkable, but there's nothing wrong with it, it's standard for 2007 Touhou arrange tracks. There's not much to say about the voice acting either — standard for doujin anime. The voice actors are inexplicably pretty well-known, but it's not that uncommon to see big names on the most random 2000s doujin projects. That's probably how these people become popular in the first place.

Well, what can I say overall. It's a weird little movie. I can't recommend it, but maybe you'll get a laugh out of it, or maybe you'll like the visuals as much as I did.

Also, that rabbit's names are both mochi types...

[bambiraptorx]

Not Quite Hidden AU: Part 10. Word Count: 692. Readers chose: Ask if he has questions.

Mildly infuriating as it might be that the child apparently thinks Draxum is weird, he’s got some rather more pressing concerns at the moment.  He crosses his arms behind his back.  “Surely you had your own questions to ask.  You must be observant if you knew that I recognized you.  Are you not curious?”

The boy looks around the study for a long moment.  “You have lots of books, Donnie would like that.”

A non sequitur.  Perhaps the child is hiding his motives for coming.  Is it possible his father sent him?  But that ferret obviously harbors a strong dislike towards Draxum, and no logical parent would send their child alone to gather information from someone they held a grudge against.  That said, the man had seemed rather… emotional, to say the least.  Most people avoided raising their fur like that, especially in public.  It was just as rude and aggressive as yelling, for some species even more so.  Someone who reacted with such volatility in a grocery store of all places seemed rather unlikely to behave rationally at other times.

Draxum rubs his chin thoughtfully as Huginn settles onto his shoulder.  “And which one of your siblings is Donnie?”  Perhaps he can use this opportunity to gather more information on the lives of his turtles.

The child tilts his head.  “Are those green crystal lights?”

“Ah—yes.”  What does that have to do with anything?

“Why green?  Blue's a way better color.”

“What, do you want the lights blue?  I can change them.”  It's simple to reach out towards the crystals and adjust their mystic output, and while it feels rather odd to have his study bathed in blue light instead of green, something about the grin on the child’s face is rather nice to witness.

“Woah!  I didn't thought you were so good with magic!”  The boy looks around appreciatively, scanning the color differences cast over the room.  He drums his fingers on the desk, pausing as his hand brushes against a few of the papers still resting there.  Just some notes Draxum had been writing down after today’s encounter, so why would they draw his attention?  

Draxum watches with a mild sense of amusement as the boy twists his head, frowning and mouthing the words as he reads off the sheet.  “My writing seems to have drawn your interest, child.”

The boy hums.  “You spelled Dad’s name wrong.  The P goes before the L.”

Draxum snatches the paper away.  “What are you talking about, I wouldn't have—” Oh, it looks like he did write Slpinter.  Oops.

“An’ you didn't get Donnie’s or Mikey's right, either.  They're really way longer.” The child then has the audacity to grin up at him, kicking his heels against the desk.  “Didja forget their names already?”

Draxum is not going to entertain this conversational thread any longer.  He leans around the turtle and slaps his notes down on the far end of his desk.  “My notes are personal effects and I'd prefer you not go through them any longer.”

The turtle reaches for the paper, and Draxum drags it out of his reach.  That isn't enough to deter him from making another grab, and another as Draxum once more pulls away the sheet.  The boy grunts something under his breath.  

“Speak up, brat,” Draxum snaps, and if it sounds a little more like an order than a request, at least it works.

The child huffs, looks him in the eye, and says with all the derision such a small face can muster: “You're annoying.”

“Excuse me?!”

The turtle reaches for the paper again, this time managing to latch onto it.  “You're annoying, and weird, and creepy, and I wanna go home!”

“You—what, you come here just to disrespect me?  Is that what you wanted?”  A growl builds in the back of Draxum's throat, barely restrained.  “You little—”

A small tap at his shoulder, barely noticeable. Just claws drumming against his armor.

“Boss, look, the kid’s not gonna cooperate much longer,” Huginn says.  “I'll just take him back now, hopefully his dad won't even know he was gone.”

Draxum bites back a sharp retort.  Inhales.  Exhales.

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[rosethreeart]

im gonna be honest but your response to being told that your china's features dont look very asian is kind of wild, especially considering op was an asian person. Like, the fact a non-asian creator received criticism by an affected minority and basically told them that they were wrong about how their own ethnic background looks is kind of insane?? Especially when like, they offered advice on how to make it look more accurate. I know that your intentions likely weren't to do that and you were just being defensive because,,,, who isn't when accused of racism, (like i feel you) but I think you need to realise that there's nothing that screams "I don't care what minorities think" more than... effectively telling a POC you know what their people look like more than they do. Really, all it took was being open to criticism, and being willing to play around with his features to see if they could be adjusted (hm,,, maybe make the eyes less centred so they dont look so heavy set, go a little easier on those very obvious eyelids, etc) to look more asian instead of the artistic version of skull measuring (/J) lolol. Anyways thats just my two cents

I might sound a bit incoherent or blunt but I just have a migraine and this day has NOT been good /gen

As I stated before I 100% understand where people were coming from in regards to it and that I don't take the issue of whitewashing/making things eurocentric lightly and that I do take care to make characters look like the ethnicities they belong to.

Sometimes things look wonky! Shit happens!!

Quite frankly I was being defensive but to go ahead and once again assume ill intent and that that defense was some "I know better than you" rhetoric is exactly why I was defensive in the first place.

someone pointed an issue out, I said that I have that noted for future reference and that this was very clearly a one off issue, and that Im also showing that the sketch was poorly positioned but the lower nose bridge is still present and that bad faith and bad intentions should not always be assumed. Honestly this should have really just been a one and done move on situation especially for a sketch I did in less than five minutes.

I'm also just extremely 3-Dimensional in the way in which I think when it comes to the art process which is why I included the drawings not because of some weird "skull measuring" thing (which wouldn't even have made sense in the context anyways and honestly wild to even accuse someone of doing). I just could not word it without writing out an essay or some incomprehensible word vomit. I was just using a tactic commonly found in animation where you use "onion skins" to find the next breakdown/inbetween in the sequence to help show how he would have looked like from a front facing perspective with a neutral facial expression.

I'm not saying that I don't care or that I know more than them, and that is actually pretty close to the opposite of what I said verbatim!

I just felt the need to note that the features I showed are valid features and that simply reducing all people of east asain decent into having the same exact face (or just nose) shape is weird especially considering how much diversity there is. There are a wide variety of features in China and to go ahead and say that only ONE of them is valid and should be depicted is something that SHOULD receive push back not matter any previous context, which is what I was pointing out in the first place.

[lxrd-ren]

(Fuck me man did I actually crack it-)

Hmm, what if q!Bad being effected by the soul vultures is inherently a good thing?

I mean looking at the wiki for both the soul vulture and the soul stealing potion, it is pretty fucking powerful. I mean you could theoretically suck the life out of someone and use their soul to better yourself. I feel like q!Bad would 100% use this to his advantage

I've headcannoned how q!Bad has very destructive powers to the point where he can't use them cause he'll hurt and destroy everything. Perhaps this whole soul steal potion is his plan to get powerful enough to destroy the federation without hurting anyone else

I've put some thought into it and I think it makes sense

Obviously he found out about these potions from Dapper. But from what we know (and could see) Dapper only ever made the potions by sacrificing his health to the soul vultures

Me thinks the blue spots on q!Bad is from him consuming the soul potion instead of making it. I mean, we didn't see any spots on Dapper right? Meaning the blue spots has to have come from something else. But the blue is so similar, it HAS to have come from the soul vultures in some way. It being a side effect of drinking the potion me thinks is logical enough, and it makes sense that q!Bad is drinking it as he knows from Dappers notes how powerful it is

It also kinda explains the worker in his basement. Sure q!Bad has questioned it and maybe even tortured it, but q!Bad phrased it as an 'investigation' or 'project'. Surely q!Bad knew the worker wouldn't have much information, so why take it in the first place? Well, I think he'd go to these extremes if he had an ulterior motive. Namely, investigating whether the soul steal potion would effect federation employees aka could q!Bad use it against the federation

AND THE TIMING WORKS. When we saw the worker last, it was caged and locked up in q!Bad's basement. Let's say during that time period, he worked out that the worker is indeed effected by the soul stealing potion. And so, seeing this success, q!Bad starts taking the potion. And look at that, the black patches appear the next fucking day. And not 2 DAYS LATER, the blue spots start appearing.

And nearly everyday since, we've seen him either go back to the basement or the soul vultures, presumably to either make the potions or consume it. Oh and look at that, the blue has gotten worse and worse over time, almost as if he's drinking more and more of it

Motherfucker even said at one point:

"All according to plan."

Plus, I remember seeing one post saying how they don't think q!Bad is torturing the worker but rather experimenting on it like Dapper would experiment on shit. I'd say testing if a soul stealing potion would work on the employee is definitely experimenting on it

But I think we should definitely keep in mind the uh, ahem, other side effects.

Such as q!Bad becoming more violent, more hysteric, less empathetic, aka, losing his humanity, almost as if he's losing his own soul by getting hurt by the soul vultures and instead is regaining souls through the soul vulture potion, but ofcourse the souls aren't the same so bit by bit he's becoming more like one such as looking like one (the blue spots all over him), acting more like one (being more violent), sounding more like one.. (those noises we keep hearing at the end + start of stream)

..just saying we might see some soul vulture wings on q!Bad pretty soon..

(K but holy shit imagine the fanart that would look so fucking cool)

[felassan]

Some more possible scraps of interest from possible DA:D leaks on Reddit, from another Reddit user, under a cut due to DA:D spoilers:

first, the usual set of disclaimers that should be kept in mind with all leaks: might not be real, unable to verify at present, sometimes leakers think they’re right about things but are unintentionally incorrect or got some wires crossed, games change a fair bit between development phases and final release, the opinion-based stuff is completely subjective, take with grain of salt etc.

I tried to gather comments together in bundles where it would make sense (if on the same or related topics).

-

They commented on the timepoint of development that their information is from, saying "It's up to date." and that they played much more recently than last October. Someone asked "Alright so this is like alpha or pre-alpha video right? Which means what we see is subject to drastic change." (basically asking if they played the same build as the Reddit leaker who shared screenshots/gif) and they said "Ehh, that would be based on how soon it’s released. Because I’ve playtested it recently, and if that video is old, then they’ve changed essentially nothing about it and probably don’t intend to lol." "Between when your comment was first written and now, I’ve learned enough to be convinced that it was indeed from at least a year ago, so you were right. I’ve just played a much more recent version." "Nope, completely different. But I read through it thoroughly just now, and that person is right. Based on the write-up [Insider Gaming report], it is pretty old. They’re talking about missing textures and placeholders. In my playthrough, they could’ve told me the game was done and I would’ve believed them. Definitely wasn’t from the same test." So it sounds like folks leaking played different builts/different playtests at different times.

Someone asked a bit more detail about what playtesting involves and they replied "Certain part of the game. I played specific missions, story missions, so I wouldn't know anything about the sidequest fluff." "I played in the middle because that’s how most controlled tests for games work. You almost never just hit “new game” and start from the beginning."

Reddit user: "Rook is the name of the protagonist. Like “Inquisitor” was in DA:I." Someone speculated that Rook would be a fridged prologue companion like Jenkins Masseffect (F) and they replied "As someone who has played the game, don’t try your hand at the lottery for a while lol."

Reddit user: "Grey Warden isn't the class" [of the character seen in some of the screenshots] "I’m not confirming or denying the existence of different origins, but “Grey Warden” was not the class."

Reddit user: "I've played it. You can't directly control party members. A more apt comparison (and it's extremely weird that they didn't reference this [referring to the first Insider Gaming report] considering it's another bioware franchise) is Mass Effect. It's exactly like ME's wheel where you hold RB or whatever it was, and choose what ability they use." "They can always change it, but I've played it and unfortunately, I can confirm. I personally don't care as I never switch to companions in games where you can anyway, but it's exactly like ME in that aspect."

Reddit user: "Given the timing, I'm 99% sure his source is someone I played with." "Nothing in the leak that was stated definitively is incorrect." [referring to the first Insider Gaming report]

Reddit user [re: combat]: "I've played it, and tbf, it was closer to XV than to say, DA:I" "Combat felt like Andromeda with melee weapons. Take that for what you will lol." "XV was in reference t the combat wheel. It wasn't over the top at all though, it played like a typical action game (ie not teleporting everywhere)." "I've beaten all 3 [existing DA games] and have played Dreadwolf. It's nothing like the other games. It's action combat. Grounded though, not in a fantastical way like DMC." "I don't remember a wheel in XV, but then again I havent played it in a long time. What it is exactly like though (and them not using this descriptor makes me feel like they don't play bioware games) is Mass Effect. I've played it. The wheel is exactly like the ME games."

Reddit user [re: combat, when someone was asking about hack 'n' slash]: "It's more like Inquisition, although I wouldn't describe it as either. Plays like an action game." "What they meant [in the Insider Gaming article] is that it plays like an action game. So not like any of the DA games" "I described my playtime to friends as "Andromeda but melee"." "I thought it was fun. Funner than the DAs of the past. However I never really took advantage of all the tactical options in Bioware games, so if there's someone who is looing forward to that, they'll probably have significantly less fun than I did." They also confirmed the existence of skill trees, a map, choosing the PC's class, companions who used classes and jumping & a jump button. They said that there are 4 ability slots ("I was only ever able to use 4."). There's blocking but not parrying. Stats are levelled up automatically like they are in DA:I, so no skill points to allocate manually. "I’ve played it with 3 companions and 4 skills."

They confirm the following infos from the first Insider Gaming article:

- "The game still lacks features;" The game is missing voice lines and has a lot of placeholder text. - "Dreadwolf has a lot of similarities with previous games in the franchise;" AND "You can recruit members to your team"; The article basically just describes a Dragon Age game. ***POSSIBLE SPOILER*** "It’s understood that you’ll be able to move from your hub to missions by passing through a mirrored portal." - "You cannot control your team members, but you can issue commands to cast abilities;" Key word here is currently perhaps - "Combat will be hack n' slash-like and will be like Final Fantasy XV;" The article did not say it's hack n' slash like FF15, but the combat wheel itself is more like FF15 (I never played FF15 so I don't know if it's a time-slow type ability wheel or what).

and added on this topic, "I can confirm 75% of what that person has said, and the other 25% I just never experienced. Don't know why they would lie about it." "Unless they change it in the future, you can't directly control companions." "I've played it and can confirm everything in that article except for the release date and multiplayer stuff. You cannot directly control your companions, and its full hack and slash" "Other than what I didn't experience (multiplayer/hub) it's all true. Down to the part about a 1/10th of the lines not being recorded yet." "I can confirm almost everything in that leak." "Multiplayer I didn't experience, nor did I experience the hub world that was described, although the portal thing is true." "The hub thing he described, I never played, but I did use the portals he was talking about." They also commented on the missing voice lines, "It's implemented, they're just not all there yet. During my playthrough Id say maybe a 10th of the lines were missing, and a good amount of the monster sounds." "Oh for sure, it’s definitely not a mess at this stage. On the contrary, the environments are pretty beautiful. Only things that were missing were a few audio clips."

Reddit user [re: mirrored portrals and an open world]: "I can't confirm the existence of one, I could've just never experienced it from my time with the game, but I myself never played anything that could be considered open world. Funny enough, I never thought about that until your question just now. But it would make sense from what I played."

Reddit user: "Combat's are great, cutscenes' are decent. Best ever as far as Bioware is concerned (which should be a given). What's not great are the facial animations. Granted the game isn't done yet (and might be far from done, who knows), but as of rn, it's Andromeda 2.0"

Reddit user [re: not controlling party members]: "It's true." "Unless they change it sometime before release, which I doubt, I can confirm that you cannot." "I can confirm. You can't directly control them." They also commented that companion control felt like Mass Effect.

When someone said "i hope they don't mean a real "action" combat, and it would still have those Dragon Age" they replied "That's exactly what they mean." Someone mentioned no party member control and hack n slash, FF combat and they replied "Can confirm, both are true. I wouldn't say "will be like XV", and technically that's not what he said either. What he meant was that it's more of an action combat, not that you'll be teleporting around." Someone asked if it compares to Elder Scrolls and they said "Uhhh, yeah I guess. I usually play Elder Scrolls in first person, so that comparison would be kinda weird to me, but third person elder scrolls I guess would be more accurate than any of the past DA games. ES combat has no weight to it though, and this has weight. For real, it plays like Dark Souls games if you took out the invincibility frames and all the things that make them "hard"."

Someone asked about the party size, and they replied "Yeah, 2 party members and then a third based on what mission you're playing. Weapon wheel to control 3 abilities each for the two companion's you've brought and then 4 of your own abilities." "Now I will say, Idk how far I was into the game, so it's possible that it'll eventually open up to 3 of your choosing, but I played multiple missions and the third person was whoever you were helping at the time." "It’s still 4 [party members in total, so PC+3]."

Someone asked about what's happening to Solas and they replied "I have no idea lol. He was mentioned in passing seeing as he's the big bad now, but I never saw him or anything." "in Mass Effect for instance right? WHat Sovereign was up to wasn't described in every main mission. It wasn't even described in most of them."

Reddit user: "The look of the hair was pretty damn good I will say, the physics of it though, I didn't really pay attention to. Everything about the graphics looked sufficiently next gen, except for the facial animations. They're still Andromeda level, maybe a step up." "Everyone else's hair is great. Your character's hair is...decent." "Graphics are sufficiently next gen except for facial animations. They were the one stand out." "Movements are less stiff feeling, even when people are still. Animations and movement are better as well. They were satisfying to me, but of course, that’s subjective." "visuals and performance were pretty solid from my experience. That could obviously change though."

On facial animations someone asked them "You said that facial animations were only a bit better than those in Andromeda, but how do they compare to Inquisition? Because I think in Inquisition they were somehow better or at least didn't stand out that much like in Andromeda, despite the latter being newer game. I think I'll be okay with them being just a bit better than in Inquisition" and they replied "I’m looking at clips of Inquisition now and I think you hit the nail on the head when you said “at least didn’t stand out as much” because tbh, Inquisition and Andromeda weren’t that far apart in that aspect, they were definitely made using the same process, but Inquisitions somehow don’t stand out as much. Idk whether it’s because a lot of the people talking aren’t human or what. But it looks more like that than Andromeda. But because technology has gotten better, it looks better than both. I guess the conclusion is it still has that stiffness that both of them have, where it looks a couple steps removed from a robot that gets told to move pieces of their face X way at X time, but then at the end come back to Z position. So I guess I’d say the faces look and move like an HD Inquisition. I would’ve compared it to that instead of Andromeda, but I never realized they were so similar until you pointed it out lol."

Reddit user: "Yup, a KO for you is game over." [a KO for the PC]

Reddit user: "The maps feel like they could've came from DA:I design wise."

Reddit user: "It feels the same but different. I know that's an incredibly bs non-answer but it's true. It feels like a 2023 Bioware Dragon Age. For better or for worse. Anybody expecting DA:I 2 will be disappointed." "It'll probably be worth it [the wait] in the sense that DA fans will find it passable. But at this point (keep in mind the game still isn't done) it's not something that feels like it took 10 years to make or anything. Which is probably due to them reportedly restarting development multiple times." "I'd say most things about the game definitely feel more like Andromeda then DA:I" "If they keep it pretty much the same as my playtest, average players will be happy, but people who play Dragon Age games specifically for the Dragon Age gameplay probably won’t be. It’s completely different."

Someone asked about whether it answers DA lore questions, and what the storytelling/spread of storytelling is like and they said "I was dropped in and out of missions, so idk, but I will say it has A LOT of story elements from DA:O" and then "Same answer"

On characters they said "I didn't spend a significant enough amount of time to make that call [whether they're as interesting as the chars in DA:I. they're quirky though" "I think the character designs are sick, but that's completely subjective." "I wouldn't say I had enough time with the characters to get emotionally invested." Also someone asked if the characters are 3D, realistic and complex and they replied "Stereotypes unfortunately". Someone asked how the dialogue compares to ME:A, expressing the opinion that their "biggest issue with MEA was the MCU-esque style of writing that made the dialogue sound like it was ripped from bad tumblr fanfics. I couldn't take most of the cast seriously because they sounded more like caricatures than real characters." They replied "😬 bad news my man. What you just described is exactly how I would describe it.

Reddit user [re: armors]: "Im not sure how to answer that. Nothing really stood out, if that helps. But then again, idk what parts of the game I played. Could've been closer to the beginning where you just get the plain stuff."

Someone asked them "was the camera a tight over-the-shoulder cam like Andromeda, or was it more zoomed out / character centered like DAI / other 3rd person games?" and they replied "Zoomed out, but then tight when you use the weapon wheel (which youll be using a lot)" The other user asked if it was like Mad Max, and they said "Actually that's not a bad comparison. Picture the camera a bit further out though." On tac cam, they said "I was part of the leakers playtest. As of now, there is literally no tactical camera, but like you said, who knows if they’ll add it sometime before release. Just don’t get your hopes up."

Someone asked them "Does it feel like a medieval fantasy game still? It looks so sci fi to me, like the eluvians are shitty Rick and morty style portal guns all of the sudden. Does the neon purple take away from that feeling at all?" and they replied "It didn’t feel sci-fi to me but it sounds like you’re referring to a deeper level than just baseline aesthetics, and for that I think it’d be subjective. If you’re not though, no it still felt distinctly fantasy. Some parts more medieval than others." Someone also asked about warriors breaking stuff in the world, mages restoring terrain and rogues picking locks and they replied "Let’s just say…the game doesn’t play in a way that requires those anymore."

Reddit user: "Map design was one of the best parts, and boy were they gorgeous. The greenery specifically was the only thing in the game where I was like "This is exclusively next gen, like they couldn't have done this on last gen"."

Reddit user: "I thought it was fun, but I mean fun is subjective. Things were changed about the series that some long time fans will hate and some people who never liked Dragon Age will now love, such as the lack of tactical options." "I thought the combat was fun, but fun is subjective ya know? For instance, you guys already know that all the tactical stuff is gone, and for someone looking for that, they wouldn’t find it fun. I guess the takeaway could be that it’s by no means bad. Footage and screenshots are real. That’s 100% the game."

Reddit user: "I’ve played it. Recently. And all of the things people are giving the “year old” line in reference to are still the case. So the likelihood of them being changed are very slim."

Someone asked them "Hello! Could you share (or hint in some way) if some of the characters from previous games will make an appearance? (Beside Varric and Solas, obv). Some old leaks implied Bioware considered dual protagonist at some point, so I'm wondering if it turned into something. Or, at least, any mentions about Inquisition?" and they replied "[besides Varric and Solas] Literally the only people I saw/heard about lmao, sorry. I also never experienced anything regarding dual protagonists."

Someone asked them "Did it look to be anywhere near close to done??? I mean it's kinda a dumb question because on one hand I think you may have only played a certain area... On the other though I don't know anything about why you playtested, nor do I want to but, I am interested in knowing more about the overall size, comparison of detail to say like anything new gen, and whether or not they incorporated newer tech such as haptics, adaptive triggering, graphic upgrade and is the story intriguing or pushed... You know.". They replied:

"No no, that’s not a dumb question at all. Tbh, they could’ve said it was releasing at the end of the year and I’d believe them. The only thing I could see that wasn’t finished were the voice lines, and not even that many weren’t recorded. Maybe 1/10th. Graphics were superb except for the facial animations (and given Andromeda, that might just be how they’re going to stay). Controls were solid, enemies were solid, abilities were solid, UI and menu all looked unique and finished. General gameplay was in a finished state. Had a couple glitches here and there but nothing that couldn’t easily be ironed out.

[re: about the overall size, comparison of detail to say like anything new gen] From what I played, it seems more instanced than open world like DA:I, so I can’t really compare it in size, and obviously the previous 2 games have been outclassed in terms of technology.

[re: whether or not they incorporated newer tech such as haptics, adaptive triggering] Not that I saw, but idk if that’s the type of thing they’d incorporate anywhere before near the end of development. You sound like you’d have a better idea of that than I would though.

[re: graphcis upgrade] Graphics are for sure upgraded. The flora in particular I would say wouldn’t have been able to be created before the PS5 gen. It’s that good. Environments, clothing, faces were up there as well (clothing and faces could’ve been better with your character, but everyone else’s were next gen).

[re: is the story intriguing or pushed] The thing about judging a story is that even the most interesting ones fall flat if you experience it out of order (unless that’s the author’s intention), which I did. Even with putting bits and pieces together from what the characters were saying, I really felt nothing because I was coming in mid storyline."

[source] <- read the comments in context for them to make the most sense ofc :)

Edit - Update:

New comment of interest from the user (thanku @ladymacbethsimp for letting me know!). Someone asked them "can you attribute a single emoji to every companion you saw? like an out of context spoiler kind of thing". They replied "Hmmm I can try…" and posted these three emojis/series of emojis:

The screenshots I have included here are screenshots of the same comment from 2 different devices side by side, as emojis/emoji groupings can change appearance depending on OS etc.

so.. an elven Black man, red hair woman and woman mage?

[kingprinceleo]

Hi there! Playlist anon again. I listened to the whole thing and here are my thoughts. I hope this isn't over reaching cause I really enjoyed it overall and would love to see the rest 🙏🏽. Buckle in this is longgg

Rivers is a Vampire- Sonic would dance fight Shadow to this song (like in the original puss in boots, look up the scene I swear it's great).

Loose Cannon- it's both so Shadow and Sonic coded but it's funnier if it's Shadow realizing he likes Sonic. More likely it's supposed to be Sonic @ Shadow and it really fits. 10/10 putting it on my personal playlists.

Genius - this is Sonic having a jam sesh in his bedroom. 7.5/10 very in character, you're going to make me start liking rock music.

Assassin- 9/10 Shadow in his emo boy bag. The verses feel like Shadow in his head thinking he's hot shit (he's right), but the chorus feels like Rouge trying to talk him down. Overall big fan.

Lost- Honestly really love the vibes of this one. It sounds like Sonic and Hoax fighting/ talking or just Sonic debating with himself. Love the jaunty music with the sinister undertones.Fading World- 7/10(<- could be higher depending on personal taste) A nice interplay between Sonic's cheery friendliness and Shadow's.... everything. A nice world building song if that makes sense. If vamp au! were a level in a game this would play.

Moon Trance- A vampire nobility song if that makes sense. Kinda gives off Blaze if Sonic were dropping in with EDM beats. World building song.

Phantom of the Opera Overture- Shadow once again in his emo bag. Listening to this I imagine him dramatically posed as Ophelia in the river as Rouge looks on utterly unimpressed. Another world building song.

Dear Wormwood- 10/10 Devastating. This feels like when Shadow discovers Rogue is a vampire (if that's still canon?) and could work for the Sonic/Hoax reveal but to a much lesser extent.

Galacta Knight Theme- 5/10. Not bad but I'm not entirely sure how it fits. Feels like a world building song but lacks the rock and goth roots of its predecessors. I wanna say it feels like an Eggman song?

Trouble- Rouge song very fun (Shadow if you get a microscope). Good for a chase scene or playful fight.

Look What You Made Me Do Remix- Shadow after Sonic sneaks an extra sip of blood. 8/10 Shadow wouldn't be a Swiftie but he would bop to a song or two.

Bodies- GODDDDD 10/10. Shadow tracking a vampire to a party in his vulture outfit and having to maneuver his way to stealthily kill them (can't remember clearly if Shadow's actively a vampire hunter in the au rn but you get the vibe /pos).

Vampire Culture- like I said before Shadow being a hater /pos. Somebody get this boy a weighted blanket he needs to chill 8/10. I imagine he plays this as he puts on each vampire repellent stud and piercing.

The Magic 8- A very Sonic song in message but also Amy with the talk of magic. Funky duet? They'd probably sing this at Shadow 9/10.

Who's in Control- 10/10 Another Sonic/ Hoax talking song (I interpret their dynamic to be that Hoax has less inhibitions than Sonic and is overall allowed to be looser. hopefully that's close).

Why Do I- Sonic after Shadow realizes he's Hoax and they have a falling out. It feels do very Teen Beach Movie /pos. He'd get a whole musical number with backup dancers and rad sad choreography.

Blood Red Moon- World building song. Funnily enough I think you'd introduce Shadow with it. Dark foggy night, random vamp running away/ person being attacked by one, cut to Shadow standing ominously with a lightning strike for good measure. Lowkey has cowboy vibes.

Born of a Star- Feels like a happy future. The type of track that would play towards the end of a boss fight.

Drumming Song- 8/10. Very much an Amy song I like it a lot plenty of witchy vibes. Feels like it would play when she performs a powerful spell/ ritual (not sure exactly how her magic works). The chorus especially also sounds like Shadow describing the effect Hoax has on him :).

You've Created a Monster- Shadow. That's the review. This plays during a hunt or just during his morning routine. Just goofy enough to hide the emotional turmoil but serious enough to show his issues 8/10.

This is Why- Shadow whenever he sees Hoax. He's his biggest hater. Also Shadow at his job with Knuckles (he's about to punch someone's teeth in).

Figure 8- Sad Shadow hours. Probably around the time he just met Hoax and made the deal. Sounds like he's questioning his whole identity :(.

Shoot to Kill- 6/10 World building song. It's giving gathering of elders in the vampire kingdom.

Punching Bag- I've been associating the Set it Off songs with Sonic so far so at first I was thrown for a loop, but honestly? I can see him singing this after someone (Shadow) tries to kill him. It can also be a Shadow song but I find the Sonic angle very interesting.

Vampire- 9/10. ROUGE SONG. She's about to rob a man, GOOD FOR WOMEN.

Sirens- Not sure exactly this would apply to but very fun. Sounds like Shadow falling in love in a very overdramatic way but could also be Sonic. 8/10

Again sorry for the length and I hope I didn't interpret anything egregiously wrong 😭

I think the band In This Moment and their albums GODMODE, Mother and Ritual could maybe fit.

Thanks again for sharing :)🙏🏽

~🩸🎵

anon i am literally kissing you on ur nonexistent smooth gray mouth HHJDFHHSDH this is the nicest thing anyones ever given me im so giddy about this DHFSHFHSDJDSF that being said this is gonna get so long so i am adding the under cut LOL

Rivers is a Vampire- youre so fucking right for this and i wanna draw it so bad ... JKDFJKSJKF

Loose Cannon-set it offs elsewhere album is a whole banger and highly recc the whole thing >:]]] and this song is a shadow centric one ! about how hes always on the edge around everyone bc of his paranoia, and esp around hoax lol, he gets mad about being called out </333

Genius - sonic jamming to this is also so correct fdjghjdfg contrary to shadow, sonic in vampire au is just here to have a good time LMAO (u should get into rock :} BDSFBH its fun here)

Assassin- this one is rlly interesting to me bc the ENTIRE thing is intended to be a shadow callout post from sonic/hoax pov. i would not have considered this being shadow reflecting on himself at all ! but damn the rouge pov also works out really well too, i never considered that either! (originally i figured the only rouge mention would have been 'you hear whispers when were just talking' which would have been sonic and rouge talking to each other and shadow thinks they are conspiring </3)

Lost- this one is a lil complicated in my rat brain shdfhj !! this one is shadow pov! its like. about his perspective shifts across the plot in vampire au- first trying to hide from the scary vampires </3 and the screams are getting louder line ....is about maria...... i eated that part up.... "please dont find me im not ok" is a very shadowcore line and the final lost chorus meant to rep shadow eventually becoming 'lost' in what scared him but like. embracing it. this one. is hard to convey JJSDFJSD prob would need art to get across what i mean i suppose Fading World- this one is a Maria and GUN song ! :]c (dont worry about the fact its bass boosted. i am just guy who likes bass......)

Moon Trance- close !!! silver and mephiles :3333 jbhdfjdj(meph is blazes royal advisor so it does tie back to her kingdom ehe). boys who prowl and will bash your head in to this in the woods somewhere

Phantom of the Opera Overture- "Shadow once again in his emo bag. Listening to this I imagine him dramatically posed as Ophelia in the river as Rouge looks on utterly unimpressed. Another world building song." I NEED TO DRAW THIS SO FUCKING BAD AHAHH u are SO FUCKING RIGHT FOR THIS. side note, a general rule of thumb (not always but a lot) anything that sounds this fucking dramatic is shadow pov and how he imagines vampires, the real guys are just chilling dfbhgfhsd with their nerd music. shadow is vampires #1 hype man without even realizing

Dear Wormwood- this one is Primarily a shadow and GUN song !! tho there are little tidbits of others who he has discovered lied to him like rouge eggman and sonic !!! (and yes shadow finding out rouge is a vampire is still canon >:])

Galacta Knight Theme-close with the eggman bit !! a theme for geebo <333(Lance)

Trouble- very correct vibes !! primarily rouge but i would add sonic in there too !! they both have that fun playful air to them tbh that i think a lot of people overlook in their canon dynamic hfgdhj

Look What You Made Me Do Remix- Shadow @ everyone tbh !! buttt primarily this is during his GUN arc when hes just so fed up with being lied to (he doesnt even know) i think if u remixed enough taylor swift into rock or metal he could get down to it fdgbjgdhjf

Bodies- YOURE SO RIGHT FOR THISSSS. esp the vulture part :]c... and the vampire hunter part is .. a little complicated ! he kinda is sometimes? theres a specific circumstance that makes him more willing to actively hunt and kill

Vampire Culture- he is absolutely blaring this in his mind while he gets ready lmaooo . big fan of weight blanket shadow tho dhgfdjg....something to draw.... fun lil fact tho... i imagine that smooth voice to be the head of GUN....

The Magic 8- i think sonic is the one singing it! but its all about amy! about her arc with her desperation to prove herself, getting consumed by her ambitions, and working with dark magic :)

Who's in Control- the sonic and hoax angle is SOOO interesting to me! i would have never thought of it bc frankly they are chill af, he does not have much turmoil about it! this has always been a HUGE shadow song esp 'living in fear, living afraid, hysterical everyday"

Why Do I- this is actually shadow @ sonic !!! reverse hehehe. this is one of the more accurate songs lmaooo, like 'wake up in cold sweats screaming your name" this song is the canon point in time where shadow first realizing he has a crush on sonic !! sonic is the reason the bastard drinks </3333

Blood Red Moon- absolutely obsessed with your version of it oughhhh, but its always been an eggman song to me (esp with that laugh lol)! and one of his silly little schemes. defo gonna draw that shadow idea tho thats so sick (and it is SO cowboy. do not be surprised if it winds up in the desert vampire playlist)

Born of a Star- this one is a death song ! self reflection and "how did we get here"

Drumming Song- close with the chorus part ! but the entire thing is Sonic pov about how yummy yummy shadows blood is 😋 shadows heartbeat drumming in his mind !

You've Created a Monster- i was SO fucking confused when i saw this bc!!!! youtube is hiding that video from me "its not available" !! and apparently you can see it but i cant!!! im so mad but i also owe you my life bc i found the song again and it BANGS SO HARD and it is 100% shadow wanting to kill maim <3333 its also a 3 way song for shadow @ everyone/ Hoax @ shadow about how shadow seems to be forcing hoax to be the monster he fears to justify his hatred/ uh oh amy fucked up !!!!

This is Why- THE JOB ANGLE IS SO CORRECT AND FUNNY, obsessed with that. but also yeah shadow doesnt like outside </3 rouge is the one saying the coast is clear </333

Figure 8- the deal interpretation is so good...... thats all im ever gonna think about now. honestly "all for your sake, became the very thing that i hate, i lost my way, spinning in an endless figure 8" was meant to be a shadow talking about maria line! but thats all i really got from the song, the deal idea is so good.......

Shoot to Kill- i personally saw this as a shadow GUN song !! bro is more intense and focused than usual

Punching Bag- THIS CHANGED ME WTFFF, i was struggling to see it as shadow and GUN, but oh my fucking GOD, the sonic pov is so raw and i am OBSESSED with it. pissed him off one too many times !!!!!!!

Vampire- WE SUPPORT WOMENS WRONGS !!! YAY ROUGE!!!!

Sirens- this is a shadow and GUN song !! solace in their song is propaganda !! shadows ready to shoot !!! shake off some blues kill vampires !!! HES BACK IN THE NOOSE!!!! SONIC GIVE HIM ALL YOU GOT BECAUSE IF NOT THEYRE GONNA DROWN HIM OUT !!!!!!! ehe :]

i listened to Mother and couldnt immediately feel anyone out with it but ill look thru their other stuff and rack my brain !!! ty for the suggestion !!!! but omg ty SO MUCH this was so fun if u ever wanna hmu for the other playlists...... i am looking so hard.. (but no pressure !! this was already so much and im so grateful !!!)

[silvexus]

Re: Sometimes feeling species dysphoria as someone who doesn't ID as non-human - would you be willing to expand on that? It's okay if not - I don't want to pry - but I've never heard of someone having that experience before and think it might be valuable to the overall conversation.

That said the comparison to cis folks sometimes experiencing gender dysphoria makes intuitive sense to me, too.

Sure! I'll try my best to figure out how to articulate this in a way that makes sense and is also respectful (as someone who doesn't ID as non-human, I obviously do not want to appropriate experiences!) but I do fear it may not be as interesting as it sounds.

This got really long, so I'm putting in a read more, oops!

For clarification, I experience psychosis (since childhood) and have neurological disorders. I think the combination of these things is what causes what I'm about to try to describe, though I would certainly not try to say that the only thing that can cause species dysphoria is this sort of experience, nor would that would make someone's experience any less valid if they chose to ID as non-human if they were in a similar situation. Everyone is different, after all!

Primarily, this thing I equate to species dysphoria manifests as two different things that I tend to describe as non-human body language and non-organic yearning.

Non-human body language isn't as encompassing as I'd like it to be, but it's hard to articulate. My limbs don't feel right sometimes; disproportionate to each other, maybe. My spine feels wrong; too short, maybe? That could be the scoliosis causing both of these things, but it happens in my arms sometimes too. I don't know what it wants to be, however. There's ways my body wants to move to convey ideas to others than I can't emulate properly. My vocal mimicry is good, but not good enough, though I wouldn't really tell you what calls I'm supposed to make. I do trill a lot, when I can.

My teeth aren't quite sharp enough, I know that. And would a tail help? Would upright, pointy ears? A crest of feathers? I wouldn't mind a crest, I think, but then the moment passes and what I have is... acceptable. Fine. I am here, in this place, and my nerves are made of fire.

In a more permanent fashion, I bunt people to show my affection, but even when I physically can't it is a constant urge. (I nearly broke poor @/sattarehi asking if I could bunt him.) It's easier to move on all fours sometimes, or just in ways that are unintuitive to a human blueprint. To curl around people while we're sitting on the edge of a bed, them sitting up, me on my side to encircle them, in a way I don't see others doing often. The way I hold my arms sometimes feels like the resting position of something else; holding them at my sides like a person is expected to feels wrong, like it'll impede my ability to flee if I need to. (From what? Is that the paranoia? The hypervigilance? The nerves again? The various and sundry neurodivergencies?) When I'm socially allowed to cross my arms it helps, but it's not quite perfect.

Sometimes, the fact that I cannot do these things more effectively (though my brain does not grant me the knowledge of what that would look like), that I am considered eccentric and strange for doing them at all, pulls at something in me that doesn't speak in any language I have access to.

As an aside that may only slightly be relevant, my social integration is interesting. People who are friends or close associates or even people I think of fondly become extensions of us in a way that isn't so much possessive, but in the same way a tight knit family group might be among certain animals. (Which is why when people ask 'do you experience romantic love?' I can't honestly say. This is already quite intense, you want me to try and define it further?) And that's to say nothing of the prey drive. The human prey drive is intense enough, and I can certainly repress it well (I can't believe PvP games were good for something) but mine feels a little overtuned.

... So the non-organic yearning is fun to try and figure out, but it provokes the same feelings, so I'll try to articulate it just in case it helps!

It feels like I am made of something deeper. Something farther. Here, there, everywhere. I feel like I am floating adrift in a dark sea, unable to drown or sink, though surely I must. Surely I must. And yet.

It isn't an invincibility. It isn't a belief in a higher power or an afterlife. For the sake of my health, I cannot believe in these things. (We shan't talk about my childhood delusions, but they were quite elaborate! You could tell I was into world religions as study subject as a child.)

But sometimes I look into the sky and feel it staring back, like I am stuck in a Polaroid that an old friend keeps looking at to remember me. I look at pictures from all of our instruments that turn into the infinite dark beyond our planet and my brain thinks I want to go home the same way I do when I see my hometown on a map. I am not from here, something in me insists. I am from nowhere, but I am certainly not from here. Is that the intergenerational trauma? The thing that infects you and fills in where your grandparents' language and food and culture is supposed to be? The remains of what a war before you were born left behind? Or is it something else?

It feels like something else, the same way sometimes my body feels wrong in the same, but different, way that it always feels wrong. It feels like whatever I am, separate from this meat suit and these mutinous neurotransmitters, is from somewhere else. That it knows this. That it wants to go back.

Not all of my body dysmorphia is neatly gender dysphoria. Species dysphoria, as a term, helps gather these experiences up neatly, even if I don't identify as non-human. I am human. I am a strange, eccentric human, even if I feel like Something Else Wearing A Human Skin, but ultimately human regardless. Despite that, almost. Maybe, in a strange, contradictory way, I'm both. Human is what I want to be, at the end of this day. But regardless, it does help me understand things a bit more than someone who doesn't have the same experiences, I think. And maybe this will change in the future as my understanding of myself grows! I'm a whole adult, but I'm growing every day, you know?

(You know that book, Casual Rex? And they made it into a show pilot/TV movie called Anonymous Rex? And it was about dinosaurs barely surviving their extinction and pretending to be human and they wore disguises to blend in? There's a scene where a character describes another character as "she's a human pretending to be a dinosaur pretending to be a human!" Life feels like that sometimes.)

[aspiring-holistic-otaku]

Season 3 Ramble #8 - A is for Anime(solo reprise) ver.3

Hadn't been doing the run-up posting I usually do for my rambles due to work and such but here we are!

How this ramble is gonna go is I'm gonna list my top 3 movies watched this month then top 3 series for same, AAnd now that I actually have a semi decent number of anime under my belt I'm gonna do a quick top ten of both at the end.. after that if you wanna stick around, instead of the usual post ramble ramble, I'm gonna add a bit of the recording I did with the homies, as a sort of prelude and promise that we will have that conversation in future. I really think it's an important and potentially fruitful discussion to have.

But In any case getting into the episode now

TOP 3 MOVIES 

3) Belladonna Of Sadness (1973, 1hr33m, Mushi Production)

Crazy movie. I don't think I can accurately talk about it without it sounding too wHild… I'm still gonna, but I'm gonna open with what Google says about it.

A peasant woman is raped by the local lord on her wedding night. To take revenge, she makes a pact with the Devil himself who appears as an erotic sprite and transforms her into a black-robed vision of madness and desire.

As I said.. wHild… and that's just the summary…the details of the actual movie are like…woah.. but in any case it was great, actually something that'd been on my watch list for a good long while so I'm glad I could actually finally watch it. 

Glazing over the plot which the summary does a pretty good job of covering anyways, the visuals were absolutely stunning. They're by Yoshitaka Amano, probably most famously known for his final fantasy illustrations. For the most part the visuals are done in what looks like watercolor paint, which is just wild in my mind,, like wHy?? He definitely pulled it off though which is even more crazy cause a good amount of it was done in an almost slideshow kinda way which I usually don't like but he still pulled it off…crazy…. Should be kinda obvious from the summary but moderate tw. Still definitely strongly recommend.

Small sidenote - in making this ramble I found out that belladonna of sadness is actually part of a trilogy called animerama,, so now I have 2 more old ass movies to look forward to. Hopefully they're just as good or even better…

2) Lupin IIIrd: The Gravestone of Daisuke Jigen (2014, 51m, Telecom Animation Film)

Ever since I watched my first lupin movie 3 years ago I've been locked in. In fact it was such a good watch that I've limited myself to one a year. Thankfully the trend of awesomeness has continued up to this point but enough premature glazing. 

This movie is basically centered on Jigen, as you can probably tell from the title. Just a point of clarity for those who don't know much of anything about lupin, Jigen is basically the gunslinger of Lupin’s crew. So as this is basically his movie, he's ofc facing off against a gunslinger. The title is so named because this guy, the gunslinger they find themselves up against, makes graves for his victims before killing them. Nobody's ever gotten away from him. In fact he's so good that he uses dice to decide how many bullets he'll use to take out his target. Ice cold mf.

Pretty good action from start to finish though I’m a tad disappointed there wasn't more gun-slinging, though from what I gather Jigen’s whole thing is speed, accuracy and efficiency,, so maybe a barrage of bullets wouldn't have made sense. In any case we get to see all of the crew besides goemon, dry cry as he's my personal fav but still solid. The art direction was great from all angles as I've come to expect. Not too much to say cast wise as on Lupin gang’s side there's a cumulative effect of greatness where every time you see them it's generally a continuation of past interactions, as in there's an obviously rich history there. That being said, the dynamic is still great and from what I've seen, you can pick up any of the movies and immediately love them. But anyways, on the other hand, the main villain/organization felt a bit hollow. Which is something I've come to kind of expect with movie exclusive antagonists in general. It's just a matter of time efficiency. I think when it comes to anime movies, you're generally not watching for the antagonist unless they have to do with the main storyline. Otherwise you're kinda watching to see how the protagonist will beat them in about an hour. Though I will say as far as visuals can speak, they definitely spoke volumes in that sense. Also, given the geopolitical climate we're in, I liked the villain/organization and how they were handled... trying not to spoil too much there but if you so much as peek between the lines you probably get it.. In any case definitely highly recommend.

Side note - every lupin movie I watch further solidifies my decision to get into the series… just watching the movies first for some reason…

1) Mind game (2004, 1hr44m, Studio 4°C)

Honestly,, I don't even want to speak on it for fear of sullying its greatness. It's one of those life changing before and after watches fr. This is something I'd been really wanting to watch since ver.1 when I started getting into Studio 4°C through their awesome anthologies genius party and genius party beyond.

I'm gonna default to the anilist description here which is kinda almost decent relative to the sheer phenomenal amazingness of this movie.. but I digress.. so according to anilist..

Audiences will begin to grasp what they are in for early on, as loser Nishi, too wimpy to try to save his childhood sweetheart from gangsters, is shot in the butt by a soccer-playing psychopath, projecting Nishi into the afterlife. In this limbo, God - shown as a series of rapidly changing characters - tells him to walk toward the light. But Nishi runs like hell in the other direction and returns to Earth a changed man, driven to live each moment to the fullest.

The last bit hints at the greatness of this film. Right there that small difference in speech speaks volumes in my personal world of language. It's not just a movie. It's film. 10/10. absolute cinema.

As I said I don't even want to talk about it too much because I don't think it possible to do it justice through mere words, but I'm gonna put a bit more glaze on it before I wrap up the movie list and move on to series. This movie beat out studio ghibli’s, Miyazaki directed, howl’s moving castle in the 2004 Japan Media Arts Festival. Further, this was a debut work for the director Masaaki Yuasa, who would later go on to found science saru studio. I was so moved by this movie that I've decided I will watch everything masaaki yuasa has and will ever direct. 10/10. highly recommend. end of glaze.

hm: under the dog, Mezzo forte, blood: the last vampire, 4°c (sweat punch, short peace from last time)

Top 3 Series

3) Frieren: Beyond Journey's End (2023-2024, 28ep 24m, Madhouse) 

This is something I'd been seeing around for a bit but was intentionally ignoring because for some reason I got it in my head that it was based on this sad little one shot called The hero’s party on their way back home, and I was NOT watching an entire series based on that.

In any case, in talking with my bros recently they all insisted that it was the best anime released in the past year, one of them declaring it was in his top5 all time. So I pushed past my fears and binged it all in a day. V thankful for the bros.

The story here follows an elven mage called frieren and her life after defeating the Demon King and bringing peace to the world.

As you can tell from the summary it's largely a slice of life but it has its fair share of well placed scraps. It fills a certain fantasy gap where you get that day to day rose tinted indigenous peoples’ lifestyle feel, that I think most people would want if they actually lived in a fantasy setting,, not that constantly under threat from dragons and shit usually focused on. And as I said there are some well placed fights. The pacing also felt perfect. Like I almost felt bad binging it because I could tell that once a week watch would've been REALLY good… one of the few series I don't want to read the manga for, I'll definitely be watching weekly whenever season 2 drops..

Great cast though kinda small, pretty brilliant visuals and sound direction. Very very very solid all round, what I'd call supremely balanced tbh. One of the bros put it really well in that he said he has synesthesia so everything has colours for him, and the colours of every aspect of this show came together to paint the perfect picture. Now I don't have synesthesia myself but I could definitely feel, not just see, how well orchestrated it all was. definitely strongly recommend.

2) Tengen Toppa Gurren Lagann (2007, 27ep 24m, Gainax)

Yes. It's 2024 and I’m just watching gurren lagann and you'll hear why that is if you listen in to the post ramble ramble,, but suffice to say, you can never be late to true greatness and Tengen Toppa Gurren Lagann is definitely in that category. 

Firstly I kinda watched it as a meme seeing as last ramble I focused on the supposed relationship between sacred geometry and JoJo's bizarre adventure… if that sounds crazy then you should listen to the ramble… not that it'll sound less crazy but..yh.. anyways I was vaguely aware that gurren lagann focused a bit on spirals so I tapped in for the meme. 

To summarize the lengthy anilist summary,, In a far away future, mankind lives underground in huge caves, unknowing of a world above with a sky and stars. yada yada yada blah blah blah Simon, Kamina, Yoko, and the small yet sturdy robot, Lagann, journey to the world above and find that the surface is a harsh battlefield, and it's up to them to fight back against the rampaging Beastmen. Pierce the heavens, Gurren Lagann!

Again I'm gonna fall back on the words of another of my bros from the session, I think he had it in his top 10 or 5,, but he said he considers gurren lagann to be a perfect starter anime in that it perfectly showcases almost everything the medium of anime has to offer. Action, comedy, philosophy, slice of life, amazing cast, brilliant visual direction, solid sound direction. etc. the term “starter anime” gets thrown around a fair bit and I usually think it's a rubbish term because of how insanely diverse the medium is and how specific different individuals tastes can be,, so like to say this or that anime is a good “starter anime" never made sense.. but when he said it, that was the very first time I actually thought it made sense..

Definitely super highly recommend, a recommendation to pierce the heavens if you will.

1) Akiba Maid War (2022, 12ep 24m, P.A Works)

Gotta say it was a tough call between this and gurren lagann but it won out for 3 reasons. #1 it's shorter, and that's not a lazy pov, I just personally tend to give more ratings to shorter series in general because I think being able to do something amazing in a short amount of time deserves more props than doing so in a longer span of time. personally.. #2 it was FUNNY. AS. FUCK. I'm coming to realize that when it comes to anime specifically, comedy may be my favourite genre. I can't quite put my finger on why but I think it has to do with how far animation as a medium can push physical humor.. idk.. lastly… idek why I felt the need to justify all this…it's my list… but lastly,, and most importantly. maids. enough said..

The story here follows the dealings of different maid cafes in the town of Akihabara. I say dealings because in this show the maids basically act like Yakuza, having turf wars, extortion rackets and drug trades(just a point of clarity for those who've never heard the term, you've probably guessed but Yakuza are basically Japanese gangsters). In any case this is all under the table as they pay off the police and act the usual cutesy part in front of civilians. That may be a bit of a spoiler but a gif of it was going around a lot last year i think,, with this one maid gunning down a bunch of other maids and it was made to look like an idol rave with the glow sticks and everything + the “twist" if you can even call it that happens in episode 1 so it's not like some major turning point spoilers + "wars” is literally in the title, so with all due respect, you can bite me.. 

In any case, as I said this shit was funny ASF, mainly because of the opposing imagery of maids and yakuza they somehow pulled off perfectly.. like I can't begin to explain how crazy it is to see maids cussing each other out with the most obscene language, fighting it out in the craziest brawls, then turning around and going “welcome home master”. 

Fairly small but very strong cast, all funny in their own unique ways from the hardened criminal type to the frightened newbie. the visuals were great, sounds direction solid, I really really loved the op and ed, cause they just perfectly matched the shows energy. Kinda episodic for the most part but that fit the crazy, “you'll never guess what happens next” energy… Just great overall like wow.. a bit surprised I haven't seen it around more but I realize comedies don't tend to get that much ratings on release, if they do get attention it's further down the line as a “hidden jewel".

But in any case yes. 10/10. definitely highly recommend. please go watch this. have a good laugh, give thanks for life and go see the beauty of the world.

hm: Flying Trapeze, Goodbye Mr. despair (from s2)

Top 10 Movies (no order)

A Silent Voice, Memories (anthology directed by katsuhiro otomo), One Piece Movie 6: Flower Island, Tokyo Godfathers, Mind Game, Ocean Waves, Nausicaa Of The Valley Of The Wind, Sword Of The Stranger, the Lupin movies (just watch all of them lol), Maquia: When The Promised Flower Blooms

hm: Words Bubble Up Like Soda Pop, Animatrix, GITS Innocence, Wolf Children, Princess Mononoke

Top 10 Series (no order)

Tengen Toppa Gurren Lagann, Akiba Maid Wars, Nichijou, Hyouka, Mononoke, Sonny Boy, Tatami Galaxy(all spinoffs, movies, everything.), Steins;Gate, Dorohedoro, Angel Beats, Durarara!!(all seasons)

hm: Baccano!, Pluto, FLCL up to Progressive, Cowboy Bebop, chainsaw man