#the urge to paint the town pastel

[kylobith]

Little Town Tails

Chapter 1: New Beginnings

Summary: After saving up for years, Halsin fulfils his dream and opens his veterinary practice in a quaint little town.

Ship/Pairing: Halsin x Fem!Tav

Trope: Modern AU, Meet-cute, Little countryside town, Cosy

Word count: 1,441

Read it on Ao3 here

Listen to the dedicated playlist on Spotify here

Sunlight pierces through the cherry blossoms, dancing upon the cobblestone of the old arched bridge leading into Heawick. It is a quaint little town, tucked away between rolling hills dotted with hazel trees, a grove, and meandering streams. No modern architecture has defaced its landscape, leaving its traditional limestone facades to stand the test of time, which they did brilliantly.

After all, anybody lucky enough to settle down in Heawick can only fall in love with its old streets and picturesque shopfronts, and this urged most of the inhabitants to care for the outside of their homes almost as much as they did the inside. Those who are too old to tend to them can usually rely on the kindness of good-hearted neighbours, who do not hesitate to lend a hand for anything. Trimming the growing ivy without removing it, plucking juicy fruits from branches, cleaning windows; there is never a task too daunting when it comes to helping out.

It is early on a spring morning and the elderly man who lives nearest to the bridge has already been up and about for hours to water every planter lining up the road and hanging from the old lampposts with their flaky paint. Another project held captive in the neverending pile of documents and forms on Mayor Ravengard’s desk.

The bakery at the corner of the first crossing has long finished its first batches of pastries and bread, filling the air with mouthwatering scents. A few souls are already dragging their feet to its doors, still wiping the sleep out of their eyes as they seek some warm breakfast. On the opposite side of the street, a sweaty young man carries crates full of fruits and vegetables. He sets them up outside the greengrocer's shop, ensuring they are stable enough to sustain the shaking and bumping of passersby and customers.

Near the tiny park at the heart of the town, some owners walk their dogs, waving at neighbours and friends, wishing one another good morning when they have enough caffeine in their veins to wake them up. The barber reads his newspaper on one of the benches, seizing the opportunity to enjoy the first beautiful day of the season before going to work.

All is well in Heawick, as it always is. It is rarely eventful since so few people inhabit it.

‘Come here, Scratch. Good boy.’

While giving the white dog a loving pat between the ears, Halsin turns the sign on the door, officially opening his practice. He leans casually against the doorframe, his gaze fixed on the world beyond his house, a triumphant surge coursing through his veins. So many years of hard labour and sacrifice, this seemingly small victory holds the weight of a lifetime’s worth of dedication and perseverance.

After perusing office space offers on every website known to man and visiting many a wretched place, having found this little corner of paradise to establish himself was nothing short of a miracle. And what a place it is!

Everything is ready for him to welcome his first furry patients. After renovating the place himself, he designed a welcoming surgery for owners and animals alike, creating an environment in which he would not mind staying for hours on end every day. Each nook and cranny has been sterilised for the animals’ well-being and he dedicated a corner for the comfort of his own dog, whom he expects to become his official assistant. Photographs of Scratch and the pets of friends from his hometown printed on canvas are the only decorations in the waiting room, ornamenting the otherwise dull, pastel-blue walls. At the welcome desk, a duck he whittled himself sits on top of the counter between two bowls of treats; one for the pets, one for the anxious owners.

Karlach, his newly hired assistant, insisted on having more decorations brought in, but Halsin was more than hesitant to indulge her. While the young woman certainly is enthusiastic enough for both of them, he can tell that if he does not put his foot down, the practice would have stuffed animals from floor to ceiling.

After giving the place yet another proud look, Halsin walked over to the reception, sneaking a treat to Scratch on the way. He sits behind the computer and plays old-timey folk music from his music library. He stretches his back and spins around on his chair, kicking his feet.

Now he just has to wait.

While one of his favourite songs plays, he browses the latest wildlife photographs on the National Geographic website, smiling at the wholesome snapshots and zooming on each of them to observe any detail capturing his attention. He is halfway through the second page and sipping his cold herbal tea when the door opens and the little bell tinkles. His eyes shoot up and he stands from his chair.

But it is no patient. It is merely Melly, the baker’s mother, who comes to bring him some fruit pastries wrapped up in a small lavender-coloured box topped with a bow. As soon as she catches a glimpse of him, her eyes illuminate and she gives him a wave.

‘Good morning, Halsin, dear!’ she chimes.

Grinning from ear to ear, he bypasses the desk and comes to shake the old lady’s hand. Curled up on his cushion, Scratch looks up, but ignores her arrival and goes back to sleep.

‘Good morning, Melly,’ he greets her back. ‘What can I do for you?’

‘Oh, nothing, love, nothing at all! I came to see how you were faring on your first day.’

Halsin gazes around with a chuckle.

‘It has been quiet so far. In fact, you are the first person to walk in.’

‘Is that so? Ah, well, do not worry, dearie. The people in this town have been praying for a doctor and a veterinarian closer to home for decades. They will come.’

The thought warms up the man’s heart. Not that he has been worrying about the lack of patients so far, but he has come to wonder on multiple occasions about how long it would take for the first appointments to come in. He has bills to pay after all, and the renovation of what used to be a woodworker’s shop was not cheap, no matter how many things he did himself to save up on better equipment.

‘Would you like some tea, Melly?’

‘Oh, no, darling, thank you,’ she chuckles with a dismissing wave of her hand. The old woman hands him the lavender box. ‘I brought you this, thought you might need a little encouragement for your first day.’

‘How lovely of you, thank you!’

‘I will not linger, I fear that my old face would scare even the sickest hound away,’ she jokes while patting his shoulder. ‘Would you like me to take some of your business cards to display at the bakery? I’m sure that my son would not object.’

Melly does not even wait for him to respond before grabbing a quarter of the cards neatly stacked on the countertop. She shoves them in her cardigan’s pocket. The garment seems to have survived many decades, yet has retained its charm. Halsin always finds himself smiling at the sight of the ducks knitted around the waistline, complementing the beige diamond stitches all over it.

‘Do you need me to bring you lunch later, love?’

‘No, Melly, thank you. I have already planned my next few meals, but it is nice of you to offer.’

‘Very well,’ she smiles, patting his cheek. ‘You know where to find me if you need anything.’

‘I do. Thank you for everything.’

Out of courtesy, he accompanies her to the door, the pastry box seeming so tiny in his large palm, when it is a normal size in anybody else’s grasp. Before leaving, Melly turns to look at him, running a wrinkled finger underneath her chin.

‘Where is that eccentric assistant of yours? Is she not helping you today?’

‘Karlach? Oh, she is touring the neighbouring towns to leave calling cards in shops and town halls.’

‘Oh, good, good. What a tempest, this girl!’

Halsin laughs, scratching the back of his head.

‘She is, but I am sure that the animals will love her. I can already tell that she will love them first anyway.’

‘Well, as long as she works well…’

Without adding another word, Melly crosses the road, absent-mindedly waving at him while she looks around for cars. Once the old lady has returned to the bakery, Halsin takes a deep breath of countryside air and moves to close the door.

That is when he sees her.

[blarsh]

More about Ambrosine!

@perfectlovevn keeps reblogging, and I know they probably do that for most if not all fan art and ocs (which I assume bc they even reblogged my silly girlie) , which is SO cool and they're amazing for that, and the more it happens the more I feel special and want to post about her

So here we go!

First up, I made the understand my ship for Manipulation and Pre Milo since I already made one for Violence

I find it a little funny how much some of them overlap

Now for more little fun facts!

If any of the Milos give her flowers (which they stinking better) specifically real flowers, when they die she'll take the petals and make them into candles and give the candles to Milo. Or add them to her bath water for funsies

She does art too, and I think it'd be cool if she made gifted her her art to Milo, but each Milo would get a different form of art.

Pre Milo would probably get sketch and lots of drawings with pencils, charcoals, and oil pastels

Manipulation Milo I think would be the one to get paintings, be it water color, acrylic, or oil paintings

And Violence Milo I think would probably receive sculptures,some of which would be more fragile than others but I think if they were from her he'd treat them gently. Granted, this can all be subject to change, and is slightly headcannon-y

The violent urge to make her a river rat gnaws away at me, so a river rat she must be!

Oh how desperately I crave to know how it would go for her to take all the Milo's out on the river when they inevitably visit her home town

She would absolutely find a giant rock and tell Milo to pick it up and put it on the boat so she can take it home. I can imagine it'd be easiest for VMilo, but I think to think the other two would still at least try

The creator in their reblog said MMilo would pocket her hair, and she would absolutely just hand some to him one day after realizing he did that

He's a little freak and she loves it. That her little freak (tbh so is she)

Also, if you can't tell, gift giving is absolutely her love language

MMilo may be okay with it when she kicks him in her sleep even though legs should not stretch that way, but if he let's her do it too much he might end up with a bloody nose or even a missing tooth

It's like that scene from The Exorcist

Cue MMilo wearing a T-shirt that says "my gf beats the shit out of me in her sleep (and I'm into it)" lol

She sews too. Her and PreMilo be bonding over that probs

Speaking of PreMilo, sorry bout the deadlocking, it's not your fault it's her father's

I should make little doodles

[ecoamerica]

Watch the 2024 American Climate Leadership Awards for High School Students now: https://youtu.be/5C-bb9PoRLc

The recording is now available on ecoAmerica's YouTube channel for viewers to be inspired by student climate leaders! Join Aishah-Nyeta Brown & Jerome Foster II and be inspired by student climate leaders as we recognize the High School Student finalists. Watch now to find out which student received the $25,000 grand prize and top recognition!

[lizzievelnias]

VIOLENCE TW (it’s implied but paints hell of a picture) & ABUSE TW

“IT’S HARD TO TRUST WHEN ALL YOU HAVE FROM THE PAST ARE REASONS NOT TO …”

Have you seen LIZZIE VELNIAS around Faerune? They’re a WITCH who REJECTS the Unseelie Queen’s reign. People have heard they’re ADVENTUROUS, CHEERFUL & LOYAL but can also be BATSHIT, AIRY & CALLOUS. We’ll see where they fall when the revolution arrives, but until then they can be found working as a GRAVE DIGGER.

LIZZIE AT A GLANCE

NAME: Elizabeth Corie Velnias ALIASES: Lizzie - call her Elizabeth and she’ll set you on fire.  Only her mom called her that and she hates the name with a passion.  Pet names given to her by Scout:  Honeybee, Love Bug, Baby Girl.  From Geal:  Little One.  AGE: 26 [Born March 23rd] AFFILIATIONS: Nothing of note at the moment OCCUPATION: Grave Digger at the Faerune Cemetery.  With Geal stepping down to “take a break,” Lizzie has picked up a lot more responsibility at the cemetery. GENDER/PRONOUNS: Cis Female, She/Her SEXUALITY: Unknown.  Demisexual??? (still a virgin) QUIRKS: Emotionally stunted; Lizzie tends to act far younger than she really is.  Hair is permanently colored pink by magic as it’s Lizzie’s favorite color.  Her entire vibe is pastel goth/satanist.  Her bed is completely covered in stuffed animals that Lizzie likes to be buried under when she goes to bed. Crippling claustrophobia thanks to her mother.  She’s actually a very good skateboarder.  One of her favorite pastimes is going out with Scout to skate.  Lizzie likes to make a controllable flaming rabbit that she plays with; it reminds her of Mr. Rabbit and gives her a great deal of comfort.  Before meeting Scout one of the ways Lizzie coped with stress and had fun was kidnapping people and torturing them in the woods.  She still has the occasional aggressive urge and will stalk people because it’s funny and will kill every few months when she just can’t take it anymore.  That’s what’s so great about being a grave digger, it’s so easy to dispose of bodies.  But really, she’s trying not to kill so much anymore.  She doesn’t want to make Scout and Geal sad.  Besides her occasional lapses, Lizzie generally robs the bodies at the cemetery and will take various body parts to try using in dark magic.  Or to just collect them in resin jars because she thinks they look cool.  MARKEKTABLE/TRADE SKILLS: Lizzie mostly pawns off shit she finds with bodies, but she’s also been working with Scout to try to make different potions that she can use for trading.

BIOGRAPHY

Lizzie was always different from the other kids.  Maybe it was because there were rumors in town of her family being devil worshipers.  The other children would always stare at her, whispering to one another.  Sometimes they would throw rocks, calling her a demon.  This was a god-fearing town afte rall.

Sometimes the rumors get it right.  Her parents, especially Mother, cared more about their rituals, the underworld, more than anything else.  More than their own daughter.  And so, Lizzie was left to fend for herself, playing with her dolls quietly in her room.  She always had to be quiet.  Do as Mother wanted.  If not, she had to stay the night in the cupboard, and Lizzie never liked that.  It was dark, and scary, and full of spiders.

At nine years old things started to change.  Lizzie heard voices vibrating through the walls, the strongest coming from the forest near her town.  Late one night, she snuck out of her window and followed the quiet streets to the outskirts of town.  Wandering through the trees, the little girl tensed as she heard a rustling in the bushes.  A silent scream caught in her throat as something leapt out, only to transform into a relieved giggle at the long, fluffy ears.  It was a cute lil bunny.

Kneeling down, Lizzie held out her hand for the animal to sniff.  A soft smile graced her lips.  As the rabbit moved closer, a voice, clear as day, seemed to emit from it.  It was a little surprising, but the girl was so lonely that any companion was welcomed.  

Now sitting, her and the rabbit, his name was apparently Jack, talked all through the night.  It was only as the starting of dawn broke over the treetops that Lizzie remembered that she had snuck out and needed to get home before her parents noticed.  Saying goodbye to her new friend, she ran home with the first smile on her face in a long, long time.

~~~

The next night Lizzie went back to the forest to find Jack.  She wandered for hours but to no avail.  Disheartened, and wondering if she had dreamt him up, the girl returned home, curling under her blankets to cry.

As the tears began to wind down, a voice spoke up from within her room.  Throwing the blanket off of her head, Lizzie quietly called out “Jack,” with utmost adoration.  He was real.  He really was her friend.

Every night for two weeks, Jack would appear in her room, and they would talk and play.  Lizzie made sure to keep her voice down, so her parents wouldn’t come barging in.  For the first time in her life, Lizzie felt heard.  Felt loved.

They would talk about anything and everything.  About how the town’s children treated her, about how her parents ignored her.  Jack had an idea.  She should make them pay.  Teach them a lesson for being so mean.  That was a great idea!  Lizzie was willing to do anything Jack told her.  He was her first friend and she loved him with all her heart.

Following his instructions, Lizzie gathered all the energy inside of her.  Jack said she had a strong current of magic lying dormant in her blood, an untapped potential.  With all her focus, the little girl set her bedroom curtains on fire.  She grinned in glee; Jack was right.  She really could do amazing things.

~~~

The newspapers said it was a great disaster.  Some loose electrical wiring had sparked a fire, and in the crisp autumn air the blaze spread.  The little town didn’t stand a chance.  It was too small to have their own fire station.  No one survived, save for a little girl found wandering down the highway alone in her pajamas.  

After that night, Lizzie could not find Jack no matter how hard she tried.  She would sneak out of the orphanage she was stuck in and wander the forest all evening.  She would cry, scream, beg, but still Jack never returned.  She had lost her one and only friend, and she had no idea why.

Once she was old enough, the witch ran away, deciding to try life on her own. She would lie, steal, anything that meant she would survive.  When things got rough, she had her fire to protect her.  She kept away from others, not able to trust another human being. 

Scout Williams was one of the few people Lizzie came to trust and love after a lifetime of loneliness.  But when the two had a large fight, they went their separate ways much to the witch’s dismay.  Eventually she wound up in Faerune on a whim, not realizing that she knew of the city because it was her familiar’s hometown.  

Reuniting with Scout after a year was hard, but Lizzie couldn’t hold a grudge against the other.  Scout was one of the few people that made her feel loved and wanted, and she didn’t want that to go away again.

AND WHAT HAS BECOME OF YOU?

When Lizzie isn’t busy at the cemetery, helping Scout at her skate shop, or working on her magic, she spends a great deal of time at Duke’s.  Other than that Lizzie’s still as much of a wild card as ever.  She despises the new reign because she can’t stand being told what to do by people (with the exception of Geal).

[udo0stories]

There are so many fantastic day trips from Prague! Since moving to Prague a few years ago, I have spent a lot of time exploring the Czech Republic, including numerous day trips out of the city. There are so many stunning locations in the Czech Republic that are well worth seeing, but so many tourists only venture outside of Prague. What, then, are the top destinations in Prague to see during a day trip? My top recommendation is always the town of Kutná Hora, a pretty town home to an interesting church made of human bones, but on this list you have everything from natural wonders to interesting overlooked cities! Keep in mind that for an optimal day trip, I recommend a journey of two hours each way or less. You can go a bit beyond—like to Brno, Český Krumlov, or Olomouc—but I also think you should consider staying overnight if it’s a longer journey. Every trip on this list is either doable by train (often direct train), bus, or guided tour. (Planning a trip to Prague?)? Be sure to check out my favorite unusual things to do in Prague, the best Prague restaurants, and what NOT to do in Prague! This post was published in March 2024. Kutná Hora Kutná Hora is my personal pick for the best day trip from Prague. I always recommend it to Prague visitors because it’s a really pretty Bohemian town with a fascinating chapel built of bones; it’s a short, 50-minute journey from Prague; tickets are easy to buy; and tours are aplenty. The bone church—its real name is Sedlec Ossuary—is the main sight worth visiting. It’s creepy and fascinating while being an architectural marvel. (Know that photography is now allowed here.) But beyond the ossuary, the town of Kutná Hora is so underrated! It’s painted in beautiful Bohemian pastel colors, with lovely churches, cute restaurants, and flowers blooming everywhere. The perfect easy getaway that lets you see Bohemian life beyond Prague. Best things to do in Kutná Hora: Visit the bone church, of course! But also take time to stroll around the city center and grab a nice Czech lunch (I enjoyed the food and setting at Staročeská restaurace V Ruthardce). The Cathedral of St. Barbara is a spectacular gothic masterpiece, and don’t miss the Czech Museum of Silver and the Church of St. James. But Kutna Hora is a great place to get lost. Should you book a tour or go independently? I think Kutná Hora is pretty easy to do on your own via public transit, but if you’d rather have the ease of going with a tour guide, you can do that! Book a tour to Kutná Hora from Prague: This top-rated Kutná Hora tour from Prague includes round-trip transportation from your hotel in Prague, a tour of Kutná Hora town, and admission to Sedlec Ossuary. How to get to Kutná Hora from Prague independently: Head to Prague’s main train station, Hlavní nádraží (the station is abbreviated as Praha hl. n). Use the machines to buy a ticket to Kutná Hora Hl.n. The journey is 50 minutes direct; there are also trains that have a transfer in Kolín, which are closer to 90 minutes each way. From the station, it’s about a 15-minute walk to the bone church, then an additional 30-minute walk (or 15-minute walk-and-bus journey) to the city center. If you have a rental car, Kutná Hora is about an hour’s drive from Prague. Český Krumlov Český Krumlov is absolutely spectacular—a gorgeous medieval city in South Bohemia that looks plucked straight from a fairy tale, cliches be damned. The city is encircled by a river and topped with a castle overlooking the gorgeous town. Spending time in a small city like this makes a wonderful foil for the big city of Prague. Honestly, I urge people to stay overnight in Český Krumlov rather than do a day trip. Overnighting is so much better—the city is so peaceful and lovely when the day-trippers leave, plus you’ll have more time to explore, and it is a pretty far journey each way. But I understand that many travelers only have time for a day trip. If that’s all you have, that’s fine. Start your day early, end it late, and you’ll have a great time.

It’s one of the most popular day trips from Prague for a reason. The best things to do in Český Krumlov: Head up to the castle for a postcard-perfect photo of the town (and the light is best in the late afternoon). Hire a raft and go paddling along the Vltava River. Explore all the artsy little shops, and have a meal at a restaurant on the banks of the river. And head to Apoteka, one of my favorite bars in the Czech Republic—they are a cocktail bar with a menu of quirky craft cocktails. Try the popcorn sour! Should you book a tour or go independently? If you’re an experienced traveler, you’ll be comfortable getting yourself there by public transportation. But if you’d rather relax and have someone else handle all the logistics, taking the tour is a great idea, especially since it’s faster to drive to Krumlov than take public transportation. Book a tour to Český Krumlov from Prague: This top-rated Český Krumlov tour from Prague includes round-trip transportation via shuttle as well as a tour of Český Krumlov and some time to explore on your own. How to get to Český Krumlov from Prague independently: You can either take the train or the bus, but I recommend the bus because it’s direct and the bus station is much closer to town. (A few trains to Český Krumlov are direct, but most require a change in Ceské Budjevice, and the train station is about a 20-minute walk from the city center.) Buses to Český Krumlov leave from Na Knížecí, a bus station right by the Anděl metro stop in Prague. The bus takes just under three hours. If you have a rental car, Český Krumlov is about two hours and 15 minutes from Prague. Read More: Guide to Český Krumlov, Czech Republic Bohemian Switzerland is a spectacular day trip from Prague for nature lovers! Via Shutterstock. Bohemian Switzerland Despite its name, Bohemian Switzerland isn’t Switzerland at all—this is the name for a gorgeous natural region in the Czech Republic, right on the German border. (The German side is called Saxon Switzerland.) If you’re looking to escape Prague for the day to experience nature, Bohemian Switzerland National Park is home to the most awe-inspiring mountain views in the Czech Republic. Come here for dense forests, deep gorges, and fresh mountain air. The Tiské stěny—the Tisna Rocks—is a spectacular area with misty, high-piled rock formations and cliffs that served as a mystical backdrop in The Chronicles of Narnia movies. Bohemian Switzerland is a great spot to visit year-round, and tour operators adapt their trips to the current weather conditions. Make sure you wear good hiking shoes! The best things to do in Bohemian Switzerland: Hike three miles to Pravická Gate, the largest sandstone arch in Europe (pictured above). Take a boat through the gorges of the Kamenice River. Cross the German border to visit the Bastei Bridge and the spa town of Bad Schandau. And if you want to be independent, there are so many hiking trails! Czechs love to hike. Should you book a tour or go independently? I strongly recommend going on a tour, as it’s not easy to do with public transportation. Book a tour to Bohemian Switzerland from Prague: This top-rated Bohemian Switzerland day trip from Prague includes round-trip transportation from Prague and your choice of two options: you can either do a moderate hike to Pravická Gate or take a boat journey down the gorge. After, you’ll have lunch and a visit to the German side of the park to visit Bastei Bridge and Tiské stěny, the Tisna Rocks, before heading home. How to get to Bohemian Switzerland from Prague independently: Driving is your best option, as it’s much faster and easier. Bohemian Switzerland National Park is about one hour and 45 minutes from Prague. If not, take a train from Prague’s main train station, Praha hl.n., to the town of Děčín, and from there take a bus to the town of Hřensko. Get off at Hřensko-Pravická brána or Mezní, and from here you have a three-mile hike to the gate. Karlštejn Castle If you’d like to see more

of the Czech Republic besides Prague but don’t want to go too far or commit too much time, Karlštejn is an excellent day trip from Prague. This castle dates back to the 14th century, when King Karel IV ruled Bohemia. The castle is filled with works of art and history today, and the architecture is interesting. Tours of the castle leave continuously, and they always have tours in English. Should you book a tour or go independently? Karlštejn Castle is easy to get to by public transportation, but tours often add on a visit to another site, like the Koneprusy Caves. Book a tour to Karlstejn Castle from Prague: This group tour to Karlstejn Castle also includes a visit to the stalagmite- and stalactite-filled Koneprusy Caves, a visit to Big America Canyon, and lunch at a traditional Czech tavern. How to get to Karlštejn Castle from Prague independently: From the main train station in Prague, Praha hl.n., take the S7 train in the direction of Karlštejn. The journey is direct and takes about 41 minutes. This will drop you in the town of Karlštejn; from here, you can walk up to the castle. Plzeň is so pretty—and one of the best day trips from Prague! Via Nick N. A. on Shutterstock. Plzeň Are you a huge fan of Czech beer? You’ll be delighted with Plzeň (Pilsen). This town is home to the Pilsner Urquell brewery, and many Czechs and tourists have made the pilgrimage out to try the world’s best beer at its source. Not a beer drinker? You can still have fun in Plzeň if you want to, but you might have more fun in one of the aforementioned cities on this list. Even so, you can take in the best views of Plzeň from the Cathedral of St. Bartholomew or head underground to explore the tunnels that have been beneath the city for centuries! Should you book a tour or go independently? If you’re just visiting the brewery, just book yourself a train ticket—but if you want to add on glassblowing, I recommend booking a tour. Book a tour to Plzeň from Prague: This group tour from Prague to Plzen includes transportation from Prague, admission to the Pilsner Urquell Brewery, lunch in a Czech pub, and a visit to the Bohemia glassworks in Nizbor, which is a nice cultural way to supplement your day trip from Prague! How to get to Plzeň from Prague independently: From the main train station in Prague, Praha hl.n., book one of the many trains to Plzeň, and that journey takes about 90 minutes. Alternatively, you can book a Flixbus departing from the main bus station in Florenc, and that journey takes about 50 minutes. It’s hard not to fall in love with Karlovy Vary, one of the best Prague day trips! Karlovy Vary Karlovy Vary is one of the most elegant towns in the Czech Republic, made famous due to the rich geothermal waters surrounding the city. Karlovy Vary is a UNESCO World Heritage Site—one of the Great Spa Towns of Europe—and there are plenty of spas you can visit (my favorite is Hotel Thermal, with a warm outdoor pool you can enjoy year-round). In addition to the thermal springs, Karlovy Vary has nice hiking trails surrounding the town, the Moser Glass Works, good restaurants and shopping, beautiful arcades where you can sample all the spa waters with your signature cup, and they even put on a world-renowned film festival in the summer! My husband and I went to Karlovy Vary for a mini-moon right after we did our legal wedding in Prague. It couldn’t have been a better choice, though we had the benefit of enjoying a relaxed three-day visit rather than a quick day trip from Prague! I’d recommend staying overnight if you can, but a day trip is still worth it, too. Should you book a tour or go independently? It’s easy enough to get to Karlovy Vary by public transit; if you’re doing it on your own, I recommend going early and coming back late, as there’s so much to do. Book a tour to Karlovy Vary from Prague. This Karlovy Vary day trip from Prague includes transportation from Prague, a city tour, and four hours to explore on your own. How to get to Karlovy

Vary independently: There are both trains and buses running from Prague to Karlovy Vary, but there are a lot more buses than trains. Both buses and trains take about two hours each way. Tábor brings endless charm! Tábor If you’re looking for a nice little town that is more popular with Czechs than international visitors, I’m a big fan of Tábor. This pretty little town in South Bohemia is home to about 34,000 inhabitants—just big enough to find a bunch of things to do. In Tábor, you can wander the colorful streets of the town center; climb the tower of Kotnov Castle, with the best view of town; and for a delicious and unusual meal in the Czech Republic, the restaurant Rafariz dishes up sumptuous Uyghur-style noodle dishes. Another great option is to hike along the Lužnice River. There’s an easy trail along the river’s edge, and I really enjoyed this! Once you get to the town of Malšice, simply hop on the train back to Tábor. Should you book a tour or go independently? Independently, as it’s easy on public transportation and this is not a popular tour destination,. How to get to Tábor independently: There are plenty of trains from Prague to Tábor. From Prague’s main train station, you can expect a journey of an hour and 15 minutes on the local train, making it an easy day trip. Posázavská Stezka Czechs love getting out of the city on the weekends to hit the hiking trails. And while there are so many hiking day trips from Prague you can do by train, one I love to recommend is the Posásavska Stezka, located south of the city. This is a really nice hike along the river, with some moderate up-and-down segments. Altogether, you should expect 2.5–3 hours of hiking—and make time for a beer at the pub outside Petrov u Prahi station! Czechs pretty much hike to the pub; it’s what they do! If you do this hike on the earlier side, you’ll have plenty of time in the afternoon to spend in Prague. It’s more of a half-day trip than a full-day trip from Prague. Should you book a tour or go independently? Go independently. I don’t know of any tours doing this route. How to get to the Posásavska Stezka independently: Take the train from Prague’s main train station to Kamenny Přivoz station and take it back to Prague from Petrov u Prahi. Each way, it’s just under 90 minutes. Terezín Concentration Camp is one of the most moving day trips from Prague. Via Shutterstock. Terezín Not all day trips from Prague are about fun and games, and if you’re looking to understand one of the darkest chapters in Czech history, I recommend a visit to Terezín, a former concentration camp. Terezín (Theresienstadt Ghetto) is a camp where Jews from all over Europe were sent between 1941 and 1945. Terezín wasn’t explicitly an extermination camp, but it was designed to be a holding place before sending prisoners on to Auschwitz or Treblinka to be killed. Many died from illness, starvation, and poor living conditions. Around 150,000 Jews passed through here altogether; only 17,000 were saved after liberation. Creepily, this camp also served as a propaganda piece and was filled with flowers and pretty buildings, serving as a backdrop for what a nice place it would be for Jews to go. Should you book a tour or go independently? I strongly recommend booking a tour to Terezín from Prague. The sites are spread out all over the town, and it’s a much better experience if you have a local guide. Book a tour to Terezín from Prague: This top-rated Terezín tour includes transportation from Prague (including optional hotel pickup) and a guided three-hour historic tour of Terezín. It’s a half-day tour, so you’ll have most of your afternoon back in Prague. How to get to Terezín independently: To get to Terezín, head to Letňany station in Prague (not the main bus station) and get on Bus 413. Tell the driver you’re going to Terezín, pay for your ticket, and get off at the stop Terezín U Památniku. The small fortress is a short walk from the bus stop. From there, the other sites in town are up to a 15-minute walk away.

Liberec’s town square on a somewhat snowy winter day. Liberec One unusual day trip from Prague is to the town of Liberec (LEE-ber-ets), a city close to the German and Polish borders. In Liberec, you’ll find a pleasant small city with a wonderful collection of architecture, including an unusual Neo-Renaissance town hall! The best part of visiting Liberec is simply exploring the streets. While it isn’t a tourism powerhouse like Český Krumlov or even Brno, I find wandering around to be a worthwhile activity here. Don’t miss the villas behind the town hall, and there are some nice cafes tucked into the colorful streets of the old town. You could simply visit Liberec town, but for a treat, consider visiting Ještěd Tower, an unusual hotel and restaurant in a space ship-like shape with windows overlooking the natural beauty of the surrounding landscape. I loved visiting this place; the pumpkin soup was great, and it was a fun little excursion! Should you book a tour or go independently? Definitely go independently; I don’t think any tours from Prague exist. How to get to Liberec independently: To get to Liberec from Prague, head to Černý Most Station (the end of the B line) and take a bus to Liberec, which takes a little over an hour. If you want to get to Ještěd Tower, public transportation doesn’t go there; you’ll either need to drive from Prague or take a taxi from Liberec (about a 20-minute drive). Mariánské Lázně If you like the idea of Karlovy Vary but want to visit a spa town that’s a little more quiet, Mariánské Lázně makes a good choice for a (slightly far) day trip from Prague. Another of the UNESCO World Heritage-listed Spa Towns of Europe, Mariánské Lázně is a quiet, bucolic getaway where natural hot springs abound. If you’re spending a day here, you should make a reservation at the spa at the Hotel Nové Lazné, which has a gorgeous, elegant, Roman-style bathing area with multiple pools, along with saunas, steam rooms, and cold plunges. You can book spa treatments, too. That said, 2.5 hours each way is a bit long for a day trip, and you might get more out of your time if you overnight here (or visit Karlovy Vary, which is a bit closer). Should you book a tour or go independently? Go independently. I don’t know of any tours that exist. How to get to Mariánské Lázně from Prague independently: Take the train from Prague’s main train station to Mariánské Lázně. Trains run hourly, but every other hour it’s an indirect train that requires changing in Plzen. The journey is about 2.5 hours. From the station, I suggest hopping on the bus to the city center, as it’s a 30-minute uphill walk otherwise. If you time your visit right, Dresden’s Christmas markets are wonderful! Dresden, Germany Are you visiting Prague for the Christmas market season? I absolutely recommend taking a day trip to Dresden, Germany! (Just make sure that the markets are actually on — Christmas market season in Germany is shorter than Prague’s, usually running from December 1–23.) Dresden’s Striezelmarkt is one of the best in Germany, with several markets stretching across different neighborhoods. Come here for gluhwein, lebkuchen, and all kinds of tasty goodies (and be sure to read my guide to planning a German Christmas Market trip!). Is Dresden worth it if it’s not Christmas market season? Honestly, unless you have something specific you’ve wanted to visit in Dresden, I would choose somewhere else on this list. (I did really enjoy visiting the VW Golf factory, watching all the cars being manufactured!) Finally, if you’re intent on visiting Germany on a day trip from Prague, Dresden is your best bet—it’s close by with tons of transportation options. Nuremberg and Berlin are too far. Should you book a tour or go independently? Definitely go independently. Transportation couldn’t be easier. How to get to Dresden independently: You can either go by train or bus, and both ways take about two hours and 15 minutes, though buses are cheaper. You can take a

train directly from Prague’s main train station or a bus from Prague’s main bus station in Florenc. Brno The second-largest city in the Czech Republic is often overlooked by travelers, but Brno (BUR-no) has so much to offer. The largest city in the Moravia region of the eastern Czech Republic, Brno feels like a small, slightly shabbier version of Prague—but cheaper and a lot of fun, too! My absolute favorite thing to do in Brno is visit Villa Tugendaht, a really cool modern residence. If you’re interested in design or architecture in the least, you will love it! You should book tickets ahead. Other than that, be sure to check out the Brno Ossuary (bone church!), see the “Brno Dragon” in the town hall (it’s a crocodile!), and hit up the cool restaurants and bars in Brno (including my favorite, “The Bar that Doesn’t Exist,” an internationally lauded cocktail bar). Honestly, I think that Brno is better as an overnight destination. And if you’re traveling from Prague to Vienna or vice versa, it’s a nice place to stop in between. Should you book a tour or go independently? Go independently. Transportation is very easy. How to get to Brno independently: From Prague’s main train station, there are constant trains to Brno. Trains take about 2.5 hours. You can also find many buses along this route that take about the same amount of time. Olomouc Olomouc (o-lo-MOATS) is one of my favorite places in the Czech Republic, and you never see it mentioned on “best of” lists! Honestly, there aren’t a ton of things to do, but I think the city has a really great vibe and some nice restaurants and cafes. The city’s main square is home to the Holy Trinity Column, which itself is a UNESCO World Heritage Site. Additionally, there are lots of fountains, an astronomical clock similar to Prague’s, lots of churches and parks, and a few museums. Olomouc also makes its own signature cheese. Full disclosure: I love cheese, but this cheese is not my favorite, so I recommend trying a small plate and not ordering it for your main meal! Olomouc isn’t the kind of city you visit with a checklist; it’s more of a place to soak up the vibe. And considering that it takes 2–2.5 hours to get here, this is also a place where you might prefer staying overnight. Should you book a tour or go independently? Go independently. Transportation is easy, and this isn’t a popular tour destination. How to get to Olomouc independently: From Prague’s main train station, there are constant trains to Olomouc. If you want a treat, the Leo Express trains run this route and have a NICE business class. You can book those at leoexpress.com. Trains take 2–2.5 hours each way. There are also plenty of buses along this route.

[creeathelabel]

Summer Delight: How to Style Your Ruffle Playsuit

Introduction

Summer is a season of sunshine, blue skies, and an irresistible urge to revamp our wardrobes with fresh, breezy styles. There's no better way to welcome the warmth than by adorning yourself in playful and chic outfits. Among the stars of summer fashion, the ruffle playsuit shines bright. In this article, we will dive into the world of styling ruffle playsuits to perfection, ensuring you delight in the summer sun with a dash of elegance and whimsy.

Unveiling the Ruffle Playsuit

At the heart of our summer style adventure lies the enchanting ruffle playsuit. These delightful ensembles are defined by their signature ruffled details, which can adorn the neckline, sleeves, hem, or even cascade down the entire outfit. The ruffles breathe life into your look, infusing it with a touch of playfulness and femininity. Ruffle playsuits are a celebration of carefree days, and they bring a sense of youthful exuberance to your summer wardrobe. However, they do more than evoke nostalgia; they offer a modern interpretation of timeless fashion concepts, blending the charm of yesteryears with contemporary style.

Embracing the Versatility

One of the remarkable aspects of ruffle playsuits with ruffle mini skirt is their versatility. They seamlessly transition from daytime casual wear to evening elegance. For a relaxed day out in the sun, pair your ruffle playsuit with comfortable sandals, a floppy sun hat, and oversized sunglasses. This effortless combination exudes bohemian chic, perfect for beachside strolls or picnics in the park.

As the sun sets and the stars begin to twinkle, transform your daytime outfit into an evening delight. Swap out your sandals for elegant heels, add statement jewelry, and you're ready to paint the town red. It's a testament to the adaptability of ruffle playsuits—they embrace your mood and the occasion with equal grace.

The Ruffle Playsuit Trend

The fashion world has witnessed a surge in the popularity of ruffle playsuits, especially during the summer months. Influential celebrities and fashion influencers have eagerly embraced this trend, solidifying its status as a must-have item in every stylish summer wardrobe. This trend stands out for its inclusivity, appealing to individuals of all ages and backgrounds. It celebrates diversity and encourages everyone to experiment with playful and chic ensembles. From red carpets to street fashion, ruffle playsuits are making waves and capturing hearts. Also you can wear maxi skirt with split, this thing is super stylish thing if your don’t comfortable on ruffle playsuits.

Finding Your Perfect Ruffle Playsuit

Selecting the ideal ruffle playsuit involves a few considerations. First and foremost, pay attention to the fit. Your playsuit should fit comfortably and enhance your body shape. Some ruffle playsuits focus on specific areas, such as a ruffled neckline to highlight your collarbone or ruffled sleeves for an elegant touch. Color and pattern choices are equally important. Ruffle playsuits come in an array of colors and patterns, ranging from classic monochromes to vibrant florals and playful stripes. Your choice of color can set the tone for your summer style—bold hues make a statement, while softer tones exude timeless elegance. You can have a look at creea, they offer various collection of comfortable clothes. 

Color Splendor: Exploring Options

Summer fashion thrives on color, and ruffle playsuits are no exception. Explore the vivid spectrum of colors and patterns available in ruffle playsuits to find the ones that resonate with your summer spirit. Whether you're drawn to tropical prints, soothing pastels, or classic black and white, there's a ruffle playsuit waiting to become your summer staple. Your color choices can impact not only your look but also your mood. Bright and vibrant colors exude energy and joy, perfect for lively summer gatherings. On the other hand, softer and muted tones offer a sense of calm and elegance, ideal for romantic evenings by the seaside. Also if you want to go out for beach and want to enjoy the moments in water bikini top is perfect for you.

Embracing Comfort

Summer style should always prioritize comfort, and ruffle playsuits and maxi skirt deliver on this front. These outfits are typically crafted from lightweight and breathable materials, ensuring you stay cool in the summer heat. Fabrics like cotton or chiffon add to the comfort factor, allowing you to move freely and enjoy your summer adventures.

Ruffle Playsuits for Every Body

One of the remarkable aspects of ruffle playsuits and cross over crop top is their ability to flatter different body types. Whether you're petite, curvy, or have a unique body shape, there's a ruffle playsuit that can complement your figure beautifully. Consider the placement of ruffles to accentuate your strengths and create a balanced look that boosts your confidence.

Radiate Confidence in Your Style

Confidence is the ultimate accessory when it comes to styling ruffle playsuits. Wear your playsuit or crop top with pride, knowing that you're making a fashion statement that blends playfulness with chic elegance. Embrace your unique style, experiment with different accessories, and let your personality shine through your outfit. When you feel confident in what you wear, you'll radiate charm and captivate those around you.

Conclusion

In conclusion, ruffle playsuits are the epitome of summer delight. They effortlessly blend playfulness with chic style, making them a must-have addition to your summer wardrobe. As you embark on your summer adventures, don't hesitate to explore the world of ruffle playsuits, embracing their versatility, comfort, and flattering qualities. Whether you're basking in the sun or dancing under the stars, let your summer style bloom with the charm of ruffle playsuits.

[cyrasblogproject2022]

#6: Enid (Wednesday)

The newest Addams Family adaption in the form of Netflix's Wednesday introduces a school of outcasts. As I did for my previous blog installment on Loki, this analysis is fictitious. I wanted to look at Enid Sinclair, Wednesday's polar opposite roommate. Spoilers ahead for the first season of the show. The school they attend, Nevermore, the school that they attend, hosts all types of "outcasts" who are looked down upon by the rest of the town as minorities not to be trusted, such as sirens, vampires, gorgons, psychics, and more. Enid Sinclair comes from a family of werewolves, marking her as a representation of intersectionality since she is an outcast, more specifically a werewolf, and also a young woman.

Enid faces familial pressures due to being the only girl out of her siblings and being the only one in her family who has yet to "wolf out". "Wolfing out" is a process comparable to puberty for humans, in which werewolves experience their first transformation into full wolves. Up until the very end of the first season, the closest Enid gets to wolfing out is her nails growing into claws when she gets worked up, unlike her brothers who vary in age, yet have all had this experience already. I found it interesting that the writers chose the claws to be the only werewolf aspect that Enid has until later in the season. This choice could be analysed as highlighting her femininity in a family of wolves made up of only boys, seeing as her nails are painted in colorful pastels. During Parents' Weekend at Nevermore, Enid and her mother engage in conflict as she pesters her daughter on her attempts to "wolf out". The only thing her mother cares to talk about is if Enid feels she is close to wolfing out yet. Mrs. Sinclair even goes as far as to suggest summer camps that specialize in encouraging young werewolves to hurry up the process.

Although I have been discussing Enid's werewolf identity as a race, this scene in particular could be discussed as potentially relating to sexuality and conversion camps, seeing as Enid is portrayed as the "other" among her other siblings. That, as well as the fact that the actors of the show have teased a relationship between Enid and Wednesday. Because of this, Enid's mother's urge for her to be normal, in her terms of what normal should be, is not too far of a reach for potentially being a message on sexuality and homophobic parents. The show does do a great job of discussing tensions between mother and daughter, both with Enid and her mother as well as with Wednesday and Morticia. Enid's difficulty with her mother would likely not exist if she weren't a girl, and she is constantly being compared to the men in her life. Their quarrels are comparable to how difficult it is to be a young girl with pressures from her mother, whether it be about what she wears, eats, how she's performing in school or extracurriculars, if she is polite or ladylike enough, or, if she has wolfed out yet. When Enid does eventually wolf out, it is on her own terms, rather than her mother's.

Overall, Enid being both a werewolf and a girl led to her struggles in appeasing her mother's expectations and catching up to her brothers' position as wolves. The tension between her and her mother would not likely have been a plot point if Enid were have been a boy, and her girlhood makes her susceptible to her mother's criticism. Overall, I look forward to seeing Enid explore her strengths as both a young girl and now wolfed-out werewolf in the future seasons of Wednesday.

[ecoamerica]

Watch the American Climate Leadership Awards 2024 now: https://youtu.be/bWiW4Rp8vF0?feature=shared

The American Climate Leadership Awards 2024 broadcast recording is now available on ecoAmerica's YouTube channel for viewers to be inspired by active climate leaders. Watch to find out which finalist received the $50,000 grand prize! Hosted by Vanessa Hauc and featuring Bill McKibben and Katharine Hayhoe!

[captain-barnes-writes]

Addiction [2/2]

Summary: Lee Bodecker got one taste of her and couldn’t get enough.

Pairing: Lee Bodecker x reader

Warnings: Age gap, language, mentions of alcoholism, sexual content, some good ol’ BJ, unprotected sex (y’all better wrap it in real life tho bc this is fiction.) SMUT. 18+

Word Count: 5k [NOT PROOFREAD. Any comments, tips, suggestions are greatly appreciated. My Ask Box is always open.] 

Lee Bodecker found himself distracted at the sheriff’s department. His name would be called multiple times to get his attention, eyes strained towards the cream-colored wall with his plaques on it, mind elsewhere. His mind lingered on a particular girl who was driving him crazy. It was a Saturday and his girl was off work meaning he’d be unable to pick her up, unable to see her. In turn Boyd, her father, was her replacement at the store. He was a grouch of a man whose brown eyes always seemed to be half closed. He was slow in his speech, slightly slurred and harsh, as his body still ran under the effect of liquor. He was far worse than Lee in that aspect. Absolutely no self control. Lee thought how the old man should’ve been doing like he had, scouring the town for a different type of rush. One that, fortunately, he’d found in his daughter. One that wouldn’t slowly kill him, yet the old man had already completely succumbed to the liquor’s hold on him.

Boyd was a downright drunk who’d fallen down the slopes of greatness, down to the very bottom of grace, when his wife passed many years ago. He’d been a good man when she was alive, friendly and ever so kind. His store always tidy, shiny new fresh coat of paint every year because it was his pride and joy. He’d care after his customers, bagging their purchases attentively and even sparked up conversations with them whenever he could. Now the store was rundown, paint chipped and his service deplorable. His pretty girl was the only one keeping it afloat, maintaining the inside as best as she could with little to no help from her father.

Boyd’s shifts ran slow for him, snapping at customers with such impatience they didn’t even know why they kept coming back to his damn store. Though it came down to the town’s lack of services, Boyd’s store was at the center of town and the most convenient. But when Y/N was there, the beautiful girl with the usual pastel dresses and pale flats, it was a stark contrast to him. Her illuminating joy and youth was lively, smile large as she handed back change to customers, tending to them with utmost care. It was in her nature, her way of being that made her so delectable. She was the very life of that store, the only one worthy of it.

It was for that reason, that Lee felt himself drowning in his thoughts. Completely inundated not only with the events that had transpired on the back of his cruiser with Y/N, taking her virginity in a sweaty haste, but also of what her home life was like. He was unsure, but he deduced that it mustn’t have been great. His pretty girl had to deal with a drunk at home. God knows how he treated her. And it angered him so badly, the mystery of what went down in that household, inside those four walls. How he spoke to her, if he was kind, if he raised his voice at her. When his mind took the eloquent route of thinking that the drunk bastard could probably as well raise his hand to her, it angered him even more. It made his blood boil to realize that she most likely didn’t have a way out of the toxicity of that place, of the hold her father had on her. And probably of what she felt she owed him, utmost loyalty and company. She was his only daughter and if it wasn’t for her the man would be alone.

Lee didn’t know when he’d turned so damn soft. He’d never been that way, never thought he’d ever fall at the feet of a young girl. He never thought one taste of a girl would have him acting like this, heart beating frantically against his chest with one simple look of hers. He wanted nothing more than to please her, make her the happiest in the whole of Knockemstiff. Most of all he wanted her to be his. Not just physically, but even in the eyes of the law. Her belly swollen with his seed, growing, a part of them both inside her. Yet for the first time in his life he felt dumbfounded as to what steps to take to make that happen. He wanted to take her from his father, pluck her from his grasp.

He huffed to himself, thinking of how to make Boyd coward into giving him the one thing he wanted most. His daughter. Instead of tending to the pile of paperwork on his desk, Lee tried to draft out a plan on how to do so without hurting what he had worked so hard for the last months with Y/N. She seemed to share his affections—kissing him, holding his hand in the car as he drove her home. She’d opened up to him in ways he thought would never have been possible. She was his wildest fantasy come true.

When the clock read 7 PM, Lee placed his brown wide-brim hat back on his head, and stormed out of his office in a haste. He couldn’t think of a damn thing and he’d wasted too much time on absolutely nothing instead of tending to the pile of documents on his messy desk. He needed a cigarette badly, the nicotine of it to bring him some mild comfort. He grunted at the officers letting them know he was off for the day.

When Lee got inside his cruiser, taking off the heavy leather jacket off himself and throwing it on the backseat. It landed right where he’d taken his girl just a few days prior. Despite the sour mood he found himself with, a smirk appeared on his face at the thought of her.

His pretty girl had sucked his cock right at the front seat just the day before. That same abandoned lot only a few minutes out of town had already helped them create unforgettable memories. Stained his backseat with their arousal when he took her most cherished purity just a few days prior and the front seat with his hot cum only the night before. Her hands had been so gentle, inexperienced and soft. She’d wrapped those dainty fingers around his length, applying slight pressure as if afraid she’d hurt him. Grip it a bit tighter doll, Lee had instructed her. Her hands had tightened around him and began to move, the motion of her heavy breathing and movements of hands gaining groans from him.

It seemed as if she did everything he wanted, especially when he’d told her to spit on his shaft and she’d done so almost immediately. The line of saliva had connected with his sensitive head and it made her hands slide up and down a lot easier, a lot smoother. Her eyes were wide at the sight of the bulby head of his cock, covered in her spit and she thought it looked so delicious to taste when she dropped her head down to get a mere sample of him. Her actions had made Lee’s breath hitch at his throat, completely taken aback by her lips wrapped around him. Even her tongue was utterly soft, lapping at the head as if savoring him. Her lips had already been so swollen from his rough kisses and they slid down halfway and came back up again. Her mouth felt so warm to him, a new home for his throbbing dick. Suck it baby yeah just like that, Lee had panted above her. He couldn’t believe he didn’t have to urge her to taste him, she’d done so on her very own and it made his heart swell. He was corrupting her and only he knew what she could do with her hips, what her mouth tasted like and how silky her skin felt underneath his fingers. He felt so fortunate.

Y/N continued slowly licking the shaft, tongue lapping at him before her mouth continued to take him inside. Her hand had taken to stroking the base of him because she just couldn’t take him all. She was so new to it all, choking on him a few times and feeling completely desperate to try to please him as best as she could. Her mind had shifted from the task to thoughts of how the sheriff was already an older man, experienced beyond belief in all areas of his life. Especially that of intimacy and she barely knew a thing. He’d been with many women, at least according to all the gossip of the town, and she’d barely even kissed one boy. Hadn’t gone further with anybody but with the sheriff. It made her frantic to do her best with him, to show him that she could learn with him. That she could satisfy him just as much, and hopefully even more, than any other woman could.

Lee was loud, groaning and panting at the feel of her mouth. His hands had gravitated to the crown of her head, grabbing handfuls of her hair there to alleviate the immense commotion that was swirling inside him. Pooling wildly inside his stomach until he’d warned her that he was cumming, the hot liquid spurting from the tip of his shaft into her mouth. She was taken aback by the racking orgasm Lee had, some of his seed dripping on the side of her lips. Lee had coaxed her to swallow it and she had done so without having to be told twice. He was salty and warm, but she’d swallowed his seed whole so gracefully it made Lee pull her up by the hair and smash their lips together in complete amazement. His girl was too good.

Lee would have been lying if he said he didn’t want to bury himself inside her again the night before. Her virginal cunt had wrapped him in such warmth, her moans and sweet embrace had brought him an immense amount of comfort. He felt delirious with just her presence. He fought the urge to hitch her dress up and take her in his car again because he’d promised himself the next time he felt her walls engulf his cock, it would be in the comfort of his home. Yet he continued kissing her, teasing her until she’d moaned into his lips. He couldn’t shake off the hardness the whole night because being inside her, having his dick lapped in her juices, had been the commencement of an obsession. All his thoughts were her; and he knew. Knew that he wholeheartedly belonged to the young girl. Lee also came to the realization that he’d do absolutely anything for her.

-------

Lee drove to his home in Brewer Heights to the sound of the radio and the darkness of night. Years prior he’d made a promise to himself that if elected, he’d get himself a cushy place on the better side of town. When he won the election, he did just that. His yellow 3-bedroom home was far too big for just him but it also brought him a sense of satisfaction, a reminder that he’d achieved something far greater than himself. Yet it was still too large, too lonely. He was alone in the space of it every damn day and felt it suffocating him, the solitude of it encircling around his throat and closing in. It was for that reason he came to rely on the arduous taste of liquor, craving it as his thoughts got the best of him in the vastness of his house.

When Lee pulled up to his driveway, puffing on a cigarette, his eyes immediately made the figure of the girl he’d been thinking about all day standing on the steps of his home. The sight of her alone had his wheels skidding on a stop, engine off in a haste as he slammed the door to the cruiser shut. He immediately got rid of the half-smoked cigarette by throwing it on the cement floor and rushed to her wondering why she was there.

“Darlin’ what are you doing here?” Lee inquired. Despite being puzzled at her being there, he also felt his heart beating frantically in his chest at the mere sight of her. He drank her in as she gathered her thoughts. She wore a baby blue pleated skirt with a cream chiffon blouse tucked inside the waistline. Her face seemed saddened, eyes glassy and face flushed. It wasn’t until his eyes raked down her body that he noticed the brown suitcase at her feet and his forehead creased in confusion.

“Lee…” Y/N started, eyes peering up at the sheriff. “My d-daddy found out about us...He kicked me out the house. I’m sorry for showing up here, sheriff. I just--I just have nowhere to go.”

Lee’s jaw tightened at her words, hands fisting to his sides before they relaxed again at the way the young girl seemed so broken in front of him. Tears were cascading down her cheeks and bottom lip quivering. He took a step closer and pulled her into his strong arms. Her shuddering body came into contact with the fullness of his chest.

“Let’s get you inside first, yeah?” Lee muttered onto the top of her head, taking in the scent of vanilla.

She nodded, moving from his embrace to grasp her single suitcase when Lee bent down and took it from the floor. It wasn’t even heavy and he wondered if she’d even taken anything from her home, if she had the necessities to begin a life without her father. But something inside Lee leaped at the fact that her father finally knew that his daughter was with him. He was so taken with her that the rupture of the father-daughter relationship had him elated, completely and utterly pleased that their indiscretions were no longer so. That he didn’t have to take matters into his own hands anymore to get her away from the claws of her father, he’d done it all on his own. Pushed her away into his very arms.

Lee walked her into his home and her eyes scanned the rooms of it, noting that it didn’t provide a homey feel with it lacking wall art, pictures or even flowers. He urged her to sit on the couch and she did, hands clasped together on her lap. He sat next to her, one of his hands placed itself on her shoulder trying to comfort her in some way.

“Now, doll, what’d your father say?”

“Someone from town must’ve told him, Lee. Must’ve seen us or something. He came home today and he was…” She choked on her words. She closed her eyes tightly while taking a deep breath wanting to continue. “He was so horrible to me. Screamed at me, called me a whore and told me to never come back home. Not even to the store.”

“Did that bastard put his hands on you?” Lee pressed, voice grating as he awaited for her answer. God, he was going to make him pay if he even put on a finger on his sweet girl. She seemed so broken with eyes red from shedding too many tears.

“No. He just called me so many names...I can’t go back home now. I’m sorry I just showed up here without even calling you, I couldn’t think of anybody else who could help me.”

“I’m glad you decided to come here, doll.” Lee let out a breath he didn’t even know he was holding and felt a sense of satisfaction that Y/N had come to him out of all people. She confided in him, trusted him to some extent to care for her. It made him surge with utter bliss.

“You sure?” Doe eyes looking up at him. Despite her frail emotional state and tear-stained face, she still looked so alluring. He couldn’t believe she was in his house.

“Of course darlin’. I’m gon’ take real good care of you, you got that? You won’t be needing a thing here. I’ll give you everything you can ever need, doll.”

A tranquil tone had taken to her face at his words. His arms wrapped around her again, placed a kiss on top of her head and she leaned into his embrace. She didn’t know exactly what he meant or how their dynamic would be at the sudden turn of events that had them under the same household, yet she felt a gleaming hope become alight. As if in some sick way, being away from her alcoholic father was a relief to her. She'd dealt with his antics, losing money to gambling far too often, having to run the store on her own more and more as the years passed.

Her father was only a shell now, nothing of what he once was. He was no longer caring, no longer the hard-working man she’d admired. It felt as if her father had died with her mother all those years ago, he’d changed from one day to the next and left her to fend for herself. She realized she harbored so much resentment inside her, building up throughout the years for the man who’d failed to really properly care for her. To help her fully heal from the trauma of losing the most special person in her life, instead he’d added onto that wound. There was no better place for her than being with Lee now, being in his firm embrace. He clearly adored her, seemed as if he only breathed because of her and it might’ve been selfish but the need he had for her made her feel alive. It gave her some miniscule hope that things would be alright.

That night, Lee had shown her to his room. Seeing no need for her to take the guest bedroom when he’d already filled her sweet cunt just days before, he placed her suitcase in his room. She seemed so bashful stepping into his room, eyes grazing about it and the way it suited Lee so well with the green paint and the large bed that sat in the middle. A nightstand on both sides of the bed and large wooden dressers on the far wall. 

He had immediately emptied a few drawers for her even though he knew she hadn’t brought all her things just yet. He could break down Boyd’s door to get his girl’s belongings back if he wanted to, just to show him who had the upperhand in the situation. To rub it in his face that a man like him had fucked his daughter and she now resided in his home, was completely and utterly his. Yet the sheriff knew he couldn’t do that, not if he wanted to keep his position as the most powerful man in the town, to keep his hefty salary. Not if he wanted to spoil the living daylights out of his girl with roses and those soft-hued dresses she loved so much.

With the gleam of the moon oozing inside the space is his bedroom, Lee undressed her that warm night in a slow manner. His calloused hands delicately removed every article of her clothing and threw it on the floor of his bedroom. Her body met the sheets of his bed, cold against her skin. And he’d felt such pride at seeing the girl who’d clouded every single one of his thoughts for the last months sprawled on his bed. She was in his house, his bedroom. Completely at his disposal. God, he couldn’t wait to sink into her warmth.

He undressed himself in sheer urgency before he crawled up to her glistening pussy, she was already wet for him but he wanted to taste her. Wanted to savor the sweetness, become bathed in it. His lips met her folds, giving it a proper kiss before his tongue delved out and lapped at her. She did taste delicious, so much he felt crazed as his tongue continued its assault. He’d gone down on her to get a taste of her arousal, to get her wet and slick with his saliva for his cock. She was gasping for air, body squirming as Lee continued to lick and suck on her little nub, teasing her in the way only he knew how to.

She was completely helpless, succumbing to his experienced tongue. He was so good at it, bringing her to the brink in minutes. It wasn’t long before two of his fingers had replaced his lips and she’d yelped at the intrusion. He began easing them in and out of her pussy, the sounds of her arousal and moans loud inside the room. When he pulled away from her, he leaned down one last time to kiss her silky folds before he crawled up to be face to face. She seemed winded, face glowing with a thin sheen of sweat as he’d made a mess of her. She smiled shyly at him when she felt the heat of his gaze on her.

“You liked that, baby?” He leaned down to kiss her, already knowing the answer when her cheeks heated up within seconds. She was still too reluctant to voice how she felt, how he made her feel. His lips were still covered with her arousal and she tasted herself on him, feeling even more daring as she placed her hands on the back of his head to deepen their kiss. His cock was prodding at her entrance already, throbbing as if begging to be engulfed within her walls already. His soft belly was on top of hers, warm and heavy.

She scratched his back when he began to tease her entrance and had weaned his way inside her without much of a warning. Her tight cunt took inch by inch, his thickness already savoring the heat of it. Her pretty eyes had pooled with tears again, welling up around the edges. And his heart swelled at the sight. His hand had subconsciously met the side of her face in a gentle graze, tucking away a piece of unruly hair. He kissed her soft lips, traced them with his own in the most delicate manner he could muster before he began a rocking rhythm with his hips. She was broken before him, her moans echoing throughout the four walls of his room.

The wooden headboard of his bed collided with the walls of his bedroom, leaving dark marks on it as the thumping sound mixed with their moans and slapping skin resounded throughout it. He wasn’t giving her everything he could, her pussy still sensitive, still too inexperienced for a man like him to pound into her. She was still so innocent, irrevocably pure despite having given him her very essence. Despite having given herself to the sheriff, she still held those doe eyes with a type of purity that had him pining for her even more. She had him in the palm of her hands and she wasn’t even aware of it. All the chocolates, all the flowers and long conversations, those longing looks and pangs of desperation that felt like it was consuming him had been worth it because he was drowning in her.

“This pussy belongs to me right baby?” Lee questioned, hips still snapping against hers. Filling her up with his cock in a desperate manner knowing he was damn lucky to be fucking her, to have her writhing underneath him and moaning his name in a euphoric manner.

“Only you, sheriff.” She breathed, meaning it wholeheartedly. Her body was wracking in ecstasy at the intrusion of his shaft. He was rocking his hips against her harder than before and his lips were pressed against hers in a sloppy kiss.

Lee hitched her legs up, placing them on his broad shoulders. He felt deeper, if possible, and her eyes shut so tightly at the new position. It brought a new sensation for her. She was unbelievably loud, panting while gripping the bunched up sheets in her hands. His hand was clasped against both her legs, keeping them in place on his shoulder to fuck into her at a faster pace. He felt so desperate, the wild sensation bubbling inside him, he was chasing his orgasm already. But he wanted her to cream on his dick first, for her to come undone before him.

Still holding onto her legs with one of his hands, his other hand came down to her clit. He began rubbing it in circular motions, knowing she’d like it just like that. He watched as a string of strangled moans left her lips at the newly added stimulation, hands messing up the sheets even more with her grip. Within seconds her back was arching off the bed in spasms, pussy clamping his dick. The strong orgasm shattered her into a beautiful mess, crying out his name again and again. Lee thrusted frantically into her, his own orgasm catching up to him. His milky cum seeped inside her as he groaned loudly.

He collapsed next to her, breathing labored as he stared at the young girl who was breathing just as harshly at him. He leaned in to give her a small kiss, feeling utter bliss not only that he'd just came inside her but that she was laying beside him. And that she’d be doing the same for god knows how long. At that thought, he supposed it was a good time to bring up something that had been eating away at him.

“You know, people been talking ‘bout us darling. I don’t want them to get the wrong impression, can’t have that being the sheriff and all.” Lee began, fingers caressing the sides of her cheek. “How about we get hitched? What do you think ‘bout that?”

Y/N became pensive. Eyes widening and mouth falling shut seeing as no words were even connecting to her brain. Lee had come to hold her heart in such a short time. The brute of a man, with his scowling face and protruding belly, had leered her in. Yet one of the most obvious things about the pair had surely crossed her mind once or twice. She wasn’t dense about their heavy age difference. She was still colored in youth, skin soft and smooth with not a wrinkle in sight. Lee was close to being twenty years older than her. He also had his unhealthy habits of eating his weight in candy and with the way his breath always seemed to be ladened with the bitter smell of liquor it seemed as if he drank his weight in that too.

She noticed the stark similarities her father and Lee shared. The two most important men in her life, one who’d just filled her with disappointment and kicked her out of his life and the other who looked at her as if she was the only girl left on earth. They were men who relied on liquor to stop whatever it was that consumed their minds; the liquid the only thing that stopped their nightmares, their many languished thoughts.

“I told you I’m gon’ take real good care of you. Spoil the living hell out of you, baby. Just say yes.” Lee almost felt pathetic that he seemed to be begging her to agree. To say the definitive yes that would seal their fate together, that would see her as his even in the eyes of the law. He wanted that so badly, yearned for it. Hell, Lee thought, he’d even throw away the stash of liquor from his pantry. He’d rid himself of anything she didn’t like, do absolutely anything she wanted just to get her to agree. To get her to adore him just as much as he did her.

She came to understand that Lee was the only person in town, quite honestly the only man in the world, who really cared about her. He would drive her home even on his most tiring work days, take her out to different diners, coffee shops. He always gifted her with her favorite dark chocolates, blooming red roses and most importantly, with his undivided attention. That was one of the most important gifts of his, his utter adoration of her and the amount of effort he seemed to put into trying to impress her. In the way he tried to take care of her and protect her. It seemed as though he loved her already despite it not being that long since the beginning of it all. Lee would do anything for her and she found comfort in that. He’d wormed his way into her heart and she realized it as she felt his hands on her face.

Lee gripped the side of her jaw, azure eyes clouded with torment as he stared into her glossy ones. He was holding onto whatever word she’d utter, waiting for her to say it. To comply. He’d be so good to her, he promised himself, so good to her she’d never have to look the other way. That she’d never think about their age gap, or about the softness of his belly that seemed to grow with time or even the way his breath always seemed to be ladened with alcohol and cigarettes. He’d give it all up for her.

“Just say yes, doll.” Lee said again, voice rougher this time. The grip on her jaw a little tighter.

“Yes.” Y/N whispered, sealing her fate.

Someone like him with a girl who was almost half his age—he should’ve felt pathetic, embarrassed even. Yet he felt none of those things. Instead he felt high off of her, intensely enamored with her. He was intoxicated off her very presence. He’d gotten a taste of her already, wasn’t dreaming of it any longer. Didn’t have to make himself cum inside pepsi cups at mere thoughts of her anymore. She was tangled in his sheets and he’d made her his.

Tomorrow he’d make her his in the eyes of the law too.

I’m such a hoe for Lee 😫🥵 I’ve watched the devil all the time so many times already I should be ashamed lmao! And I already have another fic planned for him, I’m a fkin mess 🤭

I’m so happy you guys liked my first Lee one shot that I decided to write a second part! Hope you guys enjoy this one as well ✨

[First time doing a taglist so let me know if I missed you! ]

@jeremyrennerfanxxxx123 @iheartsebandchris @captainkitteh @gloriouspersonbanditrascal​ @sillygamingartghost​ @han-xe​ @awesomerextyphoon​ @princessofdarkwinter @kenzieam​ @lalaparker

[bonny-kookoo]

Good Girl [J.JK x Reader]🔞🌼

Pairing: Jungkook x Reader

Genre: Smut, Fluff, a lil angst

Warnings: dom/sub dynamics, dom!jungkook, sub!Reader, size kink, oral (f & m rec.), mild dd/lg themes, praise kink, cumplay, reader is a virgin, jungkook is lowkey a hoe, a lil heartbreak, Taehyung makes an appearance, long haired jungkook, mentions of harrassment, jungkook punches a guy, strength kink

Jeon Jungkook was known to have a specific type when it came to his partners; tall, gorgeous, dominant and older. It's not like he's a true blood baby boy; he's just too lazy to put any effort into his flings. When a new girl answers to his ad online searching for a roommate for his apartment to share rent and space however, he didn't quite expect such an innocent being to turn up at his doorstep with a box full of pastel colored belongings, ready to move in. And what he definitely didn't expect was his growing interest in her and the feeling of having her under him, all submissive and ready to be ruined.

Good Girl || Sweet Girl || Smart Girl || Brave Girl || Pretty Girl || Charming Girl || Enticing Girl || Bad Girl || ???

A wink was all he got from the woman who'd occupied his bed together with him last night as she walked out his bedroom door, seemingly knowing how to get out of his apartment. Jungkook ran his hand through his still sweaty hair, groaning after stretching his arms above his head, his mood seemingly sunkissed. He just finished an almost three hour sex-session after all; all without him providing any actual effort. His dick had seemed to be enough for her anyways, her face when she rode him happy, although he could really care less.

Reaching for his laptop near his bed, he didn't bother to put on any clothes for now, just wanting to check if he'd gotten any new E-Mails or messages, clicking through the casual nudes that constantly seemed to slip into his postbox. He cocked his head to the side however when he noticed that a website has notified him of an answer to his ad online; he'd put it up some time ago now after Taehyung, his former roommate, had to move out simply because Jungkook himself couldn't survive the older one's sleep shedule. Tae seemed to never sleep, waking the younger one up on a daily (and nightly) basis. He really tried to get along with him, both of them sharing a deep friendship, but god no, as a roommate he couldn't stand that guy. His rent however was something he struggled as well, so as much as he really wanted to live alone, he couldn't. He clicked the message on the website, his interest peaked.

"Hello. Is this AD still up to date? My name is Y/N, and I'm searching for a place because I'm starting to work close by soon, and its too expensive to take the bus for hours on end every day.. so uh, I don't know? I'm really good at cooking, and I promise I'll be so quiet and organized you won't even notice I'm there! I work at a restaurant nearby as a waitress- I mean, I'm going to, haha. Ugh, I hope you're okay sharing your apartment with a girl as well, I for my part don't have a problem with that! So, I guess, I'll wait for your reply?

Have a nice day!"

He scoffed a little, hovering over the delete button, but instead, he clicked her profile icon, opening the details. Her profile picture showed a white big dog, being hugged by what he assumed was her. He couldn't see her face however, half of her face above her nose cropped out to fit the entire dog instead. He could spot her clothes however; a top and skirt, flat shoes and sheer tights with white spots on them. His brows furrowed, how old was she? Her profile said she was about a year younger than him, every post she'd made up to this date about pet stuff, clothes who all seemed to follow a pastel-color scheme, and artwork you seemed to be selling. You were basically the definition of cute.

Fan-fucking-tastic. Hopefully you wouldn't be too upset when he denied your request, but somehow he thought it over. You said you could cook and you did seem like an organized person. Knowing what kind of effect he could have on people, he could probably scare the shit out of you and keep you around without really having to interact much; and rent was also due this month, so the sooner he found a roommate the better. "Fuck it." He said, and began to type his reply.

When his doorbell rang, he almost burned his hand with the hot water he currently used to make himself a cup of ramen, cursing loudly. Who the fuck wasn't home again so he had to take their package in? One day the old lady across the hall would find a dead rat or something in front of her door, he swore to himself. Ripping the door open with so much force he could feel a bit of wind gushing by, his eyes widened when he saw a similar face in front of him- well, a little below actually. He remembered your lips instantly for some awkward reason, having tried to maybe paint a picture of what you looked like entirely over the last few days. He would've never expected something like this however- you looked like a literal doll in his opinion, your eyes wide open and mouth a little parted, shiny lipgloss making him swallow. Wait, did he really forget that you said you wanted to move in today?!

"I uh.. I'm- I'm Y/N, we- I- the ad..?" You said, your voice sounding nothing like the woman he usually was around. He smirked a little, moving so you could step inside, food now definitely forgotten on the kitchen counter. He really should've at least cleaned up a little he thought. Whatever.

"Yeah, figured. There you go, thats your room. The keys and shit are on the matress, make sure you don't loose 'em." He simply said, before leaving you alone in your new home to settle down.

"What I'm trying to say is, Y/N, you and I, this could really be something!" Taehyung slurred into your ear, loud enough for Jungkook to hear. For some reason it pissed him off to no ends how close the older one seemed to be, constantly hitting on you like he was a starving man, even know half of town knew very well that he wasn't. He could see why; you were innocent, and Tae known to fool around a lot. You were a challenge, something new for him, and he would lie if he said that he wasn't interested as well. Oh he was; but he also had at least some manners left inside of him, contrary to popular belief not only thinking with his dick. Taehyung however was only out for fun, making Jungkook question if he should really let this continue.

He decided no.

"Alright you fucking whore, it's bedtime isn't it? I'll call you a cab." Taehyung groaned at the younger one's words, nodded his head however before looking at you with a smirk.

"Ah, what a shame. But if you wanna have some fun you know my number!" He said, as if he didn't just offer you sex. You blushed at this, not answering, making Jungkook watch you a bit. You really were something else. "Jungkookie, you're so nicee... If I was gay I would definitely suck your dick-" The younger in question made a disgusted yet amused face, putting a hand over the blue haired one's mouth.

"Yeah yeah, you pay me back though you fucker." He said, before going into the kitchen to make the call. Taehyung, being left alone with you again started with his questioning, as he had done the entire night.

"So, Y/N.." He said, dragging out the last syllable of your name playfully, making you shuffle around where you were sitting a bit. He certainly was a pretty attractive guy, but he also seemed to be very straightforward- something you always had struggled with, being more on the shy side. You looked at him, silently urging him to continue before taking a sip of your own beer- cherry flavored, simply because the regular was too bitter in your opinion. "What kind of toys do you use, heh?" He questioned, and you coughed suddenly. Taehyung laughed loudly at that, cooing when you calmed down slowly.

"Taehyung, stop harassing my roommate you fucking idiot. I need her to pay half of the rent-" He said, before sitting down next to you, raising one of his eyebrows at you. "And she also makes some killer lasagna. Kinda wanna keep that." He said, before laughing a bit. Even though Jungkook seemed to be pretty intimidating to you, he was actually a pretty good guy to have around. You both barely ever fought, and overall you could almost see yourself falling for him too- he had the looks after all. But his habit of bringing people over just to satisfy himself was something that made you keep some distance between you both. He wasn't someone to settle down- let alone with someone like you. You were pretty much the exact opposite of what he seemed to like.

Sending Tae home was easier than you both thought. Not being able to go to bed you both decided to watch some late night shows while casually talking- something that wasn't uncommon between you two. Just when you seemed to have gotten comfortable again, Jungkook couldn't help but tease you again.

"So, what Toys do you use, heh?" He said, laughing with his head thrown back afterwards at your red face. This would certainly never get old in his opinion. Just as he was about to apologize and tell you you didn't have to answer, your voice was heard, however.

"None." You said, and his eyes widened at that. "What? Do I look like I do these things to you?" You asked, and he cocked his head to the side a bit, scanning you obviously. He shrugged, and you began to pout, moving to wrap your pastel pink blanket around yourself. "I don't even know how to buy one. That stuff is just.. don't know. Gross." You said, and Jungkook turned on the couch, body facing you now, his interest sparked.

"Gross? So you never had sex before?" He said, and you went silent. Were you serious right now? You were an angel in his eyes, body proportions almost perfect, hell, even your slight imperfections were adorable in his eyes. Up until now he had been sure that you at least have had your fair share of experience, but a virgin? His world was suddenly turned upside down. "Well.. that's something I didn't expect." He said, making you raise your eyebrows at him. "You're hot. Thats why. Oh well." He said, missing the way your eyes widened at that. "I'm gonna go to bed now. Goodnight." He simply said, and you answered with a short 'goodnight' as well- still a bit surprised by his statement. Jungkook thought.. you were attractive?

He'd somehow gotten used to you, how you would leave your pastel pink but admittedly really soft blanket in a pile on one edge of the couch in the living room, how you sometimes left your toothbrush in the sink when you'd been in a hurry, or how you would hum to a song, not knowing he could hear you very clearly. Maybe he really did go soft after living with you for a while. He still didn't know himself why he got so upset with Taehyung the day prior; was he really being selfish? He was protecting you, nothing more. Taehyung was everything but a gentle lover, jungkook just knew he'd break you for sure, not to mention that you already stated how much you despised one night stands, which were practically Taehyungs speciality. He was just looking after you, nothing more.

The more he thought about it however, the more problematic the entire plan became.

But even now, while the young woman whose name he had already forgotten was giving it her all sucking his dick, all that seemed to swim around in his head were the events of the previous evening; how innocent and embarrassed you looked at him when you told him you'd never bought, let alone use a toy before. Surely you'd be someone to enjoy a good vibrator he thought, maybe as a gag he could buy you one? Oh how enchanting you'd look, spread out on his mattress while he would edge you over and over until you'd be crying, begging for his mercy. He would praise you for taking it so well, for being so good for him and only him, and he just knew you would blush. Instead of rushing to his own satisfaction, he would go slow, agonizingly slow, just to see how far he could push you. He would feast on you like a predator on his prey, pull you close so you had no chance of escaping him, he would trace every curve of your skin, gently, as if to make up for the bruises and Mark's he would surely leave all over you to feed his inner need to claim you, even though he would never let anyone see you like this while he was alive and breathing anyways. He just knew you would fit perfectly underneath him, his body covering you and shielding you away from the world around. Would you be able to take all of him? He probably would have to stretch you real good before even thinking about pushing his dick inside you, yet he just knows you would somehow make him proud and take it all, and he would continue his praises, telling you what a good girl you are.

He almost laughed at the situation, he really was in deep, wasn't he? Frustrated and confused he started to picture someone else entirely kneeled between his legs on the floor, how you'd bat your eyelashes at him like the fucking angel you were instead of the girl currently there, and that thought alone gave him the final push to shoot his load down the strangers throat, who moaned obscenely at the feeling. Usually he would be aroused, ready for more, but the sound of someone who wasn't his little roommate ripped him out of his daydream. This couldn't go on like that. Sending the lady out without many words, he decided that he just needed to fuck you, and all would be good again. He was just curious. Nothing else. He just needed to satiate his hunger and he could go back to normal.

How would he be able to do this without ending up hurting you? No matter how big his hunger for you was, he also considered you somewhat of a friend. He remembered when you came home crying one time after a bad day at work, and how he wanted to hold you, shielding you from any harm, making you feel safe. Because that's what he, and only he could do in his opinion. No matter what, he'd protect you, as weird as that sounded. Shit.

He really had a crush on you.

Unknowing to him you always held your hands over your ears whenever he brought home a different girl, not being able to listen to his moans mixed with someone else's. You were slowly beginning to regret moving in, already starting to think about maybe searching for a different apartment. But the rent was cheap, your room big, and his company relaxing when he wasn't busy being buried in someone he couldn't even remember after a day or two. Somehow tears were leaking out of your eyes, and you took your hands down from the sides of your head to wipe them away, careful to be as silent as possible as to not alert him that you were awake, well aware of the shower turning on. You did notice however how his sessions became shorter and shorter, always seeming to end sudden instead of usual. But the more you thought of it, the more angry at yourself for falling for this manwhore you became. You really should hate him- but you couldn't.

Tonight was definetely the prime example of why you didn't go into clubs. The sheer amount of people around you, the smell of sweat and cheap cologne and perfume all around made you feel like a headache was inevitable. Why were you here again? Oh yes. You followed Taehyungs advice and 'tried to make friends' instad of looming around your apartment all day. But right now you just really wished you stayed home instead of going here.

Sure, you liked your coworkers, and they seemed nice and everything, but if you were being honest, they're definition of fun was entirely not yours. You began to feel cramped up in the large club, making you desperately pull your phone out of your pocket, texting Jungkook in hopes he could save you from this god forsaken torment they called a club.

  Minutes later, after Jungkook oh so gentlemanly told you to pick you up, you stood in front of that said location, waiting for his cheap but admittedly nice car to pull up. Sadly, someone else seemed to be way more intent on bringing you home- a young man your age, attractive, yes, but also heavily intoxicated. He had already eyed you up inside the building you noticed, yet hadn't made a move towards you. Now however, he seemed more determined than ever.

"Lets go home baby, I swear you won't regret-" He started, but you moved away from him, clenching onto your little handbag in order to at least keep your belongings safe if he tried anything else. Suddenly both your figures were drowned in the warm light of Jungkook's car lights- you immediately recognized them simply by the fact that one was brighter than the other, something you always told him, yet he always waved you off, telling you that both were doing just fine, even though his left light was clearly almost dead. Typical him, you thought. Yet right now, you couldn't be happier to see him.

He however, did not seem happy at all. His face was serious, his wavy hair hanging a little over his eyes, steps fast and strong enough that you could hear his black boots almost crush the slight gravel of the parking lot. "Fuck off sunnyboy and go back inside." He simply yelled out, having already seen how uncomfortable you were with the stranger so close to you. Jungkook wasn't someone to blindly punch someone, that said however, he couldn't contain himself once he saw the guy reaching out for your arm, your figure instinctively scrambling to get behind Jungkooks way larger body. He didn't even notice his fist connecting with the strangers face, simply leading you by the small of your back inside his car, driving home without any more words.

You were not to be touched by someone so dirty like this young man who didn't even knew his own limits it seemed.

Yet you were completely confused now. Maybe, if you were now the reason he got into physical fights, you should make a decision.

The next morning, sitting down at the kitchen table, you watched Jungkook filling your bowl with cereal as well- lucky charms for you, and chocolate chips for him. It became somewhat of a routine since you both woke up roughly around the same time, sharing breakfast was common. The best moment in your opinion to pop the bomb.

"I'm moving out." You said softly, fiddling with your fingers in your lap, leg nervously bouncing up and down. Why did this feel like you were breaking up with him? You both would've ended up going separate ways sooner or later anyways- so he would probably just nod, ask when, and that would be it. He was someone who didn't bother much. But the second you said it, he turned around completely shocked, suddenly very much awake.

"Why? Did I do something?" He asked, sounding genuinely offended for some reason you couldn't come up with. In his mind, scenario over scenario started to play, as if he wanted to search for something he may have said or done to make you so upset that you didn't want to live with him anymore. He knew he shouldn't be so upset over it, since you and him were merely roommates, friends who shared an apartment, nothing more, but he never really expected you to come up with it so sudden. Or maybe you had a boyfriend? What if it was Taehyung, and you just didn't tell him? He would rip that fucker's stupid blue hair out, he knew-

"No. I- not reall-" You sighed, setting your elbows on the kitchen table before letting your head fall into your hands. "Actually yes, you did." You started, looking at him, but unable to hold eye contact with the now completely confused curly haired boy in front of you. "You.. uh.. I cant sleep. Your, 'guests', the walls aren't really soundproof and like, I really- and just.. ugh this is so awkward, please don't make me say it-" You said, groaning the rest of your sentence before stubbornly shoving your back against the chair, throwing your legs back and forth viciously, reminding Jungkook of a kid who was close to throwing a tantrum. Even though this was definitely not the time to think about you laid out over his leg, his hand hitting your perfectly shaped butt until it was red just to punish you for being such a brat, exactly this picture began to form in the back of his head. He hated himself somehow, really. But somehow instead of accepting your decision, he moved to stand at the table, hands on top of it, eyes searching yours.

"Say it Y/N. You know I hate when I have to pull thing out your throat sweetheart." He didn't intend on using the nickname, but somehow he threw his hesitation out the window. If you really were fooling around with someone, someone who wasn't him he wanted to know- and even if you didn't share that information with him, you would move out anyways, so why hold back anymore? You shook your head at him, avoiding his gaze, and he clicked his tongue, patience slowly thinning out. "Spit it out." He said again, but he still got no reaction. His hand seemed to move without his consent when he suddenly found his fingers on your chin, moving your head to force your attention towards him. "Speak the fuck up, I swear to god." He said, voice dropping down lower, and somehow you seemed as if bewitched.

Maybe it was the way he stood there, how he still held your chin, or how intensely he looked at you, but words dropped out of your mouth as if you drank harry potters truth potion. "I cant stand that you let these girls touch you, that they can get you so easily and you just look past me a- and I really tried you know, because Taehyung said you liked mature girls more so I tried to do that, but he lied to me, you don't notice me at all, you're so mean you-" He shut your mouth with his mouth, trying to process the information he just received, yet it seemed like it was too much at once. You were.. jealous? And what kind of stupid advice was Taehyung giving away, that fucker? It was true that he liked his women to be confident and mature, but that was just so they knew what they were doing, and he didn't need to put so much effort into something he could get so easily.

"So you were jealous?" He said, a small smirk creeping up on him, cooing at you internally when you shook your head, face red. "If you wanted me to fuck you, you could've just asked. Geez." He said, but instead of being relieved, your shoulders sagged down. "What?" He asked, and you mumbled to him.

"Because I don't want just that one time stuff you do." Jungkook looked at you, eyes softening at your somehow-confession. He just put together the pieces in his head, and it did make sense. You were practically attached to him wherever he took you, always seemingly glowing whenever his attention was on you. He was as much as a dense head than you were, and he couldn't help but pull out a chair and sitting down, patting his legs as an invitation.

"Good, because I don't want that either. And I don't share either." He said, and looked at you gently, but with a deep darkness behind his eyes. "Trust me baby, you can sit down now and I promise you'll be the only one to have me- or you can move out and go on with your life." He almost laughed at the way it suddenly clicked in your head on what he was offering, suddenly jumping up and sitting on his thighs, legs on either side of his body. He looked down at you, a divine picture coming to life. His hands were placed on the exposed skin under your skirt, slowly sliding over the soft skin until his fingers felt the seam of your tights- those goddamn things he'd wanted to rip off of you so badly these past days. "You can touch me, you know?" He said lowly, and you noticed how awkward you must've looked for a second, seated on his lap with your hands in front of you, unsure where to put them. Just to ground yourself, your fingers began to play with his shirt, and he had to swallow the laugh that wanted to break free. "You don't have to do this, you know? I'm fine with waiting-" He began, but you immediately shook your head, however, at loss for words. He smiled again, dangerously so you noticed. His head dipped down, finally touching your skin on your neck with his lips, leaving open mouthed kisses under your earlobe down to the crook, hands moving over your clothes already mapping out your body in his mind, one hand pulling down one side of your soft fleece jacket you wore, pulling down your shirt as well, so he could softly nip at your shoulder, making you gasp oh so cutely at his actions. His hands didn't stop however, moving over your chest, kneading both of your breasts softly, as if he would hurt you if he used too much strength- which was probably the case. He already loved how bis his hands looked running over your body, how your hands held his shirt in fists, eyes closed, yet not because of fear; you looked serene to him, face showing him the soft pleasure you felt. He suddenly moved you a little, making you straddle one of his leg, core pushed against his thigh. "Let's start slow, yeah?" He asked, whispering words into your ear, lips never parting from you. He slowly began to move your hips, urging you to simply follow what you thought felt best to you. "Use me baby. Get off on my thigh." You whined at that, slowly starting to move more and more boldly, and he decided that he was officially a goner. Even if you didn't want him after whatever may be happening, he knew he could never go back. The way you squeezed your eyes shut every now and then, moving back and forth yet always a bit helpless, showing how inexperienced you were. He could feel the wet patch forming on his jeans, his hands moving you a bit faster, before you let your head fall onto his shoulder, making him chuckle. "What is it baby? Do you need help, hm?" He said, a bit mockingly even, and you nodded into his shoulder. "Tell me what you need then. What do you want, princess?" He said, running his hands over your back, feeling your bodyheat through your clothes.

"wanna get the same.. as the others.." You mumbled, unsure what you were even asking for. Jungkook however simply smiled, suddenly lifting you up, hands under your behind carrying you to his room, before finally letting you fall onto his mattress, laughing when your body jumped a little, making you squeak so cutely. He smiled, crawling over you, his fantasy finally coming to life- you looked so lost under him, so utterly defenseless he could swear he could feel something primal awake inside him- and that was not his dick, which already strained against his jeans, impatient.

"Ah but Baby.." He began, taking off your soft jacket before his hands traced your bare arms until he moved them under your shirt, feeling your skin underneath his fingers. "You're my special girl.." He began to lift your shirt up, helping you out of it before he got rid of your skirt as well, chuckling at your cute lacey underwear, which was so typically you. So innocent, yet so arousing, how you squirmed underneath him in nothing but those pastel colored undergarments. "And special girls get special treatments.." His words were low, soft spoken yet with a rough edge to his tone, a natural feature of his voice that you've come to love. You couldn't even begin to paint out a picture of what he was talking about- sure, you have seen your fair share of adult films, you weren't a kid after all- but up until this moment, up until you met Jungkook, you've never really thought about what you could like when it came to these things. Even in your thoughts you felt shy saying any profanities out loud, how could you expect to know about kinks? "But only if you can behave for me, but you can do that right?" He said, unhooking your bra behind your back with ease and interrupting your inner talk with yourself. "You'll be my good girl, yeah?" He said, and you just viciously nodded, already growing frustrated, and oh how he loved it. This was how he had pictured you. If he had known before that this was what it felt like to have control over someone, he would've never done anything else if he was honest; but then again, you really were a special girl to him. The way you suddenly mewled when his hand cupped your heat, giving you a little pressure just to tease you even further almost caught him off guard. God have mercy on his soul, you were so sensitive to him, and it dawned on him again that he was making you this way. He was the first to- and he would make sure he'd be the only one as well. All those noises tumbling out of between your lips were only his to hear. His breathing peaked up at the view he had, how you began to impatiently rut into his hand, needy for more than he was giving you. He leaned back, finally getting rid of his own clothes as well to your satisfaction, lazily throwing his opened flannel as well as his white shirt somewhere on the floor in his room, and you couldn't help but stare. Truth be told, you didn't really know what to expect of him if you were honest, his constant gym visits giving you the impression that he had to be extremely fit, yet his habit of consuming more than two cups of ramen easily spoke differently. He was, in your eyes, the perfect in-between- he definetely was fit, his abs visible to your eyes, yet he didn't look like those over-achievers you sometimes saw walking around the same gym whenever you met him there to go home together. The way his muscles flexed at every move when he loomed over you again made you want to touch him, yet your shy side forbade you. He chuckled again. "You can touch what's yours all you want, you know?" He said, before he began to place his hand back onto your chest, his breath hot on your collarbone where he placed his kisses again, already hooked on your taste. His other, tattooed hand found its way back to your core, feeling the dampness there with amusement. You were more than what he'd imagined. Slowly he got rid of that barrier however, leaving your tights on for his own pleasure and maybe also for the aesthetic of it, his digits circling around your sensitive bud, making you squeal again, putting your hands over your mouth to keep your voice down. He clicked his tongue at this, moving them to lay right under the small of your back. "Be good and keep them there, yeah?" He said, and you looked away.

"But its- thats emb-" You couldn't even finish the beginning of your rant before he went back to his task at hand, sitting back before moving your legs to spread obscenely over his thighs simply to catch a glimpse of your glistening center, before he placed his body over yours again, hand now roughly circling in delicious eights around your clit, making you gasp out.

"Nothing you do is embarrassing, you hear me. If anything its fucking hot how you can be so fucking adorable even with my hand between your legs, doll." He said, before dipping a finger into you, making you move a bit at the foreign feeling. "Gotta stretch you out babygirl.." He said lowly, careful not to get too fast. His second finger joined in, and he could feel how tight you were around them, already clenching a bit as well, making his mouth water, but also growing a bit of worry in the back of his mind. Usually he was quite cocky about his overly average qualities down in his pants, but now he was genuinely concerned to hurt you with it. This was definitely a first for him. "Baby you're so small.. I don't think you can take it.." He said, a bit of a teasing undertone to his words as well. "See? You're already squeezing my fingers so hard princess, how could my dick ever fit inside huh?" He said, contrary to his otherwise rough nature keeping his movements gentle and slow enough for you to adjust without causing much pain. He could see the slight discomfort in your eyes, yet you suddenly shook your head, voice whiny.

"Uh-uh.." You mumbled, and he laughed a bit at that. "can take it.." You said bratty as ever, feeding his ego to no ends. "Wanna have it- you.. you gon' give it right? 'm good.." You said, having troubles keeping your hands under your back just like he told you to, grabbing the sheets underneath you instead to have something to keep yourself grounded.

Jungkook couldn't stop smiling. You didn't even know what you were asking for, yet you seemed so drowned in trust with him, that you simply gave him the right to do anything he wanted with you. "You sure?" He said, and smiled at the way you nodded again with your eyes closed. He moved away after that, shedding his pants before he walked over to his bedside table, fishing out a condom, before moving back to you, your eyes now on him, or more than that, on his very apparent bulge his boxers failed to conceal. Maybe you really did ask for more than you could take. Quite literally. Sensing your growing uneasiness he simply discarded his underwear, cock finally springing free, slapping soundlessly against his abdomen before he sat between your legs again. You made grabby hands for the foil package in his hands, somehow wanting to slip it onto him, yet he shook his head amused. "Nuh-uh baby. I'm afraid if you touch me right now I'll just embarrass myself and come straight away." He said, and you giggled at that. The sound of it brought him back at ease, his little joke having helped to calm you down at least a little bit. He knew this was a big thing, especially for someone like you- and it made him feel even a bit pressured if he was honest. He was slow when he dipped his head inside, your body instinctively trying to move away a bit, but you forced yourself to stay still, eyes now pressed close. Moving around a bit he kept one hand around the base of himself, the other steadying himself next to your shoulder, kissing you on your lips for the first time since you both started, surprising you enough to not notice how he somehow began to glide into you with the help of your arousal and the lubricant of the condom around him. He groaned, the first actual noise he'd made you could tie to his pleasure, and your breathing picked up once you noticed how full you felt. Gasping several times he suddenly started to laugh, making you giggle as well, even though you didn't knew what was so funny in that situation. "God- ugh.. your- fuck you're tight.." He pressed out, fighting hard against his hips' own mind yelling at him to move, to wreck you, to utterly ruin you. But he couldn't allow himself to do that- reassuring himself that he would have time for that at a later date. He slowly started to move around after he calmed down enough, keeping his speed down to keep it gentle for you. "I- fuck.." He started, having to talk to stretch his patience out, and to also ease your mild pain a little bit. "Let's- ugh.. Let's go on a date tomorrow, yeah? I.. god-" He said, and you nodded, moaning in your delicate pitch he oh so loved. "Gonna be all romantic and shit- fuck- gonna treat you like- for Mcdonald's or some shit." He said, making you both laugh between gasps of pleasure, your hands suddenly frantically moving around the sheets, legs shaking as he began to speed up his pace. You didn't knew what an orgasm would feel like, or how you knew you would have one, but you gasped, chocking on unshed tears in frustration as you noticed that you couldn't tumble over that delicious edge, and Jungkook noticed, cooing at you. "Ah, my baby can't come without her little clit being touched?" He said, kissing the side of your neck, biting the skin teasingly before sucking a hickey on your collarbone, his hands now grabbing yours, fingers intertwining with his, before moving them around his neck, sensing how you wanted to be closer to him, even though that hardly seemed possible. "Come for me baby, you can do it." He said, kissing your shoulder as if to make up for his mark he'd left, his hand now reaching between your bodies, only needing to put a bit of pressure on your little nub to send you flying. You moaned out loud, uncaring on how you sounded, clinging onto him for dear life, his own release making him groan out as well.

He could feel your body trembling, your breathing still fast. He waited for a moment or two for himself to soften up so he could pull out gently- your still slightly clenching hole almost pushing his dick out of yourself. You whined at the empty feeling, and he hushed you gently, moving around so he was sitting up against his headboard, your body on his lap, head on his shoulder. His hand moved back and forth over your spine, the other keeping your body steadily against him. "You did so, so good baby." He gently whispered between your breaths still coming out a little faster than they should. "To be honest I actually was kind of worried you wouldn't be able to take it. I'm impressed princess." He said, making you giggle. You still weren't quite back yet, still bathing in your own afterglow, and he simply waited for you to calm down- slowly becoming aware of your surroundings again.

"Hey, Jungkookie.." You started with that nickname Taehyung always teased him with, yet you would get away with it anytime on his watch. He simply moved his head to look at you, even if you weren't at him. "Did you.. like, mean it? Are we.. a couple now, or?" You started a bit too softly, yet you didn't have to be scared of his answer to that.

He took a deep breath, before yawning a bit. "If you want us to be. I know I want to." He started, brushing some hair away from your eyes. You looked at him, big eyes so innocent like he didn't just fuck you into his mattress literally minutes ago.

"I want to!" You immediately said, making him chuckle and place a kiss on your nose, receiving a giggle at that, before you tensed up. He raised his eyebrows at that, before you looked at him surprised. "My legs are all- tingly.. Jungkook did you break me- HEY don't laugh!" You said, but he couldn't help himself.

He threw his head back, laughing his admittedly cute open laugh, before wrapping his arms around your body. "God I love you." He simply said, making you smile.

"Hey Jungkookie?" You said after a bit.

"Yeah Princess?" He answered.

"That McDonald's date still stands, right?" You said with a small voice, making him snort.

"Anything you want princess. Anything you want."

Taglist:

@mrcleanheichou @sugasbratz @sassysaxsolo @bananagukkie @wh3resangel @urmomgee

[citylightsbooks]

A Women’s History of City Lights: Interview with Nancy J. Peters

We'll be celebrating Lawrence Ferlinghetti’s 102nd birthday on March 24, and what better way to remember his legacy AND to mark Women’s History Month, than to honor Nancy J. Peters, Lawrence’s business partner, friend, and longtime comrade at City Lights Books. While Ferlinghetti certainly deserves all of the accolades he’s received, the fact of the matter is there would literally be no City Lights without Nancy Peters. Beyond shepherding City Lights through various fiscal crises and providing the steady anchor that allowed Ferlinghetti to travel the world as a poet and activist, Nancy's vision as an editor and acumen as a publisher were a vital key to the success and longevity of City Lights Publishers.

 ***

City Lights: How did you come to know what City Lights was? How did you meet Lawrence Ferlinghetti?

Nancy Peters: In Greece in the early 1960s, I became friends with Nanos Valaoritis and Marie Wilson who were at the center of an international bohemian/surrealist community. They had a large home which was always full of traveling writers and artists whom they made welcome. The Beat writers were among their guests, and City Lights was frequently talked about as a place everyone would meet up someday. I met Philip Lamantia there and in 1965 he introduced me to Lawrence in Paris at one of Jean-Jacque Lebel’s anarcho-surrealist festivals of free expression.  Before a riotous crowd Lawrence gave a show-stopping rendition of his “Lord’s Prayer.” I was impressed by his powerful stage presence. Later that year, when Philip and I were living in Andalusia, Lawrence wrote Philip, asking for a selection of poems for a Pocket Poets Series volume. We corresponded some while we were putting the book together, but I didn’t see him again until 1971 when I moved to San Francisco.

I’d been working as an executive-trainee librarian at the Library of Congress in the fall of 1968. In April, Martin Luther King was assassinated and the impassioned protests that ensued left Washington neighborhoods in ruins. There was shockingly little assistance to residents from the government and my part of the city was under military surveillance, helicopters hovering over my apartment through the night. A Moratorium to End the War in Vietnam took place in Washington the following year. Over 750,000 people peacefully demonstrated. In a small way, I was involved in the planning and, during the protests, my apartment was crammed with fellow activists.

The Library of Congress was an amazing, fascinating place with compatible co-workers from all over the world—thousands of book people all in one place. However, the mission of the Library is to serve Congress, and the institution was a huge conservative bureaucracy serving a conservative and ineffective Congress as I saw it. I believed that if I stayed there I would have little contact with actual books or opportunities for civic activism.

So I moved to San Francisco, where Philip was living and urging me to come, and spent an enormous amount of time at City Lights while I was job hunting. It seemed like paradise, such a stimulating atmosphere where people could sit down to read, share ideas, and have conversations about books, politics, art. One day in early 1971 when I was walking down the street in North Beach, Lawrence hailed me and asked if I would like to help him with a bibliography of Allen Ginsberg’s writings.  After just a brief meeting at the publishing office, Lawrence went to Europe and his editorial assistant Jan Herman suddenly decided to move to Germany. Jan showed me how all the editorial work was done in the office, told me Lawrence “wouldn’t mind,” and so I found myself beginning an exciting new career in publishing.

 What was your experience taking over as executive director and co-owner in 1984?

The store back then employed seven people: six men at the bookstore and one (me) at the publishing branch. So “executive director” is far too grand a title. City Lights was a small, failing organization by 1982. The store was not founded to make profits for the owners and it never did make a profit. Breaking even was the goal. But every year the losses mounted and there came a time when there were very few books left on the shelves. No one had seen a customer venture downstairs to the lower part of the store for many months.  

At the time, Lawrence was immensely popular and in great demand as a performer and a speaker, so he was traveling much of the time, visiting foreign colleagues, living abroad, finding new writers to translate. At this low point in the store’s history Lawrence told me in a frustrated moment that if I’d like to own City Lights, he would give it to me outright if I would run the business, freeing him to do all the other things he wanted to do. I declined, but told him I would be honored to be his partner. Theft was seriously addressed, and a protracted payment plan was agreed to by Book People, the East Bay employee-owned distributors who extended us credit for a generous period. Savvy booksellers Richard Berman and Paul Yamazaki headed the re-stocking plan. The three of us would go every week to Book People and Lou Swift Distributors to collect enough books to sell the following week. As time went on, everybody at the store consulted book catalogs and took on the responsibility for buying subject sections. I envisioned a participatory structure. If not a co-op, I wanted a bookstore where all the staff had responsibilities and power.

Why the decision not to have multiple bookstore locations around SF?

At one time we seriously considered additional locations. We explored sites in San Francisco’s Mission district and visited city officials in San Jose to talk about a second store there. But our resources were limited, and we were concerned about the time and money that would be required to create a sister store that would embody the same spirit and ethic as the original. During my time as director, the evolving challenges from chain stores and especially Amazon made beginning a new store a very risky enterprise. In retrospect, so many independents were closing that we decided to invest in our present, iconic location. In retrospect I think it was a good decision after watching attempts by other stores fail to duplicate their success elsewhere.

How has North Beach changed, how has it stayed the same? With the exodus of Big Tech and falling rents, how do you think that will affect North Beach and San Francisco in general in the future? Will there be “a rebirth of wonder”?

North Beach when I came to SF was a small bohemian village, where neighbors shared meals on their flat rooftops watching the sun set over the Bay. My rent was $125 a month, cheap even then. City Lights and the Discovery Bookstore (used books) next door to Vesuvio were key places to spend an evening. Two large Italian grocers delivered (no charge) bags of groceries up four flights of stairs to my apartment. The neighborhood was full of inexpensive Basque, Italian, and Chinese restaurants, and many cafes, many of which seemed unchanged since the 19th century. Change happens, and City Lights is well prepared for the future. It’s never easy to predict how things will develop, but the feeling of a lovely Mediterranean town persists, with the wooden buildings painted pastel colors, and the shimmering sea light on misty days. I feel certain that the light of City Lights will prevail for a long time to come.

 Do you feel that your gender had any impact on your experience during your 23 years as director? Do you have any comments about women in bookselling or publishing in general?

Gender always has an impact. The Beat movement was certainly male focused. Even though the undaunted Diane di Prima was recognized, she was never enthusiastically supported by the inner nucleus of Beat poets. It was a long time before the Beat women came into their own. From the start, Lawrence, who insisted he wasn’t a Beat, had eclectic tastes and was open to women’s poetry. He admired Marianne Moore and Edna St. Vincent Millay as much as he did T.S. Eliot, Jacques Prévert, and Allen Ginsberg. In the Pocket Poets Series, he’d published di Prima and, very early in the series, both Marie Ponsot and Denise Levertov.

Women’s rights and opportunities are always vulnerable and cyclic. The Women’s Movement of the 1970s was very powerful and widespread, its impact on women’s lives enormous. At City Lights we hired more women; we published more women. There have always been outstanding women in publishing and bookselling, and during that time increasingly more women writers were published, reviewed, and were given accolades and awards. Women opened general bookstores and women’s bookstores, founded feminist and lesbian presses. It was a thrilling development, to see so many marginalized writers, and not just women, finding established publishers or creating their own presses. Together they created a larger, much more diverse national literature.

I’ve had the pleasure of working with many talented women at the bookstore. And in the publishing branch: Stella Levy, Kim McCloud, and Patricia Fujii. Gail Chiarello collected and edited our bestselling Bukowski stories. Annie Janowitz proposed the timely Unamerican Activities, and Amy Scholder brought us classics by Karen Finley, Rebecca Brown, and others. I’m happy to say that Amy Scholder is again working with City Lights as an editor.

When did you meet the now current publisher and executive director Elaine Katzenberger? What was her position at the bookstore? When did you know that she was the right person to take over as director?

Ah, Elaine, the woman who can do everything! Elaine began at the bookstore sales counter, then reorganized files and the store accounts, and very soon excelled as a book buyer. She had a great feeling for good writing, so I asked her to become an editor and she immediately began adding excellent books to City Lights’ list. She’s smart, witty, multitalented, and politically astute. We are very lucky to have her at the helm.

What is your understanding or vision of what of City Lights is and what it could be? How has Lawrence’s passing impacted this?

Lawrence’s democratic inclusiveness made him the best-selling poet in the U.S. His moral principles, his courage and resilience are a model to be emulated. He conceived City Lights as an educational institution that would open minds to explore and relate to the world through books. “One guy told me he’d got the equivalent of a Ph. D just sitting in the basement reading all our great books,” he often reminded us.

His “literary gathering place” was to be a fulcrum of San Francisco cultural experience, where our bookselling and publishing could amplify the voices of diverse experiences, connect with other creative communities, and serve as a center of dissent and, at the same time, a force for creating a better society.

Lawrence’s vision will continue to be our guiding light. An optimistic realist, he believed that City Lights would long endure as the co-creation of all the dedicated people who work here and make it what it is.

[gukyi]

tattoos together | kth

summary:��you aren’t necessarily terribly particular when it comes to tattoos, and when you arrive at your favorite tattoo parlor one day in search of a new addition, one in particular catches your eye, but more importantly, so does the artist behind its creation. and slowly, you come to realize that art does not need sentimental value to be meaningful—it just needs to be loved.

{tattoo artist!au}

pairing: kim taehyung x female reader genre: fluff word count: 5k warnings: mention of tattoo needles a/n: a huge huge huge thank you to @guksflavor for commissioning me for this piece, and thank you for contributing to the blm movement !!!! for anyone wondering--this was commissioned prior to my drabble commissions post, which is why it’s longer. hope that you enjoy!!!! 

When you go to a new city, your favorite thing to do is explore. 

Unpacking has never really been your forte, because it takes forever and it’s not as if any of the packages contain a surprise. You already know what’s in every single cardboard box strewn around your apartment, from the old clothes you never wear to the single set of nice dinnerware that you never use because you don’t ever have guests fancy enough to require usage of them. 

The beauty of the world is that it has so many hidden corners. So many hole-in-the-wall stores and secret alleyways shielded from street lights. Secrets unknown to even some of the locals. 

So yes, the boxes against the barren walls of your apartment can wait. 

They have been for the past couple of years, at least. What’s one more day?

Besides, if you hadn’t prioritized exploring over unpacking, you never would have found that little tattoo shop on the corner of South and Brooks, the one that looks more like a cottage-turned-overgrown-flower shop than a place where you go to get permanently inked. The walls are a pastel neutral shade, accented by exposed brick near the back and lined with drawings after drawings, new designs tacked over old ones, pages curling in on themselves after years of being hung up. 

From the inside or the outside, it doesn’t at all read like a stereotypical tattoo parlor. No black walls, no leather, no gothic lettering on the door. 

And that’s really the beauty of it all. That you would never know of this place if you hadn’t gone wandering, hadn’t decided that your unpacking of boxes could wait another couple of days (and maybe months, too). That there are secrets blanketing the city, and that you can learn them all, if only you keep your eyes peeled. 

Also, the tattoo parlor is right next to what you happily designate as the best bakery in the entire town, but that’s just a bonus. 

Still, Jungkook doesn’t ever seem to mind when you show up to a session with two coffees and a bag with two muffins inside of it. 

The bell above the door rings when you open it, stepping onto the beige welcome mat onto the tile. It’s been raining the past couple of days, and you can make out damp spots on the fabric where people have wiped their shoes. It’s busier than normal, today, several of the artists fielding requests and questions from eager clients, pointing at the designs on the wall or handing them their own sketches. 

But as always, Jungkook is free, loitering in the back corner with his hands tucked into the pockets of the dark jeans he’s wearing, as if he’d been expecting you all afternoon. 

Considering you are pretty much confidants after so many years of seeing him, you suppose that he’s picked up on your predictability—if only just a little. 

“What, don’t you have a job to be doing?” You ask instead of a hello, catching Jungkook’s attention immediately as you walk in, a bag of two scones in your hand. 

“Don’t have a job if you’re not here,” he quips back, strolling over casually and happily taking the napkin-wrapped baked good from your hand. He eats approximately half of it in a single bite as you settle down by his station, a vintage vanity that Jungkook says that the owner found at a thrift store. It’s awfully beat up as is, but looks more at home inside here, little succulents sitting, pressed up against the wall, and ink stains covering the countertop. 

“Touché,” you concede with a nod. 

“What are you here for today?” Jungkook asks over a mouthful of scone. “You got an actual design in mind or just want me to wing it?” 

“Am I not allowed to just say hello to one of my favorite people in the city?” You tease. 

Jungkook frowns. “‘One of’? Who else is there?” 

“Me, of course,” you tell him happily. “You got any new designs I can take a peek at?”

“See for yourself,” Jungkook says, motioning to the wall beside him as you giddily skirt over to take a look. You’re in here so often that Jungkook’s long foregone showing you which ones were recently added—deigning to sit at his table while you pick out the new ones from the old, which sketches weren’t tacked to the wall the last time you were in. 

There’s a couple of ones that you don’t recognize taped along the wall, or peeking out of the open binders that they have spread out on spare shelves and countertops, new designs of birds and flowers and snakes. But the one that really catches your eye is a small one, drawn on a piece of paper the size of a Post-it note. You almost miss it, half-hidden behind a much bigger sketch of an old grandfather clock, lines dark and heavy. It’s a simple line drawing, really, of the sun rising or setting along the horizon, its reflection shakily echoed in the water it stands above. It could almost be straight out of a scrapbook, a Polaroid of a real moment in time, a real sight someone saw. 

“This one’s new,” you say, fingers reaching up to page at the edges. 

Jungkook gets up to see what all of the fuss is about. “Oh, yeah, just added yesterday. You like it?”

“It’s pretty,” you say, unable to tear your eyes away from it. It’s so simple, so modest. Like a doodle that someone would draw in the margins of a textbook, like the start of a flipbook design in an old library book. “Looks almost like it was printed from offline.”

“You know everything in here is usually hand-drawn,” Jungkook chides. 

“Reminds me of a photograph,” you say as Jungkook reaches out with his hands to take the design down. “You know, like some really picturesque scene on a beach. With the sun reflected against the water.”

“Can’t tell if it’s rising or setting,” Jungkook comments, holding it out in front of him. 

“I think that’s the point.”

“So, where do you want it?” Jungkook asks. “And don’t say the bottom of your foot. I know you’re joking.”

You laugh, reminded of the time you had teasingly told him that you wanted a flock of birds tattooed beneath your feet, and he almost believed you before you burst into a fit of giggles. Pausing, you think. Where would you want something like that? Not your back, surely. To you, the whole point of a tattoo is to be able to see it. And not on your torso, either. You’ve grown rather accustomed to the feeling of a needle on skin, so the pain isn’t the issue, but a drawing like that isn’t meant to be kept secret. Not supposed to be hidden by your clothes. 

You can’t say that you’ve ever kept tattoos particularly serious, plotting out exactly what you’ll get inked and which part of your body will make it the most meaningful. Tattoos are but another art form, one that uses the skin as its canvas, and not all art is supposed to be perfect and purposeful and mean something. Art is in the eye of the beholder. It is, above all, supposed to make you happy. 

You love every single thing that Jungkook has drawn on your skin, and every single thing that was drawn before you met him. But this one is special. 

“Here,” you say, pulling up the sleeve of your shirt so it rests on your shoulders, tapping the empty space on your upper left arm. It’s surrounded with tattoos, with flowers and words and pictures, but there has always been an open space. One that you were saving for something extraordinary. 

“You sure? You know I can’t undo this as fast as I can do it,” Jungkook says, not to mock you but to make sure you aren’t making a mistake. 

Perhaps it’s your impulsive nature, the part of you that doesn’t really care about making mistakes so long as you can recognize that they happened, that makes you shrug. That isn’t terribly particular over where Jungkook places the needle. Tattoos are for fun. Taking everything serious is boring, anyway. 

“I’m sure,” you tell him, and Jungkook nods. He goes to transfer the design to a tattoo stencil as you wait, finishing up your scone. It’s a little harder now that you’ve waited a bit to eat it, not as soft as it was when Jungkook tore through his, but it’s delicious nonetheless. 

As you’re waiting, you hear the bell above the door ring. You turn around to look at the latest patron out of habit, that instinctual people-watching urge that bubbles up inside of you. 

You don’t recognize him. 

Which isn’t a first, per se, but you are in here rather often and have come to know most of the regulars, at least on a first-name basis. You wonder if he had just wandered in after strolling down the street, noticed the flowerpots hanging from the ceiling or the walls littered with designs or the cracking white paint that makes this place look like an old-timey ice cream store. His eyes, dark and brown and mysterious, go straight to the designs on the wall beside you, as if he knows exactly what he’s looking for. 

He looks down at you and the two of you meet eyes, his partially hidden by his caramel brown hair, yours looking up at him because it feels like you can’t turn away. There is something about him that makes you want to ask him to come here more often. Just so you can see him again. 

“Oh, Taehyung!” 

You turn back to see Jungkook returning with the design on a stencil, toothy smile widening when he sees the boy in question, a wave of familiarity rushing over his features. 

“Jungkook,” Taehyung says, and the two of them greet each other the way that all men do, with that unspoken hand grab-turned-back pat. “Was in this part of the city and thought I’d stop by. See how my favorite skin artist is doing.”

“Ugh,” Jungkook says with a roll of his eyes, “I hate when you call me that. It’s weird and makes me sound like I make art with skin.”

“Don’t you?” Taehyung poses teasingly, making Jungkook shove him playfully. 

“Shut up,” Jungkook responds, heading over to where you’re seated and placing the stencil down on the table. “Y/N here is getting one of your designs on her arm.”

That has you engaged. 

“You drew this?” You ask, picking the stencil back up and holding it out to him. 

Taehyung takes a couple of steps forward and reaches a hand out to look at the drawing in closer detail, before nodding. “Sketched it a couple of days ago. Jungkook said that it might make a nice tattoo.”

“Jungkook has terribly good judgement,” you agree. “I didn’t know you drew for Jungkook.”

“Eh, it’s not a job or anything,” Taehyung says with a shrug. “I like doodling things on the side. Jungkook being a tattoo artist is just a bonus.”

“I’ll say,” Jungkook says with a forced cough. “Y/N’s got a couple of your drawings actually, Tae. That one of the cherry blossoms, and the one with the teddy bear.”

“You did those, too?” You ask, getting more and more pleasantly surprised with every minute that passes. 

“You kidding?” Jungkook scoffs. “Taehyung’s art is all over this place. My boss is actually getting kind of annoyed with how much real estate his drawings take up, but clients seem to really like them, so they stay.”

“So you’re saying it’s not my infectious personality?” Taehyung quips, making you laugh. He and Jungkook seem to go well together. 

Jungkook sighs, a smile tugging loosely at his lips. “Get out of here, I’ve got a client,” he says fondly, motioning to you. 

“Kicking me out after five minutes? I think that’s a new record,” Taehyung says, peering at the old clock on the wall. 

“Don’t get used to it,” Jungkook says, even though it’s obvious that the both of them already are. Jungkook’s too kind, too sweet, too wonderful to ever turn away a friend. Even if he does have a client. 

“Nice to meet you, Y/N,” Taehyung says with a tip of an imaginary hat. His smile makes the blood rush to your cheeks, charming and for some reason, irresistible. “Hope that we see each other again soon. I’d love to see your tattoos.”

“I hope so too,” you say, positively enchanted, as he exits, the bell ringing on his way out. 

You wonder why you hadn’t met him before. You suppose that you just always missed each other. 

You sort of hope that, after this, you never do.

You run into Taehyung a couple of days afterwards in the bakery next door to the tattoo parlor. You’re standing by the coffee counter, chatting to one of the baristas who always teases you for buying two of everything whenever you’re there, when you spot him wandering in, the same curious look on his face. He doesn’t notice you at first but you see him straight away, recognize him instantly. It looks like he just accidentally stumbled upon this place, like he had been walking and walking and walking and when he looked up, he was inside. 

You wonder if Taehyung comes here as often as you do. Wonder if he makes an effort to always stop in since he drops by the parlor on a regular basis. Wonder how long you’ve gone, cruelly so, just missing each other. 

“Y/N?”

You look up to see him gazing at you, a lopsided smile tugging at his features. Next to you, the barista hands you your bag of baked goods, two as always, and winks before getting back to work. 

“Hey, I didn’t see you come in,” you lie, hoping that he didn’t catch you ogling him as he walked inside. “You stop by often?”

“Whenever I get the chance to,” Taehyung says back. “I like carbs and coffee.”

“Then I suppose you’ve found the perfect place to be,” you say. And then, in a blaze of courage, you ask, “Are you just popping in, or do you want to sit down for a little?”

Taehyung smiles, warm and wonderful. “I’d be happy to.”

You snag a table in the corner, facing away from the barista who keeps sending you nonsensical and exaggerated facial expressions and gestures, because this is not a movie, and he is not your beautiful love interest who waltzes into your life and sweeps you off your feet. Even if he is rather beautiful. 

“I got two pastries,” you say, tugging them out of the bag, still wrapped in napkins. “Want one?”

Taehyung chuckles as you hand one to him. “Do you always get two of what you order?”

“Hey, I like carbs too,” you tell him defensively, making Taehyung nod in agreement. Seeing as you bought them just a few minutes ago, they’re still warm, soft between your fingers as you pull apart the dough and slowly take a bite. It tastes even sweeter than usual. 

“Do you come here often?” Taehyung poses. 

“Anytime I drop by the parlor,” you add cheerfully. “And sometimes even when I don’t.”

“We seem to always be missing each other, then,” Taehyung muses. 

“Hopefully that will change,” you add with a grin. “Jungkook finished my tattoo a couple of days ago. Do you want to see?”

“The one of my drawing?” Taehyung asks, even though he already knows the answer. 

“What else would there be?” You say, pulling up the sleeve of your shirt to reveal the design. It’s only been a few days, so the tattoo hasn’t had nearly enough time to fully heal, but the sketch is just as prominent as it was when it was first pressed into your skin. It fits perfectly in the empty space that was there before, the lines filling out the blanks between the other pictures. Almost as if that spot had been waiting for the right thing to fill it. Almost as if it had always belonged there. 

Taehyung’s mouth opens in awe as you show him, the skin still raised where the needle had pressed against it. You have to say you don’t really mind showing off your tattoos to others, especially when they bring you so much joy yourself, and people are usually more appreciative than disapproving, but watching the way Taehyung’s face lights up when he sees his design, his sketch, his art on your skin makes your heart beat something terribly fierce. 

The beauty of tattoos is that it is permanent art. Art on the wall of a museum will need to be constantly restored, will be moved from place to place as people bid hundreds of thousands of dollars on owning it. But tattoos follow you wherever you go, will keep you company no matter what the circumstances are. It is art that is permanent, because it will never leave you. 

It seems that Taehyung has realized that as well. 

“Wow, I—” Taehyung says, rubbing at the bottom of his lip, unable to tear his eyes away from the dark ink decorating your body. “I don’t know what to say.”

“I’ll let Jungkook know that you really like it,” you say, pleased. “He did an excellent job, as always.”

“Why?” Taehyung asks, the simple question being the only word he’s able to form, the only thing he’s able to think. 

“‘Why?’” You repeat, an eyebrow raised. “Why did I get it?”

“Why did you get that one?” Taehyung says for emphasis, pointing to the design laced along your upper arm. “Out of the millions of possibilities, why choose mine?”

“Oh,” you say, at a loss for words. It’s difficult to pinpoint why. It doesn’t have a terribly sentimental meaning to you. No long-lasting symbolism that has followed you throughout your life. You chose it because it was simple and easy and beautiful. Because you thought that it would be the perfect fit. “Well, I don’t have a great reason.”

“It’s permanent ink on your body,” Taehyung says. “You must have thought it meant something.”

“I just liked the way it looked,” you say. “It was so plain and modest, but it looks like a scene out of a movie. Like a moment captured in time. I don’t know—” you shrug, “—it sort of reminds me of a Polaroid picture. The sun halfway above the horizon. Its reflection on the water.”

Taehyung is speechless, a soft grin slowly inching its way across his face. He looks fond, looks grateful and honored. Like what you told him was the perfect answer. 

“Is the sun rising or setting, Taehyung?” You ask, curious. You suppose that no matter what he chooses, it’ll be the right answer. That the sun can either be rising or setting, so long as you know that it will always return. If it’s rising, it is but a reminder that there is a whole day ahead of you. That you have so much to do and so much to look forward to. And if it’s setting, it’s to let you know that you made it another day, another twenty-four hours. The sun may be saying goodbye, but you can never lose faith that it will come back to say hello. 

Taehyung seems to ponder for a moment, eyes tilting upwards as he thinks, lets the question weigh on his heart. And then he turns to you, a glint in his eye, and he says, “You think it’s the sun?”

And truth be told, you had never considered that it might be the moon. 

In the stark black-and-white of a single-color tattoo, it could be anything you wanted. It could be a massive planet in another galaxy, could be a sweet chocolate ball sinking into a warm cup of milk. But Taehyung thinks it’s the moon. He sees the absent sky as dark, sees the circle in the center as the one that watches over you when you sleep. 

The sun and the moon are the only two constants in everybody’s life. One will never be without the other. And they will always chase after each other, circling the sky every day and every night, eternally unable to stay together. 

Perhaps it is the moon. Or the sun. Perhaps it is rising, or setting. 

And perhaps that is why you chose this design. Because of its ambiguity. Because it can mean so much despite being so little, which is what art is for, isn’t it? To see something and make it beautiful in your eyes? To always look at the world through rose-colored glasses?

No matter what it is, it will remind you that you are never alone. No, even when you have nothing left, the sun and the moon will always stand by you, watch over you. They will light up the path in front of you and guard you on your journey. 

“Well,” you ask Taehyung, smiling. You wonder briefly if that was the whole point of his design. For it to represent whatever the viewer wanted it to. And then you realize that of course that was the point. That Taehyung drew it like this on purpose. Tattoos will follow you for the rest of your days. So will the sun and the moon.“What do you think it is?”

You don’t see Taehyung for a while after that. 

Not that you had been expecting to inexplicably bump into him on the street, or anything, but you were secretly hoping that your luck had changed. That you were slowly beginning to make up for all of the moments you missed each other, all of the times you were just five minutes away from meeting, always just a little too early or a little too late. 

Still, you wish that you could see him more, or at least more often than you currently do, which is never. You know so little about him and yet there is something that draws you closer, makes you want to sift through the layers of dust between his bones, find out what makes his brain tick and his heart beat.

Ever since he walked into the tattoo parlor that day, strolling in with his hands on his pockets and witty comeback on the tip of his tongue, you haven’t been able to stop thinking about him. About how his art is etched onto your skin eternally. About how he does everything with purpose. 

Meeting him was no accident. 

Is it possible that you were always meant to know each other?

After a month, you return to the parlor, half in search of another design to add to the collection and half hoping that maybe your luck will change and you’ll be able to see him again. And if not, at least there’s always Jungkook to keep you company. 

You drop by the bakery and pick up a very optimistic three scones, just on the off chance that Taehyung may be there when you arrive. Besides, you can’t imagine Jungkook complaining about free food, let alone extra of it. 

But when you arrive, you’re shocked to see that Jungkook is busy working on someone. 

“Taehyung?” You ask, his name the first word to come out of your mouth when you enter. He’s sitting at the same stained white vanity sleeve rolled up as Jungkook presses the needle against his skin. He’s wincing, in that way that people who are getting their first tattoo do, not necessarily from pain but simply from the feeling. 

Jungkook pulls the needle away from Taehyung’s arm before the two of them both turn to look at you, equally as shocked by your presence. 

“Y/N,” Taehyung says back, almost as if your very existence has taken his breath away. 

“You weren’t supposed to come for another hour or so,” Jungkook says, checking the clock on the wall. 

“Are you complaining to the person who brings you free baked goods?” You ask, making Jungkook shake his head in a guilty no. You saunter over to the table to pull out the scones, giddy about having rightly purchased a third, when you notice the design slowly being imprinted onto Taehyung’s skin. 

It’s the same one you have. 

“Hey, what’s this?” You ask, not necessarily looking for an actual response so much as wondering aloud. Taehyung’s getting it in the same place as yours, the upper arm, a single drawing of ink on bare, untouched skin. It must mean something rather special to be his first. “Is that—?”

“Don’t be mad at me for copying you,” Taehyung says sheepishly. “The more I thought about it the more I liked it.”

“I’m not mad at you,” you tell him. 

“I don’t know,” Taehyung says with a sigh as Jungkook motions towards the needle, a silent question to see if Taehyung’s still alright with him continuing. Taehyung nods, letting only his eyes drift upwards to yours as Jungkook goes back in. “I mean, I guess it’s kind of impulsive, isn’t it? Getting a tattoo after seeing what it looked like on someone else. But when we were talking about it, I just thought about how detailed it really was. How it said so much despite being so little.”

“That’s what I thought about it, too,” you say with a grin. “It’s special. I mean, every tattoo is special, but this one is because it can mean whatever you want it to mean. Whether it’s the sun or the moon, rising or setting. And the beauty of it is that you can change your mind about it, too.” 

If one day, you would rather the moon watch over you, keep the waves calm on a quiet night, where your thoughts are loud and heavy, then it will. But if, the next day, you want some light to shine down upon the field of daisies and wildflowers in your heart, then the sun will come out. No matter which it is, it will stand guard over you, protect you from what the rest of the world will try to throw at you. 

“What do you think it is, Jungkook?” Taehyung asks, making Jungkook stop. 

Jungkook looks down at the drawing, at what he is pressing into Taehyung’s skin, and he says, “I think it’s the rising sun. Telling all of us to look forward to a brand new day.”

You smile. “And what do you think it is, Taehyung?”

Taehyung doesn’t skip a beat. “I think it can be all four all at once—the sun rising, the sun setting, the moon rising, the moon setting. It just depends on what you want it to be.”

“You know,” you say with a grin. “We’re going to have matching tattoos now.”

“Oh, are we?” Taehyung asks cheekily, even though nothing he ever does is accidental. Not the sketch, not the tattoo, and certainly not its placement. 

“We are,” you say, pulling up your sleeve for good measure. “They could be buddies. Hang out and take pictures together.”

“What about us?” Taehyung asks. “Can we hang out and take pictures together too?”

“Are you asking me out on a date?” You pose, even though you already know the answer. 

“That depends,” Taehyung quips back. “Are you saying yes to one?”

“I think I am,” you say, pleased smiles lacing their way across your faces. Taehyung is beaming, the discomfort of a needle barely even registering, as he grins at you, charming and brilliant and bright. “And I look forward to it.”

“Me too.” Taehyung nods. 

“I’m here to hopefully get another tattoo,” you tell him, raising your eyebrows. “If you want, you can stick around and maybe we can get tattoos together.”

“Isn’t that a bit impulsive?” Taehyung smirks. 

“Aren’t you?”

And you think that, even though the universe kept you apart for so long—separated by minutes, perhaps even seconds—it sort of always knows what it’s doing. You were never not going to meet. It was just a matter of when. 

And the sun and moon will never not protect you. It is just a matter of which. 

↳ links are broken, but don’t forget to message me with any thoughts or feedback!

[journeystartstoday]

Story Time

The Adoption - Meeting A New Friend

Words: 4623

Summary: This is the story version of how the adoption process went from start to end with @adventures-on-foster-island ! Thanks again!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

It was unsettling to settle back in to say the least.

Going from constantly traveling to sitting at home everyday was a change neither me or my pokemon were very happy about at first. Of course, I had discussed it with them before I made the decision to come home, and of course, it was great to see my family and friends again after that year away, but it was also... slower. More controlled. Less exciting in a way that constantly being surrounded by the unexpected does to you. In my little rented appartment in Rota, there were no wild pokemon that would steal my lunches, no random trainers that would challenge me as soon as our eyes met. There were no mad dashes to outrun rain clouds and no seeking shelter with wild pokemon... everything was peaceful. Everything was safe.

Luckily, it never became boring. In my first couple of days back, just as I was taking a stroll around town to see what had changed and to greet the merchants and shopkeepers I grew up around, Miss Chiba from the bakery offered me a job. The best kind of coincidence, right? During my journey I had garnered many different recipes and tips and tricks to make different pasteries, so of course I happily agreed. Eevee was over the moon when I told them the news and insisted on keeping me company during my working hours... totally not because they had a sweet tooth and were banking on getting all the left-overs and taste tests they would likely be gifted if they hung around the kitchen all day...

Okay, so maybe I had spoiled Eevee too much on our time on the road. Nothing wrong with that.

To my surprise, Riolu declined the invitation to come along with us, even if she was as much a sweets lover as Eevee. Instead, she wanted to keep training and keep honing her powers so she could be ready for when I would inevitably go on another journey again. It was sweet, so I let her, with the promise that she came by during lunch break so we could all eat together and hear about her process.

And that's how my days back home went from then on. Eevee and I would see Riolu to the city wall and wave her goodbye as she headed towards the small forest where she liked to train, and then Eevee and I were off to the bakery. It was a nice change of pace for a while. Homey. Safe. But after a couple of weeks I started to get this weird, empty feeling. Like something was missing. Incomplete.

Whether it was because of my former partner Squirtle, who had left the team at the end of my journey through Kanto to be with a group of wild Squirtle that wanted him to be their leader and protector; or because my apartment was a little small (even if it beat my little tent by a mile) and I felt constricted somehow... I don't know. But the short version of it was that I wanted to change things up a little. I couldn't go on another journey. Not yet. Only a couple more weeks and I had enough money for that. However, a friend recommended me something else. Something better.

Adopt a pokemon.

To be honest, I was a little skeptical of it at first, since I didn't know if I was capable of caring for a pokemon that could possibly have bad memories with people, but I still wanted to give it a chance. I wouldn't be a very good trainer if I wouldn't.

It was on one of my days off, and Eevee and I persuaded Riolu to take a rest day too, so we could all walk towards the closest pokemon centre together. There, I made a call. It was to Ellisa, former pokemon researcher and head caregiver of Foster Island, an island facility dedicated to saving and caring for neglected, abandoned, or abused pokemon. Of course, there were multiple ways to adopt a pokemon, but my friend had been really adamant about this place. I could hardly argue against it, especially when she showed me one of the pokemon she had adopted from the place. It was a little cutie, so precious, but still a bit wary of other trainers. It totally convinced me. It would take a while to travel there once I had chosen a date to look at the pokemon for adoption, but at least this saved me from doing hours of research and chickening out. All in all, it was a great way to adopt a new friend.

Anyway, I called Ellisa and after a short trading of names and giving introductions, I told Ellisa my story and told her a bit about what I did in daily life nowadays. It wasn't much to go on honestly, so I was pleasantly surprised when after about two hours, Ellisa called me back to say she had a few candidates that would like to meet me! I was so excited and immediately scheduled a day I would come by. The days that followed where filled with daydreaming and planning my short trip overseas, but I was so looking forward to it that time flew by in no time!

~*~

And now I sit here, on the deck of a ship that is taking me, Riolu and Eevee towards Foster Island. Finally! I'm a little nervous if I have to be honest, but I think the knot in my stomach belongs to the good kind of nerves. The jittery, excited kind.

"Eievui!" Little brown paws clamber across my leg. Eevee smugly sits themselves on my lap and strains their neck to look over the railing of the ship.

"Be careful," I say to them, gently placing a hand against their belly to keep them from falling off. Eevee just wiggles a little on my lap, but keeps watching the water pokemon before us. Seels skirt across the water's surface, while magikarps and tympoles occasionally spring from the water in high arcs before they dissappear under the waves again. Everytime the latter happens, Eevee squals in glee, never failing to point out that there was a water pokemon there, did you see that?!

Or at least, I think they say that. I could be wrong.

I softly pat Eevee's head as they keep watching the waves and I slowly turn to meet Riolu's gaze. She stands next to the door that leads inside the boat. Ever since I received her, she has always been the 'cool' type of pokemon. Crosses her arms, stands slightly back and leans against the wall of the ship so you can't see the happy sparkle in her eyes - the whole deal. It only makes her cuter honestly. I'm carefull not to break her bubble though. She once tried to tell me that she did it because she felt like she was the protector of our little family. So cute.

She believes that for that she always has to stay back and keep watch. Keep us safe.

And she does. She really does keep us safe, both during our journey and now that we are on a trip to find a new friend. I just hope she can let her guard down a little when we meet them so there's no hostility or anything from the start. I've been told Riolu's cold demeaner scares off some pokemon, but I'm sure that won't be the case now. To be sure, I ask with my eyes if she's doing alright. She simply nods back.

Okay, so she is just as nervous as I am, I'm glad.

After a period of watching the waves and listening to the soft chitter from Eevee, the boat finally moors on Foster Island, an assistent already waiting for me there. She gives me a soft smile and brings me along to the care facility further down the coast. I'm no connoiseur on architecture, but the building just screamed safe and open to me as soon as I saw it. A lot of glass, a lot of white, happy paintings of happy pokemon on banners at both sides of the entrance. Just as we enter the building, I let Eevee down from where I kept them against my chest. I saw a small playground just to my left. They always love those.

"Come back when I call, 'kay?" I yell at their retreating form.

"Vuivui!"

...I'll search for them when the time comes.

The assistent leads me and Riolu further into the building untill we arrive at a large room, one wall completely made of glass so everyone can see the small garden on the other side. From where I enter I can already see a couple of Bidoof chasing each other in a friendly game of tag, while a Pachirisu and Buneary are peeking out from behind a bush and watch them with interest. It warms my heart to see them so carefree. Who knows what they have had to endure to come here?

"You may take a seat here," the assistent says and gestures around at the various sofa's and beanbags, "Ellisa will meet you shortly. Please make yourself comfortable."

"Thank you-" The assistent is already gone. Well. Okay.

I sit down on one particularly soft-looking beanbag and almost drown it, before righting myself. Hopefully nobody was watching the security cameras; that was akward. Next to me, Riolu snickers. I have the urge to respond sarcastically, but... well, it was kind of funny. I laugh with her.

The floor of this room is a soft carpet, pastel colored circles spread across it that makes the place look happy and safe. A perfect place to play. I'm almost tempted to throw off my shoes and let my feet rest on the soft carpet, but I decid that it would probably be best not to do that in a public space.

Riolu and I watch the pokemon behind the glass play and relax, untill a door to my right opens.

"Sky?"

"Yes, that's me."

Ellisa steps inside the room and holds out her hand. I shake it.

"It's nice to finally meet you in person," Ellisa says.

"Likewise." I smile at her, but soon my eye catches movement behind her. A small Bidoof appears from behind her legs. It's body is smaller than the Bidoof I had seen in the garden and it's teeth are far more white. Like they have been cleaned far more recently. Or are newly grown. I hope it's not the latter.

Ellisa notices my gaze and smiles softly at Bidoof. "This is Bidoof," she introduces it, "This one came to us with overgrown front teeth, as her trainer left her in a crate with nothing to chew most of the time. Her mouth has fully recovered, as you can see, as well as her fighting spirit." She came a little closer to me to whisper, "She does still have claustrophobia however, so avoid putting her in any kind of container or very small room if you choose her."

As soon as I hear that I can feel my heart break a little. That must have been horrible. No wonder even now, Bidoof seems skittish around me. It wouldn't be easy to open yourself up to new people after experiencing something like that.

"It is nice to meet you Bidoof," I say and crouch down in front of her. I want to pet her, but decide against it. Instead I give her my brightest smile. "I'm glad you're doing alright now."

Bidoof cautiously shuffles from behind Ellisa's legs and approaches me. She's just precious. When she's close enough, Bidoof dips her head down a little.

Ah, I understand.

"May I?"

"Bi-bi."

I reach out with my hand and slowly, gently cart my fingers through her fur. It is incredibly soft. Bidoof croons quietly.

"This is going to be impossible..." I murmur to myself. How will I ever choose? I stand up again, to the slight disappointment of Bidoof. Ellisa just smiles and nods at an assistent that just entered the room with a pokemon in their arms. It's a Lotad, but with a small, pale purple water lilly on it's lilly pad. It's so cute!

"This is Lotad," Ellisa says, and thanks the assistent as she takes Lotad in her own arms, "This is the sweetest little guy in our garden pool. We assume that he was abandoned before the flower bloomed, and the trainer thought he was sick when he saw the bud growing... He's pretty cold resistant, and finds it too hot here on the island. He said he'd like to travel again soon."

I smile at Lotad, who shyly turns his gaze away. I can't imagine anyone leaving him just for his looks. It almost makes me mad, but I manage to keep my smile as I nod at Lotad. "You look beautiful Lotad, anyone thinking otherwise cannot see what is right in front of them."

The water type shifts a little in Ellisa's arms, but I can see it preens at the compliment. Good.

A soft knock on the open door alerts me to the next arrival. A Skarmory stands in the doorway, it's expression closed off and cold. Scars litter it's body that resemble the silhouettes of dead trees, as if his body is still in the hold of their branches and never managed to escape them. It saddens my heart. Skarmory must notice my expression, because as he steps further into the room, he grumbles and turns his head away from me.

Ellisa starts with the introduction as if there has not already happened an akward exchange between us.

"This is Skarmory. He was rescued from a poaching operation about a year ago, and had been badly electrocuted multiple times there. Although he is all healed, his scars never disappeared..." Skarmory shifts on his legs, but keeps his eyes on the ground. "I know he may look intimidating-"

May look intimidating? He practically already rejected me after our eyes met for only a second!

"-but I swear that it's quite on the contrary. Skarmory here has the largest heart of any of the pokemon here and will put himself in danger if that means he can help those he cares about."

I swallow through the rejection and tug my lips back up in a smile. "It is nice to meet you, Skarmory." My voice gets stuck in my throat. What else can I say to him? He even refuses to look me in the eye...

No doubt picking up on my unease, Riolu steps forward and quietly growls something at Skarmory. The steel and flying type does look up from that, but his expression is anything but friendly. Before Riolu can get closer and possibly start a fight, I step in between the two hard heads.

"Be nice, you two. This is just an introduction session, no time for a battle." I look at Riolu and raise an eyebrow. Riolu huffs, but stands back. My arms drop back to my sides. "Good."

I turn to Ellisa, who is placing Lotad on the ground. She pulls a spray bottle from... somewhere, and softly sprays his lilly pad. Then as she stands up, she smiles at all three of the adoption pokemon now present.

"These are the pokemon that were the most insistent on meeting with you, Sky," she says. I can't help but be a little surprised by that and try to catch Skarmory's eyes, but he has his head down again. "You have about the next hour or so to get to know them and play a little with them. I will come back when it's time to say goodbye or for you to make a choice. You may choose if you want to stay inside or if you want to go into the garden, that's up to you. I hope you will all have a good time." After saying her goodbyes to the pokemon, she leaves us alone.

It is quiet for a second, but I decide to take the lead and break the silence. I clasp my hands together.

"Alright! What about you three give us a tour of the garden? I would like to see all your favorite spots. Does that sound like a plan?"

"Bi-bi!" Bidoof happily makes his way to the door, and Lotad and a hesitant Skarmory follow her. I take Riolu's paw and follow behind them. Hopefully, all will work out now.

~*~

The garden truly is a special place. There's something for every kind of pokemon — a small patch of ice in the corner for pokemon who want to cool down after playing, a sandy part for pokemon to sunbathe in. A small pool is surrounded by low grass hills, and trees and bushes provide cover from the sun that shines down from between the walls of the facility. Patches of flowers are scattered across the grass, and I think I even saw some holes that were no doubt dug out by pokemon to create makeshift tunnels underground.

And really all sorts of pokemon live here. When Bidoof showed me her favorite hiding place between a circle of small, blue berrie bushes, I spotted an Aromatisse and a Goomy hiding there as well. When Lotad showed me how he liked to drift in the pool and play with the other water types, I saw a Helioptile just off the side recharching in the sun, while a Ledian quietly zoomed by. The garden was almost filled to the brim with different kinds of pokemon, but it seemed that everyone had found their own little places and spots. It warmed my heart to see it.

During the tour outside, Riolu had stood back, leaning next to the glass door we entered from with her arms crossed. Skarmory had stayed back as well, but at the other side of the door, still visibly avoiding getting too close to any of us. Secretly, I hoped that they would be able to gain an understanding during their quiet brooding, so I let them to themselves.

Besides, I had already enough to do just following the increasingly enthusiastic Lotad and Bidoof around. Halfway through our walk through the garden, a caregiver brought Eevee to the garden and, instantly, a friendship bloomed between them and the adoption pokemon. From that moment on, I let myself fall down in the grass and told them to go on playing. I needed a break.

~*~

Now, I sluggishly blink my eyes open as I feel a soft prodding against my cheek. "Wha-" I yawn. My eyes adjust to the sunlight and begin to focus. Riolu is kneeling beside me, poking my cheek and softly calling my name.

"Rio... Rio."

I wipe away some drool and lift myself from the ground with one arm. "I'm awake, I'm awake."

Riolu sits back on her knees. "Riolu-ri, Rio."

"I know, I know," I say, "but I was too comfortable to resist it." I rub my eyes and look around. I'm still in the garden of the Foster Island's adoption facility, but... there are no pokemon anywhere nearby.

A low growl startles me. I look to my left, where Skarmory is standing. He's looking straight at me, but I can't figure out what his expression means. Is he mad? Irritated?

"Ah, you're awake." The door to the garden opens and Ellisa steps inside. She smiles knowingly. "I was just about to announce that your time is up for today, since we have another appointment in half an hour. I have to say though... this has been the most unusual getting-to-know session I have seen in a while."

I feel heat rise to my cheeks. I hastily push myself from the ground and wipe away some grass blades from my clothes and hair. "I'm so sorry!" I exclaim, "I hadn't meant to fall asleep! I'm sorry I scared everyone away..." I look around. Was that a Pachirisu I saw ducking behind a bush? Oh no, I really scared them...

Ellisa laughs.

...Huh?

"Oh, quite on the contrary," Ellisa assures me, "the pokemon were all so curious to come closer. Most of them have never seen a human so unguarded around them before. When some of them began to climb on top of you however... Skarmory and Riolu stepped in and chased them away. Together, might I add." A glint in her eye. "They make quite the team."

Oh.

I look at Riolu, then Skarmory. Skarmory averts his gaze. I still smile at him. "Well, thank you then. For saving me," I say.

Skarmory grunts quietly.

"Lu-rio," Riolu adds. She sounds approving, almost proud.

Guess the choice is already made for one of us.

"And... where is Eevee?" I turn back to Ellisa, who nods at a collection of trees just off the side. I carefully approach the trees and when I hold away a couple of branches, I am pleasantly surprised. There, right between the trees, are Lotad, Eevee and Bidoof, quietly nibbling on some red berries. The leafs russle as I move them and Eevee looks up from her meal at the sound.

"Eievui!" They bounce from their spot, right into my arms. I almost drop them, but quickly adjust.

"Hi there. I see you entertained yourself just fine?"

"Eievui-vui!"

"I'm glad."

I look at Lotad and Bidoof. "And I'm sorry, but Ellisa told me my time's up for now. I hope you can forgive me for falling asleep when we had only so little time to get to know each other."

"Tad."

"Bidoof."

They both nod and follow me from inbetween the trees back to where Ellisa, Riolu and Skarmory are waiting for us. I bring Eevee along in my arms.

"In some adoption cases, I advice the trainers to come back for a second time, either when they're still not sure who to choose or if I think the pokemon haven't accepted them yet," Ellisa says.

I nod, already planning another date in my mind I could get free to come over once more.

"...However," Ellisa says and I look up in surprise, "I would say that in this instance a second appointment is not really necessary, is it?" She looks at the adoption pokemon. "I saw the way they interacted with you and I must say they haven't been this expressive and... happy in a while. I am sure any of them would be ecstatic if you were to adopt them."

My mouth is agape, I know it, but I can't help it. All three of them... like me? I let my eyes drift over them and they all look back with the pokemon-equivalent of smiles.

The choice had been hard, but even I cannot deny that I already feel which of them would fit my little family the best. Even if I was not awake to experience it, I know it when I look at them. I know it when I look at Riolu.

They would be the perfect fit.

I slowly breathe in through my nose, out of my mouth. This is it.

"I... I think you're right," I say carefully, paying attention to each of the adoption pokemon responses. Bidoof stares at me with sparkling eyes, Lotad's flower spreads even wider open and even Skarmory chances a glance at me, but quickly looks the other way.

Ellisa nods. "Then please, say your choice and be sure to give your goodbyes to the others. I will be waiting for you inside." Ellisa then turns around and leaves me along with my pokemon and the others. I sigh and crouch in front of the three pokemon anxiously awaiting my words.

"You would all be amazing fits to my team, I can feel that. And this wasn't an easy choice, so please, know that whatever I choose here, some trainer will come by that will pick you too, alright? No feeling down about it, because your time will come. I know it." I swallow before I continue. "...but I think I have chosen already."

I shift a little to look at each of them, my eyes landing and staying on the last of the three, who, for the first time this afternoon, actually looks back.

"I hope I can earn your trust, Skarmory, because you already have mine. Will you accept becoming a part of my team?"

I see the exact moment the implications of the words settle in, because small beads start the form at the corners of Skarmory's eyes. He closes them, then opens them and says, "Skar-skarmory." It sounds unsure, but hopeful.

"I take that as a yes." I smile at him. "I think you will be a perfect fit. Thank you for accepting my offer."

I look at the other two. "You are wonderful, the both of you. As I said, your moment will come, I am sure of it. Please stay safe here untill that time comes, alright?"

"Tad-tad."

"Bi-bi."

I nod at them. "May we meet again then. Goodbye for now." I give one last pat on each of their heads and turn around, heading back inside with Eevee in my arms, Riolu and Skarmory right behind me. It already feels right. It's as if this formation is how it was always supposed to be.

My smile widens.

Ellisa meets me and my pokemon in the lobby. Her eyes turn soft at the sight of Skarmory flanking on my left and Riolu on my right.

"A great choice. Do you believe me now, Skarmory? I always told you someone would see past your scars."

Ellisa leads me and my pokemon to her office and helps me in arranging the adoption. I first have to catch Skarmory to register him to my trainer ID, so Ellisa hands me a great ball. I try to refuse and use one of my own normal balls, but she insists that this comes with every adoption on Foster Island.

As long as Riolu doesn't get jealous that Skarmory gets a great ball, alright then.

I hold the ball in front of me and Skarmory steps formard and touches the button with the tip of his wing. A light engulfes him and shake, shake, shake, I caught him! I quickly release him again so he can watch me sign all the documents and papers in order to make the rest of the adoption official. Because Ellisa needs to explain more than one of the documents to me in detail, my pokemon quickly lose interest and Eevee jumps from my lap to join Riolu and Skarmory in a simple ball game on the other side of the office. I try not to be distracted too much, but... let's just say Ellisa has to explain some forms at least twice before I get it.

When all that is done, Ellisa and I set a date for Skarmory's six-month check-up and yearly physicals. Just before our meeting will come to an end, Ellisa gives me a large list of care tips in how to make sure Skarmory will be alright. It's long, but I know I'll need it. I take multiple pictures of the list, fold it and stuff it into my backpack.

After finishing up the lasts formalities, finally, Ellisa stands from behind her desk and extends her hand to me.

"I hope you and Skarmory will grow closer and closer and become the best of partners!"

I smile at her and then at Skarmory, who briefly stops to look at me too before he kicks the ball to Eevee. There is an understanding there. A promise.

"I think we will," I say, "I'll make sure of it."

[guiding--x]

@gazingarcane ❤️’d for a starter from Sora!

He was lost. 

Plain and simple, and hardly for the first time, Sora’s woke to an unfamiliar land. He felt warm sunshine upon his face, silky grass underneath his hands, and a soothing breeze tousling his hair like a gentle touch. He felt the familiar tug of sleep calling his name, and the urge to drift back off was immense. Just a few more moments, he told himself. It wouldn’t matter much; the final battle was over, everyone was safe, and he had worked so... very... hard... If nothing else, he deserved a chance to rest. 

Sora, you lazy bum. I knew I'd find you snoozing down here.

Sharply, his eyelids snapped open, breath filling his lungs. His body lurched upright as he choked and sputtered as dandelion seeds filled his mouth. He stuck his tongue out, blowing raspberries to try and clear the excess fluff. And when he was finally free from their insistent hold, he found himself stilling, taking a chance to examine the world around him.

It was beautiful. Soft light warmed the world, pastels painted across the sky like a sunrise. Before him stretched woodlands, quiet and cozy, cut by a well worn path. Behind him, he saw the edge of the cliff he sat upon, and past that was a town. Seas of purple roofs and pale gold streets, and closer to the horizon, a massive clock tower which spurred the barest sense of familiarity. But... how? For the life of him, Sora couldn’t remember ever coming to a world like that. And still, a name came to him, like a whisper in his ear...

“Daybreak... Town?”

[lily-blue]

Little red

☆ characters: werewolf!jin & little red riding hood!irene & little sister!you ☆ genre: dark fantasy, little red riding hood au, werewolf au, horror ☆ warnings: blood, violence and characters’ death ☆ summary: the classic story of a girl who pays a visit to her grandma in her red cloak with an itsy-bitsy twist in roles a.k.a. the big bad wolf isn’t that scary anymore ☆ words: 7,1k ☆ also: massive thank you to @dat-town​ for the proofreading. the fact that you take your time to check my grammar before i make a post here always puts my heart at ease ♥ but i guess, it’s something you’ve already known

Working on a pair of mesmerizing eyes, your knuckles turned white around the chalk before they became just as black as the depth of those galaxies that you desperately tried to blend into your best friend’s fiery gaze without success. Although, you spent most of your free time with the boy from the neighbouring cottage - wandering in the woods before sunrise and collecting berries and mushrooms for your families even when neither of your mothers asked for it in advance -, somehow your drawings of him had never turned out to be as good as your portraits of your father or the sketches that you made of smaller animals like the cute rabbits you had caught red-handed two weeks ago, munching on the carrots in your garden. Yet, your dissatisfaction couldn’t hold you back from trying as you were currently working on the sixth picture of Jungkook, each one of them less dreamy than the previous one. If only, you could have captured those indecipherable emotions you had seen in his eyes last night when he told you that he would miss you like crazy when his family left the town due to the latest animal attacks, your drawing could have ended up being one of your best works so far. But as your gaze settled on the sharp lines close to his eyebrow, the boy stared back at you lifeless which slowly drove you crazy. You could do so much better than this!

Deep in your thoughts, you wondered whether you should have asked him to stay while you still had the chance to talk to him but before you could have come to a conclusion, your sister stormed into the kitchen and knocked the thoughts out of your head. Curious as ever, you bit into your lower lip and held back your breath, watching as your mother took a tiny sip from the soup on the oven then added a pinch of salt to the dish, seemingly unbothered.

‘Mother! I was wondering whether I could pay a visit to grandma…’ your sister started with a sly smile in the corner of her mouth, her long, brown hair falling into her face, making her unfairly beautiful. Looking at her, you had the urge to paint her figure in pastel brown and red as dark as rose petals soaked in the storm. But you knew better than to try and convince her to stay put for at least until you could have made sketches of her. She had never understood why you liked drawing so much when you could have spent your time with actual people instead of recalling their features on your own, hiding behind your parchments, slim fingers smudged from the colourful chalks that your father bought each year for your birthday since you had turned fourteen. In her eyes, you were a joke of a lady, too clumsy and dirty while for the rest of your family, you were neither strong or fast enough to accompany your father and the men in the town for the hunt in spring or before the rainy season in fall. 

‘It’s too late, Irene. What’s so urgent that cannot wait until tomorrow?’ your mother asked, one of her bushy brows arching under the weight of her question. She seemed skeptical and as far as you could tell, she had every reason for having doubts because your sister was quite the opposite of you which meant that she would have rather not had meat for months than to go out to the wild after sunset. There was no way Irene would have willingly walked past the forest at night just to see your grandma.

Yet, she dared to claim otherwise.

‘I haven’t seen her in ages,’ your sister said with a pseudo-innocent pout that made both you and your mother chuckle much to her displeasure. The way those turquoise and plump, azure veins became more and more visible on her neck and temple was a sight to behold, something that in your humble opinion was worthy of being turned into a masterpiece.

‘And I’m a mother of two mischievous girls for more than two decades, darling,’ your mother said with a proud huff that could have made it obvious for anyone that she didn’t really mind either of your antics. She might have complained about the white locks in her hair on rainy days, blaming them on you within a blink of an eye but she loved you dearly and would have done anything for her family. ‘You either tell me the truth or you can grab those plates instead of lying and set the table for dinner,’ she said with authority in her voice before she pointed at the porcelain in the cabinet.

Irene rolled her eyes and let out an exaggerated breather as she took a seat by the table on the opposite side from you. As clear as day, she stood no chance against your mother, she should have learned it by now.

‘Fine. As you know, mother, tomorrow is my first midwinter as a legal adult which means, I can finally attend the dance at the bonfire. I need the white dress from grandma,’ she said and Irene’s argument made you frown, reminding you of the shallow tradition of your village that you dreaded more than the woods.

Legends said that those who stayed up all night, dancing around the flames during their first midwinter despite the unforgiving cold, would share an equally long and happy life together in their marriage regardless of the obstacles that life might have put in their way. And while it sounded lovely, charming even, what they did not say was the fact that at the fragile age of twenty people shouldn’t have made such rushed decisions, choosing a significant other based on their stamina. It sounded stupid and utterly irrational. And you would have rather not gotten married in the first place than to be forced to do so due to a fun night under the stars. Because the truth was: people were watching and they didn’t forget easily. If the sage of your village was sure that faith pushed you towards your destined lover, you had no other choice but to bear his children and serve the community, giving them warriors who could protect its people or little girls who could have been able to do better in the future than their mothers. It was utter madness.

‘You can ask her to give it to you tomorrow, too,’ your mother reminded Irene with a frown, not at all satisfied with her argument that made the corner of your clenched mouth twitch in satisfaction. Not because you didn’t want your sister to get what she wanted but because the fact that she wasn’t fond of the midwinter dance either made you feel her closer to your heart. It might have been due to the fact that she was indeed a mother of two girls but she had never pressured you with marriage. She might have been lucky enough to fall for her husband with time yet she knew that it was rather rare in your community. It usually happened on the other way around, couples falling out of love and leading a mediocre life with more compromises than they should have.

‘Please. It’s really important to me! You know, how much I…’ Irene kept pushing and you quickly shifted your gaze back to your drawing of Jungkook to hide how wary you got due to the tone she used, most probably on purpose. She must have been really desperate to get her hands on that dress as soon as possible if she was willing to play the guilt card so openly.

You could hear it clearly when your mother made up her mind. She put the wooden spoon on the counter beside the oven with a loud sigh and turned around, the crack of the floor giving the tentative motion away.

‘On one condition,’ she stated while you grabbed the tinted chalk again and gave another try for your drawing of your best friend. Maybe, if you had used ash or dark grey with a pinch of white for his pupils instead of coal black, those endless galaxies would have come alive. ‘You will take your sister with you,’ your mother said, not accepting no as an answer as she pointed at your stiff figure from across your small kitchen slash dining room and you needed to realize that the size of your cottage had never ever felt so suffocating before.

‘What? Why?’ you asked, eyes fixated on the woman and while you didn’t intend to sound disrespectful, you couldn’t have helped the huff that escaped your mouth. On most days, you had nothing against the woods neither against your grandma whom you loved dearly. But it sounded pretty unfair to you that you needed to leave your pleasantly warm home for a lame dress that represented everything that you hated in your culture. Not to mention that the Sun had already set which meant that the temperature must have dropped far below zero.

‘You’re good with arrows. It would ease my heart,’ your mother stated without hesitation and the proud smile that stretched from one ear to another on her face tugged on your stomach. She sure knew how to convince you within a blink of an eye, praising your skills that no one wanted to acknowledge in your community. And why would they have wanted to? You were just as pretty as your sister if not even more beautiful with your barely visible freckles under your dark, brown eyes. You didn’t need to be a good archer, too.

‘Mother!’ Irene yelped, fuming with something akin to rage even though not quite. At second glance, she seemed rather helpless or irritated than angry. Which made not just you but your mother suspicious as well.

‘You either go together or both of you stay here, Irene,’ the woman said before she turned her back on her displeased daughter and walked towards the cabinet without further discussion. You were quick to offer her a helping hand with the porcelain, a little disappointed that you wouldn’t be able to have dinner with her and your father at the table. 

She ruffled your messy locks as if she knew.

‘Splendid!’ your sister let out an exaggerated sigh while her gaze loitered over your figure, index finger pointing at the small pile of papers and your colourful chalks on the dining table. ‘Speed up, dummy,’ she urged you, giving you no more than five minutes to get ready for the walk. Seriously, her bossy attitude could rub you the wrong way effortlessly.

You were right about the cold. It was unforgiving, biting into your cheeks and pinching your nose despite the woolly scarf around your swan neck and the green cloak atop your warm clothes. It was close to unbearable but at least the woods greeted you with familiarity. And all the sweet memories that you shared with Jungkook under the now leafless branches managed to take your mind off the fact that you had let yourself be tricked into this trip with a few silly compliments. You should have at least asked for some kind of compensation. Because taking Irene’s desperation, you were almost a hundred percent certain that you could have convinced her to do the dishes for an entire month in exchange for your sacrifice. What a stupid lass you were for not thinking sooner! Now, chance out of reach, the only thing you could have done was crying over spilled milk.

‘Are you looking for someone?’ you asked the girl on your right when you noticed that her eyes were scanning the area feverishly as if she had been on a hunt. If you hadn’t known any better, you would have thought that she was scared of something.

‘Just walk,’ she scoffed, shushing you with her hands to keep your gaze on the path ahead of you instead of getting on her nerves which you did without a complaint. It wasn’t as if you had suddenly wanted to get sentimental with your sister in the middle of the woods like when you had been kids, sleeping in the same bed on rainy nights, whispering each other’s ears off while hiding from the monsters under your blanket.

‘As if it was my idea!’ you retorted, a tad bit hurt because of her obvious displeasure. It made you think that you had done something wrong when despite your childish arguments you always tried to be as good to your sister as possible. After all, she had been the one who had let you dress into her clothes when you had been in your curious phase, the one whom you could have turned to when your heart had broken for the first time because of Kim Taehyung and also the one who had given you her leftover food for long weeks last summer due to her stupid diet.

Not understanding the sudden malevolence, you decided to shut the girl out entirely, allowing yourself to act sulky for once as people your age. You walked faster than Irene on purpose, forcing your brain to stop coming up with excuses for her as you were reminiscing about the first spring that you had spent in the forest, playing hide and seek with Jungkook. It was a nice memory that soon sucked you in entirely, allowing the pair of yellow eyes that followed each one of your steps to remain unnoticed.

You had no idea how long you had been striding forwards in silence but it became painfully obvious when the bubble you had created around yourself bursted out due to an eerie scream too familiar to not freeze your blood on the spot. Your blown eyes widened in fear before you snapped your head towards the noise and processing the absence of your sister, your limbs moved on automatic. You ran as fast as you could, delicate fingers curling around the bow’s grip, arrow already on the string.

Your lungs were on fire by the time you found Irene, knuckles red because of the unforgiving cold. She was sitting on her heels beside a trunk, beige skirt as crimson as her cloak.

‘What the hell!’ you breathed in disbelief when your eyes settled on the small pond of blood in front of the girl and the unmoving animal that laid in the middle of it. It was a wolf, much bigger than the average size, at least compared to what people were used to in this forest. Yet, for some reason - maybe because it was in such a vulnerable state, basically half-dead - your scaredy-cat sister didn’t seem to be afraid of it. Instead, she looked rather sorrowful.

It happened when your sister slowly turned her head in your direction. The wolf moved and you aimed at it without hesitation, almost piercing a carved arrow through Irene’s heart when she jumped between you and the wounded animal. It was absurd, her putting her life on the line for a predator that could have bitten her throat in any minute but you had no spare energy to question her actions. You used it all for preventing a murder, fingers holding onto the nock in despair.

‘Put that freaking arrow down! Don’t you see that he is hurt?’ Irene screamed at you and your shoulders tensed due to her harsh tone. You couldn’t understand why she was acting so out of character or why she talked about the wolf as if it had been someone precious to her heart. As far as you knew, she despised animals because they were dirty and knew no manners as if she had lived in a fantasy world where hummingbirds did people’s hair in the morning and dogs opened the door for everyone who was in a hurry. Your sister could have had such weird misconceptions sometimes, you were honestly worried that she might have ended up selling her soul to the devil because of her naivety.

Furrowing your brows, you craned forwards to be able to take a good look at the animal but what your eyes found was a naked body, lilac lips and torn flesh soaked in blood. The horrific sight tugged on your stomach.

‘Who is this?’ you asked, your brows knitted together in confusion and dread. You didn’t like the feeling of your mind paying a trick on you. But if it hadn’t been your last brain cell giving up on functioning because of the cold then it would have meant that the boy in the base of the maple tree was able to transform into a big ass wolf that was just a bunch of crap, right? It sounded like one of those stories, your grandmother had liked to tell you when you had been four and impossible to put in bed without a fairytale.

‘It’s not your business,’ Irene spat and in sync with her claim, a painful moan slipped past the naked boy’s clenched lips. The girl turned towards him in a heartbeat, wrapping her red cloak around his body as if a cloth that thin could have kept him warm.

Her indifference of you rubbed you the wrong way, boiling your blood until you eventually didn’t feel the icy air against your cheeks.

‘Oh hell it is! He’s a freaking wolf,’ you pointed out the obvious, voice pitched and alarming even though you did let the bow fall back by your side. To channel your anger into something harmless, you clenched your fingers around the lower limb and let your short nails dug small crescents into the palm of your empty hand. It felt gross due to the thin layer of sweat.

Irene helped the boy sit up and find his balance as she leaned his back against the tree but all you could concentrate on was the desperation in your sister’s voice the next time she spoke up. You had never heard her so scared in your life though she had shared a room with you when you had been younger and she could have gotten quite hysterical whenever she had spotted a spider on the ceiling close to her bed.

‘You can’t tell it to anyone, understand?’ she asked although her question sounded more like a command. It sent an unpleasant shiver down your spine.

‘Are you…’ nuts was what stuck on the tip of your tongue when Irene raised her voice, angry at you and seemingly at the rest of the world as well. It made you feel small and forced you to make up your mind regardless of your morals. Because no matter what your sister thought of this boy, it didn’t change the facts: he was dangerous and for you, your loved ones came first. He might have looked like a human being, he might have bleeded like a human being but he was still a part wolf. And wolves were born to feed on their prey.

‘Give me your word!’ your sister begged and you gulped down the bitter know in your throat, slowly, tentatively sliding the arrow back into its container on your back.

If you had been just a bit more honest with yourself, you would have acknowledged the eerie feeling that had sat on your chest the moment your eyes had settled on the ugly wound on the unfamiliar boy’s side but it was easier to comfort your sister and act as if everything had been alright when you eventually suppressed your own instincts. While a part of you was sure that you couldn’t have saved the wolf’s life even if you had rushed back to your cottage instead of heading to your grandma’s home, you didn’t have the heart to break the inevitable down to Irene especially because you were aware of how she would have reacted. She would have told you that you secretly hoped that he would die and you couldn’t have denied it without feeling out of place. You weren’t fond of lies, not even white ones.

So when you made a promise, you truly meant to take their secret to your grave.

‘Fine, you have my word. But you need to give me an explanation,’ you claimed with a snort and when she nodded, you put your bow away and made the short distance between the two of you disappear, kneeling beside the half-dead body.

While you tried your best to treat the boy’s cut that was definitely too deep to be caused by an accident, you listened to Irene’s lengthy explanation, brows knitted in concern. But how were you supposed to not worry when she basically confessed to you that she had been meeting this boy for months now and that they had been supposed to do the same tonight as well if she could have come up with a more believable excuse that would have allowed her to enter the forest on her own. Stating that you were fuming with rage even when she had enlightened you on the fact that he had saved her life once when she had been collecting berries would have been an understatement but at least your anger kept you warm after lacking of a better idea you had torn your cloak to pieces to stop the heavy bleeding. Hah! So she had known about his kind and she had refused to warn the village. Why would anyone do that in the first place? Didn’t she know that wolves were predators? Jin might have been nothing but kind to her but what was about the rest of them? After all, wolves lived in packs.

‘Can you hear me?’ you tried to pull the boy back to consciousness with a simple question while gathering some useful information on his attacker in the meantime. It might have done good to your slightly shaking hands if you could have prepared for the danger that lurked in the shadows. Because if there was anything you were still certain of, it was this: whatever had torn a piece out of Jin’s body, it had done so not that long ago and had known no mercy. ‘Can you tell me what has happened to you? Who did this?’

The wolf boy opened his eyes and it scared you how lifeless his dark brown orbs looked like. As if he had already accepted his fate and had only come back to you to steal a glance at the soundlessly sobbing Irene on your right. As if you hadn’t even been there, Jin’s gaze focused solely on your sister. It churned your heart, truly. Although the second he shook his head as a no, dread took over your body leaving no space for pity.

‘I don… don’t remember,’ he said, his trembling hand reaching out to Irene but falling onto the cold ground a moment later. However, wiping a warm teardrop away, she took it into hers almost as soon as it touched the grass, lifting it in front of her bitten lips to kiss the pain away. ‘It was too fast,’ he explained weakly, pushing your mind to overdrive.

Because if what Jin had said was true, there was something in the forest that was faster than a freaking werewolf. How were you supposed to protect your sister against a beast like that? You might have been an excellent archer but you weren’t quick nor strong enough to take a creature like that down on your own. Which meant that you had only one option left: you needed to get the hell out of the woods immediately.

But Irene was a stubborn mull, unable to see the obvious therefore she refused to leave the wounded boy behind, claiming that Jin would have found a way to save you all if he had been in your shoes. But the truth was, he wasn’t. Because the wolf boy had already faced the beast and he had lost.

In the midst of trying to persuade your sister to let go of the boy’s lifeless hand and treating his nasty wound, the forest got darker and soon the range of your eyesight became less than eight metres that was ridiculous. Where was the starlit sky when you needed it the most? The Moon that could have guided you home safely? You missed the reassuring feeling of comfort that the forest had given you whenever you wandered around the trees with your best friend. You missed Jungkook whose smile could pacify your jittery heart even when you were forced to make a presentation in front of your entire class in school or when you two had found a stray rabbit in one of your father’s trap and you had thought that the noises coming from the bush had been a fox.

As if on cue, your shoulders tensed when something stirred in one of the nearby, leafless bushes and your anxiety didn’t go unnoticed as Jin’s eyes widened due to the pain that your nails caused them when they dug into his flesh on instinct. Shifting your gaze back at the boy, the apology stuck in your throat when Irene swatted your hand away.

‘Don’t worry, I can still protect you both,’ he tried his best to sound convincing and while his voice indeed radiated confidence, the corner of his mouth twitched in pain as if his body had wanted to protest, giving away his misery. You saw right through his lies.

‘Don’t kid yourself. It will be a miracle if you survive the night,’ you spat bitterly, praying for all the deities that could have heard you that your sister would have finally understood that it was over for the wolf. Because unlike in the tales that your grandma had told you when you had been a child, in reality Jin’s scar didn’t seem to heal super fast and while you couldn’t have been sure whether it was due to something in the wound, on the fanglike weapon he had been attacked with or simply because of his genetics, you couldn’t afford to waste more time on questioning a half-unconscious hybrid.

Hearing your harsh tone, Irene sent a deadly glance in your direction but at that point, you couldn’t have cared less about her irrational behaviour. You made sure that the knot was tight around the boy’s rough bandage then stood up and urged your sister to do the same since out of the two of them she was your responsibility. 

‘We need to take him home,’ you stated, not taking no as an answer, teeth digging deep into your lower lip as you bent your knees and slid your arm under Jin’s. He was heavier than he looked like but the fact that he had thick muscles under Irene’s cloak didn’t faze you. Or at least not to the extent to freeze your limbs. Because if it hadn’t been obvious, you didn’t have spare time to ponder over trivial things like how tall the wolf boy was when he finally put his weight on his feet or how good-looking he could have been with a little colour on his cheeks.

You were about to break it down to Irene that you couldn’t have carried her lover all the way to your cottage when the girl shook her head in panic.

‘We need to take him to grandma. Mother will…’ Irene wanted to protest but you cut her nonsense off with a furious, animalistic groan, right shoulder already aching from the boy’s heavy weight. It didn’t help your mood either that your fingers also started to get numb due to the cold. If she had been worried about the well-deserved scolding, she had been more dense than you had ever assumed. Couldn’t have she seen how serious the situation was? That wolf boy could have died for real if you had needed to drag him all the way to your grandma’s home? Even with Irene’s help, that could have taken you an hour.

‘Could you please listen to me at least this once? He won’t make it that far,’ you screamed in frustration, a bit louder than you should have done so. But it had already been too late for and no use in crying over something that you couldn’t have changed.

Angry at yourself - and mostly at your sister - you balled up your fist that rested on Jin’s side and looked around with narrowed eyes, hoping that you could have noticed the beast in time before it would have torn you apart. With each moment, you debated with yourself, too, just like your sister but while she couldn’t have decided whether she had been more afraid of your mother’s rage than the possibility of losing Jin who had survived a nasty fight against a black bear when he had saved her life, you contemplated whether your actions could have talked louder than your words and whether Irene would have simply followed you if you had taken the first steps towards your home.

In the end, it was your sister who made her decision faster, bending her knees and leaning the wolf boy’s arm on her shoulder so that she could have taken a part of your burden. It allured a relieved sigh out of your throat. Finally, you were about to head somewhere. Somewhere far from the crimson pot of blood under your boots.

Shooting a partly grateful, partly encouraging smile towards the girl, you pointed at the path that was supposed to lead you back to your cottage, silently praying that you were right about the direction in spite of the growing dark and that your senses didn’t pull a cruel joke on you in such a critical situation. If you had gotten lost in the woods with a dying werewolf on your shoulder, it would have scarred you for the rest of your life. Taking that you both survived the silly visit to your grandma that had been forced on you due to Irene’s incapability to confess the truth or come up with a more thoughtful lie.

Searching for a more comfortable way of support, you shook your head, frustrated. It wasn’t too nice of you to wish that your sister would have gone to her night trip on her own. It would have been equal to wish that she would have trembled in fear all alone. And then what would have told you apart from the monster lurking in the woods? You were just scared, irritated, cold and a tad bit hungry after being forced to delay dinner.

You were about to take your first steps towards your cottage when the unmistaken sound of a branch’s creak reached your ears and rendered you midmotion. Your hand that rested on Jin’s arm reached out for your bow on instinct but you couldn’t grab neither of the arrows in the container that hung from your shoulder without letting go of his waist, too, which made your sister scream out in pain due to the extra weight on her body.

‘Are you okay, children?’ a deep voice asked you from behind a tree and you took notice of the sharp blade in the man’s right hand sooner than his face. He looked slightly familiar but you couldn’t have pinpointed where you had seen him before or with whom you mistook his strong features. So you gulped, shamelessly relieved when he finally slid his weapon onto his belt, next to a bunch of other deadly tools under his black cloak. He must have been a hunter. Someone who could have defeated - and might have been actually after - the beast that had nearly killed Jin. It felt both logical and too good to be true at that moment.

‘We are fine but our friend has been attacked by a…’ your voice cracked when you realized how suspiciously specific it would have sounded if you had said that by a beast with claws or  fangs that could poison a shapeshifter. A creature that had only existed in told tales whispered by the elders of your community. ‘A wild animal. We need to take him back home,’ you came up with a hopefully believable lie while you took a part of the burden that weighed down on your sister. If you’d had even an ounce of spare energy, you would have cracked a silly smile when Irene mumbled your name with annoyed gratitude. Because it was uncharacteristically nice of her to prefer that to dummy. 

‘Did you see where it ran? The wolf,’ the hunter asked and you furrowed your brows at his eagerness. Even though you were nowhere near as good at reading the signs as your father or his mates, you honestly doubted that what had attacked your sister’s friend had been a wolf. It should have been much bigger to be able to tear the boy’s flesh apart from above.

‘No, we didn’t see it,’ you said with pseudo-confidence, your buzzing blood turning you deaf when the man’s gaze fell upon you. His chocolate brown eyes loitered over your figure from your head to your toes with amusement before they settled on your hand that gave support to Jin. You didn’t like the idea of him noticing the wolf boy’s rough bangade but it would have been more suspicious if you had tried to hide it with your own body. You were small and Jin had been in nothing but a dirty cloak and a woolly scarf wrapped around his middle.

There was a thick layer of sweat forming on both of your palms when the hunter nodded and shot a gentle smile at all three of you, his rotten front teeth sending an unpleasant chill down your spine. You wondered whether it was solely due to his appearance that you were wary of him or it was because he radiated danger. Could it have been foolish of you to trust Jin more just because he was injured and his fairly good-looking face had charmed your sister? What if he had been the wolf this man was looking for because the boy was dangerous for your kind? If your father had encountered a stray wolf this close to your village, he would have killed him, too, without feeling any kind of remorse. So wasn’t it unfair of you to look at the hunter as the enemy?

‘Good,’ the man said, his smile fading into a subtle one before he took a step aside. You said thank you for his action with a polite nod, dragging Jin’s body forwards. ‘Do you want me to help you carry him?’ he asked when you reached his side, already panting a little and while it would have been definitely a big help if he had accompanied you to your cottage, you did not intend to take the risk. Hence before your sister could have made the final decision on your behalf, choosing comfort over safety, you spoke up and shook your head.

‘Not necessary but thank you for your kindness, sir. We appreciate it,’ you reassured the man with a friendly smile then bid your goodbye and tugged on Irene’s clothes to force her to do the same. 

Although your mind was screaming at you to speed up your steps, you didn’t do so until you were certain that the hunter couldn’t see you anymore. So only when the leafless trees finally hid you from the man, you urged your sister to push aside the stinging pain in her limbs and run as fast as she could with half of Jin’s weight on her shoulder. You just wanted to be at home, working on your lame excuse of portrait before falling asleep by the kitchen table, a warm blanket laid on your figure by your mother shielding you from the cold.

‘Why did you…’ Irene started but you didn’t let her waste her energy on useless questions.

‘Just go!’ you cut her off sharply, your wary eyes begging her to once in her life not complain because it was hard. You knew that it would have been easier to accept the man’s offer but a nerve inside of you hated the idea of him following you all the way to your home hence you had made your decision. And you needed your big sister to accept it and support you or else you might have broken down under the weight of the miserable things that had happened and might have still awaited you on that starless night. You started to get paranoid.

The truth was, you didn’t want to scare Irene with your conspiracy theories since the hunter had let you go freely and you had been called a liar many times when you had been younger and had cried wolf when you shouldn’t have rushed to make quick conclusions but you were suspicious nevertheless. And you were allowed to feel however you wanted, weren’t you? It didn’t hurt anyone until you kept these thoughts solely to yourself. Like how you couldn’t have pinpointed whether you had seen this man before or not when in reality you were sure that you had been introduced to all the hunters of your community as deep down your father was especially proud of your skills despite him not wanting you near when he was on a hunt. And while he could have been a lone hunter from some other village, the chances of anyone following a prey this far on his own in the cold were low. Why would have anyone left their family…

Your heart skipped a beat when you heard the same noise of a branch breaking under heavy boots from behind your back then made up for the loss in no time as it picked up its rate, warmth running through your veins. Suddenly, you missed the wintry cold and how it bit into your skin, making sure that you knew, you were alive.

A small voice in your head told you to not look behind your back but you also knew that turning your back on a predator was more than simply foolish. You needed to see your enemy to hunt him down. So you turned your head towards the noise slowly, dread written all over your face when you found a pair of red eyes on your shaking figure. The animal kept its bloody gaze on you with its limbs frozen and didn’t move until you let go of Jin’s hand with a sigh to lift yours in front of your chest and wave, scaring the rabbit away.

You felt relief washing over your stiff body and wolf boy must have felt the same as he hissed and his tense muscles went numb the moment the hare disappeared. You turned back ahead, ready to shake him back to consciousness in case he had fallen asleep again but the scolding words stuck in your throat when your gaze settled on the fanglike blade that pierced through Jin’s heart, crimson blood drops painting the sword red before they ran down his bandage and his bare legs to reunite on the ground. The pond under your feet tugged on your stomach and made you cough up bile.

It was Irene’s scream that kept you on the surface although your legs gave up soon and you fell on your knees with wolf boy’s lifeless body on you. There was blood on your clothes and the sight of it made you sick. You were, without a doubt, paralysed by shock and you had no idea how to snap out of this useless state so that you could have a chance to save the both of you just like how you had promised to your mother.

‘You shouldn’t have chosen a monster over your own,’ the hunter spat and in any other situation you would have found it amusing how he had the guts to call Jin a monster with that animalistic grin on his face. Then and there, you feared the consequences of the smallest twitch of your lips.

You clenched your jaws and closed your eyes, screaming at your limbs to move silently, tears already brimming in the corner of them as you pushed Jin’s body off yours, crawling as far from his corpse as possible. 

‘No, no, no… please!’ your sister sat on her heels beside the boy, turning him on his back as if he had been only sleeping but the deep cut on his chest made it painfully obvious that he wouldn’t wake up anymore. No matter how desperately Irene begged him to. ‘Please, open… open your eyes!’ she asked him and while you could have seen that the hunter had already lifted his blade to gain some momentum, your throat was too dry to form any kind of sound other than the hopeless cry that tore your insides when he cut Irene’s head off with a satisfied smile on his face.

You grabbed your bow and laid an arrow on the string, aiming at the murderer but your hands were shaking with fear and anger hence you missed your target with an impossible distance despite him standing barely two or three metres from you.

The man laughed. It wasn’t an ugly laugh as you would have assumed but a pleasant one that could have made you feel safe if he hadn’t turned towards you with his entire body, wiping your sister’s blood into his black cloak with practiced ease. He pitied you, you could tell. But it didn’t hold you back from giving your aim another try.

You missed his head with a whole inch. And he grabbed you by your neck, lifting you off the ground. The bow fell out of your hand.

‘Those who hide these monsters deserve to die like one of them,’ he said and without telling you more, a better reason why you deserved to die, he pushed his blade through your flesh and organs, throwing your dying body farther from your sister’s as if he had seeked joy in your misery. Some sort of salvation that he couldn’t have gotten. Not like this. Never like this.

But it didn’t keep the hunter from heading towards a direction unknown to him. The direction that your fading eyes settled on without you realizing it. To pay a visit to anyone whom he would find in the cottage where your mother was worried sick, waiting for her mischievous daughters to come back home.

She should have known better than to open the door for a stranger in the middle of the night.

the end.

[iwillbeinmynest]

Home Is You - Cop!Clint x Reader (f)  Part 1/2

Author’s Note: I wanted to do some drabbles so I can break this writer’s block so, I asked @itsanerdlife for a sentence and a character. ....and now I have a two part fic. lol! so much for a drabble But THANK YOU Ama for helping me out and throwing this at me! And for this gorgeous mood board! 

 Also, I haven’t written for Clint in forever so I feel rusty but whatever, I’m posting anyways.

Prompt: “You feel like home to me and that’s why I love you.”

Word Count: 1.6K

Notes/Warnings: for Part 1: Fluff, like loads of it, stress, worry, kissing, mentions of guns, I think thats it. 

Masterlist

  You’d just gotten back from the pool and finished your shower when you heard the click of your hotel room door unlocking.

In nothing but your towel and with your hair dripping wet, you grabbed the handgun from the bathroom counter and pointed it at the floor as you crept to the edge of the short hallway.

You let out a sigh when you recognized his dirty blonde hair and hearing aid.

“Good Lord, Clint. You scared the life outta me!” You fussed at him.

He smirked when he noticed the Sig still in your hand. “At least you grabbed it.”

You smiled and placed it on the bedside table, returning to the bathroom to dry your hair and slip on a t-shirt. “You told me to.”

Clint kicked off his boots and tossed his keys on the desk across from the large queen bed. He pulled his gun from where it sat concealed under his shirt on his hip and placed it on the bedside table. Then, he pulled his badge off his belt and tossed it there, too.

He walked to the bathroom and stood in the doorway with his arms crossed.

When you flipped your head back up, from blow drying it upside down, you were surprised to see him standing there watching you with a smile. “What?” You grinned and your cheeks flushed under his gaze.

He shrugged and shook his head. “Nothin’ just…” He circled his fingers around his face and then pointed at you, signing ‘You’re beautiful.’

You put the dryer down and signed back, ‘You okay?’

He nodded and stepped up to you, pulling you into his arms. “I’m fine.” He said, It was just a long day.

“Does your CO know you’re not staying in the hotel he reserved for you?”

“Of course not,” He chuckled. “Telling your wife where you’re traveling on a case, which she’s not supposed to know about, setting her up in a fancy four star resort and then staying with her when the department is already paying for a motel room, isn’t exactly protocol. Pretty sure I’d be stuck doing the paperwork for my whole unit if he found out.”

You squeezed his waist tighter and chuckled. “Yeah, Good thing you’re an undercover. You’re already great at lying.”

You felt the rumble of a silent laugh in his chest. When you looked at him through the mirror though, you saw something ghost across his expression. It worried you and you pulled back.

“Baby,” You stated.

He shook his head and tried to cover up the wear his day had had on him. But for some reason, around you, he just couldn’t lie. “I’m fine. Just a long day is all.”

You knew the general theme of this case, drugs and muleing but he didn’t tell you the details of what he was seeing just that he had to play the bad guy to catch the bad guys. You were sure he was seeing terrible things and keeping it from you to protect you.

“You wanna get a shower and then we can order room service, maybe pizza?” You offered as a change in subject.

He turned to you and smiled, “Yeah, baby, that’d be nice.”

You smiled back, fighting the urge for him to unload on you. You knew you could handle it and you knew if he bottled up all he was dealing with, one day he’d break.

You closed the bathroom door and left him to his thoughts.

A few minutes later he emerged clean and relaxed, or at least that’s the face he put on for you.

You ordered room service and he found a movie to rent. After your movie the two of you just layed in the bed and listened to music as the sun painted the sky in pastels before the stars came out. You watched the sun set out over the Miami beach and were thankful to be on the fourth floor where you could leave the balcony doors open to feel the breeze and smell the salt air.

Suddenly, Clint wrapped his arms around you and rested his head on your stomach. He sighed into your shirt and you placed a hand at the back of his head.

“What are you thinking about?” You asked vaguely. If he wanted to tell you about work he would. No need to pressure him.

He looked up and smiled softly, “I’m just glad to be home, is all.”

“But we’re not even in our state, babe.”

He shook his head and crawled up to take your face in his hands. “Home isn’t a place, Y/N, it’s you. You feel like home to me and that’s why I love you. My job, all the things I see everyday… sometimes it’s hard and sometimes I don’t do too good a job leaving my work at the door…”

You inhaled to argue that he didn’t have to do that but his thumb caught your lips and he shook his head.

“I’m just sayin’,” He continued. “None of it lasts because the second I see you, it all starts to fade away.”

And then he looked at you in a way that made you melt. The kind of way that told you he meant everything he said.

Before he could explain further, you leaned up and caught his lips with yours. You hadn’t meant for the kiss to be so desperate but it was. You were desperate for him, desperate that he’d come home safe every night and desperate for him to be happy.

* * * * * *

The next morning, you woke when Clint turned on the bathroom light. He was getting ready to leave. You looked at the clock. 5:25.  You rolled over and pulled the covers higher.

When clint came back out, you heard him shuffle around as he got dressed.

“Just gonna leave without sayin’ bye?” You teased lazily.

He smiled at you over his shoulder as he put on his socks. “I was gonna let you sleep.”

You crawled over and laid down beside where he was sitting. You both stayed silent while he tied his boots up.

“You should call in sick.” You said with eyes closed, too tired to pretend you were anything but.

You felt a hand on your head. “I really wish I could, babe. Believe me, I want nothing more than to stay in bed with you and lounge around the pool all day but then I’d get busted.” He let out a heavy sigh. “I gotta go back to the motel before wake up call. Steve insists on riding in with me.”

“What are you going to be doing today?”

There was a pause as he tried to think of a way to tell you as vaguely as possible. “I’m uh, I have to go and…”

You put a hand on his wrist. “Nevermind, babe.”

“I don’t want you knowin’-”

“Shh,” You said lazily. “Don’t need to explain. It’s fine.”

He leaned down and kissed your temple. “I love you, I’ll see you tonight. Don’t go looking too good at the pool and definitely don’t talk to any guys.”

You scrunched your nose. “But they always compliment my...outfit.” You smirked and crawled back up to your pillow. “I promise, baby, no boys.” You plopped down on the white sheeted mattress and settled back in. “Love you.”

“Love you.” And clint was out the door.

He took a cab back to his motel, a dingey spot far from the beach and very clearly on the same side of town as his work. Low income homes with gangs runnin’ the streets. This was the work he didn’t want Y/N to see. She deserved the luxury like what she was getting at that resort on the water. Sure, back home they didn’t live like kings but he tried to spoil her every once in a while. He figured it helped make up for being married to a train wreck like him.

He slipped into his very worn, very small room and groaned. This place was nasty compared to Y/N’s room. He went to the bathroom and washed his face again to try and get the tired to fade.

He made a cup of coffee and frowned at the taste, “Aww, coffee…”

Before he made it to the sink to pour it out a knock came at the door.

Clint looked to the clock. Exactly 6:15. He rolled his eyes and opened the door.

“Mornin’ sunshine.”  Steve smirked.

Clint groaned. “Is the coffee better in your room? It’s garbage in here.”

“You should have grabbed a cup at Y/N’s hotel.”

Clint froze. He turned to Steve who was thoroughly enjoying calling Clint out.

“Does Chief know?” Clint asked, there was no use denying it to his partner but the Chief knowing was important.

“Not yet.”

“How long have you known?”

Steve snorted. “Since the second day out here. I came to pick you up and the bed was made. I knew right then.”

Clint hung his head, rookie mistake. He swore under his breath. “Look, don’t tell the Chief. I wasn’t planning on seeing her. I just wanted to keep tabs on her and spoil her a bit. But… come on, it’s Y/N.”

“Your wife is gorgeous.”

Clint looked at him hard.

Steve threw his hands up. “It’s a fact. I’m not implying anything else.”

“You better not be.”

“Come on, man. I would never. She’s my best friend.”

Clint frowned and picked up his backpack from the dining table. “I’m her bestest friend.” He mumbled.

Seve rolled his eyes and opened the door. “You’re an idiot when it comes to her. Let’s get you coffee.”

*   *   *   *

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[dandelionflower]

A speck of foam

So I saw @miraculous-of-salt s Eden AU and I was struck with the overwhelming urge to add some felinette

So here we go!

................

Most people believe that one of the most illusive cities in the world, Eden, has been given its name because of its strict control over tourism and visitors, like the famous forbidden garden. In reality it’s because Eden is the most environmentally friendly city in the world.

Those who visit report seeing trees growing through the roofs of houses, and the roads made of naturally mined rock.

Bridgette Cheng, mayor of Eden, states, on the eco friendly nature of her city, “It’s not that much of a big deal, we’re a small city, we can afford to build around nature.”

And build around nature, they have, most houses are described as having “vines for walls” and “the brightest paint jobs imaginable.”

Marinette puffed air from her nose, a hanging fern tickling her cheek. She was hidden against the peach toned walls of her aunt Bridgette’s home.

She had come to visit for the summer after “The great betrayal” as she called it.

During multicultural week at school, her aunt had came to tell the class all about Eden. Lila, however, highjacked their attention before she got the chance. She fed them all sorts of lies under the blanket lie of “I volunteered there once, for a whole year.” Not only were they lies, but her spiel was coated in all sorts of slurs.

The whole class, except herself, Nino, Chloe, and Sabrina, failed the test entirely. They were being held back until they could pass it.

Most of the class, she knew, were studying all they could about it so they could move up before the summer was over. She had high hopes for them and was willing to do all she could to guide them in their studying.

She sighed from behind the cool green vines. Alya was struggling, though, she couldn’t separate Lila’s lies from reality.

Marinette stifled a giggle as her father walked out with twigs in his hair from the giant tree.

“Marinette?” He yelled, looking helplessly at the walls.

She puffed through her nose again, shrinking further into the wall, feeling like a child again.

Growing up she would hide in the vines often, and her dad, tall as he may be, could never find her. She would stay in the vines for as long as she could, until Tom threatened her with-

“Okay... if I can’t find you, I guess you can stay there. And miss the trip to the town square with your aunt.” As he turned around, Marinette launched herself at him.

“No! No, I want to come!”

“Then go get ready, you’re going to be there for a while.”

Eden is spectacular for another reason; the citizens’ midnight blue hair. It’s a spectacular genetic disorder that causes their hair to fade to blue in the sunlight. After five minutes in the sun, the exposed strands will be blue permanently.

The disorder is passed on, generation to generation. Every child with even a hint of Eden in them will be born with the blue hair. This is one of the ways Eden identifies outsiders.

Another such way is clothing. All of Eden’s citizens dress themselves in bright, bold colors. Outsiders, particularly ones not directly related by marriage, will wear varied shades of grey.

Often times in-laws and cousins will have to wear the greys, as they aren’t married to a Eden citizen. Diplomats and reporters will also be found dressed in grey.

Marinette could barely contain herself as her eyes drifted over the seas of deep blue hair around her.

Back in Paris, she had always been viewed as strange by people, even her friends. Chloe had tried targeting her hair color but that was stamped out immediately by the administration.

Her eyes snagged on a small dot of white, stationary in the flowing crowd. A speck of foam in her perfect blue sea.

As she moved forwards with her aunt, she noticed the speck of foam was a boy, not much older than her. He had a grey vest and tie on, paired with a white dress shirt and dark grey slacks.

He was looking around helplessly, likely trying to find a sense of where he was.

“Aunt Bridgette?” Her aunt looked down at her. “Can I go help him and catch up with you later?”

Bridgette smiled and nodded, passing Marrinette two all access passes. “Remember, I have a jury trial at two-thirty, so if you get there around then, just wait in my office.”

Marinette grinned and skipped a towards the bewildered speck of foam.

“Hello, I’m Marinette. You look a little lost, do you need any help?”

The boy looked at her for a moment and nodded. “My name is Felix, I am rather lost. Would you mind helping me get to this address?”

He showed her a sheet of paper with an address written neatly in cursive.

Marinette thought for a moment and nodded. “Yeah, I can take you there. Come on.” She grabbed his hand and started pulling him towards the nearest tunnel.

“Wait, where are we going? What’s down there?”

“Have you been on a subway?” She looked at him, reading the panic on his face.

“Yes…”

“This is more or less the same,” she let a wicked smile grow on her face, “just more fun.”

The transportation system of Eden is unlike any others. It’s full of underground slides that travel all over Eden. There are two slide for every area, one to and one from.

The system works in such a way that a person is strapped to a cart and sent down the slide, with a cord of a certain length tied to the back.

Once the cord reaches its end, the cart stops at its destination and a winch begins to pull the cart back up the slide by its cord.

It’s just another one way Eden protects the environment while accomplishing everything other cities do.

Marinette giggled as she fiddled with Felix’s hair. “First time in the tunnels?”

He coughed and his cheeks tinted pink. “Yes... it was interesting, to say the least.”

“I remember my first time,” she remissed, “I was so tiny.”

“Forgive me for saying, but… you still are.”

“Ah!” She gasped and shoved him. “And here I thought we were friends.”

“Of course we are, my dear Marinette,” he knelt and grasped her hand, “can you ever forgive me?”

When they finally reached Eden’s justice building, Felix stopped.

Marinette turned to see tears in his eyes. “Hey... What’s wrong?”

“I just…” He took a deep breath. “This case is going to determine a good part of my future, whether I get to have a family.”

“What?”

“I don’t have parents.” He declared bluntly. “These people met me and wanted to adopt me, but Eden’s never delt with an adoption case before, they’re fighting for me.”

“Oh... Felix,” she rested her hand on his shoulder, “let’s just wait in my aunts office, you don’t have to go into that room.”

“Yes, thank you.”

Eden is known as a “the city of beauty,” because of not only the kind and giving nature of its citizens, but the natural light it uses when the sun goes down.

It’s common knowledge that Eden’s main export is gemstones. The precious rocks are integral in Eden’s native culture.

One stone that they refuse to export is called “Moonglow Stone.” It acts similar to the moon in the way it reflects light, but solely the moons light.

All of Eden’s roads are paved in Moonglow and the buildings are speckeled with its shine. When the sun goes down, the whole town is illuminated in the pale, tinted light.

Marinette walked home, arm in arm with Felix, chatting up a storm.

When Bridgette entered her office the first thing Marinette did was ask if Felix got adopted.

The minute the first letter poured from her mouth, Marinette was laughing with glee and pulling Felix, who had a rather stunned look on his face, close to her.

As it turned out, the man adopting Felix was Bridgette’s next door neighbor, Charles Culpa.

Bridgette and Charles were quite close friends and were having a calm conversation while the buildings slowly began to glow in the absence of the sun.

“Felix, look!” Marinette pointed at the Eden Spire, the center of the city. “It’s happening!”

The spire’s stones began to illuminate, starting at the bottom and making their way to the top at a snails pace.

When it was finished, the tower was a myriad of pastel shades. Marinette smiled softly, tilting her head. It felt like home again.

She felt a squeeze on her hand and looked down to see Felix’s fingers laced with hers. She felt her smile growing as she squeezed his hand back.

While Paris is the city of love, Eden and the surrounding area has been known as the place of soulmates.

“It’s not always romantic love,” an anonymous source declares, “its an unspoken bond that can be platonic as well.”

The first feeling a blue haired citizen of Eden will have when they find their bond is called “Star glitter,” which is deep seeded in old Eden mythology.

Marinette sighed, content as she stared out the window at the moon. Her letter to Nino was almost finished.

Just before she signed her name, a flash of white caught her eye. She followed it and saw Felix, rearranging his room.

He pushed the desk up to the window and sat down pulling out a notebook and sketching in it.

She felt her heart flutter as she observed the dillegent look on his face.

Nope, no, no stalking, Marinette!

She pulled down the blinds and hid her burning face in her hands. When she looked up, she saw the remnants of the glitter she was using on her newest design.

It shined like stars.

[0blivion-laughs]

Francis Bacon

https://www.artsy.net/article/artsy-editorial-francis-bacon

https://www.francis-bacon.com/artFrom a small London studio littered ankle-deep with source material, bottles of fine champagne, and a cacophony of paint splatters, Francis Bacon conjured some of the most innovative and, as art critic Robert Melville once put it, “satanically influential” paintings of the 20th century. His canvases writhe with fleshy, screaming, contorted figures, from popes and famed art-historical subjects to friends and ill-fated lovers. His searing work embodies a host of post-war cultural anxieties, as well as Bacon’s personal demons and obsessions.

But what was this mighty, enigmatic painter’s secret to creating such spellbinding imagery—and, all the while, upholding his status as king of the bon vivants? Below, we pull back the curtain on who Bacon was, what motivated his deeply affecting paintings, and why their sulfurous power won’t be fading anytime soon.

Who Was Francis Bacon?

Bacon was a complex man whose work was informed by a tangled web of intense relationships, art-historical fixations, and a fair number of vices. Born in Dublin in 1909 to a domineering father, Capt. Anthony Edward Mortimer, and his much younger wife, Christina Winifred Firth, Bacon was derided as a “weakling” and, as legend has it, horse-whipped by his father during his youth due to issues with chronic asthma. At 17, he was kicked out of the family home for good when he was discovered trying on his mother’s underwear.

Francis Bacon Three Studies for Self-Portrait, 1976 Richard Gray Gallery

But despite (or perhaps because of) his asthmatic bouts and the abuse he endured, Bacon was strong-willed and resilient, with the constitution of a bull. He drank, ate, gambled, loved, and painted with such voraciousness that he rarely had time for sleep; two to three hours a night was typical. Through this haze of debauchery and hard living, and bolstered by deep friendships and aesthetic obsessions, Bacon produced a cascade of paintings that were not only disturbingly beautiful, but also boldly original. His shocking work galvanized the group of painters surrounding him in mid-century London (the “School of London”) and eventually influenced several generations of artists to come, includingDamien Hirst, Jenny Saville, and Jake and Dinos Chapman, to name just a few. What Inspired Him? After Bacon was jettisoned from his family home, he embarked on a series of European escapades that opened his eyes to art and design, not to mention other earthly pleasures, like sex and wine. Several works he encountered during his travels made a lasting impact on his work and wouldn’t leave his mind until his death in 1992. While studying French near Chantilly in 1927, he happened upon Poussin ’sgreat Massacre of the Innocents (1628–29) and was struck by the emotional agony of the scene, embodied forcefully in the screaming maw of a mother whose child is about to be killed. Later that year, he picked up a book detailing diseases of the mouth, and not long after that, he watched Sergei Eisenstein’s 1925 film Battleship Potemkin, which features a scene of a howling, bloodied nurse—an image permanently tattooed on his mind. Around that time, on a trip to Paris, he was also introduced to Picasso ’searly figurative drawings. All these run-ins provided Bacon with his initial art education (he was never formally trained) and went on to influence his unique approach to rendering the human body as a malleable—and, at times, grotesque—vessel of raw human feeling.

THREE STUDIES FOR FIGURES AT THE BASE OF A CRUCIFIXION 1944 Oil and pastel on fibreboard approx. Triptych: Each panel: 37 x 29 in. (94 x 74 cm) irregular

The wide-open mouth would later materialize in some of the painter’s greatest canvases: his series of wailing popes, which he toiled over from 1949 until 1971. They show blurred, bethroned men caught in the act of an intense and seemingly eternal scream that, as Bacon biographer Michael Peppiatt has said, might have referred simultaneously to the militaristic orders of Bacon’s father, the raging rows between Bacon and his tortured lover Peter Lacy, or more simply, to a cry of fear or the climax of a body-quaking orgasm. This was the rare power of Bacon’s work: fusing a range of references into a Frankenstein’s monster of a whole, a beast shuddering with frustration, tension, and countless other, subtler emotions.

Bacon’s “Popes” also reveal another influence: Velázquez ’s Portrait of Pope Innocent X (1650), a painting Bacon became so infatuated with that he admitted to having a “crush” on it. Time and time again, Bacon would rework his own version of the masterpiece, although, interestingly, he refused to see the painting in person when he finally made a trip to Rome. He was embarrassed, he told Peppiatt, of his many “stupid” manipulations of the piece.

Alongside the many other great artists (Giacometti, Van Gogh, and Matisse among them) who influenced Bacon, the painter also looked for creative guidance in the work of writers and poets—namely Racine, Baudelaire, and Proust. He was attracted to their ability to pare down the complexities of human existence into succinct lines and phrases; he sought to do the same with the arresting figures rooted at the core of his canvases.

THREE STUDIES FOR A CRUCIFIXION 1962 Oil on canvas Triptych: Each panel: 78 x 57 in. (198.1 x 144.8 cm)

How Did He Work?

Reproductions of Bacon’s inspirations—like the Massacre of the Innocents, along with tattered photos of wild animals, Egyptian talismans, and more—ended up in a soupy jumble on the floors of the many studios he occupied over the course of his career. The exuberant mess was accented with paint and the occasional vestiges of parties he hosted after a long night of carousing through London’s drinking clubs and gambling houses. One of Bacon’s friends, the painter Graham Sutherland , once described Bacon’s early Cromwell Place studio as “a large chaotic place, where the salad bowl was likely to have paint on it and the painting to have salad dressing on it.” But for all his decadence, Bacon was also extremely dedicated, with his own brand of regimentation. “You have to be disciplined in everything, even in frivolity,” he was known to have said. “Above all in frivolity.” Indeed, his passion for enthusiastic and prolonged socialization seemed to fuel his work. Without fail, after a late night of partying, he would wake up at 6 a.m. to paint for several hours in the morning light. Then he’d begin dining and boozing about town, liaising with his many friends and acquaintances, from fellow painters Lucian Freud and Frank Auerbach to renowned London collectors, such as the Sainsbury’s, to one of his many lovers, like Lacy or Eric Hall. He even went so far as to say that he worked better after a night of drinking: “My mind simply crackles with electricity after one of those evenings,” he once boasted to his friends. “I think the drink actually makes me freer.”

THREE FIGURES AND PORTRAIT 1975 Oil, pastel, alkyd paint and sand on canvas 78 x 58 in. (198.1 x 147.3 cm)

There were some risks to this routine, however. On several occasions, he’d come home late at night, wildly drunk, and decide to “perfect” a painting he’d finished the day before, only to wake up the next morning and discover that he’d ruined it. After one of these episodes, his gallery began collecting his paintings from his studio the moment he finished them.

Bacon’s childhood nanny, Jessie Lightfoot, who lived with the painter until her death in 1951, and his two primary dealers—first Erica Brausen at Hanover Gallery, then Valerie Beston at Marlborough Gallery—also played major roles in helping organize his life and career. When Bacon was struggling financially during his youth, Lightfoot helped him find lovers who would also provide financial support. Brausen became a close friend and confidante; they bonded over their shared homosexuality and appetites for risk-taking (Bacon’s on the canvas; Brausen’s on the walls of her gallery). And starting in 1958, Miss Beston, as she was affectionately called, arranged almost all of Bacon’s day-to-day logistics during his most successful years. She paid his bills, arranged his calendar, made sure his apartment stayed clean, and kept him to his painting schedule. She also kept his canvases out of the trash bin, as he was known to destroy them.

Why Does His Work Matter?

Bacon brought new emotional intensity to the painted figure by representing his subjects—be they friends or mythological figures—as contorted, fleshy, emotionally open masses. He sought to reveal, in all its complexity, what was behind the human facade. “I would like my pictures to look as if a human being had passed between them, like a snail leaving its trail of the human presence…as a snail leaves its slime,” he once said. Indeed, Bacon’s paintings pulsate with the dual energy of human suffering and ecstasy. They seem to unearth, in their blurred limbs and wide-open mouths, our most primal urges. (Scholars have noted that in his canvases from the 1950s, monkeys and men often closely resemble one another.)

Francis Bacon

Triptych – August 1972, 1989 Marlborough Gallery