#then again i was told that i have to also start improving my attendance and anyone who isnt on the trip tomorrow will be marked absent :

[dustpages]

Do what we like

I was lying on the couch in your living room, I had just finished my last year of high school. I was excited since it was the summer holiday and I had many plans. The apartment was silent and I was getting bored of being alone when I heard the sound of a key opening the door's lock.  I was excited since my aunt Sana had come home earlier than usual. I ran to greet her at the entrance when I was met with a shocking sight.

Sana was wearing a tight black dress, so tight it looked as if it was painted on her. The dress hugged every inch of her slim body, her nice round butt and her big tits. She wore black heels, making her look even more like a supermodel. Her hair was perfectly styled and her makeup made her look like an angel. She had a smile on her face but she was also slightly sweaty. She dropped her purse on the floor and she smiled at me.

“Hi, sweetie!”

She was wearing a black thong underneath her dress that barely covered her butt and left a bit of it visible. I couldn’t take my eyes off her, I had never seen her looking so gorgeous before.

“Hi, auntie.” I greeted her shyly in fluent Japanese.

“Oh, my dear you’re learning so fast! You couldn't utter a single word  when you arrived.” She said as she took off her heels and walked towards the kitchen.

 I was still following her with my eyes when I noticed that her dress was riding up her thighs, I could see the straps of her thong on her hips and my eyes widened at the sight of it. “Do you want to eat something?” She asked me as she opened the fridge.

I snapped back into reality. “I'm ok, thank you.” I said. “But I thought you had to stay at work until late.”

She smiled. “I was lucky today, the photoshoot went well and they let me go earlier than usual.”

I nodded and I sat on the couch again. “That’s good.” 

"Did you do something nice today?"

I shrugged. “Just  have been studying all day long"

She sighed. “Oh, poor baby. You deserve some fun too, you know.”

" No worries I've always been used to studying during summer" I responded.  

"I hope you didn't forget that I'm planning to invite a few of my friends for dinner tonight, so please don't be too embarrassed when they will be flirting with me, I'm used to it." She winked.

I nodded. “I won’t be embarrassed. I'll just stay in my room if you need me.”

Sana rolled her eyes. “No way, my friends would kill me if they found out I was keeping such a cute nephew of mine hidden.” She smiled.

I blushed at her words. " There's no need for me to attend such a dinner"  I protested.

She came over to sit on the couch beside me. “Oh, don't be shy, I'm sure you’ll find someone who will like you.”

I looked down at my feet, feeling uncomfortable. “I don’t know…”

She sighed. “What did you say when you arrived in Tokyo?” She asked.

“I wanted to live with you because you were my closest relative and I wanted to learn Japanese better.” I repeated the words I had told her 4 months earlier.

“And do you think that you’re improving in your studies of Japanese? ”

“Yes, I am.” I nodded.

“Well, if you really want to improve it you need to speak with people more. You can start with my friends.” She said as she grabbed my chin and looked at me in the eyes.

“Ok.” I nodded. “I’ll try.”

She smiled. “That’s a good boy.” She kissed my forehead and got up from the sofa to head to her room.

I heard her door slam shut and I let out a sigh of relief. I had to admit that it had been nice to see Sana looking so gorgeous but at the same time, I was worried. What if someone saw her like this? What if she did something inappropriate?

I heard her door open again and saw her coming out of her room. “I'm going to take a shower. Do you need to use it before me?” She asked as she walked towards the bathroom.

I shook my head. “No, I don’t.”

“Ok. I'll be fast then.” She smiled and went inside the bathroom.

Soon after, just 2 hours later, she came back fully decked out in her gorgeous black dress and heels. She looked as if she had just stepped off a fashion magazine cover.

“Are you sure you don’t want to wear something nice too?” She asked as she looked at me wearing just a pair of shorts and a white t-shirt.

" Do I need to?" I whined. " You are the star of the night, not me."

She laughed. “My friends won’t eat you. Don’t be shy.” She winked.

I sighed. “If you say so.”

“Do you have anything nice to wear? ” She asked me.

I nodded becoming emotional. The last present that my mother gave me while we lived in London was a nice dressy white shirt and matching black trousers from Burberry.  

" I have some new clothes that my mother bought for me before she passed away." I said.

Sana lost her smile as soon as I mentioned my mother. My mother and Sana had always been very close. They were sisters but they had grown up in different places. My mother had moved to the U.K. when she was 16 and she had never returned to Japan.

“Ah, ok, then put those on.” She said as she tried to hide her feelings. She walked over to me and hugged me.

“Don’t worry, I’m here now.” She said. “I know it can be tough sometimes but you’re not alone.”

I nodded. “I know, I appreciate it. You have been a great aunt to me so far.” 

She smiled again. “I will try to be the best aunt in the world.” She said. “Now go get changed.”

I nodded and I went to my room. I quickly put on my clothes and went to the bathroom to brush my teeth and comb my hair. I was putting on some cologne when I heard the sound of the buzzer. I heard the clacking of  Sana’s heels on the hardwood floor and I came out of the bathroom to see her opening the door to let her friends in.

 There were three of them, two men and one girl. They were all dressed nicely and they all had a smile on their faces. They greeted Sana with a hug and a kiss on the cheek before coming inside.

 When they saw me they all stopped and stared. “Who is this?” One of them asked in Japanese.

Sana smiled. “This is my nephew from the U.K. His mother is my sister and she asked me to take care of him.”

The girl was the first one to recover from her shock. She was wearing a red dress and she looked very beautiful. She came over to me and greeted me. “Nice to meet you. I’m Yumi.” She said.

The two guys were still staring at me and I was getting slightly uncomfortable. “This is Taro and Hiro.” Sana introduced them.

I greeted them back and Sana ushered her friends inside to the living room. “Sit down, please. I’ll make something to drink.” She said.

I sat on the couch and I noticed that the girl, Yumi, sat beside me. She had a nice smile and she smelled good too.

“So, are you really Sana’s nephew?” She asked me.

“Yes.” I nodded. “My mother was her sister. I've lived in London for all my life till I had to move here with Sana" I said. 

She laughed. “I can’t believe Sana’s sister has a son as cute as you.” She smiled.

I blushed at her words and I thanked her in Japanese. “Do you speak Japanese?” She asked me in surprise.

I nodded. “Yes, I do. I’ve been learning it in London since I was young.” I said.

Yumi smiled. “I’m sure your aunt is proud of you.” She said.

I nodded. “She is.” I replied.

I looked at Taro and Hiro and I saw that they were still staring at me. I felt a bit uncomfortable and I tried to make conversation. “So, what do you do?” I asked them.

Taro was the first one to answer. “I’m a photographer and I worked with your aunt for a few years.” He said.

Hiro nodded too. “And I’m a model too, I met your aunt at a photoshoot a year ago.” He said.

I smiled. “It’s nice that you all are friends.” I said.

Yumi nodded. “We became friends when we worked together on a project.” She said.

Sana came back into the living room with drinks and some snacks and sat down beside me. “What were you talking about?” She asked.

Taro spoke up. “We were just introducing ourselves.”

Sana smiled. “Good, I’m glad you’re getting along.” She said.

I noticed that Sana was sitting very close to me and she was touching my leg with hers. I didn’t think much of it since I knew she was a very clingy person. But when I saw the guys staring at us, I realized that they might think we were more than just aunt and nephew. I felt myself becoming nervous and I tried to move away from her but she grabbed my arm and pulled me back to her. She was smiling at me and I noticed that her smile seemed slightly different. She leaned in to whisper something in my ear.

“Don’t worry, I know what you’re thinking.” She said. “We’re not doing anything wrong, right?”

I shook my head. “No, of course not.”

She kissed my ear and she whispered again. “Good. Let’s just enjoy our evening with my friends, ok?”

I nodded. “Ok, sure.”

I looked back at Taro, Hiro and Yumi and they were all staring at me with a strange expression on their faces. I didn’t know what they were thinking but I was hoping it wasn’t anything bad.

Sana got up from the couch and walked to the kitchen. “I have to prepare dinner.”

I got up too. “Let me help you.”

Sana shook her head. “No, stay here and chat with my friends.” She affirmed. “It’s good for your Japanese.”

I nodded and sat down again beside Yumi. She smiled at me. “Don’t worry, we don’t bite.” She said.

I smiled back. “I know.”

We started chatting and Taro and Hiro joined in our conversation. They were talking about their jobs and they were telling me some funny stories. I was laughing at them when I noticed that Taro was staring at me again. His eyes were fixed on me and he was smiling.

“Are you ok?” I asked him.

He nodded. “I’m ok. I was just wondering if you’re really Sana’s nephew.”

I laughed. “Yes, I am. What makes you doubt it?” 

He shrugged. “I don’t know. You just don’t look like her.”

I laughed again. “ He is not the brightest" I replied in a Cockney accent and just Yumi got it and laughed.

Taro and Hiro looked confused. “What did you say?” Taro asked me.

I shook my head. “Nothing.”

Yumi giggled again and leaned in to whisper in my ear. “Don’t worry, I got it. That’s a London accent, right?”

I smiled and nodded. “You’re correct indeed.” I said.

She smiled back. “I love it. You sound like a real Londoner.” She said.

I laughed. “I am one.” I replied.

Taro looked confused again. “I don’t understand what you two are saying.”

I laughed. “We are speaking in English.” I said.

Yumi spoke up. “It’s nice to hear you speaking English, you sound cute.” She said.

I blushed again at her words. “Thank you.” I said.

Hiro looked annoyed and he got up from his seat. “I need to go to the bathroom.” He said.

 “I’ll be right back.”

He walked off and Taro followed him. “I need to use it too.” He said.

Yumi and I were left alone in the living room. We were sitting on the sofa together and we were facing each other smiling.

“Are you having fun?” She asked me.

“I am thankful to you, for chatting with me, I feel less nervous now.”

She nodded. “You don’t have to be nervous. You’re a nice guy.” She said.

I blushed again. “Thanks.” I said.

She looked down at my body. “You’re really cute too.” She said.

I was about to thank her again when I heard the sound of the door opening. Sana came back in the room and she had a tray of food in her hands.

 “I hope you’re hungry.” She said. “I prepared a lot of food.”

We all got up from the couch and went to the dining room. Sana had prepared a lot of dishes and they all smelled delicious. We started eating and we were chatting while we did.

Yumi and I were still chatting but the guys were chatting with Sana. She was smiling and laughing and I saw that she was slightly drunk. She was drinking some wine and I saw that she had had a few glasses already.

I stood up and went to Sana. " You have been drinking too much, let's call the night" I whispered in her ear gently.  

She was swaying slightly and she was smiling at me. “Don’t be a spoilsport, sweetie.” She said. “We are still having fun.”

I grabbed her arm. “You need to stop drinking.” I said.

She rolled her eyes. “I can handle myself.” She said.

I sighed. “Please, auntie, let’s stop.” I begged her.

Sana looked at me with a confused expression plastered on her face. “Oh, my dear, you’re so cute when you’re worried about me.” She exclaimed. “But there’s no need to worry.” She leaned in to kiss my cheek and I felt her lips on my skin. I tried to pull away but she grabbed my arm and pulled me to her. “Let’s dance.” She said. “I love dancing with you.”

I tried to protest again but Sana didn’t listen. She started dancing with me and I could smell her perfume. Her dress was riding up her thighs and I could see the straps of her thong. I tried to ignore the sight and focus on her dancing but it was hard. She was a great dancer and she was moving her body in a very seductive way.

Taro, Hiro and Yumi were all staring at us. They had stopped eating and they were watching us dance.

When the music ended, Sana leaned in to kiss me again. This time she didn’t stop at my cheek and she kissed me on the lips. I tried to pull away but she was holding my face with her hands. I could feel her tongue on my lips and I taste her lipstick.

I heard someone gasp and I saw Taro, Hiro and Yumi staring at us in shock. I pulled away from Sana and I saw that she was smiling at me. She was swaying slightly and her eyes were half closed.

“I love you, my dear.” She said. “You’re the best thing that has happened to me.”

Looking at her friends. " Can you please leave?" I asked " She is clearly too drunk" I said.

Yumi nodded. “We’ll go.” She said. “Take care of your aunt.”

Taro and Hiro nodded too and they all got up from their seats to leave. They said goodbye to Sana and they left the apartment.

I looked back at Sana and she was smiling at me again. She was leaning against the wall and she was looking at me with a confused expression on her face. I walked over to her and grabbed her arm.

“Let’s get you to bed.”

She nodded. “I’m tired.” 

I helped her to her room and I put her to bed. She was mumbling something in Japanese that I could not get, I tucked her in the blanket and I turned off the light.

I was about to leave when I heard her calling me. “My dear.”

I walked back to her bedside. “What do you need?” I asked.

She looked up at me smiling. “Stay with me tonight.” She whispered. “I don’t want to be alone.”

I nodded. “Ok, I’ll stay.” I affirmed.

She smiled again and she pulled back the blanket. “Get in bed with me.”

I nodded and I took off my shoes and laid down beside her. She wrapped her arms around me and she started kissing my neck. I tried to push her away but she was holding me tightly kissing my neck and moaning softly. I could hear the sound of her breathing and it was driving me crazy.

" Sana you should sleep" I told her softly caressing her back. 

She nodded and I felt her relaxing against my body. I held her in my arms and I stroked her hair. She was warm and she smelled good. I felt her body relaxing against mine and I knew she had fallen asleep. I felt safe with her in my arms and I didn’t want to let her go.

I fell asleep holding her and when I woke up again, she was smiling at me.

 She was lying on top of me looking down at me with a smile on her face. She was wearing a short black nightie that barely covered her and I could see her tits through the fabric. My dick was hard and I was trying to ignore it.

“Good morning, my dear.” She said as she leaned in to kiss me.

I tried to pull away but she was holding my face with her hands. The kiss was soft,  I could taste her mouthwash. I tried to relax and enjoy the kiss but I knew it was wrong. We were aunt and nephew and we shouldn’t be kissing like this.

She broke the kiss and she looked down at me. “Did you sleep well?” She asked.

I nodded. “I did.”

She smiled. “I’m glad. I was worried that you would be uncomfortable sleeping with your old aunt.”

I laughed. “I wasn’t uncomfortable.”

Sana smiled and leaned in to kiss me. This time she was more aggressive and pushed her tongue in my mouth exploring my tongue and lips.

" I'm free today, let's go to the beach" She proposed, her face inches away from mine. " I want to see you in swim trunks" She said with a naughty smile.

" It will be a pleasure" I smiled back at her. " I will prepare a lunchbox for us”

Sana clapped her hands happily. " Oh, that sounds perfect." She said.

I nodded and I got up from the bed. “I’ll go make breakfast.”

She nodded and she got out of bed too. She walked over to me and she hugged me. “Thank you for being such a sweet nephew.” She said. “You make me feel so loved.”

I hugged her back. “I love you too.” I said.

She smiled again and she let me go. “Now go make breakfast.” She said. “I’m starving.”

We had a quick breakfast in silence and we headed to the beach. Sana drove and we went to a beach she had in mind parking in a designated spot. We walked towards the beach and finally arrived at a beautiful white sanded beach with the ocean in front of us. Sana was walking in front of me, wearing a white bikini and high heels and her long hair waving in the wind. 

"Let's stop here.” she declared, pointing at a small clearing near a tree. We stopped there and sat down, taking off our shoes. I looked at Sana, who was staring at me with her big brown eyes. She was really stunning, her hair falling down her shoulders and her tits bulging from her top. 

I cleared my throat and turned around, trying to ignore her. "It's really hot today.” I said. 

" Indeed. Would you apply the sunscreen on my back?" she asked me. 

I nodded and took the sunscreen from her hands. She turned around and I started to apply the sunscreen on her back, starting from her shoulders and moving down to the curve of her waist. I could smell her sweet perfume as I was rubbing the sunscreen on her skin. 

She was soft and warm under my fingers, her skin smooth and delicate. I was feeling a bit weird, rubbing her back like that but I kept doing it until she told me to stop. 

"That is a sight to behold" we heard a deep male voice commenting and others voices laughing in agreement.  

I turned around and saw a group of guys ogling at Sana's body, the comment was inappropriate but the message of it was indeed true. 

" Stop staring at me, losers" she stated, turning around. I saw her giving them a seductive smile and a wink. The guys laughed again. 

" Oh come on a woman like you what is doing with a kid like him? You should come with us to party." The guy who commented first spoke. 

Sana turned around and faced me. "What do you say? Should I join them? They are so hot"  she said, raising an eyebrow at me. 

I shrugged. "I'm not stopping you" I affirmed, looking away. She stood up and walked towards the guys, chatting with them for a while. I was sitting on the sand, looking away from them. 

After a few minutes, I heard Sana shouting something and I turned around. She was running towards me with the guys behind her, chasing her. They were laughing and she was squealing like a little girl, I could tell they were all having a good time. 

They caught her and started tickling her. "Stop, stop! It's too much!" she was shouting. She fell down on the sand and the guys fell on her, tickling her.  She was laughing and screaming trying to free herself from their grip, her body moving under theirs, her tits shaking. They were all laughing like crazy and I knew they were having fun, maybe too much.

Somehow Sana managed to free herself and started to run away. The guys chased her again and soon she was running towards me, shouting "Help me!"

I stood up and she hid behind me. "Please, save me from these monsters!" she said, pressing her tits against my back. I turned around and looked at them. 

" Guys enough is enough," I affirmed. " Let's quit this play."  

 The guys nodded laughing and she gave me a smile. "Thank you, my hero,”

They went for their way and Sana sat next to me on the sand. She was still panting and I could see her tits shaking under her bikini. 

I hugged her sideways. "Are you ok?" I asked. 

She nodded smiling. "I'm fine, thank you for saving me.”

I shrugged. "No problem, auntie," I said. "That's what I’m here for."

Sana laughed. "Oh, my dear, you’re so sweet." She said as she leaned in to kiss me on the cheek. 

I blushed and she noticed it. "What’s wrong?" She asked.

"Nothing, auntie." I said. "I’m just happy that I could help you."

Sana nodded. "You’re such a good nephew." She admitted. "I don’t know what I would do without you."

I smiled. " Let's go in the water.”  I said. " I need to cool off." 

She nodded. "Me too."  And took off her heels. 

 We walked towards the ocean, hand in hand. The sun was shining and the sea was warm. We walked in the water and I splashed her. She laughed and splashed me back. We started to play in the water and Sana was laughing like a little girl. Her tits bounced up and down as she moved and her hair was wet dripping water. She looked stunning, her skin glistening in the sun, her wet hair plastered against her head. 

After a while we stopped playing and she swam towards me. I felt her body pressed against mine as she hugged me, her tits pressing against my chest. I had a boner and I knew it was visible.

She looked at me and smiled. "I think you need to cool off more." She stated. "Let me help you."

She leaned in to kiss me and I let her do it. She was soft and warm against me, her tits squishing against my chest. She started to move her hips against mine and I could feel her rubbing her pussy against my cock. 

" Oh, auntie.” I moaned. 

She broke the kiss and looked at me with her big brown eyes. "I’m sorry, my dear." She said. "I know I shouldn’t be doing this here."  She looked down at my boner. 

" Let's go home.” She suggested. 

I nodded and we swam back to the shore. We dried ourselves and headed back to the car. As soon as we were in the car, Sana grabbed my face in her hands and started to kiss me. She was hungry and I could tell she wanted me bad. I kissed her back, feeling her tongue on mine, our lips pressed together. She was moaning softly and I could hear the sound of her breathing. 

I broke the kiss. "Let’s get home, auntie." I said.

She nodded and she started to drive. I could see the tension in her body, I gently caressed her naked legs . She was moaning softly and I knew she was enjoying it. I was feeling her skin under my fingers and I could smell her sweet perfume. 

When we arrived at our apartment, she ran inside, dragging me with her. We went straight to her room and we kissed again. She pushed her tongue in my mouth, her lips against mine, her hands roaming my body. She took off her bikini and threw it on the floor, standing in front of me in her thong. I could see her tits bouncing as she moved, her skin glistening in the light. 

I took off my swim trunks too and I stood in front of her in my boxers, my boner visible through the fabric. Sana looked at me and she smiled. "You’re so cute." She said as she took off my boxers too. She grabbed my cock in her hands and started to rub it. 

"Oh, auntie," I moaned. "That feels good."

She smiled again. "I’m glad you like it." She said as she knelt in front of me. 

She took my cock in her mouth and started to suck me. I moaned loudly as I felt her warm mouth on me. Her tongue was swirling around my tip and her hands were rubbing my balls. I could feel her saliva on my skin as she sucked me, making my boner harder and harder. 

 I was moaning softly and I could hear the sound of her breathing. 

After a while she stopped and released my member with a loud pop. Her eyes were fixed on it as she was licking her lips.

 "You taste good, my dear." She said. "I want you now." 

She stood up and pushed me to lie down on her bed. She took off her thong and threw it on the floor.  She was completely naked now, her skin glistening in the light.

Sana climbed on top of me, straddling me. Her tits were dangling in front of my face and I could see her nipples. She grabbed my cock and rubbed on her pussy lips moaning.

" Sana, I gotta tell you I'm a virgin.” I confessed. " I've never been with a woman before.” 

Sana smiled. "Don't worry, I'll be gentle." She asserted as she positioned my member at her entrance and slowly slid it in. 

" Oh, auntie." I moaned. "You’re so tight."

"I know, my dear." She started to move her hips against me.

I moaned loudly as I felt her pussy on my cock. It was warm and wet and it felt good, too good.

My balls tensed up and my orgasm was imminent. 

" Sana I'm about to cum in a matter of seconds." I warned her and she frowned looking disappointed. 

"Already?" She pouted. 

I nodded and she moaned. "Do it then." She said. "Cum inside me."

I did and my body shuddered at the pleasure. " I'm sorry to have come this fast" I stated. 

She smiled. "Don't worry, my dear." She said. " You are new at this. You’ll learn to control your orgasm in time." And she dismounted me snuggling against my body.

" I feel pathetic" I commented. " I haven't lasted even 3 minutes" 

“Indeed, you didn't last a lot, but that was your first time and you're still very young. Don't worry" she reassured me. "And I have enjoyed it." She said as she started to rub my spent cock. 

" Do you mind a very personal question?" I inquired her.  

"Not at all, I'm your auntie and we are naked in the same bed." She giggled. "You can ask me anything." 

I took a deep breath. " I want to know who long lasted the longest sexual intercourse you have ever had with a man?" I questioned. 

Sana laughed. "Oh, my dear. You have asked me the million-dollar question." She replied. "And I’m afraid it will make you feel bad.”

" Go ahead and tell me anyway." I encouraged her.

" Ok, if you insist." She stroked my belly. "I met him at a fashion show a few years ago. He was tall and handsome and he had an amazing body. We started talking and we discovered to have a lot in common.I knew I wanted to have him the first time I saw him." She said with a smile. "And after a week, I finally succeeded in seducing him." 

"And?" I prompted. 

" Well we met in a hotel room and we started making out. We kissed for a while and then he took off my dress. I was wearing a thong and a bra and he took those off too. He was naked too and he had an amazing cock. Long and thick." She said. 

" How long are you talking about compared to mine?" I asked.

" Baby the length is not the most important thing. Trust me." She observed with a smile. "Anyway he was maybe  2 inches longer than you. But not thicker." 

I was getting aroused again as I was listening to her. I grabbed my cock and started to rub it.

" Keep going." I encouraged her. " I'm almost ready to come again." I moaned. 

She laughed. "Oh, my dear, you are so easy to turn on.”

" He was savage. He  threw me on the bed and he was on top of me immediately." She said. "He grabbed my legs and put them on his shoulders and entered me with one thrust." 

" Did you like it?" I asked.

" Oh, yes. I loved it." She admitted. "He was rough but in a good way. He was thrusting in me so hard it was painful but I liked it. Then he switched positions and we did doggy style, I  was on my knees with my ass up in the air and he was fucking me from behind. He fisted my hair, he was fucking me like a beast. He was pounding my pussy like there was no tomorrow." She said. "And then he took me from behind in a standing position with me bent over the bed. I was on my elbows with my tits dangling down and he was fucking me from behind, slamming his cock in me." She said. "And finally in that position he rammed me to fill in, and I felt him squirting inside of me, it was so hot" She moaned. 

I was getting more and more excited listening to her words. I grabbed her tit in my hand and started to squeeze it. I rubbed her nipple with my thumb and she moaned, her eyes were closed and her mouth was open. She was enjoying my touch.

"I know you're ready for me again." She said as she opened her eyes and looked at me.

I nodded. "I am, auntie." I said. "I want you again." I moaned.

She smiled. "Well, come on then." She said. "Fuck me." She said as she opened her legs wide and showed me her pussy. 

"You are so beautiful Sana, so perfect" I praised her while my tongue made its way to her nipple and I licked and bit them softly. She was moaning loudly, her hands holding my hair, pushing my face harder against her tits. 

I could feel her body shivering. " I'm about to cum, baby." She said.

Her body shivered and she came, her juices dripping down her leg. I held her tightly against my body. 

As soon as her climax rode down, I went down her body and started to lick her pussy and her clit. Her moans were echoing in the room. She tasted so sweet and delicious. 

" Baby, baby, you make me feel so good." She acknowledged.

I kept licking her pussy, tasting her juices. Her body was shivering, she was so close to cum. 

" Oh baby, I'm about to cum." She said.

Her body shivered and she came again, her juices soaking my tongue which didn't stop doing its job till the orgasm was over. 

" Best juice ever Sana" I laughed giving her one last swirl to her fold with my tongue.  

I stood up and looked at her. She was so gorgeous, her body was so soft. Her pussy was still dripping with her juices. 

She took my dick in her hand. She rubbed it against her pussy, coating it with her juices. She was so wet.

" Please, fuck me." She said as she took my cock and guided it to her entrance. I moved my body over her and shoved my member in her in one thrust. 

Sana moaned. "Oh baby, you’re so big."

I started to move my hips, thrusting in and out of her. She was so tight and warm. I could feel her pussy walls on my cock, squeezing me tight.

" Oh, baby, fuck me harder." She said as she wrapped her legs around me.

I increased my pace, fucking her harder. I could hear the sound of our skin slapping together. 

" Fuck" She screamed under me and with her nails she dug into my back, her pussy pulsating around me gushing with juices as she came. I felt her juices dripping down her legs.

" Lay on your stomach Sana.” I told her.  

She obeyed, turned around and put her belly on the duvet. 

I hovered over her body and shoved my dick inside her sensitive cunt pounding her faster and faster. 

" Baby slow down, I'm still too sensitive" She begged.  

But I didn't, I was possessed by lust and kept fucking her without any mercy. She tried to crawl away from my pounding but I held her arm still in position. 

" Please baby, please" She pleaded.  

But I didn't give her any break, I kept pounding her like a beast and after a few minutes her body shivered and she came, squirting on my dick.

" F-fuuuuckk" She screamed loudly.  " Oh my god baby, you are splitting me in half" 

 She begged. " I'm about to pass out" 

I increased my speed if possible, my body was reaching its limit. 

"Sana I'm about to cum" I moaned. 

Her pussy was tightening around me, making it impossible to move. Her body was shivering like crazy. 

" Oh shit baby I'm about to cum again" She screamed.

" Fill me up honey" She begged me. " I want to be filled of you." She screamed.

My dick exploded and I felt my seed filling up her womb. I collapsed on her back breathing heavily, panting.

I pulled out of her and lay down on the bed. Sana moved next to me and hugged me tightly. She kissed my lips passionately. 

" I love you, my dear." She said. " You are the best fuck I've ever had." She smiled. 

I smiled back. "I love you too, auntie." I said as I hugged her back. "You’re the best thing that has happened to me."

She smiled.  "I’m glad we found each other." 

The next morning I was wakened up by a fantastic pleasure, Sana was on me sucking my nipples. 

My body was shivering in pleasure.

" Baby I gotta get ready for an event this afternoon so I won't have time to give you more attention than this" And she bit my nipple. 

I was moaning loudly. " It's fine, auntie." I said as I held her face in my hands. "You can always come back to me." I said. 

She smiled and licked my neck. "I will baby, now go get ready." She said as she got up from the bed. 

I got up from the bed too and went to shower. Sana came with me and washed my body. I could feel her hands on me, caressing my skin. I was still hard and I could see her looking at my dick. She was smiling. 

When we were done she went to her dresser and she started to get ready for her event. I sat down on the bed and watched her leave with a plain T-shirt and a pair of joggers. 

I looked at her a bit confused. " The dress is at the office, I'll get ready there with someone to comb my hair and do my makeup" She explained understanding my confusion.

" I understand" I nodded. "Have fun at the event." 

" I'll have more fun once I'm home" Sana kissed me goodbye and left.  

The day was mostly uneventful till around 9 pm when Sana got home. 

I was sitting on the sofa when I heard the front door opening. 

" Do not turn around" She ordered me. Her high heels clacked on the wood floor. 

" Baby close your eyes" She ordered again. I did as I was told. I heard her heels clacking on the floor and soon she was in front of me. I could feel her body heat against mine.

" Open your eyes." She said.

I opened my eyes and I saw that she was wearing a gold dress that barely covered her body. Her legs were naked displayed in full glory and the heels were shining. Her make-up was light making her seem like a doll. 

Her gaze was magnetic and stuck on me. I started to shiver, her beauty tonight was on another level. 

"Auntie you are mesmerizing tonight" I complimented her.  

" Do you want me to model for you?" She asked me. I obviously nodded.  She moved around me in a slow circle, displaying herself in full glory. Her dress was so short I could see the lines of her ass.

Sana started to do her catwalk like she was on the runway,  she was walking towards the dining table positioned in front of the Tokyo Tower window, and she was swaying her hips with each step. Her dress was fluttering with the movement, displaying more of her body with each step. I was salivating just looking at her.

When she reached the dining table she put one heel on it and bent down with her leg on the table and the other on the ground, and her ass was facing me, displayed for me to see.  She had a thong on and her cheeks were full and round, making me want to bite them. 

" I know you like them." She said as she moved her hips and wiggled her butt in front of me. "Don't you?" She asked

I didn't respond but dashed towards her kneeling down and I showered with kisses on her milky legs, liking every inch of them. I was biting her skin lightly. 

She moaned. "Oh, baby, I'm loving this.” She said as she bent her knees slightly to give me access to her pussy. I moved my tongue up her leg until I reached her pussy and started to lick her folds.

"Oh, baby, that feels so good." She said. "Keep doing it." 

I kept licking her pussy until her juices dripped down her leg. I could see she was ready.

I stood up and took off my joggers and boxers, my cock was already hard. 

I grabbed Sana in my arms holding her tight, her body was so soft and warm to drive me crazy, I began kissing her collarbone, my lips were trailing down her skin and she was moaning softly. I bit her neck, I wanted to make sure that she knew it was me who was claiming her. I started to suck her neck, leaving hickeys on her skin. I could feel her body trembling in my arms.

" Oh baby, you're so hot when you're rough." She said. "I love it." 

She wrapped her legs around my waist and I could feel her pussy on my cock. She rubbed her pussy on my cock moaning. She was so wet that she was dripping on my balls. 

"I'm ready for you." She said. "Fuck me." She demanded.

" Hold your horses, I just started" I responded. 

My mouth connected with hers, our tongues were swirling together, I was holding her tight and she had her legs around my waist. 

I broke the kiss. " Bend over the table." I ordered her.

She did as she was told and bent over the table, her ass facing me. I could see her thong between her ass cheeks. I started to rub my cock against her pussy, making her moan softly. Her pussy was wet and hot and my cock was throbbing in desire. I pulled down her thong and up her dress, rubbed my cock on her pussy lips and then I thrust in her. She moaned loudly.

" Oh, baby, you’re so big." She gasped. "You fill me up so good."

" I'm gonna be sorry just from now, I will not hold back anything on you tonight Sana" I warned her.  

"Oh baby, that's what I want." She moaned. "I want you to fuck me hard and fast, to pound my pussy like there is no tomorrow."

I increased my pace, fucking her harder. She was moaning loudly, her body shaking as I moved my hips.

" Fuck" She screamed. "You're so good, baby. You know exactly what I want." She asserted as she came on my dick. Her pussy was squirting all over the table, her juices dripping down her legs.

I kept pounding her until I felt her second orgasm approaching, her walls were tightening around my cock, her body shivering. I increased my speed even more and pounded her like a wild animal. 

" Oh shit baby I'm about to cum again" She screamed. " Fuck me harder baby, please" She begged. 

I pounded her harder slamming my balls on her ass at every single thrust. My thumb motioned on her ass crack and dove in. She was screaming louder now, her body shivering even more. 

" F-fuuckk" She screamed louder. Her womb flooded with her juice drenching  my balls. Her pussy walls were pulsating around my cock and I felt it exploding, spilling my seed inside her womb. 

Her body shook under me and her juices flooded again my dick, I was still pounding her. 

" I'm about to pass out, baby, stop" She pleaded. I stopped and pulled out, I carried her on my arms till the window in front of the Tokyo Tower and made her stand up.  She was shaking and her legs were trembling. 

" I'm not done with you yet" I whispered in her ear as I grabbed her wrists behind her back. "Open your legs, baby, I'm gonna claim you as mine." I said. 

She opened her legs for me and bent a little forward, her tits dangling in front of the glass and she was looking at me with desire. I grabbed my cock and rubbed it on her pussy and then I thrusted in her again bottoming out.

" Oooohhh shit baby I'm about to come again" she moaned.

" I want you to" I whispered in her ear. "Cum on my dick baby, show me what a good girl you are for me." I ordered. 

Her body shuddered and her pussy started to squirt again on my dick, her juices dripping down her legs. I could hear her breathing heavily. 

" Oh baby, you make me feel so good" She said.

" I fucking love you Sana" I groaned as fucked her widely holding her body with one arm and playing with her clit with the other. 

I could see her reflection in the window and she was stunning, her tits were dangling down and her hair was messy. 

" Oh shit baby I'm about to cum again" She cried. Her pussy gushed out again and her body shuddered. 

" Finish me honey, I can't resist any much longer." Her legs were trembling.

I grabbed a fistful of her hair pulling her head back. " Beg me to cum in you." I demanded. 

" Please baby, fill me up. I want to be yours." She moaned. 

I pinned her against the window, releasing her hair, and pounded her furiously. My head was near hers sucking her beautiful neck.

 She was moaning in pleasure.

" You are mine Sana, all mine, your pussy is mine to fuck, your ass is mine to pound." I whispered in her ear.

" Yes baby, I am all yours." She moaned. 

Her body shivered and she came again, her pussy squirting on my cock and I could feel her walls tightening around me. My cock exploded inside her, filling her womb with my seed. 

" F-fuuuckk" she screamed again. " Baby you're filling me up again" 

We were stuck like this, me holding her in place, my cock inside her and my cum dripping from her pussy. 

We broke the kiss and I pulled out of her, my seed spilling out of her pussy on the floor. We collapsed on the floor, panting. She was holding my hand in hers.

" I love you too." She said. "You make me feel things that no one has ever made me feel." She said.

I smiled and I kissed her. "I love you too, auntie." I said.

She smiled and she kissed me back. "You’re the best thing that has happened to me." She stated.

“ From now on you are just gonna call me Sana, I’m your girlfriend.” Sana whispered. “We will do what we like, honey.”

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

AITA for pretending to be sick in order to skip school even though I'm making my parents worried?

(I'm submitting this on a Monday. fuck Mondays btw.)

I (15M) am the only child of both of my parents (42F, 44M) and even though I love them and they love me, I feel like they don't really get me. since I was like 12 or so I started getting bullied by my classmates bc, essentially, I have "childish" interests (I like Adventure Time and video-games. my classmates need to realize we're technically still kids, but nooo they're not teenagers they're "Young Adults" and "Too Cool" to like anything remotely childish) and whenever I've tried to tell my parents that I'm experiencing bullying, they somehow end up thinking that I just don't want to go to school bc I'm lazy. I know being a parent is probably not easy but. what the fuck.

from my own experience I've noticed male and female bullies use different methods - guys hit me and use brute force against me while girls say hurtful things to me. one of the guys who bullies me, let's call him DH which stands for Dickhead (15M), is also extremely popular for some reason. he's very tall, very strong and he always uses that against me (I'm almost as tall as DH but I'm just lanky). he bullies anyone who is "beneath him" lol everybody bow down to the king of the fucking world.

today DH was making a scene at recess bc his girlfriend (15F) was wearing a skirt that was too short according to him. he was so mad at her that people were starting to form a circle around them. since DH is so popular people really respect his gf but they clearly respect him more bc today no one tried to help her. I don't respect DH, because he's a dickhead, so I stepped in and said something like "c'mon man what the hell, there's no need to humiliate your girlfriend like this, leave her alone". DH was pissed. he heatedly said that just because no girl will ever want to date me, that doesn't give me the right to tell other guys how to handle their relationships and their girlfriends. he got rlly mad and clearly he wanted to hit me so I ran like hell and proceeded to hide from him for the rest of recess. I felt like a little bitch tbh. DH always makes me feel like a little bitch.

before classes started again his gf found me and talked to me for like 5 minutes. she said I don't know DH like she does and that he's actually a really good boyfriend (HA, sure) and that I would be more liked and popular if I wanted to be, but it's "not normal" that I watch Adventure Time at 15. she also told me that DH intends to beat the shit out of me tomorrow. he said he'll "kill me" and ngl he has the physical strength to do so. this made me shit my fucking pants so today as soon as I got home I decided to pretend I was sick since I can be pretty good at acting. I told my parents I had a headache, I started fake-coughing, I said I felt really tired. I even managed to look pale on purpose by thinking of how fucking scared I was of DH and what he might do to me, and I raised the temperature of the thermometer by rubbing it against the fabric of my sweatshirt.

apparently I was so convincing that my parents agreed to let me skip class tomorrow and they even said I can skip it for the rest of the week if I don't improve (tbh I think I won't "improve" if you know what I mean) and I could see they were worried. this is the reason why I feel like an asshole. at the end of the day I'm making my parents worried, I'm lying about my health and I feel kinda guilty. but I'm too scared, and if I tell them the truth they'll just tell me to "man up" or they'll think once again that I'm just too lazy to want to attend school.

anyway. Adventure Time rocks 🤘🏻

[i9messi]

request for Pablo Gavi x Messi daughter reader! I think it would be cool to see Gavi meeting the family or any ideas are amazing as well, please take your time don’t rush thru it love your work your doing amazing have a wonderful day,afternoon, night <3🫶

Messi's daughter — Pablo Gavi

Word count — 1,1k

gavi's masterlist

"Relax, it’s not a big deal." You tried to calm your boyfriend, who was totally scared to meet your dad.

And the truth was, in a certain way, you understood him. Your dad wasn’t just a normal guy, just like he wasn’t any normal football player. He was Lionel Andrés Messi, also known as the goat. The greatest of all times. Gavi was totally nervous to meet him in person, especially when you were his idol’s daughter.

He was really nervous about a lot of things, like for example, Lionel thinking that he wasn’t enough for you, or that he would give him a bad impression. Gavi loved you and was totally convinced that you were his favorite person and that he wanted to be with you all his life. Still, he felt insecure about meeting him and being judged by nothing else than Messi.

"It's a big deal. It’s Lionel Messi, I have admired him since I'm a kid."

"Yeah, he’s also my dad and he’s an ordinary human being. Vamos."

You had taken advantage of those days off that Gavi and you had to go to Paris, where your dad and your family were staying, due to Messi's career in the PSG. You haven't seen your family in the last months, since you were attending university in Barcelona and it was difficult to keep in touch. You missed your family, your dad, your mom and your brothers. You missed drinking mate and eating asado, things that were a tradition in your family.

You heard music as soon as you entered the house and you followed the sounds. You found your mom, Antonela, sitting on the couch in the living room. The two hugged instantly, releasing small screams and almost yelling how much you had missed each other. She began to look at you from top to bottom, saying that you had grown a lot in that time you had been in Spain. Once she finished paying attention to you and your changes, she looked at Gavi.

The boy was so still that he didn’t seem to be breathing. Pablo was nervous, so much that it made you laugh. You approached him and held his hand, inviting him closer.

"This is my boyfriend, Pablo Gavi."

"Nice to meet you, Gavi." With the kindness that characterized her, Anto approached the football player and shared a hug with him, "Want to eat something? I prepared a little of everything."

Gavi was already embarrassed and shook his head saying no. "Nice to meet you too. I thank you, I already ate."

"He’s a liar, he didn’t eat anything but he’s embarrassed to say yes." You explained and Gavi looked at you with the same look on his face when he didn’t like something. It was his typical face during a bad match. You let out another laugh.

"There’s no need to be ashamed, Gavi. You’re part of the family now." Your mother said, smiling at him.

"Where’s papá?" you wonder.

When it seemed that Gavi was feeling more comfortable, that question made him stand straight again. Your mom told you he was in the backyard and you walked with your boyfriend. Gavi’s hand was sweating a little and he looked more nervous than at any awards ceremony.

"Everything’s gonna be okay, amor."

"I hope so."

You met your dad who was playing football in the backyard with your three brothers. The kids practically ran into your arms when they noticed you, screaming your name. You let go of your boyfriend’s hand for a moment and hugged the kids. That was the moment Leo Messi approached Gavi. The Barça player hardly breathed and when Leo smiled at him, things improved for him. It was a nice start.

"Hi, I’m Leo."

As if half the world didn’t know his name already, you rolled your eyes and looked at your brothers, who asked you a lot of questions.

"Who is that boy?" asked Ciro, the youngest, pointing innocently to Gavi.

"He’s my boyfriend, Pablo. I told you about him."

"I don’t want you to have a boyfriend." the kid simply said.

You smiled, "Why? I love him and he loves me."

None of your brothers seemed convinced that their older sister had a boyfriend but they didn't say anything else. You paid attention again to the conversation between your dad and Gavi, seeing that the brunette was almost pale.

"I'm Pablo, señor Messi"

"Don't call me like that, call me Leo. You want unos mates?" Lionel smiled at your boyfriend, pointing to the argentinian infused drink, which consisted of yerba mate mixed with hot water.

"Yes, of course. I'm a big fan of you, Leo."

Gavi was completely excited now, like a little boy who met his idol in person and wanted to enjoy every second of that meeting. You came to hug your dad, who took you in his arms. You spoke a little with him, introducing Pablo to the conversation, so he could talk a little and the two men would get along. After all, they ended up talking about the World Cup, Barça and football. You saw your boyfriend smile when Messi asked if he wanted to play football with him and his sons. Since they needed another player, you offered to play with them.

You were teaming up with your boyfriend and the oldest of your brothers, Thiago. While Messi was playing with his other two children. Since you knew that both your dad and Gavi were a little rough playing, you decided to be the goalkeeper. Almost forty minutes later, Leo Messi was winning the game, along with your little brothers. You had not been able to catch any of the goals that your dad had made and it was no surprise, but at least you had caught one of your brothers' try of goal.

You apologized to go drink some water and one of your brothers took your place. You sat on the floor and started drinking your water bottle alone. Once the men finished playing ball, they talked a little longer and your boyfriend came over and also sat on the floor, next to you. Gavi was a little sweaty.

"See? It wasn’t a big deal, my dad is a normal human being." you joked, knowing in advance that Pablo was fascinated with Messi.

"I played football with Messi, I am completely satisfied for life."

"I'ma little bit jealous, you know?"

He looked at you, "I love you but you know, he is Messi."

"Bobo."

He kissed you and you smiled. Lucky him and lucky you, your family adored Pablo.

[henke-penke]

Ask for Alenoaheather headcanons and ye shall receive:

At one point, Alejandro and Heather realize that going to the spa frequently is not in fact a universal experience, only a rich kid one. Noah's never gone, and he doesn't see any need to.

His partners absolutely do think their boyfriend who's never use face, hair, or body products in his life could use a spa day for his dry chapped skin.

Heather steals her dad's credit card to take the three of them to a spa with the full package. They go to Alejandro's regular spa so they don't get caught immediately.

Noah's insistent on just getting this over with but my god this robe he's changed into is the fluffiest thing he's ever felt. When it comes time for his first treatment, a facial, he's told to close his eyes and he just knocks out into a nap. The only thing that wakes him up is when the attendant is done and has to shake him awake. The only reason he's not as discontent is because he realizes he can just nap again during the massage.

Meanwhile Alejandro, who comes here often, has a rapport with all the staff. When the staff are familiar with people they start opening up, and they are gossiping hens. He knows this, and he loves this about them. He used to love to trick them into revealing gossip that he could use against others if he ever needed to. He used them as practice for being a manipulator. With Noah and Heather's influence he no longer puts up the charming, gentleman he thinks he needs to be to impress adults. ...But at the same time he very much does still want the gossip and just switches to asking directly rather than tricking them into it.

Heather's also a gossip, though since this isn't her usual spa she doesn't have the usual rapport with them. Though rapport isn't exactly the best word to describe the relationship she has with the people who work at her regular spa. When they worked on her, they'd constantly give her backhanded compliments about her appearance. As a result, she picked up some things. And turned into a rather infamous client who'd ruthlessly criticized the appearance of the people taking care of her. But here they don't know her as the queen bee. And they don't immediately go for trying to complisult her. They lay on compliments pretty thick that makes it so very clear they're trying to poach her as a client given how much money she's just spent and how she isn't hiding the fact she's been to another spa. But...it's a very big improvement to her previous spa environment. So for once, she just doesn't say much and lets them do their thing. And she relaxes.

In between treatments they chat. Well, Alejandro and Heather chat. Noah is a bee that's been doused with smoke and is just sleeping at every given opportunity. Even in the in between room he's just laying on the shoulder of whichever one of them comes out next and sleeps.

All in all it's a fun day for them, and they will do it again.

Yessss !!

I love the idea of one of the staff members giving Heather a compliment and Alejandro being like "I know right !!" and goes on this whole spiel about how she's the most beautiful woman in the world and Heather's just "Can you behave yourself while we're out, once ? That's all I'm asking."

(He won't, Alejandro takes every opportunity he can to gush about his partners)

Ugh and they have to drag/carry Noah everywhere cause he's on a different plane of relaxed <3<3<3 and he'll deny it afterwards but he enjoyed it a lot

[mcheang]

I have a prompt idea! So a rich kid transfers into DuPont who is the son of the prime minister or something. He can be bratty like Chloe and deceitful like Lila. The first thing he does is put Chloe in her place since her dad can’t do anything to him and exposes Lila as the liar she is with the help from his connections.But here’s the kicker, he has a massive crush on Marinette. But she has a massive crush on Adrien, someone he looks down on. Cue jealousy and retribution. Basically Adrien gaining an antagonist of his own because if he can have FOUR girls getting into a cat fight of her (two of whom are nasty bullies) then Marinette can have her own evil love interest. Bonus points if he is beginning to endear to Marinette after standing up to her bullies.

Remy Gusteau

Can you guess where I got his name? But I imagine him to look like Draco Malfoy if he has to keep saying “My father….” Lol

Your prompt is the first in a long while that has given my that old flair of imagination :D Thank you. Also, for anyone else who wants to send me a prompt, note I have not watched the latest season yet as I am waiting for all episodes to air first. So no spoilers please.

The only reason Remy even agreed to go to Paris after the rise of Hawkmoth was because it was the capital of gastronomy.

Even so, he refused to stay as a guest at the Le Grand Paris. There is no way he is staying in the same hotel as that bully Chloe. Honestly why Ladybug even let her remain a hero after she purposefully endangered a train full of Parisians is beyond him. And ever since he saw her purposefully sabotage a cooking show, he has been asking his father why her father was even still mayor if he could not even raise his daughter properly.

Even so, the mayor personally welcomed Remy at the airport.

Mayor: my daughter attends Dupont too, she can be your tour guide.

Remy: I certainly hope she learned to improve her personality. It doesn’t look good on France if the mayor of our capital has a bully for a daughter.

The mayor paled at the threat. “Of course she has improved. Why else would Ladybug give her a miraculous again?”

Remy: I guess we’ll see.

Later that night, Andre begged his daughter to be on her best behavior because otherwise, it might cost him his job.

Naturally Chloe was appalled. She started to protest when even her mother agreed with Andre. “It would never do for my darling to lose his job. All Chloe has to do is act nice in front of the prime minister’s boy, right? That’s easy to do. Chloe, if you can’t handle even this much, ask your sister for advice.”

The next day Chloe went out of her way to greet Remy and did not even give Sabrina orders…only to be ignored by Remy.

Ugh. Who did he think he is?

Sabrina: Um, the prime minister’s son?

The only seat left available was next to Ivan, right in front of Lila.

As Caline told Remy that Marinette would be his tour guide, Lila volunteered instead.

Lila: Oh, I can do it. As the ambassador’s daughter, I’m sure Marinette would has a lot to do anyway.

Marinette scowled at Lila. And she wasn’t the only one.

Remy himself was not happy. He recognised Marinette because of her parents and uncle. He had actually been looking forward to discuss recipes with her. Why did that nobody have to butt in?

Well that nobody was Lila, and clearly she never heard of personal space. For someone supposed to be giving a tour of the classrooms and teachers, she sure talked a lot about herself instead.

Don’t tell him that everybody actually indulged her like this?

Later that day, after class ended, he asked Caline why she does not try reining in Lila’s tall tales.

Caline: Lila has a special disease. She didn’t want her classmates to see her differently because of it.

Remy stared cooly at this dumb woman. “Hmm. Do you know something, I’ve heard the other students tell me I was in the akuma class. I thought perhaps it might be due to Chloe but perhaps you have something to do with it too. I wonder if I should ask my father to bring an inspector here.”

Caline: If you think it’s needed. I have only ever encouraged my students to forgive each other.

Remy: right, which is why you never told your class they were being lied to by Lila and denied them the chance to forgive her.

True to his word, Remy did bring an inspector around, and was he thorough! Marinette’s previous expulsion case was brought up and both Damocles and Caline were fired for mishandling the case. Remy even forced them to apologize to Marinette. Some, including Adrien, might protest this was harsh, but Remy drily pointed out that Caline’s method of forgiving bullies without punishing them was called enabling. Did she expect them to forgive Hawkmoth too? And Damocles is not supposed to turn school property into some cheap owl cave, nor punish the school for Chloe’s misdeeds. They were like children in the bodies of adults.

Oh, and Lila was exposed too. She had to confess her special ability to the whole school, outing her as someone who likes to tell tall tales.

Understandably, akumas appeared. Curiously though, they never got much chance to cause chaos. Mainly because the no-nonsense inspector and Remy struck them in the head once the transformation had finished, giving them no time to react, and proceeded to keep hitting them till they passed out.

Everyone stared at them.

Remy: What? The miraculous cure will fix everything.

And Remy finally got to discuss baking with Marinette! He just didn’t understand why she was so fixated on Adrien Agreste. The model reminded Remy of Caline, always about forgiving bullies. Spoken like someone who has never been bullied himself!

He just has to help Marinette see that Adrien isn’t worth her time. Some planned situations to show how useless the boy is. Good thing he has the mayor’s daughter at his beck and call. And he just knows she is dying to be mean again.

[lovelytsunoda]

emergency contact // mercedes ( ii )

summary: in the sequel to 'you're on your own kid', y/n makes the first step in breaking out of her shell and overcoming her anxiety by attending her first race with the mercedes team. unfortunately for her, all it takes is four hours and a few text messages with a certain f2 driver to make things all come crashing down again.

things that i want, this happily ever after, you choke on your words just to swallow them after, asleep on the couch while you're passed out in the back, i just want you to be my emergency contact

pairing: platonic! mercedes amg f1 x reader, brief liam lawson x reader (unrequited)

warnings:anxiety and loneliness, fear of dying alone. unrequited love & miscommunication between liam and y/n, this one drags the f2 idiots into this disaster, heavy drinking

author's note: all i have to say is i'm sorry for inflicting emotional pain on you guys through this series, because it's totally becoming a series: merc helping baby intern navigate being an adult.writing fics on tumblr is cheaper than going to therapy and makes me feel better than going to therapy does. that's a joke, by the way.

breathe, y/n. just breathe

that's the mantra that she repeats to herself as she walks into the paddock, watching the frantically moving figures scramble around in front of her. it was overwhelming, the atmosphere like something that she had never experienced before.

truth be told, it scared her a little bit.

"just breathe, beautiful. you're safe." angela cullen encouraged, putting a reassuring hand on the young law clerk's shoulder.

"there's a lot of people here." she laughed nervously as the pair kept walking towards the mercedes hospitality suite. "i forgot that the filthy rich fans are also allowed back here."

you don't belong here. the voice in her head was back, the one that made her want to curl back into herself. it took forever for her to get to the point where she agreed to come with the team to a race. it was just silverstone, something very much local because she was still too anxious to fly overseas. susie had thought that it would be a good way for her to get to know people within the motorsports world, a way to become more comfortable with herself and the mercedes team.

"you'll be fine." angela encouraged. "if you keep your head down and keep walking quickly, you'll be at the garage before you know it."

most of the week leading up to silverstone had been spent with nyck, susie and angela, as george, toto and lewis were so busy getting race-ready. they'd done a day in london all as a team, a film camera sitting in her backpack was filled with pictures of her and the drivers doing all of the cheesy touristy things.

it had been the best week of her life.

but she knew that once it was over, it was back to normalcy. back to frozen tesco pizza and reruns of 'benidorm'. of course, her life had improved vastly since lewis and george had welcomed her into the group. she's started having monthly girls nights with susie and angela, and sometimes naomi schiff came along as well. they'd get their nails done and go out for dinner and drinks. it got y/n out of the house, and it made her feel like she was a part of something.

this was a feeling she had been chasing since she graduated high school.

a feeling that almost made the pain of watching all of her old friends move on with their lives: getting boyfriends and girlfriends, moving in with their partners, going out every other night with their large friend groups, and even getting married.

and it really hurt her to watch, knowing that everyone else was moving on but she was still stuck in the same place.

really, she just wanted to be loved.

"hey, kiddo!" toto waved to her as she and angela went into the garage.

the austrian had become a proper substitute for her father now that she was living on her own. all that toto wanted was for y/n to feel secure and comfortable with her job at the team. he was constantly making sure that she felt included, sometimes letting her in on things that not even the lawyers got to see just yet. despite his imposing appearance and his brash attitude, he was a big softie.

"hey, toto." she exhaled a breath, leaning in to give the team principal a hug. "thanks for inviting me along, really."

"anytime. hopefully this has been a good week for you, and maybe you'll consider coming to some of the races that are further from home, a little more outside of that comfort zone of yours?"

"i hope so too." she smiled sadly. "where do you need me today?"

"it's qualifying today, so we need all hands on deck. we've been struggling a little with pace this weekend, but i think we have a shot at the front row." toto began, passing y/n a set of headphones. "usually the crew who aren't needed during the qualifying brackets hang out in the back. i think george's girlfriend is back there too, if you'd feel more comfortable around carmen."

"thank you, toto. really, i don't think i can say it enough." y/n gushed, twirling the cord for the headphones around her ring finger.

toto smiled. "any time, kid."

she walked to the back corner of the garage, talking to some of the engineers and a few of the pit crew members on her way. the crew had welcomed her with open arms. she couldn't remember a time when she had felt more loved, but the void was still there.

she ached to be loved romantically. to be understood, treasured. for another person to want to spent the rest of his life by her side. to one day get dressed up in a nice white dress, and walk down the aisle in an old cathedral or a castle or a library and officially spend the rest of her life with someone she loved by her side.

"good luck out there, lewis." she tried to push the usual existential crisis out of her mind, giving the right-time world champion a tight hug before moving on to george, who could drape his whole lanky body over her if he tried. "you too, russell george. go kick some red bull ass, yeah?"

"you can bet we'll try!" george laughed.

"hey, if you get overwhelmed at all, the back door is right there." lewis said softly, nodding his head in the direction of a heavy metal door hidden in the wall, a fluorescent exit sign posted above.

"as long as you stick with carmen, you'll be in good hands." george agreed. "just stay within your comfort zone, don't push yourself too much."

"that was the plan. being here is out of the comfort zone enough. good luck, guys." she said again, moving to stand next to carmen montero in the back of the garage.

whenever she went to events where susie wasn't around and the drivers were busy, she always found herself gravitating towards carmen. she barely knew george's girlfriend except for the fact that carmen was normal and hardworking just like she was and that this world as as new to carmen as it was to y/n.

the first qualifying session ended, and the cars returned to the garages while the commentators reset the clock. the merc garage was suddenly a hub of activity, and y/n couldn't help but notice how her anxiety was spiking as she took off the headphones and reached for her purse.

"everything okay?" carmen asked softly, putting a hand on her shoulder.

y/n nodded. "just need some breathing room. i'm going to run and get a hot chocolate from hospitality. do you want anything?"

carmen shook her head. "don't worry about me, love."

y/n slipped out of the garage through the back door, pulling her aviator sunglasses over her eyes against the british sun. there was a slight breeze in the paddock that had her pulling the sleeves of her sweater over her knuckles. the paddock was calmer now, save for the five drivers who hadn't made it through to q2 hanging their heads as they made their way back to their hospitality suites.

"hi, y/n!" alexander albon waved, a bright smile on his face. she'd only ever met alex once or twice, because the williams driver was so close with george. but alex had welcomed her immediately.

"hey, alex. it's a pity about q1."

"eh, i drive a williams." alex shrugged. "what can you do?"

as alexander headed back towards the williams garage, y/n headed towards the hot chocolate vendor, lining up behind mechanics and engineers, hospitality workers and pr reps who were trying to warm up from the cold. though the calendar declared that it should have been the summer, it felt like the spring, a damp kind of cold seeping into everybody's bones.

as she walked back to the garage with a paper cup warming her hands, she stopped to talk to a group of boys sitting on a patio table near the mercedes hospitality suite after frederik vesti waved her over.

fred had driven in f2 that morning, a qualifying that saw him starting in the middle of the pack.

"oi, fred, don't you have a debreif to be at?" y/n joked, playfully pushing him in the side as she took a seat next to him at the table.

"oh, fuck off." the junior driver laughed. "y/n, this is dennis, liam, clement, marcus and jack, they're some of my mates from f2."

as the boys waved at her one by one, she knew exactly why frederik had waved her over.

he was trying to get her to make friends.

"so, what brings someone like you out to the paddock? i don't think that we've seen you 'round here before." the blond that fred had pointed out as liam spoke first.

he had a kiwi accent that made y/n's legs go weak, her heart beating faster in her chest as she nervously combed her hair behind her ear. "i work in the legal department. i don't know a lot about how things actually work around here, i just help file the paperwork for it."

"oh, so she's a smart one." clement cheered, raising his glass of sprite for a toast. "we need more people like you around here."

talking to the boys gradually became easier. it was a relief for y/n, to see that people were so thrilled about having her around, that they seemed to like her so quickly, with no strings attached. people who wouldn't expect anything from her, but just enjoyed talking to her.

it felt amazing to be appreciated, to be liked by people who weren't obligated to.

"i should head back. q2 is almost over, and i should see if toto needs me." she said, raising her voice slightly to be heard over the laughter from one of clement's jokes. "but this has been really great, guys. really."

"what's your instagram?" marcus asked, pulling his phone out of his pocket. "we'll put you in the group chat." he passed her the phone, not missing the way that her face lit up as she searched for her own profile in the app, adding herself to marcus' f2 group chat.

"we were all going out later." liam added. "it's nothing much, just a way to decompress before the weekend starts. you're more than welcome to join us, if you wanted to."

"really?" she couldn't stop her face from breaking out in a grin. "i wouldn't want to trouble you guys."

"it's no trouble. i insist."

"okay. text me the details, and i'll be there."

________

the evening rolled around fast. she stood in front of the closet mirror in her room of the rented mercedes villa, running her hands over her thighs before proceeding to scrutinize the rest of her appearance in the mirror. frederik had promised to drive her, and she wanted to be ready before he threw on some cologne and grabbed his car keys from the kitchen counter.

there was a soft knock on her door, and after y/n gave permission for the person on the other side to open it, susie wolff stepped into the room.

“you look great, kiddo.” she said with a smile. “remember to have fun tonight, okay? just be yourself.”

“in the past, that hasn’t exactly worked out for me.” y/n sighed, rolling up the sleeves of her form/fitting long sleeves shirt to spray her arms with a bath and body works spray.

“and if you feel like coming home early, don’t hesitate to call me or angela, alright hon?”

y/n laughed, reaching for the small quartz necklace she had draped over the airbnb's dresser. she'd be lying if she said she wasn't nervous. although marcus, clement, liam and dennis seemed to like her, she was still nervous about going out with them all, being thorwn headfirst into a night out with a group of drivers that have spotty reputations.

"thanks, susie. for everything." and she truly meant it. the wolff's had been so important into making her field placement feel like home, and not just another thing she needed to do to get her diploma.

she followed susie downstairs, where frederik was talking to one of the engineers, a glass of sparkling water in his hand and a set of keys dangling from his fingers.

"ready to go?" the frenchman asked, pushing away from the counter. "marcus is wondering where we are."

"hang on, hang on." nyck de vries laughed, cutting the junior driver off midsentence. "it's baby's first night out! we need to remember this!"

the intern rolled her eyes. the entire scenario reminded her of how her parents acted when she went to prom. susie backed away and y/n attempted to pose against the cinnamon colored wall as toto got his phone out. she locked eyes with nyck behind the counter, mouthing the words 'fuck you, shortass' before going back to smiling at toto.

"have fun tonight, kiddo." lewis said with a bright smile, his voice calming her down as the seven time world champion patted her gently on the shoulder. "and please try and stop frederik from doing something stupid."

"oi!" fred shouted through laughter. "come on, we should get going before clement gets too drunk."

"don't scare the poor girl!" toto scolded. "you will be fine. and if any of them do anything you don't like, i'll have words with them."

________

the club was hazy, shrouded in purple lights. the drivers had rented out a private room in the back corner of the building. her chest felt tighter as she followed frederik, the anxiety beginning to set in.

fred reached for her hand. "you've got this. they don't bite. clem is a little feral, but if you're firm with him he'll leave you alone."

she nodded. "okay. here goes nothing."

when the door opened, she had to take a minute to take in what was happening. clement novalak and dennis hauger were doing shots at a table in the middle of the room while the rest of the f2 grid were gathered around them (save for a brazilian with a mane of hair who was sitting in the corner, making out with a girl of about twenty) chanting 'shots, shots, shots' before dennis tapped out and clement howled with victory.

oh dear lord, what am i doing here? she wondered, taking in the chaos unfolding in front of her.

"hey, dickheads!" fred shouted. "i want you to meet someone!"

activity around the table stilled, dennis and clement cheering when they say y/n.

and she'd be lying if she said that their enthusiasm didn't make her feel a little warm and fuzzy on the insides.

"woah, she's hot." a swiss guy with curls of blonde hair framing his face looked over, slurring his words slightly. he was likely the drunkest out of all of them, a vape pen sticking out of his jeans pocket.

"fuck off, ralph! she's the same age as dennis, don't make this weird." marcus laughed, stealing one of the remaining shots from dennis' side of the table.

"that's ralph boshung, he's our version of fernando alonso. he's twenty-five and he's shite, but he brings camps money." dennis laughed, throwing one tattooed arm over y/n's shoulders. "he's a dick, but he's harmless."

"pleasure." she croaked as she moved closer to the table. "now who'd everybody else?"

"right, so that's roy, logan, jehan, amaury, marino, enzo, richard, theo, ayumu, zane, calan, olli, the one in the corner there is felipe-"

that's too many people. she felt overwhelmed, but she wasn't quite sure how to tell dennis that. some of the guys she recognized from the pictures they used as their profile pictures on the group chat, and others she'd never seen before.

"do you want a shot?" clement asked, draping his body over hers as he held the small tequila glass in front of her face.

"i'm good." she said calmly, shaking her head as she sat down in the booth, taking a seat next to who she assumed was zane maloney. "i don't really drink, can't stand the taste of alchohol."

zane snorted. "smart choice. trust me, these lot do a lot of funny shit when they're drunk."

"clem is a riot when he's wine drunk. he'll start randomly speaking french, or change his accent midsentence." jehan added with a laugh. "it's so fucking funny."

the song playing outside changed, and the boys let out a cheer.

"boys, to the dance floor!" ralph yelled, pointing towards the door as he slipped his sunglasses on his face for no other reason than to try and look cool.

and suddenly the room was practically empty: a mjorty of the drivers had departed for the dance floor, felipe's woman had vanished, and suddenly there were only four of them in the room: felipe, y/n, dennis and marcus.

"you two don't usually stay behind when those idiots go to make bad decisions and piss their trainers off." felipe remarked, looking at marcus and dennis. "are you sure you're all right?"

marcus shrugged. "we don't want y/n sitting in here on her own, do we? that's not why we invited her out."

"thank you, for that. i'm not a club kind of person, in case you couldn't already notice. too many people, too many things going on. it overwhelms me."

"no worries!" dennis insisted. "trust me, you don't want to be out there right now anyways. do you want anything to drink, even just like a soda or something?"

"a sprite would be nice."

"get the woman a sprite!" felipe shouted, shoving the two other driver's out of the booth. "go on, what are you lads here for?"

they all laughed as marcus and dennis fought over who would have the horror of walking over to the bar and ordering the soft drink. dennis ended up losing, the norwegian cursing jokingly at marcus before he slipped out of the room, music still shaking the drywal.

all throughout the night, the drivers seemed to rotate staying with y/n, keeping her company or splitting a plate of fries with her. they all genuinely seemed like nice people and she was almost glad that she had let frederik convince her that coming out tonight was a good idea.

"you should dance!" liam insisted, stealing the last greasy french fry from the ceramic plate. "come on, what are you so scared of?"

"uh, making a fool out of myself? ending up on a formula two gossip page? or worse, a wags page where the comments section get into fights with each other trying to figure out which one of you idiots i was here with in the first place and who i went home with or who i had a threesome with?"

liam cackled. "does your brain ever slow down?"

"not at all." she answered, dead serious. her brain was a very scary place to be.

"come on, get out of your head for a little bit. you only live once, baby merc."

y/n grinned, hoping that the dim lights did something to hide the blush on her face. "baby merc? did frederik tell you that toto calls me that?"

"he might have mentioned it." liam grinned, his eyes sparkling with mischief. "so, what do you say?"

y/n shook her head, crossing her arms before leaning back in her seat. "i don't even like this kind of music."

liam raised an eyebrow. "that can be easily fixed."

she was about to say something back when she finally recognized one of the songs on the stereo. when 'spice up your life' by the spice girls started to play, she couldn't stop her face from breaking into a grin.

"come on now, you have to dance!" liam insisted as the door slid open and clement novalak came in, sashaying his hips as he walked up to the tables.

"it's the spice girls!" the frenchman shouted. "you are legally obligated to dance, baby merc!"

with both clement and liam trying to convince her, there wasn't any fight left to try and talk them, or herself, out of it. "fine. you guys get one song. one."

she said one song, but the way she felt when she finally got out there, dancing with the group of boys, singing the spice girls at the top of their lungs as liam took her by the hand. she felt alive, a smile threatening to tear her skin apart.

she took out her phone, swiveling the camera to face them all as they screamed the chorus, the boys drunk and sweaty and rambunctious, a glow over her skin that she didn't recognize.

the glow of confidence and contentment.

________

when she and fred got back to the villa, she felt giddy as she ran back up the stairs to her room, kicking off her shoes and flopping back on the bed, clutching the cool screen of her phone to her chest.

while she felt this high, like she was walking on air, there was something she needed to do.

to liam: hey liam! big thanks for inviting me out with you guys tonight. i had an incredible time and it was nice getting to know you. i was wondering if maybe you wanted to get together for a coffee or something during a race weekend?

she pressed send with her eyes screwed shut. it was the riskiest text she could remember sending. she dropped the phone, getting back to her feet and busying herself while she waited for liam to text her back, stopping her hands from shaking from worry.

she changed out of her clubbing clothes, dressing in flannel pajama bottoms and an oversized shirt for a band that she went to see when she was in her freshman year of high school.

oh how things had changed for her since then. she should be proud of herself, she knew. but some days she didn't feel like she had moved on from that stuffy london secondary school.

her phone vibrated on the bed, and she braced herself for the worst, even as she lunged faster than the speed of light to grasp the device in her hands.

and then she felt her stomach drop, the bad feeling spreading through her bones as she felt like she couldn't support her body weight on her own any more.

rejection.

from liam: heyyyyyy.....i had a great time with you today as well, and you seem like a really nice person, and i really hate to be the one to burst your bubble like this, but i'm already seeing someone. her name is olivia, i met her back in new zealand.

she was now three for three, and more concerned that she was going to die alone than ever.

______

"she's been out there a while." george russell said slowly, nodding his head in the direction of the back dec. it was dark outside, the stars visible above the trees. "frederik, what happened when you guys were out? who do we have to hurt?"

fred shook his head. "i have no idea. she was having a great time, dancing with liam and clement. the boys were tripping over each other to talk to her, make her feel welcome. whatever happened must have happened after we came back."

the mercedes drivers looked out the patio door again, hearts aching at the sight of y/n leaning over the deck railing, a sad and despondent expression on her face.

"i'm going to go and talk to her." lewis said, getting to his feet and sliding the door open.

his heart ached for the girl who so badly wanted to leave her mark on the world. the girl who was scared of dying alone at such a young age, scared she'd never be loved or treasured. scared that she would be alone for the rest of her life, that everything was simply temporary.

"y/n, are you alright?"

"he's seeing someone else. i finally thought i had a fucking chance to be loved, and he's seeing someone else." her voice broke, a single salty tear beginning to make it's track down the pale expanse of her skin. and as that first one fell, more and more followed. "am i unlovable, lewis?"

and that's when lewis felt his heart break. y/n was too young to feel the pain of the world, the pain of heartache. he knew what it was like to bleed love into the world and not get enough back. to still feel that void inside of you.

"don't say that, love. you are not unlovable. he just wasn't the right person for you. do you want to talk about it?"

"not really."

"that's fine." he was standing next to her now, looking out at the backyard and the trees. y/n looked so small, hiding behind the old concert shirt that was four sizes too big, but that she had bought that way because she was already paying too much for it, so it might as well last her four or five years of growth.

"but know that this is not a reflection on you. this is all on him. and you put yourself out there tonight. that must have been a massive step for you. you should be proud of yourself, even though it's hurting right now."

she caught a shadow moving behind her out of the corner of her eye, hearing the deck creak under the weight of footsteps.

"who was it?" toto wolff's voice was deep, tinged with anger that someone had decided to cross his favorite intern. the one that he thought of as family as much as he did his own three kids. in fact, he had considered introducing y/n and benedict, as they were at a similar age and he knew that she could use a friend. "i don't care who he is or what driver's academy he's in, i just want to have a little chat with him."

y/n laughed, shaking her head as she pictured toto storming into the red bull garage to yell at poor liam for hurting his favorite intern. "you don't have to do that. i need to learn how to deal with these things on my own."

lewis turned his head, giving her and understanding look. "remember we're here if you need us, okay? you never have to go through something like this alone again."

"oi, is there another party that i never got invited to?" george proclaimed, making his presence known on the deck. the group laughed, remembering the day they had all met, the day they became what they were today, when y/n had been sobbing on the rocks by the factory parking lot.

"just needed a little cheering up, that's all." she said, resting her head against toto's arm. "it's been a day. too many emotions for me to handle."

she thought again about liam's text, a stab of pain ricocheting through her heart. she just had to trust that things were going to work themselves out, because sometimes that was the onyl thing that there was to do.

maybe it was time to take fate into her own hands. should she try a dating app? a speed dating event? god forbid she join a singles club.

"nyck just got out the scrabble board." george remarked off handedly. "between the four of us and carmen, i think we could kick some serious scrabble ass, don't you think?"

lewis laughed. "says the guy that only played three letter words last time we played."

"i didn't have y/n on my team." george proclaimed, placing his hands on the intern's shoulders. "she's the smart one here. so what do you say?"

y/n smiled. "deal me in. i'm gonna kick both your asses."

she'd worry about getting a boyfriend later. but for now, she had the best found family she could have ever asked for.

Tags:

@libraryofloveletters @magnummagnussen @sidcrosbyspuck @scuderiamh @diorleclerc @daydreamingleclerc

[bibbityboppitybillyharvgrove]

Always There - Chapter Eleven: S.Snape

Summary: Y/N Potter was left with a baby to care for after her brother and sister-in-law were murdered by Voldemort. One person was there for her, a person she didn’t expect but soon became her comfort person, Severus Snape. During Harry’s third year at Hogwarts and her third year as Herbology professor, a few old friends come around again. Y/N has to handle the feelings of these old friends being around again as well as handle her feelings for a certain potions master all while she tries to hide these things from her godson.

Series Masterlist

My full Masterlist

Pairings: Severus Snape x Female Professor Reader, Potter!Reader x friend!Remus, Sister!Reader x James Potter, Potter!Reader x Friend!Sirius

Chapter Warnings: Female Reader, Potter Reader(No physical description of reader) probably shitty writing, Harry growing up in a loving home, death, mentions of sad Snape, Voldemort, death eaters, profanity, sad reader, mentions of reader not taking care of herself, mentions of not eating, smoking cigarettes, Sev is a bad listener

Series Warnings: Female Reader, Potter Reader (No physical description of reader) probably shitty writing, OOC Snape, Harry grows up in a loving environment, mentions of death and murder, poorly written angst, Remus is a shitty friend, poorly written pining,

Please let me know how I can improve my writing and being more inclusive to POC as I am whiter than white. Please also let me know if I have to add more to the warnings! My messages are open as well as my asks!

I am starting a taglist so leave either a comment or something in my asks if you would like to be tagged in any of my works or just this series!

Author's Note: I am going through a bit of a writers block at the moment so please bare with me. If anyone has any ideas they can give me I will gladly take some to see if I can get over this writers block.

Please let me know how I can improve or if you find any errors! Correct me, don't be afraid to! I want to improve my writing and become a better writer so any feedback or advise is welcomed!

Word Count: 2052

My asks are open for questions, suggestions and feedback!

Feedback is welcomed and encouraged!

Enjoy!

not my gif

not my gif

The Potters and Severus left the house the next day, all going to 12 Grimmauld Place, the two professors attending the Order meeting and Harry getting to see his friends. Once they had arrived, Molly was the first one to greet the three of them at the door. She ushered Harry up the stairs and the professors into the dining room where the meeting was being held. This was the first meeting that Y/N was able to attend since the Order had restarted. Most of the meeting was about keeping Harry safe and protected. 

“How is he doing, dove?” Remus had asked her.

“He could be better, he’s been having nightmares every night. Harry is struggling to simplify it, he watched someone die right in front of him and then had to fight Voldemort all by himself, it's a lot for a young boy,” She explained.

“What have you been doing to get him to sleep? Do sleeping draughts work?” Sirius chimed in.

“We’ve tried sleeping draughts but it makes the nightmares harder for him to come out of. He’s been sleeping in my bed since the beginning of the summer. Even then he has nightmares but at least I’m right there to help him.” With the end of the conversation, the meeting had ended, the members who weren’t staying had left and the rest had stayed. The kids were all upstairs waiting for dinner, Y/N eventually calling Harry down early so he could catch up with Remus and Sirius. She hadn’t seen the boy that happy all summer which made her heart ache. She excused herself from the room to go sit outside for some fresh air.

Severus was about to follow her but Remus wordlessly told him to stay, following her out. She was sitting on the top step with a cigarette lit in her hand. “I thought you quit when you left school?” Remus questioned as he sat beside her on the step.

“I did but after last year with the triwizard tournament and Harry’s nightmares, I started again. It’s the only way I’ve been able to stay sane. I haven’t been able to sleep, I can barely eat, it’s like I haven’t been able to turn off, you know?” She vented to her friend as she took a puff from the tobacco in her hand.

“Dove, I thought Severus talked to you about taking care of yourself. Give me that.” He took the cigarette from her hand, inhaling some smoke before putting it out and throwing it onto the pavement. 

“He did but with all of the stress in my life, I haven’t been able to even think about taking care of myself. My nephew has been attacked every year he’s been at Hogwarts and it’s only getting worse. Voldemort is back, the death eaters have started their meetings, I’ve barely seen Severus, I’ve barely left the house, I’ve barely slept, I’ve barely eaten, most of my plants are dying. My life has been a mess since James died, I’ve had no order in my life since that night.” 

It took everything in Remus to not scold her. He knew that a lecture was the last thing she needed, that she wouldn’t benefit from one at the moment. “Let’s go in to eat something, and then after you eat, you are going to bed, you need to rest. You can’t take care of Harry if you haven’t taken care of yourself. You want a piece of chocolate?” He held out a chocolate bar he’d been breaking pieces off of during the meeting. She broke off a piece and ate it, leaning into Remus’ side as she chewed. 

“I miss them,” Y/N whispered, Remus knew she was talking about James and Lily, wrapping his arm around her shoulder and resting his head on top of hers.

“Me too, dove, me too,” He sighed. The door had opened and closed, neither of the bothering to turn around to see who it was.

“Dovey time without me? Moony, how dare you?” Sirius joked as he sat beside Remus. Y/N reached over for Sirius who gave her his hand and squeezed it. Sirius leaned his head onto Remus’ shoulder as well as the three sat in silence. They sat out there until Molly had peeked her head out to tell the trio it was time to eat. It took a few minutes for the three of them to get up and make their way into the house. She took her place next to Severus, expecting Harry to sit beside her but the boy sat beside his godfather instead.

“You okay, darling?” Severus asked her softly, watching as she pushed food around her plate instead of eating.

“I’m fine, honey. Just not hungry,” She replied, giving him a small smile that didn’t reach her eyes. It was time for his heart to ache, not even a year before, she was bubbly and happy and now she was dull and in a constant state of sorrow and worry. Her hair that was once put together and taken care of, now a constant frizzy or oily mess. Her skin was even duller, once shining bright and full, her cheeks now sunken in and dark rings appearing under her eyes. She had lost a substantial amount of weight during the summer, everyone taking note of it and trying to get her to eat to no avail. She was never hungry anymore, instead she was always tired and worried, hoping that her nephew would be okay and safe even though she knew that those chances were slim to none with the return of Voldemort.

“Dovey, it’s your favorite, why aren’t you eating?” Sirius asked her from across the table, all eyes turning to her in an instant.

“Just not hungry, I think I’m gonna go to bed actually,” She dismissed herself from the table, handing her plate to Kreacher, thanking the house elf, before making her way up the stairs to the room she was staying in. She pulled another cigarette from the pack and sat by the window as she lit it. As she smoked the cigarette, downstairs in the dining room, the table had fallen silent.

Severus let out a heavy sigh as he sat back in his chair, everyone's eyes now turning to him. “What are you all looking at me for?” He questioned them all.

“What’s going on with her? She’s not herself Severus and you know it. She looks like she hasn’t slept in weeks, she’s lost a lot of weight, it’s not healthy,” Molly questioned him.

“She hasn’t been sleeping well, which I just found out myself. She’s stressed out of her mind, she needs a break from everything but she doesn’t allow herself to have that break. I’ve barely had time to see her since the Order started back up, she’s by herself taking care of a boy who is wanted by every dark wizard you can name,” Severus was upset with himself because the Order had taken up so much of his time, he left Y/N all by herself to care for the boy who lived.

It had taken everything in Severus to not scream at everyone, he felt like they were blaming Y/N’s state on him when there wasn’t anything he could do, he tried his damndest to make her feel better but it hadn’t worked. Nothing that anyone did helped her in any way, her only concern was Harry, he is her boy, he is her sole responsibility, he is hers to keep safe and care for and that is what she felt like she did best. But once he began to get targeted, she realized that trying her best wasn’t good enough, she spent hours every night putting protection charms on their home, keeping dangerous plants around for defense if needed and staying up all night just in case something were to happen. The night before was the first time she had actually slept for more than an hour at a time, she slept for maybe 3 hours total before she eventually woke up and put the protection on the house. 

Severus had excused himself from the table before making his way upstairs to where he knew Y/N was. She was still sitting by the window, looking out at the muggles as they walked by. She still had a lit cigarette in her hand, taking a puff when Severus had walked in. “I didn’t know you smoked,” He said, startling her slightly.

“Thought I kicked the habit but apparently not,” She replied, her eyes still watching out the window. He made his way to the window and sat beside her.

“Are you okay?”

“I’m fine.”

“Don’t lie to me,” He said sternly.

“I’m not lying Sev, I’m fine,” She replied in the same tone.

“Y/N Potter, I don’t appreciate being lied to and you know that. Talk to me! I’m right here! You aren’t fine!” He was yelling at this point, he just wanted answers from her. He wanted the truth from her, he wanted to know how he could help.

“Don’t yell at me, Severus Snape! I told you that I am fine! Just leave it at that!”

“No, because you are going to end up killing yourself if you keep it up and I can’t lose you! Harry can’t lose you! Lupin can’t and Black and the Weasley’s! We can’t lose you so tell me what's wrong!” She finally turned to him and got up, him following suit. Her eyes were watery but she was biting back the tears.

“Everything! Everything is wrong! My brother died and my life went to shit! My brother died and part of me died with him! My nephew is being targeted by every dark wizard out there and there’s nothing I can do! My nephew is having nightmares every single night and there is nothing I can do! My nephew is happier here than he has been with me all summer! I can’t handle it all at once! It’s too much, I can't do it anymore! The only thing in my life that has gone right is you! So please just leave me alone before I fuck it up and cause myself more misery!” She screamed at him, a few tears falling from her eyes.

“I’m not leaving you,” Severus stated bluntly, his volume lowering substantially.

“Get out, please. Just get out,” She begged, “I need to be alone, please just leave me alone.”

Before Severus could open his mouth again, Remus had come in to diffuse the situation. “Lupin, your great savior is here to save the day as always. I am not leaving you alone,” Severus was getting frustrated. He just wanted to help but she wasn’t letting him.

“Severus, please just go, she’s asked you to leave more than once, just go,” Remus spoke up, defending his best friend. 

“What? So you can have her all to yourself? No, I am not leaving her. She is the love of my life and I am not going anywhere until I know how to help her,” Severus fought back.

Severus and Remus continued to argue, Y/N sitting back down, her knees pulled to her chest, her forehead resting on her knees and her hands covering her ears. “Everyone needs to get out! Everyone needs to leave me alone! I want to be alone! Get out! GET OUT!” She finally snapped after listening to the bickering for way too long. Both men looked at her, then at each other before leaving the room, finally listening to her. 

As soon as they had left, she put herself in bed, covering herself with the blanket and blankly staring at the window. She felt the need to cry but she couldn’t, it was almost as if her body wasn’t allowing her to cry. Forcing her to ‘stay strong’ for Harry even though he had the Weasley’s, Hermione, Severus, Sirius and Remus. There were plenty of people that could care for him but she felt like she had to, even if she couldn’t care for herself she could still try her hardest to take care of her boy. She had promised her brother and she wouldn’t break that promise, not now, not ever.

taglist (if your user is crossed out it means I can't tag you)

@acupnoodle @chxelsxaa @fluffyrat365 @fanficwriter5 @atanukileaf @v3lv3tvampir3 @jspidey5 @mija-novella @leo4242564 @crazyunsexycool @livillain00

[hologramcowboy]

Okay, well, Jensen finally showed up on television again. This time, playing Russell Shaw on Tracker. I'm curious if you watched and what you think of his performance.

Personally, it felt like Dean Winchester never left. It didn't help that there were numerous (and obvious) SPN easter eggs in the episode. I'm curious if that's happened before when guest stars come on. Do the writer's play up that actor's previous roles as much as they did Jensen's?

I'm also curious about a few tweets I saw from people who attended the FBBC event. Apparently, Jensen talked about his role on Tracker.

https://twitter.com/kunerksterphoto/status/1789808856576487771 and https://twitter.com/kunerksterphoto/status/1789808858505888136

I know we get dude in #Tracker tonight, so a little story. I wore my “I Miss Dean” shirt to the brewery event last weekend and as soon as dude saw it he was like “you know that episode of Tracker I did? I asked how they saw me playing it and they told me to do what I know best. So if you miss Dean, you’re going to get quite a bit of Dean on Tracker because he’s what I do best.” So it was a conscious choice and I am so excited by this.

https://twitter.com/kgauck/status/1789821196839637236

He told me I'd probably see a lot of Dean in his role on Tracker. I joked that he was dressed a lot like Dean in the promo pics, and then he made a joke about being typecast.

It sounds like Jensen's basically thrown in the towel on improving his craft since he apparently doesn't mind playing Dean in all his roles, or being typecast.

I read things like this and I can't imagine that he'll ever get another lead role. It's all going to be guest spots for characters that are similar to Dean Winchester. It's disappointing because he's definitely had the time post-SPN to take classes and improve between Covid and the strike. I suppose if he's happy doing guest spots and conventions, good for him, but as a sort-of fan/nearly former fan, I'm just sad to see his career come to this.

He's becoming a sad cliché. He is confusing a character for his main type and that is why he will never be A list and definitely never be Batman.

Thank you for this lovely post, anon.

I did tune in for the episode and, quite frankly, I was disappointed. Casting him seems to have been a gimmick, right down to the beer mentions.

First off, his acting initially seemed to be improved, right up until he started using that fake voice again then it all became cringe after cringe. I am so saddened that Jensen can't see past Dean and that he can't be himself. I know now that he'll never make it, an actor that stagnates can't ever reach A list.

Justin, in comparison, acts naturally, he has a natural instinct and this really just made Jensen look even faker. For the for the first time, Jensen played a completely meh character. He's turning into one of those dudes that star in various shows that no one even remembers because they are just there to advance the lead's plot. Right down to his superficial, mediocre, unnatural choices and I am sorry but in no way did he have the layers of someone who served in the army. That was a key characteristic of his character and he completely missed the plot on that and that's because the mention of it was a Soldier Boy easter egg. Jensen gets so caught up in flaunting his celebrity persona he forgets to embody his characters realistically.

I've read comments from AAs who claim Russell is different compared to Dean and I just want to say: gimmick casting, the whole script was written to callback to Dean, easter eggs included. Stop lying to yourselves and admit that Jensen has thrown in the towel. He is a one trick pony and that one trick will soon expire because, you know what? It's not an interesting character, it's not someone to root for, it's not someone fighting for something. It's a bored, self centered man faking a rougher inner and outer state and mimicking (yes, that's right, mimicking not acting) an idea of his old character. Mimicking poorly. As someone who loved Dean Winchester( when he was well written), I really need Jensen to stop because he is ruining the memory and disrespecting the legacy.

Thank you, anon, for sending me this ask and for asking my opinion, it pains me to say but I agree with you, lead roles aren't feasible.

[sparklyaxolotlstudent]

I love G3 with all my soul, heart, and assorted internal organs in elegant canopy jars, and their storytelling is an improvement over G1... But it still has some mistakes here and there, or things that make you go "wait..." Aka, fridge logic things...

Early on, is established that that Cleo is pretty much a hollowed out corpse, as most internal organs are outside of her, even some that don't make sense, like her inner ear, and the farthest she is from said jars, what the organ is for will start to fail, as, she would be meaner if she goes far from her heart, dumb if she goes far from her brain, clumsier if she's far from her inner ear, etc. This is repeated in several occasions, and she carries a bag with the jars to prevent this.

But there are several episodes where the bag or the jars are nowhere to be seen, even before she got the mummy amulet. I mean, we weren't told that was the reason, but I'm assuming having that amulet gives her more range to be far from her jars.

In Abbey's first episode, we are told that Yetis are pretty isolated and rare and for a time they were banned from attending Monster High, but that ban ended about 200 years ago, but neither Abbey nor her mom knew it, meaning, again, they were pretty isolated from monster society in general. Even Mommabominable didn't have a modern iCoffin. Come a more recent episode and it now turns out that Mommabominable is a famous and respected environmentalist. I thought at first that she had become quickly known after Abbey's introduction, but then it's revealed that she has worked with Heath's dad in the recent past, so it implies she has always been like this. (Not to mention Heath doesn't mention any of this in Abbey's first episode, and he is geeking out in the latter episode)

And lastly, in one episode we are shown Clawd human form, which comes with the full moon, and he has no trouble being in the shadow or inside their house, where the moonlight doesn't reach. But in another episode, both Barkimedes and Howleen only have human form while the moonlight is directly on them, with clouds and shadows showing to transform them back into werewolves.

And not a plot hole or anything, but since it's outright said that werecats can also become humans with the full moon (and it's implied to be sort of a puberty power) it would be cool if we saw Mouscedes or Tez showing their human forms, or at least talk about them, to confirm or debunk if all werebeast share this, or only wolves and cats do. (But it's also weird that neither Clawd nor Romulus appear in the episode)

[asordinaryppl]

A3! Main Story: Part 4 - Act 15: PAINFUL RE:BAKE - Episode 25: A Place To Belong And A Spark To Light That Fire

Taichi: Pretendin’ to be a Wolf is nasty work!

Banri: Seems like we’ve got a troublesome guy to deal with again.

Omi: He was wearing an Ouka High uniform, so I had an acquaintance from Gaku’s boxing club find some info.

Omi: It seems he’s a second year there, but he’s got a shaky attendance record and doesn’t always go home, preferring to spend the night at various other places.

Omi: They say he’s got an unapproachable aura and stands out in a bad way.

Omi: Zen-san also had someone look into it, and there’s no doubt that he’s the high school student that’s been going wild on the street these days.

Azami: I wonder if I’ve met him too, since he’s an Ouka High student.

Omi: He’s about your height, his hair has blond and pink highlights, and he also has a rather striking birthmark on his face.

Juza: An Ouka High student with a birthmark on his face…?

Sakyo: You know ‘im, Hyodo?

Juza: Nah…

Juza: (Could it be the guy who showed me the shop with the cheesecakes?)

Taichi: What do you wanna do, Omi-kun?

Omi: First, I want to get him to stop calling himself “Nachi of Wolf” and using violence.

Izumi: Right… It’ll give Nachi-san a bad reputation.

Omi: But the one time I tried to talk to him was a bust, so now I think I want to find a way to properly talk to him.

Azami: But he ain’t the type to sit and listen, is he?

Omi: Yeah. That’s why, if I can’t get through to him by talking, I was thinking of trying a different approach.

Omi: I want to try inviting him to our workshop.

Sakyo: The Action Workshop?

Omi: I don’t know how much of what he told me was true, but…

Omi: He said that fighting is his only method of communication, and that it’s something like his reason to live.

Omi: I’m aware I’m probably being meddlesome, but I was thinking whether I can’t help him change that reason to action, or acting.

Omi: My life changed because I found a place to belong in Wolf. When I joined this troupe and started acting, I found a purpose in life again.

Omi: If he can find a new purpose and a place to belong through acting, I think his life could change too.

Omi: I know that it’s easier said than done, but… I still want to do everything I can.

Omi: The same way Nachi called out to me all those years ago.

Banri: It might also be easier than ya expect it to be.

Banri: I know firsthand what it’s like to have your boring life changed by finding somethin’ that lights a fire within you.

Juza: Once you realize your strength can be used for stuff other than violence, you can definitely find something else to live for

Sakyo: That Karashina guy does remind me of Settsu before the Autumn Troupe was fully established.

Sakyo: The way Fushimi had Wolf, I was also saved by finding my place in Ginsenkai.

Sakyo: And, by joining MANKAI Company, I was once again saved by acting.

Sakyo: I’m sure everyone here understands just how having “a place to belong” and “something to light a fire within you”... can affect your life.

Azami: In that case, wouldn’t it be better if Omi-san simply focused on the Action Workshop?

Taichi: Right. I’ll also do my best to support you when the day comes!

Banri: And I’ll make sure to arrange the schedule in a way I can also participate.

Juza: I’ll ask Kabuto-san, too.

Omi: … I’m sorry for making it seem like I’m the only one with my head in the clouds when you guys are all working hard on your challenges.

Izumi: I think there are more ways to improve your acting than facing it.

Izumi: I’m sure all challenges you face in life can contribute to your growth as an actor.

Izumi: So now, I’d like you to try and believe in yourself, and give it your all in what you want to do.

Izumi: I think doing so will contribute to your personal growth, Omi-kun. And that will lead to you gaining new skills as an actor.

Taichi: We’ll all support you no matter what you wanna do!

Omi: Thank you…

-

Omi: …

Keiku: *Yawwwn*

Omi: Keiku.

Keiku: … Oho. If we’re fightin’, let’s go.

Omi: That’s not what I’m here for. I want to invite you to this.

[Paper rustling]

Keiku: … Whazzat?

Omi: You can’t fight, but you can do sword fighting.

Keiku: Sword fightin’... Ahh, just pretend fightin'. I ain’t interested.

Omi: There will also be someone stronger than you there. All you have to do is attend once.

Keiku: … As long as I can fight.

Omi: That’s still fine. You must absolutely come.

Keiku: …

[Keiku takes the flyer]

Omi: (I don’t know if I can change his way of thinking any, but I hope this’ll become a catalyst for him.)

previous episode | masterpost | next episode

[twistmusings]

hi! i’m so happy your requests are open! i love your blog :) i was wondering if you’d be comfortable writing how the dorm leaders would mourn for you if you died? i know that’s pretty angsty but angst is my favorite 💕 if you’re not comfortable with it, i totally understand! thanks either way!

Aw, thank you so much! I'm glad you've been enjoying it. I don't mind angst at all, though I may be a bit rusty, so hopefully this does it justice!

How would the Dorm Leaders mourn for MC if they died?

TW: Dark content, death, mourning, bad mental health and coping mechanisms, implied relationship but it could also be read as very intense friendship (just depends how you wanna view it!).

CW: Mentions of a major spoiler from book 6 in Idia's section. Please be careful of that and skip reading if you would like to avoid it!

Riddle Rosehearts

Riddle is convinced he must have done something horrible in a past life. His life was supposed to be getting better, right? He was supposed to be moving past the things that happened in the past with his mom and his isolation and be making moves to improve himself, right? So why was someone so important to him taken away from him so soon?

At first he couldn't bring himself to believe it-- it had to be some cruel prank. Despite him having attended their service... there was no way that they were gone. It had to be a joke and someday he would wake up and they would be there and they would be smiling and say "Gotcha!" and he would be mad but they would still be here and he could learn to forgive them someday.

And then that had not happened. Trey had told him that he was worried about him-- about how little reaction he seemed to have. Chenya came to check on him every few days to try and drag him out of the house, but he said to him that something had changed with that worried look on his face. People were tip-toeing around him again, he could see it.

It might take several weeks, but when it finally hits him, he snaps. He starts crying-- loud and ugly and miserable. He's inconsolable, and even though he has people there to help, no one is ever going to be able to fix this. He can't stop the tears, and they come on so randomly. He can't quite bring himself to be as put together as he always has been-- his hair is an unbecoming mess and his clothes don't sit on him right and he's exhausted to the point that he can barely hold himself up.

He has people to help him work through it, and he's so gracious for their support, but it's still going to take him a long, long time to be even be "okay" again.

Leona Kingscholar

Leona's first thought when it happened was that he should have known. He should have known because his life had always been this way. Happiness had always been dangled just outside of his reach, and yet somehow he had hoped this time would be different. He'd let his guard down enough that this hurt, it felt like someone was tearing a hole in his chest and it feels like a piece of him is missing now. He's hollow on the inside.

He shouldn't get his hopes up, and so he doesn't. Anything he loves or values is snatched away from him, so it's in his best interest to just stop caring about anything. It's what he'd been doing for years-- and what he should have kept doing because he wasn't allowed to know contentment. Maybe if he had, they would still be here.

He's starting to wonder if they really would be-- maybe he was cursed by someone as a cub and he would have to watch the people around him that he cares about wither and turn to sand whether he uses his unique magic or not. It's ironic, really, because it feels like every time he tries to find any light at the end of the tunnel that it slips through his hands just like sand.

So he sleeps. And he doesn't get up anymore, not unless someone pulls him physically. He can't find it in himself to care anymore, it's exhausting to constantly be disappointed and grieving. He doesn't have the energy and he can't muster it anymore. His body feels weak, like the only thing that was holding him together was momentum and their loss was the last straw and he was finally going to fall apart. It's so much easier to just sleep.

And at least when he's asleep there's still a chance he will get a chance to escape to somewhere where he's still allowed to feel hope. And maybe, if he's lucky, he'll get to see them again.

Azul Ashengrotto

It's like someone has cut a limb off of him. There isn't a better way to describe it-- it feels like someone has taken one of his legs and now he's left there to look at the place where it used to be and to know that something is missing... except, unlike his own limbs, this one won't regrow. It can never, ever regrow.

For a while, he throws himself into his work. He needs to fill the void with something, at it feels like his job and the Leech twins are all he has left to try and mend. And even the Leech twins sometimes look at him like he's broken-- look at him with such pity in their eyes and it takes him right back to that pathetic, small octopus that he was as a child. It makes him feel helpless, so when he notices Floyd behaving because he's worried, he tells him off. Likewise for Jade, when he notices that he's shying away from giving him a hard time. He expects them to be on the top of their game.

On some level, he knows it's unfair. It's unfair to them to expect that he should just be okay to move on like this. Unfair to himself to not give himself the time to mourn, and unfair to Jade and Floyd because they were also close to them. But if things don't feel normal, then he's going to fall apart. He just might overblot, again, if he has to sit and wallow in it. He needs to feel some semblance of normal. He needs it. Please.

But that's not how it works. It's not normal, because he's trying to ignore it. He's trying to push off having to deal with it until he feels well enough to deal with it and it backfires horribly.

It overwhelms him, one day in the lounge. Floyd and Jade are in the back room with him and they're chatting with each other. Azul hasn't really been listening to them-- he's trying to crunch the opening predictions and he doesn't need to know what they're saying. At least, not until he hears Floyd say Shrimpy, and suddenly it feels like Azul's lungs are collapsing. It feels like he can't breathe-- like his potion is failing and he can't breathe the air on land anymore. His grip tightens on his pen and his desk, fingers flexing so tightly against the wood that they go white. He feels like the walls are collapsing in around him, and though he can see the way the tears splash against the papers and desktop below him, his brain can't quite connect that he's crying. He's started crying.

"Azul?" It's Jade, and something about hearing him address him snaps Azul out of the hole he feels like he's falling into and everything snaps back to the present around him. Jade has this worried look on his face, and he's apparently had his hand on his shoulder. Azul is confused and overwhelmed, and all at once it's too much. He feels the sob wrack his body painfully, and he hiccups. It's like he's a cup and he's overflowing. He must look pathetic. Floyd and Jade move quickly, one on either side, arms around him in a hug and there's something soothing about feeling small and safe knowing that despite all of their ribbing, they won't abandon him here when he's at his lowest. And they stay until he stops crying.

He's lost a limb and it's never coming back, so he's going to have to learn how it is to live without it. It will take work and time, but he will learn to live without it someday, though he will never forget it.

Kalim Al-Asim

For one of the first times in his life, Kalim feels entirely lost. Hopeless and adrift, and since all he knows is showing his heart on his sleeve, he cries hard and repeatedly. The only person who he really lets near him is Jamil, and that's only because Jamil is too obstinate to let him self-destruct.

He can't pull himself out of bed. He feels like he's been run through the wringer and he has been thinking about it non-stop since it happened and wondering why. They were so kind and fun and wonderful, he doesn't understand why it had to be them of everyone. They deserved better, and though he knows the universe doesn't work that way, he can only hope that they still exist somewhere and that they know that he does care. That he misses them, and that he hopes they can still have fun. He's not spiritual, nor is he religious, but the thought brings him comfort, so he clings to it.

Since he's really the only one who actually gives himself space to mourn, it might look like he gets over it quickly, but really he just reaches his equilibrium faster than anyone else because he isn't trying to stuff the feelings down. He will always, always miss them, but he can only hope that they know how much he cares and how much love he has for them in his heart.

And even if privately, he will hold out the hope that someday, in some form, he'll get to see them again.

Vil Schoenheit

Vil handles his mourning with silence, and with shutting people out. No one needs to know how he is feeling, he's not a spectacle, and it's none of their business how he's handling it. That might be well and good in the eyes of the public but... in private, people are worried about him. They can't see him cry, but they can see that he's tired. His normally perfect complexion is marred by the dark bags that are under his eyes. He does a good job of covering them up, but for the people who see him every day, they can see the difference.

It's not that they haven't tried to talk to him about it, but whenever they try, Vil's temper gets the better of him. He is fine, they need to act like it. At least... he will be fine someday, and he doesn't have time to dally and linger on it right now. He can deal with processing his emotions when it's more convenient.

It fails in about the most spectacular way that it could have. He's asked for an interview, and while he's not acting right now to finish out his education, he still needs to keep himself relevant so he accepts. He doesn't know how the interviewer found their name, but they ask about them. Ask how they're doing-- entirely unaware-- and it hits Vil like a train. It is so unbecoming to have a breakdown on camera and especially so on live television, but he can't seem to stop it before it happens since it happens so fast. Before he's even aware of it, he's started crying and his mascara is starting to run.

He handles it as gracefully as he can, apologizing profusely for his crying and phrasing in the most detached way possible that they are no longer among the living. He ends up needing to ask to be excused half way through the interview and leaves the stage with cheeks streaked with his makeup and shaking. Despite it all, he holds it together long enough to get to his dressing room before the dam breaks and he starts sobbing.

He still has a long way to go, but if there is any saving grace, it's that the people around him care about him and are patient with him. After the interview even Neige reaches out to make sure he's okay and offer his support, and though Vil is overwhelmed and miserable, at least he knows he still has people to go to if he needs.

Idia Shroud

Idia is no stranger to death. Their death wasn't so traumatic as Ortho's, he hadn't seen them get mauled, and he didn't feel responsible for it, and yet it still hurts so badly. They had managed to get him to lower his walls-- get him to let them in to see who he was despite of his fear of their judgement. They had so easily made themself at home in his heart and now there was nothing there to fill that gap. Idia has no desire to fill it-- no one else is worth the effort.

Somehow he expected something like this should happen. It was a sort of dread that always stuck with him-- maybe its trauma? Either way, Idia has a track record of losing everyone who is important to him, so why would he try? He should have learned his lesson the first time and he can't find himself to feel anything but disappointment to start. He'd always shown his grief strangely-- look at Ortho.

He doesn't try to make a replacement for them, though. Something tells him that isn't what they would have wanted him to do, and as much as he loves Ortho, he thinks trying to recreate them might be impossible. He'd know Ortho better than anyone, but they were always so unpredictable and seemed to know exactly how to push him to open up. Even if he tried to recreate that, he would fail-- even he doesn't know how they managed to earn his trust.

He doesn't cry. Not really. He's spent a lot of his life crying over the dead-- cried more times over Ortho than he can count, and eventually it just... stopped. He doesn't think he can cry from sadness anymore.

He ends up knowing that he is destined to be alone. He already knew that, actually, but this cements it. He's going to end up losing the people he cares about, and regardless he's going to end up having to care for STYX and the underworld, and that's all he's got going for him in life.

Malleus Draconia

Nothing anyone could have said could have prepared Malleus for the reality of death. And a young death, at that. Malleus cared about them so, so much, treasured their company and their opinions and seeing how quickly their life had been snuffed out was devastating to him. He wasn't able to bring himself to speak to anyone for several days after it happened. Instead he retreated into himself entirely.

He knew that the others were worried-- Lilia kept bringing him food and insisting that he eat to sustain himself, but he finds that he can't taste anything and really has no desire to. He's listless, and while Lilia and his other retainers keep coming to sit with him, he's having a hard time holding himself together and continuing to push on.

It marks a fundamental change in Malleus-- something inside of him morphs and becomes cold. He struggles to let people in again. And while he ends up warming up again to his fellow fae and SIlver, he finds it so, so hard to let another human in even if he wants to. They're so fragile and getting hurt and he doesn't know if he can take it again.

Especially not when the person that he lost was as special as they are.

[readingloveswounds]

Do you ever write a conference abstract, and you feel very confident about your argument, and then once you start writing the paper you start feeling not so confident about the argument? Because that is happening to me right now and I'm freaking out.

Oh, absolutely. 100%. I am 2/2 for on this. I think (at least in my case) it's a part of the spectre of imposter syndrome that haunts my every move. It's also the fear of being Seen by strangers who you really want to respect you - you put in a lot of work and what if they think you're not smart (etc).

Some things that help me with this are:

attending other talks (conference or individual invited speakers). This reminds me of reality - that conference papers and talks are sometimes people just playing around with an idea and it doesn't have to be perfect and fully thought-through. I know that I will hold myself to a stupid level of perfectionism ('their paper can be imperfect/early stages but mine can't be' type shit), but it is VERY much okay to not be perfect, to say 'here's an idea i have, if you have any suggestions, I'd love to hear them'.

Let it suck. This is the 'just write it' advice. I am going to put SOMETHING in this word doc if it kills me and then I'll figure it out.

Saying 'okay, I think it sucks, but what am I going to do about that? Where can I improve?' Whether or not fears of the paper being terrible are founded, this helps me get out of the spiral and actually do something. Do I need to read through it again? Do I need to go back to my sources? Do I need to make a list? If you still think it's weak, it is (probably, it may depend on where you're giving the paper) possible to take the argument in a slightly different direction than your abstract - you can acknowledge the change if you like.

Do I need to go do something else? Sometimes I'm way too deep in things to see clearly. Whether this is working on something else, going on a walk, talking to people, a break can help.

Preparing as much as possible - I can't anticipate every question, but I have and will bring extra material (either in my head or in a small set of notes at the end of the paper) in case I want to have some solid extra ground to start with. If you're worried that your argument isn't great, here's some material to say 'hey i've done some work and even if my ideas aren't as developed as i'd like, here's some other information'

Remind yourself that you only have a short amount of minutes to speak! You can't fit a whole dissertation in that amount of time! You can't get deep into every single detail that you might want to! (This is something that I've been fighting with recently).

Conferences are for exchanging ideas. Plenty of people are assholes, but in theory, we go to conferences to talk to people, get outside perspectives on ideas, to collaborate. There will always be assholes, but there will also be people who will want to talk more about your paper and maybe guide you in directions for improvement that you didn't see at first.

As my parents told me about journal rejections, try not to take feedback too personally - it's not a judgement about you as a person. You are not your work.

Relatedly, unless you're presenting falsified data or massively plagiarising or something really serious like that, a not-so-great paper at a conference will not follow you forever (and if people are shitty about it, that's on them). There will always be next time. You can always mention later that you were a little silly in your past research! We are always growing and improving. This may not help in the moment, but it can help to put it a little more into perspective.

Essentially, yes, I do have this come up a lot. I have two conference papers coming up that I have to adapt and give in my second language. I feel like I'm going to disappoint both of the scholars who have invited me to give those. The thing is, I'm still going to write the papers because what would be even more disappointing is not giving them at all because I'm scared (and I am very scared). If I have something written, that's something I can improve as much as I can. Better to try and fail than not try at all, something like that.

I think confidence will come more with time (or so I hope), and if it doesn't, I at least now know a little how to handle this uncertainty with more confidence. I think it's fairly normal to have some doubts, but you can't let them get the best of you.

As they say so often on tumblr: do it scared, do it stupid, but however you do it, just do it.

[maraudersmary]

Some excerpts from the fic i’m writing:)

chapter one:

‘Thank fuck for you girls, honestly, this is just what I need.’ She exclaimed whilst flopping onto the sofa tightly between Mary and Lily, her best friends who had been there for her for everything.

‘Love you too Marls, bad day?’ Mary asked with a subtle undertone of worry. She knew it had only been six months and her friends had reason to be concerned, but Marlene didn’t need to be coddled. She pushed back the slight feelings of anger, knowing that her friends were being just that, her friends, and after everything she was the luckiest girl in the world to have people who still cared.

She dramatically sighed before saying, ‘Don’t worry, I'm okay, just casually met the love of my life and almost definitely made a very bad first impression.’

‘Spill!’ Lily exclaimed, always one for gossip despite being the kindest of them all.

chapter two:

Dinner at the Potter residence was a weekly event. The potter residence being James, Lily, and Sirius’s flat. They had been doing this for years, since they all came to uni, everyone would come together and chat and drink and cook and laugh. It was the highlight of all of their weeks, there were no expectations, no plans, just the chance to all be together and forget being adults for a night. Marlene used this night as an anchor, to remind herself of all that she still had and what she would lose if she fucked everything up again. Little had changed about these dinners in the six years since they started, they still joked and gossiped and made fun of each other, Peter and Mary still cooked the most delicious meals. Additions to the group had been made, Mary’s girlfriend Emmeline now came most weeks, Remus started coming as Marlene’s friend but now also as Sirius’s boyfriend. People had stopped coming, Gid and Fab had moved back to Spain, Benjy and Sirius had broken up and he was now firmly barred, yet for most the invite was always there should then want to attend. Just be at the Potter residence at 6:30 on Friday night.

chapter three:

tw for some depressive thoughts/metaphors

Marlene was under water, struggling desperately to resurface and not allow the tide she’d grown to know so well greet her like an old friend and carry her out of her depth. She had fought against the sea for so long at this point she had forgotten it’s power, forgotten how once she gave in, the comfort it provided. Sometimes being under water felt safest, like at least she knew she was overpowered and could surrender without guilt. Marlene knew that when she was underwater for long enough she could grow comfortable, because after all there was no happiness in death, and therefore no disappointment when joy was swept from under her and despair greeted her with a grin.

i have literally never written before and i’m aware this isn’t great but i’m hoping as i get further into it i improve:) no one ever told me that remembering the stuff you’ve written before is very difficult and therefore continuity is very difficult :’)

[properparadox]

A look back at 2023

I rarely wrote anything here nowadays. Having someone to talk to really changed a lot. But hey, this has been a tradition, so let's look back at 2023.

The year started slow, at least for several days, until  I was told to attend a Welding Inspector course. At that time, it had been years since I even hold an electrode holder. Suddenly everything changed. Until the end of March, my days were filled with classes and practice, for six days a week, 10 hours a day. The course were finished, and now I am an IWIP, probably (I haven't even received the diploma, but I wasn't invited for the retest).

This year, I went back and forth between Bandung, Solo and Purwokerto, to meet the love of my life. She graduated this August after such a struggle, so that was great.

Even though I still had less than two years in this job, I became a speaker on two different events. One for a Failure Analysis forum, and the other for a Solidworks event. After finishing my Welding Inspector course, I was also asked to teach the next batch of WI students on Destructive Testing module. For these experiences, I still need to learn a lot on how to speak in front of many people. Especially when teaching, I felt that I messed up on the timing and flow of the class.

Then, my first in-situ metallography job! And the second, and third, and fourth. They were tiring, sometimes we had to work nights, but those were interesting nonetheless.

On that family issue, I think it was pretty much finished, after spending quite a lot of money. Tho perhaps some help is still needed in the future. Oh, and shits still happened. Of course, that single person fucked up.

And all of a sudden, my relationship with @vanilachocolate progressed quite far. Hopefully everything will be a smooth sailing next year *fingers crossed*.

Writing this, I realized that a lot, and I mean A LOT, has happened this year. But again and again, I kept feeling that I didn't really grow much. I still feel lost, having no idea on where to go and what to do to improve myself. The department where I work at now is in a mess, and I'm having a hard time to move on from my previous job. I even attended a webinar that was not related at all to my current job, just because it had some relation to my previous one (the webinar was about Industrial Design). Even I had this crazy idea, to get certified as a national IP consultant, and perhaps I can return to my previous career. It was a very long shot, but honestly, I'm not sure about anything else.

When I finished typing this, light earthquake shook. The second time today. Before various dark thoughts come, let me close this year by wishing that 2024 will be a kind year for all of us here.

[bunnygirl678]

with my birthday coming up i'm feeling reflective;

i'm about to end my 20s and enter my 30s, looking back a ton has happened in 10 years, every decade i set goals (okay maybe i did it at 10 and again at 20, obvs bbs can't do shit) my goals for my 20s were;

graduate ✔️

get married ✔️

have a baby ✔️

make senior accountant (originally this was for public accounting, but i did one busy season and decided i would rather keep my sanity) my current company does not have the title senior accountant, but my title is accountant and i'm top, doing quite a bit of cfo/comptroller style work so i'm counting this as a win ✔️

Run a half-marathon (I was up to 10ks, then got pregnant and was told to stop running and working out, after that i really didn't have the time or whatever to get back into running until this year which i was doing well until i started getting sick)✖️

Only one of these things are things that I could actually control (graduate lol) but i managed to bag the rest of them i still managed to get married even if it ended in the big D (and I don't mean Dallas)

For my 30s I want to focus more on things that I control.

Learn a new language-I'm thinking Japanese and French, I really want to be able to understand them, not necessarily speak or write, but that would be bonus, i'd also like to learn more, and refresh my spanish skills back to where they were when i turned 20 lol

Learn art or at least keep up with it- i've written about wanting to learn how to draw multiple times, but now i'm actually doing it, i enjoy being creative, i'm always working on a craft, but now i'm really putting the effort into art, i know it's something you have to keep up with so here's to daily practice even if it's a quick small doodle

keep writing- used to i wanted to write the epic novel that would be remembered for centuries, but as i've gotten older i realized i just wanted attention, now that i'm older and not living with my parents i've accepted the fact that i'm not interested in writing outside of fanfics and the occasional technical piece, i don't need to be remembered and any writing i do should be for fun (or for research purposes)

understand my health better- after i got a pulmonary embolism at 17 then another at 19 i sort of just got used to being on blood thinners, right before my 20th i changed my diet to oil-free vegan then just vegan, i was really feeling good and i think it was all of the fresh ingredients, so i'd like to go back to that, i'm cutting out wheat again, and dairy temporarily, but also this year i was diagnosed with adhd so understanding it is a goal, i remember in college when i was running and eating healthy all the time i was suffering less so i'd like to get back to that, and then as always getting my allergy issues under control, i think the main thing here is just finding out what works and what doesn't, and accepting giving up certain things that cause problems

run a half-marathon- i love running, i started again this year, i missed it a lot, now that i'm getting older i need to make sure to improve my physical health, the thing about training with running is it is also good to cross train, so add in weights, flexibility and so on, i was running best when i weight trained and did yoga, so going to hopefully pick those back up

Get back into sewing- in college i used to sew all a lot of my own clothes, i constantly got compliments on my stuff, i still sew now and then but it's mostly mending or random crafts, i'd like to get back into clothes, as well as tailoring (really redoing) thrifted clothes, which is where i buy something a size too big and practice my sewing skills by reworking the clothes into something cute, it reuses clothes and is a lot cheaper than buying fabric, i'd also like to work with silk, i don't buy silk clothes a lot, but i've found my skin reacts better to it but it's so expensive, a lot cheaper to just buy fabric

attend more festivals/activities- i really enjoy getting out into the community and doing things, seeing things, my exhusband was (and still is) a homebody, he also would complain when I went to things, always wanting me at home with him, so now that we're not together i'd like to start attending things in the community again

pick piano back up/learn a new instrument (violin??)- i used to play the piano and sing in the church choir in high school, unfortunately i can't sing anymore, at least not without having to yawn and take in more air I lost my ability to sing for long periods after my first pulmonary embolism, but now i'd really like to expand my brain by learning violin something i always wanted to learn but never had the ability to as a kid, but as an adult i can, picking piano back up and teaching my kid too

pay off debt/use credit sparingly- we had some financial troubles back a few years ago, and i racked my credit cards up, i've been slowly paying them, but i'd like to pay it all off and really only use in an emergency

be a good mom- self explanatory

My birthday is only 9 days after new year so i always feel like new years and a new age are pretty closely intertwined, so i guess here is to my 30s, i hope i make fewer shitty decisions lmao

[scarletspider-lily]

this is going to be a pretty long rant.

so my family is church of Christ (so like, babtist lite). I am a closeted agnostic. unfortunately, it's getting pretty obvious because my younger sister got babtized a few years ago, and I still haven't. I basically told my mom that since covid I've been disassociating, and can't "feel god".

she has freaked out and is using every chance to push religion on me. it's getting rough. what makes it worse is that our church hasn't had a permanent preacher since April. there's also this guy named C. C's family is very entrenched in our church. C has been both song leader and college group leader (our church is very close with a local college) for several years. C's sons run AV and events. C's dad was a preacher, and is now an elder. now, C wants to be preacher.

my mom is starting to think C is subconciously hungry for power in the church and is considering moving to a different church. however, she hates all the other surrounding churches of Christ. so she told me that we'd visit around and find whatever church helped me "feel god" best.

now I could totally reinvent myself at a new church, get babtized just to please her, and all would be well. except she wants me to do Bible studies on her Bible app and do family devotionals and watch her terrible preachy Zionist leaning YouTube channels. I'm exhausted. no matter what I do she'll keep badgering me because she believes it's her duty to make sure I get to heaven. I can't even ignore her, recently we went on a road trip and she got started on the topic again, and because I refused to talk to her about it, she pulled the car over and wouldn't move again until I talked. she begged me, said that the silent treatment was worse than anything I could throw at her, but I know how terrible my life will be if she finds out the truth. on top of that, I'm gay and hiding the fact that I'm dating one of my best friends.

she's even trying to find a church for me in a different city for when I move away for college. at least I only have 8 more months in this house.

my 18th birthday is in a few days, but I know that me being an adult won't change things. she's the parent, so she has the power. she'll never be happy until I'm under her control.

I know you probably don't have any advice, I just had to say it somewhere. I'm so tired.

hey, sorry for seeing this so late. to be honest, i dont have advice but i hope your situation improves, i can relate to some of it, like the finding a church when you move for college thing. once again i'm sorry for the late reply but i hope you know that youre in my thoughts, and i sincerely wish everything goes well and yeah, being 18 but still under your parents is rough, but not uncommon. it is good you're moving out though, i hope you can somehow find a way to lie that you're attending church or something, or just attend a few services- either way i hope it will be better than you staying at home now!